Page 7 - Ep. 480: The Devil's Work

Episode Date: February 10, 2023

This week we're gossin' 'bout how hard we throb for Dennis Quaid, movies that animals WERE harmed during the production of, the horrors of Prancer, Sam Smith kickstarting the satanic cabals great war to end us all at the Grammys, what did Jen say to Ben!?, MJ takes us back to the darkest Groundhog Day EVER, and in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner; Is Jay-Z a VIRGIN!? An award-winning List, Blindz, Shoutz, and MORE! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

to talk about Bo-new-Noo-N-N-N-N-O-N-O A little miss riddle figure out, babe B'u-N-U Let's give a something to talk about Why are you laughing at me? How about love? I'm Bonnie Raid now, dog.

Welcome to page 7. Are you scared? I'm singing the Bonnie Raid song I do know because I don't know the song that she won for Best Song of the Year. I started laughing because I was like, oh, what could they give them to talk about? Like he sets himself on fire and runs to me.

Oh, so you were just, you know what I mean? What can he do? No, it's a, no, it's, remember the movie? Do you ever see the movie, something to talk about? I never did see that. I need to do a double feature of that in nine to five, because I don't think I've seen either of those movies, and I think that would be a good double feach.

I worry that one is going to be vastly better than the other one. And it's going to be nine to five, right? I think, well, I love the movie something to talk about, but I don't think that everybody loves the movie, something to talk about. But I also love the song, something to talk about. So for me, that was, you know, big. This is Julia Roberts. Dennis Quaid, you know, love romcom. I think Kira Sedgwick is in it. I was going to say, I know just from hearing it, like, extremely strong 90s rom-com memories are coming back. Oh, yeah, bro. Oh, yeah. Something to talk about, man. That is a heart throbbed. I have not thought about

once since his. Oh, man, I still throbbed for him. Do you still throbbed? I don't think I throbbed that and I don't think I throbbed now. Ouch. I was throbbing the other day, but I'm pretty sure. It's a tumour. Okay. Remember kindergarten and cop, that's a movie. That's a movie you can set your watch by.

Get that checked out. Wait, no. It's a too ma. Hold the phone. Wait a second. Are we talking, are we anti-Dennis quaid slippage? I mean, in terms of my, when my penis gets hard, it's to usually a woman with breast. So I have a hard time answering that question.

Yeah, but you can look at it. Dennis Quaid and feel the thrust. Yeah, I could see how some sort of lust would happen. I remember frequency? I was obsessed with that movie and it was because I didn't want to bang the young one. I wanted to bang the old one. No, Jackie Bies, I remember a different movie with Dennis Quaid in it. And that movie is called A Dog's Purpose. Or a Dog's Journey, the sequel to a Dog's Purpose.

Wow. Dennis Quaid's catalog. He likes hurting dogs. Isn't that the whole thing with those movies? He likes hurting dogs. doesn't like hurting them. Yes, he does. He likes to watch them be sad on a movie set. Those aren't the movies where all the dogs died, right? Isn't it dog's purpose? Wasn't there a controversy? It's not my low notice bad, at least. I've never heard of a dog's purpose, so I don't think there was a controversy about it. Oh, okay, I thought that was a controversy around. Production. Controversy. On January 18, video service, T.m. Z. Showing footage taken for the set of the film, which shows a male German shepherd named Hercules being,

Herklee's being dragged and dipped into rushing water while visibly resisting. After a cut in the video, the next one shows the dog being submerged in the water at the other end of the tank while a voice on set can be heard, shouting, cut it. Oh my God. So if you'd like to send an email into the podcast, attention, Jackie, why do you support the abusive dogs? I don't support the abusive dogs. Who knew? I thought, I would just assumed that a dog controversy would have been about a more popular dog movie, like Homeward Boundaries. or something, but apparently...

No, that one got the... I think the kibosh got put on it. I'm fairly sure if I remember correctly. It's a Dennis Quaid. Interesting. Yeah, well, there's also a movie called electrocuting an elephant. And guess what happens in that movie?

Is it really called that? Is it really called that? Yes, it is. Apparently Thomas Edison is in it. Like, this is like back in the dizzy. Right. It's when it's just... Thomas Edison is in it.

Wow. It's like the movies were just simple acts. Like picking up the mail from the mailman. After being deemed a threat to people, a circus elephant named Topsy was condemned to hang. Thomas Edison intervened, suggesting electrocution instead. Oh, my God. Then he filmed it. Well, to be fair, no one likes anything named Topsy.

How do you hang an elephant? That is actually an interesting. The heaviest animal. It's a science experiment. He was just trying, I think he was hanging a lot of animals back then just to see the, you know, biology of it all. Unbelievable. This is a upsetting beginning to the show, you guys. We're here to talk about the real animals.

I looked up Almost from Dennis Quaid Who's on the list of animal abuse? Who's on the list? Jackie! I did find a list that are movies That's that have killed animals during production. Yes, I have.

That list is canceled. It is a rough. It's a rough list. Definitely Milo Notice. The Milo Notice should be on this list twice. I'm going to stop you there. I don't want to know. Oh, you know.

You don't want to know about snow buddies? I don't want to know a thing. I mean, I do in the sense that we probably shouldn't make those movies. There should be changed that I can, that can happen without me finding out any details whatsoever. Just tell me Homeward Bound is not on that list. Homeward Bound is not on the list. That's my, that's my beloved animals in a movie, movie. Shadow.

Sassy. Yeah, but, you know, sassy, you know, always got in my. grip. Your grip? Yeah, man. I don't know what happened. All of a sudden, she's in my grip. And I'm like, Sassy, no.

Sassy, get out of my grip. What is your grip? She's a thorn in my side. Do you mean a gripe? She's a gripe. She's my gripe. She's my gripe. Yeah.

Gotcha. I will, because my problem is I immediately went to like whole-centric words. And I was like, I'm not talking about putting it in my hole. I'm not talking about putting it in my hole. And that's what was going over and over again in my head. As I said, grip. But also, she's in your gripe isn't a thing either. I know.

I'm just trying to make a Jackie thing. That's not a turn of phrase. She's, Sassy was in my gripe. It will make sense to no one except you and me and maybe the people who listen to the show. You understand what I meant. But it makes more sense than Sassy, the cat from homeward bound two decades ago, was in my grip, you know. Yes. I'm just trying to guide, gently guide Jackie back towards coherence.

It's so early. Thank you. So early in the morning, you guys are talking nothing, right? You're saying literally nothing. I forgot that we were recording today. I think that I'm all, like, my brain is all juke because I was just like in my pajamas, making Jeff some lunch. And I was like slowly like waking up in my day.

What are we making for lunch? What are we making for lunch for Jeff? A quinoa salad. Put some chicken in there. That sounds great. Cranberries. That's nice. And, like, keeping it nice and light.

And I just, he was like, don't you have to go. to work. And I was like, oh my God. Like I made a cartoonish sound. Not a sudden your breast were on fire. And also apparently two dozen animals could have been hurt on the Hobbit trilogy. Wow. Close the tab, Jackie.

People don't want this. Peter Jackson released a statement saying the allegations were untrue. I've closed the tab. The tab is closed. I'm not looking at the list anymore. Do you see any other just movies that caught your eye, though? No, there are a couple that are in there. A couple shawkers.

There's a couple that are, well, not too many shockers. Okay. Was any airbud? Airbuds on there? No, no, not a single airbud. They must have treated those animals like gold. There you go. So support airbud in the theater and don't support Milo and Oda.

What about, what's the one where the dog dies of Jennifer Aniston? My friend Gillette. Oh, yeah. It's like, Murphy's head fell off. No My dog doesn't have Jennifer Aniston But it does have the dog

From Frazier No No Yeah I know the one you're talking about It's like my sad dog Yeah I'm a dead sad dog Old Yeller

I heard that dog Got bloated spraids out Well that was Man it was just like Marley and me Marley and me Have you guys Have you guys ever seen

Very different movie She the dog comes back From the dead Although similar end I think To the same people Do you ever see Prancer? No. No.

The saddest Christmas movie of all time. My mom tried to get me to re-watch Prancer over Christmas and I was like, why would I want to watch Prancer again? She has the reindeer and the reindeer dies, I'm guessing. No, it's not even that. She like, if I, I just remember, the last time I saw it, I was a kid. And I just remember crying and crying because, like, she's in an abusive home and she finds this reindeer, but you don't know if the reindeer's, like, real or not. And then it's like the father finds out and they're like just like beats her. Like it's like it's such a horrible Christmas movie.

Yeah, yeah. And maybe it's not as bad in rewatching it. But from what I recall, I don't want to watch it again. Corrus Leachman, Sam Elliott. What a cast. Dude, I know. Wow. I think that it's also, I think it's the Sam Elliott that gets my mom coming back for more.

But also I think Sam Elliott's bad in the movie. Oh, now I'm just looking at sad kids movies. What's going on right now? We had a time with the Grammys, you guys. What's the one with the kid? Yeah, we have to talk about how everyone is just so scared of Sam Smith. It's evil. Oh, my God, that Sam Smith, look at him and all of his dress that he'd been wearing.

I hate, I hate them. And especially I love what they did during the Grammys is that they did a satanic version of their song. Like, it was such an amazing performance. It was great. And it made me so happy. Like, yeah, Sam, yeah, set them all on fire. I was like, oh, you want this? Oh, is this evil?

Oh, is this scary to people? Then we're going to make it look fucking awesome. It's so funny because we just had a satanic panic that felt very retro about Lil Nas X's video. What was that last year or two years ago? I don't know anything. It's a great lean into it. It's a great money make. Totally.

It will always blow my mind. I remember the first instance of this in my childhood memory was when Angels in America came to Charlotte and there were all these protests. And guess what happened? The whole run got sold out. They had to extend it. They had to add days because that's what happens when you flip out and make a big deal out of stuff. It just gets sold out. There's a thing specifically about satanic panic that is like, and I'm sure that, you know, Sam Smith and Competrus knew that they were referencing this. But it's just like, this is so old-fashioned. school. Yeah, exactly. I love it though, but it is something that we should be celebrating is the fact that Sam Smith is the first non-binary artist to win in the best pop duo slash group performance category. And also, Cam Petrus is the first trans woman to also take home this award. So these are, this is a historic, like, fuck you.

It's such a great fuck you to these idiots out there. Her speech was so beautiful. I know. And it was great. Sam Smith was like, you're going to be the one to accept the award. award and everybody gave her a standing ovation when she said I'm the first trans person to get this award. And she talked about how her mom, she wouldn't be here if it wasn't for her mom, who believed her that she was a girl. It was just one of those things. We talk all the time about

the limits of what can be said and done effectively, politically at an award show. And I feel like, you know, often there was like a whole stretch there after 2016 when Trump was elected where the award shows got like really like, let's try to make some politics happen. here tonight. And sometimes it was kind of fun and sometimes it just fell really flat. But there was something very moving to me about seeing the room stand up for Kim Petrus, especially after seeing, you know, just the nonstop constant panic ginned up by Fox News and the right about trans people to just have her be like, I'm the first trans woman to get this award. And thank you to my mom for loving me and having everybody applaud that. I thought was very moving.

Right, right. Oh, God. The, I will say the comments under the Sam Smith article, none of them are funny. I just went down such a, I was just like, oh. Yeah, no, that's a turn off the comments. I just can't, I can't imagine, I can't imagine just living with such hate in your heart that you need to write these shit comments about someone. Like, I'm starting to get upset. Now I can read a whole list about the animals getting hurt in the production, not crying.

You're right. These comments made me cry. You're witty. I am not looking at the comments. From David W. I don't know if it was evil, but it certainly was awful. That one was the least of them. And people are just shitting on this.

I was surprised that Adele didn't perform. I was surprised that Beyonce didn't perform. Would have loved to see Beyonce perform. I feel like it's been so long since there's just been like a really big public Beyonce perform. right? This is such a funny comment. I have to bring it up.

This is what Swanson said. He has a bad management team advising a bitch. They just won a Grammy and performed on the Grammy. I think they're doing it. That is such a perfect thing like to be like, it's not only the unholy homosexuality that I hit it. So it's just bad management. It's like I'm pretty sure Sam Smith is doing quite well.

Oh, especially like the people that are. They're like, this isn't something that hasn't been done before. It's like, yeah, we know. Like, they're throwing it back in their face because they keep saying that it's evil and then it's satanic when none of it, when it's not. It's a joke. Like, I think it's like, that's the thing. The other funny thing is, what is the name of the other song that everybody is upset about

because of what I guess he's wearing in the music video? What's the name of the song? I did not come here to make friends. That's the name of the other song that came out, the Sam Smith other music video that came out. Awareness of what it is like trying to convey to your stupid, close-minded ass. Like, it's so funny to play into it is hilarious to me.

They're doing exactly what Sam Smith wants. They're doing exactly what Sam Smith. Yeah, the lack of self-aware. Right, like, oh, it's satanic when Lil Las X is, you know, giving the devil a lap dance. I wonder, I wonder why they're, he's using satanic imagery. Now Sam Smith is using satanic image.

It's because they're actual Satanous. Or perhaps it is because you, there is a certain group of people who have been told that they will burn in hell for the rest of their lives. And this is. Right. And I was just talking to somebody over the weekend who was from Kentucky and they described like the different flavors of Christianity. Because I was talking about Irish Catholicism and all the guilt and the shame. and they this person was like well I'm from uh Kentucky and from where my part of Kentucky we call it

the flavor of Christianity is like uh like fear of hell burning you know and like that and she was saying like your whole like if if you go to church not just on Sunday but also a couple times throughout the week for you know different like night stuff community stuff going on that's your community and you are told about hell and hell fire and hell burning and then and it was just interesting because I don't really think about like hell as a motivating factor anymore. But of course it still is for a lot of people. And I feel like that's actually what's why this satanic stuff is so, you know, interesting to see, to see the, the Tucker Carlson reaction to it of like, oh, this is taking it literally. Like, this is actually Satanism. But I was thinking about

that conversation when I was watching that performance because I was like, oh, yeah, like they're actually, it's really like real to use hell as a weapon to tell people that they should be ashamed of themselves and that what they're doing is wrong. And so that's why it's like powerful to switch that. I just forget that like for a lot of people like the fear of burning in hell really is a thing that they're real. Yeah. Pretty wild. Yeah. And that they grow up with, you know, especially totally. They're conditioned. Right. Yeah. They're conditioned to feel that way or conditioned to feel that way that like, oh, if I jerk off, then I'm going to go to hell. Can you imagine? Man, I would just be, just go ahead, burn me now.

I think that's exactly what they're saying. Just burn me now then, fine. All right, bring it on. I'll take it. Look, everyone's no stranger to my masturbation practices, especially for me, yogurt. Oh, yes. Oh, yeah, yeah.

You used to put soap on the rim of a cup, was it? Yes, soap in the rim. He talked about this in the live show. I was very surprised. I thought this is ingenuity at its best. It was a paper cup, so it was disposable, and it was a very great way to create. The cop is all apart.

Did you guys just have lube? Like, I don't understand what's going on here. Did you just have access to lubricant? We're self-loby. Yeah, we didn't need a lube. Yeah, you guys self-lub. Yeah. So we, I need a bit of lubricant and the spit is fine, I guess, but it gets a little nasty.

Oh, yeah. Especially, oh, fucking high school or spit. Was your spit different in high school? I'm gonna, I'm gonna, since I drank about five Coca-Cola. Oh, yeah, you know water. Very little water. I'm going to go ahead and assume it was pretty noxious. Oh, God.

I'm going to use the word noxious, Jackie. I was just thrown back to being in a youth and just remembering. I'm not going to, this is too, I think it's too graphic for me to say. Wow. Can you say it won't cut it out? What is it? Just thinking about how bad I thought splooge tasted and then I realized, no, it's just because the spluge that I had been tasting were from people that weren't just disgusting human beings that weren't drinking any water and weren't taking care of themselves. So it came out that it was just like, is it supposed to be like a pancake?

It was supposed to be moving across the table. I guess I can leave that in. Yeah, yeah, that's fine. It's right, yeah. It's not on them. It's not on you. Yeah, you didn't do anything wrong. You were doing the Lord's work.

Or the devil's work. The devil's work. The devil's work. Well, there you go, Jackie. You nailed it. By the way, you're a real musical soothsayer. You were like, this song's the jam. I love this song.

This is my shit. Yeah, man. And it goes on to fucking win the big ring. It's such a good song. It's just get stuck in your head. It's a major earworm. It's a great pop song. And that's what I don't understand

when people are like, oh, this song. It means it's an amazing pop song if it gets stuck in your head. That's the point of pop. Is it supposed to be earworms? It's supposed to get in your brain, man. Sam Smith is the master of the earworm.

You know, you got a stand. Yes. Yes. And now what about the fact that Beyonce say it was just straight up late to the Grammys, apparently. I was like, what happens there? Like, you got three young kids. Can you blame it on the kids?

Where you're just still getting ready? Like, how are you an hour late to the Grammys? It's perfect. I love it. I have no problem with it. But I did, I just want to know why and how. Because there's got to be a number of very reasonable explanations. And then also some slightly more unreasonable explanations of

how it happens that you're just like, I'm just gonna... Is she juggling the kids before the Grammys? You think that she actually is? My, that's what I was like, oh, I would be an hour late to the Grammys. But then I was like, well, that's, she probably has someone else watching. Oh, a team. Oh, she totally, she has full on mother, father, Beyonce Jay-Z look-alike team that they just pretend to be the parents.

Oh, my God, how awesome would that be? Oh, my God, amazing. Okay. You know, all right, thanks so much. You know, hold and look-alike. He's like, yeah, you're welcome. That's what, man, once AI comes around, I saw that movie After Yang, when all of a sudden you have a member of the family that After Yang was so fucking good.

But maybe would you, if you could, have AI versions of you to watch the kids when you're not around? There you go. I don't know. Would you hold in? Do you want a robot daddy for Winnie? For like a one day, like a day. But they're so expensive and it takes so much time. You can't have it for one day.

You're either in or you're out. You've got to clean them out because part of that day would be me fucking the AIs too, right? So they have to be cleaned out for like a week. They've got to be hosed out. Yeah, they do have probably get hosed. Wait, would you have sex with yourself? Whoa. Or like maybe at my, I would watch me.

I'd watch me fuck or what I mean or something. You know what I mean? Oh my God, I would not want to watch me fuck. I mean, no. I shouldn't be judgy. If you want to watch yourself fuck, that's not. Yeah. By the way, M.J.

Seriously, you're no better than the Ted Cruz right now. That's satanic. I don't know about that. No, no, no, you're right. People like to watch themselves. People like to have a mirror. They like to have a phone set up. You're right.

What if it's like a ripped, ripped version of yourself? Like whatever your full physical ideal is to do that. Then I'd hate myself and be like, just let that one be me. It's in the corner and I'd cry and I'd come and I'd cry. You know what I mean? Yeah. You know what? It would smell and taste good when it came.

out because I drink liquids and I'm not like the boys you date, quote, quote, dated in high school. I'm sure she thought she was dating them. I don't know if I was as, I don't think I even used the word dating. Oh, dated is the word necessarily. Yeah, I believe you called yourself just the cum dispensary of X, Y, Z. Yes, but also, I mean, where else were they going to put it? Right. They had to give it somewhere, and I was the receptacle.

It's so beautiful. All of this. I would say that Ben Affleck looked a bit like a receptacle of sorts. What is his problem? I know we love it. Why is he so upset? He's so sad. He's got resting.

He's got jalo. He's got resting sad face. He really has to. It must be that. He must just have a sad, neutral face. Because I always thought he was upset before because of his like falling apart marriage with Jennifer Garner and then he was fucking a nanny. And then everybody was making fun of him for being sad and sing.

and old and everyone was making fun of his back tattoo. Jesus. And Jay, why did you give him someone? He doesn't listen to this. Five guys are going to jump off a fucking building. I don't think, I think Ben Epplic is fine. But he's doing great.

He's got Jalo back. He's doing great. Everybody loves him again. Why are you so sad all the time? And what do you think she whispered to him when she snapped at? Okay. Did you see, did you see watch the little video?

So for everyone at home that hasn't seen it, there's this little video. that is, they're talking, like, you can see Trevor Noah's doing his whatever hosting thing, and they didn't realize they were on camera. And J.Lo is talking to Ben Affleck and is obviously, like, reprimanding him for looking so miserable. And then at the end, she must have said, like, and sit up straight. Because he sits up straight and she turns around and then you can tell she immediately sees that she's on camera. She puts on a smile.

Yeah. And she definitely just got caught reprimanding her husband. Which, let's be fair. I feel like we've all had, like, I don't like, I don't believe in a partnership reprimanding each other. But you've definitely been very frustrated with a partner and have said something in a curt way of like, can you just not be like this right now? And you shouldn't talk to your partner like that, but sometimes it happens. And what if millions of people get you doing? So embarrassing. I'm also going to throw this out there for all resting sad face.

A little known secret is that a lot of these award shows, especially if you don't have any skin in the game or like really... I'd be so bored. They're so fucking boring. They're horrifically boring. The Grammys are the least boring one though. This is the thing. Well, maybe the Golden Gloves a little bit.

And the Golden Globes because they can get a drug party. But like there's art happening at the Grammys, right? We've talked about this before too with awards shows. Like, you can, if it's about TV or movies, it's fun to watch the clips, but you can't really reproduce like the art live. in a way that is fun, like in the way that you could for the Tonys or for the Grammys. And so at the Grammys, you're seeing brilliant artists performing live. So that's the thing. Ben, just fix your face.

You're surrounded. You are in like the awards night for an industry that is more fun than yours. It's a bunch of musicians and they're performing live. Like, fixed your face. Point, counterpoint, though. A lot of that show is un-televised. And yes, they're showing you all the fun performances. but there is so much more

just sitting there. Just slow moving awards acceptance speeches by people no one's ever heard of too. That's the only thing about the Grammys. So many of the people who get up there you're like, who is this guy? That's probably why Beyonce was late.

Beyonce was probably like, there's nothing good that happens in the first hour we don't need to worry about it. But then she won a Grammy. She missed her own award. And I think that we can all say here, well, actually, no, I can't speak for you too. Okay.

But I was very surprised that Beyonce didn't win best album of the year for Renaissance. I do love Harry's House, though. I think it's a great fucking album. After Lemonade and after the, like, the upset that was Lemonade, I am very surprised that Beyonce didn't get Best Album. It is funny, though, the thing around Beyonce, and this is just me, you know, definitely looking at, first of all, Beehive, I love y'all. you know what I'm saying?

Oh no, it's never good if he starts like that. I love the beehive. Buzzy, buzzy, buzzy. I love the beehive. Don't sing me, don't see me. Why is she like the one artist, even though there's a lot of people put out great albums. And I guess we just have to,

it's this whole bow down to the queen thing, and we all have to respect how much better she is than everyone else that, like, people are like, we have to, we all, like, there's this idea that you should almost apologize if you win an award over her, right? Which like, I even saw someone be like, at least Lizzo apologized to Beyonce when she won.

And so did Adele. Adel. Adel wept, remember a few years ago? She was like, it was supposed to be me. It was supposed to be Beyonce. No, Adele, you put out a fucking incredible album. You sell out insane residencies for months. Beehive. I love you guys.

But they're really sticking it to Harry Styles. They even booed Harry Styles for winning. It's not stupid. What I will say, it's not his fault. It's totally not his fault. I think that Holden, just to highlight some context that is important here is that the black, that she's a black woman and the Grammys have a particular history of ignoring black artists and, you know, black women.

And so I think that that is. Only 10 black artists have won album of the year and a black woman has not won the award since Lauren Hill in 1999. And she's Beyonce, you know. And she's Beyonce, you know, like whether or not you think it was this album, I think it's just like, you're telling me Beyonce has not one album of the year. Album of the year? But again, weren't there other black artists up for album of the year?

It's not like we have to, it's not like anyone's being like, well, oh. Sorry Lizzo. Yeah, exactly. Sorry Lizzo. And other point, counterpoint, you know, this really doesn't happen very often to people like Harry Seibles. Okay. So, all right, he says this.

It's a really happened very often. It's a cozy movie. It's a real good to the movie movie thing to say in an acceptance speech. I said this during the acceptance speech. So, of course, I, like, I watched the acceptance speech, and I, before I even just saw the backlash, I was just like, what? Excuse me? But I did look into it because I don't, honestly, even throw it out there. I don't know much about Harry Stiles.

So I was like, let me just look at what he's referring to, because obviously he's not referring to the fact that he's white. Right? Yeah, he's a little, he's a little poor boy from a small little town, right? He's a poor boy from a quiet village. I wish he had maybe elaborated on that. He could have been like. He should have explained a little bit more. People like me.

Poor people or people like me, people from a small town. People like me, men who wear glitter and dress. There's a lot of interesting, awesome, special, different things about Harry Styles, for sure. It's just hilarious to have him win when everyone was thinking Beyonce would win and then be like, this really doesn't happen for people like me, as opposed to, you know, black women who, as Jackie just cited, are historically and constantly

snubbed by the Grammys. I'm going to do this from now on. If I ever win an award, I'm going to apologize to Beyonce. Beyonce, I'm sorry. It's a podcasting award. It should have been you. But also, Beyonce did also break a record

during the Grammys that she is the most awarded artist in Grammy history with 32 wins. And that's at her age. She has so much more career left. It's not even funny. So she's going to kill that record. It is going to be stomped to the ground.

I don't know. I just say exactly. And bring up that is exactly what. I can't wait for the emails I'm going to get. But it's like, I think she's doing fine. She's doing fine. And, you know, I think, you know, it's good for her. And I love her.

And Beehive, I love you guys. It's good for her. Sounds like someone's placating right now. I apologize. Sounds like someone's. running scared right now. And Swifties are a little whatever, too. I'll just say it.

Whoa. So how did you feel about the fact? So Tate's time to shine is going to be next Grammys, correct? Oh, right, because Midnights came out. Yeah, now that I think about it, Midnights came out this yars. So it would be, yeah, so that'll probably be. I was surprised, though, she wasn't asked to perform. Or maybe she probably was, but she's probably just gearing up for ERAs is so soon.

Eres is so soon. It starts, I think, in March is the first Erez date. her big tour. And I'm pretty sure she has to get Speak Now, Taylor's Version and Reputation Taylor's Version out before she goes on that tour lest she not play songs from those albums. But maybe I'm wrong here.

But I just knowing her. So I think she's gearing up for a lot of stuff. Knowing her. She's going to have to. Knowing her. Because she's dedicated. Yeah. Wow.

Have you followed at all the extremely, if you thought the Taylor Swift ticket sales rollout was bungled, the Beyonce rollout, like, that people are... I saw that her tour was going to sell. I was just like, I'm not even going to fucking try. I'm so sad because I've never seen her alive and I probably never will, you know, because it's just like, no way. Not in this climate.

That is the hottest ticket. It's like, I said, oh, I bet. I bet. I bet it's insane. It's so... So Ticket Master, even though they're undergoing this huge trial right now, they can't stop it mid. Like, it's not like, oh, what?

don't we put it on pause that you can buy in bulk and resell the tickets. They're not putting any of that on pause? I haven't even looked into this, MJ. This is an MJ breaking story. MJ, give us every single bit of information about this story. I've said it already. All I know is that people are very upset because it appears to be like, I mean, I've seen people saying compared to the impossible journey that was getting Taylor Swift tickets

that the Beyonce journey is, like, you have to pre-regist. people have been working on this for days and days, but I'm not sure what, like, systemic change ticket master that has promised is, it seems to be, it just, everything I've seen about the Beyonce tickets are like, if you have literally thousands of dollars

and, like, an assistant to make it their full-time job to get into the pre-sale, then maybe you'll be a Beyonce ticket, you know. Totally, totally. Also, Countdown's a perfect song. Just need to you guys know that. Countdown is a perfect song. Countdown's a perfect song.

It's all good. And Jackie's having a sneeze. It went back in my face! It went back in your face. Oh, and it goes back in, man. It's not going to come out for a long time. It's the worst, yeah, totally. Oh, man, it's all hiding and scared now and there.

It's like a kid. If it goes back in, it doesn't come out for another three months. Is that what happens if you see? The vagina sucks it back in? It's a groundhog. Three more weeks of pregnancy. Oh, my God. Well, this is good to know for my future.

I don't know anything about that. And the groundhog did see its shadow, and it is three more weeks of winter. Groundhog's day. How do you feel about more winter? Well, it doesn't affect our life. How do you feel, MJ? I love the weather here right now. I can't enjoy Groundhog's Day ever since Bill de Blasio accidentally killed a

groundhog. What? I figured you'd enjoy it even more. How hilarious was that? Reopen your tab about animal cruelty and see if Bill de Blasio killing it. Oh, my God. Oh, my goodness. It's not like Groundhog Day never met much to me before, aside from the excellent movie, obviously.

But now every time I just think about how. Bill de Blasio was so tall that when he dropped that groundhog, it died. So, happy Groundhog Day. I hope everybody enjoyed it. Everybody remember. Remember what happened on that Groundhog day, that faded Groundhog Day. Pug Satani, Pete, or whatever. Right, right, right.

They don't call him Pug Satani, Phil, outside of Pug Satani. Thank you very much, MJ. Yeah, it might have been the Staten Island Groundhog, actually. Yeah, isn't it like Staten Island stand or something, but it doesn't matter he's dead? because it's gold outside. Oh my God. It's such a great movie. It's cold outside every day.

But what about are you guys getting geared up for Rihanna during the Super Bowl? Oh, M.G. The comments under the Rihanna article just similarly atrocious. Really? Oh, yeah. They really, apparently the people that look at page 6.com hate Rihanna for some reason. It's just like, because it's the New York Post. Yeah, it's the New York Post.

You don't realize what a mogul and what an amazing. human being Rihanna is check out the Rihanna episode of pop history that we put out last year because I didn't realize how much of a like what a stellar business woman and just like talk about someone that came from nothing that just was like no I'm going and she's just it's unbelievable you know what things like this don't happen to her very off to people like her very often Yes. Take that, Harry Stiles. I'm happy for him, though.

It's fine. Harry Stiles, you know, I think that nobody is not happy for Harry Styles, except for people who feel like it should have been Beyonce, which those people are probably also right. It's just hilarious. Harry Stiles. I did want to talk about a TikTok from one of the dancers from Harry Stiles's performance, who's getting a lot of kickback, and he shed some light on. So if you watch the Harry Stiles performance, a lot of people were.

underwhelmed with the Harry Styles performance, but it started off on this big spinning part of the stage that was spinning in one direction, and they'd been... One direction. They'd been working on this performance all week,

and when they started it, lights go up, and the huge part of the stage that is spinning was spinning the other way. And so all of the choreography had to be like on the spot, live, changed. They had to redo

like all the dances together had to try and figure out what to do and how to change including Harry Styles and the fact that they did and I had no idea so watching the TikTok he went through like this dancer explained how it was supposed to be

and how it actually ended up happening. That's why it was weirdly under like, underwhelming. Can you imagine what a weird shock of like okay like while Harry Styles is singing trying to figure out how do we change up? up the performance. I definitely was going to come in and

and read me and like, that performance was borough, schnoero. But I do, I wonder, it must have something to do with the fact that, like, you, they were so knocked off their, their saddles. He seemed, that would make more sense to me because he seemed

like unhappy. He seemed like frustrated. Yes. So that totally makes sense now. And I was wondering, and you're like, wondering why, like, you get to perform, you're up for all these awards. But yeah, so that's probably what it was. The production,

off of the production, which I get, having done a tour. Yes, and the fact that they practice it every day for a week, they did like these insane practices with it on the actual stage, too. So there was no reason for it to go wrong. And it just something happened. This is, I, I'm surprised you're like upset about the comments under the Rion article because I think there are some fucking hilarious ones. First of all, you've got this.

I just want to preface this, this is my, the modern sports played by steroid mutants are not a sport. See a Broadway show instead. No, it is like an opposite take. This might be the most boring person I've ever found on the internet. This is from a person who tells himself, really. The Super Bowl show is highly overrated. Is it really necessary?

I think not. Time would be better spent with the game progressing. It is, after all, just another football game. Shut up. What kind of? What joyless loser are you? Like, what are you? progressing? Are you fucking out of your mind? And then this one's hilarious. This is, I cannot believe

people think like this. Rihanna does not have the body of work to fill a halftime show. The deep state is truly running out of bodies to dupe the masses. Yes, the NFL is controlled by the deep state. So you think the deep state that truly exists is spending all of their time booking Rihanna on the halftime show. That is your line of thinking. Well, that's the same you know, the Marjorie Taylor Green tweeted out that the satanic, how dare you invoker. The satanic unholy performance was brought to you by Pfizer. So there's this hilarious idea, this like mashup where it's like the deep state,

the pharmaceutical industry, they're all in bed for the trans people and the like black women entrepreneurs. It's like the weirdest, it's the weirdest mashup of beliefs. It's fantastic. Pfizer brought you. Brought to you by Pfizer. That proves it's the devil. I mean, I guess Pfizer is the devil.

I do believe you on that. It's just so funny. You just, you know they're brain dead when they're talking about, like, pop culture stuff and trying to connect it to some giant.

It's like, you're so stupid. You would think that, like, that's what the deep state cares about. They care about the Super Time show and Rihanna. I wish.

Put some, you know what I mean? Or. Put some energy and resources into the Super Bowl half time. time show instead of all the wars. I would love it. What was the other one? The other one recently, we were screaming about the exact same thing.

I forgot what it was. But it was, yeah, it was just this exact kind of stuff where it's like, you're so stupid. You think they're in, you know, they're dealing with pop music. Like, if there's a deep state, it's way more insidious than that. You know what I mean? Is there, is Rihanna going to, is it Rihanna and anybody else? Is there going to be any, is she going to have any awesome guest stars? Like I feel like, as of right now, it's just Rial.

I feel like she'll bring out some surprise guess. I'm sure. Who's big? Well, work, work, work, work is Drake, right? I bet she'd have, I bet she'd have drink. I bet she'll do Drake. I bet she'll have Kid Rock will come out. I put your picture away.

Yeah, he's going to sing that song. Yeah, no one's going to be happy. No, I put your picture away. Yeah. Sat down and cried today. That song he does with Cheryl Crow I can't you You will get you

Rihanna halftime show will stop Kid rock and Cheryl Crow Come out on stage Yep Sing his two a so sad Slow and then the And then whack Wag wag

Wag wag And get back to the regular schedule programming, yes By the way she absolutely has a body of work that could cover a halftime 100%. You're an idiot I mean any

But stop any person on the street And ask them to name seven Rihanna songs and they could do it. It's like, I just love... It just goes to show because Adele publicly said she's going to the Super Bowl

literally just so that she can see Rihanna Live. I love it. And I had no idea until I read this article that talk about a glowing fan and I love how much Adele glows about Rihanna. I don't know if she knows her in person, but apparently for Time 100 in 2018,

it was like different people that were nominated wrote about other people. And she wrote about Rihanna. The progression of her superstardom feels steady, well-deserved, and extremely natural. She has designed and conquered an entire lane of her own. The innovative

and groundbreaking world of Rihanna that no one else will ever be safe in and get away with copying. She makes her own rules and bends ours. And then she went on to call Rihanna, gracious, loyal, and funny goofball of an icon. She's fearless and full of all the right kind of attitude to be

everything that she is and will be forever. Can you imagine someone writing that about you, I would cry until I die. What a glowing thing to say about a human being. Yeah, usually. It's a lizard and a worm. This boy's so great, I can't believe I find him funny.

I fucking hate Holden so much. The back end of it is for me or so. I just laugh every time. It's just like, wow, he annoyed the piss out of me for many years. But then, after a while, I was like, wow, this guy's kind of fun. I was really rubbed all the way down to a nub of a human being. And I was like,

okay, maybe how did I go? He's a fucking piece of shit, and he sucks ass and he eats shit and he's dumb. But he says a funny word whatsoever. He sucks ass and he eats shit. By the way, speaking of Beyonce, hit me with the share. Do you believe it? Oh, is it a deep state controversy? No.

Is Jay-Z a virgin? Oh, my God. Okay. He's not willing to go into the deep state if you know what I mean. They have children. I know, but we're scratching the bottom of the barrel. Okay, all right. Let's hear it.

This one comes in from D.Q. Let's hear it. Who says, hi, Jackie, MJ Holden. This has been a reoccurring joke in my friend group for some time and decline in popularity. But with the latest Beyonce album, it has reentered the zeit guy. So without further ado, I would like to ask, is Jay Z a virgin? This is great.

And that's it. And that's the, no, I'm just kidding. Jay Z's 2009 single on to the next one. Contains the lyric. No, I'm not. not a Jonas brother. I'm a grown-up. No, I'm not a virgin. I use my cahones. My friends and I thought this is a weird and overly defensive thing to say coming from a man who notoriously sings about dealing drugs and his strip club experiences. I have since noticed many other lyrics that lead me

to believe he is not as sexually active as he would like us to think. Girls, girls, girls, from Jay Z's 2001 released the blueprint. And that, he says, put your number on this paper, because I would love to date you. Hala at me when I come off tour. This race. is the questions such as, why can't he fuck on tour? This is not the only time he rap slash sings about being dismissive with women. On Watch the Throne, his album with Kanye West, JZ writes, popping bottles, putting supermodels in the cab, proof I got my swagger back, truth. One might assume this means that he is getting in the cabs with them and often,

but consider the Jay Z might have just bought them a ride home because he didn't want to sleep with them, but didn't want to seem like an asshole. Also on Watch the Throne, he says, Earth is boring to him. Shit is making my dick soft. When you earn as hard as me, eventually you hit a big wall. An obvious reference to his limp dick syndrome. Wow.

Bay's newest album, Renaissance, contains the lyrics such as, Baby, you can hit this, don't be scared. And can I sit on top of you? I want to go where nobody's been. Have you ever had fun like this? With this new information, it is plausible that Jay-Z and Beyonce might have made up the rumor. that he cheated on her because he thought it would be more embarrassing to admit he doesn't fuck. What is the...

Okay, keep going. No, MJ. Soak it in like a sponge, okay? I'm almost done here. There is more evidence, but this is already really long, and I think this is enough for you to decide for yourself. Jackie, thank you for being the wild woman representation we need to deserve. Love you. Oh, God, speaking of...

Oh, great. This is a perfect example. Holden, my brother and I love Whizbrew. My mom once said, you are bruised. that looks don't matter. Why is their mother getting involved? Why is their mother getting involved? Oh my God.

That's most subconsciously been why I brought it up. Oh, my God, so funny. Oh, my God, so funny. I will say, which is the closest she's ever come to giving someone a compliment. So that's nice. That's apparently a big deal. Oh my God, so funny. MJ, you are right all of the time.

Most importantly, that little mermaid is annoying and that Pete Wince is not as hot as we all were led to believe. I've been listening to you guys since Roundtable and look forward to the show every week, Heart DQ. What do you guys think? I'm weeping with laughter.

And by the way, I'm not asking anybody to stop. And I don't want you to feel bad for me at all. Looks don't matter. I don't want anyone to feel bad for me or like, hit me. I'll be like, no, pookie, you're pooky, pooky, Luke. I don't need it. He hates it. I don't need it.

When anyone is nice to him. It's funny. And, but it is very, happens a lot. It is very all the time for this guy. Never a clean. There's never, it's never, it's never a clean compliment. It's never a pure compliment. It's always rooted in like, despite your ugliness.

And the timbre of your shit voice, you've somehow managed to have a career in a show that I even listen to. It's like cool, man. I have to believe from this person. I have to believe from this person. I love who is very much. I don't believe it. I'll never believe.

He has children. They look like him. Yes, my first question is what about the children? But of course, we know the children can be created without any P-N-V. Ripped out and squirt it in. Shove a turkey baster full of his jizz into Beyonce. Doesn't mean he's never come. come before.

No, not at all. I love conspiracy theories that are rooted in song lyrics and when people and all the citations come from the lyrics so I really, really love this for that. I also love that they're like, he must be a virgin because in that one song he was like, I'm not a virgin, which is really defensive.

I also really love it because like the whole drunken love era was just like look at how much they fuck, you know. Right. So I love the idea that it's like, actually, that whole song isn't about them fucking. It's about them not fucking.

Right. Well, for half a second, I got scared because you did at least say speaking of Beyonce, but then for half a second I was like, oh, or is this one big joke about me not having ever fucked because I'm also Jay-Z? So then I got scared for a second because I didn't want everyone to know the truth. Well, I think we learned earlier in this episode that you have fucked. Yeah, we've heard you taste and disgusting cum and high stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Feeling like that's just the norm.

And still, by the way, MJ, most people would be like, oh, wow, that's gross. I never want to taste calm again. Not jacking. It was like, oh, this is just what it is. No, I'm going after the glory. I was like, it can't all be this bad. No, people wouldn't be like, I never want to taste calm again. People would just be like, I guess this is my lot in life, you know.

Yep. I'm a receptacle. Not to be a receptacle. Not to be a receptacle, but that if you like to, you know, SD, then that's a receptacle. That's what comes with S&D. And if you don't know that men can be healthier than that, you know, then you just don't know what you don't know. All right.

I'm going to throw up. I'm going to throw up. MJ, what do you think? Do you believe? I believe, yes. I believe. Wow, the jays, both you are sold the jays of work. Yep.

You did it. This is the most, maybe one of the most unbelievable slitting is good. I think it's great. You're convinced. I think you're just happy about what DQ's mother said. He ain't not the time to take drawer. off, Holden, so maybe he just dry humps. That's true.

And not the time to take drawers off. Yeah, good for him. Well, it's time for the list. Oh, who's on the list? Dead Tons. Got to have that list. No, I promise. I'm not going to continue on with the other list, but apparently

Benji was shot in the head and Binchie 3. Benher was not kind to the animals. I will throw that out there. No, I'm talking about 15 times celebrities did weird, inexplicable crap at awards shows. It's a timely list. Now, we all remember when Trey Parker and Matt Stone went to the Oscars. They had taken LSD and they were wearing dresses. We all, that's a given.

I was totally going to bring them up earlier when I was talking about how boring award shows were because my favorite part of that story was they were like, the red carpet was amazing. We were tripping balls in these dresses. It was crazy. but then we walked in the theater and sat down and had to sit through the Oscars. The entire Oscars. That is like exactly the example I was going to bring up for like how they're horribly boring. Yes. And that's like, well, I, that's why you don't do psychedelics and go to a place where you have to sit and not be allowed to get up.

That's just a given. Right. We all know not to do something like that. And also we all should know not to do something like what Outcast did at the 2014 Grammys. CBS said sorry for Outcast performance, which included feathers and face paint. The Native American Cultural Center asked people to boycott CBS, Outcast, and the National Academy of Recording Arts and Sciences. But that obviously did not happen. But what did happen was, I remember this kiss from the 2015 Oscars, when John Travolta slowly goes and gives Scarlet Johansson a kiss on the cheek that seemed like it was.

unasked for and unwanted. Is he the most awkward person at an award show? Adel Dazim. Adel Dazim. Remember when he said Adel Dazim for Adela Dazim? How you saying? Adela Zazim. I think that he must be so not around people very much.

Or like, he's never around someone that doesn't know who he is. That's got to fuck with your brain at some point. Right? That's got to make you a weird human being. Besides the Scientology. Have you ever known somebody who's just like very, very, very hot? They're like a normal person, but they're very hot and they're so hot that they never really learned how to talk to people. Dude, a hundred percent.

I know one person. He looks like an Adonis. And he, nicest guy you'll ever meet, but he just didn't quite understand social interactions. And I'm like, yeah, because he's just like a meathead. Like you could carve him out of stone. And no one's ever talking to them like a normal person because they're, They're so hot that they don't learn how to talk like a normal person. Yeah, absolutely.

Right. Yes. We were just talking about someone who was kind of like that with us recently where you're like, oh, I think this kind of person just floats through life is just so like hot to other people that they just don't ever understand how obnoxious they are in a, especially after a lot of drinking. Yes. And then all of a sudden you're just like, but you're so hot.

Right. But like I'm annoyed by you? Can that be? That's the whole 30 rock episode too with. what's his name, with, um, uh, madman guy. Yeah, right. John Hamm. Yeah.

John Hamm. It's like he sucks in everything, but everyone treats him like he's great. Yes, exactly. And everything. Yeah. But, wait, also speaking of, uh, Adel Dazim, did you guys see the Grammy win for the guy who, who announced it for Assassin's Creed Valhalla? And he was like, the Grammy goes to Valhalla.

He like had no idea. That's really good. I said it. Assassin's Creed Valhalla winning a. an award, by the ones. I don't know. At the Grammys? Maybe the sound design?

Yeah. You must be. But I will send it to you because it's very satisfied. You know. All right. Here's what you do if you're going to present an award. Know how to say the five different candidates, the nominees's name. Yeah.

Just practice it a couple times. Just a couple times. Look at the card. I mean, I do that if I'm unsure about someone's name and I'm just going to like meet them for the first time. You know what I mean? I say I ask. Yeah.

Or at least. Ask Valentino before you put on the dress. 1997 Oscars Jenny McCarthy. McCarthy wore a Valentino dress, but it was on backwards. Really? She felt like a million bucks until Valentino told her, and she never got dressed by him again. Oh, out.

She had the dress on backwards. I mean, it looks great on her, but, you know, at the same time, that I would be, I would die from embarrassment. Yeah. Did you say Jenny McCarthy? Jenny McCarthy. Yeah. Well, we can.

we can let her die of embarrassment. Just kidding. We can let her feel some embarrassment. Wow, MJ. I'm not telling them they were to death. No. We're sentencing Nicole Kidman to clapping school.

I do remember this from the 2017 Oscars. Oh, my God. But when Nicole Kidman clapped with her fingers out. What was that again? She had very expensive rings on. She had borrowed rings and she was worried about hurting them

so she had her fingers splayed out while she clapped because she was worried about but she did look like an alien. Can I actually straight up back that up? I was listening to Nicky Glazer podcast was a long time ago, but she attended an award show

with borrowed very expensive jewelry. She was clapping all night, damaged the jewelry, had to pay thousands of dollars to the stylus. So, of course it makes sense. It actually will fuck the jewelry up and it's like really fancy, nice shit.

Yeah. And it's all borrowed. Like all of this. stuff is borrowed, right? It's all, you know, you give it back. And she damaged it so bad. It was irreparable, and she had to spend thousands of dollars to... Oh, my God.

Yeah. So, yeah, I mean, that's... I just be like, I'm good. I'm just going to wear something I've got. I don't want to destroy it. Something borrowed and something blue or whatever. Shop in a wedding dress. Show up to a wedding dress to the board show.

I could show up in my own wedding dress because my wedding dress was black. Yeah, that is true. I can wear it wherever I want, which is why I did that. And you imagine me just showing me just showing. up in a white wedding dress, though. Like, this is me now, everyone. I'm going to wear a big flowing gown. And on the front, she's going to say, Beyonce, I am sorry.

Oh, that's going to be really good. Where are you going to wear it? On the back, it's going to say, I am proof that looks don't matter. Quote, DQ's mom. Underneath it. For some reason, the 2021 Billboard Music Awards, Machine Gun Kelly dyed his tongue black. That's cool.

And then he used a Q-tip to apply the dye and it stayed put while they kissed and made out on the red carpet. The one thing that makes me sad is that I wish it didn't stay and that while he was kissing Megan Fox on the red carpet, she just had like black smear all over her face. And I think that that would be a lot more fun. That would be fun. We can't forget, unfortunately, from the 2000 Oscars when Angelina Jolie and her brother James Haven kissed on the lip. What's grosser that or we just fucked in the limo? I think this is great. I think kissing your brother on the lips in front of people is grosser than having banged in the limo.

It was the way they talked about it fucking in the limo though. It wasn't that they fucked in limo. It was the way they were like, I hate when people are like, we've got the secret to love and no one else knows it. And we're above everyone else. It's having each other's blood. Yeah. That's it. I'm going to get, I need to get a vial of Jeff's blood.

Yeah, and you should take it directly from his engorgeed people. penis too. Oh my God. Yeah. You need his penis blood. Yeah. I like that. So take a little needle to his penis next time you guys are about to have sex. Okay.

Yeah. I can do that. Does anyone else think that Angelina Jolie's brother looks a lot like Machine Gun Kelly? Or is it just because they're right next to each other? A little bit as if Machine Gun Kelly like Angelina Jolie had a kid because he also looks a lot like Angelina Jolie, which I think is what makes it so disturbing. Yeah. So it looks like they're staring in like a mirror of each other. But their lips are locked.

She said it was just brotherly. It's just like a brotherly thing. Yeah, it's brother stuff. I mean, all of us have brothers. How often you kissing your brothers on the lips? Yeah, well, we touch elbows. We do a lot of elbow touching. I barely touch Henry.

Yeah. Like, well, you're not a touchy, but you're not a very touchy with most, except for the one. You and I are similar in that way. I'm very touchy with Lexi. That's about it. Yeah, I don't touch anybody else. Jackie and I, I could probably count on two hands how many times Jackie and I have actually made physical contact.

We literally work together constantly. Yeah, we sit next to each other all the time. I'm so glad you're not a hugger. I get, that's so awkward to me. Every time we see each other we hug. Hey, big hug. Oh, I missed you, Jackie. Well, we see each other six days out of the weeks

around my Jackie. Ew. Ew. Or, you know, like some people, and I love these people. I'm just not one of them. The people who like, when you talk to them, they like reach out and grab your hands. I'm always like, ah, you know, like I have like, yes.

And I don't even dislike it. It's just such an alarming thing to me. I have to that adjust to it. And I'm like, oh, this is nice. You're touching me in a nice way. Yeah, my problem is every time someone does that, I go, it's something unholy. Oh, we yo, we yo.

And they're like, all right, we're leaving. That's good to see you. Yes, I understand. MJ and I shared a room for a month and we don't. I think I touched you maybe once. We hugged because we hadn't seen each. We hug to say hello. A hug hello for the week is fine.

Yes. For the week. No, it's not like a hug every time you came back to the room. Yeah, exactly. It's so good to see you again. It's time for our hug. Last but not least, I'm bringing this up because I didn't know about the latter part of this. Bjork made in a huge impression when she showed up wearing a dress that looked like a swan.

But what I did not know at the 2001 Oscars is that she had. eggs that she laid as she walked down the carpet. That's awesome. And I think that this, thank God Lady Gaga came and, like, brought it back. But the lampooning of her killed red carpet fun for several years. Yes. I thought that this dress ruled. I thought it was super cool.

And I was fun. And I was that this is when I was like, I just don't get it. I don't get fashion because, like, yes, it's ridiculous, but it's fun. And it's, and it's something different. And it's funny. And that's obviously she's having fun with it. Who was like, oh, Bjork, this is too weird for Bjork. Like, have you ever heard a Bjork song?

Of course she's going to be weird. Unfortunately, I was like, I love Joan Rivers and stuff, but I feel like this was a big misstep for her, like, shitting all over Bjork for this. I don't know. Again, I'm not a fashion guy, though, so I'm sure anybody could sit down. Like, at the top of the cut of it and the bonga. I just like the fact that she laid eggs,

and I can't believe I didn't know that she laid eggs the entire time. And that amazing that Lady Gaga literally entered a red carpet in an egg. So people thought it was cool. You know what I mean? Remember the meat. The meat suits not on here. I love the meat dress. All of that was great.

Because people loved the meat dress. That's why it's not on here. You know what I mean? And you know, we should on Madonna every so often here on the show because she's getting a little weird or in her old age. But she had a great night at the Grammys. Kim Petrus thanked her for like being, you know, the LGBTQ icon that she was. And, you know, she definitely looks a little bit.

odd, but I was happy to see Madonna out and about and not just making her weird TikTok videos, and I still want to give her, you know, the reverence that she deserves. I mean, she is about to go on tour, so I think that she kind of has to be out and about now. Yeah. There you go.

She's got to get back into reality. She's glying back to popularity. And I've got to get back to seeing because I think I'm going. Blind! Items! Oh, we can't see them! This Egot winner doesn't even use as

own skin care products. Oh, fuck. We didn't even bring up the fact that Viola Davis became an EGOT winner. I like that she announced on stage too. Everybody was like, yeah, she was like, I just EGOT. Which is a fucking amazing. Congratulations, Viola Davis. I just want to, oh my God. Audio book, too, right? It was for her audio

book. It wasn't televised either, I believe. No. But the revolution won't be. Whoa. Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you. Well, it's not her. It's someone fucking else, Jackie, whatever. This EGOT winner doesn't even use his own skincare products. So that should tell you something.

Oh, he's his last, oh, man, you know what I mean? Just guess. You know what I mean? Okay, just guess it. John Legend? Yes. He has a skincare product? He recently put out his new skin care line, loved one, like loved zero one, now available

at thousands of CVS stores, but he don't use it. Oh, my God. Of course he doesn't use his own skin care stuff. He's got millions of dollars. He's going to spend that money on, like, skincare products. products are, when you get in there, they're insanely expensive. If it's, like, readily available at a CVS, it's definitely probably more of a, like, budget line of skincare product, as opposed to what he can afford.

I've just gone down this whole, like, looking for Christmas gifts for Lexi and realizing, like, wow, this tiny vial of skin care product is hundreds of dollars. Yeah. Oh, yeah. So I'm pretty sure he's buying really fancy stuff. What do you guys think? Because he think he's bad. Let's shit on him.

John Legend? No, I think John Legend. I think he's good. I don't know, but I don't, I've never really looked into John Legend before. Yeah, I have no problem with John Legend. I think he seems nice. I just want to get you guys to be like catty or whatever, whatever.

Oh, yeah, John Legend, bow, wow. Yeah, there you go. Send the emails to Jackie, not me for this stuff I said about Beyonce. Is it a lifestyle choice from the muse slash actress to purchase a tiny mice-filled apartment, or is it, and I spent all my money on drugs, so it is all like an afford thing. Jesus.

She's a mute. Julia Fox. Yeah, that's the only like real muse, I feel like. Muse just means I don't actually do anything. I'm somehow a celebrity. I was going to say, it kind of insulted to call someone a muse slash actress. At this point. Well, she had her TikTok went viral of her, like, showing her small New York apartment

because she doesn't want her kid to get, like, a big head about having money. She claimed she did this for her son, Valentino. By the way, if you don't want to, if you want to humble your kid, don't name them Valentino. I don't want him to go out. Oh, yeah, I'll do your, I like your version. I don't want him to go up to be like a fucking prick. You know what I mean? I want them to be in touch with the fucking real world

because I grow up at the real world, believe it or not, I just want my son to have the same. And I'm going to write a book, but it's like about my life. But it's not a memoir. It's like a book. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, go to the bookstore. Oh, go to bookstore book store book. I can't. believe that she's writing about her life. What, yeah, what does she have to say? I don't, I have a, by the way, that is the classic, quote-unquote, muse, like, lifelong hot girl thing to do, say you're writing a book and then guess what you do? Not actually write it.

I think she probably sat down twice to write a book, has not thought about it since, but loved talking to people about it at parties about how she's been writing a book. She sat down once, maybe twice to write a book. This is how it goes. By the way, it's not just a hot girl thing. it's a lot of people think. Oh, yeah. The surest sign that you're not actually going to write a book is when you tell a bunch of people

you're writing a book. That's the surest sign because you're trying to get the validation ahead of the accomplishment. Yes. You know what I mean? So you have no actual intention to do it. If you actually want to do something like that, don't tell anybody until you've done it. Because if not, it's actually a psychological thing. You'll give yourself the relief that you did it.

Like, I have this one movie idea that I keep telling people about, and I'm pretty sure I keep telling them about it so that I don't have to actually write it. Yes, that's what I do with my good ideas. Yeah, so then I don't have to actually follow through. And then when somebody comes out with something similar, I get to complain that they stole my idea. That's what I did with Lindsay Lowhands falling for Christmas. Still upset. Still upset.

My idea. That brilliant film concept that led to a million dollar fortune for all involved. Should have been me. That was just a factory churned out idea for it. a Hallmark movie. Good stuff. You promise not to get drunk. Is what the A-list,

everything in her mind celebrity said to her husband. Oh, Jay-Lah. That's what she said. That's what this blind is saying. Whoa. You know, sit up or whatever. You promise not to get drunk. Whoa.

I'd like to watch back at the footage. Yeah, I mean, if you go back and look, I kept Mum's the word when you guys were screaming. Oh, my God, you guys were screaming about it. Oh, God. You're screaming about it. Oh, no. And I was about to say something.

I zip the lip, as I wanted to wait for the blind. But if you do think about it in that context, doesn't he kind of just look like a guy who's been like day drinking all day and now has to sit through an award show? Yes, he definitely does. Where he's unable to drink. Yes. So he's just sort of like slowly sobering up and like tired and just like grumped out.

I still think he does also just kind of have resting sad face. Sad face. I think so too. You know, that's his M.O. And the blinds always is that he's always, like, falling back into the drinking hole. And I could see doing that ahead of a word show you're not really looking forward to accompanying your wife to.

I would get blasted. Yeah, he probably whispered to her, I'm so drunk. I'm getting a headache. Could we leave? And then she said, you promised you wouldn't drink. And then she was like, fuck, Trevor Noah was sitting right next to me. Right next to her.

And what if I'm going to be watching this clip all day. It's going to be JFK over here. Unbelievable. All right, well, I think you guys guessed it all, which means you unlocked the curse and I'm allowed to see again. Thank you so much for doing that. So the curse is your sight?

The curse is my lack of sight. Yes, but also seeing sometimes can be a curse in context. Sometimes you see things, Tubgirl, stuff like that, you see things you don't want to. You've been bringing up Tub Girl a lot recently. Did you watch? Yeah, did you watch? Do you look at it recently?

No, I haven't seen Tub Girl since the one time I saw Tub Girl. but you were that affected by it. I guess it's my go-to example because it's more innocuous than some of the darker examples I can bring up and yet it's such a funny phrase and everybody knows what it is unless you don't know what it is. There's also lemonparty.org though. If you'd like to get involved in politics,

Lemonparty.org is still up. I think you guys made me go to lemonparty.org recently. I do. You do. You're very interested in local government, local policies. It's a really good way to get in on the ground for lemon party. Don't let's hold it.

He's proof. Looks don't matter. Do it. All right, please. Come on. Thank you guys. So much for joining us on this week's episode of page seven. My name is Jackie Zabrowski.

You can follow me on the Instagram at Jack That Worm. You can follow us over on page seven LPN on the TikToks and come hang out with me over on Twitch. Twitter. It's, oh, no, it's Jackie on Sundays and on Tuesdays and on Wednesdays. we play Sims. And also pretty soon, hopefully we're going to have some bucket hats over on big jacky.com.

Oh my God. So that we can all join the bucket hat revolution. Good Lord, ladies and gentlemen. Also, follow us. Please write in to page 7 podcast at gmail.com, page number seven podcast at gmail.com. Someone said, hey, why don't you just get page the word seven podcast at gmail.com and just have all the emails forwarded into page seven podcast at gmail.com. If someone wants to do that for me, let me know.

I refuse I'm too lazy. Also, but please send in. If someone wants to do that for me. Well, again, looks don't matter. All right. What do you don't do that? Someone say it looks too bad at me because I'm also lazy and stupid. Please, I'm some of what I just said.

So all of it, none of it matters at this point. Nothing matters. None of it matters. What else? Yeah, but please write it. with your conspiracy theories and your blind items. They're incredibly useful to be, especially the conspiracy theories. So keep them coming, guys.

I mean, just hot stuff. Jay-Z-a-Virgin, unbelievable stuff. I mean, we believe. I don't want to call you guys a couple of stupid idiots. We believe. But he's definitely had sex before. I guarantee, by the way he talks about it in his songs, the fact that he has children. You know, I don't know, though.

I want to see it to believe it. All right. Where's that tape? Show me the tape. The Tate. Also, please check us out on Patreon. Patreon.com forward slash page 7 podcast. It is such a great destination. We've got so much bonus content.

Five bucks a month. You get all that bonus content. Right now we are switching to a new show because we finished Jersey Shore. We're going to find out what that new show is soon. But for $10 a month, you can join us over on our Discord for our weekly watch-alongs. It is an incredible crew of people that we get to hang out with every week. and us, we are there too. So check us out. Patreon.com,

for page 7 podcasts, I even mention for $5 a month ad free episodes. Yes. If you want to skip all that and get us just here the pure show, you will at the $5 layer, page 7 podcast on Patreon. MJ!

My name is MJ, Holden, I can't believe we didn't bring up that there's another foot guy on Milf Manor. We're going to have to talk about that next week. Did you see that there's a dollar? It didn't even bring up. No, wait. There's another foot guy. There's another guy who likes feet.

It's Billy. Okay. I was so wine hammered when I watched it on Sunday night. I have to be red wine. Because I have to, it's how it becomes impenetral to me. So it does, because then I'd be throwing up every 10 minutes if I was. But the wine helps you not throw up? Yeah, yeah.

It gives me and it kind of numbs it all, numbs me up. Two people who want to suck feet on that show, Jimmy and Billy. So that's my name. And all of the. Sons are also gay. So there's that element as well. Of course I keep thinking about that now and I keep thinking, I'm like, maybe that is what another twist is going to be. I think at least half of them.

Right? Right? Right. But anyway, you can see this and other Miltf news on my Instagram, which is M.JKLKT.com. I mean, not dot com. What am I saying? Dot com. Jesus Christ, M.J.

I got all scrambled thinking about Milf Manor and the feet. Everybody's tagging me for my looks and the sound of my voice. Can we attack MJ for living in the stone age or something? Like, what is it happening? H-TTP colon slash. You can instant message MJ on AOL if you like. Crafty Bernard was my screen name on that. Why was it?

Crafty Bernard. It was from a Wu-Tang name generator. Oh, fuck yeah. Why, you just like childish Gambino. That's amazing. I know. See, I am just like childish Gambino. Rafi Bernard is the most MJ Wu-Teg generated name ever.

Bernard. I should bring it back. But anyway, that's an M.J.K.L. Kat on Instagram. All right. Bye. Oh, yeah. Bye. No, it's a shout-out song.

Oh, now we do the shout-out side. No, I like getting on. Bye. Bye. Why? Oh, my side hurts. All right. The shout-out song.

Shout out. Shout, let it all out. These are the emails that you wrote it about. Come on, we're going to read it up to you. Come on. Oh, gosh, thank you guys so much for your shoutouts every week, and you can send in your own shoutouts to page seven podcast at gmail.com. That is page seven, seven the number podcast at gmail.com,

and you can send us absolutely whatever you'd like. and I do mean what... I definitely want to say thank you to everyone that shouted out there, City for our tour dates. You guys are helping us so much. Thank you so much, and we are passing along the info to our big, scary people, and hopefully they listen to us, and we're not just shouting into the wind,

but you never know, and you always got to try with your best positive foot forward. And can I just also say I had no idea that I needed to go to Santa Fe and Tacoma and y'all have sent in such juicy wrecks for your city. And I just wanted to particularly thank Aaron and Jenny because I had no idea that I wanted to go to both Santa Fe and Tacoma. I just want to go there in my regular life now. But anyway, on to our shoutouts.

And oh my God, this is such a DQ day. And I'm not talking about Dairy Queen. DQ, remember DQ, who sent in the JZ conspiracy theory, also wrote in a shoutout. DQ day and I'm so happy. DQ says, I still feel a little weird writing in about myself, but I have to because I really made 22 my bitch. 22 got off to a terrible start. I started a brand new job, but I was struggling with my confidence and my motivation and focus, moved back home and was feeling stuck and friendless. But my job and the supportive people that came with it,

spending time outside, and my friends really changed that. In the spring of 2022, I started running outside. I have no idea why. I have to shout out page seven and all of LPN because they were a huge help on the difficult days. I listened to probably days and days of podcasts while running, and I always look forward to my Friday run so I could listen to the new page seven. Over the summer, I ran two 10-mileers and a half marathon. I also met so many new friends at work, too many to name, but shout out to them too, and hiked over 200, miles with them and alone last year. It completely changed my body image and my sleep and really helped with my mental health. Also, after managing my mental health issues alone since I was a kid,

I finally connected with a therapist and psychiatrist who understood my depression and anxiety and unlocked that they were secondary to ADHD. ADHD often presents differently for women, so I had never considered it, and I didn't think enough women know the symptoms. Between spending time outside and being appropriately medicated, oh, yes, DQ! My whole internal monologue has changed. At the end of the year, I graduated engineering school, landed my dream job that makes me feel like I'm doing my small part in protecting the environment

and bought a horse who is already my whole world. Thank you for encouraging people to celebrate themselves on the show and for the rest of your hard work. Oh my God, Dicue, I'm so happy for you. Thank you so much. much for sharing this. Jackie, enjoy the rest of Wild Woman Winter. M.J. and Holden can participate too, I guess. I've been listening for years, and it's only gotten better. You guys are the best. You're the fucking best, DQ. And thank you so much for your Jay-Z conspiracy theory.

On top of the fact of changing and sending in what amazing changes you've brought to your life, because it's so hard to start. And it's even harder to keep going. And I'm so fucking proud of you. Fuck yeah. I love a write-in shout-out like this. Thank you. You just like inspired me for the rest of my week. Fuck yeah. I hope D.Q inspired you too. And speaking of amazing people who are moving onwards and upwards, we've got an update from the lovely Jeanette. Jeanette says just a quick update on my move. Work is amazing and I just got an amazing apartment right across the street. This is my first time as a city girl and I am loving it. Rewatching Gossip Girl so I can channel my inner Blair Waldorf. as I walk the streets. Mostly I wanted to write in to say, come to Seattle. We need some page seven love. Also, just a quick shout out

to our entire community who seems to be really killing it in 2023 so far, and I can't wait to hear more about it in the shoutouts. I hope your time on tour was fantastic, and you get lots of rest and gets to love on your babies,

human and fur alike. Thank you so much, Jeanette, and so much love to you. And it does. I can feel the power of our community growing this year. Can you feel it through your ears? Am I being too positive right now?

I don't know, but I think that I need it and hopefully you need it too. Anyway, I just also want to say thank you so much to Allie, who shouted out this show that I feel like I thought that I've been watching this show in a fever dream. Ali says, so I was roaming through my prime channel looking for something to watch and found this show that was amazing. It's probably more of a Jackie or I'm Jthing. You're so right, Ellie. but if you're in the mood to snuggle on the couch and feel poor for a couple of hours, then please check out Bespoke Inns.

It's from the Magnolia Network, and it airs on Discovery Plus. Damn, that chip and Jojo when they're making me want things I can't afford. All I can think of now is how I need to rob a bank so I can zip down to Napa and stay in a former hospital that looks like a French chateau. I just want to say thank you, Allie. Your review of bespoke ins is so fucking funny. And I immediately texted MJ because I've watched this show by myself before. And now we both need to be watching it. And I'm so excited to talk with them about it.

Thank you so much, Allie. And you guys should do if you want to feel poor for a couple hours, put on bespoke ins. I love you guys so much. And thanks for just. put me into a great headspace. And by y'all being in great headspaces, and even if you're not in a great headspace, you're welcome to write in because we can encourage you to get through it.

Our community is amazing. I love you guys so much, and I will, oh, I'll talk to you guys next week. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors, you can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com. Thank you.