Page 7 - Episode 256: Jackie's Burden

Episode Date: May 25, 2018

Holden McNeely joins Marcus and Jackie to goss about the royal wedding, celebrity farts and John Traa's instagram. Visit http://theblacktux.com/page7 for $20 off your purchase. Go to http://stamps.com click on the Radio Microphone and enter PAGE7 for a 4 week trial. Want even more hot goss? Support us on Patreon! Samba Isobel, Whiskey on the Mississippi, Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

This one goes out to you, Prince Harry. So you have finally made up your mind. Take one last look at who you leave behind. When people never say things, they lead themselves astray. Oh, oh, the one that got away gave me everything I never had. by Barry Manloan, he knows it best. You gave up on me and you could have had this. And you go and you marry your actress, you piece of Dutch, Duke, shit.

Welcome to Page 7, everybody. Jackie's upset. I'm Marcus Parks. And with us today, we have Holden McNeely. Hey, how's it going, everybody? Jackie is the fact that he went with another different actress, is that really what burns the worst. I got left for a writer one time and I wanted to fucking, you know,

climb a building and hopefully fall off of it. You know what I mean? Like, so is that what really pops? Yeah. Suites. Yeah, it's very. Because also, you know what? You know what? Suits isn't a good show. Hot take. I don't even know. Hot take. I just couldn't conceive of sitting there down

and turning to my fiance and be like, honey, do you want to watch a show called Suits? Like, what a horrible name. How about like fun Richard or something like that? Something that pops, you know? Yeah, call them all fun dickies. Yeah, I would be totally on board. You know what I'm saying?

I know exactly what you're saying, and it really truly upsets me. It's not even a good show. She's a beautiful woman. She's elegant. I get it. But if you, I mean, at least I did watch a whole clip of just her sex scenes and suits, so I understand. Okay. She has sex scenes?

nude sex scenes? No, in the suit. The whole point of the show, the whole conceit, is that they all are wearing suits that they're unable to take off in this horrible dystopian future. So the whole premise is, will they ever get the suits off, you know? So they're having sex like orthodox religious people, like a hole through the fucking pants.

So they can unzip the suit. Yeah. But they can't take it off their waist. Yes, tiny zipper. It's very painful. It kind of rubs against the base around the neck. of the genitals. Very upsetting.

It's difficult for her to get her pencil skirts up over her no hips, so I get, you know. Yeah, she seems very charming. She did retire from acting, though. Is this not correct? She has to. You have to, right? It's like a full-time job. What is your job now if you were the, what is she a squadron or something?

She's a Duchess. She's the Duchess of Sussex? What does a Duchess do? Yes, let us once again, as we do about once a year, completely misunderstand how the royal family works. Well, I feel like we have to talk about this wedding. Of course. There's no way we can't talk about the wedding. I did enjoy the Molly Shannon, Will Ferrell, HBO, them hosting it as the daily talk show characters.

It took a little bit to rev up. It took a little bit to get going, but about a half an hour in, it started really hitting a fun mark. I didn't finish it. but I did enjoy it and the conceit that they weren't able to actually get inside. The inside of the wedding was filmed by, right? Like, I didn't watch any of it. Yeah, it was filmed, and that's why, but it wasn't audio recorded. So that's why a lot of people are going into like the lip reading and things like that of what they were talking about.

But I did watch the Molly Shannon, Will Farrell, the commentary as a Cord and Tisch, their SNL characters. Yes. And there was this one part. I highly recommend just at least look up the highlight clips of it that I guess his character, Will Ferro's character, is terrified of horses. So when they have the whole horse brigade as they're coming in, Molly Shannon was just like,

okay, I feel like, she's like, I was terrified of ticks for a really long time. Through exposure therapy, I brought in ticks that were bigger and bigger, and I got used to it. She pulled out this huge box that has the Union Jack all over it, and she pulls out a tiny plastic horse. And he's just like, good,

get the fuck away from me, you tiny horse beast! He was just screaming. It was very, very, just look up the highlights. I was laughing out loud. Yeah, at certain moments. So funny.

They brought out some dog, and he was a lot of fun. Did you watch any of it, Marcus? I did not, but if you want to see a real-life version of a man terrified of horses going through immersion therapy, there was a guy that played

for the Kansas City Chiefs, I think, and the Kansas City Chiefs have, like, a guy on a horse as their mascot, and it's like a super clip of him running around the sidelines, trying to avoid. It's like, oh, no, here comes the horse again! And just, like, running away from it.

And then they give him, like, a horse puppet that he has to talk to. Yeah, you know, I understand because my fiancé, the lovely Lexi, she is, has the same irrational fear of snakes. Yeah. Which is weird for me

because, like, I'm a bit of a snake lover, as people might know. I'm like partly reptilian all that happens. I like snakes. I love a snake. I love snakes, too. I honestly enjoy snakes, like, as a house pet. I grew up with friends who owned snakes,

and I really liked them. And so if she sees a rubber snake, she flips that fuck out. If she sees, oh, my God, one time we were at Coney Island and this big old woman on the pier, She had this massive snake Dude she almost had a panic attack and I'm terrible

Because I'm sitting here being like what it's just a fun Snake If she sees it on TV she freaks out Really? Yeah it is like I'm that big woman's name is serpentina by the way Yeah she rules That's the thing and I always have to battle within myself To be comforting her while at the very same time

Like really digging this snake woman Like I want to party with that snake woman At the same time like just breathe baby Just breathe and just being like Hey maybe later we could do some tequila shots Like to this woman Wait, did Lexi never come to any of the Carnie shows we did at Coney Island?

Remember the one with the albino snake? Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. She did. Yeah, she just has to close her eyes and sort of keep away. And yeah, she just, she has to kind of, she freaks out. There's a couple of snake people at Coney on. There's a big dude with a big yellow snake

that just walks around and bothers anyone who looks for. And he's even out there, like we went during the off season once and he even, like, he's still out there. And he's still out there in, like, December. They're all still out there, man. That's what they do, too. Go to Coney Island during the off season. It's the best time to go because it's just

Coney Island people. Hell yeah. And just trying to live their lives and still enjoying the sea air. For real. Best dive bars, man. Mm-hmm. What would you need to, what would you have to overcome via immersion therapy? Do you have something in your lives?

I definitely super don't like cockroaches, but, like, I'll kill and dispose of a cockroach. I just fucking hate the way they skitter-scattered. Yeah. It's the movement. It's the movement. And what else? I had one of the thing.

You have anything, Marcus? Bull frogs. That's right. Yeah. That's right. I forgot. Yeah. Not all frogs.

Like green frogs, I really like. It's the big brown toads that just fucking get me. I hate their eyes. I hate the way they feel. You know, they piss all over the place. Yeah, it's fun. It's funny.

It's like a filthy water park. Everybody pisses everywhere, please. But I remember my other one, and this is actually all thanks to the classic, wonderful film, Honey I Shrunk the Kids, but Scorpions. And it's definitely due to that scene and that movie when the Scorpion comes after that sweet little aunt, a precious aunt, and just ruins everybody's day. It's a terrifying creature. I think Scorpion looks the most like a real-life, like, demon.

Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, which is kind of cool, but like I just, I can't, I can't handle it. What's yours, Jackie? My problems, I'm starting to learn that California is a den of spiders. Yeah. And they fall from the trees because they have the whole Santa Ana winds. And apparently they just like live in the trees.

And then the winds come in and they fall from the sky. And I feel like this is something that no one is talking about when it comes to California. There are spiders everywhere. And I can watch spiders on TV. I'm fine with them. But the other day I was in, I was in the bathroom and I screamed. to Henry because there was this huge, ridiculous daddy long legs. And I know that if they were bigger, that their fangs would kill us, but they can't. It's like trying to bite a beach ball. I've heard that,

and I don't think that that is just a theory. I think that is real. And so I had Henry come in, and Natalie also truly hates spiders. And Henry was trying to scoop it up with a card and take it outside because he didn't want to kill. He's like, these are the spiders. They're good spiders. You don't want to kill Daddy Longlegs. And he's like, come on, come on. I just hear him in the bathroom. He's like, get out of the car. Go out of the car.

You got to get it? And he's like trying to scoop it up. But he ended up ripping off two of its legs while he did it. So he just ended up killing it. There you go. There you go. Why don't you just grab it by one of the legs? And that's how I always usually get rid of it.

Yeah. And then what they'll do after that is grab onto the rest of your hand. And then you make a little friend, a temporary one. And then it's goodbye, spider. I love spiders. I love spiders, too. I think they're so fun. Yeah.

Oh, no. There's so many black widows out here. I just love how Jackie and Natalie are like, oh, we are devil women. We are so spooky, cookie. But the moment a little tiny little harmless spider. They're, oh. He was in the shower with me,

and I got out of the shower covered in soap and made Henry kill it. So he loved that. He's like, put some clothes on. I was like, I'm still covered in soap. Nope. That's fine. He took care of it.

Although, back to our Megan Markle conversation, there's actually a lot of things that she can't do as a Duchess now, which is ridiculous that I didn't know about. She can't take selfies anymore. So no more selfies. Is that the bylaws? She can't even take a selfie with Prince Harry or Duke Harry now? Wait, wait, wait, but.

What do you call him now? Oh, Duke Harry? Do carry? Ooh, that's fucking great. Yeah. Duke Harry. I'm Duke Gary. And I like to be scary.

I always think they just rhyme everything, right? Anyways, okay, you're saying like no Insta or you're saying really just specifically selfies? No social media whatsoever, but also no selfies. But particularly no selfies. If someone took a picture of her with Harry, that's completely fine. With her own phone. Then that's fine. But is she allowed to have a phone anymore?

I imagine. They can't take her phone away. A giant rotary that she keeps inside of a giant plastic purse. It's like way too loud to make a phone call. It's got a stupid antenna that comes like way off of it. Kikkakkakkkkkkkkkkk. It's like the world family's like lost in time, you know? So everything's like a weird version of the past.

You know what I mean? Sorry, anyways, Jackie, you were saying? No, no, it's ridiculous. She can't sign autographs anymore. Okay. That's over because of forgery. She can't vote anymore at all, which I feel like is a weird,

it's like, how do you take away that American right? Right? So she can't vote in America. She just can't vote. Any election, even if it was like a hot dog eating competition, she's not allowed to vote. She has to remain neutral. It's just reminding me of this hot dog competition I went to,

real quick sidebar. We went to this hot dog competition, and it was awesome. It was like an outside, like, block party. all these different booths making little hot dogs, different kinds of awesome hot dogs. Wait, wait, wait. What was your favorite kind of hot dog? Can we just talk about hot dogs?

Yeah, I'll talk about my favorite. Well, my favorite one was the one that won was the one that everybody voted for that was just seriously throwing money at the issue. Literally, it was just like a hot dog covered in delicious lobster. They just smothered. I was barely any hot dog.

And they just like delicious, the butteriest lobster meat you've ever had it. Everybody was so pissed. Like all the other people at this dance, they're just like, oh, what the fuck, man? Oh, yeah. People always do that, and the potlucks and all that shit. They always like, oh, we're going to have a mac and cheese potluck,

and some asshole always shows up with lobster mac and cheese. Lobster mac and cheese, baby. Always going to win. Just get the most expensive. Yeah, exactly. Just paid their way. Paid to play. And I voted for it.

It was the best thing there. It was the best thing there. Of course it was. I recently had a high. hot dog that had crab cakes on it with a rumelod sauce on top and i tell you munchy machi i've never been so sexually attracted to a hot dog before in my entire life and i get that i get the jimmies for him often who's got the better dog east coast west coast west coast what west coast are you better dogs yep really holden mcnealy when you come to

chakwell and soprowski i'm going to take you to take you to the best hot dog play of all time it is within walking distance of my house and my problem is I've been eating too many breakfast hot dogs because the man that runs the place is the best of all time and I love him and I think we're going to get married. He's probably about 60 and his name is Willie and he comes up with a bunch of new sauces every time I'm in there. What are you going to name your first baby? Jackie. Okay. All of my kids, I'm going to George Foreman route. Me too. I'm naming him all George. George. Yeah, but are they going to be, yeah, they're going to be slow. It's going to be perfect.

Exactly. Georgie, you come. Hey, you can float down here, Georgie. That's how I'm going to do. I'm only going to be It the clown in front of your children. Is that fine? Yes, please. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I'm, I also want to have like rows and rows of teeth. You can have those put in, right? I think you can get your teeth sharpened. I would say, yeah, I think you can go into a doctor's office to say, give me the cone head, special. special. Get the teeth rose. Give me four rows back. God, do you imagine having your teeth filed down?

That was in a movie I saw recently where somebody was getting their teeth filed out. Oh no, it was in Barry. I started watching Barry. Barry's okay. I dig it. I'm digging it. Yeah, I like it.

Okay. Yeah, I didn't think it was going to be what it was and someone told me to watch it and I was just like, all right, I'll watch it. And then we watch it together and it was like, okay. All right. I'm into this.

Yeah. It's more about just being sad in an actor than it is about the hitman. But, you know, they bring up the hitman stuff a lot. But it's a lot of just very sad actor L.A. jokes. Hang on. I'm fine. It is one of those shows where I watch it and just think, thank God I didn't walk that road. Yeah.

Ooh, that looks bad. How is it, Jackie? I'm having a lot of fun. I'm having a lot of fun on here. It doesn't make me hate my name. at all. How much you like meetings? Do you love them?

I love them. Yeah, yesterday I was in, I walked into a room and it was just a bunch of like hot girls. The girl before me's name was actually sugar. So, you know, I'm really getting sent out for the right things, guys. I'm going right to the fucking top. Jackie. It doesn't make me fucking hate myself. Having a commercial agent, uh, uh, myself, I have been in some fun lobbies full of

completely intensely attractive people. Have you ever had to audition with little children? Because it is the bait of my existence. I've had it do it a couple times. My worst one, I feel like I may have talked about this for, so forgive me, probably not on this show, definitely,

but there was one time. It was one of the worst audition experiences I've ever had. I went in and it was for depression medication. And I had to be the father of the depressed mother. I mean, I mean, I'm sorry. I had to be the husband of the depressed mother and be with our child out and on. out in the park.

And I had to have this little boy sit on my lap who had no idea what was going on. First of all, sitting on the lap, incredibly uncomfortable to me. I am awkward around friends' children, much less complete stranger children. And I have to sit with this child while like the mother sort of like wistfully

looks off in the distance. And this is all happening. I'm just disgusted. Every part of me is just screaming to leave the room. And I'm just thinking my head. I'm like, what kind of parents? parents put their children through this experience. What kind of creepy weirdo signs up to sit in a room and film these children all day?

Like, what are we doing? I wanted to stand up and just scream. Enough. Stop the madness. It was disgusting and awful. How old was the kids? Very young. Too young to be on my lap.

Actually, no. No age is good to be on my lap. I'm not to say, what's the cut of like what's old enough? 16. If you're 16 years old, you may sit on this. slap here and we'll do a little Santa Claus fucking jingle jam that's too old and too young

at the same time. Yes, it really is. I feel like you'd get in more hot water for that. Just a sad goth kid at 60 years old is the only one allowed to sit. It was awful and I had to do one recently too. Kids are terrible at taking direction and Lord should

they be and they should not be in these rooms doing these things and I know that we need to film real children when we film things that involve children So we just had a bunch of like, you know, like, it would be like Shakespearean, like having the men play women, you know what I mean? Like just having like grown men playing children and everything. I think that's fine. I'd rather that.

You know what they can take direction? I will say actually, I immediately think of like Univision comedy shows with all the in the classroom or whatever. That still happens, right? That TV show. Yeah, I think so. Oh, yeah. Yeah. It's like the most broad, ridiculous comedy and it's still like massive there.

Like every movie could be like Clifford. Yeah. Oh my God, every movie should be like Clifford. Are you kidding me? I was thinking Jack, but yes. Well, but that's the thing is that Jack is that he's an old man. That's the whole thing. It's a illness.

Clifford is Martin Short actually playing a 10-year-old boy, annoying Charles Groden for an hour and a half and having a crush of Mary Steenberg. God, it holds up so hard, and I feel like I've been talking about Clifford so much lately, but it holds fucking up. Watch Clifford. I'd say it.

It's a rickety hold. Hold up. What? That, okay, yeah, but that first scene, that first scene when, like, when him as an older priest, when he walks and, like, Corey Matthews is throwing shit out the window and he just keeps getting hit with things that, like, Pratt falling, I laugh so hard, I cried. That's funny. But what I'm saying as a rickety holdup is that there are fun parts, but, you know,

you push a little bit. It's a condemned building. Yes. I understand. But it just, God, when he acts, he tells him

to have a regular face for a minute and just him trying to be a normal boy. That is great. That is a very funny scene. No, I recently had an audition

with a child as well, but it was like a toddler. And the toddler was screaming the entire time. And I'm fine with kids. I love kids when they're not actors. And this baby just like

he had like poopied, he's dipey. And it was dead. Like, I was just like, I think that, I think he needs to be changed, and I said that to the director,

and they're like, and he said, work with it. What do you mean? Work with it. Are you kidding? The kid is upset. He's sitting in his own mess. Work with it.

You should have just taken the diaper off of him, and just started eating the shit and being like, is this what you fucking want? It's like chocolate pops. Everyone's just throwing up. Oh, Everyone just crying from Mount Hard they're throwing up. I'm working with it.

I'm working with it. And that was the day that Jackie became Dane, Jackie Zabrowski. Thank you, thank you. I will never show my bare legs ever again. Which is another thing Megan Markle can't do, which she appalled protocol because she had her first outing as Duchess and she had to have pantyhoes. Who wears fucking pantyos anymore? Yeah, I don't know anybody. It feels like I've seen Kate Middleton's legs, though.

Yeah, you're not supposed to. Unless she's wearing nude tights, though, it's very possible. Oh. So that's what, you know, but at the same time, I feel like stockings should only be used unless you're, like, getting them ripped off of you while you're having sex. Right.

Some sort of, unless there's violence involved in a sort of sexual manner, there's really no use for them. I don't understand it. I don't think I've ever worn stockings in any other capacity. No, they're just sort of, yeah, they're just sort of there to get your fucking bone growing, right?

I mean, essentially, I don't, for the, for the male, or unless you're in sort of a lesbian situation, then there's no bone involved. But either way, there's some sort of sexual sort of excitement happening within you. You're so woke. You're the most woke man I've ever met.

Lexi left, uh, almost three weeks. weeks ago now, I have been in a vortex of just sort of loneliness and horniness. They sort of go in and out. They reverberate a heavy cocktail of alcohol and and marijuana's have been ingested in order to just sort of forget that she's gone. I've been speaking to the furniture. We've been having conversations. Understandable. You know what I'm saying? Actually, you're kind of in a similar thing too because everybody skipped fucking town, Jackie. So you're out there and you're sort of also

probably speaking to yourself. I mean, after a while, don't you have to? I'm immediately losing my mind. In L.A., all of our friends have gone to our good friend, Sina and Cosmo's wedding in Italy, which I am so happy for them. So happy, of course. They are two perfect people. What I'm not looking for to, and it's already started in the airplane. Yes. Is the constant slew of all of our friends posting photos of how amazing their Italy trip is. Yes. And I'm very happy for them to enjoy their trip as well, but it's like literally I have like five to six different couples posting cute pictures of themselves on this trip. And I'm not necessarily maybe enjoying that.

I'm trying to be political markets. Oh, no, it's very nice to be working, working, working, going to go take a dump, you know, and then it's like, oh, look, like all of the people that I work with are all having super fun right now. Here I am. Working, working, working. Working, working, working, especially. I get extra work because I'm the one that gets to watch all of the dogs.

So I get to bounce from home to home all day long. I'm just like, I've got my computer strapped to my back, and I'm just like, okay, I can work for 20 minutes, and I'm going to take all of my things and go to another apartment so I can hang out with a dog for a while, which in theory sounds delightful. But it's not when no one has backyards. I have to go walk the dogs multiple times a day. And you know what?

It's difficult. Especially when Ed's dog is afraid of everything. He's afraid of wheels. He's afraid of wheels and people and other dogs and restaurants and bones and trees and birds. Well, aren't we the last podcast network shit mules? And we all keep talking like this because it's the only way to complain because it's just like we're trying to be polite and friendly, but everything we say is all very eight. And very That's my problem

Is everything I'm trying to be so positive about it I'm trying to not be Envious of their trip I'm very happy for them I know they're having a great time And you know it's just like I keep getting the text too

I'm just like man you should have come Oh should you have gone Are you trying to build your career From the fucking ground up So you can't go But you should have gone That's what I'm Henry said that to me.

He's like, you really just should have come with us. I was like, do you want me to move out of your apartment ever? I have to keep working. I have to make money so that I don't have to live with my brother and his fiance anymore, so I don't have to not bang 20 feet from him. My, the royal family did look beautiful on their day. And I'm sitting here at my house and saying, you know what? I am going to play two extra hours of Stardue Valley today.

I deserve it. I deserve it. I deserve it. Well, they're in fucking Roma, you know, going to their fancy, like, oh, we booked to such a good restaurant. It's got so many delectable things are going to have Roman pasta.

And I'm sitting there going like, well, you know what? It's wintertime, so I'm spending the whole winter in the cave. I'll tell you what, though, Marcus, you want to hear this about a Roma? Uh-huh. Just a bunch of fucking ruins, bro.

Go outside and look at a rock. That's what they're looking at. Yeah. And we're here in New York City where it's all new and shiny. Yeah, and all the people are mean and no one looks away from their phone when they're walking off the subway. Nobody does. God damn, I had to give some looks today. Oh, yes.

We all have to get, yeah, because you left your house for the first time in what, a week? Maybe a week. Oh, God. Leaving the block. It's like Beetlejuice's house. You know what I mean? I step outside. It's just sand and worms.

giant ones. Today's episode of page 7 is brought to you by The Black Tucks. You know, if you're anything like me, if you're at the age that I am around 35 or so, even if you're down to your 30s, you're going to be going to a ton of weddings this year and next year. And the year after that, it never ends. But you know what? Also, if you're like me, you don't own a whole lot of really nice clothes and you don't want to be seen wearing the same thing every time. That's why you should use the black.

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So to get $20 off your purchase, visit the blacktucks.com slash page 7. That's the blacktucks.com slash page 7 for 20 bucks off your purchase. The Black Tucks Premier rental suits and tuxedos delivered. I'm sorry that that's your existence, Holden. You've got to start leaving the house. There are other things outside of the house. Yes, I'm on a very strong regiment. of vitamin D pills.

We're keeping the mood up, the energy going. But I have to say I was complaining about this boy, we don't have to go too far into it, but I'm just the sweatiest person alive, and being outside is a nightmare, and literally everyone else is just not as dry. I'm fine. Yeah, everyone on the train is dry,

and I'm just covered in water. I look like I just stood on the bridge at the log flume and, like, let the, you know? And you forgot your rag at home today. Yes, and I forgot, I have to start packing a rag when I leave the apartment now. Disgusting sweat rag It's so gross, Holden

When you can like ring it out After you've been sitting in a podcast for 40 minutes A rag and an extra shirt or two I need to start bringing with me now So I will say maybe it's your main problem You're wearing this light gray shirt right now That is just visibly covered in sweat You need to be wearing more black

What are doing? I wanted to I told myself to wear black And I was like be festive for once in your life Be a human Light gray is festive. That's festive for you. Hurrah! Holden is here with his fun color palette.

Oh my God. I don't even want to get into. Let's talk about fucking weddings, okay? You look great. And how shitty that is, all right? I mean, luckily, I bet the Royal couple had a fucking 18 people planning their wedding. Well, it's just me and my lady. And I'll tell you what, I got to figure out what the groomsmen are going to wear and all that shit.

And she's like, I want fucking this, you know, I want festive. bright colors and I'm like I like earth tones and now that's a problem is I enjoy earth tones and I don't like fucking Easter colors you know? Holden what are you going to make me wear as part of your grooms party? A big ugly suit and tie just a big gross I can't wear like a feminine suit and tie at least a giant clowns tie that's what you're wear the big wide ones and make her carry around a big fake cigar a big I'm gonna make her carry around. Hey, hey, hey, everybody. Welcome to hold us wood.

For no reason. I'm gonna make her carry around like a big metal horse. Like just under her arm the whole time. It would be like really cumbersome. It'll be really annoying to carry. There'll be no symbolism behind it. It'll just be there. And you'll have to carry it.

I'll call it Jackie's Burden. And every now and again, I'll fill it with a... It'll have a little thing and I'll fill it with a little bit more water. So it just gets heavier throughout the day. No, why would you do this to me? Because I'm punished and not. Now you're punished. That's why.

Can I at least, I want to carry it around in like a baby Bjorn. Can I do that? Sure, but it'll be called a baby Bjork. Because it'll have Bjork's face on it and music blasting out of it. It'll be all the weirdest of Bjork's music. Nothing poppy or enjoyable. Yes. I want the horse to make that sound.

Yeah, exactly. I see the signs lights, big roses lights. It'll just be the shittiest. It'll be me. covering Bjork and making it up. So anyways, I love planning weddings and I can't wait to be married. Actually, I cannot wait to be married. I would imagine.

Because dinner will be like, it's done. It's over. It's over. Then you just live life. You just live life. Lexi wants a bunch of people to be together from all of our different families and friends. All I can think about is how much chaos that will be and horrible, how terrifying it be. And Jackie's definitely getting kicked off the property for smoking because you can't smoke on the fucking property of the wedding.

Oh. What are you talking about? I can smoke on the property of the wedding. You guys are going to go somewhere and try to sneak it and get kicked out. I know it's going to happen. It's going to be so bad and embarrassing. Can I vape? Sure.

I'll go in the bathroom. Dude, you can vape wherever. That's a cool thing. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Why can't I smoke on the property? I'll get you a patch. I don't want a patch. I want to smoke.

If I got to sit through a fucking wedding, that I gotta be a part of I need a cigarette How am I gonna get fucking through it? Our mutual friend Well people might know Kellan from Jack and he's dating sims every Friday night at 6pm EST on Twitch.TV

4 slash Holdenaders Ho Kellyn at the last wedding He went to literally rolled up With a fucking cooler of Bud Lights Which is like really Balsy to me And then I love Kellyn's reasoning too He's like what?

And everyone's looking to me like I'm crazy I'm like I'm bringing the party I'm like yeah because it's really crazy to walk to a up not And I'm not talking about the reception. Like the 30-minute ceremony needed a fucking full-stocked cooler of beers. Yeah, of course. I don't see anything wrong with that.

Holden, you know I'm going to be packing a flask. I'm going to be sipping from a flask while you're saying your vows. I think we're actually going to hand out flasks to all of our people, all of our close people. So they can get hammered during the getting ready process. So I will say that. But I will be mortified if he does. that at my wedding. You might just have to ask him to not do any of that.

Yeah. I mean, our whole crew. Our whole crew. I'm terrified. There's a lot of X factors going on over here. It's like a fucking Marvel comic book. It's definitely going to get weird. Actually, they're having kind of a fun, weird time in Italy right now because an old school

friend of ours from college, Holden's ex-roommate Jason Kephart decided to surprise them in Rome, who was like, he is like a rager of all rangers. And he showed up and they're all having this like romantic time and they're all like, oh, good. You're here.

Capers, a real wild card. Yep, real wild card. I would kind of appreciate it, but I get that. They're all coupled up out there. Yeah. I just, that actually makes me happy I'm not there. It's the last thing I think I want to be is being all romantic with like three other couples or four other couples.

It's just, I like a solo romance. Solo, Just go to fucking Cleveland like we did. Man, there's nothing more romantic than going to Cleveland. And you go see a cuckoo clock, I guess. We did see the world's largest cuckoo clock. But the problem was is that the cuckoo clock, we showed up right before the cuckoo clock started back up for spring

because they closed the cuckoo clock all winter. Oh, God, you're just hurting my brain. Holden, do you know that Marcus calls it a cuckoo clock and not a cuckoo clock? clock? Yeah, I was trying to kind of block it. I was just sort of trying to be like, okay. Was it watching, like, its wife have sex with a strange man? Is that what makes it for Kaku clock?

Kaku for Cocoa Puffs. Oh. Yikes. Is that a serial that watches its wife make love to a strange man while it sits in the corner? God, it just, it hurts my ears. makes my teeth scream like that red and stimpy episode. Ah, yeah. That's what happens in my brain.

Call the police. Megan Markle can't leave the dinner table before the queen. Oh, really? Really? Yeah. I guess Princess Die got in trouble for it all the time because the queen sits and, like, so talk for hours after dinner is done, and you can't leave the table. until the queen does and Princess Die used to be like,

I got things to do and peace, which is why the queen didn't like Princess Die, which is why they killed her partly. But I guess Megan Markle is sticking to the rules so far and she doesn't leave the table for the queen. What does the queen talk about for hours? Things, man. Maybe she talks about how much she hates Monopoly because Monopoly is not allowed on the premises in front of the queen.

What? Because she must have lost really bad one. time. Is that not what it is? No, she says it's too vicious of a game. Whoa. That's amazing. Yeah, she definitely lost really bad one time. Yeah, definitely what that means. I mean, it's why I don't play risk,

that's for sure. I love the tale. I haven't told it recently. Did we talk about it on Jack and ease of when Henry flipped the wrist board and then beat you with the wrist board? I think, I don't know if I'm sure I've talked about it on here before. It was the first time I ever beat Henry at risk, and I left up the board for days.

They played my games with each other. They played my games. She left the board out. It's kind of like when I would score a touchdown against my brother and mad, and he'd punch me real hard in the arm, which later now I realize this is actually abuse, but Jackie. I suffered abuse by the hands of one Henry Zabrowski. Yeah, he beat me with it until the board fell apart, and then all games were banned

from her household, which is why I hate. video games. I hate, I'm just bad at games. Yeah. I'm not good at them. I get too mad. I got so mad last night. We don't need to talk about video games too much, but I got so embarrassed with myself mad last night playing Street Fighter. Literally just, just, like I was just screaming, just, you know, with Lexi not around, I was just screaming at this game. And I just was so embarrassed. I had to, like, step away and have a drink, and I just feel so small and embarrassed with myself for getting so mad at a child's game. You should play Stardue Valley.

It's very relaxing. I do need to play Star Doe Valley. It is very relaxing. I started my new farm. It's extremely relaxing. I called it Frater Farsia Farm. A farm? This is a farm game?

You guys farm virtually? Yes. He just built, he just farms. It actually has some dating in it. It has a bit of a dating sim. The dating is optional. You can date people in the town. And then eventually you ask them to marry you.

and then they move in and then you have kids, but you gotta keep the relationship going, otherwise they leave you. But fuck all that. All I want to do is farm and mine. Yeah, I mean, we're talking about like... I'm a worker. Name some of the activities you do in a day of Stardu Valley.

Well, I go, and at first I get all the eggs from my chickens, and then I'll go and I'll milk my cows. But only every other day for the goats, because the goats only give milk every other day. I've been playing a really fun simulation game as well. I've been playing a fun simulation game. It's called LA actress. Yes, I just wake up every day, hung over, and I just try, I just sit by the phone.

Uh-huh. And wait. And wait and wait. And wait. And wait and stare. Are you trying to talk about my life? What button is it to cry? I feel like we're bullying Jackie right now, and I just want to apologize.

It's literally your show. That's fine. I accept it. I mean, I played the game. What was the last game we played on Jack and he's dating sims? I got to bang Hellboy Jr. She won. On the dance floor at my prom.

Everybody's watching. After we took off our shirts and we rasseled in front of everyone because we both made fire. And then we went into the bathroom and we banged it out. Yeah, it's a multiplayer dating sims. So me, Kellan, and Jackie all had characters. I was going after the bad girl, ghost girl. Right. I didn't end up with her.

She said no to me to go to the same. dance. And Kellan was going after the Wolfman jock, I believe. Yes. Oh yeah. And also got denied, I believe. Yeah, because he liked cocaine too much. And I think that leads to penis problems. It's a really good game. It's a really good game.

It's actually shockingly very good game. What was that game called? It was great. Monster prom. Can we talk about Gretsuko? Yes, Holden. So I asked Holden to join me on. on page seven and he's like, I know you're gonna talk about things

in the Royal wedding, me, me, meh, and he said, please just watch this anime show and everyone knows I hate anime, blindly, but that's fine. I know, I gave it a shot. My problem is that I'd like to watch TV while I'm doing other things. Right.

So when you have subtitles, I can't pay attention. But this has an English dub. I didn't have an English dub. Mine was just subtitles. You can change, yeah, it has, watch the English dub. Watch the English job then. It's okay, it's about like a plushy. It's by the same people who make like Hello Kitty.

And it's like a plushy kind of fox girl at her office job. And everyone just like shits on her. And everybody's just like an asshole to her. And then at night she goes into this personal karaoke room and lets it becomes Agratzuko. Her day to day is Retsuko and fucking just rips death metal. And in the karaoke room in a karaoke by herself. She has her own microchucco. She carries you around in a purse.

And sometimes she'll bust it out. She'll, like, sneak into the bathroom and do it during work if she needs to, you know? But she just rips death metal. And it's rad, man. So anyways, I just wanted to recommend that to everybody. And Jackie, we're enjoying it. Watch the English dub. Jackie, you'll enjoy it more.

No, I actually really did like it a lot. It's called Agratzuko. And, I mean, it really just shows also the insane amount of rage that lives inside of a woman, especially, like, a lot of it has to do with her boss. It's just, like, like, she doesn't put. pour the tea properly. She doesn't pour the beer properly. She doesn't do anything right. And it's like, that's a woman's job. You need to know how to do these things. And I guess it like really shows like South Korean culture of like you, if you are especially a woman of lower status, you need to be there,

be at work before the boss gets there. You need to stay later than everyone else. It is a very different society, although I guess not that different. But, and then she just like losing. loses their fucking mind. And I actually really identified with this red tiny panda. I liked it a lot. And I hate saying that I like something that I previously ultimately denied

for absolutely no reason. It's very, very good. I think it's a way to get people into the anime. But anyways, that's your Wizard and the Bruiser moment. Check out Wizard in the Brewers. A podcast. A podcast network. There's two guys and they said it all rope.

And then they talk about things. and they don't talk about doom. Doom episode coming out this week, you fucking people that like the opposite of what we talk about. Speaking of it, it's time for the list. What? I can do the song now. Who is on the list? Got a whole that list.

You were so close. You were so close. Really close. It works so hard. This one is for you, and you know, related to Wizard and the Bruiser, celebrities who play Fortnite. Oh, my God. What is Fortnite?

What is this? It's so funny to you bring this up because I literally have a thing on my stream about how I don't play Fortnite and I get asked do I play Fortnite literally like every day on my stream and I actually don't play Fortnite because some little kid came into my stream and was like a real asshole and his whole thing was how I need to be playing Fortnite and so that I blame this 12 year old cyber bully for the reason why I don't play it. You gotta let that shit go, go, Holden. You can't listen to all the 12 year olds.

You can't. Someone told me once, take all the mean things people say to you and harvest it and harness it and let it sit inside and let your power be based on the evil of the world coming at you.

I forgot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's the healthy way to do it. Who needs therapy? You don't need therapy. Garden State. You just need love. Okay, don't you bring up

his team. No therapy, no medication. It's just love with a girl wearing a helmet. That'll fix everything. Remember the part where they scream? into that hole. What a fucking novel moment.

But that made it so much better. That helps so much. It's Thera fucking Pudic. Thank you very much. And you're going to give me shit about liking Garden State, Mr. Lala Land, who watched it for like,

what, the hundredth time while Lexi was gone? Friday night. Because you were a loser? After a Jackney's name, you know what? I'll let you call me a loser, okay?

Because that's 40% completely 100% true. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I called you. No, please. It is 40% correct. And I watch. La La Land again and it's just so funny because in the back of my head like I know why people fucking hate it and I really get why people hate it and I'm just such a sucker for it and I love

it so much and it made me like really like it really misty about like drunken misty over Lexi not being around either too because it's about two like struggling artists you know and Emma Stone can we Emma Stone yeah she is the she has it she's got that thing you like her a lot I mean she has there's something going on there with that with her that is like it's like a it's like a wet dog kind of like the eye like you know what I mean did you just call her a wet dog in a sexual way she's got this big like wet eyes yeah her eyes are like physically wet looking and they're huge yeah like an iguana's eyes yeah love it exposed to the elements

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We can send a new last podcast herb grinder to you while cleaning all mysterious sticky off my chairs. It's Nanners. Go to Stamps.com before you hit the grocery store again to ogle those firefighters. Click on the radio microphone at the top of the homepage and type in page seven. I think you might like it. Anyways, I'm a sucker for classic movies and everything.

And, you know, I just remember, like, people just fucking physically hate that movie. I haven't even watched it. And I just know, I just know I don't want you to just that I can. just don't why I just know I'm not it's not gonna be my style not for you I hate it I'm I'm a sucker for this very specific like sub sub sub genre of like modern day movies that break into classical musical numbers but why didn't they cast two people that can dance and can sing I think that they there's so many intelligent people out there I think and they how they I agree with you you know what I wish they had done and I wish they had done this with Beauty and the Beast as well which another

movie I absolutely loved in which they cast people who don't like at least Emma Watson who doesn't have really like a super good singing voice she has like a solid singing voice um I kind of just wish they just say fuck it let's just dub in somebody who has an incredible singing voice like I would rather that than seeing than having it be like softballed a little bit which I get I feel that when I watch La La La La La Land and Beauty and Beast I still love them but like yeah dancer in the dark um everyone says I love you uh is another one um I love those types of, that weird sub sub-sub-sub-genre of film. I just, like, cannot get enough of it.

It just makes me so happy. I'm like weird now, man. It used to be all, it used to be all like, you're so soft. It used to be all horror movies and all this business. Now I just want like a good, cheesy musical. I want a Disney movie. It's just like, I don't know, man.

Well, you know, Drake plays Fortnite. I can't tell you. I hate Fortnite. I have a weird, irrational hatred of Fortnite's. Let's do that Drake played with Ninja, a professional Twitch streamer. He had over a million people watching his Twitch stream during that stream, and got an obscene amount of subs.

That guy's making like a million dollars a month to play video games. Go on. Chance the rapper. That makes a lot of sense as well. Who I loved his last album. His last album was great. It's very good. What is, but wait, what is Fortnite?

What is it? Like, zombies? Is it like, what is it? Fortnite is a cartoon. version of a game called PubG that I play. It is essentially 100 people drop on an island and you have to try to be the last person alive. Like Battle Royale.

It is Hunger Games. Yeah, it is Battle Royale Hunger Games. But just watch Battle Royale because I imagine that's a lot more fun than playing the game. Battle Royale rules. Yeah. I love that movie. Everyone should watch that movie.

It is very cartoony. And also, it's a bit Minecrafty. You construct things and build things to like, yeah. And that's kind of what sets it apart. That and the cartooniness are what set it apart from Pluronones Battlegrounds. the game that I really enjoy. Keep going. I'm asleep, I'm asleep, but yes, continue. I'm trying so hard to, like, breeze through the

I like the video game shit because this is not the place for it. Joe Jonas. Oh, of course, please. Roseanne Barr. So she tweeted about it. It felt very, like, her trying to be up with the kids or whatever, but yeah, she talked about how I guess she always wins Fortnite. I have 20 Fortnite

Victory Royale wins. Which is such a weird technical way to write that that makes it sound like a publicist wrote that so that she could seem like with it. Anyways, go on. Triple X-Tentation. Triple X-Tentation. Is that a wrestler?

He's a rapper. Triple-X Tentation. Mm. Oh, I know all about that, rapist. Yeah, he does corn rap, I believe, or he's always in cornfields rapping about corn. I remember him. I know of him. Also, rapper 6-9.

That's a good one. Yeah, yeah, it's sexual. Also, speaking of sex. I realize how horny you are these past couple of weeks, Holden, because you asked me to listen to Holden and I go back and forth with awesome pop divas, just the divas in general, and he told me to start listening to Cupcake with 2Ks. And I thought I was the horniest woman in America. I listened to Cupcake, and I dig it hardcore, but wow, she is sexual.

You think that, like, the lady rappers of, like, the 90s were over the top? like, holy shit, this woman is. But also very sex positive. She's got that one song where it's like, girl on girl, boy on boy, like fuck the world. She's talking about, you know, the rap culture's, like, awful about, you know, homosexuality and stuff.

And that's really awesome. But yeah, she is horny. I feel like she's amazing. I feel like if Lizzo and I had a love child, it would be cupcake. It's just like upping, like, how positive and sex positive and everything. And then just like making it dirty. as fuck.

Woo! It is like, it got me, like, it gave me the vapes while I was listening to it. Is it the one with the, where she's just talking about

she just loves like drinking gum or something like that? Drinking gum that she's like, yeah, she's like, she's like I swallowed some kids. No, make that twins. Oh my God.

Like. Yeah, she's great. It's all about just like drip, dropy. It is, I like it a lot. Tripped dropy. But I definitely,

I felt weird while I was listening to it at Petco, you know? Norm MacDonald plays Fortnite. Yeah, he, okay, he writes for Roseanne. I think he was doing that kind of as a joke. Ah. I don't think he actually plays Fortnite. Is Reese Witherspoon on this list as well, by the way?

I'm not sure. She recently also tweeted about Fortnite. She tweeted, though, about, I think, how her kids play it, but still, it is obscene how many celebrities are talking about this video game. It's really weirding me out. All right, keep going. That's pretty much it. I mean, all the rest of them are, like, basketball players.

Dead Mount. That's pretty cool one. Basketball players have apparently they've gotten to the point where they literally have banned Fortnite from locker rooms because it's fucking up their game. It is insane.

This game is blowing up so crazy hard. And of course, I'm Mr. Mean Old Man who doesn't play it at all. It is a free-to-play game also, so that's a big part of it. They just released it on mobile as well, so it's on phone and tablet and all that stuff. Is it a pay-as-you-go type of game?

I think it's more like a pay for fun skins and stuff. And people really, you know, it's that free-to-play model of, like, cosmetics, like, if you want it. But little kids are ridiculous, so, like, they all bully each other into buying the skin because you're not cool if you don't have the stupid skin, you know what I mean? But also, it's also so huge because, A, it's very much for kids in a way that it's, like, very cartooning and everything. And it's also, like, little kids don't just have, like, video game money on hand, right? PubG is, like, 30 bucks, which is just enough to be, like, not something you're

mom's just going to necessarily go buy you so you can download this for free it's on all consoles it's on PC it's on everywhere hmm wait did you say that smouse plays fortnight dead mouse oh okay remember smouse from angry boys smouse because you're talking about skins and everything smouse is pretty great angry boys look your elbow i don't think i ever i that was the one i didn't quite get what's the guy's name i love um you're talking chris lily god i love i love uh what is it High School High. Dude, watch angry,

yeah, high school, and then also Angry Boys. But the late, no, but the other one where he's the

girl, what's the popular girl or whatever? Oh, I was screaming about Bogans. What's her name? Like, Jeannay or something? She,

I saw that show as well. That is fucking hilarious. Oh, Jemé. Jamey is what his private school girl. Because it's Jamie, but she makes everyone pronounce it Jameh

because she's like trying to be all. But also Jonah from Tonga is pretty amazing. Like his other character. Jonah is great. Chris Lilly is fucking. insane. He's brilliant. He is the best. Yeah, he's brilliant. Man, they can do

anything in Australia. Yeah. They've got tons of stuff. They have boats there and airplanes. They've got factories and steel mills. Shut up. All right. Okay. It's time for blind items. Blind items. We gotta find them. I can't see. I am a blind, man. It's how we can't see them old. It's all we can't see them.

Oh, okay. Sorry, I'll do that again. Ah! We can't see them! Thank you very much. Which TV host, who, until very recently, had a daily presence in our lives, is disappearing to get help with a terrible flatulence problem. The TV talker has been known to clear a set with the nasty smell that follows him around. Most people think it's brought on by extreme dieting.

Needless to say, the studio will be a much nicer place to work, where its host can now literally wake up and enjoy it. Enjoy the coffee, the smell of the coffee, I mean. Wink. Yeah, daytime, right? Yeah, daytime. The smell of the coffee thing throws me off. I was going to say Dr. Phil, Jackie.

It's more a morning show. Ryan Sechrest? No, it's a morning show. He's been around for forever. What color is he? You know. Whoa. Steve Harvey.

He is a black man. Steve Harvey. No, no. Who's with not Kathy Lee, but then she got replaced? Not Michael Strayhan. It's not Michael Strayhan. Well, Michael Strayon is not on that show anymore. It's not Steve Harvey?

It's not Steve. No, think of a morning show. He's on morning shows all the time. You kind of look at him and you think that's a real farty bitch up there on that screen. That's a farty bitch up there. Oh, no, no. Oh, he eats and cheese. Oh, yes, I want a farty bitch up there.

Does he like weather? Yes. Okay. What's his name? Oh, Al Roker. Of course. Because, you know, he's real bad. with the dieting, and apparently his extreme dying

is causing many a fart. I can't think of El Roker not as the Charlie Brown character. That's something that I can't undo in my mind as him dresses Charlie Brown. I saw those recently. It's so awful and perplexing and terrifying. And I know it was years

ago, and it's still something I can't get off of my fucking brain space. Recently, it was posted again, and was like top front page of Reddit recently. Because it's always ridiculous. I'm looking it up right now. I just always forget how weird and funny it is.

It's so bad and weird. Now you look at it and oh, and now you'd see Matt Lauer's Lucy. Just the amount of people. And I know that crazier things have happened under the watch of a lot of people, but the amount of people that had to say yes and be like, this is fine. This is good. But his outfit, the weird squiggly's on his forehead.

It's so upsetting. What's the stinky? the lady who does Pig pin. Pig pin is one of the worst most disturbing. I think that's the worst one for me. Pigpin is disturbing in that.

Yeah, with the cloud of dust underneath it. That was in 2015, too, and it still haunts me to this day. God, it's scary. It is so... Oh, God, yeah. Yeah, Meredith Fiera. That's who played Pigpen, and it is just, who made those efforts? Who said that they were good?

Who allowed them on television dressed like that? You know, you know, understand. That must have taken, like, three hours a person in the makeup chair.

They had to show up at, at 2 a.m. probably. To get that done, they're like, it's going to be so good. And then, you know,

I've been in these kind of makeup chair scenarios before. You know, the whole time they were like, this is looking so good guys. So good. Amazing. Everyone's talking about how awesome they look.

Yeah, but I forgot, too, that, like, Matt Lauer dresses Lucy. Like, he's in the psychiatric help booth. Yeah,

like the five-cent one. And he's, like, trying to seduce Al Roker's Charlie Brown as he's hitting a football. And it's so uncomfortable and it's so awkward. And, you know, it just hurts from the bottom of my stomach. And the Kathy Lee and Hoda Woodstock and Snoopy. Yeah. I think the Woodstock is the worst. Oh, my God.

Yeah. Yeah. Dude, I think it was made, it reminds me a lot, actually, of, and I was actually watching this when I was home with Lexi's family for the holidays. the live action Grinch Who Stole Christmas. And you forget how disturbed. That movie is disturbing. It's weird. And it looks like the same makeup people actually.

But man, that movie is actually very fucked up. Like the Hoos and Hoofil are horrible, evil people. And it's very weird. Especially Faith Hill's rendition of Where Are You Christmas. Yeah. That's also just as upsetting as the child singing, Where Are You Christmas? And yeah, Christine Bransky, bitch.

Yeah. Super Uber bitch. You should have fucked that Grinch. You have sex with that Grinch. Sucked his dick, she should have. Sunked his dick, she should have. And the other one we got today, this permanent A-List singer is trying to get pregnant. But her management team are doing everything they can to keep that from happening,

including certain pills in her daily regimen of pills. Katie Perry? No. Been around much longer than that. Okay. too long but since we were in high school at the very least since we were in high school and you said that you said a singer a la singer permanent a mania twain no brittany but i don't think it would be britain it's brittany it's brittany it's brittany oh wow we're trying to get pregnant

again but they they are uh apparently popping some pills into that daily pill regimen she hurt the control over her is so terrifying i'm really honestly kind of want to shoot what For her to pass away and then 10 years later just to find out everything that's been going on with her career. She's like locked in a weird contract, right? Oh, yeah, but at the same time, I'm really happy with her and her boyfriend because I follow them on Instagram. And she just looks so genuinely happy. And on Mother's Day, there was this whole, like, video of her painting with her kids. And it looks like her kids actually enjoy her a lot, which is very cute.

Yeah, she took a picture of her kid dressed as Frisa from Dragon Ball. doing a jump kick outside and like supporting his love of of the anime to bring that back up one more time and I thought that it's really nice do you say it anime is that how you're supposed to say I'm being an asshole by saying it like that I'm not saying it like that because that's how you're supposed to say it oh okay oh hello the bar is for celebrity parenthood her children seem to actually enjoy her presence I know it's bad but it's true she took a picture of one one time yeah Seriously. I think that it's nice. Also, I've been lately following Josh Brolin on Instagram, and you should definitely do yourself a favor and follow Josh Brolin on Instagram. He's fantastic.

And if you want to follow a very odd, somewhat unsettling Instagram, but you can't quite put your finger on why it's unsettling, John Traj joined Instagram just a couple of weeks ago. And why is it so weird? Why is it unsubbed? I think it's because he's all over Instagram. I feel like he's posting all the time. And also, I'm fairly sure it is him that is posted. I'm almost positive.

It's because John Trae has a tone. Yes. It's very weird. It's very disconcerting. Also, like, the reasons of why he's posting things, I feel like everything's all out of order. I don't really understand. He doesn't get it.

But I do appreciate that I don't think it's a publicity team that's doing it. I don't think it is either. And it is completely. out of order. I think someone told him he needed to do it to promote Gotti because about every fourth or third picture is of him either at a Gotti premiere or a still from the film Gotti. But all the rest are just odd pictures throughout the years of him and his wife. I always just, when I see him now, I can only see the Scientology movie, the Battleship Earth character.

Yes. Battlestar Galactica. No. Battleship Earth. Yeah. Battleship Earth. Right. I always just see him with the big dreadlocks and like the way too big weird hands. Yeah. Like I just, I don't know. By the way, I was just looking at Brolin's Insta.

And my God, his wife is attractive. Right? And he loves her so much. Of course, yeah. It's like they had like they post videos of them like singing before they had coffee. And she's just like laying in bed and neither one of them sound good. Like I just, I love his love. I love everything about him.

He does a fake. like workout videos where it's just like him just like it looks like he's benching a bunch and just like uh-huh and it just like pans out and he's on the toilet you know oh that's cute it's great it's fun well i really liked him as thanos yes and uh and avengers infinity war and actually i will say he's essentially you'd like this jack he's essentially the main character of the movie and he does almost kind of the impossible by giving like a real kind of understandable-ish uh motivation for his character's evil ways. And yeah, it's very, very well done.

Very, very good acting feat. He's actually very good in Deadpool, too. Yeah, he needs to see Deadpool, too. He's very good. It's about, I would say, three quarters pretty awesome. About a quarter super hacky and lazy. Yeah. But for the most part, it's really good.

Yeah, I really need to see it. But yeah, yeah, you should really start watching more comic book movies. Yeah, Jacko and Jackie. And that's all we got for today's page seven. Thank you, everyone, for tuning in. Wow, we got to talk about video games, anime, and fucking comic book movies. Yeah. Everything for you.

It's all for you, Holden. Thank you. Thank you so much for being here with us today. Please check out The Wizard and the Brewster and Last Podcast Network. It is an amazing show. I don't listen to it, but I know that it's wonderful because I know a lot of people that listen to it that really dig it hard and I am very proud of you hold it for doing all that. Thank you.

Almost more importantly, Jack and he's dating sims every Friday night, it is like the combination of Wishing the Bruiser and Page 7 all in one place playing romantic dating games, getting horny and hammered for your entertainment. It's a lot of fun. Yeah, that's at twitch.tv slash holdonators ho. And if you would like, please check out our Patreon page. I'm constantly posting weirdo content on there at patreon.com slash page 7 podcasts.

And if you're into it, follow me on Instagram at Jack that worm, Holden. At Holdenators, I think. It gives a shit. I don't think. Oh, Instagram, Insta's Holden MCN. All right. Twitter's at, yeah, either way. Yeah, and at Margus Sparks.

Hell yeah. Thank you guys so much for listening. And we'll see you next week.