Page 7 - American Pie WATCH-ALONG

Episode Date: July 13, 2023

Jackie, Holden, and MJ are BACK with a watch-along that feels like WARM APPLE PIE! Page 7 and Wizard and the Bruiser are going on TOUR! Dates and links to tickets at lastpodcastnetwork.com  Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Hey, LPN fans, page 7 and Wizard and the Bruiser are going on tour. Yes, the Last Podcast Network presents the release of Butthole Cut Tour could be coming to your town. Holden, where are we going? July 11th will be in Oklahoma City, July 12th, Kansas City, Missouri, and finishing out in July 13th, St. Louis. Be there. MJ, where can we get tickets? For tickets, go to Last Podcast Network.com. Say it again.

That's Last Podcast Network.com. All right. All right. We have to go up top, guys. Yes, we are watching American Pie today. Bye, bye, Miss American Pie. And we're going to sing the entire song. We won't sing the entire song, but I do need to know.

There is a reason. This did start off because while we were watching High School musical, I did admit that I have never seen American Pie before. Right. So MJ and Holder were like, well, you got to see American Pie. We latched on. We haven't let it go. We latched.

We didn't think it was going to take, but we latched immediately. Right away. Strong suckle right away. My nipples are both pert and destroyed. And I need you to know that we, yes, we are aware that there is a lot of rough stuff in this movie. Oh, it's going to be about. I'm sure, yeah. The beauty of watching this again.

Let's see how much we've grown. Yes. It's not an, it wasn't. I think we knew probably, even in high school, that it was problematic then, but it was a whole problematic time. I don't know. We were swimming in the oceans of problematism. I would say it was the hit movie of the, it was like the perfect time for me. Let's set this scene a little bit.

1999, I was either, I don't know what time of the year it came out, but I was either a sophomore or a junior in high school. This was literally this movie could not have come out at a better time. It is my Porkies. I remember seeing it in the movie theater. came out in July, by the way. So this is actually weirdly perfect summer. Yeah, I was not yet a shithead, not still a boy. It will be almost exactly 24 years.

Nice. Wow. Since the release of this movie when this episode, it was released on July 9th, 1999. Holy shit. Beautiful time, pre-9-11. I mean, it was easier, simpler time. And everybody I knew. Simpler yet.

Much more races. Everyone I knew was flocking to the movie theater. I mean, same with like wild things and cruel intentions. Like it was this weird moment in movies where teens would like, as a whole group, we would all go and be horny together in a dark theater. Yeah. But in this case, it was funny. And I actually remember feeling like, wow, they're like really talking about things

that I felt like wasn't really talked about in movies at the time. And maybe I wouldn't have felt that way if this was. like had, if there was a big drought in between all of the porkies and Revenge of the Nerds and all those horny summer high school movies, right? There was this kind of like weird time in between where that wasn't happening. And then this movie dropped. I just remember it being such a cultural touchstone. Like, everybody had seen it.

Everybody, you know, and I think it was because of how people were having conversations about sex and things like that. And this was like finally acknowledging stuff about being a horny teenager that I hadn't really seen on a screen before. You know what I mean? I think that, yeah, I think all that's fair. I do think, and Jackie was like, should we not watch it because it'll be offensive? And we're like, oh, it's going to be offensive.

So this is like a gigantic content note to anybody who's going to be listening to this. If you don't want to sit down and watch American Pie with us, you don't have to. We will certainly talk through the entire thing and we'll hopefully be a fun episode regardless. This is not an endorsement. Eugene Levy. I don't think it's going to hold up. but it does have a great cast, and there's going to be parts of it that totally hold up, or at least have some sort of cultural relevance or salient.

It's going to be amazing to why I think I saw it once and I don't think I've seen it since. So it's going to be a roller coaster. It was also like the thing that launched the careers of Tara Reid, Jason Biggs, Sean William Scott of Dude Where's My Car Fame, and Natasha Leone as well. She's in American Pie. Yes, yeah. She's so late American wife. She's awesome.

Wow. And all these guys, I mean, for a shorter period of time, Allison Hanigan and Shannon Elizabeth, but this was such a huge, I don't know, this just really was like this turning point. Of course, Jennifer Coolidge is there. Of course, Jennifer Coolidge is like the ultimate milf and all this sort of thing. So it's Natasha Leon and Jennifer Coolidge, two women I want to not only be, but also have sex with.

Yeah. Yeah. All in this movie. Great. And everything that you hear. for the next hour and 35 minutes is going to probably destroy you psychologically. So you're going to have a great time. Yes.

And Minas Savari, yeah, this was like such a big deal. And I think introduced a lot of us to Eugene Levy for the first time, honestly, too. Certainly me. And he's great in it. I was, yeah, we were in middle school. I feel like I, quote, unquote, learned about sex from this movie, which is bad. Kind of, yeah. This was, you know, like I said, this was people having discussions about sex in a way that felt like really refreshing and profound.

in a pre-9-11, this holds up world. But yeah, I guess without further ado, shall we jump in? Let's jump. Let's do it. All right, I've got it all queued up. Let me know. I'll do the countdown, three, two, one.

And then what is the dumb word I have to say? Start. Start. You have to press it at the beginning of the word start. Of start. Okay, I got it. If you do want to watch along with us, it is on Peacock. It is also available to rent for like three bucks on Prime.

Prime will ask you a series of questions like, are you sure you want to rent to be a guy? Last chance to cancel it. You have to enter why you want to watch this movie at this time in your life. Like, it's very bizarre. This must be a mistake. Or you can just stream it on Peacock like I'm doing. Yeah. Not one question being asked. They're happy about it. They're just like, there's so many other movies that came out since that like really

kind of do. How about Juno? Maybe Juno? All right. Let's get into it. On three to one start. You ready? Getty. Three, two, one. Start.

It's always so nerve-wracking. I got the FBI warning going right now. F-E-I warning. We'll kind of, yeah, we'll try to say, well, it's a long FBI warning. They really want you to read it right now. That means we're not on the same page. Oh, really?

Out the gate. All right, interesting. Well, tell me when the universal thing pops up. It's going on right now. We're going to Universal right now. It's going on right now. It's the Universal running across the screen right now. All right, we're close.

Okay. Well, it's the same runtime. I guess we're watching maybe the... Are you hearing some sex noises? I'm hearing sex noises. Excellent. Oh, yeah. Great.

This was a crazy... I just remember we were all teenagers. We're all... We'll go into this theater on like a Friday night. And this is what we're like, whoa, I can't believe we're watching a... Guy jerk off to, by the way, the thing we all jerked off to, which was this weird, fucked up, almost a version of the dirty TV show,

television station you had to pay for. The scrambled channels. The scrambled channels. Coming in. Yep. I had a really weird, gross memory. Oh, my God, with the sock on the penis and everything. Yeah, I did learn a lot from this movie.

Totally. So he was 22 in this. Wow. Yeah, he does look young. I feel like he actually did a good job being like being like I'm a young high schooler who is really struggling. This did capture a very real fear for sure. Yes, my worst nightmare. I was literally about to say, but also the scramble TV stage.

I remember I went to my buddy's place and they had a big TV in this like wreck room and we stayed up all night just trying to see like a tit. This is craziness. Like so they just pulled the pillow off. his lap and there's the cock, his cocks in a sock clearly hard. It was like, whoa! This was like totally insane immediately. Yeah. It was definitely a very talked about opening scene.

Yeah. It is funny that, yeah, that was just like a, we had never really seen anything like that at the time, you know? Yeah. Natasha Leon, there's her name. Oh my God! It's got the great clueless thing, too, going on where you watch back and like what the hot boy is.

where you're like, I can't believe this was once considered hot. That's what the hot boys. So are they popular kids or are they not popular kids? Um, it was kind of like, it wasn't like your, yeah, we're the losers and they're the cool kids. They were kind of just like even. Middle of the road. Yeah.

It's kind of an ensemble cast representing different realms of the social world in the school. I would say Jason Biggs is a straight up like average kid. Like that's kind of his thing. He is just like a middling. struggling, average horny boy. And then the terror read, this storyline is the, is the like couple deciding whether or not to like lose their virginities to each other.

No, no, no, it's all about sex, Jackie. Come on, this is all, everything is revolving around the act of copulation or whatever. Whoa, Chris Klein, haven't thought about him in 25 years. Oh! Yeah. The L word is love, not lesbian.

I was so into Tara Reid in this movie. Ah, yes, the whole band camp thing. I was a member of marching band and I will say that we didn't, we weren't offended but it was annoying to have the band camp jokes because we did go to band camp. They all went to bank camp, but you guys were the horniest people in the school. 100%. Yes, that actually, you're right, Holden. It actually was like kind of positive representation of the band camp kids because they were really horny.

Yeah. You're right. You're right. I take it back. It was just like a real, every time I'd be like, well, we've got to go to band camp. Obviously, that didn't set you up for success. No. Socially.

Because then it was all about fucking the flute. This is, this will tell you a lot about me. He was my crush. What's his name again? Of course he was. That guy. Pinch, that guy. He was the rain.

Randy of American Pie. He's the Randy! Totally. Finch, totally forgot about him. Oh, and he's, oh, he's drinking coffee. Yeah, yeah, he's like the, well, he's the milf. He wants the, he's the one who wants the milf. Yeah, he's like obnoxious and pretentious, but again, in the name of fucking, one

thing that is nice about the movie is it's all the high school stereotypes, but they're all kind of united on a mission to fuck, if I remember correctly. Hell yeah. So it's not all about the, it's kind of. He's like the popular jock guy, but he's hanging out with the, you know what I mean? Yeah, they're all like in the same mix. Yeah, they're like on a quest almost. Yeah, yeah.

Oh, yeah. This is a beauty of, this is like Lord of the Rings. It's another side quest. Except a penis into a vagina. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. It's a side quest. Ooh, look at this hot dog place called dog.

Yeah. Okay. See, Jackie, it's got things for me. All right, it's for me. God, what was I even going to say? It's, oh yeah, did this introduce us to Milf, the concept of the MILF? I think it did. That was the first time I heard it.

I must have been something that people said in porn and stuff before. I got to look, I got to look this up. I mean, unless you watch the graduate. Oh, well, but they use the phrase Miltf. Right, not conceptually, but I think that the existence of the word Milt, unless it existed, like in porn or whatever before this, I think that mainstream use of Milt, this was the first. I'm looking at it. up.

Okay. Yes, Milf traces back to the early 90s, but was popularized by the 1990 comedy film American Pie. Okay. So it existed in parlance before American Pie,

but this was the first kind of mainstream... Yeah. We wouldn't have Milf money or... I don't think Pornhub would even be what it is without this movie. Okay, so this is a pivotal moment, Jay.

Yeah, here we go. This is why it's called Apple Pie. It's tough about what pussy feels like. Yeah. pussy feels like. Do you want to do what do you think he's going to do with a with maybe a pie later? I mean, I know what happens in the movie. I'm not like it's not like I've been living blind for 24 years. Oh my God. This soundtrack too is amazing. We're listening to blues traveler right now. Let me look up the American Pie soundtrack so we can go over some of the minutes. No, we're listening to Bear Naked Ladies, Bras. Oh, my bad. This is one week. My bad. I'm sure. I hope Blue's Traveler comes in later though. That would be nice. We've got Blink 182, Goldfinger. Goldfinger. I'm also really happy because I am drinking out of my Brats cup right now that says,

dump him on it. Nice. I'm drinking out of my Dorothy, my Golden Girls themed wine glass collection. So my Dorothy, though. I choose based on my general demeanor, which Golden Girl I'm going to drink out of. I am disturbingly sober, but I got to figure out exactly. exactly how to time the edible so that I can continue to talk and be, you know, with it for this recording. Do it now.

But also can't have a fully sober mind to watch American Pie 1. No, you can't. And then there was this guy. There was this guy. Yeah. Did you like him, MJ? Yeah, I was going to say. I did not.

No, no, I did not like this guy. Are you like me? Did I ask you that? No, no, it's fair. I feel like there was, I was friends with several people. who were, like, told that they looked like this guy. You know? This guy was, like, the my friends group, you know,

even though I also was, like, a band camp kid. So I was, I oscillated between different groups. But the, like, pretentious kid who drinks the coffee and wants to fuck the milk also was kind of, like, I had a crush on him slash also slightly identified with him, you know, the high schooler who thinks that they're, like, better than everybody and, like, drinks coffee and stuff. Right.

And then, of course, that was Shannon Elizabeth, and she did become absurdly popular with the boys after this movie, of course. She's the one-time of band-camp girl? No, no, she's the, this chick. Oh, that chick, right.

That he's trying to talk to. Right, Allison, what's her name is the one-time of fan-camp girl? Yeah. I mean, it had these honest moments. I mean, I remember having this awful situation trying to walk up to a girl to party. I mean...

It obviously did, ring true for so many people, right? Like, obviously, it was a time when you could just make a blockbuster movie and it didn't have to be emotionally honest for it to be popular. But I do think that the movie was resonant for some reason. Oh, yeah. It's interesting to rewatch it and feel like, yeah, it has these moments. That opening scene was immediately everyone brought that, it brought the fucking house down.

Like, because we've, especially got, I mean, this is definitely made more for guys, I think, than ladies, but yeah. That moment of like, I don't know about the sock on the penis or whatever, but other than that, you know, but those all talk a lot, talking about jerking off into socks. But yeah, just the whole part of the parents walking in and looking at trying to discern the scramble and all that good stuff. Yes, the band kids travel at a squad.

It's true. It's true. It's true. It's true. Yeah, always. No, Stifler. Oh, let them all. Oh, no.

Stiffler doesn't let them in. The back when nerds were nerds and we let them know they were, we didn't deal with all this like whatever. kind of wishy-wash. No, the nerds go over there, away from the party, please. I don't know. My high school,

I always actually thought that some of the, like, obviously there was like a massive amount of bullying and stuff, but also I always thought that sometimes the groups were a little bit overplayed in movies. Like, I was a band camp kid

and a theater kid, but also... Yes, this is where we asked the girl to suck his dick back going, suck me beautiful. Sorry, continue MJ. I just needed to point out suck me beautiful. No, that's what we're here for.

No, just I wonder if other people, like I feel like sometimes the click stuff of high school, it obviously is true, it rings true for a reason, but sometimes I think it's a little bit overblown. And there was like a lot of intermingling in my high school,

that you could be a band kid or a theater kid and if we showed up to a popular kid party, which we never did. But I think if we had, it would have been fine. Yeah, totally. I think it would have been fine. Well, they won't they?

Did you ever hold up in one of the bed, rooms at a party like this? I was way too lame. Yeah, exactly. Fucking lame, dude. This is the thing. I was too young and too lame for this to ever, any of this to ever happen to me.

I never did any of this. But also, I was in middle school and this came out. So it was just all aspirational, you know? Yeah, yeah. For me, I was like, I was in this. I was like living this life. And I, and usually like, movies at the time, like, can't hardly wait and stuff like that.

I'd always just be like, this is bullshit. I mean, even clueless I liked, but I was like, this isn't like real. You know what I mean? This movie I was like, wow, this is really what it's kind of like to be horny to the throat of me. Horniness rising up from my genitals up in the,

I can feel it in my throat. Suck me beautiful. Suck me beautiful. Sean William Scott is really funny in this movie. I think that he probably, unfortunately got just typecast as like, I think he became so equated with Stifler that it was impossible to see him as anybody else.

Uh-huh, totally. Yeah, he just became Stifler. Guy getting a blowjob. Yeah. You know what I mean? Was very, very big deal. He's gonna drink it. No.

Oh, yeah. I forgot about how much cum consumption there is. Wait, he came in the beach. beer? Yeah, he shot his load and the beer. Why? And then just put it on the mantle. You know, got to put it somewhere. He's just like, there's a cup. And he just jerked off to it. I've got God's well in my mouth.

Well, she was like, let me know when. Terra Reid was like, let me know when. And then she said, because he didn't want it, she wanted to take the load. You know what I mean? Just really, for 1999, because even like, I don't know, I'd have to go back and why. Well, Porkies is a crazy movie. Like, Porkies is you think is like this. I've never seen Porky's. So the thing with Porky's that's nuts is there's like, it's kind of like, um, Fast Times-Richmont High where you think it's going to be one kind of movie. And then there's all these like weird story beats or like dirty dancing with the abortion stuff. There's like these weird, like heavy story beats that just got to come out of nowhere. And you're like, what? And like, I thought there's just like a pure, because this movie is just a pure teenage sex comedy period. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. just how wide open his mouth was.

I'm just, oh, yeah. Well, don't worry, he's about to take a sip a load. Yeah, because this is just the same exact structure as every teen movie, but it was just ten times hornier. I think that's what, right? That's just the thing that's out of the place. Yeah, oh, so much more. And just really, but also really acknowledge sex in this way

that you just weren't seeing a lot. Like even the Tara Reid couple, like deciding whether or not they're going to lose their virginity before they go off to each other before they go off to college or I mean obviously like the quiet shy girl being like a freak you know what I mean like just all sorts of stuff and also can you imagine this part of this movie everybody in the theater's going ready's about to take a super oh you know what I mean how would you know it's low I know he wouldn't know it's load he doesn't know he might get sick later but uh uh uh oh he puke down her. Natasha Leone. A lover. Yeah, she's great. She's like even, she's even her like in this, in 1999.

Oh, man. And but I'm a cheerleader was the same year. Because I was in love with but I'm a cheerleader. Hell yeah, yeah. I was going to say, are we about to pass the Bechdel test, but they are just talking to each other about men, so maybe we're not going to pass the Bechell test. Not at all. Now they are two women talking to each other, so there's that.

That's nice. Yeah, no way we're going to pass it in this movie. This is all about relationships and none of them gay. So, Jackie, you are going to love the Stifler's mom stuff. I mean, and this again, really, not just Eugene Levy, but this introduced so many people to Jennifer Coolidge. Like, she kills it in this movie. By the way, I'm going to throw this out there.

Nothing at all problematic so far. Yeah, so far, but it's only been 15 minutes. I mean, they're definitely going to secretly film Chan Elizabeth masturbating. I was going to say, at first I was nervous there was going to be like really casual racism, which I'm probably still nervous about. But now I'm realizing that I'm actually nervous about like rape culture stuff. And I didn't even realize that until we started watching. And now I realize.

But I think it might only be that moment. Because if you notice actually this whole time like Geyser proposition for sex. Well, doesn't you have sex with a minor? Oh, cool. Jennifer Coolidge, just Stifler's mom. Oh, yeah. Well, I don't know how old he's supposed to be. Yeah, she has sex with the minor.

That's, yeah. That's a team. Pretty problem. That too. But he's an old soul. He's drinking. He's drinking coffee, Jackie. He's a old soul.

He likes espresso. I mean, it's different. No, but so far there hasn't been any really bad, like there hasn't been any Revenge of the nerd stuff yet from Matt about, about the boys about the girls. But it's going to be the Shann Elizabeth thing for sure. and it's going to be the, yeah, obviously, yeah, I didn't even think about the, do you know why I didn't think about Jennifer College

fucking the minor being a thing? Because definitely at this time, especially, it was cool when a lady teacher fucked a boy student. We talk about this even with Riverdale in the first season of Riverdale, there's a plot line that Archie's having sex with a teacher or at least like hooking up with a teacher. And like, that wasn't that long ago.

And it was presented, definitely presented as sexy, like, and a little bit bad, but mostly sexy. And yeah, that was like in the modern times in a way that this movie isn't. These pants. The nerd got some action. Yeah, confidence. Sherman.

Man, look at those chinkos. And the capri pants on the late, on the girl, too, is very this time period. Honestly, the wardrobeing is, like, his shirt, the nerd girl, the nerd boy, like bowling shirt or whatever from the late night is very real, extremely real. extremely real. We were doing the wild thing all night.

Yeah, I mean, this is really just like the whole plot of this movie is like boys trying to lose their virginity. Yeah. I didn't feel this pressure to lose my virginity. Like, do you think that that is like, like a difference of gender at that time period? Like, I didn't feel the same. Maybe ache. I definitely felt like really behind. But I also, again, didn't really like.

didn't really like even make out with a girl till, yeah, sophomore college. So I felt very just in general behind. Sex was like just so, so far away and alien to me that, like, I couldn't even conceive it. I think I was also kind of afraid of sex at this point. Like just, yeah, just the whole thing. I was just so, you know, it was totally out of my league, orbit, whatever. I related much more to never been kissed, which was like, you know, about a girl who makes it. Another upsetting one, yeah.

Yeah, also about an adult fucking, an adult who thinks he's fucking a teenager, but she's not a teenager. But she's not a teenager. So I definitely was afraid, I was very afraid of the idea of like never losing my virginity, but also I wasn't like, I've got to make it happen. I agree with Hold that it was more like, I was like, I was like never going to have a girlfriend. Like I'm just like every time I'm in a like, I kept like chased after girls and then they'd end up dating like my friend. and then it would get awkward because I have a problem with my friend. That happened a lot. I didn't chase anybody.

I was too shy to even chase anybody. But I yearned. I silently yearned after people. Aw. Yeah. All right, here we go. This is the mission statement of the movie. Yeah, this is the inciting incident.

Whatever you want to call it. But, like, boys, we're trying to lose their virginity as teenagers. And this was a whole thing. And again, it wasn't really something that we saw in a lot of stuff in, like, comedies and stuff or anything, you know? It's actually a little bit weird to watch this in the context of, like, how much discourse there is now about incels and, like, this idea that so many young men feel like they have, like, a right to sex. Kind of literally the plot of this movie. But it doesn't, but it doesn't feel sinister in this movie the way that it has ended up being sinister in real life. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. They only have three weeks. Yeah. Yeah, they only have three weeks. It is a great storytelling vehicle, for sure. Yeah. All right. Very clear.

Such a good song. It's a great song. Great karaoke song, by the way. Oh, yeah? This is a killer karaoke song. Because it's got you just, everyone wants to sing along to it. OG dating app. No one ever chooses it.

Yeah. So, yeah, he's on the computer. This is very, like, clueless. Well, this establishes the web camera remote thing that they're going to use to film Shan Elizabeth, Masterb. That's her name, right? Chan Elizabeth, right, masturbating. I don't remember the scene you're talking about.

Oh, really? Yeah. That was where the tits were. That was a pivotal. That's why he remembers. So you didn't fast forward to that part of the Blockbuster tape. like over and over again. No, I was like trying to learn about penises from the, you know, from this movie.

I know, I know. But yeah, this is crazy. E-date. We make love happen. This is a dating website. So, you know, internet's been established, but very rudimentary. Kind of reminds me of the clueless getting dressed thing. That's kind of the, you know, to be.

Happy that they all bought condoms. Happy that they all are coming in with their own condoms. I feel that that is something that is. adverse to what happened when you were a teenager. So far, you know, I mean, they've only said the N-word like, what, twice too? So, I mean, so far it's been really, really not bad.

There's been no end words yet. There's no slurs. No bad gay F slur yet? No bad gay F slur yet. Yeah. So many things I forgot exactly why I was worried going in, but I knew I was. But at least I remember this movie has like good intentions.

I think that you catch that. It like tricks you into thinking it's going to be this like really like over the top, you know, raunchy thing. And at the end of the day, like one of the biggest storylines is two, you know, people who've been in a relationship for a while making the conscious decision to like lose their virginity to each other in a very like. And communicating with each other about it. That actually what is modeled really nicely.

And that really was kind of the, they kind of fool you into enjoying kind of a more of a morality tale around that. Is Natasha Leone trying to teach that guy about how to give her an orgasm? Just saying that like if you want her to fuck you, you got to give her an orgasm first. Ah. Okay. Well,

what did God do this? I wonder if there's any guys going down on girls in this movie. Ha! Is that naive? Yeah, highly doubt it. Maybe the teens or whatever. By the way, they made kind of a gay joke just then. I think they did make kind of a gay joke just then.

Maybe. Yeah, get your balls reattached. Yeah. Because choir is gay. Gay, gay. We were in the high, high season of choir is gay. Yes. It was a decade of choir is gay.

I was very not, not going anywhere near choir at this point. Theater is gay too, Holden. Sure. Theater was gay. Prants and frolic upon the stage. Band was gay. He's making the point that I knew. The only way for me as a non-year.

non-athlet to get close to female women was to do the school play. Yeah. That was the only way because I was like, I got to get in there too and like actually have conversations. I can't just like make the football touchdown and then, you know, whatever, go on the date, whatever, right? I had to like, oh, this is so funny. He's trying to, he's checking out the condom.

Eugene and Leffey is so good. He's so funny in this. I mean, just a nightmare. So your father wasn't buying you porn, Holden? No, I've told this story many times. It gets darker as the years go on. Both of my parents had the sex talk with me over a different Woody Allen movie. For my dad, it was everything you ever want to know about sex.

We're afraid to ask. He just put it on and said, ask me any questions if you have them. And for my mom, it was Mighty Aphrodite. And yet again, she was like, if you have any questions. I remember at one point, she was like, because Mirossovini made a joke about a blowjob. and she was like, do you know what a blowjob is, son? And I was just like, yeah. How old were you?

And I didn't know what it was. I don't know. I don't know. I mean, I was, you know, nah, maybe a little, maybe a little old. I feel like a little older. But I still didn't know what it was. But I definitely lied instead I knew what it was.

Honestly, I definitely knew that whatever it was. Show me a movie. Don't talk to me. I mean, really? I was going to say, I think it's hilarious. Your parents were like, what if I could take myself completely out of the equation? Yeah, well, they also,

honestly, what was actually, what was actually... Ugh. It's so funny that we're having this conversation while watching Eugene Levy look at porn with his son in this movie. So funny.

I... Because of how awkward, I'm not saying this, if I have children, I'm definitely going to be, this is going to be not something that is not allowed to be discussed like it was in my home,

but we did have the very, I had a very uncomfortable conversation with my mother. Yeah, I don't know if it's like, but it's not really, what I wanted, you know, back then even. I will say that... Yeah, I also tell this story a lot.

The thing that happened that was actually really good for me, it finds the condoms. The thing that was really good for me was this at Unitarian Church. There was a program there for when we hit a certain age where it was like every Sunday for, I forget how long, maybe a couple months. He's got the condom stuck to his bottom. It's very comical. It was this sex ed class, essentially, but like way better than like the shit I was learning at school.

It was like, you know, how to how to put a condom on, but also like we'd watch a slideshow of like different like sex positions and like they taught us about masturbation and they taught us about, you know. And one of the cool ones was there was a thing they did that I thought was really cool where you all the guys and all the girls got on opposite sides of the rooms of the room. and all the guys would write anonymous questions, put them in a hat, and the girls do the same on a separate hat, and then they'd switch them, and they just go through and ask each collective group, like, a question, you know, anonymous questions.

You know what I mean? Yeah, that's pretty good. It's so, the timing, especially with a parent sex talk is so hard, because you don't, obviously you don't. What kid wants to talk about that with their parent? By the time you're a teenager, you don't want that from your parents.

I think you need someone else to, you know, maybe a program like that would be cool. I mean, honestly, at this point, though, I didn't have the internet that this generation has. They're all going to learn, not only going to learn about that, but they're going to be like, oh, and then you can shit in a, you know, circus magician's mouth or whatever. You know what I mean?

And all this kind of stuff. So Finch has started a rumor that he has a big D. Yes. In an effort to get himself a good date for Pratt. There you go. If there's a trick to make her orgasm. At least they're talking about... Yeah.

By the way, wait, who is that? He's famous. Is that Casey Affleck? I think it's Casey Affleck. Yeah. The Bible, yes. I forgot about it. There's a secret book.

I love this. It's hidden in the library. Mm-hmm. Whoa. It's like a burn book, but for sex. But for, yeah, just sex advice. Oh, my God, I've died to have one of those. I want one now.

It's totally like Neverending story designed too on the book and everything. It's so funny. Just the knowledge. But again, Chris Klein has it right. I mean, like, in theater,

we were all having sex with each other. Like, if you go towards where, like, that you have like a better chance, I think that he's the smartest one. Yeah. Totally. I don't know about the scatting, though. Well, you know, he's no Kim Cotrol, but.

He got lost in the song. Wow, what do we watch high school musical? I get we to watch Camp Rock. Thank God. We're watching High School music. I would rather watch a problematic movie than watch more high school musical. It's so good. You like the third one.

We did it. We did all three weeks. We bet on it and we did it. Camp Rock right in now to Jackie and Empt. to demanding a camp rock watch a lot. I was about to say there's no more high school musical that we can watch, but I know that's not true. There's a bunch of more.

High school, musical, the series, the musical. We can watch Olivia Rodrigo pre-sour. You know, I think that'd be... Oh, I'm busy. Fascinating, though. I think it'd be a little interesting. Can't. Interesting, the children sing and all that.

Oh, lacrosse. He's got the lacrosse. That resonated with me as well. I was like, yeah, dude, fuck a lacrosse, bro. Do you feel seen, Holden? A little bit. I definitely felt seen watching this, which was weird because I usually didn't like the, like,

teen movie that ever, like I said, like, I want to rewatch it now because I think I like it way more now. But Can't Hardly Wait, like pissed me off. Like, I hate it. But I did like Clueless, I will say. I don't remember if Can't Hardly Wait holds up. That's another one I think I saw once.

I think it does. Yeah. It's great. Well, and also, it's such a document of like that time in your, in our child. It's 13 years. I would love to rewatch all of those ones. I'd rewatch fucking she's all that.

Yes. Yeah, she's all that. I mean, Clueless I rewatch every few years just because you got to. I feel like it's a foundational text, you know. But it's a lot of those other ones. They came into my life and they left just as quickly, you know? I used to live right next to the circus liquor sign that was in Clueless. So when I first moved over there, I watched Clueless because I was so excited because I was like,

I'm in the dirty, dangerous part of L.A. Everywhere in L.A. takes 20 minutes. Honestly, it does. If there's no traffic, it really does. You can get anywhere in L.A. in 20 minutes. It's kind of right. Oh, it's a pie. What's he going to do?

Why would you do this with a pie? Like, get a slice of pie and stick your dick in it. Also, the crust would be so, like, just, yeah. So you never tried it, is what you're saying. No, I, um. have you stuck the fingers in it like this? No, I kind of knew that this wasn't real. This was like actually not a thing.

And it wouldn't, in a put vagina does, in no way feels like the insides of an apple pie, by the way. It certainly does not. But not on any level. No. Yeah. I mean, this is obviously really stupid. And I do feel like I remember like the sheer horniness of teenagers at the time. and being like, it felt like, yeah, I could imagine somebody trying this.

Why would you lay on the kitchen island that you take it to the bathroom? You take it to the bathroom or something. Take it to your room. Take it anywhere else. Oh, my God. It's so great. This is just a lot of, oh, in the movie theater. Honestly, great dad.

We'll just tell your mom we ate it all. That's the dad looking out, you know? Yeah. Know your enemy pictures of vibrators. and stuff, that has certainly changed. Yes. Know your enemy. That you're competing with the vibrator

or not using it as a sort of assistance. I feel like it's not that the apple pie scene rings true. It's that the rumors about what kids did. I feel like it rang true as a rumor. Rainbow Party was the biggest one. Like how ridiculous is, that wouldn't even work. That doesn't even make any sense. Yes.

I think it wasn't that you're like, oh yeah, somebody would do that. But it's a story you would hear about in high school. that was probably made up, but that would definitely circulate. I feel it was rumors that, like, parents would circulate. It wouldn't even, like, come from the kids. Right, right. Rainbow Party was, by the way, if you weren't aware, a party where all the girls

wear different colored lipsticks from each other and the guys try to see how many colors they can get on that. Absolutely. Would not, anybody who invented that idea. Not how it has never gotten a blowjob or given a blowout. Yeah, like, that would not even on any, it would just be like, your penis would just be like sludgy looking or so I don't even know what it would look like also it goes away because you're sucking the dick so you're sucking the dick so yeah yeah yeah would get off the dick yeah

yeah I mean I that right it's based on like the 80s movie thing of like after you've made out you have lipstick on your cheeks but like yeah you don't just like put your lips around a dick one time and then leave you know what was this this was before American beauty right I believe American Beauty was 2000. Yeah. Let me check. American Pie, American Beauty. Yeah, but she really had a run, didn't she?

No, American Beauty was also 1999. Wow. Yeah, this was her huge breakout year. Wow, what a year. For all Savini. Man, her and Natasha Leone both had huge 99s. Huge years. Huge years.

Although I guess but I'm a cheerleader is not as big as I thought it was just because I was obsessed with it. It wasn't, but it was still, you know, it's a big deal to a lot of people. Like, Lexi loves that movie too. It was huge for me. I remember it being, like, well-reviewed and stuff. Like, I remember seeing it on, like,

Siskel and Ebert and stuff like that. Oh, I remember when I used to watch Siskel and Ebert, too. I loved it. I loved it. That was such a score when I was like, oh, what's on right now? Oh, Stifler. Wait until she leaves.

But Chris Kline's like, no, I'm a good guy. I'm not going to do that. Yeah, but if he was a good guy, he would say something at that point. He was complaisant. Yeah, well, this was a thing I dealt with. All the jocks pertaining to be like real sweet guys to the ladies and then bullying me as soon as they walked away. You know what I mean? It drove me fucking crazy.

Why is she mad at him? Oh, see, there you go. Oh, hey. Yeah. All right. Yeah, so he's eating her box or whatever using the knowledge from the book. Good for him. He's got the book under the bed, pulling it out, looking at the notes.

Yeah, yeah. It's just too bad. So we got representation on this. Yeah, for sure. What's too bad, Jackie? Yeah. That, like, it's not put into young people to, like, ask her if she likes it.

Why do you ask her what she wants you to do? Like, you know, it is, that's still something that is still kind of new, you know? Oh, my God. The dad's walking up the stairs. Okay, she screamed I'm coming and the dad turned around because he thought that she meant coming down for dinner. That was a close call. I love him. He's so funny.

Yeah, he is really, really, really. He's the only one communicating. Yeah, he's the only way is actually communicating. He's actually making an effort to... But this, he is the, he's so naturally funny as the incredibly awkward dad navigating that. Yeah, it's so good. I mean, he's basically the same character as he is in Schitt's Creek, right? Like, isn't it fair to say that's like just the same?

Pretty much. Except not as successful. Yeah, not as rich. Right. I mean, it's kind of, actually, I'd say it's more him in, uh, best in show. But Eugene Levy's kind of always kind of gee Eugene Levy, you know. He's so funny. Kiss at the end of the rainbow.

Man, I used to just listen to the soundtrack of that. Oh, no, that's Mighty Wind. Mighty Wind, yeah. But that's when you said this is Eugene Levy's breakout in my head, I was like, no, but Waiting for Guffman came out before this. I was like, Jackie, you were a lame theater kid that loved waiting for Guffman. That's not the normal thing everybody was obsessed. I will say, I didn't say it was breaking up.

it was his, it was a movie that introduced him to this whole generation. For sure. Oh yeah. That's what I'm saying. I was a loser. Yeah. You were right. This was his like, this was his second wave of, you know, I think success in like all of our parents were already big fans from, you know, SCTV era and all that stuff. Yeah. Like I remember the commercials for American Pie even were humiliating to watch when they came on, you know, if you're watching TV with your parents. But my parents were like, Oh my God, Eugene Levy is so funny, you know, because they liked SCTV and stuff. Is he going to do it? Oh, yeah, I love this, that Finch always goes home to take a shit.

That also rang very true. Yeah, isn't the thing that he's maybe gay and it ends up he just likes older women? I don't remember. Maybe not. Maybe he's got a reputation as being a Lafario. He is starting that reputation himself. Mm-hmm. But I don't remember if he's, you know, queer.

I don't know if we call it queer coded when it was the thing of like, if you weren't a certain type of guy in high school, everyone just called you gay. I guess that's not the same thing as being queer coded. Wait a second. She's an exchange student? Yes, she's a foreign exchange student. Why?

It's even more kind of predator. I don't know. Because it's, that's the, because that was such a touchstone of horniness in school, like the foreign exchange student or the new girl. I mean, I understand why. Why is Shannon Elizabeth playing it? I have no.

I mean, who knows? Okay, so this is the setup for them filming her. Which, by the way, I gotta remember how this goes down because why does she just randomly decide to fucking flick the bean anyways, like, in his room? Because they are giving the girls some level of, like, complexity and interiority. I will say, girls can be horny to.

Girls can be horny too. That Tara Reade scene, I totally forgot about that. That's actually a really cool scene that I was really into when I was younger, by the way. How old is she in this? She looks so young. I'm just going to assume their teenagers and not get hotted out by any of this, but.

I think that's a good call. Yeah. I mean, they're so young, though. I have a hard time with, you know, at this point. There you go. At this point, though, I mean, anybody like, you know. Under 26 is off limits. Under 26.

Yeah, I know. I couldn't even imagine. Like they look like children to me. Eastern Europe. Sean Williams-Scott, I'll bet he's got to be like 30 in this movie, right? He has an old guy energy. Why is she going to be naked? Because she's changing at his house.

Because she has to... Why does she need to change? He's 23, by the way. Sean Williams. Cool. Really? He's only 23. Wow.

Wow. I was wrong. All right. And here we go. Here's the part that's bad. Where all the boys are coaching him about why he should photograph her. Yeah. House Elite without her consent.

This is one of the bigger crimes we get in the baggage watch along is filming people without their consent. Really? That happens frequently in baggage. 2011, filmed in 2011. Yeah. Yeah, there are very funny things that are obvious, really intense crimes today that people are like,

yeah, you know, I'm filmed right, and tell her about it. Yeah, we got to get a smoking solo. Just go look at a paper bag. It's the plastic bag floating. It's the best beautiful thing you've ever seen. Oh my God, the most beautiful thing she's ever seen! I still say that if I see a plastic bag anywhere in LA.

I'll always say it. Wow, it's the most beautiful thing I'll just say it randomly. I do the same thing. These are our dad jokes. Like, this is what we're going to annoy our children with. Netbot email. So they're not even trying, are they like, Is it like actual pre-AOL or is it just they don't want to get the copyright?

No, we had, we had aOL. We had a-o-all. Yeah, right? God, I'm dying to know what my, I'm still trying to figure out what my old, uh, username was. I don't remember. No. Well, flower power power 98 judges you. So does Crapty Bernard, Holden.

Crafty Bernard is hilariously like That's M.J. Flower Power 98 is like not Jackie at all. Like in the late 90s when the 70s came back and everything was like so that's why. The Brady Bunch movies. That's why. I'm not surprised at all by Flower Power 98.

I can totally see it. I am. That is so just does not say. So funny. But then I was evil. Middle school I changed it to Evil Duck 59. There you go. 10, 59, like 69, but not 69.

Wow, Jackie, you're so random. I know, so random. It's like nobody knew what I was doing. This is so weird. Again, why is she changing in his room? What was the idea of that? She just needs a room to change in. Yeah, I don't know.

And also, I'm so sad that the nice guy who wants to give Tara Reid an orgasm is also watching her. I want him to be the nice guy. They're all in on it. Yeah, but at the same time, he's only giving her an orgasm too. get P and V. Like that's just trying to fuck. He's not an angel. He's not an angel.

Also, yes, I did miss why she is getting changed in his room. I think it was that she was coming from a sport. We know sport. That it's just such a specific. I have to change. Whoa.

Yeah. Like, change in the bathroom. It's just such a crazy. Yeah, there you go. Full. By the way, this is a big deal. Getting full tits and a horny. I can't even imagine Holden changing in your bedroom.

And same with you, MJ, even though we share hotel rooms, I would never be like, can I change real quick and go into your personal, your actual bedroom? By the way, is it feel fun like, like watching a scene that I definitely jerked off to. And yes, that also includes the cuts to the boys being horny. Are you hot right now? Are you hard? I'm having memory nostalgia explosions

just defiling myself With my special soap cup Yeah Oh that's why And she finds the porn and it turns her on But she's just sitting there with her clothes off Yeah I know Why would you just sit there with no clothes

Oh yeah Where is he supposed to be right now Just downstairs like patiently waiting This is such a funny like late 90s version of It's not a late 90s version of feminism But it shows you where we are to be like, they think she's going to find porn and leave and be offended.

She finds porn and she likes it. And that's like really like a huge, like a huge, you know, shock or whatever. Right. And this is very bad. Yeah. This was the part we knew was going to not. In fact, I'm just so shocked that up until now,

nothing near as bad has happened. I can't believe that also. I will say if I saw a woman masturbating in my bed when I was 16, 17 years old, I would have, like, gotten off on thinking about that for, like, 10 years. For months and months, yeah, just forever. Yep, agree.

At that age? Definitely. I would have lost my fucking mind. That's the thing I appreciate about the movie. It really does, I feel like it's impossible to really convey how mindlessly horny you are at that age. And I really do think that this movie captures that with some.

Well, because you can't control yourself. You can barely control your hormones. I have a memory. I was like walking with a two friends. One was a girl. And I forget how it came up. We were talking about like I hadn't gotten a blowjob. We were talking about who had gotten blow jobs before, whatever. And she literally was like, I'll come over give you a blow job. And I was like, what? And I think I was just, again, I was like just really, you know, I think afraid of like crossing into the great beyond of being an adult who has sex and stuff. So I don't, I think I shied from it. But I still think about that today. I'm like, why didn't. Why didn't. I pass up that blowjob? Did you like run home and... I just feel like... Seriously masturbate. I definitely, yeah.

Oh my God. What? It didn't just go to them. It went to everybody in the high school. Oh, yeah. That's right. That's right. Think of how hard their lives would be fucking over today.

Yeah, totally. Wow. That does. That hits very differently. Or at least they would at least be suspended from school. Like, they would least be, or hopefully, most likely expelled,

I would assume. I think that the reason, honestly, not to put on my MJ hat, but I think the reason they make her foreign is because she doesn't seem like a real person. You know, if they did this to Tara Reid, it would be more devastating. But she's just kind of a caricature.

You know, she's just like a funny Russian girl or whatever. Yeah. Yeah, she's a prop for all these men's needs. The other girls do get to be kind of human a little bit, you know, but she's not. You're masturbating in his room. it's completely inappropriate. Shame on him.

This is, you know, just what a fantasy for a boy. This is before we had porn or, you know, at easy access. So now you can watch this scenario, copied and pasted about 30,000 times on X videos or whatever. But also this music.

But it's also interesting that that's how they dealt with it. Like she wasn't upset about him just walking in. You know what I mean? Right. She like. Well, I think that's the foreign exchange student thing. I think that's the thing.

She's a sex bot, right? It's still true that that Europeans are just a lot more sexually, you know, open or whatever. She's yawning. That child. I know, the 10-year-old brother or whatever watching is. I know. It's so, especially if you're trying to blast one, you know what I mean? Well, you're not, I mean, I don't think he's blast one.

at this point you're not. Well, at this point, no, no, I'm saying, uh, me as a boy masturbating to this part of, even though by this part, you're not drinking off. She's, well, she's still showing some tit. But yeah, she literally became the ultimate, like, just for a little while there. She just was sex.

It was just like for so many people in my generation, it was just like she was the ideation of. Where is this monkey? Why? Where did the monkey? come from. Yeah, I'm so torn now. Maybe I'm taking back what I said before about them making her totally two-dimensional

because they are making her like more sexually confident than any of the other people. Totally. I kind of trying to give her agency, but also she's not really a real person. I feel like my mind is blown. We're riveted right now because she's like, come to the bed now. Why is that boy there? Get the child out of that room. And then he, oh, that's, this was all.

also premature ejaculation, which was something we hadn't, kind of hadn't seen lampooned yet in a thing. And that was such a big in-jokes thing. I forgot, I was like mad at this part. That it's the, it's 24 years ago. And it's like, well, just because you came doesn't mean you can't make her come. Yeah, it's just over at that point. Oh, well, he already came, so I guess it's done.

That's not true. And the other part of that, too, for the guy is at that age, you're back in business about 15 minutes, man. That was just the little intro. Yeah, if you just ate her out, you could probably still have sex with her. He's re-engaging. Does he come again? I forget.

Does he not, does he, I think he nuts again prematurely, right? Maybe not. Oh, yeah, I think you're right. Holden. Yeah, the whole thing about the pussy being shaved. She just said shaved is the expression. That was such a big, crazy thing. I remember even my friend being like, his friend was dating this really hot chick.

And he was like, and she's totally shaved, man. Like, it was like so, you know what I mean? It was like. Yeah. And then he nuts again. Oh, yeah, he nuts again. That's so funny. That is pretty funny.

The group of girls watching and saying again is kind of fun. Yes. Yeah, yeah. Again? Wow. I have, I feel like I wanted, I have, I don't know how to process that scene. I, there are definitely some really enjoyable things about it, but also the entire premise is fucked up, but it was like not as bad as I thought it would be.

The whole premise is terrible. I guess they, and they don't even go into the part where like in real life you would, it would ruin your life if you were that girl. You know what I mean? And I don't even think they acknowledge, they just are like, she's fine with it. European. Right, right. They just make her like unslut-chamable because she's European, you know. Yeah, exactly. She's like, she doesn't care. Playing the long game. I was definitely playing that game. The choir practice storyline, long game myself. But I didn't look like him or was good at sports or anything like that. You know what I mean? So I, that long game, still playing that long game was very long. That's an extra long game. Now I'm checking out. They're like, how are your kids? How's your husband? You know what I mean? Just waiting. Just in case.

Just in case. Yeah, the pre-nut, that again was such a huge. Like, I can't believe they're going there. This is crazy. Yeah, it sounds like there was a lot of sex things about boys that boys saw for the first time in this movie. And I think maybe that's why it was so... Icon.

Yes, huge. Yeah, yeah. And a lot of, you know, and it sparked discourse a little bit with between the... the gender lines a little bit, that sort of stuff. You fucking band camp idiots, dude. Band camp

coming in for the win. Again, just like choir practice. Fuck the band people. But I mean, it's, yeah, I mean, where they take the band camp girl storyline though is, and it was so true. Like, I guess she also does get to be a girl with sexual agency

though, because she does proudly. All of the women are way more sexually, like, in touch and with it than literally all of the men pretty much. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Oh, I bet that sub place is really good. This weird feeling has come back to me, too, of being so upset with him in this movie for nut and twice and not actually, like, getting with journalism. Even though it's like, that's the point. It's a comedy movie. And I'm just, like, mad.

I'm just like, like, ain't. I was just like, you were in. you had it. You had the whole thing. And right there. I mean, at the same time, he's probably happy that everyone didn't watch him lose his virginity.

I mean, you know. It's not like he was going to be any good at it. Right. This is beautiful. This whole part is like so dry. I guess they needed that though. We had to cool down a little bit. You know what I mean?

Yeah. We were so, that Chan Elizabeth part because no one had any, by the way, no one ever in a million years was like, wow, that's really fucked up that they did that. In a million years back in 1989 with teenagers, right? So I just remember that was that was the scene. Everyone was like waiting to get to like with bated breath. You know what I mean?

That was like such the high point. And where are we in the movie? Yeah, we're like half or well over halfway through that. That was like the, you got to get to the crazy naked. You know what I mean? Yeah. I wonder, did like people in their 20s and 30s see this movie the way that, you know what I mean? Like how we, when we watch Riverdale, we're like, it's weird that we're watching something that's ostensibly made for teenagers, but really we kind of know it's made for millennials.

And I wonder, because this truly does seem to be made for teenagers in a way that if you like saw it and you were like 30, it would be a little. It would be weird. If you went out to see this movie in the theater and you're as like a middle age person or whatever, it'd be weird. You know, we go to movie. Like, we're not, we are now the age where we could have been like, this is a popular movie. We could go see it. I'll go see it.

Weird to be 37 and watching this movie in the theater with a bunch of teenagers, like rooting for Jason Biggs, you know. Oh, yeah. And then he's not. Oh, yeah. Scars healed really well. Oh, because. Yeah, the rumor.

Yeah. Oh, right. And she's, okay. Gotcha. And then she's indefinery. Dodge Leonie's into Finch. Also, props to this relationship for being like a platonic relationship

between a boy and a girl, that's fun. Yeah. I'm telling, hey, oh, are we not actually surprised this movie's actually not a nightmare? I'm pleasantly surprised. Very surprised. Where the whole school watches a woman masturbate against her consent.

Yeah, that's pretty rough. That one part. That one moment. I thought it would be much, not only much more problematic, but much less enjoyable. Like, it actually is like pretty funny in a way that I didn't think it would.

I didn't think it would still be funny, but there's definitely some of it that really is. Well, also, it follows the rule of, like, these kind of movies need to be an hour and a half or shorter. Like, that's it. Like, it cannot be any longer. Yes. By the way, he just, he was like, oh, my God, you're gay

because he was singing how sweet this be loved by you. So it has its moments. What holds up less during this time? I would definitely say road trip, because like we already mentioned, one of the plot lines where literally revolves around instead of a...

It's such a copy and paste of American Pie too. One of the characters instead of searching for a milf is searching for a blonde Asian woman. Oh my God. His ultimate like Holy Grail is the existence of a blonde Asian.

I brought up this movie to some friends yesterday and I was like, what other movie around this time period do you think like that people should rewatch? and you know what they said with resoundment I don't know if that's a word and that is the movie Harold and Kumar

they said there's still some like of course racist bullshit that's in it because it's you know because it's of that time but it actually is more enjoyable than you I never fell into Harold and Kumar and hilariously enough the only Harold and Kumar movie is like the way later Christmas special, like, movie that they made.

That was, like, in 3D, which, by the way, one of my favorite little, like, watching experiences is watching movies made for 3D that aren't actually in 3D. Because, like, the whole time they're going like, whoa! But it just does nothing for you. You just start laughing because it's so stupid.

Oh, shit, Rick. This is dangerous, too. Yeah, this is, uh, actually. And this was such a normal thing, too, because it dumb and dumber was, was drugging someone with shit, powder or whatever. Right. As a thing.

Yeah, yeah. The laxative thing. Well, I shouldn't talk over this scene, but I was going to say something that I realized. So I said, well, I said before. So Jackie could fully concentrate on it and really take it in the shit. We watch this shit, MJ. Yeah, you love stuff like this. I love shit humor.

Dude, this was a huge moment. There hasn't been any, like, racial slurs, but obviously, like, there's just, the entire principal cast is white. I think we saw one black friend, right? So that's just also a different way that people... Oh, it's a different form of racism. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, right, right. Like, it just would not be considered to be like, let's make the cast not 100% white, you know. By the way, like, his issue with putting, like, the toilet paper down on the seat, and I definitely had a strong disposition towards using a public bathroom

of any kind, much less shitting at a, school bathroom was like a fate worse than death for me. Yeah. That's why this scene, despite being so gross, also was very resonant for people. Maybe not this scene, but the whole shit brick only shooting a home thing for sure. Really soak it in, Jackie. Jackie's face. When did Dumb and Dumber come out, by the way, though?

Because this is such a rehash of that in like so many ways. Dumb and Dumber was wet. Ninety-four. Yeah, 94. So this was like so old hat. And yet, it still worked, just crushed in the movie theater. If he hadn't talked, they wouldn't have known it was him and he could have just shit. Sort of. They could see through the little, there was always that thing. American bathrooms are so dumb. It still exists all the time. I know. There's a little space you can fucking look in. Europeans think we're idiots for that. Yeah, because it's dumb.

The love, when did you first say you love, I love you to someone? I, I think I said it. I was pressured to say it. Wait, was that, was Ellie after first Lexi, though? I might have said it to First Lexi. First Lexi. But I was definitely well in college. Oh, yeah.

It wasn't until I was 19 did I say, I love you to somebody. Yeah. I certainly thought it, but didn't even have an opportunity to say it until I was not. I was in love with people that didn't love me back. Of course. Tale as old as time. That's why we love musicals. That's why we love musicals.

That's why we love Les Mis, especially. Oh, and the last five years. It was actually really cool to see lacrosse in this movie, by the way. I know it's really lame, but like I was... We did not have lacrosse. Yeah, I was like in the first... Like the year they established lacrosse, I played on that. at my school I played on the team.

So it was kind of unheard of. But what is this? It sounds like you really identify with Chris Klein Holden. You're the choir boy, even though. But not, but I'm also directly opposed him as he's also like the jock pretty jock. He's the pretty boy jock. Yeah. So actually I.

Although I think his hair is dumb. I'm going to go ahead and say it. I mean, his hair is definitely. Everybody's hair is dumb though. It's 1999. Yeah. Who has good, who has good. Who has good hair in this movie?

Like literally no one. Especially the guys. Yeah. You're right. All the guys have awful hair. Awful. Absolutely horrible. Weirdly was talking about La Crosse the other day with someone.

This actor played a coach in multiple movies in the 90s for sure. Uh-huh. And again, you know, I think one of the big things that always happens when you rewatch any comedy from this era, you're like, wow, this is like, wow, this is like, weirdly slower than I remembered it. Because you remember the big parts. You remember the big parts. And you also were fine with a movie just like being a movie.

Yeah. And not constantly trying to grab your attention every two fucking seconds. Just like let it, you know, and it be. Definitely a lot of filler. But it's not bad filler. It just is slower pace than a... That I'm used to now.

I mean, honestly, the writing is pretty impressive to be able to intertwine all of these. stories like this and like have them all kind of move in this way. Yeah. Yeah, his lacrosse gave him an epiphany. He loves to sing. He just wants to sing. And he's gay for it.

Calling him gay all the time is just, obviously it's like bad to have in a movie, but also it was so real. Oh, yeah, completely. I mean, again, I mean, these are genuine, a, you know. Truly a product of their time. Genuine observations of high school. That was why, like, I almost want to look into, like, how did they nail it so hard?

Like, did they fucking pretend to be a high school kid or something? And, like, because they kind of nailed, whoever wrote it, like, must have been pretty young. They really nailed a lot of actual discussions happening in schools. Like, like the, you know, nothing before the. sex or whatever and stuff like that. This relationship has not been like created at all. They barely talk to each other. Right.

And it's just like trying to make this big relationship out of it. Yeah. Yeah. Acapella is doing a lot of heavy lifting for the, for this particular plot. Yes. In terms of the emotional resonance. But we are in high school musical all of a sudden.

No, you're not in high school musical. We are about, two-thirds of the way through this movie is what we are. So this was this guy's first movie. I should say Adam Hertz is his name. Yeah, Adam Hertz is his name. The screenwriter? Yeah.

And he was, yeah, that makes sense. So 27 at the time. We've got a black choir teacher and she is very excited about the duet. And then there was one black friend. I think those are two black people that I've seen. He also wrote American Pie 2. Do you remember American Pie 2 at all in? Yes.

Well, what happened? What are some major beats in that one? Well, I should, I guess I should say. Wait. Wasn't this movie, wasn't it like, wasn't it weirdly just like a repeat of the first movie? 100%. That's all I remember was the same plot. Every single joke and plot, like somehow.

And maybe they were in college, but. Something. And it was the same. And it just wasn't, I don't think that it was as good. That's kind of all I remember. It was definitely, and this was a thing with comedies of this era. Every sequel, like Austin Powers was pretty guilty. of this, every sequel would be like, remember this joke from the first one?

Same joke. And remember this joke for the first? You're just like, yeah, dude. Although I will say Austin Powers 2, it worked for me. Yes, it did work for me. Oz Powers 3 did not work for me in that way. Yeah. Did not work for me in that way.

He also did, oh God, he did all of them. He did American Pie, American Pie 2, American Wedding, American Reunion. And then I didn't even know this existed. American Pie presents girls rules in 20s. maybe that's one of the things that we're is missing from our conversation about it's like you know resonance is that it became this self perpetuating thing that then became iroli like while it was still happening like american wedding okay we get it you know but like i think i forgot that the first one really did feel fresh because it immediately stopped feeling fresh immediately because american pie too i remember immediately everyone was like huh yeah like this is the same movie yeah uh prom but it really does have every, like, high school movie thing in it. Yeah. Jackie, haven't you also not seen Austin Powers?

No. That's the next watch a long we should do. Wow. Yeah, we should probably do that watch along. That's a hundred percent the next watch long way should do. That's a good one. I'm definitely down for Can't Hardly Wait. I'd love to do Can't Harley Wait. It's funny because Jackie has seen like every, in my head, I'm like, Jackie is so knowledgeable

about movies. She's seen like every movie. If anybody mentions a movie, Jackie will at least know about it. Especially of this ilk. Yeah. Especially this like romantic comedy, sex comedy. I just wasn't into, I wasn't, I was definitely in the age of like, I don't need to watch what everybody else is watching. Right.

So this was definitely the time that I was watching other movies that people didn't know about that. You were watching filmic experiences. Yeah, you were watching the movie Pumpkin. If you want to talk about a movie that is raw, blomatic, it is the movie pumpkin. starring Christina Ricci. And at this time period, I believe I was obsessed with that movie. And but I'm a cheerleader.

Yes. Natasha Leon. And what was it? Oh no, Pumpkin was in 2002. Yeah, yeah. What was Pumpkin? Christina Ricci did some. She was like the, if you were young

and you liked her at this time, you were like really cool because she did cool shit. Yeah, she did the cool stuff. this is like a genuine sweet moment too this movie gets weirdly this movie does a good job being like we're a dirty sex comedy and then and keeping that even

through the end with the flute or whatever but getting weirdly like wow this is touching and graduating and going to college is going to be hard did he ever introduce the fact that he wants some milf though does he ever talk about like

the milf thing or is it more They throw it out there earlier. They were like, is it true he likes older women? And so I think that was part of the, it was just a... But it wasn't the conquest for the Melfth kind of thing. Like, it wasn't the... Oh, I want to be with Natasha Leone.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Who is that? Wait, she's in stuff. What is she in? She's in, like, C.W. shows. Who? The girl that the gross redhead boy was dancing with.

What's that kid's name? name again. And then she ends up in Buffy, right? That's her big things. She ends up with a huge career off of this as well. Band Camp girl, right? This is a pretty great, terrible fake band. Do you guys have a band for your prom? No. No. We had a band. We had a band. We had a band and we yelled Freebird and they played it, which is very fun. Whoa. Yeah. I think they were so happy. We would be like, this is our thing. If someone does yell Freebird, we oblige. We oblige. We will do it. And it was pretty great.

That's funny. I think that's long dead too. Honestly, I don't think the younger generation knows about the Freebird request that at every show someone would yell Freebird. There you go.

Standing up for yourself. Yeah, you're right. Holden. Alison Hannigan was in Buffy. Yes. And then, of course, how I met your mother. Yes.

Yeah, this was her big, I think, I believe this was a huge breakout for her as well. This made the career Because I bet it's one of those stories Where like, maybe it's not But I bet it's one of those stories Where it's like this was just,

they thought it was gonna, you know, do okay And yada yada yada and it was this little thing And then this became like this massive hit Because it just came out at the exact right time Middle of the summer two men. Oh, so horny, dude. Whoa. Terry just got stolen away.

There you go. See, I love how much of a bad as she is in this. I know. She is so herself in this already. Yeah, she's her fully realized. See, I'm right to have a crush on Finch. Finch is cool.

I don't have a crush on him anymore because he's young. But he is obviously the coolest boy in the ensemble for sure. He's a little like greasy. He's very sweaty, yeah. But I guess another funny thing about movies made at this era is like they hadn't quite figured out like, you know, the makeup got a lot crazier when HD came around. And so at this time, it was like not as, not as good. So just if you notice, a lot of the guys throughout the movie just look like greasy and like, like, that makes them look like,

that really gives off the impression of like, these are real high school boys, you know. I mean, props to Allison Hannigan for not having one time at Band Camp totally defied her career, you know. Right. Oh, my God. What a household. Yeah. What a household fucking. I think. I think she's also maybe in Buffy. That's the other girl I was saying I think she's in stuff. Oh, that girl. Yeah.

Sherbinator. Sherm. The shirmer. He got shirmed. He got shirmed. You just have a pile of pennies in his pocket? Oh, he's wet in his pants. That's kind of sad.

But the feminist justice, that's kind of nice. Yeah, it's funny. It's funny that Shannon Elizabeth, by the way, we haven't even seen her again in the movie. She got back on it. They were that her parents or like the people saw her exchange parents and they sent her back. That's great. They're just like, you did your thing. You're out.

And we were all mad about it. All the boys, all the little straight boys in the room were so pissed. Like, what are you doing? Because, I mean, she was like Playboy centerfold after this and just was this hugely. And then such a flash in the pan. Yeah. And then she was like terrible in three more movies. And then like went away forever.

It's kind of her story. Because she wasn't, even in this, she's not very good. It kind of helps that she has that accent. She can kind of hide behind that. Yeah, it's true. It's partly the character and partly her. She has no personality. Yeah.

He pissed himself. That's always what, everybody was lying. You know what I mean? I said, at one point I said I've like fucked an elephant on a safari or something just to get people off my back. You know what I mean? Like, yeah. Oh yeah.

just been ignoring his like, did he go with the band camp girl yet? Or had she not, right? They went together. Jason, yeah, eggs and he's just been ignoring her, right? Because he thinks she's a loser and she hasn't told him that thing.

She's a sexual fiend. Man, it was, though, put into us that like, wouldn't it be so beautiful for you to have sex on your prom night? Right. Yeah, it was such a big thing of like. Yes.

So much pressure. There was a lot of weird. pressure to, you know, lose your virginity by a certain time or whatever. You guys are going to fuck, aren't you? The screaming fuckers. That was me at that age. Did you ever walk in on Avery? Avery was also completely sexless and constantly in the friend's in.

I know shocking too, right, because he actually should have been. Yeah. But he did the same thing. He did the same thing I did where we would just get a crush on some. who was never going to be with us. And then just like, I think that was just a safe place to be. Also, you're told to do that kind of by love songs and everything.

Yeah, you're supposed to like, oh, exactly. You're supposed to fall in love with one girl and then like get her and whatever. Yeah, the whole, you know, say anything. And like win her. Yeah, exactly. And that was total bullshit. And of course, led to a lot of like just resentment. And then you just be angry, right?

Because John Cusack can be the nerdy boy, but he gets it. but then you don't and then you get just to be angry. And also, again, though, I really think it was just the safe place to be. Like, because even the, the girl who offered the after school blow job, I was like, well, I can't do that. I'm in love with, you know, Liz. You know what I mean? And then I didn't have to, like, deal with the fact that, you know, of like what sex might actually be like or whatever. And I think, because I think I, yeah, I think I lived in that safety zone, you know.

Avoidance. Yeah. because I definitely totally threw away some opportunities back then and I think I reasoned it as something else

and the girl I had the biggest crush on all through middle school we end up and of course she ended up dating my friend I fall for a totally different girl

in high school Liz and I'm just all Liz Liz Liz it's all I can think about is Liz drop Jennifer out of my head forever

I end up doing a school play with Jennifer I think it was maybe sophomore year, I can't remember. I ended up doing the school play with her. We are flirting non-staff. It's just her and I hanging out. We totally hit it off.

Because I'm no longer into her so I can just be a fucking human being around her. And we have the best time at this play. It's really flirty. We're like really kind of touchy and stuff too. And she writes me this note that essentially ends with like so question mark, like essentially ends with like, let's go out. You know what I mean? Kind of a thing.

And I just never hit her up and just never followed up. And I look back now and I'm like, I could have had a fucking high school girlfriend. Absolutely could have. But I like just was, I think I was just fucking terrified. Yeah. And her mother hated me. I can't believe how small the Jennifer Coolidge role is. It is.

I know. This was much bigger part of the movie. Very just right here at the end. But it was such a show. It was such an end of the movie showstopper. It looms large for sure. Yes. Yes.

Yeah, it's kind of amazing, actually. Also, Jackie, back me up. None of these girls have prom hair. You don't wear a sparkling headband to your prom. No, I'm sorry. These girls, if it was 1999, and they were all at the prom, they would all have extremely overdone. Huge, oh, yes.

Big hair. Big hair. No way. They were at the salon for hours. Their eyebrows are waxed to the guild. Oh, yeah. A real thin? French Manicure

Which actually Jennifer Koolage has It is weird to see a young Jennifer Koolha In my head she always looks the same But the thing was To us she was old or I mean she's this self thing To me she was as old then as she is to me now And White Lotus She's actually so young in this

So young Age 18 years the way I like it Yikes It's yikes for me done But he's 18, so she did not. She's 37. She's 37. That's my age.

Wow. It's my age. She looks younger. I would have put her younger. I mean, it is revolting to think about it. But it's legal and that's all that matters here. I mean, at least it's the kind of situation where he actively wants an older woman. It's not like she's seducing him.

You know what I mean? Hold on. You're doing a lot of, you're doing a lot of at leasts over there. Okay, here we go. I am, I am an American Pie apologist. This is the, this is the good part, yeah, this is the part with the flute.

Oh, it's not the good part. False alarm. This was also a very honest depiction of losing Virginia, too. They're both like uncomfortable, I believe, let's see what happens. But it seems like they're both kind of uncomfortable, it's awkward, it's not like sexy. you know what I mean.

Yeah, they're like discussing it. There's almost nothing sexy about losing your virginity. Nothing. Oh my God, it's awful. It was a horrible experience for me. That doesn't mean it can't be romantic to you, but like there's something I would say inherently sexy about losing it. By the time I lost my virginity, all I could think of was, can I please lose my virginity

so I can start actually like getting good at sex or being like because I just I was like. I feel something to get out of the way. It's like I feel bad for whoever it's with because it's going to be fucking awful. and then I can start to figure out how to enjoy it. And I even knew going into that first time, and it really felt like that. I was literally just like,

I'm so glad this is done so that I can actually figure out how maybe this could be fun. Yeah, so let's, okay, so in the couples, which is a couple that we can, like, morally support? Definitely Chris Klein. The Tara Reid couple is fun. They're doing good, communicating with each other.

I mean, I guess we can't like. Jennifer Coolidge's enjoyment of her boy. And shitbreak. Yeah, no, we can't endorse shitbreak and Jennifer Coolidge. We definitely endorse Jason Biggs and Alison Hanigan. Oh, this song. Yeah, all of a sudden, I was like, wait, why is this romantic all of a sudden?

I thought I was here to watch a horny sex comedy. Yeah, they have, you have to have it be all... I guess it is ultimately a conservative idea that they're all losing their virginity, but it has to be to someone who they, like, love, which is kind of... I mean, I'm glad no one's being exploited. but also it is pretty well, except for this situation where this is just like, hey, I'm a freak.

You're right. No, you're right, you're right. Ha! There it is. Also, I love her trying to play like she's not very cute and like, you know what I mean? She's like, oh, she's the awkward.

It's like she's clearly... Ew, not in the kids' room. There was a girl by high school who looked a lot like this character and I think that would have been hard if a lot of people just started calling you a character from a American pie. you know.

But you're right. She is hot. But she was so coated as not hot. Yeah. See? Girls are horny too. You're totally right.

We do get just a transactional mutually beneficial sex scene. I take it out back. Man. Yeah. Wow. Kind of has it all. This movie is not that bad.

Yes, it sucks about the foreign exchange should. Whatever. She's back in her home country. Nobody even knew about it. You know what? mean, she went back to where I'm country where nobody saw it. And everything's fine. It's such a basic, you know, 90s movie thing to be like, the sex girl doesn't have a

personality. It's not even really worth pointing out. You know, we've all done that media criticism before. It's fine. We know what's happening. I will also say that was definitely American Pie, whoever wrote that scene was definitely like wanting to do the modern version of the Porky's hole in the wall scene. It was like, okay, modern technology.

How would this go down? And in a weird way, they actually figured out. I love they play Mrs. Robinson. You're dead. That's so good. You're dead. But this song is taking me back. Yes.

But the chucks and the white jacket tuxedo, he really was a, he felt like a realistic character to me. Yeah. Yeah. I'm shocked by how this holds up. Truly, I would not have expected. Well, the little secret of this.

movie is that it's actually not like evil and mean for the most part. Like obviously again though, but I do think that I mean, the whole video without consent thing, that is and in fact they kind of nailed what cyberbullying and stuff like that in revenge porn and all that kind of stuff

would actually happen with the internet and webcams and stuff. Right. I love that she's the only one with experience. Yeah, it's so great. She just knows what's... What do you think she did with the flute in her pussy? I don't even... Mass, what do you mean?

She got a owe off of it or whatever. She slid it up there and wiggle it around until she owed out. Did she clean it off her? I'm sure she cleaned out the spit guard or whatever. Ew, just sitting out there on the dock and just a blanket. Come on, guys. Till the sun came up. Yeah, my prom.

The girl's house you were staying at, walked in on me. And I think actually the girl that offered to give me that blow job smoking weed on the porch. And just told us to go to bed and I was so scared to talk to her

the next day and she made me breakfast. She was very nice to me. I was so worried I got busted for weed. Oh man. Weed would have made everything better. And thinking about the Shannon Elizabeth scene, I think that maybe the worst thing about it is that because of the way

they make her seem like not like, you know, such a cartoon, it makes it seem like she likes the violation of consent. Right. You know, because it leads to her wanting to fuck him. It's kind of crazy. I forgot that she literally just disappears after the scene. It's like, so they just didn't have to deal with any of the consequences of that or any of the repercussions of that other than the guy being humiliated, which at least that happens. He's the guy, you know.

And it's like nice, I guess, in the movie, she's not upset about it, but really. that just serves to make it be like totally fine, you know? Oh, for sure. That's kind of the, that's kind of the weird thing. There was zero discussion of that being at all troubling. There was no discussion of it. Right. Whatsoever between us boys and girls.

And just in the media, I mean, this is a completely, in ways, you know, I'm not condoning that scene, but in ways of more beautiful, simpler time. You know, just because we just didn't have to deal with, oh, and then you said the thing, you can't, oh, yeah, you know what I mean? But I'm glad we're here and we're nicer. I was used cool. So funny. But you know what?

But you know what? Maybe not at that age. Maybe. No, I like that he gets to lose his virginity and then not be like heart sick about. You know, he just gets to be happy. And maybe not that age, but like, I loved being used, like, on a New York night and it being like that, you know what I mean? Definitely.

I mean, there was a, there was a young lady. I was like, finally well enough into my, like, post-breakup depression that I was starting to, like, kind of poke my head out of my shell. And I went to this house party and this, this girl just walked up to me. was just like, you and me, we are fucking tonight. You know, it was essentially like that. I was just like, okay. And I just needed someone to literally do that.

I needed anyone to just walk up to me and be like, forget about her. We're having sex night. And, you know, that's the deal. And just being like, all right. To get me through this. Dog ears. That's what, not dog yeah, which is what I thought it was. Dog years makes more sense.

Dog years makes me more sense than dog, yeah. It's like, what a weird name. Do do, do, do, do. All right. Yeah. Oh, she does come back. Oh, she comes back. Oh, no.

Oh, but is it to return the favor? Yeah, this is, they do try to make it seem fun. Yeah, they'll give it. They try to make her seem into it. It's so interesting. I wonder if there were, like, other drafts and stuff. I know. Because it is, obviously, we cannot take away the way that it was,

but it makes you feel fine. It is carefully constructed to make you feel fine about it. To be like, it's okay. That's what's so weird about it. It's going to be okay. Oh, Eugene Merri. Levy. Oh, not to cry, though I feel bad.

Haven't thought about the song quite a while. This was not as upsetting as I thought it was going to. Not as upsetting as I thought. I'll tell you what. Now, just to get a little nerdy about it, what a very precisely executed script. No fat on this movie. No, no fat.

You're right. We talked about like scenes taking their time a little bit, but we talk about scenes taking their time a little bit, but even in those scenes, there was plot movement. You're right. And stuff and like stuff they needed to establish with the relationships of them. But yeah, to have that many characters all have their own arc,

full arc, That's where I remember walking out. She'd be like, damn, they just fucking killed it, man. I am amazed. And, oh, man, I feel like I want to do a rewind now on 1999, even though we already did, because it just brings up so much stuff about what it was like at that time. I know. It was such a very, I think that's how we ended up doing this was talking about this movie.

I think that's right. I think we were talking about it in the high school musical because we brought up American what was our high school movie. Yeah. And by the way, can you imagine that? that that's what that's what we had but remember that wasn't really for high schoolers yeah that was for middle schoolers and middle schoolers and middle schoolers and even elementary school huh but i don't remember now what the that time what's the dirty what was the wild things what was the you know i guess

it's like it's all on fucking twitch and tick time there just isn't you know what i mean now that's such the ultimate question like what they don't have their what is there you go i'm going to make the teen sex comedy come back. There it is. There it is. Horty Holden's big mean movie of

you have your finger on the pulse. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're like singing. You're gay. I'll open with that. You know what I mean?

It'll be like totally dated and stupid. Thank you guys for giving me my first. We did it. There were a lot of first in this movie and thank you for giving me my first in the only way that you guys actually could give me a first.

Hell yeah. I love it. I had a great time. I can't believe it. I did too. I had a really good time. Bet on it. Bet on it. Thank you guys so much for joining us for this watchalong of American Pie. Hopefully you also had your eyes open to, and I imagine you were also scared of what was going to happen during this recording, as I was as well.

But we did it together and we made it through, and I just want to say thank you guys so much for having. hanging out with us. Any final words, MJ Holden? We got up to Annie. Revenge of the Nerds. Porky's. We got to find the more problematic filmic experiences that were sex comedies made for teenagers so that we can really get in there. But the next movie we are watching along with page seven has got to be Austin Powers. That's my last word.

All right. We could do Austin. Actually, I bet you there will be way worse stuff. Oh, for sure. For sure. Way worse. Zero question. Way worse. Way worse. way worse. You know? In every way. Across all the structures of oppression, it'll be worse. But there's stuff in Austin Powers that I still legitimately find to be some of the funniest comedic moments.

Like his, Dr. Strange, or what's his name? The Evil? Dr. Evil. His monologue about his childhood and group therapy is one of the funniest comedic moments I've ever seen. Jackie. All right. We'll have to watch it.

We'll have to watch it. We'll have a good one, everybody. We're off on the road this week. That's why we did the watch along. We'll be back soon, though, with more regs, page seves. Yes, we will. We will see you guys next week. I hope you guys have a wonderful week.

My name is Jackie Zabrowski. You can follow me on Instagram at Jack That Worm. You can come and hang out with us on tour Last Podcast Network.com. Get your tickets because currently we are in Oklahoma City and St. Louis and Kansas City, and we are having a blast. I know that we're having a blast.

So come hang out with us. under September and October days, Last Podcast Network.com. Check us out, page 7 podcast at gmail.com. Please send your conspiracy theories. Shoutouts all out there. Page 7 podcast to gmail.com. Patreon.com forward slash page 7 podcast if you'd like to follow us, $5 a month, gets you weekly bonus episodes from Jackie and I.

Weekly bonus readings from Jackie, add free episodes, pre-sale links, all that good stuff. So check us out, Patreon.com, ford slash page 7 podcast. And lastly, Twitch. Twitch.tv. 4.2.2.com. hold to nature's ho. Check me out on there, Monday through Friday streams.

MJ. My name is MJ and I'm MJKL Kat on Instagram. Thank you guys so much and we will be back next week. Have it going on everybody. Bye guys. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors. You can support our shows by supporting them.

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