Page 7 - Cannibal Corn w/ Natalie Jean

Episode Date: March 12, 2026

Natalie Jean joins us as her and Jackie recount havin' to John Redcorn themselves to present their monster fuckin' at the FAMILY FRIENDLY convention they just got home from this past weekend, we got TWO Jackie's Snackies and one starts off the episode 'cause Jackie got Natalie coffee w/o creamer so she could try the new Paris Hilton sweet and SPICY creamer instead, plus Jackie retells her very awkward Dallas welcome! MJ listened to the "Call Her Daddy" podcast episode with SJM, and learned all about the "Era's of Sarah", PLUS SHE'S STEALIN' JACKIE'S LORE! Jackie forces Adam to give his take on "The Bride" before givin' her own, and then we got a LIST of famous actors who competed on reality shows waywaywaywaywaywaywaywaywaaaaay before they were FAMOUS! MJ is very good at segues as we move onto the BLINDZ, and finally we got a CORNY Jackie's Snackies @ 1:07:27.142 with an MJ's Minute Munchies that Jackie's already BEEN THERE, DONE THAT @ 1:15:05.159 until @ 1:20:04.257, plus even more on this week's Page 7! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Everybody's everywhere. Hands in the air like we don't care. Because we have kind of so much fun now. But somebody here might get some now. If you're not ready to go home, can I get a hell? Hell no. Because we're going to go all night till we see the sunlight. All right.

So la-da-di-d-d-di. We like to party. Dancing with Bali, doing what at all we want. This is our house. This is all rules. And we can't stop, and we won't stop. No, you can see a dance. There's an re-o-va-night.

These is we'll bond that we can't stop. And maybe it's because all the Fayebeys, you can hear them rising together as their goddess S.J.M. graces everyone with her presence. But also, we've got another goddess in our presence today. Oh, great. I don't know if we had a vision. on this. I'm wearing Gilmore

girls' pajamas pants. You are. Are they Gilmore Girls themed? I didn't even know. Oh, they're Gilmore Girls themed. It came directly from Stars Hollow, okay? I watched her purchase them. And also, do you have some sort of a children's merrily we roll along shirt? Oh, no, this is a

witch shirt. Oh, I'm sorry. A woman in total control of herself. I didn't realize this was a witch that I was talking to. You didn't? No. I thought it was a bitch. I thought it was a baby in total control of herself. Right. That's true. Fair. Fair.

Sorry, Natalie. Not that I'm just saying this because Natalie and I are fresh off of coming back from Dallas. We have done, we did RomanticiCon last weekend. This last final weekend, we did the rewritten book festival.

Before that, we were at, did a show ripped bodice. We did a show the ripped bodice. And now we are hopefully going to be working with the ripped bodice more and more because everybody, in case you were worried, don't worry anymore.

Put your worries at the door. because Natalie and I are bringing the world of monster fucking into your eyes and ears, whether you want it. And maybe your mouths. Sure. If you consent to our fingers, and by fingers, I mean our soul's fingers. Because they are going to be climbing in any hole you've got that they can get into. And that does sound scary, but it is supposed to be seductive. Your soul fingers.

My soul fingers. Well, you know, I guess... MJ, is that get you going? Well, it's, you know what? It doesn't get me going, but it's only because I know that you guys had to make the monster fucking show G-rated family-friendly for everybody. And I think that that's the job Jackie was born to have is to write like an hour-plus long show that's all about specifically the act of having sex and then be forced to present that

hour without getting dirty. I think it's a fun logic problem. MJ, guess who was the first one to curse on stage eight minutes into the show? Was it Natalie? Oh, one Miss Natalie Jean. It was it only Natalie Jean that cursed during the show, yes. Yeah, it wasn't me. And Natalie did, yes.

It was eight minutes into the show when Natalie only one F bomb, though. You really did great. And I will throw it out there. A lot of the ways. in which we did the show absolutely we did not rewrite anything to make it family friendly we just changed

the wording of it we did only refer to sex as make during the show it was disgusting it was disgusting that's what she calls shit how can you use make in this instance it was the inverse yes it was the making love aspect

of it I do I do feel like I keep needing to stress that it's not for families it's family adjacent. Yes. So, okay. It's not to entertain your children. Yes, it is not traumatized the children.

Because they could hear, because there were possibly children in this open space, so they wanted to make sure wherever the microphone. But here's a thing. You had to be PG speaking into the microphone, but that didn't mean that I couldn't act things out, which I did. I mean, children have eyes. Well, they weren't watching the show.

They were like out. at the festival. You know, there was like more like walking through a festival. I don't know if they could figure out having intercourse with a snake as you were acting out because it would have been confusing at best to that. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Even for an adult, it's confusing.

You know, my high school theater teacher made us not swear in our improv group. And probably that was because it was a school funded event. I realize now in retrospect, she was like, you're not allowed to curse. but she said that it was because if you build up the skill of being funny without ever being able to curse, you can then fall on it later, which I, of course, did the minute I got to college and started doing improv. But I do, I have found, and also maybe it's because I've worked with kids for so long. There is, I am able to just access a part of my brain where cursing doesn't exist. And it's nice to enter that world, you know?

You just have to push some kind of internal button. Yes, to really, to get there. Honestly, Natalie and I did find a bunch of jokes in the show that we probably never would have found and that are probably going to stay in now. Oh, yeah, for sure. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it is like a skill. Sometimes it's so easy to lean on shock words and swears when you're doing comedy.

And that's kind of like, you know, obviously still funny, but like, it's a crutch. It is a crutch. It is a little bit of a crutch. Yes. Yeah. And I understand, honestly, even in the way, I forgot who was it? Oh, it was Will Arnett was talking about the crutch of having tattoos because he said that I've only ever met people that are covered in tattoos.

I've only met them. And he's like, and they're boring. That's why they're covered in tattoos. I was like, okay, Will Arnette. I'm trying, Will. Okay, Will Arna. Let me, I don't know if that's true. It's because you're very famous and you haven't met that many normal people.

Yeah. Yes. Yeah, please. Can we not make big sweeping statements about the population if you will have been rich for 30 years? I'm so sorry to immediately get our show off kilter because I do want to talk more about this weekend. But I needed out the gate because Natalie, we never start here with a Jackie Snackies. But we're going to have to start Jackie Snackies a little bit early today. Now, don't worry, we're still going to have a Jackie Snackies later.

But usually I like to bring Natalie a coffee when I go pick up coffees and I bring her one. and I did get you one today, but I got no creamer in it because I brought creamer for you to try. And is it Paris Hilton's sweet and spicy creamer? Yes, it is. Now, Natalie loves Paris Hilton. I think a lot of us here do love the Paris Hilton. I have a very strange love of her. It is strange love.

We all understand. Yeah, it's not an uncomplicated. It's complicated. It's complicated. Yeah, it's complicated. But I was, it just say, that's hot on it because it's sweet and spicy. Paris, an international delight collab. It's the collab of a century.

So I wanted to just pour some, we could, well, I'll just take a moment. Let me pour some. I mean, you could pour your own amount in there. Oh, my God. It is like your usual, just not without cream in it. Was this a surprise fine? Is it raspberry? No, no, it's a creamer.

And I don't, what does it smell like, Natalie? Okay, because there's, there's a raspberry champagne-flavored one. Let's sparkle, slive it up with tempting fruity flavors and raspberry and champagne. Oh my God. Yeah, I got to try it too. Do you got to just do a shot of it, Jackie? No, no, no, I brought an extra. I'm not a nightmare.

Jackie loves her novelty creamers. Do a shot. Yeah, do a shot of creamer. I love novelty creamers. And I know that you're not supposed to. And I do try. Why do you just use oat milk instead? I'm not going to lie to you here.

I love a creamer, okay. The love is blind creamer last year was fantastic. What are you thinking? You remember when you were really little, the very femme toys that we'd all be handed that always had a smell to them? Like they intentionally... Yes.

That's what this tastes like. Wow. Natalie, I was tasting it as you were saying it. And that is correct. It tastes femme. It tastes like a toy. It tastes like a child's toy. It really does.

It tastes how femme feels. I am going to throw it out there. I put a good amount into my thing. I'm not getting any spicy. I don't think there's anything. I have a little tingle. That's about as spicy as it gets with Paraselt. Yeah.

Wow. Wow. No, it is, but it gives. It's not disgusting. No, it's not. It's giving also like a. birthday cake flavor with a hint of pop rocks in it. Oh yeah.

You know, like that's weird. Like that's, it's not spicy, but there's a, there's a, there's a, there's a, there's a, an effect happening on my tongue for some reason. For an international delight creamer, it's not that sweet. Yes. Which is nice for me. Yes. I don't like it too sugary.

No, but so, all right. So we're, we're, we're interested here. I don't know if I would purchase it again. No. It does feel a little bit like I'm eating Plato, but like in a nice way. You know, it's like, oh, this is childhood again. Yes, yeah.

So it's really not so. I'm glad I really, I found this in the wild like three weeks ago and I've been holding on to it. But don't worry, creamer never goes bad. I know. Did you make it out? Like you left out the wicked yeah, I left that out. You know, I just wanted to see, I wanted to like

see if the chunks affect us, you know? Self-sable. But later on, you are going to be getting a snacky, maybe one that I received over the weekend while we were at the rewritten book festival. Now, I did include this joke in the show that we did because I said that I was welcome to Dallas so quickly, MJ, because within three hours of me getting to Dallas, someone asked me if I was trying. A stranger that I had just met. That we, it was like based on your appearance that you weren't trying hard enough?

See exactly what I? That's where exactly my mind. That's where exactly what Natalie asked. No. I was just surprised because the person I was talking to had, I thought, I believe that they're younger than me and they have like 16 and a 17 year old. And that, because I know I'm old, that kind of broke my. And so, but that was a thing, MJ, is that it was in a conversation that was kind of separate

from that. So then she asked me, are you trying? And I said, to what? And I genuinely didn't know. And I was like, do people, you? Because I just was so not ready for someone to ask me if I was trying. Then I genuinely was like, to do what? I'm trying to do many things.

Yeah. And I immediately, my mind went, oh, you can tell I'm trying too hard. Right. I don't think that's very polite to bring it up. That's also how I should have probably taken it. Are you trying? I would think, oh, I'm not trying hard enough. Try to hard enough, I guess not.

Wow. Yeah, no, you, okay, are you trying is certainly a thing that people say, but only if you are already in a conversation. Although, I don't know you. I don't know you here. But I should say this was not in like a passive. She was a lovely person. It really wasn't being malicious, absolutely sincere.

Was being genuinely interesting. And trying to get to know me. Yes. And it's totally, no judgment of the question being asked that just I also wouldn't, obviously, because we just tried it out, I wouldn't think that are you trying needs for children? Well, unless I'm already in conversation about children. Sure. And our godless cities that we live in, that would be a very inappropriate question. Apparently in Dallas, fine, fine.

Fine. Fine. You're trying. Yeah. Because we did pop it into the show and it didn't get quite the hit that I was expecting. and I think that it was because people maybe didn't think. You're right. I'm used to godless Los Angeles where no one is thinking about my womb at all. And I like it like that, you know?

Are you trying? It's such a hilarious when it's an open-ended question. I know. It's actually like a very like pointed specific question. And if you misinterpret what they're saying, it could mean so many things. So many things. I was spiral. Wow.

And I didn't. spiral. I want everyone. I mean, I did then had to like recover from it. And I was like, oh, that's such a loaded question. Like, what a bunch of landmines you could have. What if they were trying and having like trauma. Yeah. That's a big, that's, when I was very visibly pregnant, people, I repeatedly

had the problem of people asking me, when are you due? And I always thought that they were asking, what do you do? Like, I thought, oh, you're taking an interest in me. And I would start explaining, you know, because it's not an easy answer. And I would explain, oh, I work with children and I have a creative. And they're like, they were just looking for a number, you know, like, how pregnant are you? It was humiliating.

And it happened over and over again. So fun. And so now whenever I'm asking someone when they're due, I'm like, when, what date are you due to have a baby so that I don't have the same? same instance. Yes. Going back and forth and back and forth. You know, it was, we really, though, we had a blasted Dallas and Natalie and I got to meet a bunch of really fun people.

We got to meet the people that run Romanticy Illustrated, which is a magazine that is now doing very well. Beautiful magazine. Put us on the cover, Romanticse. We should be on the cover of that magazine. That sounds right up your alley. We are trying to, but it is. We met so many amazing people.

And part of what we were. so excited about to talk about on stage this weekend was an unfortunately and fortunately for mj we did encourage them to listen to the call her daddy episode that was starring sarah j moss i did listen i listened and i learned yes and for those of you that are unaware mostly like what the what is what is what is possibly happening here s jm is the right of Akatar. Natalie and I do LPN Romantici deep dives. Definitely please go check that out. She wrote the world of Akita. She wrote the world of Crescent City. She wrote the world of Throne of Glass. She is still writing those worlds. And people treat her like she's Jesus Christ.

It is very crazy. It's that but also because of that, the back swing that happens is then there's a group that is like, well, my personality is that she's just, I hate her. Right, right, right. And she's the worst thing that's ever happened to literature. And she's the devil. And like, I wish that we didn't have to swing such extremes online, but we just always tend to do it. Yeah. And this is, Jackie said that she's kind of like that Taylor Swift of the Romantic universe.

And I do find that's similar with Taylor where it's like we go really hard one way or the other. And people are. And see, I feel nothing about Taylor. And if you feel nothing, people are like, feel something. You know, like people really don't want, like the fact that Jackie and I both really enjoy many Taylor Swift songs and also are very annoyed by many things she does really unsettles people because I really want us to take a sign. Pick a side.

They can't handle it. It's like there's no neutrality with Taylor Swift. No one wants anywhere, please. Exactly. And there's a lot. And for those that are not in the Romantasy world, there's a lot of anger too out in the world of book talk. You're either fervently for her, for her, for her. And then

there's also a bunch of, like you said, the backlash of it. And as well as there are millions of amazing, talented romance writers out there that also deserve platforms. And so there is a lot of that where, you know, that is a lot of book talk going against it and being like,

but there's all these other works too. And it's almost like we're all out of control and our world is being controlled by monster pedophiles and we're just trying to put all of that tension into things that we can control. Yes. It's not necessarily helping anything.

Until we find the Council of Vampires who are actually in control. And then things are really going to get spicy Paris Hilton because that's hot. Whoa. That was a lot of stuff. Yeah, it was good. Bring it back. It is the creamer is chunky. I think I was supposed to shake it.

Probably. I just wanted to throw that out there. But MJ knew nothing. of the world of SJM. Not, I'm sorry, I shouldn't speak for you. I'm assuming you knew nothing of the world of SJM. You just knew that she existed. Only would I pick up from you guys.

And, yeah, I was not surprised to hear that she's exactly my age because all of her references. It was just like, you know, she, she, she, well, she said that she's about to turn 40, so she's a little younger than me. And she is making all of her friends go on a week-long trip. And the theme of the trip is the eras of Sarah. And I'm just over here trying to process this. I'm like, are my friends shit?

They would never do that for me. But maybe I should just try. And maybe I've never asked. Well, for my 40th, I paid for the thing. And I said, come to my, come with me. I made a thing happen. Sorry. Yeah, dude.

You go to Florida. Yeah. I had this place I've rented. Oh, yeah. You did do a fun thing for your 40th. Yes. And it was amazing. But also, that was amazing because like that's something that's like,

You provided the place. It's literally like, just get here. But I imagine that she probably did something similar. I probably. Yeah, but you also didn't make us dress up as you. I should have. Or like eat only the things you like and no one else was allowed to eat anything else. Yes, we would have done it.

We definitely would have. But now this is good. I'm glad that we're talking this out for my 40th next year. And I'm sorry, MJ, you didn't even get. So what are we going to be doing for your 41st, you know? Yeah, I didn't. I did nothing for my 40th. I had friends over and it was great, but I should have been much, I should have really

seized the opportunity to be completely self-obsessed. And it's fine. Like, this is what your birthday is about. And I usually do do that on my birthday. And not only do I do it on my birthday, I used to also do it on my brother's birthday. I'd be like, how can I make this about me? I do love that. Also, speaking of, did you end up putting up all of the birthday, the birthday celebration decorations

I sent you for your 40th? A girl, not only did I put them up, but they're still up in my house. house. I've got... They're still up in your house. Shorty hit 40. Thanks to Jenny. I've got more fun than two 20 year olds. Very, very upsetting. Very upsetting.

Very upsetting. Everybody kind of laughs at the shorty at 40 and then they see the other one and they're like, what the fuck? What is that? More fun than two 20 year olds is a horrible sign. I don't know what that means. That is a horrible. A horrible side.

And then also I identify as 30, which I identify as 30 is also very. Very stupid. What was the one that Natalie that you got me for my Bachelorette party? Last weiner to go in between her. Last weiner to go in between her. That's what I went, God, it is my favorite banner to ever exist. Last weiner to go in between her is such a stretch on a banner to, like that is such a, what a move.

Well, and also, Jackie sent me balloons that were black because I was talking about how all 40th birthday decorations are black because you're black because you're going to die. Well, definitely when we were growing up, they would definitely, were like, your life's over, go fuck your sense. Yes, this will be dead. Exactly. But Jackie sent me a bunch of all black balloons that said, thank God I'm still alive, which my children thought was very funny. And they're still all over my house.

Wait, MJ. Did they all say thank God I'm still alive? Some of them. No, that was just the best one. And also my children's favorite. They said, they all said it because I was like, wow, that's aggressive. and they all say they got up still alive balloons. No, there was also like, wow, you're old A.F.

Yeah. It's just so horrible. There was a couple other ones. But, yeah, they were good. They were good. But, you know, it's no eras of Sarah, okay? Right, right. And also, wouldn't you call them Sarah's?

Yeah, right. Come on. Really sleeping on this. Come on. And what I learned about eras of Sarah's is that, yeah, I don't know. I did not go into the part where she talks about the books. I did not make it there. But I learned about her vibe.

You wouldn't know any of what any of it meant. I don't need that. But I did, you know, I, I, I am glad I listened because I obviously she's a cultural phenomenon. And Caller Daddy is also a cultural phenomenon, which I also don't usually listen to. I like usually see the highlights of what people go on and stuff. But it was reminding me of like. Two high schoolers talking to each other?

Yes. And when she was like, all the books we read in high school were bad, I did kind of want to be like, girl, I understand that we can revamp the high school literature curriculum for sure. But also, I'm going to ask for just a slight ounce of humility when you're talking about yourself and comparing yourself to like, you know, the canon of American literary figures. Sure, sure, sure, sure. You know, whatever. You're not here to do that. You're going to talk about smut. And yeah, I mean, it is well-written smut.

It is fun. It is a fun, huge world that she's created for all of us. They are extremely and entertaining. Yes. I'm not even crapping on her writing. I know that that's also a thing people do. It's, I don't think you have to be like an extra intellectual, performatively, like, you know, expansively intelligent writer in the sense where you're like, wow, how did she come? I think that she writes in a way that is so engaging and so fun and so relatable to people.

And I think that that's also a skill set. And it is cool. I love pop culture stuff, you know? Yes. And I do like that even though I have not read these books and I do not like fantasy and I will not be reading them. I do like- I love that you're just anti-fantasy. The entire genre. How have we been friends for so long?

And it's just so funny. How am I married to who I'm married to? I know, man. I know it. I know. But I did, despite all of that, I did, of course, it's like Harry Potter when people are like, oh, shouldn't children be reading like better books? And it's like, I do fall in the camp of like reading is reading.

Like, reading is good. And if more people are reading for fun. And obviously the whole book talk thing, like I know that's not only her. It's all sorts of other kind of poppy, right. Like I love that. Many, many, many, yes. I read Coho. You know, like I like a fun, easy to read book to slurped down.

Well, maybe it's because you are untamed. Whoa. And we know it. We're all untamed here, guys. But yeah, I think, I think that getting more people to read and I think the fact that people are so excited about her. And yeah, like, S.J.M. On Caller Daddy isn't. Sorry, also, that was Glenn and Doyle. Not, Untamed is not.

You know, whatever. Also, great. Yeah. But also, we are untamed. Just throwing that out there. Colleen Hoover, who wrote the one that became the one with. Blake Lively and. Oh, that ends with us.

Yeah. But I thought it was fun to see an author kind of permeate the pop culture world. You know, the Caller Daddy thing is like this symbol of like, wow, this is the most popular shit you can do. And that is kind of fun, you know. Yeah, it was very much like a brat interview. There wasn't any, like, we're not, I really don't watch Call Her Daddy, no offense at all to her, this woman.

But I don't think she really delves deep into like, so. political topics. I mean, you know what I mean? Which I think it's fine. Yes. I mean, neither do we. I completely understand. But I will say I watched a whole season of Dancing with the Stars thinking that Alex

Earl who was on Dancing the Swift Stars was the same person that hosted Color Daddy. They're both of their, to be fair, both of their names are Alex and both of them kind of look the same. Who's the other one? She's another social media person. Oh, okay. Yeah. Alex Earl is the one from Dancing with the Star.

But now I only know her from Dancing with the Stars. So, but that's not what people know her from. She makes TikToks and whatnot. Yeah, she makes TikToks, Natalie. And everybody's upset about it, except they're not. But everybody is upset with Gwen Stefani. This I didn't include in our listicles this week because it just popped up of Gwen Stefani being asked about her promoting the anti-abortion app.

Hallow. Oh, yes. And she's being asked about her Christian. She's being paid very heavily to do that. She's being paid very. Okay. Yes. Okay.

Sure. Maybe Hallow is backed by J.D. Vance. But you should know that when Gwen Stefani was on Jeff Kavana's podcast, a Catholic evangelist who makes the daily gospel reflections for the app, she said the reason why that she got so Christian was because she really wanted to have another baby. And she said, noting that her oldest son at the age of eight approached her on the topic, her eight-year-old son, and told him that she was too old to have a baby. And then he said, please God, let my mommy have a baby. And I just remember thinking, look at my little boy.

He's praying for me. And that's why. And that's why I took $5 million. And so that's why I'm going to be making, because she didn't realize that everybody prays. And that everybody should be paying to pray. Yes, she'd have. And then she realized that maybe if God put the baby inside of her, if it off God took the stalk to put the beak in it.

I, all of it, I don't really have much to say about it. All is, all to say is that now, unfortunately, like B-A-N-N-A-S came on at the grocery. store and I wanted to be like, shut it it home. I can't enjoy this. I don't even want to hear it right now. The son should have asked Gwen Stefani if she was trying. Yeah, but are you trying, mom? Is Blake weaving

the sods inside of the bathtub? You think she got pregnant the salt burn way? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, she just scooped it up because, I mean, he's certainly not going anywhere near her. I think that he just sees once he puts on camouflage, yeah, he starts coming. He's too drunk. he's probably too drunk.

I mean, at the real, she's like, oh, it was a miracle, you know. Oh, yeah. So that's why, yeah, because they were trying with the Immaculate Conception route. And they weren't having enough success with it. Yeah. The Halo app really is where my boundary is. I think I lose. I actually spiral every time I think about the Hallow app.

It's just so dystopian. Everything is right now, but yeah. Maybe it is because every single. is so you have absolutely no patience for anything anymore. So you see it. I'm just like, Jesus, I'm just, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Yeah. The Hanno app is really, it's just upsetting in such a visceral way. And it's not like I was ever Gwen Stefani's biggest fan. No, no. You know, to go from just like a cool kind of alternative, alternative girl when there wasn't a lot of that in, you know, in the pop culture realm to now just like shilling for the pay to pray app.

It's sad. Her and the worst Chris. Yeah. And oh, God, the worst Chris. And Mark Wahlberg. Sorry, not to pivot back to the SJM interview, but I do want everyone to understand that there's, I think I've come full circle, Natalie. I think I've, I've, whereas at first there was a confession in the SJM podcast that is my confession. And do you think that either we had the same up?

upbringing or she's a fan. The legless thing. And she's been listening and I'm talking about the legolus thing. I was like she has to know about Jackie and Natalie's show. Like she has to. Like you talk about legal. I know you're not the only girl, not like the other girls. Like you're not the only girl to like legolus in middle school. But MJ, I am the only girl that I was aware of that starting on round table 15 years ago, I've been making jokes about the fact. that every night I would make out with my Legolas cutout to the point that I kissed through the cardboard. I made it so wet with my mouth make that I kissed all the way through it.

And apparently S.J.M. did the same thing. Did the same thing. Yeah. I, you know, I'm not going to say that she's lying. Whoa. Wow. Okay. Let's start controversy. I think that it's true. Are you starting a feud? Yeah, I'm starting a feud. S.J.M. come at me. I want you to come at me. I want also go and call her daddy

and I want to talk about this because I and I feel, and it's not because I'm not like the other girls on the horniest one, but I don't know if she's as horny as I am. How are you going to measure that? I guess we're going to have to go toe to toe. Yeah.

Which, I don't know, which. Pinky to-picky-toe Peaky-toe. I just sit next to each other just holding our feet up to each other. No, no, stop it. You can start a feud with her about who made out

with your Legalist poster more and I don't want to feud with SGM. I just want to tell her that some of the American literary classics are good for hoardy teenagers. They are good. The Great Gatsby, I know not everybody loves it, but man, it's a great book about

unrequited love and pining. You can relate to it that way, whatever. Like, and I, yes, I was shocked when she talked about Legalis, her relationship with Legolas poster. And I thought, and also, she used the phrase Hot Goss. And I was like, is she a page 7 fan? But maybe, I mean, yeah, maybe we're not the only ones. utter delusion. I see you do it.

S.J.M. hit us up. I think that we could also, it's like, here's the thing. Let's get into, like, the real shit. So hit us up. We want to talk. Jackie wants to put her toes on your toes. Yeah, just pinky toes, though. Like we're just going

Pinky Doe to Pinky Doe just to see if hers are bigger than mine. Well, that's an offer. How is she going to refuse that? I don't know. Yeah, right? This is like the godfather of offers,

SJM. Come over here. Come over here. Man, I did see the Mortal Kombat trailer last night and it does look like a lot of fun. And I was watching that trailer before I went to go see the bride.

I don't know. Oh, I saw it. Is it as bad as cats as this is the problem with Twitter, man. They used to be you would get a review from somebody whose job was to talk about movies. And I'm not trying to gatekeep over here, but one person tweeted that the bride is as bad as cats. And now there's a whole headline about how the bride is as bad as cats. Is that true, Jackie? Where is the proof as someone that has seen cats so many times?

And they also have a lot of references to, they have, have, referenced it towards Joker 2 as well. But Adam is the only other person I've seen who has watched it. And I want to know what Adam has to say about it before I say what I have to say about it. Oh, no. You can't do that to me. Yeah. I did just do it to you. I did just do it to you, Adam on the spot. No, actually, it's pretty simple for me. I don't know. I had a blast, but it's a complete mess. Yeah. And it's a crazy, crazy swing. And I don't know, it seems like harmless. in that sense. It's not maliciously insane.

It's someone really, really trying something insane. And, you know, all that stuff is kind of, it's a 50-50. Sometimes a swing works and then the very next second it does not work anymore. Exactly. And the thing is, is that in like trying to reference it to like Joker 2, don't get me wrong, it's a mess. It's absolutely a mess. Absolutely.

But Joker 2 wasn't, I feel, I feel like it didn't actually swing hard enough. I think that it was very boring. And the biggest problem was that it was so boring. This movie, you can't say it's boring. And this is, Maggie Gyllenhaal is the director. Maggie Jillenhall is, it is. Is it our first movie? She did The Lost Daughter.

Okay. And that was like a really good one, right? But it's like jumping from, it's, I think it's the classic mistake of jumping from like a $5 million movie to a $90 million movie. And that's just, that's hard on anybody, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The one thing I will definitely say. is, man, if you didn't want to bang

Jesse Buckley before this movie, if you are a monster fucker in any way, shape, or form, boing, boing, boing, moing, like, I thought I was going to boing out of the theater. I am so in, and also, she's just so, she

is so wonderful in it, but the thing is is they make every choice you could ever imagine. It's kind of fun. And they shove it into one movie. It is all over the place. but I liked that it was all over the place. Okay, convince me to see it.

I feel like... It's fun. It's fun. It's not good. It's not good. It's not. You know, when you talked about the Joker 2 before, like, the Joker 2 had contempt for the audience. I felt like this is trying to entertain you in the purest sense.

It's failing from time to time. Yes, but I also think it knows how camp it is. Yeah. And it's trying to be funny. Yes. I do feel that, like, it knows what it's doing. It's not like you're not, I don't feel, I didn't feel like I was laughing at it. I was definitely laughing with it.

And I feel that the audience wasn't giving it enough. Like, I feel like letting it be all these different things. But I think it's because everyone was so whiplashed of how much is going on. Now you didn't know what happens in this movie. A lot. And it was not what I or I think anyone expected. Oh. Yeah, I weirdly thought there was going to be, I thought it was.

a musical. I thought it was going to be a musical. I thought we had another secret musical on our hands. Are they trying in the movie? Well, you know, honestly, it brings in all the conversation I bring in during our monster fucker show about how if vampires are not warm-blooded and they're not cold-blooded, they're technically undead, so they're no-blooded. How do Edwards alive spermies get inside of her and make a hybrid monster baby? Right, because the science is definitely, we need to figure that out before we can really lean into the Twilight movie. It's like how they wrote the movie Flubber. You know, you have to make sure you know what you're, like how to make it before you

can just jump in. You know, Robin Williams can't just do all of that. Thank you, Adam. I appreciate, you know, I left you. I kicked you out to dry. And I appreciate you got wet instead. No, I'm glad. It sounds like we had a very similar experience.

So it worked out. Yeah. I really, I went into it too, not looking that far into it, just knowing that. people were comparing it to cats and also give me a break uh that's a little ridiculous as someone that has seen cats so many times and i beg for it to be over by the end uh that's not where i was significantly worse yes and also you know at the end of the day you know there's a million dudes that would get another chance and another chance and would be forgiven for like a gigantic weird mess like this and she's probably unfortunately got gonna get like totally clamped down on which

is just such bullshit. And it's bride and Frankenstein body and Clyde. It essentially is what it is. It's, that's horny. It sounds great. It's not,

it's like with SJM saying all the books we read in high school were shit where it's like, but you can't even say. She was talking about it from her teenage mind. Teenage mind. Teenage mind. I know that.

But I'm just saying that like, it is like, I'm not saying that the bride is the godfather. But if you are, if you're, I'm curious. Check it out. Because it is a lot of fun.

If you were saying it was the godfather, that would be pretty fun, though. Cool. Yeah. Time to make a hot take. I said to Sam afterwards, like, I didn't fully love it, but I absolutely think in like 15 years, this will have a crazy following. There's absolutely going to be a group of people that this does work for and they love. Because I even, and I think that Jeff had said this when we first saw the trailer, too, where he's like, if I were 16 and saw this movie, it would be my entire

personality. I would be dressing as her. Like, I would be, I would have lost my, because it's also about, like, of course, feminine rage. And so there's all of that. Toxic relationships. It's all, because it is a very, honestly,

I did lean over and make the joke at Jeva one point. I was like, this is just dating me in my 20s. It was what it kind of felt like. I just felt like, I was like, oh, that's just when I was unmedicated. But, you know, Or maybe I'm the bride. And thank you for listening to my.

Thank you for listening to my review. I was just really excited to see it because so many people were likening it to cats that I was like, oh, maybe is this something that it's like, wow, it's so bad. But I honestly thought it was too enjoyable to be compared, especially to compare to Joker 2. Well, and there's that. There you have it, folks. But I guess, man, we're just chug a chug a chugging. I didn't realize we were already all the way over here in the episode.

I don't either. It's already time for the list. Oh, who's on the list? Jackie, got to have that list. Famous actors who competed on reality shows way, way, way, way, way, way, way before they were famous. And don't worry, we're not talking about, we're not bringing up any America's next top model in here. These are only, although I'm sure there are some people on here that were probably traumatized, but not Tom Hardy.

When Tom Hardy was only 20 years old, he actually took part in a supermodel competition show called Find Me a Supermodel. This was back in 1998, and it aired on Channel 4's The Big Breakfast Morning Show in the UK. Oh, the Big Breakfast Morning Show. Oh, the Big Breakfast Morning Show. And he came in first place in the competition and won $3,000. Wow. So think about that. And so, which crazy, because if you do look up, if you put in Tom Hardy during this reality show, he, I'm not going to say that he had a glow up.

Yeah, he looks quite different. He looks not as great as he does now. Correct. So wait, Tom Hardy, how old is Tom Hardy then? It seems late 40s? Yeah, he must be. He was 20 years old in 1998. 48.

We can do this math. Damn, 48. Man, he, I want to say he doesn't look at it, but I mean, he's, Jesus Christ, I can barely look at him. Oh, yeah, he's daddy. Yeah, he's firmly on the daddy. Well, yeah, that was a different look he was going for back then, huh? Yeah, it was definitely not my thing. He's kind of like doing like the crow.

Kind of. It is, like, like, greasier. Like, very wet to the touch. Yeah, like one that got trapped in an oil rig explosion, you know? It's given Ross Geller from Friends. But did you know that Emma Stone was only 15 when she became a contestant on VH1's In Search of the Partridge family? Yes, I did know that one.

Did you watch this show? Not in real time, but I've seen the clips of it. It's really intense. Oh, my God. It seems very intense. It was only a one-season show. Apparently, Emma Stone won the role of Lori Partridge, and they even filmed a pilot. Oh, my God.

But for some reason, it never aired. Have you ever seen the video clips of her singing? She's saying the Alanis Morissette. No, she's saying Melissa Etheridge. She's like, I'm a bitch. I'm a lover. I'm a job. Which is, I mean, quite a choice for a 15-year-old to sing.

And maybe that set her apart, but I love that. I love an Emma Stone. Man, me too. Yeah. I really, I feel like everything that comes out about Emma Stone, too, is just genuinely. And this isn't fair for me to say, because I feel like I get annoyed when everybody says it about Jennifer Lawrence. but I'm fine with it when people say it about Emma Stone

when they're like, she's just like us. Oh my God, she's relatable. But I feel like Emma Stone actually is. And I don't know why I've decided that for myself. I think it's for me it's because she makes weird choices for her acting jobs. I like, I appreciate that. Yes. Yeah, yeah.

It's all the, the Yorgos Lantamos films that makes her more appealing. That crazy, what was the show where it was like a fake reality? The curse. The curse. That was so bizarre. And so fun. Yeah, great. I liked her in that a lot.

You're right. And she, I think that's what it is. She makes weirder choices. And I like that that's where she pushes into. Now, I know that Emma Stone and J. Law, which I feel like I had some articles in some weeks past,

that they're working on a Miss Piggy movie together. Yes, we did read about this. They're producing a Miss Piggy. Okay. It is very funny because they had some interviews together where they kind of went back and fourth and they were both asked if they were playing Miss Piggy and both of them acted as if they were offended as if they could ever play Miss Piggy and like how dare you ever even ask the two of them?

Like Miss Piggy's going to play Miss Piggy. Why would we play Miss Piggy? And I, you know what? It's shaky. I'm in so far. I'll see what happens. I watch it. I mean, I love Miss Piggy.

I trust it. I trust those two with Miss Piggy for some reason. I do too. But I trust them. Yes. But, I mean, I don't know if Lady Gaga was scared in 2005 when she was 19 years old. Lady Gaga appeared on MTV's Hidden Camera Reality Show Boiling Points. This was a very early 2000s kind of show where contestants were put in a stressful situation to see how long they could last without losing their cool.

The prize was only $100. But there are pictures of her on the reality show and she looks like a girl from the Jersey Shore. She really does it. It is of the time here. She looks just like Snokey. It's crazy. I absolutely love all non-Lady Gaga, Lady Gaga pictures.

Like, it is just so fun to be like, you're just a normal lady. And then you're Lady Gaga. She's like, you're Stephanie. Yes. Yes. But it always makes me think of a, like, just thinking of knowing everyone like a lady got,

like a Stephanie Garamamaama. That person, they, because she, they used to tell the stories of, You used to be able to in NYU hear Lady Gaga singing in the hallways because she was always singing. And I was like, yeah, I fucking knew those people too. Yeah. I knew them too. But ones that just always were, I get it.

You're very talented. But like, it's Lady Gaga. And she like really does have the voice. Now it's Lady Gaga. But then it was. Remember she got the, there was the Facebook group. Yes. Yeah.

Yeah. She must have been pretty annoying. I think she probably was pretty annoying. But now I love her. But now I like watching her interview. Like I like the way that she's like, I'm not as annoyed by her now. But I imagine if we both were at Tish at the same time. Oh, yeah.

That would have been. Wait, were you at NYU when Gaga was at NYU, Adam? I'd have to look that up. I might have been. Who knows? I feel like you might have been. You probably would have been the same time period. Whoa.

Yeah, we probably, I mean, that story always kills me. So I probably would have ran away from that person. I'm sure you had quite a few of those. in the NYU's directing school as well. I'm sure there were a couple of annoying. Always directing everyone all the time. I mean, I made friends with you guys because I made no friends at NYU. That's why?

Because you weren't making any friends at college. That's explicitly why we're friends. Yeah. We just pushed you out. So this is good. It's good that we found each other. Oh, it's perfect. It's better this way.

And also it's better this way for you, Jesse Buckley. Even though a lot of people are shitting on the bride. In 2008, Jesse Buckley was a contestant on a reality competition show called I Do Anything. The goal of the UK talent show was to find an unknown star to play the lead in a West End revival of Oliver. That name of a show is truly horrifying. It's from an Oliver song, I'd do anything for long kiss. Anything.

I don't remember the words, but I remember the tune. No, it's a woman. Oh, okay. I thought you were, I thought, oh. No, it was a sex worker, Jackie. Oh, well, we're pro. That's apparently also a simple. plan song, but that's not what I'm talking about. Give me the lyrics to the Oliver song,

Internet. Anything. Anything. Anything for you. Yes, thank you, Natalie. You know what? We didn't even talk about Timothy Shalameh shitting on actors, I mean, dancers and opera singers. So take that, Timothy. I think he's an active campaign to make everyone hate him. I think that there's just... I don't think he's that self-aware. I think his head is just so far up his own ass. So far up his own ass. His mother was a dancer. It is just so, so annoying. He has been in the developmental stage of a teenager, despite being beyond that.

He's like 30. Yeah, and he's too old for this shit. It's something that would be fine for a 17-year-old to say because they're literally like not developmentally ready to like look that far beyond their own worldview. But he is. It's almost like. And he needs to open it up. It's like he's regressing because he was playing these sort of like deep artsy character.

at the beginning of his career, and that's how he kind of developed a fan base. And now he's just like, I'm dumb. Hey. Yes. Yes. I'm stupid. 100%.

That were curious about what the lines were that we are just talking about. He was talking about referring to Netflix's Frankenstein as a slower-paced film that was successful. He said, some people do want to be entertained and quickly. He said, I admire people and I've done it myself who go on a talk show and say, hey, we've got to keep movie theaters alive. We got to keep this genre alive. And another part of me feels like if people want to see it like Barbie, like Oppenheimer, they're going to go see it.

I don't want to be working in ballet or opera or things where it's like, hey, keep this thing alive even though no one cares about this anymore. All respect to all the ballet and opera people out there, which no it's not. And what are you talking about? It's like, shouldn't that be the opposite of what we're like, we're trying to not let these art forms die? Yeah, why are ballet and opera just catching strays from you? randomly. Nobody was even asking you about that. It really was a catch and stray's moment. I just cannot stop thinking about the TikTok of an opera singer. It's the captioning is like opera singer's reading the news and he

reads it and then he just looks up and goes, Shalameh. I need to say it in that tone always. It's like it's just such like, I don't usually use this phrase, but it's like pick me behavior. It's just like, I'm so cool. I'm dating a gener. I think that other art sucks. I just want to like popular art that makes millions of dollars. But you're totally right. He built his whole thing on being like a little artiste. Yeah, for sure. There's this weird anti-intellectualism thing that is this specific.

I don't know if he's trying to be like a pick-me-to-manosphere people. Right. That's kind of what it feels like to me. Like he's trying to be accepted by meatheads who are assholes for some reason. Maybe he just wants to like feel big and strong. Or maybe because he's with the jet. made fun of for being a tiny little guy with a French name and a little tiny mustache. I mean, I shouldn't have done Willie Wonka.

You know, I could have been an option for him to not do. It's like, yeah, just pick one. Either be somebody who like gives off little artsy boy or be like somebody who hates the arts. I am a big red pill piece of shit. Yes. I love it. And just pick one. Yeah, pick a lane.

Yeah. And I don't want to blame the gender because. I was just about to say, do you think it has something to do with it? But he also like, he comes from class. I'm sorry. I keep making disgust sounds, and I apologize. Disgust away, Natalie. I don't, yeah.

I mean, I'm going to be personally judgmental if somebody's dating a Jenner, you know, or a Carda. Like you said, Natalie, his mom and his grandma both dance with the New York City Ballet. His sister trained at the school of American ballet. What the fuck is wrong with you, Timothy? God knows. And also, it's a thriving art form. I don't know why you're saying that people don't want to go to the ballet. What are you, like, a 90s kid and a citizen?

calm. Right? People go to the ballet all the time in the opera. It's still very popular. Also, I do appreciate the amount of TikToks of like very strong dancers that are like, you wouldn't last so fucking. Of course. Doing what we do. What are you talking about? Yeah. Yeah. So at least there's that. Like at least it's just like immediately everybody's just like, oh my God. Even controversial figures who I'm, you know, not necessarily a fan of but Doja Cat got on from her bathroom to sort of like chastise him. I mean, and that is a person that is going to be on the stage at Live Moss Live at the Hollywood Palladium.

I'm so upset, Natalie. I couldn't get tickets. Yeah, Doja Cat is a huge Taco Bell influencer. Natalie, I've been trying, I heard about last year this thing called Live Moss Live, which is a live Taco Bell influencer event where Taco Bell influencers are invited to come and try. all of the new products that Taco Bell is going to be putting out. I'm trying to get tickets to it. I have failed again another year in a row.

And now here's the thing. I don't want anyone to think, I'm not a Doja Cat fan. I think that she's very, I think that a lot of the things, you know, the music is one thing. She makes weird choices in life. She makes weird choices, but she is a Taco Bell enthusiast. And that is something I do understand. And an opera defender. And I just want to hold both of those, you know, because yes, obviously there is like a financial

barrier to seeing opera. And it's not even that that was what Timothy was saying. If he was saying we should make these art forms more accessible. We should lift up art. We should fund the arts. We should bring the arts to all youth so that they're not so inaccessible. That would be great. But he's not saying that. But I just think it's very funny that she can, I'm grateful, not a criticism that she can defend the high arts and the Taco Bell arts. Yeah, exactly. Whoa. Taint multitudes, you know.

Sorry. Yeah, that's the fart side of it. Live my Slive dose. Yeah. Well, you know, that's my list for you. I wanted to end it on Jesse Buckley because, you know, she's real hot and we also both don't love cats. Oh, wait, her show was called I'll do anything.

I do anything. Yeah, that is the... She's saying I do anything. It was, okay, but it was specifically in all of her themed show. Yeah, from... Okay, okay. Correct.

Yeah, this, yes. Got it. All right. So it's slightly less terrifying. Yes, yeah, yeah. Then just I'd do anything. I'll do anything to be famous. Even though I'm pretty sure that is what they're given during that.

But, you know, that's okay, too. Everybody wants to be on the West End. All right. Well, I want to be on the West End, but I'm going to be the, probably not the first blind actor on the West End because I can't see. Wow. First Blind Actor. I don't know. I'm trying to do a second way. There's been many blind actors on the West End.

I apologize. Go after MJ. Don't cancel me. Don't cancel me. I like the high arts and I like all people have fallen. abilities. I am the disabled. Who said that? Oh God. Yes. Alyssa Milano. I am the disabled. I am the disabled. And I think I'm going Blind items. Ah, we can't see them. All right. Well, I am very good at segways. And this blind

at number one, quite relevant to our conversation. Voting may be over, but the meme actors team has decided to do some mud slinging as revenge for the bad press. And the current target is the new three-named frontrunner. In private, the meme actor is blaming the A-list reality star for the bad press, despite her doing, as she was told, the whole time. The matriarch still insists she worked her magic, and the meme actor will win. We will see.

A lot of moving parts in that blind, but it will come into focus very quickly. Meem actor? They always call this person a meme actor. I don't know why. We can put that to the side. He's an actor. He is trying to win.

a big award that's coming up. All right. The Oscars are coming up. There is a three-named front-runner who is now the more likely to win that award. Now, our three-named front-runner. Now the person- Does a letter count as a three-name? Michael B. Jordan? Yes. That's what I'm saying. Is that three names if it's Michael B. Jordan? I don't know. Take it up with the blind writer.

Yes, Michael B. Jordan. So, and the, the, the, the, meme actor is blaming the reality star for the bad press, and the matriarch says she's got it, she's working her magic, he's still going to win. Oh, so it's Timothy and Kylie and Chris. Yeah, so they're making their Kardashian money moves trying to make sure the Timothy Shamma-Lama Ding-Dong still wins. Michael B. Jordan is now the favor over Timothy Shalameh. Definitely.

And Timothy Shalamee is doing some mud slinging. I don't know why he's slinging the mud. at the opera because Michael B. Jordan isn't an opera singer last time I checked. But he, so, and Chris Jenner is trying to puppet master allegedly the whole thing to make sure that Chalamee is the way. And it makes sense because I did have to look it up because I was like, didn't he already win? And he hasn't. He's been nominated four times, but he is not won an Oscar. Well, I'm not rooting for him.

I'm not either, especially, you know, I like him as a little actor. but just if he could keep his mouth shut. I loved him in the Nard war interview, though. He has his moments where he's very appealing. He does. He's very charming. Yeah, yeah. The lot of the charm is kind of evaporating for me here. I do think, and I don't want to blame the gender.

I'm sorry, I can never remember which what it is, but I don't want to blame the gender because I do think it's like, I don't know, problematic to like blame the woman for the man's being objectionable, right? But I think that it's more about who you spend your time with. I think that if he's spending time with the card. you're going to get annoying, you know? I think it's less about it being of the woman and more about being your and brownness entity of this, like, you know, a woman blaming the woman for a man's behavior.

But it's like if you have decided to latch on to the entity that is the Kardashian family, I, there, it's going to be, make you different. It's going to be different in a bad way. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I agree with that. There's just no way that you can, you know, it's like how Taylor Swift has become increasingly. increasingly more annoying the richer she has gotten because it's just like you can't, you just can't be normal if you're spending time only around extremely rich people. And I think that Timothy, it's like you can't not become a little bit annoying if this is,

if the world you're in is these people, unless you have a profound disdain for these people. To not acknowledge the kind of the parasitic behavior of a family like that. And I'm saying this about, I think that there's a level of wealth threshold that if you, you pass, you become a monster. You're a bad person. Yeah. You have to actively choose to not be a good person anymore. Yes.

Yeah, you have to go against the current of. And that's why, yeah, I always love, you know, Jackie sometimes points out how Chapel Rhone's disdain for the press is like such a bizarre choice. And I'm like, I kind of love that she's just like, I will not become a part of this industry. Right. She just won't. You know. That or like the Billy Island is out there that gave most of her money away away.

It's like, because she knows, she's like, well, I'm just going to make more, so I'm going to keep giving. And then calling out other people. And why aren't you giving more of your money away? Yeah, and I like that. Of course, leave it to like the 20-something girl to do the right thing and all of these pieces of shit are just. Yeah. Oh, we need to stop paying more. I mean, just seriously, I just want to, it makes me so, I'm covering all the upscene stuff on Spun and it makes me actually want to burn things to be around.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But speaking of not doing the right thing, this former A-list singer slash international box office star loves inviting men over for sex to make her ex-ge jealous. What? I just let. Jesus Christ. She's divorced. This blind is so much. What?

She's divorced. And she's having sex with men. And that's the blind. It's literally just she's having sex. She's not with him anymore. Consenting sex. She's happened man over. Oh my God.

It's like a 1960s gossip. I know. I just had to. Has there been a different car in the driveway as well? We don't talk about her a lot, but, you know, she was wronged in the late 90s, early 2000s, that era. She was a big pop star. Mandy Moore.

You got the right era. Jessica Simpson. Yes. Wow. She loved to have sex with men. She loved sex. have sex with men. Oh, it's a rotating

it's a rolodex of her bedroom. Disgusting. How dare she? She is not married and she is having sex with men. You aren't God. I read her autobiography because I really love reading like pop to people's autobiographies. It's really interesting.

But you have, you really forget that she was pushed to that evangelical world through her creepy father. And she was so sexualized in the church community. Yes. And, like, told her body was, like, making men stumble and all this stuff. Like, I would probably also go through a phase in my life. You know what I mean? I'm having sex with men.

Of having gentlemen callers. Yeah. Do it, girl. Having independent sex because you can. Yeah. No, she was done so dirty. She was done as, you know, almost as dirty as Britney. And or as dirty, just not with the same quite level of intensity.

Same creepy, they look exactly the same to her. Their fathers look eerily similar. And their mothers too, but like just creepy, weird, possessive dads. Yes. Yes. And there's a great, you're wrong about deep dive on that book. If anybody wants to. Yeah, it's fantastic.

Okay. So this is my last one. And it's long, but I just have to because this is somebody who's very important to me and Jackie. Okay. The dilemma. This resurgent TV actor has had a great ear with his hit show. After his first hit show, it was always. hit or miss whether he would get back to the top. He said things were so bad that at one point

he stopped paying spousal and child support for many years. Yes, he was a deadbeat dad. Oh, you won't see any of that in the news this year. And he didn't mention it at a recent awards event, but it happened. It is funny looking at it because even though he stopped paying and said he was broke, the first year he stopped paying, he earned nearly $3 million. It was also pretty interesting that the year he stopped supporting his children financially was also the same year he got married to a new woman. Could he not afford two families? Or did the new wife just tell him to ditch the first family?

The new wife was also the one he cheated on the other wife with. Anyway, he did the deadbeat thing for about four years before the first wife managed to get all the back support paid to her and the kids. Talk about blaming the woman. Did the wife make him be a deadbeat dad? Jesus Christ. It's the woman's fault. but also I like that in that the way that was phrased and said and yet it did happen as though it wasn't him choosing it

it happened upon him that he didn't pay for anything life is happening at him okay Natalie he can't control it where he puts his dick okay but he chooses but here's the thing he's getting nothing but good press right now glowing effusive press including from yours truly me and Jackie over and over Whoa. So you support Deadby Dyes. Oh, I guess we do. We do.

Is it other Oscar news? It is a different, it is, his medium is not in the movie business. TV. He did miss TV, man. Resurgent TV actor with a hit show a long time ago and a hit show now that Jackie and I talk all the time about how much we love. Not a Tim Allen. Oh. No.

No. No. Who would be a dead be dead? Mad Men? No. No. Although apparently he's got bad secrets too. John Hamm is in a new show that friends and neighbors, I think that everybody really

likes that I literally was like, I can't watch Mad Men and Friends and Neighbors at the same time. No, you got hams up. Oh, yeah. It's too much ham. Yeah. This, okay, how can I give a hint? This, he's basically, it's basically the same show this year as it was many, many years ago. but better.

Adam Scott. No. Is he a dead be dead? I don't know. Oh, I hope not. I was more thinking of who had another show that was a hit and then now has another show that's a hit. And he's winning. That was a Parks and Recind of a Severance.

People are screaming in their cars, Jackie. He's winning all the awards. He's giving all the speeches. Adam knows. Baby Jane Do! Baby Jane Do! Oh, no. Wiley.

Yes. Yes. Baby Jane's. Baby Jane's. Oh, the Bay. Maybe Jane's oh, yes. The Pitt. Yes.

The Pitt. The Pitt. Oh, Pittsburgh native. The Pitt. Yeah. They don't film in Pittsburgh and they don't have enough yins or accents, but other than that, I believe people are claiming the show. Yes. Yeah.

They say, although, yeah. I know medical professionals are claiming the show, but I'm not sure of Pittsburgh people. I don't think they... I think it's mostly they're just making, like, it's fun for Pittsburgh people because they get to make the, like, if this is really in Pittsburgh, then there's to be like, hey, are you doing it? You need some kind of chippe I'm in here? I feel like you and Sina are my only Pittsburgh people. Wait, I just made that a queen's accent. Hang on, hang on.

I got to find it. I thought that was, you know, is bad about the accents as well. Let me do it. I got to get into it. Like, yeah, pretend like you're at Kenny Wood. Kenny Wood. Kenny Wood.

Kenny Wood, no downtown. Kenny Wood, where they, last time we went, and I'm sure this has changed by now, but last time we were there and we were so hungover, They didn't sell water at Kennywood. They only sell soda. You can get as much soda as you want. And there are water fountains.

But we were very hungover on a very hot day. And I just remember thinking, I'm going to pass out on one of these rides. Like on Spirit Airlines, they don't give you water. Exactly. You ain't going to, you ain't ready for Kennywood then. If you need water, if you need water in Kennywood, you don't even, you don't even know. Babi Jean-Dao. You're going to ride on Steel Phantom?

Babi Jain Dow. Catherine Lanasa is trying, but apparently failing at the insur accent. Yeah. So I need you to listen to specifically that nurse. Yeah, I haven't actually watched the show, but my mother was a nurse in Pittsburgh hospitals for 45 years. Oh my God. I'd love to hear your mom's review of the pit. Yeah.

Yeah, actually I don't know if she's watching. Yeah. Well, let's get her on here. Long story short, Noah Wiley is a dirty doggy. And it's very sad for all of us because we all rediscovered that the crush that began 30 years ago still is alive and well. And I didn't, I don't want him to be a dirty doggy. At the same time, though, MJ, it's kind of fine, though, because in this season of the

pit, I feel like they are giving, like, he's not as much up on a pedestal. Yeah. I feel like they are showing the cracks in the facade. And it continues to be a very well-written show, and he is a deeply flawed character. And we love that for him, but we don't love Noah Wiley because he's a dirty doggy. We're losing dungy on the, the bed. We've got to get the hot thing. We got to get the, oh my God.

Why are I going to Queens? Donnie! It's because you hang out with me and Henry too much. Oh, we got to get it. We got to get the little things. We got to get her back to Pittsburgh. We got to get her back to the source. Oh, my God, I'm losing it.

You need to be supping from the waters out there, Natalie. It'll come back as soon as you watch. Pittsburgh and dear to Super Bowl. Here we go. Oh, okay. Oh, it's that guy. Here we go. We're going to save him.

Wait, there it goes. There goes. We got to save him. for his family. What the family gonna do if he dies? There he goes. There you go.

There you go. Now we're in the pit. And now I can see. Welcome back, MJ. I am no longer the disabled. Whoa, even though we think about Alyssa Milano, every single week now.

I think about that tweet all the time. There's something from 2020. She was a real. She had a lot of stuff to say. She had a lot of stuff to say. She had a lot of stuff to say. But did she have anything to say about Snackies. I've been a snackie girl. Snacky. I've been a snacky girl. Snacky. I've been a snacky girl.

Snacky. I've been a snacky. Snacky. Snacky. Is somebody going to eat those chips? Is somebody going to dip those dips? Is somebody going to try those candies? I got seminar. They say I'm a snack lead. It's, I know, we were like, but we already did it. We already had our Paris Hilton creamer. I know. But a wonderful human being over the weekend while we were at the rewritten book festival found us was so excited that we still went to Dallas specifically because she had a snacky to give me. And this snacky was surprising. Go and get snackies. Now, y'all have heard me talk about peelers here on this show. Oh.

But did you know that they have corn peelers? No. corn peelers. They are corn flavored and they are Amos branded. These are real peelers. I asked her where she got it and she said Ross. And I was like, oh, good. Like at the cashier? What scares me is that on the top of the peelers corn container, it says made with real fruit juice. What does that mean? What does that mean? Because corn is not a fruit. Where are they getting it from? What are they putting in it? So we're going to find out, Natalie.

We're going to do it together. I know like a tomato is a fruit, but I don't think a corn is a fruit. I don't believe a corn is a fruit. I am, you know, I'm not a doctor, but I'm also kind of. Neither is Noah Wiley. Yeah, no, no, no, no. And he's a dirty dog. And I'm over here.

Oh, oh, it's corn. Oh, no, can you smell it? Oh, I can smell before I even opened the Ziploc. This is the second corn-flavored item you're having Natalie eat. I know, but Natalie likes it. I love corn. And Natalie, weirdly, I saw magic in her eyes when I received the corn. And that's why I was like, I guess I know what we're getting into on Tuesday.

This is the most corn-smelling thing I have ever smelt. And that includes smelling corn. And while we know in the book, Corn Daddy, we talk about it on our show, in the monster fucker show, I know that Corn Daddy. he comes butter But in this Aren't you supposed to be able to peel it? You're supposed to be able to peel it And how's your peeling process going?

That's one of my criticisms of the peeler You kind of have to get in there with your nails And I will say on top It does say that is peelable It is in the shape of an entire Like a husk Of corn Yeah

And I'm gonna As it should be You gotta peel the husk I'm from Iowa Okay People think it's hogs That are our pride and joy But it's the corn

Oh it's not the hogs I mean, we like the logs too. We're proud of the boat. This is weter on the inside than usual. It's definitely more wet than usual. It's not a peeler. It is not. No, this is a ripper.

Sounds like it's over than anything. Wet corn. What does it taste like, Natalie? All right, Natalie, it's... Um, it tastes like jelly, the popcorn jellybellies kind of, but slimy. Uh-huh. But slimy. Yeah.

It's popcorn jelly bellies, but slimy. That is what it is. That's 100% what it is. I don't care for the texture in the middle. Wow. I do not care for this, but if you... Sorry, Amy most employee who... Wow.

This is, I will say, what a flavor. This is, corn wishes it could taste this much like corn. I do also love, on the package cover and come look at the page seven post this week. It is a, it is a piece of corn. grilling corn on a beach and I feel like cannibal it is cannibal corn

we are we are now enjoying cannibal corpse or porn yes all of these things not not not cannibal forms not cannibal porn none of those things

there's this is shocking harmless candy cannibal corn guys it's fine hold up one of these. Show me one of them, babies in a husk. Babies in the husk. Babies in the husk.

You know, if you Google corpilers, it doesn't come up. What comes up is a tool to peel corn. Oh, really? Peelers. Like for the outside, how do you, what tool do you need? You know, if you have like loose teeth or like a person without strong front teeth, you take the corn off the cuff. Oh, yeah, yeah.

I honestly, I don't like the feeling of the string. between my teeth so I usually cut the cob. I put it on a cob for me. Me too. I like a cub. Natalie. It is just a corn, grilling corn. It's just corn. It's so fucked up. It's a corn grilling corn. Why would you do that? Cannibal corn.

That's like really gruesome if you think about it. It's a hardless cannibal corn. And yeah, why are they on a beach? I honestly, Amos employee. I know that you do, you don't, I'm assuming, when I do the PR for the peelers, but I am curious if you have. have any intel? Why are they on the beach?

And it does, unfortunately, because it's a smaller corn that looks like a baby corn that they're grilling. Wow. It looks like, yes. They're very happy about it. Oh, yeah. Baby cannibal corn. Fire roasted baby. Get it on the bobby.

Wow. I'm really comfortable. Oh, I see it now. I see the picture. Yeah, that is. Oh, yeah. You see it. That corn's eating a baby for sure.

Oh, that corn's eating the baby. So I guess I want to say thank you. to the person that sent that made, I guess didn't make them. Well, what if they made them? I mean, we are insulting. I'm pretty sure. But it is. Was this a page 7 fan, Jackie?

Or did they just give it to you because of corn daddy on the stage? You know what? I don't. They were a fan of our shows. Because you talk about the peelers on page 7. I assume you don't. I don't know the peelers on page 7. I also used to, which I don't know if this person knows that,

but I don't know if you remember during quarantine. we did a stream all the time. It was Classy Night Out that Henry and Eddie used to do on stream and I did exclusively baby corn jokes that I wrote that were all very bad. And so I don't know if that's why

it's corn flavored. I don't know if it's because I bring up corn daddy where he comes butter all over her as she's held up by corn husks dressed like a scarecrow. Your corn lexicon is just It just could be... Contains.

You know you're living a good life when there could be multiple reasons that someone gives you a corn peeler candy. Yep. You never know. Because of your body of work. Does that mean my life is great? Or does it mean...

Oh, I'm trying to be the hot dog ambassador of the Southwest region in the United States. I tried and I succeed. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. What else am I trying to do? I'm coming up with all the other things I'm trying to do.

It's like, yes, I'm trying to become a taco No bell snack fluencer, thank you for asking. I am trying and I'm not doing a very good job of it. Well, speaking of corn, I've got some chips to try. Oh. Oh. Oh. I see it and I wanted a snack.

Down to the Vegas where I'm in. I never know what I'm fine. Try something new. It might blow my mind. Hello, spicy. Hello crunch. J. M.

Mama. Mini Munch. Hello, Dill, you're my wild thrill. It's on jim, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma. Middiv munch, mini munch, mini munch, Minut munchies. Okay. These are chips made of corn because they are Doritos,

and the theme is not just any Dorito. It's late night loaded taco Dorito. Whoa. It's new. It's shiny. It is a very second. It is a sexy bag, but I really, really hate to break this to you, M.J. What, that's not new. It's not new? It's probably new to, like, New York, I guess. Because maybe they don't have, like, the newest of snacks there.

So you've had these? Yeah, that's, like, last year's snacks. Really? Wow. Yeah, but I will throw it out there that their late night, like, talk, like, not just talking. They have different late night flavors and you should really genuinely try them all. But I, but I, haven't tried the loaded tacos So hit us I've not tried them so it's Hit us hit us because I've only tried the I believe that I tried the Halapeno Popper

Late Night Doritos Those fucked Those are good These are great Right? What is it? It's got great flavor Loaded tacos so hit us

What are we getting from the loaded taco flavor? I don't know how to I don't understand why this is so good Or how it's so good Right? But it just like you know how like a taco has like lettuce and I don't I don't like sour cream and and but this chip tastes like it has lettuce in it in a good way.

Whoa. That's what you want from a loaded because sometimes the taco seasoning overtakes it. So it's like what's loaded about this taco? Right. Like a Dorito is already pretty taco adjacent. I'm like how are you going to. And my favorite one, my favorite food of all time is the taco pizza from Happy Joe's in Dubuque, Iowa, and it is a pizza where there's refried beans mixed in with the pizza

sauce, and it's like taco cheese mixed in with a mozzarella, and then it's topped with lettuce, tomatoes, and Doritos after it comes out of the oven, crushed Doritos. Oh, I would eat that. It's so good, but this chip just tastes like that. It's like got all of the nice, like, somehow, I don't know how, like the fresh elements of a taco, but also it tastes like a Taco Bell Taco, but like in a good way. I don't know how they make a chip taste like a Taco Bell Taco, but they did.

Those bastards over at Doritos and Oreos that are just so good at getting depth of flavor. There is a depth of flavor. There was a depth. There is a depth. There are depths of hell. There are depths. It's all everybody's depths.

Yes. Wow. So we're into. Will you hold that up for me, MJ? You bet. I'm going to eat this entire bag. And there's other late night flavors. Yes.

I wonder what the other. late night. It's like sushi. No, I know. I'm pretty sure there's like a cheeseburger one. I think that there's, so it's like other like what you, other like bar food kind of thing. Yeah, I guess sushi's. Yes. Susie. I don't know if New York City. Yeah. I don't know if everybody is like begging for sushi chips either.

It's got a fishy, very overwhelming fishy. Oh, that tastes raw. Lots of people love the shrimp chips though. There's lots of you're, you're either a shrimp chip lover or shrimp chip hater out there. And it's, it's wholesome. I, I'm not. not a huge lover of it, but I think it's just specifically because I dated a huge shrimp chip person. And there's something about being hung over and smell in a bag of shrimp chips open in your room that you wake up to that I'm going to tell you, I could never really get back to shrimp chips. Yeah, I think that's... You are very disgusted, Natalie and MJ, and I'm

glad that I can still get this look from both of you. It's what I'm always hoping for. And also, So speaking of Taco Bell, they did just drop these chocolate fudge and caramel empanadas that come in little two packs. Oh. And they were fucking delicious. Okay. Absolutely delicious. Yeah.

But, you know, that's it for me being a Taco Bell, not influencer, because I'm not at Live Moss Live. But you are trying. I'm trying. It's the only thing I'm trying for. And that is good to establish, you know, just to throw that out there so everybody knows in case you are going to ask me, I am not trying to do anything else. Just be a Taco Bell snack, but sir.

Thank you all for joining us. And thank you, Natalie, for hanging out with us on this week's episode of page seven. It was wonderful that, you know what's great, Natalie? We're sisters-in-law. We spent all weekend together doing shows all weekend and really grinding. And you know what? Couldn't wait to see you today. Yeah, excited.

This is really wonderful. Thank you so much. And Natalie, where can we find you? Yeah, Natalie, trying too hard gene over here. You can find me at the Natty Jean on all the stuff. Plus, we have a new Romanticidey deep dives, Instagram, and TikTok, as well as some place underneath Instagram, TikTok for my other show. It's not with Jackie, but with Amber Nelson.

And it's about very different, very different topics. But if you're angry about the geopolitical, sociopolitical issues going out of the world, you could probably pop over there. Yeah. You can pop back and forth if you need a break. You can come back over here and go over to LPN Romancey Deep Dives and take a break over there too. And thank you everybody.

And thank you, Natalie. And my name is Jackie Zabrowski. You can follow me on Instagram at Jack That Worm. Come and hang out on the page 7 Patreon. Oh my God. I am. We are just ripping through Sookie Stackhouse. We are ripping through season six of Buffy.

and I am just going to say this even though this is far in all of your futures. But tonight, MJ and I are watching the episode that we have been warned about at this point for over a year. And I'm very scared about it. I think that we're going to watch Love Die tonight. And I think that we're going to cry a lot. On True Blood? On Buffet. Season 6, episode 19.

So that's going to be coming out, though, for our Patreon members in some week's time. because, but those episodes and other interesting ones will be popping out over on the Buffy Watch Along on the page 7 Patreon. And again, coming out LPN Romantasy Deep Dives. You can follow us on Instagram at Romanticy Deep Dives and you can get us on TikTok at Romanticy Deep Dives as well. And we've got great clips coming out. We're going to be having insane content being put out from all of these things that we just did. If you are curious, I'm going to try to be putting out clips. of the show that we've been working on

and all of that is going to be able to be found. Just what the experience of going to a fantasy expo event is like. And that is all going to be found on Romanticy Deep Dives. Go give that a check out, Ski. MJ. You can email us, page 7podcast at gmail.com. We love hearing from you guys. Thank you so much for listening. Natalie, thank you so much.

We absolutely love having you here. Come back soon. pleasure. And we will see everybody tomorrow for Second Helpings. Bye, everybody. Bye. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors, you can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.