Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #328

Episode Date: April 7, 2017

This week on PKA, Harley from Epic Meal Time is back! To tell stories about his time in Italy, then the guys watch a man get swallowed whole by a python and a woman fall 7 stories out of a window. Just another typical episode of PKA!

We just went live. So that's how we started with the request not to go live yet. PKA episode 328 with our guest Harley. Kyle? Several sponsors tonight, of course. Smart Mouth returning again, as well as Squarespace, Blue Apron, Lyft, and Texture. We'll talk about those more as we get on into the show. We've got our special guest Harley coming back. Always love having you on. And just before the show started, I was like, what do we want to talk about first? I was like, politics is a little slow right now. I've got this one story of the man being eaten by the python.

You literally, your whole idea of like, all right, what should we start with? And usually we at least get a couple ideas in before someone goes, okay, that's good. We can go with that. Kyle got halfway through suggesting seeing a guy eaten and cut out of a python. And I was like, that's it. That's what I'm saying. We were all on the same team. I'd be lucky if we're not talking about this in two hours. And that was literally one minute right before the link came through.

Like literally one minute before you went live. And so I got the link. I click it open. I'm like, oh, here we go. I skipped right to the middle. Man being eaten by a snake. Always lead with an animal eating a person. Right?

That's always what you lead with. Every time. It's always good. Because, well, it depends. If it's just some little girl and she gets snipped by something, it's like, oh, that's not funny. It's still funny. But it's not uproariously funny. Because she didn't really deserve it.

But when it's someone, like, poking at a reptile or really any animal, I like seeing them. An antagonizer. That guy who's messing with the bear and it grabs his blue jean jacket and sucks him in through the cage and he almost loses his life. Something like one in eight or one in nine Vietnamese adult males have lost a limb

from fucking with alligators. You've seen all those videos. Pre-internet, when animals attack was really awesome. usually all those videos pre-internet uh when animals attack was really awesome that was like really awesome pre-internet content i tried to like you know i've got that nostalgia in me of when animals attack and maybe our like i don't know 15 to 20 year old viewers don't know about this but it used to be a thing on tv it was like oh when animals attack is coming on and they had this montage of clips they collected there was no youtube or the internet now we have youtube and the internet so like maybe a month ago i went

online i was like let's see if you know what a modern day when animals attack i got a minute in and the gore was so heavy i was like ah yeah animals attack this is when animals fucking win i saw that guy lose to a to a deer though and i was like man like i still think i can take a deer everyone says what do you don't understand it's a wild animal fuck that i'm a meat eater it's a vegan if you can't kick a vegan's ass something's wrong with you have you ever hit like a butcher have you ever had like a butcher goat or get out of here with your logic i thought someone was gonna say nick diaz i'm actually i'm curious because like i kind of like i kind of side with woody but i see I thought someone was going to say Nick Diaz.

I'm curious because I kind of side with Woody, but I see where Kyle is going. I've never felt or struck a cow in the neck. But I'm curious, if Woody's going up against a deer, is this deer's neck so strong that he can't damage it if he got a clean neck punch? It's like a linebacker's thigh. It is so hard and muscular. What I was asking is, have you ever hit a butchered animal? Because I've hit Rocky Balboa style. I've hit sides of beef.

I've hit butchered goats. I've hit butchered pigs. Over the years, I've had access to these things because we're burning them or blowing them up or whatever. And it's like, shit, I'm going to punch that dead pig before we burn it, right? As you do. And you – I'm like, oh, oh, God. Oh, God. You never do that.

I was like, maybe an elbow. And I like fucking drop an elbow on the pig. It's like, ah, ah, my elbow. It's like he's dead and he's kicking my ass. The trick is not to hit the frozen ones. Hit them when they're unfrozen. He was not frozen. I just made an assumption for fun. To the point that you made, it's like hitting a linebacker's thigh.

If that is the case, you've got to think like the linebacker's thigh, where the thighs meet is the weak point. So maybe there is a weak point to the deer. Is where the thighs meet the penis? Do the thighs meet at the testicles? Is that what you're saying? That's what I'm saying Just try to kick the deer in the ball Does it do you have an Adam's apple? Like you know they like get on their hind legs and like clap clap clap clap clap like start Yeah, that's Dave. That looks like a dangerous attack and those hooves like hard as a stone

They're just is this a doe or is this a buck that Woody's fighting? It's a buck. He wants to fuck you. Every scenario I've ever seen, it's where some dumb hunter put the doe urine on himself, and the deer thinks that he's a doe in heat, and he's all fired up, and he's either angry that he's not a doe. He's half horny, half rage mode. It's the worst thing you could ever— I was going to say, if the situation is can Woody beat not a doe. He's like half horny, half rage mode. It's the worst thing you could ever... I was gonna say, if the situation is, can Woody beat up a doe,

I think you're gonna take some licks when it does that thing, but if you can catch a few and slow it down, I think you might be able to at least wound it. A buck, you're fucked. You're done. You're gonna strike it? No, you're gonna have to basically...

He's trying to box it. He's trying to box it. No, all you'd have to do is get it on the ground and then break one of its little legs. Like, breaking its little thin legs is the only way you're going to win that. That, I don't know, that seems difficult to me. I'm telling you. As a person who knows nothing realistically

about the anatomy of these animals, I just don't imagine you can grab their paws, their hooves, and break it. You know, the way early man did. That's how our ancestors hunted. They faced off with the deer in the wild and went to the leg and snapped it quickly with our incredibly powerful hands.

You can get in there and grab them and go sideways, open it up, how it's not meant to be opened. But at least we have hands i'm thinking neck punch fist down throat eye pokes weaknesses these are claws and we are alpha predators and and you're not giving us the credit we deserve need something with hooves that's a badass oh man a moose a moose would fuck you up a miniature miniature goat. A mini goat. A mini goat? I like my odds against a mini goat.

Absolutely. You could punt a mini goat and rupture its liver or something like that. But you deal with a cow. And I'm not talking about running up the bulls wearing Pamplona or something. No, no, no. This is just a cow you'd see on the side of the road in South Carolina. If that thing, like a 300-pound little calf, like a seven- seven month old thing, oh, that thing will whip your ass. Well, that thing will whip your ass because it's so low with its center of gravity.

I'd be silly. And if you ever face, like I've punched a big cow in the head to try to make it move. It was like being stubborn and we're in close quarters and they can't get to me. And I'm just, fuck you. And I popped it in the head. It was the worst. See, I feel like I create wall in the head. It was the worst. I feel like I pre-wall. The cat didn't even feel it.

It just hurt me really bad. Have you ever been attacked by a cat, just like a regular little house cat, where it decides for some reason that, like, I'm fucking this guy up, and it runs up your leg, and it gives you some pitter-pattering, and you know, with every little of those little cat paws,

it's like the only reason I'm not getting fucked up and maybe losing an eye from this little bitch right now is because it got taken to a vet and declawed. That's what the animal world is. 18-second video. We have to watch human versus cow. I don't want to change topics. I want to talk about this cow thing.

Yeah, let's do cow. We've got to get to the man being eaten, but I'm glad you linked this because I've seen this shit go down in real life, and this is what fucking happens when you mess with a Cap. Alright, you guys ready? Ready, set, play. Oh, oh, you don't touch the baby Cap. All I'm seeing is an animal with no real offense. The only thing, you can't fall down.

Yes. You can't fall down. Not even against the mini goat. Even against the mini goat, you can't fall down. Really? I feel like I could grab it by a little mini horn and flip it like Bam Bam. Can you do that if you fall down? If it trips you up, if you try and grab it and it's really quick and it scurries between your legs and you

fall over, that's where you don't want to be. You don't want to be there, I'll agree. A lot of what helps fighting a person, Woody, which you do have experience with, is that you know you're fighting a rational mind. You know when you punch with your right arm, you have a thousand percent

certitude that that person is going to back away from that punch how every other person does and then probably respond with their own punch. You know exactly. When you're coming after a deer, just a fucking deer. We're not talking about a cow, just a deer. Maybe you get real close and it stutters off. And it's, oh, I'm a little nervous. I'm a little nervous at this big bipedal ape walking towards me.

Then maybe it makes no visual cues because it's a fucking deer. And you walk a little closer to it. And then it decides to go bananas and jump at you and start clawing and start poking and it catches you in the mouth maybe catches you in the the eye like you're i'm really coming around to kyle's side i really feel like the wild animal respect mythos has gone too far in my opinion i really feel like people are saying look woody a rabbit would fuck you up. You don't understand. It's a wild animal. They have claws. They have this and that. Dude, I can grab a lop-eared rabbit by the ears and hold it even when it's alive.

They've got that loose skin on the back of their shoulders. Yeah, but now you're moving the goalposts. I have moved the goalposts, but I feel like people have just gone too far with the respect where we're now all of a sudden like these like grass eating, grazing animals can't be taken out by the biggest predator the planet's seen. No, I would say the question is isn't under the circumstances of the standard behavior. Like if you're fighting a rabbit, this rabbit wants you dead. That's that. I've done that. I think you would kill the rabbit in a millisecond even the strongest rabbit in the world is gonna it'll take you under 10 minutes to

have it completely killed i think i like assuming i can catch it an important thing to remember is like i i believe like 90 of the animals out there we're better off off winning that battle by screaming and dancing and moving scary. If you do that, you could beat a grizzly bear. But if you walk up to the grizzly bear and punch it in the face, that's when it's going to be like, wait, you have no power. I thought you were some sort of magician or warlock. I thought you were sure you were a staffer. Send me into another plane of existence. I've gone up against a regular bear and it's on youtube uh it was a brown bear and we were hiking in yosemite and this guy uh

the fuck was his name it was dan's friend anyway he was um he was filming the whole thing and it wasn't like it was me mano a mano against a bear but there were like five people or so saying go bear scat bear run bear bad bear don't steal that picnic basket and uh yeah and and the bear like i think it actually maybe did steal some potato chips or something but it like got a grip or something and then it scurried off uh scared they were it was like a giant raccoon. Yeah, that's like when you describe human beings as predators It's not really fair Like we're only predators and on top because we conquered the whole planet and we took all of the environment You know nature and made it our thing now

There are whole foods in nature now There are our Walmart's and restaurants and concrete and like so we dominate a world world that's not, wait, wait, wait, we dominate a world that's like totally artificial, you know? Like when we were on the plains of the Serengeti or wherever we fucking were, like we were not beating shit up. We were running dozens of miles to catch deer

because we couldn't beat them in fights. That's what we were doing. We were running down with spears and hopefully big cats don't see us. So it was only when we got engines and atlatls and shit that we started turning it around. We were a losing franchise. All right. Come on.

Give someone else a chance. Animals that get eaten have eyes on their sides, right? Animals that eat people have eyes in front. We're looking for shit. Those other people are looking not to get eaten. We have claws on our hands, right? These aren't hooves. These aren't like vegan instruments here.

How effective would you say they are? What's the most impressive thing you've ever done with your claws? I can do lots of awesome shit. I can unlock doors. You're literally cleaning yourself. Yeah. Because a grizzly bear, it can use its claws to tear the door off a car.

I could wipe my butt, a feat that most of nature would be really impressed with. Oh, with your nails? That's the best part, though, cleaning it out later. I've never done that. Wait, Woody, has there ever been a jar that your apex predator claws couldn't open? Probably, although I can't think of it right now.

No, but we are predators we are hunters yeah i mean we just we just made up for the whole claw thing by making tools like when a horse sees us they say oh shit like that thing's built like one of those animal eaters you know it's got claws it's got eyes on the front. That's how we are. Maybe they're just like, oh my god, every old horse I know talks about their uncle who died when it got ridden off into a horrible, loud area and they never come back. I don't know. I feel like every animal is scared of humans. And from what I heard, we're really smelly.

Every animal smells us coming from a very far distance away and apparently we're like you know not no animals care to associate with with us you know this is this goes this goes back like we're traders you don't want this big stinky weird, weird, slimy ape. This bag of flesh walking around. All hair fell out. There's got to be something wrong with it. So would that make dogs like the Uncle Toms? You know humans have been loud since the beginning. You know that.

Would dogs be like the Uncle Toms, like the house servants of the animal kingdom? They absolutely are. Yes. And they're having the best life out of any animal because of that. Yeah. yes the dogs have the best life out of any animal because of that yeah i think if you think about humans like our bodies and our abilities like everything like even like even like the goofiest dogs can pull off some maneuvers that would just be difficult for athletic humans you know comparable to the size we've never been like slick you know i can't imagine we were when we

were good hunters like most of us were probably like really shitty. And that's why we're like, we have to think up a way to do this. So we start throwing things and stuff like that or just like, I guess we'll just follow it for four days until it gets tired. How many animals on the Serengeti or wherever do you think humans went one on one against before they go go, oh my god, we're running out of fucking people, and this is early on, guys. Like, we gotta pick the weakest looking thing, and honestly, guys, don't shoot it down right away. How about we just chase it

till it gets tired, and then get it? Okay, alright, let's try that. And that's what we ended up doing, because you know that the biggest, strongest guy tried to take down a big cat, and then he tried to take down a small cat, and then a couple people together tried to take down a big cat. And then he tried to take down a small cat. And then a couple people together tried to take down a small cat. And they kept coming back with a dead guy.

Like, it's just, it doesn't work. We got food! That's not true either. Now, there are African tribes where, like, a right, like, a man is to kill a lion. Did you ever see the ghost in the darkness? No, they fucking kill a lion with one man one lion one spear what's that well no wonder it's still a tiny tribe what is that a lot of men tell me about that one head lion killer there's that scene in the ghost in the darkness where they're which is

a true story about the lions of savo where that happened in like the early 1900s or something they're trying to the british are trying to build this bridge and there are two man-eating lions that are eating the workers that are working on the railroad. This is a true story. Those lions are right now in the Museum of National History stuffed. You can go look at them. They killed hundreds of people before it was all said and done,

before they finally killed these lions. In the film, which kind of butters the story up just a little bit as if it weren't fantastic enough, they ask this native African guy. He's like, I killed a lion once guy he's like it's like he's like i killed a lion once and he's got the claws like on a necklace and the guy's like how many shorts it take you and he's like i use my hands that's fucking hardcore but yeah watch

the ghost in the darkness with val kilmer uh that's a good movie no he kills the lion you told me i don't need to see it now we already know who wins the humans always win in these animal battles like but see what you're you're moving or the planet of the apes i don't know i don't know i'm not even rooting for the humans anymore no those apes are they're not rooting for apes for for a chimpanzee they're the meanest human on earth can't touch a casual chimpanzee's maliciousness the meanest human on earth. Can't touch a casual chimpanzees maliciousness. Like if, if you put Hitler in the same room as a couple of chimps and you just like let him watch him,

he'd be like, Oh, that is a little fucked up. No, he, he might need a couple of those fingers. You know, all right.

I'll be in the corner. Like that. Like animals are brutal. That's what's so scary about them is they have no like even someone who's tanked drunk at a bar and who gets in a fight might be like well i'm gonna take this bottle and i'm not gonna go to jail for this like no there's no no animal things about that they don't think oh maybe i won't go whole hog against this guy's face with my little hooves. Yeah, yeah, no, it's because, like, monkeys and chimpanzees, they have the ability to be like, oh, my God, I could do damage with that thing right there and pick it up but not have the next step of contemplation to be like, but after, it's going to be a really bad idea.

So he knows how to use it. He just doesn't really think of the concept't really think they have no foresight but like and that's another thing like i i remember i was like a couple years ago i was like oh i want to i want a chimpanzee that would be cool to have maybe i can get a chimp and like looking it up and very quickly getting into like these intense attacks and stuff like that and looking i'm just being like this is a really bad thing to get i did that same thing after her dog died these are their weapons. This and this mouth with worse teeth. Just imagine this

really strong killing. It sucks. It's not sharp. It's not clean. It's really, really brutal. After my dog died, Kyle was like, Woody, you should get a wolf. I was like, you know what, Kyle? You make a strong point. I should totally have a wolf as a pet. I started looking into other people who had wolves as pets,

and Kyle was giving me some really bad advice there. I remember feeling like a fucking madman at the time because for two episodes straight, you guys were genuinely on the wolf boat of, no, I'm going to get a wolf. I'm going to get a wolf. I was like, no, you have children, Woody. And when Hope comes home and she's 25, that's still a child to that wolf.

It doesn't care. It turns out that they're really big. But the bigger thing is they're timid and they never really become part of the family. They're always looking at you cross-eyed. They don't give you what dogs give you, is like you know a canine member of the family they just skeptical yeah they're skeptical they're timid they're scared dogs think they're people wolves know what that they're fucking wolves yeah and i guess it sounded to me like they had sort of a fear aggression that would be really bad in a dog but just multiply that by 10 and put it in a

wolf and now you've got the one that i saw um it had it was really good friends with the pig the big wild boar that they also had as a pet and so we went out riding and we saw a rabbit and fucking shot the rabbit with suppressed pistol and and to feed the wolf he was like oh shoot the rabbit we'll feed it the wolf as i shoot the rabbit take it back to the wolf and you know it's a big texas rabbit it's a foot long maybe you know the bullet to get it out does it go right through 45 i mean It went on through the rabbit and into the ground. Any of it didn't. The wolf don't care. We throw it to the wolf

and him and the pig each have an end of the rabbit. They're pulling the rabbit back and forth. It's not a mean sort of thing like two bulldogs that are growling. It's more like, they both just want half this rabbit and this is how you get a rabbit in half. Finally, it was just... They both just went their separate ways with their halves of the rabbit and ate it in their

own way the pig was pretty gross about it he was kind of like grinding it up and but the wolf was just and it was gone um but yeah i i know uh i i've met a guy a couple times who also has a pet wolf and he lives in uh basically in the woods and um you know your neighbors are you know a couple kilometers away uh you know a mile two miles away from one another and it's just like thick woods with like a hot like a very like you know like random highway just connecting them and um he said whenever he would go to his friend's house and it's true like the wolf was never part of the family like it never went into the house to stay like it slept outside by choice like it preferred

to be outside lurking around all of like the cabins he has like all these cabins just lurking prowling rather than being inside and if it went inside it was always like at the doorway but it was his and like you know he went out and he would like pet it and stuff like that on like really cold nights would like come in but when he went to his friend's house when he would get there like shortly after the wolf would show up so like he would go and get into his car and he would drive about like 10 minutes to his buddies and about like 45 minutes after getting there the wolf's there who would just she would just make her way to him like she's just like out there and it's like you're talking like a dog times 100

it just goes out there and it's like this way and just starts going and you know he has like a couple friends nearby and like you know the wolf would follow him and then make its way back and it was always back there and one time he brought it to a dog run we're like you know like you go to the park the dog park and all these dogs are running around and he uh he brought her and when he was going in there was two dogs like a rottweiler and a pitbull that were just running around like being really playful but knowing that they're the alphas they're like rolling over the other dogs and stuff people are pulling their dogs out other big dogs are just like you know like whoa relax guys like you know like in the corner and stuff like that and these two dogs are just killing it and when he brought the wolf over she does look like a big husky

she didn't look like a wolf until he told me he's like it's a wolf she's a small wolf could it have been i thought i was like what's that could it have been a hybrid they do that a lot yeah you know it may have been it may have been um and that actually might might be what it was but it was it just looked like a big ass husky but it looked like a dog and these dogs are like running around and he brought the dog in and you know the guy who owns the dogs were like oh watch it they're really uh wild and he was like oh she doesn't really play much she'll just ignore him he's like well i don't know if they could ignore him and he brought the dog in and um well the wolf in and these two dogs came running up to it and went like right up to it

like full speed like you know where they just want to run and like i don't know smell your butt and stuff but they're gonna smash into you and just be like really overly aggressive and as soon as they came into proximity she barked and like it was like a howl bark like it's like wolves don't it's it's not something you do it's like a defense mechanism like it's like it lets people know like i'm not fucking playing your shit and this is like it's literally like a demonstration of power level it's like charging your chi and dragon ball you just everyone's like oh shit and like you know you just get a reading on it and uh apparently like one of the dogs froze and the other dog completely tipped over this like a wolf's bark like this this this hybrid wolf it was so strong it's like a hundred times louder than a

dog's bark it's just like it's a completely different animal it's a wild animal and anyways these two dogs got fucked up by the wolf bark geez all right let's watch this guy get eaten by the goddamn snake okay all right uh where do we want to start it? I honestly don't know. Yeah. Let's see. Could this asshole not have filmed this with half of every shot this dude's shoulder? Are you playing it? I'm at zero. I'm skipping around looking for a good place to start.

I think we start at like a minute 25. That's a pretty good place. Minute 25? Yeah. Because they're about to start cutting. All right. Yeah, and we can talk over this one. Is everyone ready?

Yeah, for sure. This is all in Indonesian. Yeah, I'm ready. Ready, set, play. All right, so the volume is off because they're not speaking in English. Yeah, you'll never see a video where they cut a man out of a snake, and they're all like, oh, my God, is that Brent? Yeah, it is. it is oh bro that's

brent in there like you'll hear oh my god and there's a couple guys in the background even like chuckling about this like who's laughing there are people in this video like chuckling like oh that's what happens when you drink and hang out in the swamp it's this guy you can see his leg at the bottom oh they're about to start like is this not remind you guys of that website way back in a day where you could see i saw a guy was like i swear they cut a guy out of an alligator in an old internet picture dude so i did this paramotor race last weekend and uh there was like a real chance that people were going to land an alligator infested swamps like i had to attach flotation and stuff to my paramotor to make

it safer. And then there was this big debate like, oh, the alligators, they're more scared of you than you are of them. Really watch out for the pythons. The pythons are the problem. Look at this guy. That's what it is. Don't worry about the alligators. You should be worried about the pythons. Yeah, as if that made me feel better.

Yeah, I was like, no, no, I'm fully entitled to be worried about both of those. I'm your team yep so this this giant group of people wearing their 2016 pittsburgh steelers super bowl champs shirts are standing around slicing a snake open vertically this thing is enormous like as girthy as a as a human body now because there's one there's a human body in there. They're starting to cut it and it's exactly like what it would look like in a movie. I don't know what I thought it would look like.

It looks like a rapper fell asleep in his snakeskin sleeping bag. That's what it looks like right now. They're waking him up very carefully. Why is he a rapper in this scenario? Because he's a snakeskin sleeping bag. Okay, okay. it's either that or steve irwin you know i saw they sold tauntaun sleeping bags and i thought that was the coolest

thing this is the coolest did this snake die eating this man i think they killed it and to recover their friend i think it was okay you know i don't think eating a man hurt this snake wait no but when they recovered their friend like they mean like recover their friend oh he's dead i mean that's his butt right there he's he's down he's absolutely very dead he's very dead you look you know he was dead before he got swallowed probably yeah or just paralyzed yeah they could they constrict you and and and they suffocate you to death you can't oh that's what it is it's just like this is like a suffocation swallow yeah yeah it doesn't have any venom it's got like uh they have teeth but they're like long and kind of curved backwards for like

grabbing and and pulling like it's it doesn't have venom but i know of i bet he i bet all his ribs are broken i bet he's got internal bleeding just from being crushed maybe suffocated beforehand i was so intact man like It's a little creepy. They can't chew. They have to eat it like that. It's not like you'll find it in pieces ever. I would imagine that it was going to digest him over the period of months.

Right. This was not Friday's meal. This was the summer meal. I feel like it's if it's like i feel like it's uh probably really strong i mean i i don't think you think that would take months how long does it take them to digest like i've seen them eat shit like

deer sized before i think they don't eat that often i was gonna say weeks but i think they don't eat that often like once a month you get back so that you can see like the guys his thighs his legs his butt his back up to like maybe the bottom of his shoulders and then that's it and it is gruesome that's the end of video there that is that would have been its food for like a month like that's the benefit one of the few benefits i guess of being cold blooded is you don't have to spend all those calories on regulating your body temperature so you can just make a meal last forever. I would consider that a disadvantage. You know how fat I'd be if I didn't have to regulate my body temperature? Yeah, but you'd have

one, like, there would be, every restaurant would be out of business. Did you see the following video that was recommended? It says human text pregnant cow giant animal. I'm all over it right now. Link it to me. I didn't get it. Let me link everybody. It's a 10 minute

video, so we'll need to find our spot. But this man is literally defending this cow with like an axe or something. Like a matic or like a gardening implement with a blade or something. Alright, yeah, let's find a moment here. But just this cow got like caught up in the swamp. Like, I don't know how it got in there.

That doesn't seem too crazy to me skip to two minutes to know I've seen this science fiction looking shit cuz you see the the cow wrapped up and then you see the things like net head and help all right big two minutes you guys ready to play yeah I'm all set it to ready set play exposure cameraman exposure so this snake is already I'm all set at two. Ready, set, play. Exposure, cameraman, exposure. So this snake is already all the way wrapped around. It's the cow here.

I think the head is. It looks like it's like this. Yeah, I agree. And that thing is just a giant tendril of muscle. Like, there's not anything on that. It's just an enormous bicep, is what that thing is. Oh, the cow's gone.

What are you pulling on its tail for, you jackass? I was wondering, at this point, once you got the snake, the thing free, why do you want to pull that snake? This is when I like seeing people hurt by animals is because what did you think would fucking happen or could happen when you picked a fight

with a 20 foot long 500 pounds i'll tell you what's gonna happen they're taking it with them i said they're gonna kill it they're taking it all of the people get a get an arm under this motherfucker and they take it all of them they. They're all smiling and laughing while they carry it fucking away, presumably to eat. This is... I mean, again, it's volume. Well, then that's fair and square. That's fair and square.

And humans win. Yes. Now, you see, if it wasn't for this video, you would have sure... We're so dominant that some of us are there taking pictures. All of you would have said, Woody, you dramatically underestimate how powerful this python is. Humans have no weapons. We're just worthless little, you know, like, I don't know, savannah slugs.

We're not talking about a fair fight, though. This thing, like once upon a time, this was like an epic victory for a small village the snake that terrorized them for so now it's like oh snake out back honey grab the camera grab the kids pick it up we're just walking its ass back inside where we're gonna throw it in our microwave if you're gonna pit man against beast you gotta play fair now you're saying oh look at this like like there's people taking pictures while they whip that anaconda's ass but the people who are doing the whipping are in a group using teamwork and weapons but so wait teamwork and weapons because the brain is a weapon so that means you how do you feel you versus uh like a tiger but you're both naked and you both have no teeth

and no claws oh my god that tiger you strip all weapons when he has no teeth and no claws. Oh my god, that tiger is going to murder. He stripped all weapons. He has no teeth and no claws? How long do you last with that tiger? Pretty long. Not even a minute. What's he going to do? He's going to gump you to 500 pounds. It hits you in the face.

You're toast. You might just be quicker to grasp the no claws thing faster than the tiger. So it might just have these to grasp the no claws thing faster than the tiger so it might just have these big goofy paws swing swinging at you i don't know how to make a tire gloves how about how about this and also you know those goofy things that people have where it's like a wolverine spike where you hold on to it like the the three things coming out. Give that to the human, and it still dies in under a minute. Because that giant tiger paw, first of all, it's faster than any human has ever been. Like, it's coming at you at the speed of that slap that no human can react to.

Like, Conor McGregor would still be throwing monster cans at him. Yeah, but you know what? Throwing monster cans at them. Yeah, but you know what? Here's the thing. There's always, like, where we are now, there's, like, a tactical precedence that's occurred to, like, that if we were to, whichever human was going into this battle,

trained for this battle, which a tiger would not be able to do, we would be able to strategize. Like, yeah, they could swing faster for sure but there's got to be some strategy or protection against that to use it against the tiger like the thing is in that fight like we could study the tiger i mean you throw a human loose in there with a tiger loose in there tigers got bigger claws and the primal instinct it'll win but if you give like a human like six months of planning and we let a thousand humans one by one fight a thousand tigers how often do we win in that

most of the time because we don't play fair we make it we make like a tiger pit no no there's a snare or we make a trap and yeah no it's one v one one v one in the octagon you get the tiger claws but you can train for a year you get to train for a year it'll never it'll never well if you don't get weapons or the or the access to like construct them then you're just gonna die every time because even the claws you get those claws oh the claws huh well you've got to be a real impressive human being you got to be like one of these like ufc guys who's gonna come in there with with some serious let me jump in i i feel like so i've got wolverine claws right which

is basically just knives that you hold funny and so i have knives and that the tiger now has no teeth and no claws yeah we've really taken away his offense on this i really think if i said by eight or nine hundred pounds he's he's 10 or 12 feet long he's you're assuming the tiger knows to to pounce on him weight first only weight win by weight it might nod him with like gummy mouth is that mouth strong enough just gums to to like bite off woody's arm i think so i think no no it's not well hold on it's not strong enough to bite off his arm without gums, I wouldn't think. But what a tiger does first, because it's a big

cat, is it's going to get its big gummy but still enormously powerful mouth on the back of Woody's neck and he's going to break your neck in half a second. Like a tiger's mouth with no teeth is still going to break your neck with ease and then drag you away. It's so much stronger than us.

A tiger podcast out there where they're like, dude, it doesn't matter drag you away. It's so much stronger than us. A tiger podcast out there where they're like, dude, it doesn't matter what you do. The human just gets its knife into your belly and you're so fucked. There's no defense. They put the knife into your belly, your chest, your neck. They've got knives on them and you're completely defenseless. I tried biting their neck and then he just reached around.

Those arms go in tons of different directions. They're not like tiger arms. They're flexible and they have all these joints and stuff. You can't fuck with humans with knives. That's so true. A tiger would look at us and be like, oh, my God, their arms are weird. Yeah, yeah. You know what they would notice also is they'd go,

what's that weird thing they do when you get your gummy mouth and you bite their neck or hands? Like they scream. They scream so loud. That's weird. Terry, my tiger co-host, what do you do when you're grievously wounded? Well, I just get furious and stronger and angry because my IQ is 21 and I don't understand my surroundings and just confusing to me.

And like, and so you, you have so much more insight and intelligence as a human that it will come back around to bite you because you will be as prepared as you think you are until you see Gums McGillicuddy coming over the top of that hill and you go, oh, oh, oh, this got real. That's a tiger. No, that's way bigger. That's way bigger.

That's the size of a Porsche. And they're not as big as Kyle said they are. This tiger weighed about 400 pounds. I thought those things So I looked it up. A male tiger A tiger could be like 700 pounds, no? Let me go. A male tiger weighs 220 to 675. So 220 to 675.

A female tiger weighs 200 to 368. Now, I feel like if we're putting me in there as what, a slightly above average sized dude. I'm not Harley, but I'm whatever, 6 foot. That's just above average, I think. It should be above average sized dude? I'm not Harley, but I'm whatever, six foot. That's just above average, I think. It should be above average, too.

Around 400, 450. The thing is, this is 400 pounds the way a UFC fighter carries it. 400 pounds of purpose. Every ounce of that muscle is made for something. What are you suggesting, Taylor?

To also be fair, tigers at that size are rarely fed enough to maintain the amount of calories they require to operate on a daily basis, so they're usually pretty hungry and starved. They can eat 60 to 70 pounds of meat in one sitting. We're talking about if it's a male, right? 490 pounds and 10 feet long of cat. It's true, cat also.

Have you ever dealt with a house cat that was unruly? I remember when I was a kid, we had a cat called Hercules. Hercules probably weighed about 12 pounds. And he was a real problem. He just scratched people and he was aggressive. Like he had to go. We got to catch Hercules and he was a real problem he just scratched people and he was aggressive like he had to go we got to catch hercules and he's just gotta fucking go we're not kill hercules but can't be around here i did that with a rabbit same problem capture we i have to capture this thing in the laundry room and i've got a laundry basket upside down and just

finally put it over him he's going so ape shit and wild in there but he like he'll like bite something and then start spinning his whole body in like a death roll roll and just ferocious animal and you're literally multiplying that by 50 or whatever to make it 500 pounds i i had an unruly rabbit no chance it was the same thing like like so we kept the rabbit in the cage yeah and the rabbit was like it was a bad rabbit and then we got dogs and it was a bad rabbit and then we got dogs and it became a terrible rabbit because all the dogs wanted to do was look at the rabbit constantly and i guess he became like terrified and we were young and we were stupid and well that about explains a lot of things we did at the time so um like the rabbit i think we were

cleaning its cage and it attacked me just one too many fucking times you know could you describe a rabbit attack because yeah so rabbits have um almost tiger-like claws they're long but they don't retract yeah and the teeth on them are like uh beaver teeth almost like they're long and they're yeah they never stop growing you know why the the rabbit's teeth are sort of a reddish color just like the beavers it's it's because of the act the iron in their teeth it forms like an iron oxide color it's because their teeth actually have iron in them so they bite and they scratch and like a cat it seems like they can scratch you almost regardless of how you hold them like they manage to twist and flip and get a a claw on you and i was trying to remove it from its cage to clean it it just went bonkers on me and i had had enough of it and um eventually i just i handled it roughly i grabbed it by the

flappy skin on behind its shoulders and then i cupped its like hiney and sort of just pointed all its weapons away and i took it outside and i put it in we lived in this townhouse so there was like in the trash it was like a quad front, like an open area where kids would play and stuff. So I put the rabbit there and like prayed for a hawk, right? And then like 30, 40 minutes goes by, and the rabbit is waiting for me to let it back in. And I'm like, no, no, no. You are not my rabbit anymore. So I took it a little further into the woods, and that's really where the story ends.

I don't know what happened next, but I have an idea. That rabbit was killed quickly. Not quick enough. I was like, oh, I overplayed my hand back there. Watch this time stamp. You only need like eight seconds of it. I think this is a depiction of what could happen in a man

versus rabbit scenario. Interesting. This is Monty Python. They know their biology. Ready, set, play. Oh wait, I have the... That's it! Jesus Christ! I warned you! Did you listen to me? That's about how it went. Yeah. It's sort of like that. And if you don't have a whole bunch of hands, what are you gonna do?

But having said that, when I decided to win the fight, the fight was over. The rabbit was only scratching and getting the best of me when I had its best interests in mind. As soon as I put my interests in the forefront, that rabbit was scooped up, held by the bottom, and tossed outside like a rabbit. Imagine, if you will,

that rabbit, but it's 500 pounds of muscle, and it's a predator. It's very stealthy, with enormous claws, and it can climb quickly, and it's a predator. And it's very stealthy with enormous claws, and it can climb quickly, and it's so fast, you can just clip your neck with its gummy orange no-teeth. Watch that video of the man literally being killed. There's that video of the man sitting on his butt in the tiger enclosure.

The tiger walks up to him like, hey, what are you, man? And it plays with him for a second, and the guy kicks at him, and he's like, oh, you don't play nice. and he bites the guy by the neck and carries him off and as soon as he bites him those teeth going into his jugular jugular and like maybe breaking his neck i don't know it seems like the life leaves his body as soon as he's bitten and then he's carried away like a like have you ever seen a cat carry a dead mouse or lizard it's just like it's apparently a 1200 psi i think uh a tiger bite. He carries human bites. I carry groceries.

But the thing is I've never argued that I could beat a 500-pound rabbit or a tiger or anything like that. I say, you know what? I think you're giving deers too much respect. Or, hey, I think a toothless, clawless tiger is getting too much respect. Not real. Like I didn't say I could beat a 500-pound rabbit. I've invited you to come along on the boar hunt i more than anything i want to go on the boar hunt with the dogs with the kevlar vest

get some kevlar chaps on get a lance i'm down for it chaps just cover the front right yeah oh you and they don't mind they're into that you with the boots and the chaps like everybody dresses that way i love this now kyle's trying to convince me that it'll be all right. Oh, yeah, everyone dresses in assless chaps. That's boar hunting standard procedure. Everybody, everybody's sunscreen is on their bottoms. You want to go over to Larry, ask him to do yours. He loves it.

Do you ever look at like stupid lists online of animals? Like I'm looking at the top 10 which animals have the strongest bite. Do you ever look at fictional lists? I was scrolling through looking for the tiger, just being like, four, five? No, it can't be not on here. And then you get upset at fictional lists for not including your favorite animals higher. That's what they were doing. Apparently, alligators and crocodiles dominate this bite shit.

And hippopotamus. And the hippo is up there. Jaguar, bull shark, gorilla. Hippopotamus. Oh, jaguar. That's interesting. Polar bear. Hippopotamus is apparently like one of the most vicious animals on the entire planet.

It kills more people in Africa than any other animal. Yeah, apparently it's just like the most unapproachable animal on the entire planet. Back when Steve Irwin was alive, the crocodile hunter, this guy used to swim with crocodiles and alligators all the time. He would wrestle with them in water, and he was cool with that. Some would say he was reckless. He was like 200 feet from hippos, scared to death. Yeah, that's exactly what I was thinking.

He wouldn't do hippos. He wanted no feet from hippos. What ever happened to him? Scared to death. Yeah, that's exactly what I was thinking. He wouldn't do hippos. He wanted no part of hippos. I saw him with hippos, and he was scared of hippos from a long way away. Hippos are one of those animals that if you touch it, you know it feels as hard as a rock. They're fast also. I saw that hippo chase that boat, and it looked like it had a goddamn propeller on it with a 50-horsepower motor. It's nuts that big you think of hippos as these big fat like chunks of blubber almost you think of hungry hungry hippos everyone does it moved so fast through that water that the water was like parting in front of and creating a wake like no one fucks with hippos except for that

bird i have the video i'm not positive let's give it a try and do you know how they do this so they're not actually swimming they are running on the bottom of the the water the lake bed so that when they're doing that they're sprinting cue up at zero ready set play that's a hippo yeah yes and so they it's charging look at it. Yeah, it's running on the bottom running underwater is so much Crazier than swimming. I'm looking at this. He's closer than you think It's like a people that thing looks so fat that's one of those fat that like if you touched it I bet that it feels like you're touching a pickup truck It's so hard and solid like you you watch them getting

Mounted by lions who are like all the female lionesses are trying to bite on their back and bite different areas and those things Like honestly you have to wonder if those are just really supremely stupid animals because they don't even seem to concern themselves With other predators like it's not even a thought. Which one? Hippos. Hippo. I'm trying to find the one of the hippos. The lions on them.

But lions usually attack out of desperation. Like, lions, when they attack, if a lion's attacking a hippo, they are extremely hungry. Oh, yeah. You ever see the... No, on Reddit hungry. What about the baby hippo? You ever see the – No, on Reddit, they've got the baby hippo subreddit, and they're so fucking cute. Baby hippos are super cute, but the giant ones are – How big do hippos get? There's a lot of those animals that just read a number.

We were talking about tigers earlier. We said 500 pounds. I can't picture that. I really can't. I can't fathom 500 pounds I've never lifted that much I have no idea what it is a male hippopotamus

weighs up to 4,000 pounds see that is that's not a thing and it can run 20 miles 4,000 pounds it can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour.

It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour.

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It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour.

It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour.

It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an hour. It can run 20 miles an I've done some bad math lately. I'm taking in this footage here of these lions attacking this hippo at the same time. If you're doing that, they're really hungry. Oh, yeah. That's not the first choice of snack. They don't go, what do you want, kids? It's also weird that the male's there with them. Yeah.

It's like this hippo wandered into their camp. We've done almost an hour in fighting animals. Should we stick with it? Not just on fighting animals, on the animal kingdom at large. This is the animal kingdom.

My bad. No, you're good. You're good. I love it. This is perfect. Yeah, yeah. I don't think anybody's... There's nobody going,

God damn, I wish they'd talk about hockey in Asia. Man. Oh, fuck you. But you know what? The fact that we're on animal talk i'm i'm i love talking about animals and all the nonsense you see oh we have issues in my house with animals i haven't told anyone i don't think so we have rats we have three dogs and um two of them are great danes and one of

them is this yellow lab mix the yellow lab mix has always been scared of everything, but not really aggressive. And I don't know what it is, if he's getting senile or something, but the Lab has been ramping up his aggressiveness lately and picking fights with the Danes. And it's not going well for him at all. We have to take him to the vet and get him stitched up again and stuff. I was gone, I forget where I was. Maybe, whatever. I was out of the house somewhere. And I come home, and Jackie had taken all the dogs

and put them in the guest house, not knowing this was going to escalate like it did. Buddy's fucked. You know, he's got, like, patches of fur missing and, like, a bunch of wounds that we thought might have been stitch-worthy. And the issue is his aggression. Yeah, the issue is his... He needs Prozac.

That's what we're thinking. We're like, should we drug him? Can we get him on an anti-anxiety thing? It's two things if you ask me. One thing I've seen with older dogs is when dogs are in pain, they absolutely will not let you know it. It's like the dog has this thought in its head that like if if I show the boss that Like I'm not quite the dog. I used to be he'll fucking you know it's it's a rid of jungle

I'll be gone like I can't show any weakness or pain so like these dogs will get arthritis and stuff and it may it might be Excruciating them for just just to hop up in your lap now But they'll never show it and that makes them super ornery and like weird and it's not always like a dementia I've seen dogs that literally have some sort of retardation kitties dog show it and that makes them super ornery and like weird and it's not always like a dementia i've seen dogs that literally have some sort of retardation kitty's dog is is not all there like i had a dog it's funny you know it's it's it's a funny acting dog that the looks it gives you it'll start sneezing when it's happy it'll just and it'll sneeze it'll just it'll just like twitch and like spin in circles and sneeze over and over

and it's and if you're and if you like encourage you're like oh that's a good little girl you really love it don't you don't you don't you don't you she just sneezes more and more and more and just just starts freaking the fuck out whatever your dog is just like has horrible ocd so every time it hears like good girl it has to sneeze four times it's like who's a good girl who's a good girl who's a real good girl and it's like real good girl? And it's like, ah, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. But yeah, Prozac also, like, I've seen that chill dogs the fuck out. And like, I kind of feel weird about Prozac-ing anything and anyone, you know? Like if I had a kid, it'd be weird to like put them on a downer.

Something that fix, it seems like you're taking away part of what makes them them if you're putting somebody on a downer like that in a regimen. But I've seen it with dogs, and it's just like, oh, yeah, she's still friendly, and she's still playing with the ball and excited and everything, except now when the mailman comes, it's not World War III. It's not like a fight or flight scenario. So I can get near Buddy when he eats, but if the other dogs do, then it becomes an aggressive thing. Or Buddy has a

spot staked out under the kitchen table and if the other dogs come by, he'll growl and such. And he never liked it, but he'd never get aggressive. And now Buddy's starting fights. Dude, I almost want to... I feel like if I brought him around, people would think I'm a bad dog on her. And we're not. We take him, we get it, they

care, they eat the most expensive food jackie can find and um like and you know they someone's home with them all the time like like are there places to run like we think of ourselves as really good dog owners but this situation that had been good for buddy for whatever eight years now i feel like it's turned bad yeah i've seen that same thing um our dogs have had that like my dad's dogs i should say you know sometimes there'll just be a group dynamic that just isn't gonna work and it's unsustainable i don't think that's what you have this sounds like something has happened and like i like prozac ought to fix it but he's had dogs that are just

diametrically opposed and this is never gonna work you know like like it's it's like a real life like dog drama playing out day to day with the jealousies are just and the bad blood is just too much and to the point where like you come back one day and there's a fucking dead dog well are we gonna allow a murderer to stay in our midst well he's not a murderer now that that dog's dead that dog murdered that other dog you know and it's like i think we've got to kill dog number one for killing dog number two or all the other dogs gonna be like well i guess that we just kill each other right yeah boss don't care so we had to kill dog number one it was fucked lose two dogs in one day and then the fighting thing like like dad

always had the smaller dog and the big dogs would often like grab it and of course it had these big scars on it where it had been stitched up over and over. It was like this little jack rat terrier that had, like, battle wounds like a gladiator because it had faced it. And it was almost like that. You know, if you look back at, like, someone like Boss Rootin who had all those crazy fights over the years, it's like, oh, yeah, from Frank Shamrock to Pro Cop, whoever he faced. He faced this guy and that guy. Whether he won or lost, you know, he faced them, and he came away. The dog was almost like that. It's not like he had a lot of wins, but it was like, yeah, you see that?

His lung came out that time. He didn't cry or nothing. They just poked it back in and stitched it up. You see that right there? His ear was hanging off. It's just like all kinds of battle wounds like that. It sounds like a brutal place for dogs, your dad's place. Yeah, I always thought the farm was a happier place.

Their little dog like, it's just like where it's like, you know, I showed up at Lamar's farm with a bachelor degree and not picking my poop up. And I left with a PhD in stealing food or like that kind of fucking movie. Yeah, where they show up and they learn even more about how to be ruffians on the outside. Is that what your dad does? Was he a salesman to any professional football

players of dogs? Like a breeder? Anything like that? Yeah, yeah. He used to sell those pit bulls to this guy in Atlanta and made a pretty penny. He was constantly selling them. He needed a lot of dogs. 2004, 2005, it was really picking up.

And then just bottom dropped out out of nowhere. I don't know what happened. Falcons sucked that year too. Weird. Michael Vick was a real sucker. I will never forgive Michael Vick for that shit. I was a big fan of his because he was on the Falcons. And I played Madden at the time, and Vick was the guy in Madden.

You played with Vick on that year on Madden? That was my house. You can't play with the Falcons that year. Everybody's cool. You can never choose the team with the cover player because he's always like 120 stats. So you just get vick and i i'd make my own plays that just didn't even matter because vick's running the ball it doesn't matter what everybody else is doing vick's running the ball and it was just incredible so i was a big

fan of his you know i'm looking into like i was following his brother even i think he was at uh virginia tech uh playing ball and i was like wow these guys are cool and then you find out that not only is he into dogfighting, like a guy who just goes to dogfights, that's kind of a shitty person, period, right? But he is the facilitator, the financier, and the guy with his finger literally on the trigger when it's time to murder the dogs who back away from fights,

who cower at a fight. When it's fight or flight, it's flight. Flight gets murdered by Michael Vick. Drowned by Michael Vick. Shot by Michael Vick. What's interesting was his excuse afterwards. He was like, you know, I'm from a different background than you are, and I didn't know that was bad.

Really? Really? Yeah, like, does it take a course in ethics to know that this is bad? When you had to purchase the dogs illegally and then be very careful in shuttling them into dark cement-floored rooms with a bunch of no-goodniks standing around throwing money, did you not? I thought it was bad like weed is bad, where it's not that bad. And it's kind of illegal.

I didn't have a dog fight at the stadium what's the big deal not that we're doing it in the parking lot yeah that like and the fact that he was the one if i'm hearing this right and i think i've heard this before kyle you seem to know a lot about it he was the one who was killing the dogs themselves and if like he's that much more of a sadist you know because he's clearly like the richest grand poobah top tier guy there. And so if like he really didn't want to be the one murdering dogs, he could

always be like, alright, kill, take this one out and get rid of it. But if he's the one actually doing it, it seems like it's almost an excuse to be a psychopath. Yeah, there's definitely some sort of weird connection to it. Another thing to consider is this, you know, Michael Vick's that guy with that multi-million

dollar contract world famous he's on the cover of the madden game and everything and yet all of the hanger-ons that he had all of these supposed friends cousins whatever acquaintances not one of them was a good enough friend acquaintance or acquaintance to take the rap for him he didn't have a single friend in his crew who could take that little rap for this guy who is world famous. You know what I mean? Well, you know what that says. Well, either maybe he's just so implicated that no one could have taken the rap for him. He may have just been like so completely implicated it was definitely him.

Or maybe he just didn't have a down-ass crew. Exactly. He just showed up to court with like a necklace of dog teeth. No, I think it was that he didn't have a down ass crew and i think that that is because he's an inherently shitty person if michael vick was a cool dude in private to his buddies if he was the kind of guy who like made sure you had christmas money every year if he was the kind of guy who was like if he heard you were missing a car payment he's like well fuck that three hundred dollars that's that's that's sweat you know like like he just doesn't even if he heard you were missing a car payment, he's like, well, fuck that. $300? That's sweat. If he's always looking

out for you and yours, if he's that kind of guy, maybe fostering some goodwill in his communities and stuff, you're like, God, that's Vic. He goes down. The community center doesn't get hams this year. If he goes down, then old Miss Wilson down the street, she doesn't get her light money

because Vic... The pound will be overrun again. Just imagine how many dogs we'll have running around the streets loose. Ever since we voted him senior dog catcher, it's really turned up around here. Honestly, people with dogs are missing them. It's still too good. Serves might have been something like that. Maybe they made him clean dog shit at some point.

But he did time for that, and rightfully so. Fuck him. Did he ever get back and do anything in the NFL again? Yeah, he played for the Eagles and did really well. I think he lost the Super Bowl. Is that right? Or am I thinking of Randall Cunningham? That's good news. I don't remember about the Super Bowl, but I remember he did okay

in Philadelphia. I don't follow the NFL closely, so what was the reception like? Not immediately because of course people were like, fuck this dog murderer, but let's say one season or two seasons down the line. Yeah, I know this because I lived

in the Philly area at the time. So as Philly got him, I think most people in the country were like, fuck that guy. And Philly fans were like, he better be good. And then he was good. And everyone else was like, fuck that guy. And Philly fans were like, he's our guy though.

I'm on Team Vic. He's a son of a bitch, but he's our son of a bitch. Exactly. And then I think even the whole world kind of got over it because he won. And winning breeds popularity. That makes sense. I noticed like I played football growing up in Canada, though, so it doesn't mean anything. When I played football, I was always fascinated by like American football.

like American football. Like if you play football in the USA, you're, you're literally granted carte blanche through everything. Like from like, you know, like as long as you can keep playing, that's the only thing you need to do is still play and play well.

Like, I mean, you know, you've sky of guys like, you know, being charged with murder, like going to the Superbowl and winning. And everyone's like,

the only thing that if you, if you Google it, the only thing that's going to come up is a super bowl ring like winning is getting matters like graduating through high school through university with like out like you know i i read this guy's biography an nfl player who was like after an injury he was like well this sucks because i don't know how to read and i have a university degree but i literally cannot even read so how am i going to get a job? And, you know, you just get like a carte blanche, like through everything. And I always thought that was fascinating about American culture as a Canadian growing up. It's not just football, it's athletics. It's like Michael Scott said, he's like, you know what? My teacher told me that I was going to fail high school. And I went out that night. And I scored more goals.

Than anyone had ever scored in the history of our school. And here I am now. It's just like yeah. He was just good at fucking hockey. That's all it was. Michael Scott was good at hockey. Michael Scott was amazing at hockey. There's a couple episodes where you see him skate.

And he's fucking skating backwards. Like he puts Toby into the boards. He shows up. In the skating thing. That episode. Everybody else does what you're supposed to do. And just brings skates. And he shows up like skating thing that episode everybody else does what you're supposed to do and just bring skates and he shows up in his full hockey there's no puck but he's just he's like doing the stuff he's like clap clap clap clap i have a topic yeah so uh this is only kind of politics but michael pence i guess he tweeted or it came out that he doesn't dine alone with a woman and he doesn't attend an event that serves alcohol

with a woman and the reactions to it were kind of split there are a lot of people that are like who is this fucking quaker and who would live under these ridiculous restrictions? And then there are a lot of other people who are like, yeah, I can see why that would be a thing. And to be honest, I'm kind of on the Pence thing. You're probably on the Pence plan

if you really boil it down. If you told Jackie, hey, I'm going out tonight with this other YouTuber who's a parent. This cute paramotoring chick who's 35. she and I are going to this benefit where they serve alcohol, and there's an open bar, and we'll be sitting here in the front row dressed real snazzy. Yeah. I mean, it's not like a hard no, but it's like a get permission kind of thing. I used to – it wasn't like a frequent thing, but there was a woman that i worked with and uh she left the company and then i went i just met her at lunch

once or twice and jackie was just like like i'm not comfortable with this and you know it's like oh well like you're invited that's not you know you're not wrong like that's not uncommon and like it's it's not it's not something you have to do but like they're clear they're very religious people clearly and they think that it's almost... The way I understood it is like a respect thing of like, all right, you're my one lady, and I'm not going to go out drinking with some other woman, even if it's for work.

I'm going to make sure my professional life stays professional, and that's the way it's going to be. And I don't see a problem with it at all if that's the way they want to live. If that's the way he wants to do it, it's fine. I really thought you guys would be on the other side. No, the angle that – because I just read about it right now real quick. The angle that people were mostly taking is that what he's doing is he's limiting key job opportunities to men only.

Because it's like he won't take a dinner meeting or be alone with a female how could he ever hire her when you know you're interviewing for lots of key roles and he's in a key position to hire if you'll never take a one-on-one with a female nobody does job interviews when you're out drinking at a bar alone like i highly doubt that mike a lot his office is sitting there and one lady comes in and he does like a, oh, forbidden verboten, get out of here. Like, no, like, I just think it means more, hey, I'm not going to go out drinking with someone who's not my wife. Like, it's a respect thing. She prefers it. I prefer it.

That's it. Well, yeah. You shouldn't have to do that. But if they want to, whatever, you know. We should focus on him electrocuting homosexuals because that's a real thing and that actually is repugnant you know like this was just a hot like it's hot news today i hear you yeah yeah i got a side with him and to some regard because i mean look look at what demographic he fits in forget that he's the vice president and a politician all that he's like a 50 60 year old married man who's who's

very religious i'm not shocked that he doesn't go out drinking or like to be in a room alone with another woman in some sort of situation like that. Especially the nature of politics and how things get tossed out there. Oh, these two people were seen entering this room together. You know, all of a sudden there's a conspiracy. If he took it further and said, actually, this isn't me to deal with and not going out to dinner all the women in my office have to wear head coverings so i'm not uh tempted if he did that i would say no you're

not allowed to do that you've gone too far someone might not be it might not be a temptation thing i think just it might be it might just be chivalry. It's not like, oh, can't be around girls. I might fuck them. Sorry. Yeah, good to see you. A bad word right here on BK. It might be like instead like, you know, this is for my wife. Out of respect to my wife, I don't do it.

Yeah. And that's why it's not like and she knows part of it is just okay it's the thing is the the question is is it sexist i like to flip it you know and follow the golden rule that i'll do unto others as they do unto you thing and it's like would i like my wife to have a best friend who's a dude and it's like oh no no with that. Even if she's great, that guy could catch feelings. And now she's in a situation. No, I'd rather her best friends just be girls. But if the person you married was the type of person whose job was like a social and people interacting job, that's the tricky thing.

job you know that's that's that's the tricky thing like if she was an actress and she got a great role you know being with like a hunky dude for three months like you know in next town over or something you know in that position your hands are kind of tied in that sense you know but it's funny you mention that because i feel like that kind of situation is why those marriages fail so often you know like if you want my recipe to make a marriage fail right first of all separate them have them spend six weeks away from each other all the time and then just bombard them with temptation and you'll see a lot of failed marriages I think um like a traveling salesman also has a harder time having a really good marriage because you know they spend nights and

here and there they're just like look it's not like the only reason i'm faithful is a lack of opportunity but god like you you just fling opportunity people like to pretend like the opportunity isn't there and that if someone is married they just somehow don't see it anymore like no we're humans it's like if you put yourself in a position that you're going to be tempted you're more likely going to fail but it's one of those things where like with this at least it's like it's something you establish in a relationship where as they were dating and shit i'm sure this came up it wasn't like boom day one we're married now you play by my rules it was like hey uh that's how i uh mike i don't feel comfortable with you going out and having dinner and drinks with just one other woman it makes me uncomfortable and he says okay I don't feel comfortable with you going out and having dinner and drinks with just one other woman.

It makes me uncomfortable. And he says, okay, I don't feel comfortable with you going out and having drinks with just one guy. It makes me uncomfortable. Are we both cool with this? And they go, all right, cool. And you know what? If he had said or one of them had said, you know what? That's a little puritanical for me.

I don't care for that. They could say, all right, well, that's it for us then. Our relationship isn't going to work out because we have diametrically opposed views on in this regard like it's just like a play it by ear thing if it works for you it works for you if not whatever yeah that's it go ahead no you you you i was there were um i forget what a couple months ago there was a whole big thing uh like with a negative impression of my relationship with Jackie. And I think, man, I was talking about getting permission to go on a trip or something like that. And they thought that was outrageous. That like, why would I ever have to clear something with her first?

And it's like, one, I think that's probably pretty normal in a marriage. And two, I have a really good marriage. Jackie and I get along great. And we've been together for, I think we're coming up on 25 years something like that so uh big gift coming up huh only kind of i want to say it's like 21 years of marriage but like 25 years together and uh anyway uh she doesn't get gifts i'll just i don't know we'll figure something out you know what i I always see around Christmas time, Mercedes does that

ad campaign where you take your wife or your girlfriend outside and there's just a fucking black Mercedes out there with an enormous red bow on it. We're getting a pool. That's a thing. A pool. A Mercedes right next to it.

Kyle, no one likes you. But anyway, yeah, what I was saying with that whole link thing was like hey score's kind of posted right like regardless of whether or not my relationship is the one you want it's the one i want and and it's you know pretty old now so it's working out and um that's how i feel with mike pence you know maybe if you don't like the way he runs his marriage that's's fine. You can run yours differently. But that's – it doesn't matter if I agree with it, but that's always been an important thing in this position. In these positions, how you run your marriage is extremely important, right? You're talking about like vice president?

In politics. In politics. Your sex life, your marriage life is like everyone's business and really important that it's normal. And this is like, you know what this is to me? This looks like it's normal where it's like not only are we so fucking married. Oh, yeah. We're so married. We're so married.

I don't even go to dinner with women. And I think that is sexist. It's a sexist thing because you're basing something on sex and also i think it's some very very obviously closeted homosexual behavior i don't go to women dinner by myself with women like i would be tempted and then it's like good thing i'm gay and now i'm alone alone with Gary. I don't agree. It's funny, but that's not how I see it at all. Nope, nope.

Harley's convinced me. This is the truth now. Oh, I was going to talk about marriage. Their marriage is only interesting to me in relation to how I think their moral character is. I'll talk about Trump, right? If Trump had an open marriage where like they both agreed to see other people or whatever,

and that was the way they ran it, then like that would be okay with me so long as everyone in this relationship is happy. That's a perfect comparison. Right, but what Trump actually did, I don't know about his third marriage. She might've caught onto the pattern before she signed up, but at least the first two left him

because he was fucking other people. and that to me says something about him right he's absolutely stepping out in these marriages and they're not happy about it and uh you know now the kids get split up and all the stuff that happens with divorce so uh trump what terrible lives they must live right yeah but uh yeah i don't know that money doesn't solve every problem but uh i i don't think it's like being a bastard in Game of Thrones if Trump gets a new wife. I bet everybody in Trump's life is just real happy.

If I'm Barron, like Barron Trump has every, Tiffany Trump, like all those kids, they're like oh god, I'm so glad my dad is Donald Trump. At no point is Barron worried that Eric is going to murder him in his sleep so that he retains the air.

Because obviously his mom's not the queen anymore. But I bet Aaron wishes he had two loving parents. But that's pretty Game of Thrones-y. If somebody pushes Baron out of a tower window, we'll know where to look. We will. In Steve Bannon's office. Did you guys see the preview for Season 7 of Game of Thrones they don't give anything away

I was very I didn't want to click it I didn't want to click it but like I'll tell you what nothing is spoiled the spoiler the teaser is called The Walk and it's just Jon Snow

man it's been so long since I've watched Game of Thrones. I'm having a hard time. Daenerys. Daenerys Targaryen and the Evil Queen. What's her name? Cersei. Cersei. And it's just each of them walking.

No White Walkers? Each of them is walking down a hallway to each of their respective thrones. You know, Cersei's down at King's Landing on hers. Daenerys is in Dragonstone. That's the only piece of information respective thrones. You know, Cersei's down at King's Landing on hers. Daenerys is in Dragonstone. That's the only piece of information that's given, is that that must be where she's stopping. That's the seat of her family's power. She's going back there.

And Jon Snow, he's walking up to his chair at the table in the north, you know, where we saw him last. And when Cersei sits down finally at her chair, she goes, and you see her breath, and it's cold. You see it's winter in King's Landing now, and then in the last one second, you have a close-up of a White Walker's

eye, and the way I saw it, and I just watched this thing really quickly before the show started, it didn't look like a White Walker's eye. It looked like that goddamn giant had a white eye. Like eye it looked like that goddamn giant had been had a had a white eye dude it looked like that giant's nose it you see such it's a close-up like this the angle is like i a little nose a little cheek and i don't know that nose to me looked like the giant's nose it was like shit did they remember his name was it it Yar Yar or Mar Mar? Gong Gong or Young Yum or some shit.

They don't know their own name. They're not bright. I'm trying to find a Google images of this because that would be really cool. I like the inclusion of the giant, like that lore kind of shit. No matter what they're doing, it's still neat. They cut so much shit out of it that's in the books,

all the animals above. Like the shadow cats. There's no fucking shadow cats in the show. Yeah, I think maybe some stuff they're just going just gonna save like some stuff might just better be revealed later or something you mean from the cgi budget you know like it might be something that like like they might sit down with george like the producers and they're like yeah so you you you introduce this here what's the plan with that he was might be like, I didn't have a plan for that, but I was thinking it could go here or there because of this.

And they might just be like, oh, wait, it's just better if we connect these. You know, they take their own liberties. They're like looking at the story now, and he's like bawling on television money. He's just like, I don't even remember. Just do it tomorrow. Just know that this person sits on the throne and everyone else is dead there's a scene in the first book i think or you know it's hard to keep everything straight but there's a scene where they're north of the wall john snow and and his

merry band uh and they're on the fist of the first men which sounds like a big hill uh up north the wall that they're all camped out on and one night they get attacked by like the dead men and the white walkers I think but amongst them are zombie bears It's a giant zombie bear that you fucking put a long sword straight through its heart and it fucking kills you That's what it does when you stick a lot That's what happened like like like one brave man runs up and like fights the bear and like they described the fight really well in the book of coordinates like oh he did this and and a parried his paw away and then thrust the blade to the hilt into the icy heart of the beast and then the bear turned up on him and ripped him

in half and all fled and that's how it goes down it's like they're fighting the bear and they realize they don't stand a chance. It's a zombie ice bear that just takes all the damage they can throw at it and then keeps going. That wasn't in the show! And the whole time I'm like, can't wait for those fucking zombie bears to come, man. That's gonna be some hardcore shit. It's never happened.

And I had forgotten how much I wanted zombie animals until right now and they hadn't done it. They'd say she did more with Yum Yum or whatever. The ice spiders, I'm fine with them excluding because we already got Shelob in Lord of the Rings, so I can imagine that. I've had that big spider thing

satiated. But the bears, there was very little bear activity in Lord of the Rings. And it's an underrated fantasy animal. Too many lions, too many eagles. More bears. Everyone's gonna die in this show they may very well die everyone may very well die in in book one there's uh they all they always reference this comet a few times in the first book and it continues i literally expect the end of this show to have a comet smashing into King's Landing.

And maybe like Daenerys and Tyrion are fucking on the back of a dragon. Yeah. They're on the back of a dragon. Maybe that comet, like it passed by in season one, that's its close pass, right? It's coming back around again. It's going to smash right into the King's Landing because we're also invested on who's going to sit on the throne. smash right into the king's landing because we're also invested on who's going to sit on the throne just like we were invested in the starks and their revenge and we were invested in the lattice you get invested in things and it just gets taken away and it's like none of that

matters you idiot look at this you're like okay whoa that was really important but you just killed them all all right fine good thing this is interesting too and it's just going to get to that point where like this meteor is going to smash into King's Landing and we're going to be like, what? And George R.R. Martin's like, you knew what this was? Exactly what this was. Never for a second did we not do that.

Never for a second were you ever happy for a character. Because when they got something, they had like three things taken from them. And like, what do we expect? Like, I know some people just imagine tyrian sitting on the throne and being like i'm the king or or daenerys or john snow whoever you're rooting for it's just

not going to happen you've never once got what you wanted in this show it's not going to happen at the end that's the last place there has to be some kind of resolution yeah no i think that john snow will rule everything because of his heroics and fighting back the White Walkers. How is that happy? What about Tyrion? Why wouldn't he get it? He could be the king's hand or something. But why would he be the king's hand?

He should be the king. Tyrion? How could you choose Jon Snow over Daenerys or Tyrion? He's my favorite. But like, Drew, I'm only playing devil's my favorite. But like, Drew, I'm only playing devil's advocate here. Right,

I'm listening. If Jon Snow is your favorite, like, think about all these people where Tyrion is their favorite, where it's like, they're the royal family, the rest of the Lannisters are dead,

and he never got anything, and he's the smartest one, but a physical handicap set him back. It's like the biggest underdog story. Jon Snow is literally the next in line for the throne, if I understand the heretic. So the Mad King was supposed to be king, right? You can't just kill him and then redo the thing.

But he was the Mad King's whatever. He was in that bloodline because he's a Targaryen. What's it called? Yeah, yeah, i subscribe to that right so that makes john like the most like historically fit to be king even more so than denarius and certainly the lannister kids have no claim at all really all but i thought i thought targaryens were like uh weren't they incestuous as well didn't they keep their bloodline pure yeah that's why the magic that would make john snow like not pure also a debatable like tyrian john seriously because she's incestuous i'm knocking seriously because she doesn't have any parents

that were king no i was saying i was saying daenerys i think daenerys is is in the world of game of thr, just a girl. I understand what both of you are saying. I think what it comes down to is Harley is looking at it from a perspective of this tribe and this tribe and the Lannisters and whoever the fuck else.

But the way it's going to become is it's not going to be oh, I want Jon. Oh no, I want Daenerys. Oh, I want fucking Littlefinger to sneak around and do it. It's going to become is it's not going to be oh i want john oh no i want daenerys oh i want fucking little finger to sneak around and do it like it's going to become quickly it's if as long as the white walkers don't win and the zombies don't conquer us it is a win like it's going to be everyone and like and so john getting it uh daenerys getting it tyrian getting it little finger any of them could be a quote, win, unquote,

because it's not the conquering of mankind. There's enough pieces of the pie for everyone to win, but what's more likely is that everyone loses. But we have to wait until July to find out. I hope Taylor's right in particular, and that these White Walkers start being a major piece of the storyline, because I feel like in six years, they're pretty minor characters. Well, I'd say this.

I'd say this I'd say this like those White Walkers are relentless they'll keep attacking they'll run over each other they'll fall over the wall and just keep running nothing's going to stop them

they're relentless they're like zombies like we've known from every zombie movie are the zombies White Walkers are the blue eyes yeah White Walkers are like right White Walkers are the blue eyes. Yeah, White Walkers are like... Right, White Walkers control like hordes of zombies. They turn people into those White Walker zombies

that are running and they're maniacs. The only way to kill them is with fire or that Valyrian steel or whatever. And they just kept piling up. They were able to fall over the walls and stuff. They're insane. They're going to just start walking into the water and keep walking. I just think they're not all White Walkers.

I think White Walkers refer to the smart human ones. You're absolutely right. The White Walkers have been transformed into White Walkers by those little elf people, whatever their names are. They even show it. He puts that dragonglass blade into the human's chest and creates the first White Walker. They created the White Walker

as a biological weapon against the first white they created the white walker is like a biological yeah i just mean i mean team team white walker and their their their groups their their horde of zombies but like team white walk south and one of these guys fancies himself to be sitting on the throne and daenerys fancies herself sitting on the throne and tyrian i'm sure in the back of his mind and a lot of audience will root that he should be sitting on the throne and Tyrion I'm sure in the back of his mind and a lot of audience will root that he should be sitting on the throne and Jon Snow like embodied embodies like the like hero of the show and so he should sit on the throne and like what are we gonna do like like like you know like like Taylor said you know it's just a win if we survive I really truly believe that I've seen enough zombie things to tell you that you don't win in zombies there's

no winner so i i do subscribe to the taylor mentality that these white walkers are coming they're killing everyone they're gonna kill everything just like we cared about this we cared about that he's gonna take it all away with the white walkers and then what's gonna happen is the white walkers are are going to rule over everything and the only way to stop a zombie apocalypse is to quarantine and nuke and the equivalent of that in this universe is riding the dragon dragons backs and literally burning all of king's landing like i really imagine king's landing overrun by white walkers they torch everything with these dragons and it's just it's dead it's all dead well

at some point what you're gonna have is like the wall like the wall in the north like that's a magical wall we we saw that like that guy had to do some bullshit he at the end of last season um uncle benjen uh comes back into play and he's like i can't go with you to the other side of the wall because it's fucking magic. And we hear about the magic of the wall constantly. It's a big hexed wall. It's magical. So at some point, the White Walker King or whatever is going to fucking show up to the wall, and something is going to happen where they're going to do some magic or something or another is going to happen. They'll sacrifice somebody and put their blood on the wall or something in a handprint and that wall is going to shatter.

That wall is going to fucking explode and fall completely down. Isn't that already figured out? I don't know. If Bran goes below the wall, then suddenly, or maybe Bran already went past the wall and he wasn't supposed to and now there's a problem.

He let everyone get through. I believe Bran's a tree. At this point, he is. What we can appreciate about Now there's a problem. He let everyone get through. I say, I believe Bran's a tree. And I think... At this point, he is. What we can appreciate about Bran... Who did Hodor save? Bran. Bran.

Yeah. I'm sorry to cut you off, Harley. There's a fan theory out there that says that when Bran goes to one side of the wall or the other, I think when he goes back or he already went back or something, and because he crossed it, now everyone can it it's a fan theory i mean but i thought that was like oh that's interesting known to be true see i guess maybe because he got touched by that white walker and it put that like handprint on him and that allowed the white walker to find

him in his like hiding spot when they had the big showdown and Hodor had to give his life. I guess the thought is that that same handprint in some way allows them to either follow him across the wall or makes the wall no good anymore. Weren't they not unable to get into that tunnel system and then he messed up and they were able to get in it again? They didn't know where they were. Is that all it was?

Are you sure there wasn't a magical thing it was just pure hiding no it was because when they were in the uh the dream sequence one of the white walkers touched him and that i guess allowed him to track him basically so when they left that fantasy dream world and they both showed back up the white walker was like i got him on my radar he's fucking due east and so they went east and they found him and that's how they got him so quick after that yeah i'm feeling a little rusty i haven't read about this stuff in like over a year yeah i haven't either so crazy how like i watched the trailer and and it started going and they were walking and i was watching that teaser and as it was going on i'm like nah you know what bitches you don't take like a year and a half off

and think i'm just gonna get hyped because they're walking and sitting on a chair and then she breathes out the like like it's cold in king's landing and i'm like oh winter's coming bring it back call of duty used to do that like their first trailers would suck so hard and we we'd analyze it frame by frame to see the differences, and it's not multiplayer. Yeah, somehow they got us hooked in. I don't know. I'm kind of mad at TV this year. So Walking Dead is a show I'm really into, and the Walking Dead fan base in general is at maximum fuss right now.

They've spent a whole season, walking dead by the way has 16 shows there's like you said it was good again i did and i'm taking it back a little bit like they do a binary system so they have eight shows in the first half of the season eight shows in the second half of the season and we're 15 shows out of 16 shown so far at the end of last season they introduced us to the big baddie that's going to be our problem this year. Yeah, I know. I'm caught up on the show to that point. And then the first two episodes of this season.

But outside of that, I've only read. And I've read quite a bit about this current bad guy. But you continued to the point that you were making because I'm curious. The point is everyone's been hoping this season would have like five episodes of massive like town on town conflict and it appears i don't know what's going to be the finale but it appears that the entire year is just going to be sort of set up and backstory you know preparing to battle the bad guy and a whole year with no payoff that's a lot is this season seven it is i'll tell you i as like when when like they introduced you know the big baddie this past season like something i had read a whole bunch it was oh it was incredible television in fact that scene was one of my favorite scenes reading

the book so i watched last season's finale because i thought that was gonna go down and it did it and I was like with my buddies like oh you guys just wait and they got me I love the double reveal was a very smart move it was so genius and then I watched the next episode and I was like nah I'm off the show again I'll read it when I read it. And I did say to my buddy, it's a long time, this section of the show. It's like you get kind of like, I don't know, you get greedy or impatient, especially in the show like Walking Dead

where the good parts are only really good parts because you had such terrible long parts before that really make you feel like you're part of the journey. Yeah. Like you were there. So there's an excellent payoff. Through all the boring times. Yeah. Then you get to like now and it's just like,

it's like, you know, to 10 episodes of Dragon Ball, you watch him charge a spirit bomb, you know, for him to shoot it on the last episode. You know what I mean? And, you know, uh, to 10 episodes of Dragon Ball, you watch him charge a spirit bomb, you know, for him to shoot it on the last episode. You know what I mean? And you know,

then he misses. I am. I think I'm, I think I'm caught up on the, uh, on the comic book. Like if I'm, the comic book is probably three years ahead of the show right now.

And I've read it all. So I feel like I know what's happening, what's going to happen if they stick to it. And, um, man, I, i've read it all so i feel like i know what's happening what's gonna happen if they stick to it and um man i i just don't remember it taking this long for rick to sort of assemble partners wait is this is this story still being written or is this based on like an older comic it's apparently never gonna stop being written yeah they're comparing it to star wars we're like making too much money i bet 50 years from now they think it'll keep going. When the book, when the comic started,

the first page basically says, like, there is no real end to this. We're just, you're going to watch humans grow and change and experience what this is. And it's not about finding a cure. And it's not about that. It's literally about survival and family and friends and people and how people will be and i

remember reading that like years ago and then you know the the scariest thing that always happened in walking dead is never to turn the corner and your characters see a horde of zombies it was for like your characters to turn the corner and see like just a human being being like wait don't hurt me yeah it's thing in walking dead just one other human or two people or god forbid one of them has a weapon or just like a weird look on his face you're like oh someone acting bizarre you know that guy who's who's there looking way too clean what's you know he's or that or that guy who's just like hi how are you he's way too friendly like like wait doesn't he exist in here with us like like we haven't met a friendly salesman type person in fucking eight years.

And this guy's like, hi. Here's the thing. So the show is like seven years in. But I think in real life, it's been like three years, something like that. And now the dynamic is like, dude, if you're still alive, we know you've done fucked up stuff. We've all done fucked up stuff, right? The only people alive now are people who've killed other humans, people who've killed tons of zombies,

people who've made decisions that they regret. And that's like a thing. When they think about introducing them to their group, they're like, all right, how many walkers have you killed? How many people have you killed? And there's another question too. Maybe it's why did you kill them or something like that. It could be. It's like how many walkers have you killed? How many people have you killed? And there's another question too. Maybe it's why did you kill them? Or something like that.

It's like how many walkers? And the answer you want is too many to count. It's like how many people have you killed? And the answer you want is like two. And it's like why? And they're like they murdered my family and they were eating my left arm and I just couldn't take it anymore.

And you like how that is they were my family too and they eat billy's arm and billy's like yeah yeah it's like asking a chick how many people they've slept with where like they want to answer kind of honestly but not really honestly would be like how many seven like saying it like trying to gauge your reaction i meant five they met a priest is that cool and this priest this priest was supposed to be like the perfect guy right he's all good and you know they're like yeah how many people have you killed i have never killed any people have you done this and they're like how did you stay alive and he's like well whatever it turns out what he did is he held himself up in like a church locked all the doors when like humans knocked on it looking for

sanctuary he just kept them locked pretended no one was home. And he ate. They did a food drive or something. And he ate all the food intended for the community by himself to stay alive, held up in the church. And they're carving on the outside, you'll burn in hell for what you've done to us. Because they're like, yeah, yeah. Because he's their leader.

He's their pastor. This is a community. And it's small. They know that man in there. That is their preacher. They know that man in there. That is their preacher. They know he has food and shelter. He's just going to sit there and sob and listen to them. They all got eaten out there.

Eaten alive. He's supposed to be the good guy. He wears the collar and everything. He keeps wearing that collar. I don't care for that character. Let me do an average. It seems time. Go ahead.

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Yeah, absolutely. It's super easy to build one with them. You don't need anybody. No coding. You don't need to be a Woody's Gamer Tag type professional to make things happen. You just get it done and get to making money with your business. Did you see this? So I saw there's two little things that I linked over here.

I don't know if they're full topics, but apparently a pretty big section of I-85 in Atlanta just collapsed because of a fire. It doesn't look like anybody's hurt. Collapsed. Like I drive right fucking through there. That's pretty crazy. It's a big fire. And then above I saw these fucking trashy excuses for humanity.

It's these mug shots. And it says Maloney uh salinit uh guilty of getting husband to shoot neighbor for telepathically raping her telepathically raping her and i'm gonna tell you right now i wouldn't fuck her with your mind she is in fairness though if you're being telepathically raped i think that they've responded appropriately with With bullets? I mean, if you're being telepathically raped, I mean, I feel like telepath, telepathy involves some movement, right? Like, it's not as if it's... No, it literally doesn't.

I'm thinking telekinesis. See, a telekinesis rape... She was not telekinetically raped. That was where she was, like, in the air, suspended, and all of a sudden a dildo floated out of the room, and she's like, no, no, no. And the guy was like, oh, yes. He's like Professor X over there.

And the dildo was just- Fair game. I mixed up my telepathy and telekinesis. I do that from time to time. I got to say the funniest comment is the second top comment is, wow, she's fucked in the head. That's great youtube comments are either like there's such a big dichotomy it seems where it's either total trash and just mean-spirited or legitimately funny and really offensive shit that these are reddit comments oh that's reddit these are reddit comments and whenever i look at a video or a picture on reddit it's so funny every time when i'm looking at them i'll look at something i'm

like i don't understand this i should go to the comments and i'll go to the comments and it's all like dumb like cuck jokes and stuff like that and i'm like okay those are hilarious but i really want to know what's going on and other times i'll see something that's hilarious i'm like oh that's so funny and i'll go to the comments just to be like, who else has got something for this? And I'll get like a, well, actually, on the other hand, I'm like, come on. Like it's never the vibe of comments that I want when I get in there. I completely agree with that because when I go to the comments, I'm usually looking for backstory. Someone to be like, actually, the original video is posted here and you get the full context when you watch it or even better and i fucking love this is if like it's i don't know we're talking

about deep sea environments or something something technical something scientific where like the average person just doesn't have that know-how and then like a biologist or uh an engineer of some kind like comes on gives you his references first. He's like, well, you know, I did this, did that. I was on the team that built it. Here's how it works. You're like, all right, let me fucking read this. Cause this guy knows exactly what the fuck he's talking about. He is not your average Reddit commenter. And then of course you get like celebrities who will post on Reddit comments. You'll, you'll have some guy. Uh, I remember there was this guy, he's like, I'm six foot four, six foot five six foot five 120 pounds and like i fell down in the gym and they laughed at me and it was so i was so ashamed that i don't know if i can go back i think i'm just giving up on this i'm gonna be like this weird

looking guy forever and arnold schwarzenegger replies he's like he's and it's just a paragraph of fucking inspiration he's he's like those guys are fucking cowards you're the one who like marched your way in there and like did this thing he's like it's easy for them it's easy for them to do that you walked into their house and you did this and that and yeah you failed but you're gonna try it you're gonna get up and you're gonna be stronger and you're gonna succeed and you're gonna win and you're gonna fucking made and don't do that like really pump this guy up and but he should have given him a little reality dose at the end, too. After all the pump-up, he could have been like, but then also remember,

sometimes it's just funny when people fall. So maybe they were just laughing in a happy way. You know, at the end of the day, if I'm in a cafeteria somewhere and some old lady slips and just falls or something, I will end of the day, if I'm in a cafeteria somewhere and some old lady, like, slips and just falls or something, like, I will laugh. Not like, ha-ha, bitch.

Like, ha-ha, you have fallen the way I would fall. And people would laugh at me and I'd go, man, I appear quite the goober right now, don't I? And then you stand up and you keep moving. I can understand the gym, though. I can understand the gym though. I've dedicated a lot of, of like my, my brain power to things being like,

to things being like as weird as it sounds to make me sound a little crazy, but I've been like, you know, God forbid I should ever find myself in the scenario where an old woman is getting robbed. I should defend her. Yeah. God forbid I'm ever in a situation where someone is being completely racist to someone else. I should stand up for that person.

If someone should slip and fall down the stairs, I should ask if they're okay before I laugh. Like I consciously like there are things and I'll never forget. It was me and my, my, a good friend of mine. And we were in like the 11th grade. And this is why I've been like, I should control my laugh. They say you could tell a lot about a person from what they laugh at. And I was like, well, I should be careful about what I laugh at then. Because I laugh at everything.

And I was with this buddy of mine. And it was back in the day. We were blazing. And we're in the day we were blazing and uh we're in the backyard and it was at my buddy's house not the one that i was with in the backyard just another buddy and he wasn't there and he'd been acting really weird lately like something was going on maybe something was wrong with him mentally he was changing and i think it was maybe on account of being young and blazing i I remember reading about it back in the day.

I'm not sure how it turned out. But me and my friend were there in the backyard and we're passing it and, you know, we're there. And I guess his mom came home early. And I guess the stress of her kid and all this and everything that was going on, she opened up the back door and, you know, it's right there. It's in our hand and she's got tears running down her face. And she was like do

this anywhere do this anywhere you want i don't care just stop doing it here stop doing it around my family and i was like like i like you know i respect this woman and i still do and i was just like oh damn like this is serious and i slowly turned to my buddy who was next to me who is also happens to be one of the funniest looking friends i have and like so i'm like 15 and i'm like oh no and i turn and i look at him and i get like this from him oh like you know he's like he was trying to hold his laughing but couldn't at all and he was like oh dead dead and i we're just laughing and i'm laughing and she's crying and i feel horrible and i'm like if my mom knew i would be such shit for this and i can't stop laughing and she's looking at me like are these idiots

these idiots are they serious right now like she's a joint she knows what's up no like there was no control and i remember after that being like god forbid i should ever find myself in some scenario where i laugh and i don't want to i My friend, he connected me on this show once with actually Norm MacDonald and Tom Green. And I think Norm MacDonald is one of the funniest guys ever. I think his delivery is the best. He's one of my favorite comedians. And I got to ask him any question. And I asked him, like, oh, what kind of movies do you have coming out in the future?

And he went on this future? And he, he went on this thing and he was making jokes each time. And he goes, he was like, well, we were going to do this movie, but, uh,

well, this happened and it was a funny joke. And he was like, and this movie was considered. And then that was, that happened. And that was a funny joke. Then he was like,

and then we were going to do, uh, we thought about doing dirty work too, but Chris Farley's dead. And like stared at the camera. I laughed. I was like, I burst out laughing. And then I was like, ooh. And my buddy was there with me too.

And it was like on Skype. So he saw me laugh and I laughed. And I was going to be like, was that, were you trying to be funny? Should I apologize? Was that you? Was it not? so instead i was just like oh and yeah so anyways controlling what i laugh at is always it's something that like you know for the past like eight years i was at a funeral i was at my grandmother's funeral nightmare a nightmare and this is not a go i wasn't very close with this grandmother like i had two and one i spent weekends with from from an early time in my life and like like christmas and everything and the other it's not so much

it's an old lady i know right your mom's grandmother my dad's mother that i wasn't close with my mom's mother very close with her like like spent every weekend with her growing up love that she's the arnold schwarzenegger fan who got me into like r-rated movies when i'm six years old and like like made me love movies um the other grandma is she's just the lady who gives me a 20 every christmas right like like don't care about that lady at all i'm at at her funeral. She died at like 65 or 70 or something like that. I'm 14, 15. No, I'm 16 because I drove there. I drove to the funeral. And I just remember like driving in there and listening to country music. And I can't think of who sings the song, but maybe Merle Haggard. But it's this song called Rose Colored Glasses. And the context, the concept of Rose Colored Glasses is is that when you it's a it's

a sense of mind it's that you look at things with with a different slant on them always to look at a good light you know but i get in there and i go to look at my grandma and she's wearing fucking rose-colored glasses and and like one of her like female relatives who was like running the show you know she's like she was the one who had suggested what granny was gonna wear in the casket or whatever the fuck like anybody cares she's like them was granny's rose colored glasses she loved her rose and all i can hear is fucking merle haggard and rose colored glasses that hide all the truth and i'm just like the laughter is just boiling boiling in my head like i'm a kettle pot that needs to like just needs to let off steam and i'm just i had to

pretend like i was crying and get the fuck out of there they were like oh man kyle's real kyle's real beaten up over this whole thing he's taking it hard and i'm outside just like i can't believe the fucking rose-colored glasses of that dead lady you should you should totally be able to laugh openly at funerals like that's something i think our culture isn't as good at at a lot of like you see like mexican funerals maybe i'm making this up but there are some latin american funerals where like it's just a giant party and everybody's like, sometimes they're marching the body around or something. Maybe tamp it back a bit. Still have them in a box, but still have a huge party.

They break him out and put some shades on him. I want my funeral to people to be like, oh man, he promised to be a dope party when he died. I'm going. I want people to have fun. Because that's going to be the real last memory of you. When they think of you after that moment, it won't be you alive first. It'll be that splash

of you dead because they have to register that and then they'll think about the funeral for a sec. You don't want it to be a somber memory of, oh, I remember how fucking sad Aunt Susan was. You want it to be like, goddamn, Uncle Joey got so drunk, he tried to open the casket back up or something like that

like that's what i would want you know they're fucked man i don't i don't i don't like you nobody does i don't think they're necessary to say goodbye to the person i i think like especially if you saw them recently before they died like i i i've gotten nothing out of any of the funerals i've went to other than like an itchy neck you know from the from the shirt um I just I just don't care for it uh it's a sad time everybody's just sort of I see lots of people crying and you know I find hypocrisy in their tears it's like you didn't know him you know or whatever the fuck it's just I've never been to a funeral that I thought I got anything out of and I always like you know you go to to, if I'm being honest, I feel like most people go to like save face for themselves.

It has so little to do with going there and celebrating this person's life, saying goodbye to them. It's like, oh, if I don't go, Aunt Susan will see me or see that I'm not there. I think that most people are motivated by that when they go to a funeral. Well, I don't know if it's like that for you guys,

but Jewish funerals, there's like a book to sign in yeah yeah there's a there's a sign-in book that's like yeah like taking attendance attendance you're like literally proving you were there i've been to three funerals and uh i like them all actually it was just kind of a little closure for me it wasn't like i had a good time i'm sorry i'm sorry no it's. It's just it was like, all right, you know, like, okay. I've seen them dead. And it's not that I doubted everyone. But now I know, no. Like, you know, I see the dead body there.

And, yeah, like there was two of them I think there was a viewing. And one of them was just a memorial with like a picture. And it gave me a chance to think about them one last time and sort of close up shop in my head and put that person to rest. That's what I did there. One last thing. You talk about the other people and stuff. When I attend a funeral, it's pretty much mostly about me. I may make a quick observation of their

closest people like their husbands or wives or something and try to offer some sort of support. But mostly I'm just there to close my own book on it. the thing that creeps me out like the thought process is like i that's crazy you've only been to three funerals i've been to way more than three funerals okay but when i go to a funeral like it's all like the bad vibe not bad vibe but the sad vibe and then what i always remember is like the last thought i have

as i'm like looking to leave and thinking what I'm going to do next and like when I'm always in the middle of that thought at funerals of like oh I'm gonna head to Chipotle and then I'm gonna go take care of this and do that and go home or I'm gonna I gotta go take care of this for work or something like that I always get stopped in that thought at funerals because I'm like holy shit like this is like this is exactly what people will be doing at my funeral they're gonna be sad for a bit but they've still got a fucking day to take care of. And so it's just a weird juxtaposition of how somber it is. And then everyone there is having thoughts that are just benign and normal.

Like, oh, I should get a burrito after this. In high school, I went to my friend John Scott's funeral. And he had died in a car crash. And it was a closed casket funeral because it had been a terrible, terrible car crash. He was going hundreds, well over 100 miles an hour and had hit a tree and he wasn't wearing a goddamn seatbelt because it was malfunctioning.

So it was just, it was awful. There I was, you know, it's me and my friends and we're his friends and, you know, people from the high school are there, his age or they were all 16 or 17, 18, whatever. And then there his parents are. I fucking know them. And, you know, they're just melting.

You know, it's the – neither one of them – they can both barely stand. You know, there are people fucking propping them up because their son who was about to go to prom, about to graduate high school, about to go be like a state – not just compete at a state school. He was going to be a national competitor in his sport of choice, which was the pole vault. He was an excellent pole vault. He's like 6'4", real lanky guy, but real strong at the same time. He's just gone, and I just remember, God, this is devastating. I don't want to be here and even feel this.

I don't want to be adjacent to their pain. It's so real. It's hard. I went to a funeral for a classmate of mine. I guess he died when we were, I guess he died when we were like 13 or so. He had a brain tumor and in like sixth grade or so, we went to the same school in grade school and then he went to a different middle school.

But in sixth grade or so is when he just, you know, he couldn't keep coming to school and the teacher had to be like, you know, Ryan's not coming back. Um, his illness has gotten worse and it was more of like, okay, like, but we're 12, whatever. keep coming to school and the teacher had to be like you know ryan's not coming back um his illness has gotten worse and it was more of like okay like but we're 12 whatever i'll play with my little eraser man on my desk like this is not a real thing you know you don't really get it at all

and then even like 13 like a year and a half later going when he died like seeing his parents seeing his older sister like i don't know that that might have been one of the aside from like family members i think that was my first non-family member funeral i ever went to and it was just heartbreaking being like oh fuck like this i i talked to this guy like i knew this guy and he's my age and he's dead and i haven't even i've barely got through puberty at 13 you know there were a bunch of kids who died when i was growing up. There was a girl who, the way I remember it when I was maybe 10th grade or something like that, another student my age, their mother was driving them home from school or something like that and they had a car accident and the mother and her sister died. And it's like, oh, well now that's the funeral we've got to go to. It's her mother and her sister are dead. And she was grievously wounded.

She had a big scar on her face now. You know, like that shit's harsh. That's just hard to deal with when you're 14 years old. So when I was in high school, it was my first two years in high school. For you non-Americans, high school is four years long. You go from like 14 to 18. Anyway, so it was early in my high school and there was a car crash involving like the most popular kids these were the kids that all the other kids wish they were and uh one of them was

hurt and like they had to like relearn to walk or something and one of them died and what was funny is that like the coolest kids were mourning the most because they were close to them and then there were other kids who were almost like north korean fakers like oh what was the crying contest were there any kids who knew they were about to escalate a spot in the social hierarchy right that was it it was like oh i cared way more about chris and i were like this the whole time dude you know this is really hurting me hard it's like it was not. Chris never hung out with you. You're a nerd. And like that whole dynamic existed.

Also, get Chris's patch. Yeah, so. I still remember that dude, he was like probably the first person in my life I ever had like actual conversations about Lord of the Rings with because it came out like when we were in sixth or sixth grade i guess when we were 12 maybe fifth grade it came out the movie first one did the movie yeah my mistake and i remember

he was like one of the few people at that age group who had like got so into it like me that they were like reading the book ahead of time and so he was like the one person i could talk to and even remembering that right now like it's so's so sad. Just thinking, like, like, just little things like that. You're thinking, like, this is an interest that I still have a whole lifetime of his after the event. You know, because it's been,

I've lived as long without him alive as... Since then. Every day that you've lived, he's never got. You know, it's fucked that our lives are so short and our existences are so fucking fickle

and meaningless. Like, I think that the next stage of human evolution that's actually important the most important next stage is that we fucking get our brains digitalized and copied over so that we can become we can never die so that we can never die because once we do that like the one of the big things that helped humanity become that you know spearchucking thing that looks down at every other animal is that we started being able to speak to each other. And write it down. And that was the next step.

At first, we'd all sing songs to remind us not to drink dirty water, right? There was the Dirt Water song. And there was the Don't Eat Maggots song. And there was the Clean Your Wounds song. That there was the clean your wounds song yeah that's how you kind of kept up with a tradition of information there were songs and stuff and like been spoken word and stuff like that and then we started writing that shit down and and ever since we've just been getting exponentially better and better at what we do i mean in the last hundred years look at what we've accomplished that you've got people whose lifetimes span the uh the distance

between the Wright brothers and Neil Armstrong, right? Like, that's unfathomable, incredibly quick to go from there to there. So it's certainly not out of the realm of possibility to think that your children, I'm not going to fucking have any, might be able to digitalize their brains and live on forever.

Speaking of the monkey thing, I wonder if, or like, what we evolved from, like, 100,000 years ago or whatever, the first one to wipe their ass, I bet they got mocked at first. The first couple of them to wipe their ass after shit.

Maybe, but I guarantee that people were law-de-dying them at the time. Like playing like, there's a clean ass over there. Oh, goodness. Get on the rear end, huh huh look at him with those leaves and he's just sitting there to stand selling leaves to wipe your ass

and they're like it's never gonna take off you know fucking I think it was I imagine it more so like oh you shit and then you go in the water you shit and then you go in the water if You shit and then you go in the water. If you don't do that, then you get bugs in your butt and you die. That's also a way that you get

dirty water. I was going to say that it's the first guy that uses toilet paper. They were probably like that's not enough, dude. That's a good point. Do you think they had like a... Bugs shit on that leaf. like yeah that's all that's a good point yeah do you think they had like uh the bugs

bugs shit on that leaf you're wiping your shit away with like a bug shit pad we still say that like as far as i'm concerned if you're cleaning your butt with just toilet paper and you're not breaking out the wet wipes or the bidet you gotta get next level baby you want to hear my james bond ass wiping story when i mcgyver more like i had to come up with some toilet paper in a field once You gotta get next level, baby. You wanna hear my James Bond ass-wiping story? MacGyver, more like. I had to come up with some toilet paper in a field once. Socks and underwear always work, right? You can go to that if you have to.

It's been days since that's happened to me. What I had was notebook paper. What I had was notebook paper. Like standard fucking notebook paper. Not ideal. Like wine paper. Let me tell you how to make toilet paper out of notebook paper. You crumple it into a ball, then you just flatten it out.

And then you repeat the process about 25 or 30 times, and it becomes soft like cloth. It becomes as soft as toilet paper. I swear to God, like do this. You got a piece of paper somewhere? You're listening to this? Crumple it up and flatten it out 25 times in a row. I use the three shell method.

Three seashells? Where you grab the other two and you pinch the shit and pull it out. Is that Demolition Man? That's Demolition Man. Harley, what have you been up to lately? Flying around the world, spreading the brand and the seed, I assume.

Spreading the seed. Mostly. Yeah, I mean. Into tissues around Europe. Oh, yeah, Europe trip. Tell us about that. Yeah, I went to Italy. I went to Italy, which was interesting. What's that? I coughed. What did you say before I went to Italy. I went to Italy. Um, which was interesting.

What's that? I coughed. You went, what'd you say before you went to Italy? Oh, uh, I spread my seat. Anyway, carry on. I, sorry. So you went to Italy. It's so funny.

These, whenever I come back on, it's always like, like, uh, like an amount of time apart that it's close enough that I'm like, did i talk about these projects or did i not mention that or how long but um yeah i went to italy with pagani the car company and that was cool because they were like they they brought youtubers down from like every country to like from all these different countries to like represent and we were we went down for the usa you're the job yeah the job came through and everything and i was just like i'm not gonna i'm not gonna tell them that i'm canadian i'm north american motherfucker i was like there's we got enough like like usa is our number one demo anyways i'm like so that

should be enough right um and uh yeah that was trippy that was cool we went to italy and it was uh i was in bologna so it's not like a like a touristy area so it was just like kind of weird it was like just like really really italian like uh they just thought i was an idiot because to them you know i'm american and like that's just all that was an idiot because to them, you know, I'm American. And, like, that's just all that was to them. So they weren't really the nicest people in this town. I'm sure I came off as, like, a loud idiot also. But it was cool because I got to see a two and a half million euro car get unveiled live.

And eat some real Italian food. But that was exhausting. Coming back home was good because the grind is just endless. I find in this industry you could put a thousand lines in the water and maybe one or two of them will bite, but you've still got to be putting lines in the water. So right now we're doing a a scripted tv show with cbc that we sold and uh i have a youtube red show but i don't know what youtube's doing

oh i don't even know if i could say that no one's saying anything about i think the audio nobody will tell yes don. Don't worry. Yeah, so we had that show, and we produced a pilot with them. And Epic Meal Time, Tuesdays, Handlets on Fridays. And I like to go live. I love live. I think live is so awesome. So I try and do live whenever I can.

And that's usually when we're ahead by a bunch of Epic Meal episodes. Then we'll do a live one. Don't you guys just go in live for phone apps or anything? I wonder if you could do that. What? I don't know. With Facebook, you could just sort of turn on your phone and go live. Yeah, on Facebook, you just go and boom, you're live on Facebook.

Yeah. You could do it with Instagram. Instagram also. YouTube should do that. You can do it with Instagram. Instagram also. YouTube should do that. You can do a Periscope. Periscope. I'd love to just turn my phone towards me and fly somewhere and think if people could join or not join. Up to them.

You said you've had a legit viral video where you go live and you're like, everyone, we're live here at 3000. Yeah. Harley, is it really hard for you now that you, because you said you've been to Italy and had real authentic Italian food. Like when you go somewhere now and there's a big group of people like,

oh, we got to go to Fazzino's. It's the fucking best. Like, are you biting your tongue the whole time just wanting to be like, this isn't real fucking Italian food. Like I had the experience because a lot of people are like that when they get back from Europe.

They're very food dickish all of a sudden. Well, if you think about me, I'm probably the least food dickish guy because I was the guy that put a taco on a pizza, and I was like, even this is cooking. So it's not like I can ever hold my opinion on food in a high regard or anything. I've definitely made myself the pharaoh of lowbrow food like like corn i've like you know approached corn dogs as a gourmet ingredient so i i would never want to be the guy that's like no this is an italian did you think it was that good

in italy their food is there you know like it's it was great food. But where I was, it was a very pasta-based town. Like they don't even go hard on pizza. Like pizza wasn't a big deal where I was. It was all about pasta. And I had these like creamy meals. And this was the only thing that I would say the difference between, you know, this Italian pasta versus like a good italian dish in the usa um is they were both delicious they were both good but when it was done eating eating pasta in the usa i feel fat and gross later

i feel i made a bad decision i pigged out and I ate something that's not healthy. When I had the same meals that tasted just the same and looked like they were oily and creamy, when I ate it, I didn't have that feeling. It wasn't so much the initial taste going in. It's just whatever the hell your country does to make it taste that way. Kudos, because it tastes really good but there's there's other sciences going on here that don't take place in italy with their pasta and food that it just it felt clean and that's the one thing is i was i was eating like bread garlic bread and pasta you go to like olive garden eat garlic bread and pasta like you will not feel good later. Like, you will not.

And I don't mean, like, you'll have bad, like, stomach ache or you'll, like, you'll have the runs. Like, no, you're just going to be like, wow, I'm fat, and that was gross. My body feels gross. My titties shake. I'm a little heavier. I'm a little weighed down by this. Yeah, exactly.

You're admitting defeat the day you eat there. Yeah. I love Olive Garden. Fuck that. I go in there once a eat there. I love Olive Garden. Fuck that. I go in there once a month. I fucking love Olive Garden. I love Olive Garden too. I love Olive Garden too.

I'm just saying. If you could have an all you can eat sit down real Italian you would leave Olive Garden and just not feel so gross you won't won't take that like buttery nap that you take they let you draw on the placemat with crayons in real italy i don't know today they do have oh you gotta grade the box of crabs for you you draw all over the place will it make your pasta just like a mama used to draw all over the place with a Mickey Pasta just like a mama used to draw all over the fucking ice, man. My favorite thing to do

when I travel, like, you know, I've been to Japan, I've been to Italy, I've been to, you know, Ireland. What I like to do is I like to try the things that I know. Like, as crazy as it sounds, like, I like to try the McDonald's. Like, I've had McDonald's in

Japan, Italy, Israel. Like I want to have those McDonald's just because it's like I know what to expect. So something like seeing the cultural differences that like a brand is interesting to me. Like when I saw 7-Eleven in japan i very badly wanted to go inside i wanted to see what's in the aisles there that's that's what that's what will be weird to me because it's not like i can go into any store but like oh it's weird look how old of course it's weird it's japanese but you go into a 7-eleven now it's like here's japan's best impression of a 7-eleven like an american chain and so i'm at 7-eleven and i'm getting like sushi at the 7-elevenven, like an American chain. And so I'm at that 7-Eleven and I'm getting like sushi at

the 7-Eleven in Japan just because I'm interested in it. So when I was in Italy, like, you know, I went to McDonald's and it's like, oh man, they have curly curly fries at their McDonald's which I just thought was like an interesting little difference. You know? You have to order by robot there

too. Oh no! Oh, she died! Wait, what is this? Woody sent me a link and I'm like, oh, that's funny. Look at that. I don't know why you're laughing. Oh man, I didn't know that. You guys ever go to

Live Link? Oh yeah. What is the context of this video? All I know is that what is the context of this video? This person just fell off. All I know is that this is the maid. And for some reason, this woman's filming the maid as she hangs from the window. And rather than... That bitch is doing windows from the outside.

And she doesn't help her. Right? She just watches. I think the woman's screaming for help, and I can't read lips. And she sort of backs off. I need the comments section, Woody. I need the comments. Yeah.

What in God's name is happening here? Alright, let me just say, this is fucked in a half. At first, I was like, I thought for sure this was one of those YouTuber videos where you think somebody's dangling on the side of something and then they flip the camera 180 degrees. Yeah, I was just watching that recently, too. On the sidewalk or

something like that. But when the lady's holding on by her fingertips and then she falls and then the camera approaches the railing holding on by her fingertips, and then she falls, and then the camera approaches the railing or whatever, the window, and looks downward to see where she went. And I totally expect cushions six feet below, or even inches below. She falls three, four stories,

and it hits some shit. Seven, thank you. And when she hits, there's a... She lives. There's like a billow of smoke on this here let me jump in the top comment is this woman gets arrested and made survives with minor injuries she survived it's and the comment here says shitty flexible aluminum saved her no die agree yeah wait so the the woman who was filming her got arrested for this event yeah that's the seinfeld law that's the good samaritan law bitch should have helped out a hundred percent a hundred a hundred percent that woman gets

arrested like imagine you just need you just need a little help and all they do is they're just like i'd love the audio just like on science look at her she's trying to get back look i'm putting this on Facebook. I'd like to get the audio. I want to understand how the maid got in that predicament. Because she's hanging by one hand. Do you know the story? Well, apparently that's her way of firing her from what I'm reading from this other thing.

Dude, it's on LiveLeak with audio. I was just saying, do you guys go there? Oh, LiveLeak's a lot of fun. We're LiveLeak veterans. It's like Russian world star hip-hop. Do you guys go to r slash watch people die? Yes, watch people fucking die is better. Whoa!

No! Oh, she hit hard! She hit hard. I'm glad she lived. I'm glad she lived, too. Jesus Christ. Wowzer. That is a bad fall.

One, two, three, boom. I like how we had a long conversation and Harley gave a nice monologue about, you know, I'm really being careful about what I laugh at and when I laugh at it because it's kind of discerning about your character. Kyle only started laughing at that after it had been confirmed that the woman could be dead. I'm just going to put that out there,

that it was only when she felt stories and her body hit like a sack of potatoes on that metal shed that kyle was uproariously laughing saying oh i thought there'd be a pillow but now this is even there's more because kyle was absolutely offended by the idea that people would look at naked pictures of emma watson right he just like how dare you this is not not funny, right? I saw X-Men, goddammit. I've never seen this bitch before in a day of my life. I really don't understand your moral code. It doesn't make any sense to me.

That is true. The thing that makes it funniest is that the clip starts with her one hand there. And so you know that you're already on chapter four of this ten-chapter story. And most chapters are falling. It's just not going to work. What was she doing to be hanging off there? It almost makes you wonder if she was doing something shitty and they got in a fight.

It looks so weird. Let me jump in. The woman who's filming, oh, the maid is screaming, hold me, hold me, And then the woman filming says, may you learn your lesson. Whoa! Did she upload it to Facebook? Where did this occur?

Did she upload it to Facebook? Where did this occur? I don't know that yet. I wonder if it's on... Is it in the live link? Does it describe it? If you're listening and you're hesitant about watching this Maybe

the punchline doesn't hit as hard now that you've heard us say that she's falling out of goddamn Windows 7 stores That was hilarious She hits in the fetal position and it's a real BOOM! And dust flies up when she fucking it appears to be a foreign maid in an arab state yeah it was an arab state like the the video you don't

see after this is where she was stoned to death for uh ruining someone's gardening shed and she also didn't have her face covered in public and that is actually public down there now so yeah on the way down someone got an upturt and so they had they had to honor kill her immediately oh my god yeah this is uh so that we may honor kill her what a piece of shit sociopath like what do you what kind of awful person do you have to be to watch somebody dangling there and go may you you learn your lesson. This person watches Ramsey Bolton scenes where he's playing Theon and is like, I see no issue with this.

He has been defiant in face of authority or like whatever the fuck he would say. Really, Jamie Lannister is a better comparison. Jamie Lannister? How? Yes. He pushed someone out a window. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. He actually really did it. Okay, that's a good... Except people were way sadder about Bran than this poor lady. Nobody seems to mind. I was broken up about Bran. First of all, this lady lived.

Second of all, she's famous now, right? She'll probably get some sponsorship deals out of this now. She'll be on... What would this lady now be a good spokesman for? Maybe those blade feet that you run with? No, it'd be a

Windex product that lets you... It's like a bendable arm that lets you clean windows from the inside. And it's just... It's like, wonder how I got here? Because I didn't shop it for Windex. And then just fall, like pause. And it's like, wonder how I got here. Cause I didn't shop it for wind decks. And then, and then just fall and bunk.

What are she sold? Like trampolines. There is one brand. Yeah. So solid. And the noise it makes is it, there's no other word for it than satisfying. Like,

like sometimes when people fall, they make a disgusting crunch noise and you're like, Oh, that noise. That's awful. I saw a guy's head get ran over by a, by a truck one time and it made a terrible noise it was a pop and but but this this was this was a satisfying noise she made when she hit the bottom she hit like so flush and square and that dust flying up i'm glad she lived everything i can't i still can't believe she lived

it's impressive no less minor injuries, no less. She hit like a tin roof that was strong enough to support her without going through it. Actually, what is a minor injury in fucking Afghanistan? I would like to know. Two legs. Two legs. You still have the majority of your limbs, and they round up. Yeah.

That's fucked, man. Woody just links it, and I'm like so yeah yeah that's fucked man i i what he just links in i'm like oh what's this thing here it said omg and then like media gif etc etc so let's see what this is and i'm watching and i'm watching and it's so when i saw her dangling it's i can't help but crack up and then when she followed it's like and then you see that she fell seven stories that's great yeah like the woman that was filming ran out with the camera and filmed down. Like she wanted to get – it's like she's messed up. She wanted to see it. I bet the woman stole.

I don't know. She stole? I made that up, but she yelled, may you learn your lesson. I assume she slept with her husband. The way I took it, I don't know where I got this, but I assume that the woman who fell out the fucking window was a maid and that that woman filming it was like her boss. That's true. And she's like, now you get. And that's definitely the dynamic.

What if what if now I know that people do do this in hotels. They'll go out a window and sneak around and go in your balcony into your room and rob you um and employees do that sometimes like if you found out that that was the case that this bitch had been like going out on balconies like habitually robbing people and this lady was like ah slip robin huh then maybe you start changing your mind about how you feel about all the characters in this equation maybe then then then you're counting the seconds till she makes impact too yeah the woman was a foreign maid in an arab state right so i i assume the woman was the well person she was working for who's filming and uh yeah i'm i'm making it up but i'm guessing she robbed again only because i know um uh i know a bunch of indian people and they all had maids and servants and stuff like that from Cisco.

And that was like a common dynamic. Like they, they just always had to sort of be wary of getting robbed. I mean, that seems like what else would they be doing? That was so awful as a maid, you know, it's really only stealing.

That would be that bad. Like all the, all the, if it was exactly what you say, Kyle, and she was oceans 11ing her way into the master suite or whatever the hell, and then on the way back, she slipped and fell,

all the bitch with the camera phone had to do is not film it. Just don't film it and stand to the side in the hallway and just watch from the corner. Or how about this one? Whenever you film it and they're carting this bitch away, don't put it on live leak. Maybe that's not your first

shit. Maybe you show the other maids, maybe you're like, this is what happens when you steal bitches, and then you delete that shit real quick, right? You don't upload it to the internet. No, she did not think these things through. That was her that uploaded it? And I don't even know the whole backstory,

and they're like, this is what happened to the last maid, and then you see, boom! And then it cuts, and they're like, this is what happened to the last maid. And then you see, boom. And then it cuts. And you're like, what did she do? Late. Late to work. Habitual tardiness. It's like that from Indiana Jones, you know, when Indy fucking punches the Nazi out.

Just throws him out the goddamn airship. And the whole crowd is like, oh, my God. All these fine-to-do, fine dining people saw this man just thrown out of a fucking airship dozens of feet to the ground, and Indy looks at him and goes, no ticket! And they all start producing tickets as fast as they can. Oh man, that was a great video.

Thank you, Woody. I feel better now. I see shit like that, and I'm like, man, my day has been so fantastic in comparison. I did not fall seven stories out of a fucking window. Not even one. And when I survived, I didn't hop up as a

female maid in a Muslim state. Which is, I mean, she probably got up and she's like, God, I made it. I mean, she probably had health benefits, I'm right yeah right i'm sure yeah they take great care of their foreign maids hey have you guys been on reddit lately like the new trend is posting how much your elected representative sold out for for that telecom bill

have you seen that i know richard birds for, for example, Richard Burb, you are $56,000 and he voted yes on that. People don't know, here's the deal. The House and the Senate in America just passed a bill that lets ISPs sell your like the data that you're sending over it.

So whatever website you're browsing to, whichever emails you're sending sending all that stuff is pretty much non-private and they can sell it to advertisers or whoever wants to buy it i guess and um uh the amounts that it sold like what it takes to buy a senator's vote seems curiously cheap to me like like i said 50 grand 60 grand, 40 grand. And these people are voting for it. And there's like, it's a big deal. Like people take it out, or someone took out a full page ad in the New York Times just for Trump. You know, like, hey, here's your opportunity.

Are you actually a president for the people or not? Because a bill's coming up. Now, I said something like, hey, you've been spied on, big league. That's about to happen to all the Americans if you sign this thing. And I'm really curious. If he vetoes it, then that would be a really big feather in his cap in my head. Yeah, it would, right? Yeah, that'd be great. I think we all take a step back, at least a half step back from Donald Trump if he vetoes this.

We're like, oh, wow's that's different if he's if he signs it there's almost no getting back to that in my you know between my ears anyway like yeah like this fuck all he wants to do it's like the health care bill wasn't a health care bill at all it was a tax cut for wealthy people and a benefit cut for poor people that's what it was um he's signing this thing putting coal miners back to work. I hate that. Of course, I want everyone to have a good job or whatever, but why are we focused on 1800s technology when China's focusing on solar and windmills and all that fun stuff? What else has he done?

Oh, he made it so that energy companies can take bribes overseas. He made it so that coal companies can dump their shale into rivers and streams now. Coal ash, right? Coal ash, yeah. What do they call it? Shale. Oh, my mistake. Ash.

So anyway, it seems like all the shit he's doing is the opposite of what I'd want him to do. And here's a chance. Here's your opportunity. You can veto a bill about and your internet traffic today this is very much equivalent to tapping everybody's phones and then selling the conversations to advertisers. That to me is how

sensitive your web browsing traffic is. They're about parallel. The things you say on the phone and the things you do on the internet. So this is an opportunity for Trump to be for or against the people. And after this, I'm done keeping score if he fucks up again. There's just no coming back. Yeah, I

hope he does it. I don't think he will, because it seems like all these politicians sell our privacy every single time. And if they don't get it, they just repackage it as a new thing with more anti-child porn, and then they send it back in, and theyackage it as a new thing with more anti-child porn and then they send it back in and they all pass it seems like the internet privacy thing is something that no

politicians give a fuck about the republicans don't the democrats it seems like so many of them are so old and so ignorant and removed from and you wouldn't think they are because they're in the public eye you think oh everybody who's on fucking the twitter or as a politician like they they're on the same page as us they've they've got a full grasp on social media and the internet and the power of it and how it works they browse they on multiple devices like we do they they hit the hot spots of the internet to take the pulse of of the country and the world and the and this sort of thing but they don't like like you i! You hear all the time that Trump's not that technologically inclined.

He's not in touch with the cyber. He's not checking out emails. He doesn't get email. He doesn't do that. I bet the most technically savvy person in the federal level of government, as far as elected representatives, the most tech savvy one of them, I bet if you put them in the same

room as Kyle or or woody obviously woody because of your background but kyle or me and we watch them use social media or watch them check their email i bet still we'd be like oh my god he puts in the search bar to go to google.com and then he searches in google for the thing he could have just oh my god he's using internet explorer he's using internet explorer voluntarily yeah's using Internet Explorer. Voluntarily. Yeah, they all have it, like 600 things on their desktop. Now where's that bill we're voting on? All these toolbars on the top of their browser.

So here's the thing. I was thinking about this today. Like, I don't have a problem with Republican voters. I think I have a lot in common with Republican voters, right? Like, I like guns, you know, and on the whole pro-choice thing versus, or they're pro-life, I guess. It's like, I'm not on your team, but I see your side of it, that's for sure. On the, like, less government regulation thing is a general concept. Like, yeah, I like freedom, you know.

But Republican politicians seem to be proving again and again what fuckheads they are and you know they've literally just had the presidency for two months now and almost everything they're doing is like rape and pillage the people whether it be selling their privacy dumping ash in the rivers you know they are the epa appointments the um the the tax the health care plan that they came up with which just reduced health care like everything they're doing seems to be the wrong thing and the same thing happened when W was president too to be fair

that's coming from your point of view where a lot of people defend the energy companies should be taking bribes thing I don't like when things are phrased like that because it's not genuine. Like, it's not honest in that there was not... He didn't just say,

all right, bribes are now on the table. Everybody's good with bribes. Like, the way that the news and everything is turned up to 11, like I've said before, it makes me just turned off to a lot of it, where it's just, oh, he did this. This isn't a healthcare plan. It's stealing money from the poor and giving it back to the rich.

Well, no, it's really getting rid of a mandate that forces young people to buy into an insurance plan that they otherwise wouldn't purchase because the benefits to them are non-existent, and it's really a way to get young, healthy people to siphon money with pre-existing conditions. Pre-existing conditions, by the way, you can't have an insurance company that acknowledges pre-existing conditions at the end of the day, because that's a company that provides care. If you need pre-existing condition coverage for your health care, if you already

have, yeah, it's the same thing as a burned down house. If your house is burned down, you can't purchase insurance, because that's not what the insurance industry is. When you say to insurance companies, like say whenetna left north carolina or whatever state because they couldn't turn a profit with obamacare they couldn't make money that's it's not because they're saying fuck all these people here we'll show them it's because they're saying all right well under these constraints we are incapable of running a business because you are forcing us to cover people that it is not financially viable to cover what you're asking us to do is to provide medical costs of the care to these people for the cost of their premiums.

So what's your solution for pre-existing conditions? I feel like you're just – I'm saying that it's not a fuck these people. It's a insurance doesn't fully work with pre-existing conditions. So here's the scoop. There's a couple ways to handle this, right? And you know this, I think. Before Obamacare you could have a high risk pool where people with pre-existing conditions have their own higher risk pool of

insurance a company would jump on that in a free market because they would make some money and it would be that they had could have their pre-existing covered condition covered for a higher premium and a higher deductible there that's separate from people who just want to purchase normal insurance through the free market because what obamacare did and what got rolled back from Trump is Obamacare made it so that every plan that is offered through that, every plan, if you're a young guy like me, your plan also has to include prenatal care. It has to include dentistry for children. It has to include a whole litany of services that I will never use just by virtue of the fact that I'm not female, I'm not a child, I'm not whatever. And it forces you to subsidize

those. It forces you to put money into those programs when it's not benefiting you. So here's the precondition thing. Let me jump in. You're still going? Go ahead, yeah. Do you want to keep going or do you want me to interrupt? So with the preconditions, right? Obviously, you can't have people just buy health insurance after they get sick, right? That doesn't work out. It's not viable.

So what Obamacare did is they said, all right, everyone has to buy insurance now, period. And then insurance companies can't start tossing people for preexisting conditions because what insurance companies would do is they would find a way to make your thing a preexisting condition. And literally it would be like, oh, you had acne. You had acne on your back. Sometimes that means cancer. We think you had it all this time. Fuck you. Now you're tossed off the rolls, right?

And with Obamacare, there's two choices. You can either always have insurance, and then pre-existing conditions is not a thing you have to worry about. Or you can come and go from insurance, but you can't expect companies to cover pre-existing conditions. So what the Trump plan was going to do was make it so that if you wanted to buy insurance, they would raise it their first year, whatever's first years by about 30%. They would like, if you wanted to buy, if you wanted to get insurance again, they sort

of fucked you on the price, but that would make up for it because you might be walking into it with pre-existing conditions that covered it. It was a different way of dealing with the problem. I like the Obamacare way because it made everyone buy insurance and that made everyone take responsibility for their healthcare. I don't like this idea. But it really didn't in a lot of ways. In a lot of ways, it forced people who are not going to get value out of healthcare into buying health insurance for the sole purpose of, like Obamacare without a mandate to make young people buy insurance at high premiums and high deductibles, it doesn't work.

See, I don't like the idea that you can say, hey, I shouldn't be buying health care because I don't get value out of it, so I'll just roll the dice because what happens is you still get care, right? If you say, oh, young people, they're impervious to sickness and injury, therefore they tend not to buy insurance, and then they get into a motorcycle accident, or and then they get cancer, or then they get a problem. And it's like, ah, you know, well, who knew? Well, you know what, I'm getting treated anyway, because we don't just let people die on the streets. We take them to the ER and we handle them. And what I like about the insurance mandate is it's a personal responsibility

mandate. You don't get people who just say, oh, well, you know, I don't get value out of it because I'm a non-sick person, you know, and it is cheaper when you're younger. It's not like they're paying the same price as 60 year olds. That's not true in the slightest. It was true that the plans were forced to require like, you know, prenatal care, for example, and obviously guys aren't going to pay that. But what it did is it took the cost of a baby and spread it across both the people that created it. Well, no. What it did is it spread the cost of someone's baby over lots of people who had no say in it whatsoever. lots of people who had no say in it whatsoever the people who are single young men and women who don't have a family who don't want to have to buy this mandate because they can you know

they think oh i got a decent job i can just go to urgent care if something bad or whatever their thought process is i do agree with you that like i like the way you phrase it of the personal responsibility thing it's a little weird to phrase it that way because it's not like if someone forces you to do something you're not being responsible you're just being forced to do it but i understand totally what you're saying and that it's really a complicated issue that i don't know it's it's hard i'm glad we're having a good conversation about it because it's really hard to have good conversations about it because it always seems to come back to one person saying it's not my fucking problem to take care of that like that's not fair for you to make me do buy

something you shouldn't be able to do that and then the other person saying oh so you're a bad person because you're gonna let people die you know you have to do this that and the other thing and it comes down to like an emotional argument i don't know i don't know what the actual solution is i just i'm fucking glad that that uh uh new health care bill didn't pass because that was not any it really wasn't any better than obamacare uh in in a lot of ways it was worse like nobody liked it republicans democrats it seems like everybody hey that's a positive thing right everybody yeah yeah the um i didn't like the way i think if there was one thing in particular i didn't like about it it was the pre-existing condition thing. So what they were going to do, for people who don't know, is they were going to remove the mandate to buy insurance. And when you do that, you get uninsured people. So how are we going to handle pre-existing conditions? They say, look, they'll still be covered. It's just that when you want to get on a plan, you pay a third more.

more. And that seemed to me like the unintended consequence was going to be most people don't get insurance. People, maybe you lost your job, you went uninsured for a little bit, you're trying to get back on your feet or whatever. Like if you're uninsured, my guess is things aren't swimming for you. And now you're trying to get insured again, but there's a wall there. You know, now this wall is a 30 30 additional price over what you'd regularly pay because you're coming in as an uninsured person and it was like man you know we're just gonna have boatloads of people without insurance because that first year is a problem and i thought it was a bad way to handle it that's what like trump care that's what i'm talking about whatever it is yeah they basically like oh we're getting rid of the mandate which i'm like hey that's what like Trumpcare or Obamacare lights, whatever it is they basically are like oh we're getting rid of the mandate

which I'm like hey that's good and then they're like but actually we're just gonna kind of move the mandate into the premium cost and hope nobody notices and it's like ah you're still fucking being sneaky with this shit like you're not really backing off of any I don't know

very frustrating to watch a lot of this unfold but we should get something on to Harley, something Canada-centric. Because I know you're very Canada-centric. Did you do anything? You said you were worried about... Hey, we could talk about hockey. We could talk about hockey.

Real quick, real quick. No, actually, I'm not the biggest hockey guy. That's okay. It's not really about you. And, pals, we're in a Sunnyvale jersey, so he has to talk about it. Out of the blue, somehow the Hurricanes are like a win away from the playoffs. Have you noticed this? They're a win away from the playoffs now?

They're like crawling back. Well, it's going to be something close to that. Take a look and tell me if you agree. Yeah, let me see. Carolina is... They could get a wild card spot if they play really well and beat out Tampa Bay or Boston, which if Boston misses it by one game again this year,

that's the third year in a row that they've been able to make the playoffs and then gone on a horrible loss streak and not made the playoffs because of their last game of the season. You're right when they say they have to play really well, but look, their competition right now is Boston and Tampa Bay. I think maybe since I looked at it, Tampa Bay won another game. But it was that they were like one win behind. Now they're a win in overtime, loss behind,

and Tampa Bay has a game in hand. So it's not quite – here, I'll show it to everybody. It's not quite as close as I thought. Yeah, they can only really catch Boston right now. So. I'll show it to everybody. They can only really catch Boston right now. Boston is who they've got to beat. They've got to stay ahead of Tampa and they've got to beat Boston. Dude, Carolina right now has a

playoff spot. No, they don't. They're one out. Boston has that second wildcard spot right now. Carolina's two points back. I'm looking at it wrong. We're going to talk about NHL. Yeah, they're just one win away from Boston. I hope they do make it.

The Blues have won 11 of their last 13 games. Let's talk about the interesting stuff in the NHL. So they're talking about expanding to Asia, right? Are you up on this? I read a bit about that. It sounds like you actually heard about it. What have you heard? I heard it today.

Is it China that they're going to? All right, so what I heard was that in the next year or two, they want to expand into South Korea. But there was a particular Asian nation that they were like, we're going there next year. And it was like the Canucks and one other team. The Canucks and the Kings. Are they just playing a game there?

Yeah, they're going to be playing a couple games in Beijing. But they're trying to grow the sport there. They feel like that's an untapped market. They want to get into China and South Korea next. I feel like football does this sometimes. They'll do some preseason games there. In England, they do. They've done that.

It's successful. They get better ratings on it. The Giants, I think, went over and played. Yeahland they do uh they've done that it's successful they get better ratings on it the giants i think uh went over and played yeah they do that right to me it's not interesting until there's a team there and it's hard to have a team there because they'd have the worst road schedule see that's the goal right you're trying to get in there and like plant the seeds now you know you could go in there now and you know how sports work like like we all as children saw that one guy hit hit and hit a hockey puck or hit a baseball and like oh now that's me now i need five thousand dollars worth of gear devoted to this sport over the rest of my life like we've all done that exact shit taylor

spent thousands on hockey gear you've spent thousands on hockey gear i've spent that my baseball bats were so goddamn expensive it was stupid just just all kinds of absurdities that we spend just because we saw some guy hit a ball How do you think that's over in South Korea? Isn't that thing to travel to America? They're trying to please the seeds for a Korean Hockey League They're trying to like get the sport there it grow the sport Globally, so the way it's going right now is the two biggest leagues in the world. The NHL is in its own league, literally. It's the best by far.

And then the Continental Hockey League is in Russia. And Russia, I just linked to their Wikipedia page. Russia, the KHL just expanded to more teams. And they just put their first professional team in Beijing. So Beijing just got their first KHL hockey team because I guess the KHL is growing. And so I think the NHL is trying to go over there and grow the sport even more, even though they don't really get along with the KHL that well.

And I don't blame them because all the really good, they're like, Sergei, you be career KHL hockey player. We've signed you to many ruble contract. And he's like, I just get off phone with Vancouver Canuck. I'm going to live in Canada. No, I will not come back afterwards.

It's much better there. That's what it's like. Or it goes the other way. I really hope they do grow it there. Like the Russian mob gets some play. They're like, why is Sergei playing for the KHL when he could be tearing it up in the NHL? It's like, well, because Sergei doesn well, his family killed. Yeah, yeah. Exactly. It's because Kolchuk

likes seeing his daughter. Yeah, but I hope it does continue to grow there. I think it's neat. But I would want to be someone in the stands in Beijing as everybody shows up for that first hockey game just to see what the response is because it's a very

unique sport compared to the rest like you can if you know soccer and you show up at a football game you can at least be like all right there's grass there's a ball people are getting hit more physical i got it but i guarantee they come overdressed like like it's gonna be like winter in there they're like prepared for a blizzard they've all got hats and scarves and stuff like yeah it's ice hockey however you say that in mandarin yeah oh that was japanese yeah ice hockey the other thing in the nhl that i that caught my attention was and i think maybe we discussed on pkn a little bit was you guys always talk about sydney crosby i don't follow the sport at all. It seems to me just observing you two

and your dynamic that Sidney Crosby is clearly like the best NHL player in the world and while no one wants to compare him to Wayne Gretzky, they probably should is the way it sounds and Woody's little funny game is pretending like

he's a shit player and he wouldn't trade any of his junk for that one guy. I get the joke or whatever. But the truth seems to be that Sidney Crosby is the best there is right now, and he may be a generational type player. And yet in the last two weeks alone, I've seen him commit two flagrant fouls with his stick. Oh my gosh. alone i've seen him commit two flagrant fouls with his stick oh my god that i guaranteed with my complete ignorance of the sport and how it's played that like if some half-ass from fucking buffalo had done this wherever the fuck like they'd have they'd they wouldn't just penalized

him they'd probably taken games from him that's from buffalo yeah any player i suppose he means finger off or like because i saw him skate up behind this player and put his stick between the guy's legs from behind and flop him in the nuts from behind and then he like does a little 180 and skates away like he didn't do nothing and like there aren't hundreds of cameras and thousands of people watching live and billions around the world not to mention youtube you know because because i saw it hits him right in the nuts on purpose and it's not even in a play really it's not it's not like he hit him in the nuts that guy missed a block now we score it was like i'm gonna hit that guy in the nuts it was like schoolyard bully shit and then this video can we watch this video it's like 40 seconds long

of him like oh is this the finger one he goes r Ramsey Bolton on this dude yeah all right I'm cute up in zero three two one play and I have had the pleasure so you're not gonna think it's that bad when it first happens you're her and then just give it a sec yeah I saw that picture beautiful work C because he's 87 here Waiting the thought responds first with just like you son of. He amputated the top of his finger. How did that happen? Aren't these gloves huge?

How does that happen? So I think he was wearing warrior gloves, and warrior gloves are more lightweight, and a lot of stick, like, this is what I read on Reddit comments, who fucking knows, but basically what happened to make that happen so perfectly is when Crosby slashed him,

it pinned his finger between the stick doing the slashing and his own stick, and it basically pinched it off. And I would have responded so much more if I thought my finger was gone. I don't care about the NHL. I don't care about my family in the stands or my career. If I can get this skate off like fucking – like I'm cast away and start doing a little dentistry on Sidney Crosby, I do. Fuck that. When I look down and in our sport, you have fouled me to the point where my finger is hanging off and you clearly just intentionally cut off my finger. The rule book is out. It's done.

the rule book is out it's done in a little bit of justice Crosby I think did break three teeth later in the game so a little bit but not even that much justice I bet they have great dental he's not Canadian

so I was going to be like they got that universal health care you don't give a fuck Crosby's Canadian but he lives in the US he's probably not going to be like, oh, they got that universal health care. You don't give a fuck. Crosby's Canadian. Crosby's Canadian, but he lives in Pittsburgh. Yeah, but he lives in the U.S. He's probably not going to go up to Canada. He's such a piece of shit, this guy.

He's the biggest heel in hockey. Everybody fucking hates him. No one respects him. Oh, my God. He did not own up to chopping. He was like, hey, man, fingers get lopped off when the cries come to play. If you watch him a little more like he'll just cry to the refs about every time someone bad breaths him and then you know on

the other hand he's chopping fingers off and shit and he acts like he's always getting the raw deal he's such a pussy and he's overrated i do not like that he did that to that man i have no dog in this fight you know what i mean like that poor man it means nothing to me like i don't care about either team i even sitting here having just watched that video i don't know what team the man he doesn't even know it was on right yeah yeah i just don't know but but still that he did that to another human being in on the field of sport as it were Which means something at least to me and it like when I when I see someone who's a heel and this is more than being A heel a heel like not is Nate isn't is Nate Diaz

You know he knocks you out gives you the fucking dub and double fingers He bitch slaps you and when he could have thrown across like that's being a heel this guy cut a man's finger off you don't see nate diaz come in and squirt you with a squirt bottle full of like vinegar in your eyes or something like like that doesn't happen this is this is fucked i don't like this at all i'm watching crosby's reaction and so are the people on repeat he does look annoying he's just like oh cry me a river do I care that I chopped your finger off? He's such an asshole. He probably doesn't know it was that bad, to be fair. Yeah, he didn't know it was that bad.

Yeah. Those hand slashes happen so often every game. Bro, I'd flick the blood on him for sure. I'd flick the blood on him for sure. Oh, I'd pick his nose. I don't know. I wouldn't do shit. I'd go to the medic is what I'd really do.

But he's a piece of shit. I'm curious, as you're a hockey player, what would you do in that moment? I would use my good hand to wipe away the tears and head to the medic. I think that's what I would do. It's probably so easy to be a big man until your finger's gone,

and you're just like, oh, fuck. In that moment, I might go into a rage and swing that fucking hockey stick across the side of his face and cut his ear in half. Like, that might be my response. Yeah, if you swing the hockey stick, you will actually go to prison at this point because— Marty McSorley? Yeah. You'll go to prison, though, right? And I'll shake the finger.

yeah we'll go to prison though and i'll shoot the finger and and and you'll see the look on crosby's face and we'll do the fucking thing outside of chicago and i'll fucking get off that'll be the end of that i i have they played again yet because i really feel like the next time ottawa plays the pittsburgh they should just be attacking his hands all night long i bet they will yeah i bet they'll come after him. And he earned it. He started this shit. And he won't get in a fight, which is a little annoying because it's like, oh, you should fight. But then it's also being like, no, if I were him, I wouldn't fight either.

Because no coach would ever be like, way to go, Sid. Showed him what's what. Go sit in the box for five minutes. It'd be like, way to go, Sid. Showed him what's what. Go sit in the box for five minutes. It'd be like, you idiot. You're the best player in the world. We need you out here. Dirtiest player, he meant. Let me do an advertisement.

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They are. They're taking off. They're great. Can't recommend it enough. Harley, what's new with you? What else is new? Talk to me, Maverick. Um, yeah. Um, playing a lot of games lately. What are you playing?

PC? Console? I play everything. I definitely I'll be I have video games in every room. Depending on which room I'm in is what I'll boot up. Obviously in my office I'll play some computer games.

But I have an Xbox in here and I have a PlayStation in my room. I bounce around everything. I'm playing a lot of Ghost Recon, For Honor, Horizon, Zelda, like just in bed, like everything in bed, everything in between shit. As soon as I want to like get out,

I always have like between TV, comics, games, it's a pillar of my life weekly that has to be like it can only be one of those like I don't get to read comics and play a video game in the same week which comics do you read I like I'm pretty sure it was last time I spoke to you guys

I recommended you guys read transmetropolitan I think or maybe we were talking about Trump a whole bunch, I recommended you guys read Transmetropolitan, I think. Maybe. We were talking about Trump a whole bunch, but I recommend you guys read that. The Killing Joke a little bit. What's that? The Killing Joke? Yeah, we spoke about that a little bit, right?

Yeah. Lately, I've been reading a lot of Marvel, so that includes the Star Wars comics, which are so sick. I think if people like Star Wars, they should just download the Marvel app and check out some of the Star Wars comics because they're really good. How does the Marvel app work? Like to get all their backlog? Yeah, it has literally every comic that's ever existed.

They also have a Marvel Unlimited one. Marvel Unlimited is like like it's like netflix you know you pay six bucks a month and you can go read every single comic like you could read all of civil war uh but the other marvel app is they have this function called guided read so like you know you take your iphone or whatever you like just turn it sideways and each comic frame appears one by one on the phone either this way or that way and you know when you flip a comic page there's usually a lot to take in now it just kind of guides you through each thing and it might just like go in on like a hand holding a lightsaber and then you press the next button and then it opens up and it's the whole page and you see it's

like darth vader holding a lightsaber. It's just cool. You put on like the John Williams soundtrack. So it presents it to you in a way that's superior to it. Completely cinematic. It's superior to the standard comic because there's spoilers in the bottom right page when you flip the page. Yeah. And sometimes it's cool.

It'll show you like something like the text bubble that says like i don't think so and then you flip it and it opens it up and someone is saying that you're like oh shit chewy's there whatever oh yeah but like yeah i like reading those i like reading uh um there's this awesome series called saga uh lately i've been uh uh punisher i like marvel i even watched the marvel shows you guys are talking about tv earlier i suggest you guys check out legion really good television show it's um the guy who plays the beast in beauty and the beast and he also plays this really awesome killer in this movie called the guest which is one of my favorite movies of like two years ago

his name is dan stevens and he plays legion who's like professor x's son and it's one of those tv marvel movies but they don't wear costumes they don't have like marvel battles there's nothing that really ties it to the cinematic universe but it's legion is one of the most powerful like uh mutants in marvel and so he just has his own show with an awesome actor and another actress in his aubrey plaza who i happen to really like her so i'm a big fan yeah so that's a great show you would love legion then i'm sure all of you guys would love it uh so i've been like in a marvel tear i started reading some punishers to punisher kills marvel universe deadpool kills

marvel universe which are these one-offs where Marvel does something sometimes that DC's really touchy about. Marvel will be like, if you write it interestingly enough, where you're like, yeah, it's Punisher, Snipes, Spider-Man in the head, Marvel will be like, show us, ah, looks good, write it.

You're like, yeah, and then Deadshot, Snipes, Batman in the head, it's like, okay. Yeah, right. No, no, it's a really interesting story, check it out. No, yeah, and then, you know, Deadshot sniped Batman in the head. It's like, okay. Yeah, right. No, no, it's a really interesting story. Check it out. No, no.

Nobody sniped Batman. There's rules. That is not allowed. Yeah, yeah, there's rules. By the way, that is how I kill Batman. That's horrible for his branding. For years, I've been trying to get the Penguin to fucking hire me because, like, we'll fix this. He's up on that building.

He's the only one who's a Batman standing on a building right now. That's true. He's very easy to spot once you've seen him. It's not like Superman where you'll be like, which one could Clark Kent be? As you're looking in a crab when he's in his normal clothes.

That's why I always liked about Batman Begins. Batman Begins, they did the whole thing of him being a a ninja they played up the ninja thing and you're like so that's how he disappears he's a ninja he's not like uh a guy in a blue suit that's like quick robin apply the disappearing paste and they start covering themselves so that they cannot it's like he's a ninja it's like like, yeah, he's... That TV show was such trash. Did you watch that? I've only watched clips online and it's hard to watch.

I watched that. And I swear to God... Old Batman. The one with... Adam West. I watched it as a kid. Oh, man. He had these drawn-on fat brows, I guess.

Yeah. I watched them as a kid, too. In broad daylight. that was the worst part is like there would be some trouble you know like the riddlers stole a vase or something right like that's what it would be and like they would go to see commissioner gordon and they'd be standing there in their like pantyhose in commissioner's office with their hands on their hips in the middle of the fucking day and they would figure out what they were going to do, like have a casual conversation about it,

and they'd be like, all right, well, we're going to go take the elevator, I presume, and hop in the Batmobile and drive away. The Batmobile, which is just parked out front? He was more like the Lone Ranger. I didn't like that Batman had dad bod. Oh, he definitely had dad bod. Batman had dad bod. Oh, he definitely had dad bod.

There was no trace of abdominal muscles at all on Adam West. He literally had shark repellent spray. Yes, he did for the water skiing episode. And Robin was like an acrobat and he did these really basic acrobatic

things like hanging upside down. And you were like like why would they hang upside down when it's not necessary to hang upside down and actually that that held batman back that was interesting and fun at the time but then it ended up holding batman back because batman was a joke until like the mid 80s yeah we're like they started redrawing him but they're like no no only in the darkness and let's make the blue black because it's just like dark and he became like uh kind of like a bat i always liked the batman that that beats people up i actually i hated superman versus batman but i love that batman he was like i love that batman too he was shooting people that was

awesome he is a brawler what'd you what'd you say he was shooting he was shooting people. That was awesome. He is a brawler. What did you say? He was shooting people. That was so badass. Ben Affleck is the best Batman we've ever seen. I really liked the Batman that had Heath Ledger in it. That was fucking amazing. He won an Oscar for it posthumously, and there's a reason for that. It was very, very good. But some of the times when Batman Christian christian bale is fighting it's

it's pretty fucking silly ben affleck fighting he looks powerful and big it's like you put mark hunt a much more athletic mark hunt in a in a suit when he hits people they feel it they feel it and they don't want to keep going anymore because he didn't hit him with a naked fist he hit him with some sort of bat glove right like he's all covered in carbon fiber and hard, sharp edges. And if somebody really gets in the way, he'll just fucking nail him to a wall. He's cutting and contusing. He's branding and beating.

It's a mauling. It's aggressive and it's ferocious. It's not quick Jet Li, sort of Bruce Lee, kind of like shut you down, sort of like block all your punches shit. No, it's i'm bigger stronger and and more and have more endurance than anybody in this room plus i'm wearing armor you're all fine and i'm really angry and super angry i'm a little upset i liked it a lot i liked there's a

scene where he's saving uh bat the superman's mother that's the scene that i'm picturing when i'm talking about all this when he fucking glides up into that goddamn room and he's semi-surrounded, and there's a part where he, like, shoots some sort of bat rope around a guy's feet, and he, like, slings that guy across the room, and, like, every time someone, like, puts hands on him, they get the worst, you know, they get, like, a broken bone, or they get smashed so hard they're not getting back up. That's what I want to see out of a superhero because I watch UFC, right? So I know what the best humans do when they crack each other. Now I need to see a next level

when I watch my superhero crack a human being because I've seen what the best people can do to each other. You've got to escalate. You've got to elevate. In that scene, Batman had already killed people. And I kind of thought it was a lost opportunity because he killed people already. And then he got in there and then that guy was holding Clark's mom. And he was like, oh, and then Batman shot him.

And I was like, that was awesome. But I wish he was there and he hadn't killed anyone yet. And that happens. Just like, nah, bam. I agree with you a thousand percent if the whole movie he'd been doing his standard batman routine of like preserving life at all costs and then he gets down to that guy who in the comics is a super villain you know the dude with the flamethrower and everything like like if he'd just been like had enough just yeah fucking

shoot him in the head like like almost like that indiana jones scene where the guy's out there with the big the arab guys got the big sword doing all the uh like the kata or whatever you know that's improv eh that is he was violently ill he was violently ill he didn't want to he was supposed to come out and do a whole fist fight with that yeah he said i'll just shoot him and that actor was really annoyed because he's like a world champion sword fighter yeah he'd been practicing you know he's there to fight another world champion sword fighter and show off his prowess and that would have probably gotten him some you know more students at his school but instead fucking no this this was the best this was the best thing for that scene i made that scene like legendary yeah absolutely because

it grounds it it makes it more realistic you, yeah, I wouldn't fucking sword fight him either if I had a hand gun. Like, look at that guy. We wouldn't be talking about this scene now if it went according to plan. Of course not. No, no. It was beautiful the way they handled that. I like when... I like anti-heroes. I like messy heroes. I like

the guy that I'm rooting for to be realistically dirty. Punisher. The Punisher is a little too dirty right i mean that motherfucker rides around he's just like oh crime i don't think so yeah the punisher is just riding around looking for some has he been killing the innocent people though it seems like he's making good selections i mean look you go back and read the comics and he can get a little misled sometimes he went after uh spider-man's boss that time like like he yeah the punisher it depends how he's written but like ultimately like uh ptsd vietnam uh and now it's interesting because a lot of the the timing of these characters that

made their origins made them who they were in the present day. Like 90s. Like you know what I mean? Or like 80s. Like it made sense to have this like. 45 year old man. Like in early 90s. Who has like PDSD from Vietnam. But doesn't make much sense in 2017. So they usually alter it.

They usually just alter the location. You know what I mean? What do you mean by that? They alter the location. Like you could read like you mean by that, they alter the location? Like you could read like a Punisher magazine comic and it would be like a reference to Punisher and it would be like he was in Vietnam and then he comes back and whatever. And maybe today you might read one that sets place in the 2000s and it's from Vietnam and he's older. But now they'll just be like, you know, I got back from Baghdad or something. He was somewhere. Like they change it to fit the timing. and he's older but now they'll just be like you know i got back from baghdad or something he was

somewhere like they change it to fit the time they modify the backstory to keep his age right and i read up a punisher uh comic that what i liked about it was they made him like pdsd but it was like he almost like he almost like made a deal with the devil, so he just wasn't going to go down. He just wasn't going to die. But vengeance is his driving motivator. And if vengeance is his driving motivator, there is no greater good. If Spider-Man is going to stop Punisher from killing the people that killed his family, he will kill Spider-Man. It's about justice in the ultimate form like

yeah that's what went down in that episode it was like he thought uh jonah jameson had somehow wronged him or committed a crime in some way he's like i'm gonna kill jonah jameson it's like spider-man's getting in the middle of it and at one he's totally ready to kill spider-man like like 100 it's not a big deal it's just like oh you're in the way yeah he's he's he's a little too messy for me now don't get me wrong i'm super looking forward to the punisher series on netflix i hope it is not the shit fest that i've heard iron fist is um i i keep seeing them mock iron fist uh fight choreography on reddit and stuff and that's terrible that's a shame because the only bad part really that and

the main actor is a little weird yeah see that that's that matters because there are very important things i know but if you're like a marvel fanboy it's fine and you'll you'll watch it and enjoy it iron fist is good except you know the whole iron fist thing doesn't fight well and and the lead character the lead actor he's bad too like yeah i know game of thrones oh yeah the martial arts that follows around that one guy martial arts isn't that good and that one guy isn't whatever but the show is like it's okay oh you mentioned martial arts so I'm going to completely transition so I've been watching

Boss Rootin's YouTube channel Boss Rootin fought in Pancreas you taught told slash told me that Woody and then I started learning more about Pancreas it was his fighting league in Japan you only used a closed fist if you're going to make a head strike or excuse me you cannot use a closed fist for head strikes a lot of palm strikes and uh what boss does is he swings these these hooks where he hits you with the bone of his wrist

and he'd clock you on the back of your head with the bone of his wrist and knock guys unconscious and uh so he goes from god what country is he from he from? Brussels or something? It's not that. I don't know. He's Danish maybe? Denmark. Yeah, European. He's a fighter in Denmark. He's got no ground game, though, and they invite him to come fight in Pancreas. So he's like, okay, well, how many rounds?

And they're like, one. He's like, oh, okay. How long is the round? 30 minutes. He's like, Oh, okay. Well, what weight division will I be fighting in? He's like, no weight divisions. Five at a time.

Okay, well, who will I be fighting first? And they're like, Wong Ping Dong, or whatever the fuck this guy's name is. He's the number four Japanese fighter on the planet, and he weighs 50 pounds more than you do. Get out there. So he gets out there he's shaved head big white guy he destroys this guy in like 30 seconds or something he he

it's it's a flurry and it ends with a knee and this guy is knocked out unconscious with his eyes open which is a scary thing um they have to help him up repeatedly he continues to fall bosses up bosses over there rubbing the back of his neck and instructing them to he's like rub the back of the neck the neck the blood get the blood back in his brain you know they're trying to like fucking get this guy going again like that's his first fight so on boss's youtube channel he commentates over every professional fight he's got and so that's the first one and he does the joe rogan part of yes for himself and so he remembers things in the fight he does the joe rogan part of it yes for himself and so he remembers things in the fight he's like you see this right here i didn't know what the fuck he

doesn't curse he's and i didn't know what i was doing i didn't know what i was doing look at this i could do this i could sweep his leg he's like he's like he's he's reaching around with his right hand i should sweep him into that direction and i could get up get back on top but i'm not because i'm stupid and i lose you know and there's plenty of fights where he loses but then they get to this one guy it's another white guy's fight frank shamrock right no shamrock's a bad motherfucker i know who frank shamrock is like god damn his fights against shamrock are fun to watch such a cool fighting name oh and he's such a badass like like the fight i'm talking about shamrock is ringside and you can see him shamrock's watching boss he's fucking stalking boss because he knows he's next.

So he's fighting this guy, and the guy keeps pretending like he's being fouled. He's like, oh, you punched me with a closed fist in the face. And the ref is, like, believing it. He's, like, he's successfully turning the ref against Boss, like, repeatedly. That's who I thought it was. Either he's saying it's a blow blow or he's saying it's a closed fist and it happens like three times and boss is like i've had enough now now i'm angry now i'm gonna show him and so he comes in there and fucking palm strike to the he shows him as he goes

open palm bam fucking hits him in the face fucking hurts the guy badly and then and then goes on a little more and then again another fake foul happens he's like now i'm really mad i decided i'm not gonna hit him in the face anymore only liver shots from now on and he starts hitting the sky and he says because that is the most painful way to lose knockouts yeah and so it's just all these liver strikes he's fucking these punches to the liver just perfect right on his liver of time, and then a kick to the liver. He drops him twice from these liver strikes. Second time he's getting up, the guy's eyes, I swear to God, are like this.

He's like, with the pain of this liver strike. In the end, he finishes him off with one more liver strike and ruptures this man's liver in the ring. He's like, and that is that. That is certainly that. That's a horrible way to lose a fight. But he shouldn't have been embellishing. No, no.

I really enjoy those on his channel. And I don't know if he ever beat Frank Shamrock, but I've seen him lose. It's not Frank Shamrock. It's Jason DeLucia. It is. He looks Italian. He's got black slick hair. Looks like a younger guy.

Good looking. Yeah, it was cool that he got to select how he won. He called his thing. If Bass Rooten would have hypothetically fight Sidney Crosby, and he was crying to the ref like he does, he'd win by liver shot. You'd chop his finger off yeah i really enjoy those youtube

videos though frank shamrock because i haven't watched all the videos but i've seen him lose to him like twice now um uh and i've seen him cheat there's one time where like like him and frank i don't know if it's it might be uh what's frank shamrock's brother. Ken Shamrock. Him and Ken Shamrock are tied up in dual leg locks. They both got a leg and they're kind of leaned away from each other. Boss is hitting him with the closed fist

on a cut that he has right here on his eye. He's hitting him with it over and over, right on the cut. Shamrock is laughing at it. He's going ha he's like sticking like that like sticking his tongue out and and boss hits him like and like on the third or fourth one with the with the close with the open fist he's tired of being mocked so he's fucking cracks him one and you hear the shamrock's corner go that was a close fucking fist

and his commentary is like a 40 year old man or whatever, he's like, and I'm trying to say that it was a, you know, it was an open fist. But, you know, I was just mad. Right. I clacked him one. Yeah. It's fun to see his, you know, his his perspective on that so many years later. And what I really liked hearing from there's one point he's like, which if i if only i could go back if only i could go back and i think to myself like man if you could send him back he would really be such an exceptional fighter you know because like

with those 45 years of like information that he now has to put it back in that 25 year old body that was crushing people dude i really love those those videos though It's fun to listen to that. Yeah, it's neat. This is the scene that Kyle's talking about. Yeah. He's smiling. He's like, yeah, come on. That looks like UFC.

Or not UFC, WWE. Where it's like, oh, and what you doing here? Giving the goblin grimace oh he's about to go crazy or whatever they would say. He's hulking out! He's hulking out! He's in Hulkamania. Nothing can hurt him. He's in Hulkamania

right now. He's impervious to any and all attacks outside. I like that when Mac explains it so matter of factly. What you're seeing now is a state of huckle me oh about i went to the the dentist today and peeled back another layer of the of my big headed onion get a reason yes yes so i went to the dentist today i hadn't i'm convinced first of all the fucking cavities are bullshit. A lot of the time, because I have not been doing the like every six month thing for a couple of

years now. I know I need to get back to it. Like you're supposed to, but I've just taken huge swaths of time off from the dentist. And I've never had fucking problems with the cavity. That'll come bite me in the ass. Now guaranteed. I'll have to get a root canal or something,

but I got there and they did the whole x-ray where they charge you like or you charge your insurance 120 to sit you in a vest and then go and then they do that and i was looking at the thing of my face where it's cut off like right here at the nose and like your your orbital socket whatever you can see all the sinus shit and she's like your teeth all look good very normal like they're in good shape and i'm'm like, nailed it, knew it. But there's two skulls here. Yeah. It looks like you have a twin that grew,

and it's just been living inside your head. You're the weird one. But she's like, what we do, she started being indirect like doctors do, and they want you to come to a conclusion that they don't want to break something to you almost.'s like now what we are seeing that's weird is up here in your nose is is have you is there something and i was like yeah i broke my nose a few times and they had to go in there and mess with it i couldn't breathe as a kid so they had to straighten that

out and she's like oh okay because it is not at all like a normal nose a normal nose and then she went through and explained it to me it was like a normal nose a normal nose and then she went through and explained it to me it was like you would see dark areas here of a clear sinus path you can tell that something's been done up there for you you said you had some surgeries but there's not a lot of area there you could see whatever as long as it was his first day can you breathe now yeah that literally that was a question literally can you breathe now yeah i can breathe now i'm a good breather and she shuffled yeah she shuttled me back like put your hand on your mouth and you go i knew it liar like that that makes sense because like they uh i guess that has something to do

with your teeth like breathing if you breathe your mouth open too much you'll fuck with your teeth or something but take me back to the doctor's office i sit in there and wait for him and she does my whole thing hunky dory doctor comes in starts looking and he seems way more concerned about the tooth grinding problem i told them i told the lady before because i grind my teeth in my sleep bad because my teeth don't line up like the way teeth are supposed to they just line up right on top of one another and it just sucks and he's like is your do you wake up with awful awful headaches often i was like no no should i he's like can you pop your jaw out of your socket i'm like i don't think so and i couldn't and he goes okay well one sec oh see right here yeah with your beard i couldn't tell

as much can you grit down for me and i bit down and he goes oh yeah and he used me like a fucking learning experience for the hygienist there where he was like yeah when you came to me and i bit down and he goes oh yeah and he used me like a fucking learning experience for the hygienist there where he was like yeah when you came to me and said uh that taylor was having problems with grinding you can absolutely tell right here taylor bite down for us and i bit down see this right here that's his his masseter muscle is enormous and like he's like these biggest masseter muscles i've ever seen and i'm like oh hooray and he's like, these are the biggest masseter muscles I've ever seen. And I'm like, oh, hooray. And he's like, not necessarily.

Basically, the masseter muscle is the muscle that closes and opens your jaw. And if you have a problem with the way your teeth line up, basically you're forcing it to work out all the time, every day. Because when you fall asleep, your teeth aren't lining up correctly

and so your tells your brain to be like hey separate those then they separate them and it's not right either so close those up and they close and it's just it doesn't quite work and i'm grinding all the time and so i have one of those hand exercises in your mouth all night every night for your entire life i bet you you asked earlier what the bite strength of a man was. I was just going to go there. It's what is my bite strength because yours could be – It's like alligator, crocodile, bull shark, Taylor. The question is whether a man could face a tiger with no claws. It's whether Taylor could face off against a tiger with no claws. No, we're like – I think we're like 200 PSI and a tiger is like 1,200.

We're talking about taylor here so 230 i have the same thing by the way everything you were saying the exact same thing i grind my teeth at night and in fact i switch from the left side to the right side of my jaw constantly in terms of which one clenches and i'll catch myself doing it throughout the day and if i if i think something is like like really uh cute or if i'm like really uh aroused or if i'm like angry they start flaring up on both sides and i only know because people have pointed it out to me oh that you're like grinding when you're awake? Yeah, I'll do it when I'm awake. I'll start clenching my jaw.

And this right here, if I bite down, my finger will pop out literally half an inch just because I'm always grinding it. And I feel the muscle on it. When I flex it, clench it like i feel it and it's hard i was doing that the whole way home from the dentist where i was like i guess these are pretty fucking big you know like some nice chewing muscles here you're like hey guys i'm doing it right now yeah but you've got a fucking mask on I know I was gonna say like I enjoy the beard

Cause like you just don't see how much it's like I'm biting down your bottom jaw You could be like that guy from Boardwalk Empire Nobody would know There's just nothing under here Yeah you'd just be a hole Yeah it's not It's not great I knew it was a bigger problem

because the the doc the dentist seemed pretty set on like this is not something that you ignore and you just show up in 10 years with 30 less teeth like you want to make sure that you get this taken care of while you can and you still have good teeth like i don't i don't have any like you know how he said this to me he said you know how molars usually have little spikes on the top yeah and i was like yes and he's like you don't have any of those i was like you've got like these big flat grinding teeth like a brachiosaurus like they're just made for like like grinding seeds and so are you gonna sleep with an appliance like what's the next step i i asked him about it i'm like all right can you give me a retainer or something so i can do that and i've had a retainer before when i got my braces off and i would just wake up every single

morning and it would be hidden in the covers somewhere because i don't know when i did it but apparently i i would always spit it out in the middle of the night and wake up without my retainer and so hopefully that won't be a problem this time because it, I don't know, just... Are you getting one? I'm going to end up getting one unless there's, like, another solution where they fuck with, like, adding shit onto my teeth

because I've ground down. Like, my incisors, or my canines, rather, on my upper level have no spikes at all. They're actually so dull that's what i'm saying is they would build a spike onto it and that would make the bite better but like usually like this like a v is your canine mine is so dull that it's like the bottom of an ice skate it's like a upwards u where there's almost like two little points because so much of the middle is ground down and so i'm i don't know he when he said how old are you and i'm like oh i'll be 26 soon he was

like oh well i had another patient with a similar issue he was 41 though and so you're really grinding ahead of your age i was like thank you i tend to anyway so i thought And I read on a 30-year-old level. That's what I thought was interesting is just, you know, another layer peeled back, the big masseter muscles, making the head look bigger. All these pieces are falling into place. So I'm going to go get a bone scan, see if I have a Homer Simpson skull,

like the strong, extra strong thing. I wonder if anybody actually has that. I saw a gift with you guys in some sort of head-butting contest last night. Yes, I saw that. I thought I saved it. Those fools. That's your fucking brain carriage, bro.

Basically, they were having a head-butt fight, and it was just what you'd expect. Two guys struggling with their weight, looked like maybe no higher education. And now it's off the table entirely. Yeah, and they just headbutt. And you could tell at first they headbutt,

then they headbutt a little harder, then a little harder. And then one of the parties is losing enthusiasm for the headbutt contest, but there still two or three more and it was just like and then his blood like like rams going at it you know that's so dumb it's like give me a headache thinking about it that's how giraffes fight apparently yeah oh yeah they like bash their heads together use their necks as whips and smash heads yeah it's pretty cool. They got those horns up there, those little... Yep. Yeah, their head is like a morning star of sorts,

just whipping around. Yeah, those are actually... Those aren't technically horns. Horns are made of, like, something else, some material. But ultimately, it's some hard points on their head. Yeah, the difference between horns and antlers is horns are skin. Horns are layers of skin

that are hardened and are growing together and they'll bleed if you saw a horn off and I think antlers are like bone. Yeah, I think you're right because you can just saw right through an antler and it's just an antler. Yeah, I shot a deer's antler off one time. Yeah, if you show like, that's like the saddest thing to realize when you see those poachers like clips because you you like have that misunderstanding the whole time like i used

to hear like oh they're stealing ivory from and uh and rhino horns and i'm like yeah but like i'm sure they just take it off and then they send them back to grow a new horn and yeah exactly and then i like saw a picture and it's like a dead two-ton rhino with just a bloody stump on its nose and it's like oh god damn this thing died because they sawed this basically organ off of it yeah so now so now like because of genetic selection well because of human interference the the elephants are now being born with smaller and smaller tusks Yeah, so now, like, because of genetic selection, well, because of human interference, the elephants are now being born with smaller and smaller tusks. I guess that's the way to preserve your elephant population, like, genetically engineer them not to have what these fucking assholes want to take from them,

rather than, like, I keep seeing these, like, this group of, like, female badasses that are all tatted up with assault rifles in Africa, and I want to learn more about this because it just doesn't seem like the sort of environment that they would flourish in. I can't see Trump's children cutting the tails

off of elephants and fucking with them. Have you not seen that? Seeing what? Trump's kids. Yeah, apparently they hunted exotic animals, elephants and big cats. I don't have a problem with that. You said they cut the tails off elephants and fuck with them. They did.

Well yeah, maybe that's a trophy. You do that once they're dead. You don't go to a living elephant and cut its tail off. Something that people don't know about these elephant hunters and these lion hunters and everything is a lot of the time they do that is because it's a an alpha male elephant that will not let any other of the uh adolescent males near the female elephants and it basically just becomes detrimental and so they'll sell the ability to kill the old alpha male rhino or old alpha male uh elephant i don't know if they do for rhino i don't fucking know

but old alpha male elephant so then you kill it it costs a fuck ton of money all that money goes back into the preserve conservation and it helps with conservation and in the end it helps with the environment there too because you're killing this alpha male old ass elephant who's like you're not fucking my daughters and wives when although you know what happened after cecil that that whole thing over cecil the lion right you know what that guy had paid, dentists had paid like a quarter million dollars to go over there and kill this fucking lion. And because of the outrage, this whole business of, like, hunting lions goes under. Well, what are they going to do with all of their lions now, now that they can't afford to keep them? They killed them all.

They killed them all. That's what happened because of your outrage. Because everybody was like, oh, my God, one got shot. Now they're all dead yeah it's the exact same thing that happened with my buddy who's got the guy in texas who's got the uh the big game ranch he had this one breed of red deer that was rare and all of a sudden they said ah you can no longer hunt that kind of red deer you can't import them for the purposes of hunting you can't keep them for the purposes of hunting say oh well then we'll just slaughter the entire herd then because we're not going to keep them here for no reason.

We're going to slaughter all of them that exist because we don't want them here because what if a hunter accidentally shot one? Then we're liable for that. And they're just taking all the resources from the other animals that are here to be shot. So they slaughtered all of them. And it wasn't just his place.

Like, all of them got slaughtered. It just, it's, they do these things because they do these unintended consequences the unintended consequences are terrible you've really got to take a step back from just about anything and everything and be like well why do they do that why let me let me hear the other side of why hunting is a good thing and i don't fucking hunt but it's clearly a a productive thing especially with something like elephants or something in that scenario you're describing where these lions, when like if there isn't someone there with a lot of money, then the lions all die.

Because people are just their territory is diminishing and people are moving in. Because then there's no incentive to keep those birds alive. Free and do lion shit? There is no more free, right? Lion shit is really hard because we've actually really ruined things for lions in a big way. They were the second most populous species of mammals, right?

Second to us, they used to be. Yeah, yeah, after us. I feel like I've read this. Yeah, we've displaced lions so much that they're in areas with so little food, like so little water. They're so like, like a lot of these animals, like, you know, we think about extinct animals, like, yeah, like, oh, they're extinct. They're going extinct. They're endangered. They just don't even think about how difficult the lives of some animals are. was watching like the latest planet earth and watching like a pride of lions walk literally

looked like hundreds of miles to go from one attempt at eating a meal to another attempt at eating a meal and failing both of them and you're like damn the amount of calories needed to operate this cat this huge creature like the same size as me like i need like 2 000 calories they're not they didn't get anything in like two days i saw that with a polar bear once it was sad and then that is it's always sad he took on i don't know my walrus from my sea lions or yeah they do but but in the end the polar bear took on something that it normally wouldn't have out of desperation. It was a risky hunt. And he managed to live but get hurt and died. Like a walrus or something? Yeah.

Or is a sea lion bigger? A walrus is bigger than a sea lion. Okay. It was most likely a walrus then, yeah, with the tusks. And now the bloody polar bear is like, well, that didn't work. And he's the only food in town and I'm feeling really fucked. And indeed he was. Yeah.

Yeah. It's almost good knowing that they don't fully understand their fate and have self-awareness. Because imagine the torture of being a hyper-intelligent bear who's just out there. And you understand your mortality enough to be like, alright, if this walrus fight goes south, which it probably will because it's much larger, I'm dead. I will die. I think a lot of animals do.

I think a lot of animals have a sense of self. Yeah. I think that primates do. I think that certain marine mammals definitely do. Like the orcas and stuff. And maybe the dolphins. And every time I read another article today about orthopods, I guess, like octopuses and cuttlefish and stuff, and their fantastic levels of intelligence, despite the fact that they're really short-lived.

It was fascinating to hear this guy telling the story about a fucking cuttlefish taking him by the hand and guiding him to his little sea home and showing him all. He's like, it's literally guiding me along. It's holding my hand. And showing all the puzzles and things that they can figure out, whether it's unscrewing a jar to get a fish that's inside or blocking up the reservoir on their tank so that their tank will overfill so they can get out, get into another tank and eat fish and then hop back in their tank. They'll shoot water out of their tank at the electrical outlets and short them out um all kinds of ridiculous things that they do and and and oh they could recognize human beings who are dressed alike so like we could all be wearing yellow uniforms but he'll like me and he'll

dislike you he'll shoot water at you but he'll i'll be able to feed him these are literal things that happen with these octopus and cuttlefish i like taylor often says and i'm not sure who's right and obviously i've never been a bear but um i'd be like hey it's good to know that the bear has no intelligence or this or that and i think you know i feel like my dog does and that i assign a bear a similar level of intelligence to what my dog might have i guess it's not intelligent i think the dog is much smarter than the bear. It's more self-awareness. Like, you can be smart and still not understand your own existence,

like, that you are a finite being and aren't just a permanent set of consciousness limbs and shit moving around. Like, I think that only a couple animals really get it. And like Kyle was saying, I don't know about the orthopods or whatever, but dolphins definitely do. some whales are really smart chimps some other monkeys we know little monkeys we start to get dumber crows are smart we we judge like intelligence in a really funny way

though we like we grew up all of us here talking we grew up in a time when it was like can you read can you write no well then you're dumb but someone could be excellent at math and excellent at memorizing and just not be good at recognizing letters on a page but our school systems have been built up with like if you can't read then you're gonna suck from everything moving forward like nothing will be so someone who's not good at reading recognizing things can be like really good at perspective like an excellent painter maybe they can come up with they're good at memorizing or they are good at like physical activity come up with like you know like Floyd Mayweather planning planning you know there could be like a million things that this person could be good at but we judge intelligence by like

reading writing let's say math but there's other ways you could be smart and you know even just being strategical look at like you could be a quarterback not know how to read write do math but you're smart in some way you're demonstrating intelligence for that if you could outsmart if you could outsmart other people then you do have some intelligence and sometimes like we judge you know a dog or a cat or whatever on intelligence is based similar to us but it's the same thing it's different types of intelligence like my dog knows that if he's cute you know maybe he doesn't even know he's being cute he see he gets a treat but like a cat will know that if it acts cute it can get a treat.

And that's a way smarter ability than the dog. Because you're anticipating the outcome. Right. But I heard that elephants remember specific humans as well. And I always thought that to be... You can see sadness. They cry when their baby dies and that's really smart to me and apparently when elephants make their trek when they get to a location that an elephant has

died before on the trek in previous years even if it's years and years the elephants stop and stay for a moment silent and then continue moving and they do that at every spot that an elephant has died on their trail like an elephant of their you know their their little clan which is also like a really crazy level of intelligence because it's like it's like compassion and emotion is a form of intelligence and it means that they understand death they understand death is kind of like it's it you know like that's what that is the gorilla understood death they they fuck remember that that whole thing we watched about her them explained to coco that her kitten was dead and she was like it's never coming back or whatever and just crying and crying like that's

fucked yeah it was so shitty that they told the gorilla that that it's cat dog they totally could replace that kitten with a they could have been like no coco what happens is when a kitten grows up it goes to a to a a kitten play plant pen you here's a new kitten you'll raise this one up and then it goes to the pay play pay pit why the hell wouldn't they do they had that debate that was a huge a huge debate with scientists and whiteboards. And they were like, do we have more of a chance that she loses her mind if we try and replace it and not tell her? Or if we tell her the truth about death, which one is she going to go ballistic on? Like, which one is the safest way?

And I guess they just vote. To break bad news to a gorilla. Yeah, man. I I guess they just vote. To break bad news to a gorilla. Yeah, man. I think they chose wrongly. They could have been like, Coco, your kitten had to go away. It went to a better place because that's what happens to all kittens

when they grow up. Here's your new kitten. When it grows up. That's when you get like, I don't want this new kitten. When's the other one come back? Or yeah, maybe. Well, we just see how many kittens

it tears in half before it finds one it likes. Right? Like kittens are not in short supply. That's true. There's a lot of free ones. By the way, that's a YouTube channel of the future. It's just an ape ripping kittens. Ha ha ha! That reminds me of 2025.

Dude, YouTube and the whole advertiser friendly thing has been going bonkers have you been following that at all anybody i have you know what i say i i actually go with this stuff whenever it gets here because like i've always i've i'm like a huge subscriber to the fact that there's probably like some weird weird conspiracy shit going on with this stuff but think about it conspiracy shit going on with this stuff but think about it think about it wall street journal is like a real and important news outlet agreed and all it took was a youtuber the biggest one fine but a youtuber to just like like clap back with two videos and completely make a mockery of, of,

of a, of a brand to all these new people growing up. So you could be the wall street journal for 45 years or whatever and be excellent. But the truth is there's millions of people now and children growing up that know you as a joke. You got shat on by PewDiePie. Do you know what I mean?

And that type of power, I've always said it, is when YouTube first started happening and like Epic Meal Time popped, it was seven years ago, five years ago, even four years ago, I used to be like, why are people just letting this happen? Like, why are people letting this just happen? Like, I found myself in position sometimes in the past you know where i'm sure you guys have as well where you're like oh man like i think people

will listen to me people value if i were to get behind a cause a fraction of my audience would get behind it too and a fraction of my audience is a couple million people and so when you times that by so much and you have like someone like PewDiePie who's like beating down the Wall Street Journal and even so much is like flashing their sponsors on YouTube like here are their sponsors and then uh you know you get on the same on the other side of the coin but same coin you have like Casey Neistat being bought by CNN for 25 million dollars on the front page of the Hollywood Reporter and you know he's looking like a badass there and these are two guys that have got to where they are by using nothing else other than really like a phone you know what I

mean like the internet stuff that's available anyone can become them and in the term of in the idea of of of of man and ability and power like like what pewdiepie can do it's going to sound like a crazy thing but what pewdiepie can do now and today with moving people is something that was literally considered godly you know uh hundreds of years ago if you can go and get a million people to do something for you that's a godly thing to be able to do it's pretty it's on a level you know that's why it's so dangerous for these instagram girls with a big ass to have three million fucking followers it's dangerous all right we need to be more selective about who gets that much influence we are selective you just don't like the selected the selection criteria she's got

i was gonna say but that's that's part of it because like whether it was someone got got started because they were showing their booty on instagram or they're screaming at video games online the point is anyone could be in that place and just like you're saying now whether it's partially humorous or partially serious it's true enough that i believe the conspiracy aspect is the powers that be powers that be truly believe that and it's like well god damn it we've made a system or we didn't make a system a system was created where any random uh jew hater i don't think pd pi actually hates jews uh can go and amass an army of 50 million people and then he can go and look at a company that's been around for so long and tell them that they're a failed business and have all these people back him and he can

sway and you know and like the internet can can can shift conversation so much. And you know that terrible term that I don't like using but makes perfect sense. Influencers can influence that ability? No. Has to be stopped. Who are the most powerful or the most influential influencers today? I believe, especially with younger people, it goes to YouTubers. Because you have influencers on Instagram. You have them on Snapchat. You have them on Snapchat.

You have some on Facebook even. But everyone who becomes an influencer moves to YouTube. Even super-sponsors go to YouTube. That's where it starts. That's where one man can go and become an influence to many people without using anything more than like a $400 device. So the one thing separating like the media Illuminati,

the controllers of all communication in the world, the ones that you can serve all their power is like a cell phone. What's that? Anderson Cooper worked for the CIA. He has no background in journalism. This probably folds right into your little theory.

Well, I'm just saying, if you can't control who becomes a star anymore like you used to be able to do it, well, then you just get rid of the current star maker, which is YouTube. And Casey Neistat put out that video when he's like, who are we? These people are like, you know, they're the aristocrats on the top deck of the Titanic, and we're the fucking iceberg. That's true. That's genuinely true. Random people like us right here, we can go and get on the microphone, and we can be like this, that, this, that, this, that.

Hundreds of thousands of people will listen to this. This is power, and that's a power that used to be controlled by corporations and sponsors. It used to be controlled by a company that would spend $2 billion. Now there's no control of it. Anyone with a cell phone can be that. So what's the best way to control it? Take the money out. I mean, if you think about what PewDiePie could possibly make in a year

in the best case scenario, to the top advertising company, that's an accounting error. His amazing salary, if he gets paid that to play video games that is an accounting error for a real corporation like we're not big dogs even the biggest big dogs on youtube are not big dogs like 25 million dollars doesn't mean much if a company is spending two billion billion on advertising in a year. So that being said, these companies, these corporations, these people that control it or whoever it is, I'll just call them the man.

I don't know what it is. They come in, use influence to pull money out of someone like YouTube, cut off the lifeline to all creators. Being a creator isn't going to be such a desirable job anymore if there's no money in it. But I really am for the idea that advertisers will go where the people are no matter what. And this is like a semi-bluff. This is whatever it is. Sure, pull out advertiser money, step away from YouTube all you want want this is where the kids are this is where the people will be this is where people will come back to and if it's not youtube it's going to be another site but no one gets to control media or communication anymore unless they control the

entire internet so i'm just saying i think this is one move to kind of control influence and communication and media on the internet and it starts by taking the power away from those powerful people that aren't under control people like pewdiepie super interesting but just as a background for people who don't know it uh the story is this this is the less conspiracy version of it um the sorry i went i went deep on it before you even gave it we didn't really lay out what the deal is. I want more conspiracy. So they're advertisers pulling ads from YouTube.

About $750 million worth of ads they're pulling off of YouTube in total. Big advertisers that you've heard of like Pepsi and Ford and more. And basically they're upset that they don't have more control over which videos they place their ads on. They don't want to be putting ads on like white supremacy videos. Because when I advertise on a white supremacy video, I'm somehow kind of pseudo endorsing it. And they don't like that. But YouTube doesn't have the tools to really like know the content of a video and match it up with the producer. Right.

I mean, they have tags and stuff like that yeah yeah i thought you're going somewhere else yeah yeah but it's very hard to um uh you know the minute i upload a video they don't have any kind of analysis on it and it seems like the first answer is like the the advertiser is going directly to the youtuber that they want so like if i'm ford motor company like i get those guys doing ford motor company related videos and go straight to them and just get them to play my ads, right? Well, I mean, there'd be very limited content. If you want. Yeah, if they could work with a content creator directly, I guess.

But when they've got like a billion dollar buy, I exaggerated, but work with me. They're pricing $10 million worth of ads. They spread it out all over YouTube. And sometimes it lands on videos they don't like. So they are asking YouTube to make better tools so that they don't get on the wrong videos. And YouTube has responded by almost instantly, like demonetizing tons of videos. And I don't know if they're exaggerating. I know H3H3 and Jenna Marbles both said, I think all their videos were demonetized. but I think the reality

is it was probably just too many for their taste and then there's some others there was a prankster who got all upset on Twitter over a camel toe video and you know

I'm going to say his name he should not be named I'm with Keemstar on this one dude not be named, but I'm with team star on this one that like, dude, if you make a camel toe video and it gets demonetized, fucking expect that. Yeah. Yeah. When we pepper spray Jeremy,

I was like, well, I guess we just don't get paid this time. You know? Yeah. Yeah. Like I've had videos demonetized and I thought that they were really off target.

Like the microwave videos come to mind, you know, you're violating guidelines and this and that and then i've had other videos where i think the um i think i had a daily vlog and i mentioned the orlando shooting and that got demonetized and it was like well that's what you get you know like people don't want their ads on hot topics and this was the orlando shooting so suck it up it's annoying though because people like they want their ads on hot topics guaranteed because that's where they're gonna get the most eyes it just seems like they don't want their video on hot top or their ad rather on hot topics

that are made by just regular content creators they're fine having the ads on those shooting catchy titles if it's cnn's youtube channel if it's msnbc if it's fox if it's one of the players in this realm yeah if it's one of those they're fine but oh no no we don't want you know joe steven stevenson the blogger doing this you know that's great it does seem like a way that they're underhandedly trying to seize power from these individual creators and make it so that they're pushing it more into the hands of traditional media creators. Because if some independent liberal or conservative guy has an opinion on the terrorist attack in Brussels or whatever the fuck it is, it doesn't make any sense for clorox to go oh i'm not putting my ad there i will put it on this one with a talking head though where they talk about the same stuff and show the same footage like that's what i don't like about it i follow kyle were you trying to

say something yeah i was gonna tell everybody a little bit about texture 2016 was one for the books uh 2016 was one for the books the cubs finally won the world series we said goodbye to far too many celebrities in the election. Game changer. 2017 is a whole new world and it's easy to stay informed using the Texture app with access to all the top magazines right on your tablet or phone. The Texture app has gone beyond delivering just the magazine itself. They've made it easy to find and enjoy the articles that you want to read with daily recommendations, exclusive interactive features, videos, and more. Texture makes magazines easy, and there are so many great ones out there like Rolling

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when you go to texture.com slash pka. Texture.com slash pka. Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, they do a neat thing over there. Oh, by the way, I fact-checked the Anderson Cooper thing because I thought it was really interesting. And mostly true. So he worked as an intern at the CIA

when he was still in school for two years. And then that was it. He didn't work there. He never got... I don't know if interns get paid or not, but he never pursued a career with the CIA. It wasn't like he was a real spook or anything. From what I understand...

I wonder who you have to... Hang on. From what I understand, that's a similar little credential thing that doesn't look like much that you see on a lot of guys who end up working for the CIA in secret. It's like, oh, yeah, yeah, Dave, he interned for the CIA back in the 70s. Yeah, that means he's still in the CIA. Yeah, I keep hearing them say – what they say repeatedly whenever this comes up is once in the cia always in the cia they're like my my my my friend's brother's dad's 65 years old he's been out of the cia for like over a decade but he still gets a phone call every now and then and he still like voices some opinion on this or that and

there's all and you know there's stuff that happens so and then oh the thing about no journalistic background i thought that was interesting too and uh and that turns out to be mostly right like his his major wasn't journalism or anything but he was in show business literally since he was a baby like he was on air as a baby his mother yeah everybody anybody's on the tonight show at three years old taylor i don't think you should i don't think you should need the journalistic experience to be a journalist. Because we can all be journalists. Not experience, but education. He has no education.

No, even that, I don't think it fucking matters a lot of the time. Because when you're learning in journalism school, someone who goes to a J school, write in the comments how I'm totally wrong. But journalism is just something we do. We're being kind of journalists when we're talking about shit and giving our opinion about it. We have no integrity. No, no, no. But what I'm saying is that I don't like the idea of journalism being for the journalists.

Because then you're taking any kind of commentary on current events and saying, well, if it's not filtered through fucking Bill O'Reilly or Anderson Cooper or Rachel Maddow, then it's not. But that's the problem is that they're all like, no, it's the same thing as like Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart. So many of these people are totally fine being biased motherfuckers. And then when they get called on stuff, it's open. I'm a commentator. I'm not actually a comedian. The fact that I was misleading everyone with wrong information was just a bit. It was a bit like or this is just an opinion program.

It's just – it's a little bit dangerous to be like, well, these are journalists. They do the journalizing. They tell us what's happening. I like to get medical opinions from doctors, legal opinions from lawyers, and it would be nice if I got my news from a journalist like a Walter Cronkite-type professional who was up there who I knew couldn't be bought or intimidated. Kyle, you're right, but you're in the minority. Because I think nowadays the left likes to get their news from comedians. The right likes to get their news from opinion guys who look like journalists, but they're not. Sean Hannity sits at a desk that looks like an anchor would be sitting at, but he doesn't pretend to be a journalist.

He's an opinion guy, right? He doesn't pretend to be a journalist. He and Rachel Maddow and all those opinion people, they sit behind their desk and they got their fucking hair up and they're sitting there like they're reading facts to you. And it's a lot of, it's just conjecture.

And so I don't like the idea, like Kyle's saying, have you been watching Rachel Maddow much? I've been watching more of her stuff yeah on youtube but they're like 18 minutes long or something watching the show and i haven't watched a lot okay she has this formula where she like she lays out all this backstory and build something for like 20 minutes and then like the conclusion seems inescapable. Now, personally, I try to take MSNBC, Huffington Post, Fox News and the Blades or whatever with a grain of salt. CNN, especially lately, I used to argue that CNN wasn't biased.

And then I feel like especially lately when Trump started battling CNN, CNN started becoming, you know, a warring faction of Trump. And, and now they're, that's just who they are, right? They're anti-Trump. Um, but, uh, anyway, yeah, watching her build her story, it's really powerful and she's exploding in popularity. I don't know that it's really honest. Cause I, it's always like, you some obscure cia agent that you've never heard before who met with this guy in like unspecified a stand and you're like okay take that little nugget pick you know put that away and and then before long all these puzzle pieces are put together and it's like well shit like you're making a lot of sense i haven't fact-checked any of this like i don't have the background to dispute a single thing you said

because it's all obscure little pieces. And they all do the bamboozling thing where they'll be like, well, why do you think that health care should be XYZ? Well, first of all, it's undeniable that crime is up in Seattle. Taxes have been raised in Delaware to the point people are furious at the government. I was speaking to someone, and it's like, they say a bunch of things that may be true, but have nothing to do with the point at hand, and then try and get

the other person to either take the bait on one of the points they laid, so that they don't have to talk about the actual thing. It's just annoying to watch. Because it's like a bunch of people talking to each other, acting like everybody watching is a complete retard, where it's like, do you think we don't notice what you're doing, Rachel Maddow? Kellyanne Conway? All of all of you like you sneaky fucks like you don't think we you know you think that we thought wow they she answered that question like wow this is

a big tax relief rachel maddow you fooled us all like you've come out with the golden goose of news stories like yeah rachel maddow doesn't do that she does other stuff but she doesn't i i've never seen her have anyone non-friendly on her show. Her show is an echo chamber. Whereas some of these other guys will at least – like Bill O'Reilly, for example, will love just going head-to-head with someone who disagrees with him. He does seem to enjoy that.

Yeah, and he has a – it's not always substance either, but he has a style that is super hard to beat you know he looms over them yeah he looms over them he'll cut them off if he needs to he's a big guy he's got a booming voice and even stuff like you know okay harley here's the last word go and it's like if you don't have a prepared speech you look like an idiot you Yes. I have nothing. And most people aren't ready. And neither does your party, and let me tell you why. Most people aren't ready. Well, nowadays maybe they are,

but some people weren't ready for it. They looked like fools, and they would lose. If you want to watch good debates online with the news shit, just look up Ben Shapiro. Oh, yes. Ben Shapiro debates. He's very good. Ted Cruz is good, too.

It's fun to watch debates. Ted Cruz, whether or not you hate the guy or not, he's the best debater in our government. A master debater. He's a master debater. But Ben Shapiro's clips. He's a master debater. I love watching him just embarrass people where he's like four legitimate points ahead. And they're like, but, but you know you don't just

want to pay more taxes and help people or something and then he's like well actually oh he's the best I love that guy I can't say I can't say I agree with like a lot of the things that he says Ben Shapiro here I've gone in some

crazy Ben Shapiro rabbit holes before yeah and I definitely disagree with him on a whole bunch of things but he's the only person that has ever said certain things on certain topics where I've been like whoa when you put it

like that like I still disagree cause like and I get to a place where like I'll be in my head I'll be like I disagree because, like, and I get to a place where, like, I'll be in my head. I'll be like, I disagree because in my heart what you're saying feels wrong. But you're the first person that has ever put it into words that it's registering my brain. And he is really good at speaking. And that's a guy that, like, pulls facts out, like, crazy.

Like, I'm always, like, I'll, like, watch, like, one of his things, or I'll listen to him on the background, his little podcast thing there. And I'll just hear something, and I'll go and look at it. I'll be like, I've got to look that up. Is that for real? Just, no, he's a trip. He's a trip and a half. He really grips on both sides.

Really good at tying it back to the holocaust whatever he's talking about a guy who pulls facts out like crazy and he's just fully disappeared is milo and we had milo yiannopoulos on the show so we i don't know did you which episode was it i would remember the number but you could search pk it was a while i was so impressed i was testing i'd be so impressed if you the numbers yeah i should i don't know what episode 226 now yeah yeah i do it's on my screen it is 328 um but yeah so milo got in all that trouble because he kind of said that he had these relationships when like he was is he almost came off pro pedo but from the child's perspective.

He was trying to rationalize some experience he had, gay, sex, when he was a little kid. And everyone in the media power sort of shot fire at him in the same two, three days. And then he just disappeared. Is he being blackballed yeah he had a statement he fought back for a little bit simon simon and schuster said they were going to publish his book and then he's kind of laying low right now i haven't heard i think he found a new wait what happened what did he do okay so here's the deal do you want to go do you want me to go yeah i'd love to tell this um uh he you know he was recounting some experiences from his childhood from when he had an older man who was a priest, and he was like 13 or 14 or something like that.

And he was basically describing pedophilia that had happened to him in sort of a way that was like, hey, I wasn't a victim. That guy taught me to give great head. And that's a common thing that you see in the gay community. You see an older man and a boy and later he tried to be like pull that back a bit and be like boy is just what we call you know a sexual partner who's younger than you you could be a 22 year old boy but he said boy and you left out the the the gang bang right like he said his first experience was a gang bang with a bunch of older black guys and then like you said he had the priest but that was? Like he said, his first experience was a gangbang with a bunch of older black guys. And then like you said, he had the priest, but that was a, uh, he did it many

times and he said, you know, father, whatever taught him to give head. And, um, you know, he just, and he said that he was the sexual predator in that relationship, that he was the one like seducing these older men. And, uh, yeah, he just, and, and then, then like Kyle said, he said that, um, like like not just he said it was common in the gay community but he explained that oftentimes young gay people don't have like a father in their life so there'll be like an older gay man who does accept him for who he is and who does you know like is kind of willing to help him go through this like sexual maturation when their family's not there for them and uh you know

when you lay all that out it really turns into you can paint it as a pro pedo stance and that's what happened to him and um yeah what was that call it three months ago does that sound right well the controversy happened like three months ago or so but he had made those statements uh several times and in varied amounts the Amazing Atheist podcast. I mean, he talked about some of that stuff on our show. He came on here and talked about the gangbang and I think maybe the sex with the priest and stuff like that. He talked about that,

but the instance in which he described it in a light that really got him into trouble happened on a different podcast that he was doing. I don't know if it was his show or who knows. The Drunken Peasants podcast. It was the Amazing Atheist podcast. But it was a late night that he was doing. I don't know if it was his show or... The Drunken Peasants podcast. It was the Amazing Atheist podcast. But it was a late night speaking sort of situation. And got him in a lot of hot water.

Cost him millions of dollars probably and a lot of fame and influence. And it's hard to figure out how much money he's lost from all of this. It's a real shame that he said that. His book is going to sell a fuck ton on Amazon. He'll make a lot of money with that. I have no idea.

It's called Dangerous Faggot. I thought that was the name of his tour. I think the book was too. They were filming a documentary for the tour. I've only gone down a Ben Shapiro hole because i went down a milo hole and the milo hole led to a bench pure hole so my bench for a hole was an extension of

my milo hole and um the only thing that i'm really certain of with that guy is that uh i think that's excellent branding for his tour and i think it's a great name for his book if that should be his name because it made me look at it and i saw a picture of something and i stopped i was like wait a second who's this guy and that was before all the crazy hype and ever all these videos on facebook now i go on facebook i'll see like 15 things you know but it was kind of like this was like 11 months ago he wasn't really doing the rounds a lot. He's got an interesting career. He made his bones as a provocateur, right? And it's interesting.

He just takes whatever side will get people angry on the arguments, which makes me wonder where's the truth. He was definitely for – I think he was for internet censorship or something when it was about gamergate and then he was against it when he became a republican or vice versa like there's definitely some positions that shifted uh whichever one was more favorable to him just like poking at people um and then uh you know he made well you've got the the innate hypocrisy that he's a practicing Catholic with all of the other stuff. Gay and – And not just gay, but like – I'm trying to remember what else.

He's not gay in sort of a Catholic-friendly kind of way. I know that there's a – He's not like the Pope. Yeah, he's not like the kind of gay that the Catholics would want in their church. And gay that the the catholics would want in their church and there are gays that they would want their church he's like crazy like yeah i like to have gang bangs with lots of guys just come everywhere yeah not just guys yeah he's particularly fond of big black men that's his thing dark i do dark is the night and and you know it so i don't know what his real life is like but the way he describes it is you know slutting up new black bulls every night or something you know like that he frames

his whole life in a way that it seems like every one of his things that he likes is almost a get out of jail free card for a different scenario where it would be like you know he talks about how much he only he likes black guys you know and so he has a built-in just card right there so when someone's like you're racist he's like oh no you've never actually seen me dating a black guy but i take my word for it i fucking i only go with black guys you know or it's like hey you're a homophobe ha no i love dick i'm gay there you go i got that card you hate women couldn't possibly. I don't think about them less. I'm gay. You're anti-Semitic. You're anti-Semitic. I'm Jewish.

Yeah, that's one. That's what it is. It seems like everything he says, it's so that he can be ostentatious on some topic and be all flamboyant and then backpedal a bit if it gets a little too real and... You know what he's going to be next

for? Well, i have all of these oh that if he transitioned transitions to a woman we'll know for sure that he's just fucking with us that this is just that we'll know then because because that's got to be what's coming next because if he does that nothing will touch touch him i mean i mean fucking uh uh the kardashians uh mother now like killed that person killed that person in traffic and then transitioned and we were like oh that's cool uh homicide who cares yeah bruce jenner caitlyn jenner no bruce jenner killed someone yeah i was right was it no no it was caitlyn jenner who killed someone i think bruce killing i'm not

sure yeah legally speaking bruce did it. I'm not sure. Legally speaking, Bruce did it because the name hadn't been changed or any of that stuff. Bruce Jenner killed that person and then Caitlyn Jenner had to answer for it. I totally like the idea that the Kardashians were kind of falling off the map a little bit. And then Bruce is like, alright, I'll take one for the team and switched

over and became a girl. He was on that PR call. You want me to do what? Did you watch the Chappelle specials? I haven't watched them yet. He's got a great fucking Bruce Jenner joke. He's talking about...

Don't spoil it. I did not. I stopped. I stopped. They're excellent. Anybody out there who's listening, Stopped. Stopped. Yep. They're excellent. So anybody out there who's listening, if you like Dave Chappelle, or maybe you're just too young to appreciate it,

I'm going to watch one right after this. They're fucking great. I couldn't help but not watch them back to back because one of them finished and I was like, oh shit, that's the last joke. Oh man, that's the last. Nope. Episode two. And that's the last joke? Oh, man, that's the last. Nope. Episode two.

That's cool. Like a good book. It's formatted in episodes, but they're completely separate specials across the country from one another. And the one where he's smoking weed is in Austin. He's in Austin, and he's like, hey, anybody got a smoke? And they throw up cigs, and then he palms the sig and and out comes a joint and he lights it up like it like he's not it's a it's hilarious i am i find my favorite comedians are usually the ones that disappoint me the most like like bill burr and louis ck to me are top of the heap right but when they come out with their next special it's not going to live up to the ones that put them

there you know for me well don't you find louis ck has been delivering quality consistently and like bill burr is like i've always it's like every joke for him like is like this with me um but he if you're into it if you really like him what he does on his facebook is during lots of sporting events, like basketball games and stuff, he streams live. So just put it up next to you while you watch basketball and he'll do the sports casting. And he's pretty good at it.

It's pretty funny and it's really interesting. Mute your TV. Joe Rogan does that. It's excellent. What's that? Joe Rogan does that for the UFC. He's the color guy for a lot of the events, but he does like a companion sort of live podcast thing.

People love it. I don't like it. Bill Burr, like Louis C.K., his most recent two specials, I think, I didn't like as much, but it's only because I liked his earlier ones so much that I held that standard of like, oh, this isn't just going to be funny. This is going to be a hoot. This is going to be the best

fucking thing all year. I'm in the minority. If it depends out, I'm going to pee myself for this one and then it can't be. It was two or three ago. Joe Coy is a better comedian by a factor of ten than Louis C.K. I watched his new special, that Joe Coy guy. He's half Filipino. He's the one that

often mocks his Filipino mother and her English and her cursing and stuff like that he's specials really fucking funny i just louis ck doesn't make me laugh he's just a miserable like maybe he's just he's just old and fat and ugly and pathetic and he has one thing that he's good at and that's being miserable and witty and that's his whole thing it seems to me it's like oh life's awful isn't it yeah and it's like it's not truly like he's not actually like a depressed comic it's like he has a weird kind of arrogance in his depression where it's like i have all the success and i'm still so upset all the time it's because i'm deep and i got shit on my mind like the opposite of that he was so much funnier on ona like eight years ago or whatever it was than he is now in my well i don't

know i i think i would i would i would say that i believe louis ck is the funniest comedian alive right now i would give him that title i uh i think he i think he's hilarious i do agree it's like oh like uh like a tired ass comedian like you know depressed or whatever like i get that angle and how it's always but but his is like it's different it's not it's more like just like real like raw like i love that whole bit he has about his kids and how he's not saving them any money like and he's not keeping any behind for them like that's that's genius that was good i i actually saw him um at the airport in la when i was coming back to canada and he was there with his hat he just had like a hat on and i looked at him and i turned and i saw him and i was like oh shit and he was like he said the same to you you know he just doesn't big mealtime guy and i'm like hey i'm like uh big fan he's like thank you and then he got on the plane and he's actually sitting on

the plane next to that guy sheldon from big bang theory but just to compare i also ran across dave chapelle dave chapelle it was in santa monica about three ago. So he was still off the radar. Like he hadn't returned yet. And I didn't see him. I didn't know he got jacked. So I'm looking at him. He's walking, and it's Dave Chappelle, but he's jacked, and he has headphones on.

But he's staring, and I know it's him. I'm looking at him. I'm like, and he's getting close. I'm like, yeah, like he's just close. And I'm like, yeah, like, he's just close, and I'm like, and he goes like this, he goes, and I'm like, okay. There was tons of people. We were filming and stuff, tons of people around,

and he literally shushed me before I said anything, and I was like, I got you. That's nice. Good for you. I went up full, but no way. I'd be like, Dave Chappelle! Dave Chappelle! I'm Rick James, bitch! I'm going to ruin his fucking day.

Every single thing he hates. I literally thought, the thought that crossed my mind really quick was I was like, I could make him remember me forever, but he will also hate me forever. Yeah, he's going to put me in a bit. It's Dave Chappelle! I'm going to ruin your day, motherfucker! Oh, come here! Let me tell you about high school, when we watched your DVDs over and over.

You'll love it! That, like, just little shushing motion has got to be, like, the best thing to do to someone who recognizes him. Because it's not like a, hey, settle down. It's a thing where it's like, hey, me and you are in on it, bud, for the rest of them. Then in your head, you're like, yeah, just me and my buddy Dave. Keep it a secret for him. See you later.

Dave walks away and you're like, that was fucking Dave Chappelle, man. I tripped out. I was like, yo, he's jacked now. I was like, look, look, that's Dave Chappelle. They're like, that guy? I'm like, he's jacked now. He said sh Dave. I was like hitting people. I'm like, look, look, that's Dave Chappelle. They're like, that guy? I'm like, he's Jack now.

He said shh to me, I swear. They're all like, they see some big dude walking away with beats by a drain. They're like, dude, are you fucking, that's not Dave Chappelle. And they all laugh. Well, you think they all look the same? I met two celebrities, and I fucked up both of them. One was a WWE wrestler, and he was gigantic, enormous. He had long hair, and I don't know my wrestlers enough to know who it was,

but I recognized his name, Brown. It was long, and I think he was bigger than other wrestlers because he was just so big. The Big Show? No, that's not long hair. And the Big Show weighs 500 pounds. I'm not sure. He was gigantic. No, that guy not long hair. The end of the big show weighs 500 pounds. I'm not sure. He was gigantic.

No, that guy's bald too. It doesn't matter. Anyway, so I didn't actually talk to him because I didn't want to be like, Oh, yeah, I love your stuff. What's your name? And the other guy I met, I was at the same baggage claim. He played Jesse in Breaking Bad. What's his name

something aaron paul yeah yeah aaron paul everyone was making a big deal like you know they weren't bothering him they were just like that's it like it was whispering amongst each other pointing to him and uh and i just sort of like noticed him and then didn't bother him it was so cool meeting farva from fucking uh troopers like i was i was like i'm gonna bother this guy like he's not like like when we saw steven seagal that time it was like i'm a little afraid to even excuse me mr seagal sensei seagal like i'm not gonna do that but i was like i gotta talk to farva i was like i told her i was like oh we watched your fucking movies over and over i love that shit when's the next one coming and we talked about

when the next one was coming and everything it was it looks just like he does in the movie it's really cool i was at like the peak of my youtube popularity when i met shack and he was in an mlg event and they were like keeping me away and i i guess i was so arrogant but in my head i'm like you're treating me like everyone else because at an mlg event in like 2012 i am a pretty big deal too right not everywhere but in an mlg event in 2012 i am woody's gamer tag and uh and the fact that like i that didn't let me like getting close to shack i didn't like throw a tantrum or anything uh like optic hex did but um oh yeah he did that's funny he did no tantrum is totally overstating it but he uh he really felt entitled to to like go see up shack up close

and be cool with it and stuff but um definitely not a tantrum. It was just like, I guess he was saying the things I was thinking. Like, hey, bro. Like, you know, this is an MLG event. I'm a big deal here. Shaq doesn't want to meet me? Yeah, right? That's why what you got to do is

you should have rolled up to that place with your own security so you get closer to Sha shock and your security is like, excuse me, please. Excuse me. We have a path here for Mr. Gamer tag.

Dude, I was, so I had a meal. Could you, there was a halo player named pistola. And, um, of all the halo players,

he was the one that I liked the most. I don't know, just his... He was really good at the game. And he had this young kind of nice vibe about him. And so young, almost like he's on a ride of his life. And I just really liked him. And

Hex, when he introduced me to Pistola, he did a secret handshake with him. He was like, ah, Pistola. And there were no sound effects. Those are just mine. I like those better with those sound effects. And then I met him, and we just did a regular handshake, and I felt like putting him in my place. But I did meet him, so that was cool.

Anyway, these are probably not great stories, but they were a big deal to me. Yeah, so I met Pistola. You guys want to call it a show yeah um you know what's special tell us it's my first time staying until the end oh tell us where we find you uh something youtube.com slash harley moore i try and put up videos daily YouTube.com Slash Harley Moore I try and put up videos daily YouTube.com slash Epic Mealtime Lots of food And Harley Plays on Instagram, Snapchat

Epic Mealtime on Facebook All that, you know Go check out the Harley ecosystem Links in the description And check out SmartMouth, Squarespace Blue Apron and Lyft As well as Texture, links for all of them down in the description and check out smart mouth square space blue apron and lift as well as texture links for all them down in the description as well pka services i'm sorry say that again find products and or services okay pka episode 328