Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - NaSHEville with Mattie Selecman and Brooke Tometich

Episode Date: December 4, 2018

This week Kaitlyn sits down with the founder of NaSHEville Brooke Tometich and Mattie Selecman. Join in the fun as the ladies explain the mission of their brand, how they serve the community while empowering women, and ways everyone can get involved. Blink - Visit www.BlinkForHome.com/OFFTHEVINE for Peace of mind starting at $99 Brush Hero - Check out BrushHero.com and use code VINE for $20 off orders over $100 See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Okay, let's talk about the original enemies to lovers story. Before all of our reality TV couples, before the rom-coms, we binge, there was Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy in pride and prejudice. And Audible has just dropped a brand new original that will have you completely hooked, I am. It's not just any audiobook. This is a full cast performance. So Marisa Abella, you might know her from industry, brings Elizabeth Bennett to life.

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So whether it's your first time experiencing Pride and Prejudice or you've read it a million times, you're going to fall absolutely in love all over again. So go listen to Pride and Prejudice now at audible.ca slash Jane Austen. Get ready for lots of laughs, tabby topics, on filtered advice, and wine. Lots of wine. Get ready to shake things up. Here's Caitlin. Welcome to Off the Vine. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow.

In the studio today, you may remember her as the Somali. Did I say it right? Nailed it. Yes. From a grape therapy episode, Maddie Selectman, who is now retired from wine? I'm retired from my first wine career. Now I'm just a regular old snobby drinker. Which is why I'm serving you the crappy red today and her friend Brooke Tomatech.

Nailed it. That's good. You got it. No, it's good. I panicked. You did. I saw you. I was like, T.

Tom, Tom, Tometetch. And together, they started. Now is it Nashiville. See, I'm always so paranoid about high, because I think it's like I don't want to insult somebody. So I'm always so paranoid about how I pronounce it just because I want to make it right. Anyways, Nashieville. Nashivville. Nashyville.

like that nashyville a lifestyle brand and apparel company that gives back to orphans widows and trafficked women in middle Tennessee such an amazing organization that you guys have created

thank you good for you and thank you so much for coming on the podcast today and for just doing what you do and I just wanted to start by maybe you guys giving us a little background

on just who you are absolutely yeah we're psyched I'm psyched to be back and you're always welcome back all right well just have to start a new company and another new company and retire.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Just keep me on my toes. I'll have multiple retirements. Keep it interesting for me. Well, I'll let Brooke speak on it first and kind of tell you a little bit about her. This was her brainchild, and then I piggybacked on with her

after my, after Salt and Vine, finished, which we're all still crying about. But the good news is, I know, I am too. The bottle shop that's there is going to reopen. The sweet, wonderful man, who was my GM for so long, got the new folks to sublee some space.

So we can still have fabulous wine in West Nashville. Oh, I mean, Okay, good news. Plug for the wine shop. Well, yeah. Plug it all day, sister. Plug it all day.

I'm like, go on if you want to. Yeah. Let's keep talking about that. Keep going. Okay, so I guess this started kind of I was at this crossroads in my life where I had been a hairstylist and I ended up realizing the thing I love the most about that was that people get super vulnerable when they sit in your chair. They really do. Think about it. What you tell your hairstylist and you're a bartender.

You are. Bartenders and hairstallists and your therapist. And, you know, sometimes. you're just like, I can't believe they open up about that. And I got so excited to go and just listen to these women and just all of their problems. But the bad thing about that is I'd never let them pay me at the end. Because we go my gosh, you're going through that. So we'd come up and Jake's like, you're actually losing money doing hair now. So if you want to be a counselor, go get your PhD. You're a little sweetheart. That's so cute. Yeah, it's bad. So I got introduced

to a marketing company from hairstyling. And I ended up about six years in. I've been leading a team of 20,000 women. Wow. Yes. Powerful. Casual. It's part-time. Yeah.

It really landed in my lap from one of my clients. And so I love that and it really is fulfilling, but I've realized what I love even more than the products I'm marketing is the stories of all of these women and just the relationships and the connections. So basically the biggest part of my existence, I feel like, is we actually adopted a little girl. Oh, wow. Yes.

And going through the adoption process. just wrecked me in just an unexplainable way and I just can't ever live my life with my eyes closed ever again to it. And so I just started feeling so unfulfilled and like I was just not stepping into my true calling. So I just started thinking, what is something that every single day if I woke up no matter what mood I'm in, I would want to do. And it has to do with women and advocating for adoption. And so the word that kept on being laid on my heart was she. And I'm like, What? Okay. I can't just name something she and I don't even know what that is or what I'm going to do. Right. And so our birth mom actually was 17 and I just fell in love with that age group, 16 and 17 year olds. I mean, I'm like if somebody would have interjected in my life at 16. Oh my gosh. It would have saved me a whole lot of 100%. Yeah. And so I didn't know if that was a physical building that she could come into from every age. I didn't know, but I knew that I just wanted to make a life of just pouring into women. And so,

Oh, my God, I'm so in love with you right now. I love this. I'm like, wow. Yeah. And so that 17-year-old birth mom, you know, just I started working with all the teens in my church. And we have a huge youth group. And just, I loved it. And I'm like, I just want a place that y'all can come, whether it's physical, online, anything.

And you can be poured into by just incredible women that are stepping into their callings, even if they're falling flat on their face. It's really important for y'all to learn about failing. So I just loved the connectivity of all the stories. I'm like, let's highlight that. let's take it a step farther and let's be friends. Let's be nice to each other and let's be vulnerable. Right. And so through that, I just started researching, you know, what kind of need there is.

And I was like, well, there really needs to be something that really calls at Aesia 117, which means you take care of widows and orphans and just the fatherless and, you know, just anybody that's been oppressed. So I didn't really know where to go from there. And so I came up with the word Nashyville because I'm a unicorn, as we like to call ourselves. We both are Nashville natives. Super National natives, super rare. Very rare. And so playing a little airing about it, I have to confess. So anyone that we're offending, oh, we're actually from Nashville.

My sincerest apology, please forgive us. But we just love what we're from. It used to be a curse, but now it's so cool. It is. You're so, like, original. Yeah. Yeah. It's so fun.

The cool thing about Nashville and the project is there's so many people now who feel a part in Nashville, and this is a way that you can stand side by side. Unicorns and invaders. Right. I love that. Yes. So I came up with this word and I'm like, I don't know what to do now. And so one of my good friends said, hey, there's this guy.

Shout out to implement now. He has this great manufacturing company. He'll tell you if this is a flop. Just go tell him the word. So sit down and tell him about it. He's like, this is brilliant. You got to start a blog. And the second he said that, it's like all of my dreams just deflated.

And I was like, okay, well, there goes that. And I'm like, because I would rather have my finger slammed in a car door than right. I am right there with you I can't I don't want to do it and so I call my best friend I'm like well there goes that he wants me write a blog

and she's like okay Maddie actually feels like she's being called into ministry and writing full time why don't she just go have coffee with her so enter the word nerd yes I'm like well we'll just see if we can pick her brain

yeah that's a secret about me it seems to surprise people I guess I always just my degree's creative writing you know I mean obviously I've been told it runs in my family Yes. For those who don't know, well, I think we said that on the last podcast, that your dad's Alan Jackson. I think we did.

Yeah. Yeah. So runs in the fam. He can have another shout out, though. I'll always give him a little. Yeah, I'll always give him a shout out. So, yeah, I'd always love, obviously grew up in that environment and went to school, University of Tennessee, and actually got a degree in creative writing specifically, which is cool. They have actually one of the best programs in the country for it.

Oh, wow. And one thing I love about my dad is I graduate, I'm 22, whatever, I'm all fired up. Like, I'm going to be the next, like, Nicholas Sparks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And which would make my mom so infinitely happy. She's like, just like write romance novels. And I was like, I just can't. It's just flat.

I just can't. So, yeah, he told me after school, he said, you've got a gift. You're a great writer, but you're 22, and you haven't lived life. You've nothing to write about. Go figure it out. So I moved to Austin, rational choice. and thus fell in love with wine in the last seven years of my life

but I don't even know where I started talking about any of this Oh, interward nerd Yes, sorry I was like visioning all of my craziness in Austin and wishing I was there because it's like 20 degrees here right now I know and I love Austin

I love it so much Yeah it's just there's a raw and realness to Austin Absolutely I think is is almost becoming more the vibe in Nashville now I think because we have people coming in Absolutely. It's a little less stiff.

Anyway, shout out to Austin. Yeah, shout out. But yes, I just went there and fell in love with wine and that kind of like Brooke with the hairstyle. It's to find a passion that young in life is really amazing. And I think a lot of what in retrospect I really loved about wine besides it's delicious and it makes you feel good was the stories behind it. Same thing.

Like there's always a history. There's always a culture. There's always some sort of struggle that someone overcame. And it's just like this palpable. product of their productivity and their purpose and their perseverance and then you get to then share that with people right it brings you together and um so i always enjoyed telling the stories of those things and so when time and place um brought salt and vine to conclusion which you know is a is a grief and a relief at the same time you know it's it's it opened a new window to my life

and an amazing summer um just of relaxation and restoration and and all that but anyway when she called And salt and vine was for people who don't know, a wine bar restaurant in Nashville. That is amazing. So I went into my quote unquote retirement from wine at 28. I was looking forward to relaxing summer. We got a little puppy. Two weeks later, Brooke calls and shatters all my dreams of peaceful retirement and gives me this amazing project to jump on with. And yeah, as she said, a mutual friend connected us.

And I had just felt with a lot of the struggle and the fate of the restaurant really, realized you know what this is a beautiful chapter I've learned more about myself and what I can persevere and do but my gift is words and I worked with almost an all-female staff there and just found the strength and the unity that you can find when you really aren't afraid to look at the woman next to you and be like you're not my competition like you're my sister and we can do all of this together like I love that yeah and so I just I felt that so strongly and I think that was such the purpose for that phase of my life And so when she called, you know, I had already kind of grappled with the idea, okay, I want to ride, I want to speak, I want to help women. And she said, and we're going to give back to orphans.

And like she said, we both are strong in our faith. And we went to the scripture. You see over and over whenever they say take care of orphans, take care of widows. So we're like, okay, God said that's what we're supposed to do. It's good enough for me. Yeah, right. So I kind of signed on. And I just said, look, I want to help you write the blog.

I'm not a salesperson. I am not a fashion person. but I love to tell stories and the way to really sell a purpose and sell a mission is to tell the stories of the women behind it because that's that's the truth of what we all seek after like we said is vulnerability and connectivity and I said so give me a little bit we'll get a podcast going stay tuned we will have that going I love that you guys are going to do a podcast quarter next year yeah and I said let's just find awesome women in Nashville that are running businesses or nonprofits or helping people are just overcoming just the craft that we go through and being open about it. So I said, we'll create that community. And then through the merchandise, through all the Nashyville stuff, celebrate a city that's awesome, full of women who are kicking butt, and give back to these missions. And we added on our third mission is trafficked women, which she referred to earlier.

And I think it's kind of a hushed but pervasive issue. Yes. We have a lot of, I'm learning, we're learning, a lot of misconceptions of. about how it really happens and there's an amazing organization here called In Slavery, Middle Tennessee, and it was kind of the pioneer, the CEO, Derry, is she'll be on our blog in a couple weeks. She's like superwoman with the softest smile. I've never met a lady.

She just, she's like, you could tell she could move a mountain and, like, not break a sweat or say a curse word. She just like is, I don't know. I said, I wish somebody described me that. That was powerful. She's eaten the right wea. I don't know what they are. But yeah, so we decided, I signed on with Brooke in July.

And so we had these missions. And again, we felt very convicted that this was the way I was supposed to go, even though I was, you know, as a brand new startup. And swore to myself, I would never start another business again. But here I am. But when there's passion involved. And I love that it was like a pivot for you in a new direction. And I love your attitude through it because a lot of people would really, um, focus like negatively on oh why did this fail or why did this happen or why did like yeah but you

saw it as a learning opportunity and like a springboard into your next destination and where you're supposed to be yeah I think that's a it's a very very hard lesson um to learn and that was something that excuse me my parents really reiterated with us and walked out for us um regularly as kids is like your life will be a book right there's chapters And just because one ends never means it's a failure. And so, I mean, it's so hard. It's so easy to say that, but it's so hard, especially for women, because we have this. We're going to get it right.

Like, we're going to polish it. But no, it was a beautiful chapter. And so many of the people who supported me and were there for me in that chapter have just embraced Nashville and donated stuff to our launch party. And just that's sort of what our goal is here is to create that connectivity and community that's just, I got your back, you got mine. You know what, it's, it is incredible what happens when a group of women come together. It's just like nothing I've ever seen. And same thing with like the breakup that I'm going through, went through, going through, whatever. Same thing as that is I'm trying to look at it as like such a like learning lesson and what I learned from it and having no regrets.

And just like I'm going through it very publicly, obviously, too. and to have the women that reach out to me, it's like my heart is so warm because I think like at first I was scared to go through it publicly because I was like this is like people are invested in the relationship. They really like said that oh like your guy's relationship inspires me and all of a sudden I'm feeling like here I am another failed bachelor relationship. And so I thought people were going to be disappointed. So I still wanted to share with obviously my listeners and with everybody like what I'm going through because I'm a very open person. with being vulnerable and my feelings and that's just who I am and I was like I'm not looking for attention. I'm kind of looking to like share my experience and how I'm going to like stay strong and get through this and keep going. And the amount of like direct messages or responses

I'm getting from from women just like with support is blowing my mind. But that just says, you know, like the women with the good hearts and like just just the power they have in their words and support is I mean it means everything to me. And I'm sure you both. and say the same thing. Yeah, I mean, that's, it's, it's tremendous. And I think the, Bravo to you, because it is, it's, it is a scary step to be vulnerable with anyone, but especially on a, on a public platform like that. But, you know, it's what we've kind of found out.

And in my very personal experience, my, which listeners, my husband of a year passed away very suddenly in September. And it was about three weeks before our first anniversary. just we were in Florida slipped trying to help a lady up onto a boat and it had rained and you know in your first inclination with any pain regardless which I've I've come to really realize pain is the only non-exclusive emotion that it doesn't care who you are what you look like how old you are everybody's going to feel it and so I think especially when you have an opportunity you know to step up and and be the captain and just say look we're getting our butts kicked here but

we're all feeling it. And I'm going to be the one that's not going to give you this perfect Instagram photo of how strong I am. I'm going to tell you that, like, I drink whiskey for breakfast. Right. Right. Right. I had to leave a meeting to go cry and come back in. Yes. You know, because all of us want to have this static photo of us surviving and conquering. But I think I think the conquering in this and the victory is in saying, look, I need you to hold my hand to get through this. I don't need to like stand on top of it. I just need to walk right through it and that's a lot of what we want to do because as women I mean as people but as women we we all feel this vulnerability and void when we can't live up to whatever picture we want to live up to

right and I think the beauty in that is not living up to the picture but realizing like your picture is going to change in different phases of your life and we can help each other you know smooth out the edges as we go because some of us are going to be on mountaintops when others are in valleys and it's just, you know, it's, you can't, you can't identify with someone if you're not fully honest. And I think feeling identified in the broken places we are is the only thing that really heals. That's so true. I could listen to you talk all day. I'm sorry, that was a bit of soapbox.

It's because she gave me the wine. No, that's like, I mean, I just, I wish every woman in the world could, like, listen to this. So I'm sure you've heard me talk about Blink before because I am pretty obsessed. Blink is an ultra-affordable, 100% wire-free home security camera, which is really convenient because I put a lot of work into getting my home to look just so, and the last thing I need are a bunch of ugly wires hanging across my walls, plus it means that you can place them anywhere around the house inside or out. The blink camera runs on only two double-A batteries for up to two years, and it's also convenient since I'm terrible at changing batteries.

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what's going on in your home right as it happens and if you just want to make sure your kids are at home safe or you want to keep an eye on the pets blink does it all plus the setup is so simple i had zero trouble doing it all by myself from downloading the app to onboarding the sync module and adding the cameras this entire process should only take five minutes or less so to get yours go to blink for home dot com slash off the vine now one more time that's blinkforhome dot com slash off the vine I think that's why I get so discouraged and sad and hurt when there's mean comments and the trolls and the women tearing me down. It's because I'm like, do you don't realize the power that you have for even your own happiness or how easy you could make things on yourself and how you could feel good if you just opened your heart to being like, you know, like a supportive, like building other people up. And it's because I never take things personally that's like one thing I really try to not do in life is take things personally from anyone at any time.

but that's the part that hurts me is when I see these messages, I'm disappointed in somebody who chooses those words to speak to other women. And I just feel like, I'm like, oh, you don't realize the power that you have as a woman to just, like, build each other up and have that confidence within yourself to do so. And I just want to, like, help them and talk to them. And like, sometimes I want to have trolls on my podcast. Just to be like, like, where does this stem from and how can I help and what can we do to change this? Yes. Like, I would think that would be so fascinating. And it's like the corny hairstylist counselor coming out of me, but it's, you know, hurt people, hurt people. And I think those people, they've never had somebody that was a trailblazer in their life that said, listen, I'm going through something that sucks and is not perfect Instagram worthy. But I need you to learn through it because there's got to be a reason why I went through it and I don't want it to be in vain. And we're very big about beauty from the ashes. And I love that. I think, you know, even with our adoption, it was the hardest thing I've ever gone through. we almost lost our daughter, just through crazy legal battles.

It's just such a broken system. Yeah. And we could have stayed quiet about it, but instead it's just you have to just bring something to the forefront that inspires people and learn from your mistakes. I mean, what's the point of us going through a mistake? That's what I tell my teens too. I'm like, listen, I've worn the T-shirt. I've been there.

Everything you're going through right now. Because they always feel alone, too. Yes. And I would have had somebody like as cool as me telling you, you know. I'm telling you, if you were in my life when I was 16, that's the same thing. Like, I think about that too. I'm like, I wish I had, I mean, sometimes I wish I had younger girls following me. Sometimes I'm like, maybe I'm a little inappropriate and like drinking too much wine.

But, you know, like, because I wish that I had some sort of person to look up to that said, like, hey, you don't have to like look like this or be like this or being you is like the best thing you could possibly do for yourself is just be yourself. And I wish that I had that to look up to because when I was 16 and 17, you know, there wasn't social media, but there was still. magazines how to look this way how to be good in bed how to make guys like you how to do like we still have cosmopolitan boom 17 please don't sue us but it's true that the you know I've said it before and all the headlines and everything it's just so sad and and that's what you know and when you're 16 and 17 I always say too like these are such fragile years that you're being molded into like the woman that you can be and imagine having the support system and imagine using Instagram now and these social media platforms that we have to like be raw and be vulnerable

and still post the pretty pictures and still have like the highlight reel but also share like vulnerable moments of pain and what we're going through and how we're going to get through it and having the support of everyone just being like and I'm here for you and I've gone through this because when you do open up and when you do show that vulnerability I was going to say weakness not weakness my I always say that my um my like softness is my strength absolutely And like when you do do that, the amount of people that will come forward and say that same thing that they're going through and that it helped them, I mean, that's just enough right there for, that's why that's why I love podcasting. Like just having all the women that are just formed support groups and have meetups and listen and we all relate together and we all share stories and it's just incredible. It's amen.

I mean, preach it. That's what we're, that's what we're here for. And, you know, I actually, we, I put. something out on our blog after last week and the holidays, because, you know, they're really, you know, they're really difficult for me right now. And I just, I had this realization and it, maybe this is my confession. I love laser tag, Laser Quest. I know this is not the time for confessions. Oh, you can confess any time in the podcast. It doesn't matter. And there's like this very old one on Second Avenue downtown that's just tucked away behind all the bars and it's just

fabulous. Like I went to a men and black themed birthday party there may be in first grade. Oh, I thought you were going to say recently and I was about to bow down to you last year. Anyway, full circle on that confession, but it took me like blundering through there with my little cousins who are precious recently to just like get out all this aggression that like, you know when you play it's like you're just in this frenzy where you just, oh, I have to get this and this. And every time you see a light, you zap. Yep. Half the time you end up shooting the people on your team because you can't see. So I had this realization like how many times do we shoot the wrong target? Like we're just shooting in the dark because we're angry or we're scared or we're broken and like, yes, the pain is just.

your adversary and yes the person who hurt you is your adversary but like really what we have to shoot is exactly what you just said it's isolation because when you're floundering in the dark by yourself you're never going to hit the right target and so it's just like taking that step in being vulnerable is breaking that isolation and embracing the fact that I don't have to fight this in the dark by myself yeah I can fight this in the light with awesome women next to me who've gone through the same thing yeah you know that's not asking someone to come in and fix your problem it's asking someone to come in and hold your hand while you cry until your problem goes away because everybody will need that at some point absolutely at different points in your life

and and and I can think I think we we can all probably agree that everything that we've gone through or gotten through we've looked back and said oh that's why yes every time and you wouldn't change it ever no never when you're going through it it's horrible but yeah I would never change it it is all And that's what, you know, when people go through hard times and that you just don't see light at the end of the tunnel. And it's just like, you just want to shake people and be like, trust me. Like you will realize and you will understand. I think that's what's getting me through a breakup too. It's just like knowing my life experiences and knowing I will one day look back on it and understand why.

Just that alone can help anyone through a dark time. And sometimes, obviously, situations are harder than others. But like, no matter what you go through, you can, you can. you can have just that thought of knowing that things will get better. Well, just having faith in the recovery and knowing that that's not normally a quick thing. And I was going to say, and I think understanding that time is what heals too and knowing that and feeling your feelings through that process of healing and understanding why and again, learning from it because I think a lot of people just want things to be better and they want

to be better now. And then they go to Instagram and they see everybody else being happy. and you know like it's just that nasty circle where if you can just if you can just like go through like I always sometimes I say go hour by hour some days oh gosh yeah you know like yeah it's it's hour by hour for anything and anything hard you're going through and and just I always say to feel your feelings because one of my girlfriends she she was messaging me saying like oh I'm so sorry I'm crying and like I'm so sorry and she felt bad for like being upset and I'm like I am here for you and you are I'm going to do the same to you in like probably two days yep and you need to just

feel your feelings right now because that's part of the healing and it's not a bad thing but that's what we're really fired up with Nashville as a company because you know the business structure is simple right we make these cool clothes merchandise items we wear them we rock them together and we give back to our three missions but a lot of what the purpose for for us women who maybe don't fall in those circumstances is exactly everything we're discussing is like there can be an open, honest platform that like we carry each other up, we carry each other through, and we actually find strength in being, as you said, not weak, but vulnerable together. And we really want to do that on a level that's inclusive to all women who want to step up

and speak. And ideally, again, next year, like, we just launched a month ago, so we're like in stabilizing them. You know, we want to have events. She's in the city and bring the shoes together and have live podcasts around tables and have people tell you who have gone through and who have not even completed because it's ongoing, but walked through that sort of a healing process that time only allows that they can see where you're going to end up when you can't see it when you're right in the middle of it and just have people come together and be vulnerable and drink champagne and buy clothes that give back to help women who can't help themselves. Yeah. And we don't want to just write checks. We want to actually be the hands and feet. We want to create community where people come and do this. And I think, too, just knowing because, again, my weakness so much is everything that's her strengths. We need each other. So this is a dream come true for both of us because I can just create cute clothes and have fun and do kind of more of the marketing stuff that I enjoy. And she can do all the stuff that's tedious to me, but that brings life to her. Well, and plus with your two hearts together. That's just like the real backbone there, your heart and soul into it. too. And I wanted to know what inspired you to take the direction of an apparel company.

I mean, honestly, I wish we could even say, I just knew I wanted somebody to wear a movement and I wanted to create conversation and what is more of a walking billboard than these people in Nashville, you know, whether it's the Bachelorette parties that are here or whether it's people that are born and raised here or people that just moved here. That's one thing we all have in common is we're all going to be wearing t-shirts. We're all going to be wearing hats on those days. We're rolling out of bed. And so many people walk to us a nap. What is that, Nashy? And it's just the perfect conversation.

Absolutely. That's so true. I like that, actually, a walking billboard. That is so smart. And then you can get people wearing it on social media and get that conversation going. And do you guys have a social media page? Mainly right now it's Instagram. That's what we're working off of the most.

We do have at Facebook. I do not even know how to turn Twitter on. That probably makes me sound on. I don't know. I don't Twitter. Yeah, because I'm like, where can people like, you know, go to support? Well, Nashyville right now on Instagram, it's with an understanding. because there's some guy that just misspelled Nashville. He's misspelled Nashville.

And so we're working on that. Nashyville underscore. But our website is just www.com. And that's where our blog that I think is just going to give so much life to people that Maddie writes. And that's where you can locate it right now. And right now there's Dolly Parton with Star Wars laser fingers from her blog post. She talked about today. And then we're also there. We're doing featured cheese where we're taking different women business. owners and just showing kind of what their struggles were and their favorite spots in town. I think that's the most exciting thing. Where in the world do you pick to hang out in Nashville anymore? Right. So just, you know, people being able to shout out their different community spots. I just look. I just feel like so many places lack a sense of like community these days

where like the giving back and I just especially with so many people I guess in the world that I'm in with social media and reality stars and I'm like, why aren't you doing more? I understand that you can only do so much. But like, I just, I see some people on their Instagram and I'm like, that's great, but like mix in something where you're giving back or mix in something that makes people feel good. Well, what I love to about the company and the concept is that, you know, I think there's this kind of antiquated association with giving back or nonprofits or serving being just laboring or heavy or like you have to go build a house or you have to just expense something that feels more like a burden and you hate to say that but it is sort of the association and when

burg approached me I was like this is it like all we have to do is wear this cute stuff and we're gonna help orphans and widows and trafficked women like that's freaking easy and it's you know you just put it on and you go out in the community and you be the walking billboard and you be kind to people and you literally will give those resources back to someone who doesn't have them and imagine if everybody just did one thing like that like I just toot my own horn right now but I did a sleep out for the Covenant House where in Vancouver you sleep outside for homeless youth to just like bring awareness and raise money for that community and you sleep outside from 1030 in the morning to 6 a.m. with a piece of cardboard and a sleeping bag and you you know you're not pretending to be

homeless you're just you're you're just like again raising awareness or putting yourself in their shoes for one night to see and and to to um be able to show them that you care and it was just I this is my third year doing it and it was like I mean just as simple something as to like just you know putting an Instagram story out there so then I'm going to Iceland in a couple days oh which I'm so jealous yeah and so this company sent me all these warm jackets like expensive nice warm jackets and I was just opening them being like oh my gosh they're so cute and stylish I'm like putting them on and I'm like Instagramming about it and then I was like wait a second I just did a sleep out like how easy would it be if I just said, hey, you just gave me, like, five jackets?

Like, could you give five to the Covenant House in Vancouver? Right. And so I just direct message them and I said, I'm feeling a little guilty. I'm very grateful, but I'm feeling a little guilty. Could you send some jackets to the Covenant House? And no problem. Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, my God. So easy. Yes. And you were the connection. I mean, that's so important, too, to be the connection for all of these different things in need because people don't know what they don't know. Yeah, exactly. And it's hard to even research all the needs there are. So when there are people connecting, it makes a huge difference.

And that's why I find it so rewarding to have this podcast, too, because I can have women like you two on to spread this kind of message and this word. And I know the kind of listeners that I have and I know people are going to be so moved by this and then want to be on board. You know, like, same thing. I did a podcast with the Kind campaign. And they're like two women that go around to different schools to promote kindness and like how beautiful it is when women kind. together same kind you should look them up it's absolutely incredible um i've actually i'm gonna partner with them for a scrunchy launch because i started my own scrunchy brand i love it that is i brought you guys oh yeah they're for you guys and uh it's it's it's just like i absolutely love

what they do maybe we need to do a nashyville collab done done i love that that would be great because yeah it's just all about having the conversation and having a platform to share that and and just like bringing awareness and bringing women together. I just think it's like such a beautiful thing. Hey, guys, are you looking for a key to a happy relationship? Yes. How about some good old fashion communication, am I right? Especially in the bedroom.

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Make sure to hang around at the end of this podcast for the latest breaking headlines on the AP News Minute. Hey, guys, it's Jack Vannick from the Lady Gang, and I am sitting here with true crime TV producer and my best friend, Alexis Linkletter, and we are so excited that we are finally launching our true crime podcast called The First Degree right here on Podcast 1. And each week, we are going to bring you the craziest true crime stories and talk to the people who are one degree away from each of these crazy events. And we've dragged crime journalist Billy Jensen along for the ride. And he can't get rid of us. Join us on the first degree every Wednesday on podcast.1.com and the PC1 app. Also remember to rate and review. You're listening to Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristol.

And I know that your job is probably so rewarding. But like what are the hardest parts about working in that industry? I mean, right now I think it's just taking it home with us every day. You know, I mean, I'm sitting with my family trying to. of dinner. And there's just all these things that break your heart that you want to be on 24-7 bored with just talking about. And, you know, last night, I'm having to go away from my phone. And I'm like, sorry, babe. I know you've got both kids, but I've got to handle this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I think that's important, too. I think, like you said, the homeless,

they're not forgetting about the fact that they're freezing when you have cute Instagram codes. Like, I think God wants us to have our heart constantly broken, but he wants a call to action too, which is what we're doing. So I think that's, for us right now is just trying to to distill and kind of stay on board with the three things we have because we want to do everything. Of course. So that is difficult. And I hate to even say this is a difficult part because it's a huge blessing. But we just have had, you know, in a month an outpouring of people.

How can we help? What can we do? And trying to sort of facilitate a way that besides purchasing, you know, the products and sharing on socials and things like that, creating a platform for people to really step up and serve because, you know, the missions we give back to you are difficult in that fashion in that, you know, modern Widows Club, for example, is our partnership for the widows. And it's a national nonprofit and they're launching their Nashville chapter in January. But unless, you know, you have a call from somebody who needs, a woman needs you to come help fix their house or something like that, it's, it is kind of a financial, that's financially, is what, why can't I speak? What is in this? Why? Why can't you speak? You're like, you're like the most well-spoken person. I know. Her ramblings are like my best day. I'm like, I am awesome. I'm not even there. I'm not even there. What I'm trying to say is that right now the majority of what our missions do need is financing. But the biggest struggle for for me is, you know, with the trafficked

women, that's obviously something that, you know, Brooke went through the adoption and I've lost my husband and it's that's the only thing that we haven't personally walked through thank god but you know and i mentioned dairy i've talked a lot with her at length and i think my biggest sort of a goal right now is to really be able to not even advocate for him or just tell the truth about those situations because it's a hard scary world to navigate like we don't feel comfortable with it we're fearful of it there's so much shame associated with it even though 99% of those women did not choose to be in that position. And I just, I feel like that is sort of very heavy on my heart because those are women who, they're just, God bless them, I don't know if they've seen a light

at the end of the tunnel since they were kids, you know. Right. And so, but that's challenging in it of itself because it's not like, it's not like you can go down there and just hang out with them like you can go down and serve at the food bank, you know, because it's such a psychological trauma. But I will just share this just because I was mind blown with it. We, um, went to there's a four-hour kind of meeting called Grace Empower that is offered to women who do get picked up kind of in lieu of having to go to court for a charge and it educates them on ways to get out or be safe essentially like when you do a class to expunge a speeding ticket but it's amazing and it goes to the district attorney's office which was the program that my husband ran and we went in there to see because I just said exactly like you said you got to just walk with somebody and that's the kindest thing you can do for them yes and we sat in a circle with 15ish women and who had been trafficked and some looked very homeless and one, you know, some looked like they could have worked at the bank down the street. I mean, and you just, and we sat there in that circle and this was really right in the wake

of Ben passing in, you just look at the women and I had the strongest conviction I've ever had that, like, nobody gets out of this unscathed. And like, as I sit here with my, you know, jewelry and my purse and I'm going to go get in my cozy car, it's like when we walk through pain, we all feel something similar and empty and achy on the inside. And if you can just look at one of those women the way all these kind, kind women have poured out and given me condolence and love and hugs, like, you have no idea how that could change their life, just sitting. And I think it keeps them in that cycle because they're so used to being looked at and looked down on. And all I want to do is grab their hands

and look them in the eyes and say, I see you. We love you. We're here for you. And that could change their whole entire life. Yes. And they're not used to that. They've never been told that. And that's they probably want. We all are humans at the end of the day who just crave love. And that's all these women need. And I think you're right. It's just like walking through something with somebody and having that empathy and compassion and saying that you see them. And I think that's the most important thing that you can do. Yeah. And I think we all think of taken like that movie. And we just all have this such distortive view of and it's somebody that you're walking past in Target. Right. Right. Once we were really in it and we were sitting in the circle with

these people, it was the most eye-opening thing I think I've ever done in my life. Yeah. And just our simple call to action after that, of course, I can't write. So I went straight to Facebook Live to just kind of talk about my experience. Right. I had probably 20 people messaging me saying, what can we do? Can we bring food to them? And they want to do something.

Yeah. Yeah. So again, it's just the power of conversation and putting yourself through something with somebody to see not, again, like I said with the homeless, like it's not like you're pretending to be them. It's just that you're there listening to them and trying to have that compassion for them and what they are going through and understanding it. And what direction do you guys see in Nashville going? What are the long-term plans?

And also, how can I help? I think right now, you know, we started in Nashiville just because we're both from Nashville, but we've already gone ahead and launched Tennessee. Oh, Tennessee. We're both UT. God, I love you guys. So we did that. We've got a lot of other ones on our head. We just launched Smashyville for all of our Preds fans.

You guys are good. Yeah, so we've got a lot of things like that. And so we would love to take this international. We know we need to kind of focus on this first because this is what we know. But we want to find other women that want to join forces with us and take it everywhere. And we would just love to obviously launch our podcasts and just reach a wider audience. But we would love to be able to just create a huge community of our she's in the city, kind of like our sex in the city symbol. I love that.

have it be a huge community of people that just changes the way that women look at each other. Yeah, absolutely. I think a big thing, too, I mean, to support us especially early on, obviously besides buying the clothes at nashyville.com, is just to reach out to us. Like, Brooke is super active and does all our social media. And I do all the rest of the communications. If you email, don't email Brooke, email me. Hate emails.

Okay. Is the email on the website? Yeah, we just have a. at hey girl at nashyville.com. Love it. And it'll come to us. But, you know, reach out and tell us your stories because that's seriously what we want to do is we want to tell your truth and tell your narrative so that other people step up and tell

theirs. And if you can, you know, supply resources when we do these events, like if you are a fitness specialist or if you are a financial advice, you know, we want to educate and just have women learn skill sets that they didn't learn before and just empower themselves through knowledge and so if you have that or or you are still in the wine and food business and want to give us some wine or food to the grace and power meetings you know we just want people anything as small as small or large as you can contribute we assure you you'll see where it's going in it is there any way men can get involved that's what work because her dad too is like what do

we have and my husband right right right yeah we're gonna definitely because not we don't ever want get political, but we just strongly feel like you don't have to step on men to make women rise. And we think that they're both very needed and very important. And we respect and love them. And our biggest cheerleaders. My gosh. Yes. That's the thing too, right? Men are really better cheerleaders than they are workers. Sorry, guys. Yeah. A lot of them can be. Yeah. No, it's true. It's true. So we do want to create something for them because we want their wives and their, you know, sisters and their daughters. We want them to be proud that they're involved with this. Yeah, exactly. And so we're working on that. I love a lot of things you guys. I love a lot of things you guys.

I say on your website with like, you know, not, I don't want to word it wrong. So I'm just going to say people to go to your website. Just with like your woman empowerment and, and how it's not just like we, you know, it's like you said, we don't have to stomp on men to rise. You know, I totally love that you said that. A lot of things you guys, I was reading your website and I'm like, this is, I mean, it's just beautiful. And I love it. So thank you guys because I mean, I'm excited. Thank you. I mean, I love doing, you know, the fun. funny Bachelor reality stars podcast but this stuff I'm like I mean you can probably just hear it my voice like I just I just love when people can use what they have and and try and

change the world for a better place so thank you guys think the world is craving honesty and we're going to try very very hard to be that with you and I knew what I love is thinking about the next generation because I think right now and who we are and what we're doing and the conversations that we're all having is going to have such an impact, obviously, on the next generation. And I'm just like, I tell myself, because it's a scary world we live in,

but I tell myself that all these things that we're doing now will change the world. Yes. And what we teach our kids and how we spread our message will impact, obviously, when that turnaround happens. Hey, guys, I'm just going to take a second

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when you use the code vine at checkout. Holidays handled. Go visit brushhero.com and don't forget to use your coupon code vine. I feel really weird transitioning into confessions right now. I already gave one. I'll give another.

Yeah, but your confession was like a beautiful like analogy as well. Like it was like I love laser tag but let me tell you why. And then I was like wow. Like it was like moving. I can really bring down a room. I mean, no, you insert. You inspire a room.

You inspire a room. Let me just say before we get into that, is there anything else you want people to know? Or besides like the website and the blog and the Instagram and I'm going to rock my swag over here so hard. But is there anything else that we didn't cover? I'd say that's where you're going to find us for now. Yeah. Like I said, very active on social media. Okay.

You can do the old school, take the old school route and sign up for the newsletter. the email. I'm all about the newsletters. It's becoming from yours truly. Yeah. We'll promise not to in and date. That's, I have the newsletter for my, for my scrunchy line and people are like, ah, it's already sold out.

I didn't know. I'm like, sign up for the newsletter. Yep, that's right. Yeah. The newsletters are important. Yes. Okay. And collabs.

I mean, I think that's something that we're very passionate about, too, is collaborating with different women that are doing things. So if you, scrunchy, number one. I'm into this. We're already into that. So just communicate. We want to communicate with you. like I said, email or Instagram, and just tell us what your strengths are, what you do,

and we want to find a way to use our platform to help you. Well, you both have inspired me, both of your strength and your stories and what you've gone through and how you're navigating this world now through your learned lessons and what you've been through is so inspiring. And I would absolutely friggin' love to collaborate with both of you and do something with it. So that would be great. And now confess to me. I'm going to read a confession just to set the tone here.

Excellent. From one of the listeners. We'll see if she wants to be anonymous or not. She didn't disclose if she wants her name out there or not, so I'm just going to say no. But she said, I was at a Lady Gaga show years ago. I had to pee so badly, but I didn't want to lose my spot by the stage. So I chugged my beer and ripped a hole in my fishnet stockings and peed into my cup. Thank God for skirts.

There was a trash can close by, so I tossed the cup when I was done. I mean, that's ingenuity. I mean, that's actually kind of impressive. Yeah, you know what? I'm impressed. I'm actually not even mad about it. No, I'm actually okay with it. I'm okay with it.

And I'm also like, that's a life hack right there next time. Anybody out there at a concert? I'm like, wow, life hack. Okay. But you know, she did the cut. kind thing for the community, which is put it in the trash can and not on the stage because someone might have thought, oh, a free beer. Oh, a free beer.

And then jokes on them. Yeah, exactly. She's a good Samaritan. You know what? We like her. She's a Nashville girl. What a hero. She's a freakie.

I want to say her name just because I want to give her the respect. Lady Gaga fan. Lady Gaga fan. But tooting your own horn over there. We get it. We get it. You're a hero. That's amazing.

I might read a couple more, but you guys go with yours. would not be nearly that entertaining. That's okay. But I do have to say, the first thing that came to my mind, because, per our discussion before, I think my memory stopped working at age 25, so I'm really sad about how the next 50 years in my life was going to go. But I will say, I am the queen of sending the text to the person you're talking about, you know, like, and genuinely, like, I'm a fairly kind person.

They're not normally that bad, but, like, the guilt and face rush of blush that happens when you realize, oh, my God, I sent that to them. Right. I've done it chronically my whole life, but one of the worst was in high school, my high school boyfriend, who, thank God, our three months blazing love relationship didn't work out because now my literal best friend since was 10 years old as her husband, they married. So shout out to Emma and Zach, glad it didn't work out with me. Oh, that's cute. But I think I was in fact trying to text her about what a jerk he was being. And I mean, I'm like 14 or 15, I don't know.

And you're not supposed to have your, you know, cell phone at school, right? So I did, like a naughty girl, and he actually kept his in his truck. Thank God, by the way, I sent this long diatribe about how awful he was and blah, blah, blah, blah, to him, of course. And then I realized, like, two periods in that I had done this when I approached Emily and I was like, what? You didn't get my text? Like, are you not concerned? My life is falling apart? And she was like, I didn't get a text from you.

And I look back at mine and it's the, oh, no moment. So anyway, I being the word nerd that I am, had immense guilt, but I skipped one class, snuck out in the parking lot. of the old school trucks with the code pad pad code whatever yeah on the side yeah totally of course newest thing so basically this was like the 2005 version of hacking into your boyfriend's phone right right so I hack into his truck delete the text pray for forgiveness go back to school good for you wait that's amazing later that's not that great of a story no that's good no I'm into that one yeah because you know I can only hear so many poop stories yeah so that was different and I'm I'm like, I'm like, yes, okay, that's good.

And again, impressive. Follow through. It's all about the follow through. Okay. Okay, again, mine, I really am not to the point yet that I can say a lot of them yet in public. But one that my best friend just reminded me when I texted her said, tell me one of the embarrassing moments. She said, how in the world, can I narrow it down? But so I went to a tiny private school my whole life, maybe had 50 kids in my class.

So when I was a freshman at UT with the same amount of people in my whole entire high school in my first. class. I walked in, I sat down, and it was supposed to be my math class. And the teacher walks in and just starts speaking in French the whole time. And so I'm looking around and like hitting people going, what did she do? Oh my gosh. Yeah. That's so funny. And so she looks at me because I'm making, you know, because I just thought she was being just, you know, dramatic entry. Like, yeah. And then I looked down and saw French books. And because she actually called on me and I was like, oh, yeah, Juma, we, we. And everybody was just staring at me. I thought I was going to make the class count and so cool.

You know, I was killing college already. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So that, Courtney was like, you're never going to live that down. And, of course, there was like, 800 people in that one class. I was like, hey, college. I hate this. I'm going back.

No, trebie. It's by to get up in front of everybody. Like, you know, the door's so loud, slams behind you. Oh, man. That's the only appropriate one I probably can tell you. You're like, can I be homeschooled for college? See, that's so funny because I'm like, we love inappropriate on this podcast. We'll get you next time.

Yeah. We'll get you next time. next time. Okay, well, I always end the podcast with a good joke. Both of you told me you didn't have any. Yeah. Both of you suck at jokes. So again. And confessions. Yeah. They were so PG. That's okay. They were still good confessions. And I will appreciate, I will, you know, drink my wine for your sins. But this joke comes from one of my listeners. I love dumb jokes. Okay. Are you ready for it? Ready.

Hey, do you guys know the difference between a shower curtain and toilet paper? do you one's plastic okay do you I'm just thinking of like a long came polly

that's all that's coming to my mind I don't know hey just say no no no you don't that's disgusting

I mean I guess that's fair that's amazing I kind of liked it but would Lady Gaga fan used the shower curtain she probably would

if she was being resourceful and it needed to happen she would yeah so really she cares about the universe so really jokes on this listener with a joke uh drew has a joke out there for us drew why did the scarecrow win an award

why did the scarecrow win an award because he was outstanding in his field ah i like that one yeah i like that one too very good yes you got another one for us drew introduce yourself first of all hi hi i'm drew yes and what do you do i'm your engineer for the day thank you drew go on with your jokes oh Well, I'm a dad of a four and a two-year-old, so I've got dad jokes for days. Oh, absolutely. And I'm all about the dad jokes, so keep going. Keep it coming.

Oh, let's see. What can I tell that's PG? No, never. But have we all not learned here that PG, like, please tell the rated R one. Is there rated R dad jokes? OxyMoron. What's the difference between a lentil and a chickpea? What?

This feels R-rated. I'm really excited I've never had a lintel on my chest that's pretty good and that's what I'm talking about thank you is such genuine joy on your face I can't tell you how happy

that just made me that is the way we end this podcast Bravo Drew Bravo Drew that's what the people are here for thank you both for coming on the podcast and for doing what you you and for being just inspiring

lovely women and I can't thank you enough. I can't wait to like pump the shit out of this. Oh yeah. Like I can't. I'm so excited. You will sell one million scrunchies. Yes. And here you guys can fight over which scrunchies you get. And there you go. This is awesome. I've taken the pink one.

I didn't really have a choice. There you go. I love it. Oh my gosh. That joke is going to, that's my new joke. I'm telling people. Thank you for that, Drew. And I'm Caitlin Bresto. I'll see you next Tuesday. Thanks for listening to Off the Vine with Caitlin Brisco. Get new episodes every Tuesday exclusively on podcast.1.com, the Podcast One app and subscribe on Apple Podcasts. Who's not with OTV? Off the Vine sponsors for this week. KY duration extend both your pleasure. Pick up your

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