Page 7 - Ep. 408: Is This the Year of the Furry?

Episode Date: June 24, 2021

This week we goss about the nightmarish Netflix dating series Sexy Beasts, Jackie realizes she's probably a furry (and a NERD GUUURL), Holden discusses his path from nice guy, to fuck boy, to family man, Carrie Fisher’s makeout parties, not to mention we learn that SUPERHOES DO DO THAT! And in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner; Is the band Ace of Base a bunch of Nazis?!Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7PodcastKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0 Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Uh-oh, it's getting hot outside, so what automatically gets caught in my head? Despacito. I want to respirate your queso, dehe that you digas to al-o-hid, for you to que don't you're gonna, if you're not with me. Despacito. I want to start your peasant at pesos, I'm in the parliaments of the labyrinth, and assente your body, all right? Manuscrito.

Sobe, Sube, Sube! I am going full Gangsters Paradise over here. That's a weird version of Gangsters Paradise. No, it's what I did with Gangsters Paradise, where I listened to it over and over and over again so I can

try and learn the words. Yes, I can look it up, but I feel like it goes, like itches, itches a scratch that I had from the days of yore, of listening to a song over and over again to try and learn it. But, um, turns out it makes you go mad when you listen to it over and over again.

And God, how often we did that. How many times did I would just go back on the cassette tape and play it again, which is what, again, I did with Gangsters Paradise, which is why I said a Gangster's Paradise did it. Very nice. I am impressed with your Espaniel. Thank you. Yeah.

I was as impressed with the sort of melody just sort of seemed to like puke all the Spanish words out in a kind of a way that sounds sort of like Despacito, but yeah, it works. It doesn't matter because the Spanish was there. Thank you. You're living Spanish, Despacito realness. Realness right now. We're watching to a drag race.

We are watching a lot of RuPaul's drag race right now. Yep, Lexi is thrilled. I'm so jealous of your guys' RuPaul's drag race experience because Holden, at least, you're experiencing it anew. It's your first time, right? Yeah, I always say it's that shableness. show that like, you know how you try to have like his, he's got away.

He try to have like the he show and the she show sometimes, right? Or the, like the he dogs and the she dogs. And the she dogs. Exactly like that. And I have my he dog shows, right? I watch my animas when the lady's not around and all that good stuff. And, you know, God, what was that terrible show on Hulu called like, everybody loves each other or whatever?

It might as well be called Live, Laf Love. God I hated that show. She loved that show. Now I'm so curious as to what show that was. I will watch that show. It's like everybody loves everyone. I forget what it is. I'll try to look it up.

I like that. I like what you're saying. No, it's a bunch of people crying and being, you know, I actually never mind. This is. Talk about it. Yes. I think it's Mrs.

It's us. They're always crying on that show. And I was so happy for her to enjoy this is us. And put the headphones on. Another one, because I just can't. handle that much sexual assault in a TV show, you know, handmaid's tail. That's Lexi's show. No, no, thank you. I can't do it. It hurts my chest. But Rupal's drag race, you know, really always became that show that I would be doing like, I'd be like playing video games

of the computer and slowly my head would turn to the TV and my chair would drift over to the couch. And, you know, it was always that show that I was like, I would actually probably just watch this, but it's her show, right? So in doing the research for this, man, I just fell in so hard. As you see, MJ, I constructed this bookshelf behind me for the nursery. You can see this studio, sadly, being ripped from me turning into a nursery. In one week, your little room went from being like, oh, this is just like my interim office into baby.

Yes. That is for a baby. You see all this, the dresser. Yeah, yeah. I can't wait to get hammered in that room with you later on this week. I know. Don't spill, like, right there. You see, he's got the diaper cage.

right here. But anyways, I put that fit bad boy together, just slamming through season six, I believe. I thought I was only gonna be able to get through season six in preparation for the show. I've now watched all of season six. Last night we finished All-Stars 2.

I may start a new one before Thursday. We'll see. I cannot get enough of it, and I just love it. It's so great because Lexi's like, yeah, you want to just watch drag race all night? Fuck yeah. Like my show.

I mean, come on, it'd be the best. It's like her coming in and be like, you know what show? I'm now just wanting to binge Hunter Hunter, the anime. I just started watching Cowboy Bebop so we can talk about this soon. You know, I am opening up my world. Sometimes you have to.

But I do think that it is the one for you, one for me. Yeah. It really has changed my life. Yes. Watching lots of things that I'm like, man, I never would have said yes to watching this. And I do like it. Also, Jackie, do you know what else the person who made Cowboy Bebop made?

A little anime called Carol and Tuesday. You're the loneliest girl. The loneliest girl. Yeah, it's the same person. So you'll see some of that DNA in there with the music. I think I randomly, whenever I get too stoned and I'm listening to The Loneliest Girl, I feel like I texted to you. And it is just this, it's a very sad song. The Loneliest Girl.

I love sad songs. It's so good. It's always crying. And it makes me sad. But you know what the opposite of that feeling is? And that is happily discussed. And yes, I'm referring to the feeling I had after watching the trailer for sexy beasts.

The new Netflix show. The new Netflix show. This show is made for us to talk about. It's made for us. It's made for us. It's made for us. I don't know. I have my, I have feelings about this show.

I just hope it's not like, I told you y'all before this. It's not like, I felt like foxy dancing kind of felt like it's just, okay, it is mad. It is literally like friezer. Isn't it called foxy dancing? It's called like singles alone and they dance for love. Yeah, that's like that.

It was something like that. I was talking about. It was the show where the two people wouldn't meet until they dance together for the first time. And they danced together and they learned. They did a choreograph dance. You don't understand Holden. You're saying this like it's a bad thing. I loved that damn show.

And you said like, oh, you watched the one. Yeah. I loved it. But after two episodes, I was like, I get what this is and I'm good. Like, I don't need to watch any more. And they're flirty dancing. Flirty dancing. Flirty dancing.

Yeah. So I love a show where you're just like, this is the description. And you know what? Sexie beasts? They flirty dance. Oh my God. Okay. Flirty dancing, sure.

Is sexy beast like flirty dancing? Maybe. But what else is it like? Mr. Personality, 2003. Yes, it's more like that. M.J. I'm sorry. Finally.

For anybody who maybe missed that episode or several episodes in which you forced us to endure. We've screened about for years. I'm obsessed with it. I feel like I'm the only person who talks about Mr. Personality. And everyone's on Twitter talking about sexy beasts. Wow, what a premise.

I'm sorry, this premise has been done. Has it been done with the funny, creepy animal faces? No, but it has been done. Oh, what if you have to date somebody and you can't see their face? Mr. Personality. What if they look like Stonehenge instead of like, you know, animals? That's the premise of Mr. Personality. Again, hosted by Monica Lewinsky, never forget.

Never, never. Never. That's page seven's never forget. And what's insane about Mr. Personality, why I will say, and I'll die on this hill, it's better than sexy beasts. Because at the end of the day, sexy beasts is filled with hot people. It is not that when they take off the masks, everyone goes, oh my God, what happened to them? Like, I feel like I hear the Wilhelms help scream when they take it off. No, they're very, very hot people.

They're all attractive. You just don't know what kind of hot they are. Right, whereas Mr. Personality, they all had to be like schlubs. You gotta be a little shulbs. Oh, really? They were like normal. They were just like not reality show hot, you know? Yeah.

But also, I don't know, maybe this is especially shallow, but I feel like with Mr. Personality and sexy beasts both, it's like, okay, you're like in person with them. You see their whole gist. Yeah. You see like there's, I feel like you can get, obviously somebody's. face matters, but you can get a lot by like going on a date with somebody being, seeing, touching their body. Like, you can feel chemistry.

Like, it actually isn't as novel as, you know, for example, the circle or whatever. When you actually have no idea who you're talking to, like talking to somebody with an animal mask on, it's pretty close to talk with somebody without an animal mascot. Oh my God. Also right now, and if you have a chance and if you're by a computer, look up flirty dancing. and there is this one, Ryan and Gary, G-A-R-R-R-Y, and you see them see, see this is what I'm fucking talking about. Now, this is reality, television.

You watch them see each other for the first time and both of their faces light up and then they do a dance through a terrarium of sorts. This is what I want to see. It's just, it's a, I'm just saying and why I connected it to this, it seems like it might be a bit of a, it's like a fun thing to see a trailer of

and talk about on page, but I wonder that the premises might be a slightly flimsy after a couple episodes. You might be kind of like that's why what's so great about, what's so great about Meredith Forsyte, what's so great about 90 day, and even like a love is blind and even kind of a too-a-d-handle, they go through phases, right? Yes. Like you go through all these different phases in the show and it takes you through a whole season. I think these will be more like episode for episode like, will they want to, who are they going to

shoes at the end, right? Although it is kind of fun to watch them in the beautiful, and I will say whoever's doing the design of these, they are very weird and very creepy, and it is kind of fun to watch them kiss. Yeah, with these faces on. Agreed.

And I'm going to watch a fantastic. Yeah, the premise is solid premise. Let's see what the execution is. And I'll tell you what, the execution of those masks and the stage makeup, killer. Whoever did that, it's like unbelievable makeup. And it is really funny because like there's definitely one that's like dressed like the scarecrow from the wizard

body. Very upsetting it. Yeah. Like it's great to see these people having like the stupid high stakes reality show conversations of like, well, how am I going to know? Like, but you're just dressed like the scarecrow. It's like absolutely fantastic. And that, Nat is what brings us back to Drag Race.

One of my favorite things about Drag Race is people dress incredibly ridiculously having very serious conversations. Yes, that's the best thing about, you know, who's going to get eliminated. Yeah, yeah. It's the funniest. They're just so insane looking, especially they do like a horror thing or something. You're just like half your face is like bloody

and you're like seriously trying to. I'm just watching the reunion episode for All Stars 2. And yeah, like Katia's just whole half of his face is just like shredded. And yet he has to have these like serious lookbacks on the season. It's so funny. It also just taps in slightly to Jackie's like wolf sexy thing. Who's your sexy wolf? It's like a little.

slightly furry. Absolutely, B stars. B stars, which is kind of of season two coming around the bin for that. I mean, is this actually, you know, is this the year of the furry? Is that where we're at right now? I don't feel it in my everyday life,

but in my anime life, I think I have it. Yeah. I love that you tried to get your own niece to watch that show and she was like, ew. Yeah. She was like, it's a little weird, Ann Jackie. I was like, yeah, but sexual tension. I don't understand. You don't want to watch that?

You alienated her your super, like, nerdy anime fan niece. She watches all those, you know, the My Hero Academia. She watches the one with the, I don't know, there's a strawberry person in it. I try to watch them, and then I tried to share. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm trying to share and connect. And B-Stars is too weird for a 15-year-old. Fine.

But July 15th, though, season two, B-Stars. I'm very excited about it. Also, today starts too hot to handle. It's today? We were talking about this on talking TV. Fuck yes. We're back, guys. Really?

Real summer for introverts. I'm looking at. And by that, I mean, all of the reality television we can watch. Oh my God, I didn't know. Dude, I really hope they, I believe in this show. I love this show. I don't want to, I feel like I was already too negative about the other show. So I'm going to be positive.

I really hope they move forward with, with, I hope they heard. my critiques. I guess I'll just say this. I want the, I hope the wristwatches come back, and I want them to make people need to make out with each other that wouldn't normally make out with each other because they're so frustrated and they get the green light for no reason. They're so hot, and they can't chaos. That's what it is. Come on to Ottena, handle, bring me more chaos, bro. More chaos. Oh my God. I'm already seeing some trailer footage here. I just see the headline. Netflix to Outta Handel remains TV. the movie's horniest and most confounding reality show.

What does it mean? I'm so excited. I love it. This is great news because we just finished the Circle season one and we're watching Pose, which is an awesome, great, like actually good high quality show postseason three. But I don't know what's up next and I was going to come to you guys and ask what I should watch next. And Gidea does not really like reality shows, but once we get into it, he usually will find

himself loving it. I'll also say, MJ, I think you might really be interested. I haven't seen it yet, so I can't vouch for it. But there's a whole season of Netflix docu miniseries on called This Is Pop. And it's just takes, yeah. And like the first one's like all about how Boys Demin affected pop music. There's an episode on Auto Tune. Really?

There's an episode on country going pop with like Lil Nas X and everything. I'm like, just based on what I'm seeing, I'm like, I'm already in. I really can't wait to watch this. I'm also trying to find, Holden told me about. this great reality show that's coming out over on Talking TV, which you should totally check out because Holden and I scream at each other about television. F. Boy Island. I'm so excited for the next year.

I forgot where you were. It's called F. Boy. Hosted by Nikki Glazer. Really? Yeah. Hey. Yeah. It's hosted by Nikki Glazer.

It's going to be on HBO Max this summer. And literally the premises, they got a group of self-proclaimed nice guys and a group of self-proclaimed fuck boys. and the contestant, the lady, doesn't know which one is which, and they choose between the guys, and then it's revealed to them whether or not, whether they are a nice guy or a fuckboy at the end. Oh my God, this is such a good idea.

Okay, but this is a problem. Now I'm totally going to be clubbing the one for you, one for me, TV rule because we are watching Loki, which is for him, but I'm just going to be like, okay, sorry, the circle. Also, sorry to out the handle season two. Also, sorry, fuck boy island. Like, it's just going to be my turn, my turn.

Yeah, yeah. Well, you just tell them be like, Loki, more like Slokie. Can we watch this fucking show about people try to get their nut off? Yeah, man. Come on. I want to know. And man, I mean, what even is, what do you? I, at one point I thought of myself to be a nice guy.

And I would definitely say I'm closer to F-boy territory at this point. Are you a fuck-boy? You have transitions from nice guy to fuck-boy. I was a self-reclaimed nice guy in high school. I very quickly, as soon as I got at all popular in college, sophomore year, immediately became a fuck boy. I think that's a very popular nice guy path.

Nice guys get their confidence in college or whatever, adulthood, and then they become fuckboys. And then fuckboy kind of through the 20s a little bit there, except for one long-term relationship. And then, you know, now I'm here, family man. Is that always the trajectory? Family boy. just like Nick Cage.

Yep. From nice guy to fuck boy to family man. It's the natural progression of most dudes. Wow. He's really open. I can't wait to see what I can't wait. I hope that F. Boy Island is everything. I hope it's so good.

As bad as I need it to be. At least it's like HBO. So hopefully they'll just be so trashy with it. I really like Nikki Glazer a lot. I love the stuff she does. I love her on podcasts and stuff. And she's like so. And she's, like, so into this kind of reality show, too,

so it's a really good fit. Yeah. Yeah, I'm excited. I'm excited about lots of things right now, including this picture that we must talk about. I love you both. And I don't think either one of you want to talk about this, but we're going to talk about it.

Because we have to talk about night crawler, eaten out storms, pussy. If we don't, I will, I will explode. I'll bet Holden wants to talk about it. I thought it was going to be, like, more insinuated. It is very graphic. It's just immediately you see Storm's tits and Nightcrawler's penis is a dangling dongle there

in the second picture as he's just slamming away in her vagina with his mouth. And yeah. So last week, remember what we talked about? And I know that the internet was aflame with the fact that Batman wouldn't eat, they took out a scene from the Harley Quinn show because Batman was going to eat out catwoman. And the response from that was white. Why did you take it out?

Because superheroes don't do that, was the quote. And so this is just so delightful that the son of comic book legend Dave Cockram. Now, Dave Cockram created both Nightcrawler and Storm. Long story short, Storm is my favorite, mostly because I'm obsessed with weather and because she is an African goddess who can control the weather. And I think that's fucking sick as shit. And Nightcrawler I was always sexually attracted to, but more because of Alan coming in the movie. And that was a little, welcome, bintab, your welcome.

That was way more from, you know, musical days. And thinking about, so essentially, Dave Cockram drew this scene between the characters, who I'm assuming have a relationship at some point. Obviously, I don't know that much. I just had lots of posters of Storm in my room because I wanted it. And I would like put on long white wigs pretending to be her. And so Dave Cockram had it in a sketchbook that his son found. So his son came out Ivan Cockram and posted them on Twitter of actual sketches from the person that created the characters of Nightcrawler.

Man, go into town on Storms. I'm going to assume perfect, puss. And I want to watch that tape so weirdly and so bad. This is the original I'd watch that tape, but it's a drawing from decades ago. Here's the other thing. Could you imagine finding your dad's picture of this sort of thing? You think it's wonderful? I don't know.

Oh, I think it's sick. I think it's mortified. I think the tweet is so cute. And he tweeted he said, never did I imagine there being a right time to share this. But if there ever was, this is it. I love that. These are from the final sketchbook of my dad, Dave Cockrum, creator of Nightcrawler and Storm. If anyone was wondering, does Nightcrawler eat pussy?

The answer is yes. Hashtag Batman goes down. And then he tweeted the pictures. And right, I mean, of course, it's your dad, so it would be weird. But I guess if your dad is like a comic book legend and you found this, you would just be like, holy shit. You know. And then you'd be like, should I share this? Should I not?

And then there's a whole week of people talking about comic book superheroes eating pussy. And you're like, well, I have to share this, you know? I think it's so funny. How do you not share it? It's just such amazing, pertly, it's just, you know, it's one of those times. You're like, man, I imagine. I just feel like it's like a bless up. Thanks, Dad.

Thanks for giving me one of the, like, that is so fun. What a fun way to enter the conversation. And again, my God, I would watch the tape. I would. I know that it's cartoons, but you know how I feel about B-Stars. I don't know what this is called. I don't know what label I need to put on myself. But I guess I'm into what.

just like Holden reading your mongas. You're a furry, I think. Am I a furry? Have you ever tried dressing up and, you know, getting into it that way? I don't think you're a furry if you want to watch hot superhero bone. I think that most people want to watch hot superheroes.

Also, that wolf is really sexy and you know it. The B-Stars thing might make you a furry. Holden's right about that. Because it's like Twilight as well. I don't know what we're dealing in here. You're like into fantastical sex. I never knew. You know what?

It's got a nice. to grow and change. Also, join us every Tuesday night to talk about sex. Over on my Twitch channel, oh, no, it's Jackie, where we talk about the, then we'll get into it. Maybe I need to start bringing this in

because we need to talk about these things. I don't necessarily need a label. But you know what, who knew? Yeah. I had no idea. It lives in here. It's a human-shaped person who may or may not be an animal

or a mythical being, having human-like sex. Like an anthropomorphic, You know, I guess wolves are my thing. I had no idea. Well, now I hate Jacob. You don't understand us, Holden. I hate him.

I hate Jacob. Yeah, but you can only hate something you once loved. Oh, my God. So it doesn't matter. I was in love with the werewolf for so long, and now I hate him. But that's fine. Now you crawl around in the night. Man, poor Jeff.

Jeff just listens. He's so patient. He's a very good. person. And I can't be silenced. I won't be censored. If he put like some ears on or something, I mean, would that be fun? If he like put some claw hands on, hairy claw hands?

Honestly, I think it's because I'm watching Sweet Tooth right now. I don't think I can handle it. That's the opposite. Sweet Tooth is what you're, I was trying to tell Gideon about how you're watching, you know, nerd girl shows. And he was like, well, just because you watch comic. shows doesn't make you a nerd girl. I was like, no, but Jackie doesn't just watch the show.

She then says, nerd girl, every time she watches that. Yeah, that's more of the nerd girl thing. But, you know. And it seeps into her real life. That's the true nerd situation, right? It seeps in somehow. It starts to take over.

You know what I mean? No, I'm just, I'm for show. I'm so cool. You can be a cool nerd girl. I'm learning these things. I just really, it's never that I was against, being a nerd girl. But I think that it was always

a kind of thing that, when I'm like, oh, I guess I'm a little nerdy. And people are like, but you're not, you're not nerdy enough. Yeah. And I think that's why I call nerd girl

because it's like, you're right. I don't know anything about any of it. I am barely, like, I'm dipping my, the tips of my toes into it. Yeah, nothing like made me, I always talk about,

nothing made me more mad than like the, the, like, came, had a great life so far, perfect. I'm sure they're not actually perfect behind the scenes. I'm sure there's a lot of stuff

going on, but seemingly perfect, hot girl being like, I'm such a dark because they like, like South Park. You know what I mean? Or something. You're just like, that is so. And I was like, I got beat up for like in the stuff. Like, you know what I mean?

Like you're, I don't know. It's fine. Embodied by Miranda in the circle season one when she meets Joey and she's like, no, no, no. Everyone just thinks I'm so hot, but I'm actually like so clumsy. And obviously Miranda also has a lot of trauma that she needs to work through. And like, I think Miranda had a very hard life. But there is definitely that. thing where it's like, no, no, no, I'm such a nerd.

I'm such a dork because I trip sometimes. And it's like a way to disarm yourself as a hot. It's a hack. Yes, it is the J-law effect. You're right. I'm like, I had to hide what my true passions from the world out of pure fear that they would attack me for it. Yeah, beat the shit out of you for it.

Did you have to do that? Oh, no, you always got asked to the dance every time one came around. No, no, no, never asked me to the dance. I had to do all the asking. Oh, oh, don't even, don't even get me started. And then they left me on the dance. dance floor and they kissed someone else in the bathroom. Maybe this will hit home for some listeners out there.

Hopefully, hopefully more than most. That look of disappointment when I would ask a girl to a dance and then realizing that they, A, were kind of obligated to say yes because it would be rude, even though the first girl I asked to the very first homecoming dance and freshman year said no. Damn, go for her. Yeah. And then later in the day, it came back and said yes and I should have actually been like,

fuck that. No, I've moved on. But I did take her. but I did take her the dance. That look, I just bottle it up. Ooh, the pain. And you saw it because they were like, fuck, because you knew they wanted one of five other people

to ask them probably first. Literally anyone else but you. The crestfallen look, especially like senior prom even, the crestfallen look of the girl I asked to the dance, I'll always remember. Are you thinking about it? Can you see your face right now? Yes.

They were like, and it's just like, yeah, okay. because they couldn't say no, because if they said no, it'd get around and, you know what I mean? That was the thing about freshman here too. I was the one who was like, all right, I'm gonna like man up here

and be the first of my friends, the first of like most people in the school to ask someone to the dance. I'm gonna like show everybody it's not that scary and just like get it done and be done with it and not have to think about it anymore.

And then I got a no. So I agree that you are the primary victim here, but I also think there's an interesting instructive thing going on here around how girls are socialized to be like, I have to say yes, even though I don't like the point. That's a really good point.

Well, it wasn't even like, but it was more like, I really wished, like, I really wanted like Ryan to ask me. Yeah. But this fucking goob is that. It's not like they were afraid, you know, it's not like they were afraid that you're afraid of me, but said yes, they were more like, ugh. But I do think that you're kind of, I think girls are kind of socialized to be like, I have to be nice.

Yeah. And I can't just, I, and you're certainly not socialized to go ask Ryan yourself. So you just kind of have to wait, you know, and so that it's. I think it's also that, and the reason for the no and the look of disappointment, they're also because of all those movies that came out back then and whatever comes out now. They're socialized to think that like a homecoming dance freshman year means anything and that you go with matters at all. Yeah. And because of Dawson's Creek. I solely blame Dawson's Creek because of it.

Please. I'm sure. I never watched that show, but they all did. I know that. The sad women I asked to the dance. I mean, but on the other hand, as someone that was asking, um, that was asking people to dances, the look on their face of shock of a woman at that time

asking them to do it and just the look of also that kind of disgust as well, which man, that shame. Even worse though. And I was just so good, though, even then of being like, like pretending like it didn't matter. And I can't do that now. And that is one thing that has changed. At the time, I'm like, all good.

I'm fine with it. And then, like, would run away and then go smoke. cigarettes and cry. Well, don't worry. It came back around to us during the Sadie Hawkins, right? Because I did not get, I believe, an ask

for that one either. It's ridiculous that they set up a whole dance of like, this dance is like a dance, but backwards and weird. Because a girl has to ask a boy. The cucka-cuh-cuh-cuck-a-poh. Are you going to be in your cuck-cackey pants?

I love for those engagement videos that are like a queer couple and they both unknowingly planned to propose to each other the same event on the same day and you just see it go down and it's so perfect and you're just like, oh man, this is great.

You know what I mean? Yeah. Share it. Share the love. But also why I don't live for the moments for the guy like cornered the girl. This is like me,

ask the girl to dance right? At the like basketball game. Those are my favorite. In the middle of everybody and then she like runs away. And then she has to run the entire length of the basketball court away. And I'm sorry, but he did.

If you do that, then you deserve to have to watch her. Yeah. I'm just screaming the inside time I'm like, no. Like, just how can you not? You know what, MJ? I think I agree with you so hard on that.

I used to have the policy of like, why not just say yes in the moment to like avoid the embarrassment and then afterwards be like, fuck no, you cornered me in front of everybody. I'm not marrying you. That was just for show. But at the same time, the guy does need to learn, huh? And I say this as somebody who I publicly proposed. Like they are, don't publicly propose. I did it because we already knew we were.

were going to get married. And so I just did it because it felt. You did such a great job, though. I think publicly proposing is not horrible if you plan it and the other person is very well aware. And you know that they're going to say yes as well. If you know the other person is going to say yes and you know that they aren't humiliated by being in public, then I think it's fine. But if you don't know that, you're taking a big old gamble to do in the middle of the

basketball court. That's a long court. I mean, it should never happen. And honestly, it's so manipulative, right? Yeah. It's like, well, I know deep down she doesn't want to marry me. and that I'm like kind of cornering her on this. So I'm just gonna like force it in this shitty way.

It's so manipulative and terrible. But it still fucking kills me to watch. Oh, where the guys is abusive guy. Too, it's so demeaning because the guy's down on his knee. You know what I mean? He's like, it's already like set up to just be so embarrassing. Like there's no, because then you have to slowly stand up. Oh, brutal.

You know what's also set up to be embarrassing and weird? maybe it's Hollywood's makeout parties thrown by Carrie Fisher. I feel like this actually does come in at a really great time of thinking about the fact that apparently Carrie Fisher used to throw makeout parties and invite other celebrities and you would pick and now everyone seems consenting.

You pick their names out, you pick a name out of a hat and you go make out with somebody. But at this party that I'm referring to, Sarah Paulson's there, Matthew Perry's, there, but also Shirley MacLean and Queen Latifah are there. I want to see the guest list of these makeout parties that Carrie Fisher used to throw because apparently Matthew Perry rejected Sarah Paulson at one of the makeout parties. This is such a tough story because I want to root for everything Carrie Fisher does, but I think that this is just so weird. I mean, I'm definitely

weirdly into a makeup. I mean, I'm down with it for a makeup part. Because everybody's consenting. This is like the least of the egregious stuff that Carrie Fischer did, like the throes of her addiction. You know what I mean? She definitely was a wild, wild child. This seems so, I think what's grosser about this is it seems like something that would happen again going back to high school. It feels like something that would happen in high school, maybe college. And so therefore, that's the weird part of it. Like you're all grown adults in this space. People in their 30s aren't meant to like, be like, oh, I guess I'm

I'm going to kiss you now. If you like doing that, that's great. I just feel like people in their 30s are just too tired. That's a fuck party, guys. You need to have a full on straight up. Everyone is oiled up, and we are straight up doing DPs. Right. And we're doing, you know, spreading STDs.

That's 30s. That's your 30s. It just made me think of when I was invited to a lingerie party, when my senior year, and I, like now, always been a big girl, and I never wanted to do something like that. And I was scared. And I was like, you know what I'm going to do it?

And I went out and I got like a lingerie thing that like kind of at me. And you had a JC Penny. And I showed up in a jacket even though it's Florida. And it was hot. And they had decided not to have a lingerie party. No. And I was there covered in a jacket with lingerie underneath. And no one had lingerie on.

Oh, my God. And I wanted to be dead. I was ready to be dead. And people kept being like, why do you have a coat on? I'm like, oh, I'm just cold. It's Florida, bitch. That's your origin story if you become a supervillain.

I'm having so many flashbacks you're giving me. Remember every single time it was like pajama day at school and you're on the way there. And like the first kid you see is just wearing normal clothes and you're in your pajamas. It always happens, right? You never see another kid in pajamas. The first kid you see every time you get to campus, they weren't wearing pajamas. You're like, did I get the wrong day? Am I literally about to have the most humiliating day of high school I've ever experienced in my life?

And then you see, like, one kid in pajamas. Like, oh, thank God. Thank God. There's one person wearing pajamas. You're, like, dressed like a pirate. You know what I mean? It's like, and you're just like, please tell me that booty day was not, you know, Thursday instead of Wednesday. I love booty day, but everyone just, like, pads their ass.

Yeah. Show up in a full pirate regalia. Oh, I'm Captain ass. Like, that's not even inventive. Yeah. It's just, must have been terrifying for you. I mean, and yeah, all those, anytime you had the theme party, it's always so funny though when you see somebody show up to a theme party,

but no one bothered or no, you know what I mean? Yes, and especially thinking of Sarah Paulson, who was just so beautiful. And going up to Matthew Barry, Matthew Barry literally said, I got you and like held up the paper. And she said, all right, let's kiss. And he was like, no, and walked away. And he left the room.

And just left. And I just think. It's very, she says, we knew each other a little bit through one of my very best friends in the world, so it was kind of awkward. So fair, but it is just to like, at least talk about it, like, maybe we probably shouldn't. Right. I don't know. I think I would just, like, spew at someone for 15 minutes of, like, about how I feel about it before I said no. And maybe that's a boundaries issue.

Who knows? But. It's just also Matthew Perry. So God knows what he was going through at this point in his life. I mean, Carrie Fisher and Matthew Perry. I mean, these are the poster children for just horrific addictions and things. And he also might have just been like, forgot, you know,

he was even just at in a space and time. You know what I mean? It also definitely could be. He might have thought he was a paradox at that point. Paradoxes don't make out at make out parties. So covered in, yeah, it's so doced up. But they definitely have their orgies in larger, more open, and well-ventilated spaces,

which is what the new. York Health Department is trying to tell everyone to do for our, these streets will run white with come summer. I think it's so funny. I appreciate the fact that the New York Department of Health is talking about sex practices and how to be a little bit safer after a pandemic. Yeah, they put out real weird stuff during the pandemic. I never thought I'd hear the New York Department of Health mentioning rimming, for instance.

Yeah. Talked about rimming before. They were like, eating ass is good because you're not like. putting your faces next to each other. Like in the deep depths of the horrible pandemic, they were like, if you're gonna fuck, RIM. Like, they're really pro, they bring it up a lot. I just love their, their ideas of what they said.

It's because I read this New York Post article, and I just thought it was funny. Again, I appreciate the fact that they're trying to have a conversation about it, but it's like, enjoy sex virtually, such as video dates, sexting, sexy Zoom parties or chat rooms. And you know what, I know that I know a few people that are doing the, like, jerking off over Zoom.

I think that that is great. If that is what you are into. But at this point, does anyone even want to have a sexy Zoom party? But I do like that they at least said, well, if you're going to have an orgy, just do it in a more well-ventilated space. I also like, wear a face covering or mask, even during sex. Maybe it's your thing. Maybe it's not. But wearing a face covering over your nose and mouth adds a layer of protection.

That's not, I guess, I mean, yeah, if you're going to do like an eyes wide shot, yeah, have that. But that's the opposite. I mean, sexy beasts. And I was already telling you, Jackie, you got to, if you want to practice good protocol, you got to get that wolf mask on Jeff. The only problem is how much I huff and I puff, right, when I'm getting it. Right.

But then you think, like, have you burped in your mask yet? Oh, of course. Like, I've burped in my mask in a horrible, like, after eating, like, a bunch of popcorn. And you're just like, why have I? Or hung over after eating Indian food. Why have I done it? I don't want to smell that. The next day after drinking two bottles of red wine

and you're like walk into somewhere you don't want to be walking to and you just burp that. Oh, God. Especially back into summer, the summer of sex that we're having this year. And yet still, with the masks, I don't feel sexy with them on.

And I don't feel sexy with them sweat, stuck to my face. Oh, and then also make it kinky, be creative with sexual positions and physical barriers like walls, i.e. do a glorial. Put a glorial in your own house. Get out you. Get out the jigsaw. It's fine. It's sexier this way. Exactly. I'm so scared of the hole of being hurt through the hole, I think. I've never, that's why I've never been that into Gloria. Like I always my head goes to the worst possible, you know, outcome. Oh, you think someone's going to bite it off? Or anything. Or you're thinking like the hole's not sanded well enough? You wanted to be a real smooth? To do. Yeah, I want them to put some kind of rubber in the inside of it or whatever. But that's the whole point of it is like,

then you're doing what I was complaining about with opening presents with my family on Christmas. Then you're getting too, like, clinical about it and too boring about it. You know what I mean? If you have all this setup and everything, it's just like not even good at that point. And then it's like the whole point of glory holes

it's rough and ready and just kind of a nightmare. You know what I mean? And you just happen upon stick as well. Are you supposed to happen a Ponstit? It's just rando and the whole thing. The whole point is it's rando, right? But again, you put a wall in your house. You know who's S and that D.

It's your own W. Yeah, it's your own W. It's your own win. W stands for W. Because that is your championship prize. If you are a fuckboy for long enough, eventually you get gifted the prize of a human being to own. Just like in Extreme Sisters,

which I know that we don't have a whole lot of time to talk about Extreme Sisters. but I'm just so happy that if you watch the trailer for extremes is holding. So gross. It's so good. You're gross. It just should be called Jackie's gross.

Because it's all about how you want to like suck wolf people's dicks. Like night crawlers, cock, cock is coming all over. Storm's plusina. You love it. And then we're talking about it. Now we've got the glory holes. Crazy are for glory holes. But holden they never do anything with each other.

Yes, extreme sisters. It's true. And now hopefully. MJ that I've gotten you to cross over to the dark side because Holden won't watch it. And I'm talking about extreme sisters over on TLC, which I watch on my, oh, the evilest of all the apps Discovery Plus, where it is sisters that are extreme, i.e. I. Including Anna and Lucy, who are, oh, I believe they're Ozzy. Very Aussie.

And they share one man and they're going to share a baby. So essentially, then they're both be the moms. It's like having a sister wife. Actually, it is literally having a sister wife. They go to the bathroom together. One watches the other shit. That's so gross.

And I was just thinking they were like, if one goes to the bathroom, the other one hangs out in the bathroom. It's like, what about when they're like blasting diarrhea sloppers? I don't want anybody sitting there talking me. I don't care if they look just like me. Do you think that's grosser, Holden, than having sex? Weirdly, yes.

Weirdly, yes. I don't, I think being in the room with a super. sibling while they're taking a dump. It's not ideal, but it's whatever. Being in the same room with them when they're... Hey, Jay, think about staring at your brother and being like, yeah, is it a big sloppor today? He's like, oh my God, I'm so hungover.

Ugh, oh, just shitting his ass. I'm not saying I'm going to do it, but I am saying that these sisters, in the interview, describe how if they're one man does something to one of them in the bedroom, he has to do something to the other one. He always does the same thing to both of them. But then at the end they go, no, but we never touch each other, like, all. And it's just like, what is how, I'm sorry, I try not to kink shame, but I do think siblings should not be in the same room having sex together. I love when we try to be PC about stories like this.

It's so absurd. It's this guy. I'm going to say it. It's gross. It's gross to have your sibling in the bed with you, yes. I don't say, I will, I will. Having a sexual experience together. Yes, I wish I will shame that.

I think that's okay. I don't care if you're not touching each other. You are having a sexual experience together. That's gross. Gross. Yeah. And I think if there's also, it's just like a weird, I'm not a doctor, but it comes off very like OCD to me. Like, it's very like, if I flip the switch, I have to flip it back.

Like, it's like if one does this, the other does this and stuff. And it gets really. or else something bad will happen. And it is, I'm sure, it's got to be something. It's got to be, right? Because there's so much of that kind of, it seems like there's a lot of, like, magical thinking happening with the way

that they interact with each other in the world where, like, it all, it has to be the same. If it's not the same, then something's off and everything's fucked up, right? It feels like very kind of OCD-ish to me. And then also the part, the creepiest is, if Lucy ought to buy-bye, Lucy is the mother. If you are to baby, you're the mother.

but then Anna says, Anna disagrees, it says, well, both it's my eyes. And so it's all this talk about how like, that's weird to, that's big red flag for all loose, loose there coming from Anna. The man is like, where they say they feel like one person. So I guess they all, I try to take them like one person. I mean, you know, he's fucking thrilled.

He gets too, you know, and they're pretty. I mean, for sure. They're like Instagram, reaction. pretty, but they're pretty. I do enjoy, though, a lot of the other siblings, like, a lot of times the partner, like, it's just so weird where one of them is married,

in one of the other sister pairings. She's married, and her sister isn't, but her sister lives with them, and she constantly, like, gets into the bed and, like, her husband will wake up in the morning, and her sister is also in the bed with them, and he's like, can you not? I'd really like it if you weren't.

in my bed when I wake up in the morning. And they're like, but we sleep next to each other. It's like, I just, I mean, I love Henry. You imagine Jeff's face of Henry just went, hello. I imagine he's wearing a top hat. Yeah, he's dressed like Mr. Peanut. And he was like, Henry, get out of here. Do you all have that in general, like,

I feel like Lex is way more down to, like, share a bed with friends or whatever for like someone's in town or whatever, or her sister even. Like, if they're crashing. If she's in town crashing, they'll just, like, share the bed. And I'm like, that's so foreign to me. I see by the floor. I am such a separate. Even with your sister?

No, we don't even, my, we grew up in a family where it's very private. Yeah. We're very clothed. Same. We don't talk about any of these things. And also, your bed is your space. Yeah. And no one else.

So, but it's hard, though, because, like, growing up, like, when we lived in dorms, like, when I lived in a dorm in college, you had to get over it because it was like, literally people need to sleep on your bed. There's nowhere else or, like, lay on your bed. there's nowhere else. So that kind of broke it. Even now, I'm like, if I ain't sched up and you, I don't really want you in my bed.

Yeah, yeah, totally. I also don't like, I feel like I got to college and I opened my mind and I was like, ooh, you can just share a bed with a friend, but it still feels very intimate. And I like will suggest like, should we sleep head to toe? Like a fucking prude, but I'm just like, it feel, especially if it's like, yeah,

it's, it's, and I think that maybe like sisters have something special. where they're, I feel like a lot of sisters just like pile into bed together and I think that's cute. And I kind of hope that my two kids have that. Yeah, there's something sweet about it. A more physical relationship with each other. Yeah, yeah. There's something that speaks towards like the opposite of my family that feels very closed off intimacy-wise.

Yes, right. So I admire it in a certain ways. But I'm also like, I am also like, oh, are people coming in to stay in our apartment? Like, I may get a hotel. Like, no joke. Like, I just need my space at this point. Like, Lexi can be all up in it all the time, but that's the one person who's got the golden ticket to always be up in it.

My Besty and I will do it every once in a while. Yeah, that makes sense. But even we will put, like, pillows in between us. Like, it still is, because it's like, we'll do it if we're hammered. Like, Madeline and I would do it if we're hammered, but we will always have pillows. But it's mostly just because, like, man, I'm a gripist. You get close to me, I'm going to be on you. I'm wrapped around.

Yeah, that's what I'm afraid I'm going to cuddle you. Like, a couple of years ago, I shared a bed with a guy friend because we were all like, there was like eight of us sleeping in a basement on a trip. And I was like, yeah, whatever, let's share bed. But I was like, let's do head to toe because, and it wasn't because I was like, oh, we can't sleep vertically next to each other. But I was like, I'm going to roll over and forget that you're not giddy in and, like, spoon. And grab on you.

That is really what the issue is because I'm a grabber. Well, I got to say, I didn't even realize we really need to get to the celebrity conspiracy. Yes. Give me the share. Do you believe it? Is the band Ace of Bass a bunch of Nazis? Oh, no. Are they?

No, not at all. This is very, I'm going to go in previses. This is very KKK princess, okay? So just follow along with me, all right? It's a little more extreme than that, but it's actually maybe a positive thing. This one comes in from Victoria, by the way, who says, hello, Holden.

So for background, I work on a food truck, and I'm 24. My boss is 35, so he knows a little more. about 90s culture and music than I do. The other day I was listening to a last podcast episode on the truck, and they mentioned something about Ace of Base. My boss, out of nowhere, says the founder was a Nazi, and the song I saw the sign was about him leaving the Nazis.

But they're probably all Nazis. And I was like, what? What a celebrity conspiracy handed right to me? In the most recent episode, you said you were getting low on conspiracy, so I figured the timing couldn't be better. Oh my God, you made my Monday so much easier because you sent this on. I hope it makes it in. It did.

So this is from the blog post that she linked That had the most concise explanation The sign is one of those 90s pop songs That seems simple enough. A girl sings that she saw this quote Saw the sign and open up her eyes And she leaves the person I saw the sign and she leave

You want it? Is that what you want it? I love it. Well actually that is good Because maybe some of our younger listeners I would hate to say this But might not know that song So it's good that you guys saying a little bit of it.

And she leaves the person who is suggested to be a bad influence on the main character. It's assumed to be a song about relationship red flags, but is it? Apparently, Aza-based member, Ulf Eckberg, in his youth, was a sympathizer of anti-immigration groups and even did for a little while. Apparently, allegedly, I should say, I guess. I don't want to implicate anybody here because it could be way wrong. This is some Randos blog, bro. All right? None of this could be real at all.

Apparently, though, he even played in a neo-Nazi band for a little while. and later publicly stated that he regrets this time in his life, that he, you know, he reformed, he changed. I mean, I think that's okay. Actually, that is why the sign is hypothesized to be about leaving the Nazi life behind. Here's some lyrical examples. I got a new life. You would hardly recognize me.

I'm so glad. Okay, there's one. Here's another one. Is enough enough? Fool, that's from the song. Fool is full. Is actually often a term used by anti-immigration groups to imply the country is full.

Is enough enough could be a play on words by throwing the racist words back at the racist. Here we go. Life is demanding without understanding. Instead of understanding for the main character, this could be understanding for immigrants, other people, that it's too demanding to hate on people all the time.

That's my favorite lyrical citation. I love it. It's like the most famous line from the song. Be like, what if it's about racism? This is the conspiracy theory version of what I was talking about. how I love when really, really ridiculous, like, lead-dressed people are taking something really seriously.

This is like that version of that, like the music version. No one's going to drag you up to get into the light where you belong, but where do you belong? This is aimed at you, not I. No one is going to put you in the spotlight where you think you belong. But does this other person belong there? The question mark seems to say, no. I doubt you do.

Oh. There's one little piece of evidence against this being about leaving the Nazis. Ulf didn't write the song as bandmate Jonas Joker, Bergerin wrote it. Also, they're not even using the most appropriate lyric, which is how good a person like you bring me joy. Which would also be a good, you know, if you fell in love with a Nazi, I guess. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that one line where it's like, the man whose name starts with a capital age is not the man, is the eye of the deceiver. which is a good one as well.

Also from Victoria, also, P.S. In early conspiracy, Corner Days, a conspiracy about Britney Spears being decapitated and replaced. And Jackie said she would do research and get back with her thought, but she never came back with an answer and it haunts me to this day. Hope to get some clarity.

Also tell MJ... Have you been watching the videos that Britney keeps posting? I mean, it has to be true. It's got to be true. I've just been like, mum's the word about Britney Spears since we did that three-parter on her

because it was so harrowing. I feel like it's like calling a ghost into your life. Oh, I still follow it. I read absolutely everything comes out. And I'm like, Jackie, nobody cares. Stop talking about Britney Spears. And I'm like, just like fervently read about it probably every other day with this conservatorship still happening. There are always blinds.

Yes. There are always blinds about Britney every single week. I obviously never use them. And lastly, also tell MJ congrats on their affirmation surgery and tell Jackie I am going to be sending her a handcrafted Garfield. wedding present soon, and I can't wait for little spookers to be here. Love you all, Vic. Thank you, Vic. I can't wait.

Oh, man. There you go. Do you believe? I want to believe. I've actually heard of this before, so it is not the most, like, I don't know if that makes me believe it more or not, but I have heard it. The lyrical citations make me less wanting to believe because it's just like, how can you do a lyrical analysis if I saw the sign?

The lyrics are so dumb. Yeah. I'm going to go ahead and say, I'm going to go ahead and say I believe because I have heard it from several different sources and that means it must be true. There you go. I believe too. There it is. I believe as well. All right.

Well, they're Nazis. And that's how, that's how easy it is. I was convinced neither of you would say you believe. But okay, there it is. There you have it. I guess it's true. Yeah, McCarthyism has come back. And they are Nazis and I am scared of them.

Oh, I saw the sign too. And I guess it twisted into a swast a sign. And but before I make up more words, we're going to have their shoutouts. Shout what? Shout. Yes. Let it all out. I will.

There's are the things that you wrote it about. Come on. We'll read them to you. Come on. Yesterday was Meredith's birthday and it was late. We're late in recording the episode the day after and I just want to say Meredith, thank you so much. And happy 36th birthday. And I'm sorry that we were late in getting you your birthday shout out.

But I just want to say, I do my hair toss, check my nails. Baby, how you feeling? Feel it happy birthday. Because Meredith needs a little bit more Lizzo in their life. I also want to say, and thank you so much for saying all the beautiful things that you said. I want to give a shout out and a birthday shout out to Veronica and Gomez. It's not Gomez's birthday. Gomez is a little baby Boston Terrier.

But Veronica is having a bit of a time right now and also having a birthday in the middle of all of it. And I just want you to remember that you're going to make it through. We love you so much. And happy, happy, happy birthday on the 26. Oh my God, there's so many. We're in cancer season, aren't we? We are.

Oh, welcome to Kansas season, everyone. Get scared. I'm scared of cancers. Am I allowed to say that? Yes. I think, but also I think a lot of the cancers in my life are in, like, very strong, important people, but I mean that, like, out of respect and fear. And, yep, I'm being open about it.

But there's another cancer in our life. And this cancer's name is Avari. Avari, I just want to say, happy birthday. Your sister wrote in and said, My little sister is a religious listener to page 7, and it's her birthday. We had a rocky time growing up, and when I was at the worst depths of my addiction, she was the one who stood by me through it all. She's an outdoor educator, a mental health first aid responder, an adventurer, and the effing coolest person I know. And she recently accepted her dream job in Greece.

It's her birthday on the 27th of June, and I think the only thing that could top her getting the job of her dreams is hearing a shout-out from the page seven crew. Avari, I love you endlessly. You are my role model, my best friend, and my hero. I'm so proud of the person you've become and the person you're on your way to being. Stop, I'm going to person to tears.

Oh my God. MJ, imagine Freddie writing this about Zelda. Does it make you want a burst into tears? That does make me want a person to tears. Oh, my God. Someday they're going to love each other, but first you just got to get through like 15 more years of them ripping each other apart.

But we don't need to think about all of that. That we do need to think about is Lisa is turning 33 on July 23rd. Because your husband wrote in who sent us pictures of, so Lisa re-inked dice to make them like the, what do you call them? The D&D dice. Holden? 20-sided die. Yeah, the 20-sided die. And so she makes these like really cool, different, awesome colored ones.

And Lisa, Mike sent us some of the pictures of your work. and it's absolutely amazing. And I hope you have such an amazing birthday. And there is another birthday shout out going out to one of Andy's best friends who also said, sorry, Holden, so I'm assuming it's a partner. Gabe Martinez! Gabe, I want to congratulate you on getting your movie into the Chattanooga Film Festival. More importantly, I want to thank you for making me get off my butt and start our own podcast together.

We were inspired greatly by many of the last podcast network, making who, let you watch that has been some of the most fun I've had in years, and I can't thank you enough. So check out who let you watch that wherever you get your podcast. And I want to give a wonderful happy birthday shout out to Sarah Henry, whose birthday is on June 28th, whose partner is giving you an amazing birthday shout out. Your shows provide us with endless entertainment and always keep us laughing, whether it's on long road trips or stuck at home due to plagues. She loves page seven, and more than once I've been trying to sleep when I overhear my wife's drunk hysterical laughter because she's watching a page seven Twilight Twitch stream.

We love you so much, Sarah. Thank you so much for watching. I hope you have an awesome birthday. We've got more, but so many, so many birthdays. This actually is not a birthday. This comes out from Krisha, who I need you to know, MJ, because this is a great birthday. because this is a great idea. MJ, they had a great idea for you for a tattoo.

Because you've talked about having a Lisa Simpson tattoo, but their idea was you having a Lisa Simpson tattoo but wearing clothes in the style of Bart. I'm no artist, but I just thought it would be perfect for you and would be a nice cherry on top of your transition. I love that idea. Which is also a lot. I immediately was like, oh, that is a great idea.

Thank you so much, Krisha. And I want to give a shout out to our girl, If you are a single man, preferably 6-7, but-light drinker, send them to Rachel. Rachel is recently broken up with. And so if you are one, if you are a 6-7, bud-light drinker and an LPN enthusiast hit us up over, yeah, we're making matches come to life. They've got to be out there. Because Rachel turned 30 this March and this, what a time to start their 30s,

where everything's kind of fall in apart. But again, that's when my fucking life fell apart. and I'm the best I've ever fucking been. So hit us up if you, you know, let's make some matches. Come do life. And one more goes out to Rob's wife, Tiffany, whose birthday is on June 29th. Rob and Tiffany came out to our Milwaukee show

and brought me this Angela tote from 90-day fiancé that it is my favorite tote. I use it all the time. And I just want to say thank you guys so much. so amazing. I ended up talking to them for such a long time. And Rob says about you, she is the best fucking wife and mom and she just quit her

shitty-ass job to find some happiness. Congratulations. Happy birthday. This has been your shoutouts and I feel great about it. This is time for the list? Y'all so does. Oh!

Who's on the list? Jackie, got to have that list. Oh, we got a fun one today. It is 15 weird ways celebrity couples met. Some of these I just, I was very excited about. Did you know that Sir Michael Kane met his wife by stalking her after he saw her in a commercial? That's sweet. Shakira Kane was in a 1971 coffee ad and Sir Michael was so entranced he was willing to go anywhere to meet her.

Luckily, she was in London too. Can you imagine? having the power to look at something and be like, I must find her. And I imagine every night he says that, what is it, the Princess of England, oh, you little orphans. She might not be an orphan,

but I imagine that he does the spiel from, ooh, ciderhouse rules? Ciderhouse rules, very good. Stocking's not ever okay, but for some reason Michael Cain can just make it seem so sweet. More called kind. Yeah, what do you know, if you're handsome,

And very talented and successful. Whoa, Alfie? No, nobody wants to bang Alfie. Yeah. Did you know that Lin-Manuel Miranda and his wife were brought together by Grand Theft Auto? That's fine. When they were standing outside after a hip-hop show

that he had invited her to, that's such a weird general. Oh, was it a hip hopist that they happened to? What if it was just freestyle Love Supreme, actually, probably? And she said the traffic was like in GTA, which sealed the deal for him. And I think it is actually kind of cute, being after a concert, making a joke like that to nobody and then you hearing him, being like, that's a fun thing to say. And I think it's kind of cute.

Right. Because you're like, oh, game a girl. Uh-oh, hashtag nerd girl. Nerd girl. Well, buddy Holly asked his wife out the first time he saw her and soon proposed. She was a receptionist at a music publishing company, and Holly walked in and asked her out. She agreed. And on the date, he proposed.

she agreed again. You know, sometimes you've got to shoot your shot and sometimes that shot gets taken and then he gets married. And hopefully it worked out well for them. Maybe it didn't. All I can think of is Gary Busey and I know that Buddy Halley is not Gary Busey

but I can't, then the two shall never be ripped apart. Well, Elon Musk. Elon Musk met Grimes thanks to a Google search he did for a tweet. He wanted to tweet a pun about Rococo Basilisk, you know, like you do.

So he Googled for basilisk pictures and came across a Grimes music video where she dressed up like a Rococo Basilisk. There you come. Man, what a weird match made in Mars that they found each other. It is. Match made in Mars. And here we have Jerry Lee Lewis. It was his cousin.

Yeah, I mean, it's easy. Sometimes you've got to go to a more reunion. And sometimes you just got to steal something. from the grocery store, like when Dog the Bounty Hunter and his wife met because she shoplifted a lemon. He posted her bond. And eventually, they started dating. They got married 20 years later in 2006. And then he laughed her.

He was cheating on her while she was dying. I don't follow closely about Dog the Bounty Hunter. I haven't read the books. I don't know why I am weirdly obsessed with Dog the Bounty Hunter and he's a piece of trash. That's why I don't talk about him on the show. Wait, that's kind of crazy. Sorry to jump ahead. Jerry Seinfeld, when he met his wife,

she was already engaged to another guy. Wasn't she also 17? Yeah, I thought his wife was famously. Super young. When they first started seeing each other, she was already engaged? Where are the parents? I want to say it was a different time,

but I feel like, I guess he is old. In my brain, I'm like, Jerry Seinfeld's young. Yeah, no, no, he was definitely an oldie. When he was married to this young, yuggy. Oh, yuck and a half. Well, I guess she was already engaged to somebody else, man, the ground running, I guess.

No one, man, I had to wait a long time to beg somebody to marry me. That's fine. Still hasn't even technically happened. Right. And Alan Alda and his wife met when they ate rum cake from the floor at a dinner party. The cake fell to the floor. Nobody wanted to eat it except for the two of them.

What a deeply Alan Alda way to meet his wife. That's so sweet. I love Alan Alda. Me too. Have you ever seen the movie same time next? year. That is what, that's like one of my mom's favorite movies and it's weird because Holden said the phrase Bridges of Madison County earlier. And same time next year is this amazing movie and it is Alan Alda and Ellen Burstyn and they meet, they have an, they have an affair one day, like one

weekend every year, almost their entire lives. And they like, know all about each other's families. And it is just the one weekend that they have. And they have. And they, go and they love each other, but it's a different kind of love, and they get older, and it's all it's fucking great. But sorry, I will just round this out that Kate Winslet met her husband during a house fire in the Caribbean. Very nice. She was staying at a house owned by Richard Branson that caught fire in the middle of the night, and in the chaos, she met Branson's nephew, Ned Rock and Roll. Is that his real name? That can't be his real name, Red Ned Rock and Roll. Now I'm going to look up Ned Rock and Roll.

That's all my list, but I'm looking up Ned Rock and Roll. And that's all my eyes. I don't think I can see. I think I'm going. Blind! Items! Oh, we can't see him. All right, here we go.

I'm trying to up my blind game here by throwing in some little context clues in some of these more ambiguous ones. So I don't have to follow up with more hints. Let's see if you can get it. This A-list, mostly movie actress, who is an Oscar winner and a real bombshell that used to be a young adult told a story. a story about how this A-plus list mostly movie actor that likes milk kept telling her during sex how much he wanted

to use her body as an ashtray. Oh my God, Charlize their own. How could you ever fucking do that? And who, what about the other ones? The other one's the only context clue was an actor that likes milk. Is it Sean Penn? Yes.

Oh, that makes so much sense. Oh, that fucking bastard. That was the, like, I just remember watch, it was an interview reading his article when Charlize Theron was Sean Penn hit her and she was like, I looked him dead in the eyes

and was like, you're never gonna fucking touch me ever again and walked out and then he was done. And it was just like, I'm so, I so respect Charlize Theron for many, many things but fucking, man, that is difficult to do and that is very, very scary. Man. He was like an ashtray.

What else we got? Okay, here, this doesn't have any context clues, but I should put something in there. There is a deep fake sex tape of this teen A-list singer. She knows it exists. They will use it against her to get her to bend it to their well.

A deep fake, so not real. I brought this up because I just realized this will start happening. Oh, that's so weird. Right? Where it could be this person, she just put some new music out. She's got an album coming out really soon.

Is it Billy Elish? Yes, queen. Thank you. But also, that's horrible. I know, I included this blind just for a topic of discussion. Like, that's totally something now that DeepFake is getting so much better. I think we're going to start having like, is this a real sex tape?

Like, left and right. That's a nightmare. Yeah. That's so disgusting. And then also, what do they do? Like, what do the, like, what do our people do about that? Do you have to, like, pay this person off? and do you have to, like, I don't understand, like, what then what's next after something like that?

Right. How do you prove that it's fake? Right? And I don't even know how you would prove that it's fake. How would you? There would always probably just be speculation. Either way. Here's the final one.

You're going to get it immediately. But it's just more of a, let's talk about it for two seconds before we close out. This singer has won many, many awards. He is A-List. He also talked to a divorce lawyer on the phone on Thursday. His model wifie, who loves food so. much has been having a rough time as of late. No.

No. No. No. Are they gonna get? No. But they love each other so much. I mean, I feel like whether it's true or not,

this blind would inevitably exist after everything that's been happening lately. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. So it could go either way in terms of the truth of this. I feel like this blind has to exist after everything that went down with Chrissy Tegan and how John Legend's really kind of tried to like be supportive

but hasn't really been like super coming out swinging for Chrissy. You know what I mean? I think he's trying to hope it dies down or maybe just gets out of this thing because it just got way out of control. When your brand is like, I'm the nicest guy. And then your wife is like fun, sassy. Like she's so makes fun of people. But then it turns out to be like, she's actually a bully.

Yeah. It's like a tough rebrand, you know? Because it was kind of working for them. Like he's so nice and playing. She's so funny. And now it's like, it turns out she's actually kind of neat. Yeah,

man. Well, you know, I don't want them to divorce. Yeah, me neither. But it is juicy. But it is juicy, so I had to include it.

Also, just so you know, Ned Rock and Roll changed his name back from Rock and Roll back to Smith. Because Kate Winslet was like, I can't handle this any. She literally said,

I fill out forms and I have to write down your name and she's like, I can't do this one? And he's like, yes, I'll change it back. That's great. Well, that's,

you do it. anything for Kate Winslet because she's the hottest woman. Oh my God, have you watched Mir of East Town? Yes, I do. Every week, I've watched Marr of East Town and she's so hot. Yeah. She's just so hot. You can't even make her look dowdy at all.

I know. They're like, oh, look at her unkempt hair and appearance. And I'm like, yes, please. Well, there you go. And I love to look at her because I can see again. Welcome back. items are done. And that's our show. We did it.

Yay! Thank you guys. So much for joining us. I had a great time today, and I'm all smiles, and I hope that you are, too. My name is Jackie Zabrowski. You can follow me on Jack. You can follow me on Instagram and Jack that worm. Jack.com slash

Jackie. And you can also come check out my new Twitch channel Tuesdays and Thursdays. I've got a show coming out. If you're listening to this on Thursday, tonight it is at 5 p.m. slash 8 p.m. Eastern Standard Time. Twitch.tv. forward slash, oh, no, it's Jackie. We're talking fashion with a personal stylist. And Lisa Rose has met and worked with both Holden and MJ and I on our fashion. And we're

going to talk fashion. You should come join us. All right. There you have it. Thank you so much. My name's Holden. I'm releasing an album tomorrow. It's called Right by Me. And it's about just me sort of making my statement about Ariana Grande. So we'll see how that goes. Check that out. That's on not Spotify, which is a new sort of Spotify that I made up in my head. Twitch.com.

Notify. It's on Notify. Twitch. com. Twitch.com slash Holdenaders ho. You know, Monday, Tuesday, Friday. I'm always doing it. It's always there.

It's always happening. Um, thanks to everybody too's reached out around the baby shower and everything and, and did stuff in the registry and stuff. I guess I'll say that on here as well because that's been like huge. And, uh, yeah, we love it. Patreon.com forward slash page seven podcast. That email page the number seven podcast at gmail.com. Please. I really, really use those blinds, those conspiracy theories. So keep them common. Thank you so much, y'all. And I'm MJ and I'm MJKL Kat on Instagram. Thank you so much. We'll talk to you soon. Bye, everybody. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors. You can support our shows by supporting them.

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