Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Live Show with Arielle Vandenberg

Episode Date: December 17, 2019

Actress, model, comedian, and most recent host of US Love Island Arielle Vandenberg joins Kaitlyn on the live stage in California. They two are a wild duo and have lots to talk about and firs...t up is a conversation about periods accompanied by nonstop laughter. Next, they play 'Ken You Not: Los Angeles Edition' and Arielle explains why everyone in LA does improv. As always, stay tuned for a crazy crowd confession and Arielle's story about a passionate kiss with a Backstreet Boy. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Okay, let's talk about the original enemies to lovers story. Before all of our reality TV couples, before the rom-coms, we binge, there was Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy in pride and prejudice. And Audible has just dropped a brand new original that will have you completely hooked, I am. It's not just any audiobook. This is a full cast performance. So Marisa Abella, you might know her from industry, brings Elizabeth Bennett to life.
Starting point is 00:00:25 And Harris Dickinson from Baby Girl and Where the Crawdads Sing is Mr. Darcy. And honestly, the chemistry, you guys, it's everything. Plus, you've got icons like Glenn Close, Bill Nye and Will Poulter in the mix. Talk about a dream cast. Now, what I love is how Marissa pulls you right into Lizzie's world, her stubbornness, her wit, her messy family dynamics, and of course, her complicated feelings for Darcy. And with a vibrant new adaptation and original score by Grammy-nominated composer, it just feels so fresh and modern while still keeping that timeless Jane Austen charm.
Starting point is 00:00:58 So whether it's your first time experiencing Pride and Prejudice or you've read it a million times, you're going to fall absolutely in love all over again. So go listen to Pride and Prejudice now at audible.ca slash Jane Austen. Get ready for lots of laughs tabby topics on filtered advice and wine lots of wine get ready to shake things up here's Caitlin guys do you know what my guest is tonight? I already got my ab workout backstage we were just laughing so hard I don't like she's so funny and I don't get it because she's also so pretty and she's also so beautiful on the inside that I'm like really Oh, well, thanks. I'm like this. Who else do you know like that?
Starting point is 00:02:08 But, okay, so she is a hilarious actress, YouTuber, model, content creator, host of Love Island. She rose to fame back in the day through her six-second buying videos. You can now find her posting quality content on the gram and YouTube. She's a mom to her dog, Stinky. That is her dog's name.
Starting point is 00:02:30 Also, a recent fiancé to her long-time beau, Matt. So excited to have her here tonight. Let's introduce R.L. Benberg. Oh, my God. I know. Everyone is so hot. So hot. So cute.
Starting point is 00:02:45 And so drunk. I love it. Yeah. Which, would you like a little... I want some of the... White, white. White. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:55 How about our entrance? What? Would you guys buy our album? Yeah. Please, can we please write a Christmas song together?
Starting point is 00:03:07 Okay, we're going to write one right now. Ready? Oh, f***. Christmas Time is here. And just the national anthem. Oh, Christmas time.
Starting point is 00:03:27 I'm here through the November Also, I need to address something. One. You're also on your period. I'm ovulating. Oh. Loves ovulation.
Starting point is 00:03:42 Wow! Big ovulation guy over here. Big fan. Big fan. Oh, no. I'm 33. I'm wearing a crop top. Yes.
Starting point is 00:03:55 Things are happening. I'm sweating, though. Yeah. Even though. And then I'm also sweating so bad that I had to put a napkin around this. Because, well, also because they're disgusting. Oh. So I was like, ew, sick.
Starting point is 00:04:08 I'm not going to touch that. So I put a napkin around it so I don't sweat and stick to it. I can't believe. I just wanted to address it so no one was like, what's that? Wait. It just looks like a cool little fancy microphone holder. You know what? It's actually a dress for my mic.
Starting point is 00:04:22 So, yeah. Put a napkin on your mic and call it fashion. It is. Yeah. Yeah. Let me tell you. Backstage, I took a swig right from the tequila bottle, and I have to apologize because I didn't realize you were coming. I didn't realize you were a germaphobe. Oh. Yeah. That's what I was going to say. That's the thing I'm not drinking tequila tonight.
Starting point is 00:04:42 Oh, I thought you didn't. Yeah. I am a germaphobe, though. She's drinking spade and sparrows. That's okay. I'm drinking white spade and sparrows. Yeah. By the lovely Caitlin. Cheers. Cheers. Yep. Cheers. We were talking about how many guys are in the crowd.
Starting point is 00:04:59 Take a sip. What? You've got to take a sip after you cheers. It's bad luck. Am I supposed to look in the iTunes? And then you eyes and then you... Eyes. Eyes.
Starting point is 00:05:09 This girl knows. She knows what eyes are. Yeah. You're scaring me a little bit. She's like... I get it. All right. So I'm always pretty open about anxiety in the past and current.
Starting point is 00:05:23 I think it's so important to be open and honest about these things. I think so many people out there suffer from issues with mental health, and it's something I know many of my vinos can relate to. So whenever I feel my chest start to tighten, my anxiety coming on, truthfully, the first thing I do is look for ramen. Well, Pino now as well, but they really are the only things that really keep me calm. I focus on their breathing, which is interesting. But that's exactly what emotional support animals are for and to be part of your mental health treatment plan and help when you really need it. So after opening up about this sensitive part of my life, Madison, who is actually part of my podcast team, she shared with me about her anxiety and how difficult it was to get her dog, Eleanor, an ESA letter because while therapy is obviously essential to mental health, it's also difficult to come by for a lot of people. So Raman is my emotional support animal, and I wanted to help Madison make Eleanor her emotional support animal too.
Starting point is 00:06:17 So we did some research online. we came across surta pet.com, which is a telehealth company. It connects you with a licensed therapist who does mental health evaluations, and then she issues a clinical treatment plan. So if you qualify after your session, you can have the documentation necessary for your pet to be an ESA within 48 hours. So Madison was able to get her ESA letters for Eleanor in just a couple of days. And now when she travels, she can keep Eleanor right on her lap with her to help her anxiety.
Starting point is 00:06:46 So if you guys are struggling with mental health issues and want to see if you qualify for an ESA, get connected with a therapist online now by heading to surta pet.com slash vine. That's C-E-R-T-A-Pet.com slash vine. Or use code Vine at surta-pet.com for 15% off your evaluation. We're talking about how many men are in the crowd tonight. Your fiancé is not here due to a little bit of a man cold. He has a man cold. A man called.
Starting point is 00:07:15 What's a man-cote? Oh. Do you ladies know what a man cold is? I don't know what a man cold is. Oh my God, bless your heart right here. What's your name? Skip. That's even better?
Starting point is 00:07:29 I love Skip. Skippy. Skippy, my man, right in the front. That's your boss? That's your boss? Oh. Oh. Is this weird?
Starting point is 00:07:42 Are things happening? Did you just get fired? For being here? Did you get fired for interrupting my speech at the beginning? Skip. One, we just bless your soul for being here. Also, now I'm nervous. I talked about my period twice already.
Starting point is 00:08:05 Okay. No, let's talk about our period. Yeah, but it's bloody. It's a bloody mess, God damn it. Yeah, it's not fun. I remember you did a story about your... period and a bunch of women are like, thank you for talking about it because nobody talks about it and we're all suffering. We're all suffering here. No, it's true. I mean, I was just on my period
Starting point is 00:08:27 you guys and it was great and but every freaking time I'm like, I wonder who else feels like this and then I get so and then I say something about it on Instagram and then everybody's like, oh me too, oh my God, I can't believe. And I'm like, it's so crazy that we're embarrassed to like talk about how depressed we get or how anxious we get or how freaking bloated we get and it's like this is real shit and I'm like every month of every year every month of our lives is Blake trying to do I'm trying to do the math there every month of every month everything makes sense to you you're like oh that's the best part about Jason is he's like nobody's ever explained that to me before I was like let me break it down for you on the 11th of every month
Starting point is 00:09:15 At approximately 102. I will turn out to a dragon. It's a nightmare. I really do. And I'm fully aware. And there's nothing we can do about it. And every guy out there just needs to know that during that time, you need to say, what do you want to watch tonight on TV, honey? I like that.
Starting point is 00:09:41 What do you want for dinner tonight? I like that. Yeah. I like the way you hold this. This mic too. You hold it like this. Am I a rapper or? Like it's like a, like, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:09:51 You're just really into it. Oh. I'm very insecure with the, I'm like, hey, guys. See, I see you as a little more casual. And you're like, very, very confident with the mic. I think I'm just. Also, my mic has a dress on, so I want you to look up it. I have to like, yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:06 Let's just talk about you for a second. Please know. Yeah, no, it's happening. Okay. There's a blown up photo of me dancing in the back. We have to talk about you or it gets weird. also so cute oh thanks also you're i mean you know this i'm talking to you like you don't know this but you're outside on the sign like a big old photo of you oh i didn't know that it's it's amazing
Starting point is 00:10:25 i was driving i was at the stoplight and i was like oh and i was like oh yeah i'm going there i was like is it this photo nope i didn't prove it's like it's like a very beautiful photo of you with a little scrunchy and you're like oh yeah oh i'm just did anyone get a photo and you can send it to me i think you're like you're like touching your lip i think i'm pretty sure you were like no no Calm down. He needs to show. No, it's true. No, it's true.
Starting point is 00:10:48 I got tagged in a photo that I saw it. Oh, well, now I'm just confused on what photo it is because... No, you're... It's a photo. Oh, there she is. Oh, yeah. Yep, there it is. Very cute.
Starting point is 00:11:00 Are you not touching your lips? Oh, I'm doing this old thing. Oh, got it. Like the, I don't know what's going on. Let me think about it. Yeah, like, you know, when... This is the funny part. It's like girls with really nice nails, like the Kylie Jenner nails.
Starting point is 00:11:14 They always do. this pose but I have like 13 year old boy nails and I never do them so when I do this it's like oh it's not as cute but yeah but like says a lot about her confidence I go like this oh like up I'm professor like you're in the fifth grade at a photo shoot at your school like a little school boy yeah like a school boy back to you okay um okay so can I just address something that I know you're so fucking humble and it's gonna be fine but Jennifer Aniston follows you on Instagram. I know.
Starting point is 00:11:48 Like, I thought I was so cool when she responded to me and I was like, oh, she follows my girlfriend. Yeah. Yeah. She follows you. And you guys are like, hey, cutie. I know her. Like, how do you know her?
Starting point is 00:11:57 What's going on here? I'm friends with Jen. I don't know what you want me to tell you. No, I don't know what you. I don't know what you want me to say. And Justin Timberlake. I saw him. Like I said.
Starting point is 00:12:09 Like I said, humble. I don't know. I don't know. Um, no. he commented on your post once i shit every time even though i know he's followed me for like he's followed me for like a year now what and then every time he likes it i'm like and i just release myself yeah yeah it's like still so exciting i don't care how many times he likes or comments or anything i'm just like that's fucking justin timber lake which by the way he's he is the most both of those people which is so cool that they both follow me
Starting point is 00:12:42 P.S. Yeah. But they are the nicest people. I've heard that. The nicest humans. And I'm not just saying that because they're celebrities. Like they're so kind. And they're just amazing.
Starting point is 00:12:52 And like down to earth. I've heard they're both very great. Very, very down to earth. Because there's some people you hear about and you're like, oh, like. Yeah. Like you don't want to talk to that. Yeah. Like you don't, you know, I like.
Starting point is 00:13:02 I love her. I heard she's just not pleasant to work with. Gwyneth Paltrow. Gwyneth Paltrow. Well, I don't know. I've read it on the internet. Oh, I've heard that too. I've heard that too.
Starting point is 00:13:10 I heard that too. It was so interesting. Well, it was Snapchat, and I was going through one of those stories of the 10 worst celebrities to work with, so I just rolled with it. You know, I, so, yeah. Well, is it, she seems like very cold. But I don't know her. I don't know about that so mean. She seems great.
Starting point is 00:13:28 She's got a really great, she's great energy. Great energy. I love her. But what, how do you know Jen Annison? Oh. No, seriously. Okay. We need to know the background here.
Starting point is 00:13:40 Well... And just a side note, Justinippurly commented on her voice. She's got... He did? Yes. You did a riff that you were obviously just kidding about, but when she just kissed, she's like nails every single note.
Starting point is 00:13:53 And he was like, that riff, though. And I was like, uh, the riff king is up. He's like, that riff, though, sucks, though. And you're like, oh, no, man. He did a fire emoji next to it. That's dope. That's dope. Um, like you didn't notice. I went, okay, this is, I haven't told anybody of this.
Starting point is 00:14:10 But I did go, I did go. After, like, some event I went to, I went to a thing, and Jennifer Aniston was there, and she knew people that I was with, and we all ended up at her house. I know. Casual? Super casual. Very casual. And then, like, you know, when you're, like, walk into someone's house like that,
Starting point is 00:14:29 you're like, wow, this is so beautiful. And then you're like, this is cool. It's whatever. But she, that's honestly, like, how I ended up, like, talking to her. I don't know. I ended up at a thing and then she knew people and then I knew people and we were there together and then she followed
Starting point is 00:14:45 and I ended up going to her house and I was like she's just cool like that she was like everyone come over and just very sweet so what you're saying is I have a chance you do oh okay oh you do yeah if she's gonna love anybody but me it's you oh yeah yeah for sure oh she would be obsessed with you I'm so on my period
Starting point is 00:15:04 I just don't cry and by the way like it's not like I talk to Jen Anniston every day like I I we No, but you're like... Mumbled through that. Yeah, you're like, she's so humble. I don't, like, have her number or something.
Starting point is 00:15:15 I've known you for how long, like, not long, but I've known you longer than you've known me because I'm a fan, but we, like, met on a podcast last year. Yeah, yeah, I think so. And then I, like, see people that follow you in comment, and I'm like, you're so humble. Okay, I'm being a fan.
Starting point is 00:15:30 What am I supposed to do? Be like, dun, thud, blah, like... Yeah, like me, where I took a screenshot of Jen Annison. commenting on my photo posted it to the world and said the one where I shit my pants
Starting point is 00:15:47 because I was bragging so yes you are very humble okay too shit yeah no that's true I didn't play cool I don't know I just like whatever we'll move on to the next question about you I'm sweating
Starting point is 00:16:02 is everyone I'm sweating can we talk about the AC in this place it's rough And I am wearing a very heavy sweater with, speaking of friends. I can't take this off because I'm wearing a little tea. You can't? No.
Starting point is 00:16:16 Can't do it. I don't like my arms. You don't like your what? I don't like my arms. I thought you said your lungs, but arms is just as weird. You have a great body. No, no, I like my arms. It's not that.
Starting point is 00:16:29 It's like, it's the way, like, when you sit with, when you have to, like, I could walk around with these arms. But, like, sitting here with these arms, I would feel like I would just pay attention to these arms all the time. Oh, like, they're not like, you're not like this. Yeah, no, yeah, no. Okay. Like, when you sit somewhere for too long and you're like, are they looking at my arms? Is that a thing? It's a thing for me.
Starting point is 00:16:50 Oh, I feel that way about, like, not a thing. When I wear my skirts. I'm not to touch up my lips. Huh? What color is that? Because people are going to want to know. It's called giddy. It's called giddy.
Starting point is 00:17:00 Nope. Just giddy. Just don't make it sexual. Drop the up. Drop the up. She's like, it's called giddy up. I'm like, nope. You guys know me
Starting point is 00:17:09 I'm the sexual one You have sex one time on TV And apparently Yeah, you go to stage You go to stage, you go to stage You go to stage goes one time Man exactly exactly that's i'm sure a lot of us have those moments you know i didn't even hear what he said
Starting point is 00:17:43 he said you go to stage coach one time oh shit yeah like i got to tell you you had a really big missed opportunity at halloween even though you were judge judy it was amazing because everyone judges blake and blake was judge judy so he was like i got to judge you for once that's good It was amazing. It was a great costume, but you had a real missed opportunity when you could have been dressed, like, with the handkerchief with, like, a coach's whistle around your neck and then just said stage on your shirt, and then you were stage coach. No, I got DM that so many times. It's like, wear a, they were like, wear a stage around your waist. Yes.
Starting point is 00:18:27 And then wear a whistle. Yeah, yeah. But, yeah. Why didn't you do that? Because I don't get enough stagecoach jokes. Oh, yeah. It's like you would think you'd address it and it would go away, but it just like... Never.
Starting point is 00:18:38 Are we over it? Oh, no, we're not. Nope. Half the crowd said no. I feel like you're doing a cool thing by doing this. All of a sudden, I'm just like end up the show like this. I'm just getting real comfortable. I would rather be sitting like that.
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Starting point is 00:19:55 Lecroywater.com. And for more information, join the LeCroy community on social at LeCroy Water. So we're in California, but technically we're close to L.A. You're... You got to say it's not. Oh, is that about... No, no, no, yeah, yeah. I addressed this. It's Brea.
Starting point is 00:20:12 What just happened? That's my fault. I said we're close to... Got it, yeah. Or did you say, what's up, Los Angeles? No, I said it's L.A. or Braya? And I was like, I got, like... Oh, no, it's Braya, California.
Starting point is 00:20:24 Oh. It's not, right? No one screamed for that. Orange County. Orange County. See, I told you All you have to say is one thing To get a crowd fired up
Starting point is 00:20:36 The other day a girl told me to say Go Beavers and I couldn't talk For five more minutes after that It was like, I was like, oh okay More reference, we were in Oregon I wanted to open every show with Go Beavers and see who goes crazy There's got to be like someone
Starting point is 00:20:49 From like a middle school that like Went to a Beaver school I don't know Or the Canadians That sounded weird In all girls school I went to a beaver school You did?
Starting point is 00:21:02 No, I didn't. I was a joke. I was playing along with my own joke. Oh. And I fell for it like an idiot. You did. Where did you grow up? You grew up in California.
Starting point is 00:21:10 I was, I was, I was, oh, yes, Queens. Fallb. Are you from Fallbrook? Pomona. Oh, that's cute. Ramona. Oh. Famona.
Starting point is 00:21:23 Romona. Ramona. Got it. Wait, I'm from Fallbrook. I was, but, well, no, no. No. I was born in L.A. Boo.
Starting point is 00:21:33 And then I went to high school in San Diego, well, Fallbrook, and then, and now I'm back. Well, sort of. Now I'm in Orange County. Do you guys like, like, is it like the O.C.? Or is that stupid? Yeah. I got in shit.
Starting point is 00:21:51 When I went to San Francisco, and I said San Fran, and they were like, hmm. Yeah, I know. I didn't know that. Why not, though? Don't see Cali. Oh, C. Shit.
Starting point is 00:22:01 It's literally what I just captioned my photo. You said to delete so many captions. I just captioned it. Look. What? Three hours ago. Live podcast tour. Hello, Kelly.
Starting point is 00:22:13 That's cute. What's wrong with that? They just said, don't say Callie. What is just to say? Hello, California? Like, I'm from Canada. I can say whatever the hell I want. Yes, I don't get it.
Starting point is 00:22:25 You can say whatever you want. But because I feel a little bit of vibes towards. the Los Angeles. I feel like we should do a can you not segment on L.A. Yeah, I'm down. This is where Blake needs to come in with that can you not?
Starting point is 00:22:42 Uh-oh. It's broken. I was teaching. Or we could just do ourselves. Ready? Can you not? Yeah. That was really good. It's way better than me. This is the best night of my life. Go on.
Starting point is 00:22:57 Oh, me too. I know. Um, can you not LA? I feel like you've got a good one. Um, can you not tell me how many improv classes you just signed up for? Los Angeles. As we're at an improv theater and I'm like, I do improv. But it's true. I mean, everyone in L.A. does improv. Is that because they want to get good at acting? I swear to you. Okay, so I've done it, obviously. I've done all the improv classes you could possibly take in L.A. And, and there was like doctors in my classes. There were public speakers but they just want to break out of their shell or they just want to be more comfortable
Starting point is 00:23:32 in front of people. Yeah, so they come and do the class and then they go back to their like nurse job. And it's so crazy because it's like... They can like banter with the patience. I'm really trying to be an actor. Get out. Like, I take this very seriously.
Starting point is 00:23:49 You know? We don't have room for you doctors. No, I'm kidding. But like one time I was like, that guy's really good. Like you should be in movies. He's like, no, I'm a doctor. I'm like, whoa. Really? Yes.
Starting point is 00:24:00 Okay, yeah, can you not? Can you not? Does anybody have one? Wow. Usually the crowd goes wild. What the hell? Usually you all raise your hands. Ariel has another one.
Starting point is 00:24:14 Because you don't have any. Can you not talk about whole food? Can you not talk about how you're a vegan? Oh. Yeah. Can you not talk about juicy? Good one, Caitlin Oh, I tried
Starting point is 00:24:31 I tried Sorry, I really thought that was Oh You should have like a I do-doo-doo I tried Sorry, I thought it was going to land It didn't land
Starting point is 00:24:40 It's okay Avocado toast I think that's everywhere That's even in Nashville now Nashville's really trying to get down They're like we have avocado toast They're like Everyone from L.A. is moving to Nashville
Starting point is 00:24:55 I don't know why that's happening But they are My two really good friends, just moved to Nashville. She's a country singer, so it makes sense. Okay, well, that's fair. Yeah. So if you're a country singer, you go to Nashville. If you're an actress, actor, do you like the term actress? I heard that's a no-no. I like whatever. Okay. But you've done some pretty good things.
Starting point is 00:25:13 Thank you. I like to pump my guest tires. I like to talk about it. So, like, tell us your favorite thing you've done in the acting world. Because you've done modeling, YouTubeing, content creating. You've done the vines. You've done it all. Are you on TikTok? Honestly, I'm mad at you for asking me that. Oh, because you are.
Starting point is 00:25:35 Oh, wait. Just kidding. I talked to someone else backstage about TikTok. Oh, it was like, why would you ask me? I can't figure it out. I can't either. I literally, like, I think I'm pretty savvy with social media. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:48 And then I go on TikTok and I'm like, how do you do anything? Do you guys get TikTok? What do you? I don't, my niece, who is 11 gets it. I want to do it. it because it seems cool and I think it'd be really popular on it. We should try and do one right now with the crowd? Yes. Do you have TikTok loaded up? I'm ready to go? Do I have TikTok loaded up? All right. Calm down. We'll be back with more Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow.
Starting point is 00:26:16 Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow. So backstage, we're talking about confessions. But I never like to know my guest's confession because I want it to be like shock value when you come out here. So here's what we're going to to do. Ariel's going to confess. Blake, do you have one today, or are we just fresh out? I'll figure one out. Okay.
Starting point is 00:26:35 It usually has something to do with masturbation. Sorry, Skip. My last confession was weird. And maybe Skip has a confession for us.
Starting point is 00:26:47 Skip? Skip. Nope. Nope. No. Not doing it. We're not going to pressure Skip.
Starting point is 00:26:56 My confession's about Skip. So there you go So we can include Skip in your confession I'm going to pick one or two people from the crowd to tell a confession That's fun
Starting point is 00:27:11 Yeah Usually they're good I gotta tell you guys Are you a Vino? Are you a Vino? The Vinoes tell me some shit I love it Like I'm like whoa
Starting point is 00:27:24 Are you sure you want that out there With your full name But I respect it, but I respect it. Okay, so why don't we start with a vino confession? Yeah, I think that's the best way to go. Because I don't know how, who did I talk in the air. This, two hands. Wait, I need like a, I need like a category of like, like, what is yours have to do with?
Starting point is 00:27:49 Okay. Okay, great, great. Okay, anal p, poo. Okay, another P one. about her breaking and entering okay i'm gonna go with anal yeah oh my god i'm up here course you can yeah get on up here what's your name scarlet scarlet and your last name and how we can stock you in instagram um i'm just kidding you don't have to just tell us just tell us your anal confession that so don't tell us your instagram tell us your anal confession that's more normal
Starting point is 00:28:27 So naturally, I was with my boyfriend for five years. And if you're a good girlfriend at that point, then that's when you try to experiment with things. Okay, so I was like, yeah, I'll try anil. What's Skip thinking right now? What is Skip doing? Skips at her table. Who is Skip to you?
Starting point is 00:29:04 Is Skip your dad? Yeah. Sorry, Dad. Skip. Get out. No, he's on me. Oh, my God. Okay, okay.
Starting point is 00:29:21 I'm sorry. All right. Skips your boyfriend. Got it. Go on. Get your. Okay, so, again, I tried anal, and then the next week, I shit myself on accident. Oh, boy.
Starting point is 00:29:35 And then the week after, I shit myself again. So I went to the doctor, and I... Go on. So, I went to the doctor, and I was like, there's something wrong with my asshole. Because... Sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down. She's like, to have her anal moment.
Starting point is 00:30:03 No, I kept shitting myself, and so my doctor checked my butthole, and she said there was everything was fine with it, nothing was wrong, and I stopped having anal, and I stopped shitting myself. So. Yes.
Starting point is 00:30:18 I love you for that. I love you for that. Now what are we going to take away from this podcast, today. Don't do an all. Thank you so much. Oh, you can go out this way. Oh, they're going to just walk you outside and right out the door and you're never allowed back in. Cool, thanks.
Starting point is 00:30:40 I was just kidding. I was like, where are they taking her? He's like, come with me. I'm like, oh. It's her boyfriend. You, come on. It's like their bit that they get really into. He's like, you.
Starting point is 00:30:55 come with me and you're like oh no no wow good for them um so yeah don't don't do that i guess uh five years maybe at 10 five years not worth it maybe at 10 put a ring on it right like okay low low i what what oh okay here we go here we go yes The low down is clapping for anal. Yes, hello. The guy with a leather jacket likes anal. You know what I will say? I did a podcast with Nikki Glazer, and she talked about how great anal was, and I still can't get down.
Starting point is 00:31:40 But she was like, she said, do you know what it feels like? It feels like when you have that eye-crossing shit, and you're like, oh, that's what it feels like. And I'm like, no, it doesn't. You can't tell me that that's two in the same. It's just... I'm done with it. I'm done. We're done with it.
Starting point is 00:31:55 I'm done with this conversation. All right. This is when you guys start chanting Jason. Is it like that you? I'm sorry, I started it. We don't do A-N-O, I'm sorry. I told you the second half gets weird. I told you.
Starting point is 00:32:14 All right, it's the holidays, and I think I can guess what you're doing. You're out buying stuff. Did I get it right? I feel like that's what we do all of December. Kids, friends, grandparents, your other half, everyone's getting something from you this year so here's a festive tip don't just buy by buy why don't you sell sell sell with mercari you know mercari the selling app that makes selling your stuff fast and easy so here's what you do you go through your home find all the good stuff that you just don't use you know you have it the phone in the drawer the jeans that you only wore once that handbag hiding in the back of your closet maybe even something someone got you for christmas last year then you take a few picks add a description and boom your eye item is connected to millions of buyers. It's super easy. Mercari even emails you a shipping label when it sells. The app has over 5,000 reviews on the app store with an average 4.8 star rating, so why not
Starting point is 00:33:06 give it a try? Everything ships, too, so there are no awkward meetups with strangers. I hate that. And let's face it, we would all like to avoid that. So finally, an app that makes you money. Clear out your closets and fill up the piggy bank on Mercari. Check out Mercari and lighten the load this holiday. That's M-E-R-C-A-R-C-A-R-I, Mercari, the selling app. Blake, have you thought of a confession over there? Not a good one. Okay, not a good one. You guys go first. Mine is not great. Mine's not great. I told it on the podcast today on, I did a podcast
Starting point is 00:33:38 with Becca Tilly. Yeah. I know, she's so great. Yeah, scrubbing in. Yeah, she's so great. She's been a friend of mine for a long time. And Herp, Herb. Yeah. Rub it in, why don't you? Award winning. We get it. She won the People's Choice Award. I wanted to go up there and be like, like Kanye hurt.
Starting point is 00:34:02 You had your mom in last year and Becca, Tanya. But I think Caitlin deserves the reward. What did he say? I'm like trying to think of what he said so bad. I'm going to let you have your minute. Yeah, I'm going to let you finish. But I think Caitlin deserves this podcast award. It's okay.
Starting point is 00:34:18 I think she's a lovely woman, though. It's okay. I'm being. set up again because now I'm up for the I heart awards. Yes. Oh, that's amazing. No, it's a set up. I'm against Ben and Ashley who are with I heart. Yeah, she's
Starting point is 00:34:30 not with I heart. I'm not with I heart. It's a setup. What doesn't matter? We're all great. We're all great. And we love everybody and I especially love Becca and I had her on my podcast today and she told me the funniest confession that I really didn't see coming from her because she's very like
Starting point is 00:34:46 G-rated and sweet and like she was talking about it and she She was like, yeah, so I did this. I'm not going to tell you because you have to tune in because I need my downloads. And she was talking about what she did with a situation with constipation. And she said it was so much, it wasn't anal. She's back. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:35:04 Yeah. Wait, that was quick. She said it was so much confidence that I was like, ha ha. Well, now I want to try that. Because it wasn't a big. She didn't make it seem. No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:35:17 No, no, no, no. Um, but mine, I'll tell you just because it happened today, but I was on my way to podcast with her and Jason was like, well, why don't you just take the car we rented? And I was like, uh, I'm gonna Uber. And he was like, why? I'm like, ah, I just need to go through some emails. But really, I just wanted to get the good lighting so I could pluck some chin hairs. Yeah. Okay. You didn't see that coming. Did you get some good ones? Two. Oh, yeah. That's it? You guys know what I'm talking about. Don't make me feel stupid. Oh, no. I have like, I have one. Okay. I have one. Oh. No. Dan? No, I wasn't even going to say on my chin. I don't have chin hair. Oh, nipples. I have, I don't have a nipple hair, but it's under, it's an under-boob.
Starting point is 00:35:57 Wow. And it's a long under-boob hair. I so, I was wondering what he was doing for some reason. She was like, look at me, and like, you know, you know. I have one boob hair. Underneath. It's under, and I'm like, and. Interesting.
Starting point is 00:36:17 I leave it. it's so long I'm just kidding no it's just a different type of hair right thick coarse thin blonde it's like a darker thicker
Starting point is 00:36:30 hair yeah wow that's an odd place but you we are women it's one though and it's like where are your friends why aren't you up here why aren't you lower you're just like weirdly just there
Starting point is 00:36:44 it's like whoops wrong spot I'm gonna keep coming back though I don't know what happens It's called hormones. Damn, those hormones. Yeah. Skip, am I right? It's so bad.
Starting point is 00:36:55 Oh, Skipper. It is. Okay, well, you, that's not your confession, though. Weirdly, it was. No, I'm kidding. Weirdly, that was just something you wanted to share with us. I just wanted to tell you guys. That you felt obviously confident about because you don't pluck it.
Starting point is 00:37:08 Thank you. I didn't want you to be like, you guys don't have chin ears. I'm like, I have under boob hair, so it's okay. Thank you. You're such a good friend. good friend. I'm like Adam Sandler. You know what I mean? When he pees his pants for the little boy? Yeah, if peeing your pants. That sounds really me too. Do you guys know Billy Madison? Yeah. There we go. And he's like, if peeing your pants is cool. No, though, teacher, I consider me Miles Davis.
Starting point is 00:37:34 Hello. He's like, no, this is the best part. Just just stay with me for a second. So, um, this little boy is like this against the wall and they're at a school field trip and he's like this. My favorite part of the whole movie is Billy Madison goes, what do you fall in love with the walls? Okay, okay, because of that, my dog likes to lick my seatbelt. Like, I don't know what catch up or something fell. Yeah, you drop something. Sit down there and like licks the seatbelt constantly.
Starting point is 00:38:07 So I'm like, I always say, what are you fall in love with the seatbelt? And nobody gets it, right? No one gets it. Nobody gets it. Even everybody out there is like, I don't know what you're talking about. But Annie's voice to it. Would you find in love with the wall? You know?
Starting point is 00:38:20 What do you fall in love with the wall or something? Blake's not even laughing. He doesn't know who Adam Sandler is. Not even a pity laugh. Not even a pity laugh. Go on with your confession, Ariel. All right. I made out with a backstreet boy.
Starting point is 00:38:38 Oh! Can I guess which one? Nope. I hope it was Nick. But I feel like it was AJ I wish it was AJ I loved AJ Is it Brian?
Starting point is 00:38:56 So it was Nick? No Kevin? No It was Nick It was Nick Oh it was Nick I did out with Nick Carter
Starting point is 00:39:05 When I was like When I was young in Hollywood You know I got there And I was like oh my God With a battery ball And then I made out with a battery board I wasn't like planning on it I did though
Starting point is 00:39:15 Well of course you were planning. I mean, well, it wasn't like I said out. I wasn't like packing my bags of Hollywood to make out with a backstreet boy. I moved to Hollywood and I found myself amongst Backst Street boys for some reason. At Jennifer Aniston's house. At Jennifer Aniston's house. Yeah. And how
Starting point is 00:39:33 did it happen? Or we can't do details. Oh, I don't get I don't get. Oh, okay. I, no, okay, so we were all out somewhere a bunch of, yeah, shh, shh, this is a good story. Okay, ready? um i was out at nick carter right now yeah could you please just at him oh my god i'm yeah i probably shouldn't tell this sorry yes great who cares this is yeah oh my god put your phone away sir
Starting point is 00:39:59 we need to like put your little phones and little ziplock bags i know trust me i've got myself a lot of trouble you know excuse me it sure isn't but i'm gonna tell this story anyway it's a safe space trust it's safe um no i would went to a club and I was with like a bunch of people that all, you know, he knew. And then we all went back to his house. And then we went on his balcony and he's like, can I kiss you? And I was like, yeah. And then we kissed. And then he literally, not because the kiss, like, we kissed for like a while. Wow. And then he was like, it wasn't, it wasn't like weird. He wasn't weird to me or anything. Sounds weird. It got weird. And he was like, it was like five in the morning and we were sitting on his
Starting point is 00:40:44 balcony talking and then he was like do me order you a car and it's like not a car he ordered me a taxi stop ordered me a taxi and i went home it was great well because i wasn't gonna sleep there he was like you could sleep and i was like mm-mm so he said you want me to order you a car and he got you a cab got me a cab wow not even like a black car no wow no what a dick he was that he was nice but yeah it was like that's yellow that car is yellow what is this i could have got myself one of the Yeah, I could have been a, you know. A limo would have been nice. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:19 What if you just got me a limo? That would be great. That would be such a Nick Carter move. Yeah, no, that's great. Is that good? Yeah. Like, I don't go around telling people that. No, it's great.
Starting point is 00:41:29 I mean, it's no anal, but it's, it's, it's, basically. It's, it's good. Yeah. It's good. Wow. You made it like, kind of cool? Yeah, it's not, it was like a humble brag. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:41 And I'm okay with that kind of brag. It was a really. It was a good confession. Thank you. Thank you. What? Nope. Oh.
Starting point is 00:41:50 I think he's, like, married with babies now, right? Yeah, he is. Yeah. That's true. Yeah. What about Justin Bieber? Does he follow you? No.
Starting point is 00:42:01 Oh. You were Justin Bieber for Halloween, and you nailed it. If you guys... Did you see it? It was so good. I was attracted to myself. On Instagram, you are missing. out. You're my favorite account
Starting point is 00:42:16 to follow on Instagram, and not just because you're my friend. Thank you. The one where you posted the Beyonce window, I'll never get over. And if you don't know what I'm talking about, do you just go look for it? Okay, Justin Bieber's that costume, though, if I go out in that costume, I confuse everybody. Not because I look
Starting point is 00:42:34 like him, because girls are like, you're a girl? Like, oh my God. They're like attracted to you. And then guys are like, you're a girl? And then they're attracted to me? And then just things are so weird. So everybody's just attracted to you, as for usual. No, when I'm Justin Bieber.
Starting point is 00:42:52 I love good. We're going to play a game called Truth or Drink before we wrap up. But I'm pulling up a picture of, oh, Kelsey Ballerini looked great tonight on the red carpet. Just checking her Instagram? Well, because I'm going to pull up a picture of you as Justin Bieber. Okay. We're going to play Truth or Drink. Oh, speaking of The Bachelor people, Wells Adams just.
Starting point is 00:43:14 liked my photo. Wells Adams. It's like the one bachelor thing I know. We were talking to her backstage and Blake was like, yeah, I'm, you know, stage coach. And she was like, I don't know what you're talking about. He was like, what? He's like the one person that doesn't know about stage coach. Everybody knows about this.
Starting point is 00:43:34 All right. So there are shows and films that you like. There are shows and films that you love. And then there are the truly special ones you cannot get enough of. The ones that come around. Once every so often, they take up huge chunks of your time and energy, and you find yourself making like pretty much every conversation about it. Okay, well, I'm Obsessed with This is a podcast about those shows.
Starting point is 00:43:57 So I'm Obsessed with This is hosted by writer and co-host of Who, weekly Bobby Finger. And it isn't just about the biggest titles on Netflix. It's about their top-tier favorites. Every episode features a special guest who has been chosen, a title of their choice, as their current obsession from reality shows to soap operas to movies literally anything that they're loving right now the conversations often move beyond the Netflix title and onto the guests larger more existential obsessions like the episode about tall girl chosen by writer and call your girlfriend co-host anne friedman who spent the conversation discussing what it was like to be
Starting point is 00:44:36 obsessed with her height throughout high school in December they'll be talking about the wonderful world of Netflix holiday content as well as a look back at 2019. And I don't know about you guys, but I'm always having this conversation with people about new shows to watch. So this will be a great podcast. New episodes of I'm obsessed with this are released every Tuesday. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, PocketCass, or wherever you listen to podcasts. We'll be back with more Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow. So have you guys had a chance to listen to for crying out loud? Because if not, you have to check it out For Crying Out Loud is hosted by Adam Carolla's wife, Lynette, and comedy writer Stephanie Wilder, Taylor.
Starting point is 00:45:20 These women are hilarious. Listen in as they share their comedic views on parenting, marriage, and kids. Lynette and Stephanie are honest, silly, and even vulnerable as they discuss their own experiences as wife and mom. You'll feel like you're hanging with your best girlfriends, listen every week on Podcast 1, Apple Podcasts, and many of your favorite podcast listening apps. Now back to Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow Okay I actually haven't looked at the questions yet Because I wanted Blake to read them And I didn't want it to be um
Starting point is 00:45:50 Oh yes I wanted to move under the Mose is one of my favorites Kate you get to choose Who you ask These questions too Oh I feel really nice up here Oh Okay
Starting point is 00:46:05 Oh get it girl All right Blake Truth or drink Jesus Don't do the top one Who comes up with me? Don't do the first one Just kidding
Starting point is 00:46:16 The first one What's the weirdest porn You've ever watched? That's it Don't do the first one Oh I didn't hear you Skip Skip skip
Starting point is 00:46:27 Oh skip That's a question for Skip Skip right there He's so red Look at he's so red We don't want to know the porn that Skip watches We want to know the weirdest
Starting point is 00:46:36 porn Blake's ever watched Skip goes back to Blake We're going back to Blake Skip you are in my hair Way to be here tonight Give it up for Skip he's a legend Skip is perfect Skip
Starting point is 00:46:55 Skip skip skip skip skip skip Skip's a legend Blake weirdest porn you've ever watched Is it bad that to think about it? Like, I feel like I'm going to disappoint. You guys are all like, oh, stagecoach, she's probably weird as f***, but I'm not. You're like, you're like big-titted girls.
Starting point is 00:47:15 That's it. Yeah, it's not weird. No, um... We're all waiting. I feel like I should make an anal joke right now because of... Do it! You're like, wait a second, I recognize you. I mentioned the anal porn.
Starting point is 00:47:33 Oh, shit. I feel like... Wait. Scarlet? That is your name, right? Dang, I'm good. Okay. Yeah, I'm sorry, guys.
Starting point is 00:47:42 Like, I feel like I'm... He just likes basic porn. Yeah, fucking missionary. No, I'm just kidding. That's okay. If it is, if that's what gets to your... I just, yeah. Literally, sorry to disappoint.
Starting point is 00:47:54 Don't look at me. Anyone else want to answer this? Jason? All right, here we go. Next question. Did you drink? What? What?
Starting point is 00:48:04 Yeah. I should drink. I should chug. Right? Chugget. Chaget. Who's single out there tonight? Blake will be at the after party.
Starting point is 00:48:15 I hope you like missionary. All right, Ariel. What's up? Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Ariel. That was all tequila. You're lying. No, that was all tequila. All right.
Starting point is 00:48:31 Full cup, yes, I'm here for you. Here we go. Was that water? It honestly wasn't. That was a thousand percent Tequila ice I saw you pour that You can smell it
Starting point is 00:48:41 That was a tequila Yeah Wow That was a tequila ice Smelled it I smelled it And I'm sweating Smelt it
Starting point is 00:48:48 I think everyone should put Their drink up And have a sip Just for Blake I love vinos You guys are the best Vinoes are amazing You have never disappoint
Starting point is 00:48:58 Ever Look at that thing Here we go Riel Okay What's the most embarrassing photo you have on your phone
Starting point is 00:49:07 And can you show it to the crowd? That's not even fair because I feel like you always share your embarrassing photos. I do, yeah. They're embarrassing and they're all on my Instagram. Follow me on Instagram at Ariel Vanderberg. No, just kidding. I gave you the wrong handle too. It's Ariel.
Starting point is 00:49:24 Yeah, I mean, that's not a good question for me because I do post embarrassing photos. I mean, let me, I'll just like... Choose your audience, Jason. What's, I mean... I just have a lot of selfies. All right, how about, we'll ask you this one. Who's the most inappropriate person you've ever fantasized about? Nick Carter.
Starting point is 00:49:47 Or thing, or thing. No, no. Inappropriate? I fantasize about him all the time. But why would it be inappropriate? Like, um... No, no, no, well, that's, yeah. Like Adam Sandler, as Billy Madison, might be a little inappropriate.
Starting point is 00:50:04 Got it. That's not, though. Or like the kid from Big Daddy Okay, okay, what about That'd be weird But that's super weird Like Ryan Philippe From
Starting point is 00:50:16 Cruel intentions Cruel intentions Where it's like You're my brother You know Like Like I don't have a brother Or anything
Starting point is 00:50:24 So it's fine Yeah But he's not a full-blown brother He's a stepbrother So I get that But like it's not like I was like Oh you're my step brother It's just like him in that movie
Starting point is 00:50:33 Because he's like weird He's like so miss serious in his little black turtleneck. Yeah. And his little, like, hair. Yeah. Do you guys know who that is? Yeah. They're like, yes.
Starting point is 00:50:45 Some of them are young. Oh, yeah, okay. Okay, go. Watch cruel intentions. It's hot. Well, some of you are. Not all of you. Some of you are my age. Some of you are older. I love all of you. Any age you are. Skip. Especially Skip. Skip's getting so much love tonight. I love it.
Starting point is 00:51:01 All right. Caitlin, what is the most embarrassing thing you've ever done to try and become famous. Cleo is getting deep here. I actually think it might have been Madison. Was it Madison? Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:51:18 The most embarrassing thing I'm so excited. I ever did to try and become famous was. A. Kardashian. Wait, first of all, describe famous. Like, to get more followers or something. To get more followers. Yeah. It's kind of a, no, okay.
Starting point is 00:51:37 Well, I mean, going on the bachelor. But you're already famous. I don't know. I'm, I call myself a G-lister. Yeah, yeah. You're a B-lister for the Bachelor. Oh, that's cute. I get it? Sorry.
Starting point is 00:51:49 But it's not right. Everyone hated that. I was like, you're a B-lister. I was like, crickets. Yeah, they didn't, they didn't, it didn't land. Sorry. But the most embarrassing thing I ever did was probably, do you guys know, do you ever, do you know what the buried life is?
Starting point is 00:52:08 You really? Okay, so it was this show on MTV where they crossed 100 things off of their bucket list of what they wanted to do before they die and then on their show on MTV called The Buried Life they help people cross off their things that they wanted to do before they die. And they surprised me
Starting point is 00:52:25 and they put me on the show and they were like, they surprised me at this restaurant I worked at. I had pink eye in both eyes. It was terrible. Why? Yeah. I don't even know how that happens.
Starting point is 00:52:39 I'm apparently farting on the pillow, but I don't know. I had pink eye in both eyes. They came to surprise me, so I had sunglasses on and a fedora because it was that time. And they were like, Caitlin Bristow, we want to help you live out your dream and cross something off your bucket list. And I was like, holy shit, this is happening. Wait, was this like before The Bachelor? Yeah. I was like.
Starting point is 00:52:59 Oh, so this was like. I was like 25. But why did they know who you were? um because i was friends with them no i was i kind of knew a couple of them and i was like please make me famous got it got it got it and so they did but it was so bad so they put me on um they put me they flew me to L.A and i went to an audition to um audition for a um a music video have you guys heard this story before oh okay um and so i went in and they were like this is there was like a table of judges and i walked in with the film crew and they were like
Starting point is 00:53:33 yeah are you Caitlin Bristow your fedora and your pink eye well no I'd healed by then this was they surprised me and then I went to LA got it and so I walked in and all these girls were along the back in Dan's office and they had all just like waited so long for their time and I walked in with a camera crew and they were like oh are you Caitlin Bristow and I was like yeah and they're like go on and they just put me up and so there's all these girls behind me and a table like of judges like in front of me and they're like dance and they played a song and I was like this please dance for us the way you danced that's what you did it was one of my moves I did a whole like hip-hop thing into that and you're a really good dancer you could tell right yes no but like
Starting point is 00:54:25 not many people can just like pull that out of their bag well I mean I hope so because I dance my whole life. But, but, so they were like, you didn't know that about me? I, well, no, like, I knew, but, yeah. Yeah. Cool. And you're a really good singer. Are you a fan of a fucking singer in her whole life? Yes. You're a really good singer and a really good answer. It's so crazy. Yeah. Go on. Well, I, I think the reason why I'm saying that is because I dance my whole life and I can't dance like you. Okay. Just like you can't. It's such a facade. And, so anyway, so anyways, I did it and then I left and then the buried life
Starting point is 00:55:03 definitely did not air that episode and they were like that was stupid you didn't get the audition they like hated us and they replaced my episode with a blind cowboy that wanted to ride a horse makes sense
Starting point is 00:55:16 yeah so anyways I called my mom and I was like this is my chance I am on the buried life and then they cut my whole episode and it was like a big waste of time you should have led with that because I've been Googling
Starting point is 00:55:29 Caitlin Presto on The Barron Live And I can't find it. Yeah, I also did a music video with David Lingwood That was really inappropriate that we had to take off YouTube When I went on the show Because I was scared that people were going to be like, who is this wacko? Really? Yeah, and so that's also why you can't find anything.
Starting point is 00:55:47 We were singing about very weird things. It wasn't inappropriate like that. It was like we were singing things that it's 2019 And it was like, that probably would have been weird. And did a glass just break? Moffled off. Oh, God. Oh, she's a baby got a cry and like, the record skips and, you know, that whole thing when it's, yeah, when it's not funny.
Starting point is 00:56:07 Anyways, and that's my story, back to truth or drink. I was so long. All the VIPs are like, well, we got to go, so I don't need that picture with you. Back to me, Jay, back to me, Jay. Do you want to do this or no? Just a couple more. A couple more, here you go. Blake, what would you say is the most disgusting habit you have?
Starting point is 00:56:28 Oh. And I can fill your drink if you need me to. I do. Do you want this? It was disgusting habit I have. He didn't hear you. More, more, more. You said more.
Starting point is 00:56:55 You asked for it. That's a heavy for. Rosie is my favorite. Sorry, I'm sorry. Got it on your stagecoach boots. I'm not even part of that joke. You can't even make that joke. Do you wear those boots while you were doing things at stagecoach?
Starting point is 00:57:08 I have no idea what I'm talking about. It's clearly working. She still has her fucking napkin on her mic. My hand is sweaty. What is the most disgusting habit? No, disgusting habit. I'm sorry. I wish you were to have these in advance.
Starting point is 00:57:24 I could have made up things. Most disgusting habit. Chug the mug. Chug the mug if you can't think of something. No, I, uh, I, I, I, yeah, see it! No, it's not that stupid. It's not that bad.
Starting point is 00:57:43 They're in college, so. What are you? No, no, no, I bite my toenails. Is that right? You're lying. That's a true story. I did too. My big toe's a motherfucker.
Starting point is 00:58:02 You're really got to like. No, you don't. Yeah, I do. You do not do that. I do. You do that? Yeah. Why would you do that?
Starting point is 00:58:11 Not all the time. Because I have to use a chainsaw otherwise. My big toe nail is like. Just like dumb and dumber? Yeah. Oh, no. What? No, don't do it.
Starting point is 00:58:24 No. Do it. I like you guys, but you guys are. They're freshly trimmed. Okay, two more. One for Ariel, one for me. Go. Oh, no, we need you. One for Jason. Yeah. No, no, no. Let me. Let me. Caitlin, let me.
Starting point is 00:58:41 Okay. I had a whole fucking. I had a couple of Jasons. Okay. All right, Ariel, what is the biggest lie in your life you've ever told? Whoa. That she made out with Nick Carter. No. J.K.
Starting point is 00:59:04 That's really funny. Thanks. I'm just trying to keep up. It's true. The biggest lie I ever told. I, well, God. Oh. Yeah, I can say this one.
Starting point is 00:59:19 Okay. Because I'm an adult now, Mom. My mom found weed in my backpack. and I was like That's not mine And I blamed it on this poor kid That I knew from high school And then he got in trouble
Starting point is 00:59:36 And then at school he was like How did my mom find out? I was like, I don't know And it was my mom Told his mom like He smokes weed And it was my weed And that I got
Starting point is 00:59:49 How old were you? High school? I don't know How old are you in high school? I was zero clue 14 I was probably like 15 or 16
Starting point is 00:59:56 15. Oh, okay. But I had like, first I was like, that's basil. You know? I was like, that's basil and time.
Starting point is 01:00:05 I use it for a whole back. It's basil, time and oregano mixed together. And then my mom was like, no, it's not. It smells like, she called it something like gonga.
Starting point is 01:00:13 She was like, it smells like gonga. And I was like, well, if it's gonger, it's Alex Samuelson's. And then she was like, uh,
Starting point is 01:00:21 wow, I'm going to tell his mom. Yeah. Skip, what do you call? I just call him out. What do you call him out? What do you call him out?
Starting point is 01:00:26 Hashish Merge of Juana Gondja Gondja Yeah Yeah Skip we trust My mom would make
Starting point is 01:00:34 My mom smoked weed My mom Skip Skip Skip Yeah Okay Last one
Starting point is 01:00:40 This is for Jason Michael Tardick Who's the most inappropriate person You've ever fantasized about
Starting point is 01:00:47 What's it I was gonna ask Ryan Phillip Perry Did this Didn't I don't care It's my podcast I can ask you
Starting point is 01:00:54 Whatever I want Nick Carter Nick Carter's become the main topic of this Sorry Nick Hmm Oh god he's gonna tell us And I'm like
Starting point is 01:01:06 I immediately regret asking us You say it inappropriate He's like Princess Jasmine No When I don't The last person Who's the last person? Nala
Starting point is 01:01:15 Nala Sorry Honestly I'm not fantasizing I'm a damn lion Uh Simba's hot Topanga
Starting point is 01:01:25 No I was the first thing that came to my I don't know like the I think my first crush The person I first fantasized in my life about Was can I guess Yes When I was like young young
Starting point is 01:01:37 Is it The girls from the thong song It's like a Simpson No Oh It was it was the pink The pink power ranger Oh
Starting point is 01:01:47 That's a good one That's a really good one I do still freaking hate That Tommy guy Because he would date her I'm like, fuck you, Tommy. My mom's like,
Starting point is 01:01:58 why do you hate the Green Ranger? Everyone loves the Green Ranger. I'm like, I'm like, I don't know. I actually fantasized about the Pink Power Ranger, too. She's so hot. She was a baby.
Starting point is 01:02:06 You guys should be Tommy and Pink Power Ranger. I don't know the girl. Kimberly and... And Tommy. That's a good Halloween costume. You'd be a good Pink Ranger. I was like two years ago,
Starting point is 01:02:18 so I can't do that again. You did? Yeah. We're friends. Yeah, again, we are friends. We are friends. I know nothing about you. I was a pink Power Ranger
Starting point is 01:02:24 and got a little. on stage at a honky tonk in Nashville and sang my tits off. Were you wearing a face mask? Yeah. No. Yeah, it was very muffled. Oh, I love that. You tell them your MySpace name? My MySpace name was Caitlin Bristow aka Tits McGee.
Starting point is 01:02:40 I did know that. Did you guys have fun tonight? Jason's just like trying to catch up with everybody. Does anybody need a little refill? Just a little one. Everybody here...
Starting point is 01:03:00 Actually, you know what? I have to take one serious second. I know... I'm going to still pour, but I would actually like everyone to raise their glasses. I'm not going to name her name just because, I don't know
Starting point is 01:03:10 if they've announced this yet, but a vino and somebody who loved Spade and Sparrows and Scrunchies lost her battle to cancer of two years at 26 years old, and I said that I was going to dedicate this podcast tonight to her.
Starting point is 01:03:23 Oh, my God. So it was awful. I've emailed with her for the last year and a half about just her progress and she's just been an actual light to me. And so I just really wanted to dedicate this podcast to her. So cheers. I don't want to name her name, but cheers to her. And I hope everybody had such a good night.
Starting point is 01:03:45 And I love you guys all so much for coming out tonight. You guys, I'm obsessed with you guys. I'm obsessed with each and everyone. If you don't follow Ariel on Instagram, you are insane. She's my really good friend and a really good follow on Instagram. You guys, I hope you had so much fun tonight. Thanks for listening to Off the Vine with Caitlin Briscoe. Get new episodes every Tuesday exclusively on podcast.com, the Podcast One app, and subscribe on Apple Podcasts.
Starting point is 01:04:22 Who's done with OTV? This week's Off the Vine is sponsored by SertaPet. If you guys are struggling with mental health issues and want to see if you qualify for an ESA, get connected with a therapist online now by heading to surta pet.com slash vine for 15% off your evaluation. LeCroix, enjoy LaCroix Sparkling Water, a healthier alternative for you and your lifestyle. LaCroix Sparkling Water is available nationwide for a full list of retailers. Visit www.lacroiwater.com. I'm obsessed with this.
Starting point is 01:04:53 New episodes of I'm obsessed with this are released every Tuesday. Subscribe now on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, PocketCast, or wherever else you listen to podcasts, and Mercari. Finally, an app that makes you money. Check out Mercari and lighten the low this holiday. That's M-E-R-C-A-R-I, Mercari, the selling app.

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