Painkiller Already - Drift0rs Roomate Watched Him Do What? PKA 714 W/ Drift0r

Episode Date: August 24, 2024

Drifter will be in when he does arrive. That's a fun. Okay, the good corning side. PKA 714. Taylor? This episode of PKA is brought to you by Bluechew, Lock and Load, and the merch. Check all of it out below.

We will get Drifter with us momentarily. Wow. There we are. Hold up, sorry. Having some camera problems here. And we're back. We were just saying that it was a deep. Hey, whoa, you're upright your your upgrade your ambulatory look at

that no you look like like in the like those old guys we had a whole like reveal a little bit you guys are too much production value man yeah you weren't close enough to it it It's close though. Yeah, you should have it show up with a star wipe. I wanted to kind of lean forward, but I figured that would look weird. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you looked like in those 90s movies where like the character's supposed to be sleeping in like a dream and they start floating off the bed. Oh, yes. Yeah. Exactly that, yeah.

It kind of looked like, I think it was like every Disney Plus production. If you look close enough, you can just kind of see the keying. Yeah, I'm so glad that I'm not a Star Wars fan because like it must be such a big deal how much people dislike this new Star Wars show because there's no way like I scroll past Star Wars news quickly on Twitter and it's still feeding it to me of people saying the Acolyte is like the worst show in history and everybody's pissed. It was like the most expensive show per minute in the whole Star Wars universe.

Baffling, everyone hated it. Even more so than the movies? Yeah, yeah. So this is a little different. I haven't watched it but I watch so much like content that covers it. Basically, they messed with the canon a little bit. After they went into the Jedi temple and slaughtered all the younglings, there was this like, what was it when the Jews were spread out? The diaspora? Something like that, isn't that the word? There's like a diaspora of the Jedi. It was like scattered like anything. You're like, ah, maybe there's three left. Maybe only two. There's like Luke and Ahsoka and like maybe one more maybe.

And then Yoda's out there, but then he dies. But now they're just like, yeah, and then there was another one. Yeah. And then, oh, and also there was this group of other Force sensitive people. They don't call themselves Jedi. They're this whole separate group of black lesbian witches and they literally black lesbian. Wait, is that real? I did not watch the show. It was not even remotely.

I did know they were black lesbian witches. Yeah. Now we talking black as in I wear black clothing and I'm goth and I'm Sith or like that's that's cool. I like that. I like that black. You don't like the other. I like all the blacks. I like them. I prefer them. I hate whites. He loves he wants his wizards to be white. It's a whole lot of the rings. Yes. No blue wizards, no brown wizards.

That's what I'm always saying. Mm hmm. Yeah. Not even Gandalf. You were about your Saruman man. Yeah. Yeah. Radagast, the Jew doesn't even make the cut. But no, yes. It doesn't even make the cut It doesn't I know nothing you've said bugs me so far yet like oh, they're black lesbian witches Well, I'm fucking down with lesbian. Well the other thing anymore I'm not but I'm also done with more Jedi's cuz wait, you're saying you wouldn't watch a show about lesbian witches

I've seen charmed Is that what that's about? Are you a shutter subscriber? That's like half their platform. No, I'm I'm I'm so done with the Star Wars stuff. Like to me, it's just something to pick on now. It's not even a

a storied franchise like Lord of the Rings. I feel like it's a misstep with that TV show. I hear bad things, but Hutch really loved it. So some people clearly did like it. He is in the minority. He is in the minority. Very, very much so.

He loves minorities. Mm-hmm. Yeah, he loved the Lord of the Rings show. And I gotta say, that poisons my perspective on his view of a lot of- Everything, everything. Otherwise, you'd appreciate his opinions, I'm sure. If he would have came to the table,

and if we had like the same Lord of the Rings take go work And then watch he mentioned another movie and was like, oh check out XYZ. I'd be like, okay This guy's got his head on straight about Lord of the Rings. So maybe this thing I didn't like that everything everywhere all at once. That's not right. It's close Yeah, I'm in the minority on that one so many many people love that. And Kyle, did you say it won Best Picture? I think it won Best Picture. It won like 15 Oscars. It was an insanely huge event.

It's like a child wrote it. It was just a bunch of like bullshit. Like, now we're all rocks that don't do anything in this universe. Oh, yeah. Yeah, as the- I have a hard disagree on all that. That was five minutes of a two hour movie.

As the fedora tipping, enlightened centrist of films, I watched it and I kept waiting. I kept waiting for like, where's the part that's gonna blow me away? It was fine. It was the most like, like it kept my attention because there were a lot of colors

and like a movement and time travel. But there was no part that I was like, whoa, this commentary is so poignant. No, I didn't hear about the message. You didn't enjoy the martial arts? Like, they literally- I didn't hear about the message. It was fine. But the message of acceptance of the immigrant family

coming to their own in the United States, that message? No, that's the backdrop on which the message is being painted. That is the message. The backdrop is the multiverse stuff. It's about the daughter, to me, the message is about the daughter and her mother's relationship and them coming to terms with her becoming a woman and

being her own separate thing and all that stuff like that's the message the backdrop except course yeah but I don't have to accept you know immigrants because because it was a good movie or anything that's a different story that's what drift is trying to make me do I could I could smell it coming so I got a totally different perspective on this. Wife's family is not her, but should be first generation Chinese family were immigrants.

A lot of people worked in stores and stuff like that. So for that community, this movie was very, very on point. It was very sort of hit home. Her whole family watched it. They all loved it. They all had takes relevant to their lives. It was sort of a big event for the Asian community. Also, I think the movie was fantastic.

It was an independent film with they literally didn't even have the money to hire effects artists. The directors had to do it themselves in Adobe Premiere. And they invented new martial arts moves just for this movie and had 40 and 50-year-old actors trying to perfect stuff that Jackie Chan would have struggled with in his 20s. I thought it was fantastic. I thought it was hilarious. I thought they did the multiverse right.

Perhaps the only show to do that except for maybe Rick and Morty because it's all just infinite random craziness. And for me, it was thoroughly entertaining from start to finish and had an interesting message. I don't understand why every multiverse they go into the earth is in the exact same position and spinning at the same rate. And it always has oxygen. And there always was an earth in this universe It's like so, you know what I mean? Like like it sliders was a fun multiverse show back in the 90s. Oh my god

I loved it. They looked like they had a remote control. Basically. This one kid was a scientist at Paul Reese Davies They'd go through the big wormhole to go to a new place. And not all of these multiverses were even remotely human safe. That remote control was a piece of shit. Like for such a mission critical device, it was built out of paper mache and tin foil. It broke in every third episode. It couldn't get back. Yeah, it was a problem.

So like a big crux, like the premise is this, he can open an interdimensional portal. He didn't know that's what he was doing the first time, but now they're stuck. They can't get the back to their earth. Sometimes they'll go back to an earth that's so close. And like he'll go home and like mom's there and he'll like open the gate and the gate go, and he's like, yes, that's the gate squeak. That's the gate squeak. But then mom will be like a lizard. He's like no! But immediately go back to a new universe there's a timer on the device he's like six hours till our next jump. Till our next slide or whatever and sometimes it'll be one time they went to an earth that didn't have oxygen and it was like 30

seconds. Oh good. Hold your breath. Do you remember the acid rain episode? Because this was the 90s right and the big pollution concern was acid rain. They had an acid rain episode because this was the 90s right and the big pollution concern was acid rain They had an acid rain episode to where they're like it was like a slightly more future earth But when it would rain it would like melt through the building and everybody was like trying to dodge the water drops and the zero Budget production you scared the crap out of me when I was little yeah Like anything you think of it was it was a fun little idea I like the multiverse, but but it gets tiring the same way time travel gets tiring. It's like so nothing matters, you know I it's a fun little diversion away from normal storytelling

But then I want to get back to a narrative that oh he died Well shit the repercussions will be never-ending, you know, like it matters when so they ever go somewhere where like Like they teleport to a world that's exactly the same but everyone is 35 IQ lower and they just run shit I'm not they went to some like world like kind of dumbed down Medieval East sort of places there was there was a Wild West episode There's episodes where there's time, you know, people are 100 years behind or 100 years ahead. There's one. I think there were aliens. I remember these gray faced monster men with red eyes.

But, you know, I was a kid. So what were the Nazis one? That's I think God you're bringing back memories. Yeah, I think that was a whole show on Amazon, wasn't it? It is the man in the high tower, high tower based on the book. Yeah, I didn't watch that because like I hate the Nazis so much. I genuinely did. Like, like, like, I'm like, I don't want to see where they won.

Like we won. Yeah, I saw the man. I didn't get a show like, like, why do they even get a show? They lost. Like when I saw a map of that show, because like then they were promoting it years ago, it showed like all the continental United States. It gets split up with this side being Nazi run and this side being Japanese one. There was such a huge part that was Japanese. I'm like, even in a fantasy world, I can't imagine Imperial Japan exerting power over an area this large. They couldn't. They did. The Nazis couldn't have done that either.

Exerted power all the way on us? No. The Japanese did though. If you look at like Indonesia and China, like the VAT, they were a little higher up than Indonesia. Well, they like they conquered a huge part of coastal China. Like China lost what, like a third of its territory to Japan? Yeah, China until like 60 years ago, China was just like, oh, if we have enough people, we can kind of win. Like, like they, that's what they didn't really do anything yeah yeah now they're just figuring it out and starting to excel the japanese were in china in like either 31 or 33 so like a decade before world war two was in its full-on swing and all the allies are actually doing something they killed so many people i always said the not the japanese worse the nazis

the nazis just have a not as good of a press agent or something weird. You think they'd be able to get one. So to go back to the Allen would be got a personal story about this to go back to the family thing. My wife's grandmother was a survivor of the rape of Nanking. It was really bad. So I got to hear these are secondhand stories passed down. But it was like when the Japanese would come through, they would like just cover themselves in mud and rolling shit and like rip out their hair and like put, you know, mud in their teeth and stuff like that. So the jokes on you, that's my type. They all look like old Japanese woman. You know, there were sexually assaulting people and they also were sort of subjected to indiscriminate bombing. So when sunset, there was no lights. Nobody would turn on lights.

They would have these very, very, very damp lanterns with a lot of purple and blue, like glass light dampeners that would be like very hidden because they didn't want anything to be visible from above or they would just get flattened. And Japan did terrible stuff. There's unit 731, I think we talked about that before, human experimentation.

We gave all of them a pass. They did worse than the Nazis and we gave them a pass in exchange for the data They went back to Japan and got a hero's welcome parade was an absolute nightmare. We steal any Japanese scientists for the moon or did we just steal data? I know he's always stole the Nazis But what about the data did so it's an interesting moral quandary, right? They do have some pretty good data. Now, often it is the data of how long does it take a malnourished beaten prisoner to freeze to death? It's like, okay, now we know how- Well, how much a breach can I inject?

That wasn't too much. It did look like that. How much poison can you take? How much skin can get burned before you just go into shock and die, how long it takes to bleed. They did this one, I saw they like strap Japanese people up to poles, sort of at a distance from like zero to maybe 50 meters and would detonate various grenades and landmines and stuff. And then a guy would come by and check the Chinese prisoners and kind of like assess the damage and see who got hit the worst. And they were kind of like getting the optimal range for their explosives. How do you do this when you're like right away in the war?

They weren't losing a war. They were dominating. This is in the 30s. So so they were when they got a new troop to the unit in China, they would blood him right away by having him bayonet practice on prisoners. They would tie up. It's like, go ahead and kill that guy. Go and kill him real quick. Yeah, I'll watch. Taylor's like, how do you have time to do this when you're losing war?

And Kyle's like, they're winning. Is winning a war less time consuming? Yes, no, definitely. If you're like dominating on two fronts, you can be like, Oh, yeah, let's have a little games in Berlin. But if you're like, getting pressed from all sides, that wasn't the case. Were they doing the unit seven, whatever stuff towards the end? No, like almost pretty shortly after the invasion. I think maybe like a year, however long it took

them to build a base of operations and they were just rolling that out. With the Chinese though, like they were that that's how war had always gone, right? You'd fight your war, you'd conquer the city and then you would do awful things to the people there and rob them. I mean, the Japanese. Yeah, that's what the Japanese were doing in China. And like it would Nanking and especially like if you if you want some really fun, not fun, like Nightmare Horrible Interesting and and like powerful history. The rape of Nanking is one of the most horrific

and well documented events in history. It's crazy the amount of deaths and the amount of torture and rape and just horror. Yeah, just just horror for the branded it correctly. Yeah. For babies on bayonets. Type scenario, they'd cut the babies out of pregnant women and stuff like that. Just they do a lot of the same stuff in North Korea. That's like a pretty like if you're in one of those prison camps that's sort of like a normal punishment you know it's funny I

was I was right about to be like damn the Japanese got off easy we should have really hit them and then I remember the two nuclear bombs that we used on them all right and then we reworked their society into something that pleased our eye for the next decade. We stayed, we didn't leave. We moved in. We were like, how y'all like, they already like baseball, but we're like, y'all really like it now, trust me. Like the Japanese government made women comfort women.

They just like, they enlisted a lot of women to be whores for the Americans to keep them happy. They did the same to Korea and China as well for their soldiers in that time. Yeah, the Japs know how to apologize. They give you that low bow. We also screwed up their society because they, you know, they were running their way, their thing, and we brought in sort of like Judeo-Christian values. We, I think we restricted work on Sunday. We banned cannabis, which they had been using for various sacraments for a very long time. We banned pornography, which they had had for a long time, which is one of the reasons that Japanese porn is so weird,

is they had to come up with all these, like, sort of bizarre ways to get around the American censorship. And that lessened over time, but I think we maintained ownership of, like full ownership of Okinawa until what, the 90s, early 2000s. They got it back. We get to keep the base, but we had the whole, like that was technically American territory as per the Treaty of Surrender, if I'm not mistaken. If I were in charge of the porn policy, and let's say Kyle's like Miley lieutenant and I'm like no more porn for the Japanese. If Kyle comes to me and he's like, general, you're not going to believe what they're doing.

And then he shows me like tentacle stuff. I'm going to like call the president and be like, it's backfired, sir. You're not going to be so excited. We got to import this right now. We got to shut it down. We got to let them know more pixelated dicks. They're getting strange out now. We got to shut it down. We gotta let them no more pixelated dicks They're getting strange out here. It's going back to that in Texas porn hub is banned. I can't go there Are you gonna get a mode I

Can't anymore unless I go to one of those less reputable websites. God knows what you'll find there. That's where I go I like the less reputable with the technicalutable websites. Yeah, I don't want professionals. I don't want to see professionals having sex. I don't want to see someone who's getting paid or if they are getting paid. Not enough. I like that. The line between professional and amateur used to be more that should be a subreddit. Wasn't worth it. It's porn star sad at the end. Now the line between pro and amateur and porn is blurred. Very blurred. Not for me though. Only fans.

Like only fans ruins all that stuff. So. Ruins how? So now in a universe where only fans exist, if you find a girl who is online like fucking and doing stuff just for the love of the game, that's a gym. That immediately becomes my favorite porn star for a month.

You just want an honest to goodness whore. Yeah, I want somebody who's out there, just like baseball. What are your signs? Because what do you see in the video where they're lying about being amateur and your expert eye goes, that, that, that? Yeah. That was a transition. First, obviously, if there's any logos or anything,

clearly they're just blatantly advertising in OnlyFans. But that aside, which most are, there are very few girls who pretend they're not charging if they're charging, right? If they're posting stuff for free, then it's an advertisement for what's not. That's what those YouTube videos that Woody and I love so much are about. The try on girls who try on lingerie and like show

you their pussy through some pretty good videos. Yeah, they're fucking awesome. I watched them to learn how to clean windows more effectively. Dude, my windows are sparkling in this house. You don't even understand that vinegar. That was the trick. That was the trick. Natasha knows what's up. Get those big pussy lips out of the way.

I'm trying to learn your technique. Tell me more about the fabric. I've been on one last night. It was this very like well-built Asian lady. Like, like, like she's like wearing a really short skirt and she's sort of standing silhouetted and she's shaking her ass and you can see her pussy lips from behind

and her butt plug. I was like, this girl's the best. She's only got three videos Woody, three videos. She's still naive. You like them. Let me get this straight Kyle. You don't like a girl who's a professional. I can't even come up with a good youth innocent porn star, dick taker, whatever you want to call it. Sex worker. Sex worker. You don't like a professional. You don't like a girl who's in it for the money. You don't like a girl who's mastered the techniques. You're looking for a girl who's in it for the money. You don't like a girl who's mastered the techniques. You're looking for a girl who's maybe just starting out,

maybe who's got really bad daddy issues and just has to have that full dong there on camera. Yes. No, not that, no. I want their motivation to be purely either, I want to do this or I'm okay with like, yeah, I want them to want people to see them fucking online and that's the whole reason this video is there that so you

like business yeah I suppose so in pornography specifically and it's not not that I like that shooter is not that I thought that I like that fetish specifically but but that fetish is indicative of a genuine like fuck show which is what I'm looking for I don't want to see someone who's like checking their calendar Okay So we need the double blowjob scene on Tuesday and then honey like like a lot of these girls Here's what Amaranth does it's fucking brilliant a lot of them do it though they don't make these like blowjob videos on only fans, but

It's a big ass to suck a real dick. Like that's another notch, like another level of up the totem pole of like as you sell out, you make more money. Like it's somehow you have to find a man that's willing. It's tough, but no, no, no, no, no, you have to find who's a man who's willing to wear a strap on for you to suck. Cause that's what they do. That's what they all do. Cause it's gotta be big, right? They put a strap on. No, I think what Kyle's saying, once you break that seal that's what they do. That's what they all do. Oh, because it's got to be big, right? They put a strap on one.

No, I think what Kyle's saying, once you break that seal, that seal becomes ordinary. So you don't just go from zero to a hundred in a couple of weeks. You need to stretch this out. First show your boobs, then show your bottom, then maybe suck a dildo and then down the road working on real dicks. Yeah, I see exactly what you're saying. What they've done here is like they're making content of them sucking something and then they're making it seem like they're sucking a dick. It's the most realistic dildo you've ever seen. I'll be like staring at that dick tail really getting in there. I'll be

like, Oh, is that a freckle? Is that a freckle? That looks like a real freckle. And then I'm online going through catalog. And before I know it, I've been playing on this frame for 40 minutes and I realized she's not even in it You said a guy wearing a strap on so she's not sucking like a strap on stuck to a wall a man is wearing a strap on. Yeah let me explain the suggestive nature and what's being done here so you'll have you won't it's not a big wide shot, okay? I don't think a stage play where we see a whole room and all the players, you see like the edge of the man's hip

and his elbow and then like a dick that comes out. You don't see dick root. You'll see like dicks coming out. And sometimes we'll have it in his underwear, have underwear over and like the dick just be stuck through the fly. And then she's on her knees like sucking the dick and doing stuff to the dick. And it's from that angle. It looks real, but you've really got to zoom in to see that it's fake.

That makes a difference to it needs to be a real dick. When you're watching porn, you got to see real dicks. You don't enjoy porn that doesn't have dicks, right? I don't want to see a fake. How else are you going to self insert? doesn't have dicks, right? I don't want to see a fake dick. I'll take that. I'll get a Snuff insert. Oh! That's literally the point of the dildo.

I was thinking, Kyle, if you see a sex scene on TV, right? This isn't like a full on porn thing, but I don't know, pick some movie with a- You for you. Sure, that one works. Do you think that you're getting insight into how these people fuck?

Or are they doing it very differently for the camera? Like I see some girl riding cowgirl and I'm like, I think that's how she fucks. I bet she fucks like that. Sometimes you can tell. So I think in all modern stuff, when you have like that sex coordinator, even between married couples,

there was a married couple who did a sex, they got a fucking sex coordinator coming I don't I just want to make sure that I don't you know offend her and it's your fucking wife fuck her in the ass Do what if you want to do? coordinator intimacy coordinator So I think that that ruins all that woody frankly But if you go back to like monsters ball when Halle Berry is Thinking about it is when you going Halle Berry's Barry is writing Billy Bob Thornton and you can see his ball

Sack is stuck to her ass when she's writing and you're like, I think he's fucking her She's riding Billy Bob right now on camera. I'm like 90% sure she He dated her forever Taking away the extra mile stuff. Shit, there was a comedy movie where that chick, April from... Oh my god, I'm so terrible with all these names. April Ludgate? Okay, I got it. Yes, April Ludgate.

You're talking about Dirty Grandpa, aren't you? Is it with... She fucks the guy from Worker. De Niro? No, no, no. He's younger. she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like,

she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she bang like that? I wonder now that is a joke for the movie. Yeah All right guys have sex however, you know, however you do it and she's like What is it Lars von Trier I believe is the name it makes a lot of horror movies But a lot of the sex stuff that like William Defoe and I forget the female actress that and that was quite real to my yeah Yeah, there's a lot we call that extra mile. There's a subreddit called extra mile It's all about that. Chloe Savigny is the most famous example. That's a subreddit? I gotta look at this. Yeah, extra mile. You're welcome. That's you sweet summer child. Extra mile is new to you.

I think it's the extra mile. Look, there's like eight billion subreddits for all sorts of stuff. New to me today. Yeah. Oh, wow. You got quite a history. Oh god damn it. Virus. I hate Texas. I'm gonna swap over to our extra mile because it's banned. Check this out. First thing I click. Oh dear user. So for those of you who are audio only, Texas has Cucked Drifter's porn habit. They're letting him know right here he needs to verify his age before they let him go. So they won't even let you watch some bitch suck a dick in a movie. For faith.

Eventually. But certain websites decided that it was too much of a legal risk for them even attempt to comply with this law and just fully pulled out. Some of them you can To my understanding still access if you submit to the state of Texas Your driver's license and let a third-party company verify your driver's license and that you're over 18 And then that company will verify your age and identity with the porn website And then you can log in through the two of them and watch porn and they're totally not keeping a log of what you're doing. So I'm more of a NordVPN kind of guy now. Now everybody knows exactly what kind of porn you're watching.

Next you just got to ship your ID right over to the government. No big deal. They're not going to blackmail you for that or something. I think it'll be all right. But where but yeah, where did we start with the sex in movies, girl, in movies? Oh, horrors. Horrors, how you like people. Yeah, your favorite type of-

You want a girl who's, for the love of the game, just a real goer. Yeah, unless you're like, it seems like now that money is involved, like you can find some niche stuff, you know? It used to be that maybe if a girl liked getting peed on, he didn't even get that on camera. We'll leave that for the outtakes.

But now, there's a lot of people. If you're gonna watch them on GetPeedOn, you want them to be very hydrated, so it's almost a clear pee, or you want them to be like a coffee drinker that morning. Well, it depends on your kink. I was actually having this conversation with my wife last night

We don't do we don't do pee-pee stuff but we had a friend in high school mutual friend that did and This guy I believe he liked women peeing on him and you would think that in a small town in the south of like 15,000 people that would be a difficult thing to find it was not this man always had girlfriends He was always getting his pit like face pissed on. He was always very happy about it. I could always say, good for you, bro, but it just seemed like you were beating the odds. Yeah, I disagree. I bet it is a lot easier to find someone who will pee on you than to find someone who'd like to be peed on. Oh yeah. Definitely. Oh yeah. Only women you know

like to pee on their faces. He's playing this game on easy mode. Right? When you were discovering this friend's, like what got him rolling, did he slow, like slow roll this confession to you? Were you like learned late in the game

that he liked face pissing? Truly, truly shameless guy. Good, honestly wholesome in a lot of ways. Son of a preacher. I think his mom and his dad were both pastors of various congregations in town. Oh, that's not right. He got married to a girl who loves pissing, I assume. He's always walking around the house. You hydrated, babe? You find some people that

just are who they are and they don't care. Like another guy, when I was in college, I found out he liked his girlfriend to stick her fingers up his ass and hit his prostate. And I actually mixed him up with another guy. So I started making fun of him. Hey, did you hear about like your roommate? And I was making fun of him to his face and he's like, you're the loser is like, prostate stuff is fun. That's Chad right there.

You're the loser. Now I'm going to stand up off my circular airplane pillow. like i'm gonna stand up off my circular airplane pillow this guy was like other redneck super conservative hunting fishing church every sunday kind of guy and he's like yeah but i love getting my asshole fingered didn't mind telling anybody about it i ain't gay it's a girl that's exactly what he said I ain't gay. It's a girl. That's exactly what he said. It's not gay if it's a girl's fingers. I remember. I mean, that's true. It isn't gay. It's the if there was a guy

in the room fingering his ass, I'd have to come down and gay. If there was even if there was a guy in the corner going, oh, I like this. Well, hang on. Backwards. So a guy can be in a room along, stroking his penis, straight. Guy can be alone, stroking his prostate. No, it's a little gay to jack off. Is it? With an audience? That's exhibitionism. That's kind of... No, no, no. All alone in a room. No, all alone in a room, he's saying it's a little gay to jack off. It's because you are, you just have to imagine that it's your dick. It's like the novel Chuck Tingle in the ass by my own ass.

Doing it all wrong. Yeah, that's what you do. I was thinking, man, Taylor's got a small piece. My opinion on what goes over his shoulder, it goes all the way back around and in. Yeah, my opinion of what gay is has It goes all the way back around and in. My opinion of what gay is has changed a ton over the years. I used to think gay was if you ever broke the seal of doing something gay with a guy. Like if you kissed a guy, you're a little gay, you bang him, you're a lot gay, and that was my measure. Almost not anymore.

That's a pretty accurate measure. No, I disagree I think you could fuck a guy once decide you don't like men and be less gay than someone who's curious and Like if you're attracted to men if your guy that makes you gay Yeah, you want to have sex with men. That is the gayness. It's not an Unbreakable like you'll that you can't go back on. He's like, no, I'm super straight. You think you don't like gay sex. I know I hate it. Uh-huh.

So yeah, yeah. If you told me you hated broccoli, right? Yet you've never tried broccoli. I wouldn't take your opinion seriously. You need to bang at least one guy. I had four bowls of broccoli on my knees and vomited all night. I know I don't like broccoli.

I mean, I think if you feel- What is 100% right here? If you haven't tried it know I don't know. I think what is 100% right here. If you haven't tried it, you don't know. For example, a personal story, the guy that harassed me for a very long time went to prison. San Antonio during the big snowstorm and power outage. This was a super straight guy. Hated trans people, gay stuff, all that. A couple of days in the prison with no power outage after coming out, all of a sudden had a much greater interest in dating trans women. Hmm. He got turned out in prison.

But he tried a thing and find out, I suppose. Exactly. A real learning moment. A man likes broccoli. Yeah. We'll see. I mean, but if it takes you to the point that a dick is in your ass. Me?

No. Until you're like, I don't like this. It took a little gayness to get to that point. Taylor, how much is too much? Like for you, how many dicks in the ass do you take before, or you would have to know that somebody took before you said, okay, they're not just figuring things out. This is a lifestyle.

Baker's dozen. 13. 13. That's perfect answer. 13. A baker. You live in a bi-flexible life, my man. Very flexible life. As long as everybody's having a good time.

Is there anything, not gay sex, but is there anything in your life like that? That like every few years you'd be like, let me try it. I want to like this thing. Yeah, Magic the Gathering and then it sucks me back in. I was going to say black licorice, but yeah, that disease of a game you exposed me to must have cost me $1,000. You should have introduced me to horse racing. Maybe a chance to win. God, if I would have just got you into it and not just at the same time, you would have had fun. It's because I played.

Dude, we were playing like three years ago, spending money, buying fucking decks on that website. It's a disease. And you've got to take a step back and look at what you're paying into. You're like, oh, my God, this is like you always joke at the laugh about the people who do like a multi-level marketing pyramid scheme stuff. But this is a fucking scam. Yeah, this is this is not even pay to win. It's like I'm buying digital cards that at any point they could just go.

Oh, I don't care about you know what this what? This set, this one's not available anymore. Like, and then they'll sell you a card for $50. And then be like, not worth anything now. Oh, now that everyone's bought this card and spent all their rares to unlock it. Oh, it turns out it's a little busted. We're going to restrict it. Only one copy per deck.

Oh, you already got just the gameplay loop. You know, like, like if you've got a deck that beats my deck, I'm not going to win. Like you're going to win 80% of these 90. I need a best role and you need a worst role for these decks to compete. I'd rather play a game where if you bring your good blue deck and I bring my good black deck or whatever, you know, whatever mechanic I'm using. Tell me more. Let's think about the blue and black. 50-50. You know, I want to be 50-50 with the sets or whatever, you know, like how we go.

That's very fun and addictive, but it's also you're right when you like step back and realize what you're doing. And like when you like I haven't put money in that game in a very, very long time now. I'm more familiar on how you play Magic together. You take the two decks and sort of dock them together. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you start out, well, you first decide the other way you decide grab in the middle is so you get the X. You have the X, and then the winner of that engagement gets to play first, the other one has to draw first. Whoever has the longest penis gets first card.

Yep. You just slap it down on the table. You measure by cards, and if it's the same number of cards, you have to go by girth, also measured by cards. Oh, game. The thickness of the card. That's good. How they'd actually do it in the game like Magic would be like, who has the marginally better body odor?

Man, that is, I know that we're all gamers and we've all gotten involved in plenty of nerdy hobbies. Like I've been into Magic long enough that like when I would see those pictures of like non-Magic playing normal people who would see a convention and be like, look at this picture from a magic, the gathering conference, there's actual shit on these chairs. I'll be like, and you can still see the lumbering beast like leaving still smells like shit. And it's like, God, why does this guy have to be into the thing? I'm in. It's like when Woody's like following his political stuff and he sees some crazy blue hair,

he's like, get out of here. I'm like, go ahead, wipe your ass. That red-haired guy with the mustache and the dress at the White House press dinner or whatever, that's the one that I always see. And I'm like, whenever the Republicans will always clap back when they're weird, eh? That would be odd. I wouldn't like that.

And they show the picture of that red haired guy with a mustache wearing a dress at the fucking guy that got caught stealing women's luggage at the airport. I don't I don't I don't know where he got his garb. I'm not suggesting he stole it from an airport. But he was it's it's crazy looking because he's not trying to be femme. It looks like a man wearing a dress. And I know that's what like bigots will sometimes say about women.

He was some kind of government official, right? What was his name? Yeah, let me just search. Democrat. Like the Department of Transportation bald hairdressers. The Department of Energy. That guy, he got arrested for felony.

He, I think stole luggage from airports. They dropped him, he was pretty much immediately removed from his position. But yeah, seemed like the guy who's on this borderline between genius and crazy like his background is extraordinary education personal lifestyle Mad scientists, I don't know. It looks like a bit of a kook Tell you guys. Oh

Before yeah, I didn't see him there with your beard or don't This is like the bearded dragon bearded drag look. Dude, just like the guy in the suit having to sit there. I got a cutaway. Normal that that that big lady in the background, is she on MSNBC or something? I have no idea. I just want to say she looks like she could headbutt me to death. Look at that fucking jawline. That's a big bitch. Cast her for Amanda Waller in the next DC movie.

Oh my God. She looks like she plays rugby. I thought he was talking about rugby in Australia or something. And the advertisement for the girls rugby league was you're tired of only bleeding once per month. I was like, that's pretty fucking cool. I like that. I like that too. Yeah. Rugby would be a cool sport.

Of all the rest of the world's sports, rugby is the one that I would be the most happy about seeing America get into. Yes. It's more dangerous than football. It's like football, but without all those sissy pads and you can just jam eyeballs and stuff with your thumb and whatnot. I wonder if it's less dangerous for CTE. It's more it's football is more dangerous for CTE.

You're right about that, because like I think it was the same issue that that hockey had where football and hockey over the past 30 years were like, hey, people are getting hit retarded in our sport. Let's make the most high quality helmets we can. And they did. And over the years, people in the NFL and NHL learned like, oh, these things are like space-age protective technology. I'll just lead with my head into that guy's spine. It's like, he's even modern anymore, though. That's exactly what happened to my spine.

Yay. Oh, yeah. A helmet hit you. What happened? So, you know, back problems. About 90% sure. My junior year of high school, I had to substitute play offensive line. Not really what I'm good at. You're not built like an offensive lineman. I went to a segregated white only private school for the richest kids in town. And I was the biggest next. Amongst them you are the offensive lineman. Yeah, so a really good football team, right? Anyway, I'm not that's not my I was defense biggest next. Amongst them, you are the offensive. Yeah. So a really good football team, right? Anyway, I'm not that's not my I was defense. I like to be in fast and like fucking people up, jump in the line, under feet, stuff like that. Tried to I couldn't move this guy out of the way.

So the guy who was my one year senior wanted to punish me for being a bad lineman. So with his head just full on rammed me right in the back and it kind of bowed my back backward and I felt something pop. Now when you're a kid, you don't you know it's sore for a day and it gets better and you think I you know, I probably sprained something. And then 20 years later, you go to the doctor and they're like, Yeah, man, one of your bones is pretty fucked up back there. Do they make you I wish the doctor would make you like feel

better when they're giving you news like that they'd be like, Oh, your back's pretty fucked up. You're pretty, you're pretty tough guy. Wow. You walked in here like this and then you, that's a good doctor. No joke. I've had so many nurses like that. They're like, you can take it, huh? You got really hot. Yeah. Yeah. This never happens to me, honestly. And I do the same to them. I do the same to them. No one died, actually. What do you do to them?

If they're giving me stitches or they're injecting me or they're taking blood, I'd be like, I bet you know what you're doing. I bet you're a fucking pro. I talk them up and I'm like, I bet you never miss a vein. How many times in a row have you hit it and not missed? What, a hundred? A thousand? I bet you're a fucking pro. Like I talk them up, I'm like, I bet you never miss a vein. How many times in a row have you hit it and not miss? What, a hundred, a thousand? Come on, be honest.

You know what you're doing. You work in this ship, you've got to. And then I'll be like, please hit my vein the first time. It's bad when they don't. Had somebody miss once. Awful. That's true.

I told the story before. I went to get blood and I'm the stupid dad joking guy. I'm like, oh, first time. And she didn't answer. She wouldn't tell me. She wouldn't admit to it being her friend. And I was like, wait, seriously? First time?

Now I'm like, all right, well, I'm your guy, right? If you need someone to give blood, take blood from the first time, I'm pretty calm. I've done this before. And my veins, people like, I don't really know how to spot an easy to see vein, but they tell me I have them. And I mentioned that one time before and they're like, Yeah, I can see it from

16 feet away, your vein is easy to find. She didn't find it. She messed it up. She and she put it in excruciatingly slow. And then she kind of freaked out and got nervous. So she pulled it out a little and then pushed it back and then no blood was coming. But blood it wasn't coming out of the needle thing but but dude it's all over my clothes it's on my shorts it's on my shirt it's on the chair thing i'm getting a little light-headed here i empathize with you so profoundly that was my exact experience oh we missed it hold up let me really rifle it a little bit like a fish or like i'm sewing and that just

made it 10 times worse so i was cool about it, kind of. I was like, hey, no hard feelings. Everything's cool. But she's going the second try, right? And they're like, yeah, yeah, we won't give you her toys in a row. So that's how it went. Were you like trying to be kind about it?

It seems like as you start bleeding, were you like, oh, whoa, haha. Best two out of three maybe. It's okay, I got just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, At some point I'm going to start going down I don't know if it's from the lack of joke kyle if you ever like oh my stars i'm getting the vapors I think they do know you have to be serious because they'll think you're joking when you i'll be like listen, right? I'm probably going to pass out or something at some point. It's not a big deal And i'm she's a medical professional. I hope but but i'm letting i'm letting her know i'm like not a big deal I'm gonna pass out. It'd be like 10 30 seconds. I'll be back up You got a wet washcloth or one of those one of those gym paper towels like that'd be very great. It'd be great

Yeah, not a big deal Just letting you know and also, you know that Camaro out front. That's mine. So You know, I am cool I just They still make cameras now their current probably going right now there was a break it's not a crazy question There was a break between so why would you 99 and 2005? No, no, no way. What's going on? I can recommend 2009 or 2010. Yeah, I feel like they brought it back out of the success of the 05 Mustang They did they absolutely did. Yeah. Oh, I feel like they brought it back out of the success of the 05 Mustang. They did. They absolutely did. Yeah. Oh, I remember seeing the designs for that car or the concept drawing

in 2005. I mean, oh, that's going to destroy the Mustang. It did. It's such a cool car. When did all those like those cars come out? The Camaro. The Mustangs. Was that like the 50s? That those? the Mustangs, was that like the 50s? That those be like. That's the new Camaro. It vibes Bugatti to my mind. 60s. I like a bigger like a bigger front on a muscle car. It makes it look kind of cool,

but I don't know that looks nice. Also Zach says it's going to be an electric vehicle soon. Yeah, I fake sound. I don't want to sound like a V8. Stupid, that's what they do. Didn't Harley do that or some? Some company did that. They sound like a V8. Stupid. That's what they do. Didn't Harley do that? Or some company did that.

They built like an electric Hyundai. They built an electric bike and then added like big subwoofers and speakers so that you still feel like a big man when you drive it around. I think that part is stupid, but I've learned that it is very important for motorcycles to make noise because drivers don't always see them. They don't hear me either. And the noise goes behind you You know when they do hear you when you're that black Harley rider who has like a motorcycle slash DJ booth

Those guys have speakers and shit attached to their fucking big ass motorcycles and when they ride through town, it's just like oh my god You're you're just a mobile jamboree over there. It's so loud and obnoxious. It's going on where you live. Oh, that's a Harley's come with speakers like that. My Goldwing has speakers like that, but I never use them. I prefer him in my helmet. Yeah, that would be, I don't want anything in my helmet. I haven't ridden in like month and a half.

Yeah, it was hot. I remember that. But like, I never want anything in my headset cause I want to be able to hear I'm so it's like Playing like Tarkov or something with music playing I could never do that I'm like, you know I think the no if somebody's not laying on the horn right now because they're sliding into me holding the brakes down But it can be putting their head out the car just screaming at you. I'm gonna kill you and your whole fat You have no idea. I need to hear it. I need to hear that too

But yeah, I didn't want the the Bluetooth in the helmet I didn't want speakers or anything because I'm scared of not being able to hear around me I'm already pretty scared if I'm in big traffic Traffic's the scary thing Atlanta's just absurd right? Oh my god riding that thing on like 285 going on six five six lanes of traffic It's like I hope you all see me That's the one with the HOV lane. I Don't know. It's it's the one that's the big circle around Atlanta itself. And then I 85 comes in from

northeast and Goes to southwest and then 40 and 75 go south to north and one way or another I was in traffic in Atlanta and there was an HOV lane that I wasn't paying for that That like for a car They have these like pylons or something on there make you really know you can't go that way But to a bike they look like suggestions And I weaved in and out. And Jackie's like, huh, $85 ticket. I was like, Yeah, I earned that one. Yeah, anyone Jackie, you believe everything? Yeah, they mail them to you. You got to get

what's called a peach pass, which allows you to be in that lane or just hide your license plate. I think the easy pass, they're all cross compatible now, but I don't have a good one, a good place for it on my bike. Yeah, really? I don't know what it looks like though. I don't have one. Oh, I thought it was like they just registered your license plate. No, no, no, no, you get a device so that you can be in the HOV HOV lane And it's a big deal Atlanta it if you have to go up 85 and down it every day It's like all the lanes are stationary except for that good one for there. That's That's the like The thing that I dislike the most about driving in other states is the tolls

Like all the whole states are so fucking obnoxious Florida has everywhere on the East. Florida's battles. Texas has a text. Most of the new highways and roads are tolls like I get on George all the way all the time. Some people take crazy, weird routes around the city to avoid the tolls and save two dollars, but they probably burn more gas doing that.

I think in general, states with no income tax have a heavy toll system on their roads. Florida does it because it's a neat way to charge the tourists. Like the tolls that go from Orlando to Disney World are outrageous. Yes you get a roll of quarters. It's been that way for a long time. Last time I was down there I was smart. I remembered the time before and I traveled with a roll of quarters stuck on the dash and I was like like, we're not going to fuck this up again. Cause we were having to like, well, what are we going to do? Dig through your pockets. Find me.

You better find me a dollar 75 right now. Or we got to pull the fuck over right here. Can you break a 50? 95 cents. Dude, it's a total like the whole East half of the U S has tolls so many more than that. Missouri's red on the right back, which apparently is state collects tolls but does not use electronic tolling. I've never seen a toll in Missouri. I've driven all over the state, so I don't know. Am I in trouble? Some lane bridge. They'll make you use the bridge. Or you should check to see if maybe

you have a warrant for all the, the you're like the white whale in Seinfeld Seinfeld You know, I think if I I think I would notice a toll driving by them by now in my mid-30s That I haven't in New Jersey. I don't know if it's still this way but when I was a teenager they had privately owned bridges just like some family would have an essential bridge to that portion of the state. And yeah, they just collect the money themselves. They choose the amount of the toll. It wasn't regulated or anything. They're just like,

this is the most people will pay without driving around. Wow. I don't know you could do that. What a ripoff. Yeah. There aren't too many in Atlanta, but there's a couple. Yeah, I don't like that. No more tolls. Why? They pay for the roads. But the drivers are paying for the road instead of someone who's not. Why should a guy who doesn't use that road pay taxes? It's inconvenient to me, man. I don't like that. I want to pay for them. Can we have that? No, not for you. that's for other people. Yes.

That's for anyone who went to college in the last ever. They get the free things. Yes, they get all that money for their college fucking loans, knock out the whole toll system, one fell swoop. Everyone's soaked. Yeah. Yeah, that was policy i don't like either yeah yeah and it's not not fair like people talk about pulling the ladder up behind you and stuff and it's like yeah that's not fair that's not fair to say like like like it's either right or it's

wrong regardless of of anything else and it just seems like you took out a loan was it a predatory loan yes were you 18 years old? Also? Yes All right, and then nobody's I bet there's a lot of guys in the army in the marine corps right now Who are like fuck what did I say? Right, I mean, yeah, i'm 18 next month. They let me sign they let me sign They'll let you sign months before you're 18. I think as long as you're 18 when you enlist really I didn't know that I could be wrong. I probably just made that up. seems like a thing they do though right you're like I remember something about that you know yeah I will join when he's 14 had to lie

who who did Cotton Hill Oh cotton yeah he was a hero and he killed 50 men so he did kill 50 man what are we talking about he was a hero although and Iwo Jima he was also in Germany. He fought in Germany and Japan. Probably wasn't in Germany. That was probably a lie. But they did shoot his shins off with a Jap machine gun. I did like that, where he'd been going around

for like 60 years saying that he fought in Germany and Peggy's like, Cotton, you did not fight in Germany. And he's like, yeah! Yeah! It appears I didn't. And then he just. Oh no, he straight up lied. He was like yeah it appears I didn't. Oh no he's straight up live he was like yes it did well then you didn't fight in Saipan. Yes I did. His stories would be like like he was they were shipping him across the sea they're

shipping us across the sea in a Japs torpedoed our PT boat we went down. I could only say three minutes. They're talking about a good cartoon. cartoon. I'm like trying to put context clues together here to figure out what's going on. We're talking about the greatest generation, Woody. Greatest generation, Cotton Hill. Now you are in bed, and we're not gonna be fooled by it. Yeah, yeah, no, this bed is real. I'm doing a lot better, like tremendously,

but I'm not sit up three hours for a podcast level better. I'm still a little limited. Say that again. We barely are. By the end we'll just collapse like a marionette. So what, all right, let's do this. How are you feeling? What do you have now?

I don't have anything new. I think I have less things going on and I feel a lot better. The entirety of the story since last time is I got treated for the tick-borne illnesses, the nasty ones. I was better for about two months and then in the spring I started feeling super shitty again. Went back and tested, still positive, went back to the doctor and the doctor's like,

okay, we'll do it again, but more extreme this time. So I took a TovaQuone, azithromycin and clindamycin and about the highest doses that you can take at home for about as long as you can. Anything more I would have probably need to check into a hospital for. Cleaned you out. Yeah, oh, it did.

Yeah, a TovaQuone is anti-malarial. It looks like paint thinner, tastes like paint thinner, terrible stuff. Chlamydia no more. Did all that, pretty rapidly started feeling better. I have made more progress since the treatment ended in June. I've made more progress since then than I have in the last three years. Literally Tuesday. So two days ago I graduated PT.

They said I was so healthy it was not necessary for me to be there. I can continue working out building strength at home Standing time increased driving time increased sitting time sitting is slightly relaxing instead of horrible So like if I sort of it used to be like I'll go to the grocery store And then I'm fucking cooked and I need to take like a two-hour break Now I can just sit for like 10 minutes and then go do a different thing and it's not such a big deal you know, we're stacking multiple things and Honestly, almost everything is better. I'm a long way from well

I kind of went through hell on this one but the trend is good and I'm praying to God and Everything holy that every little creepy crawly in my body is dead for good and I never ever ever have to drink Tova clone ever again What is the whole thing? ever ever have to drink TovaClone ever again. What is the whole thing? Is that it? That's the malaria drug. It's an anti-malarial drug.

It looks like highlighter fluid and tastes pretty similar. You mix it with milk and then drink it and it absolutely cleans you out. Yeah, because it has to have fatty foods. So I would eat like like fatty burgers and pork and drink this gross shins. Milk is terrible. It was it was not fun. We cut the treatment about two weeks short because it was starting to give me some heart troubles. I think the azithromycin or maybe clinda, I can't remember which one can cause heart palpitations. I was starting to get

those. So we pulled it a little early. Is that antibiotic? The azithromycin? Yeah. Yeah. They're all antibiotics and it seems to have worked. I'm on three months post treatment, constant progress. Everything feels a lot more normal. You know, it used to be like I told you stories like I would pour the cereal milk and sprain my wrist and it was just done for like three weeks. No more of that bullshit. A lot more resilience. If I sprained something, if I hurt something, I fell down the stairs the other day. It's like normal, like a step or two.

It's like normal, it's like you hurt something and you rest it a couple hours, a day or so, it's fine. I'm doing that train now instead of, oh, I hurt something, well, there goes the month. So it's all very positive, no new diagnoses, no doctor visits, no anything. We're actually minimizing things. I'm going to attempt to return to some version of normal,

like a lesser version of normal. I've gone from being like 90 years old to maybe like 60. So. How old are you actually? 37, felt like 90 for a long time. So it's all very positive. If you, if all these high tech solutions don't end up working, at some point, you need to go to a faith healer or something, right?

You just got to, you got to invest in some alternative approaches. And I'm not being bigoted whatsoever. I say, no, he'll go to a lesbian. Try all the different religions, but not all at once, like, be all in on one. And then if that doesn't work, then you can be like, all right, back and back and away from that clearly. Fucking Islam isn't the solution here. Let's strike Christianity. Oh, well, you know, I feel a lot better. And then you because if you try to do them all at once, whoever is a god is going to see you should be a lime doctor. I briefly attempted to engage with the Lyme because I didn't

have Lyme, but had a couple of diseases, very similar kind of in the same family, the Lyme community, the most scammy, ridiculous, anti-science, ridiculous, conspiracy driven bullshit I've seen in my life since QAnon. And I shit you not. I went to like the, there's like a website where they'll refer to you Ly lime literate doctors in your area Doctors that have expertise in lime and will treat you outside of the normal medical system because doctors don't understand this rare disease First one was a naturopath who sold for $25 a bottle prayer prescriptions They were little pieces of paper with prayers cut up in a bottle. And he would prescribe you these prayers to read once a day for $25. He literally on the site, it said Christian and Jewish prayers only Islamic prayers don't

work because Allah doesn't exist. Whoa, yeah, all sorts of religious stuff, all sorts of faith healing vitamins. This huge amount of people are trying like weird herbs, like some sort of protocol where you take like 37 herbs. The other doctor referred to me in my area, I found out, doesn't have a practice. Why you might ask? Because he's in jail for writing prescriptions to sell the drugs for, like he was just writing prescriptions for himself and selling them. It was wild. It was a terrible, terrible experience. Yeah. He's just a drug dealer. That's what a doctor does. That's what a lot of them are. A lot of them are drug dealers. I guess they're all drug

dealers in that way. Yeah. Lime community is terrible, horrible, conspiracy written. Isn't it one of the diseases where like, they genuinely really don't know a lot about it though? Yes. And that's the ironic part is instead of being pissed off at these people like QAnon or like anti-vax guys, I've kind of gone through this myself. I feel for them. The education around this topic is very minimal in med school, even for something like Lyme, which you've all heard of, you would be shocked at how many times you go to a medical professional and they say, Nope, that's impossible. Now we're not going to test. Now I've had doctors tell me Lyme's

not real. It's just people stressed out and they imagine their symptoms. Just like all sorts of wacky stuff. So you have a huge community of people. It affects like a hundred thousand people a year. You get all these weird fucked up body wide symptoms and arthritis at 25 and stuff like that. And almost everybody's experience. Huh?

I'm so glad I don't have Lyme disease. I've been bitten by so many ticks in the woods. I've been ticked up and I never got any. You could have got what I got from those ticks. You don't want it. But I feel for these people because they go to doctors, they have the same experience I have. Well, you've got anxiety, you're stressed out.

This is hypochondriasis. This is some sort of munch house and this is nonsense. None of this makes any sense. Go get therapy, go away. And these people that are fucked up by Lyme can't even get tested for it. And they're desperate and in horrible pain. And the only people offering them solutions

are all sorts of crummy, like naturopaths and homeopathic doctors, and go to a chiropractor for your Lyme treatment. But they'll take you seriously. They'll listen to you instead of telling you to go piss off. But they'll just tell you- Counterpoint, did you even try any placebo? Fuck no.

You didn't try the prayer sheets. You should have had some sugar pills and some prayer and see if it cured you. I mean, it is, it's like, uh, it's definitely like a more comfortable thing to imagine that like a doctor knows. Like when you, if you, something's wrong with you and you go in, like you want to believe they have like total knowledge of the subject and can just be like, bing bang, boom, this like you want to believe they have like total knowledge of the subject and can just be like, bing bang boom, this is what needs to happen. But like,

if you know doctors in your personal life and I've ever heard them talk about something as like benign as nutrition, you're like, Oh fuck. Like there are a huge number of blind spots in these people's work. As of course it would. I've never once had a doctor figure my thing out. I swear to God, every time I've been to a doctor, I figured the thing out. I came in I was like hey, it's folliculitis Yeah, yeah, it's folliculitis. I got to keep that hot tub clean. Let me take a look. Yep. That's folliculitis All right, or that time I had fucking syphilis and they were giving me um, um, what's that? God prednisone? They're gonna be prednisone for syphilis. I don't think that's

God, prednisone, they're gonna be prednisone for syphilis. I don't think that's what they're doing. What the fuck does that do? Prednisone is a steroid. Yeah. But not a good one. Not a good one. You need antibiotics for something. I didn't even get biceps.

Yeah, shot in the ass cures it. I had to go, I had been going to that doctor two or three times for the syphilis symptoms. And she had me using olive oil on my hands and fucking taking prednisone. I was wearing the hell you're waking up in the morning, putting olive oil on your hands. How much is coming off? Can you show by the end?

The whole Palm was like, the skin was gone like down to this. You like de-gloved almost top layer. It goes down to this pink baby layer that you have to be so careful with. So like I would wear surgical gloves full of olive oil all the time, all the time, like all that. I'm gaming. I'm gaming with olive oil. No, no, no. Yes. I'd sleep with it. I'd sleep with it. Did it hurt your KD ratio? Did you go to a restaurant or go shopping with your cereal killer gloves? I had my olive oil gloves on and then I put tactical videos like that. I can't grab it. Go shopping with your serial killer gloves. I had my... Sure, no outside condiments. I had my olive oil gloves on and then I put tactical gloves over that to make YouTube

videos. Hello, my friends. I am syphilis riddled and I smell like an olive garden. It's time to blow up a refrigerator and then go back to moistening my plum. And the bottom of the... I gotta hand it to you. That's very Chadly. It is Chad Chattel's on my feet, too. They were they were peeling off, but not nearly as bad.

But my whole palms by the end were just this this pink skin that was so tender and like painful. How fast did it start happening? Was it like, oh, that's weird. My my palm is there some loose skin or is it like starts with like a little like like dead white like circle of skin that you sort of pick it and starts with like a little like like dead white like circle of skin that you sort of pick it and scratch off you know like like oh athlete's foot maybe no this is a bacterial thing it'll be it like and and

it'll just like spread and you just like keep and there'll be like a perimeter that's sort of ragged and hanging off you're like oh let me pick that loose skin off but you just keep going until there's none left. I just keep going until there's none left. Dude, if you wouldn't have gotten that taken care of, the- Neuro-syphilis. I'm pretty sure the way that syphilis goes is you would, eventually your palms and the soles of your feet

would have gone back to normal on their own. And then you would have been in like a 10 to 20 year waiting period until you became- Neuro-syphilis. Al Capone. Alis alcapone alcapone yeah yeah it eats your brain yeah you go asymptomatic including your non-transmit uh midive after like a year or two years or something like that or maybe even sooner yeah um yeah but but how do you miss or ignore all the skin falling off i'm just on the internet i was genuinely on google

images searching like skin peeling off palms going from and there are some gross pictures when you do that. And I'm just looking for the palms that look like my level of gross. I'm like that kind of looks like mine. You're looking down at the slipperiest keyboard you've ever seen. Yeah, those are not pleasant images. After a while your palms heal up but then you go crazy and you get really into amateur porn, police videos and women fighting cars. Yep, that happens. What do you say? Women fighting cars. I got to clarify.

Women are you boxing martial arts? Are they just getting a parking lot battle? Typically, it starts with maybe two humans and then escalates to man be car yes it's my favorite genre of youtube video yeah i was describing kyle with that yeah cars are undefeated no i really enjoy so what happens is you'll have some sassy black ladies in a parking lot and they'll be getting rowdy and sometimes you're just outmatched by your opponent you know it's that guy at the dnc earlier that woman with that big ass chin i mean look if you're like outmatched by your opponent. You know, it's that guy at the DNC earlier, that woman with that big ass chin. I mean, look, if you're like a Rihanna sized woman, can you imagine having a beef with that big bitch?

It's like, what are you going to do? Like even as a man, like some men, I was in the gas station the other day and this this this fellow in front of me, you had to be like five to or something. I was like, I could I could murder you right here with my bare hands. Like he's barely another person. That's what you went to, right? That's murder. I feel like you're describing the public freak out subreddit.

I could beat you up and steal this nice for loco you're purchasing for yourself. After your work. Those are illegal now. So those gals will go back to their vehicle and they'll start running motherfuckers over. And I love this video because the thing about those people, when they get mad, they think they can take a car sometimes, or at least they think it'll be a tussle at first.

So they'd be like, what are you going to do? You're going to hit me with the car. And it's like they're all of a sudden. They're pinned between between two cars and they're screaming my hip, my hip. It's like you hip for this. Yeah, it's like I'm sure you've seen you pull a gun and be like what you ain't gonna do shit. You ain't gonna shoot me. I dare you to shoot me and you pow. You shot me. Why? Final words, what are you gonna do? Shoot me? I genuinely saw that the other day. The person's got a gun and he's like, I'll shoot you. I'll

shoot you. What you gonna do? Shoot me with your gun. Shoot me. Shoot me. Bang! Oh, it's, it shot me. She shot me. And she's like, you asked for it. I think I saw that same video. It was so good. I watched it like four times. Yeah. I can't imagine not trying to deescalate a person with a gun or slink out in a cowardly manner. That's what I would do. But he's probably cowardly. He'd be like, give me your wallet too! And I'd be like, I'm gonna give you candy. And they'd be like, oh he probably doesn't have money. In my dreams I get to leave with my like integrity and tact like, you know what? I don't have time for this. It's not your gun that scares me. I'm just a very busy person so I'm leaving. You guys do you. But me, I'm getting out of here.

I fucking run. I fucking run. I saw a dude pull a goddamn Draco out of his backpack at a 7-Eleven the other day. What's a Draco? It's a Mini AK. Like a Magnetic? It's a Mini AK-47 and just start blasting at people. You saw this online, not in person.

No, I wish. It's becoming more and more like Robocopop the United States and I'm here for it All right. That's it. That's a fucking movie. It's the dystopia We were promised as a childhood and our childhood we could promise a punch right around and just have casual gunfights and blow Things up like RoboCop and the crow. I Didn't like the crow. I don't like rape in movies a little upsetting Hmm. There you go. Yeah. You pull that bad boy out of your backpack.

That's a pistol, I guess. It is there. Yeah. Yeah. Pistols are a spectrum. It doesn't sound like a good gas station robbing gun to. I don't know. I watched I watched somebody in those videos and and it's people. It's 30 and people making like stupid decisions.

I saw one the other day. There's two guys in a car. The police have pulled them over They're stopped the passenger will not roll his window down and they are talking to him and they can see between his legs also a draco Like on the and they're like do not reach for that gun do not and they're like Two guys are aiming pistols at his skull right outside the window i mean like outside the window like right there you do not reach for that pistol i will kill you he reached for it he reached they killed they killed the shit out of him pretty much suicide they shot that's the normal thing the driver gets out and is like, fuck, like walking away and like, they shot the shit out of him because we're right here, bro. Like, what I always wonder, like, I guess I get it.

They're like just trying to suicide by cop or they're like, you won't take me alive. Like that attitude. I could understand. I could get myself in that head space even. But what I don't understand is like, did you think you're gonna like shoot your way out of this? Like Jason Bourne and then sure disappear into the countryside with European white percent chance? If they already have you at gunpoint. It's like, it's like, do you remember as a kid, the first time you played paintball, you have in your head, this imagining of like,

and I'm gonna pop out, and I'm gonna pop, pop, pop, shoot them before they can shoot me, because you've just seen movies and yourself inserting as the main character who's gonna do all this. Like it seems like an extension of that. This guy's like, I'm pretty quick. I'm pretty quick to grab my gun. It's right here. These stupid pigs probably won't even. I've seen John Wick three times. I was gonna say nowadays the stars usually know some sort of gun foo, right? Like John Wick and he just hits everything and reloads amazingly. Back in the day, it wasn't even that. They held a machine gun with endless bullets

and just slowly went through the crowd. It fired. It would get hundreds of kills while everybody else missed. Commando. And I thought, you know, war, it's actually pretty easy. Pretty sick too. If you're like one of the main guys, war is a cinch. Yeah, I thought that's how it would go if I was in war. I'm 10 at this point. Pretty sick too. Where's, if you're like one of the main guys, where's the cinch?

I thought that's how it would go. If I was more, I'm 10 at this point. I was like, if they got me that gun, I could win. Yeah. That's what it's about. Yeah. That, do you remember like not having a conception of death at like a very, very young age where like, like the thought of you dying was so weird. It's like, but everything else is going to keep,

I remember thinking, I was probably like five. Like if I got my head run over by a truck, it's like everything just- That truck would be destroyed. The truck would be destroyed, yeah. But I was like, oh, that's so crazy. I'm going to die someday. I think you're describing the invention of religion.

It's people that cannot comprehend not existing. Some of us will get taken up. Some of you, no. You could get raptured. The aliens are gonna get you. No, not aliens. I'm talking about the rapture. Oh yeah, but to be fair though, if the rapture happens, I'm pretty sure all of us will still be here to just do another PKA episode. I don't think that's gonna affect anything. Absolutely not. I've asked God to forgive me for my sins after every one of these. I'm solid. Yeah, it's like a little re-up. It's like, yes, yes, please. Before I pray, always before I pray, I'd be like, hey, forgive me for all my sins. All right, now I need a few things.

It's like, sorry I was bad. And then like a wish list for Santa. That's so sorry. I've been really screwing the pooch on a lot of these rules, but I really need my friend to be able to make it to this Florida trip. And if you can clear up his schedule, I'd remember that next time I'm really in sin. You pray for little things like that. I pray to win the lottery and shit like that as a kid. I was, I don't remember ever praying to win the lottery.

I was like, let me win the lottery. I don't have to do anything. You can't play the lottery as a child. Yeah, my parents can. No, my parents didn't play the lottery. Yeah. I remember watching that Macaulay Culkin movie, Richie Rich or something. And then Blank Check, that other movie. Yes, I've seen Blank Check. And so I had this fantasy about like being a child with millions of dollars to just blow on orangutans and limousines and hot punch sundaes. You'll get a 27 year old girlfriend and you have a butler and you do all of this for one million dollars. I think that was thinking of one million dollars from the least secure bank in America. Yeah it didn't make a lot of sense the premise of that

movie. It was a child's movie where he bought an orangutan with a million dollars of gangster cash though. So I let it slide. Honestly, that movie did give me a lot of daydreaming fantasies too, as a young kid, because I'm like, man, I would do the slide thing, but I wouldn't have wasted money on the car because I'm only like nine anyway. I can't drive it. And I would have had a big party for all my friends. I would have had a big party for all my friends. I would have bought a, I think like a skating rink is probably something I was into at the time. Buying activities, buying paintball guns. Man, that would be great. Justin Perdue I used to go on paintball websites and just look.

Jeff Harris Same. I used to go to, what was it called? There was an 88 paintball was one of the sites that had a ton of guns and of guns and stuff and I had a mini gun on there I remember being in high school supposed to be doing work and I'm on like paintball.com looking at this paintball mini gun and I'm like what do you mean it's $1,200 that's more money than I can imagine. I remember being like nine on those nine ten years old on those websites and being like oh man I remember being like nine on those nine, 10 years old on those websites and being like, oh man, an angel x344 is $1,100. That's awesome. Yes. I have zero dollars. I have 11. Just get the hundred. I had a week allowance. If I can wait until I'm

17, maybe I can afford it if it's on sale. If it's still at the top of the line and I still want it, I can get this. There were two guns that I dreamt about that I wanted so bad. One was at Walmart actually. When you go to Walmart, they had the gun section and just to the left of all the real guns, they had the paintball guns and they had a gun called a Rainmaker. Zach, can you find, probably made by Daisy or somebody, the Rainmaker paintball gun? a rainmaker. Zach, can you find probably made by Daisy or somebody the rainmaker paintball gun? Because as a little kid, that's what I wanted so bad. It's probably a piece of shit now. But then later when I got the internet, this thing looks cool as hell. I wanted the angel so bad. The angel was like you said, well over

a thousand dollars when you kidded it out. And this was in the nineties or the early, early 2000s, this thousand dollar paintball gun. So it was it was a lot of money. The brass eagle rainmaker. I remember having like a couple of brass eagle pump guns. Yeah. Oh dude, I wanted this. See the thing about this, fully automatic. Okay. This was an electric. You could just hold down the trigger and hose. This was an electronic fully automatic paintball gun and everything we had was pneumatic or whatever where like you were actuating a solenoid or something with a trigger pull and everything was air powered and Each you had to actually manually pull the trigger that thing was a one of the first electronic guns. I would guess everything looks stupid Yeah, now it does you got to imagine it was 2001 or no it was like 1998 or something for this

I mean Independence Day had like just hit VHS when this thing was coming out. Like that movie is still good. No, it's not. It's aged well. I haven't seen it in so long. But you're right, if this was fully automatic, that was a huge game changer.

You would have been the only guy on the field that could just like do tricks and spray. You weren't fooling with your gas canisters. It makes such a big difference. You have a tap a lot. You were, buting with your gas canisters. You make such a big difference. You were, but also you didn't have automatic hoppers back then. And so you'd get like five,

even if you had a fast shooting gun, you had to shooka shooka shooka constantly. We played paintball once and there were five people with good guns against like 75 people with bad guns on like a football field sort of thing with obstacles. And the five people beat the 75. We fucked them up.

My dumb ass thought we were pretty good at paintball. Yeah. Well, yeah, there were some kids, but they weren't like kids, kids. Most of them were older teens, maybe worthy opponents. But the one that Eric yelled at was, hit me in the cry. He'll never live that down. I won't let him. He'll never live that down. I won't let him.

I forgot about that. Yeah, there was some bad ones. No, it was a good time. It was, it was more narrow even than a football field point, the way I remember it. It was, it was all netted in and there were obstacle courses. They couldn't flank us. And we had all the free paintballs that money didn't need to buy. And we had, we had good guns and they couldn't advance on us because we just had a never-ending like hail of gunfire in them it was fun we fucked them up

we fucked them up that was fun on our side and i would kill me now looking back because i actually thought it was because like you know me and my friends are pretty good and then i used a tip man like a manual one they're talking about was like, Oh my gosh, this is such a bitch. Oh, it's impossible. You can have someone dead to rights and it'll just go right over their head. Equipment matters to bring it back around. We were talking about World War Two at the beginning, like, you know, Japan invaded China.

They industrialized a little faster, a little better. They had automatics, better weapons. China had like bolt action rifles and like wooden bullets and they would send out two soldiers with one rifle. So if one dies, the other one can pick it up and stuff like that. That kind of equipment difference is massive. Was China the, I don't know, was it Mao, the ruler at one point who was like, we need a lot of peasants to have weapons.

So I'm ordering people to melt down their like pig iron quality pitchforks and make it into shitty swords. And they like destroyed an enormous part. Oh, are you talking about different? No, I'm saying like, didn't Mao do that? Like, I know he did the bird thing. And then didn't he also force farmers to like create weapons out of their farming tools and then basically just or turn in their farming tools to become metal for the war. But none of it was the quality necessary. He wanted to literally turn swords into plowsheers or something. Yeah. The inverse. Yeah. There's a lot of that like political minded dictators, this top to bottom like, I don't like the way things are. They're now like this. And then the society just is destroyed. Yeah,

that turns out we need those. We needed those birds a lot. I think you're talking about the birds that they killed them all. And then it caused the famine because they were part of the ecosystem or something. Yeah, we talked about he was a bit of a coot. And then and so without the sparrows, the bugs were everywhere and they ate all the crops and the people all starved to death. And then Paul Pot, I think, did a thing where like he was like anybody with glasses did. In Cambodia? Yeah. He was like, oh, you can you can read, bitch, you're done. Anyone with glasses was considered like an intellectual of like the other like bourgeois class. They had to go. Makes sense.

They had to go. Yeah. That was the Khmer Rouge, right? It was horrible. You guys would be in trouble, huh? God damn. But you know, have the perspective. You'd be walking around like... Reading a story about a guy who was a surgeon and his wife had a surgical issue that was in his expertise and he could have saved her, but if he'd done the surgery, he would have outed himself as like a former intellectual and they both would have been put to death and how like horrible that was. And anti-intellectualism is frightening to me. I'm terrified. That's coming in America. I feel like we're waging wars on libraries and colleges right now and public

schools and almost anything in there. All right. The preschools with blow job tutorials. That's all. That's all. Some people don't like that. That's almost like not a thing. Like 99% of that is not real. So I have a in-law who works in the library system

and they have people come and protest the library and send threats and angry letters and stuff about books that the library doesn't even carry. They'll get like death threats from people out of state for books that the library has never even purchased. And it's pretty horrible. Like the librarians are by and large trying to find new careers and quitting.

There was one story, I don't ever know if it made the news that somebody tried to check one of the librarians out of school. Like they said they were an aunt and they tried to check their kids to kidnap them over some of this book ban nonsense. It was fucking crazy. Crazy is right. Yeah, I... Chasing ghosts, right? You know, like the critical race theory determined the governor of Virginia, and they don't even teach it in Virginia, but they campaigned on it. So effectively Republicans won. It definitely does happen. A friend of mine who's on the school board locally showed me photos from books

they were putting in libraries for kids. And it was troubling, like teaching oral sex, teaching like weird. You want to live in a world where people give toothy blowjobs, it sounds like, and I'm not for it. Yeah. I don't think it's like a sex education book. Like what age are we talking here? Cause his kids are young. Like this would have been available in the same place that like kindergartners are finding where's Waldo. That's probably too extreme. Probably put that in the teenage section, but I do know they also started teaching that to some kids because kids don't have a good idea of what's a good touch and bad touch. So part of early sex education is teaching kids to know when they're being

preyed on. So you have to teach them some of these, uh, more advanced techniques so that they know to report it. Yeah. But like you could do that the way we always have where it's like, Hey, like I remember my parents giving me that talk, like my mom being like, you're, if like anyone, but your doctor or us, like needs to see your private area. That's a huge no. And you need to tell us right away. If that happened, tell me that they said that didn't that did not involve me needing a book that showed like how to give head or anything like that.

Kyle, because dirty old men will kidnap you and they'll take you away and they'll lock you because you're desire. I remember I remember being told and I know this doesn't make any sense but that they would take a cat's claws and scratch me to torture me I remember because I genuinely when I'm talking about hell four or five I had this image of fearing being kidnapped by like bad men in public and they're gonna torture me with cats they're gonna have like cat scratch like like angry cats just tearing into you. Like right in my mind.

You're like thrown into the back of a van and you're like breathing a sigh of relief because there are no cats around. I genuinely, I remember that. Like, but I remember it being like the cat's claws being raked from top to bottom down your back and like really scratching you up. And to me as a four year old,

it's like the worst imaginable thing. It would be pretty terrible. Cat mauling by strangers, don't let them kidnap me. No, sir. I'll be vigilant. But nobody told me anything about a good touch or a bad touch. But still, it was not a long conversation. It was like your doctor or us. It was the kidnappers that we were afraid of. I don't think there was even any danger sign that like somebody around you might be getting after you. It was a satanic panic era that they would roll up in a van that says free candy and snatch the kids. There was no conversation. Was that real Woody? Yes.

I know well there's people afraid of the devil worshipers coming to get you. Yes that was super yeah people there's another fucking ghost being chased back in the day but yeah I told you guys about this years ago so maybe the story is new again. When I was 12, I first moved to Ocean City. And that was back when there were arcades, like to play video games, you'd go to the arcade and pump in quarters. At the back, there were pool tables.

And this dude taught me how to play pool. Having like an adult salary, it seemed like it was an endless amount of money where he paid for all the pool games. And he just seemed to enjoy my company as a 12 year old. I was pretty charming, I suppose. And so we'd play and play. And then eventually, and this was like my,

the candy that would have worked on me. He said he had a brand new banging stereo system back at his apartment and that I should come see it. And I was like, that sounds amazing. He's like, speakers are as tall as you are. And I'm like, whoa, like this is, but, and I was right on the edge. I can fit you in one of those.

I was like, maybe, cause I, that played it better than candy to my 12 year old head. He told you it was a banging sound system. And yet you chose to continue. Like a lame-o, I was like, ah, I don't think so. He told you what you were gonna do while you were listening to the sound. I see what you could do, yeah, I took your second.

Hey, what choice, you saved your bi-curiosity for later. I think it's probably for the best. I remember this guy had the coolest pull trick ever. He's like, watch this. And he puts the pool stick across the table. And he says, I can slide a pool ball underneath it. And I'm like, what? And I tested it, you know, the whole way it doesn't fit or anything. Like, what? It doesn't fit. How can you slide it? And he slides it under the whole table on the floor. Genius. They're genius. And all the 11 year olds are applauding this, this 41 year old man who's just the bell of the ball.

Adult money at an arcade was like a superpower to me. I saw a guy, he had so much money, he could pay my favorite game. And he just pump in more quarters and more quarters. We all line up behind him to watch. He'd make it to the end because he had, like, he could never run out of money. He was there in his postman uniform, right? Like, this isn't a rich, rich man. But in my mind, you deliver mail, you have all the quarters you want. Sean O'Toole-Terry And getting, getting captured by a pedophile back then is like the inverse of sports progression. Like actually notice this, a pedophile now has to be way more on the ball to kidnap a kid than back in the eighties.

Just like an eighties NFL player could not hack it today. An eighties NHL player, okay, fine, Wayne Greskey. Other than him, most of them couldn't. These pedophiles in the eighties, you know, they were in the good old days of their disgusting hobby. And you don't know it's the good old days. And now, Taylor, I just agree.

Because nowadays, children are taught how to blow properly at the library. When it was back in the 80s, they had no idea. They might be the case. I don't know. You've made a strong point. Kidnapping kids these days is harder because they have cell phones and like life 360 tracking. That giant ginger will show up and beat the shit out of you. Also kids today just generally heavy or harder to lift.

That's a good point. That's right. What if that was a umbrage that pedophiles took? They're like, the kids are too fat. Make sure you piss your parents off. They pick you up by like one hand and sling you around. You can't do that with kids these days. They weigh like, I'm sure you pissed your parents off. They pick you up by like one hand and sling you around. Can't do that with kids these days. They weigh like 900 pounds. That's the real biggest problem. And that's what I like the most about old Michelle Obama, is she was trying to get the fat kids under control. She tried. I don't know how serious she was about it because I still saw pictures of like, pizza being served to kids, which I guess you can't take pizza away from kids because that's the whole, that would keep me going sometimes. That would get me a Wednesday.

I think Michelle Obama really tried. It's almost like one of these classic neoliberal failures. She recognized that there was a problem with the nutrition in schools. Kids were eating junk food, school lunches sucked, they couldn't afford it. She wanted to redo American lunches. Because you ever see the little memes online, American school lunches sucked, they couldn't afford it. She wanted to redo American lunches. Cause you ever see the little memes online, American school lunches are pathetic compared even to like second and third world country kids school lunches. It's embarrassing.

America might as well just be saying, fuck those kids. So she encouraged her husband and what limited she could do as first lady to get schools to go healthier. Healthier food costs more money. Fresh vegetables, salad, greens, things that are cooked right might cost twice as much. So schools found themselves in a funding problem trying to meet these new regulations.

And some, I believe it was states, I'm not sure if it was a nationwide thing, they would vote on the crazy stuff like pizza is a vegetable because pizza is, if you think it's like it's bread and there's tomatoes, and there's like onions. Yeah, ketchup is a vegetable because pizza is, if you think it's like it's bread and there's tomatoes, yeah, there's like onions, yeah, catch up as a vegetable and like little things like that in order to sort of barely technically by the faintest stretch of the imagination, meet those standards and stay within

budget because schools could not afford to feed the kids the healthy food and they still can't the budget's so stra strange, which is, by the way, as a country, embarrassing that people in like, I don't know, like Bolivia probably have better school. I hate when like kids don't get their diplomas because of school lunch debt. But why is school lunch debt for poor children even a thing? Is it so much money?

They should subsidize, why don't we subsidize the good foods? All we do is subsidize corn and turn it into sugar. Same thing here. And corn is like a military asset almost because it stores for so long. It's like a strategic thing. But I agree with you, Woody. It costs pennies. Like we're spending... I can't even imagine how much we're spending on wars. A tenth of one percent of that would probably solve our school lunch problems. We don't even need to just give free lunches

to poor kids. We could just give free lunches to kids at school. We have the money. We're the richest country on earth. Surely we can afford to feed kids more than expired milk and moldy pizza. How about those fitness YouTubers who are shredded out of their mind and they're like, here's a budget way to get jacked. But one of those guys in charge, he'll find a good budget way that we can have jacked, not fat kids. And everyone's going to be in a better mood.

They're going to have more energy at school. They're going to be gassy from the protein powder from the protein. And that's just something we have to deal with. If we want to have a jacked, not fat country, all the kids are going to be like, no chicken and rice again. Yeah, but they're going to be looking down. We're going to have some fucking vascular 11 year olds. You know, they're going to be doing nothing, nothing but pull ups. We should,

that's one thing we should take. Kids will be so slow. China. Now I know it's just the propaganda videos, but how come we don't have kids doing cool drum dances in sync? China does. They're all playing Fortnite. Historically black colleges have it. They're the best. Drumline.

The drumline stuff? Yeah. Oh, I was, was it colleges or young kids that China was doing that with in the Olympics in like 2008? I always thought they were like younger kids with a different dance. I thought they were like, no, just trying to talk about where we are strong, which is those drum line competition.

Oh, yeah. College. Different kind of drums though. If you're like really fat by college though, like you're probably gonna be fat for a while. We need to hit kids early. Oh, I thought we were working on drumming talent. I'm a little.

I feel like the solution is just physical activity. Like I saw that video of a six-year-old the other day that was like 200 pounds. This little black girl. She was trying to climb the playground equipment and it was such a struggle. It looked like one of those morbidly obese people trying to get into a car and it takes them way too long. Like there's a point where they stop and catch their breath on the way in. Like yeah, also morbidly obese people getting into the car. But that's so fucked up when you see a kid that fat. It's like,

all right, someone's responsible for this. We got to shut this down. That's abuse. Yeah, it's abuse. You're making that kid. So they're going to have like a litany of health issues their entire life. That obese six yearold black girl with the titties. Yeah, narrow down the one obese kid in the country. Zach's in it. You've never been anywhere close to 200. Schools can fix like that. Zach's like six seconds.

You can make them do gym all day, but if they go home and their parents feed them an outrageous amount of unhealthy food, they're still going to be fat. Like I'm sure you're the one. I mean, you're the one wanting to get pretty lunches after I've sent them down. Yeah, maybe're still going to be fat. Like I'm sure you're the one. Generation. I'm down. Maybe maybe no lunch. Yeah, just a protein bar and a little scoop of peanut butter. Our slogan is no lunch today. I don't we skip lunch and we do a double

math day because we're not doing so hot at that either. Well, that's just a fat child. But I found a video of trying to climb some. What's AI? So I hope so. I hope so. Because the hands don't look right to you. I was going to say, this reminds me, did y'all see Maury? Maury Povich would bring out these super fat kids

and follow them through a day in their life. This is uncomfortable, man. And eat four pizzas and stuff. Poor kid. Yeah, no more, let's not gawk at the fat. It looks like a Sharpay. That's abuse. You're that big, that little, that will probably follow you for the rest of your

life. That's how it was in American development. That was not an American baby. Our baby and we will hang our hat on that. We should at least have a propaganda campaign promoting other countries, mad kids. So we look less terrible. We're number one. We have the fattest kids. No, we are no merit. Mexico is the fattest and And so get it together, Mexico. I wonder if where the high is very fat. Nauru is very fat.

Of like the real countries, I bet we're definitely the largest as far as like overall weight, because Americans just tend to be taller than Mexicans. So like it's going to be more fat on a bigger build. on a bigger build. And then those other examples of the really fat people are like little islands where it's like a bunch of people, like yeah, the Samoan islands where people just eat pork and pineapples all day. I think there's one called Nauru. I watched a YouTube video about this. Nauru is something like that.

It's this tiny little Republic literally in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. I think it's the world's smallest and most isolated Republic and they had phosphorus on their Island. So of course they let foreign companies mine it all in the 70s and 80s. They were outrageously rich. They just imported everything but had no long-term plans whatsoever for what to do with the waste or how to maintain any agriculture or local food or anything. So now the entire island is toxic. You can't grow anything. They have to import anything I think it's technically like, it's not really a real country, but

like the fattest place on earth because they mostly just import spam and like processed goods because it takes weeks to ship it over there and that's all they can eat and there's nothing to eat on the island. They have the highest rate of adult diabetes worldwide. 31% of Nauruans are diabetic with figures that are like 45% from 55. No, not 30%. What percentage of Americans are diabetic? I would guess it's like 6% or 8%. Maybe 10%. I don't know. But it says the average weight among Nauruans is 220 pounds. That's insane. That does not say that's the average male weight. That's the average weight.

So there's a lot of big folks over here. US is 11%. US is 11%. I might have a perspective coming from the deep south where like everybody and especially their grandmothers had diabetes. It says the Naruins have the very sedentary lifestyle that does not help. I don't know anyone with diabetes. My grandmother had like early onset and she like fixed it with diet, which is one of the reasons I stand on that all the time whenever somebody's getting diabetes

and they don't do something about it or when Patrice O'Neill let it let himself have his feet rot off and die or whatever he did to himself instead of stop eating fucking nonsense. It was like 350 pounds. He was tall too, right? Yeah. Patrice was like 6'4", 6'5". He was a big dude. And I've been watching those super fan edits of The Office and there's more of him in there. And I guess I never realized how big and fat he was that whole time. Because he was so tall.. And like, I guess I never realized how big and fat he was that whole time. Cause he was so tall.

I was like, I was just a big guy. And I saw him in the basketball episode. And it's, and I guess that's six years or so before he died. Yeah. He should have had a wake up call. That fucking sucks. Patrice let himself die of diabetes. He did not have to.

So he was 41. That's my song. Wow. I don't. So he was 41. Yeah, that's my so much. Wow. Leo. Oh, I don't think that he was like, oh, I have diabetes. Well, I just found out. I'll take it serious two weeks from now. I think he had it for many, many, many years and just didn't was still eating candy and shit like that.

Wonder what his problem was. Like, what was his what was it he was eating? Was it just everything all the time? I think it was sweets. I think he was a big sweets guy. Alcohol. No, he didn't drink at all. I thought he was a big drinker. No, Patrice didn't drink. And so he was a six foot four, six foot five, 400 plus pound man off of candy and treats, which it was probably a fun road to get there. But yeah, it must take a lot of candy to get there. It would, or just, yeah, it's probably the easiest way to get that fat over time. Cause you can just

shovel pasta. You can just shovel it down. I think so does the big one. Yeah. There are people who say like, like watch TV movies or video games or whatever. And they nonstop every time they empty a mountain to you, they pour another they grab another one. If I didn't drink zero sugar, like I drink so many of these a day, these zero sugar sodas like each one of them was 100 calories or 120 calories. That'd be crazy. That'd be

pounds a week that you would just Oh, yeah, I think a regular soda is like 200 calories plus. And like 40 to 50 grams of sugar, which is quite a lot when you'd like to see it out in the cubes. And there's a whole industry to pump that. These sodas cost almost nothing to make. They're ubiquitous.

I think Coca-Cola said their marketing goal was to have a soda within arm's reach of every person on the planet. And in that amount, in that quantity, it's poison. I'm of the opinion that soda companies are literally evil and they should all be put to death. And it's a blind. No, I like, I like my diet sodas. You will not take my diet Pepsi. We keep, we can keep diet. I'm not talking about getting rid of soda. I'm talking about getting rid of these companies that have pushed soda so much.

Who's making the soda? Yeah, we're not getting rid of soda, Taylor, just PepsiCo and Coca-Cola. Yeah, you're sending me back to RC? Not today. No. I don't like that. What do you hydrate with, Drifter?

Do you honestly hydrate mostly with water? I drink almost exclusively water, a little bit of milk. I might drink juice like once a week. So the reason for this is I grew up in a family where they drank soda instead of water. I was belittled for being feminine, girly, other words I can't say here at dinner because I wanted to drink water also because I didn't like ice. They wouldn't call missed that. And so everybody in my family would just drink soda instead of water. And it was normal.

A ton of people in the community were the same. And as I had health problems as a kid, probably related to this crap I got now. And I had to take diuretics for a couple of years. And the doctor said, if you take loop diuretics, you cannot drink only ginger ale. You know, that'll make you sick as hell. So I had to go hard water. And it was like the biggest change, my whole body felt healthier, better, more normal. So even after the meds were done that habit stuck and I'm like,

water only. And I don't, well, don't drink alcohol for other reasons. But it's a lemon in there at least do you like a fancy man sometimes do you like a nice sparkling water? No. Oh, I usually drink tap water, to be honest. Tap water, bottled water, regular water. That's your problem. But I just solved your problem. It's that tap water you've been drinking a

gallon of a day. It's true. You're getting too much fluoride. Oh, I guess so. Oh my God. No. Did you see that? They came out and said- I tested it myself. I was, you know what, you're right. I was so fucked up and scared about so many things. I bought a home test kit and did the home test kit. We were very normal and safe within fluoride limits. What did they say? I mostly just drink water and there's nothing wrong with that.

Oh, they're saying- Tap water makes you gay? You know, they did put chemicals in the water to make the frogs gay. Yeah, the US Department of Health and Human Services says that fluoridated drinking water can lead to a two to five point IQ drop in children when it's at too high of a level. I never had. It has the double the recommended amount.

We had a well. You had a well, so you probably didn't get any. My entire life, my entire childhood anyway, had a well. When it would rain though, the water't get any. My entire life, my entire childhood anyway, had a well. When it would rain though, the water would get muddy. So that when it would like come like a really big like rainstorm, like the shower would run red.

Cause it's like the red clay in Georgia. It's like, oh. It's like animal style. No, I mean, it's covered up and everything. It's just like something would happen with the underground water table where it would get muddy. I mean, there must be a little dead chicken in there, right? Like, oh,

there's so far from the dead chickens. Like that's a concern. That's a concern. Like there's wells over there near the dozens of feet away, thousands of yards away. Like, like, like we would never go near the like, like there's a well over there near where the chickens have been buried. And I'm like, that's a car washing well. That is not a people drinking well. The salmonella well. How thirsty are you? Oh, salmonella would be a blessing compared to whatever's down in the river.

Evil would just, yeah, just be rotting. They dig a big deep hole as deep as a backhoe will reach into the ground. And then it's made to size because there's a concrete cap that you move from one to the other every time you fill one up and it's got holes in it. And you open that hole and there's just evil down there because there's thousands of pounds of rotting chickens. Do you fill it with something like concrete or... Chickens, Taylor.

Just chickens. Just fill it with chickens. Just fill it with chickens. Every day I get it, Taylor. Just fill in the cracks with more, with Taylor. Just chickens. No, every day. The cracks with more with emulsified chickens. Look, they melt like they're in a hot environment. They melt in like 24 hours or

something. And the bacteria is so high down there. When you look down there, it's just swarming maggots and black rotten flesh. And the most putrid thing you can imagine. It smells. I'm glad you don't use that well.

I think it's like the end of the movie. You don't use that well. Kyle, do you ever watch the end? You, of all people, maybe watch the movie Phenomena? John Travolta. He has, let's just say he has mental powers. Some of the movies. No, no, no, no, no.

The horror movie from the 80s starring God, it was an American actress directed by Mario Bravo or somebody. At the end of the movie, they filled an entire swimming pool full of real maggots and threw a 12 year old girl into it for real. And it was fucking awful. And the rest of the movie was like a PG-13 kids adventure. And then in the last minute, a real life maggot pool, they push her in. You know, at the end of Poltergeist when the skeletons are coming out of the ground those are real dead people real human skeletons that the actress is like in that water with because it was cheaper to buy cadavers than to have special effects make fake scale really look real and if you watch that scene it's what it is there's a pool that's been dug and they haven't like finished it it's just a big hole in the ground in their

backyard and she falls into it you know it's got that slant in the pool but now it's mud it's a rainstorm so she's clawing her way trying not to fall into the water that's collected it's like chest deep and when she finally falls in the water the bodies start coming up out of the water like all like rotten and shit and those are real fucking bodies. Oh, Texas chainsaw did a similar thing. And if you want to tie it all together, you can watch poultry guys than equally disgusting movie. Is that like a godfather? That's a real horse's head. It's a, it's trauma film. What's a trauma? It's like trauma.

It's like a really schlocky B grade sort of thing. Like it's it's basically gross for the sake of being gross. Like there's like a scene where like a fat guy, a super fat guy eats a possessed chicken and he's so fat that he tries to digest the ghost, but he can't. So he gets the shits and goes to the bathroom and is shitting while he's finishing his chicken meal and then shits out a skinnier version of himself and like walks away from the fat suit. It's an insane movie. I love it. Great. When you're on Delta eight, that's a sounds troubling. I don't know if I would. I don't know if I would enjoy that. It's like a dirty comedy.

Yeah. The story rebirth like a splatter comedy probably would be the right way to look at it. Yeah, it's wild. I don't know if you saw Thanksgiving, that last Eli Roth movie where... So good. I like that. I thought that was pretty fucking good. That's what he should make. Like, he shouldn't make anything else other than movies like that. That's what he's good at. Did he do Borderlands, the colossal failure that is Borderlands, I think he directed? I think that... So I think the way the schedule went went he made borderlands like four years ago And it has sat on the shelf for some reason and so he went after that. He made thanksgiving, which was good It had it's already come out been in theaters been on, you know rental or whatever been on the dvd

And and and only now does borderlands come out and maybe you didn't notice it taylor Uh, but it's one of the worst reviewed movies of all time. It's had zero percent for a long time. I don't know, I watched some reviews of it. I'm not gonna watch that shit, but they did that thing where they take a beloved video game title that has a good story and interesting characters. And then it was like, nah, let's just imagine as you was like 60 years old instead of 20.

How about that? Oh, okay. You know, it's just imagine as you like 60 years old instead of 20. How about that? Oh, okay. You know, it's what's her name? Who's the actress that they've got? Jamie Lee Curtis also in everything everywhere all at once. Jamie Lee Curtis is way too fucking old. She looks like she plays old lady lady. But Galadriel.

What's her name? Blanchett. Kate Blanchett is in there playing like the spunky like go get her girl, the redhead from the probably too old for that. Wait, the redhead from the game is like, I always imagine they were all young people except for like gray haired older guy like the berserk character because I played the games and they Borderlands lost so much goodwill among its fans for like the last two games they released.

Like they were like, if I were on the internal team of the most recent Borderlands game they released, I would have been like, we can't release this guys. We're going to destroy our reputation. Like the last remaining bit of people who like Borderlands are hating it. I played through the first and the second Borderlands multiple times each because it's just a fun game and it's really good. The third one and then that like half-assed bullshit like a third of a fourth game they released and charged like half of a full game price for. It's terrible. Like I would rather someone not play Borderlands at all than experience Borderlands as that third or that fourth version.

Because the first one, the second one in particular is awesome. I don't know if you've played Borderlands Drifter, but the second one is so much fun. It's just a fun fucking game. I haven't personally played it. I've watched a little gameplay. Looks like it's sort of like Fallout with a more upbeat attitude. Yeah, it's just kind of like the random nature of the guns makes it fun because you can stumble upon something that like randomly happens to be insanely good and it's it's just fun oh this one shoots every bullets at 10 bombs or whatever

it's got a pithy little descriptor to it and a fun name like it's there was some gun that shot other guns there i think there was the one that just like a replicates a new gun. Like when you're done, you throw the gun, yes. And another one like material, every brand of gun had like a different specialty. So like the Jacobs guns were supposed to be like the wheel and like wheel guns. So like they could, they didn't have a fire limit. They want to be as fast as you can pull. And then TD or was the brand where like every time you reload,

you throw the gun at your opponent and it blows up and you just have a new gun. That's exactly the same. It was a lot of fun. That was such a fun game. They also replaced the actor that does clap trap. You know, I guess that the little robot, the little key with the voice actor with Jack Black.

They made it. Yeah, they made it Jack Black. Oh, they shouldn't have done that. He's kind of has an iconic voice in that game series. Yeah. It was made by Gearbox. So Gearbox is kind of infamous for this. They have Borderlands.

It's like a fan favorite. They tried Duke Nukem. That was a huge fail. They did Aliens, Colonial Marines. It was a huge fail. Battleborn didn't last very long. Homeland, I think Homeworld or whatever also didn't last very long.

And I feel bad because they're a local Texas company. I could, maybe after a very long day, walk from my house to the Gearbox Studios. And I would want to support them and say, yeah, it's awesome, we're making games here in Dallas. But they just can't seem to get their shit together. And Taylor, I agree with you. On the stuff they release, you would

think that those would tank the studio, yet somehow it doesn't. I think they're partially under a subsidiary of Bethesda in some capacity. No, ID software. So they get bailed out a little bit here and there. But you helped me catch up. What are we talking about? The Borderlands movie is talking about how what a big failure it was and neither of them have really played it.

Actually Kyle's only experience on Borderlands was like a few minutes in the worst possible like the most recent. No, no, I think he finished a bad one. Yeah. We played it. Oh, then you. I was the Borderlands fan and I guess I had seen the series get a little worse, but I had hopes that somehow this would be a U shaped curve.

It was not. It was just a downward trajectory and Kyle kindly suffered through the whole thing. We played that whole game that the, they called it like the prequel or something. It was the pre sequel or something. Oh, I can't wait. Good part. Cause it was those games. Like, like if you've been listening to us 10 or 12 years, like Woody love that game and he tells stories of it and how wonderful it is to play it.

And I was like, I'm going to do this borderlands thing with Woody. This is going to be great. This is like going swimming with Woody or going life garden with Woody. It was Borderlands thing with Woody. This is gonna be great. This is like going swimming with Woody or going lifeguarding with Woody. It was bad. Or like, you're gonna live care with Woody. You did it to me too. You did it to me. It's a great game.

Kyle loved Dead Space. Dead Space was his jam. And then we're like, I'm gonna play Dead Space 3 with Kyle. I'm gonna get the Dead Space experience with Kyle. It was sucks. Like not only does the third one like shit here. I watched a 45 minute documentary about why it's so shitty about them

going in this different direction and trying to copy other games and abandoning what had made them great in the past and all these terrible decisions narrative wise and gameplay wise. Like the whole thing, the whole idea of co-op is, is counter to what Dead Space is about. This one guy on his own against terrible odds in a very scary atmospheric environment. For that to like prosper and like do its thing to you mentally, you can't be chuckling with Woody about, about like, look at his limbs, look at it's wiggling, look at it, look at his leg wiggles when I play those first two games

By myself I was a first especially the first one. I was so scared I was so scared in that dark room playing that scary fucking game That that it worked for me, and it's just a better game, but the third one Yeah, same exact thing and I remember getting stuck on this I remember where I was in real life sitting playing that game because it was so shitty There's a part in Dead Space 3 Where you have to like jump from one spacecraft to the other and you literally like glide you like fly through space itself Through a debris field and I could not avoid the debris. No, I I'm not I never claimed to be like some pro gamer

But I didn't struggle with that part of the game. And I still wonder like- You get it every time. Yeah. I die and we go back and then I'll try. And I just remember there was like a little music, it's like, dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun.

Didn't that one have microtransactions? I want to say there was like a pre-order bonus where you could just start out Dead Space 3 with like this giant rocket launcher Which completely annihilates any sense of fear or dreads armor stuff you could buy and you've ruined Yeah, yeah armor immediately ruined the game. But yeah, I couldn't fly it fly through the thing either I was doing something wrong or I'm just retarded I kept hitting debris and in that game when you die, they let you see it

They let you see your body like come apart and grew some awful ways. There are there a lot of them are pre rendered, but there's multiple of them where you'll get like your tentacles will rush down your mouth until your belly explodes like like your head will pop in weird disgusting ways. But I just kept hitting fucking shit in space and dying. Sure. And I wanted to just watch important so bad. I wanted to quit so bad. We were recording. This was a YouTube video. That was it was a series we were doing. We were doing a series, and I'm thinking like, God, there's gotta be like eight, nine more hours of this shit to go after this.

I think we uploaded like a, I uploaded like a three-hour long finale. Like, all right, guys, I don't wanna make you suffer with 96 more episodes of Dead Space. Here's a three-hour episode. It turned out to be a bad game, and I don't think either of us liked it but we were committed and we had to finish it. Woody got me on Borderlands to start many years ago and that was when 1 and 2 were the only ones out and so I was like oh damn Woody knows his games. This is a blast. This is so fun and I I was all in on Borderlands. And then when they released that third one, they lost you. What? Just what a middle finger to their fan base where they're like, Hey,

you know those things you liked about the other game? Well, we're putting in more of the frustrating humor and less of those pesky missions and guns. And it's like, no, I'll suffer through your ham handed writing and character building. Just keep the random guns and the unique fun 20 armed beasts coming. Like that's what's playing Elden Ring right now. I can't believe how good this game is. I feel like I'm sometimes I feel lucky that I have like my copy.

Like for sixty dollars, I get to keep this. I can't believe they made it. It's all to be really sixty dollars. Those fools. And I'm up against the biggest hardest boss Right now her name is millennia. I think it's something I'm bad with for Laney. Yeah, I know they made her into a boss pepperoni nipples no, well, dude her armor is half a bra and I think that's it. What is she like a demon or something? She's smoking hot.

She's a gorgeous redhead with a prosthetic arm and a prosthetic leg. Oh, true. I love it, GT Redhead. No. She's a sword, sword stress? What do you call a female sword? I don't know, but.

Sword woman. Sword woman, okay. She's very difficult. Her sword is much longer than yours. She moves way faster than you do. She hits way harder than you do. She does things that don't, they can't be done. The waterfowl dance or ducky dance, if you will.

And I've tried her like 40 times so far. I haven't beaten her yet. You'll get them. Yeah, that's, oh, no, no, no. Show the second half of her where she takes all their clothes off. That's that's. Oh, so if you beat her ass like this,

then it's like one of those phases. She pretends to die. And then it's like. Oh, you beat her clothes off. I like that. Yeah, she does. She's on the ground like in this, you know, like sexy position or whatever.

And you think you won, your character starts to walk away and she goes, wait. And then she starts rising from the dead in this giant thing. Yeah, that's what she looks like. And she's very hard to beat. So the best player on earth is this guy named Let Me Solo Her. And in this game, you can call a

cooperator and help you beat the thing like a real life person for the boss fights. But I don't want to do that. I want to beat her. I don't want to like stand in the corner while let me solo her does it for me. But yeah, he took 240 tries the first time you beat her. And now he's like the best on the planet. He's a specialist. Are you counting your tries?

No, I just estimate. Cause it takes about five minutes for me to try. Like it's about five minutes per loss. So I'm just like 60 minutes. All right. That's like 12 tries. What's the reset like? Like, like, let's say you die. How long before you can get back in there and get after it again?

In this boss, it's not bad at all. I bet it's like 15 seconds. Oh, that's crazy fast. That's the shortest refractory period I've ever heard of. There are other bosses where it's dreadful. There's, there's a dog and you don't even get a big reward for it, but he has nine smaller dogs who you really should beat. Because while your focus is on the big one, that pack will maul you. And they're not even hard. But you have to kill the nine dogs. And while you do that, you attract the attention of two ogres. They're a little harder to beat, but they're not a problem. Now you need to kill the nine dogs and the two ogres before you even try the big dog with the fucking sword in his mouth or whatever it is. And I've seen a character that's a cool character that the wolf with the sword in the mouth. Yeah, one of the game but anyway, so it takes like 15 minutes to try this dog.

And the way his movements are he gets to control the engagement like he jumps at you and then he can jump 70 feet away. Meanwhile, I'm like with the sword trying to chase him down. And it feels like you lose to bullshit because he like jumps up in the air, lands on you, you one hit die, and you're like, a waste that was. Exactly. Now to do it again, it's this long tedious process that you know you can do, but you have to endure before you try it again. So this is a fun boss, a reengage. Being able to get right back after it is so key to a difficult game like that.

I think of the speed runners who do those Mario worlds that are hand-built to be nightmare scenarios and sometimes They'll be the part they're failing it It's like four or five minutes of hard shit in they've got to hit some two-frame move or whatever and it's like man It's such you got to climb all the way back up to the top of the mountain to fight the bad guy again Every time it's hard or even in like Tarkov where let's say you're trying to kill the goons to get a task where you're trying to kill a specific boss finding them is the problem like like oh yes they might the spawn rate for that boss on that map might be like one in ten so that means you're

gonna have to play ten raids to see him once maybe but who's to say you find him while you're there and someone else doesn't kill him first or god forbid he kills you and to add to that you could be in three different places. So now you have to drag your Vulnerable, but all around the mat checking three different spots for where he might be No, it not even knowing if he's there. It's rough. It's fucking there's a Achievement in Tarkov for killing the boss of interchange kill it 100 times You get like his cool tracksuit on your character to wear all the time. It's got like like it's like a gold Bracelet bracelet and some other it's a cool thing to have and when you see a dead guy with those with that gear on you're Like oh he did the thing. Yeah, or a streamer

So the bracelets key because it's in your point of view all the time Like I can't tell what your pants look like, but I can tell what your wrist looks like. Because if you see a streamer with that bracelet, that guy's probably good. Did any of you guys try Delta Force Hawk Ops? It had a super good extraction mode. It was like not as fully fleshed out as Tarkov, but I was thoroughly impressed with how good the extraction mode was. And I usually don't even like extraction shooters, to be honest with you. It looks pretty good. It reminds me of Call of Duty graphics in some ways. I've been watching it. Yeah. Battlefield a little bit. Well, there's another mode,

right? That is almost like battlefield coffee. Yeah, it's better than that. It's they shamelessly stole it from Battlefield Chinese studio. They don't give a damn about stuff like that. It's Battlefield, but maybe done better. I had more fun playing Douglas Hawk Ops than I did playing Battlefield. And to review the game for YouTube, which is still a thing that I do in this stupid condition, I was like, I'll just play the extraction mode.

Extraction shooters are boring. They put me to sleep. I like dumb, like, you know, shoot and scoot kind of games. I found myself deeply engrossed with their extraction mode with a big map to explore You have real enemies and AI enemies. You can't always tell the difference. There's like a stealth component There's all this interesting stuff to loot and escape. I was really happy with Delta Force Hawk off It looks good never have been watching extraction mode like that

I've been watching videos of it and also arena breakout the other Chinese like shameless copy that of Tarkov People have called it like Tarkov for dads because it's you can just buy your you use real money and kind of paid it I say pay to win cuz that's that's how you attack something but it's kind of pay to prosper It might be a better way to put it like like no grinding prosperity preacher Yeah, like get in there and like ah, but I want the good ammo. Why don't you give me $5? You know, I think they're gonna. The price is reasonable or are they cursed?

I, so all I know is that, so there's a secure container in extracting shooters that storage area where even if you die, you get to keep these belongings. That's kind of a mainstay. And you have to pay real money for that. And it's a monthly fee Depending on what size container you want and it's a couple dollars. I think it's five dollars for like that's entirely reasonable

That's like a subscription service for the game The thing the reason I agree with you is like Alright, if you're going to play arena breakout for the next five years and pay every month for five years That's not a good pricing model for you. You'd want the Tarkov pricing model where you give them $150 and one lump sum and they got you mostly. But if you're going to play against game for two months, it's $10 fucking dollars and you're

playing a triple A feeling title to me that's really well polished. It runs so much better than Tarkov. But I've gone back to play like single-player Tarkov That's what I'm doing right now, and I don't even see it's it's not an extraction shooter exactly because there's no people There's no players. I just think of it as like a Like I'm a Navy SEAL Sneaky so calm guy like going around with my night vision fighting the real it's really hard AI like it's really hard I yeah, I've got a high KD

But it's I die a lot. I thought you play with friends. Yeah, Larry's gonna hop on with me tonight Oh, so you're still getting a social experience. You just not play against humans No, I've been playing 100% solo up until now, but but Larry he said he's been listening to show He's like, okay. I want to play and you keep talking about the show now. I'll play Okay, he's a hot bomb play with me some night, but I like I just like not getting cheated I hate getting cheated so much and and not only that like I hate to like I don't like campers like like like in Tarkov It's different like if you don't know that game like it's it's really scummy behavior. It genuinely is and it's They'll be there for 30 40 minutes of their life their real life

They're sitting there reading a book in the real world or watching tik-tok And then they hear me come and just ruin my experience when I've been trying to have fun. It's it's a real Shitty thing to have in a game. They've actually changed that that's that's one of the changes with this new patch They just wiped in Tarkov the new boss partisan I think he's on all of the maps and he specifically goes after players with bad player karma and you get bad player karma by sitting still for too long. So clean was cleans the streamer. He, I think it was him.

He was playing Tarkov. He had to pee. He hides in a bush. He goes to the bathroom and before he can come back, the boss has come and got him. That's my bush. That's I think Cod did something with that. Like if you stood still, ghost stop working maybe. Yeah, ghosts would stop working the head Krampus. The finals more recently they have an alien and no they have a orbital bombardment but it only drops missiles on you if you stop moving. So that's kind of fun. I wonder how you guys don't play. You guys probably don't play like cracked out shooters.

No Splitgate fans here. I played wait, Splitgate, the one that's like Halo and Portal mixed. Yeah, Splitgate 2 is an alpha right now. It's been fun as crap. I've kind of actually hurt my hands a little bit playing that more than I should have. Yeah, we don't play much fast. Like go, go, go like Call Call of Duty the idea of Call of Duty Which was all of our jams so long ago

I said think all our God creators that rinse and repeat sort of go go go and like get as many kills as you can Like I'm over it like they don't the death still like that hurt go go go gas I like I don't like the speed. I just don't like the nature of the first-person shooter where that's the only game I play regularly is a fast go-go-go game. You play is RTS. Yeah RTS. You're always doing something. Yeah Yeah, you're hurting camels eight age of empires to oh, that's a that's a fantastic game Yes, it is beautifully amazingly who of it can be very high a p.m. On top of all that very high a p.m amazingly. It can be very high APM on top of all that. Very high APM. Now, while these two are being... This is the thing, Kyle is more of an FPS level gamer when it comes to APM.

And so he gets a little intimidated by RTSs. And that's all right. Each their own. Some of us are true gamer men and some of us are little baby boys. Yeah, I agree. Run away from the screen when it's time for ads. So this episode of PGA is brought to you. It's good to play a wide variety of games. Yeah, I agree away from the screen when it's time for ads. So This episode of you play a wide variety of games. Yeah, I agree Real quick. We're gonna hear from some wonderful sponsors Bluechew this episode is sponsored by blue chew. Let's talk about sex guys. Shouldn't you always be at your best?

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It's remember early in the JRE, the advertised flashlights, if we could get to that level, we'd be dope. That would be great. I think I think it's like not a flashlight, but the big. Have you seen the big jerk off machines that you auto blow to we are maybe something like the auto blow, we were sponsored by the auto blow a long while ago. Many, many, probably almost 10 years ago. A little bit.

They gave us the devices, but never any money, if I recall. The device was so fucking loud. It's a way to establish masturbatory dominance in the home, right? No one will walk into that room, not knowing what's going on. Like, you know, when you're sitting on like a,

on an airplane before it's taken off but the ambient noise is so loud just that's what it's like masturbating with an autobloat. It's like it's ying ying ying ying. It probably has like a little engine or something in there. Just do it again Taylor just the sound is getting me aroused again. It's a Pavlonian response. I'm getting hard. It's so fucking loud, Drifter. There's no way for you to not know that a robot is on your dick right now. I would know for other reasons, but I mean, so if I were to... The sound is distinct. So if I'm in a college dorm or something and I walk by and I hear that and I'm like, oh,

that guy's auto blowing in there. 100%. If you tried to do that, you go in the bathroom at your dorm and you start auto blowing your roommates out there going, I know what he's doing because I can hear it over the TV. Yeah, not a good, I straight up had sex while my roommate was in the room because he was such an asshole. I just didn't give a fuck about what his opinions were. Well, did you give him a chance to leave? Uh, no. Well, you know, that's on him because he should have been able to read the room

and be like, that is, that is a, that's just a rude person, frankly. If you see your roommate is about to get laid, give, give him a little space. Give him a little, little room. You know, I would have just started not done that, but he was such an ass. Or two. Actually, yeah, you just start jacking off. You said, I'm here for the fun. You know, take your top off, Drifter. Yeah, I like to do that. So the quarter jack off. If it's not going the way I like it, I'll boo.

I've got an ass ball. Whoa. Seriously, I want you. I will ask you. I will ask you. You never jerk off. Whoa. Seriously. I wonder if you're a medical girl. Peanuts are in the back of your head. Throwing Jacker Jacks at you. Never talk.

Tomatoes. What if he was jerking off while me and my wife were going at it? I don't even know. I think that if, that he would at least have to ask you permission for that. He can't just assume you'd be down. That's three-way. Yeah. I don't know. He's be down. That's three way. Yeah. He's rolling around in the bed,

being all grumpy, saying things, telling us to be quiet, whatever. Never ignore that guy. Nice and awkward. Nice and uncomfortable. We didn't get along at all. It was really bad. Cause what would happen is like he had ROTC

at like five in the morning. So five in the morning, all the lights in the room come on, TV turns on, Star Trek, Next Generation at like 80% volume, Coffee Grinder. You know, and I'm like a guy who has classes at noon. This was every day. I would be like playing,

this was like the Halo 3 era, right? Like before, just before Machinima, and I'd be like playing or trying to record something with my little EasyCap, and he would just be irritated and turn on the TV and crank the volume to maximum to blow out my game, or just all sorts of little things like that. So at a point, I just had to sort of like completely ignore him and live my life the way I was going to live it if he was there or not. And so you got to do with a shitty roommate.

Did he have a girlfriend? No. Nice. Very, very, very no. I did as a test. So the dude hated me for a lot of reasons that we've discussed here. And I had a friend that was a very hot girl,

standard blonde, skinny, bombshell kind of thing. And I asked her to come to the room with me with two other girls. And we had some bet that I bet that she could get him talking and friendly and flirty and seconds and Yeah, that basically is what happened like he sort of ignored me and only talked to the girls and was immediately like trying to get a date and try to hit on him and try to do a thing and show off as like ROTC stuff and

Is that a flex Hey ladies, check out this weird band leader helmet I have to wear with the chins. I think so. I think dude came from a very military family So I think he probably thought it was a flex. I don't think it's like embarrassing but I think it's cool either like you know, I mean, I don't think it's a flex I Thought ROTC was cool, but I don't think it's cool either. You know what I mean? I don't think it's a flex. I thought ROTC was cool, but I don't know much about it. It was never on my campus. As far as I could tell, they just spin those fake rifles

and make their beds well or some shit. I don't know what the big deal is. Maybe you're getting some brownie points if you join the actual military. Yeah, you were on the fast track for leadership. Because I met the dude's parents who also hated me for good reasons. And they were like, Okay, so like, I first met the parents, okay, on move in day.

And they're like trying to get to know me and where your parents like, you know, there was, I think I asked them where they're from. And they're like, Oh, you know, we move around a lot. We don't stay in one place. I'm like, Oh, you know, me too around a lot. We don't stay in one place. I'm like, oh, you know, me too. We have that in common like military family. And they're all happy. And I was like, no.

And then, well, why did you move? Because my family was criminal and we wanted to avoid warrants. And then it was just immediate downhill. You know, I thought they would kind of take that sort of cute, smart ass re humor as a joke, but it was a very sort of conservative traditional family. And they were like, who the fuck is my son staying with? Who is this weird guy in this room? Um, so it was like your parents, tell me more about that.

Uh, let's see. It was primarily on my mom's side. Uh, grandfather. We'll, we'll work chronologically, uh, more recently, like mom's side of the family, a lot of like drugs, cocaine, smuggling, selling, trading, small time gangster stuff. Mom and stepdad and uncle grew a shit ton of pot. We had like a big weed field in the 90s or early 2000s in Kentucky, which is why we had to leave the state.

All sorts of minor insurance fraud, bad checks, standard get drunk and try to stab the guy on the border with a fork, that kind of stuff. Sure, sure. Little bit of grand theft auto. My mom got tied up in the mob for a little bit. There was, this is not a criminal behavior. Trafficking, unfortunately, was involved. Go back to my grandfather.

Things get fucking insane. Actually relates to the medical condition, I think it might be slightly possibly genetic and the thiamine deficiency, because when he would drink, he would go full psychotic, like full break from reality. And in prison, they evaluated him said he had a pretty high IQ and was friendly and affable. But whenever he could get his hands on alcohol, it was just like, there's no telling what would happen. So that guy was, I don't know,

his kill count was probably under 20, but he did kill people that owed him money, a lot of rapes, a lot of drug trafficking, a lot of like high-end theft and heist and stuff like that. So example, my mom grew up, her toys for children, this is what she told me, I know the PKA audience says I'm a lying piece of shit and all that stuff.

My mom told me her toys were different caliber bullet casings and she gave different names with each one. So instead of doing tea party with bunnies, it would be 45 and 30 ought six and stuff like that. And going back further than that, even more criminal, more violent stuff that I would probably say is an uncomfortable topic here. Just completely wild. Families getting less criminal as we successive generations. Not all the way done yet though, right?

No, right? I've committed a lot of crimes in my life. Yeah, you never get out. You never get out. What's your taste? So I didn't tell the roommates family any of that stuff, but I just mentioned like, oh, we had to move because of criminality. And you think about the guy who's like this upstanding like military, like higher ranking dude and you say, oh, we moved for criminality. That's not an okay thing. That's not a good, that doesn't, you know, mesh.

But mom's side of the family, extraordinarily criminal, at least in a minor capacity, very few flavors of crime they haven't tried. Probably the worst of them all was human trafficking, but they didn't do too much of that. Like just- Just a touch. Just a touch.

So the human trafficking is synonymous with pimping, no? Yes? Yes. Yeah, okay. Yes. I mean, sort of, but I imagine you're bringing the person from one place to the other for, you know, for criminal reasons is what trafficking means to me. It's more about the transportation for immoral reasons than than the... That's what it means to me too, but I feel like legally it's just being a pimp nowadays. I might be wrong. Yeah, I don't think so. That would be neat to do.

I don't think, I was charged with trafficking. I don't think this part is my story to tell, but I'm gonna put it in the chat so you guys can see. Here, human trafficking, also known as trafficking in persons is a crime that involves forcing or coercing someone to provide labor or services or to commit in commercial sex acts. Okay. Maybe it's not about the transportation when it's human trafficking. Maybe it just means taking advantage of them and forcing them to do things because when I hear drug

trafficking, to me, it's all about getting it from this place to that place. I thought human trafficking meant like kidnapping people. This is the plot of Taken, right? Kidnapping people, you put them in chains, you put them in like little outhouses and you force them to have sex to people who I guess like having sex with women who really wish they weren't having sex with you.

Ah, you drug them, then they're good. That's what I thought it was, but it turns out it's just pimping. Damn. Maybe it's just pimpin'. Damn. Maybe it's a racist crime that they invented to go after black peps. Are you talking about Andrew Tate? No.

No, he did. Actually, Drifter's family history we were talking about. Yeah, Drifter. I'm putting this in the comments. I'd prefer this not to be on the show. So you guys can see. Drifter's a real AJ Soprano over here. No, no. You're thinking big. this not to be on the show. So you guys. This is a real AJ Soprano over here.

No, no. You're thinking big. Think like stupid, redneck, poor, desperate, like Trailer Park Boys kind of shit. He's a real Duke brother. Dude, Trailer Park Boys, unlike any other comedy show, instills me with such a sense of like sadness, dread and hopeless. Like the intro itself, like it, I almost always hit skip intro. If I'm watching it on the service like that, because the song plus the,

the tinny incorrect color palette, it's just gray and it's, it's so sad. Yellowish. And their goals are so laughable where it's like, you know, Julian, we got to get $4,000 to retire. And it's like, really? Like four grand is their big, like Project 35 is like, they're going to make 25 grand and then we're all smooth sailing the rest of our lives. We're going to steal the gumball machine with all the pennies in it. Or they'll like ask Ricky for some money. He's like, who do you think I am? I don't have just like five dollars laying around.

Who has that kind of money? It's so real. The most intelligent member of their crew is the guy who like took me until season two for me to realize he wasn't a retard. Yeah, yes. But they wrote it. Look, they wrote him and he acted like he was retarded for many seasons, in my opinion. And, they wrote him and he acted like he was retarded for

many seasons in my opinion. And at some point the actor was like, I don't want to be the retarded guy. I want to have a thing every now and then. I don't always want to be the butt of the joke. Maybe I have some business ideas. They ruined him. My kiddies could get their own little adventure land. And so they made him more quirky and actually more sensible. I liked him as more retarded. I did too where they have- Be generous, I would say. Ah! With his eyes. Yeah.

It was pretty rough. I love the trailer part. Everything that they do, their schemes, the way it works, the piss jugs, the culture, that is very, I know it was filmed in Canada, that was so accurate to the American South growing up. It was so much like where I lived and where my wife lived. Like every episode

would hit home in some small way, like the scheme to steal half a pack of cigarettes and stuff. And you know, you get paid this week and it's your daughter's birthday. What do you do? Spend all the money instantly. I couldn't tell you how many times I've seen that in real life. Yeah. Just can't buy real. I don't know. I didn't like the sad bits of it. I like, I appreciate those the most. The saddest moment in all trailer park, boys, I don't know. I didn't like the sad bits of it. I like, I appreciate those the most, the saddest moment in all of trailer park boys, I'm gonna tell you right now, Ricky's father just has paid off

a 30 year mortgage on a trailer. And it's all free and clear now because he's defrauding the state of Canada, pretending like he's in a wheelchair and getting benefits. And he's so happy. And Ricky burns the fucking trailer, not to the ground, cause that would have been better. At least there'd not been a mess.

He like burns all the walls and the roof off and then all the interior is just blackened beyond use. And he does it by cooking French fries and getting laid and like abandoning it like French fries, cooking on the stove. So the next day we're coming to terms with the fact that the house is gone now. And we were all already homeless, the gang or whatever. But now like we don't even know

anybody who's got a house. So they're all so they're having breakfast in the wreckage. They're outside on like a hot plate and bubble shows up late to breakfast and he's like, you can smell bacon and like like like bacon sandwiches and bread or something like that he's like oh you got any more or that bacon he's like sorry bubs this is for the old man you can uh there's a bread heel there the bread heel of course is the bad piece of bread on the end of a loaf of bread he's like you could sop up some of that bacon grease here though with that bread heel you You know, that's pretty. He goes and bubbles acts like he doesn't know how he's like like this.

Like he doesn't, he doesn't know if he's being pranked or not. He's like, this is how I do it. And then I eat this and he's like, and he goes, Hmm. He's making this goofy, like, like this is fucking disgusting. Bubbles of I could drink. He asked him to drink and Ricky, Ricky hands him a melted two liter bottle that's that's got some liquid in the bottle. And he's like drinking out of this old melted bottle.

It's all contorted and twisted in a weird shape. And he's and he's eaten his bread heels that he's stopped up bacon grease with in the wreckage or just outside of this home and every still smoking. It's so depressing because I thought it was hilarious. I've lived that life so like getting a perspective on it. Fucking hilarious. Like the Bible salesman episode. You too can enter the kingdom of heaven with this here Bible for only eight easy payments of 99.99. Yeah. And all the like the stupid ideas that like Ricky would have of what an intellectual would do. Or he's like,

not to get him a fucking encyclopedics set for $700. And it's like, no, the little girl wants the world Almanac. But it wouldn't, it wouldn't even be the whole thing. It would be like missing some of the letters of the alphabet and stuff. They're just, uh, you couldn't get the whole set. Couldn't, couldn't be the whole thing. It would be like missing some of the letters of the alphabet and stuff. They're just a, you couldn't get the whole set. Couldn't afford the whole set. Do you remember that? Like when did that end?

Okay, for those of you who aren't fucking too old. You had a couple of them at my house. No, no, no, no, no. We had encyclopedias, but what I'm saying is that when I was growing up, for some reason at the grocery store they sold encyclopedias there and you had to like sign up and they'd send you like, you could buy an set of encyclopedias. and you had to like sign up and they'd send you like You could buy an asset of encyclopedias

And I remember there was some idea or at least they offered to like buy you a book at a time Sell you a book at a time. It's like what I'm gonna do with our Think it was the same on shipping maybe I'm not sure but my family did that But it all got wiped out by like encyclopedia Britannica CDs Yeah, splitting it in 26 packages cannot be a better shipping scenario than just one big one But yeah, I remember my family did that but it all got wiped out by like encyclopedia britannica cds Yeah splitting it in 26 packages cannot be a better shipping scenario than just one big one But I mean, but would you rather ship? You're right. It's still got to be cheaper to ship like 100 pound package, right?

I mean they were making you pay for shipping anyway, so They don't care. This was before amazon. Of course. Yeah. nobody has encyclopedias anymore unless they're like collectors items i would imagine like i have that uh that encyclopedia of sorts the the phrenology book i send you guys screenshots of dude he sends us these pictures from the pages of his phrenology guide and it'll be like an untrustworthy nose and it's a Jewish man. That sounds like a real book. I bought this for like $60. It's like a really old book. It's really old. Okay. Something like that is actually awesome.

I love collecting old books, old like interesting books, like old encyclopedias from the 30s and stuff that have all these crazy articles. Love those. Also like to collect comic books But that's a little bit less niche Yeah, I don't I don't have no love of comics. I kind of wish I did but growing up I didn't know they existed it is called Voughts practical character reader look at that and it is a

Amount newly printed. This is a newly printed version, but it's by LA Vought, circa 1859. Who is this? Founder of Vought Industries. It's from, and so it's full of incredible gems that teach you how to interpret the complex world that we inhabit. You have any examples of such? I think we're about to see a good one here. I'm hoping he has some dog years now.

Can you make Taylor full determine? An unreliable mother. A genuine father. It's like he ripped off the back of her head and put it on his. Hmm. He's got like a ball. It's not just bald in the back. He's got like a lump back there. Is it about like a ball. It's not just balled in the back. He's got like

a lump back there. Is it about like a tumor? It's about that dip in the bowl. Yeah. Yep. Because it would indicate like a mental disorder probably. Yeah. See. And what he says about this is about the unreliable mother. This is a striking illustration. It will pay all to remember this head formation and especially all men who would select wives who will make good mothers Slavenliness why is one slovenly because his faculties of idea ideally Ideality it's even like fuzzy in the book ideology order self-esteem and Approbativeness are weak

Positively nothing more true another kind of crying. These are selfish. there are selfish children who seem to cry but do not man this is just insane selfish children who want to cry but don't seem to cry I think I love the way they describe these old like diseases like you could have tumors or what is that person just like the people from the freak show that have the pointy heads because it's a birth defect. The Zika virus head. Yeah. This says social idiocy. One may be strong intellectually and socially idiotic as distinctly represented by this head and face. I'm feeling really called out by that. You know, when you call someone a pinhead, I think that that's what you're referring to I think they're referring to that genetic like

Retarded people head shape thing where there are Just like the social weird Actually that does play into his points that often the thinker is a social retard Which you know, I mean gonna get, you're gonna get something right when you're making this. I went to engineering school, that's absolutely true. And look at this scary guy, and he put bold in his skull so we know. Fix this outline of head and face in your mind, because it shows a peak degree of all good qualities. Wow. That's what a good person looks like? It's pointy ears.

No, no, no. A weak degree of all good qualities. He's saying, that's a bad guy. You gotta keep an eye on it. It looks a little like Mussolini if we're being honest though, right? It looks like the picture. What did we learn about Mussolini?

That he wasn't so chill. The brains ran out of time. Oh my God. Did you see? No, he was still Italian. There's no way they were getting it on time in places. Did you see the people, like somebody posted posted like this is what happens to fascists? And it was like Mussolini all massacred and hung and dead and everything.

He even gets racist. And get out. That's a little rate. I don't care for that. Which line? What touches the line? As you can see from these drawings I've made. And that was the state of science this is like when washing your hands after surgery was like Yeah, I don't know about that one Taylor may not be a lot of science backing up those claims I mean, there's ear shape. Which ear shape are you?

Are you a self-balanced I'm a candid ear I have there's ear shape. Which ear shape are you? Uh, are you a self-disc? I think I have a balanced... I have a candid ear. I have a candid ear. I'm gonna let you know right now. Is the one in the bottom left an elf ear? Why is it so pointy? Yeah, it says poxy. What does the top center one say? I think that's me. Masculine. Hey. It beats selfish, which also might be me. Man, being a fucking scientist back there must have been so much fun. You just like see a guy with a fucked up ear and you're like, I know. I know what's going on here. You're a bad dude. You're a dad. I tripped on the way home from school. Of course you did. Now, sometimes because I don't think anyone would argue

that this guy has a surplus of vital magnetism. He's definitely deficient in vital magnetism. The fact that he's measuring something that he's self-div... Vital magnetism? Like, all right, I can figure out what that means, but what the fuck does he mean? Dude, I can't believe I spent like $65 on this. He looks like Pinky from Pinky and the Brain.

Let's see, there were a couple. One is the other's insane. Ah, the nose shape. What do you guys? Oh, my. Oh, I don't think Mondo's looks like here. Maybe the I think Mondo's is balanced. All these are crazy cartoon like. Yeah, these are cartoon noses like that chef boyardee over there.

What they go either balanced Which is bottom near the right or neutral which is top near the left. Oh, you're very bad left is like gargamel Yeah, you got that balance nose a thousand percent. That's like they drew you I think Look at this. That's where you keep the home country Family and love sentiments in the fuck is this book? What kind of fucking nonsense? I saw this guy. I was like, I can't believe this. There was a there was a still in a meme of one of these weird heads.

This is like a couple of years ago now. And I saw it and it made me laugh so much that I spent time tracking down this book and I had to buy it off like a non Amazon site like some like historical reference site that was like we do not endorse this I'm like wow really do you need to say that you don't endorse the ear shape book you fucking retard like obviously you don't it's just fun who's the publisher me the white knight the white Knights of the Ku Klux Klan. Unfortunately, a lot of this kind of stuff was used for eugenics, racism, genocides,

justification of a lot of terrible things and maltreatment of people. L.A. Vought was the publisher. It just has a picture of what the original thing looked like. Not a good sign. It was also published in 1902. Common then? Like you would self publish this in the medical journal, sell your own books, travel from town to town, sell your phreniology books or whatever. Yeah, come here, come on.

Find out what shape your head is and what it means. Yeah, I'm not buying it. They did that. They had like the calipers. They would like measure your head, right? Like like like candy. Yeah. And Django Unchainedained when he's got that old slave skull and he's like talking about how it works. Oh, that's that's a good scene. That's one of my favorite scenes from that movie. I feel like DiCaprio kind of takes that movie over when he comes into it.

He's so interesting and diabolical. Genuinely great movie. Now, something you might also know is that similar to dogs, narrow-headed men are not threatening. Look at those photos. But he says that broad-faced men are threatening. Now this seems to go against a couple of the other images we've seen. He is like savage Americans and African Americans next to snake. The Native American looks like the Native American version of kingpin. What I like is that like I guarantee this picture at the time was like wildly progressive where he's like yeah there's a wide-faced white man and a narrow-faced white man and a wide-faced non-white guy and a narrow-faced non-white guy. I'm gonna catch hell from the Klan over this. But it's true, there are broad-headed among every race. This guy just like the most

misguided progressive of all time. That's the thing, even the most progressive people now in all likelihood will be viewed as regressive in the future. Sort of the nature of the. Yeah, those those those of the word. Yeah, the minor attracted persons are going to be in welcomed into the fold any day now. Taylor and I can see it coming. I think that's mostly a troll.

Not I don't know. No, we see it genuinely don't believe that's a real group of people. Flat Earthers are trolls. You're telling me Dr. Disrespect is fake. No, I'm not saying. He's real. I'm saying the maps movement, people that fight for legitimacy of maps,

the vast majority of that is fake. That's like a troll. You are putting down the struggles of an aspiring pedophile and fish streamer. Everywhere, aspiring pedophiles everywhere. I did the best video on Dr. Disrespect. How many times do you feel personally attacked?

Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Well, god damn it. It's a standard of laziness. Man, this book rules. We gotta to... Oh man. Pick yourself up one of these, folks. I kind of want one. It's fun. It's a fun little novelty. Everyone I've shown this in real life has found it hysterical and really interesting. Would work. Could you make a shirt that's like a lineup of funny examples that aren't racist. Yeah, like the ones that are racist. The sky's the limit. They could do that too, I guess. I don't want to. I like that the noses have are indicative of trustfulness and trustworthiness and like loving being a good mother was a bulge, was like a divot in the back of her head at seeing.

No, that was being a bad mother. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I can only imagine that a bulge back there. A 14, is that okay? Let's keep it a secret. This is a thumbnail I did for the- Oh, this is your thumbnail. Okay. Nice.

I got AI to make me some funny ones. I had, cause I thought it was funny to have him like in a lab coat as a real doctor treating children like doctor Disrespect pediatric medicine so I went down a whole rabbit hole like that. No one else thought it was funny at all I like dr. Kid inspect Kyle didn't think that was funny. No, I didn't know what about He's got hair over the yarmulke. Like he's trying to hide it. Man, I've never seen a human being that looked like that.

Right? I don't want to see a human being that looked like that. Who wasn't a victim of a shotgun. Like incident, right? You ever see those guys who've been shot in the head and they live and they've got like huge pieces of their skull missing? Yeah.

But there was a guy in gray- That'd be considered what we see ghosts with. What the fuck is that? That's fucking a wish a guy in what we see ghosts with. What the fuck is that? What we see ghosts with. That's like an air mode. Get the fuck out of here with that. Why are there eyes? This guy like loses his mind as

the book goes on like it's it's almost compared to this page like 88 page one is almost sensible. So, yeah, I guess someone with a nose ears like that could be a little shady and now he's talking about he's drawing human heads as balloons saying aspiration above them that's okay I don't even know what to do with anything full Kafka s absurdism here it looks like uh what's that old book? It's of scary. It's like a dolly. Yes scary stories They're telling the dark. Yeah, it looks like the cover of that. It reminded me so much of that art style and that like creepy darkness

But but no, I think the map people look I think there's trolls in every movement I think that the flat earthers and the birds aren't real people you've got like 25% mental ill people 70% pranksters, jokesters, and trolls, and then 5% of people who believe, believe, who are like the birds aren't fucking real. I'm telling you, I shot one, I took it apart, it was a robot, it had Chinese chips in it. I'm telling you, they're none of them are real. And the birds aren't real is absolutely a fake group. They're not really. That's very well documented. Flat earth,

unfortunately, I think you're wrong about. I think a shocking amount of people believe the earth is flat. I've run into too many of them, some in the cod community, depressingly. You would do if you did your research. Kyle convinced me on this over time because I want to believe that there are actual flat earthers because I want to see like there are actual Flat Earthers because I want to see their video where they go balls to the wall and are like, it's fucking flat. And then, because it's interesting, it's fun.

It's like following Warhammer, Lord of the Rings lore. But I don't think there's very many of them. Just what Kyle said over the years and then noticing a couple of things, I really do think even some of those like flat earth society, like accounts, I think those are trolls who are enjoying that they've found that more likely those people, but I don't,

I feel like it's an auditorium of people and that it's like 85, 90% of the auditorium are playing a joke on the 10%. Like not even that, not even that, not even that they're playing the joke on that 10% because they love explore. Not even that, not even that, not even that. They're playing the joke on that 10% because they love seeing them like, yeah, I believe it too. They also enjoy that you get to wind up and waste the time of actual intellectuals. And you get to muddy the water sometimes

if it's a political sort of, I don't believe in global warming. I don't believe in global warming personally, at least I don't know how. I believe that the world's getting warmer or whatever. Climate change is happening, but I'm not sure that human beings are a big enough cause of it that it fucking matters. That's what I believe.

But I just don't think that there is a flat earth. And I think that most people know that that's true. But it can get Neil deGrasse Tyson to be like, actually, and respond to you. That's a little bit of power that you took with your joke. And yeah, you forced you forced a real world reaction with your nonsense. And they're laughing at that. He should be doing other black man science things. You're forgetting a very important section of the

wasting the religious group. Like there's a lot of people that are flat earth because the Bible says to the corners of the earth indicating that the Bible means that the earth is flat. So translate through like fucking times. It doesn't matter. Dude, these are people that think the King James version is the original version of the Bible. Oh my God, you speak Arabian? This is not the high education crowd. I know a ton of Christians. Most of my friends are Christians and none of them are flat earth people. Right, most are not, but you also have

probably met some people so balls deep on Jesus juice and into that sort of stuff that they have all sorts of esoteric beliefs. Do you know any young earthers? Do you know? Yeah, I bet I know a few young earthers, but I don't like I'm just saying, like, I feel like I would have come across a flat earther in my in my travel. So young, so young earthers is actually where these are real people because religion comes into play now And we've got a deity promising and we got a magical book telling us And it's other than just a YouTube videos in the Earth's flat or the birds aren't real or whatever This is like a real fucking thing. So I

I've seen I like to watch my like I don't know sciencey shit on YouTube and the algorithm starts autoplaying this book and this guy's making a lot of sense. He's in front of a big, it looks like a Ted talk. It's not though. I promise you because he starts referencing the Bible and I'm okay with a little bit of referencing it. If it's up, if it's like, well, you know, the Bible says that Judea was actually located 50 like miles from this river. It's like, okay, well I, they might be onto something there. It's a historical document in many ways. Like if we're talking about cities, places, and distances, that stuff rings true sometimes. But then, like, he gets around to start talking about how, like,

coal is formed really quickly sometimes and how this forest was petrified. This is a petrified forest. Happened in 37 years. And I'm like, wait a minute, I don't know about that. And he starts saying some stuff that I can't disprove, but it doesn't sound right. Some of that, who's the black actor who was talking about all the crazy shit? Terrence Howard. Terrence Howard. I'm starting to get that Terrence Howard thing.

And he goes like, and thank the Lord, I saw the light. And I realized that carbon atom, let me tell you something about the carbon atom. And I'm like, oh no. There's a creature telling me about. What's the something about the carbon atom." And I'm like, oh no! What's the deal with you about the carbon atom? Them half-lives? Don't worry about it. You worry about your life, son. Your everlasting soul, because they ain't got no half-life. I'm like, oh no! This isn't science at all! I've been doing it! So you can definitely get drug into some stuff if you're religious enough

and then you're gullible But the young earth thing I really hate I hate that more than almost anything because I can get their dinosaurs deniers because it's so all right I'll lay out my little argument on the on the younger thing But like the idea that we're going on God's Word in Genesis like it's verbatim like factual like taking notes Like so we made the stars then too, right? He made the heavens and the earth and the firmament and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

But that light from those stars, we can measure how long it took to get here. And we know almost exactly how fast light is. So we got like a clock running in the sky all the time. So it just doesn't add up. It doesn't add up. Even if carbon half-lives don't matter. And like, we can't actually measure how old something is,

which isn't true. Yeah, why would God make the universe appear so much older to all the way that we're able to observe it? If that's what he was doing. It sounds like you guys just can't understand God's plan, which is understandable. You're only human.

So can't. That's true. But I don't think part of his plan would be tricking people. Well, it sounds like God should have made a is understandable. You're only human. So, yeah. That's true, but I don't think part of his plan would be tricking people. Well, it sounds like God should have made a more understandable plan, and that's a problem because he's a God. Isn't it curious that God will be very generous with the Bible? The Bible's very literally true and maybe God said the earth is 6,000 years old or some nonsense like that. Roughly, yeah. Why did God make the earth 6,000 years ago, but build it in a way

to where it looks a lot older? Like the thing you live on is inherently deceptive and trying to get you to believe something different. That doesn't seem like a very straightforward honest or benevolent God. When I was in like, when I was like in church or whatever, maybe I didn't, the church I was at as a kid wasn't extreme enough, but they were more like, yeah, time does not exist to us the way it does to God. That seven days that he talks about in the beginning, it's silly for us to think this is seven days the way we see it. It says to God, a day is like a thousand years and a thousand years is like

a day. That's how they explain it. Even that isn't meant to get you to start fucking doing math or anything. It's supposed to get you in the frame of mind. And that's how I saw it as a child, without anyone telling me. It's like, he doesn't mean seven days. He means that the Lord worked for what felt like a week to him building the goddamn universe. What felt like a week to him? Not enough work week with overtime. building the goddamn universe. Yeah. But it felt like a week to the truth. It's not enough work week with overtime.

Like if you look in the Old Testament, they always are using like, ah, and then fucking the Israelites did this for 40 days and 40 nights. Like they use that number all the time in the same way we will say something like, oh, there's millions of examples of this. Like that's just meant for them to say it was a long time of constant effort to get something done. And I'm not trying... I think there are a lot of things that are in the Bible that are historical, but there's lots of nonsense, too. And the problem is, I think Aramaic was the

language of Jesus. Am I wrong about that? That was the primary language of Jesus. Yeah, it's been... Like, what He what he spoke? Or what the Bible... The Bible, the Old Testament would have been written in, like, ancient... The Dead Sea Scroll? No, the New Testament would have been written in Greek. I said Old Testament. Oh, I'm sorry. A lot of the disciples, or some of them, would have translated to Greek, or they would have been Greek themselves. So, you've got multiple translations from translated to Greek or they would have been Greek themselves. So you've got multiple translations from ancient languages in some cases and then what the part that really always upsets me is when you get into the horse trading that happened in the I think it's the Roman Senate about what was going to stay in and what was going to stay out and then again it happened when King James made his little fucking

edit. It's just... I think that was the Council of Nicaea. The Council of Constantinople. Nicaea. In Constantinople, or Emperor Constantinople, wrote that. And they... There was horse trading for that, where like one senator wanted... He's like, I don't know, that book, the book of Jose over there, they're saying some things. Come on. This is why people look bad. That's what we do. We already got Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John, and you're trying to add the Gospel of Thomas?

Some second rate guy? There's multiple- We're not adding him. There were multiple Gospels that were excised. And I don't know, the whole thing- It's as if the whole religion was created by man. It's really interesting. If you look at the-

It's clearly not a dogma forged by a god. That's the thing. That's the most telling thing to me about all holy books. You can tell a dude wrote this or a bunch of dudes. There's no understanding that rises to the power and the knowledge of an omnipotent, omniscient god built into that book. At no point is he like, and then I used this technique to turn protons and to the end to matter and and and and thus there's no science

there's no even like old-timey speak for science you know what I mean like like it's just like exist yeah there's no cons so let's go back to the Flat Earth stuff on this religious thing. I don't believe it's all that Earthers. I think most of them are fit in control. But there's an overlap though of very religious people that did not reason themselves into this position to begin with. They probably got there through emotion and talking about the light of the stars and the carbon dating and this real science and how it affects our lives. The moment you've said that,

you've already lost the argument to them. They've already checked out. You've probably heard the phrase, you can't reason somebody out of a position they didn't reason themselves into to begin with. It has nothing to do with facts and logic. It has nothing to do with real science improving stuff. For a lot of those people that operate

on maybe more of an emotional basis instead of a logical one, that's very stressful for them. And they probably won't do it or won't give you the mental time and acuity that's required to understand these concepts. And it's why they're attracted to flat earth. Are you afraid to die? Honestly, yeah, I'm pretty afraid to die. I think with all the hell I went through, I probably would have killed

myself if I wasn't afraid of dying. I think with all the hell I went through, I probably would have killed myself if I wasn't afraid of dying. What would it concern you about dying? I think it's awesome to be alive. Alive is opportunity, it's hope, it's interesting. There's new, there's next, there's fun things to do. Dying, all that goes away. Even in the more generous aspect of, you know,

nothing happens, it's like before you were born, you don't experience anything. That's bullshit. I want to keep experiencing things for a long, long time. I feel like the fact that I have to die means that I was cheated a little bit out of my existence. And nothing really mattered. Yeah. Like, I know, I know what you're like. It didn't matter at all. I think it was, I don't remember who said it. It was like Christopher Hitchens or some shit, but it was many years ago, he said like, the really wild thing about death is like, like all of life is like a party, you know, there's bad parts to it, but like you're here. And like the party doesn't end when you die. Like you

just have to leave. And so like every experiences continue. As you age, you become ever closer, like kind of realizing this is ending. And when it ends for you, it's a little blip for everyone else. It's a major thing for the people you love and care about and all that, but it fades. It goes away. Like you're just not a part of existence. And that's horrifying. That's so scary to think I'm just not going to be anymore. I don't even matter if you remembered like an Alexander the great or a Julius Caesar or a FDR or would that matter to you that you left? No, not just a legacy, but but that children would be taught your name and your acts if it was a good legacy.

Yeah. Like if you were like Stalin or something, everyone was going to hate you. No, but like if you were known for people if you are you might now knowing that the things we've done And you guys that have created an incredible amount of content influenced millions of people around the world You've left a mark people will speak your name for a long time after you're dead But when you're dead, you don't have consciousness. So none of that matters to you personally. It all just blips away. But maybe knowing it makes the rest of it easier.

It's like a comfort leading up. Yeah, exactly what Kyle said. It's like a comfort leading up to death. Like if you're some guy who lived his whole life as like a misanthropic shut-in, who hated people and was rude, no family, no kids, no nothing, like that person approaching death is probably a lot scarier than someone who like really built something of their life. They have kids, they have success. And so they at least can backwards engineer in their head like, all right, I'm not going to be forgotten. I've got this, that, and the other thing. Whereas like approaching death and knowing it's going to end and that you didn't do anything with life. I think our stories are not to be existentially like terrifying.

It's not like this. I want to get up and I've been quiet and go for it. These things don't matter to me at all. I don't give a fuck. Like I can't relate to giving a fuck about like a legacy or people thinking about me afterwards. What I do care about is the people that I've touched are okay after I'm gone. Like I do like a, in my life, I pull the locomotive, right? Like in this family of mine. And I just wanna make sure that after I stop pulling,

they're ambulatory on their own. Remember like legacy, people still think, like that stuff doesn't matter at all, just that they're able to continue on without my help. Like that's own form of legacy. No, yeah but that's the most touching thing I've ever heard you say and I totally agree. I don't give him credit for that. He gets credit for that. Take it away. He's actually a pretty good guy. No he's not stop it. Yeah and then I like that one that one's like hoping that the people you love are taken care of and that you've done all that you can do and for them. I kind of like, I don't know, like

the historical kind of thing. Like having a statue of you would be a nice thing or having like genuinely like if you flatter like Lincoln good like like like if you could bring Lincoln back oh we have her these pictures would he put on twitter at 50 all right no carve the pants really big that's what he was wearing if you could bring Lincoln back to life and you'd be like your legacy has lived on there are your story is told and has been retold and seen by millions in theater houses all around the world because he'd know what that is. They don't know what movies are but you just you know and by millions of people every American

knows your name. This is the five dollar bill sir. That is your monument on top of that hill right there. You're 25 feet fucking tall or something like that in there. Like people think people call you honest aid. People call you the savior and the reunifier. The man who's who saved who freed the slaves. And then maybe you show him like what black people have gone on to do. He'd be like, so stoked. He'd be so stoked. He'd be like whoa. I didn't mean I mean free free He'd be like too far

Did that in a Doctor Who episode Barack Obama museum What did you say drifter in a Doctor Who episode one of their most touching ones, they brought Vincent van Gogh, who was a failure at that time of his life, to the Van Gogh Museum to see his art and his influence and what it became. It was, I don't watch a lot of Dr. Who, I watched that. It was incredibly touching. That may maybe even be like the triggering part

when they're showing him all of his paintings and all the people there to see them. He's like, what is this place? Well, this is the Van Gogh museum of natural arts. And it's like, that was a, I cried at that episode. It's genuinely sad. Now dude, in real life, he'd be going around and be like, your women, the shorts, the cleavage, incredible. This isn't Christian at all. I think he'd be good with it.

I thought Van Gogh was into like whores and drugs and stuff. I heard that the ear thing was a lie. He was into like abstinence of a great number of things in poverty. Like he was a missionary and he gave his missionary money away to live in poverty because that was more holy. Who was that virgin? Wasn't Isaac Newton like hyper religious like virgin his whole life? He believed in witches and he was probably schizophrenic as well.

I think he also tried not to have contact with women at all because he was afraid that any woman could be a witch. I mean, better to say, I'm sorry. He needed his free time to think about gravity and physics. Yeah, dude, think of that guy was getting laid. Believing in which figured out all those cool things. Believing in witches in his day is of a fuck. No, not at all It's not like this fucking philat crazy book of Taylor's like, ah, yeah skull shape really does determine things

It's like I don't know man stuff happens sometimes and we can't explain I mean anyone has been watching those they're witchy for about five days a month a month. So, I mean, there's a lot of new to the invented calculus, if I'm not mistaken, calculus as a mathematics did not exist at all before Newton, he invented it on his own to explain the natural world. Can you imagine that being like, these witches are stressing me out so much. I'm just going to invent math. Yeah, he tried to use his math and calculus to prove stuff about witchcraft and angels and biblical numerology and stuff. I wonder if any of that stuff got published. You know, I would like to I want to see a full Newton book, including those theories. I want to see the whole gamut,

because it'd be like chapter two, calculus, chapter three, the weight of witches in water. And it'd be like all right what did he figure out Neil deGrasse Neil deGrasse Tyson I got it on right here sir Isaac Newton no that's not it he did publish some of these he was talking about Newton and saying here's the book philosophy Philosophy Naturalis Principa Artis Magicus. I'll show you an excerpt from the book on my little cam. Let me go do the transition thing here to desktop capture. Here are some pages. Yeah, it was all this kind of stuff.

It was like it was like biblical mysticism and stuff. You can see all the like, what are these called? Arcane or occultic symbols going on. Little characters, interesting. I need to find more. What do they have to do? I'll put the title of the book in the chat. It's a big mess. Newton did all sorts of stuff like that,

but you're not wrong that in his day, they were hunting witches. As far as he and almost everybody else was concerned, witches were real. And I mean, the earth, some people knew it was round, not everybody. I'm not a thousand percent sure witches aren't real. Or they never were real. You know, like, and I don't believe that any women have ever, like, made a deal with, like, the devil from the Bible and, like, gotten any powers or sent any curses. But I don't know. Maybe we're in some kind of a simulation and there's some weird stuff going on that we still can't grasp a hold of. Or maybe there's another dimension where

there's some demon-like being who could come here and do some weird stuff. I'm not a thousand percent sure. I don't think the simulation thing makes sense. An extra spatial dimension? I don't think the simulation thing makes sense. Extra spatial dimension. I don't know why you say that. Cause it's just like an even more complicated end point than just God. Like just like, oh, there is a God basically,

but he isn't a guy who created people. He created a magnificent algorithm that then that algorithm created us. And it's like, you just- Yeah, but then you could understand that. You've just taken the beginning point and added nonsense to try and comport the God theory too. I got rid of all the nonsense. You had to invent a word God to start like a made up thing that doesn't exist.

You start with a made up thing to explain how the universe existed. I'm saying Dave fucking made the universe in his office and it's it could be... Who's Dave? A being outside of space, time, and restrictions of physical world? No, he's in his own universe and the laws and the things... Who made that universe? Hang on. The laws and the things in his universe could be exactly like ours or he could be testing weird like ways the universes could be held together and the laws on them. But I get your point that there could be a god that has to create his universe before. Because if you say Dave is just a guy from another universe then you've just created an

infinitely recycled. It's like the Rick and Morty battery episode but there's also a great sci-fi novel where people build an infinite computer, infinite computational power. And as a joke, they decide to simulate the universe and are shocked at how accurate it is. And they fast forward time and it's like, Whoa, that's Jesus being crucified. And they like fast forward in time to see themselves in their own simulated universe. And they're like, all right, we can do anything we want. Let's fuck with these digital versions of ourselves. And let's put this big menacing black orb in the room with these computer scientists.

And they do it. And as soon as they do it, a big orb pops up in their room. And they realized that they created infinite computational power and simulated themselves, who then in that universe simulated themselves. And it's all the way down. And in all likelihood, there's little to no deviation from top to bottom.

Nobody knows where it ends. what happens over and over. Yeah. So every decision that they make as above, so below, it kind of mirrors. And Taylor, Kyle is completely right about this because there is actually objective empirical science that at least indicates the simulation theory of the universe could be real. Like if you look at particle physics, local, what is it? Local reality isn't actually real.

It doesn't hold up. You know, the electron is a wave and a particle and that kind of stuff. particle physics, local, what is it? Local reality isn't actually real. It doesn't hold up. You know, the electron is a wave and a particle and that kind of stuff. Quantum entanglement is very bizarre. The way black holes radiate energy is very bizarre. I think quantum entanglement actually defies a few of the laws of physics,

because when you dis-entangle, you can transmit information faster. Is a more sensible explanation for that not making sense that there are infinite universes or that the heuristic through which we're analyzing these particles is incorrect. Because that's what I would like. The same way you would look at mold on bread hundreds of years ago and not understand the mechanisms through which that was happening. We could be looking at sub particle physics with an incorrect heuristic and not know what's going on.

And so we're attributing that to the same way a religious person would attribute that to God and his marvels or whatever, you can attribute it to, oh, well, clearly this doesn't work. It must be some programmer in the infinity beyond that's doing this. It's sort of dismissive in a way because science, you want to base your beliefs on your best knowledge and as we've talked

that's changed. It evolves over time but you still try to make the best decisions and some of the things that we've observed about the universe is that it behaves very much so or like a holographic projection or perhaps a little bit more like a simulation than we're comfortable with and we don't have an analogous physics or word or experience to describe what we're seeing other than you know It's a lot like the idea of a simulation, you know It's a lot like the idea of a computer program and that's to be honest with you probably

Tangling is the quantum entanglement thing and the the the slits with the particles going through it are so Mind-bending to me and like you said transfer the idea of trans Transmitting information faster than the speed of light using quantum entanglement. It seems like if you just had I don't know I'm just picturing like 26 particles for each one for a key for a key on a keyboard that had 26 corresponding ones one for a key for a key on a keyboard that had 26 corresponding ones anywhere in the universe and you can flip them on and off and the corresponding one instantaneously does the same thing. It seems like it seems like you're transmitting information faster than if we're in a simulation that is so gay. Oh,'re not even real. No, I think so.

I have a hard time believing that there's like an old man, like an old man, God with like a heaven with streets of gold and stuff that I'm going to go to any happening. Bolts. Yeah. All that nonsense. But like if it's a simulation, maybe there's like a post game screen or something and the credits roll. And they're like, you want to play again?

And you get to like pick your avatar. Now you're a level two player, right? This was level one. This is like that part of the video game where the tutorial, they teach you to throw the grenade, how to duck, how to dodge, how to jump. Like time for level two, Kyle. Now you know all the controls.

Do I get a custom avatar this time? Well, of course. I'm gonna be popular at high school this time around. So popular. You're like there at the postgame screen and you're playing with your stat attribute. You're like, man, do I want to be popular or do I want to be healthy? Or like, do I want my dick to be big or do I want to be jacked? And you're just kind of like creating your next character.

Every time you play through, you know, I'm going to use this book and give myself a trustworthy nose. It's also kind of like the short story, the egg for those of you that. What if your karma? What if your karma has been counted your whole life? You're up your goods and bad deeds.

And at the end, when you go to level two after you die, that's your currency that you spend on your new character. That's how many special points you have. You're like, oh no. We're all the way back to religion now. Isn't Hinduism the one with reincarnation? And Buddhism?

Yes. Reincarnation, you're supposed to go through several cycles until you reach enlightenment. You can move up or down. Most people, like the stock market, it can go up and down, but for the most part, you're progressing forward over the long run. Yeah, that would kind of be a cool system. But also it's like, it's not even fair, because if you have literally no memory of a previous life, how are you? So you're just supposed to lock in. We're level one characters. We didn't have a previous life. Next time we get one that this level. So we do have memory of our previous life.

We keep this whole thing on board. Yeah. Are we born in the same year next time around? What's that? Are we born in the same year or does it keep going? Because I have some stock market picks to make. You get to pick. So you can do like an LA Noire type vibe. You can do like a Cyberpunk type vibe. You can pick a universe the second time. That's tight. You should come up with religions, man I mean real talk if you were going to hover too over here like my I won't I won't fucking take all your secrets

And make you hold on metal rods and my guys question If you were god and you had a lot of time to do things Wouldn't you at least once to be curious? Build a simulated universe and live in it without your godly memories, just so that you could have a unique experience or whatever. Yeah. I don't think you even could have a unique experience if you're omnipotent and omniscient. It's kind of, that would be like, like building a little Lego world and then being like, I'm just gonna lose myself in the Lego world. Cause like even your presence there would be a constant reminder that you are

engaging yourself in like- This has been done several times in sci-fi and fiction. I'm watching- You wouldn't remember it. You would remove your own memories. So to you, it just feels fun and fresh and new. It's just a good thing to do. You could remove- Yeah, I wonder how that would- That would probably would be interesting. It'd be like deleting your memory of a movie, watching it again or something. I can't remember the show or whatever But God doesn't know that he's God. He's like lost his memories. He's living on earth and in Agua I know in supernatural something like that happened dogma

Maybe I thought he was death. No, that's me Joe black No dogma is like the angels that That Kevin Smith movie, but I'm watching preacher right now Which is is actually written very good dude that wrote the boys preachers fucking good And read the books those those comics suck. Yeah, I'm not gonna but God is is on earth And he's just living his worst life. Just just like pouring it up I think he was he was wearing like a BDSM dog suit like Dalmatian dog And it's such a joke because God is just dog backwards and it is it is the dog I Never put that together. But but yeah, that's fucking good. Yeah, I've seen it

I've seen it all before but I'm rewatching it right now on Netflix It's one of the more gory gruesome like ridiculously violent shows I've ever seen There'll be like a board meeting and you'll think everything's chill and the dude will pull out a shotgun and murder everyone. Like people explode all the time. It's a gory, gory show. For broadcasts, yeah, very gory. Yeah, FX does cool shit. They've always done edgy stuff. Going back to like the shield and nip-tuck. The author is Garth Ennis. He wrote The Boys. He wrote Preacher, Crossed, and a few others. I've read a number of his works, both Preacher and The Boys, he wrote Preacher, Crossed and a few others. I've read a number of his works, both Preacher and The Boys, the original comics. They aren't even remotely as good as the shows that are based on them.

The original works are, in many ways, a little bit childish. It was written in the 90s where the big joke was Richard Gere put a gerbil in his butt. That's kind of like the edgiest thing in the book besides some gore. They do mention that in The Boys. And philosophically, he's also very different. So Garth Innes is a conservative, but he's a UK conservative. So like how the boys is obviously left wing and woke or whatever. Now, the comic book is the exact opposite or like Homelander does 9-11. And George W. Bush is the hero that saves everybody. And Al Gore is the villain. And it's kind of got like this completely opposite

Philosophy, but it's not really well done. It's a little little underbaked. He's getting another TV series on his Comic books called crossed which are some of the most disgusting things I've ever seen in my life It's imagine if the walking dead had no soul and was basically hero porn It's like the people get a zombie virus, but they retain their intelligence or that movie on shutter. The sadness almost got sued because they copied so much from Frost. Like it just, people just start raping and murdering and eating babies. I think the comic book opens up with somebody like ripping a baby out of a pregnant woman. It has no merit. Nothing happens. It is just an endless excuse to like animate horrible ways for people

to die. And somehow it's getting a big budget TV show and I have no idea how that's going to work. Yeah, I don't know about that one. Preachers good though. It's on Netflix. It's fucking good. It's basically about a Texas preacher who gets sort of the voice of it's not exactly that but the voice of God essentially so he can command other human beings to do anything he says. there's a part. It's just the one with a butthole mouth guy. You remember this. Oh Yeah, I know my car from my my girl. Nobody likes the butthole mouth guy. My girlfriend hated that It's a very sadder body character, man He's not though. How was he sympathetic a girl turned him down

So he shot her in the head and put a shot in his mouth. He did not shoot her in the head. She shot herself in the head. And he realized he was immediately going to be blamed for it, because he was the town's biggest loser, and decided before he goes to jail for life, he's gonna kill himself.

But he's such a big loser, he failed at killing himself. That's right. See, I'm doing my rewatch, and they haven't revealed that that little tidbit Yeah, but he gets it there's a part where the preacher gets annoyed with him and he goes Eugene go to hell and Eugene falls through the goddamn floorboards to the dimension of hell. He actually goes there And the preachers like fuck

He's in hell for like two seasons man Yeah, it's rock and hell. Does the preacher have the power to send people to hell or does that guy just do everything he's told? It's that when he said if he uses this power he has to tell you to do a thing. Preacher. Yeah. Yes. It not only are you commanded to do your best to achieve it but it just kind of happened in that instance where he said go to hell the guy just like Like like he didn't want to go he just fell and like vanished and went there But he could you know, you can tell you to put a gun in your mouth or whatever And the comic books there was a guy he just said he just yelled at him

Die and his heart just stopped and he just fucking died. That's cool He told this guy and he meant to be for it to be good advice This guy's been pestering him one of his parishioners about his mother. They had this odd relationship and he's like look Just open your heart to her. Tell her how you really feel and get it over with he's like All right And he starts walking and he walks goes to the airport and he flies from Texas to Florida and he goes to his mother and he's like You've got to stop treating me this way if you would treat me with some kindness and consideration

I want to feel the love from you that I deserve from my mother. It's not right that you always treat me this way." And she's like, what? What? Well, and now I'm going to open my heart to you. And he starts like undoing his shirt. And he cuts his body open with a knife and rips his own heart out and then dies as he's handing his heart to his mother and there's blood and guts and shit everywhere and the mother's screaming Ah, it's a great scene the whole shows like that every see he told he told one guy to believe in God But didn't specify the God so this guy believed in his own personal God and which was led a disastrous results Yeah, he tells the most powerful guy in town. This is this millionaire like industrialist who runs the everything he's like serve God and the guy I will with all my heart and he like leaves and he's like he's serving the god of meat

He's like, what's the god of meat the guy's a meat processor tangible. Yeah, he's all he's one of the he sits in his office And he doesn't masturbate but it seems like he he almost wants, and he listens to the audio of cows being like killed at a slaughterhouse, just like the, the, the piston gun and their fear and them dying. And he jacks off. No, we just had to cut like, they cut this from the comics in the comics. It's a very similar thing, except he has like his private meditation room where you don't bother him and he has his meat and his animals in there. And the preacher goes, of course,

and like kicks down the door to ruin his day and finds this old man naked. And there's like a 12 foot tall, horrible amalgamation of a golem of various slaughtered animals and meats. And he's like jerking off in the blood and like peeling on the veins and like putting his head in a dead cow's ass

and like really like fucked up stuff. So you could probably see why they didn't put that in the blood and like peeling on the veins and like putting his head in a dead cow's ass and like really Like fucked up stuff. So you could probably see why they didn't put that in the fx. Yeah Yeah, the guy's whole family died and he lost his mind There's a scene where it's clearly his entire family is on doing like a family reunion ski trip and they're in one of those trams Oh, do you know under the wire and they all plummet to their death? And so he's sitting in his office and they send like I'm not gonna exaggerate 15 coffins are like shipped and sitting in his office and he's great He's gone crazy and he's like you gotta help me. You gotta help me understand Which one of these the cow and which one's my 12 year old daughter? He's got guts in his hands

He's got a gut. He's like intestines in his left hand and intestines is right He's like brought a cow in and killed it. And he's like looking at their intestines to like, he's gone crazy. It's, it's a dark show. It's good time to. Yeah. That sounds upsetting. I wouldn't like that. But there's heaven and hell and there's angels. There's vampires. I didn't like butthole face either. What he he's very disconcerting. I, I hate it so much. I can't watch the show. I don't want butthole face on my TV.

I don't want him in my home, he's not invited. I wouldn't invite him, he's disgusting looking. Zach, can you show us Eugene from the TV show? You don't even have to. Heartless or maybe y'all just have weak stomachs, I didn't find it disgusting at all. I don't want him on my screen, I can't watch the show, I can't tolerate it.

And Kyle's just not that bad. Go ahead and pop that disgusting little bitch up on the screen. Maybe I've been living in Shudder Original Land for too long, but it didn't really phase me that much. Well, it's not that it's like, oh, I can't look. It's just gross. Imagine, how's he going to eat? You've seen how he eats. He eats these. Oh, it's disgusting. No, I checked out of that show earlier. Spoo blends it, drinks it like a smoothie.

Preacher. Like maybe three episodes into that show, I checked out of that. Drinks it like a smoothie. Preacher like maybe three episodes into that show. I'm like, this is retarded. And then I saw so good. But do you all out there watch and then you can laugh at how bad Taylor's judgment of TV shows is because he doesn't think it's a good show. And it's a great show. Eugene's gross to look at. And I wish he wasn't in the show.

It's not that I wish he was more. I wish he was better looking. Do that's so bad. This is bad. but when you see it animated when he talks and he has a lot of lines like he's a main character he sounds worse than he looks and in in movement this is worse that's very true this almost this is the most flattering he's ever looked yes they kind of nailed it right right? Yeah, they're not. What's with the forehead dent?

That's all shot of a wound. Yeah, it's supposed to be like the bullet goes in down here and comes out in the top. Well, you know, maybe first, you don't succeed. The preacher that happened. OK, his dad's the same. And in the comics, the preacher tells his dad to go fuck himself. So he like grabs his dick and like stretches it out really far and like shoves it up his own ass or something. It's wild. I don't need the father of a child in order to own preacher

puts his own dick in his ass. Yeah, no pre-share power forces you to do what he tells you to. Okay. So he got mad and was just like, go fuck yourself. Well, he did exactly that. It's kind of like Wishmaster 2. Somebody like Wishmaster is like, I wish my lawyer would go fuck himself. And he bent over backwards and fucked himself. He like, warts and he's like, whoop, whoop.

Like he does, why am I doing this? That same superpower is- Like I wanna walk right through these bars and right out of prison. And like your wish is granted. You like squeeze us through the bars like a sausage. Did you guys watch Umbrella Academy? Yes. Not an episode. I think season one was good and a lot of people agree with me. Season two wasn't as good

but you still had hope. And season three wasn't as good as two but my dumbass was still hoping for a V-shape pattern, a little rebound. Season four was so bad, it made the other seasons worse. Bleak. Did Ellen Page factor into your like of the show? No, I liked her character okay. The whole trans thing didn't really factor

into my thing at all. Her power was poorly defined. Like for years, she's the most powerful of all the superheroes. But you don't know what her power is. You just know that it's really dangerous if she loses control. That's vibration. It controls vibration of atoms almost anywhere. It kind of like Gambit. It's like a manipulation of energy at an atomic level. But you're right that she had this awesome power, right? I think so, yeah. He controls kinetic energy and vibrations

of molecules and stuff. But this power is awesome. But you can't have this person that can just instantly solve all the problems. So in later seasons, Elliot Page has to get nerfed and muted and sort of Superman with kryptonite and depowered and stuff for there to even be a plot hmm

Well, anyway, I mentioned umbrella academy because one of the characters had that power to make you do what you say Make you do what she says. She just said I've heard a rumor and then anything I've heard a rumor You all love me and now she's a Hollywood star Superpowers are fun. You get the daydream like that. Taylor inserts himself in porn. I like to do it in superhero shows. What would I do if I was Iron Man? How would I handle it? If I, if I was Superman or even Spider-Man, I think I'd go over to Ukraine and win a war for him. Oh no. Spider-Man would struggle in Ukraine. I feel like they drone him right away.

Do you think? I don't think so you get a spider sense? You can't hit him with a bullet. What's he don't have to hit a Blow up everything for like 500 yards Where do you send spider-man? You put him on the front lines? Are you sending them in Russia can spider-man punch a tank and disable it? No, not quite Not even sure even in the new movies. He left the city and he went to the summer one time. They made a big deal in a ferry held a ship together with his arms like that. That must have been with the help of Iron Man. Yeah, in the first one.

But then in the second one, he had like the suburbs and in the suburbs, there's nothing to spider grapple and he's like having to walk. I just don't know what you're going to do with Spider-Man over there. They're gonna gun his ass down. He there's no skyscrapers. Maybe you could send him to Moscow to take out some leadership or something on an all right. All right. That was always the most impactful player in the NFL. That he could do. He would lead the league in rushing every year without a problem. Is that where you go? You would you want to be a two

sport athlete? You know, in in the summers you could play something else Uh, I mean it's up to me really because it is I would be the best in both sports if i'm spider You know what I would do. I swear to god i'd be the best European footballer in the world and I'd do nothing but shit on the sport. You know, it's just shit I like every press conference, how does it feel? This is your eighth World Cup. You know, I'd give it all for one World Series. Just one.

Just one World Series in Major League Baseball in the good old US of A. The greatest country in the world. My soccer fantasy is to be so good, I tweet out like, what is the record for goals scored in one game and then bust it I Just want to shit on the sport from a position of power. That would be that would be beautiful That would be beautiful to me. It's I can't get into that sport at all I think we were right earlier when we talked about rugby being in a good Like transplant over here. I'm surprised. I I imagine the NFL's like

They're like poison those waters whenever they can Yeah, you're rugby league started up in in Dallas shut that down like it's an electric car in the flow of the game I'm convinced that football is a very good spectator game because there's the right amount of scoring you know every point matters but you know it's not like there's only two of them a game. Where's basketball? We all know a lot of those baskets don't matter. It's going to work out fine. Hockey and football, I think have the right amount,

and this is American football, have the right amount of scoring, even though the numbers are wildly different. The number of times scored is pretty comparable. I don't know. The pacing is good. Of course, in football football there's all those breaks but the announcing team is usually so good. It's entertaining to watch. How's rugby?

Does it have the right amount of scoring? It's not too close to basketball or soccer, right? I don't think the points are very high. And I can't believe you say football's pacing is good. It's the most American sport because it has the most advertising time because there's so much downtime. Like if you think about European football, soccer, it really is 90 minutes or however many they're running their asses off with very little breaks.

Football has all that downtime, I genuinely believe, so we can cram more advertising into it. So I think you're right about the ads. I don't think that's just a wild theory. But the downtime doesn't make the game that much easier. They play that much harder I guarantee you can find soccer players walking all the time during their games But that's not true during the play in football. Every one of those guys is going balls of the wall I used to swim and there was a question of which stroke was the hardest now in practice Butterflies the hardest but on game day, they're all the same. Every stroke is a hundred percent.

Everybody finishes every race with everything they had to give. There is no easy stroke on game day. I was trying to figure out how rugby is scored right now. It's like looking up box scores. The last game I could find was rugby world cup, 2023, where South Africa defeated New Zealand 12 to 11. All right. So is each score? I'm trying to figure that out. Yeah. I would imagine it's one point per score.

It's a little different because you can you can run it to their I think you have to run it and kick it between a field goal. But you have to kick that while people are trying to, you know, murder you. But you can also run it and place it on the ground in the end zone, right? Or on a line, specifically? Yeah, kind of like a touchdown of some sort. Okay, a try is five points. A try is scored when the ball is grounded over the opponent's goal line in the end goal area.

Okay, so similar to football, a couple scores each. I wouldn't play sports though, if I actually had superpowers. I would probably do some sort of global takeover, if I'm being honest. I think that's more fun. I'm imagining if I'm like Supermanpowers, I would probably do some sort of global takeover from being honest I think that's more fun. You know, I'm imagining if I'm like Superman or like Homelander like that level of power I think I need you I should be running this thing, right? Yeah, but no think about there's no reason for all these factions

Any there's a reason not to you can only friends or family That's true. And you can only do that once. You think my friends or family? Yes. That would be a very bad idea. You know what I'm going to do? Do you guys watch Invincible? Like Omni-Man? Are you gonna go fuck with the Grayson family? No. But think about it just from a perspective of boredom Kyle. You're Superman who is like, my understanding, pretty immortal. Like lives a long time. You can only conquer the world once and you're going to live forever. You have every motivation to capitalize

on like every lived experience you can before people really wake up to the fact that like, because you can conquer the world at any time. You wanna do that day one as Superman. Why not run the table on the NFL? Why not be successful in a bunch of other stuff? And then when you're not, because you have nothing to fill but time, run the table on the NFL. Why not be successful in a bunch of other stuff? Because I don't want to conquer the universe. Because you have nothing to fill but time, then you do the world conquer.

I'm not conquering the world for the sake of conquering it though. I won't really enjoy the conquering. I'll have to kill probably a couple billion people or something like that. You'll enjoy it. I mean, some of it, when I'm in Asia. You'd make yourself a little fucking outfit. You'd have you go boss to do it. Yes, that or a Superman or Lady Gaga. I can't be a homelander.

I would start. I'm just I'm taking the swastika back. And it has nothing to do with the other guy. I think what you're missing is this. So much of your own happiness is derived from your relationships with the people around you. And if you're a homelander, you have so many enemies, you don't even know who's the one who killed your mom or your dad or your girlfriend or your

wife or whatever. Everybody hates you. And you're like, Oh, shucks. My wife is just smashed by a car. Could have been 7000 different people. My universe is a little bit different than this because, first of all, I'm conquering the world for the good of it. I've got, we're not going to be fighting over things anymore. We're going to like, what's policy number one? What do you sell to them so that they're more, you know, I'm not selling them any- No tax on tips. No, no, but you want to sell to them because you want to be amicable.

You want them to amicably accept your conquering. They're never going to amicably accept my conquering. They're never going to amicably accept my conquering. They never will. And you have to know that going in. Like right away, you've got to lay out your terms. It would go country by country. It would. You show up at some bullshit country and you're like, I'm putting everybody on the same stage.

They're going to be like, oh yes, that sounds very good. I mean, South America, we went in a landslide. All right, they're on board day one. But North America, they're not going to like some of my ideas. Neither is Asia, neither is all of Europe, but they've got to know. I mean, I'm going to, I'm just going to destroy a country immediately. You should make an example of what's the worst country. The worst on what scale. Well, I would pick a, you want to, you want to pick a really bad country that doesn't have too many people?

Because otherwise, they're just going to be like, what, this guy killed all of a country with 200 million people in it? That's going to make it harder to accept. I think North Korea is a perfect little testing ground for my new version of democracy where nobody likes them, and it'll send a message to China, because I don't want to kill 1.2 billion Chinese or whatever it is I'd like to keep them around. Yeah, but I will if I have to but basically I'm gonna get everybody under one Power structure one world government

And there's you you are the government. No, no, no, there'll be a meritocracy in order. I'm bad I'm the Emperor but I'm going to only I'm gonna I'm gonna want the best and brightest I'm gonna have an economic summit where like people bring their ideas to me noted. Can I be on the team? Of course, you're on the fucking team, bro But I invent a position for you don't have anything to really do except you're you're pussy and say I took the job I would go to my good god friend Kyle and I'd be like Kyle I want to be part of the mix but what I don't want is accountability in any way, shape or form. No accountability, no responsibility. I make you pussy inspector of Norway. You're good.

Oh, I don't know if there's a better job. I got a tab on my computer. Pussy inspector of Norway. See, someone from one of the fat countries is like, you're the head pussy inspector, inspect me. And I'm like, that's not my expertise. I deal with Norwegians specifically. The occasional Swede, but even that I'm not stuck with. Sometimes a half Norwegian,

but what you're describing is actually what Homelander tried to do in the boys comics. In the end of the comics, he tries to take over America and then the world. And there's a, in an otherwise pretty stupid comic book There's a point where somebody asked Homelander. How are you planning to rule? How are you gonna manage all of this economy and all this kind of stuff? And he's like, no, no, no, you don't understand

I don't want to be an emperor that has a job to do and a bunch of paperwork and bullshit I want to live like an emperor and opulence and luxury and do what I want. And I will have other people do that work for me, which is why he didn't just kill people. He had the idea that we still need workers or his life is shit. Because even if you're Superman, if everybody on the planet is dead, you can't manufacture any of these nice people. Like my methods would be evil morally, probably. But the outcome, I think be would be you know better

I think if you got the entire like I think of things like the Cold War where you had you know, there's two factions warring against one another and keeping secrets on so many like similar research topics like like where if those scientists were all in the same room working together to solve those problems and be like, ah, I've got, oh, I got the other half of your work and you got the other half of his work and holy shit, what you could advance so much faster. And that's, that would be my goal, you know, just feed all the people. And I want to go to space. I would be big into like, I could just go, you could tell me to be the space program. You could grab the satellites and haul them up there so we wouldn't have to burn all that fossil.

That's going to be a big part of it using my strength to imbue, you know, some of these machineries with some superpowers. Perhaps I don't know if I've got Rayvision. Maybe we can harness that. But what I want, I want them to exactly duplicate duplicate the Star Trek Enterprise, the one seven one day. The D. No, no, no, no, no. I want the enterprise spaceship, the capital card flies. I want one of those.

And so whatever I've got to do to get us, get them to make me one of those, while Patrick Stewart is still alive, I would make it happen. Good luck. I'd make inspiration date is like 2025. I'd have a whole team keeping him alive. Woody, don't worry. They're gonna keep him going

I'm not in the world. Why is gonna live that dude? actually, you should you should allow voting in your world and just have it be like Just a for fun thing people Know when you go to the polls tomorrow you go and hell. Yeah, I am rocky roads gonna win this year That's what y'all are voting for, I promise. Ice cream flavor. You voting for the natural ice cream flavor? I like that.

No, no, no, Ice Cream Tuesday's under my reign globally. Okay, lactose intolerant, I kill them all. There are no more, don't worry about it. Everybody's eating ice cream. I'm fine with that, that is actually. That's a person with an Asian life. That's how we stuff them out. That's how we stuff them out.

I'm comfortable with this conversation. That's pretty racist. Seems like you're gonna be, you know, you know who's the most lactose tolerant people on earth are, you know, whites. I put a team of people working on curing lactose intolerance because I'm a big ice cream fan. Doesn't that rule that our ancestors figured out cheese earlier and now we get to eat cheese with no problems? Big shout out to my European ancestors for eating cheese for so many thousands of years that now I can enjoy this tasty treat. Thank you. That would suck. I feel like Japanese and I'm like, hey, Hirohito, try this. It's called Gouda and you're gonna love it. He's

like, oh, I cannot try this. It ruined digestive trick. You can take it with a little more gumption. It's like a little pill, like even smaller than a Tums. You take it with your first bite of lactose and you're good. Obviously wife's Asian, all in-laws are Asian. It's called lactaid. You can buy the lactaid brand of milk you might've seen in stores. The other brand is a little pill. My lactose intolerant in-laws go to like an ice cream place and they want to eat it. The dad will like pull out this little like six pack and they all just take this tiny little like super small little pill with the first bite of ice cream. We're golden. No problem. Really? Okay. Well then you spread that pill around the entire world and then everyone can

enjoy cheese like your piece. All right, Ice Cream Tuesdays are back on. We don't need to exterminate the Chinese now. I like that. And you can have like almost a... This is why I'm talking these things out instead of sending me flying over to Asia. This is why I... Can I be on your super council?

I feel like I've got useful ideas here. I stopped a genocide already. Only if we put you in like a chair or something. You can be a chief horizontal advocate. Do I have to shave my head and be the backup Patrick Stewart Professor X and a little chair that poots around even if I can walk I'm not allowed Patrick's he was only allowed in that chair you bitch I would I would force Patrick Stewart to stay in character as Jean-Luc Picard 24-7 and hang around with me

So that position is open We do need a professor Xavier and I would love to see you in a hovering golden weirdly shaped chair like or or the Captain Pike chair. That's what I want to see you in the Captain Pike chair from the original series. Zach show me Captain Pike from original Star Trek. Okay. His face is all melted. He's like what he is. It's his enthusiasm. He's like whoa. Whoa. Hold on. Hold on. Captain Pike chair, right?

I have a better idea for this fake you. Yes, this is it, this is it. Dude, inventing fake you is one of the fun things I have. Let me describe Captain Pike and imagine him, oh dang. I was gonna do that face. I was gonna do that face and then describe the chair. Yeah, this is Captain Pike. You're gonna put Drifter in that thing

and make him all dead face? By the way, Woody, this is what happens in the Captain of Strange New Worlds. This is dead-faced? This is what happens in the Captain of the Strange New Worlds. This is his eventuality. This is what happens to him. I saw a different ending in the movies. I think it's a smash through window or something, right? This is worse than Butthole Face. Yeah, so we're watching Strange New Worlds. That was the Kelvin Universe.

So in the main universe that the Strange New Worlds and every other piece of Star Trek is in. This is Captain Marvel. It gets all melted. Do you like which is worse him or butthole face? You got to know you got to you got a six hour flight coach. You're right next to one of them. That guy, a million percent. Yes. You know what else that has mute.

He can only speak with like beeps and shit. That's a nice benefit. I have questions about butthole faces, bruh. Terrible. Open mouth. So it's always getting like dry mouth in there. He's it He's got a drooling. I don't think he brushes. I think it's just like Smelling prey you think he's got you think he's got halitosis with all that dry mouth building up I bet his breath is his diet. Yeah, dude You see what he eats his dad makes him this shake and it's he grabs a fistful of stew beef

He like chopped up raw beef and throws it in with like other like shake stuff And and it turns pink and that's his like dinner. Yeah I want to go back to your your world conquering plan kyle because i'm fascinated by it number one I think north korea playing Kyle because I'm fascinated by it. Number one, I think North Korea might be the best country to make an example of because then, and you don't even have to go scorched earth crazy, you just have to like be definitive enough with it that everyone's like this guy's not playing. If he does this in North Korea, he'll do it to us too. I would destroy the military.

That's so close to China. China's gonna get in line Russia They're gonna get in line the US they're gonna be scared The US is probably actually the country that you would have to worry about the most because we have this This earned arrogance Militaristically, yeah, so you like they For you and you would actually have to like shut down some US military stuff They'd be flying f-15s at you and you'd have to grab them. Chris Bounds No, see, I imagine myself. Chris Bounds You'll literally like Omni-Man.

Chris Bounds Yeah, that's what you have to do. Chris Bounds Because think about it, the US, we're the most powerful country that's ever existed. We're not going to give up our power to some superhero man. And so you have to hope you can cause a big kerfuffle with North Korea. And then when the US fights back against it, I think the rest of the world is going to be like, yo, you gotta get in line. Look what he did to the, I think in phase, in phase one, I don't think I revealed my full like, like plans or whatever. Um, I just take out North.

I think what I want to do is go to the president, like personally and have a conversation with him, like just fly to the oval office. I'm sure it'll make a stink or like, you know, if you every now and then, you know where the president is if you're watching CNN like just go there, right? Just fly there. Just pop in on him and have a little pot. They're going to do that.

I can't stop you. They can't be bulletproof. You do what you want and I'm sure he'd say yeah, just let him talk like what's your alternative and like I am not going to hurt you. I mean, I can kill you right now if I wanted to kill out all of you. I kill all of you right now.

But yeah, don't I'm going to be here. I'm going to be your communications advisor. Don't lead with that. OK, pussy inspector. You just got downgraded to butthole administrator of Puerto Rico. No, can I be butthole administrator of Norway still? Big difference there. Don't like Taylor and you're in the fucking, what was that fat country?

We're talking Naruo. Kyle, you might like this idea. You can be fast as I'm on your council. There's another like evil Superman thing, a little bit older one called Irredeemable. It's actually going to be a Netflix show very soon. He conquers the world. The United Nations isn't really like capitulating to his demands. So he goes to the island of Singapore, which is about four million people,

and takes the island and fucking throws the entire island into space, like breaks it off of the bottom of the ocean, annihilates everything. The map has changed. Ten minutes later at the United Nations, it's like, OK, so what's the new peace plan with our new leader? What should we be doing, sir? Like, dude, they need to throw one of the mad countries over the planet. You're gonna do that. What's Singapore doing to anyone? First of all, being well behaved. First of all, I think if you like if you're charismatic enough, and if you wear

a cool suit, and if you genuinely lay out a smart plan for your global takeover, that people can be like, you know, I look, I don't want to be taken over at all, but that doesn't look like that. One thing he said, I love that. And the thing about the pollution, he's like captain planet, except he murders. Like I'm kind of on board with this. That would be, I would, I would talk about cleaning the planet up ending the fossil fuels. I'd win a lot of the lefties that you're going to lose India. We don't want to clean this man is coming. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

you're going to lose India because that's my second stop after North Korea. All right. And they've already agreed they're worshiping me out there. And I'm just, you take care of India. You got Pakistan in that whole region being like, all right, this guy knows what's up. Or the inverse, You do the Pakistan. I think in phase one, you kind of keep the US in your back pocket, like, we're gonna co run planet, you know, me and the US, you know, you guys are good. I like, hey, I could work out of the White House, I can off. Give me the office next to yours,

Mr. President, you know what you should do that? No, no, no, the president and you tell him, sir, that's my chair. What you would actually. Chair. See, that's how you get. You'd have an internal council. And so this is the power thing. You would have your cool fortress of, not solitude, because you don't want to be a lonely weirdo, a fortress. And so Putin.

And the president of the US and Xi Jinping and all those guys, they have to come to you and then you convene with some sort of world council to the Pussy Palace. Could it be a boat? And then as the meeting is going, I parade as the meeting is going, Kyle, I will parade out for you the finest Norwegian pussies that have ever been seen.

Dude, you're the butthole inspector. No, that's for you. You gotta get out the best. No, I haven't been punished in this version. I'm the most astute. Like every day my job is to text Kyle three pictures of pristine Norwegian pussies and then he'll respond and be like tight. And I'm like, I know. And then what did Eminem say? If your pussy's not an any, then I'm out. He like, you gotta be out. That's your job.

You're my chief pussy inspector, or at least in the Baltic, not the Baltic region, the Nordic region. That would be that. We've got a promotion. He takes care of all of the Nordic states. That's my job. Yeah. Someone from some fucking bullshit southern country shows up.

I'm like, nah, not my job. At what point do I come in and I make it and Outlaw religion though. I think that's at least phase three cuz they're gonna They're gonna be mad about that in some regions. I'm thinking religion to what if you make a religion, but you declare yourself God, I don't like that. I want us to I'm moving toward I don't know easier to believe in you than a guy that never did anything if you that's what I'm saying It comes as it comes off as made up if you declare yourself God it almost makes you a week First of all, no, I'd have a great speech for that. I'd get some writers, of course

But you know something along the lines of like I am a god, but I don't want to be worshipped I want to rise you up so that you can all be gods like me We have to work together to evolve the human race. Like I don't have a little spiel like that. And what I'm really doing, I want Star Trek to be real. I want Star Trek to be like, and what a gay goal. I'm on board. He's right. It's a utopia. It's communism that works. Yes, yes, it is a fantasy. Yes. meritocracy, where everybody's working hard to better themselves and make the most of

meritocracy that works. Yes, it's real. And you'll get there. Yeah, it is real. When when all of a sudden there's no there's no resource scarcity. And they've eliminated that. Yes, something that can happen. I'm a superhero. I will eliminate resource scarcity and they've eliminated that. Yes, something that can happen. I'm a superhero, I will eliminate resource scarcity. How do you summon elements? How do you like summon? I will go to the asteroid belt. I will farm it myself.

Bring back that material here. Okay, cool. That just makes less people. Thank you. When I assemble my scroll. Can I give me some diamonds and rocky road. I'll be here. So I'll be while I'm servicing the most precious of things.

Norwegian. What is Xavier here has to think ahead and make sure you're not screwing up. If you're making this for space. What if your universe gets so advanced, they can build a weapon that actually hurts you. Oh, I put the kibosh on that right there right down. No, no, those phasers are set to stun. All right Calm down over there. Oh, you made real photon torpedoes. No, no, I didn't mean that real Let's just uh work on the engines for now You need to be careful because eventually germany's gonna get sick of it

They're gonna go nazi mode again, and then they're gonna invent some stasis ray where you're stuck. Taylor, I'm giving my opening speech. I'll be giving my opening global speech from the steps of the Reichstag, okay? Germany is coming back in a big way. I promise you. Where do you think I rule from? Where do you think my student power is but Berlin? All right, you're pretty cool. And I'm going to Russia and I'm'm going to get that Hitler skull and we're going to do a little research. No, Berlin is not the coolest city. You should lead from fucking, I don't know, something bullshit that would upset the rest of the world. Memphis.

I'd probably go to South Korea or Tokyo, one of those cyberpunk looking cities with all the neon skyscrapers and shit. But I don't know if you reach down to the poor nations and try to pull them up, or if I just go over and get rid of them. You know, which is better. You know, I think we both know the answer. You just got to... You feel about green belts then.

Areas of the planet where humans are not allowed to live, like around the equator, it's just all rainforest. Nobody really lives there. It's just there to make oxygen and balance the environment. I think algae is a lot better at making oxygen trees or trees should fucking suck for that. No, I don't like that. I'm going to take out the Amazon first day to that's like after North Korea and I want you to explore Antarctica, like apparently, like, you know, what's funny about the pronunciation of Harris's first name? I know that it's comma, law, like a comma punctuation point in the law, but Joe

Biden says it the way I say it. And he's the one I've always listened to. I found a montage of Joe Biden saying her name, like I say it next to her. And then like, look, like, not trying to begin political here, but can you imagine being the vice president and the little bit too old president can't get your name right on the stage in front of everybody when you're really trying to be all you could be up here and look like a pro team that would not, that would upset me. Like if the three of us went somewhere, he calls her a Kamala.

No, no, Kamala. He says Kamala. Her name is, her name is a little bit like the they pronouns, they, them pronouns. And by that I mean, like, it's kind of hard to get right. And some people get it right. Some people get it wrong because it's an honest accident. And some people get it wrong

because they're trying to other her, right? On Fox News, Donald Trump, they intentionally mispronounce her name her right? The Fox News, Donald Trump, they intentionally mispronounce her name, right? Donald Trump calls her Kambala, right? With a B slips in there. Um, that is where where's the beast slip in? I didn't hear it. It's near the end. It's Kamabala. Kamabala. He writes it's untrue social. Like it's not an ass. Like a fascia or something. And he's said it in no, no, he's an asshole. He says it in person He says it at the rallies and he types it on. Oh, is he trying to try to make her sound exotic?

Like kama blah blah blah like Barack Hussein obama is what he's trying to do. He's doing a barack He's trying to other her right and and like people who do pronouns Incorrectly on purpose. That's an asshole behavior, but there are also a lot of people who do pronouns incorrectly by accident, because it's hard. Yeah. And that's how I see it. It's a ridiculous thing you're being asked to do. Well, sometimes it is. Sometimes it's like, I mean, come on.

Like, how did you even know that's a sir? Yeah. Right, right. To me, it's probably the penis. If it's he and her, I get it right almost all the time. If it's they have a real hard time to guess. But most most sane people don't get offended when you screw it up the first time, like most the vast majority of the LGBT community just they're used to

that. It's not a big deal. Like a comma lobbying called Kamala, whatever. But then there's assholes in that community have a fucking meltdown or people that claim to be gender fluid and you're supposed to know just by looking and like judging on their body language and use the right pronoun of the right yeah that's a totally sane way to live yeah but yeah i don't care about pronouns but but um but but i think it's i just thought it was hilarious that joe was because that's right because when I mispronounce her name It's because that's how I've heard it or at least or at least that's how I hear it in my head

Yeah at the DNC what I'm really doing is I spell it when I when I say words I spell I picture the letters in my head and I read them out loud. That's what I'm doing At the DNC right now, obviously Overwhelmingly, they're saying Kamala's name, right? But they got it wrong three times So like it's a thing that well-meaning as it literally sounds better like when you see it Kamala like with like that sounds common or no more normal it's easier certainly easier for American accents or yeah English language sounds more direct and look hard. Kamala. It sounds like a, like a wrestling move or a judo. Kalima.

Kalima. Kamala. But at this point, if you're mispronouncing it all the time on purpose, you're kind of an asshole, right? I couldn't care less about the pronunciation of our political image. It's a way to like, I don't know, just not accept who she is. Oh, is it going to make Kamala Harris feel othered?

Who cares? They called him Trump for years. And it was also, it was also like no one calls retarded they call it orange they make fun of his spray tan it's mean and that's also like who's they are we talking about the hosts on cnn msbc abc cbs yeah drumph they call him no yes john that's what you're really you do and they don't call him drunk. No, we're way past that now. I'm saying back like 2016 to 2020.

That was a very common thing. And it's also a who gives a fuck. I don't care about Trump, a billionaire having his name messed up a little bit. Like I don't I don't care about that. That's ridiculous. He cares about that a lot. If he does, then who I don't care that he cares. You see, I saw the they were giving that kid a hard time because he cried

at the DNC. I didn't watch the DNC. But I guess what happened is the comma was vice president's son got up there and spoke. And I guess this little puffy fellow has a learning disability. No, no, no, no, no. He didn't speak. He was in the crowd watching his father speak. He is, he's nonverbal. And I guess he cried and said, that's my dad, which is weird on the nonverbal thing.

I don't know what his disability is. I think it means like non-conversational and he has ADHD. He's somewhere on mental health spectrum. It really sits like a lump on the log. He's neurodivergent in at least two ways. ADHD is like that. That's so like that. Obviously, but like nonverbal, that's not an ADHD thing. It's clearly something different, right?

And the kids, the kids are like cry face. He was like he was ugly crying and he was yelling at my dad or whatever. And they're giving a hard time on the Internet. You shouldn't give mentally challenged kids hard time. Yeah, I don't like that. But they know they didn't. Here's what I saw. I saw a Twitter interaction. I don't I don't know the names, apparently important people.

But one guy was making fun of the kid. The other person is like, hey, actually, he's got a learning disability and also this, that and the other. He's like, oh, shit, I'm sorry. I didn't know. Are we good? And then it's like, no, we're never going to be good now. He didn't know. Okay. If they were being bullies and then they realized, and then they stopped. Ann Coulter's full stop though. She don't get it. That was the best one. It was so funny. She's like, uh, she made fun of him for crying and be like,

I couldn't imagine having a relationship with a child like this That just cries and shows emotion something like really like you think bear. She said do you think baron trump cries? Never yes. Yes, and the number one Reply was like this quote from wikipedia. She's been engaged so many times but never married It's like man your previous fiancés might have something to say about this or what was it? It was like maybe this is why you can't even have children because you can't get a partner. Do you know what do you know what Ann Coulter gets right that we can all agree on?

Waking. Yes, I nailed it. 100%. I like a nice thin woman. They call her scarecrow on the left. Look at it. Joseph, show us a flattering picture of Ann Coulter, please, Zach, because I would say that- I don't think she's a beauty, but she's definitely thin, which is cool. I was introduced to her online whenever Romney was running against Obama. She was big in the political scene at the time.

I thought she was pretty hot. You know, that was like 12 years ago, something like that. Maybe she was. I didn't remember. Man, man, you got very different penises then. May have. She keeps her body fat in check. And I give people a pass for getting old. I mean, who doesn't? Yeah. I mean, as you get older, it probably becomes easier. That coming in the flattering picture. Thank you, Zach. That picture's a decade old. She looks like she's about to peck me. Yeah.

You don't have to believe these, you know, as Woody would agree, ugly people should have good BMIs also. Even if you're a weird kind of witchy woman, this is the kind of woman you'd think was a witch. I thought it was pretty easy not to make fun of Tim Walz's kid, even if you didn't know he's neurodivergent, because he's under 18.

I've always left those kids off limits. Yeah, it's weird when they do that. Remember when Ted Cruz tried to kiss his daughter to show his like, hey, we're a big family here. We love each other. They're outside of a bus. I think it's his bus, his tour bus. And doing one in press stops, Ted Cruz here. And he goes like smooches like 12 14 year old daughter on like the cheek and she reacted the same way my dog reacts when I try to kiss him. It was like, like, like, like recoiled.

That relationship is so toxic. I think the daughter has tried to kill herself two or three times. She even gets on social media and talk shit about her dad. She said she was by and her dad was a monster that like wants to put down like just talking mad shit about him. And she has talked about like she feels trapped in her home and she wants to leave and she's trying to kill herself. Are you sure that wasn't the the Kellyanne Conway people? No, Kellyanne Conway was the Bowling Green massacre. There's something happened like

Ted Cruz's daughter attempted suicide. No, she, Kellyanne Conway and her husband. Was Trump's campaign manager too. They had a big split. They had a big split. They had a big so publicly or something like that. Yeah, they divorced. And her daughter would have these like she'd go live and talk to her. She'd live stream her fights with Kellyann Conway who was like on the news every night at that point. And I think it ended with like some underage nudes of the daughter online and a whole thing. Wild. Yeah, there was a big one on that. The funny one. I keep my ear to those, uh, uh, moms for Liberty lady,

moms for Liberty in Florida. Uh, you know, the people that want book bands and get rid of gay books broadly, stuff like that. The president, the woman who founded moms for Liberty is married to the head or the chair of the Republican Party in Florida. And he got arrested and charged with entrapment and I think a variety of sex crimes because the two of them would stalk women to determine which is the prettiest women to have a three-way with. And this was a wholly different crime because he would take pictures of women in private

places without their consent and like text them to his wife like, hey, is this one good for a gang bang or whatever. So they were pretty frequently engaging in homosexual sex despite trying to get those books banned. But where this goes off the fucking rails, okay, there's nothing wrong with having a threesome now and then. This guy invited one of these women to come have a threesome with him and his wife. She shows up, the wife isn't there.

It's just him and he looks like he's one drink away from like liver cancer, big fat beer belly probably smells like whiskey, not a pleasant looking guy. Woman shows up and says, you know, I really wasn't here for this. I was going to like kind of deal with you. I really want to position wife or whatever. And she tries to leave. He says no. And he like stops her and beats her and tries to force himself on no. And he stops her and beats her and tries to force himself on her. And he gets hit with, I believe, a rape and an imprisonment charge.

He had to step down from being the head of the Republican party in Florida. His wife was originally getting no charges because she was just off. She wasn't there for this. But then investigators discovered that he sent her a shit ton of text messages of pictures of women that probably like not in public, not in places they would have consented to being

filmed and stuff. So there's like this weird like wiretapping kind of charge or like a spying thing going on. It was fucking wild. But it was hilarious. The pictures were like covert nudes? No, they weren't like covert nudes. It's like he would go to a, like a bar or club or like a convention and just like take pictures of, of, of women not paying attention. Hey, should I ask this one out? Shad, do you like this one's ass? Can we, this one's got good titties, stuff like that. Oh, okay.

I didn't know that was illegal. Uh, well, if you're not sometimes being in a private space and the rules change a little bit, it's different when you're on the street, like at a public event. Uh, So I'm not super sure about all that, but there is an additional charge with that. And the ironic thing is, between these two people, they were fighting very hard to get immoral books banned, especially books about homosexual sex. And they're engaging in non-medical non-sexual sex. Just to be in good faith in it, were they trying to ban those books

outright or just keep them out of access of children? I think that's one of those things where like if you look at what they say, they would probably say keep it out of access of children. But when you be real about what they would ask for, how hard they would push, or how wild things would get, it would be pretty obvious there would be a push to get rid of them. Did they try to ban them off Amazon or out of children's libraries? Out of libraries in general, out off amazon or out of children's libraries uh out of libraries in general out of colleges out of schools um it's kind of like like okay like how a democrat would

say you know i don't believe in banning guns but i think there should be you know stricter gun control and if you capitulate to that they'll roll it out to something very extreme that is essentially a gun ban basically that same kind of attitude toward those books. I don't think they would ban it for adults. There's like, like, fucking a third of the Republican party has to be gay. Yeah. Like they're all doing a bunch of nonsense behind the scenes. But I totally am in favor of not putting those books in front of kids. This is one of those right-wing things I'm so on board with because the left will be like, no, no, they want to, they hate

gays so much. They don't want anyone to be gay. They don't want anyone to know what it is. They say, no, we genuinely, genuinely don't give books that instruct my eight year old how to suck a dick of his of his friend. Don't don't put those in his library. I want I want to teach him about sex myself because I'm his prep parent and just like his religious teaching I don't want the fucking Ten Commandments on his on his wall either new words that Louisiana just did that Texas that either but I think you're leading to sit to pretend that the Republicans are only trying to keep it out of the eyes

And arms of children right it w tried to make it a constitutional amendment to have gay marriage illegally What year is it? Yes. Right. That wasn't that long ago. But Obama wouldn't. Obama wouldn't. Remember where the left was back then on gay marriage?

The left was further right than the Republicans now back then. The left was not further right than the Republicans in W's time. The left in W's time were against gay marriage. Obama was the one that let gays serve in the military. The left and W's time were against gay marriage. Obama was the one that let gays serve in the military. Clinton is the one that put don't ask don't tell. They said that abortion should be, you know, rare and rare. That's Obama's.

We're talking about gay people. I don't know. Yeah, we can explain this. What about issues on general and like touching points? The idea that like the Democrat democrat like obama's social position you're arguing that republicans are more for gay rights than democrats no i'm saying that i'm very clearly stating that obama in 2008 was more right wing on things like abortion and gay marriage than the republicans even are now outside of a handful of them

like that march of no way obama No way. Obama was thoroughly moderate. Who's trying to get rid of gay marriage? Bro, in text, at the DNC, they had like some 12-year-old girl from Kentucky. They got raped by her stepdad that was forced to give birth. Obama wasn't on that train in 2008. Are you smoking crack? Obama said that abortion should be legal and rare. And now the current Democratic position is like it should be legal and rare. And now the current democratic position is like, it should be a celebrated thing.

He also said that abortion is something between, really? It is, he's right. He is not right. No one's saying abortion should be a celebrated thing. Yes, they are. Absolutely, they are. I mean, I'm sure you can find some Whackadoo at a parade and fucking chaps that might say that, but that is not the

No, I've seen Democratic speakers take the stage and say, it's great to be here in San Francisco, the city where I had my first abortion, and the crowd goes wild. They're like, yeah, your first one right here. I've literally never seen this. I'd love to see it. Show it to me. I feel like maybe you're taking some like wacko off to the side. I don't take Marjorie Taylor Greene and pretend that she's the mainstream of the Republican party.

I mean, she gets voted in every year. She's, you know, she represents a lot of Republicans. She's the mainstream of Lavonia, but I don't. I mean, like her and. No, that's not their district. That's a different district. That's a different district. All right, but like I look at Trump

as the leader of the Republican party. And right now I like I look at Trump as the leader of the Republican Party. And right now I look at Harris or Biden as the leader of the Democratic Party. And they're not celebrating this stuff. They're not up there saying that abortion should be a really good thing. They're saying they should be rare and legal. They certainly don't say it should be rare. Like that's just not a thing that's said among mainstream Democrats anymore. That is the position of Democrats forever

And still the words that you think in 2024 the position of democrats is that abortion? Is a thing that should be very rare Yeah, I do and they're saying that the unplanned pregnancies are always bad people who have abortions and everything goes like right It's still a traumatic event That's true. That's just not in line with what they speak and how they- They probably speak differently

because they're having to fight tooth and fucking nail to maintain that right, because the Republicans would happily make children that get raped by their parents give birth. How about we get rid of, we allow abortions in that instance, but as a whole, we don't allow it. Would you be okay? That would be a lot less bad, but that's not what's on the menu right now. So that so you would be amicable, like you'd be agreeable to that, like getting rid of abortion

in terms of convenience. I always feel like arguing these corner cases are like, so both sides do this thing that frustrates me. The Republicans and and I'll get to the Democrats too, the Republicans pretend that people are having like abortions in the ninth month. Donald Trump literally goes up in his rallies and say they birth the babies, they take them out and they put a knife in their skull and do like a nine and a half month abortion.

He says two weeks after they're born, they abort the kid. That's bullshit. The Democrats act like abortion is mostly in the case of rape incest and health of the mother. I think we should all just tell the truth and be like, mostly this is about people who had it, who got pregnant and don't want kids. And the question is, should we force parents who don't want their children to keep them? And Taylor phrases that as a convenience thing. But really, we're talking about kids who are going to be probably neglected and mistreated by their parents. They're not financially

capable of having children. It's going to be an unsuccessful broken home. And do you think those homes should have children? I don't think that the alternative is killing the kids. I think that's wrong. I have right Do you know Planned Parenthood set up outside the DNC right now giving free abortion pills and vasectomies out? No, they're giving out vasectomies Yes, well because they all have surgery right there outside the DNC of a sectomy surgery. They're giving them out. They celebrate abortion and yes, it is true. Planned Pairing is like 5% of its money on abortion services and 95% of it on

free reproductive healthcare stuff for poor people. No, that's not the money they spent. It's the, uh, procedures they perform. And they isolate a lot of those. They do. Yes. And when they say that 5% of their abortion of their procedures are abortions, what they're doing is they're counting a lot of little things as additional procedures. I saw that too. And I used to believe that.

Whoa, there's a hold up. Yeah, it's almost seems celebratory, right? This whole website is about abortion. This is a bullshit source. There's a truck outside the DNC. I'm like, I'll get another source. Like every one of these things is like trashing the Democrats and abortion. If you get to do my little searching, too,

I'm just imagining somebody set up a Here's PBS. Here's PBS. Oh, okay. And it's funny they try to frame at the beginning they're like are they're giving out free abortions at the DNC? Donald Trump says so. Here's a fact check. We're uh we're giving out abortion pills and performing the secretary's department line. Fact check just triggered Bill Clinton went up there and he said in the last 16 years, America's made 51 million jobs, 50 under democratic presidents and one under Republican.

Real quick. He's like, hold on. He's like, I had to fact check that three times and it's true. So I was like, God, I need to fact check it too. True. In the last 20 years, 16, 16. 16. Okay. Well, there's been one president that's Republican. I think we're counting Reagan Bush. And it happens during. Maybe it's 20 then I could check it out. Yeah, because it also happened during COVID where we

lost all the jobs. Certainly a realistic stat there. But we were talking about like the, the abortion being lauded as like a good thing. And Kyle just came up with a concrete example of it happening concurrently right now at the DNC. So are you saying that doesn't happen and that's not an opposition of theirs? I don't think it's a celebratory thing. Even the article you linked, there was a guy talking about how he's already had three kids and he can't afford anymore. So getting a vasectomy made sense, but he couldn't even afford the vasectomy.

So now the free vasectomy van is somehow a good offer for him. And I think that Democrats want they're giving out abortion pills out front of the DNC. Yes. And you're saying that that's not advocating and celebrating that. And I say that's the after bills. By the way, it was since 1989, 51 million jobs. Cause there's a movement right now to ban those pills completely so that nobody can get them anywhere regardless of circumstances.

Well, that's not gonna go that far. Yeah, this is like a DNC counterculture push. How about I give two or three? I agree with Woody. If you read the book Freakonomics, which was written by some fantastic economists, they, I think quite correctly, posit that the crime wave of the 80s and early 90s, the Robocop era craziness, was because

abortion was illegal in the 50s, 60s, and some part of the 70s. So women were forced to have a bunch of children that they didn't want to have, they weren't financially prepared for. There was a bunch of kids that were neglected, abused, and not good for shit. And when that happens, crime rates in the society fucking skyrocket. I mean, like Robocop was supposed to predict the future because crime rate was just going up like fucking infinitely. And then suddenly it stops and it curves back down. And that tracks almost exactly with when parents had abortion rights

and would then abort kids that they couldn't afford or didn't want. With less unwanted kids, crime goes down. Yeah, it's wrong to kill kids. Correlation isn't causation, but interesting, black women have five times as many abortions as men. And you're saying when there were no abortions,

that we had a massive crime wave. Well, it's racist and it's also wrong to abort. Are you telling me abort racist? Aborting any baby is wrong. Like you're killing. What about Hitler baby? Well, you don't know what he's gonna be until. We know though.

All right, it's got. Taylor's pro Hitler. That's what I'm getting from this. Well, how about this? How about we let him in art school and shit works out. What about an ectopic pregnancy? Yeah, if it's for the life of the mother, 100%. Like you should be able to baby is horribly disfigured and deformed and will be born without eyes in their head. And they're going to live for about 48 hours and suffer unimaginable pain.

No matter what the fuck you do. Yeah. yeah. And I think that's a good example of a time where it might be necessary, or where it is necessary, because that baby's going to die outside the womb. And it would be a traumatic, horrible experience for that mother to have to give birth to a dead baby dying baby. But what he correctly pointed out earlier is these examples you're using are not representative of the overall issue. And so that's where I'll use a more real one then. Okay. Let's say there's a chicken college. Two people have sex and they have a couple people have sex.

Some woman in college, she's working on a, I don't know, a science degree. Let's be real generous and progressive here. She gets knocked up at a party. Okay. And she's like, fuck, I have like a semester and a half left. A girl in no advice. If I cannot go to college, I can't go to college and have this baby. I won't get my degree.

I will go to college. She has to kill her kid, I guess. Oh, no, you have to go work. Minimum wage jobs is a fucking wage slave for your whole life and struggle to take care of a kid that has no opportunities. There are infinite programs. You can abort the baby before it's fully formed. Get her fucking degree.

Go be rich. And then in a couple of years, become a good mom that can provide a family. No, there shouldn't be abortion because it ruins her plans. For a frat party. That's ridiculous. Being the aborted baby and moving on to a frat party. You don't get to go to levels. OK, well, then even if it's even if it's for a pretty dishonest response. OK, I'll give an honest answer.

Prioritizing your fictional career at that point over the life of a baby you just made is wrong. That's an honest answer. That's wrong. And it's immoral. And it's killing a child. So that's my position on that. Yeah, I think it's 100% wrong.

Bah, that kid doesn't even know he's a kid. Imagine when he gets to level two in the game and he doesn't have any XP and he's sitting there like, I don't know, I was killed in four fucking months in the womb. Yeah, he was fucking spawn cam. And they're like, damn, those kids come back as dogs. That's what they don't tell you. It's like, it's like in Sonic, every time they get a bunch of rings. Every time they get squishing a bunch of rings. Yeah, yeah. My favorite part about that discussion was at least it was like the real case, right? Like here's a girl in college who's just not prepared to have a kid right now. And you know, yes or no, she's not going to have a good life.

This kid probably won't have a good life. Now she's saddled with this single mother problem and what's the right way to go? Yeah, it's still like the- They're well-meaning people on both sides of that. I'll tell you a real story from somebody I know. I'm not gonna name their name because that's wrong, friend of mine.

I got him, man, I hope I won't. Especially my wife, hope I'm not going too far off. This woman had a boyfriend in high school. They were not responsible. They grew up in a pissant town in the south that had 4,000 people, Bible thumping, no sex education, nothing going on, everybody dumb as fuck, no jobs. You know the thing. Of course, she got knocked up her junior year while her boyfriend was driving drunk and he flipped his truck and he fucking died. driving drunk and he flipped his truck and he fucking died. And there she is pregnant with a baby, dead boyfriend living in a small town with zero jobs, like half the people plus are

on benefits here, you're going nowhere. She decides to abort this baby. And it was a horrible, traumatic experience that gave her real PTSD that she struggled with for years and damaged her reproductive So it was harder a lot of money went on a fucking journey through life a rough one with some ups and downs but years later met a very nice man his friend of mine as well and They eventually moved to a different place. They both got much higher paying jobs wanted a university wanted a dispensary Managing the dispensary so a little bit better.

They got a nice income and she got pregnant again and gave birth to a beautiful little baby girl. And now that they've got money and they're stable, they're raising this girl, I've been there and visited, they're teaching her things, they're good parents, they're a little hippie dippy, you know the type, but wholesome, they're a part of their kids' lives, the kid's well adjusted.

What do you think the outcome would have been if she had kept the baby of her dead boyfriend in the podunk town and went to work at the McDonald's to get just enough money to pay for diapers while staying at her mom's house? I think you're making a lot of assumptions in that leading question you asked. And then the only concrete thing other than the leading question is the only thing we can know 100% that's different is that baby's dead. That's the only thing. That's true. That baby was going to do great things. And that is wrong. That was going to be the next Kamala Harris. Absolutely. I agree with Kyle here. Could have been. Could have been. The next president. With extraordinary improbability, you're talking lotteries here. And the problem with abortion isn't in, in that particular instance, killing

the baby can be wrong in a moral framework, say I agree with you. But then you have to look at society as a whole, like all of America. And if everybody makes that choice, why should it's like Robocop again, there's a whole bunch of stupid people with parents who don't love them doing God knows what out there. Why should that child be deprived life? Because of the financial, you know, who knows insecurity of a parent. Like you, the idea that, oh, they wouldn't make as much money as they wanted and they wouldn't be able to do as much right away. So we better just kill the baby. Like that's, that's ridiculous. And I used to be pro choice, like, and it was, and I realized it was entirely out of my own selfish idea of convenience that if I ever knocked a girl out that I did not want to have a baby with that I could just be like,

Oh, well, I'm glad this is a thing. And then in recent years, it's been a thing of like, Holy shit, how have I ever been okay with this? Like this is so obviously wrong to make a decision that leads to a child and then to prioritize your own fiscal health over that of an actual living person. That's how I feel about chocolate. Chocolate's great, I love chocolate.

Chocolate's mostly farmed by those slave boys though, those literal slaves being forced to like pick the, you know, the chocolate beans or wherever chocolate comes from. It's one of God's great mysteries. No one knows where chocolate comes from. Some say it comes out of the ground. But you know, I still eat chocolate and, you know, I don't care.

I don't want you to eat chocolate, though. So I'm also from that that position of selfishness. I wish abortions cost call it six thousand. All right. You have almost none in that. Yeah. Oh, shit. They cost more than that. What are you talking about? I paid for a couple of years depends on how late, of course, but abortions are expensive. No, they are not

I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna Google this and see how wrong I am here. Yeah, so wrong. They're four or five hundred dollars I'm cut I line up with drifter and they're like they're like plasma TVs cheaper every year And it comes from an idea of like I I had oh five date hiring to be morally right in the same way that Taylor is Aspiring to be morally right like, you know, where do we have a better world, a better country, a better universe, one where these Yeah, unwanted kids get put into what are likely subpar families. It's my take on it. But I can see how a well meaning person would land in the same place Taylor does, which is like, look, a kid in a subpar family is better than a dead kid. Like, yeah, yeah. The dead kids are like, I don't take it. I don't take it.

My patients in my like, in equal sense to Woody, like he's British. Woody is not the kind of person that celebrates abortion as a wonderful thing. Like you also are trying to come to a good conclusion in the way you see it. And so I don't see it as malicious or evil or anything like that. The way like someone who actively celebrates that I would see as evil. And also, I just really don't like it. I still think that like, especially in this country, like the whole idea is it doesn't really matter where you start, you know, like, I grew up in one of them shitty towns too.

And like, regardless of the town, some people did, did well and became doctors and lawyers and scientists and shit. And some people did the other thing, you know? So, so like starting from shitty beginnings can really toughen you up and make you a driven, hardworking individual, you know? Yeah. That's the exception and not the rule. That's true.

Well, yeah, exactly. But those those, you know, the rules also get to live a life. Right. But do you make your decisions based on exceptions? I guess sometimes we all do. I mean, you were kind of trying to earlier with the whole like incest and like deformed baby. I was talking about the morality. I'll agree with you.

I'm not, I don't think abortion should be celebrated. I don't think it's fun. I don't think people should like getting an abortion. I think when you do that, you have to come to terms with the fact that you ended a human life for some reason, some benefit to yourself or society that you think is worth it. But the reason I brought up those examples is because those are the examples that the current Republican Party is pushing.

Don't word it that way to states. I'll word it however the fuck I want. You just admitted it's a human life that you're killing. It is a human life that they're killing. Your side doesn't admit that ever. That's like their no-no part. I'm not on a fucking side. I get stuck on the left-wing side because I'm not,

if you're not like sucking Trump's dick right now, you might as well be a communist as far as the split in this country goes. But the reality is that the modern Republican party in many states does not allow for exceptions of rape, incest, danger to the mother, deformed babies. All of that shit is just completely off the table. We're not even at a point where we're discussing. Where? Texas, where I live. Really? No, yeah. The point is that you're not

being honest in your investment of it because if they made those niche cases that you're addressing totally fine, you still wouldn't be okay with that ruling, which is why I'm saying that it's not an honest assessment of the issue. I would be more okay with it. I wouldn't be as concerned because there's a difference between this pregnancy is going to kill both the child and the mother, and I'm not ready to be a mother. There's a difference there that I could work with and live around and make sense and has a moral framework, but that's not the fucking reality that I could, you know, work with and live around and make sense and has a moral

framework. But that's not the fucking reality that I'm living in right now in Texas. Just so you guys know, I'm a goddamn genetic freak. Okay. I got my genes tested. I don't actually have any genetic disorders that I'm aware of, but I'm a recessive carrier for everything. Horrible, fucked up shit. The stuff I was talking about the kids born with no skulls. I'm a carrier for that. Horrible, fucked up shit. The stuff I was talking about, the kids born with no skulls. I'm a carrier for that. My geneticist sat me down, looked me right in the eye and told me, do not get your wife pregnant until you get her tested too, or make sure that these recessive genes will show up because it will be horrible. What? And if I do that in the state of Texas, and I'm unlucky, and my wife is going to give birth to some Frankenstein baby that might kill her, I don't have other options.

I have to send her to the hospital and wait for her to go fucking septic and be on life support to get a surgery that will then kill her and the baby that wasn't going to live anyway. That's the reality I'm living with here in Texas. And people in other states are dealing with that. Texas and people in other states are dealing with that. We're not Frankenstein. We're like, we're like way Beyond talking like morality and like convenience here. We're not I don't know. I'm rambling. I'm getting mad It's a thousand dollars that solves the whole thing that way we can pop in have one if we need to no biggie But you know all the others can't and they won't be so many, you know, and I I like that I like when the punishment for a crime is money You know and I like that I like when the punishment for a crime is money I don't like it because it makes the families most capable of having the kid the one that doesn't have to and

That to me makes sense Because who should have those most capable of having them No, anyone should be able to have a family not everyone's bullshit. I know he's telling you silly thing There are so many What are you talking about yeah, how Julie does not give Sign outside where those places with a fetus on it. And then the next day I take my girlfriend there. So Kyle, I have a question. When I had like my screws removed from my bones and such,

they let me keep that hardware. Do you have any like dead fetus souvenirs? Oh. No? No. Oh, that's out of bounds? What do you think that Jack? Oh, no, it's not out of bounds.

I didn't. No, they threw all the toe bones away. I wanted a toe bone necklace, but they said no How'd we get grim? Well, anyway, you gotta wait of a ninth month to get those toe bones. That's when they calcified I think we've really got to the bottom of it here and solved a lot of stuff Look you put me in charge of the world give me my homelander for skills and and I promise you I don't think a lander can do it by the way. I don't think he's powerful enough.

No, he's why I say that. He's what he can do against like earth weapons. But I've seen him like suffer from horrible pain in a burning room, right? Superman can survive the power of the sun directly, right? Homelander can barely take flames from the walls. He saw. But they don't have him. They've stabbed him in the ear with a piece of metal

and he started bleeding like it wasn't even that big a piece of metal. That's a good point that you can see in the air making believe that that's kind of fucked up. I think he's strong enough to get the job done because he could be surgical. I don't think he needs to like do war with the war machines and the missiles and the planes and everything. I think he just kind of do a surgical strike and like take out the presidents and the leadership and force them to do what he do what he wants maybe

Cuz like like if he's not gonna show up on the battlefield and be like, alright, what's your biggest weapon? Which ones first like he's not gonna do that Omni-man thing which is the Omni-man was like hit me with whatever you got like oh really? That's cool. Omni-man is like Superman. He's a bad motherfucker. He doesn't he doesn't even need to block most of the time. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Well, this has just been fun. I love the abortion talk. I can't wait to share some of these anecdotes with my family and friends later on about abortion. I think we'll have a good rousing discussion. Pick up where we left off here. And Drifter, where can everyone find you?

All you YouTube.com slash Drifter, but that insanely is maybe not even my main thing. I'm growing rapidly on TikTok and shifting away from gaming towards science and mostly like pop science kind of fun tech content. So TikTok is popping off. I think I'm Drifter TV on TikTok. So I'm not really promoting or pushing it.

I'm letting it grow organically and that's working better. Cool. Well, anyone out there check out Drifter TV on TikTok and also regular Drifter on YouTube, check his stuff out. And I'm glad you're doing seemingly much better. Thank you. Next time I come back, I'm gonna try to be in the regular chair for like hour, hour and a half.

Oh, we're gonna have you at a walking desk next time. I ran away. I have a little treadmill I thought about putting down there, but no, it's things are a lot better. And the most important part is the trend is really good. Thank God. Good. Very glad to hear. It's not where you are. It's where you're trending. PKA 714.