Oh What A Time... - #104 Lost Property (Part 1)

Episode Date: March 30, 2025

This week we’re trawling through history’s lost property bin to examine a bunch of famous things that went missing. We’ve got a load of Academy Awards, Lawrence of Arabia’s lost manuscript and Queen Victoria’s lost statue.Plus - did human happiness significantly degrade once jogging was invented? Although it does seem to have done wonders for a certain namesake in San Quentin prison. If you’ve got anything to add on this or anything else, do email: [e-mail] you fancy a bunch of OWAT content you’ve never heard before, why not treat yourself and become an Oh What A Time: FULL TIMER?Up for grabs is:- two bonus episodes every month!- ad-free listening- episodes a week ahead of everyone else- And much moreSubscriptions are available via AnotherSlice and Wondery +. For all the links head to: ohwhatatime.comYou can also follow us on: X (formerly Twitter) at @ohwhatatimepodAnd Instagram at @ohwhatatimepodAaannnd if you like it, why not drop us a review in your podcast app of choice?Thank you to Dan Evans for the artwork (idrawforfood.co.uk).Chris, Elis and Tom xSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondery Plus subscribers can listen to episodes of Oh What A Time early and ad free. Join Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Holy black bean wrap! What a trio! Holy guacamole! Bye bye, boring as bread sandwiches! Fuck yeah! New flavors, new cravings! Avocado up to wraps and paninis from Booster Juice! Canadian-born blending since 1999. Download the Booster Rewards app and order one today! Hello and welcome to Oh What A Time, the history podcast that asks the question, were we really happier before the advent of marathon running, jogging for pleasure, half marathons, charity

runs, fun runs, et cetera. The reason I'm asking this is that for the Sushi Distance Sports Bar podcast I do with Mike Bubbins and Stef Guerrero. For this week's episode, I've had to watch a documentary about marathon running in San Quentin prison, which is like a category or tier four prison for

murderers in California, in America. It's on iPlayer. It's very, very interesting. Will Barron Is this a rehabilitative thing that they're trying to bring in that they think will help? Dan Malkus Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's a running club. Will Barron Okay. So you can sort of run off the guilt. Dan Malkus Yeah. So they begin training in January and then they run a marathon in the yard in November. Will Barron Wow. Will Barron So the yard is, I just tried to work it out, it was roughly a quarter of a,

it's about a quarter of a mile. So it was like 105 laps or something. Anyway, you know, by the end you feel you really know the characters involved. Look at this person who is the fifth finisher. I've just sent it on the WhatsApp group. This is the photo you sent us. Okay, let's have a look. We'll obviously stick this on the gram so that people can see. This guy finished fifth in the Saint Quentin marathon. What? Eh? It's a guy called Chris Skull. Yeah. There's a man with the name Chris Skull written clearly on screen.

There's someone in San Quentin prison called Chris Skull. Yeah, yeah. He's, you know, he's serving to be daft like a 55 year sentence. Is he? Yeah, yeah. They all are. I don't want to know he's crying. I don't know what he's done.

Why does about 10% of me believe that he's innocent and that our Chris Skull is the one who should be in St. Quentin prison? Maybe West Ham they sort of are. I don't know what St. Quentin prison Chris Skull has done, but it would be bad and he's probably in there, he's got like an 80 year term or something. Wow. St. Quentin is not VAT fraud. No, no, no, no, no, it's got like an 80 year term or something. Wow. San Quentin is not VAT fraud. No, no, no, no, no, no.

It's not white collar stuff. It's not an open prison where you can go, we can walk around town and have a coffee. It's... It's pretty... It's pretty... Where your cellmate can help you with your case because he used to be a lawyer.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's the opposite of that. But in fairness to Chris Skull, my favourite Chris Skull, he did run the San Quentin marathonathon in 3 hours 42 minutes 25 seconds. That's an unbelievable time. It's a very good time. Also he looks like he's just done 10 push-ups. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He's got a cap on backwards like a very light sheen of sweat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He doesn't look like a guy, I mean, when I did the marathon, I had bleeding nipples. You've got to approach this guy and say, listen, do you want to do a podcast? Can you get Zoom? Do you want to work together? I don't know what we could do, but... It's called Inside Outside.

So you cover life when you're trapped inside and what that's like. You talk about the stresses of the real world. Oh yeah, by Chris Skull Productions. Presented by Chris Skull and Chris Skull. Edited by Chris Skull. I have a question on this. As a prison guard, why do you want to be training inmates in the art of running away really quickly? of running away really quickly. Aren't you making your life impossible if there should ever be a jailbreak? If they do run away, they can run away. If you don't catch them within the first

26.2 miles, who knows what happens after 26.2 because they haven't trained for more than that. So it is just a waiting game. Wait for them to blow up. Yeah. At the very start of your intro, you talked about the dawn of running. One thing that always surprises me, I think about it quite a lot, is that jogging was only really invented in the 60s and 70s. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It just blows my mind. What were people doing? Not jogging.

Sorry. Are you saying that before the 1670s there was no pace of movement that was between walking and running? So people had no middle option? One day in the 60s, someone started running. But in terms of recreational running, the idea of coming home from work and going, I'm going to run for two miles now, that wasn't really a thing. And let's find out where we all sit on this, because I find running unbelievably boring. I understand why people are into it, but it's

too monotonous for me. It can be sort of balanced by the idea that I'm running to a thing. So, for example, we'll run somewhere and we'll have a pint in a nice country pub or something like that. OK, that's there's a I have I used to do that. I used to run to the pub occasionally with my friend Sam. You could run along the tow path. You could run and we sometimes. Oh, that sounds quite nice. It was quite nice. But just running for running.

Can't do it. Running, even after a sip of beer, is horrible. A friend of mine, he was very fit and we were going out in Carmarthen and he did all sorts of different exercise and he'd had about eight or nine pints and he was like, I can't believe I've done this. I know I'm having fun, but this is ridiculous. This is terrible behaviour. I mean, I'm putting all my hard work to shame. And then he ran home. But he lived about five miles away. Do you run?

I do run. I cycle more than I run, but I... Yeah, I thought that was your thing. I do one run a week, which I quite enjoy. That bad? Yeah. My wife refuses to go running and jogging because she thinks she runs in a funny way So she feels embarrassed by her style of running and therefore refuses to go out running does other exercise

But that's just is like yeah can't hate the idea of people seeing her running which I gotta get is he for a long Time clean that she couldn't run on tarmac And I had to say to her what she's you can't like the original the original renown Yeah, didn't have a problem with that. I had to say to her, you can't like the original, the original renown. Didn't have a problem with that. I had to say you can. No, I can't. I can run on other surfaces, but not tarmac. Yes, you can. And then she did couch to 5k. And yes, I was proven right. She can. She blew both of her ACLs and got run over by a fire bus.

She's in a wheelchair. Yeah, yeah. It was a tarmac disaster. Yeah, that's a good question. Okay, well, and Chris, let's just go to your final. So Ellis is pre-pro running. I don't get it. Chris, you've got the sort of the final casting vote on it.

I just think it's a great activity to do in the yard while you're serving your 80 years of hard labour. Yeah, yeah. And you've surfing your 80 years of hard labor. And you've got an awful lot of comfort out of that, haven't you, Chris? Because I'm looking at the screen, you know, you are in some Quentin prison for a life sentence. It's been a really interesting, quite moving and poignant documentary. And then I saw that right at the end and I laughed and I laughed and I laughed. I found it. It's also a unique name. Oh, it's clearly not a unique name. It's fairly unique. There's a handful of Chris Skulls in the world. I can't believe one is in

San Quentin. I don't think I've met another Skull. There was Hugh Scully in Antiques Roadshow that for a long time was the closest thing. Yes. To a notable Skull. Yeah. To be fair, if I was in San Quentin prison, I think I'd spend a lot of the time running. Yes. It would be. Most of my time would be in the yard would be spent running away from people. Yes, absolutely.

That's definitely what's happening. I'm down the corridors, praying for the time they lock me away myself for the night. If your wife was in San Quentin prison, she would have to accept that when she is running away from people, people aren't laughing at her. Or if they are, she's got to put up with it because that's life. That is the least of her problems. So there's one thing we can't run away from and that's yet more brilliant history. Am I right, boys?

Yes. What is today's episode on? What are we talking about today? This is a great episode. I can't remember whose idea this was, but we're talking about famous lost property through history. And later in the show, I'll be talking about famous royal relics that were hidden and subsequently rediscovered. I will be talking about famous lost manuscripts. And as someone has written lots of things it terrified me. It just, I actually, when I read the research I felt a genuine chill

in my bones. We're very grateful we live in the era of the cloud at the moment where things are uploaded immediately., I did the first Welsh language stand-up show I did. All of my notes were on my phone, and I lost my phone. And the only thing I cared about was the stand-up show, because I had to record it in a couple of weeks' time, and it was all on the cloud, and I wanted to kiss the cloud.

I don't know whose idea the cloud was. I was going to go to that person and say, thank you, thank you so much. Can I kiss the cloud. I don't know whose idea the cloud was. I want to go to that person and say thank you. Thank you so much. Can I kiss the cloud? On Lost Property, have you ever lost something big and had it returned to you? Will Barron Actually quite sweetly when I was eight, I had a teddy bear. A bit younger than that, you know, eight, no, it was probably about six to be honest. And we went to the Isles of Silly, I left the Isles of Silly. And quite sweetly, the people who run the tiny plane that takes you across to the Isles of Silly, flew it back

and took photos of the teddy bear with the pilot in the front seat of the plane. And so it was returned to me. I had all these photos of my teddy sat with a pilot coming back on the plane. So I do actually have quite a fond memory of something. That's fantastic. It kind of sticks with me as like a really lovely moment of kindness. What a heartwarming story. Genuinely, the world isn't all bad. It's not all Putin.

It's not all war. With words of the wise, if you ever meet Putin, that's not the kind of anecdote that would impress him. It's also not the kind of anecdote that would impress Orban, Trump, basically any strongman sort of leader. They don't like that stuff. You'd get chucked out of Trump's inner circle if you were an advisor of his and you heard about that. What about those little dolls that go inside each other, Ellis?

No, no, no, no, no. Replace the teddy bear with that? Is he on board? no, no, no, no, no. You're done. Replace the teddy bear with that. Is he on board? No, no, no. You, you are, you are out. You're done. I left a large bottle of vodka. And then when it was returned to you, you beat up the guy who returned it to you.

What about you guys? Have you, have you had anything? I've had a very crane-esque experience. I lost this guy. What about you guys? Have you had anything you're talking about? I've had a very crane-esque experience with lost property once. I once got off a train and realised I'd left my bag on the train as the train was pulling away and I went to the station manager and said, I've just left my bag on the train. They stopped the train further down the track and were searching the carriage for the train while I was sat there and the station manager was organising a search of the train, like three stops on.

It was while that search was going on that I realised search of the train, like three stops on. And it was while that search was going on that I realized I did actually leave my bag in the office. I never took it on the train. And so I had to continue with the charade of, oh, it's not on the train, is it? Oh, never mind. Chris. I also think they shouldn't be stopping the train.

I know that sounds a bit spoilsporty, but I think it's slightly on you stopping the train. I know that sounds a bit spoil sporty, but I think it's slightly on you and the train should just continue on its journey normally and if the bag still there at the end is there at the end. The real headline for me is that Chris described that as crane-esque and cramed in absolutely nothing to dispute it. You went yeah? Yeah, that sounds like me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Checks out. I was writing a TV show and the writers, half the writers were in London, half were in Cardiff, and I was doing gigs or something. So we organised a writing day in Bristol, because that was the easiest place for everyone to get to. And I left very early in the morning and I got off at Bristol and through sheer absent-mindedness and tiredness, I got off without...

I, yeah, that was it. I was going on to do gigs. I got off without my case. And in my case, I had all the clothes I needed for the show, et cetera, and my laptop. And it was such a massive thing to lose. I wouldn't say that I felt an eerie calm, but I didn't feel the sort of anger I'd have felt if I'd lost my phone or wallet. It was kind of... It was so much bigger than that.

Okay. It was like... Your brain almost couldn't compute. I couldn't compute how stupid it was. But you'd lost a computer. So I started... Yeah. I remember walking to the writing meeting. It was like in one of those shared office

spaces and the producer said something like, right, everyone get their laptops out, and I had to go, ah. And my laptop was on its way to Plymouth, and I got it back. They, yeah, no one, no one pinched it. Wow. The case was discovered in Plymouth, which is where the train terminated, but then very annoyingly they had to send it back to Bristol. And so I had to go back to Bristol to pick it up, which obviously I was very happy to do.

Chris, are you now like me imagining that this is a really rubbish old laptop now? Yeah. Oh yeah. It's like slightly embarrassing one that you had to wind it up to get it going. My friends of mine refer to it as the cancer machine because it turns on, makes very horrible noises. It's more like having an MRI. A floppy disk in the side. A thief was seen briefly using it before shaking his head and putting it back in the bag.

And then looking down and thinking to himself, oh, I've got two arms in the same sleeve. Oh my god, I'm growing arms. Well, that sounds like a really good subject. And fittingly, you talk about San Quentin and a crime, and we talk about the near theft of your laptop. My subject today is about the Oscars and the various trophies that have gone missing, possibly stolen throughout the years. But before that, let's do a little bit of correspondence because the emails are always great and today is no different. Our email today is from Gareth Butcher. Good name, Gareth Butcher. Sort of like early 90s footballer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely.

I thought you were going to say early 90s soap star. Oh yeah, also take that as well. Absolutely. Absolutely. Hard man and EastEnders. So, correction corner. Always a break from an email. And a lovely opening sentence. Sorry to be that physics teacher. Oh God. But, as any year 12 student knows, Einstein didn't get his Nobel Prize for general relativity, but for the photoelectric effect.

Now, which of you boys covered Einstein? I think it was Chris Skull. Was it me? No. Traveling around Europe? I think it might have been me, actually. Einstein's diaries. Oh God.

Well, I'm afraid of that. You claimed you got the Nobel Prize for general relativity, but it was actually the photoelectric effect. It said, so instead of being recognized for explaining how space and time bends around dense objects, he's written, insert your own joke here. Lovely stuff. He was rewarded for proving the quantum nature of light. Thus, the photoelectric effect is a great gateway idea into the quantum world. But you knew that Ellis, didn't you? Yes. You knew it was a great gateway idea. Do you want to further

expand on that Alice and why is a great gateway idea into the quantum? No, just briefly. Because I'm it's all been said really isn't it? It's all been said. And I do you know what actually think I found it very hard to dumb down. You know, we're a history podcast, we're a science podcast, you know, I've met a lot of our listeners, they're really, they might not know a lot of the vocab and the vernacular and the jargon. So it's probably best I sort of stand well by. And you're not willing to dumb it down.

No, I can't because I'm so bloody clever. Well, that said, Ellis, Gareth does continue by saying, but as Tim Berners-Lee would say, if you Google Einstein, this is in his first paragraph of Wikipedia. I mean, what did he invent the internet for? So a further slam there to say that you can find out the information in the first paragraph of Einstein's write-up. To a Garrison, Nick. He's overstepped the line, I think. He's overstepped the mark. Not sure about that. He's stead correctly on the mark. He stood perfectly on the mark.

He ends by saying, anyway, sorry to be that physics teacher. Usually I'm the happy, fun one, Mr. Butcher. There you go, Ellis. An absolute slam. A double slam. First the information, and then a second point on where you could have got that information. A brief right to reply. No, I mean he's got me banging to rights there. I'm very pleased that the science community listening as well as the history community, that's really, I find that very encouraging.

I wonder if you could have claimed that you said that as a little test to see who'd know you. Yes. That would be a possible excuse. Yes. Trying to fish out the physics teachers. Yeah, yeah. Well done.

We have a winner this week. If you speak to me for long enough, there just will be lots of tests in there. And you don't know I'm testing you, but I know. I know, yeah. So thank you very much, Mr. Butch, for emailing the show. If anyone else wants to get in contact with the show, if, God forbid, we've made another muck up and there's a corrections corner knocking around, that's one of the things you can email about. You can email about old school ideas such as one day time machine, lips to teet, any of this stuff.

And here's how you get in contact with the show. All right, you horrible lot, here's how you can stay in touch with the show. You can email us at hello at earlwatertime.com and you can follow us on Instagram and Twitter at owhatatimepod. Now clear off. Well if you enjoy Oh What A Time, there's even more Oh What A Time to be had with an Oh What A Time subscription. You can become an Oh What A Time full timer. You get two bonus episodes every month.

You get ad-free listening. You get episodes earlier than everybody else. And there's such a huge repository of bonus episodes, isn't there, Tom? There really are. I mean, I've just looked up some earlier. There's episodes on protests, which feature the story of Spartacus, life in the 17th century Royal Navy. There's book reviews taken in life in East Berlin, incredible stories of MI5, the hardships of Stalinist work camps, there's correspondence specials where we answer your

questions and £4.99 a month. And also, to be perfectly honest, it really helps the show. It genuinely makes a real world of difference and allows us to do this and kind of do more episodes and spread the word, all this sort of stuff. It's just really, it's lovely that you support us if you can. and spread the word, all this sort of stuff. It's just really, it's lovely that you support us if you can. And there's one big bonus episode coming through. Very soon, it may even be out as this episode airs. I've got here my copy of Ian Kershaw's

1,000 page Hitler biography, which I've begun marking up for a bonus episode. And I'm gonna say it now, not a great guy, not a great guy. – Ian Kershaw or Hitler? The author of it? – He's so anti-Hitler, I hate this guy! – Chris, have you read the Ian Kershaw biography of Hitler before? – I don't think so. I have read Ian Kershaw's other books. – Yes, I've read it. – It was in two parts. This is actually a combination of his

two previous biographies. So you've read that's a thousand pages and it's going to be a book review. Yeah. I'm reading Postwar, a history of Europe since 1945 by Tony Judt, fantastic book that's a thousand pages. I'll be doing that for a book review. Tom which thousand page history book are you going to read and then do a book review of? Because that's kind of the benchmark. I'm currently, I'm reading a book, I generally am reading a book about life in British prison, which I think is a thousand and one. Oh yeah, a thousand and one. Yeah, it is. And the final extra pages really Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Really tiny writing throughout the book.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you know what's worrying about the incursion of Hitler biography is that it's all taken from an interview in 2006 where he met him in Brazil. That's right, isn't it? That's the bit that's concerning. And there should be making more of that in the press. Yeah. Yeah. It's a long old chat at a thousand pages. Why a thousand pages? That feels too perfect. Has he been told he has to write a thousand pages?

Or has he decided I'm going to write a thousand pages? You don't just happen to finish on a thousand pages. Look how small as well. There's a thousand pages. It's such tiny, tiny... Yeah, that's what my daughter said when she saw Tony, when she saw Poster Wars. She said, God, that type is small. But to be fair, Hitler got through a lot, didn't he? And also, five picture sections. Yeah. Which small type history books are you reading at the moment, Tom? Where are you going to grow up, Tom?

I'm reading a book called The History of Tiny Text, which is the... The smallest writing ever. Very, very good. And that's the great thing about a subscription to O What a Timer is you actually, you don't have to go through the effort of reading these 1000 page books. We'll do it for you. Yeah, and neither does Tom. There you go. That's why I'm on time full-timer. 4.99 a month,

never ever turn a page again, that's ideal. Right, shall we crack on to some history? So what are we talking about today, guys? I'll be talking about lost texts and money scripts. I'll be talking about lost and then subsequently refound royal relics. And I first of all, I'm going to talk to you about the Oscars and the many, many different ways that these iconic trophies have gone missing. Now, let's start with sort of like a broad question.

Are you interested in the Oscars? Is it something you watch? And also broadened that, are you into award ceremonies generally? Is this something you care about at all? I feel very uncomfortable at award ceremonies and I've got no interest in the Oscars apart from sort of it is still a benchmark. So occasionally I'll watch a film and I'll google it and I'll realize that it was you know got nominated for Best Picture in 1977 or something.

And you think, oh, okay. I don't want to watch it. Yes. But I am curious to know who's won. I've got zero interest in the Golden Globes. No. Which feels a little pointless. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know it's a big deal. Yes, yeah. But the Oscars is the one everyone wants.

If any of our listeners have won a Golden Globe, it's not pointless. And if any of our listeners have won an Oscar, I wonder if any of our listeners have won Golden Globes or Oscars. But actually, this is the thing about Golden Globes, is that there's multiple Golden Globe ceremonies, isn't there? Because I've had some friends win Golden Globes, and actually, like, it's really hard not to win one, it seems. Really? Well, I've managed it. Yeah, and I think I will continue to manage it. I've somehow pulled that off. I could see myself continuing to manage that for the rest of my life actually. Sorry I can't believe I'm asking this question Chris but have you won a golden glove?

You've not seen behind me, it's packed, the office is packed, one of them. I'll give you some next time you're over. Door stops, paper weights.. There's a good question for listeners actually. That's a great listener's question. What is the best award you've won? It can be rubbish, obviously. The more rubbish it is, the more likely we are going to read it out. Have you guys won anything in the past in school or anything which is, you know? I was part of the BBC Formula One team that won a BAFTA in 2010 for the coverage of the

Abu Dhabi Grand Prix. That's when you were driving Ferrari, wasn't it? Do you remember that? I did stand up at the National Grower of the Year Award, like 2011. And it was like... How tall were you then? But it was... You shot a puff and it was...

It was stuff like... And a lot of excitement on the turnip table. Who will be victorious? And it was like... And the award for best British distribution of Swedes goes to the Co-op! Yeah! Alison and I, actually, remember we won an award early on. It was the National Student Radio Awards. We'd written a thing.

It was comedy sketch. Best comedy sketch or something like that. I went to the awards. Did you go to the awards? No, I couldn't go for some reason. I went to the awards and it was this big affair in like, what was it? There was something, packed room.

It was a huge old thing and they had Radio 1 presenters presenting. It was a proper thing. And then Dave Lee Travis and Noel Edmonds up there. My last train back to Cardiff. Just trying to date it. It would have been Dave Lee Travis, wouldn't have been Noel Edmonds. Tony Blackburn. I think it was Edith Bowman or something like that.

But my last train back to Cardiff, which is where I was living at the time, Tony Blackburn. I think it was Edith Bowman or something like that. But my last train back to Cardiff, which is where I was living at the time, left before the end of the ceremony. So I had to leave early and then we won. So I wasn't there to go up on stage and pick it up. So we announced it and apparently it was a bit awkward. They kept having to say, is Tom Crane and Alice James here? The winners?

Nobody went up. You were the reason we were able to win it because it was three of us wrote it. You and I and Sean Harris who wrote Man Down with Greg Davies. Yeah. And you were the only one who still had an NNES card because Sean and I had both graduated. If you were writing a comedy sketch only one of the comedy writing team had to be a student and you were doing an MA or something so we snuck in. Another little interesting fact, I spoke to people at the awards ceremony and everyone there had won

a Golden Globe for the movie flick. On a single birth. They were handed them out as you walked in, weren't they? Yeah, I just had a, I just opened the door because we had a delivery from a DPD guy and he had a Golden Globe tucked under his arm actually. Yeah most likely to leave something with your name on it. Or fail to hide it properly behind the bin. The Golden Globe for, oh not in the porch we of stuff, Nick, from porches on this street. Yeah, Wardford, best photograph of an object by my feet, which is normally what happens, where I have to pause awkwardly. Right, so before we crack on, genuinely, if you have won any awards,

do get in contact. The more ridiculous the better. I'd love to hear listeners what's the best thing, or the worst thing you've won in your life. Now, the Oscars, I think we can agree, would be quite impressive. And to start this story of loss and theft, let's take you to the biggest loss of all. This is the year 2000, when an entire, I don't know if you remember this,

an entire shipment of Academy Awards, all 55, due to be handed out at the ceremony, disappeared somewhere between the factory in Chicago, where they were then made by R.S. Owens and Company, and Los Angeles. Do you remember this? This is the year 2000 ceremony. Every trophy went missing. So 52 of the 55 were found dumped in a trash can in LA's Korea town. Yeah. Another was found in Miami in 2003 during a drugs raid by the FBI.

And the other three, so they fished them out the bin. The final two remain lost. There's two from that haul that were never found. But 52 of the 55 were found in a dumpster, and one was found during an FBI drug raid. But what is interesting about this is that even if they had kind of fallen into criminal hands, there would be this no point trying to sell an Oscar.

Do you want to guess why there's no point? Well, it would be so traceable, wouldn't? And that's one of the reasons but not the... Are they not actually made of gold so you couldn't even melt them down? Is there a ban on selling? I can't think... So the reason you should have stolen an Oscar ever come into your hands, there's no point having it, is because the market value is one dollars. This is due to a rule that was introduced in the 1950s, which states that the Academy has first refusal ahead of any possible sale and will only pay that amount. So, if you have one and you try to sell one, you try to sell it on the market for profit, the sale has to go to the Academy if

they want it and they will only pay a dollar. it. Right. So if you want a replacement statue, incidentally, that'll be $75 charged if you lose one. So if you lose your Oscar and you want a replacement it costs 75, that's just a side point. But if you have one and you try to flog it on eBay, should we say, and the Academy get wind of it, they'll owe you to pay you a dollar. And it's legal that they only pay you a dollar for that.

Cause I always find it very sad when ex-footballers who made their money prior to the Premier League financial boom have to do things like sell medals and selling them caps and Scotland caps and Wales caps. I think it's very depressing that you can spend your career in what was then the old first division, play in front of 60 or 70,000 Old Trafford, but because there was no money or far less money in the game then, you end up, I mean, to sell what could be a

very valuable family heirloom. And I suppose, yeah, it's the same sort of thing, isn't it? As a scripted and called comedy writer, I have a different kind of look on my career where I look back on what I could have made in the 80s and 90s. Yes, of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When back ends were a thing. And like one successful thing would mean, oh, I'm now set up for life. That isn't the case in any way now. But it's one of those things like if you were an actor who'd fallen on hard times,

you could sell your Oscar, couldn't you? Yeah. I think the Academy should be ashamed of themselves. That'd be worth a bit of money to an old ageing actor, surely. Well Chris, old ageing actors are fine, basically, because this rule only applies to statues after 1951. So if they're from before 1951, if you're an old codger... Yeah, but they'd all be dead, wouldn't they? You are an old codger. You can sell it.

You're nearly a hundred... you've got to wait till you're a hundred, or you could flog your statue. I mean, you know, Robert De Niro was 81. He wasn't winning Oscars in the 40s, was he? It's a fair point. Well, here's some examples. Steven Spielberg spent $1.4 million on the Oscars once owned by Clark Gable and Bette Davis. However, interestingly, most thieves are not aware of this rule. So this is why Oscars still get stolen and people attempt to sell them then realise they can't and they end up as they have in the trash dumpster in LA. So they assume that Oscars basically have infinite value and so often looking for chances to pilfer them. I'll give you some examples.

The best picture Oscar awarded to Gone with the Wind, great movie, in 1940, which is the first full-colour film to win. That was purchased by, any guesses? Which pop star? You should get this. It's a guy who couldn't stop buying things. Elton John. Think walking around Harrods. Oh, Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson.

Michael Jackson. $1.5 million he paid for that in 1999. When he died 10 years later, the statuette disappeared. Only a few years after that did his lawyers admit to saying they have no idea where it was Wow bloody hell but there's a feeling wow stolen Marlon Brando's two Academy Wars one for on the water oh great yeah and the other for the Godfather which released in 72 ceremony was in 73, are also both missing.

Some suspect theft. There are some other rumors in folklore, one being that Brando used his award as a doorstop. That's what people say, possibly. And then it just got lost because of that. Others say that he gave it away. But in fact, it's the second award, the one for Godfather, which has more of a story. Now, do you remember what was unusual about Brando's acceptance speech for the Godfather? I do. Particularly unusual. I do. He brought a Native American man up onto the set, or a lady to give the speech, wasn't it? Correct. Ding, ding, ding. It wasn't taken by him exactly. Brando boycotted the 73 ceremony in protest at Hollywood's portrayal of Native Americans.

And he asked Sachin Littlefeather, who is an Apache activist and actor, to appear in his place and explain the situation. So they went up and they spoke about the treatment of Native Americans in Hollywood. She, there's some interesting points around it, she refused to handle the award, wouldn't even touch the Oscar, didn't touch it once during the ceremony, leaving the presenter, Roger Moore, to follow behind her, still holding the award in his hand. Which he did, in a completely unflappable way, oh I think you'll find that you've forgotten your Oscar... That's such a good Roger Moore impression. Absolutely. And he then kept it, took it home, left it on display in his own house for a few weeks

before eventually returning it to the Academy. I've got Alex Horne's Chortle Award from about 15 years... You can't go from Marlon Brando's Oscar to Alex Hortz Chortler. It's been in the house for 16 or 17 years. He couldn't attend the Chortler awards and I was there and he won it and someone said, who wants this? And I said, well, I might see Alex, so I'll take it. And I texted Alex, do you want to meet up? So I give you a Chortler award. He said, no, keep it. And you went up and you talked a child?" And he said, no, keep it. It's just in the house.

And you went up and you talked about the treatment of clubcombers, for sure. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was your speech. You were in fashion speech. So the story doesn't end there. As a little while later, a damaged statue from the same 1973 ceremony was sent to the Academy asking for it to be repaired or replaced. That was from Charlie Chaplin. So Charlie

Chaplin had an Academy Award that was damaged. He wanted it replaced. So what did the Academy do? This is a neat little bow at the end of the story. Like to guess what the Academy did when Charlie Chaplin asked for his statue to be... Did they just make him a new one or did they lose it? No, they just used Marlon Brando's rejected Best Actor Oscar. Marlon Brando's rejected Best Actor Oscar. I just sent him that instead. So Charlie Chaplin owns the Oscar for the performance for Bito Corleone instead. So the one that Brando rejected went to Charlie Chaplin. I love that photograph, which Chris will be very, very familiar with, of Ron Greenwood,

the great West Ham manager, on the tube with the FA Cup. So they've won the 1964 FA Cup. Which team's this? West Ham United. He was the manager. They've lifted the trophy at Wembley, great and he's like right, better go back to East London. Who's taking the cup? I'll take it on the cup. How are you getting home? I'll just go on the tube. He's just got it with him. It's fantastic. That's so brilliant. He's got it in a little green bag. Another thing we need to pop on our Instagram. There you go Crane, you can have a look at that. That is Ron Greenwood having just won the 1964 FA Cup with it in a bag on the train.

Oh, that's so brilliant. Amazing. We'll put this on the Instagram as well. I like the fact he sort of covered it in a run so that people don't see it and go, I'm going to have that. Beaten Preston, North End, 3-2 in the final. Oh, but great knowledge. There's another one. When Liverpool won the European Cup for the first time in 77, I think it was Phil Thompson. It might not have been the 77, but they went on that run. They won the European Cup four times between 77 and 84. One of the times, Phil Thompson, who was the captain, took it back to his social club

in Liverpool. And they were filling it with his mates' kids or having photos inside the European Cup. And it's really funny. The most coveted trophy in club football. The idea that you put your toddler in it and I just, yeah. You think they're treated with this great reverence but the FA Cup has been on the tube and the European Cup has been filled with... But I quite like that because it's like it's a lived history of the item isn't it? It's like, you know, rather than just being kept in some vacuum behind glass, It's nice that it's moved around and be held and be part

of the party afterwards and stuff. Yeah. I imagine it's got a couple of dinks on it and things like that by now. Great. There's one fact I know about where Kate Winslet keeps her Oscar that I've always remembered. I read it in a magazine interview with her. Now, if I had an Oscar, I would do exactly the same thing. Have a guess, which where does Kate Winslet keep her bathroom? Bathroom.

Bathroom. Yeah, yeah. She keeps it in the bathroom next to the mirror. So guess when they come over her house can grab it and practice their acceptance. Oh, nice. Oh, that's really nice. A little painful for acting friends who've yet to get them.

Especially if they've recently missed out on the award. I'll tell you what I'd love to do. Get nominated for an Oscar. Not win. You know when they divide the screen into four so they could see everyone's reaction. So, I don't know, argument's sake, best actor. You know, Hugh Jackman, Ellis James, Robert De Niro, and Timothy Charlemagne. And the Academy Award goes to Timothy Charlemagne. And I'd be like, oh for fuck's sake! Fucking hell, that guy, him! Has no one ever done that? Has no one ever done that? Has no one ever gone,

UGH! I think there are some people who've struggled to hide how they feel whilst clapping. But I would love to go- This is bullshit! Have you seen the film? Have you seen it? It's crap!

Jesus Christ! Now, as a final Oscar story to wrap up this section, this is the weirdest story of all. So, a couple of years after the mass theft in 2000, Whoopi Goldberg, great actor, sent her Oscar, which he won for best supporting actress for Ghost, to the Academy to be cleaned. I think you can clean it yourself, can't you? You're getting a bit brusseled. What are they doing? Exactly. Sending it in. It's just a dump cloth, isn't it?

Exactly, yeah. I mean, I'm about to clean my bike. Once we finish recording this, I'll clean my bike. It's the same principle. I probably wouldn't clean it in the garden. You don't send it into the sort of Tour de France headquarters, do you? You do it yourself. Sending it back to the shop. Exactly. So it travelled from New York to Los Angeles safely. But when it was repackaged and sent to Chicago, something went wrong. The box that arrived in Illinois was empty. Apparently, having been opened, the statue had been removed and the box had been resealed, sneaky, so it looked like it was still in there, but on arrival it was not. After a serious search, a statuette turned up, once again. Where do you think it turned up? In the bins.

A bin again! A bin at Ontario International Airport. This is what happens, people steal them, they can't sell them, they stick them in bins. A bin outside Ontario International Airport outside Los Angeles, which was apparently dumped there by whoever had done the pilfering in the first place. I don't know how in the world they would ever fence the darn thing, a spokesman explained to reporters, because statues are individually numbered in this case engraved with Goldberg's name. Oh, so it is engraved. I take that back. I was wrong earlier. And it remains in her house to this day. So there is a history here of people stealing Oscars, trying to sell them, and realising how it's impossible. I'm just going to have to stick this in a bin so I don't get in trouble. And that one sure will continue for eternity. You know when you call lost property, yeah, and my daughter lost a little bag full of her stuff at Euston, and you call lost property. Yeah. And my daughter lost a little bag full of her stuff at Euston.

And you call lost property and I often try to turn the screw emotions-wise so that they have a bigger look. So I was like... I'm dying. She's only nine. Yeah. She's only nine. She loves that little bag. Yeah. You know, would you do me a favour? You know, go above and beyond. Imagine calling up and saying, yeah, yeah, lost property. No, no, can you have a second look? Because it's an Oscar. It is my Oscar. And it's very hard to win again.

It's not like one of those bloody Golden Globes where every fucker's got one. This is an Oscar. Do you like... Find it now. bloody Golden Globes where every fucker's got one. This is an Oscar. Do you like... Find it now. I've spoken to a lot of footballers who have won a lot of things. I was in Sol Campbell's house not so long ago, clang. And he doesn't have like a trophy room.

Yeah. If I had won loads of trophies, there is 100% of room in my house that is like a museum to me. I want it all there. You ever see Michael Owen's house? You can Google it. It's got the Ballon d'Or in there. It's got all his trophies. You want a museum to you in your own house. Will Barron There's a great documentary about the 1988 men's 100 metre sprint final that Ben Johnson won. And then obviously had his medal stripped from him.

We're going to say Chris Skoltman. There's a medal taken off him because he'd been found to be taking anabolic steroids. And the very beginning of the documentary is him just searching through like an old shoe box in his garage. And he's just going through all his old medals because they don't mean anything to him. Wow.

Because he was world champion in 1987. He's like, oh yeah, there's a, what's that, yeah, world champion. That's so interesting. Yeah, it's really weird people's different relationships to things like that. All right, that's the end of part one. If you want part two right now, become an Oh What A Time full-timer and look forward to an upcoming Hitler special from Ian Kershaw's book. But there's loads of bonus episodes to be enjoyed too every month. Plus you get ad-free listing and episodes early for all that good

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