Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #234

Episode Date: June 24, 2015

This week on PKA, the cast and crew is joined by the BEST and most AMAZING Civilization V multiplayer player in all the world! The guys crack wise about Filthy's education when it comes to the Autoblow 2 sponsorship this show and we hate on some Fat People and get a little philosophical on the matter.

We're live! Painkiller Already, episode 234. Here we go. This episode of Painkiller Already is being brought to you by Dollar Shave Club. Keeping your face nice and smooth while keeping food on our tables. We appreciate if you'd support them. And, uh, we have a very special guest tonight. We've got Filthy Robot on the show. And we've been talking about him a lot lately. Chiz and I have been playing tons of Civ, as everyone knows.

And we've been watching Filthy's videos. And I noticed Chiz sent me some notes here. Chiz is pretty good. I feel like I'm stern over here. I've got some notes about you. It says here that you are a sexual sociology or sexual social psychology major or something like that. I have a master's in psychology and kind of an emphasis in intimate relationships,

which also involves sexual relationships. Okay, well then I'm glad we've got you on the show because tonight we're going to talk about male sex toys a bit because our other sponsor is Autoblow. The Autoblow. It's fun, but I think you might be more of an expert at this than I am. Oh, please, your fucking name is Filthy Robot. Tell me more about how you don't understand me. my own filthy robot here um but but the auto blow is uh is something that

all right so here's the deal i feel like women um really get a pass here uh you know every woman who's got a vibrator you know you would never make fun of a woman who has a vibrator you're like empowering kyle right yeah totally yeah she's got woman who has a vibrator. That's empowering, Kyle. Right? Yeah, totally. Yeah, she's got a pocket rocket, a vibrator, a dildo, whatever she may have. Magic wand. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You would never think ill of a woman who had a sex toy. Your mom probably has a sex toy. But a guy who has a sex toy, a blow-up doll or like a pocket pussy as some people call it,

you know, something like that, you kind of look down and you're like, oh, what? You need that thing? Why don't you just use your hand and you're like, oh, what, you need that thing? Why don't you just use your hand? It's like, it's completely unproportional. So later on tonight, we're going to be talking about the autoblow, and I think it's going to be interesting. It's going to be awesome. Yeah.

Hey, quick note, there's a link in the description to the autoblow 2 video. They wanted me to show it, but it's really not safe for YouTube. Quite risque. It's quite risque. There are some almost like medical diagrams of vaginas and then some not cartoon drawings because that makes them seem more fun, but there's some hand-drawn vaginas in the video and such. So click on that if that's what you're looking to see. If it's not what you're looking to see, then don't be surprised.

A lot of lunch meat innuendo but they're holding a contest and they want to see i guess the world's prettiest vagina and then take a 3d model out of it and make like a host of sleeves that people might be going to send one to me and i'm gonna fuck it so really get on board with this thing. Let's make this happen. Yes, I might just, you know, take a photo of my rear end and see if this works out, right? It could happen. Shut up, Miles. I can never see your ass is not going to win the prettiest vagina

contest. No, but perhaps if you're really tight with these sponsors, they would make you a special sleeve of his ass. Now we're talking. A PKA special. Right? People at home can sit there and be like, you know what, I'm more in a Kyle mood.

Pull it out. Slide it back in. And you know that they worked all the kinks out because it's the Autoblow 2. You're not an early adopter. You're getting the quality. I felt very safe the whole time that I was doing my product testing I gotta say it's a real work of art what they've done there but we'll

get to that later how many times have a product tested um it's hard to keep count really you know it's early would that be accurate many times many times i i've done i've done thorough product testing i think i think that would be uh the way to put it yes outstanding outstanding unlike kyle i've tested the very deep end of it and it's just as good as the top oh it is yes it's good to know for all of our viewers obviously because they watch yeah especially the Patreon members so your

education is very impressive and that's one of the reasons we thought that you were interesting could you list out your accomplishments for us because I want to like preface that I want to get to that before we talk about your streaming and what you do online.

My accomplishments? Yeah, yeah. What are you doing in school, where you're going, what you're up to there? All right. So I have a bachelor's in psychology. I also have a master's in psychology from Northern Illinois University. I think I am now at three or four published papers, one of which I'm first author on that is in the process of being published and a number of second author publications as well. But I mean, I don't know how any of this is relevant to bringing me on to talk about SIF. But sure, let's talk more about that if you like.

It is relevant. How can psychology not be relevant to SIF? I'm sorry, Kyle. You want to jump in? Go right ahead. Yeah, no. I'll take your input on this, because I think they'll differ. I know that Kyle in particular, when he plays Civ, lying and salesmanship are a big part of the way

that he plays. He will talk you into doing things that aren't in your best interest. You almost want to be part of his religion during the game. I'm not sure it would work on Filthy, but this is a big thing, and he'll say, oh, no, that army amassing at your border, it's strictly defensive.

Pay no attention to them, you'll be fine. The bad thing is, both those last things you listed were total truths. My religion was, I had gotten first religion, so I had tithe and a couple other things, and your Roman Empire was going wide. I was like, ah, Woody would like tithe. He could use this. He doesn't need whatever other lesser tenant you picked.

And my religion truly was the best bet for you. And those units really, you know, I wanted to hit you with artillery. I didn't want to hit you with those crossbows. They were just there hanging out to make sure you didn't do any funny business. Of course. Why would you want to do that? See, he's doing it right now. He's doing it right now and everybody's believing him.

I have to say, I mean, that's one of the things i enjoy most about the free-for-alls i mean we play you can play civ as a teamers game you can play civ as a 1v1 game you play this as a single player game but i like the social interaction that goes along with the free-for-alls it's a balancing act you're never you know even no matter how good you are at the game you're never going to be on top all the time every single time so it's a balancing act of how do i play my opponents against each other, as well as playing the game to the best degree that I can to get ahead in that. So I really enjoy that. I totally understand that. Early on, I watched

a save, I forget which one it was, attack you in today's stream. And you killed him. And you're like, let this be a lesson. Let this sink in. I'm glad that we're streaming this. This is a lesson for the stream. If you attack me, you die. Yeah, I think that's a really good persona to have on there right like you know um it was interesting uh dr chis today like he backstabbed someone and it's a it tends to be a really uh one-off strategy you can get

away with in the community community is small enough that you play with people a lot over and over again you tend to get a sense of the style of players playing and if you play for the player backstabs you that works once right The first time someone backstabs me, it tends to work because you don't expect it. It's betrayal. And then the next time you go, I can't trust the fucking thing this guy says to me. He wants a Lux trade?

No, I'm going to kill him. He wants to scout my lands? Yeah, we'll let him do that for five turns and then I'll kill him. So it kind of goes like that a little bit. I do that all the time. If these guys come close to me, I go to war. And they're like, what?

It was just a scout. You're really making a big deal out of nothing It's true screw you all no you you've never got Don't even come around here. It's war Yep, build a persona right like I mean as part of it like especially if you're a visible member of the community and your streamers You get you know you get team the streamer comes up all the time right though. Oh, no he's gonna win He's the biggest threat. Let's just all rush him with crossbows right you know so the kind of mentality i want to be perceived as and it's going to be long-term beneficial for me is fuck with me i'll spend the rest of my game killing you and that tends to barely affect it and it's not just that

either it's it's not just that it's killed the streamer it's you often seem to be the best guy in the game like are there online rankings like like is there any way to say who is the best multiplayer guy or at least is the best multiplayer guy or at least the best multiplayer guy in your Steam group? The group as a whole has experimented with rankings before. We've done actually ranked play for a while and the biggest problem with that is that

the scoring system tends to be a big pain in the ass. We haven't figured out the optimal scoring method because what you tend to get is you get people playing for second or third where they're very clearly not playing to win and we'll admit that if you push them to that they're trying to get you know for example i've had a game where i was a highest ranked player in that game so like fourth through like second we're like well even if we don't win if we we come in third and second in this game it can get filthy to fifth we get more points from this so i see we tried the ranking

thing it didn't work out so well we don't have an optimal solution for that. But you can too if you're in the community for a long enough time period get a sense of who the really good players are. Did you get a vibe for Chiz? I'm calling him Dr. Chiz. Did you get a vibe for Chiz? For Chiz? I didn't get enough time to play with him. He seemed to do

okay. His demos were kind of midway through that. I think at some point in the stream today I kind of mentioned I really wanted to meet him in the game because I can't see his demos in the game until I've met him. And I wanted to get a sense of what type of player he is. I haven't played with him enough. All the players in that game actually were new to me. But when I play with the regulars,

I have a very strong, I have a very good sense of who's really good in this game and who isn't, and then who to watch out for. So how do you rank yourself personally? You know, you can't be like the top player or the the top five players there's too many players doing it right there's a lot of really really good players you tend to kind of rank them in tiers this is a really good player this is a fairly good player this is an average like that so yeah and you're in the top

tier clearly i'm up there yeah for sure i play too much not to be how many hours do you have someone was saying you're threatening 4 000 hours now now. Is that right? I could check real quick, but it's probably not that. Jesus Christ. I say you need like 10,000 hours to perfect woodworking or something. So you're like halfway to perfecting being a blacksmith in Civ. I think I'm probably pushing Kyle's time with the product at this point. Not even close, Filthy. Not even close. I guess I should check to see how much I have as well i know it's nowhere near i could check yeah let's check real quick i think my

daughter has about 500 hours i don't know what i have so how much do you play every single day filthy so um i'm currently trying full-time streaming um and i stream primarily civ with some x-com i do i stream five days a week and I play Civ generally about four although I'm kind of slacking a little bit right now playing a little bit more XCOM kind of getting into that and I'm waiting on the next version of the and the no quitters mod that we're playing with so I'm kind of in between my Civ fix right now so yeah probably on average about four times a day four times a week so how does the no quitters mod change civ oh my god it's

it's hundreds of changes like we could go through it but it would take forever um basically what it's trying to do is it's trying to do away with uh tradition being the dominant strategy and there being a very set tech path in multiplayer so the goal is to give options and social policies an option and tech path um and it's combined also with uh there's a no quitters map out there and the map does away with a lot of the isolation problems that the original Pangea map has. So there's a lot more human interaction needed because you're much closer to the other civs around you. And it makes this for a much, much better game. It's really cool.

As I watch you, I guess I'm a sim city-er. I prefer war to really start when Mus musketmen you know start getting developed and uh i'm not the player that you are but uh i was like man you know this is it's all early game ambush stuff it's all you know knights and crossbows and spearmen and things like that if i still have spearmen i don't even want to be making an army yet you know i still want to be sim citying so i don't think i would fit i think you'll find as you play that the game um i really like civ as a game where the technologies come in the kind of the larger scheme of things being that these are hostile players right you know you might temper have temporary alliances with them you might be trading lux trades or

the rest of it but the end of it only one of you can win this game and the technologies then become the military attacks have always been important right you get to artillery first you're in a big advantage you get to infantry first you're in a really big advantage you get to bombers first a really big advantage this is just true again but starting all the way back to crossbows right so it's it's like you know can you find the hammers to get the technology going to get the culture going while simultaneously defending yourself and potentially you know being big enough that you're not going to be taken out or being big enough to take someone else out and I think it makes a makes a very dynamic game that's really really fun to be a part of it's a

balancing act yes absolutely it's it's a balancing act and it's really easy to go things will look at advantageous and you'll get greedy like oh I could build this building it's five turns I really should get those two units out, but I want the building. The building. And then the game's over just because of that tiny mistake. Or you could just work the wrong tile or something. There's so many macro and micro mistakes

to be made in the first 50, 75 turns. Filthy's fun to watch, though. He's smart and he's ruthless. And those two things are interesting to watch. He's just out there like screwing your mom every freaking stream. He has no patience for idiots. He doesn't go easy on anyone.

He is just ruthless in the game. To be fair, I think some of that got trained out of me, right? Initially you kind of go into it. I feel bad for this guy. He's not that great of a game i don't really want to kill him right now or you know man this guy was nice to me earlier it'd be really bad to just crossbow push him you do a couple games of that where it bites you in the ass and you're like well fuck now i'm screwed because i didn't take that guy's lands 50 turns ago when i needed that now my science can't compete with this other guy and you get to the point where you're like yeah

okay it's a game and i want to win the game and that requires that you know i treat it like these are my opponents and not my buddies you know even when i'm playing with my buddies there was a a game i was watching i think you might have been playing denmark or someone but but anyway someone asked you which um religion you wanted like which symbol and uh you're like go ahead and take it i'll come get it later and it seems like that happens. I find that if someone makes war on me at the wrong time, I really feel like I've been caught with my pants down. Not necessarily

because I don't have the units built, but because I'm just not heavy on that military tech. And they have, and that's where they've went. And I feel like if I'm attacked then, then I'm just so vulnerable that I can't turn everything around and right the ship and win. But when that guy started pushing you today the what was the Mongolia or something Huns yeah the Huns when he started pushing you it

seemed like he had like what he like three battering rams and like four of those horse archers he almost took woody craft I'm like this city's been donated for I really ought to fucking put up a fight here. Did that actually cross your mind? Yeah, sure did. It would be betraying my... Because at the same level, you don't ever want to lose cities, period. So of course I'm not going to give it up if I can avoid it. But at the same time, it's not like I'm going to throw the game to take that.

But at the same level, it would be kind of amusing if I just give him nothing. I get a sneak attack, terracotta army. He's the Huns. He comes in with his batting rants, let's just give him absolutely nothing. Let's give him one pillage on his sheep tile, not lose a single unit, and then take his capitals. For people to understand, in the stream today, I donated

and in exchange for the donation, I asked him to name one of his cities Woodycraft. And then it went under attack. I'm in the stream chatting about DDoS protection and how they can't hurt us. And it looked for a second i i i wasn't watching the stream the whole time but i looked up and i was like oh he's got like a mini little army over here on on these borders he's got like one spearman there like oh this could be trouble and then within maybe three

turns the army's like scattered and running across the desert so i think that's my favorite part of watching you play is is uh little uh when you when you're uh when you fight war the units skating around on your road system and uh uh that's that's the most i i see you like move your units in a in a way to to maximize their potential and save units and stuff like that and i feel like that's where this is how i watch him stream it's like this right I'm just all right all right all right and then he takes the wrist brace off whoa now what yeah I'm currently currently wearing a wrist brace this you think you know you're a streamer right you're stream you're playing video games you need the auto blow yes right clearly he wore it out yeah I've had that suggested I actually heard it on stream so repetitive stress injury he says the camera but you know had that suggested. I actually heard it on stream.

Repetitive stress injury, he says. Yeah, I guess that's what it is. As someone who never has played this game, you guys might as well be speaking fucking Mandarin. I have no idea what any of this means. But is it ever so lopsided? Is the game pretty fairly well balanced, or is it ever so lopsided that you'll storm into someone's area with marines, and they'll still be sharpening bronze spe spears and then you just bowl over them or is it kind of more

even so we're playing in a community that has a number of rules that are designed to make the multiplayer experience better and one of those rules is what's called an irrelevancy vote which you can you can ask to be voted irrelevant if the other players will pass that you can leave the game and what that tends to happen is when someone's so bad at science that they have you – they're sharpening their spears or you're rolling in with the nukes. So people tend not to be in that situation because they get voted out for that. But yes, it's possible. I mean you can be so bad at science that you're not doing anything and I'm teching. All the situations – so I've watched a whole video series of yours and then today's stream.

And whenever someone wanted to be declared irrelevant, like, you know, you know guys just grant me mercy you're kicking my ass so bad i want the pain to stop but i don't want to be known as a quitter they hold a vote and the answer is no the answer is stay around and absorb your ass kicking we that's totally what cheers was doing today cheers was like nah fuck those guys. Let Filthy destroy their fucking cities. They don't even let you surrender. They don't. They make you declare I am irrelevant. I'm not even worthy of surrendering. I need

all of you to validate my feelings of irrelevancy. Tell me how not matterful I am. I don't mean anything. But that's the thing. The guy says, I quit. I surrender. Please just stop beating me. Losing in Civ is slow. Like you've spent three hours building up your civilization, crafting it, whatever. And then you realize that you are inadequate.

So inadequate that you can't play with these people anymore. And you say, guys, please just stop the pain. And they say, no, the pain's still coming. Here's what happened today. Quickly, they were playing a six-person free-for-all all on the same map, you know, on a Pangea map where they're touching. And Filthy's neighbor attacks him early, and so Filthy builds an army and kills his neighbor.

And at that point, he'd already built the army, and he had a lot of the military culture tree. So he just kind of kept on going. And all of the remaining civs sort of formed an alliance against filthy it was chis and egypt and uh two other civs uh ethiopia and one more germany and uh they they had his four-way alliance against him and and and he's like ah well i can beat any two of them at hammers at any time but all four of them together and it's looking bad and then chiz is like you know what fuck this and he backstabs ethiopia takes their capital like when they had

peace declared between them and uh it it was just a shit fest and then germany is so like disgusted by this that after one round of attack of like trading blows with filthy he goes can we vote me irrelevant he's just like can i fucking go all right in today's game you know we're playing i'm playing with um most of the players that i don't know and what it turns out was most of the players i played with today were fairly newer players right you know they're probably looking at somewhere around like 500 hours of sith i don't really know what the hell they're doing filthy casuals right exactly filthy casuals and and the thing about that is that the games tend to be a little bit prescriptive when that happens. Not entirely, you know, you're still always going to have different circumstances and different civs and different starting locations and different problems. relevant they you know that that difference in relative skill level it's gonna you're gonna be you know the better players are gonna be a little bit ahead but they're not gonna be ahead in the

terms of like an era ahead they're gonna be ahead in like four or five techs or you know 20 hammers or something like that so what you tend to find in the lower level games the games with players who aren't quite as good is that a lot of the action happens very early before those players leave the game and what they tends to happen is if the demographics tend to be really like showing they're like okay this player is really far ahead and the rest of the guys in the game and what they tends to happen is if the demographics tend to be really like showing they're like okay this player is really far ahead and the rest of the guys in the game going we don't know what to do with this the only thing we can do is you know hold hands and use the buddy system here so it's like I mean that's exactly what happened today right it's like you know I got a

little bit ahead and then everyone in the game a map is like all right we need to put aside our differences and just go kill filthy today it wasn't enough but you know that's I mean you can sort of plan for that as a streamer right as the person who has the experience with this. I'm planning on the fact that in a game once I see that the demos are showing that the players aren't that great, I'm planning to be teamed in that era because it's going to happen.

It seems like it happens a lot. I feel like it's not just because you're a streamer, it's because you're oftentimes right there at the top. You're in the lead and you're the one that needs to be chased down. When they start seeing two or three or four hundred points difference in the lead, and you're the one that needs to be chased down. And when they start seeing two or three or four hundred points difference in the overall score, and they see you've got ten cities connected with roads, and they've got three or four, it's just like, why even continue?

Because I think anyone who knows you and has watched your videos knows that you're not going to make some weird macro mistake that makes your cities go unhappy or stop growing or some bullshit like that. It's quite the opposite. So it's hard to make that ground up, I guess. Hopefully at 4,000 hours of playing a video game, you start to be reasonably okay at it. Hopefully. Yeah.

Wouldn't you feel terrible if you were bad? How would you feel? Clearly you have a love and passion for the game, but what if you put this 4,000 hours in and you just got your ass kicked every time you played? You were just pulling your hair out, like, what the fuck? Yeah, you know, it wouldn't make any sense to me. Like, you know, you'd just be like, and there's players like that. There's players out there, players who love the game and play the game for the fun of it, and they don't actually care. There was a, so the No Quitters mod, there's a forum for that on Reddit where people talk about the balances that there's a player arguing that he's like you know he's like this is not a

competitive game most of the guys i play with just play with us to build sit build sit build uh civilizations and build cities and i'm like i'm not playing the same game you are am i you know because like i understand the sentiment the idea being that yeah this is fun and we don't need to get good at it but at the same time you know for me at least part of the fun if you're gonna spend four thousand hours why not get good you know yeah right like what's the maddest you've ever gotten like have you ever broken anything or like any good stories of you being enraged that some douche in transylvania beat your civilization i don't know the countries so you know his vampire i get called that quite a lot by fans and not so much fans because I tend to emotionally engage with the games

I'm playing with and especially in the moment So I absolutely can get fucking irate at people when this is happening. So the maddest I've ever been it's not actually I didn't actually upload this game. I ended up banning three players from the no-quitters group Sometimes there's a you wonder about that, you know the power differential there in some degree Is it really fair that I banned those players? Well, they did violate the rules and but I was really fucking pissed at them too. And this was when they were still the rank system in play. Just because it feels good doesn't mean it's abuse of power.

That's a good way of looking at it. It's true. Taylor said that. So this was back with the rank system. And basically what it boiled down to is I was actually Russia again. That's who I played today. And Russia has a really nice hammer bonus, a production bonus, right? And it makes a very clear target on the demographics, people go, shit, he has a lot of hammers, he's really dangerous. And I was getting teamed by like three or four players again, right?

And it went like this, they're attacking me three or four of them, two of whom in all likelihood had no real reason for doing this they wouldn't ever improve their position i would only improve one other guy's position which is in of itself sketchy in the rank system because the goal is eliminating the main player should be you improve your position and you have a better chance of winning the game it's really what should happen on this this is why you team a player otherwise you don't bother right and then what happened is they were killing me and i'm basically down to one or two cities i'm just refusing to lose i'm just making them choke on everything they take from me the longer i can stop them from converting anything they've taken from me into something useful the more enjoyment and like satisfaction i get out of this right you know and what happens is at the end of this there's three of them playing playing this game it's a rank game the goal is to win um two of them as soon as my capital is gone and i

have like one or two little cities left and i'm basically done the other two guys remaining in the game concede to the last guy in other words their whole point for that entire game was not to win. It was literally just to knock me out of the game. And that pissed me off. I mean, that's against all the colluding rules. It's against the teaming rules. It was just like, it's against any sort of like good sportsmanship. It's against any sort of like self-respect or dignity too, right?

You play the game to fucking win. You don't play the game because I'm so bad. I need like five of us to bring that one guy down. And that's mission accomplished. That's we're done. It seems like this game is just as much about having fun as it is making sure other people don't have any fun. Yes.

A lot of fun. You know what the most fun I've had in a long time was? I put a diplomat in. We played a 1v1 last night with the NQ mod because I wanted to finally get to use piety and enjoy it and I put a I put a diplomat in Chiz's City they didn't know about and I could see what he's building and how long it's gonna take him to build it so I know he's six turns away from getting Notre Dame and he needs the happiness badly and I I start reworking my hexes until I

can build it in five turns, and then I wait. And one turn before I'm done with it, I kill his whole army, and he says, GG, and I was like, let's go one more turn. We go one more turn, and he gets the notification that I have Notre Dame. My happiness is 32 now, and he's just like, fuck you, that's it. Game over. And that's how our game ended. If you'd like to even maximize that particular strategy, you can use a great engineer,

and you can let them spend 10 turns or 8 turns building a wonder, and on the very last turn, you can engineer the wonder at the same time and then same turn them on that. That's a really beautiful thing to do. I love doing that as well. I just didn't have one. I'm not an experienced Civ guy, but when two people finish a great wonder that only one person can have in the same turn,

how does the game pick who gets it? Order that they join the lobby. So the host gets first shot at it, the second person to join the lobby gets the next shot at it, and so on down. That's a lousy system. There should be something more merit-based. It's so frustrating.

I just learned that today watching your game. That's what I always say. Someone will ask me, because I just looked, I have 1,356 hours. And somebody will be like, wow, that's what I always say like like someone will ask me like they're like because I've got I just looked I have 1356 hours and somebody like wow that's a lot of time. I guess you got it figured out now and I'm like Every day I learn a new thing Absolutely every single day and if I watch a couple videos, I'll learn five or six things I'm so disappointed with that answer order that they join the lobby. Yeah, that's crazy. No it should be like answer order that they join the lobby yeah that's crazy no it should be like you know he had excess hammers better get in there fast i know there's so many better options out there but that is the

the current system i mean this is a great part about the modding community honestly and like these are the super fans basically these are these are players who have watched the streams watched us play i've watched the the quote-unquote pros playing this and been like and here it hurt us bitching about various mechanics and gone hey we, we can fix that. And I started to do that. I mean, the No Quitters mod is so good for the game. It's doing so much to redress some of the imbalances that are in there and make it so much more fun. It's really cool.

I'm not that good at Civ, but get this. So I donated to your stream and I had your name as City after WoodyCraft, right? And then I think I had another one named PKA and another one named something else. Factions Fire. Factions Fire.

Yeah, thank you. And then I donated again and I asked him to join PKA. So what I feel like is, well, I can't hang with you in Civ. I kind of purchased a City-State's Allegiance. You did. You literally purchased him for a while. I had the thought today that I think, you know, I do sub goals pretty regularly. And sometimes I do like, you know, I play sub goals pretty regularly, and sometimes I do, like,

you know, I play with my subscribers, like, we do some games like that, those have been pretty fun. Sometimes we do, like, me and another quote-unquote pro versus a number of, you know, the subs or that kind of thing. I had the thought that it might be fun to do, like, a donation game, where I let the chat actually choose my kind of, like, you know, go cross the continent to attack Germany on the other side of that mountain range, because the

chat's donated for this. I think it might be kind of fun to just have a totally anarchist, you know, a total anarchy in terms of what I get to do. No choices on my part, just do like that. I like that. That's really fun. You can literally purchase how the course of the game goes. Filthy is going to take

up tourism this game. So are there really shitty civilizations that you would never like when someone joins and they're like romania are you like look at this idiot or like are they all pretty okay because i'll try it out with kyle he's kind of convincing me to try i have funny don't do it the best thing i think this much I need to play it. No. I have no fucking idea what you're talking about. No. So Filthy has an amazing video where he goes through every Civ and ranks them on his own tier scale. And he gives very good arguments for all of his ideas for their ranking. But I thought the funniest thing that came along with the NQ mod is they completely just removed Venice from the fucking game.

They're so irrelevant in multiplayer. And that was my favorite part so yeah in a in a multiplayer aspect i would have to assume that venice is the absolute worst with their inability to build i don't see how japan would thrive in pangea oh it's pretty shit uh japan's a pretty bad one too i mean i mean the tier list was specifically designed for multiplayer games and what i found is i really wanted to do five tiers of civs. That was a pretty reasonable rating system. For me, I could reasonably place pretty much all the civs in that. But there were two outliers that I couldn't place on a five-tier system, and they were Iroquois and Venice,

because they're the only civs whose bonuses actually made them worse than if they didn't have bonuses at all. So those would be the two that I would recommend strongly to stay away from. What are the bonuses? Like Venice can paddle very quickly. Iroquois, very good at lacrosse. So,

Venice's bonus is that it gets double trade routes, but you can't found new cities. You can only settle your one city. And in multiplayer, the game is about production and science, and you have to have more cities to get production and science. So, if you go Venice in multiplayer, what happens is either everyone just expands around you and lasts as you're still sharpening your spears

and they're launching nukes, or they just look at your one city and they go, oh, we'll just kill that and take that. So it's like either way, you're kind of boned with Venice. So that's their problem. And then the Iroquois, I've always been saying, I say that wrong in all my videos. I call it Iroquois, but it's actually Iroquois,

and I figured out that recently. But anyways, the Iroquois, their big deal was that they had buildings that were worse than the base buildings. Their modifiers, it was supposed to be a benefit. They give you production from forests, but the downside was they didn't have a properly functioning workshop, so you lost a percent modifier and gained an absolute value that wasn't equal to the percent lost. And that is what I find most impressive about your videos and your gameplay. Over there, you have like a bulletin board sort of set up with all kinds of charts and graphs, like information like how much is it to buy a Spearman, like 170 gold?

I guarantee it's written right there. Jesus Christ. Is your shit list on there? Please tell me it is. No, I did keep one by hand for a while and then basically what I found is that people get better at the game right so like

putting someone permanently on a shit list with no way to get off of it is pretty much not not a good thing he did he'd be like that bullshit that's bullshit this is my shit list good a chat for a while but it's like what guy message me he like messy like posted it in like the no quitters like good steam chat. He was like can someone please ask filthy to remove me from the shit list

I really don't deserve to be on this shit list. I'm not that bad a player Maybe this isn't a good idea. Oh just internally got a shit list isn't even people that were mean to you. They're just bad players players this guy all right so what he's doing he's building boats when he should be both can I have permission poker to I would really like to maintain a shit list on my stream get is it okay if I copy this concept from you yes the problem is this right so okay you're in a game where you're balancing five other players and the goal is to win this game and the win this game you know it's gonna be a long long long eight-hour game probably drawn out there's gonna be a hell of a lot of stuff going on in this and the thing is you need

to be able to predict what your opponents are going to be doing to some degree and this to do that you have to have some sense of how they're thinking about the game and there's some people who just are not sane they either they do not think like i do you know they are building fucking boats you're looking at them you're going why are you building boats right now you're being attacked by a land army there's absolutely zero reason to be building 45 boats right now, but you have 45 boats floating around outside your harbor. And at that point, they go on the shit list because it's not possible to predict them. They're doing things

that are so indifferent than the actual winning strategies in Civ that they might as well not be there. What you're talking about is why oftentimes, a question that they'll ask professional poker players is would you rather play against an absolute novice player

or a professional player? And a lot of them will say a professional because you can actually... You can guess what a pro's going to do. You can get inside that guy's mind because you're thinking on the same level, and you both understand the game thoroughly. But with someone who doesn't know what the fuck they're doing,

they could, like you said, they could build a bunch of frigates out of nowhere, come bombard your coastal city, and there was no real reason for you to build any defense there. I know exactly what you're saying. That's also a very easy cop-out for professionals of anything to say. Like if you asked me, like, would you rather have Sidney Crosby shoot on me in goal,

hockey player, for those of you out there, would you rather have him shoot on me when I was playing goalie, or, you know, a nine-year-old who's really gifted i'm gonna pick sydney crosby every time because if that nine-year-old is just fucking schooling me i'm gonna look like a jackass if sydney crosby is scoring it's like i don't give a shit he's the best player in the league of course he's gonna score like so of course poker players would rather lose to professional than somebody like me who's like, are these colors good? Well, that's the problem.

I mean, part of the game is responding to your opponents, right? And the same with poker, right? You're trying to get reads on them. You're watching how they play. You're watching what their bets represent and what they actually have for hands and that type of thing. And, like, the same with Civ, right? As you play with these players, you see how they approach the game, how they think about things, how they hide their militaries, how they react to threats, how they react to aggressive expands and this type of thing.

And you have some sort of read and ability to respond to that. And what is a civ is it's a series of incremental victories that win you the long-term stuff. It's five hammers here. It's getting a wonder here that you might not have got. It's being able to say, I don't need military in this situation. I can invest in infrastructure instead that allow you to pull off these wins. And when you have players who have no

Idea what they're doing and play totally insane also to be fair like that hunt player today, right? You know he just randomly decided we don't have particularly conflicted borders. There's not a lot of reason to attack me I have triple his production so any war that isn't immediately won in the first about ten turns I'm gonna crush him in you know in other words. I don't even identify him a threat at one point that game I looked at Michael. He has ten hammers. i don't care what he does it doesn't matter what he does he's totally irrelevant to the course of my game in this but because i have no because he's so new at this game i have no way of predicting his thought process he looked at this and goes i guess i should attack filthy here no one knows why he came to this conclusion we don't know the

thought process i went to that but it makes it very very difficult to play with and also and often kind of frustrating to play with when you're playing with four good players and one player who's like that he acts as a wild card that tends to just like sabotage games from where you're planning around a kind of logical or reasonable set of opponents and then this one player just does something so fucking off the wall that you're like okay well i can deal with that but the game is probably over for me while dealing with that i got a question for filthy so you're taking a gap year, right? So you're pursuing a PhD. Am I right on that? So what I actually just told my department about this a couple of weeks ago, actually a mildly amusing story. So I took a year leave. I finished my master's. I was in a

PhD program. So I was in a psychology PhD program. And the master's is along the way I get my master's and go for my PhD. And I chose to take a year off and do streaming full-time. And that's what I've done. I'm actually about 11 months, 10 months into that, something like that right now. And I just recently had to go back to my department and tell them, you know, it's been that academic year. Do I want to come back or do I want to, you know, basically terminate my stay with the program?

I've actually just chosen to terminate my stay with that program. So you're not going to pursue the PhD anymore? So it's not a door closed. So I have the option at some point of, they've said, you know, you did very good work here. We'd be happy to have you back. But I'd have to reapply for that or go to apply to a different program for a PhD program. So I have a master's. So I'm just trying to think.

I guess the streamer thing is working out for you? You're happy with your income and lifestyle? Are you going nocturnal and unhealthy on us? Have you gained 20 pounds like so many YouTubers do when they first go pro? Yes and yes. So am I happy with it? I'm fairly happy with it. I mean this is one of the big decisions for me to actually try this route is that, you know, I – of course probably like pretty pretty much everyone out there i enjoy gaming and i've enjoyed gaming for a large portion of my life

it's a huge hobby of mine it's something that uh i really identify with and pay a lot of attention to it's one of my hobbies and you know free time pursuits etc etc um and uh you know i was kind of at this point in graduate school where you know i was working i was pretty much i would be proposing my dissertation is what i'd be doing the next step in that i'm kind of dealing with the publication process the peer review and publication process which is a huge fucking pain in the ass by the way uh you guys have never done that it's a a lot of you know sending it out you know you get random get random people reviewing it who are like you need to change this and then you change that you send to the next people and they want you to undo the changes that the first people have done it's just

it's a huge pain in the ass it's a it's a really long process you're seeing often easily a year year and a half before when you send out a paper to when you're actually getting it published and it's just i was at a point in graduate school where i needed to decide was this really what i wanted to do or not and the total answer is there's lots of things i really liked about graduate school and academia and lots of things i would enjoy and could see making a life out of but i wasn't entirely sure about the gaming side of things too. It's like, can I potentially make a living doing this? Can I potentially find some niche that I can fit into that will allow me to both make the

hobby and make it a living? And kind of what actually pushed me over the edge, which is, you know, my stream last set, you know, is that I wouldn't have done this. I would have stayed in graduate school. But what the kind of culminating factor for me was the girlfriend. The girlfriend said, I really think you should go try this. This is something you're really good at. This is something you really enjoy. I see the change in your personality and enjoyment when you're doing this versus when you're not doing this. I really think you should go for it. So I got kind of pushed

into it from the girlfriend to actually try this as an actual thing. To the income, it's been a year. I don't seem to make all that much money on it, honestly. We'll have to see how long. There's not a lot of money in being a student either. No, no. No, it's not anything student. But, you know, a student is working on an education that results in an end goal that is not being a student.

Yeah. Well, this is it. This is your launching pad. You're watching it right now you and autoblow 2 are about to blow up you definitely have your own little niche though because like there's tons of tutorial videos on youtube if you search civ 5 tutorial you'll you'll get with a menagerie of videos that are worthless so many of our just bullshit and worthless and like i've watched all the top five tips videos and I'm just like this is juvenile stuff this is first day

like tutorial shit that the game like the game's in game tutorial stuff would tell you like yeah I know where to plant my city like I'm not getting anything out of this but then you go to your videos and they're exactly what I was looking for it's I see you know how you're working your hexes I see how

you fight a real war you know things like bringing the road system with you and making huge swaths of road covered tiles to to be able to bring units in and out like like we just never i'd never seen that before until we started watching your videos so you've definitely got your own little niche and you're you seem to be the best at making videos of it not just the best at doing it i appreciate that you know it's it's the part of the part of graduate school that I really liked was pursuing my research topics of my own interest. So, finding and answering questions that I had that were interesting questions to me

and the teaching people who gave a shit, right? That was the other part of graduate school that I really liked. And you know, this is kind of a continuation of that to some degree. It's like, you know, the first couple of guide videos I put out there, this is before I'd chosen to go try streaming as a profession. And it was basically about like, all right, well, I know know about this i get a lot of questions from people about this i get a lot of people on my stream asking me about this why don't i talk about this for a little bit and you'll see some of them you know i get i get accused of making guide videos that are too long

you know like the guide like the for example the we're talking about the civ tier list the civ tier list is a four hour video four fucking hours of me talking about civ right and i mean the whole point i made it this way it was it's a reference guide you know it has it has time like stamps to every single Civ if you want to spend five minutes and hear about your said you can go do that but the complaint I get people and I don't understand this complaint which is you know filthy if this was shorter I'd watch it what you want me to like give you nothing like you mean it takes time to talk about a topic it takes time to tell you you know to do anything that is

more than just like the surface level. Yeah, this is a good tip. They have science. You should pick that. That doesn't tell you anything. I don't know. Four hours is pretty long. Four hours is pretty long, but filthy. I don't mean to pull the old man YouTube. If you don't know, I've been on YouTube since 2009. I have 1.2 million subs.

I used to go at YouTube really hard. I had the most success with making the kind of videos that I like to watch. I've made videos here and there where I maybe copy somebody else's style. I've made videos that maybe I thought the subscribers would want. And they never went quite as well as when I made the kind of videos that I enjoy. What I made is much different than yours. It was usually like five to 12 minutes of how I feel about a topic. And this is what I see going on. This is what I think we should do about this or that. And sometimes it was game related, like a Call of Duty mechanic.

Sometimes it was not. It was like why Google is getting into the ISP business and I would analyze that. And those are the kind of videos that I like watching and they were always my most successful style. Yeah, it's such a weird business. It's so different. It's so different than anything I've ever done before. There's so much self-promotion in it that I don't like.

I don't like that. No, I was gonna say that earlier. So your stream, I was watching, I've only watched one of your streams, but I've also watched one of your prerecorded streams, so I kind of feel like that's two, which is long because they take hours and hours to go. And you have a nice balance of playing the game and fan interaction. You thank people for donations, but you don't make it like, I've seen other streams where they do donation wars, where they really go overboard with the graphics and thank you and play a movie and kick into a dance and and uh and um i was like aha i feel like this guy in watching it hits the mark that i aspire to hit and uh thanks for that i mean i

don't want i don't want to be a monkey right i don't want to be like you know like they donate like that's the term i've used dance for me you know and i'm like i don't really want to dance a dancing monkey is the thing i've said yeah yeah right like yeah yeah i don't want i don't want that it's not at all interesting to me it doesn't fit at all how i want to interact with that i appreciate my fans supporting me and it's absolutely crucial if i'm going to do this as any sort of like actual financial like financially viable thing but the the goal is actually to move away from being forced to do things i don't want to do is to be doing things that i want to be doing and hopefully what i find is the market of, you know, the people who want to

be watching what I'm providing and hopefully I can adapt to what that is. But, you know, if it doesn't work out that way, the last thing I want to end up doing is, you know, sitting there fucking, you know, doing pushups for fucking subs or something, you know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. I, um, my most recent stream, I left T notifier off and I thought it was weird that nobody donated at all but whatever you know I'm not I'm fine with that too and uh later it turned out that people had donated and they didn't get the proper thank yous and there was a whole uh it wasn't a hate thread it was really constructive criticism but a lot of constructive criticism is sometimes hard to

swallow a lot of very constructive did you see the thread by chance specific constructive yeah it was like woody you're not doing this right you're not doing that right and a lot of it was revolving around the subs and the um the donations and i just left t notifier off because i'd recorded a private video and i didn't want i don't know if people don't know this but there's like a 20 second countdown when you first turn it on and you don't want that in a video so anyway uh yeah it's they only had my best interest in mind but it was awful to read is sib growing that's an interesting question i guess we could look up like steam demographics to have a look at that i don't know this top 10 game is it yeah okay cool that's really good i mean we don't get shit for numbers on streaming it i mean it's a very small game if you look at it for twitch in terms of actual viewer count you know it's oh it's basically me and two other two to three other streamers who actually pull

any numbers on that and even i don't pull numbers i mean i say that i mean i've seen somewhere between three and five hundred viewers probably on average so i mean that's that's pretty small fish as to as streams go do you not care for beyond earth no beyond earth No, Beyond Earth, I mean, I don't want to knock the company. The company produces a lot of really good stuff, but Beyond Earth was a pile of shit, and it was a total disaster for multiplayer. So we tried it as a group. We were actually quite excited for that.

A lot of the Civ guys, when it came out, did a 24-hour stream of it, played a shit ton of multiplayer of it. It's not viable for multiplayer at all. I didn't play enough of it to know the of it it's not viable for multiplayer at all so i i didn't play enough of it to know uh the reasons why it's not viable for multiplayer but i played enough of it to know that i didn't enjoy it as much as i did uh civ 5 for a number of reasons and we went back probably within a month i would say now how is civ 5 upon its release though because it's had dlc that civ 5 without the dlc in in my amateur opinion isn't half the game that it is with all the DLC what do you think about Beyond Earth can can it be saved with DLC I mean anything can be

saved with DLC it depends how much effort and time they put into it and how much how much they care about balancing the game right and I mean it's it's it's scary to see some of the things that companies are doing out there versus what some other companies doing I mean look at Blizzard right look at Blizzard's repeated patches. I mean, regardless of how much you like the content they're putting out, you look at WoW, you look at Hearthstone or something, regardless of how much that type of game appeals to you, the support they put into it

and making sure that when imbalances crop up, they get addressed and making sure that no one class is overly dominant for any length of time, that type of stuff is so, so good for the game as both a competitive game, but also just like replayability and actually enjoyment right and i think the problem with you know the civ civ and to you know some extent to beyond earth is that there just isn't that kind of that kind of input into it like that repeated you know it's not it's not ever going to be a one passing you know it's going to take it's going to take evaluations and coming

back to it and having to look at this oh How does it play for newbies versus pros? How does it pan out? I don't think you can do that. This is one of the great things with the modding stuff. I'm an XCOM streamer as well, and XCOM 2 is coming out. One of the things they've announced with XCOM 2 is that it's going to be totally open for modders to do whatever the hell they want with it from the get-go. That's not a multiplayer game, so it's not quite the same. But at the same time, that kind of mentality is so good for games you can go okay well if we have a dedicated community we have a dedicated group we can go all right the

gaming company doesn't want to put the time into balancing this well we can so that's pretty cool hey back to the gap year thing so you you've been streaming for an entire year and when did your girlfriend say you should do it was it the start of that year or is it current? Are you asking if you're still advocating it? I guess I am. Yeah, yeah. Okay. So initially, I was thinking about it. Basically, we were coming up to comprehensive exams which are the portion. So after you finish your master's and the PhD program, you take comps and comps are like a big, huge, like two days of testing basically everything you know about everything, what you're supposed to know. And then you go and you write your

dissertation. And I was coming up basically studying for comprehensive exams and I'm like you know do I want to do this I basically have to put two or three months into just studying and you know I'm kind of at a point where I'm not entirely sure I want to continue with this program or not and you know she basically said you know give this a chance you know give it a give it a try see how it goes take a year take a little bit longer in a year take whatever you want to see if this is something viable so how how is she now? She's equally supportive as she was then. It's tough to say, you know, your income sources are so diverse when you're streaming, right?

You have things like donations, you have things like YouTube, you have things like Twitch advertisements, you have things like Patreon, that type of stuff, right? It's all over the place where you get it from. And then Civ died for two months or three months while I was doing this, you know? So I'm taking a year to play Civ and see how it goes as a streaming thing and for three months civ was not playable in multiplayer they patched it and they broke it they didn't unbreak it for three months so i'm like oh wow that's that kind of put it you know bit of a bit of a downturn on the finances for that period of time so it's scary so i'm married uh like you i so i had a regular job

you don't know me but um I was a senior software architect working at Cisco I've been a programmer for like 20 years something like that 13 of them at Cisco um and then I was doing the YouTube thing and my wife is like yeah go ahead you could switch you just drop your whole career like you do what you want to do and um one of the challenges with Jackie is that she's like ridiculously supportive. And that's a challenge. That's one of the challenges. It is.

Filthy might line up with this. Wait till you hear this. I wanted an overcome adversity story and she ruined it. Here's the thing. If I told her, honey, I want to be a juggling clown. Like this is my new passion. It's what I'm all about. My essence is in juggling. And I want to be a juggling clown, like this is my new passion, it's what I'm all about, my essence is in juggling, and I want to be a juggling clown, she'd be like, you get them, Woody.

You'll be the best juggling clown they've ever seen. And I can't fucking juggle at all. I'm awful. Not with that attitude. But she would support me anyway. So on one hand, it's great to be supported, and that's wonderful. On the other hand, it means that it's really your responsibility to make responsible decisions.

I have a wife and two kids. And this is not a game here. Well, it's kind of a game, but yeah. If she's gonna support me. Wait a minute, what do you do for a living? It's not a game. I love it. like, okay, this is serious, right? Even though I work with games, this is serious. This is, you know, we're,

we're buying the house, we're taking the kids, we'll put them in college. Like these are real life things. They're huge repercussions. And, you know, she's so supportive and it's great. But on the other hand, it puts all the burden on me to make sure that I don't screw this up because she would support me, you know, like, you know, to the top and to the bottom. So make sure you're headed in the right direction. Yeah. Thanks. Yeah. I mean, you can't tell for sure, you know, like time, time will, time will give me the information to make the decisions. Right. Well, I'm sorry. Go ahead. Go ahead. go ahead i was gonna say i hope that your time on here i

hope a lot of our listeners go and check out your uh your streams because i really enjoy them i definitely enjoyed today's because i was i was watching chis play uh he he messaged me to try to join in but i didn't get the message until it was too late but uh hopefully next time i'd like to play with you guys and uh and uh see what I've got at the highest level I'm gonna be pretty honest here this wasn't totally selfless that I'm here I didn't just do this because you know yeah wait a minute oh my god promotion shit a little bit and it turns out that when someone with a lot of you count goes hey you should come talk to us like yeah that seems like a really good idea.

That's the whole point. Yeah, there's a give and take there. That's what makes this whole business work. That's what gets people together and lets people meet and exchange ideas. That's the thing, right? And there's a win-win here, right? I think you're interesting because you're smart and you're ruthless. And you think I'm interesting because I can promote your stream.

Well, let's do this you know and honestly you know like a lot of it is going to be it's like every other profession the entire rest of your life is a lot of it is knowing people right and this is you know this is going out and meeting the people who are doing what i'm interested in doing professionally and they're doing it already so i think that's a pretty good thing as it is so as to yes would you like to get some other games again right i'd like to get some other games if nothing else i think it'd be really really fun to uh to play i mean i like playing groups of games anyways with people i know you know the better i know them and the more interaction we can have in the game if we're on voice comms like that makes the game better

when i play with my regulars the game is more fun because we have personalities that i know and understand interacting with each other right so like bringing in a group of friends to play i think is a really really good idea anyways so i agree completely i uh i'll often tweet and uh just and the lobby will fill up pretty fast and then we'll delete you know we'll get rid of anybody who doesn't have the correct dlc and who can't communicate or whatever and we're usually left with there's a group of players that we have and some of them have been put on the shit list and others have been put on yeah let's go after that guy he'll stay in there for nine and a half hours if we need him to and uh and we've kind of lord peter bailish lord peter bailish let me just say this when i tweet playing civ 5 open lobby let's go free for all all the dlc

peter i i look at all my steam notifications and peter bailish is online within 45 fucking seconds that means that he's getting a text notification. Kyle's playing Civ. And he's like, Steam time! I imagine if like when you like remote, like you know VPNs in or whatever the fuck it is. It like logs in. He's like, I'm kicking the rest of the day off work. Get in the lobby

on the way home. He's fucking running. He's like a superhero who's got to change while he's running away to the scene of the crime. He's like a superhero who's got to change while he's running away to the scene of the crime. He's like getting logged into Steam and loading his PC up as he's running to his house or something. He's the new God of Death. When I played COD, I had a guy named GodofDeath89, and he was two things. He was really good at the game.

When I played with people that watched my videos, they were better than normal players. These are people who are very into the game. They're not just casuals. And God of Death would lead the lobby of good players all the time. And also, it was hard to join my stream. So when I streamed COD, I would pull between like four and 8,000 people.

So it's difficult to get in the game. And I'd play maybe three games, empty the whole lobby, and then bring in the next 11. He would get in that 11 like 75% of the time. Something about him was he had better equipment. Like he had a keyboard for his Xbox. And everyone else is like working the controller. Clickety-clap.

Clickety-clap. Yeah. And he also just knew what to do. He had a different technique of joining the games. And he was so good at it. After a while, I'd just invite him into my games for the start. Because he was so fucking good, you'd invite him on your team.

Yeah, because if he's random, he could end up on either team. But if I invite him in, he's always on my team. I was like, oh look, God night and death. And he was truly,

I watched a lot of your streams and I remember that guy and I think I've played with him a few times and he was one of those top tier COD players who if he's on the other team, you can't lead a group

of randoms to victory against real players but you can make you can ruin the other team's fun like you can make a group of guys who usually pub stomp and really have a great time every game and you can have them cursing because you're taking their kill you're ending the kill streaks yeah i remember playing with you kyle when my connection would be bad and it would be you, Socrates, and me in a party. And I would get booted or something and I would just rejoin your game and I would get on the other team of Socrates. I'd just leave. It was no fun playing against that guy. He would just eat the shit out of you relentlessly.

You always thought you had him and you never did. Filthy, you don't know Socrates, but this is interesting. So Socrates was an amazing Call of Duty player, right? Like just top notch. Because when you said you don't know Socrates, I'm like thinking back to my philosophy classes. Okay, different Socrates. He was a gamer buddy of ours, I met through Kyle.

And then he stopped playing COD, joined the Air Force, and started flying UAVs. Like so in real life. He applied his fucking skills. Some of them are like the next level, right? joined the Air Force and started flying UAVs. Like so in real life. He applied his fucking skills. Some of them are looking for the next level, right? He's like, you guys, you're fucking noobs actually sitting here playing this.

He's ruining a lot of people in the Middle East's day. And he was really good. My KDN COD was 4.2. In real life, 87,000. Yeah. He's rigged for audio. He's really looking for the cursing that's really what gets into the day but yeah he went and started like real life video games essentially in war and

and he had i find this in all players who are like a master of the game they play there's a kind of calm demeanor while they're like in in any any circumstance it might to a regular player you'd be like oh shit we're done but he's just like all right well i gotta fall back and use my m16 now and i feel i feel like it's the way you lamented today you're like all right i guess i'll build a few units all right then and in your head you're like you're like now i have to crush you and that's kind of how he was in almost any situation but with COD. And he was truly a step above where I was certainly. Maybe two steps above where I was. Just a really good player. And I don't know if it was hand-eye coordination or just the

thousands of hours we played, but I mean we'd play Black Ops and he would run like UAV, counter UAV and a Blackbird. And just run behind him and get and get chopper gunners over and over when you play with him you've got surveillance the whole game I still got him on Skype he needs to get some time off I'd love to play with him again yeah I like I I enjoyed his company so much he reached out to me when like a new Borderlands was dropping and was like hey we should play this together I really like playing it with you and I'm like me I mean I mean yes it sounds like you know you're doing this really you probably have the same experience right you meet people through the gaming that like become friends and become friends like way beyond the game

that you're playing with them you know I went out to visit route to my girlfriend and I took a actually sold it well I don't know if I should say that here i guess it's too late now i sold a game account one game i was interested and took a trip to hawaii with that right and uh i stayed in part of why i was out in hawaii part of where i stayed was with a friend from a game i've been playing with who i'd never met in real life before i stayed out there for like you know three or four days at his place in between that and like the hotel we ended up in and like it was great you know like we met him like i keep in touch with him it's like started in a game and it was you know we were together in that game because we're both good at the game and enjoyed each other's company and it turns out that that translates into real

life as well which is like it's a pretty cool part of the gaming experience again yeah we're very familiar with that oh yeah that's that's how we all met you know um i taylor and i used to how did we originally meet what's our earliest you You and I? I remember I messaged you during Modern Warfare 2. I feel like there's a joke to be made here with the product today. I feel like Kyle, you were saying you messaged me in Modern Warfare 2, but I think I first met you in Wings

and put me in the same call as you. Maybe so. I might have met Kyle through Wings 2 playing, but I can't recall when we first played together. It might have been a Zombies thing. Taylor paid to be my friend. Twice.

Twice? Is that true? No, that's true. No, I was doing a thing where it was for March of Dimes. I think it was called something. It was by March of Dimes, but it was like March for Babies or something like that. Buy March for Dimes, but it was like March for Babies or something like that. And I was doing a fundraiser, and anyone who donated $50 towards the charity, and it was all straight up.

It wasn't that they had their own website and you were able to donate it directly. It wasn't like, give the money to me, and I'll send it on. No, no, we're good. It was all legit. And he donated $50 to prevent birth defects in babies. And anyone who did that, I would do a dual-com with. And that's how I first met Taylor. See, and that worked out fine. Because at the same time, Wings was doing something where it was like,

yeah, send me $100 and I'll put you on. And everybody who got popular that way, they were like, you fucking sellout. You bastard. You nerdness. And I was like, well, if I donate it to charity, people can't be mad. No, they can. I was in the stage of the internet.

Yeah, that's what I thought. At the time, Woody had like 28,000 subs. So I was like, oh, this guy, this guy's going to the top. Yeah, but that's how all of us are. We all kind of, and I'd say, you know, it's just the three of us here, but there's a larger friend group that we're kind of part of

that we all kind of met online in one way or another where there was uh you know friends of friends playing call of duty a lot we used to all play call of duty heavily uh and uh till we had vitamin d deficiencies and um it's such an unhealthy profession streaming just in general it's so fucking bad for you sitting here i have an arm brace on today because I'm doing this too much. Are you kidding me? Doing what now? Hey, can I suggest the autoblow too? This was the perfect segue I've just given you. Yeah, so the online friendship thing,

and my regulars have heard me say this before, I think it's interesting because it doesn't matter if you're fat, it doesn't matter if you're old, it doesn't matter if you're black or white or whatever. The only thing that matters is the content of your heart and the tone of your voice. Everything else is just... Oh, right, so gay.

But everything else is... When you're online, that's it. Oh, and maybe how good you are at the game. That kind of matters. I was going to say, the last one kind of matters. Yeah, the last one matters. Most of the time, people have these horror stories of like, oh, yeah, I got along with Zebra Slayerayer 69 and then we met up online or in real life and he was

just a weirdo and a perv and i hated him like that does happen sometimes where you get to know somebody online then you meet them in real life like after playing a bunch of games and they're just a totally different person like they won't talk or look you in the eye but 95 of the time they're the same person so if you get along with them, you're gonna get along in person too. My experience was a little different. I was like, yeah, we were hanging online, and turns out he's like a weirdo and a perv,

and it was great. We were like two peas in a pod. It's weird when you meet someone that, you know, you used to be sort of a fan of online, like the earliest, like the first guy that got me interested in making YouTube videos or watching YouTube videos or even the first Call of Duty videos I watched were Zerg Riz.

And three or four years after seeing his first video, I'm at some machinima award show or something with Mike, who is Zerg Riz's real name, and having dinner with him and drinking beers and stuff. You know, it's just weird how like you end up meeting those people and moving around in the same circles. He got really drunk that night and lost. I was a bit like that in psychology, you know, like I'm reading, like when I'm reading these textbooks or like, you know, these articles that I'm reading these classes and, you know,

you see these names pop up again and again and again. These are like, you know, these are the celebrities of the psychology world. And then you go to the conferences and you know you see these names pop up again and again again these are like you know these are the celebrities of the psychology world and then you go to the conferences and you meet them and they're like regular guys and they're pretty cool and you know you get to chit chat with them about your research and shit like that yeah and it's like you know you have this weird like there's actually people who study this and look at the interaction between like fans and celebrities it's kind of it's kind of a weird thing the other interesting thing is this like sometimes you'll watch people who make videos or do live streams and you only see the best side of them. And you think like, ah, here's a guy who's really got things figured out. Here's a guy who's got things figured out. He's so awesome. And then I meet them in real life

and it's like, wow, this guy has like a drinking problem. This guy, you know, is completely unsuccessful in his personal relationships. Yeah. Yeah. And, and it's like, you know, he's able to hold it together for seven and a half minutes it's like you know he's able to hold it together for seven and a half minutes yeah right he's able to hold it together in seven and a half minutes and he seems like a superstar but when you really learn about this guy and who he is he's a wreck and you know that stuff happens too two seconds i'll be right back my this just started pouring rain and i want to go close the window before I... Okay, perfect.

I'd like to talk about my PO Box very quickly. Oh, okay. But I think we need to pimp Dollar Shave Club too because we kind of ran through that quickly at the start. We started at 8.20. So we're 30 minutes out. Okay, I just want to make sure we do it well for them. I'm on 100%.

We start in 17 minutes on that ad um so my PO box is 102 Carnesville PO box 102 Carnesville Georgia 30521 and I got some cool stuff recently you guys really seem to be like beating that whole me disliking that random photo of me online thing to death so I got this enormous i'm gonna have to zoom out my camera let me keep sending him these things this is hysterical i think it's really funny like you guys get creative with this shit this couldn't have been cheap yeah like look at the definition on that like this is a hd fucking print like i don't think it's canvas world or whatever um we're looking at them as a sponsor actually right

now but uh it's perfect and it's massive it covers my whole fridge i hope you can like get an an idea for just how big my whole fridge i left it i like showed it to my girlfriend and kitty and like when i came back they had magnetized it to the the fridge and that's what my fridge looked like and then like i had a bunch of stuff come on the same day. And the other thing is this. So I got a shirt with the same thing. You guys just are relentless with that. And then I guess this one is more for Kitty's office, but I got this.

You guys really spare no expense with your fucking gag gifts. I appreciate that. There's also a big shoebox full of candy that arrived. I will not be eating any of that. But thanks for sending it anyway. I'm going to get a P.O. box. I'm really excited about this. So people, I don't have a P.O. box.

But what they do is they dox me and get my address and send me stuff. And some of my most prized possessions are from subs. I've got quotes of me and stuff. Here, I'll take it off the wall. This thing is old. But at one point in a video, I think I was talking about some guy who was in the friend zone. I had recently gone on a trip to the Dominican Republic and we did this cliff diving thing. I jumped, but whatever. And I was like, hey, you only need to be brave for a second and the rest takes care of itself.

And something about cliff diving and talking to girls just seemed like, you know, once you kick off that first like thing, then the rest just rolls from there. You're in it. You're committed. And they loved it and built this. Dude, it's like 3D and stuff. Bost. Very high quality. And they loved it and built this. Dude, it's like 3D and stuff. Oh, embossed. Very high quality. On the back of it, it says,

Handcrafted in Torrington, Connecticut, Joe Coppler Art Gallery. Like someone. Fancy. See, that quote is risky business. Like it makes sense for cliff diving. But like when you said, oh, you know, cliff diving, talking to girls. Like you can walk up to a chick. Yeah, and be like, hey, what's up, baby?

She's like, no, not much, you can do oh oh goodbye that's all I had that's all I had I was looking for a second I'm gonna write some more lines haha no and it's not like that you need you figure out the regular people and it all goes smooth from there I see this thing called mail Monday and subscribers would ask me like questions. It was like gay porn recommendations.

It was not. Oh, Mail Monday, I get it. How did that work out for you, though, as a general advice? Gay porn? Yeah. No, the advice thing, it worked out super well. Like, even today, so it's been years, right?

At the time, it was all requests for help. Now, like every day, I get thank yous. Here, I got one today if I scroll up in these messages. You get these heavy messages. People who were like in really rough situations in their life, they had like – they're 16 and they got their girlfriend pregnant. Or it's like people who are like flunking out of college and they don't know how to – You just spend the rest of your life answering those. You have to give them actually real energy and real thought into this.

You can't just be flippant when someone gives you that request. Exactly. It's a big responsibility. Occasionally, I would come on and I would help him, and I would do the opposite of what you just said. I'd be like, fuck it, fuck it. Maybe she falls down the stairs. Keep this private private but read this see what is those questions that he got i'd say they could be segmented into like three different

types one third were those deep i really need help and i trust you as an authority figure and i respect your opinion one third was how do i talk to girls and the other third was like I'm masturbating too much how do I stop? Those seemed like the three. And I would pick them like across the spread too, right? It was like alright, here's one that I think is a situation a lot of people would be in. I can help a lot of people with this. You know, here's one that's whatever, kind of funny or maybe I just haven't answered

it before and here's one that will contribute to clickbait titles like oh do you have bloody ejaculate let's get you in because that's a title people will click on so uh i don't like that one yeah i mean some of them i mean i listen i'm a huge fan of dan dan savage i listen to the seven yes yes right so like it's really really cool but uh he has some you know expertise in this you know where like he like farms this out he goes and calls like phds and asks them these questions i like for me like i don't know i think i would be very very hesitant to be giving out large amounts of advice on stream nah i'm a genius we're good um here do you want to read one i i got one this is from yesterday oh this is great.

I'm just scanning it because it's important to me that I keep it anonymous. We should be good. Is this a thank you or is this an actual advice question? This is an advice question. Okay. Unprotected virgin sex need help. Hey, Woody, long time fan here. I'm currently 14 years of age.

Been watching since I was 11. You've given me some great advice and pointers in life. I just lost my virginity to my girlfriend who's also 14. Currently 14 years of age. Been watching since I was 11. You've given me some great advice and pointers in life. I just lost my virginity to my girlfriend, who's also 14. And we've been together for seven months. And we don't see the relationship ending anytime soon. There's one problem with all this. The sex was unprotected.

It lasted for about six minutes, and I pulled out a minute before I finished. Yeah, I pulled out. But there's still that danger of pre-cum and an STD. I had masturbated before I got to her house and peed after that. I read that if you peed after your ejaculation, it gets all the sperm in the shaft out and kills it. With that in mind, I could have eliminated my pre-cum and that's what I'm hoping for.

With all that out of the way, there's still a chance of STDs. We both peed afterwards and even showered afterwards and she should start her period in a couple of weeks, but we're just thinking and waiting for that. The issue is she's sometimes a week late and that will cause both of us to worry even more severely. I'm really just nervous and could use some advice. I don't want to throw my life away at 14 years old. And I hope to have a bright future in front of me.

Ah, he's fine. Any response would be greatly appreciated. It's almost done. Should we tell an adult and get a pregnancy test? If she is pregnant, should we get an abortion? Again, any response would be appreciated. Just keep doing what you're doing. Yeah.

You should decide whether or not he gets him and his 14-year-old girlfriend who you've never met and know nothing about. We know the answer. That's all I need to make it clear. We could totally attack this from a realistic, logical perspective, how to give advice at this point. But when it gets to questions like that,

how do you fucking possibly answer stuff like that? I know exactly what I need to do. First of all, yeah. Kyle, do you want to take it or do you want me to go? Rest easy, little man. There's no chance you knocked her up. And the STD thing, don't even worry about that if you're both virgins. You're so young.

Did the 14-year-olds really? Is there like chlamydia being passed around? Yeah, right? Play school scooter. You're going to be fine. I've got a lot of girls, and I've never, ever gotten an STD. I just really think your chances are low. And even if you do, most of the STDs they can treat now.

That is some of the worst advice I've ever heard. Yeah, you're fine. Don't worry about it. Don't actually say that to people. Here, here, here. Listen, listen. Now is when you need to turn around and go like, okay, I'm fucking kidding. Don't actually listen to me.

Don't tell any adults about this. Adults are nothing but trouble. They don't understand, man. Don't tell anyone. No. Now, if you want a pregnancy test, I'm sure you could acquire one online for free or something I bet there's some website that just send them to you or you could you just really don't need to you see relax you Need to use protection going forward every time

Don't be trying to like pee and masturbate and come up with some sort of a magical no-come thing Don't don't be like don't look at her Ovulation cycle and try to do that don't try to pull out You're gonna get your 14-year-old girlfriend knocked up and ruin the rest of your life unless you're like Sarah Palin's kid or something like that. Don't do that.

Don't do that to your parents or yourself. Use protection. That's the answer. But don't worry. You're fine. That's not too far from the answer I gave him. I told him that 14 struck me as really young to be having sex.

It still does. Having said that... I want to see demos on that before I went one way or the other. It doesn't seem like... It doesn't seem young to you, 14? I didn't see any clues. Kyle, that's offensive. I don't think so.

I think based on his username, I know his first name. So I'm predicting he's a white guy but i can't be sure but um no no no i'm not giving anonymity is important so uh um here i can write it to you i'm kidding oh no no we don't need to know his name that's fine that's fine it's only a guess anyway but uh dude i don't think his girlfriend's pregnant. Uh, the fact that he's a virgin and she's 14, I don't think she has much of a sexual history that lowers the STD risk substantially than both being 14 year olds. They might have both been virgins. He didn't call out her as being a virgin, but that would be careful with that though. You know, you know, the, the

highest risk STD population, you're telling me the highest risk is two virgins. Nope. Nope. The highest risk is actually the elderly right now That's because they don't fucking use protection at all I don't think you should just be like age age equal safety on that but on some level I think you know if I say cows getting it's nearly reasonable in that which is you know use fucking protection It's pretty unlikely pretty unlikely. I'm still going I wasn't saying that age equals protection I was saying that sexual history, to some extent, is related to

STD safety. And if they're both virgins, I mean, grant me that. That makes sense with the elderly thing, though, because they've been going at it since before getting tested was even a thing. They could have had chlamydia since the Eisenhower administration.

They just never know. And now they're just passing it along in the old folks home right and if she's hit menopause and they don't need to worry about babies anymore and so they stop using protection the other thing was um like kyle said wrap it use protection and i sort of went on a responsibility rant with this guy i was like look you're 14 years old and the reason that people think that 14 year olds shouldn't be having sex is that they don't have the wisdom to handle it emotionally, you know, the intimacy and the challenge there, and they don't have the sense of responsibility to do it responsibly. And I'm like, does that sound like you?

Yeah, you want to find an older adult to maybe have these experiences with. Maybe a teacher, maybe some of the faculty. Yeah. All right. I'm of the faculty. Yeah. All right. I'm not getting anywhere with this. All those people under bridges, always willing to help out. You want somebody with a car. That should be what you're going for at 14. Jesus Christ.

It's not only will they have sex with you, but they'll take you to the bouncy castle when you're finished. Wherever you want to go. Burger King, whatever. So yeah, if he's having unprotected sex it strikes me like he just seems like he's not ready to take the responsibility did you not have condoms because you were embarrassed to buy them maybe you're not ready for sex i don't know i'm still embarrassed to buy condoms right it depends what the clerk is right me like i'm not embarrassed to buy condoms at all if it's for you know his parents are particularly like sex negative for example and they don't and he can't

keep condoms in the house because if their parents find them he's in a lot of trouble same with the grown-up being on birth control in my opinion easy to hide a condom you know what makes they're not they're just you know what makes buying condoms less embarrassing buy them in larger quantities right like all right economical way to buy condoms anyway. I'm going to need a hundred pack. I need two hundred packs. What are you, running a whorehouse, little man? That's going to be

my next, like, plaque on the wall. You know what makes buying condoms less embarrassing? Large quantities. While hanging up there. That's not a bad idea just dilute your purchase with other items maybe you want a snickers maybe there's another video they see that coming you know as the cash register lady she's like she's like four snickers bars a coke eight packs of skittles and condoms hmm all right what are you fucking some kids what's your problem

put together like a really interesting shopping list, right? Like, get like four packs of condoms, three zucchinis, some latex gloves, and a plunger and be like alright. And a lot of Crisco. You're like, I don't know what the plunger's for, but take a video. Get one of those party balloon

pumper-ups, like those things where you go kikikikikik, and oh, it's all for a prank. I'm goofing. You could say they're water balloons, I guess you wanted to like be silly about it but like i still order all that stuff off amazon like i ordered i ordered some lube after yeah i ordered my lube off amazon because i like the wet platinum as everyone knows but you can't get it if you go to walmart it's like 11 dollars for this tiny 3.3 ounce bottle and I want that big bottle with the pump on top. So I did a tour of the Armory,

which is where kink.com does all their porn shooting when I was out in San Francisco, and they have tubs. They have the friggin' like you could put a body in them style tubs of lube. That's where you got to go next time. Yeah, giant Breaking Bad vats. There you go. I like the pump bottle, though.

I think it's $45 worth of lube in the pump bottle. It's very expensive, but there's no point in buying those little tiny three ounce bottles. I don't even know how much I have left.

Wet Platinum. Adam and Eve or something, you can get those pump bottles. Wet Platinum sent me a lot of lube. Just tell that kid who wrote in to you that sooner or later if he keeps fucking

with no protection, he's gonna get someone pregnant and he's gonna be in a word of hurt with that so uh let him know that you know that's an 18 year sentence you just did there we go that's right that's right let's never get them sent me a lot of lube as well but i don't care for any of the lube other than the original wet one in the black bottle. Yeah, that's the one. Anytime they add a flavor or like some sort of a special effect to a lube. No, it should just be slippery and wet and non-sticky. That's all you want.

You don't want like KY immediately turns to glue, right? Take KY and like put in your hands and rub them together for, I don't know, about the same amount of time as you would have sex. So like 30 seconds? Not even that long. Yeah, 8 to 12 seconds, you know. Do it hard and fast, you know, make it real. And you'll see, it's like fucking tacky, like glue.

Whereas if you did that with wet platinum, you would be like, holy shit, that's fucking slippery. It doesn't wash off as nicely, though. Like, that's the other side of it. It doesn't wash off it towels off if that makes sense like if you say if you wash your hands and then like take a towel and really like rub it off it's because it's oily it's uh it's it's greasy to it to an extent but it's never sticky wet platinum if you shower down or just you know spray yourself off with it you're pretty much back to bare skin if uh if you do that with no i said it backwards ky you can shower off and you'll pretty much be back to bare skin with wet platinum you

shower off and it beads up like you've been properly waxed yeah i've told the story before but like i uh i bought a fresh bottle one time i got home i had a loft sort of bedroom and i was sort of going to flick it up to the loft so it would and i figured it would land on my bed you know i'd be crafty but it hit it hit the uh the railing up there crashed down the floor the bottle shatters and now i've got like two or three ounces of wet platinum on a hardwood floor and i sort i like toweled it up but i didn't get the mop out and like the mr clean and really scrub that's an all-day endeavor because it was under a table. It was like there was an end table there,

and I figured, you know, who gives a fuck? We moved the furniture around maybe a month later, and I stepped there and just like felt like it was a banana peel on a cartoon. So not instant karma, but still fairly reasonable. Yeah, it's so incredibly slippery. It's got to be something at a molecular level that I don't even know about. Isn't that the story for Astroglide? Which is another lubricant?

Isn't that originally a lubricant space lubricant of some sort? It shouldn't be because it's so sticky. There's no way because it's just Astroglide's junk in my opinion. It's just like KY. They both turn to a sticky glue. I don't care for either one of them. Wet Platinum all the way and they don't

sponsor us like the good people over at Autoblow. Rooting in KY and AstroGlide together is not fair. I'm a big fan of AstroGlide. KY's horrific. So, Kyle, you're not into any... You're not one for the warming or the tingling sensations

that they try and promote. No, because I feel like if there are going to be any natural hot burning feelings, I want to be aware of them immediately. And I feel like if I've got the warming lube, that'll prevent me from ever noticing if for some reason

my genitals do start burning. What if I'm allergic to her vagina? Or something like that. And the next thing I know, I look and my penis is covered in angry welts and blisters again. So here's the thing thing i feel like everyone should know this give me a second we gave some of the flavored wet platinum to a neighbor slash wife's friend and um she got a yeast infection from it and they said that yeah the flavored stuff has sugar in it yeah and and that that creates yeast infections i didn't know that totally does

yeah my wife's like what no no no that's just for like non-vaginal use that's just for oral right like you're not supposed to be i think that's some of it no some of it's internal versus external some of the lubricants say that on them whether or not you're supposed to be using that internally i'm not playing on a slip and slide, I'm fucking ass. We need some internal loot. What you talking about? External loot. I think that should be on the bottle. The bottles that are for internal use should use that exact quote to just really differentiate themselves

from the rest of the market. Are you going slip and slide? I thought not. We're fucking ass, you wet platinum hardwood. That's what I need. Why aren't you sponsored, man? This would be perfect for that. We got a knack for it. That's what I need. Why aren't you sponsored, man? This would be perfect for that. We got a knack for it. Well, we are sponsored by a couple of good sponsors.

I guess it's time. I'm sorry. I meant by that particular sponsor. I know. I had a whole idea for how we could literally I wanted to get like a huge vat of it from them. And I was going to build the world one of the biggest slip and slides in the world. And it was going to be covered with that lube and we were going to go down a hill

on like some sort of tarp that was like a synthetic like I was going to reach out the Devin super tramp for the filming hit a ramp at the bottom then you could do flips and stuff and land in like a lake or something like we were going to so like yeah yeah and part of it was getting our friend wings who

you've probably heard us mention a few times do it it. He's a YouTuber slash streamer, but he's a big guy. He weighs like 425 pounds. So like I was like, it's going to be incredible. Imagine this big guy. Like we'll get models to be like greasing him up with this stuff. see like me slide woody slide taylor slide and you know everybody's doing their back flips and stuff like that and then you just see him like like his profile against a bright blue sky behind him standing on top of a hill wearing a fucking cape and he's just with some music yeah it's got to be some really like and it's just a close-up on those those angry eyes of his like wings of redemption has been training his entire life for a video like this one. Yeah. Gravity, you have been my enemy my whole life. Today, I harness you. He comes running, super Superman slides, and he's just maybe a GoPro just looking at the intensity in his eyes

as he moves close to the speed of sound rocketing toward the bottom. Yeah, he goes past you, and you feel that, like, boom. I wanted it so bad but they they didn't have the budget to pull it off and it just never never went through my wife was not a fan either it's gotta be like a thousand dollars it is what you have that po box now right never know send kyle things covered in lube don't do that the ladies at the post office literally are like my cousin or something like that i'm from the south so the post office literally are like my cousin or something like that i'm from the south so everybody's fucking related but like they know me that

every time i see them in there hi kyle and just just like they've got to like hand give me my packages because i cheaped out got the little po box and you guys send huge stuff so they pile it up in the back so don't send anything somebody sent me a glitter bomb the other day uh and it's basically an envelope full of glitter, and they take a razor and slit the bottom so it spills glitter all over you. But I was too smart for it, and I put it in a plastic bag before I went back to my car. So it's time to talk about Dollar Shave Club. So this episode, as you know, is being brought to you by Dollar Shave Club.

Keeping your face nice and smooth while keeping food on our tables. Apparently some of you still haven't joined Dollar Shave Club and we don't know why. I know. Yeah, it makes no sense. We can't figure it out. Their razors are amazing and it's more convenient. It costs just a fraction of the price. Many people are confused, so we're going to break down exactly how Dollar Shave Club works. So you go to dollarshaveclub.com and pick one of their three great razors. The options are the two-blade humble twin. Now, that's what we use for our genitals around here. We use that because it prevents ingrown hairs.

You don't want a lot of blades down there. You get better angular motion with the two. In the nooks and crannies. You want two blades, not four or six. They also have the four-blade model, which I recommend if you're touching up maybe your armpits, ladies, or your legs or something like that. And then there's the six-blade executive. And now that's what we use on our face.

Now, I personally don't shave my face, but I know that I think that Woody has used the executive on his face, and I think Taylor maybe has as well. I have definitely used it. It's very high quality. You'll feel like a baby's ass for at least like 14 hours, but if you're a long long time to play a baby's ass you want to use the two blade humble twin Don't get confused by that So you sure Fox in about a week who's making noise?

It's a problem someone Can you guys mute yourselves is it me I don't think so whoever just muted themselves you're the problem figured you get your first box in about a week and it includes a free handle and the sleeve of

blade cartridges I get those all the time I have so many sleeves of blade cartridges this is high quality real deal weight, weighty stuff, guys. The handle is what they're talking about. It really feels like it's got some oomph to it. There's no way you're going to break it and drop it. It looks and feels just like the expensive stuff that we used to use. I used to buy those $35 razor packs.

It's the same thing, really. My executive has six stainless steel blades, a 90-degree pivot head, and an aloe strip. You've got to love the aloe. That also prevents irritation. But once again, don't use that on your genitals. It's too many blades. I've never gotten a shave like I do with the six blade razor. And after all, they mail you four replacement blades every month. It seems like I get a lot more than that. Or every other month, if that's better for you. You never have to worry about it again. It's awesome. Yeah. No, in all honesty, I have switched from electric razors to the Dollar Shave Club stuff just because I find that it's a better experience.

And they send the shave butter and I like that and it makes me smell good. And when I smell good, I get laid more. So that's nice. I tried the shave butter again. I gave it another try after you had recommended it and I actually liked it more. The first time I feel like I was just using an old razor blade and that's when I had some irritation but since I've used it, it works pretty well. Yeah. I'm a huge fan of the whole system. I use the Shea Butter. I use their stuff.

You might think that they wouldn't be good quality because they're less expensive but they're way better quality. And then the other thing is the buying experience. I'm an online guy. Some might even say like an agoraphobe. Is that the people who are afraid to go outside? I'll go with that, yes. Filthy?

Who are the people who are afraid to leave the house? I have specialties in psychology, so that's not mine. I have no idea. It might be agoraphobe, but I probably screwed that up. Agoraphobia is heights. Well, anyway, someone out there knows for sure. Don't miss out anymore. It's by dollarshaveclub.com.pk. That's dollarshave someone out there knows for sure. Don't miss out anymore. It's by dollarshaveclub.com slash pka.

That's dollarshaveclub.com slash pka. I think they're doing a special. The club makes a great Father's Day gift, so maybe that's something you want to get involved in. It's the thing that keeps on shaving. I wanted to say the buying experience, right? So I buy everything from Amazon, right? Mostly.

Like if I wanted a 9-volt battery, I'd buy it from Amazon because it would come in two days and it would be guaranteed. And there's like a whole team of people out there in the world making sure that that happens. If it's up to me to actually get my ass out of the house and go to like a drugstore, a week later, I might still not have that nine volt battery. So that's why I do stuff online. And Dollar Shave Club fits the model that I really like. People just deliver that stuff to my house for a really good price. Perfect. Perfect. It's a way

better buying experience than going out and dealing with the lock cases and all that nonsense. I want, I think we should, there should be some kind of a service like Dollar Shave Club, but it's all adult products. Yeah. Right. I actually, condoms and lube and, uh, and the stuff that a lot of people are embarrassed to go pick up. Yeah. we sell condoms dildos auto blows to auto blows auto blows and and really anything this thing is outrageous we're gonna get to this thing more later but just like listen to that listen that kitten purr oh it's absolutely so disgusting when you really look in there. It's really going to work Hey, I got a thing

so Reddit banned fat people hate and subreddit. Yeah, there's actually it shocks I really should get I had the list in front of me earlier, but it was announcements. Let me look. There's been an absolute fat people hate revolution on subreddit maybe the last 36, 48 hours. So, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, I'm very close to finding this. List of subreddits that were banned

so the only really popular one was fat people hate but they also got rid of ham planet hatred trans fags neo fags and a subreddit called shit niggers say oh man jesus christ so these are mod Christ. He's a mod. You were a mod. Jesus Christ. Were those all really small subreddits though? They all had less than the 13th most active subreddit on subreddit. On Reddit. Fat people hate that is. And what happened was the Streisand effect.

If you guys don't know the Streisand effect, in Fast Forward, here's the scoop. Many years ago when satellite views for things like Google Maps, it might have been MapQuest or whatever, came out for the first time, they started, you could like see celebrities houses from above. It was pretty neat, like this is Bill Gates house, this is whatever. Barbara Streisand, I think, sued to not have her house shown in this aerial view. She felt like it was an invasion of privacy. Might kind of be on to something there, but whatever. And because she sued, it brought a lot of attention to her house.

It got way bigger. I've seen her house from the sky. Me too, and I would have no interest otherwise. I wouldn't give a fuck. Yeah, but only because she tried to censor it did it blow up like it did. And I've been on both sides. I've had luck and bad luck with censorship. Sometimes I'll ban a guy or quiet it down or whatever,

and no one notices and the topic's dead and it's great. Other times you try to quiet it and it just gets a thousand times worse than it ever would have been before. This and all have read all of Reddit has temporarily turned into fat people hate. And they're going right after specifically after the CEO, this pal woman. And they're like delving into her past business dealings and past lawsuits. She's been a part of they're going after her husband. and past lawsuits she's been a part of.

They're going after her husband. They're talking about ways in which they feel like she colluded and defrauded to get her position by doing something dirty to some former CEO of Reddit. She's like number one on Punchable Faces, and they've been shadow banning like 30 people there. I saw where she tried to reply to some of this, and she linked her own PM box. The CEO of Reddit didn't know how to use Reddit,

and so she's since deleted the post but like they've of course had mirrors of it and and like image imagers of it and just it's just so much hate is being directed toward the ceo of reddit in particular and the mods uh who are responsible for this it's incredible to see the entire front page of of our all you know just just just everything is is nothing but like SWAT you know calling her a Nazi calling her a fascist calling her a cunt lots of you know search engine optimization so that if you look up her name you'll get like intentional eggs and fat things and things like that actually work so that's why they were doing that some of it yeah a lot of that's intentional to fuck with their Google search results. They're really going after her hard over this fat people hate thing.

And it's really fun to watch that. I don't care. Whenever a community is motivated to do something, whatever it is, it's fun to watch. Just to see people all get behind something. And they are really... I can't think of any bad examples with that in there you know like when the nazis got together we need a final solution like right here now like to see

everybody no like what i mentioned before like world war ii america's auto industry like everybody got together and like we're gonna do this like i feel that's what reddit's doing right now uh against the ceo and against you know what they what they see as a takeaway of their free speech on what's supposed to be sort of an online community that makes its own rules. And that's sort of been the way it's been. The free speech thing is like, I mean, I understand. They're a company. They're a corporation. They don't, like, free speech is in regard to the government.

So the government can't cause you to say something you don't want to. But that company, they can if they want.'s their right i think the users i don't want this promoted here but i think it's shitty that they're you know existing under the auspice that we allow everyone in all consenting opinions and all dissenting opinions rather and then just go about and chop some things that are that's the hypocrisy and then not chop like coontown. But there's a thing. So Coontown might be a good example of the latter. But here's the thing. They're saying that harassment needs to stop. They're not supporting harassment.

So if there was a community involved with their subreddit about doxing people, they would get rid of that. If there's one about hating fat people, they would get rid of that. Harassment is bad, but they're not getting rid of just, what was the term they used for it? Like they're banning behavior, not ideas. They're not getting rid of platforms for people to be offensive, right? You can still be offensive. There's a reason that cute female corpses is still there. It's not about harassing people. It's offensive, no doubt, but it's not targeting people. And I'll admit that sometimes

what's offensive and what's harassment seems like a blurred line there, but they're just trying not to be a platform in which people harass others. And, you know, fat people hate, it almost seemed like it started to be about Boogie for a little while. Like they, if you don't know Filthy Robot, Boogie is a YouTuber and he's a friend of mine and they put his picture on the side of fat people hate boogies over 500 pounds. And it, there was like post after post about boogie, you know, and it got to be kind of a community of a hundred thousand people. I made up that number somewhat Somewhat devoted to picking on a guy. And they got rid of it. Now, I'm sure they didn't get rid of it just

because of Boogie, but there's a difference between harassment and offensive. I don't know. I wonder how differently we would feel if there was a subreddit called Drug Addict Tate. And we were just in it and it focused on people who ruined their lives and the lives of their families with their addiction to drugs. People would react. Would you be like, hey, my friend's a drug addict. lives and the lives of their families with their addiction to drugs would you

be like hey my friends a drug addict and they got his picture on there they're saying look at this guy he's doing cocaine it's his nose is about to fall off like they're picking on him about that he should leave him alone he knows his nose is falling off just let him do his coke let him live his life I hear what you're saying it's a strong counterpoint um but i don't know why someone has to play devil's advocate from the reddit perspective what they're trying to do is get rid of harassment and a lot of people are like well this is an offensive subreddit oh sure you know cute female corpses is allowed so fat people hates not um yeah cute

female corpses i haven't been there in a while disgusting I find that so disgusting I'm not gonna go this is what he forced us that time we had to look at all these dead women it's dead girl I'm feeling a little sick to my stomach now just thinking about we had a different opinion about what was like the hardest to absorb from that um for me the cute female corpses that were mostly intact that maybe had like um a wounded or scared expression were the most difficult to to look at i don't want to talk about kyle well that's tough then don't worry i i got you covered i'll talk about it for kyle. I don't want to listen to you talk.

For Kyle, the most difficult ones to watch were the ones that had horrific injuries. If their face was split open like a V like you might see in a video game, that was hard for him to see. But for me, it was like, that's nothing. But the ones that were connecting with me but dead and lifeless, that was the toughest for me to watch see i understand what you're saying with the whole harassment thing and i agree you shouldn't just have huge communities devoted to like what happened with boogie where it was just a bunch of people like you're right

just bullying him and berating him and being mean but i mean that's what you expect with a subreddit with hate in the name directly addressed them though you know i mean he's sort of like i felt like he had a dialogue going, you know, he made a video about them. Yeah, but my point is that this harassment thing, like what constitutes it? Like, is it, can one person from one community start being a real dick and trying to get

personal information and being mean, and then they can use that as a rationale to shut down the whole forum if that fits their agenda? So it seems like it's a blurred line that's very easy to exploit by someone who very clearly just wants to get rid of dissenting opinions. That's one of the biggest complaints. Totally understandable.

That's one of the biggest complaints that comes from the supporters of the fat people hate because what people have been doing for a long time, not fat people hate has been going on for a while. It's gotten really hot in the last month or so. But even before then. I think we were part of that. I really do. Yeah, we definitely fan the flames. i don't like fat people um so what happened was awful i mean they're uncomfortable to be around what are you talking about like i don't know why everybody's like yeah come on you don't like fat people nobody does i mean you don't you gotta prefer everybody to be happy don't we would we prefer if everyone were healthy and and you know to you know they fit neatly in the seats and stuff?

I could take it beyond that. I would think, ideal world, everyone, male, female, everyone were the exact same size. It would make it easier for buses and airplanes and everything to just make the world fit us appropriately. I'm just trying to make sure that when we have a fire and we're going down the fire escape that we all survive. We don't get stuck behind you. Come on. That's all Carry on what were you saying? Remind me what was my track? Where did I sound like I was going? Uh you were something about the popularity of fat people hate blowing up lately

Oh So so one thing people will do is they'll go on there and make their own like sort of posts on there that are really Over the top like they they they violate the rules of Reddit just because they're trying to give that subreddit even more of a bad name than they should have. Now if you think that they're making fun of fat people broadly and abstractly is cruel, that's one thing. But sometimes people go in there and they'll be like, look, this is Linda Marker, here's her Facebook, she's a fat cow, get her! And it's just like, whoa, whoa, whoa, that's against the rules of Reddit. You can't do that. And they were claiming

that many examples of the really over-the-top nasty stuff were people who hate fat people hate. Think about that. They are against the subreddit. They're putting those posts in there to make the subreddit look even more diabolical than they actually are. Oh, like putting plants in there to make them look even worse than they were. There's a term for that. It's French, and they do it in protests a lot. It's like, ah, does anyone know this? Surrender.

Fate accomplice or something like that? Oh, that sounds familiar. That sounds French. Anti-protester. Accomplice. that sounds sounds French type protester please yeah but yeah it's totally not cool to be harassing people at all like you shouldn't be doing they should be putting information out and being a dick for no reason but I also see how when any community gets hit to a critical mass, there's going to be shitheads. It could be a community about hating cancer

and like, fuck cancer. Cancer is evil. It hurts everyone. And there's going to be somebody on there who's going to go wish cancer on somebody or maybe probably multiple people because there are shitheads on the internet. And when a critical mass is reached,

it's inevitable. People are going to be mean. Do you want to weigh in on this, Filthy? Nope. You got to take a side, Filthy! Come on, Filthy! Part of what you're doing though is you're, you know, honestly, this is the first I've heard of this,

so I don't have a strong opinion this one way or the other, but part of what I see from this is you're you're creating a culture right a culture that has some things that are acceptable and some things not so if you look at like like like anti-gay bashing or something like that right you know if you can go all right well we're not going to limit your your ability to have that you can't target individuals but you're still promoting a concept that's essentially something you don't want promoted this is something you really don't want to encourage or allow or be allowed to even thinking that this is acceptable. So I don't know.

You're right. There's not a direct, immediate victim, but doesn't this come through? Yeah, but gay people deserve protection. They deserve our protection, and they deserve – because it's not a choice that they've made. They're just born gay. Okay, well, you're starting to get into a little bit of trouble because – all right, so what about fat people with medical conditions? Should they not be picked up? That's a very small slice of the population of the fat people i have no problem with those people actually lots of fat people have medical conditions because they're caused by their yeah what about what about fat

people who are poor and therefore have access to lower quality foods these are bad foods for you know this kind of argument like that. Where are you applying personal responsibility? Do you remember when I talked about eating the whole loaf of banana bread and the large pizza today? Come on, you just don't eat tomorrow. I'll work out. I'll jog. I'll work out a little bit. The whole not having access to foods because they're less expensive. There's a Walmart near everyone.

There's a Walmart produce section. it may not be gmo3 hold on the whole the point is not that you need to knock each of these down as they come i mean you can if you want but the point is to point examples right where you where do you say personal responsibility ends and personal responsibility begins if that is the criteria you're using to say one is acceptable to discriminate against one is i i i still like my thing where where i thought that fat people hate was analogous to poor people hate. In either case, all it really takes is a lifetime of discipline and you'll get yourself out. If you go to school at night while you're working during the day, if you just live your life in a disciplined manner, then you can solve each of those problems.

There's nothing that confines you to poverty in a permanent way. You can work your way out of it. And the same is true with being too heavy. Does research support that? Aren't we seeing things like less and less people actually doing that? Isn't it almost always now like a really, really high direct relationship between how you're born economic level to how you die economic level? Are we actually seeing these breakouts? My dad did it.

I don't think we are. I think that is the very low percentage of the cases we're seeing for this. I don't know about the stats, but I feel like that's an excuse. I feel like that people who – it's a very popular message right now that Bernie Sanders is capitalizing on saying that, Leo, your lot in life has nothing to do with you. It's not your fault. You were just born into the wrong thing. has nothing to do with you. It's not your fault.

You were just born into the wrong thing. If there is a correlation, then I would argue that that correlation has more to do with expectations from your parents and how you behave in school and what happens after you finish high school and what they think is the normal route for you to take. If your parents say, yeah, after high school you're going to get a job as a gopher on a construction site,

then that's not because you were forced into it. It's because you were guided into it. But you can absolutely work your way into nearly any position in America anyway. You can, and I understand what you're saying, but I'd still argue that it is person by person. And for most people, I would say overwhelmingly, it's much easier to lose weight than it is to work your way out of poverty. Who here has been overweight? All three of us, right? We've all three felt like we've been at least 10, 20 pounds heavier than we should be. I've been like 40 pounds heavier than I should be.

I have too. I was 225, I'm 172 pounds right now and I feel like I'm in like decent shape. And I was 225 pounds when we were in Chicago that time. So since then I've lost 50 fucking pounds of fat. And you just gotta take responsibility for it and it's not fun and it's not glamorous and it's a lot of fucking grilled chicken that tastes bad and salads and running until you're exhausted and your legs are numb. But that's what you do if you don't want to die an early death at 50 with some horrible disease that human beings shouldn't even get.

I feel like that's analogous to me. It's not as easy as people try and make it, though. So my father, and fast forward, I know my fans know this already. He was born poor. His parents were both first-generation immigrants. His father was an alcoholic who beat my grandmother, aunt, and my father, the other three of them. And he ran out when they were 10.

So my grandmother worked as a cashier at JCPenney's, which is kind of like a Macy's, and supported the family barely. He put himself through college. He ended up with a master's degree. He started his own accounting firm, and he did really well. He didn't pay for my college.

Instead, I went to night school. I worked during the day. I paid myself through college. I ended up with two bachelor's degrees, one master's degree. I can't hang with Filthy, but I did okay. And then I worked as an accountant and then I eventually worked as a software, as a programmer and software architect and all the way through. And these to me are both, now I may have had the benefit of expectations, you know, like, go ahead Kyle, you're trying to jump in. Okay, so here's my question.

I've never really put this, put two and two together here. I've heard this story you're telling in particular multiple times and I'm not getting tired of it. I enjoy hearing it. You're very kind. No, I mean that sincerely. But I know that you and I have talked about how you've, you know, been planning to provide for your own children for

since they were born. You know, Hope had that account when she was an infant that started accruing money for her college. Why didn't your dad pay for your schooling? Because I bought a motorcycle. It stopped when I bought a motorcycle. He felt, he did this thing where, so at first he did, like the first year and a half or something like that. And, but he would do this thing, like if he gave me a hundred dollars and then I spent like any hundred dollars in a way he didn't approve of, like, hey, I bought a video game. Oh, so that's where my hundred went. And I bought a motorcycle and it was like, all right,

cut it off. I don't know why I'm helping with his tuition or anything like that, you know, because he's doing that. The motorcycle was a thousand dollars. Like, it wasn't like a really, it wasn't nothing, but that's what it was. Were you able to continue going to the same school after he cut you off like that? Yeah, I just fucking made it happen.

Yeah, this was the moment. Do you feel like you could, if he had continued to pay, how do you think that would have altered your existence? What would you have done with the, would you have worked fewer jobs, or would you have continued with the same working night school and earning a living the whole time? And what do you think would have been different if he had continued to pay for your schooling all the way through?

It would have been easier. So at the time I had my own business, a job and school at night, like I did those three things. And probably like when he was like, when he cut off me paying for tuition, it was like, all right,

I need more clients in my own business. Back in the day day people let new like the typical person knows more about computers now than they did in say 93 or something when this was and so I would like go into a small businesses accountants attorneys doctors offices things like that and I would network their computers together I'd be like you know they could all share a printer and they're like awesome and and I would like you know set that up I would just create small networks and put these things together and give them a share give them a backup at least so I made sure that that business thrived enough so that I would have enough to pay for tuition okay so how would I have

been if I didn't have to work that hard? Would you? So I bet you'll agree with me that having to work that hard to really do it all on your own, for the most part, it seems you had the expectations there and you had that money for a short time in the beginning. But it seems like you shoulder the responsibility of all of that stuff and then later laying on the added bonus of a family. But do you if you could go back and change it would you don't you feel like you learned so much from having to work that hard didn't it give you an appreciation for money for uh for what for what your time is worth for what uh you know you could be doing and it doesn't make you appreciate what you have now more am i am i i think it injected some frugality into me and you know even when i started earning enough to make things go, the frugality kind of stuck around.

I can remember in particular, I don't know if this is boring for everyone, but we'd go shopping and I couldn't afford orange juice. And orange juice is fairly expensive, especially for what you get, right? It's like a half gallon for so many dollars out at my wife's shops. But I'd look at it and I'd just be like, ah, that's not the kind of splurge I can afford right now.

And, you know, that kind of being broke sticks with you a bit and it makes you value money. Look at you now, Mr. Fancy Milk. Although, to kind of comment on that though, I mean, like, if you're living that close where orange juice is splurging, right? I mean, you're a one one you know rng from fucking failure right right if you have one major life problem like a health issue come up or like your motorbike stops working or you know your business for whatever reason quits or you're you need a new computer at that point you're that that close to not making it and then to turn around and then say you know to these the people who are like you should be able to do this kind

of ignores the power of the situation on that right so what about the person who was like you right you know doesn't have the funding from their parents or going to college the college is going to give the education that's going to allow them to create the rest of their life and then you know instead they have you know problems like health health problems in the family right you know like maybe they're sick or their mother's sick or something like this where they have to go and take care of that and that opportunity's gone to them and then suddenly it's their fault as well that they they're not they're not able to make this financial ends meet yes and i'll tell you why because i did have those problems right i had uh like a wisdom teeth for example that put me out of work for three weeks it just went horribly wrong i have

the worst wisdom tea story that i know of and um yeah i freaking recovered i had a time i was working i only had two things i had one job at this point, but I worked at it like 110 to 125 hours a week. And I also had a long commute from North Jersey to Philadelphia to go to school. Well, it snowed. It snowed more than I could handle. And my, I don't know what it was, maybe an hour long commute to school would sometimes become like a three hour commute. And I would just catch like the very end of night school. And, uh, there was a semester where I pulled triple F's, right? I took three classes at a time and I got an F in all of them. I was on academic probation. It, it was a bad scene, you know? So what did I do? Freaking sign back up, make sure I get good grades, fix it,

take those classes again, and don't let a loss turn you into a loser. It's hard, you know, but... See, I think you're both making really valid points here. Like, Woody's right in that some people do take circumstances and make it seem like, oh, this is insurmountable, why even try hard? And they allow themselves to talk themselves out of it. But Filthy's right in that this is it's all on a gradient like if a bad wisdom tooth story is certainly different than being in a catastrophic

car crash where you know it's 45 000 50 000 of debt that's pretty much like you're you're kind of fucked so it's or you roll the dice that one time with your first girlfriend at 14 and you're not rolling blanks after you know yeah there are a lot of contingencies in all in in these scenarios that's the point i'm making so i think i have a hard time to i mean you're saying i'm offering the alternative perspective specifically to move towards kind of the midpoint there which is that i don't think you can say one way the other i don't think you can say like you know people are poor it's their own it's because they're not working hard enough i don't think at the same time you can say you know you can just absolve personal responsibility for

anything you know of course that you know just absolve personal responsibility for anything. Of course, you have to be responsible for doing the shit that's going to get you somewhere too. Exactly. There is a middle ground there. You have to work hard to be successful. That's a given unless you're born into a wonderful family where you get a lot of money. But at the same time, there are people who no matter how hard they work,

they're not going to get the opportunity to be successful. It's just not possible absolutely absolutely you know they're and the guidance helps a lot right like there are people who work super hard and just don't work hard at the right things i don't see what kyle is doing he's messing with me um but uh he's saying something but i can't make it out what it is either he's in the center of the screens on the Skype, and it looks like he's looking directly at me, and I'm like, what the fuck? Because my camera is like... Yeah, right there, right?

And I'm so conceited that I always just kind of... He's wearing a shirt of himself. That I just kind of look at myself the whole time. So I might be talking to you, but don't worry. I'm looking right at me. I'm like, you're looking good talking to me. Keep it up. Good job.

All right. I'll throw right at me. I'm like, you're looking good talking. Keep it up. Good job. All right. I'll throw this out there. If I had had a baby at 16 years old, I bet I'd still have a good job and stuff. It'd just be like, yeah, my story now involves having to take care of a kid at home and this and that. And I'd just keep driving until I get to where I want to be. I can just imagine you on the motorcycle, kid strapped to your back, he's holding your books. It is possible that you'd still be a really successful

person and that would be another peg in the adversities that you overcame, but it's also possible that that would be the straw that broke the camel's back. That would be, in conjunction with everything else, what kind of prevented you from not being successful, but from achieving the level of success you've had.

That's true. I had a kid when I got my master's degree yeah that yeah you weren't 16 when you got your master's degree no doogie Howser so yeah other kids were having sex he was getting his masters but um but anyway my point is like you know fat people pay hate and poor people hate yeah to some extent it's the role model right the last the household that you were given growing up with they give you different eating habits and buying habits and expectations of what you're supposed to look like you know if your mom is fat and your dad is fat and then you're fat they're not really on you like whoa you look, you're getting a little out of control here. It's the normal for you.

And that to me is analogous to what can happen with being broke. In either case, you know, a little discipline and I don't feel like the formula of study hard, go to college and get a decent job is a secret. You know, everybody knows that every like everyone i know knows that maybe if i went to certain inner city i bet they'd still know it they just don't consider it an option for themselves but it is um so anyway yeah and but i where i was headed with this when i first started is i don't know that i could get on board with the poor people hate. Like, it still just seems too mean-spirited. Yeah, yeah, I definitely don't...

Well, alright, I just feel like that nobody ever... Like, I don't think making poor people feel bad about themselves... ...didn't trip and fall into being fat. They ate their ho-hos until they were fat. Is it okay to pick on those ones? I can pick on those ones, right? Like, if they just, like, did it to themselves because they just really like ho-hos until they were fat. Is it okay to pick on those ones? I can pick on those ones, right?

Like if they just did it to themselves because they just really like ho-hos? You can pick on whoever you want. It's just kind of shit. Yeah, but I would have been like, without you looking down your nose at me like I'm all cruel and stuff. No, I understand.

If you tie it, I mean, it's like, you're right, it's a self-imposed problem. It's people who can't seem to get their lifestyle in check. But again, that just seems to, there's a mirror in the poor thing. Every day someone takes another group away that I can't make fun of. And I'm down to just a few. And I just don't know how much more I can take. Every day somebody's getting a support group.

Damn liberals. They're becoming activists and shit. They're getting groups and their own subreddits and shit. No, stop it. A line must be drawn here. You got to stop them now. Filthy, can you help us out? Who can Kyle hate?

Nazis. All right, so I got some AMA questions here. Oh, can I say something in five seconds? Of course Agent Provocateur is the fake protester So what happens is you have a protest It's peaceful, they want to break it up Agent Provocateur might be a cop

Dressed like a protester who breaks a rule And gives them the excuse they need to disperse it Carry on It's a common practice with Americans Riot control There are lots of examples of that During recent riots. Okay.

Where they send cops in and just act shitty for the sake of making a news clip. They're like, look at them. Look at how they were acting. Not the news clip, but they want an excuse to disperse the crowd. If the crowd's sitting there chanting, holding arms, and being peaceful. Sometimes all it may take is as soon as they they throw a brick then we go to like stage orange When in you know that's what they want like stage orange They get pepper spray people or something and then ever and they're all jerk and it wanted to let that pepper spray loose

you know they are so all you need is one fake protester to throw a bottle and Now the police have a license to do what they want to do. Get your mice boys They're always ready. Okay, so I've got these AMA questions. One of them was Civ related, so I thought I'd roll through this one really quick. Hey guys, I know you have touched on it, but what is your favorite Civ in Civ 5 and what is your favorite victory condition or the one you normally go for? Also,

your favorite unique unit and favorite unique building. That's a lot of questions. I really should just let you go first, Filthy. Oh, I thought these were your AMAs for you guys. I thought I was just going to sit and listen. Right. There's no way you're getting out of this one.

All right. Persia is probably my favorite Sith. It's so flexible. You can do anything you want with Persia. You get better bonuses towards war, bonuses towards production, and bonuses towards culture, which are all friggin' amazing. They have a happiness building. Happiness is growth.

Growth is science. Science is victory condition. So it's friggin' amazing there. Persia, you know, victory conditions in multiplayer is only one victory condition. It's the domination. That's the only victory condition that matters. Even if you win culture or science, you basically won a domination victory by preventing your opponents from killing you. So that's the only one that's available.

Persia has a really strong early unique unit, which is the Immortal. So that's nice early game domination, so it works out quite nicely there. Any of the early game units are really the ones that are going to be my favorite unique units, because they come into play early and they shape the rest of the game. If you have the German unique unit, you have the Panzer or something, yeah, alright. When the game's already decided, you have a unique unit that rolls around. Who cares? It doesn't do anything. It could be the greatest unique unit ever, but panzer or something yeah all right when the game's already decided you have a unique unit that rolls around who cares it doesn't do anything it could be the greatest greatest unique unit ever but most time most of the time it doesn't matter and is there another part to that yeah put it in the skype to help you yeah uh favorite unique unit favorite

building uh favorite civ um i think you got it all maybe well i think i would just go with persia in general it's amazing there's lots of those are all individual questions and it took too long to do yeah that's hard um i think poland's my favorite they seem like the easiest to play if anything they're just so balanced uh and they get they get the uh pretty much an extra tree of culture uh policies throughout the whole game uh and with the new uh the the modded version i feel like i want to get as many of those policies as i can now we're pretty much from a bit we pretty much insta-ban uh poland every single time in the mod games because it's too strong. Fair enough.

Okay. It's funny that Poland of all places. It's like, oh, fuck, Poland. How many Polacks does it take? Just one. Just one. They're so strong. Okay.

Well, then, okay. If there's no Poland, I don't know. I like Babylon. I like getting that free scientist at writing Maybe swinging that into just a couple of science buildings back to back to back It's just fucking with my head like the the switch in conversation from we're just talking about to like sim like favorite unique building But that's like a total 180 of what we're just welcome to PKA What is I think Arabia has like Bazaar, I think,

that gives them an extra copy of the Luxuries, which seems really nice. And I don't know, unique units? I don't know. The Hoplite are kind of cool. They come early. Greece is general. I've often had bad games against Greece

because they'll have Companion Cavalry and Hoplite so early and just chew my Longbowmen apart or something like that and make a mockery of me. And then they're all their city-states allies early. I hate Greece. That's my least favorite civ. I feel like we answered the civ questions, right? Like we've done it in like an hour.

Sure. Can we get an update on the landlord situation? Kyle hates me. Yeah, I don't care. I never did anything else with the landlord situation. I told Kitty if she wanted to pursue it, she could. I don't care. I never did anything else with the landlord situation. I told Kitty if she wanted to pursue it, she could. I don't care. I didn't want to deal with a headache.

You got to go to like some, like, I'd have to get some law enforcement official or go to some court somewhere and get somebody to like... The guy stole 10 grand, right? Yeah, yeah. I would care. Stole 10 grand from him? Yeah. He debited my account, my last landlord, uh about 10 grand over the course of a year

he had his landlord his landlord had the ability to withdraw the rent from his account and he withdrew an extra ten thousand dollars because he wanted it like there was no like damage situation this isn't a close call he just kind of robbed him because he had his account details yeah yeah yeah but i don't know what to do about that. And no one can give me a really clear answer. So I just don't know what to do. If only we had like half a million people ready to make his life hell. Not only.

I mean, let me see. Only to steal thousands and thousands of dollars. I think his name was Chris, right? Let me, maybe Chris. Thieving landlords is a group you can hate, Kyle. No, give his name out. Give his address out. Someone needs.

I'll find it for next episode. If you guys. If this guy fucking did this to me and I'd be Liam Nielsen on I Would not let this go I would I would be on him all the time There'd be a whole world of people that knew what a dirtbag he was it would be his nightmare he would be begging me for an opportunity to pay me back I would fuck with this you look into regal legal recourse is to begin with right this is this is not just lazily I don't know what to do I don't know how to find out what my legal

recourse is are like just talking to an attorney? For ten grand it seems like a pretty easy step. My attorneys are like specialized. Attorneys are like doctors. It's like I don't have an ear, nose, and tongue. They'll redirect you to the appropriate specialization and three phone calls later you get ten grand. You have no idea how many lawyers I already have. I hate dealing with these motherfuckers. I've got three different lawyers that do three different things for me now and they range from four hundred dollars an hour to two hundred dollars

an hour and i you don't want to have a phone conversation because you get a bill for that five minutes how many uh how many at four hundred dollars an hour how long does it take to get ten grand you would hope a day and it would be done right kyle i love my attorney and she doesn't have the problem that you're talking about okay Okay. Would you like, I mean, I feel like if you called her, I almost guarantee... Someone in Georgia to do Georgia things. I don't think that's true.

Last time I used an attorney aside from her, he was in California. There's no reason not to try, Kyle. It's $10,000. Someone needs to do something in the Georgia court system to make this guy responsible. That's what it would take. And I don't know what the statute of limitations is on credit card fraud.

I suppose that's what he did to me. I imagine what she does is she gets the district attorney to take action on this thing. I would imagine that too. Yeah, and I bet she could do that. And it probably will be a pain in the ass. But as a matter of, someone's just stolen $10,000 from you. There's two sides of it. One, I'd like the ten grand two it's really fucking

important to me that you don't have it right like that's the the bigger thing like you know me like i don't mean to be a total douche about it but like it i could do it i can i'll give a fuck yeah and fucking take your ten grand if i could use it to start a fire at which he's burnt at the fucking stake, that would be a good use of my $10,000. It's not about the 10 grand. My dream scenario would be that he was like, well, I don't have it. I don't have 10,000 cash. And the court was like, okay, well, we'll be showing up to your residence

with some officers and Mr. Kyle here, and he's gonna be take his pick of your belongings yeah they're like a jet ski looks nice and jewelry your wife got yes got on yeah that shit you got on yeah their- like that shirt! Give me that fucking shirt he's got! Yeah! I want your whole outfit. Right now. No, you can't go to the bathroom and change! Get out of here! $150 per boob squeeze. Does that sound fair to you? I don't know about that. I want some Game of Thrones justice though, where they're like- I want some like- I want a judge like Joffrey to be there, like really cruel and just like- Like, oh, you owe him ten thousand!

Hmm... That'll be four fingers. That's what I'm saying. Everyone, every man needs hands, sir. Oh, excellent. We'll cut his tongue out then. Like, I need that. I would love to take my pick of his personal belongings

or something like that. But yeah, you're right. You need a lawyer, and then I think they got to do, like, nudge the district attorney and make him do something. It's just hilarious that your first recourse was you're like, I'll reach out to Reddit before reaching out to a lawyer. That sounds just like mildly absurd to you. I just – it's just such a – I've got so many annoying things like that in my life where it's just like,

God damn it. Really, I've got to go through all these steps to get – why did this guy have to steal from me? I didn't do anything wrong. Just I hate being a victim but but everybody it's uh you know i feel like i didn't do anything wrong in that situation i always paid my rent on time never late and uh and he just stole shit from me and he just just a real scumbag yep i didn't notice it that uh that i won the death pool yes let's fire up another death pool. Filthy, are you familiar with death pools?

I just very briefly was browsing your YouTube before we logged into this, and I saw, I think I actually read it some form, maybe saw something about a death pool, and you're betting on people who are dying? Yeah, so about 40 weeks ago, we made a death pool, and we each put in $25.

We didn't actually do it, but we each committed $25. And we got to pick two people. I picked Nancy Reagan and someone else. I'm going to go to the subreddit and find it. I picked Ozzy Osbourne and Rod Stewart. Ozzy Osbourne is never going to die. Foolhardy choice. And Taylor picked Christopher Lee and

someone else. Kirk Douglas. But I think we all had good choices. But Christopher Lee, Sauron the White, died. You're right. Sauron totally died

today. I think he was 93 years old. He was Tolkien's first choice to play Gandalf and a very good actor. That was a shame. But Taylor wins! Taylor wins. It says here that Taylor gets $75, but I think Taylor gets $50.

Is Wings in it? I don't know. I'm just teasing. I'm looking at the thing. It appears that Kyle, Woody, and Taylorings in it? I don't know. I'm just teasing. Yeah, I'm looking at the thing. It appears that Kyle, Woody, and Taylor are in it. I don't know why I used myself as a third person. And so he gets $50. $25 from Kyle and $25 from me.

And $25 from himself if he chooses. All right, so do you want a new death? That's what I'm thinking. I feel like he should just chip in a new person because I totally want to stick with Rod Stewart and Ozzy Osbourne. I feel like they're both old and frail. And they both have active lives where a heart attack could happen any moment. They've both done tons of damage to their hearts over the years

with all the drug abuse. Both these guys, ticking time bombs. I have an idea. It's the dangerous way to do it. You guys were picking it based on prior lifestyles, or at least Kyle was. I just found the two. I just Googled oldest like, oldest celebrities, and Christopher Lee was on the list,

and Kirk Douglas is on the list, and I knew that would pay out. Muhammad Ali and Nancy Reagan seemed like good picks to me. I still like them. Alzheimer's on both of them have degenerative brain disorders. Yeah, but here's what I think we should do. We should add a third pick, but with a twist. This pick needs to be under 40.

Yeah, under 40. So there's not an old age thing, right? You need to find the next River Phoenix, right? The next Amy Winehouse. Someone who just looks... Yeah. Who's your under 40, Filthy? Who's the under 40? I thought you said you had one.

Yeah, I do. Alex Hinald. You know who you want it? Alex Hinald. Do you know who this guy is? Alex Hinald? No. Free solo rock climber. Oh, I know that guy. I love that guy. He's a good chick.

He's incredible. He's incredible. He's amazing. I'm a big rock climbing fan. I do rock climbing myself. He's absolutely incredible. But shit, this is just a numbers game, right? Sooner or later, you're fucked.

Yeah, I want that. I got him. I'm locking in. That's my guy, Alex Hinal. And I like it because he lives a healthy lifestyle. Well, sort of a healthy lifestyle. He's healthy. Dude, so I actually wrote about that guy on Reddit.

It was interesting because this guy from the neck up kind of looks like maybe your neighbor, like a cute sort of guy or whatever. From the neck down, he is one version of a perfect human specimen, right? Like he's not fat. He's super strong. And clothed, you wouldn't even sort of notice it. He's broke, I think. Does he still live in a van by the mountain? I think it's by the river, but I think that was by intention, I believe.

I don't know if that actually reflects on his financial status. I can't believe none of us picked Leonard Nimoy. That would have been a strong pick. That would have. I know one of my next ones. Go ahead. Abe Vigoda. He was in The Godfather.

Oh. 94 years young. What an asshole. Oh, there's another thing. This is a standard death pool rule. If he dies within two weeks, it doesn't count. Yeah, because you can't pick someone who's currently in the ER or anything like that. Fuck that.

I think it should be double your money if he dies within two weeks. No, because this is what would happen. Like, I run a lot of death pools. I'm kind of an asshole. And people would, like, someone would get into a skiing accident, and they'd quick, like, you know, all right, I got whatever, this person. fools I'm kind of an asshole and uh people would like someone would get into a skiing accident and they'd quick like you know all right I got whatever this person and you're like no no no you know she's on life support right now you can't pick her so you have to do two weeks out

that way I agree with that yeah I'm gonna re-up my list with Abe Vigoda and Buzz Aldrin oh so you dropped Kirk Douglas. No, I thought we were picking three now. Oh, is one of them under 40? One of them died. One of them has to be under 40. Yeah, so I'm going to go with Abe Vigoda and Kirk Douglas, and I've got to find my under 40.

This may take a week to decide before I spontaneously pick someone next week on the show. Well, I'm going to pick Valerie Harper if I can pick a long-term one because she just got lung cancer a couple years ago. She's not gonna make it much longer. But I need a young one, huh? Jesus Christ. I mean, come on.

She's like, she's already old. She's got lung cancer now. That's true. Smoking those camel shoes and short pants. This is difficult under 40. I mean, I think that the rock climbing, that has to be one of the best choices. What's more dangerous than free rock climbing? You get one mistake.

One. Yeah, that's, uh, rock climbing, uh, it seems pretty terrifying to me. Especially if you're free climbing like that, but with no, no safety, uh, no, no rope, like keeping them from, you know, one, one fall, you're dead. Ah. I don't even know who's under 40. Frankie Muniz. I'll take Frankie Muniz. I have a near-death experience with rock climbing. Share that. Oh, really?

Yeah, tell us, definitely. So, do you guys know anything about rock climbing at all? I've done the indoor. Generally, you try and go up. Okay, so you've got the basics down. But, okay, so put any of the terminology, for example. Which one had the basics down? okay any of the terminology which one had the basics down the one that had done the indoor rock climbing or the one that said generally you go up i was i was responding to generally goes up okay so okay if you've done indoor rock climbing i mean

i do mostly sport sport climbing is the type of climbing i do and there's lead and top roping top roping you know but that's what you're doing in the gym when the rope's already up there right you start at the bottom you have a rope you attach you climb up the climbing you're you start with the you're climbing up with the rope essentially and clipping the rope to um protective gear in the rock as you go up right so what this means is that um you're climbing stretches where initially you have no protection and then you're climbing stretches where you're above your protection so you have longer falls there's something you can do if you improperly clip in it's called back clipping where you can do it in such a way that when you fall your protection might rip

out. So I was climbing on a route that we thought was a different route and it was a route that was harder than the grade at which I normally climb. It was a lead climb so there's protection in the rock, they're bolts I clip into, but I'm not yet to them. So I start at the base of the route with no protective gear. I'm climbing the rope up and clipping in as I go. And I get to the first one, and I clip in. And then I'm climbing the next bolt. This is probably 20 foot up, maybe 30 foot up, something like that, as I get to the second clip.

Do I have it right in that the maximum distance you can fall is twice the gap between the clips? Yeah. Okay. So 30 feet, you could fall 60 feet. Well, no. This particular route, the one I'm clipping is 30 foot up. So probably I'm clipped in 15. So I'm going to fall 30 foot if I fall this.

But it's going to be a 30-foot fall onto rock. Okay. And I clip in. I'm getting up to the second one, my arms are given out and I'm, uh, pretty close. I'm, I'm,

I'm sitting there going, I don't know if I can make this clip or not. And if I fall and I have the protection, right, I've already clipped in beneath it. So all it's going to be is a fall into rope, which is no big deal. You do that all the time.

You're not climbing. And it's, you know, that's totally acceptable. You fall into rope. It's no big deal. So I'm climbing up to this and I'm just trying to make the decision. And I,

I do eventually decide, okay, I'm going to go for it and I don't think I'm going to make it, but just go for it and if i take a big fall so big i take a big fall i have protection and i get the clip in and then i realized as i look down that i've somehow back clipped my first point of protection so i was making a decision to basically say oh i'll just let go and fall onto my rope but if i'd done that i would have fallen just 30 foot straight into rock with no protection at all because i just clipped the first clip and i'm like good thing you made it yeah yeah that was a exciting route to be on we wouldn't be able to learn about to rock with no protection at all. Because I just clipped the first clip. Good thing you made it.

Yeah, that was an exciting route to be on. We wouldn't be able to learn about Sib anymore. That would just be the worst. Yeah. Talk about one mistake, right? I figured out what back clipping is. My hands are getting sweaty right now. Just listening to you talk. You can picture a carabiner

and it looks like as the rope would pull down it would open the carabiner is that what back clipping is yeah exactly but something basically some variation on that is what happened i have no idea to this day exactly what happened i clipped it wrong in some way when i did the first point of protection that basically after the fact that i moved on past that first point of protection it's pulling on the rope and just regular movement somehow dislodged that point of protection, and it shouldn't have. So clearly I clipped it wrong in some way,

but I could have died doing that. Scary. Jesus, dude. Do you still do that really often? Like, is this a hobby of yours? Yeah, I mean, currently they close the... So the girlfriend and I do that together, and we do mostly indoor stuff most of the year,

and then we go for a couple rock climbing trips you got trips a year that's what we tend to do for the outdoor stuff they just recently closed one of the closer gyms to me so when we move again we'll be getting back into it again it's been like probably about eight months or something since I've been last but in general we like the highest you've ever gotten like on a outside rock face okay well I do single pitch stuff so I don't I don't do multi-pitch stuff so like the the really big climbs are gonna be multi-pitch so you do basically the length of what you're roping up then i've done a hundred foot climb but that's about it have you ever done ice climbing i don't

really like the idea of ice climbing i hate to be fucking cold and the idea of going to do like exertion like on ice where you're like you know gloves and cleats and shit just really kind of kills the joy of rock climbing to me my favorite rock climbing we did it uh is a wall in uh the new river gorge in west virginia it's a wall that is like about five foot the wall of rock right about five foot from a lake and you go climb this up you go climb up and you get down you come back and go for a swim afterwards and it's like beautiful like summer afternoon where you're doing like exertion and really cool like thrilling rock climbing and then like a swim in the lake like the idea of that sounds awesome that sounds awful it sounds like for me that trip would be climb eight feet up vomit out of fear and then go home

my friend did rock climbing a lot and um he seemed to enjoy the equipment as much as the climbing like he'd do grandfather mountain in north car, and he'd come back with all these pictures of his knots and his carabiners and things like, no horizon, no lake, no, like, camping stories, just, like, look at this stuff I did. And that was part of why he liked ice climbing. It was, like, once he had figured out, like, not to be, he was a good climber,

but, like, once he had figured out all the knots and stuff, he wanted to move on to the next thing, and ice is a whole nother set of gear and equipment to master and that that seemed to be his draw has anyone here ever seen cliffhanger yes everyone's seen clean i love cliffhanger i think it might be uh sylvester salone's second best movie only to rocky uh and that's not saying too much because he's made a lot of shitty movies but i love fucking cliffhanger uh we watched that just the other night I hadn't seen it in a few years but yeah you were talking about

getting sweaty palms I was getting sweaty palms watching Sylvester Stallone climb there's a scene at the beginning where he's climbing up this rock face and then it sort of like goes out like this so he's kind of climbing upside down and there's a real climber doing that of course it's not Sylvester fucking Stallone but but someone is

someone's climbing that and that type of routes pretty common like we're talking where it comes out like that yeah it's in and there's a part where you have to leap and grab and it's just when I whenever I see that stuff it's I like that movie a lot I thought Stallone did a great job me it looks like he's got the physique to do that stuff you see is like giant arms like Straining to the max every time he's doing something He's a little I think it's a misconception like Alex and all like you're talking about that like he's not a huge guy Cuz you don't want it you want a really strong strength to weight ratio

You don't want unless you've got a hang by one hand and bicep curl a woman Personally done that yet. So maybe that's the next level when I get up there. Then I could probably comment too. But I think for now I'm going to have to take your word at that. Yeah, yeah. Let's do some more MA questions. Oh, by the way, people are hitting me with like male Monday questions on my Reddit.

Like too many to answer at this point. You've got to be a Patreon. God, I hate to say that. If you really want an answer, do the Patreon. That's okay. I said it. You've got to be a Patreon. Then you get your question answered. A while back, you guys made a... Oh, that's the Death Pool question. I see that. But anyway, yeah.

I can't guarantee responses anymore. I'm getting too many questions. But if you do Patreon, then I feel kind of obligated. Should I sign up for that? Patreon.com slash PKA. Of course you should do it. Hey, what's

the worst name someone can give to their child? My first reaction is Adolf. That is pretty bad. I've seen the graph before of the popularity of names uh worldwide and then you know the years and and right when you get to like 1942 or so like adolf fucking

drops out of the sky it's like nobody wanted to be adolf after that like there are none like have you ever ever ever met an adolf not Not in my lifetime, no. No, that would seem to be a real awful person to meet an Adolf. I'm sure there's some white supremacist somewhere like, Little Adolf, he's going to be a leader, I'll tell you what. But you never see that. You never see it. I've never met an Adolf. I've met some fucked up names.

I knew a girl named Candy. And that seems like you're setting them up for a certain career. It's Candace, though. Was her name Candace? Her name was actually Candy. I knew a girl named Star. And as a parent, I hear Star. I think it's so beautiful, so nice.

It's the center of their world. It's like, yeah, I can see Star. But as a dude, because I was like 19 at the time, everyone was like, yeah, my porn star. She was hot, and she was ready to go. And Star was just a terrible name for that poor girl. What about Seven? I knew a guy named Lamangelo.

Great name. Yeah. I stole my name. I knew a guy named great name yeah i stole my name i knew a guy named lemongelo and it was spelled like this and i think you can see it's spelled lemon jello i had to believe someone named their kid lemon jello and pronounced it lemongelo um it's not as bad as his cousin's name, though. Oh, this is like some old internet joke. LaMongelo and Arongelo.

Wouldn't you hate that? There were guys at my house. There were Santavious and Montavious and Octavious. Those three cousins existed. My mom had a friend. Her last name was Minor and her first name was B. So she was B minor that's that's weak what about i uh i feel like you can't do that to your kids like who's doing that with

these fucked up ridiculous names that celebrities sometimes it's just like me yeah uh not that i know of i mean from, from the stuff we've been saying today, I could see you naming your kid something like this. Some, like, jackass name like this, where it's just, like, the whole thing is you get a laugh, like, once, and they get to live with it for the rest of their life. I mean, I'm just saying. Like, a cool name, though. Like, his name would be, like, Bud.

Like, or something like that. Buddy or something ridiculous. But I wouldn't name a kid, like, something ridiculously silly. Where'd this giant spider web come from scott follow me so the snake came back today by the way there's a four-and-a-half foot long snake right outside the door that's to my left over here so that's a case come back again the other night it was on the

so i uh... after this make the other night and uh... brought it in and uh to show it off on the show in a box. And then the next night, it was back on my porch again, and it fell off and fell on my friend's head. And she thought it had bitten her in the ear. And she comes running in. She's this little British lady, and she's, ah, the snake! The snake bit me in the ear! My ear!

Look in my ear! And she's like showing me her ear, and I'm just like, the snake did not bite you in the the ear! Look in my ear! She's like showing me her ear and I'm just like the snake did not bite you in the fucking ear! And my girlfriend goes out there like a hard ass, pins the snake's head down with a wrench, grabs it like the fucking crocodile hunter. It wraps itself around and around her forearm

and she comes walking in the house with a four and a half foot long snake on her arm. She's like, got it! You need to blur out her head and show a picture of your girlfriend holding that raccoon oh god yeah that it wasn't a raccoon it was a possum that she had gutted yeah my mistake yeah yeah she like caught and gutted a possum and yeah no she just thought it was funny she thought it was like it's more of a comedy thing uh it's crazy it's just a little a little. I often like to skin small mammals for comedy.

This is what I'm saying about the naming thing. This seems like just one little tiny step in that direction. We're talking about killing animals. What's the name here? Yeah, exactly. I see where you're going. I see where you're going. You got any more good AMA questions?

I'm looking for ones that don't drag back old stories like what's your worst injury you know shocks i don't think there's anything i haven't shared at this point um oh whatever happened to the survival trip that was to take place in the fall with joe joe had a fight come up yeah that got delayed because joe's fight and then I hell and then I was trying to get us to be able to go out on that wild uh game ranch in Texas and I never heard back about that so it's just kind of floating up in the air right now not only like when the trip will be but what it will be and you see once we get up past a certain point in the year that the way the trip goes down changes because at a certain point rabbit and squirrel are in season.

And those are two animals that are really easy to survive on. If you're in the wilderness and you can do some basic trapping and stuff like that. So my, my daughter has a friend, she stayed over last night and she did like this survival thing where they had to live off the land for nine days or something like that. And I was like,

yeah, we tried to do something similar. And Kyle went out and practiced, and squirrels were just dropping like flies. Like just, you know, pow, pow, pow, pow, pow. He's taking out squirrels like he's in a shooting gallery. And he says, Woody, if you can find water, I can keep us in a steady supply of squirrel meat.

And I'm like, sweet, we got this. We went out there, I couldn't find a fucking bug neither could kyle like there was nothing moving there was nothing to eat can you pick leaves off of trees and eat those things because there was no hint of food it was a bad scene so um i don't know maybe we'll have to go somewhere else but in where we were we couldn't find any squirrels. I couldn't bait a hook. I couldn't find a bug. But I'd do it again. Taylor, are you down for a survival trip? Is that something that appeals to you?

Oh, definitely. I'll do my best. God, seeing Kyle walk around in a shirt with his face on it is just so funny. And the fact that he still pretends like that wasn't a set-up shot where he's like, I was just sitting around and just happened to coyly look up in a random direction. Like, no, that was a staged shot.

Just admit it. I believe the way that it happened, but I also, if you spend enough time on camera, you know how to look your best, right? You know your best. Like for me, for example, I have a big nose, so I need to look straight on camera where that's gone. You know, chin forward, et cetera. I can be the most handsome version of me on call. Kyle sees a camera.

He knows it too. He knows he's need to be like 10 degrees off to the side, whatever. He has a pose. He hits it all the time. He saw the camera there, hit the pose, and goes, oh, it was so horrible. Ridiculously photogenic Kyle.

Yeah, right? Oh my goodness, you caught me looking like that. Oh dear. All right, looks like we got another mid-roll. But yeah, I would still love to do that thing. If you guys want to ask questions, though, patreon.com slash pka. There's all sorts of levels there.

Get the show early. Get a video version of PKN. Get AMA questions. There's a Google Hangout we do every month. You can hang out with us. Check it out. We'll do our thing. This is my squirrel gun.

If we ever actually go on the survival trip, I got an M&P 15. It's a squirrel that survived that? No, this is what I'm going to take whenever we go on our survival trip. It's an M&P 1522 with a suppressor on it. I can't tell. So there's no scope on it. Are you going to scope it or iron sight?

I'll put a scope on it. You need a suppressor so the other squirrels don't get wives. What happened to Ted? That'll put a scope on it. You need a suppressor so the other squirrels don't get wives. What happened to Ted? That's how it is, though. With subsonic ammo, this thing goes... Click. Yeah. I guess I know nothing about guns.

It didn't come from a gun background. I probably fired a gun once or twice, and it was a BB gun and a very small rifle. So that gun to me looks really big and I'm just wondering is that is it not so big? Because it feels like you're going to be shooting fucking squirrels. Squirrels are not that big. Do we need? Oh this is a much bigger gun?

What is this? For cats? Like if it's the last one with squirrels? It's a possum gun. This one's for vehicles. But that one's only like very slightly bigger than the last one so project I'm gonna drop the last one takes out a squirrel. Can you do you happen to have the rounds Kyle? Yeah, do you bet that might be what I'm missing might be what it actually fires 22 so you can just that's what you take out clinking or just shooting little rodents

The next one is what you use if there's an armored vehicle approaching your home and you're to be fair he does have both behind his couch so i mean like dude both contingencies he's prepared yeah i went to kyle's house i went to kyle's house and there's so much stuff like everywhere in his living room like we would just sit there and break break down AK 47s and AR 15s, like just while watching Trailer Park Boys or something like disassemble, reassemble, disassemble, reassemble. We're doing it. He has a 50 Cal on a bipod with like a 50 power scope just laying in front of the television in the living room pointed toward the front door. Like he would just quick. I don't know what, yeah. His first recourse was to go to Reddit

to deal with the landlord, seriously? Like just, what is the point of having this much weaponry? I could just see someone break down the front door and this scenario taking place. Wait. See, that, well, he's gonna ruin his whole front door. It's just gonna be, that whole side of the house just splinters. He goes for that at first.

This is hilarious. You know, I stream mostly, when I'm streaming I mostly stream US daytime, right? And I get mostly from that, I get European viewers. And this is the question I have a question. This is what they expect me to be like when they're asking me questions. I get gun questions occasionally, and I'm like, what? Like, how the fuck am I supposed to answer a gun question? You gotta ask one of these guys, I guess.

What's this, though? This is the small one. This is a.22 long rifle. This is what the first gun shoots. And this is a.50 BMG. It's a little rusty right now, but it's what the other gun shoots. So, it, very different. Can we have a button on camera for comparison size-wise as well? Because that would really kind of help

with that home. And just to clarify, Kyle, the larger one would also kill a squirrel? Can you go further away, Kyle? It's cut off on our... I want the perspective of how big is a squirrel relative to that larger round. I would. All right. So they have big squirrels in Georgia? Because, I mean. Compared to a can of soda.

Gotcha. That's probably the perspective I wanted. This is actually an explosive round. I paid $50 for this one bullet. This is a Ralphos round. That's $50. There's a little bit of high explosive in here it's like rattlesnake venom though just a little bit i'll get you that's awesome all my 50 bmg is tracer which is kind of fun i must have missed out on the boys club here like this is like

where's my get you involved like i got that room i keep disappearing into like trust me like we can hook you up we'll have you in full body armor and you just just name a gun and kyle will come back with he's not joking about the body armor thing i've got a one of my sponsors is a is a body armor company So I've got like full plate carriers with like it'll stop a 30 cal machine gun if I get shot with it And there's all kinds of cool little things laying around here. So is that the one that doesn't cycle right? Yeah, so once it doesn't fucking work right now. Yeah, and I got you can't just cycle it enough so that it starts working That's not a damn shame. It looks practical

And you can't just cycle it enough so that it starts working? That's not... It's a damn shame. It looks practical. That's a loaded magazine. It's an everyday carry gun. Is it good for this one, or...? What's that? I was laughing at the color scheme.

It feels like, you know, you have, like, a green one as well, and, like, a red one. It just really depends on what you're wearing, or... He paid for the DLC. Yeah, it's a micro transaction it's like a i think the pistol's already like closing in on two thousand dollars so like why not make it gold why everybody who's got one of these two thousand dollar pistols has a black one so like why do i have to be like them i don't want to conform to their black pistol bullshit um i like these things and the cool thing is like if i if i don't want to conform to their black pistol bullshit I like these things and the cool thing is like if I if I don't want to shoot 50 cal then I

can just like let's see here yeah that particular decision so when would you say to yourself I have this pistol I don't want to shoot 50 Cal I want to shoot what else what would I cheaper yeah something's cheaper so 50 cows around so I can just go ahead and put my other barrel on. And now I can shoot.44 Magnum. So it just goes back and forth that easy. That's kind of nifty. I don't know.

It's a loud, big fucking pistol. It's the biggest Desert Eagle they make. It's the.50 Action Express. If you've ever seen Snatch, it's the Desert Eagle.50. It's just kind of nifty to have the biggest one they make for video purposes and for big dick purposes, whatever

you want to call it. I was going to point that out to Filthy. I don't know if you know, but Kyle makes gun videos. It makes a little more sense now. Yeah, so these are in some... I want to call them props. They're real guns, but it makes a video more interesting when you have something that no one else has.

Yeah. You can probably write them off on your taxes too, right? I do. I'm just there for your streaming income. That makes sense. Yeah, they're totally... These are all business expenses. If it interests you, you should look into

shooting, Filthy. It's a really fun hobby. I don't have half as many guns as these two, but it's a lot of fun. It's great fun. That's what I'm doing. Yeah, that's what I'm doing. Shooting range stuff. It's going to be interesting. What state do you live in?

Is that private? I live in Illinois right now. Illinois. Never mind. Oh, that's not a good one. Yeah. Have you had... Maybe some airsoft.

Gun owners consider that a slave state. You're not free over there. Oh, look at this. A Patreon question. I've been thinking about purchasing a gun for a while now. Since you guys have so much experience with guns, what gun would you recommend for someone to start with who has little to no gun experience?

A.22 lever action. One of those things like Woody has. That's a good pick. A.22 lever action so that you don't want a semi-auto. You want something that's going to be easy. It's reliable, cheap to shoot. You can shoot varmints with it. You can target shoot

with it. You can plink cans with it. What you don't want to do is go buy a fucking Glock 9mm or something. All you can do is take it to the range and pow, pow, pow, but you're never going to be going out and actually having fun with anybody with a plink and can. Shooting 9mm like that's a little expensive. You could get a shotgun, but if you think you're going to shoot sporting clays,

shotguns are great. They're also excellent for self-defense, and they're good for hunting. So it's kind of threefold, the three main things I like to do with a gun self-defense hunting and like target shooting and stuff like that a shotgun can do all three so can the 22 um so either one of those a pump act like a remington 870 or remington 1100 if you're going to be doing light uh duty for a light duty cheap semi-auto or something like a leader act lever action uh 22 long rifle one of those i am i'm not kyle i almost feel like when kyle's here it's like you almost don't want to take this question but um the first thing is what are you using it for and where can you shoot it uh if if you happen to have a lot of land and

you can do anything you want then i really like kyle's lever action 22 it's cheap to shoot and it's just fun yeah when i feel like a cowboy like it's just fun. Yeah. When I feel like a cowboy, when I first started shooting, I thought like the big boom was the, like a fun appealing part of it. I wanted a gun that like, I don't know, could hypothetically take down big game or something. I felt like it was more manly and more interesting than a small gun.

But after, you know, I don't know what I'm in a decade and out of my shooting something like that I typically reach for the 22 it's not abusive on my ears it's fun it's more about like my own skill level than just watching some machine do an interesting thing and a 22 lever action my I have a Henry Golden boy and I just seem to hit what I point at with that thing all the time I guess the sights are built for me you know like they just kind to hit what I point at with that thing all the time. I guess the sights are built for me.

They just kind of fit the way that I like to use them and that would be a great first gun. But a shotgun is super fun too. One thing that's cool about the shotgun is there's so many different rounds. You can have dragon's breath that shoot fireworks out the front. Kyle has these anti-protester things that he shoots his friends with out of a shotgun. Which is ridiculous. They're like, hey, you wanna get hit with a ping pong ball?

And you're like, I don't know, I'm a little scared. It's still a real shotgun. He shoots nets out of it. Kyle's shot, he'll take apart a shotgun shell and shoot an arrow out of it. Shotguns are interesting because you can do a lot with them, but usually they're kind of worthless at the range. So if you live in a city or something

and your only shooting is going to be indoors in a range, then a shotgun's not really the thing. If it's for self-defense, I love a shotgun because one, with the long barrel, it's not the spread, it's the long barrel that makes it really hard to miss. It's really obvious what you're aiming at. And two, I have this notion that it'd be kind of hard to rip out of your hands compared to like a pistol or something like that. Shotgun is typically referred to as the best self-defense thing. So that's where, to me,

it depends on where you're going to shoot it. The lever action 22, if you have access to almost anything is a great choice. If you want a pistol, Kyle said no, but I like a full-size 9mm. Full-size means it kicks less because it's heavier and it resists the recoil. I like my P226, my SIG. That's a full-size 9mm. It doesn't kick hardly at all. It's a lot of fun. I mean, you can't carry it because it's huge.

Right. But it's a lot of fun. I have a Smith & Wesson M&P 9, uh i think his is more expensive but it's in the same class you know of like what you could expect in terms of handling it and uh yeah i thought it was a really good first pistol uh kyle keep a weapon for self-defense instead of curiosity i mean if you don't have them piled in front of them behind the couch like in general where do you keep them right on my bed stand i keep mine in a safe near my bedroom I have a special needs son and safe is the only answer that I trust and I keep my shotgun in

the corner there but I don't leave that loaded so the self-defense aspect on that then is you know not immediate it's like you have a minute or two minutes to go to your safe and grab the gun yeah it's like you hear something go bump in the night you want to see what's up. You know, if a window breaks, if, uh,

if maybe hear a voice, which has never happened, but that would be like a scenario. Uh, if somebody would have like break in my house and immediately make a beeline for the bedroom, I'd probably be caught empty handed. But,

uh, you know, I'm kind of playing the odds on that one. I, I, I have, some people have kids and they're like i just taught them gun safety and they know better and they actually do like i've met children who

are just really responsible around guns but um i don't think i have that particular superpower with my son you know i told him i'm not criticizing him i'm asking because i have no knowledge whatsoever i get that i didn't think you were but um uh. But I told him not to do something on a Minecraft event two days ago, and he didn't listen to me. Why would I roll the dice on gun safety? So, you know. I had a quick gun thing I wanted to add in there. I used to recommend the LCP for personal carry.

I'm changing it to the TCP. If you want a small compact Semiato, I think it's the TCP now from Taurus. Oh, by Taurus. It's fatter. Let me unload it.

Taurus is sometimes a brand that people don't think highly of, so it's interesting that Kyle likes it so much. I feel like it's easier. It's got more aggressive knurling back here to uh grab hold and uh you know fix a jam or a misfire i feel like it's beefier back here uh i can really get my palm on this when you put the mag in is that a nine millimeter uh i think it's a 380 i'll be right back i I want to get my LCP. Yeah. The LCP is also... Oh, are we all getting guns?

He's getting a gun and he's getting a drink. So why is it pink? It's my girlfriend's gun. It's what she carries. And she has not been putting my good bullets in there. I gave her some of those shredder RIP ammo that breaks off into a thousand copper razor blade bullets when you shoot someone. But

she didn't put it in here. Is she using like the brass range ammo? Full metal jacket, yeah. Which, I mean, fuck, you shoot somebody. Don't you not want that in your home? Full metal jacket, or is that like a gun myth? Preferably, if I'm

going to be in one room and you're going to be shooting bad guys in the neighboring room, I'd like it if you didn't have full metal jacket ammo. But, I mean, you know, I feel like the likelihood of my girlfriend shooting in my house is like zero unless she needs to be, in which point, I don't know. I guess I don't care. Any bullet hit, any bullet's a bad bullet. Really?

And if you want something you're if you want something bigger though as a guy I recommend this is a carry piece this is a Rossi 357 Magnum not a pit a pussy ass 38 like this is this is the this is a legit cartridge 357 Magnum but it's still small and compact and this thing weighs a couple of pounds you could beat someone to death with this if you needed To I mean it's I can't stress how much more hefty this is than this like this weighs Three times what this does it's a real brick in your hands which which helps a lot with the recoil And I don't know it's just an overall nice gun. He's got a lot of heft so kyle what makes you like the tcp

over the lcp they're very similar guns i bet if you held them side by side they'd have about the same footprint yeah i could grab mine i would say the tcp has a slightly larger um silhouette um and that's what's good about it there's more uh there's more to grab here the distance between this part of the gun and this part of the gun the width of the grip Is beefier? the fatness of it is also beefier and I just feel like it overall it gives me a better Firmer grip on the gun. It's more stable this gun

But just so everyone knows it's very very unloaded yeah I did the same thing if you don't know it's gone at myself but I'm gonna let you look through the sites ah yeah by comparison I sorry uh guys it doesn't have the um i'm putting this gun right at me right but uh two cameras he's actually i have two cameras so what filthy sees is not the same like here you guys would see it like that but uh yeah these the idea with this gun is that you carry it a lot and shoot it a little. That's the idea. It's not a great shooter's gun. Like Kyle pointed out, sometimes it... Just so you guys know, it's crazy empty.

It's super empty. I emptied it. Like, when you put your fingers on it, it's kind of... When the clip is there, it's a little bigger, because it gives you that spot, but you really just have two fingers here and then one finger on the trigger which I'm putting there.

My girlfriend just wandered by and she has no idea what this is about. She just knows that I'm doing a podcast with some guys and you guys are both waving around pistols on stream. She just looked at me like, looks at me oddly, shakes her head and just walks away. You supported this job. It's time for us all to go,

What power? So it's super thin. It's really, really light. And it's really thin. And it's really small. And the smallness, like I find a lot of people, I was talking to Taylor.

He was talking about a carry gun. And I was like, what's super common is someone gets like a full size nine. Like I did my M&P nine. And then they think they're going to carry it, and they maybe even do once or twice. And then it ends up in the nightstand. And he's like, it's funny. That's exactly what happened to both his thought process and his actions.

And if your goal is to carry a gun, then I think you should get a small one, right? First rule of gunfighting, bring a gun. How many rules are there? Just one. So there's Taylor. But I bet if you caught Taylor on a random afternoon, it wouldn't be on his hip, right? No, this is way too big to be carrying on your hip.

So I prioritized keeping it so small. Now the thing is, Kyle has more gun experience than me and he said like Woody I wonder if you got one that was just a little bigger if you'd still have your same opinion on how small small small Now keep in mind I will say the gun that's in my truck right now are in my car right now on my Camaro in the little glove box It fits the glove box perfectly just like it fits your pocket perfectly is the Ruger LCP you got there I carry one of those a lot and and you're right it fits in a jeans pocket just right alongside a cell phone or anything like that it's a very similar uh thickness and reach for your

phone and suddenly if you're curious even this is you know the little mini watch pocket on your jeans i even carried it in there with just the barrel stuffed in there and I'm just like open carrying it so everybody can see it. This is called a pocket holster, and it's designed to not come out of your pocket very easily. So if you can imagine this thing stuck in there, and then when you go to grab it, this part here, its purpose is to get stuck in your pocket

so the gun kind of pulls out. And I like holsters a lot because, I've told this story before, but go on. So all of you have, there's a permit for carrying in public generally, right? Is this the concealed permit type stuff? Concealed carry permit, yeah. And that's what you guys have for these?

Sure, yep, yep. I have that. We've talked about it, in different states, like Kyle's in Georgia, you literally just mail a form. Well, yeah, you're right. The process is, it's not a may permit. It's a shall permit.

If you think about that for a moment, they shall permit you a concealed carry permit in Georgia. It's not that they may permit you one. And what that means is everybody gets one, motherfucker. There's no sheriff who's going to be like, no, Jimmy Ray don't need one. No, Jimmy Ray gets his because he's not a felon. All you need is you go get yourself fingerprinted

at the local sheriff's department or whatever, pay maybe 50 bucks, and two weeks later. You're fucking packing heat and I live in a May permit and That means that before you can go to the Sheriff's Office and get your fingerprint Do your thing we have to pass both the shooting proficiency and a written proficiency test to get our permits Really that's only the difference between North Carolina versus Georgia? Yep. I wouldn't have expected that at all. I would have expected they would have similar gun laws

than Jersey. Right, like they're both southern states that are just pro-gun. Pro-gun. Yeah, right, but no, in North Carolina, you have to, it was a one day thing. The first couple hours were shooting proficiency. And basically they gave you different targets to shoot at.

And the thing for me was the time. Like I had never shot under time constraints before. And, you know, it added a level of stress. They even ran like police lights and stuff like that. So you're like, oh, fuck it. It is a whole nother experience. And I was surprised how much it mattered. I thought that I would be unshakable.

But, you know, you put a clock on me and i'm not as good a shooter so you know that's i think that goes for most people though it's i bet it does but i i i underestimated how much it would not that i like couldn't pass the test or anything i did fine but it was like oh suddenly i can and and there have been other times too where i like i've shot under either not competitively, I'm overestimating it, but shot against other people and stuff like that. And it makes me a worse shot. And I take that and I'm like, oh, you multiply that times 100 and now you have a stress situation. Don't go thinking that you're going to be easier. When I hear a policeman miss like 75% of their shots, I don't like it, but I get it because. Oh, yeah. Like, I don't like it, but I get it because.

Oh yeah. Like, like I totally understand it. It's when you're under pressure, you're not as good of a shot when, when I can, the faster my heart's going, the worse I am, unless it's like some sort of like quick action, instinctive shooting. Like if it's shotgun shooting, it doesn't matter. But if it's pistol shooting, I get rattled. Even shotgun shooting. Like if you had to like jump out from behind a barrier, like, all right, you know pop and shoot that that would be perhaps an action you haven't trained Maybe you have that's not the you're not normal The shotgun in particular. I'm really fucking good at like like Like I've shot from moving vehicles I've shot and I'm just I'm good at like

calculating both things at once, both me moving one way and the target moving another and then knowing the speed of the shotgun shell and the speed of the target and calculating all that on the fly as long as I don't think about it too hard I'm good at just instinctively snapping on and doing that stuff

that's why I think I'm fairly good at paintball I feel like it's a similar kind of shooting with the leading of the targets and sometimes you're moving and the target's moving at the same time. That's what we did constantly when I was a kid. I got a new knife. Do you want to see it?

Another one. We talked about it for a while. You guys get a new knife every week. Every day. This one's tiny. So what happened was I had this knife and i liked it a lot it was a kershaw jive i think um i like that it's small and i like that it kind of clicks open like that and i used it for everything mostly opening boxes but uh also like i just find myself with the screw that needs to be tightened and you know something that needs to be levered or whatever.

It's not an expensive knife, which I like. It was maybe $25 or $35, something like that. So, and I like inexpensive knives because I can treat them poorly. But it was still just a knife. So, I switched to a multi-tool. And it is super small. It's smaller than I expected it to be when I bought it. I was warned while it was in the mail, like, Woody, that thing's smaller than I expected it to be when I bought it. I was warned while it was in the mail.

Like, Woody, that thing's smaller than you might guess. But it comes with pliers, which are kind of cool. I use these more than you might guess. It comes with, I'll go through this really quickly, a little knife, which appears to be adequate for opening boxes and stuff. Like, none of this is meant to be self-defense. It has a nail file with a screwdriver end. It has scissors, which I haven't used yet,

but I can't imagine. For comedy's sake, it ought to have like three different sizes of knives. You're like box, like home invader, squirrel, you know, like box,

home invader, really difficult box. Right, exactly. i can't imagine these being useful for much more than like a loose thread on your clothing but that that's i guess what they're for and then it has i'm trying to get to the one of the interesting ones this is a screwdriver bottle opener and this is the one i'm waiting on this i i like if i didn't know any better i thought it was just like a pokey. Toe knife. Frank has one of those. It's a two-dimensional Phillips head. So, you know, you can only fit narrow things in a

small package like this. So this is a Phillips head, but it just grabs half of the four instead of all of them. And I like this because it means I'm not using the wrong tool all the time. Oh, and you can get it engraved. So mine says Woody's Gamer Tech, which I think is pretty cool look at that knife i linked you to it's a spider comb uh bug it's a it's just a tiny tiny little clip knife that i thought would be cool yeah what do you think about that twelve dollars spider co is a is a is a nice knife company. I don't have any connection to them. However, I am interested in this. And I also want to give that guy modeling it some lotion.

Look at his fucking hands. Like hover over it. Hover over the picture on the left and it'll magnify it. Jesus. We need to get a palm reader on this motherfucker. He doesn't have much time left. He's in my fucking death list. There's something wrong with him.

Like, what the fuck? He's a cocoa butter dude. You're a hand model. Like, what is he thinking? He's a hand model and that's what his hand looks like? No, they looked at this and go, this knife is a little too small. It might not appeal to our real, more machismo-oriented guys.

We need to show some guys have a tough fucking life as a hand model. He just chose it. They're like, we need rugged hands to go with this little baby knife. Yeah, he goes from his hand modeling to his job at the mines. Straight from there. What if they had gotten an infant to be the hand model and totally threw off your scale? I could see a baby. Yeah, if you're going to get your baby a knife,

that's the knife for them. All right, it's time for a sponsor. I recommend every baby have a knife. Yeah, sponsor Reed. Woo-woo! This is what we've been waiting for. So this episode of Painkiller Already is also being brought to you by the Auto Blow 2,

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You'll like it. There's a lot of tawdry humor in it. It's not just the folded ham. There's pictures of vaginas. There's, like, astronomical pictures of vaginas it's not just the folded ham there's pictures of vaginas there's like astronomical models of vaginas uh it seemed risky and this is fucking america we can talk about guns but we can't talk about pussies that's right so he said once you've seen the video once you've seen the video you'll know all about the contest and then you can head on over to vagina contest.com that's right vagina contest.com and you can know all about the contest, and then you can head on over to VaginaContest.com. That's right, VaginaContest.com,

and you can check out all the details and try entering yourself to win some cool cash prizes. Now, could we talk about the product itself and how it works, what it does, and my personal review? Now, see, I believe you put your dick in it. Am I correct? Absolutely. Step one. view i think that's where we i believe you put your dick in it am i correct absolutely

so so step one yeah i guess step one is lube so i'll start from the beginning um so this thing showed up in plain brown paper um like like cardboard uh wrap uh box you know like it was it was very it wasn't like here's your blowjob machine, Mr. Davis or anything like that. So that I liked. When I opened it up, I didn't know what I was opening despite like, even the company it said it was from. So it's discrete packaging, I believe they refer to that as. It's a little heavy. Like this is not like some little like, what do they call that other thing that you like manually do? A flashlight. Is this to help with recoil? Yeah, you need that. So it's pretty hefty.

This is a real device. You're gonna have to put this away in a drawer or something. It does take up a bit of space, I will say that. It plugs in. And that's a... Some of you may think that's a drawback. No. The best sex toys plug in. They don't run on fucking sex toys. You're not using this on the go.

No, you don't know. Absolutely not. It's a power thing weird isn't it I mean like what are you gonna get all these two little batteries is there is there a cigarette lighter adapter so I could drive it in what did you say does it what dim the lights when it goes all right play some music so I think about the power drain but yeah oh I, I follow, I follow. So what's actually going on with this thing, in case you're wondering, you've got this part, which is super gross, I'll admit. So you've got this part, and this is the part that your penis is actually going in.

Don't worry about your dick being too big for the auto blow. How far does it stretch? I'm still concerned. If anyone is out there... That's a nice sound effect. Let me get an extra one. Sounds like high-quality, American-made... That's a nice pussy right there. If any of you are wondering, like, oh, is it going to be able to handle my enormous dick?

Well, then, the answer is absolutely. Yes, it will totally handle your big dick. So, not going to be a problem there. Now, you're not just making love to a rubber vagina or anything like that, or a rubber throat I guess this would be. That's not the deal. The autoblow is doing all the work for you. And if I had to describe the inner workings, and I'm going to show you, but just so you

know what you're looking at. There are two rings that are sort of spring-loaded so that, you know, when you press against them, they squeeze, they hug onto your dick. And those rings are covered with these tiny little balls that roll around, kind of like an abacus. So those are kind of like rolling

across your dick, kind of like one of those massagers or something that has the balls that kind of rotate freely around. Oh, like an abacus? Stop, Kyle. That's what came to mind when I saw it. I'm going to show you. If you look on the inside, so you've got these are spring-loaded,

so you can see it stretches if you press against the side. It's the sexiest abacus I've ever seen. And there's two of them on either side, and when you turn this bad boy on the first thing you're gonna notice is it purrs like a kitten right like mmm It's got a nice loud Which maybe you most people wouldn't want in a sex toy, but I'm gonna say I like it I like everybody in the house knowing Kyle's fucking his yeah give me some space right now Kyle's getting blown by an electrical implement right now um so you've got that in

there and that's of course squeezing this and so what you do is of course you know you this goes in there really easily it's not a problem it's gonna jam the uh the fake pussy into the robot here yeah so it's in there now and you know it won't pull immediately out it's it's kind of got I'm just going to jam the fake pussy into the robot here. Yeah, so it's in there now, and it won't pull immediately out. It's kind of got like a seal there. And I'm kind of grossed out by the fact that it looks like a mouth, I'll be honest. I was saying before the show that it looks like the mouth of a Cabbage Patch Kid doll. It really does.

If you're familiar with that, we'll get what he pulled. Do you think That maybe is a specialty portion of this product for a specific audience. And they just, I think it's a very, uh, deliberate, deliberate choice. Very aesthetic. Well,

there's a reason they're popular. I think that's a big part of what the, uh, of the, uh, the contest they're having is that they're going to design other inserts for this. Uh,

and so they want people to design to show them what their perfect vagina would look like. And then they're going to make it for the auto blow. And so you'll be able to fuck that instead. I personally am enjoying the standard thing. I will say I have used it a couple times. I thought it was pretty cool. Very effective.

I guess I'll just leave it at that. It doesn't take a long time. I haven't spent a lot of time with the auto blow. You don't have to. You don't have to. You don't have to. You pour a little bit of wet platinum in here. What you're looking for is efficient. This is an efficient machine.

It's more efficient than any device or technique known to man, as far as I know. It really gets the job done. It's that secret abacus technology. Absolutely. That's Chinese technology used here in the auto blows. Secret Chinese blowjob machine abacus works, inner workings. Millennia of innovation have led to this. But, Kyle, what is the cleanup process like with one of these?

All right. So I'm glad. A lot of shame? You know, it's not as gross or nasty as you might think. So here's the problem. You'd dry it in the second sink with this hanging out with like the. Throw it in there with the silverware. Let's say this is a used auto blow.

Is it dishwasher safe? That's what I want to know. I feel like it would melt. And I will say this. This part feels like human flesh. A lot of sex toys are dishwasher safe right i mean i was just wondering about this one they are i doubt it though i will say this this part feels like flesh like it even it's kind of scary how much like like

flesh this feels so just know that going in but the process is this i guess you just turn the whole thing inside out and then you know wash it in the sink. That's what I did. And then sort of dry the thing off and then wash the lint off and let it air dry and then you've got... You're fresh to fuck it again. I wouldn't want sloppy seconds from an auto blow. That seems very

lazy and disgusting, although I'm sure that it will happen. I won't judge you in the way you use your autoblow because it's your autoblow. You can do whatever the fuck you want to it and you don't have to feel embarrassed or ashamed of it. I've got a couple questions about the product.

You can come on the Switch. You can wrap the cord around your balls. Whatever you want to do to the autoblow and no one will judge you. Did you not get one, Taylor? It's just Kyle? No, I haven't gotten mine yet. It hasn't arrived yet. That's hardly fair hardly fair i know right but uh just quick questions does it make you watch

bad movies afterward not afterward but during of course you know you get maybe get some porn pornography does it does it want a foot rub oh absolutely oh i see what you're saying yes no oh absolutely no no when you're done with the auto blow, you put it in a fucking drawer. How much does it talk? It's not a fucking word. It's made a little noise when I pull out. Do you have to bring it to dinner? Absolutely not. Although I do, because

nothing makes nachos better than an auto blow. Does it make that noise like when you remove it? No. It sort of makes a very a very slurpy sort of uh sounds like a llama spit you ever burp and it tastes a little bit like vomit it's that noise that's it's kind of like that it's real hot and acidic woody could you look up what a cabbage patch baby's mouth looks like you know i can could just show the audience and just compare

this is a team effort i like this very interesting vote in the contest find the most attractive vagina so it appears that there isn't a unique cabbage patch mouth i feel like the lips are just. Yeah, I know. Right. It's so close to touch. I swear to God,

it feels like human flesh. It's made from real women. Can you hold yours up, Kyle? Certainly. Yeah. I need to see the lips. Is this a screenshot?

Yeah, we're comparing a cabbage patch baby's mouth to the lips on uh on this thing i i definitely oh my god it reminds me this is perfect yeah yeah yeah that's there's definitely a similarity there kyle you're on to something so finally my boyhood fetishes will be will be solid i think i found exactly yep yep yep yep disgusting so if you want to fuck a cabbage patch kid or something oh my god or, you know, you're just... Don't think of this as something... We were talking about this earlier, how

if this were some kind of new rabbit dildo for the ladies, then they would all giggle about and be like, oh, yeah, that's great. And any guys who watched him talking about it would be like, yeah, that's hot. I'm going to get my girlfriend the new rabbit with the ass tickler. But just because we're guys, a sex toy with a battery in it that plugs into the wall or really does anything whatsoever other than using your hand is just like, guess you don't get any pussy.

No, I just want to fuck a robot every now and then. You don't want to fuck a robot? I was thinking about the noise, right? The noise provides a lot of possibilities. In my dreams, if you use this thing enough, then you can create a Pavlonian response. A Pavlonian response in your significant

other. They hear that noise and they associate it and they know that there's a hard cock behind that door and they should come running. Not for long, though. Eventually... The window of opportunity is pretty limited. 90 seconds to act. That's why it will become an urgent mating call

to your significant other. When she hears row row row row she's going to be like row. Yes. What about your ice maker in your refrigerator? This is not going to have

someone's fucking some rubber or they're making a mixed drink. What about your ice maker in your refrigerator? This is not going to have that strength. Someone's fucking some rubber or they're making a mixed drink. Now, I think it's a little bit loud. I will say that. So if you're going to have to masturbate, but I wouldn't say that it's completely out of the realm of possibility if you've got to be quiet most of the time because you could still use it like a

Fleshlight because it still does the same thing you just don't have the added fun of a robot doing all the work for you So you can still you pay the fucking motor yeah, you're gonna use that shit exactly Do your homework? But if you do have to go in silent- Long term, long drives. If you do have to do some silent running mode, uh, masturbation, then you can do that, just so you know. It's like having two masturbatory tools in one. It's both of them. It leaves your hands free for whatever else you want to do.

You know, if you choke somebody or yourself, or like maybe there's a- You can cradle your automatic machine gun while simultaneously getting off. You don't even have to leave the couch. You know that – what is it called? Auto-asphyxiation? There we go. Look at this.

Auto-erotic asphyxiation. Auto-erotic asphyxiation can finally be safe, right? You can choke yourself while giving yourself a blue drop. Oh, totally safe. No, no. It's good. It's good. And then as you go out, you'll just stop choking yourself as opposed to the whole belt method which you know we all struggle with right

Yeah, so at last This is the tool that we've all been dreaming of. Well, I'm impressed. I promise you, it's totally worth the investment. I think it's the best masturbation I've ever experienced. I think it's the most fun you can have without another person involved. If you're a guy, it was a lot of fun. I think it's kind of comical that it is what it is.

I have no shame about such things. So it's like the people in my house were like, oh yeah, that showed up and he disappeared. And I was like, yeah, I went and fucked it. Like, you're not going to embarrass me. I was like, okay. The video game shows up. You don't wait until everybody leaves to try it.

You just go to the bathroom. I'll just do it here in the living room. Like, I won't even have any shame about it. Just tell this What do you want my house get out if you don't like it hypothetical single woody would be the same way I'd be talking about first-person experiences more if I didn't have a daughter in high school who could be shamed by this thing Which is why I just laugh at Kyle's jokes I'm not sure they gave me a free one, but I believe they're a couple hundred dollars, right? Was that out of pity?

Yes, yes. I sent him my sort of a sexual resume listing some of my accomplishments or failures. We need to broaden this ASAP. Like, really? It's been that long? Yeah, let's get him. I'm gonna look here. Is there a coupon code or anything I don't believe so yeah

I think they just went so if the web price there's a web only price is a hundred and fifty nine dollars Oh cheaper than I thought I'm gonna be honest it's a complete bargain the last prostitute I bought was like $200 and and I would much rather well I mean that was a great story but I'd much rather trade that experience, the sexual part of it for an auto blow, much better and if you break it down to how much money it costs based on how much you're going to be using it per year

it's like a quarter a day it's like barely more than feeding a kid in Somalia, like just barely more than that and those kids never make it, I mean some warlords I mean if you're trying to master this right, like I have like 4,000 hours in Civ, I have no idea how many hours you kids never make it. I mean, some warlord's going to come after them. I mean, if you're trying to master this, right? I mean, I have like 4,000 hours in Civ.

I have no idea how many hours you have in that already. I mean, you're going for the mastery. There's a ticker on the back just like a tractor. That would be so depressing. I know, right?

What if you're an app? Like number of revolutions or something? Like join the Autoblow app. It'll keep track of how many hours you spend getting your tickets on the app. And you know how it will look? It's a digital display, but it's an abac app. It'll keep track of how many hours you spend. And you know how it looks?

It's a digital display, but it's an abacus. It just clicks. Kyle, I have a story, kind of. Somebody wrote me. Because you mentioned your prostitute story that you got out of. So hang in here. It's a paragraph long. Dear Woody, I'm a 19-year-old guy and a faithful PKA listener since episode 55.

My story begins on Tinder. I had been chatting with this cute Asian girl for a couple weeks and decided to meet up at a park. After a few hours of exploring the woods and talking, we decided that we should fool around in the back of her car. Everything was going great until she got on top of me and let out a concerned, uh-oh, definitely not what you want to hear. So there I am, naked, sweaty, in the back of an Audi. I looked down and saw a pool of blood forming. Uh-oh, indeed. The situation was only made worse by the complete absence of napkins,

paper towels, or any kind of absorbent material. We ended up cleaning up with my underwear, and I went commando. She was obviously very embarrassed. So immediately, I started telling her that it's not the worst thing that's happened to me to make her feel better. But to my dismay, she asked the story. Problem is, I didn't have a story. But FPS Megaduck did. I told her about the girl that stuffed her hand wallet with makeup pads.

I think you messed up the story. That knocked loose, causing an even larger tidal wave of blood. I kissed her forehead and tell her, don't worry, it's not the worst I've seen. We've been talking for a few months and the relationship is going great. Thank you, PPAA, for giving me the necessary skills to talk my way out of this. Ah, a relationship built on lies.

No, in my case, she had a diaphragm. And I think younger people might not, I don't think diaphragms are as popular as maybe they once was, but basically it's a female contraceptive device that prevents the semen from getting to her cervix. It's sort of a disc with an expansive ring thing, and it's plastic and rubber. How old are you? I'm 29 now, unfortunately. That happened in May.

I'm 42. How unfortunately. That happened in May. I'm 42. How old am I? 42. Yeah. 24. Okay. Just wanted to get kind of the range. Okay.

I'm 31. So... I'm just curious. Oh. So she had a diaphragm, and apparently she was on her period big time and still working as a prostitute. And I didn't purchase her per se, but she was bought for me, and I was asked if I preferred the blonde or brunette.

I think she was the blonde. And anyway, during intercourse, the diaphragm was knocked loose by, because she said my, for whatever reason, the diaphragm got knocked loose. Giant cock, just saying. Yeah, it was giant cock. She said my large penis was, she's like, I knew you were too big. And it just seems too self-serving to add at this point of the story but in any case there was blood everywhere like you butchered a pig and for whatever reason it didn't gross me out at all because it was just

like you know i'm already fucking so uh my thesis is on uh my thesis that i put is on a sexual arousal and sexual disgust. Okay, that's great. Yeah, so disgust comes in a couple of different flavors, and one of those flavors is sexual disgust, and this is generally in response to sexual stimuli, things like bodily fluids and the like. And it turns out, A, that men in general have less of a problem with that than women, and B, as your sexual arousal goes up,

your response towards sexual disgust but not the other types of disgust goes down so in other words when you're really turned on that type of shit doesn't bother you so much so go on sorry just to interfere totally and i agree with you 100 and i can definitely testify to that you're absolutely right although after after i come that it might be a different story yep so so yeah absolutely blood every fucking where and i thought it was hilarious i kept making blood brother jokes and like and like buying her i bought her a bloody mary later and uh and i was just really making fun of her uh the whole time i was like i'm all negative what about you and like i was i was like

look i'm not gonna be pissed about this i was like just make sure you take care of the sheets because it was you know it was a very nice hotel i and you know it's my credit cards on the room and those sheets looked like fucking norman bates had spent the night and had a little fun i mean they were there was enough blood on those sheets that you would think someone slit their wrists and died in my bed so she took care of the sheet she called she called them took care of that and uh and that was that but yeah it wasn't like makeup yeah makeup pads yeah i don't know yeah jesus christ like we're gonna lay stuff in her vag with that that's that's a little crazy it was a diaphragm and uh and i didn't know it and uh and yeah i thought that was really funny i'm glad that happened that's just such a silly story

and that story gets it gets worse and worse as it goes on speaking of which i'll get a little bit of jeremy news i'll throw out there real quick because Filthy doesn't know Jeremy or anything but Jeremy is getting married the day after tomorrow. It's a it's sort of a redneck country style wedding so like there's a lot of denim and cowboy hats and

I'm going to put my phone in my shirt pocket and film the whole thing and if it's funny enough we'll do a Patreon only video that will upload and show off Jeremy's thing and if it's funny enough we'll do a Patreon only video that we'll upload and show off Jeremy's wedding maybe if anybody's interested in that. If it's interesting, if like there's some legit funny shit that goes down at the wedding

like if there's like a hoedown or like someone shoots a shotgun in the air when they say I do something like that like you know We'll have to edit it down. Whereabouts in Georgia are you? Northeast Georgia near the South carolina line okay um so about an hour and a half outside of atlanta and about an hour southwest from greenville rural right there that area uh what's that rural rural yes yeah big time yeah yeah lots of not uh it's uh there totally yeah okay yeah

not even there it's almost a guarantee that's exciting especially with this particular guy yeah yeah this particular guy says uh he's a character. I have a story. Here's the link. But it has an update since I bookmarked it. So the story was that Homer and Marge are getting legally separated in Simpsons season 27. And it came from Al Jean, the executive producer on the show. But now I see the update. They're claiming that they're not breaking up. So I don't know what to make of that. Legally separated, breaking up, I'm not sure what happens there.

I mean, they'll probably separate for an episode or two. They've lasted longer than most real marriages. Yeah, right? Yeah, that's true. I hope that neither of them get any older. Yeah. How much longer can they drag that show out Jesus? I haven't watched it in so long Yeah, probably ten years at least I haven't watched it in a long time But I kind of root for him like I like The Simpsons. They seem good. I got nothing against them I'm just like done. I like South Park a lot. Do we even like Family Guy? We haven't done Game of Thrones talk I understand people like spoilers

Do you watch Game of Thrones, Filthy? I do. I almost put Martin on the fucking death list because I don't want him to die, right? Because if he dies, the fucking series ends. He said that he does not want his work. He doesn't want someone to write it like other writers do.

Sometimes they'll have their notes in a story. He wants his legacy for the Game of Thrones series to die with him if he dies. He told the director and everything for the show how it ends, and I'm not sure of the details, but that would suck if there was no ending in the literature. I'd be really bummed out. But I'm a big Game of Thrones fan, so we can do that.

Yeah, have you read the books? Yeah. You have? Aha, you're slightly ahead of me. I'm listening to the audiobooks. So our goal going forward with this broadcast should be not to do any book spoilers or show spoilers that go past episode 9 of season 5. Agreed? What was episode 9?

This is Thursday. What was Sunday's episode? 9. That was episode 9. Yeah, so the 10th one is – How can we go past that? By reading the book. You're a book reader. Do you know what's going to happen next show?

Well, I mean, they're diverging, right? The book is no longer in sync with the movie. They're diverging more and more every episode. This is not a spoiler of anything past the last aired episode. Didn't you know Danny was going to fly off on a dragon? Yeah, I knew that so

like i also have a pretty good idea what the big thing in the next episode is but the stuff with stanford rathian's daughter that is not in the books yet apparently it's supposed to be coming yes that's right yeah i agree so um uh but yeah the last show was pretty significant see i started out that episode where my girlfriend and I were talking about it, and she's like, I just don't like Stannis. And I'm like, well, you know, Stannis is a pretty, just talking about the show, not from the book knowledge. I'm like, well, he's a neutral guy, and he's pretty good.

He follows the laws for the most part. He's just trying to make ends meet and follow his own path as he follow his own path as he sees fit and not like four minutes later on screen he's like that was your take home was that he's like he's a he's a pretty reasonable guy he's a fucking fanatic right he has a goal and he's going to give anything for that goal that's dangerous man i don't know what you're talking about. Really? I'm kind of with Mirka. I feel like Stannis is the law-abiding... His big problem is that he's not charismatic.

He refuses to do anything. He's not charismatic. He's inflexible. Yeah, he starts out as lawful neutral, I guess, and then eventually he just kind of convinces himself that his word is law, and as long as he can rationalize it in his head, he still thinks he's abiding by the law in a way. He's like working from the ends justify the means, right?

Yes. And he thinks he's going to be sacrificed along the way for this. He's the rightful leader. Regardless of whether it is his daughter, it doesn't matter exactly. I don't feel like it was anything until he got to the part where they start killing – when they kill the daughter. I think that – because before, he was always trying to temper it. He was always like, no, he was going to kill that bastard.

Like birthing the shadow that killed the other rival. Killed his own brother with a ghost demon. His brother was not supposed to get the throne. He had an illegitimate claim. He was his younger brother. But people liked his younger brother so

he's like I guess I'll take a stab at this you know winning the game of thrones and he's like no you're the younger brother demonology or something like he's willing to like dabble like be like all right so what isn't he willing to do he's convinced that this is this is right he's right to be in this position what

isn't he willing to do that and all that we've been shown so far is that nothing is out of bounds for him and what he's willing to do. But it took him a while. It took him a while to get there. I hate that they burned the daughter. This is not a spoiler of any way. But in the books, we don't know what happens. One would assume the daughter is going to die in the books too.

Where I am, she's still alive. If it wasn't that, if it was something else like all right we'll give her a quick death because in this situation we're in going back this death going forward is death we have no choice but to invoke some magic because we're so fucked um in a situation to be fair he's not it's not exactly they hadn't like that situation hasn't just arisen to them like everyone was like warning him oh you can't really march that way you don't have any food you're marching into the winter in the north with no fucking food or supplies he's like yeah we're doing it this is the time right right because if he didn't march

the time if he stays if he stays at castle black like that winter is going to last 15 or 20 years or something outrageous like without some sort of a divine like magical dragon magic intervention or like slaying the white White Walker King or something. Like, winter is coming, and it's not going to be like, oh, we'll wait till the winter's over and then we'll wrap this up. It's like now or never. There wasn't enough food in the wall either. Like, he had to go.

He had to go somewhere, and they're all like, well, that's a dangerous place to go, but no one's providing. You know, it's like picking a restaurant. Do you want to go here? No. Do you want to go there? No. Where do you want to go? Oh, I want to go there no where do you want to go oh i don't know but all these ideas suck well fucking you got to be for

something you have to be for something and no one's for anything so he's like well yeah let's march towards this thing comes around and kills your daughter so you can go to applebee's another shitty option no no she's the only character with fucking plan. She's like, oh you want this? So she had does she have real magic or is this all bullshit like the book? I believe it's real magic I think that wait, you say everything we shouldn't the jokes I Feel like everything we've been shown thus far suggests that her magic is a hundred percent legit Especially considering that the Lord of Light also kept resurrecting The leader of the Brotherhood or whatever. I can't recall recall his name but the guy who's been there but yeah the one

missing an eye and he's got a band of brothers or something like that yeah yeah yeah it's there's just too many um things that would lead us to believe that this is legit magic like she's killed two or three people with magic like two of them that we can definitely say she did she killed rinley definitely with magic and she definitely killed the i think it was the castellan of the castle that was holding um uh king robert's bastards or at least one of them and he wanted the bastard they wouldn't give him up and then that night the guy like falls off a tower or something they surrender the castle even that was not as definite the only definite definite one i have is the shadow thing, right? She births a shadow and does whatever.

And then she says, oh, you need that guy dead too? Fine. And then he falls off a wall. But standing on walls is dangerous. Don't forget now that the books were different than the show there. In the book, we see her birth the demon specifically for the Castellan that I mentioned, not

for Stannis. We don't see the birthing of the demon to kill Stannis. We only see the birthing of the demon specifically for the Castellan that I mentioned, not for Stannis. We don't see the birthing of the demon to kill Stannis. We only see the birthing of the demon with Davos taking her into the human family. That's a really fucking cool way to bring a demon into the world. If you want like a magic, I've read a lot of sci-fi, a lot of fantasy. I like to think like we've seen

some pretty great fucking authors address that. That's a really cool way to bring a demon into the world. Like the physical, yeah. It's pretty like there's there's definitely a cost associated with that it doesn't come off as light yeah yeah i like that magic costs something in this there's but she takes credit for the red wedding and you're like i don't know tywin seems to have a pretty good claim to the red wedding too um she takes credit for i'm trying to think of the other ones i don't remember them all but joffrey uh she takes credit for jo'm trying to think of the other ones i don't remember them all but joffrey uh she takes credit for joffrey and it's like the leeches in the flame but for joffrey

baylon grayjoy and rob start she took credit for all three of those she she named all three and within like six episodes they all died um but but you know unless you're birthing a demon i need a better tie to it you know there were a lot of people who wanted to kill Joffrey. Wow, three kings died in a war? Like, it's not that. I'm just saying. But then again, she definitely did some, right? She definitely birthed the demon.

And she's definitely bringing back that guy from the dead. She drank that poison. Remember when Maester, when that Maester was trying to poison her, the crippled Maester who used to be who was Stannis' Maester. He fucking poured this awful poison into the glass of wine, handed it to her. She drinks all but

like a sip, then gives it to him. He drinks the last sip and falls over fucking dead with blood coming out of his nose and she just kind of simpers at him like, huh, well food. What do you guys think? Lord of light force of good force of evil you think this is really what she's portraying it as it's being set up pretty of course not a force of evil in the end evil good things don't make you birth black demon ghosts to go assassinate things like it's she's so racist if it had been a white demon ghost would you be okay with it

yeah i feel like good magic should be should should be fairer and by fair i mean you know prettier it should be like now black people are ugly jesus kyle that's not even so yeah i think it's a i think it's evil magic and i think it's real it's some sort of a demon god that that's what the lord of light is um you don't see the children of the forest ordering anybody to burn any uh anybody or any idols or anything like that i feel like yeah i feel like when you have to pay for blood with blood then you're starting to deal with some bad guy stuff but this is maybe but this is martin fucking everyone dies in his series right everything is blood for blood why would magic be any different?

I mean, there's nothing that's gained in this except that half everyone dies for it. Yeah, that's true. I'm looking forward to the next episode. Yeah, I want to finish the book. I only have an hour and a half left in the last audiobook. If people don't know, it's like 150, 250, 200 hours, something like that.

So I'm about 99% through the books. I'm pretty close. I'm going to pick up book four again. I'm about eight hours into book four. I'm going to pick it up again after this season concludes. I prefer to do it that way. I was way ahead of Woody, and then I completely stopped after the season kind of started,

especially when we got the first six episodes early through some nefarious means. Or maybe five episodes. But we got – remember, was it four? It was a big chunk. Three or four. I forget what it was. Depending on which enforcing agency is viewing you, you should keep going down.

Three. Like the sentence is per episode. Never happened. I never saw any of them episodes. Not the first four. No, sir. Watch the first four. No sir. Watch the first four like the first day and I feel like that made

in my opinion this has been the weakest season thus far. I think seeing the first four out of the gate like that is part of it. I also think the Sand Snakes bullshit Jamie being in Dorne bullshit is part of that because I feel like all of that is wasted air time. There's a couple of interesting characters there but since Bronn isn't even supposed to be in existence anymore i don't think

i think i don't think he's mentioned again in the books i think once he like abandons tyrian at the fight with uh oberon like you don't see his character anymore he's bought off and sold and gone but so so they can't even write for him well like he's not even doing anything interesting or cool anymore game of thrones gotten less sexy too because he did like i yes there used to be tons of titties and ass and and and every all the time calise doesn't want to show her tits anymore uh and and and they they even stopped like making the like the less famous uh chicks get naked i look this show was dude i gotta think who it is fucking fucking Tyrell. Gorgeous. But dude, there was a brothel scene last week.

There was a scene where they went to a whorehouse. And I don't recall any nudity in the whorehouse. Season one Game of Thrones, you'd be looking at all the varieties of pubes. Don't show up naked. That's how you judge the whores. When he's like too old. In past episodes, when you go to Little Fingers establishment, you're buying whores,

they're naked. They're naked right there. And they're not shooting them from the neck up either. It's full frontal nudity and then they do a panning close-up of their ass cheeks. Yeah, yeah. I want to see titties bouncing and asses

gyrating. What is your problem, Dan and Dan or whatever their names are? I want to see titties bouncing and asses gyrating. Let's ask a full-time question. What is your problem, Dan and Dan or whatever their names are? Going the wrong way. Yeah, I don't understand. This is what Stern complains about when he talks about the show as well. He's like, the Khaleesi used to get naked. Everybody used to get naked.

There used to be tons of gratuitous nudity, and they've cut it all down. You don't want to get naked anymore, Khaleesi? Bring in the body doubles. Maybe play devil's advocate here a little bit. The whole season has been a buildup. It's been a really slow buildup. Maybe they're saving all the nudity for the last couple episodes. We don't know.

There's only one more episode. The finale may just be total nudity the entire time. All the characters are naked throughout the movie. That's right. Filthy, I liked you until you started defending the lack of nudity in Game of Thrones. I don't like nudity. Did you not hear the devil's advocate right at the beginning of that? Yeah, they just need more time for the plot.

Like, there's so much shit going on. They're like, oh, we had 45 seconds allotted to tits here, but, God, we should really catch up with what Tyrion's doing. We haven't had an extended version yet, do we? When it comes out on DVD, I bet the extended version is 20 minutes of nudity cut from each fucking episode i hope so yeah like denarius in the books this isn't giving anything away is really sexual like there's a lot of sexy stuff that she's doing yeah she has that

lesbian scene like where's that at where's the underage lesbian finger fuck fest i want that like nothing like a nine year old slave girl finger banging a 13 year old queen on a boat right I don't think that she was nine but yeah I think it's the light skinned black girl that they got from

the worm love story I'm not sure about that but there's definitely that was so boring and such a waste of time that worm love story every time that worm love story every time that happened on the screen it was like this could be better allotted to aria just bring questions about what is a eunuch i thought eunuchs were totally false yeah right that's what i thought eunuch was too how are we having a physical love story at all yeah right he gets a city

i i think and some of these like you need masculine man like okay in the books this is not a spoiler i swear to god you'll be fine um there's a character named strong bell was or bell hoss strong bell was and um uh there's pit fighting which you've seen in the shows this guy is a very good pit fighter and he also serves as like uh kind of a right-hand man of calise not in like an intelligent sense but he's around and being protective and stuff like that and um uh strong belwas is a eunuch but he's big and he's strong and he's a gladiator and i'm like, so did they leave the balls there? Because I don't get how to be big and strong if you don't have balls. You're right.

Dedication and whey protein. Yeah, the slave master at Pintos or wherever she bought all the Unsullied goes into this at great extent. She's like, yeah, a boy who's been cut will never be as strong or ferocious, but he went into detail about how i remember that yeah yeah but he'll be more obedient and something else and yeah something like that but i it made me wonder if what a eunuch was was consistent throughout all the societies and cultures because like strong bilhas he just he vibes to me like a guy who's got a swing and pair even though he's a eunuch so yeah i don't know testosterone shots he's on the he's on the roids he's juicing that could be

it i'm sure they have that there right yeah maybe you could just eat bull testicles hold on we got the lord of light with the magic we can't have testosterone like like you know this is a minor ritual you like sacrifice a bull's nuts or something bam yeah shot done i like that. Like, you know, this is a minor ritual. You, like, sacrifice a bull's nuts or something. Bam. Testosterone shot. Done. I like that. But the show's picked up in the second half, in my opinion. And I'm not going to spoil anything. How many hundreds of hours is there on total on audio to be displaying in hour segments like this?

Based on what I know in the books, the last episode should be a must-watch. So I think that people will like it. Here are my predictions for the last episode, and I haven't read anywhere near where we are. I think that Cersei is going to die or something awful is going to happen to Cersei. I really hope the Mountain comes back into play as some sort of Franken-mountain because they've alluded to him twice this season. You should, like two or three times they went back and talked about the mountain

that he's being worked on and he's the frog, the work continues my queen. That creepy fucking maester. So I think Margaery and Loras are going to be all good. One of them might die. Loras might die, but I don't think so. I think they're both going to be all good. One of them might die. Loras might die, but I don't think so. I think they're both going to be good.

The Queen of Thorns and Littlefinger are both bringing armies, or at least something like that, to King's Landing to force the Sparrow's hand. And I think he's going to do something crazy then. There's going to be a big standoff. Some people are going to die. I'm hoping the Sparrow dies. He doesn't seem like a character that is going to be around for the long haul. Yeah, he's way too extreme.

He's not making any friends, is he? Yeah, he really is. Only the gods. Only the gods are his friends. It seems like he's made enemies anywhere and everywhere he can. The only person who might just think of him with indifference is, I think, is it Kevin Lannister or Jason Lannister?

Who's Cersei's uncle who's now Kevin? Yeah. Maybe he – I still like – I feel like even him, he looks at him with indifference. He's like, eh, whatever. I don't like the Sparrow's attitude of like, oh, I wear dirty robes and scrub the floor and talk condescendingly to you. It's like you're choosing to do this. Stop acting like you're better than everyone else under the auspice of being humble. Like that's the worst kind of – he's just a big humble brag.

The winners of these games, you know, like Lord Peter Baelish, you know, like they're coming out with like – you know, they're the people who, you know, will get their hands dirty, you know, are manipulating the system to its absolute extreme and don't give a shit about, like, the piety element of it. So, yeah. Yeah. I think he's playing the game the smartest. What do you guys think of Arya's storyline? I loved that in the book and felt they didn't pay enough attention to it and kind of excited where it's going with this.

What do you guys think of that? The assassin training style stuff? I like it. I like it i like it and you have to do something crazy like that with aria because i feel like otherwise she's not all that interesting to me um she's she aria i mean sansa is completely awful but aria is only a couple i said aria is only a couple degrees better like sansa i'm like no i can't stand that it's it's in the book and the show but i felt like the book stressed more how as part of the assassin as part of the assassin thing that she has to give up herself she has to stop being aria stark you know they ask her who is she i am nobody stuff like that in the book they really really work that and it makes you think that if she's going

to get any assassin training then she's going to herself from the whole Game of Thrones you know that list you know in the book they make it super clear you can't kill for yourself so is she gonna take herself out of this game I don't know I don't know about that because in the in the show in the books at least that whole organization seems a lot more cultish whereas in the show it's coming off more as like she's getting training for what the viewer is hoping will eventually be vengeance on those people, even though doing that would kind of go against the entire order of the Faceless Man. But I don't know. In the book, I'm becoming convinced that she's not going to be Arya Stark anymore. She's just going to join this thing and not do her list

because that's her new life. She's going to do the list. She's going to do the list. I think she will. She has to. I mean, you've seen the show right now. That's all she's concerned with. He enjoys crushing your expectations. He likes to set up something and then dash that. So, yeah, you're right.

That would be the normal progression of a hero or heroine. Yeah, she's getting the assassin training. Yeah, there's this injustice on her family and herself. And, yeah, now she's going to kick some ass. This would be just like Martin. Although I will say this. Back to Westeros.

That's how it would go. This is a storyline that's ripe for divergence, right? Like in the books, she might not do these things. But then in the show, she might follow through with them who knows but i mean she's just not interesting to me if she's killing people i don't care about you know what i mean like i just don't like i don't want to watch the adventures of aria the assassin even no matter how interesting it may be i'm here for the game of thrones and like, for the Game of Thrones. Not just the show. I'm here to see who's going to win this thing. I want to see big macro changes happening

in the Game of Thrones world. And titties. Lots of titties. I got that earlier. Here's what should have happened in that scene. Here's what should have happened in that scene. The dragon... So the Khaleesi should have pulled the spear out of the dragon. And then they should have had that moment where he

growls at her and snarls and you're scared and then he kind of smiles at her almost if a dragon can smile and there's this moment where you think that they have an understanding just sort of a moment where like she realized they both look at each other and they know

the same look that you're wearing on your shirt yeah bear with me here so she and the dragon stare at each other and they know that and you know the same look that you're wearing on your shirt yeah no no just bear with me here so so she and the dragon stare at each other and they both sort of understand this is where i'm going yeah they have a moment where there's understanding between them where she's like oh good you recognize me we don't have trouble right now you know i was helping you and he's like yeah totally and then he goes and like blows fire right at her but it's to kill the bad guys who were right behind her and for a moment you think she's dead

for a moment like the music you know bum bum bum and you see like horrified reactions from like tyrian and like the other main stars and then you look again and she's fucking naked as can be he's burnt all her clothes off and the dragon does like a swooping motion underneath her, and like she rides him away naked. Titties like bouncing as she goes. I want to say something. That should be bald, though. It's about the book, but it's not a spoiler at all. I swear this won't ruin anyone's enjoyment. Just to tell you how

disappointing it is, after the big pit scene where she flies off on a dragon, he spends the next 30 to 45 minutes talking about her bowel movements. That's how the book goes and then a feast actually the feast is first and then there's excruciating detail on her bowel movements well good you know i don't recall that portion of it i guess i won't reread that section

i let you know the calicis stay in regular during these trying times that no better to be you're wrong the Lord of Light again right fucking bowel movements like a pharmacy's yeah We're out of leeches Demonology keeps you regular Yeah yeah She should be getting naked all the time They all should be getting naked all the time I want Marjorie Tyrell To get like titty fucked or something I want some nudity in there Like all the hot chicks

It's the Game of Thrones porno My daughter hates I don't want to be ridiculous with it I just want Remember when Brad You could have a really decent plot But you you're supposed to want every scene to be- Dude, can you remember season one? Season one, a chick literally flashes her pussy, just cause, um, um, Tyrion's like, here's a coin. He's like, can I see it one more time? And just like, pussy, right there.

In the middle of a character development scene that wasn't even in the books yeah they wrote that scene to show you some pussy and that's what i want from game of thrones that scene was ross doesn't go to king's landing in the books ross just her storyline ends after after uh they leave winterfell like i don't think they ever pick her up again but but they brought her along to king's landing just so you'd have somebody to show ass and titties constantly they found a really hot chick, gave her a minor role. Then all of a sudden she's working for Littlefinger. She's in Joffrey's bedroom.

She's doing all this high-level shit. The whole point was ass and titties. They should still be doing that. What happened to her? Joffrey got her killed. Oh, did Joffrey ever kill? He shot her with a crossbow, I think. I forgot which one he shot.

I didn't realize it was the same. I think he shoots them all. In the books, he shoots lots of people with that crossbow. Joffrey's a dick. He was. He did such a good job. And as soon as he died. Oh, I know the actor.

Didn't you just fucking hate him the second he walked on the screen? You're like, fuck that guy. I loathe the actor and that fucking like smart ass face like yeah and then as soon as he died it was like i tip my hat to you sir you crushed it in that role you know like now i appreciate it yeah i thought they've done a phenomenal job with this another thing so i seriously is supposed to be really beautiful right and um i she is i look at her now she is everyone thinks she is but you woody just so you know i'm not a fan of cersei's either i don't know if it's like

the personality that goes along with it that's poisoning it for me but fuck well wait aren't we in season six is that right she's eight what season are we in five we're season five okay so it's the end of five she's aged five years during during this thing. And I'm like, don't forget, Woody. Everyone gets older. Please don't put pictures of five-year younger version of me because it's hard. So, yeah, Cersei's pretty hot. They maybe should have anticipated the thing going 10 years, Kyle.

Because, you know, by the end of this 10-year thing, Cersei will have a different look I think she's very beautiful even at her current age if you go back and I don't know how many nude scenes she's had in Game of Thrones but if you go back to 300 the original 300 she's the queen of Sparta and she gets nice and naked and bounces

on Gerard Butler for a while and she's you know why I love that scene she's got a smoking body dude you see sex scenes and they're missionary and I'm like oh yeah I get it they're a sex scene whatever you see sex scenes and he's tagging that from the back it gives a whole nother like insight into that relationship these two people have a passionate love for each other when he's hitting a doggy style like they do in 300 i'm like yes you know like it it it means more to me than missionary does it's like it says that not just that they love each other but that they lust each other and i i think it's you know if i

made movies i would use that to demonstrate that all yeah you ever see legends of the fall with uh brad pitt they had a dog version or they had a doggy no the real one they had a dog does anyone I would use that to demonstrate that all the time. Yeah, you ever see Legends of the Fall with Brad Pitt? No, the portal version? They had a doggie, no, the real one, they had a doggie. Does anyone just see Filthy like analyzing me as I say this? He's just like, yeah, go ahead Woody, this is interesting to me, go on. It's okay man, like you know, a lot of

my research was with the BDSM population as a whole, so we have all sorts of really interesting research studies out there. One of the studies I did was a study on switches. So we actually recruited people who take a top or a bottom role, and we randomly assigned them to a top or a bottom role for the portion of the study itself. And then we did lots of readings and tests on them during this. So what you're saying is really tame.

It's what I do in my professional life outside of Twitch. So don't worry about it. We're not judging anything. It's all totally reasonable. Doggy style? Oh my God. You know, like, it's not a big deal. Yeah, come back to me when you're pegged, Woody.

You being a little judgy. I'm sorry, Kyle. I cut you off. I just saw filthy I was gonna say you won't get any judgment out of me Woody don't worry Kyle gently stroke it be like it's okay don't listen to the bad man

sorry about what happened earlier I love your rubbery soul that never happens to me really could have used batteries as long I mean it's not like you're getting a lot of use and that thing is highly effective i gotta say and i feel like the the best sex toys definitely come uh they plug into the wall the hitachi magic wand uh if you want if you want to get your girlfriend something for a birthday that's what you want you want that big fucking gigantic

120 volt vibrator that's the one that masquerades around it's like a back yeah it's a neck massage maybe originally i don't think anyone's buying back massager it's got it's got two settings low and screaming orgasm it's it's it's highly effective uh and it's it yeah the best sex toys come with a you know ac adapter yeah get behind that. Nice. Wow. I suddenly had a standstill. You got any more AMA questions you want to get to?

We're almost at four hours. That's a great idea, actually. Let's look. Oh, a meetup event for Europeans. A meetup event? So we start off with Europeans. Meetup. So we sometimes do meetup event for Europeans. A meetup event? So we start off with a meetup. So we sometimes do meetup events. The last one was a paintball thing in Chicago. The next one will be too.

That's set in stone now. So July 25th. No. In Chicago. Yeah, in Chicago. I'm like fucking like half. It'd be so easy. You want to come?

Yeah, come, man. We're playing paintball. Yeah, it's a cute scenario paintball event. The Wolf's coming too, by the way. Do I need any practice? Do I need any expertise? I've been paintballing twice. No, it's more fun for us if you don't.

No, you can play with us, and we can probably hook you up with a good deal too. All right. When is this? July 1? Is it the 12th? I'm sorry. I should know this off the top of my head.

I think it's July 12th. It's that weekend. But if you go to pvbomb.com, know this off the top of my head. I think it's July 12th. It's that weekend But if you go to PV bomb calm They have all the information there and you can pre-register. I think that's Saturday We're gonna be doing like a pka day only. I don't know if the park will still be open, but we'll definitely have Saturday will definitely be an opportunity for all of our fans to get together with us and play Maybe I was thinking maybe it depending on how many there were last time, I think we had plenty of people to do this, though.

Maybe breaking up in a couple of squads. Like, I get a squad of guys, Woody gets a squad of guys. We do it like pick-up basketball and do some little round-robin type mini-tournament stuff. Just some quick rounds of Surge and Destroy or a team deathmatch, 6v6, 8v8, something like that. Something that's more conducive to the smaller fields they have there. Because I felt like last time we were playing like 20 versus 20, 50 versus 50, and it was a little crazy. So that would be fun.

But then Sunday they're opening it up for the massive Call of Duty scenario game, the World at War, I believe they call it. And they do have, of course, if you've played those COD games, the Nuke Town map built to scale exactly like it is in the game, painted the same, The mannequins are there. The bus is there. All the signs, everything 100% authentic. A lot of fun to play there as long as you don't have

too many players. That's what's going to be happening Sunday. The dates. The dates are July 11th and 12th. That's a Saturday and a Sunday. July 11th and 12th. We'll probably fly in on the 10th and fly out on the 13th. You could do the same.

I'm close enough that I would be remiss not to at least check in. Totally check in and hang out with us, et cetera. Yeah, it'd be fun. Yeah, we'll take care of you. So yeah, we're doing this again, paintball event. If you go to pbbomb.com and at the top click on their event calendar you can see there's a link to it yeah and and as soon as you can you're going to want to start pre-registering for this thing because what we saw last time was like some people didn't do it

correctly they didn't go through the process like i stressed all along and they didn't end up even playing with us like i'd run into guys he's like yeah yeah i came and i'm like well what are you doing he's like we're going to play over here i'm like you realize if you'd said when you got here that I'm with the PKA group or you had, you had signed up beforehand that you'd be playing with us, right? Like we have our own personal little group where it's me and Woody and, and Chiz last time and Joe Lozon and then like 80 or 90 of you. And you know, you get FaceTime with us. We all, we're all playing the game together.

We hang out together all weekend. So, so if you pre-register, then you'll be sure to get that right. Another thing is they have different levels of guns and you you pre-register, then you'll be sure to get that right. Another thing is, they have different levels of guns, and you can pre-register in a good gun. Taylor's used the bad, I don't want to call them bad, but like the gravity-fed

hoppers before, and you were at a severe disadvantage compared to the better hoppers and the better guns. I've heard it a couple times, and it's been a number of years. Do you allow alcohol at these events? I don't think so. Really? Yeah. You can smuggle it in. The easiest way is to

smuggle it in in your stomach five minutes before. I didn't notice anybody had alcohol at the whole thing and I didn't think they sold it there. I don't know if they have a policy. I just went down a notch in my books. What was I going to say?

Oh, yeah, yeah, but the gun makes a huge difference. Is that your gun, Kyle? Yeah, it's in the current configuration. This is my Die Damn, which I love oh, oh, oh so much. Magfed first strike. I got cameras all over it, top and bottom. I got my barrel taken off now, but recently I've been putting a rotor on top and running.

I got 40 first strikes down here i think 200 regular paintballs and then i got a huge harness with like 2 000 paintballs on my back camera here camera on my head and uh i just fucking destroy noobs i got a coiled remote now so i just got the other gun you're showing me is down for the count you can also kill squirrels with this right you could totally kill a fucking squirrel with this. Absolutely. These things hurt like a motherfucker. Yeah, they do. Yeah, I've shot you with a first strike before.

That's right. That's when I shot you in the hand that time. Yeah, you made my hand bleed. What comes first strike versus a regular strike? A first strike paintball is like a – it's a conical projectile that has sort of rifling grooves cut into the sides of it so it fires like a bullet you know it's spinning like a football it's much much more accurate it shoots it's more efficient so if the gun was going to shoot 280 feet per second with regular paint when you put a first strike in it'll shoot like 310 310 feet per second and there's more accurate they hurt a lot more and only

specific they fly straight so expensive you have a scope set up and such then you can you know even snipe with them which is pretty cool so but yes so we have paintball event coming up july eleventh and twelfth we should start saying that because we keep saying july twelfth but yeah july eleventh and twelfth at PB bomb calm pre-reg. You'll hang out with us and you'll be sure to get one of the good guns. Yes, that's pretty important. There's a couple levels of guns and their best gun, which package, which isn't all that more expensive, is just infinitely better than the semi-automatic tipman or something like that. Having electronic marker really,

there are moments where you get shot. You like come around a corner and there's the guy and like there's not time to go boom and just get him. With these electronic markers you can come around the corner and be like, oh shit! And just shoot 30 times in a second and just really fuck everything up in front of you. I definitely recommend the electro marker at the last event we had a couple like father son groups at previous years we had a lot of father son people and i thought it was pretty cool like it i don't know like if you're a dad out there and you're hearing this it's like you know like what are you going to do that weekend otherwise like make a mow the yard or just sit around the house or who knows what

the alternative is to come play paintball with him and have something that you guys talk about for years you know just do it get off your ass play some paintball with us you're gonna be so happy and it's a great workout i uh i think it's about time for me to start running again uh getting in shape for the next one and uh get my cardio back up to par again stupid sexy kyle working out for people you've got to it's two full days of running uh so so i like to start running about a month in advance so it's about time again yeah let's do another ma okay so you got i'm looking quick two masked men have burst into your room one is unarmed you think and the other has a crowbar. How do you react?

Well. Cry. We just happen to all have, like, loaded weapons next to us. Lucky me. I look at them straight in the face. Is this the right house? I take another sip of whiskey, calmly assessing the situation. Meanwhile, in Georgia, Kyle unlocks the fucking shoulder look

the shoulder fucking support on the gun it's uh this is a chris vector if you've ever played like modern warfare 2 this is the chris vector it was on uh uh modern weapon on future weapons uh a few years back your name has this tag in front of it fps which i stand i assume is first person shooter right it is which i avoid at all costs so every time you know like COD or this I'm like I'm like filling in acronyms of my next COD oh Call of Duty okay I got this yeah yeah that's reached my four-hour limit for this group video call yeah you just click the video thing again and it powers you back up apparently yeah for me you stay um like faded

out for a while but it's better than better than just the picture yeah so i would reach for my gun and i think that's the best option if my gun wasn't here i would reach for well i guess i've got a little knife here that would be a step in the right direction relationships what's that yeah i'd begin diplomatic relationships yeah i just feel like hey you guys want to hang out I think you got man. Oh, man. We're gonna leave Yeah, I was waiting for you Just like like like spit in it and be like come on That would freak them out and out. just be gone. I've got a question

for Filthy. I didn't sort of finish my line of questioning. What do you do after your ride on YouTube and Twitch? At some point, Civ won't be an interesting game anymore. What's your long-term plan? A lot of my degree is actually stats-based.

My master's degree. So I have a lot of statistical training. So I think what we're kind of looking at right now is I've given this a year. It's grown. It's interesting. It's fun. It doesn't pay all that well yet. We'll give it some more time.

My girlfriend is still pursuing her PhD, so we have time in the area. So I'm not in any particular rush for that. But at some point what will probably end up happening, assuming this doesn't take off, which seems fairly likely that it won't take off to some massive degree, that I expect that I will try to leverage the degree into something, potentially, hopefully in the gaming field, honestly.

I look at Blizzard staff and Blizzard staff uses a lot of statistical techniques that I'm familiar with that I can use as resale value for there. So, we'll see. Ideally, something in this world that I'm familiar with that I can use as resale value for there. We'll see. Ideally, something in this world that I'm in now, but potentially using the skill set that I already have and the education

I already have. I guess LeBron James just flashed his dick on TV if anyone wants to see. You know I do. Let me send this along to you then. Let's make sure I'm not sharing it with the stream. Yeah.

Why did he do this? I don't think he meant to. I think he's sort of doing like a motion where he's like moving his shorts down and then up or something or untucking a shirt, and somehow some cock and balls were exposed. Yeah, it looks like an accident. Poor guy. Poor guy. he seems okay

even lebron james wouldn't need a special mouth for his auto blow any size penis 123 points through his first three games it's an nba record you know like we all look back on we all like you guys are old enough but you look back on the jordan days as like the greatest player to have ever lived lebron belongs in this conversation i mean jordan never scored 123 points in three games how many championships has that guy won i don't know but he's lost a couple too enough for a ring on every finger yet? Probably not. What that really means is that Jordan led the best teams of all time, right? LeBron's had teammates.

LeBron is not as good of a player as Michael is. I don't know enough about basketball to say either way. I don't know enough about basketball either. But I feel like I've watched enough videos that break this down and go back and forth and talk about the stats and the things they did and the help they both had i just feel like lebron's not the same not the player jordan was malik rose has won like three or four championships and charles barkley's won none my i know malik rose in particular because he went to drexel which is where i got my undergrad degrees um that doesn't mean he's a better player. Championships is only one way to measure a player.

Well, we're talking about a guy who's the leader of a team. He's supposed to be this. You're saying, oh, this is the best player that's ever played the game before, or he's supposed to be in that argument. He should be the best in the game, the best in the world, should be able to lead a team of really good guys. Not any team, but good players. And LeBron's had good players.

He had good players in Miami. I mean, the team that's surrounding LeBron right now, a lot of people would argue pales in comparison to the teams that surrounded Michael Jordan. Where's the Scottie Pittman on this team? Well, the competition's different, too. He's not playing against Larry Bird, is he? No.

I mean, it's a different version of basketball. It's a different era as well. Like's a different version of basketball it's a different era as well like if you throw what would happen if you threw michael jordan into this era with all of the advantages that lebron's had i bet he stomped i bet he stomped lebron it's hard to argue his prime now i feel like the thing about jordan is that i feel like he's still good enough to be the best right there in the game like it you know if you if you grab some guy from like you know like wilt chamberlain right well chamberlain was amazing but would he do more than shack like it seems like the body advantage he had like well chamberlain did what he did a bunch of against a bunch of tall slow white guys right like um shack did his thing against

some incredible athletes and but jordan yeah he played against some incredible athletes. But Jordan, he played against some incredible athletes too. You could drop Prime Jordan into a 2015 setup, and he'd still be incredible. I feel like before you start comparing LeBron to Michael, you have to figure out if LeBron's as good as Kobe. Right now, yeah. But they're comparing their careers. I kobe's got a much better much stronger career he's won championships with and without shack um he seems like the guy who's led

different teams uh in different situations against different kinds of uh competition to championships and uh and he's got i don't know how i think he's got five as well he's got several i wish my basketball knowledge was infallible like i really knew it but and uh and he's got i don't know how i think he's got five as well he's got several like he does i wish my basketball knowledge was infallible like i really knew it but but mine's not lebron is supposed to be the guy who passes the guy who has all these assists he makes his whole team better more so than any of these other stars right kobe's the selfish player and you know while kobe's great i'd rather have lebron on my team if i played in the nba right now me and i suck lebron would get me some baskets he'd just find me you know he's amazing at it clearly right now at this

moment lebron's the best it seems like the best guy playing basketball at this moment uh i yeah you know especially since there's only two teams technically playing right now right he seems like the mvp of these current finals. But I don't know. If you get in your time machine and you somehow have Jordan have his career in the 21st century, I don't know. I feel like he had such a determination,

such a work ethic that... I don't know. I just don't see that from LeBron. LeBron doesn't seem to be... Jordan was cruel. Jordan... We talk about how when Filthy was playing today, he was like,

now it's time to punish some people. I feel like that's what Jordan said when he walked out on the court. Time to go punish some people. It's time to make some people realize that they might be the best in their neighborhood or the best in their state, but when they're on this court, they're not the best of anything. I feel like that's what Jordan was when he went out there. LeBron's just a big guy

with lots of talent. There you go. You're totally the jordan of sieve right like why not it is like i think that's a good that's we'll just start marketing ourselves that way yeah like like get an editor get somebody to photoshop and you know how jordan's got that famous like thing where he's like levitating doing the the free throw line donk that's all over the Jordan shoes. Just you with the fucking keyboard and mouse. Just that silhouette. Same thing.

Perfect. Perfect. All right. So let's call this a wrap. That was Painkiller already, episode 234. Thank you so much to Dollar Shave Club, Autoblow 2, and Filthy Robot. Not sure if this is the first time. Yeah, thanks for coming on, man.

Check out Filthy Robot. He has a YouTube channel and a Twitch stream. Kyle. And he has a really interesting donation animation. Make it happen. That's the default. Thanks. So, yeah, seriously, thanks for coming on. I thought you did great. Yeah, you did a great job, man.

You piped in way more than a lot of people who are way too quiet and don't get involved. It was fun. You did really well. Are we like, this part won't go up? No, we're still live. We're still live, just so you know. Usually I tell you. Can we talk about those darkies yet?

That's what I'm going to do. No, but so on his stream today, I invited him, and I was like, hey, it's a gaming podcast, but usually we go talk about more than just games, whatever's funny, et cetera, tell stories, et cetera. And he's like, oh, the pressure, the pressure. But but now it's all said and done and you rocked it. So anyway, I am going to cut the show right here. Thank you so much. Good night, everyone.