Page 7 - Ep. 560: Escapesgiving

Episode Date: November 21, 2024

This week on Page 7, MJ confirms to King Lord Holden and Jackie that Golden Bachelorette always opens on sad weeping men, Jackie thanks those who recommended the upcoming "Later Daters", MJ and Holden defend themselves against the lies spread about them regarding Sea Shanties, Holden threatens to X-POZE Jackie on not feelin' Thanksgiving this year and attempt to fix it, Jackie will be offering her account ohnoitsjackie up to the Ban Gods on twitch  to host this years Macy's Parade stream (6am pst/9am est!) cause of Holdens strike for the Oscars stream and MJ will be droppin' by, so it's that time of year to get 3 RumChunkas deep before lunch! Holden speaks to having a very sad day to have a birthday much like the former 3rd host of P7, Martha Stewart want's to have a different documentary made (despite the fact everyone seems to love this one), and channels her documentary rage into takin' down Miss Piggy in a fit of icy anger, Chicken Shop Date also did a very sweet and entertaining Muppets episode with Elmo, Ariana Grande and Cynthia Erivo seem like they are so done with the Wicked press tour and can't be excited for Part II's rollout next year, and Dax Shepard isn't helping with his questions like "HOW DO YOU WIPE YOUR ASS?". In Celebrity Conspiracy Corner: Is Lorde Actually A Bird? Part II, and on The List: times costars working relationships were so fraught that they reportedly did not want to appear on camera together, Blindz, and SHOUT OUTZ!  Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast  Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The mansion men, the golden season, mansion men, we're here to win the heart of Joan. We come from everywhere, we still have love, we want to share, we're tired of being alone. We have so much to offer, we hope that Joan can see that each little thing we tell her is meant to have her fall in love with me. We point to ourselves. With me, and we all point ourselves. We are the mansion men, the golden season mansion men from us to you. Good night. I understand.

But or I guess good morning. Welcome to page seven. I guess it depends on when you're listening to this. Maybe good night to you right now because we are the mansion men. We're the golden season mansion men. And I hope you understand, MJ. I understand. It's from the golden bachelorette.

There must have been a, listen, I tried. Once again, I tried. And Holden's right. Every episode starts with the sound of crying. With sound weeping. Yeah. I'm sorry. This isn't talking TV.

I'm sorry. I know. We're going to talk about it over there. It's a cultural phenomenon. I think that Golden Bachelorette is unfortunately or fortunately, depending on how you look at it, here to stay. Yeah, here to stay. Yes. Oh, it is here to say.

You, I found it, I think, at the end of leftovers last week, that there is a show. And I want to say thank you to so much to anyone that wrote in telling me about later daters, which is another old people reality dating show. that comes out next week. Next week. Yes, I will be watching it. So stay tuned. Let's see if Jackie cries through every episode. You are taking that one.

I'm retiring from old people dating shows. I did get all the way through. Michelle Obama produced it, you fuck. Wow. You know, she's got to keep herself busy after everything that's happened. That's great. You've got nothing else to do right now. Certainly no jobs in the government.

Even in the song you just sang, what was the line about them? They don't want to be alone. I mean, even the song, which is terrible, by the way. This song is not terrible. Kim did a wonderful job. Oh, my God, it's so bad. It is the most droning just un, because he's like a Navy ship captain or whatever. It's the most like military, boring, terrible song.

He tried. We are the magic, man. So anyways, if you don't have to see the show, he tries to get this blueser guy, tries to convince everybody in the house to sing a song with. He's just not as emotionally free as the others, okay? If the song was good, they probably all would have done it with them, but he started singing it to them and explaining it. This is good to men that age, though, is the, you know, like songs that sound like songs that they sing on a Navy boat are what the 65 plus demographic wants to sing. He's a seaman.

Because that's the only acceptable song you can sing, you know? That's the only songs their dad's ever sing. So it's like a hearkening back, you know. I feel like I hear frequently about the. the military songs that my grandpa would sing, and I do love hearing about it. I think it's a lot of fun. I think it's fun that all those men sang so much.

They didn't get to talk about their feelings, but they got to sing. And isn't that nice? Seeing about a march. I'm Neybeying at both of you. I'm Neybeye and you both. I think that there is something in sea shanties. Have you gotten into seashanties?

There's a difference. I'm true. I don't roll. They lift you up. I think that some of the military, my mom talks all the time about the songs. How dare you, by the way. That my grandpa would say.

It's fun. I think I'm not anti-military song. I'm just saying it is a generational thing. There's all... I think you're anti-Shantai. I am very, very upset with you, MJ, because you hate to see Shanty. Do you have any idea how many Gene Kelly movies I've seen, Jackie? Do you have any idea how many movies he is in?

He's wearing a sailor suit. We're pro shanty. I can name two right now. You don't dare accuse me to be an anti-S shanty. And this is how things get distorted on social media. We don't. like the mansion men military song and all of a sudden we're anti shanty. Anti-shanty. That's completely insane.

Anti-shanty. You're accused me of being anti-shenetic. And I just feel like that's totally unfair. Because you're right. All right. So what we're saying is I'm so glad we discussed this. Here, we are pro seanty and I just want to say. One hundred percent. After all these years, how would I know? You know what? Holden, I'm going to say it. I assume that I made an out of me and me because you don't like history. So I just assumed you don't like shit. What the fuck does a shanty have to do with boring like, oh, this was the emperor of Greece and, you know, whatever.

What is that to do with the other? I think it's overland here because again, the old, the men of yesteryear, World War II men, they weren't allowed to see a therapist. They weren't allowed to talk to their wives about what they had seen. But they did have songs. They had so many songs. A song for everything. But a shanty, by the way, it can be about folklore and stuff.

Also, I would just like to argue anything, anything that's fun to do drunk. Yes. Like Tay. Fulmore, ever more. They write sea shanties about folklore and everywhere. Oh, my God. I mean, they are shanties when you really think about it, you know, and you really look at what they're trying to. Okay.

I'm going to stop you there. There's the damn season. Right. Right. And if T's not write a shanty. But, okay. I will say this. I wish she was.

anything fun to do drunk I'm into. So singing sea shanties, singing military drill songs, not as fun to do while drunk, right? Learning about history, not as fun to do while drunk, right? We need an expert here, because I think you're thinking about

a thing that you have to sing while you're marching in, like, I think there's overlap here. We're out of our element, okay, because there are like, like, put your pussy's in your mouth. That's that. I don't know what I'm a tool.

I don't think that's especially, fun. But I do think that the men and all the wars, there was so much marching. They were marching across whole continents. And so I think they sang a lot of songs whilst marching. And I think some of them were fun and dirty. And, you know, so I think, but

we surely, I have to call my mom and ask her. She remembers every song that my grandpa sang from the military. He brought a lot of the, he sang them all the time. And so we could, there must be somebody who's written about the connection between a shanty and a marching song and the

evolution and all of that. Yeah, please let us know. Please let us know. Please let us know. Please, you must know. Our listeners always, the most niche thing that we put out a call for, we will hear an answer. So we will know.

The craziest thing is that if Jeff were here, I'm sure you might know. Okay, because I don't want to include Jeff in this comment, but I just feel like, you know, the. I feel like you're about to include Jeff in whatever comment you're about to me. I'm just thinking that person who would have a wide knowledge of what you're asking for is also probably, I'm just going to guess like inherently depressive. So they wouldn't Or on the spectrum of it. I don't know

if they'd wish to write an email. You know what you mean? I don't think that it's depressing to know historical songs, Holden. I think that you're the one who thinks, yeah, history is depressing. I think history is enlightening. And uh, enjoy it. Well, you got it. Okay, because we're not going to have

for much longer. We have to learn. We have to learn about it anymore. Haven't you looked around? How would you seen around you lately? We don't have to learn about anything. We did nothing. Free falling. That's my C-Jid.

Free falling hour. Free fall. You know what I mean? No, no. Mine is more like it. Eat me. Sonte to barbecue. Eat me.

We want to pass for now. Well, I hate to. We won't stay fresh for very long. So eat us before we finish this song. I won't continue because we know it gets into very racist. What I would like to bring up though, and I hate to like, I hate to expose Jackie.

I feel like I'm ripping her shirt down and her breasts. Go ahead. Expose me. Go ahead and show my nipples to everybody. I know that there's a bunch of sex predators about to ascend to power. That doesn't mean you can expose Jackie without her. Why?

I thought that I have, I mean, I have been talking about my bit everywhere that I keep doing there. I keep telling Jeff about how he owns me and how I'm not allowed to make any decisions. So like, are you going to hold and own you?

Yeah. He already does. MJ in the podcast now. You're right. Yeah, it changed. Yeah. No, he's my work husband. He already tangentially owns me.

And I have taken the podcast. I've taken the land that is page seven. I'm now king lord. And you all... What are you exposing? What flesh are you pulling out of mine right now? Jackie and Henry feeling a little bit of a tired Thanksgiving this year. And I actually want to bring this up because I feel like a lot of people might be feeling

this way a little bit this year for Thanksgiving. Oh, no. It's a Sadsgiving. It's a Sadsgiving. this year, everybody. But here's a thing, Holden. And while I don't like that you've exposed me, I will say, in all honesty, yeah, it's a weird year, guys. And surprise, I'm not feeling my most like, yay, la la la la, loo, because usually you know, I love Thanksgiving, but I put my fingers in my ears while thinking about like the actual history of Thanksgiving. I try to be like, no, it's just us. And I get to

make a bunch of food and we get to just love each other and isn't that wonderful but you know what some years you look at everything and you go but it's all on fire oh what if we do but isn't it all on fire you we set a table and we just like yeah hate skimming we set a table it's the opposite that's the opposite we need we need the opposite we need it to be like like funsgiving like it needs to be the most fun Thanksgiving to ever exist escapesgiving and i will say to excusegiving i love that mj I will say too, Henry's deal is a little different. Henry just blew his dirty load on Halloween. All over Halloween.

He went hard on Halloween. That party was really, really impressive that they put together. He sprayed us all with his Halloween ooze, and don't get me wrong, I loved it. But this is what I was thinking. I pitched this to Natalie and Henry. We had dinner before Lexi's pool hall hang, which is very cute and fun. Happy birthday, Lexi, favorite Scorpio, besides my mother. Mom, if you're listening besides my mother.

But because Natalie, put on this really impressive Ariel show with some other of her collaborators. It was really cool looking. You've probably seen maybe some pictures on social media that she's posted. Henry's posted. And I thought it was really awesome. So I pitched them for Thanksgiving. I said, why don't, all right, you dress up in a turkey costume and you go up on the ring and do like a dance. Then Henry comes out in a pilgrim costume with a musket. He shoots you down from the ring. And then to say that, now Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving. You know what I mean? Natalie's up on the region. Now it's a make immense. I like the re. It's just like a slight revisionist history where the colonizers were colonizing turkeys instead of the genocide.

I will say I on good put. But there's still a human death technically involved because it will be a person in a turkey costume. I will say on good put this week, I will be attempting to take the pilgrim costume back. But only the female pilgrim costume. Because again, I am put back in my wooden shoes. the way that I'm supposed to. I love a good wooden shoe though. I love a good wooden shoe.

I feel like I need wooden shoes because I feel like I need it to be more difficult for me to get between the crib and the kitchen, which is where I belong fully. That is only where I belong. But now you'll know where I am because I go clop, clop, clop, clop. It's like, oh, Jackie's coming through. Clop, clop, clop, but then you just also hear the

because what they do. don't tell you is that you don't have to not screech the entire time. And I just want to thank the developers at Zoom for putting technology into the Zoom call that cuts Jackie off when she starts screeching into the microphone. It cuts you off as well. Don't you worry. Oh, no, I hear about 60% of what you guys say because of the other 40% is you guys screaming too loud to let it go through.

Too loud for Zoom here on page 7. All right, everybody. Yeah, sometimes you got to scream. Too loud for Zoom. Sometimes you got to get it out of you, all right? Because, yes, next week, we've got hates given coming up. We can't. It's skisgiving.

I like Tiresgiving. Look, let's all acknowledge we're tired. Let's put as minimal an effort as possible to still have a nice Thanksgiving dinner. We don't have to go overboard. No one's judging you. No one's judging you, Jackie. No one's judging anybody. If there's, you know, there's not as many dishes.

is this year, if there's not as much attention to detail. Let's all give each other a fucking break this year. So tired's giving is, that's tired's giving to me and the message I want to send to everybody. We're all tired. And it's understandable, you don't have to Martha Stewart this year, okay? We're beaten down. And you can be tired and then, you know, maybe next year or even sooner, maybe January 20th, we can do engaged giving because we don't want to withdraw completely from society.

You know, we can have our escape. We can have our tired. There's always spring's giving. There's always springsgiving. That's true. And, you know, I think it's okay, Jackie, for you to dress up like a girl pilgrim only because they were always at risk of being burned at the steak. And so I think that that's, you know, you can channel that.

I feel like they weren't the ones out on the front lines doing the real bad shit, I would assume. Yeah. Yeah, I think they're, they're not, we can't exonerate them. No, we certainly can. But I will say, burn them at the steak. It's going to be really fun to have that bonnet on the entire time I cook. Thanksgiving meal because it's going to be, I like no, you know, I don't want to be able to see everything.

I like a limited view scape of what I can see. I think it makes it more difficult, but it makes it a fun challenge. Limited view. Limited view. I want to throw this out too. I kind of want to pitch some kind of like a lingis giving, okay? Anybody who makes the turkey, it could be blow jobs as well. I'm not trying to specify to vagina or penis, but like a lingis giving.

It's Trump's America. I mean, technically you can. But, please continue. There is only two now. In every conflict, there's at least one bitch. A huge bitch, a silly bitch. A little baby bitch, a raggedy bitch. But sometimes it's unclear who the bitch is.

I'm Kara Klank. And I'm Jackie Zabrowski. And on our new Colin Advice podcast, we're going to help you figure out who's the bitch. We want to hear your problems, dilemmas, and quandaries. No topic is off limits. Does your coworker flirt with the boss to get ahead?

Is your bestie having her destination wedding on a holiday weekend? Is your therapist being clingy? Does your friend keep bringing her toddler to adult parties? Come on, there's definitely a bitch in your life, and we want to hear about it. You can email us, DM us, leave us a voicemail, and even call in live to talk to us in person about the alleged bitch in your life.

Just go to who's the bitch.com for all the ways you can contact us. New episodes drop every Wednesday starting in October on The Last Podcast Network, so subscribe now on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. And tune in to our live stream kickoff on September 30th on the Last Podcast Network Twitch channel where we'll be taking your calls live on air. Help us, help you figure out who's the bitch. Lingy's giving, whoever puts that effort into making the turkey, even if it's minimal, they get to get an O via your mouth, if it's consistent.

Who, anybody, they get to just Somebody has to suck off the turkey maker. Somebody has to take them into another room. Oh yeah. And it can be very, the turkey's a little dry, the tongue's a little dry, right?

That kind of thing. That but also you can wait for like instead of like going out and getting sales, you know, maybe we turn like Black Friday we turn it into Back Friday because you on your back. Blow out your back Friday.

You fuck all day on the Friday. Yeah, you're back Friday instead. Tired's giving back Friday. Yeah, back Friday. And I think you get on your back time. I am so into this. Also, how dare us not pitch. The Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade watch along will happen this year with Jackie and I.

Oh, it is happening. And if I'm coming in with this energy, just imagine how much fireball I'll be drinking while singing Christmas carols. Are we going to do it on, oh, no, it's Jackie this year? Was that? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We're going to do it on, oh, no, it's here.

Let's do it. A little bit of a switch. I'll make sure I'm like, have. something on my page so you know because I know everyone's used to going to hold Nader's ho for this, but it will be on, oh no, it's Jackie this year just because I got, uh, the Oscar. Because he's scared of getting banned. I got the Oscar ban. So I'll literally do it again next year, but I have to wait until my copyright thing resets on my own Twitch channel and it resets after a year. It's already done. Oh, no, it's Jackie. Twitch. Twitch.tv. Oh, no, it's Jackie. Six o'clock

in the morning for you, West Coasters. On Thanksgiving. day and for you East Coasters, it starts at 9 a.m. So get your fireballs now. You got to make sure because they might run out. You got to get to the Bevmo. You got to get, but also highly recommend getting a little bit of that rum chada and pouring a little bit of that naughty, naughty nog inside of that fireball because it tastes good, MJ.

You're shaking your head like you're scared. I'm just stuck on the dairy content of rum chata. I somehow made it through last year's page seven holiday season, even though Jackie and Holden were drinking rum chata constantly. I somehow made it through without drinking any of it. And I keep saying, doesn't have dairy in it. And Jackie keeps saying yes. And then I say- No, it says no.

I know. I said, and Jackie, get the pumpkin one. I'm mad at Jackie because she got the peppermint one or whatever. The pumpkin one is far superior. I don't love the pumpkin one. I like peppermint. I'm a peppermin bitch. But it tastes like dairy, right?

It does. But you don't have. the refrigerator. No. It says no refrigeration necessary. She's holding it up right now. I'm holding it right now. It is on my desk. It says Caribbean rum. It does say with real dairy cream, but no refrigeration necessary. We wouldn't call that dairy.

I think I would call real dairy cream dairy. The alcohol balances it can't out. The diseases that would come from dairy sitting out. Is there an expiration date on that? No question. No, no expiration. But I did just crack this. I did throw away the one. that I kept open for a year that was sitting in my,

like in my liquor cabinet. So this is a new one. And that's growth because 10 years ago, Jackie would have drank it. Oh, I would have drank it. I'm like, I was still here. It's not that curdled.

It's fine. You just chunk it down. It's called rum chunkah for a reason. I think the reason is not cold from dinner. The reason is because somebody threw up last year after drinking. And we started calling it rum chunked. Did I throw a, I don't even remember, man.

We were so little. I believe it was me. I believe it was me. They are so let up. By the way. I will be there for the Macy's to parade for a part of it as well. So definitely, yeah, you will.

Please, we always love having you on. And should go ahead and just say out loud, we don't have specific dates yet. But don't worry, we will be fulfilling the promise of a Muppets Christmas carol watch-along as well on Twitch in December and a Cats watch-along might happen just into the new year. If we can make it happen closer to my birthday in December, that'd be great.

But we've got to figure it out. We've got to celebrate Holden. Please. No one celebrates Holden. And we can celebrate all the other that weeks, you know, the off weeks birthdays, you know. We can have a whole big celebration. See, Holden, you still don't get to be celebrated on your own. Exactly.

I will say, yeah, I just want to throw it out there. My birthday is sad and nobody cares. And so December 28th, if you want to show me just any, just acknowledge my existence, because for some reason, literally, it goes into a void and people forget that I am alive. And I don't know what, it's like it's an opposite birthday. It's like they forget I was born. Yeah, what if no one thinks of you? No one thinks.

And then people are wondering why I'm so flipping about other people's birthdays. Oh, why does he not care? But you do this. But I always was excited to go and drink for your birthday every year. Thank you. Because it would be right when I got back from my. a sober house in Florida. So I'd be so excited to celebrate your birthday.

We always celebrated your birthday, but we always celebrated you and Jared's birthday because we also had a good friend whose birthday was the day after your birthday. I don't even know which one's worse. I think his might even be technically slightly worse. I think his might be worse, yes. Yeah, it's awful.

Because it is closer to the holiday. So yours is like right in between. Well, Marcus, yours is kind of a sweet spot. Back when Marcus hosted the show, he always claimed that he had the worst birthday. and it was the birthday, it was the day of the, it's the saddest day. It's the sad day of the year with the most, January 19. The most S words.

And it is also the day before the presidential inauguration every year, which has become increasingly sad. So he's got, so you could only be the third host of page seven if you have a sad birthday. I think that's what you've discovered. If you have a birthday, everyone hates me. Yeah. I would argue that, yes, maybe it is a sad day or whatever with the most S's. But it's far enough away from all of these major holiday dates that you could actually throw a birthday party and people would like be there, like in town.

And like, in fact, I would say guarantee January, nobody wants to smile in January. But still, there's at least people in town. You and he have a sad off. Who's a sad or man? Seriously. I think he has a way better birthday because it's weeks after the holidays. So you can actually be like, hey, people are ready to hang out together again because there are. all, you know, we've gotten a little bit of time.

Oh man, you really need like a rotating chair for tears of a clown to have people come in like in one episode where they fight whether their birthday date is a good day or if it's a bad day. Yeah, this would be a fun tier. It's the best month to have a birthday or the best date to have a birthday. My problem is everyone's exa- everyone's both out of town and even if they were in town, they'd still be like, I can't make it out, dude, because it's so exhausting. I don't know, dude. Christmas is exhausting and the New Year's is a whole commitment.

I am married to someone who has a early November birthday, and I think that that one might take the cake in terms of sadness only every four years. Wow. Love your more. I didn't hear what you said. I can't hear you. Zoom did it for us. But the listeners will know what you call me.

I don't care what you call us. I'm just saying you're not a friendly word about the nature. of you. It was a word that would get us unaloradithms, that is for sure. I'm just saying there's a lot of sad people out there. That's all I'm saying. There are. There certainly are, especially during the holidays. And you know who's sad currently? That's Martha Stewart. Now, we've been talking a lot about Martha Stewart. And we've been talking, I just wanted to finally understand that I actually sought this out. It was like, is there another Martha Stewart documentary coming out? Because she keeps being like,

I don't like this one. I don't like this one. There's going to be another one. I don't like this one. There's going to be another one. There is not one specifically set. She just wants another one made. What is it very funny?

That the director came out and was like, Martha, I think is the only person giving this a bad review? Yeah, he said he teased her about that, which I think is great. So they still have a talking relationship. Imagine teasing Martha Stewart. How is terrifying. It's got to be terrifying.

But also, MJ, you did send me that. reel of Martha Stewart getting shaded by Miss Piggy, which- Yes, several listeners sent that to me. So if you are one of the people who sent me the Miss Piggy and Martha Stewart Instagram Real, thank you. Thank you. It actually, the documentary made me like her more and this reel made me like her more than I've ever liked her before because she can throw it down with Miss Piggy.

She can throw it down with Miss Piggy, but what I actually also like is I feel like Martha might enjoy someone stepping to her. her if she feels like, you know, it's like if it's like someone below her. You know what I mean? I feel like, which is not a lot of people. Like she could tolerate, she could tolerate Miss Piggy. I mean, I guess what I appreciate, and it's actually to talk about a different thing that happened this week in pop culture, the Amelia, I always forget her last name because it starts with a D and an ends in her. Yes, yeah, from chicken shop date. Chicken shop date did the Elmo thing. And, you know, of course we're huge Muppet fans over here. We talk all the time about how Michael

Kane did the best acting performance of any actor ever in a movie with Muppet Christmas Carol. And I feel like I always have respect for people who can play it straight with a Muppet and like can fully immerse themselves in it. Yes, very much so. Who don't, who are like, ha ha, I'm talking to a Muppet. And the chicken shop date with Elmo is fantastic. She approaches it with the exact same, uh, level of seriousness that she approaches in her conversation with Andrew Garfield. It's really, really fun. And I honestly, I mean, there have been multiple. interactions between Miss Piggy and Martha Stewart. Like, how many, I mean, five or six, at least.

So many of them, yes. They've come together a lot over the years. And Mrs. Piggy is really bitchy to Martha Stewart. And Martha Stewart just like, she just rolls with it. You know, she doesn't break character, basically. Like, she fully stays Martha Stewart, which I don't actually think is a character. But what I love about her and Miss Piggy is a heightened version of herself when she's public. I think that's right.

And she just doesn't, like, it's just Martha Stewart talking to Miss Piggy. There's no cheekiness about it. Also, if you're curious, look up Miss Piggy destroying Martha Stewart for a minute and a half is what the title of this reel is. And it's just different splices of Miss Piggy just like shutting down Martha Stewart or just like having these like one-liners at her that like actually make Martha Stewart pause. Yeah, like if a puppet could. would roll her eyes. Like it would be rolling her eyes at Martha's like like Miss Piggy very much in on the joke. But again, Martha Stewart is playing it completely straight. And it does give me a lot of respect for her. But yeah, I love that she doesn't like the documentary. It needs another one. Even though it's like a pretty comprehensive documentary. I feel like I learned about every era of her life. And she just needs more. Who's going to love their documentary about their life?

An narcissist. She has to deal with the fact there's just going to be stuff. in there that in her life that she doesn't love or love revisiting. But it's really fascinating for us. And it does, unfortunately, for her, really build out her character. I think what would be interesting is maybe if she, like, had a companion piece where she just added, like, even just like a half an hour companion piece. Oh, my God.

Oh, like a director's cut. Like a director's cut. Like a DVD director's cut. That would be fun. That would be fun. Please, please. Yeah, or a director's cut. She either does a director's cut.

she like takes out what she didn't like and do, but it's Martha's cut not a director's cut, right? Either Martha's cut or, which I feel like it would come off as insane by the way, but commentary would actually be probably charming and funny. Like the Martha's cut, you'd probably just be like, bro, because everyone sees themselves differently

than everybody else. But even down to like the angle that the director chose for her and her like one shot in the interview section of the documentary, she was like, that was my bad angle. I told him not to use that angle, and he had to use that angle. No one thinks about it.

No one's thinking about it, Martha. But I do, it made me a little sad at first because I kept seeing these headlines being like, Charlie X-EX gives scathing remarks about Martha Stewart in her SNL monologue. And I was like, I had to go back and look at it because I was like, I was watching portions of that. What are you talking about? And it's like she was essentially explaining what Brat is. and she had said that like, for example, the new Martha Stewart documentary, when Martha gets mad about an old magazine article and she says that she's glad the journalist who wrote it is dead, that is Brad. That is Brad. And then last Friday, when that exact journalist responded and said, hey, I'm alive, bitch, that is also extremely brat. And I don't think that that is a scathing takedown of Martha Stewart whatsoever. I think it actually is very much. I think it actually is very much. funny and it is Brad.

It makes her cooler, if anything. I love that she said that. And I want to say this to like all of the misguided headlines that I've seen of like, do you not understand that people want to be Brad? Right, right, right. It's like it's a vibe. It's a good thing. Like it's a fun thing.

It's not like, oh, she's being brat and that's bad because that's messy and it's bad. It's like, no. Remember Brad's summer? It wasn't that long ago. Well, it's, yeah, no, but nobody knows what Brad is and they're attributing it's completely the wrong thing and they have no idea what the fuck. Right.

They just think it's like, it means cool, right? Or something. And you're like, no, that's your old. Well, it's fascinating to think about what a Martha cut would even be because she's like, she is like able to be self-awareish and she's able to be like self-criticalish. Like I don't think that a Martha cut would only ever be the good things that happened to her. But I also think she is such a story. own cold bitch, which is one of the most, like, that's why she's Brett.

She's the most, it's the most interesting thing about her. She's just been unapologetically like, I don't care if you think that I'm like too cold. I don't care if you think that I should be like warmer. I'm going to make a fucking wreath, but I'm going to do it meanly. You know, it's amazing. Well, and especially, yes. And how many times where she's like, other men that are my age act this way. And it has never been a, but they're asshole.

It's like, no. She was always treated differently. And she's like, yeah, I'm a frozen ice queen. And I'm power hungry. And if I was a man, that would be seen as admirable. But because I'm a woman, it's the most objectionable thing that anybody could ever think of. And also, yeah, and also I just happened to be a ruthlessly competitive business person in the domestic sphere. So the shit I'm doing is like making a heart out of different color candles.

You know, but while I'm doing it, I could rip your face off. Like, it is an amazing. I can't believe how much I, the journey I've gone on with Martha and Ina. this month has been really, really something. And I can't believe I'm coming out team Martha. I do want to say thank you to the person that sent me. It was like maybe it's a little bit of like, you know, a one for Aina, even though we know how she feels about Martha Stewart. And it was some old video in like 2018. And she was, Ina was being interviewed. And she was asked, like, what would you serve Donald Trump? And she laughed and just went, a subpoena. And I was like, I know. How funny is that?

You zip. You're being a zip right now. It's extremely I'm a joke. And you could just imagine her the self-congratulatory chuzzle. She did. Of course. Love that. But then like you think about Martha Stewart talking about John Krasinski winning the people's sexiest man of the year. Don't get me started. And I love this. She was just like, John's pretty sexy. He's been over to my house and he's pretty sexy. And then she looked down the camera and went pretty good at all the work he does. too. Watch out why. Jack, I think you meant towards Emily Blunt. I think you meant to say she stared down the barrel of the camera. You're talking about Cynthia Arrivo right now? Oh, Cynthia Arriva, which again, man, she gets, okay, I know that I am a very sensitive

person and I need to like understand that and identify that before I go into this story that I literally just saw where Cynthia Arrivo was asked by Dax Shepard if how, how how she wipes her ass with how long her nails are. And you can see that she's just like, I use my fingers. I use like the pads of my fingers. Like as if she was offended. Oh yeah, but is your pussy green?

I'm sure they're so done with the PR circuit right now. I'm sure they are just at the end of a very long. They just keep holding hands and staring into each other's eyes, crying about. And also, this comes from a person that has cried almost every time I've watched the Wicked trailers. So I get it. I'm a very sensitive person. But I can't imagine. It's why I would never want to be an Ariana Grande or a Cynthia Revo because I know I could never handle it.

No way would I ever want something like that. They just seem to have been sent off in this emotional spaceship where it's like just the two of them and we have to like look at them all the time and all they can do is gaze into each other's eyes and sob. I'm like, what is, yeah, it's they're crying all the time. They're clutching each other. They can't like go to each other. We watched like a montage of them crying and in her jacket on jacket. Yeah, why are they trauma bonded?

Did something terrible happen? I'm telling me because we talk about how much they look like scryckly as well. Yeah, they're like becoming. After the making of this movie. And it just seems like something like, yeah, something happened to them on this. journey they went on together where I feel like it's like it's like triveled their soul or so I don't even know what it is yeah I don't understand what wicked is doing to us like it is everywhere I'm gonna leave the theater like with really long nails yeah exactly you're going to I think your

pussy's gonna be green yes my pussy gonna turn green I kept thinking about how funny it would be to ask her in an interview on this press store for pussy's green like after that her making that comment being upset about it. Now, I also will say that imagine the kickback. What do you think the kickback is going to be about the fact that they are not advertising that it is only part one of the story and that it is actually two parts and that the second part is going to be released next Thanksgiving? It worked for Dune. It worked for Dune. So because I remember being in the theater with Henry and we got to see the sneak preview and we had no idea as a two-parter and literally just the opening titles it said Dune and then it said part one and everybody in the audience was like what okay like everyone

was like but then it was like all right I get you know fuck it I guess I mean I think it makes a little more sense for Dune than Wicked because how what was Wicked's run time as a Broadway show I mean but here's the thing is that they're adding in a bunch of stuff from the book yeah so it was just a normal length I mean nothing that I remembered it being an insane it wasn't like epically no it's not like Le Miz you know it's not even even like Le Miz was one movie. But they are adding a bunch of stuff in apparently from the book that the musical leaves out. So a lot of people are excited about that. But it is, everybody kind of knows that the second half of the movie is not as strong. And this is not my personal review that like this is a lot

of the things online. There's a like the second half is not as strong as the first half. And I'm very curious. But the first half is three hours long. So we're going to spend another year, like, talking about these guys again. Oh, yeah. It's exhausting. Did you see the clip like the first clip that leaked? I have to ask you guys, because of course, we're musical theater people here, and we are Ariana ambiguous in our feelings. I was going to say Arianeator, but that I wouldn't want to upset you. Yeah, that would make me fucking furious. Thank you.

We are Ariana, you know, agnostic, but we are musical theater zealots. And they leaked the clip of her singing popular, like our first little sneak peek. And the internet was ablaze with opinions about it. And the opinions, the consensus seemed to be that it was bad. Really? So I'm wondering how you guys felt. Well, just that. I don't really have much of a point of reference, but I know that they also showed Amanda C.

did like a little kind of back, like just kind of karaoke style like clip of her singing it. And everyone's like, it should have been her. It should have been her. But I couldn't really tell much of a difference personally. I think that there is, again, I'm not a wicked head. So I have to defer to Jackie on it. But I think that basically what people were feeling like was that there is like singing a song in a musical is not just the same thing as singing a song. Right.

Like musical theater acting, musical theater singing is a different thing. And what I saw people say... It's a different study of theater. Right. Yeah. Right, right, right. And that to see Ariana sing this famous musical theater song popular is like that it really showed how much she is not a musical theater actor. She is a good singer and she is an actor.

She's experienced actor. But that this, it's like, I feel like it's very, it reminds me of the La La Land conversation where like you can be a talented actor. but it doesn't make you like a song and dance man. You know what it is with this specific song? A, it's definitely not the best song of Wicked. B, I do feel that this song is made like, it is a smaller song that done with the big face. Like it's like what they teach you in theaters,

you act big. That because you're trying to take up space, you're trying to communicate something. But in movie acting, it's very different because it's much. smaller and it needs to be a lot more concise because you can convey so much more with subtler movements of your face. Yeah.

Now, we're so used to a Kristen Chenoweth who brings such a big, like she fills the whole room with her energy. And I do feel that Ariana in that clip is very much not the egocentric character that she's supposed to be. But also it's the medium. It is the medium. And I am curious to see how that is going to play out in the movie that if she is going to be more reserved throughout all of it

or at some point, or is this like a buildup? Because again, two movies. Right, right, right. And a lot's got to change. And popular's in the beginning of the musical. So like I do, before I completely judge her whole performance, I'd like to see it first. Yeah.

Which we're going on Sunday. You are going on Sunday. So excited. And I am very, very excited about it. And I'm going to sing. I don't even know. And I'm trying to figure out what my cocktail's going to be

because I don't want to get too like, I think maybe just light edibles for this. Tequila shots. Oh. You think tequila shots. So full-blown tequila shot. I can see like a tequila shot going in, but I think I don't want to get like,

I'm not getting eras wasted for this. But Holden. but old we were so like shamed by being so drunk in the middle of the afternoon at the I don't know what you're talking about we made friends we were we were the life of the party we did make a lot of friends yeah and then we were all dancing in the front of the theater at the end zinials behind us though wanted to murder us they were so they were so embarrassed for us I looked behind me while I was singing cruel summer and there was a dude with the hoodie like fully over the face like he looked full, you know, like,

you were dragged here, and I feel sad for you that you were dragged here, doesn't mean you need to put that puss on your face. Man, nothing, honestly, though, that's a problem. That'd be fun. Tracking the husbands that were dragged to wicked will be fun as well. I've just excited, like, it makes me so excited when people look at me and go like,

you should be, how could you act like that? And I'm like, oh, like this. And it's just like, it's great, you know. I feel like we. need more of that in our Thanksgiving. This is, you know, part of Escapesgiving, I think, is going to be like, act sillier. Yeah. We got to have a smile on our face. I do, I do feel, today in the shower, I was agonizing. You shower today. I'm proud of you. Yeah. Very proud. Good job. So we did that for the first time since the ocean.

Wonderful. And I was, you know, silently agonizing as I do. And I just said to myself, you know, I don't want to give that man the power to make me feel sad every single day for four years. And so I do think... And you're talking about me and I get it. I have... And I'm tired. Holden has vowed, yeah, to make the next four years the worst four years of both of our lives. And we're like, please don't do this to us.

Like, we don't eat the hell. So, yes, well, I don't want to go full escape skiving mode all the time. I do think that it is true that we should be loud and silly, screaming, drunk and public, you know, singing musicals, whatever we'd fucking need to do right now. Yeah. Just go sing that musical. God, if it's really bad, I'll, I don't know. I don't know how I'm going to get through Thanksgiving.

I want it to be good. I want it to be good. I don't know. I don't think it has a chance of being like cats bad. So I'm not like gearing up for that. And I, you know, so yeah, it would just be like mediocre. So I think it's going to be great. All the reviews so far have been great, you know?

Is there an example of a musical? that on film recently, like in the last 10 years, that has been critically acclaimed. Because I feel like everybody hated Les Mis. And I was just like, you guys are just, people didn't like it. But I was like, people are just, again, it's the same thing as like,

this is a stage show. And it loses something being brought to film because it's just like, I feel like people were like, this is like too flashy and like what else. But I think anything, anytime you have something that is a stage show and it's a hard translation and I'm trying to think now, what, because cats obviously bad.

really liked the West Side Story, the Steve, I didn't see that version of. Yeah, I haven't seen that. I enjoyed it. I enjoyed it. Okay. It was solid. It was one of those that was like a little, like we already got a perfect West Side Story back in the day. Yeah. It was the only thing I would say about that. Yeah, right. Do we need to redo this? But it was solid. It was absolutely solid. I would say that's probably the last big one. Because I'm thinking like, yeah, you're right. Like, because we had like dream girls and this is not a blockbuster, but I do hire. recommended to people, which is Dix the Musical, which a friend of mine in New York, 824 distributed it.

Megan the Stallion is in it. It is not for children. Obviously, it's called Lex the Musical, but I would say slap it on because I had a blast with Dix the Musical. And I don't know how he got, my friend Josh got Megan the Stallion and Nathan Lane and Megan Mulali in it. Wow. Unbelievable. It's fun, though.

Also, so many people hate it that I don't even, I don't even understand how it's critically acclaimed, but La La Land was probably one of the more recent ones. And so many, I liked it a lot, but no one else likes it. Yeah, people loved La La La. Yeah, I guess I'm thinking specifically of stage shows recently adapted to film because I think everybody loves sound of music. Everybody loves, you know, Music Man and Mary Poppins and some of those older ones.

But in terms of recent adaptations, so many of them have been reviled, you know, because I think musical, you know, you know, stage shows take on such a kind of sacredness. Just like adapting a book to a movie, people are always going to be like it didn't work. I want to rewatch Chicago. Oh, Chicago. People were in Chicago. At this point, that was decades ago, you know, at this point.

Yeah. That was a while ago. How old is that move? I was in high school. Chicago is 2002, bruh. Yeah. It was fucking 22 years ago, bro. 22 years ago.

That was 22 years ago. Isn't that crazy? Man. Wow, time keeps on ticking, ticking, ticking, ticking, into the future. But I guess we've ticked all the way to our celebrity conspiracy theory. Also, shout out to Sing Street, my favorite musical.

It's not like necessarily universally screamed about, but it should be because it's awesome. Sing Street, everyone wants to Sing Street. Oh, is it fun? It's incredible. Yeah, I liked it. I know, but you're not giving it enough gravitas. Oh, it was incredible.

Sounded music, a movie before it was a stage show. Anyway, I didn't think it about sound of music. I love it. Oh, okay. No, you know how I feel about kids. singing, though, Holden. So that's... They're not kids.

They're... Anyways. It's Y.A. Okay. Hit me with the share. Do you believe it? Is Lord actually a bird part two? Whoa.

I was going to say, we've done this one. This one comes in from Annie. More information? Yeah, this one comes in again from Annie who writes, hi again, friends. It's time to build on the Lord is a bird theory, which is my legacy. I'll get straight to the evidence. First, we have a picture of Lord wearing a bird necklace in the music video

magnets by disclosure. Wow, she's not even trying to hide it. Next, we see where she donated proceeds for one of her EPs. That's right, an organization called a bird. She's in bed with Big Bird, not to be confused, with the Sesame Street character. Finally, in New Zealand, where she's from, Mayori Culture, New Zealand, Maori culture, birds are often said to tell the future. Well, in this article, there is evidence of Lord telling the future regarding the Me Too movement.

Now, I had links to a BuzzFeed article that Annie links to claiming that Lord is a witch, not a bird, but says that she can foresee the future. She's a witch, not a bird. Because before the Me Too movement happened, she tweeted in January of 2017, these old men in power have a storm coming, the likes of which they cannot comprehend. She goes on to write, it's all coming together. That's what Annie writes. Not to mention New Zealanders sometimes use the slang term used by the English to describe a woman, a bird.

Bird. My suspicions have grown. I think she's really flying under the radar with this one. Hope you enjoy. And as always, you gotta be soup in me. Thank you, Annie. You gotta be soup in me. Yes, match.

So what do you guys think? Do you think, like, how would it work if she is a bird? She flies. She pecks. Like, she's just a giant bird, or is, like, a little bird is inside of this, like, kind of robot woman's body? Honestly, I think that is it. Or is she just a giant bird?

Yeah, I think that there's some sort of, like, a driver that lives within her that maybe she might like all of a sudden like almost like a transformer-esque thing like the like the wings will just like flip flip flip flip flip so the bird lives in her but the bird that lives inside of her has outfitted her body to be a like a you know a transitive robot for them so that they both can act as a bird in conjunction so would you say that that bird just there's like a collection bowl underneath the bird where all of the life bird shit and everything kind of collects. Army Hammers' father's chair. Army Hammer's father's chair situation. Instead of a woman, it's just a receptacle for shit. You can't call it a collection plate because that's what they pass around at church.

Right. And that's where I put my shit, MJ. And I go, oh, good. They got to put a potty that we got to put in our hands. So yeah, it's some kind of like something like that that all the stuff collects. and then maybe just a balloon kind of thing pushes it out of the robot man because you have to realize

like we can't be having and then how does the bird eat inside of the robot Lord? What if it's like, you know like how they used to show how your lungs would be all caked with nicotine and the tar from smoking cigarettes? Maybe that's what the inside of Lord looks like

because maybe the bird shit is just everywhere. Right. It's just... Like maybe it's all caked inside of her and it's corroding her arteries. So she's dying, we're saying now. She's a bird that's stuff. Robot woman that a bird's inside that is dying.

Oh my God, we got to get that bird out of that lady. Yeah, let's get the bird out of the woman. If anybody wants to take a scalpel allegedly to Lord. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No one dissect. Allegedly. Allegedly. There are also, I need everybody to know that there is a bird called the Lord God bird. Well, there you go. It's a woodpecker. There you go.

It's a special woodpecker that's so. special. It is critically endangered and it's called the Lord Godbird. It looks just like every other woodpecker. Well, it's a special one. There you go. But this one is not like the other one beckers. Not like the other birds. He ain't pecking in the wood.

He's pecking in a plaster and it's good hard to speak. I have a lot apparently to say about birds. And while I don't think you should keep them as pets, I'm kind of anti. the keeping of birds as pets. As someone that grew up, we always had birds and it always made me kind of sad. Yeah. And I, but I do believe that the bird

that lives inside a lord, I don't think it would live on the outside. So I guess we've got to keep that bird inside of that late. It's a symbiotic relationship. Yeah. Keep it in its shit cave. Like those sharks that sleep on the other side of the sharks and then they eat the leftovers of what the shark doesn't eat.

Fish? Tom Cruise? Whoa. Oh, jinks. You can't talk till Thanksgiving. I'm fine. Thank God. Can you do all the shows?

Can you do them? Please. Crescent City is a stupid book. How dare? How dare you never, how dare? Oh my God. Say that to my huge S.J.M. Tattoo that is starting.

Oh, my God. Follow Julian Ashby on Insta because Julianne is making me an insane piece. That includes throne of glass and Crescent City. And Akatar all in one piece. Looks to be your best tattoo thus far, even though I know you don't care about the quality of your tattoos. I do care about the quality of my tattoos. Better than our, I forget it, chughead.

It's Riverdale. Well, this one she worked on for five and a half hours, and I had to go in for a second sitting. I've never even got, I've never had a tattoo big enough that I had to do multiple sittings before. So I feel like I've just crossed like a threshold of tattooedum. I never had before. You're like, how am I coping?

It's tattoos giving for Jackie. Tattoo-Giv-Gene. He's been getting like five tattoos since the election. Yeah, I keep getting tattoos. It's because it's the, you know, it's a beautiful kind of hurt that you pay for. And I'm not drinking every day and I'm not eating a bag of candy every day. And so sometimes, you know, you got to turn that frown into a tattoo gun. And you say, put them right in me, babe. Put them right in.

For me, it's cheese and pickles and beer and beer and beer. That sounds great. That sounds great. That's great. I love it. Wait, what kind of cheers and pickles? What combo you do? We got at that we've been going to that.

That farmer's market. God damn it. All of us are now. We should all be going together. Lexi ran into everybody there. Lexi ran into Henry, Ed, and Julie. We're all going to this damn farmer's market. Just hoping we'll see, you know, Jeremy Allen White.

There's bouncy houses for Winnie and stuff like that. No, that's where we saw Henry. We just leave Henry in the bouncy house. In the bouncy house. He bounces. You have a bouncy house at your farmer's market? And there's a pickle guy. There's a pickle guy who made a children's book that when he all has requested every single

bedtime and nap time since we've gotten it since Sunday. She's just in love with this pickle guy's pickle book. Love the pickle guy. Is it about pickles? Yeah, it's about the special way he brines the pickles. Wow. And when he loves it. Oh.

But it's like a talk. Picking Pickle, man, and he's like, I have no idea. And all the other pickles are making fun of them because they don't think his apple, cider, vinegar, brine will be. So it is about the brining process of the pickles. I thought you were joking. Okay, well, you know, I'm glad that Winnie is learning. And apparently all the proceeds from the book go to blind people somehow.

But regardless, we've got a pickle guy and we have a cheese lady. From there, we got smoked Gouda and an aged white cheddar. And it's a pickle cheese lover's delight in my best. at night with my beer and my sadness and my fear. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Yes. Yes. Yes. We're sad. Reaching cheese and pickles in bed. Yes. Tiredsgiving. I'm inviting everybody for Thanksgiving to my bed where I will just have crackers,

cheese and pickles. We always put out a cheese and pickle plate before Thanksgiving. Then you're my favorite host. It's in Holden's bed. Yeah, I love pickles and cheese. Anyways, we, what do we do that? Is it time for the list? Yeah.

Wait, are you, our conspiracy theories, right? We believe it there's a bird inside the woman. I don't think there's more to say about it. Yeah, yeah. You want to make a bird. Right, right, right. Sing the song. Who's on the list?

Jackie, you got to have that list. Times co-stars working relationships were so fraught, they reportedly didn't want to appear on camera together. Now, there were some on this list that I remember from other lists like Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams reportedly grew so thick that he demanded another actor read her lines off the camera.

Wait, what does grew so thick mean? They don't like each other? Yeah, sometimes you grow thick. The tension grew so thick. Ah, oh, the tensions grew so thick. Okay. How dare you not just assume the words that I didn't say, MJ?

No. Wait, they didn't like each other in the notebook, really? No. Wow, I didn't know that. Even the director said, maybe I'm not supposed to tell the story, but they were really not getting along

one day on set. Really not. And Ryan came to me and there's 150 people standing in this big scene and he says, Nick, come here. He's doing a scene with Rachel and he says, would you take her out of here and bring in another actress to read off camera with me? I said, what? He says, I can't.

I can't do it with her. I'm just not getting anything from this. We went later on, they went into a room with a producer. They started screaming and yelling at each other. I walked out. And it got better after that, you know, they had it out. I think Ryan respected her for standing up for her character and Rachel was happy to get that out in the open. the rest of the film wasn't smooth sailing, but it was smoother sailing.

Yeah, I love that they had that, that tension. Oh, man, fight it out, fight it out, fight it out, fight it out. But also kind of worked for their character. And I think it's part of the reason why the notebook is a good, like, holds up. And we do know as well that Dwayne the Rock Johnson called some of the male fate and the furious co-stars chicken shit and candy asses. and it led to a speculation of a feud between him and Vin Diesel. Now, I want to re-watch, and it's weird that this movie got brought up because I've been kind of wanting to re-watch the movie. I love trouble because apparently co-stars Julia Roberts and Nick Nulte had so much trouble getting along that they filmed with stand-ins more often than with each other.

Interesting. Did they have a cool chemistry too, like an interesting chemistry? I don't. I want to re-watch it. I remember seeing it when I was really young and I feel like it's one of those movies you, like I didn't get enough and I'd like to re-watch it. I've just been like seen. You know when a movie starts like peaking out over like the sunsets at you and you're like, why are you peeking at me? Right. You're beckoning me to watch. I Love Trouble is beckoning me for some reason. So let me know if you like love I love trouble and you're like, it's because of this. Let me know. Anyway, apparently in 2012 Patton Oswald told the AV club that while filming Blade Trinity his co-star Wesley Snipes quote was just fucking

crazy in a hilarious way he said one day Wesley came down to the set which he only did for close-ups everything else was done by a stand-in I only did one scene with him he also said a lot of the lines that Ryan Reynolds has were just a result of Wesley

not being there we would all just think of things for him to say and then cut to his face not doing anything because that's all we would get from him. It was kind of funny. We were like, what are the worst jokes and puns that we can say to this guy? And then it would just be his face going, hmm, smiles are contagious. It's so, so dumb. And I can only imagine working with some, why do the movie, if you refuse to do any of it, you're just going to have a stand in. I know for money, but also Wesley Snipes, what Wesley Snipes denies it. Yeah, man, Wesley Snipe denies it. but I don't know.

I've heard multiple things about Wesley Snipes, and I don't think that he is the right one in this scenario. I'm fairly sure. Wow. Or at least maybe I'm just picking up what all the blinds for years and what articles have said about him. Obviously, I don't know the man. But what I do know is that Richard Geer and Sylvester Stallone

did not get along during the Lords of Flatbush. Again, this is another one of those movies that I've read about on so many lists, but have never actually watched. Have either one of you seen the Lords of Flatbush? No. No, but I want to. Yeah.

I feel like I've heard a lot. It's like one of these movies that just like, people are like, you gotta see the Lords of Flatbush. Why? Why do they say that? I don't know. I think it's come up on page seven several times before. Yes.

And I think that it is like, I think it's like a New York movie as well. So I think it's one of those where it's just like, you just kind of got to like get it in you. Yeah. as someone who lives in that kind of general area of Brooklyn, people are like, this is a foundational text. You gotta know the movie, so I guess. But this, I had no idea. After a horseback riding injury forced Sean Young to drop out of Batman, producer John Peters wanted Michelle Pfeiffer to replace her. However, Michael Keaton reportedly blocked her casting as his love interest because they were exes in real life. In 2019, co-star Robert Wool said at the time, Michael Keaton reportedly blocked her casting as his love interest because they were exes in real life. In 2019, co-star Robert Wool said at the time Michael told me he was trying to get back with his ex-wife. Keaton was firmly and underlined firmly against that casting of Fyfer and he and Peters got into it.

However, Michael changed his tune when Michelle was cast as Catwoman and Batman Returns. She told Entertainment Tonight, it was great actually working with him having had a history because I was really out of my element. Also, the fact that he had done this kind of picture before and I didn't know what to expect. I felt really comfortable with him. I felt really safe with him. I could go to him and say, why am I feeling so awful? I don't know what's going on.

And he would explain to me, I know, I went through it with the first one. And it does, I like that they were able to get past that because, man, she's iconic. Michelle Pfeiffer, god damn. Yeah, she's iconic in that role. Michelle Pfeiffer could do to me as Catwoman. Yes, and please.

You know, I saw a clip from this movie for Christmases with, John Favreau and that hot woman from Eastbound and Down, and I'm really sorry. I can't remember her name right now. But it was really funny. I was like, I've never seen Four Christmases before. MJ, are you a big fan of Four Christmas? I would call myself a fan, but I have seen it and I'm honestly trying to figure out why I've seen it. Maybe it was on all the time. I feel like it was on all the time. I feel like it was on all the time. Yeah. I think it's like, I think I've seen it in like a kind of like, you know, the kind of like desperation that you get in mid-December where you're like, I've got to feel something about Christmas.

I guess I'll watch four Christmases, you know. I've definitely seen it. And yeah, you know, I've had a roller coaster relationship with Vince Vaugh, and I loved him in swingers, and it's been pretty much a downhill roller coaster since then. But I have seen four Christmases, and you know what? I don't think I hate it. But the downhill roller coasters is the fun part of the roller coaster.

You mean, it's going to slow creeping up the roller coaster. Also, by the way, her name is Katie Mixon. I really, really, really love Katie Mixin. But watching that clip, I was like, I guess I need to watch Four Christmases. So I'll let you know, MJ. I will watch it for us. After Thanksgiving, I will watch it for us. And I will let you know because apparently, while filming Four Christmases,

Reese Witherspoon reportedly got frustrated with her co-star Vince Vaughn because his nonchalant attitude conflicted with her perfectionism. Further reports alleged she refused to film a sex scene that was written in the script. However, Reese did not. rumors of a feud and in the press, the co-stars had nothing but kind things to say about each other. But apparently Reese Witherspoon takes her work very seriously. And Vince Vaughn does not.

So think about that. Yeah, think about it. Think about it. Okay. And I guess that's it. So keep thinking about it. All right. Well, I'll think about it while my vision starts getting clothing.

Oh, no. I'm sorry for you. And Larry's getting larger. Wow. I think I'm going. Blind items. Oh, we can't see him. This A-list actor slash sometime director was drinking up a storm this week.

Is that a good thing for him? By the way, everyone's drinking again. That's the blind. Gee, I wonder why. I wonder why everybody is just relapsing like crazy left and right. This guy, though, it's been a rough go for him. And we love him over here on page seven. Bad Affleck.

Absolutely. People think he's drinking just because he looked actually happy at an outing in NYC this past weekend for the first time since getting married to J-Lo. It really was. I think it was last week. Henry, we were hanging out and Henry's like, why are you in such a good mood? I was like, I'm drunk. And I don't really drink anymore.

So you see me drunk and you're like, yeah, I was in a good mood that one. Yeah. There you go. Yeah, I don't know. Not that I'm saying that we need to drink to be happy, guys. We can't. We can't go down that road. All right.

I am. It's thanks. It's tired's giving. It's tired of giving. The shell of a man actor and his wife are not in a good place right now. We just did about an a flat one until then. Well, and his wife, this one's still married to someone. He should not be.

Are not in a good place right now. He would go broke if they got divorced, though. All that child support. Brad Pitt. No. No. Alex Baldwin. Alec and Hilaria.

He recently stated in an interview that he, quote, wasn't very fun, end quote, on the upcoming reality show that. He said, when it's coming out, he said, coming out January, I think, according to Talick Baldwin. So really getting out there with that PR grind and making sure everybody knows about it. If he thinks he was not fun, that good news is that that means it's going to be really fun for us. But don't worry. The article also states, I mean, those kids' personalities, they're so interesting.

And they all shine through, Jackie, while you're watching. So you get to really get a nice giant. I wouldn't let you pay me to take care of those kids or be around those kids and a good amount of money like a rich person amount of money and yet I'm gonna watch them on a TV and like endure that. I don't know if I'll be able to get past the first episode.

You know I'm going to. I am too. But all I want is the sad Alex stuff and Hilaria being an idiot but I have to deal with all these fucking kids too. You know? Which is going to be grating. I'm going to watch it though.

God, I feel like I'm going to want to punch these kids in their heads, bro. It's going to be rough. Don't blame the kids. I think that it will be, like, yes, there are many of them, and they will surely be very loud, and they're probably pretty entitled because they're so rich. But also, I think it will be so, we will be so busy hating Haleadia and Alex that I think that we don't think the kids will face it.

And how they're not actually parent, doing any real parenting, and just kind of letting them do whatever, and then letting the help, like, do the work. Although Kim Kardashian just came out and was like, everybody says, oh, you've got all this help. Oh, you've got all this help. But at the end of the day, I'm still just a single parent. So think about what Kim Kardashian goes through. Okay. Very wealthy, single parent.

Yeah, I still just have no idea. Very, very wealthy with a whole team of people. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I still have no actual idea what the reality of the world is. Good for you. Even down to the fact that, like, MJ, I know, like, feeding your children is something that, like, you have really had to work on. Just think of even the idea of having a chef whose job it is to make sure your kids eat. And have something they will eat and something that will be nutritious for them.

And a different variety of meals all planned out. Even just that alone. Even just that. She doesn't pack their lunches for school. I mean, that's the whole thing. Getting Winnie down at the end of the night and then realizing I still have to pack her lunch, even though it's not that hard of an activity, but you're so drained. And you just can't believe there's one more thing you have to do for her after you.

after you finally gotten her to fucking slumber out for a little bit. Or you can be like, my mom, my mom packed our lunches all through high school. Wild. Our entire lives, my mom made us lunches. Well, honestly, that was better than what we did, which, it's a little meditative. I got fries and a giant lemonade slushy every day for lunch instead. And I'm sure as they want to buy, as soon as my kids want school lunch, they can have it, especially luck wonderfully in New York City.

School lunch is free for all, as it should be everywhere. And, but, but yeah, no, as soon as they want to eat school lunch, they can, they can have it. But I think about this all the time with celebrities just because, yeah, I mean, I'm blessed to have, like, the amount of time with my kids where I, like, I have sensitive kids or whatever, but like all kids have their things where it's like the pizza needs to be cut into squares or whatever. Of course, yeah. I think about this all the time with celebrities. Like, I know that at the end of the day, no matter how much help you have, and we have talked about this, like, no matter how much help you have, I think kids want their parents. Right? And I'm sure that they, they, and, you know, I don't want to take away like motherhood from Kim Kardashian. She is their mom. And Hilaria, I think probably is pretty, probably has at least one to two kids with her at all times.

And their dad is the psychopath. So that does ask. Yeah. The Kardashian kids have us have a, have a, have a, have Kanye for a dad. And the Baldwin kids have Allen Baldwin for a dad. But like, but yeah, it. And I, and I have a, and I have a, and I'm very blessed to have family close by. A lot of people don't have. So I think about it on both. I think all the time. about people who don't have any support and who are totally isolated with all the like the labor of it. And then I also, or who don't have any community. You know, like people where you're like, oh, shit, there's a kid needs to go to the emergency room and the other kid is sleeping. Like, what do I do? You know, like that type of thing.

And then I also think about the other end with celebrities who just have like probably 20 people. How many staff do you think are on task to keep to take care of those four kids when it from the child care, the transportation, the school, the food? like how many people are employed just on making those kids' lives go. What does that mean for your parenting? It is very fascinating to think about. Well, here's, we're kid crazy here in the blind items. Last one.

It does seem kind of strange that the A-list actress and her significant other are having a baby and don't even live together. Megan Fox and Machine Gun Kelly. So maybe they're having a baby? Yeah. Megan Fox is pregnant. I don't think that living together,

I don't think, I don't think, I don't. I think you, I truly feel that that is completely different if you have that level of money. Yeah, well, I think it's more insinuating that they haven't worked out there. Coverage of child care. Yeah. Right. But I think they're more insinuating that they haven't, like, worked out their marital differences and are excited to be having a kid together. But it's like, you know, whatever.

They fucking knows. You know what I mean? Who knows guys? Everybody's out of here screaming at each other and ripping each other's hair out of their heads and all sorts. It's chaos. Well, I like Megan Foxx because she's been so cool about her kids. Remember there was like the her kids, some of her kids are gendered unconforming and she's been very cool about it. Of course.

And so that made me like her a million times more. And then I saw Jennifer's body and I like her even more. And I'm having, I know they, but anytime I know of people who have been struggling to have a baby and they have had their struggles and then, you know, get to that point. I'm always very happy for them. So I'm still very happy for them. But, ooh la la, la, I was also a weird week for blinds. Because again, it's just like, Keshe's drinking again. Oh, that's.

So is, and Justin Timberlakes in rehab. And, like, everybody's just, everybody's just drinking. I mean, allegedly, these are blind items. I know. I just, all the blinds are literally just like, this person's also, it's like, yeah, we're all drinking. Everyone started drinking two weeks ago. Gee, you wonder how it happened. You know what I mean?

Let it take over our lives. You can't, guys. We won't let this. But I think you're able, I think you're allowed to have a tired Thanksgiving at a little time of, like, tired drinking. I think it's. okay, as long as you pull yourself out of it, by the end of the holidays at least. I mean, imagine being one of,

imagine writing like a song that is like, that like, you know, kind of like an anthem of like everything that happened with me too. And then now it's just like, uh, underage sex trafficker for attorney general. Like that actually,

it's got to be real hard for, I mean, for hard for everybody who has any, uh, experience of that type of thing. But like, yeah, that's fucking crazy.

Yeah, for sure. But let's not, do pussy hats this time. Let's do like blade hats. Yeah. Nice. Yeah. Let's wear Oh, like I always think like a big stuffed blade. Yeah, let's not, let's not do this cut. Let's fucking wear spike shoulders. Let's look like we're in the Warriors this time when we start marching. Let's look like we're in the Warriors. Let's have baseball bats and spikes and play. Yeah. And clinking the bottles together and be scary this time. Let's be frightening this time. No, you know what I mean?

Yeah. It's, it's, it's still a musical. Maybe like, maybe like. a west side story. Yeah, we're more of a west side story than a... We're dancing. We're dancing. Yes, we've got nonchucks. We're spinning on. If you wear a pussy hat, it needs to be like,

have like, um, you know, some gush in a mat. Yeah, it needs to be actively frightening to white man. Yeah, yeah. Now, whatever that is to you. Yeah. You know what I mean? Well, pussies are scary to white men, I think, which is why they had the pussy hats in the first place.

But they also try to downplay them and make fun of them. So again, if it is one, it needs to be like, gushing like stuff, like poison blood or something. You know what I mean? And get people in acid or something. It shoots out and like burns their skin. Yeah, that's good. There you go.

So we'll get out there. We're going to get organized. We're going to get organized. Knife hats. Yeah. And goosh and pussy hats. Yeah, yeah. Guys don't worry.

We got this. Everything will be fine. Tazers blades. Today is for grieving. Tomorrow is for knife hats. That dashed. It's knife hats. Dude, let's get fun with it at least and violent with it.

Yeah, let's get fun and violent. Oh, yes. Slice them. We got to get out here, guys. We got to get out of here. Thank you so much for joining us on this week's episode of page 7, everybody. Also, yeah, you could see right here, everything we are all seeing and you're good. Hold on.

Yeah, I said, yeah, I see again. I just want to make sure. As I fashioned my blade hat that gushes blood. Yeah, I don't know why. I forgot that you said you could see again because I was thinking about other things, but maybe it's knife hats. Love you guys so much. Have an amazing Thanksgiving next week. We will have a watch-along popping out for you on Thanksgiving.

But don't forget, come hang out with me and Holden. Twitch.tv slash, oh, no, it's Jackie on Thanksgiving morning, baby. Blah-la-la-la-la-law-law. Get your turkeys up. It is time to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving. Day parade and MJ's going to be joining us and also you got to come hang out with me and MJ when we play The Sims on Wednesdays again, Twitch.tv slash oh no, it's Jackie. You want to hear me other places? I know you fucking do. So go check out LPN Deep Dives. I didn't say that that

Holden said that. Go check out LPN Deep Dives, Crescent City as well as who's the bitch. And don't forget to join us on Monday for our lives. stream of who's the bitch. We would love to hear from you live that is going to be at 6 p.m. Pacific Standard Time on Monday, November 25th. So get your calls out, get your toikies out. Gravy, gravy, where's the gravy? I think it's in my pants. Holden. Nice. Twitch.tv.4 slash Holdenators ho. Check us out on Fridays with Jackie. We are going to be getting crazy, crazier and crazier, drunker and drunker, as time has changed and gone by in new ways.

Chris or, Drunker, Friday, 6PM, B, B, S.E., Holdenor so on Twitch by stream all throughout the week. Tears of a clown and LPN TV on Wednesdays with Jake. Page 7 podcast at gmail.com, please send in your conspiracy theories, please. And page seven podcast on Patreon.

We have so much content going on over there. Weekly bonus episodes, The Leftovers. We have actually a lot of articles. I think we didn't get to this week that we're going to get into. You know, stuff like that. Jackie's Book Club, Buffy at the $10 layer. If you're nasty, still work through that. Patreon.com for slash page 7 podcast.

Holdenaders ho with 2 O's on Instagram. Please, God, it's going to just never, never going to get back to the amount of followers I used to have. But we're going to try. But we're going to try. Keep building. Holdenators ho with 2Os on Instagram. Please follow it right now as you're listening. Just pull out the phone.

Holdenators ho with 2Os. MJ My name is MJ And I'm MJ K L Kat on Instagram Love it, love it Let's sing the song, y'all Y'all Shout

Shout Let it all out These are the emails That you wrote it about Come on We're gonna read them to you Come on Man every once in a while

When I'm sitting here About to record something I just think It's Diveall the River the hell round up. I'm gonna kiss them all. So if it lives in your head rent free, don't worry, it still lives in mine anyway. Jackie, you're not here to talk about Riverdale. You're here to talk about the shoutouts, talk about the shoutouts, and you can send in your own shoutouts to page 7 podcast at gmail.com. We love hearing from you, and I love y'all's love. I love

yourself shoutouts. I love everything about your wrecks, your emails, your photos. All of it puts a smile on my face. And I want to say a forever thank you to all of you guys for listening every week and for sticking by us no matter what, even when we're sad. Guys, we've still got each other. Anyway, again, send in your own shoutouts, page 7 podcast at gmail.com, because this is a beautiful place where you can share celebrations. We can share upsets, but also we can mostly share that we are here for each other no matter what, and I'm sending you all love. Now, my first shoutout, ah, speaking of, you know I love a self shoutout, this first one goes out to Dakota. Thank you so much, Dakota, for sending this in.

And I get you, and I love this opening. Dakota says, it feels pretty weird typing out a shout out to myself. It feels like life should be reserved for mourning and anxiety these days, but that's exactly what the fucking man wants. So here I am, and hell yeah, Dakota, thank you for reminding me and for reminding everybody else out there. That is what the fucking man wants. We refuse to give it to them. We will not surrender. Hell yeah, thank you for celebrating yourself.

Dakota says, a little over a year ago, I was in a very unhappy relationship, living in LA, barely making it work paycheck to paycheck, more and more putting my life and my passion on the back burner for things I didn't want. During that time, I went on a solo camping trip. While there, these worries assaulted me, and I sent a very long, maybe a little emotionally charged email slash plea to this email of all places asking for advice. At the time, I was grappling with the fact that I was dating someone who wanted a different life than me. What I wanted was to move to New York and pursue my music. Well, I'll skip over the year of busting my ass at a shitty job in my hometown and just say that I'm currently writing this email while watching the sunset on the Brooklyn Heights Promenade.

I live in a slightly shitty 7 by 10 windowless room for more money than that's worth, and I have next to no friends in this city with the same shitty job. But I'm, you know. here. I fucking did it. I'm still open to advice. I need to make friends with some musicians ASAP, but I now know I can figure it out. I'm a bit of a yapper or not a great email writer. How dare you say that, Dakota. So I want to close this out with a portion of my favorite poem, Wild Geese by Mary Oliver. Whoever you are, no matter how lonely, the world offers itself to your imagination, calls to you like the wild geese. harsh and exciting over and over announcing your place in the family of things.

Love to you all, love to you, Dakota. Thank you so much for sending this in, and I hope you are, and you know, I know you are. You are currently inspiring other people, and I want to say thank you so much for taking the time to send this in and share this and celebrate yourself, because we don't take the time. Our society tells us not to take the time. that we shouldn't be just sitting there going, hell yeah, me, good for me. But I'm so proud of you, Dakota. I would say my one piece of advice for as someone that has been exactly where you are,

get out there, you will make friends. Jump and the city will catch you. I do feel that way about New York. I think that New York is a magic place that sometimes gives you exactly what you need. And sometimes that is to get the fuck out of New York. And that's okay too. I wish you all the best. Get out there.

Go live. Go see shows. Go stay after the shows. Go to small bars. Go to just go meet people. And the city will be there to greet you. I'm so happy for you, Dakota. You fucking got this shit.

And you are so many steps closer to making your dream a reality. Hell yes. Congratulations. Now I'm moving on to some awesome friend love. Thank you. much Marie Jane for writing in. Marie Jane says, I wanted to give a shout out to my friend Corinne. She's a listener of this podcast, so hopefully she hears this. Corinne is an artist, someone truly dedicated to her work. She's a very talented painter. My favorite work of hers is

a giant painting of Britney Spears with an umbrella. You know when from? Oh yes, I do. She's also a musician. Her band just put out a new album and incredible music video, Y'all should check out. Band is named Natural Velvet. I photographed her wedding about two years ago, and I was truly honored to be asked. When an artist I respect and look up to asks little old me to photograph their big day, Gasp! It's a fucking honor. Oh, and she is incredible style, so of course photographing her wedding was a dream. Anyway, it's her birthday this week, and I wanted to give her a shout out because she's a cool person who deserves it. Check out that video. Again, everybody check out Natural Velvet. Also, did I just pause to look up natural velvet and this is sick as shit? Check out Natural Velvet. Guarantee, I believe that this is

the music video that you were referring to, Marie Jane, but guarantee is awesome. And this is hot as shit, dude. Oh my God, sending so much love to you, Corinne. And congratulations with Natural Velvet. They're also on Spotify, so definitely give them a checkout and say, and her some love. Thank you so much, Marie Jane. I love Marie Jane says, I don't like Taylor Swift, but I love how much Holden does. And now Jackie, sort of. M.J. I love that you are not obsessed with Taylor. We love you so much, Marie Jane. I hope you have an amazing weekend. Oh, my God, Corinne. Happy, happy, happy birthday, Karen. Happy, happy birthday, Karen. You are very, very cool, and I'm very, very scared, but happy, happy birthday, Corinne. I say very scared because I mean that out of respect.

of usually when a person is very cool, I get very scared of them. So that's really where that came from, if you were wondering. Oh, wait, is it Natural Velvet more than Shards? More than Shards? Well, I just stopped and watched all of that, too. So check out More Than Shards as well. Well, you got a new fan, Natural Velvet, and I want to say thank you so much again to Marie Jane for writing in,

and happy birthday, Corinne. And I just want to say, last but not least, you know, I'm always sending love to our chat community because our chat community is unparalleled. But I want to say especially thank you to beautiful slime and the slime. I don't want to say the slime syndicate, just to slime gang. And to everybody else who wrote in telling me about the emperor's new groove and where it was in like in the history of Disney. because now I've got multiple documentaries to check out. But also I want to thank Katie, who wrote in, and a couple of people did write in about this,

that there is a podcast called What Went Wrong? And it's about the making of movies, and apparently they have a great episode on the Emperor's New Groove. And I'm definitely going to check that out, Katie. And I just want to say, again, thank you to everybody. Thanks for just the kind words and just being there and being positive members of a beautiful community. We love you so much.

I guess sometimes when you start talking too much about a community, it sounds like we're a cult. We're not a cult. We just like and love each other, all right? Have a great week. Get through Thanksgiving. We'll get through the holidays. I love you.

We'll be back on the other side. I mean I say that, but we're also going to have a watch along that drops next week. So check that out too. Okay, bye, everybody. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors, you can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.