Ologies with Alie Ward - Desairology (MORTUARY MAKE-UP) with Monica Torres

Episode Date: October 27, 2020

What happens when you die? Cosmically, no one knows. But cosmetically, Desairologist Monica Torress knows everything. This friendly Phoenix funeral director shares her secrets for giving the dearly departed the greatest glam on their “special day.” She chats practical preservation techniques, spooky questions, her influences, the newest make-up lines, formaldehyde, mourning and grief, and how to make sure you look like *you* -- or Dolly Parton -- when your loved ones say their goodbyes. Also: her most memorable cases and JUST the pep talk you needed to follow your dreams. Follow Monica Torres at Instagram.com/coldhandshosts and Twitter.com/coldhandshosts NXT Gen Mortuary Support: nxtgenmortuarysupport.com A donation went to the Hi Precious Scholarship: nxtgenmortuarysupport.com/scholarship/ Sponsors of Ologies: alieward.com/ologies-sponsors More links at alieward.com/ologies/desairology Transcripts & bleeped episodes at: alieward.com/ologies-extras Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month: www.Patreon.com/ologies OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, pins, totes and now… MASKS. Hi. Yes. Follow twitter.com/ologies or instagram.com/ologies Follow twitter.com/AlieWard or instagram.com/AlieWard Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media & Steven Ray Morris Theme song by Nick ThorburnSupport the show: http://Patreon.com/ologies

Oh, hello. It's the Kleenex that you forgot to take out of your pocket before you ran it through the washer and dryer and made 4,000 baby Kleenexes. Alleyward. Back with the final episode of this year's Spooktumor series. And true to my promise, they are getting a little closer to the heart and the dead, the closer we approach Halloween. And in hindsight, I don't know if that was a good idea for 2020 since Halloween is just going to go butt to butt with the presidential election. But you know what? Oddly, death episodes tend to be really inspiring and life-affirming. So let's just press on. I promise by the end of this, you may be giving your job the finger or reaching out to tell people you love them.

Mom, dad, I love you. Thanks for making me. See, look, I just did it. Okay, but first, a few more thanks to all the folks on patreon.com who send in questions. You can join that club for as little as one single American dollar a month. We set a low bar. Come on in. And thank you to everyone who makes sure you're subscribed and who writes a show and who writes reviews for me to read. On days when my anxiety gets better of me, such as egg salad 19, who wrote, listening to old dad word is like a big cozy ear hug every episode, even when the subject matter scares me slightly. It's just too interesting to press pause. Egg salad 19 buckle up. And thank you to everyone who left such sweet ass reviews. All of you, I read every single one. I'm earnestly

so grateful for it. Okay, desirology. So this is a real word and it was coined by a legend in the field like a pioneer of professional funeral fanciness, Noella Papogno, who authored the 1983 classic desirology, the dressing of decedent hair. So she was a hairstylist. She just passed away about three years ago. And she believed that her clients should be served after death as well, and that more care and attention needed to be paid to the dearly departed to make them look their best as they're bereaved, say goodbye. And I found a clip. Here she is introducing the world to this ology in the early 1980s. Dear professionals, for over 30 years, one of my greatest rewards has a hairstylist has been my work for funeral homes. I would like to share that experience with you. For

three years, hairstyling for decedent has been in the making. The story of techniques touching all phases of hairstyling for a decedent needs telling. This manual of desirology describes these techniques in detail. Understanding your needs in this field and catering to them is what this book is all about. Thank you. Legend. So Noella dubbed her work desirology because it was a portmanteau, kind of a Franken word of deceased and hair. So desirology. But it tends to capture kind of all the glam given to folks before a viewing. And I first heard of this ology probably two, three years ago, actually from Megan Rosenblum, the anthropodermic biocodacologist from last week's episode. And this ologist holds many titles. She owns the next generation mortuary support in Phoenix. And I was

hoping for a few years for like a dusty road trip to the desert to take in her immaculate lab and smell the rows and rows of solutions and bottles and brushes and blushes. But alas, digital conversation in the times of COVID would have to do. So we hopped on and we chatted all about the mortuary business, the particulars of embalming, reconstruction, her most memorable cases and some heartwarming ones, whether she's ever perhaps seen or maybe felt any presences, and who dominates the funeral business, spa services for recently deceased, why you should just let things go. And well, how to effortlessly look your best. So lean back on a satin pillow and get ready for world renowned desirologist, Monica Torres.

Yeah, my name is Monica Torres. And I'm a licensed embalmer, licensed funeral director, postmortem reconstructive specialist and desirologist. I know that's really long. Great. I've been doing this one. And the pronouns you use? I'm a she. I'll go with she. My scholarship actually that I founded is helps women and transgender individuals gain technical skills in funeral service and embalming and management skills. So that's something that's important to me to learn how that community is what they're expecting from like the older, like more like experienced generations too. And you mentioned you were a desirologist. Is that a word that gets used a lot? I know it was

invented in the 80s, right? Yeah, that's right. That's right. It's not used a lot. If you're like a regular just layperson that has no experience in funeral service or embalming, it's not heard a lot. So don't feel bad because most funeral directors and embalmers have not heard of it either. Which came first? Were you more interested in makeup or were you more interested in funeral services? Yeah, I think those are really good questions because it seems like I get a lot of people asking me these questions on my social media. And even in my email inbox, it's like, how did you get involved in this? So my background is unique in the sense that I was actually a licensed cosmetologist before I became a licensed mortician. So I had a background already when

I went into mortuary science and mortuary college in cosmetology. So the love of makeup came first here. But in a pretty gender conforming society, it's more common for ladies to be hands-on with contouring than corpses. Back then, I did know that desirology existed because I had researched it before I went into mortuary college. But I also found out that it was just not very common. Because the industry is so largely populated by men, it is a male dominated field. It kind of was just not something that was important to the professionals that were running the industry. But things are changing. You know, there's more women now, most of our mortuary college classes, the college itself, as far as the students, the women outnumber the men now. So I think that desirology, there's going

to be exploration in that area as far as postmortem rejuvenation and treatments on the body. Now that there's more women, I think that that's something that we're going to bring to the table that's never been done before. Wait, it comes to makeup. Is there something about the artistry of it that you love? Were you like a really artistic kid? Were you always painting or drawing or what did you love about that? Yeah, it's funny you asked that because I was. I started drawing skulls from like the time that I was very little. So back then, you know, my parents were mortified that I was drawing skulls and dead things. They did not understand or like that. And I honestly, I didn't even really understand it. I just, it was just very natural to me. So yes, I was, I've been an

artist like since I could remember, I've always loved to draw and paint and sculpt and use charcoal. And I was really involved in art when I was in high school. I, you know, did all the banners for the football team to run through and all that. So yeah. And how do you feel in general about holidays when the rest of society sort of dips into behind that curtain into spookiness? Like, I grew up like goth. And so whenever I saw everyone being goth for like the week of Halloween, I'd be like, come on, we're out here every week. But how is someone who works in funeral services and mortuary science? Is that a holiday that you're so over or not? It's so funny that you asked that because like growing up, I was always like, I was

kind of a goth chick too. And but that was like, that was just how I always was. Like, I was always like that when I was from the time that I was very little. I just found beauty in the darker things in life. Halloween was like my favorite holiday for many, many years. And as I've gotten older, not just Halloween, but like a lot of the holidays, I'm so busy with work that my life doesn't stop for Halloween or Christmas or Valentine's Day as a mortician, you know, we don't have holidays off typically. So it's hard for me to like embrace the the spooky vibes and stuff because I it's my life. And I also I'm so busy serving families and other funeral directors. But I mean, I try because I know people expect me to like they expect they're like, oh my gosh, you're like the death

queen, like you should be having the spookiest house. Every day is Halloween in my world. Like the like that ministry song, right? Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I always think about. Yeah. So and what was it like for you to make that transition from the cosmetology side of it into mortuary services? What door opened to let you combine the two? Yeah, so it's really hard as a woman in this industry. It's really hard to make headway because it is, like I said, it is still predominantly run by men, all the leadership positions, the decision makers are still men. So, you know, I really had to go above and beyond what my my skill level was. And that if you look deep into my background, you'll find that I have

a very deeply rooted background in technical skills. Okay, what does it take to be a Monocatoris? A lot of school and passion. So she first got her bachelor's in recreation and event management because funerals, they are kind of parties after all. And she's been a licensed cosmetologist for 20 years. And while still an embalming intern, she completed a desirology course named Airbrush Artistry for Cosmetic Use in the Prep Room and Restorative Art. She's also trained in post-mortem reconstructive demi-surgery from the Fountain National Academy of Professional Embalming Skills. She's certified as a crematory operator and has been recognized in her industry with awards. She graced the cover of Funeral Director Magazine, and she's pioneered hair restoration that her

peers now dub the No Wax Taurus technique. So my point, she has serious chops. I wanted to make sure that the men that I was working alongside understood that my technical skills were on point. And that they, you know, if they had a question for me, I had an answer. Because I found that that was a stumbling block for a lot of men in our industry when it came to cosmetology and makeup. So now that I have that skill base, and I've completed the program at Fountain National Academy of Professional Embalming Skills, which is in my industry, that's the most elite embalming college that you can go to. There's less than 60 individuals worldwide that have completed the entire program. Oh my god. So yeah, so that's something I'm very proud of. I'm one of

the very few women that has completed that program. When I completed that was when I was really, I gained respect in my industry and my community. And at that point, that's when people started listening to me and saying, Oh, okay, maybe she has something to say. And there is value in what she's talking about. And now teaching because I teach it as well. Should you choose, you too can sign up for her easily accessible online courses, such as everything you ever wanted to know about embalming, but we're afraid to ask Midnight Madness and Prep Room Tour, progressive deserology for the modern embalmer and the toughest subjects like embalming the infant death, which next time you're having a challenging day at work, just think what deserologists are going through quietly

behind the scenes of funeral homes all over the world. But actually, it's what is happening, I guess, backstage in the VIP area on stainless steel slabs. And this is a stupid question, but a lot of us do not know how to embalm someone. Can you run through kind of in a nutshell, because I think so many people are, it's such a mystery. Right. It is. What happens? What happens? Right. What happens after Monica gets the call? Yeah, absolutely. And I think it's not just some people, I would say like 99.99% of people do not understand what I do for a living. So they know that I work around dead bodies, but they don't really understand the process. So embalming is comprised of three basic steps. The first part is disinfection of the body, which is very relevant

in our world right now with the pandemic. That's the first step. The second step is preservation of the tissues and the body itself. And the third step is restoration, which is the makeup part, that is the cosmetology part. So there's three steps. Yeah, very simply put. And those postmortem rituals and procedures have been happening for thousands of years, including mummification and other ways of preserving bodies. But injecting via arteries started in about the 1300s, but it really gained popularity in the US during the Civil War when fallen Union soldiers needed to be preserved for shipment home to be seen and then buried by their families. But back then, though, they used arsenic. They don't anymore. But once again, the whole embalming

process is more than just a pitcher of fluids displacing blood. So let's break down those three steps further. There's disinfection, preservation, and restoration. The actual embalming process itself is bathing. That's the disinfection process. We bathe the body, we disinfect the body with the appropriate disinfectants that we use to clear off all of the bacteria, the microbes, anything that's going to harm the embalmer or the family. We get rid of all that stuff, it goes down the drain. And then we move forward into the preservation portion, which is where we actually are, we're trying to remove the bacteria rich blood from the body and replace it with a disinfected based preservative. And then I see the disinfectant

knocks it out in a minute, one minute. And is there a way we can do something like that by injection inside or or? It's not bleach, though, or arsenic anymore. So what is the disinfection based magic potion? Which is formaldehyde. That's the most, I guess, I would say the chemical that we have found so far that works the best for that process. Mm hmm. So if we can get the blood out and replace it with that chemical formaldehyde, then the body is preserved and able to basically buys us time, right, between the decomposition process and going back to dust. So that's the process, the blood goes down the drain, all of the fluids that come out of the body go down the drain. A lot of people are

really surprised to hear that, but that's that's what happens. So they're worried about contaminants, right? Like, Oh, my God, all this stuff's going down the drain. And the one thing I want to say to all those people is they remember that we're working with disinfectants. Okay. So yes, it's going down the drain, but it's also it's disinfecting as it's going to drain. Yeah. So, you know, formaldehyde, once it comes in contact with protein, which is blood and, you know, everything that our body produces, it's returning to its organic state. So as far as like fear of contaminants and contaminating our soils and our water supply and all that, that's false. So that's a misconception that a lot of people have. Okay, quick aside, what else is in in balming fluid? Well, it's a cocktail,

if you will, of formaldehyde, methanol, ethanol and other solvents and wedding agents. And in the prep room, it's stored in something that looks kind of like if you had a frozen margarita machine. And each human person needs about two to three gallons of it flushed into and filling up their blood tunnels. But let's chat about formaldehyde. It's a naturally occurring compound. It's CH2O. It's all over the earth. We even produce some of it naturally in our bodies. And in its pure form, it's an invisible gas. And it has a smell that's been described as sweetly antiseptic, musty, and even pickle like. But if it's in a solution, typically it's in the form of formalin. And it's used in a ton of industrial settings, especially in making resins and particle boards,

but also in keratin hair treatments, like Brazilian blowouts, which I have had many, and I've been handed a rubber respirator at the salon, which is concerning, yet I continue to do it, despite formaldehyde being technically listed as carcinogenic. So folks who work with it are often at a greater risk for certain types of nasopharyngeal cancers and blood cancers and other irritations. But it certainly gets the job done when it comes to particle boards, glossy hair, and good looking dead people. And then finally, the third part, the restoration part, the makeup part, that's the beautification and rejuvenation portion that that's the part that the family gets to see at the end. Notice the lifelike pigmentation.

And not to bash any guys. They don't want to do that. I learned from mostly men, but I feel like women have a lot to bring. We have a lot to bring to the table in that, in that portion, because we are typically, as far as gender roles have been concerned for all this time, you know, we've been kind of pushed into that like, oh, you need to wear makeup and you that all of the marketing is like, oh, buy makeup and wear makeup and do your nails and do your hair. So, you know, we already have this preconceived notion of what beauty looks like. Yeah, right. And it's a little different for I think men and women. So, this whole time in a male-dominated field, is there like a 65-year-old embalmer doing

makeup on, you know, like a 19-year-old deceased patient? Absolutely. That's the standard right now. That's so weird. Yeah. And I'm sorry for this frank reaction, but I'm just saying, imagine a 19-year-old chick walking into Sephora and getting a makeover by someone who doesn't really like or wear makeup themselves. It's maybe a little weird, but it would be super weird if you looked around and everyone who worked at Sephora was also like that guy. You might be like, what's keeping ladies from

doing this job? It's not weird because I'm sure Harold is good at it, but it's also like for that to be a male-dominated activity seems so odd to think about. It is. It is. And I think that's honestly, and like I said, I don't want to bash any men or any of the people that have come before me, but I feel like that's why cremation has gotten this huge rise and acclimation is like this big thing right now because people got sick of like, they got sick of that, you know? They got sick of people that weren't, they're paying all this money for the service and the skill set wasn't there. And a lot of the families were like, I can do a better job on my mom's makeup.

Mm-hmm. So, like I said, I don't want to disparage anyone's skill set or, you know, their background or their history or whatever. But I think, you know, things are changing and, you know, like anything else, any kind of consumer product or service out there, like you need to know who to go to. Yeah. You need to know who to call. Like, you know, you know, what hairstylist you want to go to, you know, where you go to get your nails done. And when someone passes, like that's part of it, you know, you need to know who to go to. What's their skill set? What do they specialize in? Who's the person in the back room? Right.

Right. And do you feel like in the work that you're doing, do you feel like you're serving the family and the friends and the loved ones of the person who's passed? Or do you feel like you're doing it for the person on the table? That's a really great question. And I'm so glad that you asked that. For me personally, I feel like I am doing my work for the family and the friends and the loved ones and the people that need that opportunity to say goodbye. The person on the table is, it's not necessarily for them, right? Basically, what I'm trying to do is to preserve their dignity. And that may have been lost through cancer or a traumatic car accident, a murder, whatever. So that part, yes, I am doing it for that person on the table. Absolutely.

But in the big picture, everything that I do and, you know, especially for those really difficult cases, I don't focus on that person on the table. I focus mentally, emotionally on the family. Like I have to do whatever I need to do to help this family. So that's how I separate that. You know, you have to separate your emotion when you're working, especially on a traumatic case or a baby. Oh, I bet. What types, when you say a difficult case or a traumatic case, what kind of cases come to you? Or what's been a challenge that you really weren't sure you could get through that you ended up really serving the family well for? Well, there's so many. I mean, there's just so many ways that people die, right? Cancer can be traumatic for people. It can be a traumatic

process, but also a suicide, gunshot wounds, hangings, overdoses. You know, that's a really difficult process. It ravages the body. But then there's also infants and bodies that are decomposed. They're found. You know, so there's a lot of different types of scenarios. And we deal with, as embalmers, we deal with the worst of the worst, right? So you don't get to pick and choose and say, well, I'm only going to work on little old ladies that died of natural causes. Yeah. You know, I'm from a Catholic family. And so we, for some reason, Catholics love an open casket. Have there ever been cases where the family has wanted to say goodbye visually and it's something that maybe you wouldn't advise? I personally recommend, I always recommend for

families to view their loved one, even if the trauma is severe. And it might not necessarily be for, you know, 200 people, but for those people that were closest to that person, a lot of times those cases in particular where there is severe trauma are the ones where the families need to say goodbye. They need to be able to accept what has happened. Because a lot of times it's a shock, you know, they go to work in the morning and they don't come home. Yeah. I see death differently in that way where I think, especially here in America, we're so focused on looks, right? It's all about the way you look. And we're so focused on that. It's hard for people to understand that it's not about that. When you have that one last opportunity to say goodbye, like, that's it.

That's all you have, that one last opportunity. For example, if you knew that you were never going to get to see your mom again, she was like, oh, no, you can't come over because my hair is a mess and my house is trashed and whatever. Like, can we, no, it's not about that. It's like, this is your last chance. For most people, I think they don't care. They just want to be able to say goodbye. They're like, you know what, I don't care what she looks like or whatever. I just want to be able to put my hand on her hand and say goodbye. Say what I need to say, right? So I'm a big advocate for viewing before cremation or burial or whatever it is. I think it's extremely important for the the grief process and that journey. And I figured there must be folks out there grieving. It's been

a tough year and we all will grieve at some point. So I looked up some coping advice from the American Psychological Association and they cited some research that most people can recover from loss on their own through the passage of time if they have social support and healthy habits. But also, they stress that there's no normal time period for someone to grieve. It's really individual. But one thing that was reassuring was they said that research tells us that it can also be the catalyst for a renewed sense of meaning that offers purpose and direction to life. They say it can really help to talk with friends or colleagues about your grief and isolation or avoidance of your support systems can disrupt and really delay healing. So talk. It's okay to talk

and remember the person. Also, feel your feelings and allow them, even if it's a range of emotions from anger to sadness. Also, take care of yourself. Get sleep and eat well. Get some exercise if you can. They say it also might help to reach out to other people grieving the same person as helping someone else can get you through the grieving process too. And to remember and celebrate the life of the deceased. Take the chance to remember milestones in their lives, birthdays, anniversaries, even after they're gone. And you may also want to seek out a counselor to help you chat about and process what you're going through. And though it may be very individual, Monica says that a visitation can help with accepting and processing the loss she has found.

Is that possible with COVID patients? And do you get a lot of COVID patients? Absolutely. So, and you know, this has been something that hasn't, it's so new and people don't understand it. But so you have to remember, go back to what I was talking about and those three steps to the embalming process. The first and most important step is disinfection. So by disinfecting the body, we're completely eradicating any of that virus that's intact or active or whatever, right? So it's actually more dangerous to have unembalmed bodies laying around than embalmed bodies when it comes to COVID. In my personal opinion, the families can absolutely see their loved one who has been embalmed. Absolutely. Now, touching and kissing and all

that, I wouldn't recommend. Just like now, you wear a mask and all that. But for families, your loved one dies of COVID. Absolutely, you can see your loved one. And I would recommend embalming for those cases specifically. If you have a loved one that has died of COVID, embalming, I would say, yes, please do that. Because if, like I said, if you're going to let that infection fester and whatever, there's more of a chance that there may be spread or the people that are working on the body may be affected. The embalmers themselves, the funeral directors, the transporters. So yes, they are difficult cases, absolutely. But we deal with many difficult cases like that. So you have to remember, as embalmers, we're the most prepared for these

types of cases than really anyone else. So I deal with MRSA cases, I deal with all types of infectious diseases, not just COVID. Diseases that I'm way more afraid of than COVID, to be honest. And you've never caught anything from? I haven't, but I also, I'm an advocate for using personal protection equipment. So I'm one of the few embalmers, I think that's really public, that has been using a full face respirator for years. I've been using one for years, and I teach that in my embalming classes for my students as well. Monika for a visual has high cheekbones and eyebrows arched kind of like a 50s pinup. One side of her black hair is shaved at the temple, and she's usually working in hot pink scrubs

or a lab coat with her skull and crossbones company logo embroidered in fuchsia. And her smile is under there, but it's obscured by the full face respirator. She usually wears a clear face shield as well, but she's more stylish draining fluids than I am right now as I'm recording this, I promise. I wear scrubs and I wear appropriate attire and the gowns and gloves and all that. So I feel very prepared to deal with any of the infectious and blood-worn pathogens. Has your work changed the way that you look at your own life or living in the moment or mortality or postmortem plans? Oh yeah, totally. Absolutely. Oh for sure. I try to hold grudges so much anymore. That's a good one. Yeah, I try to live for today. Honestly, I really do. I say

I love you to pretty much everyone because I never want to have that be the last call, and I didn't say I love you to my friends and the people that I really do care about. And I try not to get too wrapped up in the things that really, in the big picture, that aren't important. So yeah, I'm also not as... What's the word? I think people get wrapped up with material things and buying this and buying that, and I value my friendships and my family a lot more than that kind of stuff. Yeah, the old, you can't take it with you type of thing. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. Can I ask you listener questions? Oh yeah, let's do it. Okay, but first, a little break to hear about sponsors of the show giving you some deals,

which lets us donate to a charity of theologist choosing. And this week, Easy Peasy, Monica Uptop mentioned her scholarship fund, which is called High Precious, which she established to help break down social, racial, and political barriers and offer female and transgender individuals the opportunity to gain advanced technical training and management skills in funeral service. And she named it High Precious because that is how one misogynist troll patronizingly greeted her on the internet. So she reclaimed it, and she called the whole thing High Precious, which I love. So yes, a donation will be made to High Precious, and do check out the link in the show notes to find out more about it. And it was made possible by the following sponsors.

Okay, now on to your dark and sunny and curious questions. Yeah, I let them know you're coming on the show. Oh, great. So they submitted like hundreds of questions and I've boiled them down. Awesome. So Melanie Baker, Jessica Morgan, Emily Tutorace, Amy Meager, Grace Robichet, Lynn and Dory, Jennifer Lowe, a lot of them all had questions about the type of makeup that you use and they want to know if you use your own makeup or if you use makeup that belong to the deceased. Are there different like specific brands if you're working with a corpse? So yeah, what do you use? What's in your kit? Yeah, okay. So everybody wants to know that. So every case is different for those that are listening. Every case is different. And I do always ask for the family

to bring that person's makeup in because that is super helpful. Like, you know, if you're a woman that wears makeup, you know, it's like that a lot, a lot of women's lifeline, right? So yes, absolutely. I asked for people to bring in the person's makeup. However, dead bodies, we use a makeup that is non-thermogenic. And that's what works best on dead bodies. There is no heat being produced by the body. So a lot of the makeups that we use as women in our everyday lives, don't really have the same reaction. So what I try to do is I use my non-thermogenic makeups. Right now, I've started to use a product by Lola7. So Lady, she's a funeral director and a bomber. She's created her own makeup line. And it's absolutely fabulous. I've never used it.

I'm not just plugging her. Like, I have never used a makeup like that because it actually smells really, really beautiful. She's done a really nice job. So I do use Lola7 for some very difficult coverage issues when there's bruising or postmortem staining. Postmortem staining, I just looked it up, aka liver mortis or blue death, is when blood pools in parts of the body and leaves a dark, mottled purple splash under the skin. I want to come make sure that clients on her table get the good stuff to cover it up because drugstores at concealer, get out of here. You're not going to do the job. And then I also use my traditional mortuary pigments that our old school chemical companies make. Dodge Company is known for their

cosmetics line. And I use theirs quite a bit as a base. And I also use a product called Necrometics and PMRC. So those are kind of like special effects makeup to cover any kind of major like camouflage. I also use an airbrush when it's needed. And the airbrush I don't use for like bridal makeup, I use that for like really severe cases, traumatic cases where I need out good coverage. So what I try to do is I use my mortuary makeup to create a foundation for a lifelike appearance. So I basically I'm just bringing them up to an appearance of like maybe when they got out of the shower, and they're getting ready to put their makeup on. So fresh and so clean. And then after that is when I take their makeup bag

out. And then I work my magic with their makeup. Oh, do you ever have to ask the family like of these lips? How do you know if someone would want a bold lip for their goodbye or like a peachy nude? Exactly. So what I try to do is when I sit down with the family, I ask them for pictures. And I say, find a picture that you really like your moms, your sisters, your brother, whoever, how you really like their makeup. And you bring me that picture. And I'm going to try and recreate that. So if you want your mom's hair to look this certain way, but her makeup to look another way, then I need two different pictures. Right. So and families are pretty good about it. They usually bring in one picture. And they're like, you know, this was like my brother's wedding or something.

And my mom absolutely loved the way that the makeup artist did her makeup. Or this is how my mom always wore her makeup. Can you do it like this? And that's what I try to accomplish. Kyla Kelly and Naomi Tassin both wanted to know if family members ever request to do their makeup. And if that's something that even even happens. Yeah. So there are a lot of family members that do want to participate. And I actually teach a class. It's called the Family Assisted Dress Experience. And I teach other funeral directors how to engage families so that the family can be a part of that process. Started teaching that class in 2015. And basically it teaches the funeral director how to guide the family so that the family can do

the hair and the makeup and the nails and even dress their loved one. So, but that's a service like you pay for that. You know, you pay your funeral director for that service. So, but yes, absolutely families can be a part of that and dress their loved one and do the makeup and all that. The one thing I would recommend is that, you know, they ask that the funeral director embalmer to help them through that process because it's not only technically can be difficult with discoloration after death and the condition of the skin after death. That can be difficult. And an embalmer is trained on that, you know, on how to work with those challenges, but also emotionally. Like you think you can do it and then you get in there and you're like,

oh man, I don't know if I can do this. Yeah. So that's why I'm going to go back to like finding the right professional, finding the right funeral home and funeral director, just like you would find a dentist or a doctor or a hairstylist and have them in your back pocket. Like, you know, already this is the person who is going to take care of my family or, you know, my loved one. It's hard to think about. It really is. But when you're going through it, you don't want to be having to make those decisions at that time. So read some yelp pages, ask your most goth friends, or maybe the people in your life who like voted early and have an earthquake kit and just generally have their shit together. Have you ever had anyone interview you while they're still alive?

What do you mean? Like say, hey, things aren't looking so great. Oh, yes. You to do like for like for pre arrangements and whatnot. Absolutely. So like many people don't realize that funeral directors often do pre arrangements. And so you can pre arrange your funeral with your funeral director. So absolutely. I have families that come in and talk to me and say, Hey, Monica, I want to plan everything now so that you know exactly what to do when I die. And you're like, I looked amazing here. I'd like a smoky eye. Absolutely. And they choose everything they can choose their casket or whether they want to shroud or if they, you know, they want a bronze casket or if they want to be cremated and like we do everything we all the details you

pick the earn. Say you don't want a funeral hearse. Say I want to be in a horse drawn carriage. Oh, fancy, fancy. So we can plan all that in advance. You can even pay for it in advance too with like funeral insurance. A lot of people don't know that. But the one thing I would say is that you don't have to pay to do funeral arrangements. And a lot of people have that misconception that they have to pay for their funeral if they go and talk to a funeral director about that. And that's not true. Oh, you can. Yeah. Yeah, you can go in and you may and funeral directors love that because then it's it's just so much like they already know what to do. Yeah, they already know they pull your file. And this is what, you know, Shelly wants and she we already talked about it

her signatures right here that takes the pressure off the family. They don't have to make decisions. All they have to do is pay. Just yeah, just pick up the tab preordered it. Yep. Yep, ordering. It's like ordering Indian food. Yeah, he chose everything. Just pick up the tab. Yeah, you can even do it online. I have colleagues that do it online now. So families don't even have to go in the funeral home. Oh my gosh, yeah. So smart. I mean, on that note, I got so many questions from so many amazing listeners. Jacob Blizzard, first time question asked her, Have you ever prepared a full clown in makeup? Jeffrey Bradshaw wants to know if anyone ever asked to be made up as a character? This one question. JV Hampton von Sant wants to know if I

wanted to say be buried looking like a dolly part and drag impersonator. Is that a request? Taryn wants to know if they could go out and drag makeup. And I really loved this one question. Shout out to patron Felix Wolfe who asked, Do you try to mimic the makeup style or aesthetic of the deceased as a queer freak? Oh, I would want my makeup to reflect what I wore in my life and not an idea of normal makeup. Felix, I love you. Yeah, is that cool? So it's totally cool. But like I said, you have to find the right funeral director, right? Because so politics play a big deal in everyone's life for everyone is you want to make sure that you're going to somebody who understands like what you want and that they also respect your own views and the way that you

live your lifestyle. So like, for example, my best friend, David, passed away from cancer a few years ago, when they told him you're terminally ill, he came to me and he's like, I want to plan all this out. And so we started doing that. And he was gay, he was a gay man, but he was like not just a gay man, he was like a fabulous gay man. And like everybody knew that his nickname was Barbie. And yeah, so everybody knew how fabulous David was. And I wanted to make sure that he went out just as fabulous as he could. And so we talked about that. And he's like, Monica, he's like, please, oh my God, please do not let me go out without a tan. And because he loved to be tan, and he lived in Florida, and he loved to be tan. And you know, he was like, make sure that

my highlights are on point and please make sure that I have a tan. And so we did that, like I made sure that I gave him a spray tan. And he wanted glitter all around his suit, he had a white suit that he picked out and this like beautiful bright colored shirt, I made sure he had glitter on the flower, I made him a flower corsage and it had like glitter on it and made sure that his highlights were like, I'm fine. Yes, if you want to look like Dolly Parton, you can do that, but you need to call Monica, you need to call me, you know, you need to find a funeral director really though, you need to find a funeral director that understands that and that they can offer you that service that you want. So it just takes a little bit of legwork, but absolutely it can be done if you want

to look like a cartoon character, if you want to go out in cosplay or whatever, like, yes, you can do that. But you need to first of all, you need to express that to your family and make sure that your family understands you need to have it in writing and you need to find a funeral director that's going to honor your wishes and that has the skills to do that because, you know, not everybody can do drag makeup. It's not easy. You're born naked and the rest is drag. So no. Yeah, it's not easy. So you want to make sure that you have the right people in place, if that really truly is your wish, you need to put it in writing, make sure that you have the right professionals in place and that your family fully understands your requests. Absolutely. Several people. Tammy

Fortin, Molly Rose K. Sebert, Heidi Stushinoff and Elaine Lemarande, who's a first time question asker, wants to know HBO series Six Feet Under, did they get it right? Was it flim flam? Why do people have to die? To make life important. Heidi wants to know if you ever imagine having full-on conversations with the deceased or Tammy wants to know if do you ever just talk to the person while you're doing them up, either out louder in your head? Yeah, so those are all like really common questions that I get. First of all, I'm sorry to disappoint you all. I never watched Six Feet Under. Sorry, I just don't, I don't watch shows like that. I'm like a super nerd. Like I watch like really like, like documentaries on like the history of food or

something like that. I'm really into nutrition and fitness. So I typically spend time like, you know, watching those kind of shows or like history. So sorry, I don't know if they got it right or not as far as conversations with the dead. Yeah, I do. I do have conversations with them sometimes. My most favorite one would be like, you know, help, help me help you, you know, if I have a body that's, you know, giving me a hard time and I'm not able to like really get the effect that I'm going for. I tell them like, help me help you. Or, you know, sometimes I'll say, you know, we're going to get you where you're going. Like I'm going to help your family through this. And you're going to look beautiful. That's something I always, I do a lot is I'll be like, you're going

to look so great. You're really beautiful. And I don't know if that's more for me, but um, yeah, I do. I have those kind of like little conversations every once in a while, for sure. It's Molly in there. A few people had some questions that I'm sure you get a lot that they're probably afraid to ask, but Molly and Sadie want to know eyeballs. Do you have to close them? Do you have to sew like in lips? Karen wanted to know this. Do you have to close the lips or the eyes? How does that work? Yeah. Okay. So that's super technical and a lot of people are weirded out by that kind of stuff. But so sometimes I'll get a body in and their eyes are already closed and their mouth is closed. And so I don't really have to do anything. 90% of the

time we do have to close the people's eyes and we do have to close their mouth. And so there is a surgical procedure that we do and it's um, it's a suturing procedure and you have to think of it like you're going to the dentist. So a few people get so weirded out about it, but I'm like, you guys, this is plastic surgery on the dead. That's all it is. Okay. So basically it's a surgical procedure where we go in and we suture through the nose, the septum and down into the mouth and close the mouth that way. So you know, obviously we're not using any like painkillers or anything because the person is dead and but yeah. Didn't feel a thing. So I try to like demystify that fear for people or so that they don't have fear and demystify that process by explaining it that way

where it's a surgical procedure much like plastic surgery. The same with the eyes. So sometimes we will use a little tiny bit of adhesive just to keep the inner canthus and the outer canthus like closed. A canthus side note is a corner of the eye. And also I just read that some deserologists might use eye caps under your lids. They look like large plastic contact lenses, but they have spikes on one side to keep the decedents eyes closed like they're in deep sleep. And now the facial features are set before embalming and kind of a restful pleasant expression. Although it has kind of left me wondering if anyone's ever been asked to be presented if they're just like mid afternoon nap with a rumpled shirt and a remote control in one hand,

maybe a pool of drool on a couch cushion under their head. Anyway, sometimes they do dab a little glue to keep you from looking alert. It's not what you want. Not always though. If the embalming process goes very well, you don't have to use any kind of adhesive at all. Oh, yeah. So that tissue will firm in that position, which is what we're really after. Okay. Yeah. I didn't know that. Do people, do they die with an expression on their face? Sometimes. Yeah. Sometimes I'll get somebody in that has a little smirk or something like that. And usually by the time the person has gotten to me at the mortuary, any kind of rigor mortis has gone away. And so they're in a natural, you know, position. And not that this was something I thought

I would ever learn. But there are stages that the body goes through after your spirit flies off into heaven filled with frogs and friendly possums and your grandpa. And all you can eat, lactose free gelato and hammocks. So the first stage after you die is pallor mortis where circulation stops and skin looks lighter and pallid. Then there's algor mortis where the body comes to ambient room temperature just cools off like leftovers. And then rigor mortis in which the muscle's different from a lack of ATP to relax them. And this rigor mortis stage starts about 12 hours after death and lasts a few days. And then the muscles begin to decompose and the body relaxes again. And then there's liver mortis, that purplish staining, which can start as soon

as 20 minutes after death. I also found it very sweet to learn that during embalming, the deserologist or embalmer will massage the body just to keep things flowing. And it's sort of like a final pampering spa day. But you know, like one of the naked spas. But yes, Monica says that by the time she works on them, the limbs and the muscles are pretty flippity floppity chill. Those are not her words. But yeah, people die with their mouth open a lot. I mean, you would relax every muscle relaxes. So, you know, we do kind of like when you're sleeping, you know, sometimes you sleep with your mouth open. It's kind of the same thing. Catch and flies. We've all done it. Yeah. No horrified looks though. I don't really

have recollection of any like horrified expressions. Oh, that's good. Yeah. I was worried about that. I was like, yeah, no, that's not something that that I've seen. And then Wendy Miles and Lulu Hall both wanted to know if there is a smell or if that is even an issue. I guess also you're wearing a mask. So is that a is that a thing? The smells are yes. So that is one thing for sure. That is it's definitely like decomposition has a smell and dead human bodies have a smell, much like when you walk into the hospital. So those smells from the hospital, they do carry over into the mortuary. So there is, you know, the bodily fluids that are produced. Yeah, all of that very clinical hospital smells.

And then that's paired with the the smells of decomposition. I try to explain it to people like if you've ever had a steak in your refrigerator and gone away for the weekend and you come back and you open the refrigerator up and you're like, ooh, that's definitely like there's something bad in there. Smell this. So that smell is kind of like what it's like, but on a grand scale, right? Yeah. So I think it's important also to point out that the embalming process retards that smell. So, you know, that's why it's like, okay, let's get these people a bomb so that we don't have those smells. There's no offensive odor for the family. And to be honest, working, you know, as a professional, like, I don't want to smell

those smells either. They can get a little stinky. Oh, Bubberry had a great question. Is makeup done differently on deceased people of color? Products for darker complexions weren't widely available before the 70s? Yeah, absolutely. So it's totally different. And also, it's important to remember that another fascinating and amazing thing about embalming is that we can cosmetize the deceased person from the inside out. What? It's so cool. It is super cool, especially if you can really as an embalmer, if you can master that technique, it's really neat. So what we do is we add a dye additive to the embalming fluid. And whether that person is Caucasian or black, we have different types of

and colors of dye that we can use. And when it's done right, it is really beautiful, like the person's skin tone is just, it comes out really nice. You can do that. But then also, the cosmetics that we use, if it's topically that we're talking about Lola Seven, like I said, it's very modern type brand of mortuary makeup is actually created by a black lady, she's a black funeral director. And so that was something I think that she brought to the game that was really valuable to me is that she brought different palettes of different complexion types. Cool. Oh, and if you want to look up Lola Seven, the Seven is spelled S-E, numeral seven E-N, and they're on Instagram at Lola Seven Cosmetics. I started poking around

their cosmetic site. And for a sec, I was like, Oh, that's a great coral lip palette. And then I remembered it will hopefully be a very long time before I get to wear it. So yeah, I have all of her palettes and I have so any kind of complexion, whether they're black or Asian or Hispanic or Caucasian, I have all of those different types of foundation colors. Oh, that's great. Yeah. But I do, I do have to say, I do try to cosmetize through internally first, because less is more when it comes to mortuary makeup, in my opinion. And I guess that's also just a good lesson. Like, you know, if you want your skin to look great, well, you're alive. Drink a lot of smoothies. Yeah. Take your vitamins. Hydrate. Exactly. The best, I feel like the best skin cream is just

drinking water. You're absolutely right. I helped you agree with you on that. A few people wanted to know if you've had any really strange requests. Cassie Flint and Ariel Jade asked if you've just had like a really strange request that either caught you off guard or was a challenge. Yeah. So I think the most interesting strange request was I had a young lady who passed away and she was an exotic dancer, obviously, like a young girl, very beautiful. And she didn't really have a family. So her work family was like the people that were taking care of her arrangements. And they wanted to have her prepared in her costume, like her, her dancing costume. So, and I'm fine with that. I mean, I will honor anyone's wishes

within reason, right? But the issue that I had was that, you know, it's so much of her skin that was showing that that's a lot of makeup and a lot, it was a challenge because of the decomposition process and the way that the body, you know, breaks down. A lot of that we can camouflage under clothing as morticians. So, you know, I was like, you guys, I don't know if that's really like, I don't know if that's the best idea. Like that's really, that's a lot of skin, you know, that's going to be showing and her body wasn't in the best condition as it was, as far as the place that she was in the process of decomposition, she wasn't in a great place. However, I wanted to do that for them. I just didn't think it would be the best, like,

last memory for them. And so once I explained it to them, and like, this is going to show, and this is, they're like, oh, yeah, like, yeah, we don't want that. Yeah. You know, so I think just having that open conversation with them, like, this is what's what you're going to see is it makes people's minds up for them when they have that conversation. And they're like, oh, I didn't think about that. Oh, y'all, friends do become family. And this story just socked me right in the guts. So I hope her molecules have fed mushrooms and flowers and worms that feed birds that sing in the sunshine. She deserves it. I want to cry. How did it turn out? What did she end up wearing? Did she end up wearing a dress? Yeah, yeah, we put her in a really pretty, like, shimmery dress.

It was one of her one of her costumes that she had. It just had more coverage. So yeah, yeah, she she ended up looking really pretty on her special day. But I did have a magician one time. Really? That was kind of cool. Yeah. And it was a funeral of all magicians. So that was that was kind of cool. And they did a really nice send off for him. They had like his little hat and his little bunny and everything with him. Wait, hold the phone. Did they bury the magician with his bunny? The bunny was alive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. But not buried with him alive. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. But he was there for the service. Oh, yeah, he was he was with him. And he was there for the service. Yeah, absolutely.

Functional support. Yes. Oh my gosh. Did you have to hide a bunch of scarves in his sleeves and all that stuff? Amazing. Yeah, you got to know some like real magic tricks, I'm sure. Oh, it was one of the most memorable funerals that I've had and all the magicians that were there. And like, yeah, it was it was definitely one for the books for sure. What a party. Corinne and Jen Borlick and me handlebars want to know if you've ever had anything spooky or done right? Weird happen? Any unexpected surprises or if you've ever kind of freaked yourself out? Spooky or unexpected surprises. Unexpected surprises would be like last day of service, I've worked my buns off all week trying to get you know, this body prepared and the funeral

running and everything perfect. And then like the day of the service, the family has like no money to pay. So I would say that's probably the one that I'm like, Oh my God, I had to know what. But I would say like I know what people are after and like spooky. I don't really have any of those stories. I just it's not like that. I think people get so caught up in like the movies and what they see on TV that they don't realize it's really like a hospital setting. It's like a hospital setting. And so it's very clinical and we have our cooler. Yes, there's, you know, bodies in our cooler, but I'm so busy that I don't have really time to think about like spooky stuff. I think people think that we have one body and and that's it. When we in reality, we probably have like

we're processing between five and 20 bodies at a time. And are you going from one to the other, like depending on stages and stuff? Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. So yeah, I know I wish I had some spooky stories. I wish I had like, I wish I had like, Oh yeah, this one time, like this guy like sat up and he started talking to me or, you know, but it's just not. It's just not. That's good. I think that's good. I think that helps people. So I guess don't be afraid of funeral homes are dead people. Dead people who are literally chilling in fridges right now, we're probably afraid of dead people while they were alive. And they're just someone's cousin or girlfriend or mom or coworker or mailman. And they all had birthdays

and got excited about donuts in the break room and had favorite songs and a smell that reminded them of a first love. So Monica is there to make sure that they look amazing at the last party they'll ever host kind of a bon voyage to the great beyond. But it can't all be smooth sailing for her. And the last questions I always ask, what is one thing about your job that is the hardest or something that's annoying or petty? What's one thing that you you hate? So my one thing I would say that's really it's hard for me is that the misconceptions about embalming what it is and why we do it and why, you know, there's a lot of I want to really, truly drive this home to your listeners is that there's a lot of propaganda on the internet right now about like embalming is

bad for the environment and it's bad for this and bad for that. And it's not the people stop listening to embalming advice from people who don't involve, you're not going to listen to you like take advice from a hairstylist and when you're trying to get a root canal done. So a lot of that is just it gets under my skin is that there's a lot of misconceptions about the embalming process itself gets under her skin. That's dad worthy right there. Bravo. So just be careful with what you are listening to on like YouTube and podcast and people that are a lot of like the natural burial advocates and stuff like that, which I love natural burial, no offense to natural burial. I absolutely love it. I think it's beautiful, amazing way to say goodbye.

Absolutely. Just be careful about what you're listening to. And of course, just dad were jumping in to say that opinions really differ on this topic as you can imagine. Plenty of websites say that embalming fluid is a disgrace to our poo filled sewage systems. But I did find a 2011 paper from the University of Johannesburg titled the effect of formaldehyde use in sanitation, which stated formaldehyde does not raise any serious human health or environmental concerns provided it is properly handled and stored. When released into the air, the paper said it is rapidly broken down by a photolysis light. And when released into water, it's biodegraded within a few days. So this paper went on then to discuss porta potties.

Essentially, the formaldehyde breaks down into carbon dioxide and water through the natural action of oxygen and sunlight and bacteria and heat. So good for poo. Good for you. That is not the slogan of the formaldehyde commission, nor should it be. But if you're going to get truly pissed about formaldehyde and industry, essentially, maybe get bent about resins and particle board first and then embalming a distant second. But if you're like, I want a natural burial, I want to return to the earth ASAP, I get it. I feel you completely as for natural burials, you can get encased in the fetal position into a big fibrous egg that will feed your loamy nutrients into a tree. Or you can return to our mother by donning a mushroom

suit that breaks you down to grow strains of fungus. Perhaps a body farm donation is for you? Or you can get tossed into a vat of concrete and thrown in the ocean to help a coral reef develop. It's your bod, do what makes you happy. Just maybe let someone know what those wishes are. You can do it in a fun way. You can write a poem or a singing telegram, tweet it. You're asking me what I want? Yeah, it's your funeral. What about the thing that you just love the most about your career, your job? The thing that I love most about my career and my job is that hands down, I get to help people that are living in their darkest days. So I get to connect with people on a level that

other people will never, even their closest friends and family, do not get to connect with them. So I really love the fact that years after I'll have families that will reach out to me and they remember every detail of the time that we spent together, you know, planning the service and the things that I did for their loved one. I just truly love connecting with people like that. Yeah, you have to really be a people person to work with the dead, huh? I think so. I think you have to have that definite, like you have to have compassion and you have to be able to be strong and the family's counting on you to get them through that really horrible time in their life. So yeah, I do. I really, that's my favorite part of it.

Oh, that's a beautiful thing. That's really great. And you're so respected in your field. You're just like the person to ask about this. I was so excited to talk to you. I love that. Well, I'm so glad to get some of your time. I know, unfortunately, it's busy season for you. Yes, it is. So because it is, it is a busy, fast-moving kind of pace here and we're going into our busy season as far as death is concerned, I have for your listeners or anybody else, I have a link set up on my website for the general public and I do teach classes as well for the general public. So all these questions that your listeners are asking, they might want to take a class that I offer and they can engage with me and other

people that are interested in the macabre and learning about death in a comfortable environment. Awesome. Oh, this was asked by patrons and mortuary students Kayla Simpson and Kyra Dye. Hello, wonderful death workers. Thank you for taking care of the people that we love. Oh, a few people who are in mortuary school asked if you have one piece of advice for someone going down this path, if you could give to yourself in the past or someone else starting out. Any one last piece of advice? Somebody that's going into the industry is to really thicken your skin right up. Yeah. Thicken your skin up and, you know, don't let anybody tell you that you can't achieve your dreams, like you go after it. Whatever your dreams are, don't let anybody squish them.

Don't let anyone squish them. Don't let anyone... T-shirts. Don't let anyone squish them. Like, yeah. Don't let anybody get in your way. Well, thank you so, so much. Keep up the amazing work for those families and make sure to get some rest in between if you can. It's been fun, Ellie. Thanks for having me. Thanks for reaching out. And I guess until, until next time, happy and balmy. So ask smart people stupid questions. And whether you want to dance or wear glitter or embalm people or write a novel, follow your dreams. Don't let anyone squish them. To learn more about Monica and her classes, services, even embalming uniforms, you can check

out her website and next gen mortuary support. Link is in the show notes. You can follow her on Instagram and on Twitter at coldhandshosts. All those links are in the show notes alongside one to donate to High Precious, should you desire. We are at oligies on Twitter and Instagram. I'm Ali Ward, just one L on both. Do say hello. If you'd like oligies masks or beanies or t-shirts or hoodies, head up oligiesmerch.com. Thank you to merchmavens. Shannon Feltis and Bonnie Dutch. They also host a comedy podcast called You Are That that has amazing guests. So check them out. If you'd like to submit questions for future episodes, you can join Patreon for as little as 25 cents an episode. And that is patreon.com slash oligies. Thank you to Aaron Talbert who

admins the oligies podcast Facebook group. Thank you to professional transcriptionist Emily White who leads the effort with all the volunteer transcribers. Transcripts are free and available to everyone at alleyward.com slash oligies extras alongside bleeped episodes for kiddos. Those are bleeped by Caleb Patton. Noelle Dilworth helps me schedule interviews because I'm just frankly very bad at that. Jarrett Sleeper is the assistant editor who also went to the store and got me ice cream sandwiches the other day and thus shall be canonized into sainthood. A huge thanks of course to the thread that sutures all these pieces together, Stephen Ray Morris. He also hosts the Percast and See Jurassic Right to great podcasts about kiddies

and dinos. Nick Thorburn of the band Islands wrote and performed the theme song. And if you listen to the end I divulge something. Oh and this week I got a new watch that tracks your heart rate and y'all know I have anxiety but I try to control it with diet and medication but out of the blue last week I started to have an anxiety attack and I was like one of these I'm used to them. Later I looked at my watch and my heart rate went from resting at maybe 55 beats a minute to 160. It just jumped from one minute to the next doing nothing. How weird is that? But it's actually really nice and affirming to know that anxiety isn't just me being a weenie who worries about things that it's like a chemical somatic thing. And so to take care of our minds we got to take

care of our bods also while they still have blood pumping through them so I've been trying to chill out a little bit more. Life is short. Let's breathe. Relax. Just live it minute to minute. Appreciate the people you love. Also leave a will and some instructions on what kind of funeral you want. Also one more thing for some reason the album that I work the most to is Miss Anthropocene by Grimes. I don't know why. Anyway right as I was finishing some research on embalming Spotify shuffled in a grime song called Flesh Without Blood. Ooh spooky. Some real ghost in the machine right there. Anyway that concludes 2020 Spooktober. Also I might just re-air pumpkins as a palate cleanser as well this week. So if I do go listen to pumpkins too. Get a pumpkin. Live your life.

You deserve it. Bye bye. you