Page 7 - Second Helpings - Temu Influencer

Episode Date: June 5, 2026

This week's Second Helpings Jackie's back in the VILLA and errrrrrybodies sayin' the UK is better than the US, but all the pop culture stuff is only gonna be talkin' 'bout the US one and Jackie just can't watch that much "Love Island"! Target has traded in their fake allyship for 1776 BUUUUULLSHIT. Jackie got approached to be a Temu Influencer, and there's a cop in the villa who's got a PA Mayor lettin' everyone know he left his cop job to do THAT. MJ and Gideon started watchin' "Spider Noir" and really like it, but Jackie kinda feels like it coulda been a movie. And "Widow's Bay" is still fucking amazing. MJ fell into a Skrilla hole they need to get themselves outta for the summa, so Jackie's writtin' them a 'script for some "TASKMASTER"! "Queer Eye" discourse is kinda bore-o snore-o. MJ finished the book “Yesteryear” and it's got them wonderin' what's the difference between Ballerina Farm and Pioneer Woman? Jackie's got a suggestion for everyone to check out "Stamptown" on YouTube, and before we got we're checkin' back in on that Boy Mom Discourse HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLE and Valerie Bertanelli has entered the chat, PLUS SO MUCH MOOOOOOOOOOOORE!!!! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Well, you know why? Burp, burp burp burp burp burp because somebody's in the villa. Leave me in the villa. Don't take me outside. I don't want to see the sun. Just leave me in the villa. Welcome to Second Helpans. Welcome to Second Helpings.

You're singing that song, which is I have gathered from context clues that it is the music of Love Island. But I'm also, is it also the one, the song that just goes, Like, no, no. It is its own sound. Okay. Every time there is a, like a quote-unquote commercial break or any time there's any transition, it cuts to a full slide which just says Love Island and it plays. Burr-Ber-Ber-Ber-B-B-B-Berk every single time. And it is like, I felt, MJ, I hadn't heard the sound since last year.

And then I started watching it. And the second I heard it, like a dog in heat, I was just like, go, go, go, I'm here. I'm here. I'm the bombshell. Put me in the villa. Like the sound, I've never felt more like a dog in my life. I like perked up. And I was like, I'm ready for slots.

I'm ready for slots. I'm ready for slots and wear no clothes. This is like last year when I went back to my college campus for the first time in like 18 years and I was like, I was just here, but I wasn't just here, but I remember everything, but I've lived so many lifetimes, but, and I was having this, I had like a massive existential crisis about like being in this space that felt so familiar, but as a different person. And so that's you with Love Island, but I'm also wondering, is it bringing you back to the mindset you were in last summer, which, let's be real, not a great mindset. Was bad. You know what's good

is that honestly, MJ, thank you for asking, because I feel like it's, it's a making me recognize how bad of a place I was in last year in watching it because I'm like, oh, I'm in a much better place watching this. I'm enjoying this rather than me like, yes, another bombshell. Like rather than watching it like the Tasmanian devil would probably, I would assume, absorb reality whenever he wasn't spinning around. Yeah. I'm watching it with less of a weight. And I guess less of a, need because I think last year I needed them and now I don't need them as I think as much but at the same time MJ you start watching you're like I'm never going to love them as much as I love last year's by the end of the first episode I was like ready to watch them all summer sign me up I love these idiots and I'm sorry to everyone that's going to get offended I am going to continue to refer to them as the hot idiots that I watch during the summer this is great I'm so happy that you were able to revisit it and have that.

Just like when I revisited my college campus, I was like, I am the same person and I'm not. It's like you're having that experience with Love Island. You're like, I'm a different place. Or like when you start a depression treatment and they have you do like the depression assessment at the beginning and then every few weeks. And then they show it later.

And you're like, oh, man, I forgot I was there. That's the thing. And you're like, I don't know if I'm getting better. And then you look at the assessment and you're like, oh, there is data to show that it's better. Look, I chose a different frowny face every week. Yeah. So now Love Island is your independent, you know, depression assessment. Thank you. It's because I'm independent and not because I'm just depressed this summer. No, no, no. This is an independence choice for me to do this.

I will say, I want to say thank you to everybody in our Jack and chat because I did talk this out. I, you know, MJ, I believe last year we referred to Cass as Sherpa Cass only for Dancing with the Stars. But if I remember correctly, Katz started being my Sherpa for Love Island last year. And that was like, so she was helping me enter the world. And everybody is saying that UK is better than the U.S. My problem is everything that I look at when it comes to our millennial pop culture podcast does talk about, I mean, I guess most millennial pop culture podcasts are not talking about Love Island. But here they are. These old people watch Love Island.

This millennial project does. Yes, it does. And I just, I forgot what I was saying. You don't want to watch UK because Moira Higgins is from the UK Love Island. And Rob Roush is from the U.S. Love Island. I think that tells us everything we need to know. But everybody says that like you love the vernacular so much more. and I do want that, but I know that I'm going to be hearing so much more about the U.S.

And I can't do both. MJ, I can't do both. I can't commit to both of them. I love trashy reality for many reasons, but I also remember this is a, I'm sure, an American phenomenon not unique to me, but I hear British people and I automatically think they're smarter and more dignified. Well, if you watch the first episode of Love Island, US, you would find. that that is not the case either.

Right. That's the, but I like, that's why I like, too hot to handle because I'm like, all these British people, I just,

I hear them talk and I think, how smart? And then they, and then I hear them keep talking. And I'm like, oh, no, you can have that very dignified accent while also being just such a dumbass.

Yeah, certainly. And I love that, you know, like I know it's short, short-sighted of me to assume that everyone with the British accent is smart. Again,

that's just my American brain. But, you know, I know that it's a full-time job to watch Love Island. So I think that you have to choose a lane, and I think that you're choosing the lane of the U.S., much like Target is right now. Oh, good. Compare me to Target. Oh, good. I'd love to be compared to Target. I'm sorry to invoke Target right now. I don't want to choose the U.S. for any other. Like, I literally am not.

It's not because you're celebrating the bicentennial and a half or whatever. No. Surprise. No, I'm not watching any of the what is it the Great America? or whatever. I'm not going to be watching. You know, it's just not my mind. Because I just saw TikTok about how Target's website is so like patriotism coded right now. And not pride. And not pride coded.

Whereas for years, you know, they were Target and it was corporate pride. But, you know, I still have shirts that I got at Target in the pride section. They really leaned in. And obviously for years now they have not done that. And now everything is black and white and everything is 1776. And, you know. Oh, good. All of that.

You know what? Good for them. And I love being compared to them, MJ. I'm sorry. I'm not the target of this podcast. Yeah. No, you're not. If anything, I'm like the dollar tree, all right?

No, you're the Timo. Oh my God. Thank you for recognizing me. All right, guys, this is big. This is really big news. Yes, I have been approached by none other than Timo to be an influencer. And if that's not the biggest backhanded bullshit compliment I've ever... He's like, let's look at her.

What could she... Timo? Is it Timo that she could... I don't know. To which I said to Jackie, Tibu influencer sounds like a Gen Z insult. Exactly. And I think it actually is a Jem-Z insult. I think they call someone a T-Mu influencer.

In-Sering. And so they want you to actually be a T-Boo Influencer. And I just, I love it. So, you know, I know I'm not alone in this. MJ and I both receive many messages a day of people trying to get us to sponsor their stuff. And if it's genuinely, if it's something that I don't use and is not a part of my life, it's not something that I'm looking to be an influencer of. And so oftentimes, like, you know, I'll get a lot of things of like, you and your kids would love that.

I'm like, don't have none. And then like, oh, you and your dog. and it's like, well, I don't have one. And thank you for the reminder. But I don't yell that at the email. I just don't open them. I was going to say I delete the email, but I don't do that either. I just don't open them and I just continue on with my day.

I also don't worry. Get plenty of you'd have to be a GLP1 influencer, which is also very funny that I'm like, heard. I hear you. I hear what you see when you look at my stuff. Okay, I hear it, all right? But TMO Influencer dogs? TeamO Influencer is too far.

TeamO influencer is inherently insulting. We're going to send you $500 and you can buy whatever you want at Timo. And can you just imagine I'm holding up this just like, I don't know, like a cock that was 3D printed that starts to fall apart. That I'm like, ah, it's like falling into sand as I hold it. But you should get it. For $500, I think you can buy T-Mu. I think then I can be a T-Mu owner, from influencer to owner, in $500. Well, my algorithm, you know, it knows that I'm always trying to find ways to entertain these children, especially in the summer.

And they want me to buy a T-Mu bounce house so bad. And can you imagine the danger? How quickly your children will not be your children anymore? You imagine the death trap that must be a... at Timu Bounce House. And you're talking to somebody who loves bounce houses. And I thought about getting a bounce house for them.

MJ. Here's, I actually weirdly do, at the end of the night, Jeff and I, of course, will get into our YouTube holes together. And we started watching this guy that gets a bunch of stuff at Timo and tries it out. And he just, of course, a million people do that. But he just happens to be one of the funny people that does it.

Some of the stuff is weirdly legitimate. it. A lot of the stuff. I think I say this as if people don't know what Timu is. I think we all know, I've never purchased anything from there because I am gullible. Yeah. I am easily falling into that. Like someone would be like, there's a big sign that says like hole right here and I'm at the bottom of the whole being like, I didn't. But why? How did I? Especially if it's just, you know, they're very good ads in general or just they obviously their thing is like, you're desperate about this thing. This product will solve your desperation. You know. They are right. I am desperate about many things. Yeah. They can see it in my eyes when they look through my phone right back at me with the feverish. I'm like, I just got to buy something. Yeah, I mean, I've got eight years of algorithm, the algorithm being like, you seem desperate to entertain these children.

Can we suggest this death trap bounce house that costs, you know, $25? It's only $25. Honestly, worth it to just, I mean, you don't stop the kids before they, you know, hang too, all right? You'll be watching them and bouncing. Hey, you'll make sure it'll be fine. And believe me, I have thought about it. Bounce houses are weirdly, we're in a Bounce House golden age right now, where it used to be something you could only access at a street fair. And now, for some reason, everyone wants, I mean, I know the reason.

It's because influencer culture has isolated us and has told us that we just have to buy a bunch of shit in our house and then not go anywhere. So we don't have to go to the street fair. We bring the street fair to us. And we close off ourselves from society. Yes, never have community. Yes. We don't have community. Why open yourself up to community with others?

It can get messy. So bring the bounce house to your backyard for only $350. Everyone, every, this must not be true for everybody, but everything I see is an ad for a bounce house. Yeah, you could just have a tagline and says maybe your kids won't die. And I live above a restaurant and I don't have a backyard. But the restaurant has a kind of an industrial backyard. And so have I thought about getting a janky bounce house for the industrial backyard? To just fill the small square of cement backyard that you have.

We're like, we're putting a bounce in it. And hope they just don't like bounce into the like stack of trays that are sitting out from the restaurant kitchen. Just set them up to be able to like the stack of chips at the bodega behind the bodega. Just if you set it up to where all of their inventory is, I think it'll be a good landing pad for them. You know, speaking of city infrastructure, no, we weren't, it's because I said the word cement. I did want to get back to the fact, sorry, we have to get back to the villa just for a second because MJ, I needed to tell you that there is our own ass-loving child therapist version on Love Island. He was Titty-loving. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, it was Titty-loving.

You're right. And she just didn't have enough Titty. That's why she left her out on that plank. Leave her out on the plank. God, I just, I still think about it. Oh, I make a decision. Oh, what a time. What a time to be alive.

I still think about it. I'm talking about the, I don't know if you see the article that I posted in here. So this gentleman, he was a police officer. Okay. And he left his job to go to the villa. And it's so funny because he shows up and he's like, I'm a police officer. And everyone in the villa is like, oh, you know, they're trying to be like, wow. Yeah.

Okay. And how quickly it went from because the first challenge in Love Island is they all stand behind doors where they're like answering like, are you an, a dog or a cat or a plant person? And then they stand behind the doors and then they open up the doors. and then they have to make out with each other whoever's behind the door. And I forget number one that they swallow each other's faces. It is so crazy to me how they make out. As someone that like I do make out fairly often with my husband,

I don't think we look like that. Like I don't know how they are learning how to kiss in different ways. Maybe or maybe I just never spent a lot of time looking at how much my mouth engulfed someone. else's face when I was 22. Yeah, but you don't have to be looking at yourself because we see a lot of people kiss in movies and stuff and you can tell when it's weird, you know. Like, I feel like they're trying to actually swallow each other whole.

Okay. But then it went so fast from, so he's a police officer, he's a father, and the way that he described being a father was just like, I put it in, and I had this kid, but it's best thing happened to my life. Best thing happened to my life. And now it, everything, it went so fast to like, cuff me. Daddy. Like, just so, they immediately forget that he's a police officer.

Meanwhile, back in his hometown, the mayor is just like, oh my God, this was our because he's just like, like the grabsiest of any of that. Like, like grabbing, grab and grab and grabbing. Okay, this statement is so funny. This guy on Love Island that you are talking about, he is a police officer from East Pennsylvania and the mayor of Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, who must have jurisdiction over Easton, said our police department spent a lot of time training and we paid thousands of tax dollars to send him to the police academy. We are disappointed. He left as we now have another

vacancy in our department that is impossible to fill until next year. Can you imagine being shamed by the mayor for going on Love Island? They're like, we just trained you and now you're leaving to go to Love Island. You know, it's great he doesn't have his phone. He doesn't know. He doesn't care. He's just grabbing. He's just out there grabbing. I mean, I offer this as like, I don't know, some exhibit of evidence we can put into like, you know, the kind of defund slash abolish the police movement. Maybe we send them all to the island, you know? Like, oh, many of them, you know. Put them all in the villa. Put them in the villa. God, it's going to really change it up when they bring their bombshells in. I don't know if I want to see whatever their bombshells are going to be. The mayor continued.

I never thought I'd see the day in America where a reality show participation wins out over being a police officer. Well, sorry, buddy. 2026 has showed up. Yep, that's bicentennial or whatever it is. What is it? No, that's 200.

I know, I keep forgetting what... 250, whatever. Bine half. I'm buying half. I think I said the targets' colors were black and white earlier. I meant red, white, and blue, obviously. I'd rather it'd be black and white.

I know just would, honestly, put all your fucking patriotism right into the depression filter. I just want it all. Filter it all out. I don't want to see it. Gidea and I are watching Spider-Noir right now. So maybe that's why I was thinking black and white. Oh, yeah. I don't mean Nicholas cards.

Is it so weird to have Nicholas Caird being Spider-Round? Yes, it is. But do I like it? Also, yes. I think I like it. I'm sorry. Are you being KJ. Happa right now?

I know. Sorry, that was a bit KJ. Apple. But also, isn't that kind of what Nicholas Cage is doing? Yeah, it kind of is. I'm doing a noir. This is a war. Don't you understand?

I'm a detective. Yeah. I'm so you know I am because I talk like this. In the way that KJ. Appa is like, I've seen one Jimmy Stewart movie and I will talk like this. I'm not saying Nicholas Cage hasn't seen any noir movies besides like the Maltese Falcon, but I just think it's very, I really like it. It has very good Rotten Tomato score. I'm really enjoying it. And I also love, you know, old-fashioned movie.

and film noir and everything. And also, Nicholas Cage is one of those actors where I'm like, you're amazing, you're brilliant, and you're so Nicholas Cage. And it just feels so much like Nicholas Cage doing noir. But I'm not complaining. It just is an observation. It's like, I'm Nicholas Cage and this is noir. Do you see it?

Do you see the windows of the detective office? You know, it's just very, but again, I like it. I'm not complaining. Yes, it is, it does seem that it could have been a movie. I think that we're like half way through. Yeah, instead of a series. I think that it could have been a movie. Yeah.

Yeah. Because nothing's happening so far. Yeah. I feel. You know, I, you know what it is? I'm like watching this at the same time as I'm watching Widows Bay and just nothing could possibly compare to what, for me, what they're doing in Widows Bay. Yeah.

We also, we caught up on Widows Bay and now we're watching it. Yeah. So we switched over to Spider-Noir. It's, it is an interesting. interesting, yeah, because I'm like, Spider-N-R is good. And I, you know, Gideon loves Spider-Man. He loved into the Spider-Verse. I love the whole universe. And so I'm like, this is enjoyable and fun and good. But yeah, Widows Bay is just like, unlike anything I've seen. Did you watch this week's episode of Widows Bay? No, man. Okay, I thought we were caught up and now we're not caught up because

time keeps going. It's just Matthew Rees is such an amazing actor. I'm so glad you're on the Matthew Reese train with me now. Yo, I wasn't even, like, this episode wasn't even, like this episode wasn't even about him. And again, Patricia, Kate O. Flynn, I will follow you into the fucking dark, bitch. I don't know who this bitch is. I'm obsessed with her. I want, like, I looked at, she doesn't really have that crazy of a, of a resume. Like, I'm like, I, I watch her in anything. Patricia is an amazing character. And the only reason why I specifically bring up Matthew Reese is because after you watch it, I'll talk to you about it. There's a moment in the end where, It's just, you can just see how insane of an actor Matthew Reeves is.

Yeah. There's so many enjoyable things about Widows Bay. Again, I love ghosts. I've never been to Maine, but I love the vibe of Maine. And I pitched it to my brother as I've pitched it here. Like, what if a Stephen King novel was written by a bunch of great comedians from Askat? You know, like, it's just so amazing in so many ways. And Matthew Reese is there and Stephen Root is there.

But it's also genuinely scary. Genuinely funny. it gets scarier as it goes on yeah i feel and i'm just every episode i like better than the last and i'm like i'm immediately i'm going to rewatch this whole season the second it's done yeah it is it's i am i've never seen a show like it and i feel like they're really killing it right yeah yeah i and i understand that it's so funny though because i even got i got my mom started watching and she's like i tell you i started watching the first episode And I was like, I don't know if this is going to be my thing.

I don't know if this is going to be. And then hooked. Just like, we just talk about it all the time. Like, it's such a good show. Yeah. Yeah. It is. And I have to find, you know, I've been, I need to get off of my exclusive, exclusively

consuming content about McKenzie Shurrilla kick, the hole. I'm going to call it a hole, not a kick. I've been in a hole since watching the crash. We all find ourselves in holes every once in a while. You know. And I need to get out. of that and find a new summer show. It's not going to be Love Island because I just, I mean, it sounds like a full-time job, but I need a romp. You know, I'm immersed in this toxic relationship

that this really abusive teenage girl was in with this, you know, guys. You need taskmaster. I think that's what you need. I think that I'm writing a prescription for taskmaster. I think that you need, you can jump in absolutely anywhere. You can jump into the current season with Kumil. I mean, you, you're going to. also are huge, like, and Jason Mansuchas is another one on the last, who was on the last season, if you want to jump in with like, like, more with an American comedian attached to it, especially because Jason Mansuchas, like Kumal, just loves the show so much that both of them lost money to do the show. Yeah, that's, that's very good.

That says everything to me. It's just like that they loved it. I would do the same GD thing if I could. I tell you what. Now, yeah, I also, I wanted to ask you about there. There's two different things I would, I would, we can choose which one I would like to talk that I would want to bring to the table. One is I didn't, I felt off queer eye after like season four or five. But obviously Karamo has really been out here talking shit.

I'm glad that you said this is not even very juicy because I, I read so, because I was like, oh, Garamo's going to be dropping some tea. All right, we're all right. Ready for. There was no, there are tensions. Okay. This is what's trying to be crazy about the queer eye discourse because every, of course, you know, the headlines are like, oh, bombshell about the found fun. I know, but there was no bomb. Like, the only bombshells are in the villa.

I don't, I saw not one. Yeah. Caramo is everywhere being like, oh, it was so bad. And I'm like, okay, Caramo, how bad was it? He says the word toxic multiple times. I'll give him that. And he's being so vague. Vague.

And Bobby Burke was clearly, like, strategically vague because I think he was like, I'm sure they have to be. I'm sure. Yeah, I'm sure there is a reason why they keep being like, there was a bunch of drama and we are not going to say what happened. But what, you know, what I, what, what the people exclusive that came out like yesterday or today is, is like, that he, Karamo and one another member of the Fab Five. somebody filed the complaint at like episode one season one that was alleging that Karamo was being inappropriate. And Karamo thought that the whatever, whichever member of the Fab Five it was, that that guy had filed the complaint. But really it was like somebody else on set had filed the complaint. And so from the start, Karamo had beef with this whatever person in the Fab Five,

he had been having allegedly this whatever inappropriate. And who knows if it was actually inappropriate, who knows why the complaint was filed, what it was. The article doesn't say any of that. It just says that, like, trust was broken right away because Karamo thought that one of his fellow Fab Five people had filed a complaint against him.

And then the only other T, but the fat five person hadn't. So that's one T. And then the other is that his, Karamo's mom in like season five or six, like years later, heard some of the Fab Five, I think it was Tan, Antony, and who am I missing, who's not Bobby JVN, were talking shit about Karamo on set. And mom heard and then told Karamo. And honestly, it just makes me like very sad because even though I did fall off, it was like this very nice, wholesome, sweet thing that I thought it was like a really good, successful reboot at first. and you know they obviously like I think it's fair to say that all five of them like really

approach to the show with like totally wonderful intentions of being like we really just want to help people you know and it just is like it just bums me out to be like oh this just turned into like a horrible toxic mess and I guess that just happens sometimes with an ensemble cast when different stars are rising or whatever but I just want to know who's the bitch of the Fab Five, and I think it's Antony. That's my guess, but I don't know. Whoa, throwing it on Anthony. He just keeps being like...

Is it because of the guacamole? It's because of his lack of skill and doing anything. But no, I just Crombo just in this interview, he's just like lines were drawn, lines were drawn within the Fed Five. Yeah, it's all very very vague. I just feel like they really wanted it to be like,

bombshell, but there really wasn't. We know that there's tensions between all of you. That's why you're not altogether promoing the show. Like, we know. Yet, apparently Jeremiah, who's the person who came in for the most recent two seasons, apparently he's lovely. So it really just seems like, again, it's just like, it's not juicy to just be like,

sadly, six people all tried really hard to make a nice show, and it went poorly. It was like, yeah, that's not juicy. It's just sad. No, it's just sad. It's almost as sad as Amber leaving this pamphlet on the chair for whoever. I'm glad that she did. Amber was handed a pamphlet on the bus and she brought it to work and she left it on the chair for me to find. And it says on top, ye must be born again. And I don't think that they're referring to the Lisa song, Born Again. I think that it has something to do with Jesus Howard Christ. And I'm glad that people are still, they're still doing this. They're still doing it. MJ, if you were wondering, if they were, and I'm, I am touching it now. I don't know where it's been.

I don't know what they did with it with this, all the scriptures on here. But I think it's like, I wonder what the percentage rate of turnover is on the bus. I like, I like the crazy Christians handed out pamphlets on the bus because I feel like, again, to bring up influencer culture again, I feel like now the like extremely. Original influencers? Is that we're saying pamphlet hand or outers? Heavy-handed Christianity has now. been laundered through this like aesthetic influencer like buy this sweater and also in the name of Jesus Christ, you know, and it's like, you know, again, I think I'm here for the, for the blanket

that you're selling. And then the next thing you know, you're like, have you considered joining the church of Jesus Christ in Latter-day Saints? And now you're a Christian. I think that it's, I, I, I, when I see people in the subway doing their thing, I'm like, God bless, don't go on Instagram. You know, this is also very freshly on my mind because I know this isn't book talk, but I just read yesteryear. Oh, I don't understand. I don't understand. I don't know how to read.

MJ. Tom, you're scaring me. You're allowed to talk about a book. Have you heard any of the discourse about yesteryear? No. What happened? What happened? Hey, what happened?

Which is a picture I still send in text message chains all the time. Oh, God. Hey, what happened? Get in a little. Just to quote that. probably three times a week. What happened? Okay, yesterday year is like a very, very trendy.

And I don't say that with like judgment. It just is like a very popular. Oh, oh, so I should have heard about it. Okay. I don't know where you've been. Well, you're less, you're less Instagrammy than me. And I, oh, this is the trad wife one. Is this the one that Anne Hathaway is doing?

Oh, is Anne Hathaway involved? I don't know if, is this the, I, I saw that Anne Hathaway. Hathaway was connected to a project that was about her being a trad wife. It is Ann Hathaway. Oh, she's going to be great at it. So I have heard of this book, but only in having done with N. Hathaway. You're so, I'm so glad you brought her into this. Are you because some people are upset about it?

Oh, they're saying Trad Wife horror movie. It's a trad wife sci-fi. Like, it was sci-fi horror. It's, it's, I can give the premise. It's not a spoiler at all. It is like literally the elevator pitch. It's like a trad wife, a very popular Instagram influencer trad wife, suddenly wakes up in like the 1850s and is actually a trad wife. Oh, I will.

Oh, I read this. So it's like, yeah, it's like weird like sci-fi, like alternate reality stuff. And I have read it and I have not talked about it with anybody and I have not like read anything about it yet. I just finished it yesterday. And so you know how sometimes you read something and you're like, I don't really know exactly what I think about this yet. It's really weird, really, really weird. But I think interesting and weird in a cool way. But it's like when you're reading a book and you're like this, the person who wrote this book,

spent a lot of time on Instagram. And in a way where you're like, where it feels like real, like a lot of those details are like, you know, realistic like how people on Instagram, how tradwives on Instagram talk. And then also part of me as I was reading it is like, it's just really weird to be consuming art that is so influenced by social media. Like it's weird that social media as a cultural force is now like the source material for fiction.

But I guess that makes sense because it is. It is one of the most, you know, what is the driving forces of our culture right now. But it's also fascinating because I talk to a lot of authors, like especially in the world of Romanticy and stuff like that, that, you know, we talk about often, you know, MJ and I do off Mike about how we started as podcast hosts, but then now 15 years later, every person has to kind of be their own production company with everything that they have to keep up with. Right. So it's just all of it has changed so, so drastically over time.

And I've been talking to more authors and talking about how they just want to write. And especially specifically authors, like at least if anything, we're forward facing. Authors don't necessarily want to be forward facing, but now they have to be. And it is a whole part of being an author now is also your PR, your social media, everything underneath. it and oftentimes it's like at least like I said we're comedians we want to be talking to people out in front but that's not the case with them and that also is such a barrier to entry now for beginning authors that if you don't want to be forward facing you can't really be a big author anymore yeah that's that is that is interesting unless it's like a suit and you know it's like

but then even then you like Orville peck tried to hide his face for a long time and make it like that, you know, and of course the internet ruins it really fat. Like, you know, they're going to find the information. They're going to find out everything about you at some point. That's interesting. Yeah. And so I don't know a ton about this author, but she, this is her first novel. So this is like a kind of splash.

And the character in it is very, very, very strongly, I think, based on ballerina farm, which is like one of the most popular trad wife accounts, which is like she bakes her own bread and she's home birthed eight children, but also she's married to the... I thought you were talking about the Bay and J uterus farm for a second. I was like, and he should be mason more things off of that. Again, this is where my being two on Instagram comes in, because there is an Instagram account called Ballerina Farm. There was a big expose about it last year because she is like...

I don't like that name. I don't like that name. It's because she used to be a ballerina, and then she literally gave up her dreams. Her dreams to have eight kids to children. grow them? Like, I don't understand. Like, she's grooming, gruming dancer.

Like, is this what? I think it's like she's a ballerina and she lives on a farm. I don't think she's farming ballerinas. I bet she fucking is, man. I don't trust this. I'm looking at this shit. I'll trust this shit. But she's all like, have my ballerina electrolytes.

Like, what are you talking about? That's, it's like, it's like I homebake my bread, but also buy this product. It's like that, you know, like all this. Farmer hydrate. I think they just drink water. And she's, to the air to jet blue. So I think one of the big, like, everyone was like, oh, she's homesteading.

And it's like, you are so rich, you know. Oh, I guess it doesn't mean you can't homestead if you're rich. I don't think this bitch is. But that's, yeah. So that's the, so that's kind of like the inspiration for this novel was like this, this, like, the worst kind of the worst. Look at all over aprons. That's what you know. The worst things that influencer culture has to offer.

And then it's like, well, what if now not? like this is a novel about like, it is a novel about Instagram culture. If bone broth hot cocoa, I draw the line. Of course. I don't need bone broth in my hot cocoa. Of course. About we just don't do that. Of course there's bone broth hot cocoa.

There's bone broth. This bitch. What do you, what are you talking about it? That's like, yeah. High protein farm flour. What are you talking about? Yeah. No.

That's, of course. Yeah. You could be making all this up and making jokes. I know and I'm not. But you're not. I'm not. But I guess it's just weird to think, yeah, to think that like the shit that we just like mindlessly scroll through that we all think is like not really like good. Oh my God.

And now the source material for art. All the comments. These people are some of the best, kindest people you will ever meet. They're hard workers. And yes, she is a real ballerina. She graduated from Juilliard. Their children are truly some of the sweetest littles you will ever meet. They're polite and very sweet.

Haters are going to be haters. They're very committed to their religion, which doesn't make them bad. Yeah, it's weird. Jeez, Lou. Also, not a, not a comma insight, no period use, nothing. Just, that's how you know. They're so fervent that they can't even use it. Man, I had never been to the website.

Farmer hydrate. powder bag. That's what I'm talking about. I think they drink water. I think that like if you're like, you know, we and we're saying this as someone that like we have both said that we both separately like

Pioneer Woman. I like that she, I like, but they do genuinely have a farm. Like they do have a working farm. I have been wanting to have this conversation with you. I was like, is Pioneer Woman the first Madda? I'm sure.

Oh, I sure she's Maga. I'm sure. But like for decades, Pioneer Woman. Don't look. I'm not. I don't. I look. I look. My hands are over my eyes. But you know what's different? Pioneer Woman will put fucking real mayonnaise in her pasta salad, you know. I think that's also what it is, is that she, that she also makes like stuff to like, to feed, to feed all your kin in the middle of the day. You know, it's like, I like that. But then also has stuff for like the cowgirls, which even as I said. We should never support the Pioneer Woman. No, but it's so, no, I, I, I was like lying awake at night.

After I started this novel, I was like, is, did my support of Pioneer Woman contribute to this weird culture of traffic? Yeah. But then I was like, why does Pioneer Woman not feel creepy and Ballerina Farm does feel creepy? And, I mean, I think the answer is that Pioneer Woman is creepy. And I just liked her because she was on the Food Network. I think Pioneer Woman is creepy. But I do. I like how much are, you know, but I feel like it's got to say something.

And maybe this is too much of a stretch. But for the fact that they're all of their kids, while the kids are not in the, like, have not chosen forward facing. Like I feel the same way. This is maybe too much. I feel the same way about her as a parent as I do about Gordon Ramsey as a parent. And I feel like that's what makes me like them. that I'm like, the fact that their kids are still around and not just to be on television and not just to be on television shows. And the fact that all of them chose other types of businesses and jobs and that they're all like seeming like whole normal people that does make,

that I'm like she can't be as she can't be like a Paula Dean, right? Like Paula Dean made crazy children. So I feel like she's right? I mean, right. I think, I mean, it's obviously a generational difference, too. It's like we, the people who are now making this freaky cosplay farm content are people who are our age and they grew up or younger. And I feel like I grew up watching Pioneer Woman. And yes, the thing that she has in common with tradwives is like the fetidization of like the wholesome traditional American values and families and my husband's out heard in the cast.

And I got to make a beef stew for all the ranch hands. Oh, you got to make a beef stew. Oh, yeah, you've got to feed all those hungry boys. Yeah, yeah. And so it is, I mean, it is if you were to make a vend diagram. I think it ties into the boy mom thing, though, for me. Because I think that I always kind of weirdly dreamed of being a pioneer woman where I'm like, ah, the boys are out on the horses during the day, which what?

I grew up in Queens. Like, what are you talking about, Jackie? But then that's old thing with Pioneer Woman, which I also like because she wrote that kid's book because Pioneer Woman was not a farm hound either. She was a gal from about the city. Yeah, she was a journalist in the city. Journalists in the city.

So she did have all of it. Yeah. Yeah. And then she goes and chooses. Oh, God, we just talked ourselves into liking Pioneer Woman again. I know. And again, this ranch is stole with the lamps. Like, remember there's all that story about like the Martin Scorsese movie. Yes.

It's like about her land. But it's not hers. It is her husband. generations previous, but you are correct. It is. That is correct. And it is like that she even was just like, yep. Yeah.

Yeah. No, I need to sit down and make a little Venn diagram with Pioneer Woman is one circle, Instagram, tradwives or another circle, and then what's in common? Then where does Megan Markle come in? Is there a third circle that enters this diagram chat? Megan Markle is definitely like a circle kind of like hovering nearby trying to attach itself to either. She'll never sell $100. candles, MJ.

She'll sell $62 candles, okay? She said in 2017 she would never sell $100 candles. She said over on Megan Markle's place, we only sell things that the every person can get. And now she's selling candles and the candles are $62. And I just love this specific example of how she talked herself into a hole of saying, I would never sell $100 candles, but a $62 candle. I'm just going to say it. Same, right?

I feel like I'm also not going to spend $62 on a candle either. I think my caper is eight. I think that's where I gap out. There's a collection of candles four that you can get for $256. Four whole candles. You could put them northeast, south, and west. That's all you need when it comes to candles. It's like calling the corners and the crap.

You know? Yeah. And maybe that's what you use the candles for. And then I guess you want high-end candles. And that is... And that is... This is another... I'm not going to go back to school and get a PhD,

but I could think forever about like... Whoa, don't. MJ, you just got your master's. I won't. I never will. I feel like this is how... And I also talk down every one of my friends that it's like, whenever I'm in the mood and I say,

I want another baby, tell me no. And I'm like, okay. And so I do have a couple of friends every time. And I'm like, da-da-da-da-da. Close those knees. I just could think forever about like what is what, what you're right. What is what makes Megan Markle different than the explicitly kind of like all right ballerina farm style of of tradwife. And of course, many things.

She's liberal and she's. She's an imperialist, please. Her husband just thinks Africa is his and that's different than ballerina farm. It is a little bit different. indigenous land is hers. It's her. It's like it is a little different, yes. I mean, but in many ways, the differences are aesthetic. And like, Megan Markle is trying to appeal to liberal women and Ballerina Farms trying to appeal to conservative women. But it's all about this like domestic mastery. Like, like I, you will make, you will host the best dinner party and you will make the best bread and you will have the best jam and you will have the best candle.

But I know they're different. And I'm being reductive. But I just had an idea and I feel like someday we're really going to make a version of our own Megan Markle special. Because I could only imagine being like, MJ, come over in your jammies because we are crafting bookmarks. And I just imagine the two of just pissy. I don't even wear like, I don't wear pajamas, so I'm just going to be naked. And I'm just to be like laying and just me,

I'll make a fucking bookmark. You want to put a shell on a bookmark? I'll do it. You're making a lasagna while I'm like, Jackie and I always like to have a little. bit of fireball before we start baking. It just sets the tone. It just sets the tone for the bake.

Well, she rolls a blunt. I'm just like, yeah, I'm just like, get like, on the ground that you have to light the ball because I can't reach it on the bottom. She rolls the blood. Just light activities with friends. Well, I turn on Love is Blind in the background. And it creates the perfect ambiance. Oh, this, honestly, you know, that's where we watch Love Island, UK.

And then in the background where you're like, all the birds and all the blokes, all them, they're nookin, they're having this snooker. You know, and I feel that that's what we hear in the background. I did write down this, which is not as good as the mommy, you're a what? A mama. You know, it's not one of those. But in the first episode of Love Island, there was a conversation between two people that have nothing behind their eyes. Beautiful people.

I don't know their names yet. I think one of them, this girl's name is Kenzie. And she's got Kenzie written all over. She's not... Kenzie Shirilla, the abusive car murderer. Sorry. But the other guy says, he's like, I waffle. You know what waffling means.

And she's like, yeah, of course I do. Yeah, like waffling. He's like, yeah, waffling. And she's like, yeah, like waffling. Like, waffling. And then there's a moment. And then she's like, like, when you ramble. And he's like, yeah, waffling.

And she's like, waffling. And then they continue. And it's not what it means. And also, boy, why'd you ask her if she knew what waffling meant when you apparently also didn't know what waffling meant? And I just, even that moment, I was like, this is why I watched this show. This is like how I still say rendezvous instead of rendezvous because of the show rendezvous. I cannot become a person who says waffling instead of rambling without telling anybody. I'm waffling now, so excuse me, I've just been waffling.

And everybody's correcting me And I'm going to be like, I know, I'm doing it on purpose. I know. This is my forever bit of being stupid. Yeah. I'm just like, put me in the villa. I'm ready for it. Well, I will not come to the villa with you this summer.

I am ready. I hate this for us. I'm ready to receive all of your information about the villa. And I want you to bring this information to us. I will. Because I know that all of America is in the villa. All of America is. Burr-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B.

What I'm thinking of is what you're singing sounds like, every day I'm shuffling, brup, you know. I'm sure that's where it is inspired by. But it is more in a, like an electronic air horn fashion, I would say. Because I feel like I'm not making the sound annoying enough.

So I, and they play it so much. many times during the episode. I needed to bring up, speaking of becoming obsessed with things currently, I made MJ watch a clip from this person's quote unquote standup hour that I watched that Jeff had shown me because there was a clip going around on TikTok of Jack Tucker comedy standup hour. I believe it's called Stamp Town is the name of the special. And if you just look up the Baja men joke, Jack Tucker, stand-up comedy, his name in real life is Zach Zucker. And I think it's funny that his pseudonym is Jack Tucker that made his name more accessible.

He is taking, I believe, I don't know if he's taking this show or if he's taking another show, but he is performing in Edinburgh this year. And I imagine it's with this show. He is, the thing is, it is not your usual stand-up. I don't usually watch a lot of regular stand-up. And if I do, I don't usually bring it here because it's just, I, you know, I watch it, I consume it and it's nothing. This guy is a clown, literally. Like a trained professional clown. And he was in a clown duo that worked together.

And as someone that performs weird comedy, and if you like the kind of weird shit, like a good put type thing, check out Stamptown, Jack Tucker, because the Baja men joke pulled me in, and then I loved, loved, loved the rest of this clowning special. It is so tight. It is so physically, comedically funny. And as someone I have such, for those that don't know, and if you're not aware, the clowning community is getting really, really big and getting more and more notoriety as the time goes on and you're like, oh, like clowns at fin, dual cards, like, no, it's completely different.

The theatrical art form. Yeah. The theatrical art form of clowning that is very difficult to properly achieve. It's incredible. And it's also very hard to describe. Like I, one of my best friends is a clown. Yes. And you should follow her. Her Instagram is clown mother. She has a one woman show about giving birth and being postpartum that is all clowning. And it is incredible. And yeah, she's one of my best friends from college and she studied clown. She's a, you know, a theater person. She studied clowning. And it is like, it's, yeah, it's, it's, it's, if you haven't, like, been exposed to what a clown show is, it's very hard to imagine what it is. Oftentimes it's not always funny. That's for damn sure. And a lot of the process, I

I've talked to many clowns because I would love to have the time to get into to start the clowning process. It is a process, though. It is not like, oh, I'm taking some clowning classes. No, it is really a breakdown of you so that you can find the characters within you. And it's actually very vulnerable. Very. It's not about it. Honestly, I felt, which is not the same, but kind of in a similar way.

of like if you watched Vampire the Masquerade bloodbath that we did here on the network, it was very nerve-wracking for us to do a show where we're not playing for laughs. Right. And it is, that's not, clowning is not about making people laugh. It is about connecting to yourself

and then connecting with an audience in a way of being able to follow yourself and being able to trust yourself, but you have to be broken down to get to that place. And it, like, as someone that I've just, I've never been able to do clown classes, but I've taken maskwork classes before. Yeah, that's cool.

How to bring the character into your body. Oh, yeah. And that, I'll go talk about me geeking out. Oh, my God. I will geek out about taking the character and pointing it into your body all day. Oh, my God. Two of my best friends in college also took mask work classes. And they, we had a night where I was like, I loved their mask work characters so much.

I was like, I want to drink. I want to, like, have a Friday night, like, with your care. characters. And that's, man, it's too bad you weren't around. Like, oftentimes all the mask work classes we would take, we would work on a character. And then in the end of the semester, we would have an open house where we were all in character in our masks in the room. And it would be an open house where people would come in and out and interact with us

in our characters. Because like one of the characters I had first made was a very intense murderer that I had written all these, like, journals. I had so many, because I would sit in the class, and I'm, like, writing out all of the, like, it was really such a fascinating experience. Yeah. And I've done it a couple times, and watching Jack Tucker,

it ignites me in a way that, like, it's so funny because I saw some, obviously, like, plug stuff on Reddit of, like, you should check out this comedy special in all the Reddit comments that are like, this isn't fucking stand up, this is stupid, this is stupid shit, this is just stupid Gen Z, shit. And it's like, no, man, this is, if you watch this, how tight it is. He has honed this show.

It, I, and it's, it is zany. I'm not saying that this is not, this is a very funny show. And the Baja men joke, he's, like, it is, he does a whole joke about the audience not knowing how many people were in the Baja men, which the answer is nine. And I did not know that there were nine Baja men. And he does a whole thing. about the Baja men. And long story short, I mean, it says it when you look up the clip.

He got a Baja man to show up at the show. And it's so funny. And he uses audio from Who Let the Dogs Out in this incredible way. And just in this like stim guy, it's fantastic. I only saw the clip that you sent me. But yeah, I mean,

you know, I'm always like, are you doing something different? Are you doing something interesting? This is so interesting. And the incorporation of clowning, the clown skills into stand-up is so cool and so weird. And yeah, I'm thrilled to see clowning. He's got all these props on stage.

And I was even talking about this where it's like there's obviously points where he's improvving. And yet the person whoever's in the booth is following him with like, like, vocal thing after vocal thing. Like sound cue, sound cue, shit. And like still following him. still making the end. God, I just, it really, and if you watch this and you're like, Jackie, you're an idiot. I understand it's just for me as someone that loves to do comedy like this, I felt a connection to this on a different level. And it just makes me want to get into clown work so badly. Yeah. Yeah. And just like when you said it's like, it's like the vulnerability of it

is what's so cool, which is why my friend's show is so good because it's all about the vulnerability of being a mother, being postpartum, like, this experience, which, again, her Instagram handles clown mother. She just did the Orlando Fringe. And, you know, it's great. And it's like, yeah, it's like, I, I, it makes me very happy when weird experimental art that is happening at theater festivals breaks through into the mainstream. Yes. Yes. I like that. And while like this Jack Tucker special, I don't know if it's broken into the mainstream necessarily, but it is getting bigger on TikTok. So I'm starting to see that like as I noticed that even just since

watching it, the numbers are just starting to go up for it. Like even just the views for him. And I want people to watch the stand-up show. Hell yeah. I love that. And it's just, you know, again, just something a little bit different. Now, can we, before we go, just check back in on the boy bomb discourse because I'm still in the hole.

You are in that hole. Jenny Malin. For those that didn't, if you didn't listen to all at page seven, we were talking about this with Jake. Yeah. So Jenny Malin, ex-wife, or currently being in the process of getting divorced from Jason Biggs. And they met on a movie, one of those three-word movies that I forget. Crazy. It's not Crazy Sexy Cool. Crazy Love Something.

I don't remember. Some movie they were both in. They've been together for 18 years. They're divorcing right now. And she posted a picture. of herself embracing her son a few days ago, her 12-year-old son that said, your son is the most toxic X you'll ever have,

something like that. I got to find the caption. Good Lord. Crazy stupid love, that's it. And, yeah, so she posted this extremely disturbing caption. I've got to find the actual fucking thing now because I've read this, and then she all people were unearthing.

I talked about the substack last time, but people were unearthing that substack, which was actually from earlier in May. So she's been on this for a while about how she wants to, she doesn't want her son to date anyone. She said, my son, he was texting with a 12-year-old who's not even hotter than me. Very weird. Extremely, extremely weird. Your eldest will be the most toxic boyfriend you ever have is what she said about her 12-year-old son. I'm pretty sure Linda doesn't feel this way.

I'm pretty sure. But she, I think she has written another substack, which is, I'm not going to sign up for her substack to read it. But she did post after getting some heat about the Instagram post with the 12-year-old son, your son will be the most toxic ex you've ever had. She said, it's because I'm getting separated because I'm not protected by the institution of marriage. I'm suddenly a different kind of target in what I'm posting. This is absolutely jaw-dropping. A photo of be hugging my 12-year-old son is getting ridiculed. And this is what I like to call a completely bad faith weaponization of some feminist ideas.

Because I'm not protected by the institution of marriage. What? You think that if you were still married and living with Jason Biggs that we with, I'm sorry, Jason Biggs, that we would, that we would protect you as a nation? The status I've lost by no longer being married to Jason Beggs. And how you look different. And don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that, like, she, like, you're right, society does treat people differently after post-divorce.

I'm not saying that, like, that is not the case. What she's saying, though, is bullshit. Sure. I mean, let's talk all we want about how being a divorced woman. You want to fuck your kids. That's what I'm saying. I'm sorry. You have repeatedly called your son your boyfriend.

Your boyfriend. That's weird whether you're still married or not. Very weird. I think it's weird enough that I call New York City my ex-boyfriend. I feel like even that's not fair to New York City. Yeah, so I just needed to bring that into the chat, the idea that because she's no longer married to Jason Biggs, that's why people are upset of her for calling her 12-year-old her boyfriend.

And who has entered the chat other than Valerie Bertonelli, mother to Wolfgang Von Halen. Oh, I've heard about their relationship before. Well, she says that it's weird. She's like, this is weird. Even she says it's weird. We've talked before about it. She goes on tour with him.

And she like, she's like, I can't not be with him. She has a pretty intense relationship with Wolfgang Van Halen. Yes. And she wrote, I love my son dearly. One of the happiest days is watching him marry his person. I adore her and her mother. Like, what am I missing here? Why do you have to make this so effing weird?

Jesus Christ, this essay. And I like the idea that a woman who goes on tour with her son is like, you are making it weird. You're making it weird. And also, I really love that whatever AI robot wrote this Yahoo Entertainment article. Also, Valerie Bertnelly's thread handle is Wolfie's mom. So if you don't know if you're wondering whether she's a boy mom, she is. But Wolfie's mom wrote Jesus Christ, this essay SMH, which as far as I know means shaking my head. And the Yahoo Entertainment transcribed it as Jesus Christ, that essay, parentheses, so much hate.

And I, that is not what it stands for so much hate. So much hate. Can't believe that made it through. I wish Valerie Bertnelli had in parentheses said so much hate. Like I wish that had come from Valerie Bertnelli. because there is so much hate towards this essay. So much hate. But that's not what she's saying.

She's saying, shake my head because, again, her handle is Wolfie's mom. And she is saying, you're doing too much about how much you love your son. And yeah, I think it's good that we're having this conversation about how mothers should not want to date their sons. I think that's appropriate. But even this one line, though, and this is not shading Valerie Bertnelly from me, but And it's like, while she and Eddie divorced in 2007, she maintained a close relationship with her son. Like, even that where it's like, that is such a weird divorce judgment of like. Yeah, that is weird.

Yeah, she's still her closer. She divorced her husband, but she remained a mother. But she remained a mother. Yeah, like that's stupid. And if people were stupid, if people were saying like, oh, Jenny Malin, you know, loves her son. you know, even though she's not married to Jason Biggs anymore, what's up with that? Like, yeah, that would be weird. But that's not what people are saying.

People are saying, why are you literally, in your own words, calling your son your boyfriend? That's just, it's very easy to not get criticism for being weird about your son. The key is to not call your son your boyfriend. Are you going to feel this way if Freddie or Zelda start texting a boy? Are you going to be like, not as hot as me? Nope. Needs a bigger broccoli cut. Nope.

Just imagine you just sitting there in your like A line with all covered in food stains. This is obviously after you've let yourself go. I'm talking about it in the few, you know, I'm talking 10 years from now, you know, as if we didn't just blink and 10 years just went by. But I feel like you're going to be doing this to them. and I can't wait to see it. Although maybe, I mean, I don't know if either one of them are going to be dating. Maybe never dating. I'm just saying it.

Maybe ever dating. Who knows? I don't know what the future holds, but I know that I will never call my children people I'm in a relationship with. And, you know, I mean, you do have a relationship with that. I feel like that's also where she's like, yeah, yeah, but you would never say, oh, Freddie, my girlfriend. Oh, I mean, my kid. And I feel so gross even hearing you say that. But also, one of the things...

I'm sorry, I did that to you. I think one of the things about the boy mom discourse that also is somewhat valuable is, like, because of the way the gender stuff is working, people aren't as quick to recognize a mother, you know, sexualizing her son as soon as they might recognize. I mean, of course, there's all the creepy daddy daughter stuff. But hopefully if... Lord of black kisses. You have to be a big time. There's certainly a lot of that. But I think if Jason Biggs had a 12-year-old daughter who he called his girlfriend, I think we would.

Oh, you don't think that we would be fine with it. We would not be fine with that. Beautiful. Not to keep bringing it back to the crash, but this is another thing about the McKenzie Shurillo, the crash thing, is that, and I didn't even get into this when we were talking about it. But, like, you know, bad parents. Bad parents. But also, she was, it was a horrible relationship, and she was very, like, abusive to him. There's, like, videos that he took of her berating him.

you know, just acting like a monster towards him. But because she was this like little 17-year-old girl, I think people didn't really see it. She was, you know, this like influencer and she was cute. And yeah, so we're, it's the most disgusting part of our society that anyone would ever be like, oh, you can't be abused by a woman. Like the fact that anyone would ever, especially younger or any of that kind of thing of or of like you can't be abused by a child or a teenager as well. And fear for your safety. Like, it's like there are many valid, many, many valid ways. Yeah, yeah.

For peers, you know, like, and yeah, there's many messed up things about that relationship. But that is, that has been, I think, a valuable conversation of like, this was not recognized as an abusive relationship because the abusive person was a teenage girl. And he was, you know, he was. Or back in the day when people, it's like, like, oh, like banging teachers and stuff like that. Yeah, Archie and Riverdale. Exactly. Yeah. Not that long ago.

Yeah. Yeah. Whereas, I mean, again, you know, killed with their own violin bow, though. Killed with their own violin bow. And pretty little lies definitely did also have a relationship where a male teacher was in a relationship with a high school girl and we were all meant to think it was cool. But that was fine.

I'm not I was fine with. I'm not saying that it's good for girls and that there's not a bunch of creepy shit that happens with adult men in the way that they talk about girls. But I think that Jenny Malin thought, what could be wrong? wrong with me saying I want to date my son. And people are like, no, that's wrong too. Yeah. Yeah, that's wrong too. But we, I get, and she's really, really tripling down. That's the thing. I think she is not, I don't know how you get out of this whole. But the first thing is to say, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry and I'm wrong. And I keep saying I want to date my son. I shouldn't have

said that many times. I just feel like if, if I were Jason Biggs, I guess if you're Jason Biggs, do you want to stay as far away from all of this as humanly possible? Or at what point does he have to come in and be like, can you stop doing this? Again, it's got to be hard enough to be Jason Biggs already because you're chasing things. Imagine him going through this divorce just being like, or do you think he's like, go ahead, bitch, go ahead, keep writing. Every tippy type I hear more money I get to keep. And they're like newly separated.

Newly, yes. Like maybe she's going through something and that's why she keeps calling her son her. I think if you were going through something, MJ, I still don't think you'd be calling your kids, your girlfriends. I'm pretty sure. There's nothing I could go through. That would ever make me even consider doing that. Also, I wouldn't let you say it into a microphone. Don't worry.

I'll stop you, even if you ever do. If I ever say that, please fire me. Yeah, yeah. We'll have at least a conversation. I have to get help. We will edit it out. We're going to bleep all of it out. And then everyone's going to guess.

I was like, oh, is this finally when MJ starts talking about their kids as their girlfriend? April. Sorry, April. Yeah, so I just needed to circle back on this because, yeah, it's consuming me. Yeah. I do understand. And I know that we got to get out of here. I did just want to just real quick, just drop in the whole Kiki Palmer, Sean Evans thing on the internet with the hot ones host and Kiki Palmer.

I think that I am just as obsessed with Kiki Palmer as the internet is as well. I watched the AD on her house, of course, and everybody's talking about it because I do, I'm a sucker for these. I've been watching more of them lately. And at least it's not like creepy looking at people's homes. They are inviting people into their homes. It is like, it is done on purpose. But what I love about Kiki Palmer is at one point she's talking and then she looks over and she's like,

how the hell did you get up on the counter? And her son had like her toddler had climbed up on the counter and she just goes over and she was like, I guess this is his cereal now. Like she's like, how the hell did you do that? She's like I just feel like every time I turn around, he can

do something different that he wasn't able to do before. And like her home is like not an insane mansion. It's just like it's just a home. And then the internet, if you have not followed this, Sean Evans is the host of hot ones, the podcast where he makes the, you know, celebrities eat the hot sauce on on the wings. And he has said before when asked, I believe on, if it was on chicken shop date, I forget. Yeah. Yeah, I think it was with a million to mold of them. When he was asked, have you ever interviewed someone that you have a crush on. And he said yes. And she said who. And he said Kiki Palmer. And then through the internet, Kiki Palmer finds out. And then in different interviews with like, and Sean, wink, give me a call. And

doing that. And then they just did a hot one's inter, another hot ones interview together. And it was. They gave us what we were looking for. I love this shit. Flirty. I love this. And naturally flirt. Like it didn't feel for it. They were, oh, oh. It's like the chicken shop date with, uh, what's his name, Andrew Garfield. With Andrew Garfield. Amelia Dmoldeberg and Andrew Garfield can't stop flirting. And it just, it's like so sweet. And that's also what it feels like to Sean Evans and Kiki Palmer Fledged. I don't know if you're actually in a relationship. I don't know if this is a performance.

But this feels like just like really sweet, genuine human connection that's like exciting and flirty. And it's so sweet. It's so fun to watch. And I think that it was Kiki. Oh, God, I'm going to speak out of turn. I think it was Kiki Palmer's mom that was on set that was just like talking about what a wonderful man.

He was like it was like it was just, it's all the thing. And then with the AD drop it. And then like I just saw I love boozers and Kiki Palmer's great. I love boosters. And it's just right now, I feel like we all need someone to champion. Yeah. I'd love it to continue to be Kiki Palmer because she does seem like someone that is more of a, like, just down to earth bitch that I would want to hang out with. Yeah. I just would genuinely like to hang out with her. Yeah. And so, you know, sometimes you got to put this out into the world, guys. I just said it and we got to manifest. It's, it's so sweet. And obviously Sean Evans's whole job is. that he has to be very good at talking to people and very charismatic. But so at first I was like, oh, is this just him being a good host?

And then you watch it and you're like, now you're flirting. No, it's not. You're flirting. You're flirting. And we are here for it. And I wish the best to them. I didn't even get into back rooms. I saw back room.

That was really good. Apparently, the guy was the 20-year-old director that made it was he was inspired by one-hour photo. Does that make me want to re-watch one-hour photo? Yes, it does. because that was definitely one of those Robin Williams can creep me the fuck out moments that I didn't ever knew that I needed.

Oh yeah, there's a million articles about Kane Parsons and how he's the new child prodigy director in the town. I feel that there's a lot of talk about him and Curry Barker right now where they're like, they are the top of the pop. But, you know, 20 years old, I couldn't have made that shit. I'll tell you what.

That is impressive. It was, and it was, they got like great, like a crazy cast for it too. And it's just, it was fun. You liked it. You know, my problem is, is personally, I liked obsession more. So, and I just seen obsession and they came out so close to each other. But it is a completely, that, like, you can't even compare them, though. I mean, it's completely different styles of scary movies.

So I shouldn't compare them. I just saw obsession and like to a point that like I want to watch obsession again. And that watching back rooms I kind of was like, she's just going to see obsession again. It is also, it's interesting that there's like two kind of like new very young, very hot directors who both just put out horror movies at the exact same time. Well, you meant you mean hot in in, hot like pop. Yeah. I'm not. I know I can't feel attraction to anyone younger than 27.

No, no, no, no. And even that, I think we're taking up. upwards every year, you know. It really is. It's jumping up. I think it jumps up decades every year. Yeah, yeah. And then soon I'm going to be like, no ventigenarians for this one.

Give me a centenarian. Yeah, you're not going to be a centi-enarian. Buy 250 an hour. You're not going to be a share dating the 40-year-old. You think I'm not? You just wait to see how this life unfurls, MJ. I don't know what's going to happen. And I'm not writing that off just yet of me going through some sort of late mental crisis.

And I start dating someone in their 30s. And I'm like, this is better for me. It keeps me young. And then you guys will have to navigate that. You think we're not going to go through this at some point? Yeah, yeah. No, who am I to judge share of all people? Thank you.

And judge my mental breakdowns. Your future mental breakdown. Thank you. And thank you, everybody. for joining us on this week's episode of Second Helpings. I feel all full up and I hope you do as well in your mind. And any other whole, that's what reading things like the Wolf King or Kiss of the Bass Lisk, you know, if you really want to think about getting full up, that's where you go.

Or honestly, Minotaur Milking Farm. Excuse me. Morning Glory Milking Farm. It is a Minotaur milking farm, but it is called Morning Glory Milking Farm. You and I are reading very different books. Very, very different books. Very, very different. But yesterday year really does, I think that that's my kind of book that's not romanticie.

Yeah. That's something I could really get into. And thank you for, I'm glad that you read it. And I guess I should read it too. Yeah. And Hathaway, yeah, got the rights. I think she's going to end up starring in it, which would make sense because she's tighter than a drum. So I imagine she could really play an influencer very well.

Yeah, I really feel like she's going to be great in this role. She looks, I just watched Everywhere's Prada. she looks younger now than she did that. Like, it really is crazy. She's the female Paul Rudd. Genuinely. Yeah. Very, very much so.

Which also, Paul Rod is just so fucking affable. Someone's like, you know you never age, right? And he's like, if you look, I am aging, guys. Guys, it's here. He's just aging so gracefully. So gracefully. All right. But how, that is the opposite of what this Timo influencer is going to do in the future.

I tell you what? covered in broken shit and tighter than Anne Hathaway. That's what I'm going for, y'all. See, the future holds many exciting things, everybody. Thank you for joining us this week. We will be back next week, I believe, with Kara. And I can't wait. And thank you so much, MJ.

Thank you. And I promise I will not call you a Timu influencer as an insult when I am mad at you, which never happens, but you're allowed to, though. You can use it. It's a good one. It stings. It hurts my feelings to receive. So I will say, I think that it works.

Let's sing the song. Pott'll be better a second time around. See next week. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors. You can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.