Page 7 - Ep. 547: Punk Rock, Baby!

Episode Date: August 8, 2024

This week Holden, Jackie and MJ are gossin' 'bout being here.... now.... and forever, the new SAAAAUCY Billie and Charli XCX single, shouts to Chappell Roan for having the largest Lollapalooza crowd EVER and for taking down her gross ex in front of it, Kamala Announced her very brat VP pick, Snoop Dogg and Martha are BFFs and she explains fancy horse dancing to him. Everyone at the Olympics is makin' and tradin' pins, STRONGASS Rugby player Ilona Maher shuts down BMI bullshit and ends with a perfect roast, and more Olympic talk ranging from Imane Khelif being bullied by weird bigots to MJs babies trying to recreate Olympic gymnastics on the couch with some not so Olympic landings to a pole vaulter wackin' his magnum dong off the bar, Giorgia Villa has sponsorship with BIG PARMESAN, Tom Cruise has a boring ass sad diet, and in Celeb Conspiracy: Did Sam Levinson rip off Euphoria!? A list full of times celebs acted reeeeally privileged, spoiled or demanding! Blindz and the SHOUTZZZZ Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast  Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Hey guys, this is Jackie Zabrowski from the Last Podcast Network, and ooh baby, do I have a juicy treat for you Law and Order SVU lovers out there? And it's a new parisocial relationship. Check out That's Messed up, an SVU podcast on the Exactly Right Network, hosted by two of my comedian friends, Kara Clank and Lisa Trager. Every week they break down an episode of Law and Order SVU, the true crime it's based on, and chat with an actor from the episode. I'm talking Margaret Cho, Matthew Lillard, and if you slip and slide at the thought of B.D. Wong,

well, get your ears prepared because it's getting wet out here. Check out, That's Messed Up, for all things, SVU, unfiltered hot takes, and more. Again, that's That's Mess Up, an SVU podcast, available wherever you get your beautiful podcasts. New Eps every Tuesday, and that's not messed up. All right, it's a bad joke. Oh, it's not what you expect. It's a little bit of a hornier start. What is this Jackie's book club?

I don't think it is. I want to try it, bite it, lick it, spit it, pull it to the side and get all up in it. Kiss it right it. Can I fit it? Charlie likes boys, but she knows I'd hit it. Yeah. It's not predatory and fuck off, you annoying internet people that say that the line, Charlie likes boys, but she knows I'd hit it because it's cheeky.

They're doing the song together. Can it be cheeky? It's a cheeky sexy song. Good Lord. They're collaborating. I'm pretty sure everybody's okay, guys. Everybody's okay. I think she consents to the line. It's okay. Charlie's running from a predator. And Billy can, Billy only sees by heat sense. So Charlie has to cover herself with muddine from the predator. No, no.

Yeah, so go hide in the woods, Charlie. Because Billy Eilish is going to come after you. Billy only, but Billy only needs the heads of her victims. That's my favorite line of the whole song. Yes, the clitoral heads. Thank you. I can't believe that people don't like it. That's my favorite line of the whole song.

It's my favorite line. Why do you think I sang the Billy Eilish verse of a Charlie XXX song? And yes, we are talking about the song guests, which Billy Eilis is featured on, which is a Charlie XXX song. And they just dropped this music video for it. And I don't mean to jump right into it. But Maui, wowie here for, I've watched the music video a couple of times since it has been released. It is, wow, sexy, sexy, sexy.

Very sexy. Very sexy, very fun. I'm loving it. I'm here for Brad Summer. I also shout us to Chapel Road for having the biggest crowd ever at a Lalaplusa ever. Insane. Where she called out her ex, who apparently was talking shit about her and her. her hometown.

Really? And she called him out, yes. No, no, no, well, bragging about, like, banging him and stuff. And he's engaged. Yes. So then she went on Lollapalooza and looked into the camera and was like, I know you've been talking about me. And it is going to get back to your wife, guaranteed.

And it was just like, what? Can you imagine? I hope that person's life got exploded. Kind of fun. Yeah. Wow. Love it. Although I will, to be fair, I'd probably also brag if I banged.

Chappelron. I'm blown away at the just surging popularity of one Chaparone and one Charlie XX. I've just like, I just know how to pick them. I'm just going to say, and so does Jackie, whatever, and MJ's whatever, but whatever, but whatever, whatever. I had to get you to like Chapel. You know that. I had to get you to like Chapel. At first, you're like, she's no Tay. She's no T. What are you kidding? I've never said that in my life. Are you serious? You're just trying to get comments at me. Yeah. Do not give me about that.

All one does. All one does. He takes the different female pop stars and he compares them and he puts them against each other. He's just like Taylor Swift. That's all he does. You said Beyonce more like Beehive, more like Neehive. And I was like, whoa. Wow, that does sound like something I would say and definitely not something Holden

to say. You're like, there are much more women or whatever. You said something like that. I win. You can never win the conversation. I'll always win it. Well, Jackie, maybe I know something you don't know, even though it's in the articles you posted, but I get to say it first because I am with it, people, so do not DM me. They donated the mini bras to hurt people. Where did they donate the bras to Holden? Don't look at the article. Where did they donate the bras to Holden?

A woman's world. Oh, women's world. You know it to a women's world, yeah. It's a charity called Women's World, colon, we're lucky to be living in it. It's called so soft, so strong, a love story dot, dot, dot, never told. Never told, full of bras. And what Holden was trying to volunteer to is the fact that in the very, very sexy music video that Charlie XX and Billy Elish released, there's like a huge, insane pile of thousands

of underwear and bras. And they donated all of the unused ones, which were all of them, to a, uh, uh, a survivor of domestic abuse situations. Our organization called Support the Girls. I support the girls. And thank you, Holden, for letting us know what the women are doing to support other female identifying people. We appreciate you.

So soft. So soft. And hey, and all you ladies out there, you're my guilty pleasure, dog. So let's go to the guilty pleasure house. Ew, that's what you're going to say to all the women that we're, your guilty pleasure. Carver's a bitch, baby. Man, you know what I'm saying?

You should have known better, Holden. You should have known better. Now, what the fuck were we talking about? Oh, man. Underwear. Underwear, MJ. Underware. You try to talk about my underwear predatory.

I'm upset, MJ. Don't do this to me. I can't even think about panties in your presence, MJ, all right? Because you're making me think about panties right now. And surprise. Yeah, there's a lot of panties. while watching the guest music. It's funny because Panis is one of those words

that I'm one of those people who can't deal with that word, but I can very much deal with this music video. I didn't even know that Billy and Charlie were friends. And man, do I like this music video? Do I like this song? The line, Charlie likes boys. But you know I'd hit it. I need.

Come on, I die. Sleep. It's all slip and slide and everybody. is invited. Nobody is, though, just my husband. Thank you very much. Whoa. We are really in a different air. You really switched gears on that. Everyone was allowed in. And now just one person's allowed it, Jackie. Well, it's like in the Sims where you can lock the door for other people. Like, you can lock doors specifically for certain people. So this door is locked.

Chichu-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-d-r-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-bbbbbbbbbbbbb- So many security measures. There's so many. Stay away from this, pussy. That's the alarm that goes off if you get close to it. But Charlie X-EX probably has one of those for, like, a lot of people, but I don't think she has one for Billy, okay? So everybody can relax. Yeah. They collaborated together.

I think they're cool. They're doing each other. And I, you know, and whatever happens in your brain is for you. range. That's pasture-raised smut that lives up here, right? And you can think about whatever you want to think about. Can't take that from me, brain, please. It's kind of new to see Billy in this, you know, I'm used to her just kind of singing slowly and sadly. And so it was kind of- This new album, man. Yeah, it was, this was new, new Billy to me. And I'm not, I will be the first to admit, I am only a casual Billy listener. But it was fun to see, like, bad,

girl, Billy. Yeah, well, that's how she started. I'm the bad guy. That was her first fucking big track. You know what I mean? And I thought, so I like anytime it harkens back to that energy, right? Even though she's kind of like too cool for school, even in that track, and she's like, I'm the bad guy. But still the music's like, and so I want more of that energy. You know what I mean? I love that when she gets a little bit of caffeine in her system. I think just start feeding her a little more coffee. You know what I mean? Maybe get some espresso in there. How different, we don't have to go into this, but my mind just went on a little what if.

How different would it be if, like, because last summer was ERA's summer and all anybody was talking about was that. What? Not us. Not us. Never us. No, but what if we were in this moment now with Kamala and Tim Walts? That news just dropped the day that we're recording and there's all these brat compilations for Tim Walts, which is very funny because he is like an extremely Minnesotan dad. And so, like, Kamala is brat is funny enough, but Tim Walt's, Tim Waltz is brat.

Is brat? I don't know. Tim Waltz is brat. I love it. You a sloppy ho, Tim Walts? It is. Come on over. Destroying me.

But I'm just so glad that Charlie XX is the soundtrack to this moment. I really, I just, I continue to be thriving in Brad Girl Summer only as it relates to the political moment that we're living in right now. Yes, because, you know, Brad Girl Summer is getting us everywhere, but who's taking us the rest of the way? It is Simone Biles, everybody, watching the Olympics. My brain at all times, I've just got the Olympics on in the background, usually on silent, and I just will like catch something going like, wow, what a feat of human strength. And then I continue on with my day, and I highly recommend it. Yes, yeah, having it on in the background, I forgot that that's, that, how important that is.

because then, yeah, you can just like, look, I just happened to catch that extremely cute moment yesterday on Monday night with the Brazilian gymnast doing her routine and then coming back to put on her glasses so that she could see her score. Oh, my God, she could see her score. She can't see without a glasses. She can't see without her glasses. And just so cute when they bowed down to the Italian gymnast who got the gold.

And because, oh, she is not only a queen, but she is a great. gracious queen. And, yes, the floor routine to, are you ready for it? It was really fun. Oh, you're running. I'm on it. Jackie has us, we, if you're not steeped in the Olympics, Jackie is here for you. Because I have been trying to watch as much Olympics as possible, but life gets in the

way sometimes. What do you have children or something? I haven't even, I can't believe I haven't showed them dressage, you know, for how much they love artistic swimming. They're going to love dressage, but I got to see. Artistic horsing. I'm artistic horsing. I know, but thanks to Jackie.

Now I know that Snoop Dog also loves Drissage. Although terrified of horses. And it was so cute. So there was this interview. I was trying to find it again. And I couldn't find an actual clip of it. It was Snoop and Martha. And there are multiple interviews, obviously, out with them.

But there was one specific one where they were sitting. And he was talking about how scared he was because Snoop, genuine fear of horses. So he brought Martha Stom. along because he was nervous and like Martha Stewart isn't is everyone knows she's like a huge equestrian and so he was just like do I just like feed them carrots like I just want him to be happy and it's like she's trying to explain to him like well you can't feed them right before they perform and he's like it's crazy how they remember all those moves and she's like well technically they're being directed from like it's things like that about like the equestrian form of like it's all and how the writer sits and it's how they move in like Martha was explaining the different, like, parts of the equestrian competition, and I know nothing. I just know I, like, also watching the horses dance. And he was so scared, but he did it. He met the horses.

I, like, I need a social scientist to explain why it is so, such a perfect human combination to have Martha Stewart and Snoop Dog together. Like, I know that this has been happening for years. We've been talking about it for years. they've collaborated for a long time. And Twitter is a lot of people are seeing their collaboration for the first time and is very confused. Everybody keeps joking.

We love an odd couple. Are they kissing? No, they're not kissing. Not kissing. Ever since the play, the odd couple. We've loved an odd couple. And they really truly feel like they should not get along and that, you know, Martha Stewart's Monocle should break every time Snoop Dog is in the vicinity.

But instead, they have a love for each other. but it's also perfect because like Snoop Dog comes from, you know, uh, the crazy like gangster rap, everything, you know, murder was the case, all that stuff. And Martha Stewart, though, she is this highfalutin fancy person. In fact, also went to jail. And Martha Stewart's been in jail. Uh, has Snoop Dogg even been in jail?

Like Martha Stewart is. I don't know, but I don't know if there were other times. If he was ever in, like she went to prison. I don't even think she has. technically she's had a harder situation and that has a bigger record than him. I mean, spending hard time in prison is the real deal. Yes, and people wonder why they get along and it's because they both smoke a lot of weed, and she just, especially them talking about dressage is so perfect because what you don't want to like about Martha Stewart is how pretentious she is, right?

And there is just something about her. explaining it to Snoop Dog. She's not being condescending. No. She's really, it's like, it's, it's like he is like an antidote to the pretentiousness that she might otherwise put out because he's just so authentic. And maybe she's less pretentious than we want to think she, there's just something that's going on there where it's like it truly brings out the most appealing parts of each

of them. And especially her explaining this horse, which I got to be honest with you, I know we've been talking about Drisage on the page. for a decade. But it has never been as interesting to me as it was watching them talk about it. It really, like, because she cares about it so much. It's like just she could really tell you everything,

how they do, oh, this move with the four feet is harder than with the two feet. And how they explain, like, because you're right, they move so effortlessly. These huge horses, do you know how hard that is to teach them how to do, The problem with Dressage is it's a stupid-looking sport. Right. It is done by, in stupid places, but in a stupid realm. So it's very hard to feel that moved by it.

And Martha Stewart explaining Dressage sounds objectively annoying. And then somehow it ends up just being like the highlight of your week. And he's like, he's like, yeah, the driver's doing a good job. I call him the driver. He's just kind of like narrating his own little jokes. I love. listening to him. Talk about anything. They did such a good job of bringing him on as a commentator for the Olympics. Talk about the smartest thing that the Olympics could have done to get everybody

to watch it because not only is it his commentary, but it's also like things like, for instance, his pen, specifically Snoop Dog's pin for the Olympics is a vision of him blowing smoke rings in the form of the Olympic rings. And it's awesome. And it's apparently very, very hard to find. And all of this, which also, we've never talked about on the show before. And I'm going to go ahead and guess. It's because you guys probably don't care.

And I imagine a lot of people don't care. But I'm going to bring it up anyway. Look, both of you look so scared. No, I have an admission to make. If you're talking about collecting pins, I'm a collect. in pin ass bitch bro. Bro. Have we ever told you about my Disney pin collection?

No, I mean, I don't collect anymore, but when I was younger and I actually remember, I believe I got. Oh my God, are we unlocking something right now? We're unlocking a little something because I kind of miss collecting pins. I'm hosting a show with two people who collect pins. You are. Yes. Yes.

But when I was a kid, because I think I even remember it being a big deal getting pins from like the Atlanta games, you know? Yeah. Oh, yeah. This has been since athlete. This is like from like 100, 150 years ago this started. I just mean for me, when I was a kid collecting pins, I remember in like there was a big, it was a big deal for me to like get pins from those games. I had a fisherman's hat.

What do you call those? Bucket hat. The dumb hat, like a Gilligan hat style hat. That's a bucket hat. Oh, you had a bucket hat. I had a bucket hat. That was my bucket hat era. And I covered it in pins.

it was where I put all my mini pens. Oh, you were a kid with a bucket hat. Heavy hat. No, no, no, I wouldn't wear it. It would just hang in my room. But that was just what I, that was just the item I chose to cover in my mini pins. And then anytime my parents would travel anywhere, I would expect a pin of representing the place they went to.

And I also remember the whole pin exchange thing around the Atlanta games. I was like trying to get a hold of any of those pins. Wow. So what Jaggie was going to bring up is that it's a long, same tradition that everybody is like pin crazy like those really nice pins though like the metal really the enamel pins yeah yeah these are the nice enamel pins and so every like like a lot of the bigger art like are i'm going to call them artists whoa body artists yeah that's what i'm calling all of them they each of the body artists have their own the athletes so like Simone byles yeah body artist

Okay, okay, yeah. Human art. Yeah, body artist. Yeah, artist is the body. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hello, Ed Larson and Amber Nelson from the brighter side here to check in with you. See how you're doing. Is your day more disappointing than a gas station sandwich? Are you trying to put one foot in front of the other in a glue factory? Did you try to throw your air fryer in the bathtub, but nothing happened because you were too lazy to plug it in first? Then the brighter side podcast is for you. Oh, yeah! Each week we take nasty, dukey, stupid, dumb.

Stinky, no good, do-do factory. Boo. Caca-like topics and try to find the brighter side. Hey, Amber, what's the brighter side of waking up chained to a bed in Russia? At least they have free health care. That's right. So start your weekend off right every Friday with the brighter side on the last podcast network. You beautiful babies.

So it's different. to get a hold of these pins, so you have to, like, go. But it's a whole part of a whole, like, trading community that's a part of the Olympics, which helps people also get to know other people. It's like a great- It's pogs. It's pogs or friendship bracelets, right? But also, it is what Disney does as well.

And it's someone that was, you know, we were huge Disney family for a very long time. And that is why I am now, don't really give a shit about Disney. but at the time, of course, I loved Disney. But what I loved the most was the enamel pins. And so that's also a big part of Disney culture is getting the Disney pins. You're starting to make me sad. I'm just letting you know, you start making me a little sad, go on? Why am I making you sad?

You just talked about your bucket hat with pins on it, all right? So I'm talking about at least I was interacting with people because I would wear my flare, all right? and I would wear everywhere and then you can go up to anybody that's wearing the wear. I was interested with my mom and my dad when they brought open pins for the many places they would travel to that I would not go to because I would be in my room.

You were not invited. You were a child. It's sad for everybody, okay? Oh yeah, this is all sad. There's nothing sad about this situation. It was nice. I met many nice people and I've got a lot of rare pins and you're all going to see okay, maybe we threw the Beanie Babies in the tracks. But you will see with these enamel pins someday, all right?

Because they have every year they've got specific pins that drop. So you also want to go after all the pins. But I've got some motherfuckin' like OG pins. I just thought that you're either collecting vagina and dick or pins at the Olympics. There's no in between. I thought you meant me in my life. That too. Yes.

Yeah, you're right. Or pins. Yeah, one or the other. either just trying to get as D&P wet as possible or, and or, maybe you're also prolifically. Because I would probably, if I were using my book smarts, I would have had a bunch of pins made that say like, want to suck, want to fuck.

You know what you mean? I'd have those pens made. And then I would present them. You would be kicked out of the Olympics. Yeah, do you want to trade a pen? And if it was someone I was wishing, you know, some kind of intercourse with or, you know, any, some kind of body artist.

You hold out on one hand, do you want to suck? Right. The other hand is do you want to fuck? And then the person just walks away. Sir, that is the drosage horse. Yeah, exactly. I'm like, I'm sorry. I'm all confused.

It's been a topsy, turvy a couple of weeks. You know, how did you get in? They've got thick legs. I'll tell you what. I know. Sometimes. Am I supposed to ignore the horse's calves?

Are we just supposed to act like a horse? They're looking good. Oh my gosh. They've been working out too. The fucking horse who was dancing to queen. That was the moment where I was like, I need to go pull my horse. pull my children out of summer camp to show them this video.

Like they're going to, my kids love hard rock, and they love unicorns, and they're going to love that horse dancing to Queen. Oh, my God. Oh, it's going to be so good. But, but yeah, so there's all these tick. I think that this is a fundamentally different experience of the Olympics right now for many reasons. One is that I think people are deeply starved for joy.

And so that, any joyful thing. And we're actually maybe feeling a little bit of hope for the first time in, four years? Yeah, there's these like... Eight years. 12 years. 37 years. I would say we're feeling a little bit of hope, guys.

There's these like glimmers of hope on the horizon. This is this wonderful... The Olympics are this wonderful collective experience. But then also, of course, there's TikTok. And so it's just like, I guess maybe this has been happening the last two or four years. But I feel like this, the role of TikTok in enjoying the Olympics this year, like seeing... like the U.S. women's gymnastics team like planning their little ticot after they win and seeing Snoop Dog makes TikTok where he's giving the tennis player a pin. And then she makes one where she says, thank you, Snoop Dog.

It feels it's like high school in the best possible way. Like all the best things about high school. Like we're trading. We're planning dances together. We're doing jokes. It's really fun. We're trying to break our unfuckable. beds, but we're going to bend them in half. And also for the people, I understand that they're not

just anti-sex beds. I understand that it's also like to lower the footprint of the Olympics. Like, I get it. I'm calling them anti-sex beds because that's what all of the internet calls them. They're anti-sex beds. But they also, it's good for, it's better for the young brother. I understand. I understand. I get it. But you're right, though, the TikToks are the most fun aspect of watching them all in between all of the games. And I was watching, I was following some, I think she was a rower that was talking about how like, you all think like, oh, just get on Tinder. Oh, just get on Tinder. And apparently Tinder did this huge push trying to be like, there's Olympians on Tinder.

You got to get on Tinder, everybody. So she's like, so I went on Tinder to see how many Olympians there were on Tinder. And I tell you, not the ones you want to bet. And it's like, I bet. I bet the ones that are on the Tinder are not the ones. that you're looking for. And she's like, I am an Olympian. And I still look at these Olympians, go, like, why would I want to bang this person? But I guess somebody wants to bang an Olympian and really wouldn't care regardless. Yeah. No, it's like the article you sent about the people

getting the Olympic rings tattooed on them. And I was like, I would 100% do that even if I was like on the team, but I don't even get to compete. Even if I don't meddle. It's just one of those things where you just say, I went to the Olympics. I'm getting the tattoo. I'm calling myself an Olympian for the rest of my life. But I guess there's probably, I'll bet that there's like high school. There's probably people who are like, well, they're an Olympian, but like they're not really an Olympian. I also want to give shoutouts to Alona. I think her last name is mayor. Marr, I've never said her name or looked up how to say her last name, but she's the, the rugby bitch. Oh, you know exactly what I was talking about. I follow the big,

thick rugby bitch and who apparently her sister coined the phrase girl dinner like she's like known on TikTok. So the two of them making TikToks together is really, really adorable and especially people that are ripping her apart for her BMI. Great. She's a fucking Olympian. That's my favorite part was when she's getting ripped apart for her BMI and she's like, I'm at the Olympics. Are you? I'm an Olympian rugby player. Are you? You're right. Hang your hat on that forever. Not that you should even have to say that. She's pure muscle. What are you talking about? I love her. The women's rugby clips. I had no idea that I love women's rugby. That's been a real outlier. Or like, not an outlier. That's been a real standout of the Olympic games. I think people a lot big talk about. I guess also rugby makes for good TikTok.

clips and I think and stuff like that. So it's kind of changing what we focus on. Isn't that interesting how different types of media intake? You know what I mean? And especially, of course, three girls dancing. That event has been huge this year because of TikTok. I love now everyone's talking about three girls dancing staring at a camera. It is really, really huge.

I'm making fun of TikTok dancing. Oh, I was like, what Olympic sport are you making fun of? I was like, they're not doing. the Olympic, I mean, they do the Olympic trope. Dead-eyed middle school girl dancing competition. You haven't seen that? Or they just do the same dance for two seconds and it always cuts off weird. And you're like, where's the rest of the dance?

Why is it cut off here? I mean, I think it would be great, especially if it was only, they only allowed younger people to do it so that they could be embarrassed by it later on in life. Because again, like, think of how many videos you would have of yourself. Oh, my God. Add that option from back then. She's like, watch me, watch me, watch me, watch me, let me do this, let me do this. I get those ladies. It's like, who gives a fuck?

How many times a day do your kids come up to you and you genuinely don't care about what they're going to show? How many times a day? Well, and even really what you just said really speaks more towards it. She always wants me to film her. I have so many videos of her just jumping up and down on a trampoline for like five seconds and then going, let me see it over and over again. She is.

Oh, my God. The women's gymnastics team is going to, my children live through this summer, like, please, because they watch the gymnastics. And then they're like, I can do that. Right. And they just sent themselves hurling off the couch. And I know that this, I did the same thing when I was a kid. It's part of the proud tradition of being a kid watching the Olympics where you're just like, I can do that. I can do that, I can do that too.

And I'm like, people, you can't, you don't even know how to do a somersault without breaking your neck. You need to stop. Don't do it. And I like, and I honestly, it is, I think it's. Because of TikTok, how much they have to say it now. I'm very surprised in a lot of my Olympic watching of how often they're like, please don't try this home. Right.

Please don't put this on TikTok. These are professionals that work really hard to learn to do this. You can very easily hurt yourself. And they just keep saying it. But what is this? Oh, six-year-old is going to hear that and go, oh, interesting. I shouldn't do that. That's how six-year-olds.

Oh, mother, I like what you are saying. I'm not going to like that I'm teaching you to talk like that. I love the six-year-old character you've created. I think it's a bird. I think that's a bird you're describing. Oh, my God. Is that why an egg came out? Oh, my God.

My daughter's a bird. Coming this Tuesday to NBC. Your mother, a bird. Your mother, a bird. Chinatown reference. I'm trying to talk about the poll of all. with the Big Dong. There's been so many

mini news cycles within the Olympics. Like we, the Algerian boxer stuff is probably out of our jurisdiction. That I just, oh man,

oh, don't even how upset. Solidarity. Solidarity. Not going to get into that. Stupid. Yeah, solidarity. I mean, it's just,

that's just gotten to the point of complete idiocy. What are we even talking about anymore? Even the Italian boxer, there was a bunch of very good memes making fun of the Italian boxer crying about losing,

my favorite of which was, was the picture of her crying in the press conference and the caption was, She eat the best spaghetti. She eat the must be spaghetti. And so much shout out to the wheel of cheese lady, speaking of witch. Oh, I want to talk about the wheel of cheese. We'll talk about the cheese. But going back to what was the other controversy yet?

What were you just saying, MJ? You were just in the middle of days. Big dong. Oh, yeah, no, just that there's some. Big dong! Every day there's like, oh, yeah, what I was saying was just that the Italian boxer after this whole thing with the Elon Musk and everybody weighing in and saying, oh, J.K. Rowling is gliving in black mold and losing her mind.

And then the Italian boxer was like, I'm sorry. I was just really upset because I lost. I admire Amani Khalif and I wish her the best. So it turned out to be a total fucking, just transphobes losing their minds. Side note, the black mold comment. I don't even think Jackie would get that one because that's very Twitter specific. like, JK Rowling's profile picture is her, like, in her bedroom, and you can, it's visible in the background that there's a ton of black mold on her walls. So everybody was like, hey, by the way, I think you have some brain altering black mold.

Yeah. Can we blame that? I'd love to blame that. And she has since changed her profile picture, by the way. So anyways, if you didn't know the Jake and Rowling black mold comment. Yeah, sorry, that was a deep cut. No, no, I love it. One of my favorite revelations.

That's one of my favorite social media things. when someone notices something like that has nothing to do with anything that just somehow, you know, connects. Only when it's used for good, though, because I feel like this, in that instance, it's used for good towards someone that has evil thoughts. I feel like that's fine. Yeah, J.K. Rowling just went on a 24-hour news cycle attacking this person for absolutely no reason. And therefore, a bunch of other people did. How are you guys still on X? I know that you love the mold, joke.

Why are you still on X? I don't know. It gives me an idea, kind of what's going on. But yeah, I'm always one foot out the door with it. I don't know. But it just gives me a basic understanding of maybe what's going on. Although my algorithm has gotten very fishy lately as if some person's trying to manipulate it who owns the company to get certain messages through. Even though they said that was exactly the opposite of what they were going to do when they took over the company.

But regardless, that guy's cock. That guy's dog. Hit that pole. Hit that pole. Man, Anthony Amarotti. All right. I'm looking at you, French poll. Walter because his dick

was too big to get over the pole. I so hope, we're all having a good laugh about it. I really hope that he thinks it's fun. He has not commented on it. This will make you feel better. A fact that was revealed

during my watch-long stream as we were talking about it last night because it's the talk of the town people. I didn't even bring it up. He had already, his knees had already hit the pole. So he was already not, it was already a fail. jump before his dick seemingly grabbed the pole.

You watched it? And it yanked it off of the thing. Because before I watched it, I kept hearing about this, kept here. And I'm like, okay, I bet like his midsection hits it. Like, there's no way. And then you watch it. And it's a cartoonish playback. And I feel bad that like his dick, like, sweat.

And you can see it gets caught and like spams it off into his body. about getting laid. And I was like, oh, no. Talk about getting laid at the Olympics. First of all, he is an attractive guy. And second of all, I mean, everybody's going to want. Okay, it's one thing to be like, I banged an Olympic athlete. It's another thing to be like, I banged the guy whose dick fucking knocked the entire

pole off. It was so big. But he's talking about. I just hope that it turns out to be, like, fun for him. Because, of course, he was like, in the post interview, he was like, so disappointed. He's devastated. Of course he's devastated. And of course you're going to be disappointed.

And I just hope that it turns out to be like, well, because part of me is like, at least everyone's talk about his giant dog. Exactly. It's a nice consolation prize. And I feel a lot better knowing that, like, he was, his knees had already hit the thing. So it wasn't actually his dong that got him, uh, not the gold. But like, so at least it's a nice consolation prize. Like, you're known for having like a giant weaner.

I don't, who doesn't? I mean, I, I'm desperate. for that reputation. You know what I mean? I mean, that would be... Are you ready for it? Yeah, exactly. How would you feel afterwards, though?

I don't know if you saw the follow-up that I sent this morning is the fact that he was offered a $250,000 job from a camsite, an adult entertainment company called Cam Soda, who offered him $250,000 in exchange for a 60-minute cam show. Wow. Cam Soda says, although you didn't bring home the gold medal, you're not. You can still capture the gold from your fans via camsoda. That has to count for something, right? Plus, you won't have those restrictive compression shorts holding you back.

So feel free to let it all out and show the world why you should have your own Olympic competition next time around. Wow. I mean, yes, I hope that this, I just feel like I'm thinking about when I was, if I was younger and more insecure and I had like made a mistake because of my tits, I would be embarrassed. about it, you know, but, but, but, and then the whole world's talking about my tits, you know, but, but I'm telling myself that it's different and that having a big, you know, that he's a grown man and that having a big dong in the eyes of the world is, is probably a good thing. Yeah. Um, but yeah, it's just one of those things. You don't expect that to happen. No, there's the tweet, the tweet, lost the pole vault, won the schlong jump. Yeah. And I think that if you're receiving

Xs like that and, like, if you refer to them as X's now? Do you not say tweets anymore? No, it's Twitter. You don't say X's? I'm not calling the man won't even use the proper name for his child. I'm not calling it X, okay? Hell yeah! I love that, MJ. I never say. I never say. Exactly, I feel the same way.

We call it Twitter, we stand strong. And I will also throw this out there. Billy, do not predator this man, okay? He's a good man. Whoa. So I'm, I'm saying. Yeah, they should reshoot the underwear video with the guy with the big shlon. But I'm sitting up top.

Billy Eilish, I am, we are, the world is scared of you right now because of that one line in that song. And if you come after that big penis man, we're, there's going to be a problem. Billy says Charlie likes boys. And then that man just appears, you know, in. Whoa. And Charlie, you know what, Charlie, I can't, I don't know if I can trust you either, okay, to not try to predator that man. I love it. Yeah. Why don't we just pour a little bit of man sauce on this like, talk about a female-centric. song and space for them. But like if he shows up in the little bays and the bra,

like that, you just see another poll like that's, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, here for it. Yeah, let's fucking add it all in, babe. Love it. I don't know. Yeah, he might, you know,

I agree. Hopefully he's a guy who embraces this kind of thing and doesn't like hate the shit out of it. But I do. I am hopeful because I don't think he needs to like necessarily get it to like camming. But, you know, I think he could spin this. you know what I mean?

Maybe do I think it's a lot to ask for a 60-minute nude tam show. I think that's a lot to ask. 60 minutes is a bit long. That's a lot. That's a lot. I do think that like I'm sure hopefully other opportunities will come from it. Maybe he'll get sponsorships off of it.

And the fact that everyone is talking about him. Hopefully that is good. And also he's 21. I don't know how old like when the cutoff is for Polaro. vaulting, I would assume it's probably not far past 21. But hopefully he'll be able to, that's what we're going to put out good energy. Hopefully he'll be able to come back to the next games. In four years, he'll be in Los Angeles.

We'll get an interview with him and we'll see how it went afterwards. That's definitely what's going to happen, not just us trying desperately to flee Los Angeles when the Olympics comes here. I'm already nervous. I know. I'm already nervous about it. I would say, you know, Also, I mean, I think you can do some things to wrap that thing up a little bit.

I think you could do some things to pack that thing down. Yeah. You know what I mean? You could have tucked. Oh, yeah. Yeah, exactly. I think he needs to talk to the drag race, the drag community in general, to learn some tips. Put it away.

That tip, knock that topple that bowl right off the top. You could maybe swab it in a little bit of cheese. Because, yeah, we are talking about Georgia Villa, the Italian. gymnasts who had the sponsorship with big Parmesan-Rigiano. I love that it's just Parmesan. It's not even a brand. Her sponsor is Parmesan cheese. It's like the region.

The entire list of regions that produce real authentic Parmesan Origino are sponsoring her. It's not a company. It is a cheese. I love it. And, you know, I don't know what it is, but I just love the look of a, giant wheel of Parmesan.

There's something about it. It just makes me... You know it's really good. Yeah, you know it's so good. And you can just like carve it off like little bit by little bit. I've always, oh man, I have so many TikToks because like, of course, Henry and I follow a lot of no-noes on TikTok. And the, I've never been able to have a meal where they put the fresh spaghetti in the big wheel of the all the cheese. And then they like put it around inside of the cheese and they like make the sauce.

and they like make the cheese sauce while just putting it in the cheese and I've watched those TikTok videos so many times and here's the thing I guess I could probably buy a wheel of cheese like I'm never gonna do that when am I ever gonna do that

I gotta like go to Italy to do that and I think those wheels of cheese are like hundreds of dollars Oh yeah well they last How long are they last you? Yeah they last you but they last you the rest of your life You know what I mean? That depends on if you're cooking like a Italian

you're not using that much cheese but if you cook a like an Italian-American, yeah, we're going to cover it in cheese. Honestly, it's like, contrast so much with Jackie also sent the story about what Tom Cruise eats, and it was like the most depressing thing I've ever read in my life.

Oh, shocker, is it fish? It is fish. Slow. And vegetables with nothing on it. Slow. Slow cook. Well, it's because you can inseminate the flounder before it becomes the good white meat.

Thank you for being disgusted by the idea. And all right, I'm sure there's lots of, things you can cook well at low temperature cooking, but he abides by low temperature cooking, which just thinking about... For fish, yeah. Steamed fish with steamed vegetables with nothing on the side at your low cooking. No fat, low seasoning. I don't even know with that.

And you know what? You know what? This Olympic bitch has a giant wheel of cheese. And not only that, she's talking about, yeah, I bring Parmesan or Reggiano for my snacks. I have it with me at all times. And it's the Italian way. And I just, it's like, it's the Italian way.

I always love a story of like the Tom Cruise one because it reminds me of the Mark Wahlberg one. And it just, it absolutely allows me to never have a millisecond of jealousy for these people's careers or riches or anything. Because I would never want to live like either of those people. I mean, Mark Wahlberg up at four in the morning to work out eight times and then have a scheduled 30 minute meeting with his family for quality time. And then over here with Tom Cruise, he only eats one thing every single time he eats. And it's always like, it's just so boring and so bland. And I don't care that it makes you like give you more productivity and better, you know, and put you in better shape than everybody else for your dumb movie career.

I need to eat fun food. I do. I do. What's the point of lit? To me, I read something. I'm like, what is the point of living? It makes me existential. I'm just like I, if I was like that, every time I try.

And I've done this more. It's been a long time as I've done this clearly. But I've done this where I tried to be like super regimented for a little while. And dude, it sucks. You know what I mean? I mean, I can see doing it like. But there's a way to do it. Like I've been living that life but like four days out of the week I live that life.

And then three days you can eat more and eat. Like I feel that there's a way to live a balance where most of the time you eat clean or like or tighter. And I just, I feel like the all or nothing approach is so stark. I just, I don't want to Tony it. What am I, Robert Denny Jr.? Oh, MCU joke. Did you just hear? Nerd girl.

Sorry. Oh, is she the new doctor too? Sorry. I guess I am. Well, all right. I think it's time. I think it's time for share to grace us with her press. Oh, okay.

It's time for the celebrity conspiracy. me with the share. Do you believe it? Did Sam Levinson rip off Euphoria? Oh, interesting. From where? Well, we all know it's based on, I'm not talking about the fact that it is based off of a previously existing show.

We know that. I know. I assume. Right. So I want to establish that. No, it's a whole other element. So it's like all of it was taken.

This one comes in from Catherine, who writes, hi y'all. I thought I saw rumblings online that Sam Levinson stole a lot of creative direction for euphoria from a female artist. and here it is. The linked article is from BuzzFeed News and reads,

director and photographer Petra Collins claims she, quote, created a whole world for euphoria. You can look up, maybe just check out Petra Collins' photography. And you will see a striking resemblance. Sam Levinson allegedly ripped off and people are furious.

Well, when you put in Petra Collins, as I was putting in, it immediately pops up euphoria right afterwards, which means this is a big spiracy here, y'all. Petra reportedly claimed that she worked on Euphoria for about five months before being dropped by HBO for being, quote, too young and was left in tears when she saw an exact copy of her work produced by Sam a year later. She claims the Sam hit her up, inspired by her photography for the show. By the way,

she directed Olivia Rodriguez music videos for Good for You, Brutal, and Vampire. Wow. And more from the interview, she said, I moved to L.A. and worked for HBO for about five months. I was like, I'm directing the show. I created a whole world for it, did the cast. whatever. And at the last minute, HBO was like, we are not hiring you because you were too young. She continued a year later, I walked out of my apartment and saw this billboard for Euphoria, and it's exactly a copy of my work. I started crying. I was so shocked. I mean, it happens to me so many times in my career, but not on a scale like that. And if you remember Idol, there was a female director for the Idol and Sam Levinson ended up swooping in and taking over

that job. Yes. Yes. Catherine also writes, I'm hearing you trying to rectify the cognitive dissonance of how the same person created euphoria and idol. Yeah, it turns out he stole the best elements, in my opinion, of euphoria from a woman. So there you go. Also, by the way, look up if you're not familiar with their work. Petra Collins makes some great work. Wow. I love those music videos, too.

Yeah, me too. Good for you. It's awesome. Yeah, like the entire aesthetic of Petra Collins' work is euphoria. Yes. Yeah. Whoa. completely.

Isn't that crazy? Wow. That is crazy. This is crazy. Because I think that's one of the most striking things about the show is like the the color, the pop, the unique like look in a very like cinematography way. That's my smart way of talking about shows in a very cinematography way. So yeah, it definitely, yeah, it's definitely some interesting stuff going on here.

I'm interested to see whatever Sam Levinson does next, I'm very curious about like outside of Euphoria. season three. Like, I'm just very curious about this. Right. Did he strike gold once? Like, basically, sometimes you got, you got enough talent to make something really good

and then not keep making really good things. And that's okay. Or is it all smoking mirrors and stolen work from women? I don't know. I mean, I will say, to his credit, season two is also good. Right. So, like, if only season one was good and we thought season two took a huge dip,

I'd feel as her way there were also those like... Malcolm and Marie, which was that, like, indie movie that he did with John David Washington and Zendaya. And that was like another like intimate thing that I think that he also wrote. But Lord knows at this point, or didn't steal it from someone else. I don't know. Maybe we don't trust.

And those one-off euphoria specials were really strong as well. Those were really strong. But again, is that him? Yeah, I'm not trying to sit here and like totally say like he's a fraud. But very interesting. I did not know about this, this whole thing with, what's her name with I already forgot

now I'm losing it on her Petra Collins yeah but I'm interested to see more from her I hope she can you know make films and stuff I think those music videos are great and I love her aesthetic

and her photography is really cool I mean it's not even do we believe it's just this is obviously a fact right like this is I mean there's no way this didn't happen and if you didn't necessarily like steal from her yeah I mean You definitely didn't get rid of everything she added to the show, which is bullshit.

Yeah. That is like that should not be allowed. And it's so ridiculous that there's no way that while you're working on a project, I mean, unless it's like obviously already stated in contracts, that's why when you're starting a new project to anyone, you have to get everything in writing, have it all written down. But Lord knows how ironclad HBO is. Yeah, but this seems like very cut. dry. Like a woman artist is saying, I used to work for you and then you fired me and now you made the show with all of my ideas. Look at my work. You see how much this is my work? Like, yeah, I believe. Lentless to say, I believe. I believe. And so everybody, look up Petra Collins.

We'll follow Petra Collins and just give them the accolades they deserve. Ooh, and make a chapel music video. Oh my God, please. If you're already working with Olivia Rodriguez, that's pretty easy one-to-one. I saw a tweet that had a picture of Tim Walts, the new VP candidate, and Chapel Rhone, and it said two Midwest Queens. So, love it. Very happy about that. I saw that as well. But again, MJ showed us the mugshot from Tim Walts for many, many years ago, and he looks like the cutest.

I just want to boop him on his little nose. Just a little cutie-patutie who got a DUI and never drink again. Never drink again. 30 years, baby. Don't we love that for him? Good for him. Hell yeah. But now it's time for the list.

Get out of here, Tim Walts. Oh, who's on the list? Me Jackie. Gotta have that list. Time celebs acted really privileged, spoiled, or demanding. You know, I think that we've been feeling too connected to these celebrities recently. Yeah, we've had a lot of goodwill this episode, a lot of positivity. Yeah.

Yeah, don't worry. We're starting it off with the Kardashians. In 2024, I remember talking about this. Christiane Ui, aka Chef K, the Kardashian-Gener's longtime private chef, told page 6 that sometimes before she can go home after a 21-hour shift, they'll ask her to make a grilled cheese. Oh, my God. Do you remember that video of one of the Kardashians trying to cut cucumber up? Oh, my God, with the butter knife and they just don't know.

But like 21-hour shifts. She said sometimes they're like, oh, chef, you've been here for 21 hours, but can you whip up another late night snack. Actually, I just started making that for them throughout the holidays, just the last minute thing. I can't imagine being at the whim, the beck and call of someone with that kind of money.

I think, I can't imagine it. You know that if the chef is not there, they don't know how to eat. Yeah, that's the thing. They would not know how to make the simplest thing to make. And I will even say Lexi's cousins were in town and they wanted a snack and they grilled cheese or whatever.

And I was watching them. And I was like, I was like, oh, I've actually technically never made a grilled cheese before. And I googled it and learned how to do it in two seconds. They tried to make fun to me, too. They were like, you know how to make a grilled cheese? I'm like, I'm making one right now. I'm even putting mayo on it because they say that makes the bread like crisper.

It does. I'm even like doing it special. Like, what do you mean? It takes two seconds. It's incredibly enjoyable and easy thing to make in your kid. I could imagine having such a nice fucking kitchen and not learning how to do anything in it. Like it's just enjoyable to cook sometimes for yourself. I mean, I love cooking, but...

So stupid. Yeah. Honestly, you guys saying this, I immediately jumped down to when Cher was hanging out with Kathy Griffin, the comedian got hungry and suggested they order pizza. Share jokingly replied, how do you order a pizza? I'm Cher. I don't know how to order a fucking pizza. Kathy, however, also did it know how to order a pizza.

Oh, my God. This actually makes me feel bad for them. They don't know how to order a pizza. You don't know the pleasure of being like, it's one in the morning. I'm going to make a grilled cheese. You don't know the pleasure of being like, you know what, let's get a pizza. You know, like, what a loss. What a sad life.

I think when you live life too, that's that calorically restricted and have to know what you're eating and what you put in your body that like those kind of last minute things just don't happen. And that, like when I first moved to Los Angeles, I couldn't believe that almost not like, very, like, very. Very few things are open past 9 p.m. And I was like, I was so used to New York. I was like, but I eat a bodega sandwich and an order of mott sticks every night at 3 o'clock in the morning when I get home from the bar. What am I supposed to do? It's like, oh, you're supposed to change your whole life and not live off anymore. That's what you're supposed to do.

Or you could just get a bunch of people to pick you up, I guess, because of the 2022 Kentucky Derby, Jack Harlow didn't want to get his shoes dirty. So he had a pair of men who seemed to be his security guards carry him over the track. Why'd you have to go down to the track if you didn't want to dirty up your shoes? Why'd you do this? I will say, Liss they're smiling. They're smiling while it's happening. They're having a laugh about it at least. He's not just stu-faced like getting carried across the book.

That is true. That's true. It's very, it is a very cute. The people carrying him are smiling. Yeah. And he's smiling. I think he is such a cutie patootie. I don't know enough about him, but I am deeply charmed by him.

And the only off-putting thing about him is that he is Chet Hanks' example for White Boy Summer. But I don't know. He works with a little Naz-X and he's a cutie-patunia night. And he's fast-class. When that song was in, I never actually listened to it, but all I would sing to myself was, Last glass. In 2022, Kendall Jenner and Haley Bieber were photographed illegally taking the accessible parking spots outside their Pilates studio so they could be close to the door. To be fair, their security guards reportedly moved their cars after the models got inside and put the cars back after the class had ended so that they could easily get.

get out of their car. So you want to be like, oh, it's so they don't get paparups. So they don't get photograph. I guess. But also like, is it? Who's, yeah. I'm sorry to be mean here, but are the, are the Papps chasing Haley Bieber? I guess they are. I guess they are. I guess they are. But still, like, don't take the accessible spots. Yeah. Don't take this. You can park literally anywhere else. Like a friend of ours who is in a wheelchair consistently talks about, like, you don't think about how difficult it is for people to get anywhere. So how dare you take up a spot? So just think about it before you fucking do it. Yeah. Please don't do it. Yeah. Taking it. Taking the accessible spots is one of those on the short list of just really never do it. Yeah. Of course you needed. I mean,

I'm not saying. Sure. Of course. For everybody else. Anyway, 2013, Lady Gaga was sued by her former friend turned assistant, which you should never do, Jennifer O'Neill, who alleged that while on tour, she wasn't allowed to have her own hotel room and often had to share a bed with the singer in case she needed something in the night. Jennifer also testified that if Lady Gaga grew tired of the movie she was watching in the middle of the night, she'd wake her up to change the DVD. There was a whole lawsuit. This list. Why not just get a suite so that they're just in the other room? Why would they have to share a bet?

Well, I guess maybe if Lady Gaga was having one of those nights where she was in a ton of pain. Right. Because that was one of her big things, right, is that she has this horrible pain problem. Oh, really? So, I mean, if it's that, then, you know, it's, but it is very, the cheering the bad things, maybe a little bit of a boundary that, you know, it's like, why can't you just get her a cot or something? When you have that much money. Or like a dog dish or something.

You just hire a night nurse for yourself, right? Like, that's, you know, if you need somebody to be there at night, again, it's the same with the chef. Like, if you can't make yourself a grilled cheese, hire another chef. Right. Don't make one person work 21 hours. Work 21 hours. There's no need for it. You've got the money.

Don't make this person sleep in your bed. If she's also working for you during the day, give her some time off. Hire a night nurse. Right. Sleep in bed with you, you know. I don't know. Or a duel. These celebrities need doulas.

Yeah, post-partisan. No, they think about it. They need doulas. They need full-on baby people. Yes. To take care. Like a patient person who's like, yes, it is hard. that should be paid a lot of money to do it.

You've got it. You may as well. Now, this is the thing to do. This is more on set. And I remember this. And I just always love it about Daniel Day Lewis. When playing Christy Brown, an artist who had cerebral palsy and could only move one foot, in my left foot, Daniel Day Lewis took the method acting route.

He reportedly required crew members to lift him, spood feed him, and push him. and push him around in a wheelchair he did not need. Apparently spending weeks using a wheelchair that he again did not need reportedly caused damage to two of his ribs as well. This was one of my left foot was one of the first Daniel Day Lewis movies that I ever saw, and I, like, loved it. And it is one of those ones where you look back and you're like, well, we could have done a couple of things differently with that one.

But, yeah, that's me. You know, I don't know, it's not that, ooh, that acting. Oh, baby, when they feel like we've got to do it for my aunt. No, we would not do that again. And finally, in 2003, Bono forgot his favorite Trilby hat when he traveled from London to Modena for a charity concert. So he reportedly spent around $1,500 to have it flown to him. He reportedly spent $150 on the hat's taxi ride to the airport,

$663 for it to ride. in the plane's cockpit, so it wouldn't get crushed by other people, $225 on its taxi fare to him, and an additional $300 in tips and insurance. I think of tips probably should have been more than $300. If you're supposed to defend a hat with your life, to some extent, that's a lot of money. Yeah, $300 for a $300 tip for a $1,500 cost, you're just giving a 20% tip for flying a half. internationally. But that's Bono for you.

That's Bono for you. And they are privileged. The celebs they ate like us. These bitches. Wow, this list really destroyed all the good ones. Really deflated my bubble. Oh, yeah,

that's what I'm here for. Share doesn't know how to order a pizza. But, you know, we're sad for her because of it. You know who all that knows how to order a pizza? Just like I feel bad for Mark Wahlberg and Tom Cruise for their dumb regiment to have it.

fucking pizza. Yeah, exactly. But Snoop is exactly. That's why we love, that's what we love Snoop Dog. You know, he's not regimented. He indulges in the finer things in life. And I'm probably sure he probably has an order to pizza in 40 years. But he could probably pick up the phone and charm. Think of your something out. Living daylights out of those, that pizza parlor too. Think you're something out. Snoops on the phone. Yeah, yeah. Imagine I'd flip out. I don't know what I would do. I'd make the best pizza of my fucking life. He's also, relatable, I will also say, because if anything, he wouldn't be able to order a pizza because he'd be too scared because he was so high. Right. Which is something we've all been through before,

you know? Yes. Of course. That's a very normal. That's a relatable feeling. Not wanting to talk on the phone. He forgets. Like, I remember, remember the days I, like, when I would smoke weed, I'd get so nervous to call in an order that I'd write it all down so I could see it. Yeah. I mean, the whole thing and just being so afraid and yet so excited for that knock on the door. Oh yeah. Because You knew you were going to have to interact with the human being, but then you knew afterwards you would enjoy a fucking whole ass pizza very high. Yeah. The best.

Worth it. All right. Well, I can't see. Oh, no. I think I'm going. Blind. Items. Ah, we can't see them.

Wow, guys, crazy that it happens every week. Every week. It's scary. You should go to a doctor. I should. I should. Despite the noise and the large numbers of people, this former A-list singer fell asleep.

in church last night. Former and his Cameron Bray. I hope it's called. This was such a dumb one. I just had to put it in. No, no, no. Literally who else would I even know that goes to church?

I mean, you could argue he's still A list. Oh, the Beebbs. Justin Beebbs. He goes to church. They went to church together on Wednesday night. He was wearing giant bedtime slippers. They were like Gucci.

Like if you, you know what I mean? Like giant bunny slippers, but they weren't bunny. they were just giant fluffy, I'm about to go to sleep slippers. So that might not help you stay awake at church. I don't understand that. Like, Haley Bieber's dress like nice for church

and Justice's wearing like shorts and literally like huge, I'm about to go to sleep slippers. So it feels like he dressed for a slumber when he went. It's so crazy. That's what young, fashionable people wear. They wear their PJs. It is crazy.

It's also the really rich. I feel like the really rich you either dress, real well and you're looking real good or you can dress as down as you want no matter where you are and usually it's like oh that black person probably has the most money of anyone I could ever imagine when they're looking like the dingiest at no boo yeah I am putting this link of him and his slippers in the chat though okay you saw it yeah it's so sweet I meant to put I have the link on hand for you guys thank you look at these things oh my god with the bucket hat with a

with the huge, oh my God, the Bob Marley's shirt. I don't know. Jesus Christ. Yeah, the Louis Vuitton booties. Oh my God. It's an interesting get up for a church service. I will say, I'm not too stuck up. I don't think you need to dress necessarily to the nines to be a church.

But this is an interesting approach to an attire for a church. Yeah, the Bob Marley's smoking a jay with the bucket hat, the knit bucket hat, the big slippers and the unzipped hoodie. This looks like how I would roll to church if I was forced to go. I'd be like, all right, I'll be there, but I ain't gonna fucking try. But I'm gonna wear it. He's like holding his shorts up. I don't think he forgot to put a belt on.

No belt on. But he is a Christian. Oh yeah. I don't think it's his wife dragging him to church. No, no, it's not. No, they love God. They love God. All right.

Next up, this married A-list actress who will have an Egot by the time her career is finished was all over a guy who was not her husband while out of the country. enjoying the big sporting event. Olympics? I have a clue that'll give it away immediately, but I'm going to give you guys a second. Not her heart. She has sung in a movie before.

She, the Jackie loves. Adel Dazine. Flirting feels good in a place like this. Oh, no way. She says their love is eternal. Every time she talks about her love, she says it's eternal. This blood out of saying divorce.

She's still married to Keith Urban. This one, this blood out of saying divorce is, on the dockets. Wow. Oh my God. Speaking of divorced, we didn't even talk about Ben Afflex.

We did not talk about Ben Afflex's hair. Oh, God. Ben Affleck's hair, honey. What? I love it. Punk rock, baby.

You got to go through your punk rock phase if you're getting out of marriage with Jennifer Lopez. We've all been there. We get that. The most divorced dad

of us all. The most divorced dad. I love it, dude. In Ben Affleck, look at this picture. He's got the Moto jacket on. He's got,

I believe it's a red hot chili pepper shirt on. Yes. That is red a chili pepper shirt. It's the hair that's screaming, I'm making a change. Yes. More than anything. And, you know, it's the opposite of the alpaca, I would say.

Yeah. It looks like the hair has been sucked into his brain, but not in a good way. It looks a little bit. This is unfortunate. My brother and I talk about this all the time because I, this is a haircut that if a queer person has it, it looks really cool. Yes. But if a white man has it, it looks really fash. So, like, my brother's always like, I can't get the same haircut as me because, like,

on you, it looks cool, but on me, it looks scary. And, like, I think that that's a little bit of what's going on. It's like a little bit Richard Spencer. That's not really important. I love it. He's wearing a jacket from Back to the Future Part 2. Yeah, yeah. You know, he's just, he's living.

It's a cool queer haircut on Ben Affleck. I think he's, like, being, you know, 16-year-old him. And I support it, you know. I support it. It is very, and like, because everything, it's like, we're not even talking about it to a point. And I think that this is hopefully what they were trying to get to. They're definitely getting a divorce. Oh, yeah. And everything, like, all, everything is going through the motions. They're just not publicly saying anything. And you know what? They don't have to. Yeah. Who knows what's going on, like, behind the scenes between them and what things they can and cannot discuss, I'm sure. Right. And who knows? Before we move on from two-time and Keith Urban, who, was Nicole Kidman Suckina. Do we know? Don't know. Just was all over a guy.

Ooh, I want them to divorce. I just imagine her hands. Like, remember how she clapped to protect the rings? I feel like she still holds her hands out like that to protect whatever she's wearing, even if just touching a person. Okay, here's my guess. Or when she's doing a hand job, she's got her fingers out like that. Yes. Here, my God.

Here is my guess. Okay. Big Cock Pole Vault. Big Cock Pole Vault. That's all I have to say. What if it's that? Govah. Govah!

Would you like to come up to my room? It's either that or all of Gojira, the metal band that performed in the opening ceremony. She's like, fucking feels good in a place life. Whoa. That would be amazing. I know you just thought she just showed up, but that was me.

I just- Jackie. I just need her to be married to someone hotter than Keith Urban. I'm sorry. If we love him, I'm sorry. But I just need it to be, I need her to have like a milth renaissance. Right.

I hear that. Last... I just wanted to be happy. I guess. I just wanted to be happy. I mean, either way. I mean, whatever. I mean, but if they're unhappy,

then great artist created. So I don't know what I want anymore. You know what I mean? Right. Body artists. For the first time in her life, this illiterate A-list actress went to this hotel slash bar-shaust restaurant

and didn't have an alcoholic drink. Good for her. All right. Good for her. She's known as a lush and a disaster. And I will say they went to, oh, God, I didn't put the name of the hotel,

the famous one in L.A. The rose of the one. The one where Brittany had a belt down? Yes, that one. Oh, God, the Chateau. Chateau, yes. Marmont. Yes, she was there.

So she was at Chateau. Okay. A literate, she's a lush. We've known her for being a mess for the longest time. That's why this is Al Blinzee-Lohan. Yes, that's why this is a blind. Wow.

She went to the Chateau-M-A-Mar with her husband, Bader, Shamis, and enjoyed a date night there recently, and apparently she didn't have a drink for the first time ever. Good for her! Didn't she just have a baby? Word on the street is she's doing well. Yeah, she did biologically have a child, or at least it seems, I think. Always got to throw it out there, abortion farms, fiancé, abortion farms.

I'm looking at you, not abortion, uterus farms. Uterous farms, yeah. I'm sorry, I've said the wrong thing. Abortion farms are the future that Democrats want. Yes. Apparently. It's like an RNC talking point. Oh my God.

They're going to use what I just said as a clip and be like, it was said on one of those liberal podcasts. They do it three years old. They do it. Three years old, they kill the kid. They do it in three. Kill the kid right after they're born. They shoot dynamite at it. This is how they do it.

They shoot, they have a dynamite gun, I believe, that they shoot at the child. You know what, good for her. I was trying to talk to a mom on the playground recently, and I said they were... How'd that go? Well, yeah, I'm always saying inappropriate, making bad choices every time. But yeah, we were talking about something Lindsay Lohan came up, and I was like, no, she's like, we're rooting for her now. She made a Netflix Christmas movie, and ever since then, we're rooting for her. And the mom was...

We're rooting for her now. Shocked. I said, no, she's good again. And it turns out we were all wrong for pointing and laughing at her so much while she was, you was young. They just shot Freaky Friday, too. Like, she's, I think that we are about to watch, can you imagine from the beginning of where Lindsay Lohan was when we started page seven? Yeah. If we watch a full O'Hanissance happen in front of us and then all of a sudden she's back on top, that will be insane. I want it for her. I want it for Brittany and I want it for Amanda Binds.

Yeah, dude. The three like women who were our age who got absolutely raked through the coals. And Paris is already killed. it. And Paris, yeah, the Paris Assants is well underway. Oh, yes. And I can see again. Wow, he can see again. Welcome back, Holden.

But now it's time to say goodbye to all our company. MJ. Oh. In the moon. Wow. I was doing the Mickey thing. Goods. You have to see you real soon.

Holden. Brain games. are now over. Why? Because we like you. J-A-C-K-I-E. Thank you guys for both ruining the Mickey Mouse reference I was trying to do. Shit the bed.

But we got two other amazing references in there so that you really did. Don't get the one Mickey Mouse. You're right. You're right. You know, and I appreciate you guys. And I love you both. And thank you guys so much for hanging out with us on today's episode of page seven. My name is Jackie Zabrowski.

can follow me on Instagram over at Jack That Worm and come hang out with MJ and I will actually over the next couple of weeks, it's just going to be me. So if you want to come hang out with a solo Jackie and find out how much she's going to make her Sims woo-hoo while MJ is not around, the answer is a lot. So come hang out with me, Twitch.com. T.T.V. forward slash, oh, no, it's Jackie. I do it Wednesday mornings with MJ, but I've been doing it solo, a couple other times a week, too, so come check me out. Well, I'll be doing Friday's duo with Jackie on Twitch. dot TV forward slash holdenators ho.

Check us out over there every Friday, 6 p.m. EST for Jack and with the Holdies. It's always a good time. I'm streaming on Twitch on Twitch in general. So check me out, Twitch. dot TV, forward slash holdenators ho. Patreon.com forward slash page seven podcast, weekly bonus episodes, Jackie's Book Club, as well as the leftovers.

We'll talk about some of the articles we didn't get to today. also at the $10 layer, the Buffy Watch Long, we are ripping through season two, and it has been going swimmingly. So check that out as well. Patreon.com forward slash page 7 podcast. Please send your conspiracies in to page 7 podcast at gbell.com. Again, that's page 7 podcast at gmail.com.

And nummy, nummy, numby, numby, numby, numby, numby. I love those conspiracy theories that just end. MJ? My name is MJ, and I'm MJKL Kat on Instagram. To the song, everybody. Shout, shout, let it all out These are the emails that you wrote it about Come on, we're gonna read it to you, come on

Shoutouts, shout outs, it's the shoutouts time Yes, and you can send in your own shoutouts To page 7 podcast at gmail.com We absolutely love hearing from you And just thank you so much for your TV wrecks for your support, just anything. And especially, you know, I love pictures of your fur babies and other kind of, you know, feather babies.

If you've got feather babies, if you've got weep, weat, weat, babies just like chapel, I'm always down to see a picture. And I want to say thank you again. The email is page 7 podcast at gmail.com. And, ooh, I love sending love out to you guys. our first shoutout comes in from Leah. Leah says I have really loved watching the recordings of the Sins of Our Lives. Thanks, Leah.

Parenthood, ADHD, and other responsibilities have prevented me from catching a live stream, but I'm hopeful that one day I'll make it and be able to experience the rapture of watching an amorous werewolf woo-hoo with Kelly from Milf Manor. God, we love the Sims. What I've enjoyed most about these recordings is completely excellent. but I've really related to MJ's insights on parenting and hearing about their ravenous consumption of parenting related content. My eye also lingers on all the parenting advice, but applying it is always another story. Leah, I can only imagine. Leah says hearing MJ explain

similar struggles with helping their kids to regulate their emotions and tolerate their frustrations and blah, blah, blah, really helped put things in perspective for me. me and showed me that other people I admire struggle too. Podcast hosts, they're just like us. I would love an LPN parenting podcast that takes an LPN spin on parenting. I'm sure I'm not alone in this. And MJ, if you want to co-host, hit me up. I'm great at talking.

The parenting stuff is a work in progress, which I hear Leah is the name of the game. And as long as you're always working on yourself and doing your best, I know you're going to succeed, but I'm sure there are just those times, and I know you don't want to hear it from me, Leah, but I'm sure there are many, many times where you struggle and be like, why did I act this way? But it's because you're human, Leah, and you're doing the best you can as often as you can. And that's all we can ask for from ourselves. Sending you and your whole family so much love, and MJ read the email and appreciates everything that you passed on. And thank you for taking that from the Sims of our lives. Throughout the ups and downs of our woo-hoo journeys,

we also talk about life. And thanks so much, Leah, for hanging out with us, even if it's not in real time. I love that you're there anyway. Next shout-out goes out to Morgan. Morgan says, hey y'all, all the way from Kentucky. I've been listening to the podcast for years, and I love you all so much.

I put in my two-week notice today, my job where I've worked for eight years. I have created great friendships and memories, but it was time for me to throw in the towel due to such a toxic environment. Morgan, good for you. It's so difficult to do that. God, it's so hard and I'm so proud of you. I've never done anything so bold in my life. I'm typically a person who works hard and keeps their head down and thrives on a routine. I've worked my way to five promotions. Wow. And I'm currently the highest ranked person at my facility. I can endure a lot, but I had a breaking point when my integrity was in question. Jackie, Holden, and MJ, you all have on so many occasions been the only sorts of feeling like I was

socializing due to working so many hours. So I thank you all so much for that. And thank you, Morgan, for listening. You all have been a part of my routine for so long, and that will never change. Change is hard, but I took the leap into the unknown today. I'm not sure what the future holds for me, but I'll land on my feet just like a cat. Hell, yes, Morgan. I should know I have to, and they are about to get so many more snuggles. This is all exciting and terrifying at the same time. Please send me good vibes as I write this new chapter in my book.

Love Morgan's sending you so much love. You got this shit. Oh my God, I'm so proud of you. It's so difficult to get yourself out of situation. situations like that, and it's so hard to advocate for yourself, and you did. And right now, hopefully, you are currently inspiring other people to do the same thing. Thank you so much, Morgan, for writing it, and I'm sending you so much love. And our next shout out is coming in from Mo. Thank you so much, Mo, thank you for your shout out. Mo says, I've always wanted to write in a

shout out, and I'm ecstatic about what I'm submitting now. For years I made myself miserable trying to be successful in the animation industry. It's a highly competitive environment full of exploitation, impossible deadlines, and excruciating disappointment. Oh, I hear you, Mo, I know a thing or two about that. With great heartache, I finally left animation behind for good during the pandemic and started focusing on my own creative projects. It was scary taking a more uncertain path, and there were plenty of bumps along the way. But I finally feel like I'm living the life I want. Now I self-publish my independent comics, teach printmaking workshops at a queer-driven art studio.

Shout out to Nova Community Arts in Los Angeles. Hell yeah, shout out, Nova Community Arts. And sell my prints in artist alleys at conventions. This past weekend, I sold my art at Mid-Summer Scream. That's awesome. Jeff was there, too, one of the world's biggest horror conventions for the first time. It felt like a 180 from where I was only a few years. Wait a second.

It's Mo! It's Mo! that I met! I didn't even realize! Oh, my God, Mo! Hi! Sorry, you're about to talk about this, and I did not read through these shoutouts first. And this is awesome, Mo.

Oh, my God. I didn't realize that was your first midsummer scream. Oh, my God. Sorry, I'll continue to read your shoutout. It felt like a 180 from where I was only a few years ago and meeting other people in these spaces reminds me of how much happier I am now. One of the interactions I had at this show

Amplified how meaningful this change has been for me. A couple rocking the most divine glittery eye shadow I've ever witnessed stop by my table and complimented my work. They were both incredibly kind, and the man who spotted my table across the crowd of people even purchased one of my prints. We spoke for a bit, and he mentioned he was vending at the event too, so I said I'd stop by his table.

I introduced myself, and he told me his name was Jeff. His partner that told me her name was Jackie. Suddenly, thanks, clicked I couldn't help blurting out Jackie Zabrowski. Indeed, it was the podcast. I got an hot dog ambassador. We all know it love, hi, Mo. I unexpectedly met a host of one of my most meaningful parisocial relationships. Oh, and she and Sweet Jeff were there during a pivotal moment of my creative journey.

Of course, I had to mention how much I love page seven, especially since my work is often made while listening and laughing along to the show. and that I'd always wanted to have something to write in and shout out about. So here is that shout out. Oh my God, I'm immediately pulling up your Instagram so I can shout you out. Mo McMasters, and I'm sorry, Mo, you didn't say it in your shout out, but I need everyone hopefully to follow you, Mo McMasters, because they make amazing artwork. And now I've got a print of yours up in my living room. And I got to say, Mo, we have some really sick artwork.

and your artwork stands out amongst them because what an amazing visual artist you are. Sorry, I'll continue reading your shoutout, but I just wanted, hopefully people should follow Moe McMasters, please. It's MCB, by the way, Mo McMasters. Anyway, all right, now I'm jumping back into your shoutout. Shout out to myself for accomplishing a huge event milestone. I feel grateful that I can support myself with my art, delighted by how lovely my fellow horror heads are and inspired by all of the other incredible artists I'm in the community with.

I also want to give a monumental shout out to Jeff and Jackie for supporting other creatives and letting them know they can forge their own path. Hell yes! And of course, I got a shout out crude ink. Thank you so much, where I was able to grab the last of Jeff's sick clown mask paintings to proudly display in my unhinged clown-centric art studio. I'd be remiss if I didn't sing my praises for the whole page 7 crew too. MJ, you are a gender outlawed dream. As a fellow non-binary hunk, it is incredibly inspiring being able

to hear from someone living as their authentic self while raising a family. Both you and Jackie give me hope about what being a queer adult can look like. That makes me so happy, Mo! Hold it even though I'm not a Swifty, I value your unabashed love for your girl.

I grew up as an insufferable music snob, and I'm now proud to be in the top 1% of listeners for Charlie XXX. We all need to be reminded that the ecstasy of pop music is not just for the youths. So please know that your love for

Tay is a beacon, and you're helping me undo years of hipster psychic damage. Thank you for the joy you all foster and mad love to the whole team for bringing it to us twice a week now. Y'all rule. And so do you, Mo! Look up Mo McMasters

on Instagram and check out their awesome fucking artwork. And thank you guys so much. Oh, it makes me feel so full. It makes me feel so happy. And I love our community so much. Thank you guys for being, I'm going to say it, best damn community

on the damn internet, all right? Between here and our Twitch chat, it's absolutely unbelievable. More and more, the amazing people we meet. And that dumb, idiot celebrity gossip brings us together. Who knew that that's where it would start from?

I love you guys. I hope you're in a good headspace this week. And if you're not right now, it's going to get better. Mercury's in bitcher grade, all right? Don't let it affect your brain. We must fight against it. It's Leo season, damn it! Love you guys.

Too much for the end of the episode? Anyway, love you. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors, you can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, Go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.