Page 7 - Ep. 375: They Call Me Jingles

Episode Date: October 22, 2020

Chaos reigns this week as we goss about the fall of Quibi, AOC's playing Among Us on Twitch; and in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner™: was Britney Spears decapitated?!?!Join us for vampire kisses - Patreon.com/Page7PodcastKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0 Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

It's a little bit early. You can stop me. And there, I swear, there's a reason for it. There's a time when I was sure. Yes, it's a Christmas Carol. That you and I were truly one. That our future was forever. And would never come undone.

And we came so close to be. And though you cared for me. Yeah, you thought I was just going to sing the fucking stanza. In your eyes tonight So we're not meant to be I'm sorry I'm sorry you're actually Jackie

Miss Sibrowsky You're not allowed to continue To sing that song Because I Jeffrey Katzenberg The Future Founder of Quibi We'll be We'll need you to stop singing it Because we are cutting it from the film

I hate you Jeffrey Katzenberg The love is gone The love is gone See, I would have fast forward in you if I could, Jackie So I got a hate to side with Jeffrey Katzenberg on this What? Alone, you're such a fucking Katzenberg Welcome to page 7

I'm sorry I'm cursing so much up top But I'm upset Because yeah, we talk about it almost every single year That the Muppet Christmas Carol That they take one of my favorite songs out of it In the goddamn DVD version And yes, you may think, but Jackie, it's not even October yet.

And I'm not trying to be a CVS or a big lots over here where they put out the Christmas stuff already. What I'm talking about is that Quibi is going under. Yes, all of entertainment called it, but also they didn't know what was going to happen with the pandemic. I'm sorry that hopefully people, not too many people will lose their jobs. Hopefully they get bought by somebody else. However, wouldn't the concept of Quibi be in theory if it was actually a good product

more successful during the pandemic because everybody's like recording things from home doing things on the fly, like the big deal actors and stuff like they actually were doing. Why don't we just consider this? Hi, I'm Holden. I'm here to say, I'm a very fun dude

in a mystical way. But, and Molly's here too. And Jackie was here and I'm also mystical. A cat's so clever as magical. Mr. Horley. Holdenophiles. My alter ego. I am made of magic.

It's pretty amazing. But either way, just, all right, okay, CEOs of the world, rich guys that don't know what to do with their money, okay? I'm talking to you, specifically right now. Because I see this time and time again.

I see this time again, this kind of eccentric, goof-em-up dude who ended up with some stupid money like starts one of these dumb-ass apps or internet sites for, content. It happens so much. I just want to grab them and shake of them and be like,

this is, what you really should do is instead of your like dumb content idea is you need to hire like a, just a bunch of nerdy 20 year old kids to sit in a room and all make their own just be an app factory and pump out as many as possible and one of them will probably become a fucking vine, right? And then you can sell it for a billion dollars. All of the apps that there were sleeper hits like Vine and even Twitter and all these things were just like young nerdy kids creating their own app concepts and then one of them catches fire

and they all of a sudden become billionaires. Don't think that you old person can just come in and create some dumb concept like... I know what the kids want. You know what you do? Yeah. You take an Instagram. Why don't we put...

some flowers on and have all the kids they like flowers. Well, you get extra flowers for the outside. No, I'm not talking to filter. I'm saying literal flowers, we send them to the people. The kids will buy them. They'll send them away by postcard. Jackie, it's like,

you know what we really need, Jackie? We need another website that we get independent content creators to create comedy videos for us. We'll pay them nothing. They'll just create all the content for us. We'll just put it out there, they'll work like fucking dogs, and then one of them will become successful

on it. Can we call it hilarious or cease to exist? Get it? Get it? It's like funny or die. I think that this is, I think Quibi was a silly idea. I think we all knew Quibi was a silly idea. I did, of course, you know what?

I downloaded it. I looked at it. I watched the Princess Bride thing on it. I watched nothing else. Not to say that it was bad content. It just wasn't for me, and that's okay. Who's it for? Just like I got rid of my CBS All Access, because I didn't give a fuck.

Well, Molly, of course, is wearing a Quibi T-shirt. She's Hart, Crestfallen. Molly, what's your take on this? Yeah, I'm over here really, really struggling to know what to say because of my Quibi fandom. Actually, I have just the slightest idea what Quibi is. I know that it's short videos. I really want to emphasize the fact that this guy who made Quibi is also the guy who cut when love is gone from Muppet Christmas Carol.

But yeah, I mean, I appreciate. My favorite thing about Quibi, honestly, is how much everybody hates it. Sometimes we all unite around hating a thing. And I think that's a lot of fun. It is kind of fun. The name's annoying. The concept sucks. I mean, come on, guys.

There's no way to find short, quick little videos on my phone. I can't find him anywhere. Where do I find them? But you know, they were making new content. I think that's kind of fun. But still, if only there were more short videos, I had access to. And what's I have to pay for? Because I think of just having constant unlimited access to that for free,

eight different places. I have eight different apps on my phone probably. I could call out right now where I could literally put my dumb thumb on the button and a dumb video just, it's my face. It has only been open for six months. And Quibi is a bit of a, what I love about the internet right now is that it's so, like, non-hierarchical. Like, people on TikTok can just be regular-ass people who make the most incredible thing.

And, like, I know that's like, the monetization structure isn't awesome for, like, getting the money to the people who deserve it or whatever. Like, ultimately it's the people who own the companies that are getting rich off of that labor. But I guess what, right, in addition to being needless, is like what, it seemed like Quibi was, it was, there was like barriers to entry. It was like, we're going to make like prestige TV, but in tiny spurts, right? Yes, it's like chapter television. So it's like five to 10 minute chapters of. That is a terrible idea. It's the opposite of what people want. That is the worst of both worlds. No, yeah, exactly. People want like a, like a teen's in their backyard doing soon.

like doing the Trump soup for your family bit, or they want to sit down for eight hours and watch The Haunted Fly Manor. They do not want to be like, I need 10 minutes of a deeply well done, you know, program. That's the absolute opposite. Apparently, though, maybe this is part of the reason why it went under, and I do, I understand.

So it started off with 50 original shows, and then another 125 we're supposed to be rolled out, this year and Katzenberg yes the same man when he was the head of Disney karma. Karma baby. Took out when love is gone yes it is karma so we'll take out Quibby and that is now

the whole thing comes full and I'm gonna say he made the right decision there but this was the wrong decision. Unbelievable Molly horrible like this he said people on Quibi have a hundred thousand dollars a minute to make content that doesn't exist on other platforms you're right

Jeffrey Katzenberg it doesn't exist on other platforms for a reason. Yeah. And I think it is just, it's hard to look at something because, again, I think it sucks when a bunch of people lose their jobs, especially this year. It is a rough time for employment, but it is pretty funny. This is why it's great. This is the hubris of it.

Because I'm also seeing this in, I feel like, the porn sex worker community with the advent of only fans. Finally, content creators are able to take the person. power back and away from these fucking old rich fuckers and get the money direct and i'm benefiting from it fucking so many people on only fans especially through the pandemic it's amazing to see people beautiful hot sexy people sharing their stuff and getting directo paydo for it as opposed to it going through this hierarchy of i'm going to say sort of old they're all the same color probably to a lot of them, you know what I mean?

And they're all stink dewards that run this bullshit that take out the heart of Muppet Christmas Carol. It is the fulcrum of the day new ma of Scrooge's journey. You're right. It is necessary to know Scrooge's journey. And I understand, Molly, that it is not for everybody. Not everybody wants to see it every time,

but how fucking dare you not include it? Yeah. the 20th anniversary DVD. Oh, right. You're right. I don't even support it this much, but fucking love to see it. Don't you throw me under the bus? Love to see it.

And honestly, if you are one of these rich old people, A, why are you listening to this show? It's very weird to me, okay? But B, just hire a bunch of 19 to 22 year, 18 to 22 year old, like, brainiac kids who know how to create apps. And let just be like, make whatever you want to make. I'll just sit in this room while you do it, and I get a cut. And one of them's going to create a TikTok. And can I also throw a C in there that if you're looking for a sugar baby, I am available. I've always wanted to be a sugar baby.

I'm ready for it. I remember when I first moved to L.A. And I was so sad. And every day, I looked at this billboard for sugarbabies.com. And the tagline said, never pay for anything again. Yeah, I never want to pay for anything ever again. There you go.

Sugar baby, Jackie. Yeah, this is why you're not going to get hired as a sugar baby. Yeah, this is all the stuff that sugar babies don't do. They play it cool. They sort of just go hang it. Also, you straight up have a boyfriend. So it doesn't make any sense. No, this is a side.

This is a side hustle. What are you talking about? I'm ready for a side hustle. and I taste like peppermint. I don't know if you heard that. I'm a bit of a, yeah. They call me Jingles for short. And Ms. Jingles loves to taste like,

taste suck on her own fingers, like their little, ooh, little candy thumbs. So if you don't mind me changing the subject. I could go forever. Everyone loves this vamp. Well, I was just going to say, speaking of another week shout. I got Molly, though.

I finally made Molly, though. I guess we'll call it another kind of side hustle when that dude jerked off on that Zoom call. I'm so excited. So you guys have to explain this to me because we are going to talk. We're going to talk about AOC on Twitch. But first, I don't know anything about this story because I live in pop culture land. Please explain this to me. Yeah.

So two things happened this week that are more in the realm of politics, but felt, but both of them when they happened, I was like, this is page seven material and I was so excited and we won't be super politicky about it we'll just focus on the jerking off and killing each other in a video game that's the thing it actually has nothing to do with politics like the aOC on twitch has more to do with politics if anything and that's just her being amazing and awesome and elhan omar too but like she's just like us just just like us but like actually just like us not like how politicians are like i'm just like you like here are two politicians who are legit like us but i'm getting out of myself but But so, and it's not this, yeah, this has nothing to do with politics, but this guy, Jeffrey

Tubin, who is a New Yorker, writes for the magazine, The New Yorker and also is a CNN contributor. He's like a legal analyst. He is like a guy you'll see on your TV if you, you know, have the news on, you know, throughout the day. and he there was so advice and I full disclosure I have a political podcast where I did already talk about this but I'm so excited I could talk about it so much there's just it's been three days of Jeffrey Toobin's dick discourse right now at least and so I'm yeah we're on day three so I'm so excited to continue to talk about it. There's no video of the incident is there because I'm not going to lie I tried to find it I heard that the Zoom was recorded but I don't know if that is uh That was just a rumor mill that I heard. I have no idea whether that's true or not. Gotcha. But so, so basically long story short, a TV legal analyst guy who goes on CNN, big serious

pundit guy, was on a call with the staff with like the staff of the New Yorker, which is, you know, like a prestigious magazine with like really, really, really good writers, like Masha Gess and Jalani Cobb, all these people who's on the Zoom call with them. They were doing a simulation, an election simulation. and each writer was role-playing a different entity. So this isn't just some... This is like a real meeting. This is like a performance.

Like this is... Yes, it's not just a meeting. It's like, it's a meeting with like, imagine if you're in this world, like imagine, yeah, the New Yorker, like, the biggest stars in political writing. Like, the most prestigious. Like, yes. Yeah, bro.

They're all on this call. So the first, the vice story that comes out Monday afternoon is Jeffrey Toobin has been suspended because of a Zoom incident involving his dick. And everyone was like, what? But there was no more information. And so he said, oh, this was such a silly, embarrassing mistake. And so I'm sitting here thinking, like, did he think his camera was off? And he just took his dick out to scratch himself or something. Like, what happened? But so then the story is updated Monday night to say that they were doing an election simulation. They were role playing, which my brother and I couldn't stop laughing about because we're like,

they were doing improv, basically. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They were having improv political time. And that got him all horny? Well, this is the question. I think that absolutely that's what got him horny. But so, but there's, there's an ambiguity about why he was so horny. But so he, so they were doing in this election simulation. Different, different, uh, all-star writers are playing different, um, like, entities. So somebody's playing the far right.

Somebody's playing the establishment Democrats. Oh my God, wait a second. This is exactly like what AOC was doing, except she was playing among us. Yeah, not masturbating. Yeah, crucially not masturbating. Where is the wolf and which one is an alien? And so as they're doing this role play on Zoom,

which, again, I don't even understand the point of the roleplay at all. And also a bunch of other staff from the New Yorker was on the call. In my brain, it was a lot like the secretary, though, you know, like someone had the red marker out, somebody's bending over being like, ooh, Mr. Pence, you're so bad. And he's like, oh, I'll make sure my wife's not in here. I desperately want to know the content of the role play because the fact that this happened during a role play but so then there's breakout rooms in the Zoom and I'm in grad school right now so I'm familiar with the breakout room

you're not done you're just going to a smaller Zoom meeting and so during the breakout room he disappears comes back his dick is out he's masquer he's jerking off his camera is pointed down at his dick so you can see why that why that's what I heard and I was like Why? Why would you do that?

And then, wait, the best part, my favorite part is that he, and if there's any updated reporting on this, feel free to check me. This was, I was following the story very closely Monday night, but have not followed it that closely since. But so he left the meeting and then had to ask to be readmitted, which is my favorite part, like to be in the waiting room. And then he comes back in seemingly not knowing what has, seemingly not knowing that he just, showed everyone with his camera tilted down that he was that he was rubbing one out. And so this all happened in a work meeting and his apology was like, oh, what a silly embarrassing

mistake. I'm so sorry. So right. So the question is, was he jerking it to the political role play that was happening or did he have another window open during the breakout room that he thought this is my chance to really get it done and then come back? I'm going to guess. If you're asking me a horny man who's never done this before though i will just throw that out there never thought to do it because this is the main thing you're like the real question should be like why would he why why would even it all be okay to do this period point blank you should be fired immediately yes waiting to your it during i don't care if your camera's off and you've muted properly it's completely inappropriate i don't care how horny you are you have to wait until

the end of the meeting yes or do it in the bath at least to take a shower at some point Go with your shower. And this is the thing, like, I'm all about doing stuff on company time, you know, take the poop, company time. Yeah. Jerk off on company time if you are alone in a room and no one else can see you. But yes, I agree with Holden 100%. There is no comment, whether he had a private chat going on or a porn window

or whether he meant for other people to see this. There is no context in which you are in a Zoom meeting. The little green light on your computer is there. And he said, I thought I had my video muted. well, if there is a chance that your video might be on, do not take your dig out in front of the entire staff of the New Yorker. Always check. You check 20 times.

I still check. I've got the cover over my videos. I also don't use, that is also, I think, another. I don't even do it in front of my webcam. I don't do it in front of my webcam at my computer. No. I have like a big awesome PC screen monitor, whatever. I don't care.

I don't care if the fidelity is better. I will do it away, away from. No, is it? What's that movie that like the creepy movie, the den? It's like there's lots of things you don't do in front of your camera. We all know that they're watching at all times. But that's, but usually for the most part, nobody gives a fuck if you're just jerking off in front of your video. They're not going to, they're not going to sneak in if they do.

I mean, for me personally, I'm like, well, I have that. But I would never do it during a Zoom meeting. Unless he has a king for like boring-ass shit, I'm going to guess he pulled up a different window of pornography. Yeah, I think unfortunately he wasn't hard due to him playing the role of the Supreme Court, which was what his role was in the role play. Yeah, but that's really sexy. I think there is a thing.

I mean, power is sexy. Also, I do get, I totally get that, like, can I get away with it? Oh, I'm being a bad boy. Then, like, that is a different form of kink that I completely understand. But again, do it right if you're going to do it. You triple, quadruple check that it's close. It's the same way where it's like it's why you always completely check, why I would always completely open my mom's door and look at him and go,

Mom, mom are you home and look through the entire house before I did anything I wasn't supposed to? You check. You don't just be like, well, she's not supposed to be here yet. Learn from when you're a teenager and your life is all. all shame. Yes. Yeah. I honestly,

my first reaction to this was that like, you know, if you are so horny that you want to try to like get it done during breakout rooms that you don't have to be a part of, like there's a part of me that wants to admire that, right? But again, you walk away from your computer. You're not going to put your coworkers in a situation where they accidentally see that.

It's just, you know, we can encourage the absolute relentless horniness. of it while also acknowledging this is not something that you do on a Zoom, but we're all on Zoom. And so we all know this, but then now there's been several days of like weird Jeffrey Tumin apology discourse of people being like, listen, let's not mock the guy. He must be embarrassed enough. And it's like, yee, you think you should probably be ridiculed if you take your dick out in front of all your coworkers. I just can't believe the part where he's like,

oh my God, how embarrassing as opposed to the part where he should have been like, oh, well, I guess I'm fired, right? I'm fired, right? Yeah, I think he is, I think he is either fired or suspended. Yeah, right now he's suspended, but I'm like, how, if I were him, I would have been like, well, see you later. Yeah. Yeah, well, he actually had a media appearance since this happened, which suggests that perhaps,

not since the story came out, but since his dick came out, his dick came out, he went on TV, the story came out, I think, a couple of days later. But yeah, the dude is not appearing to feel the amount of shame. I mean, can you imagine, Jackie, if we were having, if we were all just bantering right before we record page 7, we discovered that Holden, sorry to put you on the spot, Holden. No, yeah. But it would be a big problem. We would not just be like, eh, it could happen to anybody. Yeah, it would be an issue.

I mean, I know usually, like, our professional Zoom meetings include my brother, which obviously is when I'm like, you know what I need to get, I need to get my eel let loose down. I needed to slither out from underneath my little skirt. Yeah, we understand, Jackie. But I don't usually get horny when my brother's around. So this is a plus three. Maybe this is why I'm coming from a place. Because Molly, you also work with your brother. Maybe this is why we're not slapping our meats when we are in the middle of doing our work.

But Holden, what keeps you from doing it? Good question. I actually have talked about, like, how long ago I did Jay off at work. In the bathroom. Yeah, but it was still, I felt disgust. I felt like a disgusting animal about it. And I never did it again. It wasn't that like 14 years ago?

We're talking, dude, I'm in my early 20s and, you know, and I still am like, oh, I can't believe I did. If you are in private, I don't think that it's necessarily wrong to Jay off on company time. Again, it's fun to do things on company time you're not supposed to do. Like, if you are in. Especially if you can get off and it's a way, well, it's, you know, it's better in the at work. It's better than being under the influence of anything else. Like if that just, you know, helps you get through your afternoon shuffle, good on you. I mean, I don't know about y'all, but like there has been days or it was like torture. There's just something going on. I feel like,

especially when I'm like weirdly hung over certain days, I get this bizarre horniness that like I have been tortured with that when I worked in an office job before. It is painful. And it's like, and you live with it all day and then you go home and it's done in like five minutes and you're just like, God, that was all just for like five minutes of like mediocre jerking off. Just you to get it out. But it's so painful. So I get it when it's just neat. When you're just at a brink.

But you got to have that self-control. And you got to make sure you're not taking the risks. You know what I mean? And I don't care whatever. This happened. He fucked up. But the part where he's not just like, well, fired now, right? Everybody.

Sorry. You know, here's a letter to all the people that. had to see my dick get jerked off. Yeah, I feel like you should. If not, then you just leave. Just to save your own self after having exposed yourself. Show up the next day in a costume and pretend to be a completely different person. I mean, it is an absolute waking nightmare.

Like, imagine, like, again, I don't have any sympathy for this guy because I don't think that it's actually possible that if you are in breakout rooms, It is not, you don't have time to jerk off. But like, like, if you think you have time, if you think your camera's off, if you think that, and then you realize that every, all of these, you know, again, extremely prestigious writers can see you, like, that is, like, I feel like that's, like, when I was a kid, I would always have this reoccurring nightmare where I would, like, be doing normal things that I would look down and I would not be wearing pants, you know? Like, oh, yeah, classic.

Like, so. The old Donald's up syndrome. Yeah, yeah. It speaks to a primal fear of being like, what if people saw me do something they're not supposed to see. And so for that, there's part of me that feels like the slightest amount of like, well, that would suck. But then again, the rest of the sentence is just like, and that's why you don't jerk it on a Zoom meeting. Honestly, even underneath the article was an article about Cardi B who was in bed with offset, even though they just filed for DeFours. and she accidentally posted a nude picture of herself

when she was trying to post something real quick and she immediately deleted it. It did not matter. Millions of people saw it's like that kind of thing I have more sympathy for. I have way more sympathy for that. Yeah, or like Chris Evans, like the fun accidental Chris Evans dick pick was like,

it was great because nobody was forced to see that in a work meeting. That was just like people were like, oh, do I want to see Chris Evans' dick? And then he wasn't also like violated by it. He was like, oh, you want to see my dick, I guess? And then also he used it as a platform to be like, you, everybody should vote. Whether they would, that he designed it like that. But I really appreciated it.

At least he turned it into a positive for some, you know, for himself as much as he could. But there is no turning this into a positive. This is just like, dude, you just don't do it. I would even feel like better if I'd like walked in on him jerking off in his own office. Because it's like, at least, well, it's like you shouldn't, but at least. you're in your own office. Yes. Yes. Right. If you are in your own office, that is, yes. What do you think I'm doing right now? I'm in my own office. Zoom's up here. You don't move the camera down. You can't see what's slipping and sliding down, yon. And, you know, I'm sure a

philosopher could talk about, you know, the kind of flattening of our different spaces, because there used to be your work office where you could jerk off, your home office where you could jerk off, your home bedroom where you could jerk off. Now where do we jerk off. Now you're always at work. So you've got to find, you know, separation of work life, professional life, home life. No, that's why I got my fucking, my nub and rubbing corner. Yeah, you got to create these spaces, you know, now that space is flattened, I get it. But again, if you are in a Zoom call doing a political election simulation and you're in breakout rooms, breakout rooms don't last that long.

Usually there's a timer on them. Oh, is that what breakout rooms are? Because I don't use those things. I don't know what that begins. Yeah. So it's like, you know, let's say it's you, me and Holden, and let's say Henry is here too. And we're like, okay. No.

He's jerking off in this situation. Okay, not Henry. Eddie, Eddie. Eddie is here. He's masturbating. All right. Ed's ripping away at his hog. We go.

We go. If there's one thing, I'm always like, oh, Ed Larson, Roundtable of a gentleman, horniest man I've ever met. Yeah, you can't get close to him. He's so horny. If the four of us were in a meeting, the brink. We could have breakout rooms like if Holden was like, you know what? I want us to discuss. I want Holden and Jackie to discuss the Muppet Christmas Carol.

And I want Eddie and Molly to discuss the Muppets take Manhattan. The song stays. And then you virtually are put into another Zoom meeting, basically. That's all it is. But there's usually a little timer and it says like 60 seconds until you get back, put back in the main room. Gotcha. There you go. Well, that's kind of fun.

I think that this man should be fired, and I think that we all learned a very valuable lesson. He learned it for us, and I think that I guess AOC... A lesson I didn't actually never need to learn because I just never would have thought to ever do that. Now you all know. And I hope that if you did want to do that, that you learned a lesson,

and hopefully AOC learned a lesson while she was playing among us. Now, I've been desperately begging Holden for me to play among us with him, but he's scared of me and my strength, and I understand. If you would like to come on this Tuesday, we'll talk about it. It's now becoming a weekly thing with a bunch of friends. We've got finally a full house. It's a total of 10 you can play with.

Can you just quickly explain what a bonus is? So, Amongus is just like all those games, mafia, the newer popular one is Secret Hitler. There's all these games where one person is an imposter or murdering everybody, and everybody's trying to suss out who it is. In this case, it's a video game. You're all on a ship. The people who aren't the impostors, imposter or impostors.

With 10 people, it's better to play with two or three impostors. It makes a little more species spicy. But either way, if you're not the imposter, you're just walking around, doing tasks on the ship. If everybody does enough tasks, you can win that way. Or you win by figuring out who the imposters are. The imposters are, meanwhile, going around, killing people and causing havoc on the ship.

You can sabotage the ship to get people to have to run to a certain part of the ship to try to, like, fix the oxygen supply, yada, yada, yada, which you used to manipulate as well. So this was a game that was like just getting so popular. Everybody's been saying the term suss lately, short for suspicious, like Jackie's suss. I can see Jackie's shoulders moving up and down. She's being very suss. You're a suss, bitch. I think she's masturbating on the Zoom call. Oh, my God.

I always do that. I go, I go lift and drop, lift and drop, lift and drop, lift and drop, and then I come. I'm sorry, I was lifting and dropping my shoulders while I was saying that. So one thing, and then AOC then did a stream, she was just like, I saw the tweet. She was like, hey, want to help me get the vote out? Like, let's do, I've got, you know, I want to do a Twitch room among us. Huge name Twitch people, like, Pokemon, there's like a bunch of other ones like, came, you know, answered the call.

Also, who was the other representative that was, do you know, Molly, off the top of your head? There was another- It was-I-O-Mar. Yes, and she also played with everybody. I watched last night. Yeah, Molly? And not only was Il-Han Omar playing, but she has this incredible kid. So if you know AOC, but you don't know Ilhan Omar, she's like very, they're very similar, like, political figures, both super progressive, amazing, funny, really, really cool people. and but Ilhan Omar also has a kid, a 16 year old.

And so her 16 year old was like making fun of her on Twitter. Like, oh my God, my mom is playing Twitch. This is so, my mom was on Twitch playing Among Us. This is like a fever dream. Like this is so embarrassing. She doesn't know what she's doing. So then like a few hours into it, Ilhan's kid, Isra, also started playing. I love that.

That's awesome. And I watched a bunch of it too. I was watching it live while I was happening. I was literally streaming among us during it. And by the way, shout-outs to all the people who watched our stream over that stream, because honestly, I was even saying like, wow, I can't believe she's doing this right now. We should really be watching this right now. But a lot of people stuck around for our streaming of Among Us as well. I just want to say shout-outs, though, to AOC, because she's legit.

This is not just like, hello, fellow kids. I would like to play on Twitch. She's even talking about during lockdown, she's been playing the fuck out of League of Legends, a game that is, I find to be impeneture. like she's legit a gamer legit like knows what she's doing you know it's not like any other politician I've seen before in this sense that she is completely she is

actually legitimately with it Biden does have an animal crossing island so he knows he I bet he's been playing animal crossing this entire time if there is a man that loves to I feel like relax with little

cartoons it seems like like it's him. This is the thing. Like, it's there, it is so rare in our life, like, to, for me, like, I don't think I've ever in my life have I, like, really identified, like, truly identified with a politician. Like, there are four that I can name that I've been moved by all of whom, you know, two of them are AOC and I'll Hile. Eleanor Roosevelt. Eleanor Roosevelt. No, like, like Bernie, it's like Bernie and then it's AOC, L.C. Ilhan and Rashida Talib. Like those are the only four politicians I've ever been like,

I am truly moved by you. But like with Bernie, it's like, I love the guy. But I've never like looked at Bernie and been like, I want to hang out with him. But it's different. Like with AOC, it's just like she's just like so cool. Like you just want to be her friend. Like it's just incredible.

And the same with Ilhan. And then this kid, this 16 year old kid comes in. I think she's 16. She's a teen, you know. And she like is joining in and like dragging her. mom and they're like, it was so fun. That's awesome. All day I keep thinking about it and getting this big dumb smile on my face because it was

so sweet and fun and it's so different for politicians to like you said, to not be like, hello, fellow kids. Yeah. Yeah. But nobody got angry because the thing is that in hearing about this game, it sounds like it's a perfect game for me to break the computer in. Yes. And I'm excited for that.

If you watch us streaming it, we are, I mean, they're definitely a, a lot of professional pro pro pro Twitch streamers that make hundreds of thousand dollars a fucking month doing it so you know and they're definitely keeping

their you know no one was like I didn't notice any cursing or anything like that they were definitely keeping it very like clean and friendly there were some really funny times though there was a moment when it was it was down to three people left

and it was AOC and Ilhan and one like Twitch streamer dude and he was like oh fuck man I don't know. I just like freaking out. Like trying to figure it out. Because also what you're doing is you're like voting each other off.

And that's your a lot of the screaming comes from is you call these. You either report a body and everybody just goes straight into a meeting and you start talking. Or someone hits the emergency meeting button because they saw something or they're just very suspectful of someone. You go ahead and try and put me out of the ship. You know. I'm not going without a fucking fight. I'm already mad. You were just thinking about you trying to get rid of me.

Are you good at line? Are you good at the lying end of it? Yeah. Oh, yeah, I'm chaos. No one knows if they can trust me. I go in lying from the start. That's how you do it. Be the first to accuse, too.

Yes, I'm, and I am, yeah, I want to be chaos reigns. Yeah. But the problem is that the second chaos rains turns back on me is when I break the computer in half. I have anger issues. I don't know if I have told you guys about this before. It's very difficult for me to play games. I almost ripped up the cranium board last time.

played it. And I'm trying to get better at it because this is a thing. So you're telling me about this game. And I know that I talked about this on our gloss Twitch stream, but we were playing my family because Henry and I are also, you know, I told you guys before board games were banned at our household. We are not board game people. But we were playing the shining board game, which is, it's nothing like that. But essentially, the house is the board game. And you are all going mad because you're all the innkeepers, but you're working together against the house to keep you from going mad. I'm so much better at those games.

Like, if we're working together to kill something or go against something, that's my jams. I'm like, I got you, boy. I'll never let you go, Holden. It'll be a lot. I've got room on the door, Molly. Yeah, I know my Mimi's. And I think that if we could just, can we just change the game? I don't know Molly, Jackie seems a little suss right now, right?

Don't you dare. She doesn't want to play a different game. Don't you dare? I think it's, all right, I'm voting Jackie. Are you voting Jackie, Molly? No. I think I vote Jackie too. I'm slippery at best.

I'm never sussed. I'm always slippery. It's because you can't nail me down. I had never heard this game until last night and now I'm like, I totally want to play it. Like, watching these. It's, it's free on phones. You don't even have to have a computer. Yeah, it's free.

So everybody can play. you can hop on a Zoom if I've got you know I'll let you know whenever we play because it's legitimately fun and everyone screams each other. I also love the dynamic, a couple things. I love the dynamic of like if you're a quiet person though, you've got to play

the quiet person game. That would be like our friends Drew or Walter they're kind of more quiet during the thing and they have a whole different angle. I'm one of the loud mouths so I have to play the game. Wait, Holden you are one of the loud mouths. But that means that if I'm the loudmouth,

imposter I can't just all of a sudden be Mr. Quietly. If we were in person I would give you a high five. Thank you. Zoom high five. No rubsies here. The other thing I love about the AOC thing is that for once, and I want to go back and watch every time she's the imposter,

for once, we get to watch someone who, a politician who is literally supposed to be lying. So I get to see her lie. And I wish every politician was forced to play a bug us. Just that I could see all of them when they're supposed to be lying lie. so I could see how they lie

because it would inform a lot just in the future. See, Ben, that's fun. That's, oh wait, so, I'm sorry, I know now we're just getting into this game. Wait, so you switch every time? Yeah, so the rounds, like a game will be pretty quick, like, ish.

It's like 15 minutes, maybe, maybe 20 before you're, yeah, so you're, and then, and you're, it's random. So I played for an entire hour and never been the imposter, but like, or you could be the imposter twice, in a row and be like, oh, which is great. You know what I mean? Because you could throw people off really bad. And, you know, AOC, if there's any politician who will show up on page seven, you know,

more than once, it's her because she also, after there was a Republican who called her a bitch a couple months ago, maybe, two, three months ago. And she made TikTok, I think it was TikTok, maybe it was an Instagram, but she made a video of her, like, basically like vogging along to Doja Cat's boss bitch. song so she's like she's great she's just so extremely with it in a way that is uh just so so so so so so satisfying hell i love it and and it makes i just you can tell watching her play like she's just so so genuine and and awesome so and like uh and she's just like me and now i'm running for congress and if you'd like to vote for me yeah good grads what's your platform i don't know

how to do uh my platform treat everybody as good as you would on your worst day. Oh. That's a nice platform. Is that good? Is that a good thing? I feel like that's a car.

I am not a car guy. No more cars. I like it. Oh, that's fun. Yeah, I will have a designated one designated car city if you're like a big gear head. You can go live there.

We'll put it in Arizona or something, but you know, open flat areas. You could go there. Everybody else, we're going to have crazy good public transportation. That's great. I'm going to have a chauffeur. program where everybody in this country will get their own chauffeur.

Okay, I was with you until a chauffeur. Yeah. And it will be prisoners. And we'll get rid of the prison system and they will be chauffeurs. See, that's so much smarter. You lost me. I agree with the getting rid of the prison system. Don't agree with the chauffeur part.

All right, you can choose between cobbler or chauffeur. It's up to you. No, I say mandatory crafting. I say mandatory crafting because you, You girl just bought a bedazzler, and I bought it off-brand bedazzler. I can't even believe I didn't start with this. Wow. And now I have stones to put onto things.

I am covered in Little Burns. You think, oh, no, that's why, because I didn't buy an actual bedazzler, because they don't really sell those anymore. I bought like a heat up the gems center. I was going to say, is it just hot glue and gems? It's essentially hot glue and gems, except I bought a little thing for it. And I'm covered in Little Burns, and I'm the happiest I've ever been. You wait, I'm going to put the word bitch on every mask I own.

I am going to start bedazzling absolutely everything. I'm gearing up for 2021's fashion trend, hint, hint. And now this is what I do in my free time. And I say in my political platform, mandatory crafting has to happen. It's helping my brain. It's keeping me from just watching television. and also got me through watching Lepricon 4 in space last night, which was rough.

It was funny. It was very funny, but it was rough to watch pretty much alone while you're rhinestoning. I watched Fright Night last night alone for the first time, and Fright Night's fun. Fright Night is a lot of fun. It is the opposite of Lepercon 4 in space, although maybe not.

I've been watching The Haunting of Blind Manor, and I'm so excited, A, to be watching something that other people are watching as other people. We're watching it. And B, it's spooky. Yes, I watched the first episode. I need to get into it because, of course, I was really stoned when I watched the first episode.

I was like, why they're British? There wasn't British in the last one. I don't understand why she got gray hair now. And I was just far too stone because I didn't realize they were playing different characters. Why they're British? Why they're British? She's so pretty. Carla Gugino's so pretty.

She is pretty. She's so pretty. She's just, it started in son-in-law and it will never stop. I love her so much. She's so beautiful. She's begging for a little kiss. And I'm begging to ride. I need to bring this up because this sounds so fucking cool.

Because in Dubai, they are creating a choose-your-own adventure, John Wick roller coaster. And I feel like of all over the action movie franchises, I do talk about John Wick the most because it's my favorite and because Keanu Reeves is perfect and now they're starting a roller coaster where when you get in line you can choose whether you're hunting John Wick or whether you're helping

John Wick and isn't that fucking sick? When you said it was a choose your adventure I was like oh cool I bet everybody gets some kind of like pad where like at some every point at different points to the ride they get to all like vote on where they're going to go next like but no it's literally just do you want to be like the John Wick

in the story or do you want to be like the bad Some day we will. Isn't that what the, what are they called? Glasses, glasses and then you're in it? Virtual reality. Hed sets? Them. Glasses and then you're in it?

Yeah. Claces and then you're in it. It's pretty descriptive. I mean, you completely understood what I was saying. Glasses and then you're in it. And it's just like a, I see, we, how do we get those? Can you, can the laymen buy those now? Yeah.

Yes, I'm actually looking at potentially good. an Oculus 2 or whatever it is, the one that recently came out. Actually, I was literally looking at that earlier today. And so now Facebook gets to show me every two seconds in advertisement for Oculus. I'm so sick of it. If I look up anything, if I have the barest interest in anything, I get inundated with these ads. You just said the word, and now the people that listen to this episode are also going to get that. Yes, they are.

Because that's what happened. What was happening with Rocky Horror? There was something that were, oh, because. don't dream it be it. The slogan from Rocky Horror came from an old Fredericks of Hollywood ad. And I said that

maybe this is going to happen to you now too. This is the grand experiment because I'm so old and this shit still kind of boggles my mind. We said that and then many people hit me up

and they were like oh I got an ad for Fredericks of Hollywood. I've never looked at Fredericks of Hollywood after you talked about it in a podcast. What?

And it wasn't even on like Spot of everything. It was on a separate it was on like Instagram or something. some shit. Isn't that any... Like that, I don't...

I really truly don't get how that works. Why, how is that a thing? Oh, wow. This is a pretty saucy... Are you looking at Fredericks of Hollywood right now? I don't know. Yeah, dude.

You ever go into a Fredericks of Hollywood? I've bought all of my cheapest shrily... Hold on. I have to turn my camera off for a second, but I'm not doing anything strange. Molly help. Molly, stop him. He's juicy. He means to be...

milked. That's all I had to say about that. I want to be on roller coasters. We're not going to be on any roller coasters anytime soon. I do want to say a quick shout out to Victoria, who hit us up on page seven podcast at gmail.com that gave us a little insight into the world of celebration during COVID. Speaking of wanting to go on rides and us screaming about Celebration Village last week, apparently it's just really boring right now because it's COVID.

But nothing's really mandatory. and or happening. So, although now that Florida is completely open, I'm not going to start screaming about that because I save that for my screams towards my family. I guess you can go to Disney World. It's Disneyland that's still shut. That's, yes.

After we talked about it, I realized it was Disney. I was like, I saw this extremely dystopian ad for Disney World being open. And it was all of them like, we're so magical and fun. We're wearing our masks. Come, come, come. That's what says fun to me, masked people.

But I will say, going back to the sugar baby thing, too, you should definitely go to Dubai. If you want to become a sugar baby to some sort of a prince or something, you know what I mean? I'll go be a Lilo. I'm going to start yachting, get thee to a Liloery, and that is Dubai. And I'm excited about it.

I don't think that, I'm pretty sure I would be arrested. because I don't have any clothes that don't show my breasts. Jackie, do you have any other celebrity slices before I speak towards my conspiracy of the week? Slicy, slice, I'm ready for your dicey. Celebrity conspiracy number 26. What is it? Britt can't come to the phone right now. Why?

Because she's dead. Wait, Britney Spears is there? Britney Spears? Yes. What? This one comes in, by the way, from Victoria, who says, I found this conspiracy years ago, and it is so stupid and funny, and I just need other people to know about it. Also, I love you guys in the podcast, and my birthday is this Monday, and I'm so excited to spend it listening to Twilight.

So thank you so much for that. Happy birthday, Victoria. Also, page 7 podcast. At gmail.com. I'm loving this, because honestly, I have hit such a bottom of the barrel at this point. with celebrity conspiracy. So you guys are like giving me life right now to use a phrase. I hate because it's an interactive thing.

Not that you weren't doing a great job, Holden, but the email is the best thing to happen to a celebrity conspiracy corner, I think, because you had found all of the good ones. It's so good. And also, if you want to send blind items that way, feel free or just these really nice shoutouts, just nothing mean. And we'll love you forever. No, but I love crying in the middle of a day.

Page the number seven podcast at. Gmail.com, by the way. So there you go. All right. Here is the overview. Britney Spears became a smash hit with her album and song Baby one more time at the age of 16 in 1999 and went on to have a long-lasting career as a pop star with several worldwide hits. Or did she? This theory was posted in 2008 on the GameSpot.

Internet forums, by the way, GameSpot is like a video game magazine. I have no idea why this would be posted there of all places, but either way, this was posted by user Silver Dragon 17 who wrote, Upon some stressing research, I have discovered a shocking truth. Britney Spears is dead. I hope to prove to you how we have been lied to by the Bush administration like sheep.

Because if you remember, by the way, she was also a secret agent for the Bush administration. That was one of the earliest celebrity conspiracies we did. The one we've been calling Brittany may be not a girl and not yet a woman, but she is an imposter going back to Among Us. She is, she is a corpse. And I have the evidence to prove it.

His theory states that just after she wrapped on Baby One More Time, the video shoot, she was, quote, only 16 and not yet licensed to drive, borrowed her mother's car to go joyriding with Justin and the passenger seat. She's with Justin Timberlake, right? Brittany lost control the car. Brittany was decapitated in the accident. Justin was severely burned, received massive head injuries, and has since been in a coma.

He has not expected to recover. Since they had already invested so much money on the project, and because, quote, it's a known fact that teenagers in the late 90s did not listen to dead people. Only teenagers and only in the late 90s did not listen to dead people. In parentheses, just look how poorly Janice Joplin and Jim Grochie have done in the teenage market lately. I was going to say, that's totally not true. I feel like there was a total 60s nostalgia vibe in the late 90s of listening to Janice Joplin in particular.

That's true. They had no other option but to replace Brit Brit, Brit, with a girl named Brittany Shears, whose Uncle Billy Shears replaced Paul McCartney after his death in 1966. Again, we covered on this show. Wow. Now, here's another little factoid.

I love that they didn't get somebody who looked like her where they got somebody whose name sounded like her. Named sounds just like her. And then they just probably completely altered her entire appearance. By the way, one snag in the plan, and you'll know this if you listen to our pop history on Britney Spears that this was a big part of her story. One snag in the plan, however,

was that she had larger breasts than the original, which is why the label started that boob job rumor. Oh. Yeah. From silver, this is from Silver Dragon 17. I have never trusted a person more. It's Silver Dragon.

17 posting on the GameSpot, Interdron. internet forum back in 2008. Of course, another problem concerned Justin Timberlake, this Super Dragon Talk. How does a comatose singer remain in a really hot band, in parentheses, other than just doing really mellow music? Great, great caveat. But it was easily solvable. And this is where the shade for boy bands and pop music at this time comes in.

Justin has been replaced at various times with members of the Backstreet Boys, 98 degrees LFO and O-Town. No one has noticed the difference since they all look and sound alike anyways. Okay, that's my favorite. In fact, most of the popular boy bands in the day are comprised of only about

12 different individuals all together. What? I love the Silver Dragon 17. Silver Dragon 17. Silver Dragon 17's perception of like faces is so fluid. I love that they just think that

like anyone can be anybody. I think it actually is kind of poetic. Yeah, it's beautiful, really, if you think about it. That's the word I was thinking of poetic. So here's, would you like to hear the evidence? Yeah, of course. Give me your final verdict on this. Oh, my God.

He cites clues in her video Silver Dragon, that is, such as in the one for Lucky, where she plays two roles, a reference to the dead Britney and her replacement. And also there's the video for stronger in which she's driving a car and it spins out of control. Whoa.

Then there's also, this is the capper, this is the file a little bit, then there's the messages found by playing her songs backwards. And the second chorus of Oops I Did It Again, you can clearly hear a disembodied voice saying, Oops, I got decapitated in a car accident. What? Yeah. And then she also, she has her cover of satisfaction, right?

And the talking at the beginning of satisfaction, A voice says, Britney is dead, girl, like, oh my God. But this is if you play it backwards, right? Yeah. Wow. So I'll have to test that out. If anybody wants to test that out. I don't know if it's true or not until we test it out, Holden.

How does one play things backwards? I think you have to have a record player. Especially now. Oh, my God. Holden McNeely and Molly Neffel. Eddie Larson got me. Oops, I did it again. on vinyl. We can test this.

I am going to test it and I will get back to you next week. I've got it on vinyl. I will check it for all of us. It's the second chorus of Oops I did it again. The second one. And it's the talking at the beginning of satisfaction. All right. I'm writing this down. This is our first fact checking of a celebrity conspiracy theory.

Fact check. Well, I know we don't have all the facts in front of us but now I implore you both. Do you believe this is real? Do you believe Sinister Dragon has found the terrifying truth? You know, I was about to be ready because of that video, that other conspiracy theory of where Justin Deberlake got so sad when you mentioned Brittany in that interview. But it turns out that's not even him.

That's somebody else. And so... That's a guy from LFO. The guy from LFO wishes, all right? I am unfortunately. gonna have to put this in the category of I want to believe, but I don't. It's a very X-Files situation. Jackie. I refuse to respond until I fact-check it myself.

Good answer, Jackie. You don't have enough information yet. No, we're putting breasts on the shelf right now, and we will come back to this next. There you go. I mean, there's a lot of stuff in there, the boob job scandal. You know? Right. She could not have gotten a boob job.

There's no way she got a boob job. Right. Yeah, dog. Well, thank you so much. You just blew all of our minds. And I, again, I'll let you know. And if you out there also have a vinyl of Britney Spears, please check it out yourself.

We'll all do a little bit of a fact-checking mission this week. Now we have something fun to do besides watching the world burn. Isn't that kind of fun? Sure. But now it's time for the list. Oh, who's on the list? It's a day. You gotta have that list.

Yeah, we're gonna keep going through the fascinating facts about your favorite horror movies. Dude, I watch Exorcist over the weekend that fucking movie every time. So good. So fucking good. Always.

Another one of the top three. And another one of those movies that also is ever, forever so good is the shining. Something I did not realize that apparently, although he never openly admitted to it, that Stanley Kubrick wrote every single,

five of the 500 pages of all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy on his own typewriter. And I think that that, of all the weird things we've heard about Stanley Kubrick, I think this might be one of my favorite ones, that he wanted to do it himself. He knew exactly how it wanted to be done. And he never addressed the question of whether or not he did do this, but none of the prop department did.

So someone must have done it. Wow, that's so awesome because, I mean, just from a like worker perspective, I feel like not making somebody else do that and being like, no, I have to do it. It's so nice. It is really nice. I mean, I think it's also a control issue. I think he was an insane perfectionist. It wasn't a labor issue.

Yeah. He wanted it exactly the way he wanted it to be, but it was a big part of the movie. That is a fun fact. this kind of sucks that the ending of Psycho was spoiled months before the film's release. Despite Hitchcock's fervent and admirable attempts at keeping the project a secret, both Variety and the Hollywood Reporter published very thorough spoilers regarding the psycho plot months before the film actually came out. That sucks, dude.

I will never forgive the film reviewer and the Charlotte Observer. Whoa. I went the day, Blair, I had opening night tickets to see. see Blair Witch Project and we decided to like read I guess the review or whatever the hype article about it and they totally just ruined the fact that it's not actually real. I'm

so angry at that so I could totally understand people's ire at this psycho thing. I can't even imagine that because I was the perfect age when Blair Witch Project came out and I remember seeing in the movie theater and I did because I must have been 10. Like I was definitely probably too young to see it

but I went with my mom and And I went with Henry and I, I mean, you did. Like, we thought it was real. It was one of the craziest between that and Scream. Those are two movies. I'll never forget seeing in the movie theater because Scream also just blew my fucking mind as well. That, like, that's, like, why also as a film critic, wouldn't you want people to have the same experience that you have? Whoever that person is, I hated every opinion they ever had.

And it was so funny because my dad, I would be like, I'm going to. goes, I want to, can we, you know, we'd be deciding on what movie to go to? I'm like, we should go see this. It's supposed to be great. And he's like, well, the guy and the Charlotte Observer said it was terrible. And I'm like, Dad, I've never agreed with that person, ever, forever. I'll never agree with them. Why would you use them as a reference? Ooh, ooh, dads. Dads. Dads. Apparently, Stephen Spielberg thought his DVD copy of paranormal activity was haunted. As the urban legend goes, Spielberg, whose DreamWork studio was considering distributing paranormal activity,

took a DVD of the movie home to watch, but then got freaked out when the door to his bedroom locked by itself. So the whole story about how the doors to his bedroom got locked from the inside, personally, I believe it. Some fucker-told movie phone. It's not something the marketing department just came up with before releasing the movie. I don't know why they have a quote from someone that is not Steven Spielberg talking about this. in the middle of this. Spielberg famously though carried the DVD to work in a trash bag

because he thought it was haunted. Despite the shock, Spielberg loved the movie and suggested a new ending that was used in the theatrical release. That's another one of my favorite. I always forget which one is my favorite of the paranormal activity endings, but there are three different ones

and I love every time because you never quite know which one it's going to be. I know that it's like, oh, if it's on the DVD, oh, if it's on, but I forget which one it's going to be, so I always get excited. and surprised. Another fun fact that speaking of Scream,

Drew Barrymore was supposed to play Neve Campbell's part. Wow. And that she backed out of the lead five weeks before production, but then they asked her to play her famous scene of the very beginning

and to stump everybody, because that did, again, that changed the game for horror movies for me. Honestly, you just brought up Psycho. Psycho was the original of that. Yes. Remember because she gets killed super

early on and she was top billing for that movie as well. That was purposely done by Hitchcock. And also took a note out of her book and had Drew Barrymore as the face of the movie in terms of posters and advertising. And then boom! Off before the opening credits! The best. That scene will still

I watched Scream what, for the first time since, you know, middle school maybe three years ago or something. I'm sorry I was about it on show, but like, I, it still just scares the absolute shit out of me. That scene is so, so fucking scary. So well done. The pacing is perfect in that. And Drew Barrymore kills it. And also even just the idea we were watching when a stranger calls, which to me is still, and it's also another one of those phone, phone ringing, being harassed over the phone. And I wonder now, I guess it's not the same for the younger generation because they don't have a house phone. But growing up

in a home with a house phone and I can't imagine and then you're like, you're tethered to it and the idea that you can't leave but you have to keep talking and like it still is just yucky and I will end this

with that Sissy Spaceic was adamant that her own hand appear in Carrie's final scene. I was just talking about this with Henry Carrie still holds the fuck up guys. Carrie is just I don't know why I just assumed it was one of those like, I mean, it was great when we were a kid, but like, you know the ending.

And I watched it again, so fucking good. So apparently, though Brian DePama wanted to get a stunt person for the final scene where Sue Snell visits Carrie's grave, Spacic insisted that it needed to be her hand that was shown, which required her to be buried in the ground. Spacic said, I laughed about that. I do all my own foot and handwork and always have. I wonder why that specifically,

and I guess maybe she doesn't do her own butt work or her own breast work, which I completely understand. I guess I'd also do all my own foot and handwork, if required. So that's something Sisy's basic and I have in common. That's my last... Yeah! Also, speaking of scary movies, I do want to give another shout out to Whitney from Unconventional Cookies.

I posted about these insane. cookies that she made for us that she sent of all these different horror, like very detailed, beautiful cookies, one of also the three of us as well. And I need to post pictures of the three of us because I've never seen cookies so detailed. It was really, it blew my mind, even down to the Reagan puking poltergeist one and the Carrie one, which came with a separate pig's blood that you could squirt all over it. I just wanted to say thank you. And if you, and if you're you ever need like insane cookies. I'm assuming you take design work, Whitney,

but unconventional cookies, you can follow her on Instagram. Hell yeah. I can't see. Uh-oh. So I think I'm going. Oh, God. Blind.

Items. And I'm so... We can't see them. And I'm so happy we're going a little over because one of my blind items was super fucking weak, so I'm only giving you two this week. I was actually hoping for this exact scenario

because one of mine was so weak. So this is great. Okay. Blind item number one. This foreign-born former boy bander slash sometime actor is having trouble getting the projects he wanted because the A-plus list mostly movie actor holds a big grudge. This is so weird, by the way. I don't, I want even maybe fans to talk to me about this if you know more about this weird situation. But either way, foreign-born, former boy-bander slash sometime actor, mostly boy-bander, he's former, but he's got his own solo. career and it's hot right now.

I would say. Zane. No. Harry Styles. Yes. I was close. And then a person I wouldn't think would be in any way connected to him, but it is an A plus list mostly movie actor, but does a lot of like movie producing.

He's like much older, silver fox, um, mostly movie actor, dude. George Clooney? Yeah. Whoa. But wait. What? Why would he hold a grudge, right? Well, this is apparently.

apparently this is due to Clooney being replaced by Harry Styles and some kind of a third for the for a married couple that is Cindy Crawford and this guy Randy Gerber and I can't tell if it's like a friendship thing or like a weird sex triangle like a third but apparently Clooney hates Harry Styles because like this Randy Gerber guy replaced him and like you styles and Gerber were seen out like bike writing shirtless and having a good old time together and I'm like perplexed as to how these two have anything to do with each other that Clooney is like pissed at him

because of a weird either sex or just pure friendship triangle thing but like the third spoke was replaced by styles it's it's odd I did a little digging and it's fucking weird I don't know what's going on it seems like he's becoming I'm just this very quick while you are saying this I'm looking this up

it seems like George Clooney's pissy because he's hanging out with his BFF when he wants to hang out with him. It's literally just a weird high school friend thing.

Yeah like might be exactly like how I say the grown people shouldn't have best friends that these seemingly grown adults do sort of have that going on and there's weird friend jealousy happening but I don't know if Cindy Crawford's in the mix

and maybe they're all fucking. But I also wonder, Harry Styles must be friends with Kaya Gerber, who is, who is in once upon a time in Mexico, like who has been, I believe she was dating Pete Davidson. Like, I wonder if they are friends. Maybe. She's in the mix. The daughter's in the mix.

I know that. But I don't, I don't know to what extent. I love the idea of having a rivalry, a friend, a best friend rivalry with somebody who's like probably 45 years younger than you. Yeah. That's got a hurt, you know. The hell. It's very strange to me.

Oh, I lied about her being in. No, I was thinking of, oh, God, Groundhog Day. Her daughter was in Once Upon a Time in Mexico. Andy McDowell? Andy McDowell's daughter. But the daughter, I do know the daughter was brought up as like maybe a friends with styles or something. Yeah, she's like a model or something. Either way.

Anyways, if anybody has more information on that. I am ageous now. If they are under the age of like 24, I'm like, I don't know. It's very odd. They look, they're beautiful. If you have any more information, page the number seven podcast at gmail.com, please, the numerical number. I feel like I should have just done it all spelled out because then I could have just said

all spelled out. But whatever, who cares. Mistakes are made. Either way, here's the second blind item. Mistakes are made. Usually I don't do the, usually I don't do the A plus or minus, but I do consider this actress to be a minus, if not B plus. This A minus list act.

actress is complaining about spending so much time at home with her significant other and kids and needing a break. By the way, this one goes out to you, Molly. The actress has filmed, gone on multiple vacations, and has a ton of household staff with multiple houses she owns. Police. And she's out there complaining about all this. Please.

A minus. And I have some juicy quotes for you, Molly, that will make your head steam. Who is an actress that is a, that Holden would want to. to specify is A minus. Because I feel like she hasn't been in anything. Maybe you'll correct me, but she hasn't been in anything good for a very long time. She was more of a teenage heartthrob when we were teenagers. Like, she was, like, she was very pretty.

She's in a, Katie Holmes. No, similar ballpark. She was in a really bad superhero movie. This is the one thing I know about her. She's in a lot of those, like dumb. She was in a lot of those. She was in a lot of those, like, dumb.

Is that a good superhero movie? No, no, wait a. before Bree Larson. Like, she was a lot of those dumb, like, romantic comedies for teenagers back when we were teenagers. Kirsten Dunst. No, similar ballpark. Oh, my God, I can't believe I wasn't right. Less talented. Less talented.

Yes, okay. Kirsten Dunst is talented. I like Kirsten Dunst. I'm a Kirsten Dundt. But just your description of, like, superhero movies and teen comedies is Kirsten Dunst. She was in one of the worst superhero movies, though, ever. I mean, so is Kirsten Dund. Honestly, Molly, that was a very good.

That was very good. Spider-Man 3 probably, right? Yeah, yeah. that is a good one. Spider-Man, no, the first two Spider-Man with her were good.

I mean, I can get more specific. She's sort of like, she's like tan. She sort of has that like California surfer girl vibe. Megan Fox? No, God.

She was, I'm trying. Give us better than tan. She was in Fantastic Four. Fantastic Four. Really bad. Bad, bad, bad, bad. Oh, I don't remember Fantastic Four.

Okay. I have to look up her Everyone is screaming right now Everybody's bad I know everyone's gonna message us About how they were screaming I'm cheating right now My name is Jessica Alba

And I had absolutely You could not You can tell Gun to my head Could never have I didn't know she was in the Fantastic Four I don't know anything about her career She's had a bit in so many news

But like she's not good right Can we all agree? I know that she has like an environment mentally friendly, like, mommy line now. I know that about her. Is she the honest company? Is that her? Yeah, that's her, right?

She does the diapers. I don't know any of that stuff. She's such, like, a non-thing to me. Like, talk about, like, beyond Starbucks. I mean, she's sexy and Sin City. I think that she's perfect in Sin City. Yeah, she was good in Sun City, but, I mean, she's not even Starbucks. She's like Dunkin' Donuts.

You know what I mean? She's like. But what about the movie, Honey? 2003. So either way, Molly, this is why I said this one goes out to you, because listen to this fucking shit. Recently, she made these comments to People

magazine. Rich as fuck, has multiple houses, like, whatever. She said, real talk, I told everyone in the family that I need a break from them, said Alba, who is mom to son Hayes, Alba, two and a half, and daughters Haven, Gardner, nine, and Honor, Marie, 12.

To escape from their day-to-day duties, Alba and close friends Kelly Sawyer planned a mom vacation. She said, we're going to go away for a week, and I don't really know what we're getting ourselves into. I just know, I can't be around my family anymore because I've literally had it. I've had enough, the mom of three said, laughing. Molly, have you thought about going on a week vacation?

Yeah, I don't want to just go on a week vacation. They all come down on me. The LA's finest star set of her children's many inquiries throughout the day. And then I start nagging. I'm nagging, and I'm that person, she joked, as she explained how her kids. and husband Cash Warren respond to her moods. They're like, Mom, your tone, you're so mean, Alba recalled. And Cash is like, gosh, I guess I'm going to go back in my man room.

I'm like, what else is new? Just disappearing for me to deal with everything. So yes, it's been fun. It's been really fun. How is Gideon in his man room? You know, when Gideon leaves after he's been like defending people that are wrongly put into jail and like all, you know, it's like, then he goes at his man room. Also, Molly, how long can you deal with it

before you finally just get your household staff to take over and you just say, I'm done. Answering your many questions, curious child of five years old. Or nine or whatever. Like, yeah, that's, that's a big,

that's a big fuck off, Jessica. Although I got your fucking bubble bath in my fucking bathroom and I'm going to throw it out the damn window when I get home. Momcation, just got a momcation tomorrow, Molly. I don't know. I didn't think of that earlier.

Have you thought about it, Molly? Have you thought about going on vacation? It's pretty funny. It's pretty funny when I say it to you. I get it, you know? This has been hard. And Molly and I have been, and Holden, we've all had the same quarantine experience.

This has been hard for us. We get upset sometimes. Oh, seriously. Like getting super baked until like three in the morning. Ugh. Why? I know, it's difficult. It really puts a kink in the next day.

You know, at least we're all keeping ourselves from, you know, jerking off during work meetings. Yes, please. That's our PSA for the episode. We got through at least one day of that. All right, I can see again. You can see again. Thank you guys.

This has been a delightful episode. Yeah, I'm going to play a manga. that I'm not going to get mad. You'll come see it. It'll be great. I'll never scream. I won't curse anybody out. You know what we need to do?

We need to get both the Zabrowski's. If you really want to see us at our best. I would watch that. It is going to be rough. I'm going to throw it out there. I haven't been banging your door down or Henry for that exact same. And I know it'll give me more viewers.

I know it'll give me more viewers. No, because you're not. You're like openly not. And I think that's why I'm pushing it because I kind of want to see how horrible it would be if we did it. And I think it's kind of fun. You know what? And what is life if we don't push ourselves out of our comfort zones? Have you thought about that, Holden?

Yeah, I've really thought about that a lot. Everybody right now really needs to be pushed outside of their comfort zones because right now everybody's just getting way too comfortable because there's just nothing insane and harrowing going on right now that would cause us all to be absolute bags of. of stress 24-7, just outside of our normal problems that we have. So I totally think I should be pushing more people out of their comfort zone. Thanks, Holden. And thank you guys. You know, we started this with so much anger today. And I guess we're ending it on a higher note with weird, you know, vitriol that I didn't

even know I had towards Jessica Alba. Yeah, I'm still angry. And it's in there. And sometimes, you know, You know, you don't, you can't find the truth until you sniff it out like a little piggy looking for truffles. There you go. This has been your episode of page seven.

And don't send any hate mail towards Jeffrey Katsenberg. Was that his name? Jeffrey? Or if you want to, I won't stop you. I think that you are a smart person. You can make your own decisions. I love you very much. And my name is Jackie Sbrowski.

You can follow me on Instagram at Jack That Worm. I also wanted this as a early announcement. November 5th, I'm going to keep pushing this to come join Holden and Natalie and myself November 5th at the last podcast network Twitch stream at 6 p.m. Pacific Standard Time, 9 p.m. Eastern Standard Time because we're watching the first twilight movie. First Twilight movie, November 5th. I love it. My name's Holden. Hi. You can find me on Twitch.tv.

forward slash hold nators ho every Friday night. I do a stream with Jackie. And you can also find me. No, that's it. Patreon.com forward slash page seven podcast. Page seven podcast at gmail.com. You guys are the best. Keep them coming.

Love all the kind words. And love even more the helpful suggestions for the celebrity conspiracy. Molly? My name is Molly. And I am MJK. Elkat on Instagram. Hell yeah, hit us up, page 7 podcast gbell.com. We love you. We'll talk to you next week. Bye, everybody.

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