Page 7 - Pop History: Martha Stewart

Episode Date: May 26, 2020

We explore the life and times of writer, tv personality and stone-cold business bitch, Martha Stewart. Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

This is the Martha Stewart song that she sings along. She's always singing this song. And she goes, hi, welcome. This is the Martha Stewart song. Hello, welcome. Yes, we're going to plant some plants. Because I am not a robot. I am a lady.

Look how big my hands are. And then she pulls her hands out and they're like, huge. They're huge. They're comically large. They're commonly massive. Stewart is also a prop comedian. Do you guys do any research on Marcus Stewart? I feel like you did it.

We've got things you talk about. You sound like you're trying to deliver a seventh grade book report in front of the class and you didn't do any research. Just taking guesses. The old yeller did survive in our hearts and in our smiles. Old yaller. That was a little too real.

Did this happen to you? Oh, my God. We should do an episode on old yeller. Oh. Well, the old yeller of cooking and homekeeping television shows, Martha Stewart. You know what? Quaranteed confession, I don't think I've ever read

Old Yeller before, but all I know is, I know the end. Spoiler alert, I know the end. It sounds like you had to give a book report on it. I bet I did at some point. I'll never read it and you can't make me. You probably did. But I will read about Martha Stewart because, guys, I love Martha Stewart.

And this is, I was just yelling and ranting about this to Natalie, right before we started recording. And it's crazy as someone that is so known to technically, on paper, be evil. She's shrewd. She's a hardcore businesswoman.

She is for number one and she looks out for herself and on paper that is a very scary human being. And yet everything that I read about her while doing this episode made me love her even more. I like her.

I agree. Agreed. I think that there is something to be said for a woman that like all these books, all these tell-alls come out about her. And she never refutes anything that's in them. She takes it coolly and keeps on going and just keeps building. I think for her, her biggest screw you to all of her haters out there is just continuing to be as monumentally successful as she still is. I love you, Martha Stewart.

I love, too. She got in the game late. She was like this fucking. housewife homemaker person and then she just ditched all of that to show everyone else how to be the perfect housewife homemaker person. She wasn't doing it herself. Then she went to prison. My favorite thing about her, this sums up Martha Stewart. My favorite bit of research on her was she gets out of jail and they're like, what did you learn? What was your growth from being in prison? She's like, you know what? Mawfucker. She didn't say that, but I'm saying that. You know what? Nothing. I didn't deserve to go. I didn't learn shit. And now. I'm out and I don't give a slit. And I love that. Oh, and she wrapped.

That's interesting because she also wrote a book immediately after jail, which is actually really fascinating. There's a lot of her backstory, but she had met so many women in jail, and we'll get into this later, but she, who wanted to start businesses when they got out and she wanted to give them advice. So she wrote a book. But also, Holden, before she was a housewife, she was a model who supported her whole family. So you've got to check yourself.

Yes, and a stockbooker. What do you mean? She wasn't just over here. And a caterer. Then she quit all that and she started renovating that farmhouse. That's what I mean by that. And that's kind of where she picked up all of her stuff on renovation, cooking, all of these things. And then just like exploded.

She taught herself everything. Did you guys, like, did you know about her as a kid? Were you familiar with Martha's children? No, very much so. Oh, oh, was I, I didn't know her as a kid. But as a kid personally, I was a kid personally. I was aware of her, even though she was completely outside of my spectrum. How would you, how were you not aware of her?

She's omnipresent. She's everywhere. She's everywhere. I was talking to Jackie before we started and my grandma and my aunt, Kathy, were obsessed with her. And they're both like these incredible homemakers. Their homes are so beautiful and they make this amazing food. And they always were obsessed with Martha Stewart. And when I was younger, I just kind of thought it was old lady stuff.

Like, oh, this is boring. This is lame. And then as you get older, you get to know your face. family a little better and you're like, oh, actually my aunts and my grandmother are fucking coolest shit. And Martha Stewart's actually really cool. I just didn't understand it because to me she looked so vanilla as a kid. I didn't understand that it was a much more complex thing than her just like showing you how to fold

napkins. I feel like I grew up in a house too where my mom, it was. See, my mom wasn't a Martha Stewart lover because my mom was a bit of an anti-Martha Stewart, which also made me look into her more. because my mom believed in that there's no right way to have a home. There's no correct way to have a dinner party, even though, but at the same time, if you want to know how to set a table,

don't you look to Martha Stewart to tell you how to actually properly set a table? There is a way to do it. There are proper ways to do things, and I feel like that it's something that now that we don't get into, like, the, what is it, cross your legs, you slutty, what are those schools? Like the good, the manor schools. Manor schools.

Cross your legs, you slutty. Don't be a dirty doughty. Walk with the paint on your head and like it, well, and also fillate. Yeah, properly. I totally. That is actually, that's not that far off because when I started

looking, when I was like 14, 15, we would look through my answer. like manners books and shit and there were sections inside of it that told you how to properly behave at an orgy and shit like that which was pretty fun to find at the same time you have to know

do you jump right in do you wait off to the sides do someone have to give you a wink and a tip of their penis to say welcome to the orgy you put a little hat on your penis and you tip the cap of your penis and if you don't do these things then you will they will dress you up like a dog

and you'll become the orgy dog and then it's all... And that's every specific orgy has their own rules to what happens to the orgy dog. Maybe it's great. Yeah, maybe you want to be the orgy dog. It could be. Depends on how into just whatever you are.

You know what I mean? That's what the orgy dog is going to deal with. It was a different time back then and women need to know these things. Not just women. All people need to know these things. But especially women because you weren't allowed to express that kind of shit when you were... And you couldn't ask your mom.

how do I act in the orgy? You know? You shouldn't. Don't ask your mom that. Although my mom was probably pretty good at it. Oh. You think your mom, what would you give your mom and a rating from one to ten as a participator in an orgy?

She's definitely going to hear this. What is it? One to ten? I don't know what's worse. Yeah, which one's bad? She's a go-getter. You shouldn't be that good at orgy. No, I think because she's a go-getter.

And I think if there is something my mom does, she's like, like, cream in a coffee. She rises. to the top. I don't know if that... I don't get that. That's not what happens to cream. Cream mixes very well with coffee.

I'm drinking coffee right now. It's just completely mixed in. It doesn't rise in the top. I think you're using old cream. Oh, she's not old cream. How dare you call my mother old cream? Your mom is a bucket old cream. I'm ready to talk about my watch as Stewart today.

She's a hot fresh cream from the cow. I think for me personally, this is derail the episode. I think for me personally, Martha Stewart was like whatever for me, kind of in the background, always around, always this symbol of like perfection, you know, as a lady in the house. But then she went to jail. And my appreciation of her, she took one for the team. She fucking kept her head up the whole time. She wasn't one of those celebrities, like going into prison.

You know what I mean? Not like an aunt Becky. No, she's the opposite of the Lori Loflens. She just was like, okay, fine. And did it. I'll do it then. You B words. And I think it's because she started from a young age of being in a huge family that

talk about inspirational. Talk about old cream rising to the top of the coffee. That is a Martha Stewart. It doesn't work. It doesn't happen. I said old cream. I said old cream. That doesn't work either.

That's not true. It was a hypothesis. Just trying to make the bad metaphor. work we hypothesized about the fact that maybe old cream would rise to the top that doesn't mean bring it back up as a definite now metaphor for life for Martha Stewart it is she's a go get him girl okay all right and she like it is and and I'm excited to talk about just like the bullet point list of shit that went down after she got out of prison she fucking attacked career shit like a banshee when she got out of prison.

And it's because she had worked so hard to get to where she was because she really didn't come from a whole lot. She came from a large immigrant from Poland family and she was the second of six kids and they didn't really have a whole lot. And her dad was this insane disciplinarian who forced, not force them, but they had to do everything themselves. They wanted a new dress they could make it. Yeah, we're getting into it.

All right. Let's get into it. She was born in Jersey City. New Jersey in 1941 and everything else that Jackie said, I have written here, so I'll skip it. Can I jump in quickly and say that she was on an episode of Knowing Your Roots? I think the show is called them PBS. Not to be confused with Roots. No, I didn't watch Roots to figure out Martha Stewart's.

She was not in it. Surprisingly. She wasn't. She was not from the Mayflower. They came from Poland. But her grandmother came in on the ship alone at 16 to Ellis Island with $2. And she was by herself completely. And she made a family with another immigrant.

Wow. Yep, doing the old immigrant American dream. And her original last name is Costaira. And you could see her mom in a lot of the, a lot of episodes of the Martha Stewart show. Yes. Because her mom is, oh, my God, we're a little cute. She's a whippersnapper. You can definitely see that where Martha gets it from, her mother's also named Martha.

They call her Big Martha. And Big Martha Castira is the one that taught her almost everything before she taught herself everything else. Is that a Polish tradition to have the mom named the daughter the same name? I think it might be just like that's like a tradition tradition, right? Polish people. Is that a thing that happens in Poland? Are you talking about my people? Yeah, screen door on the submarine.

Yeah, Jackie. Martha Kuntikinti Stewart at just 10 years old. No. That wasn't her middle name. I'm sorry, I was getting confused again with the television show Roots. I know. It's very confusing. At 10 years old, she would serve as babysitter to the kids of famous Yankees.

Mickey Mantle, Yogi Berra, and Gil McDougald. Either way, Yogi Berra, he's funny. That's all I have. By the way, that's all I have in your research. Oh, my God. Well, we got a lot more. That's it. That's actually all she did. She was a babysitter and that's all she needed to do. She founded the babysitters club. Yep. She wrote all of them. No, she did it, but she was actually, she started modeling at the age of 13 as well.

Oh my God. Have you seen the photos of her? Yes. gorgeous. Her modeling photos. I was actually taken aback by how stunning those photos. She wasn't like a half-assed model. She made money and like supported her family and those pictures are incredible. Like she's so pretty. She is She's gorgeous And she was She knew from early on That she was going to make a living for herself And do it all on her own Hence the modeling, hence the baby's

And she even actually went out of her way To plan her friend's birthday parties When she was a kid And ask for payment for it I wish I had those brass cajones Because I always just Coming from a working class family Never feel like I'm doing enough to earn money

I never want to like ask and own myself in that way and go like I deserve the money right yes give me this money no she is I think shrewd is the word of the day I don't think we should scream every time we say the word shrewd because it's going to come up over and over again but I there's there's a go get him thing that I don't have that was not instilled in me of go get what you deserve then and demand your payment for it because also her father was very super critical is what her older brother Eric says and Martha is also very demanding

it's a family curse but also the family gave her blessings the mother of course would teach her all about cooking and sewing and her grandparents taught her the process of canning and preserving and Martha Stewart referred to her as Big Martha that is as her greatest teacher

and it was her father who had a passion for gardening so all of these different elements of course come together when it comes to Martha Stewart Living and all of that stuff coming down the line later on. It's those things. So it's like here is how to do these very specific things, these very specific trades, these very specific crafts talents.

Also though, thin for yourself. Finn for yourself, girl. You got to do it yourself because you're one of six. And of course, I mean, every time I go and visit my wife's sister's family, she has a six children and it is very like that you see that everyone needs to kind of pitch in and do for themselves and it's like

oh are you hungry right now you need to solve that problem not me not mama you need to solve it is like why we love watching the Duggers and things like that where it's like all right if I'm going to have a million kids I know I know six kids is not a million kids but then I would just keep having them

so that by the time I'm too tired to do the things for the young ones the older ones do it. Yeah, it's fun. Me, like on the Dugger family, the older daughters raise the kids, and then when the older daughters leave, the little kids are traumatized. They get steady on the lips. They're traumatized because their mommies leave and start another family, and so the little kids don't have a real mom. So that's what Martha Stewart has to do. Exactly. She has to go, and her sister even described her at the time as a hyper-competent perfectionist who grew up with a sewing needle in one hand and a hammer in the other. Cool.

Yeah, right? She also liked her extracurriculars in school. She was a big part of the art club, the school newspaper, whatever she could do. She was that person that, yes, I did kind of hate when I was in school. But now I can appreciate that sort of go-get her attitude. For college, she ended up going to Barnard College of Columbia University, initially to major in chemistry, which switched to art and history and later architectural history. Wow.

Yeah, she really wanted to go to Stanford, but she didn't want to. to be so far away from home, which is why she went to Barnard instead. And this is really when, so I was reading the book Just Derserts by Jerry Oppenheimer. So let's frame Just Desserts a little bit. We have to give a preface that Just desserts, correct, Jackie? I did not, I did not read the book. I read around the book. I read things about the book. This is like a hot goss rag piece. There are three different Hot Goss rag pieces about Martha Stewart. The unauthorized biography. It's very unauthorized. I think we need to hit that home that for everything that Jackie says that's a truth

there is very easily a thing in there that is a lie. And it's up to you to figure out which one's which. He had a lot of people that he talked to. He talked to almost every person in Martha Stewart's life. She was not a part of it. But you'll also see it again with the book that the woman that threw her under the bus wrote about her as well as the book that her daughter will write about her eventually. Because again, shrewd. She's not the nicest. But this is around the time when Jerry Oppenheimer was talking about how she grew up in a family ruled by a mean-spirited father.

And how in a way she showed herself to be both a man-chaser and a man-hater. Yes, queen. A driven and ambitious woman who played fast and loose in business and even in her marriage. So you'll see it time and time again. So I dug into further and we'll get to it after the divorce and everything. She is a bit of a, she likes using men. And I think that she's very scary about it. But I will say, and I hate to say this, very inspired.

Because of all the things that I will say about Martha Stewart, that she openly says time and time again, where like, oh, you say all these things, but if I was a man and being this shrewd of a businessman, you wouldn't be going after me about it. Right. But at the same time, I do feel like she gets away with not being nice to her partners in a way that a man might not, at least not anymore.

Well, look, I'm in a relationship where my wife is a pure bully, all right? And I do appreciate it. She is not. She makes me an orgy dog when there is no orgy. We are just in the house. She puts me in a dog. costume. I am on my knees and hands in knees all day.

Barking, yelping. You have an intervention. Like, I do get worried about you in that house with her by yourself. You should. The floppier the ears, the harder the penis. I couldn't imagine the, I never thought marriage would involve such emotional. I'm not even going to say abuse it's its own word. It's anigmatic

technique, I'm going to say, is what she does emotional. Yeah. It is a house of mirrors in here, right? Did she learn it from Martha Stewart? I think she may have, I saw her reading one of Martha Stewart's latest book, How to Make the Man a Absolute Dog in Your Home. And I do think that is where she got some of this stuff. It was that number, Martha Stewart's 96th book, right? Right. Yes. And she was highlighting things and laughing, cackling like a witch. And it was just very frightening. I might have to borrow that book for me. Your wife sounds cool.

But going back to school with Martha Stewart, she is modeling now to supplement her income. She did get a scholarship, so she is doing that, but she does need extra flow. I believe it was in 1961 that she also won Glamour's best-dressed woman on a college campus, kind of thing. Like, she was hot. Yeah.

Yeah, we'll post some of the photos on our Instagram. She still looks great. I mean, I don't say it was. Yeah. She doesn't use like her sexuality in the same way when she's younger. She is like hachi-machi. No. And that's what is so fun when she becomes a stockbroker too.

And she's openly about all these things. So all right, she goes to school. She gets married to this dude, Andy Stewart. He is a, his father is a stockbroker. And they get married at the age of 19. So she's in the middle of going, like getting a great college experience. a model, doing all these things for herself. And then she just becomes a stockbroker.

She doesn't have any experience. Yep. And I love that picture. That picture of her on the subway, bright-eyed, ready for the day. So confident. I would love an ounce of that confidence back when I was her age. And to march into a stock market, you know, and just take it by storm. Do you have much on her stock market days?

I don't know how successful she was or whatever. Also hilarious. that she would start out in stocks when that would, of course, be her undoing many years later. Yes. She writes a little bit about it in the Martha, Martha's Rules, Martha Rules book, the one that she wrote when she got out of prison. Mostly just saying she didn't like it, but she learned a lot about how to invest in a company, what not to do, not putting all of your money in at the top and then losing all this money. So watching people do stock stuff just taught her how to be smarter.

to own a business. Business, business, business. Yeah, because she's got all this knowledge in cooking and stuff like that, but she doesn't have that business stuff that's going to be so fundamental for her career. I actually do have a quote. She said, this job taught me so much about what it takes to build a real business, a real company, a meaningful and useful enterprise. No, this is how she's putting this all together. So Andy Monis, who's the dude that hired her, said it was a time when not many women were stockbrokers, but she was beautiful. She was Columbia educated and it looked as if she was going to work very hard because she was from a poor background. She seemed like a good package to bet on. I would say her strongest attribute, other

than being intelligent, was that everyone liked her. So I was reading this article about the dude that hired her, Andy Monis, talking about how when she went in and everyone's wearing these stodgy suits and that she didn't come in like as a smoke show like low cut dress on, she came in with power suits on. She came in, like, even though she didn't really know what she was doing, she went out on that floor and she fucking pretended like she did, man. Just for the job you want, not for the job you have. She did.

She, of course, made a big entrance every morning, too. She'd walk in and release three ravens into the stock market room. Everyone was like, please get them out. Please get them out. It was just chaos in there when she walked in. It would distract people so much. She'd be like, buy Coke, sell Pepsi. and, you know, yada, yada, yada, and just crushed it.

But, of course, unfortunately for her as well in 1965, she gave birth to her daughter, Alexis. And of course, their relationship, she is a mother, perfect, flawless. Nothing wrong there, nothing else to talk about. Correct, Jackie, you're the one with all the good goss. We will talk about it a little bit later on. We'll talk about it later because I will say she was a bit cold.

And I think my favorite part about, the relationship she had with her mother is that now she has created an entire career talking about how it's almost like a mommy dearest type situation that she's created a podcast and a show and a book

about how awful her upbringing was and to the point that Martha Stewart even brought her on the show to talk about some of the things that she said and Martha kind of just laughs about it in a way because she's so overdrew like it's the kind of thing where like

a three-year-old throws himself on the floor and is screaming and they say, I'm going to hold my breath until I die. You're like, go ahead. You're just going to pass out. And that's a way of mothering. That's a way of mothering. That's a way of mothering. I'm going to glean from this.

My opinion is that she probably was a very cold mother, but it's not the kind of Mommy Diaz where she was getting beaten and stuff like that. She was just sort of told she needed to figure out how to take care of her own shit when she was very young and maybe not But at the same time, it's not like she's living in a trash can She has a house filled with staff Right. So if that's, I don't mean, I'm not saying that being emotionally having emotionally disparates is nothing.

But she did grow up in homes with staves. And of course it wasn't a trash can. It was a renovated trash can. Martha Stewart added just linens to it. Yeah. Yeah. From her famous book, Martha Stewart's true. Trash.

For the Stewart's trash is your bounty, I believe it's the name. But also how to make a man an absolute dog in your house by training him to be one. The 96th the book. Please definitely purchase this book. So in 1971, this is really where it gets kicked off, Doug, is when Martha and Andy Stewart purchase a farm home called Turkey Hill in Westport, Connecticut. So this time you're living in the city. So she decides to quit her job because she wants to be,

she decided that the home was really her place. She said it wasn't until I left Wall Street that I discovered my true entrepreneurial bent. I loved ideas. I loved building. I loved creating. I loved making things that would enhance everyday living. And I loved making money as a result. Yeah.

Also, also another very important tidbit that's going to come into play in just a little bit. Andrew Stewart before they moved he founded a publishing house and so again all of these ingredients all come together the stock market the family teaching all these different trades and things the publishing house it's all going to come together

and of course this massive renovation project and Turkey Hill Turkey what she does to this farm is monumental in terms of what she's going to later do for the world completely renovates this house

from the inside out. And she taught herself how to do all of it. And this is after she did all the stock trading stuff. Right. Yes. So as she's doing all this, this is a fun little,

the staff people who worked at their Westport home, Turkey Hill, began calling the place Turkey Hill because of the way they saw Martha treating her husband like a dog turned. Oh my God, this all comes back around. And of course, that will come into play

with her book, How to Renovate a Man. when I learned from Turkey Hill to get my own dumbass turkey into shape. From dog to dog turd. One of her chefs recalled that Martha was always shrieking at Andy. So she's learning at her completely

reno all this stuff. So what does she decide to do? She's trained herself by preparing. So they are also at this point, they're newly wed and everything, and they were traveling the world. And this is the first time she'd ever done these things. So she's preparing every dish from Julia Child's mastering.

art of French cooking. And what she do? She decides to place a newspaper ad offering her services at a caterer. And then she, as a caterer? As a caterer? She decides. She's like, I've found myself preparing blindly for a wedding for 300 people. Wow.

Okay. The catering company started in her kitchen in 1973. And that's also where it laid the groundwork for the cookbooks and cooking TV shows that would help make her household name down the road. she makes this catering company with Norma Collier. This is another 10-coat, if you will. But Norma, I mean, said because they don't last too long together. They're making everything from scratch.

They're making, again, yeah, these are going to serve the bases for the future. But, yeah, she, Collier very quickly became at odds, right, with Martha Stewart. Collier claimed that Stewart was difficult to work with. Yes. And she was actually another high fashion model that she met in college. And it was Stewart's first partner in business. Now she's a financial analyst. But by Collier's account, Stewart began claiming more than her share of the credit while doing less of the labor.

One day Collier says she walked into the Stewart's house bearing salmon and puff pastry for 300 and overheard Martha telling Andy, her husband, I'm more talented and I deserve to make more money out of the business. Collier soon severed their partnership. But Martha, of course, so was she wrong then? I mean, maybe she was more talented. And also, but she was definitely doing less of the work, though, is the problem. But was she, or does, I mean. Who knows?

I don't know. I'm not trying to be a steward apologist, okay? Right. I'm definitely going to, I might, though. I am going to be a little bit of a steward apologist. A stewardist. A stewardess. Also, the catering business is called uncatered affair.

Martha Stewart said, I loved ideas. I loved building. I loved creating. I loved making things that would enhance everyday living. And I loved making money as a result. Yeah, Martha. I already said that quote. Yeah, that was what he said.

Yes. You're a double quoteist dog. Dog man. Where's Lexi? Dog turned to dog. It's Pavlovian at this point. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to repeat your quote.

But she also said, I loved ideas. I loved building. I loved creating. You're bad. I love making things that would enhance everyday living and I loved making money as a result. I mean, that last quote is great, but this is one of my favorite apart, Norma Collier,

stated that Martha's parties were always on the wild side. I knew they had nude pool parties. Martha told me that these parties were happening, and she told me she was not inviting my husband and me because she knew we were uptight Republicans, wet blankets. Martha was not embarrassed by any of this. said it was fun and liked it. She's an experimental person and will do anything to get kicks or shock people.

See, this is the side of her that I love. That I didn't understand as a kid, but it's sort of almost like an underlying understanding about her, which is sort of, I think, what the Anagosteer impression of her from the 90s SNL sketches was because it would be like Martha Stewart doing all these like cute Christmas things, but she'd be topless in some of the scenes without mentioning it. You know, like she has that, that, like, swingy side of her. I think that's why I like Ina Garten so much. I love the barefoot contessa because in my brain, and I don't know if this is true,

with Jeffrey and everything, in my brain, she and Jeffrey have crazy swinger parties in their big, beautiful kitchen. And that's probably not true. But since we know all this stuff about Martha Stewart, I assume Ina Garten is fucking laying point. I mean, if we say it on the podcast, we can just get that started as a rumor. And then sometimes those things just become the...

Because it's coolest fuck. I think it's great. I will say, too, one of my favorite articles that I originally read growing up of hers in Southern Living was from weddings to wet holes, how to prepare for pool side anal. Which was just a delicious dish of an article

and really taught me everything I needed to know, not just about the birds and the bees, but, you know, swimwear. That explains the... Even though it's wet with chlorine, doesn't mean you can get in there. It explains the end of your... Yeah, exactly.

All that stuff. It really explains the end of your wedding, which I was confused about. I wasn't expecting the grand finale to end like that. When your mom brought out all those feather boa, I was like, all right, guys. That's what I'm saying. I'm so excited for you guys to see the big fun finale

of my wedding. And, yeah, very inspired by that article. They didn't expect to see so many butts at a wedding, like so many butt holes. Although everyone was very clean. I think they must have. read Martha's other book. You gotta clean down there or the mud gets trapped. Yep. I'm an improvisationalist. So anywho, Stuart ends up, of course, buying out the other half of the

business and taking full control of the catering business. And again, it's not just catering. That's a bit of a mirage. It's also really she's party planning like full on. She's creating It's the entertaining. Events. She's entertaining. And she's also hired around this time as manager of a gourmet food store, but has a disagreement interesting with the owner. She's another issue and is forced out.

So she opens her own store. I love it, dude. She's so cutthroat. She may be such a force of nature that it's hard for her to work with other people. Yeah. In that book that she put out right after prison, she talks about how to really, to really, succeed you should find a lot of different interests like go down a lot of different paths and it seems like she really developed so much interest and knowledge over the years that over so many different

aspects too even going between all those majors in college is somebody who has like a thirst for knowledge and that's probably hard to deal with you know like somebody who likes a lot of different weird things and I'm not difficult to deal with at all ever but I will say that if you, you know, reach in a lot of different directions, people can get really annoyed with you. Because you spread yourself too thin. But then she definitely had a way of like nosing into different places in the right time and in the right way. Because also at this time, I'm going to go ahead and assume it's because Andy worked in the publishing world. That's why I brought it up before.

Yeah. Yeah. But then she started pitching her stories about her own work in her home to local news. and would start writing articles and sending them to good housekeeping, house beautiful, and country living without being asked to. She's just sending shit in being like, I know how to do it. Read this and then they would just use it. There was more of a direct end too because of the publishing.

So she's catering and store running and her hobby becomes president of the NYC Publishing House, Harry in Abrams, Inc. And a book that he was responsible for, which was called The Secret Book of Nomes, was a huge hit. So they wanted to throw a big book release party with Andrew asking Martha to cater the event. She's so charming at the event. And at that party was Alan Merkin, the head of Crown Publishing Group. And he was very impressed by Martha Stewart's culinary talents and her host disabilities. And they hit it off so well that he ended up going on to contact her to develop a cookbook

featuring recipes and photos from parties she was hosting. So it actually was that that is why his publishing is such a direct line to her getting her first book out called Entertaining, which was released in December of 1982, the same year and month I was born. Oh, good year. It was ghost written by a woman named Elizabeth Hawes, by the way. So also, Elizabeth Hawes wrote it, right? And it, on the outside of it, it says by Martha Stewart, text with Elizabeth Hawes.

Miss Hawes didn't get a text by credit and didn't even get invited to the Westport publication. That's a real Don J. Trump move. I mean, it makes sense of why she gets her an apprentice show later on. Shrewd. So while all this is happening, her marriage is falling apart. Her husband, who seems like he was a good dude in the beginning, I think that he just may not have been able to handle it. So it all started.

What was it? Was it just the constant screaming at him that he had a hard time with? Was that? And also, let's start, in 1964, three years after they get married, he had graduated from Yale Law School and they went to Europe to celebrate an occasion. So this is out of the just desserts. And again, it might be how to see. I know this tale. Upset and angry one night after they got into a big fight, Andy went to bed alone while Martha went off with her new friend.

Long after midnight, she returned, claiming they had gone to midnight mass at the cathedral. Now we've got some other she wasn't very nice to him quotes about him. Her manner with Andy became the source of much stress and anxiety and anger. She was constantly accusing him of being dumb or stupid. There were times that there was utter and complete tension and long hostility-filled silences between them that you could cut with a knife. Even down to when she was 19 years old, when the couple got engaged, Martha didn't like the ring, Andy gave her.

So she reportedly demanded he get her a bigger one. he complied. Then on their wedding day, she made him wait for hours at the altar at St. Paul's Chapel at Columbia University in New York. But then Norma Collier says about Andy, Andy loved Martha deeply, but he was always being belittled or betrayed or berated by her. Did this just as her speak to Andy directly or was this through other people telling? It's through other people, but it's through the people that worked for them, that worked in the house. at the time. And so all of this stuff is happening.

And she ends up saying in multiple fights that she was cheating on him. There is no actual proof of any of these things. However, soon they'll be, they'll get divorced. And it's because that Steve, that Andy leaves her for her former assistant, Robin Fairclow, who's 21 years, her, his junior. her. And what Robin found sort of weird was that Martha would always say, you and Andy would be perfect together. Martha used to push them together, laughing about it in her way, which was much more of a put-down of the two of them. It was sadistic. So she was always doing this to them.

And finally, he fucking did. You know what, Andy? Good for you. Yeah, sure. You'll go get it. as well, she keeps saying and pushing you to do it anyway. And it's definitely, that is definitely abuse. Yeah. But that's, again, apologist. But also, it would be interesting to hear that from him, because this is still coming from other people. Yes.

So, you know, it might be a little bit more relevant if that he came out and said it. Yes. Martha Stewart also would claim later that it was about her inability to create a work-life balance. She said it's one of the most difficult things to do. do that balance, which is so elusive to most of us. It didn't work for me. I thought, oh, I can do it. I can do all of that.

I had to sacrifice a marriage because of the lure of the great job, the fabulous workplace. But I don't regret it at all because what I've done is something bigger and better than just one marriage. People who are happily married don't hate me for saying that. But for me, it's true. It's impossible for most of us to get that balance. And I loved making money as a result. But also, they got married. They got married at 19.

Yeah, it's like whatever, dude. And they were, I mean, they're married until 1987. It's like a baby marriage. It's, and it's a young, I mean, she's had an entire life after this marriage. I mean, we're talking around this time, cookbooks such as Martha Stewart's

quick cook, Martha Stewart's hors d'oeuvres, Martha Stewart's pies and tarts, weddings, slamming a mouth. The wedding planner. Martha Stewart's secrets for entertaining. Martha Stewart's quick cook menus and Martha Stewart's Christmas. This is all,

while her marriage is completely going to shambles, but she is rocketing into absolute stardom and fame. It's crazy. In 1986, she made her debut as a featured television hostess on holiday entertaining with Martha Stewart, a public television special in which she cheerfully prepared a sumptuous home-cooked Thanksgiving dinner for her family. The success of the program,

which Crown Publishing distributed as a mail-order video, encouraged Stewart to set her sights on additional television opportunities. Mail-order video. Which is, that's kind of fun. I'd like to order a mail if you know what I mean. Yeah, I would. Send him here. By 1990, Martha Stewart said, I was the 49-year-old mother of a grown daughter, a divorcee,

and I knew that I was onto something big. I've been dubbed a late bloomer, and I love the moniker. I published the first issue of Martha Stewart living that year, and I've been pursuing my dreams ever since, and I loved making money. But I will say that they weren't very good parents. at the time period. You know what? Maybe that family needed sacrifice so we could enjoy

beautiful table setting. I think so because even Andy Stewart looks back on this time with regret. He says, I think we did a poor job as parents. We were too involved in our professional lives and fixing up the house. We were always making the home into a mythological place. But it wasn't a home. We didn't spend enough time with

Lexi. And Holden just put in his sad emoticon. Oh, I didn't know what that was. Was that a sad? I assumed it was a sad emoticon. Because I was too busy doing my goddamn job. Oh, wow. What is that? He loves his Skype emoticons. If Alexis had been a money,

then maybe things would have been better at the household. So take that, Alexis. Why couldn't you have been born a dollar, a hundred dollar bill as opposed to a child? At least or a $500 bill and maybe they would have enjoyed her mayor. You know what, Alexis is doing fine. She is. And also in

1987, before the, even the divorce, is when Stewart signed a lucrative contract with the discount retailer Kmart to serve as the company's lifestyle consultant. While helping Kmart elevate its downmarket image by endorsing and promoting an exclusive line of home products, Stewart received valuable national exposure through Kmart's expansive advertising campaign and attracted a growing following of admirers. And is it crazy that they sold her stuff exclusively until 2004?

That's crazy. I remember, I see, I always... Like, before I watched any of the Martha Stewart videos, I remember Martha Stewart at Kmart. I always do I was at Kmart when I saw Martha Stewart's big mug. Well, I'm more of an Ingalls man myself, but of course I can always appreciate a franchise. I don't know what that is.

What is that? Ingles? Yeah. I think it's a really bad department store. I could be wrong. Oh, my God. Don't you dare even breathe the word J.C. Penny because you know I'm a Penny girl. Oh, R.I.P.

Yeah. R-IP. No, it's still open. No, they just went, they just filed for bankruptcy during quarantine. I want to do with Jackie this. Right now on. Yeah, dude, you learned that on air. The actual pain in your eyes is like, I'm laughing, but you look really, really pain. Oh, I love J.C. Betty.

Maybe they'll get through it. Maybe they'll get through it. Do you think they will? Yes, Jackie. No. Absolutely not. No way on any planet. live at a farm. They're going to be in a better place. What am I going to do? Where am I going to get my

reasonable outfit? There's a million other places you can shop. There's so many other options. But the coupons, man, you know, I had the app and when you didn't even have the coupons sometimes the girl, she'll go and she get a coupon for you. Coles does it, babe. Do they, are they good with the coupons? Oh, yeah. My mom can go in. She'll get so many coupons that we don't even pay for anything when we go. I guess I need to set my sights to Coles then. Yeah. You're a holds girl now. I'm devastated, by the way. I know we have to keep talking about Martha Stewart, but I want to talk about this for the next 20 minutes. A quarterly magazine was first published by Time Inc. in 1990 and went monthly in 1994 called Martha Stewart Living. It features lifestyle content centered around food, home decor, decor, entertaining, crafts, and travel, and also JCPenney filed for bankruptcy in 2020 due to the COVID virus.

I got Martha Stewart Living and Cosmo for about 12 years of my life. I love Martha Stewart Living. Yes. It's a great magazine. There's a lot of ads in it. But you know what? It's great. Again, you need to know how to set a table.

I like knowing the proper way of doing things. You know, you learn how to put a seam in. I've always lived like a dumpster person, like a dumpster. Like a little rodent. Not even a rat. What's less than a rat? I mean, I hate possums. A weasel?

I don't know if that's kind of more than a rat. I like, you know what? I was a possum because of how scary they are and they hiss at you. They do. That was mean. They're so cute. So I never thought about stuff like that. But now that I have like a home with like my little family, it is fun to know how to do shit like this.

And I get it now. One of the most useful things I was taught in college was how to sew a button onto a piece of clothing. That is like every person needs to know how to sew a button on. You have to know how to sew a button on. so useful. Like that is coming to play all throughout my life. Yeah. You know, voice class, go F yourself.

Yeah, dog. You know what I mean? Movement class, go. Who needs it? Who needs it? Because we need money as a result. If there's no money as a result, don't call me. It's not worth it.

Also, she also, I really will say, I grew up reading how did not in the future be turned into a dog slowly and sadistically by your wife? You might want to re-washed it. And I didn't get enough information out of that because, of course, that has happened. Martha Stewart said, I have always considered myself a teacher. And I firmly believe that I had to learn in order to find out what quilling was and why it existed in the first place and to discover why anyone would create veritable works of exquisite art using tiny strips of paper carefully rolled and glued into amazing shapes and forms.

I applied the same level of rigor to everything I do. I get the greatest satisfaction when I hear that someone has learned a simple, good thing from me or a more complex procedure such as how to plant a shade garden or rewire an antique lamp my curiosity knows no bounds i continue to learn each and every day and will continue to teach what i know to as many people who will listen and how does she do that she does it in 1993 when she launched her television show she did the television show of her magazine called martha stewart living and it started off as a weekly half-hour series but soon expanded into a daily hour-long show because it was so popular and also ended up winning her several Emmy Awards before it was discontinued in 2004.

This is also 95 when she releases the Martha Stewart Weddings and she starts getting into the wedding planning business. The biggest fucking racket there is in this country. Oh, and it's so, but it's so money, money, money, money. So much money, money. And I... It's such a racket, dude. I knew somebody in New York that was a,

one of the head carpenters on her show. Oh. And I knew, and he would joke around constantly that she, yes, she was a bit of a nightmare person and yelled a lot, but that she was also very funny. But I do love this quote that she was talking, that she said, I've been perceived as arrogant.

I've sometimes probably forgotten, and I know I have forgotten to pat the back of someone or said thank you, you know, enough times, or even maybe one sometimes. I wish I were perfect. I wish I were just, you know, the nicest, nicest, nicest person on earth. But I'm a business person

in addition to a creator of domestic arts. And it's an odd combination. No excuse. But if I were a man, you know, no one would say I was arrogant. She's a domestic witch. She is a domestic witch. Not to shoehorn it in here for the millionth time,

but I will say it does kind of remind me of the Taylor Swift song, The Man. She keeps bringing up and it is kind of true. like this would be a very, you know, if we want to talk about any other CEO that has a penis in any kind of situation like that, oh, it's totally fine that they're mean

and making moves and they don't stop to say thank you, but for, of course, because she is a woman. Yes. Let me, I would also like to explain some more things to you two ladies about being a woman. Thank you. Thank you.

I'm so glad Holden is here. Thank you, Holden. But as opposed, though, to the Ellen stuff, where Ellen is, I think to people that she works with is psychotic. Like truly, Martha Stewart is definitely, but she's not telling people not to look her in eye.

We can't have a beef with Ellen. That's too much. We have to have to have to be with Ellen. But she's not the kind of person that, like, that no one can look her in the eye. She just likes things the way she wants the things to be done. And like you said earlier, she just can't have a partner.

She's not a person that can have a partner. She's solo, bro. But she will get a partner in a way in Snoop Dog. And I think that their relationship when we get to that shows that she, it does have a heart. Shows that she. I think it's jail that changed her, though. Maybe it's jail that changed her. I really think it was.

And also, just a reminder, J.C. Penny definitely filed for me. Oh, my God. I know, you go, I swear to God, you go in for a suit. So the suit's going to be too big. It's not going to look right on you. Take it to a Taylor. But you're going to get that entire suit with the shirt. You're going to get that entire suit.

$40. I'm telling me, $40. You give me the coupons, you get me into a JZ penny, I'll get you a full suit for you. There's that queen's coming out of you. I miss it already. They already took my suit plantation and now you're going to take JCPen. Jackie, I have a pitch for you, okay? J. Z. Penny.

Holden McAnilly. Yes, dude. Oh my God. Yes, dude. Fill the gap. Get Murch-Stewart on the phone. We have to make this happen. J. Z. Nichols.

Jason Nichols. Oh my God. It's going to be like a double-length episode because there is no focus. Absolutely not. We may be going a little bit stir crazy. But we're doing the job. We're doing it.

Martha Stewart with the launch of the show came the launch of the co. Along with her business partner, Sharon Patrick. They secured funding to purchase all the different print TV and merchandising ventures. They consolidate them into this one company called Martha Stewart Living.

Omnamedia just rolls right off the time. How scary is the phrase Martha Stewart living Omni Media. It is so threatening. It sounds like it's an ominous. Yeah, it's terrifying. And that was in 1997, and she So apparently Martha Stewart and Time Warner, and Time Warner was the one that had control

over a lot of the things that she had already released. They disagreed on her intentions to cross-sell and market her publishing, television, merchandising, and web interests. So essentially, because she wants to meet Omnimedia. She wants to take over everything. So what she does is she pays Time Warner $75 million to get everything that she owns completely under her name. She's both the chairman and chief executive officer of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia. And in 1999, the company goes public in that

very day in the stock market, she is crowned the first ever female self-made billionaire. In one day. In one fucking day. In one day, that stock price. shoots out, but that, I'm loving this. I love these hero tales. We're about to get into her downfall. And at this time, a photographer who had worked for her said she plays the game better than anyone I ever met.

On her TV show, she did a segment on these guys who refinished bathtubs. At the end, they refused to sign her release because it gave her the rights to use the material on video and in books. They held out until Martha gave them more money. Others who have witnessed her TV tapings

describe her as Martha Dearest, who can erupt into a tantrum and then turn on the charm when the camera rolls. So like a way, I'm so smart. So she would have people on the show. And essentially what they are giving her is the rights to explaining how to fix something or how to do something. She can take it and use it for herself. Hey.

Crazy. But it's so smart. So smart. But what's not so smart is the M-Clone stock trading case. M-clone. I will get, all right, here is my little corner. This is it. because Jackie was like, I don't know what the hell is going on with this.

And I explained it to you and you seem to get it. So that was a good test run. Okay, so get ready. I'm going to give you the real deal spiel. Stockbroker time. On the income. What happened and why did she go to jail? Yeah, this is what happened.

Okay. It's essentially, it's insider trading, though. And it's insider training basically is you get some non-public knowledge that no one else knows that allows you to make moves in the stock market to profit or avoid losing profit in her case. So Mclone is a biopharmaceutical company that Martha Stewart owned shares in up until December 27, 2001, when she sold off $230,000 worth of shares. The next day, Mclone's new drug failed to get the approval of the Food and Drug Administration, which led the stocks to drop heavily for them by 16%.

So Martha Stewart, by the way, this is all over Martha Stewart, the first self-made billionaire female in America. she was only avoiding a loss of $45,000. Which is like pennies to her. Nothing to her. This is nothing, nothing, nothing. The CEO of Mclone at that time named Sam Waxel also conveniently sold his share in the company. His share was $5 million knowing what was going to go down.

So this is what happened was. The CEO and Martha Stewart, they both had the same broker at Maryland. Lynch. That guy's name was Peter Bacanavik. Peter Bacanavik only knew, oh, S word. This dude's selling $5 million of his own stock. He must know something. Martha Stewart, you should sell your stock. That's all Martha Stewart knew. And that is what makes this case really difficult for the prosecution, is that they couldn't, it was hard to pinpoint like, oh, you definitely knew this very specific knowledge. All she knew was some major S word stuff is going down. Yeah. And who, Who really put the nail in the coffin for the S word stuff

and put her S word into the fridge of prison? Ooh, frozen ass. Ew. Mariana Pasternak. Now, Mariana Pasternak, her supposed best friend forever. Wow. On December 27th, so when Martha Stewart gets his call

to say, hey, you should sell your stocks, Martha Stewart was on a private jet to Mexico for a vacation with two of three of her friends, one of those friends being Mariana Posternack. In route, she called her office to check her messages, which included one from her broker Peter Beck

Navichich, with news that her in-clone stock had dropped below $60 a share. So Stewart claims she had previously issued a stop-loss order to sell the stock if it fell below $60 a share. So that was around the time, that was the day that

Stewart made her sale. So saying that no, no, no, I didn't get insider trading. I just, I had already said if it goes below $60 a share, immediately sell it. So I was not the one who said to do this. However, Ms. Bitch, Mariana Posternak, who continued on and wrote a memoir called The Best of Friends, Martha and me, which tells the tale of their friendship,

went on the stand. And so this elegant Romanian-born real estate agent sent a shockwave through the U.S. federal courtroom with a revelation that nailed Stewart for insider training of Imklon, stock of a company owned by her friend Sam Waxel. Pasternak recalled Stewart saying, isn't it nice to have brokers who tell you those things during a holiday in early 2002?

So she had said this to her. And under a cross-examination, she wavered. She said, I don't know if Martha said that or it's just me who thought those words. But she said that. What? She went on the stand and said that Martha Stewart said, isn't it nice to have brokers who tell you those things? Wow.

And then she fucking sold her down the river. And then I love this line too. In the ranks of friends to the famous, Mariana Posternak falls somewhere between Cato Caelin and Brutus. And then afterwards, she too has the fucking, has the dare to go on and write a memoir about their friendship. Unbelievable.

What a B, what a C. The words like, cannot say. I mean a lot to me. Yeah, dude. She, but she also went and, like, ripped open Martha Stewart's love life,

kind of trying to throw her under the bus and making her sound like such a nightmare. She said that while Pastor Nack had suitors lining up, she writes, something was not working in the men department for Stewart, who tended to jump into sexual dalliances and drive men away with her desperation. What a shit head. Style stalking. And that apparently was her Stewart's,

signature. Stewart's longtime companion, the billionaire Charles Simoneyi, Pasternak reveals, humiliated her during a party on the French Riviera when he replaced her with a much younger woman. But if the intent of these revelations is to shame, Stuart, the effect is the opposite. It humanizes her. So does a snipe about how Stewart changed after her breakout book entertaining. Her waist thickened and her hands seemed permanently clutched as if grasping for something. What is wrong with this bitch? She turned to a monster. Speaking of things not working out too well

in the men's department, that also must have been true for J.C. Penny who filed for bankruptcy in 2020, too. And also probably had something to do with the dating history that she dated Sir Anthony Hopkins. But actually Martha Stewart is the one that

stopped that because she said he reminded her too much of the Hannibal Lecter character. That's probably a problem for Anthony Hopkins in general. So it wasn't very nice to not only put her into prison, or to help put her into prison, by something that you don't really recall

if she said it or not. And then also writing a book bashing her and her love life to make money off of it. I hope she didn't make any money off of it. I don't like her. She will not be welcomed into Jay Z. Nichols. No, get out of Jay Z. Nichols.

Jay Z. Nichols. No coupons for you, bitch. Stewart was sentenced to five months in prison for obstruction of justice and conspiracy with the insider trading charges is getting dropped and the securities fraud charges dismissed, but it was a series of lies that did her in. She also had to pay the security exchange commission $195,000, which was over four times the loss that she avoided and had to step down as CEO from Martha Stewart living omnibedia

for five years. Martha Stewart said a prison, it was horrifying. And no one, no one should have to go through that kind of indignity, really, except for murderers. And there are a few other categories. But no one should have to go through that. It is, a very, very awful thing. And so I love that. She's just like, I got nothing out of it. But I think she did get stuff out of it. She just, yeah, I think she did.

Yeah, she made things because apparently in prison, you're only allowed to make three things a year. And she only had five months. So, quote, I made an entire crash. I don't know how to say it. It's like the model of the birth of Jesus Christ, the entire scene of the nativity. She said, I had many figures, something like, 15 figures and you're only allowed to make three, but I persuaded them the whole nativity was

one and they fell for it. You couldn't just make three camels. You had to make everything, Stewart said. Naturally, her fellow inmates were enthralled, so Stewart taught them all how to do ceramics. Wait, I didn't, that words craich? That means the model of the birth of Jesus? Yeah, it's like the nativity scene. I've never heard that word before. But also, what does that mean make three things a year? In prison, they... I guess that they're, or maybe in the fancy prison that she was in, that she was only, like, everyone is allowed to make things, but they're only allowed to make three things a year. So she convinced them that the nativity scene was one thing.

I mean, that's just smart. So that she could make the whole thing. And apparently everyone wants the nativity every Christmas. And people always say, where'd you get that from? Then she quip that she likes to add, my prison number's still on it. That's great. Also, she apparently was a bit of a liaison

between the prison staff and the prisoners, and that she was this really good go-between to communicate different issues and things and that makes a lot of sense being such a go-getter. But she definitely feels she did not deserve her punishment and that she is not a bad person. She said, one thing I do not ever want is to be identified or I don't want that to be the major thing of my life.

It's just not fair. It's not a good experience and it doesn't make you stronger. I was a strong person to start with and thank heavens and thank heavens I was and I can still hold my head up high and know that I'm fine and I love. Make in my Money is a result I think maybe what she's trying to say with

the not getting anything from jail is that you don't learn you're not learning a lesson when you go to jail. I think she learned from the people who also were in jail for maybe things that they didn't really deserve to be in jail for or at least for as long as they were in there and maybe she learned the injustices of the jail system but she didn't learn by going to prison.

And I mean, she didn't really do that much wrong. Do you know if the other people involved in that case, did they go to jail? They did. Okay. They did. And they went to jail for much longer time as well. Also, I hope that this is true. Her nickname was M. Diddy in prison.

I read this, that her prison nickname was M. Diddy. I really hope it was. That's not a joke you're making. That's an actual fact. It's on the paper. I really hope that it was. I hope that's true. They do make, if you guys watch Orange,

is the new black. They do have a character that is Martha Stewart-esque in it. And I wonder if they brought her in to, I mean, they were probably too scared to ask. So I'm about red? No, in one of the later seasons, they have an actual like home style maker

that's in there for that. I didn't go to the end season. It's great. But it's crazy that so she went in and she essentially made a lot of friends. She said that when she was in, but also when she was in jail, part of her,

she realized that part of her comeback was shifting the focus of Martha Stewart Living Omni Media. In the past, the company had appealed to the upscale homemaker. But Martha made it very clear at the huge meeting she had when she gets out of jail that she wanted the company to embrace a broader slice of viewers and readers. She wanted Martha Stewart Living to be less alienating to ordinary people. She said the diverse group of people she met in prison inspired her and she hoped to make life better for one and for all. Because also during her jail time, she kept in contact with her fans.

She was posting letters on her website describing her life in prison. And by going to prison early, because we were also looking into like, how did she come back? How was she able to go to jail, say I was wrong, and come back? But she did such a good job because she just chose prison. And she was like, all right, well, I'm going to go in. I'm going to get it done. She didn't do all the appeals and everything. She went in and did it.

And by going to prison early, one marketing expert believes she went from villain to victim. Yes. The result was that Martha Stewart's image was tainted, but she still maintained her popularity and many of her fans' loyalty. And what she says about it. Her stock went up.

Dude, yeah, she said, well, she didn't do anything that suffered was advertising pages in the magazines because some companies actually have stipulations that they can't, I don't know. It was a great magazine and they shouldn't have ceased their advertising. But the brand did not suffer. at all. It was in good hands at the time

and when I came out the stock price was higher than when I had gone in. I do think it comes partly because she didn't act like she was like, woe was me with it. She was like, I'll go do my time. And I think people can respect that. Yeah, she didn't do that. Yeah. Which is like you know, Lori Loughlin shit. It's like, I

can't like her ever again because she acted like such an asshole like such a oh, I'm a martyr. I couldn't possibly, don't you know I'm rich? Like, just like just own your shit and do your time. Do it. Just do it. Just do it. Just do it. She was released in March of 2005, and man, she comes back hard. She's got the Martha Stewart show and her own version of The Apprentice called The Apprentice Martha Stewart by September of that year.

So, and she actually did that with her daughter. Because when she was in prison, was when she started rehabilitating the relationship she had with her daughter. Because her daughter, you know, she wrote the book, Whatever Lands, Learning to Live Here. and she said things like if I didn't do something perfectly I had to do it again I grew up with a glue gun pointed to my head and that book whateverland is sort of a satirical it's a tongue-and-cheek kind of book it's not like a dark tell-all she's making fun of her upbringing right

so it's not so dark that that yeah exactly right exactly right and so they apparently got closer during her mother's time in the federal prison and so when she got out in the apprentice So I had watched the apprentice, Martha Stewart, and she did it with her daughter as well as the current CEO of the company since she couldn't be CEO at that time. And so they had, they changed it up a little bit so it wasn't just like Trump's apprentice that it was different. She was actually a smart person? Yeah. Yes.

It was maybe a little too polite, though. It doesn't do very well. It only doesn't get seasoned. She doesn't. No. There's no your father. She actually says just like goodbye, I think, or something like that. It just wasn't as bullyish.

No, she said, you just don't fit in. Ha! Is what she, was her, you're fired. It doesn't roll off the tongue as much. No, no, no, no, no. But still, she's still doing all these things. She releases a book in October of that year as well called The Martha Rules, which we've been talking about for a bit,

about starting and managing a new business. Then there's also the Martha Stewart baking handbook, and the next year comes Martha Stewart's homekeeping handbook. regularly appearing on NBC's Today Show as well with cooking crafts and gardening segments. Also in November of 2005, the same year. MSLO starts of a 24-hour serious radio channel on which Stewart, I believe she still hosts a weekly calling show in 2006 along with KB Holmes. One of the country's largest community developers, MSLO, made a deal to construct 650

homes in North Carolina, inspired by three of her own houses. She said, let's face it, everybody wants to live in one of my homes. You see one of them and you don't want to leave. The idea here is to give a flavor of that an affordable housing. Oh, this is her version of Flavortown. It's her Flavortown. And I love that Robert Slater wrote in the book Martha on trial and jail and on a comeback. As she planned her comeback, no one asked whether it was a good idea for her to saturate the airwaves with her television and radio programs.

No one was there to ask what would happen if the public did not respond to. enthusiastically to her programs. It was simply assumed that all would go well, that the television and radio programs would be a huge success and that her comeback would seem like the most natural of phenomena. And he's right. It's just she ingrained herself back and it really was, it was as if nothing had happened.

And then you look at her and that you do respect her more because you're like, oh, yeah. But then you came back with such a vengeance of like, no, no, no, no. Because Americans love a comeback. story. This quote about her, they like that Martha made it rich from scratch, that she got it to trouble and that she had to pay the price for it. They like that she did time with grace and dignity, going in early was genius, and now she's earned a second chance. People needed to see her earn something again. They loved her when she was earning her way up the ladder. In 2007,

she launched an upscale line of homewares for Macy's, which was the largest brand launch in Macy's history. With Flore Inc. She also released Martha Stewart branded carpet tiles. Also, also also in 2007. She partnered with E&J Gallo Winery to produce her own wine label, Martha Stewart Vintage. Also, also, also, also she via Costco. She was hawking frozen and fresh food via Costco. And craft items at Walmart.

Martha Stewart attributes to all of these moves happening at such a rate around this time to her legal troubles, which just made everything half to happen all at once from 2005 to 2007. It was going to be more of a slow drip, but she had to just. jump back in the pool, baby. And yeah, she jumps in that pool. But first she receives the healthy amount of anal right by that pool. And she loved money as a result of it. Anal by the pool, get that money.

Yeah, her first track with Snoop Dog, of course, love that entire album. Martha Stewart B. Wylan, which was released in 2010. I wish. I'm sure it has to be. It could happen. I believe it. Yes.

Yeah. Pousat anal. dip in the pool. I'm so mean. I don't. I'm scared. I'm scared. I will make a doggy drool.

That's right. I got a doggy dog husband. That's right. And that's when Snoop dog comes to knees. Oh, yeah. Oh my God. That's why she was prepared for her dog husband this whole time. Yes.

Yes. Oh my God. You just have to find. You have to find the man who wants to be the dog. The dog. Yeah. And that's your partner. You're the husband now, dog.

You're the dog now. No husband. Yes. I do love this quote, though, when she said, I'm not Lenin or Stalin. I don't have a master plan. Jesus. They're just, they're just, they're just insane. Jackie, I love her. Natalie, I'm not Lenin. I'm not Stalin. I'm not Hitler. I'm just a humble person who wants to take over the world. So many things that can come along and interrupt it. That was an actual Martha Stewart quote. I love her. So in 2010, Hallmark Channel and Martha Stewart Living Omnamedia announced a multi-year strategic partnership, which involved her hour-long daytime show, Martha, moving to Hallmark Channel by the end of the year. It airs for two seasons.

It's canceled early 2012, but don't worry, folks. She's still going to make TV whether you like it or not. Martha Bakes airs in 2011, and Hallmark Channel on Hallmark Channel, and Martha Stewart's Cooking School debuted on PBS in 2012. So you get more of it! Watch more of it. She is currently writing her 100th, 100th book. God, nuts. Crazy guys.

Like, the blip in prison was just time off for her to come up with more ideas. Because there's something, too, that we didn't even get into because it's just, she wakes up at like 4.30 every morning. She is a person, she is going. She thinks that essentially sleep is for the week and that she doesn't have time to, like, that napping and sleeping is week. And she, by the way, is stone. 24-7. She's always high. And I don't know what point in her life

she went to weed, but she is now constantly stoned. I mean, maybe it makes her more agreeable. I can only hope. It's definitely not stopping her drive to keep making things. That's her damn sure. And I love ending the whole thing on a high note.

Let's get into her timeline with Snoop Dog. It's the best. It's so good. This is such a not cry episode. This is like just ends on her wonderful, powerful friendship with Snoop Doggy Dog. Please watch this first clip.

You have to watch. Look up the 2008. When Snoop comes on the guest as a guest for the Martha Stewart show for the first time, they're making mashed potatoes. And it's so,

it's like Snoop's about to put in cream cheese and he goes, yababado do as he's putting the cream cheese is. And he also is so surprised at what white pepper is and because she's about to put white pepper in hers. And then he goes, he's like white pepper.

What's white pepper? He's like, on black pepper. And she's like, you're right. You know what? Yeah. Where is the black pepper? Can we get black pepper? She's like, they're all bougie with their white pepper.

And then she starts putting black pepper. And you can see why they make sense. He is chill and brings her back down to earth. And that she even says she was the first one that brought hip hop artists into a daily, like an afternoon talk show experience. Right. Which was so funny. And their contrasts and the way they're alike are.

so perfect, but I would actually recommend even better than that is his second appearance in 2009, where he's making brownies with Martha, because he's even more comfortable, like they're even more, and he really starts letting like the weed references fly and stuff. He says, you know, with the brownies, he's like, when do we add the, um, and she's

like, what's that? What's that? He's like, uh, no sticks, no seeds, no stems. And she's like, later, that's a secret. And just like all these little, just back and forth, Snoop said, I never met anyone like Martha Stewart. When we come together, it's a natural combination of love, peace, and harmony. Hell, I love it.

Martha Stewart was asked, what's the most surprising thing you've learned about Snoop Dog as a person from working with him? She said he has an intense sense of loyalty to the people he works with, to his friends. He's an amazing number of friends.

He stands up for what he believes really strongly. And I remember when, I know we're about to talk about the roast of Justin Bieber, because Eddie Larson of the network wrote for the Justin Bieber roast, and I remember him saying that he was in a circle

where he smoked a blunt with Snoop Dog and Martha Stewart, was standing in the circle and he offered, and Snoop Dogg offered the blunt to Martha Stewart and she goes, Snoop, you know I don't do that. And then winked at him and walked away. And that, like that was what an amazing thing to see. So yeah. In 2015, at Comedy Central's Roast of Justin Bieber, they again make an appearance. They hadn't really made one since that 2009 appearance. Snoop said she was the funniest roaster that night. In that moment, I knew I wanted to be alongside this lady for the rest of my life.

Their friendship is beautiful. Apparently, just Snoop smoking solo the whole time on stage was enough to get Martha so ripped that she ends up taking the podium that way. She said, we had to sit on that stage for four hours. It took four hours to film that roast.

And the secondary smoke is just as powerful as primary smoke. So I was totally high by the time I got up to that microphone. Snoop confirmed this. It's just secondhand smoke, said Snoop's secondhand smoke. But by the time she'd get up there

to tell her, her jokes, she's whacked out of her head, but she steals the fucking show, and I loved making money as a result. She was loose as a goose, high as a motherfucker, and she went up there and killed it. I love

it, dude. After all this is going down, a producer in 2016 pitches Martha and Snoop on their own weekly half-hour cooking talk show on VH1. The producer said, it's like they are a unit. That's why I think it feels so good because you have two people that genuinely love each other and respect each other for real.

And I couldn't agree with you more, producer lady, whose name I'm not going to say on purpose so that it makes you upset when you hear this episode about the show because you think I'm going to say your name. Stuart returns the favor by making Snoop drink. Snoop said she forces me to drink alcohol every day on the show with her. Yeah, he refers to her as the cocktail mistress. And she loves getting him drunk because she doesn't really, uh, drinks so much because when she was asked to you have a preferred cocktail, she said, I like

cocktails. I'm actually the cocktail mistress of the Martha and Snoop show. I make all the cocktails and I feed them to Snoop, who's not really a drinker, so he gets totally drunk off them. I make the best bourbon sour, the best margaritas, really good, soccatinis and Kier Royals. But I don't know how to say this.

Capirinas are my favorite drink. Kiperinas? Kiparhinahas. I'm not... That's it. Martha Stewart said the melting of cultures is what I want to see happen in the United States and so does Snoop. There shouldn't be any divides. There shouldn't be any question

that we all get together, that we can all get together and get along. Snoop in 2018 gets Martha's blessing and her dressing to release his own cook book from cook crook to cook. Martha said I really, I actually do like to watch

him cook. I mean he's so particular his little tiny bits of this and that and it all finally comes together just like it does for Martha. a resurgence of popularity. The first self-made billionaire female in America. Nuts. She did her time.

She did it like a champ. She ends up having a fantastic comeback. And her with Snoop is just the perfect situation. I hope they get old and die together. Whoa, Jesus Christ, man. I just want to see them live together. I want that reality show. I have to throw in.

They just actually, Martha has a new cooking competition show, I think on Food Network. Hell yeah. Called Martha's Bakeaway Camp and it's pretty great. All the contestants live in the yard in front of her house in tents. And then if they win houses, they do. And then if one of them wins the first leg of the show competition, they get to go inside her house and talk to her for a couple hours.

That's their reward. That's their reward. I love it. And the first episode, she rolls up on a giant horse, just like the biggest, like, what are this called, like Shetlands? She just disappears, like riding a horse. horse up and that has how she appears on their show. She only talks to

them in that one little section and the rest of the time she just is like this omnipresence like her company and they live in her yard with her horses. I love it. I think that she's really finally leaning in to being funny because again like I said the dude that works on her show like she is very funny. Yes.

And she enjoys connecting with people and I think that that is why I find her so interesting is that it's not the people like I feel like if she met me she wouldn't talk down to me but it's like the people that are on her level she would

that she's very upset to and also the people that work for her on the shows I know that she's not very nice too everybody in her life just everyone except everybody else didn't understand very nice but but I think on the show it's because she wants the show to be good and she's obsessed with being perfect and I mean she made

her whole life being obsessed with how do perfectly do all of the things that people don't do perfectly so of course she's a nightmare And I also, at the end of here, I just want to say about her, one of the things that inspires me a lot about her. And I strive for is she calls herself a late bloomer because she didn't really get whatever until her 40s and 50s. She's the 40s. I love that and I want to end that even calling that being a late bloomer because I think a lot of us, including especially women, they get sort of corralled into this idea of you have to figure shit out by 20 or 30 or even 40. And then you just, if you don't get it by then, then you just sort of exist for the next 50 years of your life, which is bullshit.

You should not think about your life that way. Your life is a long stretch out. You can live up to 100 now. Don't use the like first third of your life and then go like the rest of it's just whatever. You can be whatever you want. Hell you. You have time. Don't ever put those restrictions on yourself.

And I just want to end this episode by saying about Martha Stewart that J.C. P. God damn. Holden. Holden. What are we talking about? This has been our episode on Martha Stewart. Thank you so much for joining us.

Patreon.com for page 7 podcast for just $5 a month. You get bonus episodes, bonus material. Bonus everything. Okay, guys. It's so good.

Bonus kisses if you want. So you can follow us on page 7 LPN on Instagram and TikTok and me at the Natty Gene. We also have episodes of TrollVillup on the last podcast. YouTube for free. Shout us to Jeff

for the. the new art. We do have the new art. Love it. We have so far. We can follow his other stuff at Crude Inc. Yeah, and he got us all. He got little tips to all of us in the logo.

He got a really great job with our new logo. I got my little Twin Peak sigil in it. Yeah. Definitely check out. Please check out Crude Inc. on Instagram. Buy his stuff. He's great. Also, make sure to visit www.j.jinnacles.com.

because they're the biggest deals you're going to find a suit you love. She guarantees it. We can't say that because that's someone else's. That's a different word. I'll say, J.C. Nichols. Oh, God. Do you come?

Please. Perfect. Fantastic. Couldn't have said it better myself. Check me and Jackie out on our stream, Jack and E's on my Twitch channel, Twitch.tv.tv.com, slash hold nators ho.

Jackie, get us out of here. We love you guys. You follow me on Instagram by Jack That Worm. and we will talk to you next week. Bye. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors. You can support our shows by supporting them.

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