Page 7 - Ep. 521: Can I Show You My Gape?

Episode Date: February 1, 2024

This week we're gossin' 'bout the fact that Jackie H A T E S that she's talking to MJ "Literature Person" Knefel and Holden "Football Man" McNeely instead of gettin' lost in a tale of lust and revenge, book talk up talk with Crescent City book 3 droppin' this past Monday and brief talk on American Nightmare (Jackie recommends) after MJ reveals they're a beach read bitch, Taylor is headin' to the Superb Owl and some Football talk around 12:10, but if you skip it you'll miss how the Dems have weaponized Taylor Swift in a plot against the GOP to radicalize football fans to Vote4Joe, Hillary Pokemon Goes and gives her opinion on the Barbie Scandal, Nicki Minaj and Megan Thee Stallion BEEF TALK, Ruby Rose gets death threats because people thought she was Rubi Rose and Nicki thanks Ben Shapiro for teaming up with WHITE BOY himself Tom MacDonald to aurally assault the world, the Mark Norman standup show being stopped turns out to be a PR stunt and so was the furry attack on Tyra Banks, a preview of what we'll be talkin' 'bout on LEFTOVERS, and in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner: These personal celeb anecdotes from listeners!!! Da List, BLINDZ and SHOUTS!! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast  Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Since this played on an episode of Jackin a couple of weeks ago, it's been stuck in my head. Ecstasy. E, E, E, E, ecstasy. She's a naughty girl with a bad habit, a bad habit for drugs. She's a party girl with a bad habit, a bad habit for drugs. And do I need to watch Summer Heights High again? I don't know. If you haven't watched Summer Heights High, it is not for everybody.

I absolutely love it. And it has one of the best songs of all time, which is she's a naughty girl with a bad habit, which yes was a song that was played during a high school musical that the teacher wrote for them to do. So about a kid who died, who overdosed.

Who overdosed? She's a naughty girl with a bad habit. So they do a whole musical on it. It's such a fun show. Yeah, it's great. It's dark. It's fucking crazy. It's very dark.

It's very funny. Wow. It's so good. So I just, so I'm feeling it today. Welcome to page seven. And maybe, you know, I am feeling, I said this to Holden and MJ earlier. And I apologize, I'm going to say it again. I love you both, but I hate the fact that I'm talking to both of you right now because Crescent City 3 was released last night.

And we had a great Akatar stream about it. Oh, did we gabs about it? We had so much fucking fun. And now I have to talk about other things. I don't care about anything else. All I want to be doing is reading Crescent City right now. I love you both. But fuck off.

I'm Logan Roy now. I think it's sweet that you are so enthusiastic about reading. I was saying to you, it reminds me of how Harry Potter got all the youth so excited about reading. And this horny lady is doing the same for horny ladies. Did you sit in the car out front of the book release? at Barnes & Noble doing bumps of cocaine before you picked up your copy. That is my question. I will say there was a lot less cocaine at this book release and a lot more, well, I mean,

don't worry, the bong rips were the same amount. But all the cocaine was gone, which is why I couldn't stay up. I finally landed in my Kindle at midnight. I read one chapter past, I read, because Sarah had dropped the prologue and the first chapter on Friday, so I'd already read those. So I read the second chapter, and then I fell asleep. And this is where I'm just sitting here. I need it. I need it in my veins.

How beefy are we talking? How beefy is this book? What are we looking at here? What's the page count? Oh, she's a big. She big and thick. I see a book like that. Gideon has all the Game of Thrones books and everything, and I see it. And I'm just like, I feel, I always felt a little bit bad as a kid because I was like, I loved reading, of course. But like, I was a kid that if you like, I was never like, I would rather choose to read than like watch Save by the Bell.

Like I always like wanted to watch TV more than I wanted to read, which makes, which made me feel like a like a naughty kid, you know. And so I, and I see these big ass books. Gideon's watching Lord of the Rings with the kids. And I'm just like, I don't, it's too long. No, so you got to change your head about it, MJ. It's all about getting lost.

Yeah. Indulching in this world. So the bigger, the better when it comes to those Game of Thrones books because you're like, oh, I choose. just get to be totally immersed in this other place that's not the subway. That makes sense because I also hate finishing books. It's sad to finish a book because then I'm like, oh, no, now what? It's the same like finishing a series.

And so maybe I should embrace the 600 page. Yeah, and same with the movies. Fantasy. Oh, this is 900. Nine hundred pages. It's like, yeah, with the movies too, with Lord of the Rings extended, I wanted them to be extended. And I wanted to watch all the special features because I just wanted to. stay in that world with those actors and those characters and, you know, all that great music

and all that great model work and everything. You just want to, you know, just be this... Living in. I'm happy for you guys. Like I said, I always felt inadequate. I tried to read the Hobbit when I was a kid. Everyone was like, you like reading. Hobbit short. Hobits didn't quit. That's the thing. I was like, borough snoro. I think it's just like my least popular opinion. I will say if... You're, well, hey, I'm bored by history, so we all have our thing. I know, we all have our thing. You're, you're just bored by long books?

You're just, you're failed by a long book? Well, specifically fantasy. Wait, specifically fantasy, you mean you're against the idea of world building? I'm not against it as it. I'm not, I don't think it shouldn't exist, but it's not for me. And this is, I'm married to a fantasy man. MJ and I got this from my own father where it was like, I don't, I don't do sci-fire fantasy. I'm a literature.

Yes, I like literature. I'm not, I don't think I'm better than anyone. Oh, sure. By the way, no one accuse you of that, MJ says it's interesting. You know what to accuse you that, but I feel like you are kind of living in case. Slip a little bit. I'm worse than other people. But I just, like, Gideon mentioned.

wargs in his wedding vows. He's so excited to be talking about the wargs and he's teaching the kids about the wards. And I'm like, I still don't even, it was in our wedding and I still don't know what a warg is. I think it's one of those wolves. It's really kind of more akin to Jackie's lusts. Yeah, it's more like a shing chifter, you know.

Bit of a monster that one might do fucking on. Might have fuck with. I just, don't you guys think, I feel like it's like the people who think cilantro taste like soap. I just, I feel like I was born without the gene. My dad's like this. My dad's like fantasy sci-fi. So I grew up really not at all into it, you know, like, I mean, outside of like Star Wars and stuff, but it wasn't, especially, and he, you know, if you've been to my home or my parents' house, it's like a library in there. There's just books lining like the, there's just bookshelves up to the

ceiling in like multiple rooms. But he's just not a fantasy sci-fi person, you know? And, And so it really got to me later in life. But I think that is what I learned to love about it was like, oh, I don't need to like be metaphored into a lesson today. Totally. Reading should be fun and thrilling. Yeah, I can just enjoy just like being in this place and like being transported to another place. You know what I mean? And then is it a parallel dimension?

Is it time travel? We don't know Crescent City. What is going on? We don't know. We don't know where the portal, how it took her there. How are the books? A lining. That hasn't been spoken in 15,000 years.

I, you know, I understand where you're coming from, MJ. And I think that it is just the opposite for me just because I like to, I like the steep learning curve of fantasy. Like when you're getting into a new series and you're like, okay, I get to learn all the rules of this new world. Yeah, yeah. And I love how every book is different, how it has its own little gems of things of like, okay, well, but then that's the problem is then you get them kind of confused in your head. I mean, don't even get me started on like the meaning of lightning. When I can't compare between fourth wing and Crescent City, I can't because the two books don't,

they don't go ahead. He used to make fun of me when we would watch Game of Thrones because I'd be like, where are the elves? And he's like, there's no elves at Game of Thrones. And I was like, well, it looks exactly like Lord of the. the rings to me. Okay? How dare you? They're all just marching through a field.

It looks the same. Oh, it's snowing. They're marching, not running. That's how you know it's Game of Thrones and not Lord of the Rings. Come on, MJ. Running versus, you know, it's kind of funny. You're actually describing Jackie what I love about, like, video games, like

starting a new, like, big open world video game and like learning all the different mechanics. And I love opening the menus and like going through. all of the menus and seeing, yeah, it's just, I love that shit. But MJ, could you be sold if there is smut in it? Or are you not a big smut reader? We'd never discuss this before. I know.

I should keep trying. I mean, my face, like, listen, the reason I say I don't think I'm better than anyone is because I exclusively read for fun. I had to stop reading nonfiction because I had just slowed down. I was like, oh, I'm reading like a good, informative book. And then I, like, would just not, I would read it so slowly, like, I may as well know the reading. And I had a roommate at the time who was like,

always have one, like, nonfiction book and one fiction book. And so I started just reading fun fiction. And so my exact shit is like big little lies, right? Like that genre, the housewife murder mystery. Which, by the way, I would argue is schlockier than, like, fantasy. Oh, yeah, that's what I'm saying. I'm not standing on any sort of, like, merit in terms of what's good or not. Yeah.

Like, I like the confession, though. I appreciate this. It's not because I'm like, I like the literature. It's not even, I'm not reading William Faulkner. couldn't put Gone Girl down. I really couldn't. It was so strong. It was just such a page turner.

You're a beach read. I'm a beach read, bitch. Anything that has been turned into a movie or a show, like the Carrie Washington show. I read those books. I read all of the, I read big little lies. I read Gone Girl. All of that type of. The husband's secret.

I will also say it's a big secret. The husband's secret was really fucking good. What's the secret? It can't tell you the secret. It's a big, it's a big secret. You wait the whole book. But it's a big secret. And yeah, you know, when you find that out about your husband, you probably got to leave them.

But if you guys like Gone Girl, you should totally watch American Nightmare, which is that Netflix show. I just started there last night. Do you watch? It's, it's pretty great. It's really great. By the way, is the secret? He has a big chair that sits over a cage? It's a bit of an Army Hammer's Dad situation. It's a little Army Hammer's Dad.

What on Netflix? It's called American Nightmare. Oh, yeah, I need to see this. It was around the time of Gone Girl coming out. And they were like, they just straight up, we're like, this is a gone girl murder. It's a gone girl murder. Ah. Because gone girl was so huge.

Yeah, it is interesting to be like, what if an American bestseller influenced like a real life true crime? Cool. It's very interesting. Oh, I'm way in. Yeah, it is cool. American nightmare. I'm way in. Highly recommend.

I guess we talk, we do talk about things that aren't books. I know I'm a little book talk over here. And I'm sorry. I'm inundated right now. I'm also living in the world of dragons because I'm in Iron Flame, which is the second after fourth wing. I'm all over the place when it comes to smut. But I am all on top of the place when it comes to talking about trailer.

And I don't think I like the hyphen, the, I was about to say hibernated. That's not the word. I think a lot of people would wish they would hibernate. I think they wish they would. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Go underneath. It's the, well, I mean, it is ending of winter. The final 10 darkest weeks of the last year and into this year are over.

Thank God. The sun is coming out again. We are, we are, we, it will be nice again soon, guys. But yes, I have to talk about Taylor Swift and Travis Kelsey because they're both going to the Super Bowl. And, you know, good for ha. She doesn't even have to perform at it. I actually watched this last Sunday because I was invested. Oh my God, you watched the game?

Yeah, because... Well, I wanted the Lions to win two, and unfortunately they lost. The Lions have never made it to a Super Bowl ever. And so it was like this crazy... What I wanted to happen was Taylor Swift's Chiefs versus the Lions, because the Lions have historically... The playoff game they won was the first time they won two, but the first one they won was the first time they've won a playoff game in over 30 years.

It's just been this... Look at this football man who's joining us this morning, Jay. Yeah, what is? happening. There were six. I just wanted to see Taylor Swift Chiefs versus the line. So I still get my Taylor Swift Chiefs in the Super Bowl, which I'm excited about. And also though, I just want to throw it out there. GOP, I get it. You're upset. The conspiracy is real.

The powers to be are puppeteering Taylor Swift to win the Biden election in 2024. I get it. You must be so bummed out that this many secret Illuminati organizations are working together, giant statue of an owl or something has happened. Are you ready for it? Yes. Are you ready for it?

And then just a picture of like very old Biden slowly walking into the frame. Oh, God. I mean, you're like, I'm not, but I guess I have to be. Slowly falling on stairs. Is that what I have to be ready for? This is my favorite. MJ, how are you feeling about this year? What do you do?

What do you think about this year? Oh, politically, no, I wish I was dead. But I do think it's horrible. But I do think it's very funny that. Republicans are scared that Taylor will sway the election because I'm on Instagram a lot. And a lot of conservative women love Taylor Swift. And as we talk about all the time, Taylor Swift seems to be pretty clearly, has evolved into somebody with, I think, liberal-ish politics. And also, she is a lady who wants everyone to love her. And so she's in a tough position. I think she very clearly is like not alienating to conservatives. at all in terms of like how many women love her. She's clearly like it's not,

she's not a partisan. To be a Swifty does not mean you're automatically a Democrat, right? Right. How I would love to see how fast the votes came in if she ran for president to with the election. I would love to see just how fucking. I don't want her to be president. No, of course not.

But I vote. But you know I'd vote. That's what. It's just so like this was, I was laughing also about the, I know this is a different story, but Hillary Wade, Hillary Clinton waited on. a Barbie scandal. Oh my God. So funny.

Wow, political trigger warning right up top. Hashtag Hillary Barbie. Please start it off with hashtag Hillary Barbie. Hashtag Hillary Barbie, which, yeah, that's not even how. Hashtag Hillary Barbie. Hashtag Hillary Barbie. Oh, but I was like, that is a sidebar. Just to everyone knows, Hillary Clinton posted on Insta. It just says, Greta and Margo. While it can sting to win the box office, but not take home the gold, your millions of fans love you.

You're both so much more than enough. Hashtag Hillary Barbie. Hashtag Hillary Barbie. So many people are said about somebody. They're just like, this is just so not a real issue right now mixed with. I can't believe you're inserting yourself into this. Even within Oscars discourse. I feel like, you know, I understand why people are upset, of course.

Yeah, it came and it went, though. Right. It was like not even within the exclusively the world of pop culture. It was like, oh, wow, I can't believe like the man got a nomination. And then two of the big women who made the movie, like, successful didn't. Like, interesting. But then for Hillary Clinton to be like, this is like what happened to me. And it's like, I'm not sure you need to enter the chat, Hillary.

Yeah, yeah, that's such a weird one. Also, Crick did get nominated for screenplay. So it's not like they got to. And what's funny is Barbie got nominated a lot. It got Best Movie. It got Supporting Act. Actress. And no one's talking about, by the way, all the women, America for era got nominated.

I don't know. It's a weird thing to make such. It's like, it feels very like, you got to nominate everybody for the movie. It's just like, no, this is not even really an Oscar movie technically on any other year. Which was why it was so cool that it did. I was like, this is not an Oscar movie. It did so much more than it did. Anyone would have thought it would have done.

No one would have thought that Barbie movie would get sweep the Oscars. Totally. And then all of a sudden it's like, you owe us this. It's like, no, no, they don't. That's great. That's insane. I mean, if Margotta Gourke and or both of them at the same time got nominated, I would be like, hell, yeah. Like, I wouldn't be like, totally.

I wouldn't be mad about it. But, like, it's so crazy that it's funny now how, like, everybody just like, when everybody's like, no, this is the cultural shift of things. You were supposed to nominate them all. And then everybody, like, whines about it for a week. You know what I mean? I don't know. It's not how things work.

You don't just like, you can't just complain a thing untrue. Also, I will say if you look at the experience that I would assume that Margot Robbie had while shooting Barbie and then you try to compare it to like Emma Stone and poor things, if you're going to compare what's like the acting performance of two different people and two very different movies, I think it's a lot harder to do what Emma Stone did. Right. What Margo, like, I'm not saying she's not amazing in the movie. But I will say, there's a difference in, you know, like what Lily Gladstone brought to Killers of the Flower Moon than what Margot Robbie brought to Barbie.

I'm just saying, I'm just saying. I think the better take is like, wow, I can't believe Ryan Gosselin got nominated in playing a very not-mascarie. Totally. Totally. The conversation, what it should be. I get that. But I understand why everyone got upset. Totally.

It was really what I love like a. low stakes, but engaging pop culture conversation. Pop culture conversation, yes. And I was like, yes, this is not like a horrific, such a horrifically violent snub of talent that like. Yeah, it's not a man walking on stage and slapping another man in front of an entire room full of people in the entire country. It's not like that.

Or, you know, like, if you look at like the, obviously people spent the last decade talking about the like, you know, generation long disparities in terms of who gets nominated, did what films get recognized, what actors do and don't. So it's not like that stuff isn't important. But yeah, this was one of those things where I was like, Barbie movie was great.

I'm so glad it did so well. It really was like the Ares Tour in terms of like a moment that like everybody coalesced around whether you had, whether you loved it or hated. It was like so cool. And then like, oh wow,

I can't believe like we have a best actor not for Ken. That's really fun. Good for America Ferreira. Great. Interesting that, you know, the two women who also were huge part of it didn't get the nominate.

Like it was like, all fine, you know, and then it was like immediately like all conversation on the internet does lately just like just slipped into the toilet and it was like, hashtag Hillary Barbie, please. Hashtag Hillary Barbie. And that's why I think it's fun to wonder about Taylor Swift somehow spoiling the election for the Democrats because Taylor Swift is somebody who has a lot more popularity than literally any other political figure right now. She's got to be a sciop. There's no way she's not. I love the idea.

that she's a sigh up and that she is being planted to get the American people to do things. I mean, she is. So did you see that she single-handedly, she contributed to a rise in inflation? There's a story today about the Fed and about how they're worried about inflation. And they literally attribute like a percentage points of GDP growth to the ERAs to her. Because she brought sold-out crowds. and like filled up hotels and restaurants and all these different cities. And it is funny how little I know about adult things because MJ sent this article that was talking about the fed's inflation thing.

And I was like, I don't understand what any of this means. Oh, yeah. I was like, is this bad or is this good? I don't know. I had to do a close reading of that one. I was like, okay. Okay, that makes me feel better because I see all these percentages and I'm like, oh, it's, it went from 3.7 and then it went to 3.8. Oh, no.

Like, oh, yes. Right. No, I don't know enough about the GDP either. But I just feel like, listen, I know that you don't want us to talk about her here on page seven. I know that everybody's over it. People don't want to cut to her at the football games. But how interesting that we have our current pop culture diva of the moment is literally shaping the planet with her carbon emissions and her influence on the global economy. I just think you can't.

can help but stand that, you know. Super hero shit, dude, or super villain. Either way, I'm here for it. I just can't believe her boyfriend's going to the Super Bowl. What planet? Her boyfriend's going to the Super Bowl, except at the same time, there are sexually explicit AI images of Taylor Swift that were leaked to the internet. And I'm not saying that's a good thing.

It's a very bad thing, of course. But again, Taylor Swift, one of the most influential people on the fucking planet right now. If she can get some control around A, I'll fucking vote for her, honestly. It's disturbing. It's so weird. No one can get it under control, but maybe she can.

Yeah, it feels like such an unstoppable reality we're now in because it just, anyone can get their hands on this software and distribute anything. But I am hopeful that we can get ahead of it because it feels real fucking gross to me, man, like to take. And I think more or less, I think less about Taylor Swift and I think about women I know in my life. Men, women, anybody. I know in my life. of what they're going to go through, being able to use your, I mean, us with like what we do for a living of using

our voices to say anything. Yeah. And it is so, like, while there's so much fun, like, I mean, I love listening to Henry's AI version of, I think it was, That's Life is what he was singing, which is very fun and very, but creepy in a different way. But I do appreciate that Sciop, Taylor Swift, is hopefully going to be used for good in this way, because sag after then came out and was like, well, that is why we are going to continue

to support legislation by US rep Joe Morel, the preventing deep fakes of intimate images act to make sure we stop exploitation of this nature from happening again. We support Taylor and women everywhere who are the victims of this kind of theft of their privacy and right to autonomy. And so, yeah, use her to get this fucking,

let's get more of these bills. Yeah. Yeah, it's a weird one. And it did make me really upset. I saw one on Twitter. it was honestly more on the innocent side, but just like alluding enough to gross stuff that I was just, I immediately like muted the person on my feet or whatever.

It was just like, ugh. It just made me sick to my stomach to see clearly someone being against their will portrayed and like a really like disgusting, you know, over the top sexual way, you know, that they didn't sign up for. And man, if you want to see stuff like that, I'm telling you, You can find it, man. There is just scenes of just multiple men, women. I'm going to stop you right there.

I don't want to know. Yeah, I don't want to know. All I'm what I do want to say is. You know what is the sexiest thing of all? Consent. And I'm throwing that out there. There is nothing sexier than consent. Yes.

And that is forever. You don't want to look at these. I didn't even look it up. I didn't want to. I didn't want to. Can I show you my gays? Can I show you my games? Can I don't know.

my gape, yes you can. Bronchi, and that is how it should work. But it's... When there's a gronky in the house. Even gronky gets consent and that's how you know that consent is sexy. And consent is the mirror too. I didn't ask to see that fucking picture. Piss me off.

Right. I didn't look for that. Right. I haven't looked at all because it's like, A, it's not real. So what's the... I don't know. I guess I'm at the point. I think I had this conversation with Jake at a point because I'm just like, at the

of the day, all the AI, like, porn stuff, I just, deep down, I have no interest as a human because I know it's not real. And that disconnect makes me in no way, much less consensual. You know what I mean? I would try VR porn though. Yeah, but again, at some point. But VR porn. I'm, I'm intrigued by the idea. But that's different. That's a porn, a actress who, or actor, or who knows who's in there, at multiple actors, multiple actors, a bunch of, yeah, but they're making and they know what They're aware of what they're making. They're filming it in a way so you can enjoy it on VR and then you can get the special penis

pump that connects to the VR rig and it'll move to the motion. I mean, it's the dream, right? That's the dream. Yeah. But the part of it's like... You never have to talk to anyone in real life ever again. I don't know. After walking the plank on

the VR, unseen as VR thing, I'm actually a little afraid of VR porn because I don't know how real that felt, man. Could you imagine fucking on the plank? I feel like I was cheating. I definitely would feel like I was cheating. Yeah, for sure. I did not expect VR to feel as real as it felt.

I really, really did it. Yes, it'll trick. It tricks the mind. It truly tricks the mind. Yeah. I got to get into it. I want to talk beef talk. That's right.

We're talking beef today, baby. Whoa, you're already shifted to beef talk. I'm just itching to get into the Nikki Vennage, Megan the Stalian beef. I love a good hip-hop beef, a good raping beef. But this one's a crazy. Crazy beef. It's a crazy beef. This is a beef that you need to like get on.

You've got to put on your reading glasses. You got to get your stack of books. You got to go back to like 2022. Absolutely. Which is like I felt a little afraid to weigh in on this. I'm just going to disclose. I feel like not. This is not any of our area of expertise.

So we are, you know, take, take what we are about to say with the limits of who we are and where we're coming from. But we got to talk about it because it's obviously the huge historian pop culture right now. I'm first of all getting out, getting ahead of it. If you're listening, I'm afraid of you, Barb's. I'm very scared. I'm very scared. We're not saying anything disparaging about Nikki Minaj.

Yeah, yeah. I kind of feel like right now. I'm scared of her fans. The boys back in the day, her fans are serious. The boys back of the day considered doing an episode on drug cartels and decided not to because of the real-life

implications of doing a series on drug cartels. I'm genuinely scared of talking about Nicky Minaj. It's why we don't usually. Yeah. I still, my name still comes up if you, if I Google, you know, if I don't even have. have an active Google alert of myself anymore.

But back when the Johnny Depp and Amber Heard trial was going on, people were keeping lists of anybody who ever said anything supportive of Amber Heard. And I don't even think I did. We meticulously, like, just kind of didn't really weigh into that discourse on the show. And people kept names of, like, these are the people who support Amber Heard. And that is, like, wild. Yeah, it's crazy. Yeah.

And people are getting doxed and all sorts of stuff. So just want to say, you know what I mean? What's it called Starships? What's the song? Starships! I'm a message of that! What a song. What a song.

What a song. What a song. It's great song, man. It's great. The rest of my life. Superbase. Please don't make me give up Superbase. Good Lord.

You know what I mean? That Barbie track, the credits went up. The Barbie track is great. I don't know. Hell, yeah, it is some great music. Great stuff. But she's going after Megan Mistalia. Yeah, she is going after.

Yeah, but let's get into it. Now that we've gotten that preface out of the way. So it all started with, well, some say it may have started before Megan's track, Hiss, which is like a pretty fierce track, a bit of a disc track, coming out from Megan. And within it, fans, this is the thing that says, this is off of a business insider article. I know who really, business insider too. If you really want to get to the cutting edge of the rap, a rap. Cap culture.

They know. But it says many fans believe she also mocked Minaj in his. But she took aim, it should be noted, she took aim at several unnamed people on the track. So in a way it kind of surprises me to like almost out yourself that hard and be like, you're talking about me. You're talking about chabellusters. You're talking about me. You know what I mean or whatever it is.

Because what you're talking about is there's a line and it says, these hoes don't be mad at Megan, these hoes mad at Megan's Law. I don't really know what the problem is, but I guarantee y'all don't want me to start. Now, I do find it interesting because I think that a lot of people, I would assume I didn't know what Megan's Law was. I would listen to that and not understand that it was a diss, because I had no idea what Megan's Law was. But Nikki Minaj certainly knows what Megan's Law is and took it as a complete attack on her brother and as well as her husband, because Megan's law is... I got the breakdown here.

Megan's Law is the name for a federal law and informal name for a subsequent... Well, I was just about to read the same. The same thing where you had it on hand. Do you want to do it, Jackie? No, go ahead. Okay. In the United States, requiring law enforcement authorities

to make information available to the public regarding registered sex offenders. Laws were created in response to the murder of Megan Kenka, so that's the Megan's Law part of it. But anyways, it's literally just requiring sex offenders to, you know, yeah, I guess it's kind of why there's the whole having to introduce yourself to everybody in your neighborhood and all that kind of stuff.

You know what I mean? And also there is like a valuable and interesting conversation about how the sex offender industry is like really not helpful, but that's not part of what's happening here. So we can just table that. We could just table that. That's a different conversation. That's a different conversation. That's a whole thing.

Totally. I just want to put that out there. but her, Nikki's husband is a registered sex offender. So, so this, so that is why it appeared to be a dig. Yeah. Because he pled guilty in 1995 to the attempted rape of a 16 year old girl, all right? And that's just the, that's just them facts, bro.

So you know what I'm saying? So that's why I'm like scared of the barbs. But at the same time, there's this very uncomfortable truth about Nikki Minaj and her family. And there's also, it's also her brother as well has. some, is it allegations or previous, that's the only one I don't know the specifics on. But her brother also has stuff. And so it's just a awkward,

it's a tough subject to crack a pounced. But at the same time, you have this very fierce fan base. So it's just this weird, like Chinese finger trap of a scenario when it comes to. But also, Nikki, like, is, you know, likes drama, I think. So, like, his track came out.

And then since then, Nikki has had, like, many tweets and Instagram live, like, her own track that came out. Like, and so it seems there seems to be- Called that on Monday, yeah. Which is a dig at Megan, because Megan got shot in the foot. And, like. Yeah, you mean like the line, bad bitch, she likes six foot. I call her big foot. The bitch fell off. I said, get up on your good foot because she got shot in the foot.

And they had beef about this. I'm sorry, just had to throw it out there. Keep going, MJ. And this had, this did not all just start. They had been having beef about this and like, and specifically about the incident of Megan getting shot. It's just really coming to a head. Right, exactly.

So it's coming to a head now. So Megan, like, went on breakfast club and talked about it. But, but Nikki, it's just, it's one of those things when you're mad online and you're just having, and you're just tweeting through it. And you're saying, I'm not mad. I'm not mad. But you're, you're mad. you know, so Nikki's obviously very upset and has had a lot of tweets in response. And so this has been like, if you are still on Twitter, which there's really no reason to be there anymore in my opinion, but I'm still there. And it was like the only, it was the singular story of the weekend was this beef. And I, like I said, I felt very inadequate to, uh, to follow it. Because yes, I love me a super base. I used to be a big kind of casual fan of Nikki Minaj, but I know over the years her politics and her choice.

and her like the way she speaks about things publicly has just kind of taken a bit of a turn. And Megan Estalian seems great. And this beef seems like, yeah, it was one of these things where I was like, okay, I am going to try to learn about this, but I also don't feel equipped to weigh in on it. Yeah, also chew down with the big foot thing, Megan was shot in the foot. So that's like a big part of it. And the other thing I was going to say was just like the best part. the best thing going on with it in a way is the fact the vaguer of the stallion just has not responded at all to any of this like tantruming happening you know so she's playing it fairly

cool even when she was on breakfast club she didn't really name any names she was just like people are mad but i'm gonna fight she said a hit dog will holler she's like i'm basically going to stand up for myself and defend myself but yeah but then over the weekend nicky minage did do like an Instagram live and she was like put like she kept posting like like furiously posting lyrics from the the track that she dropped on Monday Bigfoot and also even brought up she accused Megan the stallion of lying about everything except her birth date but she also mentioned Megan's mother Holly Thomas who died from cancer in 2019 so she's bringing she's like just attacking in every way.

Yeah. And it really does seem like I'm trying to find like crazy things that Megan the Stallion is saying in retaliation. And I'm really not finding it. And this might change over the week

but I don't know. And it just makes me like Megan the Stallion more. Yeah, I'm telling you, I again, love you Barbes, love you guys. Nick and Minaj and the fan and her super fans are

a bit, it's of a bit. It's so funny how now, like, I never used to look at fandoms like this growing up, right? Where it was like, it wasn't like it was like the new kids on the block fans versus the Backstreet Boys fans, you know what I mean? Or something like that. Or even Madonna fans versus Britney Spears fans, you know? It didn't really feel like that.

Now everybody has an army. Everybody's got their army of people who like are faceless and exist on social media and we give them names. and they fight for their pop idol like it's their fearless leader. And they're in the United States of Nikki Minaj or of Taylor Swift or whoever it may be. It's just, you know, and that's why it was very interesting of what Doja Cat was doing, where she like was, it felt like such a move to be like, fuck my super fans. You're not, you're not like my buddies. you know what I mean, or whatever it is.

Or you're not like, I don't, I don't like lead you. You know what I mean? There's no allegiance here. I've just, whatever. And some could see that as like being disrespectful because she said a lot more than what I just said. And it could easily be taken as disrespectful to the fan base. But at the same time, in a way, I commend it because it's like,

this is so much scarier when like you have someone who's a huge deal who has a massive following. and they have no issue with going, hey, attack this person. I want you to attack this person. This is a great example of it. Literally what happened yesterday. Confused Nikki Minaj fans send Ruby Rose death threats in Megan the stallion beef because they accidentally confused there is a rapper Ruby RUBI Rose who threw shots

at Minaj on Sunday. Ruby Rose, the actor, that has nothing to do with this. And so now they are being inundated with death threats, even though they had nothing to do with it. So this is why, like, I am, like, there's a reason why we don't talk about these things. There is also a piece of this that is, I think, some important context in terms of, like, to shed a little bit of light on how Nikki is acting, which was that she also congratulated Ben Shapiro on his disc track. and, or whatever the fuck it was. Yeah, wait, wait, I forgot if it'd been, I've already been told we're going to be hearing this on Jack and with the Holdies this Friday, this Ben Shapiro rap track, I guess.

Yeah, Ben Shapiro did a, did a thing. And then Nicky said, congrats to him. Yes. And like, so a lot of people were like talking about how disappointing that was because, like, so much of Nikki's fan base is queer people. And obviously Ben Shapiro is, a massive homophobic and transphobe. And so that was, I mean, just to align yourself ever with Ben Shapiro is just a strange

choice. And so there's just a lot of strange choices happening over there. Well, MJ, I think it's a fine choice. I love Nikki Minaj and I love Barb's. And I just want you guys to know that, you know what I mean? And everything I said, they forced me to say that anything I said negative, they made me say it. Yeah.

This is what I'm saying. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, no. I just, I get scared. Tox me and my family. I have a little girl.

They doxed an autistic influencer just for saying that they liked Megan the Stallion's video. Everyone's going to know where your little girl poops and peas on the floor holding. Oh my God, how dare you? I'm potty trading right now. I'm covered. I'm knee deep and piss and shit right now. Man, I just grounded myself hard. Back to reality.

Just piss and shit for all that big deal. Real reality. But anyways, she has little hands. She has little hands. So anyways, just don't even worry about it, Barbes. Love you, Barbes. All right. Don't insult anyone's hands.

Oh, your child has little hands. I thought you were talking about. We don't need, what are you talking about? I think our hands are fine. My response to Bigfoot is little hands. My response to Bigfoot is little hands. That's the whole thing. It's not my response.

I'm like, oh, yeah. Well, she's got a big foot, but you got little hands. cute little hands, cute little hands. Oh, no, that's when you bring in jewel, and you have jewel at your side. It has a small one. And then Nikki Minaj,

decks her in the face. I think. I'm saying that she would do it. I would pay for that, though, dog. That's a show I'd sign up to watch. Dude, I'm in between my evil reality shows right now. Everything's too wholesome. It's all queer eye and love and the spectrum for me,

because trust is over and it's killing me. And that's why I, you know what, I genuinely was upset. I want to say thank you to everybody that sent in the video of Tyra Banks being kind of attacked by two people in furry costumes at the NBA games. Yeah, this was also page seven base for sure. This was page seven bait, except for the fact that I am sad that it was all planned. I got genuinely sad that I was like, I thought that this was just something that was happening to her.

And of course, Jackie, come on. Of course it's all planned. But can't a woman dream that she was just trapped in this situation and didn't know how to get out of it? As someone that read and took time to read a loud model land. And I do feel that I can speak after having lived inside of Tyra Banks' brain for a moment in time. I'm really sad that this wasn't a real video. Yeah, I know. We talk a lot about how we don't like pranks here at page seven.

This is why we started April Reels Day. And I just feel like... Don't even bring it up. It's coming up and I've got nothing to say. I've got nothing to fucking say to either one of you. We've got time. We've got, we've got a few months. Maybe it's not a holiday we need to celebrate every year.

Maybe we can just skip it this year. I cannot believe these, my two co-hosts are trying to squirm like a little more. It's a leap year. Maybe we don't do it this year. It's a leap year. Are you kidding me? Now I'm bringing real tough truths. Oh, yeah, mama.

I'm bringing them big truth. Maybe we replace. it with like a different page seven challenge. Like we can like figure out what food we're going to eat in the shower like Jessica Beal or something. We could just do something else page 70. It's got to be painful. It's got to be like putting we have to electric shock our genitals or something. Something as painful is telling the truth. We have to eat the hottest hot sauce we can find while getting our genitals electrochalked. It's either that. My chest. For reals you pick. I've got bad acid.

Yeah, Jackie's acid could never handle hot ones. It'll be a problem. It'll be a problem. I just don't like the PR. Our prank. It's a prank and everybody thinks it's fun. What's it even an ad for? What's it even an ad for? Yeah. What is... We don't know yet. We don't know. We just know that it's the same company.

Whoever set it up. Yes. It is the same company that did, which I also included the, I think the comedy set that, set the world to flame, I guess, just because of this viral video of a person getting escorted out of Mark Norman, a friend of ours, a comedian. friend of ours. Mark Norman was doing a set and someone was escorted out and like obviously like being run out of the theater. And so Mark Norman had no idea what was going on and eventually everyone was evacuated from the building. And it was it seemed like it was a very upsetting situation. Yeah. But turns out it wasn't. It was all a PR thing. It was a PR thing. And it's the same company that did the Tyra Banks thing as well. And we still don't know what the first.

fuck it's an ad for, this shit is gonna make me insane. Like the AI deep fake stuff is really, really bad and really, really scary. And also, I'm sorry, but the idea of just, like, creating a mass panic public event in a theater at a time when we live in a fucking country that is, like, riddled with mass shootings and, like, other public, like, terror. It is so weird to be like, it was a bet. You were scared. You had to leave the theater.

I don't think that's funny at all. I think that's very upsetting. Couple things. couple things. First of all, Little Bird told me it's for some new Donald Glover TV show. I don't know how true that is, but whatever, Little Bird told me that. Second of all, apparently, Mark Norman had no idea. It was that what that was going to happen. And if you know, Mark, I mean, his whole thing is he's incredibly, like, socially awkward. He has a lot of, like, issue, like a lot of anxiety around social stuff. And so it just feels especially mean to do it to him.

Yeah. Of all people. And then, um, the third thing is, the club did know about it. And the next day was like, if anybody in the audience was to contact us and come to a free show, let us know. It's like, fuck off. Are you kidding?

No, I would never know about it. Like, what? You get another, sorry, your show had to be evacuated in a scary way. They made everybody leave. No. This girl gets on stage, like, this girl, or this lady gets on stage

who's all, and I'm sure, she was in on the act, obviously, but she, like, did nothing in the moment that would give anybody a sense of, like, everything's maybe okay. She got up on stage and was like, everything's fine. Everyone needs to leave. Everyone's got, and she was, like, playing it up in this really scary way. And then he was getting, like, tased out front of the, like, just outside the doors as they, like,

dragged him the guy out. It was felt so unsafe and weird. And I'm not trying to be, like, so delicate. It just sucks. It just is one of those things. Also, it was like, they, paid money. They went out to the comedy club that night. Who knows how much effort went into that?

Because some people have to get fucking babysitters and shit. And you're going to like fuck their night up for some dumb, I hate these pranky public. I like some guerrilla marketing school. But when it's this kind of shit, I don't care about the tire of shit. Whatever. Yeah, the tire shit's cute and fun. And yeah. Don't do.

And also, if you're going to do it, I need to be really clever and smart what you're doing. And that's what I hate so much about, like, YouTube prank videos. I find them to be incredibly lazy and hacky. And you know what I mean? Right. Just incredibly, like, boring and, like, eye-roly, right? And so I just don't, it pisses me off how little effort gets put into these really, like, for actual people in the world are really scary situations. You know what I mean?

Yeah. It's like, I just, it pisses me off. Like, there's just so much horrible things. going on. Like, do we need this right now? Is this what we fucking need? If we didn't live in a country where we were unfortunately, like, frequently not safe in public.

Right. Like, because of like the, again, we just live in a country of constant mass shooting. So the idea of evoking, like, everybody needs to leave. Scary. It's weird. Like, that's just not a fun. Yeah, it's just not a fun thing. And I know we have to move on, but I, we get, oh, I guess we have to wait to

talk about Jessica Beal eating in the shower. I feel like we really have to wait. We have a lot to talk about. this week. I didn't even realize how much we had to get through this week. Eating in the shower? Check us out on the leftovers. I love a shower beer. Patreon.com forward slash page seven podcast.

We're going to be talking about so much more than what we were able to talk about in today's episode. So get on that $5 layer if you want to hear some more of the juicy bits. But also if you want the $10 layer, which is what we are, we just released the second episode of Buffy. We are now getting fully. We are getting seduced by Giles. And we have found out that Giles is not a cruise.

creepest, even though I have asked multiple times and made sure Giles is not going to end up being a creepest. Apparently, he's just a daddy. Come join us for the ride over on patreon.com forward slash page seven podcast. I can't wait to meet Miss Calendar. Anyways, hit me with the share. Do you believe it? These personal celeb anecdotes from listeners, that's right.

It's a grab bag mail episode. I got too very fun. It was like neither were enough to do a fool, but they're fun together in this little two-two punch. You got two do you believes today. Is the Taylor's a si-op? Because we know that's true. We already covered that. I've got plenty of those. We've definitely got plenty of those as well in the

conspiracies. But no, this one is about old Timothy Chlamydia. This one comes in from Liz's subject line. Timothy Chlamydia confirmed I would know. And Liz writes, hey gang, I'm catching up on page 7 from the holidays, but I'm writing in for the first time to say, Timothy,

100% spread chlamydia around NYU. I personally knows someone who contracted chlamydia from him while a student in NYU around 2016. Yes, getting to the bottom of it. It's a historical fact, and he was very well known for his sexual escapades. Wish I had more details about his actual fuck abilities, but sadly I don't. Love you guys.

Love page 7. Love a fellow monster fucker. Oh, yeah. I love this. Now, is there monster fucking in Crescent City? Do monsters get their dicks? No, well, it depends on if you see, like, the malachim, which are angels, if you see them as a monster.

As monsters. Like, it really depends on how you feel about, because there is fucking angels. I'm not a, I'm not a monster. I'm an angel. Now, please, watch the cum dribble out. All right, anyways. Honestly, sometimes we do read about the cum dribbling out. All right.

Sometimes you add a little dribble. That's what you're going to do. Play a basketball down there these days. I don't know what's going on. But anyways, this one comes in with the subject line. Gaylor support Carly Claus Anacotal Evidence Question Mark They write

Hi my favorite people I went to the same schools Growing up as Carly Claus As she was in my siblings grade A few years older than me We know her family pretty well And I was in classes with her younger twin sisters My entire K through 12

Her family got a lot of bad press For having such a famous family member My sister told me they dealt with death threats And all kinds of things sent to their old address So they stay pretty quiet now What is wrong with people? The very death threat heavy episode this week. Carly herself became a massive success once someone discovered her when she was way too young,

like at age 12 in a mall, and began her modeling career. We'd see her on billboards, and it was very much a, I know her type of thing for people from St. Louis. This was the era of America's next top model. So it was really cool to have someone we knew doing that. I hope that 12-year-old was thin enough. Carly was very much the it girl. But despite that, she was always the opposite of conceited. She always was really sweet and sanely smart with great grades,

talented in many ways and was super tall and super striking. Wow. She would come back to the high school. Did Taylor write this? I think Taylor Swift wrote this. She would come back to the high school after she was done traveling. Shape of her body is blue. It was sort of rare to cheat her.

Obviously she's gay. One time after a high school play, I passed her while walking. and she gave me this dazzling smile and my inner closeted gay nearly had a stroke. I don't know any more personal details about Taylor, but just based on my knowledge of Carly throughout the years, I'm 100% behind Gaylor. She's just one of those people who's got it all

while still being a good person. And she and Taylor have known each other for so long. Anyways, just wanted to add my two cents as a sapphic. I can dig it, and it's my favorite conspiracy. Best of y'all. Thank you so much, Aon. Thank you for that information. This was great.

Like, I feel like, I don't, I don't know if I ever had an opinion on Carly Klaus, but, uh, or Kari Klaus, I, I guess I like her now.

I think the assumption with that sort of model type is that they wouldn't be all the things that this person described. You know what I mean? It makes me so happy. I love hearing positive things about people and, and I love, like, oh, that's such a wonderful.

Thank you for writing this name. They stayed, you know, they got hugely famous very young, but they kept it real and they were like a good student and yada, yada yada. That usually don't hear all of that. Yeah. For sure. But also I think this person's just very gay for Carly Claw. I get it. I get it. You know, when I had the crush on, you know, Jennifer in middle school, she could do no wrong. She was so talented and she was beautiful. And she

was, she was, to me, she was famous, like in the school, but she like kept it so real. You know what I mean? Like, it was crazy. I feel the same way about Aragorn. Like, I look at him and I'm just like, I'll never be enough for you. Yeah, you're like a king and you're my everything. You're like a king or whatever and you keep it so real. You like wear dirty boots. Like he didn't even want to be the king but then like he has to be. He's like he has to be.

He's just like his destiny and like he maybe he wants to kiss me. He believes in duty and he understands the duty of a man's sexual favors towards his wife. And that's important. You talk about the duties that are all over your floors right now? Deep and just I feel like I'm living in Army Hammer's father's chair. Don't drink up Army Hammer's. Don't. Don't.

You're not. Is that how you look at the potty? Do you look at the potty now? Yeah. Oh, God. Teach her to call the potty Army Hammer's dad's chair. It's long. She'll get it eventually.

She'll figure it out. Probably not. Honestly, ever she'd never. figures that out. But regardless, that's my, that's my celebrity conspiracy of the week. I love that. Honestly, I love, I feel like there's two twin desires that live in each of us. One is to, like, hate people who were popular and beautiful because I feel like a lot of like the, especially in the 90s, but maybe still now, like the media we consumed was like, aren't those people awful? And we hate them. They're so beautiful and cool. Don't you wish you were them? And so we hate them. But I feel like

there's another twin, which is like, if they're nice, they can be beautiful and cool and popular, and it doesn't mean they're a bad person. They might be a good person. And I love the idea that Carly Claus was like radiant and popular, but like also just great. There are some people like that who are perfect, but you don't hate them for it. You love them for. Yeah. I just love them. Agreed. Like Mariah Carey, you know, it's why. I would, I wouldn't name Mariah Carey first in that example, but, whoa. Well, I guess I'm going to take my shock and upset, and I guess I'm going to take it to the list. Oh!

Who's on the list? Check A, got to have that list. Moment celebrities should be deeply embarrassed about. These go, it's all across the board. Things like which, I mean, we understand this, suffering from postpartum depression. Tom Cruise says you need vitamins and exercise. And you should never take antidepressants.

Thanks, Tom Cruise. Thanks, Scientology. And that is just fun. What about the time Averalivis? Bean's best advice for getting the man of your dreams is to just wait for him to take the initiative. She says, men like a chase. It's good too when you can be yourself and no one's trying too hard.

This is what we had to contend with. The millennials grew up with this type of advice and I'm just so glad that I think it's not quite like that anymore where it's like, no, no, no, you have to wait for him to do it. Yeah. You can't do anything. I love this list. This is great. I love for letting your mouth shit.

I think I was always scared. I was always the aggressor anyway, so I never listened to it. But then I always felt like I'm not one of the usual girls. You know what I mean? I'm just like such a Bella. Singer-songwriter Candy Burris suggested licking your finger, coating it in sugar, and sticking it up your vagina to make it more sticky so that it, quote, feels like it's grabbing him more.

Yikes. What? And wouldn't it hurt the dick, I think? And the pussy. Don't put sugar in your blood. I mean, and it's so unhoused. It's so, you just talked about yeast infections and stuff.

Don't do that. Make it feel like it's grabbing him. Grabbing him more. I don't need to feel like anything's grabbing me. I'm going to put my snail mucin up there. At least it would hydrate at the same time. Yeah, there's so much better stickier stuff too than sugar. Yeah, you should put a bunch of fly traps up there.

Yeah, I'm sucking. Like the sticky tape. Just cover it in sticky tape. Fly tape. Fly tape. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yikes. Well, Tiffany Haddish claims that the government doesn't want you to know about the health benefits of drinking turpentine, especially as a cure for the common cold, and that a teaspoon of turpentine, quote, won't kill you. But scientists say that it totally can. Keep it moving, Tiffany Haddish.

There's just, it's certain things like that where it makes me think of Mother God. Did you guys, yeah, the mother god, which was drinking the, uh, I always forget the name of it, the blue something, or no, no, the silver. Yes, colloidal silver. Colytal silver. Yeah, but it turns you blue. That's why it's complicated. It's a colloidal silver, but it turns your skin blue.

Turns, it turns you blue. What about Miranda Kerr that loves leach facials? They work this way. Leaches suck blood from your face and then you smear the blood around. I think that leach facials don't make any sense. a top dermatologist has said. But sometimes you gotta smear it around. Now, this is just good motherly advice.

Martha Stewart told her daughter that if your husband is rich but ugly, you shouldn't have his kid. Stewart said you should have a hot guy's kid and raise it as your husband. Wow. That is something that a boomer mom would say. Like, can't you just imagine like, you know, your mom sitting it out and be like,

I'm going to give you some advice and you're just like, what? Yeah. I think it's, I think it makes it more fun that way. way, though. Yeah. Now, other things you shouldn't be eating probably. Shailene Woodley recommended eating clay as a means of cleaning out heavy metal toxins in your body.

Shailene Woodley, I like you a lot. Why are you talking about the toxins? Everybody needs to relax about the toxins. Says clay is great for you because your body doesn't absorb it and apparently provides a negative charge. Apparently. So it bonds to negative isotopes. Absolutely.

I haven't heard a lot of toxins talking a little bit. That's been kind of nice. I've been free of toxin, chat. Everything was toxins for a while. So many times. Your liver is the detoxifier, people. Well, what's so funny is you want, and you want, like, gut bacteria and all this kind of stuff.

It's like an ecosystem in there. You don't want to, like, clean. Same with the pussy. Also an ecosystem. Yeah, you want that per pussy dirty, man. You want to be shoving mud up in there. It's a self-cleaning system. It's a self-cleaning oven.

Exactly. You don't need to be... Shut the door and hope for the best. And actually, there are some detox teas on this list like Kylie Jenner and Demi Lovato's. And they were promoting detox teas, even though lots of people have said that this is not the way to go about it. dangers include electrolyte and mineral imbalances, severe dehydration, internal organ damage, and laxative dependence. It's no good. It's not good for you.

Yeah. And stop drinking all your turpentine. What is just crazy? I mean, just, you know, celebrities, you know what I mean? They're just the same as us. They're just like us. They're just like us. Love you barbs.

Love barbs. I'm so scared. Whoa. We'll just edit in a totally different person's celebrity and fan base's name. We're just like, I don't know. I just feel like what Ariana Grande has been doing lately is just all those arianators. Yeah, the Arna Nators haven't come after us. We're not on any lists about that as far as I know.

No, they seem okay. They just love her no matter what she does, but, you know, she's not, she's not leading attacks on anyone these days. Whoa, I didn't know this. Until SpongeBob breaks her heart. They're just going to lead an attack on the fucking bottom of the ocean, but we'll get there later. Well, did you know that Megan Fox was fired from Transformers Dark of the Moon for a Hitler remark? Yes. In an interview in 2009, Fox said of director Michael Bay, he wants to be like Hitler on his sets, and he is.

Transformer series producer Steven Spielberg immediately got on the phone to be. and told her him to fire her right now. What a dumb. I just don't know why you would. It's so foolish to me. You gain nothing from making that kind of remark and you lose, you stand to lose everything. I've just never understood the risk reward to making statements about like your boss like that in like a big interview, you know? And that's not, it's like, also on this list is Lars von Trier saying, I understand Hitler.

I sympathize with him. Like that is obviously something that should very much get you canceled. I'm not saying that she shouldn't have been, like, gotten in trouble for that. But also it's just like, don't use that as a metaphor to be like you're a bad boss like Hitler. Like, you're not even saying like I like Hitler. But you're just, it's like, don't do this. Don't you understand that this is hurtful. This is not something you should do.

There's like, it feels very irresponsible to compare most people to Hitler. Yeah. It's one of those things you don't invoke. when we do that a lot because it kind of takes the weight away from it in all these ways. It just doesn't, it's no good. And last but not least, in 2003, to oppose illegal downloads of tracks from her American Life album before its release, Madonna leaked a fake version of her songs to pirates with MP3 file recordings of her saying, what the fuck do you think you're doing in the middle of it?

A hacker then hacked Madonna's official website and posted the real version for everyone to download, which I think is even funnier. I think that it's kind of ball or two that she did that. I kind of love that shit, you know? Oh, yeah, I think it's fun. Yeah. But I do think it's funny

that a hacker that hacked didn't put up the regular version anyway. So, yeah. Yeah, yeah. There's so many Hitler sympathizers on this list. There are a lot of Hitler. Also, that's why I was going past some of them.

Yeah, a lot of Hitler. Oh, yeah. Do so much Hitler. Guys, just don't. Just stop. Get a rest. Yeah. Watch the Zone of the Enders or whatever that.

Zone of Hitler. Interest. Oh, my God. So good. Enjoy that and stop feeling akin to. Yeah. All right.

That's my list for you guys. There you go. I can see the list is done, but I can't see anything else. I think I'm going. Blind. Items. Oh, we can't see them.

This, you'll never guess it. This desert festival is rethinking their lineup. You'll never guess that one. And it's not Bonarone. are in talks to have the foreign one, are in talks to have the foreign one named A-Lis singer with that booty everyone lust for to perform. I'm sorry, they want them to perform there?

Yeah, they're in talks to have them perform as a headlined. A one-named booty-licious person. That's right. So what's the festival? Coachella. It's Coachella. And who would the big-assed, fun-budded, One name singer be.

Who would it be? Shakira? Yes. Rumor has it. Her team was trying hard initially to get her on as adliner, but Coachella declined for unknown reasons. And I since read that they've been having their worst ticket sales in like a decade or something like that.

I mean, it makes sense. Literally everyone is sick. I think that every single person, like I would also not really want to be around that many people out in the desert. Oh, like. Okay, I see what you're saying. Like everyone, yeah, you just, it's like, are we in it? We're in like a surge right now.

Is that what's happening? Yeah. Oh, yeah. We're in a surge cola right now. Everybody's gonna, well, that and I mean, the headliners, I guess aren't too bad. Like Fridays, uh, Lada Del Rey, Saturday is Tyler the Creator and Sunday is, uh, Doja Cat, right, for both weekends. Was it last year that it got all crazy rained and flooded? Oh, maybe.

I can't remember if that was last year or two years ago. I'm just trying to think of reason. of why ticket sales are so down. Like, that would definitely give me pause as well. I think if you look at this lineup, it's a bit underwhelming compared to previous years. For how much money it is, too. For how much money it is, how much of a commitment.

And their big reveal is like, and we got no doubt, which is pretty exciting, but I don't know how excited, like, I don't know how excited people who are huge. Lauderdale, Ray, Tyler the Creator, and Doja Cat fans are about no doubt, right? That sounds like more of a... I have surprised that Doja Cat is headlocked.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It's kind of like, and Tyler the Creator, too, I love Tyler the Creator, too. I love Tyler the Creator, but in terms of the, like, biggest headliner you could put up there, I don't know if that's, like, moving the needle as much. I don't know. I hate saying that about Tyler the Creator, though, because I think he's great. It's like 2018 was Beyonce, right, and Homecoming and stuff. And then, like, I feel like, it's like, how can you, what do you do after that, right?

Yeah. Nothing feels close to a Beyonce for this whole festival. And if you look at the whole, you know, rundown, I mean, I'm not really much one to talk because I'm not as keyed into what's really popular these days. But it just doesn't, I don't see anything where I'm like, oh, my God, that I can't believe they got them. You know what I mean? It's like, you know, you got ice spice on there. You've got, I mean, I'd be excited about Sabrina Carpenter. I mean, Chapel Rowan is going to be good idea.

Chappel Roan's hitting a lot of the festivals this summer. And I'm really excited for her. Talk about Sciop. So I will say, and very proud of it. that she gets people to sign up to vote in the like before her shows. Oh yes, that's awesome. Did we talk about how you guys are in a chapel road promo video? Yes.

Oh, wait, we haven't talked about the show. I don't know what we ever talked about it. That was so cool. I knew as soon as Jackie started talking, I knew we were going to be in something because she just turned on that Jackie charm so well. I was too stuck. Why do you say it with such malice? I said.

She turned on that. She turned on that Jackie charm. I think because I was just my next, I was reacting to my next sentence in tone, which was I was too high to talk. What's great is that I don't think anyone else could tell, but just me knowing you, when I saw the video, I was like, Holden is blazed. And he's like, I'm going to let Jackie talk. And Jackie's like, yes, bitch. We love you, bitch. I'm not in a crazy costume, but I'm in like a, I'm dressed in a thing.

And there's a camera. And we had to like sign releases and yada, yada. Plus, I was like, wait, are we supposed to be inside? And then we did get inside just in time for the sound check after that. But, yeah, Jackie killed it. And I was like, oh, we're totally getting in something. There's no way because that was like perfect. I couldn't believe we were on the promo video.

It made me feel like a superstar. I was like, Chapo Rowan has seen my face. Yeah. And that is, I am 36 years old. It is sad to feel this way. But I'm just excited. And Chapo Rowan probably didn't see my face. I'm sure she is a team of people that does it for her.

But what if she saw my face? I think she did because she, I mean, I feel like, well, she probably does have a full-on social media person, but I don't know. She might have seen that video. She probably saw the video at least, the cut of the video. Maybe. She probably saw us to approve stuff, probably. But anyways, in conclusion, it seems like maybe they're in talks with Shakira because

they're scrambling because they need like some more beef on that lineup. I mean, none of the passes are so. out yet. But like again, if you're going to pay, it starts at $500. Jesus. So if you're going to start at $500, like, you better be bringing that, bring it. For three days? Can you get a day pass though? Is it still $500 for just one day? That's way, that's completely, uh, think so. That's crazy. Anyways. Well, general admission passes start at 600. Jesus Christ. No. Absolutely not.

Yeah. No. Anyways. All right. Uh, up next. this A-list singer wants to wait until the end of his tour to announce his long-awaited split with his wife. Justin Timberlake. Yes, Justin Timberlake, Jessica Beal. Which we didn't even talk about the J.T. Britt's stuff. We're going to talk about it on the leftovers. That's why she's eating in the shower. She's sad eating.

Yeah. Timberlake recently released the song, Selvish. We'll talk more about the other part of that story in the leftovers. But I will just say, Selfish has lyrics such as, your lips were made for mine. my heart would go flatline if I wasn't beating for you all the time. I want every bit of you. I guess I'm selfish. It's bad for my mental, but I can't fight it when you're out looking like you do.

But you can't hide it. Can't hide it. You just start saying it's bad for my mental. It's bad for my mental. That's bad for my mental. What was selfish, JT, was you holding hands with someone else while you're out. If you're going to cheat, do it, Mine closed doors.

Yeah. Cry me a river, J.T. Yeah. Cry me a river. I don't trust. All right. Last one. While doing press for their very successful movie,

this illiterate actress and her co-star have only been using one room. Apparently the fake relationship is now real. Sidney Sweeney. Sidney Sweeney, Glenn Powell, anyone, but you just recently surpassed the $100 million mark in the box office. I kind of wanted to go see it. And I was like, I tried to get Jeff to go see it with me. And I was like, come on, Sidney Sweden is in it.

She's got, she's got, he's like, it's not enough for me to watch that movie. You're like, she's got big honkers. Yeah. He's like, yeah, he's like, I'm not 17. Well, that's literally, he was like, Jackie, she's like 13 years old. And I was like, she's not. She's not. She's old enough.

I think it was only back when I was the horniest peak horny of being a, like, teenager into early 20-year-old. that's how horny you had to be to go see a movie just to see a woman in it that's not even necessarily getting naked. He's like, I've got a great piece of ass at home. I don't need to go to the movie theater to stare at one on a screen. Definitely thought he was going to say free pornography of my phone. But that too, he also has a delicious wonderful piece of ass in hell.

He loves me, damn it. Though they have denied any funny business, Glenn Powell did break up with his girlfriend of over three years during the making and promotion of this film. experience. Who's the SpongeBob now, dog? Whoa. All right. Also, I want to say thank you to whoever wrote in that told us to look up Frankie Grande. Yes. Apparently Frankie Grande and Ethan Slater, aka SpongeBob, look very similar to each other. Yes. And which is, that's Ariana's brother, by the way. Really? Yeah. Yeah, they look

similar. It's a whole thing. How does anybody look similar to Ethan Slater? He looks like a very unique man. Yeah. You'd think that. All right. I'm looking up Frankie Grande. I'm freaking out. It looks like a very unique person as well. Wow. Yeah, right? Right? Wow.

I know it's surprising. I am surprised. I don't know what I was expecting, but he does look. You expected a lie, but you found a truth. Wow. There you go. Lexi looks like Avery, so I get it. That is not true.

Well, all right. I could see again. You guys passed my evil test, and we are here at the end of the episode of page seven. Thank you for your evil test, Holden. You're welcome. Thank you everybody else also for joining us. And if you want to give us evil tests, not to the barbs, but if there are other evil tests you want to give us, I'm sure that we will take them.

My name is Jackie Zabrowski. Thanks, guys. Oh, my God. I feel like I just have so much thirst in my life right now between Lord of the Rings and Crescent City that, like, I don't know what to do with myself. But I just want to thank you for being here with me in my time of need when I'm talking to but I'm also thinking about Hunt Athelar and what's going on with him in my mind space.

So please come hang out over on our Patreon. You can follow me on Instagram first at Jack That Worm. And then also come hang out on our Patreon, patreon.com slash page seven podcast. Because we've got Buffy every week. We are in the middle of a soul to keep. Also shout out to the ancient magus. I don't know how to say magus.

M-A-G-U-S, which apparently is the, is the... I think it's an am I, if I remember correctly, that a soul to keep is possibly based on. So I'm going to look into that further and thank you for letting me know. Hell yeah. Check me out on Twitch.combe forward slash holdenators ho.

Ho? He, please check me out. Jagging with the holdies every Friday. It's just getting bigger and bigger. I feel like every week we're growing our little army, okay? But we will alliance with the barbs because we again are afraid of you.

Who's going to be the first person you docks? Oh, I want to dox. Chelsea Clinton. We're getting hurt. I'm going to for you, Chelsea Barbie. Got a few chels. Hashtag Hillary Barbie. Probably not her first time, unfortunately.

Probably not. Hashtag Chelsea Ken. How about that? Whoa. Hashtack Chelsea Kent. Yo, and again, I just want to emphasize page seven podcast on Patreon, Patreon.com, for it slash page seven podcast. Just to reiterate, add free episodes,

bonus episodes every week. Jackie does the book club, bonus readings every week, all that for $5. And for just $10, you can enjoy our video, full feed, video watchalong of the amazing so far already just with two episodes in, Buffy, the Vampire Slayer with me, Jackie, and MJ. And A, by the way, our Jersey Shore watchalong slot, people are going on Discord at that same slot on Thursdays. at 5 p.m. PT and still are what now watching our watch along together. So join that. Oh, that's so fun. Guys. I'm so glad to hear that. Yeah. If you want to watch it with us watch Buffy with a crew of people, that still seems to be an operation at this point. So go go get over there on that too. So there's lots of reasons to watch and ways to get there for it.

And I think that's it. M.J. My name is M.J. And I'm M.J. K. L. Kat on Instagram. All right. Let's sing the song. Shout. Shout. Let it all out. These are the emails that you wrote it about.

Come on. We're going to read it to you. Come on. Oh, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for sending in your shoutouts to page 7 podcast at gmail.com. Again, you can send in your own shoutouts to page 7 podcast at gmail.com. Oh, we love you. hearing from you guys and I always appreciate it. I also want to just give a quick shout out to

Leah who sent in a recommendation for me to start watching Loudermilk. And I did watch the first season and I kind of like completely forgot about it and thank you for recommending it and I'll have to jump back into it. So I appreciate you. And again, we appreciate all your emails over here at page seven, especially your shoutouts. This shout out goes out to Emily. Emily says, Today I want to shout out my amazing husband. We are huge fans with the podcast, and I always try to wait to listen so we can listen together in the car over the weekend. I want to shout from the rooftops about Danny because we just launched our own podcast,

Yee the Rich. I'm a comedian, and he's not a performer. But he had a great idea for a podcast. We talk about super rich people and all the nice things they claim to do for the world, and then all the garbage stuff they actually do. He thought of the great name, Yeat the Rich, and I was like, well, I'm going to make this podcast with or without you. And he has thrown himself into the project. He gets so excited about researching the topics.

He's working on his delivery and presentation on the show. And he's so happy when people send him a message that they're enjoying the podcast. I just want to celebrate him for stepping up to the plate. He's 100% rising to the occasion and going outside of his comfort zone for something that he's excited about. And I'm so impressed with him. Thanks for all the laughs and inspiration. Oh, sending so much love out to you, Emily, and to you, Danny. And again, check out, look up, Yeet, Y-E-E-E-T, Yeat the Rich.

Look it up, check it out. Send it, put a smile on Danny's face, won't you? Send in a couple emails to them, too. It would be awesome. Thank you guys so much. And thank you, Emily, for sending in your amazing shout-out. I also have a wonderful shout-out. Go, went out to Natalie.

Natalie says, I love you all so much. and I want to thank you so much for helping me through so many hard times. Also, hello, Jackie, from a fellow Leo and Florida Queen. It is, you know, quite the fusion of two very strong things, but, man, it makes very interesting people. Natalie goes on to say, I'm writing in to shout out myself and my husband Ian, who was a huge fan of the last podcast network for many, many years, and he brought me in. I'm shouting on my husband for encouraging me to start my podcast. Oh my God, it's double podcast shoutouts, the bookly podcast.

After a year filled with getting formally diagnosed with general anxiety disorder, having to learn to take medication, and having to leave two jobs, he encouraged me to do something that would bring me joy and teach me how to exercise my creativity and get me out of my comfort zone. He's truly the best and supportive partner I could have ever asked for, and he deserves all the good things in life. I'm now excited about putting myself out there and talk about books that I love. Your podcast has brought me so much joy and I look forward to the shoutouts

every week. No matter how bad things are, I always smile because of the positivity and courage from the shoutouts. Thank you for everything you do. And thank you, Natalie. And again, check out Bookly. I mean, we did quite a bit of book talking today. So please, now you've got another podcast to listen to that talks about books. Bookley, B-O-O-K-L-Y. Check it out. And thanks so much, Natalie, for writing in. And so much love goes out to you, Ian. And last but certainly not least, we've got Dr. Kim. Dr. Kim is written in, and I do want to say up top, there's a trigger warning for pregnancy loss. So I'll give you a minute if you need to stop this. This is the last shout out, though. So I understand if this is not something that you are in the space to handle right now. So shut it off if you need to. Dr. Kim says, after six months of thinking on it, I decided to write a shout out to myself. I found out I was pregnant in July. And even though I was a bit stunned at first, I was ecstatic. At 35, I thought maybe the chance to have children had passed me by.

But there it was, a delightful world-shifting surprise. Despite all my efforts, though, my first ultrasound wasn't positive. The OB threw around the term silent miscarriage, where the baby stops growing, but the body still thinks it's pregnant. I spent the next two weeks waiting to see if my baby would show signs of life. It wouldn't. Then during the waiting period, I spiked several high fever. and started to bleed. I figured the inevitable had finally happened, but I went to the ER out of an

abundance of caution. When I got there, my oxygen levels tanked, my heart rate rose rapidly, and I began running yet another extremely high fever. After 11 hours in the R, I was admitted to the ICU. I spent five days there. Eventually I learned I had multifocal pneumonia across both lungs, oh my God, and I was going into respiratory failure. I spent the next few days on oxygen, unable to move without assistance. As an added insult, once a lot of, my vitals stabilized, I had to undergo a DNC to remove the products of conception left inside my womb. My doctors determined that the pneumonia had ended my pregnancy. Without exaggeration, it was pure hell. It's been six months, and brush with death aside, I'm lucky. I have a wonderful family who dropped

everything to be with me, compassionate co-workers who texted and visited and called, and friends who never stopped checking on me. Physically, I'm recovering, and I'll be fine. But if I'm being honest, the last few months have been some of the most painful of my life. I wouldn't wish a miscarriage on my worst enemy. I feel like I've been inducted into the world's worst club, and there's no getting out once you're in. Anyway, thank each of you, Jackie, I'm Jay and Holden, for being my constant companions and keeping me sane on days when I didn't think I'd ever come back from the grief. You three have kept me together as if you were by my side holding my hands. You and page seven really mean the world to me. And all of my love is sent out

to you, Dr. Kim. I hope you feel my arms around you as I hug you through your ears. And I'm so sorry that you went through this, but I'm so proud of you for seeing it with the perspective that you are gaining every second of every day. And I'm so, I don't know what to say. I'm sending you all my love. I love you guys so much and I appreciate you sending in even when the stories are difficult because, you know, we all go through difficult things and it's hard to get through them sometimes and it's good to get it out. It's good to share. It's good to.

And right now, Dr. Kim, you are inspiring other people just as you type this. So thank you for sending in your shout out. I really appreciate it. And sending all of my love to everybody out there, thank you always for listening every week. And I always, always appreciate you. And I thank you. for listening every single week. M-Wa. Have a good week

and enjoy Crescent City 3 if you're reading. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors, you can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.