Page 7 - Episode 241: Valenwine's Day

Episode Date: February 15, 2018

Jackie, Molly & Marcus discuss the "Queer Eye" reboot, the drama between Kim Cattrall & Sarah Jessica Parker and the upcoming arrival of Gunt Knefel. If you like the show please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/page7podcast Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Oh, guys, she woke up with another bad one in her head. Can you take me high? I'm going to kill myself. Today's today. I am going to kill you too because we record this show on Wednesdays, and on Tuesday, yesterday, I was walking around. So it has been six days since I had seen you guys. And I'm walking around my house going,

I know when the house I'm like, I can't only mean one thing. And I'm like, why? I like stopped and evaluated. I was like, why? why, why? Do I have Drake in my head? And then I remembered that it was six days ago when we last recorded this damn podcast

that Jackie started off the show with Hotline Blitz. Welcome to page seven, everybody. I'm Marcus Parks. I'm Molly Nuffalo. I'm Jackie Zabrowski. Bringing you the earworms. You don't want to hear worms.

I was, uh, this morning, for those of you that don't know, we released our Patreon page this morning, so come check us out. Look up page seven under podcasts on the Patreon. We listed it in the Facebook group. We got it on our Twitters. Come at us.

But I was just talking in it when I was writing. I was writing at like 6.30 this morning. And I was just, I typed the word higher. And now I can't get it out of my head. That's how that happened. Posting our Patreon link is led you to Creed. Yes. And you know what?

I legitimately, throwing it out there, enjoyed Creed. I did. Yeah, me too. I own both my own prison and what was the set, what was the one that Hire was on? I don't remember the album. You had two Creed albums. I had the debut, of course, and then I had the one after that. Were you, what was your relationship with the Christianity? Nebulous.

It was there, but I was there for the rock and tunes more than it was for the fake Christianity that Scott Stap and company were putting forth. I had some friends who were in a Christian rock band in high school, and one of those Christian rock songs I loved, and I'll still jammed out to that song, so I'm not above jamming out to some Christian rock. I mean, honestly, with arms wide open, it's still another one that gets stuck with arms wide, open, wonder, so, ah.

Scott Saps' voice is so, you know what? Intoxicating. I'm going to say it. Intoxicating. intoxicating like a nice cool bottle of Boone's Farm Yeah yeah Although when I just typed in Creed Into my computer

First thing on Rolling Stones The 10 worst bands of the 90s Excuse me I think I gotta go with Rolling Stone on this guys I mean they are fucking Creed I feel like I'm in a parallel universe right now You guys are both talking about how much you love Creed No we're not talking about how much we love Creed

No, we're not talking about how much we love Crete. Okay, to get that out of your head right now, we're talking about how at one point in our lives, we both enjoyed Creece. 97, 98. It was a heady time. Yes, but there was a lot of good songs around in 97 and 98, which, you know, maybe Creed got swept up in there.

I've seen Creed play twice because they're from Tallahassee, so they were perform at Florida State. So, again, I've seen them perform twice. Oh, my God, do I still like Cree? Creed. Okay, see, now that's a little different there because you liked Creed in college. Well, I'm, you know, I, I, I, yeah, that's, that's not the year of 1990. No, that's different.

No, it came out in 1999, so, tech, I was 12 years old. I'm allowed to like Creed at 12. I don't know. Between the two of you, you got two Creed albums and two live shows. I feel like it's a level of fandom. That is like more than some of my actual favorite bands that I've had. Oh, no. Oh, no.

Who am I? I'm not 24601 right now. That's for fucking sure. I ain't no prisoner, no lay miss, bitch. I'm going to have six days from now. I'm going to be walking around singing, can you take me higher? Mm-hmm. And then you're going to go, let's do it on Spotify.

And then you're going to get into my own prison and you're like, this is okay. Human Clay was the other album, by the way, Marcus. Human Clay. Human Clay. Yeah, that's right. It had that horribly photoshopped cover that looked like belonged to like a Tallahassee bar band instead of a multi-platinum selling rock band.

Well, and wasn't there a Christian, another Christian rock group called jars of clay. Lots of clay imagery. Well, they're moldable, Marley. Jesus Christ is a molder of men. Ah, Jesus, is that the thing? Is that what the thing is? Oh, my God.

Our Lord Jesus Christ, Marcus. Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Well, I mean, we release something else on our Patreon page. It's time to start talking about baby Gunt on here. That's true. It's our own blind item that we are releasing. Rich podcast host is pregnant. It's definitely not me.

It's not me. And it's not Jackie. Congratulations. It's Molly. Molly. The very first LPN baby. The very first. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. This is amazing. And I just can't wait to see. I think that it should be a fight to the child death of who was the baby first you or Jojo. I know. Well, I told you, I tried to figure out exactly what her due date is based on the tweets. And I'm pretty sure that I'm a couple of weeks ahead of her. If we can take Chip Gaines' tweets at his word that the baby was conceived after that concert.

that I already forgot the name of the band that it was. But we're about, we're pretty close. We're like pregnant peers. So, you know, it's basically like we're best friends. So if you have a boy, are you going to name him Gunt before she gets to it? Because she's definitely going to name of Gunt if you don't. You know, I already know that a lot of listeners are going to be demanding that my child take that name. But what we have to remember is that we summon the existence of Gunt Gaines out of a specific

conversation for the need for a fifth Gaines child. I just don't feel like I can take that name which clearly belongs to this other fetus. You know, I just don't feel like I can take that and bring it into my own family. That is a Gaines family name. Your Gunt Nafel sounds

actually really fun. I'm very German. Actually, I totally want to hang out with Gunt Nafel. Oh, Gunt Nafel has a lot of bad ideas, I feel. It's 100% more German than I am that name. But, yeah, so I am excited to go through this with Jojo.

But I, and I'm excited for, thank you to listeners who have already said congratulations. There's very, very, very sweet and had a lot of very good gifts. But I will dispel any rumors that the name might be gunned because that is already taken. by the Gaines Child. Good for you, baby. Good for you, girl. Did you see, speaking of Chip and Jojo,

did you see, today is Valentine's Day. Happy fucking Valentine's Day to you guys. Whatever. I'm calling it Valen Wines Day. Where are all of Valentine's Day things? That's good. That's way better than Palantines Day or whatever.

Yeah, Palantines Day. That's like when you hang out with your friends. Although I do like the Galentines Day, which is always February 13th, which is from Parks and Rec, because they tweeted out this picture that they had a little reunion yesterday of all of them spending Galentine's Day together,

and that's kind of sweet. Yeah, Galantine's Day is fun, but Valid Wine's Day is much better. I'm currently drinking white wine out of a mug, and it says, it is a recipe for fuck-off pie. It says, one cup of no one cares, a dash of kiss my ass,

a tablespoon of fuck you a pinch of blow me stir and shove it up your ass happy valin wines day everybody well you know you're drinking for two now since I can't so I expect you to take on

that burden for me technically I'm drinking for three if you include the gunt that's inside of you yes that's true you're drinking so that you could one day when the baby is much, much older and an adolescent teen or maybe even older,

teach them how to have healthy drinking habits. Yeah, sure. I'll learn how to drink from your aunt Jackie. Man, I'm going to make your kids so fucking cool. Although at the same time, my niece won't read all the Holocaust books we give her, so what are you going to do? But what else?

I will point out the laugh that Molly, like when you said, I'm going to make your kids so cool. And Molly goes, Ha ha ha. Yeah. Let me at that kid. I'll wait until the kid is 13.

How about that? Yeah, I mean, I actually, you know, I feel like, you know, it's this weird thing where you're like, ooh, all my cool friends are going to make my kid cool. But then when I think about my childhood, I'm like, I didn't really, like, my parents' friends, I was like, oh, other adults, you know.

So I want my kid to think that my friends are cool, but I don't know if kids are really set up to think their parents are cool. No, not at all. We will be uncool by association. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, Henry and I are both an uncle to this child, and she thinks that we're the lamest thing on earth, so, you know, that's fine. Whatever. But, back to what I was going to say, is that this morning, I got

a little teared up because I was reading Chips' Valentine's message on Twitter to Jojo. Oh, I read that. It was sweet. He was like, it's all about commitment. Yeah, he says, there's no such thing as a, quote, perfect marriage. For me, it's always been simple, commitment. Every morning I wake up committed and pray that she chooses the same. And so today, again, I choose my beautiful bride to have and to hold till death do us part.

Hashtack happy Valentine's Day, sweet girl. I think it's fine. I actually don't know if I agree with the sentiment. I feel like commitment is not what you need like The idea of waking up and choosing your partner is like great And I think you should do that every day Commitment in and of itself If it's a bad relationship commitment's bad

You know what I mean? Well it's also it's a little desperate It's like every morning I wake up committed And pray that she chooses the same Yeah a little bit It's like Jesus Chip Just settle down a little bit Be secure in your relationship here

Yeah admittedly Joanna Gaines is in a totally intergalactic league higher than him And I love Chip a lot. Yeah, but also, I mean, we all think that she fucks the carpenter. So maybe that's what this is really about. The wood guy. He's a craftsman. The wood guy. He's not just a carpenter.

But yes, I do think that, I mean, but that guy, Clint, when Chip tweeted about the pregnancy, Clint retweeted Chip saying, what did he say? Remember we taught? He said like, atta boy. Yes, ad aboy. Which I fucking hate it. I hate it when people are like, yeah, you fucked her. Yeah, good job on the goose.

Yeah, but at the same time, I think he did that because it's just like, I think he's also just sitting there, like, cross his fingers, like, please don't be mine, please don't be mine, please don't be mine. Uh-huh, yeah, just a reminder, like, I'm also fucking her. Atta boy. I imagine they're Christian enough that they don't use condoms, right? I'm going to go ahead and assume that, so his goosh could be this gun. You never know.

No, they've got, like, seven years between them and the last. kid. I'll bet that they use something. And to get the full story on the Gunt thing, just listen back about five or six episodes. So I'll explain there. Some new listeners may be confused about our liberal use of the word Gunt.

Yeah, and that this isn't technically a podcast that's only about Chip and Joanna Gaines and the show Fixer Upper. It's just a show where we talk a lot about Chippin' Joanna Gaines and the show Fixer Upper. Just because I'm completely, completely obsessed with their family, and that's okay. I don't follow them.

I'm not going down to Waco. You don't see me down there. It's fine. And, you know, I said that Joanne is in a better, in a higher league than Chip. And I say that as somebody who has found myself doing some fantasizing about Chip. You know, I think Chip is a, chip is, he sneaks up on you. You realize you're in love with him after a while. Oh, my God.

I'm completely in love with him. That said, I do think Jojo is just in a, you know, she's just, you know, stellar. Yeah, yeah. She's intergalactic. I love her. I love everything about her. I love that even her beautiful sister, she's still hotter then. Go fah! And all the children are beautiful.

You know, she's also one of these pregnant people who, like, just, you know, looks fantastic all the time, and is still really well-dressed, and, like, you know, I feel like I've just been wearing the same two shirts because I don't want to buy more clothes, you know. And meanwhile, Joanna Gaines posts a picture of herself, and she's like, oh, I woke up in the middle of the night, and had the munchies and there was no cookies in the house, so I baked some fresh cookies. Jesus Christ, that's almost a little too much. Come on.

That's a little too much. Yeah, who does that? Nobody would just lie down, Jojo. It sounds like she has a terrible anxiety problem that she's trying to get under control. Yeah, I often wonder what their demons are. They must have some, because they don't present any, and they must, everybody has some demons.

Yeah. Oh, I got a lot of demons. What was it, the child's hand killer? and, um, uh, it was a frailty. You guys remember that movie? Like, my hands. Fralty. Oh, dude, it's pretty good.

It's got Matthew McGonaghanay and Bill Paxon. It's all these flashbacks and they're trying to figure out who the gods. Oh, it's God's. Oh, it's God's Hands Killer. He's like, my hands only killed demons. It's set in the South and it's fantastic. Just throwing it out there. Kind of creepy.

Ooh, and Matthew McConaughey plays the killer? Dude, well. Or at least from what I can see from the, he looks very, scary on the poster, so I'm just assuming here. No spoilers. He's very scary in it. It's pretty good. I haven't seen it in a Fornion, but I imagine it holds up.

But what I have been... What was that? A man confesses to an FBI agent, his family's story of how his religious fanatic father's visions led to a series of murders to destroy supposed demons. Yeah, I'd watch that. Yeah. His hands are there to kill demons, baby. Oh, Power's Booth is. in it.

Dude, he's so good at it. Oh, and also a man named Dirk cheatwood. Sounds like the name of the carpenter Jojo fucks unfixer Upper. Am I cheating woods got her good? Oh, Clint, your brother Dirk's outside.

Oh, I'll fuck Dirk Cheatwood. Well, speaking of scary, can we please talk about what I think the most important news of the week, which is the feud between Sarah Jessica Parker and Kim Crutel. I have not been able to stop thinking about it since the weekend. We have to talk about it. Dude, it's already insane. So you want to give the backup story? Like what happened before? Yeah. Well, so the backup story. And I actually meant to refer back to you guys, because we've talked about this in the blind items. They've had this longstanding feud, Sarah Jessica Parker and Kim Crichel. And I actually,

was going to ask you, Marcus, I feel like I remember a blind item where we all are in the Kim Cottrell camp because I just think that's the only camp there is. I'm there by default. I'm there. I'm like there in solidarity. I really don't have an opinion on it, but I'm there in solidarity. We're just like dragging you into the camp. Sure.

But because obviously Sarah Jessica Parker just seems like a huge bitch. And Kim Cottrell seems perfect. And so... Although, I don't know. You still feel this way? Well, right. So that was how I felt kind of going into all of this. And I do think I do still feel this way.

But I think that there is some... Basically, I think that even before this all happened this weekend, I think that there was some dispute as to who's actually the real bitch. And I think that I'm afraid it might actually be Kim Cottrell. I think it might be. And so... And so Sarah Jessica Parker, so Kim Cuchel's brother very tragically went missing and then died, and she put out a statement about it.

And this was last week. And then... Well, originally her brother went missing. Right. And no one knew where he was and then it turns out he wound up dead. Yeah, for a few days. And then she issued the statement,

you know, thank you for your thoughts and prayers. But we've, you know, tragically, we're releasing the news that my brothers died. And then, you know, she said, please respect my privacy during this time. My family's privacy during this time. So Sarah Jessica Parker then goes and makes a post, you know, a public, she didn't DM her.

She did a post that was like, my condolences for your family, Godspeed, and I'm thinking of you, thoughts and prayers, etc. To which Kim Cottrell responded with the most hilarious Instagram

post that was like, you are not my friend, you are not my family. When I say respect my privacy, that applies to you and don't try to go and rewrite history with making you seem like you're actually nice. And then she included a link to a New York Post article called The Inside the Mean

Girls Culture of Sex and the City. Yeah, that destroyed sex in the city. Yeah, that destroyed sex in the city that paints Sarah Jessica Parker in a very negative light. So that was the initial development. And that's not all. But maybe we can pause there to evaluate. I don't know.

I feel like it was a very, I don't know, what do you think, Jackie? It was a real stone cold post. I mean, it's definitely stone cold. They definitely hate each other. And now that it's just like out in the open, it is weird because when Cynthia Nixon sent her condolences publicly, she accepted it and thanked her for it.

Right, exactly. When Cynthia Nixon was like publicly said, you know, thoughts and prayers, Kim Quintrault was like, thank you so much. I love you. Cynthia, hearing your voice meant so much. to me. Thank you for reaching out. Love Kim. Hashtag Sex in the City.

What the fuck is wrong with these people? Yeah. What is wrong with him? So that's a pretty big, that discrepancy between how she reacted to Cynthia Nixon and how she reacted to SJP is a pretty big one. I mean, it just seems like Kim Cottrell is like a huge diva. And then Sarah Jessica Parker is just kind of a mean girl. But look at Sarah Jessica Parker. I think she kind of deserves mean.

girl's status because then I saw that what's her name? Superstar. What's her name? Molly Shannon. Molly Shannon, who I love because she's on divorce right now with Sarah Jessica Parker came out also in defense of Sarah Jessica Parker that she's like, I've never had a problem with her. I love working with her. To me that working on the show is not, it's not work because all I do is have fun with Sarah Jessica Parker. And you know what? Who I believe

most of all is Molly Shannon. Yeah. And that's, I think that we've read blind items on here before that's like actually even though it seems like Sarah Jessica Parker is the huge unpleasant bitch that's actually Kim Cottrell and that Sarah Jessica Parker even though I don't know why we all just assume she's horrible and we want to hate her. I think it's because she's like teeny and well dressed and wearing all those silly outfits and I think that she actually might be nice. Although that post article that Kim Kirtel posted says that she was really jealous that Kim Cottrell was such a screen

like that she was the one that everybody wanted to she was a scene stealer because she was so funny which is true and Kim Cottrell's character is definitely the best character on Sex and the City for show man but I don't know I'm just throwing in our own personal feedback because Henry worked on a project with Matthew Broderick and met her multiple times and we were talking about he's like she was nothing but nice to me and I was a nobody

and just like so at least if anything like she is openly a nice person so I don't know what she you know, one-on-one with working with her mean-girlness, but at least she's just nice to people. But I've heard the same thing about Kim Cottrell. That she's nice. That she's nice. Like I like from trusted sources,

that she's like extremely nice and like just kind of like super cool. I think this might be one of those situations where you just have two people that fucking can't stand each other. Yeah. Like two people that are like on their own are totally nice and fine and all of that. But when they get together, they just fucking hate each other,

and they have decided to make this fact public. Yeah. But also, let's be real here. Does anyone really... I love sex in the city. Does anyone really need to see a third movie? No. Absolutely not.

I love sex in the city so much, and for that reason, I don't want to see a third movie. I still don't talk about the existence of the second movie. It is... But Molly, they were in Dubai! Shut up.

We don't talk about it. It's dead to me. I can't talk about it. I cannot look at it. I cannot. When people say Sex in the City movie, two, I'm like, I just pretend that I don't understand what they're saying because the first sex in the city movie is, you know, not unproblematic, but I still love it.

But the second one, I just can't do it. But I do not want a third one. I don't. It's been too long. Guys, it's been like 15 years. Yeah, I love it, though. I do. I mean, you know, I would definitely watch it, but I'd just watch it and sit there and be like,

oh, girls, come on, girls. What do you don't? but if they want to bring it back I will play Samantha okay yes I will do it thank you for asking me yes I would love to do that well and you didn't you were an interesting person

right Jackie because you didn't come to sex in the city until later in life oh yeah man and then I just slammed through all of it and it was the fucking best I mean very dated though but that's okay very dated very 90s but yeah I remember being impressed and also kind of jealous

that you got to experience sex in the city for the first time just a few years ago. I mean, it was pretty amazing. I highly recommend anyone do it. I think it's great for both men and women, too. Yeah, that's the thing. I think men should watch it. Ben Kissel here on the network.

Love sex in the city. Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah, huge fan. Gigantic fan. Oh, that's fun. Man, speaking of things coming back, have you guys watched queer eye yet? Not yet.

It has been on in the house. quite a bit while I've been working in my office. So I've been kind of coming out and seeing like a little bit when I take breaks. How is it? I love the original Queer Eye and I'm curious how this one is going to shake out. I fucking love it. I love it. I love it.

I watch all of it in one day, which says a lot about my life. But I, because I also love the original. and I think everyone kind of had the same. Marcus, did you watch the original? I did not. I feel like it's like one of the, it's another one of those that was like, always just kind of on.

I don't remember actually like sitting and just like watching it straight through, but whenever it was on, I would throw it on. And, dude, it is, I've cried at every single episode. It is so, it's just so heartfelt. And I feel like there are definitely moments that they're making them all be best friends a little too much.

But I love them all individually. so much it's upsetting I can't believe there's only eight episodes and now I've heard that it's even better because I think that now

that many years have passed we now know that Ted Allen is kind of a dick the chopped guy yeah I mean he's definitely kind of a dick well the whole thing is I think that they're like

they're trying to make it rather than before I guess the theme was that they were looking for tolerance and now they're looking for acceptance so it's all in these little towns in Georgia

so it's all these small towns these small town dudes that they're trying to, you know, just like coming to me like, hey, we're just, we're just people. Let's hang out. And like, straight up the first episode, he was like, old school George May, you know, like he'd been married three times. Like, he wore jorts his whole lot. And he just, by the end, even he was crying with them. Because he, he had never been touched like that by people, especially that he didn't even know, that just gave him a chance to be himself. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. It's so good. It's so good. I was watching on the Facebook page and everyone's like telling me to watch it. I was like, all right, I guess I'll do it. And I just sucked in. I love it.

I have been hearing from the living room over the last couple days because Caroline has been very sick and watched all of them as well. Every once in a while I would hear like a sick week. Aw. Like, just it, acknowledgments. It's like, everything okay.

It's like, no, this show's very sweet. Yeah, I feel like it's interesting that they're bringing it back, right? Because it's just, it's a different, it's, yeah, I feel like at the time that it came out, it was people were like, it wasn't exactly the people were like gay people on television, but it was kind of like that. Yeah. And it's a different, you know, it's a different kind of cultural landscape now. Well, also in the fact that it was set in New York originally.

So technically that's a cosmopolitan area that, of course, you know, it's like the whole, you know, the whole country was behind at that point on this, on this aspect. But now that, like, they're taking it to the south, it just kind of changes things. And it just, there's definitely, like, there's a few forced moments of conversation that even I still was touched by. Like, there was a cop from this small Georgia town. And, um, what's his name? The one with the K. Oh, my God, he's so fucking hot. Well, they're all really hot. Uh, Karamo was like, he's the culture one. and they got into a whole conversation because very up top,

they get pulled over when they're in the car. And they think, but it's actually like, you could tell, like, I think they actually thought they were getting pulled over. And he was the one that was driving. And when the cop came around, he didn't have his license on him. He's like, sir, we're just shooting a show. And then it ended up getting into this conversation about Black Lives Matter and how, like,

people interact with each other. And it was definitely state, like the second conversation was definitely staged, but it still was a good conversation. Hell yeah. And they're all, is it, Is it the same as before? Is it like wardrobe, apartment, food, culture? Design.

Well, yeah, design. Yeah. Because now they have grooming and, like, clothing. Okay. Oh, my God. Jonathan's the best. I am so attracted to gay men. This is a lifelong thing, isn't it?

Just forever. I could never truly shake it. That's my problem. Don't even get me started on the dating apps. Good Lord, just like plug him in it. You know what I feel like original queer eyes biggest legacy is in my mind is that it was the first time that I saw

the argument for if you're going ball, if a man is going ball that he should just shave his head and or at least, you know, if you're going to keep some of the hair, keep it very, very close. And I feel like that since then, I'm not necessarily saying queer I did it, but since then that has definitely become the best practice.

Like people don't have that mushroom of hair around their head anymore. Yeah. And I think that that was a huge contribution to society. That's a good thing. Oh, man, I watched something else this week that really screwed me up. I was hanging out with Ed Larson from Roundtable a Gentleman. And he's like, yo, you want to see like a scary movie?

It's like a German scary movie. I was like, yeah, dude. Have you seen white ribbon? No, not yet, but I hear it's great. Good Lord. Don't go into it thinking it's a horror movie. He's like, it's the same guy that did funny games. It's going to be great.

Let's like, let's it. It's like a three hour long black and white movie of this small German down in the 30s where the children are creepy. But it's more, it's just like the whole pre-Nazi thing. I mean, Marcus, you're going to love it. Oh, yeah. That's why I'm surprised you haven't seen it yet. It's very, but it's very long and intense. Yeah, I haven't had time for a long and intense movie lately.

I need to sit down and check it out, though. Maybe tonight. Maybe that would be a good Valentine's same thing. I mean, we're both big horror movie fans. That's a shared love of both of us. Actually, a pretty good Valentine's Day movie. Yeah, maybe a Nazi kid Nazi movie. So it's set pre-World War II, but it wasn't made pre-World War II, right?

Correct. Yeah, it was made in 2009. I just, Marcus, I'd like you to watch it because I need to talk to somebody about it that's not Ed because Ed has seen it like six times, which I think means he's a crazy person. I was, like, nauseous through most of it. So, but there's no gore.

It's just one of those, like, long, just like, ugh. It's more about, like, how humanity is awful than anything. I've been thinking about that a lot lately, so I'm cool. That's just up your alley. I'm thinking about the innate terribleness of human beings lately in a totally different context. But it'd be nice to watch something that confirms like, no, we've always been awful. Yeah, I might actually be interested in that, too. I think, well, what I've decided for my Val and Wines evening by myself is I'm going to watch Call Me By Your Name alone.

Call Me By Your Name. That's the, that is the, like, erotic, new erotic gay romance movie, right? Oh, yeah, baby. I've heard mixed reviews. I'd be curious to hear what you have to say. I mean, you know I'm going to love it. Are you kidding me? A romance between an older man and a young hot man.

Of course I'm going to love it. My problem, because it won for the Writers Guild Award for, I think best original screenplay. And so did get out one as well. And I just, I want to see it so badly because someone described it to me as, you know, the sadness of thinking about your first love and how you're never going to feel like that ever again? I'm just like, yeah, I do know that.

And so it kind of scares me. But, you know, maybe you just need to just like, stab at your heart, stab at your heart. Do you, do you ever, are you ever going to feel again? I think getting, I'm fine. Valentine's Day. Getting drunk and crying on Valentine's Day was my single routine that I had as a single person. So I feel like that was the one thing I could count on was getting drunk.

And not crying, what I would cry about would be a whole range of topics. but I feel like getting drunk and crying is a necessity. I used to get high and watch Nazi documentaries. Also good practice. That's why white ribbon technically now is, I mean, that's just a routine for you. I'll just do it sober this time. I'll just have a couple beers and not get drunk or anything like that, but you don't have a nice relaxing Nazi and beer night.

Yeah, that actually seems like just on par with tradition for you. Yeah, yeah, bringing it back. That sounds great. I really, speaking of movies that make you cry apparently, I really, really, really want to see Coco. I've heard that it's like the best animated movie ever made. Had either of you guys seen it? Have not seen it yet.

It is insane on these dating apps that there's a lot of things that say like last time you cried and most men say Coco. Really? Well, that's interesting. Very interesting. I guess it makes me want to watch it. You know I'm not a big cartoon person. Me neither. I don't usually want to watch animated film, which makes me feel like a crank.

Yeah, it is. I mean, I think, well, both of you enjoyed and loved sing, correct? I haven't seen sing.

Oh my God. Both of you need to, oh my God. What is, this movie was, it was like made for the two of you. I love seeing so much. Really?

Yeah, it's one of my feel good movies. Like, if I need to, like, one day I was having, like, it was just, like, going through a particularly bad, like, depression stretch.

And, like, we're, like, going through movies is, like, the after, And you know, Kelly was like, well, why don't we watch that? That looks like fun and light and whatever. I'm like, whatever, okay, fine. And like, by the end of it, like, I'm, like, weeping a little bit, like, feeling, like, kind of inspired.

And, like, you just feel good the entire time and, like, people, like, chasing their dreams. But also, like, they're all, like, pigs and they're singing and dancing. And, you know, there's, like, a dead British monkey. Or he's a gorilla. But, yeah, it's like a British gorilla. And there's, like, you know, these weird little, like, Chinese or, Japanese dogs. It's so cute.

It's the whole movie's so cute and it makes you feel so good. Yeah, watch sing. Both of you. Okay. You know I don't like uplifting things. Like that's my problem. I don't want to be uplifted. I want to be upset.

You're going to love it. It's like it because it's all like pop music, but like really fun pop music. Okay. It's very, it's just, it's just fun. It just kind of makes you feel good. But that's the same thing for me. I don't want to watch uplifting things either. I don't know.

I don't know what's wrong with me, but I want to watch things that are completely like free of narrative any more complicated than like at the beginning they need a house and at the end they have a house you know this is a very complicated narrative it's a lot of animals going for their dreams

and Matthew McConaughey plays a koala bear oh see Jackie that's right up your alley that's not a sell for me I love Matthew McConae see Holden gets upset with me because I haven't seen Sing Street yet which is another movie have you guys seen this Yeah, Sing Street's fine. It's also fun, but I think you'd hate it. See, he feels about Sing Street the way you feel about Sing. And every time he's just like,

you have to watch Sing Street. You're going to love it. And I don't, I don't, I don't know. You will hate it. Right? You will absolutely hate it. Yeah. I know your taste. I think you would hate Sing Street. I could be wrong. I could be, I could be mistaken here, but I'm pretty sure you're going to hate it. All right. I liked it. I liked it just fine. You know, it's like cool music stuff and all that. It's fun and everything.

You know, I enjoyed the movie. Who do you trust more, Marcus or Holden? Ooh. Well, I mean, Martin did give me the Lord album, which I do love. But I think Holden knows me more for my music than for my movies. Yeah, you and markets have pretty incredibly disturbingly similar taste in movies.

That's why I know you're going to love sing. And that's why I know you're going to love to sing. And that's why I know you're going to love to love. I love white ribbon. All right. Well, at least we both got things we gotta watch now. All right, I'll watch Sing, I'll do it. I'm really intrigued because someone on the Facebook group

told me to watch this movie called Rust and Bone, which she's like, there's a lot of amazing sex in it, but then I read the description of the movie and I got really excited to watch it. Um, Al, or Ali, a former boxer and single father meets Stephanie when he saves her from a brawl at the nightclub where he works as a bouncer. Their casual acquaintance develops into something much more after Stephanie, whose trains killer whales at a marine park, suffers a horrible accident and loses both her legs above the knee. As Stephanie draws on Ali's physical strength, an unexpected courtship slowly comes to life. So I think that Marianne Cotilliard,

I don't know how to say her last name because she's French, I think it's a lot of no leg fucking. You know, I just don't think that you can beat the, I know who killed me for that genre, you know, the one with Lindsay Lohan where she also loses several limbs. Does she really?

Oh, yeah. One to two limbs? I don't remember how many limbs she loses. Do you ever see I know who killed me? You know I have it. Is there a lot of sex in it, though? Oh, yeah. She's like a sex worker who,

I don't even remember why she loses her lens. I think she's stalked by someone. And then I remember watching it, but I think I was not sober when I watched it. And it was 2008 when I watched it, and it was on DVD. So that just gives you a sense of what time period of way. This is the dumbest synopsis I've ever heard.

A young woman who is missing reappears, but she claims to be someone else entirely. It's an unmemorable plot. But don't they say anything about her limbs? No, it doesn't mean anything. She definitely loses some limbs. I see a still of her without her legs covered in blood, so you're definitely right about that.

But there's also a lot of stripper pictures of her. Yes, the whole, I think the first 20 minutes or so is just her stripping. And then she goes missing, and then she comes back, and she doesn't have her limbs. It has a 7% on Rotten Tomatoes, By the way. While filming the climax,

she didn't just stop showing up for filming, they used a body double and digitally replaced her face with low hands. Wow. So they actually pasted a face on a body double. Maybe I'm going to watch that tonight, honestly, because it was, that movie was made in, I think, 2007 or 8,

because I watched it in 2008 or 9. So you know that the CGS must not have been that good. So we really, I'm really interested in seeing how that face replacement went. Was not screened in advance for critics? Yeah, but at the same time, Molly, I don't know if you can soberly as a pregnant woman watch this movie. Yeah, though, you're right.

I got to wait until I can get real fucked up again. Yeah, you're about to really taste your tests. Yeah, I don't know. Test your taste. Sobriety makes it hard to watch things that are much more fun to watch when you are stoned and drunk. I imagine. All right, it's time for the list.

Who's on the list? Marcus, got to have that list. Famous couples? You guys are going to hate this one. Perfect. Famous couples who have matching tattoos. Ew. Ew.

Ew. You, ooh, ew. Man, you know, I got to say, never get a tattoo with a significant other or of something that they drew because I was really close for a really long time because you're like, oh, you're with someone for 10 years. No way this is going to end. Valenwines Day But David and Victoria

Beckham have several matching tattoos including matching Hebrew phrases that translate to I am my beloved I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine Jesus You know I got to say their relationship

does seem pretty solid It is not No? Oh no, the blind items this month have been full of David's Beckham stepping out and Victoria Beckham just kind of having to deal with it. How could you cheat on Posh Spice? He is David Beckham.

Yeah, but she's so tight. That is true. He is such a hot daddy though. I mean, still, straight up. I'm not even usually into like the model types, but good Lord, man. Even his child, his son. He's 18 now, so I'm allowed to say that. Brooklyn is, he's a hot.

little tot. Liam Hemsworth and Miley Cyrus. They do have matching tattoos, but the weird thing is, is that they actually have, I mean, it's one of my favorite FDR quotes. Really? Strangely enough, yeah.

If he fails, well, it's halved. Like the first, at Hemsworth says, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. And Cyrus says, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.

And I love that quote. I'm a huge, you know, FDR fan and all that. But that's weird. Yeah, it is unexpected. That's a weird, that's a weird matching quote. They both seem like shallow people. Actually, it seems like they're both pretty smart, though. Yeah.

I mean, to get as far as that they have, you know, it's like I think that they are fairly smart. And at least with something like that, if you guys break up, they can just finish the quote. Right? Yes. Right. Better to have a quote that's not like his name or that person who got their person's lips tattooed on them.

Oh my God. Yeah. Better to have just a quote. Yeah. Thank you. That you can just be like, I've always loved Franklin Delano Roosevelt. This has nothing to do with Liam Helmsworth. Yeah.

And I'm looking at the pictures of the tattoos. Honestly, like as rich as they both are, you'd think they could have done better than this. It kind of has, like, prison tattoo echoes. Where are on their bodies? On their arms. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Yeah, I'm showing them to Molly right now.

Yeah, they do have a bit of a prison tattoo. Like, it seems like a buddy of theirs at a party had a tattoo gun. Yeah. And that was what they did. Yeah. Yeah, I love, I've always wanted quote tattoo. Like, both of my tattoos are pictures, but all the ideas I ever get for tattoos are quotes and words. and I've never done it because I don't know how to make words look really good.

I think it can be done, but I think it's harder to make a word tattoo is harder to make look really cool, you know. And to make sure that you don't, I mean, the amount of bright-eyes quotes I would have gotten if I had not held back, you know. So I think it's, you know, that's one of where you really want to make sure that you're going to stand behind it. Very much so. At the same time, though, if I had gotten the huge namaste tattooed down my spine that I was going to get, I would at least be able to be at the bottom and be like, namaste in bed. You know, I'd definitely do one of those.

I'd slap it in bed on there. There are definitely people who are no longer together that have matching tattoos. Katie Perry and Russell Brand have matching tattoos that say, go with the flow in Sanskrit. Oh, Jesus Christ. I love Katie Perry so much, and everything she does in public makes me feel embarrassed.

Yeah. Yeah. But at least, is it in a place that they can cover it up? It is the same place that, what is it, the Liam Hemsworth and Molly Cyrus have, the, under the forearm, like underneath their bicep. The fatty part? On the other side of their bicep. Yeah.

I guess none of these people have the fatty part of their arm, but in my arm, that would be the fatty part. Ooh. Brittany and K-Fed. Out. That's a long time. Yeah, they have a pair of dice showing the number seven. Lucky number seven dice. Man, her Instagram is just getting sadder and sadder.

Is it getting sadder? Or maybe it's just staying the same. It's just, it's real rough. It's really rough. Also, today I stopped following Millie Bobby Brown, who plays 11 on Stranger Things, because it's Valenwines Day, and she is fucking 13 years old,

laying in bed looking at, I guess, her boyfriend with, like, hearts on it. And I was like, disgusting. We'll not follow this anymore. It already was making me upset because she's acting as if she's an adult when she's 13 years old, and I know that society's making her do that.

Toilet wash me. But it is very disgusting to see. Can you imagine at 13 years old, your parents allowing a quote-unquote boyfriend to lay in a bed with you? Yeah, that's bad. I remember there was something with Willow Smith, too, right?

Where she was, like, in a bed with a bodyguard. Yeah. I feel like if you're going to have a kid with an Instagram account, and I follow a lot of famous kids on Instagram, you got to have your parent regulate it, and it's got to just be you having a great time getting ready for award shows. That's all anybody wants to see. And maybe having a great time, like, on the set with your, you know,

and then posting a picture of whoever's birthday it is, You, a selfie, you know, kids are great at this. They'll just post a picture with a selfie that they have, whoever's birthday it is, and then they'll be like, have a great day, and it's great, and it just brings me happiness, and that's all you need. I don't, I feel for, I feel, I've been afraid for Millie Brown for the longest time, and I feel like the fears are being born.

Yeah, the blind items are pretty dark when it comes to her. Oh, what do they say, Marcus? I really don't want to talk about it. Oh, no. You know, children shouldn't be. allowed out of the house unless it's to go to school or church if you choose that.

All right, it's time for blind items. Ah, we can't see you. Just got one today because the grimy blind items were not good. Really? It was just like, Bruno Mars did Coke. Yeah, okay. Of course he does. Don Glover smoked weed in the bathroom. Of course he did.

It's like, yeah, all right. So the one we got is the pre-none. This foreign-born A-List singer was forced to sign by his wife includes all kinds of clauses about his sobriety. He isn't really keeping those right now. His wife doesn't really want another divorce right now, though, when things are going great for her professionally. And by foreign-born, I think it's Canadian.

Canadian. What is he? A singer. Country singer. No, quote-unquote country singer. Hmm. Country singer. Another divorce.

Another divorce. And she's kind of going, she's back on the upswing. Blake, whatever his damn name is, Shelton. Not quite, but very close. They're not married. Molly, don't rush them. Same level of mediocrity is raised. Hey, I got to go back at pretty big,

Eminet shooter and lean a little closer. Man, he's such a trash. I love it. The only name that's coming to my mind is Keith Urban, but he and Nicole Kimman and seem way too happy together. Oh, and that's what it is. Really?

It's a cold giving Keith Urban. Oh, he's getting all fucked up. She ain't digging it because it was in the pre-up, according to the blind item, that he had to keep it under control. Apparently he is not, and she's looking for a way out, but she doesn't want to distract

from all the good shit that's going on in her career right now. Dude, that's sad. I love Nicole Kidman. Man, yeah, but at the same time, don't they have enough places like just go live in another country? Right?

I'm sure that's what they're doing. She always kisses him on the mouth so long after she wins an award, though. How can she want a divorce? She's lying to herself. What person doesn't lie to themselves, Molly? Valin Wines Day. Everyone's lying in themselves. It's great.

I feel bad for her. But at the same time, it doesn't... Maybe a midlife crisis will force him to get a decent fucking haircut. Maybe. I don't know. I think you're sticking with that. That's his hashtag brand Oh yeah

And with the sweatbands Around his wrists That's rough It's rough It's rough for him He's the one that's rough Get out of there Nicole Kidman

Yeah get out of there Well that's it For today's page 7 Thank you all very much for listening Don't forget to go And subscribe on iTunes Don't forget to go to the Patreon Is it just patreon

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Hell yeah. Especially Jackie's. And congratulations, Molly. Thank you. Congratulations. And don't forget, this goes out to Gutnepel. Can you drink me high? It's my head!

Oh, and don't forget to listen to Riverdale Roundup this week. Oh, yeah. Because this week, it's murder-most foul. A fan. and alliances and deception. So much to say. I have so much to say.

Goodbye. Love you guys.