Page 7 - Episode 202: The Decade of Us

Episode Date: May 10, 2017

Marcus, Jackie and Molly talk about the first few episodes of The Handmaid's Tale, list actors who peaked in the 90's but might deserve a comeback, and gossip about which celebs wore diapers at the Met Gala. Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Meet me at the crossroads, so you won't be lonely. Meet me at the crossroads, so you won't be lonely. Meet me at the crossroads. You won't be lonely. Meet me at the crossroads. You won't be lonely. I'm going to miss everybody. I'm going to miss everybody. I'm going to miss everybody. I'm going to miss everybody. I was listening to some bone thugs in harmony earlier. And by listening to Bone Thugs and Harmony, I mean, I was listening to that song.

Oh, you weren't listening to the first of the month. You weren't getting on some thuggish-ruggish, No, you know, I can't get into all the other. They all sound like that song. And I love that song. Well, because it started with, you know, the breakdown song, Mariah Carey, which I've talked about on here. And I heard that song.

I was like, fuck, I love the song. Welcome page seven, everybody. Wait, real quick, while we're in that era, do you guys remember the song slash if we talked about it, the one with Coolio that goes, I'll see you when you get there. Oh, yeah. See you when you get there. I got about see you when you get there. That's a good song, man.

I probably know that song. You'll recognize it. It's good. And I thought of it like two years ago when that very nice song about from Fast and Furious Seven came out that was like, It's been a long day without you, my friend. Are they talking about Paul Walker? Yeah. Paul Walker is dead and I can't get into a car again.

But around the time of like emotional mid-90s hip-hop. was Bone Thugs in Harmony, of course, and then also, Cule O.C. when you get there. This is the song. I believe I can reach, but your mind ain't really. It made me feel so cool.

Hell yeah. Oh, my God. This is going to be the summer jam, baby. 2017. I'll see you when you get there. I can't sing this. Oh, yeah, that's right. And it was from a movie.

with Martin Lawrence and Tim Robbins. Really? That is from the soundtrack of that movie. That wasn't the silly like one's rich and one's poor and they switch places. It's called Nothing to Lose. No, it's not that.

That's a jail one, right? Advertising executive Nick Beam learns that his wife is sleeping with his employer. In a state of despair, he encounters a bumbling thief who's attempted carjacking goes awry

when Nick takes him an involuntary joyride. Soon, the betrayed businessman and the incompetent crook strike up a partnership and develop a robbery revenge scheme, but it turns out that some other criminals in the area don't appreciate the competition. What? Wait, I'll see you when you get there is from this silly... I'll see you when you get there.

Meanwhile, I thought that that was like a poignant song written about a friend or something. Yeah, I mean, it is because... For Cooleo, I'm sure it is. I was watching a little bit of the video, and it intersperses these super serious scenes of, like, a father, like, beating a son with Martin Lawrence walking away from Tim Robbins and Tim Robbins crying. Really?

Yeah. And then it cuts to Culeo, like, standing on a cliff in a white suit. Yeah, that's what I remember, the white suit. I had no idea that Tim Robbins and Martin Lawrence were involved. Wow. Although basically the problem is that I find it to be an extremely catchy song And once I start singing it I can't stop

You can never never stop Very emotional I really feel for Culeo's Whoever he's singing about maybe a father and a son I thought it was about a friend It's really maybe one of those songs where you can project Whatever emotions you're going through onto it It's love bringing in like the gospel choir Yeah I like a hip-hop song with a gospel choir

It is nice It's a very catchy sign. I had completely forgotten about that. Mel Brooks is in the movie I'm thinking of. God damn it. Henry. But Mel Brooks and who? I don't remember.

I know that we watched a bunch of your kids. I don't know why I'm just thinking about it right now. Mel Brooks and who else was in it? A person. And they switched places. And he's a millionaire. Then he switched places with like a homeless person? Brewster's millions?

Mm-mm. Uh-uh. Henry. My problem is I've gotten so used in my life. If I have any question about anything like this, I text Henry, and he immediately knows what I'm talking about. Life stinks. Life stinks.

It's life stinks. Thank you, Marcus. I'll have to type in was Mel Brooks Switch Places movie. I mean, yeah, I guess I could Google, but it's always fun to immediately alert him and be like, ASAP, tell me, what is this movie? And he usually will jump on it. Sometimes he'll text, you won't text me back for days,

But if it's something like that, he will immediately get back to me. That's what brothers are supposed to do. Ignore you, except when they can show off their trivia. Life stinks. I don't think it was a good movie, but I watched it all the time. You know, I got fairly good reviews, 6.7 out of 10. It was a weird one. Yeah.

It was one of those ones that was on HBO all the time. There was a lot of them. Jeffrey Tambor was in it. Yes, he was. I love Jeffrey Tambor. Scientologist, though. What? They said that he was.

and he got out. What, really? Damn, everybody's a Scientologist. He said that he denied it. I was reading something because that's how I found out Elizabeth Moss was a Scientologist. Segway.

Oh, yeah. Elizabeth Moss is a huge Scientologist. Well, we talked about her in the blind items last week. Yeah. It's like the handmade sales. Like now I decided I made a literary decision.

Thank you very much. Thank you. It's because I finished the husband's secret and I finished her and went, no, what? Good ending. Isn't it good? It's a good ending.

It's a fun, it's a summary. She's got like nine other books if you're a good. Dude, and I'm going to go, I'm going to go through them, but I wanted to read The Handmaid's Tale because apparently this is a book people read in high school. Yeah. I had another name, but it's forbidden now. So many things are forbidden now.

Scientology. I know this must feel. I want to see the show. I just started it last night. But I wanted to read it first because I felt like I needed to. What you used to. And he's real fucked up. It's very...

My name is offered. And I intend to survive. Yikes. The Handmaid's Tale. A new Hulu, original series, April 26th. I told my mom, I was talking to my mom on the phone. I just started reading Handmaid's Tale. And then she immediately ruined, like, three things before me, like, in one sentence.

And I was just like, why would you say it? She's like, because that's what everybody knows about the book. And I was like, I haven't read the book yet. Mother! I read it in college. Everybody's read it. I don't think, I mean, I know that it's on a bunch of band book list. Now that I'm reading this thing, it's like, the commander's juices ran down my legs.

It's like high schoolers reading this? I mean, I read a bunch of raunchy fucking shit, but I don't want to talk to an English teacher about it in high school. Jackie, tell me more about the juices. What I really thought that the juices represented was her lost past life. Water imagery. I had an English teacher where everything was water. imagery. Every single, we only read books and died about water imagery. It made no fucking sense. Did you read The Awakening? No, we didn't even read books about water imagery. We'd read

fucking Charles Dickens. We would read like, like, the awakening has like the most well-known water imagery in all of literature. It's all water imagery. I think she was, I think that she just knew about, she was trying to teach us about imagery and maybe she only knew how to identify water imagery or we only took her, it was probably us. We only took her, we only took her lesson on water imagery to mean we should just identify water imagery in all the books like Taylor Tatee's cities Is that the same teacher that you had with

Commander's juices? No, I read, I didn't read Hammade Stilt till I was in college and I took a class called Feminist Utopias. And that we read a lot of Octavia Butler and then we also read dystopias which is of course the Handmaid's Dale and I'm realizing that I was, even as a college

student, I think I was too young and self-absorbed to really understand it. I remember liking it, But I was like thinking the entire feminist utopies class, I was just thinking about my own life. I wasn't really like understanding like the themes of like why would people write books where there are like only women and you create like a world where you imagine an alternative future. I feel the same thing about my literature of the fantastic class in college. Like you were just like on a different level. Do you mean like fantasms?

Like fantasy and science fiction. Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm sure, yeah, you thought above and beyond him. It's like, what would I do if I were the superhero in this situation? Yeah, it didn't quite work out. Yeah, you know, but it's fun, though. And you talk about it. Yeah, I mean, so I remember the Handmaid's Tale,

enough that I remember I first started thinking about the Handmaidstil a lot around 2010 and all of the mandatory transvaginal ultrasound bills that were happening. I'm not trying to get political, I'm just saying. We looked, we almost yelled toilet flush. It was very close. I mean, we are talking about the handmageal ultrasound bills. Meadsdale, so it is a whole, you know.

It's a whole thing. It's a whole thing. A lot of transvaginal stuff going. I don't know. I don't know. My vagina is getting on a train and it's going somewhere. It's transvaginal. It's hard. It's hard not to talk about the headmaid's tail without veering wildly into toilet

flesh territory because it is a deeply political book. It is. But all I kept thinking it was like, damn, she must be hot. She got all them robes on. She got that big hat on. It's like, let your hair down, bitch Do you think that when you see like Amish people also? Yeah, oh yeah, and the fact that they can't use zippers.

Yeah. I even look at the girls when the girls, they got the pants on, and they only got the buttons and they got no zippers. How? How? Those kindergartners must be peeing themselves all the time. I would get my fupa stuck in him. I love the word. Like that? Yeah, you're like squawk. Scrake. I'm like, no, not the hairs. But I think you have to wear underwear if you're wearing one of those kind of things. Do you often wear jeans with no underwear? Sure.

I like the way the seam feels on my own human seam. Okay, I can't contain myself anymore. I have to give you guys a blind item right now. Okay. Because it has a lot to do with what you're talking about right now. Okay, seams? A lot.

Well, underwear's and boopas and what goes? On underneath. We've got a Hoopa blind item. What? Fupa comes up on the head. I don't know about Fupa specifically, but it's all, it's about that area and clothes. It's from the Met Gala. Oh, yeah.

There can't be a whole lot of underpants going on in the Met Gala. Listen to this. Several of the lady guests at Met Ball were wearing diapers. What? The glamorous attendees of the person. The glamorous attendees of the prestigious Met Gala in New York City are desperate to keep a very dirty little secret under wraps. Looking great at all costs is the number one priority for celebrities attending the Oscars of Fashion and A-List stars don't mind if one of those costs is being unable to go to the bathroom, explained one well-heeled attendee. Several of the lady guests are wearing diapers.

Literally, you cannot pee in those dresses, and it's a very long night. It's an open bar, and even though the drinks are free, everyone is careful. how much liquids they consume and forget about anyone eating. That's so dumb. Yeah. I want to be drinking that much. No, hell, no. You put a zipper in it.

Or you get one of those, what are they called, the pee-pee-pee-pee-wee-wee? Trucker buddy? Trucker buddy? Yeah, trucker's buddy. I think there's a dumber name, but I know they're all dumb names for them. But Trucker's buddy is disgusting. Stadium friend is one of them. I like it.

For people who don't want to leave their ball name. Put a straw up in there. I would do anything Or just piss through the costume I would rather I know the whole event is about looking good But I would rather eat that food And drink that open bar

And wear a different outfit I understand the not eating the food I probably wouldn't eat the food either You don't want to have a bulge Underneath all you sequins What I don't understand is how do they Hide the Dipeys? There's so many of them

It's like they love the lamb and they And wear them dipeies Yeah their asses are on display Well, they probably have custom-made diapies. Cool. Cotour diapies. Like really absorbent panty liners. But if you're not wearing underwear, how are you even going to, where are you going to, you're going to glue it right to your vaj?

You know, I just, I don't even think there's so many things in my life that I find so trashy and disgusting. But like sitting in my own wet, I don't think I can do. With how much I drink and how much I wet. Standing in your own wet. Standing in your own wet, leaning in your own wet. Walking. Walking in your own wet. You imagine how much rashy.

Hugging hot people in your own wet. Can you imagine just meeting, you know, fucking Rihanna and be like, I'm in a pile of my own urine right now? I'm wet right now, not in a fun way. Because diapers can't be that absorbent. I mean, babies cry when they wet their diaper because they don't want to sit in it anymore. No, and like young girls using sanitary pads. Like, I don't understand them. It's like, can't you just teach them from one of the ten they start shooting?

shove it up there. Oh, it took me a while to learn. Man, it's just scary. A lot of trial and error. Oh, yeah, of course. Everyone's got all the trial and error. But that makes it so much worse. Yeah.

Well, of course, we can't show you pictures here on page 7. If you want to see some of the dresses we're about to talk about, you can Google MetGala 2017. But I've got examples in this blind item of the women who were supposedly wearing diapers. Really? And I'm going to show the two of you, the pictures. And you can let me know whether or not you, think these are dipey or no dipe? What do we call this segment?

Dipe or none? Yeah. How wet are they? And how sad are they? Wet and sad. Wet and sad. All right. The first one is Rihanna.

Definitely dippy. That was the first one I thought of. It was a dipey all the way. Yeah, you can hide a dip in there, no problem. Jackie, describe that dress. So I would say it's like she wrapped herself in a bunch of intestines that had actually been seat. So like she's an unconsure meat.

at this point. There's too many nodules in the intestines and too many the foul is coming out of them. She wrapped her legs and shoelaces. I mean, she does look really cool. She looks cool and appropriate for this, but, you know, she doesn't look the most flattering, bulbous at best. Well, it's just a dress that she can't sit down in. And I think that's what a lot of these are, is that they just can't be sat down in. But then I feel like it's like, as in, I think that I want to have a nanny that sucks the breast milk out of me when I've drunk too much. Where is the person that on like, okay, I will lift it. I will get this.

Like, I would have a peepie made. Hold a little piss bucket right underneath your legs. Yeah. You stand and you piss. You're talking about a piss boy? A piss maid. Or build a, build a hole, build a urinal for women where they can just stand over it. And then they just pee right into it.

Or pretend like we're in India. Just piss on the floor. Yeah. In the hole in the floor. They have a hole in the floor. Well, here's the next one. Blake lively. Oh.

I say no dip. I feel like you could pull that up. It's not that tight on the bottom. I say no dippy. You say no dipe? I say no dipe. I say no dip. I can't see a dipe.

Well, it's a long, long dress with peacock feathers on it. It is pretty tight, though, because you got to think with this, you got to think about the drag, and you got to think about the bathroom, and you got to think about what they're going to drag out of the bathroom when they're leaving it. A lot of TP could get stuck in that peacock. A lot of teepee. It might be a little bit of pee pee on the floor. Who knows? I've seen the inside of women's bathrooms.

Those things can be disgusting. Well, men. I don't think men should talk. Hey, we shouldn't talk, but we can. Yes. What I really think that they need is not only the hole in the floor and a pee-pee made, but I think that they need to have underground fans so that they come up and underneath. So it dries you off instantly like you have your hands because, like, I never use the hand one.

I'd rather one for my vagina. Yeah, you don't want to drip dry in that dress. Did she, was that dipey? That was a dipey. Wow, she looked good for diapy. Yeah. Is it like that thinks? Probably.

Everyone has the thinks. Oh, those things. That's probably what it was. You're right. But they can't be that absorbent. Well, they say that they can, that I don't know how much they are. Yeah, but that's for perioding. Yeah, right.

That's not for a peepies. Open bar. Open bar peepies. Oh, open bar peepies. Good Lord. Good Lord. Good Lord. And then there's how.

Bally Berry. Whoa, zebra alert. If she's dipen, God bless her, because she's wearing some sheer on her legs. Is it a pantsuit? It's a kind of pantsuit dress sort of thing. It's very sheer. It's very seethrough. It's very sexy.

Yeah, it's a good dress. And it's really good. No dipey. No dipe, yeah. There's nowhere to hide a diaper in that. You just, you cut a hole in the bottom. Like in the Spinks. Spinks got a hole?

Spanx got a hole? Yeah, you put your fingies up. You open up the hole and you can have a piss party. Really? Spanx have a hole? Oh, they got a hole. I didn't know Spinks had a hole. You don't need Spinks. I got lots of Spinks. They got a hole.

Well, good, because I don't want people to have to be peeling those down. No, the problem is you get piss all over the Spinks because, I mean, it's a hole. At least with that, it's like you're not going to give it back. There's no handsies backsies with these, right? It's a one's and only. Well, it reminds me of when you're a kid or maybe adults also, if you're wearing like a dance leotard or a one-piece. swimsuit and then pants for some reason because maybe it's after you swayam or before

or after your jam. That's also in right now. That's what the girls are wearing. I don't understand that though and then you have to, when you pee, you have to pull the crotch aside to pee. No, you had snaps. I like the ones with the snaps. Sometimes they got snaps. You got to go for the ones with the snaps. Yeah, but sometimes you just got to pull it aside and pee. Yeah, you do pull. You do a pull. To quote Jay-Z, pull the panties

right to the side, don't got the time to take drawers off. Oh, just quick, quick offset thing. I did watch his viral video. I think someone posted on the page 7 Facebook page. of an older woman and Jay-Z was going, he was taking the subway to perform out at the Atlantic Station, you know, his thing. Barclay Center. Barclay Center.

But he was taking the subway there, and she sat next to him and, like, they started talking. She's like, what's your name? He's like, my name's Jay. Like, she just started talking, and she's like, oh, I'm an artist. I perform. She's like, good for you.

For you? She's like, you know, it's a hard business, but you can do it. Like, it was just so great. Then she said, oh, I'm Jay-Z. She's like, I heard of Jay-Z. I've heard of Jay-Z before, but it was such a cute, sweet interaction

that I never imagined from Jay-Z in 100,000 years. I don't know, I thought he was way more stuck up than that. And actually, it was a beautiful little moment. Oh, good. I'm glad you like Jay-Z. I mean, I do like Jay-Z because namesake, we're the same.

You know, I've never, I've never thought of that before. I never thought of that either. Yeah, never, that's never crossed my mind once. Never once had I. All the years that we've been doing this, that has never once crossed my mind. Yeah, never once. I don't think you've ever mentioned it anymore.

Because I was plagued by my entire high school experience. Jay Z. And they're like, you ain't black. That was it. That's all they had to say. Sounds clever kids. Oh, man, those zingers. Kids are super smart.

Woo. Do you know who Priyanka Chopra is? Nope. Well, here she is wearing a gigantic trench coat. Oh, my God. Oh, is she the, wait. Is she a wife as a mom? I don't know.

That's a terrible thing to say. She's also a human being. But she's got to be... Are you reading the handmade tale? Don't define women by their relationship. I'm sorry. But that dress is awful. Yeah, I don't like it.

You have to have a team of people to make sure somebody doesn't step on a big dress like that? Well, it's probably what would you say... How many feet would you say that is? It's maybe... A yard. Six feet in circumference? Yeah, that's a six foot...

More than that. It's a circle that's following her. say the, let's see here, the radius of the circle, I would say, is 4 to 5 feet. 29 feet. 29 feet. But it's a trench coat as a dress.

Not the church conference. It's a trench. Oh, the radius. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hypot news. I bought news 29 feet. I know, math. She's an actor, singer,

model film producer, philanthropist. Oh, that's the meaning she's an up and, she she's Angelina Jolie, except in, from the east. Nobody has that many things on their card unless they're not actually any of those things.

Well, she's a Bollywood actress. Oh, yeah, yeah. She's a big, she's a Bollywood actress. Unaware, I apologize. Who seems like, yeah, she seems like she's kind of starting to cross over just a little bit, but yeah, she's, uh, yeah, one Miss World in 2000. Okay, I step, I retract my criticism.

I don't, I still don't like the dress, but I, she can have all those titles. And that's a dippy. Oh, that looks like a dipey. How is she going to, she can't bring that into a bathroom. How does she even walk in it? How she get up the stairs? Yeah, I got to have a dipe there.

I had, I mean, this is a, it didn't mean to be a racist conversation, but we were talking about the movie Lion, because a friend of my saw the movie Lion, and she was like, I'm going to adopt three Indian children. I was like, all right, it's just because you just watch Lion. And then I didn't realize that that was the same actor as the guy from... Slumdog Millionaire? Slom Dog Millionaire, because I also did not see that movie,

which I heard it was great. And then I, and someone was like, was that the same guy that was in, of Pie, which is not racist comment. But the guy that there was an Indian guy that was in Mean Girls, which I remember him by my brain, but I don't know his name, that he thought that he was going to get the lead in Life of Pie because he's like, I'm an Indian guy. I just did a movie.

I'm probably going to get this. So he went to India. He, like, studied with tigers. He lost a bunch of weight. He studied the film. I don't know if you read it. I just only read it. I didn't see the movie.

I haven't read it. And he came back. thinking that he was going, like a shoe in, didn't get it. Didn't get the role. I was like, man, he wrote a book about how much he put into it and he didn't get the role because he just was like, I'm Indian, the kid's Indian, put me in the movie.

And I was like, of course, I thought you would think that because it's like there is a smaller, in Hollywood here, there is a smaller, you know, pond, pool, pool, to grab them from. Well, not only, yeah, they're super typecast, And it's like where I feel like Hollywood doesn't often just cast an Indian guy in a movie where it's not about an Indian guy. Well, life is pie. Yeah, it's the Indian kid.

He's on a boat. So I feel like- He's stranded in the boat. You know, any actor that's in like a specific niche has to, they're all in competition. Not only because like we don't just be like, oh, well, we'll just have like a regular hot Indian guy in a movie that's not about India, you know. Yeah, but the lion guy's really hot. Yes, agreed. I'll give it. I'll take it.

Yeah, he got Foxy. He got Foxy. He was so young in the first one. Yeah, he was like a boy. A boy. Now he's a man. I still won't watch it. Yeah?

Yeah. Not my thing. Yeah, not my thing either. I wanted it to be more sad. It's too uplifting. Inspiration is a good thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's boring. That's why I like Life of Pie.

You should read Life of Pie. Should I read it? Yes. Worth a read? Yes. Well, we don't really have much celebrity news this week. It's been a bit of a slow one. It's been a slow week.

So we're going to move. I actually got a pretty long list. Let's move on to the list. Who's on the list? Yeah, it's long. Gotta have that list. Actors who peaked in the 90s that might deserve a comeback.

Oh. We just go through them. I love it. Brendan Fraser. I mean, you know, maybe we keep him there. Yeah, you know, I felt like he was overrated at the time. I don't appreciate his good looks. Monkey bone.

I mean, he was, he was attractive. You know what it was? It's his teeth that bothered me. He's too smooth. Yeah, but he also has jaunty hair. He's got the hair of Hugh Grant and the teeth of a child that hasn't been taken care of their teeth. No, his teeth are fine. They're just weird.

I always stared at his teeth. I feel like his face was put together from like a 90s-level video game where you could design a perfect face. Although Encino Man was fantastic But it was because I was in love with Sean Aston Yeah Encino Man was pretty fun I don't know he's got normal-ish teeth No Weird teeth

The way he looks No don't accept it Don't you see what I mean He looks like he was built out of a software program for handsome men He got his teeth done Yeah he used to have a gap Now he ain't got no gap Oh they fixed the teeth

It wasn't the gap that was the problem It's the way they laid upon his face Oh that's a good picture Yeah, that's the thing. Sometimes I think he's really attractive And then sometimes I hate him. It's the weird foppish. You just didn't, you can't be Hugh Grant.

Well, and he's got a big neck. He's like a big neck to Hugh Grant. And he wasn't a very good actor. No, certainly not. And he was a relieving thing. That was God awful. Dudley Do Right. Yeah, maybe the reason that we hate him

is because of the horrible films that he made. The mommy was fun. The mommy was fun. I did kind of enjoy Blasper in the past. I love Encino Man, but that was such a specific time. Class for the Past was good. It was great. I loved any man at a time movie, and he was in two of them.

But he was great in Cino Man, mostly because he didn't really speak. Kind of just grunted, but he was great in it. I also kind of thought he was kind of sexy. Yeah, I kind of thought he was sexy, too. I'm confused by it. It's the teeth. I've been looking at teeth a lot lately. Yeah?

Yeah, there's someone that I've been hanging out. and someone mentions like, oh, our teeth are really small, and now I'll look at her how small her teeth are. Is it me? It's not you. You don't have to. No, I'm talking small. I've always been afraid I have small teeth.

Small, small, small teeth. Very small teeth. Really small teeth can be kind of weird. Yes, when it's all gum and no teeth. Like baby teeth? Baby teeth. Now, are her gums, are her teeth small or are her gums big? Good question.

It's hand in hand. And it's already someone's. in glove. It's already someone that really annoys me too, so now that I got that, I mean, I keep it in the back of my mind. But the bully in me makes up a bunch of jokes of what I would say. Yeah.

But I keep it all inside. Push it down. Always push down the bully. I push it down. What about Sarah Michelle Geller? I could see it. She should come back. And she is very foxy. Well, she just had like a, I think she, did she do the cooking book

with, what's his name? Phil. Phillips. Philips. Wilson Phillips. No. His face. Brady Prince Jr. Wait, really?

Are you kidding? They are still married. Are they? That just seems like something that should have only lived in the 90s. I mean, it is a 90s marriage. But I believe they're still married. They got married in 2002.

Still married. And they're doing like goop-esque things, but not goopified. You know what I mean? Like things I actually kind of dig. Foodsters. Yeah. I mean, it's weird. Yeah, that's fine.

It's definitely uppity. It's a food crafting brand and e-commerce startup selling baking kits for children. Yeah. That's fine. It's no goop. It's not like you pay $25,000 and watch your child stir your coffee for you. Although, if I may, can we talk about necks? Freddie Prince Jr.'s neck too big.

Too long. Too proportionate to his head. There's no difference between his neck and his head. And my problem was always, she's all that, and I never was interested in him. Yeah, no, she's all that was not. He was not hot. He does have, it's a pencil neck. It's like, what is it?

He's got a Bert, an Ernie head. Yes. No, Bert. Bert. Is Bert the yellow one? Yeah. Okay, yeah, he's got a bird head. He's got a bird head.

He's got a bird head. He's got a bird head. He does have a bird head. That's a great way of thinking about it. But Sarah Michelle Geller in, what was it when she did the Coke out of the cross necklace? Cruel intentions. Cruel intentions. Oh, yes.

Yeah, that all don't even get me. Cruel. I think that was a sexual awakening for all of them. Although, don't watch the second one, which was on HBO a lot, which had a lot more. lesbian sex in it so I watched it way more. Was Sarah Michelle Guller also the one in I Know What You Did Last Summer? Yes. Yeah, man, she was fine.

Yeah, Buffy the Vampire. And she's Buffy, of course. Buffy's the big thing. My problem is, see, I never watched Buffy. I think we've talked about this on your board. So many people have told me to watch Buffy. And I have nothing against it, but you know how I feel about. And I have, like, my best friend has been lobbying me to watch Buffy life.

Please. I'm sure that I would love it once. I'm sure once they started rolling, I know that I would love it. But it's starting it, that's the problem. I know, same. I've tried it. I don't like it. Couldn't get into it.

Well, I don't really like, I don't like Josh Whedon. Uh-huh. Yeah, but he just doesn't vibe with me. He doesn't do it for you. Too cute. And then it was like the angel spin-off and all that kind of sense. I just, I don't know. I never got on the train and it's too late.

Yeah, that's how I feel. Too late. Oh, Sarah Michelle Geller was in Funny Farm. Who's she playing funny farm? Uncredited. She was an extra. Oh, okay. I was like, I have seen, oh my God, I've seen that movie so many times.

Funny Farms great. It's a Chevy Chase movie. When he eats the lamb balls? Oh, my God. And the mailman never stops. The mailman never stops. He just keeps driving by laughing and laughing. Oh, my God.

That movie is real weird. It's like basically he like moves out to the country and they get this big country home that's falling apart. And the whole town is like against them. The whole town's crazy. They're crazy. It's a great summer movie We gotta start talking about summer movies

Oh, it's almost summer movie time It's a great summer movie It's still a little chilly here in New York City It's still about like 60 degrees So it's not quite summer movie time I'm pushing it though It's not Twister time yet No

No, no twisters What about Bob time yet No twist is like a mid-July movie Maybe mid-June if I'm feeling A little impatient which this year I think I am I'm pushing I'm just like I'm ready We should have a mid-summer

Film Fest. I've got my shirt on. I bought this shirt. It says it's time to get star spangled hammered. And I think I'm going to wear it every single day. It's really good. The only shirt with an American flag theme that I would enthusiastically wear. It's time to get star spangled hammered. It sounds like they made it for me. I don't know. I've got a t-shirt that I only wear on Thanksgiving. On Thanksgiving. On Thanksgiving. I only wear it on 4th of July. I cut the sleeves off of it and it says improve your image. Be seen with an American. And it's like sparkly? It's from the 70s.

It's sparkly and all the words are in American flag, red, white, and blue. It's a beautiful shirt, and I only wear it on Fourth of July. Okay, I'll allow it, especially for the sparkles. It's got a lot of sparkles on. Sleeveless and sparkles, and with an American flag, I would do it, but it has to be clearly ironic. I just love it. I don't know if it is. No, you all, I have so, I feel like I have a few shirts just like my Christmas shirt when I'm in Florida.

It's a short sleeve shirt that says, have a very Barry, Merry Christmas with a big you're Barry Mandelow on it. I can only wear it on Christmas Day in Florida because it's a short sleeve fucking Christmas shirt. Where else do you go? Where else do you wear it? And they have it right there waiting for me. Alicia Silverstone.

She's been gone for a while. She's back. She feeds her baby like a bird. She does feed her baby like a bird, but she's also back. She is back. How is she back? Where is she back? I don't know what this.

I mean, I don't even know. I can talk about the project. It's someone that I've worked with in the past. I'm Instagram friends with her. And she's working on something with Mina Sorvini. Sorvino. No, Zervino. And Alicia Silverstone right now.

And I think it's a funny show. Is Mia Sorvino? Is it American Woman? Yes. Yeah, that's in post-production right now. Yeah, yeah. You're not telling tells out of skull here. That's how I think that she's allowed to post the pictures on Instagram.

And so Alicia Silverstone's coming back. Oh, a single mom struggles to raise two of her daughters on her own. How's that going to work out? Uh-oh, Zaney. I've never heard of that story before. I fucking loved Alicia Silverstone. Like, she was, like, my fate. Because that Clueless was just my favorite.

She was one of the de facto hot girls growing up. Yeah, for sure. Like, she was, like, a buy word for hot girl. But she really, she was really funny. Like, I feel like she had really, she was really funny in Clueless. But, well, Henry did that movie with her that never got released. They will never let him forget about. Oh, man, never let him.

But he hung out with Alicia Silverstone. a bunch and he was like she was great yeah she was just a lovely human being yeah um who you said though mea servino what is the i have a scene american beauty no um i have a scene from a movie ghost town no i'm not sure if it's the right person i'm thinking of or if it's another i sometimes mix up people like chloe savagnet but it's not her mea serving is she does she have like a stern face and is there a movie where she's wearing a blue leotard and she does a lot of spinning are you thinking of Romney and Michelle's high school reunion? No. Okay, no, that's not who I'm thinking of.

Oh, that's also not who I'm thinking of. No, what's her name? What's her name? The one from American woman. Let me, I'm going to have to look it back up here. American beauty? American woman. No, American woman. She's in American beauty. American woman. Oh, uh, uh, I'm sorry. I'm so embarrassed. You know, as she was in goes. Nina Suvari. Mina Suvari. Wait, wait, can you bring up a picture of her?

Close, so that was so close. She was the blonde girl in American Pie. And the young girl in American Beauty. And she's a ghostout with Steve Bishemi. Wait, good job, Marcus. Wait, okay, that's not who I'm thinking of either. Nina Suvari, Chloe Savini, Mirisorvino. Mirisorvino.

I mean, it's there all. Marissa Tomei? No. Untamed heart. Oh, it's a movie about teens, and the teens are mean to each other. And she's a stern teen, and there's a scene where everyone's mocking her. She does a dance at a recital. She's wearing a blue leotard.

She does a lot of spinning. Oh, it must be, it must be. She's all that? Never been kissed or 10 things I hate about you? Never been kissed was, that was. True Barry Moore. But I think it was a supporting character. She wasn't the lead.

She was a friend. Oh, fuck. We're not going to figure it out now. I'm going to have to go home. Yo, you don't have to leave in the middle of the podcast. But it's something, she has a name like Chloe Seven-Ye or, I said so much so that I thought Chloe Seven-Yeh was her. And then when I started watching Big Love, I was like,

well, that's not who I thought Chloe Seven-Yea was. Did you finally stop watching Big Love? Yes. Yeah. I think everybody does. You know, you had to give it up. Just slowly stopped. Gina Davis, where's she been?

Well, she was on that? What is it? The president's wife. I was the president. I'm a woman and I'm a president. That's right. She was on it. She is, she was on I'm a woman and I'm a president.

I remember, I remember that show. That was like a big hit. Everyone loved it. Wait, what show? I'm a woman and I'm president. It was actually, yeah, it was a show that was like short-lived. God, what was it called? First female.

I, oh, don't trust me. It was. I don't, actually, I don't know. I'm not seeing. Or are we thinking, hmm, that was a while back. No, I mean, League of their own, Gina Davis. She was on an episode of Doc McStuffins. Commander in Chief.

Commander in Chief. That was like 10 years ago. I mean, that was 10 years ago? Betro ended in 2006. Are you kidding me? I was like, oh my God. What's wrong with me? I thought that was like yesterday.

I know because I, shit, I was kind of thinking that too. It was like, yeah, I guess I saw ads for that in the train. a year ago or something. God damn, that was 10 years ago. Oh my God, we're so old. I'm surprised it's not called like Commandress in Chief or something like. I mean, back then, I mean, I guess back

that it was like, Follies. I'm a woman and president. Handmaid's tail can go to fuck. That's a great theme song. Let's using the TV Exorcist version.

Oh, yeah, that's right. She was in don't talk. She's in a movie coming up called Don't Talk to Irene. I will, I love Gina Davis, and you know how I feel about a league of their own. So, forever and always, Doddy Henson. Beetlejuice. Of course. I know Beetlejuice too, but you know, I don't have a little bit.

You got to go for a leader, but I got to go really. But she also wasn't even my favorite character in their old man. They still love Don't know. But remember how long. Her husband was dead in the war. Remember how long Tom Hanks peed, though? Oh my God, and Bill Pullman? He's another one from the 90s that needs a comeback.

I love Balmaman. I love him. Wait, I'm sorry. Not the one who died. No, Bill Pullman. Sorry. Today is the day we claim our Independence Day. Yeah, while you were sleeping.

Those two are different. Paxton is who I'm thinking of. Yeah. Paxton is the one that died. Pullman is one still alive. I wish, I mean, I want to see the debate. of Michael Douglas versus Bill Pullman as sexy as president. I'm going to say Bill Pullman.

Although I love the American president. What about Kevin Klein and Dave? Ouch. Ouch. Or is it Martin Sheen in the West Wing? Yeah. Would you invite him? No.

Not invited. But Kevin Klein is invited. Yeah. Kevin Klein is fox. Foppish hair. I mean, in Big Chill. Yum. Yum. Yum.

Yum! I would never let him fuck another woman. And that is that. I don't care how bad she wants a child. Get IVF coming to the fucking 2010s. What do we call 2010s? We had the aughts and what's this one? I think it's just the 2010s.

That's it? We don't have a fun one. Like Diasis. I like Diasis. Diasis. Well, you know, in these times the Diasis. The Diases, you know. The Diases are almost over.

Oh, my God, don't remind me. We've just been saying this decade for seven years. Yeah, this horrible decade. And, like, remember the Diasis? This decade is actually, this decade has been fine to me. This decade has been fine until just quite recently. Personally, it's been a wonderful decade for me. Yeah, that's true.

I mean, in general, it's been a little rough. Yeah, it's been, yeah, it's been. I've had, and it's been. 2010 was a great year for me. Yeah. 2010 was the year I met all you find people. Yeah. Yeah, that was a good summer.

This has been the decade of us. The decade of us. Oh, my God, that's what we're going to call it. We're going to call it. Yeah, we don't need no D.A. I mean, I love D.A. I really enjoy D.A.S. I enjoy D.A.S. too, but for me, it will always be the decade of us.

Yeah, it is the decade of us. Even in a literal sense, us three, but also I feel like it's a decade of us in the sense that we live in a time where we all feel, we don't all feel united exactly. But we all, there's a kind of collective. I feel like we all experience things together, you know, because of the internet. Yeah, social medias. Yeah, we all get pissed off together. We all get happy together. We all are vaguely indifferent to most things together.

Most things. Neff Campbell, what about her? I love her. I haven't made a decision, guys. I'm going to start watching Party of Five. Oh, really? Yes, I've never watched it. I've never watched it either.

It's all on NetFesion. Netflix. And I think that's where I'm going to go against. Neff Gamble was so fucking I hear it. I had a buddy in college who was obsessed with Party of Five. I don't know why, but he just, he knew everything there was to know about Party of Five. I think it said, what's his name, Scott Wolf? Mm-hmm. Like, vaguely, like, how do you pick him out of a lineup kind of do?

Yeah, one of those guys who I would, as soon as you said, Scott Wolf, I started picturing the guy from Austin Powers, Seth Green. Yucky. You're yucky. I know. He's sexier than that. I know, I know. But, you know, just 90s names that I associate with each other. It's vaguely sexy, though, because, like, I have a vision of what he is in my head.

But I think that he gelled up his hair, so that's a problem for me. Well, sometimes he jelled it up. Sometimes he let it flop down. There's a lot of floppies. There's a lot of jellies. A lot of plaid. Wait, I'm sorry. Was that a picture of...

Is that the guy... From Lost? From the Santa Claus? No, it's the guy from Lost. Oh. He was, like, one of the main... characters in Party of Five. Oh man, I'm gonna watch Party of Five.

Wait, who's the floppy-haired? That's Scott Wolf? Yeah. No, the other one. Who's the sexy one? That's Matthew Fox. He was the main character in Lost. He was so much sexier back then.

He's got plaid on and he's got floppy hair. He's got a baby in his hands if that doesn't play. And he's got a baby in his hands. Oh, yucky. No, that's a bad picture. I like the other picture better. Scott Wolf looks like a generic Michael J. Fox. You're right.

I think I like the other one more. Oh, I can't wait to watch it. I'm going to just rule. And I think there's sex But I think they also have to take care of kids They have to take care of kids I think there's a lot of him and and hawn about sex I might get on this train with you

I think you should get on the train because I'm kind of excited Yeah that sounds great Because after I read Handmaid's Tale I'm going to have to watch Handmaid's Tale And then I got to do something with my life And you gotta have a Oh we all laugh Because we feel it

You have to have what's coming up next Because the second something is done You're like what am I going to do I know. Don't I know it. I still have not watched the last episode of Parenthood. And I never will. I never will watch it. I finally watched the last episode of season one of The Get Down.

It's very good. It is good. It's too long. No, I know that you think that, but it's very good. There's a lot of sex. I like sex. Beautiful sex. It's very good.

Yes, Jackie. That is something you enjoy. Marley, talk about all the checks. That's the only way to get me interested in anything. Give it a try I do the same thing with my girlfriend It's like but it's really sexy Like oh is it sexy

You women you're all the same You're all the same You dogs It's not like too beautiful It's just beautiful people having sex Oh okay You know I like you know I want to feel like me when I watch the sex

Well they're not like abnormal It's a beautiful story Aren't they old teens though? Some teens. I take it back. I love teen sex. I was going to say. I was kidding.

So do you don't like teen sex? Hop off your high horse there for a second. You're right. You're right. I love teen sex. I love all sex. Yeah, and it's all 70s-y. It's really, you'll like it.

Okay. You'll like it. All right. It's time for our one blind idol. Uh-oh. We can't see it. This is a juicy one, though. Then this is one that I can't almost guarantee we're about to see unfold in a big way.

What? What? Behind the scenes, the divorce is being worked out between this A-plus-list reality star and her former A-plus-less husband. At this point, I'm not sure they even like each other. He's working to get his issues under control, but our reality star just wants a settlement and for them to go their separate ways. Jackie's face right now. She's like your mother who you just told, like, that a relationship isn't working out. And she's just like, I know, I know. I know. I know. I know.

Tell us. KK. Oh, yeah. We're going K and K-square. We're going K and Kanye. Why is he formally A-list? Yeah, he's still A-list. Well, A-plus list.

He's still A-plus list. I think he's, well, I don't know. His star power has woned a little bit. I wouldn't be, I wouldn't mind, honestly, if he lost the plus when he met with Trump. Sorry, toilet flush. I'll toilet flush myself. You can join the plus my way out. But you're right, though.

You know, it was rough. You know, I've been a wrong-time defender of Kanye on this very. show and I do, wouldn't mind if he lost this plus. I'll give it to him back. I don't know if you're going to earn it. He's got to earn it back, yes. Yeah. With some public denunciation. I can't believe

they had two children together. I really can't believe it. And I know that they did it for money and I know that they did it for power. But it that's crazy to me. I just, you know, I want them, but then it's oh, Lord, then it's 20 more

seasons of her just being like, I came a little Then he left me Oh my god Do I have kids I don't like in gear Where's me peepie made She's got a beepie made

And she don't even fucking need a beepie made I know that's true So you think Marcus is gonna play out Like on the via the show No it's well the show Well the show doesn't keep up With real events fast enough Yeah I think this is

I think this is gonna be something That's kept secret from the show And then it's just gonna explode because he did not attend the MET gala with her. I mean, look at the two of them. They can't have fun together. Can you imagine them just being like going out and be like, let's get some happy hour drinks?

Yeah, that relationship has never made any sense. But I will still listen to Bound 2 even after they break up because I love that song. Is that a song? It's a song about her. Oh. He's a lot of references to her. Is it like talking about her butt?

Is it a butt song? It's talking about fucking her. I'm sure there's a couple references to her butt. here and there. Which is... And no, it's weird, dude. She went too far. It's fake.

She went way too far. It used to be just... It was fine the way it was. She was fine the way it was. She was fine the way she was. She was gorgeous way she was. All of it was fine the way it was. There's this meme out right now

of showing like what she was even just like five years ago in her ass in the shape of her ass. And now it's so gelatinous and fake. It's like, why are you doing this, dude? Yeah. Yeah. There was a picture of her on the beach the other day.

It looks ridiculous. It looks like a cartoon. Yes. It's too, she's gone too far. Where is he going to go next? That's the big question. He'll be secluded for a couple of years and then come back. And I think he'll come back with a pretty good album.

Yeah, because he needs it. Also, like, I feel like, I mean, I feel like a lot of people talk about Kanye having kind of like undiagnosed, like trauma since his mother died and needing, like, mental health support. So maybe he'll get that. and then maybe not but maybe and then he'll come back with a good album I know they also just had that news that came out that he's raised so much money for this charity that is his charity that I think 0.05% of it has gone to anything so it's like he's gotten a lot of bad press it's not looking good for him

yeah I wouldn't mind if you went away but I also don't listen to the rip rap although I started listening to Kendrick Lamar I'm into it my husband yesterday was texting me I feel very very much Very woke, if you will. Well, congratulations. I was at the grocery store. He's texting me, he's like, Kendrick Omar is really good.

I was like, yeah, that's true. It's Snip, Snappy, Rip, Rap. And that's the kind I like. Kendrick's is very, very good. I mean, it's no, you know, meet me at the cross, so you won't be lonely. I mean you at the cross

you won't be lonely. Man, remember when he's like, Uncle John was up in the clouds and he kissed up to him to the P sign God, that video is good and that's where we're going to leave you all today Leave you where we started I'll see you when you get there

Maybe when you get there I can't sing this song It's too high pitch For more shows like the one you just listened to Go to cavecomedy radio.com