Page 7 - Episode 357: The Good Ship Lollipop

Episode Date: June 11, 2020

We're feeling the power of the bitch this week as we goss about the Vanderpump Rules debacle, My Lottery Dream Home and this week in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner: did Steve Jobs fake his own death?!?!?Join Jackie's book club over on our Patreon page! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Yesterday I cried, must have been relieved to see the soft side. I can understand how you'd be so confused. I don't envy you. I'm a little bit of everything. All rolled into one. I'm a bitch. I'm a lover. I'm a child.

I'm a mother. I'm a sinner. I'm a saint. I do not feel a shame. I'm your. Hell, I'm your dream. I'm nothing in between. You know.

I am here. It is 2020. I'm a bitch and so are you. Welcome to page seven. Everybody's bitch right now. I am a Hold of McNally. I am a bitch. You are a bitch.

I am Molly Nethel. I'm also a bitch. We are bitches. I really enjoyed your fierceness just now, Molly, and I appreciated mine as well. Also a bitch. Everyone is bitch. And we are feeling the power. of the bitch right now.

And you know what? You got to take that power. You've got to harness it. You got to look up at the moon. You've got to put a rope around the moon. You've got to pull the moon all the way down. You've got to kiss the man on the moon's face. And he's going to say, miss, I'm not ready for this. And I say, yes, you are. Because I'm the sun, bitch. And he's scared that he hides. And then it's an equinox.

I don't know what happens on the moon eyes. Wait, wouldn't you be? Because isn't the moon, the woman? No. Whatever with the blood, the moon blood? Or whatever it is. This is really a very, very, It's a Wonderful Life, like, fan fiction right now. Dance by the light of the moon.

Remember when they sing that? Do what do you want, Mary? Do you want the moon? Just say the word and I'll throw a lasso around it and I'll pull it down. And then what, Judge? Oh no. And then you can swallow it.

No, you're gonna make me cry. And it'll come out your fingers and that's where I lose it. But I could probably keep going. You know, I get their thing, but I also thrown out there, I think Mary could have done better. Mary could have done better. Am I allowed to say that? What?

Sure. Yes. This is the most controversial thing you've ever said to me. Why? Why do you think Mary could have done better? He's always sweating. And it's just, you know, I know that he has... Oh, now you're talking about my people.

Now you're talking about my people. Yes, I'm attacking you. I'm a bitch. I'm being a bitch. And I think that, you know what? The road to hell is paved with good intentions. Well, you know what? I'm a lover.

Okay? And I feel that my sweating and secretions, putting that sort of juice and whatnot on my love partner, is a form of acknowledging my closeness to them. And it's giving them my water, much like we've seen in Dune, where they talk about giving your water to someone as a symbolic act when you cry for the dead. You give your water. You're right. I'm just projecting because I'm also a sweaty girl. I'm being a projection right now. But you know what?

It took him a long time to finally wise up, James Stewart. He's sweating because he's trying to save the town from a unabashed capitalist. He's got a lot going on. Your sights lower, George Bailey. That's what I'm saying. No, I love him. I can't even pretend. I'm trying to be a bitch.

I can't even pretend. Of course I love George Bailey. Of course I want him to love me. And of course, I wish it every time. bell rung that a bitch got her wings. But that's not reality. Where are my wings? Just drink a Red Bull?

They don't sponsor us. Actually, don't do that. Also, Red Bulls, every time I drink Red Bull, it forever makes me think of the time when I drank too much vodka Red Bull, and I puked inside of my purse. I was witty that night. And I zipped up the purse, and I left the purse in the corner of my room until you smell that purse.

That's when you know you never drink an energy drink ever again. That's how you get over it. That was back Brain and the Beast days back when me, Ben Kissel and Sina had a podcast together in which we said in talk. You think roundtable is bad. I'm so glad that I don't know where this stuff exists. That stuff, man. That's the true blue cancellation material right there. I think that was the first time I ever did a podcast before and I was on your podcast and I drank a bottle of vodka. You got hammered on Red Bull vodka and I remember that. You

were fierce, I will just say. There was a fierceness going on. That was crazy. There was an episode I didn't partake. There was an episode where everybody in the room was on cocaine. There was some crazy shit, except for me. There was some crazy shit going on back in the day. I'm just going to throw that out there.

I miss, thinking about Red Bull. So there was like an image going around, you know, two, three weeks ago now, which feels like a lifetime ago of a bunch of people pool partying in the Ozarks. And everyone was like, this is really bad because of COVID. but everyone was sharing this party and everyone was like, I would never even go to that party even without COVID and I was like,

man, I love bro shit. I love bro shit. I love bro culture. I love pool parties. Like with big sweaty idiots, I love Red Bull drinks. I love Jaeger bombs. I love Red Bull vodka.

I love wings. I love like a theme party. You have to take it back. We have to take it back for us then, you know? Yeah. I, hearing you talk about vodka red bull makes me want a vodka red bull so bad. That sounds terrific, even though I know that my body could not literally process it anymore. Like, I still want it.

Your belly's going to hurt. Your baby's going to hurt if you're going to start drinking those. I'll tell you that now. You know the same thing? Love a keg party. Oh, yeah. I still enjoy a keg party. Oh, yeah.

Man, I was just reminiscent about kegwifle ball the other day and thinking about, man, the days when we had nothing. We had nothing else to do. So we just put a keg at second base and man, you get, you can do whirly birds every time you land on second base. You got to catch the ball in your cup of beer to get three outs. It was, you know what, back in a time when we invented our own sports, where are the Calvin balls? You know what, I got to come up with my own sport. And I think it has going to have something to do with jattles and it has something to do with jumping over some sort of barrier. Mine's going to have some kind of a monster that appears at some point during the game

that will chase and attack you. Yes, well, maybe it'll be me. Either way, you have to dress up and I will figure out what the monster suit looks like. But yes, it will be monster ball. And essentially, it is just soccer. But, like, at a random point in time, a alarm will sound and a giant man dressed up like a monster will run out, or woman or whoever, and attack the players. What kind of attack?

Like hug attacks? Grab them, throw them to the ground. Yeah, kind of a huggy sort of thing. They can kind of push them around, maybe slap them a little bit. No punching or anything like that. Okay. I feel like there's two, in college, I was like there's at least two types of people. There's probably more.

But like there is the type of person who's like ideal night if they're drinking is to like, you know, make out with a bunch of people or one person, one new person or whatever. I love making out. That's fine. But I feel like there's another type of person who's ideal night. if they're drinking is to like play kickball, you know. And I feel like what you describe Jackie. Do an activity. Yeah, do an activity.

And especially like us, you know, sketch comedy, you know, people with sketch comedy in our blood. It's like, let's dress up and attack each other while drinking. Like that sounds perfect to me. Let's do Ket. And let's make drinking weirdly an activity like with the doing Keg Stans, ice luge. Right. All that kind of stuff. I want it to be a physical activity.

And maybe, you know, I feel some amount of, when we talked about Dungeons and Dragons, whenever it was, like, it doesn't really excite me to do, like, larping even, or to, like, play, to do those types of imagination games. I don't know why, even though I like creative things and creativity and stuff. But it does excite me to, like, yeah, dress up like a fucking idiot and do, you know, keg baseball. That sounds fantastic.

It's great. Yeah, but then at the same time, whenever it does. happened in front of him. Like, can we stop? Like, when Kessel will get too drunk and he decides to like try to wrestle Henry, like play wrestle? Uh-huh. When watching grown people play wrestle and I'm just like,

someone's going to get hurt. Never mind. It has to stop. Like, all my playfulness goes out the window because I'm just ready for them to be like, uh-oh, that's the day Henry accidentally got murdered. You know, and then we're going to watch it happen. And then I can never like have a jizzy ever again, because

every time I drink jizzies, I think about watching the light leave my brother's eyes and I just, I don't, I get scared by Kissel. He just, he doesn't mean to. He's a, he's a, he's like a pretty rabbit, you know? He pet Henry to death. But that's why I'm scared of sports.

But that's a whole other ballgame. Although I did go to my first drive-in movie theater this week. And that was very exciting. That's so exciting. I'm not going to say now I've heard everything, but Jackie, I just heard it all. Aren't you lamb bastard?

Is that how I use the word properly? Am bastard? My knees are knocking. Knocking. From what you just told me. That is what I was hoping for. I wanted to shake you. I wanted to break you.

All right. Oh, baby. What did you see? Am I getting horny? What's happening going on? Well, I went to a drive-in theater. I just assumed that when you were asked to go to a drive-in theater, that means you get to have sex in a car. Apparently, that is not true.

I just assumed because that is what 14-year-old me assumes that's what happens at the drive-in movie theater. But no, we are adults and we went to go see a movie we wanted to see. So no touching. Not even a finger. And it was your first? You never went when you were young? No. Really?

Never been around a place that had drive-in drive-ins. It's such a delight. It's a delight. I grew up going. There was some prom or homecoming that instead of going, we went to the drive-in movie theater. And it was, we lived like maybe half an hour from one. and it was just as wonderfully wholesome as you imagine and it's just such an awesome outdoor activity.

I wish that everybody in New York City had some sort of like power wheel they could get in so that we could just turn parking lots or streets into drive-ins and we could have some distancing because it's such a good idea right now. It's like such a perfect thing to do this summer. Yes, and I was like waiting to see. I was like, all right, where's all the debauchery?

I was waiting for debauchery, but no, like while people waited for the movie to start. They got out of the car and they all had masks on and they were throwing a football around. Like people from different cars. I was like, how, what was it? 1953? Wait a second.

So there's social distancing, but they're putting their grubby mitts all over a football and throwing them. They were in a family. They were a family throwing a football to each other. Yeah, you play. They were family. It's like a great picnic.

You go when the sun is still up and then you basically like picnic and play outside and then you all get to get in your car and like collectively watch a movie outside. It was delightful and it was very wholesome. Dude, y'all know how I feel about Ray Romano. But I feel like on this show, I love him in case you don't remember. I feel like on this show I don't talk enough about my obsession with Kevin James as well.

I love King of Queens. I adore Kevin James. And when I saw that Kevin James, he is playing a bad guy. in a horror movie. It's like a home invasion movie. Is it like an adult home alone? Yes, it's like a rated R home alone. And he plays, which also,

not to say this, but especially right now, it was kind of perfect. He plays a Nazi that gets out of jail. So the entire, and it's like with a horde of Nazis and it's this little girl murdering Nazis.

And so the entire time, she's like, get the Nazi, get the Nazi! And Kevin James plays, you know what, I'm not to say this, minus the Nazis. huge swastika tattoo on his head.

Outside of that, looking sex, he had this big, thick beard and a shaved head. I loved the bald head big beard combo. And he was great in it. I very much enjoyed it.

Again, screw you, rotten tomatoes with your percentage system. It was only in like the 60%s. What's it called? It's called Becky. Ah. I was, I thought it was a delightful little, um, little indie thriller. Awesome.

I had a great time. But we were so invested in it that I, uh, I was also upset because one of those other screens was playing back to back, Groundhog Day and then Jumongi. And I was like, I kind of want to go watch Groundhog Day and Jumongi. All right. Here's my movie pitch for an adult home alone. Are you ready for it? I'm just going to say it out loud and just whoever wants to write it, just write it

because I've tried multiple times, and I'm just cannot, I'm not good at coming up with fun traps and stuff. Okay, guy lives alone, like inherited the house from his family. He's like a loser guy, doesn't have a lot of friends,

he's got like one friend at work. None of this matters. Either way, he gets, he just doesn't have a lot of family to help him out. So you're talking about you at the age of 18, okay. 45, yeah. Oh, okay, 45. No, he's an older guy.

Wait, are we going to lose our friendships? What are you going to do? I don't know. Either way. Either way, is a guy, doesn't have a lot of friends, doesn't have any family living, really. He gets, someone breaks into his home, holds him up at gunpoint. You know, it's this awful traumatic experience for him. He, like, has a total freak out about it.

And then, in order to, he's like, okay, you know, and the cops can't do anything about it. They can't look at him or whatever. And he's so freaked out that it's going to happen again. He totally just, to the nines, sets up his house with booby traps. and he's working on the final trap he's on the roof and he's working on like this final trap that he has set up and he falls off the house

and bangs his head or whatever goes into a coma, wakes up totally amnesia. After a week or so the doctors are like all right you can go home now. Ooh. So has no memory of any of the traps has no, so it's like a person

home alone himself. Oh, that's kind of fun. That sounds like the trap inside of your brain of mental illness. Yeah, so yeah, we definitely deal with that and stuff as well, right? Like how we sabotage ourselves. That's a fun twist, though. Holden.

Isn't that fun? That is fun. Yeah, so that's the first little part of the movie. But then, and I kept sitting down and trying to write it. I was just like, I don't know. I'm so bad at coming up with fun traps. And like, I just, I never just could follow through with it. So anybody take it.

Well, watch the movie, Becky, because I don't know if I even want to give away the first kill. There's, there are many kills. But I need to just say this because of why it's so fun. Fun. First kill, she just did it with a ruler and colored pencils. 13 years old. It's fucking great. That's great. One time, years and years and years ago when I was teaching middle school theater, middle school theater class, and I asked the kids, what actor would you get to play yourself in your own biopic?

And my favorite answer was this kid, these like 13-year-olds. and this kid was like, oh, miss, you know the guy who plays Paul Blart Mallcop? And his best friend was like, oh, my God, totally missed. That's exactly right. And I was like so proud for a 13-year-old to have that level of like self-awareness. Like I, he was like, I am Dominican Paul Blart Mallcop. And it was, he was exactly right. And I just, I don't have a lot of love for Kevin James, but that gave me love.

for Kevin James. Yeah, fuck Kevin James. Whoa. I'm sorry, I'll take it back. I'd take it back. I was just messing around. Oh, damn you. I'm going to be playing mind games with you, Jackie, so enjoy that for the rest of the episode.

Like the John Lennon song? Yeah. Just like that? Yeah, but whatever with him. He was bad in the end. He is bad at it. He did turn out to be pretty bad. If I recall, though, Kevin James' stand up is like, it is PG.

It is that. It is a family-friendly. I used to watch it with my parents. My parents that don't really watch too much comedy anymore. And you know what? We all had a smile. Yeah, I will also say... I love him.

And I can be wrong, and I'm sure somebody will correct me in some comment chain somewhere. You are wrong. He sounds... From everything I've gathered, he seems to be one of those super successful, famous comedian guys that's actually nice. I think that's true.

And I'm pretty sure that's true. From what I've heard about him in general, usually people say he's like a really sweet guy. And anytime that's the case, you could literally be the worst hackiest comic ever, and I'd still appreciate you. I mean, that is exactly what we had thought about Mariah Carey before we did the Mariah Carey Pop History episodes. And especially before we saw what happened on the Shits Creek graduation Zoom that they did. So I think that you guys are fairly aware.

that a lot of celebrities and different people are doing little Zoom graduation, congratulations, broadcasts for the class of 2020 as a way to make up for the fact that they didn't get to, you know, have their graduation, have their senior prom, get to do all the things that a lot of people usually get to do at the end of their high school. But look, they get a bunch of celebrities talking at them that don't know them.

I believe our last podcast boys even did a little graduation thing this week. for the graduates. That's very sweet, guys. They did. It really enjoyed Henry's. Henry had a lot of fun with his. And the cast of Schitts Creek got together to do a Zoom graduation. And lo and behold, who, and my favorite part is that when I read this headline,

I was like, no fucking way that they didn't know about this until you watch the video. So Mariah Carey, who if you watch Schitts Creek, you know that Dan Levy is obsessed with Mariah Carey. But also, if you follow him, he also is obsessed with Mariah Carey in real life as well. And they're all singing the song Hero. And then Mariah Carey interrupts them, quote, unquote, to help them out and sing it with them. And it looked like Dan Levy was going to, he even screams, I'm going to have a heart attack before he burst into tears. They were so excited. And even to the point, one thing you're not even speaking towards is they all do this. in character.

In character. Which is so great. Like, Moira full on kills it. Like, everybody's playing their character up until the song. I miss it. I'm so mad. I know, I know that it's good. I know it's better when a show ends when, before you get sick of it.

But I'm devastated. I miss Schitt's Creek. Schitt's Creek was like, was the shining star of my television screen. And now it's gone. I know I've just been watching it over again. But, you know, we get to. watch this Zoom and I can't believe, I mean, obviously Mariah Carey did it just

for the, you know, I don't know if maybe nobody asked Mariah Carey to do her own. She did it for the publicity. But it was very funny. I don't know if you guys watched all the way through when her kids, when Mariah Carey's kids come in

to like be a part of it and she could just tell she doesn't want them. This is her moment to shine. It's a mouth's over to shine. How dare you? Get out of here.

But you know what she's saying here? Oh, beautifully. You all know how I feel about Mariah Carey. You know what? I did a lot of hate. But you know what? She is herself through and through. A thousand percent.

She's never pretended to be anybody else. Yeah, sorry. That actually got eclipsed recently by the 90-day fiancé before the 90-day season for Talk Back. Talk Back, yes. Because that was actually the greatest thing ever on. TV because I will say that it was a Zoom talkback, which in this case worked for everyone's favor because everyone was getting wine drunk.

Everybody's just popping off like crazy at other people because they can because they're not in the same room. If you want to hear Holden and I scream about this specific tell all because Holden Lexi and I yelled about it on talking TV, the show that we have on our Patreon, we yelled out about it for 51 minutes. Yeah, we definitely only talked about it. We're normally supposed to do around 30 minutes for a Patreon bonus to talk in TV, which has been getting longer and longer every time. And usually we talk about other shows, not just 90 day. We had so much to say.

Instead of being talking TV, it's just talking 90 day, right? Kind of. Dude, when reality people, when reality people take the clubs off at other reality people that are not in their segment or. situation. It is so fun to see like one person's hot take who is in a crazy relationship that you've been following about another person's situation that they're not they we you know what I mean? It's just God. And it's like whoa whoa whoa how dare you say that about them when you man they all hate each other too. Yeah it is specy spicy spicy. I the zoom zoom shows though

I'm like so I like I have started to have a bit of a panic attack the other day because I was I was like, what if shows can't go into production? And I have to keep watching these frickin' Zoom shows. Like, I sometimes on Friday nights, before I would go hang out with you guys, I would sometimes watch a very, very, very terrible show on HGTV called My Lottery Dream Home. And it's so dumb. Have we never talked about My Lottery Dream Home before? I don't think we have.

You watch it, too? Molly Henry and I have watched every episode of My Lottery Dream Home because the host is something. He is something. So Holden what this show is, the reason why I hate watch it so much is, it is about people that win the lottery and then this guy comes in of like, we're not talking about the taxes that get taken out, not talking about the property upkeep of how much,

So so many people spend the amount of money they won in the lottery on a house. Oh, God. Which is not what you are supposed to. Right. Or they don't. And then they're just people buying a normal ass house. Like sometimes an episode will just be like, I want a million dollars and I would like to buy a $225,000 house. And that's fine.

But that's not what I want to show about people buying a big fucking stupid house that's going to bankrupt them. You know, like I don't want to show about people buying a normal house. No. The picture of this host, the many pictures I'm looking at right now, I just can't fathom. He's got a lot of neck tattoos. He's got a lot of neck tattoos. Yeah, a lot of tats. He's like a, uh, Jackie, help me.

He's like a very, he's, he's, he's like, he's gay. He's very, uh, like, fun. But he's like, he's fun like he has a gun to his back. Like, he's like, he really has like a kind of chaotic, frantic fun energy that's like, he'll kind of like, like make a joke to the couple and then just like, ah, like laugh in their face until they finally relent. Yes, it's like Ed Norton got canceled and became a lot lizard, and someone found him and gave him a show on HGTV.

Oh my God. You know, it's just like, man, I, you can see, he's got frenetic energy in his eyes. And not to put this on someone, but I do kind of worry about whatever he puts either up his nose or in his veins. And I only mention that he's gay Because I think that it is part of He, he, he, it's, he, that's part of his like, TV personality in a way that he goes like,

He'll go to, like, the husbands and he'll be like, Oh, you're cute. Like, and they'll be like, uh-huh. Like, it's just like, it's like the, it's like, aggressive. The intention of like queer eye and being like, oh, like, uh, these hosts are gay and maybe like old queer eye, not new queer eye.

And people might be uncomfortable. with that. It's like, it's like that. It's like an old man in St. Louis who won, you know, $700,000 on a scratch-off. And then this guy who's just like, again, just can't emphasize enough how desperate

the energy is. And he just like kind of is like trying to be like so fun. And it's like so, so intense. It's so exhausting to watch. And now they're doing fucking Zoom episodes of it. I wish everyone can see the look on Molly's face whenever

every time she laughs like the host laughs, because it is, you can see all the veins in his neck explode because he's just so aggressively having. Yes, he's too fun. He's having so much fun. And, and, and, but it's a, I love, I love the show. And I turned on that fucking show on a Friday night recently, and it was a Zoom episode and I was like,

I'll die before I watch a Zoom episode of this. How do you even do it? The whole point. And the other thing is that he's so not even a real estate agent. He just goes, he's like, okay, so tell me what you want. And then they tell him and he's like, okay, got it. And then he goes to like an actual real estate agent's office. And he's like, okay, so this is what they want.

And then the actual real estate agent is like, all right, here you go. Do the job. And then he shows them and he's like, okay, so tell me what else you might want. But meanwhile, he just has like three pieces of paper with different listings on it that they have given to him, the actual real estate agent. So he's just like an admittedly like handsome, extremely tatted, like perhaps very high on cocaine, like actor who's just kind of like frantically driving around showing people houses, pretending like he's listening to them. He's also a reality star. I need to look it up, my lottery dream. He was on, I think he was on the real world.

Really? Oh, he comes from somewhere. That makes sense because he has. Yes, he comes from another reality show. Okay, because he has some real like aspirational vibes that are. failing, you know? Yes. Yes.

That is a way to say it. He's like a guy who spent his whole life having people be like, you should be on television. Yes. He was on HEDV's design star. There was no. Oh, brother versus brother. He's been on a bunch of reality stuff. He tried to be a Disney animator.

Brother versus brother is a property brother's spin off. so don't get it twisted. Oh, God. Oh, so he was just on brother versus brother. Man, how many shows do property brothers have? So many. At least four. Jesus.

But talk about other reality shows. I know you guys don't partake in Vanderpump rules, but I must scream. What is this shit, man? I must scream about how happy I am. Get rid of them. I don't know why I've watched. I think of art six. seasons of Vanderpump Rules. It's been on since 2013. I hate watch it. It's why I don't talk about it.

Holden, we talk about how we watch television, and I don't even talk to you about how I watch Vanderpump Rules. It is strictly what I watch when I'm feeling bad about myself, and I want to watch it just be like, yeah, well, her skirt doesn't look that good. It's like that good. They are beautiful people. And I was saying this before. I hate these kinds of Uber produced all beautiful people. It's like the hills or whatever where it's like so it's like the farthest you get into

I feel scripted reality. It is the most scripted of the reality. And what are they doing in this restaurant? Because you work at the restaurant you would get dirty. So I don't understand what all these beautiful riches are doing at this restaurant. So please explain Jackie. This is, it was for a long time.

The It restaurant is owned by Lisa Vanderpump. And so she is this hot older rich woman that owns this restaurant and all of these hot people work at the restaurant and it's about their ins and outs, right? That's all I'm going to say. It is just

them being hot and them bringing out drinks and them like fucking each other and God I'm sorry about and they're always throwing things at each other and they're always screaming at each other and the most insufferable of them and I'm sorry I've tried to be more positive but I'm feeling a little bitchy today like to sit at the top of it

I'll be the lover. Yeah. Be it. All right. And I follow all of them, too. I am part of the problem. I hate watching. I shouldn't even give them the views.

You know, like, I don't even know how that works. And I wish I did it. Could you imagine the fact that an eight-year-old girl is listening to this right now and she's going to start watching the show because of you, you fucking influencer? Don't do it. There's so many other shows that you could watch and spend your time with. I mean, we'd love 90-day fiancé.

But Stasi and Kristen, who are just, and I just, I just, I, Like Stasi does like one woman shows. She's sold multiple books. Like it is ridiculous. And I'm sure I get like she, they're just, they're garbage people that think they can get away with anything. And I am happy that they are finally not only being taken down, but they got fired from the fucking show because of this one action, which I can guarantee you. That this is not the only time that they have been racist and have. gotten caught for it. But it is the first time that they are being ripped to shreds for it

because someone that was on the show, who is a black woman, was on the show for, I think, one or two seasons. And they were mad at her because interpersonal drama, interpersonal drama, long story short, they called the police on her multiple times because they decided that they pinned her for this wanted thief that was definitely not this woman, just another black woman, and they called the police multiple times against her for her to be investigated, for her to be gone after just because she fucked someone that they didn't want her to fuck. Holy shit. And they're like, and so then Stasi and Kristen both come out and they're like, we are so

sorry for what we may have done in my house. like that obviously they didn't even write. There was no fucking actual feelings behind it. Right. You pieces of garbage. And also, bitch, this was like two years ago. Fuck you. And I just, I, and this is the problem that is right now.

And I don't usually, I don't fall into. You're following them a lot right now. You're like really. Getting into like cancel culture. Yeah. But cancel them. Get rid of them. They are the scourge of the earth.

I mean, aren't pretty much all these people in a way? I mean, you know, And yes, you... It's the being mean. It's the being mean. It is that. It is using your influence in that kind of way. Where, honestly, a lot of them,

they're just people. It's like you're already beautiful. You're already everything handed to you. You're already on a successful reality TV show probably have tons of fucking money. Yes. And you're probably getting a bunch of free stuff all the time. Like, you have everything handed to you.

And you're still going to pull this and be ridiculous. And then we were already screaming about it. I wasn't even going to bring up J.K. Rowling, but it's just like at a time, like right now, shut the fuck up. All you. Shut the fuck up. It's so mad. It's so funny.

I didn't, I just hadn't had time to look at the Stasi and Kristen thing, and I was like, oh, they probably did some bitchy thing, and I didn't expect it to be racism. But, but of course. So racist. But of course, like, but it's like you were saying, holden, like, aren't they all terrible? And I feel like this is, yeah, like, what an interesting time to make connections between, like, Oh, all these fucking rich-ass people who have too much power also racist. You know, like, it's just such a, like, it's just so, like, on this show, we never talk about politics because we, like, made a, you know, we're like, oh, you know, this is like a fun space.

Try to keep it positive. But also, like, these things can't totally be separated, right? Like, it's just so funny to be like this Dazian, Kristen, bitches, racist bitches. Even in the most vapid reality space, you still have stuff like this that you have. to address, which is insane. It's like, go be a vapid reality star that is disconnected to actual reality. That's the way he's right about these reality stars. Because I have nothing against vapid reality stars. Go be you. That's the thing. You do you. You live in your little bubble. Let's say it's not for the best, but I guess that's fine. But don't be evil. Don't be racist. Yeah. Like

be a terrible. Don't be racist. Be a terrible reality star. Don't be racist. Same with fucking J.K. Rowling, you are an influence, you are an inspiration to so, and like, with all the shit that she has said over the years. I was saying earlier, I just think that at the end of the day, and I really do, I do feel this is true. Well, no, I wasn't even going to say it. I think that you have a responsibility when you become the face of a beloved children's franchise, and you need to treat that responsibility very seriously. Don't worry, Holden. She wrote all those anti-trans tweets over the weekend. And then today released a full anti-trans people essay about how she did.

This is the thing. This is not a gaffe for her. This is not an accident. This is like a hobby horse. She feels like she needs to ride. She hates trans people. And it's, it's, it's, this is not, yeah, like sometimes. And I feel like this is the thing about like the idea of canceled culture is like, oh, what,

what if I make a mistake and then everyone cancels me? But most of the time, it's not just somebody goofs and then apologizes, right? It's somebody who's like fucking digging and digging and did. And J.K. Rowling is just like, oh, I think that there's one definition of a woman. And she just does this shit all the fucking time. And like, and my, my, my, my friends, six-year-old, the flower kid at my wedding, she made, she likes to make posters. and she made a poster that said,

read the books, love them, just don't listen to J.K. Rowling. And I love that because about, like, I feel like there is this idea with cancel culture too that's like, oh, well, can we not love Harry Potter now? And I feel like the six-year-old gets it. It's like, no, you can totally love Harry Potter.

The books are great. Like, don't have to cancel the books, but don't listen to what she says about trans people. And I feel like that's just like this, I don't know what her deal. is just get leave people alone do you really need to wait in on this right now i don't know mollie as a as a person that bleeds i guess we can listen to what you have to say it's like that guy it's like oh oh you just you garbage you're garbage she's so what happened if you didn't catch it was

that that there was a headline in the interest of being inclusive that said uh you know something something I don't even know what the fucking story was about, but for people who menstruate, because people of all genders menstruate. And she was like, oh, what's the word for people who menstruate? Wamud? Wabababoo. And it was like a fucking annoying Harry Potter

of huggle muffed shit. And I haven't read Harry Potter, and I hate to shit. I'm not trying to bring my annoyance at J.K. Rowling into that language. But that she did it in this whoof-poof-poof-ful language made me extra mad. Yes, of trying to be like tap dancing. on the subject where it's just, you're not, I just, I'm beside myself. Yeah.

I apologize. Nobody needs this. That's the fact that there's not going to be any more sex and movies anymore. I don't know what to think about. Sorry, I've been yelling in the streets. Can you guys tell? Can you tell? In addition to the fact that there might not be sex in movies, there was also a guidance put out by, I think it was NYC, local government.

a new guidance about sex, which the first one was really great because it was like really detailed. It was like sex about sex during COVID and it was like avoid rim jobs. It was like so detailed. Yeah, because it was all about that it could be, they thought originally that it could be transferred through feces. Right. Right.

So it makes sense, but it is kind of fun. Dude, if I cannot give and receive a rim job for the next year, I'm going to set fire to some sort of guy. government building. It was like, it is unbelievable. I will freak out. I will become, I will become a werewolf if I cannot accept or deliver a rim job, much like one would deliver a domino's pizza. Yeah, man. I have got to be able to do it. It's like when I get to the, it's like I get in there like the peanut butter, you know. 20 minutes or less or you get your money back. Okay. I need to give that thing. The New York City government is shitting a lot of beds right now. Um, but.

Literally. He's rib jobs. But they did a really... That shit belongs in people's mouths, Molly. And New York State, you need to let us put that poopy. Give us that shit back. On my lips, on my teeth, and at the tip of my tongue. I'm gonna, probably start some sort of a weird militia and start just overrunning bizarre state houses.

No, the dog. In addition to the weird. weirdly good, the only thing that the New York City government got right in March, which was saying this really good, inclusive sex guidance that was like, if you're a sex worker, here are some other ways you can make money. And also be careful about rim jobs. They have now given an updated one that's like, if you're going to fuck, try to get creative with positions like having a wall between you so that you can get your genitals together without getting your mouths together. A glory hole rather. Give me one of those shows.

I tried it once and it is fun. I can see how it's fun. But that's also, they're going to do the same. New York City government is coming for our films, right? Because basically they're going to try to not have people smooch in films anymore because of coronavirus. Is that right? And it will be a CGI. No movie sex scenes.

They're saying that they're going to be replaced with CGI. I'm not, you know, of course, anything to keep people safe. You know that. I just think it's very funny of just like in the middle of watching. something that you're really getting into. Especially like I just fit, you know, I finished normal people not that long ago and just imagining them

cutting to like an animated of like, be pop, be to pooh, bo, bo, be pop, they just overlay everything. It's like, if you're going to do it, but if you're going to do it, like if you're going to do if you're going to do CGI, let's get weird

with it. I think that that would be a lot more fun. We would get, we would give a lot more jobs to other animators. I think that this is a great fun job. Don't just don't just CGI it. Let's have fun with it. And I'm saying this as someone that loves to watch sex

scenes. But I am nervous about that, but I'm excited to hopefully people will create a new fun way for us to be able to watch sex scenes and down with Stasi,

but also up with Vanessa Morgan. And we talked about this last week. We were yelling about Tony from Riverdale, calling out the EP, calling out everybody from Riverdale and talking about her place in the show.

And they listened. And in fact, they not only listened, they talked with her, but they also put out a public announcement saying, we hear Vanessa, we love Vanessa, she's right, we're sorry, and we make the same promise to you that we did to her. We will do better to honor her and the

character she plays, as well as all of our actors and characters of color. Change is happening and will continue to happen. Riverdale will get bigger, not smaller. Riverdale would be part of the movement, not outside it. All of the Riverdale writers made a donation to Black Lives Matter LA,

but we know where the work must happen for us in the writer's room. You know what? Hazaar, Riverdale. But also, that's not the only work that needs to be done in the writer's room. No, there's always. Sometimes change, sometimes change shouldn't happen, and that hashtag five year time jump.

Yeah, this is a... Hold it, McDeely, you never bring it up. Got right down in bitch mode. In the article, it even mentions the five-year time jump, and honestly, it is weirdly a good thing in that this diversity can happen very quickly, very strongly, because of the five-year time jump. That is all...

It's so funny to be like, okay, we've been a pretty bad and declining show for like a couple of years. Whoops, now there's a pandemic. We had to stop our show in the middle of the season on a super weird episode to end with. Okay, also now there's like a very important movement for racial justice.

We can't ignore. All right, we're going to change. Also, we had just announced this five-year time drum. So, all right, we're going to... Now's the time. Making some changes. Unbelievable. Oh, it's definitely them backtrack, backtrack, backtrack, backtrack, backtrack.

But at least they said something. Terrific. At least they apologized. It's just putting like a nice... It's putting like an important. coat on like a sinking body, you know, like that show is just like the writer's room. I don't know where they've been for a long time in terms of just continuity of, you know. You know what, Molly, maybe this is what we need.

You know what? Maybe we need to change our perspective on the time jump. Maybe this is what we need. Time jump into a racially just future. All right, guys. Maybe. Hold it. Do you have a conspiracy? Maybe Steve Jobs is still alive?

Whoa. Okay. Which one is Steve Jobs? Steve Jobs. I thought you requested this one last week, Jack. I did? I think he did. Maybe I'm wrong.

Steve Jobs is possibly still alive because a man took a picture of a man in Egypt. Is it because he had a turtleneck on? No, but he didn't have shoes on. And that is a big part of it. If you want to look it up, I don't have it up on my screen share, but just Steve Jobs still alive, look up the picture. Let's take it back to the beginning. Steve Jobs tragically dies at the age of 56,

eight years after being diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. But, however, in August of 2019, a photo was shared. At first it seems on Facebook by a username Ahmed Bassiuni, which set the internet aflame. And the conspiracy really picked up steam when it was posted on Reddit with the caption, Steve Jobs is hiding in Egypt after faking his death. The picture is of a man in Egypt sitting in a chair barefoot

that looks a ton like Steve Jobs. It's right, uncanny, right? Yeah. Does it actually look like him, Molly? He looks like a guy who has kind of salt and pepper hair that's short and a little balding, a gray beard and glasses. You know, he doesn't not look like Steve Jabs, but I think that what really this shows is that Steve Jabs is a fairly generic looking man.

Interesting. One Twitter user captioned the photo, Steve, no job. Right? Because he doesn't have one there. And another user claims that the fat guy next to him is Elvis. In all caps, they wrote that. So who knows? Maybe there's some sort of cabal of fake dead.

celebs in Egypt. I am looking at the picture right now as well. That is not Steve Jobs. I'm going to say the evidence against that being Steve Jobs is mostly centered around the fact that he, that man and that photo wears no

Apple Watch. And everybody knows that everybody knows. Everybody knows. That the real Steve Jobs would don that important piece of technology in order to live his day to day. You're right. Especially his fake dead day to day.

Right? And the proof four is that Jobs' father is an immigrant from Syria, which is adjacent to Egypt, which is a fact that I learned by looking at a map. Whoa. I looked at a map. And I learned where those places are located. Also, Jobs has spoken towards the love for Egypt

and the simple living found therein. I think that I would say that if Steve, Jobs is alive somewhere, wouldn't that make a lot of sense? Wouldn't you want just some time off? I'm assuming what he's, he's probably what, a billionaire? Exhausted. He'll take some time off. Yeah, I had this weird thought the other day. I was like, you know, I feel like it maybe shouldn't be illegal to fake your own death. And I get why it should be. But part of me is like, just let people start anew. You know what I mean? Just fool everyone around

them, fool the greater public, pretend to be dead. If you can get away with it, you should be, You shouldn't have to be, you know, scared for the rest of your life of being arrested or whatever, I think. I think that, you know what? Weirdly enough, hold it, and I very rarely say this, I agree with you. Wow. I think that this is, I think it would be fun. Just as a way, in the same way, yes, I'm bringing up lobotomies again. Sure.

In the same way that, you know, sometimes don't you kind of wish that you could just take it all so that you can see everything and like your hallucinations become a part of your day to day? 100% And you know, it just doesn't bother you anymore I fantasize about it sometimes I think about it Absolutely Would love it I think about it

And you're just like You're still doing it I want to consent I like my opinion As a part of it But you know man Right through the eyeball It's a trip to paradise

A temporary lobotomy Would be a kind of ideal You know Because I don't know if I want I think that's called Xanax I'm fairly sure That is what Xanax is for Not that I would know, Mom.

This conspiracy theory has just taught me that the power of personal branding, because what I've realized is Steve Jobs is a completely unmemorable man without that silly, silly turtleneck. I thought, also, sorry, I was also taking it back because it says on this one, the photo was first posted on Reddit by you slash she, she, she squirty. And for half a second, I was like, is that my Reddit username? And no, it's not. But it does make a lot of sense for me. So my question is, do you believe it?

Is Steve Jobs still alive, Jackie? I hope so. Okay. But you hope so, but it's not that guy? I don't think it's him because I think it's definitely not this guy. But I really hope that he is somewhere in some sort of amazing Miles Big underground bunker that has fake sunlight where he also has. like an indoor track that technically he's outside but also he's inside where he could never

be found. I know nothing about technology, but I assume a man that's smart or that gifted, I imagine he's pretty smart, would be able to have some sort of huge underground layer that he could retreat to so that he wouldn't have to talk to anybody anymore. There you go. My answer is that we don't need any one Steve Jobs because this proves there are many Steve Jobses. Wow. Ah, parallel universes. That's fun. Holden, what do you think?

Yeah, absolutely not, but I kind of like this new alternate universe theory. I think that that picture, that man is Steve Jobs, but as Steve Jobs from a different realm that fell into Earth Realm by accidentally opening up a portal. Oh, portal lines. Totally something he would do. He's an engineer. Right? I think he flew too close to the sun. his other realm and was like

at eye portal, it's gonna be great. We're gonna open up portals or you can go to other realms. And in testing it out, he ended up in this reality. Good for him. Good for him. And there it is.

My pretty conspere! I'm a bat! Human form. Oh, what we do in the shadows, you're all I live for. No, that is what. I take back what I said about Chitz Creek. We still have what we do in the shadows.

At least, thank God we still have what we do in the shadows. Indeed. But right now it's time for the little. Who's on the list? Jackie, got to have that list. Well, I was going to do the list where people that have actual sex on screen during movies, but I'm going to come back to that after I watch Love by Gasparneau, because that is definitely one of the movies where people have actual sex on screen.

So today we are going to be going with 17 very famous celebs. You forgot. were in very random music videos. And thank you to the amazing person on Instagram that sent me this list. Because I did forget that Keanu Reeves was in rush, rush by Paula Abdul. Also, y'all, take a second to check out the teaser trailer of the new Bill and Ted that comes out later on this year, which I am very excited about.

And it shows how much I love Keanu Reeves because Keanu Reeves just essentially pulled strings and did it because Alex Winters really wanted to do it and because he's a good friend. But also, he was in rush, rush by Paula Abdul. Fun fact. When Paula went to introduce herself to Kianu on the set of the video, she found that his trailer door was slightly open.

Upon peeking inside, she discovered that Keanu was doing maybe the most early 90s Kianu thing of all time, playing air guitar in his underwear. Also, despite years of rumors, Paula confirmed that the two never dated But, all right, you look in. You see Keanu Reeves in his underwear, do an air guitar.

You at least join him and take off your clothes, right? And have sex. Yes, what they did. Obviously. I hope they did. What about Angelina Jolene rock and roll dreams come through? Never heard of her. Meatloaf.

Never heard of him. Angelina actually started her career in music videos. And Michael Bay, yes, that Michael Bay, directed this music video and a couple of Others for Meatloaf, including I'd do anything for love, but I won't do that, which also is an amazing fucking video. It is. And objects in the rearview mirror may appear closer than they are before he began directing feature films. And I love in this BuzzVeed article, it says also this song still slaps. It does, if I am young enough to say that it slaps.

I love it. I also didn't know in this little list that Hayden Panetteer, which I didn't know, made music for a while. I know that she's in. I'm sitting here staring at this headline like, Sebastian's Dan and wake up called by Hayden Pantheir, and I was like, wait a minute. What, the order is wrong? Hayden Pantera is an actor.

Nope, not this time. Apparently Sebastian Stan was in the music video. I looked it up, you know, it's generic her music and stuff. I can see why it never took off. Essentially, I feel like 2008 was such a weird. Maybe it's just because I was, you know. I thought wasn't she a Disney girl, though? I feel like a lot of times those Disney.

kids, because what they do on Disney shows involves a lot of singing. So naturally they always end up doing a bit of both when they move on to the next stage. They always put an album out and try to get, you know, acting work. Fair. But what about Wesley Snipes in Bad by Michael Jackson? I love this music video, but I never realize that that was Wesley Snipes. Yeah, this is a fun one. It's a deeply 1987 fact.

Yes. Also, recently rewatched Demolition Man, do yourself a favor and rewatch Demolition Man. So fucking good. Also, though, rewatch it, because Jeff gave me a fun fact, that apparently word on the street is that it may have been originally written that Sandra Bullock was actually supposed to be Sylvester Stallone's daughter in the movie. And if you watch it again now, it actually makes much. sense that she's his daughter and not his love interest. Anyway, we got Jennifer Lopez in a Janet Jackson music video. That's the way love goes.

I dare you, you never whatever. You never would ever Jennifer Lopez in my presence. That's true. We have Josh Holloway in Crying by Aerosmith. I remember that one. Ugh, Kim Kardashian. Charlie's their own in Crossfire by Brandon Flowers. I will say,

Kim Kardashian was in a Fallout Boy music video was actually one of the more surprising ones on this list. Yeah, that was an actual fun one. Also, Jeremy Renner, sorry to jump ahead, but Jeremy Renner in trouble by Pink. This is a hard list not to read it. It's an exciting list where I think, Molly and I are both, I think, jumping ahead

because it's a very fun, this is a very fun list. It's a good list. It's a great list. I mean, of course, that precedes Jeremy Renner's, you know, amazing. music himself that he's been releasing lately. That is a choice that he has made. I definitely remember Juliette Lewis and come to my window by Melissa Athrich.

Oh my God, this episode's all kinds of Melissa Athrich. Wow. Whatever, not whatever. Finally, Chris Evans in tainted love by Marilyn Manson. That was around the time that Chris Evans was only jock-dict. dude number nine. And I love the fun fact. And this is, okay, so this one might be cheating a little bit since the music video was

for the film, not another teen movie, which Chris Evans was his first feature film. But it is still pretty jarring to see Marilyn Manson push Captain America. And you know what? They right. It's fun. Yeah, that was a good one. It's fun. You got listed. That was a good list.

But what's not fun is my bizarre situation over here, where I just, I'm starting to, like, not see things. Oh, no. What are you talking about? I don't really know what. Yeah, I don't know what the deal is. Weird. Um, I think I'm going.

Blind! Item! Or maybe you can. You'll be the judge. I have one very on-topic blind item that, from the many screechings that, uh, Jackie has had earlier. I, I'll get to that one in a second. First, I'll start with this one, and then I'll end on a lighter one.

Oh, okay. This new relationship the rapper slash mogul slash frequent name changer has will not last. They always leave once they discover his fetishes. I'm sorry, what is this person again? The new relationship, the rapper slash mogul slash frequent name changer has will not last. I will say the rapping part, not really a thing anymore. A bit of a thing back in the day for this. Yes.

or actually Sean P. Diddy Combs, please, Molly. And what is? He has recently been photographed with an alleged new girlfriend described as a Latina bikini model in quarantine together poolside at Diddy's Miami Mansion. What are his fetishes? That's my question to you. What do you think the fetishes are?

I'm thinking diaper play. I think he shits in a diaper while he, you know, sort of enjoys sexual experiences. I mean, who knows, I could see that. You know, maybe it's just that he's into a lack of control, and especially since he is a mogul for so many different things. I could definitely see that that would be something that he's into. But also, I really love it.

You know what? Maybe he watched B-Stars. Maybe, maybe he's a furry. Maybe he got, maybe he was, maybe he's into furry business. I mean, we all saw the quivering wolf and knew that he needed to be kissed. Here's what I think. I think he gets tagged. he needs to get pegged while wearing a little sailor suit

and licking a big lollipop and singing On the good chip, Rolipop. That's what I'm going with. Molly, what do you think? No shame here, by the way, it's all fine. No, I think I vote with Holden. Okay, there you go.

Good ship lollipop? Yeah, scat and child play stuff. Yeah, for sure. No, I just hope that he, or fuse the two and like I just said, I don't think either one of you guys watch BoJack Horseman, but he dresses up like when BoJack is a child and he's always in a little sailor suit while he's being abused by his parents. And I think that that's, so maybe he also has the horse mask on as well. There you go.

There you go. All right, moving right along. You guys are killing it. Here's the one that's on topic today. Speaking of publicists, the one for this Beelist actress wrote an apology for the actress without actually saying sorry, which has only made things worse. Fire the publicist quickly or will be a long time before you work again. She's B-List. She used to be A-List because of a very popular TV show she was on.

But it's not Stasi. It's not Stasi. It's a different one. No, it's not Stasi, Jackie. I didn't even know about the Stasi thing until you told me about it. Like, the world isn't screaming about Sassie. This is one of the bigger... This is someone we talked about today?

No, but it's very similar. This is someone who also got dragged a little bit recently for things they've done in the past that were kind of, I don't know, racist a little bit maybe. Ah. But on a reality show. Not a reality show. I said a very popular TV show. Oh, who else is being, who is it in the bad girls?

Give us more hints on the television show. Uh, involves music. What? Involves. She got big called out this week. I'm kind of surprised you guys aren't jumping on this. Big call out. Oh, Leah Michelle or whatever.

Oh, yes. Liam Michelle Glee Liam Michelle did a Black Lives Matter tweet about George Floyd to which ex-co-star and ex-co-star who's oh oh fuck I didn't write down

the name of the ex-co-star either way responded with LMAO remember when you made my first television gig a living hell because I'll never forget I believe you told everyone that if you had the opportunity you would shit in my wig

amongst other traumatic microaggressions that made me question a career in Hollywood another black co-star debut Snell tweeted this after that tweet, girl, you wouldn't let me sit at the table with the other cast members because, quote,

I didn't belong there. Fuck you, Leah. Wow. I, it seems like her, honestly, it's just, I put it in the back of my head because I was like, fuck that garbage. Fuck that piece of especially, and you were completely

right with the publicist because afterwards she didn't even apologize and definitely said it more in the way of like, well, if you saw that the way you saw, oh yeah, what is... I have the whole thing. This is what she said on Instagram. One of the most important lessons of the last few weeks is that we need to take time to listen and learn about other people's perspectives in any role we have played or anything we can do to help address the injustices that they face. When I tweeted the other day, it was meant to be

a show of support for our friends and neighbors and communities of color during this difficult time, but the responses I received to what I posted have made me also post-specific focus. specifically on how my own behavior towards fellow cast members was perceived by them. While I don't remember ever making this specific statement and I have never judged others by their background or color or of their skin, that's not really the point. What matters is that I clearly acted in ways which hurt other people, whether it was my privileged position and perspective that caused me to be perceived as insensitive or inappropriate, again, perceived as sick, or inappropriate times or whether it was just my immaturity and me just

being unnecessarily difficult, I apologize from my behavior, and for any pain which I have caused. I listen to these criticisms and I am learning and while I am very sorry, I will be better in the future from this experience. Wow. Also, Samantha Ware is the person

that you're talking about. Samantha Ware who responded perceived? Perceived? Purse? Open your purse! And posted a link to a GoFundMe to raise money for James Scurlock, who was shot and killed while protesting. Wow. Perceived twice. perceived twice.

Twice. If you saw me and you thought me do that, then you saw that. And I'm learning. It's also the bullshit of people. Like, all right, you fuck up. Let's listen.

Let's have a fucking conversation. Man the fuck up. And also, don't have PR people write it. Like with Stasi and fucking Kristen, their quote-unquote apologies. We're obviously written by the same person, both the same PR company that wrote it. They're almost completely the same.

There's no honesty. Have a conversation. You having a PR person write an apology for you. Fucking apologize. That means you're not sorry. Set it to a PR person to be like, hey, is this work? Like, does this sound okay? Fine.

But you should write it your fucking self. Also say perceived twice. Say perceived twice. Perceived? Okay. So anyways, that's that blind item. I love it that I got the one that you didn't call out today, Jackie, I feel like, is the other big one. And it's fun.

You know what it is? Because I never watch Glees, so I don't give a fuck about Leah Michelle's existence. And I also, bye, go, go away. We don't want to look at you anymore. I totally believe that she sucked on set based off of the people talking about what she did. I completely believe that. Especially with people coming out. to corroborate

what Samantha Ware originally started saying, you know? And calling out a name, and especially when you're working in a toxic environment, is scary enough to do. It's a scary thing to do. But then to have people support you,

support your allegations of what you were saying and what you say happened, and then the audacity to say something like that back, to not even personally respond. It's just so funny. Like,

I feel like every, You could play a, you know, the drinking game is like, look at the, like, brands, super famous people and brand slash super famous people combined that have been called out and count how many times they say, we see you and we hear you. And like those are, like, those phrases come from like the legit need to be like, yes, I do hear what you're saying. I acknowledge. But like, instead it's just like there was a great tweet this week that was just like, the police, we see you, we hear you, we tear gas you. You know, it's just like, it's like so perfect to be like, you know, to be like, I see that you've been upset by me and I hear what you're saying. And I'm so sorry that you felt offended by the thing you're lying about that I said. You know, it's like that's a great co-optation of the idea behind the language, you know?

Right. Yes. All right, the last one to end on a lighter note. This aging permanent A plus list celebrity slash host slash author is known for growing the best weed at her farm. She gives it away for free and packages with her name on it Like she was sending over cookies That's fun Well, I want some number one

Oh, you'll definitely want someone you find out who it is Ooh, all right, give us more hints of who the person is Oh God, um, I was gonna say Homemaker But that's not exactly the right word maybe But like famous- Is it Chrissy Teigen? No, but famous for her like cooking and her Is it Fairfoot Contessa? No. God, I would love to smoke her weed.

We have definitely talked about her a lot recently. Not Martha Stewart, not Bertha Contessa. Absolutely, Martha Stewart. Oh, yay. Absolutely, Martha Stewart. Yay! She is stoned all the fucking time, dude. Though she claims she's never smoked with Snoop, we talked about this on the Martha Stewart episode,

Pop History on the page 7 feed, who does confirm this. She recently partnered with a Canadian cannabis company as an advisor, which I actually knew when we did our episode and always just kind of seems really high these days, right? I mean, am I crazy? So, yeah, this totally makes sense.

Dude, if my only job is to be a host on Chopped, you better believe I'm going to be blazed out of my mind. And also to do everything the way it is quote unquote supposed to be done, you've got to zone out and get stone to do those things. Like, if I'm going to set a proper place setting, or like cut a million little. things out or whatever, like, wrapped stuff. Yeah, little flower petals out of potatoes. I would to be fucking stoned out of my gourd while I do it. Definitely.

Hell you, good for. Where do weat at? Motha? Where do weed at? Oh my God, I can see again. And I see my friends. And it's time for page 7-2. Finally in. And I wish, though, that barefoot contessa grew her own weed, because that would also make a lot more sense of why she doesn't mind that Jeffrey goes out with his boys every weekend. She would be in my top five celebrities to do edibles with, absolutely. We would figure

it out. We would have to smoke weed with her. Someday. It will happen, Mary. Molly, it will happen. Also, Mary is listening to this as well, our wonderful producer. Mary can do it. Mary can come to. Mary used to be screaming at her about

the Rebels City of Indra. The, what I forget what it's called, the Jenner book that I'm reading about. So she's been hearing me scream about that all day. All right. I think that's it. But also, if you want to hear more of the Jenner book, guys, we're about halfway through. Go over to the page seven, Patreon.

We are clicking along and not a whole lot is happening, but man, do you want to punch both of them in the face? Patreon.com forward slash page seven podcast. You can check Jackie and I out. And Molly these days popping in quite a bit. Twitch.tv. forward slash Holden Later's Ho. We do a stream from 6 p.m. ET to 9 p.m. every Friday. It's getting crazier and crazier every single week.

The people showing up have been more and more fun every single week. It's really, really cool. Check us out. Twitch.com. Holden Later's Ho. And we do want to say thank you last week, especially. We ended up raising over $5,000 to give to the National Bail Fund project, which was fucking awesome. Thank you guys so much.

That would be a fun project. It was $5,316.90. And the post show raised over $1,000 as well. Yes. It's insane, guys. Thank you guys so much for joining us in work. We've got to work together, guys. There it is.

All right. Molly. I am MJK.L. Kat on Instagram. And if you want any other organizations to donate to, check out the National Lawyers Guild. They represent protesters who have been arrested and or hurt by police. So that's my little shout out. There you go. We love you guys so much.

Thank you again for joining us this week. Be safe out there. We see you. We hear you. We cheer guys. We perceive you. We're just like the police. And we perceive.

We perceive. Oh, I'm so angry. Good. Let's keep up the anger. Let's keep moving forward. We love you guys so much and we will talk to you next week. Bye, guys. This show is made possible by listeners like you.

Thanks to our ad sponsors, you can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.