Page 7 - Second Helpings - And I Took That Personally

Episode Date: October 10, 2025

This week Jackie and MJ are joined by LPN's own TAYporter, Holden McNeely, who despite the sheen of sweat across their head, remain wrapped in their Taylor Swift Fartigan, as he gives his thoughts on "The Life of a Showgirl" and he's ready to throwdown! Then it's on to "KPOP DEMON HUNTERS" and Bad Bunny killin' on SNL in a very emotional way, after that Holden slithers off wrapped in his sweat soaked fartigan so MJ and Jackie can get on to HILARIA gettin' booted from DWTS, and Andy Richters gettin' showered in backhanded compliments, plus even more on this week's Second Helpings! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast  Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

So if I took it up right now, Jack it would pass out from the flume. Yeah, don't do that to me. From the flume. From the flume. Hush, hold, but we have to sing the song. Yeah. Keep your fart again to yourself. It's not that song.

You think it's for a never. All right. MJ. I roll it too. Don't worry. Five a second time around. Or is it gonna be Elizabeth. forever.

Man, I don't know the lyrics yet. Give a man if I can have you. Yes, we are so it's very, I think everybody is getting a little bit of a, you know, spinning top.

We told everybody that Holden McNeely, welcome, Holden McNeely was going to be joined us for second helpings because we had Natalie on during our regular, you know, don't say that just because she's not a Swifty. We had,

I'm not saying anti-Swifty. We just had non-Swifty Natalie Jean on during the week seven. Sounds like a woman that's married to an idiot. Well, that would be the case. But we're not talking about her poor life choices, except for the fact that she chooses to never, ever listen to Taylor Swift. But of course, last week, for those of you that have been living under a rock, life as a showgirl, life of a showgirl, life of a showgirl, life of a showgirl.

How dare you? I'm sorry. Strike number one for Jackie. I'm sorry. You can't say strike number one because I see strike number nine because you're sitting here. Holden referred to it as his fart again before we started recording. I hope we leave that audio in. Because he was farting into his cardigan.

And yeah, the Tay cardigan that he is wearing, he's already starting to have a sheen of sweat upon his brow. Absolutely. But I have to wear it. This is the life of his show. Girl official cardigan. It has stars on the sleeve. It does have stars. He has embroidered on the tit. I need the listeners to know that hold the, so, you know, I'm on Zoom. I'm, but Holden and Jackie are in the room together. And so, you know, so I'm, I'm on the Zoom with Jackie, just the two of us. And then Holden walks in the room. Jackie looks up and says, oh, okay. And then Holden walks over into the Zoom window. And he just has the biggest smile on his face, you get. He's like a five-year-old who has dressed themselves for kindergarten and comes to that. It's a beautiful, it's a beautiful sparkling. It is so sparkly.

Cardigan. It's like so many glitter strands. It's orange. Orange is my color. My girl finally chose orange for her era color. That is my favorite color. He had to have the cardigan. Everyone knows it.

She knows it. My wife purchased this cardigan for me. Yes. That's love. As a gift as well. That's nice. How does Lexi feel buying Taylor Swift merchandise for you? There's a bit of, let's just call it, because,

sometimes people can be petty even my own wife. Let's call it jealousy. Wow. And she's not even here to defend herself. I guess I'll line this for you. Is it like one of those? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I guess I'll support this absolute pure,

delicious love that you have with a situation, let's just call it outside of yourself. Because I understand, this is, I have no actual relationship with Taylor, though I was in a room with her at the SNL after party's feet from her. You were in a room with her. Okay, so I have gotten closer to her than I think. think many of you, I'm going to say slugs listening to this right now.

Good, good, good, good. This is why we bring him back to visit for you to remember. Yeah, every time you're like, where's all that? Where's all it? Here he is. There you go. And I'm eating a toast of it. Let's just get it out in the open, okay?

Because, you know, I'm sitting here in a fucking vortex since this album came out. Also, you're welcome for giving you this space. Thank you, because this is really kind of the only place I've had to talk about this. Can't do it on nerd of mouth. Not really. I tried to talk about it a little bit on our like Patreon, but I was like, just wait, just wait. I'm going to talk about this on page seven. But also I will say, don't worry, Holden and I did have a great jacking episode the day after the Tay drop.

Yeah. But it's so funny because Holden was already so angry. And right of how people. We're taking Taylor Swift. He gets so excited for the album to come out. He's excited for months. And then it comes out. Everyone shifts on it immediately.

And so mad. I, like, got ahead of it this time. I came in hot. I was, and as soon as someone said it, he'd be negative up, like, you're a fucking idiot. Shut up. And it actually worked. People got really bousy. I was trying to come in, like, Holden, hey, maybe we should not come in as defensive.

And maybe it won't spurn as much ironed. He's like, like, like a toddler screaming. Yeah. Yeah. But I was either screaming about that. or Travis's big throbbing. We're going to talk about how hog wild you were in a moment. Hog wild did.

Well, just I remember now we've gone through several cycles of this. It happened for midnights and it happened for the Tortured Poets Department. And was there one in between those two? I don't think so. No. How dare you? First of all, yeah, let's just make me mad immediately. No, MJ.

But everyone should. That's insane to ask that. Everyone should. I just love it. It's like, MJ's like, how long. was the asylum I was built in what I've been fucking shoved into. It's been years, MJ.

Yeah, it's been years of it. But I will say that I think people were wrong about Midnights and Torture Proits Department being bad. I thought both of those are good albums that, like, held up. Well, I would say Midnights, this is the weird thing I'm dealing with. I feel like Midnights was actually pretty celebrated.

I liked Midnights. I think people, and also, it got like a pretty... Maybe people were just mean to you, but it was a critic. I think they're always mean to him. But, like, Midnights got a pretty, in terms of that, because we're talking, like, worldwide reaction, right? It got pretty positive perception. This is a worldwide.

We're talking about people. Tortured Poets Department came out. And, yeah, exactly. In my own, like, crew, there were a lot of dissenters because it's not the most, like, this album album, which we'll get into it a second. Also, like, we'll say with Tortured Poets Department, it came out in, like, April. And I think that if that album had dropped more at this time of year, it's not a summer album. It's not a summer album.

It's more of a moodier. It's an autumn album. It's a put on a fucking cardigan. It's all cozy. It's kind of a dead of winter album. But I dig the Evermore, the folklore. I dig the tortured. I like that layer.

But Holden has been screaming ever since I think his large cock entered into Taylor. The arena, yeah. Holden has been. She's what I call her body. The arena. The arena. The arena. And he put its comments.

in it or on her body. I wonder if he refers to her as an arena as well. Maybe that's what he needs. Your body is a ball arena. It's like John Mayer. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, put my balls in it. I don't think he's putting his balls in his balls. Why do you say that? We're not getting jamey. Maybe that's where she likes him. Maybe she likes him up there like she's the squirrel and he's hiding the nuts. Okay. MJ, do you think Travis is inserting also his balls into her vagina? Which, by the way, people would be like, that's intrusive. She wrote a song about his coffee. I think we can talk about their gym. Well, I don't know if that means you just opening her up for harassment, but I think if he was putting his balls in there, we would have gotten a song about it.

I think we know for sure that. Bowls between my eyes. Put it in my arena like your football. I fucking love it, dude. Yeah, honestly, yeah, you're right. I'll take a whole album about his dick, dude. But Holden has been screaming that he wants the I'm fucking a football player. album and that's what this album is. There's a couple things going on here because let's just lay it out on

the table right now. Lay it out hold it. If you're just on Reddit and like pitchfork or whatever it is. We understand but you got to get out of it. We got to get out there. If if you're just on that stuff, this album is the worst album of the year. This album is horrible and we everyone's in loving that. And literally I've had random people including a staff member here, which will not go named, but I have started sabotaging some of her work to get her fired. Kelly. Is it Kelly? She put a bad album out or whatever, right?

And I'm like, I know you have not listened to this album. But everyone is just now assumed it's just a bad album based on what the internet's saying, right? That happened very fast. By like Friday afternoon. Oh, because it was like a parade. It was like, yay, she put out of bad. Everyone was like, so many people are weirdly thrilled. I say weirdly, but I have to acknowledge a couple.

things right now. Acknowledge him, Holden. This is the space. In 2025, you girl boss too close of the sun. It's hard to be like, yay, a billionaire's things. It is. It is hard to do that. Especially with the like, and I will say I appreciate we got some comments because

on page seven with Natalie, we were talking a little bit about the whole like, oh, you have to have four different physical CDs so that people can get all eight of your extra acoustic songs. I think that's a little bullshit. But other people have said in the comments that we're receiving about our last episode that they got used to that and the multiple releases from, that's more of like an international artist. It's like with other artists and other places of doing things like that.

That it's more of a, it is a practice custom, just not so much in America. I think it's just here, especially like you said in 2025, nobody's got any money. Everybody's upset. it is hard to wrap your brain around. But at that point, it's like, well, I think in that, it's like, she's not forcing you to buy it. Right. And it's, yeah, that's my thing with that. I was going to say, like, I think that's a fun, like, hey, get which one you want it.

Get which one you want. And I think it'd be a little different if we don't live in the era of streaming. We're like, we're easily going to get those songs, like online. Like, I don't need to go get these CDs to acquire these songs at some point. You know what I mean? Just the whole like, you know, and I'm going to throw this out, which is good we're having this discussion. Sure. I feel like it adds to, and I know that it's not, but I think it's just because it's Taylor Swift, it adds to like the, I feel a little bit of her mean girl miss.

I think it's like a little bit of her, or a little bit of her meat, because I feel like, and something that we did talk about with chat, that there's a lot of, poor me, poor me, everybody puts all these bars of me, poor me, poor me. But then there is also this little like, or if you want to be exclusive and have my card again and have all four of my CDs. Adam, can you hold me down? All right, yeah, come at me. Adam's coming in. Why are you in Adam in? I'm going to hurt a bit. It's so tough.

I do find this very hard because I'm like, I don't, it's like even the billionaire thing. Lay out like, Travis is big fat fucking talk. You would have suck on it. MJ, you should have seen. He was cock crazy on Friday. We kept calling him Hogwild, cock crazy McNeely, because he can't stop thinking about how throbbing. And also, I will say, how much you want to look at, touch, pump, Travis Kelsey's penis.

I keep having this dream where I am Taylor Swift's vagina. The arena, please. I call it, it's a respectful name. Glistening. And I just see this football helmet, fleshy football helmet, kind of head towards. Oh, trying to back through our fucking boundaries. I receive you. I receive you, you know?

Yeah. I'm surprised that's not what Wood was called. Yeah, I receive you. Yeah. Or tied in. Yeah. I can never give it to you. I can only receive you.

Like that's in parentheses. I can only receive you. Tot, dot, dot. A love story. This is me. Yes. Now. I think that you have realistic expectations of Taylor, which I think sometimes when people, like, yes,

she is a billionaire. And, you know, people, I think, point out that, you know, that she's, I'm not going to use the word vapid, but that like there's a little bit of navel gazing going on a little bit of Biden. Why, Adam in? He's trying to get through the Zoom screen. Holden, M.G's not here in person.

You cannot go after that. It's not that. I'm saying what people say. I think people are like, why isn't, but I'm like, I don't expect a political album from Taylor Swift. Frankly, I don't know if I want that. I'd pretty sure I don't. That would be fucking horrible.

It would be that. That's not what she does. You know. Talistine. Hold the lives. Like, it would be like, how does this affect me? You know, like, she's very good at writing songs about herself and her feelings. And that's what she does.

And she's, she's went, she's been doing very well in life. She's got the guy. She's got, she became a billionaire off of just her music, by the way. Besides the carbon footprint thing, by the way, I'm not aware of it. Any kind of... slavery or anything happening, you know what I mean? Or hurting of people happening to make her billions, which is good. Or she's not trying to like help robots take over or become a part of the White House.

Right now. No, that's good. I said that, but I don't actually think... I think she is a good lyricist and a thoughtful songwriter and I like it. It's just, you get what you... You got to know what you're getting. And also, and on the good lyricist thing, though, I mean, because one of the big complaints is like, people like, these lyrics are...

dumb. There are some cringy ones. There are some cringy ones. She has been getting her fucking back broken. Yeah. And what kind of a song do you write when you're getting fucked into oblivion? You write dumb, fun music. She made the album I wanted. I'm

loving it. Yeah. Dumb and fun. And I'm sorry, but like, I know we're all supposed to be sad all the time. And I know everyone's like, it's tone deaf. It's tone deaf this album. I don't want a fucking another sad album from her. I want some happy music in my goddamn life. so I don't fucking start slicing, you know, up the arm.

I just stay with flights can cross. No, you don't slice across. I don't think you slice either one of them. Which one do you do? It's updard for real, right? None of them. None of it. None of it.

None of it. But you know what you mean. Yes. Just put on the Taylor Swift down. I do know what you mean. I do know what you mean. KMS. I do know what you mean.

Yes. I want some fucking, some, give me a goddamn smile at some point. Yes. So that's kind of how I feel about that. I would also say, I think the funny thing, too, is everyone's like, it's dumb, it's bad.

They don't listen the album, but they all are just like, there's a song dissing Charlie XEX and there's a song about Travis's cock. To that I say, Travis's cock song, fuck yeah, that's awesome. Why is that a derivative thing? Why is that a bad thing, rather? Yeah. And then the diss song, okay, this is a crazy situation for me. We have to talk about it.

So let's bring this up. It's called Actually Romantic. There are lines in it that, now I will say, Holden, has Taylor come out to say that it is or is not? I mean, it's still really hard to be like, it might be about someone else. Like, I really badly want to be like, we don't actually know. But I even have to admit the lyric, yeah. The opening lyrics are, I heard you call me boring Barbie when the coax got you brave, high-fived my ex and then said, you're glad he ghosted me, wrote me a song saying it makes you sick to see my face.

Some people might be offended. So of those three lines, we've got, you know, we know Charlie X, X, X, X, like, literally, like, cocaine has been like a part of her marketing campaign, right? So, context clue number one. Kind of number be. She's just got married to the, is a drummer or bassist of 1975? One of them. One of them. I think he plays both instruments, I'm not

sure. But either way, just got married. And you know, Maddie Healy is in that band and I guess she would... And he's a wormy boy with the tiniest penis. He's the smallest man ever. He's not knocking on wood. That's for sure. He's trying to find his own penis. Yeah, he can't find it. It's too microscopic.

I don't think him in that model fuck, I think they like lay around and do drugs together. But either way, I'm happy for them. Actually, honestly, I am happy for them. Um, so that's the Condex Cone Number 2. And then Conducts 2nd Xer number 3 wrote a song. We do know about sympathy is a knife, which is, uh, um, she makes a reference to like not wanting to run into, um, uh, band member's girlfriend in the, in the green room. And everyone kind of assumed that was about Taylor. Taylor. Yada, yada, yada. And then, and I, though I will agree, like, I, I, I, I, You know, it is, it is a crazy move to, like, slight Carly, if it is about Charlie, or Charlie, rather, because Charlie is like Brat was just took over the world.

I'm terrified of Charlie X-Az. I would never poke that bear. Can you imagine her coming at you? And she took a picture. Hammered, sweetened a cigarette in your face. I'd be like, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Whatever you said, yes, yes, ma'am, yes, ma'am. She took a picture, like, from the studio and posted it, like, not long after the album came out.

Everyone's, like, speculating, is this the white girl? Kendrick Drake feud Is this the white girl Like they're not like us kind of situation And we are bracing ourselves Because this may be the beginning Which will be the great Because my Mount Rushmore

My like favorite pop girlies Taylor, Charlie XX Karly Ray Jepson right Those are like my top three Pop girls and if two of them Fucking start a feud How are you going to get through this Are you going to start therapy?

I mean I think for me I feel like the man in the middle being like, don't, don't fight over me. Oh, because in your, wait, wait a second, can we unpack this for a moment, MJ? So wait, in this scenario, they're fighting over you. He's in the middle. Yeah, well, he's got the cardigan. I'm one of the fans, right?

I'm one of the super fans. You're one of the fans. You're one of the fans. Yeah, I think, I know. But I'll switch to a green t-shirt if you write a better dis, Charlie. Whoa. You know what it is? Like, I think that, like, I'm, I'm quite impressed with Taylor's, you know,

what is the word I'm looking for when you make a lot of stuff. Like she's, you know, she makes... Prolific. Thank you. She makes so many albums. She writes so many songs and she's so into doing a whole album, you know, not like, like she wants to put out a whole project.

And I think that that's like neat and that's something I like about her. And I think that it is, you know, in terms of the like navel gazing aspect of it, I imagine, I don't know, I just feel like creativity. sometimes you need to be inspired by the world and the things around you. And I imagine when you have been so famous for so long and so insulated and so over, and also people are so mad about her just because she's so oversaturated. So I feel like it's just going to become like harder and harder to write songs that are about anything except herself.

You know? Flew across the world for Chinese food from China. Yeah. You're like, I don't, that's not. And I think what's off putting about it. I like Wood and I think it's really fun, but I think what's off-putting about it is like even Wood, it just feels like

so self-aware, but also it's like, how could it not be self-aware? She is Taylor Swift. Right? And it's like, I'm Taylor Swift and I'm singing about Dix, you know. Just getting fucking railed. Yeah, it's definitely, it's definitely that for sure.

And his love was the key that opened my thighs. I'm so good. It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it is. Honestly, it makes me think of like, writing that when you're so horny that you're like, uh, what was the key? Oh my!

Get it over there! Get it to me. And for me, honestly, it's just, it's catchy. And so is actually romantic. You know,

no matter how I feel about, like, a feud between them, which also is like so ridiculous. Like, that's when the parisocial thing, too, though, is so silly with people online.

I'm like, what is it? Do you know Charlie? They're acting like they know Charlie. And they know, you know what I mean? Totally. And like,

it just, It's like, it's a bop. The song's a fucking bop. And if Charlie gets some bops out of it too, and it becomes this whole thing, I'll... Come back at her, bitch. I would love to see Charlie coming out. Yeah. I'm, I mean, it'll be weird and a little confusing for me, but I think I'm also like all about it.

You know what I mean? Because it's kind of the two sides of me, Taylor and Charlie, you know? It's a fun feud because she... Your spectrum. Yeah, because Taylor's kind of constantly try to prove that she's like, not just a good girl, but she's so like the good she's so that like good kind of good you know her whole like the you know I know she said your English teacher just got engaged to your right uh gym teacher or whatever but I feel like it's for her it's much even though she is our age or whatever also you're a billionaire you're

calculated she's billionaire she's calculated but she she does give like I think what she I think one of the reasons people have a strong reaction to her another reason is like she does remind you of like just like the perfect girl in high school and you're like we get it you know but then it's annoying for people. But then Charlie is like the bad girl in high school. Smoking cigarettes out by the dumpster. And she's the one I want to be friends with. That's what, like, I'm down,

like I like listen to Taylor's music, but if you're going to ask me who I want to hang out with, it's Charlie. No, no, but I would be hanging out with Charlie, but I'd be like secretly pining, trying to become friends with Taylor. Why, so you can like play chess? But acting above it, but like acting above it and being like, she's so lame and then like secretly I'm like obsessed.

Yeah. That would probably be me. That was me in high school. I mean, I was like hanging out with all the... Yeah, you've been a mean girl. We've spoken kids, but I desperately wanted to be like in with the popular pretty girl table. Totally. Desperately. They never, ever invited you. Never. No, they never wanted to be called. And that ship

has sailed and I think your chance is over. I'm sorry. Well, I am going to be in 2026. I am going to be pretending to be a high school kid so I could try to relive all this. No, been kissed too. Starring Holden McNeely. Yeah, I'm going to shave the beard. I'm going to get some

serious anti-aging plastic surgery. You're going to have to do something. So much. Actually, you should do a full face mask like in, what was it, white chicks. Like you should do, but that full mask over you? Right, right. And white paint and everything. Oh, yeah.

I think, I want to lay this out because I think this has been the most interesting for me, okay? My, as I've always stated, my favorite album is reputation. Reputation, I think one of the most eye-opening things was someone on the Taylor Swift subred. it was like, here are a bunch of the critiques of reputation when it came out. Reputation was mocked, derided, shit upon hard, right? She had a bad reputation. Yeah, this is after she, you know, her stock went down after Taylor is Over party, right? We've already been through this, right?

Literally, they called it Taylor is Over party and like had a fucking party online, much like what I've seen this past week, right? Reputation is the album I got into her on because, like, I saw that show, I fell in love with the album. And I've been, I've been, like, chasing that dragon ever since. I've been wanting Reputation Part 2 ever since. This is not Reputation Part 2. This is I'm fucking a big fun football player.

A couple of tracks, though, that do signify reputation. Elizabeth Taylor's one of them. I'm not surprised because I feel like Elizabeth Taylor isn't getting as much fun love. Between that and Golden, like those two songs have just been fighting in my brain. Oh, yeah. What's stuck in my hand? Which when he is now. K-pop Dianhers.

We'll talk about that. We'll talk about that. We'll talk about Kop Divenhunter's Media Tour. But yeah, exactly. Everyone's just like, there's a song about man, penis, and there's a song about Charlie,

and this album sucks. It's the worst album ever. I'm like, and this is why I've been just like, am I listening to a different album than 80% of the internet? This album's fun as shit. This album's great. There's so many good tracks.

I could go track by track and be like, pretty much every, I don't think there's really a skip, like maybe eldest daughter, but there's even stuff about Elda's daughter. I like and I wouldn't like necessarily like feel the need to skip it. I feel like the only song for me that I have thought to skip in in extra listenings was wish list.

Yeah, wish list is fine. Wish list is, but like honey is awesome. Is, yeah. What about cancel? Father figure. What about cancel? I like cancel. Cancel is the other kind of rep style song.

Okay. So I like I'm, it's giving me rep vibes. I just feel like the problem is that where she was during rep is very different than where she is now. So having a whole song where it's like, you guys are saying all this bad stuff, it's like, you are literally the biggest star in the world. You could not be bigger. I don't really receive that as I all. I think with Cancel, I'm not necessarily listening to the lyrics because I think I would skip it every time.

You know? Yeah. I mean, I think Cancel's a thing, a sentiment I've had for a while, though, where it's just like, oh, so we're all just supposed to be perfect and not make any mistakes now at all. like no one's allowed, like we're all just, then everyone's just canceled. You know what I mean? Unless you're a weird robot person. You know what I mean?

She definitely likes to get her grievances out in her songs. And I kind of love that pettiness about her. Like the one for tortured poets department that's, but it is weird. That has a similar like, Daddy I Love Him is also just like, you guys need to shut up about me. And like, and I feel like every, you know, like, every album has a like, you people are pissing me off.

Shut the fuck up. You know, and I think I think my feeling about that would honestly depend on my mood. Like, sometimes I love a grievance. We just read Joan Rivers' second book. It's just a list of grievances. Whole book of grievances. Just here's who wrong to me. She had a rough time.

And it was she had a rough time with it. Legitimate grievances. But, yeah, I agree with that. I agree with that exact sentiment of I think a lot of people like don't want to hear this shit right now. Yeah. You know what I mean? From a billionaire. Yeah.

Which I understand. I'm in the camp of like, hey, I kind of, I know. know things are bad, but that doesn't mean I can't have a smile and you can't force me to not have a smile. Uh-huh. Weirdos, like, let me. Can I fucking smile? I know you don't want to and you're making your job not to.

And I get why. I'm not saying there's like not good reasons why, but that said, I might have a smile, okay? Um, uh, but, but. He says sweating in his glittery or sweating and yelling. I have to smile. Hey. This is like me on a family. This album's me, like, dad on a vacation.

When you were at the water park. I paid damn good money for this record. I bought all the variants. We're gonna like it. We're gonna enjoy it. I got the card again. But no, but... So warm, 85 degrees outside.

But I think what's kind of bumming me out a little bit is like, I don't think we got another album like reputation because of how Shad upon it is, and she's such a people pleaser. She wants to, like, win or whatever so bad. and rep was that album, like, didn't get nominated for anything. I bet this album, well, I don't know. Maybe she's so big now that this one, despite all of the criticism and stuff, still might

get Grammys and stuff. But, you know, in general, like, it's getting shit upon or whatever all over again. And I'm just like, everyone stop. This was like a fun album. I'm good on the, like, cottage core shit for a little bit. Like, you know, I know you guys like, that's quote unquote, like, more important music or some shit. I like her fun.

I'm fucking a football player pop. I want more of this shit. And if you guys like, it's the same thing with me. I thought me is like a fun-ass song. She hasn't played it live since everybody says. It's lame. It's like, yeah,

I like it when she's corny. And also, this isn't the first time she's been corny. Have you heard the song Paper Rings? Have you heard like so many of like the songs off of lover and stuff? Like this is, I like when she goes into this space. And it's fun and I'm enjoying it.

And I just, again, feel like I'm listening to a different album than 80% of the internet, but 80% the internet, guess what? Knock, knock. Who's there? Not wood. It's not wood. 80% of the internet hasn't even listened to the album. They all just went, it sucks, it's a bad album.

Isn't it great? She put out a bad album. Holden, now I will say a lot of people on the internet are going, Taylor, it seems like you're giving up the life of a showgirl right now, and are you never going to make music ever again? Now, I did ask this of Holden.

she's the internet decides something and then they really run it and they're like she's never making music ever again did you hear she's getting banged by a football player and she's going to get married and she's going to have children she's never going to grace our stage is ever again yes uh calm down like it's like it's you need to calm down you need to calm down yeah thank you you need to calm down don't yeah i think that and now but then simultaneously all of because we talked about this on on page seven that so many any publications have their own Taylor reporter now, which essentially is what you are, Holden. So you might want to ask LPN for like a bump because now you're the Taylor reporter. I've got to stay up all night long.

That's flowing in LPN. I tell you. They keep that cocaine room locked and it pisses me out. Like, let us in. Come on. We have like a crazy like police style drug room. You know. Give us the drugs. When we find them, we leave them in the drug room and that should be for everybody.

Exactly. But it's like our candy. room like they have in the you know those fun tech offices oh you mean like willie wonka sure yeah willie wonka that that's the tech office well i feel like there's fun delicious things at willie wanka it's also a bit of like a tech technological innovative experience when will this question is yeah what's now the internet is saying go ahead now the internet is saying that no she's not going to stop making music she's actually going to return to country they're saying now she's i don't know Where they get these things from.

Isn't that music? It is. I'm saying they are shifting from everybody's saying she's never going to make music ever again into, oh, wait, or is she going back to country? Like she's giving up the life of like a pop girlie to go back. It's like, guys, stop. I think she's, I mean, I definitely think she's going to take a big, fat ass break from touring. I think so. From touring.

She might do like. I mean, who knows if she's going to have a kid right away? But I do think if they get married and have kids. Right. I think the speculations really is she going to have a kid. That's that going to slow her down. Are we still doing this? Of course. That doesn't mean she's going to stop making music.

It doesn't mean she's going to stop touring. But it will change. I think it will, you know, I think it's fair to say that like Beyonce as an artist changed after having children. I'm here for whatever she does next. If this is her Abby Road, it's her Abby Road. I don't know. But or let it be or whatever, right?

Which it's on par for sure. I think actually romantic and let it. be the song are pretty much on the same level. What are you reading, Jackie? Why do you look so shocked? Yeah, are you looking at like anal porn? No, what is happening? I looked up Taylor Swift, and it was just revealed,

and the headline is, Taylor Swift reveals the wild snake drama that wrecked her home. What, like, went through the roller necks of my brain was the snake in her home. Then I started thinking about all the wood jokes, and then I started thinking about all the steak. And I was like, oh, is that what we're calling it? And that's what was happening in my brain. But then I started reading into that, I guess, Zoe Kravitz brought over her pet Burmese python. And it went missing in Taylor Swift's home. And she said, I just remember getting a call from my head of security and him trying to explain this story to me.

And she said, my first question was, what snake? I didn't even know there was a snake in my house. Swift explained the whole thing started when Kravitz and her mom, Lisa Bonnet, stayed at her Beverly Hills home during the Los Angeles fires. What was meant to be a kind gesture quickly turned into chaos when Kravitz's pet snake slithered into a small hole in the Swift's bathroom and disappeared. She said there's splinters on the floor. They're looking. In my mind, this is an Annie Leavich shoot. She said, this is the cheapest thing I've ever heard in my life, not a problem.

So I guess they ended up finding it. They had to like rip up her house to find the snake and they found the snake. Give us a song about that. You know, like I, you know, you got to have. Snake in my trousers, snake in my house. Yes. It's going to be, yeah. It kind of reminds me of house tour from Sabrina's new album, which is also incredible, by the way.

I love her new album. But I will say, Zoe Kravitz, shout out. I finally finished, got caught up on the studio season one. And she is incredible in that finale, two-part her finale. Oh, I haven't finished the studio. Okay, good to know. So, yeah, she is like a standout in that. Oh.

But yeah, I think for me it's the show. weird thing of like this album. I love this album. I think it's so much fun. It's, I've listened to it. That was the funny thing too, is everyone's like, it's your worst album. It sucks. I'm like, I've listened to it like 10 times. Because I'll also say this.

I think people might think I'm delusional, right? I'm delu. But I've been through a, I'm excited about the follow-up album situation before, and then it comes out. And then I like slowly, you know, come to my senses that it's like actually sucks. biscuit, I'm looking at you, never could capture that $3 bill, y'all success.

You know what I mean? Like, I've been through the Presidency of the United States of America. I've been through it before where I'm like, I can't wait for this new album and it comes on and I'm like, I like it, it's good. And then slowly go like, oh no. But has that happened with you and Taylor? Is there a Taylor album that you will admit is bad? No, and this is not it either.

And I will be, and I will admit it if and when it happens. I have a strong feeling. I just doubt it because I just vibe with her. Yeah. I just do. You know, to me,

especially too, if anything, like I'm just so excited for this after Torture Poist's department, which I enjoyed torture. But I like kind of wild swings and crazy moves, and this album has that,

you know? And it has a bunch of bobs. It's 40 minutes. It fucking... In and out. In and out. And I love spinning it. I have it on vinyl already.

Like, when he is obsessed with the fade of Aphelia, that music video's awesome. And this is the revisionist history that's already started, by the way. That video dropped. I went into the comments with the same type of people complaining about everything. And they were like, actually, this video serves. This is great.

You know, honestly, first three tracks are actually good. But after that, it really falls off. Like, they're already, like, changing, you know, the, the, the narrative here. The opinion, the narrative of what's going on. It's like, it's not. Have you heard the rest of the album? There's so many fun, great. songs on it that, you know, and I'm seeing crazy takes like, one of my least favorite songs is probably

the title track Life of Showgirl. I love the bridge and it's the only thing on the album that actually, I do agree with the critique that the album doesn't exactly serve Showgirl. And the only thing that does serve Showgirl is the bridge in the final song of the album. And that's where you get it. A little sweet spot at the end. And, and, you know, people are like, that's the best song. And it's because Sabrina's on it. I'm like, it's not the best song. It's not even close to the best song. What the fuck are you people? Like, you people are so out of your minds. Like, you just need to hate. Everyone needs to hate right now. And I'm not, and this is when I get into a bigger picture thing and you're going to think I'm insane. But I do think right now, what's-

we already thought you were insane. Please. Yeah. What's bumming me out is the only thing we can rejoice about right now, apparently, according to the internet, is when bad things happen, is when terrible things happen. And then we can get together and go, yay, this awful thing. Her fucking album sucks. I mean, that is true. And we are going to be talking about

Illaria being eliminated on the stars later on this episode. All of her joy is being lately is being sparked by horrible. I think that's a fair. No, no, you're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right.

People like, fuck these comedians. Go into this fucking festival. Fuck all these bitches. No, I agree with this shit too. But this is all it is. Fuck that guy. I'm glad he got shot. This is the vibe.

You know what he mean? And I'm not disagreeing with it, but I'm also like not loving that the only thing we could have a smile about apparently in 2025 is when horrible shit happened. Except, you know what we're having a smile about right now? K-pop demon hunters. It's the one shining light in all of this. It's so positive. It's the one shining life. I feel like this this movie came out in July and I do feel a little bit self-conclusive.

that I want to talk about it so much again still on the show. We've already talked about it. They're on the PR circuit right now. This is topical. They're on the PR circuit right now. This movie came out in July. It is still beloved. It is the most popular Netflix. Jimmy Fallon did all the stats. I watched Fallon for them, okay? Like they, he did all the stats. They went platinum. Like the movie, you know, is all this stuff about how the movie was, you know, kind of rejected by theaters. They didn't think it would do well. And then it blew everybody out of the water. but before they even did, I want to talk about their performance on Fallon

because I went into it. He's taking off the cardigan. He's taking off the cardigan. I want everybody to know. He's not. He's sweating so much. First, what happened, so they're on the circuit right now, right? So first, there was the bad bunny did SNL,

and that also is what's smiling about. He is so funny. He did such a good job. And they, so they're- He's great. Even his, the sweetest, seemingly most innocuous dude on the planet, though, is the source of the dumbest controversy. You know what I mean? Like, everything has to be rooted in some dumb shit.

Again, though, except for K-pop demon hunters. But, like, I got emotional when, during the Bad Bunny sketch, when then they came out. And I was, I was like, why is this making me cry so much? And yes, to get a little bit deep, I do think it's because, like, white supremacists are in charge right now. And I was, like, crying because Bad Bunny and the K-pop Demon Hunter women were just, like, making this beautiful, like, beautiful sketch to get. And we hadn't, like, seen them and heard them sing. And I was like, I was so emotional about it. And I was like, yeah, I got too deep.

And I was like, white supremacists won't win. But then they went on Fallon. Okay. So I spent this morning. I thought you're ready. But then. A one. I do just want to take a pause here.

I do just want to take a pause here. Everything you just said, if you really look at it, and maybe in a couple years or now, I want to, like, replay what you just said. It's insane. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's crazy. They're making us go crazy.

We're like, that I'm crying because the K-pop demon hunters are women. Because there's a man from Puerto Rico who's really good at music and, like, K-pop demon-hundred. Where did we just talking about, like, when your cup is always full, that's why it spills over so easily because our cops are all so full. Yeah, we're just crying. They've just, they've gaslit an entire population of humanity. Yes, we're in a, we're in a pretty serious downfall right now. We're all going nuts.

So you're right. People are mobilizing around negativity. You're right. I'm like, it's a good album. It's fucking good. That's his private war, all right? Is it also going through it. Yes.

And you're right. It is, I don't need to be crying at the fact that Cape Up do you after his singers came out with the bad buddy sketch. But it was nice, all right? And I just, I really enjoyed Bad Bunny on SNL. And I'm so happy that he is who he is. And I am happy that they are who they are. But so they went on Fallon Wednesday night or Tuesday night, this week.

And so it's an animated Netflix movie, right? They are the voice singers. They were allowed to take it off. I'll allow it. He's allowed to still be a Swifty. He's taking the sweater off. He cannot contain it. So, yes.

They. Oh, the Farnigan was released. No! Sorry, I'm sorry, I'm James. Please. So the three women who are the voice singers from K-pop demon hunters go on Fallon. They have never performed the song live. This was a movie, right?

E.J. Insane. Who is the voice of Rumi was like in the kind of, you know, machine to become a, like, a, like, a K-pop singer. she was with SM Entertainment, got dropped in 2011. Wow. Was told she was too old. She was born in 1991, so she was 20. She got dropped in 2011 and has not sung publicly since.

She went towards like production and songwriting. She co-wrote Golden, which is like the big hit from K.P. Demon Hunters, even though the entire soundtrack is perfect, but she. But if you're like unaware, if you've been like trying to keep your head in the sand about K.op Demon Hunters, just put on the song, Golden. Put on Golden. And so, I mean, you've heard me sing in here. But also, E.J. was, like, working with, like, Espa, twice, La seraphim.

So E.J. was still, like, working with, within, like, a bunch of huge groups. But I'm assuming I don't know if she was either producing or just songwriting. Yeah, yeah. She's, like, very successful part of, like, the music industry, but always behind the scenes, right? Right. And so. See, a real see ya. And so for their appearance on.

A lot of see you next Tuesday, though. Whoa. Their appearance on Fallon. And so that was kind of why it was such a big moment on the Bad Bunny SNL sketch when they came out because they hadn't sung live before. So in the Bad Bunny sketch, they only sing a little bit, but they come out and it's like, I'm not the only one who cried, by the way. Gideon and I were both crying. But it's like, that's them and they're singing live. And it's this kind of amazing thing because it's a cartoon.

And they're not actually a band yet, you know? And so they come out and that SNL moment happened. And then for that, they go on Fallon and they perform it live. It is EJ's first time performing since 2011. It is the three of them, the group. It is the first time they have performed it live ever. And they fucking destroyed it. And all these people had said it can't be performed live because the range is so big

that it's kind of like has to be a studio song, the vocal range. And then they did it. Yeah, when I'm trying to sing in the car, it's so like, It's crazy. I've started to analyze it too because I've been listening to it a lot. And I agree that I'm like, God, how are they fucking hitting these notes?

So I think they took the vocal range down for the live performance. So she starts pretty low. Like, I was a ghost. Like very low and it's very sexy. And, but yeah, so they just, they did it and they killed it. And she, her Instagram post about it was like,

I can't believe that was the first time I've performed live. Yeah, wild. 20, like, just crazy. Like I and I'm, it's just so beautiful and so and yes, for me, for me it's also like, I don't know, I just love that this is something that like it, it's like something that like little girls love and it's not only that little girls love it. Everybody loves it.

I just, I love it and it's about like badass women who also are like real, seem like real people in a way, you know, like when they're off tour and they're couch, couch, couch. couch couch, yes. You know, there's just something so, like, awesome about that message of, like, what those ladies represent. Except that I keep seeing headlines, too, that are like, people keep going to the hospital because they try to eat their ramen the way they eat it on K-pop dinhundred. That's on you. It's like, well, yeah, it's too hot. What do you?

I mean, that's got to be. You can't eat. I mean, I'm assuming that's good. an anime-like character. But Hendrix's golden has been number one on the Hot 100 for eight weeks. And they broke the Netflix record for being number one for 15 weeks. They're still number one. So I think that record's going to keep getting broken and broken and broken.

It's wild. In the Fallon interview, one of them is saying, like, you know, that when she was a kid, she would bring her, there all three of them are Korean-American. And one of them was saying that when she was a kid, she would bring, like, Korean food to lunch. And she would like, she was so afraid that other kids would make fun of her for the way that her food smelled that she would like crack the lunchbox open and grab the food and then close it and then eat and then like crack the lunchbox open, grab the food and then close it. And she was so like embarrassed and self-conscious for how people would treat her for her,

for just eating Korean food. And so like this like it is so emotional for them to like have this thing that is that they feel so connected to. The lyrics are, you know, English and Korean. And, like, just for it to be so beloved, I am just so moved by it. And, again, I was like, I know that I'm insane for crying at Bad Bunny and K-Up Demon Hunter's collaboration. But in these times, it's spilled over and J. And that's kind of what I'm getting at.

It's a lot harder because, again, it's a billionaire's album. But that's kind of a similar vibe I have with both things, where I'm just like, I just It's fun and everything else is so fucking awful and dire right now if you look at things, you know? And I think that, and that's why personally, too, I think that we're all, and I'm with everybody else on this, we're loving two, like a CEO getting caught cheating at a Coldplay concert. Yeah, and now I'm saying that they weren't cheating. They weren't cheating.

They were just holding each other intimately. Just like all employer-employee relationship. They hold each other intimately at concerts. I do it all in time. Yeah, every time we go to concerts together, I'm holding. Will you arm on me? Will you circle me?

Yeah. We were on tour together. Yes. Yeah. We were on tour together for 10 months. I don't think I ever saw you two touch. No, I've never, I don't know if I've ever touched him. No, I can't imagine.

But, um, can you imagine walking in and Holden's arms are encircling me from a high. Can you imagine? Like, what would you do, MJ? I think you'd burn the comedy club to the ground. But we, we love it. And, and, um, I meant to, uh, I had a thing I wanted to finish here about, just about that album really quick,

is just that when I was saying, when someone posted all the negative criticism reputation got when it first came out, and it was the same stuff. It was like the exact same. And since then, reputation has become beloved by fans and critics. Like, it's become, you know, you know,

and everybody was making fun of that album when that came out, you know? So it's all just, it's all just the same cycle of shit. It's her turn. And, you know, this was something actually Pete Davidson was talking about recently on an interview about how it's just this is the cycle of things and it's happening more and more rapidly

where we like everyone rushes to lift someone up as high as they can go and then they just throw them down like so quick so I hope it doesn't happen. Yes Pete Davidson said told Walton Goggins it was going to happen to show. Well it was so he was because he was talking about Pedro Pascal and how like it kind of had happened to him and he was like and who knows who's next is it going to be like Walton Gagin's And it was like, yeah, he's a pretty good candidate for someone that, because everyone's like, we all love him, you know? But it was even sweet, though, because Walton Goggins, when he did, when he was called out by Pete

Davidson, his response was, fuck it. How lucky am I that it's even a possibility that I even got here in the first place? And I love, because of course, that's what, like, you look at Walton Goggins. And the fact that he is and was considered one of the hottest people in this country for a time, And you look at him and he probably never expected that. No, it is true that social, it is kind of, I mean, the way that we consume entertainment and the way that it is like, whatever, whatever social media does to the entertainment cycle where it's just like, this person, this person, this person, fuck that person.

It is, that is, it does seem like a new pattern different than the past. And it is, it is gross and toxic and it's sad. I mean, hug to a girl kind of did it to herself. But, you know what I mean? But still, like, we were thrilled when it, you know, and it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When people do take glee in the downfall of others. And some people deserve to be celebrated for their downfalls, but not, you know, when we're talking about Pedro Pascal or whatever, it's like, yeah, if you're tired of people talk about Pedro Pascal, like, that's okay.

And the reason Pete Davis has said that, it was a part of a longer interview where he's talking about how it literally, that's like so much of his fall into drug addiction and all that kind of stuff, had a lot to do with the fact that everyone was like, we love this guy. and he was so young when it happened too. And he was like, and like overnight, I became, it was like, fuck this guy. And he just couldn't handle it, especially as like a 23 year old or whatever he was at the time and just went nuts. Could you at that? I mean, I don't think I can handle that at any age. But the age of 23, it's just, you know, you're still, your brain's still forming. So I think Taylor's used to it.

And I think this is just the internet now, too. Like, two things are happening at once. That album is like everyone on the internet. or a bunch of people in the room. It's like, it sucks. Yes. She put out a shitty album and everybody hates it. And at the same time, she's, was number one in the box office all weekend. Her album is crushing it in sales and a ton of people clearly are loving it. You know what I mean? And they're both happening at the dope. Both reality, it's true. The internet has become Schrodinger's cat. Both things are true at once. She both put out a failure of an album that everyone hates and it's the top selling album and everyone loves it. And everyone can't stop. listening to it. And it's making me, it's gaslighting me the internet these days. How dare you do this to Holden? You like the Michael Jordan meme where he says, and I took that personally. Yes. It's just bewildering. It's like everything is true all at once now. You know what I mean? And I take it towards, I'll take it towards, you know, politics and stuff. Like, all of our cities are

being overrun by vagrants and everything's on fire. And also, that. That's not happening at all. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. The real. Like, it's just not happening. Like, if you just go to the cities, you can see it's just not happening. You know what I mean?

But on the internet. But things like hot ice cream like Tyra Banks, those things are happening. So it's like you hear these things that where it's like, but we're living in a reality where hot ice cream is something that people are talking about. So, yeah, I'm still thinking about the hot ice cream. I can't stop thinking about it. We talk about it on page seven. Hold it.

There's, Tyra Banks is starting to sell. hot ice cream. Like it's new and it's, but it's hot now. I'm like, that's just chunky cocoa. We're selling dots. I can dip in them. Oh my God. It's ice cream, but it's not ice cream. And what's also happening at the same time is you guys are watching Dancing with the Stars and I'm not. Yes. So we're going to have to ask you for your ex-want.

All right. You knew I'm great. All my Swifties. What's up? Thank you so much. Thank you, Taylor, We appreciate this. Oh, and to try to spare you guys some emails. There's a lot of TikTok business about microaggressions in her new album or something. But the internet also already told me to shut the fuck up about it and just listen. So that's what I'm doing. Wow. So just know I'm acknowledging it right here.

After 51 minutes of all talking about it, yes. But I'm also doing my white man duty and shutting the fuck up about it and not having a take on it. So that's what I'm going to do. I'm pretty sure you just invited more emails to come, but that's not. I'm acknowledging that it exists. I'm also shutting the fuck up like I was told to do respectfully. So just know

like, it's like, I can't even believe he didn't bring this up. He did bring it up. You guys can look into it on your own. Don't talk about it though. It's your time to listen. I'm listening. I'm listening. We're healing.

And we learn. Awesome. Thank you. I love you. I listen to it. It's so good. My favorite song is father figure probably, by the way. No one even asked for that's okay.

Really? Father figure? I think I'm, and Elizabeth Taylor, I'm like, I think that's like the rep. It's stuck in my brain. I like Opelite. I love us guys.

I love this guy. Opelite's like the most saccharin. Also, in case if you were wondering, Opel is Travis's. Oh, when he is obsessed with the fate of Ophelia, by the way. It's like, she keeps asking for it.

The internet is not wrong in the fact that the first three songs are very good. Father figure, you're gonna let her read Hamlet next. Actually romantic, if you can, remove whatever the context is, actually romantic is a fucking bop. Absolutely, yes, I know it's the same chords as where is my mind. Two can exist and it's fine.

That's the other thing too. I watched some video of some guy being like, here's all the songs that are Taylor like stole for this album. And like besides one Jonas Brothers song, everything else was a obvious reference to old songs. Like he was like, look, this is like old doo-wop from opium. I think it was on purpose. Yeah. I'm like, yeah, she meant to do that.

You fucking weird out the internet's so dumb. I love the alma love you guys. Personally? And I took this. I can only now think about the meme of old and just being Michael Jordan. Love you, Alden. Bye. Love you, Alden for visiting.

All right. Now that he's gone. Let's hold for a second so that he can leave the room. Yeah, because we're going to talk shit the second you're gone. Keep the audio of him stumbling out of the room like the footsteps of Homer whenever he leaves the house and then we hear the car screeched away. Yeah, oh yeah, yeah, yeah. And we never saw him again.

Wow, he just needed to get that out. And that was it. That was his end. And I... And this is his safe space. And it's our safe space. It's why we invited him on. I feel like if you know someone that is that big of a Swifty, it's almost sacrilegious to not have him on to at least give him most of an episode to talk about it. I guess in my brain I thought it was going to be more like a 20 minute, 25 minute thing. But you know, it just happens sometimes. I'm not, not only am I not upset. I'm happy. I'm happy about it too. This is what we keep him around for. I love him. I'm also happy about the fact that Andy Richter, heart of the show. Wow. How many.

How many times did they call him the heart of the show? We get it. He's not a very good dancer and we all enjoy him, okay? Oh, my Lord. Okay, guys, dancing with the stars. It's time to get real. We got a lot to talk about. Should we start with the big matzabal in the room?

The fact that it's Disney Week, can we talk about? I think up top, I need to get out of the way. I love friend of the show. Cass, hit me up. I love every time. Yes, Cass and I have also been messaging. Great. Love it because Cass is our Dancing with the Stars Sherpa. And even Cass said, you don't need to recognize me as much on the show. I'm still doing it. Because what I loved was that Cass, I read her messages after I watched the episode. And it was so funny because she noticed the exact same thing that I did was how quickly, Hilaria nabbed that microphone out of Alfonso Ribeiro's fucking hand. When she was eliminated, when she was eliminated.

So, okay, sorry now that Holden is gone. I am very much reveling in the fact because I watched her perform. And this episode, I did, I'm going back to watching the full episodes. I don't think the whole would be. But he was just yelling about how we're only reveling in the cruelty. And now we're going to do it. But dancing with the stars, it contains multitudes. Like I'm also reveling in other people's dances because I said two.

to MJ, when I first started watching the episode yesterday, I was like, oh, a Disney theme? Is there literally any sexiness in this whatsoever? Because I watched the Dylan Ephron dance up top and, man, drier than a piece of toast over here. And he did well, but yeah, no, I hate Disney Night. I hate it. I hate it. It is, there's not enough, like, drive to a Disney song to dance. I need a beat, you know.

There's no beat to these songs. It's just, like, feels like. this like little rinky dink. I just, it's so boring. It's such a like circle jerk of like, well, this is Disney. This is, we're produced by Disney, Disney, Disney, Disney. Also, I guess I just realize that I feel a little like a silly head that there's been, what, 34 seasons of this show. Do they, I imagine the themes are not the same every year. I'm assuming, I don't know this, but I imagine that there's always a Disney theme every year just because Cass was like, what'd you think of the Disney theme? So I am assuming that the reason why they used such, now of course, you know, you've got your

Hamilton's in there. I'm not saying they didn't use big songs. But I feel like a lot of them was like, life is a highway from the car's soundtrack. That made me think of Holden, because remember what really was obsessed in that song. Maybe that's also why I was drier than a piece of toast. But I feel like after all of these seasons, I'm assuming that they can't do like, you know, the, I'm on a walk like you, talk like you, woo. Like, I feel like they can't do the big hits because they probably have done all the big hits. Maybe. So they have to use it. But I just feel like, I love. I love, loved the, like, Elaine's dance, the alien dance. But even that, I was just like, space mount.

Like, it said, like, it's like, oh, it's Space Mountain. I was like, okay. Okay. The music necessarily wasn't what I was being tantalized by, but man. Yeah, the music was boring. Holaria did a great job. And watching her, I was seething because I was like, this bitch is going to probably make it all the way to the end.

But I didn't realize the beauty of dancing with. the stars is that the audience vote counts, it seems, even more than the judge's votes, because that bitch, bye bitch. Oh, my. She wanted it so bad. How unpopular are you when you are one of the best dancers in the entire cast and you are one of the first to be sent home? Ouch, out. If she wasn't such a crazy person.

I would feel very bad for her. I would feel bad. Because that was, it was literally a popularity contest and she literally got sent home because she lost. She lost the popularity contest. And you are a mean girl and there is the door. Wow. But I was like, I said out loud to my husband, oh my God, I'm about to feel bad for Lari. This is sad.

She's like a really good dancer. She's putting a lot of heart into it. We have heard from LIS. Like, we heard, the reason I kept saying that you're not allowed to be a professional dancer is because someone told me that. And then we've also now heard that there has been like very professional, like JoJo Siwa was on there. And obviously she's dance her whole life. So maybe it's not inherently disqualifying that Hilaria had been such a skilled, nearly professional ballroom dancer. But she, you're like, oh my God, she did a great job.

She got great ratings. And then she still got sent home. And I'm feeling bad for her. And then I go ahead and watch the interviews. And yes, you are right, Jackie. She did grab the microphone out of Alfonso Riberos here. Wow. to talk, which is not what you're supposed to do.

And then she gave, like, interviews after two different interviews to people. How many times does she thank Gleb once at the very end? Kind of. She doesn't even say thank you. She just says, I had a good time dancing with you. She speaks about herself the entire time or her children. But I think she is such a narcissist. She is one of these people that when she talks about her children, she's really also talking

about herself. She is obsessed with herself. She emanates. You know how sometimes you just talk to somebody, at a party and you're like, oh, you're duds. Like, she just emanates that. Like, it's the Saturday Night Live sketch. Like, the girl you don't want to talk to at a party.

She is like the girl you don't want to talk to at a party. Too unstable to even party with. That's a certain, you know, that's a certain portion of the Venn diagram. I want to throw it out there because I never thought about it in this respect. Sherpa Cass has said that, and this makes so much sense, that if you think about, though, so many people that watch the shows also are voting for the professional dancers that they are paired with. So it's actually sometimes not fair. Like specifically with the secret lives of Mormon wives, Whitney is, I mean, Whitney is just not only killing it.

But Whitney is like Jen Affleck is with a pro that is brand new. And Whitney is with someone that it has been on for seasons. So there's also like, Like that whole aspect of the voting as well that like Robert Irwin, his dance partner, Whitney, I guess, is, was a winner of so you think you can dance. And so everybody really loves Whitney. And then Robert Irwin, if paired with Whitney on top of it, is like an explosive pairing. So it's not even just the Robert Irwin. Because if you, I, this time, because Sherpa Cass, I watched, I watched Robert Irwin's dance twice.

I like went back and watched him because one time I watched him. And then the next time I watched her. I started doing that too. I was like, I want to watch each dance twice. I want to watch the famous person. And then I want to watch the professional dancer. And I highly recommend it. It's great.

It's also very funny to watch with Gideon because Gideon. Because Gideon keeps being like, which one is the famous one? Because he doesn't know any of these people. Oh, Gideon. He has no idea with the pentatonic people. He was like, which one is the famous one? The blonde one? I was like, they're both blonde.

They're both blonde. But also, MJ, I'm going to throw this out there because before this week, I had been just watching the dances. And I didn't go out of my way to watch the Pentatonic guy. I only in my head, I was like, I don't care about the Pentatonic guy. And then I watched him perform last night and I was like, Jackie, why did you just, you just decided? Because Pentatonics, that one Christ song makes you cry. And then you don't want to watch him do the dances.

And what a delightful performer to watch. I like him. Yeah, no, I like Petitonics guy. Couldn't know his name if you, I have no idea. The tall pentatonic one. Tall pentatonic. He really did a wonderful job. What a delight.

He did great. And I just have to say, yeah, we're going to, I want to talk more about Hilaria and how, well, I guess maybe we did it. She's just, she's so, so unpleasant. But Whitney, man, talk about an unpleasant woman who is a pleasant dancer. Whitney from Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, her whole thing is. that she is just cold. She is mean. Ooh, she's calculated.

She is like a, she, you know, people will be getting into screaming fights with her and she's just calm. But like, you know she's like planning her next mood. She's a snake in the grass. She's a snake in the grass. And then you watch this woman dance. Slithering on stage. You're moved to tears.

Wow. Foundly beautiful dancer. Like who is she? She's not the same person when she's dancing. People can be. In multitudes, like I love this woman when she dances. Like, I am moved by her. Such heart, such soul from such a frigid person.

How can it happen? I don't know, MJ. She's stunning. Stunning. I want to watch it again after we're done recording. Yeah. And everything about her, everything, there's nothing to me that attracts me to her. No.

And then you watch that. No, I'm scared of her. I don't want to talk to her. Yeah, no, I don't, I don't even, I don't know if I could even hang being friends with her. Yeah, talk about high school, feel like, she's like the, she's the person in high school. You're like, if I even talk to you, something mean is going to happen, you know. But then you watch her dance. It was, it was transcendent.

Yes, I feel bad for Jen Affleck. I know. I feel bad because she's also doing great. She's really trying. She's doing a wonderful job, but not in comparison of Witt. I mean, Wittie's blowing her out of the water in their personal competition. like really blowing her out of the water. I know. I feel bad about that too because I think

Janafelik is ultimately a much more appealing person, you know. So I'd rather Genevlet get the win. You know, I think she needs a win. Can she like get a win and then like be like, oh, I have to move into my own house. Yeah, maybe I should leave my husband and maybe I should take the kids. We'd be better off not with him. But, you know, that's, we can only hope for so much from one dancing show, you know. Even Whitney, even the little like interstitial they did where with her

family at Disneyland. I was like, I don't even like you here. Like you're still unpleasant. You're like so mean, but such a fantastic dancer. Just so I was like I was not slipping through this episode, the Disney theme. There is nothing sexy to me about any of it. I and watching them in all of the content in between of them going to Disney to make this content made me dislike it more. And maybe I'm like, this is all. I'm like, God, God, look at them. You're just like, I love Disney. I love it.

Put me, put the ears on me. I need, like Andy Richter, you don't give a shit about Disney and that's okay. Yeah, no. And you're just having a good time because you're a nice man. And that's beautiful. Totally. And you're trying really hard and you're learning this choreography and we're happy for you. Oh my God, yes.

When Hilaria and her seven kids all went to Disney, I was like, you know that no one's having fun. I'm sure that it is fun to take your kids to Disney. I love taking my kids to amusement parks. But, you know, it's like, stressful too. So I hear a lot of work when you're there with little ones and then it's a lot more. It's like everybody is upset and you spent so much. Honestly, it makes me think of Holden at the water park. I've been being like, I spent so much money on this trip. You're going to be smiling every

sucker of it. But like, I just need to bring it back to Hilaria for a moment. She's talking about how like, she was like, when I, she said when I, in one of the interviews, she said, when I first landed with my kids to come here and do this, I was crying to my 12 year old and I said, what if I go home on the first night? And she said, well, then mommy, at least you tried. And I'm like, can you not make your 12 year old, your own personal coach? Well, MJ, I mean, the 12 year old is her co-host.

And I know that we do put things on each other. You and I do, yeah. And that's the name of the game, bitch. You got a book in you? You got a fucking podcast in you. Well, I guess you got a therapist in you as well. You better start supporting your mother. It's like she weaponizes her children.

The last time she was in the bottom three, she said, how dare you put me in the bottom three? My children were crying. In front of my children. And it's like, I'm sorry. Like, I'm proud of you for having kids, but it's like, you know, it's cool that you're all the kids are there, I guess. You pulled them all out of school.

It's an interesting choice. I'm trying not to judge your parenting. But like, why you, now we have to be nice to you just because you have seven kids. Because your children are here? Because you dragged your children across the country and took them out of school so that, I mean, I feel like they're not. crying. They're happy because they don't, they get to sit there and watch you dance and they don't have to go to fucking school. So I think they're doing fine. I'm just like, thank Gleb. The first

thing you should do is be like, I love dancing with Gleb. Look at Gleb. He's such a great dancer. Thank you for working with me. I love it to me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, and Shurpa, Cass was saying, you know, that so many celebrities have fucked Gleb. And you can tell in that last moment, man, no way. was Hilaria having any kind of sexual relation with Gleb? Because she was barely even, I don't think she can see past herself. Like, I think the world to her is a mirror. Exactly.

Or like a dog looking into a mirror thinking that they're looking at another dog. I feel like that's what how Hilaria lives, her life. And she can't see Gleb, you know? It's true. She can't see Gleb. Ah, she can't see him. Yeah, it's like her, she lives her life as a blind item. Yes, because she is just so, so self-obsessed.

But, yes, dancing with the stars this week did give me great joy. I had to do it. I had to watch it on Wednesday after, like, my double night class night. And I was like, got to watch fucking dancing with the stars. I was like, so usually it makes me very happy. But I was grumpy and a bit of long and hard day. And then I started watching it. And I was like, all right.

The dancing. Even with Disney Night, I was annoyed by Disney Night as a theme. But then again, I saw Whitney, and I felt like I saw God, you know, like, Sometimes you just see, and this is how I feel about K-pop Dimenhry. It's so nice when you just have an artistic experience that takes you out of current reality. Yes. And you just, it's like I've tell the story a million times, but I always thought of it during this dance. When I was a middle school teacher a long time ago, I was having the kids debate things.

And my debate question was, what's more important, the academics of the arts? And the kids were debating it. And a bunch of kids said, well, the arts are important because you could get a job. like in them. You could get, you could be a producer, you could be a choreographer, you could be a dance teacher. And this, and this little boy steps. It's a beautiful thing to think about the creative employed in the arts. But this little boy steps forward and just goes, the arts are important because they give us a reason to live. Oh my God. You've burst into tears. You're like, oh God. And it was just like these, all his peers are over here debating like, well, what'll make you more money like being

smart or get? And he's like, it's about living. And like, that is how I feel when I watch good. dancing. It's how I feel when I hear good music. And it's like, yeah, it's, and you know, to Holden's point, it's like there is a lot of, not say advocating for like a total escapism or checking out or also cruelty or anything like that. But I do feel like just for us right now, given how morally exhausted everything is, like everything, how hard everything is, when you have a moment and you're just like, man, this is beautiful. And just like taking a moment to be like, this is beautiful and beauty exists in the world, even in the form of this.

this crazy bitch from Secret Lives and Mormon lives. Oh my God, yes. She's serving beauty, and I'm going to recognize it. Also, literally earlier, I used the example of, I want to be like you when saying they didn't use that song. They definitely used that song, which is why it was in my brain, because I was thinking about Danielle Fischel's dance. And I was looking it up because I was like,

what kind of dance is that? Because there's something, you know, I'm going to say something that I'm learning while watching dancing with the is that certain kind of dance styles I like more than other ones, which of course I'm a human being. I just never thought about the different kinds of dance styles. I love the quick step. I love the jive.

See, I was just about to say, I think the quick step kind of annoys me. I think the hoppy. It's so weird. I think the hoppiness of it. There's so much hopping. They're running all over the stage. Sometimes it just looks like they're just holding hands and running. And just try and like, it's like, all right, let's, yeah.

And it's a weird dance. While it is interesting, I do feel it's one of my, and also I'm sure many people out there that are screaming, are like, quick step is the best. But if it is, like, I'm down to learn more about it, but specifically I was thinking about it during that song. And I think it's why I didn't register what song it was, because I was so focused on her fringe outfit. And I was so focused on being so dry from the Dylan Ephron performance. Yes, she didn't text me that she brought the sex he did that. But it was only because of the hop. And I didn't care about the dancing. And I was just like, yeah, look at her hop. She did great. Wow, she's hopping, huh? Well, and she brought Mr. Feeney back.

Mr. Feeney aged 98. Good for him. Good for him. He made it all the way there. It is funny watching the full episode, too, how often they pan to the audience to show people that, like, which is, you know, we work in pop culture.

And I'm not saying, obviously, there's many things we don't know here. And obviously, we definitely usually stick within, like, the kind of celebrities we all remember. but man, there are just so many that are sitting in that audience. And I'm like, who's that? Who's that?

Who's that person? This is Gideon's entire experience watching. Again, even the famous people on these, like, which one's that one? But then, yeah, like, sometimes you're like, why is Chris Jenner there? Why is Chris Jenner sitting with Alec Baldwin? And then, yeah, when Jojo Siwa was there and just staring directly into the camera, while Alfonso-Robero was trying to host. Oh, yeah, Georgia-Sew is weird.

That's why I feel fine about talking so much about dancing with the stars here on Second Helppings because it is a festival of celebrities. They're all there. They're all there. They're all in the audience. We've really missed out on 34 seasons of it. I never thought about it. It never crossed my brain.

And this is awakening me. I feel like this is like choir levels of awakening me over here. Oh, yeah. We didn't even talk about choir. Didn't even talk about choir. MJ, we didn't even have this space and hold it on all this space to talk about day. And I'm not even talking. It's okay.

We're just getting ready for the performance. The performance is coming up soon. Let me know, guys, if you're in L.A. and want to come out to a 40-minute performance of a choir at 5 p.m. on a Saturday. I would love to. Let me know. Love to. You know what my gripe is?

The tickets are $30 each. I was like, good Lord. $30. I know that we got to keep the choir going, but we all paid to be a part of this choir. Don't get me wrong, they all work very hard. All the people that do all the work. I'm not saying that they don't deserve.

I hope they're getting a bump. Yeah. $30 a ticket. I hope they get in a bump. Yeah, yeah. No, I got really mad when I had to pay $30 a ticket for my own child dance performance. And I was like, I'm going to do it.

But this is too expensive. Wow. And I threw a fit at Winnie's $12 tickets. It was like, $12. $2. Dollars to see her on stage for 20 seconds. It's just me complaining about $20. I should be, I should be thankful it wasn't 30. Yeah. No, I was shocked. It is whatever.

Yeah. I'll support the arts. We're supporting the arts. It's good. That's where we should be putting our $30. That is what we should be doing with it, you know, encouraging people. Lord knows Taylor to create community. No, she don't need it. She's up there high in the sky and her PJs looking down at all of us ants.

going, ah, they all hate me and just write another song about it. But I'm glad that here, you know, this week, I think we provided a lot of Taylor Swift content in a way that I think some people expected. Some people did it. I think it's good. But that's okay. I don't care. And, you know, you are, send any emails that you want, page seven podcast at gmail.com,

I will forward them over to holding. So just hit us up if you need to yell it. hold in about anything, honestly anything. Hit us up page 7podcastguml.com and we will forward that on. So, and that honestly is forever. But thank you, MJ, for providing such a beautiful space for us to talk about music and to talk about dancing. And if you are in L.A. and you know, you're thinking about choir down the line, that's really great. But also this Saturday, if you're listening to this before Saturday, October 11th, get your asses out to. the Enchanted Realms book festival.

Natalie and I are going to be vending over there with our LPN Romanticy Deep Dives. And Jeff has created a whole line of merch for me in the last 10 days. So if you would like to see what people can really get together and make happen in a short amount of time, come check out the Enchanted Realms Book Festival on Saturday to see what we've gotten done by them. Amazing. That's very fun. Yes, yes. You'll be singing your harmony part of umbrella at the book festival.

Yes, and people, again, no one will be there. Although my choir partners are coming out to the festival at some point. So if you want to hear us sing Rainbow by Casey Musgraves, all you have to do is look towards us and we will start doing it. And every, we just keep saying, we're going to be a hit at the parties. Like, we just keep yelling. We're going to be a hit at the parties. Like, we're going to be singing this. And every, all of our friends are scared.

that we're going to start singing a cappella at all of the parties, and they should be because we are. Yeah. Because we are all of the parts. We each are one of the parts. So together we make beautiful. Barbershop. Music, it's just like we're on tricks, except they're three and we're four.

Yes, maybe you learn golden next. Gonna be, got to be golden. I hope so. MJ, thank you so much for today. Thank you for being the soft space where I land. I appreciate you. Wow. You're welcome.

I think the cardigan is the soft space where we all landed. That big... It's full of sweat. I don't know. And something tells me that the sweat isn't going to be wicking anytime soon. I think it might be made out of dinosaur. So everybody, have a beautiful rest of your week. MJ, thank you so much.

Let's get out of here. Let's sing the song. Pot'll be better. Take a dab around. Yeah. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors. You can support our shows by supporting them.

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