Page 7 - Vow Renewal - Weird and Annoying w/ Marcus Parks

Episode Date: March 13, 2025

This week on Page 7 VR MJ and Jackie are reunited with the dulcet toned Marcus Parks, on the 15th(!!) anniversary of the network, to goss' 'bout his concerns over Holden's taste in music (or lack thereof), The Wiggles staying power as they collab with Orville Peck on a new song called 'Friend of Dorothy", Marcus gets to be among the first to hear the new HAWT FLASH song, Adrien Brody tossin' gum and paintin' sicc a$$ guns, Jackie enters a tear soaked journey into The Pitt, Marcus gives an update on his 90 Day and Reality TV viewing habits as well as how much Reality TV has changed since his time on P7 (or even just in the last 2 years), someone or something in California wants everyone to eat Nutria and we've got some thoughts on what's behind it, Marcus triumphantly sounds off THE LIST, which is full of discontinued fan favorite products, da Oscarz Edition Blindz, TW for misophonia as JACKIES SNACKIES RETURNS with special guest Marcus! That plus even more on this weeks' Page 7 VR!  Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast  Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Page 7 ad-free.Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

I have had this song stuck in my head, and maybe I'm about to get it stuck into yours, and I don't know if you can fill in the trumpets. Fill it all in with your mind's eye, because I get over you. I know I will. I pretend my chips not sinking, and I tell myself I'm over here, because I'm the king of wishful thinking. Yes, the little Michael McDonald Just a little bit there in the end Thank you guys so much

Welcome to page 7 Don't worry, MJ was not helping me sing But a one Marcus Parks was That's right The thing is I do have a baritone voice But my scene voice is the soprano You gotta get it up there And it was not me

Whoa It was not me It was not MJ Although I do have a notably deep voice We are joined by a very important guest today in the studio. You may remember him as the co-host of this show for the first eight years. You may remember him from the conversation about the board game, Don't Wake Daddy. You may also know him as the co-host of the last podcast on the left and no dogs in space. And we are so

thrilled to have him here today. Marcus Parks, welcome back. Welcome. I was on the show for eight years. Eight years. My. Yeah. Go. Yeah. For quite some time, Marcus. How many years do you remember? Like, I thought it was like three and three. a half. No, dude. We did it together for a very long time. And it's really insane to think. We were talking about this a little bit last week because of the many eras that we have

gone through like a little bit of Tay, you know, except for some reason we're not dating the quarterback. And I don't know why they're never asking us out on any dates. It's the only difference between MJ and I and Taylor Swift, though. Yeah, I would have said that too. Thank you. Thank you for understanding us. No, but the Marcus era was long and vibrant.

but we only remember part of it. Of course. I mean, you know, this year is the 15th anniversary of the network. It certainly is, and this is our 15th year as well, coinciding. My God. Man, maybe we've been doing this for a very long time, but lots has changed here at the network. Now, Marcus, I know that there's not a lot that we do, I dare say, remember about what happened during those eight years. I can't emphasize enough how drunk we were.

It's hazy years to say the least. easy years. In fact, definitely thinking of like the don't wake daddy. You even just said that MJ and I felt like all these neurons started firing in my brain. While I was driving here, I remembered the November rain moment that we had when you

guys just didn't understand how I didn't know the song November rain. And I'm going to tell you, Marcus, I think it's been 10 years since that moment and I still couldn't pick it out of a paper bag. What? November Rain is one of the most recognizable classic rock songs of all time.

Try doing it. Just give me a... And I've got no fail to break in. And I got to wit how do I drive? But I'm the king of no family. And that's all that's happening in my head. Close enough. Do you remember, Marcus, that you texted Henry and you were like, you have been derelict in your brother duties for Jackie not knowing this.

You texted him in real time on the show. Yes. That was definitely a time when I took guns. and roses far more seriously than I take it now. Oh, you don't do that anymore. Well, at this point, I still appreciate guns and roses very much. I appreciate them as the entity that they were, as the cultural force that they were, you know, how influential they were to culture at the time.

But then as we've gotten further and further from like the late 80s and the early 90s. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm pretty sure that was 10 years ago. As far as I'm concerned, I'm not getting. older, I keep saying I'm Benjamin Button. I even threatened my husband this morning that one day he was going to wake up next to a baby because I'm getting so young

and he said, please don't say that. I don't find it funny at all. I'm so old, but I'm so young. He loves it. Guns and Roses does not have the cultural relevance. The same power. It definitely did not stay.

Yeah, like going back and like I still love to the thing is about it. You know what it is? I don't drink as much as I used to. And Guns and Roses was a band that I would drink a lot and then listen to that band after about seven or eight beers, and it would be fantastic. And I don't have that anymore. Like, I don't have that, like, alcoholic hole to fall into

where Guns and Roses is such a nice warm blanket. It is. It really is. And, man, speaking of nice, warm blankets, I am getting a little hot. Uh-oh. I need a hot flash, MJ, this field. I need a hot flash jacket tonight.

Yes, thank you guys so much for your. We got some submittals. Submittles? That were many submissions is the word. We've got some submittals. And a lot of people said we're coming up with a hot flash segment song. We needed a song. And lots of people went the route of Donna Summers hot stuff.

And I can't believe we didn't think about it in the first place. Special shout-out. To the person who... Now you got me into Michael. The person who did... The reason that Donna Summers won is because we got multiple suggestions for her. But I do want to shout out the person who sent me a voice memo of themselves trying to sing Hot Flash to the tune of Chapels Hot to Go, but it doesn't work with the lettering.

And so she just kept trying and misspelling hot. And it was a really fun voice. memo to receive. So I want to say thank you and everyone else's suggestions. We got a lot of suggestions. But as soon as we received multiple suggestions for Donna Summers, we had to give it up to her. And, you know, the man leaves the show. And we immediately start talking about menopausal symptoms. And I just want to say that... Perry Menopausal, please. Can we please? Let the Perry on there, please. Perry Menopausal. So welcome back, Marcus.

Thank you. I'm glad I showed up for the menopause. Perry menopause. Thank you. Excuse me. Barry. H-O-T-F-L. Yeah. It doesn't work. Because you're getting into chapel.

Well, I mean, I have listened to Chapel Rowans, just because it's, you know, everyone's talking about Chapar-Rowans. Like, all right, I'll check it out. It's all right. Yeah. Yeah. It's all right. I mean, I would dare say towards you, it's no Orville Peck.

Have you gotten into Orville Peck? I'm not a big Orville Peck guy. Really? Yeah. Wow. Wow. Well, you're not going to love my Hot Flash. because, well, how do you feel about the wiggles?

How do you feel about the wiggles? I also, I guess, you know what? Honestly, I think I feel the same about the wiggles as I do about Chaparone. It's pretty good. Pretty good. Really? Yeah.

They put a lot of work in. They do. I respect them. They're doing interesting things. I think that's a fine. I can live with that analogy. The wiggles, I feel similarly. They are not a children's music

that my household has gotten into. Dare I say, my kids listen to much more Chapelrone than they do the wiggles. But my half-hash. to flex, MJ. I don't know. I felt that from the year. Okay.

I guess they're real cool. Well, right now they are, but again, you have to remember the relief I am from being out of the Frozen and Frozen 2 soundtrack era. Sure. The thrill of being in the Chapel Rhone and Sound of Music soundtrack era is I do have to brag about it. But Holden loves the Wiggles. He tuned us into the Wiggles and the, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Separate from being a father. He was always into the wiggles. Actually, there was the one wiggle that he really wanted to have sex with. Surprise. But also... Just a quick thing about Holden, was he just pretending to have good taste in music for so many years? Yeah, okay, okay.

Those were his jugs a wine era holding. So when he's drinking Carlo Rossi, he knows what's good. But, man, on Fridays, sometimes... We sometimes make fun of him because he's... He's been a big Benson Boone fan, which I don't know if you know of Benson Boone. No clue. You would know it if you heard it. It's very imagined dragons.

It's very beautiful, beautiful. He was pretending. Yes. It's an impossible song to sing that I've seen several times on the show. He was pretending. That whole time. But also, I will say, I do not have good taste in music. Me neither.

You know this. I've never pretended to have a good taste in music, though. And I think that's the difference. I think I can go after somebody if they're like, but I have great taste of music. But it's like, no, no, no. You can come at me all you want. I know I don't have great taste in music.

I'm okay with that. I would never come at either one of you. I appreciate it. I appreciate that. I come a holland. I was in a band with the motherfucker for 10 years. You can come at a Horton. I can come a hold on.

You earned that, right. Well, the Wiggles have been compared by, I think, either Holden or a listener to the Fleetwood Mac of Children's Music. because they have an intense love triangle within the Wiggles that we have unpacked a couple of times on the show. Really crazy. We're not here to talk about the rumors era of the Wiggles. We are here to talk about the song that they just put out in collaboration with Orville Peck called Friends of Dorothy. And it's Orville Peck being gay.

And they're singing about a dinosaur named Dorothy. But it's also about being gay. And it's just absolute perfection. and I'm a big Orville guy and so this was a collaboration where I was perhaps a little bit more excited for Orville than for the Wiggles themselves

but it is, this is a band where you tap there's an iceberg underneath this right, there is lower to the Wiggles lots of feelings about the way. Albums, decades worth of albums. Yeah. Are they Australian? Indeed.

Yes. Yeah, okay. All right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know that. Yeah, good question. I think you might loo. love the wiggles. I will say the wiggles are undeniable for their staying power. Of course. I mean, they've been around for, like you just said, MJ, dropped so many albums.

This is such a great collab. And I do feel like it ignited every single one of us in understanding that we all learn the phrase, friend of Dorothy from the movie Clueless. And which I remember specifically asking my mom what friend of Dorothy meant because of that movie. And I know I'm not the only person that went through that. Now, maybe you were a little old by that point, Marcus. When Clueless came out? Yeah, to learn that phrase that. Clueless is what, 96?

96. Maybe. Yeah, 96, 97. We got to remember, like, I grew up in rural Texas, so there wasn't a whole lot of talk about Friends of Dorothy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it might have just gone straight over my head. I think I might have heard of Friends of Dorothy. Man, might have been Golden Girls.

Uh-huh. That would also, yeah, because I did watch. Do they make a cheek joke about being a friend? of Dorothy in the show? I think so. Oh, that's fun. Actually, we were watching an episode like yesterday

because Caroline's a massive golden girls. Love golden girls. And sometimes we just kind of put it on before, like, while we're making dinner. And I believe there was a friends of Dorothy. No, it was a joke about what's next, like, oh, a gay theater director, what's next? A black man in the NBA?

It was one of those. Oh, Estelle. She's always coming. Coming out with the hard ones. It was a Dorothy. It was a Dorothy. But it was a... But yeah, they did have a lot of those jokes,

a lot of coded stuff for gay men and golden girls. So I would imagine that's where I first started. Carolina has tried to sell me on the Golden Girls multiple. And I say try to sell, not because it's not an easy sell. I want it. I just feel like every time I try to get into it, it makes me so sad that they're supposed to be in their 50s. That it's just like my...

I think it makes my eyes bleed. Are they supposed to be in their... I thought they were all in their 60s. I thought they were all in their 50s. Isn't that like I thought I saw the memes and hurts my dreams? No, I think they're in their 60s and 70s. Okay.

I'm looking it up. I'm looking at it up. How old are the Wiggles? No, how old are the Golden Girls, Google? I know I've been Googling the Wiggles a lot today. Based on evidence presented by the ladies themselves in the show, Dorothy and Rose are 55. Blanche is in her early 50s, and Sophia is 80s.

My husband could be in the golden girl. Well, just remember, people didn't drink as much water back then. That's true. And people smoked a lot. Yes. And people aged much faster. Also, I've been talking about this. I recently was, my mom and I've been talking about skin care because my mom was like,

we were never told to put anything on our, like, she's like, you have to remember, we were told to put Criscoe on our bodies. In the sun. Like, we all were putting Chris. to go out in the sun to literally bake yourself. So it's like, of course our faces are going to look different than what you guys. It's like, you started putting creams on your face. Yeah, like 10 years ago.

Yeah. So I got to keep a supple. Keep it safe. Just like the diamonds. Now, before you move up, Jackie, I just want to make sure we get the full quote from Clueless in there. The quote, it is from Murray, who is Dee's boyfriend. And he is talking about Christian, the boy that Cher has a crush on. And he says he's a disco dancing, Oscar Wild Reading.

stricent ticket holding friend of Dorothy, know what I'm saying? And I guarantee you I got zero of those references in 1997. Absolutely zero of them. But, you know, that's why you ask. And then you learn these things. And as someone that has loved Barry Manilow for a long time, I'm surprised I didn't know that phrase before then.

But it did drop in 1995, so that would make more sense because I wasn't eight years old. Yeah, 95. Yeah, 95 earlier than I thought. Yeah. So, but that's the thing is that at the time, you did believe, because of your mother that Barry Manilow was the straightest confirmed bachelor on her. Yeah, he was just waiting for Pete. You know, it's like, I understand that Barry Manelow's still waiting for me.

And I'm coming, Barry. Just hold down the Fort in Vegas for me, baby. I'll be there soon. I'll be brushing his hair until he dies. And, you know, I'll be there to help him take off his shoes. Make sure that his Botox appointments come on time. And we'll both be, oh, my God, think of how plastic we could become together. Oh, you'll both be so.

tight. I guess. Carolized with tightness. Yes, that's all I want. In every conflict, there's at least one bitch. A huge bitch, a silly bitch. A little baby bitch, a raggedy bitch. But sometimes it's unclear who the bitch is.

I'm Kara Klank. And I'm Jackie Zabrowski. And on our new Colin Advice podcast, we're going to help you figure out who's the bitch. We want to hear your problems, dilemmas, and quandary. No topic is off limits. Does your co-worker flirt with the boss to get ahead? Is your bestie having her destination wedding on a holiday weekend?

Is your therapist being clingy? Does your friend keep bringing her toddler to adult parties? Come on, there's definitely a bitch in your life, and we want to hear about it. You can email us, DM us, leave us a voicemail, and even call in live to talk to us in person about the alleged bitch in your life. Just go to who's the bitch.com for all the ways you can contact us. New episodes drop every Wednesday starting in October on The Last Podcast Network, so subscribe now on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen. And tune in to our live stream kickoff on September 30th on the Last Podcast Network Twitch channel,

where we'll be taking your calls live on air. Help us, help you figure out who's the bitch. But I guess I'm paralyzed by greatness because we're talking about Adrian Brody's artwork. So he does things like, um, Brody Bucks hooked on it on the Starbucks sign. And he's doing just weird other choices. Big neon signs. Lots of though.

What I'm not showing you right now, Marcus, is there are lots of things with guns on them, just big guns, like neon guns shooting and stuff like that. Why is he doing this? Is it because he's Popsie to Weinstein's kids? Like, I feel like it's got something to do with him being called Popsie.

Don't get me wrong. Love the name Popsie. Popsie's fine. I do think that is a fun thing to call like a step Popsie. But I'm scared of Adrian Brody, especially because of the might that he had to have a five and a half minute long Oscar acceptance speech. Is that how long it was? Five and a half minutes longest in history. Fairly shorter than the Brutalist is what I've heard.

Which I know you love the Brutals. We don't feel the same, Marcus. I adored it. I thought it was phantom. I mean, Edwin watched it in the theater. We had a guy, we both ate two hot dogs because it was so long. Because it's so long. At the time.

At least there's an intermission. Yeah, the intermission's key. Yes. Getting your second hot dog during the intermission. I will say I did agree with you about Guy Pearce though. Guy Pearce very, very, very good in the movie. Adrian Brody, I'm just asleep. Well, he's just playing that.

He's doing the Adrian Brody Oscar thing. Oh, my man, Amorgas. I jump up on the seat, Marcus. Like, I just, you met him. I'll never forget life is beautiful. We'll never all forget. That was Roberto Benini. Sorry. I'm Italian watching them.

Yeah, you're confusing the pianist with Life is Beautiful. Life is Beautiful. Much more fun. It's still the same accent, I get, like, kind of sort of, because I can imagine him and the bootles going, I'm a so sad. I'm so sad. My abydings, they are beautiful and all you had also a bit ugly. Because that's the thing Architecturally, like I know that the movie was just, and I come out saying this,

the movie was probably too smart, it was smart in ways that I'll never understand that probably add to its great. And I'm not saying that it was not a very well-made movie. It just did get to a point that I was like, okay, all right. We can wrap this up here, guys. We can just pop right through here. But, you know, Adrian Brody's artwork is being branded horrendous and ugly.

And I think that that just kind of goes hand in hand with him throwing his gum towards his wife in front of everybody. That's very weird, because I'm a gum chewer myself, big on the Nicorette, constantly chomping on it all the time. I would not throw my gum. Ugh. Jackie just showed me him in front of his guns, his gun paintings. Gun paintings, which is just like, like splattered paint on top of some guns on a wall. And he's all, but he's also got, he's wearing sunglasses, a black beanie, and a vest. Here's the choice.

It's, uh, this man decided to make one great movie in the early 2000s, I believe was when the pianist came out and then like be weird and annoying for 20 years and then come back and make another great movie. I know he's made other things, okay? But I just, the striking, like, I have closed up shop for Adrian Brody. It's gone. The love is gone. And I'm now, thanks to you, Marcus, had discovered this weekend by watching the pit, that my shop is open for Noah Wiley. That crush, 48 years, strong.

I know we're not even getting into slipping and sliding and gushing and sploogin and sphusion. But I tell you what, all right, Marcus Parks, you gave MJ and I a gift, and you didn't even know it. Oh, you guys hadn't seen the pit yet? Last week, MJ and I were both just talking about it. I was like, I know we need to get into the pit. We got to get into the pit. I know that we need to do it.

But I heard about the lawsuits. We were both being haters, to be honest. And we will talk about the lawsuit in just a moment. But Marcus, you opened up. Thank you. So we hit up Marcus last week and we're like, Marcus, what have you been getting into right now? We want to like make sure we're watching some of the same stuff

so we can get into some similar things. And Marcus came out the gate telling us both to watch the pit. Marcus, I started Friday night and I watched 10 full episodes by last night. I cried all weekend. I cried all weekend long, but also no Wiley. That's me. I'm gone. I was just taking on a slip and slide down a mountain. I'm on Mount Everest somewhere. Don't try and find me. I am a corpse and I'm fine with it. Yes. The pianist was from 2002. That was what my crush on Adrian Brody started. It is RIP. It died in 2025. Dead. E.R. started in 1994. That crush is 31 years old and apparently going. I have not thought about Noah Wiley since E.R. But bro, he's so good.

Yeah, I mean, the pit is incredible. I'm a little bit behind. I haven't like seen the entire season because we watch it like a couple of episodes at a time. Which is better for your mental health. Let's be honest. I'm much better for your mental health. Yeah, because that show is fucking intense. It's incredible. It's one of the best medical procedurals that I've ever seen. We're big medical procedural fans in our home. Both me and Caroline are massive fans. Medical procedural. She loves ER.

You know, we both love like Gray's Anatomy. Oh, don't throw away a Chicago Hope with the bathwater. Oh, get me that Christine body any day. And what I love about the pit is like, because Gray's Anatomy and ER are really good with the medical jargon. It's like, give me 15 of blood ox. Right, right, right. But the pit takes it to the next level. Wow.

It's they will, there'll be five minutes where it's nothing but medical jargon and it's like fucking ASMR. Yeah. It's fantastic. Well, also, it's crazy that we noticed pretty like much in the beginning that there are, there's no music. There's no soundtrack. There's not even a soundtrack over the opening. It is just stagnant right from one hour into the next because for those of you that don't know. And I need to also say, too, I am not coming from a home filled with people that love,

hospital procedural shows. Because you also get the gore. That's the thing. And I, so I loved ER. I was a big ER person, obviously in love with Noah Wiley, in love with all of them. Let's also, I mean, come on. And my husband was like, I won't, I don't care. I don't want to watch this.

It's just going to be sad. I don't want to watch, like, again, like the jargon. I don't really care. He's like, you know what it is? It's so overdramatic and it's so overdone. That's what I thought too upon, we all watched the three. of us. Like when I was staying at Jackie's house, we watched the trailer. And I was like, I've seen E.R. I've seen Noah Wiley be a compassionate doctor whose heart is one size too big for the job.

I don't need to see it again. I've already seen it, but that's not even his character, MJ. And that's what we learn over the time. That's not who he is. And I, we watch that first because I got him to watch it because I was like, Marcus said it was good. He's like, all right, if Marcus says it is good, then I will watch it. I was like, all right, and then that first episode, Bye, bye, everybody. We've just been living in the pit, and I don't know. And I've been doing this. I've been living a whole world, Marcus.

I don't know if you're aware if I've trapped you in a conversation of me talking about getting into the world of the real housewives. Because MJ and I have been on that track recently. And we have been, man, talk about it's a universe. It's a whole universe. It is a lot of like, like, and I love it. And it's all. that sound that becomes an ASMR because you can never really quite remember. It's like, oh, which one is screaming now?

I don't remember which one's upset with which one. And you just let it play. But there's Real Housewives of New York, there's 18 seasons out. So I've got some time to spend with some people. But I'm upset that the pit, I just watched the 10th episode. There's 15 episodes in the first season. There's not all the episodes are out yet. So we're getting more.

So it's not over yet. longer than a shift. It's because it's... Oh, is it? When you're not, not when you're in the pit, MJ. Not when you're in the pit. Not when your hospital is underfunded. Yes, a couple of things about it that are so cool. The chronology is cool.

So you start at 7 a.m. And then each episode is in real time, hour by hour. And unlike ER, I actually hadn't even noticed the music thing, but unlike ER, it's the drama is just purely from what you are seeing in front of you. There's really, it's not kind of cinematically

Michael Crichton, he presented that way, the way that ER was. Speaking of Michael Crichton, oh, you're going to bring Crichton into this? No, you're going to bring Crichton into this? Michael Creton's widows bringing himself into it. Whoa, RIP. But it's one of the things that's fun about it

is that there is like, I've now come across many TikTok doctors who are watching it and doing, like, posting themselves watching it and are saying how incredibly realistic it is, especially all the conversation, like the pressure that the ER getting about their patient satisfaction numbers. And the ER supervising doctor is like, well,

you need to hire more nurses because there's no beds to get people out of here too. And so it's all about like the framework is like the austerity and like starvation of this hospital and the ER trying to survive despite not having the resources, which just gives it a different, interesting, I think, like moral framework than ER, which I think, I mean, again, I love ER, but, and I haven't rewatched since, but I wasn't really getting any overarching. It was just like, an emergency room is full of beautiful moments. Beautiful drama.

Dr. Green's having trouble with his ex-wife again. Oh my God. Don't eat. But then that's the craziest part two, though, is that it never, because it's all trapped in one day, you're only finding out what you know about these people and their lives based on what they bring with them to work.

Yeah. Because so many people are much better at compartmental than others and that this has got to be a job that you have to learn how to properly compartmentalize. And I think they're really showing that in this because it's like what really comes through. You know, even when they introduce, and I don't think I'm giving anything away, they introduce the idea that Noah Wiley has a kid, but like very loosely and not in a saccharine way, not in a sit down like, son, how, how's everything go? Like it was all.

No, the kids showing up to pick up tickets. Right. Yeah, to a concert. And just like, hey, Dad, they just come in and they bounce right out. And that's it because that's what it would be in just a regular day at the office. And I just, there's so many character ups and it's so well written. But here's the thing. It's so well written that it's under fire by the Michael Crichton estate.

And I don't know if you've looked into this at all because this was part of the reason why. I heard about it and I didn't want to look into it. It's like I'm sick of this type of bullshit. It's very annoying. But this is the thing. And this is why I. I looked into it just a little bit more. Because the thing is that Michael Crichton's estate.

Now, Michael Crichton has passed, but his wife is still at the head of his estate. Michael Crichton, of course, the creator of ER. And so they were currently working on an unauthorized reboot of ER. They were already in talks with the same people to do it. And what happened is they canceled all of it moving forward. And then all of a sudden the pit came. came out with another one of the original executive producers of ER. Sure.

And one of those, and the longest running star of the one who was on ER, the longest. Exactly. Exactly. So they, so of course, the estate immediately went after them. And of course, Hulu and everybody's like, guys, this is very different from ER. Obviously, this is Dr. Robbie very different than Dr. John Carter. But he's a very similar character, I will say. Come on, he's Jewish.

He's Jewish. Come on, it's different. There's no Jewish man named John Carter. And he is old instead of young. That's different. So that's a change. But wow, is he old instead of young? Man. I guess I'm just, I just keep getting older and then they just keep getting older.

It's the opposite of like a, you know, like a. I keep getting older. They stay the same age. No, it's a different one. They keep getting older. and my taste keep evolving. Keep evolving. And man, I just like them

older and older and older. And then I looked at a picture of Dr. John Carter versus Dr. Robbie. And I was like, I mean, you couldn't even possibly compare. But again, we were watching this show. I was 10.

Thirsting for, you know, I mean, eventually Dr. Kovach, obviously. But then, and Dr. Carter. Oh, God. I forgot about Dr. Kovach. The one from Bosnia? Croatia?

Croatia. Croatia. And also the guy from practical magic. Yeah, because it was Croatia because it was during the No Boundaries War. Oh. Yeah, the last kid, the war that Pearl Jam put out that song for. So it did go there. That also, talk about going over my head.

That was not on my right. I don't think the, oh, the Pearl Jam song? Well, the Bosnian Wars in general that time period, I was like, what's going on? So I didn't really get that part. Yeah, I think I was, yeah, I was in like later. high school and all that happened. They did the last kiss. Yeah, the horrible song.

But it was somehow everywhere in a massive hit. I mean, it's Pearl Jim. How could it not be? Especially at that time when it was definitely more in the world of like a monoculture. That's something that we talk about a lot more with page seven now. It's just discussing how much different it is, especially we've been doing this for 15 years. Talk about what we've seen in the world of pop culture. and how it has changed just from when we started this show versus now and how like how much more diversified everything is.

I mean, it's fragmented. The entire culture is fragment. I mean, the quote that I just blew my mind or the thing that I think about a lot is a Chuck Klostroming quote. Chuck Klosserman, of course, it wrote like sex drugs and cocoa pops, massive great thinker on like pop culture. And he said the last time everybody agreed on one. thing was haya. Yeah. It was outcast hayas. That was like the end.

That was the last time that everybody agreed this is good. Like not just the hipsters, not just, you know, the housewives. 2003 makes sense. Yeah, not just the housewives, not just the hipters. Not everybody loves haya. Everybody agreed this song is good. We're going to listen to this song all the time. And we haven't agreed on anything sense.

As far as pop culture goes, as far as like this thing is good and I love this. We need more outcasts is what you're saying. We need even more from him, I guess. We need something new. I don't know. What's the great? You see, I was screaming yesterday that weed was the great unifier. Is weed not the great unifier?

Because I don't smoke that much weed. You smoke a little bit of weed, but not a whole lot. Weed, unfortunately, is not the great. I don't think there is a great uniar. I feel like Succession came close, but even succession, you know, you talk to people who, one of my friends writes for like a network procedural, and she was talking, and it's funny because I feel like if you talk to a lot of our peers about pick any random CBS or ABC network procedural, our peers might be less like, like, you know, millennials who consume a lot of streaming

content might be less likely to be excited about, for example, like the good doctor or something. But I think that those shows, their numbers are like factors, multiple, like so much more than a show like succession, right? But then it feels like a show like succession. Like, yeah, everyone's watching it on Sunday night, you know, or the White Lotus. Everyone's watching it on Sunday but I think that when it actually comes to the numbers, that's not unifying us to the way that it feels like it's unifying a specific type of elder millennial like us. Oh, God, no.

I mean, it's like, when you, like to put it into perspective, like some of those shows like succession, um, they have like roughly the same, um,

viewership. It's like last podcast on the left has listeners. Right. And most people don't know what last podcast on the left is. Like, it's not like, we get recognized and we're, you know, and we're one of the biggest, like, podcasts around. Different than succession, no.

But it's not, yeah, but that's the thing. There's no award ceremonies. It's not something that everybody talks about. It's not like a cultural thing. So, like these numbers are like, like the things that people consume and the things that get big in this world, there's so many of them. There's so many of these little islands that we used to have basically one island that we all lived on. Exactly. And now there are thousands.

Thousands of them, thousands upon thousands of islands that we all, you know, that we all live on, like, separately. And we might have, like, a little crossover here and there. Like, I can, when I, we went and did a show in Dallas a couple weeks ago, I'm now able to talk to my brother and my sister-in-law about Gray's Anatomy. That's nice. Love that. That's great. We've got that thing. We got to talk about my boy George.

Yes. You know, we got to talk about a lot of fun stuff. I'm about four or five seasons into Grey's Anatomy. Hell yeah. But those sorts of things aren't universally anymore. There's not like, there's not like a, there's not a, you know, there's not an ER. ER was a massive thing. Everybody was watching it.

We were kids and we watched it. Children watched it. But these days, yeah, that monoculture doesn't exist anymore. You have like, you know, YouTube channels that are absolutely massive that YouTube channels, YouTube videos that got, you know, more streams and have been watched by more kids than, you know, back in the day. Like, you know, a Seinfeld episode would have been watched by like the entirety of America. Right. and everybody's talking about it. And so you have to watch all of it to make sure that you're keeping up with the Joneses.

But now there's so many Joneses to keep up with, especially in the world of reality television. And this is something that we were kind of talking about before we were recording today, was talking about how, you know, we wanted Marcus to come on today to talk about, like, you know, are you still watching 90-day fiancé? What are you, like, doing in the world of reality? But you had let us know that, like, the world of reality has changed a lot since we used to talk about reality together. It really has.

Like, I used to love 90-day fiancé. I absolutely, I adored that show. But these shows, like, once they get to a certain point, like, there's kind of a tipping point for these shows where I think they become too popular and they become too known. Like, there's got it, like, the people that are on these shows have to be surprised that the show exists. Yes. Like, they have to not know that the show exists.

Right. They have to be like, like they have to see an ad on Craigslist. Like Milk Manor, yeah. They just show up and they're like, oh, this is going to be fine, right? You're not just going to be making us all bang each other's sons, right? We're going to be banging people our age, right? But they didn't know that they were going to be banging each other's sons. But they still said yes.

Love is a great example of this too because at least, I mean, March 2020, yes, it was a perfect time for Love is Blind to come out. We were all in our own pods of despair and it was a very relatable show. And we couldn't believe that it was happening. That was, remember, that was only five years ago that we couldn't believe that Love is Blind. It was like, of course Love isn't blind. What are you fucking talking about?

And then we all watched every single episode. But now it's just like, you just know that the people who signed up for Love is Black. I mean, there have been multiple lawsuits about the workplace conditions of that show and people are still signing up for it. We're still signing up for it. We're all still watching it.

We're getting two seasons a year. year now. And now this is the problem is that MJ and I, we're still watching it. The internet is literally calling this season Love is bland. Very offensive. It is so... Very offensive to the state of Minnesota. It's not nice. It is because

they all look like, and I'm sorry, it took me how many episodes because I couldn't even remember which one was which. They all looked exactly the same. They sounded exactly the same. I was like, I remember one had a nose ring and like, oh, one did this weird, annoying

thing so I kind of could remember them. But you're so right, Mark, is that like reality is so much different now than what they used to, because they're churning out so much of it that they don't care or they like that they're hiring

criminals. Yeah. That they're hiring people that are just like, oh, that's good. I'm glad they're a grabbist. Then maybe you'll write an article about it. You know what I think it is? You ever heard that Mark Twain quote, I would have written a shorter letter if I have more time?

Yes. Yeah. It's basically, it's like editing takes time. Right. And, you know, it takes time. Like, if you, like, I can sit and write a script and, you know, and it take, you know, and it can be 22 pages long, but it takes a lot of time to condense that idea down into, like, 15 pages where it's, it's succinct, it's good, it's fun, you know, it sings.

With these shows now, like you're saying, they're putting out two, three seasons a year. And, like, 90 Day Fianza used to be, like, four. 45 minutes long. It's now... Hour and a half. It's an hour and a half. And I just forward through like swathes of it

just because nothing's happening. Because they're not taking the time to edit. They're not taking the time to say like, let's make a good show. Let's edit this thing down to something that's manageable, something that's fun, you know, where we can actually like make characters and it's not just some,

two people staring at each other in front of a fucking gas station and getting into a fight that you don't care about. You know, it's like, and so we can, we can make. we can maybe make a whole fucking storyline where it's not just another white woman who's like super surprised that her Muslim husband

wants her to live a Muslim fucking lifestyle Oh my God, it is that when I moved to Jordan That this mother man is gonna Florida Brittany Let me be a Muslim I just don't understand It only worked out once with Avery

I don't know if you remember Avery Oh I still follow her on Instagram Oshala Ashala Yes, yes. And it really worked out well. Another girl from Florida that I was like, you're from Orlando. You're like 17 years old. Do you think this is a great idea? But they're still married and they got kids. So you know what? Good for them. There's still a male. Yeah, Avery was a girl from Florida that decided to convert to Islam. Met a guy from, I think, maybe it was Jordan. It's a lot of Jordan. Yes. And then he, you know, moved, you know, moved, like, did the headscarf and everything.

He moved to America, became like a dentist, like a dental hygienist or something. And now they got, like, three kids. See, these are the stories that I love. Yeah. This is what I want to follow. I like the success. In fact, I mean, we will talk about this on Second Helpings. I may have cried through the last episode of Love is Blind. I know that it's bland, but I still get attached sometimes, right? And I still, even though you're like, I hate all these people,

why am I still crying at the end of love is blind? Because I'm an empath. I understand. That's why, Marcus, that's why MJ, I'm an empath. Now, Jackie, I know that this is the time in the show and we would shift to a segment, our new segment, which we're calling Slipin and Slidding, but I also know that there was a story that you really wanted to ask Marcus about.

And it involves a large rodent. Yes, it certainly does. But I also did. My ears are hurting. I like possums. Yes. I was so intrigued by this story and I said, I needed to know Marcus's take. Officials are urging Californians to eat this rodent species that, quote, tastes like rabbit.

Marcus, the neutria are invasive species that are taking over California. And we have to get rid of the neutria. They're asking us to start eating the nutria. According to this article, apparently they taste like a mixture between a rabbit and a turkey, which are two very different tastes in animals. Now, Marcus, the slogan for this is, say they swamp saute a nutria. How do you feel about this? I don't like people telling me what kind of meat I eat.

I don't tell me what kind of meat I eat. I eat what kind of meat I like. Don't tell me to eat a nutriya. I mean, don't get me wrong. I'm not going to say that, like, I'm above eating neutria. Right? I'm not above eating nothing. No, me neither.

But stop pushing me to eat a nutria. I just feel like this is such a thirsty, like People magazine is so thirsty for us to get out there and start getting these neutria. And which officials? That's the question. Whenever they say officials. Yeah, no, this is part of our ongoing media literacy education program at page 7 where we have to figure out who's claiming to know things, but I do like the other slogan they're putting forward, which is

eat the invaders. I think that's the slogan for 2025 we can I'm not trying to eat our fascist overlords, but it's something to consider, you know, eat the invaders. This is coming in from the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service. Now, here's the thing, though. We know what's happening to a lot of the federal government

right now, and part of me is like, is this some kind of joke that they think they're like, oh, they put it a bunch of clowns to run. Or it's just like something that hates a Nutria that is now running like the U.S. Fish and Wild Life. I just imagine like just like a moose is sitting and is like,

we've got to eat all of the neutra. We've never eat a moose. You imagine it's like the Chick-fil-A commercial. Exactly. Exactly. Save a life, eat a chicken. It was right. Save a cow, eat a chicken. Yeah, yeah, save a life.

But you're saying save a moose, eat a nutriot. Eat a nutrient. Or if anything, maybe a rabbit wrote it, because the rabbit, it tastes like rabbit. It doesn't have to eat meat anymore. You can eat this giant rat. So what's the nutrient eaten that we have to eat it? I don't know.

It just says it's an invasive species and that we must get rid of them. It's taking over the swamps. Wow, they also put out one of their campaigns says, Eat Me, please, I'm invasive and delicious, which I like that. Man, another things we need to start eating, northern snakeheads, green iguanas, invasive carp and feral hogs. How do you like suss out? Ooh, I'll bet the hogs are good.

No, feral hogs. Okay, no, I did grow up eating feral hogs. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, wild hogs is what we'd call them. That sounds great. Extremely invasive species. Well, they root up, right?

Then they rip everything up. Yeah, well, because I grew up in a peanut community. Ah. So wild hogs love roots. And so they'd root up and peanuts are a root crop. So farmers... Wait a second. Peanuts are in the roots?

Yeah, peanuts are underground. Wow. I didn't know. Also, I didn't know you grew up in a peanut community. Wait a second. We've talked about Lubbock, Texas. I didn't know it was peanut town. I didn't, but that's the thing.

I didn't grow up in Lubbock. I grew up three hours east of Lubbock in a town called Rochester. Every bean is attached to a plant? This is nuts. What are you talking about? One plant for every bean? Yeah, peanuts were, yeah, peanuts community, cotton community, and cattle. Oh my God, Marcus.

Yeah, but those hogs like the farmers used to pay 10. teenagers to go out at night and kill the wild hogs because wild hogs are of course they're nocturnal animals. So you get a bunch of like drunk 16 year olds with these massive guns and spotlights driving around backroads searching for wild hogs. And then once you kill one, you take it to somebody who knows how to do like an underground cook on it, who knows how to like wrote, you know, who really knows how to get that. Wait, so you bury them? Yeah, you bury them. And then you have a party where there's just this massive pile of hog meat. that you just grab with your bare hands and eat.

When can we start doing this? Can we start doing this in Los Angeles? You're going to do it with a new tria. You've got to have a nutria roast, like a crab boil, but with a bunch of giant rats. Yeah, actually, we could. We could. If you want to go out and we, that would be me and Jeff.

Yeah, it would be you guys out there. You're going to have to go, I don't know, I guess dig or set it up the dirt for us. I'm like an outdoorsman. And here's one thing. I mean, we have to go shoot them. We have to go kill them. Oh, you got to go get them. first.

Yeah, we got to get them. What you go get them? Let's go get them. All right, me and Jim, we'll go get them. You got to go get them, Marcus. We'll get them. I'll get them, man. We'll get them.

I've been watching my problems. I've been having a lot of brain problems recently. So the way to go about that, and I've really found my niche on TikTok, which is piggy videos. I've been watching a lot of, oh my God, with their little snouts. I've been watching a lot of, like, from little baby pigs to big pigs and, like, lots. of pigs that have like dog friends and things like that. This has been my, this has been a, I haven't had a lot of pork in my life.

And I think it's because of the baby videos. I don't think you're ready to eat the feral hogs, Jackie. I'm sorry to tell you this. But I think that if your husband and Marcus go hunt and kill some feral hogs, I think you might feel sad about it. But the thing is, they're real hard to kill them. Feral hogs are big and scary and could hurt me. I'm talking about baby pigs.

Oh, no, they would, that was part of the reason why we would also like try to take them downs because feral hogs do attack people. Yeah, they're bad. Oh, yeah, they're terrible. Oh, yeah, a friend of mine got chased up by, got chased up a tree. Whoa. By a whole pack of them had to stay up there for hours until they lost interest. Whoa, man, that makes sense of maybe that's what those are for.

Sorry, Amazon keeps, like, pushing me for some reason to get this, like, like, crate-esque thing that is attached to a rope that you put a dog inside of and then you hoist the dog. up into, I guess, a tree, I guess away from danger? For bears. But also, but Marcus, I don't have a dog. No. I don't, I'm never outdoors. Like, I even take a vitamin D supplement because I never see the sun. So, like, why is it being marketed to me?

Is this, you're telling me that this product is for if you're camping with your dog and you don't want the dog to be eaten by a bear, so you put the dog in a little hammock overnight? I guess you hoist them into a tree. Is that what you do when you take your dogs camping? I don't have dogs and I don't go camping, so I don't know. No, I wouldn't. You have dogs, Marcus, would you do this if you went camping with the dogs?

Keep them in the tent. You put him in the tent, right? You would put them up into a tree. No, you wouldn't house. Sounds like bait. That's right. That's why I feel like it's like, is that, yeah, that's where you put the food overnight, right? And like you keep it away from bears.

Yeah, but the dog's not food. Dog goes in the tent. Yeah, dog goes in the tent. So I don't understand. You snuggle with a dog. You snuggle with us and then we go on fun hikes during the day. Anyway, sorry. Everyone mean to go down that road, but I guess it is time.

You know, just a little bit of a list, a little bit of a list. Oh, who's on the list? Got to have that list. Yeah. It's not a celebrity list. Can I just say it one time, though? Yeah. All right, it's time for the list.

Who's on the list? Marcus, let's list. You always did it. So you don't know the other part. Mark is. No, while you all were singing, that's when I was like looking for the tab that, you know, I had lost. To make sure that you pull it up and Lord knows what we were going to be talking about.

Now, I will say last week I did introduce, oh no, it's Jackie Snacky. What snacks are she going to eat today because I am trying to become a snack fluencer. But then we heard back from a bunch of people who have something that we like to call misophonia. Misophonia. Which is what it's very, it's not good. Fear of mouth. Like the hearing the mouth sounds. And I don't want to do that to people.

So I decided to use a list about snacks. But at the very end, we are going to try some of these snacks because I did pick out a few snacks that were specifically for Marcus. Because again, I'm trying to become a snack fluencer. I see one that I know is just for me and it looks incredible. You know it's just for you. And we're going to get there in the end. Now, this is canceled and discontinued foods from the 90s and 2000s that literally every single person on Earth wants back. Marcus, how we feel in about a chaco taco taco?

Never had a chaco taco. Wow. I always looked at the chaco taco taco and I thought I don't deserve that. Why? It was more expensive than the other things at the ice cream truck. That is true. It felt like too much. It felt like that's too much for me.

I totally understand. I also like to punish myself and I really only splurged for a chaco taco maybe two to three times in my life, and unfortunately they are delicious. God, they're just so good. Especially, it's like, it's the fold when you bite them because the ice cream kind of folds into it. So it's like almost every single part of it is the last bite of a, like, a chocolate-filled tip little bar, but you still have the ice cream bit at the very end.

You know what I mean? Sounds delicious. Someday you'll get them. But what about altoid sours? Did you ever live the life of the altoid sours? Yeah, I did love the altoyed showers. They were really fun. But I did out.

I also had like an altos like because altoyds like for they made a really big push. They did in the mid in the mid 90s. Oh they did. Oh they did. I fell into the altoid hole and just like I just pop those things like all day long. And then I found cigarettes and I did that instead. I did that instead. I think the altoid, the like high schooler who was obsessed with altoids to cigarette smoker pipeline.

Very real at that time. Look at Marcus. Oral fixation. That I also used to chew through. I was the kind of person that everyone. in a while would have like the pen all over her face because I would be chewing

on my pens and then the pen would break and then I'd get ink all over my face and you couldn't get it off and I was that fucking guy and I'm fine with it. Yeah, that happened to me once. And then in high school you'd say oh I have an oral fixation

and people'd be like, oh yeah, and I'm like, you're right, I also suck dick. You are correct. Very, very good good assumption on you. I don't know why Spearmint Tick Tacks is on this list because I feel like

spirament Ticktacks are not that difficult to find. They've been gone. They've been gone for a few years, according to BuzzFeed. According to this. But I will say recently, in the world of the snacks sphere, and I don't know if this is just because of Valentine's Day and this is what they were all pushing. What I'm really finding in the world of snacks is that for every holiday, they, like, somebody

in, like the kings and queens of snacks decide what that holiday is going to be. So for this year, Valentine's Day, everything was strawberries and cream, everything. but they started putting out strawberries and cream tic tacks and I feel like that goes against the purpose of the tic-tac, right? A tic-tac's got to be tart, like orangey. And fresh and fresh. Yeah, you don't want dairy in your breathman. No, no cream.

Exactly. It's not the strawberry. That's the problem. It's the cream. Thank you both for understanding. What about Oreo cakesters? They're like Oreos, but they're cakes. I bought these for my child last week.

Whoa, fake news. This is the real fake news. This is where you come to find out what's fake news. Right here, you can still get Oreo cakesters. Yeah, Oreo cakesters are those things that they're always on sale at the supermarket for some reason. And I took a chance on Oreo cakessters not too long ago. And they are less than fine. Yeah.

Really? I would say like a little bit below fine. Just get a zinger. Yeah. Oh, yes. It's for the nostalgic. It's for the nostalgia. a whoopee pie. It's like a whoopee pie

Oreo situation, but it's, when it comes to an Oreo, I think you really just want if it's not broke, you don't want to change it, you know what I mean. Yeah. I mean, you know I love the flavors though, because we did try the post-malone Oreos and the... Marcus made a very upset face.

But it was really, it was an salted caramel shortbread Oreo and it actually was pretty good. That sounds all right. Now, this, I remember these were too much ice breakers, liquid remember those little balls and you would put them in your mouth

and the problem is I remember I used to because I just was oh, desperate to feel. I would put like 10 of them in my mouth and just feel to burn, feel to burn. I also was the kind of person that was snort and pixie sticks because I thought it made me look cool. Sure.

Yeah, this was a... Can't say I ever pop these in my mouth. No, never did these. It was like ruin your tongue for the rest of the day situation and a lot of the stories Jackie tells about her relationship with candy. It really, they're kind of foreshadow

her coming speed addiction, you know. I think that's what's going on. Very interesting. Maybe all the drugs that I used to do. But you know, the key word is used to. Yes. And I never tried out the Skittles bubble gum, but I bet it was great even though a word on the street is

Skittles are not individually flavored only their scent is different. That is the word on the street. Yeah, I always thought that Skiddle, I never could tell the difference between a taste and a skittal. You just pop them all in your mouth and it's just one big gummy thing. But that's how we eat them. Yes, I will take, yeah, I shovel. No, you isolate by flavor.

Does no one else? No. Of course they taste different. No, you just shovel them all in your mouth and you just make one big, because that's what Skittles are. Skittles is temporary gum you can swallow. You're right. You're damn right.

But you got to get a big handful of them in order to make that happen. Make it cut up all of your gums. Make you wish you were never bored. Like praying. I'll never eat the Skittles again. It's unbelievable. It's unbelievable. No, you sort them by color and then you eat them in order of least favorite color to best color.

That's how you do Starburst, but Skittles. True. That's all the same. Yeah, I'm sorry, MJ. I'm going to have to leave you out in the cold on this one. I apologize. This is why you left, Marcus. This is why you left.

Fundamental differences that cannot be reconciled. But also, are either one of you guys jelly beans? people. No. No. Not whatsoever. No. So, see, look, we've recovered.

We've recovered. We agree on that. We found common ground. Yeah. But have you feel both about nerd clusters? Have you gotten into the realm of nerd clusters yet? Absolutely. Absolutely, yes.

Unfortunately, since nerd, nerd clusters are, they're fairly new. I had to give up hard candy many years ago because I had a really serious pez addiction, remember? Oh, I do remember. Oh, yeah. Pesdiction. Remember? I had a really serious

PES addiction going from the time I was in high school all the way up until my early 30s. And that combined with the way that I grind my teeth due to the stress. Every night I lost three teeth. I destroyed three teeth. And I've only

recently got two of those teeth replaced. Oh no. I only got them replaced last year. So I have to like hard candy. Like I give myself, I get three three bricks of Pez, like three packages of Pez every Christmas. Wow. Mark, this is the cutest thing I've ever heard.

Yeah, but I have to, but I do have to, I can't do nerds, you know, because they're, like, I can't do that, they're too crunchy. I'm so sorry for your loss. It's okay. Congratulations on your new teeth. That's no small feet. That's like a big deal. Thank you.

Yeah. This is not here? No, no, no. It's not small feet. It's teeth. That's not small feet. You put feet in your mouth. Hey, my meat your mouth.

look little and I don't know how you got them jammed in there. I can't still eat skittles though because they're soft. Ah, okay, soft enough. Now, I, now I'm sad because I don't know why I thought that I was going to really get you with these because I was so excited because for spring Thanksgiving this year, which is what we call Easter here, we, they started doing nerds, chewy jelly beans. And I love, but I only love the starbursts. jelly beans. But they look so good. But they look like

nerd cluster-esque jelly beans. I thought that's good. In my brain, that means there's more of the jelly bean, like the jelly portion of a nerd cluster, which I'm here for. Yeah. I'm holding the bag right now and I can smell them through the bag. You can smell them. Wonderful. Oh, you can smell the sugar. Oh, I can smell it. I did the

worst thing ever to you. It's like early in the day and I'm just giving you all these temptation that you can't have any of it. No, I can. I absolutely can. You have the soft ones. Well, I will say for later when we get into, like in the very end, I'm glad that Marcus did choose. I brought in multiple snacks that are, because of course, spring Thanksgiving, they're putting out a lot of different new edition snacks right now. But one thing that I saw that I was really excited to give to Marcus, that is the Dr. Pepper. Peeps. Dr. Pepper Peeps, everybody.

These look both they look simultaneously appetizing and disgusting. At the same time. And that's what you want with a good snack. You damn right. It's like you want something that you're not sure if you should put this in your mouth,

but God you want to put it in your mouth so bad. Oh, you want to put all of it in your mouth. I've always, I like looking at them and I'm very scared to put them in my mouth. I love Dr. Pepper flavored things. I like I love, I love, so much. I love Dr. Pepper Cake. I love Coca-Cola cake. Yeah. I just love it.

I was so excited. Do I wait? We have to wait till the end. We have to wait to the end because that is actually, I'm done with our list, even though we didn't get to Waffle Crisp, which I still kind of fairly might believe Waffle Crisp is one of the greatest cereals to have ever existed, and I still mourn the death of Waffle Crisp. I'm just happy they brought back Oreo O's finally. Oh, did they did. Oh, hell yes. I consider Oreo O's to be the top tier of unhealthy cereals. Of sugar and cereals.

You've got to have it up there as well. Definitely up there. You have to have two different lists, I feel like. It's like you have to have the sugary cereal lists. And you have to also, it's like, yeah, I usually eat the ones with all the fucking grains and the fiber in it. Yeah. It makes me frown.

And I eat it every day. It makes me frown. Because if there's one thing that my brother has taught me is you got to have that frown bowl every morning if you want to be shitting straight and he is correct. But all, I'm sorry, MJ, it is your time to shine. Well, you know, we didn't discuss this beforehand, Jackie, you know, there's two different

versions of this segment song. There is the Marcus version and there is the Holden version. Which version should we do? I guess we'll do the Marcus version. I don't remember. You'll, it'll, I mean, I think that you'll pick up, pick it up, but we'll see what, we'll see how those... Pick it up, pick it up,

pick it up, thank you. I didn't even bring up the ska song about a pit that I keep thinking of when I watch the pit, it is a real big fish song that goes, when I'm in the pit, I'm gonna punch and kick. When I'm in the pit, don't you know, I'm gonna fuck up shit.

Yeah, wow. That is what's happening to know why we in the pit. Yeah. His shit is getting fucked up. All right. We're gonna see if your little memory folds remember what to do when I say I think I'm going blind.

Items. We can't see them. We can't see them. We didn't all of the same time. I couldn't remember how it went. What Marcus used to say was just I think I'm going blind, right? Oh, I don't remember. Or no, you would say it's time for blind items.

Yeah, it's time for blind items. They say, oh, it's time of blind items. And they say, oh, we can't see them. That's what it used to be. That's what it used to be. It was my memory. You know, hold. He's like an invasive species

Like the Nutria And he has And we should eat him Save a Swamp, eat a Holden Yeah Because I was gonna ask Like what it like what's the Holden version Oh big fucking Ead

He's so good idiot Oh god Yeah Get him Marcus Get him Marcus Get him No it was It was Marcus in his dulcet tones

It's time for blind items Yeah It's time for blind items Let's do it We can't see them All right So these are blind items Oscars edition.

Okay, all right. We're catching up. And we're still guessing, right? Oh, yes. You get to guess. All right. I've never gotten to guess before. This is fun.

It's a lot harder than you think. It is actually shocking after the fight they had while getting ready that this four and born A minus list actress who performed and her significant other still attended together. Okay, foreign born A minus. So I'm thinking possibly the bond. No, were there A-minus people involved in the bond thing? Form-in-born?

Somebody who performed. And they came together. Give us some more, MJ. Give us some more. So this is a person, Jackie, that we do talk a lot about on this show. More we talk about her, the person she shares the screen with. But this is a person who she performed at the Oscars. She is kind of famously in a rocky relationship.

and it sounds like she had a fight with that significant other in that relationship. But she's a singer. And the other person is an actor? Not a singer, but she's a famous person that we know. What nationality? Oh, you're going four and born, but if you tell us four, it's not Canada. It's not Canada.

It's not Canada. This is really hard to not give away with hints. But let's, our. All right, so she performs and man, does she do a great job? And we love her. Very busy. Well, I'm not saying we love her. Oh, we're not saying we love to talk about her.

Okay, we just love to talk about her. She had a very busy press tour year. Ariana? Close. Yeah, I was supposed to say, where was she born? I thought she was born in Florida. Cynthia Arrivo? Correct.

Cynthia Arribo and her partner, Lena Waite. Oh, yes. Oh, gotcha, gotcha. I will say this. They did not smile that entire ceremony. No, no, no, no. They did not crack a single grin. No, no, no.

They look. I actually did comment to Carolina when we were watching. I was like, those, they looked miserable. Yes. I'm in a, I kind of forgot she was a foreign born actress. That's what I wasn't even that. She's British, isn't she? That she's British.

Like, extremely British. She's very British and I forgot because I feel like I've only, like cedar and things. So I just, I don't know. It's my fault. I should have said holding space. I totally forgot to who's British as well. I should have said holding space.

I was going to say holding a finger, but that would have given it away. No, you were doing great, MJ. This is on us. They were fighting. This is you, you set it up for us. Yeah.

They were fighting. You were right, Marcus. All right. Number two. Now that this actor has no more need for publicity, will the reality star be tossed to the curb like he told friends a few months ago. Whoa. Oh.

Machine Gunn Kelly? Nope. No, that's the other one. Damn it. Okay. He's a reality store? He is not. His partner is.

His partner is. And he needed publicity and now he no longer does. Oh, so now he's kicking her to the curb. Not SpongeBob. No. Because she's not a reality star. No, he is. My God, have you gotten into the world of Ariana and SpongeBob guy?

I have opinions about Wicked that I'm not sure. I don't think are going to make me very popular. No, I know you hated Wicked. Okay. All right. Okay. My thing about Wicked, I know it's not for. It's not for you.

I know that. And I gave it a shot because it's like I'm proud of you that you gave it a shot. Of course. I love giving things a shot. I love getting outside of my comfort zone because I like to take, you know, influences from a ton of different places. You never know where inspiration is going to come from. Yeah.

But I watched it and I know it's not for me, but it's also objectively not a good movie. Shots fired. It's not like objectively like it's because I saw the because when speaking of the performance, I watched that performance, you know, when she came out and she like sang the song and I was like, oh, I fucking I get it now. Like it's I get the songs when they're sung live because it's like it's this 3D thing. Right.

Yeah. You see and it like unfolds and you feel the emotion. That movie to me is so flat. It's so flat, it's so two-dimensional. Like the characters are whatever, the jokes are bad. The set, like, I couldn't believe it got best set design. I thought it looked like shit. Whoa.

I thought it just looked so boring. Like, the whole, it was just so boring. I hear except all opinions. Singing is a delight, like singing at award shows specifically, or whatever she sings it live, is, like, such a delight. Like, that's when it really comes to life for me. So I understand that. And I'm not a musical hater. Really, like, you know, I'm a massive little shop of horrors fan.

Huge. Love musicals. I mean, we were going to play the Jinks Monsoon singing one day more the end of Les Mizz for you, but just because it was the crossing over of our lay miss world in your drag race world. Yeah, I mean, I did. I went and saw Jinks Monson and Ben Delacrem do a musical in New York City. Oh, that must have been amazing. You went to that show?

Yeah, I didn't know. The what the vaudeville one where they were frozen in ice or was it the one after? It was the one after that. I saw the one last year when we did our show. Like I went, yeah, it was, they did the nutcracker. Oh, yes. Yes. I saw their, her, her, one of her first shows in New York City was like back in like 2013 or 2014 and they played, uh, she played a vaudeville star who had crashed their play and been frozen and ice and then came back to life and did all of these old vaudeville songs in the style of pop music. And it was one of the best shows I've ever seen in my life. That sounds incredible. This is their holiday special.

That's awesome. Yeah, Jenks and Ben Dillacrim do a holiday special over here. So I'm not a musical hater. No, no, I understand. It's just that this one in particular, I understand that it wasn't for me, and I understand why people love it. But I didn't understand the, like, award show hype. Like, I didn't understand why people were like, this is a good movie. It's like, no, it's not.

It's kind of like Barbie. We're like, Barbie's a good, like, it's fun. It's great. Like, it's a really fun movie. It was really well made. I liked it. But it's like, it's like, it's not. an award show movie,

yeah, yeah, it an award, like, I get that. I get it. Yeah, neither is like, but on the other end,

neither is like Dune. Like, Dune's not, like, Dune's a fun action movie. Right. Like, maybe I'm like a more of a purist. And I know they did the thing

where they expanded it by like 10, you know, to 10 movies so they could, you know, get more, like the bigger Blockbusters in it to bring in like more viewers and all that. But there's just something about,

like, I don't think, Dune also wasn't like best picture. Speaking of Dune, although I love Dune, although I love Dune. I loved it, but it was the best picture. Okay, wait. So is it the Jenner?

Is it Jenner and Timmy Shamanem and Ding Dong? There you go. There you go. That's not fair because Timitay has been big for a minute. Yeah. And I feel like that's not a fair blind. I know. He's been having a very good year since, what, 2021 and at least.

At least. Like he was like nominated for, called by your name. Like what do you, I feel, I take umbrage with the blind writing of that one. The blind writers say that maybe now that he's Oscar. Oscar, I mean, yes, he's been having a good year since for many years now, but this is, this year did put him into another level, right? Sure. In terms of Oscar nominations and whatnot.

But anyway. He wanted a complete unknown. I guess that's what they're saying, is that he wanted to get the publicity to get a complete unknown. And then now that he didn't get it, he got kicked to the curb. Whoa. Now he don't need no Jenner. Don't need her. And that's fine.

Don't need her. Although, I mean, I don't understand that relationship. What do they talk about? I really don't understand that relationship. And I don't want to be a needless hater, but I don't think that she has much to say. Yeah, maybe not. That's based on a lot of hours of tape.

I mean, not that I watch the Kardashians, but there's evidence, there's reason to believe she doesn't have much to say. It's because she's never said much. I would imagine, yeah, his research and he's like, yeah, I learned this fun new thing about Bob Dylan at the Newport Folk Festival. I don't think she's going to have...

I don't think. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, she's talking to be like, I prefer Dave Van Runk and Bill Ocks. Maybe she is, Marcus. Maybe. Maybe she is like, kiss me, I'm a liberal, such an un misunderstandsets. I don't know if she has the deep knowledge of the folk world.

Having like really deep conversations about it. Let's talk more about Pete Seeger. All right, well, this is our last one. And this one does go out to dear host Holden McNeely. but I think that this will be fun for both of you as well. Apparently, if you get a few drinks into this A-list, illiterate, illiterate actress, she will let you decide for yourself

whether her breasts are real or fake. Wow. Did you say alliterative or illiterate? They always say in the blinds, illiterate, but they mean all right. Same first and less, yeah. It's not otherwise you believe that everyone in Hollywood can't read,

which also might be true. Yeah. But we're talking big honkers and we're talking Holden-McNeely honkers. Big honkers. And ones that Holden likes? Because I feel like he doesn't talk about honkers very often. Jackie, the listeners are screaming in their cars right now.

They are screaming. About who's honkers does he talk about all the time? Oh my God. I don't listen to him, MJ. When he's screaming about honkers, that's the time when I shut off the most. All right, let's see if we can bring Marcus into this. A young, young, very hot actress who is indeed famous for her honkers. Sidney Sweeney?

Yes. Ah, those honkers. Could you pull up Cindy Sweeney for me just so I think of an older? Just so I know exactly. Research purposes. Research purposes. Let me, uh. Yeah.

White Lotus. This young star. She's all over the place right now. She's in Euphoria. She's in White Lotus. I haven't seen White Lotus. So I'm not familiar. I was thinking of someone entirely different.

You know, you should check out. Immaculate. Immaculate is not a very good movie up until, because she plays like the lead in it. She's a very sexy. none in it. It is not a very good movie until the last like 10 minutes and then it became a movie that I saw again. All right. All right. She was also at a handma, the handmaid's tale, which I didn't know. Oh, really? Everyone was screaming last year because she was in this movie called Anyone But You with Glenn Powell. They had this like very steamy romance movie to the point that everybody thought that they were in real

life also banging, but obviously it was just a whole PR machine thing, just trying to get everybody to talk about this movie that nobody really cared about. But everybody ended up really enjoying it a lot more than just a regular rom-com. So she's kind of been hot everywhere. Go home and research her, Marcus. She is very hot. And there's some research done. Okay, yeah, I'll do some research.

I'll go, I'll watch White Lotus. I've been here and watch White Lotus for a long time now. Yeah. You'll like it. Yes, yeah. I would like it. You'll like it. Very much so.

Yeah. Yes. Absolutely. All right. That's fine. But, well, I got that at the very least. You will get to. I got that to look forward to.

You'll get to squeeze her breasts and find out if they're real or fake. And that's the blinds I can see again. You can see again. Welcome back. And I guess you won't be able to really truly enjoy the nerds jelly beans. But Marcus, I will enjoy them in your stead. Thank you. You can watch me.

If you have misophonia, goodbye. We love you. Thank you for listening. We love you. It's just the end of it. This is just the last of the show. If you want to hear Marcus. The very end of it.

Yes, I just need sticker. I was so excited when I saw these Dr. Pepper peeps because I had no idea that they made soda-flavored peeps and I had never seen anything because I was looking for something specifically that I was like Marcus would like. I was like, well, done. It smells like Dr. Pepper. It smells like Dr. Pepper that's been like left out for a long time. Like Marcus is wafting like a wine. He's about to taste a fine wine.

He's wafting it. Yeah. You think it's going to taste like a pop rock. does it taste like Dr. Pepper? It's got the smell, but does it have the taste? I could just be drinking

a Dr. Pepper right now. Wow. In a full of marshmallow? Is that an endorsement or a... No, I mean, what it does is that, like... May I have one? No, of course, no, please, please. I don't think I like peeps,

but this is part of being a snack fluencer. Sometimes you've got to do the dirty work. What I mean is that, like... Oh, the aftertaste is bad. The after taste is real bad. Wouldn't you swallow it? Oh, man. Like, once you swallow it, it's bad.

Oh, man, this hurts. Oh, man, this hurts. My teeth. Yeah. Oh, wow. Does it fizz like a pop rock? Does it feel so day? No.

No. No. It's just got, it's got Dr. Pepper dust on the outside. It's got like a crust of Dr. Pepper, which I find very interesting. It's like you're eating it and you're thinking, it's like, why am I not just drink it to Dr. Pepper right now?

Yeah, because I'm not refreshed at all. I just am still eating this peep. Well, Marcus, you've now got an entire box of those. and I hope you enjoy them. I just, you know, we're here buying these things so you don't have to. If you love Dr. Pepper, if you love Dr. Pepper and you love Peeps, this might be your thing, but I dare say Marcus Parks loves them both and I see the look on his face and he doesn't look happy. There's a texture to it.

You know, I will try a nerd candy jelly bean. Okay. I can have some. I know. But I just can't like, you know, have a little. a whole, I can't just make this my life anymore. I just need to know if these jelly beans are any good. And I have to keep bringing in snacks.

Russell it. I have to keep bringing in snacks. Oh my God, they just smell so good. Or else I'm going to be eating the snacks by myself. He's got to cleanse the palate from the Dr. Pepper Peep, you know. Wow, they sound crunchier than I expected. Are they not jelly beans at all? Mm-hmm.

Oh, that's good. Oh, no. That's really good. That's really good. Yeah. That's, uh, nerd candy jelly beans, huh? that there's Wow!

Wow! It starts It starts from Oh wow! Oh wow! The finish could leave something to be desired. But it's got great crunch. It's got a really good crunch up top. And I love a combination of like a crunchy and a chewy.

But it's got bazing of a flavor though. It's got great flavor in there. It's got a lot up top. Wow. But the finish could be better. The finish definitely could be better. And I'm finding it interesting. I like the shi.

of it, though. I like the shape of it better because it's the ball and not in the shape of a bean. Yeah. I like that better. I think it reminds me more of like a nerd cluster. I love the crackle on the outside of that. The crackle's fan. If you love a jelly bean, give the big, chewy nerds jelly beans a try. Thank you, Marcus. I'm so sorry, MJ, that you don't get to try any of the snacks anymore. Well, now I know not to get the Dr. Pepper peeps and yes, to get the jelly beans. Now, should I close out with this really sweet listener email that involves a little Marcus? then we'll say goodbye. Yeah, I'd love that.

Please. It involves a little Marcus and a little Holden. So that's nice, a little bridge here. So this is from K. LaHou-Raei, right, huge page seven

girly here. I started listening way back when Marcus was still around. So I've heard every single Marcus and Holden episode. I have always loved

the absurdity he brings. He's genuine and funny. And I don't understand the Holden hate. He's wildly inappropriate but does nothing to mask the empathetic and caring person he is.

We'll miss you on page seven so much. On another note, sleep is something I struggle with. I love sleep but have a very hard time falling asleep. My therapist recommended a book on tape or a sleep-aid podcast before bed. Nope. Instead, I started listening to old Wizard and the Bruiser episodes. Holden and Jake make me feel safe and like I'm hanging out with an older brother,

which frankly is an insane thing to say about men. They've really helped me with some of my most frustrating and loneliest nights. Just thought you should know, Holden, that you're loved. And this is somebody who's been around since the Marcus days. And we, Marcus, have heard from so many people. In people saying goodbye to Holden, he got a lot of love and it was really, really nice. But we heard from so many people who were like, we've been there since the early, early days. We love Marcus.

We've loved the Holden era. And they're excited to see what comes next. And to those of you guys who have reached out and who have been waiting for Marcus to come back. I hope that everyone had a good time with him because we sure did. Yeah, I miss doing this show. This is really fun. Thank you so much. And you know what?

Now that we're starting to rotate our third chair, we will have you back soon. I'll absolutely be back. This was a lot of fun. And I was pretty proud of myself. I was afraid I was going to fall into a 40-year-old man territory. No. But I did not. No, we kept all the bad baby in Alabama Barker stuff.

That's being saved for second helpings. Don't worry. You don't need to worry about any of those things. Perfect. And thanks for not making me talk about sex too much because nobody wants to hear a 42-year-old man talk about sex. You know, hey, well, you know, maybe some people out there are curious about it, But we're not here. We're more curious about what you're putting in your mouth via snacks.

Thank you so much, Marcus Parks. And obviously, you can check out Marcus Parks over on the last podcast on the left. Check out no dogs in space. And when do those episodes drop, hit us with? Last podcast on the left, of course, is every Friday, I believe is when those are released. I'm sorry, I shouldn't even put you on the spot. When people ask me, I'm like, okay, when does anything come out? I know.

I'm talking into a microphone. And we're working on a new No Dogs in Space series right now. Hell yeah. We are also, we have our stream every other Monday at 6 p.m. We've been, like, we totally, like, redid our stream, and we're having a fucking great time with it now. We're having so much fun. So if you like this sort of, like, vibe. Yeah.

Come on ever, No Dogs in Space over at Twitch.com. Slash. LPN TV every other Monday, 6 p.m. PSD. Just check out the schedule. And it's also available. on YouTube on the last podcast on the left, YouTube page. You can go and check out this last episode.

We're really proud of the last one. Last one was a lot of fun. Hell yeah, I can't wait to check it out. And in fact, you know what? You should just spend every Monday at 6pm over with us at Twitch.com. Because every alternating one is Who's the Bitch? Yeah.

So spend your Mondays with us. It's just a better way to start your week, everybody. I hope you are having a wonderful day out there. Thank you so much for joining us on this week's episode of Page 7. Thank you so much, MJ. And again, thank you so much. Parks, we can't wait to have you back soon, and we really appreciate you coming by. I'll be back. We love you, Marcus. Thank you. We love you, Marcus. Thank you. We love you, Marcus.

Bye, everybody. This show is made possible by listeners like you. Thanks to our ad sponsors. You can support our shows by supporting them. For more shows like the one you just listened to, go to lastpodcastnetwork.com.