Page 7 - Episode 142: It'd Sure Be Cool If You Did

Episode Date: November 12, 2015

Jackie, Molly and Marcus gossip about Blake Shelton's new relationship and upcoming Christmas special, Bro-Country music, and Oprah's 2015 Favorite Things list. Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Whenever I'm with you. Didn't you want that in your head? Um, um, I think I recognize that horrible piece of shit song. Welcome to page seven, everyone. I'm Marcus Parks. I'm Jackie Zabrowski. I'm Molly Nethel.

Just heard that song and I was like, man, that's a song I could never hear again. Why do you guys hate her? You know, the thing is, is that I think I just, it's too shmoo-y-loo for me. Yeah. It's a little like, I'm a guy living at a world.

I feel like it's like what. I've been really hating on it lately I mean I always hate on child singing But I just heard this girl the other day Like she was about maybe 11 or 12 And she was singing like this She thought she was the best Singer in the world

And I heard it and I was just like I could cut her face I hate anyone Because also there are adults that sing like that too that think that they're sounding really good and it just makes me so angry. But don't you like the voice? Isn't that all the voices?

Well, I stopped watching the voice because of it. Too much. Yes. It's the girls. It's the little girls that are singing on the voice that I just couldn't fucking take. And they all look the same. But this one's got glasses,

and this one's name is Morky. And you know, I don't even want Morky to win because Morky looks like all the other ones. Man, we got to get rid of this knife. I'm playing. of the knife to touch. Yeah, that's my knife. Every time the knife is out, I play with it.

Got my name on it, and it's mine. I'm waving it around. Who is this Markey? Oh, no, I just named... Oh, no, I just named that. Just a mythical girl who Jackie, a little girl who Jackie hates. Yeah, actually, well, yeah,

the morkey's technically a cross between a Yorkshire terrier and a pure bread maltese. Ew. Yeah, a little marquee. Oh, you say, ooh, but look at that cute little fucker. Yeah. Tell me you wouldn't pull him to your breast

and nuzzle him. I don't know he's too small. He'd probably die in my arms. I'd be like, Morky, why? Morky, you wake up again, Morky. You're not bred to be strong. I hug Morky too hard again. I'm not. Morky, tell he was not leader no more. That's my Lenny impression.

English? Nah. Sure. Well, we got a new relationship of brewing out there. Oh, my God. I have never leapt out of my seat the way I did when I heard this news. This is a weird one. You might not have heard about this one yet, Maui.

Jackie's looking at me so excitedly. I don't think I've heard. Blake Shelton. Okay. And you're going to love this. Gwen Stefan. What? Is that why she left Kevin Rossdale?

Is that why he left Miranda? No, no. Happen very quickly. What? so fast. It's a mash-up inside a relationship. It is a mash-up. What I'm looking forward to is the Christmas

album. There has to be a Christmas album. Something has to come of this. Some kind of disgusting Frankenstein's monster has to come out of this relationship. Oh, yeah. I love it. All I know is that they were holding hands at a CMA party in Nashville last week.

As TMZ said, they let their fingers do the talking. Ew. Oh, gross. What are they just like pulsating hands pulsating against each other? Well, to be fair, as I teach middle schoolers, you can make it holding hands pretty charged when you have no other outlet with which to express your affection. You're just like, oh, yeah. That's so gross.

It is gross. It's a fact of life, Jackie. Yeah, I know. We all did it. Yeah, we did. Just sweat into the palm of another person's hand and get really happy about it. Yeah, I mean, it's as close to sex as they can do. I just think it's interesting.

Because she's so much more meth and he's so booze. You know, and I think that's a song they could write. I'm so meth and I'm so booze. Come on over here, girl. Give me the nose. Let's tell you a little something about their habits as far as that goes. Their habits. There was a picture of them.

That's how we know they were holding hands in Nashville. She's got a glass of white wine. he's drinking booze out of a star phone cook. Of course he is. That's why I love him so much. And if you look at this picture right here, you might think maybe he's the one that's a little bit meth. Yeah, he's looking puffy and sweaty and red.

It's just the booze. And his eyes are not looking, let's say, human? No, they just don't have the same sparkle. He just has a little bit of a beer hood over his face. That's all, guys. He's looking a little snaky. He doesn't have a prohomple. He doesn't look snake.

Does it look sneaky? He is not handsome in that photograph. No, he's not. But usually, oh, my God, I just want him to be my daddy boyfriend. He's kind of plain. He's a plane. I know. I think that's why I feel like I could get him.

He's like a plain dad. I got drunk enough and be like, you're the sexist man ever men. He'd be like, well, all right, I guess, you know. And I feel like it would just be mostly, like, him heavy breathing and kind of, like, spit coming out of his mouth and just, like, heavy petting over me. my clothes. And I'd be like, okay, can we just can we stop this and just keep going? Can we like take anybody like, nah, heavy petting is my favorite part.

Because heavy petting is one of the most disgusting ways to describe anything sexual. Heavy petting. Heavy petting. It feels like, as you mentioned, Lenny earlier, it feels like Lenny's sex move. He heavy pets. Who's Lenny?

From mice and men. Oh, yeah, heavy petting. Yep, you're correct. And TMZ. asked Gwen Stefani's people if she was worried she was going to run to Miranda Lambert down at that CMA party and they said she doesn't care if Miranda's there or not

well she's like I mean she's hot to trot she's super hot to trot I'm sorry I think that that what's his name Blake Shelton was a step up downgrade well in class yes but in coolness and popularity I feel like it's an upgrade from Miranda Lambert to Gwen Stefani oh yes No, no, no. I would say it's a downgrade for Gwen Stefani to go from Gavin.

Oh, definitely. Yeah, yeah. Blake Shelton's coming out on top on this one for God damn sure. Yeah, he got lucky. Oh, yeah, because you know, Miranda Lampert probably approved. Because she's too much of a southern princess, and that's fine. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but you know, the woman's got class. Gwen Stefani threw out her class when she sang that Moulon Rouge song.

And that's when she really went downhill. But I love Gwen Stefani. Yeah, I like that she's so trashy. I like her trashiness. I like her style. I like her voice, all right. You know, I think she's fun. Man, I just now I have to watch the voice again.

I had dropped it and now I have to watch it again. Tanya Gwen Stefani guaranteed bathroom blowjobs. Yeah. Yeah. None of those from Miranda. Oh, no, no, no. And probably in dirtier bars, too. Yeah.

Dive bars. Yeah, dive bars. Man, you know, punk, I mean, not that no doubt can be exactly described as punk, But punk and Scott New Wave. New Wave, Scott, I'd say. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And Country have a, I feel like that actually could make for quite a great musical marriage, you know. Being a drummer in a country band that has a lot of punk influences, the beats and chords are pretty much the same.

Yeah. There's really not that much difference between the two. And, of course, Rockabilly came out of country. And, of course, Rockabilly eventually led to punk rock. Marcus's Music Corner That's what that was I was like I feel like there's a connection

there. Rockabilly is it? Punks and country people getting together. I see a lot of potential in this relationship. With a sex tape at. With a sex tape at. There has to be a sex tape. There's going to be something.

That kind of trash class getting together. They got so much funny. But she's got those kids. The thing is I bet he's really good with kids. Does he have kids? No. You're sure about it. Yeah, because they only have, well, at least not with Miranda Lamper.

Because they had all those horses and all those dogs and all those animals. Yeah. But I don't think they were ever honestly around each other enough. They always wanted kids, but I don't think it ever happened. No, he doesn't have any kids, but he is hosting the 2016 Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards. Ew. He said, I want to get slime. That is not the choice to host that.

Why would they ever choose him? A Puffy Red drunk. What kids know him? I don't understand. Why would they ever choose him? No, I don't think that. Selena Gomez. Yeah.

Get a Taylor Swift. Yeah. I mean, I don't understand. You know who's a little dubious about it? Kathy Lee and Hoda. Oh, I know. Because he announced it on Kathy Lee and Hoda show and they're like, are you really doing that?

Oh, my God. Just because they both, of course, they want to fucking Eiffel Tower of the shit out of them. But I guess they couldn't. They'd have to use strap-ons, but I bet they'd figure it out. Well, I think that maybe they, as people who are public drunks, maybe they have like a kind of...

Are you talking about us? Are you talking about that? Kathy Lee and Hoda. Maybe they have like a bit of a like close eye on their fellow public drunk and they're like, he is too drunk to host a children's show and it's like a thou dost protest too much situation. Yeah, I guess. That's true. You know? I think that's why I like him so much. But my real question is, Marcus, is there any word out about another Blake Shelton family Christmas special coming out?

because I got to say that was a lot of fun. Did you watch it? Of course I watched it. I watched it my mom. We're singing the songs. He's drunk. He is obviously drunk on it. Are you talking about Blake Shelton's Not So Family Christmas?

I'm sorry. Oh, not so family. Not so family. Excuse me. No kids. Uh-oh, no kids, just horses. This holiday season, Blake Shelton's not-so-family Christmas special returns This is the country music superstar and coach of the voice

hosts a one hour of celebration featuring live musical performances of Christmas favorites. Hilarious skits. Oh, long list of celebrity appearances. Last year's show included Christina Aguilera, Kelly Clarks, Miranda, Lambert. Probably not this time. Liva McIntyre, Larry the Cable Guy. Oh, man, Larry the Cable Guy.

He was in a skit. He was in a skit. And Jay Leno. this season's special provost is even more stars and bigger surprises. There is one. Don't miss out on the Christmas fun as Blake Chudden celebrates his favorite holiday with all his favorite friends. Yay! I wonder if Gwen Stefani's going to be in it because I think they do it live.

When is, look at him old at the Christmas tree. Oh, he is so plain. He's holding a Christmas in the promo photo. He is the plainest man. Look at his boring face. Yeah, I think they had to say that Miranda Lambert was on it last year. Even though I'm sure the PR people read it and say, like, should we really say that?

And NBC's like, we have to say it. Yeah, we have to say awkward if you erase her from history. Yes. You can't retcon Miranda Lambert. You have to keep her in there. But Molly, I'm just surprised at you because you know what? Sometimes it's the heart of someone

that someone is attracted to and not just their face. That's true, but I've never heard a single one of his songs. They are all bad. All right, every single thing that Blake Shelton makes is a piece of garbage. But it's so funny because it is such a piece of garbage that people love it so much

because it's like Morant Lamper, classy. Also, her songs are perfect for what they are. They are made to be that way. And so is Blake Shelton's. But his are such a trashy caliber. It is a, I would liken everything he creates to someone having, drinking half a can of Coors Light and putting it in the fridge and saving it for the next night.

And it's like that half a can that you pull out. And that's everything he touches. All right, I do love that. I love that lot. I mean, he is just so, I don't know why. I don't know why. Because he's not even that attractive. You're right.

But you love, you love that. I love him. Yeah. He's not really bro country, right? He's not like frat country. Like, going down to get my frat boy gone. And we're going to have a rod on time on the row. And there's going to be some mudd in.

Some of his music is like that. Because it's going to be some muddy. Gotta be a money. If we're going down, have a time. All my friends gonna get that right. Oh, yeah. Here we go now. Getting all women gonna go through the money.

It's truck commercial country. Yeah. Who is an artist who sings that way? Because what you're singing sounds painfully familiar. Jason Aldeen. Jason Aldeen. But Blake Shelton does have a few of those songs. Yeah, Blake Shelton.

But Jason Aldeen is like the reigning king. And by the way, Jason Aldine is about to be in a little bit of a shitstorm because he got a little bit in the blackface trap this year. Wow, what did he do? That's not even a trap you can fall in anymore. You just don't do it. Yeah, no, it is a hole that has been paved over. You don't do it. You just can't do it.

Even sometimes I'm like, maybe I could put darker men. No, I can't do it. No, the trap is people's friends telling him, yeah, it'll be fine. Get out that jackhammer and fucking get into the hole. We covered it years ago, but just get it in it. Was it for Halloween? It was for Halloween, and he decided he win his Little Wayne. Nope.

Absolutely not. Whatever your name is. Do it. You can't do it. And he is whitest of the whites. Yeah, Jason Alde. Jason Aldean. Jason Aldean.

Didn't he sing a song about Red Solo Cups? I think so. I don't know if that was him, but I know there's a song about the... Doesn't he also have a line at Yankee Candle? Was that Jason Aldeen? Does Jason Aldine have a Yankee candle? That's not very truck country if you ask me. No, no, no, but it's good for the women?

I actually think Blake, it was Luke Bryan. Luke Brian. He had the Yankee candle. Now Jason Aldine, his songs are burning it down to not looks good on you. He's not train. Just getting started. She's country. Dirt Road Anthem.

and when she says baby. She does, she's, it's god tree. La, la, la, la, la, I mean a wow. Yeah, it's, But it's like, let's like really get into the meat of it right now. I'm accurate. We were at Jackie's apartment, a couple last Thursday. And Doug, who's, you know, her boyfriend, also in the common with me,

decided to give us a little bit. bit of a tour through modern bro country. Just to let everyone know what was going on. Just to let everyone know what was going on. And we figured out that it's an entire genre of music that comes entirely from Kid Rock's song, Cowboy. Yes. I'm a cowboy, baby. I mean, that's a fun song.

Because she's country, baby. It's every song, the every hit country song over the last 10, 15 years has all been coming straight from Cowboy by Kidboy. Yeah, but not the song. it sure be cool if you did by Blake Shelton Sure be cool if you did He's pressuring a woman for sex No, he's like, you don't have to throw back your pretty pink Lemonade Shooter and lean a little closer

He's talking about basically a 20-year-old Drinking shitty drinks at a bar And he's like, but you don't have to leave with me But sure be cool if you did I hate him I was gonna keep it real life Like, chill, like only have a drink or two, but it turned into a party when I started talking to you. Now you're standing in the neon looking like a high I want to be on.

Baby, it's your call, no pressure at all. You don't have to throw back your pretty pink lemonade shooter and lean a little closer. You don't have to keep on smiling that smile that's driving me wild. And when the night is almost over, meet me in the middle of a moonlit Chevy bench seat. Oh, my God, I'm sick. And do a little bit of country songs. Hang it on. You don't have to keep me following like this,

but it sure be cool if you did. Yeah, do it in the serial killer boys. Yeah, that's also, that's like capital douche guy being like, we don't have to leave with me, but it would be really cool if you did. I mean, it's better than rape, Molly, isn't it? He's allowing her to choose. Yeah, it's like, it'd be cool. I mean, you don't have to.

I mean, it would be cool if you did. Like, shut up. Shut up. I don't know if I want. I don't know if I should be cool if you do. I don't know. I guess it would be cool if I did. I said it would be cool.

I feel like you got to imagine just a girl being like, I'm not really interested. And then he just stands next to her and sings the entirety of the three and a half-minute song. And she's like, I'm really just hanging out on my friends. You can't shoot me dead because you've already knocked me dead. I'll just be waiting in my Chevy trunk. The bench seat in the moonlight. Molly, Moonlight.

I'll just be waiting out in my car. If you want to come, I know you're having a good time with your friends and everything. And I don't want to take you, you know, like, I don't want to take you away from that or nothing. So, like, when you're ready to go, I'll be, like, out. Because I'm out of money and they won't let me stay in here if I have any money. So you don't have to come home with me, but it sure would be cool if you did. I'll just be waiting in the car right next to your car. So no worries or whatever.

No pressure. But, you know, I'm just going to wait until you. you leave before I leave. But also, you know what? I'd go. It's just too much of a fight. I feel like I've all been in that situation where it's like, you know what? I don't even like, fine. Fine. Fine. I'll do it. It's fine. It'd be cool. Okay, well, I guess everyone's going to be cool.

All right. I guess I'm a cool girl. Who's the cool girl? Look at this girl. I'm the cool girl. And guys, I found a cool girl. She's going home with me tonight. I got to get into the lemonade shooter bird. Put the Vidka in it. Is it called Vedka? I didn't even know the lemon.

What is a lemonade shooter? Ooh, I've had something called the lemon drop before. The lemon drop is the... Great. It's the people that consume... Not that I am judging all the people, but the people I specifically drank lemon drops with were the people that drink lemon drops.

Yes, yes, yes. Vegan girls that were all ex-erority girls and they were all just like, oh me yeah you're so funny we're going to get lemon drops lemon drops and I was like I guess I found a website the website for 929 the bull number one for new country in Yakima Hell yeah yeah comea I think it's in Wyoming

Yeah yeah yeah yeah sure yeah yeah yeah yeah sounds like the keyboards Yakima is in Washington. Interesting. Yeah, and they've got an honor of the song. They've got a little recipe for a pink lemonade shooter over here. You got one ounce absolute citron vodka. On the radio station website. It's your cocktail side of the website.

One ounce absolute centrode vodka. One ounce cranberry juice. One out sweet and sour mix. Combined ingredients in a cocktail shaker with ice and strain into a chilled cocktail glass with pink sugar on the rim. Ew. It's the sweet sour mix That's where I draw the line

You don't like the sweet sour mix? No, it gives me headaches. I can't deal with that. I'm not a Rita girl. I want to be a Rita girl, but I'll never be a Rita girl. You're a Jizzy girl. You're not a Rita, you're a jizzy. I'm a jizzy, baby. So why don't you kill me? All right, it's time for the list.

Oh, who's on the list? My guess. Gotta have that list. They didn't even talk about sex in the city, but I guess I'll do that later. Yeah, the sex in the city will be around. But it's timely, Marcus. It's been around, it'll be around. Nobody cares what I just finished it.

I have nobody to talk to about it. I care. I care. I am bursting on the inside. It's been around, it'll be around. We'll be fine. We're going to talk about it. Don't think you're going to fucking get away from it. You're just saying that because you haven't seen it yet.

Yet. Yet? Yet. Yes. Okay, fine. Yet. We'll leave it at yet. I cried through the last four episodes.

But, all right, we'll get some of us. You know what just came out? Oprah's list of favorite things for 2015. No, please don't bring the... Oh, no. What? Why are you and I opposite day? Because the thing is, is that I love Oprah's favorite things, but I had to painstakingly go through each one of them

because Doug decided that Oprah's favorite things was something that I should love. She's never done this before, has she? Have you seen the picture of her on the front of the Oprah's favorite things? Every year. For a year, she does a photo shoot with a bunch of weird guys dressed up as nutcrackers. That's very disturbing men dressed as nutcrackers. Oh, you're not talking about you.

You haven't seen the video. No, I haven't seen the video. There's a video. Oh, dear Lord. Don't worry about the video right now. Let's go through some of these things because it is fun. There's a $425 bag from skits. Wait, what skits?

It's a Providence Shoulder Bag Company, $425. It's the perfect combo, pretty impractical. Is it made out of gold? Why is it $425? I think so that's affordable for a shoulder bag. Never mind that. From skits? From skits.

From skits, that's pretty reasonable. Throw a coach on it. I know what that means. Get a Michael Kors. I even know what that means. You can get a box of flowers from High Camp Vine and Bloom for only $189. See, that's the problem in Open's favorite things, is that she can go from eating 20 pounds of macaroni and cheese

and then go spend $425 on a skitsback. Or $49 on salt. I mean, is it Hilairene? Is it a Hummelian salt? Because I'll pay everything I own for Himalayan Salt. Yeah? You like Himalayan Salt? Sure. It's Thomas Heller's ad hoc salt seller.

Thomas Edison? Thomas Keller's ad hoc. It's a set of three finishing salts housed in a three-level bamboo box, one for fish, one for meat, one for veggies. Listen, I love salt. Bamboo box. Can I put the meat salt on something else and will it taste like meat? No, it's only for meat, Molly. You can give me that one.

I want it, though. I want meat flavored salt. As we establish, like, those bacon bits. The bacon bits. Artificial meat flavor, give it to me. Give it to me in salt form. Interesting. Maybe you would be interested in these $49 salt.

Yeah. Or maybe you would be interested in a pair of $195-dollar vince sweatpants. I like sweatpants. The sweatpants is when I got upset. That is actually when I was like I got actually upset Because I doubt Oprah wear sweatpants I'm gonna throw that out there

She says she lives in them I know she says she lives in them You don't think what she wear at home Nothing I think she wears nothing but a big lobster bib She's going Goodman ball She just sits on a bunch of pillows

And her breast sweat Drops down her chest And it's like I'm not you know I'm a big girl too But you know it's just the dress she was wearing is unflattering. I can't believe. I mean, I know she's an entrepreneur.

I love Oprah. I do. But $149 for sweatpants? Yeah, no. But we're a different caliber. That's the problem. They're probably really comfortable. I'm sure that they are very comfortable.

But at the same time, it's like, I guess it's all along the same lines of, like, her books, like her Oprah's reading list, where it is marketed towards moms, and I get that. But $149 for sweatpants? What moms are? I mean, my mom can't afford that. Right, right. It's tone deaf of her. It's tone deaf.

Well, yeah, especially when she's recommended $125, $120 for five chocolates. They're designed to look like spiritual totems. What does that mean? Like a totem bowl, like an eagle? Spiritual totems. What kind of spiritual totems? Eagles. Or, oh, like the Virgin Mary, the Jewish chamsa?

Wait a second. So there is a Virgin Mary chocolate that you can buy. It's wrapped in a ribbon. Are you allowed to eat it? Can you eat a Virgin Mary chocolate? Yeah, you can eat anything. Is it filled with wine? See, that's the kind of chocolate, Virgin Mary chocolate.

$200 wine. Yeah, it's like filled with Jesus's blood. The blood of Jesus. Yeah, and that's like a, is it dark chocolate at least? I don't know. It just is a beautiful, complete set of our five most popular icons, all wrapped in a ribbon and shipped to your door. So it's an eagle and it's the Virgin Mary.

It's an eagle and it's a Virgin Mary. Mary, yeah. Listen, put it on your sweatpants, eat five chocolates, it'll only set you back about $300. You know, the thing is that if I had the money, I would buy these things. Yeah. You think you would? Yeah, and I would take a bunch of pictures of me just like licking the face of the Virgin Mary. Like, how virgin is she?

Licking it so that nobody else can have it. Give it to Henry and then lick all five of them. That's a great idea. You know what? That's actually a really good idea because it's hard to buy the man that has everything, something for Christmas. Maybe I should buy him everything on Oprah's. list.

Everything. Buy him that $600 set of cookware. Well, you could afford the salt? I could afford the salt. I'll buy him the finishing salts and the bamboo set. Put me on QVC. I can sell anything. Or it's type of blind dyed on.

Yay! We can't see you. We just have one today, but it's a juicy one. This top film actor is really mad. And a mostly television actress who has been talking about him lately. Some of his gang have launched attacks on her credibility, but she hadn't afraid of them since she isn't. Since he isn't having any success hurting her, he's got a new strategy.

In addition to discrediting and attacking the TV actress, he's going to attack a close friend of hers. The friend is a performer woman, who is a bigger star than our TV actress. The actor thinks by going after her, he'll get the TV actress to shut up. We don't know what dirt he has on the performer. But if you hear negative things about her on the near future, you'll know who's responsible. It's totally not Leah Ramini, Tom Cruise, and J-Lo, is. It is absolutely. Oh my God.

I got lost. I was like, who is it? You are, that's very clear. What do you say? God, that's crazy. Yeah, yeah. He was just talking about that shit. We was.

What were they going to do about J-Lo? Is it going to be about her kid with the glasses? It probably is going to have something to do with the kid with the glasses. Maybe she was drinking during the pregnancy. No, J-Lo. I mean, I'd imagine the Scientologist have a lot of dirt on other saliseless. They have to. They have to.

Oh, interesting. Because when they do the audits, of course, the Scientologists talk about the things that they've done. And I'm sure some of the things they've done have been with non-Scientologists. So these people have files on everybody. I bet they got a file on Henry. In fact, I know they have a file on Henry. Interesting. Because especially with Leah Romani when she was in it, which I'm on my brain anyway,

because they were just playing King of Queens in my Uber cab. But on DVD You said that was such a little smile on your face There was a DVD player And he was playing King of Queens So I thought that was fun That's really fun Everybody tolerates King of Queens

I love King I mean you know I love King of Queens And I tried to talk to him about King of Queens He knew nothing about it I said where'd you get the DVD from He goes I don't know I was like all right You just found it Somebody left it in the car

I don't know but he had a whole DVDs He had the whole thing Anyway Like all eight seasons of King of Queens I wanted to call him out as a liar Because it was like you have to know It's playing back here It was like where'd you get?

And he's just kept saying I don't know And I just don't believe him I don't know I definitely don't believe him Yeah no it's like when you're like Oh no I haven't watched Full House in years And then you can quote exactly

What happens in the episode Did you see the montage Of Stephanie dancing at the telethon To Hotline Bling? No but I love all of the Hotline Bling memes It's pretty great. Have you looked up all of the lyrics hotline, blink? Because I've watched the lyric video many times, and now I know, you know what, Drake's just the bad guy in this.

Drake is a bad in general. The whole thing is about, he's like, oh, I had this girl. I used to fuck her at night, and that's it. And then I left town, and I came back, and now she's fucking other people. Drake's just trying to sound tough. He's not tough at all with his dad sweater. He's trying to sound tough. And he can't dance.

Drake knew exactly what he was. doing with this whole thing. He knew exactly. Everyone talking about him. Everyone listening to the song. Everybody's talking about him. Everyone's buying the song. He knew what he was doing.

He knew exactly what he was doing. He knew exactly what he was doing. Oh, yeah, yeah. Drake is very... I think his people knew what they were doing. He's very... You think Drake was a pun. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I don't think he has anything to do with that. He's a dumbo-dumbo. He's a dumbbo. He ain't got... He's got big ears. He's a dumber. I don't know. I've got an assistant here at Cave Comedy Radio, who is one of, quote unquote, the kids, she's young.

What does that mean? The kids? The kids. Your kids? No, no, no. She's a youth. She's a youth. Oh, okay.

Yeah, yeah, she's one of the youths, you know? She's a youth. And she's a youth. And so she told me that Drake is very meme conscious. And he knew that he would turn into one of the meme things. That sounds like dumb. That sounds so idiotic. Welcome to.

2015, Jackie. What about Adele and the flip phone in the goddamn music video? You don't think she did that on purpose? Oh, yeah, she did that on purpose. She had a flip phone. Because she's meme conscious. She's not meme conscious.

Adele is not meme conscious. She doesn't want, she's against it. She broke records coming back. Oh, my God. Meme conscious. Meme conscious. I hate... I hope that even if he's meme conscious,

I hope that these are all too humiliating for him to handle for his little fragile ego to handle because I just don't care for him And I think that all of the memes are so funny. And I want him to feel... You can't throw. I just want him to be sitting at home being like, stop him.

Quit him. Yeah. And I wish I was still in a wheelchair like Jimmy. Man, that... Where is that? I want that GIF to come out. Where's that gift? Drake Wheelchair Giff.

Well, Drake Wheelchair. DeGrasy. Yeah, when he got shot in the... DeGrasy. In the, yeah, in the school shooting. Yeah. It's like, that should be the GIF. That's all...

Is it GIF? Here's a giff. Here's a giff of him rapping while in the wheelchair. Yeah, because everyone loved him after he was in the wheelchair. And everybody loved him before he was in the wheelchair. And you know, that's not how life is, Degroasi. You didn't start it from the bottom, Drake. You started from Degrazi.

Mm-hmm. And that's all we unfortunately have time. Started from the end of Gorset, now I won't stop being here. It's the way it goes. I don't know how I'm at. Yeah, I think Alan, Alvin and the chipmunks should redo it. Ooh. I hate Albin in the chip house!

We all hate Alvin in the chip hugs. We'll talk about it more next week on page 7. We'll be back. And thank you very much for listen. And we'll talk to you soon. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to cavecomedyradio.com.