On with Kara Swisher - Nikki Glaser on Shame, Sex & Owning Who You Are
Episode Date: April 20, 2026Comedian Nikki Glaser’s star is on the rise. The two-time host of the Golden Globe Awards is set to take the mic for a third straight year in 2027. Glaser was also just named one of Time magazine’...s most influential people of the year. And on Friday, Hulu is releasing her latest hour-long comedy special, “Good Girl.” It’s an exploration of aging, fame, and sexuality in Glaser’s signature raw and self-deprecating style. Kara and Nikki talk about why she thinks it's wrong to shame women who spend money on their appearance and why talking about sex is still a big part of her comedy. They also discuss why she shies away from making political jokes right now and what it’s like to have her breakout moment in her 40s. Questions? Comments? Email us at on@voxmedia.com or find us on YouTube, Instagram, TikTok, Threads, and Bluesky @onwithkaraswisher. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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If you crash in a private plane, no one feels sorry for you.
I think it's like we're, that's my biggest year now.
If you were on a Southwest.
Yeah, if I'm on South West.
Oh my God, what a woman of the people.
What a hero.
Died so young.
People hate people flying on private.
They do.
Yeah.
And this elitist bitch, she deserved it.
Hi, everyone from New York Magazine in the Vox Media Podcast Network.
This is on with Kara Swisher and I'm Kara Swisher.
My guest today is comedian Nikki Glazer.
She's really having a moment right now.
She hosts the Golden Globes this year and last.
year, and she's set to do it again in 2027. She was just named one of Time Magazine's most
influential people of the year, and she's also about to drop a brand new comedy special
on Hulu on Friday. It's called Good Girl, and in it, Nikki jokes about aging, fame, and her
sexuality is personal raw and self-deprecating, which is really Nikki's sweet spot. I really
enjoy Nikki Glazer. I think she's incredibly refreshing. I think it's interesting what she talks about,
especially going there about her sexuality. And I know there's sort of a take that women
and talk too much about their sexuality.
I think she does in a really smart way.
And obviously, she's engendered a lot of fans
because she is indeed having a moment.
And it's in her 40s, and it's well-deserved after a long career.
So let's get to my interview with Nikki.
Our expert question comes from director and producer Judd Apatow.
Nikki is working on a film with him,
and she also used to babysit his kids.
This is going to be a really fun one
because Nikki is a lot of fun and very thoughtful, too.
So stick around.
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Nikki, thanks for coming on.
Thank you so much for having me.
It's an honor.
So let's start with Good Girl.
I'm a huge fan.
Obviously, many people are.
But this is this new special, which comes out this week.
It's your fifth one.
But you've expressed a lot of fear and anxiety about its release, and you said you don't even want anyone to watch it.
Yeah. I don't know. I just, I kind of had this revelation when I was editing it that now that it's like coming out, I guess the editing process is a whole other kind of torturous, you know, self-examination. But now that it's coming out and people are starting to see it and I was hearing from my publicists, you know, like we've sent out early copies of it. So people are watching it like today. It was just, yeah, this sense of doom that, um,
People are going to see a side of myself that maybe is a little bit more darker than I, I guess my image is now that I've, in the past couple, you know, two or three years have had a more mainstream image.
And there's maybe something in me that wants to protect that and to keep that kind of popularity coming in because it's, you know, made my life a lot easier.
And I've used this analogy before, but I'll use it again because it's just so apt for it is that I just feel like stand up for me is like sex.
Like I enjoy it.
It's something I like to do.
It like lets me behave in ways that I would not normally behave, say things and do things that I am otherwise ashamed of doing.
And then when I started doing stand-up, you know, it was just like open mic nights and just clubs where there was no worry of it being recorded or anyone being able to even, you know, review it.
I mean, I never put out clips online or anything.
And so it was like, even if people came out to me after the show and quoted me back to myself, I could almost denounce.
I could almost deny what I had said because there was no proof of it.
So it was like this safe space.
So to me, when I think about my stand-up, it's like hearing people kind of talk about, you know,
if someone after sex were to be like, oh, that thing you said or that one time you did that thing,
you're just like, no, no, no, no, we shall not speak of this.
I don't want to hear about it.
It's just so, it's embarrassing to me.
So when people see my special, I kind of change the subject really quickly.
I just want kind of, even now, I'm like, let's move on to something.
So sorry, this entire podcast is about your comedy. No, no, no, it's, I have to promote it.
We can talk about Pete Hengseth, if you like. Oh, no, thank you. He just quoted. Yeah, who just quoted Pulp Fiction.
What a moron. As a Bible quote, yes. You can't write this. I know, you really can't.
So do you get like this with all your specials? I do. I think I just started to explore that feeling because it's, it's, it's, I'm like this with everything I put out. Not everything.
Because there's some things that I don't have a problem watching. If it's, I'm acting or, if it's, if I'm acting or, if,
I'm singing or like any kind of, but when I'm being myself, I have a hard time watching it.
I think it's like editing a special is the most uncomfortable thing I've ever done in my life.
And honestly, in the past, I've had to delay the releases of specials because I just couldn't watch it.
And I couldn't, I couldn't edit it.
And I'm not someone who pushes deadlines, but that's the only time in my life that I've had to because it's just so incredibly painful.
But you want to edit, right?
Yeah, you do, because sometimes you outsource and you go, oh, well,
trust my friends to look at it and give me their notes on it. And then in the end, the self-consciousness
that makes me not want to watch myself is the same kind of self-consciousness that makes me as the only
one who could edit it. Because it's you. Yeah, it's me. Yes. I mean, I just did that with a special
letter for Sanna and I, like, very much was like, it's me, don't tell me what I am. So how do you
overcome that? Do you not? You know, the one time I struggled with it, I was reading the Tools by
Schultz, I'm thinking his name is. I forget his name, but he's kind of controversial now,
but there was one quote in it. It was like, I love fear. Fear. Fear sets me free. And I was just
repeating that to myself over and over of like, I just have to be uncomfortable. I just,
I mean, honestly, the only reason I do it is because I have a team of people that are
asking me to do it. Otherwise, I probably would never release a special ever. Or if it just
wasn't a part of my career, I would love to just have stand-up be this thing that is just
live in the moment and there's no record of it.
Which is your favorite part, right?
So Phil Stutz.
Phil Stutz is the author.
Phil Stutz, yeah, Phil Stats are, yes.
So you eat fear for breakfast?
Is that the message?
Yeah, that's the thing of like, I love fear.
I run into fear.
Picture fear is like a wall that you have to run into.
And so I kind of go into that of like,
I know that my self-esteem is built upon doing things that are hard and conquering them.
So I know that on the other side of doing this horribly and comfortable thing
is me feeling better about myself.
And it does always, you know, wind up that way.
The thing that I fear most of, you know, regretting some decision I made.
I mean, there's so many regrets I make in the edit where I look back and I think,
oh, my God, why didn't I just say this extra line?
Or why didn't I describe this part differently?
Or why didn't I make a funnier face at this moment?
And I just have to think, okay, you know, I've worked a lot on that of listening to a lot of Sam Harris
meditations and podcasts about regret and how there's no point in it, first of all.
And also, there's something that me not doing that funny face or me not making that extra
tag that really only fits that joke.
I can't really use that again.
There will be some use for it someday.
You know, even in talking about it right now, this is a use for me regretting something
is talking about regret to hear with you.
But you can also, editing is a constant process.
Like, I know Mike Brubiglia does things over and change.
them on the course of his journey, essentially.
Well, that's my problem is that I should be watching and listening to myself through the course of putting together a special.
And I don't.
I just go off of memory.
And if I were to even watch my set one time before and review it, like everyone tells me to, I could be so much better.
So I think there's always just that fear of realizing my potential.
It's not about what I feel.
Or you don't want to look at yourself.
Yeah.
Because one of the main topics and special is your appearance and the pressure to maintain it,
which is interesting. There's a line where you say, when you look fuckable, your life is great.
And a lot of your jokes center on how you embrace that harsh truth because it helped you professionally.
Talk a little bit about that.
Yeah, I actually just was rereading Tina Fey's bossy pants.
And she had a great part in that that really synthesized everything I want to say about that
is that one of the things she learned from Lauren Michaels is that don't feel bad about asking for a makeup touch-up or perfecting your lighting or making sure that a scene that you're,
putting together on SNL is dressed well and detailed and pretty because if people are
drawn to it optically, they're going to hear you more. So I think in the end, it's just about
really wanting to be heard and feeling like when you are pretty, both men and women are drawn
to watch you and then therefore listen to what you have to say. Hmm. Interesting. Does it bother you
at all? Yes. It was really interesting because I was watching when you were talking about it. I was like,
she thinks she looks bad?
You know what I mean?
You know, it was interesting.
Yeah, I mean, the obvious question is male comedians don't face that same kind of.
In fact, many of them do not look good in any way whatsoever.
No, they don't.
And they lean into that.
And I'm very envious of being able to not have to care about that stuff because it is so time-consuming.
And I feel like I would get a lot more done.
And I would just be more rested and just a more well-balanced person if I didn't spend so much time on all the upkeep to look a certain way.
But then there's a part of me that also,
feels bad that they don't get a chance to really level up and that they kind of don't have as many
options to draw the eye as women do. So, you know, we're getting into Manosphere talk here of like,
women just, you know, but there is a part of that that I do have some compassion for with men where
like they, if they have a Zit, they just have to have a Zit. Well, they could look smacks. You know, it's a thing.
Well, now, yes, they could break their bones with a hammer and see how that works out for them.
That guy's not doing very well today.
No, he's not.
No, he's not.
But, yeah, it's something that I struggle with.
I'm both grateful for it, but I also resent it deeply.
And I'm also terrified of it eventually kind of falling away from me.
So you made it material.
No, you were talking about facelifts.
That was very funny.
People come before you with their bad facelps, presumably.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Now men are in the bad facelph period of time, I've noticed.
Yeah, they're getting them now, too.
And I get why.
I mean, it's really, there's really good work.
out there now that can be done really subtly.
Yeah.
You kind of, you can't, you don't notice it as much anymore.
And that's the other thing is like the more success I've had and the more money I have,
the more options I have to look hotter.
And it kind of feels like if you aren't doing everything you can and reaching again,
your potential in that realm, you're failing in some way.
And there's almost like a wistfulness for when I used to not be able to afford Botox.
And I could say, okay, well, I look like shit because I can't afford to look hot.
And now that I can afford to look hot, it just feels like, God, why am I not doing this thing?
And oh, my gosh, they came up with it.
And the peptides.
And I should be doing that laser.
And then there's another.
And then you do that laser.
And then two months later, you go in and they go, oh, no, that laser removes the fat on your face.
You need the fat on your face.
So there's.
And the peptides.
I mean, I just listened to you, talk to that guy about him.
And I'm so glad to hear that maybe I shouldn't be doing those.
Because I was for a second.
And then I fell off because I didn't feel any.
difference. That's correct. I won't go into it, but men are more into it than everything. I'm getting yelled
at by a series of gay men right now. And I'm like, I don't really care what you say. I mean, sure,
use it, knock yourself out. But one of the things, it is that vicious. Although I was just thinking,
as you were talking, I was like, I can't think of a male comic who's actually hot. I mean, I can think
of a lot of actors. Yeah. Who? I mean, there's some good-looking ones. I mean, I don't want to
name names because I don't want to give them any credit.
because I'm not such a fan of their material.
But there are some that are attractive, but it is distracting, and I think that it hurts them in the end.
Oh, interesting. I think it's a very low bar for men, I have to say.
It is a low bar. I mean, it couldn't be truer that just like men just age, we just accept they're aging a lot more,
and we trust them more as they age, and we think they sound smarter and have more to say,
and we let them pause longer and take longer to tell stories, and we hang on there every word.
whereas I just don't feel, I'm just fearing that when I start to, like, show the signs of aging that people won't care anymore.
And there's proof behind that, though.
Yeah, it's true.
But this special was recorded in St. Louis, which is where you grew up and where you live now, correct?
Yes.
And the Midwest is a very different place than New York, L.A.
Now, St. Louis is a pretty hit place, actually, for people who don't know that, but it's a pretty cool city.
And you joke about how people don't care as much as what they look like.
can actually insult the audience.
So talk about living there.
I didn't realize you lived there.
Yeah, I moved back.
I was in New York at L.A.
pretty much after college, just pursuing this career.
And then I found myself in New York during COVID.
And I just was like, I'll just move back home with my parents because this is scary and
work is dried up.
So I just moved back into my childhood bedroom in pretty much March of 2020.
And then I hung out there for 10 months living with.
with my parents who are like, you know, my favorite people.
And we just had a great time.
And then as soon as they kind of were like,
it's time for you to move back out.
I just didn't, I just didn't feel the need to go back.
I think I was actually very lucky because I was at a point in my career where
I didn't really need to be on the coast to be seen and to be thought of for projects.
People were already kind of aware of me.
So I kind of reasoned, you know, if someone wants me to do something in L.A.
and they don't have a week's notice to give me
and, you know, $400 for a Southwest flight,
then it's probably not a project I'd even want to do anyway.
So I feel like I can just be in St. Louis.
And also, I just feel like I know that I'm, you know,
addicted to work and I can really hurt myself with it.
And I guess kind of felt like I'm going to keep work on the coast
so that if I really want it, I go to it.
And it's not just something that is just always outside my door
and making me feel like I'm not doing enough.
You know, if I'm living in New York, there's always a set I can go do that night.
There's always a podcast that I can jump on that day.
And here in St. Louis, there's just not, I don't feel those pressures, so I can kind of just relax.
What is it like living there?
I sleep late.
I play with my dogs.
I take a Pilates class.
I go visit my parents and hang out with them.
I have like a visit my sister and her kids.
Like, I kind of just do honestly nothing.
I do a lot of sleeping because usually when I'm here, I'm just.
catching up from just, you know, nonstop. Go, go, go. Yeah, yeah. What is the mood there?
I mean, it's St. Louis is more liberal, obviously, and I have friends who live in Kansas City,
same thing. But what's the mentality different? Do you feel that or not?
Well, I just, just in terms of show business is the thing that I pay most attention to is that people are
as driven here, not show business, business in general, I just don't feel like people are as driven here
for good or bad.
I think for me it's good
because I just don't feel
as in competition with others.
I think here it's about
what your yard looks like
and how your home is decorated
and what school your kids go to
and those are not metrics
by which I measure myself at all.
So I feel a lot more free here
to not judge myself
and not compare myself.
And also I just, people
just don't care about celebrity here.
It doesn't feel gossipy.
It doesn't feel,
like I'm being watched or that, you know,
and I've told the story before,
but it's just so funny to me that, you know,
the week before I hosted Estenal,
like sitting in the hair chair,
getting my hair done.
And she's like, do you have any fun plans coming up?
And I go, oh, I'm hosting SNL next week.
And she goes, fun.
And then just like, keeps going.
And I'm like, if it was just, you know,
I was ready for her to go, what?
Because it hadn't been enough, you know.
And there's just, they just don't seem.
to be as awestruck by those things. And much to my parents chagrin, I mean, my parents are so disappointed.
They want to dine out on it. They want everyone losing their minds because they lose their minds,
but I just tell them, like, people just don't care about that stuff as much here. And I'm, I, it,
tickles me, actually. That's funny. Fun, fun. That's really good. Fun. Fun. Like, I have a, you know,
a college friend's wedding coming up. Right. Exactly. Right. And I go, did you hear I'm hosting? I'm not
watching it. I'm not hosting a party. It's just, no, oh, fun. So I appreciate that.
Like, it's just not, you know, it's important, but okay, it humbles you. Yeah, I get it.
Now, shifting, total shift, another major theme in the special is your vagina.
You spent about 15 minutes talking about it, the anxiety you felt when you were younger about
how it looked. Even in 2026, a lot of people are uncomfortable with a woman talking,
frankly, about her sexuality. Why did you choose to make it such a big part of your special?
I enjoyed it myself.
You know, well, the main reason is that the jokes just killed on the road.
I mean, there was, there's just a thing you feel on stage where you start doing kind of the dirtier comedy that I've been like known for where you just feel a pop from the crowd where they just get energized.
It's at the end of the show.
They've been sitting there a while and they somehow summon all this energy to laugh so much harder at those jokes.
And you're like, no, the vagina comes out.
Right.
Yeah, it was just like, I, you know, there's a part of me that felt it.
was hack or, you know, so many women get, female comics get told all you talk about your vagina and
sex and it's like so easy. And I never want to feel like I'm doing the easy hack thing. But
I can't deny that it was killing. And I also thought, you know, if I let that kind of rhetoric
determine what I talk about on stage, I'm just going to be placating into the, again, like the male
comedians that I've started in my career trying to impress. And I just, I just don't want to do that. And I also
just feel that it's still important.
I feel like women still need to be really a lot more open about their sexuality,
and it helps a lot of women and men understand women's sexuality more.
So I just felt, you know, if there was still some girl who has not heard me in the course of my career
talk about my insecurities about my vagina, I want to reach that girl and let her know,
like, she's not alone in the way she feels about hers and the anxiety you have when presenting
it to someone new.
Right, because men never talk about their penises.
Because real comics, never.
I know there's not enough.
It's really, I'm excited for them to tackle that at some point.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's just, but there is a part of me that is ashamed of it and that maybe I put it at the end of my special hoping that maybe some people wouldn't get to it.
So I wouldn't be judged for it because it's, you know, it's something that I, um.
No, it works.
I am embarrassed of doing, you know, I get called a sex comic all the time and I get kind of, um, there's been opportunities I've lost out on.
I would say earlier on in my career, that were more mainstream network TV.
Like talking about your washing machine.
Yeah, that people thought, oh, she's too dirty, so she can't go on this show because she's
just going to talk about her vagina.
And they didn't realize that I know when and when not to do that.
So I, you know, and I also just don't want other female comics to have to suffer what I have
created for them, which is, like, more evidence that all we talk about are vaginas.
But I think there's so many different ones.
They all look different.
And so I feel like there's a lot of different angles to cover.
I felt it was perfectly fine to talk about it.
It was like fun.
Thank you, Kara.
And by the way, men do talk.
I have a four-year-old who does not stop talking about his penis, and he's not even a comic yet.
Oh, yeah.
I mean, it is fascinating.
It's not.
I always want to just talk about.
I'm three boys in.
I only have one daughter.
You've heard it all.
I've heard all about it.
It is what we're not supposed to talk about.
And I think that's maybe one of the reasons I am talking about is because I didn't have a chance in growing up to ever
make jokes about it. You can't touch it if you even itch it and in front of your parents and you're just
like playing with it. What are you doing? You know, there was a shame around it. So I think I'm always just
drawn to the things that as a kid or teenager, I just felt like I couldn't talk about. So speaking of
your parents, your dad was sitting in the front row of this. He's listened to that before, presumably,
right? Yeah, I think he had heard it before. He'd come to see me on the road before. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. He handled it
well. You know, they have been through the whole thing with me. I started out, you know, 20-something years ago,
really putting them on blast and talking about really disgusting stuff.
Like, kind of, I was just, I was a late bloomer, so I was just kind of exploring my sexuality
and really bringing it all on stage. And so my parents were always in the crowd supporting me
and kind of just stayed quiet about it. They'd never shamed me about it or said maybe don't do that
or, oh, this is so embarrassing. But I came to find out later on that it was really embarrassing
for them and really uncomfortable. And I just, I never even considered their perspective on it.
I think that if I would have, it would have hindered my creativity in some way to consider how
they felt and to have empathy for them in those moments.
And I did have a moment, I would say 15 years in where my dad was in the crowd and I was
describing giving oral sex or something and I just saw his shining bald head in the background.
And I had to stop and I was like, I cannot believe I'm doing this.
Dad, I am so, it just dawned on me how uncomfortable that would be for him.
It wasn't even about how I felt.
I really, I don't have embarrassment.
around it for some reason, but I saw it from his perspective because I guess I could see my
reflection in his head. And I was like, I am so sorry. And it was this like awakening on stage
that happened in real time. And after that, I was a little bit more, you know, like, I've just
told my parents, like, you can go to the bathroom for this part of my set, if they would come to
my show. Now, this one in particular, I was like, I think they can kind of handle everything that I'm talking
about. But they're just so proud. They don't care. Yeah, your dad was asked about advice to others whose kids
get into come and he said get some thick skin.
Yes.
Which I think is the right answer for a parent.
That's it.
Your special ends on a kind of full circle note.
You talk about rejecting insecurity and feeling confident in face of imperfection.
Talk about that because that's where you get to accepting yourself.
And at the same time, it doesn't go away.
Yeah.
I don't think it ever goes away.
I feel like I am always striving for, I guess, perfection, acceptance of myself is
more the thing that I'm trying to strive for now is acceptance. And I like that it's an ongoing
battle. I think it is what fuels me to keep going and to even pursue this career because it's
there, it's an empty pursuit. And if I wasn't trying to achieve the world thinking something
of me and how they perceive me, I really wouldn't continue going. There's no point in doing it.
I mean, the money is nice. So that is, you know, something that I,
I like about it, but the attention, I mean, that comes from a really sad place of wanting, expecting
a crowd of people to sit for an hour and listen to me talking to a microphone.
I'm not singing.
There's no dancing.
There's no lights.
There's no video show.
Like, I mean, it's really expecting a lot out of the crowd.
I'm honestly shocked that people go to comedy shows and have the attention span for it now.
I'm always really impressed by people.
I mean, I do as well, but I just, I'm always really proud of myself afterwards.
Like, I just watch someone monologize.
It just feels like something that we,
we shouldn't have the attention span for anymore.
But I feel like I hope it never goes away.
I kind of like my insecurities.
And I am, I'm secure in my insecurities, is what I feel I am.
I really am.
Like, I feel like I had a friend once who was like, would never admit she had low self-esteem.
And she would always say to me, I can't believe how you could admit that you have low self-esteem.
That's just something I could, I probably do have.
She couldn't even say that she even, she was like, I might have it, but I would never, ever.
say that to anyone and say it out loud and especially to everyone. And I've just never felt
shame about that. I really, I know that that's okay. And I just am, I'm always on a quest just
to be as honest as possible. And I think that that is also, if I am as honest as possible,
and people still like me, then I guess I feel likable deep down because I think there's
something about this business that feels so fake that when people like me, because of, you know,
the Golden Globes or a roast or a photo shoot I did or, you know, whatever it is, I can't really
let it in because I'm like, well, that's not really me. You know, that's, it is me, but it's,
it's months and months of work that was to make this one version of me that is so glowy and
so unattainable for me if I don't completely, like, you know, doing a Golden Globes, I have
to give up my entire life. It's not, it's like an Olympics. It's not something that I could keep doing
forever. And so I don't really like the praise for that. But then there's the praise that comes where
people go, well, then I'll praise you for how hard you work. And I'm like, well, I don't like that either
because that means I'm not talented. That means, oh, you just work harder than everyone else. So I,
I'm just never really satisfied. And I think I need that. It's, it's the engine that fuels me.
Yeah. Yeah. Well, it's interesting because I think comics are very vulnerable and they're telling a
story and to hold people's attention is very difficult. I don't know if you remember. There's a movie Tom Hanks and
Sally Field did about comics that I still stays with me to this day. I don't know why. It wasn't a
huge hit or anything else. Punchline, I think it was. Punchline, yes. What stays with you about it?
The vulnerability of them and the insecurity and still walking out there. Cruelty a little bit
towards each other. It was very unlike Tom Hanks too, because he was a little bit cruel, right?
Yeah, yeah. And the desperation. I just, every bit of, and Sally Field does that desperation better than
anybody.
Yes.
Well, that's the comedy I like most, is that is when someone is sharing a part of their
psyche that's really shameful and that is, you know, is really embarrassing.
I don't really like comedy that's just talking about the other day this happened or just
observational comedy, although I respect it and it's not something I can do.
It just isn't my cup of tea.
I really like when people are kind of humiliating themselves in a way that makes me like
them more and feel closer to them and makes me like myself more. We'll be back in a minute.
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Let's talk a little bit more about your style of comedy
and some of the major themes you like to explore.
Now, obviously, you noted this in the show.
You gained a lot of fame from your appearances
on Comedy Central roast.
A lot of good ones, the Tom Brady one,
really sent you over the top, I think.
The jokes you made about him were brutal,
and he was sitting right there,
which I thought was great.
Can you just talk about roasting?
Is that a different thing?
Because you kind of set it offhand, like, in an interesting way in the show.
Yeah, it feels like a different skill.
I mean, for me, it's about joke writing.
That's what drew me to roast most of all is I love really tight jokes.
I like one-liners.
I like just a real sharp turn of phrase.
It feels like little math problems.
It just, to me, has always been an expression of intelligence that I've respected
in, you know, the Mitch Headbergs or the Stephen Wrights or Wendy Liebens, just these, like,
just being so concise.
So I always like that about it.
And also, you don't need much of an attention span.
You're just on to the next joke before you're bored.
I really don't really enjoy storytelling comedians because I can't, I just don't care enough
to walk through an entire story with them.
And it's so, it's not very often that compelling the whole way through.
And it feels too self-important, all the pauses, and just expecting the audience to follow
you on this journey to the bank. I just don't care. So I always loved the sharpness of the joke writing
and it was just something that, yeah, I think I first got started doing it just helping my friends
write jokes. They were doing the roast and I would just submit jokes and see what I could get on.
And I got some on it and it was just such a good feeling to write a joke that people were talking about.
And then I think the other thing I like about it is that it's like you get to be so brutally honest.
I mean, mean, yeah. Do you have to have the right amount of mean. And honestly,
is, it is mean, you know, like, just Taylor Swift's lyric, you called me up again just to break me
like a promis so casually cruel in the name of being honest. Like, you can be so mean but and just say,
but I'm just telling you the truth. Do you not want the truth? And so it's, it's, it gives me
permission to do that. That's why I like them is there. It's protected by this. It feels like
the most protected space of free speech of like, this guy signed up for this. They, they didn't
give any parameters or they gave some and I'm advice.
biting by them. And so now I have to find loopholes where I can hurt this person in ways they don't
even know that they were going to be. What was the parameter there? You know, there was just like stuff
of like, hey, maybe don't, you know, in the past roast that I've done, it's just like,
don't go after their kids. Don't go after maybe a person in their life who's sick or old or, you know,
like, it's stuff like that that I always respect. I don't mind anyone telling me, hey, don't joke about
this. It's going to hurt my feelings. Like, fair enough. And that's never my goal. But it is my goal to
find an angle that other people haven't explored.
Get the loophole.
And when you get it, it's like that feeling of when you write a joke that no one else has
thought of, and it's a new type of joke that none of the roasts have ever done.
Because a lot of it's just like, you know, a plug-in-play.
Like, you can really write a good set using a lot of the same tropes and tricks that have been
done before.
So that's a really fun nut to crack.
And it's just, yeah, and you're just allowed to be a psychopath for seven minutes.
I mean, it's insane the things that I've gotten away, I was saying.
Was there one joke you liked or wanted to put in?
Yeah, there's always times.
Even with the Golden Globes, there's always times where it's like, oh, this is the best joke I've ever heard or written or, you know, someone in my writing staff writes.
And, you know, you just can't do it because it's just going to make the room feel too weird or it's just too harsh for that moment, especially like a Golden Globes.
And you just have to let it go and it's so painful, but you just think, okay, maybe I'll put that in my.
book someday when that person's dead or something.
Speaking of the goal, you don't
touch on politics a lot, although you did include some
jokes about Epstein files in your opening monologue,
which I thought was interesting.
Talk a little bit about that, how you
made the decisions there. Yeah, I mean,
I was so immersed in it at that time anyway.
I have gotten away from it, like
I think we all have, unfortunately,
recently.
But Malani had brought it back.
She really did.
And we still don't know exactly
what that was preempting,
but it's, I'm waiting.
every day for that other shoe to drop.
But yeah, I was just so, I was reading so much about it.
I was so mad about it.
I mean, if you like true crime, there's a lot going on in there.
And there's a lot that the mainstream media can't even report on because it's too grotesque to even paraphrase.
I mean, it's like, it was crazy the stuff I was getting into.
So I think it was on my mind a lot.
And also, it's one of those things that no one can deny is wrong.
Like, no, that to me felt totally safe to go after because, you know, although,
there were people in that room that night
that were definitely in the files,
like, no one's going to
say that's mean of me.
It felt like a, you know,
for lack of a better term, a safe space to
go to. Right, right.
For a monologue. And
but in the right way, because I think
actually Epstein, you know,
2019 till, you know,
the drop last winter,
was like kind of an easier joke to
make and to reference because we
didn't know the horrid details of it as much. And I think it was a little bit more risky given
that. But I forget the, oh, yeah, it was like, oh, a lot of A-lister's in the room tonight. And by A-listers,
I mean people who are definitely on A-list that has been heavily redacted. So I felt like that was,
that was safe enough because you're not getting into any of the details of it. And I didn't
say his name. And it's just I said list. So there was a lot of things about that that I felt like.
Well, list is now, Epstein, just for people. Exactly. That word is now. And your biggest hit was
your CBS joke, though, I have to say, I think that one got the most
a tick.
Are you surprised by that?
No, I think I knew that I was so happy that CBS did not cut that because, you know,
that was one that I was really worried that they were going to see.
And I would have understood if they were like, can you just not?
Like, we're paying you a lot of money and we're putting a lot into this.
Can you not throw us under the bus?
But they liked it.
And I think when I did in rehearsals, a lot of the crew and cameramen were all laughing.
And I think the powers that be saw that and just knew it was undeniably just going to be a killer.
And I think that they wanted, you know, they wanted that show to be killer.
They wanted that headline, you know, they wanted the press that would maybe come from me doing that headline more than the bad press associated with it.
And I thought it was really, I was really happy that they let me do it.
It was a great joke.
Thank you.
And I'm glad they let you do it.
And I hope they continue to let people do that.
We'll see.
So let's get to our expert question every episode.
We get an outside expert to ask one.
Here's yours.
Hi, Kara and Nikki.
It's your old friend Judd Appetal, here in Savannah, Georgia, directing a movie during World War III.
I have a question.
Is it possible to be funny during World War III?
Also, is it possible to not gain weight?
How can we be funny when the world is so fucking?
weird when our government is stranger than every single character from Dr. Strange Love.
Anyway, just wondering.
Mike.
Well, he's a great example of someone who is continuing to be funny and miss all this.
And I think that, no, I mean, I've really struggled with it because it's just made me so depressed
that it's hard to be funny.
And it's hard for me to even look at my own life and be funny about it or think that anything
in my mundane life that I'm complaining about, like,
like my lip filler is interesting to, for anyone to hear about.
But, you know, I think that, I think we just have fatigue with all of it.
And people need to, I do, I know that's often used a lot of like, we just need an escape.
And it's just a reason people give to justify making bad art.
But I think that it's true.
I think people do want to think about anything else.
And I think that I want to talk about anything else.
And we're, it's almost nostalgic.
to worry about the dumb stuff.
It was interesting because you had said to Howard Stern
that you pulled some political jokes
from your monologue, for example,
like Trump and ICE.
Was it fatigue or that you just was hard
to strike the right tone, as you noted?
I just don't want to say his name,
to be honest with you.
Like, I just don't want to give him air time.
There were lots of jokes that, you know,
said ICE and Trump.
And I just, and the ballroom, we had jokes about,
you know, I just didn't want to say his name.
I just felt like I did,
I knew he would be watching, and I didn't want to give him the satisfaction of having anything
to respond to. And I just, and I don't want those words to come out of my lips. I mean, I can't even
I really, I don't listen to him. I don't watch him. I just read what he says. I sometimes watch it on mute,
but I really, I can't, I can't stomach it. And so I just don't, and I don't talk about it on stage
because I don't, when I'm doing my stand-up, I don't want to know who in my crowd might be on that side,
because I don't want to resent anyone in the crowd
because then I get angry
and it starts to,
and no one likes an angry woman especially,
but just in general,
it just doesn't mix well.
And I can just,
when I get heckled or something
or something disarms me on stage
and there's an angry side to me,
I just lose the crowd instantly.
It's like they don't trust me anymore.
Like the bus driver
that is like driving the kids to school
is suddenly like freaking out
and then everyone gets scared.
And so I just,
I try not to just,
I try to talk about it
because the times that I have
and I felt like the crowd go in a certain way.
I just start, you know, aiming my jokes at only the side that I like.
And I'm just, and these people made money and I don't want to make them feel bad.
And it's not their fault that they have the ideology that they have.
I would, too, if I had their same brain and grew up in the same family and the same place in America.
Like, I try to remember that no one has free will and everyone that likes him.
I would like him, too, if I was that person.
I try to remember that.
I feel lucky that I, that I have the.
brain that I have that knows, you know, how ridiculous it all is. Right. No, it also does bring down.
I mean, some of it, some of the comedy can be very funny, but it's sort of not funny. Like,
you see a lot of the daily shows and stuff like that, and they do a nice job, I have to say,
they're pretty funny. I like Kimmel's anger at it. You know, like Kimmel is able to harness his
anger and frustration with it in a way that I really find soothing to me. Yeah. And also, you know,
John Stewart's just consternation at it all and frustration is a really funny device.
for it. Yeah, it was great that he was the one being saved by Jesus Trump. That was
that. Was that John? No, it wasn't, but he looked, it looks like him. And then in the back,
I just a few days ago interviewed Jose Andres, who's doing World Central Kitchen. And the guy in the
back looks like him with a hat. And he said he's gotten 7,000 texts from people, because it looks
like him. What an honor. And he's like, what was I doing there? I don't understand. I was in
Gaza feeding people. And then I was in this picture. And it does.
Oh, look at it. You're like, whoa. What is happening? I really haven't taken that image in outside of
his doctor, his medical garb. Yeah, and then there's a character from a sci-fi. The whole thing is,
whoever does this, I kind of want to meet all Trump stuff. They don't even like fact, they don't,
they don't even watch it or review anything they put up. I just kind of want to be in the room as they
make it. Like, what are you thinking? Someday we're going to find out.
A teenage boy. It's some really fucked up teenage boy. I know. Mostly wants to hear about your
vagina.
We'll be back in a minute.
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Let's end talking about business of comedy in Hollywood generally.
Obviously, podcasts become a huge part of comedy right now.
You had one for a few years, but ended last year.
Talk about, is it shaping comedy these podcasts?
Because a whole lot of comics are doing them now, like a lot.
Well, it's getting people to go see comedians because they find out about them through
podcasts.
So I think it's helping in that way.
But I think that it's made the bar a bit low.
for comedy because you, you know, stand-up comedy takes work and it takes effort and
rewriting and punching up and reviewing and trying your material over and over again.
And that has kind of become a lost art because there's just this expectation now that
you should just have fresh stuff all the time and just be able to be funny on command.
And I think that it's lowered the bar in the sense that, yeah, people are just expecting,
they expect less, I guess. And so they're entertained by less. But I think I, I hear
a lot, I mean, when I'm looking on Reddit and reading about people going to see stand-up shows
with their favorite podcasters, that they're often very disappointed because it's not what they
expected it to be, because it's not the right place for the level of professionalism for a podcast.
I mean, it's, yeah, it needs to be more polished. So, you know, obviously, why did you stop doing it?
Now, we went on tour and did really well because it was the show. We just did the show. Yes. Well, yours is
polished. You have, you have notes. You've done your research. You're not just, you know,
there's, you have a system in place and you work hard on it. There's a difference between,
you know, there's a lot of different ways of podcast and there's, and I enjoy the ones that are
just shooting the shit. There's times, and the time and a place for that. But I stopped
podcasting because I wasn't giving it that effort. I just was sitting down and just shooting from the
hip and saying things that I didn't even really, hadn't really thought through and couldn't
really back up. And I was just feeling like I was getting to a place where my words were being
taken more seriously and being paid more attention to by like page six. And I was getting
things poll quoted that I didn't even remember saying. And it was becoming kind of embarrassing.
And it was also like, you need to have a video podcast now. So it was about doing hair and makeup
every day. So you could look presentable enough for this to live online forever.
and, you know, when you level up in show business, like, now I need full glam for when I'm going to be on camera.
I didn't get it today or is, you know, like, there's a time and a place, but like, you know, I just was feeling like this burden every day of like, I have to look a certain way.
And some days I would just look tired and then that's out there forever and then people are pulling.
It just was, it was just too much pressure.
You didn't like it.
I love it.
Every time I do it, I love it.
I love it.
I did love it.
And there's parts of it that I miss, I miss having that connection with people who feel like they know,
you and you get to talk to them every day. Yeah, I mean, I have it too with celebrities. So I really
liked providing that for people because I felt like, yeah, if you listen to my podcast and you think
you'd be friends with me, you're probably right. I'm really myself on this thing. But I just felt
like it was for people who were paying attention that wanted something that weren't just
looking to listen to something on their drive to work and were actually trying to pay attention
to what I say and glean something from it. I think I was falling short. And I, I, I,
I really like to make, I was just, as I get older, I just want to put out things out that I'm proud of
and I wasn't proud of it. And so I'll go back to it when I can work on it.
Yeah. Do you feel like you have to be on them? I mean, to say how important have podcasts become to
comedy as a business? Yes. Yeah, so important. I mean, it's, it's just a way, yeah, it's like
doing the Tonight Show was the biggest deal ever to me, even when I did it after the boom and like,
you know, first time I was on Tonight Show 2009, the hugest deal in comedy, and was so until
probably five years ago, and it's still a big deal to get a late night set, but nobody sees it.
Nobody really, it doesn't move ticket sales like a podcast does, so you still have to go on these
podcasts. You have to weigh, and especially now that, you know, some of the most popular
comedy podcasts are on the wrong side of things. You have to, you know, there's a moral dilemma there
of what am I going to do.
Look at polar.
Polar.
There's a lot.
It's changing, I have to say.
Yes, there's a lot more now to do that are just, you know, are getting the same level of attention that are not as problem.
That's not problematic.
But it's heavy right wing.
Yeah.
Scott and I are always in the top 10, but are always surrounded by Candace Owen and Mark Levin.
Yeah, that's what it is.
Megan Kelly's always hanging at the top, like looking down on us with her angry eyes.
She's mad.
is I do feel like I still need to do them. I am nervous about them every time I do it. Like,
I did one last week. I did call her daddy. And, you know, it was like a two-hour conversation.
It was so much fun talking about sex open. She's such a girl's girl. And it was like,
I just felt like we were like best friends by the end of it. And I maintain that we are.
Like, I really feel friends with her. And but I was talking like I would a best friend.
And I was feeling like, oh, you know, I wasn't even thinking about censoring myself in any way,
knowing that this podcast gets, you know, makes headlines.
And then, you know, a week later I wake up to just headlines about Nikki Glazer
says that she likes for her boyfriend to sleep with other women.
And it was like five different headlines showing up in my feet.
And I don't even follow myself.
I don't look for news about myself.
I, like, avoided at all costs.
And it was just really embarrassing because I was like, that was just one little thing I talked about, like, oh, I'm kind of turned on by this idea of it.
And then it was just everyone I knew had seen it that day.
I went into like do some voiceover work.
And even the people on the Zoom on the voiceover were like,
well, a lot of headlines about you today.
And I'm like, that is so humiliating that they know this.
Go to the hair lady.
Go to the hair lady.
Fuck it.
Exactly.
Oh, fun.
No, that's the one she would know about and care about.
Oh, no.
And so that's the other thing that's like, I just get like nervous now
because I, in these spaces, I do feel like a connection with the host.
And I do feel comfortable.
and I feel like, oh, no one's really going to listen to this too hard.
And then I just have to pay more attention now to the stuff I say.
But then, you know, it just goes away in a day and no one cares.
It's like, it's fine.
Exactly.
I never pay it to it to it.
I've gotten it, apparently I've gotten to 17 beeps with Megan Kelly.
She always talks about her show and I ignore it completely, except one time I wrote,
because there was so much of it, I wrote back, I go, it's never going to happen between us, Megan.
And that ended it.
It's just, I said, please stop.
Kind of like the Taylor Swift song about what's her name, Charlie X-E-X.
Oh, yes, yes.
Yeah, that was a great song.
It's so fun.
So petty.
It's delicious.
It's so much fun.
But I just, I mean, did you, do you find, you probably find out about most of these headlines because
you have friends texting you or.
No, I don't care.
I don't pay attention to them.
Because I don't pay attention to it.
It's just like I find out from people who write to me about it.
I don't even pay attention to my friends text me about it.
That's so good.
I got to start blocking them.
I have four kids.
I don't got time for this.
I got to get kids.
That's maybe my problem.
You can borrow mine if you like.
I got a lot.
And they're all different ages.
So a couple more questions.
Hollywood's in the middle of a huge shake-up,
talking to the bigger business.
Obviously podcasts are part of it.
But tens of thousands of jobs have been lost
is still reeling from COVID and labor strikes
and production moving abroad.
Marvel's just moving to England.
There's things.
There's a lot of fear over,
obviously, Paramounts,
pro's takeover Warner Brothers.
I've never been so inundated
with celebrities who want to come
on and talk about this paramount deal and really big ones, which is really interesting. Do you think
about it at all? Because you have, as you said, your stand-up career could go on, right? As long as you have
great material. Yeah. To be honest, Kara, I like don't look at it at all. And I know I should. And I feel
really embarrassed that I don't pay attention to it that much. And that when my friends get in
conversations about it, I just kind of slowly back out of the room because I don't really under,
I feel too ignorant to kind of understand.
that kind of talk, it just like my brain shuts off and I don't, it's like when people try to
explain football to me, like I don't understand mergers and monopoly. Like I just don't, I'm just
not that kind of intelligent and I just know where I, what I should know. And I try to understand,
there are times where I go, please explain it to me and I'll get it all and then it falls out of my
head right away. I mean, I do, I feel for everyone going through it and I just worked on a movie
that filmed in Los Angeles and I could just sense the gratitude of everyone on that crew and
Because that's dropped rather considerably.
Yes.
These people, it was like maybe, you know, one of one job they get a year.
And, you know, I've worked with makeup artists for years who were able to make a living.
And now they're thinking of moving to Las Vegas or Atlanta.
I mean, everyone in that town is suffering.
So I feel so much for everyone.
And I will say that, like, I do, that's why I really don't spend my money.
I'm always worried that it's going to drop out from underneath me at any point.
And that's why I, you know, I'm going on tour again right on the heels of putting out a special.
And I have to go to New York this summer and write a whole new hour in three months, which I'm going to get done.
And I'm excited to do.
But it is like I'm going on tour again in August, which is insane because I just got off tour.
But I'm worried that people aren't going to have the money to go see people on tour.
And that someday, you know, live entertainment is going to take that same hit.
So I'm trying to capitalize on it as much as possible and enjoy the luck that I've had in this business.
But I also just really am very cautious and save my money.
And I don't live at the, you know, like I see a lot of people living.
Like I don't, you know, I don't spend.
No private planes.
You're not getting on and off the private.
I mean, also for fear of like if you, because I'm, you know, if you crash in a private plane, no one feels sorry for you.
I think it's like we're, that's my biggest fear now.
I was like, whenever I am in one, yeah, if I'm in Southwest, people be like, oh, my God, what a woman of the people, what a hero, died so young.
But, you know, like, it's, but if I died in a private plane.
There's a whole genre of death comedy that you could do.
Oh, yeah, but I thought about it, because I've been in some private jets and I'm like, if this goes down, it's like the amount of sympathy, me and my family are going to get is so, is going to be so much less because of the private plane.
How dumb she was.
Thank you.
Yeah.
And this elitist bitch, she deserved it.
So I do think about that.
And I do feel like it's a huge waste of money.
And I don't mind flying.
I'm not famous enough that it's like really a hindrance to me to be in the airport amongst the people.
It's like I understand what people do it.
Where it's like people give Taylor Swift shit about like flying private.
It's like she cannot be out in public.
She cannot be out in public.
It would shut down the airport.
It would cause delays across.
And then it would be mad at her for that.
Yeah.
She can't do anything else.
And so I don't fault her for that ever.
And so, but I can.
still do it. I can be in boarding group, C. Two more questions. The other
disruptive force, something you've talked about, the Hollywood is AI. You said in the past,
you don't mind some of my content. It's obviously, I like when it creates a video of Trump and
Russian President Vladimir Putin making out. Do you think about it, about content around
AI? It's some of it's, I mean, like Iran is killing it right now, making these Lego commercials
about, I mean, videos about Trump, for example. They're very funny, actually. Yeah, I mean,
when done right and, you know, and people behind it have a good point of view and are, you know,
modifying it and working with it.
And you can create some good stuff if there's like a human behind it.
But, and I've used it a little bit just to like generate some starting places for jokes where I'm just like,
okay, what are some angles that Nikki Glazer would take on this thing?
And it'll just give me a jump start.
Like, you know, like anything.
Like if you were, when I used to work with my friends, yeah, with your friends.
And so I think it's good for that.
But I, I'm just like, it's just made me sad that it's like, it's ruined wonder a bit.
You know, like when I see something, when I see like a whale approaching a boat.
This is Scott said this.
He can't watch animal.
He's so angry about the animal.
No, you can't enjoy any kind of animal footage anymore.
It was already sad to watch anyway because most news about nature is really depressing or any kind of.
of stuff that you see.
So I was always kind of like scared to watch it.
But now it's just like I just, I don't, I don't trust anything anymore.
And I can't.
I think that that's the part of it that I'm like upset about is that it's just made,
you know, it's made entertainment less enjoyable because there used to be like,
I can't believe they caught this moment.
And then you just go through the comments.
The first thing I do now when I say videos, go through the comments and see who's,
who's debugged it.
Debugged it, right.
And it's AI.
Yeah.
There's one with a tiger trying to kill a hippo and then a crocodile's eat it.
I'm absolutely, I love it, but I'm absolutely certain it's AI.
Oh, I wouldn't want to watch that anyway.
Oh, God, I can't.
It's actually strangely satisfying.
I hope that's AI.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Also, you're a vegan, too.
Yeah, animal killing is not something that's really pleasant to watch.
No, I can't handle any of it, no.
Yeah, I would imagine.
So last question, you just wrapped a movie with Kim Kardashian, who is lovely, by the way, because I know her pretty well.
You're in the process, lovely, so polite.
So, just surprising.
So nice.
Yes.
I was like, you were somehow well-raised, although it doesn't seem like the show, but you are.
But you're up in Calabasas.
I'm feeling her father was a critical part of her life, too, before you die.
So you're in the process of writing starring another one produced by Judat-Apitao.
You're having a moment, and that shouldn't matter, but you're having it in your 40s,
as you know, the difference between millennials and Gen Z and stuff.
And you told Time,
Congratulations on being part of the time 100.
You've always dreamed of having this kind of success.
We never thought it would happen.
Can you just go on about that and then what you think you wanted to do next with it?
Because it gives you a certain power, obviously.
Yeah.
Well, there was just a point, I think, Amy Schumer and I were really close around the time that she kind of blew up.
It was like 2013, and we're around the same age.
We've kind of done the same type of comedy and people, you know, like I didn't, I always felt like she was just like a peer of mine that like I could look up to in certain ways.
She's a little bit older.
So there was a big sister energy.
But she was just like a someone that like we just were in the trenches together.
And then suddenly she blew up and I remember she's like a movie star.
And I was just, I was struck that I wasn't jealous.
There was a moment where I was like, I am just so happy for it.
And I remember I was able to understand that I wasn't envious because I just.
there's just no way that I would ever do that.
Like, it just seems so unreachable to become the kind of star that she was.
And so I just, I think that was the moment that I was like, I don't, I'm never going to have that.
And I can just be happy for her and put it over here and support her and truly have no envy.
I was so, because I always was so worried that I'm, my whole life is just going to be being envious of women who do better than me.
I was, you know, my sister was prettier than I was and more popular.
It was just like a thing that got, you know, embedded at me at a young.
young age of like, I am just this jealous person that I really hated about myself. But for some reason
that I was really, I was just so proud of myself that I was like just able to just be so happy for her
and just want her to continue to succeed and really feel that in my bones. And then I was like,
I really accepted it. Around 2014, I was like, you know what, I'm a touring comic. I headline
clubs. I make good money. I don't have to ask my parents for money anymore. I get to appear on
shows here and there. This is like a good life. This is successful.
Like, I did it.
Like, I am making a living doing stand-up comedy, and that's enough.
Like, I was really like, and I think I was also past the point of, like,
wanting fame and kind of realizing that that was like there was an emptiness to that
that was never going to be satisfying enough no matter how much I got it.
So I just kind of like, I don't know, I just was, I let go.
And that's when I was able to do.
Maybe being older is better, right?
You know, I think it just, it allowed me to relax and not want it so badly.
And I think the industry rewards that, you know, like, I was just able to,
do the things that I really wanted to do
and not pick and choose projects based on,
is this going to be a cool look?
Or is this going to get me to the next level?
It was like, is this going to be fun?
And do I care about this?
And so I was able to do better work because of that
because I wasn't constantly doing things
that I felt like I should do.
And I think that that is what I was ultimately rewarded for
was that I, you know, the Tom Brady roast
was like exactly the kind of thing
that I was passionate about,
that I knew that I was better at than most people
is writing these kinds of jokes
and I fought to get that position on that roast
because I knew it was going to be a big deal
and I knew that I could kill it.
So it was just, I think it, yeah,
I think it was just, I really, it wasn't like a,
you know, that quote in time that said,
like, I never thought I was going to have
this kind of success that I have.
It was almost, you read it and you think,
oh, she was like sad about it.
I wasn't even, I was like, I really was like,
okay, good, you know, like this is,
I'm so happy and I'm,
I'm famous enough, and then it happened, and I'm at this next level, and now it's shitty
because it feels like you have to maintain it, and it feels like now it just can be taken away,
whereas before I was the underdog.
It's like rich people that can't stop grabbing money.
That's it.
Like, I get it.
And I understand that desire that it's never going to be enough and that you, and that it's
going to, if you lose it, it's so much more embarrassing than not ever getting it.
Because if you don't ever get it, not that many people know you to.
and get it. You weren't that famous. But now a lot of people know I have it and now a lot of people
can know that I lose it. And I think that's it. And it will go away at some point because it always does
and you can't take it with you and I'm going to die. It's like it's it's going to go away.
So I'm, you know, I'm just trying to prolong it for what I don't know. I think I, there is a part of me
now that just wants to hoard money so that I can have a nice bunker. I mean, that really is like
a thing that I think about a lot is like I just want to live in a bunker.
I don't, but like I want, I think my parents will want to or my sister has a family,
so she'll probably want to, you know, be living during the apocalypse. I'll just, you know,
I'll off myself when I lock them in it. But I, I feel like that is like, that's now the goal.
I'm so good to have plans. Good to have things. Yeah, it is. It's, um. Yeah, I was talking to a really
rich guy who has all these apocalypse plans. And he told me them in detail, very well-known person.
And he has a motorcycle that takes him to this place, told me where the address was. And he goes,
what's your apocalypse plan? And I said, I'm going to come kill you and take you first.
You just told me the whole game plan. And then he was like, wait a minute, I didn't think about that.
Oh, yeah. He needs to stop telling people. I have one friend who's a billionaire. And I'm really in her
good graces. And I think I have a ticket to her bunker if I need it. But it's about,
like, okay, my boyfriend now has to like learn how to fly a helicopter because how are we going to get to that?
Like there's there's things I think about and I put it off and by the time it happens, I'm not going to be ready.
I don't even have a go bag for like a special shaping up right now.
Yeah, I mean, yeah.
But yeah, that's what keeps me going now.
And I'm just having fun.
Now that we're having the apocalypse, is there anything?
What is your next thing besides these new projects, right, continuing to do that?
Yeah, I mean, it's, it's making more movies.
I just finished this movie and it's going on tour again in August.
And just, I'm, you know, my goal is the summer to completely keep it open and go to New York and work on my stand-up every single night all day long.
And that's pretty much that I have to build a whole new hour.
So it's also about going out there and living life and not working so much so I have stuff to write about, you know.
Yeah, that's true.
You've got to do things.
Well, yeah.
I'll come watch you.
I would love to meet a person.
Yes.
Bring the kids up there.
So I will come watch.
I would love it anytime.
And I want to just say, I have to meet you.
first found out about you, I was listening to the Succession podcast. Oh, that was a good podcast.
It was such a good podcast. And I rarely do this, but I was just like, who is this lady?
I was like, I was in my car and I have to say, I was like, I need to find out everything about her right now.
Just your voice, just the way you talked. I just was so drawn to you. You're so incredible.
And it was, it sucked me right in. And your new docu-series on CNN is so compelling. It's so good.
And it's so funny. You're the perfect person to take us on that journey.
Yeah, way do you mean my Caritar when I create a digital version of me, a 3D version.
You'll like that.
Oh, my God.
It's very funny.
I mean, I can't even believe that you did the where you had to put your face in the aging thing and it told you how old.
Like, you did so much stuff that I was like, oh, I'm glad she has, she could do this because I would be.
Thank you, Nikki.
But they got exactly spot on.
That was incredible.
And you showed us a side of Brian Johnson where I was like, I was watching with my boyfriend.
I go, I actually, she made me kind of like this guy.
I mean, you definitely.
I'm sad. I roasted him and made him a human. You roasted, you did a great job with him. I think he would, I'm sure he's even really happy with that appearance.
No, not so sure. No, he's not. He should be because I was terrified of him before and I really afterwards was like, oh, he's sweet and there's, you know, the sadness that it's like, oh, okay. At the very end of the show, I always, I, at very end of every interview, I ask people how they want to die. Like, it's a question I ask everyone and we strung them together. Hands down, he had the best answer. Now I'm wondering how I want to die. But,
Go ahead.
Answer.
I think, I mean, I guess everyone just says in their sleep.
But I also was thinking a bridge falling on me
because I heard about a woman who got squished by a bridge
and it just happened so fast that you don't hear it,
you don't think about it,
and you are like pulverized into dust immediately.
And that, I think, I know it sounds really horrible,
but I just wanted to be as quick as possible
and I would like to just, they don't even have to cremate me.
They can just, you know, I'm already dust
because it would just be the most...
I'd not heard that one.
And I wouldn't know about it.
I would just be in traffic,
like checking my ways
when I'm going to get there,
and the answer is I'm getting there right now.
Don't know which way I'm going,
but I'm on my way.
But I hope no one else is injured
in my bridge collapse.
No one.
You're it.
You're so far.
Anyway, I really appreciate it.
You're wonderful.
You are so great to talk to.
Thank you so much, Kara.
Thank you.
One more thing before we go.
Want career advice from Kara Swisher.
Now is your chance.
We're doing a special.
special episode all about it and I want your questions. Send a video to On at Vox Media and you
might be featured. I can't wait to see what you've got. I'm really interested in people's
questions and I've got a lot of good advice as it turns out. Today's show was produced by Christian
Castro Roussel, Michelle Alloy, Catherine Millsop, Megan Bernie and Kaylin Lynch. Nishot Kerwa is
Vox Media's executive producer of podcasts. Special thanks to Madeline LaPlante, Duby and Julia
Sharp Levine. Our engineers are Fernando Arruda and Rick Kwan and
and our theme music is by trackademics.
If you're already following this show,
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from Podium Media, New York Magazine,
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We'll be back on Thursday with more.
