Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #272

Episode Date: March 13, 2016

This week on PKA, the most epic Hank Green joins the guys and they talk a lot about the political scene and the craziness that is Donald Trump, Kyle makes a strong stance that all vaginas are ugly and they go over how fair is Fair Use.

We're live, PKA episode 272, and thank you Hank Green. I just got a bit of a shock right before we went live, and I don't know where to go with it. We'll get to that later. We of course have a very special guest, Hank Green, with us tonight, a Vlogbrothers fame, also Sideshow Crash Course, maybe you're familiar with those channels. Also a co-creator of VidCon, I didn't even know that about you, that's very cool. We have four, four, count them, four special sponsors tonight. MeUndies, Squarespace.com, Tracker, a brand new one, and LootCrate.com. Check the link in the description for all of those. We're going to talk more about them later in the show, but first things first.

Wait, what is first? What do we want to talk about first? All right, before the show, we were talking about dead dogs. Very sad. Very sad to hear that your dog passed, Hank. As we said before the show, Taylor's dog passed recently as well. And Woody's dog just late last year passed. Don't let him co-opt our pain. I didn't mean to. Hey, Taylor, can you turn your gain down a touch? Oh, wow, yeah.

So we can talk about dead pets. I have somewhere to go with that, I think. Or we could talk about the thing with Trump. I have a little bit of a story that went down today at the thing is the thing with Trump the part where he exists at all is that the thing with Trump or is there a broader thing with Trump is the thing with Trump the fact that there's this man who are paying attention to right now and 49% Hank CNN I watched a Vlogbrothers video

and I'm not sure if it was you or your brother, so my apologies. But the takeaway from it was, look, even if your guy doesn't win this, have some comfort in the idea that the other half of the nation isn't completely idiotic.

Was that you? I don't know know i get confused too between us i'm not i'm not entirely sure which one's which anymore but yeah i there i mean that's the thing about democracy you have to like you have to kind of agree that america works and that the whole idea of voting it's certainly not half of the country but at least the half that voted uh disagreed with you. And just chill out and deal with it. That's not how I felt when I was a young man

and George W. Bush got elected and I was a very super commie-liberal guy. And I was very angry. But, you know, I'm kind of shockingly moderate now. I think that if old me some current me

he'd be real disappointed but uh... yeah you gotta go ahead and say all right we're gonna do the american thing and people disagree with me and let's just do this for four years and maybe i'm wrong maybe i'm wrong i think uh... i think what a lot of people are saying is that they don't like the way that that that america's saying is that they don't like the way that America is going right now. They don't, they see that they keep electing these officials and they don't feel like these elected officials who are supposed to literally be their representatives, literally, are not

their representatives. You know, they're representing big corporations, they're representing special interests, or they're just representing themselves so that they can continually stay in this position of power with all of the frills and things that come along with it. So a lot of people are saying this Trump guy is just kind of telling the truth and I think the fact that he self-finances his campaign thus far, we'll see if he does in the primary because that literally cost a billion dollars to run a primary campaign in this country. Well he's got it.

This is the primary. He's got it. Yeah, Ron General. We know what he means. The general election, yeah's got it. This is the primary. He's got it. Right? Yeah, Ron General. We know what he means. The general election. Yeah, thank you. But I think what it comes down to is a lot of people are really latching onto that and

saying, I don't know who pulls Ted Cruz's strings. I don't know who pulls Marco Rubio's strings. But I know for sure who pulls Donald Trump's strings. It's Donald fucking Trump and And and maybe the best but like no is better than the son of a bitch You know you know who I trust more than Donald Trump is like literally every corporation in America all pulling Really? I'm like if we have all of them pulling the little string. I don't want one person on the string That's the worst did you see Trump's speech today?

I don't want one person on the string. That's the worst. Did you see Trump's speech today? Trump is like Ron from from fucking from for the Marvel Universe. He has no string So the question is did you see Trump's speech day who here saw it just me? I? Okay, all right so in there he's talking about free trade and Trump says you know what carrier just shipped 1,400 jobs To Mexico he's talking about the importance of the wall and how they're going to build it and stuff. And he's like, this is easy to fix. I like that you tied those two things together. Like, we're going to build a wall so Carrier can't ship jobs to Mexico.

He wants to really control the in and out. The physical idea of jobs cannot pass through the wall Donald Trump can build. Air conditioners cannot pass without regulation. I think that's his core of it. And he's like, let me go for a second here. All right.

You told me to interrupt. That was part of the deal. You said that right before we started. I'm sorry. He meant interrupt me or Taylor. All right. I did it. And I don't take it back either. But I'm such a dick. All right, all right. I did, and I don't take it back either.

But I'm trying to get my thought out. So Carrier shipped jobs to Mexico, and he's like, look, this is easy to fix. We just put a 35% tax on air conditioners coming from Mexico, and that will solve this problem. They'll just change their mind, a tariff, and they'll keep the jobs here in the U.S. And that's protectionism, right? Yeah. Oh, man. Wow. It sounds great at first. It doesn't sound great to me at all. But again, I am politically weird. Okay. So as I heard it, my knee jerk reaction know, I went to school, I have a business degree, whatever, as one of my degrees. And it was like, you know.

Just drop the fact that you don't have just one degree. I'm a dick. Make sure we know that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're going to cover that several times, I hope. But anyway, so, because most of the people here think of my computer degrees, not my business one. But anyway, Taylor, can you turn your gain up higher? Taylor Muckerman You are so good.

Taylor Muckerman And can I say, you really need to put those degrees in glass behind you so that you can just point backwards. Taylor Muckerman They're in the Game of Thrones room, but maybe we could get copies and put them in all the rooms. Taylor Muckerman So if an engineering or a computer question or a business question comes up, you can be like, all right, so just first things first, let me just... Taylor Muckerman These good people here, standing in... comes up you can be like art so just first things first let me just these

good people here so the upside of protectionism is in the short term it saves your job right your job doesn't get shipped out carrier is gonna be like 35% tariff shucks that'll be anti-competitive in addition to all the other challenges that come with having like remote manufacturing locations we just won't do it but in the long term your country or your in your protected industries become unprotected become they fall behind like yeah the soviet union had a real protectionist economy and then when they finally knocked down the wall you're like holy shit these cars look like they're from the 50s right and and these tractors and the way

that you do farming and the way that you do manufacturing. Everything they built was just like sort of big hunks of iron. Yeah, I mean, the story of human progress is the story of trade. That is how all of the great things that have happened got done. It's the transfer of ideas and the transfer of skills. And, like, that's a big big philosophical thing and that's sort of how like that's how i come at things sometimes and that's of course like means shit all to the people losing their jobs like what like that fucking like who the fuck cares at that point maybe we need some level of protection and and here's why trump was winning me over today. Oh, my God. Embarrassing to say. Wow. That's energy.

Right? I've got becoming more high energy than I was previously. Because, look, some of the things that America makes are high-tech stuff. They just insta-steal, copy, and replicate. If we make something like America dominates the entertainment industry globally, right? All those animated cartoons and stuff, Frozen andrek and whatever that happens here there aren't a lot of chinese equivalents to to that and they just take that for free and dub it or whatever like they steal so much of what we make but then on the way back whatever china makes rubber sharks

and fucking legos or whatever. You know, like, we don't just copy that. Like, we're honoring their intellectual property and then, of course, a lot of it's physical goods. And they're stealing from us. It's not intellectual property. It's physical goods. And you can't, like, this is, the things that China is shipping to us is basically

human labor. And what China is saying is, look, the people who live here have a lower quality of life. They have a lower expectation for what their lives are going to be like. So they are willing to work for less. Same. And like America has an extremely high quality of life. People talk about how like America is like going in the wrong direction, but it's pretty freaking wonderful here. We have a lot going for us. We have a great social safety net. We have the like amazing health care system.

There are categories. There's always a category in which somebody's better than us. But Americans have it pretty good, especially compared to the places where we are sending jobs. The reason we're sending jobs to those places is because there's people there willing to work for less money. Now, a little bit of me is, you know, I'm not such a strong American here, but I'm kind of a little bit like, well, if we're making a job somewhere, if we're making somebody's life better somewhere, that's also good. You know, people in China need jobs too. They're not real people. They're not real people. Not real people.

not real people shaking heads yeah no no like I'm like just the fact that like what if like to have a conversation where we get shake heads I feel like so frequently what we're kind of the reason why we're getting so

excited about like Bernie Sanders and Donald Trump is because we never have conversations between people who disagree with each other anymore we have conversations on the internet where we talk about how evil the other side is, how they don't understand. And we only get information from our filter bubble that says, hey, you are right. You're right. You're right.

You're right. You're right. And then when we see people from the other side, it's always the most extreme bullshit that that like they found some asshole somewhere who said something super fucking dumb like maybe what I just said about people in China needing jobs too and and we never get this conversation going between people who disagree with each other so you end up with a bunch of bunch of people who like literally cannot fathom a human being who disagrees with them

and so the only way to think about a Trump supporter for me is to think about like somebody who is clearly like a bad person and I feel like I feel like we get the like literally like if you if there's if there are legitimate Trump supporters in this room it's the first time in my life I've met one that's's not- and I'm not fucking with you. Like, I have super- super conservative, uh, in-laws, and I hang out with them, but they fucking hate Donald Trump. They're like, He insulted the Pope! You can't insult the Pope! Like, uh-

That's- wait, wait, wait. That's the reason that they don't like Trump. Yeah! No, I don't know! I can't explain. Did you hear what he said about the Pope? He called him a loser. I can't find that kind of candidate. He took one of his hats. You know, he's a loser. He said he was a real lightweight. He had low energy. Low energy Pope.

Compared to the other people on the Republican side, I find Trump to be actually less offensive than a lot of them. There's something really interesting about that. The fact that Donald Trump is like, you know, Planned Parenthood does good work. I'm not going to fund them. But that that was like what the fuck just happened yes that has never happened in the history of the republican and i think that says a lot about sort of like a lot of what we're running into is that the republican party is kind of fucked right now like they have gotten themselves into a really weird position you can do that so um i think yeah

the three of us on this show are a lot more pro-gun than most people are. And classic Trump, which is my favorite term. I heard it from Chiz tonight. As opposed to Trump Zero. Classic Trump was against assault weapons, right? He was like, you know, I think the Second Amendment is important, but assault weapons, they got to go. Now, Trump Zero, the current one, he – He's high energy.

He loves assault weapons. Yeah, he's all about guns – He's high energy. He loves assault weapons. Yeah, he's all about guns. He's – he don't touch them. Well, the nice thing about – Well, if you call him New Trump instead of Trump Zero, then it's only a matter of time until he comes back. Classic Trump. Look, you said that we don't have conversations between people who disagree anymore. But today I witnessed one of these conversations going down.

So we're at the gym today with my girlfriend. And a gentleman comes in. We're in the back of the gym. We're just sitting there resting. Actually, I'm not doing anything. This guy comes in and he starts talking about Ted Cruz to the guy who owns the gym, runs the gym at the counter. He starts talking all this Ted Cruz nonsense, how Donald Trump is dividing the GOP party,

how we need to get behind a real establishment candidate who stands for core values how this is our guy and and the guy at the uh gym is just not having he's like you need to get the fuck up out of here brother you in trump country up in here you need to get the fuck up out of here and then some of the guys that are working out are like yeah get the fuck out of here man and! And then my girlfriend, my girlfriend screams, BUILD THE WALL! And everybody goes, YEAH! BUILD THE WALL! BUILD THE WALL!

And this guy literally is shamed out of the gym. Wow. That's not a conversation, that does not seem to be a productive conversation. No. It was highly productive. That does not seem to be like a productive conversation. No, no. About politics. It was highly productive. That seems to me a little bit like somebody who has objectified at all people who disagree with them, which is something that we've become really good at.

We're seeing people who disagree with us as fucking idiots because we only hear the one source of information. And that terrifies me. To think that there's a gym in America I wouldn't be welcoming because I don't think that we should build a concrete wall that's not going to do anything to stop people from concrete doesn't stop those. You've got to build that thing out of titanium at least. It's going to be a big, beautiful wall.

You keep talking smack, Hank. Ten more feet. Ten more feet. Ten feet higher. Every time he says that, I just I get like... What's weird about the Trump people saying, the first comeback, the whole wall thing is always like, the wall wouldn't even keep anybody out.

It's like, well, if we build the wall that fucking Donald Trump seems to want to make, based on the comments he's said, people will not be crossing that wall. It will be a monolithic thing across the skyscape. It seems to work in the Battle of Helm's Deep. You gotta remember, this is a hypothetical wall that will

never and can never exist. It can and it will. It will send all of our felons to guard it. It is an idea wall. It is a wall built of ideas and the idea is that there are people who are out to get Americans. And it's a scary idea that has no basis in reality. I've seen them on TV.

Wait, what do you mean? Wait, wait, you can't make a statement that says, oh, there's this false reality where people are out to get America. What a crazy, loony nonsense. Like, yeah, there are people who would like to kill some Americans. But they're not, well, they're not Mex. There's no, like, Al-Qaeda Mexico. Yeah, there's cartels.

I'm sure they have cartels. Yeah, the cartels, they're interested in selling in the free market of selling us heroin and pot. Like, they also like to come across the border and kidnap people and hold them for ransom. They do that a lot. They do. They do that good in Mexico. I think that they do that a lot is maybe

a little bit of a scarier sentence than the reality. They do it more than is acceptable. How many kidnappings would not be scary to you? A few dozen. I'm okay. If we stop after a couple dozen, I'm good. Think about the things that should be scary to us.

You know? Like, what should we be scared of? I know someone whose daughter was killed. Bulls outside their fences. They didn't even negotiate. The first thing they did was they sent the guy his daughter's pinky finger. First thing. That's fucking awful.

But think about it. Why do people want to limit assault weapons in America like like take take this from your perspective because people fucking run into schools with assault rifles and shoot people so what should we be doing in that situation should we be maybe limiting the number of assault rifles or should we say this isn't actually a public health problem in America it happens pretty

rarely and and like in terms of gun violence, that's not the real problem. The real problem is people shooting each other because of like actual gun violence that actually kills people, which is mostly suicide. The reason like people die of gunshot wounds in America?

Mostly suicide. We don't talk about that. We talk about school shootings because that's the thing that gets people excited. So you're talking about the things that get people excited. We're not talking about real issues. Like look excited We're not talking about real issues like look at us lots of reasons Why the wall would be good it would be it would just be nice to have a defined Pretend like Trump's not even the thing if not I want a wall. I actually want a wall down. I Okay, they're coming to America to take

the jobs that Americans don't want. That's what they're taking. Those are the jobs they're taking. They're like, what do you see Mexican immigrants doing in America? They're, they're, they're harvesting crops. They're, they're working lawns. They're doing construction jobs. They're doing, doing jobs that here in Montana are done by Montanans, but if somebody would do them for cheaper, they absolutely would be done by those people. Are you in favor of the free market? This is what immigration does. This is how immigration works. And immigration has classically been very good for the American economy. Well, I-

They're more than welcome to those jobs, but they have to come through the door in Trump's big fucking wall first. All right. Well, it doesn't seem like Trump's interested in opening that door either, because this isn't about having a good immigration policy, it's about scaring people into voting for him. It's about saying, there's this other thing out there that's terrible and scary, and it's gonna come take your job, it's gonna destroy your way of life, you've got all this, you have your identity built up in the way that you understand the world

like that the world should It's kind of how every single candidate is though to an extent is they all have their boogeyman that they kind of waste on you and say this is what you need to be afraid of If you're Bernie Sanders you better be afraid of those ten guys in the back room

you know that all of evil men Bernie Sanders will absolutely try and convince you that high frequency trading is ruining your life, Hank. Oh, my gosh. Those Wall Street guys and their high frequency trading, it's ruining America. And I'm like, I don't know. I make like four trades a year. Like, I'm not sure this really impacts me that someone beats me to it by a penny. Like, yeah.

Are you saying he's out of touch. Or, you know, the other thing about Bernie Sanders is, hey, I'm going to buy you all the stuff you like. What do you want? Low first-time mortgage homeowner stuff? You want some free college? I got some free college here. Medical? Oh, yeah.

All the medical you want. I am the candidate of free stuff. You just need a little spending money? Yeah, right? All minimum salary, minimum wage. And just call me when you need some more. You don't have a phone? Here's a phone. And it's

just promises, promises, and you know... It's all just lollipops and gumdrops with Bernie Sanders, and it's all going to come crumbling down eventually. So I'm old, and I've been voting. The first guy I voted for was in 92. Who was it?

Ross Perot. Oh! Yeah. Whatever. So that wasn't really a vote. He got like 20% of the vote. Yeah, I don't know. In five seconds.

If he had gotten 25%, then his party would have been eligible for automatic funding in the next thing, so it was kind of a big deal. Oh, yeah, yeah. Anyway, I've never, until this year, really not had a candidate that I like at all.

I've always heard, when people took the position of, you know what, they're all bad, I would think, no, no, no. You know, you kind of have to choose one. Pick a side. Pick a guy. Back them. Even if you choose some minor league one, do a thing.

But I've always had someone who was like 80% with me. This year, that doesn't feel true. Yeah. Kasich. I feel like he seems like a further, he seems closer to more of a middle-of-the-road Republican than any of the guys out there, and he's also not despicable, which I like about him. And he's one of the few left. So just a recap for anybody who cares, the important stuff that's happened this week

is that Ben Carson has essentially suspended his campaign. He said that there's no way forward for him to go. He will not be at tonight's debate at 9 p.m. in Detroit. Should have been more high energy. Kasich absolutely should have been. He was the lowest energy of all candidates. I've never seen anyone with lower energy. Not in the presidential campaign.

In the world. Ben Carson, his mission accomplished, man. He sold his books. That's what the whole point of this thing was from the world. Ben Carson, his mission accomplished, man. He sold his books. That's what the whole point of this thing was from the start. So he's pulling out, throwing his support behind Trump. You've also got who else was it that's recently pulled out?

What's his name? You're not thinking of Jed. Chris Christie. Chris Christie's really fiending the VP spot, isn't he? Of course. I don't know if maybe it hasn't, we haven't had a show since, but Chris Crispy, as they call him, the Crispy Cream Man, I always see him with a Krispy Kreme hat and stuff. There's so many great cartoons and memes

of Donald and Chris Crispy. Like Chris is this enormous, fat, bulbous war machine or something like that all the time. What's he like in the comics? So, obviously, he endorses Trump, completely splitting himself from the GOP vanguard, you know, the old school guys like Romney and McCain that everybody think of when they think of the big guys in the Republican Party.

The conservatives, people who represent the conservative ideology rather than whatever the fuck's going on. People who represent losing because that's all those people have ever done. They're weak. They're losers. Aren't all of them currently elected? Didn't they all win their last election? Chris Christie is a governor right now.

We're talking about the presidency. We're talking about the presidency, though. And of New Jersey. You've got Romney and guys like McCain who couldn't get it done. They couldn't get it done time and time again. And so you have Romney's day chastising Trump and his speech, really blistering speech, lots of name-calling, didn't hold anything back,

really took the gloves off. He did fail to say which candidate he'd throw his weight behind, simply saying that it should be someone else, anyone else, it seemed. There are whispers behind the scenes that suggest that Rubio, or excuse me, that Mitt Romney himself might try to jump into this if there's some sort of a contested convention. Oh, that sounds like so much fun. You know, like, this has been, for me, a pretty awful primary season, not gonna lie. It's pretty stressful, don't like it, but

gonna go down in the history of books that's for sure i really really hate the romney thing so uh it it appears that romney is vying for this like he wants to be the republican representative in spite of the fact that he didn't win and as much as i dislike trump and dislike hillary and dislike I really, really, really hate the idea that we would no longer be a representative democracy. So if they just grab some guy who wasn't voted and he becomes the Republican nominee and I get hold on. He said that that's the thing that they're thinking about doing. I've been reading stories about that for weeks now. Like this is sort of a public secret that you've got in the GOP established.'m sorry I'm sorry to jump in but but but

like I just want to like in the GOP establishment you have all of these billions of dollars of special interest money the corporation money all of the all the Koch brothers all these motherfuckers who are just old as time and represent a gone-by way and I ask you if you call them the Koch brothers because that's a fun name you have for them? I was asking. Is that how it's really pronounced? Is it Koch? What is it?

No, let's just call them the Koch brothers. All right, that's fine with me. In what way is that not the better thing to call them? Why would you ever stop? No, I don't think that's the correct thing. No, they're the Koch brothers. People like that who are trying to make our lives a little worse so that their lives are a lot better. People behind the scenes pulling the strings, behind the GOP, behind the entire Republican Party are losing their fucking minds right now.

This was never the plan. Yeah, no, no. That is definitely true. Trump was their attack dog. When they needed somebody to go against Obama and say, you weren't born in this country, you're a Kenyan, where's your birth certificate, where are your college transcripts, and say the dirty things that Mitt Romney couldn't lower himself to say, it was

Trump that did it. And as Trump said today, Mitt Romney came to him and begged for his endorsement. Trump said, he would have gotten on his knees if I told him to. I loved when he said that, because it's kind of a, you know, you could take that two ways. Maybe he'd suck my dick for that. That's absolutely what Trump meant. With Trump, he really might have. Juan Williams said it tonight on the air. He's like,

I think that's what he meant there. I it um so so when i see mitt romney coming out there and saying all that stuff about trump's tax returns what do you remember all the shit that romney went through and do you know when he released his it was in like september or something months from now about so i read an article about trump and his tax returns he's being audited right now so this news organization who seemed pretty unbiased nonpartisan to me talked to like 10 different tax attorneys and said would you advise your client if they're in trump's position to release their tax returns in the middle of an audit and nine out of ten were like no that's a bad idea wait till the audit's concluded and then release the returns yeah

but like at the same time like you're running for president you're gonna have to do some bad ideas he did a pretty uncomfortable thing though though he released his to be fair donald trump doesn't need to do anything because people who like donald trump fucking love donald trump it doesn't matter if he said he was going to give the six million dollars he raised to veterans organizations and only gave $3 million. It's bigger than that. You're absolutely right with what you said, but it's bigger than that. When you look at the voting numbers, look at the voter turnout, especially compared with- Oh, it's huge turnout for a primary.

It's not just that. He's bringing new people. He's bringing new people. Tens of thousands of them. Leave without- Primary has nothing to do with the general election. New people are coming out. I agree. And new people will come out to going to Donald Trump in Nevada. And it was like, I read an article about that, and the entire Republican primary Hispanic vote was like 50 people.

No, that's not true. The number was, it was like 75,000 total voters and something like 12% of that and I think that comes to like 9,700 voters and then he took 40 something percent of that and that came to like 5,700 of the

9,700. This is pretty rough math. Alright. We got different sources for our information. I like Kyle's source more so that's what I believe. Alright, we're getting we got different sources for our information Well, alright So so you all you need to do is look up what percentage of the toe of that vote was this was Hispanic take that Percentage from 75,000 which was the total you seem really into Donald Trump, man? I'm not I'm really into the this political cycle I know a lot about Bernie Sanders, too. I just don't think he's got a chance and he's got he's low energy low energy

No low energy he screams all the time he's like himself talk, that's why he's screaming And you don't think that Donald Trump loves to hear himself talk? Man, I've never seen somebody love to hear themselves talk like Donald Trump. He's an age joke. Yeah, it's funny. I like that age joke. That's what he's saying. That's why he's saying that Bernie speaks loudly because otherwise he wouldn't be able to hear himself.

Oh, I get it. Ah, there we are. But they're all old. Like, I think, how old would Hillary be if she took office? Is it 69? Oh, my God, they are all old. Like, I think, how old would Hillary be if she took office? Is it 69? Oh, my God, they are all old. We are going to have an old president, you guys. I think Hillary is like 69, 68, 69, something like that.

Something like that. Trump would be 70. I don't know if he's 70 now or if he would be when he entered office. I think Hillary and Trump are the same age. And then Bernie would be 74. That's just surprisingly old to me. Well, I think it's really interesting to see what's going to happen tonight. Obviously, you'll have Rubio going, what he said is he's going to go round two on Donald,

just more attacks. I'm sure he'll use Mitt Romney's comments today as fuel for that, but I bet the Donald Trump brain, I wanted to say the Donald Trump team, but I think the team might just be him with a piece of paper, likeem jotting down insults like like like nodding his head with like a do-rag on on Trump force one flying into Detroit. It does seem an awful lot like if Trump had advisors, there are a bunch of things he would not have said. Knees, weak arms, heavy, lightweight. Interesting thing about Trump. So I watched his speech today, the one where he talked about the air conditioners and such.

And he's like, you know, my wife told me to go easy, you know, to act presidential. He says, you know how you talk presidentially at the, on super Tuesday and everyone loved it. She's like, do that. And he's like, but I've got incoming, you know, like a, there's like a war term. And when you got incoming, you fire back.

And he was basically like, you know, yeah, I know my wife wants me to be presidential right now, but that's not going to happen. Yeah, he talks about his son too. It's like, oh, it's just a family business. His campaign. You know, I had never heard the son speak. I'd only seen pictures of him, and I thought he looked

like a real douche, to be honest. And I probably, I still do, if I'm being completely honest. He's got like this blonde, completely slicked back hair, and his bone structure isn't, he looks like a, it's shocking to me that Donald Trump might raise a guy who looks like a douche.

In the Harry Potter universe, he would definitely be a Slytherin, okay? That's all I'm saying. I hear you. And I saw him on stage the other night, and he's trying to, like, edge in next to the Donald. You know, Christie's standing behind him like a fucking pit bull.

What are the odds that Donald Trump announces his running mate and it's his son or his wife? His, like, hot young wife. He's already said he's going to pick a Washington insider who knows how to work. Chris Christie. Oh, well, that wouldn't be Chris Christie. But Chris Christie is an interesting choice because New Jersey's a state that goes Democrat, but it's not so solid that Christie couldn't turn it around. I mean,

heck, Christie's a Republican himself. Jersey goes blue all the time, and while people might think of it, if you're watching this show, as one of the smaller states, if it's not the most densely populated state, it definitely was when I lived there. So it's among America's most densely populated states.

It has more, are they called delegates? Electoral votes than you might guess. What I was getting at about Trump's son, though, is I heard him speak the other day on Fox News. I didn't even know it was him speaking. I was listening to Fox News Radio or something like that. He'd been speaking for maybe three minutes

before Megyn Kelly or whoever the fuck said, well, thank you, blah, blah, Trump. I think he's Donald Trump Jr. Yeah. Thanks for coming on. And I was like, wow. I was really blown away. He's very well spoken, better than his father, which isn't saying much because as we've evaluated before, he speaks at about a sixth grade level with his vocabulary, that is.

Super effective sixth grader. Incredibly effective. Speaks to the common man. There you go. Super effective sixth grader. Incredible. Speaks to the common man. There you go. Super effective sixth grader. His style of speaking is one that I think that I could learn from. It's so fascinating. I was in embarrassing YouTube drama not long ago.

That's always fun. Good old embarrassing YouTube drama. I've been there. So I'm not firing any shots here. There's probably people groaning. drama I've been there so I'm not firing any shots here there's probably people groaning but um what I what I didn't do as well as I could have is like like the sound bite right I'm spending six minutes explaining my side of it and the other side is like I'm gonna make something up like Woody's too tall and and that's it like Woody's too tall god damn it he's stomping on

little people or something like that and uh it was like, man, like, their message is so short, so synced, like, memorable, it works. And that's how Trump does it, too. You know? And when Trump says, I'm not going to be presidential, I've got incoming, I'm going for the, you know, for the cojones. I'm misquoting him. But it's like, man, this guy is effective at battling with these other people. Yeah, I mean, he's a host. He's known how to, yeah, he's a good talker.

And like, it is amazing. And he frames things very simply. And it's very, it can resonate very easily. Like, it's very clear that there's winners and there's losers. And there's big and there's small. And like, there's winners. And like, right now, from Donald trump's perspective america is losing and like that that can resonate really fast really hard the way he talks you don't feel like every single thing he

says has been read over and poured over by like that's because it hasn't because like it's also the case that like at this point because, because of our extremely, like, distributed media system now, it doesn't matter if he says stuff that's just really fucking wrong. Like, he's wrong. He lies. I don't know if he lies. He does. Or if he just is saying things that are, like, clearly untrue, but he doesn't know. He doesn't tell as many lies as Rubio.

Rubio really does. There are a lot of lies. I am, I, it is difficult to quantify lies, but when I watch Donald Trump talk, I am always very surprised by when he just says something and he just says it very

factually, and I'm like, that's not right. And I look it up and it's like, I was right, it's not right. But like, does it matter anymore is the point. Does it you if you say true things anymore when you know when people are reading breitbart over here and they're reading msnbc over here like does it matter because like like if you get your news from fox news and breitbart you're not going to hear about donald trump being like if he's the if he's the nominee, you're not gonna hear about his lies. You're never gonna hear. So YouTube was invented during a fairly recent

presidential race. I forget if it was Obama's first term. It might have been Kerry, the Kerry Bush, like for his reelection. When would YouTube have started? YouTube came out in 2006. In 2006, so that would have- Five, six, but it started to get big

around Obama's first campaign. Okay, okay. So Obama's first term was the term of YouTube impacting debates. And I thought it was going to change the world. I was really excited about this. I was like, we are going to have a fact-based political competition here, an election, because everyone who says the wrong stuff is just gonna get roasted, you know? It'll be so easy.

And if you change your position, there'll be a video uploaded of you of saying the old thing on YouTube. It hasn't worked out that way at all. PolitiFact is there. Donald Trump, I don't know if it's current, but there was a time when PolitiFact, rating the things that Trump said,

he was the biggest liar in the whole race. And now, of course, you know, they don't look at everything they say, but he had the most lies. And yeah, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if PolitiFact tears you apart. It doesn't matter if YouTube videos make you look silly. It's still a likability contest.

It's a likability contest, and it's kind of a who can get who more scared contest. And there's something really scary for people about Trump's rhetoric that's scarier than saying there's billionaires who want to take your money and they control the American political system. But when it comes down to

feeling threatened both by job and my family's safety by external threats that are not that realistic. That is much scarier than thinking that there's some richy rich pants who's gonna get even richer when people are doing all right. I recently had a thought about this whole thing as it pertains to the conspiracy theorist

at large, which I don't think of myself as, although, you know, you can start watching one of those Netflix documentaries and you'll start believing that George Bush is an alien or something like that. Yeah, you don't want to go down those holes. Chiz is big. Chiz is going to watch this. Chiz, baby, you believe anything you see on YouTube. Oh, Chiz and I have had this discussion already. I proposed this to Chiz and I bounced it off of him. I said this because, all right, so just in case you don't know, I proposed this to Chiz and I bounced it off of him.

I said this because, all right, so just in case you don't know, there are people out there who believe that there's sort of a group of overlords who control everything. There's sort of a new world order. And there's a small group of individuals who control the entire globe and everything that goes on in it. I think Kevin Caparulo was one of those guys. He is. Nut job.

Now, if that is, if that is. Not co-signing on that. Ridiculous. If that were true, if that were true, though, then there's no way Trump can come to power. Think about that. Like, there's no way Trump, there's no way you have a Donald Trump coming to power if there is, in fact, like reptilian overlords pulling strings, any of that shit. Unless Dr. Donald Trump is a reptilian overlord.

Ah, fair enough. Dr. Chiz watched a YouTube cartoon about how aliens populated the earth and led the Egyptians and all this crazy stuff. That's more likely than Jesus. When I thought it was ridiculous, he said I needed to be more open-minded.

He was toying with you though, right? He wasn't really falling for that. No, he is really prone to believe in wild theories, especially if they're aged. You know, I'm not saying that he believes Bush is behind 9-11 or anything. But if you tell him that reptilian overlords

stack the pyramids, and this is proof because of the way the rocks slid on each other, he's like, well, I guess I'm in the know now. What else could it be? A series of levers? They could have figured out levers and fulcrums back in Egypt. I love you, Chiz, but you're half crazy.

So another thing that's interesting about this whole Trump thing, and I said it to Chiz. We're still talking about Trump. Yeah, yeah, this is the last Trump topic, I promise. Okay, okay. We're going to dead dogs after this. You'll feel much better. From Trump to dead dogs. It's going to be great. It's going to be huge.

About a week ago, 10 days ago, I texted our friend Chiz, who's kind of the manager of the show and sets all our stuff up for us. I told him, I think that Donald Trump should fear for his life. I think that there is a better than normal chance when it comes to candidates that someone will try to kill Donald Trump because his views are so extreme and he's got so many people on both sides of our political power systems so upset and so angry. Sure enough, I see today there's several Facebook groups and Twitter campaigns who are devoted to the idea or the goal of assassinating Donald Trump.

I got to think for that. Apparently, he's being protected and they're watching out because there was a credible assassination threat from some Russian group. That's as much as I know. He seems to love Russia. I know, right? He's always... Russians fear him. They know the to love russia i know right he's always fear him he they know the walls coming sky walls great i mean how else are you gonna control the media

but by killing them sometimes putin's awesome putin will give you the polonium poke uh you never know he'll put you down he's done it before we We all know it. The guy is ex-KGB. That's what he's all about. Hank, you've got to admit, Putin's a strong leader. Oh, yeah. Accurate, accurate. Yes! It's not the leader you want.

I want your prediction. Who is going to be the next president of the United States? Let's just leave it at that. And just to be honest, who do you think has the best chance? Not who you want. You can tell us who you want. No, I mean, the person who has the best chance to be the next president of the United States is Hillary Clinton.

And that's because of Donald Trump, largely. I think that Donald Trump will get the nomination. I think Hillary will get the nomination. And I think that Hillary will win. And I don't think that... I think Hillary would have had a hard time winning against someone besides Donald Trump, but he is so polarizing. He's going to give a lot

of energy, people voting for someone who isn't Donald Trump, despite the fact that people aren't very excited about Hillary Clinton. But frankly, it's a safe vote. She's done this. She's been there. This is stuff that... So what happens then

if Hillary is a professional politician who has done a lot of this if Hillary is indicted on criminal charges or a more likely at least more likely than that scenario that someone very close to her an aide a staffer someone like that is indicted on some sort of criminal charges

because I mean Donald Trump is right now in the middle of a civil lawsuit can i know about the thing about trump is people forgive him for his flaws right yeah donald trump came out with an autobiography and in it he said if i told you the story and i'm going to paraphrase here of the women i fucked who seemingly were in happy marriages and all the times i cheated on my wife this would be a bestseller right that's that's pretty i'm sure i messed it up a little bit but that's pretty much on target with what he says in this book right and everyone is like well yeah you know the trumpster you know what what i think what i think would would end us in a trump presidency more than an indictment of Hillary Clinton is a major terrorist attack.

I think that if there was a major terrorist attack in America, if a bunch of people popped out in New York City with assault rifles and started shooting people and they were not from America, I think Donald Trump would win the presidency. And I think that that's a pretty scary thing when you're thinking about how, you know, how the president's going to get elected and who, and how one might think Donald Trump would be as a president, which I think would be an international disaster. I think that internationally, people would really, really dislike America, be pretty afraid of us. Oh oh we wouldn't want that Hey, hey, yeah, no you wouldn't want that you wouldn't want people in other countries to dislike America Why why would you want that? Why would you want the the allies that we have in the war against? No, of course not. I was joking saying that they already don't like us like go on any forum

No, no, they do like people talk People talk about how people don't like America, but people want to move to America, people want to come here, people want to live the American dream. There are a lot of places where America has a very good image, and when it doesn't have a good image, it's because, like, 70% of the people dislike us, and 30% of the people like us. We need to talk to those 30% of those people

and figure out how to work together, not because, like, America represents more than America. America represents more than, like, more than like you know you and me it's it's about democracy it's about freedom and it's about how those things lead to better lives for people and if we can prove if we can show that not only through our own like having pretty good lives and like chillin out on the internet having a good time but also helping those people have better lives by letting them control their destiny by helping democracy come to those places, then that's what we want.

And having a leader who basically sees the world as winners and losers and America needs to be the winner and it doesn't matter if every fucking other person is the loser to get there, we don't want that. I don't want that. That's very scary and that's the kind of thing that literally could be decided by 12 terrorists popping out. I don't care what he thinks. I care what people think.

I care how people think about the Trump presidency, how people think about America. If he's talking about it like this, then it's definitely how people are going to perceive it. So, Hank, I mostly agree with you. But I do feel like the fair trade deals we have now aren't that fair. You know, no one's paying for movies outside of some Western countries. Well, I mean,

that's part of what the, that's part of what we're trying to guarantee with our trade deals. I mean, like you see, I'm less worried about, I would rather than I am about intellectual property than I am about China. Like just straight up. If something is published as a patent, that's's basically a like showing china how to do it uh and they don't have any okay so i work for cisco right cisco the company that makes the routers and stuff

and uh this chinese company named it's it starts with an h but i think it's pronounced raw way and um they made our routers and they made copies of our routers entirely. But wait, I want to tell you, they didn't just make similar routers. There'd be mistakes in the circuit boards and they copied those. If Cisco had a router number and the model was like 2940,

they would name theirs like 2940S, right? And so you knew exactly, oh, you want this one? Here's the Rod Broadway copy of it. Their instruction manuals, they just photocopied the Cisco instruction manual. Like they didn't rewrite it or anything. It still had Cisco copyright

by the page number on every page. No, I feel you. But this isn't the stuff that Donald Trump is talking about. No, it is. He's saying- These are things that we need to deal with, but this isn't the rhetoric. I don't see any like legitimate policy coming out of this campaign and nobody thinks there is. I do. So when Trump says, look, we're going to

start tariffing their stuff, we're putting tariffs... Is tariffing a word? Sure. A verb? Yes. Yes. It's a verb. All right. Yeah. We're going to start putting... We're going to terrify their stuff. I like it. Terrify the Chinese. Let me going to start. We're going to terrify their stuff. I like it. No, no. Terrify the Chinese. Let me go. Like in today's speech, he basically said, we're going to put tariffs on their stuff because we're not getting free trade.

When we ship stuff to China, they make us go again and they reject it. And again and again and again, apparently on like safety violations, which is like bullshit. They'll like just make up a thing as a reason to reject U.S. exports. which is like bullshit. They'll just make up a thing as a reason to reject U.S. exports. And then you eventually have to pay some big fine, which is like a tariff, to get your things past the safety violation.

And that's how you do business with China. That's what he's saying. We're not having free trade here. We're having trade where we get screwed on our exports and their imports roll right in. Happy-go-lucky. Not to mention the devaluation of their currency, but that's a whole nother issue

and we've done an hour of political talk. So hey, would you clone your dog? Oh, damn. I didn't see that. No, I don't think I would. No, I don't think I would. I think that's too weird. You ever seen the boys from Brazil? How many could I clone? Here's think I would I think that's too that's too weird you ever seen the boy that I clone here's what I was never

have you ever seen the boys from Brazil where they clone all those hitlers down in Brazil and and put them in households with the exact situation Hitler had and they they kill the fathered on his you know he's like seven or whatever just like Hitler in the try to create a new Hitler I feel like you could do a similar thing with the new dog you know put in through all the things that you know Max number one went through. And so perhaps through that cloning process you could end up with Max 2.0 and he would have the same memories as

Max 1.0, the same experiences. Well you're not just talking about cloning a dog, you're talking about hiring a family to make your dog into your dog. No, I can do this shit. So you're doing this shit. I can do this shit. So are you gonna, let's say that your dog of 12 years dies when you're 23 or something. Yeah.

Are you just gonna act like an 11 year old and just pretend for over a decade for this very mild payoff that this dog is vaguely reminiscent of that other dog I had that died? Taylor, how much of an act- There's no winning in this entire scenario, unless you just clone the dog regularly and then just keep it like a new dog. If anything, it'll be more fun, because then you'll have the same dog look, but you'll be like, oh, you don't shit in the carpet. I remember Max 1 shit on the carpet, Max 2. I did a better job.

Who knows where we'll be, fifth generation. Max 1 shits on the carpet, you don't clone Max. Alright? Max 2 shits on the carpet, Max 3 makes an appearance. I for one am very interested. You're just killing him? You're just trying to reboot him? There's just a bunch of little graves in my backyard. Yeah, HUT UP AGAIN, MAX!

It looks like a Microsoft Excel spreadsheet of just dead small dogs. I'm really into this idea. I linked you guys to a website there where unless I'm being trolled, let me just tell this quick story. So there used to be a website where you could supposedly go and watch a live stream of a miniature giraffe.

And there's no such thing as miniature giraffes, just so we're all clear here and no one embarrasses themselves. They don't exist. But there was this internet thing that suggested that they did, and there was this little promo and they talked about it, and they pimped them as pets for the super rich.

I think there were Comcast commercials with that really rich Russian guy who was just overly extravagant, and one of the things he had was a pet mini giraffe. And so part of that ad campaign was this live stream where you could go and watch the miniature giraffe. And this thing is like two feet tall. Incredibly cute.

And I convinced Wings of Redemption that they were real and that I was buying one and I let him go with it for weeks and weeks. How much did you tell him? What was the market rate? It was extravagant. I blew that. I was like, yeah, it's $8,000. Another $1,500 to get it through customs. It's going to be be six weeks before I get it but I'm getting a motherfucking miniature giraffe he was like that's

fucking awesome that's so good two grand a week training should be done in ten weeks tops like and they talk they speak English ah they're sentient living feeling beings basically a human but it's giraffe shaped. I think I would clone a dog. I think I would definitely do that. I actually talked to Wings just today actually. I'm going up to his house. Next week we're going to do our photographs for the hot sauce and we should have the hot sauce out in like

three weeks I'd say. Yay. I would clone anything I think. Would you have an opportunity just to see if they were like you can clone a machine? Can I have a cloning machine? Is it like a 3D printer I can cook it up in my house? Because then I'm doing all kinds of crazy stuff. You just take a hair or a sperm or a blood droplet

or anything at all, you put it in one end and then it creates a 3D printer. You got a hair and then you're like, oh, and a sperm. There was a sperm here as well. I'll take that too. I wish I could have seen his hand motions where he was like, you just take a hair or a sperm. You're going to need more than one sperm.

So I want to talk to you about this website that you sent to us. I like the sidebar navigation, which starts with Facebook, but then goes on to dog cloning cost. My dog has died. My dog is still alive. Step by step photo gallery about my dog's clone alive. Step by step, photo gallery, about my dogs, clone updates, you are in grief. My story, my story, am I happy? It ends with

am I happy? No, because you're on a dog cloning site. Yeah, you're not happy. You're a professional dog cloner. Yeah, look at this link here. If your pet has died, please click here now before it's too late. It's already too late. Your dog is don't creepily I love the do not place your dog in the freezer warning

Yeah, no good. That's no good for the DNA rate your dog Look I am all for dog dogs a hundred thousand dollars. Oh, but you do put it in the fridge Well, I only need one so I course you put it in the fridge. I have great days. I don't know how I'm going to manage this. Make it a chest fridge. It's the big one that lays on the ground. Well, not to be gruesome, but I think you could just cut off a significant portion of the dog, and that would be it.

That's true. Absolutely accurate. However, I don't think that I would clone my dog. And maybe I'm just not going along with the goof here. But I don't think I would clone my dog because I feel like this is a thing that happens. And I have to deal with it in the normal way. No, no. Why?

Who made that rule? I don't know. Can I ask a second question, a follow-up question? Just to see if you continue down this path of letting things go the way they're supposed to go. If you had a hypothetical fetus on the way, a baby who's about to be born, and there were the option to say, make sure that this child has blue eyes or blonde hair, or that it's six feet tall, or that it's not genetically predisposed to things like

diabetes or say scoliosis. We're having a very new conversation now, but go on. I think it's very similar. It's a bit of genetic engineering, but this is a little more close to home. We're not talking about- Is this called eugenics? Is that what eugenics is? No, no, no.

I believe so. We really didn't care for some of these dogs, and we made sure that they didn't get a chance to procreate. Okay. With guns. That's a little more gerbils than I wanted to go, to be completely honest. I wasn't sure what eugenics was, 100%. No, that's not eugenics.

But, yeah, this is a thing that is going to happen. It's going to happen. And if you want to talk about, like, super frightening China talk, here's my fear. And this is just pure fear, no reality. My fear is that America will say, this is a bad idea. We should not allow rich people to genetically engineer their children to be literally better than poor people that's bad that's a bad thing let's not do that because then we have literally created the race of rich people and the race of just admit they're already better you know it to be

no hang on a minute i just want to get into something because you said that as a goof. But the poor in some ways are underprivileged in ways that are virtually insurmountable. That Josh guy that I always talk about who's down on his luck, I found out that he has the same reading level as Charlie from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. The way he passed his driver's license test at 22 was by literally memorizing it. Like you would pictographs. Yes, there is absolutely systemic disenfranchisement

and all kinds of privilege that people have based on their upbringings. I have had all the good ones. Rich white guy here. It's going well for me. This is environmental retardation.ation this was uh this is when your mother is so shitty that like she doesn't teach you to read and you're 22 years old well there's there's a there's a bunch of stuff that i'm sure went into that uh but my uh my worry

is that uh you go from from this thing where basically we're saying everyone has opportunity we're trying to create equal opportunity. the first generation, it's like, the rich kids are a little bit smarter. To the 20th generation, when it's like, there is a class, a race of slave people that basically

are normal humans. And so what I'm saying is, I think the right thing to do is to say that this is not a thing that should be allowed. You can engineer to prevent disease, but you should not engineer for desirable traits. I'm really glad you pointed out, though, China won't put that rule in and they're going to have a race of smarter people. Is that there would be some other countries where they're like, oh, yeah, we're going

to genetically engineer a race of super soldiers and you can't would be some other countries where they're like, oh yeah, we're going to genetically engineer a race of super soldiers and you can't stop us. We're North Korea. We basically don't even have Coca-Cola. Hang on a minute. North Koreans try to do that. They're going to come up with some like, it's like a fly. They're going to be able to mutate it.

It could be some other country. 50 years and 100 years, everybody can do it. It could be like Norway, right? I don years everybody can do it could be like Norway right? I don't think they're gonna build super soldiers They're just gonna build people that are a little better a little taller a little stronger a little smarter, and they might yeah, right fucking, Norway Just like breeding with each other this fucking handsome bastards reading with each other this fucking handsome bastards so hang on a minute because hank brought up the idea of this future society where that's dominated by the rich super engineered people and there's this lower class of non-engineered people have who here has seen who here has seen the movie

gattaca anybody ever seen gattaca yeah right i love that movie ethan hawk and uma thurman and it's it's really exactly what we just laid out. You know what that movie taught me? Is that that guy had no fucking business doing that. He wasn't healthy enough, and there were like half a dozen super men, for all intents and purposes. You know what it taught me? No. Here's why Ethan Hawke's character deserves

to be the guy on the ship going to space to do whatever the fuck you do up there. He had more intensity, more drive, more gumption than anybody if there's a job describe him as high energy incredibly so so you've got this guy who's uh who's engineered to be perfect and and and he can he can run for 30 minutes without without you know breathing hard but ethan hawke can run for 30 minutes and his body is killing him but he won't

show it i feel like that's better in the end that you've got a guy who'll quit at nothing the guy who doesn't save anything it's definitely not better because what if that was a 50 minute run what if it was an hour run then are you still going to be blown away by his there's no running in space hypothetically if you're spending two billion dollars on a project to send people up to space and you have you just happen to be sitting on a big cluster of supermen that can do everything perfectly, maybe just send them up there. Taylor, what if there's a situation that requires mental fortitude and a toughness attitude? What if you've got to cut your arm off and then keep going?

Right? He's the guy who will cut his arm off. Do that. No, yeah, this is the point of the movie. And this is not really what I'm afraid of, though that is a thing to be afraid of. I'm afraid of like, I mean like 1895 H.G. Wells wrote The Time Machine where he went,

like the character goes into the future and they're like humans have differentiated into two subspecies. There's the Morlocks and there's whatever the- Sleaze stacks. Is that what they are? The Sleaze Dax? What are Sleaze Dax?

Isn't that from like the Land of the Lost? So there's the underground, you got the Morlocks, and those are like the troll people. And then above ground, you have this like Bernie Sanders class of people who are just like, la la la la la,

everything's wonderful. And meanwhile, the Morlocks are coming up and getting them and fucking eating them underground those are the trump supporters very high energy down there very very high energy intense oh man oh man wow uh yeah and and like i don't know it's it's i don't want to not go down this road because there's so much that we're going to get from our ability to manipulate genes of humans and other organisms. Accelerate evolution by a factor of...

But when you say accelerate evolution, what does that mean? Where are we headed in our evolution? There's no clear trajectory that we're going in. We're not headed anywhere with evolution now. We've dominated our everyday environment. We're never going to have to encounter water. We're going to re-accelerate evolution. Currently, as humanity sits right now,

we are de-evolving, and I'll tell you why. I disagree! Let me finish my thought, and you tell me why we're not de-evolving. I have not decided. Convince me. Right now, I feel like right now, look who's had... I feel like right now the more intelligent people,

the people most likely pass on genes of intelligence, which in... Idiocracy. Talking about idiocracy. Yeah, I'm talking about idiocracy. I feel like the stupid people are having a lot of babies. The smart people are having no babies. You see that everywhere. It's just the truth. I feel like the stupid people are

outbreeding the smart people. And the other problem is, this isn't the African prairie. This isn't some sort of fight or die situation. You can be incredibly genetically... What am I looking for? What's the antithesis of superior? Inferior. Inferior. Inferior. You can be extremely genetically inferior and still manage to pass your genes on, not once, not twice, but maybe a half dozen, 20 times in our current state as a species. So I feel like the driving force of evolution isn't present anymore. There is no fight or die. We're not removing the section that needs to be, you know,

the cream is not rising to the top anymore. It's quite the opposite. But I think with genetic manipulation, all of a sudden now those smart, rich people, they're getting some, now they're reproducing and they're making super versions. They're not reproducing. They're not controlling more of the genome.

They're controlling more of the genome. They're controlling more of the power. That's what you're talking about. You're not talking about them breeding a bunch of really powerful, smart sex-like children. That's what he is talking about. Yeah, but they're not...

People still aren't going to want a bunch of kids. They're going to want two real good ones. Currently, one of the problems with deep space travel is the radiation that's just out there in space. Wow, we just changed topics like crazy. The problem with deep space

travel right now, among others, is the radiation. What if we genetically We're talking to Hank Green here, but carry on. What if we genetically engineer a race of human beings and the only difference is they're better at dealing with radiation. Now you could actually have one of those generational-type spaceships

that could go to another star or something like that. I feel like genetic engineering is our future, and it's how the human race is going to evolve. Yeah, I know. I mean, you've seen Replicon. It's coming. I honestly believe it's coming, and I lament it. Because every single technological advance advances the people who have already been advanced. That's always how it happens.

I, a wealthy upper middle class kid, got a computer before anybody in my class. I learned how to code before anybody in my class. I had all of the advantages i was and so i was able to like like every step of the way i've had every advantage and guilty let's not talk about guilt right now because i know that that's going to be a whole conversation uh it does not make me feel guilty it makes me feel privileged. But like, so like, and this continues to happen. This happens all, this is how, like there is upward mobility.

Some people do go from the bottom 20% to the top 20%, but you are much more likely to be in the top 20% if you were born there. And you're much, much more likely to be in the top 1% if you were born there. So the, and it's not just that the money is there. Thanks for getting that. It's also that the access to this stuff always comes to the rich people first.

And so we, I'm probably saying we, had access to the Internet first. And we were able to enjoy the fruits of that first. Whereas a lot of people still in America still don't have access to the internet the way that we do. They might have access to the internet through their phones, but not the sort of rich economic way that we have access to the internet

where we can actually use it to our own personal gain. Now, that is one thing when you're talking about access to information. It's another thing when you're talking about your literal genes. And I honestly, I 100% believe that we are going to go down that road and it's going to be a very bad thing for equality. And I think equality is one of the,

like one of those base human desires is that we want everyone to be equal and it would be really hard. It just seems like it's not fair to say like, all right, so now we have this technology so that everyone in this generation can now be better, have more opportunity by virtue of their very existence than we did. Because they'll be smarter, less likely to get killed off by some bullshit disease early in life. And then someone has to come in and go, no, no, no. No, no, no. I know better than you. And my vision of equality says that we shouldn't do this. Yeah, no, I totally get you.

I get you. You know, like, God grant us a future in which we have the resources to give it to everyone equally, but it seems unlikely. Well, what if it was like everything else? You know, in that it starts at the top, but

15 years into this technology, everyone has access to it. Yeah, just like everything else. In that it starts at the top, but 15 years into this technology, everyone has access to it. Yeah, just like everything is going to start as a premium product. A VCR was $1,000 when they first came out or some bullshit like that. Eventually, it'll kind of trickle down. You'll have some really

attractive rich people for 10, 20 years. And then eventually, even people taking out your garbage, you'll be looking at them. Actually, you won't, because everyone will be gorgeous. I want some genetically engineered pussy. That's going to be the top tier come those times. I feel like that

goes against the guy creed. Guys never really... All pussy is good pussy. We're not dicks about it. Oh, false, false. I'm talking about a super pussy. I'm talking about changing the way that thing looks and operates. If you want a real good pussy, you can order one for $39.95 at fleshlight.com.

Look, I've got a $250 automatic auto blow. Now we know who Hank's sponsored by. Yeah, I've got a $250 auto blow. It's got machinery in there and beads working. You plug that thing into a wall. I don't need your $30 toy, please.. I got a robot that sucks my dick on command It sounds like you're firing up a jackhammer That thing a robot is so generous

I drew a face on the back and put googly eyes on there and I shake it while I'm doing it and like give it Real intense stairs. That's the best. That's the best sponsor we ever had. Those people were great. I lost my fucking, I lost my train of thought though. God damn it. I have a place to go. Auto blow genetically engineered pussy. Genetically engineered pussy.

All right. Let's all be honest here. The vagina is, is a terrible thing. Okay. Like, like there's a part of me. I'm kind of a fan. Wow. Yeah.

Like strong disagree. You're going to have to delve deeper into that. Okay. Let me delve a little bit deeper. I love vagina. It's one of the biggest driving forces in my life, is vagina, getting more vagina. I think that's across the board, yeah.

Okay, okay, thank you. I'm glad we can all agree on that. I just want to lay that out there. As far as my biology works. The vagina as an actual thing is a terrible thing. It's not pretty most of the time. It's not it doesn't smell good I unless you take him out of the chat right now No, I cannot let it happen. Hey, I know that it may that you can't even fathom his point of view

But let's give him a chance Look that thing most of the time is unattractive like it's I mean if you ever really stare at one, you ever really get a good look down there. I think you have a really weird relationship with vaginas. No, no. Everybody, no. Maybe he's just seen some unique... That thing, that thing is a bacteria trap. Without constant supervision, this thing turns to a petri dish that grows fungi and cheese.

Like some sort of rainforest plant. Yes. You have this conversation about... that grows fungi and cheese and some sort of rainforest plant. Yes. Every vagina out there, the most beautiful, pristine vagina that you think is so incredibly perfect, is one day of no maintenance away from being so disgusting you wouldn't put your finger in it. That's not true. Because it's like an Italian guy's hair.

It can look great if it's really clean and put to the side, but one day of neglect and it's just so greasy that you don't even, that people will just stop across the room. You underestimate the things I finger. You go for a hike, there's sweat down there, there's all kinds of moisture and

feminine discharge. The vagina's a scary place. The vast majority of human fucking happened before soap. And I'm going to go ahead and tell you that those people... The vast majority of my fucking happened after soap. Right. But I'm going to say that maybe you're having a different cultural experience than is universal.

And you have opinions of vaginas that are informed by things that are cultural, that are maybe unique to you. And plainliness. I've seen dozens of vaginas. I think you've probably seen thousands. I'm going to guess you've seen thousands.

No, I don't care. He's not counting video vaginas. It's not even a matter of personal experience either. Just look at a picture of a vagina. In pornography, of course, it's the perfect vagina with the perfect lighting. And everything's right. But just an average vagina, I'm telling you, that thing is a reason they call it a gag. I think in real life, I have seen two or three times as much cock as Kyle has vagina.

I have seen two or three times as much cock as Kyle has vagina You've seen so much cock and I've literally seen I don't know 40 or 50 vaginas or something like that You've seen hundreds of guys just two yards of cops just so many years of ice hockey and swimming I've seen a locker rooms. I thought maybe you were a doctor in a former life I was like where you seen all your dicks know a lot I thought maybe you were a doctor in a former life. I was like, where are you seeing all your dicks? He pretends to be one on street corners. Lots of sports.

Lots of sports and they all involved showers or changing or something. He's got eight nephews. Eight? Jesus. Uncle with benefits. I don't know. I think my problem with your vagina argument is that it feels like it is bestowing a lot of shame upon this wonderful, wonderful thing. I think the same thing would be said for pizzas, too. No, maybe.

Could the same thing be said about a mouth? Like, look at my mouth. I'll get real close up here. Look at this weird freaking thing. Yeah, the same thing could be said. Do me a favor. Do me a favor. I want you to take your mouth.

Now I want you to take the brine from a can of tuna, gargle it. I got a fantastic half an Arby's roast beef sandwich in there. And go, and that is a vagina. We think that mouths are pretty, but they are literally, they are fucking weird. You look at a mouth objectively, it's got weird bones sticking out of it. It's got all this. Isn't that also weird when your mouth just starts pouring blood? It's freaking weird.

Lips, chap. And to Kyle's point, if you go a day without maintenance on it, it smells terrible. Yeah. And I'm saying that if you felt the way that you felt about a woman's mouth, that you felt about her vagina, which are very, like, basically the same thing, like, physiologically. Very, very physiologically similar. I know of about three products for keeping your mouth spelling right. There's toothbrush, there's toothpaste, kind of go hand in hand, there's mouthwash, maybe floss if you want to count that.

There are 5,000 fucking products to keep a vagina smelling right, all right? There are ointments, there are sprays, there are douches. It's because it's like a pool, that's pH levels. Are you telling me that you think that the vagina hygiene section at the grocery store is bigger than the oral hygiene section at the grocery store? Because I deeply disagree, but that is not my point. My point is that you, I feel like you're making this thing into like this terrifying thing of otherness. Maybe because maybe because like it's kind of weird and taboo but like it's a

part of the human body. No I think I understand what Kyle's saying in that you understand when you see it that you're supposed to be really attracted to it because of that evolutionary imperative and you are just viscerally attracted to it if you're a straight man. But at the same time just like a straight woman might be attracted to a dick,

you can still take a step back, kind of pull yourself out of perspective. Be like, okay, that is a weird body part. That dick and balls, what the fuck is going on here? This weird pinata thing. Or that pussy. What's in there? It's like, if it's hairy, it's like a gopher hole. Like, who knows?

You know? So there's nothing wrong. There's no shaming saying that some people don't find it attractive I think that Kyle went into it with the joke and ended up getting a little more than he Yeah, I don't know You're vagina defensive over here Yeah, I do

Who has a vagina? I feel like you're like, my vagina is beautiful Do you want to see mine? It's really pretty No, I just think that when you really boil it down, if you take your Do you want to see mine? It's really pretty. The co-author of the vagina monologues over there. No, I just think that when you really boil it down, if you take your sexual libido out of it, if you take what your balls and cock are telling your brain to do,

you would look at a pussy and you would say, I'm not even sticking anything in that. That is not a good thing. It doesn't look good. And there are, of course, beautiful vaginas. I wouldn't say that about I want to do this I want to do this I think if you want to stack rank all the orifices right like your nostrils your mouth your vagina your butthole you know eyeballs I think you're gonna meet your top of the

heap they're pretty to me objectively and especially if you look at them up close and they're really clean something about them is just so self-cleaning that you know you could do nothing for four days like toothbrush on your eyeball that'd be terrible if you did no eyeball maintenance for a week and i came up and licked your eyeball i think i would find it to be as clean as if i just did it randomly right so hot right so you ever so eyeballs i think are right near top, but vaginas are not far from the top either Okay, I think you know I would I think nostrils are yucky than vaginas No, I don't I think I think an unattended nostril like there's some boogers in there

But like if my girlfriend falls asleep in bed I'll totally go over there and be like ah and like pick her whole head up by her nostril as you do Yeah, yeah, I think I think all the orifices are pretty bad, but the butthole, if cleaned properly, I feel like is one of the best, honestly. There's not going to be anything bad happening once it's cleaned and there hasn't been an emergency. When it comes to the amount of maintenance I require

before I lick it, I feel like the butthole is number one. Number one. However, I've never had sex with a woman who had any common sense who didn't before sex be like, I'm going to go to the bathroom. She's going to the bathroom to take a warm wet washcloth and wipe the slime off

her pussy before it gets back to me. Because that's what's happening. You've heard that Amy Schumer joke. We all talked about how she stole it. About how I just like for once when I take my panties off for it to look like I didn't blow my nose in them. Panties are gross. Vaginas are gross. They do stuff during the day.

Maybe some men out there aren't aware of this, but they're always kind of oozing or grueling. Yes, lots of secretions down there. Not just... I want to say this is one of the rare times in pka history that kyle's coming off as gayer than me with all his vagina hate well maybe if we could let's just find a woman out there with a big wide uh a big wide face and strong collarbone wide face just like two days of stubble just two days i have to i have to go in like in like. Can we change topics again? Ellie Button fucking. No, no, no, no.

Stop. He's a respectable man. I don't want to talk about that. Hey. I'll send you some links. I don't know. I had conversations with you in my head before you got here. Yeah, yeah.

I'm glad. Is it going as good as you thought? I really like your videos. I was actually talking to my wife about it. I'm glad. I wish I did that. Is it going as good as you thought? I really like your videos. I was actually talking to my wife about it. You said something. I think it was in a very recent video. We were just looking at your feet the whole time about leaving your mark and how some, like everybody aspires to leave their mark.

And some of them, it's just dirt, right? And I was actually thinking about it in the YouTube sense. Like people can imagine whose mark is just dirt on the wall right and then like I like to think that my mark is silver in that like that you probably haven't seen my body of work but I talk about well shucks lately I've been giving advice on investing and how to break up cleanly and you know toxic friends and so you know like different advice that helps young people get through the social navigation that is this world and you probably don't know my story but in fast forward I as a teenager I had terrible grades and I

tried to kill myself and then throughout life things sort of got better and better and better until I found some you know family and financial success right so so this is sort of a really bad spot to a much better one and I like I think of my videos and I'm like I think I feel like I left a mark to some extent and it's not dirt it's silver and yours is gold and I think that's pretty neat I don't know where I'm going with this topic so much but I don't care where you go with it that was a very sweet thing to say um but yeah i it's it's a weird thing to have happened and i don't like the era of youtuber that we are we didn't know what the hell was going on we didn't know it was happening to us

we didn't understand like it was just it was a bunch of luck we showed up in this place because it seemed interesting we started making stuff because it seemed fun. And then money came and that was just such a wonderful surprise that I started getting checks in the mail. And nowadays, people know that YouTube is a way to make money. And a lot of YouTubers started after that was a thing and like with the intent of getting to that place where you could be somebody who would make a living as a YouTuber and of course that's fine wonderful and I encourage as many people to try and do that as possible because it's a great

career and it's really fun and you don't have to quit your other job to do it but you know like of this era there are so many people who are just deeply grateful that this thing happened to them. And that's such a nice, like, thing to have be sort of a streak in the community. Where when I talk to people who started making content, like, before 2010, there's just this, like, universality of gratefulness.

And very little entitlement about it. universality of gratefulness and very little entitlement about it. There has been more of that and occasionally I feel it myself being like, this is how it is now and with Facebook freebooting content and not paying anybody and not doing anything to try and protect

creators' copyright. There's a bit of entitlement there where if that that had happened in 2007 i wouldn't have given a shit because i wasn't making any money anywhere i was just wanting people to watch my content it might have been exciting to see your stuff rebooted back and right back in the day i it's it's pretty awesome when like i'm a capitalism or capitalist uh i'm a capitalism it's pretty awesome when you can find this cross section and sit at like doing good for other people and doing good for yourself at the same time and uh you know like i think of um heck the whole crash course channel does that right like i it i'm sure it wasn't completely lost on you guys when you launched it that, hey, this might have a pretty good long tail.

A good deed doesn't become bad because it helps you. And shucks. I don't know. I just think it'd be pretty neat if more people entered that space with that in their mind. Like, you know what? Like, I can make a math tutoring channel or I could do this or you know like you break things down sometimes I feel like a kind of a dick think like talking about it because like of course I had it super easy not only was I able to like pull off

YouTube pretty effectively early on because I had money in the bank but I was I was also had like experience in business i had experience in content creation and uh i started in 2007 when there was not a lot to distract other people from what i was doing there was a lot of attention and not a lot of content nowadays it's very hard and so i can say like look why can't you just try to make something that's good and that people will watch and that isn't awful for the world but how are you going to get noticed i don't think you give yourself enough credit you're like oh it was easy back in my day i just worked at it full-time for years without any payment slaving away for the joy of my craft and then you know

piece of cake i don't know why you know everyone else doesn't do it i sometimes feel bad when i when i like the thoughts that i have about some creators that are making stuff, then I can, like, see the tricks they're using to get views. And I feel like those tricks are a little underhanded. I'm not saying that they're making, like, shitty prank videos where they're molesting people in public. I'm saying, like, people who are just, like, you know, their titles are a little misleading or their thumbnails are real good, but, you know, real good in that way that's not quite accurate. And, like, it's easy for me to criticize somebody there from a place where, you know real good in that way that's not quite accurate and uh and like it's easy for me

to criticize somebody there from a place where you know i have three channels that have more than three million subscribers so like fuck like i've got it i've got i've got lots of ways to get attention right now i've gotten and like what a wonderful place to be in uh no one has ever no one has ever had more opportunity to be uh for for people to to look at them than i have like people look at me a lot they say lots of nice things about me so it's it's a one like it's very easy for me not to be like a you know to not to like you don't have to lower your morality standards because you're winning yes you know if someone came to you in good sound bite you did it kyle does that for me a lot yeah um yeah what's the business model behind vidcon

uh tickets and and advertising tickets and sponsorship sales about 50 50 those two things that's pretty neat i went went to VidCon once. I was on a panel. It was a really neat experience. Go check out VidCon, people. Is this podcast brought to you by... No, it's not. It is not.

I don't want to step on your other sponsors. But yeah, VidCon, it costs money to go to VidCon. We sell a lot of sponsorships and in recent years the sponsorships have become a bigger deal because now like people sort of like companies understand that we exist that we're legitimate and so we are able to keep ticket prices down by selling YouTube and Kia and all kinds of cool peoplehips, so that they can show off their wares. We only have eight minutes of you left. Okay.

And we've been debating among ourselves, fair use. That's what I'm talking about. Ah, fair use. Why didn't we start with that? Why did we talk about Trump for so long? I know. Now I'm regretting it. But I have a contrarian opinion of fair use.

I feel like everybody that talks about fair use has a personal stake in it that most of the people saying hey parody is fair use bullshit right there's a certain parody is fair use but not the way that we talk about parody on youtube a lot of the time yeah if you take a whole song and do like the weird al thing weird al gets permission from the people he parodies always always um if you do like the mystery science 3000 thing right where we're watching that video will probably make you not watch the movie right it like directly removes views from that other thing if i were to just say react to an FPS Russia video and show it on my screen as I reacted the whole time,

no one's gonna be like, oh, you know what? I should go watch that video without Woody now. No, I showed it to you. I stole his view. There's a lot of fair, and by the way, if you monetize your content, it really hurts your fair use argument. and all the people who are proponents of fair use are monetizing their content and a lot of times they're i want a more graceful way

of saying it but they are shitting all over the content that they're getting pieces of you know there's it seems like there are a lot of movie related channels circling around just dogging on that movie like everything that's wrong with it in 20 minutes or less i love those i watch those instead of watching the movie yeah oh you watch those instead of watching the movie which yeah it's a problem that is the definition of something that wouldn't qualify as fair use i was reading up on fair use today if if this if watching this thing this body of work would make you not watch the movie it you know steals from that then it doesn't it's just not fair use and yeah yeah there's a i mean there's a few there's a few problems with this this is a problem on youtube and it's a legitimate problem um there there and there there's like several layers of issues the the top layer which

i think is the legitimate thing is that fair use is not something that you can like you can be sure of the person who decides whether something is fair use is a judge in a court so you're not and nobody wants to go there nobody no the content creator youtube or the rights owner none of those people want to get to the judge so there so youtube has a system and the system is because of the way that youtube started with a lot of illegal content being on it. The system is heavily slanted in favor of the rights holder. And that rights holder might be Viacom and it might be me. I also

can claim videos. If somebody uploads a SciShow in its entirety and tries to monetize that content, I can claim it and monetize it myself or I can take it down. I can give them a copyright strike if I want to so

like but the fact that it's so heavily in favor of the rights holder of me as the rights holder rather than me as the creator is has now it's coming to the fore because

there are many more legitimate users of the platform who are doing this as a business who and who like when this gets taken away from them it is monetary damages and there are lots of times because it is so heavily slanted in favor of the rights holder that a rights holder will just do it because there's no reason not to so they just do blanket claims because it's much easier to do than have someone actually like go one by one and check um and and you know like nostalgia critic absolutely like i that's fair use i think a judge would say that that's fair use and uh and and like every film every every uh every frame

of painting totally fair use like and i don't think every frame of painting has too many problems with this i'm sure that they do they have some. But there's fair use content out there and it is hard to police it because there's so much content in the world right now. And YouTube has this really blanket brute force system for controlling copyright infringement.

And it does not really have built into it a system to protect people who are actually using content fairly using copyright material fairly and it's and you can monetize like fair use content like you can it's totally okay it's the thing that you can do it does hurt your like it does hurt your claim like it's it's sort of a strike against it if one strike doesn't make you out but it is a strike against and people tend not to mention that and by the way everything i said by the way is accurate i i didn't say anything that was wrong in my stuff so but um uh but yeah it's like it's a real problem and so long as i'm making fun of this thing then it's totally that's fair use uh you know i'm so what I'm dogging on your movie,

that's my first amendment, right? And I feel like no one has ever come at it from the side of the content creator. You know, the typical YouTube video in comparison to the content that they're getting is really low effort. You know, I'm just, I'm just taking your song and writing my own words to it. I'm taking your movie and making fun of it. And you know, I should be able to make my money. And it's like, there is an argument for the content creator on that side.

By the way, PKA, we've always been really lenient. We don't like people uploading the show in its entirety, but if someone sees it as a highlight and they want to put four minutes on, we've always considered that like free advertising or make a montage, you know, a best of. Oh, that's freaking awesome.

Like that's always definitely. Yeah, we have a really good fan base. Oh, that's freaking sweet. Yeah, they'll take a funny story and animate it and stuff. The animated stuff is the best. Yeah, we get a lot of Crash Course videos that like YouTube will tell it like claim a video. We don't actually have auto claims on anymore, but we used to.

And it would be like a teacher in a classroom talking about content and then they would show a little bit of our video and then they would continue their lecture. And I'm like, oh, fuck that. That's great. Like I can't take that person's content. Like, yeah, I'm like Crash Course

has a broader mission too. Like advertising isn't the only way that we support that show. So, you know, getting it out there is good for that program. So, yeah, I mean, like that's the thing that like it's we're now in a world where like and I guess this was always kind of the case. The law isn't really the thing that matters. It's how different companies and individuals have worked together to sort of make this thing work because the law wasn't designed for youtube it wasn't designed for this weird world where you know

there's 8 000 hours of content uploaded every second to the platform like there's just too much stuff for the way that the system worked uh so now you have to have it cobbled together in this weird way that's more corporate than government and i fully agree for creators i like the way that you put it when you said that it is too much in favor of the content creator now right like i like you in favor of the rights holder the rights holder yeah that's better um because i guess they're both content creators but yeah um i could claim something inappropriatelyately and then they would have to actually win that claim to turn that around. It shouldn't be so automated.

I feel like there should be some human level of judgment in there. You can't do this with an algorithm purely. But at the same time, you can't do it with humans because if you're Lady Gaga and you're like, okay, I'm going to watch every video that has a poker face in it, you've got to have an army of humans watching those videos

because it's probably a Poker Face video uploaded every five seconds on YouTube, and that song's old. Yeah, I don't know the best way to do this. It's a tough one to solve. I mean, that's what I always run into when I watch these videos. I'm like, yeah, this is a problem. And then they suggest solutions, and I'm like, that's not I always run into when I watch these videos. I'm like, yeah, this is a problem. And then they suggest solutions, and I'm like,

that's not a good solution. But I think that there are little things, like the fact that you can't dispute more than three claims at a time. That doesn't make any sense. The other thing is, like, if a channel is in good standing, if it's proven over and over again that they are

a legitimate critique show, if it's Nostalgia Critic show if it's if it's nostalgia critic if it's every frame of painting like these are clearly fair use shows there should be some system where youtube has a little firewall in place and is like look before you claim this actually look at it so that like there can be some that exists doesn't it i don't you're a managed partner i have that protection you have that and that's but like is that the kind of production you get when you're with an mcn uh yeah but they typically don't blanket give it to every channel like if you're with full screen they all whatever 3 000 channels under it won't but maybe 100 of

them do right okay yeah well i mean then but like you shouldn't have to give away 30 of your revenue to get that to get that to get that power to an MCN. YouTube should be able to identify that there are channels that get hundreds of thousands or millions of views a day. And that they shouldn't just let Sony claim their video because they had an intern click a button. You're right. And it's not 30%. But that's exactly why I give away a percent of my revenue. Mostly because that protection

is the one that's most important to me. And if a claim does come through, then it's difficult for me to talk to Google, but MCNs have hotlines they can pick up and that's what they're for. What's that? They do not have that. The MCNs do.

Sorry, the MCNs do. But YouTube does not have that for the mcn's do sorry the mcn's do but like youtube does not have that for the average person um i get that i can call somebody i don't have i can call somebody but i can email somebody and it's lovely and i uh and like and and it's because you're white it's your privilege it's my privilege uh it certainly is a privilege um but it is uh yeah i mean and you said in the beginning uh you're talking about how this is this is a problem always brought up by creators who are using other rights holders content in their content but of course it is because like i'm not going to bring it up because I don't ever have the chance to do that.

But if we did a Crash Course film history, which we're thinking about, then suddenly we would have that problem because we would want to use clips from copyrighted material in that movie. My issue is that I feel like the people educating the world about fair use aren't doing it.

Don't really understand it. Well, I don't know if they don't understand it as much as I think that in many cases they are purposely misleading. in the world about fair use aren't doing. Don't really understand it. Well, I don't know if they don't understand it as much as I think that in many cases, they are purposely misleading. If you watch your typical where's the fair use hashtag video, then they're like, dude, fair use is anything I want it to be. Tweet this out and understand it.

And they have some legitimate claims, right? Companies striking things. I've had, not strikes, understand it. And they have some legitimate claims, right? Companies striking things. I've had, not strikes, but what's the claims on stuff that were just completely, like one was on a graphic we made. I did this like March Madness thing. And we literally in Photoshop like made a graphic and it was ours. But it was meant to kind of look like an ESPN thing, but it was different. And Twitch gave me a claim over it. And it was like, what the heck?

Like it was an automated thing, whatever. I've had bad claims, but people are being improperly educated on what fair use is. Yeah, there's a certain amount of it. And I mean, I don't want to like disparage anybody, but there's some of it that's like, this is like, I'm having a bad day and this is an issue and there's some of it that's like I'm going to get a bunch of views if I rant about YouTube right now and

there's a lot more than just fair use that's at play here there's also things like community guideline things that can be interpreted widely and often have more to do with how many people click to report your video than what's actually in your video and that might not be due to what's in your video but it might be

more to do with that there's a group of people who don't like you out there and they're trying to give you a bad day i used to have a series where we put things in microwaves and checked out what it did you know things like spray paint or glow sticks or whatever and um then the guys on 4chan would organize copy like community guideline strikes against me and i would send in like screenshots of the threads where they all agreed to do it and talked about my daughter and stuff like that and uh in some cases i still didn't get it overturned you know they're age restricted and you know it's like age restricted like I'm not the first guy to put a thing in

a microwave but I by far had more trouble with it than anybody else yeah age restrictions also a very weird thing we have a sex channel where people like we have a host who talks about you know various like just real-life sex stuff and it's ridiculous what gets claimed and what doesn't. There's videos that are like this is how to give a great blowjob. Doesn't get age restricted. Then you have a video that's like masturbation

is healthy. It's like age restriction! Hmm. Super weird. She's like going to town on this banana, but no big worry about it. Anyway,

on that note, I have to go. What a fun time. Thank you so much for coming on. You're a very high energy guest. We appreciate that. Very high energy. Alright. Got to get that high energy in there.

Thank you guys so much. Thanks, everybody, for watching. And don't forget to click on those sponsor links because that's important to PKA. You've got to check out those MeUndies. They're super comfy. And where should they find you? Vlogbrothers channel?

Is that where you'd find them? Yeah, you can check me out on YouTube.com slash Vlogbrothers. I also have a podcast if you're into that kind of thing. It's called Dear Hank and John where we give advice it's dubious but it is advice that's a great tagline thank you see you later

I like him a lot I think my man crush showed through a bit I liked trolling him with all the Trump talk that was fun that was pretty fun push it a little further and then a little further and then... I was about to start saying

something about keeping the brownies out or something like that. I've got the Fox News debate playing silently in a corner of my screen. Can I just say, Megyn Kelly is looking super hot tonight. Oh, what a change of pace. She's got a

new haircut, so it's pretty short and her uh her makeup is like uh is excellent short very tan very very uh very hot tonight she's really pretty i like her a lot actually i i i could be wrong because i kind of got the fox hosts mixed up earlier in her career but i feel like she almost played a bimbo at first and that has changed and now she's she's just fantastic uh she's very well educated she goes toe-to-toe with anybody and uh i think it's pretty great yeah yeah i like her a lot too uh just super fucking hot yeah i like the short hair too well uh, our guest mentioned MeUndies. You wear underwear every day.

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shower since the morning. But I did wear them today, yeah. They seriously are good underwear. Like, all jokes aside, they are top-notch underwear, and they're 20% off if you use the PK URL. So if you need underwear, you should click on that and check it out. When I open my underwear drawer, I look for one of my two, one of my two, unfortunately, pairs of MeUndies,

and I'm always happy if I can find one of them. Always. Isn't that great? You know how you have that small little group of your favorite socks and your favorite underwear and your favorite T-shirts, and when you can get all those lined up on the same day, you just feel good walking around. Yeah, it's picture day, baby.

Picture day. Time to shine. I got a new driver's license recently and I realized this is picture day for adults. It came out terribly. Terribly. Oh my god, my most recent license pick, I had to get one

like four or five months ago, I guess, and I just look like I just finished dumping a couple of bodies in a river I look so creepy and like the light is cast down on me in the wrong way so I've got like bags and just look sketchy and awful but that's

what happens when you sit in the DMV for a while you could be just so chipper and peppy when you walk in but 40 minutes later when you have to talk to that obese elderly woman who can't fucking fathom that you need this sent somewhere different, but that you're still moving addresses. So if you can put that address on there, that'd be great,

but this one to ship the fucking license to, things like that. Just, I don't know. Dude, so I got a new driver's license and a new concealed carry weapons permit last year, and both times I got really good pictures I felt like you know I don't know fix my hair and you know shaved to the level that I thought that looked best and the driver's license I replaced I looked pretty good I felt like every time I laid it down it was like my headshot for modeling it was an old picture though right yeah I mean it was still me

but it was like the best version of me and no it wasn't that like 25 year old you or something wasn't it no because I got it when I changed addresses ah that's right so so it looked good and it was like god this is me and um this time my hair was too long and it wasn't a good hair day and uh i tried to go get a haircut right before my driver's license but there were like six people there and i wasn't going to make it it was my birthday, the day it expires, so there was no alternative but to abandon plan A, which was haircut first, and go straight to the DMV. What are you gonna do, drive illegally? Who would do such a thing?

And so. I mean, where are you going? I go to the DMV and, yeah, right? And it takes time, they suck the life out of you, et cetera. I eventually get there. She takes the picture like I don't even realize it's happening really she's like look over

this way we're going to take your picture the warm up no countdown no nothing I get my shitty picture and I look at it and I'm like oh this is bad and she's like well I've only got so much to work with you cut you cut you just called me ugly yeah yeah and

she was able to say that because they don't get fired there they can do whatever the fuck they want they i'm in the exact same boat as you where my my the lighting at the idaho dmv i was in when i got that license i looked just incredible just great like i would have rather like if i met someone for the first time i would have rather like if i met someone for the first time i would have rather be like pay no attention like just look at here like look at this license and then now i look like someone who has to check in with my neighbors when i move in on my missouri one bullshit lighting there in the carry one when i had it like 10 years ago uh they would take it and ask you if it was okay and And you could take a fresh one.

You know, if it's like, huh, I had a weird smile on that one. Let's give it one more shot. You know, chin forward, get that jawline cooking. Like you could give a second try. In this one, she hardly alerted me, so. What a whore. Yeah, well it's okay, it's only a decade. In a decade I'll have a whole new picture at 53.

I'll get a new one in 2026. I'm sure I'll look better at 53 than I do at this one. Yeah. I mean, you could always go get another one and just tell them you lost the first one or whatever. You could probably go in there and just tell them you want a second or a copy. I'm sure they'd do that, right? Yeah, it's not an issue of it not being possible.

It's an issue of if I want to resolve this, I have to go to the DMV again. And then you think, like, are you going to walk in there when you don't have to be there? Like, no, I'll just look like a molester. And what kind of person would do that? And I had to show my license a bunch recently because Colin got hurt. A lot of people know this story probably. See my channel. Colin hurt his foot with an axe.

And there's all kinds of like you know photo ID insurance and stuff to everybody I meet and yeah so been just handing out that driver's license to everybody yeah as you can see this is not representative there you go it should come with a disclaimer a little post it over the picture they're like more handsome than may appear this other guy ran in right as the picture they're like more handsome than it may appear this other guy ran in right as the picture was getting taken i was in a hurry though couldn't couldn't do anything about it lady said just make it work so the oscars went down and leonardo dicaprio finally got the big one um i saw a really cute video it was so in case you

don't know when you get your oscar your name's not on it because that would kind of spoil the whole thing, right? If there was an Oscar floating around backstage that said Leonardo DiCaprio, it would get leaked somehow. So they engraved them after they give them to the actors. They go down to some lobby somewhere and there's some, you know, I'm sure they're incredibly talented because I watched them doing it

and she was, I thought it would be like ehhh, like being really careful it was like like she was going to town on that thing but he asks her he's like are you here you do this every year she's like yeah yeah i do he's like i wouldn't know it was cute and then unfortunately uh after a night of of many drinks apparently he forgot his Oscar at the bar. They had to run out to his limo and be like, he forgot this. That's funny.

He forgot his Oscar? He forgot his Oscar. I'm sure they would have made him a new one, right? I don't know. I don't think so. I know that Michael Jackson, what was the whole thing where he had purchased, he owned someone's Oscar, I think.

I think he had purchased one. And now it's missing from his estate. I was reading about that the other day. And apparently, I guess... In God's name, would you buy someone else's Oscar? It was a famous person's Oscar. I don't recall the story. A famous person won an Oscar?

Well, there are some very non-famous people This isn't Joe Sixpack's Oscar. This is a very elite Oscar. Kyle's right, though. There's short documentary years. If you had Marlon Brando's Oscar that he sent that Indian woman to receive that Oscar's worth a lot of money but if you've got like

what was that really fat black girl who won an Oscar like four years ago? Precious her Oscar ain't worth shit I would not pay it's worth what it's weight is and whatever it's made if it's worth what its weight is and whatever it's made of. If it's worth an $80 scrap metal, that's what it's worth.

I wouldn't want Precious's Oscar. Do you think they gave her a poor quality one? No, it's the same quality. It's just meaningless because it's hers. But wouldn't it be neat to have a real Oscar in Taylor's background? Of course it would, I suppose. But I'd rather have Leo's Golden Globe than Precious's Oscar, though. Absolutely.

I don't want anything that those sweaty hands have just rubbed over. Can you imagine that moist handprint, you know? Like when you're really sweaty and you put your hand down on one of those science desks where it's kind of black and plastic. I bet that's what it looks like on her trophies. Is there like a sex scene in it or something? I don't know. I wouldn't watch that. No, I'm not watching a looks like on her trophies. Is there like a sex scene in it or something? I don't know. I wouldn't watch that.

Yeah. No, I'm not watching a sex scene with her in it. Here's all I know. In Speech and Debate, one of the people does a scene from Precious in their speech competition. And apparently it's like pretty much R or X rated. And every time like parents judge and see this for the first time, it's like pretty much r or x rated and uh every time like parents judge and see this for the first time it's like holy smokes uh because i i don't know if they're like me they still think of their kid as like 11 and so much as using a bad word is a big deal well i

um i didn't watch any of the oscars and i'm glad i didn't um Reddit was furious with Chris Rock's performance, I guess. What did he do? Well, of course, it was the white Oscars that was boycotted by Will Smith and his wife. Oh my goodness, no Will Smith. Yeah, yeah. And Spike Lee maybe and a couple other people.

And Chris Rock really made fun of that the entire night. And then Sasha Baron Conan came out as Ali G. He wasn't supposed to. He was supposed to come out as Sasha Baron-Conan. But instead, he came out as Ali G. And started making some racist remark about Asian people. About those little yellow hard-working people or something like that.

And he's like, oh no, I'm talking about the minions oh i did see that yeah yeah so apparently his new film and i'm sorry i can't think of the name of it um but it's absolutely outrageous and in one at one point in the scene donald trump gets aids that's part of sasha baron conan's new movie it's being made by sony who if you remember like last year had that huge debacle with Kim Jong-un and the fact that they made the movie about him and there was the whole thing with North Korea and the hacking and everything, and that cost them God knows how much money. That Sony hack was very detrimental to Sony's bottom line. It's kind of incalculable, but it's damaged the brand. So Sony feels like

here we go round two, there's nobody more litigious than Donald Trump. Donald Trump will sue your ass if he thinks he can win. And what was he just talking about out there was wanting to open up the libel laws so when people defame you, they tell lies about you, you can go after them and as he says, win lots of money. And so here Sony goes, about to make a movie where Donald Trump gets AIDS. So we're going to have to see how that plays out. I think that's pretty interesting.

I'm kind of curious about Sasha's new movie. Apparently it's just really... That's not unsurprising for him. Do you remember Bruno bruno was horrific borat for the time was crazy for the time i watched borat just the other day i mean when they're nude that him and that fat man in that bed and they are like getting in they're like wrestling and fighting angrily but they're doing it while transitioning basically from sexual

position to sexual position they They like 69 and fight. And then it's like downward facing dog and fight. And it's like wheelbarrow and fight. Like they're just getting into sexual positions with, and he's got this gigantic, hairy, nasty Bush and his balls are everywhere. It's,

it's, that's edgy for any time. I mean, that's Bordeaux. Yeah. And I guess they run through that whole hotel lobby, right? While they're naked chasing each other. Yeah. Yeah. That's the, yeah. They, and like, that's Bordeaux. Yeah, and I guess they run through that whole hotel lobby, right? While they're naked chasing each other.

Yeah, yeah, that's the, yeah. And, like, that was pretty crazy. He got sued several times behind that movie. That was crazy for the time. I was a big fan of that when it came out. I was, like, 19 or 20, I think. Yeah, I remember. I went to go see that with my dad.

And I thought it was going to be uncomfortable, but it was one of those like oh my dad's actually a pretty cool guy kind of moment where it was like oh that's cool you know yeah there's always like that fear that first i'm sure woody's experienced this from the other side of like because i was like i guess hope sage if i was watching a really explicit movie with my parents i would be sitting there like oh my god like this sex scene i scene. I'll just pick a corner of the screen and just look, or I'll play with my phone. I don't want to even acknowledge that I'm in the room watching it.

What's the parent thinking? Let me ask you, were your parents ever so unchill that they say something awkward when something happens? Because I remember one time, I'm watching Pulp Fiction, and it's the part where Jules and the other guy sam jackson and john travolta walking down the hallway they're about to break up the breakfast and you know uh do the whole opening scene thing and uh they're talking about rubbing a woman's foot versus eating her pussy and and he starts talking about eating the pussy in the holiest of holes and i just remember my

mom being like good lord ah and me just being like can you just fucking go with it i mean we're about to watch somebody get raped in like half an hour like it's not that edgy here uh and i what was the other one when it happened and somebody was just super unchill about it unchill as far as like oh my grandmother making a big scene or that they didn't get it both actually my mom just My mom just didn't get it when it came to Pulp Fiction, and she was just disgusted by that they were talking about eating pussy like that. But my grandmother, I watched Alien Resurrection with her, and I guess I was like 11 or 12 when that shit came out. And there's a scene in it where Sigourney Weaver has sex with an alien,

and it's really heavily implied, but there's kind of this embrace between them, and you kind of get like a montage of just fuzzy stuff, and then an alien offspring is produced by this. And I just remember my grandma didn't get it, and she just didn't get it, and we're just leaving the theater in the car, and she's just going on and on about it,

and I'm just sitting over there like red faced like I want to be like she fucked the alien she fucked the alien that's what happened and finally she was like did they have sex and I just remember my papa going yes yes and me both of us at the same time and then just everybody

being red faced the whole way home cause now we're all like aware of the fact that sigourney weaver had some sort of weird lesbian sex with a creature and produced this humanoid alien ghoul thing i may have mentioned this before but it was years ago when my parents were still together i was in like early high school and my parents and me and my younger brother, we were out to eat and my younger brother and my dad made some joke together, making fun of my mom as was oft to occur. And my dad kind of just held up as like this for a fist bump with my,

my brother just kind of being like, aha, we showed that, that dumb lady who is your mom and my wife and held his fist up. And my brother just didn't acknowledge it or anything. Didn't, didn't want to give him the fist bump, kind of given the rolling eyes of a kid who would want to be associated with his parent. And my mom was just looking at my brother like,

why are you being so rude? Put up your hand and fist your father. Fist your father? Why are you laughing, Taylor? You think it's okay for your brother not to fist your father right now in this restaurant? That's great. You're laughing about this joke. No, it was so uncomfortable.

But I love it when... Your mom was kind of right, though. That's pretty lame of your brother. Well, yeah. It's not that much to ask. Throw people high fives. Throw them the fist bump. Yeah, yeah.

That's a real shit move to leave people hanging. There's never been a time in my daughter's life when I couldn't get a fist pound out of her. And God, will people misconstrue even that? A bump. And then Colin right now, we do a whole handshake. There's never been a time in my daughter's life where I couldn't get a good fist pound with her. And Colin, we have a whole handshake.

Back, forth, up, down, pound. It's a thing. So, have either of you watched the newest episode of It's Always Sunny? No, it's become my ritual that I watch it right after these. I gotta say, I know Woody's been critical. What was the plot line on this one?

They're on a cruise ship. I'll just leave it at that. I don't think I've seen it. All right. So it's the first half of a two-parter. It was so good. I recommend that you skip this week and get the full experience next week and just watch them back-to-back because now I've got –

Is it a two-part? Two-part. And it is very, very good. All the characters are up to their regular hijinks and kind of playing their regular role, but with new gags and new jokes and new ancillary characters. Very good. I liked it a lot.

You got to see Dennis really go into his role as a predator. You got to see Dee really fulfill her role as the bird and as just a rage-filled person. I don't want to spoil it at all, but Mac goes and does a ridiculous thing, a very, very outrageous thing that's kind of game-changing, and Mac goes off and does some awful things. Does he finally come out as gay? That's what I'm thinking.

It's going to be related to that. It was great when he was like, listen, listen, I'm going to go to the Rainbow, the gay bar, right, just to look for a pot of gold alone, okay? I'm alone. I'm alone. Why do you have to be alone? Nope. That's the plan.

I need to go to the gay bar. They'll be upstairs at the bar. And I'll be there alone. Yeah, that was good. Of course, they're at sea, so there's a bit of talk of the implication. I thought this was i this season started out really poorly um that that that that episode that was a clip show was very poor i thought and uh um the the episode after charlie mcdennis um i can't even recall what it was oh no excuse me the skiing

episode was just absolute shit one of the worst they've ever made but the other definitely they've definitely made six excellent the other... They've definitely made six excellent shows this season. I feel like the last three have been very good. I like the leprechaun stuff. I like that Charlie's dancing around like it's Reservoir Dogs. Stuck in the middle with you.

He's like, gonna find out if you bleed green. It was very good. I'm just picturing Mr. Blonde doing all that stuff and how dark that was, and Charlie almost lives up to that. I like how he was humming the song, but he was not singing the words to the song, like just doing like the...

Because he's fucked on pain. Because he doesn't know the words to the song, and he can't read, so he's just humming. But yeah, newest episode, excellent. I'm so psyched for the second part of it and that's going to wrap the whole season. I think this was a good season. It's one of their better seasons.

And I think that's extremely impressive because it's the 11th season or whatever. There were some bad episodes. There were more bad episodes than i remember from any previous season i disagree combined just in a single season i don't remember any other season that there were three maybe four episodes that i thought were awful the only ones i thought were awful i hated the clip show i really did and i really hated the episode the rest of them have been good enough for me i really like liked the court episode. That was great.

I recently watched a fan theory video that goes into what the Nightman Cometh is all about. Apparently, it's about Charlie being molested by his uncle. He really lays out the case that it is because there's this lyric. This show is not up to PKA standards.

That's my thing about it. We talk about Game of Thrones. We talk about Breaking Bad. We talk about A-list shows. We talked about Walking Dead while it was there and then dropped it when it fell. We might talk about House of Cards when it comes out for a little bit.

For sure, yeah. But we never talked about Everybody Loves Raymond. And we never talked about Tool Time with Tim Allen. We would have. Those were both blockbuster gigantic shows for their time. I don't think so. Those in particular were massive. They were, but they weren't great. I liked Tool Time.

I feel like Tool Time is on the level of Always Sunny in Philadelphia. You're so wrong. Tool Time is way lower than Always Sunny. I'll talk about Tool Time right now. Maybe this isn't going the way I thought it would. I'm kidding. The show

wasn't that great. I think a lot of It's Always Sunny. I think it's on the same level as a show like Archer for me. Archer is really high up there. That's an apt comparison. It's on the same level as Archer, South Park, and I know these are all animated, but don't make the point.

Workaholics. Have there been new Archers? New season coming. It's Archer. I think he's a private eye or something this time around. Right, right. I was hoping I was behind, and you're like, yeah, there's actually four episodes you haven't seen.

Fortunately, no. I was hoping that, and I checked last night and nope. So I bought the Stars app package. I don't know how much it is, six bucks a month or something, maybe more. But it comes with a lot of movies that you would have to purchase otherwise. So I like that. And there's a few Stars original TV shows that I'm trying to get into. One of them is Ash vs. Evil Dead.

If you're into the Evil Dead series of movies at all that Sam Raimi made, then you might be interested in that. But it's Bruce Campbell coming back, and he makes fun of the fact that he's 30 years too old, 30 pounds overweight. The first scene is him putting on a girdle, this old medieval girdle to suck his gut in, and and it's you know it's back to basics and he's fighting what sure are we talking about ash versus Evil Dead it's I've never heard of it

either have you ever seen the Evil Dead movie yes not even sure okay he's in a cabin fighting deadites in the first two and then the third one he goes back in time with his with his Oldsmobile and he's fighting the deadites he's got the boomstick on his back he's got a chainsaw arm i know of it yeah i'm pretty sure i've seen maybe the first one or the one where he goes back in time it's a lot it's old yeah 30 years 30 years old so they made a tv show and it's like they're like 30 minute episodes and there's like 10 of them and it's it's really light-hearted but full of some of the most ridiculous gore i've ever seen he'll literally like stick his chainsaw arm in

the guts of a bad guy and it's cutting the bad guy and squirting the blood out the back onto the bad guy's uh children um you know cutting heads off with the chainsaw lots of lots of gore i've been really enjoying it it's it's it's it's not it's different it's meant to be cheesy as i'm trying to think how to describe it it's it's not uh it doesn't take itself very seriously i guess would be the way best way to approach that show but i like it i wish hank was here to talk about this but i was talking to my wife about black lives matter and um oh what it is right here is that still going like i didn't know the debate still i feel like their big flash Black Lives Matter. And what did she say? Right here. Is that still going?

I didn't know if that was... The debate's still going. I feel like their big flash in the pan is kind of on the downturn. Yeah, the debate's going. Trump's speaking right now. Wait, are you talking about Black Lives Matter or the Trump... Black Lives Matter, yeah.

No, it is still going and it's playing a role in the election. And my wife was like, the big problem with Black Lives Matter, aside from seeming racist you know i said on this show a while ago like the problem is everyone screaming for diversity actually means more of me right you know it's not all lives matter it's black lives matter you know we need a bigger latino presence on campus we need me me me me I want my group to get shit is mostly what we see here.

All it usually means is we want less white men here. I think it means we want more whatever I am. Yeah. Now, I don't think – if it was that, I'd even have an easier time getting on board with it. But it's usually like Latinos saying we want more Latinos in this position. Black people saying we want more black people to get a leg up on this sort of thing. We need quotas that give me this. Although now a lot you're seeing that they actually want to go back to almost Jim Crow style stuff.

They're saying we want a black campus. We want a black dormitory. We don't want any whites here. It's not about inclusion. It's about exclusion for them. They're're not shouting let's include every color of the rainbow they're saying let's get all the whiteys out my wife yeah this is the central point i was trying to bring up was jackie's like one of the issues with some a lot of these groups is their representatives are terrible you know if you think about imagine in your head the people from the 1950s or the

Rosa Parks um and what do you get there like a black guy in a suit just wanting to eat at a diner you know a hard-working woman on a bus who just feels like she shouldn't have to sit in the back right now it was a plant by the NAACP though now it's um uh um typically a criminal like oh yeah this guy was a drug dealer he's got grills on his teeth he got shot dead after just strong arming some liquor store but he was working on his GED and was really thinking about turning his life around, and this is our symbol of Black Lives Matter. It's the Trayvon Martin, the Michael Brown, all these like the worst bullshit problems in the world. There was a person recently in my area

got shot by a cop, and he was a black guy, and there was a warrant for felony drug dealing, and when the cop saw him the guy ran and he ran and he jumped over the first fence and so did the cop and then when he got over the second fence the cop couldn't follow over the second fence and he shot him now the cop is saying there was a gun on the scene or something but i feel like that's like it wasn't concrete like there it is right on his hip you know or like he didn't shoot back or anything but he shot the guys he was running away and um while i wish he wasn't shot i i feel like if if if he was if the warrant was

for murder or something and this guy was like known to be dangerous open fire but it was for drug dealing and it's like yeah he's in the neighborhood you'll catch him again tomorrow at the same time you do have to take a measure of responsibility for your actions insofar as like was it right for the cop just to open fire and shoot no of course not but we all know cops aren't perfect we all know that there's a lot of shitty ones out there there's a lot of good ones too but you shouldn't be rolling the dice like that and be like yeah am i gonna keep sprinting away from this guy who could potentially kill me yeah i'll roll the dice you know i take no accountability he he shouldn't shoot me so i'll just keep running like and then

when he gets shot it's not to say that it's right it's just to say that it's not surprising you should have anticipated that maybe my solution is like hey as a rule of thumb you don't shoot the guy unless you feel like he's a real danger to society. Yeah, that's how it should be. And running from you isn't enough. You know, it is a felony drug dealing warrant for a felony drug arrest of some sort. It's not dangerous. Well, it's dangerous, but it's like it's it's not a shooting offense you know like it yeah

unpaid parking tickets all the way up through drug dealing maybe you don't shoot unless you feel like there's a danger involved and um so um uh but the the point my wife made that that was really strong is all the representatives of the current race relations people like think of the guys who crashed the bernie sanders thing right those those women screaming at him terrible yeah nobody wants to be on their team they were terrible for their cause uh every time there's like a trayvon martin or michael brown michael brown is the ferguson guy right they get his name right correct yeah um nobody wants to be on Team Dickhead, who just strong-armed some convenience store guy,

stole the Swishers, and then bad-mouthed the cop or something and possibly pushed him around. I think all the evidence pointed to the cop story being true. This is not people holding hands dressing up and saying we shall overcome it's thugs saying you know the cops are shooting our thugs and yeah it's it's creating a divide in that i feel like they have a losing position yeah i don't understand why they're examples if all of these atrocities

are occurring of just innocent people getting mowed down by cops just like hey come over here no you can't fucking tell me to come over there pig and then they just get lit up like if that were true don't you think they'd have a lot more and i'm not saying it's not 100 like it's not saying it's 100 false but like wouldn't they have more stories of like oh jeff smith uh... you know trustworthy account lived in the you know a fucking suburbs had two children and they've had the pool getting put in for the summer time

i'll come down as he you know drove away being three minutes over on his uh... parking meter like you would think there'd be something crazy like that but all the big ones that come out it'll be like oh you know tony stevenson oh he got shot in the middle of the street and you do like 30 minutes of research or 30 seconds and it's like oh so he was punching a cop in the face or right oh he had just burgled someone and threatened to kill them and then they lie about it right like first they released his like childhood photo as if that's representative of who he is anymore right cherub face beautiful child and it's like showing a picture of like me when i was 12

it's it's not representative at all when you see that picture of him as a kid and him as an adult i know this is like three years old but it's laughable where it's like when you first see it and you get that image in your head you picture it as Zimmerman, like almost like rubbing his face in the ground before just blowing his brains out for fun. And then you see like the actual image of the kid and it's like, all right, well now it makes a little more sense that that big fat pasty fuck was getting his head beat in.

Yeah. Don't call him pasty. Don't let him forget. He was Latino, half Latino. We like to point that out. Latino. Yes,

he is. Anyway, I just – if you're somehow involved in Black Lives Matter, then, gosh, pick your representatives a little better. No more screaming, screeching women at Barry's – what's his name? Barry Sanders. Why am I getting this wrong? That's a football player. Yeah, Bernie Sanders.

Bernie Sanders. Thank am I getting this wrong? He's a football player. Yeah, Bernie Sanders. Bernie Sanders. Thank you so much. Yeah, no more screaming, screeching women at Bernie Sanders things. No more rallying around drug dealers. Find some better examples. Find a modern-day Rosa Parks, and you'll get everyone on your side. Yeah, no one will have any problem with their message if they just brought it out and they were like, you know, Tucker over here got shot

just on his way home from... What? Oh my god, don't say that. Come on, I know how to slip a segue in there. Kyle was going to tie one of our sponsors into this Black Lives Matter talk and I did not want to do that at all. Alright, well, on a completely separate issue.

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Go to Tracker.com right now and enter promo code PKA for 40% off. Again, that's Tracker.com, promo code PKA. So check this thing out. This is what it looks like. Sorry, Merkur's picture's messed up. I'll fix it. And it's about the size of a quarter.

I'm personally going to put mine on my keychain, and it works both ways. You can have your phone locate your keychain, or I think Kyle said he was going to put his on a range bag, which is pretty neat. Or you can have your keychain, in my case, locate your phone, and Kyle said he was gonna put his on a range bag, which is pretty neat. Or you can have your keychain, in my case, locate your phone, which I bet happens even more often. I feel like I'm often leaving my phone in the car

or in the living room or whatever, and it'll make your phone make noise, even if it's on silent. So I'm just gonna have this thing on my keychain, which I never seem to lose, and it'll help me find my phone all the time because it works in reverse. And if I do happen to lose my keychain

or my wallet or whatever, then I can use my phone to locate the other side. And it's pretty awesome. So anyway, check out the tracker thing. Size of a quarter, fits on a keychain, slips in, like they have, I think this, So anyway, check out the tracker thing. Size of a quarter. Fits on a keychain. Slips in. Like they have, I think this, oh, here's a key on one. There was another one where they showed a photo of it in a wallet.

But I think that's in the video and it's long to watch for this spot. But you could slip it in the wallet in like a credit card spot. And it'll help you find your phone or your phone can help you find your wallet. Vice versa. I'm excited to get mine. This seems like something I'll actually use constantly. So this earlier today,

Chiz was like, Hey, we need to know your color and your engraving and they're going to send it to us. And I'm like, yeah, like it's another one of those sponsors where the stuff they give me gets me psyched.

So anyway, it's pretty yeah i'm uh i'm gonna put mine on a range bag that if it got lost it would be you know a problem it's got valuable stuff in there like little things that go along with what i do that are just expensive and you know there's could be a couple grand worth of stuff in there very easily and if that were to get picked up or like left on a tailgate more likely and then i drive off and it falls and somebody finds it i think mine i told him if there's room for it to inscribe it you know like my phone number and then call for cash reward or something like that you know because I know if I find a bag full of goodies I'm not looking for who lost them if I'm being

completely honest but if there was a thing in there that said cash reward I would be honest I would be more likely to be like oh well I gotta call the number and do this so yeah yeah so check them out very good for a pet too you know of course I think that's the perfect thing to do with it because it's got that waterproof accessory but if you've got a dog that runs away or a fish they have a deal like I should I shouldn't get the prices wrong it's right you have an outdoor fish so what's the PKA thing you get 20% off? Is that what it is? 40% off.

40% off. Holy shit. My God. Can you check that? That's too good. There's no way. Almost too good to be true. I don't want our listeners to take advantage of them.

You can get one for $30, or it's like buy three, get two free. So it's five for $90, or buy five, get five free. So you could put it – could but i don't know somewhere in here i feel like there's a better deal than just getting one of them you know you could put one on your keychain and your wallet and your dog and be able to find all these things so it's uh you know uh you know what i bought recently what did you buy a casper mattress really yeah it showed up um today actually it's it upstairs, still in its box. I'm in the process of building the frame.

I'm going to build one of those invisible frames that I saw on Reddit. So it appears that the bag is levitating. You showed us that. That's going to be neat. Yeah, it's pretty simple to build. So I went and got a bunch of lumber today. But it's upstairs in a box. And I got a king-size bed. But I swear to God, it's in a box that you would I guess it's

maybe two feet by two feet and maybe three and a half feet tall like I don't know how it's in there apparently as soon as you take those things out it just starts to like grow yeah Kitty messaged me today and with a picture of it

she was like do you want me to take it out and let it go ahead and start to breathe and i'm like absolutely not i want to be there on a watch yeah yeah i want to put it into place where it goes and then just like pull a string and run away as it like forms into my bedroom that's that's my dream of course but um but yeah i'm looking forward to having king size bed for some reason it just never occurred me to to me to do it to upgrade from a queen size that I've been on for many years. And it's just not enough room. You know, more room, more room.

It's pretty cool. I bought mine before we had Casper. So I hate to say I bought it somewhere else. But I have had internet beds before. And that's just totally the only way I'd do it now. The other way with the driving, even though I have a truck, like you'd have to fit it in there and shit, it sucks.

This way they just put it right at your door, the money back guarantee with Casper. And like you said, you sort of put it in place, and then it like unfolds and grows in front of your eyes. It's pretty neat. Yeah. God, I was about to steer us back to politics.

I'm so ingrained into it right now i i'm i know that people don't want so much political talk and we won't go back there or anything tonight but i i'm really fired up for this season not because i'm like behind any a candidate or anything like that i just find it so entertaining so entertaining for me it's more slow torture hand-wringing. I am legitimately trying to figure out which candidate I like the most. And at this stage, I'm almost going to find some guy with like 0.1% of the vote

that represents me well. Kasich is still right there in the mix. He's on stage right now. Like I said, I've got the debate in a little silent bubble on my screen. He was speaking just a moment ago. Kasich is not going to be one of the choices available to me.

He said he's going to stay into it until the state of Ohio, which is his home state. And he says if he loses Ohio, he's out. Yeah. Doesn't he know he's out now? Yeah, he should. All right. So there are possibilities where he could get – it could go well for him, I feel like. I feel like it could happen.

I mean, I don't think Trump really tears him down nearly as much as he does Cruz and Rubio in some sort of scenario where Trump exits. He's not as relevant. No, he's just not. It's hard to see a path for victory. Most people don't know who he is. There's a clearer path to victory

for Sanders than there is for Kasich. But alright, no political fucking talk. It's so easy to get into because I love it so much. We need to go somewhere else. Alright. We got to. I'm with you. Let's just change the topic. Did you see the teacher

who had to resign? Bullshit! You know this one? The teenager founder phone? And no punishment so far yet for the student who did it. I guess he got some new photographs. Wait, catch me up on this story.

I thought you were referring to... Student? The pepper flakes? All right, all right. So let me see if I can scan through this and help you guys catch up. South Carolina news outlets are reporting a story

about Union County high school student who grabbed his teacher's phone, found nude pictures of her, and shared them with his friends. So that's what happened. He found her phone and he took a picture of her phone with nudes on it. Like he didn't use it to, uh, I don't see the pictures. Um, he took a picture of her phone and then said he'd send the nudes to anyone who asked, let me, let me see. I want to get the actual quote um he told the teacher your day of reckoning is coming right so he's like threatening the teacher letting him know that he has this honor can you imagine being in her position where this dickhead 16 year old is going to ruin her career for kicks so he told her her day of reckoning is coming general in sa of general in Sauron's army is she dealing with

when he's saying that her day of reckoning is upon her? That's Morgoth. Morgoth, yep. The teacher's totally cool. She's like, he's 16. We all made stupid decisions at 16. Oh, my gosh. She also said he knows right from wrong.

Where are you putting the moral of the student? I think that's a good point. But I want to find the part where he said that he would send it to anyone who asked. It wasn't like he got it and showed it to a friend and it just sort of slipped. This guy's a real asshole. Does he have Twitter? Can we get a hold of him? Kyle, if he had Twitter, we certainly wouldn't say it.

No. Yeah, we would never do such a thing it wouldn't give him the attention he told the whole class that he would send them to whoever wanted them that's that's the line so what a douche what a dick fart at 16 i was i was an idiot at 16 but i was not so vindictive that i thought it'd be funny to get teachers fired. He's thinking that far ahead. Your day of reckoning is coming? Oh, then maybe so. Good point. Day of reckoning.

I like that. Sounds like a smart kid. I think this kid's day of reckoning should come. He's a serious piece of shit. No punishment for him thus far from what I've read anyway. Her phone wasn't locked. And apparently that is the error in judgment that they gave her.

They're like, look, we can put you through this disciplinary process. In the end of it, you'll probably be fired. So she resigned rather than go through the process. Jeez, that sucks. That really sucks for her. That guy's a piece of shit. So a friend of mine was a teacher in Atlanta. This made kind of a national news story. But what happened was she went on vacation to the Guinness Brewery and while they were in there they had a tasting and everybody is drinking a beer. And there was a photograph

of her drinking Guinness beer at the Guinness factory on her Facebook and the school district fired her she sued the school district uh got a big settlement um and got a better job in the long run but she had to fight it for a couple years uh they fired her because she was drinking at a brewery yes there's a picture on her on her Facebook drinking a Guinness beer you're not in a party environment like it's not like it's a club scene people that drink beer especially women that's low class activity right yeah it was according to scene. People that drink beer, especially women, that's low-class activity, right? Yeah, according to Woody's dad, he would just see that and be like, well, yeah, what did you expect?

Didn't that haven of debauchery think no one will find out? Well, maybe... Well, maybe if she flagellates herself and punishes herself well enough, then it'll be okay. Or some biblical punishment. Ten Hail Marys and only water for a month.

My father's having surgery tomorrow. Oh, goodness. That's true. Yeah. It's... He's having surgery tomorrow? My father? What did you say?

Your dad or your father? My dad. Your dad. My dad, yeah. Man, a lot of surgeries in your family. Yes. At a place. Yeah.

Maybe just two, but that's a lot. You're missing my mother-in-law. Usually they're probably zero. So, three. Yeah, kind of bumpy around here lately. With Colin? Yeah. Yeah, Colin's the most recent one.

Well, until tomorrow. You must have been so afraid when that happened. I'm just imagining that drive to the hospital. I've been on some drives like that. I was the kid in these scenarios, but there's one time when I was, I don't know, maybe 11 and I confused children's Motrin, which an 11-year-old can pop four of or five of, with my father's Ultram back medication that he was given after a ruptured disc surgery on his back. Some extremely powerful

painkillers that my dad who's like 275 pounds or something, he's like, oh, I took half of one. They made me so dizzy and lightheaded. I can't stand that feeling. He wouldn't take them. He was like, I'll just deal with the pain. I take four of them as an 11 or 12 year old

and wake up in the night virtually paralyzed from the waist down. My lower body was numb. You had your suit suit on. My lower body was numb. I get up and vomiting. And, you know, I worked it out myself pretty quickly. They were like, what did you take? What have you eaten?

You know, et cetera, et cetera. And I was like, oh, those painkillers. I took four children's Motrin. And they're like, well, let's get them. Let's look at them. And we get them. And they're like, well, let's get them. Let's look at them. And we get them. And they're like, those are our children.

So, you know, not emergency trip fast as you can go through every, every, I just remember every light was green and, uh, and like, I'm over there praying and just,

just like can't film. And I remember we got to the hospital. Were you still pretty much paralyzed at this point in the car? I was very wobbly. No, it was lower. It was, it was weird. It was my lower body, like waist down was like was very walking head no it was lower it was weird it was my lower body like waist down was like it was like it was asleep but not in a tingly way

like in a very numb dead kind of way and i was really stumbly and couldn't walk very well but we get there and they didn't pump my stomach i don't even know what that entails exactly i would imagine you need to be unconscious or something for that but um they they gave me uh that activated charcoal mixed with chocolate milk and that absorbs anything and everything, all the toxins, and then brings it back up. And I just remember we're sitting in this doctor's office and I'm drinking this stuff in this back room of the ER and they had that fake wood panel wall and I'm staring at it, fucked out of my head. It must have been so high. So high. You can imagine a child for the first time taking extremely powerful painkillers.

I don't even know what they are. But I saw the devil in the wood, in like the artificial wood grain. And I was like, I see the devil. And my dad's like, he's saying he sees the devil. What should we do about that? And the daughter's like, where do you see the devil and i'm like on the wall and then they realized that i wasn't like i wasn't saying that i believed the devil was present that i was just like that kind of looks like the devil and then everybody was like saying i see a hippo in the wall yeah yeah you were just describing the shape they

thought you were going into a darker place with it exactly yeah but um you know i just remember how terrified my dad was just hauling ass getting into that er as fast as he could and just looking over and like you know are you gonna be all right buddy you're gonna be all right and just just how worried he was and i'd never seen him that scared and i'm just imagining a similar scenario there that's terrible it wasn't like that so i was prepared to do that like as we're leaving the neighborhood and stuff i'm like i am just gonna you know go as fast as i can get him to the hospital because colin's pale he's sweaty he's throwing up and he wants to sleep and these are all like like i know that these are shock symptoms i just don't know how serious shock is like is that something that's kind of cool and not a big deal or is it

like no don't let him go into full shock because then the heart stops or who knows yeah right so what er to know he should stay awake yeah i right and then i mentioned that to my wife and she's like i think that's just with head injuries like i'm not even sure i don't know so let's not risk it stay awake yeah yeah and i i told we talked about this on pk and a little bit i'm playing like happy music like upbeat stuff stuff, like Call Me Maybe. But traffic was kind of bumpy. There was no 95 miles an hour because I'm on like Capitol Boulevard. It stopped.

I'm hitting all these red lights. And I'm like, you can't go anywhere unless you're driving on the sidewalk. And I'm like, that doesn't seem like the right call here. It seems like, one, I'm bumping the poor kid around too much. And two, like there's a real chance that I could take a, you know, problem on a scale of 1 to 10 that's a 7 and make it a 9. If I start off-roading, you know, on the sidewalk and things. So I'm stuck in traffic. And then we hit the highway and I'm like, now'm really gonna open it up you know I'll go a

hundred if I have to my exit was like a mile and a half from the house so it elected as soon as they get on the highway and start going the GPS is telling me to watch for the exit like well okay so that's that's what the drive there was like yeah and then well I i'm really i was really glad to hear that all went well and everything and uh yeah i think we're really blessed to to have modern medical care and you know be able to make something like that as if it never happened again because there was a time privileged yesterday we went and saw the surgeon again so most people haven't seen that uh update oh no there is no update in most people don't know i went to the surgeon again so most people haven't seen that uh update oh no there is no update in most

people don't know i went to the surgeon yesterday and he took it apart and sort of looked at it and they redressed it and um you know touched the toes and stuff and he felt really good about colin going to be okay so were you having any like maybe maybe in the moment it didn't seem like irrational but like when you were taking the boot off was like your head just catastrophizing the whole situation like you were thinking like three or four toes were just gonna fall out of the boot or like they've been totally severed and that's not that's not a joke like because i know like when stuff like that goes down even if you know it's serious you instantly go to the furthest point of like oh my god they're not just like they don't just have a broken arm

that probably punctured some big vein and they're fucking you know musculature and now they're bleeding out and there's pools of it inside like were you thinking anything like that yeah i mean i've had a little first aid training maybe everybody has but i was a lifeguard so like every year we'd get like first aid again and uh you know i was like how much blood loss i took the boot off like it so first he said he hit his foot, and I hadn't seen it yet. Like right out of the gate, he's upset, and he hit his foot. And I'm hoping that it's kind of a blunt trauma type thing. And I see the cut on the top of the shoe, and it's already bleeding through the boot,

which was pretty serious. He can picture a caterpillar yellow construction boot. That's what Colin was wearing. It's what I wear. Okay. So there was a cut on it and there was blood coming through the boot. And I'm like, ooh, this is bad. And almost opposite of you, I had this hope that if the cut on the boot was like four inches,

the sock would be three inches and the foot would be two or something like that. And then when i took the boot off and saw through like the sock and the skin were kind of almost attached and it was open and bleeding and that's when i started wondering about tendon damage and uh yeah so did it almost like slice the sock into his flesh you know where it like almost presses it in there yeah there were actually a lot of pieces of sock in the wound um it's a black sock so it was really like like what are these things and that's one of the things that happens with bullet wounds uh that causes them to go septic and people to actually die from bullet wounds is the pieces of clothing that are pushed into the body cavity by

the bullet itself because the bullet was a piece of hot lead flying through the air at 3 000 feet per second there aren't too many germs on it but if it pushes pushes your shirt into your body they don't find that especially in 1862 with a big ball bearing you go septic gangrene all that stuff and you're done for no antibiotics with um so the first person to treat Colin was an ER surgeon. And in hindsight, the gap in skill set between the ER surgeon and the orthopedic surgeon was really big. So the ER surgeon said there was no tendon damage, even though I brought it up to him and mentioned that he can't move his toes. He's like, oh, it looks okay. And then as he was like stitching it, like he had cleaned it out and as he was not stitching it, but like preparing to stitch it. He did like one last check and he's like, oh, these toes aren't moving. You know, it bothers me that when I lift his foot, like the other toes are all going, the two outside toes are going in, the middle ones are not. So then he called in the orthopedic surgeon. The orthopedic surgeon spent,

well, first of all, you know, instantly, yeah, these tendons aren't working. And, you know, spent a lot more time cleaning it out like you know he after he cleaned it out he discovered the black sock and he's like oh that's what all these little black i forget what he called them but like little black fuzzies that you might get from a sock he's like that one that's what canvas came from and it's like we want to get this really clean because that's a sock you know like you mentioned i guess any clothing is bad but in my head like I want to say socks and women's underwear is the worst thing ever.

Nothing's worse than women's underwear. No, you don't want that to just fester in there. That guy defended vaginas. There's no bigger feminist quality than someone who would defend vaginas with such vigor. I would defend Hank Green with equal vigor. I have an AMA question here. defend vaginas with such vigor. I would defend Hank Green with equal vigor. He defended those vaginas to no end.

I have an AMA question here. Was there more? I don't know if people want to hear about Colin and the trip. Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Continue. The surgeon cleaned it up and they had to push it to the next day because there wasn't a pediatric department at the closest hospital.

He moved to us to us felt like heaven and earth like he called 10 different doctors and assembled a team they came and operated on a sunday and it looks like it was successful so that's the wrap-up of colin's foot yeah go check out woody's video they did um that he kind of does a day in the life of the day of going and walking Colin through the surgery and getting the aftermath of it. It's very funny. I think everybody had a lot of fun with how high Colin was coming out of painkillers. And they made a lot of funny memes and pictures. It was really good.

Yeah, we got Colin in the recovery room. And also, a lot of people were impressed with how he spoke. Most people haven't heard Colin speak in a long time. And he talks a little bit. In spite of the fact that he's high as a kite yeah he's talking to us i noticed that i hadn't seen him talk in a video in years and i think i don't know when the last time you posted one was but i haven't seen one probably four years or so and it's it's markedly better like it's very much improved so That's good for him. I'm happy to see that. His mother and I work really hard on that. So here's a tough question.

His mother and I, we don't have much, but what we do have, we give to our children. He's saying that like some peasant. We're scripted and saved. We don't have all the privilege you have. The privilege of hard work. The two of them would say, your mother and I. My father would use language like that. My father, if he would refer to

the two of them, would say your mother and I. I don't know. Maybe it's a Jersey thing or just a Woodworth thing. Anyway, AMA question. My question is if Woody was to get seriously injured or die, possibly in a horrible tractor accident, would Kyle

take on Woody's role as main PKA host or would pka since cease to be and if kyle was to continue with the show who would be the third host i think heaven forbid if such a thing were to happen we would need someone to take over tech but i don't think that guy would necessarily be the other um host or um person to be part of show. There would just be a guy who handled the tech somehow, however that would work out. There'd just be one guy who was the main figure. Like you could potentially

replace me with Chiz and Wings. Yeah, it would take two people to replace Wings is what I'm really Woody is what I'm getting at. You'd need one guy to take on the technical things that he does, you know, recording the show and making sure the overlay is placed in place and that everything is right.

And he's the one who takes the final look and the only look, really, at the finished product before it goes live. So yeah, you'd need a tech guy to handle all that. And then you'd need a Wings of Redemption or another person to fill in. I don't know who that person would be. I don't know how me, Taylor, and Wings would flow, really. God, it would just be a...

Who would slow that retarded train down? That would just be a cyclone of nonsense. Yeah, yeah. I would be like, oh yeah, tell me more, tell me more. And you would be like, what if it was even crazier? And Wings would be like, oh, it gets even crazier then then she started licking it and it would just it would just keep

going and so you almost need a voice of reason somewhere to be like you need someone no don't say that and make the turns you know when when we're talking about belly button fucking and you know hour three is winding down you need someone to come in and say hey did you hear about this you know let's fucking get you in this in this direction now you know hurt him because you do need someone like that on the show yeah but yeah i don't know anybody who who would fit i think you would know more than me i would like to get go be more diverse with it i think the next time around i'd like'd like to find maybe a black host or a gay host or maybe a black

gay host. I have a hood pass and I'm like 300% gay. I'm coming really close here. And that's why I want to replace you with a gay black guy. It's the only way to make it happen. A gay black hockey star

or something. I don't know gay black swimmer the rarest of unicorns the gay black swimmer but yeah I don't know I don't know who it would be but we would definitely go on because I really enjoy this Chiz would probably be the tech guy

if I'm being honest and I feel like he would be like in kind of like an Ed McMahon role. I think I would like that anyway, if that was the format of our show. He'd be like that fat guy on Conan, who kind of chimes in every so often. Better though. So here's the difference between what Andy Richter does for Conan and what Ed McMahon did back in the day for Johnny Carson. Johnny would not let Ed McMahon shine. He didn't get any funny jokes.

He just kind of pumped up Johnny. But with the Conan thing, that guy's actually funny. He's really funny, and Conan lets him go as far as he wants to go. They've tried to get rid of him on multiple occasions, and Conan always stood by him. I think he's very funny. He's really talented. Yeah, he is.

But that's what we would want. Yeah, something like that. Another guy, another option, I watch the Joe Rogan podcast sometimes. And like, okay, I watched one recently where Brian Callahan said that, I forget who it was, but you know, X-Fighter was on penicillin at the time

for staph infection. Or antibiotics. And I didn't know this, but everyone says antibiotics completely drain your energy. I don't think I've ever trained on antibiotics or. And I didn't know this, but everyone says antibiotics completely drain your energy. I don't think I've ever trained on antibiotics or something. But that, oh, but like in the MMA world right now, like Luke Rockhold was on antibiotics, he had this issue, and then other people haven't. It's just like everyone agrees that antibiotics

completely sap your energy, okay? So, Brian Callahan says, this guy was on antibiotics during that fight. And they're like, oh, James, would you look that up? And then within like 20 seconds or so, they confirm the accuracy of a statement. And I feel like that would be a neat little addition to the show. If we had a guy where it was like, can you find a picture of this? Can you find a video of that?

I'd do some of that. But it also takes me out of the show. That's a rabbit hole that's risky to include on the show though, because before you know it, it's going to come up every two seconds where I'm telling a story like, oh yeah, my uncle, he went to fucking Africa on a safari and he saw lions and tigers

and bears and someone will be like, oh, there aren't tigers in Africa, is there? Does anybody know if there's tigers? Someone check that. Check that. No, it turns out no tigers. There is a small puma. There's some pumas in Africa. Do you know about that, though? Oh, wow.

I don't know what a puma is. I thought it was just a brand of shoes, and then just some stupid thing that we go off into the weeds because we have the internet. But yeah, it would be nice to have someone like that. But can you imagine how much it would solidify everybody as hating Chiz if just one week we come back and we're like, hey, Woody has passed away, unfortunately. We got Chiz if just one week we come back and we're like hey, Woody has passed away unfortunately we got Chiz here though

no, that's not what I'm suggesting I feel like Chiz could add to what we do every week I feel like so when I look at the Stern show and how that goes down there's a lot of people I think Chiz should be in a a Gary in a Gary Delebate role where he's not on camera

he's not on mic. His mic's turned off. It's muted. But if there's a fact checking thing that comes up or if Chiz himself is referenced. If we have a thing you know where you're like I, you know you brought up Chiz earlier. Yeah what was I saying about him? Something um. Oh that he believes

in conspiracy. Oh then all of a sudden you him? Oh, that he believes in conspiracy. Then all of a sudden you turn that microphone on, you have a little conspiracy talk with Chiz, and he turns it back off, and he continues to research Reddit and the internet for little topics that he can shift over to us, like he's doing right now anyway. That would be pretty awesome. Do we want a conspiratard to be our designated researcher? Isn't it better that way?

Yeah, that's PK. I found something on 911tr11 truth for real.net oh the truth about w bush dot biz you know let's check this out but uh but i like that aspect and i like the aspect the two of the things that i like about that show that they do um and many shows i suppose is that the guest is kind of in, does his thing, you get what you're going to get out of him, and then he's out. Because sometimes it's hard to include the guest for four hours, to do a full show with the guest, especially if their thing is really, I don't know, specific. Or if we don't know them very well, which

I think we've all done a better job over the last month or two months of getting to know our guest after we had that old guy that frankly I just didn't know who he was. I did a little research in advance. I had some questions about his trip to Alaska. Yeah, you did. I did none for that guy. That one was a surprise for me.

In any case, I kind of like that. I like a guy in the background who's not part of the conversation and then maybe three times throughout the course of a show, he'd chime in with something really relevant and really pick his moment

to put something in there. I think he could shine in that regard. Yeah. Would your first go-to be wings to bring in? Yeah. Yeah, I think it would have to be. I mean, you know, I think it would just have to be. I feel like if Woody did, in fact, you know, pass away

or have his larynx removed or whatever the case may be that requires him to leave the show, you know, the fans would be screaming for wings. It wouldn't, you know, that's what they would want. They would want someone familiar, not just somebody out of left field or you know go getting some just to be contrarian because i think wings would be a good pick too there's probably other people that that they would like you know heck i think they might have screamed for wings when we pick taylor and uh you know just to replace lefty and now that that we're, I don't even know, 100 episodes in with Taylor,

they really agree with our choice. I would probably run it past people like Richard Ryan, who I'm pretty close with. And then he knows, he's got such a huge network of people that he knows that if he wasn't interested, like I know, I mean he's really tight with everybody from Jenna Marbles to Philip DeFranco and all those people. He knows them personally.

So he would be a good person to be like, hey, we have a position open. It pays this much. Here's what it would require. And maybe he could help find someone from that pool of persons. But yeah. And sometimes the best person, and Wings qualifies for this, but the best person would be someone who's not crazy successful right now. Right? Because, like, let's say hypothetically Jenna Marbles wanted to do it.

Great. Except that every other show she's traveling to, like, Ireland or Zimbabwe or something, greeting fans, so she's going to miss a lot. If you grab someone like Stone Mountain 64 or who's the guy who was athletic and a big fan of the show everybody loves him i think he advertised with us the one who lost all the weight right oh no no you're thinking of jay two cents no no this guy um rock on yes yeah rock on rock on m1 m1 m1 um like someone like him might more might value the show more. Philly D is excellent.

I love Philly D. I think he's great on the show. But he's got so much cooking that it might be his lowest priority. Yeah. I guess we have to go with wings. Just like the Sunny crew, I don't know if we have the deepest bench. I think we do. We could make something happen

I think I might get murdered at the end of this they're going to be like really we get Philly D fuck Woody let's go yeah but Chiz comes along with that so poor Chiz I like

Chiz but the fans are just just real yeah and I think he does well on the show he's polarizing that's the thing about Chiz, but the fans are just real. Yeah, and I think he does well on the show. He's polarizing. That's the thing about Chiz. Chiz is polarizing. It's not that, because you always see this thread, oh, make this guy a permanent member of the show.

Make this guy a permanent part of the show. And I feel like Chiz has contributed more and been funnier more often than many, many people. I don't know. It's just my opinion, though. It's a renaissance, man. I watched the first 20 minutes of a movie called Zombeavers today on Netflix. I've seen it.

Bill Burr's in the beginning, and I got a chuckle out of that. And that's what hooked me and got me to watch 15 minutes. And then the titties started coming out, and I got stuck a little longer. And when I turned it off, I looked at my girlfriend, and I was like, I expected there to be more actual beavers in that than there were. Like, we're 20 minutes in, and all I've seen is titties and Bill Burr jokes. Wait, when you say actual beavers, what kind of beaver, like what variety of beaver are we talking about?

Mutated, furry creatures with big teeth that come out of the water. Okay, the rodent beaver Not a vagina Are they rodents? I guess so right I'm not 100% sure I think that's a rodent Because vaginas are definitely not rodents

No those are They're part of humans That's what I'm getting at Actually they're part of lots of animals Part of rodents even you know we've come full circle now and now you know we gotta disambiguate it once again yeah but uh let me just i'm not gonna ruin the movie for you because you've already seen the best part which is the bill burr intro that hooked me into and then i just kind of sat there for the next

hour and a half waiting for him to come back on screen and he doesn't happen doesn't no so i would say cut your losses and treat it more like a funny youtube video that you found that chick has an amazing has amazing breasts they're they're they're just like they're like i don't know they're like medium size like a b or something but they're like perfectly symmetrical and they're just like they're like a golden ratio yeah they're very nice and she just decides that it's topless time, and it goes on for like 10 minutes of topless time. She's just like, yeah, I'm just not going to wear a top.

It's just us girls. And I'm like, yeah. It's like they got to the end of the movie, and they were like, shit, this thing is an hour and eight minutes long. We have to have something else to beef this up. Nobody watches an hour and eight long movie and thinks it's real. They're like, all right, we got like 12 more minutes of that girl topless. Just put it in there. We need to look real.

It needs to be 90 minutes for a real movie. I appreciated that. It got me to watch that terrible movie for like 15 minutes. They keep having scenarios where redneck men get kind of semi-rapey with them. That happened twice in the first 15 minutes where there was some

redneck guy who was like, yeah, looking good over there. Said something like that in kind of a threatening manner. Yeah, he's just standing on the other side of this little lake, and the girls are getting, they're kind of stripping, taking off their tops, jumping in this dirty lake. And then on the other side as they're like frolicking and splashing this green amoeba-filled water onto each other,

he's just kind of like, how you girls doing in there you enjoying yourself in the pool you like in the water and he's just pretty much talks to him about how uh you know if they need to avoid bears isn't that what he said well there was a bear there he saved oh he saved him from a bear when he got there um but's a shit-tier movie. It's not worth the watch. I did like the titties, and I liked the Bill Burr cameo. The Bill Burr cameo was very good. It happens in the first five minutes. That's all you should watch for that movie.

Watch the first eight minutes and turn it off. How many girls have you said, I love you to in your lives? Are we including family members? I'll say no. I think romantic is romantic as implied. I don't know. I'm not cheap with the I love you's.

I think most of the WoodyCraft staff has heard me tell them that I love them. I think it's two. Two. Two ever. Maybe in like a stupor one time. I let another one slip. Do text messages count or you got to say it? Text messages do count.

I was going to say no. I was going to say they do because if you don't say it to them in person who's texting, I love you. Like, I don't know. I've never done that. Apparently Kyle. Apparently Kyle. Kyle's just spanking, you know.

No, I bet I've said it to like six women or something. Like, I bet I've said it in grade school through high school. Yeah, I'm not nearly as cheap with the I love you's as maybe people are. And fuck, I know for a fact I tell it to like guys, staff

members and shit. I'm not frivolous with those. I've it to like guys, staff members and shit. Like it's, I'm not. I'm not frivolous with those. I've only got like four total maybe. So I think I've said it twice and meant it both times and no more. You mean you've said it ever twice? No, I've said it to two people twice. Okay.

The way you phrased it made me think. I'm like, Jesus, he is very frugal with these. I love one per relationship. So you better make it count. Whip out your fucking phone and record it. Transcribe this bitch. Yeah. So, yeah, I think twice, twice.

I like a world in which they're handed out a little more liberally. Fuck that. I don't I don't know, because then you more... If you're the first one to say it, then you feel more vulnerable. Because then you kind of put yourself out there a little bit. You have more to lose. I don't lose a goddamn thing when I say it. Someone will come to me with a brilliant idea.

Like, I love you, man. Like, great. It's just... uh well you also don't want to dilute it you know you want it to mean something uh does it have to be that like cheap with it you know like i i think that when people hear it they're like it's a reward you know it's not like i say it every day but yeah i don't know it doesn't if it. If you put too much value on it, then you can't hand them out. I mean,

there's a difference between romantic relationships and I tell my dad every time I see my dad when we depart, I say, love you, dad. See you next time. He's like, drive safe, son. Love you, too. We say that every time we leave each other's presence or whatever.

And we always have. I always noticed that my cousin didn't tell his dad he loved him and i always thought like what if your dad dies dude you better let him know and uh and i've always thought that from this even when i was a little kid i was like just fucking tell daddy you love him he might not come home how are you gonna feel if you don't tell daddy you love him he didn't come home and after a fight or something you know if you if you yell at him like i'd be like all right but let's go let's go make up now make sure he knows i love to feel if you don't tell daddy you love him and he doesn't come home? And after a fight or something, if you yell at him, I'd be like, alright, but let's go make up now. Make sure he knows I love him. What if he doesn't come home? And I think that about lots of things. I don't like leaving

things poorly with anyone. I like to go and make up and make sure that I appreciate them and how I feel about them because what if they don't make it? I thought about that a lot more as a kid i think the whole like oh no what if my mom dies in the next two hours i didn't say i love you before soccer practice is that a garth brooks song if tomorrow never comes it may be

would she know how much i loved her yeah All right. I have a thought. That's about his daughter. If you're listening to this on iTunes and you agree with me in that I love you shouldn't be so limited and strict, rate us five stars and say I love PKA. If you're listening to this on iTunes and you think that love you should be a little more restricted, tight, and mean more, rate us five stars and say, I think of PKA as a friend. It'll be huge. I actually would like, I don't know. We used to be like,

when we first went on iTunes and such, we got ratings all the time. I should just ask for ratings. I bet it would make a big difference. No one says they love more than me. Yeah, so you can either think of PKA as a friend or you can love us.

Leave a comment. Give us a rating. I would love you for it. Eh. The debate just ended. Who won? I'll let you know whenever they start talking about that or it's printed. I wish it was more like sports where at the end of it there was a score posted and everybody knew. I'll say this time they ambushed.

No, I'll say this. They ambushed Bush last time and a lot of people. I'm sorry, Trump. And a lot of people felt like Trump didn't do well. He's still, you know, people don't abandon him for one bad debate. But there's no ambush this time. I think Trump knew exactly that both of these guys were coming at him and I imagine he was more prepared.

Headline currently, Trump challenged on inconsistencies at Fox News debate. Challenge. Trump classic and Trump zero. I have always wanted... Um, challenge Trump classic and Trump zero. I am. I've always wanted it. So, okay.

Politics talk, but not necessarily this race. It is nice when a politician is consistent over like a 30 year career, because you pretty much know what to expect. If you vote that guy in Bernie Sanders is totally consistent. He has always had these kind of socialist views. I don't want to say it like it's an insult, but he's a democratic socialist. So he has had these socialist views and he's felt that way since the very beginning. He's also very strong on human rights and I like that about him. Unwavering, you get

what you get. If there a politician that like changes with the wind you know hillary clinton for example she's pro-irok war then she's you know well i shouldn't have been pro-irok war she's pro this she's anti that she flips all over as to whatever is more popular at the time when you vote for her you don't know what you're going to get it could be anything how long has sanders reported gay marriage a long time like over 20 years so a very very long time uh hillary that's a really good there's an example she was anti-gay marriage in the 90s and she's pro-gay marriage now in like 2007 or something there are clips of her espousing traditional marriage as the way she thinks the country should be like little late it's not even the 90s yeah I so on the other hand I like I know my

positions have changed a little bit you know that it seems like politicians are allowed to evolve and grow and change their thoughts let me let me throw this idea out there I feel like the fact that Bernie Sanders was that liberal way back then I don't know if that is a positive. Like, I read an article today, Bernie Sanders was supporting transgendered rights before it was even a thing. Well, think about what that means. He was just up there like, and if anybody wants to do this, that's okay too. He just seems so, I love seeing him, I see those pictures, I saw one today of him handcuffed to, like chained to

protesters. They were chaining themselves and doing a sit-in or something and fighting for civil rights. And I love that. And man, I don't know why black America doesn't see it and latch onto it and love it and lap it up. I don't get it. But if I were a black voter, that's what I would look at and say, look at a guy who's been fighting for my people for as long as he's been a man. But I also think that, wow, he was radical 40 years ago. Like, 40 years ago. He's talking about stuff that's a little radical today, and he was into it way back when. He's so out there with some of that stuff.

He's so out there with some of that stuff. If you're being honest, looking at his achievements as a politician throughout his entire career, it doesn't seem like there's that much. Two bills that he wrote went into law, I believe. Who knows if that's a political fact that came off Reddit. But it just seemed like he was so radical for so long that he would stay on his ground and just be his own man, and everything else just kept moving along. Yeah, it seems like he stood his ground

to the point of being ineffectual, where it was like, hey, will you work with us on this? Nope. Yeah, he's an island in a river. All right, well, then we can't work with you if you don't help, like, seed something to us. And it's like, nope, nope, this is the way we do it here. This is the way I do it here.

I don't know it just seems like for how old he is he's gonna be the fucking oldest president in history like if you go back and look at similarly aged presidents who got elected at that time in their life like they seemed like they had done shit politically like achieved stuff you don't so they said that reagan would frequently take naps during security meetings and stuff. The guy was in his early 70s. He was tuckered out after the first five or six hours of an intense presidential day. I think he was present from 70-year-old to 78, maybe.

Okay. Yeah, he's an old guy. You want somebody with high energy. That's all I'm saying. You do. That's all I'm saying. That's not even a joke. You want high energy. That's all I'm saying. You do. That's all I'm saying. That's not even a joke. You want high energy.

Yeah. You want Trump. 69 to 77. But, Okay. 77 and 349 days, so. So pretty fucking, yeah, okay. And 69.

So 70 to 78. Bernie would be 74 or 75 to 82 or 83 to dead let's be realistic putting that much stress on a 74 year old doesn't you know a little bit of calisthenics every morning isn't undoing that they're all old you know like trump looks healthier rubio actually is okay you're right yeah cruz is younger too but i meant um between hillary sanders and trump we're back i think of it as like the way i think of it as dogs you know like dogs age a seven-year-old dog and a six-year-old dog you don't expect either one of them to just drop dead a 13 and a 14 year old dog you know once you get to fucking 13 that's already old as shit so that

difference up to 14 for a dog that's a way bigger year for that fucking dog than six to seven similarly a woman at 69 has a lot more life in her than the average man at 74 just by the numbers by how long people live by the genders he does not have a lot of gas left in the tank and i don't know is that's the biggest thing that's the biggest argument against him as far as i can tell it's just his age it's like you're too fucking old dude can i ask him a list question what is the you're going to interrupt my melissa question with your own? I'm really excited about mine. What is the poster she's working on?

Like, is there a thought process behind that? Is that going to be merch? It looks really cool. The thought process behind it is she's working on, she's not working on it right now, she's sleeping right now, but she's been working on it a lot. And she wants to get it all finished like super super

detailed all colored in and everything and then find some like poster store where we could sell high quality prints of it online because trying to put that onto like a t-shirt it's just it would be too much detail and it would almost i feel like it would bleed together and not be not look very good but something like a print uh poster poster board i think that would look very good, but something like a print poster board. I think that would look really good. So that's the plan for now. But yeah, she's really excited with how it's turning out too.

She was expressing some frustration with a couple people who left comments being like, Woody's arm is huge. Like Woody's arm is, and she's like, I think I kind of fucked it up and I went over there and it was just the most flattering way.

Yes, I'm a big fan. I like to think that's how some people think of me. When someone wants to know what I look like when they ask for ID, I'm bringing the poster around. Like, here, don't look at my driver's license. Check this shit out. Trust me, I'm the one in the middle. Yeah, no, no. You're right.

It's flattering. It's not bad. It looks like a really good-looking human, a better-looking one than me, and I'm fine with that. Her explanation to me was like, all right, this is after the three of you have been kind of on the zombie run for like 18 months, so you're all in very good shape. Yeah, I've lost a little body fat, gained a little muscle, and we're good. good shit yeah i've lost a little body fat gained a little muscle and we're good and then did you notice chiz's uh decapitated zombie head in the forefront on the bottom left i didn't yeah she she asked what to include and i was like i will draw henrietta the chicken it's got a dangling zombie head draw chiz dead there and his dumb hat um yeah it's looking really cool yeah it's looking really cool it's on her Instagram what's her Instagram for people who want to see it

if you go to I think it's jojieblues j-o-h-j-i-e underscore blues b-l-u-e-s or just go to my Twitter and you'll see her being followed by me jojieblues and you can go from there but yeah it looks really cool I'm excited

about it kyle i was gonna ask if she's still playing fallout no she is yeah she totally got over like a three-day period she went from still a little excited because of the release and the hype to just like fuck this game i'm so tired of not having any real dialogue choices uh i feel like all these missions are the same and then she just hasn't been playing. Yeah, I've been done with it for a while. I am excited about the DLC. I bought the season pass

because when you do the math, it's like $30 versus like $60 or something. It's much, much cheaper to get the season pass and I was going to get it all anyway. But there's three pieces of DLC, one for March, one April, and then one May. I think May is when you get the actual like expansion where you go You know it's an it'll open up a new place to go and a whole new storyline with its own unique loot Etc etc and stories and stuff

But then there's one man. There's one that at Damn it. I wish I had in front of me. There's there three pieces of DLC that all make the game better. I can't think of what the other two are, but I'm excited about that. I think we got the pass, so maybe we should try those. Good. I've been playing... I got Far Cry Primal like four

or five days ago, and I've been playing it so much. That game is... I don't know if you guys have ever played Far Cry before. This is the first time I've played a Far Cry game. It's a barrel of fun. I'm loving it. Are you guys going to try this one? No, I won't. I'm mostly on the Fallout thing.

I'm excited because there's a new Civilization game coming next year. It's actually made by the same people that made Civ V. It'll be Civ VI. I'm excited about that. That'll come out next year, I think. That's an actual... That's actually made by the same people that made Civ V. It'll be Civ VI, so I'm kind of excited about that. That'll come out next year, I think. But right now, it's just Fallout, and I don't know what's coming out at the end of the year. There's no big games that have me intrigued

or interested at all, to be honest. You should try it if you like. The only negative part of the Far Cry Primal one so far is, like, as far as upgrading, it's supposed to be like prehistoric. Like you upgrade from a really bullshit like club to a really pretty good nice looking club I guess. Like if you were prehistoric times you'd look at that club and be like it's a pretty fucking dope club. That's a nice club.

But that's it. Like you just get up to a really nice club and then you get to a really nice spear with spears and then like a really nice bow and arrow but it's like prehistoric times so you never really upgrade to anything serious to do damage other than like some bullshit like fire bombs and clay pots and then you

can command animals to do your bidding which is cool like riding around a bear or just sicking bears or saber-tooths on people. That's really fun. Yeah, I like these kind of open world games where it's like Skyrim but

way easier to find all the stupid resources that you need. Like you never have to go spend 20 minutes desperately hoping for iron ore where there was iron ore before but now there ain't iron ore no more. This one, you just walk around everywhere, and every resource is easy to find, which is nice for the most part.

I don't know. You guys haven't played, so this is boring. Sorry. No, that sounds pretty interesting. I might have to look into that. Hey, just want everyone to know that this episode is being brought to you in part by Loot Crate. Loot Crate is a monthly subscription box service for epic geek and gamer items and pop culture gear. For less than $20 a month,

you get four to eight items that include licensed gear, apparel, collectibles, unique one-of-a-kind items, and more. Make sure to head to lootcrate.com slash painkiller and enter code painkiller to save $3 off your new subscription.

Loot Crate is more than just a subscription service, however, it's an entire community of fans that share their experience and interact with each other around the unboxing of each month's crate. And they guarantee $40 or more in value in every single crate. Sometimes, it's a lot more. Every month, there is a different theme, and all items are curated around that theme. Previous crates have included items from franchises like Star Wars, Marvel, and The Walking Dead, The Legend of Zelda series, and many more. The theme of this month's box is Versus, celebrating many of the greatest rivalries in pop culture, including Dark Knight versus Man of Steel, Alien

versus Predator, Spock versus Mirror Universe, Spock, Daredevil versus Punisher, Harley Queen versus Everyone. Our exclusive items include something you can display, something you can wear, and something you can use. And don't forget your tea and loot pin. Remember, you can only you can only, you have only until the 19th of the month

at 9pm Pacific time to subscribe and receive that month's crate. And when the cutoff happens, that's it. It's over. So, go to lootcrate.com slash painkiller and enter offer code painkiller to save $3 on your new subscription today. I like Loot Crate's business model. If you had talked to me like two years ago or something,

I'd be like, I don't know. But what's changed my mind is Hope. She is constantly wanting to sign up for like different subscription services she found one that was for uh people with red hair and she's like you know it's like beauty products and stuff that do you know what it's called because they usually have trendy names no uh it's a shame but it's like you get a present every month every month there's a christmas and like things come up and it fits your hobby like if you're into games and comics and stuff like that, every month you get a new loot crate and you're like, ah, cool. You know,

this will be perfect on my desk at work or my shelf at home or whatever. And, um, I, I, I toss around this idea constantly. I've looked into like billing systems and how I'd get going for a, um, it wouldn't compete with loot crate at all. It'd be a totally different market, but it would be a similar business model. I'm like, I bet I could launch this and people would like it and I'd have happy customers. I think of a lot of us, I think Kitty and Chiz were discussing a particular thing the other day. They were looking at like domain names and stuff for, again, wouldn't complete with Loot Crate, it's a completely different genre of products. It's a really intriguing business

model. People seem to be enjoying it. It's catching fire. It's just such a great business. You're rewarded every month with all this cool stuff. I guess it's similar to when you get those magic cards and you open them up to see what you got, if you won.'s a little bit like uh like the lottery so yeah it's it's a cool thing um and i know for christmas hope's list was dominated with loot crate like things um so it's it's neat yeah if you if you want you know geek gaming and Loot Crate is the dominant one in the market. I guess because they're the best.

How much farther are you going to go with the beer, Taylor? I trimmed it up recently with some scissors. And I also every two weeks trim this area here. Because otherwise it just gets into that. I find myself chewing a lot and a lot of my chewing is of my own mustache hair. Tasting your soup two hours later.

Yeah. Everybody likes their own recipe. I don't like that. No. Only twice though has Melissa ever turned to me and just been like you have food in your beard and only once has it been in public and even then Only twice, though, has Melissa ever turned to me and just been like, you have food in your beard.

And only once has it been in public. And even then, she should have just let me deal with it. So it would have humiliated me into chopping this thing off. But no, I like it. I like having facial hair. I have a very round face. And so I look much younger when I don't have it. And it's fun to have facial hair.

You look older that look like older benefit that doesn't go away but it does stop being a benefit I I believe you yeah starting to look more silver than dark brown or black I'll start to agree with you definitely yeah I don't know I like it I think I'm gonna let it keep going the only thing like I have to take scissors and like trim up this area which now that i'm feeling right here i did a bad job i need to redo that but it gets so poofy if i just let it get out that it just has this big melon head just a big people are staring in the streets when i have long hair and the beard's out of control because it's just a gross big head um but yeah i think it looks okay right now. The, um, I have a topic I wouldn't,

I'm, I am excited about the Conor McGregor, Nate Diaz fight. I talked about it a little bit last week. If you're watching this on Saturday, the fight is tonight. Uh, for me it's Thursday, so it's a few days from now and Conor and Nate, oh my god they know how to hype a fight the thing about nate ds is he's a legit like street badass right like he's from 209 stockton etc and uh like he he sees other fighters that he has beef with at events and stuff and tries to start fights. It'll be like casino tables and stuff when he's like, oh, fucking Khabib Nagamenev is here. Let's go. This Russian guy is like, what?

That's for TV. Khabib. And I'm sure I... Khabib. He's the craps table. He's got that big rake coming at your ass over here yeah yeah I'm sure I ruined his name yeah and Diaz rolls like his whole crew like like he trains with four or five other people and like his

brother so I don't know if Nate is the guy who's fighting his brother's name is Nick and his brother's like right there next to him. Like, oh, are we getting down? Let's get to throw down. Come on, motherfucker. Come on. I thought it was for publicity. Until he said he would push my shit in.

They always roll like five deep. Like Jake Shields is there. Nate Diaz is there. Of course, Nick Diaz is there. I messed those two up just now. And there's like a bunch of like UFC level fighters like with them and everyone else is like wait what the fuck I'm getting like

like jumped by a gang a UFC gang these guys seem like real scumbags if they're just going around with a group of professional fighters and just challenging people what a bunch of cunts just showing up

places you know poor igor just trying to enjoy a little bit of a little bit of the good american life before he has to go wrestle in the you know ussk wrestling league over there in russia it's all real too like like you know they get mad look for one day one day to enjoy himself in new country other fighters are hyping fights and they're like, those are fucking wolf tickets, man. Wolf tickets. I didn't know what wolf tickets were. Apparently wolf tickets is when you're buying into fake hype. He does not sell wolf tickets.

He is just fucking, like, he really wants to beat this guy. Conor McGregor talks trash, right? He's like, oh yeah, he's making cholo gang symbols with one hand, but he teaches kids Brazilian jiu-jitsu on the weekend so he's making balloon animals with the other hand and nate diaz is like what the fuck is that man what the fuck does he mean by that i think i felt like that was a prepared statement that got me mad and and the way he gets mad and stuff his poses aren't tough to me but they're genuine and he's tough, therefore they're tough. But he's always covering his –

Wait, Conor McGregor does that? No, this is Nate Diaz. When he makes these mad poses, he covers his – goes like that. Instead of having his hands up like, all right, let's – like Chael Sonnen, right? He was in a feud with W wanderlei silva and it was real and chael sunnan is there in like is that bigfoot silva no it's a different guy they call him the axe murderer anyway chael is in like flip-flops jeans and like a sleeveless shirt of some sort and uh wanderlei but on the other hand is tired of chael talking trash, right? So he shows up in board shorts with a mouth guard.

He carries a mouth guard around with him. And he's also got like a sleeveless shirt on. And he's talking shit to Chael. Like, I'm going to fucking punch you in the face. Come on, man, you and me. And Chael is like, you can't get this close to me. You know, like, look, you can pretend you're tough and everything, but you can't do it from one foot away. I can't let you get this close to me. You know, like, look, you can pretend you're tough and everything, but you can't do it from one foot away.

I can't let you get that close to me. And he kept, like, closing the distance. And I don't know if Chael took a step backwards or whatever, but he's like, hey, man, you can't get that close to me. And then he did. So Chael went to, he double-legged him, put the guy on his back. It was greatest thing ever. And he's like, what am I supposed to do?

The guy showed up in board shorts and a mouth guard. How do you take him down? And he's threatening to beat me up. Like, it's go time. Nate Diaz. Chael was probably like, he's lucky. I didn't just shoot him. Stand my ground.

Chael's from a bad area, too. It's called Westland, Oregon. There were years where his father made less than a hundred grand so that's like his big thing you don't understand rough place people drop bubble gum wrappers jaywalking was rampant they don't even care

like right in a cop's face gun wrapper it was rough dark apparently stocked in Yeah. Like right in a cop's face. Gun wrapper. I know. It was rough. Dark. Barely made it out of that hood. Apparently stocked in, I don't even know, like California towns or anything, but it's rated as one of the worst places to live in America. How does Detroit not own places 1 through 50?

So Nate legit is like trying to fight at different press conferences and stuff. And Connor just kills everybody. Nate legit is like trying to fight at different press conferences and stuff. And, and, uh, Connor just kills everybody. But Nate is so much bigger. He's just, he's taller. He's bigger.

He's stronger. I believe Connor is more skilled, especially since they both seem to prefer striking. And Connor is amazing at it. He was a pro boxer and he's got these crazy question mark kicks. So amateur fight analysis gone here isn't he slower connor seems so fast and so able to like get inside and do his damage and then get out before it's too late isn't nate too slow especially since he didn't have a training camp um we're

gonna find out to me like i should know better than to bet against connor he always seems to win but nate so much longer like i don't i don't the way connor's got the kiss of death in that left hand right uh that's what um connor could kick him connor could take him to the ground isn't is connor better on the ground no no nate is pretty good on the ground he doesn't seem to go there in his recent fights but nate is jujitsu black belt and connor is Is Conor better on the ground? No. Nate is pretty good on the ground. He doesn't seem to go there in his recent fights, but Nate is jiu-jitsu black belt, and Conor is one of those.

I really want to see Conor beat the shit out of that guy. You might. After just hearing the story told of them being dickheads patrolling around random people in a big group of fighters. What a dick. What a dick. It's true. Those are real dick moves but the mma world loves them they just make predictions i say i say connor kicks him in the fucking head knocks him

out or he kicks him in the body stuns him and then hammers him into the ground i say a kick is what does it i say i'm gonna say that diaz knocks him out in the first round or no he submits him in the first round and i'm going to say that because nothing that i want to happen in sports ever happens i'm going to say nate diaz wins three out of five rounds in a decision victory what oh the realistic prediction jesus that makes me not want to buy that paper view now. Like even hearing that is a possibility. I think Conor's going to have a real hard time hitting a guy that big. Like the way Nate Diaz is like, you beat up three midgets and now you think you're something.

Because Conor, he has a frame that allows him to cut so much weight. And he looks like sickly on weigh-in day. But then overnight, he looks like a badass on weigh-in day but then overnight he looks like a badass but he cuts more than everybody else so like mendez remember that guy we saw he beat him in uh chicago yeah he could walk up to mendez and just about put his chin on top of the guy's head nate can just about do that to connor i mean it's not like straight up but you know he'd have to he'd lift his chin and i bet he could do that um i look forward to seeing this um what are the undercard fights and let me ask you this about this one specifically i keep hearing about a bisping fight with um silva silva

is that the same night no that happened that was uh what was the uh what happened bisping won three rounds so he won three out of five for a decision win okay okay um i i just reading what i read on the subreddits um i hear a lot of people say that bisping would have had a much greater career if it weren't for people who use uh peds is that is that something you buy into a A hundred percent. So performance enhancing drugs, steroids typically. And if you look at Bisping's career, like all of his big losses are to people who didn't just do roids, but like got bust. They're like the super roids.

It was what made them what they were. They were known for being roid users. Shale Sonnen, now that he's retired, is like, I was on all of it. I am an expert in performance-enhancing drugs, and I love them. They're responsible for my career. And Dan Henderson, holy shit. The guy's like 47, and he's just perfect specimen, et cetera.

Maybe he's 44-something. He's really old. Jail, Dan Henderson. Of course, Silva, who he always wanted to fight all this time. Once the USADA testing comes up, Silva's getting popped for being a steroid, you know, a big fucking pet head. Is that Henderson, Silva? Mm-hmm. And so it's like, what would his career would have been like?

What do you have, 16 title defenses with Silva? I'm sure I'd get it wrong, but it's a lot. It's like a record i think and yeah i think so i think it's 16 yeah or 16 consecutive wins that's probably maybe that for a number that high because he had a bunch of fights at 205 uh that wouldn't be title defenses but yeah that guy he was on roids you know and people people like no it was just on roids for the one fight he was caught horseshit he's doing like mtv cribs tours and he's got like syringes in the pantry and stuff fuck he's not diabetic don't worry it's b12

so uh so that guy's on roids his whole career um and he's brazilian which you know some people are gonna fuss at that but they're well known for doing the roids that Jose Aldo his camp since they started doing testing for steroids is one in seven and Jose Aldo himself like they came in there to test him for steroids in this Brazilian camp but the Brazilians they do they just do they do a lot of steroids. Not that Americans don't. We got Chael Sonnen. But they went down there to test him. And he hid or wasn't there or something. They called ahead.

So then the next day they go to test him. And he doesn't show up in time. And then like day three. No, no. Then in that afternoon they finally test him. And he trips and spills his urine sample. It's a professional fighter who can't navigate like... A bathroom.

Yeah. A doctor's hallway. Yeah. Well, they came to his gym. They go find him. He tripped and spilled his urine sample. So now he gets another day. And this stuff is washing out of his system.

And then on day three, they give him a urine on day three, they eject the guy saying that he doesn't have a visa to work in Brazil. So he doesn't have to give the urine sample. And then like they test them a week later with some local guy. And by then he's clean, fucking dirty. And how are they supposed to really gauge the best of the best in a sport like this where like you just said i don't follow it very closely but i've heard of chael sunnen

before i as far as i know he's like a known to be a good fighter there's the fact that he came out after he retired and is kind of saying oh yeah all that great shit that i did because i was doing steroids in part i don't think does that change their legacy in UFC at all? It does change their legacy and he retired because he got caught for steroids. Oh, that ended his career. You know more about it than I do but I feel like with someone like him, it almost doesn't

stick to him because his thing is being like he's the Donald Trump of the UFC. He's the guy just talking so much smack and so much shit and being really petty and he has a sense of humor about it at the same time. He's got so many funny little one-liners and quips, and at the same time, he seems like he's too old to even still be in the game, but he fought Jon Jones like two and a half years ago or something like that

and came this close to taking the belt on a technicality because Jones literally ripped his own toe off in the ring while they were wrestling around. And while Jones is beating up Chael, he tears his own toe off. Yes. And I'm not exaggerating. It was dangling by the, like that. Yeah.

How did he tear his own toe off? It got twisted on the mat at an angle and it like twisted like that way. Like twisted that way like like yeah twisted that way and torn off and the thing about it was it happened with may i'm gonna say 25 seconds to go in the entire fight and during that 25 seconds in the they're fighting yeah i thought it was in the fight no he um at the end of he managed to maybe you're right because it's kind of the same thing. He beat Chael with like 10 seconds left in the round.

If it went to the end of the round, then he wouldn't be able to answer the bell. Does that mean that you lose? It means Chael would have won. He couldn't have continued to fight without a toe regardless of the fact that he'd been doing well. He'd won every round. But, you know, if you're in round three and, you know, or whatever, and you don't have a toe, you can't go to round four.

And on that technicality, that ridiculous little thing, Chael would have been the champ. And Chael's not supposed to be the champ. But I wanted it so much. I wanted to hear what he said. I wanted to know, he could have been really gracious and said, I grant him an immediate rematch. He might have been like, God ordained me to be the champion.

Retire on the spot. I'd have retired on the spot. You know what? I came in here. I beat the best. I left him a broken man. We'll see if he ever walks again. I'm out.

Yeah. Retired. I'm going to go to my uh you know fox commentator job or i'm gonna go talk on sports center and i'm gonna make some money there with a belt but but connor is fighting nate this weekend or tonight and it is one of the i talked about it last week i don't want to repeat myself too much but you don't always know if there's going to be a super fight and connor shows up to fight every time if connor's gonna fight he's had real injuries he's had a blown acl he's had a thumb he can't move and he still shows up in fights and um uh thanks to connor even though his opponent dropped out he just picked up a new one went up 15 pounds but actually 25 pounds from his normal weight he's still fighting the guy

and uh it's pretty amazing so i'm very excited and you just asked about the undercard um misha tate is fighting for the title against holly holmes she's the woman that beat ronda rousey oh i know who that is yeah i only know who Misha Tate is because I've heard you say her name. Does she have a chance? Yes. I think my money's on Holly, but Misha Tate is definitely

game. On some nights, she's got to be the person to beat Ronda, I guess. Looking back, it seems like on a lot of nights, a lot of those people could have beat Ronda after I guess. Well, looking back, it seems like on a lot of nights, a lot of those people could have beat Ronda after that fight. Ronda beat Mishita twice, so the score is kind of posted there. Okay, I didn't know.

Yeah, that's fair. But, I mean, heck, she went into the third round with Ronda on one of those fights. Things can happen. Well, where do you stream it if you don't want to buy it um like what website i would never i would never do such a thing of course no i wouldn't either just so i do know to avoid it right right yeah if you wanted to make sure that you know nothing like that ever happened to you you don't accidentally go to the wrong site um some people are known to look for like a twitter hashtag like hashtag ufc197

and just search there and a lot of times people like that would be advertising their stream i've never even thought to do that on twitter maybe i will do that someone i know said that's how he does it in In all honesty, I usually buy the fight. I figured you did because you support that sport quite a bit and you may as well pay your 40 bucks or whatever it is. Is that how much it is?

I think it's 60. Oh my god. It's a lot, isn't it? I wish they had a season. They have a fight pass, but I wish they had... How much is that had it's like 10 bucks a month but it doesn't include the pay-per-views i wish there was a way like i don't buy every pay-per-view um but like i i wish i could pay like 40 bucks a month and just get every pay-per-view i they probably get more out of me and i'd get more out of them, and everyone would be happy.

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Squarespace is pretty awesome. Check them out. Yeah, it doesn't matter if you're building a portfolio, just expressing yourself online or starting your own small business. It's definitely the way to go. Yeah. If you could express yourself in any new way online, Kyle,

how would you express yourself? I feel like if you had some sort of... Squarespace website? Is that what you're leading to? I was about to say a thing, but then I don't want to say anything too racy about our sponsor. Maybe if you were... It would be good for bug fighting, I suppose.

There's a middle of the road. Really, anything. I suppose if you were an aspiring artist, that would be good to get your work out there online. So people can come and take a look at it maybe purchase it, something like that I'd be like a belly button fucker fetishist I have the domain name sleepingwithwoody.com for setting up just a snoring

mp3 purchase site yeah I thought that was a completely different website when I signed up and I don't like all the spam you guys are sending me I don't even have it yet I do have the domain but I haven't made the site. Are you actually going to record yourself sleeping? That's the thought.

I know Kyle's got some. It's awful. It's awful. He snores so goddamn much. It's bad. My nose has been broken. Lozon doesn't complain. Lozon doesn't complain when he gets his face beat in. Lozon doesn't complain. Lozon doesn't complain when he gets his face beat in. Lozon doesn't complain.

As long as, you could probably piss in like a bucket in the corner and he'd be like, ah, that's Woody. He'd go with it. He'd go with the flow. But he'd snore so goddamn loud. My father snored, you know, throughout my life. So he would be down the hall snoring and I could hear it down the hall through two closed doors I would have to stuff something under the door to drown out the noise is snoring

nothing like you though yours is so consistent my dad would have that thing where in the middle night it would start and go for half an hour and then stop like maybe we rolled over you start snoring when you become unconscious and you don't stop snoring until you wake up till morning and sometimes it sounds healthy sometimes it sounds like I might need to go intervene I'm like in my head I'm like maybe he was like you know doing that number and something went in because that's what it sounds like right

now because I don't even know if it's true you know in those movies where someone gets possessed by Satan and all of a sudden their diaphragm and their throat is held open and they're inhaling a lot of voices like that that are a bit inhuman was it like when the witch king

is riding into battle I remember something like this. You know what they should do? He's all Tucker. Instead of having another disc, because what's his name from Big Lebowski already has a disc where he's sleeping and you can listen to him sleep as you try to sleep. Why don't you come up with a different disc for different bodily functions? to sleep why don't you come up with a different disc for different bodily functions it could be you're pooping with woody and then just intermittently you hear shit sound that kind of makes you feel like it you play it when you're on the toilet so then you feel in company like you know oh but don't be embarrassed about your own pooping noise you know i'm right here with you

i'm pooping with you hey it could just go all the time so when people hear funny noises they don't assume it's you right they're just pooping noises just coming it could just put it the time. So when people hear funny noises, they don't assume it's you. Right? They're just pooping noises. It could just play it on a loop in your bathroom. And then when you go, they might not know that that new one is you. Just provide cover. Yeah, just flip that thing on.

Leave the running auto blow in there. Nobody's going to be bothering that one. that auto blow looks so sad in its drawer i was looking for some batteries the other day and i saw it it just looks so pathetic with the like the pussy pulled pulled out of it and all like sitting to the side all like folded onto itself it's so disgusting looking like like silly putty that you rolled over your knee it's yeah it looks just like last time i used it you know it's all ah why did you leave me like this you know it's it's a bad thing poor thing you should take the texture of those like when you feel it is what i imagine like uh ted cruz chin feels like kind of like that it's

almost like you could push it here and because it's just straight from chin down to chest you can grab it almost like a sieve. Just kind of like squeeze it and it would feel like a flashlight almost. I saw a GIF the other day on Reddit and it was a woman riding a man's dick and you're looking from – you can see her ass. So you're looking from that angle. And another woman – Reverse cowgirl. The woman is facing the man.

They're facing each other, and she is riding him. Oh, you said you could see her ass. Now I'm really confused. And you're spectating. Oh, so she's cowgirl, but you're in behind. Yes. Behind her. Okay.

You're from the angle of looking at her ass as it goes up and down on his penis. You got a nice female ass and balls. Yeah. Then another woman. They call it in the biz. Reaches. You got a nice female ass and balls. Yeah. Then another woman. They call it in the biz. Reaches. Then another woman, a second woman, reaches into the first woman's asshole and grabs the dick through the asshole. And she's jerking the dick inside the pussy that's riding the dick with her hand.

And it's inside the woman's asshole. And she's literally wrapping asshole around the. that's riding the dick with her hand and it's inside the woman's asshole and she's literally wrapping asshole around the it's great i'd never seen anything like that yes that must feel so amazing i um there is a gif in like reddit's wtf subreddit and uh and i saw that and and i was watching the woman's face who had the hand in her butt. She was just kind of like, alright, this is okay. That was her vibe. Maybe I should go back to grad school.

I've always wanted to teach. And not to teach someone to masturbate a man in my asshole. Imagine the self-esteem that you must not have to be approached about that kind of scene all right you're gonna be stephanie listen to me you're gonna be riding him yep just riding him regular and she's gonna reach your hand no we talked about this bear with she's gonna reach it into your asshole all the way yes stop crying yes all the way in and then wrist deep in there you know i imagine that her asshole after that kind of event would look like uh you know those wacky wavy inflatable tube men like if you cut one of their arms off and it's just a blown out ruined ruined cavernous hole. Loose, floppy. And flopping around.

Exactly, yeah. Yeah. That was great. I'd never seen anything quite like that and I've seen a lot of weird shit. So I always like to see a new thing, you know. Whenever there's a new thing. When I discovered the belly button fucking, I was like, oh, look, a new thing.

A thing I didn't know could even be done. At this point, it's cool just to find a new thing that you haven't seen on the internet. Yeah, it doesn't have to be particularly hot. I don't think I'm going to end up in a scenario where somebody's going to be able to reach into a woman I'm fucking's asshole and grab my dick through her asshole. She wasn't an unattractive woman either.

Oh, they were all hot. Yeah, yeah. It was a hot scene, despite the fact that what was happening was outrageous. Yeah, that is outrageous. Yeah. But yeah, just finding a new thing. You know, when you're a kid, there are always new things. A blowjob.

She just inflates my cock? Oh, that would feel good. Oh, I see where you're going with this. Yeah, and you're like, oh, 69. You mean both at the same time, huh? Oh, wow. Oh my god would feel good. Oh, I see where you're going with this. Yeah. And you're like, oh, 69. You mean both at the same time, huh? Oh, wow. That's double your pleasure.

Oh, my God. How risque. How many people know? Double your pleasure. Double your fun. Except that I have to eat that nasty vagina now, and her butthole's going to be right between my eyes the whole time. But okay, all right.

That'll work. And you're always learning a new thing. And now, as almost a 30-year-old man, it's rare that I find a new thing and now as almost a 30 year old man it's rare that i find a new thing but um you know internal hand jobs and belly button fucking these last uh over the course of this last month have been have been wonderful finds for me like the internet ruins novelty like that it just takes everything novel and new and then it just gets drilled into your head so much with memes and whatnot that you ruin it like i used to always think as a kid when i was raised up to be pretty religious and i was like six or seven years old there's like a bible chapter that was like there's nothing new under the sun to god and i would

always think even walking around like that's crazy like there was someone like me playing ice hockey back in the day like nothing new and now looking back it's like how do people even believe that now was at some point on the serengeti 10 000 years ago was fucking mcgumbe reaching into taisha's asshole and jerking off another tribesman like no that did not that was not a thing until the internet in this century i bet it was you know so much new stuff we're gonna be finding new things 10 years from romans the romans were outrageous i read about Caligula and just the outrageous stuff that he would do.

The crazy sex parties and stuff. I think it's all been done before. But we're just finding out about it because society shuns the internal handjob for some reason. I can't imagine why. I can't. It's upsetting.

Would you say no to an internal handjob? Hypothetical single me? Yeah, you're hooking up with two chicks and they're like, hey, how about this while Stephanie rides that cock? How about I reach up her asshole and grab it and squeeze the fuck out of it? I would say yes to that. I'd be like, yeah! If I'm at an angle where I'm just feeling it and I don't have to watch it.

Get your head in there. Grizzly endeavor. Get your head in her ass and lick my cock. When this is over, she's going to give birth to your face. I like to think that with my father's surgery and everything, my mom mom's gonna miss this episode yeah you'll see mom you're so busy focus on dad so what's belly button fucking it's all the craze i see it's my parents they you probably know what was the first thing you

ever saw online that probably when you were younger that like opened your eyes like shocked you that something like i got it could even exist so i remember um we stumbled upon bestiality and and it was that horse fucking that man to death and it opened up this whole idea that there was bestiality and that it was a thing that not only did people practice but like they were attractive people that are into it and there's a whole world of people are into it on the internet we discovered that at school and uh luckily we were good at hiding our tracks because we were on our teacher's computer and nobody ever like made a big deal of it but but that that was the most shocking thing as a kid i say kid but you know like a freshman in high school um

14 i guess 13 or 14 and being like what the fuck what the fuck she's sucking the dog's dick and that's what a dog's dick looks like holy shit that was weird the first yeah because i was 25 when i first got on the internet i felt like i I knew most of the stuff, but I hadn't seen it all. So like, like for example, um, when a dog has sex with a woman, doggy style, of course, they like to put socks on his front paws to, you know, cause the dog like gets a good grip on the woman's hips and, uh, and they, they put socks on his paws. So not to scratch her up. That was a surprise to me. I didn't know that thing. I didn't know that pro tip.

So for me, it was just little things like that. A lot of scratched backs before that river was forded. I'd say one. I think you learned on the first one, right? I would think so. This isn't something that we do, so it wasn't the internet taught it to me. Yeah. I wouldn't, if you were going to fuck a dog, if someone had a gun to your head and was like, if you don't let this dog

fuck you, I'm going to kill you and everyone that you know. And you were like, oh god, get the socks. That wouldn't be your go-to thing. Now it would, because I'm, you know, I know a thing or two. God damn it, who's got the tube socks? Who's going to reach in that dog's asshole and jerk me off?

Oh, right. You're having sex with a female dog you lucky duck i would just say that because the because the animal the forced animal rapers i feel like we get a chuckle out of that and i'd maybe like bring them over to my side and get the gun away from them and then i'd make them fuck the dog yeah i didn't expect your answer to be so similar to mine where it was once again bestiality of stumbling upon something like that on one of those like but like trying to find regular porn on the family computer like age 12 and i'm just like god damn it none of these images are loading fast enough because like you get like three bars worth loaded down you got a third of an image and the tits aren't even on screen yet but you can already think like this isn't going to do it for me exit out restart you gotta you know get this going

again and then you get a little bit too adamant and then suddenly there's horse fucking and horse blow jobs on the family computer as your parents are just like on the couch right over there you know all that horse cum whenever you see a woman taking a cum shot from a horse it is fake.

How? How do they fake it? Do they inject it all in there at first? They sure do. It's like they use condensed milk or some bullshit. I had to know. I had to know because I see them like, I know that they had this big fake horse vagina they use in artificial insemination.

And I was like, if it's so easy to just give this thing a hand job why wouldn't you know those farmers do that and just collect it so carefully that these women are able to and then it turned out that yeah like every horse ejaculation scene ever is pretty much fake because it takes more than that to get a horse off I guess

but that's just what I've read there's no way it takes more than I've seen horses buck like for real on a farm and those things are not masters of stamina when it comes to fucking it's just it's a hop on it's like maybe the dick goes in

like sometimes just splay off to the side he kind of rubs on her leg and he's like alright see you tomorrow like it's not a precise like oh you liking that yeah had you seen a person get fucked by a horse before have you seen that a guy it's very upsetting i don't like yeah i have seen a woman and i have so there's this woman and she does it inside like a barn and she's she's she's very heavy set when in rome she's not obese i wouldn't she's not like so fat that you're like oh my god she would need a scooter

or anything but she is heavy set and she's wearing a lot of leather and she like bends over the stall and like braces herself and this pony that i'm gonna estimate weighs 600 pounds i think i'm a pretty good estimate of that because i've worked around cattle i'm gonna say this pony that i'm going to estimate weighs 600 pounds i think i'm a pretty good estimate of that because i've worked around cattle i'm gonna say this pony weighs about 600 pounds and it mounts and its cock is about this big around and about i'm not going to exaggerate 18 to 24 inches long you make that sound big it's a foot and a half to two feet long. And he puts it in. And his fucking method is like... And then he'll pull out a little. And you can see him get his feet together. And there are haunches in the back.

It's like a real fast twitch muscle thing when they operate. But then you see him like... It would be like if you see a man's ass cheeks squeezing in a in a porno when he's like really hammering the horse does that and he's just like and the woman is making pretty much the noise i just made she's like but she's enjoying it because like no she's she's not. I guarantee she is. She's dying. Because I'm watching like, Debbie does Hank the Pony one, and there's like 30 of them over there.

So she's coming back for more. I don't know what to say. In my experience, if you bottom out, that is not a good thing. Right? There's never a woman... You never encounter a woman who's like, oh yeah, keep hitting my cervix, just like that. Like really hard and don't let up, you know, even faster.

That's not true, actually. Like for some women, I've found that it's really painful. And they're like, whoa, whoa, that's not that. But other times I've found that they're like, whoa, like when that happens, they're just like, ah, yeah, that. That's never, yeah, do that. That seems more unique because I've never had that experience. It's always been when you bottom out, it's unpleasant. I've had it a couple ways, but unpleasant is the more common reaction.

Maybe. Well, I'm sure that that's the bottoming out. Where there's still another 13 inches of, you know, summer sausage. The worst part, some of the thrust, like, he would bottom out, and then he would just again like like just pushing her forward he was making new bottoms you know yeah lungs by the end of that it really seemed to be enjoying it um um but but but yeah that discovering that on the internet for the first time that was just a ridiculous shocker that

that even existed because that's really hidden away from the general public until you find that avenue of the internet and then you find that not only is this thing common but there's a big group of people who are into it and there's even groups of people who strive for to legalize uh this sort of thing and not sure what's real and what's internet myth but i think a guy did a similar thing and died of intestinal damage. I've seen that. I think I've seen it too. I think it's Mr. Hans, the video. Yeah, he dies. Oh, yeah, that's real.

Yeah. He fucks his organs, right? Just like a ninja blender. Just kills it. This is a full-sized horse that's fucking him. And I'm going to estimate its dick is like three feet long, and the base of it is a lot of dick It's it's a lot of dick and there it's like an arm And it has it seems to have this mechanism so that like flexes and can do that. Oh, it fucked him to death

It was horrible. I saw that when I was like 13 or 14 years old. I think it was one of the worst things online I'm picturing the thumbnail for this now That was one of the worst things online. I'm just picturing the thumbnail for this now. Oh, Jesus. The most upsetting one when I was young was just like the still image of a woman sucking a dog's dick that I accidentally got right up in front of me. When you're like 11 or 12, probably 12, let's be real, 12, that's an upsetting thing to see because that hasn't even crossed your mind as a possibility before of like, yeah, maybe there's some girls out there who like to suck dog dick. Who knows? I'm 12. No, that's just a whole new like, that what?

What's that red veiny fucking oh, that, oh. Every dog has one of those? Just hide? Oh, gross. Yeah, right? Yeah, dog penises. Not my cup of tea. Humans have the best looking penises of the entire animal kingdom.

We got it made. I think this thing looks better than anything the rest of those motherfuckers are packing out there. Most of them have this slimy red thing with a bone in the middle that comes jutting out, all moist and gross. At least ours is, you know, it's dry on the outside. There's skin on it. It's not an internal organ that's just coming out for right now. And then compared to apes and stuff, it's huge. That was big for your argument against Hank

or the faux vagina argument. It's dry on the outside. There's skin there. Very little seepage happening at any given point. Whereas with your vagina argument, I think you already... Show me the dirtiest dick in the world and I'll fix it with some soap and a warm wet washcloth. You cannot say the same for the dirtiest dick in the world and I'll fix it with some soap and a warm warm wet washcloth you cannot say the same for

the dirtiest vagina in the world yeah that's a platform I'll vote for you on show me the dirtiest gonna build a wall we're gonna clean all those dirty pussies we're gonna keep the brownies out it's gonna be great it's gonna be great it's gonna be wonderful the brownies god I just caught that I'm like I love brownies what is he talking about oh he's not he's not talking about desserts you know what i like brownies too that now that is not a a racial uh epitaph for mexicans or anything like that that's actually what my girlfriend's wiener dog calls brown weenie dogs because she's a red and those are there's that's the superior color. So she

calls the brown ones brownies. That's a racial slur against them. Her dogs are racist. Extremely racist against other breeds. It is a German breed, so she kind of thinks of herself as a monster race. I was talking to the dog the other day and I was telling her about how her ancestors during World War I would be messenger weenies and they would carry messages through the trenches because they could go under the barbed wire and such. What'd she say? I could tell she was getting real excited about it.

She was proud of her people and she was, I think she wanted me to look into her lineage so we're going to do that. She wants to know, I think. I think you might like bigger dogs. No, fuck that i like this little motherfucker right here that that thinks it's a tiger but i can like hold right here i never really respect small dogs that think that they're tougher than they are that's like you know this dog has the heart of a lion no it has the brain of a small dog it's but it's got

me as backup so it is that's that's that's how it always is that little dog he's with me he is the badass you fuck with him you fuck with me that's how it is for any other dog like that's my dog he's but no i would rather be on the receiving end of that equation where i have you know a rottweiler with me or something so if you fuck with me you have to answer to that you know that animal that I bring around with me. If it's like a little wiener dog, yeah, it'll be a fun little thing to have. But if you're going out starting shit, like Nate Diaz or whatever, you don't want to have a wiener dog in tow.

You want a pretty big... Yeah. I'll stick to my wiener dog. I'm not counting on her for protection or anything I'm counting on her for love and intelligence and cuteness and personality and she has all those and just the conversation

I have long conversations with that dog I feel like it's really easy I feel like you could do that with a big dog too or even inanimate objects like furniture and coffee tables I do that, I like having conversations with inanimate objects or less than sentient objects.

It's a lot more fun than talking to real people because I get to talk for them, so I get double the talking time. It seems way more efficient than a regular conversation. No more bullshit. It's all me. That interruption problem, solved. Totally.

Right? Done. That's great. At what age would you be proud that your hypothetical son had sex? I don't even know anymore. I know, right? It's such a weird question.

You could go two ways. You could go the 12-14 way like Taylor did and then the other direction. I feel like come college time, you're totally allowed to have sex right like yeah but i would want him to get it out of his system so he's not going through all of high school putting pussy on a pedestal and being doing dumb shit and thinking that like oh you know i got this one girlfriend and we love each other and we're just going to go off and live our whole life together even though we've only dated for like three months in high school like is really different for your daughter oh definitely yeah okay she will be kept on

a pedestal until her wedding night yeah ideally but probably not I think for the son I'm proud at whatever age developmentally he I feel that he's prepared if I see that he's a 12 yearyear-old who's like the fucking Fonz, and he's got all these 13, 14-year-old chicks hanging around him and talking about how cute he is, and he's the best-looking kid in this class, or whatever the thing may be. If he's the 12-year-old who's somehow getting pussy, and I feel like he's also mature enough to understand what's going on,

and I guess that we've had a safe sex talk. I guess 12 would be okay. But man, that seems so fucking young. It does, yeah. I was going to say 14 being the youngest I would go. I can't imagine lower than 14 being okay. Yeah. But if it's any older than like 20, it like come on get in the game what if he gets like what if he's what if he's 13 and he nabs some like 15 year old chick

that even you were like damn good job then i say you know uh yeah she'd come over but uh i gotta supervise. Yeah. You need me to pick her up, right? She can't drive. You can't drive. Why do I think you're a pedo in this scenario? Because I made my pedo eyes. And I'm staring longingly at a 15-year-old girl.

At what age is it the other side? At what age are you like, hey, get in the game? Honestly, I think like... That, once again, comes down to them as a person, too. It does come down to them as a person, but I think like... That, once again, comes down to them as a person, too. It does come down to them as a person, but I think, you know, as long as...

I don't know how else to say this, but, you know, as long as your kid isn't, like, super ugly, I guess you would know if you had an ugly kid. Like, you're just like, fuck. You can tell. You're looking at your wife like, I ought to slap you right in the fucking mouth, because this isn't me.

You know this isn't me. Look what your guard taught! What did you do? Did this family..., I ought to slap you right in the fucking mouth, because this isn't me. You know this isn't me. Look what your guard did to us. What did you do? Did to this family. Was it when I went to Hawaii to surf? With my brother? Why did you fuck that ugly son of a bitch? Wow.

What'd you do? What'd you do? Fuck Steve Buscemi, you whore. Can you press the button, Kyle? But yeah, as long as there's not a situation like that. I think if he's like 18, he's leaving high school and he hasn't figured this thing out and gotten himself a girlfriend that he could, you know. Maybe I don't know what's going on at that point.

Or maybe he's a year longer than that into college before it was like. What are you doing? Asking him every day? Hey, boy, did you get any pussy yet? No, dad. It's so nasty. I saw it. But like Kyle said, it's a filth box.

You're going to fuck it and you're going to like it. You stick your dick in that Petri dish, boy, and you like it. I feel like you report to me. Tell me how bad it was. Yeah, I really give it's past 22 or so. like it. And you come back here, you report to me, you tell me how bad it was. I feel like if it's past 22 or so, he probably wishes he had sex, and I'd like to see him have some success by then.

I think past 14, we all wish we had had sex already. Right, but at 14, if you haven't had it yet, you're fine. Oh, yeah. At 14, you're fine. Yeah, yeah. At 14, you're fine. Yeah, you're fine.

But you wish you'd had some sex. Yeah, you wish. As a guy, when you're 14, that's all you're thinking about. But if you hit age 15 and you're still a virgin, you're not like, oh, Jesus. It's like, you can't even drive yet, dude. You can't do anything. Chill out. I can remember in the fifth grade thinking that, like, I really want to play with miss harrison's titties she's got some big fucking titties and miss harrison

was kind of like a monica lewinsky type like brunette maybe like 25 pounds overweight but she had some fucking knockers and me and she and i would always talk about x files because as a 10 year old i watched x files and as like a 35 year old woman so did she and we would discuss the episodes at school and uh and i was just always just staring at those titties because she would just have them right in my face and i wanted to grab those titties so much and i still remember i still want to grab those titties miss harrison if you're out there you must be 50 by now and i'm down no you do not those things are hanging down like fuck that oh i'll find them i'll get them up here you'll find them around a here interesting like very few vaginas

pass kyle standard yet seemingly all boobies are good um i just want miss harrison's boobies because i doubt they're way down there i'm sure they're they were real nice right fifth grade fifth grade so i was 10 you hit puberty no No, I seriously doubt it. I was definitely interested in sexual stuff before puberty. I definitely liked the ideas of titties. And I remember hearing about kids getting molested and thinking, like, I wish Miss Harrison was a child molester. I swear to God, I remember thinking that because that's what parents would scare you with. They'd be like, look, there's people out there that'll get you, and they'll torture you, and they'll molest you,

and they'll do bad things to you, and they'll touch you where you're not supposed to be touched. And I remember thinking, like, wish you'd touch me where I'm not supposed to be touched. I remember I definitely had sexual thoughts before I hit puberty, and I can remember, like, in my head, like these imaginary conversations where part of my pitch

for having sex would be I can't even get you pregnant like dude I've never ejaculated let's do this you know you're safe it was in my head that was one of the attractive qualities about me that I that you couldn't get someone pregnant just by virtue of being so immature. So not, not. Yeah. Yeah. It was like, you know, look,

I'm a really nice guy. I'm fairly cute. I can ejaculate. These are all the things women like in fourth grade. I remember like the first, I even, I talked to my mom or my dad about it. Like after school one day where it was the first time I sat down and I

noticed my fourth grade teacher had big, big tits and just sitting there one noticed my fourth grade teacher had big, big tits. And just sitting there one day in fourth grade, I couldn't focus on spelling or state capitals or whatever the fuck. And even in my head, I was just like, why can't I stop looking at these? Like, what is it about? What is this? Like, why can't I stop thinking about this? And I had to ask my dad or mom later that night when I was, like, I guess nine, being like, I can't stop looking at Mrs. Smithson's breasts

when she's in school, when she's teaching. Like, that's very normal, Taylor. You're going to notice that continues throughout the rest of your life. I'm like, all right. And so it has begun, my son. That's awesome. I would just leave that conversation giggling with Jackie. Yeah.

Well, it's confusing at the time when you just see something and it's like a puzzle where it's like i something about that is really great and i don't know why like i don't get why that's good it's interesting like you know you can almost think back to when you discovered your heterosexuality like you know it probably was around fourth grade my father used to have uh playboy magazines and i had a great interest in them i i didn't even know what the scoop was or like but i knew that was for me yeah i can remember this is a weird memory i remember in the second grade uh a boy named michael who was also my age he was like i remember seeing on the playground

and being like let's get them girls and tie them up and whip them and me being like what the fuck are you talking about man yeah let's tie them up and get some of these long pieces of grass and whip them let's whoop their butts and me being like oh that'd be weird i'd rather play spaceman over on the blacktop i thought we'd play tag you know i i know there'd be any like bondage bondage. Yeah, BDSM involved in this thing. I still remember that. And that was kind of bizarre. And I just couldn't understand the...

That is bizarre. Why I would even be... But I remember that now. It was a weird day. Second grade sucked. We didn't have a real playground. We literally went outside in the parking lot on asphalt. Like, we played on the asphalt.

And, of course that that lets you get asphalt chalk out or whatever and there's a number of things games you can make using that but still did you have a brick wall we used to play suicide all the time is that a game that everybody knows i don't remember all the games there were a bunch of them um there were a bunch of boxes that you could move around and i don't i don't remember all the games there's a lot of duck duck duck, goose. We got playground equipment the next year. With Suicide, you throw the ball against the wall,

and if you catch it, then the guy who threw the ball has to run and touch the wall while you get an opportunity to throw the ball at him. If you fail to catch it, then whoever picks it up throws it at you, and you're safe once you touch the wall. So some people would zigzag to the wall, some people would just get there as quickly as they could. Oftentimes they'd miss while they tried to hit you, but every so often they'd peg you good.

And there wasn't really a lot of advantage, if you're following the rules, to catching the ball unless you're sure. Like if it's this big pop-up that's coming to you, grab the ball and get the thrower, the guy that threw it so poorly. But most of the time, it's a big freaking mess, and everyone is trying to catch the ball,

like women trying to catch a bouquet at a wedding. So you're much more likely to just get a fingertip on it. And sometimes two or three people would just take off to the wall, and it'd be easy to pick one off. Suicide was a good game. I've played that game before. No? Yeah, it's brutal.

No, I have. Oh, you have. Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know it was called Suicide, but yeah. What did you call it? I don't remember. I think maybe just Wall Ball. But, yeah.

All right. Oh, new information about the election. All of the candidates now say they will back Trump if he is the nominee. Good. I guess we're trying to limit the politics talk, but it seemed like this crap of lining up behind Romney and such just wasn't a representative democracy anymore. And please, viewers, don't tell me that, like, the Republicans and the Democrats aren't part of the government.

Like, I know that technically there's no law telling them how they select their candidate. But in effect, people vote for who the candidates are, and then they go up against each other. And when people don't vote for who the candidates are anymore, then I feel like we've taken a step backwards. It's not the right thing. The headline here says, Trump deflects Fox questions, rivals fail to capitalize in Detroit.

I just got Taylor's video back. How about you, Kyle? Have you had it for a while? Yes, I've had it for a while. Oh, yeah, I've been able to see myself in this little small screen for a while. I thought've been able to see myself i in this little small screen for a while i thought you could see me i don't know what went wrong but i'm happy to have you hey welcome back hello so i saw that there was a trump rally and uh i think it's like me

early in march um uh in fayetteville north carolina i kind of want to go to one like like i just want to experience like because I keep seeing them on TV, and it looks like a real good time. Like, first of all, you get to see Donald Trump do his thing in person, right? Great entertainer, regardless of what you think about him. And then you get to be part of that crowd. There will be protesters at the Fayetteville thing. If you're there, you'll get to see them drug out.

You'll get to see Trump go, get him out of here. No, keep his coat. Don't give him the coat. You know he did that, right? Back in the winter? I believe. Today, he was in Maine, which is why I thought you were going to say Maine. And the people start protesting or whatever.

And he's like, bye-bye. Bye-bye. And then he starts praising. Oh, man, the police here are great, aren't they? I really like the police. And he just goes on for a little bit. One guy does one thing suddenly all police are bad they don't see the great job that the bulk of the police are

doing police are really great getting the police vote i'm sure he should have done what bernie did and just collapsed completely at the first sign of them wanting to speak at his own speaking engagement would you like a mic you know i've seen so i've seen it happen so many times um that now today i heard him commenting on how he throws them out now he's like you know I used to be a lot more he's like you can't be soft with these people you can't be please will you leave please please no

because then you're too soft and you're like a soft you look ineffective but then you can't be like get him out of here because then you seem like this big jerk that wants to kick people out and boss people around so now I just say please kick people out and boss people around. So now I just say, please get him out. And so, yeah, please get him out.

And so you hear him dragging these people out. He kicks out two people within five minutes of each other. Like 30 seconds into his speech, get him out of here. Five minutes later, another. We got another protester. Oh, you want a little TV time, huh? Get him out of here. So even Bernie's turning him away now. here five minutes later another oh we got another protester oh you want a little tv time huh get him out of here it's so even bernie's turning him away now i want to go he was talking about trump

just there though yeah oh you were okay yeah it's trump doing that um so i think i want to go to one of these trump rallies and just see the spectacle see the show uh that would be fun yeah and you see crowds of like i think in al Alabama he had 35,000 people there. That's more people than go to watch a Braves game or something like that. He's filling stadiums with people. I saw a little thing on Reddit today, and of course the Donald subreddit is ridiculous,

but they were showing a picture of a Kasich rally, a picture of a Rubio rally, and they continually get to larger and larger venues. Kasich has maybe 45, 55 people in a room, and of course you want to pack them in so it doesn't look scattered and sparse. Trump has a fucking stadium. It's full of people. You couldn't count them if you wanted to. In every other case, if you really stopped and went, one, two, three, four, five, you could count everybody there and everybody else's. Trump's got 35 fucking thousand people there. And it's just, I'd like to go and see that spectacle.

I keep wondering if there's something that will burn Trump, right? Like, you know, Trump, he said kind of famously now, I could kill someone and my guys would still support me. All right. That's not literally true. If he actually killed someone, I think he'd, you know. What if they had it coming? Then his numbers would go up. I'd be for it.

If an assassin came after Trump on stage and he fucking like just broke the guy's neck. Instant win. Yeah. Instant win, right? Oh, my gosh. Everyone would love that. That's how you handle him. Right there.

What do you think Obama would do if he's up here? Huh? What would he do? Is Hillary going to find something his current candidates couldn't seem to quite use against him? You know, like, what about his adultery stuff? I guess she can't use that, right? No, because she is not on the right side of that either. Yeah.

Shit, I don't know what you use. I can tell you what she's going to use. She's going to play the Vagina card ad nauseum. Oh my god, that would so lose me. Mr. Bain Capital himself today went after Trump on his

bankruptcies. I thought that was so absurd. This guy, I don't know why they thought Romney was the mouthpiece to use for this message mccain would have been a much better option i feel like um or fuck i don't know dig bob dole up anybody but fucking romney mine as well have like been like oh i heard trump's not very nice to his dogs either not very nice to him you know everything he said about trump was something that he had done as well. Issues with his bankruptcy, issues with the way he ran those

bank capital, the way he's ran businesses in the past. That's all stuff that's been used against him. And of course, I was surprised how much Fox News went against Mitt Romney in that moment. Everybody was like, too little, too late. Why are you even talking

about this? You're the guy. You represent failed ideas. You're the guy who can't get it done. And you're coming out here saying, oh, this guy's unelectable. You are unelectable. And the numbers show it. It's clear. There's no reason that you shouldn't have beaten Obama in 08. He was as weak as he was ever going to be. You had your chance. And look at the, you just threw it away. You threw it away with all but 49% comments. All the, he just seems like such, tell you what, Romney's worth $150 million. 250 I think. I read it today. Who knows with these things. But you know, what's the difference in the grand scale of things?

A couple hundred million. The guy's worth $150 million. Trump's worth, let's just call it $3 billion. He's definitely worth that much, right? But which one really screams a stiff, old, rich guy to you? It's not Trump. It's Romney. Romney's the one who feels like the old, stiff, white cracker rich guy that you couldn't have a drink with. Trump feels more personable,

more real, more human than Romney. Trump comes from real estate and construction, right? This is a guy who drinks beer. Romney drinks wine. I've never felt, and I felt like it was a big problem with Romney all along. Every time he's ever ran for a presidential bid I know

he didn't make it to pass the Republican past Republican field the first time around but it seems like a stiff and I told it to my dad they were we were driving back from Home Depot and I was like when I think of Romney I think of an old stiff and then I read Trump calls him a stiff like like like later that day yeah Romney he's not going anywhere I feel like Romney, he's not going anywhere. I feel like Romney, remember when Bobby Jindal, so Obama had like this State of the Union, and Jindal was selected to be like the Republican Obama, right? He's a minority, he's a guy's Indian. He was popular, he was a fresh governor in Louisiana, I think,

and he goes and delivers the State of the Union, he sounds like kenneth the page in the whole thing he was just fucking brutal listen to he was so bad and uh he killed himself with it um shit where am i headed with this was it romney talk i lost my train of thought so sorry anyway um picking or making a bad candidate? Yeah, I guess. They picked the wrong guy. Romney is tough to listen to. He has no gravitas.

And that being said, I think if you're a Republican and someone who identifies not as a conservative necessarily, but just as a Republican, I think you've got to take a good long hard look at the last time you won at the highest level. And it goes back to George Bush, George H.W. Bush, the first time around. Since he lost his re-election,

you haven't won anything. You put your hopes in him, you put your hopes in Dole, you put your hopes in McCain, and then Romney. Why aren't you counting W? Do you really want to count W? Yeah. Well, I mean, he's gone now too counting W? Do you really want to count W? Yeah. He's gone now too. Do you think you could bring him out there? I saw someone insinuate

that you bring W out there. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. They say make America great again. And I'll admit there are things we could do better. I was talking earlier tonight about how we seem to be open trade to us but it's limited on the way out.

There's issues. But for the most part, you look at what's happened during Obama's turn. Like, oh, no, we won two wars and wrapped those up. And isn't it terrible that unemployment is at 20-year lows? And gas is $25. Oil is $25 a barrel. I'm paying $1.75 at the pump right now. Unemployment is low.

The stock market is doubling. All those unemployment stats, I actually did some research into that, and it's pretty misleading what they're trying to pawn off as unemployment being so low now. What's happening is that, sure, people are getting more jobs than they were when it was a complete shithole, but these aren't good jobs. These aren't't high quality jobs for most of these college grads it's shit to your jobs because the people 20 25 years older than them 30 years older aren't retiring and getting out of their positions it's an opening up a little bit of a upward mobility flow for people and i guess my generation and younger to get into the workforce and have some

opportunity like it's we're just, people my age are getting, like someone I know who was unemployed two years ago now has a job. It's like maybe some bullshit dead-end sales job. Like there's no move up. This is the same thing I've been hearing since the 80s. You know, like, hey, I just came out of college and I don't have my dream job yet. It's like I have to work my way up. Well, that's also disingenuous because the economy then was infinitely better.

The entire dot-com boom, the tech boom, everything there. I'm talking about before then. I said 80s. Oh, okay. I was talking about the 90s. Whenever – I'm saying that it's worse now than it was for the generation before myself, before Kyle. than it was for the generation before myself, before Kyle. The thing is, the unemployment rate is the metric that we've been using for like 200 years now.

And then suddenly when the unemployment rate looks good, they're like, no, there's another metric we should be using instead. People who don't have their dream job. Or people who have been unemployed for a long time. Like if you're unemployed for something like four years, then you fall the thing it seems to me like that metric of unemployment it's oh it's not just like me right now that's calling into question the metric of unemployment it seems like it's every side when it disagrees with where they are currently like when it was you know this is fucking out of control democrats would be like well you know this this is really it – it's dramatizing it.

It's making it look a little crazy. Really, it's more like this. And now Republicans are seeing it lower than they would like. And they're like, oh, this is horseshit. It should be. Realistically, it's way higher than that. Regardless, though, it is a shit time to be a young adult looking for a good career path. Unless you have very specific criteria if you're if you do what

you did and you go into the world knowing i want to do this with computers or this with that then it's going to be a lot easier if you just kind of want to not fuck around but try different trades and try different things and see where what you enjoy doing in the business world for the most part it is harder to get a foothold unless you know somebody. I guess that might be how it's always been. Yeah, that's how I feel. It sucks. To a lesser extent.

When I was first putting my resume together for the first time, I'm like 19 years old or something, and I'd see these sample resumes in mine. I was like, how do I make a good resume if I don't have all that shit to put on my resume? I'm trying to figure out how to make retail on a boardwalk store look good to a potential employer. And the examples are like increased sales by 30% across the Northeast region. I'm like, I didn't do that. Yeah. Sold six flip-flops on a Tuesday afternoon.

That's really good for a Tuesday. flip-flops on a Tuesday afternoon. That's really good for a Tuesday. And here I am at like 19 years old in 1993 or something like that, 92, hearing how the reason I can't get a job is because some guy at 70 isn't moving over for me. He needs to get out so everyone can move up and make a spot for me. I've literally been hearing that for over 20 years it's and that's possible i was a few years old in the early 90s so i don't remember that and that's a distinct possibility yeah i think it's fair i was three but i don't recall

um it's just i don't know i don't know It could also be like it's being drilled into people in their 20s, maybe early 30s heads now, and things like Reddit and these online communities where if you spend too much time there, or even just looking around, everybody's agreeing with each other so much that it'll be like, oh man, my dad got a job at a fucking boot heel factory in the early 80s,

and now he makes 230 grand a year where's my fucking opportunity and then everybody else is like yeah fucking up vote that my dad's successful too and i don't have what he has and so it almost convinces you i'm kind of turning myself around here right now but like it and there there is a truth that if you go back a couple of years like 2000 i don't know maybe I'm making this up, but like 2009 and 2012, the economy was recovering, but the jobs weren't. Like profitability was coming back, but jobs weren't.

That's the period that Sanders kind of targets when he says the rich are getting richer and everyone else is fucked. Not lately. You know, if you look at the jobs right now from like 14 to 16, 2014, 2016, wages are going up, employment is getting better. Like, companies have started hiring.

They've been making money for a little while, they stopped getting gun-shy about giving people raises and stuff, and suddenly there's a competitive market to have good employees that it just was delayed because at first the companies made money and they didn't hire right away. So, I don't know. It's always been

tough to get a good job when your resume is just getting started that's also a thing i think is that it's like it's so much more difficult to go into at least like a career path job not saying that you're working 40 hours a week at you know radio, like you're working for a real company that you think you have a future in. It's so much harder than college, which you've been told by everybody in high school was going to be the hardest thing ever. And then you get to college and you're like, oh man, all this study and so much more than high school. This is crazy. Couldn't be. And then you finally graduate and you move on to a real job. And even that, that is so much more demanding and difficult than school ever was, or at least for me it was uh and that's like a wake-up call almost as if like

is everybody else experiencing this no they can't be like i'm the one who's doing a really hard job or i'm the one who's kind of getting screwed over you know like it's easy to rationalize when you're in a position like that to set up the the board against you when i first started working you know in here i worked like 8 to 6 or something, right? It was 8 to 6 and you get an hour long lunch break and I'm like, oh my god. Only in school is 12 credit hours considered full time.

How nice that was. I took like 15 credit hours when I went full time and I had no classes on Friday and it seemed like I had about, what, 4 hours a day in classes, Monday through Thursday, something like that.

Four or five. Yeah. Yeah. Four or five, four or five hours for, you know, and of course they're studying and things like that. So one thing about work is you do kind of leave it,

leave it. Oftentimes like you can actually be fully done depending on the job, but, uh, where school is always haunting you, you know, you can't watch a movie without knowing that you're supposed to be doing something else yeah that's true but um uh anyway yeah it does

work it's just a lot more hours than school is yeah can we uh can we watch this uh clip here yeah let me queue up at zero it's 30 seconds i just pretty much spent the last 15 minutes arguing myself into a different position are we ready? I'm afraid someone here is playing through their speakers we'll see ready set play

I would like to take that back he's really not that much of a lightweight and as far as I have to say this he hit my hands nobody. He hit my hands. Nobody has ever hit my hands. I've never heard of this one. Look at those hands. Are they small hands?

And he referred to my hands. If they're small, something else must be small. I guarantee you there's no problem. I guarantee it. Okay. I'm moving on. I'm moving on.

This is a presidential debate. Trump style. I wish that he'd made an offhanded remark that suggested that Rubio had a little dick. I was like, I don't know about you, but no problems over here. And then maybe make a comment about how many women he's fucked. There's plenty of people you could ask you can ask Megan tell him

he's got a Marco penis man Megan Kelly's looking so hot I I swear her makeup looks excellent tonight she's got kind of a contour thing going on. I don't think so. But yeah, all night looking real good. Looking real good. Yeah, Megyn Kelly is... She turned into a beautiful woman.

Yeah, I'm going to have a little Megyn Kelly time after we get done here. Yeah. And there's nothing she can do about it. Not a damn thing. It's got her picture taped on the back of that auto blow with those googly eyes on it. And, you know, it's shaking so much. The googly eyes are shaking.

So it kind of looks like she's winking at me. Yeah. You don't have to tell me. I would. It's just like mine. So mine's Emma Watson, of course. I made a few alterations to mine mine i had to kick it up a notch get a little more power in there i saw a chainsaw the other day that had like a buick v8 attached to

it on the internet did you did you see this this thing was outrageous i've seen him with motorcycle engines it's crazy let's get a car engine on it can you you lift it? No. No. It's just like, watch us saw this log. We're like, yeah! I watch them with the motorcycle engines, and basically each side has, like, handlebars. So there's two people, you know, each grabbing, like, the thing. And then it cuts through the wood at the speed of gravity. Yeah.

It's just like, zoom! But much more manly. Have you ever seen the extreme lumberjack challenge thing they do that thing where they climb the tree with the spikes and the rope there's a chopping competition, a sawing competition that's pretty entertaining

I like the chainsaw one, they go down, up and down and it's just so fast I could hardly move my arm that fast I would be so worried about splinters or something awful like that, it looks like it's just so fast. I could hardly move my arm that fast. I would be so worried about splinters or something awful like that. It looks like it's a real rough... Oh, splinters does sound like an awful axe injury.

Yeah. Sliding down those trees. They practically jump from the top. Yeah, they go down at the speed of gravity. And another little alternative sport that I think I've seen on the same network is like the dog the pedigree like dog challenge or whatever it is Purina where they have like

dogs compete in challenges like long jump That sounds cool Oh it's really cool so there's like certain breeds of dogs are really good jumpers so they do this thing where they use it the dog sprints towards its owner and the owner is like running with a toy and then it throws it in such a way that it motivates the dog to jump out over the water, and then they measure the jump.

They've got it recorded so they can get the camera. What does a winning dog look like? Is it like a Weimaraner, like a short-haired sort of greyhound-y type thing? I always see labs and stuff, but I don't watch much of this. I've seen it three or four times throughout my life. It's pretty cool, though. I can probably find a video of one of the dogs jumping. They jump so far.

Your girlfriend breeds dogs? Or her family breeds dogs? Her and her mother do that. Okay. Is she still involved in it? Yeah, she owns several of the dogs, but I don't think she's involved in it as much as her mother would like. Because she's

living here. And I think at some point we're going to end up taking on some of those other dogs. Oh. Chiz wrote something about the elections. People sure want to hear this. People are saying Kasich did the best tonight and Trump doing the worst on most of the sites I've been checking.

I personally agree with that. He gets torn to pieces when you press him to explain any of his policy issues. They brought up his time off the record recording about I'm not going to build a wall or deport those people. So. No, they keep bringing up that he said that but but that hasn't been released it's like they're asking him to prove uh um even if it's true like i feel like yes it's known there's a trump classic and a trump zero and they're not the same. He used to be a Democrat. Like, literally, he was a Democrat. And, you know, like, if you're looking for someone who's always lined up with the positions that Republicans endorse, like, let's be anti-gay, let's be pro-choice, let's be, you know, economically free trade and I don't know what else, pro-war, then Trump's not going to have those positions dating back to the 80s.

He switched around. I feel like everyone's like, yeah, I know that. I chose him anyway. That's not news to us. So we'll see how it goes. I'm trying to find a good video of these dogs jumping, but most of the videos are like 45 minutes long and shit.

I can't imagine watching 45 seconds of dogs jumping around. I watch the stupidest stuff. What do you watch on YouTube lately, Taylor? Oh, I go through such dumb dumb things, and I couldn't even make fun. One of my steadfast just will always be there, always has

been there, is I will try and find every video available of monkeys fighting each other, especially monkey fights. I have seen every monkey fight video available on YouTube. Bears fighting other bears or other animals, and then strength

tests between different kinds of animals. I can't tell you the number of times that I would just get back from a bar in college, be blackout drunk, wake up the next morning and be like, you just got home alone and stayed up all night? What were you doing? Check my internet history, and it's like four hours of gorilla fights off snakes. Bear defends against gorilla. Just awesome stuff like that.

Animal videos are the way to go. Check this out. This is the perfect video for us. All right. I'll start over. Ready, set, play. All right. There's a dog.

Look at him. I just wish my dogs would sit that well. Huzzah! my dogs would sit that well. 25 feet. I feel like you should have got more altitude on that jump. We'll see how he does. Up owl dynamic. Lazy bitch. What is he? Yeah, it's like me, baby. This is the kind of dog I thought would do well.

Not messing around. Look at his trajectory. Look at his squirrel-like flight. Aww, what'd he get? What'd he get? One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty Look at how many people give a fuck about which one of these dogs is going to jump the front. Oh, I'm sorry, boss! Oh, of course, the black dog struggles. Swift! Yeah, how is it that the black dog couldn't jump?

I'm gonna get it! I'm gonna get it! Oh! Oh! Oh, he's still... I really wanted him to catch it. I wanna see these grumpy... Oh, another black dog that can't jump.

Yeah, that dog sucks. I wanna see these slightly overweight, grumpy middle-aged women who are training these dogs have a jump off. Whoa! Three feet! This dog doesn't even need a toy. He just likes jumping. Yeah, he knows what's up. I wonder how my dogs would do.

Well, they probably wouldn't be trained. They probably would not fail to jump off. Have you ever seen them swim? No. probably would not fail to jump off have you ever seen them swim no that would be interesting to see what they're swimming yeah they're cool dogs like i like that they're a little athletic it's not usually something i really value in my dogs but every so often because they have like maybe we have this um invisible fence like electric fence invisible though it's the radio kind and um they have about seven acres and every so often they'll like turn it on they'll be like you know what i

feel like just galloping and you know a great dane runs about 35 miles an hour and they just go it's pretty neat to see are you familiar with mr skin..com? Yes. Great website. They recently had their award thing that they do every year. So they have all these ridiculous awards that they've invented for nude celebrities in film. Great website. The guy who runs it and has always ran it was on The Stern Show. He goes on there once a year and does an interview. Always good stuff. So what would this year's award winners be?

Let's see. They have lots of ridiculous awards. There's one for Best Back Burger. There's Best Sex Scene with a Teddy Bear. I think Sarah Silverman got that one. I think they made that category just for her. They're all silly categories. That's a thing.

I don't see like... Oh, Anatomy Awards. Here we are. Yeah, I'm looking for... Oh, it's all video though. I really wanted the text version. I feel like... What is this going to be? That's a one minute video?

Hmm. I feel like I can't share this on my channel. No, probably not. There's a lot of awards though. I just don't know how you access them. Yeah. Like I heard them talking about this and they said it was free as well. Maybe you have to log in. I don't know how you access them. I heard them talking about this, and they said it was free as well.

Maybe you have to log in. I don't know. Yeah, I'm not logging in somewhere. I don't really want to join. This is a really popular site, though. Apparently, they've got great content. They pour through every bit of content that's created every year,

and they dig for the most... Any nude scene, they go frame by frame, and they dig for the most you know any nude scene they go frame by frame and they you know they look for like nip slips and all kinds of stuff that you didn't even know was it was a thing and you could search any actress and go back and find her nudes from before i wish that when i was like 17 or 18 they told me that jobs like this were available you know like hey you know what you could find a niche in, like, mainstream movie sex scenes. Catalog them for people.

I feel like that's a job that came into existence and then there was, like, one or two guys who knew the guy who started Mr. Skin who got in on the ground level with this and now there's still the two guys who watch movies and try to find nudity.

There's no way. He talked about all this. What did he say? He's got men and women. There's a lot of them. They comb through thousands of hours of footage. Everything that's made. He must be doing really well to have a staff of people

watching these movies. Yeah, yeah. He is doing very, very well for himself. They brought that up a bit. Yeah. He was talking about the neighborhood he lives in and how they kind of look down on him because they're all investment bankers and brokerage firms and they're all in finance and shit like that.

And he's the Mr. Skin guy. Well, they can suck a dick. He's new money. And then Mr. Skin will catalog it. That'll be that. Yeah. Well, I think that's probably a show, huh? Okay.

Yeah. All right. So PKA episode 272. Be sure to check out our sponsors. And if you don't mind, I'd love a rating on iTunes. Yeah, do that for us. See if we can get on the list somewhere. Yeah.

Thanks so much.