Off The Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe - Tamera Mowry-Housley: The Magic of Christmas & Sister(sister)hood

Episode Date: November 29, 2022

Hope you're ready to get nostalgic today! And if not, "go home, Roger," because just hearing her voice will bring you right back to the ‘90s. Tamera Mowry-Housley is on the pod to tell us all about her recently-released memoir and everything she’s been up to since one of our fave shows was on air. We first got to know the iconic twins, Tia and Tamera, on the hit sitcom Sister, Sister and since then, Tamera has continued to skyrocket in the entertainment world, from her time on The Real to starring in Hallmark movies to hosting a new show on Amazon involving lots of cookies. She’s opening up about what it was like to enter such a competitive industry at a young age, how she finally faced the insecurities from it, and we get to hear her favorite inspirational Tamera-isms (Kaitlyn’s got some Kaitlyn-isms of her own). Then, KB & Tamera rank their favorite Christmas movies and give their take on the Die Hard debate. Last but definitely not least, Tamera teases “sex goals” we can expect to read about in her new book and gives a classic confession from filming live on the set of Sister, Sister. Thank you to our sponsors! Check out these deals for the Vinos: ADVOCARE - Get 15% off your first order at AdvoCare.com/otv (otv all lowercase)! JENNI KAYNE - Find your forever pieces at jennikayne.com and get 15% off your first order when you use code VINE at checkout. MRS. FIELDS - Get 25% off everything site-wide when you go to mrsfields.com/VINE . EHARMONY - Download the eharmony app and start free today. PROGRESSIVE - Quote at Progressive.com to join the over 27 million drivers who trust Progressive. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Okay, let's talk about the original enemies to lovers story. Before all of our reality TV couples, before the rom-coms, we binge, there was Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy in pride and prejudice. And Audible has just dropped a brand new original that will have you completely hooked, I am. It's not just any audiobook. This is a full cast performance. So Marisa Abella, you might know her from industry, brings Elizabeth Bennett to life.

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So whether it's your first time experiencing pride and prejudice or you've read it a million times, you're going to fall absolutely in love all over again. So go listen to Pride and Prejudice now at audible.ca slash Jane Austen. This episode of Off the Vine is brought to you by Advocare. Quick question for the vinoes out there, does having extra energy during the holiday season seem impossible? I've been there, but not anymore. My go-to for extra energy this time of year is Spark from Advocare. You can find your flavor of Spark and discover more. products for all your health and wellness solutions. Get 15% off your first order at Advocare.com

slash OTV today. Jenny Kane, find your forever pieces at jennie cane.com and get 15% off your first order when you use code Vine at checkout. Mrs. Fields get 25% off everything sitewide when you go to Mrs. Fields.com slash Vine. EHarmony, download the EHarmony app and start free today. And Progressive. Quote at progressive.com to join the over 27 million drivers who Trust Progressive. Welcome to Off the Vine with Caitlin Bristow. Get ready to laugh, connect, and feel empowered with Caitlin and her guests as they sip wine, lots of wine, and get candid.

They say vulnerability creates connection. So save the highlight reel for Instagram because when we're among Vino's, there's no filter. It's time to unwind. Here's your host, Caitlin Bristow. Welcome to Off the Vine. I'm your host, Caitlin Bristow. Do I have to keep saying that or do you know how I am by now?

I have Tamara Mowry Housley here with me today, and I am feeling super nostalgic. You probably know her from a little show back in the day called Sister, Sister. And I can't say that seriously without going, sister, sister. Oh, that was pitchy dog. She's a fellow wine lover and a Hallmark Christmas movie lover. In fact, she stars in one. that we're going to talk about. We talk about life, wine, cookies, you know, all the important things. And I get the best confession from her time filming. Sister, sister. Oh, that's a little

better. Uh, this is a shorty, but a goody. Okay, Vino's, enjoy. Hi, how are you? Hi, Caitlin. How are you? I'm good. Do you look beautiful? Oh, thank you. I did not wake up like this. Well, I feel that I do. did wake up like this so we are on very different pages right now but you had a you had like a massive press run today didn't you yes I did yes yes I'm not done yet you're not well I mean you you have to put up with me for a little while but uh thank you so much for joining I know those days can be so exhausting but exciting at the same time because it obviously means you have stuff going on and and things are going well so do you like that press conferences can now and like doing these media

runs can now be over Zoom or do you prefer them in person? Um, you know, I think it depends on what I'm doing talk shows. I love coming from comedy and doing sitcom. There's just something about having a live audience. Yes. Doing a talk show without an audience, I will say was very, very interesting. Yes. During the pandemic. But I do like, you know, being in the comfort of your, your space. I get that. I'm like, I'm all about that Zoom life. because, like, I'm not even wearing pants right now. And then if I go to L.A. and I can do it in person.

Like, it's awesome being around people and, like, having that energy. I know you've said before that it's actually really hard to do talk shows. Like, it's really draining and heavy and, you know, doing that every single day. But I can't even imagine because sometimes you get the support of the audience or at least their energy or the claps or the whatever, where when you're just like, it makes, I'm sure it created just like more tension or things felt more tense without an audience. Yes, especially when you were supposed to talk about intense, you know, topics. Right.

You can truly feel the intensity of that. But also having the other girls on the show just in your space because we were very supportive of each other. And after, you know, being with each other for, I want to say, almost a decade. Yeah. Yeah. Like we can just vibe. We would know if, you know, Adrienne was having, you know, a day. She was traveling all over.

She was a little tired. We can just sense it without having to say a word. And the other girls or I, we would just naturally pick it up. And vice versa. I can remember there was one season. I was nursing my daughter and, you know, going to work. I don't remember an entire season because I didn't get any sleep. I mean, sleep deprivation is real.

Real. Yeah. It is. It is. But how nice that you had that group, like a group of women that were there to support you? 100%. The one thing that The Real did teach me is, you know, well, I always knew girl code, you know, just by being, having a twin and going to high school. But there's something different being around women who are naturally girl cheerleaders.

They're not, they're four girls. They're not like, looking down on you. If anything, they always want to pump you up. And that was so refreshing, encouraging and beautiful to be around. And I feel as a result of that, all of us are really close friends. We're still in each other's lives. And I think we've grown. You know, I've definitely grown as a woman.

Oh, for sure. I mean, I'm not a man hater by any means love men, but men could never. They could never. It's just there's something. No, they don't. There's something so magical about like a group of supportive women when they come together and how they can like feed off each other, but also feel if the other person is off and carry the weight a little bit and just have empathy and compassion. It's really beautiful.

And you probably have that having a twin sister as well. Like, I always say, like, I would love to have twins. I know that's, like, when you're pregnant with twins, you're probably like, oh, my gosh, this is a lot. But I feel like every, there's so many sets of twins that I know are, there's something, again, I'm using the word magical again, but that's how I see it. Like, the bond between two sisters or brothers or brother and sister, whatever it is, is like, there's nothing else like it in the world. And it's so, it's such a cool bond. And obviously, you got to do comedy and a sitcom with your twin sister. growing up. That must have been magical. Magical. What's worth me? I'm going to drink every time I say

the word magical. Hey, I love it. That's the motto for this podcast. It's magical. My outfit is kind of magical too. I'm in like the Christmas spirit. So there you go. It really is. But no, it really is special because the thing about being a twin and we feel like it's definitely this special club when you meet other twins they they understand that you know bond and i always say it could be a blessing it's never a curse it could be a blessing and and somewhat challenge a challenge like that um at the same time because they're always with you so no matter what she's feeling um she's going through i feel it too wow yeah so we're we're connected that way And the positive is, is that we can never lie to each other.

And my sister has spoken about this before, you know, she can say, hey, I'm doing really good right now. I'm like, no, you're not. Liar. You can't, yeah, you can't fool me. And vice versa. And also, no matter what goes on, like, we can have our disagreements. We can have our days where we're just like, uh, don't talk to me. There's always going to be that like, I mean,

mad love. I mean, we have Jumel on our wrist, which basically means twins, tattoo is twins in French tattooed on our wrist. Like, my brother always picks on us. He's like, you had to get a tattoo to remind yourself, you guys are twins. I'm like, no, Todd,

you don't get it. Todd. You're not one of us. Yes. It means, you know, we're always with each other, you know, no matter what. And we love each other. no matter what and I will fight for that girl and vice versa oh yeah that's I mean family is one thing and blood is one thing and then twins is a whole other level I feel like yeah yeah you've just got

each other's back from from not even day one day zero in the womb yeah I love that yeah I'm not gonna like that's just even like hearing your voice is so nostalgic for me because I was such a huge fan of sister sister my sister actually sent me a message but Before I even knew we were doing this podcast, being like, did you know this is on Netflix? And I was like, yes. And we used to watch it all the time. And we used to always be like, go home, Roger. And like, we would do that all the time.

I loved, loved that show. And the fact that it's like back on our TVs is just amazing. And do you keep up with anyone else from the cast, obviously, besides your sister? Like, I was like, I'm going to do some research with Roger. That guy's crushing it on Instagram. He's got like over 4 million followers. I'm like, get it, Roger. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. And he's married to a beautiful woman. They have a beautiful daughter, but we do keep you know, contact. That's awesome. We even have our little nicknames. I don't know why, but I always called him Puponini. And, uh, nicknames, you never have to, you never have to know why. When they're nicknames, you don't have to, I have the weirdest nicknames for everybody. My dogs, my fiancee, like, it's just the weirdest stuff comes out of my mouth. So you don't have to explain it. Okay. So it's Poo-Ponini and still to this day, he lets me call him that. But yes, Tim Reed, I still speak to, I talk to Jack Kay. Obviously, my sister, Marcus Houston, that show will always be, you know, a part of me.

I know there are some people who like to kind of like get rid of the past. I'm like, no, you will always be, you know, a part of me. a part of my life. I am grateful for that show because that show is what catapulted me, you know, in, in this business, in this business, it could be very, very challenging, especially as a child actress. Oh, yeah. Oh, my gosh.

I know, I'm like, you're not like the Olson twins. They were like, see you never, but you can, you can appreciate the start. But that's the thing. It did catapult, like, everything for you. And obviously, that came with all of your hard work and the talent as well. But that's like the foundation of where you started from. Absolutely. And I'm so grateful for that.

And, you know, I wrote a memoir and I was, you know, talking about how hard it was even to break in, you know, to the industry. I started in Texas with pageants. You know, I was like a big fish in a small pond there. And then moved to California. Yeah. And saw like thousands of people who looked like me, you know, and who wanted. wanted the same thing. And at 11 years old, that was very, very challenging. It was the first time I experienced true rejection. Like I always thought you try hard, you study, you know. You'll get what you

want. Yeah. But in Hollywood, it's a different, it's a different story. You know, you just have to keep trying, keep honing your craft, believing in yourself and not letting you know the rejection define you as a human being and you slowly but surely realize oh wait wait wait wait i book my first job well that's not only do you get rejected but then you build resilience and then you're a mom a wife an author like talk show hosts like all these things you're like okay that really it really builds strength and character but i can only imagine how hard it is to be going through the world of Hollywood at such a fragile age and time in your life where you're trying to like, well, I figured out who I was like in my late 20s. So I feel like it forces you to grow up fast, but it also forces

you a lot of life lessons and important things to shape you into who you are. So how do you think being in that kind of like public eye and Hollywood lifestyle shaped you as a person when you're that young? I was forced to grow up faster. But I got to give it to my parents for, you know, making sure we still stayed young at heart. Oh, that's nice. Yeah. We were kind of sheltered from, you know, certain things. Like my mom made sure that we didn't stay at Hollywood parties, you know, too long.

She made sure that we had chores at home. So we knew, you know, okay, the world may know who you are, but you still have responsibilities at home. But the one thing that growing up in the industry did was I, learned about my true insecurities at an early, early age. And it wasn't until I want to say in my late 30s that I actually was able to recognize where that, where I don't want to say trauma, but where the insecurities were born. My therapist says there's, there's all kinds of levels of trauma. you obviously you're not going to say like someone that was like abused or went through something

else that's like that's trauma you don't want to discredit what they've been through but there's little T trauma and there's big T trauma so you had little T trauma yes oh thank you I learned something there that's awesome but yeah and I didn't realize it you know until later because you know and I spoke of this before where I was saying I'm in an industry where they literally tell you what to do how you're supposed to say something, you know, that's a director. We have a director telling us where to go, what to say.

If it was good, if it was bad, you have casting directors always constantly giving you feedback, saying yes, no, she didn't get this part. I literally had someone say, oh, she's not pretty enough. She's just, oh, she should just be a girl next door, you know, and hearing that for years,

you have to, you know, constantly fight the negative voices, you know, in your head. Well, you already have those in your head. So then to have someone like confirming them to you where you're like, so I am, my feelings are valid is what you're saying. Yes. And that's the thing. I made agreement with these words and with these statements.

And I, I kind of sheltered them. I hid them down. I pushed them down. And it wasn't until my late 30s where I was like, okay, enough. enough. Like, this is, where the hell is this coming from? Like, I'm just kidding older. Like, we can't live like this, Tamara. No, you have one life that we know of to like, you know, really get to know who you are. Okay, so I know that holiday shopping can be a little bit stressful sometimes, but you're welcome because I've got some recommendations for you that's just going to make you

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I'm really into that white grape peach flavor right now. now, so good. You can find your flavor of spark and discover more products for all of your health and wellness solutions at avocare.com slash OTV. Get 15% off your first order at advocare.com slash OTV today. And PS, make sure that OTV is in all lowercase when you head to their website. I'm on like this huge self-love journey right now. Well, I've been on it for years and years, but I'm like digging in right now and I'm learning so much. But I feel like writing a memoir, writing a book, that can be, you know, therapeutic or doing things. Like a lot of stuff that you're doing, even though it's like you're a talented person at it and you have the skill set and the following and the platform.

You also like, well, yeah, you really do. And you also have the experience to, you know, share your experience and to help others. And I feel like writing a memoir or writing a book was probably like therapeutic. in a way. It was very therapeutic. And, you know, I also learned some things while I was writing it, things that I thought I had gotten over, but I didn't. It was, you know, some of those things, little teas again, that I kind of like just put underneath the rug and just moved on from it. And then once I was talking about it, it brought up these feelings of, oh, gosh. Okay. We have to, we have to fix this. We have to fix, you know, we have fixed that. And I talk about it. You know, my dating life, getting into the business. And the biggest one was dealing with criticism doing a talk show. You know, I was very used to critics, again, in the industry, criticizing your movie, criticizing your television show.

constructively you know sometimes sometimes not but I wasn't used to people criticizing my character because that is one thing that I take very seriously no one is a perfect human being I am not I am by all means not perfect but I believe in you know self-help I believe in you know trying and inspiring to be a better person daily and learning from our mistake and I wasn't used to people who didn't even know me literally bash my character

and I genuinely love people, Caitlin. Like that is it. I love communicating. I love people. I love learning about people. So to hear these people that if I met them in real life, I would actually talk to

and be like, hey, how's your day? Just bashing my character, not even knowing who I am, And on the daily, it was rough. So that was one of the things that when I was writing the book was very therapeutic for me. And I was like, okay, this is, we can't, we have to be our number one encourager. We can't let people define who we are. You define who you are.

And that was one of the tamarisms that I put in, in my book. You should sit down for this. I'm very proud of it. You should be. But thank you. And more than anything is I hope people can relate to it, you know. Oh, they absolutely will. I mean, even if you're not in the public eye, you can relate to, like, people having

insecurities, hurting your feelings, not being able to, like, see things that have actually affected your life and who can't relate to wine and cookies and, you know, you've got all the good stuff. You touch on all of my favorite things, life, cookies and wine. Yes, yes. But that's, it's so, yeah, like you were saying, it's people are criticizing your character. Now, you're, you're used to playing a character on TV. But when you actually are just being yourself, people from the outside still believe they can talk to you as if you're a character on a TV show and not a real human being. And that's hard.

That's hard. And also, Caitlin, I feel that, you know, yes, we're in the public side. You know, people, people know us. there are some individuals that feel that while you put your life out there, you're on television, this comes with the territory. You signed up for this. You signed up for this. That is what I started hearing.

But I would have to disagree with that. I think we need to realize that we are human. This is a career choice that, that, you know, we have, you know, you know, chosen, but that doesn't give anyone the green light to just be okay with talking, you know, down or, you know, bad at people. Constructive criticism, girl, I am all for it. Same. Same. Right. Yes. But beating a person up, putting them down, there's a, it's social media bullying. And it, when I was on a talk show, it was at an all-time high. Yeah. And. And, And that doesn't, it's not okay.

It's not okay. Especially when it's especially, I mean, no, it's never okay. But when you're getting it every single day, when you're just being who you, you're authentically trying to live your life and then being, you know, shit on for it by people. And, and you're like, I'm just speaking my truth. I'm just trying to be a good person. I'm not doing anything wrong. You know, yeah, it's, you don't sign up for all the bullying and all the hate that comes

your way. You sign up to, you know, share your talent. and your skill set and your story and your everything that, you know, your path has taken you on in your life to get there. And it's been a lot of hard work too. And I love the Tamarisms because yours are like so like insightful and encouraging. And mine are like, people are like, what should you? I write on here.

And I'm like, go hard or go home. But don't go home hard. Like mine are like not good. But I know what you meant. but like what other tamarisms are some of your favorites oh be your number one encourager what that means is okay it's very important to have a support group right yes it's so important and i feel like it's needed but your support group is telling you all these positive things and you don't believe it yourself. Honestly, it's just noise. Yeah. Right. Yep. You have to be ultimately,

they can say, you're amazing, you're gorgeous, you're kind, you're talented. They can say it until they're like, you know, tired, exhausted. But if you don't believe it yourself, there's going to be no progress. You have to look at yourself in the mirror. you have to show up for yourself you have to be ultimately what's going to help you move forward make that next move you know make that next step you have to believe it yourself and i love that one because you know in this business again not everyone's going to share your vision yeah yeah not everyone is going to like you but what's important is is you have to learn to love yourself flaws and all and uh like yourself

Yeah. I talk about that a lot on my podcast actually is the negative self-talk that we can all do and how I'm trying to think of how long now I've been doing it. But I've and I've said it on the podcast. Just for years and years, I've really tried to like turn the beat around where I actually just stop myself if I'm having negative self-talk. And I start, I'll look in the mirror and I'll like tap my own heart and I'll say all the things in myself. I don't know what she likes to call herself. She's like a health and wellness coach and she does a lot of self-love and all these things. She made me write down a hundred things that I loved about myself. And I found that so impossible, but once I did it, I was like, okay, so then anytime I had negative self-talk, I would go look at my hundred things that I would love about myself. And then I would turn to that instead. And I'd be like, nope, this is awesome and I'm good at this and I love this and I love. And it really did change, like, shift something in my brain to, to like turn my mindset around to actually think about things I love about myself when I'm thinking about things that I don't love. I am writing this down. Yes. I gave you a new Tamera as a lot. See, my Caitlinisms aren't all stupid. No. And you know what? I feel like, like Tamaraisms or your isms. It's like wine.

They're subjective. They have to be true and authentic to who you are. So, Caitlin, they're not stupid. They're just your personality. Like, I know your personality just by you telling me some of your isms. So, and as you can see, they are helpful. I am going to do this because. I'm a psych major, so I know the importance of replacing a negative thought with a positive

if you have obsessive, if you have obsessive thoughts or obsessive pattern. So this is good because you will have them on hand to replace it with a positive. I love that. A hundred things. Wow. Yes. Oh, my gosh. Thank you.

I love that. Oh, that made my whole day that you wrote that down and you're a psych major. I'm like, yes. And honestly, I think we became friends because you live in freaking Napa. I have a wine label. You love wine. I love wine. You own a coffee shop. These are literally two of the best beverages on the planet. You've just like, you've got it going on. You're in a holiday movie, which we have to talk about a Hallmark Christmas movie, which again, I am one of those. I'm a sucker for a Hallmark. Christmas movie. I'm so excited. Oh, yay. I have to say this season, the lineup of films and the movies that have been made, they are on another level. Really? It is. Oh, yes. Like, Hallmark did not come to play this year. They have a lot more comedy, a lot more depth. And the actors are just phenomenal. So I feel very grateful to be a part, you know, of this family. But I have a film coming out November 18th, 8 p.m. on the Hallmark Channel. So it's the Hallmark Channel. They have different channels. This is the Hallmark Channel. And this one is really special to me because, one, I get to play a mom. I love playing a mom. I just, I know there are some actors who are like, oh my God,

I can't believe I'm playing a mom. No, I love it. I love it. I have an amazing cast. Izzy Birch, she plays my daughter, Grace, fantastic. Ronnie Rogue Jr., who has done the Hallmark film, but he's actually in the new Star Trek series. Absolutely phenomenal. But this movie, if I could describe it in a couple of a few words, sweet, just sweet, adorable and emotional.

Oh, I love that. that it is about a mom who created this well she didn't create the story the story was kind of passed on down through her father uh the christmas prince and this christmas prince is a guy who actually spread joy and uh grant's wishes for santa claus the reindeer's and mrs claus but most importantly if he chooses um a boy or a girl to become the king or queen um um a of the Christmas season and he will grant whatever wish, you know, they want. And so basically, the story inspires, you know, children to be good, you know, all year, all year rounds. Yes.

But the thing is, is my daughter ends up coming to work and I have a grinch of a boss and I actually want to quit my job. She sees him and he has the little birthmark that I say in the story he got because he was kissed by a reindeer. but he actually has the birthmark on his wrist. And she's like, oh, my gosh, ma'am, that is a Christmas prince. Right as I am saying, I quit. I don't like working for you for crazy. Oh, no. And I'm like, no, no, no, that's not the Christmas prince.

And she is just so happy. And, you know, my husband in the film passed away. So Christmas, around Christmas time. And so Christmas is very, very, hectic and stressful for me, but I want to make my daughter happy. So I'm like, oh, dang, I've got to go along with this story now. I am stuck at work. Oh, that's cute.

Yeah, it's really cute. And it's called inventing the Christmas Prince, right? Yes. All right. So I think it's safe to say that this holiday season, we want to give each person we care about the gift that will bring them joy. Am I right? Well, what the heck brings you more joy than fresh from the oven, melt in your mouth,

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Are you a freak for Christmas like I am? Am I? I do Hallmark films. Yeah, I was going to say, I hope, like, I mean, you'd have to be. But I want to know, you know, people say, what is the one, what is the movie that everybody debates if it's a Christmas movie or not? Die hard. You know, that is actually. Yes.

I'll tell you why. Christmas films are supposed to bring you joy. And you're supposed to feel all warm and fuzzy. When I'm watching that, I'm like, damn. Oh. Oh, God. Oh, Jesus. Oh, there goes.

Come on. Just kill the man. I don't feel jolly. Okay. So then I then your answer is no, it's not a Christmas movie. No. I'm with you. Okay, good. It's just a movie that happens to happen during Christmas. That doesn't make it a joyful Christmas movie. You don't just watch it at Christmas time. Okay. What's your top three Christmas films of all time? Okay. Home alone. I would have to say two. I love to. I love to. Home alone in New York. Yeah. Yeah. Christmas vacation.

Yes. And then, oh, man, I love Tim Allen's Santa Claus. I do too. Yes. I love, love, love, love, love. I love that. But there's so many. That's hard.

I know. But that's a good top three. That's aligned with mine. We're aligned. I'm not just saying that because I'm trying to force a friendship on you. But I really. I really am. Also, you have a new Amazon show coming out as well on December 13th,

Dr. Seuss baking challenge. I would like to know what you bake on a Dr. Seuss baking challenge. I'm like thinking about cooking challenge like green eggs and ham. But then I'm like, what are you baking? Are you hosting? Are you tasting? What are you doing? I am hosting, tasting and judging.

All of the things. Oh, my gosh. All the things. Clarice Lamb is a judge. Jonathan Russell is a judge. What makes this show different is that. you have a cake artist and pastry chef. So one person baked, the other decorate.

And the thing is, is you have to make things look like they have come out of the world and book of Dr. Seuss. Right. And the thing about Dr. Seuss, it's very colorful. It's distinctive. It's very popular. So people know. Oh, people know. who, you know, the cat and the hat, you know, looks like.

But they have certain hands, certain eyes. And their illustration always looks like it's moving. So you have to add that within your, you know, your creations. They are very talented. I can do one little thing that these, you know, chefs have done. But it's magical. I know you kept saying magical. Yes.

Thank you for bringing it back. Yes. It's colorful And it's funny They let me do like these comical bits Throughout the show that I've never done before And it's just a good time And it's a party for your

It's a party for your eyes And your tape but unfortunately you guys don't get Well we'll be inspired by what everybody makes I wish I could talk to you longer Because my other Caitlinism was If Plan A doesn't work out I was going to make a sex tape and I was trying to do research.

And I was like, I've got to talk to her about her sex expectations because you have a section of your book that talks about sex goals and how to keep your marriage strong. But we'll just save that for people need to get the book to read all about it. Because all I want to know is a quick example of what is a sex goal, like a little quick example.

Okay, a sex goal is something that keeps your marriage or your relationship feisty, that it is okay to have them. It's okay to vote. localize your wants, your needs sexually. Yes. And, you know, it doesn't mean, because I feel sometimes when women get, you know, married, especially after a long time, they're like, oh, well, I guess it's not important and it's right now.

No. If that's something that you love, I think intimacy is very important in a relationship. So one would be, for me, I've always wanted to, well, you have to read the but that was good that right i already wanted to read the book but that right there i'm like okay i will but i mean you just have so much going on every everything that you did i was reading and it was so funny because that's what was coming up of what your sex tape would be called because they're looking for clickbait and i was clicking um but you've done so many things i want to know two last things what is on your bucket list that you want to do that you haven't done

And two, after that, you've got to tell me an embarrassing story, a confession, if you will, before we leave. So on my bucket list, I love to travel. I want to go to France, rent out an Airbnb, and stay there for about a month and truly immerse myself within the culture, whether that's taking a, you know, baking class. whether that's taking French class there. But I've always wanted to own a flower shop in Paris. I don't. I don't know why. Well, I mean, you can.

You can do anything clearly and you own coffee shops and wineries and you're a talented comedian and actors and all these things. Why not just go open a flower shop in France? Stop in Paris, right? The most, I have a couple of embarrassing stories in my life. With the same topic, it's, oh, God, it's still. gross. I'm sorry. No, if you knew who you were talking to, you'd be like, oh, I have no shame in this confession.

Okay. All right. Well, I was doing a show called Sister's Sister. And I was shooting a scene. I was 16. And I did not know I had come on my minstrel. and as we were shooting in front of a live studio audience, Aunt Flo decides to show up. Oh, you poor thing. I know on a toy chest that we had in our room, so you look at our old episodes, you'll see it. I stand up.

Literally, we've just shot a scene. There is, there's Antslo. Oh, no. And luckily, the audience didn't notice, but guess who noticed? Roger. The cameraman. No. Oh, Roger.

He wasn't in that scene. But the cameraman, because they can see. They were there. Were they kind about it? So kind. Oh, good. They have, you know, kids. They were older.

So I don't know if they had a daughter or anything, but they were just so sweet. So, you know, like, you know, because I was like, oh, my God. And they can hear, you know, they can have their headphones. They can hear everything. And they were just like. it's okay don't wait go handle it you know

so I went to wardrobe but I was so because I was 16 and I got my menstrual later in life did your sister I was going to say

did your sister get it like two seconds after you did and you're like hey that was your warning you know what no it was so funny

we never I don't think I don't think we were like hey you're in your period yeah I am I don't I don't remember it but probably just were and your bodies knew it yeah that's what happens you poor thing that like that's not gross at all that just makes me want to go back and hug that little girl like you poor thing

so now guess what still to this day i have tampons maxi pads everywhere in my car in my purse in in my back yeah well you know what i'm a 37 year old woman who still can't figure it out and all of a sudden it'll be like a full moon and i'll get my period like three weeks early and I don't have a tampon on me and I'm like you would think I would learn at this point to just carry one on me and I don't right so that's it is what it is we all have our thing thank you for sharing thank you for getting that off your chest and thank you for taking the time today to podcast with me I'm just so like thrilled and you're just more lovely than I ever could have expected and I'm so excited for everything you have going on thank you thank you so much yes come on any

time and you live in Napa so I'm going to hit you up when I'm there just come to the coffee shop come to the tasting room let them know you're coming and then yeah I think I will for sure because I um I would love to send you some of my wine as well it's probably we we make it out of Napa as well so nice okay yes so we'll we'll do a swap skis and again thank you so much and have a good rest of your media tour today thank you thank you I'm Caleb bristow I'll see you next Tuesday to this week's episode of Off the Vine. Don't forget to rate, review, and follow on your favorite podcast platform.

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