Page 7 - More Like Practical Tragic w/ Holden McNeely

Episode Date: September 17, 2026

This week on Page 7 we're celebratin' our OWN Fleet Week with  the captain of the SS BC, Holden McNeely, AND THEY'RE SETTIN' DOCK! Celin Dion IS BACK BABY, Lady Gaga has become Mama Gaga as she's wanted to, CONGRATULATIONS! Speakin' of STEFANI GERMANOTTA, we're takin' another look at that infamous 2022 Oscars where STEFANI GERMANOTTA SABOTAGED HER! Holden brings the Stella Thefty drama to the table. What do Jillian Anderson and Jojo Siwa have in common? There's an unfortunately titled sequel to 'The Family Stone' comin' out next year. Practical Magic 2 ain't castin' any spells on reviewers, then it's ONTO THE LIST of '12 more WILD REASONS celebrities didn't get legally married'. BLINDZ, and then it's onto some JACKIE'S SNACKIES @ 1:08:23.092 with a mindblowin' MJ's Minute Munchies @ 1:15:24.741 until @ 1:25:26.266, PLUS SO MUCH MOOOOOORE!!!!Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

I guess we'll start the show then. Welcome to page seven. My name is Jackie Zabrowski. And I'm MJ. The story of the week is Lady Gaga is a lady mama. But here at page seven, when I was young, I never needed anyone. And making love was just for fun. Those days ago, I want to be a bad message.

No, it has nothing to do with Lady Gaga. It has everything to do. Trying to connect the dots there. With Stry and Dion. Of course. There's nothing to do with Gaga. I'm sorry. I'm just up in my stiff feels over here.

The woman has been thawed. She's unshackled from her stiffness. I don't see a stiff person. I see a singing person. And I want to center that more than... She's flowing. Her stiffness. She really.

Two hours and 15 minutes long. for her first show back. How many songs? How many? It was like 20. I think they said 25. 25. All of them

banger hits. Yeah, of course. It's Sleen Dion. This is the thing. You know what? Well, she covered some shaggy, I believe. I think she covered it wasn't me. Was it about her being stiff?

Yeah, yeah. She's like, I'm not stiff. Yeah. It wasn't me. It wasn't me. It wasn't me. Yeah. It wasn't me.

Yeah. I heard she covered that. Just a lot of Shaggy. All of Shaggy's hits. There was a part where she was like, I gotta give it up for your boy Shaggy. Yeah, yeah. Holden, I would love to hear another one of Shaggy's hits from.

Angel, the angel one. Thank you. My angel. My, my angel. Also, welcome to the show, Holden McNeely. Hey, it's me. Shaggy. Ah, it's me, Shaggy.

I think that's the opposite of what Shaggy wants everyone to think. I think he wants them to tink. It wasn't you, though. You said tink, and I think it's because you were starting to feel a little bit of shaggy. No, I think that I'm feeling a little bit of tinkerbell, and maybe I just want to just buzz right over there and just buzz right up into your peepy hole and wonder if I'll make my way out of your mouth. Wonderful.

Yeah, and also maybe I'm getting a little bit of shaggy with it, okay? You're not going to bring up Shaggy and pretend like we're not all thinking about Shaggy right now. And then she was like, but I know a different Shaggy, and his name Shaggy Too Doep. she launches into some insane clown posse classic bangers. She did What is a juggalo? Wow. I don't know. She did Riddlebox.

She did like half the tracks from Riddlebox. It was crazy. Did she change all the lyrics to make them about her used to having been stiff and now not being stiff anymore? Oh, everything. Yeah, yeah. What is a stiff ho? I don't know. It was amazing, man.

But then she went back into Ptois. She still wrapped all of Shaggy Tudubes. Wow. But in a patois. It was wild. Everything about this show is crazy. Celine Dion can do anything and never tell her otherwise. Also, she did that thing they love to do.

I've seen like Usher do it and Janet Jackson where she invites someone on stage for a strip tease. But instead of doing the strip tease on them, she was the chair. Whoa. Because she's so stiff. And they would sit on her. Because she's so stiff. And then someone else would come out. and kind of tantalized them.

Honestly, you know, that sounds great for her. If you're stiff, you know, be stiff. Yeah, oh, she did. She was like, look at all the things. That was the opening thing. She did, look at all the things I can be. I'm a broom. Then she would be a broom.

I'm a chair. She played, I'm a door. She played all the characters in Beauty and the Beast. That wasn't the Beast, or Gaston or Bell. But before they came alive. Yeah, obviously. Before they had sent. Oh, wait, no, they were, they were, never mind.

I fucked the Laura. They started as humans. They started as humans, yeah. Well, regardless. You really ruined that. What's something that spell was put on them to become sentient of a life? You don't even know nothing. So then she did a whole thing.

She's like, my favorite show is it's always sunny in Philadelphia. And she actually hired what's his name? I mean, you could talk about fork to where they turned the cutlery technically into sentient super spies. I was going to say she was the couch in that infamous scene. she redid that scene from it's always studied in Philadelphia where day de vito comes out of the couch she was the couch she then did the famous scene from ace ventura when nature calls she played the elephant whoa and had jim kerry himself exit her well it was a rhino i think but yeah i think that i i didn't know that she could be stretched to those limits it was a elephant i've seen that movie a million times it was an elephant go on i'm sorry i barely can even hear you hold it Now that I know that you are the captain of SS Cock. Yes, welcome Holden McNeely to the show.

I've been wanting to ask about this. There is just a note in our shared document that says, Holden is a captain of no boat except the SS Big Cock. Well, here's the deal, MJ. Something amazing happened on Jack and with the Holdies. We did a classic theme that night. We did the idea of transportation. I saw.

Classic. And I dressed as a boat captain. And I didn't realize this would happen, but every person in the chat came in just like, oh my God. That's not true. A couple people said it. Over and over again, non-stop people coming and be like, Hold in and you look.

MJ. So, for the algorithm, I'll say effable. You look so effable. Thank you. And hot and sexy and studly. But SS Bigcock, fine to say. That's good for the algorithm. Well, we're talking about chicken.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm a coward. Yeah, you love tendies. Yeah. A cowardly boat. MJ, have you ever had that situation? Maybe you change the hair or something and you walk into a space and everyone's like,

this actually, now that I talk about this, I think both of you is probably extremely foreign to both of you, but for me... Yeah, we don't understand being, like, looking good in space. Big scrutinized for your books or any guy. And, you know, what I really don't understand, the idea of kind of like changing something about your external self and then feeling more like yourself.

Like yourself and especially, and I love that Holden knows that we've all. also never been complimented. No one's ever seen us. And I hope that you guys can feel it someday and have that transformation moment that I had. Not today, though. I put on this, this, this, this boat captain's outfit and the whole world was different. People were handing me for free fruit on the street. I do feel, MJ, that I think that the main part of this, so he had the hat on, he had sunglasses on, he had a pipe on, he had the shirt on, right? Pipe. Captain's art famous for, okay. Oh, you're sucking on that pipe.

Yeah, all night. I was sucking on the pipe. Were you like the captain from Titanic or any like specific captain? Sorry, did you not hear SS Bigcock, MJ? I don't know, okay, sorry. And then I didn't say Fock for the, to help out. To help it out earlier.

Thank you. Yeah, yeah. Well, right. And SS Bigcock can actually hit an iceberg and just get stronger because it gets harder. Harder. Exactly, MJ. And so really, Holden for the first time ever

was told that he looked good. And he's still talking about it. He's still talking about it. And over. It was crazy. And he was covered in sweat. He had, you know,

honestly, MJ, I can't believe I didn't even bring up the gloves. Oh, yeah, and white gloves. He had these white gloves on.

Honestly, I think the white gloves was sold it with the arm hair. It was, again. Were you like a Victorian ghost captain? Cut,

yeah, I mean, I think I was ethereal. I think I was like, is that what we were calling him, I felt godlike. So that's what I'm going to go with.

I was some sort of like boat captain demigod or something. I just saw the Odyssey. So I feel like I was something from that almost, but out of time. Oh, sure. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. One of the creatures.

I thought I was going to have to tie all these chat people to the bow or whatever it is because I felt like the siren, you know, that they were just, they couldn't stop. So he was a captain and the siren. This is, it was a lot. It was a feel so. You're on the boat. You're on the island. I'm going to. I'm Shruder's captain.

It was crazy. And the coming that was going to... What I can only imagine, the jizzing and the bean rubbing and everything that was happening during this stream, I felt bad. I feel like we weren't getting as many... I feel like donations because everyone was so busy just manipulating themselves. They were just so, yeah, digitally manipulating. Type in the numbers and, you know...

For them to be able to donate. It was, obviously, I really think what it was, MJ, is that people usually have to stare at Holden's lizard eyes. And I think that when you don't look at them, I think the sunglasses. I think it's the gloves. I think it's the gloves. I think, you know, I, you guys know that how I love a 1940s movie. And sailors were really fuckable in the 1940s.

Oh my God. And apparently in modern day, yes. Yeah, people love Fleet Week and everything. But I have struggling to think of like a famously fuckable captain. But I'm sure they're out there. Sully. I guess Sully was the captain of an airplane. And I say captain of a transportation.

and that's one that could be captain of my heart. And if you could just let them, let them be, honestly, MJ, I think that you're thinking too small in the idea of transportation. This is why we opened it up to the idea of transportation, so it wasn't just, it wasn't just boat, all right? It was everything. My breasts had headlights.

Walking, skipping, yeah, she was a car. She was an inappropriate couple's costume, but only one half of it. MJ, did you know that they sell a couple's costume where one person is the car and the other person is the deer. Fuck in the car? Oh, a deer.

Yeah, but I'm upset. I'm upset that the deer is not dead. And so in this, their couple's costume delusion. Well, it's a deer in headlights. They're about to. I need to Google it. So they're caught in it?

Like, I feel like that should be a dead deer. So the woman is, I'm assuming the woman is the deer in this situation, and that's maybe on me. Interesting, that's on you. But the woman is frozen, right? Because my headlights were over my breasts and I was a car, titan, ass, B over here. I think it's a mental trick to try to get a woman to stand still and not talk for an entire evening. Is that?

What, as a car? No, the woman is the deer in headlights. The woman cannot. Okay, well, the images I'm looking at, I think, I'm not sure if I missed this while I was searching, but it is an excuse for the man who's the deer to just be looking at her titans all night because they're the headlights. and the deer I was like, oh, I can't stop.

Man's the deer. I can't stop looking at those headlights. Well, why can it be two men or two women or MJ to non-binary people? Take it up with patriarchy. Let's take it up with patriarchy indeed. Well, anyways, I felt seen, I guess, for the first time in a way because I know how

just big suck I can be and big lick I can be to have so many people finally catch what I've been putting down first. years now. So anyways, I'm dropping a mixed tape. It has nothing to do with this, but I'm doing that. Yeah, and I think that's good because I do, like I said, to chat over and over again, I think that people are going to be very creeped out

when they find out that you're just dressing like a boat captain and that you don't own a boat. Right. I do think that's going to really... Already two best days of my life, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, the day that you lie about having a boat and the day that you lie about having a boat. Yeah, it's just, it's always

great because the bitches always believe you. But how do we feel about Lady Mama? Oh, come on now. I did not. Come on, man. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.

I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. It's the number one topic of the day. It's nice for her. I was like looking at the articles that I was reading about her becoming a mom. And I was like, I don't know what else to say other than. Mama Gaga.

She's a mama. She wanted to be a mama. Now she's a mama. Now she's a mama. We did it. Honestly, all I can think about it, genuinely, even though I'm happy for her, I hope that she's happy, I hope the partner is happy. I think that's great. But in my brain, I'm like, yeah, of course.

If I was Lady Gaga, sure. Right. Push one out. You know what I mean? Like, do it. And why not? You can literally, if you want, you could like flip the baby and the baby would probably do flips to go to whatever nanny you have or whatever kind of staff you got going on. And I think that's awesome.

It's one of those two where she talks in interviews. She was like, next I really would love to be a mother. And, you know, that was definitely sounds like that was what she wanted her next phase of her life. So it's very nice to watch someone else just have everything work out for them. It is. Is that fucking nice? Is that nice while we sit here and struggle, MJ? Whoa.

And it's certainly because, of course, my head immediately goes to how is this going to change her life? And you're right, Jackie, probably not much. Although I also, my head went to because I feel like I have. have, I know, I have gotten so much dumber since having children. Like my brain, every ounce of creativity that was in there before got just wrung out, wrung out. Right. And so now I'm like, I'm just clawing my way back, trying to dust off the cobwebs of my brain.

And I'm like, if you have a brain like Lady Gaga, I'm not saying you shouldn't have a kid, but like, what now what is your brain going to do, you know? Because it really, it really shakes it up. And so maybe it will be a source of inspiration for her Or maybe she'll just feel 90% dumber like I do for eight years And also she has that crate, I don't know where it's at at this point in her life, but she has had all those pain issues. And that's so hard to...

She broke her back, you know? It's so hard to be... But again, it's just so different for them is every time I read these articles, I feel like it's so misleading to normal people who have kids because it's always like, it's just a dream. We're just living in a dream now. And we love this baby and it's all dream. It's just a dream.

Whereas like for me, it felt like I was in a bunker for the first like two months. And not a sex bunker like in Riverdale. No, just in a regular. The opposite. There wasn't having sex because my wife's innards were fucked up. They were mangled. But you're in a bunker.

Don't the doctors know that's what you do in a bunker? Exactly. No, she had a mangled inside. Not that I even wanted to anyways, because I can't, I'm not getting sleep. I'm not, but it's so different for them. They are in a dream because they just, I don't know what she has a robot that looks like her or what or what team she's got, but they're just doing it. And then whenever she feels like it, she's like, let me look at my baby. Yeah, just bring in the baby.

Otherwise, yeah, I imagine a robot that just goes into the middle of the night and just is like, Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I think about like a Joan Crawford back then, when she did use it or it was like, oh, let me, it's view. And it's like wanting the child to be exactly what you want the child to be. And the second they're not, it's like, take it away.

Get it away from me. I don't want it. I don't want it yelling or making sounds. It's making noises hurting my pain. My pain's return, you know what I mean? And I'm not saying that that's what Lady Gaga's going to do. I'm not, no. I'm saying that's a Joan Crawford thing.

am saying you better stick around because we've got to hear from our sponsors. Now, ever since I read, we read Liza Minnelli's memoir, which we realized at the end of the memoir, Liza Manelli's memoir is essentially an act of vengeance, a pounced Lady Gaga, because she feels that Lady Gaga wronged her at the 2022 Oscars by acting like the hero to a disoriented old lady, Liza Manelli. And Liza Minle had, in fact, been fucked by the Oscars because she needed a taller chair holding. She'll fuck by the Oscars.

Okay. Wow. All right. It wasn't on her. What did she? What happening? She led her up the stairs or something? She was brought out.

MJ, please. I'm remembering this vaguely. This is great. This is like such scandal, I think. I think it should be breaking news everywhere from Liza's memoir. So Liza likes to, you know, she has mobility issues. And this was also the same Oscars with the slap. So it got a little overshadowed.

Wow. But she likes to, Liza uses a wheelchair, but will emphatically tell you she does not need a wheelchair on stage. She needs it. And she needs a director's chair, which is tall enough for her to kind of like, sit. You need a wheelchair. You hear that old and she needs a director's chair, okay? This is a secret garden situation, it sounds like. I love that this keeps coming up.

Why? Because you're going to put her in a bath with a bunch of ice? Yeah, yeah. Remember secret garden? But anyways, yeah, I do, yeah. And she's the boy. She's the boy. Boy that doesn't actually, yeah.

Doesn't actually, yeah. So she, what she needed was a taller chair. And the Oscars apparently thought she was too much of a fall risk. They said no. Lady Gaga, according to her, citing with the Oscars saying, Liza, just do it. Just go out in the wheelchair. They force her out in the wheelchair.

She's too low to read the teleprompter. She has cards in her hand. She has 70-something. She can't read anybody who knows anybody over the age of 45. No, you're not going to read a card in front of you without your glasses. So she looks very disoriented. And Lady Gaga is like, it's okay, honey, I got you. And everyone's cheering for Gaga.

And she was pissed. Enraged. Oh, Liza was so upset to be treated like that. And she really felt that she was talking down to her and treating her like she was an older person that couldn't take care of herself. Well, she's in a wheelchair. She is an older person. But according to her, she is not at all senile and not certainly not as senile as she seemed in that clip. And so in the end of this book, again, it is just singularly about Lady Gaga.

And Jackie and I kept laughing because she just goes, Stephanie Germanata. And she was wanting to refer to Lady Gaga. And I'm not going to say that this vengeance memoir changed how I think about Lady Gaga because I still admire her very deeply. but it does make me think, instead of thinking of her as Lady Gaga, I can now only think of her as Stephanie Germanata. I mean, she was just helping her. Like, I do feel that she was just trying to help her. I totally go what lies this talking about because I know the Lady Gaga loves to be in that position.

Well, especially, you know, after Tony. Tony Bennett. Yes, after Tony Bennett. She loves to be seen as this, like, angel to the elderly talent. Yes. And then once Bradson, Adela Cooper comes along. She's like, let me kick out the chair.

You know what I mean? Right, right. It really just depends on who she's talking to. Well, yeah. So, I mean, what kind of complex do you think this child will have? I mean, what kind of mental, let's just call it a disease you think that God this child will end up with? And do you think there'll be a little northwest?

Do you think they'll be up on stage with shit all on their fucking face, saying, mumbling nonsense, a bunch of people holding phones up and being like, you go. girl. I hope that... No, I just... I do... Okay, do we hope for Gaga that she has a kid that's into musical theater or do we hope that she does it? You know what I mean? Because if there's one thing

we know about Lady Gaga, is that at NYU, she annoyed everybody because she was one of those musical theater people. She was one of the theater that was always playing piano and singing really loud. But then we've talked about this before. People that have done theater, know that the ones that are singing are the ones that are going to be singing.

Yeah. All those annoying people, there was, you know, that opera guy roommate of Lexi's that I had to deal with who was just constantly doing warm-up, vocal warm-ups and singing opera in the apartment at 9 in the morning. He has a great opera career. A great opera career. So it's worth it. Yeah.

And another girl who Lexi went to school with whose mom was like a helicopter mom, whose name starts with an H. and I'll just say it ends with an Ollie and was annoyed everybody but always got cast as the lead and everything. I think she's had a great Broadway career. She annoyed everybody at Florida State and

and Lexis's art high school. Yeah, she annoyed the shit out of everybody. Her mom recorded her first kiss because it was in a play and her mom was there to film it in high school. That's giving Jeanette McCurdy's. I'm glad my mom died. That's just one story about

about that. Here's the thing. I do think that Lady Gaga's... I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Her mom came with a little. This is before smartphones on the, it's a high school. Did she record it because she knew it was her first kiss? She came. That means she didn't just whip out a phone and be like,

oh, I should probably catch a ham corner. She brought a camera to film her daughter's first kiss because it was with a probably gay man in a play. It wasn't, she wasn't just incidentally filming the first kiss because she was filming the whole play. It was targeted first kiss. Not the way I was told the story, no. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, listen, I do think that Lady Gaga's child will be genetically predisposed to be incredibly musically talented. He had some child. However, it appears from my limited research that Lady Gaga's baby father is just some guy. Some guy. He's just some guy. Tech finance deck or something.

I mean, yeah. Some guy was so much money. AI. at all? I, y, aye, any AI? I don't know if he, I mean, if he does, I hope he doesn't do AI. He's married to one of the most creative people in pop culture.

So I just feel like it's a roll of dice. Is this baby going to be like some guy or, you know, the talent of a generation, like their mom? I always hope for the children of these people that they are just like actually pretty boring and normie and just like get into, just are really good at accounting or something. and they could just not have it because I feel like it's so...

We were just talking about Liza, you know, and I know we have a Judy Garlandy kind of... We do. Story of her mom or whatever, but I mean, come on. I mean, it just seems troubling at best. I think the only way to be a famous person's kid, especially musically,

but probably in general, is to either be an incredible talent or to be completely just some guy. And I think that if you're in the middle, like that's where you're, you get a chit. You know, it's like you, if you are like, I'm interested in this industry, but I have middling talent at best.

That's the worst case scenario. Now you're just bringing up. So, I don't know if you guys been keeping up with like the Stella thefty stuff. Stella Lefty is like the new really annoying Nepo baby. She is the daughter of like the Groupon guy, billionaire guy. And she put out this extremely saccharacter. an Iroly song called Boston. And it's just stick season.

And a bunch of tracks on her album are just other people's songs, obviously, that she just stole. Oh, I didn't realize that it was Groupon. I think it's Groupon. I could be wrong. It's one of those annoying online things. But her dad's a billionaire completely. Her whole career has just been completely created by money.

Yep. The dad is the, he is the founder and CEO of Tempice AI and the co-founder of Groupon. Oh, good. Yeah. N-A-I and it's a media ocean. Yeah, yeah.

And she just sucks and her music's just devoid of anything and I say this as a Gracie Abrams apologist but still I... We both are.

We both are. But I think that's different. And I know I'm as Swifting everything but music is... Popular music is rough right now. I don't know if you've noticed. That choosing Texas song has been number one for like months now.

Choos and Texas I'll get to... It's just the most like blanked. and just buy the numbers kind of country, shitty. That you bring this song up because I was not like hearing all of the TikTok of like of Choos in Texas. And when we were on our trip overseas, Henry just kept underneath his brother.

Why is it in his head? Is he a TikToker? No, it's because there is this creepy, bad, like person that he follows that. did a cover of it that he sent to me. And that's why he kept singing it. And then I found out that it was this like, I'm going to say kind of just mid-country song. And I was like, why was he singing it over and over?

And then I just, it's just, and then once now that he put in my brain. It's number one longer than like, it's broken records now. And it's the most. I mean, I would just, I would hear that song and be like, okay, fine. But the fact that it's like, yeah, I like the part when he says she's drinking Jack and everyone says it sounds like she's jacking off. Like, I like that part of it. It's fine.

It's not even a bad song. It's just, you're right, Holden. It's just usually... Mid is fuck. At this point. And that Boston song is so mid and stick season. And a song that already is popular. It exists.

A song that she covered multiple, multiple times on her social media before she put out Boston. So it's just, it's crazy. And there's like four or five... And there's four or five... There's a chick's song. No good. Formerly known as Dixie Chicks is a chick song that she just...

That she covers? No! Well, I think maybe she covered it in the past, but she just... Oh, but that she just... Wholesale ripped off as one of the tracks of the album. Wow. It's just the most mid-devoid, and I feel like I'm part of the problem because I've been a Swiftie and, you know, for all this time.

And I'm glad that you're finally saying it. And I think Gracie Abrams was the gateway. I feel like I feel like I'm trying to step away from Gracie Abrams because I feel like she was the gateway to Stella Fethke. How dare you? How dare you? That is not the same. We didn't talk. I don't remember if we talked about it at all, but the, the Daisy Chain Festival was cool.

I loved the Daisy Chain Festival. Everything it was about. I'm just so upset. I wanted to go so badly. I wanted one need to get old enough to take her. It looks like they'll keep doing them, which is so exciting because what a cool thing. And I've been kind of thinking about Lilith Fair recently and how like unique and cool that was.

Were you thinking about giving the gift of that to women? No, I was just watching a lot of pornography with lesbians in it. I was watching a lot of lesbian pornography and it was like, lesbians. What did lesbians do? Lesbians play music too. I was just thinking about what do

besides pornography for me? Right. They also make music. Lilith Farritt. That was so special. It's so sweet. Are you talking about Jojo Siwa because she created lesbian.

in music. That's right. I don't know if you knew that. Dude, I wish she would throw a like a Lilip Faire style music festival. I mean, I think she did on her cruise and it was just starring JoJo Cia. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, but you've been that since you've been gone, since you've been gone. We have come full circle and now I'm just a full on Jojo Ciawa fan. I like Jo Cia Cua. I think that I think that she's actually just really fun and great.

And much like Liza Minnelli has been a public laughing stock for so long that she now has become like supercharged levels of powerful where she's like, you can't make fun of me. I'm Jojo Siwa. Like try. Yeah. You know, like, oh, I can take it.

You know, I have a, I have a cruise named after myself. And so now I'm fully back around. She wears it well, you know, other people wear it very poorly. What the warrior of her? You like of just severe existence? Just, she just, she rolls with it in a way that other people. people try to fight it, you know, like the Cory Feldman's of the world, like really try and

fight it. It's like, no, bro, you got to understand what you are. Just live it. I think she knows what she is a bit. And I think she's going to keep, she's going to like Liza Minola, she's going to know better and better as she gets older who she is. Honestly, you should have, MJ and I were watching Nation's Dumbest,

and so JoJo Sewa was on Nation's dumbest. And it really is, the problem is, is that like you said, because she leans in and because she owns it, it just makes her more charming. Yeah. And it's just,

and she's not trying to pretend, like, even with the whole, like, I made queer music, quote unquote, she knows she did. Like,

I feel like there's, she's a child. Like, you know, you didn't do that. But, you know, sometimes they're just, she's just fireballing out

into the wind. I feel like she has stood on business, at least, with the LGBTQ stuff. And, like, she's not just like using it. No, very much so.

She's, you know, really like kind of staying on it with the LGBT. Let's see what, we'll see what happens. I know she's been with a filthy man or whatever. She's giving pansexual visibility just like Jillian Anderson. Oh my God. Which is my joke right now is Jackie smokes so much weed.

She's a pot sexual. Come on everybody. Come on, I just took a tea break, all right? It's different now than it used to be. That's good. I'm more sensitive than I used to be, but Jillian Anderson does come out as pansexual while detailing her past relationships with women. Now, of course, we don't need this, but do we like it?

Yeah. I feel like I always knew she was pansexual or, I don't know why. I think we just decided. It's all assumed that she was pansexual. She did apparently say as early as 2012, which was a time that I think it would have been seen as fine, that she dated women when she was younger. But I think this is the first time where she was like, this is like my identity.

And I didn't know how to reckon. Because like, I think in the past she was like, oh yeah, I dated women and then I've like been with men ever since. And she said that thanks to sex education, the show she was in, which is a fantastic show. And maybe teenage sex and death at camp my asthma. Maybe that all.

She's like, it really helped me like embrace sex positivity and like discover like embracing the sexual parts of myself. So it sounds like she's really, she's 58. She's been on a journey. and I was really trying I was really trying to figure out how to make the joke

that she's like she's like the pansexual of accents as well you know since she can go both English and you know American she wants to real hilaria yeah yeah yeah I really I really liked sex education and it was one of those shows that I ended up falling off of just because I wanted more I wanted it to just be about Julian Anderson I just rather than it be about the young people. I didn't want the young people. I wanted it. I was like,

more Chile. I just watched Julian Anderson. I understand that's not what, that's not the story of it. So I do need to go back to it. But I mean, not to scream about teenage sex and death at camp my asthma again. But boing, boing, boing, boing. I watch that again anytime. Nice. Yeah. I haven't seen it yet. Have you seen Coyote versus Acme? We were talking about it last week. I haven't seen it yet. I felt like I needed to see it in the theater. It's been such a nerd-of-mouth story for so long.

We picked up on that, maybe page seven as well. We picked up on it really early and was like, why isn't this movie coming out really championed it? So I felt, and I saw it, I think one of the first showings on opening day, luckily it was also during our network break, so that made that possible. But yeah, I wanted to make sure to be there day one to support that movie actually being in the theater.

And it was cool. There was a bunch of people in the theater. A lot of laughs. and it was that movie that I thought it was going to be where it was like, I can't believe you guys were going to try and not put this out. How dare they? That's crazy.

Cried multiple times. I can't wait to see it again. I just, I really, and we talked about this last time, but it really, I feel like they elevated the Looney Tunes in a way that gave respect to the Looney Tunes. Oh, yeah. And I have to recommend to... Not that I need an elevation.

I just meant like made it more adult. Yeah, and I recommend also the day the Earth blew up. It was a Looney Tunes movie that came out with Daffy and Pee and Pee. Porky, a pig, it got no promotion. You were saying what he was. It was like, Porky. It feels too weird to say poor. Porky.

But yeah, it came out. Yeah, if you're calling me Porky, yeah, I don't, I don't appreciate that. Look at this Porky girl over here. Oh, me, hold it. It came out and like nobody gave it much publicity, and so kind of on purpose, and they tried to just kind of,

shovel it off and it's awesome. It's a really good movie and it's a straight up Luny Toon's movie. Back to you, you fucking hog. Oh, well, when the hogs are out, well, you better get the bogs out because I'm looking to get muddy from my back to my front. I guess that was my hoop. Oh.

If we're talking about movies that are getting a lot of publicity, can we talk about what is our plan for the three of us to be able to see the Family Stone sequel together in person. Because MJ, why would you watch that with Holden ever? First of all, I saw Family Stone in the movie theater and loved it. Thank you very much.

Second of all, I hate the title of this sequel. I feel like it's another like 30 rock title. There's no way to say it either annoyingly or in a way that doesn't make it sound like the first movie because it is called Families Stone. So if you try to say it in a non-awkward way, you go Family Stone. Family Stone, which sounds like the movie. Family Stone. Yeah, it sounds like a movie Family Stone.

Or you have to over-enunciate the gap. Families Stone. It's such a bad name for a sequel. What is wrong with people? They should have called it Family Stone Mama's Dead. I mean, that's in common. Then we know it is the, it's the second one. That's the first one though.

That's the thing because I was like, well, she. I also, eventually. I loved in the article, it was like, sadly, Diane Keaton, won't be in the film. She passed away. I'm just like, she died in the movie. Spoiler, she dies in the fucking movie. What are you talking about?

She was she going to be in the sequel? She wasn't going to be back. What was she going to be a ghost? What was she going to do? Come back. Oh, she got reincarnated as the talking dog. And then she's in as a cartoon talking dog. And her son won't even be able to hear her.

But will you be able to hear what we come back with next right after this commercial? Hi, yes. Can I have one for families? Stone? I'm sorry, what are you? Are you saying Family Stone that movie from 12 years ago? No, no, I'm sorry. There's a new one that's a sequel. Can I get one ticket, just one, just one ticket for the movie Families Stone? But you're saying the sequel, but you're just saying the movie that came out already, so I don't know, sir, sir. They could have done Family Stones,

although that sounds like balls. Family Stones would have sounds like balls. Then it's talking about balls. Why don't we just, families Stone sounds so bad to say. It hurts my mouth to say, can we please call Family Stones? I'm sorry, but it just sounds like testes. That's balls, man. That is only balls.

Like, no, no, but like, to say families stone is crazy. That's just a crazy thing. You call something. It's either sounds like the first movie if you say it too quick. Or if you say it like a complete fucking asshole, then you say it correctly. That's the only way to say it correctly.

I'm really excited. Families Stone. You mean the... What? What? Do we think it will be good? Family Stone was such a product of his time. It's so many ways down to the like, here is our disability representation.

Here is our black representation. Here is our bitch representation. You know, like it is such a like a delightfully mid-aughts, extremely try-hearted. feel good. And listen, I watch it every year. I love it. But do we think that the sequel will be fun bad or exquisitely painful bad? I mean, the cast is amazing. And my problem is that if Craig T. Nelson is there, I'm gonna be there. And so it's about to the dad bringing like a new woman having to meet this new woman that he's been fucking. Yeah, yeah. And who's, what kind of bitch is she gonna be, you know? Or will she

be dying? Does she, or will one of them? What do you think? Do you think one of them will be dying? I just, gotta be dying. One of them has to be dying, right? Yeah. Oh God, does he get another wife that's also dying? I think he's addicted to the whole like having a partner that's dying thing. No,

it'll be sad or it'll be one of the adult children who's dying. Don't MJ. Like that movie crash, but not the racism one. Oh, the one where they watch after the crashes. Yes. I only know the bad crash. The Oscar Oh, really?

There's a whole other movie Oh, there's a worst crash. It's about like people getting off to being in car crashes. Oh, yes. I've heard about this from you too. I was about to be like, you've heard about this from us. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I have. I love the existence of both crashes. You can't be around Holden for longer than at least a couple hours before he brings up crash. And also this great documentary called Zoooo. Don't do it. Don't do it. Yeah, yeah, a little bit of zoo. A little bit of crash.

You brought up Sue last time. That is the double header that we're looking for. Oh, dude, yeah, I'm doing a double feature at my place if you want to come over this weekend. I think we're saving it for the holidays. Yeah, yeah. It's called Adams' favorite day, is what we're calling it. Oh, yeah. And it's a double feature of Crash and Zoo.

And zoo. All right. Ending it out with a little dear Zachary, just a little bit sprinkled on top. Yeah, sure. Even then Oscar went in Crash. Yes. And then, oh, yeah, yeah. And they were closed again.

And that's the worst one. Yeah, yeah. No, no, no, that's it. That's the next day. We're going to do the Oscar winning crash, Green Book, and the fucking, what's what we call it? We're, Miss. Blindside.

Miss White's Xavier. Blindside. Well, she's blindside last week, too. Yeah, Blindside Green Book crash. I'm going to go. We're going to sit down. MJ. It's going to be you and me.

All these practical magic conversation. Yeah, it's just going to be the two of you guys. Yeah, I'm not. I'd like to step away from them. Jackie and Adam will be. somewhere else watching several good movies. More like practical, tragic. F off. They're not liking, it's getting, I'm going to say it,

elephant shitted on. Like an elephant took a big shit on a guy's face and he's like, I'm choking, I'm choking. That's what's happening to the- You've never seen them tighter. You could bounce a quarter off of their faces. How dare you? How dare you?

They are so tight. They are so young. I do think it is a little funny because they were like, oh, Rachel Levin Wood, you guys are. are too old to be brought back. But the other ladies, yeah, it has only been a couple of years, hasn't it? If you took a razor blade and just put

a little cut in the middle of their forehead, do you think their whole face would just slap open? Or their twin would just separate out. Yeah. It would just pop open, like a fucking booy-o-o-o-yo-o-o-o-o-i-o-h. They'd just be skinless. They just like, ah, it's me, brice.

It's a Nicole in the box, yeah. Clickety-clack. Oh, no, that's not clickety-clack. That's slicing-slic. Yeah. That's different. clag and there's a slice slice slice happen. But very traumatic

by the way, I'm making jokes because I was deeply traumatized by both of those situations. So now I have to make jokes. So everyone is wondering because we're using our

shorthand because Holden and I talk at each other for many, many hours in streaming. And that was us talking about Perez Hilton and Ariana Grande. Oh, bones and blood over there.

Plas and blood. Clack, clack is Perez Hilton live streaming his mental health crisis? No, no. Clackly clackety clack is the clacking of the bones. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's the clacking of the bones. Slicy, slice, slices.

Yeah, he's for us, Hilton. Okay, good. I was deeply traumatized by those things. So now I have to make jokes to like, have to laugh through it. Be able to just mentally survive in this climate. We have to laugh. And are we going to laugh our way through the list?

Oh, wow, already. Who is on the list? Jackie, got to have that list. A celebrity couple, well, I won't say this because it gives it away. 12 more wild reasons celebrities didn't get legally married. Because I had been looking up if Lady Gaga, because it was like, oh, did she end up marrying the person that she had the kid with? She did not, which go for her.

She doesn't eat to. She's Gaga. I would probably just because of nups. I imagine you want to get those pre-nups on there, I would assume. But he's like a tech guy, so I guess it's fine. I don't know. I don't know. Tech guys, I think, are the worst evil.

He went to Harvard. Tech guys who went to Harvard are I think some of the worst people in the world right now. Maybe he's good. Guys, will you let us know, is Lady Gaga's partner? Is he one of the good ones? Or is he a bad tech guy? Is there a good tech guy at this point? Yeah.

I don't know. I think it's all bloody, dirty money and like diaper money too. There's like poo-poo and there's pee-pee on the money too. Wow. What have they been doing with the money? Do they wipe with it because they have so much of it? They're really into kind of stinky fetishes and things like that. Yeah, and their babies. Yeah.

Well, on New Year's Day 2008, Eddie Murphy and Tracy Edmonds threw a small sunset wedding on a private island off of Bora Bora. Though their children weren't among the 25 guests, they honored them with strands of beads engraved with their names. Oh my God, it's just like being sent to Bora Bora for a trip. I hope they partied all the time, partied all the time. They did it's dead? Why are they honoring them?

I think, I'm assuming because I think they didn't want to go, and I'm assuming and or were not invited. Now, Eddie and Tracy dated for nearly two years before tying the knot, but their marriage barely lasted two weeks. And they said, after much consideration and discussion, we have jointly decided we will forego having a legal ceremony. And they're like, okay. And everyone's like, all right, fine.

We're going to remain married. then you find out that apparently that the couple allegedly broke up right before getting legally married because Eddie wanted his mother to go on the honeymoon. A friend of Tracy said that was kind of the last straw. She was happy to sign a pre-up.

She has her own money. She was very accommodating. But then it was like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Eddie became very controlling and they got into a huge fight. He started screaming at her and grabbed her. She was scared. She was even willing to change her name

to Tracy Murphy and all the wedding invites and place cards had her labeled as such. Everything was out for the wedding, but because he would not, like, he had to have his mother on the honeymoon. That's why she broke it off. I was going to say, I would take the being scared and beaten and all these things, but I draw the line in mom on the honeymoon. And I'm glad that they said in this list that it was because of the mom and the honeymoon and not because of the grabbing and the emotional abuse or anything.

But mom on the honeymoon, no. Thank you. I will say it is so out of pocket and out of line. I mean, it's like there's only, there's only few, there's very few times to where I'd be like, can't have the mom there. It's like that any kind of important anniversary that's like a couple's get away. I mean, that's it, right? It's like you're going to not have the kids at your wedding, but then you're going to have the mom on the honeymoon. Like I could understand being like, I want a kid free.

I mean, your own kids, I would hope you would want them there. But like, I want a kid free wedding so we could all party or whatever. but then I want my mom to be on the fuck vacation. Those are hard to square. And especially, like, it's not like you're trying, I don't think, to make more babies because I think that he's got a lot. Or maybe if you have so many that you can't even,

like, have them at Bora Bora. Maybe you do want to make another one that maybe looks better for Bora Bora. Maybe she was there to film it. Call back. Call back to earlier in the episode. Filming the first kiss. Filming the first kiss.

Filming the first kiss. kiss. And I don't think that that was his first kiss. Right. I would throw that out there. Now, I want to say thank you to everybody that wrote in that said, I have to watch the Let's Mary Harry Reunion. Okay. Because I did watch Let's Marry Harry, which is about Harry Jousey. Yes. Just one of those guys, there's like a small handful of people that Netflix just chose, like you were the chosen. Shows in reality TV person. Yeah, he really is the number one. Netflix was like,

we will just make you famous. It's him. There's that other one that was on like all of the shows, like Love is Blind. Well, Francesca. Yeah. The one that knows how hot she is

and it's really obnoxious. She has kids and she always needs people to know about that. Oh, that was Hoodah, but that was on Love Island. Oh, that was Jessica. Oh, Jessica on Love is blind. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they're just like,

we're just going to put you on everything. You're just going to be in everything. Everything. Yeah. This guy. Well, in case you guys were wondering, the marriage that they had on camera was not legally binding.

They said that they were going to wait until after the reunion. And thank goodness they did. Because don't worry, they've already broken up. Of course. Yes, of course they have. And apparently the production held onto the paperwork and wouldn't give it to her. And now the woman is openly saying, like, he was gaslighting me.

the second the cameras were off, he was a completely different person. He wanted to go off and do his own thing. He does not want a wife. He's not ready for a wife. And we knew that. Yeah, he knew that. The last thing I knew of him is he was trying to just, like, tell everyone, including the girl he kissed that he didn't kiss her on this, like, at this party kind of situation

when he was already shacked up with the what's her name, the chick I was just talking about. And that was the whole thing. He was literally just going like, I didn't do that. I never did that. on Neva Kistah. And the chick's like, yeah, you kissed me? You definitely did. And there's cameras everywhere, bro.

Are you crazy? And sure enough they did have footage of it and he did kiss her. It's like almost admirable when I watch Harry Jousy. I'm like, I like this, especially because in the household and there's just bitches everywhere. And they all want to kiss him. And he'll just, he'll walk out of the room and he'll kiss somebody. And then I walk downstairs and kiss somebody else somebody. And I, you know, part of me is like I, you must feel great to be this horny.

but also do you feel empty. Finally, now you understand what it was like when I was wearing that captain's costume. That's exactly what it felt like. And he felt it just for a moment. I was so lucky to not be in a room full of just like the biggest titted, you know, just in the room with me.

Yep, it was just me. For millennia. One of the biggest tinned. Just asses that just like you're like, Jesus, you know, is it a special balloon in there? Is there some kind of special balloon? You know what I mean? Yeah.

No, it was just headlights. They'd all be like, oh, let me suck. I don't even know what to suck. I guess, you know, I don't even... Too bulbous, so they can't find the top? Well, no, that they would be like, I don't even think his penis needs servicing anymore, so let me figure something else to suck.

Oh, family stones. Yeah, family stones. Can I get... My whole fit, I, every... Yeah, I'm so sick of Christmas. I hate Christmas Day. I'm sick of my family, but I dragged them all out here. could we get eight tickets to Family Stone.

Sorry, not, doesn't exist anymore. The sequel's out, you fucking idiot, but the original film came out when you were like a little boy. Is that what you want? You idiot? Is that what you're looking for? You want to bring your whole family to that?

I'm here for the sequel. The sequel being Family's Stone. I can't hear you. You big fucking idiot. I can't hear what you're saying. What are you saying? I just need a two, an hour and a half of silence. Is she dead or she not dead?

Is she dead? She's not dead. All right, fine. Just give me the, just give me the Paw Patrol movie. Oh, she's dead in both? Just give me into the Paw Patrol Dino movie. I saw the Paw Patrol Dino movie over the weekend.

I had a great time. Yeah, I, when he's still not quite there, yeah, I think I'm just going to have to make. Well, she said she would definitely go see the Bluey movie in theaters, but obviously that is a ways away. But will it be good. I know this is a nerd of mouth conversation,

but will it be good? I'm worried, but I'm excited, but I'm worried. Why are you worried? Wait, do you think long format? It might lose the cute. Jackie, I don't think you have the capacity is not apparent. I'm sorry. I know.

I know that I'm childless and I understand. That I'll never understand the magic. If you could leave the room and weep quietly in the hallway for what I've lost. Yeah. I don't, I just, I mean, I hope, I don't think there's any reason to think that it won't be good. It's by the same creator, but I. animation switch up. It's like more 3D.

It's more like kind of CG 3D, which already feels like, no, the way I love my thing is different. Right. And it's just like, it's just such a, I mean, I know that by the time the Simpsons movie had come out like the Simpsons wasn't really good anymore, but it's just such a big jump to do a movie. And I am, I've just, if they jump and miss,

because they've just, there's just not a single bad episode of Bluey. So the idea of making a movie and having it not hit really hard is very scary. No, I get it. And especially when it's like, The format's normally 10 minutes. They, of course, nailed it with one 30-minute episode.

That's the only time they ever did that. And now we're jumping to feature-length film. But I don't know. We're going to see. We're going to wait and see. Oh, we're going to wait and see. And if not, those dogs are going to be held by the throat until they turn bluey for real.

Okay. Last but not least. What if you thought you'd been married for years only to discover you never made it legal? that's what happened to Mick Jagger and Jerry Hall. They first got together by the list, just even the list of this. They first got together by having an affair with each other in 1978. At the time, he was married to Bianca Perez-Mora Masias, and Jerry was engaged.

After Bianca discovered Mick was cheating, she divorced him. Jerry called off her engagement, and she and Mick became the new it couple. In the early 80s, Jerry and Mick broke up, but they quickly got back together. They got married in Indonesia in 1990, but as the saying goes, how you get them is how you lose them. Shut up, list writer. From 1991 to 1994, Mick cheated on her with model Carla Bruni. However, he and Jerry stayed together until 1999, girl, when she found out that he was having

another affair with Luciana Jimenez and Luciana was pregnant. And it's just, I, you know, I'm not saying, I just at that point, if you're Mick Jagger, why try to get married at all? Ever. You know? Right. Like, why try? Oh, he was cheating on her with this one woman.

I'm pretty sure he was cheating on her with at least that one woman and also many more. Right? Isn't it? I think. But that's why you want to share all your stuff with, yeah. Even thinking about Gaga and that guy she's married to, like, I think that if you are heterosexual and you're both the gestational parents, like, and especially if you're each independently wealthy, I don't really know what marriage will do for you.

Like if you are, if there's any reason that you might not have legal custody of the kid, then I think marriage is really important. So I understand. So like this was big for them. Because as they were preparing to divorce, they found out that they weren't married in the first place. So it was like, they must have had enough money that it didn't really matter and that everything was fine. And she wasn't trying to like, you know,

destroy him or anything. I think she kind of understood the name of the game here by 1999, you know? Let me guess. Next on the list is it Stephen Tyler from Aerosmith because he got legal custody of that 16 year old girl. so we could have sex with her on tour. With the shark? No, that's Led Zeppelin. I'm talking about Aerosmith.

Because he got legal custody of a 15 or 60 year old so we could have sex with her on tour. But it sounds like that was a legal binding marriage. By pretending to be her father. Oh, no. Yeah, you don't know that story? That's a thing that we just is true. Right?

Yeah. Adam shaking his head. Emphatically, Adam shaking has had way too emphatically. He's really kind of into the concept. All right. Well, Jackie, I think I heard you say that was. He's going, yeah. I never seen Adam act like that before.

She's like, you've got to calm down. Yeah. We were in the middle of a show. Yeah, relax. Oh, Jack, is your list over? My list is over. That's great news for me and Adam. Because I'm going to take the spotlight off of Adam.

And I'm going to say that the spotlight is in my eyes such that I think I'm going. Blind items. Ah, they can't see them. I don't want to guess anything. I just want to. Snacks. You're going to get snacks. We're going to plow through these.

Our B minus list so you can get your little snack. I don't want you to get cranky. Needs a snack. Our B minus list actress with an A plus name recognition has a secret. Coming home from a recent overseas business trip where she made a paid appearance at an event, she flew first class. The ticket was part of her compensation, but tucked away an economy coach with a ticket she paid for was her secret boy toy. A stud less than half her age. Once the flight reached altitude,

she scurried to the back of the plane and started canoodling with the sexy guy. She's single, so why is she keeping him a secret? Well, her finances aren't in the greatest shape, and she has an older benefactor who's been helping her out. But nonetheless, she's always had a thing for pretty boys. So behind her Sugar Daddy's back, she's having some fun with the young stallion.

Gina Gershon! Oh, God. No. Oh, well, we know Cher is, you know, you know, in love, so we know it's not share. Yeah, she's openly with a young stallion. With a young boy too. Yeah.

And now, yeah. Sugar Daddy would imply at least of age or older. But wait, we're talking about the person that's in the back in economy, though. Who is that? Isn't that a young person? Yeah, that's the boy toy that she's hiding from the sugar daddy. From the sugar daddy. Okay.

I'm going to guess it again because I think it's this. I think it's Gina Gershahn. It's not. I said, no, it's not too. Okay, I just want to make sure. I just want to make sure. Okay, give us more. What's going on with this lady?

We love her. We talk about her a lot. Nicole Kahneman, but Nicole Kinneman does not hurt for money, I don't think. And she's not, I don't, I would not call. I love that you're doing the, I always removed the plus, the plus, the plus or minus from the A or B list or C list. But like the blinds give it a very specific grading score. If you noticed, MJ said B minus and A plus, right. I know. How can you be both B minus a plus at the same time?

So A plus name recognition, B minus list, I guess, in terms of like her work. Her actual career work, yeah. We have been really rooting for her to find love. She's gotten really, like, screwed over. It's not Angelina Jolie. It's not. We love her much more than Angelina Jolie. We, like, really love her.

We've been rooting for her. She got really screwed over in the 90s. In the 90s, she got, she got totally. fucked and Holden thought about her a lot in the 90s also. Oh, Carmen Electra. No. Pam Anderson. There you go.

Oh, yeah, yeah, Pamela Anderson. Nice. Not as much as Carmen Elektra. Yeah, weirdly. Yeah, Carmen Electra and Jenny McCarthy, too. I know it's controversial to say now. And the snake. Soma Hayek with the snake.

Oh, yeah, yeah. I liked that. Did I talk about that a lot? You talk about it on the live show. It's iconic. Oh, right. That's where I talked about it. Yeah, it's iconic.

Pamela Anderson has a little boy toy of adult age. I had a blank tape and I would record scenes from the bad TV show VIP that she was in. Whenever she'd be in a sexy outfit, I just like so that I could go back and manipulate the family stones. Just your balls, just twirling them around and around. At this point, we missed the showing we were trying to go to. So now I will ask you for tickets to the four p.m. I don't know what movie you are talking about your saying that movie. It doesn't exist.

It's not here. It was years ago, you idiot. Go find Claire Gaines. She's moved on. I just wanted to see it. You're never going to see it. You're never going to get it. Diet Giedin's dead, all right?

I can break it to you, baby. Spoiler later. No, I'm not going to have real life, you idiot. Claire Dane's now exclusively plays. stressed out women and thrillers, okay? And she loves it. Can I just get eight tickets to the film? Families?

MJ, what else happening in your blind items? Stone. Number two. Legislation has been offered in this north of the border country to force to make public all the redacted changes of the grip. Canada? Yeah, we have one precisely. What was that one?

I'm pretty sure it's Canada. All right, first of all, that's not a celebrity, MJ. Hey, so. It's just Canada. Yeah, that's the answer of Canada. Although, no, funny enough, the blind is written so that Canada is one of the things you're supposed to guess. Yeah, I know. That's insane. What north

of the border other country would we be choosing blind? There's no other countries north of the border. Greenland? Greenland, I guess. Like, it is north of a border somewhere. There's legislation being offered in Canada

to force to make public all the redacted pages of the grift from the games run by the cuck. The grift will be there for everyone to see. What? Okay, games room of the cuck. Who's the cuck? Who's the cuck? He's a Canadian cuck. He's not Canadian.

Not Canadian. No. It's not Eugene Levy. It's not Justin. Let's just name some Canadians. It's not John Candy. He's not Justin Bieber. It's not Ryan Reynolds.

No, he's not Canadian. He's not Canadian. He is from a, let's say he's from a country that, you know, once controlled Canada. The common, he's part of a Commonwealth country. It's got to be Russia. Not Russia. Is it Sarah Palin? Russia's moving into Canada.

Haven't you guys heard? Nope. Okay. I really thought that just the cuck would do it. So now I have to think a little bit. Who is famous? Hold it? Yeah.

He loves to have his little projects. because nobody takes him seriously and everybody calls him a cuck. So he started this little project to show he's as worthy as all the other people in his family. And apparently it's just full of fraud. Brooklyn Beckham?

King or... Prince Harry? Yes, there you go. Okay. Yeah. Wow. Kinger. What's his game?

Wait, so wait, wait, what? The Invictus Games, which is, I can't believe you don't remember we read about it in his long book. Right. He started these games. It's like, it appears to be like the Paralympics, but just Harry's version. He's like, I will do sports with disabled people, but it's me, Harry, it's my games.

It's not the Paralympics because those aren't about Harry. This is me. This is my Harry games. Which, of course, disability all about Prince Harry. I know Prince Harry is really, he's out there representing for a lot of people out there. Prince Harry loves nothing more than to choose a cause, any cause. and then be like, this is my cause. I will also say, I'm happy.

Arrested development is, I think, a disability. The show. True. The condition. Yeah. Right. Yeah. Well, so apparently he not only loves to pick a cause and make it his,

but he loves to be a little bit fraudulent in the process, which makes sense because you don't never learn how to be a person when you're a prince. So he created these games called the Invictus games. And apparently there is legislation in case. Canada, and I looked at this and I was like, is this just the blinds being dramatic? But there are allegedly financial expenditures amounting to more than $63 million for these games. And everyone in Canada is like, there's like cloaks. It's like, I need big of cloaks. Don't you understand? It's just all of his outfits for what he wears to the Invictus games.

I love a good cloak, though. Yeah. And how are you supposed to be king of game of the games? If he doesn't have a cloak. Right. I think it's also not just for disabled athletes. I think it's for disabled veterans. And so the people doing this like... Well, then I do understand. At least he has some connection to it. Sure, because he's a veteran. Okay, I take back what I said about this,

having nothing to do with him. However, the investigator in Canada, looking into this, says that approximately $117,000 were spent per participant. And this person says, would the veterans have preferred to have $170,000 themselves? versus having this prince spend this much money so that they can do like a sports festival. Another game.

Like I imagine each person would love that money would probably be life changing. Life changing if you are a disabled veteran. Yes. And so the allegation is that he is doing this big thing to make himself look very good, very charitable, spending a lot of money on the festival itself, whilst not really giving that money to the participants who would again benefit greatly from it. So that's the Canada one. But he thought about his cloaks, MJ.

Have you thought about how grand he needs to look during these events? I have a note for the games because I like this disabled veterans approach. But what if we got disabled retired veterans and we put them up against disabled retired like terrorists? And then we have Megan Markle as the referee in between and she's just like scared and like trying to make jam. So we kind of just get to see how they pair up like, okay, maybe you. stopped this terrorism attack back in the 2000s or whatever. Let's see how you guys play football together though. Oh, and see if it can bring them, like sport is the great equalizer.

Well, that's Harry would tell you that the military is the great equalizer because he's, as we remember from his book, he wrote at length about how much he was in the military, but also he was very mad because they wouldn't really let him do military things because he wanted to be out there shooting the instincts. I don't just shoot all the bad money. But think about this. He was such a target and he would make everybody else at risk. Of course. You could take, you could take, like, a disabled, retired, like, torturer at Guantanamo Bay and get one of the people they tortured or a group of people they tortured who are retired or maybe hopefully still alive.

Retired tortured person. The U.S. government are the people torturing people at Guantanamo Bay, though. The drama of that. Then the Guantanamo Bay torturee gets to, like, maybe best them at, like, football or cricket or something like that for this kind of big. Or soccer. When I look at sports, I'm looking for storylines. I'm not looking for the game.

The game is unimportant. What I want, what I'm drawn to are the storylines. If you raise the stakes, you say, hey, you tortured this guy with, like, you took his fingernails off with, like, wood pieces or waterboarded him or whatever. I think you might be thinking of wrestling. I think that you might just need to watch wrestling. No, I'm just saying. You did that back of the day. If Chris Harry directs his attention to the indefinite detention going on at Guantanamo Bay, that would be an interesting way to use his money.

You each have, you know, you each get like one year to train up in like banana ball or whatever it is, you know? Sure. Yeah, it has to be like badminton or something kind of a romp, like a long game. Could potentially, you know, and maybe the torturer has to like dehydrate themselves or something just to kind of match up better. But anyways, yeah. Yes. Okay, I'm going to move it to the next slide. Let's take it.

This one is for you, Holden. It's always fun at the end of a publicized and photograph date night when this married couple go there separate ways and the A-list athlete goes to stay at a hotel while the singer heads to her house and into her bed. How do you feel about that? I think love can exist in different ways. My brother and his ex, they slept in separate beds.

And interesting, his ex. It's very... I thought you at what point you're trying to make. It's good. It's good. we talk these things out, you know? And it works for some, you know? I was actually, I was so taken aback by how disgusted I was because I was talking to a woman

that I showed up somewhere with Henry and she asked where we lived. And I was like, oh, Henry lives that way and I live this way. And she thought that we were just an advanced couple. And then it wasn't until later on when she asked us about like, it's like, oh, like, I didn't even realize you guys were together because you're not like, it's like, oh, because like talking about how we're not openly PDA couple. And I was like, yeah, why would I be overly affectionate with my brother and the look at it? But she was like, oh, I thought you were just one of those advanced couples that don't live together.

And I was just really surprised. And I was really like, oh, very into it. But I was just so taken it back. But I was like, it's my brother. Like even though I am almost 40 years old, I was just so disgusting. Because the chemistry is just there. That's the problem. People are just begging for it.

Yeah, yeah. Well, you know what? Two words, MJ, doubt it. Three more words. You're dead to me. Is it just your dead two? Okay. Dead to me.

Yeah, dead to me. All MJ heard was you're dead too, so it doesn't matter where they're dead too. And then five more words. Two tickets to families. Stop. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

Well, I can see that I can see. Just give me a fucking popcorn and I'm going to leave, okay? I can see that the newly married couple is not only sleeping in separate beds like your brother and his ex, but sleeping in separate buildings. Like my brother and his sister. Yeah. All right. And with that, give hold it a little snack. Do you think it's a Samoye?

Do you think it's because Wendy's getting in between the two of them? Yeah, probably. I think so. And I'm talking about it. the dog. Oh, yeah. Taylor and Travis' dog. Oh, yeah.

Snacky. I've been a snacky girl. I'm snacky. I'm hump it. Snacky. Humping. Snaky. Humpin.

Sometimes you got to eat these cheeses. Oh, nice. I like cheese. Ooh. Have some kids. Are they cheese? Are they in? I'm not gonna know until I open all the eggs.

Oh, man. I hope it's just normal cheezits. Oh, I don't think so, dude. Very great. I don't think so, dude. No, no, no. Actually. That'd be amazing if you were like, yep, they're just cheeses.

Just regular cheeses. I love normal ass cheeses. I want to give a shout out out there to the extra toasty cheeses that they've been dropping down recently. I love, dude, the extra toasties are awesome. And they're starting to do extra toasties for multiple flavors. Now, this one, this is not coming in from Lenny, but I do. I did want to give a shout out to somebody that wrote in because it made me go out and look for these. Lettie did say, hey, bitches, it's probably too late.

You probably've already tried these, which we haven't. I have this box of seasonal cheesits and I can't stop thinking about them. Seasonal cheese. So I will, I'll read what else they write about it afterwards. And real quick, and Lennie and everybody else, they're too afraid to say this, but I'll say this for them. Actually send the snack next time. Thank you. No, thank you. Whoa. I didn't say it. It's ridiculous.

Nolan. He was too busy eating the cheezits and I'm proud of them as proud as everyone will be because this is for the hot dog green. See, I'm like seasonal cheeses. What could it, we're harvesting them in the fall? It's chilly cheese dog. It's chilly cheese dog. It's just this. It's a chilly cheese dog. It's this forced

city thing and it's ruining this country. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're right. And private equity. as well. I want to say, do you want the review from Lenny before you try it or do you want to try it first, Holden? What does Lenny say? Okay, Lenny says, you can taste every part of the chili dog. Can you give me a call every now and eating? Because I'm assuming this is a bird person. Oh, Lenny? Yeah. The dog, ah, the chili. The cheese. Teep, teep, teep, teep. It's not gross. It's mesmerizing. Oh, wow.

I know a meaty chip is controversial. But if you haven't tried these, please do. And if you've already tried it, I would love to hear your thoughts as hot dog ambassador. I feel like it's a new hot dog frontier. Are you happy with the birds? Sounds really happy with the birds. I'm really impressed.

It was like eight to ten different birds. Well, I was in Aristophanes, the birds when I was in college. So thank you. Yeah, I was. I do know that a chican goes. I can do lots of bird sounds. Oh. Now they do, you know, they smell season.

Okay. Now pose with this so I can take a picture of you, please. Is it a happy all? It's just the normal. You look cute. It's the usual. You look cute, Holden. He's been a snacky boy.

Snacky. He's been a snacky. How many elements of a chili cheese dog are you tasting? Count them. I want to, yeah, tell us the ways. Do you taste the dog? Do you taste the cheese? Do you take the sauce?

I mean, I'm definitely tasting the like chili spice kind of from the chili. It's very spiced. Sure. Oh, by the way, I made a lasagna for the first time with the misses yesterday. For the first time? That's right. Never done it before. There's a first time for everything.

Wow. I know I'm more shocked than anything. What did you think? it is a laborious thing. It's so laborious. And it takes time. And it is, and it was worth it.

Yeah, it was delicious. Yeah. You know, it was nice as we kind of like. It's like 100 degrees this weekend. Yeah, I know.

It's not really on season, but, not like these cheeses. Which, by the way, I'm almost like a mustard taste and it's good. Let me try these.

Yeah, I mean, you get the whole medangle. But I will say, yeah, I think what's nice is like, we're just kind of hanging out inside on a Sunday because it's so hot outside and we're exhausted.

We already did like the pool party on Saturday. Yeah. We are salty. Yeah. Very salty. Wow. But yeah, it was kind of nice to have something that we could all work on together and, you know, kind of switch off on as well. You're right, though.

It's the multi-parts. It's nice to not be alone. Like so many of the housebred women out there, you know, that just have to do all the parts themselves, you know. Housebred women. Yeah, you know what I'm happy, though, Lenny. While Lenny, you are right and you do get all the parts of the chili cheese dog, I'm kind of happy that you don't get, and I'm saying this as a hot dog ambassador, I'm happy that it's not pro dog.

Like, it's not hot dog forward. I think I get everything but the hot dog. And I think I love that. Yeah, that's what we want. I do feel that sometimes if you have something like chili cheese dog, they try to add too much of like a liquid. smoke or something in it to try to be like, but it's also the me. Yeah, and I don't like the liquid smoke thing, I think. I'm thinking I'm realizing that.

I'm just not a big liquid smoke, guys. This crushed, honestly, on top of, like, yes, on top of chili or on top of a hot dog. I was going to say on top of a hot dog. I was going to put it on top of a hot dog and you kind of get that without. Also, these crushed up, and I know that this is, like, maybe this is just a fatty girls thing to say of like, I would also crush these up and bake chicken, like, using them as like a breading for chicken. I'd even crush them up and just put them in a little pouch.

Like I had like a little pouch of sand. Dust your family stones with them. And just eat it. It's now midnight. It's now midnight. Can I get it ticket for tomorrow? Can I get it ticket for tomorrow? You know, I'm more.

These are really good. Lenny, you're right. I'm good, but not because I don't like them. It's because I finally had food before one of these. And so I'm not like dying right now. Like I used to, you know, so I don't need to eat like that. Because you can get the onion. too. You are right, Lenny. This has quite a diversity of

of taste. I don't know if I like you. I think you need to send the snack in and I think, you know, you could make some changes in your life. I just sense it. I just feel like this is your year if you want to have it be your year. And that's coming from Holden so you can take that. Right now you're not cutting the must. Whoa. We love you, Lenny, but I need you guys to kick it to me because I've got a really exciting snack today. All right. Yeah. I'm gonna hold it up to the camera.

Oh, it's a, oh, it's the sound lollipaw. Dude, where'd you find the sound lollipop? Come on, MJ, put that candy in your mum, ma, mam, mamma, mum, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma' mouth right now. I'm like, oh my gosh, this is so, this is, I just saw this, this, I just saw this, he's just got released. Okay, guys? Mudge! Mad, Mad, Mad, Mudge. It's a musical lollipop, a musical lollipop.

I need a up my theme song game, man. Yeah, you really, really do. Y'all are throwing some fucking bang. Y'all are, this, these theme songs slizz-app. Thank you, thank you. I'm so excited for you, MJ. This is been, like, this is one of the new, so, yeah. I think that, like, do you remember they used to make things,

like, they used to make something like this that was like, it, like, makes your head sound like a stereo, and, like, it just doesn't. So I'm so curious. Okay, so it's called Tasty Sounds Audio Lollipop. Listen to music through your mouth. Quote, unquote, electronic slash dance. Wait, let me take another picture because I feel like I could, I can't really.

Yeah, there we go. Give me a smile for me, MJ. And it looks like a little microphone. Am I wrong here? Thank you. It looks like a little microphone. Or vibrator or baby rattle or a lot like a vibrator. Jackie.

Yeah. Okay, so. Oh, it even has a playlist. It plays Watch Me Rise. Don't you dare let go and keep on pushing. I don't, wait. What are those songs? Those are weird.

Those are fucking fake songs, dude. Those are not songs. Watch me rise. Artist, Phoebe Markowitz. Watch me rise. I feel like it's watching. Is that like watching? Yeah.

Was that watch me. Wait, watch me, nay. Artist Louis Pesikov, Josh Kessler, Mark Ferrari Ariel Reichstag What'd you call us? What did the Third Reich fucking What?

And keep on pushing is by Philip Peter Dudley Panton All over a wild Fibor Fondley Vendton I can't believe this Inside of a lollipop So where Is the sound coming out of the handle

Or is it coming out of the sugar? I don't know Okay, it has a guide on it. How to enjoy. Step one. Long press the button to turn on. Okay, I should say we got this at five below. My kids made me get it.

Yeah, man, I got to get myself over to five below. Although I did just get something, some kind of peelers. It looks like you're long pressing the lollipop itself. Put ear plugs in. Put ear plugs in? Oh, my God. There's ear plugs. Plug it.

Do you have to plug it into the lollipop? I don't think they're like Bluetooth. I think they're ear like protectors. Oh my God, what's about to happen? I got to take my headphones off. I'm going to put the earphones in. I'm so scared for you. And, oh, this is going to be a nightmare.

I'm putting the headphones back on over the earbook. Put the headphones back on. Okay. And so then, all right. Except you're not supposed to do extra protection. I bite on the candy. I, I, I, I, I, I, um, I. I

What's happening? I'm being MJ's mouth for them. Wait, wait. No, it's not out here. Yeah. It's inside you, dude. It's inside you, bro. It's not out here.

Bro. Oh my God, the music's inside MJ. How is it inside? It was inside you all along. Like the other MJ. Don't bring up that MJ. Are you sure it's not, you can't hear it? We can't hear anything.

Whoa, it's only inside your head. This is the future. Sing it on the outside while you suck, bro. Sing it while you suck. Oh, wait. Wait, open your mouth. Open your mouth while you're sucking it. Look it and open.

Stop laughing. Everyone stop. We can kind of hear the faintest, faintest, faintest. I don't understand what's happening. So is it echoing in your head, dude? and coming out of your mouth, is it in your brain? I think it's coming out of this. It's not.

What's going to your phone? I don't, dude. What's happening? I took the earbuds out. Why did they put your protection a lot? I can hear it really loudly. Inside your head. It's not.

Whoa. This is crazy. I don't understand. I don't understand. I don't understand. It's made out of ghosts. It's made out of ghosts. Throw it away.

Watch me rise, watch me rise, watch me rise, watch me rise. And then keep on pushing and keep on pushing in you. Because I'm so hard inside of your mouth. Leavenbread. Like leaven bread. I'm having a whole dance experience over here. I can't believe you guys can't hear it. Crazy.

How does it? I have to experience one of these. What does it taste like? Yeah, does it taste good? It's good. It's a good lollipop. You look like a big baby sucking on your lava. You just look like a person eating a lollipop in silence right now.

And now you're like a psychopath. Because out here, we don't hear. In the real world, in the human world, can you speak about the human world? You don't understand what we go through now in reality. Can you speak to the human world right now? No, I'm so shocked. All I can think about is the lollipat. I have forgotten I'm hosting a show right now.

Right. Because I can feel it vibrating when it's not in my mouth. But I think that it's. Because it wants to go in to make sound. Mm-hmm. Do you think this is what's happening with pink right now? Tasty sound. because she's just being a B.

She's just lost all concept of reality. Like just really trying to make it so that you guys can hear it. But as a result, it's like, yeah, really not. It's making it quiet or no, I don't have it in my mouth. I can't, it's not, my brain's not. But that's crazy. Now I want what's so bad. It's so bad.

It's a mouth magic. Oh my God. What's his name, Dayton, Mealtime? You hear it really loud. That's the crazy part. They hear it really loud. It's not super loud, but I definitely hear her music. I can't believe you guys can't hear it.

What is happening? No, I don't know. What is happening? I just feel like the second I get it, are you going to start shoving it into everybody's mouth and be like, hear it? Does the music stop when you take it out of your mouth? Yes.

We're here trying to hold up to the microphone wall and I'm real about. I'm sorry to the audio listening. I truly. I love this, MJ. I can't focus on anything except this. That's crazy, MJ. I love this. Oh my God, I have to, have to have to, have to find one.

I have to. What is the flavor? Is it like a blue raz? It's blueberry. It's good. It's a good lollipop. I don't even like lollipops, but it's a good lolliput. How much did that cost?

It was, that was the kids brought it up to me and I was like, nope, nope, not doing it. And it was like under $5. Okay. Oh, I'm impressed. Which is obviously a lot for a lollipop, but not for a dance party. For a dance party inside your mouth. Inside your head. I just feel.

I wonder if it's like alien radio transmissions. That's why we've never heard of those people before because they're like, alien people. Oh, and this is their way into your dome. MJ, if you start acting differently? Yeah, you got to stop. Is this probably communicating? Oh my God, Holden's sidebar? What if MJ, like, what if there's an alien currently leaving, like, through the music, it's entering into their brain? I'm pretty sure right now, MJ is legally, technically a data center. Like, I think that's what's happening. So how much water are they going to be using that? Oh, my God. You need to get some water in your system.

Okay, I have turned the lollipop off. I've put it back in the box in hopes that I can show the kids when they get home. But that is the, that was, that was, that was, I feel like I just went out a trip. Yeah, that is hell. That is hell. That is hell. I want to be it. Sure.

It's a hell I want to be in. But that is hell. We're in hell. I want it so badly. Now I'm like, going to spend the whole rest of my day. Like, can I hear it? Is it inside my head? Well, MJ, though, real quick.

Every time you put it in your mouth, is it the same song or does it play a different song? I think that when you press the button, it can switch to between three different songs. Have you listened to all three? My question is when you put it in your mouth and then take it out and then put it back in is like the song restarting? Or does it just keep playing from where it was? It's because the music is, I think, pretty generic. It was kind of hard to tell. Oh, is it still playing right now, MGM?

Do we need to restart you? No, it's not still playing. I think that it plays. I think that it's something in the lollipop itself that when it's in your mouth. When it's where. It starts playing. I don't know when it starts vibrating. Jackie, can I throw this out there?

Yeah. Because I don't, I don't want to ask MJ to do this. I just don't feel appropriate asking MJ to this. I think you might know. You think I might know where I'm heading with this, right? Yeah. Put it in your pussy. Yeah, could you put that thing in your asshole and your pussy for me so we can find out if it like works in the bottom hole?

You have to go pussy first. You can't start back. You can't go back. You can't go back to front. Anybody who rode in. Don't go assholes. a pussy, but yeah, try, go a giant ass on it. Honestly?

And MJ, I don't want you to do that. I don't feel like that's my place. Yeah, I appreciate your designating that to Jackie because I know you guys have that type of relationship. Yeah, I think that this is, I think this is a really honestly for Jackin on Friday. Actually, it's different. I just respect men.

You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's an issue of misogyny. Thank you. And that we understand here on page seven. Oh, do we understand that? but also Holden, thank you so much. Thank you so much.

Thank you so much. For hanging out with us on this week's episode of page seven. And of course, guys, we've got a new show this week. So don't worry. Next up, so I bet you're surprised. You're like, oh my God, page seven on a Wednesday. Yes, not only page seven on a Wednesday, but you're going to be getting second helpings tomorrow.

And then on Friday, you'll be getting your brand new show, page seven dark-sighted that I will be co-hosting with Kara Clank, where we get into, You know, maybe some of the Kim Zolsiac stuff, you know, maybe some other things that we're not getting into over here. Yeah, I'm glad I was, honestly, I probably would have had the, I mean, I think we all agree with how annoying Sydney Sweeney is, but I, you know, I'm glad to have been spared. We're being spared. The me just complaining about her breasts and how large they are. Yeah.

For the, the fact. For the gambling. For the gambling. You know, it's just, wow. It's amazing. And she's like, can I get another ball to put in front of my lump so I can, oh, I'm, look at me. Don't she just want to watch me lay dead eyeed on a bed while you just, like, kind of slug on me for a little while? You know, I do.

But I do want you to get on over to YouTube.com slash at page seven pod because that's where you're going to be getting all three shows over on the YouTube. You'll be able to get that there. The new show is also an audio podcast as well as a YouTube. YouTube, so don't you worry about that. MJ? You can follow us on Patreon. patreon.com slash page 7 podcast. You can email us page 7podcast

at gmail.com. We really do love hearing from you. And more than anything, we love you, Holden. Please come back soon. I didn't even ask you to promo your stuff. I don't even want to know. I don't even want to know where we can find you. No. Honestly, nerds up on YouTube, but we just had a very successful episode with Jackie. Yes.

That was awesome. Please everybody check it out if you are wondering, if you wanted to hear me scream or get into Joss. I didn't scream. Actually, it was more of just really genuine good conversation. Yeah, that was awesome. So check nerdamouth out on YouTube, Twitch.tv.4 slash Holdenatorsho.

Check up with Holdys every week. And check out LPN TV, Bloodbath 77, is just going to finish out this week. So get in there. Watch all those episodes. And we'll be moving on to other stuff very soon. But yeah, thanks so much, everybody.

Thank you for having me. Oh, thank you, Holden. and everybody will be back with second helpings tomorrow, and we will see everybody then. Bye. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors, you can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.