Page 7 - Ep. 476: HEY HILLARY

Episode Date: January 12, 2023

This week we're gossin' 'bout how far into Rachael Raydom is too far, The Sims of Our Lives, how to bang a mermaid, A NEW LPN SHOW, a fresh batch of royal tea (including THE CURTSY), Alec Baldwin being a total simp for some woman named Hillary on Insta, Celine Dion being LEFT OFF the Rolling Stone 200 Greatest Singers of All Time list, and in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner; Is Jung Kook from BTS the reincarnation of Princess Diana!? DA LIST, bLiNdZ and SHOOOUUUTZZ! Page 7 and Wizard and the Bruiser are going on TOUR! Dates and links to tickets at lastpodcastnetwork.com Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Hi, I'm Jackie Zabrowski. And I'm MJ. And I'm Holden from the Page 7 podcast, and we're going on tour! That's right, we're touring all up in this mother freaking country. I'm fake cursing so whatever, Jackie. Just say the filthy F word already. And we will say the filthy F word when we come to your town. That's right.

We're coming to Texas, the Midwest, the Northeast, and then right back here in Cali, baby. For ticket links and more details, visit lastpodcastnetwork.com. That's right, Last Podcast Network.com. Page 7 and Wizard and the Bruiser present. Release the butthole cut. Wait, that's really what we're calling the tour? Absolutely. Release the butthole cut.

For more information, go to Last Podcast Network.com. A sun will come out tomorrow. Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow. Oh. There'll be some. Yeah, that's a real. Just thinking about. What are you thinking about?

Tomorrow. There's a way to cobwebs and the sorrow Why? What's gonna happen? Till there's not when I'm studying with a day It's great lonely It's gonna keep going man Sting my head to my head, Jenny! Yeah, that's it.

That's, wow, that note, that beautiful angelic note What a way to bring us in to page seven It has been raining in Los Angeles For a week straight And they can't Angelian. knows we can't handle it no I love it personally I made a stoop yesterday it was everything I I love I thought you hate Rachel Ray and you're calling it a stoop I'm calling it a stoop wow it's the only thing I refuse to say EV O oh I'm not doing an Evo I'm not doing that Lexi does that in

video games Evo yeah is my like fighting game competition she's like can you pick up some Evo from the store and I'm like oh shit you want like a fight stick or say an Evo you can't do that that's going too far into Rachel Radom. But Stoop, I feel like is a really good way to describe it because I don't like a thin soup. I like a chunky soup. Hot take, Jackie. I don't know. I'm scaring, scary waters.

Good hat is still on. And I am talking, I'm not a thin soup person. I am a chunky soup person. I like texture. I like chunks in it. I want different, I want all across the board. I add vegetables at different times, so some are more. Are you?

Not entertaining. I'm literally staring at you chuckling. Yes, I'm clearly obviously entertained. Jackie, again, coming in hot with the bucket hat. Bucket bat. Energy. The fan art has been amazing and the stuffed animals that we got in the mail with bucket hats on in the form of Jackie and myself and MJ were incredible.

I've been wearing my bucket hats on stream. Yes, over on Twitch on TV. You're saying hats plural. You're saying hats plural, but I just seen the. No, I put on a couple other hats, not bucket hats specifically, but the problem is, is I have to figure out lighting with hats. Lighting with hats is difficult. Interestingly enough, what are the main purposes of a hat is to create a shadow over the face. Indra's saying very difficult for a performer who wants to see their eyes and the lights.

Yes, I did in fact step on Jackie's plug. Twitch.tv.4. Oh, no, it's Jackie. Thank you. These days with the Wednesday sim stream. Oh, my God, we're playing Sims. Right now I'm currently building Henry and Nell. Natalie's house, so you should totally come by and check it out. Oh, my God. M.J. Yeah, what am I up to? Majesigela, friends of us over on Twitch, built you and your family a brownstone that, like,

a full New York brownstone that we put inside of our L.A. Oh, you're going to come, you're going to be forced because now what I've been doing is I'm, I'm not forcing. I'm encouraging. Encouraging, yeah. whomever's house I am working on to come and hang out with me while I build their life. I've already built your family. Now come see as I build your life. Holden, you and Lexi are going to come and do it because you have green lizard skin. Yes.

Oh, I've, I've lurked. I've seen what you've created. I might turn Lexi into a mermaid. I just got this island living that I can turn her into a mermaid. I love it. Madley is a vampire. I love mur people. Do you get all, I bet, because you like.

washing the dishes so I would assume her people gets me going. Oh yeah, you get a swan for mermaids. Oh dude, the amount of times I fucking blast a nut to splash bro, just hard, dude. I can see that honestly. I don't know if you're kidding or not. I think Splash was maybe a part of the awakening but like I don't think I ever gave it a nut

or I didn't give them the golden nut. I think I've been waiting to ask this question my whole life. Wow, oh my God, oh this is an outbreak. What is the question? You're a safe person I can ask. When you envision fucking a mermaid. What are you envisioning, right?

I don't understand it. Right. Where's the hole? Yeah, exactly. What do you fuck? Question for Tom Cruise, perhaps. Or is it just the mermaid giving you a bead? Yeah, I think maybe it'd be like they kind of, you know, the way it's depicted a lot of times in different things is there's like, there's always more than one. And they all kind of take you and like, what was it? Hook, right? Yes. Oh, yes.

You are describing the scene in hook. Oh, yes. They take you. Yeah, that was actually, fuck splash. That mermaid part of, uh-huh, got me. So it's either going to be that. I mean, at the end of the day, there's definitely just like a pussy slit hole. Yeah, I guess.

Front on the front. Matter or I do wonder, like in Akitar, yes, I'm talking about my fairy fuck books. And yes, Natalie and I are starting to record our fairy fuckbook pod ads. My God, Jackie is plugging today. Yeah, I'm plugging it away. But in there, I, their wings are very sensitive, like, sexually sensitive. I wonder if as they get aroused,

if their tail becomes more sensitive to them and that to them there's a way that you can like rub on the fins or like glide down the scales that would also get them off. Right. So you just like hump them until they come. Yeah, it's like a wet hump. Like a wet hump.

It's a wet hump. So wait. So wait, I'm supposed to be concerned about their... I'm confused. Oh my God, read the very fuck books. You have to read the very buck books. Your wife is begging you to read the furry fuck books. Hold on a second.

But they, yeah, I just... Her coming? But penis calms. We're still laughing at you. I'm pointing at now. Whatever, I'm throwing Jackie out of the bus this week Because I want her to get the heat She thinks the royals are boring

Yes, I'm bored. I'm bored by it. Okay, so send her the messages this week. Send me the messages. We have a Zach Efron situation to dissect here. Can we talk about the scene in which William pushes Harry into a dog bowl? Dog bowl, the dog bowl incident. I kept thinking about Zach Efron running past the glass fountain and slipping on a sock.

I'm just like, where is the dog bowl? How big is the dog bowl? So here, just so everyone knows, I have been being driven slowly mad every single day this week because I read celebrity gossip every single day. And what has been on the celebrity gossip docket every single day this past week, it is nothing but the secrets, quote unquote, that are being quote unquote leaked from Prince Harry's memoir that is coming out this Tuesday,

Tuesday of this week, so it's already out by the time this episode's out, called Spare, and the salacious details that have come from the memoir. This fucking, his dick almost fell off, Jackie.

I know, he would always, come on. We're going to talk about the fun points. His wiener almost broke a, like an ice sculpture during his own brother's wedding. I mean, how can you not? And all he needed was a warm mouth.

to get the blood flowing. I just need someone. How do I get someone to get me more? You guys remember, if you can go back to Kate Middleton and Prince Williams' wedding, I was all aboard. MJ and I both. We've both, I watched all of Wattamary Harry. Yes, that's the thing I remember about you. You brought up the royals the most often.

The most, I did. OG, page seven. I wanted to have sex with Prince Harry. Yeah. And that was many moons ago. Yeah, back when Harry had hair. Well, he still has some hair. He's not as rough as his brother.

Oh, yeah, that's right. I'm sorry. It's William who got, who no longer looks like his mother because he lost his hair. He's gone full Charles. Yes. Full Charles. Well, they age horrifically.

Yeah. He's the British Royals. They age just like, you know what it reminds me? It reminds me, and now I have a better relationship with sports, but it reminds me back when I was a kid. And I was like, wait, why do we? Why do I have to care about this dumb game? Yes, that's how I always felt about the Royals.

This is a part of social currency that I have to like have it. When we were kids, I'm supposed to want to marry those two people. I did want to marry Harry. Yeah, I mean, as a kid, I was just like, honestly, the most sentient feeling I had about William and Harry for most of my life was like they were about R-H and then their mom died. And so I like felt really sad. Sad for them. Yeah, it was like the first time that I could have like, it was like a famous

person dying when they weren't supposed to and they were a mom and like that was and then those kids were like exactly me and my brother's age and I was like wow this is like and then as I got older and then we got the Beanie Baby we got the Beanie Baby Beanie baby and then there was this whole charade of behavior that I felt like I was supposed to take

part in to be part of society as like a high school girl and then a young like a person in my 20s to be like oh yes how do you feel about fucking Harry you know and I was supposed to want it And we, and, you know, Jackie wanted to fuck Harry and it was fun and there was that show. And he was like in the war and apparently killing 25 people.

And we were all supposed to be invested in it. And now, ironically, I actually am having a lot of fun following the Royals discourse the last few weeks. And Jackie is the one who wants to blow her brain. It's not even that like, it doesn't make me dislike them as human beings. I'm just annoyed that there's literally nothing. else going on right now? There's so many, I mean, got Jeremy Renner in the hospital, he's doing okay, everything's fine.

Who's that? You, how dare you? He's the priestly one with the arrows. Oh, another prince. Oh, good. Bring out, bring me another prince. Got princes for days these days. One of the saddest things I will say in all of the things that I have been reading,

because even though I've been annoyed by all of this discourse, I have read all of it, that apparently Prince Harry said to his brother that was really upsetting that like when he lost his hair going back to when you're talking about losing his hair he stopped according to prince harry looking like his mother right right prince william looks like his father now yeah and that that's the biggest detriment to him losing his hair is that he doesn't like that he's lost the essence of his who thought will felt that or harry prince harry thought that about will so this was that's sad this was a scene he he depicts that was kind of a very poetic interesting it was very it was very novelish it was

was like they met at a funeral. And him and his dad and William, they all went off to the side to, like, have a final little bitch fest about, like, Harry defecting. And he said, Harry said, in that moment, he realized that William no longer looked anything like his mother and only looked,

and I think it was more of a statement of saying, like, he fully turned to the dark side and, like, lost everything that was, um, you know, all the warm things that he got from his mother, which was kind of the better.

That's very moving. That's very touching. That's very beautiful scene. But I will also say about these sorts of memoirs in general that annoys me is when it becomes very obvious that things are being left out on the other side. Because going back to that dog bowl incident, Harry said his older brother called his wife difficult, rude and abrasive during a fight at Harry's notting him cottage home on the grounds of Keynesington Palace. William then grabbed Harry by the collar and shoved him backwards into a dog food bowl. Dog food bowl every day. Always they can't leave out the fact that he shoved into a dog food bowl.

Dog food bowl. Now, that's what happened. Okay, so you want me to believe that he insulted your wife very badly and then went straight from that to grabbing you by the collar and throwing you into a dog. You must have said something else. Oh, sure. Oh, fucking sure. And, you know, I just own up to a little bit of your end of like whatever's happening

here at all. And I'll believe anything you say. But the part where you make yourself look spotless in your shit is a little like, I just, I don't, I don't buy, I just stop buying any of it, right? Yeah, it's, it's kind of how I feel. It's pretty admirable that Harry and Megan were like, oh, you want to fuck with us? Well, we will put out a Netflix show and I will run it. Tell all book and everyone's going to think work.

And the Oprah. And the Oprah interview. They have seized it back. And good for them in a way. Because obviously they totally got screwed by a very, very powerful system. And they got screwed in some pretty, like, they don't totally have a reason to feel righteous. But yeah, also, it's like, well, you people are just like very, very, very rich, very, very famous people.

And right, you're like, you're a little bit annoying too, you know. I don't like that they don't, I mean, when do they ever admit their faults ever? And that's the only thing I have to say. I do think that like fuck the royals and this is fun to watch from the sidelines with the popcorn out. It's also sad because I feel like it is in real time we're watching. We are watching. What makes me sad is two brothers. that hate each other.

So at the end of the day, Jackie does care. I do kind of care. Wow. Yes, it makes me sad. And her heart grew three times that day. Oh, wait, you know, all right, but hot day, Jackie. Oh, God, okay. Page 7 podcast said, Gima.com, go on.

Attention, Jackie. Attention, yeah, Jackie's feelings about the Royals. Go on. Is Megan Markle chaotic neutral, or is she lawful evil? I don't know. Yeah. I think that she's one of the... I think she's one of the two.

I think she bridges on lawful evil. I do. But like here's my hot take because I feel like a lot of people are pro Megan Markle. The more that I watch, the more I become like... But she's...

It seems like she's also like... Stirring the pot and doing very like manipulative things. Or at least that's what it seems like from what they are portraying. Well, again, look at how media savvy they are. She's not Princess Die, okay? Can we just say it?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's not Princess Die. And I feel like they're trying to do this. Oh, in the documentary. Oh, the documentary. Harry literally says in the documentary like, she's so much like my mummy. She's so much like, but then what's weird is it cuts to the corner of the room and

there's an actual mummy that's walking around the room. And I'm like, wait, wait, which mummy? Are you talking about Princess Die or the mummy in the room? And I couldn't make heads or tails. I think, okay, to me, the interesting thing about the, the parallels between Megan, Markle, and Diana. And we were talking about this before we started recording it. And he pointed out, like, the ways in which Megan Markle are persecuted is obviously very

specifically informed by racism from the royal family. A hundred percent. And like that, yes. And so that's very important. That's why at the end of the day, fuck them. Oh, yes. A lot of them. Because they could go fuck themselves.

Yes, totally. But I think that what's interesting about the parallels that come up in the documentary or the Netflix thing or whatever is that. Because you watched all of it. I watched all of it. And I really enjoyed it. Gideon, I dragged, Gideon kicking and screaming. I was like, we're watching this. And I think that what's interesting is that Megan Markle is, like, talented and charismatic. And a lot of people like her. Obviously, a lot of people don't like her. Also, many of those people don't like her because of racism. Some people don't like her because of suits. And then some people really love her. And they think that she's like, wow, what a breath of fresh air for the royal family. And that's what Diana was also. And the royal family, hated Diana because she was so charismatic and they were so not. And I think that that's an interesting parallel. And because she wanted to do so much good.

Totally. Like that was such, she was such a good humanitarian. To the extent that like being a figurehead and like going and shaking people's hands can do good, which I was not sold that it could until I learned more about Diana. And I was like, oh, Diana actually did do. Because at first I was like, well, fuck, why should I care about fucking rich people

shaking people's hands? But then like I learned about like Diana like going and taking pictures with people. in AIDS wards for the first, like being the first royal to ever be photographed with people with AIDS, one of the first famous people to... And what happened right after that? QE2 put the kibosh on it. There's also like,

she kept trying to do more and more good things. Right. So that's actually right, like the good things, I have now come around and think that Diana actually is a really interesting person and also like a total hot mess too and like not a saint, right? And like, I think that learning about her has actually been super

fascinating. And yeah, for the Crown and the You're Wrong About series on her, which is really good. But yeah, with Megan Markle, it's just like, okay, you do have some interesting parallels there. But also, right, the parallels might stop at, you know, she's not Diana in terms of, I don't know, I don't know, Jackie,

I want to hear you say a little bit more about why she's not Diana. Because to me, I just watched her and I was like, man, you are. No, no, no, attention. MJ, page 7 podcast at gmail.com, MJ, go on. She's a really interesting, very well-spoken person. She is so actory. Like, watching that documentary, it was just like,

she has, like, extreme actor being interviewed vibes, which I'm very sensitive to. And this is very a personal thing. I don't like someone who has peaceful face. Yes, yes. Well, you know, it's Colty.

Because you know what, that's culty, and we see that all the time in the like before the shit hits the fan part of the cult documentary. They all are like, I got the secret. I have the secret and it's this. You know what I mean? I mean, in general, I hate that when people first fall in love when they come in and they're like, you don't know. I know. I crack the code because I met this person and no one's ever felt this way before. No, no one in the history of the world has fallen in love with someone before.

But it does feel different and it does feel new. No one loves Jeff the way I love Jeff. But I wanted to ask you, I'm J, on top of that, how did you feel about the viral curtsy moment? That was the big thing from the documentary. I mean, I think it's kind of funny that she should like. You want to explain the viral curtsy moment. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You mean so at the moment, yeah, you explain it. Well, she's just talking about how, and this does seem ridiculous. They're in the limo or whatever on the way to meet the queen. And he's like, you know how to cutesy, right? You got a cutesy for the queen. Why do they all sound like John Lynn? I know. Because that's how me's

a British accent. A hundred percent. All right. I got shot in me head in an alleyway, right? Isn't it? It happened though. It's very tragic. But they're on the way and he's like,

you got a courtesy or whatever. And she's like, what? I don't know, right? M.J. Is this kind of what I? Yeah. I don't know. How to cut?

Like, okay, come on, man. If you're about to go meet the fucking. Dude, if I was about to meet the queen, I would have asked 20 million. I would ask for a dossier. How did you not talk about this? Like, how do you not talk about the fucking. Yeah. That just, that doesn't, that's not corky and cute to me.

That's idiot. That just says idiot to me. I just, you know what I mean? Or lazy or disrespectful. What did you think would happen when you started dating the prince of, like, of course you're going to meet the queen. You're going to, yeah, I agree. Prepare, okay.

They've been together for months. I mean, even the night before, just to be like, what's the play-by-play? What's, because it's, of course, you mean the queen, there's going to be a bunch of little rules and things. Yeah, of course, and people have hilariously violate people. There's also, was it, was it, uh, I feel like it was maybe Michelle Obama or somebody, some other really beloved person also, like, touched the queen when they weren't supposed to. I'll figure it out who it was.

Right. But there's all sorts of funny, high-profile times people have accidentally not done what you're supposed to around the queen. So, Megamarkle, you should anticipate. and Harry, help your wife, talk about this. Oh, you're going to meet my grandmother. She happens to be the queen of England. Our entire family is based on a system of archaic rules that nobody understands. But I understand them.

Let me explain them to you. And he does. You also were right, by the way, Michelle Obama put her arm around Queen Elizabeth at Buckingham Palace. Oh, wow. But of course, everyone loves Michelle Obama. So everybody was like, this is cute. I'm great. Is not the prince's wife to be.

Right. You're the prince. You know what I mean? I mean, that's the crazy thing. But anyways, there's this moment where she's like showing how she like biffed this Curtsy and everyone speculates over like the look on Harry's face as she's doing this. I'm like, oh man, did I fuck up? I might have fucked up.

She does a big like mock curtsy. And yeah, the look on Harry's face is like, wow, you are mocking my entire family and my entire culture. That's what kind of people were reading of the look on his face. I don't know. I actually thought that was the most, her most charming moment of the whole thing. documentary. Like when she's being like, she's being really funny. Like, I do think Megan Markle is like a very funny, very charismatic person. I just don't think that she's like, I just don't really like worship the ground she walks on. And so I think that her doing that curtsey is really funny. But if it hurts his

feelings, I don't know. It's a tough line to walk for her because obviously if I was dating Harry, I would be like, your family fucking sucks and they're murderers and we should we should dismantle them. And so if she doesn't have respect for their institutions, like, that's fine. She doesn't really need to have respect for their institutions. But also, if that's going to hurt her husband's feelings, like she should care about his feelings. And I will say, to Harry's credit, he seems like a guy who is trying so hard to, like, be a good person and be a good man. And he talks about, like, his anti-racist awakenings and his own personal kind of, like, political education. He's obviously trying really hard to be a person on an individual level who is not.

perpetuating the evils that his family has done. Yeah, we're all breaking cycles here, I feel like a lot. You know what I mean? Cycle breaker, absolutely. And, you know, yeah, I only watched the first episode, but yeah, his, like, journey to Africa and all. I didn't know about any of that stuff. And I certainly didn't know that his penis almost fell off.

Pneas almost fell off at his brother's wedding. But then again, this has been one of the biggest headlines is that Prince Harry's toadja. What a weird book. His tawjure had. had frostbite during the wedding between Prince William and Kate Middleton. And that is the headline. But how did he get a frostbitten penis?

You hear this and you're like, oh, was you just hammered and fell asleep in the snow? Right. But he didn't. He was actually on a charity expedition to the North Pole where he'd walked 200 miles across Arctic landscape alongside fellow soldiers who'd served in Afghanistan. and a lot of them had frostbite and Harry's ears, cheeks, and penis got frostbitten. And the frostbite was so bad on his penis that it took so long to recover that it was still frostbitten by the time he had to go and do this like big, big ordeal in front of everybody. And I just feel like it's sad that it's just like, his dodger was all cold.

This is a perfect. All right. And by the way, the other reveal that we got that no one's talking about is how he admitted he had 25 confirmed kills in Afghanistan. Yeah. Is really neutral about it and liken the whole thing to a chess match. Yeah. And no one's talking about how human list.

Can we talk about or can we just talk about PTSD? Can there be a conversation about PTSD and how people that go to war, like how you have to mentally deal with what you've done that, like, Don't you have to talk about it like that? I would assume, I don't know. Frostbitten penis and we're good. The 25 kills thing is rough. The 25 kills should have been left out.

You think it should have been left out? To be a little bit cavalier about your 25 kills is rough. Especially because he joined the military to be like, I'm just a regular every day. Brit like the rest of you, blokes, who are forced to join the military for economic circumstances. Aren't they forced to, though? Because William also served, aren't they, not forced,

but aren't they like? I'm sure they're heavily... Yes. Yes, I'm sure... Because they wear all those medals. And so they have to pretend... Instead of just being pretend war guys, they have to go and be real war. But I think that would hear you...

He was like everyone was so proud of him because he went to be a real war guy. Like, I don't think that the royals typically are like really actually in common. Well, he's the spare. So it doesn't matter quite as much. So they have to protect William a lot more, I imagine. Yeah, talk about social currency.

I mean, the point system that goes, on with the Royals. If you don't do anything they ask you do, that just like goes on your little demarital. I wouldn't be shocked if they had an actual point system. You know what I mean? I'm sure that there is. Everything's about being in good standing with it. It's crazy because I feel like I'm working on this kind of stuff in

therapy and this is like that times a hundred. Like, trying to do everything pitch perfect to hit the mark to get your gold star for the day and, you know, level up in the world or whatever. And I'm trying to like break free of that kind of mentality. And that's exactly what this is. And there are certain ways you want to break free, which is why, if you want to ask why I wanted to have sex with Prince Harry, how did he lose his virginity? We find out in the memoir. He was on a bunch of shrooms and banged an older woman in a field behind a bar. This is another clarification. We have not yet decided what exactly happened with this fucking dog bowl. And I need another visual clarification. A field behind a bar. Could you get more British than that? The bar is out in the fucking.

Highlands or something? Like what bar has a field behind it? Right. I say this is somebody who comes from a farm town. Like, what bar was it? Like, I want to know more. I want to know more about the dog. Wait, was it glass? You come from a farming town. So does that mean, have you had sex in a field or do you not, you also don't have to answer that question if you don't feel comfortable? I have not, my, okay, I did come from a farming town, but all the bars weren't by the farms. The bars were downtown. Oh, they're downtown with the other buildings. And I have also been to Europe, but I know. No, there are, I've definitely drank in bars that were in fields.

So I guess I can check my outrage about this. It's possible he was just at some country bar in a field, but I want more information. Am I going to have to read Spare just so I can find out how he managed to get pushed into a dog bowl so bad that his back, he wasn't going to tell Megan about the fact that Will pushed him, but his back was so damaged by the dog bowl. He was so covered in bruises.

So obviously it wasn't a plastic ball. think it was a glass bowl either, though. I think it was somewhere I'm into it was like a clay bowl, let's say, a delicate, maybe even fine china style bowl, like, right, that would break pretty easily and cause a lot of fractures. I mean, definitely. I've got six cat bowls in my house right now, and I cannot imagine a scenario in which somebody pushes me and I fall backwards into the bowls. And then you're covered in bruises. I just don't understand it. But I don't know. I can tell that the guy is trying to do his best. And I think that I, If I have to pick a team between Team Harry and Team Megan,

I mean, Team Harry and Team Megan versus Team Royal Family, you obviously got to pick Harry and Megan. Yeah, but it's like the, it's like a two-party system. Yes, you know what I mean? Yes, it's really... I think that's the problem here. And why do we... Why does anybody have to pick anything?

Like I said, I got the popcorn out. I don't have any skin in this fucking game. But I wanted to watch the documentary literally because I do this show. So, and I only have watched the first... the first episode, like, Lexi has much more of a general interest in the Royals for sure than me. But I will say this, it's a well-made documentary. Yeah. And so that's what keeps me going with the dog.

Well, they've got all the money to go into it. Yeah, yeah. It's definitely like the, it's a very, very well-made documentary. In contrast to like the fucking, oh, what's her, oh, God, never mind. I came and think of her name. What's her name? Miss Cleo documentary was like this dirge. I shut it off.

It was so bad. Shut it off. Listen to fraudsters. I can't believe I betrayed fraudsters by even starting the dog. If you want to find out about Ms. Clio, listen to the fraudsters episode. Do not save your time. Don't watch the documentary. It was just so poorly made even if the information was good.

It was so bad. We're going to talk about this more on Talking TV. Yeah, we will. Check out Talking TV over on our Patreon. Hey, plug it up. Yeah, we are plugging it up. Speaking of plugging. Oh, yeah, what's next?

Alec Baldwin. Oh, my God. He is. A family drama that I can't look away from. I know. Confessional video that Alec Baldwin post to his Instagram looks like a hostage video. Yes. He is being kept a hostage by Helaria.

Just so everyone knows, Alec Baldwin has been asking his fans to follow his wife, Eladia, on Instagram. And he's been begging his fans because he wanted her to get to one million. I mean, she wanted to get to one million followers on Instagram by her 39 birthday. Can we also just pause? She's 39?

She's 39? Wow. Wow. She's younger than me? That is so crazy. She is 39 years old. With seven kids. She's a peer of ours.

And Alec Baldwin, and it looks like they are hostage videos. You are so right, MJ. And he's just like, yeah. Kids downstate. He keeps wrapping his face. Yeah. So tired. His hair is all messed up.

It's a very dark room. This is what I was trying to say. I think I mentioned this last time on the show that like, it doesn't matter how much money you have. When you get to seven plus kids, it's over. You're never not, it's just exhausting. There's no way to not be constantly exhausted. He's so tired.

He's so miserable. Now is why I loved that other video he made where he was like, he used to go to the uproad, Broadway shows. Those things are behind me now. And this one, yeah, and in this one he's like, it's her birthday. We're going to have cake with their kids. Our many, many, many kids.

He says many three times to describe his own kids. It's so funny. You guys have to watch this. He's so miserable. I mean, you know. He truly. this much and something, but whatever. You've, you chose this.

We can make fun of Alec Baldwin. If there is a celebrity, we can make fun of through and through. It is murderer Alec Baldwin, no matter what, because of all, whatever lawsuit that I see that he just keeps vesting them because he's got the money,

it is atrocious. Right, right, right. I should call the murderer. It was a mistake, but still, I'm still mad about it. You're fine. We've talked about how fun it is to read the comments on like celebrity gossip.

articles and I had a great time reading the comments on Alec Baldwin's Instagram post. Oh, yeah. One of which is hashtag don't kill her. One of which is give it a rest, who cares how her followers needs or has. There's more to life than social media. Go live your life to the fullest. And then one is just love the whole family. Thank you.

It's just like I love the whole family. I'm so, and what is wrong with people? Seriously, I would be so ashamed to ask something like that. I love the idea of people watching Alec Baldwin's social media videos and being like, you know what? I have something to say about this. And it's either that I love you and your family or that you are a killer and you are. Yeah.

So it's extreme. It's so extreme. You didn't pick out any of the comments where they just rip apart Hilaria. Yeah. And her. Hey, Hillary. Hi, Hillary. I love other.

I was like, hey, Hillary. What's up? I know your fucking name's Hillary. I know it's fucking. I know one of the comments It's just as Cringes in fake Spanish With asteris over it

Another one says Does Eladia magically become Actually Spanish At 1 million followers? Love it, love it, love it, love it. And yes, just Like at the end of every video Would you do that for me?

What do you follow my wife? I know she's like, hey He can't bring you my back to She's like, please. Again, God willing, please follow her. It's a lot video too. I forgot to get her a birthday They gave a gift so... So long.

So long. Their nine-year-old daughter saying, follow my mom and Instagram, please. And thank you. Oh. Why? I just, I know how awful. Yeah, she's going to be a Jeanette McCurdy situation, I think,

in a few years from now with her kids. Why do I get the feeling that that's going to happen? Because of kids, man. There's just so many of them. And I resonate too so much with like, I've totally kind of been there. where Alec Baldwin's bit in the early days. I found myself in a dark room thinking,

I used to go to the opera. Yeah, yeah. Like the first few months of winning, you know what I mean? You're like, so when I watch him in that state, I'm just like, ah. It's like so funny. It's like it's so true. But it's like, yeah.

How old is their youngest, their youngest baby's still like a baby, right? Baby, they had this year, I'm pretty sure. So exhausting, dude. Yeah, that's the thing. He'd be riding sitting pretty with three, but once you surpass like five, I think even once you go past four,

it doesn't matter how many millions of dollars you have, you're still going to accidentally murder somebody on a film set. You know what I mean? That's too many kids to not accidentally kill somebody. It's too many. It's just very scary. He's tired all the time. Of course he didn't check the gun.

Well, I don't know. I want to know how much staff he has. in his house. He has to have people that rich. He'llada must have a night nurse, right? Must have a multiple night nurses, multiple daytime nannies. And so I'm not saying I agree with you, Holden. At some point, you are the parent

no matter how rich you are. It doesn't matter, dude. Yeah, but at the same time, I remember when I was a nanny, the kids used to hang out with a family that were so rich that they had six kids and every child had their own nanny. They had their own sports like professional sports person. They had their own like different language teachers for each kid.

So don't feel that bad for them. No, I know, but I can just tell that like it still does, you know, you just see him in these videos. Maybe he's just beaten down by his own marriage, but I firmly feel that it is actually like, it's just, they're banging to, it doesn't matter, man, they're going to bang down your door in the morning. They're going to fuck every day you're going to, something's happening. Yeah, something's happening to make him very miserable.

He is a man. As Jackie Senator, you know, if you want to see a beaten down man. Yeah. Also, it's such a boomer thing, too, to, like, post, like, a video like that

in your, like, in your, you know, not as, in your feet as opposed to a story. Like, I post of myself talking as stories all the time. Sure. To just make a post that just you, like, I'm in a dark room.

Yeah, just in a dark room, no effort made. And he's Christian male Batman, all of a sudden. He really does. He looks so tired. The rings on her, the lines on her,

eyes, everything. It's just, he's so unshowered. Like, they're gonna go out to dinner, like, or maybe wait till you're about to go out and you're all, you know what I mean? But it just, that's why it feels very, like, it feels very forced. Like, you better go upstairs,

you better film it right now. I asked you to do it two weeks ago. Yes. I need a million followers. My empire of, you know, of my lifestyle empires, crumbling before my very eyes. You know what pisses me off the fucking mess?

I went to her old. Oh, no, but. No, actually, whatever with that. But I will say, I went to her profile A million followers. Oh, yeah, she hit it. Oh, yeah, man. So annoyed, man.

I kind of, I was hoping, you know, there's always the possibility that a video like that is so lame that actually gets people to unfollow her a lot. So I was hopeful. You'd think that. But she hit one million. So if you're following her out of like a joke,

like unfollow her, please. This is my page seven campaign. Oh, you know, page seven. Her podcast is so boring. Her podcast is so boring. She doesn't deserve anything that she has. Adios Helaria. Yeah, Adios Helaria.

Yeah, but what we should, the page seven campaign should be to write the crime against humanity that was leaving Celine Dion off of the 200 greatest singers of all times Rolling Stones list. Yeah. There are people actually protesting

outside of Rolling Stone because 54-year-old legend. Celine Dionne is not included on the 200 greatest singers of all time Rolling Stones list and that is just I maybe has something to do with her stiff person syndrome that she's going through right now

that people are so like feel the need to back her so hard and I love Celine Dion she's only 54? She's 54 man Van everybody is young today Yeah dude 54 she's been well she's been famous for our entire lives

She's been famous since she was young since we were very young. I would have guessed that she was in her 60s, though. I can't believe she's only 54. She has real, like, both Helodia and Celine Dion seem much older than they are. I know. Age is completely lost on me now. I don't know who's younger, who's older. I'm, I still feel, because I still look.

I forget, I'm like, oh, yeah, British Spears is, like, two years younger than me. Oh, yeah, dude. You know what I mean? I started season two of White Lotus last night, And I was like, Christopher Maltesanti is that old? And then I had to think about how long ago the Sopranos was made. Can we talk about how hot Michael Imperioli looks in the new White Lotus season? Yeah, I agree.

Bro can get it, man. Yeah, I'd fucking get his dick, Frost. I even said I'd kiss on F. Murray Abraham. And Jeff looked to me like, really? And he's like, it's the character. It's the character. Well, he just kills it in the show. God damn it.

That season is so good. That and also I've been watching Mythic Quest. And F. Mary Abraham is also in Mythic Quest and he kills it in that show too. We're having an F. Murray Abraham Asson's over here. Wow. So relevant. So hip, what's going on.

I, you know, I will say with Rolling Stone, they did have a caveat in there. T. Swift made the list, by the way. Wow. They did have a caveat on there. It's not best vocals. We actually were having a discussion about this recently about how, like, technical prowess is not necessarily like the number one thing people look for in a singer. Because I would say with Taylor Swift, very, very good performer. I really, I mean, we were just listening to Midnights on the way here.

I really enjoy Taylor Swift. I don't know if I would call her one of the greatest singers technically. Yeah, because she's not really a singer. She's a singer-songwriter. It's different, but like she's not like a, like, I just keep thinking of. Celine Dion. Right. I keep thinking of Aretha Franklin when they're naming different singers.

I know right. That's a Taylor Swift and she's like, beautiful gowns, beautiful gowns. Beautiful gowns. I'm not going to argue with you on that. I mean, the one caveat here is Rolling Stone was like, we didn't say best voice. We said best singer. And I'm sure Bob Dylan's on that list, right? Right.

I'm going to assume, I meant to look up the whole list. I'm going to go ahead and do that while we chat about it. The publication added that originality influenced the depth of an artist's catalog and the breadth of their musical legacy also factor into their decisions. So that does make sense because, yes, Taylor Swift is prolific. And every person knows about Taylor Swift. She's one of the biggest pop stars of all time. That's for damn sure. Yeah.

It's crazy that I agree it's kind of nuts that she's not on this list, especially if you're going to put, as I'm scrolling through it's like, oh, they're only going to go with like cool ones then, like Bob Dylan or whatever, like ones that are like, but Kelly Clarkson's on this list. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like Celine Dion's not up there with Kelly Clarkson. Like, you know, some.

are like, I totally, yeah, like Frank Ocean, totally. And I don't even recognize some of the names on this list. It really feels, it's such a snub, man. I'm trying to argue around it, but it's like so hard with, you know, she has incredible technical prowess. But then also these like epic songs, I want to, was no one else snub to? That's why I'm like trying to quickly scroll, but it's 200 people. That's the other part too.

It's 200 people. You didn't put her on there? Yeah, she should be on there. No, this is a big snub. This is a big snub. It feels like it was an accident. It's a big snub, but it's also a dumb list. It's a Rolling Stone list.

Nothing, you know what I mean? Like, the relevance of Rolling Stone can deeply be argued at this point in 2023. You know what I mean? They definitely stood for one thing and were like the cultural touchstone of rock and roll music at a certain point decades ago. but like now you kind of have to take anything they put out there with like a grain of salt. Or at least to be like an online list that has 200 people on it.

It's not like I don't even, I can't even think of what the equivalent would be because there's every, as we talk about a lot, culture, pop culture is so diversified now that there's not even like one thing that really matters. Like the Oscars of who's the best singer of all time. It's just like, oh, this is a, I mean, Rolling Stone is still like. I think a, you know, renowned and respected name and music industry stuff. But the idea that Rolling Stone made a list of 200 people and that because Leon is that on it,

you are going to go physically protest outside the Rolling Stone office. Right. It's an absolute delight to me. Even though. And to their credit, they're like, we're the friendliest protest group ever. It's kind of a joke.

You're just singing. It's all coming back to me now. Yeah. They're having fun. Honestly, I wish I could go. Yeah. Yeah. Like, yes.

Exactly. It's a crime against humanity. They're definitely not trying to be like, this is one of the most important issues facing our country. You know what I mean? They're not like taking themselves at all seriously. So I think that's just kind of fun. But I definitely think they have a point.

I mean, it's 200 people. It's 200 people. And, you know, it's a varying technical talent, right? I don't know. It's very strange. And also all across all age groups, too. Like Billy Eilish is on the list. Yeah.

And Celine Dion isn't? Yeah. And if we're talking about singers, again, it's different if we're talking about stars or singers. You could say she's not in the top 200 stars because she has a specific thing she does. But if you're talking about singers, she is a singer. Arguably more than Billy Eilish is a singer. Come at me. Page 7 podcast at G.

I'm reading the T. Swift's blurb. So yeah, she made a hundred and second. She beat. Is it a ranking, ranking, though? I don't know. I think it might be. I did look up the top 10 that they included. Top 10, Al Green, Otis Redding, Beyonce, Stevie Wonder, Ray Charles, Mariah Carey, Billy Holiday, Sam Cook, Whitney Houston, and Aretha Franklin at number one.

Okay, so that feels ranked. I'm sorry, this list is too broad. It's all over the place. It's very tall. It's even rolling stone. It's jarring. Like, what are we talking about here? It's Rolling Stone, man. there's no, they don't know what's going on. You know what I mean? It's just like, at this point, just like name it, name an artist.

You know, let's make a list of all the artists we can name, you know. Right. What's funny to, yeah, reminds me of all those like comedians lists that we had to endure when like the, you know, blogging craze happened or whatever. Oh, they still make those lists. I know. At one point, it was like so over the top. There was like lists of lists of lists of the top hot new comics in Detroit or whatever

the fuck it was. Yeah, but, but yeah, it is funny. I think what's funny is, as I scroll, I don't think anyone else got snuffed. That's why they have such a point. Because I was trying to think, like, is, you know, Barbara Streisand on this list? Oh, yeah, she's on the list. Is Gilda Radner on, or not Gilda Radner, who am I thinking, Hocus Pocus? Is she on the list?

Is Biddler? Is Bette on here? I don't know. If Bette's not on here, then I feel like Rolling Stone actually has more of a case they can make about, like, what they're going for. Midler protest if she's not out there except I won't do that because Badd Butler has questionable politics questionable politics

Ah yes Turfee turfy turf Turf turf turf turf Yeah she's on it Wow yeah No one God Seleney has not even a turf

Except for Celine If I could think of one other singer That's not on this list That should be Then damn Then maybe we could have a different discussion but actually, I think I'm team what the fuck on that. Because there's a bunch of people too I've never heard of.

People that are upset. Demi Lovato is not on the list. People are upset. Olivia Newton, John is not on the list. Okay, so there are a couple more snubs on there. But you do have like Billy Elish is on the list. A lot of people angry that Beyonce is in the top ten. Oh, angry that she is in the top?

She has incredible vocal prowess. Someone is angry that James Taylor is on the list. Well, everyone's angry about it. If there's anything I've learned lately, everything's angry. Everyone's angry about everything. Everybody's angry about everything. There's no pleasing anyone, okay? It's 2020-3 is the year-long Christmas.

It's year-long holiday at home. So I want to buy these shoes. Oh, my God, we're way over time. Let's get into the celebrity conspiracy. Hit me with the share. But I was singing Christmas shoes. Uh-oh. Do you believe it?

Is Jean-Cook from BTS, the reincarnation of Princess Diana? Ooh. Oh. I've heard that. How about I have heard about this one? Give it to us. This one comes in from Stephen who writes another day,

another conspiracy theory from TikTok, and I think you might like it. I think we will like it. Is Jean Cook from the K-pop sensation, BTS, the reincarnation of Princess Diana? The evidence is as follows. This is according to Twitter, TikTok, and other random news articles

that Stephen found. Here's the biggest, largest piece of evidence. There's an unbelievable amount of at least attempts in evidence out there online. My eyes glazed ever scrolling through it. Princess Diana died on August 31, 1997. Shankook was born the next day. Whoa.

Oh, my God. I've heard enough. September 1st, 1997. Both were born on the first of their birth months, July 1st and September 1st, and both in the Chinese year of the ox. Okay. 1961 and 1997. Jean-Cook's astrological chart says he was a royal in a past life. He also has a tattoo of a crown on his finger.

Ooh. They both are the same height, 5'10. Junkuk is afraid of microwaves, and guess fucking what? Diana once nearly set Kensington Palace on fire with a you-guessed it microwave. Whoa. Seriously, dude, you're afraid of microwaves? Yeah, you know, everybody's got weird fears. How do you live?

Anyways, I guess you just make it yourself. We don't know a microwave because my father-in-law is also afraid of microwaves, and so Gideon never had one. Wow. Is it like a radio waves kind of thing? Not radio waves. It's like a tin hat type of thing, like conspiracy type of thing? Oh, yeah.

Yeah, 100%. Also, a fan alleged that philosophers, quote, philosophers theorized every 25 years, the reincarnation, the reincarnated person has a seven-day window. of consciousness to fulfill their old dream slash desires, a.k.a. Diana and Junkuk, I guess, is responsible for the queen's death. Exactly seven days after Junkook's birthday. Whoa.

That one's a bit of a stretch. Well, none of these are stretches. I think the tattoo of the crown, wow. Steven said, I put the most compelling evidence above, but there's a whole lot more you can find with a simple Google search, including their participation in charity work, their shared enjoyment of doing laundry, and their similar, quote, bunny smiles.

They do have bunny smiles. They both have bunny smiles. Yeah, Stephen then linked to a wild and extensive Twitter thread full of, I mean, it's just unbelievable. How much there is. Happy holidays you all. May your Christmas shoes fit just right. Bit of a belated happy holidays, but we appreciate. And actually, you just sang fucking Christmas shoes.

Yeah. So you're reincarnated? I am reincarnated as Princess Die. Not Megan Markle, lawful evil. Yeah. Megan Snarkle. What is it with the seven, though? Because then I see this tweet that's like, yeah,

and South Korea is seven hours ahead of Paris, France. And like, I don't know what that means. And everyone's like, there's the seven again. She died in Paris. There's a lot of sevens in the, once people stick to a number, you know, it becomes mania. I'm sorry, it becomes like this connective tissue of the universe. Not some sort of dark mental trap.

people are falling into with numerology. I do recommend just doing a Google image search if you don't want to go deep on the Twitter thread because there is just a number of just hilarious images of like her face blending into Zhanguk's face. It is very, very fun to look at. So I'm going to say, I believe.

And I'm going to say shout out to BTS, dude. Fucking awesome, bro. We listen to a ton of K-pop actually on our road trips together because Jake Young was at the wheel. Yeah, when we were on tour for the release the butthole. Plug it, Jackie, plugging it down. Jackie Zabrowski. There you go.

San Francisco this Friday. You've got L.A. on Sunday. And then in two weeks, you've got Dallas and Austin. So please get your tickets right now. Last Podcast Network.com. Dude, this show is fire, bro. I literally get set on fire in the middle of it. And everyone screams and everyone laughs.

I am bringing my bucket hat. I'm going to keep the vibes going. It's going to be a totally different. show. I know, I know, man. Bucking had

Jack is just going to be off the chain. I cannot wait for you to feel the vibes that just by sitting in the room with her right now, dude, it's like so heavy.

If you saw the first leg of the tour, the 2020 leg of the tour and you can afford to fly out to California or Texas to see the new show with Jackie wearing a bucket hat. It will be a completely different show.

That was BBC, and I'm not talking about that. What? I'm talking about, oh, big, before bucket. Oh, no, it's big before bucket. That's BBA. Or Christ.

Or Christ or Christ or something in between, dude. Good Lord. Oh, my God, they're big. Those cocks. It's time for the list. Oh, who's on the list? Maybe you gotta have that list. 15 celebrities who tried something new.

God bless him. Oh, cracked. I didn't know that Robert Downey Jr. tried adult contemporary music. Iron Man completely revived his career, but during the slump, he released an adult. adult contemporary album called The Futurist. And I do like the cover of it.

And I love that just the freight, the fact that it is referred to as adult contemporary music twice. Says it all. Says it all. It does make me want to seek it out. Now, this one I thought might hurt your feelings holding. Taylor Swift tried acting. That's a little mean.

I don't think she's that bad. How old's this list? Oh, okay, Katz is on it. Or not in Katz. You can't tell if anyone's a good actor. Katty. I think it was unwatchable. I mean, and I saw her in Amsterdam. She was fine, but she was barely in it. I think actually

it's going to be more damning if she tried directing. I think that's what she really wants to do is get into directing. Well, she's been directing her music videos, right? But she's about to direct a feature. That was the big news, right? She's about a direct a feature. I think that'll be more of a, like, if that fails, that'll be much worse than, like, her being in

cats or whatever. I don't think I've seen her gotten a chance to see her chops enough just yet. You know, I need to see her do something like Janelle Monet did. What did you say? Is it her pork chops? Oh, right, please. I used to go to the opera.

Every time you make me sad, I'm just going to say that. I used to go to the opera. I want to see her do something like what Janelle Monet did in glass onion. Dude, she was so. Wow. She's got some jelly on them jobs. You got to see her in a roll. that to convince me that she's got, you know, the acting pork chops.

But I think she wants to do directing more anyways. I think she was doing acting just to, like, be on a film set and, like, see how it works. You know what I mean? How the sausage is made for the pork chops. She's just so brilliant. Wow, we're doing sausage and pork chops. Wow, it's a lot of pork. It's a porky day.

My God. Be careful. Give me my porky hat. That's a big meal, start calling my porky hat. But you're not going to get a big meal over. over at Stephen Spielberg's restaurants, because Spielberg, the highest grossing director of all time, opened two locations of Dive,

which was a submarine-themed sub-sandwich restaurant. The overpriced mediocre food saw them close within a few years. Oh, man, I would totally eat it. Oh, now I want to sub. But I do like the, I kind of love the idea of a submarine-themed sub-sandwich shop. Totally. Yeah. Nobody else did.

Totally. Nobody else also wanted Natalie Portman's vegan footwear because Portman partnered with a shoe boutique take a saw. And they launched in February and by November the company had folded. This is something I didn't know that Mick Jagger also acted in a film. For his title role in the 1970 film Ned Kelly, director Tony Richardson said Jagger was as good as having a stillborn child. Jesus, Tony Richardson, ton it down.

For God's sake. I just, what a mean thing to say. Horrific, just a needlessly, how horrible thing to say. Yeah, terrifying image, all of this. I'm just upsetting on every level. Jesus, Tony Richardson. Uh-huh. But I don't know if your penis knew about this.

I don't know if your penis would like this, Holden. Scarlett Johansson released an album of mostly Tom Waits covers. Yeah, I think she released a couple of albums. I've never gone to listen to them, but of course she never got the same like Zoe Deschanel like level of, you know, but I think that's what she wanted. I was probably right around the time of that too. I was like, oh, we can make these little... It was in 2008.

Yeah, we can make these cute little albums. I loved she, when she and him came out, like, I loved that. So it was totally... And it's just so funny because with Natalie Portman, all I can think of is Katie Perry. So it really is like... Stinky shoes. Again, it really does show that like you can't just be a celebrity and like have a successful side business.

Like, there are people who succeed at that and there are people who absolutely do not succeed at that. Yeah. Which is kind of funny to think about because you just assume you're like, of course Zoe, of course you were able to just like make a hit album. You know what I mean? Or whatever. But not just anybody can do it. Yeah.

A pitch for her critics said about the album, the only thing we've learned is that she really, really likes Tom Waits. But the thing with me is like... That's so her doing that to me, unlike Hilaria's podcast, her doing this is just genuinely like, she just wanted to make a record of Tom Wade's covers. I don't think she, you know, if I got to this point, I would do tons of stuff like that. Oh yeah, because why not? It's more of the people like, what's his name, Bad Sanna or whatever, when he like wouldn't

when Billy Bob Thornton was like, there's this radio interview where he's like, apparently stated before him, like, you're not allowed to ask me any questions about my like the obvious thing about me, my amazingly successful acting career and celebrity, were only allowed to talk about my band. And in the very beginning of the interview, he just mentions that Billy Bob Thornton is like a actor, successful actor. And so for the rest of the interview, he's such a dick to this interviewer. And the interviewer handles it really well.

Go watch this clip. It's like, it's very cringy. But it's like, that's the annoying shit with celebrities when they're like, um, you know, they use all of their status to like get on the radio show. whatever, and then it's like, you're not allowed to talk about the whole reason why I got on this radio show, essentially, because no one actually cares about your fucking band, Billy.

Yeah. Next. Next. Well, you know, talking about actresses that are trying to do other things, and sometimes you fail and sometimes you're successful, Blake lively. Apparently, now we know she's very successful running a whole, like,

home-style goods, and she has like this, like, Betty Buzz, which is any drinks, and she's got a bunch of other stokes in the fire. But apparently in 2014, lively launched Preserve, an e-commerce site specializing in handmade artisan crafts.

And it was shut down in 2015 after, quote, not making a difference in people's lives in a meaningful way. But, I mean, sometimes you start things and sometimes they fold. And sometimes there's a reason why they fold. Maybe Tom Hardy wasn't that good at being a rap artist.

because apparently he has a ton of unreleased rap songs. Again, that's commendable. He's just passionate about it and he enjoys it and he's not trying to be like, I'm Tom Hardy, so I'm just going to have a successful rap career. You know what you mean or whatever? No, he actually started at the age of 14. He rapped as Tommy number one

and was repped by Lauren Hill's manager. He said, I've recorded loads of stuff, but it's never been released. Apparently, they were shared on Reddit but pulled right away and hip hop heads said he was pretty good. Cool. I believe it. I mean, think about, I feel like back in the day it was like expected that actors,

certainly not surprising that actors also had musical talent because a lot of times they were trained in everything or they were expected to be able to sing or dance or whatever. And so when I see like a celebrity who actually, especially an actor who also is good at music, for some reason, that seems like an easier transition than to be a singer who's also an actor. I'm not, I'm not sure why that map works better one way than the other. but I'm like not at all surprised that when an actor is good at music and yet when a singer tries to be an actor

I'm just like, stay in your lane, come on now, you know? Yeah, it really depends on the person or if they try to just become a different singer if they're a singer. Like, what, I feel like we don't, if it, if this had happened during the age of social media, this would have gone very differently. When Chris Gaines, I can't believe he's on this,

but I can't believe he's on this list. Talking about Garth Brooks's, Garth Brooks's alter ego, Chris Gaines, who was an awse rock star alter ego that released an album in 1999. I remember this happening. I remember being confused when I was 12. And as a 35-year-old, I'm still confused. I remember pop history just on Chris Gaines because this was such an interesting phenomenon. I learned about it all via SNL making fun of him, but you're so right.

If this had happened in the age of Twitter, it would have lasted for about 10 seconds before it was just shut down. Just destroyed, and it happened for a while. I don't know if he actually put on shows as Chris Gaines. I would love, I would actually like to look into this because I'm so, I'm so intrigued by who thought this was a good idea. Well, for other people, it's worked, but maybe that's because they like owned it more as this isn't another identity, but fully, but like an artistic move I'm making. But, you know, Sasha Fierce. Sure, as like a different, and yes, I do understand that. What I guess I don't understand is why is he Australian?

Like what I don't understand is why he... Oh, it's so weird. He's got the dark swoopy, Ebo hair. And I, maybe it is more rock and roll. And that's why he has swoopy hair in 1999. I never really looked that far into it. I think it's how hard he leaned into what he leaned into, which is why it's weird as opposed to being like,

this is my concept album where I'm this alter ego, Sasha Fierce. This was a lot more like, no, no, no, I am Chris Gaines. Yes. It was so sincere. I think that was the, it was just like, it read as just like, what if I just come out as this new man? And everyone was like, what? What? Well, especially for him, he makes such down the line country, such like middle of the road,

incredibly popular country music. And then to go be like, now I'm this. evil guy like I'm a bad man and so funny he looked so clearly he didn't look like a man with that haircut he looked like Garth book Brooks dressed in a Halloween costume like I bring up I reference this constantly but the in 2003 when they put out this in this like list of images of Saddam Hussein in potential disguises and it's so funny because it's just Saddam Hussein like wearing a hat Saddam Hussein with a big mustache yeah Saddam Hussein with sunglasses on and like I really feel

like the Garth Brooks Chris Gaines thing is just like Garth Brooks puts on a wig. He died as hard your wig. Yeah. You know what I want to see. I want to see a politician do this. I want to see a politician to show up to Congress one day and be like, I've no longer Bill Robertson.

This is my alter ego now. I'm Spike Lord or whatever. That would be fun. Yeah. It's like the politician who just totally lied his way into office in New York. He just like totally lied about who he is. It would be really fun to do it to not lie about who you are, get elected and then go and be like, actually, I also sometimes like to cause a.

play as this man named Chris Gaines. And I wear a fake. And he comes out but he looks like Chris Angel. He walks into the room. Everyone's like, oh, God, we got to totally change our They have like two different ways to like argue him over policy depending on who he walks in as.

And last but not least, Alyssa Milano, which I did not know, is a pop star in Japan. Oh, cool. I love these little stories. Beginning in 1989, Milano released four commercially successful albums in Japan when asked why she didn't release any America. She said you didn't want to be laughed at. Yeah, it's like my favorite thing with

the Baywatch guy that he just became like a fucking massive star in like what, Italy or Germany or whatever. David Hasselsoff. Like how he just had this hugely successful career, but just in a totally other country is, I love those kinds of stories. That's so fun. Yeah, dude. No one gives a fuck about his music. I'm actually surprised he's not on this list, but I guess it's because he did end up... Jump in my car. Yeah. Oh, my God.

Talked about jumping my car a lot. Also, Jackie, we're in a fight because you skipped over Clay Aiken running for Congress. I did skip over Clay Aiken running for Congress. I know. We all know what happened. None of us want to talk about it. It's fine. You can skip.

Very embarrassing for everybody. You like look like him a little bit. I had a real Clay Aiken phase. I don't know if you know that about me. Hold on. I think, Jackie, you know that about me. Oh, I know that about you. repeatedly called to vote for him in 2003.

Talk about 2003. Number two for American Idol and lost to Ruben Stuttered. And who is the bigger star now? Yeah. Ruben Stuttered. Probably not you. I'm more of a Rubin fan, actually.

I'm sitting about the same. Actually, to be quite honest, I've heard the name Clay Aiken, and I've never heard Ruben Stutter. You've never heard Ruben Stutter? Did he have a stutter? That'd be funny. He's a great singer, actually.

He almost certainly deserved. to win. But I was a big Clay Aiken Stan. He had the right hair for me, you know, look like Calvin hair. Yeah, yeah. I get it. Yeah, exactly. He's rocking that. Bit of a Tom York vibe going on

there. Anywho's, now that the list is done, I find myself having vision issues. Oh, no. I think I'm going. One! Items! Oh, we can't see him. This A-list actress starred on one of the most iconic

shows of all time. Oh, by the way, I should, sorry, I should tee this up. First of all, blind items that I usually use, the site just has not updated since the last time we did this. I'm having a little bit of a personal crisis. But, you know, I found out, I found some good ones from a little bit before, and I love the kindness ones. And I found a couple of kindness ones for you guys. Let's get positive here for a little bit. I found two kindness ones, and one that is the silliest fucking blind. One of the most innocuous blinds I've ever seen. this A-list actress starred on one of the most iconic shows of all time. There was also, I think it was more than just one movie, but anyways, at least two film adaptations, I believe.

There is also a lot of fanfic written about her. She has a scholarship fund that pays for private school for about 100 kids a year at this point, and it just grows every year. She is beloved. Everyone loves her. The show is kind of spooky. It ran forever. It kind of fell flat in the last couple seasons. There was a movie or two that kind of helped it out.

She had a partner on the show. There was always a will-they-want-the-element to the... Jillian Anderson. Yes. I know that she has a scholarship fund and does all that stuff. Yeah, and that nice? Yeah. 100 kids a year at this point, and it grows every year she pays for their private school.

Her social media presence is fucking flawless, too, by the way, Alec Baldwin, take notes. Yeah, she just like, she'll... Actually, no, Alec, don't take notes. I love what you're doing, keep it up. Yeah, you're right, you're right. They're doing just what they should be doing. Yeah, her Twitter is hilarious.

She'll post, like, random dick jokes, but, like, in a very sophisticated way. Yeah, she's fun. She's great. She's absolutely fucking aging perfectly. Mm-hmm. She seems like she has a great relationship with her fans, all that good stuff.

Yeah. And her fans are fucking horrid. All right. Well, I mean, obviously, you're a fan of Julian Anderson. Of course, you're horny for her. Yeah. Here's another one. This A-list actor slash game, that's a big clue, but it'll be kind of hard to parse.

Took a bunch of money he thought he would never get back and pays for rec centers to stay open and have staff and provide food. So kids have a place to go after school. Isn't that nice? Not sweet. He is, his last name is a food. The game, there's a very popular game. one can play with him. I shared an elevator with him, so I, um, uh, it's very quick for me to immediately

kind of win the game if my name is the name involved. Um, your name is the name involved. That's right. That's right. We need to talk about him. Kevin. Kevin. And who would the last, his last name is, come on.

Kevin, hot dog. Bacon. Yes. Ah. I shared an elevator with him, so I'm one degree to Kevin Bacon. Oh, his name is a game. I got lost in that. It was like offset.

Is offset a game? I know. I was trying to board games. It's both the best and worst clue ever because, like, yeah, he's like his, what, six degrees of Kevin Bacon? You can't say there's six degrees to get to him because that would be too easy. Yeah, immediate. But, like, so it's like a great clue and a very confusing clue if you don't know. That's why I said that with the food.

Yeah, I shared an elevator with him once. Wow. So did he talk about Kira? Do you talk about Kira Sedgwick? He seemed very sweet. apparently he and Gira Sedgewick are like truly desperately still in love with each other which makes me so happy. She was not on the elevator.

He was there for something. Well, then I hate this story. But it was back when I worked at Getty Images. I don't know why he was there. And I kind of didn't even realize it was him until like we were getting off. I was like, oh shit, that's going to make him. He was very modest and sweet and seemed very friendly. All right.

Did he try to kiss him? Nope. Didn't do anything sexual to him allegedly. That's good. Yeah, allegedly. Allegedly. My hands on a satanic Bible. All right.

Whoa. House of Satan built. Oh, my God. Jesus, invoke yourself into this house. Get out of here. Invoke yourself into this house. Get out of here. This former A-list, mostly movie actress who pretty much, this is the innocuous one, by the way.

Former A-Lah, she's still kind of A, but she walked away. The former A-List, mostly movie actress who pretty much walked, walked away from acting, was vaping like a wall. woman on a mission while waiting for her car to be brought up by a valet. It was definitely not tobacco. She was vaping, Jackie. She was vaping and vaping and vaping. Yeah, bitch.

Yes, running my speed. Who was it? Who walked away from acting? There's something about her. Cameron Diaz. Not fun. Get high. But she was fit.

What a dumb blind item. Every other blind item is like, he was molested by the Dark Elves. And then it's like, she was. vaping a lot and it was weed. Hey, guess what? Everyone's vaping mad weed waiting for their valet in the Los Angeles. That is absolutely nothing to report on. There is nothing to be weirded out about there.

If I didn't have a job and I didn't have to drive myself anywhere, yeah, I'm vaping. She was doing a legal substance waiting for the vass. I mean, I guess she was going to get in the car and probably drive maybe. But, you know, come on, guys. No, what are we saying here? No, I think it's probably okay. It's probably okay a little bit, you know what I'm? She's married to Benji Madden from Good Charlotte.

Of course she's vaping Madweed. Yeah, exactly. Come on. All right, well, there's your blinds. I think it's just about time to end the show and everybody knows it. Ooh, adding songs to it. I appreciate it. You're welcome.

And I also appreciate you guys hanging out with us for this week's episode of page seven. Yeah, it's been fun. much. Even though I felt like you could feel my bucket hat through your ear holes. And I hope that that energy now lives within your spirit. And my name is Jackie Zabrowski. I'm vibing. And you can follow me in Instagram and Jack that worm.

You're vibing it. I'm different now. You could also come hang out. On Tuesdays we talk about sex. On Wednesdays we play Sims. And on Sundays, we play dating Sims. Yeah. Over on Twitch.

com. Oh, no, it's Jackie. So you should totally come and hang out there. Yeah, I think we all. It's all about time for us to grab a bucket hat and say fuck it bad and just vibe and not worry so much about anything anything else is going on. Why don't you vibe with me?

I'm ready for it. I'll get one. I'm going to get one. This is one fashion trend like because I couldn't pull off fucking cheetah tits or whatever you were doing a few years ago, but I think I could do. Oh, I still got a good amount of cheetah tits going on in my world. Each theme rolls over. Yeah, rolls in that next year.

It's a permanent choice. Yeah, layers upon itself. but I'm ready for this. This is a fashion movement I can get behind. I'm ready for the bucket hat, the bucket hat phenomenon to take hold. I think I'm a corduroy bucket hat. It's anything, any piece of clothing,

that's why I'm like getting, I don't know if the listeners have noticed, but I'm like getting softer on the whole anti-crock statement. Because anything at this point, maybe it's just me turning 40 or whatever, but any item of clothing. I might get crocs. Yeah, man.

I think I might too. Any article of clothing that just says, I don't give a fuck anymore. And that's to me what a bucket house is. Ouch. Yeah. Is it fun how I roll like a compliment into an insult into a compliment? It's like getting an email from people.

Yeah, it's just like getting an email. About the show for people. I like how you're like annoying on the show. It's like one of those. Jackie, I like how you're wearing that bucket hat now because it's a chute. Because you look like an idiot. You look like a boring. That's really good for you.

I think it's good that you look like an idiot now. Oh, so funny. Check me out for more shenanigernary on Twitch. TV, 4 slash Holdenaders Ho. We're on and off a little bit with touring. But besides that, normally I'm, besides like this week and two weeks from now, I am streaming Monday through Friday. And definitely, man, Jackin is back, dude.

I feel like we are blasting the Jackin these days. So check us out, especially on Friday where Jackie and I get crazy. and we're going to start scheduling more watch-alongs as well. We did them up at Christmas. We did the cats and, hey, come on. People want High School Musical 3. I was about to say, if you're wondering if we're going to do High School Musical 3 or not, bet on it, bed on it, bed on it, bed on it.

So check us out, Patreon.com forward slash page 7 podcast, weekly bonus episodes for just $5 a month and Jersey Shore Watch along on Thursdays for, just $10 a month on our Discord. It is so much for me. We have such a cool crew there. And lastly, page 7 podcast at gmail.com. Page the number 7 podcast at gmail.com. Attention.

Jackie Zabrowski, anti-royals. Yep, yeah, please. Yes. And, you know, maybe throw MJ in that as well, because there were some discrepancies with what their comments were made. So I just really want you guys to go after them this week. You can hate me as well. Go after them.

Leave me out of it. And, MJ? My name is MJ and I'm MJKLKat on Instagram. Oh, no, I might look like a penis with a little hat on with some of these. Look at this penis hat. I mean, I should post the picture of the penis hat because I'm going to buy this little hat that's going to make me look like a penis. Get the penis hat. It just makes me think of a league of their own.

It's just like you look like a penis with a little hat on. I love that. Anyway, it's time to sing the shout-out song. Shout Shout Let it all out These are the emails That you wrote it about

Come on We're gonna read them to you Come on That's not a bucket hat though That is a penis head hat I know but I think I'm just doing Head covering 2023 You already know that's a bad hat choice

Alright see you later everybody Have a good one Listen to our shoutouts Uh oh With shout out time Yes it is a shout out time. And can I just say, we have some of the cutest shoutouts today. Yes, spoiler alert. And you can send in your shoutouts to to page 7 podcast at gmail.com. That is page 7.7 the number podcast at gmail.com.

I read everything that comes in and it always puts a smile on my face because I love you guys. Because I want to kiss you guys. And I can kiss you. Well, consensually, maybe not kissing. But I can heavily hug you at the release the butthole cut tour so come and hang out because i want to meet you and i want to feel you in my arms i've been told i give very good hugs so slam that VIP ticket and come and give me a hug won't you anyway on to the shoutouts like i said they're cute today First of all, I just want to say a huge thank you to Betsy, who wrote in pro-fucking hat. Betsy says, I used to be against bucket hats because they felt so dated to me. However, after moving to Korea, I have been heavily influenced by the 90s street style that the 20-somethings in my neighborhood wear.

I finally gave in and bought a bucket hat, which also has a tie. Can I just say, Betsy, you look fucking fantastic. So if you're out on a windy day or on a boat, you can tie it around your chin, which my bestie's referred to as a baby's first day at the beach. I have to admit that I love my bucket hat and also caved and bought matching Crocs. I'm a kindergarten teacher and I'm always taking my shoes on and off, which makes Crocs the perfect teacher shoe. Plus, I love flexing my fancy gibbets on the kids.

I fully support Jackie's impending bucket hat collection and honestly can't wait until she is Team Crocs also, oh my God, it's beginning, Betsy. Please enjoy my bucket at looks of me in Thailand on a boat and also bonus picks of my matching crocs. You look fabulous, Betsy, and I can't thank you for your encouragement enough. Thank you, Betsy. And now our next shout-out is from Mod. Maude says I'm 20, gonna be 21 in April, and I'm from Seattle, and I just want to say this is long overdue. I've been wanting to give a shout-out for a year and a half now, but I genuinely didn't have the strength to compose an email for myself, but here I am, and I'm giving my partner and myself a shout-out,

because I have been through hell and back these last couple of years, from losing every single one of my friends to taking care of my dad for about a year. My dad has a severe liver disease that causes his brain to get flooded with ammonia, causing brain damage. I recently got him into hospice, but the last year has been incredibly hard on me, being a caretaker and working 40 hours a week on top of a bunch of mental health issues. But yesterday, I just got my dream job for a behavior technician for children with autism, and I got a cat five days before that, and I wouldn't have

made it to these days without my wonderful and amazing partner, Sam. They have seen me at my worst, and I plan to have them there at my best. Although we've had our ups and downs because the pressure of everything, our mental health, we still have stuck together through thick and thin with patience, love, and forgiveness.

And I couldn't ask for anything more. Happy two years, bug! Oh my God, I love y'all's love! And I especially love y'all's love because, oh my God, they rode into each other. I burst into teens. I'm assuming you guys, you have to have been writing about this, about each other, because the next

email says, my name's Sam, and I want to give a shout out to my partner, Maude. They absolutely love this podcast, and it's been a lifesaver throughout a crappy year. Thank you for being such a light in our lives and being a classic podcast for our road trips and drives to work. Maude is my best friend in the entire world, and listening to this podcast has brought us together so we can shit on random celebrities when we're too depressed to do anything else. Maude has had a hell of a year and has accomplished more than they even know. I couldn't be more proud of a person. Maude and I both came out as non-binary while we were together, and it's been a beautiful

journey of realizing who we both are. Thank you for your constant support and love. you're the best partner I could ever ask for and I love you more than anything in this entire world, even more than my cat. Maude, if you're hearing this, you're the best. And thank you, page seven, for being so epic. And oh my God, Sam and Maude, I love you both. I just send you so much love.

Oh, I'm hugging you right now and I hope that you feel it. Because again, I don't know if you've heard, but I give very good hugs and I'm hugging you. I love you both so much. good luck with everything and you got this. You're strong and you fucking got this. You made it through so far and you're going to keep making it through. Hell yeah. I support you both fully.

I love you both so much and I love all you guys. Thank you so much for sending in your shoutouts to page 7 podcast at gmail.com because again, I know I think I say it every week. It makes my heart sing. I love you guys. I'll talk to you next week. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors.

can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.