Page 7 - Second Helpings - We Need Sexier Numbers

Episode Date: April 10, 2026

This week on Second Helpings, Jackie and MJ kick things off by discussing the continued existence of "Cherry Poppin' Daddies" and the differences of ska and neo swing, MJ's terrified of the rehabin' happenin' with Nickelback, but that don't mean they ain't watchin' the new ridiculous Megan Thee Stallion x Nickelback butt-rock collab for Cheetos Flamin' Hot Crunchy Dill Pickle Cheese Flavored Snacks, Jackie's cryin' in her claws after singin' her heart out at the Victor Jones concert she attended last night and gettin' a renewed faith in humanity, and MJ converted Gideon with an ambushed watching of "Love Overboard" so they could properly explain the reality show to us all! Jackie went to see "They Will Kill You" and thought it was great, Alec Baldwin got roasted by his own daughter over his age gap with Hilaria, Ina Garten is on tour and the tickets are goin' fast, and Jackie makes a call for numbers to get sexier. Ryan Coogler has been announced as the producer for a new "Animorphs" series, Michael B. Jordan is attached to produce an Amazon TV version of "Fourth Wing", and Jackie gives a breakdown of "The Drama." Last weekend was easter so Nick Cannon got to wear his real face for a single day, MJ had to field some awkward questions from the kids, Artemis II has given us new images of the moon, and even more on this week's Second Helpings! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Yes, it will. Yes, it will. Yes, it will. Because we have so much to discuss today. MJ, how the heck are you? I'm good. I have so, we do have so much to discuss. We went into a little reality hole with Kara, which was great because I've been living, sleeping, and breathe in the Mormon wives. But there's all sorts of other good celebrity stories this week. And also a reality show that I, that I wanted to say broke my chariot. Where did that come from? Why would I say that? I think that it's, I'm glad that you didn't break your cherry on it. And I think that I would say you're a liar, MJ, because I'm pretty sure you've been busting hymonds all over other reality television for many, many years. I didn't break a reality show chair. I don't know. I can't explain why that phrase came into my head and I don't like it and I'm not going to say it again. So I apologize. You know, this is just really a sign that I grew up as a millennial and sometimes these phrases come. It's okay. out. They live in us. Yes. They live in us.

Things that boys would say back then. And maybe they still say them. I don't know. But anyway, I watched a reality show. Wow, that really is one of those, though, because I feel like things used to pop our cherry. We used to really say that a lot. Yeah. Just repulsive behavior from our, you know, fellow members of humanity that we just grew up with. It was very. Yeah, you can't choose one. That's everybody. We all were saying pop and cherries. We were all, you know. And again, I was.

Oh, my God. I was a trumpet player. Cherry pop and daddies. Remember the band? Oh my God. I had a shirt that said cherry pop and daddies on it from the band, but I didn't realize at the time because I got it at a thrift store at Brooklyn, didn't realize it was a band, just thought it was disgusting.

Wait, you moved to Brooklyn, which I know how old you were when you moved to Brooklyn. Yes. You didn't know. You can say it was old. Actually, no, technically it was very young. I was 20 years old. You were 20 years old. 20, but you didn't know about cherry pop and daddies from back?

No, I didn't. Really? You know what's surprise them. Jay, I know that here on page seven, you think that maybe I did used to listen to ska music. Never. I never have. The cherry pop and daddies is not ska, Jackie. Is it not?

I don't even know. It's Neo swing. It's, oh, it's, oh, it's, oh, did you just say Neo swing? I did say Neo swing. What the hell is Neo? Oh, wait, are you talking about that time period? Man, it was also in Brooklyn. Remember when everybody was doing the big dancing and oh God, what was that called where they flip everybody around?

A swing dancing. Yes. Yes. That was, what are you talking about that was in Brooklyn? There was a Neo swing revival when I was there. Yes. Don't gaslight me about this. I'm not gaslighting.

You know what it is, MJ, this time period, this is one of those I didn't give an F about what anybody else was doing. I was only thinking about Jeffy. This was a time period that you were probably, this was when you were doing lines waiting in line for the Harry Potter book release. Because it was, I want to say I was in middle school. And it was Cherry Pop and Daddies, the other daddy one, Big Bad Voodoo Daddy and Squirrel Nut Zippers. And they took over VH1 for a brief window of time. And then also the movie Swing Kids. And I, surely they're not related because Swing Kids is set during World War II.

but okay yeah it's from 1993 Adam we can go see the cherry poppandaddies this weekend I know they're on tour they are on to actually

let's do it Adam I'm sorry I meant July we can go to Petaluma I don't know where Petaluma is in California I'm also remind everybody

California huge so when you see that there is a show in California it does not mean when you see in a random place called Petaluma

I'm pretty sure that probably has nothing to with Los Angeles. I didn't even mean to accidentally plug the Tripop and Daddy's tour. Oh, you're I'm sorry. I think they're unplugging, MJ. Yeah, I don't think they're plugging anything up. I guess

they are while they pop it, but it's just a whole... I say let's go. I was a big fan. Thank you. Suit suit riot. Zoot Riot was huge in our home. So, this might be out of both of your comfort zones and I understand, could you just give me a quick of what

possibly the difference between Neo Swing and Skah is because in my head, they both have trumpets and they both have blow instruments. Okay. So I'm not a historian. I know you're not. I know you're not at all. I just, I'm only cursory answer. This is not from dance scientists here.

Skah or Ridge, everyone laughed at me a couple of shows ago when I said that ska and reggae are connected, but I'm right. Ska comes from, first wave Ska comes from like the same, first wave Ska and reggae, like it comes from Jamaica and a certain type of like dance music from like the 60s and 70s. That's Scott. There's a certain. That's literally off the cuff. It literally says, Nia Swing rooted in 1940s jump blues slash jazz, whereas ska was rooted in

upbeat, offbeat driven Jamaican rhythm. So no matter what, all of this music was stolen from the people that were creating the kind of music to make a cherry pie. They're both just a clear. They're all, you know, they weren't making them. That's why I guess maybe they call it a Neo swing. I'd be like maybe that's why, you know. A great connection, Jackie.

Like so many. Reaves it, you know. Like so many genres of music, it is derivative of music created by black people. And then white people took it and made it their own. But that's, I hadn't even thought of that. And named it cherry popin' dad. And yes, the key to ska. Sorry, I'm assuming Cherry Poppin Daddies is white.

I have not looked at them and I guess I should look at them. I think that you're right. The key to sky and the reason they say pick it up, pick it up, pick it up, pick it up. I was correct. It's all about the off beats. It's all about the off beats. All pick it up, pick it up is about the off beats. Yes.

And swing is more, I would say, a derivative of jazz, but it's like dance jazz. And yeah, so that's. They all have quite the choice in hats. I will say. When looking at pictures of these bands, they were really making some hat choices back then. And I think it was just like, yeah, give me another pork pie. Yeah, I put an a hat on me. Yeah, that'll make them like it.

The outfits are a big part of the music, I think, and I understand. I'm not making fun of you. I'm not making fun. I'm not making fun. I'm making jokes. But this is also coming from a person, again, you guys know, I was listening to fucking new metal with the oomelout over it, making sure I knew that I was putting an oomlout over the new.

So I'm not here judging openly because I get it to, you know? Do you know who are too busy listening to Lincoln Park? Oh yeah, because in the end, it doesn't even matter, MJ, all right? Because I could still put on that album every once in a while, maybe. Well. And just go back to it. I don't even want to say a simpler time because in my brain it wasn't a simpler time. But I go back to a different time of life.

A different time. How did you feel? And I think we breezed right through it here at page seven, but how did you feel about the Nickelback, Megan the Stallion collaboration about the Del Picklechitos? We mentioned it. But it just, it did. I think there's now, you know, culture is always swinging a big thing and then a reaction, a big thing and then a reaction against it.

And now we're in like this reaction against hating nickelback, which is terrifying to me. Now everyone's like maybe Nickelback is good. And that, I mean, it's been a 20-year swing, but still, I'm anxious about it. Now we're rehabilitating Nickelback. I think it's because Nickelback is in on the joke. I think it's because Nickelback doesn't go against what people say about Nickelback. So I believe in their eyes, if they see money in the path of, oh, you guys just want to make fun of us, oh, you can make fun of us as long as we're making money.

And that, honestly, I got no, somebody's got to be a heel. Yeah. We've got Holden McNeely at this network. You know, it's like somebody's got to be the heel. Yes. You got to have it somewhere. So I'm thought, honestly, I kind of love that you know, and for those of you that check out Jackin every Friday and watch the way I very respectfully watch Megan the Stallion

videos. Oh, I just do it so respectfully. I think that she can do nothing wrong. Yes. I think that I would, I would watch. Man, she wants to feed me Cheetos. I'm, I'll take it. I'm not even that huge of a Cheeto person.

I would sit there, I'll suck the dust off of her fingers. If she asks me to, I'm not going to do it. Because all of a sudden, you're just going to find me in the middle of, you know, someday when I'm working with Megan the Stallion and then I'm just like sucking on her fingers. And then I get fired. And that would be really bad for my brand. Yeah. Oh, finger sucker Zabrowski.

And Henry would have to then try to let everyone know he's not the one that's referred to as finger suck and Zabrowski. Yeah, that would be bad for Henry. as well. Yes, but I really like, I'll watch Megan the Stallion. Do anything? Yeah. Have you watched any, have you ever watched Megan the Stallion videos?

I, I have seen Megan the Stallion music videos, but not as much as I wish that I, I wish I watch them every Friday with you and Holden because, yeah, she is an artist where when I, when I get the chance to watch her, I'm, I stop what I'm doing and I give her my full attention. Ooh, I just, yeah, she really, she commands. the attention, in multiple ways. Even in that stupid Cheeto ad, I was like, you know what, Megan the Stallion? I love you.

I love this. I watched the whole ad, MJ. Did you watch the whole damn thing. It was three and a half minutes long. And at first I was like, what? And then I watched the whole thing. Yep. And this is how they get us.

But that's okay. You know, we're here to be gotten. There are so many other ways in which we could be getting gotten that if, you know, it's a nickelback Megan the Stallion collab, there's a lot of other bad things. non-so. Yeah. I just, you know, I put my socks on. I go to work. I'm crying in my costume. I go to work. You know, I want to bring this up because if we're talking about music that Jackie gets lost in, I went to go see a concert last night. I went to go see a young performer named Victor Jones. And he makes, and the reason why, man, go into like a small LA club that is sold out, I will say, as someone that is in the process of getting my full. back patch tested with allergies and I am constantly in a state of I want to rip off all of my skin

and yet still I went to this concert last night where it was very, very warm and I sang my fucking heart out in a room full of people that there's nothing like seeing a performer before they've got, I hope, before Victor Jones gets too big that you see them in a small spot like that because it was such a special, because you knew that the 75 people that sold out this show all really wanted to be there, and we all had a blast. Yeah, yeah, I love this. I love that you went to a show like that. And also, I mean, it's not exactly the same thing, but I'll always forever be jealous of you

and Holden's seeing Chapel in like a pretty intimate venue before she blew up. It was like a 300-seater or something, right? Yeah, and we had VIP tickets, so we were right in front of her. because that was back when. And even the VIP meet and greet where we met her. Like I have a signed poster from her. You know, it's, that's crazy to me. And I try, I like to really listen, especially over on Jack and which, if you're listening to this, this comes out on Friday, go over to twitch.tv slash, oh, no, it's Jackie. And check out Kara is joining me this week. And I'm going to get her drunk. And I like it because Kara listens to a bunch of other different music that I don't listen to. And then she opens us up to other music. But Victor Jones, the lines that really got me, and I know specifically because I am a person that wears costumes, but he just sings about crying in costume often. And it does make me wonder, I think that he's talking about, like, wearing the costume of life. Yeah.

But for me, as someone that wears costumes all the time, and last year, like, if this song had come out last year, when I remember I was dressed up as a fake, creole. that was that's half lion but also has like eagle claw hands and I had big wings on and I remember getting a very upsetting phone call from my mother and that I was just in the in the hallway of work sobbing as I'm like I've got whiskers on like I've got and I'm just crying crying and then I took a picture of myself because I was like technically this is very funny it is a very funny it is a very funny thing to witness. And so it's nice to give yourself some perspective. And Victor Jones is just a, and I know that I'd said this to you guys before, he just reminds me, I know that he's a Brooklyn,

or I think Brooklyn, but a New York comedian, he just reminds me of where a lot of us were 10 years ago. Yeah, doing like trying weird things. Yeah, trying weird shit and just like, just doing a weird character but not a character and making fun where it's like it's aggressive music but it's all filled with love and there's also like positive energy and it was just really great and it's another one of those when I was bringing up like the baby no money concert that I went to a couple weeks ago that it's moments like this that I feel like we need to encourage each other to do of reminding that like this was a good humanity night I needed a good humanity night I I feel like we need to be adding these into in any way that you can.

Find like, oh, like a free festival that's going on. Like something that you could go to of just reminding you that people are still getting together and making weird stuff. And we want to scream about the Harry Potter's being read. And we want to scream about all the everything else. And then you go and you're like, okay, there is good. There's good. Every time I see live performance, I'm like, oh, yes, I love this.

And yes, like I became a parent and it became harder to do all that. But also I think just for people, even for people who aren't parents, it's like the pandemic really took a lot of that out of us, you know, like going out. And just you described me, one of like one of my weird little New York stories is that I was in an open mic in probably, God, what year? I don't know, 2008, maybe 2009. I was in an open mic before Donald Glover had gotten famous. And there was like 10 people there. And I don't even remember what had just happened to him. I think something bad and just something hard to just happen in his personal life.

And he was just up on stage and just kind of went on like an unscripted, like kind of funny rant exploration of like how he was feeling. And it was a tiny, crappy open mic. But, you know, he was, I don't even maybe, I don't even know if he was already a writer on 30 Rock. He must have been. But he wasn't Donald Glover yet. He wasn't Donald Glover yet. Because he used to do stuff at the UCB all the time. He was around.

Yes. And so, but like, and I think it was like a month or two later that like things were. really gotten meteoric for him. And it's just such a fun memory to be like, yeah, I, was it like a shitty open mic with that guy before he became like a household name, you know? And before became childish game. You know, before he was like, and to watch. And especially someone that does go on where he was a wonderful and is a wonderful

comedian, but then to also create different facets of his persona to create such different art. And that's also what, I mean, I'm not comparing, you know, Donald Glover and Victor Jones, but it's just just seeing people where even in the Victor Jones show, it's like, there was stand-up in it. And also you could see that he was kind of donning a character just for the singing and what he brings to the stage. And I love it. Yeah. I love to see it. And I love to see weird. I mean, obviously, look at what we do here. I'll be in. I guess I like to see weird shit getting made, you know? It's kind of, it's kind of what I'm basing my whole everything on because we need more weird

shit out there, guys. We do, we need more weird shit. We need more live shows. We need more gathering together. But I did the opposite of what you did last night, Jackie. I was home. Oh. I was home and I was watching stupid television.

And guess what I was watching? I said to my husband, I said, if we, we've been very busy and we haven't really watched much together lately, but I don't have time to watch anything else except something that I want to talk about on page seven. And so we're watching Love Overboard. And he said, oh, I don't want to watch that. And I said, too bad. That's what we're watching. And he went and got his some work to do so that he could sit with me while I watched it and not pay attention. But guess what? Which is really sweet. It is sweet. But guess who loved it. We both loved it because... You know Gabby Wendy's going to pull you into that show. Okay. Yes. And it's hosted by Gabby Wendy, who I don't have an emotional attachment to, but

Many people do. You didn't watch the Traders season. See, this is the thing. She's like, I looked her resume up and I was like, she seems to just be a professional reality show hopper. She's all, no, she's also Robbie Hoffman's wife. I'm obsessed with Gabby Wendy. I'm obsessed with Gabby Wendy.

I'm obsessed with Robbie Hoffman. I'm obsessed with their love for each other. Gabby Wendy was on, God, I always forget which one is which. This is so stupid. The Bachelor. Yes, she was on both. That's what I looked. She was on both.

Bachelor and Dancing with the Stars. That's why I say reality show hopper. I'm like, you're just going from the most famous headline reality shows one to the other. I mean, it's an amazing career. And most famous of all came out as a lesbian, so everybody knew that she's not going to be on The Bachelor ever again. That's right. And I love Robbie Hoffman. Yes, yes, yes.

Oh, okay. All right. That's a fun. That's a fun relationship. I did not know that. And, oh my God, MJ, following the two of them on Instagram. And also, Robbie Hoffman is just like, I'm married to a queen. I'm married to a queen.

Look at, I mean, how do, I worship, I worship at her at her altar every day. Obviously, look at my wife, she's a goddamn queen. And just they, they, they, but also Gabby Windy is just as obsessed with her king as well. Like, it is just like this, I love them. Okay. So much. You're in for a treat because she's a- I can't wait to watch Love Over, that's why tell me everything about Love Overmore.

She's a great host. Again, I did not have a previous relationship before. She's a fantastic host. She's super funny. And so you got a bunch of hot, dumbasses. They're all on a yacht. Okay. And Gabby Wendy.

Okay. All right. I'm sorry. They're all on a super yacht is what it says right here, MJ. You're burying the lead. They are on a super yacht. And I actually looked, Gabby Wendy is so funny that I looked her up to find out if she was a comedian because she is, like, because obviously a lot of comedians host these shows now. And she's just, she's very up for the task.

So. She's so funny. Winley just off the cuff so funny. Super funny. I'm going to bring you into what Love Overboard is by telling you about the three twists. I just kept saying as the show went on, there's another twist. And Gideon was like, you're the perfect audience for this show because I was just incredulous at each twist. Okay. So all the hot, hot dumbasses are there on the super yacht, okay? Gabby Windy gathers them around and says, oh, look at this nice yacht, isn't it so nice? Well, guess what? Twist number one, you guys are going to stand with a wall between you and we're going to pick random.

names out of a hat, a boy and a girl, and you've all seen each other. So you, if you, if, uh, if you like the person who you get matched up with, then you cheers your champagne glass and you couple up with them. And if you don't like them, you dump out your champagne and you can say no. So that's how it starts. And so they end up with, I think, three or four couples who both like said, yeah, like I'll couple up with you. So twist number one, if you found a match, you get to live on the nice part of the yacht. If you didn't, you live in steerage. The doubt. The doubt. So I watched the first like 10 minutes, but I do love, I kind of, I, it made me, it gave me,

just the beginning, just because I watched the first 10 minutes, it gave me the F-boy Island feel to where it's just like, you will be punished, go be punished. And now you are, it's like, oh, not kissing, we'll get to cleaning, bitches. Yes, it has the F-boy Island feel where, again, maybe because it's hosted by somebody who's so funny, it feels like it's in on the joke in a way that sometimes, like I, I think, I feel like the Mormon wives are just like very earnest about what they do, you know, like some reality shows. Which is why, yeah, they're healing. I feel I do, I do love that as well.

But I, there is a place in my heart for a long, for an overboard. Yeah. Or long board. Love overboard. What is it? Love overboard. It's confusing because there are many other boat based reality shows. There are, yes, there are many boat based reality shows.

Also I was looking at, because I looked up Gabby Windy also hosts a podcast called Longwinded. So I was also looking at the phrase long-winded, so my brain was all over the place. Yeah, and mind you, this show's been out for, I think, at least a couple weeks now. It's not brand new, but it is, I think the buzz is still churning. So that's twist number one. You're at steerage. Twist number two, the only way to get out of steerage is to steal somebody else's man or woman of the existing couples. So if there's four couples, the only way you get out of steerage is you go up and you take one of those men and the men agrees to go with you.

You kick that woman out. and now she's in steerage. Whoa. So there's only room for you if you steal somebody. So that's obviously a fantastic twist. Yeah, it is. Oh man, that's going to make some cutthroat ass bitches. Oh, my God.

Who's the person that wrote in? I can't remember your name right now. On Patreon, someone wrote, like, me and my sister only, we never watch reality. And then we watched Farmer Wants a Wife and we're like, okay, we're only going to watch this. And then we watched Traders and we're like, oh my God, we're obsessed with Rob Rausch. And then we started watching Love Island. And we're like, oh, my God, he doesn't even come in until halfway through. And then now we're obsessed with Love Island.

And I was just like, I know, I know, man. It's a weird, slippery slope. And then I was like, and now you're going to look forward to hiding from the sun throughout the summer. We can all again pretend because it is another sad summer, guys. So just stay inside and watch Love Island. But until then, watch Love Overbored. I'm sorry. Continue, MJ.

The final twist. Okay, so just to give a concrete example, a woman, now a man has, a man likes a woman who's already in a couple. He says, I'm going to go after that hot lady. He goes and talks to the hot lady on the boat and hot lady says, ooh, I kind of like you, but I like the man I'm partnered with. What should I do? How does she decide? This is where the plank comes in. I had previously described it as the man that you don't choose walks the plank, but it's even better. There's two planks. And so the woman trying to decide. between two men, there's two planks and one man goes on each plank and they have to stand at the edge of the plank and look at her. It's high up too. It's very high. It's not just like, oh, they're just jumping from the boat. Also, remember, this is a super yacht, which I did look up the difference between a yacht and a super yacht, and it is just luxury in size. So they're on this huge, huge boat that they are genuinely having to jump off of this plank. Into the Mediterranean seat. That's, no, I, that there's a lot of things I would put up with, like a lot of switches on a reality show that I think I'd put up with.

That, not one of them. Well, I'd say, I guess, don't pull me on the show then. One of the women in the first episode is, you know, it's like, you know right away like, oh, this lady is going to be the star. She is just having a nervous breakdown about every single twist. She's like, I don't clean. I don't live in storage. And so she's just crying. entire episode. It's very...

I don't cook. I don't clean. Let me tell you, I got this ring. And it's wet ass pussy. And yeah, then whoever... Whatever man doesn't get chosen, the plank drops out from under him, like a dunk tank, and he plunges into the Mediterranean Sea. In all of his clothes, fully dressed. Holy clothes. Yeah, with the dress shoes.

Oh, the whole thing, the whole lines. They've got jeans on, you know. Throw them in. I like that the conceit, too, is that... And then we live. them in the Mediterranean Sea. It's like, we know that that's not what happens. But I do imagine they leave them out there for a bit.

Yeah, no, it really is giving, oh, what is the, the, it's giving midsumar. I was like, this is like a, this is like a reality show midsumar. It's like, oh. Dude, honestly, though, if they made a midsummer reality show, bet, fucking get me out there, dude. That would be awesome. But I guess it would have to end in death. I guess it would be more of like a Hunger Games kind of. of thing. But I think the midsomar of it is like just increasingly like thankfully there are

divers waiting in the Mediterranean Sea to make sure that the men don't drown. But like the reason it feels like midsumar is they are literally saying like you just plunge into the sea forever. And I do feel like the people on the reality show, even if there weren't divers to rescue them, they'd be like, okay, this is what we're doing. This is where we are. This is we're going along with the culture here. And I feel like it's also, you know, sometimes you find, out really crazy things that really rich people do. So maybe just because they were on a super yacht, they're like, oh, maybe all rich people do this. Like, I mean, it's like, oh, this is just what rich people do when they're on a yacht. We execute the man we don't choose.

And so I just, I really cannot recommend. You don't want to keep them on the boat. Yeah. Throw them into the sea. What do you want to keep sailing with them now? Throw them out into the Mediterranean. I love this, MJ. It's so good. And Gideon identifies as somebody who doesn't want to enjoy reality. And then we were just watching and laughing. And yet. And And yet didn't he watch? Didn't he put that work down and start watching it? One of the men is a child therapist. And he's talking about how seriously he takes his work.

And like the woman he got partnered with is like, wow, like you're a child therapist. That's so cool. He talks about two things. He talks about being a child therapist. And he talks about how much he loves big plastic titties. Those are the two things he talks about. He loves plastic tities. Man, that's exactly what I want in my child's therapist.

I want that therapist. Well, at least he's not looking at the kids. At least he's looking right up in money. Look right up here. You know, I guess that's good that he only likes huge fake tit. Like, you have to be a consenting adult, at least, to get huge fake tits. Yeah. That is good, you know?

And he's going to talk about it. And he's at war with himself because he loves big fake tits. But what if he falls in love with somebody who doesn't have big fake tits? Oh, God, what if he loves somebody with little tits? What is he going to do? he doesn't know. Oh my god, he's going to have to put some sort of like sensor bar over like the chest area just so he never has to look at it. Honestly, it kind of makes me think of I don't know if you've been watching any of the new episodes of love on the spectrum because one of it's, it's one of the, the gentleman going on dates was talking about he really wanted a girl with curvy, curly, curvy hair, curly curly hair, and just really he's like, and then he meets someone and he really likes her and he's like, mom, she doesn't. even have curly, curvy hair. And I'm like, she's straight hair, and I like her. And like, and I really like her, and she's got straight hair. And it is that kind of, I, I, but I know that I'm not,

this is the neurotypical version of that's more. And I know, I know that it's a different kind of comparison, but I just mean that it is funny when you're like so focused on something and you're like, but what if I did like a little tiddy late? Totally. Yeah, no, totally. He's really has to confront his preexisting beliefs and he's going to put the little-titted lady and the big-titted lady on the plank. See which one floats. The only one that's going to float is one with the big fake ditties. And maybe that's why he likes them the best because they're going to survive the plank.

All right. It's all about. So maybe he's just a survivalist. And that's adorable. Oh my God. At one point he was like, he was like, I love big plastic tits, but also I want to have a baby someday. And I don't even know if people with big plastic tits can rest feed.

And I was like, you are a child's therapy. Like, it's just, I know that you don't have to know these things because you're a child's therapist. But they're just like thinking about putting your child in a vulnerable situation where it's like, you know that any therapy, especially nude, something that's nude for them is. And then to think that that's the guy that's going to be hanging out with like my child in a, she's like, never mind. It's a wild choice as a child therapist to be like, I'm going to not only go on the dumbest reality show yet. but I'm also going to talk about my relentless love for big fake honkers. It is big old, tiggle bitties. I can't wait to see this.

It's so fun. But a dirty dog. It sounds like, yeah, we got dirty dogs back in the chat, MJ. Oh, dirty dogs have entered the chat. That's for sure. I need them dirty. They're young. Oh, yeah.

They're young dogs. Everyone's very, everyone's like, you know, under 25. You're not going to, none of them, you're not going to thirst. So don't worry about that. It's not why I watch these. I mean, same with Love Island. I'm really not thirsting for any of them. I just like to watch.

I like to watch their brains because I think that it is like, you know, whenever you're on set, you do kind of, you know, we talk about like showmances and stuff like that. You get lost in, you know, the actual reality of outside of your set life because you're all, imagine all of that happening on a super yacht and you don't ever leave like the super yacht and just everything. It's like, how do you process in your brain that like all of it? of this is really happening. All of it is on film. How, like, I feel like you'd have such, these shows really should have some sort of, like, therapy on staff,

psychologists on set. Like, they should really have something. On-site adult therapists. But they don't, and we still keep watching it. Well, yes, have a good time, everybody. This is your, this is your pleasure for the week. And they dropped all of the episodes, too. So it is a, it is something that you can,

definitely binge. In a completely opposite way, I went to go see a movie that I barely heard anything about and really, really enjoyed it. And it was called They Will Kill You. And it is a smaller horror action comedy that I saw starring Zazzy Beats and I really like Zazzy Beats. And this movie, it's one of those where I feel like you often see reviews of, um, especially like an action movie, especially with a female lead in an action movie where they say it's kill bill-esque. I would say this is, and it's not kill bill, but I would say it definitely gives the same kind of atmosphere of a kill bill where it is very exaggerated and cartoonish, but also

very fun, very engaging. Patricia Arquette and Heather Graham and Tom Felton are the bad guys. in it. I didn't know anything about it. I literally just knew Zazzi Beetz was in it. And it was in and out of the theater so fast. And it's by, it was made by this, um, Russian director. And I had never heard of him before. It was just one of those that I just wanted to see it. It was, it was the weekend of the Super Mario movie and the other, oh, and, and it was the drama as well. So, the drama, and which I did obviously end up seeing as well. But they will kill you was a lot of fun. And it's another one of those little ones. And man, if you, if you like watching a woman that's really good at

killing, kill a bunch of bad guys, watch they will kill you. Okay. I'll watch almost anything with Heather Graham or Patricia Arquette. So to have both of them, yes, please. It was, it was a delight. I'm not going to say anything else about it because I don't want to give anything away, but it really was, it was just a little nugget of a good fun action comedy horror. Okay. All right. But moving right along. Well, what else do we want to touch on? I know you, we might want to talk about the drama a little bit, but we don't want to spoil it.

I'm trying not to spoil it, but I want to talk about it so badly. Yeah. I want to talk about it too, because I feel like your opinions on it are interesting to me. Before that, how about we talk about the video that went viral of Alec Baldwin's daughter, making fun of him. for having a massive age gap with Hilaria. That was fun. He was talking about how he just turned 68 and he said, this is my favorite birthday yet,

except for when I turned 40. That was my other favorite birthday. And the oldest kid who is the one who... The 12-year-old who has a book in her, who had a book in her. She's already given birth to the book, yeah. I had a book in her and now has a podcast in her. She said, oh, when you turned 40, mom was 14.

And everyone's sharing it, like, drag him. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's just a toxic family, you know? I just worry about them. You know, it's not even weirdly enough the age gap per se. There's something about a 12-year-old bringing it up. That's the thing.

It was shared as a like, watch the Baldwin's oldest daughter, Rose's dad. And I saw it and I was just like, this is viscerally uncomfortable. Yeah, and it's more of just, I think we talk about it so much on Desperate Housewives with the parentification of poor Terry Hatcher. daughter, Julie. Where it's just like, Julie's literally looking through the, you know, the case files and was like, but mom, don't worry, he was a cop killer, but he did it in self-defense. She's 13 years old, Susan. Susan needs to deparentify Julie and Hilaria needs to de-parentify Carmen.

Yes. I think that this is definitely a, I think this is a little bit of a Susan so zaney situation. and I feel like these Baldwin's, man, and you know that this stuff gets brought up as she's just desperately trying to claw back in front of the spot. Like it's like, no one's talking about them. Yeah. But she's like, but I do a podcast with my 12 year old. Why is no one talking about us? Yeah, that's the thing.

It's just because, again, I do continue to follow her on Instagram. and her hilarious thirst for fame is like it's it does it's that it's not it's not midso mar but it does it has the thing where you're watching it and you just know you're like this is just this just this just will not end well something is this there's no way that you should be putting children this young in front of a camera this much it's so interesting because as somebody who follows a lot of parent influencers over the last seven years that I've been a parent the the mindset has shifted so rapidly against putting your kids online. Like, all these parent influencers had to completely change how they make content. It is now so, it happened quite, like, effectively.

It is pretty, like, universally frowned upon to show your kids online now. And Hilaria just did not get the memo. And she's trying to make her 12-year-old famous. She ripped up the memo. She spore, like, she spilled her matcha all over the memo. It was like, Lod memo.

And I'm just like, excuse me, I'm sorry. I think you forgot what accent you were supposed to have. Now, at the top of our document, I did write that I had to break the barefoot contessa news to you. And you don't know what this means. And I want, I was excited. No, she's alive. Oh, she's alive. Oh, she's alive.

She's put it out in the book. Is Jeffrey alive? Jeffrey's alive. Don't worry, he's out in Fire Island. She hasn't seen him in about six years, but she thinks he's alive out in Fire Island with his boys. but Ina Garten I got excited because she's starting to do like

in conversation with Ina and you could go see her talk and I got I saw that she was doing this I saw that there was a presale for her tickets and I was like I'm going to get this for MJ I'm going to get them tickets to go see Ina and MJ

within an hour there were none of the presale tickets left they were all gone except for one in the front row. And I literally thought, I was like, what if I just get MJ a ticket? And then I went to go buy it and it was $350. No.

And I love you, MJ. And I know you just had a big birthday. So it's like, you know, I thought, but then I was like, do I spend $350 for MJ to go alone to the Ina Garten show? where they sit by themselves in the front row. And I thought about it for a while. And then I lost the ticket and then the ticket had already sold it. I was like, this is probably for the best.

Wow. And so I wanted to break the news to you because I wanted to bring it up to you because maybe the rest of the tickets will go on sale. I'm literally looking right now. Yeah. And I, because then I also was like, but MJ also, I really thought about this for a while, MJ because it's like you read the INA book, but you also were fallen asleep just by reading the Ina book. So would you fall asleep at the talkback? Because really, can you imagine her

sitting up there? Oh, it's going to be so boring. And especially as a parent of two under the age of six, like you're asleep. You'll be immediately asleep. And you'd be in the front row. There are still tickets available, but they are $140. each. Each, yeah. It is, she is sticking it to you out there. There is no way.

There's no reason for this, Ina. I love you, bitch, but like there's no reason for this. Oh my God. And it's, wow, it's all the way in October, too. Okay, you've given me a lot to think about. And I'm sorry that I'm laying this a pawns to your feet. I'm not trying to get,

because I was like, I was going to buy you this, but now you buy me so. But I just, I literally needed to bring this up to you because I was like, I'm going to forget. because I had set up for that pre-sale, and then when I saw all of that, well, it all just atrophied.

Wow. And now that that didn't work, you know, my brain, my ADHD brain, I'm like, well, now it's never going to happen. It doesn't exist. I'm never going to think about it again. So that's why I wanted to bring it up here. She's not even in conversation with anyone.

She's just there. No, she's just there. It's just this bitch sitting on a fucking sit. You know, she's not even standing? You think she's going to go through and give you all the highlights of twilight? I don't think so. I think that you're going to, I mean, is it just going to be people being like,

what's your favorite kind recipe? And he's like, oh, you simply have to use part. I don't know. She's going to talk about her honeymoon in France. She's going to talk about her like. It was the last time she had sex with Jeffrey, all right? Let her hang her hat on that. Her trial separation from Jeffrey.

I mean, I did end up finishing the book. And if I remember correctly, I did say that I would recommend it for anybody having like intense anxiety problems because it's, so boring that it kind of clears the mind. Which we need those books, not saying. Yes. Oh, yeah. Yeah, as somebody who's currently seeking... Yeah, young Sharon, what's her name? Yeah. I'm seeking higher intensity interventions for my anxiety.

I need more than what I'm doing, which is nothing. So maybe... Join me in my monster erotica. I really say, man, you're not thinking about any kind of anything out there when you're trying to think of, How do I seduce this big foot? Wow. Well, thank you for letting me know. I am going to think about it.

And this is one of those ones where I think it would probably be better to go alone. I think it would actually be, I mean, I'll make Gideon watch Love Overboard with me, but making him go to. Can you imagine, Brit, make it your spouse who doesn't care about Ina Garton, go listen to her quietly speak for two hours? I mean, I didn't even think about Gideon as an option. I literally was just thinking of getting you and your mom ticket. I was like, there's no way, Giddy. I was like, you and your mom would go. Like, I mean, yeah, I definitely, that's, like, if I had my mom, like, within blocks of me,

that fish would be going to see. So many things that might, I mean, it's, it's difficult enough, even just undergoing multiple weeks of allergy patch testing that I have to bring it up on microphone because I just look at my poor husband and how he'll listen. He'll listen to the complaints. But you really, you hit a threshold. I think it's 10 days. is the threshold of complaints

in a marriage. I think it's like once you're still complaining about something 10 days later it's like, oh, you gotta switch it up. You gotta switch it up. You gotta take it to microphone. Yeah. So you take it here instead. Have you made any fun discoveries about your allergies yet? You know, I'm allergic to Jasmine. I didn't know that. That's interesting.

Right now, I'm undergo. No, this is why. And Neo Swing. So that's why I couldn't get into the Cherry Pop and Daddies. No, I'm allergic to like a bunch of stuff that's in, like chapsticks and now I'm doing all the metals. And what they don't tell you about when they test all the metals on your back is that it's not only itchy, it also hurts.

So it's just a, and it's all, my entire back is completely covered and you have to do it for weeks. And it's so crazy because I feel nuts. I feel like such a nuts person because you're not really supposed to talk. You know, it's like this is a boring thing. I'm saying a boring thing right now. But it's in company, it's like when you have a tooth pain. You know, it's like when it's that kind of pain where you're, or when it's just, it's just you press against your back at all time.

Like, Jeff will come over and hug me and I'm like, if you're back there, you better be scratching. You know, I've said that many times whenever he touches his hands upon me. No, the allergy testing is really one of those things where when I look upon someone's back that has like 40 pokes in it, I really think, isn't there a, we must, modern science, we can send people. to the moon? Can't we figure out a better way to figure out what people are allergic to? And yet MJ, it is a weird, like, I do feel fascinated by it because I feel like I'm like, I am the lab rat

now, I am just the lab rat and I'm like, go ahead, put your topicles on me. I just feel like I'm just trying to slay a dragon, yeah, put me, put your medals on me. And I feel that it is, you know what doesn't kill you makes you stronger? Kelly Clarkson said it. Yeah. And I

try to, I keep trying to remind myself of that and that is going to me stronger in the long run and it's not just going to make me have to complain for the next three years because weekly i'm going to have to go get shots but we're not crossing that bridge yet we don't need to worry about it because i'm over here thinking and yeah mj i am going to say it we need sexier numbers maybe this is because i'm currently writing a fuck game right and i'm thinking in the world of fuck only okay and i was trying to make a joke and then i i was going to say like I was making a joke about sexy numbers.

Uh-huh. And I tried to say, and I'm like, wow, it's really just 69, isn't it? And there's only, like, in the fun number territory, it's really just 69 and 420. Those are the only ones. And then the kids tried to do 6-7. And then it's like, but that was fine. That was funny for them, and that's fine. But I feel like there's so many numbers.

And I feel there's just so much more horniness that could be laid into this. This is not in the list of articles you sent me to discuss. This is just a Jackie thought. No, this is just me. No, no, no, no, it's me. I unfortunately have nothing to contribute to this, except that there's a British children's television show called number blocks that is numbers personified.

And I almost hate to even recommend it to you because it's not what you're looking for. But maybe what you're saying is we write the game where you can fuck the numbers and we make the numbers sexier. Adult naughty number blocks is... Adult naughty number blocks is... Yes, adult naughty number blocks. I think this is going to be very offensive to anybody who's watching number blocks because it is a lovely little show. Oh, is it like a veggie-tale?

I don't know. There's a lot of erotic fan fiction written about veggie-tales. Well, Veggie tales is Christian, isn't it? Vegetail is secretly Christian? Yeah. I don't think the numbers are Christian. It's overly Christian. It is very Christian. And that's why they like to write the erotica about them because what if they all were fucking each other instead?

Yeah, the numbers in number blocks are quite platonic, but I would like you to just Google number blocks. And I want to see which one is your favorite because I think it's, I think I know who it's going to be. By the way, it's pounded by produce is the name of the book that I was thinking of where they do word the veggie tails. You fuck the veggie tails. It's called pounded by produce. What is it? Number was it? I'm thinking about, yeah, I was thinking about the numbers. I need you to Google number blocks. And I just want you to say. I just want you to tell me which number you're... I think all the numbers are adults.

Are they children numbers? Am I allowed to do this? I think the numbers are adults. I don't know. I don't know. Oh, they're just blocks, MJBlocks. They're not even numbers. They're just blocks.

They are... Oh, blocks aren't numbers? What is a number? It's not the representation of an amount of blocks. Of a Lego? I guess. Yeah, it is the foundation, but, you know, also, like, mitochondria is the foundation of a cell. I'm not looking at a mitochondria show.

Are you attracted to? it to number eight. That's all I need to know. Oh, okay. I think it's number eight who you would like the best. They sing songs about the different numbers. I just, I, you know, is it because of the multiple arms?

Do they all have this many arms? No, most of them just have two arms. Most of them, so you picked out this one specifically for me. Is this because she got big eyelashes? I do, oh, I like her. Oh, I'll like it. I like what's that.

happen. I like that she's bright pink. I like that she's got six arms. I like that she definitely wouldn't trust me as a human being. And that is something that we would have to work towards. But this could be an enemy's to lover's number trope. And I'm fine with that. You know, why was seven scared of eight? Because seven, eight, nine, you know? And that's, that's inherently a fuck joke. I just made it a fuck joke. So that is, I guess it should be, why is seven turned on by eight because seven, eight, nine. That's it. That's how we make it sex. That's the sexy number. Now you're making sexy numbers. Your mission accomplished. See, this is why I bring this here. We have to be able to talk about

this stuff or else. What am I just supposed to spin my wheels by myself alone at home thinking about sexy numbers? Yeah. And what numbers I want to fuck? Yeah. I mean, I'm waiting. I'm bracing myself for the people who are going to be mad at me for bringing, dragging number blocks into this filthy conversation because I thank you for it. They're just innocent platonic numbers, try to teach about numbers and I've soiled their name. Well, you're going to be soiling something when you're pounded by produce. You should get into it. It's short. I, so many people have told me about pounded by produce as well. So it's, it's not, this is not just a one person recommendation. No, I know, I know there's a whole veggie tails like CD underbelly. I think,

I just think that that CD underbelly does not exist for number blocks. And so that's why I feel guilty about dragging them into this. And I'm sorry, MJ, all I heard was you're starting a conversation that hasn't started yet. And is that not what we were talking about at the top of this show? We're trying to make weird shit. Trying to make new things, yeah.

And sometimes you've got to take these number blocks and you think maybe they're anthropomorphic numbers, but they're not, they're just regular blocks, but some of them have more arms than the other ones. And so maybe which one just really depends on what, honestly, I like the one that's like the rainbow brick tower. Yeah, that's seven. really, oh, that's seven. Oh, that's seven. I'm into seven, too. We all know seven's the most interesting number under 10. Yeah, of course it is. It's the one that you always pick. Yeah,

exactly. I feel like either or three. You know, you got to get those odds in there, y'all. This is what we're talking about. Fingers on the pulse of society, which is why I'm bringing up animorphs. Y'all, we were just talking about animorphs, and I was just getting into the idea of animorphs. Ryan Coogler is making animorphs. This is wild. I really feel he is making animals. I can't believe we were just talking about animorphs and now there is a fucking Ryan Coogler animorphs coming out. I truly cannot believe it. And it's, it's perfect. I also didn't know that it's like an allegory about like gender and like identity and stuff. Yeah. It's amazing. There's a lot. It seems that there's a lot that is encapsulated in these 50s. books and they are making a series. Of course, it hurts my chest because they're making it for Disney

Plus and I, but at the same time, Disney Plus can go there. You know, we get like the Andors, we get that. I just, animorphs is what I've heard. Very upsetting and very scary and very harrowing tale. And, but I feel like Ryan Cougler's, I'm hoping. is going to be wanting to explore that. Like, you can't want to make animorphs and not want to make it. Because it's like, Jeff was telling me, like, those kids die. Like, they are, like, there's a lot of death in these books. We got a tremendous amount of feedback about animorphs.

People, I really, like, because I didn't read them. And like I said, I just kind of saw them at the book fair. And I did not realize there is, like, deep lore, intense emotional relationships with the Anamorphs series. Yeah. So I think it's great. Also, the headline that you sent at them is get ready for a YAA franchise not written by a transphobic billionaire.

And I think that's fun. I just, it really, it puts a huge smile on my face. Because you're right. Let's lift up animorphs instead. How about we do this instead? How about we not make another Harry Potter? But what's interesting, they are YA books. They're meant for children.

And so is Ryan Kugler going to give it? the like adult, like, is this going to be for adults who fondly remember animorphs as kids, or is it going to be for current kids, which is the original intention of the text? Because you got to remember why A in the 90s different. Dark. It was scary. Yeah. And I think that even like Jeff had said, he's like, I don't think my parents knew at all

what I was reading in these, but like I don't think they had any idea. So I'm assuming that he, in my. brain Ryan Coogler wanted to produce this adaptation because he was a fan back in the day. So I'm hoping that this is going to be made with love. I mean, he doesn't see, he's Ryan Coogler. He's at this point, he can do any project he fucking wants. So the fact that he's pushing this ahead, I am all aboard. I mean, between that, like, also, this is completely separate, but I was talking about this with Jeff yesterday because he was unaware that Michael B. Jordan is producing Fourth Wing, the Fourth Wing series.

Oh, right. And that's another one of the huge Romanticy series that are out. And it's about Dragon Riders and, oh, my God, Zaden. And I, because Michael B. Jordan, like, loves the books, believes in Romanticy, wants to be making good shit that is a part of this. And Fourth Wing is so huge that he's like, and I want, he's like, I want to champion this because I want it to be made right. And we see this with like, S.J.N.

where she just, and Natalie and I talk about it a lot, that we think a lot of these series really should be animated. I think if you're going to be able to get the scope of what all of this contains, I think that animated is probably the way to go. So I'm fascinated to see what Michael B. Jordan is also good. But I like that, again, these are people that are in love with the texts that want to see, you know, in this our world. of heated rivalry, which, yes, I'm wearing a heated rivalry shirt. I got my he shoots and he scores

shirt on. And I got it in yesterday and I immediately put it on and I was very excited. And because they're seeing finally that these are like romance and romance see is huge. Right. So many people are into it. And we've been told for so many generations that we are supposed to be ashamed of it. Yeah. Yeah. And I, but in like it's like a guilty pleasure and not an actual art. Yeah. Yes, and that's why I like that, like, Michael B. Jordan is using now he could make anything. Yeah. And he's making this. I, it fills my spirit. Yeah. Yeah. I also, again, like in the vein of, like, making new interesting things, like, yes, technically, Ryan Cougler making Animorphs is yet another, like, taking a thing from the 90s and doing it again.

And we have been in a churn of 90s remakes for quite some time now. But again, Ryan Cougler is so incredibly creative. And it sounds like the animorphs have such an interesting, like, the them article is just like, their allegories about being trans. Like, and I don't know because I haven't read them. But like the fact that there's so much like to explore in these YA books. So much. And yeah, I think same thing with Michael B. Jordan taking on fourth wing. It's like I, yeah, I just, you know, I know we already talked about the Harry Potter reboot,

but it's just like, what if we tried something new, something different, something challenging? And like that was something we were talking about about with the drama too. Like without getting too into it or without spoiling it. Like there is, I think that that in culture there's been sometimes a bit of an overcorrection to having like very clear cut good and bad. And like there's been a lot of discourse around the pit this season of like, oh, Dr. Robbie like is like a not a good guy. And it's like not all characters have to be good guy. Not all good characters have to be good people. He's a complex character that's a part of exploring the different facets of the sense of self.

Like, aren't we all different in different situations? And shouldn't that be explored? Especially like for the whole second season of the pit where he, it's one day. Right. He's having a bad day. It's like you also like he's about to go on vacation. You will know what it is the day before you leave to go on vacation from your job. You know you have so much shit.

You got. to get in the can. You got so much of it. You got to get done. You got to be packing. You got to be getting right. You're thinking about it. So while all this is happening, he's also thinking about all the other shit he's

got to get done. Right. Right. And it just like, I think that, you know, I know that I was never a Harry Potter fan from before, but it just seems like, like, they're the, the amount of, like, how much culture can we milk out of these texts as opposed to, like, what if we explored other texts? And especially maybe texts that are more interesting or better.

Like, different, like, have a, you know, better written, perhaps, or have more complex characters or whatever. Right. But I also feel like they tried, they already did that and explored, like, the fantastic beast and, like, they did all of that. Right. And you know what? They all right. Right. So, why are they still doing?

Like, so then they're like, you know what? All those other ones sucks. So I just got already made. I'm sorry. You obviously, I'm filled with contempt about it. I'm, and every time I see the trailer again, I'm just like, get it off my script. And you know someone, and I loved it. Yeah.

And I know that we can separate the art from the art. Like I know, but not this one. Right. Not this one. Right. And I don't mean to overstep and be like, they're not good books because maybe they are. No, I enjoy. I enjoyed the book.

I liked the books. I liked them when I read them when I was young. Right. I support people that find a lot of solace and like, and I really got lost in those books. It was a huge shelter for my vulnerable. spirit back in the day. Yeah. And, but J.K. Rowling is a piece of garbage. Yeah. Yeah. She is just, is just, she's a garbage person. Irredeemable. And she has specifically articulated that all the money she gets from these projects is funding her one woman crusade. Funding her actual legitimate government crusade

to ruin the lives. To eradicate trans people. So just remember that. The fact that she says it, oh, God, it makes me, I'm like, then I will never buy an third person ever again in my life. Right, right. And it really, it's that triple, that's why I get upset with the John Lithgow when he's like, maybe she's been misinterpreted. She's not being misinterpreted. She's openly saying, you are funding me continuing to fight trans people. And I need people to, if you have never looked into this, that is, I'm not being hyperbolic.

we're not, like, this is genuinely what she has said. Right. So. And it's, and it's tricky, right? Because we talk on the show all the time about how like, like, like, if we on page seven only talked about people who were like always good and never like real, like creators, authors, you know, directors, actors who like were never bad and like only good men, never bad men, it would be like a very, it would the show would be, it's difficult.

Shorter. Very, very short. Yes. It would be a couple minute weekly update. Oh, those couple of ones out there are doing fine. So you're next week. Still good. Still fighting the fight.

All right. Let's continue. Jane Fonda. Yep. Still looking great out there. All right. Let's continue. Yeah.

John Cusack sticking to it. He's doing it. I feel like we are trying to, you know, talk about culture in a way that embraces like the ambiguity of like, you know, who people are in 2026. But then conversely, like, again, with a third. thing with the drama, and this is a little bit of a different thing than the Harry Potter, like, what's bad about JK Rowling. But like the, conversely, like, the reason I brought up the pit is that I think that there some, the, I don't know if it's, if it's, you know, cancel culture or whatever, like the, the,

the drive to like, identify forces in society that are good and forces in society that are bad, I think sometimes that's leading to an overcorrection where you just want characters that are good and characters that are bad instead of exploring the ambiguity of, of the discomfort of not knowing what's good or bad. And that is what you said is interesting about the drama. Right. And I, because I have read a lot of the backlash about it. There's backlash about lots of it and a lot of what the twist is.

But really, I even hate saying the word twist. It's just the plot of the movie. It's literally just what the movie. And anyone that saw the teaser, even the teaser trailer or the, like the trailer, we all know that Zendaya and Robert Pattinson aren't going to make a runaway bride, right? It's like, it doesn't look like a wrong. It's like, it's not looking like a rom. Like, you do understand that it's going to be an interesting take on a story, right? Yeah. And on one hand, people are upset about that. And then on the other hand, people are upset that with whatever the plot is,

that it was showing, I guess I will say, showing Zendaya in a certain light, that they were like, they shouldn't do that to Zendaya. Which is such an interesting response to, like she's an actor. Like, it's an actor playing a complicated character. Yes, it's, yes, it's not, it is, and it's not even about gender. Right. They don't even bring that into what the discussion is with it. and but people are like

She wouldn't but he would and it's like don't get me wrong I understand a lot of us are having a lot of issues with specific

horrific white cis men all right but in this case also sometimes Zendaya can be a morally great character as well

right again it's just like moral ambiguity is what makes the stories interesting the writing that's what makes it worth writing

right? And it is something that like whether you hated or loved this movie or you just felt meh about it, it was certainly something that I hadn't seen. It was certainly something from a perspective that I haven't talked about. I, Jeff and I did talk a lot about it afterwards and had to have the conversation of like, I think I loved that. You know, it's like when you have to talk it through and afterwards be like, yeah, no, I think I love that. But just because it was something that they're making choices with. Yeah. And also, but that's what A24, you know, that's what we've come to expect from A24.

That you know it's going to be, you're just like, oh, well, it's probably going to be good. Right, right. Yeah. I keep, and I keep thinking about the pit too because I feel like I saw a very funny TikTok about the pit where it's like the writer's room at the pit, making sure the audience knows they're liberal. And it's like, you know, oh, ICE is here. We don't support ICE. And it'd be like, oh, this patient's not vaccinated. Vaccines are safe.

And like, kind of going through some of the like more heavy-handed messaging. Although that whole insurance thing really, like, I, it hurt me in a chest. Like that, all that stuff. And it's well done. Even like it's like, it is well done. I think that's the thing. Like the morals of the pit are clear, but also well done. And that, and I think in season one, it was just like, wow, look at this like,

really interesting story that also has these like political ideas that are being expressed really well. And then in season two, the characters are getting more complicated. And that is creating discomfort in people because it's like, I just want this to be like a, the story with the same, you know, what made me feel good about it in season one. And yeah, I think it's just, it's interesting to watch people's like resistance to, to making people a little bad. Character is a little bad. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. I'm trying to look up just, sorry, speaking of the pit, I was looking up the name of the Broadway,

because now we've talked about the pit so much that Issa Brioz has been all over my algo. I don't know if you've seen any of the clips of Issa Brioz in as she plays Connie Francis in Just in Time. What a performer! I'm so happy for her. Oh my God. And especially like in this season where she is,

certainly going through a lot in the show and a lot of stuff behind the scenes obviously that they're not showing that she's dealing with mentally but then to see her shine as Connie Francis on the stage I'm just like I'm just so it's one of those where I know I'm not

I'm not a parent but then you like watch them I'm like I'm so happy fall oh my God speaking of did you see Mark Ballas joined Whitney Levitt on Broadway for Chicago Yes, yes. And I saw the video of him, which again, Mark Ballas from Dancing with the Stars, who was her partner on Dancing with the Stars, has joined her in Chicago.

And I am also so happy for them. I know. I'm really happy with them too. And he's playing the lawyer. Yeah, it's, oh, I'm, I am very happy for them. Yeah. And I did finish. Oh, my God.

I did. I finished Mormon wives. And, yeah, you know, obviously. And you're desperate for a reunion. We're never going to get it, MJ, because now they're really just moving right along. And they're just like, but did you see Jen Affleck is having a spin-off? And it's just like, and they're like, but do you see Whitney is doing that? It's like, you all know what we want.

And we want to see how it's all falling apart. Give us the reunion. But they won't film. They will not film. They won't do it. And talk about moral ambiguity. I mean, Whitney ends up being the most interesting person from Secret Lives and Mormon Wives because she started off as the villain.

and it kind of ends up as the hero, but also is still like a little bit of a bitch. And it's like watching her arc in season four be like, are we happy for you that you basically, like the full on in the beginning of season four, she's like everyone, or no, the beginning of season three.

She's like, everyone thinks I'm back here because of, I want to be on dancing with the stars. They're not wrong. And then there's a pause. And she goes, they're right. At least she's not,

but again, you know here, it's why we love our Mariah Carey's. We love a. openly bitchy diva. Yeah. Sure. Yeah. The other day was telling me, oh my God, Adam was telling me

about this video of Mariah Carey at the grocery store. And it was so funny because you could tell like, when was the last time this bitch was at a fucking grocery store? What's she doing at the grocery store? It was like, it was like, it was an ad or something. It was like some, I don't know, it was some video that and like, But you could tell that she's like, nobody looks good in this grocery store lighting. But we know that she has in her contracts that she is not to be seen under fluorescent lighting.

So you also know that there are people there desperately trying to light her, trying to make her look good. And she's still not happy. And she's just, I really don't think she's been in a grocery store in 40 years. Oh, yeah. I genuinely, like, it's just such a, it made. me think of like Ryan Gosling meeting the the other alien and Project Hail Mary. Like I feel like it was just like, what is this? Rosser Estor.

Wait, it doesn't get delivered to my house. I don't understand. Well, and she just listed her. Drop her right in it. That's, she just listed her penthouse for $27 million. Wow. The one that she shared with Nick Cannon? I, I, I, her 27 million, her, her, her, NYC penthouse triple.

I'll bet that's a nice house. Oh my God. She made an Easter appearance at a church. Yeah, for Senator Warlock. I know. She's been busy. She must be exhausted. Someone must not have thawed her or maybe thought her too well.

Maybe this is the problem. She won't get back in the ice. Oh, God, we got to sedate her. We got to put her down. We've got to get her back in the ice, everybody. You know the timeline can't handle her out of the ice for too long. Well, she always has to reemerge around Easter because Nick Cannon always puts on that terrifying Easter costume

and visits all 14 of his children. Yeah, so she does have to kind of show up, show out for Easter a little bit and she'd be like, oh, heroes, wait to see what I do. You know. Talking about JC, that is. But also, I imagine, I wonder how Mariah Carey, you know, the fact that I always think about

that he had the Mariah huge tattoo that was across Nick Cannon's back, that he had replaced with a full crucifixion of Gene. Jesus Christ on his back, like he was carrying the cross of Jesus Christ. And how, I, I really think about that too often. I think about it far too, like, it is just such a, such a choice. And I, don't get me wrong, I love a cover up. I love what they've been doing with, like, what do they call them, like, like, blasters or whatever, where you, like, cover up the tattoos and you make them into

other, love it. That is just such a, yeah. But maybe that's why he puts on the bunny, horrific funny costume every year, so to hide the corpse of Christ that lives on his back from all of his children. This year was the first year by children asked me, how did Jesus die? Interesting. We all froze at our tracks. Like, how much detail do you want to know? Interesting. What did you say? It was, what did I say? Did you explain the idea of crucifixion and how, I mean, scary. It's scary. I really, like, it's, I used to be very very. I used to be very very scared of being crucified when I was a young Catholic. Yeah, I grew up, I didn't even grow up Catholic, but I grew up surrounded by Catholicism.

So like my grandma's house had like this detailed, detailed crucifixion that I loved to stare at. Oh, they love it. They're bloodier and the more in pain he is. They're just like, yeah, yeah, let me feel it. Yeah, exactly. So yeah, they said, how did he die? And I gave him the broad strokes. I didn't go into detail, but did you bring up the cave? Like, did you bring up all that? Like, did you bring up, like, the side? Did you bring up that? Do you bring up the nails?

Did you bring up stigmata at all? I didn't bring up the nails. Honestly, though, I bet they might be into stigmata. I mean, because I feel like it's the coolest part. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it's tough to know how, you know, it's really one of those things that you've never think twice about because you grew up with it. And then you're like, how do I explain that they tortured the alleged son of God to the six

and seven-year-old? Yeah, I didn't bring up the cave. I really tried to keep it pretty general. But also, you know, we had just been to Passover and Passover. You know, there's the boils and the, and the, the, the, the lights and the death of the first sport. Oh, yeah. So it's a lot of darkness at this time of bright, bright, you know. What did they think of the pestilence?

Like, were they fine with all of that? Were they into frogs? Frogs from the sky? Yeah, frogs. Oh, yeah. They love the plagues because the family that we go to for Passover, they have a lot of fun, like, masks of all the different, um, that different plagues. Sater is a great fucking time. I love it.

I love the Sater. a sater. I love. I love the community aspect of a sater. I like that often, like all the sadres, maybe it's just because we're all performers that we all come and like the perform, the different parts of it and everybody like presents the dairy. It's the best. It's, it's, and it truly is the best. But there's always these masks and the masks are like, you know, lice and boils and everything. And then this year there was a mask. We couldn't figure out what it was. It looked like a human with exes for eyes. And then one of the people goes, It's the death of the firstborn.

This is a dead baby mask. Dead babies in chat. It's a dead baby mask. Who got to make the dead baby mask? And I feel like every year you should add more like shackles and chains to the dead baby mask. Like they're Marley and Marley from Muppet Christmas Carol. Yes. Yeah.

So, yeah, between explaining the plagues and then explaining the death and resurrection of Jesus, it's, yeah, been a banner week here. Just want you, I hope, though, if you're going to be talking about current things with the kids, at least show them. I just want, I know we got to end this episode, but show them the pictures coming in from Artemis too. We're watching. Oh, my God. So cool. This is crazy.

So they have gone what further than any human has ever gone since 1969 or something? Like, and it is so crazy. These are the first images of the. earth and the moon since then. It's, speaking of Easter, that guy, that astronaut's like, did you see the clip? Oh my God, naming the crater after his dead wife? Well, that, that, yes. Oh, my God.

But also, they were being interviewed on Easter and the newscaster was like, do you have any, like, message about it being Easter morning? And the astronaut was like, well, you know, the world is full of people with all sorts of different beliefs. And whether or not you believe in God, he's just like, I, to be here and to look down at Earth and to realize that, like, whatever happened to have a. us here. Like we are, we get to be here and we get to live on this thing. In all of the magnitude of space, we are lucky enough to live here. We are so special. I have been crying, crying,

between the Project Hail Mary and this. And I was just like, I was like, I wish I could talk to the astronauts. And I wrote down, Jeff just said, if you're pure of heart, the astronauts can hear you. And is it, Jeff, is that true? Am I pure of heart? Can the Astronauts hear me? I hope they can hear me. Thank you, Ashtra. But also, we started this new, I don't know if it's like a new guy at NASA. It's crazy.

They are putting more, they are having like boots on the moon by 2028 again. They want, and then every six months more boots on the moon. Like they are going to be, we're taking the moon in the next eight years. and it is fascinating. I am just so, I'm gripped by it. And watching, I don't know if it's all going to turn out the way that it should. But, you know, as someone that used to love, I wanted to be a meteorologist and was so upset and didn't go down that path because of all of the NASA funding being cut. And everything is such a absolute nightmare right now.

and to see Artemis 2 do this, it is giving, like, I'm like, this is real life the project, Hail Mary, that is given any kind of hope about anything. It's so cool. And also to explain, because we've, I've explained Elon Musk and SpaceX to them and why we don't, I'm like, you know, we're not, they're not colonizing the moon. They're not trying to take it and say it's theirs. They're trying to learn and discover and say this is for all. But also before other people.

Yeah. Yeah, that right. They'd like to do it before some other people, sure. There's some nationalism to it, for sure. But yeah, no, they did a video. I just saw the video today. They're doing wrestling moves with each other because they're floating around and they're doing a bunch of WWE, like pretend wrestling with each other.

Man, it's so good. If you're sad, Artemis II will cure what ails you. If I'm telling y'all, if you're sad, look up the photos, look up like going through, just, God. Yeah. If you're pure of heart, the astronauts can hear you and don't forget that. I don't know if we're pure of heart anymore because we turn number blocks sexy, but it's okay. I think we're still pure of heart.

It's not my fault that that seven's looking down at me from heaven. I'm sorry. Maybe take a couple of those rainbow blocks out of there, and I am victim blaming. It's seven. It's block seven's fault. And it's our fault that this show is still going. Thank you, everybody, for hanging out with us today. while we just, oh, we were just talking ins and outs of all kinds of television and we're all

across the board. Don't worry. Next week, I will have absorbed so much of love overboard. And I am going to remember that it's called love overboard and not just call it love boat or love island or boat show or, which is all of the ways in which I've referred to it in the last 24 hours because I keep forgetting that it's called love overboard. It's very, too many boat shows, too many boat shows. But this only one has a plank and it's this one. And it's this one. I can't wait to watch all of them dressed to the nines being thrown into the Mediterranean Sea.

You know, this is what makes us, this is what's going to heal us. This is what makes us all members of Earth. Yep. And this is all what puts us on the same side, right? Everyone, we're all in the same side because we all want to watch love overboard. Anyway, y'all, have. a beautiful, beautiful week. I hope that you are just,

you know, putting smiles out there. Remember, you can try to make anybody smile, but we have to not be creepy about it. Thank you so much for listening. My name is Jackie Zabrowski. You can find me on Instagram at Jack That Worm. And I'm going to be posting

a lot more. I want your info. I want your feedback on some cryptid fuck world. And I am heavily in the world of writing a full cryptid fuck game. So if you want to give me any of your feedback, follow me on Instagram at Jack That Worm. And I'm going to be showing as we work on the iterations of all of the characters, because we do want the other monster lovers out there. We want you to feel stated too.

So come on by Jack That Worm. And don't forget, while you're on your way, stop at patreon.com slash page 7 podcast. It's next week. It's next week is the episode. just as a reminder. And just for everyone to be aware, season six, episode 19 of Bucky. Is the episode that we also have the rage talk back afterwards. And it is, remember, you don't have to rewatch it with us. Yeah, for real.

If you don't want to rewatch it, you do not have to. You can hear us talk about our thoughts about it without watching it. We did an extra bonus segment of talking about it because it was so it was so it. It was so upsetting. But yeah, that is a good thank you for the warning, Jackie. It really destabilized all of us. And I appreciate everyone in the Patreon also putting those comments in on this week's episode of just reminding each other that we're all in this together and you don't have

to watch it if you don't want to because according to MJ and I, we've stricken it. Yeah. We've stricken the moment. We took it out. It's not in the canon anymore. Not in our canon. So I guess you're going to have to look down somebody else's bear. MJ, would you like to share anything?

Thank you for your emails. Thank you for your patronage. We love you guys. Thank you for listening. Shall we sing the song? Let's do it. Todd'll be better. A second time round.

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