Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Roxie Nafousi | Manifest Your Best Life: From Rock Bottom to High Vibrations!

Episode Date: April 4, 2024

#725. Join Kaitlyn Bristowe on this energizing episode of Grape Therapy as she dives into a transformative conversation with Roxie Nafousi, self-development coach and author of "Manifest: 7 Steps to Living Your Best Life" and "Manifest for Kids" From overcoming addiction to embracing the power of manifestation, Roxie shares her journey from rock bottom to radiant success! Discover the basics of manifestation, learn the seven steps to living your best life, and gain insight into practical manifestation techniques you can start practicing today. From removing fear and doubt to turning envy into inspiration, Roxie provides invaluable tools for personal growth and empowerment! Plus, join Kaitlyn and Roxie in a Manifestation Challenge – share your intentions and goals for the week ahead by leaving a review or commenting on our Instagram and let's manifest together! Tune in now for a dose of inspiration that'll leave you motivated to manifest greatness in your own life! If you’re LOVING this podcast, please follow and leave a rating and review below! PLUS, FOLLOW OUR PODCAST INSTAGRAM HERE! Episode Highlights: (4:53) - Roxie's pivotal moment of realization about manifestation and its connection to self-worth. (8:30) - The profound impact manifestation had on Roxie's life just two weeks into practicing it. (21:15) - Roxie discusses the importance of overcoming tests from the universe while pursuing manifestation goals. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Okay, let's talk about the original enemies to lovers story. Before all of our reality TV couples, before the rom-coms, we binge, there was Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy in pride and prejudice. And Audible has just dropped a brand new original that will have you completely hooked, I am. It's not just any audiobook. This is a full cast performance. So Marisa Abella, you might know her from industry, brings Elizabeth Bennett to life.

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So whether it's your first time experiencing pride and prejudice or you've read it a million times, you're going to fall absolutely in love all over again. So go listen to Pride and Prejudice now at audible.ca slash Jane Austen. Okay, don't hit skip before we start today's podcast. I'm really excited. This is a personal, exciting thing for me. I wanted to quickly let you guys know about my upcoming Off the Vine tour called Poor Decisions. P-O-U-R-Doy wine will be drank. I'm back on the road.

For the first leg of our tour, I'm coming through the good old. Midwest. For the second half, I'll be headed to the southeast. So I'm going Columbus, Cleveland, Ohio, Atlanta, Madison, Des Moines, Kansas City, Columbia, Missouri, Tampa, Orlando, Nashville. Ah, I'm coming to all you beautiful people. These podcast tours are always a highlight of my year because there's just no other way to put it than it's just pretty damn fun. I get to hang out with you in person. It's just the energy is electric. It's just insane. Like leaving those live podcast. I'm like, whoa, that felt like an empowerment session. I feel elevated. The vibrations don't get me started on how high those are. So check out my website, Caitlinbristow.com to buy

tickets for those who join me. I can guarantee a little dancing, a lot of laughing, wine, lots of wine, even if you're pregnant. I've had pregnant, sober people come to my show and say it was still fun. They bring their boyfriends, their husbands, and I even see them smiling at the end of it. So let's toast to that. I'll see you on tour. I'm Caitlin Bristow, your session is now starting. Hey, everybody, welcome to Great Therapy. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow, and today we have Roxy on the podcast, who is a self-development coach. She is the author of Manifest and Manifest for Kids as well. I loved this conversation because I can have everybody on about manifesting and I will

always learn something new. And I told her at the end, in six years of podcasting, this was one of my favorite conversations just because it's so inspiring and it makes me feel so motivated to be my best self. We talk about what it means to be high vibrational, high vs, high vibes, if you will, compared to low vibes. We talk about how to remove fear and doubt. We also talk about how to turn envy into inspiration. Those are just a few topics we talk. on. I just feel like everybody's going to take something away and I can't wait to hear at the end if you guys want to leave a review and comment about what you're going to kind of manifest for the week ahead. Yeah, I'm really excited for you guys to hear this one. Thank you so much for joining us. I

am so excited because I love talking all things manifestation and I feel like you're the best of the best. So everyone can learn something today from you, which is exciting. And I just want to dive right into it because I know we both have about 45 minutes. So I was precious and I want to get all of the information out of you. So I thought we could just go right back to the beginning and talk about how after years of living a hedonistic lifestyle in your early 20s, you know, fueled by partying and addiction and poor self-care, you kind of found yourself at Rothbottom. And I talk about Rothbottom a lot on this podcast and how that kind of moment in life propels you into what's next and you can go like in the right direction, which it always feels like you won't, but you do.

So I wanted to know, everybody has heard on my podcast a million times what my rock bottom was, but I wanted to know what was your rock bottom, what did that look like, and how did you come out of it? Yeah, so basically it was May 2018, and as you said, I had basically spent 10 years prior to that, addicted to cocaine and alcohol. I was the biggest chain smoker. I had no self-worth, no career, no confidence, nothing. And basically, I went on a yoga teacher training course in Thailand, and it was because, you know, anyone who's got any experience with addiction will know there are plenty of times where you're like, this is it,

this is going to be the moment that I give up and I'm going to, you know, change. And in one of those moments, I said, okay, I am going to sign up for a yoga teacher training course, and this is going to be my moment to change my life. So I went away 200 hours of yoga, meditation, obviously no access to any of my vices and thought this is it. And then I got back to London with good intentions and within 24 hours I was back taking drugs. I went on a 48-hour bender and at the end of that, you know, I'd done a lot of things I regretted. I woke up so full of shame and regret and self-loathing and above all, a real sense of hopelessness.

And I was like, I am never going to change. And so I called a friend of mine, and I was like, what shall I do? And she said, oh, babe, don't worry about it. I just listened to this podcast or manifesting, you should listen. And I was like, okay, fuck it. Like, I'll try anything. So I listened to this podcast and manifesting and something just clicked. And what clicked was that manifestation was all about self-worth.

And I had none. So I was manifesting, but in the wrong direction. I was keeping myself stuck. I was keeping myself, I think, in victim mentality. And I realized in that moment that I had to take responsibility for my life and for my happiness and to create change. and that's what I decided to do. I believe in that so much just because I've kind of lived it and done it myself,

so I know how true it is. But can you explain to people, kind of will start at the basics, the basics of what you think manifestation is? Yes. So to me, manifesting is using the power of your mind to change and create the reality you experience. And to manifest literally means to make it happen. And it is a kind of wonderful combination of philosophy and science and wisdom and some spirituality. But I think there are lots of misconceptions around manifesting.

And I think that because it's become such a like trendy word to use and people using conversation, they're like, oh my God, I manifest this handbag. Or, you know, they're using it in a term that actually is really devaluing it because it's not being understood correctly. And so I think you get a lot of misconceptions and you get a lot of criticism over the practice. But actually, it's just because it's not being understood, really, in the way it's supposed to be. I mean, this is a practice that has been around for centuries. And manifesting isn't just about visualizing what you want. This is a self-development practice.

And to me, all inner healing falls underneath the manifesting umbrella because this is a practice that at its core is about self-worth and about empowerment. It's about believing that you are worthy of receiving abundance. It's about changing your mindset. It's about becoming the best version of you that can exist. And it's about taking action. And so I went away and, you know, the beginning and I learned everything I could, not just about manifesting, but about self-development. I was listening to so many different speakers and philosophers and scientists.

And what I realized was that so many of these people were talking about manifestation, even if they weren't using the exact word. So I then developed my own unique seven-step guide to manifesting, which is, you know, the book Manifest. And it has worked not just to change my own life, but like hundreds of thousands of people. So it's really a privilege to be able to talk about manifestation because I think it's so life-changing. powerful. Well, and you're able to really speak on it from a place of one, you got yourself out of a rock bottom moment through it. And two, you've done so much research, like you said. And so, like, I can talk about manifesting all day, but I haven't done as much research as you. I just can give examples of how it has worked for me personally. But I feel like you have so many examples of how

manifesting and doing the work on yourself has impacted your life personally. I'm assuming I mean, one, that you're writing books on it now, but what other examples do you have of how it's impacted your life, what you've gained from this? Oh, my God. I mean, I truly think that there is nothing in my life that I haven't manifested. You know, the first example, really, was that two weeks after I've discovered manifestation on 7th of June 2018, someone called Wade messaged me on a dating app. And on the 7th of June 2019, a year to the day, my baby boy wolf was born.

So, yeah, I mean, I got my baby from. from it. I have an incredible career, one that I really only could have dreamed of. But above all, and I think the most important gift it's given me, is I have found a sense of confidence and in a peace that I truly never thought was possible. I mean, it's hard to describe the self-loathing I have always lived with. I mean, that inner critic has been such a monster for all of my life, since my earliest years, I genuinely believed when I was young at school. I was like, if I wasn't me, I would be so much happier, like, if only I could live in someone else's body.

And so to be able to walk into, like, someone said to me recently, like, what is confidence? And I'm like, confidence is being able to walk into a room unapologetically yourself and be able to leave, not worrying what everyone thinks of you. And to be able to do that is a really liberating feeling. Well, especially over, I mean, if you said it was 2017 or 2018 that you started this journey? 2018, yeah. So to be able to do that over five years when you've lived a certain way for I'm not sure how old you are, you're beautiful and you look young, but like to live a certain way and believe a certain

thing about yourself for that long to then just start a practice and work on it like probably daily, maybe even hourly for you for five years. It just gives people so much hope that they can do it too because even people, you know, as children, you can feel that way, but you can also feel that way as an adult in your 30s and your 40s and your 50s and it's never too late to start this kind of practice for anybody right because look at what it's given you in just five years oh my god 100 percent i think it's like never too late to change i mean i was just 28 about to 10 27 about to turn 28 when i discovered it but you know it's been an ongoing journey as well like i always say this isn't a quick fix but manifesting is a way of living you know i live and breathe my seven

step. So I use them every day. It is absolutely, like I say, it's for everyone. And it's free. The stuff is free. Like, it's accessible. It's about a mindset shift. And it doesn't, I don't know. It's not. And the reason I say at the beginning, like there's some part of it is spiritual, but not all of it is that you don't have to be spiritual. Like I wouldn't call myself a particularly spiritual person. I definitely didn't ever. I mean, I am a bit more now. But I didn't start that way. In fact, I was very much, and like, I'm a realist, but this practice isn't actually spiritual. It's about empowerment, and it's about being proactive. And so if you're listening and you're like, I'm not sure if it's for me, really give it a chance.

Well, yeah, because it's also science, like the law of attraction. It's also, you know, I'll never forget watching that movie and reading the book The Secret when I was like 23, 24 years old, just being like, oh, I feel like I can do this. Like, I feel like they're telling you the science behind it and why it works. and then I started seeing things being able to happen from doing it. And I was like, okay, this is, yeah. And I wasn't, I wasn't spiritual at all back in however long that was ago. But you talk about these seven steps.

And I'm such a firm believer that you need to constantly be learning and growing to be a better person. So I would love to learn what I could be doing better. And I think everyone would. And your book manifests, you've got the seven steps that you were talking about to living your best life. So I want to go through the seven steps with you. and I want everybody to get the book as well, because I'm, I'm going to.

And I want people to actually like, like you said, practice it, live it every, every day. So one is be clear in your vision. Now, I have a question about this because I was looking at Rob Deer Dick, like he can envision what he wants his life to look like down to the outfit he's wearing. Do you mean like be clear in your vision, like visualizing exactly what you want or what do you mean by that? I think there's lots of different aspects. of it. I think the first thing is really to understand that be clearing your vision is asking you to really think about what you want your life to look like one year, six months, you know, five years

from now. And I think that, yes, part of that is visualization and like just seeing it. But actually, more importantly, it's really about understanding how you want to feel within that space and how you want your life to feel. Like, do you want to feel more empowered? Do you want to feel like there's more passion in your life. Perhaps do you want to feel like you're experiencing adventure? You know, it's just as much about seeing it as is about understanding how you want it to feel. But more importantly, it's about thinking about who you want to become. Like who is the highest version of you that exists and can you visualize that person? Because this isn't just a journey of like attracting things. Like the things are great. Yes, you can attract abundance and money and cars or

not cars, but, you know, jobs or houses or whatever it is. But it's really about the fact that if you are manifesting the best version of you that could possibly exist, the most empowered version of you. And you can think about that version of you in terms of like, what's that version of you doing day to day? What are the daily habits? What are your boundaries like? How do you react to other people?

How much respect do you have for yourself? And then when you've got this idea of not only what you want and you've got clear clarity in your goals and you've thought about who you want to become, there are then two things that you can do. One is to create a vision board and the other is to do visualization meditations or visualizations. Visualizations are really important to this practice and there is neuroscience behind this. So when we regularly visualize our goals, we essentially prime our subconscious to reach those goals by filtering out unwanted information and seeking out opportunities that are aligned with that goal. And so that's why so many athletes do it. You know, it's so many people will speak about the

power of visualization. And it is, you know, there is science behind it. It's really, the thing about our subconscious is 95% of our brain's activity. Essentially, we're getting it to work for us. So it's a really simple practice that will help us. I did a week therapy course where we did visualizations every day. And one time it was about two hours of doing a visualization. And again, we didn't, like, same thing was when you went away. We didn't have devices, nothing, like, no distractions. So on day three, I could just drop right in and just, like, get to that point so much easier.

And I feel like I've lost it a bit, but I know how powerful that can be. I actually, before you came on, I was looking up these, like, manifestation and meditation pods that you can buy where it's like, it's a whole, I'm going to send you a link after. Oh, please. They should send you one and it's like they should gift you one because I think it's pretty expensive but it's like it's so cool and it has this the website has this whole thing about how it works so I'll send it to you after but yeah I feel like you've got to like get in the right zone and put your devices away and really like like you said visualize it's

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So remove fear and doubt. I really want to dive into after, so we'll get back to that. But what about number three, align your behavior. Can you explain that one? Align your behavior is all about being proactive on your manifesting journey. And it's about taking action. Essentially, it's about taking the steps that you need to take to get to where you want to go. So I always say you can't think your way to success.

You know, this really is about hard work. It's about stepping outside your comfort zone. It's about creating change. And it's also about showing up as your future self. You know, it's about acting as though you are already ready, you know. And sometimes we don't do that. Sometimes we're waiting to be ready. We're waiting to feel more confident.

We're waiting for X, Y, Z to make the moves when actually it's about showing up as your future self would and doing it now. And in doing so, you start to reach those goals. So it's kind of, I always say step two, which as you said we'll go into, step two has this really nurturing feeling to it it's this really this is all about healing and about the inner work and it's got this almost like much more feminine energy whereas align your behavior has this more much more masculine energy this is about discipline it's about motivation it's about you know giving yourself a kick up the ass when you need it so i love this step and it's the

steps i think a lot of people miss or cynics miss so they'll say oh you can't just you know visualize what you want and then expect it to happen it's not magic and I'm like, no, I agree. You can't expect it to happen. It's not magic. You have to take action. That's true. That's actually a good reminder for me.

I've never really thought about this. Actually, there's a few steps where I'm like, wow, I want to live by this every day as well because I wouldn't have thought of aligning my behavior, even though, like, even just aligning myself with the people I like to, that make me feel happy, the right people all of a sudden, I sleep better at night. I'm in a better mood. I'm doing things I love to be doing with them. It's like aligning yourself in so many different.

different ways. Imagine that you're in constant dialogue with the universe and you're always trying to show the universe that you believe you're worthy of receiving. So everything that you do is a reflection of that. So whether you, what you are thinking, how you are behaving, what boundaries you set, how you treat yourself, that all impacts your manifesting process because of this constant dialogue. And I love number four, overcome tests from the universe because everybody always thinks to, if you're just thinking of it as this trend or buzzword manifesting, all of a sudden you have doubt if you were being tested and you think, like, oh, I must not be on the right path. So can you talk to us about overcoming tests from the universe?

So on your way to your manifestation goals, you'll be met with tests. And these tests are really there to ask, how worthy do you really think you are of receiving? And tests can come in a number of different ways, but, you know, often they come as just challenges. and obstacles, rejection. And when these things happen, we always have a choice. So the choice is, do I see this rejection or obstacle as proof that I'm not worthy of it? So do we just say, see, I knew it wasn't meant for me, I knew it was going to happen, and then you allow yourself to be deterred by it, and essentially you keep yourself stuck.

Or are you able to say, okay, what can I learn from this? What value can I take from this? And how can I persist through this challenge and keep going towards my goals? So this step really, it allows you to kind of go through the ebbs and flows of life with such greater ease and resilience. And for me, it's my favorite step because I always say manifesting as a life practice, which means we have to account for real life. And life comes with its challenges.

It's not easy all the time. And you don't learn to manifest and life is perfect. But you are able to handle those challenges in such a. empowered way and you don't get hopeless. You know, you're able to say, look, I'm going through a rough time. I'm going through a bad patch. But I know there is a reward on the other side. And that is like such, it's such an amazing feeling. So if I'm going through a dark time, I'm not hopeless. I'm like, something good is on the other side of this. I try and think that way too. Even when I'm sick, I'm like, hey, my body is ridding myself of toxic energy and bad things. And I'm going to feel so much better on the other

side so I need to like be grateful even for feeling sick right now because yes it sucks and it's not fun but it's I'm getting rid of certain energies and I like what you said too about how things will just keep showing up for you right if if if you get stuck where one of my favorite sayings is what you don't heal will always be revealed it's like if you another sign from the universe overcoming these tests is also showing you what you need to work on so a lot of times when is really just like getting in my way. It's making me feel like giving up or feeling stuck. I'm like, oh, clearly this is hitting something that I need to really focus on and work on.

And then I'll go to therapy and talk through that because I'm like, clearly it's showing me something that needs to be healed. It's such a good tool. I completely agree with that. Yeah. Now, embracing gratitude, explain number five to, or no, it's number, yeah, number five to me. Yeah. So gratitude is this feeling of appreciation.

It's this really high vibrational frequency. And, you know, my mom used to say this phrase in Arabic, which, like, describes this step perfectly. And it translates as, for every thanks you give, you get a thousand in return. And that is it. Like a grateful heart, you know, that quote, grateful heart is a magnet for miracles. And I think that people can often miss gratitude when it comes to manifesting because they're so focused on the goals. Whereas gratitude is really asking you to enjoy the journey and be able to make the life that you already have feel is. good as possible. And it's about putting yourself in this abundant mindset, you know, so that I

already have so much. I already have so much love. I already have, I already have everything I need. And in return, the universe will keep giving you more of it because, you know, because an abundant mindset does attract more abundance to you. Look, I've got loads of tools in the book of like how to practice this step and the positivity journal in there is an amazing one. But I call it the manifesting sweet spot knowing what you want whilst being entirely grateful for all that you already have yes yes and something that i found that i was doing and this is not good is i would say okay well if i do this like then i better get good things in return and it's kind of being like dropping that idea and and being grateful without like you know like i i always say when a dog sits he wants a

cookie and you have to like, you know, want to sit without getting the cookie, just do it out of, you know, like don't do it for something. Yeah. Yeah, I love that. Turn envy into inspiration is my other favorite one that you say, which is the other one I want to dive into. So we'll go into those two. But number seven, trust in the universe. It sounds simple, but how do we do that? So trust in the universe really is all about surrender. So a lot of people think that manifesting is about control and, you know, it's about holding onto those goals and thinking really hard about it. But actually, this is blocking us. When we become obsessed with our goals, I think we put off this desperate energy. And that desperate energy is a representation

of the fear and doubt that is blocking you from having the things that you want. So the trick is actually to know what you want and then let it go. It's about sitting in this unwavering confidence that you don't know you to know how, but you just know it will all happen the way it's supposed to And I think that a part of the way that you can strengthen this trust and this surrender is by looking at all the coincidences and serendipities in your life that are occurring and allow them to show you that the universe is always listening. So, you know, whether you're thinking about someone, they call you the next day, or, you know, you're talking about something with a friend and then an email about it pops up, you know, look at these as not as just coincidences, but as signs from the universe. I think that, you know, for me, my secret source to manifesting is never emotionally attaching to the outcome. So it's about knowing I have all these goals, but I don't think that these goals are what's going to make me happy. And this should be like the disclaimer

of manifesting that reaching your goals won't make you happy. Reaching goals doesn't make anyone happy. I mean, you'll know this. You've probably reached some amazing career goals. And you're over it in 30 seconds. You get an adrenaline high. You probably feel really proud of yourself. And then you move on. If we attach happiness to the outcome of our goals or the things we want to manifest, we actually really ruin the journey for ourselves. The trick is actually to be able to enjoy the process there. Enjoy the hustle. Like that's actually the fun bit and know that those things, you know, goals are important because we need something to work towards. We need something to motivate us, but they're not the thing that makes us happy. Happiness is built

along the way. That is such a good reminder for me too because I do this all the time where I go what's next and that's not the healthiest mentality because I win I won the mirror ball and dancing with the stars and I go, okay, but what's next? And then I buy the house that I've been thinking about and then I'm not appreciating how hard I work to get there. What I did, how I moved mountains to get to where I am today. I go, oh, I don't have a plan for what's next. next to like how can I not be thinking about this instead of still appreciating all the hard work that went into it. And I like that reminder to, you know, where I'm at right now, don't, don't be thinking about the next goal that's going to, you know, achieve happiness. Think about what I'm doing

right now to appreciate how far I've come and how grateful I should be to not have to know what's next, you know? And that's why the gratitude practice is so good for that because happiness really is about enjoying small moments of joy every day, you know, taking time to appreciate them. Yes, I agree. Okay, diving into number two, I can't wait to chat about how we remove fear and doubt because are there like specific tools that you can give us to help ease our mind and not let these thoughts consume our brains because it's so overwhelming and it's so hard to not do that. I've got it's so hard.

So fears and doubt are the kind of are a culmination of all our interactions. insecurities, low self-worth, limiting belief. And they are the two things that are blocking all of us from having what we really desire because we can only manifest and we subconsciously believe we are worthy of receiving. And so that journey of removing fear and doubt is the healing journey required for manifestation. And there's two kind of sides of it when it comes to this removal process. One side really is about going deeper with the help of therapists, counselors, healers, doing things like hypnotherapy.

like there is our past is constantly controlling us like it is so until we are able to look at our old traumas and our wounds and really process them so that they don't have power over us anymore we're not really going to be able to free ourselves like it's an essential part of the process but there are things that we can do day to day as well because we have this thing called neuroplasticity which is our brain's ability to form new neural pathways through repeated thought in action. So we can start to change our belief systems. And this is important because our belief systems are the lens through which we view the whole world. Okay, so I always imagine that you're wearing a pair of glasses. And if you have these limiting beliefs, I'm not enough. I'm no good.

Life is unfair. Good things don't happen to me. It's like our glasses are dirty. Like they're completely murky. You can't see straight. You know, you can't see the opportunity. You can't see the good in your life. You can't see the positive relationships. in your life. And the process really is about cleaning these lenses, you know, being able to replace these limiting beliefs with more empowering ones. There are lots of middle tools we can use. I mean, one of them is, you know, really about being hyper vigilant with our self-talk and managing the way that we speak to ourselves. Now, I know everyone listening to this will have heard that before, and they know it. But it really is about just being so unbelievably strict with

yourself and being conscious and aware and having awareness of your thoughts so you know for me for example with some of the limiting beliefs that I've overcome it will just be that every time I feel it coming and because our thoughts are just habitual they're just patterns first we have to start to be aware of them so we know what's coming up we know what chatter is coming and being so strict with yourself what's another thing I could say to myself to replace this thought what's another perspective I could take. So let's say somebody sends you an email and maybe it seems a bit direct. Your interpretation might be, see, they hate me, or I've done something wrong. What was it about me? And immediately, actually, you can say, okay, what's another interpretation I could make of

this? Okay, perhaps they were busy. Perhaps they're not having a great day themselves. Perhaps it's nothing to do with me. So there's always a new perspective we can take on things. And these are the perspective shifts. Actually, when we start to practice this, It starts to become something that we do habitually, when we do it enough. But you just have to force yourself in the beginning to start to choose empowering perspectives rather than ones that are holding you back. Another thing you can use is affirmations. You know, affirmations are so easy. They're the easiest tool to use.

So the way they work is that our subconscious can't differentiate a truth from a lie. So whatever you tell it, it will believe to be true. So if you are walking around saying, I'm no good, I'm not enough, life is unfair, good things don't happen to me. your subconscious is trying to find evidence to support that. Whereas if you're able to say, I am worthy, I am enough, life is good, good things are meant for me, your subconscious will try to find evidence to support that. So we can use affirmations to basically replace those negative thoughts, but also to feed our subconscious with this really empowering feeling.

And when we think a thought enough, it becomes a belief. There's kind of three times of day when they're most powerful to use, but you can use them any time you need to replace a negative thought. Remember, you can only have one thought at a time, so you can have, you do have the power to choose your thoughts. But as you're waking up, as you're falling asleep, and when you're in a meditative state, that's when you're most susceptible to positive messaging. So for me personally, I end my day with a visualization meditation, because I like to fall asleep to that vision of my future cell. and I always start my day with affirmation. So those waking moments are so powerful. And usually we waste them because we just go straight to check our notifications.

But I'm just asking everyone to give me 30 seconds. That's all it takes. So you wake up before you reach for your phone or anything else, you just say to yourself, today is going to be an incredible day. I love the person that I am. I love the person that I am becoming. You know, so just anything positive just to start your day

and feed your subconscious with something that it's then going to find evidence for throughout the day. And there's so many more tools, but they're all in the book. I could listen to you talk all day. One, your accent is beautiful, but too, you know what you're talking about, and it's just so, it's motivating me. Like, I'm getting excited to talk to myself in a more positive way. But I try and do that when I wake up in the morning, before I get my phone, I will hold my dog's paws and do affirmations.

And it's like my favorite way to wake up. because it's just the cute and I'm like, yeah, and I'm like thinking like the dogs could feel my positive energy, so they're going to have a good day. And I just love it. That's so sweet. I'm convinced they, they manifest in the morning with me and meditate. It's the cutest thing ever. My second favorite point of all, well, they're all amazing, but the point of turning envy into inspiration, I think it's obviously natural for everyone to have this little feeling of jealousy from time to time, but recognizing what that jealousy is. is, you know, and how do we take that feeling and make it productive, turn the envy into jealousy

and make it motivate and inspire us. I saw this quote that it said like comparison. I've been saying a lot about high vibrational and high frequency on Instagram lately. People are like, what does that mean? Some people get it and some people don't. But comparison and jealousy, like that's such a low vibration. And on a high vibration, this meme said we don't compare, we collaborate. And I really loved that. So how do we turn envy and jealousy into motivate and inspire us? So it's also one of my favorites. So envy comes from this really low vibrational scarcity mindset. So what it says is that you have something and that might mean less for me. And it really is a kind of, it's a manifestation of our fear and doubt, essentially, of our insecurities. And inspiration is the antithesis of envy.

that comes from an abundant mindset. It says, you have something and I can have it too. There's enough for a school. And I think that all of us feel envy and it's a totally natural emotion. I mean, look at kids. It's an emotion that they experience very early on. And so it really is natural. But a lot of us really try to deny when we feel it and we don't like to admit when we're feeling it. And the problem with that is that when we don't admit that we're feeling something, and we don't give ourselves the opportunity to change it. And often with envy, it gets passed on as judgment. So, you know, how many times there's a confident person walking the room

and you'll say, oh, they're so up themselves, you know, or something along the lines. And actually, that's envy in disguise. It's actually somebody going, God, I wish I had that confidence. And so what you can do in those moments is once you start to actually admit when you're feeling envious or jealous, you can allow it to show you what still needs healing, show you what you want more of, and then you can turn it in. into an inspired thought, you can say to yourself, I cannot wait to walk into a room and feel that confident. Or if you're scrolling through Instagram and someone's on holiday again, instead of

being like, oh, I can't believe they're away again. It's, you know what? I am so in need of a break, and I'm going to add that place to my vision board. And in fact, I'm going to go a step further, and I'm going to be happy for that person. You know, this is about celebrating others as well. And in that celebration, what we say to the universe is I am not threatened by another person's success. In fact, I'm allowing them to show me what's possible. And I think that the act of celebrating somebody else is such a demonstration of that abundant mindset. And I do believe you are rewarded in return. Yes, I agree.

That's something I feel like I've struggled with. It's funny because I do it more with men than women. I find myself wanting to root on other women and empower and there's enough room. And then I find myself with certain men, if they're in the same industry as me, I get very competitive. want to win where I think well I've got it figured up because I champion other women and that's you know I feel like I'm meant to do that where with men I'm like they can't win their slime balls and they're they're doing things differently and they don't deserve it I get competitive with that and it's hard for me well it's you know it's a really interesting thing to observe like what is

your belief around men that needs healing in general and then which is so funny because my dad is like my hero and I'm like if I even find a man half of the man that my dad is like what a blessing and so I grew up like having such a great example but then I dated some shitty guys yeah yeah well beliefs can be formed at any time you know it's not always a result of our parents um but you know I think it's really interesting to observe where our envy is coming up for us I mean and it's it's something that look it's always going to happen throughout our lives so it's definitely I I use this step, you know, if somebody gets something or I see something on Instagram and I'm like, I'll really openly say, oh my God, do you know what? Like, let's say I'm sat with my team and

somebody's just posted something, you know, work related. I will say like, oh my gosh, it's really made me feel a bit jealous and what's that showing me? And how can I, how can I use that as fuel actually to do better? Yeah, I, that's, I mean, it's a great perspective to have. And I got there, I got there with women because I worked on it. I used to be jealous in my 20s. Like I got there with women because I worked on it. Now I guess I need to work on it with other men. But it is, again, it's showing me something that I need to be healed.

So it's a good lesson. Only because you reminded me that, and you said something about high vibrations earlier, could you explain to my listeners what you believe high vibrations and low vibrations are? So everything in the universe is made up of energy. So the sky above us, the chair was south. on us, but also our thoughts and emotions. Everything is energy. And what differentiates one thing from another, like us from the chair or our thoughts, is the density and the frequency of the vibrations of the atoms. And so you have things that have high vibrational frequencies and things

that have low vibrational frequencies. So high vibrational frequency emotions as those such as gratitude, love, peace, acceptance, inspiration and low vibrational emotions, are those such a shame, anger, guilt. Now, the law of attraction, it's not technically, the law of attraction is not like hard science, right? But we know it, but the neuroscience of manifesting absolutely is. Law of retraction is not hard science, but anecdotally, we know it to be true. Now, the law of attraction says that like attracts like. And so high vibrational feelings will attract things that match that frequency. Now, I think that we all know this is true because when we wake up in a bad mood, we're angry, we're bitter, we're resentful. What happens? We spill our coffee. We miss our train.

Somebody pisses us off. A bill comes through the door, right? And yet, when we're in a great mood, and we're feeling good, and we're full of, you know, that gratitude and that abundant mindset, we would drive to walk and all the traffic lights are green, you know, and everything good seems to happen on those days. So I think it's really understanding that, yes, our energy does matter. And, you know, I'm somebody that, you know, it's very powerful in my manifesting process. Oh, my God. If I'm in a bad mood, watch what happens. Like, I feel the negative effects of it. Whereas if I'm feeling good and I'm in my high vibe, you know, I do attract more good things to me. So yeah, that's what it's about. I love it. I just believe it can be really, it can be really helpful.

and improve people's emotional and mental well-being to even just be aware of having those high-vibrational thoughts. Just even saying, oh, that's a low-vibrational way of thinking. I can recognize that. Let's kind of what we've talked about this whole time. But I thought a good way to end this podcast today would be to do kind of a manifestation challenge for my listeners. And I thought we could both kind of share intentions or goals for the week ahead.

And if people are listening to this too, I want everybody to come. kind of leave a comment or review and let us know what their intentions are for this next week or month or year, just because I am such a believer in either speaking it out loud or writing it down and I feel like that can make us all feel like we're one step closer to achieving it. So what is your intention or goal for the week ahead? I guess, you know, my intention and goal is always to be present in what I'm doing and to feel really mindful in it and to be able to have fun. You know, a lot of, I had loads of career goals in 2022 and 2020 and 23 and it was all about that. And this year, I really want to have fun.

So like I'm going to Sweden next week for work and I want to enjoy it. I don't want to be like, oh, this is stressful or I want to go and have fun as well because what I do for work is something I love. I love that. That's kind of how I'm feeling right now too because I get so stressed out. I have a podcast tour coming up and I'm so excited for it because every single. time I do it. I feel so much more connected with my listeners. I leave feeling like I'm giving something like someone something good and I feel like I'm getting it and return like the energy

between the crowd and myself. I feel like it's like I get inspired after leaving them, but it's the buildup to getting there, the booking the travel, booking the hotels. What am I going to do with the dogs? I'm not going to have them for it. And my brain starts going into like spiral mode of all the things that are going to be hard. And I'm like everything's done with the tour and I'm really excited to actually carve out some intentional time to focus on the fun stuff like the prizes the giveaways the guests that are going to be coming on the conversations i'm going to have and and having myself and people who are attending leave on a high vibration yeah i love that well i love to talking to you i've been podcasting for six years and this is one of my favorite

conversations i just love that is such an honor i would have that it's I loved hearing you talk about it and, you know, the fact that you've lived this life where, you know, you did struggle and you did hit rock bottom and you've come out of that and you're still going to always continue to work on this practice and just even seeing these seven steps and knowing about your book, I'm like, I feel just kind of, I don't know, I'm like recharged to live this kind of life again. So thank you so much. So kind. Thank you. Really. That's so sweet. Your insight and expertise on all these practices. I just, I learned so much. I know my listeners are going to learn so much and tell everybody where they can find your book and your socials. Manifest Seven Steps Living Your Best Life and Manifest in Action are available all major bookstores. And I'm Roxy Nafusi on Instagram. How do you spell that lot? Your last name. Oh yeah. Roxy with an I.E. and Nafusi Nafu Kna. F for Fred. O-U-S-for-S-for-S-F-S-F-S-S-F-S-S-S-S-E-I. You know, you've got to think every time I call the bank or anyone. Yes, you've got it dialed in.

We'll also put it on our show notes and on our Instagram as well. So I can't thank you enough. I really enjoyed that and I can't wait to read the book. Oh, I appreciate it so much. Thank you so, so much for having me. I'm Caitlin Bristow. Your session is now ending. And if I'm being honest,

I wouldn't mind a rating and review.