Page 7 - Episode 325: Slug Sisters

Episode Date: October 18, 2019

We goss about Zoë Kravitz getting cast as the new Catwoman, our deep love for Billy Porter and how high maintenance we'd be if we were Mariah Carey level divas.      Big ups to all our Patreon su...pporters! Want to help out Page 7 and get oodles of bonus content? Support us today!   Go to http://framebridge.com and use promo code PAGE7 and you’ll save an additional 15% off your first order.   Go to http://honeybook.com/page7 for 50% off your first year.   Just go to http://stamps.com, click on the microphone at the top of the homepage, and type in PAGE7 to claim your special offer today!   For 15% off your purchase of $100 or more including sale items through the end of October, go to http://modcloth.com and enter code page7 at checkout.       Bossa Antigua, Bossa Bossa, Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 We're doing a song altogether because Natalie infected us. Why? And you fall and you talk. Does she say, she doesn't say masturbated? I think, I only think she says, you da, hava, hava, yeah. That's a, I don't know, I don't get. Yeah, yeah, I think it's a different language that part.
Starting point is 00:00:50 Natalie, actually, very important question that I didn't realize I had for you. Did you ever wear socks on your arms? Ah. No, I was in the punk scene at that point and there were a couple girls who wore socks. on their arms, but it was because of heroin. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, I don't. Yeah, oh, I never thought about that.
Starting point is 00:01:09 Yeah. That's kind of handy. Yeah. Yeah, it's a cute accessory for your drug addiction. Is that what scrunchies are for? Oh, my God, that's why scrunchies are in. It's because heroin's back on the sea. Yeah, everybody's wearing them on their elbows.
Starting point is 00:01:24 I'm gonna, yeah, bow crunchies. I like my bows, crunchy. Uh-huh. That's not. I'm cool. Hey guys, welcome to page 7. My name is Jackie Soproski. Hi, everybody.
Starting point is 00:01:36 My name is Holt McNeely, and I'm just letting Jackie run with it today. I'm giving her the ball, and I'm just saying, you know what? You're on fire today. Just take it and run with it. Please don't do this. I'm Natalie Jean, and my voice is a little scratchy today, so it was extra special that I got to sing at the beginning. I think that you sound sexualized in a fun way.
Starting point is 00:01:57 Thank you. You're welcome. Maybe it's because we're all smoking cigarettes. again. No. Oh no. I have dreams about that all the time. I have anxiety. Anxiety dreams. Yeah. No, I get, I get them constantly and I wake up and I smell all my clothes. I'm like, I didn't. I didn't. I didn't. I didn't do it. And I'm proud of you. But the problem is I've been rewatching Party Down and they smoke cigarettes in it that it makes me, there are certain shows, and not every show, but BoJack
Starting point is 00:02:21 Horseman and Party Down makes me want to smoke cigarettes. But I feel a little nihilistic sometimes I want to pick one up, but then I don't really. Because then I'd just be sick afterwards. That new Joker movie, I was just like, ooh la la, let me have a mental breakdown while smoking the tobacco. I'm so hot. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah. No, I know exactly what you mean because he smoked so many cigarettes in that movie.
Starting point is 00:02:44 But then I just kept thinking about all of the movie times herbal cigarettes that they have to smoke. And have you ever had to smoke one of those because they hurt like, fuck. By the way, I want to mention the moment that I heard about Henry watching the Joker in the movie theater where a man sat, behind him near the end of the movie and he got up and watched the ending of it by the doorway by the doorway because he was scared because he was stoned and alone and I think that should be the new naked and alone it's called stoned it alone and it's a following people that get really stoned and go go to the movie go to places where there's frequent mass shootings at the airport yeah no I'm oh my problem is I fly so often and yet still I always get way too
Starting point is 00:03:31 stoned before I get to the airport. And then I regret it. And then I'm in the TSA and I was like, why did I do this? Why have I done this to myself? But when you get to the bar and you're just at that and you breathe that breath of relief and slam whatever alcoholic drink you need to slam to make yourself okay with being how high you are, that is a good feeling, that moment. I don't drink at the airport, though. I get sickies on the plane. Yeah, that's the problem with drinking on the flight or before the flight is by the end of
Starting point is 00:03:57 the flight, you're either hammered or you're sobering up. And then you have to be sick for the rest of the day. Man, I remember that one time we did, Henry and I did that. We got hammered before we were on our flight from New York to Florida for Christmas. And of course, my mom always shows up with, like, the whole family, and they wait at the airport to pick us up, and they get so excited. And Henry and I got hammered. I threw up through most of the flight because we were so drunk when we got on the plane.
Starting point is 00:04:25 And then also not only sobering up, but feeling bad, and then just being like, like, showered, with love and attention, which is nice, in theory. But it's not. A lot of questions. So many questions, and you're just like, yes, yes, yes. I love you too! We just asked you if you have AIDS?
Starting point is 00:04:46 Is that your... Maybe. Maybe. I don't know it all. I don't know if I shared the needle. Mom, I'm sorry. And then you cry all the way home. And then you wear socks on your elbows. And they, oh my God, we have our bows crunchies.
Starting point is 00:05:00 Sox in the hands. Socks on the hand. That's the, if the face ain't listening, right? Sox on the hands. If I don't care about what someone is saying, just slowly putting socks on my hands. Okay, I see what you're doing. I see what you're doing there. Okay, girl.
Starting point is 00:05:19 And I get it. All right. You are uninterested of what I have to say right now about fall. I get it. Okay. I got it. Natalie, how is your 31 for 31 Horror Fest going?
Starting point is 00:05:37 Good. Doesn't sound like it's a job. It is a part-time job trying to keep up with this. You know what it is? After we went on a fun anniversary weekend. Happy anniversary, by the way. Thank you. Thank you. I was waiting.
Starting point is 00:05:54 We went on a little, it was our first year anniversary of our wedding, and we went on a little trip, and then Henry had to go. go shoot and then trying to catch up on life after being gone for no more than three days. Yeah. I have not been able to do anything at home, including watching a movie. I understand. I haven't.
Starting point is 00:06:14 I don't think Henry's still keeping it up. Good for him. On his shoot. On his shoot. And by the way, when Natalie says shoot, she actually means nowadays he has to go to a gun range for long periods of time and just fire guns off until he sort of feels as he puts it normal again. Yeah, I didn't know that's what he meant at first, but I realized now, as his wife, when he says he's going on a shoot. I think it may, you know what, as long as it keeps his head under control, I am fine with it. That's how I feel about anyone.
Starting point is 00:06:44 But ever, I just imagine him even trying to hold a gun and being like, ha, ha, ah, ah, ah. He wants to get a gun in the house, and I told him he can't until he's, he's just, his problem is that he just wants to be able to take care of you if you are ever assaulted, but you are a, a stunt woman and you could definitely a thousand percent take care of yourself and take care of him. I do also think that he does want to just have a gun and just like stroke it sometimes, you know, just like look at it and feel the steel under his hand. The problem is it just makes me think of Robocop and how, like, I just imagined him playing with it so that he could spin it and put back into the holster. But then that's how people like, yes.
Starting point is 00:07:24 Shoot their toes off. Yes. Yes. It would be pretty funny. Yeah, I just dropped Robocop. By the way, guys, I just wanted to let you guys know that I read two Batman comics over the weekend. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:07:39 You are such a dork. I'm nerd girl now. Podcasts, they're just like us. They're just like us. They read Zoo Batman Comics, and it's not because it's not a how do you like your egg situation from Runaway Bride. It's because Godfaddy was telling me about this. I guess it's like the comic, the Joker,
Starting point is 00:07:59 like when they originally pulled the inspiration from it, it's called The Killing Joke. Yes, by Alan Moore. And, yeah, it's sort of, it's an origin story for the Joker. Alan Moore, of course, prolific with the watchman and his run on Swamp Thing. I'm actually reading right now. He's a wizard, by the way. He's a wizard, oh, then. A self-professed wizard, and he looks like one, too, but go on.
Starting point is 00:08:22 Wait, what kind of wizard does he look like, like a sexy wizard? Like a warlock, you know what I mean? Like, no, I wouldn't say, well, I guess darkly. Oh, he looks so smart. Oh, my God, his hair. Oh, he's ethereal. Wow, like the wind blowing photo. Wow, he is.
Starting point is 00:08:41 I would climb that. Okay. He's definitely got a Hagrid vibe. Yeah. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Yeah, he's a lot of fun. We actually did an episode on him for Wizard in the Bruiser. Killing jokes, great.
Starting point is 00:08:51 You also read, what was the other one you read? Holiday. Holiday. Holiday. How about the holiday killers were like all of them. I don't know. I felt like it was like a very special Batman where it's like, everybody's here.
Starting point is 00:09:01 I know that one. I know that one. And then like Catwoman comes in. And then the Riddler's there. And it's like toothpaste and all that kind of stuff. But you know what? Didn't know. I'm saying this.
Starting point is 00:09:10 I'm going to go ahead in a minute. First, outside of like I read like the Renan Stimpy comics. And, you know, I read I think Rocko's Modern Life comics. Did you ever read Johnny the Homicitomaniaciac? No. I did. My jam. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:24 Why? What happens to that one? Is it like Johnny Bravo? Do you remember Invader Zim? I've heard of it, but I've never seen it. It's the same guy who made Invader Zim, again, was the Brewster did an episode on that as well. And John the Homestadomaniac, it's like this goth kid
Starting point is 00:09:38 that is what the title purports, which is a, he murders people. Yeah, it's a cute little cartoon where there's like lots of murder. Ooh. Oh, okay, I just looked it up. I remember the, and then it does look a lot like Invader Zim. Yeah. Oh, that's cool. I would read that. So now it's like, I'm just trying it out.
Starting point is 00:09:59 Because I'm like, why not? And when it comes down to, like, comic, like, issued comic books, those are the only ones I'd ever read. Because I read, like, Mouse, which is very upsetting. Yeah, mouse is great. And, but I, um, it's really dark. And the way that Goddadi had sold it on me is that he told me, like, kind of what happens with it, what they do with, like, Commissioner Gordon.
Starting point is 00:10:19 And essentially, like, he's on this, like, waney, Zachie, wiki, wiki, wacky roller coaster. Wayne Zaki. Wow! Now I've heard everything. I'm sorry, I should wait till the list to say, now I've heard everything, but wadyzaki. It's a waintyzaki. And it's like, because the Joker really hurts his daughter
Starting point is 00:10:40 and then straps him into this roller coaster to make him mad while he took a bunch of naked photos of her after the Joker had shot her in the stomach and then undressed her took all these photos and then just like made him ride on this roller coaster on a loop. It's almost like the bone crusher. in nothing but trouble, except with pictures of his naked and shot daughter. Yeah, so it's like, I heard that and I was like, well, that's creepy, deep. Actually, technically, it's Wainey Zaki.
Starting point is 00:11:06 And so I decided, and so God that he bought it for me. It's great. I thought that Wainey Zaki was when you urinated yourself in a hall of mirrors. Been there. Done that. Done that, pee-p. No, that's not what it means. But I was excited.
Starting point is 00:11:26 So how do we guys, how do we guys speak? Me guys, me guys feel very excited for gossip celebrity style. What is wrong with you? Don't give me the ball. Someone take the ball away for me today. I don't deserve it today. You're our mommy. I'm the mommy.
Starting point is 00:11:46 I'm taking the ball away from you, but oh my God, what's this? I'm giving you a bigger ball. Oh, no. I can't put my mouth on this ball. This is like what being a mom is, I think. where you don't feel like being the boss and you've got screaming people in your face, but then you still have to be in the charge.
Starting point is 00:12:05 You just have to keep going, keep going. But then when, I mean, I guess, technically, it is before noon and the drinking has already started, which I imagine is what would happen if I was a mom. Yeah. Always drinking, never smiling. No, I'd probably smile after I got drunk.
Starting point is 00:12:21 But Zoe Kravitz is going to be the new cat woman. Oh, my God! I live in a home, with people that are very invested in this is going to be in the new Robert Pattinson movie and if you listen to last week's Brighter Side with Henry and I on it about obesity
Starting point is 00:12:39 we, Henry talked about a lot that if you were fatter he would be the new penguin in the new Batman movie with Robert Pattinson as Batman. But he's not and I think there's I guess this talk is going to be Jonah Hill. Yeah, which he would love to hear.
Starting point is 00:12:55 Oh no, I hope that's not true. That is it. I'm not very. We're on I think it's actually very true. Yeah, real, real upsetting. It's going to be a dark day. He's also, Jonah Hill's also in talks to be starring in the Dr. Robotnik
Starting point is 00:13:11 origin story. Just called the Eggman, which is coming out in 2022. Egg man. They're going to get there at some point. Yes, they definitely will. I thought Jonah Hill also lost weight, though. He goes back and forth.
Starting point is 00:13:26 He doesn't. He fluctuates. Yeah, but then so it's going to be Zoe Kravitz. But the things at first when I heard it, I was like, hell yeah, Zoe Kravitz, you fucking get it, because apparently she's also the voice in Lego Batman of Catwoman. But she was up against Zazi Beetz, and I fucking love Zazi Beetz so much,
Starting point is 00:13:45 and it made me very sad that Zazzi Beetz is in Atlanta. She's in another one of the, another horror, what is it? I mean, superhero. She was in Joker? Wasn't she? Yes, yeah, yeah. She's the woman in Joker. She's great.
Starting point is 00:13:57 She's really solid. she's an amazing actress so she was up against Zazi Beetz for the role and I really would have rather had seen Zazi Beats in it because I think that I in my head I want to have so much
Starting point is 00:14:10 sex with Catwoman and I've always wanted to have so much sex with Catwoman and I think it's really what it is I'd rather have sex with Zazzy Beats than I would with Zoe Cravitz Zoe Kravitz I guess my load has already been blown figuratively to Michelle Fifer so for me it's like
Starting point is 00:14:28 Like, I can't picture another masturbation-worthy catwoman greater than her. Yes. Yeah, and also with Zoe Kravitz, it would be awkward because isn't her stepdad, like, one of also your favorites? Jason Momoa. Yeah. When Jason Momoa came out, and he's just like, he's so proud of her and he's so happy for her. But you can't have sex with him and his stepdaughter because you will just ruin the family. That's why I'm separated from them.
Starting point is 00:14:57 According to Porn Hub, that is not only acceptable, that is actually the most desired outcome. Yeah, it's encouraged. I know, I know. What, stepfather and stepdaughter? Just any step, anything. I can't even look at porn sites anymore. It is all family. It is definitely all.
Starting point is 00:15:11 It's so gross. Why do they need us to do that? I don't understand. I guess people just need whatever is the only taboo. They need to be perverted in order to check off. I mean, I'd rather that than, you know, I mean, I know that I talk about my daddies a lot, but I'd rather that than. like babies, like baby daddy daddy's.
Starting point is 00:15:31 Like baby babies? Like the ones that are like 18 but look like they're probably, they look like they're 12. Oh, well yeah, I mean, that'll never go away completely probably, but I don't know. I think I'd rather watch step kid and step parent at least. Adult step kid? Yes. Yeah, I'd rather adult. I guess if my options are child looking girl or adults. Always have to choose.
Starting point is 00:15:54 Family members. I mean, honestly, there was this whole thing where I, did I talk about, I talked about this recently. I was listening to an interview with this guy who did a bunch of research on porn hub and different porn sites. And it is actually true. If you are a porn actress in like your 30s, it's harder to find work because right now it is either milf or girl. And there's no like, totally in between.
Starting point is 00:16:16 And as a man who's in his 30s, I'm looking for what they can't get, you know, the actresses that are, you know, having a harder time because I feel weird sort of being turned on by a younger on the younger side um older side that's still fun but sure but i think that's actually a metaphor for our society which is like there's a place for very young girls in a place for like older women which is an older women it's like it sucks but they get there's a position for them right and women in their like 30s and 40s are just kind of like what do you want from us like we're only supposed to be like these receptacles of like children i actually really enjoyed it too I was just watching, I don't know if you're caught up with Big Mouth,
Starting point is 00:16:58 but in Big Mouth season three, the Menopause Banshee comes in, and the Menopause Banshee is played by Carol Kane, and, like, he's voiced by Carol Kane, and it made me so happy, because it's actually, like, pro-menopause was like, you can fuck whenever you want. Oh, yeah, I'm all about it.
Starting point is 00:17:16 It's like, you don't have to worry about any of that shit ever again. Like, it's a pro-menopause stance, which is, and it's like, you can scream, and people will listen to you. We're ahead of the game on this. Remember, we tell you. talked about this like a month ago at least we'd said we there should be menopause parties oh yeah yeah yeah it should be a celebration i'm so about it i think because like for many generations
Starting point is 00:17:37 it was sort of the idea was women were like you are just creating other people and then you're done your job's over but that's not really i saw the witch i know what they want us for that's not actually when life is the best like as a chick 30s and 40s 50s 60s like you're rocking it it just gets better and better, better. Fuck that shit. Hell yeah. I wish I could go through menopause. Yeah, thanks, Holden.
Starting point is 00:18:01 You're welcome. You're welcome, ladies. He's so woke. Oh, my God. I'm so, like, on it. That's what everyone in the internet says about me, how woke I am. Everyone says it.
Starting point is 00:18:12 They won't stop saying it. You wish you had a uterus just so it could dry up. Like a little raisin inside the air. Right now, Natalie, we've got gushy grapes inside of us. We're making wine I want an egg I want to be an egg I want to be like a bird
Starting point is 00:18:32 with an egg None of it You get none of it You know what we do get to do Whenever we want is watch Candyman Guys I have to talk about it Because I'm very very excited
Starting point is 00:18:44 Because we were watching Candyman On Friday night And I love Candyman Candyman is one of my favorite movies Oh yeah Camden is fucking wonderful And I was watching it with some people that had never watched Candyman before,
Starting point is 00:18:56 which was also a lot of fun. And we just kept talking about how the kid and Candyman is one of the best parts, because he's wise beyond his years. And when she asked him, like, are you scared of Candyman? He just looks at her and goes, I ain't scared of nothing.
Starting point is 00:19:10 And he's great. He's a great kid actor. So over the weekend, Gauthetti and I were vending some of his wares, and this dude walks up and is like, you got none of his, you had no Candyman up here. And Jeff was like,
Starting point is 00:19:23 We were literally just talking about doing a candy man design because we just kept talking about Candyman, and it was the little kid from the movie. And I made me so excited, except for it. He's like, yeah, I'm DeWan Guy. And we're like, what do you mean? I'm sorry, what does that mean? He's like, I'm Dewan guy.
Starting point is 00:19:42 And he kept saying I'm DeWan guy, but I didn't know what that meant. And also, he was saying, I'm the one guy. The one guy. And we're like, but which one? Oh, no. How did he never, how does he not get that? all the time when he says, I'm to one guy. He must.
Starting point is 00:19:56 But it is sort of like a racist who's on first. Right. It was very, and I was like, no, it's great. No, it's totally understandable. Yeah. It was very, it was actually very funny because we all laughed about that. And we made the, and he's like, no, no, no, that's actually my name. And man, did he cap staring at my tits?
Starting point is 00:20:13 Yeah. So I could have slept with the little boy and Candyman. That's fun. What would you, what would you do with them? Would you throw him around? Would you let him take him? I put a hook on my hand. I'd make him wrong.
Starting point is 00:20:23 And then I'd hide in a big barrel of trash, and then I'd have him set me on fire. Well, coincidentally, that's the only way he can ejaculate. He's watching someone being burned to death. Just get a giant man-sized hamster wheel, and you just chase after him with a... Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it was a lot of fun. But I thought that was kind of a fun. And also another Kismet celebrity siting with that.
Starting point is 00:20:48 I thought it was just very... It was kind of fun. Yeah. I think I talked about it on here. but I did the convention with the child's play kid oh yeah no you didn't talk about that on here no no oh oh yeah when I was doing oh when I was deeper in the horror scene oh my god by the way that all said that whole I don't know if you're not getting you did 90 day right now oh yeah all right Natalie please get us off of no you're about to get on you day
Starting point is 00:21:19 uh no just uh when I was doing horror conventions more I was like a guest at a horror convention in Chicago and the other guest was the kid from Child's Play and I could have slug with him as well. Wow! So that would have been a fun sister
Starting point is 00:21:37 bonding moment. That would have been. Would that make us Eskimo brothers? Kind of. Right? I think it's kind of like through horror. I think it makes you slug sisters. I think it actually is what... I love that. Don't put salt on us. Slug sisters. I've got intent.
Starting point is 00:21:53 When you have sex with former child stars of horror films. That makes you a slug sister. No, that just makes, oh, God, it makes me think of Judy Gemstones and the Righteous Gemstones when she said, I just sat up and it was like there was a snail underneath me. Righteous Gemstone is one of the best television shows I've ever seen. It's so good. Judy Gemstone, I think, is one of my favorite female characters. I will say that.
Starting point is 00:22:16 I do got to watch it. Talk about two of my other favorite female characters. Nikki Minaj, even though she just said that she's retired. She did. Is not retiring. She's actually just revealed that she's doing a collaboration with Adele. What? Yes.
Starting point is 00:22:32 I'm sorry, Holden. I didn't even send this to you because it just came out. It came out like an hour and a half ago. I don't think there's any actor or musician who says they're retiring and they actually retire. Yeah. Except for Rick Moranis. I think people should stop, especially if you're a musician. Do I even announce a retirement?
Starting point is 00:22:52 other than just for ticket sales because you never have to actually retire. At any point, you could get on a stage and play a couple songs, and voila, you are no longer retired. So just, I get it because, like, you know, it's a way to get people to like, you know, it's a way to really sell out a lot of shows, but you look foolish. You're crying wolf. Yeah, you're going to want to get on stage again. You're going to want to do it.
Starting point is 00:23:17 It's in your bones. It's in your body. Again, we also say this, but I remember I went to Shania. Twain's good like farewell tour because it's like well if it's the last time I can see should I twain and it worked she's still doing shows yeah yeah yeah she just openly lied and no one can't ever call I mean I guess they call people out but also what are you gonna say yeah you can't really that's the thing is what are you gonna do if they go back do better no stop doing it you bad you liar bad but I also do think it's a lot of fun because I am as
Starting point is 00:23:49 much as I have gotten my feelings about James Corden. I had watched Adele on Carioki because I love Adel so much. And Carpool Karaoke is legitimately great also, just as in general. It is. Also, did you watch the recent chance? Chance the rapper was on one. I haven't yet. I haven't yet. It's delightful. It's just goddamn delightful. And I hate how fucking delightful it is.
Starting point is 00:24:13 And Adele was on and she sang, she had wrapped all of Nikki Minaj's monster lyrics. She did. Right? Yeah. So she's been, so she is a huge fan of Nikki Minaj and I just want to say, go for her.
Starting point is 00:24:25 You get it, girl. The fact that you got Nick, I mean, Adele can do whatever she wants, but I bet she was still excited the fact that she got Nikki Minaj. Yeah. Oh, I bet. And I'm going to listen to the fuck out of that
Starting point is 00:24:36 because I know that we're all excited because Adele is going through this terrible divorce. So that means it's going to be a great album. She needs to you. She can't write songs without ending a relationship. You can feel how much that the songs were,
Starting point is 00:24:49 Right. I love when we were young, which was one of her hits off her last album, but like, girl, I know that it's a lie. Even though I could feel the feelings in the song, but I know it's a lie because at the time she was in love. Yeah, I don't like it. I don't like it. Is that the album that won over lemonade? Yes. Yes, see, that's bullshit. How dare you, Natalie? Don't as a my slug sister. I hold on a mania. I also love lemonade. I just need people to know that. Love a lemonade. I think that's really good. I do. I do. love lemonade. It should have won. You're right. It should have won over that, because especially with everything that Beyonce did, but I do love that Adele was so surprised that she went on stage. It was like, Beyonce, I don't know how I got this and you didn't do it. I don't
Starting point is 00:25:32 hate Adele for it, but Lemonade should have won. Yes. I love how Beyonce, it consistently gets people getting on stage and telling her she should have won the award over whoever won the award. Like, no one else gets that treatment. Because she's Beyonce. She's Beyonce. She can do whatever the fuck she wants. Everybody else just gets there. How do you guys feel, too, when people get up there and they're just like, before I even
Starting point is 00:25:58 accept this, I just want to say all the ladies I was in competition with, you guys are just so amazing. You know, like that weird shout-out. You don't think it's nice? You don't think it's nice? I don't know, because I feel like then they cut to them and they're all kind of like in their head. They're just kind of like, you know. You could do it in a way that's actually very catty because then they do cut to the people
Starting point is 00:26:19 who just lost and you just look at them going like, oh, yeah, thank you. That's why if I ever win anything, like until all the ladies I'm up against, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, I'm the winner. I'm the fucking winner, bitches.
Starting point is 00:26:32 That would be so delightful. You got to know where to frame them. Know where to hang them. No where to send your prints. Know what frame to choose. You better pick them. some insas that you want up on your wall now, because when you gotta frame some things, boy,
Starting point is 00:26:56 you gotta learn to use Frame Bridge. It took me so long to get it in there. I have to tell you guys about an amazing new service I found called Frame Bridge. They make it super easy and affordable to frame your favorite things from art prints and posters to the travel photos sitting on your phone. Put down that whiskey. Take a card break and get it. get to decorating, because framing just got so much cheaper and easier.
Starting point is 00:27:24 Here's how it works. Just go to framebridge.com and upload your photo, or they'll send you packaging to safely mailing your physical pieces. Again, it's insane, how easy it is. Preview your item online in any frame style. Choose your favorite or get free recommendations from their talented designers. I'm all like, make it work designers! But everybody knows I'm not Tim Gunn because nothing I own is tailored.
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Starting point is 00:31:04 slash page 7. Payment is flexible, and this promotion applies whether you pay monthly or annually. Go to HoneyBook.com slash page 7 for 50% off your first. first year. That's honeybook.com slash page 7. Someday I'm going to be like Meryl Streep and I can do whatever I want. Right. I hope for that. Isn't that the overall goal
Starting point is 00:31:23 of like everybody? Oh, you have to go. I don't get her off the stage. And that will be your and you're accepting. And everyone says, I want to be the girl in the dress. And then I hunged her and squeezed up. And she
Starting point is 00:31:43 Are you the abominable snowman? And I squeezed him and I called him George. I was doing Lenny from a Viconeman, but yes, the abominable snowman in Lidoo's. Which is based on that. Parity of Liddy from a Vyton. Oh, everything's based on. Everything based on it.
Starting point is 00:31:59 But I do really want you to get an award now someday, Holden, so that you can do that speech. So I can do that speech just said, I'm so thankful for every man. And everyone will think like, oh my God, he is such a great actor, because this is how he sounds all the time. How did he get a woman to fall in love with him?
Starting point is 00:32:17 And I just want you to urinate because you're so excited on stage. And then Lexi comes up behind you and starts like strapping the diaper on you. I'm sorry. He's too excited, y'all. I'm very sorry. That's the trick though, right? I actually heard that in an interview. What's his name?
Starting point is 00:32:33 What's the guy in the gay couple and modern family? The one that's slightly bigger. What's his name? Eric Stone Street. He's amazing. and he's a really good on podcast. And he talked about how he would go in and purposely play stupid.
Starting point is 00:32:49 He would go in and be like, they'd be like, there's the mark. Where? What? Wait, you want me to stand right here? And like purposely act like a fucking idiot. And then as soon as they said action, just nail it.
Starting point is 00:33:00 And that's how he said he got. And that's how he gets it. That's how he said he got like a million commercials was doing that trick. He's really funny. Yeah, he's very funny. And he's very talented. And that is to even just,
Starting point is 00:33:11 have the balls to do that in an audition room is so crazy to me like to act like a complete fucking moron and then just turn it on I think that's always what they say too it's like the main thing that you should usually do to get apart is to act and really truly not give a fuck
Starting point is 00:33:27 and that it really does help you get things so maybe that's part of it and uh I don't I mean it's probably a little controversial but he's not he's not actually gay I believe and he's not effeminate at all in his real life And I could see people getting mad about that
Starting point is 00:33:44 But also he does a great job Yeah, he's very good at the show Yeah But also it is weird because if you look up Eric Stone Street Underneath it just says gay for pay Oh, so he's a porn? It's like a porn... No, I think they're making jokes
Starting point is 00:33:58 I think they're making jokes at him For not being gay but also getting a gay man's role I see, I see Which that's not fair You know what, he got it It has nothing to do with him It's the same when everyone ripped apart Russell Crow for him getting cast in Lameiz.
Starting point is 00:34:13 No, I did not like him in Lameiz. And I think that Chauver deserves to have a stronger singer, for sure. But you know what? He can't control that. He got the role. And he did what he could do. I'm with you.
Starting point is 00:34:25 I also, I validate your feelings. Thank you. I validate your feelings. Oh, you weren't talking to me. She wasn't talking to easy. Don't validate me. She's validating my feelings. Your feelings.
Starting point is 00:34:38 Holden and I validate your feelings. And then other people who feel the other way, about it I validate your feelings too. Thank you. You know who doesn't validate anyone's feelings? Mariah fucking Carrie. That is accurate. I love this.
Starting point is 00:34:51 I immediately clicked on this. I saw this headline. It says Mariah Carey had a brutal response to Nick Cannon saying he wants to remarry her, which she didn't really say it. But he was so Nick Cannon was on T.I's podcast last month and T.I. asked if he would ever get married again. And Nick Caden's response was, honestly, I said I would probably never get married again because I'm still working on myself and trying to become a better man.
Starting point is 00:35:18 That's what I said. But if I had to, I already know what that's like. I would go back home first before I had to do it again. And he was in reference to his marriage with Mariah Carey, and they shared two children. And my favorite is Mariah Carey's response to it was just remarry. Wait, remarried. This is him making this up. and silly. What is he?
Starting point is 00:35:42 My last hope? What is he? My last hope is so, it is brutal. This wasn't clickbaiting. If someone read, like, if my ex like, what is she? My last hope? I would be pretty devastated. Like, ouch, ouch.
Starting point is 00:35:58 And you can tell Nick Cannon is mortified. His response, we have an amazing co-parenting relationship. Our kids are so happy. It's calm waters. Let's keep it that way. Let's keep it, keep it calm. Keep it calm. Please. Could you imagine the wrath of that woman? I would be terrible.
Starting point is 00:36:13 He might be a battered husband. I feel like he's traumatized. He must be. Yeah. Did you ever watch her reality show? I mean, she would just openly, there's also all the pictures. There are times that she just pushes her children out of the way so that she could be at the forefront of things. There was a really fun.
Starting point is 00:36:32 Do you guys follow St. Hoax on Instagram? No, but tell me, mom. You should. It's a wonderful Instagram account. But she just, uh, posted a video that Mariah Carey was just taking photos with people and a woman came came up to her She was like on a photo. What's it called the thing that's always it like a red carpet? Yeah, what is the fucking thing called? The step and repeat like a step and repeat and And people were taking photos with her is it like a stop and kiss at the wedding? Yeah, it's a stopping kiss. Okay, she was at a stop and kiss
Starting point is 00:37:00 Stopping kiss the amount of times I heard stop and kiss. I never want to hear that again. Okay, stop and kiss Stopping kiss now stop and suck. Now stop and suck. Now stop it. I'm watching this video right now, and it's kind of amazing. She pushes this woman who was trying to take a photo with her out of the way to get the photo with the next person. She doesn't even look at her. She just pushed her. God, Lord.
Starting point is 00:37:25 She is my favorite monster, though. That's the problem. She is my favorite monster. Oh, yeah. I mean, it's fun. It's fun other than probably for the woman who got shoved, but she was fine. She did, like, hurt. She's fine.
Starting point is 00:37:37 And also, I would so much rather be around. someone that not only acts, but knows that they are a diva bitch. She makes no, she doesn't pretend to be anything else than what she is. So I say Mazel when it comes to that kind of stuff. It's like, you do you, girl, live your truth. Get on it. Because, I mean, the idea that, like, she does like to be pushed on a wheelie chair or something on wheels from her dressing room to the stage when she performs.
Starting point is 00:38:08 and there are many pictures of her doing this. And she's just like, yeah, I'm with you. She's got to stay on the rest of the night. I mean, she doesn't want to walk from there. All right, Jackie, so you've officially reached diva status. What weird diva shit are you going to pull? Oh, my God. Well, I never want to do that.
Starting point is 00:38:26 I don't want to have like the myambialic. I never want the baby bird syndrome, but I have always dreamed of having a Smee type that would try things before. But I wouldn't want to. I want to, I want me, specifically Bob Hoskins. I want Bob Hoskins to come back from the dead, and I want him to try all my food,
Starting point is 00:38:44 but to make sure it's seasoned properly. Like, he has to know my exact taste palate of what I need and what I want from my food, because I know I like more garlic than the average person. And I want extra garlic on everything. So I would like to have Bob Hoskins be my personal food taster. That is a, that's a diva move. demanding that a body be
Starting point is 00:39:09 reanimated. Yes. Oh yeah, yeah, and I don't, maybe if you can figure out a way to get one of them holograms to be able to eat and consume food, it doesn't just go through their ghost body and shit it out onto the floor. Right. I would be very involved. I'm into that. Scientists
Starting point is 00:39:24 listeners, get to work, okay? Get to Steppen. Do you guys have diva things? I'd have a guy dressed up like Superman, just hang out with me and just be like, hey, remember when we like solve that problem with the world? like, yeah, I remember that, Superman. Thank you so much.
Starting point is 00:39:39 And we just high-five every now to get it. Stolen valor. Whoa, stolen. It would be. Stolen valor. They'd be like, hey, remember we saved the world from the Grockman? And I'd be like, yeah, I remember that, Superman. Thank you for your time and energy.
Starting point is 00:39:54 Wait, can I kiss the Superman? I'd kind of let, I'd watch him fuck fans, because I wouldn't be able to because I'm just like in House of Versauch. Yeah, I'm still married to Lexi or whatever. so it would be like when Superbans like hot fans come on be like hey let me have it you know how they're always screaming at me to have it yeah
Starting point is 00:40:13 all those hot girls and then I'd be like you can't have it with me I'm happily married to Alexis but you can fuck Superbant it's your stunt cock Hmm Stunk yeah Wow my my
Starting point is 00:40:27 demands seem almost Does it not involve indentured servitude Because it seems like a whole of ice bulk too I would pay the fucking shit. That's what I'm saying. That's your servitude. They get a, they get a pittance. They get a stipend. See, that's, I would probably hire a staff of people and I
Starting point is 00:40:44 would pay them very well. But they would have to be, like the things I need, I would need to have seltzer at my in my grasp at all times, 24 hours. Someone's following around that has like a cold cooler
Starting point is 00:41:00 filled with seltzers for you? Yes. At all times. And if somebody's not there, I will have series of trap doors all over my house. That's fun. And if somebody doesn't bring it to me, one of those employees is going to go, and they're not going to know which one it is.
Starting point is 00:41:17 They're going to get paid really well. Wait, are you going to have, like, a roulette wheel of staff so that you have to, like, throw knives. You throw knives just like your morticia. That's, I like that. I like that as well. I like the idea, too, of, like, it reminds me of that ninja restaurant in New York City.
Starting point is 00:41:33 It'd be cool to have a house, like, where all of your staff is, like they come out of hidden panels. Yeah. You know, they're dressed like, they're like stealthy and dressed as ninjas. Oh, do they have costume? Like, what kind of costumes would they wear? Can't do Superman.
Starting point is 00:41:48 I already did Superman. Yeah, no, I mean, probably like wizards. Yeah, I think, oh, then you can make your house like it's Harry Potter. Yeah, I could be like house elves, maybe. Oh, do they have to wear Ticos? No, they're not free. Oh, hell yeah. They're not free.
Starting point is 00:42:03 Oh, that's right. Wait, he's not nude. for it. No, they were like little shreds of things that they found. I like the little jingle shoes so then you always know where they are. Yeah, but if it's too much jingling, that's a big no-no.
Starting point is 00:42:17 They have to be careful. Yeah, but that's the good thing about, because when you hit diva status, you also need random excuses to get irrationally angry. So giving them the jingle shoes for a while, it's helpful, but then you can also just be like, fuck your shoes, you know what I mean? Sorry, so much jingling.
Starting point is 00:42:34 Jigling! This infernal jingling. I've always said I always wanted to throw a glass of brandy into a fireplace out of anger. And I think that would be a good. Good reason to do that. I think it's so funny to think about that. Like how many times like our mother, Henry and I's mom would have like, where she was always actually fairly patient and then out of nowhere, we thought it was always out of nowhere where she'd just
Starting point is 00:43:00 like, stop singing! Why do we do? What did we do? Why did you just explode like that? Mom's like, oh, no, it's because you're patient all the time, and we are obnoxious, and we're always loud, and we're always making all this sound that every once in a while, you just got a fucking snap.
Starting point is 00:43:16 Yeah, my mom did that, too, but, like, coldly. And when I was an adult, too, when we'd be around each other, she'd be, like, fine around me, and we'd be having fun, and then she'd have, like, a, she's not a big drinker, but she'd have, like, one glass of wine. Usually it makes her happy. But one every, like, 20 times she does that, I'll just walk into a room, and she'll just go,
Starting point is 00:43:35 I think you're making a lot of bad choices in your life. I don't trust. I don't even know you anymore. Jesus Christ. You're like, why? I was, I just was in, what? I was, I'm fine. I thought we were watching TLC.
Starting point is 00:43:51 We were just smiling. We were just smiling. Yeah. But she's been obviously thinking about that. For a while. For months or years. Oh my God, your mom's just like Joan Crawford. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:03 Just like her. But she never. beat you with wirehanger. She didn't, no. She was not abusive physically. Holden? What about your mother? My mother, I feel like I... Speaking of being cold emotionally. Am I allowed to say that about your mother? I love your mother.
Starting point is 00:44:18 Totally fine. She's great because she even put me in my place at Holden's wedding. That she, um, she at, like, we were talking about, like, we were talking about having kids. I think it was Lexi and your mom and I. And I said something, I was like, yeah, no, it's great because like, you know, Jeff works from home. He's got a studio at home. And, like, so if we ever have kids, she's like, you really think you're responsible enough for that? I was like, whoa!
Starting point is 00:44:41 She's like, I think it's interesting that you guys have all these ideas that you can just have children and that someone will take care of them. I was like, oh, gosh, gosh, and I feel like she's very much, I'm afraid to share too much because what will happen is I'll be talking to her about, like, I don't know, hey, we're going to a festival, blah, blah, blah, and maybe we're going to go to do this or do that. And then she'll text me, like, two days later and take one tiny detail of what I was talking to her about that I would never have guessed. And now all of a sudden, she's terribly worried about that one tiny detail that I could have never foreseen, which just keeps me from sharing a lot. It just keeps me even like, oh, okay, like, because it'll be just this one thing that's been clearly keeping her up at night. They're like, I don't think you should go to the grocery store Thursday. It's a bad idea. It's like, okay.
Starting point is 00:45:29 What? Why? Yeah, what? Yeah. You know what? It's sometimes better just to have a little bit of more of a surface relationship with your parents, and it's fine. 100%. You know?
Starting point is 00:45:38 My mom's a lovely woman. Very sweet, very kind, very loving. We just keep it surface. It was really funny, too, because we recently did, like, fertility test because we are looking towards having children in the future, wanted to see where we were at. And I, like, mentioned that to my mom was like, hey, good news. Like, we're doing pretty good. Like, the results are pretty good. And she was just like, nope, no, we're not taught.
Starting point is 00:45:59 Like, this is not a conversation we have. but I'm like, oh, I didn't think this was... No, this is a bad thing to say. This is a terrible thing to talk about. All right, good to know. Moms, guys. I'm all right. Yeah, moms.
Starting point is 00:46:12 I mean, we could talk about aunties because it is the 21-year anniversary of Practical Magic's release. 21 years. See, I'm just bringing it up because I couldn't believe that it's been 21 years since Practical Magic came out, as those of you guys know
Starting point is 00:46:30 that have listened to the show. for a long time it is one of my favorite movies because I want to be both stocker channing and diane weist and Nicole Kidman and Sandra Bullock and Sandra Bullock looks not a day old not a day old because I was looking so in this so the fact that it's the anniversary practical magic so Sandra Bullock is 54 now and this movie came out 21 years ago so she's around my age and she looks so much better in that movie than I ever have in my entire No, that's not true. It's true.
Starting point is 00:47:02 I think it's speed money. Is that what the problem is? No, you're gorgeous, Jackie. Oh, my God. But I love it though. Apparently in the tequila scene in the movie, they were actually a little drunk because they were using real tequila.
Starting point is 00:47:12 Fun. How great is that? That's fun. I haven't seen this movie in a long time. We should watch it. Please. Practical magic, it holds up. It's great.
Starting point is 00:47:22 And I love, and Stockard Channing and Diane Weiss as the aunties that are just like, I think you guys, like, you guys can use your magic, but please use it for good. and please don't use it for any kind of nefarious ways because of what happens in the movie. Put the lime in my fucking coconut,
Starting point is 00:47:39 and then everyone dies. I was raised Unitarian, and one time we had a Wiccan Sunday school teacher, and she introduced herself by being like, I am Wiccan. I live in a house of witches, and I just want to throw it out there. Never mess with black magic. That is wonderful.
Starting point is 00:47:56 That's awesome. That is awesome. How have you never told me that before? Oh, it's the best. Yeah. One time she was like, oh, funny story. Yeah, one time we had a witch in the house, and she decided to dabble with a little bit of black magic. And wouldn't you know, she released a poltergeist in our home.
Starting point is 00:48:13 And so you'd be doing the dishes, and dishes would just start flying at you. And it was a really terrible time. Like, it was so funny too because she was just so casual about it. And we were all just like, what the fuck are you talking? That's awesome. And actually, it's a good life lesson. It really is. I mean, it's why Henry and I were not allowed to play with the ghost box in our home.
Starting point is 00:48:34 Because Natalie put a firm foot down, I think it's true. If you're going to open up something, know how to close it properly. Uh-huh. Because you never know. And it really, I mean, it's why we were raised. We weren't allowed to touch Ouija boards. We were not allowed to touch Ouija boards in the house. And so I remember one summer, I think I've, have I talked about this on here?
Starting point is 00:48:50 One summer, Henry and I made our own Ouji board, and my mom found it. And she flipped the fuck out. She's like, nothing is even, she's like, I'm not talking about bullshit. Ouji boards that you. that are made by Hasbro. I'm talking about, like, this is so much worse. You making your own Ouija board.
Starting point is 00:49:05 She's like, even though, like, you don't know what powers you possess. You don't know what you're capable of doing. You never make your own Ouija board. She's right. But now we fucking do this shit all the time. Mom! Mom! I'll do all the black magic I want.
Starting point is 00:49:23 So Natalie, are you saying I shouldn't have farted on your ghost chair? I'm just saying you, you might, you might be. in some sort of relationship with the ghost in that chair. Now, I don't know how it works. That's why I keep getting those midnight invisible dick sucks. Yeah. Finally, it makes sense. But also they keep thinking that your belly is a cake,
Starting point is 00:49:43 so they keep doing cake parts on your stomach. My belly is a cake. Uh, having nothing to do with this conversation, I do need to talk about because I was very excited. that Billy Porter just got the role as the fairy godmother in Sony's live action version of Cinderella. I love it.
Starting point is 00:50:07 How? I had heard that Camia Cabello. Camilla Cabello. Camilla Cabo. She was so good on S&L. By the way, recently, I love her. I got to see her live. She opened for T. Swift.
Starting point is 00:50:22 And she blew me away. I am so excited for her for this part. And she totally looks like. She's playing Cinderella. Yeah, she totally looks like a Cinderella. And Billy Porter, of course, as well. I still need to see Pose. I know, we got to get into Pose.
Starting point is 00:50:37 That is one of my next ventures. There's just been so many things coming out. So much. That now that I'm behind on Pose, I need to set days aside. So after my 31 for 31, that seems like a great, you know, November thing to get into. But also, Billy Porter's been into just so many things. I love Billy Porter very much. and my Christ's
Starting point is 00:50:59 fashion sense Oh he's great I love it Oh my God I love him And him is the very godmother I just I'm very excited And I'm excited
Starting point is 00:51:08 And I feel like everything That has been in Every single Celebrity gossip site everything is all about Disney right now Because Disney Plus is coming out Because Disney owns Our brains
Starting point is 00:51:20 Our bodies and our souls So everything is about Disney But this is one of the ones That I'm very excited about but it's hard not to fall into the hype tractor. I feel like I'm just a husk. I'm a husk on a corn. Just wait to be sucked up by a tractor.
Starting point is 00:51:36 Is that what tractors do? I don't think that's how corn works. Yeah. They suck up corn. Do they suck up corn? Yes. I think a farmer could probably point out about eight things incorrect about what you just said. They shoot them out at the grocery store.
Starting point is 00:51:52 So the tractor comes in. My body is a husk. And I am excited about all this fucking Disney Plus. I've already purchased it. I have purchased Disney Plus already. When is it launched? November 12th. Okay.
Starting point is 00:52:06 Did you see the list of movies that are going to be on Disney Plus? Disney Plus, I'm sold. I can't be any more sold. I'm scared of how sold I am on this because did you watch the trailer for Lady and the Tramp? Oh, man. Oh, my. It looks so good. And the tramp looks just like my parents' dog.
Starting point is 00:52:31 And I'm just like, it's just, it looks good. When you sent me the trailer, I was like, oh, yeah, fine. Oh, you know, I like dogs. This is probably fine. I was crying by the end of the trailer. Right? This is the problem. I did.
Starting point is 00:52:49 Originally, of course, I was all aboard because they adopted a good amount of pets for the, the creation of this movie, and I think that that's awesome. And I was like, all right, of course I'm going to watch it, whatever, but exactly. I watched the trailer and burst into tears, and I'm so excited. It's the fact that the digital effects, like the CG is so good. Yeah. It's, you do feel like you're watching real dogs do these things. They are real dogs, but obviously there's a lot of imposed images on top of it.
Starting point is 00:53:22 But it's so blended. It's crazy. But it is really crazy. I know nothing about technology or any of these things. I think all of it kind of blows me away. But even the difference between the Lion King and the Lady and the Tramp, where they show so much more emotion on their face that even no matter how much time came in between the creation of both of them, because I know it took years for the Lion King, that it even went further.
Starting point is 00:53:51 Like, it's only gotten even better. Yeah. Yeah. The trailer, it, yeah. It really makes those dogs, like, have human emotions, which I don't really need right now in my life, okay? There's already a lot of things that are making me upset. I know, and it's beautiful.
Starting point is 00:54:08 And even with the Ziamese cats, and I was just like, ooh, that shitty fuck cat. I love that part, too, with the two poodles with the bows in their hair, and it's just like, what are you guys, what are you sisters? Like, that's my wife. Yeah, that was pretty funny. Yeah, that's right. I guess like male, female, they just like dress the dogs up to be what, you know what I mean? Like to be whatever against their will.
Starting point is 00:54:29 But I will say what's making this fucking dog howl is Emma Stone is Crewella DeVille. She's hitting me. Stones hit me in my bone zone. She's my celebrity crush. And I'm all about this. Yeah, she's going to be great Cuella. That's another one that I really was, I rolled my eyes so hard at the idea that Emma Stone was playing Cruella DeVille that I thought that my eyes were going to fall out of my fucking ass. Whoa.
Starting point is 00:54:52 That's how hard. They rolled all the way down my back, and they went up into my ass, and they came back out of my ass. Wow. It's difficult to do, but I am talented. But I didn't realize now that Emma Stone is playing the, it's the origin story of Crowella DeVille. Yes. That's a really fucking cool. And a punk rock origin story in 1970s, England.
Starting point is 00:55:19 I'm all for it. I love her look. this like punky, gauhy look. I love like the makeup and everything. I'm also just, I really am a huge, not just, she's not just my celebrity crush. I think she is my celebrity crush, though, partly because I think she is really talented.
Starting point is 00:55:34 Also, she gives it up to, what's her name? Who, who cemented the kid, going close, calling her the goat. And I think when props are given to like that, it makes me a lot more comfortable with this sort of thing. Yeah, Miss Stone's for sure sexy and very talented. Because she's also, she's funny and she has really good timing on screen. Did you ever see her first thing I think she ever did on TV
Starting point is 00:55:59 where she was on the Partridge family reality competition show? No, but I really, wasn't that called Let's Get Together? Something like that. I remember that. It's pretty fun to see the clip. That's amazing. I didn't realize that she was in that, though. But I'm very excited about this.
Starting point is 00:56:15 And it's also directed by the I-Tanya director, Craig Gillespie. Gillespie. I loved it. Tanya. And she was, and Emiston was so good, I think, in the favorite, too. I think she can definitely handle this role. And, uh, yeah, I Tanya, man, ruled. So good. Yeah. Oh, great. Stamps dodo dot com. Savior of the letters. Brue, new, no, no, do, do, do. Are you Freddie Mercury level mouth and downstairs busy and wish you had the aid of a super speed sci-fi space traveler to take your male life from zero.
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Starting point is 00:59:05 and I'd trust it with my life if I could box up my intentions and send them along to heck and a handbasket via the post office. Right now, our listeners get a special offer that includes a four-week trial plus free postage and a digital scale without any long-term commitment. Just go to Stamps. Click on the microphone at the top of the home page and type in page 7. That's stamps.com. Enter page 7. Thanks to ModCloth for supporting page 7. This offer is only valid for a limited time to get 15% off your purchase of $100 or more,
Starting point is 00:59:40 including all sale items. Go to M-O-D-C-L-O-T-H.com and enter code page 7 to check out. So hurry to get an extra 15% off on all sale items through the end of October. Mod-cloth believes fashion celebrates all women, so their sizes range from double zero to 28. Curves for days is what maize gults, and dresses for years is what Mod-Cloth offers, no matter what size I happen to wear this year. I'm a bit of a weight shifter, they say, and yes, they call me mystic, because I'm the Rebecca Romaine of the Sexmen. Another stretch, guys, coming at you with another stretch. No tricks only treats.
Starting point is 01:00:27 You can practice your best resting witch face from now till October 31st with their spooky chic Halloween looks. I am a thousand witch face, whether I am resting or whether I am rustling about like a big thick leaf. And mod cloths spooky clothes are the bees spooky knees. Down to the creepy-dip accessories too, dude. Butcher, knife, earrings. and dino skeleton earrings. My ears are always where I'm looking for a bone. I'm admit to y'all.
Starting point is 01:00:59 I try to primarily wear Halloween socks every day of the year. So I gotta stock up this time of year. So many great fun socks. The proof is in the pudding, but this pudding is spread eagle and bedazzled all over my tutses. How's the weather down there, Dustin Hoffman? Among almost everything I'm, kill for on modcloth, there are these two skirts I'd suck fang for, and I can't decide which
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Starting point is 01:02:00 So this offer is only valid for a limited time. To get 15% off your purchase of $100 or more, including all sale items, go to M-O-D-C-L-O-T-H.com and enter code page 7 at checkout. So hurry to get an extra 15% off on all sale items through the end of October. But actually, guys, we're already at it. It's time for the list. Oh Oh
Starting point is 01:02:22 Sing it Sing it to me Who's on the list? Jackie! After complaining last week I just want to give a shout out to anyone that sent me
Starting point is 01:02:39 lists over this past week I actually really changed my week It makes it not something that I dread looking for And something that makes me very scared because it is, you know
Starting point is 01:02:50 Last week I shit The bed No, it was great It was awesome It was a nice flashback Another time But I just want to throw out a shout out, especially to the person that threw me the idea that mental floss apparently has a million lists on it, and they do, which is why it shows a very interesting list. 40 fascinating facts about your favorite horror movies.
Starting point is 01:03:13 31 for 31. Also speaking of three from hell, I have not seen yet, but I'm very excited because it came out yesterday. Nice. Yes. Oh, and quickly, I wanted to say, I did the ones that we did watch last, or Satanic Panic and Hockey. both of which are very fun. Satania Panic was great. It is directed by a chick.
Starting point is 01:03:33 Which is great. And Jessica, not Jessica, Rebecca Romaine, not Stamos. Whoa. We're talking about dating ourselves. Rebecca Remain is in it, and she's great. And the only caveat I would say
Starting point is 01:03:48 is that they use the Baphomet incorrectly in the movie. It is not a demon. It is actually a life balancer. But other than that, it's fucking great. You should watch it. And Haunt is also
Starting point is 01:03:57 very silly but very fun to watch. I'll get on it. I'll get on it. Are you been keeping up with Creep show though too? Yeah. God, it's great. It's everything. It's all the zany fun camp that I fucking crave. But did we crave the knowledge
Starting point is 01:04:11 that The Exorcist was the first horror film to be nominated for a Best Picture Oscar? I did not know that. I did not know that either. And we did an episode on The Exorcist. I don't believe we said that fact out loud. Interesting. So if anyone needs the extra information, and come over to page 7 where we have all of the information.
Starting point is 01:04:30 Also, but also if you need the other information, you can go to. If you need less information. Less information. But they also, they earned 10 Oscar nominations, including a best supporting actress nod for Linda Blair, which I had no idea. That's fucking awesome. It is still holds up.
Starting point is 01:04:48 Yeah, one of the best of all time. Good Lord, does it hold up? Did you know that Robert England was not the first choice to play Freddie Kruger? So as Craven reportedly planned to have a stuntman play the seemingly immortal youth hater known as Freddie Kruger, but opted to go with an accomplished actor for the role instead. His first choice was the brilliant British character actor David Warner, who you'll no doubt recognize from Time Bandits, Titanic,
Starting point is 01:05:14 and various incarnations of Star Trek. I have never seen a Star Trek, but I have seen Titanic, and I remember the chap. The chap! Which one is? What are you doing right now? What is happening right now? I'm fucking British, bitch.
Starting point is 01:05:29 You're ball running like a fucking B-I-T-2s the C-H. This is what happened. This man. Oh, it's the jerk? It's, yeah, well, it's the me man. It's daddy jerk. Daddy jerk? It's not the young jerk.
Starting point is 01:05:41 No, it's daddy jerk. Yeah, I could get it. I get on it. But I'm sure he would have done a great job as well. Not as good as Robert England. Robert England is fucking amazing. Did you know that Psycho is the first American film to feature a toilet.
Starting point is 01:05:57 I did. Did you know that? You're a toilet hound. There's a lot of weird. That was one of the things. When I first met Natalie, I was like, what a fucking toilet hound. I know all the toilet facts guys.
Starting point is 01:06:10 I'm kind of a toilet connoisseur. I feel like Psycho was also the one of, if not the very first movie to introduce it. It did the scream thing to introduce the film with a leading actress who gets murdered immediately. Yes. That was really a. new thing and also just showing a bathroom in general and a woman the shower was like a big
Starting point is 01:06:30 controversy yes like they didn't really show bodily functions in any way before that because you just you know they didn't even show like people in bed together like online i love lucy was just because it was all seen as like not it was all seen as like two nobody has genitals yes yeah i'm they hated they hated love back in they did they hated they hated any sort of penetration i get it so do i did you know stephen king was a fan of the Shining. Yes. Yes.
Starting point is 01:06:58 I didn't know that. I thought it was interesting. It is interesting. It's very cool. And actually, I don't know if it's still on Netflix, but there was a really fun documentary called Room 237. It's not on Netflix anymore because I actually missed out on it and I went to go watch it the other day. It's not, you can't stream it.
Starting point is 01:07:15 It's, I don't, yeah, I don't know where if you can find it still, but it's sort of like a conspiracy theory thing about Stanley Kubrick was, about how he was, allegedly he staged the moon landing and this was the movie was
Starting point is 01:07:29 telling you in code that this is what happened but there was also little facts about like because they famously were like feuding during that because Stephen King did not like the movie at all and so there's little things inside the movie that are sort of bites at King
Starting point is 01:07:45 because Kubrick was like fuck you and he did things like the so the bug the Volkswagen bug that's in the book yeah the way it's described, Kubrick puts it in the movie and it's like a crashed car in it.
Starting point is 01:08:02 So it's like the description of the car that's supposed to be in the movie he showed is like broken. Like little things like that. All like little tiny bitchy moves? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck yeah, man. Well, I may be not fuck yeah. But you know, he had the money. He was doing it. That was fun. Thank you for the fact,
Starting point is 01:08:17 Toilet Hound. Oh, no. All the world's a toilet. Oh, God, she's pissing on all of the equipment. Oh my lord, that's not a toilet. No, welcome. This is a gift for me.
Starting point is 01:08:32 Did you know the Halloween script didn't call for a specific kind of mask? The mask for Michael Myers was only described as having the pale, neutral features of a man. And for the movie, the design was boiled down to two options. Both were cheap latex masks, painted white, and bought for under $2 a piece at local toy stores by production designer Tommy Lee Wallace.
Starting point is 01:08:52 One was a replica of a clown character called Weary Willie, popularized by actor Emmett Kelly, and the other was a stretched out Captain Kirk mask from Star Trek, which we all know is the one that they ended up using. And Scream had a very similar issue. It just was described as like just a scary mask. They ended up finding a mask at a toy store that would end up being the ghost face mask. But what they were trying to do is because that mask was copyrighted by some like company
Starting point is 01:09:21 called like Fun Kids Masks or something. And they tried to, like, alter it and change it to, like, get out of the copyright. And then they finally just gave up and said, fuck it, this is the ghost face mask. And they ended up getting the rights or they ended up, like, getting the company in on the deal, which must have made them so much stupid money. Of course. It's like, please give them the opportunity. I imagine that. I mean, now it is, how can you look at that mask and not think scream?
Starting point is 01:09:45 Was it a silver shamrock mask? Oh, my God. How many days of Halloween? How many days? Something days is a lot. You man would turn those kids' heads into bugs. Do you know a double amputee was used to create the thing's quintessential special effect? One of the most memorable scenes in John Carpenter's The Thing occurs when Dr. Coppa attempts to revive Norris,
Starting point is 01:10:11 as he presses the paddles to his patient's skin, Norris's chest opens up and copper's forearms disappear into the cavity where they are severed below the elbow by a set of jaws inside Norris's chest. In order to pull this off, special makeup effects designer Rob Botton found a man who had lost both of his arms below the elbow in an industrial accident. Botton fit the man with two prosthetic forearms consisting of wax bones, rubber veins, and jello. Then for the wide angle shot, he fit the man with a skin-like mask taken from a mold of Dysart's face, like Hannibal Lecter, and placed the ursats arms into the chest cavity where a set of mechanical jaws clamped down on them. As the actor pulled his arms away, the jello arms severed below the elbows, the rest of practical effects history. That's great.
Starting point is 01:11:00 Isn't that awesome? I love that part and thing. I love the thing. I don't know if that, like, that might have been one of the earliest uses of amputees in film, but it is a specialty in the stunt community. If you have an amputee, like an amputated limb, because you can be used in a scene, like, where you're getting thrashed and your body parts ripped off. It makes so much sense.
Starting point is 01:11:23 Let's cut one of your arms off, Natalie. Don't worry, you might cut. If she starts wearing her jingles shoes, we might eventually cut one of her feet off. That's actually all the time we have for the list today. There's a point in other words. I might get into more, don't worry. Oh, fucking shit.
Starting point is 01:11:43 Oh, my, why doesn't my fucking knee hurt as well as what's happening? Oh, God, everything's going dark. I think it might be going. Blind! It's items! We can't see them! Fuck yeah, here's your blind items, everybody. I hope you're ready to be terrorized by blindness.
Starting point is 01:12:03 Why? It's the scary month. I'm trying to be fun. Oh, okay. Ah! Does that work? Is that how we do it? No, be a creepy clown, Jackie. Oh, there's so many creepy clowns right now on the scene.
Starting point is 01:12:18 This B-List celebrity offspring knows that her husband would dump in a second if his ex would agree to take him back. She noticed that her husband was recently reaching out to people again to get contact info for the ex. So now the offspring is back to full on jealousy stalking mode.
Starting point is 01:12:37 And by the way, the man involved, I think it should be very important to note, is an A-list singer. Bieber and Haley Baldwin. Boom! Nailed it. Damn, bitch. That was fucking great. And who's the ex?
Starting point is 01:12:53 what's her name he was obsessed with her Selena Gomez yep that's it well when you said B-list the first thing that comes to my mind is all the bald ones all the bald wins it makes so much fucking sense it makes so much sense
Starting point is 01:13:09 damn they do I will say the pictures of them at their wedding Justin Bieber looked great oh they look so cute they do look very happy I hope that's lie it might not be true I hope that they last An insider told radar online that they're not very happy. Apparently, quote, Justin is constantly talking about Selena,
Starting point is 01:13:30 and Haley is at her boiling point with all of this. Haley absolutely lost it and reached out to Selena to stay away from her man. Whoa. Yeah. That's not a good solution to that. Just FYI. You can't blame your partner's behavior on their ex. It's not, you got to look at your partners.
Starting point is 01:13:51 You got to fucking look at. your partner and you need to start smelling his dick girl hell yeah yeah sex so you fucking preach yeah smell that dick when he gets home every time he gets home oh yeah yeah there's nothing like uh not trusting your partner to make spice up the sex life yeah always smell that dick never touch it or put it inside of you just smell it smell it remember that song I love it oh yeah yeah there was that song all about yeah let me smell you oh yes Speaking of songs, first there was the song.
Starting point is 01:14:26 Now there is going to be an interview where this foreign-born former A-plus list boybander comes out. Wait, wait, capital you. Wait, there's a song. Wait, song about what? First there was the song, and now there is going to be an interview where this foreign-born former A-plus list boy bander, now he's solo, comes out with a U. I put the with a you part in. A-you?
Starting point is 01:14:48 Justin Timberlake? Fuck, no. And you should be ashamed of yourself. Well, you know what? I can only assume that he and Jessica B. have problems, okay? No, it's not. Because I never see them anywhere, and I know that a pair,
Starting point is 01:15:02 or maybe they really really love each other. I know, that might be the opposite. He might just actually have a healthy. Like a Ryan Reynolds situation. Yeah, where they don't go to, like, party all the time. Which I hope. I do too. I do, fingers crossed.
Starting point is 01:15:12 Because if they can't make it. No, then who can do it? I don't know. So, like, a boy. Are you the ghost of fucking celebrity? relationships passed or something. Yeah. I can give a lot of clues that would give a lot of things away pretty quickly,
Starting point is 01:15:32 but this mysterious man, I'm talking like I'm talking in black. I like it, but it's not Nicholas Shea, right? No, and you should be, now you should flog yourself. I won't. Because of how bad you should feel about that. I won't. I'm going to mail you a cat of nines. And you can flog away because of your bad answer.
Starting point is 01:15:49 I like being punished. Remember what Natalie answered at first try? Then you should give yourself a gift for that. shit answer no oh just snappy cuz snappy ouch snap it's wady and zaki over here welcome back to blind items feel free to be terrified I will say that one of my favorites gave this person wrote a song about this person one of your wrote a song about this person.
Starting point is 01:16:27 Is it one of the Jonas brothers? Okay, well, it sounds like someone needs to get a tubule of gasoline. No, not gasoline. Pour it on her hair. This is like soft. I know. Throw it to the air. Who else did Taylor Swift to write music about?
Starting point is 01:16:43 Natalie. I don't know. I'm going to be the last person here to know this. Well, I know she dated a Jonas. Oh, Harry Styles. Yes, please. Oh, but I think that Harry. You come and pick me up.
Starting point is 01:16:57 There's no headlights. Dude, Harry Styles' latest music video that just came out is sex. His new video for Lights Up, it's very queer positive. There are folks of all genders grinding up on his shirtless self. The new song was released on National
Starting point is 01:17:16 Coming Out Day. And as lyrics seem to suggest, he's on the verge of doing just that, you fucking toilet hound. I am and I'm proud of it you act like you're fucking insulting me oh god she's pissing on the equipment yeah every time you say it's got to happen
Starting point is 01:17:35 absolutely amazing I would watch any tape that he's in any single tape I want all of it he is I never really was like I was not a one direction fan I'm gonna go ahead and say it not that I wasn't I'm against one direction I just never got into them
Starting point is 01:17:51 but Harry Styles now is just and the past I'm gonna say like four years. He's grown up and I really like his music. He reminds me visually of Timothy, who I really wish I didn't find so attractive because he
Starting point is 01:18:07 looks like a boy, but I don't find him very sexually attractive. It's the confidence man. It is. And also you know that it's like he is obviously old enough, so we're fine with that. But I did it. The first time I thought he was hot, I did have to Google him to make sure he wasn't a teenager.
Starting point is 01:18:23 Which made me feel a little dirty. I mean, all of Riverdale. We've all been there. I do get it, but he's got, you know, I love a Timothy, and I can't wait for, oh, lady, do we have a fucking little women date? Oh, Christ, Slug Sisters will fucking slurp their way into the AMC. Everybody make way for the Toilet Hound Slug Sisters.
Starting point is 01:18:50 Just coming. Slurps, sloop, sloop, sloop, sloop, sir, sir, give me, Timothy. Give me she with hay. All right. Can I do the last one? I'm disgusted right now. I'd ask.
Starting point is 01:19:01 Yeah, they wanted. This foreign-born permanent A-list celebrity, he used to do something else he is permanently A-list for, is married. He had a different female companion with him, however, by his side 24-7 for a recent business trip. I'm going to say he's a sportsman. I'm going to give you that clue. Don't you dare say it's fucking A-Rod? No.
Starting point is 01:19:22 He then continued his tour, and she's been there every step of the. way, even though he's a known married, he's a power couple man, former sportsmen. I don't know, I'm out. I don't know any sportsmen. Former sportsmen. Dan Marino. He's made, yes, it is. Michael Jordan.
Starting point is 01:19:42 No, it's not Dan Marino. It's not Michael Jordan. I know it's not, well, it's not A-Rod. That's another one I know because of J-Lo, but they're not married yet. His wife, who he's apparently cheating the fuck on. No. Is an ex-singer. She's an ex-singer, and he's a sportsman of what sportsman?
Starting point is 01:20:05 I don't know. I mean, I do know, but I'm not going to tell you. I don't know. Who fucking knows. I made it up. He's a made-up guy. I've made him up. So just start guessing names until you guess the made-up name I made up.
Starting point is 01:20:20 In my brain, Mark Consuelos is a sportsman, but I know he's not a sportsman, because I think I'm thinking of Jose Canseco. Daryl Strawberry. No, it's not Daryl Strawberry. No, it's not Daryl Strawberry, but I'm very happy that he got into recovery, and then he's doing a lot better now. I am looking up famous sports players right now. What I'm going to need you to do right now, Jackie,
Starting point is 01:20:42 is I'm going to need you to stand on top of a roly chair and just wiggle around a bunch. No. Until he's going to fall. Yeah, I know that's what's going to happen. That's why I'm having you do it for all these wrong answers. Don't. Natalie, you're still cool.
Starting point is 01:20:56 Aw, that's not fair. Why? It's because she doesn't know enough sports. She answered the first one first. Guess. Is it Wayne Gretzky? No, it's the fucking way of these are our elders. All right, he's young and he's not, he's not young, but he's hot.
Starting point is 01:21:09 You would want to flick your fucking bean so hard and fell off your body at this time. Floyd Mayweather? No. Andre Agassiz. No, no. Him, you'd flick your bean until it fell off your body to Andre Agassiz. Sure. Now.
Starting point is 01:21:25 I'm fine with a bald man. Also, I'm very happy you went through recovery. He was on meth, which is pretty crazy. Oh, yeah, that's a woman. All right, British, and the woman he's married to now does fashion. And I jerked off to her back of the day. Furn, all right, fashion. Oh, oh, oh.
Starting point is 01:21:44 Yeah. If Natalie gets it right now, by the way, Jackie, you're in the fucking doghouse. Beckham, Beckham, Beckham, Beckham. Beckham. Bends him. Bind it like David Beckham. You masturbate. And by the way, this is your punishment for taking so long to get a right.
Starting point is 01:22:03 You need to go get braces, and then Natalie's going to throw a soccer ball at your mouth. No, that's going to cut up my mouth. I get to be the bully this time. It's because it's not fair. I've had too many years of experience of being a bully, so that don't give me a leg up, and that's not fair. Yeah, recently he did a tour for Adidas in Seoul in Beijing, and apparently he's had some fucking side piece. No, but they're so beautiful.
Starting point is 01:22:34 Who's the side piece? I don't know. Just the rando? Just some, some rando ass fucking penis person. But also, speaking of people, when you have to Google to see how old they are, I had to do that with Brooklyn Beckham, their son. How was he?
Starting point is 01:22:50 He's 20. He's 20. He's 20. Weird. He's 20 years old. And I saw a picture of him, and I was like, who is that? I was like, good Christ. Look at this picture. I was like, yummy, mummy. I'll have a slice.
Starting point is 01:23:05 All right, you fucking bean flickers. I gotta get out of here. Before y'all slug up my day. I'm not gonna look at him until he gets a few years old. Yeah, no, he should be older, but at least he's 20, so I was fine. He's legal.
Starting point is 01:23:19 He's legal. We love you guys. Thank you guys so much for joining us today. I do have a quick thing to say real fast. For those of you questioning about Riverdale Roundup. We are going to come out with the episode next week with a one famous Molly Neville.
Starting point is 01:23:36 She's going to put that baby in a sack. She's going to put the baby on the sack around her body, and then we're going to talk about Riverdale. But last week's episode was, I cried through it because it's a memorial episode to Luke Perry. So I just, like, didn't want to make fun of it. I think it seems like it's a standalone episode, which also good for them.
Starting point is 01:23:55 It's like, I mean, it's still Riverdale ridiculous and we will touch upon Stitt, but I didn't want to make fun of it because I thought that I was just, it was very sad and upsetting episode. So we will be back with Riverdale Roundup next week. I'll do it with Molly Napol. Slap that baby on your belly.
Starting point is 01:24:13 My name is Jackie Zabrowski. You follow me on Instagram. I just shut off for a second. You follow me on Instagram, but Jack that worm. I'm Holda McNeely. You can find me on World Star. I'm Big Holdy Holds. and you can find me on Twitch.
Starting point is 01:24:28 I'm Holdenators Ho. Twitch.com. Twitch.com slash Holdenators ho. You can find me on Bean Flickers at Sorry Not Sorry. And you can find us on Patreon weekly bonus content. Yes. Weekly bonus content. Mostly about the TV we're watching.
Starting point is 01:24:44 And it's a lot of fun. So check it out. It's just $5 a month. We're going to have them pop histories coming at you soon again too. And which also makes me excited to continue to have Natalie in our lives, even though we get Molly back as well, which would be very nice. Yeah, I'm so happy that Marley's coming back.
Starting point is 01:25:01 Yeah. I'm so happy. I'm not leaving. No, you're not going to be leaving, because we're going to do pop history together, and it's going to be great. Yeah. We love you guys so much.
Starting point is 01:25:11 Thank you so much for joining us this week, and we'll talk to you next week. Bye. Bye. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors. You can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the show,
Starting point is 01:25:28 one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.

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