Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Sharleen Joynt

Episode Date: December 12, 2017

Bachelor Alum, opera singer, and fellow Canadian Sharleen Joynt shares the details on her marriage to Andy Levine, leaving the Juan Pablo season on her on terms, and her opinion on meeting ridiculous beauty standards through high-level contouring. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Okay, everybody, welcome to Off the Vine. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow, and joining me in the studio today, the lovely Charlene. Wait, I got to pour us wine first before I did. I love that you wait to be rolling to pour the wine. Yeah, every time. We could have done it before, but... Absolutely not, because I think the people at home like to know that I am drinking wine, like that it's not like a little cop out.

And I'm like, nope. Listen to that pour. Listen to the poor Oh gosh Okay so we have to talk about this first Because when I was going to write down your name to introduce you We had the same conversation the other day Because you were recently married

I went to put tickets under your guys' name for the holiday show Which was great by the way Oh thank you Awesome Oh we can talk about that later I'm all about it And I was like oh did you change your last name Because you're recently married

Now is it Levine or Levine? Levine. Oh, you don't know? I mean, he says Levine, but I feel like, I mean, to me, it could also make sense that it's Levine. Right. But he says Levine. So we'll go with that. Yeah, and no, I did not.

And no, you didn't. No. Well, you have, like, your name is a thing, and it's you, and it's who you are. And that's, I love that you said that to me. You're like, it's not just like a word. A word. It's my identity in a way. I really liked that, and it stuck with me.

And then I'm like, yeah, I'm Caitlin Bristow. Who are you? It's kind of, I mean, it is a little archaic in a way to consider that you would just automatically. I understand if you have no emotional attachment or affiliation with your maiden name. Right. Like if you don't have a relationship with your father where you got the name from or something like that. Yeah. But I was like, I want to keep the last name going.

I even wanted to name my son Bristow because I want to like keep that name alive. Yeah. For a boy's name. That's great. I love it too. So, okay. That said, Booth is a cool. But it's a solid last name.

It's a great last name. And I also think it is romantic to take the guy's last name, but I like that I have that option. Yeah. And then when it comes to having kids, I'm like, well, then what last name do they take and do I do the Bristow booth hyphenated thing? Oh, but you could also, you had a son, his name would be Bristow. And then his name would just naturally be Bristow. You know what? Even if I have a girl, her middle name is going to be Bristow.

I just, that's happening. It's such a good name. That's happening. See, that's the thing. Joint is not a great name. What is? Joint? I like the way it's spelled.

Well, when people, you know, I say joint and this is just like at, I don't know, somewhere where I'm like just signing up for an email. Right. And I have to, I'm like like a joint, but with a why. And they're like, oh, okay. It's just not. Sean does call you Charlene Doobie. He does. When I ran for student council president, my slogan was the best joint you'll ever have.

And this joint is smoking. Gold. Right? I obviously won. No kidding. You can't not win with that. That's genius, though. That's, yeah. Yeah. And see, I've said this on the podcast before, so everybody knows it's an old joke. But, and my nickname in high school was No Brestos. Caitlin, no Brestos. That's the meanest thing I've ever heard. It really was. And they used to tell me that I would get mistaken for their dogs throwing stick because I was so skinny. Oh, my God. Where did you? This is in Vancouver? This was in La Duke, Alberta.

Davey Randucci, if you're listening. I just called them out. These sounds so un-Canadian. I know. I think they were flirting with me, though. Oh, that's a roundabout game. Yeah, that's a tough bounce, Davey. Some heavy negging.

I think that was their way of, like, flirting with me because, well, I'm just telling myself that. You should. And now I found a man who loves my small boobs. Aw. At least he tells me that. All the guys out there listening. And you're like, he's a nice guy. Okay, so recently got married.

Yes. I want to know details because your dress was stunning. Thank you. Love the low back. Thanks. Did you have a dress change or did you just stick to one dress? I put so much work into that dress. I was not.

Yeah, you're like, I'm not getting out. I was not changing that dress. I also just, I'm kind of a cheap skate in some ways. And I like, the thought of buying two dresses is so unnecessary. Yeah. The only reason if I wear two, it's because they're given to me. I would not pay for two wedding dresses either. So that makes sense. Yeah. And was it just such a romantic day? I feel like you two are so romantic. Aw. I mean, we're happy. Yeah. That was a good day. You've always just been so, you two both, like when we went for dinner that one time.

Oh, yeah. You can just tell when people, you know, are genuinely into each other and happy and the stories you could share together and, like. We're very honest with you. Very frank. But I love that. Like, you guys are very honest. open and know everything about each other. And I think that's really cool because that's who you are. Yesterday morning I was like, I had like an

ex-sex dream last night. He was like, really? He was like, tell me about it. Like he cannot, he's just not jealous and like I can tell him anything. Yeah. Which means that I just end up telling him everything for better or for worse.

But that's good because that means that you guys have a great conversation. Yeah. How about you and Sean? I feel like you guys are the same. You guys are so cute. If he told me he had a sex dream about another woman, and I think I would cry.

Really? I mean, he's so obviously so dedicated to you. Yeah, I know. But then I'd be like, why is your, like, subconscious? Why is she in your subconscious? Yeah, why? Who do you think about it? Like, why is she there?

Yeah. Who is she? Well, I feel like at first you'd probably be cool with it. And then you would, like, you'd marinate with it. I would marinate and I would. Yeah. That's what I don't even look into certain things. Like, even in past relationships, I wouldn't follow them on Facebook or anything because

I didn't want to question or overthink anything. Yeah. Like, I just don't want my brain to even go there. Yeah, because you know it can. Because it can. Yeah. And I'm like, if I just, you know, it's one of those like, you can't see me, but I'm covering my eyes. But if I don't see it, it doesn't bother me.

If I see it, I'll start exactly marinating and thinking and being like, what is the worst case scenario? Okay. At least you know that about yourself, though, because I think a lot of women are like that, but then they'll seek out information that they don't want to know. And then it ruins their relationships, like over and over again. Yes. And one of my girlfriends, I'm not going to call her out, but she knows who she is. she was dating this guy for like eight years he treated her like absolute garbage

I mean at first it was he was great but ended up treating her like garbage cheated on her and now still she like still cares about him they still talk once in a while and then she'll like go and look at this new girlfriend's page and like go look through her photos and compare and I'm like why do you even do that to yourself

like just don't even let your brain go there because I heard I don't know if this is true but I heard that like 94% of things you tell yourself are lies. Like when it comes to, when it comes to like... Oh, relationships. Negative things. Oh, okay. Like when you go to, when your brain goes to the worst place.

Yeah. It's like in the 90s percentage that you are telling yourself lies. Oh, that's really, that's really, am I like to swear on here? Yes. Okay, because I open the floodgates. That's really fucked up. It is. It is.

But it kind of is comforting, too. It is, but it's also like That's like your inner dialogue Like why would you do that? We're all like self-destructing It's so true We really are Yeah

That's a fact, sister Fact number one That is a fact Wait, wait, what were you time? Oh, your wedding No, but it's good I like when I hit one topic And we go off to others

Because I mean I could do this all day To be honest with you But you have Bachelor nation I hate saying that. I hate saying that. Bachelor Nation guests. But you're, I mean, you're friends with some of them in that world. Yeah. I mean, as are you. Like, you get it. Yeah, exactly. But I think it's so funny when you use the terms Bachelor Nation. I know. When I was, like, we had this Us Weekly story and they interviewed me like a couple days before the wedding. And they're like, so who from Bachelor Nation's going to be there? It's so funny. And then I'm like listing them. Yeah, yeah. Because they're the only ones that matter. Yeah, exactly. And then afterwards, they're like, can we get photos from the wedding? And so, like, I submitted photos that I thought were relevant.

And I'm like, well, could we get some photos of the guests? And I'm like, oh, me and this wedding dress isn't enough for you? Yeah. Also, like, who do you mean? Like, just come out and ask. Yeah. And you know who they meant. Yes, I know who they met.

It was just like, that wasn't disclosed beforehand. It doesn't bother me. Like, it didn't surprise me. It's just sort of funny. It's like, could we get some photos of like the guests? Yeah. That's, of course. And then, of course, I had to like, I would never submit a photo.

of anyone from Bachelor Nation without running it past them. And so it became this whole like, you know, back and this one, like, how about this one? And now, isn't that a whole other story, too, like having to approve photos that are going to go out into any, like, I wish we could all just look at one photo and be like, oh, I don't care, we're all together and happy. It's great.

But we're all like, oh. And everyone's only looking at themselves, too. I actually, I'll say that to Sean sometimes when we look at a photo and he'll be like, oh, I love it. I'm like, you just looked at yourself. That's a great photo of you. It's terrible. I mean, you didn't even look.

My eyes are closed. And I'm like, drooling. And you're like, great photo. Great photo. Looks good. I'm like, I can tell. Yeah, that's a whole other story. It's approving photos for social media.

I started a private one just for like my family and friends. That's smart. It is so liberating. Yeah, I'm sure. Like, just to put out a photo where I don't, like, it doesn't have to be aesthetically pleasing on my page or I don't have to like, like, it's just like a nice photo that I was like. I'm going to do that. It's liberating.

Because right now I just have Instagram. anxiety. That's the state in which I live. Yes, this takes that away. Because you're like... It goes back to the old days of it just being a personal album. Yes. And it's really great. And it makes me happy. And anytime I like am having anxiety on my like

page page, I'm just... My grid. The platform. I just like exit. And I'm like, go to my own one. And then I just like read my friend's comments and like go look through their photos. And you know who we all are. Plus I'm only following like really close family and friends on that one. So I'm like, I'm not getting annoyed by anything in

my feed. Not getting depressed. Not getting depressed. Yeah. So I one time was scrolling through Instagram right before bed and I started crying. I've done it so many times. Oh, yeah. That's, yeah.

And he's like, what's wrong with you? Well, first of all, you're a female and we have different hormones. Uh-huh. So it's not because we're like these crazy, you know, we have different hormones. We cry over things and we have emotions different than men. Yes. And Instagram is almost designed to make you feel terrible about yourself. It is.

There's no other way to put it. It's, I mean, it's fun. Yeah. It's great. Great way for a girl to eat and make money. Yeah. But it's also like, it is the devil. And I talk about that actually a lot on, not today, Satan.

I talk about it a lot on the podcast is doing the whole sucking yourself into the suckhole of Instagram and crying. I've done it. I've actually cried real tears numerous times just being on Instagram for dumb reasons, too. like some i'd be like oh i'm comparing myself and now i'm an idiot or others i'm like i miss my family like yeah i just cry i often i sometimes feel like depressed because i feel like some people like because other people are better at instagram than me which is like a terrible reason it's so stupid but i'm like yeah i get it yeah exactly um no i do the same thing i don't feel like i'm great at the gram you are i'm getting better wait you're great at the ground

no i am not you're so authentic like you always stayed the same Like, I love, I love, you never, like, bow down to what necessarily people want. That's true. Yeah. It's really nice. I'll pick that. I will accept your compliment. It's always weird to accept compliments.

Oh, I know. But that's true. And I, and that is something I really try to do is definitely stay true. And, like, my captions, I just try and, like, make people laugh. Sometimes I feel like, I don't, the picture isn't even good. I'm like, but I got to have a good caption because that's where I give my likes. You talked about this in at the live podcast. with Girls No Job and how it's all about the caption.

All about the caption for me. I learned that that day. I learned a lot that day. But, yeah, I was like, really? Because in my mind, it's like, oh, like a savvy photo. Right. No. No.

Yeah. It's true. But I do like your Instagram. It's gorgeous. Thank you, Kate. It's gorgeous. I'm glad you like it because that makes one of us. Well, you're going to start your personal private one.

Yes. And then you'll like the gram again. Yes. Is that a thing? Do we call it the gram? I think we do. I'm calling it the gram. So we all know I'd like to be comfortable during podcasting and just in general, actually.

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And you can get 20% off your order if you go to wearfigs.com slash vine with promo code vine. Obviously, we have to talk about your experience with Juan Pablo. Okay. Because that's people, well, you're Canadian. That's it. People know you. from Canada, but people do know you from one Pablo season in the States. Yes. Because you were like, you were big in singing in Canada before the show? Not at that

level. Oh, no. No. I mean, and who from opera is big? You? Can you name any other opera singer? Charlene Doobie. Yeah. There's no, yeah. No celebrities, really. Well, we'll get into your voice because I have I just need to talk about that. Oh, I want to talk about

yours. Okay, we can talk about both of our voices. After a JP. Okay, okay. Juan Pablo. Okay, I watched the season. And I always thought you were so mysterious. You were, you were like this, I don't know, a little dark horse mysterious. That's so funny.

You never got that before? I mean, no, I get that, like, a lot of years, I just didn't know that you would have thought that. Yeah. But when you met me, did that. No, right? No. Yeah. The mystery was solved.

The mystery was no more. But on TV, you really don't get to know somebody that much. You know, you're just watching this almost character, but still who you are. Yeah. But they become a character to the viewer. Totally. And to me, you were this gorgeous, mysterious Canadian. And when you opened your mouth to sing, I didn't think you were going to do it. And then you sang.

And I was like, okay. It was, I just have never heard anything like that. Thanks. Yeah. Like, that's such a, like you said earlier, like you don't know many opera singers. Like, you don't expect that. Yeah. And then when you did that on the show, I was just, like, baffled.

It was amazing. Thank you. It's funny because I'm actually really bad about practicing. Really? Yeah. So at home in our 700 square foot apartment. Oh, my God. Like, when I start practicing when I have to, like, I have a week of auditions coming up.

And it's audition season right now. That's why I have one later. And I'll start singing. And Andy's like, I forgot you did that. Oh, see? And if I had your voice, I would just be like, I'd like go to the kitchen and be like, do you want it? Like, I would just sing everything. You say that, but it's amazing how anything can become work.

That's true. Yeah. Like this podcast, I do not want to be here right now. I'm just kidding. I'm totally joking. I was actually really excited in this. But, no, you're right. Everything, it becomes work.

And sometimes you probably have to like pinch yourself that. Yeah. It's a bit like the gram. Like you start comparing yourself. Yesterday, I did two auditions in one day, and I closed with an aria and then left, and then another girl went in and sang the exact aria I had just sung. Oh, son of a bitch. And I can hear her, and it's like, wow, I feel so unspecial right now.

Which is so set because you have such a gift and that shouldn't be, but that's such a natural reaction. It's a competitive field. I mean, can you imagine if you're in musical theater or like, oh, my God, like. Yes. You're like, actually, I'm remembering, yes, I do know. I am a theater star, so. No, I'm just kidding. But I think.

back to like auditions for dancing all the time and um like cruise ship auditions I used to do yeah and I did in Vancouver for a little while I was auditioning for commercials and I always got like this is not to toot my own horn but I always got like the hot girl roles where they'd like send me in for beer commercials where I had to like flirt with a dude in the um audition and then you'd walk into the room with all the girls who are supposed to be auditioning and they all are just a similar like hotter version of you they're like Caitlin 2.0s all around and And you're just sitting in this room being like, oh, so who's going to get picked? And then you don't.

And you're like, I must not be hot enough. Oh, that's awful. And that's actually worse because it's not even like talent base. It's sort of like just, I feel like you're getting cost, like cast on your luck. It is worse because you're like, I don't even have talent. I just here because apparently people think I'm like attracted in some way. Like, presumably. No.

Oh, no. Are you kidding me? I've never, I cannot act. But I was going to. Oh, yes, you can. No. I'm a terrible. durable actor. Ask Carly and Evan when we made the scary movie. We made the scary movie out at a cottage. And they were like, Caitlin, you're not convincing. Like, I'm just not a convincing actor. But in these, actually, funny story. This is classic Caitlin going off topic. This audition I went to, I was dating a guy. Not even. I went on a couple dates with him. He was not my cup of tea. He was like way too into sports. And he'd like yell at the TV. And it was just awkward. And he was just too much. I'm a bro. And I was like, oh. And so anyway.

He was a phase. Yes. And so I was like, I ended it. And so we go, I didn't know he did auditions. Well, guess who's sitting in the room when I have to go in for an audition after I ended it? And he was like really defensive and like mean after I broke it off because he's a bro and he doesn't get dumped or something. I don't know. Oh, God.

The audition, get a load of this. It was for a Budweiser commercial. And I had to walk in. He had to be screaming at the glass where you keep the beer like it. in a liquor store, you know, like the coolers and all the beers he had. Like he needed to get into the beer. Yeah, but there was a sports game playing in the back. A hockey game

breaks out behind the cooler. And he has to be a sports fan banging on the glass, which is why I broke up with him because it was so annoying. And I had to be like, this guy I want nothing to do with him. For the commercial audition. And I was like, what? That's perfect. It was perfect.

And I don't know how I didn't get that because I nailed it. But like, how crazy is that? That is weird This is while you were still dating or after? No, after. I broke up with him because he was too crazy about sports Then the audition was him being too crazy about sports

I am too, secondhand embarrassment Full blown Anyways, you have an audition today So you can't drink too much wine It's actually for Nashville What? Really? Yeah, I just found out about this more I'm not going to get it, don't get excited

Don't say that You cannot put that negative energy out into the universe Charlene I'm a realist and I like to manage expectations always. I understand that. Yes. Because then you're never disappointed.

You're still going to be disappointed. Yes, but I'll be less... You set the bar low and then you're like, I'm not going to get it. So then if you do get it, you'll really appreciate it. And if you don't, you'll be like, exactly. And there's also just so much pressure to... Like, I'm a much better performer than I am an auditioner.

Yeah. Like, I'm not as good when there's something on the line. I totally get in my own head and start breathing really fast. Yes. So I... Who doesn't get in the wrong? own head. I don't know, but I want to be, like, in there for a second. And then get out. Yeah. Yeah. I don't want to be there all the time. Just when I'm auditioning.

Well, good luck to you. I think there's a high possibility that you get it. Oh, thanks. Does that mean you would move to Nashville? It would just be for one opera. Yeah, a couple weeks. Damn. So Juan Pablo. Oh, yeah. I know. A lot of tangents. I was just kidding. No, it was. We were talking about your voice, but I can't remember. Did you leave on your own terms? You did, right? Right before hometowns. Oh, so you're like, I'm out. I knew I was, like, I was pretty sure I was going to get a hometown. Like, you're not, when you're in that, you know, when you're in that place, you're not 100% sure about anything.

Yes. But I was pretty confident that I was going to get one. And the producers, I still distinctly remember, Alon was like, can you see yourself introducing Juan Pablo to your parents as a potential husband? And I was like, hell to the no. Yeah. I can't. No. And up until then, I was truly authentic or, you know, whatever.

I was not faking it. And I feel like at that point to bring my family into it and to be like, I'm considering marrying this man. You were being realistic. I would be acting. Yes. Okay. I totally get that. This is not to diss Chris in any way because I really was smitten with him on The Bachelor.

And I can see why he is really so lovely. He's so nice. And, you know, they're like, their tires are being pumped. like they are the bachelor, you know, this like, wanted, put on a pedestal, man. Yeah. And, but I got to a point where I'm like, am I confused? Am I actually in love with this person? Or am I just like, is it circumstantial?

Or I'm like in this situation and he's the guy I'm supposed to really like and that's all we talk about and all these other girls like him. So like, do I? And I got really confused. And I remember sitting in a room with Alon. And I think it was like six hours talking through if I actually. actually did, or if it was, and by the end of it, Alon had me convinced that, yes, I did. Of course he did. He is a true artist.

Because, oh, he. It's freaky. He is exactly where he is supposed to be in life. Yes. That is his calling. That is his calling. And he's really good at it. Very.

And that he is the reason. Was he your guy? A lot of the time, but he was kind of higher up at this point. Okay. So he came in and out when he needed to. Okay. You know, when they had to really convince me I was in love, they're like throwing along.

I'm bringing the big dog Bring in the big dog Yeah Yes Yeah What were you going to say On your season one? Oh he was

I think more in the house Yes Yeah And then I think he started Now I don't think He's in the house At all really He's a big big dog now

Yeah It's as big as I get Big as I get Yeah he's good I actually have this Theory too With the back Because you know

I spent a lot of time analyzing this Yeah That there is a sense of flattery That you feel By making it Further and further

Absolutely Yeah Especially surrounded by so many very intimidating women. Absolutely. So it's like you almost fall in love with the feeling of feeling flattered and special. You are, I don't know how I never thought of that. It makes sense.

Right. Yeah. Like it was like, I was like, I must be like pretty good cats. Yeah. No, for me, like I went in there kind of like, eh, and then I got the first impression rose and I'm like, well, he's kind of nice. Oh, yeah, you got the first impression rolls. Yeah, but like it's so like there's like 30 girls.

and she picks you, you're like, well, maybe there's something in him that I didn't see. Like, yeah, and it all comes back to vanity. That is, you're, oh my gosh, I love this. Now I'm going to dissect everything even more than I ever did. I know, it's dangerous. Slippery slow for morning. It is, but it's also like a little bit therapeutic. It is.

Because you can really, like, discover a lot about yourself through, well, through that whole process. And justify how you totally. Yes. I get it. Even as a bachelorette, now I'm like, hmm. A lot of things make sense now. Yeah. Anyways.

Who is the villain on your season? I'm trying to remember. He became the villain. You guys didn't need one because he was kind of like... I think it was going to be Nikki. Right. She kind of was in her way. Yeah, a little sassy pants?

Yeah, she was sassy pants. Yeah. She didn't bother me, but she had her moments. Right, right. But yeah, they totally spun that on its head and he was the villain in the end, yeah. I always have scared. they're going to do that to me somehow. How could they?

Well, I was always late, and they were always mad at me. I feel like I was just constantly, like, disappointing them. No, I'm not just blowing smoke up your ass. You just truly have, like, yours was one of the best seasons. Really? Yes, I'm not just saying that. And people tell me this all the time. Really?

Yeah, when we'll talk about favorite seasons and they're like, oh, Caitlin's. Oh. Or, like, I haven't, like, loved a season as much as, like, Caitlin's or since Caitlin. That's, like, yours was, like, an iconic season. Wow. Yeah. It was also, like, a. conversation starter. Oh, absolutely. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Great conversation. I didn't want to be

involved in that conversation, but it was great. Whether you like it or not. Who is your favorite Bachelor of all time? I know. I'm trying to think of mine. I'm a little old school. Yeah. That's fine. Ben Flannick. I loved his season. I've really liked his season two. Yeah. Did you know that I actually had a dream before I even knew I was thinking about going on the show that I was on the Bachelor on his season and that I was just like in a like I didn't know anything about the ITM rooms like the you know when you just go and speak about your feelings with all the candles and flowers behind you my dream I was in that room like talking to a producer and yeah about Ben that's awesome it was so random and I'm like this was I was young it was like right after his season yeah not even having a clue I'd

ever be on that show yeah but I guess dreams really do come true just not with Ben but yeah I really liked Ben's season two. He had a good one. Yeah, the whole Courtney villain thing. It was just such good TV. And now we're both involved with Bachelor Canada in some way. And isn't it hilarious how they try and make the villains? Like, they're like just nice girls. They're so nice. The villain like wrote The Bachelor a quick sentence note and left it in his room. Like it was actually really cute. Yeah. It was two sentences. Yeah. Yeah. It was like, hey, I'll be thinking about you. Yeah. It was insane. And then they're like, well, she's the villain. I feel like she got a leg up. Yeah. I'm like, Oh, my gosh, that's your villain.

Yeah. And I liked how she defended herself. She was like, I don't think a two-sentence note is really going to have an impact. She was funny. I actually really liked her on that. I wish, don't you wish that people in America could watch the Canadian Bachelor? I do. And I get asked that every week and I don't know why they have it like geo-blocked or something.

But why? Let the people. Hours that be, listen. Yeah. Let the Americans watch. That villain, actually. Brittany is from Calgary. Yeah, she is.

Albertan. Two hours away from my hometown, Le Duc. And that sound French, it's not. It does sound French. It does not French. It's one of those poorest cities that you drive through and you're like, bleh. Is it really? Oh, it's terrible.

How many people? You know, it's actually gotten pretty big now because it's really close to Edmonton. It's, like, I remember it being 20,000 people. Oh, wow. Yeah. That is small. That's small. Yeah.

Like one high school. Wow. Yeah. Are you like a huge, do you ever go back? Oh, yeah, I go back a lot. Okay. And are you like this massive celeb? Well, I don't like.

Be honest. Be honest. You know what? Yes and no. Like, I think I was just like always, you know, dancing and dance competitions and taught dance there and, you know, went to the only high school. I feel like people still feel like they kind of know me. Okay. So I'm like almost like a relatable.

I do feel like that's part of your charm. do in general, which I want. Yeah, of course. Yeah. Like, I like that people feel that way because I don't want to be put on, like, I don't want to be thought of as this like untouchable celebrity because I'm not. I'm recognizable. Mm-hmm.

But I'm not, you're not a celebrity coming off relative to be. But yeah, I want to be, I want people who knew me in high school or knew me in Vancouver to now also be like, oh, she's never changed. Like, she's matured a little bit. I needed to grow up a little bit. But I'm still the same person. I think that's honestly one of the best traits, and I think that's such, like, I can say that about you because, you know, we got, we met, like, what on, through the text. Yeah, before you being a bachelorette.

And just, like, you just, I obviously didn't know you way back when, but I feel like you have never changed. Yeah. And people I talk to say you've never changed. And it's just, I think that's very important. I just, you were well raised. I was. Yeah. Props, mom and dad.

Yeah. Good job. Pat on the old back. Yeah. But, yeah, I did. And that was something that I really think helped me find Sean is that I'm like, if I say exactly who I am throughout everything and make mistakes or be weird and have all these quirks and stuff, like he's going to fall in love with that. Yeah, you attract someone who actually loves you for you. It makes complete sense.

When people try to play games, I'm like, oh, God, that's such a waste of energy. The playing games, exactly, waste of energy, also you're not going to find someone who loves you for you. you're only going to trick them for a certain amount of time and then you're just going to be exhausted and then they're going to see through it. Yeah. Like, just, I'm such a preacher for being who you are. Yeah.

So I feel about, I'm going to make a really superficial metaphor for that. Like eyelash extensions, which I love, but I had to quit. It's like, why would you start a relationship off with eyelash extensions? Because then when you, you know what I mean? Because you're like, you're not being actually naked. Try being the bachelorette. You're done up to the nines every single date. Um, and you have to, you know, you're getting your hair and makeup done every single day.

Yeah. And I remember, um, waking up the first day after, with no hair makeup, took out all my extensions. Yeah. I had nothing. And I had bald spots from so. Oh. Yes. And waking up and being like, oh, my gosh, Sean is going to see this for the first time. Yeah. And he was like, oh my gosh. Why don't, don't ever put those extensions back in. And you, like, love the, like, natural beauty. And I'm like, oh, my God, I picked the right guy. That's so cute.

Yeah, it was. But it was, that's funny because... I know what you mean. Yeah. Because you want, you also want people to just see your natural face. Yeah, your natural face and your natural self and just your, you're true everything. You're not supposed to wake up with full-blown lashes. No.

Eyebrows another story. I'll tattoo those babies on for the rest of my career. But eyelashes totally get it. Yeah. I like a first. fresh face. Me too. Yeah.

And Lauren Bushnell said this on the podcast, is she thinks that natural beauty actually is going to make a comeback. Oh, I agree with that. I do, too. I hope she's right. I hope she's right, too. Because you know that whole, I don't, I'm not, again, I've never want to bash anybody or take down what they do.

But the Anastasia eyebrows, she's like a big eyebrow group in. That's a four, yeah, like I live a line. And so her Instagram page, I had to stop following because it was like basically. changing who you are what your face looks like for makeup and it would show like half of your face not done and half your face done yeah and i would be like why would girls want to do that and it became a trend but it really i don't maybe it's because i unfollowed it i don't see it anymore but i'm like is that even a thing anymore but people were really like the whole contour cakeing the makeup on completely changing your face totally drawing things on i was like what supposed to be there

the contouring is crazy it's crazy yeah and i was i had to stop following her because i was like wait, you're actually promoting, like, changing your face, but also it's your art, so I understand that side, too. Like, it's art to her, and she probably doesn't do it in this way where she wants to be like, don't be who you are. It's just she enjoys makeup. Yeah, but there's a difference between, like, I don't know, improving on or like, you know, adjusting and completely changing. That's true. Yeah, yeah. It just was a bit much.

But, yes, I really do think natural beauty should make a comeback. Yes. And I do think guys like it. Not that that's what we should do it for. No, I completely agree. I do think it's beautiful to them. Yes. Because nobody wants to see like a caked-on face and then be like, oh, wait, who are you?

And then next you'd be like, wait, that's not what you look like in. And honestly, I would not want to be with that guy. No, no. Yeah. A guy that, like a guy who wants the, you know, totally done up, bimbo. Yeah, no. There are those guys out there, but yeah, no. Long extensions, like bleach blonde hair, like everything is just like, I would not want to be with that guy.

Because then so much pressure. So much pressure. And then it goes back to what we were saying that you can't be yourself. Yeah. And then when you are, maybe he doesn't like you. Mm-hmm. Ugh. I'm exhausted talking about it.

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We'll be back with more Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow. Hey guys, it's me, Corinne. I got a new podcast on Podcast One called So Random with me, Corinne. Tune in for the good, the bad, the ugly, and even embarrassing. Peen your pants convoes all the way, unfiltered, oh yeah. Download new episodes every Thursday at Podcast1.com, the new Podcast One app, or subscribe at Apple Podcasts. Now back to Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow.

Okay, we have to get the confessional booth. I can't believe we haven't even got there yet. I was so flustered from the New York traffic getting here and I'm all off my A game today. Okay, confessional booth. Do you start? I'm going to start just because I want to get this out of the way because it's so gross. I had to blame a toot on Tucker the other day because it was that bad

that Sean was like mortified at Tucker like mortified he was like oh my oh God did something die and I was like it was foul it was so foul and I was sitting there being like that came out of me oh my God and so I'm like saying there and I'm like yeah you might have to take Tucker out because he just assumed it came from Tucker yeah because it was

like it was not human It was not human And I was like I don't get embarrassed In front of Sean about anything Like I would toot in front of him I don't care But I was like

Oh my gosh I cannot let him know That that came out of my body And so he like He was like Oh God I gotta get out of this room He went and got Tucker's leash He's like he must have to go to the bathroom

He took him outside And I was like Oh my god Did he do a doo? Yeah I don't remember actually I'm like I don't know

Okay I'm just curious If your story kind of like lined up I'm invested Well now Sean knows that it was me But he totally listens to my podcast Not to go on a tangent

Yes go But this is a bit of a roundabout story You mentioned that you're not afraid to To in front of each other No Would you burp in front of each other? I don't know how to burp You never

It's the weirdest weirdest thing You've never burped I've burped like twice in my life And it was when I was throwing up Oh my God Yeah I don't know how But Sean burbs in front of me all the time Okay

I want to burp Yeah I can't. Like, if somebody could teach me, I'd be so impressed. I cannot whistle. Oh, you can't? Oh, me either. I can only make this, like, I can only make this like loon call. It's like, whew!

Oh, that's a whistle. It's not a whistle. It's a poor whistle. It's a sad, sad whistle. It's a poor man's whistle. Okay, wow, tangents. Yes. Okay, so, so, I mean, every relationship is different.

Andy and I don't burp or fart in front of each other. Wait, hold up, pump the brakes. And you will tell each other sex dreams about other men and what, but you won't burp in front of each other? Well, like, it's not that we, like, if it comes out, I'm not going to be like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. It's just, like, I'll make an effort. We both make an effort to sort of not, I don't know, every relationship is different.

No, that, I'm just. I do not burp or fart with abandon in front of my husband. I get that because it's not like all, like, ripped toots everywhere and be like, like, I try to still be somewhat sexy and attractive to him. So I get what you're saying, but I think burping is, like, funny. Yeah, I know what you, I know what you mean. We're not, like, it's not, like, a strict rule. But it's there.

It exists. Yes. Like, to give you an idea, we don't even, so luckily, we have two bathrooms in our apartment. Yeah. But, like, we call number two making a flower. Oh, my gosh, this is amazing. Yeah, so, I mean, this is basically a confession. So it's like, like, if we're downstairs and he goes upstairs to go to the bathroom,

I'm like, are you making a flower? Like, I'm making fun of them. Yeah, that's nice, though. Yeah, because we never actually say, it's not like, oh, are you taking a dump? Well, we don't say that. We say board meeting. I'm like, oh, it's 8 a.m. Time for a board meeting.

Oh, that's great. And then we go to the bathroom and it's our board meeting. Oh, that's really great. So that's what we call it. Yeah. I mean, I think that every relationship should have a. It is weird to say, like, oh, I'm going to go drop one. But also on that same note, I will push him in the bathroom after I go and be like,

Ha-ha. So. So where's the line? I don't know. I had a point with all the... Oh, yeah. Okay. So since listening, I listened to your podcast with Wells.

Yes. And you talked about the documentary, What the Hell. Yes. And so I made the mistake of watching that. Yeah. Oh, gosh. And now you're vegan. And so now for four days now I have been vegan.

Yeah. But so one of the unfortunate side effects of veganism is... Toots? Toots. Oh, really? Is that a thing? Well, yeah. So, Andy and I have both been, like, yesterday.

Because your body's adjusting to something new. Well, so apparently the antibiotics and the meat you consume, like, kill the, like, probiotics in your gut or something. Was this on the documentary or? No, but, I mean, it was such a. You've done your research. It was such an issue in our household that Andy Google did. And so, yeah, it was just sort of like, it kind of all came to a head because we were, like, quite careful about tooting in front of each other. And then you're like, oh, God.

And then you both are dying of stomach aches. Yeah. Oh. Yeah. So you've done it for four days now, vegan. Four days, yeah. Okay. Is that, wait, is this your confession?

The two? No. No, because I can just play off that for a second. Feel free. That's actually not my confession. Let me piggyback you on that. I have not had meat in over 10 days now. That's, I mean, incredible.

Because same thing. Like, well, first of all, Sean. very knowledgeable about health and wellness and he does his meal plans and he wants to be knowledgeable in all like realms yeah of um food and nutrition so he gets a lot of requests and meal plans for um like vegan or vegetarian so he wants to try it just to not so he's not just slapping a meal plan out that like oh here it's no meat that he actually has knowledge and knows how it makes you feel and and knows if it is right for certain people's bodies yeah so we have been trying it and 10 days yeah that's impressive it is

impressive. I'm not saying I'll never eat a McDonald's cheeseburger again. Is this the second compliment you're accepting today? Yes, thank you. Thank you. That's like, um, Beyonce was on The View once and they're like, you are Beyonce and she said, thank you. And I was like, can I get to that level? Oh my gosh, you're Caitlin Brissot. Thank you.

Thank you. That's great. Yeah. I like that about Sean. He's like conscious of that. Because there are a lot of guys that are like bros and they're like, yum meat. Like bacon is a vegetable. Like, oh, I'm going to that shit. Yeah. And it's just,

I like that he's willing to do that. Like, I love that Andy is willing to try this with me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I love that too. Like,

just if you're willing to try something with your partner. Yeah. And it's something they want to do. I think that's really great. Like at first when Sean was doing that, I'm like, are you kidding me? You eat meat for every meal. Yeah.

And he's like, well, I'm not saying I'm not going to eat meat anymore. I'm trying it because I want to be knowledgeable for people wanting meal plans for me. And I'm like, oh, that's actually really smart. He wants to see how he feels too. Yes.

Yeah. I feel like I'm not eating enough now. Okay. Like I feel like I need to eat more. Yeah. Okay. And then I'm like... This is kind of how I feel right now.

And I usually eat like little amounts often through the whole day anyways. I'm the same. But I'm like, I'm starving all the time now. Yeah. I feel the same way. Or like I'll eat to the point where I'm like more full than I normally would eat. Yeah. And then an hour later I'm like, okay, I could go for some more food.

Right. Yeah. Yeah, that's how I'm feeling too. But I mean, yeah. what the health will get you. Yeah, it really will. It really will get you. Yes.

Okay, now tell me an actual confession. Okay, so you talked about this, again, at the live podcast, about how, at the time you had not showered in four days. It's actually kind of gross, like, how far I will stretch that situation. Oh, yeah. And the hair washing. Oh, hair washing. I will go until, like, the day, until someone's like, do you. I actually, I once did an opera where, like, the girl who's doing my hair, I arrived and I was like, I'm so sorry.

really yeah because it had been like almost a week and like normally like if I'm just doing my own hair I'll do a week easy easy but when someone else is touching my head right and she was like no no you're good you don't have head fat yet what head fat what does that mean like apparently that's like you know you start to get a little oh there's some stuff stuff yeah head fat yeah so yeah it's but that's weekly hair wash just that gross you're the same not even that's not even gross It's good for your hair It's great for your hair

Okay I honestly I try to only wash my hair once a week But I usually have to go too Just because it gets that greasy Yeah But here's what's so funny I guess this can be in

No it's not really confession It's just funny Because on that live podcast I was talking about how I was like Oh no I just took a wipe And like wiped down there Yeah Did you get the sponsorship?

So I go to the theater yesterday And go to my dressing room And there's a package there for me From Cotonel And I'm like, what is this? And then I'm like, this is weird. They were wet wipes. Yeah.

So, Sean uses, sorry, Sean. But he uses butt wipes all the time. And so, I mean, it's just like they're just in our bathroom all the time. But our cleaning lady used all of his butt wipes to clean the toilet. Okay. That's a bold move. Bold move. I was like, oh, okay.

You might want to replace. And so I get to the theater. I get to my dress room. I see this. And I'm like, nobody knows we ran out of butt wipes. Like, what's going on here? I open it. And there's another.

and it says, we listen to your podcast, and we wanted to send you some, like, personal whites. That's amazing. And I was like, glorious. Like, I got a fanny pack and to-go ones. I got packages, like, tubs of them. I'm really happy about it. That's great. So thank you.

They came in the nick of time. And, you know, that's smart on their part because they know that's funny and they know I'll talk about it on the podcast. Here we are talking about it. You know, they get some air time. Yeah. It worked out for everyone. Yeah. Okay, do you have another confession or is that?

I have one more, and I feel like it might be a little weird. No? Nothing is weird on this podcast. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Okay, so I'm one of those people that when I get home, it's like top priority. Yeah. I'm in my PJs.

Yes, totally get it. Take the bra off. I might have to pee like crazy. I'm not going to pee first. I'm not going to write that email I needed to write. I'm not going to do any of things. It's like I'm in my pajamas. First thing.

Get it. But so my thing is, I have many parents. or is the pajama pants. Yeah. I like to wear my pajama pants commando. Is that weird? I'm sorry. Is this your weird confession?

That is so normal. Is it really? Because it's just like, it's just like, I'm not wearing out of room right now. Okay. I'm not. Okay. Are you serious? Yeah.

Oh, I love you. I'm not wearing a bra either. Look. I don't have to with these small puppies. Well, a bra is a different. They don't call me no bristos for no reason. That was a good callback. I liked that.

Well done. Thank you. My comedic timing. Some would say is. genius. No, but I really, I don't like wearing undergarments. Yeah. It's just so confining. Yeah. It's straining. No, I totally get it. I can't believe that's your confession. You are so like, oh, I just don't know if that's weird or not. You're such a classy lady. Don't say, here's the thing. Like, everyone thinks I'm so classy, but I feel like

I'm actually kind of gross. No, you're not gross. You're normal. And you are. And that's why people love you. You are. That is just because I sing opera. You're right. That might be it. I think that there's, yeah, it's like these rose-colored glasses. It's like, oh, everything she says is so like classy and wise it's like because you sing off that i seriously think that's what it is well own it i'm oh i am owning that shit hell yeah but you can also be gross and classy i'm gonna go with that i'm grassy you're grassy i love that i am grassy that is a new term that we're using so yes you do sing up okay oh this is what i want to tell you i went to your husband's Instagram page and saw the video of you singing. Oh. Oh, my freaking land to Georgia. That is

like the most insane. I didn't even know those notes were possible to hit. Oh. And I really want everybody to go stock his Instagram and go to that video because are you like, no, I'm fine with that. No, he's, he's good about it. He's always on my case. Everyone actually is on my case about posting more singing stuff. Yes. Oh my gosh. Why don't you? When I post singing stuff, I lose followers. What? Yeah, people don't care. Well, then who needs them? I don't know. It kind of makes me insecure. I know it's really, it's just such a far cry, like, culturally from Bachelor Nation.

Right. So I very rarely post singing things. Oh, but, okay, I have to stop you. Don't do that if you just are worried about losing followers because, well, not that you're just worried about that. I don't make that the only reason. I get it because. It just makes me feel like, oh, should I not be posting? It feels like vain. No, no.

It's like, oh, I sang this really well, so, like, I want you to all. see it you should be gaining followers from that voice but i totally get that and i've had this conversation with other people even just in bachelor the bachelor world um same thing like if i think as whitney laughed one time she was like oh you should have seen i she lost like thousands and thousands of followers when her and chris broke up and she was like what so people like you know it is it it hurts your feelings because you're like i'm sharing something with you that's me and that's something i'm proud of And you see it and actually go out of your way to be like, unfollow. Yeah.

That hurts feeling. Totally. Especially in that case where it's like, she was just a half of something. Yeah. Yeah, I know. That's really gross. It is. Yeah.

But that's Instagram. Yeah, it is. Going back to that whole thing. It's gross. And that's why I'm like, oh my gosh, when I have children, I want to be so aware of how I'm speaking about Instagram around them and likes and being accepted and everything because I don't. Even my niece, I'm like, oh, my gosh, she took a picture or something. And she goes, how many likes? And I was like, oh, no, no.

And she did not care about that. I don't even think she cares. I think that's just like a natural sentence to follow a picture for kids these days. Yes. Like, oh, it broke my heart. But I'm so, yeah. Wait, so question. Yes.

Do you think that when you have a kid, okay, I mean, I'm not going to talk about babies or anything. No, we can talk about babies. Oh, can't wait. Oh, really? Oh, you're really maternal. Yeah, I love babies. Everyone's asking me about babies. I'm like,

okay. That gives me full-blown anxiety. I lose sleep at night thinking about having a teenager. But babies and being a mom, oh, my God, I can't wait. Really? Yes.

Okay. But I understand that it's not for everybody. Okay, so, I mean, when you get married, apparently, even if it's only been two months, everyone's like so. Well, that's like being engaged and everyone wants to know when you get married.

And then you have a kid and then they're like, when's the next one? Yeah, that'll never stop. It's endless. Uh-huh. I guess the question is, is Instagram around for, like another two years, five years, ten years. For my career, I really hope.

Yeah. I mean, it's certainly, yeah, it's not hurting. I know. I just think, I do like that everybody's starting to have more of a conversation and being aware about how, like, ridiculous it is. And that we can all, like, look at it for what it is. Yes. And know that that's not real life. And even if we do shed some tears or be, like, hormonal or anything that we're being, we can also know that that's ridiculous. Yes. So I think as long as we just keep having that conversation, about Instagram and what truly means things to people or like what actually becomes

like valued to you. Yeah. And that it doesn't have to be a good Instagram picture. Like as long as you can separate the two. Like Instagram, fine. Yes, you have to have nice Instagram pictures and we all want to make it look pretty and we all want likes and we all want comments and we all want to make money off of it.

Yeah. It's the dream. But also like let's separate it and be like, let's not real life. Yes. Use it for what it is. Yeah. I was at an event last night where this this blur who's such a lovely person she's so she's killing it

and she has like tons of followers organically like she did not go on TV like she's just on it and it's really I'm really amazed yes and um and um I told her that she asked me what I was doing for Christmas and I was like oh I'm going up to

Montrembla in Quebec to ski and snowboard and she's like oh my god you should go dog sledding and I'm like dog sledding is that something like I've gone to trouble like every year my like for my entire life I'm like I've never gone dog sledding she's like for the photo And I was like, that sounds like a lot of work. It is a lot of work.

Yeah. And I'm not knocking her. Like she's lovely and she's killing it. It's just so crazy to me that you would like. Because it becomes a business. Yes. It really does become a business. And that's, I am like, oh man, ask Sean, I am the laziest, laziest person you'll ever meet.

Like I have like motivation for certain things and I have drive for certain things and I'm passionate about certain things. but like for a photo I'm like I can't I just I'd like to think that it like still falls in the realm of reality something you would do yeah yeah yes yeah you don't go out of your way to do it for like maybe if I'm snowboarding like I'll get someone to take a photo with a phone I'm not going to bring a photographer down the slopes which I know some people would do it yeah yeah it's just so next level it's like everything is amplified and it's like I respect the hustle yes you know I really do and maybe I'm talking like this because I don't share that hustle. But that's it. But that's how I feel too. I respect it, but I don't get it. Like, I'm like, good for you because, and that is, again, a business. But I just don't have it in me to get, like, my makeup done for, like, you know. Shoot for no reason. Right. Just to like put it up there. Yeah, yeah. No. Put it out into the world. I fully, I have, it's such a love hate with me. Like, I have moments where I really wish I had it. I want to challenge you to a real Instagram. What's a real Instagram? Charlene. Oh, wait, is that the one where you don't have... The raw beauty. Oh, I know about this. Yeah.

I mean, you're just so stunning. I actually did one. I think it was raw beauty. I did one with no face on. Oh, you did? Yeah, it was way back when. It's, they're based in Vancouver, right? Yeah.

Oh, do another one. Okay, I will. I will do another one. This is just going so well. We have to get to the Kenny nuts, but I just love our conversation. I knew I would, too. You're so easy to talk to you. Aw.

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I'm, uh, we probably don't, but I can ask you this after the podcast. I just want to know, like, places in New York. But, okay, speaking of New York, uh, can you not? I feel like it's full of people with no patience like myself. I have, no, I do not have patience. And that's why I'm like, I hope a kid will teach me patience because that is something that I really struggle with is patience. Uh-huh.

So New York City is not my jam. Uh-huh. I mean, I love where we're living because it's a little bit out there. We're by you and, but it's like a nice little area. Yeah. down here in the in the madness yeah anyways that actually has nothing to do with my can you knots my can you nots my can you not is dedicated to elevator assholes oh elevator because it reminds me being in a big city i'm all the sudden back in an apartment all the time here yeah i'm always in an elevator and in nashville i'm like i kind of forgot when an elevator was so i thought we would do can you not elevator additions very appropriate i have a lot of i bet you do because you live in new y York and it was funny. I went to a comedy club last night and they were talking about a couple elevator things. Which one did you go to? Um, comedy, um, seller. Oh, oh, nice. Andy has a lot of friends

that do. Oh my gosh. I, it was one of the best nights ever just because I love comedians. I love stand-up comedians. There's this one girl. Oh my God. Jessica, I have to give her a shout out. I tweeted her because I was like, she was the funniest comedian and like actually the funniest comedian I think I've I love that you said comedian and not like female comedian. I love that you didn't need to specify. Yeah, no. Well, because I feel like a lot of people categorize them differently. Oh, no.

No. She was hilarious. So, it's a tough time for comedians. Okay, 2017 is a tough year to be a comedian because people are sensitive AF. Yes. Like, more sensitive than ever before. So I was sitting there being like, I am finding everything hilarious, but can I? I'm being judged for thinking this is funny.

because it's so offside, but I love offside humor. Her name is Jessica Kirsten, K-I-R-S-O-N. Okay. Yeah. You can play back. I love her. She's actually a friend of mine. I love her.

She's cray-K-K-K-K-E-K-K-K-K. Oh, my God. I started bowing down to her when she came off the stage because I was like, I don't want to just give her claps. Yeah, she deserves more. She deserves more than a clap. And I started bowing down to her and then I was like, and she was like, thank you. And then it was honestly so funny. And it wasn't, it wasn't Jessica that had the funny elevator stuff.

But one guy mentioned like one thing in passing in his skit about elevators. And I was like, ooh, that is my can you not for my podcast because elevators drive me nuts in general. Like I already have, yeah, I already have anxiety being in a small box like alone, let alone mix in some assholes. Yeah. Not even assholes, like just awkward people. Yeah. So my can you not, to start off, is when people click that freaking button, like the elevator's going to come down quicker if they hit it eight times rather than just once. It's like they're in such a hurry in New York.

I fit in because I have no patience and everyone's like, blah, blah, but people hit the button and then the elevator's coming down and then they hit it a few more times. And I'm like, that's not actually going to make the elevator come down faster. Can you know? Yeah. Okay. So mine is when you're, it's a pretty packed elevator and you're. you're probably in a rush because you usually are in the city. And the doors are like taking their sweet-ass time closing.

And then you see someone coming towards it. And then the person near the buttons decides to be a hero. Yep. And speak for everyone in that elevator and like open the door. And you're like, no. Yeah. They can wait for the next. It drives me nuts.

Yes. That is a can you not for sure. You don't need to be a hero. Don't be a hero. Don't be a hero. That, okay. I can keep going by the way. Oh, we will.

We're going to go back and forth here. because this is a can you not only for elevators but people who know me know I hate this can you not talk about the weather oh yeah I can't stand guilty of the oh you are this morning no because so normal there's only 12 units in our building it's going down the elevator and then they stopped at three and I was like oh damn it take the damn fair three are you're on three yeah it's two points so she comes in and then I'm like and she had her coat on and I was kind of like, you know, it's just so, it's this awkward silence. I understand it's a natural, like, I was like, do you have an umbrella?

It's supposed to rain today. And then I immediately hated myself. Well, see, self-aware. You were self-aware. As long as you hated yourself after I'm cool. I could not handle the awkward silence. I understand that, but I would rather awkward silence over weather talk. And like, this guy in the elevator the other day goes, can you believe the weather?

I'm like, yeah? Yes, I can. Yeah, actually. Okay. To be fair, I live in the building with this woman. I know this woman. Do you sit in awkward silence with someone you peripherally know? No. If it's a stranger, I have no issue with the silence. I would find something other than the weather to talk about. Like I'd be like, oh, where'd you get your jacket? It's so cute.

But what if it's not cute? Then you lie. And then after you go and tell your friends, like mean girls, like, I hate that. No, I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. I've ever seen. No. But I don't. If. I understand it. I'll give you the pass. Okay. Thank you.

I need it. I do understand it. It's just a pet peeve of mine. And it's like, what do you mean? Can you believe the weather? Do you believe in God? Yeah. Oh, but you can't fathom the weather right now.

Like, that's something that you can't process. Come on. Okay. Okay. So mine is, if you're not sure. Oh, yeah. Can I have two and one? Or can we keep going?

Of course. There is no rules on Off the Vine. Find out. where you're going. Before you press the damn button. It's so obvious. Really? Yeah, like, I was in sacks the other day where it's like got like 12 floors and

the elevators are all crammed. Yeah. These two girls come in and they're like, oh, like women. Oh, that, yes. Jackets. And then they're like, I think it's four. No, maybe it's five. And so they like press all three of them. No. And then it opens at each floor and they like kind of take a step out to look around. They're like, no, no, no, no, this one is

in it. And then they get back in the elevator. and go another floor and do it again. No. Yeah, no, that would really grind my gears. Yeah, it did. It did grind my gears. Oh, that would for sure grind my gears. Yeah.

Can you not? Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Okay. Can you not be afraid of my cute golden retriever sitting politely in the corner? Like, a woman was so terrified. By the way, you live in a building where, like, dogs are so accepted and loved. And in a city.

And in a city. Yeah. And there's dogs everywhere. Yes. And in a neighborhood, Upper West Side, there's a dog everywhere. Everywhere. Everywhere. And she was like in the corner, like shaking, basically.

And Tucker was just like happy to see her, but then he sat down. And she was scared. And I don't understand when people are like scared of dogs that are nice. Yeah. Like if the dog was like, you know, like crazy and growling at you and like look like it was going to talk, sure, be scared. But when the golden retriever is just happy to see you and like, you're in the wrong city. You're in the wrong city. Yeah.

And the wrong. elevator bitch yeah this is in your building yes oh man I couldn't believe it that's the thing like what is she I feel like every day she's got to share an elevator with the dog and she was on the third floor oh no those third floor I'm like you're that there's dogs everywhere in this building yeah take the stairs yeah unless she has like a back issue or health issue fine mm-hmm fine yeah but you know you never know we don't know her I know because I did say that one time I was like I got mad at people who take the elevator on like the same floor And then I got a couple people who had back injuries or problems with their legs.

And they're like, you bitch. And I was like, oh. PC. Can't please everybody. Okay, I have one more. And it's more just the concept of elevators. It's not like the person. Just when you're in a big rush, you're in the elevator.

And someone comes in and they press the button. Boller right. I know. Oh, it drives me nuts. And it's like they're not to blame. No, because that's the floor. But in that moment, I hate it. I hate when people press the floor below me.

But then I also hate the people. above me because I'm like, oh, you think you're better than me? That's really no way. Oh, you're a little bit high. You can't win with me on an elevator is basically what I'm getting at. Pretty much. You can't. Like, everything you do on an elevator is going to annoy me.

Yes. Even if you sit there in silence, I'm going to be like, oh, you don't want to talk about the weather. I'm just kidding. No, but I'm like, I'll find something wrong. Yeah. I'll find a can you not just from you standing there. Yeah. It's a pressure cooker.

You're trapped in a space going up and down. And I've been stuck in an elevator before, like, had to get firemen to come. Oh my God, like in the movies. Yeah. Oh, wait, so I'm impressed to even get in them. Yeah. And it was a fear of mine, too. And you know what?

Something strange came over my body, and I actually became really calm. Really? Yeah. I think I, like, knew, like, you could go one of two ways, Caitlin. You're either going to have a full-blown meltdown panic attack and freak everybody out and die. Yeah. Or you can just stay extremely calm knowing that you're not going to die in this elevator and, like, help us on the way. Yeah.

It's a really, like, pivotal moment for me. I want to do a circle back. Okay, do it. I'm all about the story. For your show. Yes. Do you feel that way a bit when you're like nervous, you have to go on? And then do you feel like a wave of calm?

Like you just know what you got to do? Yes. Yes. I think because growing up dancing, I was a competitive dancer. My whole life, I had competitions like every weekend. Yeah. And I was always on stage. I love being on stage.

Yeah. I just, you can probably relate. Yeah. And I'll be so nervous. And then that curtain dropped. and we start singing, and I'm just like, I am where I'm supposed to be. Yeah. And it just feels so right.

Yeah. So you feed off it. Feed off of it. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. They're like... But you dread it. You dread it, but then in the moment you feed off it.

Yes. And like, some days I'll be like, I'm so tired. I don't want to do it. Then I get there and I get nervous and I dread it. And then I get on stage and I'm like, there's nowhere else I'd rather be. Yeah. And you're not nervous and you're not tired. No.

You have all the energy you need. All the energy in the world. Yeah. It's crazy. Yeah. I would love to come see you sing live sometime if... I'll let you know. Please.

I rarely sing in the city, but... Why not? You should audition for, like, freaking Phantom of the Opera with that voice. I mean, there would be one role I would sing in that. Which one? Carlyta, the actual opera singer. Yes, yes.

I love that movie. Oh, I watched the movie several times. I haven't seen it on Broadway. Really? No. Oh, you should. I mean, classic. I only get one day off,

and that day I fly to Toronto for Bachelor Canada. I'm aware. That's crazy. But this week, is my last week so yeah because it's the finale wait is there no women tell all yeah there is and it's a finale i think so i don't know if they're doing it all at once or yeah do you like hosting the after show love it yeah yeah i have so much fun you are such a natural i really just like enjoy i just don't feel um i feel nerves and whatever but i don't feel pressure yeah

and i just feel like i i like having input and i feel like i'm not like a mean-spirited person i feel like i'm like i like putting in my two cents and well that's truly an art i've got to say I'm not blowing smoke up your ass again, but the fact that you can be funny without being mean. I feel like that's not... It's really important to me. It's an issue now the days. I feel like it's hard to be funny without being.

People are usually mean funny. Which I can laugh at mean funny too. Oh, believe it. Sometimes mean funny really... It's like family guy humor to me is like so mean and crosses so many lines. But I'm like, I can respect the humor because it's like, I don't believe that those people actually mean these things. They can say things that are funny and still not mean them.

But I... My humor to me is like, I'm very sarcastic or I'm like witty, but I never want to be mean. And if I am, I definitely don't mean it. Yeah. I feel like you're the kind of person that would feel bad afterwards. I'd feel terrible. And it's happened. Like where you have like remorse.

Yeah. It's happened. Where it was almost unintentional and you're like, oh, I want to take that back. Like I said it for the shock value. Uh-huh. And then I'm like, dang. And you probably got laughs out of it. Yeah.

And then I've hurt feelings. And then I was like, shit. Then there was, like, a hangover. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, again, that's sort of like me mentioning the weather in the elevator. At least you're self-aware. But now I feel like I've helped you where you're not even going to go there.

Oh, I'm not. You're going to find everything else. In the most awkward of silence. Like, even be like, you can be in the elevator and be like, oh, shit, the weather talk's coming up. I can feel it. And then you can be like, oh, there's a camera watching us. I think they're like, you know, just go somewhere else. Yeah.

Mundane to talk about. Yeah. I don't know. elevator talk it's it's there's never can you not it's a great can you not I feel very lucky to have gotten this can you not it was a great one and I you know what and we could keep going because if anyone wants to

tweet us some elevator can you guys I'm still open to talking about this totally totally open to it you commiserate you bond over the hatred of things yes absolutely yeah what else you're supposed to bond over happiness you

happiness and joy okay gosh I guess we got to wrap this up That's so sad This is like This is fun It's so fun

And I hate when I look over And it's like Dang that I love when it goes by that fast No yeah totally It's great So last we're going to close it with this Well we'll close it with a couple things But I really feel like

You're an empowering women I really like empowering women And I want you to just give If you could give any listeners out there Any advice I hate when girls are like I'm waiting for Mr. Wright And my life doesn't feel complete

I'm like, don't wait. Go do your thing. You'll find him. He's going to come. And if he doesn't, it's just like something else is out there for you. Yeah. But what would be your advice to like younger girls listening or not even younger, just women in general listening that maybe feel lost and they are like worried they're out of time? Oh, that is such a good question.

And I actually have, I do have a very clear answer to that. Oh, yeah. I knew you would. I think there is an epidemic of women. Feeling entitled to perfection or like just knowing. And I don't want to downplay how perfect your relationship can be. Right. Because I know that we're both in very happy, long-term relationships.

And I'm sure Sean has many flaws. Yeah, of course. Yeah, just as Andy has many flaws. Of course. And the guy that you end up with doesn't necessarily, is not necessarily going to come in the package you expect him to come in. Yeah. I just think women really limit themselves when they think that they will find,

fine there, tall, dark, handsome, full head of hair, really funny, great job. Oh, and family money. Yeah. Like, all, that's along with my friends. Yeah. You know, get your priorities in order, like, what do you need versus what do you want? We all want six two with a full head of hair and a lot of money. Yeah. We don't need six two with a full head of hair and a lot of money. So true. So I feel like what do you need in a relationship, whether that be the compatibility, um, same values. If you need a lot of money, then great. But then seek that out.

But be willing to sacrifice compatibility or same family values, like things like that. I just think that women want it all. So true. When they should have a list of like a short list of three to five things that they cannot live without. I like that. It's very humble of you. I mean, it's very realistic.

You are very realistic. I respect that. And that's great advice. That is really, I wish somebody would have told me that years ago. Well, I mean, it worked out for you. You did get the tall, full head of hair, great job. Oh, you got all the things. I know you're like this now. You're not really my audience here.

But I just really think that that's, yeah, an issue. Same with age. I feel like a lot of people like will ride off because of age. I know. I hate that. I hate the age thing. It's just a number. It really is.

The only thing to be concerned about is if, like, they're going to die 30 years before you. They're like, you know, if it's that extreme. But that's the only thing. I hate the age thing. Yes. Because everybody is so different. And there's so many mature younger people out there. And there's so many immature, older people out there.

And it just depends on the person, not the age. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. I usually end with a joke and I didn't think of one today. Oh, my gosh. Now I'm being put on the spot. What can be my joke? Do you have a joke?

I'm really bad. Oh, I'm really great with jokes. Oh, yeah. I'm looking at you. I'm relying on you still in no pressure. I feel like maybe I can get away with this one. but it's also, like, really inappropriate. Oh, perfect.

Okay. Go there, Caitlin. I'm going there. You're not going to have a hangover. Are you? Remoris? Well, if I do, I'll just edit it up. Okay.

What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? I don't know. What did she say? Can I go there? Yes. Is that, was that bad? Yes, no, that was awesome. Okay.

Okay, that's my joke. Oh, my gosh. That is, like, rated R. I don't feel like if there's any, like, really young girls out there, they can, like, don't read too much into them. And it was great. I'm like sweating now. No. No, it was amazing.

It's perfect. It's good? Okay, we'll end it on that then. Oh my gosh, we didn't even get to questions from people. Oh, are we on like a hard out here? Do we have somebody coming in after? Why is my alarm going off? That's a good question.

There's only a couple because. I'm glad your highlights are good. Really? Yeah. Oh, thanks. They're so like skinny. This got, apparently the little thin highlights are coming back in. They should be.

Yeah. How much did you try? drop off your hair. Like almost six inches. Oh my gosh. It was like to hear. Oh my gosh. That must be amazing. And actually it was funny because I told Andy I was like, I'm going to be cutting my hair. Like just prepare yourself. Yeah. He's like, oh, that's fine. As long as it still covers your boobs. I'm like, you're delusional. Like, do you know what? First of all, like, how few girls can grow their hair this long. My hair doesn't grow past this. Yeah. Yeah. And first of all, like, that quality of the hair down there is like disgusting. Dead. Yeah. It's

like ratty. Oh my gosh. I was like, you could. It will not be. It will not be covering my boobs anymore. Live with it. Oh, my gosh. And he probably loves it. He's like, it's like a mermaid. So simple. I get that.

I get it. It is very mermaid-y. Okay. Just because I think you'll have an interesting answer and I think I could take a lot from it. But I always think about marriage and like there's so much pressure obviously on us to get married, but we don't really feel the pressure otherwise we'd be married right now. But I keep thinking like what is marriage to me and like what will I gain from it? Like, why do I choose it and all these things?

So I wanted to know what marriage means to you. That's a really good question. Yeah. I'm about to reveal something that probably isn't, like, out there. Okay. So, Andy and I actually got married before we had our wedding. Oh, you did? Yeah, because I'm Canadian.

Oh, okay, yes. Yeah, and it was, you know, it just made sense. A lot of people do that, actually. Yeah, exactly. And actually, a lot of people get married before their wedding, period, because you just very rarely do people get married at the ceremony of their wedding. It could be the day before, it could be a month before. Especially if you go out of the country.

Yeah, exactly. So, I don't know, I thought long and hard about whether or not I needed a wedding. Right, because you had the... Yeah, and I know that's not only what you're asking. You're asking marriage versus wedding. No, no, because I understand that side of it too because I'm like, I could easily just go to, like, the court house and get married and have the green card because I'm Canadian too. Yeah. You know, that would be...

And we probably will do that eventually before we actually get me. married but yeah actually our lawyer for what it's worth or immigration lawyer specifically said you that it's risky to put all the time money and effort into a wedding if you're Canadian to have some like little tiny thing kind of keep it from going through and then you you know invest in this wedding that you know so for what it's worth like city hall actually does make sense for Canadians see that's good to know beforehand but no I understand but like I've never pictured myself to have this big crazy wedding yeah I don't care about the like I don't care about the like I don't like I care about the dress, but I don't care about, like, I'm not like, I've dreamt about

this moment. I'm the exact same. I don't care what people are eating. The only only thing I knew I wanted was that my, my dress is backless. That's all I'm like, I don't know the trend, I didn't know the material, like, I didn't know anything. I'm the same way, but, but so it's like, that's, but that's what got me thinking about the deeper meaning of like, what is marriage?

Yeah. I'm like, I haven't pictured myself being that bride or like, yeah. So what does it mean to me? And I'm just curious what it means to you. I don't know if I really have a. good answer to that I just feel like I have to even have an answer such confidence in him and in us that to call him my boyfriend doesn't give it justice totally get that totally and I don't know who I'm proving that to like it's kind of bullshit it doesn't have to be proving to anyone but that's just

could be how my dad same thing he had been with Kathy and my stepmom now for so long and it just didn't feel right for them they knew they're gonna be together yeah and they were like we're mature And we're like, you know, we're there. We know what we're doing. Yeah, this is not a rash decision. Right. And boyfriend and girlfriend does seem, you know, like it's not enough. Yes.

For your confidence. Yes. In the relationship. Exactly. I get that. Yeah. So that's a good enough answer for me. Yeah.

I mean, I feel like in this day and age, it doesn't necessarily matter. No. Yeah. But I like the thought of calling Sean my husband. Yeah. Can I just say it's because it's been like two, two and a half months. Like, it still feels weird. Oh, of course.

Oh, yeah. My husband. Fiancee still feels weird for me and it's been two years. Yeah. Like I'm like, what? Yeah. I feel old. I'm like, my husband.

I'm an old married lady. Husband and that's, fiancee is like fun and flirty. Yes. Husband's like old and. Yeah. I'm a, I'm a wife. Yeah, I'm a woman. Yeah.

Yes, you are. No, I totally get that. Oh, I like that. Okay. Well, I told my joke. We got, we hit everything. Yes. We did it.

Great podcast. I even feel like they might keep a lot of this Usually it's like an hour max But I'm like looking over it says 80 minutes And I'm like What would they cut? This is perfect They can't and you know what I will take this makes me so happy

Some people will write me and be like I don't want your podcast to end Like could you make it a little bit longer Which is just like the most flattering thing in the world Can I just say Yes Your fans Aren't they just the most loyal

sweet fun outgoing Oh my God I refuse to use the word fan I know. Oh, okay. So as I said the word fans, I was kind of like, ah, she's probably not good, but like, because I feel the same way, but like, you have, okay, I just follow your, your, that sounds even, that sounds culty. Little monsters, I don't know, the people who. Viner's. Viner's, the people to whom you speak. Yes. It's just so, what a community.

When I was at Caroline's on Broadway, I, like, I was with Jasmine, um, and we were just like, this is incredible. It was just such a good feeling and no one was there to hate. No. People were there because they felt like they knew you, they related to you. It was so lovely. That's why I started the off of my Instagram page is because I really felt like there was such a tight community to have there. Yeah. And I was like, like, that's another Instagram page that I have that actually really love and I don't really try that hard. And I just know it's all these supportive women.

Yeah. And men. There's men too. Yeah. But it's like such a supportive space that I just love being a part of. And I can't believe I've brought people together in that way. And I'm like, I want to create. this Instagram page where, like, women go there to, like, compliment each other and, like, come up with ideas and tell me what they love about the podcast.

Yeah, but they're not goody two shoes necessarily. No. Yeah, they can roll with it. They can hang. Yeah, they can, exactly. Viner's can hang. Yes. And I just love it.

I feel like I'm, like, where I'm supposed to be in, in that position. Okay, I have so many, like, nice things I want to say to you. I don't even know this is on the air anymore. But, like, you are killing it. Thank you. You were killing it while still being you. Yeah. While still kind of, like, touching on the.

bachelor world but you're not like in the bachelor world and you're on fucking Broadway and your podcast is killing it it's just I'm very like happy for you and I believe that that all stems from just being true to yourself and being a good person like you said this you said this on the live thing where you're like if you go on a show and you're just your weird self yeah yeah you know you don't censor who you are like you'll attract people exactly who are like mine same same thing with like yeah off the vine Whether it's a business or a relationship or a friendship or anything that you have, I feel like if you are just genuinely who you are, you will attract the right people. Yes.

And that's the same thing with this podcast. Like I just feel like I've attracted the perfect crowd. I'm like, I love you guys. You guys get me. You can relate to me. You share stories with me. You confess to me now. Like it's just such a, it is.

It's a community. Yeah. Such a feel good one too. Well, I'm going to end it there. On that note. On that note, if you have an. already. Subscribe to it. No, I'm actually not kidding. You too can be a viner. Yeah, you two can be a viner with a click of a button. All right, guys, grab a pen and paper. I don't even know who grabs a pen and paper anymore. Grab your phone, pull out your notes section and write down all the sponsors that I've given you through this podcast to remember the deals. Figs, you can get 20% off your order, wear figs.com slash vine with promo code vine. Bright sellers, 50% off your first box. Brightsellers.com slash off the vine. RX bars, 25% off your first order, rxbar.com slash vine with the code vine at the checkout.

Ava, you can get $20 off your order, AvaWomen.com, promo code, vine, and Amazon. Amazon.com slash shop slash Caitlin Bristow. Thank you. Thank you for being here. Oh, my God. Thank you. Thank you for being part of this podcast for drinking a little bit of wine before an audition. Yes. Maybe it will help. Maybe it's like a little good luck charm. I think it's going to loosen me up.

There you go. Be more fearless. There you go. Less in my head. Let me know how it goes. And if you guys don't want to miss an episode, go to podcast1.com, subscribe on Apple Podcasts, and download the Podcast One app. I'm Caitlin Bristow, and I'll see you next to say. Thanks for listening to Osprevine with Caitlin Bristow.

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