Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #304

Episode Date: October 20, 2016

This week on PKA, Filthy Robot returns and the guys put on one hell of a DRINKING EPISODE!

Welcome to PKA episode 304. I have something to talk about. Fuck! Fuck, I did this on the drinking episode. So, if you've ever used OBS, clicking preview and clicking record are right next to each other and they look the same. You don't have them hotkeyed? I don't have them hotkeyed. Anyway, I've been previewing for like, what, 90 minutes maybe? Yep. Let me tell you what we've been up to. I'm sure I won't get any fussing over this.

Well, let's all hit the breathalyzer. Just let the crowd know. So are we really starting the show right now? Yeah. We're kicking right into it. Okay, welcome. What episode is this? 304. Welcome to episode 304? We're kicking right into it. Okay, welcome. What episode is this? 304.

Welcome to episode 304 with sponsors Squarespace, NatureBox, Tracker, ZipRecruiter, and brand new sponsor Uber. We're going to talk more about each of them later on in the show. There are links down in the description if you want to check them out now. We have our guest Filthy Robot. We've been making a show for 90 minutes and drinking the whole time. We have. And we're all just a little bit tipsy And upset

I'm really sorry God damn it I'm really sorry This is so fucking frustrating We're all pretty, like a little drunk at least Well we'll see, we'll see how drunk we are So what we have is breathalyzers And what's left of Kyle's best effort This is apple moonshine That breathalyzers and what's left of Kyle's best effort.

This is apple moonshine that he made. Is that what it's called, Kyle's best effort? Well, it just says Kyle's day for a drink. All right, let's see where we are. So you're still good to drive, Kyle. Just barely. Kyle at.075. Kyle at.075. Me at.012.

Again? That can't be right. It could be. You know your liver processes this shit, right? Yeah, but... Wait, Kyle was.07? Five. Yeah, why is it so much higher than mine? Yeah, what the fuck? I'm at.012 and I definitely... I've drank enough to know

I'm drunker than that. Yeah, I don't understand. We're going to get pretty drunk tonight because we've got a show to do. It doesn't matter that you drank this much already. No, it's 90 minutes late on a drinking episode. Good luck. Filby's laughing at us. So yeah, the buttons, they look very similar.

Alright, another shot. Okay. Yeah, I like the way you're thinking. God almighty. Oh. Man, and I must say, the whole part of the dynamic of this show is that the spontaneous talking triggers other spontaneous stuff.

It's really hard to redo that. It's not like you're presenting. You can't use those jokes again. You missed the great story of me being retarded. It's not going to redo that. It's not like you're presenting. You can't use those jokes again. You missed the great story of me being retarded. It's not going to be funny. You do next time. All right, let's take this. We burned some solid material.

Yeah. Gone. Mistakes happen, though. They don't usually happen like that. Mistakes happen. You know what I thought was funny, though? That he typed that to us. Instead of just being like, we got a problem, guys.

I didn't record any of this shit. He typed it as if he was recording and didn't want anybody to hear him. He should have just been like, hey, guys, I got a real bad problem. I read it, and when I just read, I have a huge problem, I was like, oh, God, what just happened? Like, Woody's got to leave us.

We're going to have to do some sort of three-man Rick-a-mer-row here. But no, that's a different story. So where should we go with this? What did we lead off with last time? What was our first topic? Welcome to our guest, Filthy Robot.

To our guest, Filthy Robot. Yeah, that's what we started with. What a wonderful introduction. I've never quite had it said that way before. Thank you, Woody. That's a whole new meme for the rest of the thanks oh we talked about politics we spoke about woody is getting we can't just tell them what we've already talked about though

it's not much of a show if you had been here these are the things we would have spoken about funny moment when i accidentally called Filthy lefty, and then I joked that Filthy's only half the man that lefty is, but in a good way, and then everybody kind of laughed a little, but then felt bad. Because they were going by displacement. Of course. One thing we should mention again is the taste of this.

It is 15%, 20% alcohol or so. It is sickly sweet, very, very sweet uh that's how kyle wanted it to be i suppose like it's not bad it doesn't taste bad i'm just not used to drinking things with this much sugar so i can feel my tummy rumbling after drinking quite a bit of this because i've i've pretty much polished this whole thing off and then i've got this much left in my thing that i'm pouring it into a shot glass with so I don't make a mess I thought that you were ahead of I was like how did he finish it so I'm down to here it used to be full I took the seal off when we weren't recording yeah we're all around

the same area we're probably gonna have to go get more boobs cut it off like pop the seal like everything was very well done for you guys you won't know it but you know if you were curious but it was all above board you know all right all right can i run out i gotta say i don't know if i can't run out i don't know if my viewers would buy it if i'm like yeah i'm doing a drunk stream and i started my bottles empty you know i already had this on board i just don't know if they'd buy it well we've got well we have the breathalyzers going so there's that yeah but yours you keep blowing and yours doesn't change i just took, three extra shots, because the last two times I've blown have been.012.

So if it comes up as.012 again, this $75 breathalyzer is fucking broken. And so that would be... That's the one, next time you get pulled over, you're like, Officer, can I please use my own breathalyzer? Because that one doesn't go up. No, no, no, you don't have to break yours out. I got it.

The audience is going to think I'm kidding. Woody dropped at least four N-bombs in the thing that didn't get recorded. He really did. He really did. It was in, like, the first 90 seconds. But it was in reference to the song Niggas in Paris.

Was it? Yeah. Yeah, I remember that second part. All right, so here's the question. We might as well just do this with everyone listening since we're fucking... Do we want to go back over some of the things

we already covered or do we have to go to fresh territory here? I think it's got to be fresh territory. Alright, I got a question. It's from the Patreon. At the $10 level on Patreon, you can ask questions and influence the show and stuff. I don't even know... And you get episodes early and influence the show and stuff. And you get

episodes early and stuff like that. Very early. I had one. Oh, what is a day in the life like for Kyle and Taylor? It actually says Taylor and Kyle, but whatever. That's okay. Well, Taylor and I like to get up early. We don't eat breakfast.

We love our brunch. He likes pancakes. I like fruit. We like to mix it up. So my normal day, I like to sleep really fucking late unless I have something that is a morning activity. My sleep schedule is I wake up around 11 a.m. to sometimes as late as 12, 30 p.m. after lunch.

But then I don't go to sleep again until you know 4 a.m or something like that um if but it's completely different i got something to do um does being nocturnal make you unhappy because that's what happens to me a little bit um well well i don't like the sun or like daylight activities like there's never like i don't frolic in meadows or like relish like you know getting a tan or anything so like i there have been those movies where like they talk about post-apocalyptic times when the dust clouds like go and it's a it's a it's a thousand year night and i'm like oh cool no sunglasses huh all right i guess we'll all have cool night vision goggles right and we'll have like some sort of vitamin d. It doesn't sound too bad.

So yeah, I don't miss the sun very much. I don't like getting in the sun. I don't like the sun's harmful rays. I'm always wearing sunscreen, even though I usually stay inside. But in a normal day, it really depends. It's lots of errands. I have more errands than you can believe.

And I run a lot of errands for Kitty. So yesterday, for example, hour and a half with my lawyer, an hour with an insurance agent, an hour's worth of yard work, I would say. I had to break down a whole pile of cardboard boxes. I went and saw my dad, worked on a project that we're tinkering with over there that we've been working on for some time. Car? Did some... We've got a bunch of cars over there, but it's something else that we've been

tinkering with that I just wouldn't say publicly. I'll tell you later if you want to know. Okay. So yeah, we tinkered over there for maybe two hours. My mailbox got knocked over by some miscreant. Ah, karma. So I put that back up and, you know,

of course, put a bomb inside so next time they hit it, they'll die. Of course. Didn't really do that. Or the mailman. Yeah, whoever. And I cleaned up downstairs. That was my day yesterday. So, you know, they change

so wildly every day is different like like there's never there's not like a nine to five routine where like there's the same thing to do every day some days have like huge responsibilities where there's lots of pressure and some days it doesn't matter if i wake up or not to be clear you're selling patreon with this right that was what you wanted to use as your exemplar of why they want to ask questions for that kind of answer that kind of riveting response? That kind of look into your life?

So Tommy, you broke down boxes and did yard work? I guess I lost over the hours worth of masturbation. You've got to pay 50 bucks to get to that. Only one hour. Yeah, it was just not interesting. I assume it's the best part. Taylor is kind of a corporate life, right?

Like, you've got a day job. Not as strict as a traditional corporate life. It depends what time I have to go places, because I can do quite a bit of stuff from home. Every day, though, I do go out. It depends what time, what meetings I have to get to and whatnot. It depends on the client that I'm working with that day. And mostly it's, I'm usually out of the house before nine or so. And then I usually get back home. If it's like an easy day, I don't know. Like, that's the nice thing about it. It's

not like totally structured. There are some days where it's like, I'll have quite a few morning meetings I have to get done. And then from 1pm on, it on, it's like, I don't have fuck all to do. Like, I'm kind of just waiting for other people to get shit done and send it back to me. And then other days it'll be like, you know, I can wake up and not have anything to do until, like, noon, and then a bunch of afternoon meetings. And then, unfortunately, of course, there's shit where it's like,

oh, goddammit, I'm going to be working from 7 to 7 today trying to get shit done before deadline. But, yeah, other than that that it's just work come back home fuck around with video games and uh the internet and melissa and eating not exciting like i don't i don't even have as much free right it filthy made fun of fucking kyle's answer he's in a rip on mine because i don't even have the the excuses of like well sometimes you know it's a whole dice roll what we might end up doing at my compound like no it's like like there's a variation of things that I might be doing but it's it's all in the same industry it's all in the same realm so trying to fly out of my yard lately

yeah I've given myself permission for lack of a better term. But it's harder than I thought. And I don't want to drone on about paramoting. I know some people aren't a fan. But the nature of my yard is it's a bowl, right? So there's two ways that that's true. One is it's surrounded by trees and power lines, I should mention. So, like, the ground level is just a little lower than the wind level. And the wind has to, like, come in to get to me. And then beyond that, the lower than the wind level. Now the wind has to like come in to get to the,

get to me. And then beyond that, the ground's not completely level. So I was like, some of the best places to launch are sort of downhill. So I have to run uphill and I haven't successfully launched yet. It makes me really sad. Like more than you might guess,

like this is the whole objective. So, so what do you, I don't, I don't tend to, I haven't, I'm subscribed to your PKA Reddit, and I don't tend to visit there often, but I do occasionally catch a headline

or something. And there was a headline the other... maybe a month ago now, and I actually clicked on this one because I was a little concerned, just briefly, and it was like the Woody died in a paramotoring accident headline. And it was conceivable to me. I clicked on it, and I'm like, this could have happened. And I read it and I'm like, did this happen?

And I had to take a second to really process because that seemed reasonable to me. What you just described, yeah, it's a bit of a bull. There's some large trees and a power line. And I could see this. These seemed like they'd be related. And it looked like a CNN article or something if you clicked on it.

The thumbnail had a picture of... And it said exactly what it would say if someone from YouTube died they wouldn't say like Matt Woodworth died in this they would just say like famous YouTuber passes away in tragic vlog or something like that and that's what it was and so what happened was my friend's paramotor broke but because we're like friends with the distributor also, we try not to like put out a lot of bad news about the product he sells. So I had no footage. And we did it like all weekend.

So Monday came along and I didn't make a vlog. And I was really consistent with my vlogs at the time. So everyone assumed I died. And that was, you know, what else? Even some of us. I thought he died. Kyle thought I died too. You know, 50-50. Yeah.

We're dying. We didn't know exactly. Are you still enjoying it? Yes, I'm still enjoying it. Right now I'm temporarily frustrated. I've had a couple, like, failure to launches. You know, like, I'll go out there, I'll try, I'll try to launch, like, three times. And I'll be like, you know what? I think it's just wrong right now and it would be a bad

decision to push this. I could have launched, I'm sure I could have done something, but who knows how it would work out. If you feel like it might be dangerous then the culture and the right idea is you just don't do it. Have you thought of any serious landscaping to fix this dip, this dip, this bowl problem. It would be pretty serious, you know, to like take a section of the yard and it would be tons and tons of dirt,

you know, a lot. So, no, I didn't think of that. Although I guess it's conceivable at the moment. I'm just like, you know what?

I'm going to take a little more time. Think about the airstrips a little better and, and we'll watch the wind some more and see what's up. Maybe there's some directions, some wind directions I decide aren't the best day. And, you know, I've got better angles from this direction than that one. So I'm just taking time to learn. I'm also looking at, like, other people's properties and stuff so that I can have closer places to launch to in practice. And if I get more skilled, then more options open up. I think it's a gateway thing.

You think you're going to try for other kinds of flying style things, like any interest in gliders or hang gliding or any of the kind of solo style stuff like that, or no? It's interesting you said that, because other forms of aviation have started to catch my eye, but I don't want them them to so we'll see where that goes like paramotoring is cool in a couple ways like i really like that you can just put it in your car and launch from a lot of places i really like there's a community aspect to it

like i can go and visit another paramotor friend a para friend and uh and we can like launch by him or he can launch by me or we can go to like a third place and and that aspect of it i really love if i were to have like a sail plane for example like a plane with no motor yeah then like you know it's not that it's like this is the airport where i store it can't go anywhere else you always have to be able to get back to that airport um i like paramotors i think there's i think i picked a good one to finish with you you know, and the fact that I started there is pretty cool. But I do wish that I had been successful in launching from my yard. That's where I am. Kyle looking handsome.

Looking like a movie star just sitting there doing nothing. It's true. Thank you. Perfect hair. I'm a little drunk. I'm hitting on Kyle. Here we go. Yeah, I know, right? Not the first time either. That's how little drunk. I'm hitting on Kyle. Here we go. Yeah, I know, right?

Not the first time either. That's how I know. I didn't take offense to it at all. I was like, oh, Woody's a little drunk. It's time for him to hit on me now. He's just coming. You know what they say about the Kinsey spectrum. There's not just like homosexual and heterosexual. There's a wide spectrum. It is a spectrum.

You can be all kinds of gay so this is all that I have in the house to drink what is it? I'm out again I'm sorry this is all that I have I don't even know how alcoholic this is it's champagne oh nice I'm out again. So are you the salt this I'm sorry. This is all that I have It's champagne oh nice What do you call that a magnum of champagne or something? Yeah, it's twelve and a half percent So that's like pretty standard wine, but god damn it

Powered through this thing. This is not as alcoholic as i thought it would be see i gotta but it tastes much better than i thought it would i gotta just like it's just just set this up he's like i was a little worried because i'm like you know i've been taking it relatively easy with the drinking you know not like super overboard recently and chis is like yeah uh you know would you like to be on the street uh the the show tomorrow it's gonna be uh it's gonna be a drinking show everyone's gonna be drinking you know you're to be on the show tomorrow? It's going to be a drinking show. Everyone's going to be drinking. You're just expected to keep up style thing. I'm like, okay, yeah.

I'll handle that. I'm just a little worried in the back of my mind. I haven't been drinking too much now. But this is all you have in the house. You guys are out. You're done. We're like 20 minutes in. You're at the drinking episode.

Nope. We had lots of alcohol. Kyle, you're going to have to shoulder the burden because after I finish this bottle of champagne, I'm not going to have anything else. I couldn't have had something fucking worse. I already said how much, I guess I said it when we weren't recording to no one,

that this is just so sugary. You can see the sugar in there on the bottom, and that's what was kind of upsetting my stomach. The only alcohol I have is another super sugary you can see the sugar in there on the bottom like and that's what was kind of upsetting my stomach the only alcohol i have is another super sugary beverage of champagne like i just i wish i had some like bud light taylor were you down on the show when we had the wine sponsor i forget their name uh club w yeah oh you didn't get free wine out of that i didn't get any no they sent all the wine to me? What a terrible idea. So you just have a bunch of wine sitting there,

unopened, whatever. I've got a couple of them, yeah. Yeah, and like, look, I respect Club W and they're a great sponsor and I welcome you to come back, but I am so not into wine when the mailman rings on my doorbell,bell like what is this intrusion

you know like i don't i don't want wine you had to sign for it and everything of course uh i was curious about that anyways you sent that so i mean kyle you sent them each uh a little sampler of your that might be illegal no we all made it on our own if it's uh if it's legal to send a sampler then i did that but if If it's legal to send a sampler, then I did that. But if it's not legal to send a sampler, then they made their own and I sent them labels. Okay, so it was the labels. I was curious about that. I was just wondering how you managed to send it through the U.S. mail and how that worked.

There's packaging so you can select it. But, you know, they got it. That's all that matters. I found the recipe online last week and Woody's often talking about and I agree, I don't like alcohol either. I think I'm more willing to

fuck it and do it than he is, but still I find alcohol abhorrent most of the time. So I've had apple pie moonshine before. I'd never made it before. But I found a recipe, and it's just bunches of sugar and lots of alcohol and apple cider and apple juice. I think it's a lot of fun to drink

when you don't have to force down a bottle of champagne because you started the drinking episode two hours in. I really blame Filthy for that. When he's not on the show, that never happens. He comes on the show, and suddenly we're fucked. I wasn't even prepared for this. I've got every fucking alcohol known to man in my house, as well as about, like, ten different

friggin' sets of beer. It's just confirmed he was behind it all along. Yeah, there is only one independent variable in this. Yes! Well, that's to cover what he's asking Taylor I just I just gotta say from your fire in your shoes I would want to make totally totally sure that other people were feeling the same misery you are if you

have to drink that bottle of champagne which is a very gassy kind of unpleasant liquid to drink in large portions by yourself it really doesn't meant for celebration not just like social drinking or like, you know, like evening of drinking. You should really make sure everyone else keeps up. This is forced group drinking. All right.

No, I have to have that because Woody has guaranteed what he has. One of the club W wines. He can go grab whatever one he thinks is best. Kyle has many, many bottles of this. I'm going upstairs. here are the options i have uh some pbr got some 16 ounce uh pbrs upstairs i've got uh some captain morgan spiced rum i got about that much of a fifth left uh i got uh i'm sure there's some red wine and i think there's some sort of

british alcohol that i just don't understand how it works, so we won't open that. There's alcohol that you don't understand how it works? What's the name, Joe? I don't know. Yeah, don't get that one then. Maybe just get – Because all alcohol works relatively similar. Yeah, I know how it would work on me, but I don't know exactly what it is.

Why don't you just have another one of these? Well, because there's a lot of sugar. You'll get diabetes by tomorrow. My teeth are starting to hurt. I've got a question. Go ahead. I'm interrupting. I'm going to go grab the alcohol. Hold on. Just quick check.

We are recording, right? Yes. I started my own recording after that last one. You did not. I guess I could have been recording locally if you said. I started my own recording after that last one. You did not. I guess I could have been recording locally if you'd said. I would have done it. I've been happy to send it to you after. Ah, this overlays and shit.

I have a question for you. The last time you were on this show, we had some sort of debate. I remember it. It was on old money versus new money. And I said that new money oftentimes should be respected because they've done something notable to achieve it, etc. And I accused you of a straw man argument, like rephrasing my argument. Did you ever revisit that? Did you see that?

Or was it after the argument or debate, I guess you'd call it, it was just over for you? Because for me, we re-litigated that shit in the PKA subreddit for the following week. Can you guys say what it was again? Because I honestly don't remember what it was. In a nutshell. I remember. I'll lay it out there and you tell me if you have any corrections. I was saying that new money oftentimes is put down by society.

Old money is the good one to have. And I said, you know what? I think new money might be the good one to have a lot of times because they've done something notable to achieve that new money. And then Lefty was poking holes. I'm sorry. Who? Filthy.

Filthy was – Kyle did it. Filthy was poking holes in it saying like – I thought I was doing great. Like I've been working out all summer. Like I've been eating light. Like I didn't realize like clearly like what is it? Like the aspect ratio of my camera off tonight? Like what's going on here? Filthy, I'm on your team. your team you look great yeah you do look great it's fucking sexy so uh he was saying what

about the guys that invented facebook they do anything notable we said yes he said well what about like hedge fund managers did they do anything notable and then i was like you're rephrasing my argument to make it seem like i said all of them are great, new money and not some of them. And I'm wondering because for me, it was like this stress-inducing thing. A hundred fucking fucknards were like arguing one way and other people, there's time stamps into like what I actually said versus what I didn't. I was wondering if it impacted you after the fact at all or if you were just like, la-di-da, I'm out of here. A little bit of that, a little bit of the other. I've just recently in my channel gotten a lot of views for the Civ 6 stuff and some collaborations I'm doing.

So I'm getting a lot of new viewers to the channel. And one of the things that new viewers do is they post and they're not always my fans. So the tenor of the comments in my comment sections have gone to quite negative recently a lot of just like shit random like just shitting on me like and i'm like oh okay this isn't real pleasant to read so in some sense i tend to try not to read too many of those comment threads because it's just not good for my like mental well-being just like yeah okay like you get a lot of fans but you know if you're like me at all like the ones that stick out are like the shitty ones on you right the ones that are shitting on you are the ones that like stick out the most and you're just like so so some level of that like i too tend to scan the threads uh especially in a couple days after i'm on the show just to see kind of the

reaction for that so did i think about it much um i got a little worried that you kind of took it more personally than i would have meant like not like you were taking it super personally but in the sense that you seem more concerned about it than i was my point with always with things like that is to offer kind of boundary conditions on that right if especially with any sort of wide sweeping statement i want to be i want to poke those sweeping statements and go look yeah maybe in general we can agree with something like that but there are clear incidences outside of these outside of that for me and that was the point of bringing up what i did there so do i want to revisit it now? Not really. Am I being worried about it?

Not really either. If I was pushed and wanted to defend, would I want to be like, yeah, I wasn't offering a straw man? I probably would go that way. But I'd probably honestly just rather drop it and move on unless you have some strong reason for doing it. Oh, no. I'm not interested in re-litigating that at all. No, no. We are going to rehash this at length.

I'm going to go full Trump and just relitigate this and drag it out for as long as possible so that this new story never ends. In general, I like discussing things. I discuss things in a way that often comes off as debate or antagonistic and it isn't really that way for me.

I like thinking about the hypotheticals, gaming stuff out, looking at cases like that. I tend to enjoy that. often i'll engage with that because i enjoy it so i'll give you that too yeah yeah i uh yeah i'm trying to think through i don't want to relitigate it at all but it's fun but it's not fun to be wrong and a lot of times you don't know that you're wrong in an argument until someone says something really like poignant and it changes your mind and even more often you don't realize you're wrong in an argument until someone says something really like poignant and it changes your mind and even more often you don't realize you're wrong in an argument until maybe weeks months years later that you kind of mentally revisit it and be like okay i can really see

the perspective from which they were speaking i think i actually agree like i don't feel like debates ever actually solve in the moment like that you never actually will debate someone on a topic and they'll be like oh yeah you're right i do uh hate abortion or whatever the case may be right changed my mind i think that in the end we were both like yeah new money often does something pretty respectable it's just whether new money always does something respectable which was never my point and uh and i felt like i was like my point was mischaracterized as an always when it wasn't. I think we can all agree that there are some young whippersnappers out there coming up with some humdingers of ideas like Uber. Paramotoring.

Paramotoring. Not as big as Uber. Still a thing. I doubt that guy has any new money. I bet he has a whole bunch of new fan blades in his backyard next to a rotted out 74 Pinto. Paramotoring's popularity is exploding, right? The sport has gone from like 3,000 to 4,000 people. It's just that it's such a tiny group.

Yeah, most sports don't grow by a third in a year, right? But paramotoring is exploding. Move over, UFC. Here we come. Imagine if the NFL went from 300 million fans to 400 million fans. It'd be huge. That's what's happening in paramotoring. Yeah, yeah.

Kyle, what did you decide? Pardon me? What did you decide on to grab a drink? Yeah, yeah. So I got a half a gallon of the more of the moonshine. Kyle's best. Big bottle. And I got some Captain Morgan's rum because I'm considering just doing a shot or two of this

because I really don't want to drink a lot more of that sugar. I think that going for rum shots, let's do that for a bit. I'm going to blow my thing. Actually, I need to get some water and rinse my mouth out. Otherwise, it'll come out a little wonky. If we're doing shots, I'd like to join in. So I'm going to grab alcohol. I'll be back in just a minute.

And then we'll continue on. I have a headache. I really do. That do that's alright we're not looking to make love with you just drink with you so go grab some wine and we'll move on don't worry there's no penetration involved point oh three that's such horseshit. I feel like it just measures how recently you've had a drink. That can't be right. This can't be a scam.

I've drank this whole fucking thing. I guess I can kick it. Where's my... Now we're... I don't have a shot glass, which we explain in the unrecorded portion. All I have is this miniature vase, I guess. What is urine collection jar. Yeah. Mmm, last drop.

I bet there's some sediment in there. We're about to find out what's in this puppy. Oh, God. Hang on to it. We're going to all do a shot of this. Thank you for saying that because I'd hate to have to do a shot right after it. Yeah, no need to go by yourself. This will be fun.

It's just us, Kyle. Just you and I alone. Talk about private stuff, business and whatever. You and the others. They're not watching. They left. I'm going to give this another go. I've got seven seconds.

Live update. Down to five seconds now. My stomach is rumbling. Closing in on two seconds. And there's one. How come his isn't noisy? Did he mute himself maybe while he blew? Ah, he muted himself.

Yeah, I didn't want to be irritating. It's loud. Point 026. This can't be right. Yeah, I didn't want to be irritating. It's loud. Point zero two six. This can't be right. I guess I've got to start getting a little classier drunk. I will be right back. Oh, we're

going to... I'll be right back. Yeah, let's do a shot. Let's do the shot, and then you can... This is a fine champagne y'all all right i gotta i gotta house no it's not all right i don't i don't care for that one bit shooting some gin i would much rather have the champagne with the fucking rum you're shooting gin right now filthy after that 11 beer you're winning this night i thought that was the point of this night.

It is. I just, I really thought that one of these would get me pretty loaded. Yeah, we can hear. Can you hear us? Yeah, I can hear you. I was saying if Woody was doing it. No, Woody's wandered off. Hopefully he comes back. Yeah, but he can hear us. He just said. Oh yeah, just hit it.

Go ahead. Cheers, guys. Bottoms up. If nothing else, you guys can do another one as soon as it just said. Oh yeah, just hit it. Go ahead. Cheers, guys. Bottoms up. If nothing else, you guys can do another one as soon as it gets back. Oh, boy. I can already feel the moisture wicking out of my body from

all of that alcohol. I can feel my muscles getting dehydrated. I went out to tell my wife, just as I was grabbing a beer, she's like, take it easy. I'm like'm like well we had to restart the show um after 90 minutes and she kind of laughed at me and then uh i was talking about the alcohol you guys are drinking and uh and she's like she's like that will get him drunk and i'm like what are you talking about you've had two glasses of wine right now how do you feel she's like i feel pretty sober you guys have had just three glasses of wine that's what that is that's if it's 15 alcohol by volume and

it's 20 ounces that's essentially three three glasses of wine. That's what that is. If it's 15% alcohol by volume and it's 20 ounces, that's essentially three glasses of wine, right? In the course of two hours. That's definitely true. Two of those are gone. That means you have one glass of wine in you. Yeah. I just don't know if that's true. I just don't know.

I know that's like a rule of thumb, but I don't know if that's like the facts. I'm sure they rounded it. That's true. What do you guys weigh compared to my wife i'm so you're probably like 50 heavier than my wife right so it should be even less then i'm i'm sad for you yeah yeah if your wife i won't pass that one on she's a little dubious about the pka show as a whole as it is oh is she yeah she? Yeah. 1-1-5. Kyle, the first one to break into the 10th placement

on that decimal. Let's see that. 0.1-1-5. How are you feeling, Kyle? Are you feeling okay? I feel drunk. A little like a champion, Kyle? I feel drunk.

Yeah. Don't make that face. You should be happy to be drunk. It's never a happy drunk. I don't remember happy drunk. That never happens. I know on your Reddit, generally there's some fan who goes through and posts time spans about all the things that we talk about. I want to see on this episode for that, not only the time stamp, I want to see the blood alcohol stamp next to this too.

I think that would be fantastic. And what I want to see too is also we should do it. Maybe we should do it. We should find it. We should find a chart that looks at what these are supposed to be. So we know no driving. .08. Okay. What's.12? What is the next

milestone in your progress for tonight? We're going to say.20 is Mel Gibson. And that's what we have to try. We aspire to be Mel Gibson level drunk and that's.2. I don't know if to be mel gibson level drunk and that's point two i don't know if that's actually what he was at but that seems high as soon as i start ranting

about the jews again you'll know yes you guys missed that in the unrecorded portion of the show there were some things said too very anti-semitic remarks is that going to be patreon only or how does that yes well no we can't do it Patreon only, obviously. You don't want to bash Jews in something that's financially incentive. Pay to play. Yeah, yeah. Most of our Patreons are Jews, it seems. What does that even mean?

Nice work, guys. Nice work. I saw that Mel Gibson's film, Hacksaw Ridge, is getting really good reviews, and a lot of people are saying great things about it. And then I read this whole article about Gibson and how he's no longer persona non grata in Hollywood, I suppose. Even after his sexist

and anti-Semitic and racist comments. So I guess they've forgiven him. That shit was like ten years ago. Is he running for president now? No. No, he's not running for president, but he is making movies again. Didn't Roman Polanski rape a girl? Yeah, a little bit. And he still does stuff still does stuff right well they don't let him come back in the country well no but he can like direct a movie and then just like fedex it i think that's an addition

yeah but but i think that's an extradition he swaps it that's like saying a copy of the that's like saying edward snowden still tweeting right like you know he's like saying Edward Snowden's still tweeting, right? Like, you know, he's like, yeah, but if he comes home, we'll put him in a dark room and, like, shock his balls. Yeah. All the WikiLeaks stuff is interesting. That's not Snowden. That's Assange, right? I always get them confused because it seems like they did something similar,

except now one of them says they're a woman, if you didn't know that. I think that one is Edward Snowden, I think. Maybe he's transgendered. That's not true. Is Snowden transgendered? I don't think so. I think that one, Edward Snowden, I think. Maybe he's transgendered. That's not true. Is Snowden transgendered? I don't think so. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure.

If you could Google that, I'm like, maybe 30% on this. I'm going to do it with safe search. Safe search? No, I don't do safe search. Well, that'll do no good. I remember the first, like, I thought I was making out

like a fucking bandit when I would, like, Google bandit when I would Google tits when I was like 12 and just turn off the safe search and go to images and be like, oh man, look at this guy sliding through the defense posts on this. Nobody's going to discover when they type in B.

When they go to type in B for blues tickets next week, they won't come up as like big boobed whoever. I can't believe we lost nhl talk we lost we lost like hate speech talk we lost trump talk we lost politics talk in general you gotta let it go kyle you gotta power through and let it go the fact that i'm drunk a little bit or according to this i'm not at all i feel it though maybe it's psychological i'm doing the show but i i'm upset by that i wish we hadn't lost all that because as soon as he typed

i have a huge problem i knew nothing i've said has been recorded and i guarantee that all the things i've said from this point back an hour and a half is a lot more reliable than what i'm going to be saying at this point forward if i drink this whole bottle which i don't even know what to do about this champagne i'm between a rock and a hard place because if i guzzle all this champagne down i'll get drunk for a little while. But if I guzzle a bunch of champagne down, I'm going to feel horrible and I won't want to talk. And so – because I'm just going to be like, oh, remember that time? Taylor, you are a content creator.

You have people relying on you, fans counting on you. It's not about your personal feelings of how much pleasure or pain you get from this. This is about what you can do for your channel and for your viewers. I think, is there really even a discussion about whether or not you chugged that champagne right now? That's a good pep talk. Yeah, he's right. Chug, Taylor, chug, chug, chug.

I chugged the champagne. I'm not a savage. Is too. Dude. Not a savage. Cheers to you. Dude. I wonder why that is. I mean, okay, culturally. Like, my dad's English, and I grew up in a household where drinking was just,

I mean, I was at a family gathering with my wife's family not too long ago, and we were at a restaurant, and we were drinking, and I just kind of treated it like i would treat a family gathering with my own family which means that we were at that restaurant like three or four hours and they were drinking these mixed drinks and they were nice mixed drinks i guess you know like they're like martini like martinis and cocktails and this type of shit and it looked kind of nice and i tried one the problem i always have with mixed drinks is that anytime i add something to whiskey it makes whiskey worse so I don't understand the fucking point of a whiskey mixed drink in a sense because they'll

give me this and they're like oh we've added bitters to this in a sugar cube and I'm like okay but it tastes less good now because of that so I at one point they were ordering the stuff and I asked them to and the waiter asked me you know which what you know what cocktail would you like and I said I'd like this one it was like number 69 on the cocktail list or something. It's a whiskey one. I said, but I'd like you to hold everything except the whiskey. And we're in Wisconsin. This is where my wife's family at.

And they brought it back, and he did that. I was getting like half pints of whiskey instead of a cocktail for the rest of the evening, which was phenomenal. I loved it. I'm like, oh, this is great service. This is what I was expecting. But no one else in that family is who I needed. That was the problem.

It's because the rest of the family is not big drinkers. If I'd been at home with my family, like a family gathering, everyone would have had that, right? So everyone would have been wasted, and you could have said fucking anything you wanted, and at the end of it, you'd be fine. But this was my wife's family, so they're all like, two of them are drinking whatever it happens to be that teller's drinking over here a little bit of champagne slowly not

like you know nursing it and i'm like yeah i'll have a fourth you know like that's how like like my my dad's side of the family is catholic and so every big event over there they're like hey you know saturday the fifth it's like what's that it doesn't matter we're get drinking you know like they catholic people are probably the most fun group to hang out with on religious holidays because there's never even aside from like maybe a couple of actual like catholic relatives most of them it's like if you even ask them like hey you believe in god they're like oh like oh come on let's not get into that. You're going full Hillary on this. Didn't she rock Catholics recently? Like, ah, Catholics, they're fucking

drunks, don't believe in God. I love them. Catholics are fun. They know how to have fun on Christmas. They don't get caught up like Baptists and those people who are like, no dancing, no salted meats, no snacks, like, especially no boots. footloose was yeah yeah

get wild what backgrounds are you guys coming from so i don't care about the religious element i'm caring about the alcohol like backgrounds in your families like different so my uh both my grandfathers um died of alcohol related illnesses at early ages I laugh because of how inappropriate it is that you're doing a drinking podcast about it but that's the case but anyways so both of my grandfathers they died

from alcohol it killed them so yeah both of them died my dad drinks I wouldn't say regularly but I wouldn't say occasionally either It killed him! So yeah, both of them died. My dad drinks. I wouldn't say regularly, but I wouldn't say occasionally either. Somewhere in between. He usually keeps beer in his fridge over at his shop.

And in the afternoon he may have three or he may have eight if it's been a hard day. But he's a big guy, so he doesn't get sloppy by any means. He just gets friendly. And that's about it. My mom...

Like some strong beer like Filthy has or just a nice Miller Lite or whatever the hell it is? It's Miller Lite. He's just drinking beer. Yeah. There was one time... Miller Lite's 4.4%, I think? It's 5 now. I don't know.

It's fine. 4.4. I think I looked this up recently because I was having a conversation about this. I like Miller Lite. But I've bought kegs of beer to shoot before, and I would have one left over. They would have a whole keg. My father's father was a bad alcoholic.

He ran away when my dad was 10, I think. And he used to beat his wife and maybe my dad or his sister or something like that. He was a bad guy. And because of that, my father had strong opinions on alcohol. My mother doesn't drink much. She'll have a glass at Easter and maybe New Year's or something like that. I think in another universe where she married some other guy, maybe she'd drink a little more but not a lot. Maybe have three glasses on an

occasion like that but your dad doesn't drink whatsoever at all no not only does he not drink whatsoever at all like i we were children and uh we reported my mother to this school as someone who had a drinking problem you know because she drinks wine too often i forget the phrasing but it was like yeah she has a wine and you know like it's not right and uh they looked into it and they kind of laughed at us when we thought you know like two glasses a year was a lot but that was my father's influence like we thought that any drink was a crazy drink and uh and yeah we reported it's so funny so i did a similar thing with that what do you like we we had some like health presentation i don't remember what grade this is middle school

sometime and they came in they're talking about you know they might be a drunk at this that or the other and like and i like after class like asked one of them i'm like you know i think my dad drinks this much per night type deal and they're just just like okay like they know fucking like you're like they looked into it for you for me they're just like yeah okay kid go away you know forget if it was my brother if it was it might have been my brother who reported my mother for excessive drinking and the school system called her and asked her about it and she smoothed it over but we thought that yeah that her level of drinking was literally just a few drinks a year was excessive because my father is just i've never seen him have a drink of anything in my whole life uh he told me that he drank once when he was a kid and didn't know it, that he was having – what is vodka and orange juice called?

A screwdriver? Screwdriver. Yeah, he was having screwdrivers and he didn't realize it was alcoholic. The most is champagne. I know. I have champagne on the brain. Anyway, I think I'm dragging out the story. So yeah, my drinking background is hardly any drinking at all.

My father would be ashamed if he saw that I had drinking Kyle's best. He would not be for that. Despicable! Despicable. Classless. I hate this champagne. This is dry, and it is horrible. I'm going to go downstairs and look for a drink hold on what year is that champagne because this Chandon it brute classic from California

it is a if they don't put the year I assume this is like yes August I don't know like I think with champagne is you don't want an old champagne like that's not what you're going for uh oh you don't want like an old carbonated beverage i wouldn't think right yeah i think it i don't think it has necessarily to do with the carbonation so um i have no idea i was talking to a friend recently like one of my wife's sister's husbands and they were talking about uh miller light with their beer that doesn't meet spec, doesn't meet Miller Lite spec, which God alone is with that.

You know, that's a pretty low bar, right? That is apparently another brand of beer that we are buying now. Does that seem reasonable to you? That feels like an urban legend to me in a sense. But I am kind of curious if this is the case. Wait, what do you mean? I'm misunderstanding.

Okay, so when you brew a beer, there's things that can go wrong with that. It can be you can get the color off from various reasons. You can get the taste off slightly. You can have like a skunked beer when you brew a beer. That's just like the batch is no good,

this style thing, right? And my understanding is that the Miller Lite level of brewing, that's what needs to happen. Like the spec for the color, the taste, the flavor, who the fuck knows what else, right? You know, that when that is not met, that is still bottled and sold,

but it's sold as a different brand of beer. You guys haven't heard this at all? So like take the old Miller Lite, or like the bad Bud Light, sell it as natural light? Yeah, yeah, exactly. McNatty Lite is like something like that, I believe. Now I don't fucking know this.

And that could just be like, it sounds urban legend-y in a sense, because it sounds like bullshit. But I'm kind of curious. Do you guys know either way? I don't know, but that's interesting. But I like Natty Light. It reminds me of college. That's what I get kegs of to shoot.

Natty Light is the cheapest keg to buy. It's fun. It's just like keg to buy. It's fun. It's just like the taste of it. It's not good. It's not flavorful. It tastes like slightly beer-y water. That's it. It's basically water.

You're hydrating at the same time. But that's what we drank in college because it was like, hey, do you want to get a 30? Or do you want to buy this, that, and the other? Or do you want to get a 30-pack you want to buy this that and the other or do you want to get a 30 pack of natty light at this walmart for nine dollars it's like well let's get six of those and then i don't know like some tic tacs with the money left like that's about it like that's all you ever need that's like if you showed up with a 30 rack of natty light a natty pack everybody loved you i like that well not as much as they'd love you if you brought a bag of wine but i've spent a lot of time going over the value intrinsic in a bag of wine around college-age girls yes yeah they all love that because it's basically like you know girls on college campuses

get drinks for free no matter what is the point to get drunk or to get laid both neither is the point to get drunk or to get laid behind Both. Neither. Is the point to get drunk or to get laid behind this alcohol? Because I feel like the wine – Tonight for us? No, for the beer that Taylor's buying. No, I'm talking – this is like if you're going to a party. So, like, if you go – if I went to a big party – I'm on board.

Then I would show up with a 30-pack of natty if it was just a bunch of, like, dudes hanging out partying for the most part and then some girls trickling in but if it's a bunch of girls going you bring a big bag of wine because they're so used to like hey do you want another natty do you want another you know pull of this nasty ass mccormick's vodka that everybody's pulling out of in this nasty hallway with a half sunken floor because there's so much spilled shit in it and there's like raccoons running around the ceiling but if you had a bag of wine like anywhere else in the world you hold a nice bag of wine up for a woman and she'll go no thank you but that's like an upper echelon that's like oh look at this oh that's that's not even

carbonated mainly that's that's wine through a nozzle have you ever had wine through a nozzle samantha i have not go this guy aerates it yeah and then you go slap the bag and then they go what and you go come on just give it a slap slap that bag and then you get people into it and they slap the bag and they turn the nozzle and they drink it and everybody's having a good time that's i remember in high school there was a guy i went to high school with charles something really good looking guy right so that helped him with the girls out of the gate that he was super good looking and uh he had a van today they call it a rape van because it was all beat up and it was white and had no windows and he pulls up to us and there's four girls in the back he's got four girls there's no chairs or anything in this van it's like a workman's van and they're just

like moving around bumping into the sides and he's like yeah gotman's van. And they're just like moving around, bumping into the sides. And he's like, yeah, got the fucking party van, boys. We're like, go, Charles. Woo-hoo. And he's like, this is great. I throw a fucking six-pack of beer back there. All four of them get drunk. He does it. He slides a six-pack to him.

The four girls start drinking in the back, and then he drives off. One would assume he had a five wear or something. That guy's going for short term skeevy gain of getting a couple girls drunk and trying to take advantage of them. What you want to do is be the guy who comes in consistently and doesn't just bring booze, brings a

fun time. So when you walk in they're like, that guy is a fucking blast. Give him half an hour and he'll be doing something bananas. And like, that's the person they want to be around you know because the girls can walk over to any guy and be like hey can i have a pull of your jack daniels and they'll go oh yeah and then they go all right see you later and like that's they can do that wherever they want so you don't want to just be trying to get people drunk in a shady shitty trumpian kind of way. You know? You need to do it and you gotta win the person.

Anyway. Trumpian. Is that coined? Is this new? Because I think that we should definitely... This is like... What am I looking at?

It's the birth of a new meme. If it's not yet on the internet, then I take full credit. If not, then... I think what you're describing is a hot Cosby. Santorum. That's what I'm thinking of. This is the equivalent coining centaurum right there yeah centaur i felt bad for him

because he was very not he was very not likable and an asshole but at the same time it's like his kids are named centaurum too dick like come on his wife. Don't be mean. I don't know. That's the first thing I thought of when that attack happened. It's like, poor little Lisa Santorum. Or whoever his kids are. For people that don't know, Dan Savage is a podcaster who gives, like, sex advice and love advice and relationship advice. And he's very much into, like, he's pro-sex, I think they say. He's pro-sex, right? So, you know, he would not ever call someone a slut or something like that.

And he's gay. And Santorum, of course, is the opposite. He would describe him as anti-sex, only in the context of marriage, maybe just for procreation. Bottom line, Santorum has become the official word for cum, like post-ejaculate that dribbles back out of a guy's ass. That is now called Santorum. That's coined from his podcast, which is fucking phenomenal.

Yeah, and now it's like a thing. Like people know what Santorum is. I know what Santorum is. It's the cum that drips back out after anal sex it's santorum that's what it's called and uh um he the santorum is the last name of a presidential candidate and senator from pennsylvania one of the like no chance candidates though like the second debate guy b team uh i want to say like you know how in the republican party for whatever reason it seems like almost all of them take a turn being in first place like a huge peak and then

a giant valley yeah so he was in first place he was the presumptive presidential candidate for a week uh he was a ben carson of his day can i can i read the official definition of his day four years ago yeah go ahead okay it's as uh defined as the frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex that's what the new definition of santorum is and it's just taken some asshole's last name and made it that way that's that is in some degree that's hilarious like it's kind of like a power that i don't know that i'd want to see abused regularly, but fuck, that is hilarious and like a one-off for that. It is, yeah. You can't do it too regularly.

Trumpian, I like it. That's good. I like it. Yeah, so if you have something bigly you want to show a woman and you get her nice and drunk and then you grab her pussy, that's a Trumpian thing to do. She wants it anyway. She does. I mean, only if you're a star you host the apprentice like you know like i saw an snl bit where donald trump said

i am the highest paid actor on network tv right now which obviously means i am the best actor on network tv right now it turns out he lying. He made a million bucks a season. It turns out. Of course he was. When has he? Like, when did he do it? Dude, he said he was, he told the world he was getting paid 30 million a season, right? It turns out he valued 29 million of that in promotional value for his brand.

And I guess you can kind of sort of defend it. Like, Trump was getting famous and known but his like actual business that that does make sense that like if you're like if you see a hotel and you're on a face no no i'm not saying that's stretching i'm saying though that he can claim some sort of brand benefit when like you know donald stevens if he had a line of luxury hotels nobody would pull up and be like, oh, the Stevens Hotel, my god, let's go stay. But Trump had that little bit

of name recognition, that lot bit of name recognition. I guess there's some value to it, but I think it's funny that he valued 29-third-iest of his compensation. Yes, very. A huge overblowing of that value. When it's like, this isn't like 100 billion people you're

reaching like just like you can't aggregate every like it's like saying that pka has reached a billion people if you add up all the views and everything yeah yeah it's like you're hitting the same people over and over you're hitting those same nbc audiences all the time donald like so even then with your perceived value you're not making that much regardless kyle um you are proven right yet again blues are playing the minnesota wild right now tied 1-1 and ryan suiter just scored a goal a defenseman which is rare his first game of the season and that's who you messaged me yesterday saying i'm going to take ryan suiter as defense because it looks like he's going to have a good season.

And I even told Kyle. I even told him. I was like, I don't know if that's a great pick, honestly. Minnesota's on the downswing. They're not going to be that great. They'll be solid, but they're in the Central Division, so they're not going to perform well because they have to play against St. Louis, Chicago, Nashville, Dallas. St. Louis is not a hard game

anymore. I don't know. We beat Chicago 5-2 last night. You traded away all your best players and you're getting older. No, that's not true. The players that were on the team last year are a year older than they were previously. Oh, that's a true stat. Sorry, Kyle. What were you saying?

I think the Blackfeet are going to win that conference this year. I don't think it's going to go very well for your team, unfortunately. But that's based on about three days. Yeah, exactly. The Blues. The Conductors. But that's based on like three days of internet research. I think we should do our draft and get everything cemented in.

Because I think I have good ideas and some good picks i didn't just i did eight hours worth of research or something like that it's not like i know what i'm talking about but in the life of kyle now you know yeah yeah there's some fantasy hockey research yeah there was one day when i was like all right make sure we beat everyone let's win um or at least not fail i don't want to fail miserably like as long as i can stay in the middle despite my you had reasonably good strategies you messaged me being like so i'm thinking about getting joe thornton and joe pavelski since one is an assist machine and one is a goal scoring machine and maybe that would be well on a first line and i hadn't even considered picking two people from the same team for that reason because it seems like you synergize better

if you do something. Yeah, that totally makes sense because then any time one of them gets a point and your stat, two of them do. My team was stronger than anyone you guys picked. It was all Hall of Famers, actually. All Hall of Famers from the 70s. He got Gretzky before any of us could. Yeah, I was like, I'll pick the good players.

You know, Lindros, Gretzky, Lemieux. One of them was still playing, Jagger. He almost got cut from the team. Yeah, Bobby was like, I'll pick the good players. You know, Lindros, Gretzky, Lemieux. One of them was still playing, Jagger. He almost got cut from the team. Yeah, Bobby Orr. Brett Hull would be legit. Brett Hull. You need to start picking people from, like, the 19-teens. Like, I don't know, like, Luke, quick skates, McGillicuddy, or whatever.

Like, you know, a coal miner in his spare time, as his real job, often came out to play for the montreal canadians doing his best to bring that same excitement he brings to the coal mine do the ice like that kind of shit where like athletes had to do other jobs that's fucking hilarious to me to look back and like look at highlights from any sport from like i don't know i guess highlights don't go back like super super far because cause you need video. But even like the earliest highlights of any sport you can find like the best goals, the best passes.

It's like, good God, that guy wouldn't make Alabama the college team today on a bet. And he's like the best quarterback in the seventies or the sixties rather. Cause I guess the seventies had a number of good hockey. It's the speed, man. Just go watch them go from blue line to blue line,

it seems like they're twice as fast now. They're so quick. They break out so fast. I'm like, is there something wrong with the video? Like, was it recorded in 30 frames per second, and they're playing it back at 24, making everything, I guess, slower? Yeah, that's what it would do. Yeah, it's incredibly fast.

Like last year at the skills competition, because they do that every year where they have the all-star game where they do everything, and they'll have hardest slap shot, do all this. Dylan Larkin, a last-year rookie for the Detroit Red Wings, they have, like, an around-the-ice speed race to see how fast you can start on one side, skate all the way around as fast as you can. It's not like – it's harder than speed skating

because speed skates are meant for the, not harder, in a different way. Speed skates are meant for long strides to get you high speed. Hockey skates are meant for agility. So to get to a really high speed, you have to have very strong quads, calves, your legs. And this guy, just an 18-year-old at the time,

beat the world record of how fast someone can skate around at a like bullshit, you you know 8 p.m whoo skills competition up next the slap shot like just blew past a world record 18 years old and it's like what the fuck like it has to be because there's no way this 18 year old is like a physically fit like literally superior specimen than the best 18 year old in 1968 but i feel like they've just turned definitely This is definitely a better person, a better specimen. No, I'm saying just an 18-year-old, no drugs, no pills, no augmenting. Oh, I see.

The best 18-year-old specimen before they hit the big leagues. I think what makes it is they've basically turned sports into a science in a lot of ways now, like the way goaltending is in hockey. If you watch goaltending highlights from the 70s, that's just a bunch of guys out there flailing around hoping for the best. Now, like, they have to every year make new rules of like, all right, the pads got to get smaller,

and we got to make it way harder for these fucking goalies to stop the puck because people aren't scoring enough, man. Like, that's a serious problem the NHL has, is that goalies are too good because they don't do the flailing and the nonsense. They stay square to the puck, and sometimes it looks is that goalies are too good because they don't do the flailing and the nonsense. They stay square to the puck, and sometimes it looks boring, but they're doing exactly what they have to do because they have it down to a geometric science.

If that guy's standing there, I know I need to be right here to cover the maximum amount of net. If he passes it over there, I know exactly the angle I put my foot to slide my left pad over and be ready for that one-timer. Like, that's what it is. It's just more science and analytics that is making all of our athletes better. Can I ask an alcohol question? Sure.

Choose. I think they're wines for me. You don't know the category? No, I don't know the category. Here, I'll read to you what I do know. Inspired by the alchemist's flower, a bursting, swirling, billowy bloom of a rose This blended rash is plush and juicy And sweet flavors of a candy-coated fruit

Its smooth berry taste and rich body Is amazing on its own Or paired with a decadent dark chocolate That's one choice Not for me The other choice Take a leap into the great unknown with Passarola Named for Portugal's finest balloon ship.

It tells me nothing. I'm having a hard time reading it. For Portugal's finest balloon ship. The Passarola is a symbol of whimsy adventure, and the spirit is embodied here. With notes of white peach, grapefruit, and lemon, you're embarking in your very own journey. Let me just

be safe i will as the guests since i do not have the sponsors that you have i will take the first crack at these ones because i just have to say we could do a whole segment for the next fucking half hour of you just reading those labels if you had like 10 more downstairs that would be beautiful because like are you kidding me with those descriptions what person actually like drinks a liquid based on what you just described? A balloon ship. Well, I do like balloons. I think the paramotorist in me wants to have the balloon ship one.

Let's crack this bitch open. Yep. I think this is how it's normally done, right? Do you want me to read the definition of my champagne? Snap your blade. Do you not have the corkscrew part on your... I'm going to read the definition of my champagne. Snap your blade. Why have you... Do you not have the corkscrew part on your... We don't have alcohol accessories in my house.

Did you have a little pocket, like, mini tool thingy? Does it not have a corkscrew? It doesn't. It just has... We need to start to... Well, we should do an ad. It just has this. Throw an ad out.

You know what you can do? If you can't get it out that way, you can push the cork into the bottle and drink it the classy way. Is it an actual cork cork or is it one of the plastic ones? It is a cork cork. So don't fragment it as you're doing it and you'll be fine. And you have to drink the whole thing tonight if you're going to do that.

Yeah, you have to drink the whole thing because you just're going to do that. Yeah, you have to drink the whole thing because you just fucked up the cork. We just want everyone to know that this episode is being brought to you by Pankler. This episode of Pankler already is being brought to you by Squarespace. Your sites will look professionally designed regardless of your skill level

and there's no coding required when you use Squarespace. They have intuitive and easy to use tools. Squarespace has state ofof-the-art technology powering your site to ensure security and stability. They're trusted by millions of people and some of the most respected brands in the world. You can start your free trial today with no credit card

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slash PKA. How much coding is required to do it, Kyle? Like none. No coding. No coding. You explicitly said it. Not a single bit of code. Not one code you'll have to do. Check it out. Squarespace.com. you'll be a fool if you don't invest how's that all right how's that uh vino you got over there it seems like when i tip it it reseals so i put it sideways i don't know if you can see the cork no that's good yeah you can is that a white wine you could if you

wished i don't know uh would, pour that into a glass. This is a spectrum that I don't want anything on. The dry to sweet spectrum. I'd prefer bitter, honestly. I'd prefer a bitter IPA beer to any really sweet thing, or especially anything dry, where you just drink it and you go like... Holy fuck. When I met you guys in person i really wish you had expressed to me that you had no beer experience and i would have done my best to have done just a little bit to knock that away if i

could have like okay like with beer knowledge but i feel like you would blow me like i don't i don't have a lot of beer knowledge i just would like to show you beers that are worth drinking because like the things you're saying makes me so sad for your alcohol experience makes me feel bad of micro breweries we have a fuck ton of micro brews here because i guess after anaheiser bush got bought out a bunch of people the the douchebag like not billy bush i wanted to say that was the guy from the trump tape but whatever the the son of the bushes who owns and Anheuser-Busch started his own brewery here to be like a St. Louis one to replace Anheuser-Busch. And he called it Kraftig with the umlaut above the I. Where it's like, wait, you wanted to make this?

And your tagline's like, the beer for St. Louis. You named it something wildly German that doesn't sound American. That's ludicrous. Why would would you do that i don't know but uh what do you got a sweat towel and he switched his shirt again you guys don't know uh i think you missed it in the the unfortunately lost second episode that woody has changed shirts now twice. He switched from the first shirt to his athletic wear, preparing for the sweat. I'm as dry as I could be right now. Am I alone in this?

I'm just completely dry. Okay. This is a shirt that I had this Alabama shirt. We covered this in the other part. And someone got really mad at me for wearing an Alabama shirt. They're like, fuck you. Fucking Woody. I know you don't know shit about sports and you don't know what you just did, which is true.

And you're like, how dare you wear this thing? How could you say Roll Tide? I don't know. I got a free T-shirt. So now I got a T-shirt. It says Go Bucks and it's like Nike dry fit and shit. So Go Bucks. And if you don't like it, suck a dick.

I did wear an athletic shirt today. I went biking, had an athletic shirt on. But now that we're drinking, we're back to t-shirts. Because athletic shirts and drinking doesn't really make that much sense to me. Oh, you don't drink at the level I do. That's true. You can't drink like this in cotton. Are you a sports guy at all i mean am i i am a fair weather patriots fan and other than that which is always so a very ardent patriot

my my brother is the huge patriots fan in my family and uh i like how i like the evil genius balanchek but that that to me is something that is something i'd like to watch because we're talking about like sports as a science i like the idea of sports as a metagame too like the evil genius Balanchek. That to me is something I'd like to watch. Because we're talking about sports as a science. I like the idea of sports as a metagame too. The fact that he metagames the shit out of that is really, really interesting to me. What do you mean by that? In what way does he metagame it? Because he's not just playing the positions on the field and the players on the field. He's also playing the teams, the managers, the coaches.

He's playing things like if we buy any of this, whatever it was, the fucking ball inflation shit, then if he really did, if that was actually intentional, I like that. Not necessarily the cheating element, but I like the fact that he thought at some level, he's like, you know, I could fuck with him on this level, and then tries that. I mean, this is so outside, like, what you consider the normal, like, scope of the game, that someone seeing that broad a picture is just really like i'm impressed by that he's a he's a tactician yeah he knows exactly what he wants to do against every team and so as much as you hate the guy like for cheating or whatever you want to say i don't know the actual truth of that about deflate gate and everything but at the very least he's kept this team fucking competitive for a long time did they also like secretly record rival teams' practices or was that someone else? And also, wasn't the shit with recording the...

They were getting someone to read the face, read the mouth movements of the guy. This type of shit, that kind of shit is so fucking cool. Probably not good for the sport as a whole, but I really like it. He's like Seinfeld. He's got a fucking lip reader in there. I think that's actually cheating, but... Yeah, but yeah i bet you that's

no no no no the the recording of the practices and like trying to like pilfer playbooks or whatever the fuck they were doing but regardless even if they're like if they're doing that every year then other teams need to start doing it because they're winning all the goddamn time. Are you a Bruins fan at all? I'm not a hockey fan in general. But I did grow up in the Northeast, so I heard more about the Bruins than I might like. So you never gave it...

Did you play sports growing up? I did play some sports growing up. I did watch college... I'd go to college hockey games for a while. I can't remember what year... how old I was. My dad would bring me to college hockey hockey games we'd go live and watch that at like university of maine stuff not much fighting in college no i don't know if you fight in a college like ncaa hockey game they act like you like brought a baby out there and slaughtered it in front of everyone like they have such a hard no fighting rule in college hockey that it makes no sense because just like two guys

every year get drafted straight from the ncaa program to the nhl and you take someone who's not that muscular doesn't know how to fight and then you put them in a league with a bunch of guys who are very muscular and do know how to fight is that how you described ncaa hockey like that mostly like 1980s olympic players, skinny little non-fighter guys? They're non-fighters. Some of them are very, very good hockey players. It's just a matter of, like, they're not even in, like, the OHL, which is, like, the Ontario Hockey League, which is, like, a big minor league in Canada.

It's just NCAA. So they don't have enough time like all those other semi pros to be working out and getting strong all the time which is why players that come from the ncaa straight to the nhl usually don't have an excellent rookie season because they take one brutal hit and then the rest of the time they're out there they're like jesus christ can the off season please come so i can work out because i'm getting the shit out of me every single night like and that's how it usually goes where if it's become from like a league in Switzerland, a professional league. There's hitting and fighting enough that you'll know how to handle yourself.

But, oh, I'm just so happy that hockey is back. My interest in politics is already careening, careening downward in comparison. You just needed a sport to follow over the summer and it was trump and hillary i just needed to anesthetize me like i needed to watch some kind of competition and as with any competition i get into hillary and trump and i'm like all right trump he's my team and then you treat it like a sport where it's like it doesn't matter they can say whatever they want about the trumpkins they're my my team. They deserve this championship. But now that real sports has started, oh man, I'm so

happy to have hockey back. I am excited. In my opinion, I think it's UFC 194. The one that Kyle and I saw at the theater, I think it was 194, is the best UFC card to have ever existed. There's one coming

up shortly after the election, like November 10th maybe, something like that, 12th. It's in Madison Square Garden. Hillary versus Trump? It's a UFC card. It is the best card ever put together. We don't know if it will be the best event because we haven't seen the fights yet. But, oh, my God.

Like, I am so jazzed for this. There's this concept of, I think I've talked about this before, of sacrificing to the MMA gods so that the event actually happens. BJ Penn dropped out. His whole card was, we've made our sacrifice. Right? Now we just need Conor to make weight without slipping in a bathtub and cracking his head open or whatever the fuck would ruin this. And the event coming up in new york i'm going to pay for it with real money and watch it non-fired it because i wanted

an hd because it's worth it it is fucking everything you want in an in a ufc card fucking wonder boy versus woodley is i can't wait for that to happen and it's not even the main event because conor mcgregor is fighting Alvarez. Fucking Tim Kennedy is getting his rematch against Yolva Romero, and it's in the fucking prelims. This could headline a card. The prelims in this card are incredible. Everything about this fucking UFC 205 is the thing.

People are getting tickets in the mail. They're fucking, like, holograms or something. Like, it's never been done before. This event, like, oh, my God, I hope it really happens in real life. That's it. Oh, you guys have heard it from me before. But, like, in the UFC, the Super Bowl might not happen this year. Happens all the time.

This was the balloon wine? Yes. Yeah, it was. I just really want to be clear. A tip for you, Woody. Pour it into a glass because if you drink it straight out of the bottle, only a little bit of liquid's getting out, and you still get all of the bad flavor. You pour

it in a glass, and you can get quite a bit more down before the flavor turns you down. This is honestly one of... This is honestly one of the worst alcoholic beverages I've ever had. I hate this. This is horrible. My mouth is so dry and tart. I don it's it's pretty sour

that's like i love spicy stuff i love salty stuff sour stuff if anything like sour patch kids are enough to to ruin the next like half hour for me because they make my teeth hurt i fucking hate sour stuff and this is just enough of a sour to be spiteful like you have to drink me you know you have to drink me and and so you hate it i put it in a g fuel glass i just happen to have it around by the way g fuel coupon code woody 40 off this weekend 40 40 that doesn't happen very often maybe once or twice a year probably twice maybe twice a year yeah bi-annually if you ever wanted to see what g fuel was all about i really did take it before the show so so I'd wake the fuck up.

I was going to say you could pour the G Fuel into that white wine. I don't think you're a true friend. That is disgusting. It will have super caffeinate that alcohol. But seriously, G Fuel, it wakes you the fuck up, makes you pay attention. I take it before the show as a performance enhancing drug. 40% off. Coupon code WOODIE.

I was just fucking with this cap that comes on the top of the cork, and I, goddammit, I just cut myself fucking deep. Joey! I want to see blood. How bad is that? Nice! If you, like, fail at opening the fucker and cut yourself, like, oh my god. No, no, no. I wasn't see blood. How bad is that? If you fail at opening the fucker and cut yourself.

No, no, no. I wasn't opening it. You either have to talk to Chiz about rebranding this as maybe not a drinking episode, or prepare for drinking. It's got to be one or the other, right? Yeah. Kyle, I think you're due for another shot, my friend. I do. I lied. There's more alcohol than this. I have a half bottle of white wine in

the fridge that's been there for two months that both myself and melissa really don't care for and so it's now just something of that'll sit there until we need room in the fridge and so i guess i can grab that after this but I'd rather not let's see where you're at god damn it you took a shot so I guess Woody and I can blow right now maybe you can't either I just drank like a second ago Kyle can you do an ad read

I'm not sure I know we've got a lot of ads this week I don't know where we are Kyle feel free to speak any moment. I'm blowing too. So somebody's gotta fucking talk. Tired of eating the same bland food while trying to stay healthy? Well NatureBox has the solution to your problem. Making smarter choices doesn't mean you have to eat

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I would pay $25 for peanut butter nom noms right now. You know what? We all wish we had a nature box next to us right now. I swear, I wish I did. I wish I did. We are in a snack food rut in my house and nature box peanut butter nom noms would just be

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Naturebox.com slash pka. Two bags of snacks for free. Snack healthy. Snack easy. Alright right are you done now that one yes yeah right how many ads have we read one or two or one so three more to go well we'll talk about uber tracker and so on later ubers I must ask so the next time you do one of these drug streams actually I would love to volunteer for the next one I don't know if that's possible or not, but just give me

a couple of days heads up so I can get a breathalyzer too, and we can do this properly. We can prepare for it. We can make it happen. We can do a little bit more regimented. You know what? Maybe we do it again next week and we do it right. I think that Woody would love it. Kyle,

just looking at Kyle's face right now, I see he loves that idea. Are you suggesting we record the whole time? I'll take it. Hold on. Let's not go crazy. I mean, Woody was just thinking, I mean, we have our traditional 90-minute convo prior to the show. And then we begin.

I'm so mad. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it. I'm so mad. It didn't mean it. I didn't know. I'm so mad. It was the first 90 minutes was fun too. We had a couple revelations. Woody told us about his teacher who thought he was

retarded. Taylor told some fun stories. It was a good time. It was a good time. We talked about Chiz. Fuck you, Miss Fields. I'm not retarded. Shout out to Miss Fields. I'm not retarded. Shout out to Miss Fields. I bet you're dead by now.

There was some redemption in eighth grade when they decided to put Woody on the other side of the spectrum. The advanced placement English class. Good special. Yeah, that's what they called it. Um, and, uh... But yeah, we missed out on some stuff. So we gotta endeavor

to persevere. Have no fear, I will retell stories. Don't worry, you will hear that again. Not once, not twice, probably thrice at the minimum. Cheers. Cheers, there you go. How is that wine that you're drinking warm? It reminds me of a balloon ship.

Do you feel like you're in a balloon ship and you're looking down and going, there's the Alps, honey. Aren't you so happy we're here? It transposes you. But on a day that's so hot, your face kind of sweats. Yes, that's what it feels like.

See, when I'm having Shandon, the only thought I'm. See, when I'm having Shandon, the only thought I'm thinking is, when is it over? And the answer is, not soon enough. It's over in half a bottle. Half a bottle. All right.

Hey, we have this thing, patreon.com slash pka. There's different levels. You can buy early access to the shows catch it on like thursday or friday when everyone else is waiting till saturday uh early audio only lots of cool shit anyway well at the ten dollar level you can ask us questions influence the show so for i guess i'll start with taylor i don't i don't know let's throw it out there. We'll all answer as Guys, I'm 22. What do you say if a girl you have

friends with benefits with is pregnant? Oh. Ho ho. How old is he? I am happy that I have no experience with this because that sounds stressful as fuck. Best of luck, buddy. What you need to be doing is first, when she

brings it up to you, ask. I go first. Okay, okay. Go ahead. Yeah, you're going to want to offer to pay for that abortion. It's $400 to $600. You can go with her or not. It really depends on if you're feeling up to it. You're going to want to immediately offer to pay.

But in the end, it is her choice so she uh you you're not going to want to be forceful about this like you're just going to want to put it out there that hey regardless of what you decide i support it and i'll fund it 100 now to some regard that means that you'll support the child for, which you're going to have to do anyway. Yeah, so you shouldn't say that. Yeah, well, I mean, a judge is going to say it if you don't. So go ahead and get that out there. But hopefully she's willing to get an abortion since you're very, very young and presumably –

because you came to us with this question. You didn't say, hey, I'm trying to form my life now. I'm about to have a child. I'm 24 years old. I need to get this about to have a child. I'm 24 years old. I need to get this, this, and that. 22. Yeah, 22. You said, I'm 22, and she just told me she's pregnant.

What do I do? So clearly you're terrified, and you want to have an abortion, and you should just offer to pay for it and be really, really supportive, and you can't push her. You've just got to be there for her because of you know the society we live in and morality and such you know no stare i am pro-choice but i think like a lot of people that are pro-choice not enthusiastically pro-choice dude it's a way more gray area issue than people like to talk about but yeah i know exactly what you mean the one thing i'd throw

out there is i feel like you're more morally in the clear the faster you get it done right get that thing out of her don't hang out and wait and like like i feel like you know if you're going to be pro if you're going to have an abortion earlier is better don't just hang out and like deny it or whatever not only is the surgery less invasive and destructive and such but also the baby is less of a baby uh the earlier you go so uh yeah uh don't don't dilly dally on this call if you were a patreon you'd get this information several days earlier just saying if you're 500 i will perform your abortion exactly you just text them back or something like you know the email now be like we'll give you this one for free you know we made the question we don't have that info yeah right 500 patreons i will perform

the abortion for you oh god using so think of that as like a safety net that you're paying for every month. That, hey, one less thing to worry about. Kyle's there. Don't need an abortion doc. He can handle this. Yeah, the problem is it would be an overdose of Kyle's fucking, what is it, apple-flavored, you know, Everclear distillery.

That would be the abortion. Just this. Let me get the shot back. Oh, God. That's terrible. You said there were three cinnamon sticks. Right. Four days later, she finds a cinnamon stick

in her vagina. That's how you know it took. That's how you know it took. You find the cinnamon stick and you're all in the clear. You basically just leave Easter eggs in women's vaginas for them to find later. Well, I hope this took.

Oh, thank God. The cinnamon stick's poking out. That's Kyle, the cinnamon man of Christian Clinic's calling card. I won. I got the big one. I would say for that guy, 22 years old rather, his friends with benefits is pregnant.

First, you want to ask uh who else have you told because not like you're gonna fucking murder her or something just because you want to see if maybe you're not the only guy mind-blowing brace for this mr mr question asker you're probably not the only guy that she's fucking right now very rarely is there an exclusive friends with benefits situation because you're not a relationship you're just friends with benefits and so you want to start off by asking a question that won't implicate you in it you want to have her say this is your baby and then you will know that it's your baby or you can have a paternity test taken uh actually no the child has to be born for that so you you want to avoid that if possible. Woody, you're raising your hand.

I'm going to... Matt. Thank you. Now, friends with benefits situations, crazy... Kyle, these things have no accuracy whatsoever. What the fuck is that number? .035? So you're half of legal limit for driving?

That can't be true. Kyle, you're right. What the fuck is that? He's drank a whole one of these things and some Captain Morgan and these things mean nothing. But, um, uh, oh, oh, my interpretation of a

friends with benefits situation was that typically one of them wants to be a boyfriend or a girlfriend and is settling. I think it's generational. You think this is generational, Gap? I do, is settling. I think it's generational. You think this is a generational gap? I do, I do. I think friends with benefits are a much more commonly

and much more reasonable arrangement with terms of people who just want to fuck, which is totally reasonable. This was a term that existed when I was in college, but none of my friends had friends with benefits or anything. I didn't know anyone who scored such an arrangement. It was like something you'd see in a movie. Holy Grail.

Yeah, Holy Grail. Perfect. That's what I'm looking for. Yeah, what you're saying is true. I think it's somewhat generational, but it's also, like, I think it's understood societally and evolutionarily that men want sex that's our modus operandi men want sex because that's how you reproduce women want commitment because women can get sex whenever they want and so they don't have they commitment is women's sex you have to work to get it and i think that if you're in a friendship benefits at least one person either the guy or the gal in that situation

would like for it to become something larger i can't agree with that i think that there's a possibility i think there are lots of scenarios where that occurs and i don't want to like rule it out i don't disagree there are scenarios where that occurs but i think you can find scenarios where that occurs and it's mutual that is the point of that that the goal is actually for friends with bencheship you don't want this like weird, like kind of emotional commitment from one person and not from another. You just want the fucking sex. So I've done the FWB thing quite a bit before.

And it's always that usually the girl wants a relationship out of it because that's their end game more than the man's end game. Because if a guy can get the you know milk for free without buying the cow to use a very old term then he's going to do that a lot of the time you know i'm glad you brought it up because i wasn't going to but i i knew that you had fwb experience trailer you achieved the holy grail in a way that i never did um would you describe yourself as out of that girl's league? I don't have a better phrasing, but like, you know, were you a reach goal for her, a stretch goal?

No. And that's why she was desperately hoping that she could land you by giving you all this sex? No, if anything, I think that girls... Jesus, let's... Let's give some fucking autonomy to women too. Women like sex. I was about to do that. There are girls who like sex. I was right about to say that. I was about to say that.

She's like, what did she think she was getting in return for all of this sex? I mean, it must have felt terrible for her. I didn't mean that. But I do think that, you know, if she wanted the relationship and Taylor didn't, I wondered if there was a power imbalance. It is a little... No, I wouldn't even say it is a power imbalance. I would say that at least once it's happened where a relationship was wanted and it wasn't achieved because I wasn't interested. But most of the time, it's like you're both having sex for fun because you're enjoying it. But at the end of the day, if the opportunity were presented to the girl in that scenario that, hey, do you want to become exclusive?

She probably wanted that in some recess of her heart. She probably wanted an exclusive thing because that's the thing for girls. Like women value exclusivity more than men because men like having sex as many women as will let them have it we as men override base impulses right in the sense that you know we we make sacrifices or make decisions that are not just oh i'd love to spread my seed as wide as i can right we have to do this this is just the rational brain trumping biological you're saying all men without exception just want to spread their seed as wide as they can. What's that called? A straw man, I think. Yes, it is.

Alright, you keep that shit on lockdown. Have another glass of your fucking balloon wine over there. We'll do, we'll do, we'll do. I really think I had a couple of Filthy's delicious beers right now Yeah you probably do man

What were you saying Filthy? Before I straw man you? Oh sorry continue Filthy But the point being that like why Isn't the benefit of the gout given the other way too right? Yeah okay so maybe like biologically Maybe and there this is Evo psych and evo psych is something I actually have

Background and you know PhD level background In and there is a shit ton of controversy in evo psych as it is so when we say this this is yeah evo psych is very un-pc it's very un-pc and it's very hotly contested so yes we don't we don't know where the fuck that shit stands there's no there's no like no one has decided on that shit yet so even if assuming, even if we work with that assumption that that is right, you still got to give them the benefit of the doubt in the sense of, cognitively, you can put that shit aside. So yeah, okay, maybe biologically women have, I mean, this is Triberr's argument, right? This is, you know, to give citations for this,

this is sex is evolutionarily more costly for women than it is for men right all the the bearing a child is just biologically more costly for women so you're saying women are worth less after they have a baby i don't think that's they have to deal with a lot more potential i'm sorry i'm just fucking with you you just described it as costly i don't carry on no but okay but the point being being that like from this, like even if we agree with that, there's going to be women that are out there, women who like to fuck. That's just how it boils down to. And the society is much more forgiving of this now than it's ever been in the past, right? Women are allowed to be sexual people without this being the end all be all of slut shaming. This is the end of it.

So I don't know that i can get behind that i mean i can i can hear your point taylor that there may be situations and there are probably lots of situations where one of those members male or female and maybe even predominantly female i have no idea what the research looks like on this is actually wanting more than that but i also believe you could have an equitable friends with benefit relationship where both people just want to fuck you absolutely can that's true yeah like that's i don't think that's even debatable because it's happened like that's definitely true um yeah i think my point from earlier was more what you you perfectly elucidated it yeah so we're on the same page

there well we agree holy shit we can yeah it i think it's mostly women all right who want the relationship potentially but there's also a plethora of examples where both people are just like i'm in it for myself if this ends so be it and i know and i've got some dudes in my life who are desperate dudes who need to get fucking laid like the best thing that could happen in their life not only from their own perspective but from everybody else's perspective is holy shit someone fucked that guy so he will stop barking up every female tree that he sees stop being this ridiculous human being all around because he is just so his so much of his self-worth is tied into getting laid and those fucking people and those those are men and predominantly my my experience it that. It's all men. That's all men.

Yeah. Are you saying that's every man, or that's only men? That's mankind. I think he's saying that all of them are men. I articulated that poorly. It's not all men who are like that, but that group, that subsection of people is only male. And that's totally true. Because if you're a guy and you're not getting laid it almost feels like the people around you

can can feel that you know like if you're in a dry spell and you're not feeling up to snuff like you almost feel like people discern that there's something off about you but they that's just a male thing because women can get laid whenever they want frankly like they can like it may not be you know brad pitt but you know it's way easier for a woman to find a dick than it is for a guy to find a vagina yeah that comes at trade-offs right that's why the reason you said that you said earlier is because the overwhelming cost of pregnancy lies on women and so naturally you are going to be way more if i could get pregnant and have to carry a baby i'd be way more selective about who I fucked

because it's like, okay, this could be potentially a child of mine and I want to make sure that it has the best genes, that it's healthy. It's not just biology either. I feel like it's also cultural. There's definitely a double standard here, the whole stud versus slut thing. When a girl adds a number to her count, there's a certain cost to that. When a guy does, there's none.

Yeah. She has an odometer on her ass. Keep that between you and yourself. She'll just go until it rolls over. The suggestions you were giving the person who asked the question, I came into this a little bit late. I want to hear

what the essay is about this. It's worth talking about the repercussions of pregnancy with a sex partner even if it's a friends with benefit partner ahead of time because it makes a hell of a lot of difference for me going into something like this if i know her viewpoint on abortion her viewpoint on what happens if shit fucks up and you get pregnant what are we going to do about this what you know it's not a sexy talk to have it's not like that's not first date talk generally you know that's not like you know oh we're about to roll into bed hey hold on a moment but shit sometimes it maybe ought to be that because that's useful to know because if you run into individuals who for religious beliefs beliefs

or other reasons are not willing to abort a child and the child is conceived with no expectation no desire from that from either parent. I mean, that's at 22, that's a huge life-changing event. And like, that's avoidable. That's avoidable with some discussion in a large part. So I don't know. I remember my Skype message, like your status. For a long time, it was being pro-choice is a quality

I look for in a woman. And it was Kyle's, it was a quote I look for in a woman. It was Kyle's. It was a quote from Kyle. Kyle's status, yeah, right? Very important. I mean, it's a huge thing. I need to know that we're on the same page on this major, major decision that's going to affect.

Nothing else really affects you that way that another person is going to get to say yay or nay on. You don't think about it going into that because we all want to get laid say yay or nay on like it's you don't think about it going into that because we all want to get laid but it's like you really need to know that like if this condom fails that your life isn't over now because you might not have sex if you thought it would be because they always say 99 like like who knows what that never even fucking means in practical use if you're using correctly but but i i think a lot of guys are stupid i think a lot of people are stupid and they don't know how to rip all the time

but you can always tell when they do what he was suggesting earlier like never never have we ever style shit for just like shits and giggles for this but i'm like like not joking around for a second how many people have a condom break on them like i've had a fucking condom break on me during sex never a lot of many times yeah seriously when i was a teenager i didn't know like today it's like whoa this is getting better but teenage woody like didn't know yeah uh the only reason you don't have a lube i've found and then it's like it's like wow it's like whoa wait a minute something just happened but um no i don't think I've ever broken a condom Jesus I've broken a number

of condoms I mean condoms are practically broken just by the time they stretch over my baby's arm of a ginormous cock you're like I break two or three just putting one on oh yeah it's stretched and it's tensile straight

just to start with it's shaking and it's tensile strength just to start with. It's shaking. It's shaking from the tension on your thigh. She's shaking. It's shaking. Oh yeah. Dozens of videos of people putting seven gallons of water in one and even it around and it's fine. No dice.

People put them over their head, but not that head, baby. No dice. People put them over their head, but not that head, baby. I tried. I had a condom break like that on me three times in college. My freshman year, we had a bunch of condoms, and they were just unlooped. You know those kinds they give you for free when you're in college? That's bullshit. Where it's like, hey, take this one-choice condom.

The package is round. The package is round. Yes, I was about to say. The package is round. It's got four perforated semi semi corners, like weird little garbage things. And we thought like it would be funny to like put it over our head. My friend, my friend Zach got it over his head. We laughed.

My friend John, who was in the dorm next to me, put it on his head and we laughed. My head was too big for three condoms. I tried the first one, just no chance. Tried the second one, bailed out halfway across this vast cranium of wine. And then the third one I had Zach try and put on, like, alright, let's get this. It'll be a funny picture

for our Facebook or whatever. And he tried to put it on, he got it, like, rolled down to here, and then just, pop! You can't get over this melon with those weak ass condoms like now you understand how my cock feels but i actually everything behind me is actually 30 feet in the background it's only my head that makes it look in proportion i didn't realize i don't remember if it was pka or pkn but kyle went to that closet behind him which all of us had

previously thought was like 15 feet away. He can practically reach it with the length of his arm. He was blown away when he did that, when he goes I'm going to go to that closet, and he stood up and took one and a half steps, and then bent down and reached into it. Yeah, like he's touching it.

I was under the impression that was far away. I don't know why. Forced perspective, I guess. This is a really tiny room. We're in a real state of flux. I also thought that was a French flag. A French flag? No, it's Russian.

I know, because it's hanging the other way. Yeah. Yeah. To kind of like... Man, I'm drunk. ...that topic for a second. I'm drunk, too. You guys are a little tipsy?

Filthy, how are you feeling? I'm feeling good, man. I'm feeling good, too. I could do this all night. Filthy, we watch your streams. Oh, Filthy, I actually watched some of your... Because you know, last time you were on, I wasn't very into Civ. Yeah, you were

very against Civ. I was very against it. Mostly to be funny, because... No, I didn't take it personally. No, that's not what I'm saying at all. But yeah. Kyle got me into it, trying to, like, play in Civ V more. I'm really enjoying Russia as my main Civ that I'm playing more, because I really, I can't tell if you're... No, no, so fucking, no, no, no, not at all.

It's such a great Civ. One of the most fun Civs to play. I feel like it gives you a huge advantage to just have all those like gimme resources that sometimes you're like, oh, God damn it. I have to trade some cotton for some iron because I'm in deep shit and he's getting the way better trade. And I don't like that. But it seems like with Russia, even if you have a giant expanse and you only have one uranium, you can milk that for quite a bit with Russia. But basically, I read a couple guides on Russia, and it says you want to build, I think, tall or build high is the name of the term, where you have

fewer cities, but very high population and very high number of tiles, and you use your Krepost or whatever to buy them. I've been on this show a number of times. This is fourth or fifth, I think, right? I've played a couple games of Civ now with Kyle and Chiz, and if you ever want

to just learn Civ and you have some time, just reach out to me and we'll make some time and I'll teach you about that shit. I teach Civ to people all the fucking time, so don't read some shitty guide on the internet. You literally have I mean, I don't want to be a pretentious prick about this, but you have one of the best players in the

world right here and I'd be more than happy to tell you about it so don't read some shitty guide about you know some guy wants you to build a cray post in Russia it's not my guide I have never ever said with Russia go tall and build a cray post because this dick dick fucking device it doesn't mean anything so no it doesn't mean anything he's playing the vanilla game though he's not playing the in q mod which is in part why i'm just saying that like i thought like okay in my novice head it made a lot of sense when they were like russia what you want to do is cover as much expanse as possible with all your cities by buying those tiles for cheap to make sure that you're monopolizing all of those, I think, strategic resources.

So you're monopolizing all the strategic resources so you build, like, whereas if I was playing a different Civ, I'd build way closer when I went Liberty, which I tend to go Liberty now. I think I like that one the most. But with Russia, it was like, put your city a little further away than you would normally to where their, like, growth patterns wouldn't

intersect ever, and then just buy up that area, and then through the late game, you just absorb a huge amount of the map. I'm really enjoying the game. I like the Cossack, the Cossack, however you say it. That's a great unit. Charge promotion is fucking phenomenal.

The Shoshone have been the one I've been playing with recently, because they start with a huge... I think it's Shoshone. It's one of the Indian type. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The giant starting place, and then also every time you get on a route... It's Shoshone or It's one of the Indian tribes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, the giant starting place. And then also, every time you get on a route.

It's Shoshone or Shoshone, by the way. I went out to Nevada, where that tribe is actually based and still there now. Like, they're alive today. Like, they are our people. And, like, five minutes down the road from each other, it's Shoshone or Shoshone. So, who the fuck knows. Like Missouri and Missouri. Yeah.

Yeah, I think exactly like that, Taylor. Exactly like that. But the Shosh Yeah, I think exactly like that, Taylor. Exactly like that. But the Shoshone, I really like them. And every time you get a ruin or an excavation site, whatever it's called, you get to pick what benefit you get. And I don't know which one's the best, but I've been just going with the population added and then the tech because you usually get at least two.

But I'm really liking Civ. I like playing the single player because I can play 15 turns and then just shut it down. It probably says that I've played Civ for three months and I've only had the game downloaded for like three months and four days because it's constantly open. I'll just pop in, play two turns, leave.

I do like that aspect of the turn-based game. It's nice that you can pop in obviously you do multiplayer where you just dominate a bunch of people like me but yeah i really like it i'm glad i'm glad you've been i think it's a sweet game uh civ 6 is out in like 10 days civ 6 i've had some access to the pre-release and uh that's been pretty fucking fun i can't wait to see what the multiplayer looks like that. But if you like the single player element, if you like the single player element, you like the playability,

just pick it up and do what you want and come back to it later. Civ VI is going to be as good for that. I watched one of your guide videos for Civ V a while back trying to get into it, so I just picked a random one where it was like, you know, Aztecs, game 9000. And I was like, all all right and i started watching it

and maybe 20 minutes in i'm like this is like me listening to a like a rocket science lecture where i could be like ah this sounds like a lot of things but i wouldn't leave it anything else and i was watching it and i'm like okay what's he, he clicked too fast there. I don't know what he did. Taylor, I'm not talking with you. I would happily be here. I would take it over and happily be here. I anticipate he's currently researching pottery. And the fact that I know that he's researching pottery,

oh, yeah, looking at there, he's got a cotton near him. That means he's going to have a lot of good fabrics later in the game. And then I'm like, damn, I'm already five steps behind. I have no idea. I just wanted you to say, click to build the monument. Do that. I'm serious, man.

I've played with Chiz and Kyle a little bit, and I would be happy to do some sort of tutoring for that. Because Kyle and I are clearly equals now because I beat him in some throwaway game. Kyle's much better at beating this game. You were

even explaining courteously throughout the game ways to help me get better as I was beating you. And that shows a lot of... He was like, should I attack now? And I'm like, well, if you press F9 you'll see that clearly. Yeah, you should, because I can't do much about it,

because I went aesthetics in the vanilla game for some reason, because I thought it'd be funny to beat you with aesthetics. It's a social policy tree. You had the best-looking capital I conquered. It's about tourism winning so winning like a cultural victory so it's not military oriented at all so if your opponent is russia for example building cossacks and pushing you with cossacks and artillery and you're going aesthetics you might might not be real thrilled about that that's exactly what happened i took it really not

seriously at all do you think that in civ 6 and did not stop. Our war went on for millennia. I want to ask this. Do you think that in Civ 6, they'll have the multiplayer bugs worked out? Like, there were a lot of problems with people dropping and games being hard to recover. And it's hard to just play it.

It really is. Even now, it's years old and still so buggy, it's hard to play a multiplayer game. Yep, and there's a specific Steam group dedicated exactly to that, to playing multiplayer games, because it's so fucking hard to play a multiplayer game yep and there's a specific steam you're dedicated exactly to that to playing multiplayer games because it's so fucking hard to get a full game of that i don't know is the answer um the the longer answer is we've been i have access to a civ 6 uh preview pre-release build of civ 6 and i've had access to this for about

two weeks three weeks now something like that and i got flown out in um july to go to a uh pre-release yeah i got flown out to new york it was great like vip treatment picked up in a limo this type of shit right phone drummed a real limo like a genuine limo oh no limo service so it's like yeah they always tell me like oh there'll be a limo there and then it's some van with like a sweaty guy anyway my my drivers were nice and that was a first for me so i was pleased with the whole experience as a whole and i really fucking enjoyed it as a whole uh but i've had access for a little while now basically it's a long long and short of that and we've been promised they've told us that a they're making this more modder friendly that was one of

the things they've said specifically and b that multiplayer was going to be something they actually they didn't say quite this words but the take home is that they gave a shit about now whether or not we'll see that i don't know at one point i was told by one of the pr guys that they might be doing a multiplayer event before release we're 10 days away from release now it's almost on it's almost unbelievable that would actually occur but the fact that they're even thinking that way suggests there's some some preference they're thinking about that a little bit they've said in the past now as well that they want the multiplayer games to be shorter so it's more accessible for more people.

So my hope is that the code will be better for multiplayer because the code in Civ V Multiplayer is pretty poor. In the end, the truth of the whole thing is going to be that the highest level of play is going to be on a modded version of the game. It's going to be a no-quitters mod. It's going to be played on that Steam group, and you and

a handful of other guys are going to be among the best in the world at it. There's no other way for it to go, really. Because regardless of what they make, there's going to be a way to mod it and make it better. We can say this to the viewers right now. The 11th edition of the NQ mod.

Yeah, 11th edition of that, and the balance is still not where i'd like it still i didn't like the 11th i'm still playing 10 yeah but one of the things that um came out of this um shit i just blanked entirely what i was gonna say on this um nq mod civ multiplayer civ 6 their new focus the highest level yeah yeah that should all jog it. Holy fuck. I'm good at this. I hate that. I hate that when you just blank entirely. No, not yet. Not yet. Multiplayer Civ 6 World Treatment,

their new focus. They give a shit about it now. Modding the game. Modding the game. While we're thinking. Give me two seconds. Here's a fun game. It's a drinking game you may have heard of. Give me two seconds. Here's a fun game. It's a drinking game you may have heard of. Drink while you think. Everybody, up.

Kyle, another shot? So I switched beers. I'm over to New Holland's Dragon Milk. It's a bourbon barrel aged stout. It's fucking delicious. It's something I would not pursue. But it's good to know. Imagine you're drinking that.

That you're drinking right now. And it's good to know. Imagine you are drinking that, that you're drinking right now, and it's exactly nothing like that. Oh my god, that sounds great. You know what? In all honesty, I'm too drunk to lie. Shout out to Club W, because this balloon ship based wine is the best

balloon ship based wine I've ever had. Kyle, do you need another shot? Another shot of... They do this... He's clearly trying to talk. Kyle, do you need another shot? Another shot of... They do this... I'm clearly trying to talk to Kyle, but they do this questionnaire where they ask you, like, what things you like.

But it's not about wine. It's about, like, what do you like? How do you like your coffee? How do you like your steak? How do you like this? How do you like that? Do you like asparagus? And they didn't do a bad job

at guessing which wine I might like. So, that's good. And you've been ignoring that, right? Because you're just like, fuck wine. I don't like wine right right but this one's better i'm still in that kind of immature camp i really i've never had a wine like there's i've had beers where i'm like this is really good like i really like this

but i've never had a wine where it was anything more than like yeah i'll have this like this is this is all right i just especially. I really want to like red wine because I feel like it's cultured and that's a cool thing to order when you go out to a steak dinner and be like, ah, get me the Pinot Grigio. Or no, that's white. Pinot Noir. I was going to call you on that.

I know you were. It's so fucked up anyway. The wines I've enjoyed the most, going out to some fancy dinner, we're a girl and a goat in downtown Chicago or something with the wife. Our favorite restaurant. We go here for special occasions.

It's all small plates and blah, blah, blah. We're all there enjoying the fuck out of it. We get some wine. The waitress recommends it. I'm drunk, so I don't give a fuck. Yeah, we'll get that wine, whatever. We order it, and it's great. We love it.

And then we write the name down, look it up, go back home. We bought it for 55 at the restaurant or something. It's 16 in the stores. And we try it at home and it's all right, but it's not great because the fucking experience of being there, being out at her favorite restaurant, she's having a great time, I'm having a great time, we're all a little bit buzzed.

It's like nine-tenths of the flavor of that wine compared to the actual wine. Well, then the experience of PKA is ruining this Chandon. Let's read the synopsis. At Chandon, we are the true California pioneers founded in 1973 by Mote and Shandon. Mote has an umlaut over the E, so you know he's foreign, which means he knows wine.

We draw on our French heritage and innovative American spirit to create vibrant and sophisticated sparkling wines that enliven all occasions. I got Russian and French out of that. Oh, you got whatever I was giving you out of that.

Well, if you do it in Russian, if you give a wine review in Russian accent, it sounds very cheap. This is the finest red wine in all of Russia, not only because Putin outlawed all sale of red wine who do not like. Yeah. I can tell everybody's getting a little drunk.

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of 30% off your entire order when you go to... 30%? Holy smokes. That's a lot. Kyle, can you reread that? That has to be a mistake. 30%! So you just go to the, T-H-E, Tracker.com and enter offer code P-K-A. The hardest thing you'll ever have to do is find

their website. That's thetracker.com right now and enter offer code pka the hardest thing you'll ever have to do is find their website that's the tracker.com right now and enter offer code pka for 30 off your entire order again it's tracker.com uh promo code pk 30 your wife that's gonna be a grievous we're not allowed to talk about that i was actually thinking like i don't know maybe i'm a terrible person but i'm like not to talk about tracking people. It's something they're not comfortable with. I wasn't thinking anything. No, the thing with tracker is... I don't know if this is what you're supposed to use it for, but I keep wanting...

Is it tracker, like T-R-A-C-K-E-R, or is it Tracker, T-R-A-C-K-H-E-R? It's not that. It is not that. It's T-R-A-C-K-R. Now, they do have the ER domain, too, but clearly their branding is all built around the lack of the E. T-R-E-C-A-K-R. I keep one eaten up.

I don't know if this is, like, the actual use, but I think it's a great use. I keep one hidden somewhere in my trunk so that if someone were to steal my car, I would have a much better chance of getting it. There you go. I think that's a solid idea. Tracker.com, Kyle is exasperated. Woody is drunk, leaning with Mike all the way down. And me and Filthy here. Carrying the conversation

I feel like. I guess to cap off Civilization talk, I'm really loving Civilization 5 right now, and the more I watch Civilization 6 gameplay, the less excited I am about it. I don't like how it looks. What's that? Opposite for me. Really? Okay, well good, because you're

the one playing. I've been pleased with it actually good i'm restricted on civ 6 right now with the preview release that i have to prince ai and prince ai is basically like if you're if my wife was playing civilization 5 like civilization 6 like you know the woman who like ran herself into a corner and couldn't get out again in the last game we played like that would be like that would be for this game like it's hopeless so i'm excited about harder ai yeah i play on immortal or or deity if i want to challenge but but anything less like even king you're just getting every uh um every wonder everything you want yeah there's no point in playing so that's what i don't like about civ

single player is that i i can turn the like i was playing against uh i guess we were playing against emperor or immortal what's the higher one kyle immortal mortal is higher than i guess at one point kyle and i were doing like 2v2 immortal or something and it wasn't that hard maybe that's because i have the benefit of having kyle who's very good at the game on my team but also it's like when i play single player it's like i don't want the benefit the other team gets to be one that where they just intrinsically have more resources i want the difference to be that they are more strategic they're more tactical they're better at moving their units they're more uh i guess focused in their goals to where it's like oh fuck i can tell i'm playing against an immortal enemy because they're really pushing this point on my empire keep in

mind i'm saying this as though i understand the game fully i don't but that makes the most sense to me does that is that kind of the page you're on ai is really shitty you know really hard to code the ai that you want like the difference smart and dumb like that's hard to pull off it's way easier to just make every bullet worth more CSGO against AI for any reason I never have no why the fuck would you do that to yourself it's pointless wait why would you want play CSGO against AI oh no yeah that'd be right fucking stupid same with Civ like there's a point to playing the DDAI like learning the game sure if you're getting into it and just enjoying that element fine but as soon as you get to a point on that you're like i want a competent opponent and it's exactly the same in that right competent opponent's not going to be the ai in the games that we're seeing today i've known how to play this game for six weeks and i

can obliterate an immortal ai exactly that's not that i just at that point it's just like, okay, I'm going to go Liberty, I'm going to build these buildings, and then I'm going to fucking, if I'm playing the Huns, another Civ that I fucking love. I really like the Huns because I can end the game quick if you just pump out a bunch of battering rams and a bunch of horse archers and ruin it. I really enjoy the Huns. I'm sure you'll have some insight that says the Huns actually suck.

No, Huns are great. Good. Really? Yep, great Civ. I like the Huns. I'm sure you'll have some insight that says the Huns actually suck. No, Huns are great. Really? Yep, great. The Huns, the Russians... You can start a game off, your scout goes out, or even your opening warrior, whatever, you get a rune and it's going to upgrade you immediately into a battering ram, and if you're close enough to an enemy civ,

another player, even a city state, it'll take a city at that point in the game One-on-one, the battering ram. One-on-one, the battering ram. One-on-one, your battering ram versus city. It'll take that city in two, maybe three hits, and unless they've got, like, they really need two units to properly stop you

from just taking the city. They gotta get that unit. They gotta keep the battering ram away from the adjacency to the city. If it gets adjacent to the city in the early game, it's just done. It's hilarious. Taylor, if you get into it, same with you. I offer the same to the city in the early game, it's just... Yep. Done. It's hilarious. Taylor, if you get into it, same with you. I offer the same to you, Kyle, in that sense. I know we played a game. Actually, Kyle is 1-0 versus

me. I am. I am. Kyle is 1. I'm happy to give you a chance to try to... It took me 3-0 and 4 peons to suicide into the all-game, but nevertheless he is 1-0. That was a frustrating game to play.

I am 1-0 against Kyle. Kyle is 1-0 against Filthy. Yup. I am the best Civ player in this game. Exactly. I think logically that is the only conclusion we can reach. Did you spill wine? Maybe. Logically, that is the only conclusion we can reach. Did you spill wine? Maybe. Balloon White is down.

Mayhaps. The essence of a rose or something is his next backup plan? Basically, Filthy, give me the quick run. I want to talk about Civ a bit longer because I'm enjoying this. I can do it all day. to talk about a bit longer because i'm enjoying this i can do it all day russia china england huns and shoshone shoshone whatever are probably my five that i like the most right now any of those that need to be dropped from the lineup no they're all tier two so of all the civs out there if i rate them on a one to six they're're all 2s. You keep England a 1, though. Because that's part of what I used.

I used your guide to pick stuff, because I was like, Filthy knows this shit. So what's tier 1? He's a stand-up guy. What's tier 1? Poland. Babylon. Is England tier 1? I don't remember. See, the problem is when I made the guide video for

the ratings on these, this was two years ago, probably, and this was pre-mod. Yeah, pre-mod. And now the mod has changed all these things, so my ratings of these mentally are now different than the ratings on the guide video. So if you're just playing Vanilla, take the guide video. The guide video's pretty

good. Not a lot has changed in Vanilla since I made that guide video, so that shit is right up there so if england was tier one i think was england tier one or tier two that it doesn't matter england's an amazing civ all those civs you listed are really really good civs so if you want to play those and get regular playing with those that's great they're all really strong this is something i have trouble understanding is what is it about a civ like russia that like from a layman when i read like you get double strategic resources i understood that to mean I can build whatever the fuck I want with iron, with uranium, with all this stuff.

I'm taking this sieve. And they have a cool horse rider with a gun. That's fine, too. Why? Like, what about that is not tier one compared to, like, Poland? Because I know Poland gets the free social policy, but... Policies. but policies yeah that's really fucking good so don't compare it to poland compare it to one of the other tier ones like babylon okay like what makes babylon science so russia has a in the base vanilla game russia has a tundra start bias which means that a disproportional number of time you

will start in tundra land and tundra is just shitty so tundra has limited so like a tundra someone give this man another drink asap i don't know like last the first time so the very first time you guys sent me on pka we did a lot of civ talk and some of your fans were very adamantly against it so anytime we want to be cut short on civ talk i'm quite happy to do other topics i'm also quite happy to answer civ talk i do a lot of civ talk for my you know the rest of my profession so the tundra bias is a problem with russia um the the inconsistency of it right so russia has a bonus for plus one production off of strategic resources that's iron uh that's that's horses early game is iron and horses later on it's aluminum, that kind of shit, right? You're at the mercy of RNG,

of random number generation, in terms of how many of those spawn in your empire. So the problem, why it's a tier two as opposed to tier one, is because for me, consistency is part of that ranking. If your civ is always good, it's going to be a tier one. If it's sometimes good based on the situation, and that bonus is really good based on the situation it's going to be tier 2 in Russia basically what it works out to be is that

Russia has really great bonuses but they only come into play some of the time when you spawn Russia you spawn in the tundra you don't have any fucking horses, you don't have any fucking iron and it's just like sad days for ages and that's just RNG so it's not consistent enough to be a tier 1

that makes sense so the start bias is kind of the detracting factor to it that start bias and the fact that the bonuses are based on strategic resources and strategic resource spawns are random okay oh they're random well i mean you can play with this yeah strategic balance is a setting that is a setting that i we play on an all competitive multiplayer you play on strategic resource with guarantees at least one horse and one iron the capital which is good yep but but still you can have capitals with four horses and two iron and then if you want to go magnificent if you want to have a magnificent capital if you're playing single player especially because

you can just restart you know move your capital because that iron is going to be within what two hexes of your capital always if If you settle on iron as Russia, as soon as you discover iron working, all of a sudden your cap is doing like four hammers and two food or something instantly. It makes the early part of the game, and I mean the really, really early part of the game where you're building

scouts and settlers and workers, it makes it much, much smoother. So much better. And I thought that's why you liked Huns too, because Huns have the same bonus. Huns have a production bonus towards pastures and you're if you have strategic resource on you're guaranteed one horses in your capital just like you are with russia so if russia's russia horses are plus one with hans horses for the pasture are plus one and they get plus uh oh fuck i'm trying to remember the other hans bonus they oh they start with animal husbandry which probably isn't a big deal,

but I feel like that's a huge deal because it starts you out one little echelon above everybody else where suddenly you can go right into pottery and not think about it or something. Maybe that's stupid. Pottery first anyway. Don't doubt yourself, Taylor.

Taylor, don't put yourself down. That's not stupid. That's a great thought. Thank you. You know what? What do you think? You know what? I take back. It wasn't put yourself down. That's not stupid. That's a great thought. Thank you. You know what? What do you think? You know what? I take back.

It wasn't a stupid thought. Woody told me it was good. He has degrees. But, yeah, I like the Huns. China, I really – when Kyle told me that the best, not famous person, but notable person, whatever it's called, where you pick one, he said to go with prophet because you can start the religion. And I realized that's the best one to start.

And then maybe you pick it as the second time so you can augment your religion. But I really like picking generals all the time to get – I don't do it, but I always get the two profits first, but after that I just go all general when I get to pick one because I feel like the general gives huge bonuses and then you can just set up the general and be like, yeah all these squares, all these hexes that are in your area

they're mine now, fuck you I like that, I think that's a great, is that wrong? Should I be getting artists? It's impolite It's impolite. It's impolite. You are an impolite Civilizations player, so suck a dick, Taylor.

The answer to that depends on the game you're playing. If you're playing a 1v1 or a 2v2, if you're playing 1v1 versus Kyle, generals are extremely valuable because they can often decide whether or not you can defend a city at all. If you have one general up on your opponent and you're pushing a city and it's a 1v1 scenario,

that's extremely powerful. What do you mean pushing a city? Pushing a city, capturing. So, you play cities for... Okay. You guys, this is your show. If we're doing too much Civ Talk, you stop. If you keep asking me Civ questions, I will answer them.

This is the last Civ question, and then we'll move on. I approve of that call. Just so you know, I love it. I could do four hours of just Civ Talk. I literally play... Just for the audience. Me too! I have a huge passion for the game, and so I'll watch your games because

they're incredibly educational. Not because of the reason that YouTube videos are normally educational. Normally, like when I was learning Company of Heroes, for example. I don't know if you ever played that. It's very fun. It's a World War II top-down RTS. But with that, there are very good build orders that you should probably stick to. Your first 8 or 12 moves are kind of concrete.

But with Civ, it's so situational that every time I have to read the board, read my Civ, read my opponents, and then go from there. That's why I love Civ, and that's why I love watching your videos, because I get to see how you react in dozens and dozens of unique instances, and I feel like every time I watch one of your videos, I get a bit better.

Well, as I said, I'm happy to individually coach you guys if you want any sort of that. I'd love to do it. I'll be knocking on your door, filthy robot. Yeah, not you. Woody, just to be clear, the offer wasn't to you. It was to everyone else in this call except you,

just so we're clear. You're not even included in it. He won't play with you. All right, but to answer the question, Taylor, it works like this, right? A lot of the defensiveness of a city is based on its terrain. And you want to, when you settle a city, you settle a city based on the

terrain that it takes with it. So you can put up a position when you're fighting other players that can't move into that because the terrain is too unfavorable for them that you can get huge advantages from that. Citadeling, so what you're talking about is planting a great general, turns them into a citadel, citadel steals land. You can totally negate the terrain advantage and make it your own advantage so having

more generals than your opponent allows you to take a impossible situation and make it into extremely positive situation for you so what i like about it is that you can like where that hex is where the citadel is placed you can just go with another general, one hex next to it, and then build another one, and then you steal even more land closer to their capital, and you just throw an artillery right in that protective citadel, and then you have the city destroyed, right? To be clear, in vanilla game, tradition is way better than liberty, unless you're dueling.

If you're dueling someone, liberty is better than tradition. So it's interesting that you prefer a liberty build, because a liberty build is essentially a war build when you're playing against players. By interesting, he means stupid. Yeah, by interesting, he means, you idiot. You shouldn't be picking that. No, I didn't. Yes, you did.

I feel like liberty makes the most sense because I don't like ruining. Like, I like building gigantic cities and winning the population battle. Like, I like having a gigantic population. And we're talking about Civics again. Filthy. What is the proudest moment of your life thus far? The proudest moment of my life thus far? This is a $10 Patreon question, so take it seriously.

Are you kidding me? so take it seriously. Are you kidding me? Someone paid $10 to ask you this question. What is the proudest moment of your life thus far? Can we stop for a second and appreciate the current posture of Woody? I think this is hilarious.

A little bit into it. Not a little bit. This is like fucking three hours. Four fucking hours! Yeah, four hours of drinking. All right, assholes. I'll answer this question. I'll answer this question. I'll answer it in the...

With the truth. Like, I won't make a joke of it. I will absolutely try to answer this to the best of my ability. There's $10 on the line here. Of course you won't make a joke of it. Carry on. It's probably when my wife said yes when i asked her to marry me that was your proudest moment i think so that's really sweet

i don't understand it it's bad that i was gonna say she said yes to me first kyle cannot drive right now kyle kyle is beyond the legal limit of driving we should all see where we lie uh filthy if you had listened to to us before this and no we didn't tell you to buy this of course because chis resets me literally okay i was recording a collaboration civilization 5 video with another streamer uh another another youtuber i was quite drunk at 1 a.m i got a text from chiz who's like hey do you want to be on the show tomorrow it's a drinking stream that's that's the like that's the setup i get so like you know 12 hours later here we are i'll tell you how that happened like like chiz and i were talking about this episode and i was like i was like how many sponsors do we have because we're

gonna be drunk and he's like five maybe six and i'm like shit all right well i'll get him in early i can handle this i'll stay sober enough i'll be i'll be uh i'll be awake and i was like but who's our guest because we can't have someone who's just sitting over there sober i was like who are our drinking guests i was like i was like filthy is the is the way to go and who's that gentleman you had recently who uh he's a big shoe nice shoe nice isn't really as He's a big drinker. Shoenice. Shoenice isn't really as much of a big drinker as he is like a raging alcoholic who eats glue on the internet for a living. Yeah, I can't do that. I won't do that.

No, don't bother. You should stick with the Civ expertise. Stay in there. You're giving us tips about how we can drink certain craft beers to enjoy more. He would be giving us tips on the best deals at Ace Hardware for varnish to cough or drink to get fucked up.

Because he is, I mean, that's his gig. He's very good at eating things that other people don't. Filthy. On the off chance that you make a lot of money on the release of Civ 6, if this enriches you in a way that changes your life consider one tenth of your net worth to be in your annual income and spend no more than that

and then you'll have worth that continues on and you'll be ahead in life one tenth of your net worth is your annual income while you're earning temporary great money and then you can be rich forever, do that I'd like to be rich forever so

that would that would be something i would be interested in that in all right i'll get back to my drinking yeah you said that you're doing a collaboration you're wrong you said you're doing a collaboration i'm going now i'm going out what's happening collaboration with another youtuber i'm curious who was it so i'm I'm working with Arumba07 right now. He's a... Okay, you know him? Yeah. Okay, cool.

Well, that works out well. He's a strategy gamer just like I am. I met him when I got flown out to New York for the Civ VI thing. My flight got... So this was fortuitous. We had a... So, Woody, you might enjoy this.

We had a debate. Oh, really? Go ahead. Yeah. Me and Arumba? Go. I know, right? You're like passed out. You're like, I'm ready for Minnesota this. We had a debate. Oh, really? Go ahead. Yeah. I know, right? You're like passed out. You're like, I'm ready for this.

Hold on. Hold on. I'm ready for more Civ Talk. So I got flown out to this event and it was a day event. And I went out and I went out with like a T-shirt, this T-shirt actually, t-shirt and like my fucking travel bag and like a notebook and that was it. And my flight got canceled so I was stuck in New York for the night. And 2K Games, they were great.

They were like, you know, here we did this event at this hotel. It was the London Hotel in New York. And they were like, hey, we'll put you up for the night. And by the way, we're going to, the PR people were like,

hey, we're going out to dinner. It's going to be two PR people. And oh, this reminds me of what I wanted to say earlier. Fucking great. Perfect. It's going to be two PR people and two YouTubers, Arumbo07 and Quill18, if you guys know them at all. They're big strategy gamer YouTubers. And so I kind of got invited into this dinner that I wasn't expecting to do because my flight got canceled.

And, you know, we were talking that's it and it turns out you know surprise surprise i know a lot about civ and they were other streamers they were there for civ and uh i know i don't want to i don't want to be a dick about this but i know more about something they do i play more stuff than they do right they're more diverse than i am i am more specialized i play a fuck ton of civ close to 5 5,000 hours now or something, right? I'm at like 5,700 right now. I was in your live stream when you crossed four grand. Anyway, carry on. I was in the live stream when I crossed four grand?

I was in your live stream. Oh, you're in the live stream. Okay, cool, cool. So anyway, we had a great dinner. It was just a lot of fun. We did some drinking. It turns out, I don't understand this. It always blows my mind. Here we are, it's blowing my mind again. We're out there. People are telling me Arumba told me after the fact, he's like, I don't drink a lot.

I'm like, what are you talking about? We were with one of the PR guys for 2K Games. His name is Joe Sullivan. He's an Irish guy. And I just assume Irish means they drink a lot. And we were drinking beer all night. And then we went and switched over to whiskey and it was great. I enjoyed the fuck out of it we had a great night

and at one point i had a conversation with a room about luck and i was my argument my premise basically was that you know no matter how prepared you are and you should prepare for shit you should work your ass off to prepare for stuff there's a there's a degree of chance in things that's just how life is sure you know there is you're gonna you're gonna run into like i i was there at that dinner from chance my fight was canceled it wasn't my plan i was out there and i got to meet these people and interact with them and have a great night with them solely because of chance so anyways we had this argument and we were talking about this shit and uh swapped contact information i came back and uh we we decided we'd do some collaboration civ six got this pre-release stuff and arumba and i reached out to each other and

started doing some collaborations. So I've been doing some collaborations with him. I'm teaching him Civ V, and we're learning Civ VI together, and I'm going to bring him to the dark side, which is fucking Civ V multiplayer. Civ V multiplayer is not something that is particularly well-supported, but it's such a fucking blast. So, uh...

I love the frigate map you guys have been playing. Where were you headed when you started this? I thought there was a point point and there was something i was going to like and so far didn't happen oh wait something you're gonna like well the something you're gonna like was the argument of uh i got into an argument with him and he's references multiple times for me that was just i'm drinking i want to debate shit and for him it was it was, oh, this might be offensive or people got annoyed about this. So I thought you might enjoy the element of me getting into a random argument with a stranger

and it not being a particularly personal thing for me. Consider me unsurprised. Yeah, right? I don't know. I like this about me. I enjoy the fact that I'm willing to engage with people on shit like this. Even questions about what's better, new or old money. Well, I don't have new or old money, so fuck them both.

Your position is the opposite of whatever the other guy is. No, it's not. It's not. I'm not a contrarian. That's not my point at all. But my point is to put boundary conditions on this stuff. Yeah, my wife is the same. Anyways. point is to put boundary conditions on this yeah my wife is the same so anyways okay the second half of this ten dollar question which we're taking totally seriously is um another one is

what age do you feel right now obviously you don't have you have your actual age but do any of you feel any younger older than you actually are 18 i feel maybe 24 somewhere in there i'm 30 i would park you down as 24 yeah i feel old enough to uh i feel like i'm i have like um this this layer of responsibility that is crept in where i know that like uh can't do that thing can't do this thing i'm not gonna smash mailboxes anymore not gonna egg any houses but at the same time i would love to be set on fire in a consult in a you know you know a safe uh situation i'd love to put burn gel on myself and just set myself ablaze i still uh we were cleaning out my basement the other day and they found this huge wad of

firecrackers i mean like 5 000 firecrackers and they're like what do you want to do with these i was like what do you think put up with the firecrackers like that's where they go like you don't throw my firecrackers away that's where they go like you don't throw my firecrackers away that's treasure you just found like like i'm still that guy who loves firecrackers and you know i'm hesitant to pick up a gun right now because i'm drunk and that's probably bad pr but you know like guns and that sort of thing yeah i'm still a bit of a kid at heart um but i'm i'm i'm not uh so immature that i'll uh i'll step in shit anymore i feel like i'm there i don't want to see me shoot something on camera watch this no yes well not oh hilarious

i'd say i feel like i'm i mean i'm only 25 so i can't feel that much younger than i am you know i filthy i don't know how old you are i guess a little younger than kyle i'm younger i'm two years i'm 32 you're 32 okay i'll be 33 in a couple months i couldn't tell you see without your beard i bet you have a wonderful face. A wonderful baby face where you look much younger. That's what I was thinking. I look like Alexander Skarsgård when I have no... Alexander Skarsgård! That's right. But I guess 22, 23 is what I feel, because 25 is solidly and mathematically in your mid-20s.

But I still think of myself as like, I'm just a guy in my early 20s. Doing whatever I want whenever I feel like. And that's not a good attitude to have. And so I guess I feel younger. Life is weird, though. I look like I'm 33. But that's fine. I'd say 20.

No, I don't even look that young. My skin, if you guys can see my skin, it is flawless. That is all of those years. It's because you had a nuclear bomb of what is that drug called? Accutane. It's because I basically, literally in that doctor's appointment when I was 13, 14, and I had some acne, my mom was like, Taylor wants Accutane. And the doctor was like, well, honestly, that would kind of be the equivalent of dropping a nuclear bomb on a 7-Eleven robbery. I remember it specifically because that's what he said.

And she was like, that's fine. He's fine with it. She's like that's fine like he's fine like I was like yeah I'm totally fine with it I don't want to have acne I want to be getting laid as soon as possible and took it and I've probably I've had enough I've had pimples I can count on one hand since I've been probably 16 ish like I just I do not get pimples. My skin is beautiful. It's huge. It's tremendous.

It's Trumpian. It's Trumpian. It's Trumpian skin. But now it's Trumpian. Trump skin looks like a man's corner of his mouth. It does. They want it because he has star skin.

Trump's neck looks like... Have you ever seen what a snail or slug looks like as they're contracting before they move forward? It's a very sexy image. That is exactly what Trump's neck looked like. When they're sucking up

to slide forward. I probably feel about 22. So I am all over the map on this. I don't have a good answer. I, uh, physically I sometimes feel 43, right? One of the things I've noticed is that

I'm 43. So, um, one of the things I've noticed is like, for example, I was out kiting, I think it was last week. Kiting is this big paramotor wing above your head, and I'm practicing to work it by hand. And it's kind of like doing pull-up-related monkey bars type stuff for an hour or two. And I was sore for like three days. Like three days later, that's how much time it took before I stopped feeling like I'd

stopped doing pull-ups for a few hours. It was like, oh, that really sucks because the 17-year-old version of me would have been fine by dinner. The 43-year-old version of me is sore for a couple of days. The physical side of it is undeniable. Emotionally, I'm all over the map. I feel qualified to have a 17-year-old daughter. You know, she does things. I count her, et cetera, et cetera. I mostly feel like I know what I'm doing. So that's a thing. On the other hand, I very much have, like, reckless impulses that I would have as a teenager.

You know, like, I want to do this. I want to do that. I'm laughing at this. I still think this is funny. So, like, emotionally, I feel like you add some wisdom, but you don't really change your personality. But physically, there's no stopping the aging process. I want to just like chime in on that because that's exactly how I feel in the sense that it's like, you know, like emotionally, I feel like, you know, I want similar things to what I wanted when I was 18. Like I laugh in some sense. I wanted when I was 18 like I like I laugh

in like some sense like I've asked my wife about this sometimes it's just like I feel like what I was reaching for then I haven't really changed in that like maybe I have like maybe this a little bit more concrete in terms of you know what I want for like financial goals or what I want for living goals or something like that but in large part like the things I wanted then like I keep getting older physically I get older my body ages i age i continue through life i garner experience which is great you know i get smarter about things as i've learned this shit but in some sense i'm like i i don't like mentally i don't look back and go fuck i feel a lot older than my 18 year old self i feel a lot wiser than my 18 year old self but i

don't feel a lot older and i feel like age is one of those things that sneaks up on you because you don't fucking feel like you're getting older as this shit occurs to you. You know, it's just you do. You're like your body ages, your things, things move on. But like, I want the same things. Like, I'm still it's the same things make me happy in a large part. Sex and money. Yeah.

Yes. That's not far off in the sense of like success. You know, sex, certainly, you know, that type of stuff. Like, that's not a surprise. Like, who doesn't want that in some degree? You know know show me the show me the guy who's like i don't enjoy sex i'm kind of like i don't know if i believe you you know what i mean like the thing about money like that sorry go ahead okay i'll go uh the thing about money like my experience with money is not so much the stuff that it gets you. It's the time. Like the only, I've met people who say stuff like, I'm not really interested in money.

I'm not money driven, et cetera. And I get that and I kind of respect it. And I hear where you're coming from. But when you realize you can buy your time, you know, like I spent this afternoon, it didn't work out for me. But I was watching the wind so that I could see if I could launch my paramotor. The answer was no fuck it but i was like man i really prefer this to working for someone else you know like given those two options you know i'm on my phone like reading news or something enjoying the sun and the wind sitting in my golf cart that's a way better way to spend your

afternoon than most alternatives than most people who are probably working this afternoon. I don't know what I'd do with much more money. Once you can buy your time, you've got what you want, to me anyway. That's what you want to buy. I don't disagree at all. I came from a PhD background to this. I was a graduate student, PhD graduate student, and I've been doing this YouTubing for a living now.

I'm not always thrilled with the amount of money I'm making, but fuck, I couldn't be happier doing this. And that to me is like, I mean, yeah, we're going to be cheesy as fuck right now. We're going to say that happiness is invaluable. And I believe that. I've experienced that. The fact of being my own boss,

of deciding what I want to do with my day and making that into something. I still work my ass off. But I'm doing it for me and I'm not doing it because some asshole said you need to be here at 8 a.m. today and you get off at 5 and you need to do this X, Y, Z. I'm doing this because this is something that is going to improve my life and something I can do and I want to do. And that to me is fucking pretty great. Stage one is addicting, which is what I see your description is like, oh, wait a minute.

So like I get the benefit of my time and effort. Holy fuck. Like that's really great. You know, because previously all my time and effort was just someone else got the benefit. You know, I work for this company.

I put my time and effort into that and they benefit from it. And I get, of course a paycheck, but it's not directly linked to my time and effort into that, and they benefit from it, and I get, of course, a paycheck, but it's not directly linked to my time and effort. You know, continued employment is in this indirect kind of way, but you're like, hey, you know what? If I stream for five hours, I make 25% more money

than compared to four hours, and that is an eye-opening thing. It's addicting at first. At first, you're like, oh my god. I want to stream for eight hours. I want to stream for ten hours. Wings of Redemption put up 11 videos one day. 11 videos in a day.

That's a lot of videos in a day. I feel like a lot of YouTubers, when they first discover they're self-employed, go through that phase. Filthy has a serious upload schedule. Does he? I would say 11 doesn't really make me that nervous. Yeah, that'll scare him none. I'll tell you what. So I'm curious.

You call that phase one. What's phase two? And what is the – if we're looking at a phase deployment, we're probably looking at a – we're looking at this progress. So what's the peak of this phase deployment? I mean, I hope you go through all the phases. We're probably looking at this progress. So what's the peak of this phase deployment? I hope you go through all the phases. They're not guaranteed.

But I'm going to make shit up off the top of my head. The next phase is some sort of success. You might feel a self of self-importance. You might feel that, I don't know, like self-importance is a big part of it. You think that you've gotten what you've achieved through skill and not luck. That's a thing that could come if you get yourself to – I don't know what's current. Is 2 million subs a big deal? 1 million subs a big deal?

I don't know what kids are having nowadays. Are you talking YouTube? I am. Or Twitch? I'm like 38,000 or 37,000 on YouTube. So two millions are really fucking big deal for me. For you. Just to clarify.

I don't even know. Like I had a million subs when that was a big deal. I don't know if it still is. Probably is. But at the time it kind of was. Now maybe is. I don't know. But yeah, you might feel like you did this and it was all based on your own skill and achievement and not so much on luck.

And it's a combination of the two, I think, in reality. And if I were to define a final phase, it might be demotivation. You know, like, all right, I've done this. I don't need it anymore. Is that a financial demotivation? Yeah, yeah. And it's funny because it's – You've got to reach a comfort level to be like, I don't give a fuck about this shit anymore.

Because there's got to be a comfort level. Because right now I'm making a living. It's not a great living. It's not a terrible living. But it's certainly not like I'm going to retire tomorrow living. I watched it happen at Cisco too, right? So not so much me or my peers but like my managers' managers. They're like, okay, now I'm worth 38 million.

Why am I still doing this? You know, like, and Cisco as an organization had to, because Cisco, at a time, it was the first or second most valuable company in the world, right? It was an apple at one dime. It was like Cisco and GE were at the very, very top of the world. And Cisco as an organization had to figure out

how to manage people that were no longer motivated by money. No one was like 38 million, oh, if I just had 40 million, things would be cool. No one thought that. They all thought, I'm done. I played ping pong with a guy, or someone played ping pong with a guy. Maybe it was my friend who was telling me about it.

And that guy turned a millionaire that day. He just like yeah you know what I looked at my stock options today I just crossed seven digits I just added another comma to my net worth and this is happening to like regular jack offs that play ping pong because Cisco stock was soaring in the dot com ages so if there's a phase three, I hope it happens to you in Civ 6. I don't know. I hope, though. I wish it were you.

But hopefully you add another. I'm guessing your net worth now has one comma. I hope that you have two. And when that happens, you might wonder, why do I stream every day and subject myself to this? If I had $40 million, I'd never talk to any of you ever again.

That's funny. I like enough of what I do. I'm kidding, of course. But like, if I had $40 million, I would come on to PKA and still do it because I think this is fun. It's fun to joke around and to be... I like making people laugh,

and I sometimes do that here, and that's fun. I get a little high off of people being like, oh, that was really funny when you said that. I don't know what it is, but I get a little high. Like, yeah, it made someone laugh. That's the most visceral, unconscious decision that humans make is laughter. it's unconscious you just start

laughing and so to get someone to laugh for me even in just like daily conversation i i try and be like not like funny to the point that it's obnoxious but just i try and make people laugh throughout my day because it's fun and that feels so there's nothing there's no better feeling than making someone really laugh hard. I love my wife's family for that reason. Isn't that the best? My wife's family likes to laugh. It's so fucking easy to make them laugh.

It's great. That is cool. I very much enjoy that from that. Speaking of which, very relevant. You guys were shit-talking the Blues earlier. If we hadn't had that faux pas at the beginning, we wouldn't have made the show this long. But the Blues are the only team in the NHL that is 2-0 right now. And they make me laugh all the beginning. We wouldn't have made the show this long, but the Blues are the only team in the NHL that is 2-0 right now.

And they make me laugh all the time. So there you go. They make me cry all the time. I'll be right back. Alright. Well, this seems like a good time to tell you guys about Zip Recruiter.

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if you want a job, you can go on there for free. But if you want to get an employee, then they rape the fuck out of you. So to be able to post jobs on there for free, perhaps they wouldn't like that term in their ad, but to be able to post jobs for free is quite the quite the deal zip recruiter.com slash painkiller hire a recruiter you know it's really hard for business owners to find good people because at this point it's like everybody has a degree in at the very least underwater basket weaving and so

anyone can put i have a degree on their applications. ZipRecruiter sifts through the nonsense. They find what you need and only a fool would disregard their option. So there you go. I'm mostly through a bottle of vine. That's a vine. Wine. That seems like a lot of alcohol to me. A bottle of wine! A bottle of wine really isn't as much as you would think. Last time I drank a bottle of wine, I vomited. I remember that. Well, it's October. My last drink was probably New Year's Eve.

Well, Kyle, I would bet that the wine you drank was red. I drank two bottles of Riesling. I remember that. So you probably haven't had a drink in eight months or 10 months no when i learned to fly which was like july or june i had like a sip of moonshine and that broke a streak that was i don't know how long probably since the last that's just so fucking alien to my upbringing woody woody is honestly my favorite kind of person who doesn't drink where it's not a contest it's not about like oh i'm 60 years clean it's more just yeah yeah i'll drink now i know i'm not gonna do it tomorrow whatever

like i what he's attitude alien to me where it's just like i don't like it you know they do these studies with monkeys right they're like there's like three types of monkeys the monkeys won't touch alcohol the monkey is like drinks a little bit and wanders off the monkey like drinks till he passes out i'm the monkey who fucking drinks till he passes out like that's just genetically where i'm at are you talking yeah that's where i am too that's why i stay away from alcohol i'm the monkey that just lets you be you i really want more you know yeah it's not like it's not like i'm pushing that like i'm not saying like we have to do this and i'm not actually saying that i do that i'm not suggesting that i like drink till i pass out every night it's not like I'm pushing that. I'm not saying we have to do this. I'm not suggesting that I drink

until I pass out every night. My body, if I have beer, if I have alcohol, I want to keep drinking alcohol until I'm done with the night. That's just how I respond. I'm the monkey that was concerned the whole time about how many calories are in this one. I haven't even thought of that tonight.

I probably should have. I've been thinking about this the whole time. You drink so many calories tonight. 3,000 calories. I've been thinking about this whole time because I guarantee this is 3,000 calories I've had just sitting here. Because first of all, I didn't have any fucking beer like an asshole. I should have went and bought some before this anticipating.

How would you not do that? Because I didn't think about it. I just thought that moonshine will be enough. Originally, I was going to send everybody one of these, but the shipping was a nightmare. Like, it was just absurd to ship everybody one of these. And I thought, I wouldn't have known that.

When I opened this, and she's like, oh, my God, there's, like, plastic on the top and everything. I was like, yeah. I guess they're running a, Kitty is running a real fucking moonshine business there in georgia we run a couple of stores as well as the beer i'm drinking because this is supposed to be a drugstore i hate to discuss business on the show but send me a bill and have pka reimburse your expenses for this yeah i'll do that because it yeah i thought it was gonna be like a couple bucks but i think it

ended up costing me like a good bit maybe 150 or something like that but a the organization could pay for that not the dude yeah i thought it was pretty cool what do you do with this once it's out like it smells great and i i got the moonshine off of it. It's a nom nom. You got to eat that shit. No, I'm not eating the cinnamon. No, it's absolutely like the fucking worm in a tequila bottle, right? You have to eat it. That works. That's logic.

And just be like, oh, man, this is a surprising flavor. I didn't know what cinnamon tasted like in abundance. What does it taste like? What happens if you – what does it taste like? Chew it a little. It tastes like cinnamon, you fucker. Like, of course it tastes like fucking cinnamon. What do you think it tastes like?

What kind of question is that? It's just, cinnamon will like burn your mouth. It tastes like cinnamon. It tastes like cinnamon wood, and now I've spat it all over myself. Cinnamon wood, see that's descriptive. Like that says something to me beyond cinnamon. Cinnamon, the powder, will make you cough and, like, burn your tongue. So I think the first time you guys found my stream, I think I was doing a drum stream.

I think you were donating Woody to me when I was there. I probably was. I was probably advertising Woody Craft. Yeah, you were, and I was misspelling it, if I remember correctly. But I always felt – dude, so I used to go into popular streams, and I'd drop, like, I don't know, $5, $10, $15, and it would say, like, hey, WoodyCraft's the best multiserver in the multiverse. And to me, in my heart, it was always a win-win. Like, I say a thing, you get some dollars, everyone loved it. Yeah.

Yeah. See, so you were on board with my thought process. I went to a Minecraft stream, had no idea this chick had her own Minecraft server. And I was like, WoodyCraft's the best Minecraft server in the universe. And she's like, oh, we all know that

random unused server is the best in the multiverse. And I was like, I'm so sorry. That's where all the cool kids are. Yeah, I had never heard of it. If anybody actually wants to get into Minecraft, and I will tell you many things. I know a lot of people who do a lot of things about Minecraft. They will go to TrumpianMinecraft.org.

I'm sorry. It's TrumpianMinecraft.biz. It's not biz now, but it's now. Yeah. I don't know who I even went to, but, yeah, one time it burnt me. One time the girl was like, yeah, that was really rude, and I was like, I didn't mean that at all. I didn't realize she had a server. If I did, I wouldn't

have done that. I've done something similar. Occasionally, some big-name streamer, some streamer that I don't generally know is streaming Civ, and sometimes I'll look at my Civ stream, and it'll say, normally Civ streams like 500, 600, maybe 1,000 on a Sunday afternoon. Yeah, it's not bad. That's 1,000 people watching Civ, right? And sometimes it'll say like normally siv streams like five six hundred maybe a thousand on like the afternoon yeah it's not bad that's a thousand people watching siv right and sometimes it'll be

like 15 000 and it'll be because some huge name streamer is out there playing siv and i've tried in the past i've been like i've reached out and been like hey look you know i've tried i've done it by private messages i've done it by messaging their mods i've done it by donating and i'll be like hey look i stream this shit for a living i'd be very happy to do collaborations and teach you how to not be terrible at this because they're universally terrible at this right like that's just how it is like it's a it's they're doing it for like a moment and i've never had any success with that and it just may be the the the the model on that right which is that You've got a big following on Reddit. The guys on Reddit, on the Civ Strategy subreddit,

really all the Civ subreddits. You should have told me about that. Civ Strategy? Yeah, I'm not telling you everything. Even in the game, when he's kicking my ass, I'm like, well, you know, maybe he built a road. You could use a lot of units at once. He just backs you up.

I'll teach you this shit. You'll beat Kyle 100%. Guaranteed. All right. I'm joining the game with Filthy. He's going to teach me the Kyle macros. Anyway, sorry. What was I saying?

Oh, yeah, the subreddit. Yeah, the subreddit. Yeah, when it comes up on the subreddit. So you're like, oh, where should I watch? Where should I go? And there's usually someone who's like look here's how it is and they always inevitably point them in your direction

because you I mean your strategy your you know the tier ranking video obviously has like I don't know 400,000 views or something like that it's really good yeah it's pretty universally accepted as like the ranking list for Civ which is crazy because i i did it like you know i started streaming civ i started

doing this type of stuff on civ because i was in graduate school reaching working for my phd and people were like i would okay i started streaming just kind of like out of the fucking blue and people are like hey could you do something like could you put this on youtube for us and i'm like yeah okay i guess i could put on youtube and they're like could you tell us how to do this and i'm like it seems really simple to me yes i can tell you how to do it it worked out really well worked out really well for that it's weird i'm making a living off that now it's crazy yeah i really enjoy the over explained games because um like i feel like i know 85 90 of what you know but i don't always know

why you're doing the things you do sometimes, the things that I struggle with are late game stuff because you don't have as many repetitions in that, I haven't played as many stealth bomber games, I haven't played as many XCOM games to know that I need Alhambra so I can get blitz

on my XCOM so that I can take cities more efficiently so that's just stuff that i'm that that's the stuff that i learned day in every day every time i watched one of those videos i learned some little micronutrient of uh of information that i didn't know before that those games are so multi-faceted and so fucking complicated that ego the ego in me is super satisfied that i love the fact that I like teaching. I taught for a living. That was part of my job as a PhD student was I taught students. And that was one of the things I actually liked about PhD's profession was I like teaching people.

I'm glad. I'm glad that that comes off that way. And I fucking hope I can do that for Zip6 too. I just want you to teach me how to beat Kyle. I can do that. I will teach you how to beat Kyle. I don't think you can. I don't think you can. It's not beat Kyle. I can do that. I'll teach you how to beat Kyle. I don't think you can. I don't think you can.

It's not that hard. I don't think you can. I think he already has. What is the track record show? Oh, one resounding victory for Taylor. I'll say this. Remember how we had to restart the show, and that was my fault, and I'm really sorry about it? Yeah.

It's why i'm nauseous right now i am so drunk right now you've had half a half a bottle of wine in like two half a bottle it's more than more than half three quarters what do you just not drink and quite for let me be totally honest that i my my concern with this drinking episode was that Woody would not drink. You would go, this is gross. I'm never guilty of that. No, let me give you credit here. I'm complimenting you.

I thought the problem would be, I thought me and Kyle would get pretty drunk and Woody would be like, this is gross. Woody has proven me wrong in spades tonight. I told you he would. Proven me wrong. You did tell me that he would. I literally said, Woody is not known for half-assing things. Woody has proven me would. You did tell me that he would. Woody has proven me wrong. Woody has stuck every step of the way.

I've noticed multiple times where just out of knowing it's a drinking episode, Woody has taken a drink by himself. And that's exactly what this is supposed to be. You totally proved me wrong. You're drinking with the rest of us. I'm good. And I can tell you are pretty drunk. And that's great.

I didn't realize that. I just got up to pee and the walk over to the bathroom. I'm so drunk. Woody, I want to say this. I want to say this clearly. I've done multiple. Because you probably thought you were okay

and then you stood up to walk and you went, oh, a new element has been added to my evening. I've done so many drunk streams on Twitch. Like where I've done alcohol for subscriptions or donations or money whatever the fuck it boils down to and that has always been one of the things that makes it bearable

versus not bearable is i need to get up from time to time because your body sense literally the feeling of your body as you stand up when you're fucking drunk versus not drunk is so important to having any sense of how wet wasted you are yeah you can't do that if you just sit in a chair my wife has done streams where like she's brought me shit those streams have ended disaster because i have no fucking sense of how wasted i am because i'm not moving

i finished all of my uh my strand on for shouldn't have teched for that wonder i mean they're gonna get it out they're gonna engineer it out from under him. He's got the engineering points. He's going to take it. And you're just like, hey, here we go! Yeah, right? This is all... This is... That's a lot of... Probably like two glasses of wine worth in this thing.

The old bottle that was sitting in the fridge for three months. It looks a little yellowy orange. Yeah, because it's very old. I'm gonna pee. It wasn't from one of those fancy cork bottles. It had a screw top.

So Eric has been getting it willy nilly. I've been waiting. I is i know i know this is but you guys are clearly not avid drinkers so i have been doing beer up till now but i just switched to whiskey so this is my first glass of you know whiskey which is kind of whiskey yeah this is knob creek so it's 50 alcohol by volume so so whiskey i so, I feel like the, the PKA crew has answered this question in one form or another a million times. But for you,

if you could go back in time and change one thing, what would you change? That's hard, man. That's so hard. Like these, these type of questions, like you can give it a lot of thought.

You can keep an awesome answer. If you're doing it off the top of your head, it's fucking less awesome. So while you're thinking, like my typical answer on this is I've made a lot of bad choices. One of the biggest ones was bad grades in high school. Bad grades in high school led to eventually hitting like night school. And then that led to working really, really hard for like a decade, like a full-time job and then some during the day

and then night school at night and long commutes. And all that shaped me into a really hard worker, which had me achieve a lot of success through like my 30s and early 40s, which led to a really good place. And if I hadn't gotten bad grades in high school, I might've gone to a different school that led to a different wife and I really

like the wife I picked so a lot of my bad decisions led to turned out well turned out well and you know so it's like oh I'd have just studied in high school then I've been on easy street well who knows that easy street would have landed here where I'm happy to be

anyway no I think what you've described is why it's so fucking hard to answer that question, right? Because you can say, these are things I didn't like in my life at the time, but the repercussions of those are so variable and they're not based on your enjoyment of that fact, right? Like, okay, you went to night school.

You probably weren't thrilled about the fact you're going to night school. You're at night school because you got bad grades and whatever. That night school shaped you in some positive way and you don't fucking know so i don't i don't know man the the answer to that on some sense like i i said this early on the stream and uh early on this podcast and meant it like if my wife hadn't been this maybe it was in the last episode i don't fucking remember anymore now but if i hadn't my wife hadn't been so adamant about supporting me about streaming I would never have quit graduate school for streaming I wouldn't be

here right now as a youtuber and streamer I would have just finished graduate school is that a positive or negative I don't know time will tell I would have my yeah time will tell I would have my PhD in psychology I would be working in psychology I love psychology I love the the aspects of that but I don't know that I love it enough that I wish to do that for my life. I don't know. I like YouTubing. I like streaming. I enjoy the hell out of my life right now.

Is that a positive or negative? I don't actually know at this stage. So I don't know how to answer that in the sense like it's a great question. It's a good question. I should think about that. Someone paid $10 to ask this question. Oh, okay. So we don't have to give a shit about it this isn't your question this is this is somebody else's this is no this is your patreon subscribers i don't have to answer this

like hey i have a question um sometimes i think about myself in the caregiving caregiver position which i would describe as like a speech therapist and a physical therapist or a psychologist. And I'm not trained in any of these things. My temperament is such that I'm a sprinter. Like I'm awesome as a speech therapist, physical therapist, psychologist for a short period of time. But if I were to do it every day, all day, I'm a sprinter, dude. Like I I were to do it every day, all day, I'm a sprinter, dude. Like, I don't think I'd be good at it as a career. How do you, like, what do you think of that? How do you evaluate yourself if you were to be a

psychologist with like a private practice? Well, I mean, it's the most common misconception about psychology is that everybody's a clinical psychologist. What you're describing, a therapist is a clinical psychologist. I was never a clinical psychologist. I'm listening. I'm a social psychologist. My spiel, my spick is research. So for me, like when I was in graduate school, I researched human sexuality.

That was my emphasis was human sexuality that's the type of shit i'm interested in that's the type of shit i looked into i don't ever want to be a clinical psychologist i don't want to hear about your problems i don't give a fuck about your problems i'm not here to solve your problems dude that's the total opposite of why i get it got into psychology because i wanted to be someone who would listen to problems and try and solve it and for people listening that was your first major right yeah yeah taylor taylor started as a psychology major i don't know yeah no i finished as one with business as well sorry grad grad or undergrad undergrad okay undergrad psych and business um that's why i wanted to do it is

because i liked the clinical idea of kind of listening to someone's problems and then trying to help them out and see what you could do. Yeah, I kind of realized that as well about myself is that I don't have enough patience to be adequate for that job. Because really, if you're not a very patient person and you're just kind of doing a disservice to the people that you're trying to help because you're just going to be trying to rush them to a conclusion that they otherwise wouldn't have come to so that's kind of how i felt about it like i i really liked the idea of doing it and then when i learned more in like those upper level classes which i'm sure were still miles below what you were doing i kind of was like oh god damn like i really don't know if i if my personality is something that would be conducive to that environment like if i would be a good like nobody nobody wants to come to me and be like you know what i'm having a lot of problems let's go talk to taylor he won't make fun of me i was gonna say inserting snarky

comments is one of your core competencies. I was going to say that. It is. My core competency is – He is willing to add that to the conversation. Yeah. My core competency is being – it sounds arrogant, but I'm very clever. I'm clever with certain things, and I'm quick-witted, times that i think of jokes that in many situations not just the podcast that i know are wildly inappropriate to the situation but i rationalize it by going yeah but everybody's gonna think it's funny you know like and so you say that but that's not helpful to those people and so it's it's yeah all of a sudden you start mocking

some poor guy who's telling you about his mom walking in and seeing his micro penis and it almost blows his brains out that night like i thought it was a funny joke yeah i thought it was funny calling you you know mommy's dick or whatever it was like i wouldn't i wouldn't i couldn't do i don't in your early days taylor did you see yourself being a clinical psychologist was that your like original goal before you did you know the distinction? Yeah, I did know the distinction. I did my whole idea for getting into psych was like, alright, I can I really like helping people.

I do like that. Me too. It turned out that making fun of people wildly supersedes my desire to help people. and so I know that that is not I just I've not a good very long time that I don't give a fuck about helping people that's not my interest at all like I like teaching which is

interesting transitively helping people yeah but teaching teaching is different though because because I for me in my own way when i teach someone how to do something there's a few things that i'm really really good at and and i can i can sit someone down and be like look here's how it works don't don't read anything this is how it works and in that moment it's i think the reason i enjoy it is because of how it makes me feel more than you know some sort of uh could be could be that uh oh i love imparting knowledge upon the masses kind of thing it makes me feel more than some sort of altruistic, oh, I love imparting knowledge upon the masses kind of thing. It makes me feel good to teach others,

not just because I'm in this position of power where I'm showcasing my knowledge, but just the act of doing it, just the act of imparting that knowledge to them makes me feel good. My wife and I are, I've always said this about our relationship, and I really like this about our relationship, we we are not we are not the same person and if we are the same person i would probably despise her quite honestly like i like myself but i wouldn't want to be

dating me and you know it works out that she cares about people she's that element of our relationship i don't give a fuck about people in general i like teaching in some sense maybe maybe from what you've said it might be that it's based on like my enjoyment of uh that efficacy or something else i don't fucking know but like that is not my motivation in general for people it's not like hey i really care about this random person on the internet and i wish to make them better at life or better at civ or whatever it happens to be that is not my fucking motivation so uh yeah i hear you i hear you entirely on that it's it's been an interesting thing for that she's very it's complimentary in the sense that she feels that a lot more than me she cares about people much more greatly than i do in general so it's been interesting i'm more similar to her then because like like what i wanted was

to find some like someone like wings even like to find someone like that who's struggling with something and then like help them get through it sorry i don't know a lot about wings are you saying similar in the sense that wings wanted help or wings wanted to help he needed help no that wings needed help and he was someone like with his weight that like the fantasy if that's the correct way to say it was like helping someone like that and really getting them to succeed and then even that might almost be like embedded in arrogance because it's you want to show like yeah look at the success uh clinic for me look at how much i fixed this guy which i now realize i'm woefully inadequate in solving that because i'm not

like i'm a people person in that when i show up to a party people really like that i'm there because i'm fun but i'm not a people person in that someone's like you know what i want to i really have a lot of problems taylor is the guy to go to yeah i don't want to be that go-to guy i i make efforts to distance myself i like that that's what i'm saying i often find myself as that guy that taylor described like i have a problem. I need to get Woody's advice. One thing that's changed is my subscribers have aged, right? So back when they were saying, hey, I'm stuck in the friend zone. Like, I don't know what to do about this. Well, those problems are easy, right? Like you give it a go. If it doesn't work, you move on to someone else. Don't get, you know, to, you know,

don't, don't perseverate on just one girl. Now their problems are bigger. It's like career choices. It's things that aren't easily solved in three minutes. I don't know what Taylor's mouthing. That's a word I don't even know. I'm impressed. Perseverate?

I'm out as well. Perseverate is when you hyper-focus on something. Anyway, as well i was like perseverate perseverate is when you like uh hyper focus on something and um uh anyway so they put like uh hyper focus on this one girl and um now their problems are like hey you know i'm trying to choose a career for myself i'm trying to work this out i have problems that that aren't like super easy to solve and um that's scary man it's hard it's hard to help yeah yeah hard to help and scary as fuck because the repercussions get bigger as the problems get bigger the uh the repercussions for you making the decision for them to get bigger too i used to have this series called male monday right and male monday would be like 15 year old saying hey i'm having surgery on

my crooked spine this weekend. I'm scared, can you talk me through it? Like I said, friend zone or I have a toxic friend, right? I have a friend who when we're alone, who's really nice to me. And when we're in public, he's really mean to me. Like, how do you feel about that? And those other problems were super easy to solve.

Now, they're like, hey, bring back male Monday because I have a question about whether or not to get married. And it's like, oh, your problems have gotten harder, bro. Yeah, your problems are way more in-depth. My subscribers have aged. That's such an interesting point. Compared to you, Woody, I don't want to blow smoke up your ass, but I don't think I am. My channel is much smaller, so I have much less of these things than you do so but there's this no no i don't i'm again like i'm not trying to blow smoke any up anyone's ass i think this is

just how it is but at the same time like there is a degree of that right like it's the fact that people are subscribing to your channel not because they're like necessarily like your content or because they want to be more of that but they could they want your input on something and the bigger your channel the harder it is to get the input and also the the more of that you get the more diverse the fucking things you have to weigh in on it and shit i have no idea how you do that on some things like on some things it's like this is life life is complicated there is no actual answer for this there's no great answer for this how the fuck do you answer okay my you were talking about this earlier today like you're like there was a there was a person who said i had a friends with benefit i got her pregnant she doesn't want to get she doesn't want to get an abortion or that's a lot harder than do i that's

fucking impossible or my granary first yes it is right you can answer granary versus wait just wait real quick before we move on it's shrine right yeah yes okay i didn't even know the answer and i it's it i That's what I've been doing, and I want to make sure that's right. I will fix your early game sip. You just contact me, man. I mean, you should really be contacting Kyle as giving him tips on how to combat

my ferocious assault that comes in early. We start wars in 400 BC, and we don't make peace. We have eon-long battles. If you want help, you contact me. I'll help you with dealing with Taylor. Can I bring up a new topic?

Dude, the risky thing about me and Civ is I don't know enough that you can predict me. You have no idea what I'm going to do. That's how I play poker. Can I bring up a new topic? This is another $10 Patreon question, if you'd like to ask questions. Anyway. What's the coolest story behind something you own? Coolest story?

The coolest story. Okay. I bought a... This is in the past. But when I was 16, I was still... I'm 25. I'm still in the midst of this my Lord of the Rings obsession

that they made 500 replica witch king helmets the witch king was the lord of the Nazgul if you don't know who they are you know they had I could list some of the Nazgul right now but they had... I could list some of the

Nazgul right now, but they had this... the Witch King had this giant helm that you'll see in the movies when... The Witch King of Angmar. Yes. The Witch King of Angmar. And he had this giant helmet, and I bought it.

And it was something that... or I had it bought for me, rather. And when you put it it and it was something that i had bought for me rather and when you put it on it was heavy like it was fucking heavy it was something that only a mighty man could wear while he was fighting and i went to college didn't think about it i just thought when i go home my witch king of angmar uh helm will still be on its display case above my bed, because that's where it was. When I slept in my big bed, I had a queen-sized bed, and it had a big, like,

kind of armoire-style thing around it, and it had a big shelf behind the bed, and I had my Witch King of Angmar head right there. And I was like, alright, I don't need to bring that to college. I don't want to turn off the girls right away. I'll slowly introduce them to my Lord of the Rings obsession. I can just imagine you bringing the girl back to your dorm room

and you put it on and put it on. I think I should grab my pepper spray really discreetly right now. But that was basically it. I had that helmet. I went to college. I came back.

I didn't... If it happened before this, I didn't notice it,. I came back. If it happened before this, I didn't notice it, but I came back that winter break my freshman year. I went into my room and I looked up there. I didn't really think of anything of it. I wasn't looking for it. I slept a couple nights before I realized, man,

I had something over here. I had a Witch King helmet. Yeah, where the hell is my Witch King of Angmar helmet? I'm like the Witch King. And so I went and asked my younger brother and was like, where is my Witch King helmet, you dick? You know where it is, asshole. And he was like, oh, yeah, my friend was playing with that.

I don't know where it is. Maybe in your closet. And I was like, maybe in my closet. Okay. So I go back. I check my closet okay so i go back i checked my closet i find my witch king of angmar one of 500 this isn't one of those bullshit like oh we'll make a new one like and call it one of 500 every two months to trick idiots into buying it this was an actual one of

500 because there are very few people willing to pay 700 for a witch king helmet and so i got it i had it there i went into that closet and i was honestly like distraught when i saw it sitting there totally broken totally ruined all the spines that came out of it obviously it's some kind of plaster yeah they're the big ones on the head it's made of some kind of plaster but inside it's just a metal bar holding that up holding that little bit of plaster up and like the three inches between the tip and the bottom part of every single helmet spike was broken off. So it was just a metal bar going from the helmet ring up into, like, a weak little pinnacle at the top. And I was honestly so fucking upset by that that I don't think I talked to anyone in my family for a day or two.

Because I was like, how could you have let this happen? You know that I love Lord of the Rings and that this was my favorite Lord of the Rings possession. Fuck the Gimli axe and all that. This is my Lord of the Rings obsession. And they let it go by the wayside and they ruined it. And I, oh my God, even thinking about this pisses me off because I wish I still fucking had this.

This is something that could have lasted. It could have lasted. I could have given it to my grandkids and said, hey, if you want to be autistic in the future, wear this. Do you have it right now? Does it exist in your apartment? No, it's thrown away years ago because it was ruined to the point of no repair.

There was no way to fix it. It was completely ruined. Your story beats mine, I think. There were chin spines and they were totally broken and bent to the side like someone dropped it harshly not even dropped it like said fuck this and threw it down but i don't ever know what actually happened to it or who broke it but god damn that witch helmet was dope. So I've got this guy, of course, from what's that game? You know, he's from that game. What's that game?

You know, the one guns and the like. That's the bad guy right there. It starts with an F. Far Cry. That's the Far Cry guy. I had him made. The makeup artist who did the work on his...

Get him over here. The makeup artist who did all the work to his face was one of the Walking Dead makeup artists. They film here in Atlanta, so I was able to get him. And he did all this by hand. This is not how we bought this at all. This was a plain Jane store mannequin. And everything that...

All the skin tone, everything was painted on by hand. Like airbrushed on there to look exactly like the guy. I mean, his necklace and bandana and wardrobe and everything matches. And then... and then what is it there we go I got a few rare guns but there aren't any cool stories on them

but this other guy was a bad guy in what was that video game a different video game? A different video game. Let me grab Zorgon over here. Zorgon? Is that an actual video game? I'm afraid I'm gonna get sick. No? Oh, you are.

Oh, man. If you drink more wine, it will fix it. If you drink a little more... If you drink a little more wine, it will fix it. If you drink a little more... If you drink a little more wine, your body will go, we're fine. And then after the show, you'll go, ah, I need release.

That's crazy. I'm not even anywhere near that point. I'm just very burpy from this fucking champagne. So Zorgon here has... This is like a Tuesday night. So Zorgon here has... This is like a Tuesday night. So Zorgon here has a full skeleton. He's some sort of flesh-like foam in construction, and he looks just like the bad guys from the game.

I don't remember what game. I don't know. They had this guy strapped on the Staples Center during E3 about five years ago. He was literally strapped to the exterior of the Staples during e3 about five years ago like he was literally strapped to the exterior of the staples center and i talked to the makers of the game and i was like i want those i want three or four of those and they were like yeah we make that happen and they literally mailed this guy and three more of his compatriots to my house like all wrapped up um

apparently these cost like five grand to make because of the inner skeleton and the detail and the molding process. But Zorgon here has been with me ever since. I told them that I wanted him to dissect, to understand his inner workings. But in fact, I just wanted to keep him forever. So here he is. That definitely looks like a bad guy from Doom, right? It's not Doom.

No? No, I don't remember the game. I really don't. It looks really cool, though. I'm happy you have that upsetting mannequin. Can I go next? He's terrifying. I'm done.

He is. He is. Is everybody here? Everybody, let's have a drink. Let's have a drink. Everybody have a drink? Bottoms up. This is the bullshit uh

four month old wine yep next time uh next time uh chis wants to do a fucking drunk stream you guys let me know ahead of time just as a sip of water like fuck this that was wine this is oh it was yeah this is water but I'm really worried I saw Jackie come in there and kind of give you a look and you just were like, it's fine I'm just like, we are where we are we gotta make a living, bitch the first time he donated to me

I was doing it, oh are you gonna get drunk on the internet Jackie? I would often do 16 or 18 shots you're on about 5 shots Are you going to get drunk on the internet, Jackie? I would often do 16 or 18 shots. You're on about five shots. Yeah, I know. Yeah, right around there. I mean, I definitely don't want 18 shots worth of alcohol.

No one wants 18 shots. No one wants that. Oh, I thought you were saying that would be a good drinking episode. It was, but I don't think i'd ever want to do that again like in the sense that that was that was what the this this the stick was right like and we had some pretty pretty brutal nights like that it's a pretty brutal evenings like that but my wife has taken the alcohol away she just claimed all of it it's probably for the best. I really tried. I'm quite drunk. My face is numb. I don't know. My lips are numb.

What are we drinking? Whatever you're drinking, I want it next time. Because it's not reasonable. I have to take a breathalyzer test in a second. I think this will be my last one. One moment, please. All right. You know, this thing is bullshit.

It never gives me scores that I'm proud of. Go for it, Seth. You're fine. You can drive your kids. Yeah, it literally says I can go driving right now. If I were to drive right now, I would kill multiple people. I promise you. Well, instead of doing that. Don't drive too fast.

Instead of doing that, Kyle, tell me more. You should definitely use an Uber. Oh, tell me more. We've all taken jobs to earn extra cash back in the day. I guess this wants me to lie. Back in the day, I. Please talk about your own experiences earning extra money. Come on.

I've got a better way that you can earn extra money on the side. It's so much easier today thanks to Uber. Uber is the ultimate side hustle. Driving with Uber is a new way to earn extra cash whenever you want. And it's not just another job. It's a a new way to earn extra cash whenever you want and it's John it's not just another job it's a totally flexible way to earn you can turn it off and on just like your car if you're driving right now you should be earning right now start being your own boss today every day is a payday when you drive with you because you can cash out anytime with instant pay with access

to instant pay cash out your earnings up to five times a day with no minimum amount required. Listen, if you enjoy earning extra cash, if there's something special you'd like to buy, your car can start making you money. So go ahead, get your side hustle on, sign up to drive with Uber today. Go to uber.com slash drive now that's uber.com slash drive now and uh sign up today earn some extra cash driving for uber that's interesting they had us advertised for drivers not passengers yeah they got plenty of passengers yeah yeah they have a ton of have you guys ever used uber yeah i have yeah i don't you all have it was a good experience we just asked for an uber on our cell phone and then they showed up where we were and

they took us to where we wanted to go and they were way more polite than a taxi driver but yeah we got a uber uh we were at a luganita's brewery and the uh floor manager we were like we have to go pretty soon we need to get a cab and he's like i'll order your new bird like we didn't know that meant he was paying for it we got paid for by the fucking company to leave that and they ordered us an uber it's great we um it sounds lazy but we parked at the top of a really big high hill uh if you go to... Where's Machinima? What town is that in? Hollywood? Is Machinima in Hollywood? I think

it was Hollywood. Yeah, I want to say it's Hollywood. Whatever. If you go there, it's way more hilly than you might expect from a city. And we parked like 600 vertical feet up or something. Walked down to Machinima because it was really busy and crowded and stuff. And we were faced

with the decision to either walk back to the car which was something like mountain climbing and uh or or taking an uber and i was with x jaws he's like oh so we're an uber and they took us back up to our car and it was glorious it was way better than walking yeah yeah i got an uber from downtown st louis after i woke up at a friend's place after we were going out to bars the night before and got a ride to my place which is maybe 12 miles or something i don't know exactly it was eight dollars and 60 something cents and the guy dropped me off in his bmw x5 like the small suv kind and was super polite older uh white haired white guy and i was like hey can i can i tip you on the app and he was like no we only do cash tips and i was like well i don't have any cash so so so goodbye you know like uh that was great though uber my my uh one out of one experiences have been excellent yeah yeah i

usually get an uber or uh you know if if the situation allows you know that they've just got a driver which is usually a nice guy anyway um so i don't know i i i like uber a lot i like uber the business model i like that it enables lots of people to be self-employed i i like that um you know like it like it crowdsources employees i think that's kind of a cool thing and that's that's kind of what they're advertising on our show like hey you know if you've got a reliable car you can do a side hustle. You can just start working. And the way Uber works is it's like a supply and demand thing.

So if you work, like I'll make a thing up Tuesday afternoon, then it might not be great. But if you're willing to work on New Year's Eve when other people aren't, then you get a really high rate. Yeah, it's all surge pricing. So just like you said said if you use it at a time that nobody's asking you get it super cheap like that sunday morning that i used it if you use it i don't know saturday night it's going to be really expensive but they're still going to be probably cheaper and nicer to you than a taxi that's the time when if you're a driver you want to go like like so i knew someone who drove in in East Atlanta, and there's a lot of bars in East Atlanta.

And, I mean, it's just on any given night, like at night, there's just so much foot traffic. It's just tons and tons of people going to tons and tons of bars in a really condensed area. So that's when you want to work. You know, you want to be making those short, expensive trips from the bar to people's apartments and stuff like that on those drinking nights or on New Year's Eve or somewhere. Sometime like that when there's lots of people out drinking, lots of people needing those rides. No, I lied. I've used Uber twice. Oh, my God.

Maybe three or four times if I was blackout. The other two. But at least two that I remember. Where one was a morning after that me, just this two weekends ago, maybe. No, it was last weekend. Me and a few of my friends got hammered downtown and then stayed at his place downtown. And then the next morning, a few of us got up and we had to get in an Uber to drive back to all of our assorted cars around the city, which fucking sucks. And the guy was like, oh, we asked him like, oh,

you're up early, like do an Uber, you know, it's like 8am, you're already doing it. And he was like, yeah, I just haven't stopped since last night.

And that is not what you want to hear your driver say. I had the same thing. Bullshit. You don't want to hear. Bullshit, Taylor. I think like, that's exactly what you want to hear your driver say. You want your driver say i had the same thing all the shit you don't want to hear shit taylor i i think like that's exactly what you hear your driver saying you want your driver clearing with you exactly what he's doing the guy's like yeah man i get up every day at 8 a.m to drive you fucking dumbass drunks around at 6 a.m but he didn't get that guy's lying to you the guy says like he's like

i've been up since you know 2 a.m last morning ship shipping you fuckers around okay you at least you know what he's what he's coming from that's true i was also so dehydrated at that point that i just was like he just can we just go to a gas station and i can buy a water yeah right station let me buy some fucking water i'll pay four dollars i don't. It's a neat new world. So what I value, and we sort of covered this earlier, is owning my time. There's nothing I'd rather have than owning my time. And the traditional business model of employment involves people working from 9 to 5,

being kind of what I think of as cube cages and stuff. With companies like Uber, if you wanted to to you could just work when you want to you could work when it's best at peak hours you could work when you feel like it you could do whatever uh I think it's a neat like uber is not the only game in town like there's amazon deliveries I think that's either a thing or going to be a thing where they uh like, like take like the last mile of UPS and bring it to the next thing. I, uh, I don't know.

Uber in that world. I think it's a neat advancement in, in what's going on. Yeah, definitely. Uh, Oh, I'm so burpy from that goddamn champagne.

It sucks, man. It sucks. Oh, it'm so burpy from that goddamn champagne. That sucks, man. That sucks. Yeah. That sucks, but it's totally predictable. I wish that I had drank, like, a pitcher of beer instead. You know what? When we do this again, let's get a bunch of, like, Bud Light and drink that. No, because we'll be pissing constantly.

Yeah. This is a four-hour show. Pick something that's reasonable for four hours of drink like it's not hard all right well let's all have really so uh kyle's best effort was not the best choice no i i really liked uh kyle's best effort i really liked it uh kyle you want to have another shot of i i think i think i'm all good over here. Yeah, seriously. Let's all do... I had an extra shot when nobody was doing anything at all. I've had several of those.

Let's all give a blow, and whoever's the lowest has to drink another drink. Want to do that? If it's me, then I can't help you, because Jackie took all my alcohol away in an effort to be a nice person. Because Jackie took it all away. She did.

All right, I'm at three seconds. Quick update, I'm at one second. About to start. Next time, give me some heads up. I'll buy a fucking breathalyzer. They're kind of expensive. I know, 75 bucks. Yeah, 60.

Give me more than a day's heads up and I'll do it. I know. $75. Yeah. $60. Kyle, hold it up. Wow, Kyle's the lowest. I'm so glad it's not me. He's the lowest? I don't feel the lowest. Point 155 for this gent. So, Kyle, that's all you, buddy.

I'll drink with you. I love it. The highest and lowest drinking. Hey, I'll have some buddy. I'll drink with you. I love it the highest and lowest drinking. Hey, I'll have some water. I'll join too. Good deal, ladies. That was not fun. Oh, goodness gracious.

Next time you guys want to do a drinking stream, please reach out. Talk to people who've done it before. Seriously. I feel like you're degrading my drinking stream abilities. Like, you're putting me down. I'm clearly a master of the drinking stream. If you pass out on, like, drink number two,

and it's like, drink number two is 15% alcohol by volume, and you're drinking, like, that with five other people, I just, what are you, like, I don't want to shit on you, but I just want to say, if you want to reach out to someone who's done this before, please. Please do so. I don't want to shit on you, man.

See, it's hard to keep things going correctly because a couple of us don't like alcohol. It's a drinking episode where you drink alcohol and it doesn't come episode where you drink alcohol and it's yeah if you want to come out well if you if you choose for yourselves that you want to do a drinking episode you might have to deal with alcohol i don't want to i don't want to be the person who pushes on you i've watched multiple periods through both the previous hour and a half that we didn't get

in this current episode where both Kyle and Woody have sat back for a while and clearly been thinking, oh, I am drunk. When I went to pee, when I went to pee, I just went and peed outside. I just went and walked to the basement door and fucking pissed out the door.

I was standing there. I would lean really far back and they'd be like, whoa, back forward. I'm doing really far back and they're like whoa whoa back forward and then like I'm I'm I'm doing this back and forth out there but I just don't drink very much anymore so what I've had has me uh has been pretty tipsy over here but I think I think it's been pretty fun um it has tomorrow morning's not gonna be great it will bother me a bit like I won't even know like it'll be like any other morning. What the fuck are you talking about? Oh, my God.

That's so not true for me. I'm going to be so hurting. I'm laughing at the alcohol tolerance of you guys. Like, no offense. It's not like I'm not quoting you. I'm not being like, you are ship-tired for this. You're not chiding us. No, I'm not chiding you. shiptards for this you're not chiding us yeah no i'm not chiding you

i'm just amused at it but i can't imagine simultaneously being like i can't drink this because i'm too drunk but tomorrow i'll be fine that makes no fucking sense i never get a hang over the next day like there was a time when i drink a lot yeah never there was a time when i drink a lot um uh people like to buy me drinks so if I travel and go to an event or something, then it's hard not to get really shivvy. Woody's wandering around with his hands out. Look at Woody walking around with his hands like this. Like he's a trapeze-man.

I have drank gallons more liquor, I think, than Woody has. Woody's tolerance is on a completely another level than mine even. But I just don't drink anymore. I don't care for it. I don't care for it. I don't enjoy being drunk. So I find other ways to have a good time. But I don't know how much I've had to drink tonight. It's not a large amount.

But there was a time when I can remember drinking 13, 15 shots in an evening over the course of three or four hours and just handling that fairly well as long as I had a big meal, but I can also get out of hand and start vomiting and just ruin the night for myself, so I just stopped drinking a couple years ago. It's a razor's edge, yeah. It's a real razor's edge for me when you don't have that control.

I had a big meal tonight for lunch and dinner, specifically to prepare for this. I don't know what the fuck you guys would be doing. Yeah, I did... Everyone stop. Why do we all stop? I asked what you have to eat. Pasta for dinner

and fucking curry for lunch. What kind of curry? Microwave. Fucking Amy's curry. I like panang curry. There is a level of buzz that I can achieve and then not have a hangover the next day.

I have surpassed that level of buzz. What are you going to say? Kyle said something very similar. He was saying he'd be fine tomorrow. Fuck this guy. Make him drink some more alcohol. He should be fine tomorrow. I'm not going to be fine tomorrow. Fuck this guy. Make him drink some more alcohol. He should be fine tomorrow. I'm not going to be fine tomorrow.

I like how drunk Woody talks. Like every word is deliberate and purposeful. The problem is that like I don't know how much I have to drink for the next day to be bad. I've drank so much that I spent like three or four hours in the middle of the night vomiting you know like like literally slept in the bathroom but when i wake up the next day i'm good that's like i i just don't get like a hangover that's true when i get really upset with myself alcohol wise like my body just doesn't do that my my whole fucking chemistry for my my family is like on board stays on board i was in austin texas one night i was

in austin texas and i bought this hotel room uh me and my buddy split it uh i don't remember what how much it was but it was 700 bucks each or something like that 800 each or something we bought this whole like baron's suite in the the kildorf hotel in austin or something like that it's like the whole first floor or something like that. It's this massive room. There's a dining table that you could seat a Game of Thrones audience at and three or four bedrooms and each bathroom was decked out with a shower

with digital controls and a sauna and a tub and all that stuff. I didn't get to enjoy any of that shit because I spent the entire night vomiting. I slept in that nice bathroom instead of my giant poster like four poster bed with 15 foot tall cathedral ceilings i slept in that goddamn bathroom with one like imagine this the toilet's in front of me i got a leg on the right

side a leg on the left side sitting on the floor and i recline back with a pillow on my head, you know, against the shower window, like walls, and every time I have to vomit, I just do a sit-up. I just do a sit-up, vomit, and then back into sleeping position. And that's how the night went. Right now, as you're telling the story, I am super grateful for my tile floors, because I'm 80% sure that they're going to be cooling me off as I vomit in the toilet tonight.

Just go to sleep. You think you're going to vomit? Oh, y'all wanted to do this tonight, right? No, I didn't want this at all. No, who pushed you into this? Chiz? These two people on the screen. These guys, they make me do it. The subscribers and stuff.

And I'm so glad my tile is cool. the subscribers and stuff and and and i'm so glad my tile is cool what are you talking about how cool those titles are gonna be as he lays around vomiting oh that that's what you're looking forward to right now i can't wait to get this poison out of me. Oh. I don't like it. I don't like it. It's on the inside. I'm not going to vomit, though. I'm perfectly fine.

After we wrap up here, I'm going to go upstairs and get a soda and some jalapeno cheese bread or something. Jalapeno cheese bread? I would not eat that. I took an antacid before all of this like one of those like zantac 125s or something like a really powerful yeah prilosec something like that because i knew that like what we're drinking is so acidic and like nasty that it can sour my stomach

and compound about 600 tums on call i have AMA question you guys ready for this someone paid 10 yeah stay in that while you read it it's so far I'm just gonna go to bed clearly I feel like I need my glasses normally all right any make career question hey guys I just turned 20 and I was wondering if my career path is a waste of time I studied graphic design and I want wondering if my career path is a waste of time. I studied graphic design and I want to work in a marketing slash social media type of job. At my current job, I have a side project of making YouTube video tutorials for our products and I want to do stuff like that and branding, but my younger brother is going into computer science. I know that STEM fields

make a lot of money. Do you think that graphic design and marketing is a viable choice or something that will be replaced easily by automation and foreign workers? You don't automate that. They won't be able to ever replace marketing with a robot because marketing has to do with consumer behavior because it used to just be demographics. It used to just be, ah, we need to reach out to the blacks between ages of 20 and 42. That's how it used to just be demographics. It used to just be, ah, we need to reach out to the blacks

between ages of 20 and 42. Like, that's how it used to be. The blacks is racist. I'm just saying what they would say back then. I was actually giving credit to people back then that they wouldn't say something else. But what I'm saying is that with marketing, it's behavioral now,

not demographic-based. And so I'm sure there's some deep analytics you can do that would determine behavior and whatnot, but probably nothing as reliable as having a human in charge. And that's how it's going to be, because demographic marketing doesn't work half as well as

behavioral marketing now that the internet is around. It's about the creativity involved as well, right? Because even if you had some sort of software, some program, some AI who could determine what people were looking for or what the best ad campaign would be for a certain thing, you still need that creative human being to put it into action, to design it, to make it look the way it looks, to make it work. So it sounds like the career you're in is one that isn't easily replaced, isn't easily automated. So it seems to me from the

outside looking in, I don't know where you're working or who you're working with. I don't know if you're making tutorials that are getting 10 views or if you're working for a major corporation and every time you make one of these tutorials, not only is it getting 10,000 views on YouTube, but it's going out on a DVD with every product that's released and you're getting hundreds of thousands of views. Everybody's learning from you how to use their product from you. I don't know if that's the

case or if you're working for some small bullshit product and 10 views per video and you're making minimum wage. I don't know. But if you're somewhere in between, that sounds like a good idea. Whereas STEM fields are pretty heavy on the educational side. So if you're not prepared for that, it sounds like you're ripping and ready to go with this advertising thing that you've already got. structure, all the work, time, effort, the foundation that's required for a STEM career. Sounds

to me like advertising is the way to go for you. If you wanted to go STEM, you probably should have started when your brother did. Yeah, if you want to go STEM to an actually immediately paying off career, that's what you should do. If I could give anyone advice in college,

get out of that English lit major. Get out of that English lit major. Get out of that underwater basket weaving. Get into engineering. Get into accounting. Do not go into law because so many people go into law and the law field is super saturated right now. Meaning that a lot of people spend a huge amount of money getting a law degree, and then they end up performing the duties of a paralegal for years, because there's just not

enough work to go around in that field. But yeah, I would say if you're into advertising, if you like marketing, if you like those fields, stick with it. And a lot of it just has to do with self motivation. Like, what are you into? If you enjoy that, stick with it. a lot of it just has to do with self-motivation like what are you into if you enjoy that stick with it if not find something else i'll weigh in and i'm a little drunk so i hope you get getting your patreon value but uh it seems like there's this spectrum of like how much a job sucks and how much it's worth like You can earn a decent amount of money doing roofing, but that job really sucks.

We all kind of understand that hammering nails into roofing shingles is a sucky job. You have to lift heavy things and you have to work in the heat. And then, for whatever reason, graphic design doesn't pay well. It doesn't. It's a saturated market

there's a lot of people offering that service yeah have you have you guys uh bought like an emote recently on uh youtube or something like that i don't feel like that's a saturated market at all i feel like right now graphic design makes a shit ton of money professionally it is maybe if you're getting stuff on youtube then no but as far as professionalism like usually per city there's a couple of firms that you trust to do it and that's just who they go with and so unless you're hired by one of those firms you're kind of shit out of luck because independently nobody's going to be like hey i'm going to go with tim watson's uh graphic design as opposed to you know uh colby digital or whatever the fuck the name is.

Yeah, I'm with Taylor. I feel like it's generally accepted that knowing Photoshop and having an eye for design isn't a highly paid skill. You know, it sucks. I wish it was, but it's not. But you might really love it. And you would be on that end of the spectrum where you love what you do but you're not highly rewarded for it and most computer guys I feel like at least over time stop loving what they do or don't love what they do but they're highly rewarded for it

and you have to ask yourself where you want to be on that spectrum you know do you want to hammer roofing nails do you want to write code or do you want to be on that spectrum. Do you want to hammer roofing nails? Do you want to write code? Or do you want to do graphic design? Maybe something you have a passion for, but you're not highly rewarded for it. If you want to make a lot of money, it helps to be self-employed. Like that's the key.

If you're not self-employed, you're typically making someone else's dream come true. And I don't know, some level of self-employment. It doesn't have to necessarily be self-employment. It could be being a salesman and working on a commission. It could be, like I said, legit straight-up self-employment. But some level of being rewarded as a percentage for your own efforts works out typically really well for compensation compared to a salary job. So I don't know.

We started on this with, you know, should I keep going in this graphic design? Yeah. If it's your passion, I guess do that, but find a way that, that you can be the guy that gets the bulk of the spoils.

Also differentiate yourself, make it so that you're not just the guy that comes up with a good picture because usually what people in graphic designer end up doing is a consumer products company or someone will approach them and say hey we're releasing this lip balm next august we need a good redesign for it and we need to include all of these selling points because basically you can't just make a package look pretty and expect it to sell you have to do what the market demands and do something that will titillate the market you're going for and so don't just become good at that become good at being constructive in the marketing process to where if someone says hey i want to make this

lip balm this birch bees or whatever you don't just say okay yeah tell me what to do and i'll do it you say okay tell me what to do and i will do it but you also come up with your own thing and you show something that's a little bit different than what they showed because that's how marketing departments work you'll send something back and they may go oh wow we didn't anticipate this word looking so good in this position or these this phrasing happening so well on this on the label and we really like that and so really differentiate yourself show that you're not just someone who can make a design but also someone who can contribute in a way to the marketing process but at the same time don't be one of those artists who's like i just i need seven bees on the bert's beeswax uh label that i made and i just won't move if you

guys decide against it like you have to be malleable as well because generally if someone from marketing at the company you're making a design for tells you hey this isn't what we need this is these aren't the words we need highlighted. They're telling you the truth, and they know more than you. So know when to back off and know when to accelerate your own creativity because there are a lot of products out there that you will be doing graphic design for because a lot of graphic designers do work in consumer products.

Work on that. Get good at coming up with creative ideas but also know when to back off and just to do exactly when what rather the the the marketing department of that said company tells you to do maybe that doesn't make sense because i'm drunk no but it does maybe it's funny i'm sitting here admiring your like legit real world experience in marketing like i forgot i do know a lot about that industry. I work in it intensely. I've been on the customer side of it where like,

I'll say, Hey, look, I want this. And they'll be like, okay, tell me exactly what you want. You know,

lay it out all out from beginning to end. And I say, you know what, bro, I suck at this. That's why I hired you. You know, like if,

if I could lay this all out then like okay we did this at woody craft right so at woody craft we had uh these ranks you could buy but woody craft was unique in that we had a lot of games and when you bought a rank you got a lot of stuff so much fucking stuff that we had a hard time telling it to you right you know like how would you deal with it if you said all right when you buy a rent you know when you buy i'm making up a thing like immortal at woody craft you get 730 things how do i tell you what things you get and um so you know we go to a designer and we say, look, here's the problem we have. You get so much fucking stuff at this rank, at this level that we don't even know how

to explain it all to people. And then he came up with this idea. There were tabs, it was a GUI, you know, included all the previous levels, et cetera. And he did it well. But when we hired less experienced, I'll consider less professional people, they were like, oh, just tell me what you want it to look like, and then I'll make it look like that. And I'm like, I don't really know. They don't have the creativity. And neither did I.

That's where, so I think you and I are still in this regard. There's a lot of things that come up, and it's like, ah, I need this. And there are people who do this but can i figure this out right now in the next couple hours and just do it myself without hiring that guy and we can many many times we can watch a few youtube youtube tutorials and we can learn photoshop we can watch a few youtube tutorials and we can learn a lens technique or something like that and then we can do it but when when it's creativity, when we need the guy

who knows which drapes go with that paint, I can't learn that. I need to rely on your expertise. And that's what you're really paying for. More than just his technical proficiency, you're paying for the creativity part of his brain. That's what I don't have

in many regards. I can think of something cool to do but i couldn't figure out how to put that gooey together and how to display that information in a clean-cut fashion to what kyle's saying even just as important as what he's saying sometimes you will be conscripted onto a job that says we need your creativity here other times you will be brought onto a job at least in consumer products because that's my expertise that a company will say hey we want this is our burt's bees lip balm and we want you to mention that it's three times as moisturizing as whatever the fuck we want you to mention that

this is a thing we want to mention that this is a feature we want to mention that this and then you take that and you make it into a formulative kind of architecture and you send them back that graphic and whatnot so it's really as tautological as it is you have to know when the customer wants what kyle says which is we want your creativity we want that added we want that value and you also have to know when you are out of your element and you are promoting a product say that the marketing of that company knows way more about than you and you just need to back the fuck off and do what they say because most of the time graphic designers think that pretty products sell and they don't because people have this problem with marketing where like if a thing with companies is if i walk into an accounting department i never go hey you know what you should do you should do accounting this way like you don't do

that if with marketing everybody thinks that it's just intuitive. Like, hey, everybody likes this. You encounter that in a psychology PhD. Everyone thinks they're a fucking psychologist. Everyone thinks they understand that because that's something. I'm sorry to interrupt, but that's true on YouTube too. There are a million people telling me that because they watch YouTube videos, they know what I should do with my YouTube channel. They don't know shit, but youtube videos they know what i should do with my youtube channel yeah and um they don't know but they think they know yeah they say hey look like

what do you should go back to cod like that's something i hear a lot and they might be right but it's also true that cod is a game that's really cool just come and gone right it's peak sales worth years ago and uh and the things that i didn't cod like mail monday advice like that has passed um whatever you know people think they're experts in things because they're consumers and consumers aren't necessarily experts even though they know what they want personally they're not experts they don't know what they want for everyone exactly right like consumers everyone's an expert in marketing and the first rule of marketing is don't use yourself. Don't use yourself as an example ever.

Always use statistics, data, see what people actually do. Because it's very easy to say, oh, I really like Burt's Bees. You know, if it were a green tube instead of a tan one, oh, man, people would love that. Like you can't go off that kind of stuff you have to go on what the data shows and that's how marketing has changed is that it's no longer based on the the don draper marketing of oh just say that the lucky strike tobacco is toasted like that was honestly back when advertising was like fuck it let's see what we can do there's no internet and analytical collection.

Let's just see what fucking works. Now it's so much of a science that you really can't go off of what any individual person says. And so even if that person is, going back to the question, the designer, you have to be able to differentiate what you want to do as what you see the product as in the endgame, or at least the product design compared to what the marketing team of that individual company wants which is what's ultimately important because that's your client and those are the people who know exactly what will actually sell the product a lot of people are typing and now i'm the only one talking and i think i feel like i

need to keep talking because otherwise everyone's just typing and that's not for a good radio show so regardless i think i'm on the edge of like sickness really yeah there was a point maybe just 15 minutes ago where i was like do i need to run to the toilet do i need to run no i think you can stick this out. Let's see where we're all at. I swear I don't I feel like I don't know if I'm saying it's inaccurate. I'm going to lose. Kyle's not giving me credit.

I don't even have one of those things so I think I win by default. Or lose. I guess it could be lose. Yeah, I would say you'll lose damn it Taylor kicked my ass what's Kyle getting I got Kyle though yeah only.049 according to this

I don't know how to explain this .049 Kyle I am so I don't know how to explain this. Is it 0.049, Cap? I am so far past. You could go lift someone up. I don't believe that. It says I could drive, but you are not safe in my car. I assure you.

I promise you. This is a terrible idea. It even says it on the box. Do not use this to determine whether or not you should drive. That's good advice. Because Why? What is the point if it doesn't do what it's supposed to do?

The point is that you can do shitty drinking episodes like this. Yeah, they thought that it was going to prove that we got drunk. If you're questioning my drunkness you don't know drunkness. I'm not questioning a drunk person. I just wonder.

Woody is absolutely drunk right now, and I would not sit behind the wheel of the car. No, but I'm safe to drive for some reason. Here's a thing I just figured out. I feel like you know how they say... I'm not about about new money

versus old money right now this would be the opportunity i would so lose you know how they say that like if people sometimes say that if a officer gives you a field sobriety test one of these blow things you should deny it and opt for the blood test and i feel like what i'm experiencing right now it's more accurate i'm told i'm not an expert but um i feel like what i'm getting right now is that it really is inaccurate this is bullshit i have had random numbers all night long yeah i think that their uh breathalyzer is much better. It's bigger. It's a $76 breathalyzer. Yeah, I guarantee that's a $65 breathalyzer. The police breathalyzer is probably like at least a few hundred bucks.

I mean, we went above and beyond the call of duty as far as breathalyzers are concerned because people may think these are cheap. I thought this was $80. This is like $70. because people may think these are cheap. I thought this was $80. This is like $70. There are breathalyzers out there that are like $20 that you can put on your keychain that are bullshit.

So we actually went above and beyond by getting these nice ones. Did you see Jim Norton give Nancy Grace shit? Did you see Jim Norton giving Nancy Grace shit on his show? I did. That was hilarious. Nancy Grace, the Fox News person? Nancy Grace comes on Jim Norton. HLM. giving nancy grace shit on his show i did that was hilarious that was hilarious fox news person nancy grace comes on jim norton yeah yeah she comes on jim norton and another guy's uh like podcast radio show it looked like a radio show they were in a very professional studio um and uh

and they just they just immediately oh cool oh they got a serious show i'll start listening jim norton and sam roberts show on uh on serious x. I'll start listening. It's the Jim Norton and Sam Roberts show on SiriusXM. I'll find that channel tomorrow and tune in. But his first question is like, how do you feel that you're – I always space out. He just went after it immediately. He's like, you know, these stories – I watched it too. I'll fill in for you.

Go ahead. He was saying basically Sam and Jim were sitting there with Nancy Grace. She had just walked in, and their first question was something leading in to the fact that she kind of exploits kidnapped kids and murder victims and gets hashtags trending like kid dead in dryer and things like that. Because a story will be like a mother used her dryer to kill a young child. Because that's how Nancy Grace talks. Very bad cadence. And that's basically what it was. And it was them asking brutal questions. Like so you had a Twitter hashtag going called baby dies in dishwasher.

So you had a Twitter hashtag going called Baby Dies in Dishwasher. Do you think that may trivialize the actual struggle felt by the individuals in that case? And she goes, no, I don't think that does anything to lessen the effect of what we're doing out there. Victim advocacy. The victim advocacy that we do is very good for everyone. Advocacy. The victim advocacy that we do is very good for everyone. It was just them tearing into Nancy Grace for taking advantage of shitty situations to push her own agenda. And she could not defend it. It was hilarious.

She walked off the show. He left the show. Eight minutes in or something. Fifteen minutes in. It was very soon in. She's just like, well, I'm going to be leaving. And she's like, you got all your shots in. And they're like, well, these weren't shots.

We're just curious how you defend these positions, these things you've done. Woody's vomiting, by the way, for the radio audience. That looks like a vomit stumble. Yeah, for the radio audience out there, Woody's vomiting up some of Kyle's best Apple Moonshine right now. And it's a goddamn waste if you ask me. And judging from the – I haven't tried it. I wasn't given any of this. But judging from... Yeah.

No, I got that. I wouldn't touch it if I had the option. But judging from all of you all involved in that, he's not enjoying that upchuck. That upchuck is going to be very sugary, very fucking intense. He's not getting away from it by throwing that shit up. No. No. That will only

reintroduce. He may already have diabetes because of drinking Kyle's best. Wilford Brimley has a word for that. Four cups of sugar in like a gallon and a quarter of volume there. That's an enormous amount of sugar. That means there's like

a half cup of sugar in here. I don't know what the volume is. Like a half cup of sugar in here. I don't know what the volume is. Like a quarter cup of sugar in here. There's a lot of fucking sugar in there. It's thick. It's syrupy. But for those who don't know, Woody's thing is he only will drink a drink that is super sweet. I would have done a drinking episode with Miller Lite.

I can polish off a six-pack and be good and buzzed and the normal amount of fat afterwards, but I know you don't have any respect for the Miller Lite at all. Your alcohol looks incredible because this has been a travesty. I'm shocked

you drank that whole bottle of champagne. That's outrageous. I also drank the third bottle of wine that was that's outrageous i also drank uh i liked what i had to drink the third of bottle of wine that was in there for like four months which is yeah i was happy i i just didn't understand like this was your show your you guys's show you guys wanted to have it you guys wanted a drinking episode but you weren't prepared for drinking i don't understand i thought that this would be enough to get me pretty wasted i did it's like that's three shots that's three glasses of wine.

I know, but I didn't know. For me and Woody. All right. So to be fair, I will say this. It's a small amount of alcohol for a drinker. But Woody and I just don't drink. The last time I had a drink of alcohol and meant to. I had a beer last year with my dad.

It was hot. Last year? Yeah, last year I had a beer. Yeah, last summer I had a beer, one beer with my father. That's the last time I drank. Holy fuck, that's so long ago? That's what I'm saying. I don't drink alcohol. I don't care for it. I don't like

getting drunk. No, it's really cool. Not my thing. And then I got the genetic predisposition toward all kinds of bad things happening. So you're doubly against it. It makes sense. No reason to risk it. And I got no problem with it.

I got no problem. Wings would always do this thing where he claimed his dad was an alcoholic. And so he would fake drinking on our show with this sugar water or something. I don't think I'm going to become an alcoholic tomorrow. I'm not going to the store tomorrow to buy a case of beer or anything.

Like, Jesus Christ. And if you did... But i did know that it wasn't going to take so what i did the other day is i took one of these and i sipped like that much of it i'm trying to show accurately the camera i think like that much and immediately had a buzz immediately had a buzz like after two like gulps of this crap so i guess you want this to be clear because you want to see what it would do to you yeah yeah yeah okay it was good yeah and so basically there kyle's lack of tolerance made me think that my time like i don't i drink a couple nights a week that it would get me drunk and i was mistaken but it like which is crazy because I don't drink every night or anything. I thought that's what it took to get a super high

tolerance, but I guess just regularly drinking socially or whatnot gives you enough of a tolerance to really outdo people who don't drink at all. I know I used to be able to drink a lot more than that. We would always go to this Mexican restaurant and I would get this gigantic mug of frozen beer.

Oh, wow. I guess I would drink a half a gallon Dos Equis a night every night. But, man, I don't feel so great. I don't feel sick, though. I'm not going to vomit. That's not going to happen. I don't either. I almost wish I would because this is so many calories.

So many calories. It's so many wasted calories this is so many calories. So many calories. This is so many calories. And so many wasted ones. Like the wine I drank when I was like four months old, that was fucking horrible. And it still was not half as bad as this Chandon. This is poison. This is a four-point. How you doing, Woody?

Look at it. Look at Woody. Look at Woody. I didn't know that was a thing. I thought that would be good. You okay, Woody? What's that? How you doing over there?

Oh, my God. Did you get the evil out of you? No. I went to the bathroom, Oh my god. Did you get the evil out of you? No. I went to the bathroom and I knelt down by the toilet and I thought I'd throw up but I didn't. So I just started cleaning the toilet.

I grabbed toilet paper and I was like, oh, there's some pubes here. And then my OCD took over and I got the spigot span and my thought process was I'm going to appreciate that I clean this toilet later tonight. And then my OCD took over and I got the spigot span. My thought process was like, I'm going to appreciate that I clean this toilet later tonight.

And now it is glorious. You're just going to ruin the cleanliness of that toilet later tonight. That's the idea. When I vomit tonight, I will not be thinking how gross an environment I'm in. Do you really think you're going to

vomit tonight? Really? I'm not 100% sure. I think so. I think you can keep it down. I think you can muscle it down. I mean, I know Kyle doesn't, but I also have no feelings of vomiting. I have shifted from the glorious drunk to the

ah, fuck. That was probably a couple too many I did that eating competition at that paintball thing and I don't know how many hamburgers I ate it was like four quarter pounders or something they were cut in half and I ate like eight and a half of those so that's like four and a quarter

quarter pounders or something that's like a pound of hamburger meat plus the buns and shit I was like this is bullshit this is not my meal for tonight i'm gonna go vomit this up and then we're gonna get some good food and i did and that's kind of how i feel about like at least 1000 calories of like gross shit we just drank i'm pouring all this pouring all of it out no dude save it like it's a cool thing to have yeah i would like more. Send it to me.

Melissa wants some. Well, I will hook her right. Melissa loved it. She was like, oh my god, this is the best thing ever. I love it. Yeah, she'll drink quite a bit of that. She really likes it, but you shouldn't pour it out, dude. You did a good job.

Your first time trying to make moonshine. I think you did a great job. I think you and his friends kind of failed, though. Because the first trying to make moonshine. I think you did a great job. I think you and his friends kind of failed, though. Because first time someone makes moonshine, you should be like, yeah, that's great. I'll try a sip, but I'm not committing to drinking lots of this. Because that's a really fucking bad idea.

Filthy, I have to ask you. Like, I'm using the back of my chair as kind of a head stabilizer. Sure, sure, sure. It makes the world rotate less less is that what you were doing too i'm not spinning i don't get spins very often like i my my genetic layout is my family uh my my genetic family anyway when shit gets on board it's really hard to get rid of it i don't throw up i don't get sick i don't spin like. I just process the fuck out of it.

I lean forward 100% of the time for every show. I'm good. Good. I get the spins. I get nauseous. I don't. I get vomitsis. I will start throwing up and won't throw up all night. I get a sour stomach, so the vomit is hyper-acidic.

So acidic that you can just like like you're like spitting the sour acidicness of it out of your mouth. Once it's on board I can't get fucking rid of it. So if I'm going to drink the fucking shit. I get everything bad that Kyle mentioned and then throw in a hangover. I can't see me

possibly becoming an alcoholic because I get all the negative times ten like there's like rugs i can name off the top of my head that are better than alcohol what the fuck are you if you like if you really think about it the amount of drinking that it takes to be like a real like hardcore alcoholic is like you're waking up in the morning and you're taking like a slug of vodka. No, we aren't. And then probably more. Like, imagine the amount of... I must defend

those of us who wake up in the morning and don't take a slug of vodka but nevertheless may identify as alcoholics. No, I wasn't... Okay, maybe that's how you identify. I wasn't saying that's how all of them are. I'm just saying that the picture of an alcoholic in my head

is someone who wakes up in the morning and takes a big glug of vodka and goes and makes some food maybe and then just drinks more. It's like, think of the amount of calories you're consuming and then also how not full you feel ever. Like, that seems really awful. not full you feel ever like that seems really awful i don't know if that's how it is but i'm sure it's it's something like that so we should probably wrap the show soon huh i think we probably should because kyle's eyes are giving me uh what he is horizontal what he is horizontal for the first time in pka, I can see both of his knees.

We got Woody's thighs on camera, and past that, I don't know what we want to do today. I don't either. I might just hop off here, put something on TV, and then until I sober up and go to bed, just play Civ. Oh, that's what's happening. Yeah, I'm gonna go play.

Oh my god, you're doing shit after this? Do you want to play some Civ after this, Kyle? what's happening. Yeah, I'm gonna go play. I'm gonna finish up my game. Oh my god, you're doing shit after this? Do you want to play some Civ after this, Kyle? Oh, absolutely. I will destroy you. Wait, Woody, you're not gonna do something after this? I'm gonna render this video reluctantly. I don't know how to explain how I, like, I wish

I could get out of this. I wish there was some way to not do this tonight but but but epicac patreon.com slash pka people that paid for me to do this shit after every show that that expect early access so um so that's what I'll be doing well once again how about this once again credit where credit is due to woody for drinking hard this episode i am very proud of you i didn't think you would drink this much i'm very i told him you would i'm sure my mom is equally impressed private conversation today about this and i'm like looking for it right now like like what i

said i was like woody is not known for half-assing things woody will that is exactly what you said you said woody does not half-ass things and i was like i don't know like he doesn't like to drink or something along those lines and you totally proved me wrong dude all day long this was on my mind i was like i know it's coming tonight this is not what I choose for myself. But this is the thing that I'm doing for our subscribers. Honestly, I got Qdoba before this because I wanted to have a burrito. I wanted to treat myself before this disaster. And as I was walking in my car with my burrito in the big plastic bag,

I caught myself saying, I don't want to go fucking drink right now. A bunch of fucking apple juice. God damn it. I love those videos. Go home and play video games and go to bed. Alright, so let me read my outro. Please do. Let's let Filthy,

I almost called you Lefty again because I'm a little drunk here. Oh, for fuck's sake. I thought I was doing well. I thought I was doing well. I thought I was doing well this summer. Lost a little weight. Worked out a lot. I don't want to be called lefty every fucking time you get fucking confused over here. I'm not liking it.

Just doing the best I can. So you guys want to get your side hustle on? Well, you're going to want to sign up with Uber and earn some extra cash whenever you want. It's totally flexible. You're your own boss like what's that and you can uh you can cash out up to five times per day there's no minimum amount so you could you know you get somebody a ride cash that money out buy yourself some lunch and just continue about your day that's pretty cool uh sign up today at uber.com slash drive now that's uber.com slash drive now filthy tell them all where they can find your

wonderful content it's a very easy thing to find me youtube uh filthy robot google uh google that you'll fucking find me a million times over look for uh filthy robot uh c for fucking uh youtube stuff and filthy robot again You'll find me again. Lots of Civ 6 content. Lots of Civ 5 content. If you're interested in gaming, you should look me up. We'll fix that stuff. I'm gonna make Taylor a much

better Civ player. I have a feeling this is gonna happen. He's gonna beat Kyle 9 out of 10 times until the 10th time I talk to Kyle and then it'll be 100% for Kyle. I am your canvas. Paint on me. Check him out. He's the best civilizations

player on planet Earth. And any other planet as far as we know. Yeah, check him out. And use Woody's promotion there. Check him out. He's honestly the worst. If I weren't on the podcast, I'd kill myself right now. Oh, by the way,

G Fuel's running a coupon code Woody. It's 40% off. And it's very rare that they do that. Alright, coupon code Woody for G Fuel and check out Filthy Robot. Thank you for listening. Yeah, cheers guys. Good night everybody.

Good night.