Page 7 - Ep. 418: One Maniac and Two Very Tired Parents

Episode Date: September 23, 2021

This week we are gossin' 'bout the masterpiece that is Montero, the wonders (and horrors) of breastfeeding, Ranch Crocs and beyond, the disappointing Emmy's, the amazing queer country of Orville Peck's cover of 'Fancy' and Lil Nas X's cover of 'Jolene', Elvira coming out, as well as the most adorable kidnapping ever. In Celebrity Conspiracy Corner; is Tommy Wiseau D. B. Cooper!? We also have the List, Blinds, and SHOUTS!Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7PodcastKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0 Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Because I want Beem me, me, na na, someone laity, Bernie. Oh my God, I'm obsessed with this fucking song. I'm obsessed with the music video of it. Thank you, Lil Nas X. This is the exact album that I needed.

It has made me cry. It has made me smile. I love the album. He did great. Welcome to page seven. We have a lot of things. I know. I'm so happy to be here.

This is Holden. And I just want to say, I have now tried two full bottles of breast milk on two different occasions and I fucking think it's delicious. I'm upset about this. Mail it to me. I will drink yours.

I will taste test them. I'll become like a connoisseur. A Somali of milk. So I'll be like, hmm, this woman lives in Nebraska. This woman, she plays tennis on the weekends. I'm catching some of, uh, she likes spare ribs. I'm going to become amazing at it. I'm going to be so good at, at,

breaking down the woman whose milk has... She's definitely... I think Zoloft, I believe. I'm catching notes of Zoloft. It's going to be great. You might need it. Because Holden to Sommiliki is here today. And the problem is...

It's not that I'm upset with you drinking the breast milk, holding. I love the milk. I know. It's natural. It's beautiful. The problem is you talking about making white Russians with the breast milk, and I'm nervous you're going to give it to me. And not...

I don't trust. any white Russian that you will give me when I walk into that. It'd be like soylent greens. It'll be like soilent white Russians. It's made of people. It's made from people. The thing is you've been inside of your wife, great. I think that you have, as long as Lex consents,

full rain over the breastings. Yes. But I as a person that have not been inside of your wife. I don't know if I have that privilege. Now, MJ, I would love to hear your feelings on this. But how would you feel? Like, let's say, like, a good friend of Gideons was like, but M.J., could you spare a couple? I mean, a friend of Gideon's.

I have a story that I don't think I've ever told on page seven. Oh, is it a milk story? And I think now I have to, even though it was not a story that I was planning on telling. Wow, okay, get the popcorn out. Yeah, let's get this milk chest. Let's take a tip to the lobby. Everybody gets your 3D glasses. We are here for a show.

And get our milky treat. It's not a story I'm thrilled to tell, to be honest, but I know that it will probably, hopefully, help some other breastfeeding parents out there feel better in their hour of need. And also, it feels better to talk about now that I don't have boobs anymore. Sianara, suckers.

So this is a part of my past. So you can get a thing called clogged ducts. Stop me if I've told the story. story. I don't think I've told it on this show before. So you can get a thing called clogged ducks where if you don't get... They're not able to quack. It's all plumbing in there, you know, inside your boobs. And so the plumbing can get clogged up if you don't empty out the pipes enough. So if you miss a feeding, if you miss a pump, right? And then it gets so much milk is so ready to get out and it gets all stuck. So this one time...

Gideon let me sleep in, and he got the baby first. And so, and it was so nice. And I woke up and I had, you know, this was when sleep is so valuable. And I woke up so happy, but immediately knew something was wrong because I felt like there was, you know, like an alien inside. And my boob trying to push out from the inside. Like it feels really bad if you are engorged and it's not coming out, right? And so usually the best way to solve a clogged duct is to have the baby nurse nurse it out.

But Freddie was a preemie. She was still very young and it was very hard. She struggled with nursing. And when you nurse with a clogged duct, when the baby nurses, nothing comes out because it's stuck. So baby has to like really nurse for a long time. You got to suck it out. You got to suck it out.

It's like Bobatite. But she kept sucking and sucking and nothing was coming out. So she would start screaming. because she's like, what the fuck is going on? That's always the best, is what I've noticed, is when the baby's just screaming at your tits. Yes, yes. It's like the best feeling ever.

I've definitely, I've definitely born witness to that and how fun that feels is a mother when that's happening. Right. And so you're like, I can't, and you're just like, you just are like, keep going, keep going. But she was too upset and too hungry, she wouldn't keep sucking. And so she kept not getting, and it already takes like 45 seconds for the milk

to even come anyway. but it was taking so long and so nothing was happening, nothing was happening. And, of course, my body keeps wanting to make the milk, so it keeps getting worse and worse and worse. And you can see it, too. Like, I had, like, a regular breastfeeding size boob on the left, and then, like, it, like, twice the size on the other side. It was bad. It was clogged. And if you don't deal with this, like, soon, you can get, it's really serious.

You can get an infection. You get, like, a high fever. It can be really dangerous. you can be admitted to a hospital, all this stuff. So I'm like freaking out. Yeah. I'm trying to pump. Pump won't get it out.

Baby can't get it out. I'm trying to hand express. That's not getting it out. Taking a million hot show. I'm doing everything the internet's telling me and nothing. Nothing, nothing is getting it out. And then my brother's partner was like, well, I saw that Kristen Bell and Dach Shepard had this happened to them once.

And Dax. They're just like us. Sucked it out for Kristen. Ah. And so I bring this to my husband. and he's like... What period of time? Is this ever just like an hour's time or something?

Oh, no, this is over the course of a whole day. Like, we're in like an escalating emergency. Yeah. Now it's bad because you get mastitis. Yes, exactly. Which we know someone who had that dealt with that. It's a nightmare. They literally said they wouldn't wish it to put in their worst enemy.

Yes. This is what's like looming, right? And again, you're in... I wish this is a video podcast. The face still expression. When I told Jackie how much I love the milk earlier... Because our beginning conversations now are just so different than they used to be. I just check out because I got nothing to say.

And I just hear it. And I'm like, all of this sounds horrifying. I just want to say this to all the people that know people that have children or that you just got to like shut down and let them get it out. And you're like, yes, yes, no, please keep saying about, oh, gosh. I say ouch, but I've never had it. So I don't know. Yeah.

So then did he do it? We tried the Dax Shepherd way. And even that didn't work. And so our marriage survived. And so that was not the thing that I wanted to happen in my marriage. But, but, um, did you laugh through it at least? Oh, yes. Just like look away and pretend like it wasn't happening.

We were both laughing. It was both. We were both very, we both, he was, you know, up for whatever to help. But I was just like, this is so terrible. I really don't want this in my life and in my marriage. And then it wasn't until the middle of the night. Finally, the baby was so groggy and so tired that she finally just kind of slept nurse

and we got it out. So we had to do that and it didn't even work. And we still didn't. Well, I mean, at least, you know, in ways it's good, it didn't work, right? Because then now Gideon doesn't have to have this memory of this geyser of milk shooting into his mouth.

I mean, I would have loved it probably. I'd say maybe he would have loved it. You have no idea. I mean, I do know. I'm already being cheated like a pariah because I love my own wife's milk. Like as if I'm supposed to, you know, if I'm some evil scientist man because I would drink straight up a gallon of my wife's milk from her breast. I don't think that you're alone and also old and age drinks you. There's a really big fetish community for that as well.

Oh, for sure. Yeah. I don't have dressed up like a big baby and stuff. But that's just to cope. I get that. You don't want to. Because I've learned if I turn into the baby, then Lexi's nursing too, right? but if I'm the daddy, I have to

tandem nursing, which is annoying. You know, you on one side, baby on the other side. And you, if you are a person that doesn't have children, you hear this conversation you're like, well, how can I be just as disgusted in my own home? Well, all you have to do is look up pictures of Soidi's team up of Crocs and Hidden Valley Ranch.

All right, it's a ranch crocs. It's a rough segue way. That's my segue. You did great. I just don't like the juxtaposition of the breast milk to the ranch. Fresh milk to ranch. Press milk to ranch, baby.

It's a no. I don't want to talk about ranch right now. Because what if ranch were calming out? Of those sweet tits of your wife's, Holden, how would you feel then? Would you feel like, oh, this is homegrown? Would you feel like it's garden fresh? Because we know that Hidden Valley Ranch is the utmost of the ranches, right? I believe it's up there with a helman's.

It's up there with the best foods, depending on the coast. but I don't know how I feel about rant. You know my biggest issue? And at this point, I concede. I know that crocs are comfortable. I understand my people wear them. They are, you know, you can wear them in the water. They're very easy to put on kids.

I understand. But now my problem is when I think about the ranch crocs, all I think about are the crocs smelling like ranch. That's what I keep thinking. Is it a Katie Perry situation? Yes. I don't want ranch feet. Yes, that's what I, you can't, and you can't call them ranch crocs without them smelling like ranch, because otherwise just call them white crocs.

You know what I mean? Well, no, because they have the little dots in it that kind of make them look like insulation. Yes, they have the ranch dots. They've got the little ranch dots. And what is that? Pepper? I mean, what even, I've never thought about what makes the ranch dots. But yes, they always have those little speckles in them.

And it's bespectaled, bespectacled. No, that means I'm wearing glasses. Yes, that is. But either way, it is, it's got, and I am wearing glasses, so I'm not lying. Just a big bowl of ranch with just glasses

floating in the ranch. I think that the speckles are probably like dill. I know that you put dill in a homemade ranch. Have you made homemade ranch? Have you made homemade ranch? Oh, that actually sounds good. That sounds fun.

See, this is the thing. I mean, I'm a proponent of ranch. I'm not even, I'm not an anti-ranch activist. I'm just saying that you guys know how I feel about the little crock hats. I forget what they. They're called the plug-em-ups.

Gibbets. Giblets. Ghibits. That's right. Ghibits. It's right. Now it just makes you think of your ducks. They've got clogged ducks on these crock.

And I'm scared of how much my throbby feet milk is going to be caught up in them. All right. Let's just say some kind of mad, like Sweden gets mad with power. And a bunch of Swedish, like, armed guards come in and hold you up at gumpoint. And they force you to wear a condiment crock of your, choosing. It will smell like it. It will look like it. And that's what you have to wear for the rest of your life. Or weirdly enough, a man from Sweden will blow your brains out in the town square. What are you going to go with? Sri Racha.

Ooh. Nice. That's a red. That's a kind of a, there's a sexiness to that. There's like, I don't fuck around. You don't fire me. I fire you. I kind of. I kind of feel like it's going to burn my feet, but I'm okay with that's a sacrifice. I'm willing to be. Remember, wait, don't you guys remember when Henry got in the bath filled with hot sauce? Yes. It was for something that we were there. I think we were shooting and he was like... No, it wasn't a bath of hot sauce.

What happened was he did this sketch called Lord of Man. It's actually where the name of the sketch comedy group Murder Fist came from. He was in this sketch where he beckons God down to fight him. And when he beckons God down, he screams, you will taste my murder fist. And at the end of the sketch, God comes down, God ends up being a woman. They have a fight. he loses. And at the very end...

Hear that? Oh my God. Ariana Grande has stolen things from us since the beginning. A million things. A million things that woman has stolen from us. Okay. Or whatever she is.

I think she's a robot. Because if you watch the first... And she definitely does a call back to Austin Powers. I think she's one of those robots from Austin Powers, right? And that's what I'm sticking to or whatever. And talk about someone being on Zoloft, by the way. I don't know why that came up again, but it did, and she's on it.

I know. But yeah, he, at the very end, our friends, Ryan Fike and John Moreno come out, dressed like crows. Like you do. And they proceeded to empty two huge bottles of Texas Pete on Henry.

What's funny is this sketch was like back in the day when we wrote way too long sketches. It was like a 15-minute long, 20-minute long sketch. What's the thing I always appreciated about you guys is you were not interested in brevity. No skin. Henry would slip on like a huge thing and fell down during this sketch. He was like covered in stuff.

He was beaten. He was, he just was exhausted by the end. And then they came out and they up into two giant bottles of Texas Pete all over him. None of us realized that like none of us got the memo about, I don't think any of us cooked at that point. So we didn't know that like if you get hot sauce on your skin, it actually burns.

Like we just didn't know that. So after the first show, we learned that lesson. We used fake hot sauce. We had like two more shows. I remember too because it was this big celebration. It was such a hard show to pull off. Henry was in like 75% of the show.

He like clearly pulled the most weight. He was exhausted at the end. And so we're all at my place like having our like celebration after that show. And he was literally like crulled up in the fetal in his apartment with cold water pouring down on him in the shower instead of like partying with all of us. Because he literally, his whole body was on fire. Oh my God. So I think you could do just meet MJ. You've been through a lot.

I think you can handle the pain. I thought that this story was going to be about balls. I figured it might only hurt balls because of the thin skin. No, it hurts your whole. Do not empty a bottle of hot sauce on yourself. It will burn your skin. You will be beat red. He did show up at the party eventually.

He was like he had a sunburn is what he looked like all over his body. It was really, really bad. Also, I'm going to go with gray Poupon for my eyes. Good choice. Mustard was going to be my first choice. Oh, yeah, because that's a great smell. That's a smell that says, let's be friends. Let's fucking get crazy.

Let's take our fucking generals out of our pants and run around and jump into the fountain in the center of town. Yeah. Right? That's kind of what that says, in my opinion. Of course. What about you, Jackie? Worsher, I guess. I think that I think meaty feed is the way to be.

Savory feet. Yeah, you want, like, to get that umami. Umami feed. mommy coming out. You just dashed it. Because like I'm not going to put mayo on there. You all know I love mayo, but not for my feet. No.

Although my feet would be very soft. But then I'd feel like I'd have to get rid of mayo as a condiment. Yeah. And Worcestershire, you never, you never just like sucking back on Worcestershire like you do with mayo or bond. But I think that like, you know, a little dash will do you. But if you're slathering up down there, I say a whole pot will do you. I say God bless it.

Oh, say God bless it. You might just look down and see a couple of. prime ribs sitting on your feet if you've got some Worcestershire crocks for sure and that's just free meat. You can't turn that. Barbecue sauce would also be good. I would do barbecue sauce. If I was in Texas, which, you know, I'm probably not going to go to because it's just, you know,

I mean, come on. What's going on down there? I want my baby back feet. I would have truly just, I wish Chili's held up, man. Chili's super doesn't hold up. It makes me sad. I want there to be a new. Outback is like kind of the only one that does it just right.

Oh, yeah. no rules just right. This is the energy, this is like the energy of man, just one maniac and two very tired parents. This I think of what this show always needed. We had absolutely no idea that this is what we needed, but I think it like provides the just frenetic energy

that I always crave. I've also been dying to understand that like sometimes artists come around, what is his name, Travis Scott recently, I feel like, They just are so good at promo that you have to hear their name. Soidi is the new version of that where it's like, good Lord, Suiti. I had never heard of you before. I clearly was not trying to. And I have to know who you are.

But now Soidi also has partnerships. I know that she does at McDonald's. Because I saw like a bit, there's a big billboard over by my house that Soidi's partnership with McDonald's and how they, like, She's got a specific meal that is, like, I mean, I will say, I guess get that money. Get that fucking money because that's a lot. Yeah, I would assume.

For whoever wants to buy the ranch cracks, if that's you, then. I guess. There's, this generation is so much better at promoting themselves and getting over in ridiculous ways. I think that, I think, well, I mean, it's not too crazy to think of, too, with like, especially the grunge and everything, but even the alternative or indie movement afterwards, way to taking themselves too seriously. Yes. And this generation knows how to just be stupid with it.

Yeah. You know, is that what the kids say? They know to get all dumb with it, right? I think that's what the kids say. And I appreciate that. And I appreciate that. That's a lot of the reason why things like the Emmys are not transferring to the younger generation because, like, they're busy having fun and, like, breaking boundaries.

And then the Emmys comes along, like the dinosaur that it is. And it's like, we can be relevant. And I imagine it's like, oh, the brontosaurus. Yeah, I'm talking about the one that dies. Ooh, what's it called? Tiny dinosaurs, sad dinosaurs. The land before time. The land before time.

Yeah, yeah. Petrie. Yeah, yeah. Emmys are like, we're not breaking boundaries. We're breaking frown trees. Yeah, they're bringing boundaries. Because we'll make you frown. That is.

I'm the Emmys monster and I say TV bad. I realized the Emmys were on because of Twitter And every single tweet I read Made me want to do anything but watch the Emmys I watched it man I am in the generation that sits down on a Sunday night And it's like oh an award show is on I'll watch it Yeah, and so I watched it and I did not like it

It was you know especially after coming off of the VMAs We talked about it's just like if you're gonna do an award show And music has a has an advantage right we talked about this with the Grammys too. Seeing live music being performed is going to make an award show fun. And the Oscars can usually do that with like at least one song. The, you know, the Grammys can do it. VMAs did a great job.

And the Emmys is just like, man, none of the sketches will ever work. Stop doing the sketches. There's never been a memorable. I mean, maybe I'm wrong, but certainly in the last 10 years in my adult life, I've never been like, oh, like that great joke. from that Emmy's sketch. It's just always falls flat, and it falls more flat

because it's like the room is too big to laugh at a sketch. The audience at home, if they're laughing, you can't hear them. So it's just always going to feel like you're doing a joke into the void. It will never, ever, ever work. Here's what they should do.

Scene work. All right? Bring it back. Take it out of acting class. Put it on the stage. I want to see scenes from all of life. They'll do warm-ups. We, as an audience,

will vote together to give them notes but we'll give them different notes and stuff and they'll try the scene again and they'll all be scenes from their own TV shows that they do. And they make them switch characters of like, okay, you're gonna present but you're not gonna know which character you're gonna play as. See, this is the thing. Is that we even saw that everyone, like I saw

that people were making japs about like the Schitt's Creek the foursome when they were giving out an award and you didn't know like it's like it seemed like the teleprompter stopped working. The audience didn't know if that was on purpose, if it was a mistake. And if like the four of them trying to figure out, I don't, I'm sure.

They are four very seasoned performers as well as like at least two insanely seasoned improvisers. If that was on purpose, we, like it would have been better than that. And I think that it was a mistake. So things like that where it's like, it's not a place where people to play. And yet that opening,

the opening scene where everybody's singing the biz marquee RIP song. Yeah, I'm glad they did the biz trip. Yeah. was like, everyone was like, but then it was just like, it was all over the place. It's like no one knew what was going on. Well, it's because I could at least see they were trying to have fun with it of like, let's like get people involved. Yeah.

Like, we'll do, like, we'll have fun with it. But people don't want people to have fun with it as well as like, so people come into it of like, well, but it's this uptight ceremony. Right. But then you want us to like riff and like you're down with us to like do whatever we want, but like do they want that? You know? So it's like, I feel like it's trash.

between, like, you all need to update it or stop doing, you know, it's like, we're do it in a different way. You're so right, because if the Schitts Creek cast can't, which everybody was excited to see, as you said, like, not only are they seasoned performers, seasoned improvisers, but they have chemistry with each other, deep trust with each other. And even that, I, like, really wanted to like it. I was like, this is fun. Oh, no one knows what's going on.

And it's like that thing where it's like, oh, we're doing a joke about how something's going wrong. And then everyone's like, okay, it's a bit. But then it's like not landing. So people are like maybe it's not a bit. It's like if even they can't do it, then there's, if nobody can do it if they can't do it. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Yeah. And I mean, I will say like so happy McHill Cole won because if you haven't seen I may destroy you, please stop everything.

I will say trigger warning. It is upsetting. But it's one of the best shows I've seen a very long time. Mikkel O'Cole is absolutely amazing and I'm so happy that she won. Of course, I'm a huge Ted Lassow fan but also Reels Quick Sidebar because y'all know I can't not bring this up.

The fact that I know M.J. That you haven't started watching Ted Lassow. Yeah, I'm sorry. And the fact that Roy Kent, I posted about it a lot today, Roy Kent in, who won Brett Goldstein, who won in Ted Lassow. I love his character in Ted Lassow.

But apparently, like, four, years ago, he did an abridged version of Muppet Christmas Carol where he sang all the Muppet Christmas Carol songs to raise money for Parkinson's UK because he's also like, he's an improviser. And in the show, he's just not that guy at all. So seeing him on stage, pretending like he's Kermit, pretending like he's all the ghosts and doing all. Yeah, I didn't even realize he was the creamy dream for a lot of the man lovers out there. But yeah, he's apparently the big

sort of sexual fun for a lot of people right now. He's the big sexual fun. Yeah, I got some sexual fun. I got stewing somewhere on a back burner. It's stewed for so long. It's gotten viscous like a stoop.

Talk about a seasoned performer. Put some paprika on that fuck. Yeah, baby. We're the flex in it. I've been sitting on that seasoned performer joke I want to say too for like a solid 10 minutes now. Someone mentioned it before with Chitz Creek and I was like, you know, it would be funny if I made a joke about them having ranch seasoning.

Actual cooking seasonings on the... Proudered ranch seasoning, am I right? Yeah. That is the reaction time of a tired pair. I'm going to make a joke about ranch at some point. I'm glad to let Lassau got a ton of love. It is like, you know what? We'll say with the Emmys, with everything that won and everything it's being talked about,

I'm like, I've got good taste in the TV. These are all the shows that I've been enjoying as of late, The Crown, Ted Lasso. I know I'm not special for enjoying these shows, but I'm like, you know what? I watch the good stuff. I also watch a little bit of the bad stuff, you know what I'm saying? But yeah, I feel like it's at least nice to see, too. I'm so used to feeling like the odd one out, especially at the Academy Awards where you're just like, that one over that?

And some of that happened. But I think the Emmys at least does give credit where credit is actually due. And also, Ted Lassow, the TV show is funny. I don't know why there's this weird thing trying to be like, oh, it's just like positivity, but it's not jokes. It's like it's wall-to-wall jokes.

It's actually a funny show. So I don't know why that's an opinion. Oh, were people upset about that side of it? No, there's this new thing. And I think, again, it's literally because it's not a show about assholes. And so they're conflating them. with it being actually funny.

Yeah, I saw this too. People were like, oh, Shitz Creek and Ted Lassau are both so positive and we like don't want shows to trend in a positive direction. They're just cold comedies, but they're not funny. It's like, no, they're actually also a lot of jokes and the people are positive. So whatever, okay? And maybe we need a little positivity in our lives. You know what I'm saying?

Oh, da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da. Oh, my God. And everything is it. It's bad. And then the little boy frog dies. And he dies. Well, he does die in one of the timelines. He wants to see.

Tiny Tim, who did not die. One of my favorite lines of the movie. Who did not die. And of course, Jason Sadeca is just looking like, oh, oh. Because he got into so much trouble last year for looking like such a schlub. Of course. So he bumped it up. Oh, right.

But he did look like a wayfair couch. That was a tweet I did agree with. Yes, I also saw that tweet in Jay. Come on. That's funny. And it's so true. And it's so the new look that so many of the dudes on the red carpet are going with. I wish he had worn his same exact same outfit from last.

That would have been funny. How fucking amazing would that have been. But on the red carpet, that would have been so fucking just baller if he had done that. But whatever. It would have definitely, it would have made a splash, I guess. But I'm going to go ahead and say that he probably wasn't allowed to me. And that is fine. And I do, you know what, I, there are sometimes in my.

life that I'm like, Jackie, you can't just love what everybody loves. Ted Lassel was one of those that I went into it being like, all right, let's see. I don't give a shit about soccer. Fine. I'm fucking love it. So it's just, you know, it's, I mean, I had you at Friday Night Lights, MJ. Remember of like back in the dizzy of like, well. This is my history as a, as a born hater.

I've always been like, if something is popular, it's probably bad. And then, and even with Schitt's Creek, I was like, everyone, granted, a lot of people, whose comedy taste I really, really trust, liked it. But I was like, everyone likes this. Could something really be that good if everybody likes it? I don't know why I was thinking that. Because everybody likes a rest of development. Everybody likes plenty of really, really good things.

And I was just like, oh, it's probably not that good. And then I watched it and I was like, where was I this whole time? I could have been talking about this with people as it was happening. I'm glad you bring up Friday Night Lights, Jackie. I wonder if I could actually trace back my deciding to give things a better shot to my enjoyment of Friday Night Lights because I think that that and every way at the time that show represented

what in my head would be everything I'm like not about. Yeah. You know what I mean? And then I like fell in love with that TV show. That might have been the start of me being like maybe I should start watching musicals again. Maybe I like it's so interesting

the timeline of this and I'd love to see more talk about this on the Facebook page I never go on or whatever it is, a discourse about this of like when did you, when did you, like, what are the things you decided you were not about in your childhood, especially in your adolescence, right? And when did you break out of that thinking, right? Because for the longest time in my head, I decided when I was a little boy that I don't like musicals.

And my whole reasoning, too, was just like, who just breaks into song? It doesn't make any sense. It's just like, that's, you know what I mean? I want to see, like, real shit. I want to see a guy, you know, get his fucking head ripped off by a rat or something. You know what I mean? Or like a man dressed like a clown, like pissing on a dog or something. Oh, yeah, that is fun.

I can see what you would want to. But I want real shit because maybe it was because I lived in a town that could represent the beginning of a musical. Very cookie cutter, very, very, like, pristine in all these ways. And I wanted to, like, see, you know, I wanted to see skull and bone, you know, skeleton men or something like that, hitting old lady or something, right? Clockwork Orange or something. And cut to shit, man. I mean, what was I in my late?

I don't even think I was in my 20s. I think I was in my 30s before I was like, oh, I like Disney movies and musicals and, you know? And like, shit that makes me cry. And, oh, I'm not afraid to cry watching a movie. I mean, shit, was that 30s? So I think that's an interesting, like, what were you against and so not about?

And now what are you, like, obsessed with that was that thing. You know what I mean? I did that with country music for such a long time. I felt a very specific way. I think going from New York to moving to Florida, and I was like, fuck country music. I hate all country music.

And it's, I mean, you know, I did, you know, date a country musician for a long time, and that changed my idea of it. But then you see people like Lil Nas X and Orville Peck. So we were talking about Orville Peck before we started recording because we were talking about the Lil Nas X, a Jolene performance,

which was wonderful. And then I started talking to MJ that I forgot that I haven't shoved Orville Peck down your throat yet because I'm absolutely obsessed with Orville Peck who did a cover of the Reba McIntyre song about, Here's a one chance

fancy, don't let me down. And it's one of those of where it's a story song about a mother using her daughter from the perspective of her daughter to be sold, essentially. And Orville Peck sings the song from the daughter's perspective as well. Would you give such an interesting take on it? But also, his voice is amazing. And then Lil Nas X now coming out clutch with Jolene,

but we did discuss this. And I'd like to talk about it. About how we feel about the cover. My slightly hot take, I hope it's not too hot. everyone knows who listens to the show, hopefully, that I will die for Lil Nas X. I think that the Montero album is a fucking masterpiece. I think every live performance he's ever done on television

is like an act of mastery. And like just I fucking absolutely feel blessed to live in his timeline. Like we live in the presence of greatness. I was so excited to watch the Jolene video. I saw it when I was in class and I was like, I have to wait until classes over to watch this. And I loved it. Don't get me wrong.

To me, the most exciting thing about him doing Jolene is the queering of Jolene. We've never seen a queer Jolene. And also many male singers, straight male singers, default, I guess, to straight. Like, if they cover a song, those originally sung by a woman, they change all the pronouns, which is like so annoying to me. And it's like, why do you have to be like, yeah, this song is actually about loving a man, but no, now it's about loving a woman. Like, okay, fine, whatever. But, like, I love that Lil Nas X just sang Jolene as him, you know, as Lilna's X. And so it becomes this

just like he's singing about his man and Jolene tried to take away. And I just loved the beautiful queerness of it. Like I thought it was amazing. And he did a great job and his presence, his

you know, again, watching him perform live. Incredible. My only hot take is that if we're talking about recent highly pop star covers of Jolene, I'm gonna have to give it to Miley first because Miley is a voice and Jolene is a song that you sing and I feel like Lil Nas X is a performer. No doubt a performer because you see the video of him.

Yeah. And it's like you're feeling. And if you were, if I was that close to him, like, and when he sang like his version of a live, uh, stripped down version of Montero as well. like, it's great. It's haunting. It's beautiful. You're right there with him.

But what you were saying was like, but Miley, when she sings it like, see, like you can feel the dolly in her soul. You know, and they feel like there is a difference. Yes. And none of this is as a negative critique of Jolene. It's just that I immediately upon watching Lil Nas X's cover of Jolene, I felt thrilled. I felt euphoric. I felt so, again, just so pleased that this.

queer artist is doing these incredible things that, like, incredibly in the year 2021, still haven't ever been done before. And then I immediately wanted to go watch Miley do it, too. And I, and so it's just a different experience. Like, I don't think that it's a controversial thing to say that, like, Lil Nas X can sing, but he's not like, it's not his voice that makes him who he is. It's everything. It's his performance. It's like, and whereas Miley, you could take or leave everything about her, but you can't, you can't not, you can't say that She doesn't have a voice, right? But honestly, I will say I do prefer the B side of that.

It's about Jolene breaking her leg. It's called Eileen. All right. Daddy Holden's here. I was sitting on that for so long. Daddy hold it. Ready. I can feel it.

I can feel her energy from here. It's also because I've been watching, I'm so glad they brought it back. I'm watching the Norm McDonald show on Netflix. and it's full of that as he makes his guests read really bad jokes at the end of every episode. And so I'm just like in that mindset of just like the joyousness of sharing like a crickety, I would say, just clunker joke is not beyond me. I love it.

I do. I absolutely love it. I also feel that I would be remiss even though because I was just talking about how I started liking country music. Like the fancy song that I know the Reba McIntyre version of it, but the original is done by Bobby Gentry. And I think that like if, like, if you love what Lil Nas X just did with Jolene, MJ, I implore you to listen to Orville Peck's fans. And check out as well, MJ and everyone.

If you haven't checked out the Trixie Mattel Orville Peck cover of Jackson. Uh, that is fantastic. I'm here for this queer country. And I finally got around one of those movies I saw during my, I like sitting in the dark watching movies with a baby for a month movies was Trixie Mattel's moving parts. The documentary about Trixie absolutely loved it. I'm obsessed with Trixie Mattel. And the album is like her music is so good. And I just like, it's so cool. It's so weird how drag is treated in terms of other art forms, I guess I would say. And I just think like when I saw

Trixie do stand up, I thought it was some of the best stand-up I've ever seen. And I think Trixie's album is like some great country music that only gets not treated as such just because of the drag element, I feel like, in a lot of ways. And it's so silly because he is a fantastic artist, you know, a musician in his own right outside of just like the whole dressing, you know, dressing up and being Trixie. Yeah. And also I will say if you want to watch that that's what I want music video, come hang out on Friday with Holden and I because we are going to, you know, We watched it a couple times last week. We're gonna watch it more this week because of the broke back mountain element of it.

I was, I'm so, I'm happy that I watched it first live in front of everybody. But I also was like, I need to like sit with this music video and then I have. And I have been doing it. And I love it. And the album is just so good. It's like such a journey of like, you know, and you forget he's only 22. And it's like, you know, it's like so. half of it is like so boppy and poppy and like you know horny and and but also like some of it is just so sad and so lonely and like so powerful like the album is really like I think it's just a absolute mastery like and and just a beautiful like tale of like queer like thirstiness it's not even really it's like queer love but it also is just like queer like queer love but it also is just like queer.

youth, you know, like, it's just like being young and lonely and horny and thirsty and falling in love and like realizing it won't work. And it's just like, it's just absolutely gorgeous. And also before, I know that we can't not speak about this. Can we get a guffa for Elvira? Oh, I'm sorry. I was going to say, Tosea Nikki Mana. Nikki Mana. I know. I was kidding. I know the cousins with the balls. I know. All I know there's no guffa. She gets no guvah with this. Oh my God. Yeah, spreading misinformation.

That's what we really need right now. No. Oh, come on. You know, my balls, I think, got a little bigger after I got my second fighter. I want to start seeing daily ball measurements from me. Yeah, yeah, because I was like, I looked down and I was like, why do I have Ed's balls? Oh, no, actually. That's just the vaccine.

Not from the vaccine. No, we're talking about Elvira. We're talking about Elvira finally coming out about her 19-year, relationship with her partner that she released in the, um, the autobiography that just came out, which I have, and I cannot wait to start reading it, which is called yours cruelly, Elvira, memoirs of the mistress of the dark. Please listen to our pop history on Elvira that we put out last year, um, because talk about an inspirational fucking woman that has made it work. Everybody knows Elvira. You know who, at least like you have heard of Elvira. And is it a lot of, and is

that crazy of someone who's like, it is a very similar background of RuPaul when it's just like, well, they just kept working and they worked their ass off. And if something didn't work, well, you take it and reconfigure it

and try to make this work. Let's try to sell this. Let's do this. And talk about just someone that put their whole life into this and made it work. And I'm just so happy because I feel like it was something

that we discussed in the episode of like, I hope she's happy. I do hope that she is because it seemed like she relied on partnerships for a very long time in her life and that it seemed like she shed it all. And it's sad because I think that she didn't talk about this. I hope that she didn't talk about it

because it was something that she preferred to be quiet about and not something that she felt like she couldn't. No, I mean, I know she definitely said, and what I read, that she was worried about the kind of effect it can have on your career and has seen, you know, acknowledging that other people who came out, it had an effect in their career. It's kind of funny because I feel like she went almost overnight from like, like, horny dudes 80s sex icon to kind of a queer icon in a lot of

ways. And people talking about how what she does is like very similar to drag. And especially if you learn her story, I mean, she was touring around with a bunch of gay guys doing a big, like, fun cabaret show and how she, you know, she lost a lot of close friends through the, AIDS epidemic and, you know, has always been not just deeply inspired by queer culture for her own creation of Elvira, but also incredibly affected, you know, personally by just the whole thing throughout her entire life. So, but what's also like, not to fetishize it too much, but it's also like so hot because this was just like a friend of hers. She wasn't like, you know, she, she never thought she was, you know, queer necessarily. And they just,

fucking sauceed it up real hard. This sexy... They fell in love holding. Well, no. If you read about what she's... You know, it's really sexy. How it kind of went down. It was just very, like, out of nowhere,

and they were just hanging out a lot, and it was a trainer at the gym she went to, and, you know, that just kind of came... And then she's talking about how, you know, their lusty sex was better than anything she'd ever had before. You know what I mean? And then you're just like, wow, I want to, you know, be a horny fly on that wall.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Especially, like, how, I mean, I feel the same way, but 12-year-old me and how I felt about Oviro? My God. See, I needed that. Like, I wish that it was something that I knew that I could look to her and be like, okay, well, then you can have it all.

You can be it all. But, you know, and I'm just proud of her the fact that she feels good enough that she's down to say it loud. And she's 70. My God, she looks amazing. Yeah, I kind of just love it as more of a story of like, no matter how old do you get, I mean, you may not be done understanding yourself

and like knowing who you are. You know, I think that that's what's so cool. And that if you can give yourself over to it, it doesn't matter, man, woman, whoever. I mean, you know, if you fall in love, you fall in love. I think that's just really cool that at, because that means that it's been for the past 19 years, right? That means we're talking about a 50-year-old person. You never stop changing. straight who never, you know, according to her in this writing at least, who never had any sort of

thoughts of that kind. And now she's been in almost two decades in relationship with another woman. I mean, that's like a really incredible thing to happen that late in life. It gives, I think, everyone hope that, you know, no matter where you're at, I mean, you can totally find like a whole new avenue and a whole new like area for yourself that, you know, can bring light and joy. You can choose again every day. Every day is a choice. And it makes me. excited for all of our futures. And just like, you know, I know that when you sit with the screaming kids

and you're just like, maybe, maybe tomorrow, maybe tomorrow she won't scream through the day. Or I'll be, I'll just go. I'll just go to the desert. That's one too. I can choose to go to the desert. Yeah, you choose to be a scarecrow from now on.

I think that, you know what, what a way, there's the diet I need. Get me the scarecrow diet. I'm going out to the desert. Just put me out there. Do you they got scarecrows in the desert? I don't think so. Have you seen my mask?

I'm not sure, actually. That was from Batman. That was a Batman ref, and I knew that because I'm a nerd girl. Wow, you're such a dork, Jackie. I'm a dork. But anyways, Ballgate, everyone's talking about it. It's the new celebrity conspity.

No, I'm just kidding. But do you want to hear the new celebrity? I do. And it was like, it better not be Ballgame. You sent us multiple articles about Ballgate. I know everything about Ballgate, and now we're just not going to talk about it. No, we're not talking about it.

We're not talking about it. Friends balls got bigger after taking the vaccine. I just love, all I want to say is I just love how when the internet started, the whole idea was like, we'll have all the knowledge at our fingertips. The human race will evolve in such an amazing way because education now will be like free to all. And now all it's just become is a bunch of people, quote unquote, doing their own research and just how bad misinformation has spread. And this is just the perfect fucking example. I think in the future, talking about having kids in like 10, 20 years, it's like, what? Why did the internet, was it such a shit show?

I will literally point to ballgate. And I will just be like, because this was the result of having all information at your fingertips at all times. Yeah, but hold in, like 30 years ago, you wouldn't have heard about the puppy that was held hostage by the monkey in the tree. I know you were going to. I'm not letting go. The monkey fell in love with the puppy and wanted to protect the puppy.

I feel like this monkey is being very mistreated in this story. The monkey did not harm this puppy. The monkey clearly wanted the puppy as a pet, and I think we should have let the monkey have the puppy. Monkey had no demands. I think if you call it a kidnapping or an abduction, there's got to be demands.

Maybe that's just with the word ransom, but like that, right, that monkey was just holding that puppy, not dropping it, trying to be real careful, take care of the puppy. And honestly, puppy is probably hopefully going to have a better life now because he was just a stray found on the streets by the monkey.

and was apducted and is now fell out of the tree and was fine and a bunch of people were there to help the puppy. I agree with you. I think that the ape is a hero. I think that it is, I'm glad that we just had, we had to talk about it because the New York Post did write a whole article about how in Malaysia a puppy was held hostage by a wild animal. Right. Hostage is an aggressive term. The monkey was treating the puppy like it was its child. It may be it was us that were the monkeys all along.

Whoa. Oh, no, I was wrong. It was Earth all along. Yes, you finally made a monkey. Yes, we finally made a monkey. Yes, we finally made a monkey out of me. I love you, Dr. Zeyas. You've been watching so much Simpsons, Holden.

It's very funny. Yes. I haven't gotten to that episode yet, though, actually. But yes, I absolutely love. That's probably, might be one of my favorites of all time, but this might be one of my favorite celebrity conspiracies all the time of all time. Hit me with the share. Do you believe it?

Is Tommy Wissot D.B. Cooper? What? All right. This one comes in from Andrew. I love this whole theory because, you know what? This is one that speaks to my heart that I feel like could be true. I will explain who D.B. Cooper is, by the way, if you don't know. So here's the theory.

Tommy Wissot. Director of the infamously so bad it's good film, the room and beloved eccentric is in fact also the source of one of the greatest unsolved mysteries of all time. If you're not aware, D.B. Cooper's name of a man or at least the alias a man went by back in 1971 who

hijacked a Boeing 727 collected $2,000 in ransom money and then parachuted from the plane. His body was never discovered nor was the money and so the crime has remained unsolved since that time. However, some believe that he is the man known as Tommy was so. If you don't know,

D. B. Cooper's one of my, like, it's one of the best, every Reddit thread that's like, what's the most crazy unsolved mystery of all time? D.B. Cooper's always in there. It's, it's this great, wonderful mystery. The, potentially a man who got away with such a wild stunt. You know, most believe he probably died upon impact. Of course. I'm sure that is what happened. But it would be interesting because Tommy Wissot, so then that would indicate that Tommy Wissot was, was like 16 at the time. Yes.

So that would make sense because I remember with all, I mean, you know, you're not allowed to fly the plane that young, but he knew how to fly the plane. Maybe he wanted to show everyone that, yes, I could get my pilots license. There you go.

That's exactly what I, exactly. And, you know, here's some other connectors. Both men's backgrounds remain large. The Mysterious. Tommy always claimed to be from New Orleans and born in 1969, which must be untrue, due to him clearly being far older

than a man born in 1969. One of the biggest things about him is that he's clearly way older than the age he says he is, right? They're also notable for having odd speaking styles. Cooper apparently asked for, quote, negotiable American currency

and Wissot in the past has said stuff like, it's bullshit, I did not hit her, I did not, oh hi, hi, Mark, in his bewildering film. The nature of Wissot's fortune has always been speculated on as he came, has he made the room using $6 million of his own money. Of course, $200,000 with inflation is millions today.

And maybe if he invested well, this, that, and the other. But yes, if you've read anything, I read the book written by his co-star that was hilarious and great, and they made the movie out of it with the guy that's now in sex person jail or whatever, or whatever now. Fucking should be. By the way, why isn't there a sex person jail? First of all, can we just have a jail? James fucking Franco.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sex person jail. It's a shame. Just in our brains. Yeah, I'd rather he'd be in my horny jail, but he's in his own jail. I know, but now he's in, yes. Bad man jail. But the book is great, by the way, and I was a really fun read.

And, yeah, a lot of the weirdness that he always speculated on, I was just like, where did this guy come from? Where did this money come from? He could never figure it out. That was like such a big kind of point, especially because Wissot is such like a weird eccentric, I'm going to go ahead and say more. I don't think he was investing.

Yeah, I don't know if he was invested. But you know, yeah, but then how did he get that money? So also their heights seem to match up and they both are very fond of dark sunglasses. Whoa, that must be the two things that narrow it down completely. Yes. I will also say, and it would make sense that I feel like D.B. Cooper would. I did see Tommy Wissot.

in North Hollywood. And I didn't know if it was him, but there was this huge extended cab, white Hummer. And someone was driving like an asshole, and I thought that it was him. And then I saw out the window. He had this big stogie.

And then on every finger, he had these huge rings. I was like, that's got to be. Tommy was. And then we got it next to him, and it was. And he just had, like, with the big sunglasses and just so many chains.

And I was like, now that looks like a man that would steal a plane. I believe it. Yes, thank you. And I will say Tomooso did give a response. Thank you. I agree with you though.

He gave a response? Yes, Tom and So was asked by someone on a Reddit AMA. Have you ever heard the speculation that your D.B. Cooper? If so, where did you hide the 727? Wissot's response was, uh, dot, dot, dot, meow, N-E-O-W-W-W. I feel like this has had like Kisselwood respect. Yeah.

But what people speculate is incorrect referencing. By the way, that's the rest of the sense. But what people speculate is incorrect referencing, not familiar with that. Looking right now, they are wrong. Let's put it that way. I don't know.

That just seems like a wiggly response. Yeah, very dubious. MJ, what do you think? Wow, I honestly really just want to spend the rest of my night reading about D.B. Cooper. Yes. This is the kind of shit I love.

Yeah, you will. You should. You should. So, yeah, hell yeah, I believe it. Awesome. I love it. Also, sorry, real big sidebar, but MJ, Unsolved Mystery is coming back.

Oh, I know. New Unolved Mysteries coming back out. I can't wait. I'm kind of surprised there hasn't been like a Netflix series on D.B. Cooper. It's a great story. I'm also surprised there hasn't been a Netflix series called Unsolved Mystery update. Right. You know, the best thing about the Robert Stack Unsolved Mysteries is that there was always updates because they always found shit, but maybe that's not happening this time around, but...

They did release some updates. There were a couple of from the season that was released. I don't know if they put it on Netflix, but your girl is a crazy person. So I had looked it up and I will send you the update. Like, some of them actually did get further detection. Fuck yeah. Detection? Yeah, I said detection. Yeah, they should just call it. all it solved mysteries. Yeah. All the, all the rubber stack ones

are fully solved. But, you know, I guess that's the power of television. There's also, I just saw there's another Britney Spears documentary coming to Netflix this time. And it is actually one

I'm really looking forward to. It's the same, it's the same person, the same director that did, I love you now die. And also, like, is doing a bunch of docs. I think that they only have like

five or six docs out. But it, I, I'm gonna fucking watch a shit out of it. Do you also see Britney Spears is back on Instagram? Oh no. Oh no.

She's back though. Don't worry. The pictures are here. That's the one thing where I'm like, can we, I like, fighting for Britney's so hard, but at the same time, I gotta stop the part

where I think that what she's doing to Instagram, is it all reasonable or, okay? But I will say, I don't think it's the work of a mad woman. I just think it's a bad, older lady at doing the socials. You know what I mean?

I mean, it's just like, your mom but trying to be sexy on social media, right? Like, it's literally that. I wanted to say if my mom wanted to do, if like she's looking like that and she wanted to throw around, hell yeah. Like, hell yeah, let's get it up there. Let's see those gutters. Do you still refer to them as cum gutters on all, like on all bodies?

What are they called? What are we talking about? Always forget, I only ever know them as cum gutters. I know that they're not referred to as cum gutters and I don't know what they're called in real life. What are they called now, like slum slutters? Like the V? Oh, I like the V. It's called Why the Last Man.

I don't know, it's Eileen, whatever. You remember that? I guess, but you gave it to us, we believe, and I guess it's like for the list. Yeah. Who's on the list? Jackie, got to have that list. This goes out to it you guys today. 15 extremely questionable celebrity parenting practices.

Oh. Let's see if we match up on any of these. I know why I'd be defensive. We at least know number one that you didn't match up with Sean Penn, which is for the best in many ways. In every way. But also, Sean Penn wanted to name his son after his favorite food, which is steak. And I think that steak pen would be a lot of fun. I think that does, I think.

I can't even say it. I didn't say it aloud. Steak pen is pretty cool. It sounds like a prison. That would have been the best thing that Sean Penn has ever done as a person. Yes. Steak, this is my son, steak. Steak pen.

What would it have been steak though? I wonder if it would have been like filet mignon pen. No. Or New York strip pen. Ooh. Although I would just say prime rib Zabrowski, I think is a perfect name for my child. And I think my favorite dessert. My favorite dessert, Canoli McNally, I think would have been a great name.

I'm just not Italian enough. Save that if there's ever another kid from Canolica. I also feel like I immediately, I felt like. Roundtable Jackie just like spark up her head of like, you don't want to call someone canoli because then everyone's going to want to fill them with their cream. Right, right. But I don't know if not all people would think like that,

but I think that Ryan O'Neill would because Ryan O'Neill hit on his adult daughter on his long-term girlfriend's funeral. We all know that Ryan O'Neill is also, I think that he's also a badman, right? If he does this, yeah. If he doesn't know his daughter enough, to not hit on her at a funeral.

Well, all right. Not only is he hitting on someone at a funeral, which is already big red flag. Although, is that a big red flag? Because I've never been to a funeral and banged at a funeral, but I could imagine a situation in my past where I would have at least tried. Or where maybe you would have met somebody at a funeral and then, like, got their number. I could kind of see it being a romantic story.

And it was his girlfriend's funeral. So I guess that is a little bit. Yes. So it's already your long-term girlfriend's funeral, aka not actually married. and then you cannot recognize your own daughter enough to not come onto her sexually. Yeah, he's bad. I'm gonna go ahead and say he belongs in sex person jail.

I would lock him away, I would throw away, the key, and the key would be shaped like a penis. Yeah, the whole thing would be weird. Put him together in it. And yes, it wasn't, because in my head I'm like, maybe it was like a daughter he wasn't aware of. No, it's Tatum O'Neill. They know, he knows Tatum O'Neill.

But that's fine. We all know about actress Mayambiolic still breastfeeding her son until the age of three and a half. I can't not think about it, especially now as she like slyly tries to bid for the rest of being Alex Trebek and no one necessarily wants to give it to her and I understand. But how would you feel about MJ, you have at least a two-year-old? Cardi B's daughter got her first Birken bag at the tender age of two. How would you feel? Can you imagine looking at Freddie with a Birken bag? Yeah, Cardi and my kids are like the same age.

I always say that I'm in a mom's group with her. I don't want that for my child because my child will lose the bag. And that's why your whole life with children once they're old enough is to just be finding things that they've lost. That's something they don't tell you. Most of your job is a parent is finding very high. stakes very small but incredibly important items like a Lego helmet. And so I don't want, that's why there's no Bergen bag for Freddie. I get it. At least it would be big enough. What was that? Thousands. Oh, every time I hear about these objects I've never heard

of, I look them up and then just do the thing I used to do in high school and I'd walk into an Abercrombie and Finch. I'd just look at the price tag and be like, why would anyone pay? I was literally that guy as a teenager. I would like, I'd be like, do you see his flannel shirt? It's fucking $300. You can get the same thing for like $20 for the old baby. You've been a daddy forever, is what you're saying. I've been a daddy forever. I have two different friends who are sneaker heads who have gotten the kids really

nice sneakers, but they're less, you know, they're like $35 for a pair of Nike, of baby pumas of baby Nike, so it's like not even that big a deal. But like, so babies having nice things, it is cute. Like, I'm incredibly proud of the kid's sneaker collection. Like, it's very nice. Totally. But, again, a bag. The bag is gonna have just a bunch of, like,

toilet paper scraps in it and stuff. Random shit, old food, fruit snacks that have melted into it. You know, it's not worth. Just like my furniture bags. I went through how many, like, bags and umbrellas and, like, whatever when I was a little kid, too. I mean, just, that's the thing you lose it. You lose it.

Yeah. So you're leaving at school. Kids gonna be upset, but it's thousands of dollars. I mean, your kids literally have to get punched so hard by a bully that their shoes fly off of them in order to lose them. Or someone, I don't know. growing up in Queens, people would steal your shoes. So that was also another, that's just a different side of life.

If you come home without shoes on, it's because someone stole your shoes. And that night I'd walk to school. Uphill both ways they'd steal your shoes. Did you ever get your shoes stolen? No, we weren't rich enough to buy nice shoes. But people did, like if their parents bought them, like designer shoes, oftentimes they would get stolen. I'm sorry, I remember now the pictures.

If you don't have the good shoes, you know, like I had to get mad at so many of my students who had made, who, like, it was like a big insult, like, you get your shoes from Payless. And I was like, excuse me, Payless sells perfectly fine shoes. You know, so it's tough. Sneaker culture is very real. For sure. Also, I forgot the picture of you and Henry's little children with those loaf of bread shoes. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Why do you think I want the worst shirt on my feet? I think that if I could just make the bread a little bit meatier, I think. Maybe no one would take it. And I don't know how you guys are going to feel in the future if you're going to feel similarly with Tori Spelling, who co-slept in the bed with her kids, ages 14, 13, 9, 84. No, the co-sleeping thing. We already talked about the co-sleeping thing. We know someone else who didn't get the kid out of the bed until they were, yeah, like 12 or something.

No, no, no, no, no, no. The bed is, I actually now, especially right now, because, you know, when you have a newborn, yeah, some people, people co-sleep, which, but there are risks involved, risks that we're not willing to take. So I do actually, I'm excited to be able to, like, snuggle with my little girl at some point. But that said, like, not on the rag, not on the permanent, and definitely not until they're, oh my God, 14, they're like kissing. Some people lose their virginities that young. You know what I mean?

You know? 14-year-old's coming home high and getting into a parent's bed. Yeah. I just want to a mom. I mean, it happens. Cabernet Sauvignon or is this a pinot? Get out of this bed. I swore.

And yes, I'm drinking wine in bed. Yes, it's delicious. Yes, that's a pastime I enjoy. The mom and the kid are just passing back a nice bottle. Just getting hammered. You know, it happens. Although that sounds kind of nice. If you currently have a bigger kid sleeping in your bed and you didn't plan on or you did,

it's like, you know, like I totally, I never, I was like I will never close sleep because I'm so scared of it. And Zelda was such a bad sleeper that I was like, I will fall asleep in the chair if I don't fall asleep in the bed with her. And so I ended up, I did sleep with her in the bed sometimes. And I did not like it because I was like, I'm not really sleeping. I'm not relaxing. I'm just closing my eye.

But so I get how it happens, and especially with toddlers and trying to get them to stay in their room. Yeah, get them to sleep. You fall asleep. And they get out of once they're not in a crib. You can't control whether they stay in bed. And so there's all that. And then they're going to middle school and high school. And it's like, well, I don't get to see you that much.

Get in the bed. But what's telling? Get back in the bed. It's just like, make a whole room a bed to give everyone their space if you want the togetherness of it. But Tori's spelling is just, that's just do weird. Remember Charlie in the chocolate factory? They're all in the fucking bed.

They're all touching genitals under the air. They must. All right. What are we said? Now we're talking about touching in that room. What is this ballgate? What is even happening right now? What is to hashtag ballgate?

Megan Fox moved to a different part of L.A. because her unborn baby told her to. She said, I feel like you receive messages from the child if you're open to it, and added that the baby told her where it wanted to be raised. Now, the thing is, is that, again, I've never had a child inside of me. I don't understand the connection that one has to a child inside of you.

And I'm also, I'm down with cosmic shit. But also, I don't think I'd listen to the baby be like, yeah, we want a bigger house. Like, yeah, I'm fucking me too. I also want, like, a cloth-foot tub. Get used to it. We're not going to have everything, baby. But if you're Megan Fox, you can be like, you know what, baby, you're right.

We do need a nicer house. Let's get a nicer house. I can't believe she, the same person who's, like, touching tongues with machine gun Kelly had, like, a kid a while back. That's not compete. Honestly. No, yeah, for sure. I didn't realize she was a mom.

Have you seen the skim's? The skims ad that is now being put out. I think it was just released today. the Kim Kardashian line that is Megan Fox and Courtney Kardashian in their underwear just like kind of like kissling and like nuzzling on each other. I was going to immediately

send it to Henry and I was like well I should probably, I didn't want him to be weirded out that I'm sending it to him. Yeah, but yeah those are two parents. Yeah. Wow. That's a big good for them. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. I shouldn't even be looking at this right now. I'm sorry. Stop looking at it. I'm sorry. I'm being

horny. If you're listening to this right now, horny alert. Uh-oh. What are you going to do? But it's probably for the best that this is the time period of which you probably can't see anymore. Oh, I hope you don't lose your sight. Uh-oh.

Yeah, that's right. I'm no longer, it's deflated down there. I just gave him the tea up. I gave him. I'm trying to get you. I did it. I should have been like, I have no idea where you're talking about. So hashtag ballgate.

I just love the part where she was like, I'm going to the White House. The White House was like, she's definitely. not coming here. There's no part of us that want her to be here. We said we would have a phone call with her at most. That's so funny.

Anyways, I think I'm going blind. Items. Oh, we can't see them. All right, here we go. I did these long enough ago. I actually forget what each one was. Let's see.

Hopefully they're good. I think they were, oh, God. Oh, yeah, the last one I'm just excited to talk about is a news story. But the first one, I'm also excited to talk about as a news story, isn't that fucking fascinating? Most celebrity-backed documentaries about their own lives are very boring. Apparently, though, the permanent A-List, illiterate singer is telling everything.

I mean everything, and it should be glorious. Illiterate A-List. She is a performer. My problem is my brain immediately went to the vowel doc, so like I can't not. I'm like, Val Kilmer, it's Val Kilmer, but it's another thing she said. I do need to watch that, though. no, lady who is hot, who had an issue at the Super Bowl. Janet Jackson.

She's part of a big family. Yes. It is a four-hour documentary, five years in the making. I mean, she's had a long career in life. I'm hyped. I'm hyped about this now, especially based on this blind. It's called Janet. It's going to be aired over two nights on Lifetime and A&E.

Jackson said in the trailer, this is my story told by me not through someone else's eyes. And I thought that she had stolen another person's eyes and that she would be telling the story that way, Eileen. No, man, those are Jackson eyes right there.

No, those are Jackson eyes. I'm gonna watch the hell out of this. Me too. I wonder if that means she's gonna dish on Michael, if she's gonna dish on, you know, the whole family, if she's gonna... Yeah, I didn't even think about being Janet Jackson in a post,

like, you know, leaving Neverland World. Right? If she's going to throw J. J.T. Berlake, whatever we call him these days, J-Tah under the bus. J-T. Burlake.

J-T. Berlake. J-T. Burley? You know, I don't know. I just assumed he had a nickname. Does Justin Timberlake not have like a J-Lo or whatever? J-T. J-T.

Oh, okay. J-T. Burlake. I like to change people's ass name so that they're not shorter. But they're different. I like J. Tiberlake, because it sounds like a suit store. That's why I like it.

Come on down to J.Tberlake. We'll get you into a pants. We'll get you into a business occasion very quickly. He's bringing toxy back. You're welcome. Come on. There's more than one dad around here. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Come on. What's going on there? This potential game show host got five. $500,000 and a first look deal to walk away from a certain game show. Was it Mike Richards? Is it my ambiolic? No, but right game show. Mea, with me I am, is that, that's how you say. Michael Richards, Mike Richards? Is it the producer man? The other guy, the bad guy.

No, who was trying to get a job on? Yes. They paid him off? They paid off? Apparently, Levar Burton was paid off to stop pursuing Jeopardy. Burton recently retired his quest to become the next toast to the ballby game show. He says a lot of wish you are stuff about being like, you know, sometimes you try to start doing something and then it just becomes about the competition and you don't realize like you never wanted it in the first place. I mean, he's definitely doing like the good losers club right now kind of thing. But it sounds like maybe at the end of the day he just sort of, but I, you know, I wish I knew more behind the curtain on this. It does, I don't understand why he wasn't given an opportunity.

Was he even allowed to be a guest host? So what I didn't, and I, and I saw people being like, he's actually not killing it. But I didn't see it. Because there has to be a reason. Why? Because it just, it seems like a no-brainer. Like so many people would like love to see him do it. He seems like the bright kind of face for the job essentially. Like because he's had such a history of educational programming. Like, yeah, so he must just not been that good. That's really what it is, is that Alex Trebek did it for such a long time that people are like, I could just stand up there and do what he does.

It's very difficult. It's very difficult. It took, you know, I imagine, it's like, you got to remember, Alex Trebek did it for such a long. long time that to just jump in that I imagine I'm happy at least Lovar Burton got some money to step away from it because that I mean being difficult and also the internet and like our society wanting Lavaar Burton to do it to the point of like we don't even care if he's not that good I remember him doing it people being like well you know he's trying yeah he's jumping into it like he is doing what he can but again it's a very stilted there's no room

Precision. Yeah, there's a precision to that gig and a calm precision too, right? Yeah. That it's got to be difficult. Miaiam? Me I think it's Ma'em. Ma'em. Sorry, Ma'em Bialik has gone on record recently saying, like, I would totally do this permanently.

This is a job I would love to do. She's thirsting for it. She's thirsting for it. I don't know if they want to give it to her. Yeah. But I wonder why. That's another one of those things of like, okay, she really wants it. And there's one of those behind the curtain things of like, we're not going to know.

It's not for us to know. Why won't they give it to her? Is it because she's incredibly controversial about like childhood vaccines? I would hope. But the breastfeeding thing is not even remotely the weirdest thing that she, like honestly till three and a half is not even close to us. I think that's actually not even that weird. I'm sure that we have listeners who've nursed till three and a half. It's like it happens.

But like she, yeah, like I mentioned this a couple of shows ago. She had this thing that was like, well, I don't believe this, but like the movement that I'm in, sometimes people think that if a child needs a C-section and couldn't survive a natural birth, then they weren't meant for the world. Like she's, like, it's bad, bad, bad, bad. She self-identifies as a liberal Zionist. And I, but then I guess my question is, though, then why are they a, allowing her to do some of it.

Yeah, because I was going to say she's doing, she is taking the role as like partial hers right now. The tag team in it. I don't know what the decision makers at Jeopardy are thinking right now. Right? Every decision they're making makes no sense. Let my boy Keith do it.

Keith Whitner won over $100,000 on Jeopardy. He's my boy. We were, he's one of my oldest friends. I've been friends of them since fifth grade. He's very smart and he's very nice. He's a super scientist. He's very, he's always been the smartest dude I know. And he's also, he's very good.

He's kind of got that Stephen Hawking. ability in the sense of he's really good at like asking him complex questions and having him like boil it down to a complete idiot like me, right? He's really good at doing that sort of thing, which is actually harder, I think, than just being a super scientist. Shout out to Keith. But whatever, dude, just like my friends are smart and really good at stuff. What up, Keith? What's up? That's my what's up of the week. And that's a new segment now. What's ups of the week. Yeah, yeah. All right, this is the last one. I'm just saying, I just can't wait to laugh at this whole dumb story and hear MJ's take, especially on this.

It's a shame the network pooled the reality show starring a bunch of ego-driven stars who would then tell people how to be thirsty. It was billed as a show and will still be a documentary about doing good for others and fair wages. It is kind of ironic that the producers made it a non-union project so they could pay less wages and make people work more hours. I see MJ shaking their head. What is this show?

The activist reality show. Yes. The activist. Have you heard of this shit show, Jackie? No. Oh my God, this is the most cynical Hollywood cynical thing ever. It is a CBS show. They've already gotten rid of the show, by the way.

Oh, the Priyanka Chopra. Yeah. A sure Priyanka Chopra. Six activists from around the world. It is a reality competition show with Six Vatis for Out of the World. Competing in Missions, Media Stunts, Digital Campaigns, and Community Events to win the name, to win in the name of whatever cause they're fighting for. the show is immediately criticized

for being tone deaf and performative and promoting pseudo-activism over real activism. The show is no longer a competition and more a docu-series that no one will watch showcasing the different activists and their passionate fight for their causes. Whatever!

Did you not roll your eyes so hard out the back of your head, MJ, when you learned about this? I mean, listen, charity is cool. It's just not activists, The word activist means something, and that's not what it means, right? Like, I feel like, if you're like, let's do a thing where it's a charity competition, call it whatever.

Like, but I just feel like to kind of... Making a competition out of like people's passions to make the world a better place just seems misguided. It's like a good instinct to be like, people care about things. But I also, yeah, I think it's very cynical to be like, oh, there's like an aesthetic of like activists like occupy Wall Street and like the Kendall Jenner give the Pepsi give the cops of Pepsi ad you know it's just you know there's just so much like I feel like there's this thing where it's like oh activism is so sexy and it's like yeah it's just like listen activists are like repressed by like the

there's usually like organized state violence against them like it's just not that sexy you know it's like there's not be wrong there's many sexy activists but it's just that oh yeah that part particular show was very cynical. And like, yeah, raising money for causes is great. I love that Lil Nas X has a charity associated with every single track on his album, for example. But I wouldn't even call that activism. I would call it, like, really good mobilization of charity work, right? Like, activism just means something and it means something more direct than being like, I'm famous and naming a charity on television, you know. Yeah, it's so funny. Oh, and it's the co-the co-produces global citizen, the same people that put on the huge,

quote-unquote activist shows that people perform. Remember that like Olivia Wilde hosted years ago? Remember when they were doing the Global Citizen stuff? That makes a lot of sense. Oh, right. I went to one of these, these like free concerts. Yeah, but they're like mixed in with Live Nation, which we all know is like the huge, like it loses a lot when it is in conjunction

with big corporations that are just. going to stomp all over it and make essentially a mockery out of what they were and originally intending to do in the first place. Right. Yes, there's a lot of capitalism fueling this activism, which is just... Capitalist activism, that's where we're at. I can definitely see again in those lascivious photos of Megan Fox are no longer in front of my face.

They shouldn't be. I'm good to go. Yeah, absolutely. Thank you so much for enjoying yet another blind eye. And another episode of page seven. Oh, and but first we have to do our shout, shout, let it all out. These are the emails that you wrote in about. Come out.

We'll read it out to you. Abby, baby, you ain't late. You're just in time. Abby came here to wish her other bestie have, Megan, a happy birthday. And again, I now have the saddest friendship slash not friends. friendship song stuck in my head. Don't you remember the reason you love? Now it's going to be in my head, but I also want to say now I will immediately put it hand in

hand with both Abby and Megan, the best friendship that has ever existed. Abby says, I want to wish Megan the happiest 29th birthday in the world. I love and I miss you with my whole heart. You're the most supportive caring, no bullshit friend, and I could not be more grateful for our friendship. I hope you have the best birthday yet. and I do too. Oh, Dave!

Dave has to miss the B-Day vacay and still wants to send B-Day love to his friend. My lovely friend, Misty B, is celebrating a birthday on September 23rd. Double-20thirds, double-twentthirds! I can't say enough about what a fighter she is. When life hands her lemons, she never sours. And you can bet she'll turn them into a lemon pound cake and lemon curd. We worked together, baked together, and bonded over LPN shows together. We came for last podcast, but we certainly stayed for page seven.

I hope you'll join me in wishing her equal parts of wisdom, love, and magic on her birthday. And I hope she'll accept this shout-out as a recompense for Dave, aka My Sorry Ass, Missing Her Birthday, Vacation Extravaganza. Well, I hope you have a great time, Missy on your birthday. And I hope that Dave's missing is not going. going to be keeping you having a frown. Yep, that's how I said it. But our Twitch community's own demon whiskey next birthday is on September 29th. And I'm so happy you've become a part of our beautiful community.

I'm sure that we will celebrate together. And I really appreciate all of your kind words. You said, I'm absolutely so extremely proud to be a fan of this insane thing y'all have made from so little. And on the backs of your own totally insane notions. and ideas of what comedy and broadcasting could be. You are such a wonderful part of our community, David Whiskey, Nick. Thank you so much for the kind words that you have passed on to us,

an endless love to you right fucking back at you, and happy almost birthday, I can't wait, to celebrate on Twitch. We love you, David Whiskey, Nick. Speaking of our Twitch community, Shebe Wu wrote in a shout-out to send love to their bestie Nicky! I'm writing in hopes you, You can include my talented most lovely best friend Nikki, aka I Carly, aka Skash in a shoutout.

She has been my person for over 15 years. Our bond is so special and unique, even though we look nothing alike, people always ask if we're sisters. She's my star sister, baby. She's an amazing stylist who works her ass off to make the whole world beautiful. Not only is she a hairstylist, fashion designer, makeup artist, and a truly a really a very queen. She also makes the cutest accessories and jewelry for her Etsy shop. I meant it when I said she works her ass off. Please check out her Etsy shop. That is Nikki K-D-E-Digns. N-I-K-K-I-K-Y

designs. All one word. She is such a gem. I just can't sing her praises enough. You'll always be my woodland creature and I, your slimy lake snake. I love you, Nikki. That's adorable. Love Shelby. Thank you so much. for writing in and again being a part of our beautiful Twitch community. I love you guys so much. And, oh my God, I love your love. Can I just say that before I get into this beautiful anniversary shoutout, that Zane wrote in about his love for Margo,

and aren't Zane and Margo just like the sickest couple combo name ever? Of course you've made it 20 years! Zane says, I want to send a shout out to Margo, the greatest wifey I've ever had. First and only wife, but still, we're celebrating our 10th anniversary on September 20th, and I think that we are the strongest and happiest we have ever been. That's saying a lot after the dumpster fire we've all gone through the last couple of years.

Not only are we celebrating 10 years of marriage, but a relationship that has survived since we were in high school 20 years. You're not getting old, Zane, you're just getting better with age. We've experienced hard times and separation, but it only made our connection stronger. Margot, you are an amazing wife, daughter, and mom. After all these years, I still love you like a raccoon loves a garbage cake. Looking forward to forever with you.

Oh, St. Margo, I love your love. And speaking of sick-ass names, it's Catharie's 26th birthday. And hell yes, not only happy birthday, coming out from your partner of 10 years, Jerry, which congrats on that because that ain't no easy feat, but also congrats on your new baker job. Oh, as someone that worked at a bakery for eight years, I know it ain't easy, but damn, if the burns all over your hands and arms don't make you stronger. and the look on someone's face when they say, oh my God, you made this?

Oh, it's like none other. Congrats to you and happy birthday, Catherine. Also, Jen, I love you too and thank you so much for the kind words. And Jen is spreading some Virgo Queen love to her bestie Kayla. Jen says, I want to wish a happy 20th birthday to my best friend Kayla, my fellow Libra Queen. She is the single most thoughtful and giving human I've ever met. and is my angel on this planet has quite literally saved my life when I was at my lowest point. And I can never thank her enough for being by my side through it all.

I'm so proud of her for stepping out of her comfort zone on her self-love journey and for absolutely killing it with her recent promotion. From all of our Twilight marathons and Habachi dates, I wouldn't trade an ounce of it. I ain't never got to stop loving you, bitch. Love this line, all in caps. I need you to know that. And also, a dors on,

adorbs on adorbs. Taylor, just got to throw it out there that hell, yes, I love a first date anniversary. Shout out. Plus, y'all's first date

sounds like a damn New York treasure in a New York minute. Ooh, I can give you a handy in a New York minute. Anyway, Taylor says,

I just want to give a shout out to my amazing and supportive partner, Tyler, for the anniversary of our first date. We've come so far from a handjob in Prospect Park. I love you dearly and can't wait to share more special days with you.

Love it Taylor, Taylor and Tyler Handies in Prospect Park. I am here for it. I hope you guys have a wonderful future together. And oh my God, wonderful Lainey, thank you so much for writing in. I can't imagine being thrust in front of a classroom full of kindergartners after only ever having taught virtually through pandemic. Lainey says last week was my first full week of school. It is safe to say that it may have been the hardest week of my life,

but I made it through and stayed smiling thanks to page seven. On Friday morning, as I was dragging myself to work, I listened to this podcast in the car. Listening to y'all chat just warmed my heart, made me laugh out loud and smile again. Also hearing Holden talk about having a newborn made me feel a bit of suffering camaraderie with him. And they say, I know it's not the same.

But whatever, I just want to let y'all know how much you bring to this world, and I wanted to give myself some props for having this strength and grit to keep teaching, even when it feels hard. I am proud of you, killing it, Lainey. And also, oh, no, Chris from Joliel, I'm sorry that we thrust Riverdale into your life via your amazing girlfriend, India, but also sorry, not sorry. We are here to celebrate India's 31st birthday next week. Lord knows maybe Riverdale will give us all a gift of more Mothmen next week.

I'm hoping, and if it is, it goes out to you, India. Love you, have the best 31st, and it only gets better every year into your 30s, I swear, just better and better and better beyond. Oh, it's another love shout out from Bryant to Ashley. He says, I just wanted to give her a shout out for being the funniest, most badass partner I could ever imagine. I want to thank her for being patient with me and my journey through recovery from alcoholism. She's stuck by my side through all my ups and downs, and I hope she feels that the support is reciprocated. I love her so very much, and I can't hardly wait to add a little human being to our pack of chickens, dogs, cats, and fish.

I am so thankful for her strength and resiliency. We're the best team ever. Also, small shout out to our dogs of Vincent and Luigi, our cats, Lando and Charlie, and the rooster who runs our chicken coop, named Cake Boss. I love you, Ashley, and here's a cheer. of non-alcoholic beer for all the fucking great years to come. Thanks so much. And also, Brian, if you haven't tried hairless dog, I and my sober partner, highly recommend it.

It is delicious N.A. beer. He thinks that tastes the best of all the N.A. beers he's tried. But anyway, Morgan, Morgan, Morgan, my heart is over, joyed to send birthday love to your own baby boy. I'm sorry, not baby boy. Full-grown, big, scary man,

Sam, who is turning 18 on September. 29th. Morgan says, Sam was born while I was in college, so I feel like we've grown up together in a way. He's gone for being my fat little dumpling to a grown-ass dude in what feels like a blink of the eye, and I could not be more proud of him. From his near perfect SAT scores to his work-teaching kids, Taekwondo, to the way he always knows when I'm stressed out and picks that time to send me a really stupid joke about balls. He's an amazing kid, and I love him, and I like him. Watching him turn into the man he has has been one of the greatest joys of my life, and I will always be his number one fan. We share a love of LPN shows, and I hope we're still texting about them next year when he's

a far away at college. Oh my God, my heart's going to explode. Also, Sam, I know nothing about you, but you sound a lot like Lloyd Dobler, and if you haven't seen Say Anything, and if you haven't seen say anything, and you want to learn about a character that so many have Thursted Four and his care and consent in dating another young, please watch it, say anything. And I just wanted to say, Thank you guys so much for writing in your shoutouts. I can't say thank you enough. And if you want to give a shout out to somebody else whom you love or just want to send some support to, hit us up at page 7 podcast at gmail.com with any kind of shout out you want or if you just want to say hi or you want to just send something that you thought would make us smile because I read it all and it all does. I love you guys so much.

And thank you again for sending in your shout outs. Thank you shout-outs. Thank you, shout-outs. Thank you guys so much for writing in. I love reading everything that you guys sent in. Holden uses the conspiracy theories. I love all of the memis that you sent. I love the vids that you send.

And I love the love that you share. Thank you guys so much for joining us on this very tired edition of page seven. I'm not tired. I'm just hot. And I'm physically. My name is Jackie's a president. You can follow me on Instagram at Jack That Worm and come hang out on Tuesdays and Thursdays over on

Twitch.tv.tv. forward slash, oh, no, it's Jackie, for sex and for fashion. Check me out, Twitch.tv. forward slash Holdenators Ho for parties and games. Yay. And party games. We'll play a fun party game, but we'll find a relative of yours and we'll put them in a trunk and we'll drive them somewhere and let them go and they'll not know

how to get home. Doesn't that sound like a fun game, Jackie? This week's your aunt Jimla. That's fine. I don't give an H about her. You don't give a Henry about Jimla?

Yeah, Henry. Get on that giblog. Patreon.com forward slash page seven of a podcast. Check it out. It's so good. It'll make you happy. It'll make you filled with wood. Holdenader's so on Twitch.

Holdenaders so on everything, dude. Holdenaders taken over your world. You might have a Holdenator in your basement right now. Check it out. MJ. Wow. I'm MJ. And I'm MJK.

on Instagram. And I hope you don't have a holdinator in your basement because that would be very upset. We love you guys and we'll be back next week. Bye, everybody. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors, you can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.