Page 7 - Riverdale Roundup Ch. 136: Riverdale, WTF

Episode Date: August 19, 2023

AS WE GO ON, WE REMEMBERALL THE TIMES WE HAD TOGETHERand one of those times will be August 30th on Ohnoitsjackie's Twitch at 5pm PST/8pm EST as we all gather round the screen to talk about our thoughts on the FINAL EPISODE OF RIVERDALE BAAAABY!!!AND AS OUR LIVES CHANGE, COME WHATEVERWE WILL STILL BE FRIENDS FOREVER Page 7 and Wizard and the Bruiser are going on TOUR! Dates and links to tickets at lastpodcastnetwork.com Support us on our Patreon page and get weekly bonus Patreon-exclusive content! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast Intro song by Green Dreams Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

It's time for more. Page 7 and Wizard and the Bruiser present. Release the Butthole Cut Tour coming to you in September and October. Where are we heading in September, Jackie? We're going on September 12th. We're going to Nashville. We're going on September 13th to Atlanta, Georgia. And then I'll go back to my hometown, September 14th of Tampa, Florida. In October, October 3rd, we're going to be in Detroit, Michigan.

October 4th. We're going to be in Columbus. And October 5th, we're going to be in Pittsburgh. K-7 and Wizard the Bruiser-Brusit Release the Butthole Cut Tour. You can find tickets at lastpodcastnetwork.com, baby. We remember all the times we've spent together. We will still be friends for us.

Oh my God, let that sample drop. It is the penultimate episode of Riverdale. It's your penultimate episode of Riverdale Roundup. Did I cry multiple times? The answer is yes. Yeah. This, I mean, I know that I've cried the last couple of episodes, not the last episode, but like there's been some peppered in there. And I haven't, you know, I've been struggling mentally fine.

And is that showing by how much I cry through Riverdale? Maybe. But this episode was worth it at least. Yeah, man, I am shocked by how much happened in this episode and how pleased I am. I'm very happy with what they did in this episode. And I, you know it, play the tape. I did not think that they were going to try to resolve anything. I thought that they were going to just be like, you know what?

It's too much. We're just going to let it be. And this was their effort to try to wrap up a lot of strings. And dare I say, in my opinion, I think they did it. I think that they are actually nailing the dismount here, Jackie. I think they might be. And I think that I don't know if this is Stockholm syndrome or what, or do we just need it so badly. And you know what I'm proud of us because, like, part of me, I've had this conversation with myself multiple times.

Like, am I going to hate it no matter what because it's the end? And you know how I feel about the endings of things? Like, am I just going to hate no matter what they choose? But after this episode, I'm not. I'm loving it. I'm loving everything they're doing. And even though, yes, I am mad about certain aspects of this, I am also very happy about many aspects of this. I think I'm going to go ahead and say I loved this episode, which is, I know we got some emails from people who did not like this episode.

But I think I might love it. Honestly, can I start with this real quick? Because Apes McNeil, I just want to say. I read your email like right before we were about to watch the episode and was like, oh, no, is this a horrible episode? Uh-huh. But in rereading Apes McNeil's email, they're not upset about that episode. They're angry about it was all a comic book because that means that, like,

Jughead has been writing all these horrible things happening to his friends for years. Uh-huh. So they're upset about that, which I understand about, like, him if it is all comic books. Okay. And also about angry about how how much KJ. Apo looked like an almost 30-year-old man instead of a junior in high school during the black and white episode. So I understand your ire. But also can we give a quick shout out to Apes McNeil's the child inside of them whose name is going to be Archer and you are going to call him Archie? Oh my God. I'm so excited for you, Apes McNeil. Congratulations.

Congrats, congrats. Oh my God, an Archie baby. It's a Riverdale baby. Riverdale will live forever. Yes. Just think of Archie. Oh, my God. Maybe you should consider the middle name Skeet.

It's a bit of a surprise. Oh, God. I don't know because then in our generation, Skeet also means something very different. I don't know if you want it, Gallum Skiy. Maybe not Skiet. Wow. Yeah.

So, okay, so I did also see Apes Big Neal's email. mail. And so I'm glad that there, Riverdale What the Fuck is a general Riverdale, what the fuck. Because honestly, you can always ask that question. Riverdale, what the fuck? It's a timeless question. And it's always an appropriate question. You could always say what the fuck. But I do, I loved this episode. Okay. And speaking of, it was all a comic book. Can I, can we just go ahead and say the basic elevator pitch of this, of what happens in this episode? We have not yet gotten to. You want to jump to the end already? I kind of feel like we have to in order for people to make sense of it all. I know that usually we try to go through what happens in the episode, but I kind of feel like we need to say the big idea of this episode at the beginning because we have to explore the big idea, Jackie. All right. Okay. Take it away, MJ. So we have not yet gotten to it was all a comic book or it will all become a comic book, which I think that is still what is going to happen. But in this episode, what we got was,

Okay, how do I put this? It's not yet. It was all a comic book. Well, the Guardian Angel of Riverdale comes back. And yes, Tabitha. The Guardian Angel of Riverdale comes back. And so it's not all a comic book, but it was all a TV show called Riverdale, right? So here's the thing.

So you said that, like, we haven't even gotten into, like, the Jughead writing the comic book. Is it that he wrote the television show and not? the comic book. I don't think that anyone wrote the television show. I think that Tabitha, the guardian angel of Riverdale, made the television show so that she could jog the memories of everybody who is in 1955. And what they watch in this episode to get their memories back is the television show Riverdale that we all just spent the seven years, what, the past seven years have you, okay, are you following us? Are you like, this is it, right?

I'm right, right, Jackie. That is what happened, right? You are right. She brings the television series of Riverdale. To them. To the characters of Riverdale, yes. She even brings like a color television, which they have not seen yet. Yes.

She brings in color television. Yes. And it has Jugheads narrations. narration as well. So it is Riverdale the television show. But what I love about it too is that she asks consent before she shows each one of them. And we'll get into that further. But I like that. She's like, do you want to know or do you not want to know? Okay. And I should have double-check. I believe I didn't double-check this before we started recording. I'm about to kick myself. But we see, we only see like the beginning of what she's showing everybody. But it's, it's clearly the show Riverdale.

But Jackie, do you happen to know, did you happen to double check? Is it the first episode of Riverdale that she's showing? I think it is. It has to be. I think it is. I mean, I'm pretty sure that it is. Like season one, episode one of, like she is, like you guys, if you're not watching Riverdale and you're just hearing us talk about it, literally the second to the last episode of the

series Riverdale relies on the premise that nobody in the series Riverdale remembers what happened in the series Riverdale. And so a character in Riverdale shows them the series Riverdale. And that is how we are ending. It starts the first episode of Riverdale ever starts with our stories about a town, a small town. And the people who live in the town. And yes, so they were showing the first episode of Riverdale's. I keep wanting to say Riverdale Roundup.

No, that's our show. Very different from Riverdale, the show. So you guys, it's even weirder than it was all a comic book. It was all a show. A television show? That needed to be made in order to show

a cast of characters in 1955 what actually happened to them before their memories were all wiped away. That's what the series, Riverdale, is. Do you think that it also shows them the time jumps? Do you think that, like, Everything. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Everything. It shows them everything. My favorite was when Jughead went to show Archie and he's like, this, my friend, is called binge watching. This is, it's gotten so meta. It's very meta. That it's become all meta.

Yes. Which I'm not mad about. I'm not mad. I'm so surprised how not mad I am. I just expected to be so angry by the time we got to whatever, however they were going to resolve this. And I can't believe how not angry I am. I think that it's great.

How much better, I mean, if it still also is going to be that Jughead then writes the comic books and it was all a comic book, then I'm also fine with that. And I still think that that's what's going to happen. But the fact that they made it so that the way they deal with this time jump, not to be confused with the other time jump, this 1955 time jump and the wiping of everybody's memories that they deal with it by then showing them. episode of Riverdale ever made in, but say, they're not saying this is a TV show called Riverdale. What Tabitha is saying is, this is just a montage I've made of everybody's memories, but it's, it also happens to be the TV show that is Riverdale. But then it does make sense that he is also going to become the writer of the Riverdale comics, because if you think about it, he also just turned the comet into a graphic novel as well. So I think that he's going to then

essentially transcribe the, which also throwing that out there for merch, if they turned the episodes of Riverdale into graphic novels, I would buy them. It would be great. I think I might be one of seven people that would buy them, but I would buy them. Yeah, I don't know if they're going to do that because I think that they have accurately assessed that the appetite for Riverdale is full. I think it's done. Yeah. But, but I, so, right, I think that the next, episode. Okay, so I think regarding him making the comet, the W.E.B. De Bois's short story into his, like, last comic book, right? I think, this is my prediction. I can't believe I'm making predictions on Riverdale Roundup. Who am I? My prediction is that that was their way of kind of maintaining Jughead's, you know, moral compass,

because in this episode, he makes the comic book he wants to make. It's banned by the comic, It doesn't meet the standards of the comic code. It's basically like a DIY. They put it out. The head of Pep Comics is like, this is my last rodeo. Yeah, Mr. Fieldsstone throws in the towel. Straight up is just like, all right, Pep Comics is done. Yeah, he's done.

He's done. I hope he's okay, actually. I'm a little bit worried about Mr. Fieldstone. But he's like, Juggest. Oh, he's dying. I think he definitely went to go into like a field to die. I think he's going to die of sadness somewhere. No, I feel like it's more.

just like after, you know, like a dog gets hit by a car and it crawls into like a pile of leaves so it can die in peace. I feel like that's what he's doing. Yeah, yeah. But, but, and so he's like, Jughead, write like the good buy, write the editorial note for this one. And so we get a nice Jughead monologue of like, this is what the Riverdale, this is what Mr. Featherhead had tried to do to us. They shut us down. Now the comics code is censoring everything, right? And so he got his last comic book, like his real good, good. comic book out in this episode. I still think, and if I'm wrong, I'm going to have to eat a hat because I was so sure I was right. But I think that in the next episode, there is still room for him to be like, well, I can't write the stuff I want to write because of the comics code. But what can I write under the comics code that abides by the comics code? Archie Comics, right? Which was actually fine with the comics code and how we got Archie Comics. And so I still think that he is going to write Riverdale in the next season. But what a pleasant surprise that it's, we don't have a lost thing where it all turned out to be a comic the whole time. I think he's going to write Riverdale

because he's been boxed out because of the comics code. He's been shut down from doing the kind of writing that he actually wants to do. So I don't think that that means he wrote the television series Riverdale. I think that it means that Tabitha, again, kind of used her angel powers, to like film edit. Somehow she like has all this footage and was able to make the television show Riverdale. And that's what. And so she's like Jughead, do you want to know? Do you want to know? Do you want? I'm not the real. I'm not the Tabitha who's touring the country with Emmett Till. I'm the Tabitha who's the Guardian Angel Riverdale. Jughead, you don't have any memories of this. Do you want to? And he's like, yes. She shows him. And then they're like, well, should we show everyone else? And she's like, well, we should let them decide. Which by the way, I feel like you're going to just show everyone a bunch of memories that they don't have and then be like you get to decide whether you want to know this or not.

They already know, Tabitha, you just showed them. And then the town of Riverdale collectively decides we don't want to know everything. We only want to know the good parts, which, Jackie, correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that extremely self-aware Riverdale of being like, we know that a lot of this shit was garbage? Bad.

But also a lot of it was good. I mean, remember when the line, when Juggets is the good? the bad, the bear. You know, like, it is such towards Archie. It is such a, it is so self-aware. And, I mean, they do ask if they want to even have the memories

in the first place before they show them. Yes. Because remember, like, only Archie wants to see it at first. And then Betty and Veronica are down to watch them, and they're just going to do it in a B&V way, even though still very, very angry, we didn't get to explore further their love line. I know. Just throwing that out there.

I know. mad about that. I really feel like we were tempted by such a juicy fruit. And it was stricken, talk about taking away our good memories. And then Cheryl and Titi want to see it. But then I don't understand why Reggie and Dilton want to watch it because I'm like, bros, you're not even the same person as you were in the beginning. Well, there was a really good line about that because he's talking to Reggie and Dilton. And he goes, you guys might not even recognize yourselves. You might even not even recognize yourselves. Because they were played by different actors. Self-aware Riverdale. And then the most satisfying of all, of course, is Clay doesn't want to

watch it because he wasn't in any of these memories, because he wasn't in any of the previous seasons. And of course, Julian does not want to watch it because he found out that in the past or the future or the memories or whatever, he was only a doll. And that's his reason for not watching. I do. I just want to give a shout out to Jane. Jane did write in. I appreciate it because Jane wrote us an email that like it's how I take notes while

watching Riverdale, but like Jane doesn't know this, but Jane like live wrote us an email as they were watching Riverdale, which I love. And my favorite was just what he said, oh my God, I'm sorry. But when Julian found out he was just a doll. In the previous life, it is the funniest thing I've maybe ever heard on Riverdale. And so funny. So that's the most resolution we get on that. Julian was the doll.

But that's confusing because I guess Julian was the doll. But also Julian, yes, Julian was the doll because we did know that because Julian was also the triplet who got absorbed by Cheryl in the womb. And then. But I thought that the whole thing was that it was her mother. living in the walls moving the doll around. Yes, I think that's also true. But I think Julian was also the doll. But that was his only representation. I think, right, I think that's right. Not to be confused, I actually thought that that doll was JJ, not Julian. But I trust the Riverdale writers a little bit that they remember what happened in the past more than I do. Way more than us.

I mean, I certainly woke up Jeff this morning and was like, did the comet come up before in or am I crazy? And he's just like, what are you talking about? I was like, was this the first time that W.B. Du Bois's the comet? Was this the first time it was brought up in Riverdale? Because I remember looking it up the last time. It happened earlier the season. Right? This is that. Okay. Okay. I know that we've talked about him before, but I didn't know if we specifically talked about the comet. Yes, because, because it was when we were doing all of the like interracial marriage stuff with, um, with, with, Brad Rayberry's spouse. Yes. And Tabith, that was before Tabitha had fucked off. Yes. And she and Jughead were like, we are also in an interracial relationship. Yeah.

So Julian finds out that he was a doll. Clay finds out that he just like wasn't there. So, but, and so they decide that they're just going to watch the good. They just want the good memories. But Betty decides that she wants. wants all the memories. Betty and Jughead are the only ones that want all of the memories. They don't want just the good.

Because of course she does because she's dark Betty. She's dark Betty. She's not, she's not her full self without her dark memories. Oh my God. When she was like, my father was a killer. I know. So that's the only resolution we get on hell. Like he, in 1955, he's just a cheater.

But then she finds out that he was a serial killer. and that's kind of the only resolution we get. I think that the two, I think, so there's also two, just to put this on the board so that we don't forget, we have to talk about the entire Alice and Betty stuff in this episode. And we have to talk about Uncle Daddy. Oh, yeah. I just still, I loved Archie's, like,

when he was just like, I was a boxer, a prisoner, a football player. I was a soldier like my dad, like just the way that he talked about. I was like, man, you were all those things. When they were even just showing the beginning of Riverdale, I'm like, man, remember back when he played football? Like, I just, I feel like I'm going through, which I think is a great, like, part of the reason why I love this storyline is it does do the, as we go on. Yes. We, like, it really is, like, I feel like I am ending high school graduate. Like, we are all seniors.

This is all the end, like, like remember all the good times. but you have to remember the bad times too. That's why they're nailing the dismount. Like, I, they have, it, to reckon with everything Riverdale has done in the last seven years is such a monumental task that is actually impossible unless you transcend the limits of time and space, I think, which is why now it makes sense that this is what they had to do. Yes.

Like they, they had to be, of course it had to be an angel. It had, they had to go back to 1955. In retrospect, this is what had to happen. There was no other way to end this series. And now everybody gets to learn about what happened. They get to all learn who they fucked and who they sucked and who they hated and who was a killer. And they are, it is extremely self-aware Riverdale. They're like, can we just have the good memories without all the gargoyles?

And I'm so glad you wrote down all the lines. There were so many, so many good, good lines. Oh, my God. My father was a killer. My sister was murdered and then came back to Lodewil. Oh my God. And then when Veronica was like, and they killed my husband, Chad and my father. So that is the big thing that happens in this episode. They all...

Speaking of memories, I just want to give shoutouts to the people that did write in about Benjamin Button. Because I'm throwing it out there. I did say I'm pretty sure he's the one that threw himself out the window during the gargoyoking thing. And I was right. I'm just saying. I did say that. I was right. But also, apparently Ethel has dated Benjamin Button in the past, but that was during the Gryphins and Gargoyles thing, but she was dating him in the game and not in real life. Oh, yes. But she, like, still saw him as that. Yes.

And I also want to give a shout out to Teague, who brought up, which I completely forgot about, that Benjamin Button was also another teenage. that Ms. Grundy was having, I don't want to call a licit affair, was abusing, was assaulting. Another child that she was assaulting was Benjamin Button before Archie. Yes, yes. She was a serial child abuser. Thank you, Teage. Yes. Yeah, I can't believe that.

So we were so wrong about Ben Button being a new character. But still, still, I think that Ethel should have. done, should have gotten better than some guy who we haven't heard about for years. But that, okay, so, so, so that's what is the big, big, big thing of this episode, handled, I would say absolutely excellently. There was also, I mean, the act, this is a thing, Archie acts the fuck out. There's, there's no, like, winking at the camera when it comes to these actors. Jughead a little bit. Jugg had, Cull Sprow seems to know that this show is stupid, and it kind of comes through in the way that he acts.

I just wanted to say, can we also just bring up how amazingly hot Jughead looked, when he, especially after he, like, started getting the memories back? I was just like, how is he getting hotter as this episode goes on? I know. I was so mad about it. I know. I remain very upset about how attractive he is in the season. And also, by the way, he was even attractive in the flashbacks.

They were playing all these old clips from earlier in the seasons. And I was like, fuck, I didn't even think he was attractive then, but I think he's attractive now back then. I know. I know. But to what you said about Archie's light of like, I was a soldier in the army. The thing that's so fun about KJ. Apa is that he's just like,

I'm just going to act like, I'm just going to act this as if my life depends on it. He is like not, he's completely committed to the Archie character. And the acting between Betty and Alice in this episode is like they just, just randomly insert this incredibly moving little microplot between, I mean, it's not random, it's a resolution of what was going on between Betty and Alice this whole season. But there's like this whole reckoning between them at the beginning of the episode where Betty, this is before Tabitha comes back, before they get their memories back. But Betty is just like, you know, mom, like dad cheated on you. He's living in the basement now, which I think maybe that happened

in previous seasons. They sent Hal to live in the basement. Lord knows what he does in the basement. Hal's been banished to the basement because of the memories, I guess, that were brought up by Ethel realizing that she's his child. But Alice is, like, devastated. And she's like, you know, what is my life? Like I, and Betty's like, why didn't you leave him? And she's like, well, I didn't, I'm a woman in 1955.

I had never lived by myself. I lived with my parents. She's like, I can't even open a bank account. How was she supposed to? Yeah. How was she supposed to leave him? leave. What is she supposed to do? Yeah. And they just and and and you know, Betty's like, but you had dreams and Alice is like, yeah, I did, but like I had a family instead and like it would like,

look what it got me. And they have this like pretty devastating kind of like. That scene. Yeah. Like this kind of existential, um, reckoning about what Alice has done with her life. And Betty asks her to read her book, The Teenage Mystique, and she handles it in a very Alice way of being like, oh, ha ha, I am not going to do that. But then she does read it. And then she comes to Betty and is just like, I'm really proud of you. Another moving scene. Like Betty's asleep. I'm about to cry when I'm talking about it. I know. And she was just like sitting at the edge of the bed and they just had this like just really

beautifully done scene together just talking about where she's like, she's so proud of Betty and like and just like for what she is and and it's I was so into I got so into it. Yeah. I know it's it is a really they those two really acted the fuck out of this entire series without ever. Lily Reinhart is never like winking at the camera like isn't this such a dumb show like she is just like I will be Betty Cooper.

She is just such a good actor, no matter how stupid the show has been. She has always acted her ass off and now is able to come full circle with like a really, really good final season. And it was very satisfying. And then, yeah, the other thing that we absolutely must talk about, people have rightfully been dropping us notes that Riverdale Roundup has been predicting a lot. And this one does not come from us. This came from a listener about Uncle Daddy. Wow.

I should go back. I need to. The problem is we just have. so many Riverdale emails. I want to find who said this to us. The one from last week. We shouted them out last week, but I am sure that we can find it again. But Jackie, while you are looking, I will give the people a reminder of what was pretty good last week, and then I will talk about what happened this week. Last week, and a listener who Jackie is about to find their name right now, they emailed and said, what if, I think Corey, does Corey ring a bell, Jackie? It is.

Corey said, Corey, Corey, Corey. Everyone put what, put down whatever's in your hands and give a round of applause for Corey, who predicted maybe Uncle Daddy's extremely insecure masculinity has to do with him being a closeted gay man who was partnered with Fred Andrews. And Mary Andrews had kind of knew that that was what was going on. and that's why he came to live in their house after Fred died. Great theory. Right.

And that that explains his closeted homosexuality explains why he is so aggressively like policing Archie's not even, Archie's not even really queer curious in this season except for one very good episode. But he obviously likes poetry. And except for one scene in this episode, which we are going to talk about because I also, Jeff and I both cried during that scene. During the scene between him and Reggie.

Oh my God. I know. Again, talk about acting, man. They are just committed. They are just like, we're going to act like, act this is like it's fucking Shakespeare. But so what happens in this episode? But who is it who even goes to? Oh, it's Kevin, right? Kevin goes to his dad's house. Yes. Sheriff Keller's house. And Sheriff Keller opens the door looking frazzled. And we are, we are meant to assume that it's just because he's like a divorced dad and he's got big divorced dad energy. And then what happens? A shirt. wet uncle daddy steps out of the shower. She's so wet. He was so wet. He is fucking Sheriff Keller. He's fucking Sheriff Keller guys. Uncle Daddy and Sheriff Keller are having sex with each other because he said in the

last episode that he's moving in with Sheriff Keller. And I didn't understand why he didn't just say that when Kevin came to the house. Why didn't he didn't just say like, oh, I'm crashing. here for a while, but instead Uncle Daddy was like, my shower was on the fritz and I had to shower here. Can I just say the biggest travesty of this episode is that we didn't get to see one stolen kiss betwixt them? I know. I need. I need.

But it also makes complete sense of why Sheriff Keller, remember, we were so upset with how he reacted when he, he, he knows that his son is gay. And remember that episode where he was just sitting there with the whiskey glass in the dark just like so angry about Kevin? But that also makes sense and it also redeems his guy.

I mean, it doesn't redeem because you shouldn't act like that anyway, but like it makes more sense. It makes more sense. And technically, everything Corey predicted did not technically explicitly get said because we don't know for sure

that Uncle Daddy is not Fred's brother and is an active lover. I think he might actually be Fred's brother. Might be Fred's brother. But He is gay, and that's the point. He's gay. And you know who else is almost gay?

Archie and Reggie again. So the whole thing with Reggie is that Reggie got into this very prestigious basketball summer camp that's going to, like, set up his career. And this whole episode, which will go into Archie's journey during this, is that he wants to be Jack Kerouac. And he wants to hit the rails, which I was, I also was this person. a teenager, so I think that's why I'm so, but it's just like, Archie, we get it. You read Howl. Yes, but I was so, I was exactly like this. I read Howl and I was like, I'm a beat now. Yeah. That's what Archie's doing. Did you take to the rails? I, he's taking to the rails. I wanted to take to the rails. Oh my God. He's so obnoxious and so he's like, I'm going to take to the rails.

And then Reggie is like, and you know what, Jackie, this comes full circle because you got your goose a corn costume and you said, is it, is there, is there, Is August an appropriate time to get a corn costume for the goose? I asked the Midwesterner in my life, MJ. And I grew up in corn country and I said, yes, August is a great time to put a corn outfit on your goose because August is when all the corn gets harvested. It's a great time to eat fresh corn. And you know what? It's true. Because at Duck Creek, where Reggie's family's farm is, they have one week of corn harvesting that pays for their entire farm for a year.

year. And so they need him to not go to the basketball camp, but to come back and help harvest the corn that week. And he's like, I can't do it. And like Archie like happens upon him. He's just crying on the steps because of what, because he can't go to his basketball camp. And Archie is telling everyone he's going to ride the rails. He got that communist teacher hired back because, oh, also he got Mrs. Thornton back. Because Mr. Weatherby, the actual principal of Riverdale for all the previous seasons, gets hired as the principal because Mr. Featherhead gets exposed as in on the communist plot that the Blossom parents were leading. He was working with the Russian spies, so they had to get rid of him. And then, which also, they go to Dr. Wurthers. And Dr. Wurthers, because they're like, oh, God, is Dr. Wurther's about to

become the principal? Because everyone hates Dr. Wurther's as well. We know that he's really bad. But no, he's going to Washington to go, like, work on the, like, the scruples of teenagers. Yeah, he's going to do, he's going to work on, like, juvenile delinquency, which is a nice, I guess, little nod to, I don't know, uh, whatever cultural, um, there was, like, 1950s was a big time for a lot of juvenile delinquent panic. So I guess that was kind of a reference to that. And so then, yeah, T.T is like, I know this, like, fantastic black education. who's been like boxed out of being like an educational leader because he's a black man and it turns out it's Mr. Weatherby. So Mr. Weatherby comes back, reinstates the teacher, the English teacher that was fired for being a communist. Hopefully that means that Ms. Grundy, secret pedophile has been, you know,

kicked to the curb, but they don't really address that. And so anyway, Archie's telling everybody he's going to ride the rails. He's got to have some real life experiences. And then, okay, this is a really sweet seen, but also, if I was Reggie, I might have wanted to punch Archie in the face because Archie's like, I can just go live your stupid life for a week. He's like, oh, I can be on a farm. He doesn't say stupid. No, he doesn't. But it's the implication, okay? Everybody thinks people who live in farm country are basic, you know, kind of simple-minded people. And he's like, I can, I can live on land. I can break bread with your parents. And I'm, it's fine. But I just feel like, He's kind of condescending about it, don't you think?

He's like, I can get real life experience. I was too busy crying. I could get life experience. But like, if someone told you like, I can get life experience, I was going to ride the rails because I haven't lived enough life. But instead, I will just like live at your parents' house for a week. And that will be so, like, bizarre that that will provide enough fuel for me to write the next howl.

I just feel like it's a little bit of a backhanded compliment to Reggie is all I'm saying. I see where you're coming from, but that's not how I took it. But I do completely understand what you're coming from. You just took it as a very loving scene between the two of them and he's like, I'll do it for you. Just because KJ. Appa and Archie is just so like, hey guys. Totally. No, I'm hopeful. Like, this is a great idea.

Totally. I don't even think that he could ever be. I don't know if Archie's, like, if he ever gave a backhand and handed compliment, I don't think he'd understand why someone was upset. about it. You know what I mean? No, no, totally. Listen, this might be the Iowan in me talking who like whenever, whenever I move, whenever I tell people in New York

City that I'm from Iowa, people say, how did you get here as if, like, how did you learn about New York City? You're like, I walked and I kicked a tin can the entire time. Exactly. I'm like, we have cars, we have the internet, we learn about things. So there was just a, I just thought it was somebody that he was like, oh, instead of

riding the rails, I'll just live your stupid. week. Fuck life. How dumb your life is. But actually it's very sweet. But like the way Reggie takes it. And Reggie's just like, oh my God, you would do that for me?

Yeah. Yeah. So he's going to give up his plans to help him. He hugs him and he says like, I love you, Archie. And he's like, I love you too, Reg. And they just like hug each other. And there's just this like, I don't know. I think that I was just getting caught up in the feelings of like, man.

Because like in 1955, that conversation would have been, like you would never have ended in I love you. Like there is such like, like the sharing of emotions of two teenage boys is already something that like, like now the, like the current generation, like the young generation is doing that. But like it was even difficult in our generation to see teen boys connecting like that.

Totally. And although that actually is kind of also like a caroac thing, right? Like caro, when I read on the road, I was like, Oh my God, this is a book about men loving each other. Yes. Sometimes in a sexual way and sometimes in a non-sexual way. And so it's like, yeah.

So he's like, Archie's just reading a bunch of beat poetry and telling his male peers that he loves them. And it's great. This is exactly what happened. I paused the episode and I was like, like, because I was like, no, this is just like, you know, a whole carouac thing of like, why do I have to push that? Like, oh, they're going to start kissing.

Oh, they're going to start kissing. And it's like, no, man, this is just love between bros. It must be love between bros. And that's awesome, too. Carrawak was the poster child of love between bros. Love between bros. Sometimes we kiss them too, and that's okay. Oh, yes, please.

Please kiss. If you both want to kiss, please be kissing. You know, I'm always pro-kissing. That was a very, very sweet scene. And it was they did a lot of great character development between Reggie and Archie this season. It ended up being very, very satisfying. Except for when they were watching the beauty pageant,

that was very out of character, kind of. Although they were in their horny time. period. Yeah. So, I mean, so I think we covered most of it. It's the series Riverdale, guys. The series Riverdale is their memories. That's how they get their memories back. Yes. I can't get over it. Well, Cheryl finally also got the Vixens back to. She came in and she, like, I also am intrigued because now, I mean, I'm not going to watch it again. But like, how much there have been scenes that have mirrored things that happen in the first season, I find very interesting. because, like, she also, didn't she, like, put it to, I think it was Veronica? Didn't she have, like, a dance off with Veronica in the first season? There's definitely been this exact same scene before where Cheryl had to dance her way back into the vixons. I can't remember the specifics. We'll blame my brain for that.

We need the Jeff brain coming in. Yes. But I think that that scene, this was a scene that we have seen before, but in, like, a satisfying way. It wasn't like, oh, Riverdale, you did this already. It was like, yeah, we're doing it again. She has to, like, audition her way back in to, by the way, Evelyn Evernever, who is still there, and they have never, I wish that there had been a little bit of an Edgar Ever Never memory that had, just for a little, just for us, the lulls, you know, because she's been around this whole season.

They have never acknowledged the fact that she is the child of an Oregon harvesting cult leader. And also secretly, like, in her 40s? Secretly in her 40s. No, in this season, she's just a racist and a homophobic. Oh my God, when Principal Weatherby was giving that, like, beautiful speech up on the stage, and she, like, didn't want to stand to clap. Yeah. I was like, man, they got to throw that in there just so you remember how much you fucking hate Evelyn ever and ever.

Yep. She was a racist homophob. She's not an organ harvester. But she was heading up the vixons because Cheryl got kicked or had to leave the vixons for, I already can't remember. it had to do with protecting the what was going on with T.T. and Clay a couple of episodes ago. But in any case, she dances her ass off and it's a fantastic. Any time we have a cheerleading dance off in Riverdale throughout all seven seasons, it has always been good. Always good. Absolutely always here for it. And she did openly say, and I'm in love with, I'm going steady with Tony Topaz. Yeah, she came out. And then there were, she came out and then two girls in the victim.

And they're like, well, then we want to stand out in the light too. They said, we want to live in the light. We want to live in the light. Oh, my God. There's a lot of moments to cry at in this episode. It actually was a really, really good episode. And so speaking of what's left in the future, I just want to give one episode left. Shout out to, I want to give a quick shout out to Gary.

Gary wrote in which I loved, like all of their feelings about these last two episodes. So this was before this episode came out and also killed almost all of their predictions. I was just like, yes, yes, this happened. Yes, this happened. And it was just amazing. So shout outs to Gary. Hopefully this will end the way you want it to end. And I do also just love bringing out the idea because like, essentially,

Essentially, Gary was talking about how, like, well, we wanted it to be more like the schlocky, older Riverdale. And we got a little bit of that in a couple of episodes ago with, like, the melting man and everything like that. Right. But essentially, they were saying that, like, you know, the bigger issues were like the, you know, social justice and identity politics that were, you know, obviously that was the much bigger thing. And also the fact that, like, I didn't even think about, even Alice's villainy, because talking about, like, the villains's season have. fairly consistently been old straight white conservative men instigating moral panics to distract from their own corruption and to hinder progress in the interest of maintaining their own power and privilege. And I'm here for that ever relevant criticism. Even Alice's villainy this season

was an overcompensation to deny slash cover up for Hal's past misconduct. I think this season will be remembered fondly by those of us who are politically progressive and found some of the earlier seasons a bit too silly, chaotic and lacking in purpose at all times, albeit very fun. Absolutely. Absolutely. But also, Gary thinks that there's going to be a resolution for Fangs and Midge. Do you think we are going to get a resolution next episode? What are we going to get next episode?

I hope so. We haven't heard from Midge in a while. She is still at the Sisters of Quiet Mercy. She's still in the Sisters of Quiet Mercy. We got to get her out. I hope they burned that place down in the last episode, honestly. Please. I hope there's a kind of like French Revolution.

style storming of the gates of the Sisters of Quiet Mercy and that they free everyone. I actually think that maybe has happened in the past in Riverdale because they did free all the kids there once. So that has happened. As I'm talking about it, I'm realizing it's already happened. They released all the orphans into the forest. Yes, into the, yes, of course. How could I forget? Into the woods. But do we have any more emails that we need to shout out before we talk about what's next for us and what's next for Riverdale? No, not for right now. But also I did Speaking of things that had come back around, Caitlin did remind us that when Cheryl said,

you did a bad thing, Daddy. Cheryl actually said this line in the show before. In season one, right after she found out that Clifford killed JJ, Cheryl walks into the dining room and says the exact line. This show is doing some strange time looping, and I think it all has to do with it coming back around. And especially like, so like they didn't remember the memories,

but the memories live inside of them. And so this stuff is, eking out in reality. This is great writing. I want to see the like murder board, like writing board that they have in the Riverdale writers room. I really do because they must be like, these are the lines we want to bring back or these are the moments we want to harken back to.

Like the conversation, I really want to watch the conversation between the Riverdale writers where they're like, okay, in the like memories montage, which memories are we going to name, you know, because obviously so many things happened. They do talk about the gargoyle. They talk about the, I don't think they said time jump, but they brought, you know, they mentioned some, they mentioned the ghoulies and all of that. But so, all right, this was the penultimate. Next week is the last episode of Riverdale. Ever.

Next week is also a network ever, ever, I know. Next week is a network break. We cannot put out an episode because all the great, wonderful editors here at the network will be on much. needed time off. So Jackie and I have a little plan for you. We think you might like it. So on the 30th of August, the 30th of August, guys, all right? M.J. and I are going to, we are going to watch Riverdale together and record the final episode as we're watching the episode. But I can't do all of this at once. And since like we don't have any help from anybody else, we want to do right after we watch the episode.

We're going to do a Twitch stream together and invite you to come and sit Shiva for Riverdale with us. August 30th, Twitch.tv. slash, oh, no, it's Jackie. Twitch.tv slash, oh, no, it's Jackie. We are going to do a stream at 5 p.m. Pacific Standard Time, 8 p.m. Pacific Standard Time. If you don't, if you're not writing this down,

let's say you're driving right now, we are going, I'm going to make a little like ad for it. So we're going to be putting it up on both of our Instagram. So just go to Jack That Worm or go to MJKLCat and we will have the information up there because I can't wait weeks for this episode to come out. Yeah. I can't do it. We don't want to.

It's bad enough that the last episode will happen during a vacation weekend and we can't do anything that next week when it airs because my family is also. on vacation and it's just, there's just too much, too much going on. So everyone's going to watch Riverdale on their own time. You don't have to watch it live with us. We can also, copyright stuff, whatever. So everyone's going to watch Riverdale in their own time. And then we will all gather together the following week, the when we would have otherwise been watching Riverdale. And instead, on Wednesday, because it airs Wednesday, but we won't be watching Riverdale. We will be thinking about the good times, thinking about the bad times, thinking about

We're just going to talk about Riverdale. You can bring your favorite Riverdale things. You can bring, we can just, we'll just talk. Let's just talk together about Riverdale. And really, we have to put it in its little bed. We have to put it to sleep. It's going to sleep forever. And we'll talk about what we feel. It's going to a farm up state. And we will talk about it. And so that is how we. I think Jeff is going to join us for a while, which will be great. This is great because he remembers things that Jackie and I don't remember. I just don't remember. And thank you guys.

Thank you guys for going with us on this journey. And next time you hear from us, we'll be live over on Twitch. dot TV forward slash, oh, no, it's Jackie. 5 p.m. Pacific Standard Time, 8 p.m. Eastern Standard Time. August 30th. Let's talk about what we think. I'm very excited for us. The series is the memories, you guys.

And also, it's probably all about to become a comic box. My God. My God. I can't believe that it's ending and I, we have to end this episode, but I just can't believe that all of it is ending. But we don't want to. No, we don't want to. We don't want to because we hate endings.

So, you know, an ending is really just the beginning of something else. And we don't know what that means for us yet here at Riverdale Roundup, but we will figure it out. Don't worry. Yes, we certainly will. We're not going anywhere. And also page seven's not going anywhere. So you can always get your fill.

Come find us. Yes. And if you need, if you need, if you need, if you need. if you like your little Jackie and MJ talk about TV time, you know, we're scheming. We'll come up with something. Don't you worry. We're scheming. We're scheming. We'll see you guys on Wednesday, August 30th,

and until then, it's time for the rid of the day around up. We're going to kiss them all. Bye, everybody. Bye. This show is made possible by listeners like you.

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