Page 7 - Ep. 443: But A Man Was Slapped

Episode Date: March 31, 2022

This week we're gossin' (at length) 'bout the SLAP and ALL the discourse surrounding it, Oscar fashion, the incoherent Oscar Fan Favorite selections, and more Oscars weirdness. Meanwhile, celeb conspiracy corner; Kid Rock's Body Double!?  A bizarrely deadly list! The Blindz and SHOUTZ!! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

You're the way you are When we're driving in your car And you're talking to me one on one But you become watching your back Like you can't relax You try to be cool You look like a fool I didn't write this beforehand

I didn't write it beforehand It was all Was it a bit of an improvisation But don't get on my stage And slap me in the face Yes we are here To talk about the awesome And man, we had to like pause our conversation.

Just we just like desperately talked for 35 minutes. We just stop. We have to record what we're saying. Yeah. Yeah. We have all been on a journey each and every one of us from Sunday night to Wednesday night is record. Thursday as you hear.

And you know, I actually think I've learned a lot. And we've all thought through this a lot, like a lot. And there is a lot to say. It's been great. I'm really looking forward to this conversation, but it is like, at first, Holden was like, I can't believe something happened that we can really talk about on page seven. And then I went from that to immediately being like,

this is too much. This is too much for us. I've never seen, I've seen Twitter on fire before. I've never seen it so on fire. At first, it's like really exciting. Like, wow, everyone's talking about the same thing. This is like amazing. It's so exciting and crazy.

But it kind of feels like when you decide to, on a Saturday night, go out and get like the worst. fast food dinner and a bunch of ice cream and watch a bunch of like really bad like movies. You know what I mean? And at the end of the whole thing was kind of like how I felt after one full day of being obsessed with my dinner feet. I'm just sitting there like, oh, no, I just feel bad. You know what I mean?

Like I'm just like. So I just feel bloated with takes. Oh, the takes. Oh, God, the many, many takes. And how many people think that. They are just the brightest, funniest person for their take. Oh my God. You were so funny, by the way, with your,

he got in one little fight at the Oscars. Did you remember from Fresh Prince of the film? Wow. Do you remember it? Brilliant. I cannot believe. If you made that joke within the first two hours, it's all good. If you were still making it by like Tuesday, it's time to stop.

Too much. Thank you for sharing that. Everybody hates Chris meme. I just, I'm blown away by how creative it is. Come on now. I don't know. I was just. I was just.

So, yeah. It's takes and jokes and juror of it. Yes. Right. Well, and that's the thing with something like this, there's a race for the takes and there's a race for the jokes. And at first, it is thrilling. I haven't, you know, I don't know if anyone else woke up the night that Trump got COVID.

But that was, yes. That was the most fun I've ever had on Twitter. I was just, I was, it was two in the morning. And Gideon had been awake and he came to bed and he woke me up and he said, Trump has it. And I just. was, I was like the Katie Perry song, I was like, I'm wide awake.

And I stayed up for the next like two to three hours. Desperately hoping he was going to die. He was like waiting, watching the news. What is he going to die? Dude, on Monday, I didn't do the wordal until like 7 p.m. Oh my God. Like that's how. I know.

I was like, that's how. I was like, oh my God, I forgot to do the wordle. You're still doing the wordle? Are people still doing the wordle? Some people are just, it's a part of my like, It's a part of my practice. It's like every morning I get up. You know, do the make breakfast.

I sit with Winnie and stare at my phone instead of, you know, paying attention to my baby and I do the wordle. Oh, yeah. And I talk to her about the wordal though. I'm like, oh, it's a weird one today. There's a why in this one, you know what I mean? Oh yeah. Did Winnie have anything to say about the slap?

What is Winnie thing? Oh my God. She was there. Well, that was the weird thing. I mean, let's walk through it, okay? Because this is a really interesting thing. We all actually happen to be for one of the, it's very rare this happens.

You would think we would do this. this a lot more since we do this podcast, but it is rare that we were all on a text chain, the three of us, writing each other about, texting each other about the Oscars. And we, because we all happen to just be actually watching it at the same time this year. This is a rarity for us. And I actually, I used to always watch stuff live, but now I don't have cable. I have finally transitioned to the streaming life. And I was like, oh my God, how am I going to, I have to sign up for an app, which reminds me I need to cancel the app.

but I was like, I'm going to have to... You've got to make an alert for yourself. I know. I always say you got to do that. And then I never do that. I'm going to forget. But I was like, you know, these things are always sad and depressing and boring.

And I know I have to talk about it on page seven, but I can just like watch the recap. And I almost... And it was already 830 and I already started. I like missed the opener because of getting the kids to bed. And I was like, you know, maybe I'll just watch the recap and I'll get the highlights. And like, that's all I'll need.

But then I ultimately was like, you know, I always watch the Oscars. Let me sign up to allegedly pay the 70 bucks a month for Hulu Live TV and then I'll cancel it. And I did the same. I also have overpriced Hulu TV and I keep forgetting to cancel it. I literally only have it to watch like Ann Oscar once every three months. You need it. So bad.

So we were all watching it and we were all watching it together and commenting. I don't even remember what we were texting about before. But we were like, oh, that Coda speech was nice. you know, like we were just... Oh God, but how sad that Coda speech was when, oh my God, and he found out that his father got into the car accident and he's deaf and he's paralyzed from the neck down

so he could never speak to his father ever again. One of the many moments that were absolutely overshadowed. Overshadow. To the point where Jackie sends us articles about other things that happened in the Oscars and literally in every single article at some point they could not help themselves. They had to mention the fucking slap.

Just to nail the fucking drive it home how much that overshadowed anything for anyone else that night, which is one of I, again, the really frustrating things about that moment. That's one of my biggest grievances is the upstaging element of it. Especially Questlove. That documentary is fantastic, by the way. Check it out. You know, I haven't seen Kota, but from what I have read, like, it seems to be like something where, like, it is like a pretty. thoughtful portrayal of like of deaf culture that isn't that isn't like hearing centered that is actually like deaf centered and to have like you know sign language uh you know interpreters on

stage and to have somebody give an acceptance speech all in sign language like was really really wonderful and I think like really valuable and really beautiful and like there was a lot of other meaningful things that could have been centered on Sunday night that were in a lot of awkward bad comedy moments yeah all the other stuff that usually happens at the Oscars, like Kristen Stewart wearing shorts. Or the, yeah, the weird. Oh my mom was so upset that Kristen Stewart was wearing shorts. How, she goes, doesn't she know it's the Oscars?

No, she shows up in her short pants. My favorite is, they always have to go after Florida. It's like, yeah, they do. My mom's running commentary from the Oscars was great. I actually, I love my, because my mom watches all award ceremony. She watches E-Newss, live every night. She watches excess Hollywood, so she at times

knows more about celebrity gossip than I do. Yeah, you gotta get in on that knowledge. It's great. I love getting my mom's feedback, but it was very funny. Chris's Stuart wearing shorts. She's nominated for an Oscar. She was on the worst dress list that you sent us and I want to have a bone to pick with that. I put the shirt great!

She looked hot! If you got the legs to wear those shorts, wear the shorts. With the heels? She was like, mama me! Yes, please. Yeah, especially if you thought Timothy Shalames was best. Can we just real quick, just real quick talking about Timothy? Because I thought it was so funny when Ed Larson saw that Timothy did have a shirt, he goes, does he not have a shirt on?

And it was so, oh, it was so upset. And I made a joke to Henry that I was like, oh, it's not very Paul Atreides of him. And Henry's like, actually, it's very Paul Atreides. And I said, does what does it, Kisak, Hatterack mean, oops, I lost my. shirt in spice language. And he said, he needs to be covered in the deep set or he will have a fatal loss of moisture. And that's where he lost me.

So that's the end of my Dune commentary with my brother. Did you slap him at that point? No, he was so upset because he was on a plane. And he's like, the one fucking time I don't watch the Oscars. I know, right? For so many people and so many people like sat this one out, at least up until that point. Because apparently it did get a huge ratings boost for better for worse. I think we might see some more incidences.

I mean, I guess let's just go ahead and say it. Anything that resorts to violence, you are immediately in the wrong. No matter what it is, no matter how it happens, that if you start the violence, you are wrong. And I know that there are, I'm sure, caveats to this that you can definitely tell me. But in this instance, no matter what. At the Oscars, like, he brought it to violence. He brought words to violence, and that sickens me. It made me immediately not.

The second I figured out that it was real, I couldn't explain my nausea and thank God I have a therapist. She's like, that is, you were triggered because of domestic assault that you've experienced in the past. I was like, whoa. And I was like, but it was on the Oscars. She's like, no, that nausea was you realizing that someone that is on a stage that you do deem in a safe environment was assaulted and you watched it happen. And that you are going, having nausea is completely understandable and valid response to watching something like that happened. Right, right. And it made me upset, like even the rest, you could see everyone in the Oscars.

Shaken, yeah. It was shaken for the rest of the Oscars. And every, and again, and so there's this whole debate on Twitter and everything. And I also just want to say, you know, I told you guys about this. I wanted to state it early on. the one, the tweet I agreed with, or really connected with the most, during the fallout on Twitter was the picture of the dress.

If everyone remembers the dress on social media, where you either knew it was blue or you knew for a fact it was gold, and everybody went back and forth about it, freaking out, like, how could you think it's blue? And I was like, and they were like, this is Twitter today. And I was like, absolutely.

And everybody's bringing their own personal perspective to it. Which is all you can bring to a conversation. And as someone that has had experience with assault, I bring that perspective. There's a lot of perspectives that we can't know and that we cannot speak to. And there's value. This is that, like, I actually, my initial reaction, as the three of us were texting, was like, absolute. I was absolutely shocked.

I was absolutely horrified. I was like, but also along with that, I still, I think simultaneously had the kind of like, LOL famous people. Like, you know, this is crazy. Oh, yeah. I actually didn't get angry until the acceptance, until he won an award. Yeah, like he wasn't asked to leave. And I think we all talked about this beforehand.

We're all in agreement that like he didn't need to necessarily be dragged away in handcuffs. No, but I do think he should have been removed from the event. I think he should have been removed from the event. And I definitely don't think he should have received a standing ovation for winning the award and then allowed to get up on stage. and like do this whole play this whole victim card slash like God is at once me to hurt hit people. I do crazy things for love which I do think is a really fucked up thing

to hear if you're a domestic assault survivor like you know I mean it was just so many things I was like this is so wrong this is being handled so poorly and the best too is on Twitter after the Academy being like we do not convone don't violence it's like dude, say all you want, your actions to be glad of the words, and you just let this thing happen. At this same time, I'm already seeing reports coming up being like, apparently Jackie, you said you read something, they did ask him to leave, and he just didn't. The Academy apparently asked him to leave, and he said no.

That is, I will say, at the time of recording, that is what has come out. I don't know anything more from that. Yeah. But I did just read that article saying that he was asked to leave and he said no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so that kind of adds another layer of like, oh, shit, so they actually. actually did try to remove him. But, you know, what do you do?

It's a live event. They're still trying to maintain some sort of formality. And, like, not chaos. And he was not bringing charges against Will Smith. And every person that, like, now all of these accounts are coming out, which, of course, immediately on Twitter, you could see the uncensored versions from other countries, but that you can see Chris Rock immediately trying to keep the peace. Even afterwards, he didn't go after him.

He did not push it. he tried immediately to keep the peace and to keep it under control. Right. And then you have Anthony Hopkins coming on after Will Smith's. I love that moment. After Will Smith's accepted speech and he's just like, yes, peace. Happiness. And that's what we're making here.

And Chris Rock is obviously a seasoned performer. I knew immediately that it was not staged because Chris Rock is a seasoned performer, obviously. And he was so rattled. To me, that was actually the most upsetting. part. I was like, he's really upset. And there is some, I have some personalization going on there because Chris Rock was like the first standup I ever fell in love with. I like, it's hard for me to, I can't give up on Chris Rock, even though I think that he has done a lot, a lot of his jokes,

even from back then and more recently, are worthy of like, you know, of criticism and whatever. but I was having like a real like I'm upset to see Chris Rock this upset I feel like it isn't and yeah So it's also it's also the Again the going back to the dress thing We all did comedy on stages In many spots in New York

For many many years So another thing that we're coming to it with Our perspective is from the comedian's perspective And so I had a guttural reaction I've never been a victim of domestic assault But I had a guttural reaction to a comedian saying a joke on stage, saying words, and having someone just walk up on the stage and get smacked. And then not get removed and actually get applauded.

But also on top of that. That's fucking crazy to me as a comedian. All of the pictures of Will Smith partying afterwards at the vanity fair party. Oh, exactly. Oh, he's so sorry. He's rapping along to getting jiggy with it. And everybody's surrounding and dancing. Fuck that.

You ruined the night of, you not only triggered so much. many people. You've ruined the night of so many people that worked so hard to get there. And nobody's talking about Coda. Nobody's talking about it. He upstage everybody. And I think perhaps most important. You should have gone home afterwards at least. You should have at least gone home. I play. He upstaged Questlove. He upstaged Coda. He upstage, I think, perhaps most importantly, the William sisters, right? Because no one was thinking about them during his acceptance speech, right? No one, suddenly like this whole. whole pallor was cast over to,

I think that's what Jim Carrey said, which I don't, I agree with some parts of Jim Carrey's thing. I completely, just any time you're calling for the police to come in, it's odd as a big no for me, yeah, for arrest. He was like, he should have arrested. He should have at least been removed. And I don't necessarily agree with that,

but most everything else, Jim Carrey said about ruining that moment for so many people. He should have stepped out. There should have been some sort of, so, but also, I feel like important in this conversation, right, is, and we are talking about our perspectives, the perspectives that are informing us, and there's inherently,

we are three white people. There are going to be perspectives that we do not even know we are missing or that we are seeing and not understanding. And so I think it's just really important to like say that, that every person is coming to this experience with a reaction. And I had my initial reaction. I spoke to some close friends who felt really differently than I did. And my, my ultimate take is still, I'm still not in the pro will camp. I think I understand. the pro will camp or the will defense camp a little bit better. I call it the talk shit get hit camp. Yeah.

That there is that they're, you know, that perhaps. Family and that, you know, and that it was a attack. Or defending a loved one with a disability or a. Right. That you feel like, you know, that your family has been insulted, that this is, that this has, you know, happened before. Although it's not like Chris Rock has made fun of, you know, Jada Pinkett-Smith's Elopecia before.

He had a joke that targeted her at the Oscars in 2016, but that was a completely fair joke. He said, you know, you can't target, you can't boycott something you have been invited to, which, whatever, you might not like the joke, but that's fair. It's not like a cruel, that's not targeting any,

that's not like a structurally unfair joke. That's a fine, totally fair game. And I think pretty funny joke. And in case you're not aware, also, Chris Rock has said that the joke was not written before. It was an improvved joke about G.I.J. And if you're not quite familiar with exactly what he said, he said, can't wait to see Jada Pinkett Smith in G.I. Jane 2 because of her hairstyle.

He claims that he also did not know that she has alopecia. She outwardly speaks towards having alopecia. I watch the Red Table Talks. I know this. I know that her, that Willow also ended up shaving her head in solidarity and that there was a moment between. and I'm pretty sure if I remember correctly, her mother did as well. But it's been a part of the conversation.

So a lot of people online there are saying, how dare he not know that? Right. Which I cannot speak for Chris Rock, but to make, like, what a nightmare. I will say, I can speak for myself. I didn't know that. It's pretty easy not to know everything about everything.

It is, right? And we're a pop culture podcast where we've talked about Red Table Talks several times. I never knew that. I definitely thought, personally, that was a fashion choice she was made. But she looks hot as shit. Yeah, because she was really good.

She looks incredible. But also, the flip side of that, right, is that Chris Rock, I think a lot of people are saying he especially should have known better, right? Because he made a documentary called Good Hair about black women's hair, about how scrutinized it is. And in the documentary, it features somebody with alopecia. But again, if he didn't know, then he didn't know he was making a joke at her at the expense of something that's more serious than just how you look, but is actually an autoimmune disease that people, that can be really painful for people. And obviously there's this whole element of like the scrutiny of, you know, of black women's hair, the intersections of racism and misogyny about black women in general, about their hair specifically. So that, again, is an important element to this that the three of us are not going to speak on because it is not something that we have the perspective or authority to speak on. But it is part of, I think, some of the strong reactions that people were having.

Very much so acknowledged to. Why did Chris Rock do this? He should have known better. and I just think that that's worth, you know, pointing out. Well, and that was my whole, like, struggle when, you know, because I was saying before, like, that's kind of the interesting thing with social media in general and especially Twitter is, like, something happens like this that a lot of people see it once.

And in my head, I'm like, oh, everyone's going to feel this way about it. For sure, right? It's super not okay to, like, walk up on stage and hit somebody. You know what I mean? Like, that's crazy. And then, you know, and then apply, like, and then it's so fucked up that he got to go up and win an award and like have this moment after doing that and everything. And then you go on Twitter, you're like, oh, you know what I mean?

And it's crazy. And literally for every single person that was like, that's not okay, you should never do that. There was always someone right underneath that comment saying if you ever, like Will was in the right, if anyone had done that to like my wife or whatever. Said that it was like a show of love and, you know, a black man standing, black man standing up for his wife. that was meaningful to her because she hadn't seen that. You know, Lekeith Stanfield's comment on the red carpet was, like, amazing because he was just like, I mean, shit like this happens all the time in other spaces, but not here, you know, which I think is really, like, comes.

That's, that's the, that's the thing that if, and again, I think part of the, like, you know, people who are defending Will or who understood Will's actions are like, there is, there are spaces where the socially sanctioned code for somebody wrong and social. your family is to slap them. And if, and that's, and that's, that's true. And, but, but it's not in this space, right? It's not in a performance. It's certainly not at the Oscars. And, you know.

And I think it's incredible, I'll at least say it's incredibly debatable, whether or not that joke specifically actually warranted physical violence. Right. You know, if we're going to have the first comedian, first stand-up comedian ever slapped on stage. I don't public forum. And it wouldn't, My choice wouldn't have been Chris Rock. I said it himself.

He was like, it was a GIG joke. Yeah. My choice wouldn't have been Chris Rock. It wouldn't have been for that joke. But there's, I mean, we just spent the last 10 years having a debate about whether or not jokes matter. Right. So that's the fascinating thing to me about this. Obviously, jokes do matter.

And that's why it's important to have conversations about how jokes should target, how, what targets should be like. And whether, and I think if you're going to say that joke was ablest, I think that's totally fair. even if Chris Rock didn't know it was ablest, if it caused harm in that way, and that's totally fine, right, to discuss and to talk about. But yeah, we are now in a world where a extremely wealthy, high-profile celebrity broke the fourth wall to walk onto a stage and slap a comedian for a joke they made. And that is a new world we were not exactly in before. They got applauded and therefore slightly. made more normal the concept of like it's maybe it's okay to um if you don't agree with something a comic

saying on stage to go up and and and turn it into a physical altercation yeah i don't i don't know i want to hear what i don't think it necessarily i don't think it's a slippery slope like everyone's going to be slap at every comedian i think the comics out there being like i'm afraid now you know to like that's not and i think all the all the apatow style tweets out there apatow you know he could have killed him. And in fact, they really ruin it for a lot of the real conversation here about how that was a not okay thing to do. Because that obviously is ridiculous and completely overblown. And like, we're not that fucking fragile. It was just a slap. Like, I'm not going to sit here and be like, he could have murdered him. Like, just in that sense. But it was a fucking slap. Yeah. And it was completely fucked up. And even Will Smith, I think you can tell in his acceptance speech, while he's fumbling through all every, literally every line.

a domestic assault perpetrator would say to someone after having done, I did it for love. God is asking me to like, that was the, that was the cult version, God's asking me to fucking hit somebody in this moment. You know, this, that, and the other, I mean, I just think that that is all like completely disgusting and like completely, you know, and totally more the pinpoint on what's fucked up. And I want to just say, I think a ton of people out there,

especially being like Team Will, watched the joke and the, slap and did not watch the rest and only heard about it after because who the fuck was watching the Oscars in 2022 anyways. I mean, we've been talking about how much people hate celebrities these days and think that these sorts of things are just big, like, gross, you know, celebratory events of like shitheads and whatever if you think that's fine. But regardless, I think a lot of people didn't see all that shit and see the people in the audience and the vibe of the rest of that show. And like, so they're all just like, yeah, talk shit, get hit. Fuck it.

You know? Or it's hilarious. It's just two stupid celebrities like doing this thing. And it's like, I, you know, and I totally get, I guess just blow it off and think it's just a funny, dumb thing. But like, there was some real interesting fucking crazy shit going on that does deserve some discourse, especially, you know, for us in a pop culture podcast. Because it's just so funny because I don't want to sit here and just be like,

I'm afraid to step upon the stage. You know what I mean? It's like, no, I'll fucking get on the stage. But you know what? Do you want to walk up on the stage? I'm a fucking go. We'll go. You want to go?

My friend Michael was like, Chris's whole act. You want to come up and try to start shit fucking, I'm just saying words on a stage and you want to come up here? All right, unless I'm fucking talking about how great mind comp is. I think I think I have a right to defend myself.

And I will not just try to keep the piece. You know what I mean? It's crazy. My friend Michael was like, Chris's whole, like, thing is about how much he was beat up as a kid. Like, he should have run when he saw the look in Wilson's eyes. And I can't stop laughing about that because, like, imagine how weirdly escalatory it would have been if he ran. Like, if Wilson walked up on stage of Chris Rock just turned around and ran, how funny would that have been. Everybody definitely would have thought that was a, well, everybody did kind of think it was a bit.

You know what I mean? Yeah, everyone definitely would have just thought it was a bit. But if Chris Rock was like, he's going to hit me. Definitely if he ran off the stage, you'd be like, wow, what a funny bit. That would have been so... I mean, he was so shocked. And that's the crazy. By the way, if you were at all of the camp that it was staged and it was fake, you are out of your mind.

It was all for ratings. And you know what? I will say at first, I thought it was for ratings. For like half a second. Right. Until I saw how Chris Rock reacted afterwards. I think that was also part of your survival technique. I think that's a lot of people's.

Hey, when I was robbed at gunpoint, not to, like, compare to a much more crazy thing, I thought the whole thing was fake. I was just like, this can't be real. This must be, that's a toy gun. This isn't real. You know what I mean? I mean, I think that's part of just being like,

because it's, yeah, I think if you've ever been on stage and had, like, a really fucked up crazy encounter with a random person in the audience in your life, you brought it up the other day when you were talking about the guy that came on stage when I was doing a monologue and what had he done right before he, he like stopped our whole set

was that he was trying to rip my bra off when I was on stage in a bra and underwear doing a mom. Right, right. And like, so it's like there's also that that comes in. You were probably triggered from that too. Oh, for sure. Yeah.

Yeah, just from all of doing comedy in New York and dealing with crazy shit. But also, if you watch Red Table Talks, if there's one person that knows how to, with words, talk about how they feel and to suss through their, their actions in the past and their actions of present. It's Jada fucking Pinkett Smith.

That's the thing. And this is why I was like... Let her fucking take care of it. You don't need to fucking do that shit. Yes. I so agree with this, Jackie. And I was really struggling with the like, you know, you should defend your, your loved ones.

Which I, of course, like if someone's, you know, if, you know, I think that it is completely understandable that people identified with like, the people, you know, like, what typically. Anthony Haddish said are the people who identified with like, I, you know, one of my friends, you know, whose partner has a disability was like if somebody tried to humiliate my partner in front of a huge audience, like I would also want to hit them, you know? So like I understand that perspective too. You would want to, but would you do it? Right. Right. There is also the difference of like, yes, I think anyone in Will Smith's situation of like, man, I should have just hit him. How many times have you said that about a situation? But what stops you from? doing it. Yes. And I know that we are obviously

condoning violence here. I also think, again, in the, like, one of my friends was like, he could have hit him at an after party, you know? Like something, something not on stage. Or talk to him,

or talk to him would be better. Or even if he really wanted to, it still would have caused a big scene, just said the thing he said from his seat. Yeah, yelled at him. And the comfort of his seat after he fucking walked on. Which would have been inappropriate.

Yes. Or I used his accept. He didn't know he was going to win, but you could use your acceptance speech to be like, you know, whatever. But, but Jackie, what you said is, I think, the most important thing. How did Jada feel and what did Jada want? Let's not, let's not be all, I found it to be super gross toxic masculinity defending my family shit. I know that not everybody felt that way, but I thought, does she actually want this? Yeah, sometimes you do want, of course you always

want your loved ones to stand up for you. Do you really want your loved one to go, you know, slap somebody on your behalf? Yeah, you know, isn't necessarily to cause a huge giant scene in a formal event, even if it wasn't the Oscars and we were just at like a private non-televised formal event. Yeah. It was like a comic on stage. It'd be humiliating. Yeah. And maybe, you know, we don't, she, her, sure, she had like a very coy Instagram post about it.

We don't, as of recording, really know what she wanted in the moment or how she feels about it now. But I think that what Jackie said is like, if there is literally one person in Hollywood who is extremely skilled at confronting. conflict in a like beautiful thoughtful way. It is literally Jada Pinkett Smith. She inspires me so much because of that. And like that is such a big part of like it's so cool to watch someone in real time. Like no, we need to learn and to grow together by the power of communication. And that's why I like Red Table Talks.

And this is the opposite of that. That it undo it undoes so much. And the fact of like I said this to you guys before we started recording of like, if my partner did that and I had kids, I'd be like, I don't want you, even if they were grown, I don't want you around my kids for a while. I need space. I need to go figure out how I feel about the situation.

Oh yeah, you need to go, you need to specifically address this in therapy. You know what I mean? I will say too, you know, I think people shared on the roundtable page there was an incident back in college. We were doing murder fist. I got into a bit of an argument

in the backstage during a show with John. my buddy from MurderFist, and it led to me hitting him on the back, and, you know, people were like, you know, see what old was going to say about this and all this guy's stuff. It was like sort of a meme they created. And it was, you know, honestly, like we laughed about it on that podcast or whatever, and we had quickly made amends, obviously worked together for years after that. But that said, that is a moment in my life that I think back on even 20 years later and shudder about.

And like, when I saw the meme pop up, I was like, oh, fuck, man. because that is a moment that I'm glad we were able to move past it and continue to work together still even today, but it was not cool. And I knew that wasn't cool. And I knew it wasn't cool the second I did it. You know what I mean? And so, you know, I don't know.

I just want to throw that out there that like, yeah, I mean, I'm still, you know, I'm still in therapy specifically. I started doing therapy to work on anger shit. You know what I mean? Because it's just not fucking cool. and that wasn't on stage at a formal event to a person who literally just made like one offhandage. I mean, you know, whatever. I'm not like try to like walk it back.

But still, it's just even a thing I did for a millisecond when I was 20 is something that still fucks with me. You know what I mean? So I just don't, I just, I don't see it. And that's actually a really good point. I don't see how it's okay. You know what I mean? Like I just don't see that. It's a good point.

Like, I, you know, like, when we talk about violence, I think that it actually is important to also talk about how violence hurts the person who does it. And I think that's like a, especially if, you know, if you're not like a serial, you know, serially violent person. Like, you know, that in that moment when you slapped John, like, it's something that, that hurt, that, you know, it doesn't absolve your responsibility, but it hurt you too. I was like the sketch groups over. Yeah. I'm over. I ruined a friendship. One of my best friendships I've made in college.

Literally all of that went through my head the second it happened. And then the funniest part, we had to go on stage, John in an adult diaper, and had to be a rapping baby. And I was his cocaine-fueled record executive. And we're professionals. Back in the day. And we got through it. And we went through the whole sketch. And it was inside.

I wish I had video of that because we had literally just like had a friendship ending moment. And then had to go on stage and be a rap babylon the rapping baby. And I'm sure there was nothing problematic about any of the lines in that sketch. So that completely holds up in every way. No, I'm just glad that we have a save space here that we can be able to talk from our separate perspectives about how we feel about this. And again, like MJ you said so beautifully before, of that there's a lot of this we can't speak towards. And we are completely 100% acknowledge that. And I apologize if I was getting too, to reel over here, to confession corridor over here.

No, it's fine. People want, I think people want to hear, you know, I mean, this is such a crazy thing that happened. I think for two seconds, it was like, wow, this is going to be like, that's nice, great to talk about. And then literally the next day I was like, I don't even know if I want to talk. Like, this is so crazy. No, and all of this stuff happened. We didn't even talk about the hashtag Oscars fan favorite, which were all of those interstitial.

segments of the I guess that Snyder has diehard crazy army of fans like what's wrong with you people? Why are you Zach Snyder people? You know it was pretty good? I enjoyed it. The Snyder cut I thought was

a decent make good on a really fucked up bad original version but like you're a diehard Snyder. I think that it seems a bench so if you were wondering about those interstitials in the Oscars of like random movies that were being played and random

And like it was essentially a Twitter-based poll where people could choose their own Oscar fan favorites. So what happened? It was incoherent. It was a bunch of trolls when Alman got exactly what they wanted to play during the Oscars, which you know what? Good on them. Yeah, that's fun. Wow. Breaking the speed barrier or whatever.

And then again, Zach Snyder's Army of the Dead, which I've never heard of. That Johnny Debt movie, the Minimata, which I've never seen. I was like, what the hell is that? I immediately looked it up. My thing I was going to talk about was just like, how many years now, okay, we got through the Me Too thing, we're past the,

I saw your boob song at the Oscars. But how many more years is it? Just kidding. How many more is it? But there are more slappable moments than that at the Oscars. When do we get to the part where we stop objectifying everybody?

Because of course in this one, you also have, is it Regina? Who is it? Regina Hall? Yeah, that was also. weird. Paraded a bunch of the guys up on stage, literally groped who was,

the next presenter in front of everybody. It was like the most awkward, like, hey, why don't we just like not do this? Like, I don't know, when it, you know, when are they going to stop thinking that that will also be funny, women doing it to men? Yeah. It's just like, and I don't care, it's not like a big deal to be. I just think it's hilarious.

The double standards of the hypocrisy and like, all of it. It all's just like, I don't know, the whole thing and the awkward thing with Kirsten Dunst, making her stand up the scene film thing. And I know that I'm sure she was in on it from the beginning, but it was just fucking so awkward and I just don't get it. How did like how would you do comedy after that?

Like honestly, I just only felt so bad. Like that Amy Schumer, Kirsten Dunst scene fell hard flat. But do you imagine going back after that happened being like, okay, we got to do that bit we came up with who gives this shit, we just got to get the show done.

We got to get this fucking show done. And Schumer had a funny line when she was like, I was getting the Spider-Man costume off. Did I miss anything? Like, that was funny, you know, like, yeah, yeah, that was, yeah, that was, yeah, that was, yeah, that was funny. But yeah, she was, even, Amy Schumer even said, like, I just can't, like, oh, I'm still in Shogging and sad, I'm proud of myself and my co-host, but yeah, waiting for this sickening feeling to go away from what we all witnessed. And I think that, that's a pretty decent sum up, too, of, like, the vibe in the room, you know, of what that did to that room of people who were there to celebrate great achievements. You want to go and sit there? I mean, it's hilarious. You sent us, one of the

articles you said this was so hilarious. Now I'm looking out for it. Everyone wants to be like, celebrities, blah. I hate that. They're so dumb, right? Guys, I'm cool, right? I'm cool sitting in my apartment writing freelance articles for this fucking website. I'm cool, guys. I hate them too. Kind of thing. But at the end of the day, a lot of people in that room worked really fucking hard. That was a night to like celebrate a lot of hard work. It really is really is very chal. It's actually, I know it's crazy, but it actually does take a shitload of hard work, even for those

beautiful actors that are so talented and have, you know, feed off a silver spoon. Even those people, it takes a lot of fucking work to get it, to make an Oscar nominated film and then do the whole rigmarole of like all the press and shit that you have to go through

to get to that moment and then, you know, see who wins. And it's, and it was stage all of them, you know, like, I think that's the, you know, that's just what I kept coming back to. And Jackie, I do really value hearing your perspective as, you know, a domestic violence survivor too, because that's one that I didn't have and that like the kind of visceral immediate reaction that a lot of people, I think, you know, in the moment. Like, I felt like I was being overdramatic when like I got so nauseous.

And then when it wasn't until I talked about it in therapy that I was like, oh. And people are trying to play. Yeah, that makes total sense. Makes sense. People are trying to play that down too, but it's, again, you didn't, you're talking about it now. It's not like you went and had your, like, this is about me tweet or whatever. And people are trying to shit on, I think a lot of people. I also didn't tell anyone at the time.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I was like, this is, you're just, okay, go out. You're high, whatever. Yeah, yeah. I also wanted to say, like, throw up my appreciation for Chris Rock again, where I appreciated that Wanda Sykes came out and said, right after it happened Chris, uh, and it was talking to Wanda Sykes. And she said that Chris Rock apologizes. to her. And she's like, why are you apologizing to me? And he was like, it was supposed to be your night. You and Amy and Regina were doing such a great job. I'm so sorry. This is how,

what this is going to be about now. I'm so interested to hear. And I appreciate that. More from him. He's got a gig in Boston, I think this weekend. All of his shows are sold out. I won't say, you know what, if there, don't worry about that. At least he's going to, he's going to clean the fuck up, man. He handled it. I think he handled it. I think he handled it not only from a performance perspective, he handled it very artfully. I think from a, like you said, Holden, I think from a de-escalation perspective, he handled it artfully. He could have escalated it and he did it. And when Will said stop, he said, I'm going to. You know, like, that was a very real moment. He was like, I'm going to stop. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, you know,

he got slapped and it must have hurt as he just kept going, you know. It wasn't, I mean, it wasn't like he got punched with a close fist. He got slapped, but it would be very jarring. I'm very scary. It doesn't matter. He's 30 years old. Yeah. I've been cold-cocked. I've been punched in the face out of nowhere by some crazy guy in New York. It's just, you know, it's not like he broke anything, but I was just, it's shocking. It's shocking. And I was just on my way to work. I wasn't on stage trying to like do, you know, comedy in front of fucking millions of people. Yeah.

I mean, it's just like, yeah. Unbelievable. I mean, who knows what I don't, I couldn't fathom how I would have handled that. Not as professionally as him. I don't think. I would have burst in a tear. I would have gotten on the floor and burst in tears. Yeah, I would have been in a little ball crying. And yeah, and Will Smith's tears, you know,

I think that he was, I think that he was obviously feeling a lot of emotions. I don't know. Obviously, he reacted out of anger. And I think that what, how bad he fucked. Yeah, I think that he knew he had made a huge mistake. He just, he just, he spent so long. He spent years and years trying to get to that moment.

Yeah, man, you upstaged yourself. 15 minutes before. He fucked it up. You ruined it. You upstaged yourself. Your entire career has been building towards this moment. And you upstaged yourself and you knew it in the moment. But he was still, I think, too mad to apologize to Chris Rock.

He apologized to a million other people. Or two, God knows what was being said between the publicist in him and between the take. There's that picture of his publicist speaking to him like during the commercial break. Yeah. I mean, God knows. I mean, there's so much damage control. So Lord knows they weren't, they might have even been like, don't have. apologize. Don't do it yet. We have to, you know what I mean?

Yeah, right, right. Also, thinking of legally, and I could only imagine we've got to get Gideon on here of like what he was allowed to say, even though we all fucking saw it happen. Right, right. And also, yeah, and all the people being like, yeah, team will, talk shit, get hit, yada, yada, yada, like his ass said the next day in a big, well, his publicist is technically probably, but said in a big post on his Insta the next day, huge apology, violence is never the answer. And I didn't see anybody fucking retweeting that or commenting on that, all those people who were defending, walking up on stage and assaulting someone for saying five words

or whatever it was towards his wife. Like, I don't know. That also kind of always bothers me. Everyone wants to just like stick with the one thing and they don't, no one wants to like look at all the shit that happened at the show after that moment or anything, any reaction. Doesn't him apologizing and saying violence never the answer totally negate any of the arguments that it was like a just,

It was okay or, you know what I mean? And Chris Rock, I believe, also issued a statement apologizing as well for the whole thing. So, you know, it's also, you know, acknowledged that he felt the joke was not okay. That was the other thing. Yeah, Jackie, give us that. Yeah. Richard Williams, who is the, you know, the father of the William sisters who Will Smith was playing in King Richard openly was like, I do not condone violence. because like even in his acceptance,

he was like, he compared himself to Richard Williams, like, see, I'm just protecting my family. Yeah, that's, that's rough. This is what we do. And Richard Williams is like, I don't condone violence. Yeah, that's not what I do. Unless it is something out of self-defense. Yeah.

And that is, you know, that is a part of the movie as well. And I do appreciate that he openly said, like, don't compare yourself to me. Yeah. Yeah, I look pretty awkward to make a huge, huge career-altering. stake and then go up and be like, this is just like what this guy did that I said this in about. I said this to you guys and now I'm realizing it's because I was trying to find something else when right after this is happening. They kept, like during the acceptance speech, going back to the Williams sisters.

And one of the Williams sisters' nipple was showing from underneath her dress. I believe it was Venus is Williams's nipple. You could see half her nipple. And they kept cutting back in my head. All I could think was that like the censors would rather. show a woman who is having a wardrobe malfunction, which in any other case, they would have immediately cut away from her.

Yeah, no one's even talked about it. There are a couple of articles about it, but it was because it was during Will Smith's shit-ass acceptance speech of him saying that he's not at fault, he's just protecting his family, and that that is also going on and that the American public

didn't glom onto only that, that shows how big of a fucking thing this is. And maybe I think, you know, the people who watched it, because I didn't even catch that until you told me, again, that's how. Yeah, Jackie just texted that nipple, and we were both like, what are you talking about? Well, I only know because it was, because at this point, and this is why I really want someone to make a movie just about the people in that production booth. Yeah.

Like, you know, the people who call the shots of each, I, all I want to, and I love also somebody made the Offender joke like, it's weird to see something live that you know will be in a biopic, like 10 years from now, whatever. You know what I mean? Like, for sure, that is going to be recreated. in a biopic. But regardless, I don't think we saw

the nipple slip is I think we were too focused on the crestfallen looks is how I would describe it on the William's sisters faces. I will also say though

real quick, the Nicole Kidbin picture of everyone's like this is what Nicole Kid made who looked like after it was happening. It wasn't, that was when she saw

Jessica Chastain and how beautiful her dresses. Also, can we give it up for Jessica Chastain? Yeah, she did great, man. I think it's great. Arriana DeBose, fucking congratulations.

There's so many, and I know that, like, we don't need to do that. They don't give a fuck about our existence. But there's just so many people that deserve, like, this is such a monumental night. Fuck you, Will Smith, for taking that away from them.

I think that that sucks the most. Speaking of pictures being misleading to, there's this picture going around by fucking morons, sharing this picture, trying to reveal that the whole thing was staged by the way their postures were in the way,

apparently even that picture was digitally doctored. Of course it was. You fucking moral. You get out. I'm done. Everyone, moratorium on conspiracy theories. They got to go.

We got to go. We got to get rid of it for a couple years. Just a couple years. On our show, what about it is. I was going to say, holy, you know what time it is.

Is it time? It is. Much like at the Oscars, do we, are we able to transition into a goofy, nonsensical celebrity conspiracy? Do you want to be goofy?

I can be goofy. All right. Let's get into it. We have to play ourselves off here with the movie. Anything I think, yeah, before we move on.

anything else needs to be to say. I think we covered all of it. I think I've gotten it all across. It's also fucking just a ridiculous moment. And hopefully we just move on. And Twitter's stupid and like, you know what you mean? I didn't like what Billy Elish was wearing. I just think.

I didn't like it. And I don't know shit about fashion, but that was awful. I agree with that. And you know I love Billy Elish. You know, and we're going to have Confession Corner over here. I think that Billy Eilish's

James Bond's. song was very similar to Adele's James Pond song. I'm fucking saying. I am saying it. I need to get it off my chest. So funny. Yeah, it's just the whole thing. And also, Jada Pickett Smith's dress,

the green dress, has been on just as many worst dress lists. Yes. What does that dress? I don't understand. She looks fucking amazing. She's, that's why the whole thing is like with the best and worst dress.

I'm so glad you've, this time there were a couple of lists you sent to compare. And you're like, oh, the whole thing's stupid. Half the people on the worst are on the best. Because there's like, Shalden was on the worst. She looked great. Olivia Colman was Sean Mendez,

who was just wearing a suit. I was on so many of these lists where I'm like, come on. It's literally a suit. There is not, I don't know if that, but like Zoe Kravitz, Mama Mia.

You know, also I think, I wonder if a lot more people are going to be watching the Grammys, which are this weekend, I believe. I know I'm gonna have. I don't know if I can handle it with you. I don't know if I can do it.

A week ago about whether there would be violence at the Grammys because of Kanye. Oh, no. We didn't do this. Did we do this? Did we do it? I think we might have conceded and the fact that we were all watching

and texting about it at once. It does feel like it was sort of some kind of magical effect we have. Yeah, I think we summoned this to happen. It was something we didn't want, but somehow we summoned it. Can we summon like, watching a consensually sold sex tape between Penelope Cruz and Hopiardham.

There's any way that we could get some sort of ony fans between the two of them because that was the joke that Chris Rock made right before the Will Smith. And I look at the two of them like, mama me. Woo! Get in my bed. Uh, uh, uh, uh, you'll make a me come. You know what I mean? I'm ready for fun.

I'm ready for frivolity holding. Don't you see? Do you believe it? Chris Rock's body double? No. Now I've heard everything. Oh, no. This one comes, don't worry too.

If you want more Oscar stuff, I've got some Oscar blinds coming your way in a little bit. All right, this one comes in from Haley, who wrote, Hi, Holden, Jackie, and MJ. We all know and love to hate Chris Rock, not just because of his terrible politics and music, but because he's a phony with a wealthy background, who acts like he's a working class, every man. I will say I did, before his weird, like that weird song you put out more recently

and his like boomer shit he's been doing. I did love how he like made venues sell beer at cheaper prices and sell tickets at cheaper prices so that his audience, who he knew was not necessarily like. Again, we're not 100% behind all of Chris Rock's ideals and beliefs, but I will say, that doesn't mean, did I say, oh, Kid Rock? No. Wait, did you say Chris Rock?

I said Chris Rock. Kid Rock's body double. Oh, we need to do this all over again because I was thinking immediately something. I was like, body double, what do you mean? Yeah. Okay, let's start it over. Let's sing the song. Hit me with the share. Do you believe it?

Kid Rock's body double? This one comes in from Haley, who wrote High Holden, Jackie, MJ. We all know and love to hate Kid Rock, not just because of his terrible politics and music, but because he's a phony with a wealthy background who acts like he's a working class every man. Indeed. But we got to get on the cruise! Yeah, and I will also shout out outside of his weird boomer shit that he's doing especially lately and yeah, the politics. I did love how he made tickets more affordable for his fans and stuff like that and force venues to sell beer at cheaper prices because he knows his audience.

But yeah, and the cruise sounds fun, but either way. But there's something even worse the Kid Rock is hiding. And it's not just whatever happened when Tucker Carlson visited his Cadillac pussy VIP room. Does Kid Rock, I don't even know what that is, by the way. That's so gross. Does Kid Rock not even party? Is his most likable quality that he sucks, but he might be fun to drink with? A lie?

I love this theory, by the way. Yeah, this is good because that is his only redeemable quality that maybe he'd be fun at a party, although obviously not because he's a fucking pig. I recently found a comment on an Ask Reddit thread about the worst celebrity encounters and there were several very specific Kid Rock stories. The first commenter describes going

to a Kid Rock show with his friend who had backstage passes to meet Kid. They had a great time and continued drinking and having fun with other fans backstage after the show. Finally, Kid Rock comes out, long stringy hair, a bandana, at least one piece of clothing with an American flag on it.

Everyone's super stoked. He's smiling, shaking hands, doing shots with people. but something seems off. The commenter slowly realizes that the man they're hanging out with backstage is not Kid Rock. It was a body double slash celebrity impersonator who was fucking dressed like Kid Rock. Then another person chimed in and said almost the exact same thing happened to them. They won a radio contest to party with Kid Rock, showed up at a hotel bar with the other winners where they proceeded to get tipsy before Kid arrived.

and surprise, the person who showed up was again a body double who looked like Kid Rock and partied with them all night. So basically, Kid Rock has at least one impersonator that he hires to hang out with his fans who I assume are drunk and usually none the wiser, all to keep up his fun-loving party guy persona while he probably just has a cup of tea and goes to sleep in his hotel room. But I guess it's like his new song says, ain't nobody going to tell him how to love. Oh, my God. Right?

Hopefully this wasn't too long that you guys get his little. much of a kick out of this as I did. Love you so much and please people never go to the Cadillac Pussy VIP room, Haley. I love you. There's so many, you know, there's always the rumor of like this person hired an impersonator to

like perform for the, do a gig for them, do like work for them. So the idea that someone's hiring an impersonator to party in their stead is the funniest fucking gig ever. I think it's kind of a great idea, honestly. That's the thing. It sucks because it's Kid Rock, but I do got to say I support it for the partier. That would

be a fun job. Also very fun for Kid Rock to not have to party. It's two things I love, partying and not partying. And I think I hate to say that it's a yes from me. Yeah, it's also a yes for me, dog. I think he's got multiple impersonators. I love it. I love it.

That's great. Yeah, for sure. I hate that I'm so aligned with something that Kid Rock is doing because I do think it's kind of a great idea. It's the only thing we will give it up to him for. That's it always kind of has like big sunglasses on and like the bandana.

I mean, it's just so easy to, you know, pull it off, I feel like. It's so easy to, uh, yeah, that could be anybody. Yeah, he looks like every regular at a dive bar in like the south, pretty much. There's at least one guy that looks exactly like him at the bar. So probably, you can probably hire one at any town you're in. It's probably not even the same guy.

Especially where people still want to watch Kid Rock perform. And I do feel that it's like, I'm only saying this because beneath my hometown is where the Kid Rock cruise leaves from. So I know Kid Rock territory. Get that Uncle Cracker on board and I tell you what everybody's dancing. I believe. Hell yeah. Well, just in case you forgot, a man was slapped.

Oh, God, Holden. We have to move on from the slap and get to the list. Oh! Who's on the list? Hey, gotta have that list. Is it about people who've been slapped? Listen, honestly, it's not a lot of people. Celebrity slaps.

There's nothing to do with it. It does have to do with bizarre details of celebrity deaths. I was trying to not get, I was trying to pivot away from what I knew we were going to talk about for the rest of it. The 70s. Yeah, yeah. Actually, the real reason why I chose this, I chose this list specifically is because Henry was just in Memphis. And they went to. Elvis's house and reading this, Henry and we're actually talking about this, so I thought it was

Kazma that I read this list. Elvis's colon. One thing they don't tell you about partying like a rock star is that all those drugs make you super constipated. Elvis's personal doctor recently claimed it's what killed the king. And while that's probably not entirely true, his autopsy did reveal 30 pounds of burning love in his colon, which was twice as wide and long as a normal one as a result of chronic constipation. We all know that Elvis died on the toilet.

I did not know this part of the story. Wow. I always talk about a documentary I love, it's a very short documentary called The Burger and the King. I saw when I was in high school visiting a friend. And we had dinner and the parents had some friends over and we all sat around. and just, it's a documentary. I never knew how insane his eating habits were. Oh, yeah.

Crazy. Those banana peanut butter sandwiches, like his housekeeper, I think it's footage of her, like, or his cook or whatever, she showed how she did it. She would literally melt like four entire sticks of butter in the pan. It's too much butter.

And then, like, put the bread in. This is coming from an Italian woman from Queens of like, I know how to make things rich. I know how to make things delicious. But four sticks of butter. is too much for one, Sanct. Right. He just ate like a fucking psycho,

but his body was like, you know, he was just... He wasn't shitting it out! His younger years, he was, his metabolism, everything was fine, but there was obviously a turning point for him, and that's why we got big, fat Elvis was like, he just kept eating the way he always ate

and it just caught up with him. I mean, isn't that the problem with most of our lives? Yes. Definitely my mind. You called? I knew about it. Definitely why I just had to cut beer out for a little while

because I was just like, oh, I can't do it like I did it in college and Brooklyn doing sketch comedy. No, but don't worry. At least no one's ever going to try to steal your brain after you died like they did with Einstein. The pathologist who performed the brilliant physicist autopsy helped himself to his brain, hoping to find out what made it so good.

The brain was considered missing for more than 20 years until the pathologist revealed it to a journalist, whipping out two mason jars full of brain from a cider box in his office. Oh, oh, I got brain cabinet right over, y'all. That's actually the most upsetting thing it's been talked about on this episode. You're welcome.

See, that's part of what I wanted with this. We don't brain stealing in any way on this episode. But we understand how you could see that it's actually a good thing to do. Well, we got it. It's science, isn't it? How else are we supposed to find out? Yeah, I'm not a scientist.

I can't speak for scientists, okay? So... Now, this has nothing to do with science. Princess Diana predicted her own death. In 2003, her butler revealed a note, she wrote to him, that the Guardian ruled apparently genuine, discussing her fears that someone was planning an accident in my car, break failure and serious head injury in order to make the path

clear for Charles to marry. There's no evidence that death was indeed anything other than an accident, but it might have worked out really well for that unnamed person. Interesting. I believe that. Sunny Bono was on drugs. All right, please. Oh, Sunny Bono was on drugs, and everybody knows it,

even though he claimed to not be on drugs. But it's not everybody that knows that his widow blamed his prescription drug habit of 15 to 20 pills. a day that we all know that he died during an accident, but his wife feels that there were other things involved. Did he run into a tree also while skiing, just like Natasha Richardson? But he was a lot of drugs at the time.

Maybe he was like, look, hey guys, look at I'm going to go kiss that tree over there. I believe it was the last thing he said because he was so hopped up. And then he hit the tree too hard. Now this I did know from the documentary, I think there was Grand Parson's fallen angel. So fucking cool. Oh my God. The story of Graham Parsons' death is very, and I love Grand Parson. He's like Flying Burrito Brothers, old school country musician, Grand Parson's.

The singer's manager claims he wanted to be cremated and his ashes scattered a Joshua tree. But his family instead planted a traditional burial in Louisiana. So he kidnapped his former client's body from the airport, drove it to Joshua Tree, and lit the body on fire. He only succeeded in alarming nearby police, because turns out that's not how you cremated body. You don't pull it out into the desert after he steal it from the airport and set it on fire.

And even though it was his want after his death, he was one of the 27 Club, and Lord knows what he was on when he said that that's what he wanted. I hear at page 7, we don't condone the stealing of a corpse from an airport. Can I say that? Yeah, I think we can, we don't condone brain stealing, corpse stealing, or slapping. Those are three things. We can't speak for corpses, okay?

That's one thing we just can't do, but I'm pretty sure. Or we can speak for overdoses, I guess. Um, this list, this is not my own words, a thwarted threesome, killed Janice Joplin, speaking of the 27 club. To be clear, it's almost impossible to murder someone with your sexual choices, but it's true that the night before she died, Joplin had planned a threesome with her fiance and ex-girlfriend, and they both bailed on her. She got bored and sad, bought some heroin, and overdosed, allegedly. The ex thinks she got too high and hit her head. Bum bum bum Who knows about the deaths

So let's end it with Rasputin's penis Why? He's not even a celebrity Oh he's a bit Oh we all know resputinous Rah Rasputin According to legend

The Mad Monk's impressive unit Was either cut off by his killers Or stolen from the morgue by an old flame Somehow a group of Russian women living in Paris Believe the sacred Dong had made its way to them And they worshipped whatever it was they had until his daughter supposedly showed up to reclaim it. You know what?

I'm always going. I'm like, where's my daddy's dick? You got my daddy's dick? You got my daddy's dick? Eventually, the proprietors aren't saying how. It completed its trip around the continent and ended up back in Russia at the museum of Russian erotica, where it remains on display. That is my list.

Wow. Fantastic. How do you feel about a penis? Blind. Oh, you know. Oh, you feel blind. You can't see him. No.

Now it can't happen because we didn't. No, it's like the rest of the Oscars. Oh, we can't see him. I think I'm going. Blind. Item. Now we can't see him. All right.

Oscar blinds. You know what? It's kind of like a compliment sandwich of Oscar blinds. It's two positive blinds with one negative blind in the middle of people's behavior at the Oscars. So here we go. Here's the first one. Yeah, two kind blind blinds. Kindness blinds.

That's very nice. Two kinds. I think we need a little, you know, we gotta bring it a little. Do good guidelines. Yeah, yeah. We've got to bring it a little positivity, right, to the Oscars and everything. So here we go. First one, this permanent A-list country singer who has also acted and had an affair or two during her first marriage.

Well, that's not very kind. Was passing out big tips to anyone who helped her last night. Big tips? The more she made use of the bar, the more generous she became. Reba? Yeah, Reba. I was just saying before everything went to shit at the askers how I just, whenever Reba performs, I'm just like, okay. I don't feel strongly one way or the other.

I like her a lot. You love her? Oro. I love her presence. Yeah. And I love hearing this that she was like, hand it out tips, the bigger they were, the drugger she got, I love it. That speaks after my heart. I know that this really not necessarily is about Reba, but have you watched Bob Barbin Star go to the Vista Del Mar.

No, Jay. I've heard that it's amazing. I think it's incredible. I can't recommend it to you enough. It's so funny. And Reba only is a small part in it, but I think that, like, honestly,

if you're having, like, a really bad day, put on Barb and Star, go to the Vista Del Marr. It's so good. I've watched it, I think, at this point, four or five times.

Okay. And what new movie can I actually say that about? It's like Anchorman style in the sense of it's totally innocuous and ridiculous. Just two friends, just trying to go on vacation.

But female driven, so, like, less gross in certain ways. Yeah. You know what he means? So, like, yeah, it's so good. I have no negative feelings about Reba McIntyre. It's all positive. I just like, it's not, she's not somebody where I'm like, yes, I get to hear Reba sing.

I'm just like, oh, Reba. Oh, yeah, Reba's nice. Honestly, I kind of have her in the same category as Dolly Parton for me of like how I. I hold Dolly Parton up a little higher, though. Of course, because Dolly Parton is, you know, is the people's everything. The people's champ. But Reba McIntyre is great. She's great.

Consistently great. Yeah. All right, here we go. The negative one. Prepare to be angry. He got slapped. Yeah, a man was slapped in the middle of the war. Is that what it is?

No, of course not. Who did it? No, one said that, I'm not reading a blind word, said that Will Smith had been drinking that night, and then he will soon be going to, quote, unquote, rehab. I was going to mention that, but then I didn't, because I was like, oh, maybe he famously doesn't drink or something. I couldn't remember.

And also, everyone knows that the Oscars, they, like, barely give you anything. So even if he did, he would have to bring his own. Well, apparently he might be headed towards the, in the blind it said quote unquote rehab because it'll be like Scientology's like rehab, not rehab, rehab, so, but regardless. Here we go, it's not about him or that.

At the magazine party, this foreign-born A-list comic actress treated all the help like crap. She is really turning into a not-nice person. Well, obviously it's Vanity Fair. It's Vanity Fair Oscar party. And she, we hate her in a movie as a big old fat cat. Is it Rebel Wilson? Yeah, yes.

Jenny Annie fucking Dots! Oh, Jenny Annie Dots. Oh, you're going to lose the weight. Now you're going to be a bitch. I'm sorry, I shouldn't say those things. But remember where you came from. I should correct myself. I made a mistake.

I thought I had two kindness points. I only had the one about Rebots. This is a negativity pancake. The butter was on top was the kind one. Oh, that was the kind of. To pancake. I think we feel good about Rebo. We do not feel good about Rebel Wilson.

Well, I mean, we certainly don't like Jenny Anydots. That's for me. This one makes a lot of sense to me, but at the same time, I wish it wasn't true just because I like some stuff that, a lot of stuff this actor's done, especially more recently. The meme actor was his usual jerk self last night and barely paid attention to anyone who couldn't do him,

a favor. He just was scrolling nonstop through a dating app. He's fancy. At the Oscar. Timothy Shalame? Yes. Really? Well, good for him. He's in his prime. Go on the app. He's not even, he wasn't like, I mean, I know he's in a movie that won a bunch of awards, but like, he's a kid.

He's in a movie that, like, won the most awards of the night. But, dude's really good. This is my problem, though. This is the problem that I live with. Jeff's like, so I guess that means we should watch Dune again. Every night, every night. Maybe we should just throw on Dune. Why don't we just watch Dune again?

He's watched it twice already. I've seen it already. Better than Power the Slog. I mean, come on. If you had to choose between. MJ, don't watch Power of the dog. Don't, don't watch it. It's a no for a must dog.

It's a bit of a sloth. Great. I would say, we said it on talking TV. Great acting, like great performances. The writing. Really? Or just the whole, yeah, and the pacing and just the whole. It's also, it was nothing new.

It was just like, don't you see because like, oh, he's got to, he's angry because he's not allowed to feel the way he wants to feel. It's like, been there, done that, give me something fucking new. If you're going to have Bennett Cover Patch, if you're going to have Jesse Plumman's, you're going to have Kristen Dunst. And of course, Jesse Plumman's, Gerson Dunst, both up for Oscars. they did a great job with their characters. But if you're doing one of these big go-for-the-go-the-cold Oscar movies, I think you should do it a little bit better. Yeah.

Yeah, we didn't even talk about the Sam Elliott. We're talking about nothing else. Like, just like the rest of the world. Just like the way, yeah. Even our own podcast was overshadowed anything we could have spoken about. You upstage us, Will. You upstage us from talking about all the other controversies we could have been talking about. Yeah, and talking about the old

CFO of a goop that openly was like no, it's a horrendous, toxic work environment. Well, also that one person was like, it's horrible what they do. I stopped doing cleanses altogether, except recently. I tried a new cleanse. And I like

the cleanse. I'm like, all right, yes, but also. You know what's a lot going on when we haven't even talked about how Jane Campion called Sammy Elliott a little bit? And then she sat in her own shit by fucking shitting on Venus and Serena Williams like a major white feminist.

Yep. There's a lot going on. A man was slapped and that's where we'll leave it. A man was slapped and there it is. So there it is. And I can see again and Timothy, I'm coming for you dude. I'm going to teach you some etiquette. No, no, no, man.

Let Timothy be. Well, kiss, yes, I'll kiss him, but I'll also teach him etiquette. Kiss him, leave his shirt off. And then. Kiss sandwich. I kiss him. I'd be like, hey, stop just paying attention to people to do favors for you.

And then I kiss them again and I disappear. All I know is that I'm really excited to watch Oscar Isaac be Moon Night. I don't give a fuck about Moon Night, but I will watch Oscar Isaac. I am going to watch Moon Night very, very quickly. I'm going to watch it. I have a chance to.

Yes, that's going to be very good. And you can see again, Holden? I can super see again, y'all. Wow. Congratulations. I'm really happy for you. I greatly appreciate that. It's all a matter of perspective, isn't it?

We did it. We talked about it. We talked about it. And I think we had fun. Do you think they're going to take the Oscar away? Do you think they're going to take it away? I'm very interested to see the things. I already thought I heard that they definitely weren't going to do that.

I think actually, what be Goldberg on the view. She's a part of the whatever. She was like, she said they're not taking it away, but there will be consequences. But I think it's April 14th is the hearing of the academy to see what is going to end up happening. with Will Smith in the future. And I don't, even that, I don't know about all that. Like, it's more of just like, let's have a conversation and let's talk about it. Rather than, yeah, it's tough to know what.

Shame him. Right. Like, what consequences would be meaningful other than like a, yeah, like a kind of restorative justice approach where he like really truly acknowledges like the harm that he did, you know. Yeah. Is it volunteer work? Is it like, you know, it's something. Like, he needs to do something.

And that's, honestly, like, I actually think if what comes out of this, which has kind of happened so far, is, like, a meaningful acknowledgement from both parties that, like, I think Chris Rock has acknowledged, like, I said something hurtful. And, like, and then if Will Smith, his apology was a little bit PR, but, like, if each party acknowledges, like, something, something really hurtful happened and this was my role in it, like, that's really the best you can help more after a cop. Totally. I mean, honestly, I'm just, I'm definitely going to watch the Grammy. this weekend. And if something fucked up happens along similar lines.

Get the text loop ready. It's going to be crazy. Whatever is your text loop that sustains you, get it going for the Grammys.

Yes. It probably won't, but wow, if it does. I mean, that it's going to cause a fucking shit store. Then we will be

in a truly in another, in another world. Yeah. Like a post violence at the awards show world. It's like, when would it not happen

at a world? You know what I mean? It'll be weird that it did. Like, no one was hurt at this show. Anyways, all right, I think that's about it. Do we shout? Do the plugs? Oh, we do the plugs.

Yeah. And then we shout. How could I forget? Thank you guys so much for joining us and for stewing in our juices for a while. My name is Jackie Zabrowski. You can follow me on Instagram at Jack That Worm. You can also find whatever weird shit I'm doing over on the TikTok over on page 7 LPN because I'm left of my own devices.

and I am making content. And you can come hang out with me on Tuesdays and Sundays over on Twitch.com. Oh, no, it's Jackie. We talk about sex. We try to fuck daddies. And it's the best. And you should come hang out.

Well, yeah, check me out. Twitch.combe forward slash holdenators ho. Monday, Tuesday, Friday streams. Uh, yeah, just come join us Friday especially. Jackie and I, we will be screaming some more. I'm sure we'll be fucking, maybe we won't. Maybe we won't. to talk about it, but I'm sure it'll come up.

So there you go. You can join us for more discourse over there. It'll come up. Especially as we drink more and more and more. Oh, yes. That's at 6pm ET, Twitch.com, forward slash hold an eight or so. And yeah, Patreon.com forward slash page seven podcast at gmail.com.

Page the numeral seven podcast at gmail.com. Please send me your conspiracies. Please send me your blinds. I'm always checking them every single week. And I really love that you guys do that. So yeah, keep them coming. All right. M.J.

My name's MJ and I'm MJKLKat on Instagram. Love you guys. Let's sing the song. Shout, shout, shout, let it all out. These are the emails that you wrote in about. Come on. Slap. I'll read them to you.

Come on. Ahoy, hoi. Thank you guys so much for sending in your shoutouts to page 7 podcast at gmail.com. Oh, yeah, yoy, it makes my week. I love you guys so much, and I read absolutely everything that you send in, unless obviously it's labeled conspiracy or blind items. I don't look at them, but remember to put it in the subject line so that I don't look at it. I don't want to know. But what I do want to know is how much y'all love each other, and I would.

want you guys to know how much I love our community. We're starting off. Thank you so much, Riza, Ann, for writing in. They say, I'm writing to you because in a few days, March 28th, I have been with my boyfriend Jasper for two years. And yes, we met during the pandemic, because who didn't need tender love and during uncertainty? He introduced me to Roundtable of Gentlemen, and now I sit here and listen to Page 7, because you guys are exactly what I need during my not-so-fun job. He is the reason why I came to know last podcast network, and now I can't get enough of it. Jasper has been my rock, and I can't help but brag, but he's just the best thing that could happen to me.

Oh, I'm so happy for you guys. Even more so, I just finished listening to episode 442 of page 7, and let's just say nothing solidifies the romance more than laying gaseous clouds with the person you love, although I am allowed to make a face, but internally, I embrace it. So this one is for you, baby. I made it with my own hands. Thank you, everyone, on page seven, for keeping me company and giving me laughs while I work and being fucking cool. I love you guys and Jasper.

Happy two years and many more to come, baby. I love you guys. Thank you guys so much for writing in about your love. And I know that making an assumption makes an ass out of me and me. and then it's an ass Mimi. But I think that this is Shelby Webb's, and I just want to say, I love you so much. Shelby Webb is a part of our amazing Twitch community, as well as the Jack Pack Rise Up. Shelby says, listen to Jackie Reed Twilight, and joining the Twitch community has easily been

one of the best things to happen the last few years. Oh, I love you guys, too. The last couple of years have been fucking whack, but I'm back on track. Fuck yeah, baby. Better than ever and happy to be living life with my mini-human. partner, cats, and handsome dog. We've struggled with a lot of hard things, but it's made us more resilient and honestly having three kids

was a very fun nightmare. Anyways, it's my 27th birthday, April 6. Aries, babies, where y'all at? And I'm determined to make 27 the best year of my life so far. My kids are really starting to develop an actual personality. My partner and I are communicating better than ever, and I have the greatest group of online and in real life friends, and I'm so happy to be a part of this world at all.

Thanks, I love y'all, and we love you too, Shelby. Thank you so much for writing in. And oh, my God, oh, my God, Chris, you made me tear the fuck up. And then you, everybody knows it's difficult to happen. Kelsey, this is a happy birthday shoutout from your beloved, but I want you to know you got yourself a keeper. This old Yentel gives her blessing. Chris, your lover Kelsey

Seeps through your words And it makes my heart sing Chris says Kelsey is a caring, beautiful extremely loving And stupidly hilarious personality I moved into her tiny bachelor apartment In March 2020

After only a year of dating each other And through all the trials and errors of the pandemic Which Kelse likes to call The Pandemi Lavato We have miraculously made it through with our love for each other, growing stronger every day. Kelsey turns 29 on April 4th, and while she was excited to have a birthday

where she could once again gather with some of her friends, Kelsey's a really tight group of girlfriends affectionately referred to as the gaggle. It's a gagglewagglewaggle. Please say, Kelsey, that you call it the gagglewaggle when you guys go out on the town. But Chris said, I just got the bad news that I was in close contact with someone

who has tested positive for COVID. We both quickly agreed that it would now be irresponsible to have a house party, even a week after a potential exposure. The pandemic is not over, people. I know it will be a small birthday celebration again this year for Kelsey, but I also know that we will make the most of it and that we'll have a great time because we'll be together. Stop!

Lastly, to Kelsey, I want to close off by saying, I mean, Chris, you've got a lot more faith in me than I do. And that goes out to you, Kelsey, from Chris. Happy birthday, babe. at these, it's an Aries party. We're all invited. Oh, and I love this. Last but not least, I want to say thank you so much, Lila, for writing in. This is such a beautiful way to end the show today. And I just want to say thank you, especially with what happened at the fucking Oscars. I just want to say thank you for writing this in. Lula says, I would like to shout out any

listener, myself included, who was working through relationship issues of any kind, romantic or not, right now. After ending an incredible unhealthy long-distance friend-slash-hook-up relationship with a much older man I met as a teen, I befriended a guy who has been a rock in the sea of world fucked up this that we sailed into in March 2020. When I visited him recently, there was an incident, a secret he accidentally revealed. And all the insecurity and heartbrokenness and auto-aggressive tendencies from the toxic dude kicked in full force. My new friend is understanding and kind, but even though we talked through it and it went picture book well, the mental equivalent of a fractured bone happened with that interaction

between us. We set the bone and put it in a cast, but now it's still going to hurt for a while and take time and much care to heal. So to anybody out there having similar feelings and maybe using the company of page 7 to distract yourself, working through all the mental itching and smelliness under that metaphorical cast is so hard, and I applaud you for taking any step in the direction of healing. There is no shame in relapsing. Handling pain on top of everything else going on is a lot. Not to do a toxic positivity, but as a sometimes much-needed reminder from a person outside of your head, taking the cast off too soon and giving your mental bone time to heal will be worth it. Standing by my choice of metaphor, XOXO, XO, to all of you, Lila. And thank you so much for

writing that in. I think that we all need to hear that every once in a while, and especially coming from a source that we don't know. And I appreciate that. Take the time to heal. It's okay. And also, it's work. All relationships are work. And we got to put the work in to make it worth it. But that's not page seven material. That's, oh, no, it's Jackie material. But you should totally combine, hang out over on, oh, no, it's Jackie if you ever need to feel the community around you. Because we are here in Spades.

And I love you guys. And thank you so much for taking the time to listen to the shoutouts. Again, you can send in your own shoutouts to page seven podcast at gmail.com with seven, the number in there, page seven podcast at gmail.com. I hope you guys have a beautiful week. Keep loving your hearts. Put love out there. We have to be good to each other.

I love you guys. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors. You can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.