Page 7 - Ep. 531: We Can All Be Fun Lesbians Together

Episode Date: April 11, 2024

This week MJ, Jackie and Holden dawn their best bootleg KISS makeup to start their bad girl era as JoJo Siwa tries to reinvent herself much to all our chagrin (and delight), Mormons apparently love Taylor Swift (who just dropped a massive amount of playlists on Apple Music with some iiiiinteresting choices), April Real's day can't happen because they're STRAIGHT OUTTA REALS and no one is willing to step-up to the mantel, but FEAR NOT as Jackin' on that fated Friday, April 19th shall instead feature MJ and a listen of Tay's new album The Tortured Poets Department THAT DROPS THAT DAY! Join us over on https://www.twitch.tv/holdenatorsho , Shakira and her sons felt emasculated by Barbie and we should all care apparently, Kirsten Dunst and Jesse Plemons don't give their loinspawn phones at the restaurants and MJ says they're BETTER PARENTS THAN THEM, and in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner: Did Miley Steal the Idea for Flowers from Bruno Mars?!?! A list of SHOCKINGLY bizarre "celebrity" facts, da blind items and so much mooooore! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast  Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

I should have known better If I had a wish I wouldn't Never effed around Can't say fuck, that'd be bad Karma's a bitch And I should have known better Jackie stop me Oh you want to stop

I thought you wanted to keep going Holden is singing Oh ring ring ring Oh what are those beautiful bells That we hear coming from Holden No it's just Karma by Jojo Siwa Welcome to Page 7 And whoa we've got things to

say this will be the third time we've talked about Jojo Siwa this morning because we lost some audio. We lost some, it's, it's been a, it's been a minute since this sort of thing's happened. It's, I will take the blame. My recording just got to stop 15 minutes into a, it's not you, it's technology. Karma's not the bitch.

Technology is the bitch. That's the thing. Maybe it's karma. We were talking shit. Oh, should we not talk shit? How would we know? We literally just talked shit on Jojo Siwa for 15 minutes. That she knows.

And then karma do it. Does she know that we're talking shit? The whole, so, okay, we've already started this episode, basically making fun of the Jojo Siwa song, Karma. But here is our disclaimer, okay? We here at page seven, we have compassion for child stars, okay? We don't think that they should be laughed at and pointed at and laughed at again as they transition from childhood to adulthood, which they have to do in public, which none of us would want to do, okay? No. So that is where we're at with Jojo Siwa.

Also, the nation is doing a bit of pointing and laughing at Jojo Seaward right now because she has a new music video, a new look, and a new vibe. Yeah, she's really reinvent. She's trying to reinvent herself. And I am watching this whole thing. And all I can think of is, oh, girl. Oh, I'm so sorry. And, you know, she's making choices.

And, you know, it's got to be really difficult growing up in front of the world and then trying to like become an adult, especially when your whole vibe was pink, sparkles. Like essentially her vibe was like your five-year-old daughter's vibe, MJ. Yes. I think we own several Jojo Siwa branded things. Like, yes. And she, right, so she came from dance moms and then also became her own franchise. chize and if you're if you have children that love pink and sparkles you probably own some jojo siwa like branded things also it's crazy too not only her whole vibe like i don't know if you guys remembered but i met her a couple of years ago and worked with her on this show and she rolls up

with like her like car with her face plastered all over it ever like she like comes in and she like her whole team is all jojowed out and like she like she like riding a unicorn, you know? She may as well be, but she also is just like, it's like exudes this really cool, positive fun energy. Oh, that's nice. Why I feel bad shitting on her. Because like she really is, she's trying and look up. Watch the karma music video. Right. Check it out. So yeah. See what we're saying. Yeah. About her new vibe. If you haven't seen it yet, it is worth taking a look. I mean, you've probably seen the pictures of her doing the Gene Simmons kiss look, which he has said

he thinks she did well. And I think that's very nice of him. I'm not even I always want fashion advice from Gene Simmons. Yeah, I always want Gene Simmons to be like, Jackie, great fit. Thanks, Gene. I think there in lies like our first big misstep, right? I think like conjuring kiss in your bad girl twist turn era is inherently like lame, right? Because Kiss now represents

I know, but I'm sorry, we have to talk about it. It's cringy and I apologize ahead of time for being mean to the 20 year old girl. But also we, you know, we, come on, you ever, the video has like 14 million views. I think a lot of people are at least generally aware

of it. It's a moment, it's weird, it's an internet thing, it's pop culture, it's page seven, right? We have to talk We do have to talk about it. But we also are going to go into this conversation with the knowledge that it is a literal nightmare for child stars on this earth. And that like there's no, I take no pleasure. I've never taken any pleasure in like making fun of Justin Bieber, right? Because like we know why he's weird. We saw it happen. He was a kid. And then he had to grow up in front of all of us. No one would want that. Right. And so I think that there is, I think that there is really important actually things to point. point out about why it's weird what she's doing. And I think we can try to do it here in a way that is

mindful of the fact that she's 20. She's not a child. Yeah. But man, is she a young adult? A young adult. It's just a lot. It's a lot of stuff that's coming out as old, like, as if she were still 11. Right.

Like a couple of weeks ago on her Instagram, she just posted up this video that said, warning. The following content is not made for children and may be disturbing or offensive. to some viewers may contain sexual themes, violence, strong language, traumatic scenarios, and flashing lights. Viewer discretion is advised. And that was about the music video.

There's no violence. And there's not much sexuality. I think she just means, I think either her music video or she just means that, like, her new vibe is this. Yeah. And it's also, it's just like, I understand she needs to alert people that she's trying to change, especially she's got a lot of child followers. So she has to alert people.

I understand this. But the warning, yeah. Girl, it's not like, what, like, what are you doing behind the scenes over here?

Is it just the Jean Simmons makeup or is other stuff about to, like, it's not like you've got gations coming out. I don't think. Well, even the bad girl effort is so pure. It's like,

like, it's, it is like a, and I don't, I keep looking up. I don't think she's actually like a, like, like,

you know, explicitly, conservative or explicitly Christian or anything, but it's like a, it's like a youth group's version of what a bad girl music video would be. You know, it's like if you went to a youth group at church and they were like, your assignment tonight is to make a music video of a rock star. Like, you know, it's like it has that, like there's humping, but it's not even like sexy humping. Like there's kissing, but there's not even really, it's like very platonic kissing. It's just, it's confusingly not bad. It's like, how is this bad girl not bad at all?

That's why going back to the kiss thing is, that's what kisses, right? Kiss like on its face is like, oh, it's crazy. These guys are like evil guys. But really they're like the most Disney-fied version of rock and roll. Like it's not actual. There's no real edge to it. They're nowhere close to anything of like real like actual, you know. I mean, they do sing a song called, I want to rock and roll. Oh. night and party every day. Even like Alice Cooper's like actually just a big old nerd who's into like opera and shit. But also don't get me wrong. I love kiss.

I mean I love kids. But to evoke it as like I've gone bad now. Look at me. And then the other I think the other big fashion misstep for like not coming off bad girl dolls, she still has that pulled back hair thing going on. Albeit she tried to sort of mohawk it or something, but it still just gives baby doll. in this weird way, like cabbage patch kid in this weird way, that just, again, I don't,

and then you'd be like, okay, fine, fashion aside, what is she serving up in this video? Right. With the choreography and everything, the choreography feels so, like, technical and dialed in and not sexy. It's her dance style. No chemistry.

It's dance like a dance, like a children's dance show choreography, right? Like, it's, I was never a dance mom's watcher. Right. But I was a, so you think you can. I was. loved so you think you can dance. And that was, and I loved so you think you can dance junior or whatever the, the kid's version was. And I always laughed when I watched it because I was like, Jackie

hates children singing. I wonder how she feels about children dancing. You know, I watched too much of it. But like, Jojo Siwa has songs like called Every Girl's a Supergirl. There's a song called Kid in a Candy Store. You know, like there's a song called High Top Shoes. So I'm not saying that she can't change. Right. And I'm eager to watch how this evolves, I would assume. Right. Yes.

And I think, right. So the obvious comparison here and one that Jojo herself has made and is being evoked a lot right now in terms of the level of cringe that we are experiencing is Miley. Because Miley also had to go through this very, very difficult transition of being a famous. for kids, young person, kid, and then did not want to be for kids anymore, had to grow up and enter her 20s and rebrand herself.

And we all remember the Robin Thick VMA's performance that was very cringe at the time. A lot of people at the time were like, ew, by Lys Cyrus, and now I think thankfully the record has been adjusted to show it was actually an ew, Robin Thick. But I think that it's a difficult,

it's an apt comparison in some ways, right? I think at the time we needed to have faith in Miley that she just needed to be young and do what young people do, which is like make huge mistakes and then get through it. And she did. And it turns out, you know, she really, a lot of, she was, she was still doing great even at the time. It was just like, it was a hard transition to watch. I think it's a difficult comparison because Miley has always been very talented.

And I'm not, if I'm Jojo Siwa, I don't want to be compared to Miley Cyrus. not because Jojo Siwa is not talented, but Miley Cyrus is like a once in a lifetime talent. And I'm just, it's a rough comparison. I'm trying to figure out because there are, it is like, I'm trying to see if it is actual truth, and I can't find the answer,

is that there's word on the internet that karma, the Jojo Siwa song, is actually a Miley Cyrus, like, reject song. Really? But I can't find if it's actually true or not. I mean, I don't know. Yeah, I saw those rumblings as well.

But the fact, I will say too, though, just the fact that she cites Miley and also, like, Britney's, like, bad girl turn as the big inspiration. Just as, like, so obviously, just she's trying to dial in the bad girl turn. Like, I feel like genuinely Miley was inspired by blunts and, like, I think Riley was a bad girl.

Yeah, I think, like, she genuinely was a bad girl. She was secretly a bad girl. Because even, again, in the video of karma, she's wearing all this. stuff and she's like doing all these things and saying all these you know she's saying the word bitch even though she right after says f around which again i have to heartbug is it just blows me away warning she can say the word fuck when that would have been like the only thing slightly bad girl about the song if she just said fuck instead of f um when honestly the biggest like

not even that like offensive or edgy pop stars say fuck in their songs now it's like completely normal now. Fucking Beyonce and Taylor Swift say it now. You know what I mean? And they're big releases. But the whole time she's like giving off the same bubbly energy. She's not, she's not really like performing even like I'm fucking bad now. You know what I mean? She's sort of smiling and kind of having a fun. You know, she kind of looks like she could be in like a bubble gum happy cotton candy shop. And that's why I I think it's interesting that she compares herself to like Amiley, who was actually a bad girl. And then also Brittany, who was made to be sexy from a very young age. Right.

So her transition into adulthood sexy, unfortunately, she was being forced to be sexy for so long that, like, it really wasn't that difficult to transition into, like, being a sexy adult. because she already was like adultified. Yes, she was dancing sexy. She already had that, unfortunately, too young. Yes, totally. But Joju Siwa didn't have that at all. Right. Yeah, that's so true.

Like the whole, oops, the whole thing about Brittany, which I didn't really get at the time because Brittany was a little bit older than me, and so I saw her as like an older person. But the whole thing about Britney was that she was just like 16 and like singing about in all but singing about fucking, right? And I feel like we just don't And this is like

And so yeah Her aging up was like well we Everybody already sees you as an adult But in that it was the horrible gross time When everybody just talked openly about wanting to fuck underage people And like thank God we've moved on from that Yeah exactly she was just like I'm no longer a sexy baby I'm a sexy woman

And then that turned out to be a difficult transition Because we were like we like people the society It was like we like sexy baby And then she was like knife dancing and then she's knife dancing, everybody. We're like, hell yeah, that's what we're talking. I think everybody was unanimous on that one. But then I think also all of this,

all of this cringe from Jojo Siwa, I think can be completely, like, lovingly forgiven as just an awkward transition that is not necessarily worth commenting on except that, you know, it's a huge story in pop culture right now. But I think that the thing that she is getting as much or more scorn for

is that she said she's inventing, a genre of music called gay pop. She's inventing it everybody. Thanks, Jojo Siwa. We haven't had it before. And yes, she is 20. And I do think that there's like the new new baby gay thing where you're like, I'm the first gay.

And like, I'm sure that I said very cringe things when I was like coming out because you're just like, it's just so exciting. And you're like, ah, and you might feel very important or very whatever. And I'm so happy. It was a big deal for her to come out. You know, she, it was. it was like brave or you know et cetera but I think it was especially with her fan base because it is a that's a scary thing yeah like it that's not necessarily who her fan base was right and unfortunately

there are a good amount of people that are just scared of queer people for some fucking reason so they will stop buying hers like that I do think it was brave of her to like come out and say like I'm gay totally and I and wanting to come out as a queer icon I I'm very happy that's why I think I feel so bad, like all of these things and what society did to her. Yes, totally, totally, totally. But the gay pop thing's so dumb. I mean, literally pop is gay pop. You got to respect your elders.

You got to learn, you know, and you don't know what you don't know. On TikTok of like, I love the way they handled it too. Just like a stare into the camera, like not even a reaction or anything. And everyone was like, yes. And even Tiki and Sarah, I mean, they weren't even the first people I thought about. I mean, come on. And, you know, there's so much, you know, I mean, especially now more than ever, Chapel Rhone, Kim Petrus, you know, there's, it's just like an endless array of, uh, what,

Troy, Stephen, what's, what's his, yeah, Tray Savon, yeah. Troy Savon, even like more kind of, like, less like fully queer identifying people are getting queer up there, like Harry Styles, you know what you mean? It's just, like, not a new territory. And I was saying before we started recording, it reminds me of the Simpsons episode when Lisa shows up and all the football gear and is like, that's right, a woman wants to play the game and it's like

we got a lot, you know, there's like tons of girls on the, on the team or whatever. You know what I mean? It's like a lesbian's here to make your music now. Are you afraid? Right. No. This is so, in fact, that's like what you're doing is so nothing when

a world where slut pop Miami exists. Like, could someone play that album for her so she, for them? There's literally a song called gag on. on it that starts with... On Wizard and the Bruiser, we find all those crazy little moments in geek history that make the things we love into inescapable cultural behemates.

If you love video games, movies, comics, and anime, this is the LPN show for you. But wait, Holden, it's not just educational. Shouldn't we talk about all those crazy boner jokes we make all the time? No, Jake. No, we will not. Fair enough. Last Podcast Network presents Wizard and the Bruiser.

Find it on your favorite podcast app and hit that little subby-dub button. Ooh, we would love it if you did that. Oh, that would help us out so much. God, wouldn't you love to do that? Don't I sound like the kind of person you want to help? Like, hit the button. Like, just do it. But even if we're not talking about compretris,

because I'm not sure if Jojo-Ci will listen to Kim Petrus, but like Elton John, right? Like, Queen. Like, there's just, I just feel like, you know, again, On the one hand, you don't know what you don't know. And she's obviously not coming from a queer community. And so to that point, I would, again, she's 20. If I was hanging out with a 20 year old and they were like,

I have never heard of gay pop music. I would be like, oh, okay, let's find some. You know, like, let's learn. It's not a big deal to like make that gaff, but to be a person who is like a star, like trying to rebrand yourself and then to be like, I'm inventing gay pop. It's just, you just, you could sit down at the computer and just do a little bit of Googling and find out that there have been gay pop stars before you.

And I don't even want to hate her for it because I do think it's an honest mistake. But I think she's getting a lot of shit for it because it's like, it's just like, again, it's a respect your elders. Like, zoom out from your own self a little bit. But 20 year olds famously not good at doing that. Right. It's just the fact that it comes off so calculated and so like artificial. Right.

You know, again, you know, and I liken it to the kid. returning from the summer and going into ninth grade and all of a sudden they went from being like kind of like average looking kid to like now I'm sclore lord you know the crowing man like like all these like crow wings oh my god I would have tried to date that person I would have dated that person in a heart you're fucking you're fucking Lucas we all know your Lucas but how many times were we did everybody listening probably certainly the three of us all had times when we were the Lucas and we were like, I'm new now, respect it. Yes.

I think that's why we resonate with it so much and why at least I personally was like, oh, I want to talk about this shit, ASAP, but we went into the episode and then we had to start over again and we talked about it again because I feel so connected to this in this way of like I'm living through the cringe a little bit, you know, and I'm kind of like, and it makes me think a lot about it's such a hard thing to do to go from like, kid star, you know, to bad kid phase. And it's such a move you have to make. And we saw it actually work in hindsight with Miley.

But there was some awkward steps there, you know. And I think people now can look back on that award show with Robin Thick and be like, oh, that was rough, but she kind of overcame that and recovered from that. And the talent was so clearly there even then, right? Which was, I think, why she was able to float through there. And the taste. I feel like, though, you can look, you know, between Wrecking Ball and we can't stop, and there's actual, like, artistic vision. Like, that song can't stop.

Sounds unique. Is a bop. You know, karma is like, you know, if you would ask me to, like, make up a pop song, it would probably kind of sound like that, you know. Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba. We had to listen to it several times so that we could sing it. to remember what it sounded like. That's why Holden had to sing it up top because I was like, I can't even get it in my head.

I'm just like, karma is... So that's what I happened to this morning. So this morning I woke up, remembered it was page seven. I was like laying in bed trying to wake up and I was like, oh, right, we're going to talk about karma. We're going to talk about Jojo.

And I was trying to remember the song. And then my mind drifted to my league because I was comparing and I couldn't get, can't stop out of my head this morning. I mean, it's such a good song. Oh, it's such a good song. Recking Ball is still one of my favorite songs.

Man, I fucking love that song. And, yeah, I mean, I have videos that I made when I was 20 years old that you could not pay me a million dollars to go back and watch, right? And that's where I think that's where my compassion is coming from. We have all said things. I'll never listen to the round table. I'm never going to listen to it. Maybe someday in my 70s, I'll sit back, I'll get out, you know, the vinyl graph. I don't know what we're going to be listening to at that point.

I feel like we're going to go back in time. And then I'm going to start listening to Roundtable again and be like, I remember when I said. those things. Oh, yeah. Remember when I dated that snake man? I mean, I cringe at things I said on this show or things that I wrote when I was 26, 27. You know, we all, like, people need time to be too earnest or too whatever, too sincere, too bad, all of those things. And it's hard to just do that in public.

And for that, I wish her the very best. And I hope she finds some badness in her. But here's the difference. There is a difference. you guys are genuinely those people. I don't like buy anything happening in karma. Right. I feel like the whole thing is maybe.

Yeah, this very calculated move to go bad girl when what they really should have done was like, you need to go do a bunch of ayahuasca and then like live on the streets for a week. I don't know. You need to like go do something that makes you. Find yourself. Yeah. It just shows that. And I think that's why I keep doing the.

like lip out. It just shows that she's trying to find herself. Yeah. And she hasn't figured it out yet. Yeah. And it's clear. Yeah. And it's okay. At 20, you don't know yourself yet. No. So I get what she's trying to do. I hope that she like learns from getting ripped apart. Yeah. And like grows from it and doesn't just like beat her down. Right. But it doesn't seem like it is because like she's openly saying like I've been calculating this. I've been waiting to get to this moment. Like, which is. I'm like this moment but you know I'm happy for her

and her and her being that like trying to be a gay icon is it is a cool move from like little girl glitter sneaker brand person to being like actually I'm gay but right now it's like girl you need to spend some more time of the gay club because it's clear you're not

like in it at all I think that's right and that's why the like I'm inventing gay pop thing is is so tough because again, it's like you're newly out, you're so excited. But then you got to be like, okay, what community am I a part of now? I got to learn, you know, and it's not just about me. And I feel like that's that that's the tough part for.

I feel like you can't hang your hat on just like being gay anymore anyways as just like your whole move. It's like we've got to get more than that. And we're not getting that. We're getting this like girl on girl action in the music video. but again, it just feels like they're puppets on puppet strings. Like I would buy the sex scene with the puppets and being John Malkovich over what I'm seeing in that music music. Yes, honestly, it's the cartwheel.

The cartwheel, immediately, I'm just like, I'm not turned on by a cartwheel. I'm never going to be turned on by a cartwheel. I feel like there was a time too where, like, yeah, people would be like, my girlfriend, that's right, my girlfriend. and you'd be in a conversation with someone you'd be like, I'm not alarmed by that. Like, you don't have to do like a dramatic reveal, you know, like it's fine.

Yeah. But I think she's just a very dramatic reveal. For her. That's right. I like women. Which was big for, and huge for her. Yes. Totally, totally, totally.

But I think, right, in the, in the where pop culture is right now, it's not like a record scratch moment to be like this young woman is gay. Like most 20-year-olds are a little gay now. And that's great. And I love that for them. And I just want her to, yeah, I feel so, I mean, it's fucking Nickelodeon, right?

Like, she came from that world. I just want her to be okay. And I, I, Miley did really sail through her. She did not, I mean, it was rough, but like she really made it through. There was some rocky waters. Yeah, but she made it through. And I do want Jojo to make it through.

I think we all do. Totally do. Smoke some blunts Jojo. Yeah. in there. Get a big stuff teddy bear. I really think that's what's missing. I think she needs wheat. And I mean, even Miley, I saw her one interview. She was talking about, you know, when she was Hannah Montana on tour, being on mushrooms at the airport, it's 17. Like, Miley saw some shit. You know what I mean? And I don't know. Maybe Jojo has two, but she's not

channeling it yet. So 20 year old, that's the news from 41 year old, Ludwig Neely. Yes. Oh, the sachette man has something to say. I have sachets. And I am curious to hear about what the sachet has to think about the Taylor Swift playlist that were released.

Apparently, you haven't talked about this yet, Hold on. This is like breaking a lot of people's brains because of the categories that Taylor Swift put her songs in under her heartbreak playlist. And of course this is all in lead up to the dead poets. Tortured. Dead poets. Dead poets.

It's the dead poet society as far as I'm concerned. Yeah, I keep calling it dead poet society. I think I'm landing on that. I think once you are, at least for me, I'll mention again, I'm 41. Once I, one of the things they allow you to do once you're past 40 is call things the things. They're absolutely not like an album title. Like I've been called dead poet's site. not dead name, but I'm going to call dead poets.

I'm going to have a dead name Taylor Swift's new album. You're a dead name the album, yes. Because I just don't have the brain space. Yeah, it's not being rude. My mind cannot put any more titles of albums in it. So if it sounds like a movie I used to watch in middle at high school, that is now the name of it. So we've been calling a dead poet society over here. And she made an annoying title name and she has to live with the consequences.

I'm sorry, Taylor. It's annoying. All are all red, lover, fearless, one word, reputation. It's in that dome immediately. Okay, but so these playlists, they're all of her existing songs

and everyone's flipping shit. I follow a lot of Mormon women who love Taylor Swift, and it is... Wow, that's quite a niche following. I don't know what, I don't know how it happened. I was looking for, you know,

interior design and inspiration, and then next thing I know, Mormons. I don't know, Jackie. Sometimes you're in parenting land and you're like, oh, this person has advice for how to parent. This person has advice for how to parent. The Mormons have tons of kids.

They're all parent influencers. That is true. They're very good at parenting. You're right. You are right. You follow all the parent influencers. They'll tell me what bag to get that will fit all the kids stuff in it. They're very good at that.

And they also love Taylor Swift, which I do think is interesting. But anyway, my understanding is it's five playlists of our existing songs. and they are all They're about the five stages of grief of grief slash a breakup And I just, I feel like it is important to emphasize that it's the five stages of a breakup. It is also the five stages of grief.

But I just, I don't know, the conflation of the word grief and the older I get, the conflation of like the actual concept of grief with a breakup, I think is a little bit whatever. Man, we're really showing our age in this episode, huh? We're just like, that's not good. Grief, I'll give you grief. Yeah, we know back in the war.

Taylor Swift. I had the battlefield. Doesn't know grief. Oh, your boyfriend's not your boyfriend anymore. You think that's grief. I used to go door to door, knocking out people's door with a resume in my hand, and they would all go,

why are you trying to give me your resume? I'm just in my apartment right now, and I would say because that's how you get the job every time. It never worked once. Oh, damn it. I don't know. Drudging through the snow with a resume in my hand. Call me when you got bigger problems than a handsome man who doesn't want to date you.

I do think next time I'm, next time like, if one of you guys, like, somebody's going through a breakup, I'm going to put a mix CD together, but only of my songs. Yes. Give it to them. Well, the big issue to see how they react. Which, of course, the Swifties, because Swifties are truly insane, have to, like, sniff through and put things together. And everybody that's anybody knows that the song, you. You're my lover. Is about Joe.

Evil fuck tiny dick. He's not bad. He's fine. He's absolutely. I feel so. He's not about feeling bad for somebody. I don't feel bad for Joe Joe. I feel bad for just Joe.

I feel bad for just Joe. Just Joe. Just Joe didn't do anything except to date her as far as we know. Could you imagine being with someone and going through a whole relationship thinking you were going to get married? I still wonder that they even. got engaged at one point and then have the relationship fall apart. And then years, like two years later, a year at least later, an entire album about your whole relationship, but only from the perspective of the other person.

And especially after on one of these playlists, Taylor put the song Lover on the I Love You, it's Ruining My Life playlist. Love the name of that song. Which, do you think she did it because it's about Joe and they're broken up? Or do you think that she did it because at the time of writing it that it was like a song? Because like apparently it's like at every table I'll save you a seat. And that was because and that was because he was never around. And so like the lines of lover are actually like her like and I'll go where you go.

and it's because, like, she always had to follow him and she never could take the lead. So, like, Swifties are just ripping this, of course, apart now. I love it. I, yes, I mean, especially the chorus to Cruel Summer, which is, you know, I don't want to keep secrets just to keep you. And all that stuff, you know, like, all that is a sentiment to, like,

I don't want to be secretive about our relationship. I love our relationship. And I want to, you know, I want people to know about it. And Joe's just going, I don't like to tell people about me business, inn'n it? You know, and it's like, isn't it? Small dick me have. Yeah.

I heard him say. Tiny weenermie, me got. Please don't make it out blim about how much you hate me. Oh, she is. Back in your cage with the chair on top. It's just like, what is that? Yeah, why did you have to be in the chair cage? Well, I'm just mad because I want the damn playlist and they're only on Apple music.

And I don't have Apple music. I think that there's dupes on Spotify. Who uses Apple music? People just make, people just recreate. the lists on Spotify. Oh, okay, all right. You know what I mean? You can get all the playlists.

All right. The curating done by Taylor was done on Apple Music, but then people just put it together, I think, on Spotify. And the names of the, the name of the sadness list is you don't get to tell me

about sad songs. I just, I love Taylor. It's just so heavy-handed. And so, like, ag-groom. I'm like, I'm not trying to tell you about sad songs, Taylor. Why are you yelling at me, you know? I will say, too.

I think my one complaint when it comes, don't, Swiftie is. trigger warning. Whoa. Swiftie's big, trigger warning. Well, I feel like often, one thing I do notice is like

she's always like the hero of her songs and rarely do you get a song where she admits. She's criticizing herself? Yeah, she criticizes herself. And I think that like, I think a lot of people need those songs, those types of songs.

So it's like, it's not like they're not like a good use, but even this is serving up a lot of like, you were a fucker in our relationship. I'm hoping to get a little bit of some self-understand, you know, acknowledgement of like... Self-reflection. Self-doubt? I mean, she does self-doubt, I guess.

Self-doubt. Fairly well. Yeah. But, yeah, I was also thinking about this, I was thinking back on our conversation with Beyonce and Jolene and everything. And I was like, so much of Beyonce's music, what's so, like, what really resonated with me when I first started listening to Beyonce was, like, the confidence. But then also, it's like, you don't want.

on only confidence because there's just more of a range of human emotions than that. And that's not, and I actually have come around a little bit more on Jolene now. And I'm like actually, maybe, like, Jackie did say this last week, like, maybe it's like projected confidence, but actually there's like interiority there. And it's not all confidence, you know. And so I feel, but that is a, I've been thinking about this too with like introducing what music I want to introduce to my kids. It's like, sometimes they'll be like, why even with like, you know, you might have a song where it's like, it's all about the singer doubting themselves or thinking that they're not good enough.

Yeah. And with kids, sometimes it's like, you just wanna be like, listen to this empowered woman and listen to this empowered woman. But of course, you can't protect, sometimes I'm like, should I play them this song that's all about like self-doubt and self-hatred? And I'm like, I don't wanna introduce those concepts to them.

But of course, you're not introducing those concepts to them. They live within them. They live within them. Right, right. Like all, even kids, they all have self-doubt, they have insecurity, they have. So it's like, I think that's a very salient point you made Holden about like sometimes Taylor, it's like you want more vulnerability.

And you get, you get a little bit of it. I'm actually thinking of the song she did with Phoebe Bridgers on the, I think that was Red Vault tracks talking about like how, you know, I thought I knew everything at 19. Why do I knew nothing? Nothing at 22, that kind of thing. And I do like that a lot. But yeah, I think that's why Olivia Rodriguez is connecting with so many. so many young people. Because it's filled with tracks about how imperfect she thinks she is and how, you know, I'm gross, I'm ugly, that track is great. Ugo over here, table for Ugo. That's a good one. I'm going to wear my Ugs today because I feel ugly. I love that song, though. I do.

I get her in that one, yeah. Come as a bitch, Jackie. I know, Jojo. I know you've got things to say. I know you want to. I know. Let's be a lesbians together. I know. We can all be fun lesbians together, which really sounds great.

I'd love to be fun lesbians with JoJo Siwa. And especially like riding around, dressed like kiss, I would look amazing dressed as kiss. You would. Also, I realize we should actually take this moment to address something because I think that we haven't brought this up yet. We've been talking a lot about Taylor's new album coming out on the 19th. which is of course traditionally April Reels Day. But I think we need to get this out now. It's coming out the week before.

We, for a few different reasons, we have decided to at least take this year off from April Reels Day. I think the biggest one being that we literally can't get anyone else to do the day with us. No one will do it with us. Everyone is scared of April Reel's Day. We were running out of shit to Reels each other with.

We have truthed each other. many years now. I gave you my fucking truths. I've given you all of the truths. I've got no more truth. Any other truths we have, we just talk about it openly because we're so, because that's what April Reels Day has done for us. But isn't that nice? April Reels opened up the communication flow for us to encourage actual truthful communication. And we want to thank you April Reels Day for giving this, but I do encourage other people to still practice April Reels Day. Or at the spirit of April Realtz. It's about consent.

Yes. Remember it's about consent. Yes. And we could not get anyone to consent. So we had new people to Reels. But we will say this. If it works out schedule-wise, MJ will hopefully be dropping in

on at least some of Jacket with the Holdies. The Dead Poets Society. Which would be the day that the new Tei album dropped. So, and she honestly, we kind of need to make room for her to April Reels Joe Outwin so hard. Yes. Oh my God, I can't wait. It is Taylor Swift is taking the April Reels Day mantle and trothing Joe Alwyn about what a tiny dick British man he is.

And we can all do that together. So, yeah, M.J.O. joins that. We'll, like, celebrate April Reels Day kind of in a more general way. The spirit. And if you want to play at home, we still say, you know, if it's a great holiday. And if you haven't heard of April Reels Day, it's something we've been doing for the past several years. MJ Jackie and I first started just Jackie and I Because I was too afraid to do it

Yes back when you were too afraid to do it And we essentially the game The day is celebrated in this way You have to come up with at least one Two maybe three reels that you need to tell the other person Something you've been meaning to tell them Kind of get it off your chest It doesn't have to be negative per se

But it's uncomfortable Something you feel uncomfortable Saying to the other person Because it's just an honest truth But it can't cross the line And we always use the example I hate your fucking wife because nothing good can come of that.

It's only, that's just something that would cause problems. It does nothing. It has to be like something more honest, like a genuine. I'm trying to, oh, like. Like telling me that I should quit smoking. Yeah, like saying, hey, you need to quit smoking. You're like, your voice is suffering and it is not a good look and people, you know, look to you and why are you still smoking?

And I stopped. Yeah. I stopped, I think like three weeks later. Yeah. After smoking cigarettes for, I don't know, 12 years straight, never having stopped. Probably the best thing that's come out of the holiday thus far. Yes. And you want to get one of, like, you want to get some kind of a plastic slapping hand.

And if someone does go over the line, you'd get to slap them with the slapping hand. And you go back and forth until your reels are accomplished and out. And the tears have been shed. And that's how you celebrate. I love hearing that people celebrate at home in their own way. and we want to still encourage it, but we literally, maybe if we can get some, I'm sorry, not Roob, some friend to join us in the future.

We will try it anew. My favorite was how hard Henry laughed when I was like with us, and he's like, why the fuck would I ever do that? So anyways, but we will celebrate in a more general way on Jacket with the Holdies. Luckily, it just so happens. It's on the... It's a Friday, babe.

It's a Friday. It's the April night. And we always celebrated 19th. We always say it's the day before 420, and then on 420 you can smoke weed to kind of forget. That said also. Smoke the pain away. Also, my 12-hour stream I did, I promised an Aeros watch-along,

and I am looking to potentially do that on 420. So we do have some fun events happening, hopefully, that weekend. So stay tuned for all of that. But anyways, what we got next on the docket, Jackie. I mean, we were talking about kids earlier, and I don't know how we feel. I'm very surprised. by this headline.

Shakira says her sons thought the Barbie movie was emasculating. Why are you doing this, Shakira? Just have a conversation with them about it. Why would you say this public? Like her children are 11 and 9. Okay, but I think that this should encourage a conversation as to why they feel this way. Yeah. Your 11 and 9-year-old watched Barbie and went,

this is a masculating mother, which, I don't know if that is true. A couple things. First of all, she said she kind of agrees with them, which just leads me to believe she didn't actually finish the movie. Because if she had finished the movie, she would have seen the whole part about being empowered and men being masculated. Because we need to masculate our men more. That's what I'm really trying to hear. Yeah, I really think it's, we've really been missing out on it. And I think that we need to see it more in our media.

Men-masculation era, for sure. She says, she's like, I agree to a certain extent. I'm raising two boys. I want them to feel powerful too while respecting women. I like pop culture when it attempts to empower women without robbing men of their possibility to be men, to also protect and provide. I believe in giving women all the tools and the trust that we can do it all

without losing our essence, without losing our femininity. I, what? literally with the movie. Literally the point of the movie. It's tough. It's tough to be like, I didn't understand the movie. And I'm not even like, listen, I think Barbie was a great movie. I enjoyed it a lot. And also, it's

internal politics or, like, I wouldn't want to write a dissertation on it. I don't think it's the most solid text on patriarchy, right? It was, what was great about it was that it introduced the concept of patriarchy to millions of, and like, named it, and America

Ferreira's monologue really named and described things. A lot of people I think had never heard voiced before. But it is just strange for Shakira to be like, I missed the point of the movie because my nine and eleven year old boys didn't get the point of the movie. And like, it should be a conversation. It would make sense that a nine and eleven year old boy would be like, what's going on with the men in this movie? I don't understand it. That would be actually a great opening to a conversation. I think a nine and 11 year old boys probably should see the movie. And then they could ask questions, be like, what is going on here? Actually, the way that they're treating the men is supposed to kind of symbolize the way that

women are treated in society. Oh, that's the conversation. I feel like watching the first 15 minutes in Jurassic Park and shutting it off and being like, I don't get it. Why don't we have Jurassic Parks today? Why wouldn't we just have them? Like, this is so dumb. You know, why are people so stupid?

Yeah, you go and visit them and then you can leave. Like, it makes sense. What's even the point? Yeah, and honestly, they're 9 and 11. I'm sure they were just mad because Super Mario wasn't in it. You know what he mean? Just like, it's ridiculous. Like, completely absurd.

Shakira. I'm just surprised that she said it in a magazine interview. Again, like, yes, important conversation to have with your children. I just was a little shocked. Yeah, but I'm still upset. We could maybe talk more about it as a leftovers because I know we have to get to the list. But Kirsten Dunst and Jesse Plemons sounds to be like better parents than me, okay? Because sometimes I give my kids a phone at the restaurant.

And they don't. They never would. They never would. They never would. I raise my children to talk. I thumb my nose at that. Yeah. Well, you know what? I feel like that. Exactly. You know what those kids have in their lives right now? The hours of the slog, my friend. I bet those kids are so fucking bored all the time and so miserable because they probably also live in one of those, like wooden interior houses that they're trying to make look, look and feel like it's from the 1800s. My buddy's mom had one of those houses and everything. They had like a yarn twine spinner in the corner that no one used. Like rumple stilts can fucking comes in there and uses once a month.

You know, shit like that. They're like, why don't you make a quilt today instead of enjoying, you know, fucking, what's it, frozen? You know what I mean? Yeah. They're just like, I just want to watch the witch, you know, sing this all. I love them.

They're the cutest people in Hollywood for sure. I just love their marriage. They're a fantastic parents. I know, I love them. But what do you get out of being like, I would never give my kid an iPad? Like, I don't know. It just feels like good.

for you guys. I'm basing everything on power of the dog, but I really do think they live like that, and I really think it sucks to be a kid. Because they're just like, why don't you just go play with the whistleweeds outside? I'm like, what the fucking talking about? All my friends are playing fucking Roblox! Let me have friends!

Although it is very cute, the picture of her kid. You can't see the face of the kid, but the kid's holding a Spider-Man umbrella and the caption just says, he has no clue his mom was MJ. And I think that's very, cute that like loves Spider-Man

didn't even know that his mom's in the movie. That's very cute. I mean, not the best Spider-Man, but you know, it was one of them. Well, before we get to the list, we got to get to the celebrity conspiracy. Hit me with the share. Do you believe it? Did Miley steal the idea for flowers from Bruno Mars? That's right.

Miley Cyrus on the lips lately. No, but this is kind of interesting. This is actually more of an interesting exploration of copyright laws. This one comes in from R.E. who writes, last year, Miley Cyrus released her single flowers to extreme international success. Beyond all odds, however, I somehow managed to have only heard it for the first time about a month ago, despite working in a grocery store that plays music even when the store is closed. I like the song, but it instantly reminded me very strongly of an early Bruno Mars song.

In 2013, Bruno Mars released his song when I Was Your Man, a ballad that while popular at the time, didn't seem to have the lasting impact that some of his other songs did. Still, it pops up on the radio just enough that I was able to recognize, how similar Miley's song is. Most notably, the lyrics and the choruses of the songs are quite similar. And his song, Mars, talks about all the things he wants to have done for his ex, such as buying flowers, holding hands, taking her dancing. In Cyrus's song, she sings about being able to do things without her ex, including buying flowers, holding hands and dancing. While the lyrics are not exactly the same, even the rhyme schemes are similar. I looked at the

credits for the song Flowers on Spotify, but it makes no mention of Mars's work, nor did it on its Wikipedia page, on the Wikipedia page, though, for When I Was Your Man, there is a section that mentions Miley's song. And here it is from the Wikipedia page. In January 2023, American singer Miley Cyrus released the single Flowers. Its chorus is a paraphrase of the one on When I Was Your Man. However, the song's similarities are not based on sampling. Thus, writers of the latter song do not need to be credited as writers of flowers. It's interesting. In a cool way, the copyright law doesn't apply to lyrics like that. However, I would argue that the song is sampled. in flowers.

While the choruses don't have the same melodies, the chorus of flowers does have a remarkably similar sound to the melody used in the verse of when I was your man. I'd say listen for yourself a good pair of them, but in my opinion, the similarities in the sound plus the paraphrased chorus means that Bruno Mars should be out for Miley's blood. Whoa. Or failing that, writing credit for flowers.

I love you all, and I'd love to hear what y'all think about this. Also, I know the M&M drama happened like a year ago, but let me know if you want to hear the conspiracy about the two M&Ms who might be trans icons and also girlfriend. Cheers Ari. Yeah. Meet that one.

It's a yeah. It's a big old, yeah. But anyways, yeah, I thought that was just an interesting. And actually, I saw a really funny video of a guy. His back was turned to the karaoke screen, and they were playing, Olivia Igerie goes two steps forward, one step back. And you had to guess the song by singing it.

And the piano comes in and he goes, there's glitter on the, floor after the party and start singing New Year's Day by Taylor Swift because that's completely pulled, kind of inspired and pulled from. But she openly said that. She openly said, I was inspired by this, like, the piano part of this song. Yes, but it is funny when you can, when you're like, wait, that's the same idea. Isn't Tay like one of the writers on the song?

Yeah, they added her. They added her name. And there was Paramore as well. We've like talked about it before. I remember talking about it. Yeah. Paramore got added and Tay got added. and Tay got added later, I think, after a lawsuit.

But Tay was, I think, already included. And what's his name? Mr. Glasses Man, who does all of her songs. Jack Antenna? Yeah, Jack Antenna. Mr. Glasses, man. Mr. Glasses. He should go by that.

I knew who you were talking about. He should go by Mr. Glasses, because he always has the glasses on. He's a Mr. Man. It's interesting because I think that Flowers sounds like a Bruno Mars song. And I know the writer is talking about the lyric. But I think that the sound sounds exactly like a Brito Omar's son. Right. Totally.

Yeah. Yeah, for sure. I absolutely agree with that. Because that has like an old school vibe to it. Yeah. Do you believe? Yeah, I believe. I'm sorry.

Yeah, I guess, yeah, we are believers. But again, please write in about that other conspiracy. Yeah. Because I'd like to hear more about it. Because the M&Ms and their genders are very upsetting to, you know, the conservatives. They have cloacas. Yeah. Always down to talk about it.

Because at first I thought you meant the rapper. Me too. What is that mean? So I was even more, I was more intrigued but more confused. Anyway, it's time for the list. Don't worry. Who's on the list? Jackie, got to have that list.

Celebrity facts that range from wildly shocking to just completely bizarre. Osama bin Laden was a major Whitney Houston fan. Celebrity facts? Hold on that type of celebrity. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I guess Whitney Houston is the celebrity. Yes, Osama bin Laden was a major Whitney Houston fan. Apparently he said that he had a paramount desire for Whitney Houston,

and although he claimed music was evil, he spoke of someday spending vast amounts of money to go to America and try to arrange a meeting with the superstar. She even claimed Bin Laden planned to kill Bobby Brown, whom she was married to at the time. Weirdly wouldn't be opposed to that. I think, you know, we would understand. But I was just really, I was reeled in by this list because of that fact, because that was

something that I did not know. Wow. Yeah, that's crazy. That is, that is, I don't even know what to say about that one. Yes. Now, this one I did know about, but in case you forgot, because the person writing this list did not know about this, maybe I'm the last one to know this, but I only just learned that Snoop Dogg was charged with first degree murder in 1993.

Snoop's bodyguard at the time McKinley Lee shot and killed Snoop's rival gang member, Philip Wolder Merriam, from Snoop's car while Snoop was driving. According to Lee, Wolder Miriam was reaching for his gun and fired on him before he could draw his weapon. Snoop's lawyer also claimed self-defense and said, Wolder Mariam, had threatened Snoop's life numerous times. I'm so glad they included that last name so many times. And here we return to Jojo Siwa, because Snoop Dog put a song out, you probably remember Jackie called

Murder was the case that they gave me, which was absolutely based on this whole situation. Murder was the case that they gave me. Because back in the day, people would put songs out about the real shit that they were going through and not some, it's not some made up thing. No, no.

He literally was in, I mean, I remember the footage on like MTV News and stuff. Like he was in a courtroom being tried for murder and he was riding high at that point on doggy style. You know, he'd blown up in the houses of America, much to the parents' chagrin. Yeah, that's right. And that's why I started drinking gin and smoking devils weed. Yeah, gin and juice, baby. Yeah, private school was never the

same after that. Yeah, I bet. Julia Roberts, who would later star in Runaway Bride, really was a runaway bride. In 1991, days before she was going to marry Kiefer Sutherland, Roberts called off her wedding. On the day she was supposed to be married, she instead went on a date with Jason and Patrick, who was friends with Sutherland, but had recently been uninvited from the wedding, and they ran away together to Ireland. This is like the most interesting thing I've ever heard about Julia Roberts.

Right? Wow. Yes. And Kiefer Sutherland. Why isn't this a more popular fact? Dude, how hot must that have been? Yeah. You know, the sex in Ireland.

This must have been around sleepers, right? Is that the time period of sleepers? Sure, but I don't think they were sleeping. I think they were, I'm knocking the boots. That's right. I'm bringing it back. Knock into the boots. Knock in the boots. No, now I need to think about it.

Julie Roberts was in a movie with Kevin Bacon. It's one of the quintessential Kevin Bacon game movies. It's not called sleepers. Where they like have to bring people back to like, it's not called sleepers. Oh, back to life. Oh, what is that movie? Oh, my God. And scroll forever on his IMDB.

Everyone is screaming at their cars right now. Oh my God. What is the name of it? Flatliners. Flatliners. Flatlin. Kiefer Sutherland is also in it. All I wanted to say, I really had nothing.

I just couldn't continue until I remembered flatliners. Now, all right, we all know. Jason Patrick is hot. I just want to put that out there. I think I'd rather bang him than Kiefer. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I think you need to rewatch the three musketeers before you say that. Now, we know that Nick Cannon has claimed multiple times that Mariah Carey

would sometimes play her music when they would have sex. in particular, her song, Hero. Which I didn't realize that that was in particular. That's the least sexy song. I'm very surprised, but who also does that is Usher. Usher also listens to his own music. That makes sense. His music is sex music.

It's sex music. Some may say this would be rather narcissistic, but yeah, I think I do a pretty good job at it. I'm a good motivator for the moment. He reveals he puts on a playlist during sex saying, I like to set the mood. As for songs, he likes to listen to you, he named Lesoth. for loves and dive, adding that climax would be a good one towards the end of the playlist of his own songs is pretty funny.

Own fuck songs. But he did make a lot of fuck songs. That's a little different. Exclusively fuck songs. Yeah. Yes. Yeah, just don't fuck Tiny Tim. Tell you what.

It's going to be rough for you. Tip to through the tulips. That tiny Tim? Or the one with the... I got to go. Yeah, my pants wear my pants. I'm good. As long as you're not talking about the little frog, then we're fine.

Now, this is another thing, a bit of trivia that I feel like everyone needs to remember. Fran Drescher claimed that when she was younger, she was abducted by aliens who put a chip in her head and that the same thing happened to her ex-husband, Peter Mark Jacobson. She truly believes this. She says, you know, it's funny because Peter and I both saw aliens before we knew each other, doing the same thing, driving on the road with our dads. We were both in junior high. A few years later we met

and we realized that we had the same experience. I think that somehow we were programmed to meet. She continued that they both have scars in the same spot where the chips are. Though the aliens programmed them to think that the scars were from something else. Sounds like we know the basis of their marriage. Wow. Wow. But I think that

I believe that that was the ex-husband that they're still very good friends, but he later came out and left her. So, you know, but I think they still hang out all the time. So I guess, like, if you get abducted together, then that's a forever relationship. Fuck, yeah, dude. It's rock and roll. Not the only person who's been abducted by an alien, so has Sammy Hagar.

He told MTV, aliens were plugged into me. It was a download situation. This was long before computers or any kind of wireless. There were even wireless telephones. Looking back now, it was like, fuck, they downloaded something into me. Or they uploaded something from my brain like an experiment. See what this guy knows. Yeah.

I'm always wondering. It's a download or an upload. I mean, come on. This quote is so good. It was a download situation. I want that on a sticker on my laptop. It was a download situation, guys. God, I wish.

I mean, I don't. I think it's like the more I'm. I'm starting to work on trying to get our Sims Abducted by Aliens over on our Sims of Our Lives with Jackie and MJ. And I think that I've been thinking a lot about getting abducted by aliens. So I think that's also why I was drawn to this list.

I don't think I want it to happen, but it would make for an interesting story. Would you rather get fucked by a ghost or abducted by aliens? Fucked by a ghost. Yeah. Easy. Oh, yeah.

Fuck by a ghost. Because I feel like you're either getting fuck my ghost were raped by aliens. I'm gonna go with the ghost. I want to fuck that ghost. And I think that we're gonna have a great time with it. I need a probing to have. I don't need a science experiment to happen on my beehole.

Right. I guess the aliens are famous for non-consensual probing. Yeah. Yeah. That's all they want to do for some reasons. And the ghost could look like a Sigourney Weaver in some capacity, which I'm definitely here for it. Yeah.

You know, we can't 100% confirm this, but it's been reported that Brad Pitt brings his own toilet seat to hotels and unfamiliar houses, as it, quote, grosses him out, not knowing who used the bathroom before him. Oddly, though, there were reports in 2005 that Pitt had bought a jailhouse toilet with a matching sink and wanted to install it in his home with Jennifer Aniston, which Aniston apparently disagreed with. Is he, does he pee sitting down? I don't know.

Because you probably don't even have to touch your butt to most toilets when you're out. What is he just shit everywhere he goes? I mean, yeah, exactly. He's got a shitting problem. Those are the only two options. He has a shitting problem or he be sitting down. Yeah, I don't really take, I mean, yeah, I get my one good one in in the morning. I usually am not in a foreign space needing to take a dump.

You know what I mean? But I will say, I used to be one of those people who, like, we went on a trip for a weekend. I wasn't dump until, like, I got home, which I can't believe I used to do that. I can't, I don't know how I did it. Yeah. People really, I'm glad that the body settles into a routine as you get older because I remember the kids in high school who would lead to drive home, you know, to, or wouldn't, just wouldn't go in high school. And at the time, I thought those people were crazy.

But now, maybe I was crazy to not have those boundaries. Secret bathroom. Poop it in a high school, kill me. You got to find a secret bathroom. If it's a large enough campus, like there was the upstairs bathroom by the art classes in the morning was almost never occupied, ever. And there was a private bathroom if I really needed to blast it out in the backstage. of the theater and I'd go scamper back there and do my dirty little dirty shit poop shit dirty shit boy oh I'm so glad that we're talking about this well last but not least Kanye

taking the mic from Taylor Swift at the 2009 MTV Video Music Awards will go down in pop culture history but I was shocked to learn that this wasn't even the first time Kanye had done this in 2006 he'd gone on stage at the MTV European Music Awards after the French group Justice won best video and taken the mic from them to rant about how his video for Touch the Sky should have won, saying, quote, if I don't win, the award show loses credibility.

That's so crazy. This video costs a million dollars, fam. I had Pam Anderson. I was jumping across canyons. Get off the stage. Get out of here. And this was what he was at like the top of his game artistically, but still a mess of a mess of a.

person. Man, I love he did it once and then didn't learn his lesson and then it did it in an even more absurd worse way. Again, that is crazy. Absolutely insane. And, you know, there's a bunch more on this list that I might use next week. All right. So that's it for the list for you all today. There you go.

Love it. All right. And that means I'm going. Blind. It's items. Oh, we can't see them. I was worried you were going to include this as a story this week. So I was happy to see that it wasn't because it's a solid blind.

the foreign-born three-named actress. She's foreign-born, Canadian, maybe. Used to always talk about the movies she liked. So she was either lying then or lying now. It's a story recently about a three-named actress who in the past I've left off of any blinds because they're on the younger side, but they're aging up and gaffing.

And so I'm now allowed to. They're in a hit show, a hit streaming show. They are someone who talk about child star Kind of transitioning to adult star making moves Their last name is a color Their middle name is a cartoon I use start naming colors yellow Oh, Katerina Orange

Green, it's gonna be green Good guess, but green is a common last name Not Brian Austin Green No Black, no black No What I've named us the colors. Well, I was just talking about my experiences in high school. Maybe it's a color

related to that. Brown. All right. Brown. Pote Brown. Sister Wives. Is it the sister wives? Renamed actress, child starred who is now just now transitioned into semi-adult star. Something brown. Yeah. She, we were always kind of protective of her. A hit streaming TV show. Massively popular, three-named actress. All right, middle name. Let's try to guess the show. Let's try to guess the show. Oh, Millie Bobby Brown.

Millie Bobby Brown. Millie Bobby Brown. Absolutely. Did you see this? Recently, she was quoted as saying, recently she was quoted as saying, I don't watch movies in an interview about her movie coming out.

People come up to me and say, you should definitely watch this movie. It would change your life. And I'm like, how long do I have to sit there for? Because my brain and I don't even like sitting in my, sitting for my own movies. This sounds like a zoomer thing, honestly,

just like a young person. She's not like the other girls. It sounds like a young person thing. It's just a young person thing. I don't even know if these, I don't know. I was talking to a 32 year old a couple weekends ago going on and on about zoomers. And I was like, well, you must know you're a zoomer.

He's like, I'm not a zoomer. I'm 32. I am definitely a millennial. So I don't even understand who's who anymore. And what I think maybe, I think my kids are gen alpha, but I don't know where the distinction between teenagers now. I guess Millie Bobby Brown is 19 or 20. but yeah they probably not to sound like an old

but they are on their phones too much to sit through a movie yes 100% 100% I mean I even have had to I am a person who grew up a movie buff who grew up before smartphones and I've even had to create new rules for myself when I'm watching a movie that I put my phone I have to like force my phone away from me and I have other things that I specifically watch because I'm like oh this is a good show to have on

while I stare at my phone that's why I like to go to the movie theater. I like that I have to put my phone away. It forces me to not have my phone out. It's a real go to the movie experience. I guess you don't have to like movies and be a movie actress, but there's something about that that pisses me off. It's tough. It's tough. You're going to want to have some respect for your craft. Yeah. Why don't we? I think that's why it seems. Maybe keep that to yourself. I feel like that, but also, I feel like that was such a move to be like, I'm not like the other girls. I feel like she watches fucking movies. That's so stupid. She's not like the other girls. I know. But also again, part of me wants to say, okay, if I became famous at 11 years old, would I have like,

most of the movies I watched as a teenager was when I was like bored at home on a Saturday after a sleepover, you know, and I was like, all right, I'll watch this Alicia Silverstone movie. I was obsessed with movies at that age. I feel like I loved, loved, loved movies, you know. So I was trying to fill the void. the space, all that space, the hours of the slog, those poor kids, curs and dunce, you know. Okay, I'm going to put it out here for a call because the last time we asked the young people a question, we got such awesome and interesting responses.

If you are a young, like grew up with a phone, you know, I'm thinking under 25, what is, do you agree with Millie Bobby Brown? Are you not watching movies as much? Do you watch your movies with a phone? Because I also, sometimes we'll be watching a movie, and if I see Gideons on this phone, I'll, like, get pissy. You know, I'll be like, put the phone down. But like, you know, I get it.

People have to look at their phones, but it does, I feel nothing makes me feel more internal shame than I'm what I'm like. I can't even focus on the television because I'm looking at my phone. What's wrong with me? If we're watching a movie, and I feel like it's so different. If I'm watching like Love is Blind or something, that phone is up and down. But a movie, a real go-to-the-the- theater movie, like, I'm definitely going to be trying to focus and actually, like, absorb it. And yes, that's why movie theaters still matter. But yeah, maybe movies.

It's also why I love physical 100 because I have to read the subtitle. Yes. Maybe that's maybe what we're more getting towards is I might be mourning the loss of like the death of movies in my lifetime and I don't like that feeling. This is a sign of that. And I also am like I'm mourning the loss of like, I don't know, it's a whole other conversation. But the fact that kids just don't have any experience with just sitting there and being like, what do I do?

You know, teenagers especially like because you always have your phone. And that's just such a different brain. That's just such different brain. But honestly, I feel like I don't even have that capability. I don't have it anymore either. Agree. Totally agree. It's not a young person problem.

But we were lucky enough to have a stretch of our life where we didn't have that. You know, like, yes. I'm realizing new thing that I'm going to start doing because I did it last night and it was like this eureka moment of like, I miss this. I made like a really nice dinner for Lexi. And instead of putting on a podcast, I opted for jazz music. And there was like, I love making steak dinner because like the baked potatoes have to be in for like an hour.

There's all this like space in between actual doing something. And I just sat at a table and I listened to jazz music and drank a cup of wine and thought for the first time. Yeah. In fucking months. Yeah, dude. And it was like, why am I not doing this more often? I used to do this all the time. I used to get back, get home from class in college, put on a jazz album, light a joint.

drink a beer or a glass of wine and just stare out the window for like an hour. Yeah, I know. I used to look out the window for hours. I used to read a paper book. Yeah. When I was eating alone,

I would always have a paper book with me. I mourn that part, that space that my brain had. I like truly, truly mourn it. And I mourn it for young people who just haven't had that. But also probably they're listening to me and being like, ha ha,

you old coot. You know, that is what they're doing. Yeah, screaming. They definitely use a phrase from the 19-20s to describe you. I think that is the first. Yeah, so Reuben's podcast, Tetragrammaton or something like that has a weird name, but he had this like spiritual guide leader, not leader, but spiritual enthusiast. And he was talking about like the importance of contemplation.

And it got me thinking a lot about like because he literally every morning he brews up a cup of tea and he sits outside. and he actually actively contemplates for like an hour. Wow. I was like that, I missed that because I used to just do that because we just didn't have all this shit blaring at us. And so I used to just do that myself. I'd have a cup of coffee and smoke cigarettes and stare out my window in the morning.

And fucking it was great. All right, anyways, next blind. What you didn't hear the still very young A-List singer tell the fans of the older A-List singer but has been telling everyone in her circle for the past few weeks is I have an Oscar and she doesn't. Tay. So this young, Tay is the person who doesn't, right?

Doesn't have the Oscar, yeah. The person who does. Billy. Yes, good call. Yeah, because Billy Ilish recently had to be like, Ta-Tas, Swifties. I'm not going after Taylor with this record variant thing. Also, shout out's new albums, man, we are eating good at this part of the year

because Billy just announced her new album coming out, I believe, May 19. Yeah, dude. So right around the corner, we've got a new Billy Elish on the heels of a Taye. Man, we've got new good music. We also have, we've got great horror movies

coming out this year too. We just saw a horror movie and like all the trailers. I was like, I want to see that. I want to see that. Yeah, we've got a good horror movie year, y'all. Okay, wait, thank you. Really quick, speaking of things to look forward to

and also why phones are good. My phone just gave me an alert that Hilaria Baldwin hopes to become the newest Real Housewives of Beverly Hills cast member. Oh, please. I'll actually watch it if that happens. I'll actually watch it. Oh, man.

Just watching Albaal. That will get me into the house slides. Yeah, that will get me in. I'll watch it. The one named A-list actor slash entertainer is really hoping someone adds him as a number two on a ticket. Number two on a ticket being a political ticket. Oh. In this.

Kanye? No. But someone else who has been talked about as potentially one day. The rock. Yes. I believe it. on like a Biden Is he fission?

Well, I don't know what ticket because lately he just went like, I'm not going to support a candidate this year because I get scared when people don't like me. He just recently did that because he's a big old coward about that stuff. He's like, I just want to bring everyone together and I don't want to like,

I know last time like when I said I said vote for Biden or that I'm voting for Biden, like people got mad at me. Like complete dickheads got really bad at me, but still I need their love. just like I need everyone's love. So I'm not going to go speak out for a candidate this time around. So maybe he's trying to get political.

Oh, yeah. I googled the rock politics and. No. results are good. Oh, yikes. But he wouldn't be it. I don't even think it's that. I think he literally just is afraid of pissing off anyone, much less like,

therefore red hats, you know? Yeah, yeah. I think it's just one of those where he was like, I don't like what people get upset with me ever for anything, because I'm the rock, so I'm just going to, like, be scared for the rest of my life. I mean, but how funny it would be, how funny would it be if the Biden campaign was like, the rock, would you like to be the VP? Oh my God.

And the rock was like, yes, Biden is, you know, has one foot in the ground, but the rock is very, very alive. He can just walk him around to different places. He never has to trip and fall over again because the rock will just carry him. Yeah, he'll never fall again when he has the rock carrying him like a baby. Well, there you have, and those are the blinds. I can see again, and I see we're at the end of our show. Thank you so much. Oh, my God.

Thank you all so much for join us. I don't know what happened. I don't know what was happening with my mouth, but sometimes things just fall out of it. And thank you so much for joining us on this episode of page seven. My name is Jackie Zabrowski. You can follow me on Instagram at Jack That Worm,

and you can come hang out, which hopefully I don't know if our Sims are going to be abducted by aliens anytime soon, but maybe they will be. I don't even know. The Sims of Our Lives, 8.30 a.m. Pacific Standard time, 11.30 a.m. Eastern standard time over on Twitch.com. On Twitch.combe forward slash, oh, no, it's Jackie. On Wednesdays, come join us.

Speaking of Twitch, Twitch.combe forward slash hold nater so on Fridays. Jackie, me, we party, 6BM. ET on Jack up with the Holdies. And MJ will join us hopefully for April Reels Day to celebrate in our own way this year. and it did more drunken shenanic anyway. Also also Patreon.com 4 slash page 7 podcast weekly bonus episodes, readings, all that good stuff. You get so much for the $5 value.

And on the $10 layer, we got that Buffy watch along going strong. We are now in the season two. We just did our first double drop. Every now and again, we will try to drop two episodes at once. We'll see how that goes. We're still just trying to work out

our production schedules and everything, especially now that we've added talking TV as a release coming soon, where we talk about TV. Check us out, patreon.com.com ford slash page 7 podcast, and please page 7 podcast at gmail.com. I need some new conspiracy theories stat, if you don't mind. Page 7 podcast at gmail.com. My name is MJ and I'm MJKLKat on Instagram. Have a great week, everybody. Bye, everybody. This show is made pop. by listeners like you.

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