On Display with Melissa Gorga - Scrambled or Sunny Side Up? (w/ Loren Ridinger)

Episode Date: February 13, 2025

Melissa invites celebrity best-friend, CEO, and author, Loren Ridinger, onto the show to share her heartbreaking story of losing the love of her life, the very powerful way that she views grief, and her incredible advice to anyone who has dealt with the loss of a partner.   Loren’s amazing story of grief and growth is all in her brand-new book, Scrambled or Sunny-Side Up?: Living Your Best Life after Losing Your Greatest Love, available now.   This week’s sponsors: Apartments.com - The Place to Find a Place: www.Apartments.com Belle Vitale – Improve Hormone Health and Well-Being: https://bit.ly/3Elkro4 or www.BelleVitale.com , promo code: BV15 (15% off)  Dime Beauty - Clean, Luxurious, Affordable Skincare: www.DimeBeautyCo.com Prolon - Fasting with Food: www.Prolonlife.com/OnDisplay (15% off + $40 Bonus Gift)  Pluto.TV - Streaming TV: www.Pluto.TV (Free) Rula – Quality Therapists Who Specialize in You: www.rula.com/Melissa (Patients typically pay $15 per session)

This is how he functioned. That's how he loved. And I'm grateful for it. When I think about it today, I think about what a beautiful love story to care that much about somebody's opinion. What's up, guys? Welcome to another episode of On Display. I missed you guys so much this week.

I hope you had an amazing weekend. Guys, you need to get ready for this episode because it's going to be a great one. My guest today has an incredible story to share. She's a powerhouse entrepreneur and a true inspiration for women everywhere. You might know her as the CEO of market America and shop.com. And today we're going to catch up and hear all about her brand new book scrambled or sunny side up that just came out this week. Ladies and gentlemen, a very amazing great friend to me, the one and only Lauren

Reidinger. I love you. I am so happy to do this with you. I missed you. You look stunning. Thank you. So do you virtually hugging you all over the screen. I love you. I love you too. You know, for my listeners out there, this woman is one of my favorite people in the world. Like you really are you. You are you're just like that. And I'll take so my listeners know my family, right? They know my sisters. They know my mother.

They know. And Lauren reminds me of family. Like, right Lauren, from the second we met. We did it off the moment we met. That was it. Like the moment we met, we were connected for life. We saw each other in the Hamptons and that was it. We went right to each other. And I don't even think we were apart that whole day and night.

No. And we've been together ever since. And it's like whenever we see each other, it's no time's past. We keep up with each other all the time. And I love you. We had dinner recently in New York. I was so happy to see you and Joe. And you know how much I think of you guys and how much I love one of America's favorite couples. Oh, thank you. Just, you know, and Joe and your husband hit it off. Amazingly as well. We all just like clicked and that was it. You guys came to Florida, you stayed with us. We

laughed. We did tik tok dances. We did it all. I know. But what we stayed on the boat, your magnificent boat, let's call it a yacht. We stayed on that yacht. And what amazing, like I think we were there for like five days and it was so amazing. To welcome us in like that and just have you have like the most amazing presence at that. First of all, you have a great house in Miami, an amazing house in Miami. Your house in Connecticut is the chicest, most amazing, like it's the decor for me there. Like I die at the decor. It is the decor. It's beautiful. And the grounds. I love the grounds. I love

a good yard. I love a good yard. I visualize kids running everywhere. I love that. You know how I am. Yes. You're just like, this is a family woman, guys. Like she, this is why she's my type. She's just like, you know, part of the family. And you know what else you are? You're so like relatable. You're very warm. You listen. I feel like there's been times when I was even like, you know, and I've shown this on the show,

so nobody come at me, but like Joe and I would be like, at like a, you know, we were arguing a little bit more than we do now or whatever. And I would tell Lauren, I was like, I remember being drunk at your house one day. That was the best night of all. We, those are the best nights. I love your transparency. We all,

anybody who thinks that being married is easy is confused. It's not, it is not supposed to be all sunshine and rainbows. It is nobody gives you got to get a manual to get a driver's license, take a test. You got to do all these things in life to progress to different levels, but marriage, nobody gives us a manual. 1000%, it's so true. It's really learning the process. It's really trying to communicate and understand each other.

There will be times that you want to kill each other. A thousand percent. And we have had those times in life. Yes, we did. We've had those times. I think you picked me up a couple of times. I picked you up a couple of times. We had fun doing it. And it's real. And I think that's why, when you're honest about the way relationships are and transparent about it, people then understand. Because everybody's always hiding it. We were talking about motherhood just recently, a friend of mine, and we were talking about

how motherhood is such a beautiful thing, but our children don't fill our cup. It's not their job. To fill our cup. Yeah, it's not. It's kind of a weird thing. You are correct on that. And then eventually they get up and they live their own life and they have to go do what

they have to do so your cup's going to be empty. Bye bye, mama. You know what I mean? Bye bye, mama. And you know, and it's not even that we get joy out of doing things for them, but it's never like, mom, thank you so much for doing all you do for me. Mom, good sacrifice. Did you know I starved for you? I slept on Mom, good sacrifice. Did you know I starved for you?

I slept on the floor for you. Did you know I went without food? They don't see that. And by the way, it's not their job to. And when you understand that as a parent going in, it gets easier. 1000%. I couldn't even explain it any better,

especially going through, just like having teenagers now, because I'm starting to, they're already like half out the door or whatever that is. And I'm like, wait a second. No one appreciates, like they don't say that. I know they do appreciate it, but they're not like talented. Of course. We're not saying that they don't appreciate or they don't love us. Of course they do. But it's like, you know, the people- They're not reminding us every day. Not the people who built the great cathedrals. They don't know, we don't know who they are either. They're not reminding us every day. Not the people who built the great cathedrals. We don't know who they are either.

Exactly. I can agree more. So true. I love Amber. You have the most amazing daughter. How's Amber? How are your little grand babies? She's so good.

They're all actually on their way to seeing me. I'm so excited. I haven't seen them in a few weeks. Yeah, and that's the thing. Amber's awesome, but even through all this healing I've tried to do over the last couple of years, you realize your kids have their own life. Your grandchildren have now gotten older. I'm like, Hey, do you want to come over and play? And they're like, well, Mimi, we have a sleepover. We have friends, we have this.

And you realize that it's not their role to take care of us in that capacity. And that's a good thing. We wouldn't want that. Right. It's not like you're, and we're going to talk all about this book and all about your healing process and just what you're going through and what you've been through and how you kind of come out on the other side. I just want to give people a really good rundown of really who you are and what you are like. So can we just talk about how you're I feel like you're an incredible motivational speaker as well. I mean, you are I've seen you live in action. They are as well stand on a stage in front of 1000 and thousands of like your coworkers almost like

people that work with you. Our salespeople, yeah. Yes. And give the most inspiring, amazing speeches that, you know, and I showed up to that as well and I've come to love you. You sure did. And it's pretty powerful. Like when did you become someone like, How do you know all this, Lauren?

It's funny, I didn't. I was 18 when I met JR. He was 36, 18 years older than me. He talked about in 92, one day people were going to shop online and through the computer and that seemed preposterous because nobody had computers back then. And I would be like, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, of. Of course. You know, but women like to try on their makeup. And women like to try on their shoes and see the jeans on in person. He's like, yeah, but that's going to change.

And he had a great vision. And so we would go around the country talking about this in 92, like, you can be able to shop from the mall without walls. And I thought, wow, this guy's amazing. But the people in the meeting looked at him like he was nuts. You know, they would say, yeah, right, OK, this guy's amazing. But the people in the meeting looked at him like he was nuts. You know, they would say, yeah, right. Okay, this guy's crazy. And he would leave there and he would say, what a great meeting, huh?

And I'd be like, what? No, they didn't really look at us that way. And he was like, it doesn't matter what they think, Lauren. What matters is what you think. What do you think? Do you believe that we'll do this? Do you believe that we can change the way people shop? Do you believe that we're going to? Do you believe that we can change the way people shop? Do you believe that we're gonna be able to do this

faster than anybody's ever done it? And I was like, yeah. And he goes, okay, well, you do the meeting tomorrow. I was like, oh no, I can't. I'm 18, I've never spoken in front of a group of people. You can't ask me to do that. And he said, you have to. And so I was trying to figure out a way

to break up with him the whole way, just standing in total. I just did not want to be in a situation where I had to get up there and talk in front of a group of people. Especially at 18, you were 18? I was 18. I got up there and I was like, hi everybody, my name is Lauren Ashley. And I just fell to the floor, passed out in front of everybody. I was traumatized. I remember when I woke, everybody was standing over me, fanning over me. And I was like, and he was like, get up. You were great.

They turned the AC off. Anybody would have passed out. You're going to be fantastic tomorrow in Houston. Wow. I really hate this guy, but you know what? He didn't get in the car and he didn't say, you know what? You're right. You're not good at this. Just he didn't say, you know what? You're right. You're not good at this.

Just drive. He said, you're going to be great tomorrow. And even though I wanted to break up with him, I couldn't because I didn't have the money to get home without him. And he didn't have any money to send me home. And I got to Houston and I sucked. You know, I wasn't any better than I was the day before, but I didn't pass out. And I did it every day for years until you know, you're really good at it. And that's that type of

belief, that type of belief. And you realize that that went a long way for me. But a lot of that, you know, Jair was genius at creating concept and ideas of, you know, people would shop one day and instead of spending all of our money and read and advertising, we'll pay these salespeople to promote our products. And we've been doing it for 33 years. It's phenomenal. And it's a monster company for those who don't know. It's a monster. It's a beast. They have created from the ground up one of the most successful. And as a couple, which is, and look at you, you were 18 at the time. And the fact that it has grown into what it is today is beyond, it's beyond inspiring. We still pinch, I mean, I pinch myself. JR always pinched himself. JR was, as you know,

the most normal guy, like, don't forget where you came from. You never find your way back home. Always believed in have, you know, we always said, Lauren, some people collect cars, some people collect art, some people collect jewelry, things we collect people. And you know, we collect- And you do, you do collect people. We have this wide array of diverse group of friends. And I think we all like yourself.

And we have this tight circle where everybody supports each other. Everybody believes in each other. Everybody goes to each other's thing and supports each other. I think there's nothing more beautiful than that. That's why when we go through things that we go through personally, professionally, you can lean on your friends and you know the good ones, you know the bad ones. Life is about relationships. I always say that. Who can you call when you really need them and are they going to answer the phone? Yes, of course.

That's what all that matters. It doesn't matter what time you need them, when you're calling them, whatever it is you're asking. You know, I love that little clip where in a movie I used to tell Ben when Ben and Jen were together, I used to tell Ben, he would say things like that movie clip where he would say, hey, I need your help, gotta do something, can't ask any questions, but it involves

taking care of business with somebody. And it's like, whatever it takes to do it, you just gotta do it. That's the type of thing you gotta do when you got friends. You just ride or die going all the way. Yes, and you have people, and when I tell you guys Lauren has friends, she has friends. I mean, she is friends with so many people that you all know and love. And it's because you're so trustworthy. You have very high profile friends. Obviously, you're very, very tight with Jennifer

Lopez, right? Yeah. She's been one of my best friends for 20 some years. I mean, she still is. We talk all the time and I love her and we both kind of went through a lot of grieving at the same time in the second year of my loss of JR. So because when you're grieving the loss of somebody you love, they don't have to die. You can grieve a relationship. One thing I learned in this whole process is that people grieve divorce, people grieve a lot of different things and I didn't see it as such beforehand.

And now I do. I do. I really understand it now and I try to be even a better of a friend because I really do take pride in being a good friend. Right. And you actually put yourself in the situations. I feel like when you're having conversations with your girlfriends or whatever it is in life, like you put yourself in the situations. I feel like when you're having conversations with your girlfriends or whatever it is in life, you put yourself in their shoes.

I do. I think it's whether it's me or you or whoever. I think that's important. A thousand percent. Guys, I believe the power of therapy can be so strong. Sometimes you don't know the weight you're carrying mentally. And when you recognize that weight, it's often too much to handle on your own. I have had so many friends figure out what they're dealing with and how to help themselves through therapy. And that's why I'm so excited to tell you about Rula today.

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You may be doing one or two of these on your own, or you may be searching for answers and spending tons of time and money and nothing's working. Without a complete approach to balance your hormones, you're not gonna see results. So stop guessing and stop suffering. Bell Vittel has all this laid out for you. Go to Bell Vittel, that's Bell B-E-L-L-E, Vittel, V-I-T-A-L-E, or click on the link in the show notes to see the full program. Then use code BV15 to get 15% off. I want to talk to you a little bit about your new book, which is Scrambled or Sunnyside Up, Living Your Best Life After Losing Your Greatest Love. Yeah, that was hard. That was hard. sunny side up, living your best life after losing your greatest love.

Yeah, that was hard. That was hard. I just got the chills, by the way, because I've seen your greatest love in action and in person probably has a little bit to do with it, but it's such a powerful, just saying living your best life after losing your greatest love to me is a pretty powerful thing to say. It's a hard thing to do and you have to find it, I think, in you. JR died suddenly. It wasn't like I had time to prepare for it. He wasn't sick. He didn't know it. As you know, he took that vaccine booster and got a blood clot neither one of us knew, went away on the boat. We invited you guys. That's the funny thing. You guys were supposed to go on that trip if you remember.

I do remember. I remember Joe coming to me and saying JR just text me he wants us to go with them on the trip. They're going to take the boat and he gave me the dates and I don't even know if I text you about it Lauren or not. We're trying to work on the date. Yes, we are trying to work on it. And I had another event or filming. I had something that I wasn't able to go. And I think about that all. And Joe thinks about that. I know. They were so close and Jare just loved him. He found a guy's guy that he loved so much, but he called Joe and he was like, Lauren, do you mind if I invite Melissa and Joe?

I was like, of course not. I'd love that. And then I know you wrote me, I'm trying to work out the dates and it didn't happen. Of course, in essence, if I go back now, it probably was better because I would never want anybody to endure what I had to go through on that trip. But just losing him so suddenly three days into our journey of really trying to take a little time for ourselves, which we had never done as you know. We'd always spent our life helping other people.

It was like, let's go away and do ourself for a minute. And he'd even stopped Amber from coming. She was supposed to be coming in 48 hours later. And I think he just started to feel something was wrong. He was off. He wouldn't communicate that with me. He would never say he was in any pain, but that blood clot was hiding behind his knee injury

that he had from wrestling. And we didn't know it. We didn't see it. And it was awful. That day was awful. And it took me two years to try to forgive myself for not seeing it. You go through a lot of guilt, grief, anger, mad, sad, don't know what to do, more sad

days than anything. And I just had to wake up one day in this fog and this cloud and this haze and say, he wouldn't want me living my life this way. He wouldn't want me living my life in a way that I couldn't get out of bed or I couldn't perform or I couldn't do the things that he always was so proud of me for doing. Cause you know, Jared was such a proud husband that, you know, he was always like,

my wife's, you know, badass, you know, I love her. She's great. I can't even imagine like feeling that you, you feel like you knew he felt something was wrong. He knew it. He felt something wasn't right. I told you. In those couple of days, he was quiet, unusual, and you know JR.

He's not quiet. Not quiet at all. I mean, let me just put it into perspective. He's come to my house before. We've had him over for a dinner party. I had a wrestling match in my home, right? I had a full match. A wrestling room for my boys to practice.

JR has a full, he's a wrestler. He's a prior, you know, previous wrestler when he was younger probably and all of that. He has a full on wrestling match in my house with Joe Gorka. Full-on wrestling match. Happiest moments of his life. He's the life of the party. Life of the party, singing, dancing. I think we left our house at 4 30 in the morning and we had so much fun. So Jair's not a quiet guy at all. You know, we had just come off of our convention.

We had just left Ben and Jen's wedding in Savannah. And he was quiet. He was fine there. But when we got to, and when we took that final fatal flight to Croatia, I'm sure that didn't help it either because the clot was already there and we didn't know that. So, you knew nothing about the clot? already there and we didn't know that. So you knew nothing about the clot? No.

You had no idea he had a clot? No. We knew that he had the vaccine the end of June. We knew that his blood work came back off. I always tested him after he had a vaccine. His blood work came back off, but the doctor seemed to think it was fine and that maybe had a cup of coffee before he took his blood, maybe had breakfast before and read it wrong and retested it when you guys are back. And I thought, are you sure?

And they were like, yeah. And we took that final fatal flight. And of course I never got to bring them home except in a bag. Jesus. That was awful. But just being on that boat and watching him be quiet and kind of pondering his life, I could tell over the water. I kept asking, what are you doing? Why are you sitting out here for so many hours looking over the water?

He's like, no, I'm just grateful. I'm thankful. I love you. I can't believe you made this happen. I just felt like something was off. He was giving you a ton of words of affirmation to tell you, like he wanted to say everything that he wanted to get out. Yeah, well, you know, I told you, he told me that morning, and I have a hard time talking

about it, but that morning he did wake up and he said, you've made me the happiest person in my life. And I thought, why are you saying that? Because our guys, they say, I love you 900 times a day, but they don't ever say, you make me so happy. Right. Right. Because also, not just me, but life.

Because when a man is super successful like JR, their appetite is enormous. It's an insatiable appetite. You can never fill or satisfy that type of hunger when you're always looking. And for JR, it was never about money. It was always about helping people. So for him, it was like, well, how many more people can we help? So the appetite just grew. Every time we had more success, he would be like, we can do more. We can help more people. But this time time it was different. He wanted to go away and spend time together alone. But he thanked me. He's like, you've made me so happy.

And I said, why are you talking like that? Right, you knew. I'm saying that I felt wrong. I felt weird. It felt strange. And I was like, well, you know how happy you've made me. Why are you saying this? But it was a very emotional moment

in the bedroom that morning. I always say I was so happy we the bedroom that morning. I always say I was so happy we had sex that morning. Oh my God. See? See, he made sure. He made sure he left his mark. He was like, I know. He just like, I always thank God for these moments, but he said, I'm not feeling my best. I'm going to go up and have breakfast, stay in bed. And I said, no, I'm going to go with you. But at that point, did you not say like, okay, maybe we have to get him to a doctor? Like were you sick?

He wasn't complaining. He wasn't saying he was sick. He was just... He was just out of it. He was just tired. I said, do you feel okay? He said, I feel great. I said, are you sure knee in any pain?

He said, because he couldn't walk properly anymore. He was lost. He was walking properly, but slow. And I said to him, I said, you know, and we were two days later, remember we were going to see the real Madrid doctor in Spain. So we had an appointment. Oh, got it. Okay.

That was knee looked at. It was being looked at two days later and we had an MRI in May. They told us it was just the cartilage, you know, coming off of it, that between the bone and the knee where it's forced injury. But that's where the blood clot hid. It hides behind injuries. And I didn't know that, of course, until after I had spoke to Serena, who had, you know, Serena Williams, who had her own issue with blood clots. And that morning was just, he was even more quiet.

He was very gracious. Thank me, wrote me a beautiful letter thanking me for getting my bike, getting the yacht, doing what we did, that we were going on this journey together and that he wanted to thank me for making him so happy. But he did not... He walked past me after a call. I was on the phone and he took a deep breath. And I said, why do you sound like that? What's going on?

Why are you making that noise? And he said, stay here, stay here. And I was like, no, no, why are you making that noise? He's like, I said, stay here. That was the last breath he took. He walked away. I waited, you know how Jera was, like if he was a man and he put his foot down,

you'd listen to him. And I waited a couple minutes, waited a couple minutes and I was still on that call, which I, you know, you know, it took me a while to forgive myself for that too. I stayed on the call and like two minutes later I said to Mark, my brother who was there, I said, can you go check on Jaret's weird, he didn't come right back up. And Maria, his wife walked through the door and she said, he's on the floor stretching doing yoga. And I knew Melissa, at that moment I lost him.

In that very moment I dropped the phone, I started to scream, I knew I'd lost JR. Cause I know JR would never be stretching on the floor doing yoga when I was on a phone call about the boat. Right. And I couldn't make it to him. You know, I was six feet away from him. That was his last breath.

You know, I didn't know that that he was holding his breath at that moment and passed out. And that's how an embolism kills you. And you basically pass out, but you die. And I didn't know that at the moment. And, you know, I thought maybe they were like, he's not breathing. And, you know, I was like six feet from his feet, but I couldn't get to his face I couldn't see him like that and I

kept hitting my head against the wall and it was just an awful awful time. Oh my god I couldn't even imagine I can't even I can't even fathom. No I'll never I'll never um you know you deal with grief but you deal with PTSD you deal with seeing it right there in front of you. You know, all I kept thinking about was this can't be happening. This can't be happening. He's going to come back. He's going to be fine. And they were doing, they were defibrillating him on the boat, but we were out at sea.

You know, everything was against us in another country. They don't speak English. I didn't speak their language. Of course they shouldn't speak English. I didn't speak their language. Of course they shouldn't speak English. I didn't speak their language. So... Do you think it was instant? Was it an instant death?

Yeah. The coroner told me that night, because the ambulance, the paramedics had to sedate me. You know, I wasn't well. And the coroner told me that breath he took was the last breath. He held his breath till he walked about 20 feet and dropped to the ground and that was it.

And no defibrillator would have saved him, no CPR could have saved him because nobody knew it was a blood clot. Everybody assumed it was heart. And that clot was hiding behind his knee and that's what clots do. They hide behind injuries sometimes and we didn't know it. And he didn't know it. You know, J.R. was a Marine his knee. And that's what clots do. They hide behind injuries sometimes. And we didn't know it.

And he didn't know it. JR was a marine biologist. So I was pissed off at me and he and I because we didn't know it. He's the doctor of the family. So why didn't he know that we had this happen? Why didn't he know that there was possibly a clot? His knee was stiffening over two weeks.

We should have seen some. You go through all that, but he didn't see it and I didn't see it. It took me a long time to forgive myself, which is why I wrote the book because... And in chapter one, as you know, chapter one, it's a different law until the end of the book. I think you just learn to forgive yourself and see things differently and realize that neither one of us see it. And then you start to wonder, is this the way God plans it out? You know? And I think- I believe that. I do believe that your time is your time and it's going to happen.

And there's a reason possibly that Joe and I didn't come. There was a reason that you two were together. You had that morning together. You were- Joe wrote me afterwards and he was like, we were supposed to be there and I want to be there. He was devastated because- Oh, you have no idea. You guys were supposed to be there and it was, you're supposed to be on the yacht sailing in the med with us doing this incredible journey that we had not done in years.

It was life alteraltering. The worst pain of my life. You know, I lost my mom when she was young. She was 42. I lost my dad when he was 63. I'm no brief. Lots of loss. Lots of loss, Lauren. Ready to prioritize yourself in the new year? Your skin is a great place to start. Dime Beauty, founded by a master esthetician, is more than just a skincare company. With four skin-conscious categories, skincare, beauty, body care, and fragrance, Dime offers simple spa-worthy products that will help you enter 2025 with confidence. Whether you're revitalizing your regimen with nourishing products or building one from scratch,

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program. Just visit ProLonLife.com slash on display that's P-R-O-L-O-N-L-I-F-E dot com slash on display to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift. The meaning of this book, because this is what I'm dying to ask you, Scrambled or Sunnyside Up? Give me the meaning of the title. Real short. I mean, every day, you know, I was with Jer for 36 years. Every day, his whole life, Jer would ask me, should I have pay hey baby, good morning, should I have my eggs scrambled or sunny side up? And for the first 10 years, I would answer him just gladly,

like, how about scramble day? How about sunny side up? Maybe scramble today, you know, we change it up. But after 11 years, 12 years, like all marriages, if we're honest, like you and I talked in the beginning, when people are honest, we get frustrated with each other. And we're like, I don't know. What do you want today?

It's your stomach. I'm not eating eggs. What is it that you want? I'm not eating breakfast right now. You're a pain in the ass. Why do I have to answer that question? And instead of understanding at that time, not until after I lost Jare, but that was Jare's love language.

He cared about what I thought. He wanted to know what shirt he should wear for dinner. He wanted to know what jacket he should put on. That was part of it. I do remember you dressing. He did tell him. He did tell him. Yes.

You would tell him what to put on. I do remember that. What's alone? What's this? I love him for that. If there was a big thing at the company and they were asking him for a decision, he would say, well, what this? And I loved him for that. And if there was a big thing at the company and they were asking him for a decision, he would say, well, what did Lauren say?

You know, and I loved that he loved my opinion the first 10 years of our marriage like that. And then all of a sudden I got so busy with the company, so busy growing together that I let the things I fell in love with frustrate me. And that's stupid. And I didn't see that then. And I would do anything today for him to ask me,

scrambled or sunny side up. I would do anything to have those moments back. And when you go through grief, your life is scrambled. And you can turn it sunny side up again. And I think it was a perfect play for the book, a perfect name for the book, and very deep and very meaningful for me and J.R. for people like you who know that he would ask me things like this all the time. This is how he functioned.

That's how he loved. And I'm grateful for it. When I think about it today, I think about what a beautiful love story to care that much about somebody's opinion. It's so beautiful. It's so beautiful. It's beyond beautiful. The meaning is so strong. And I knew it had to have something good behind it for you to title this book that. How did you find yourself again after such a life altering event? Give us a timeline.

I think the first year I was just in a total cloud. There could be a room full of people, as you know, people coming to me, taking care of me, and I couldn't see a single one of them. It was as if I were alone. And I was OK with that for a moment. Amber was setting up babysitting schedules, and I was like, I don't need a babysitter.

I'm fine. She'd have all my friends come and take turns spending the night and you know, uh Serena was one of the first people who came to me and said You've got to forgive yourself. You didn't do anything You didn't know he had a blood clot. He didn't know he had a blood clot You got to forgive yourself for not going to sit there and hold him while he was already passed

Uh the first day I did go every day after thereafter at the funeral home. But while it was happening, I was in total denial. I froze and I couldn't do it. And so she was like, you got to forgive yourself. You know, you've done nothing. This is not your fault. And she really helped me through the journey. She explained to me about how pulmonary embolisms are silent killers.

Nobody knows about them. They're not talked about a lot. Nobody ever discusses it. Nobody knows to go check to have an ultrasound and make sure they don't have any clots. They don't even know what to look for. That's the scariest part, honestly, from when you're talking and saying, I'm like, how do you... You can have like a silent killer going on in your body.

It's something that kills so many people and we really don't know how many people because of it. But you know, we don't know, like had I known to look for that his knee was maybe red or inflamed, you know. And every time I would approach him, he'd be like, Jer didn't complain. So he would be like, babe, it doesn't hurt. It's just stiff. And I was like, okay.

You know, and he was a man. Jer is a man. So you don't argue with a man like that. Like I'd let him be a man. He's a man's man. Definitely. Definitely. He's a boss.

I think during this time, Jennifer was there a lot and we both went through it a lot and Amber and the children. I had a hard time really realizing anyone else's pain. There was other people who were grieving that I didn't acknowledge at all for the first year. For the first time in my life, I wasn't a caregiver. I just try to operate through work. I worked all the time, and then I realized I had not dealt with my grief.

And then I started to just really go through, you know, different therapists, trying to get help, trying to find a way to battle this anger that I had. I was angry, I was upset, I was sad. All of the things that you go through through grief. And then I realized that there would be no way to get around grief. It will stay with you forever. And the best way you can deal with it is to navigate it.

The best way you can, because it never goes away. And that's why people say, well, is this a book about grief? No, because it's the story of my journey because I can't tell someone how to eliminate grief. I don't know the answer. I just know how to find your way through the clouds and still live your best life if you can, if you're willing to trust yourself and say, you know what? He wouldn't want me to live this way. I've got to show up. I don't want my children, my grandkids to see me in a way that, you know, I can't operate. And I remember watching a video of somebody interviewing Amber and they said, how has it been since you lost your dad? And she said,

I didn't just lose my dad. I lost my mom too. That crushed me. And I promised myself from that moment, I would really work on being more aware of her own feelings, being aware of how I would be in front of other people. Not that she wasn't, she gave me all the grace in the world. I just didn't want her to feel like she had lost me. I get it. And that's why you pull yourself back up again, for the kids, for your daughter, for the babies, right? You have to. And I think that's so important.

I think you have to show up for them. And also, my grandkids were broken. They were broken. They were going through their own pain. So really, when I stepped back, I thought, it's better for us to try to work on our healing together. And so we learned to keep them alive in everything we do. Is the guilt the hardest part?

For anyone who's listening, that also feels like they'll never be able to get through the pain of losing a loved one? Is it, I guess in certain situations it's going to be different, right? Because you feel like you were there, you feel like he was sick. Once you got past that guilt or whatever you were feeling and realized it's not your fault, this was... No, I think that you go through anger, then you go through more sadness. I think it comes in waves. It really does. It's like standing and looking at the ocean, but you're backwards.

You're facing the land and the water comes in and knocks you out from behind. It's one thing you go into the water and it takes you in. It's another thing when you're standing, you're looking at the land and the wave, giant wave, eight, 10 foot comes and sweeps you away and you're not prepared for it. It comes in waves and I think, you know, two days ago I had a meltdown, you know, today I'm better. You know, you go through stages, but I still operate.

And I've learned to operate really well independently of my personal feelings and my professional. It's interesting, I've learned to separate things like I'll rate myself. I was doing this with Angie Martinez yesterday. We had such a great conversation about this that you have to like rate yourself every day, like a one to 10.

Like where are you professionally? One to 10. And you ask yourself, you know, and so we both answered like, you know, she was like a seven and I was like, moving in a direction of real reinvention. So I felt like at the moment I was like a 10 plus. I was reinventing myself with the company, the company's doing great. I'm reinventing.

But personally, that was a two or three at that moment. And she's like, Oh my God, that makes me sad. I said, well, I was a zero just a year ago. So the growth is there, you have to see it as growth. And by the way, I see myself growing all the time. It's just, if you look at Lauren's preferred professional life, it's wonderful. Everything's great. Jared took care of us. We built an empire together. We, you know, put away for 30 lifetimes.

That's a beautiful thing. And we've changed thousands of people's lives along the way, but none of that matters at the end of the day when you lose someone you love. You can't take that hearse with the U-Haul behind it, take the things you want with you. And so personally, life is always looking different because I don't know what I see for Lauren's future. It's hard. I mean, that's always a question that I have for you as well is like, could you see yourself ever moving on or dating again or even wanting to look in that direction? It's an interesting question and you're only a good friend, like you could ask me that.

And I think my initial reaction is it's not at all on my mind. I have no desire to date whatsoever, but that doesn't mean I'm shut down in my mind. Initially, right after, I was like, absolutely not, never again. And now I feel like I don't know what the future holds. Maybe I'll have a good best friend or somebody cool in my life that cares about me like I care about them. But I don't think you ever have that type of love more than once. about them, but I don't think you ever have that type of love more than once. And, you know, I've had it and I'm really grateful for it and really so fulfilled in the storybook type of love that when I say storybook type of love, I don't want people to get confused. Love is hard. There are days that, you know, JR drove me nuts. There are days that, you I'd be like, I'm done with this. We're human beings and we are expected to feel certain things. And that's one thing I remembered

when I was going through my grave. You cannot punish yourself for the things you didn't see. Just like Jerrick Hinton, just like you said, I believe that God has it written in the books. I do. I do too. 1000% is there, it's written. I've always believed in that. That's just my way of life. I think you're right. I didn't ever really think about it till now over this last year, but I think that with the storybook type of love, if somebody came along and they'd have to be super intelligent,

really successful. A really hard worker. A really hard worker. I don't think they'd think about, listen, they would have a lot super intelligent, really successful. A really hard worker. A really hard worker. Listen, they would have a lot to live up to. A lot of shoes, big shoes to fill. So I don't know what that looks like. And I just tried to say, not say never anymore, but- I always say that. Never say never, Lauren, because you know what happens when you do that? The complete opposite, never happens all the time. I know. I know. You're right.

Never say never. We don't say it. You're right. You're right. And so my whole world has always been keeping an open mind about everything in life and being positive and inviting the good things in. And so I just, I don't want to say never, like I always said before, but I just, not right now. And I think that's okay. Which is fine. Which is fine and which makes sense for you. I asked Amber and Ava though one day at lunch, my granddaughter, we were at lunch. Alejandra Sanz was with us and she said, somebody asked me at the table, would you ever consider

dating another friend that was there? And then Ava said, well, just so you know, Pop Pop would be destroyed. He would be devastated. Devastated. And I was like, and then Amber looked at me and I said, well, just so you know, Pop Pop would be destroyed. He would be devastated. Devastated. And I was like, and then Amber looked at me and I said, well, how would you feel? She said, well, I'd be traumatized. I'd be traumatized. And I understand it.

And so I think, you know, plus there's this whole community of people, right? So, you know, it's so much harder. I have the weight of a lot of people on me. Of course you do. Of course. Like they, I don't think on me. Of course you do. Of course. I don't think they could ever even picture you holding hands with someone. Oh, God. Imagine Fat Joe, Jamie Foxx.

Jamie Foxx is here. Imagine him, I was just turning laughing down the hallway, but imagine him literally. They would go crazy. They're like brothers to me. They go crazy. They're such psychopaths that they're like, turn your DMs off. I'm like, I don't have my DMs on. You know, they crack me up.

Yeah, your DMs are going to start going. I will. It's funny. So we'd laugh about it. We joke about it, but have all these big brothers who watch out for me. These guys are in every week taking care of me, stay with me, make sure I'm okay, sit around and watch movies with me at night, help me with work reinventing. You know, it's a tough place to be because I've

had to in two short years and you know this, the world has changed so fast that you have to reinvent yourself all the time. Oh, constantly like this is this is the world now, especially with social media, which you know, and like, it's a constant redevelop, like you can rise one day, you're at the top of the top, then it starts to decrease, you gotta come back up, you have to reinvent, you know, you know that better than anyone,

and I'm learning that now as well. You know? The world is changing faster than we've ever expected. Right. And the future for the next five years, like I'm thinking about, I used to think five years ahead, I'm trying to think 15 right now

because I can't keep up with how fast it changes. And so really making major moves with the organization in such a great positive way, but it's a shake up, right? It's like you shake up people and they're not used to it. And thank God I have Mark, my brother, who's amazing at understanding that we always have to be able to it. And thank God I have Mark, my brother, who's amazing at understanding that we always have to be able to pivot. And so we're in this real reinventing creative space,

which I've never done without JR. Right. That's a very strange place for me to be, but I'm really excited about the future right now. Imagine an app designed to make you use it less? Seems counterproductive, no? Well, Apartments.com's instant alert feature works exactly that way. Instead of scanning rental listings a million times a day, simply set and forget your search to whatever you're looking for in a place and let Apartments.com do the rest.

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I feel like you were at a very, very low point. I remember you didn't come out, you didn't come up for air, you didn't want to see the sun. I didn't want to be seen. I didn't want to be seen for a while. It took me a long while. And I know you kept trying to come out and see me and go to dinner and I just couldn't go out. But I think what happened was is- I can tell just by dinner we had recently that you have come out of it. No, I'm trying to come out of being in a dark space alone and realizing that I'm not alone. And that's the thing, I think the best advice I can give to people is to understand that there is no overcoming grief ever.

It will always exist, but you learn to navigate it better. You learn to realize that love grows in grief. And when you understand that and accept that, that you can, love doesn't die, it keeps growing. You still love them. In fact, some ways you feel even closer. And also that you find grace for yourself, that you forgive yourself for things that I'm not performing the way I need to perform, or I'm having a meltdown today in front of people, or I'm not my best, I'm not performing the way I need to perform, or I'm having a meltdown today in front of people, or I'm not my best,

I'm not performing at my optimal best, you start to realize that, you know what, you gotta wake up in the mirror and realize that you did perform before this. You did act before this. You were, you know, you can be a shining star, and whether you lose someone through death or you've lost yourself, you

have got to be able to get up in the mirror and realize and look at yourself and say that there is nobody but me who can make this happen. There's nobody here but me that can make this happen that I've got to be the one to step up and show up. Nobody is coming to our rescue. They're just not. Right. And time moves on whether you do and you don't have to lose anybody to know what I'm talking about. Time moves on with or without you. One thing I've realized when people say, Oh, time heals all that bullshit. Time doesn't know anything. It's just an emotion. It doesn't feel anything. I mean, it's just a thing. It's not emotional. It doesn't feel anything. It's a clock. It keeps going. It's ticking.

When you wake up, you realize that life goes on. So you've got to take action. You've got to do something. Most often we're in our own way. And I think I got in my own way during this and said, you know what, let me separate the two. And I really learned to operate individually of what I could do to push myself forward and how I felt someday day sad. And I would rate each one of them differently. And then I could see the growth in them each time. And that really made me feel fulfilled in some ways because I could see I was growing and that I could still do good in business, but maybe I was having a sad day. And I think because of it,

I wasn't so hard on myself. I love when you say you rate, like you're rating your day, you're rating your emotions that day, you're rating yourself. I think that is the best for self growth, right? It is. It's how I measure me. It's how I measure where I am emotionally, where I am mentally. And if I say, if I'm having a really tough day at work and I'm overreacting at work,

and then I question where I was personally, and then I say, let's take a deep breath, because I know why, because if I can separate them, see, we try to lump everything together. We try to say, oh shit, business sucks, we're not doing well, we're not thriving, and, but things are great at home. So all of a sudden you commingle this,

and then what happens is, is that everything gets messy. Instead of saying, I'm really proud of myself that things are good with Joe and I. Here. With Joe and I. But I'm working on me professionally, or things are great professionally, but I'm still working on things at home,

and I want people to understand X, Y, Z. And when we separate the two, I found that I can operate better and I can see the growth that I have. And that's why when Angie said to me, when she asked me, I said, I'm a two or three today, I said, don't be sad. I was a zero last year and I've been a 10 before and I'll grow again. And I see this as growth, but if you're really honest with yourself, you can't lie about the number. And that's powerful right there because it's kind of evaluating your own situation, putting

it in your own hands, right? It is. You don't have to share with anybody. You can just say it out loud. She loved it so much. I flipped the cameras on her. I was like, where are you today? And she was like, oh God, nobody's ever asked me that. But it's hard. Where are you today? I said today, I'm probably like an eight or nine and professionally, because, you know, yesterday I had a long day trying to convince, you know, when you're trying to convince a team

to do what you want to do, you're moving mountains, right? And so that's always hard. And professionally, I'm more at afforded. I mean, personally, I'm more at afforded. I woke up, I felt better, I was excited to see you and you have things that you look forward to. And so, well, I grew in the last two days. I felt better. I was excited to see you and you have things that you look forward to and so why grew in the last two days. So for me, I see the growth all the time.

Yeah, you're you're it's the rating thing. I'm personally going to take that into my own hands and I'm going to rate it and I think it's important and I'm going to tell Joe Gorgas for you as well. I'm going to tell Joe to you have to sometimes separate even when you have multiple businesses like, okay, this one's here. This one's there I'm super happy at home But sometimes I feel like Joe takes the weight of the world as well on his shoulders with all of the different things he does and one thing I want to tell you is JR was incredible with him with that like they spoke a lot about business. He always wanted to help my husband.

They've had conversations that you probably don't even know about. Yes, he just wanted like he saw a really hard worker. You know, they're both, it's a very, JR is from Jersey. He was a Jersey boy. Where's a Jersey boy through and through and through. He was from Lakewood, New Jersey, which is the next town over to where I grew up. I know. And another reason why he loved you both so much. And I hate that. I hate that. I love that you guys had that and it makes me- Oh my God. He was such a mentor to my husband. My husband had great loss losing him. They spoke on the phone for a lot of hours.

And Joe wrote me a lot after JR passed away, as you did too, but Joe really wrote and I could feel his pain. And it's something that I learned to address later, as I said, because I didn't think about how many people were grieving JR yet. There were so many because he had built this big community and I just felt like I was a little bit alert. Yeah, but you had to lift yourself up first. Yeah, and I think that's the other thing. It's like, we have to give ourselves grace. We have to lean on others. We have to ask for help. We have to reach out to other people. And I got really good at that. And so I could be on a call with a Zoom call with my work

with board of directors and I can have a full meltdown and cry. And I'll say, hold on guys, give me a moment. And I'll walk away and pull myself back together and I'll come back and I'll keep going. And that's how I learned to separate the two, but I don't apologize for it. I don't end the call because of it. I said, guys, I'll be right back. Give me 10 minutes. Don't earn my lead.

And I'll keep moving because I've learned how to separate the two. And when they cross, I deal with it. And so- You must learn how to shake it off. Like you do. You do. And I think-

And this is coming from a powerhouse entrepreneur businesswoman that you had, but like, look, we all break down. Everyone breaks down. Oh, you got to remember personally when Jera was alive, I was a 10. 10, 10, 10, 10, 10. All day long, yes. All day because I was in total control of my atmosphere. When I'm not in control of my atmosphere, I have a meltdown.

Everything in my atmosphere has to be controlled by me. I need to be in a safe environment. I need to be in control of no chaos. And so I was great at it with JR. JR loved it. He relied on me for it. He liked that I put us in this positive environment. You couldn't come into our circle, as you know, unless people gave us, they'd be like, oh, well, we want to go on the boat with you and Joe and Melissa. And we'd be like, we need your resume. Yes, yes, yes. We have to be a group.

We don't need negative hair pulling crazy people in our world. No, not at all. Don't. Now you don't need to you have the best of the best the best people surrounding you. The the forwards in your book are literally from Alicia Keys, Jamie Foxx. Who else you have 100,000 Fat Joe, everybody. Fat Joe, oh my God, Fat Joe, I had such a great time with him and his wife on your boat. I had memories on your boat.

They love you. When did we come on the boat? That was Jennifer's after party after the Super Bowl. It was Jennifer's after party for the Super Bowl. I know Jennifer and I talked about her doing the Ford, but then everything went on with her and Ben and I felt like she was grieving too. So we really helped each other through that time and it was hard.

I remember you guys went to Europe and you just had a little world trip. Yeah, we wanted to take away and get away the first time we really just said, let's go do this ourselves. That was my first girls trip in my life. And we had such a great time, but we came back to an eye-opener. And that's why a lot of the book in there talks about what a great friend she's been and how amazing she's been. And that circle in your life that is so important today

that you realize that all the extra drama, all the nonsense that goes on outside of it, I don't wanna be a part of it. I wanna protect this circle. I wanna know that this circle has my back All the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama,

all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the drama, all the world, Lauren. We can have the cars, the houses. Doesn't matter.

It does not matter unless you have someone to back you up and someone to support you. Unless you have somebody that you want to spend it with, unless you have somebody as your back, unless you have a ride or die, none of it's meaningful anymore. And that's why I always tell my children, I'm like, I want you to understand that I don't see any of this that your dad and I built and have together as mine. I am a custodian of other people and your futures. And I think that it's very important that we care for other people and we do things, the right things that love people and lift people up.

And you can't do that in a drama-filled world, in a negative-filled world, I don't understand it. We've gotten to this point in the world where we actually thrive off of it. Which is crazy. You're right, and even the media. Yeah, and I know, and you, God knows, you've been through it, but you're one of the most

family-oriented, loving human beings ever. So to be, even have to try to keep up with that, nobody wants that. That's not your vibe. It's not. It's a lot. And so it's going to be very telling to see how, which way this show goes, right? To see kind of like- It's true. But you know what? If it doesn't go the way I think it should go and you're not back on that show, that means that the world thrives in drama and really nasty drama. That's not what we should want or look up to or what we want to be, and that's not who you are.

I know you go well. You live and breathe and die for your family, so you would do anything to make anything come together and work. And, you know, sometimes people should just say, Whoa, where am I at? What am I doing? Right. It's really confusing. Like, you know, I guess, you know, people have to really experience a great loss.

Like I did, uh, to when they're, when they bat shit crazy to realize and wake up and realize like, Hey, what am I doing? Life is short. Life is short. You can't get this back. Let's drop this nonsense. You know what? It's true that you don't appreciate until it's really gone. You don't realize. Oh, no. That's what the whole book's about. This whole book, I hope whatever somebody gets from this book is walking away and saying, you know what? I don't have to lose someone before I can stop this and say, you know what? Stop the madness. I love you. I'm sorry if I've acted a certain way. I'm sorry if I've done something wrong. I'm sorry that I was

mistreating you. I'm sorry I was rude. I didn't think about your feelings. I'm sorry I said ugly things. You don't have to lose someone to stop and say, why wait? You can't get it back. Right. And that's what this is about. That's what scrambled or sunny side up and reinventing yourself. Lauren, I you have just talking to you today. We're so inspired. Everyone is thank you so much. I love you. I'm proud of you and what you're doing right now. You're doing so many good things. Oh my gosh. Yes, I have you know, the sprinkle cookies are decided about sprinkle cookies in a way

that I have never by the way, I'm sending you a box soon as I needed I needed I actually can't believe I haven't sent you a box yet. I have your book right here though. And you know, I need everyone to make sure you grab a copy of Lauren's book scrambled or sunny side up living your best life after losing your greatest love. It just came out this week, guys. It is Yes, it's available on Amazon. Amazon, Target, Barnes and Nobles, anywhere where they sell books.

And anywhere where they sell books guys, you do not. This is an amazing human being all around. You want this advice, you wanna read this book. Make sure you guys grab it. Lauren, I love you. I love you so much. I miss you and I'm gonna see you next week I hope. Yes, I wanna see you next week.

1000%, love you. I love you so much. Bye honey you and I'm going to see you next week, I hope. Yes, I want to see you next week. A thousand percent. Love you. I love you so much. Bye honey. Ciao. Bye baby. Hey moms, have you ever felt like there's more to motherhood than what we're told? Then you need to check out our podcast, moms ask why. Hosted by Chelsea Jules and Brittany Whitney, moms ask why dives deep into the tough questions surrounding motherhood. Our mission? To educate, inspire, and empower moms like you to take charge of your children's health.

With real talk, expert insight, and actionable advice, this is the podcast every mom needs in her playlist. Because sometimes the best way to be a great mom is to ask why follow rate interview moms ask why now on apple podcast spotify or wherever you listen to your podcasts. Groundbreaking films including Selma, Django Unchained, Ali and Coach Carter. You have an incredible gift up here. Gripping series like Power and The Game, next level comedies, music video channels and more. Brilliant black entertainment, intentionally curated and all free. This month and always on Pluto TV. Stream now, pay never.