Oh What A Time... - #190 Plants & Dad’s Race Injuries (Part 1)

Episode Date: July 12, 2026

This week we’re turning to the natural world to see how humans have adapted various plants for all kinds of uses through history. We’ve got the chequered history of opium, the controversial garlic backstory and the true story of the humble potato.Elsewhere, we’re talking brutal sports day injuries for dads. Have you ever come unstuck on a sports day? You know what to do: [e-mail] 1 is released on Monday and Part 2 on Tuesday - but if you want more Oh What A Time and both parts at once, you should sign up for our Patreon! On there you’ll now find:•The full archive of bonus episodes•Brand new bonus episodes each month•OWAT subscriber group chats•Loads of extra perks for supporters of the show•PLUS ad-free episodes earlier than everyone elseJoin us at 👉 patreon.com/ohwhatatimeAnd as a special thank you for joining, use the code CUSTARD for 25% off your first month.You can also follow us on: X (formerly Twitter) at @ohwhatatimepodAnd Instagram at @ohwhatatimepodAaannnd if you like it, why not drop us a review in your podcast app of choice?Thank you to Dan Evans for the artwork (idrawforfood.co.uk).Chris, Elis and Tom x Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Oh, Whatter Time is now on Patreon. You can get main feed episodes before everyone else. Add free. Plus access to our full archive of bonus content, two bonus episodes every month, early access to live show tickets and access to the O Watertime Group chat. Plus, if you become an O Watertime All-Timer, myself, Tom and Ellis, will riff on your name to postulate

where else in history you might have popped up. For all your options, you can go to patreon.com forward slash O Watertime. Hello and welcome to Oh, what a time. It's a history podcast. And throughout this podcast, we've often talked about horrific injuries from history. And there's another one added to the list. Let me set the scene. It's Sports Day, the dad's race.

When I was a kid, my dad never did the dad's race. I thought, do you know what? Give my child a different upbringing. I'm going to do the dad's race every year. Little footnote to this. I can't tell you how little my daughter cares that I do the dad's race. In fact, she didn't even. even notice.

Yeah, yeah. I think my kids are embarrassed. My kids don't want me to do it. Why, because you win every time. It's embarrassing that you win every year. I mean, there is an element of that I am and beaten in Key Stage 1 and 2. Is that true? Yes.

Have you consistently want to... Before we get back to your story, Chris, because I've seen Ellis run and I've never thought that guy is lightning. Oh, you're not seeing the video? Do you want to see a couple of videos? Don't make him send a video around again. He's already gone for his phone. There's no choice of this, do I want to?

You're literally already on WhatsApp. It's saved to favourites as well, so it's heading straight to you now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I can't find it now, but if you need to see videos, I'll send you videos, Tom. Well, you're a talented man. You can describe it, Elle. I mean, what's the standard of people you're racing against? Sally Gunnell, Linford Christie, 1992.

Two or three, both fit. Two or three will go to the gym. One or two will play five side, and then one or two with the dance will be. running in like flip-flops. They are the ones I'm not scared of. It's the others you have to be aware of. Yeah, yeah. A couple years ago, we had a woman turning up in spikes because she was a very talented teenage athlete.

And she said, she said, this is my time to shine. And then she won her race by approximately 25 metres. It was unreal. So we have a winner in the group. Back to you, Scarl. Not to assume that you didn't win. What happened? Now, I'm just going to spell out. And L, Tom, feel free to correct me, but I do believe there is an etiquette to the dad's race.

Firstly, sportswear is frowned upon. And I think you want to be turning up looking too serious. You want to look like, it's a bit of fun. You can wear, I think you can wear, because I did mine this morning, by the way, we'll come to that later. I think you can wear trainers. I put on trainers. I didn't go in work. I would wear trainers anyway.

Yeah, exactly. I'm not formal wear. Don't need to wear a top hat. And dress shoes. I didn't go to my Key Stage 1 Sports Day in Chelsea boots. I'm like, right, let's do it there. Big old pair of Doc Martins. Chris tripping on the tail from his...

The other bit of etiquette that I find important is, I don't think you can be seen to stretch. Because again, it looks like you're taking it too seriously. Now, that particular piece of etiquette was my undoing. Now, firstly, there were too many dads to have a single race. There's three classes in my daughter's year. And there was just too many dads. So they did, they did heats.

So I was very, I was very tactical. I let the first heat go because that was more serious dad runners who were really keen. And then I was, I looked around and I picked a heat where I was like, I'm going to finish respectfully here. Got lined up, the teacher blew the whistle. I went away, I set off and straight away my. right hamstring popped. Oh my God.

But in front of the, in front of the whole school. Did you pull up? Pull up Michael Owen's style. All I could think about was Derek Redmond. But I, oh no. At the shame and embarrassment, I finished the race. I still didn't actually finish last. So, yeah, thank God for those flip-flop dads.

How close, well, how close to finishing last were you? A furlong. I'd say, I don't know, what's the running? I mean, were you second last? I mean, how, how? Second last, okay. Yeah, it's not a great achievement, but still it's something, yeah. Not coming last with one hamstring.

Right, listen, okay, listen, I'm not body shaming anyone, I'm not judging anyone. That dad has got to have a serious thing. Both of his hamstrings went no well, to be fair, the other guy. I'm lost to a guy with one hamstring. I think genuinely, I think it was the adrenaline that got me through it and not wanting to embarrass my daughter. So I finished the race and I went to my wife, Sophie, and I was like, you're not going to believe this.

I've popped my hammy. I felt it go like straight away. And then it was a bit funny. It was like, oh, I've popped your hamstring. And now here we are 24 hours later. It is agony. It is so painful. So do you actually think you've torn something then, maybe?

Yeah, I felt it. I felt it go. This is incredible. We were recording this the day after the England game. I was straight on Google. Here are my symptoms. I felt pop. Go to A and E.

I wanted to reply, it's England versus Congo tonight. I've got plans. I can't. Google said, were you in the dad's race? I'm getting a lot of questions like this recently. It's that time of year again.

I pulled out of one dad's race because there were too many people on the track and I thought what's going to happen is someone is going to fall. And if one person falls, we all fall. and then we're all off work. And it's not a good enough excuse to tell your boss, or heaven for any of yourself employed.

Yeah. Sorry, I can't do that thing. There were 30 of us in 10 lanes at the Dad's Race. The headmistress at our school, as I say, I did the Sports Day this morning, was telling me before our race that a parent in a neighbouring school had tripped during the Dad's Race, broken his leg, and his job was a dancer,

and then he couldn't work for six months. So it does happen. And our fellow friend, Josh Whittaker, at his school, this is two years ago, I think, in the tug of war, parents' tug of war, the rope broke. And one of the dads broke his arm, yeah, he then sees the school. But that's a different story. But yeah, it's really, it happens. To be fair, I think if the rope breaks. Was that a draw?

And it's the school's rope. I would be a bit annoyed about that and I broke my arm. Also, I tell you one thing, if the raw bricks, it's a strong sense. a dad's. What is them a hunky dad? The hunky dads and there's going to be collateral damage. So my race this morning, I came second and I was delighted about this and Claire had filmed it.

So I rushed after you got out of her work meeting and said, can I see the video? She's done one of those things where she thinks she's filmed it, which she's got it the wrong way around and has actually sort of lifted up the phone to start and then stop recording. And so it's kind of, it's just like, it's of no value whatsoever. I then said on the parents' WhatsApp group, I came second, delighted about this. And then someone sent around a photo, a photo finish, which proves I actually came third. So it was, but people do take it really seriously, don't they? They really, really go for it.

I did a little stretch this morning. It wasn't a thing at my school. Was it not? No. I put on shorts this morning to make sure I can move properly. I thought it was a bit of a myth. Yeah. And then the first sports day I attended.

they were like, right, it's time for the dance race. I was like, what? And all these more experienced dance, limbering up. Yeah. Wow, yeah. But it's fun. But well, Chris, well done for giving it a go.

I'm sorry, your body. I'm so painful to sit down. This is going to be a tough old pod. I can't believe you're unbeaten as well, Al. That's just, that's remarkable. What can I say? With one of the dad-drad racing grates, one of the grats of our generation.

One of the greatest dad races of his generation. Now, El, you're constantly winning, Chris, less so. What is important, if you want to be a great athlete, it's a great diet, isn't it? That's what matters. And what is this episode all about? It's about vegetables. The history of vegetables is what we're doing today. Vegetables and plants.

Do you remember the Diana winning the Mums race? Yeah, of course, yeah. Yeah. Would she barefooted or something? I think she's barefooted and she's running in a long dress. And as I said, it wasn't something that happened in my primary school and thought it was purely a sort of a press opportunity, like a marketing opportunity. But I got her hand it to her.

She looked quite fast over 40 yards style. Is she the fastest monarch of all time? I totally forgot about that. Yeah, she was fast, wasn't she? I mean, she looks like she runs. the people sprinter, that's what they called her, didn't they? Why were their cameras? That's like, that would never happen now, would it?

You wouldn't have cameras turn up at a sports day. How did they get away with that? Well, I mean, there were cameras following her everywhere. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. She was quite famous, Chris, are she? Yeah. She was pretty well known. Do you know what as well?

There's enough pressure on a dad's race without the cameras. So she, you know, fair play. To pull it out a performance like that on the bigger stage. Yeah, it would have been, although she'd come second, the person who'd won would have then been briefly famous for 24 hours. Everyone would know her name. But unfortunately, Diana, the fastest monarch of all time, hammered her competition into dust. I was trying to think this morning that obviously it's a down's race, that's the Olympic sport they've gone for. What would be the worst sport that they could have chosen for a dad's event at the end?

I think it's Greco wrestling. Sorry for the end of every sports day. Pairs of dads have to go and stand in the arena, the grassy arena and a grapple. Yeah. Right. Okay. There's the cage. It's time for Dad's UFC.

Chris's hammy goes in the first two seconds. He's faced by some six or five ex-mugby player. Some guy whose son is in year three. just keeps hitting him. Claire slapping the Mac because she's submitting and the headmistress hasn't noticed. I went to it on my free boats.

Did you film it? Did you film any of it? Do you know what? It was quite tribal yesterday at Sports Day because when it got to the dad's race, the whole school of year two's was going, Dad's race, Dad's race. It felt very, I'd like the idea of them all going,

fight to the death, fight to the death, the cage. Beat him. Beat him. We are evil. Beat him. Blood spattered kids going back to school for the rest of the day. Well, that was fun.

God, I was so embarrassed by my dad. He got all his teeth knocked out. He was rubbish. Yeah, well, my dad lost an ear. He blacked out after six seconds. Incredible. Another way you bit my dad's nose off. Your dad's great.

Right. As I say, Today's episode is about that athlete adjacent subject of vegetables and plants and the history of those things. I'm today, I'm going to be talking about the history of garlic, which is just, it's genuinely fascinating. It's incredible, the history of garlic in this country. What are you guys going to be talking about? I will be talking about the history of the potato. Bit edgier, plant for me, opium.

Oh, wow. Yeah. Your favourite, Chris. Hence the reason you weren't in peak condition come the dad's race. Because you've been, you spent another night in the opium den rather than stretching. Right. Before that, though, should we do a little bit of correspondence? Two lovely DMs this week on Instagram.

I thought, I'll check our DMs. I don't do that enough. Always use the emails. DMs come up trumps. First one, Nikki Cottgrove has said, and this is the Beatles versus the killers, listeners who may not be across that. Chris thinks the killers are about the Beatles. That's the context you need for this message.

Well, you say thinks. I say there's a whole selection of data points which prove my point and I think you're about to introduce another one. Well, this is a data point, Chris, exactly. His mind is as fragile as his hamstrings. I just heard his mind pop. In Chris's defence, the longest charting Beatles single in the UK charts was for 33 weeks.

Do you know what that was, Elle? Yesterday. She loves you. Oh, was it? There you go. For those of you playing at home, says Nicky. By comparison, Mr. Brightside has spent 500 weeks in the UK charts and is an absolute bop. Yeah, but that's a great phrase.

Because that involves streaming. The metrics are different. Yeah. He's famously can't stream any Beatles songs. You bought, yeah, but you bought She Loves You, in 1963 when it was released and then you had it forever. You didn't buy it every time you listen to it. That is a superberate. turn there from Ellis from the back.

He's really absolutely arrowed that across court. Chris, chances are returning it? Yeah, but you're essentially saying that, oh, well, you know, the killers are successful because of where they are on the timeline. But, you know, the Beatles had the entire, as I've said before,

they had the entire canvas of popular culture and pop music to paint with. The killers found a little section, and my word, they've painted the Sistine Chapel of Indy Rock. So he's got it back, Elle, but it's not a great shot. And it's sort of hovering quite high above the net. It's a real chance for a slam if you want to take it here. I say culture had existed prior to 1960.

In your opinion. Right. Thank you for that, Nicky. We'll leave it to you, the list of the side, who won that point. I actually, I could actually, I'd like to posit an exact moment where culture started, the release of hot fuss. Right. That is an absolutely crazy attitude. Next email. Let's move on.

Next email from Evie. Hi team, love the pod. I'm Australian and I'm listening to a recent episode on education. And I remembered something about corporal punishment in Australia, which is regulated on a state-by-state basis. Because we discussed when corporal punishment died a death. Well, this is pretty amazing. The last school in Western Australia using corporal punishment was forced to stop in,

Do you want to guess? 2005. 2005, Elle's gone with, Scull. 2020. Closer from Scull, 2015. It's when it was still around till when the laws change. This school did actively use it in conjunction with prayer as a discipline method until then. Doesn't sound like a fun institution.

As a trio who grew up watching Australian soaps, I always thought Australian schools looked quite cool. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah. When I was growing up, I'd quite like to go to an American high school, actually. Yeah. An Australian high school, sorry, I should say. Yeah. Although I think it's because it was always sunny.

And I'm going to talk about our Patreon offering very briefly. We did a great clip show for the last Patreon special. And Tom chose an amazing clip of Britain's hardest working man from 1961, guy with nine kids and seven jobs. So we start off. All in the same small village as well. All in the same village. on the same day. So he's a grave digger, a postman, a fireman.

Don't give it all away. You want to go to find out and sign up. But Tom, more than Chris and I, was quite enamored with this guy's lifestyle. Yeah. And kept saying, you know, this guy feels like he's contributing to his community. He was working a 100-plus hour week, which Tom didn't seem bothered by at all. But I think I've worked out why you find it such an appealing prospect. It's because in the film the weather's nice.

Yes. You're so right. I think that is a lot of it, yeah. He's working as a grave digger and he has a nice cup of tea. It looks quite pleasant much as doing that in a pissing rain. Such a good point. It is. It's nice weather, nice backdrop walking around his little village.

It's the same as Aussie schools and the soaps. It just seems pleasant, doesn't it? Well, I mean, you think 2015 is shocking. The message goes on. It is still technically legal in private schools in Queensland. It's a corporal punishment. It's still illegal there. However, a quick Google search indicates that it's not really practiced. But technically, you can get a whack if you go to a private school in Queensland.

So there you go. 2015. Good grief. Very recent history. Thank you, Eve for sending that in. Thank you very much, Nikki, for your contentious point about the Beatles versus the killers. If anyone else wants to get in contact, you can do it on DM. You can email us.

Actually, here's all the ways. All right, you horrible luck. Here's how you can stay in touch with the show. You can email us at hello at oh what a time.com and you can follow us on Instagram and Twitter at Oh, what a time, pod. Now clear off. Right, before we get on with the show, I'm just going to do a little plug and I'm going to aim it particularly at our well-a-time.

speaking listeners, but not just our Welsh speaking listeners, our Welsh speaking listeners who are based in London, and it should be 50,000 of them. And 50,000 sounds like quite a lot, which is why I've decided to put in five gigs, and yes, I'm struggling to sell them. So basically, this is a charm offensive. I am doing a bigger, big gig at the Estepovod in August.

I'm not worried about the tickets for that, but I am worried about the warm-ups. I'm not worried. I mean, there's, you know what I mean? The warmups are what I'm focused on at the moment. So on the 23rd of July, I'm doing ABC in Kennington, which is my favourite gig in England, and I think might be Tom's as well. It's amazing, which is incredible.

The 26th, the great Daniel Kitson, is organising a festival at Stanley Halls in South Norwood. So there's loads of great English language stuff on. The bill is brilliant, but I'm doing a Welsh language show at 2.15pm at Stanley Halls in the 26th. And then on the 1st and 2nd of August, I'm doing the London Welsh Centre and all the proceeds go to the London Welsh School in Hanwell

and then on the third of August I'm back at ABC in Kennington and I'm also because the Welsh shows have sold out so I'm doing well on the 18th in Cardiff and I'm actually doing a matinee and that's only just gone on sale all of the links should you want to buy tickets

are available on my website LsJames.com We'll also stick them on our Instagram as well Oh thank you And it's in my Instagram bio as well. So if you're a Welsh speaker or you know a Welsh speaker and we get a butt of it, let them know. Because my stand-up's quite mainstream, so there's something for everyone.

Isn't it true that there was an English speaker who used to come and see you do Welsh gig sometimes? And we just sort of sit there and enjoy the rhythm of the night. I think you mentioned this once. But I happened to be in Edinburgh. Yeah, I did a Welsh language gig in Edinburgh and someone came because they just liked hearing me speak if they didn't understand it. And what was very interesting was when everyone else laughed,

They were about half a second later. They go, ha ha ha ha ha ha. That's quite sweet. So with that in mind, would you encourage English speakers to come? No. Okay. That was just that once. But it is untenable on a large scale.

Yeah. Well, there you go. If you're a Welsh speaker, you go and see L, obviously one of the best stand-ups around. And those shows will be absolutely fantastic. So, shall we crack into some history proper? Should we do that?

So later in this episode, I'm going to be talking about the history of garlic in Britain and it is a genuinely fascinating story. And I'll be talking about potatoes and Ireland. Time now to talk about the ancient world's most powerful plant. It's time for opium poppy.

So before it becomes chemistry, opium is actually agriculture. It's funny with opium and poppy's like, I don't really understand it. Like it's so many different uses. I don't really know how they all come together. I don't really know the particular poppy. It's so confusing to me.

It's like a mega plant. Yeah. When do you see it? He's got lots of uses. It is basically drugs, isn't it? Heroin, and to remember the dead. Morphine comes from it. Remembrance, the poppy seed on bread, that's fine.

Oh, the poppy seed, of course. It does have a lot of innocent youth. I mean, I don't get any natural high from toast made with poppy seed bread. I'll have to watch up for that next time. It's fun, can I say that I don't. really understand. I'd never go out of my way to get some bread because it's got poppy seeds on.

If anything, I don't know what it's bringing to the table. Yes, I agree with you. I think maybe on some level it makes people feel they're eating more healthily. If I see seeds on a loaf of bread, I think, well, that's the better option for me. That's what I'm thinking. Yeah, I agree.

But next time, I'm going to eat 300 slices to try and see if they're in natural high of it. Have you heard about what's happening? what happened to L? He's addicted to poppy seeds via the medium of massive loafs of bread. He's on about 900

slices of toast a day. He's spending an evening with a libertines. They're making their way through a granary. Granary bloomer. Very mild high. Yeah. Oh dear. So what we mean when we talk about opium

is the opium poppy, Latin name, Papavur, somnifera, a tall four-petal flower with a distinctive seed capsule that yields when scored a milky sap. And it's that sap that is one of the most powerful substances in nature. Aren't humans, Matt, like, it feels like the whole time humans has been on the planet. They're just grabbing plants, crushing them up, mixing them.

We're getting coffee out of it. We're getting opium. I'm trying to get high. Yeah. Or change the states that they're in. Yeah. Like we've been drinking booze for. thousands of years.

Or, I suppose, often getting high, and then because of that, repeating that process. Yeah. So that's what it'll be often. Yeah, and also, you know how like fermented food, like kimchi and sauerkraut and stuff like and kefir, who looks at

a fermented thing and thinks, I'm going to put that in my mouth, actually. But also, these are the experiments that worked. So can you imagine how many billions and billions have failed experiments of mixing water and milk with plants, people dying, horrible deaths as they experiment in the wilderness with these plants. A quick note on the poppy family, the bright red remembrance

poppy worn in Britain each November is a different species entirely. Pappava Roes, a common field poppy, famous for growing on the churned battlefields of the Western Front. The opium poppy is much bigger and paler, usually white, pink or purple, and cultivated for chemistry. rather than symbolism. That's a very good fact. Didn't know that. Yeah. So I've been smoking the wrong one then.

That's annoying. Okay. That's useful information. So on the 12th of November every year, you harvest used remembrance poppies. But your remembers poppy. Do you remember them? We will remember them.

Actually, I won't. Do you honest, I can't remember this morning. I can't remember why have a breakfast. On my own name. Ellis remembers them. but he's in a 900 slice of toast stooper over there. Druling in the corner after its eighth loaf of the day.

Yeah. As we mentioned, opium poppies do give us one everyday product. The seeds, which are technically opiate-free. They're scattered on breads, muffins, biscuits and kitchens all around the world. It doesn't say that on the back,

does it? On the Kingsville back. Bracket-opiate-free. Oh, boring. So the earliest known written reference to opium comes from ancient Sumer in what is now southern Iraq around 3,400 BC. The Samarians called the opium poppy

the hulgill, which literally meant the joy plant. They mixed its juice with water or wine to produce a mild narcotic drink. From Sumer, knowledge of the plant spread outwards along the trade routes of the ancient near east, first to Assyria, then to Egypt, and then across into Persia, into Greece. Eventually, it made its way to Rome. And along the way, opium become one of the earliest global commodities.

By the era of the pharaohs, opium was well-established in Egypt. And I love this fact. When Tutankarmoon's tomb was opened in the 1920s, archaeologists found jars containing what appeared to be residues of opium juice, a suggestion that even a boy pharaoh in the 14th century BCE was surrounded by the drug. It's kind of like Red Bull of its day except it's not Red Bull, is it?

What would be the opposite? A boy as a king is problematic enough. A boy on drugs is a king. There has to be a better way than this. Well, they opened his tomb, they found a hundred baggies and a number for a guy. Called the Powder Man or somewhere. Pirate glyphrix.

Is that a BMW? If Tune Carmoon, died in 2026. They'd open that tumour, would be full of those little nitrous oxide cans I sometimes see in the gutters. You do balloons. Do balloons. That's amazing.

So it was obviously just part of everyday life and culture in that case. Yeah. Also striking was a discovery involving Persian King, Zerkesse I, who ruled in the 5th century BCE. Jars inscribed with his name, but manufactured in Egypt,

have been tested by modern scientists who found traces of morphine in the residue. And morphine is one of the primary active compounds of opium. Its presence in those jars, essentially, chemical proof that opium was being traded internationally more than 2,500 years ago. It's huge trade. And that also puts to rest the popular myth that Alexander the Great introduced opium to Persia. This is proof that it was there long before Alexander had arrived.

Interesting, isn't it? Yeah, fascinating. The first surviving Greek reference to opium comes from the poet Hesiod, writing in the 8th century BCE. He described the city of Corinth, one of the largest cities in the ancient world, as poppy town because of the sheer scale of poppy cultivation in the surrounding countryside. Corinthian mythology reinforced the link. The goddess Dementa, deity of agriculture and fertility, was said to have discovered the poppy near Corinth. Painted plates often showed her holding wheat in one hand and poppies in the other. Poppies were also associated with the gods of the darker side of Greek belief.

So hypnosis, the god of sleep, Nix, the god of the night, and thanatos, the god of death. The message was clear that this was a plant of dreams, unconsciousness and mortality all at the same time. Right. It's funny how it feels such a part of society in a way that there is, I don't know, it's frowned upon now, isn't it? Whereas it's just so culturally embedded opium in the societies of the past. Yeah, but it's booze, isn't it? Yeah, I suppose it's booze. Can you imagine removing booze from British society?

Yeah. If the ancient Egyptians that have organised a World Cup, it would have been sponsored by opium on the hoardings around the side. When I worked in an office, pretty much everyone I worked with, they were drinking every night. Yeah. And when we went on to conference, and away days and things.

You know everyone will always go out and have a drink in the evening. The world would collapse if you band alcohol. But if it was discovered now, it would instantly be a Class A drug and it would be privated. The clearest ancient medical account comes from the Greek philosopher and botanist Theophrastus in his work Inquiry Into Plants, one of the earliest botanical textbooks in history. Theophrastus describes a poppy juice drink he called

maconian and made by mixing the sap with water or wine, its effects he explained could be tuned by dose. So if you've got the quantity small, it relieves pain. In larger doses, it will induce sleep. In stronger doses still, it will kill you. You've really got to get the dosage right. Do read what it says on the label. You can see that the chart from the scientist as well where he's filled in the first one, the final one, strongest dough, and he just has, there's no. The conclusion section is completely blank. One other thing that this reminds me of

is that poisons was such a big thing in the past, weren't they? Like, offing people. And actually growing up and learning about history, I thought poisons would be a far bigger danger in my adult life than they've turned out to be. Yeah, it's like quicksand, isn't it? You're terrified that there's going to be quicksand everywhere. I don't think I've ever seen it,

and you're worried you're going to get poisoned. Like, Russ Sputin was poisoned, and lots of the people I studied at school were poisoned. I always used to the thing, I just don't think I'd drink the poison. Of all these people from history who were poisoned, did they never consider not drinking the poison? This is about sharp, isn't it? Poison's always green and smoking as well if movies have taught me anything.

Maybe because it's in Romeo and Juliet as well. It's just poison is everywhere in the past. If I had an enemy and my enemy said, Go on, El. Made you a cup of tea, drink this. Instantly alarm bells. Oh, thanks, mate. Let bygones be bygones.

You'd at least say, can I have your mug? And if they then refuse and go, no, I'd rather you had that one. You know there's something up. Yes. Pour it in the plant. See if the plant dies. The plant instantly ages like the guy in Indiana Jones who drinks from the wrong chalice. Ah.

Exactly. Given how long humans have been cultivating opium, it's no surprise that the ancient world developed with sophisticated technology around it. Surviving evidence includes that you could get written how-to manuals for how to harvest and prepare opium. You'd get specialist scoops for collecting the sap. Assyrians called there's the Arat Papal,

custom-made trade jars for transporting it across the Mediterranean. By the time of the Roman Empire, opium was available almost everywhere that Rome ruled from Northern Britain to North Africa, from Iberia to the eastern edge of the Empire near the Black Sea. Opium continues to be used across medieval Europe. In medieval England, one common anaesthetic was a drink called Duale, which is a rough analogue of the Greek maconium, and one of its key ingredients was opium.

But everything changed with the Crusades. The outbreak of religious warfare between Christian Europe and the Islamic world from the 11th century onwards changed European attitudes to many eastern imports, opium was one. So by around 1300 AD references to opium had almost disappeared from European medical texts. It became associated with the Muslim world, the unfamiliar east

and therefore with sin. The Catholic Inquisition imposed strict penalties on anyone caught possessing or using it. For nearly 200 years, opium was officially a taboo substance in Christian Europe. Unofficially, of course, it never really went away. That's interesting, wasn't it? It was associated with connotations of the East.

and therefore kind of went away from it. Opium was formally readmitted to European medicine in the early 16th century, largely thanks to the Swiss physician Paracelsus, a major figure of the German Renaissance and one of the early Protestants. Working as a city physician in Basel in 1520s,

Paracelsus began openly promoting opium as a legitimate medical remedy. He is often credited as the man who created the tincture that would later be called laudanum. and there is a wrinkle in this. That was massive for a while. Yeah, it was huge, isn't it?

Like, widespread and you would buy it in the chemists and like just people, Lorden of poisoning was a huge thing. Yes. People just go mad from it, but you just buy it over the counter. There's that great book, Confessions of an English opium meter.

Yeah. By Thomas de Quincy, which is about his laudanum addiction. Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah. But it was very widespread and people, it really was something you'd buy from respectable chemists.

You'd go there and you buy it as you were to drug now. Sherlock Holmes was on the Lordium. Exactly. Yeah, he was. That's one of the few opium facts I've got in my own store of knowledge that Sherlock Holmes was addicted to, like, opium. Yeah. Paracelsus did not get his opium from a Swiss field.

He got it from Venice. Venetian traders acquired opium through their networks running by Constantinople and the wider Ottoman Empire. Their rivals in Genoa did the same. Both cities produced and sold a concoction known as Thierac, A medieval super drug Widely prized as a remedy for almost any ailment Its ingredients included opium, dried viper skin

And a long list of herbal compounds I think they sell that at my local petrol station Do you ever see that those weird little health things That you're just like, what are they? In a petrol station Yeah, or maybe it's an American thing I think it is an American thing I've never seen them in my local shell garage

Have you been able to buy dried viper skin Did Paracelsus really reintroduce opium to European medicine Or was he simply repackaging what Italian merchants Had been quietly trading for decades? The answer is probably a bit of both. Opium has never truly left. It was only waiting for a physician willing enough to name it again. So that's a little insight into the history of opium.

Very interesting. What I find interesting is the links to... gods and that sort of stuff you mentioned earlier on when talking about Egypt. It seems that early drug use, if you look at stuff like ayahuasca and things like this, there was like a spiritual

element to it, wasn't it? It was trying to get yourself from some higher plane. That's obviously changed the use. But that does suggest it's sort of in keeping with that vibe of drug use. People are trying to change their mind and dream and see things

and understand their world in a different way what it happens to be. I love a good ayahuasca documentary. Yeah. Sitting in my living room watching Americans spewing up for eight hours. Do you know, are you familiar with the best ayahuasca documentary? Hosted by Gwyneth Paltrow. Have you seen?

Oh, well. Should we do a watch along of that? It is, why not? Of course we can. As I'm a Patreon. It's one of my favorite things that I've ever seen. It is incredible. Oh, great.

Should we do it? Okay. So does she take ayahuasca? She doesn't. She makes all the members of her staff take it. And they send them out to Mexico. I'm seeing ethical problems with this documentary already. Yeah, I don't.

So I watched it with my wife. Maybe we should save the gold a little bit. But I'm like, isn't this like, you can't as an employer force your workers to go to Mexico and take ayahuasca? I don't understand. why anyone does it. I can't imagine for one moment anyone has true enlightening experience but it's a hell of a documentary.

I don't want spiritual enlightenment enough to be sick that much. That's what I always think. Leave me unenlightened. My main question there would be. Are her employees still having to do these sort of admin-y jobs are there like their head of social media

still having to work out what to write underneath an Instagram post when they don't know their own name and they're... Andy, I don't know what I don't know what's in my calendar for Friday.

Oh! He's like... Andy, I don't know what I'm going to be doing on Friday. I know I've got meetings but I'm not being sent a link. Andy can see his great grandmother

at this point and is crying. Andy thinks he's on fire. Exactly, yeah. Keep that separate from work, surely. I'm up for that. We'll do a watch along that for that. I don't know if I've found

the right one. It's called the Goop Lab with Gunniff Paltrow. I think she says this is the episode description I think it is. Flying to Jamaica, they take magic mushrooms and experience psychedelic psychotherapy. So I don't know if it is actually ayahuasca, but they definitely they take quite heavy psychedelics. So we'll do a watch along for

our Patreon. And why don't we for our patrons do a special where we take ayahuasca in it an eight hour long podcast? I will get Jordia redid to nip out all of the spools. And if anyone knows how to make something that looks like ayahuasca so you can trick your friends

to thinking you take on ayahuasca, do let me know on DM on Instagram. I'll be a good laugh, wouldn't it? Proper house party trick. Well, that's the end of part one. If you want part two of vegetables or plants, we're not sure on the exact episode title, you can get it right now.

And boys, what will you be speaking about in part two? I'm going to be talking about the history of garlic in Britain, which is kind of a, it's a mad story. Basically, it was loved, then hated, like deeply hated and then loved again. You want to find out about that. That'll be in part two. Lovely.

And I will be talking about potatoes. Potatoes? Well, the Irish, you know, the Irish famine and also, the story of the potatoes very, very interesting. I knew some of it already, so maybe, I don't know, maybe I'm the exception and I've got an awful lot of potato knowledge,

but I actually studied potatoes. just in year nine. I did a documentary. Not a documentary, a coursework. Bafton nominated documentary in year nine. I did some coursework where I was in correspondence with the head of the potato marketing board. Is that true?

Yeah, which is a very easy job because Britain loves chips. Mr Spud? So what were you in correspondence? Well, I just sent off, I said, I'm in year nine, I'm doing cookery sort of at DT and I've got a right the coursework about a vegetable so I'd love to do potatoes and I know that you are at the

potato marketing board he sent me back so much stuff and I worked so hard on my potato coursework and I remember getting 57% and thinking are you taking the piss miss 57% for this you've seen the contact I'm using

the top potato guy in Wales what more do you want birds eye potato waffles chips Ross potatoes, new potatoes mash, there are others. If your mum still has that, I would gladly read that. Anyway, if you want all of that stuff,

straight away right now, sign up to the Patreon. It is there for you. Otherwise, we'll see you guys tomorrow. Bye. Bye. Oh, what time is now on Patreon. You can get main feed episodes before everyone else. Add free, plus access to our full archive of bonus content. Two bonus episodes every month.

Early access to like. live show tickets and access to the O-Watertime group chat. Plus if you become an O-Water-Time All-Tamer, myself Tom and Ellis will riff on your name to postulate where else in history you might have popped up. For all your options, you can go to patreon.com forward slash oh-water time.