Page 7 - Episode 339: Juice Goose

Episode Date: February 6, 2020

We goss about Stormi World, the Superbowl, and we throw down a hatchi matchi on Shakira and J. Lo's halftime show.    Listen to Page 7 free on Spotify!   Need even more hot goss? Support us on our Patreon page and get weekly bonus Patreon-exclusive content!   Local Forecast - Elevator, Acid Jazz, Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0 Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Hey guys, it's Jackie Zabrowski here. You can call me Jackalicious in the streets, but you could also call me Monsignor, Jacqueline in the Sheets. I'm here to tell you guys about her move to Spotify. So this show, along with all your other LPN favorites, is going exclusive to Spotify on Valentine's Day 2020. It's a day of heart. It's a day for crying.

It's a day for getting really drunk on Spotify shows. That means you'll only be able to listen to this episode, future episodes, and our entire back catalog of shows over on Spotify, starting on February 14th. But Spotify accounts are free and easy to create. So you can just download the app, or you can listen to it on your computer. You can listen to all of our shows on Spotify right now. And you can download episodes for offline listening with your free account. The Last Podcast Network and all of your favorite music in one place? Could I grab my Bress any harder?

Man, I might be grabbing them too hard right now. Listen to the last podcast network. Free on Spotify. This isn't my fault just because I'm starting to get obsessed with Harry Styles. Just stop you crying. It's a sign of the times. We got to get away from here. We got to get away from here.

Just stop you crying. It'll be. be all right. They told me that the end is near. We got to get away from here. And you know what? There's a lot of things going on in this world right now that we got to get away from mentally, emotionally, physically, and I'm obsessed with Harry Stiles.

List them off. I'm obsessed with Harry Styles. I think that this is, I'm old. This is an old song. This is years old. Jackie, how old are you? You know what? I'm 33.

I'm 32. I'm 32. I'm sorry. I was going to say. She's so bright. I'm 33. Jesus is age. I'm 32.

We are so old that young, young direction, one direction. So young. Yeah. Young direction. Young direction is no longer, not only are they no longer like a boy band. No, they're not cool. Yeah. They're like in their mid to late 20s.

They're a man band. They're like almost orange now. Yeah. Well, now, and to the fact that they've moved on to other things, and I was trying to get into one direction, and I really dug one direction, and now I'm just, I am just balls deep in Harry Styles' solo work, and I'm obsessed.

I'm absolutely obsessed. I've heard good things, and how do you like Zane? I, I, you know what of their name. I like Zane. I actually enjoy Zane. I like, because I was like, oh, yeah, Harry Potter's. Harry Potter. Oh my God, we're so old.

Harry, what other things the kids like, Pokemon, right? Is Pokemon still Fitch? Actually, people are enjoying Pokemon again right now. He came out of this week, so too long ago. I'm on the Zane train. Yeah, everyone's like, no, Zane is better. He's, like, more musically talented.

He's Potter. That's what everybody says about Zane. Yeah, absolutely. I'm on the Zane train. Oh, yeah. I mean, but then to the, I think that the 90s, but then there's like 90s nostalgia is back right now. Did you guys see this?

It's another one. these candles. Man, candles are taking everything by force. Is a candle about the 90s? It's 90s nostalgia candles. Oh, please. Does it smell like, does it smell like Sabaro?

Yeah, what is it? Yeah. That's what 90s nostalgia is the mall, like, food courts. Does it smell like not fitting in? That's what the 90s were for most people. It was like, I don't know. Was it smell like trying cigarettes for the first time? Yeah, it's a bunch of coughing.

No, it's like one is called glass pop. It smells like lip smackers. Another one's dream light that smells like Gap Dream Body Miss, which actually very into, and I would probably want to smell it. Yeah, that would probably bring back some memories because you know how smell of like the strongest memories? Right.

That's what I was saying. Oh, yeah. I think back on that time, I think of a rainy day and like blue jeans that are kind of wet and Nirvana. Well, then I guess you have to get Blune Gene Baby because Blue Gene Baby smells like a pair of freshly laundered vintage Calvin's still warm from the dryer. This one is a combination of washed denim, white musk, and mimosa florals. See, mine would smell like they would slightly damp blue jeans that are like

covered it. Why are they damp? Because it's so rainy all the time because it's the 90s. And then, and they're kind of wafted in cigarette smoke, right? That you snuck out the back of your friend's house and went into the woods and smoked. So you were, you would have been in high school in the late 90s, right? Yeah, yeah. And you were smoking Sigs by then? Oh, I was smoking cigarettes to start. I mean, and by the way,

hardest thing, it was like awful to quit. Every, no, in no way should anybody do this. Because I was peer pressured, yo, okay? But I smoked my first cigarette in like seventh grade. You have morals of steel. What are you talking about? I smoked my first cigarette in seventh grade. I smoked my first, hit a weed in like 10th grade.

Whoa. And got my first big. big time drunk in 10th grade too. We all got really drunk. Now I remember we were drinking like Ice House and my buddies decided to slide around in the yard and there were sprinkler heads in the yard they didn't know about it.

So they cut themselves up. My friend pissed and shed him threw up on himself. She probably would have died that night. I was glad he didn't die. Jordan's shoutouts. And I remember I took my first hit of weed out of an empty bullet shell in a hot tub that night. All in the same night.

Wow. And I didn't, again, I know I've said this in the show before, but didn't make out with the girl till college. And that's fascinating. All the rough times of it and none of the fun, sexy times of it. Just a bunch of 16-year-olds boys just horny as hell getting shotgunning weed through a beer can sliding around, cutting themselves on the lawn. It was like an older sister situation. She hooked us up and the mom was out of town. The mom was checked out or whatever.

She was out of town. Big house, hot tub. It's a cool deal. This is the thing about I didn't drink in high school, but in retrospect, I'm like, I probably would have a great time. You're at people's like, it depends on whose houses you're at, but like some of my friends had nice houses.

We could have been sitting and watching movies on a big screen. No, you think that's what you're going to do. You puke into somebody's pool and then you have to figure out how to get the throat and when you're drunk and you're way too drunk on vodka out of a plastic bottle and then you try to have to try and skim the puke out of the pool because you're worried about it going into the pool filter. That is exactly what it is. You're so bad at drinking in high school that you do the, like you thought you would have done dumb shit in college.

And it's a pretty dumb shit in college. You are like so much worse at drinking. You're going to make that bad phone call to a girl. You're going to fucking throw up off the side of your buddy's balcony while your other friend is pissing and shit in themselves or whatever. It is unbelievable. My piece de resistance was always, that's not the right word use for this phrase. I like to, when I would like a person, I would write them notes and then we would drunk drive to their house to put the note in their mailbox. Wow.

Which that is, because again, see, that's where you die. Like I still, whenever I think about these things, I'm like, man, I don't, like, I am very thankful and grateful that I do. didn't die and then I didn't accidentally like sleepers somebody. Remember sleepers? That's what I was always scared of, like, accidentally throwing a hot dog cart down a set of stairs and killing a person and then having to go to a prison as a young child and having to deal with everything that Kevin Bacon puts you through.

Right. Yeah, I feel like, shout out to sleepers. The fact that 16 year olds can drive, I didn't drink when I was 16, but I did drive. And that is something where I'm like, uh, absolutely. I was way too dumb in my reasoning ability to drive at that age. The fact that 16-year-olds can drive at all is wild. But the fact that everyone else I know got drunk by the time they were 16, everyone but me got drunk by the time they were 16 at least.

And often way earlier and then got keys and are like, all right, go do your thing. It's like absolutely terrifying. Well, you just think about the dumb shit you did to impress your friends or impress somebody you were into. Yeah. And then you think about like now you're behind this like death machine and you still have that urge to be like, look how fast I can spin the wheel left and right. And you have no sense that you can, that something bad can happen to you. Do you ever go mudden? Yes.

And it's like that kind of thing. So not only do you take, so you drink beers and then you get behind the wheel of a car and just try and destroy it and just try and destroy wherever you are and make as much. and try to get stuck, try to like spin it out of control and shit where it's like we're not infest in the theories. That's a redneck. Why did we do that? That's because you and I grew up in the south, though. That's a southern idiot thing for sure.

Not that southern people are stupid, but, you know, it's specifically... It's an idiot thing to do, yes, no matter what you are. Everyone in my hometown would do, like, donuts and, like, if it's snowed, you know, you, like, go out and see how many times you can spin your car and shit. Oh, yeah. Stuff that's just, like, again, it's just like, somebody should a high room lodged that, shit as like the mayor should have just been like I decreed no children with cars anymore I told this story before this is the most thing I think back on I'm like oh my god I can't believe we

did this we would go get a bunch of eggs this is like right before we could party or anything we go get a assload of eggs from the store I hate this story there's a there was a sunroof in my buddy's car and we would have the sunroof open and we would try to hit cars going the opposite direction of us on their windshield in order to provoke a high-speed chase through a residential neighborhood, which would happen multiple times because we were so bored and so frustrated and so angry and whatever. And I think back, and it's not like we did it a lot, but we did it a couple times. And it was, I will say it was pretty thrilling.

But like, we really were fucking with death. I don't regret a minute of it had a great time. I'm facing death in the eye. No, he's guilty. He feels guilty about it. I feel terrible. And also these other people, not only are we risking their lives, but like just, or they're just having the worst day ever and then an egg hits their windshield during, while they're in a 35 mile per hour, like street, try to get home at night. It's probably alarming. I've been egged in, like my body has been eggs twice and it's scary as hell. It's horrifying. It's a real projectile. It's worse than

paintball. And it's, like, on top of this, and maybe this is a too serious thing to say, but like, do somebody that their parents had put, they worked for some sort of government official thing, and they'd put this thing on their car because they had been arrested for underage drinking, that the car couldn't start unless you blew, like you blew under the legal limit. And I was like, shouldn't everybody have that?

Yeah, everybody should have that. The car does not start unless you are below the legal limit. Yeah, you don't have a right to drive a car if you're tanked. Yeah, that should totally be. This is how you get around that. You take your like, four-year-old daughter with you to the car. Oh, that's hot. Oh, and then you have to look her in the eye. Yeah, but you have to do, you can only, you're only allowed to do that if you have to look her in the eye while you do it.

I'm just saying, that's what would happen probably, and it would just become more dangerous because this is America. Because then you let the four-year-old drive. See, this is what we got to do. This is with the kids and make them drive. Is this a good or a bad time to say that I'm drinking a mangoita? Is this a good? We are drinking, but we're not driving anywhere. We're not driving anywhere. Uber baby in New York City subway's son. A friend of mine after I had kids messaged me and he was like everybody will tell you that raising kids in New York City

is terrible but he has like a teenager, a high schooler and he was like, but let me tell you the secret about having a young like adolescent in New York City from the ages of 11 to 16 if you live in a city with public transit those kids have mobility and they can go anywhere.

And they can go out and fuck around and do you know stuff that 11 to 16 year olds do that they're going to be older and be like, oh, I can't believe I did that. Yeah. But they are not going to be, I mean, if you're in the suburbs or, you know, in a place without any public transit, you're not behind a wheel when you're 16, but you might be behind the wheel of some idiot 16-year-old, you know, in the passenger seat or whatever.

But you just don't have any mobility. So from the ages of 11 to 16, you're angsty as hell and you're stuck in basements. You're reliance on either, you know, parents or other kids to drive you around. there's probably not awesome like bike paths or whatever to like bike safely and like Where are the damned? Where are the damned bike paths America?

There should be more bike pads. But like But that's the reason why you're going to go burn down a factory building because there's no bike pads for you to use. I'm just saying a 12 year old should be able to ride a bike to their friend's house

but my friend was like so 11 to 16 year olds in New York City. It's not that they don't get angsty and depressed, but at least they can have independence that 11 to 16 year olds and the rest of the country can't access because of the transit like problem, which I thought was so interesting. Yeah, I get that. I also think about like, I'm sure they can find a bar somewhere that will serve them or like, you know what I mean? Like, because it's fucking New York. Like, I feel like you can just find trouble so much more easily. There's so much more access to trouble as well. There's no, there's no more trouble. There's no more

trouble than a teen and a car and alcohol. Yeah, it's true. Like, there is no amount of, I hang out with my friends from New York who grew up here and they're like, oh, we got so drunk and we went all the way from the Bronx to Coney Island and then we didn't know how to get back to the Bronx. And I'm like, that's fine. That's fine. Oh, you had a long train ride and had you file sleep on the train?

Like, I hope that the teenagers I know are doing that and not in a car, you know? That's true. And imagine all of the atrocities that Stormy Webster someday will probably do. behind some sort of very, I was about to say, I don't even know what's an expensive car name, a spider? Bougatty, Bugatti, Bugatti, Bugatti, Bugatti, Bugadi, begin me.

Soarmy Webster, who is Kylie Jenner's daughter, is, I get you, please, you gotta look up the pictures. How did I end up with the hot tip? I got the lead story this week. Yay. Amazing. You are allowed this one time, you were allowed to have the lead story.

Yeah, Jackie, I was surprised that this was not included in your, initial email blast. It is... I honestly usually don't talk about the Kardashian-Gener family too often. I think you guys have noticed that on this show. Because otherwise the whole show

would just be a Kardashian-Generate show. Because they have so much all the time. But this is something else. It was Stormy. Who is, she's such a cute little girl. She is so cute. I know what I will say about the Kardashians and the Jenners.

They seem to very much be present and adore their children. And I will give them that. And she threw, this is the kind of thing that when I look at the kind of stuff that they do and I'm just like, God, I would never do that guy. Why are you wasting your money? All these people need so many things in this world.

But if there's one thing, I would love to be able to give my kids some days, like dumb fucking birthday parties. No matter how little money we had growing up, my mom always, she would make stuff and do that kind of stuff, make as great memorable birthdays for us. And I always appreciated that. But this is another world.

Apparently it's a Frozen 2-themed second birthday party, but instead what they did is she created Stormy World. And all of the, I just, it's, they have so many big, huge exaggerations of her head. Absolutely. She's such a cute kid. Blown up version of her head, and you walk into her mouth,

and then on top of the cake is this big cartoon head version, and it looks like she's throwing up rainbows everywhere. It does. She is very cute, and none of the multiple artistic renderings of her face sculpted for this party really are anything less than absolutely terrifying. Terrify. If I was that age, I would look and run screaming and not want to be around it. This is the thing. In terms of memorable birthday parties for kids, totally, and like go all out.

But a two-year-old is already, if you've ever been to any two-year-old's birthday party, all they're doing is crying because they're so overwhelmed. And they cry when you sing happy birthday to them. And they're like, because they're like just starting to understand like, I'm a person in the world. Why is everyone looking at me? You know, like, and it's really overwhelming. And also she's not going to remember, but this is, they're just like setting money on fire.

And she was probably like really stressed out. I don't mean to speculate about Stormy's feelings. But it is a lot of stimulation for two-year-olds. It was a lot of stimulation for me looking at these pictures. Yeah, right? I was getting stressed out just looking at it. I saw your eyes. I saw fear and I saw a lot of emotion going on.

There's too much happening. There's even, there's an indoor roller coaster type thing. Like, there's, there's, there's merchandise. And all of, and the tagline of the party was two is better than one. And I'm assuming that has to do with Frozen 2 the sequel. But I was like, wait a second. I was like, she's not a twin. So I don't really understand why the tagline is two is better than one.

The number, because she's two years old. Two years old is better. the one-year-old. Oh, Jackie, you need to go to... Well, that's age-shaming. Okay? What? At one, they're learning a lot.

I think you made a gaffe just now and you're embarrassed about it and you're immediately trying to spin it into some kind of a political thing as a defense mechanism. You can change perspective on anything. No, that's age-shamist and I'm upset. But I think the original issue is that you just had no idea that this really obvious thing was this really obvious thing. No, no, no. No, no, I'm upset.

You know what? You learn a lot at the age of one. Right. And how dare you say that what you learn at the age of two is better than what you learn at the age of one? What would you say, Molly, do you think what age is better? Two or one? My oldest is not yet two, but not yet, but still, not still a one. That is not, no longer one.

It's the Britney Spears crossroads of ages. It's true because young one is very different than older one. Young one, my favorite bubble rapper, by the way. He's one years old, and they're trying to keep him that way with some kind of science experiment, but it's not working. He keeps growing. But, man, his raps are so good. Just like, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go,

I learn a lot at this age. That's what he also does. Wow. You know what, Jaggie, I think your age is. Because I think that the age two is easily better than age one. You have more mental faculties. You're learning how to shit or walk. Are we talking about for the person themselves from your own subjectivity,

what is better or like for everyone involved for the child for you know I mean I'm excited for for my kid to turn two I think it's I think the big difference is language like when you turn one you're still a baby and then you very quickly become a toddler and then when what I can anticipate by the time you're two you actually have like some memory you have some language you have like don't they refer to it as the terrible twos they do but there's some I've heard a lot of people say that that's actually describing the year from one the second year of your life which is the You're from one to two. And a lot of parents say that from two to three is really fun.

And then this is a real, forgive me for going into like parents. Yeah, I'm saying right now, fuck four year olds, bro. People, a lot of, I don't have any three-year-olds in my home, but people are very stressed out by three-year-olds. And the Lord help me, the fray, if you read a lot of parenting things online, the phrase, the word three-nager is a very popular word. I kind of like, though. Pre-nager, because they're so opinionated.

They're so opinionated. Moody. I'll give them, though. I definitely was a nanny of a for-nado, though, is what now I'm going to start referring to her ass, because she was definitely a for-nado. And she would yell that I was fat all the time, and I didn't, I was like, I know this. You don't have to tell me. I'm aware of the fact that I'm fat.

Thank you very much. And I'm a big fan of five alive because I was, I know when they turn into robots and they did that all. Like, I'm alive. You're alive. Oh, yeah. I'm always thinking about short circuit. Every day I'm thinking about short circuit.

Oh, pop culture, huh? Pop culture. I mean, please look up Stormy World. Storm World's very upsetting. I mean, it looked like all the adults had a really good time, so I will say it seems like it was the party was a hit. You know, I think it's just the weird, like, why does everything involve Stormy and, like, her mouth agape?

There's something about anybody who's just got like a, like, oh, like just like, it looks like she's, like, choking on that rainbow. I think it's like the Instagram filter. I'm going to go ahead and guess, maybe the baby is obsessed with that Instagram filter when you open your mouth when the rainbows come out. Oh, okay, because I was trying to figure out, I'm like, why is it, it just seems, I don't know what that is, but it's like just disturbing for some reason. I don't know why. There's also a photo of her meeting like a real-life troll and just picturing my own child if that happened, but she would be absolutely freaking out. out. Not in an excited way.

From the troll movies, we should say. Not like an actual. Not a troll that exists on earth. From Norway. Yeah. No, that was a whole big thing. I think he put his Georgian. He threw a stone at the child.

I think it might be a little scary. I saw Frozen for the first time this weekend. Really? I feel a little bit like I finally. I thought it was fun. I enjoyed it. I haven't seen the sequel. It does feel weird.

I guess you have kids, so it makes more sense. It does feel weird for me to be like, Lexi, would you like to watch a Disney film with me? Like the newest. That's why I like Disney Plus because it gives me, like since I pay the $6 a month, I'm like, we should, like yesterday we watch Reket Ralph because I've never seen it. And I was like, well, I pay for this. We should use it. I love children's movies and I'm trying to continue to enjoy that love before the inevitable

when if I do have a child with Lexi that I know that I will begin to hate them, to revile them at some point. At least by all accounts. Have the girls found anything yet? Because, like, my niece was obsessed with Finding Nemo. So I've seen Finding Nemo a hundred thousand times, but it was a great movie, so I was cool with it. But still. We watched Sesame Street every morning, which Freddie absolutely loves.

But this was her first movie. She was, like, sick and we just, like, wanted to, like, be calm. And so this was, like, her first thing besides Sesame Street, basically. Oh, okay. And I think she was into it, but also you're pretty, even the whole, like, the whole, like, thinking is about Stormy. Like she's too, like,

not the two-year-olds can't be really into movies, but I don't think that, like, hour and a half is to, like, a pretty long, like, time.

Like, I don't think that a two-year-old can, like, really understand a movie. They get characters. Like, Freddie loves Elmo and loves Grover and loves Cookie Monster.

But, yeah, like, to actually be like, yes, my favorite movies are Frozen 2 and trolls. Right. Maybe that's true for two-year-olds, but I think that you're just getting into that. Like, my nephews who are three and four,

they're like, Paw Patrol, They have all sorts of characters that they love. But I feel like that's something about two. You're just getting into that. Molly, I hate to, like, maybe upset you about your own child, but Stormy is an indigo child. And they operate on a different wildlife than maybe your normal child.

It's an indigo child. You haven't heard that phrase before? That's apparently what, like, Billy Elish is and stuff, too. It's like these very rich people have these very special children, and they call them indigo children. It's like when you want, it's essentially that whatever complex is when you need your child to be like on another level than everyone else's or something.

Like the movie Parasite, which also please watch Parasite. It's exactly. It's that exact thing. It's that exact fucking thing, actually. I want to be Indigo. What if I'm Scarlet. And then, but without the letter. I'm Scarlet without the letter. I can't believe I, you guys have never heard of that phrase before.

I'm sure I have and I think I just, I think it absorbs into my brain somewhere where I'm like, well, that's fucking dumb. Am I allowed to say that? You know what it goes into the special part of my lizard brain where I just file it away for who gives a fuck. Okay, here you go. According to a pseudoscient, this is from Wikipedia, according to a pseudo-scientific new age concept,

Indigo children are children who are believed to possess special, unusual, and sometimes supernatural traits or abilities. The idea is based on concepts developed in the 1970s by Nancy Ann Tape, and further developed by Lee Carroll and Jan Tober. So these are these special, and they have a test you can take? I'm not saying that Indigo children. probably exist for sure, but I don't think that stormy is one of them. I will throw it out there.

14 signs you're an indigo child. I was going to say, who gets to declare an indigo child? Number one, and maybe, well, let me give the test for your child. So maybe pick your favorite one and we'll give the test for them. Number one, you were strong-willed. Yes. Number two, you are an old soul. Oh my God, I'm definitely an old soul.

I'm an indigo child. Hey, what's up, everyone? How you doing Ben Kisle here with? Katie Dirks. Let you know about Kind of Fun. It's the LPN Wrestling podcast, and Dare I say, it's Kind of Fun, bringing you all the news you need to know about wrestling to keep you up to date. Yeah, we cover all sorts of news from across the wrestling industry, keep you updated, all the hot goss, all the fun stuff. Everything you need to know.

So check out Kind of Fun on the LPN Network. It's Kind of Fun. Now, I was just thinking about this recently. One of our friends has a kid who, like, really did. From the time she was three, she, like, already just seemed like, like, like, great. kind of grown up and like some kids really do seem that way. Usually a kid who's like, I'm an old soul, has just been told that a lot by adults. Well, I think a lot of this Indigo Child Shop and stuff they've been told since they were young age.

But I was just thinking I was like, my kid, she just was like a kid. She doesn't seem particularly old for her age, which is great. Does she seem like a freethinker? Yeah. I mean, all toddlers are free thinkers. Does she seem like a passionate truth seeker? Oh my God. Yes.

She like, like a child. She is interested in learning and knowing. Does she well, how about this fucking shit then? For what I think is your normal ass kid. Does she want to change the world? I, she wants to control her world. Is she a change making leader? Not yet.

Does she have a, she will be though? Does she have a loner autonomous personality? I can't, she is a one-year-old. She's very autonomous. You ever try to tell a one-year-old what to do? Does she have a strong connection with nature and animals? Definitely not. Well, animals, yes, cats, but she's a New York City kid.

We don't have nature. Does she look like this girl in this picture right here? Describe the girl. Can you describe the girl, mom? Her hair is long, flowing hair. She has some radiation beams going between her and the moon. Is she from Chernobyl? Everything is blue.

She's very serious. My child is never that serious. There's kind of stars swirling around her. Yeah, no, that's, I don't think my kids are an indigo kid. So I don't think your kids is an indigo child. She's definitely not blue, right? She's not blue. And I don't think she's an indigo child.

No, she's just, yeah. Maybe she'll grow into it, though. Maybe. Yeah, maybe she'll grow into Fissioning. She's free-thinking autonomous one-year-old, though. I love that even Wikipedia says it's pseudoscience. Like, just not even try. So do we know who other famous people identify as one besides Billy Eilish?

This is like a future list, I feel like. People, indigo These famous people think their children are indigo children I mean I imagine that Goop probably thinks that Apple is an indigo child Right to some extent Totally Probably every rich person is like yes Because every rich person thinks their child is more special than all the other children

I mean every person's child is special in their own right Like that's the thing It's like don't if you push it That's when they stop being so special Because then they become an egotistical asshole And there's a fine line between the two Yeah, all children are special are special and deserve to be loved and celebrated

for their special things about them but the idea that every, it's coincidentally, it's just the rich people who actually give birth to the really good kids, you know? Right, right, exactly. All these other schmucks out here have their non-indigo vibes. Yeah, they don't have specific, there's like one

list, but it was like the first one was Kurt Cobain and I was like, well, I guess you can in hindsight call someone an indigo child. I have a very big feeling that I'm about to go into quite the worm time about this. There is so many aspects of their indigo categories like the humanist, conceptual indigos,

artist indigos, interdimensional indigos, or catalyst indigos? I'm, oh, no, guys, why did you do this to me? Uh-oh. Why did you do this? Now I'm about to go into this. This article says indigo crystal and star seed children. Oh, my characteristics revealed.

Oh, God. There was a star seed. And then also, related to the Indigo's are the Blu-ray children, not the disc. They have a different temperament and a blue aura with traces of violet. What? They have telekinetic powers.

See, that's the main thing. What do they need with telekinetic powers? Okay, so crystal children are the offspring of indigos, and they began to incarnate in greater numbers at the turn of the century. They commonly have a penetrating gaze. Does your child... Because you might have been indigo, Molly.

It might have been an indigo child. Yeah, I mean, she can definitely get your attention with her eyes for sure. They sometimes possess unusual, colored, and often round eyes. They're sensitive, both mentally and physically, and suffer from allergies and sensitivities caused by environmental factors. So as your child sort of weak and just bad at living? Thank goodness. None of the, no allergies or anything so far.

Did you see, Jackie, I sent you a video of, oh, my God. taught Freddy to, Gideon has taught Freddy to do her hair toss, check, check my nails. And then if you say, Baby how you feel it? Oh my God.

Freddie, how you feel it? She goes, ah, ha, ha, it's so, I, you said this to me yesterday

and I burst into tears because I'm having, it's the, it's my time, it's, you know, every fluctuating week of whether I want to have children right now

or whether I'm absolutely terrified, and I'm on a plus week and I was like, oh my God. It's perfect. She's absolutely perfect. You know what? She is perfect,

which means she is an indigo child. I love, apparently Nancy Ann Tapp is the one that created the movement, and this is the problem with indigo children is that many of their traits could easily be applied to all children. In general, the entire indigo movement plays off the fact that parents with woolly thinking and rambunctious children would prefer to believe their kids are special space angels,

rather than brats or children with learning disabilities. I was just reading a thing that's like, it seems to be purporting that, like, most kids who think their children's into go actually just have severe ADHD. And that's fine. See, the thing is that we, like, growing up, like, I'm saying all these things, like,

in Jess, but it's like, growing up, like, I've done the past lives tests. I've done my numerology charts. I've done my birth charts. Like, my mom is very into that. I find it very interesting to learn about all of these things just to know. I don't know if I necessarily believe in past lives,

but it is interesting that apparently I am an old soul. And then in times I have been my own mother's mother in past lives. And that is an interesting thing to find out about. But what I love about your mom, unlike these celebrities, she did the opposite of making you feel like you were special and better than everyone else. Yeah, no, no, no. It was just keep working. No, that's great.

No, no, fine. Yeah, no, you're doing it? Okay, keep working. Keep working. You're not working hard enough. And to this day, she's not working hard enough. But you know who is working hard enough? Jaquira, Jaquira.

And I have been calling myself Jaquira since watching the Super Bowl, and I've been moving my butt, and I'm working on moving my butt, because Shakira, Shakira. I did not really realize until that halftime show that I love every Shakira song. Came for J-Lo, lap for Shakira. Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I mean, I, like, this was the experience.

When I was watching the J-Lo part, which of course was second, I was like, yeah, this is great. I like watching J-Lo dance. But during the Shakira part, I was like, I love every Shakira song. All these songs are so good. And I just didn't, that feeling didn't exactly, like, J-Lo songs are good, of course. And I have steps, man. Yeah, she did great. It was blowing me away that, like, fast-foot, it was so good.

Yeah, her dancing, both of their dancing were fantastic, but her, but Shikira, I think, absolutely took it. And also, I just, I guess, like I said, I just didn't realize, damn, damn, I love. love for music. It's so fucking good. And it's also such a, it's like, it was giving me really positive early 2000s vibes. I was like, yeah, this is like, this person has made, like, decades of really awesome music. And so has Jailo. But I'm in a Shakira sound right now. But which one do you choose? Your Shakira? Absolutely. I'm all Shakira, baby. And you know how I feel. And I love Jailo. This doesn't mean I don't love Jailo. But when they, I mean, even just watching, and I kept having to pause it and go back and watch when they were next to each other, shaking.

in their butts. And I know both the butts are perfect and amazing, but Shakira's butt. You just had to keep pausing and just going rewatching. Watch it again. This time I'll watch Shakira. This time I'll watch Jayla. It's research.

So Shakira kind of, you know, we talked about this weeks ago in the blind items, and then it started kind of seeping out into the non-so blind items that they were having a lot of difficulties because J-Lo was supposed to have originally the halftime show. alone and they added on Shakira because it would be the first time that two Latina performers

would perform for the half bowl, the Super Bowl half time. And so Shakira was kind of opening, quote unquote, for J-Lo, but when she came back and she showed up on the drums, are you kidding? I just, and still to this day, I think that all, I mean, I mean, musicians, of course, I think most people have weak spots sexually for musicians, but a woman on the drums, yeah, Makes me melt. Yeah, agree. And I was like, wait, she's back and that's Shakira on the drums. It was such a great, like, yeah, it was such a great way for her to reappear.

And I don't know. I guess, obviously, we're framing it like it was a contest, but I don't know why J-Lo is so mad that Shakira was there because I think it made the whole show better. You know, that is, again, that was like a blind item. Who knows, that could just be the fucking whole system trying to yet again make us pit two women against each other. and that fits the narrative of every single time to women on stage. It seemed, they seemed, you know, I was, and I was hawk-eye in for tension because of the blind item knowledge. Yeah. I mean, I don't know.

It seemed like love on that stage. It did. I don't feel like that, you know what I mean? Yeah. So, I mean, yeah, it's like a juicy, fun blind item, whatever, because of course, right? And I think if J-Lo really was frustrated, I think she has a point. Yeah. If she thought that she was headlining the Super Bowl.

And then they're like, psych. It's like this other thing now where you're split. I would have been probably frustrated too. You know what I mean? But it does seem like they were having fun up there together. And that's what it seems like. It seems like she was frustrated but got over it. I think it's just that may have happened.

And I would again also be frustrated up top about it. Jackie, you would have been, oh, we're just up top. Not the entire time. Jackie, because she cares fucking amazing. And that they fucking killed that show together. Jackie, I'm going to go ahead and say that you would have been a very mean monster person. What are you trying to say? Oh yeah, because I'm that mean about it.

Jackie, Jackie, I'd like you to be the only host of the Page 7 festival coming up. I love that because I work alone. Molly, would you also like to now instead? I want to retcon things a little bit, Jackie. I'm sorry, but Molly, would you like to co-host the Page 7 Festival? I'll co-host, and I insist. I never co-anything. Well, part of the rumors was that J-Lo insisted that Shakira

goes first, right? And that she... Okay, I could see that. But, I don't know. And then she brought out that pole, man. She brought out the poll, I think... Oh, man. I hate to keep talking about it like I was a contest.

I just personally enjoyed Shakira more. But I think that J-Lo is incredible, and I would watch her dance. She rocked it. And I love that poll stuff. I can't believe people are upset about it or whatever. Everybody needs to relax. Everybody who is scandalized by that needs to just, like, relax and like watch some more Latin dance, not less.

Yeah, and chill out. What were they so scared? Honestly, in watching it again, I was like, okay, and they're like, but children watch a show. It's a pole. It's a pole. It's a pole. What does it matter? She's dancing.

It's a different kind of dancing. I think it was the pole and then they were shaking butts. And you know what? I think it was more like a fireman's pole. So I think that they're actually misinterpreting maybe a little bit of a nod to our service individuals in this country. That and the fact that so many people were upset about like, this isn't even about female empowerment. How dare she, they wear the tiny clothes and she dances on the

stripper pole. People need to catch up, man. What do you mean? What are you upset about because strippers have a lot of skills in a certain area that you don't and you don't like that they get paid money for it? Like, that's not female empowerment. For a woman to own her body and to get up on a stage

and to dance for other people and to make a lot of money doing it, that's not female empowerment? That's some old school shit to be scandalized by a stripper pole. Like, catch up. Especially when we were talking about this before, I'm like, come on, I feel like half of those same people complaining did at least one, like, exercise poll class to try it out with, you know, friends or what, you know what I mean? It's so normalized now.

There's like, it's ridiculous. It's everywhere now. The poll classes for like different reasons or whatever. Also, have you ever taken one before? I've only taken one and I was like, I can't do this. It's hard to do it. I would be like when the presidential fitness test at elementary school, you just have to hang from the pull up. That would be me, but with the pole, I would just be like, I don't.

God, that would be funny to see Molly doing one of these classes. I actually did very well with pull-ups when I was little because I was very, very small-framed. And I could do it. But now, if I have to do it. Honestly, it's all about that leg strength, though. And just the burns alone, I feel like, that I would suffer from sliding up and down that pole. It's just, it's, this whole Super Bowl was really about, it was so, I mean, I mean, we'll, get to Demi Lovato, but I think that the show itself was so pro, like, it's just pro people

and pro women, and I felt, it's like, I mean, a lot fucking better than Maroon Five. Yeah, that's the thing. I love the comparison photos of, like, all the same people who were lauding his shirtless self on stage. Oh, yeah, I forgot. It was Adam Levine. Remember that? Everyone was, like, so sexy.

And that was, no one complained about him, this man, like, fully shirtless gallivanting around the stage, but just like, and then you see J-Lo, fuck. fucking rip it on a pole, like not even just like lazily doing shit. Effortless. Fucking crushing it on doing something that most everyone in that stadium could not do. Yeah. Fuck off with that noise, man. And on top of it, how do we feel?

You know I don't like it when children sing. But I like the, I really, really love the relationship of Jalo and her daughter and bringing her daughter on stage and singing with the kids choir, the back, I'm just like, because they were also making a much bigger statement. about what's going on in our country right now. And the Puerto Rican flag was cool too. Like, you know, it was not a super explicit, like, I feel like I've seen people be like they should have done more given the crisis

Puerto Rico is in, but I've also seen people be like, yeah, right, exactly. Like, I've also seen people like, the Puerto Rican flag, but this is America. And so I feel like, it was great to be like, yeah, Puerto Rican flag. Oh, the pearl clutching that happens. Oh, the pearl clutching. But yeah, I'm with you, Jack. At first I was like, who's this kid? And then when I realized it was her kid, I was like, oh, that's nice.

They actually been doing a lot of tour shows together, too, where she brings her up on stage and they sing together. And just that bond where, I mean, it is the opposite of when, you know, my mother used to force me to do those kinds of things in front of people when I didn't want to, which is why I was terrified of singing in front of other people for most of my life. Let's talk more about your mother. Can we unpack? Have I just been unpacking too much? I've been journaling a lot lately. Oh, my God. I just had a lot to say.

So maybe that's where all of this is. coming from. I'm completely, but I just want to take this time to say, I am thrilled with my relationship with my mother. And if you're listening right now, you did nothing wrong.

And I just want you to say, appreciate you. Honestly, I love my mother. Oh, yeah, right. All the things you've been saying for the past 40 minutes. I love my mother, what are you talking about? You called her a basket of beans.

Just 15 minutes ago. Well, I love beans. I'm a legume head. Everybody calls me that. I forgot your name was Lil Gumi back in. Little Gumi. Yeah, you were hanging out with a young one or whatever. My like parent of young children, adult brain, saw that, and I was like, if I, right now,

I know this won't be the case forever when my kids are older, but right now I'm, like, so in it with, like, very young kids. I was like, if I had to go on stage and perform and my kid was on stage with me, my brain would short circuit and I would only be, like, thinking about the kid. And I couldn't. It's like, right now I have to, like, compartmentalize that, like, thinking about the kid thinking about something else. And then if I'm trying to think about something else and then I have to think about the kid,

it's like, I can't. And so I was like, oh, that's nice that J-Lo can perform. And also her older child could be there. And that's just a great thing. J-Lo doesn't have to stop and be like, oh, my brain has been taken over by thinking about being a parent. Right, right. No, I think that also it shows a level of respect that J-Lo has for her daughter to be

able to have her on stage and be like, I trust that you're going to do your fucking thing and you're going to kill it. And that is such a level of respect. I love it. And it didn't seem like, I think that what I liked about it is it didn't seem like creepy stage mommy, right? Like it wasn't like, you know, you better do this. Like it just didn't seem.

Or over, yeah, or pressuring like, you need to show me how good of a mother I, you know, show everyone how good of a mother I am right now. Like, yeah, it doesn't have that vibe to it. And I guess like the thing that's creepy about like kids performing sometimes is that it seems like it's the parents, like at least the stereotype is that like dance moms. It's like, you know, parents wanting to live vicariously through their children. J.Lo has to live vicariously through no one. And that doesn't necessarily mean that it's like not a coercive thing.

It couldn't possibly be coercive to bring your child on stage. But it just didn't have any of those creepy vibes. It just seemed like a fun, like a fun mother kid, you know, bonding thing, which I think is great. I know. And we do need to talk about. So the talk of the town was that Jay-Z and Beyonce didn't stand during the national anthem. the amazing performance that Demi Lovato gave of the National Anthem, which again, that's another worm time I've been going into is the

demi, like the life of Demi Lovato and she did a great job. And a lot of people are comparing her to Whitney and I don't think we can compare her to Whitney per se. But I saw one person's Facebook comment being like, why is anyone even trying anymore? Whitney did the best one ever. I'm like, um, okay, uh, so they have to do it every year. and the person probably wants to give the best performance they could give. Yeah.

I agree. Whitney Houston did the best performance probably ever of the national anthem. But like, yeah, yeah. Like, Demi Lovato, what, do you want her to phone it in? Because Whitney Houston did a really good job the performance back of the 90s. Yeah. And Debbie Lovato killed. She did great. Yeah.

And I don't know. Whatever. This is, I feel like this is like a whole toilet flush episode. But like, I feel like when a guy does the national anthem, I don't see. people posting about how like he didn't do it, you know, never compare it to Whitney Hughes. Why are we comparing Dimmie LaVotte's performance to what he uses? They're both good performances. They're both amazing performances.

I don't think it's a whole toilet flush. These are things that we need to discuss. Yeah, this is, the toilet flush has come into the mainstream, man. That's right. We can't. There are. The waters are rushing all around us. But am I crazy?

Like, I feel like why, I don't know, why specifically hurt just because she gave a good performance? But also, why do I get? and it's just one person online, but why do I get your shitty comment, like, like, kind of, in so many words, being like, in every way, fuck off, Demi Lovato,

because Whitney Houston gave a better, gave the greatest all-time performance of the national anthem. I should, like, read you verbatim the comment, but it literally broke it down, was like, Whitney had better this, better this, better vibrato, she had better breath control.

It was like, fuck off. Why are you doing this? It's weird. I mean, I should say that, you know, being of toilet flush territory, I find it very hard to feel any feelings about the National Anthem whatsoever.

And so... Damn, dude. But I also feel like the idea of holding a candle for a performance from the late 90s and comparing every performer... It's just like... It's so weird. Whitney Houston did everything better.

Yeah. She's the greatest. I literally put that performance on if I want to give myself like a fake ASMR body tingles sensation. Like, that's what I do to get that feel. But I also got the same tingles in watching Demi Lovano,

but I think... When you just hit that note, isn't that like, it's in like the brown note or you shit yourself? Yes. It is the brown note. It's the dingle note. It's the shivy note. Yeah, it's that tingle note, dude. It's the tingle note floats my boat.

Sorry, America. I think that's pro-American. I think it's okay. I think you're welcome America. Yeah, you're welcome America. But then Jay-Z and Beyonce, who were watching the Super Bowl, didn't stand. and everyone flipped out about it because they assumed that they were making a political stance.

And I kind of, I've never, I've never identified with them more than when Jay-Z came out and said, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, wait, wait, wait, wait. They were just sitting there and talking, she said, he said, we were talking about how beautiful Demi Lovato looked and how she sounded and what she's going through

and her life for her to be on the stage. We were so proud of her. And then it finished. And then my phone rang and it was like, you didn't stand up. And I'm like, whoa, whoa, what? Wait, wait, wait, wait. And like, apparently Beyonce was also sitting and talking about like, oh my God, I remember being that nervous right before I did this.

And like the other two times she did the Super Bowl show that they were just having, they were having a conversation and just talking about how beautiful it was and how she was really killing it and then just didn't stand up. They're both like super Uber musicians at the top of their game. Like obviously they could. easily end up like over analyzing a performance and forgetting to do that. I think they happened, I don't know, actually. I'd have to look it up.

I don't know if they've been supportive of the Copernick thing in the past. Well, they did say Jay-Z insisted that he and Beyonce would never have made a political move with their eight-year-old daughter, Blue Ivy present, saying, we wouldn't do that to Blue and put her in that position. He later noted that the couple didn't have to make a silent protest because halftime performers Jennifer Lopez and Shakira were making the loudest statement on stage with their Latin influence show. Which begs the question, Molly, will you use your children to avoid making political statements

in the future? It's an interesting, I don't think that, I don't think that, like, teaching, I don't think that there's anything inherently propagandistic about making a political, about showing what you believe in around your kids. Right, right, right. I think that, I think if they believe that you should stand in solidarity with Kaepernick, then you should do that around your kids. I think it's more the fact that they didn't force Blue Ivy to make the choice.

You know, and I totally get, I, you know, I stand Jay-Z and Beyonce, but they're also like, I feel like they're both, I don't know what they did around Kaepernick particularly, but they're both, Jay-Z, I think especially, but both of them, they're kind of like famously, like not political, and I think they, like, try to stay out of it. I respect that that's the choice they make. I wish they would make a different choice, but, like, I'm not at all surprised to hear them be like, that was an accident, because they just don't really do that, you know. So here we go. On the count of three, let's all scream who we're voting. for in the private. It's Jason Momoa. That's who I'm voting for.

My God, I love it. I'm voting for Jason Mamoa, especially after seeing his Super Bowl ad, which I don't know if you guys watched it, but it made me have Cats flashbacks. And I don't know if it's because of cats of why they did that. But just like Jenny Annie Dots, which was played by Rebel Wilson and Cats, Jason Momoa in this rocket mortgage commercials, he says that the actor says dodging paparazzi as he heads home, he wants to kick back and be totally comfortable in my own skin. And then he starts zipping off of his body skin. He takes his muscular arms off to reveal skinny arms. He takes his big torso off to

reveal a tiny torso. And he removes his hair to show a big bald spot. And I actually, Low-key kind of, Molly and I commiserate on this before we, loki kind of hated a lot of the commercials this time around, as has been the trend lately for us, personally. And I found myself laughing at this commercial. Yeah, he can do, I'll enjoy anything that Jason and Moeller does. Not the way that Jackie will, but, you know, on a slightly dialed down way. Yeah.

Yeah. You may not, nothing super sexual. I think that he is very sweet and fun and funny, but I do not feel for him. You don't want him to sort of. grab you and throw you up in the air like he would with like a small daughter or something like that. The way that Jackie feels for Jason and Moa is not the way that I feel. But then you start watching him go around as he travels

and he goes to kids' hospitals and goes in like, there's this video of him visiting a bunch of kids in a hospital and this kid who seems like he's not doing very well. And he's like, all right, you want to come at Aquaman for a, what is it called? A fist, not a fist fight. what it's called. I'll push it down.

Oh, Mystic cups. What is it? A bump? What do you put your elbow on the tape? Oh, arm wrestling. Arm wrestling? Arm wrestling?

Arm wrestling? I thought you did fisticuffs, right? No, no, he doesn't challenge the sick child to fight him. Right, that would make sense. To him arm wrestling competition and then like puts up a quote unquote good fight and then like lets him win. You know, like that kind of thing. It's very adorable is what I'm fucking. saying. I've been saying it's adorable and I love

I like Jason Momoa. But you like him for more than his work in children's hospital. Yeah, you want his fucking dirty dick, you piece of shit. Brother Reed from, this story must be told here. And without any context whatsoever, here's a piece from an episode titled, When You

Watch Me, I take the sword out of the sheath and stand up. This is my bus, I point the sword at her. I command it wherever I want. She begins screaming then, yanking on the cord, and everyone is up and out of their seats. The bus squeals to a stop and I fall down on top of the sword.

I feel a strange division open up on my forehead, folds of brow suddenly separate. I have to close one eye so the blood doesn't get in. The driver is out of his plastic enclosed driving booth, a can of pepper spray in one hand, and the microphone for the bus PA and the other. Get off the bus, sir. The PA buzzes. I point the sword right at him. The story must be told.

Yeah, well, you know who is Nick I don't want, and that's Baby Nut? And we need to talk about Baby Nut. Because it's a baby, I guess, or whatever. But, oh, yeah. It's a peanut. I think it was our buddy Kephart, who turned to me while we were watching the game,

while we saw that commercial, it was like, somebody's cashing in on the baby, to money and I know that's not the he was the first person to think that but like in today and in this day and age where things are just internet cool things happen at such a rapid pace

corporations have never looked more like the old man like at the school trying to be like hey high schoolers I'm a cool dude yeah it's absolutely a hello fellow teens I absolutely hate it it's so annoying I hate it

I just imagine the marketers just being in so it so it's like if you guys I don't know if you saw that they killed off Mr. Peanut and then in the Super Bowl ad, now there's Baby Nut who's a baby peanut and he has a little hat on. And I'm not going to say that Baby Nut is not very cute. He's a very cute little baby nut. But it really is, I can imagine the PR people just being like, don't you see? They like it with a baby face on it. Get a baby face in here. And again, this was Capard. I think again saying this. It's so true. They learned nothing from Baby Yoda.

Baby Yoda was practical. Was a puppet. Right. This fucking nut is like this digital dumb cartoon looking thing. They learn nothing. Yeah. The Baby Yoda thing I'm fine with,

that what ads, this, I feel like that voice. I don't agree with some of Baby Yoda's politics, but. Whoa. The ad voice that you just did, Jackie, I picture when I watch these fucking commercials.

and the reason they make me so mad is because I don't picture like an old guy doing a PR pitch like Mad Men style. I picture some bitches who are our age who are in this boardroom being like, you know what, millennials love. They love cookware or whatever. It's literally bizarro us three. Yes. It's like some weird alter. And I say this with absolutely no malice in my heart to people who work in ad agencies because I know and love many people who work in ad agencies, creative and funny people can get good work and ad agencies.

And so it's not actually the people that are doing that work. Doing what's in the bruiser, like every story starts out with they were a copywriter. Yeah. Like every, almost every story. There are not very many ways to make, you know, a halfway decent living and especially if you're a creative person. So like, but I think that for that reason it feels extra close to home. It's like, I know who the people are in that room.

And they're smart and funny people. But because of the way that we like structured things, it's like we have to be like, let's get into the millennial mind. And I feel very targeted by these ads to be like millennials think this way. And we're going to like make millennials like baby Yoda. Let's make a baby peanut. And it just feels so like it just feels very heavy handed. And it feels like they're trying to like reach into our collective brains and then sell it back to us. And it makes me cranky.

You know what it's like there should be a word for it. like how we have, I feel seen. It's like the negative version of being seen. Yes, it is exactly that. Exactly. It's like the shitty, I don't know what it is. Sheen, shitty and seen. I don't know, something, but I can tell they're trying to make me seen.

You're trying to see me. And you're sort of seeing me. But you're seeing like a real shallow version of me. You know what you did? You forgot me. That's what you fucking did. You forgot me. And that's what the problem is.

They forgot who they're talking to and who they're trying to. who we're trying to sell to. You're trying to sell, and I feel this way most of all with Subway ads, because it's like, oh, do you're just a little bit hung over, sleeping in,

don't you wish you had these nice sheets? Oh, you don't like to cook because you work so hard. Here's a seamless ad. And, like, you know, don't you love cookware? Here's the cookware delivered to your house. And I feel like it's like...

Oh, that was the one you said. That was like, yeah. Pot getting delivered. No, no, no, the best is, yeah, getting delivered pot to your house. Now that I'm 30, pot delivery takes on a whole new meaning. And I was just looking at this and fuming. I was like, 30-year-old still smoke weed.

Don't stop smoking weed. And my response, too, to Molly, we were talking about this far as, the quickest way to let me know that you do not actually smoke weed is to call it pot. And that has been the case since I was in high school. Do you want a slice of marijuana? I do the pot sometimes. I do the pot kids. About for me.

Do you guys want some pot delivery? I'll call my pot delivery guy. Oh, it's funny because it's actually a cooking pot. It's like, yeah, you didn't actually see me for shit. You think that I'm like, they think that millennials are like, you like to work hard and you like to play hard and you like nice things to show there. And like, of course I buy all that shit because we're all like, we all live in society. And I want nice sheets.

But I just feel so frustrated by that, like, And that was how I fell all through the Super Bowl ads. I was like they're trying to have this like, like I almost wish that it was just like, Mr. Clean, he cleaned your house instead of being like, are you so cool? Here's an ad that's going to make you feel really cool about your life. But also speaking of Mr. Clean,

who also bumped into Daddy territory because now Mr. Clean is swole as fuck. And it's like, don't you want to watch a man like this clean your house? Where it's also someone that is very sexual in nature. It is kind of fun to watch ads be like, why don't we turn up the fuckability of cleaning house? Is Mr. Clean really the guy who you've been wanting to sleep with

when your husband is at work? I mean, now it is. If I only had to market to Jackie, I would be the most successful copywriter on the planet. Mr. Peanut, but make him somebody you want to fuck. But has it just a big human penis hanging off of the bottom of a fucking nut.

I don't want a fucking nut. But what if he was Mr. Peanut, but he was a human? but he was dressed in like a sexy peanut. He was kind of rough with you. You know what I mean? The only thing is I've definitely, I've definitely been with people that like wear, you know, that like have the fun,

put it monocles and top hats. You called a guy. She referred to one of the men. She was, I guess I'll use air quotes for this one. Dating. Actually, I called it Mr. Peanut. She called a Mr. Peanut. Yeah, I did.

So I did, I did date a Mr. Peanut. Wait a minute. Yes. You dated a guy who wore a monocle. Well, it was more with the fashion canes that were unnecessary, and yes, had monocles. You dated a guy who used a fashion cane unnecessarily and wore a monocle. Also, I assume, unnecessarily? Yes.

Really, wait a minute. Can we re-record the show and start with this? Yeah, right? Where have you been? That you didn't know that. I don't know. When was this? It was short-lived.

It was before Gothel. daddy, you know, it's not goth daddy. He doesn't have a monocle for play either. No. Did he squint up his face to keep the monocle in? Yeah, he usually would attach it onto his hats. He didn't be saying this loud. It hurts my chest. Yeah, you would take it off and it would attach it. It would made me think that was around the time when I was thinking about getting a nose piercing so that I could pierce my nose and have it attached my ear because I think that's still very sexy, but I'm scared of getting my nose pierced

because I have a lot of snot. And, you know, I like the way he used his monocle. Wow. I really want to, I don't know why either you didn't tell me or B, I didn't start asking. Start asking. Right. So what are the accessories of the men you've been dating lately?

Can we get into that a little? Well, Jeff does have a lot of skulls. There's a lot of bones involved in our decoration. This is all true. Yeah, he's got good accessories. It's great. He's great. He's fine. Yeah. He does. He works it. Fanny packs right now. Lexi got a fanny pack too. So she joined the Legion. Fanny pack life is real, bro. It's great. I want to go the second one. Oh, you should. But first, we have to get to the list. Oh! Who's on the list? Jackie!

Gotta have that list. Well, we didn't even talk about the Oscars at all because Oscar's going to be this weekend, but we are going to talk about the Oscars on this list because we're talking about epic mistakes and unplanned moments at the Oscars throughout the years. So again, they're going to do the no host thing. Hopefully that works out well for them. Are you guys going to watch this weekend? Of course. I would like to try to have people over, but it is just exhausting to even send a text about that. You know what I mean? I'm like, who should we invite? We're like, I don't know. Jack? Who's Jack? You know what it's a nightmare? But anyway, That could be my name.

That's Jackie. Jackie's Browder. Is it Jaggy? Come over. All right. Okay. I'll come over. Well, of course we have to kick off in 2017

when La La Land wins best picture and then doesn't. That was such a huge. So it was when Faye Dunaway and Warren Beatty named La La Land is the year's best picture at the end of the 2017 broadcast, only to be corrected that in fact it was moonlight that had won best picture. That was fantastic. Crazy. And there was so much racial, weird tension behind those two films even being nominated. So the drama for that to go down was crazy that year. That was a good moment. That was one of those moments where I was like, oh, fun shit's happening. All right. And by the way, I'm actually one of the only people I feel like that I know that really liked La La Land. But also, Moonlight was fucking amazing. Like even as a person who, even as a La La Land defender, I am happy that Moonlight won.

I also, though, it's like, I don't want anyone to have that happen to them where they think they won. Yeah, I don't wish that on anybody. Even people who would make a musical without casting professional singers and dancers. I was so angry. What would you rather cats or La La La Land? Damn it. I was so angry when La La Land won, which is why I will always remember that moment because I was pretty hammered. I was already screaming.

Then when Moonlight got it, which, but it's these screw-ups that I don't really understand when it comes to the Academy, which we didn't even talk about, too, that earlier this week that the Oscar quote-unquote predictions were tweeted out by the Academy and everyone thinks it possibly that they were the actual winners, like the Oscar winners.

But then what do you do in this situation? So you may have accidentally told the entire world who won the Oscars a week before the Oscars and then they're like, no, no, no, oh, that's just a prediction. We just have this, like, prediction thing that we're using now. So then what do you do? Do you go and change them? Did you change it up?

Yeah, man. I feel like, personally, I change it up. Got to change a couple that nobody notices, you know? I mean, I was fine with the winners, though. It's like, you know, it's Parasite wins a lot of stuff. It's like that kind of stuff. Mara Dern. Yeah, I'm into what they put out.

It's, but now we'll, I guess, but we're never going to know. We're never going to know. We're never going to know if that was the actual thing. Unless it's the same exact, if it's the same exact one for one, then we know. You know, yeah, that's the thing. Then we definitely know they fucked up. My other question is, I wonder how this affects like Vegas shit. You know what I mean?

I wonder how, like, a weird, speculated mistake like that affects, like, the odds and shit in Vegas. Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? I usually throw down a little bit of money on something for, like, the Oscars. Really? Oh, like, yeah, between like, well, my wife, like, we like to, she likes to bet on stuff. I lost the Super Bowl. I lost.

Although good for them, though, with the team, and they hadn't had the win, though. I had to give her $20 and make her a hello fresh. Oh, that's pretty great. See, that's a good one. Although, I will say I was in Miami during the Super Bowl. I was not at the Super Bowl, but I, on the way to the Super Bowl, because I flew out the day before, I was on a plane with, it must have been family members of the 49ers or something, because everyone was dressed for the Super Bowl,

because I'm coming from California. And then when we got off the plane, which I was so tired, but I did burst into tears because it made me smile. There was a lot, there was two lines of people that had confetti and were like all dressed in 49ers shit as people were coming off of the plane. And everyone's like screaming and chanting. And I was like, I get sports. Okay.

I see what's happening here. It made me smile. It's fun. Yeah, the feel good aspect of sports is something that I also enjoy. And also that you have to earn it. You know what I mean? Not necessarily that you're on the team, but like your team has to earn it for you to celebrate. You don't just celebrate like for the July you celebrate or whatever.

You know what I mean? Every year. It's whatever. Everyone gets it. Yeah, but then if your team is losing, then I have to really tell myself like it's okay. You don't need to be desperately upset about this. That's the thing about sports I don't understand is like having it ruin your night and like crying about. it and stuff like that. Unless again, you lost a lot of money. But we can't forget when

John Travolta introduced Adela D'Zeme as Adela D'Ezem. I'll never forget. Never forget. I love that. Adel Dazim. He was so proud of himself. He did surprise himself. For some reason, I will never know why. And this is kind of fun when Lawrence Olivier forgot to announce the nominees. He said in 1985, he was after being introduced as a present, of the award for Best Picture during the 1985 Academy Awards, Lawrence Olivier received a standing ovation. Instead of naming each nominee, the four-time Oscar winner simply announced Amadeus.

That's amazing. He didn't even say the nominees. Apparently in 1974, there was a streaker that went through the 46th Academy Awards. That's kind of fun. That's fun. And then we also had another wrong winner in 1964 when Sammy Davis Jr. announced the wrong winner. They said, while presenting the winner for best music score

for an adaptation or treatment, Davis announced John Addison as a winner for Tom Jones. He promptly returned to the microphone to retract his announcement, telling the crowd, they gave me the wrong envelope, wait till the NAACP hears about this. So there's another envelope? Yeah, how do you get the wrong envelope?

I don't know. How did that happen? Yeah, with La La Land too, what was the explanation? The theory was that with La La La Land, he had been given the best, actress envelope. And so when he opened it, it said Emma Stone, La La Land. Oh, that makes sense. And that is the speculation. My God, I love Emma Stone. But I think that there was a lot of the

hubbub about it was that like there are, I mean, this is the whole, the agency, the ad agency that they have that does the envelopes. It's like you had one job, you know, which is to give the correct envelope. But presumably even better systems in place now than in 1964, although maybe not. Emma Stone is like my memoa. Yeah, I feel like a lot of guys have that for Emma Stone. It's weird. I don't maybe like it even, but it's there. I understand.

I think that she's attractive, and I think that she is good at what she does, and she's just not my type, and that's okay. She's so pale. She's real pale and bug-eyed. Yeah, I love it. I like anime eyes, as evidenced by my wife and paleness, as evidence by my wife. I love big, big old cartoon eyes. Uh-huh.

I want you to look as much as much. like a cartoon character as possible. When I was in high school, a boy told me that my eyes reminded him of Japanimation. Yeah? Yeah. I always call it Lexi when we first started seeing each other, which is actually very sad if you know this story. But I told her and I still feel this way that she reminds me of the girl squirrel squirrel squirrel and sword in the stone. But then sort in the stone actually is very sad because like the guy, he becomes a real boy and then the girl's heart's heart gets broken.

And she's like, boiler alert. And she starts crying. It's on Disney Plus, by the way. And she's just like, and the crying sounds of this girl, squirrel voice actress will melt her heart. Oh, no. Am I going to have to watch this? All right, I'll watch it.

By the way, Jackie, Mad Mad and Mim is like your fucking spirit animal, by the way. I don't know if I have ever seen Sword in the Stone. I haven't. It is probably my favorite Disney movie. It's definitely on Disney Plus. We watched it on, like, Christmas Day with like Lexi's, family. And I love that movie. That is like the best. And Mad Mad Mim!

It's so good. All right. All right. Good wreck. Yeah, definitely watch it. But also, this is your time to show. Wait a second. I just looked up a picture of Mad Mad Mim. Wait a second. I'm offended. It's not in her looks. It's not her looks. It's her attitude. Oh, okay. Girl. Oh yeah. I see that this little music symbol and it says the line, I'm an ugly old creep. Whatever. It's what I think of ready.

It's exactly of you. We're going to have a conversation is what's going to happen. All right. Type in girl squirrel, sword in the stone, and look at that girl squirrel and tell me she is not Lexi. Bring her up holding. Okay, yes, definitely. Definitely.

That is so Lexi, dude. Oh, my God. It is Lexi. I love it. Oh, my God. Even the way that she takes care of you. Wait, her picture is fading. Why would that be?

Oh, no. I've seen that photo a million times, and yet it grows darker within the second. What's going to happen? Some foul God bespoke upon a word to deem me go sightless yet again? I think I'm going. What? Blind items. We can't see them.

Welcome to blind items, everybody. You're welcome. I just got to really get loose in my goose right now. Oh, yeah, you got to loosen her up. It's a bit of a juice goose, goose, these items that are blind this week. So feel free to be frightened. Feel free to be relaxed. I'm both.

Think about your mother situation or whatever, Jackie, maybe. I love my mother. Interesting. The A-List country star who got her start on reality television had a wild week of partying at levels not seen in many years. Strange things happen when she starts partying like this. Kelly Clarkson. No. A-list celebrity, they said singer or actor?

Yeah. Oh, I feel like I forgot the juiciest part that's maybe revealed in the link that goes with it. She canceled like some major shows because of her partying. She started and you said reality television? Yes. Who's the other one that's a country singer that started in reality television? Oh, what's her name? She's the country singer from American Idol.

It rhymes with Karanda Bambert. Miranda Lambert. Wait, what reality show did she start on? I don't know. It's got her start reality television. Yeah, that's not who I'm thinking of. I'm thinking of why can I only think of the name Casey Musgraves, but that's not what I'm trying to say. Blind at him ever.

I just assumed she started on stupid. Who's that blonde girl? from American Idol from like season four, you know, the country won. Carrie Underwood. Thank you. Okay, in 2003, she finished in third place on the television program Nashville Star. I just assumed

she was an American Idol person. No, no, I didn't realize that she did that. Yeah, Nashville Star was the singing competition which aired on the USA Network. I really like Miranda Lambert, but it does make sense because I think that she's going a bit, it seems, or at least what we're, if I'm picking up what they're putting down,

she's definitely spinning a little out of control in this new relationship I think that she's having a lot of fun is what it seems like but I think that she was on the track that she really wanted to like get married have kids all the thing and then the divorce happened

I think that she's kind of just seems I mean I don't know her obviously but it seems like she might be spinning out a little bit that's the Brad Paisley divorce right Blake Shelton Blake Shelton thank you as soon as I said Brad Paisley So yeah, she had to cancel

Oh, God, three shows. Damn. Big arena shows. She said she was sick. It was funny in her Instagram post she wrote like, she literally wrote like, I'm medicating myself, which just means to me she's just smoking weed. But yeah, she, what was it?

All in Texas. Corpus Christi and Thursday, Friday, and Austin. Oh, no, that's a couple years ago. Oh, my God, I'm terrible right now. But she canceled a bunch of shows. I know she canceled. Oh, so if it was a couple of years ago, it's probably during the, like, with the divorce and everything

and like when she was having her party in days. Right. Wait, so Blake Shelton's with Gwen Stefani, right? Yes. I really feel like he, I don't understand how he came out on top. I mean, she is married to a very hot cop, but it seems like there's a lot of controversy around their relationship. And also because he's not in the world,

and it seems like she wanted someone not in the world, of Hollywood at all. And he was like, the whole thing, I'm not even to get into it. It seems like he had rough stuff with past exes. Like he's got an ex that was pregnant with his child and she didn't realize that he was even marrying somebody else. And like, there's a whole issue with it.

Okay, so here's the update. It was Salt Lake City and then Denver. And this was just the other day. Her Instagram post said, Dear Salt Lake City, I'm so sorry to announce that I'm having to reschedule the show tonight. I've been doing everything in my power to be 100%, but my voice is just not there, not even close. I'm so sorry to let everyone down. Since I'm not well, we thought it would be better to come back and give y'all, y'all, of course, the best show we can. We will be back here

on Tuesday, February 28th, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Tickets will be honored. And I am medicating and resting and I'm praying I will be better to play Denver tomorrow. Thanks for understanding whatever, blah, blah, blah. And then she ended up canceling Denver the next day as well. Going on tour must be really hard if you're going through some shit. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Are you kidding me? You rip it up.

Also, it does kind of scream like, that's what happens when you party really hard. You fuck up your voice. Yeah. You, you know, you just don't, I don't know. I can see it going both ways. I can see her being actually sick, but I could also very easily see her. You party too hard. That's totally how it manifests.

Like, yeah. Brutal. Very brutal, but not as brutal as this. Actually, this isn't that brutal. The speculation about engagement for the A-plus list singer was all carefully crafted to get people talking. It is no different than Jennifer Aniston cradling her stomach on a red carpet. So this is an engagement. This is a subject I keep shoehorning into the show because I love it so much.

Wait, they're a singer? It says A-plus list singer. It's a woman. And it's about the speculation over an engagement. Oh, with Taylor Swift. Of course with Taylor Swift. And sorry not sorry I'm bringing up again, but also we have not talked about Miss America. Marikana and Molly, I'm already mad at you for not watching.

I almost watched it last night. Oh, you almost did? Hold, you have to understand I have about 45 minutes when I can watch something before I fall asleep. But I did. I was like, I have to watch this. I have told him's going to be so mad at me if I don't watch it. I am mad at you. It is very good.

And I don't care. The children are not an excuse for me. I've heard that it's very good. I want to watch it. We will talk about it on talking TV. Don't worry. Did you watch it, Jackie? Because you were like, I don't want to watch it.

I did. You watched it? I watched it. Wait, are you acting like you didn't enjoy it? I might be. I don't know. I guess people are going to have to check into talking TV to see what I thought. I cried.

Multiple times. That's really good. I'm proud of you. I loved it. I'm proud of me too. Can I watch it in two installments? Oh, yeah. I mean, and then re-watch it a bunch because it's free on Netflix and like, why wouldn't

you re-watch it? It's really good. This is our place. We make the rules. That fucking song. Lover is such a good song. So the reason why I want to bring this up is I actually just feel like it's hilarious because fans are convinced in a scene in the new doc that a scene in the new doc shows off an engagement ring. When InStyle asked Lana Wilson about it, she said, whoa, who directed it, she said, whoa, I'm going to have to revisit that scene.

What I think is so funny about this and people are saying like this engagement ring, quote unquote, is like a cat ring that she's sported in the past and therefore not an engagement. ring. But what I think is hilarious is it's this scene, spoiler alert, where she's like, the scene I cried at, where she's like tears in her eyes defending herself against her management team to say, you know, I'm going to start speaking out about this stuff and this politically and things. And the team like telling her, no, you can't do it. And her like fucking in this amazing moment in the movie, like standing up for herself and saying, I'm going to fucking do this. And you're not going to tell me no anymore. And I just think it's, It's hilarious and everyone's like, oh, my, OMG, is she engaged?

To him I'm a man. Like, in this, like, powerful seed, that's what you're thinking about. You were doing the exact opposite of what she's asking every woman in this country to do. That's awesome. And I just like, what are we doing, guys? So funny to me. So that's why I wanted to do that blind. I couldn't believe it.

I couldn't believe it. If it was any other scene, if you went there's even a scene, like, where she, like, is with Joe Alwynn and all that stuff. Like, but of course they pick literally the one where I was like, I love it. Like, you know what I mean? So anyways, I thought that was good and I hate you for not liking the movie. We're going to talk about it. Yeah, we're going to talk about it. We're going to have a conversation about it.

Last one. Guys, this one's, you know, check it out. Okay? This A-list, mostly movie actress is a multiple Oscar winner slash nominee. me. She gave up her first class seat on the train this morning and made her team give up their seats too so a woman with two kids and an infant could use them instead. It's a, it's a positive blind item. I couldn't believe it. I was shocked. A positive blind item. Yes. Wow. What is her, what's her stats again? She is a mostly movie actress and is a multiple

Oscar winner slash nominee. Merrill Streep? No, one of the of the Oscars. I don't know if she won for this, but she's known for a musical movie for sure. Anne Hathaway. Absolutely. You think Anne Hathaway would do this? I don't know. She was up for laymise. She won. Did she win?

Yeah. I liked your performance. I had a dream my life would be so different. Musical. Sexier musical. René Zell Wager. Yay. Go for her.

She was recently spotted looking bright and happy at the Gar-Dunord station in Paris, France on Monday, a train station. I love this story. That's why it's a positive blind item. It's because it's from overseas. It's not from here. That's why it's a nice thing. I love this fucking blind.

I was like shocked. I've never seen a positive blind item in the blind item. Y'all, throwing this out there. Watch Judy. She's fucking great. I need to watch Judy. Yeah, I want to watch Judy too. I want to try to catch it before the Oscars.

She did such... She's going to win now that we... I mean, we all know she's going to win. So apparently, according to the Academy, she did such a good job of like not... It's not cartoonish at all. She did... I mean, she really tapped into and made it her own at the same time

because she knows she's never going to be Judy Garland. Like, you can't be Judy Garland, but you can do a great job of being like Judy Garland, and she did such a good job. I do really want to see it because I feel like... Yeah, I feel like... Renee was, I still have like a very like early 2000s association with Renee Zell Wicker of like Bridget Jones Diary in Chicago and being like, yeah, she's fine, but like I've never been like

she's amazing. And so when I saw she was Judy Garland, I was like, I don't know. But then I have heard nothing but incredible things about it. I can see again and I can see my friends. Blind items is over and I am so happy to say. I'm proud of you. Yeah, on with the showver. We have to get out of here because we've been talking for way too long. I don't know what happened. We just kept going and, you know, it happens sometimes. You know why I think it's because we enjoy each other's company and isn't that kind of nice?

And why can't that be nice every once in a while? We're allowed to. We are allowed to enjoy each other. And we're also allowed to say thank you guys so much for joining us this week on page 7. Wasn't that so, I'm so like, you know what it is? I'm earthy. That's what everybody says. Jackie, she's blue. You are all earth tones right now. You might, oh my God, you're like the opposite of an indigo child.

Yeah, you're right. I'm an earth bitch. I'm an earth full grown woman. And this full grown woman is excited about our move to Spotify. And we got, I mean, this show is going Spotify exclusive on Valentine's Day. Yes, it's coming up February 14th of 2020, but new releases and the entire back catalog of this show, which I think we've been doing this for 10 years will be Spotify exclusive. Molly, we've been doing this for almost 10.

I think we've been doing it for 10 years. Wow. Yeah, we've been doing it for a long time. Every week we do it. And if you haven't tried Spotify, it's free to download and use on any device. No credit cards needed. And all of our episodes are already over there. So you can listen to 10 years of us getting older.

And now the fact that I not only just talk about still wanting to have sex, with people, but also possibly wanting to have children. One of the co-hosts has two children at this point. Two of them are married. This is nuts. You can listen to us grow up. Go back through those 10 years worth episodes and you're going to see us go on a journey. Right.

Quite a journey. Yeah, you follow us through our 20s. So thank you guys for always following us through our 20s. And all you're going to do is simply search for our show in Spotify to start listening for free. You can download all episodes for offline listening with a free account. And with Spotify, you know what? You can listen all your favorite podcasts here on LPN and anything else you want to put into your ear holes and your music all in one place.

So, you know what? Listen to page seven, free on Spotify. Knock, knock, Jackie. What is it? Patreon.com for slash page seven podcast. Five bucks a month for a free. It's not free. It's five dollars a month.

But it's a bonus episode every single week. We talk about the moon. We talk about scary creatures. Only that. Yeah, it's only the moon and scary creatures. It's called talking TV, but we never discuss it. We only talk about different scary creatures, the boogeyman we talk about,

and we talk about the different craters of the moon. So check that out. Patreon.com forward slash paid seven podcast. You can follow me on Twitch. Twitch.tv.tv. Holdenators ho. And you can also follow me on... My name is Jackie Zerresky.

You follow me on Instagram at Jack That Worm. And I'm J.K. L.C.L. on Instagram. Also, we have a new Instagram account called page 7 LPN and you should check it out and Natalie's doing some great work over there posting some fun

stuff so check her out. We got pitches for y'all. We love you and we will talk to you next week. Bye guys. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors you can support our shows by supporting them. For more

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