Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #371

Episode Date: February 2, 2018

This week on PKA, our friend Boogie2988 is back on the show, lighter than ever and the guys talk about his weight loss and his future dating prospects now that he's become recently divorced, Taylor tells us he's apparently got the mouth of a cave man and needs serious work done and then he enlightens us on "Bugchasers", who apparently seek getting AIDS.

PKA, I don't think any of those C words got on. PKA, episode 371 with our guest Boogie2988. Kyle? Boogie. Bye. Couple of sponsors tonight, Dollar Shave Club and Movement Watches. We'll talk about those later on in the show, of course. Links in the description if you just can't wait.

But, yes, we have a little less Boogie than we've ever had on the podcast before, and that is a beautiful thing. Half the that he used to be getting there getting there i just broke the uh 400 pound mark on my doctor scale last week and then broken on my scale here at home which weighs six pounds over so on my doctor scale right now i should be right around 392 it's the first time i've been in the 300s since i was 25 are you eating something right now, Boogie? Mm-hmm.

I'm eating cashews. Got to get my protein in. Sorry about that. Protein. Leave him alone. Just saying. Does it always say like half a cup of water fills you up? So it's like a handful of cashews stuffed?

So here's the trick. All right. How much I can eat at once now is very, very limited. Um, so I will probably be able to eat, uh, I don't know, a handful of cashews right now. Um, and that if I try to eat more than that, I have a chance of throwing it up. If I try to eat more than that, I will get sick. But if I wait 15 minutes, then guess what? I can eat more cashews. And if I try hard enough in a day, I could probably still pack, pack in three, four, five, 6,000 calories. if I just ate every 15, 20 minutes.

But you got to listen. That's good thinking. That's dense. But if you'd listen to your body, and that's the whole point of the surgery is to learn to listen to your body, right? And get a chance to start over. When my body says, hey, we've had enough cashews, then put them up. Take them away.

I have to ask, are those regular cashews, or are they some sort of honey-roasted variety? These are the regular cashews, but they are salted because I like the salted ones. Yeah, salt's fine for you. I discovered that a while back. I debunked the whole salt thing as Dr. Kyle here. Good going, Kyle. It's about time you proved those science-y know-it-alls. F.P.S. Kyle, M.D. Yes, sir. Those science-y know-it-alls show much more. MD.

Yes, sir. I was concerned because my sodium level was always finishing up my day at around two or three times what you're supposed to have. But Kyle reassured me that it's totally fine. There's nothing to be – there's no issue. I won't get high blood pressure. Now he eats nothing but salted beef, and look at him. Look at him. I will tell you that my – you that my salt affects me pretty rough right now, especially with the lymphedema.

The lymphedema is half as small as it used to be. He wants me eating exclusively protein, still 120 grams of protein a day. Don't eat vegetables. Get that stuff from vitamins. I want you eating protein, protein, protein, protein, protein. Lean proteins, ideally. Nuts and beans at the top of the list, and then below that, meats. protein protein protein protein protein lean proteins ideally um nuts uh and uh beans like at the top of the list and then below that meats and then leaner for your food because i never have

it is a very lean meat i think that uh i i think that you would like that a lot it's very i do like it i've had it it's very good oh i'm a big fan it's a little gamey see all right so here's the thing about the gaminess and uh the taste of the venison literally depends on how the deer died. Really? It needs to die quickly. If it dies and if it gets shot and then it runs for 50 yards and its adrenaline is pumping, that's what you're tasting. It gets into the feet. But if you shoot the deer in the heart or you shoot the deer and

people always talk think think you shoot deer in the head for some reason that aren't hunters or anything but you don't you don't do that because if you miss you could like blow its snout off and it's awful yeah it's a terrible way for the heart right like i i'm no few hunters aim for the heart right yeah sort of the shoulder just behind the shoulder blade and a little bit lower the lungs are there and then just below that and kind of forward is the heart game for that area and you know if you're a good shot you can hit whatever you want but yeah you hit them somewhere in there and with a large caliber rifle they drop dead and you don't get that gaminess i should be getting a load of deer meat tomorrow is that really what it is yeah is it like cortisol that you're tasting in the meat or something like

it's all stressed out like oh it's over as it's running so so what you're saying if i'm eating someone's venison and it tastes gamey that just meant they were a lousy fucking shot is that what you're telling me perhaps yeah it was like clipping its hooves off with hedge trimmers you know as it was dying well it's a torture yeah there was this uh there was this place over in tulsa that i used to go to it's like a hunting lodge like restaurant or whatever and they had like a lot of exotic meats i had alligator there fried alligator for the first time they had ostrich meat which is weird because i didn't know that was legal but it was not good i didn't like ostrich um but they had like a venison chili and i would get it every time because it had no gamey taste to it and always leave me wondering

why didn't we domesticate deer like why don't we like domesticate deer and just eat that as one of the meats that we eat i don't know i i guess it's because they're assholes are they yeah i think that's the problem like for something to be domesticatable they can't just be like terrified of everything that's the issue with zebras like you can't ride zebras because they're assholes um zebras are just mean they'll like kick you in the head when you're like can it's like the people who keep like alligators as pets where they're like this is samson i've had him for 20 years and he wouldn't hurt a fly and then like 10 weeks later they're dead because samson got tired of their shit like that's what a zebra did like you know british people went down there and like there's a whole group of horses around

here they look neat let's try that and then they like get a zebra okay and then like two weeks later it kicks reginald right in the fucking temple, and he goes back to England in a body bag. Yeah, cows, dogs, cats, they're not assholes by nature. I don't know if I could ever hunt because, like, one of the things that kept me from getting Eagle Scout, I got Star Scout, but I didn't get Eagle, is I could not do the, I don't know, I can't remember. I guess there's probably a hunting badge, probably, but that was mostly about hunter safety than, like, actual hunting. But there's also, like, a gunsmith badge or a shooting badge. I can't remember. But so they taught me like the easy stuff. I shot a.22 a few times and that was pretty easy.

And then they put a shotgun against my shoulder and I shot it. And I was not ready for the kickback and they didn't even warn me. It was like kind of a prank. Oh, it's his first time shooting a shotgun at skeet, you know. But my anxiety disorder went boom and I just lost it. That was it. I never touched another gun. I've never felt comfortable over anything other than a pellet gun at this point. And so I don't think it's not that I don't have trouble killing an animal. Um, cause I, I, I, you know, I'll do that. Like in 4-H camp when I was a kid, uh, we stayed on, on the 4-H farm for six weeks. And at the beginning of that, uh, that year,

they, they introduced you to this bull and like, Hey is bessie or whatever and you're gonna you're gonna get time with bessie you're gonna clean bessie's pen you're gonna learn bessie's tricks you're gonna see how smart she is i don't know what they named her i don't remember the name but um they're like but you're gonna get to know him really well okay and then you over the six weeks you all got like a couple days with with the animal and then in the fifth week they they're like, all right, everybody come say goodbye to the cow. Because the cow is going to slaughter today. And we're going to be having him for our Friday cookout before everybody goes home. And the point of it is to get you to be fully aware of what farming is and how it works.

And knowing that where your food comes from. And letting you know that cows are intelligent animals. They are relative. I mean, they're pretty fucking dumb, but they're intelligent enough. They're more intelligent than your goldfish. And they can learn tricks and stuff. They can.

They're like dogs. Yes. They're very good tricks. I don't think they're dogs, but my dad's cows will escape every now and then. He's got like 100 acres, and so the perimeter of 100 acres is hard to me it's miles it's miles and and so they'll a limb falls whatever they escape

and the cows are smart enough that when you drive around and like find them he can yell at them go back home and they'll all literally i swear to god go back home and they'll all literally, I swear to God, go back home! And they'll all turn around and they'll go all straight back to, you know, half a mile and right through the hole in the fence that they had escaped from. They're fairly intelligent. They're kind of assholes. I don't know why I think it's okay to eat cow and I

don't feel like it's okay to eat dog. I don't know why I feel that way, but it's just who I am. I would not eat my dog, you know, for sure. What kind of dog is it? He's like a mixed breed little thing. He's a small dog. I'd totally eat that thing.

He's one of those dogs that looks like he's in a perpetual state of panic. Oh, he is. He really is, too. He just constantly barks at the front door. Push my eye back into my skull, Boogie. Can you see his stupid little... Use your knuckle. Yeah, that's exactly what it's like.

Look at his stupid little eyes. I love them. Boogie, I got a question. The elephant in the room. Oh, yeah. That used to be me. Bariatric surgery and divorce have a high correlation. Yes, it does. And I had no idea that was something I learned recently. 85% of marriages, they tell you this in the class, 85% of marriages fail within two years after gastric bypass bariatric surgery, something to that effect. And there's a lot of different reasons.

If you look at the research, sometimes it's the person who gets the surgery, they think they're better than their significant other afterwards, so they go and move on. Sometimes the significant other feels insecure and thinks, oh, well, this person doesn't want to be with me anymore, so they preemptively move on. Sometimes the person who was the person not getting the surgery was forced into some sort of caretaker role, and that killed the marriage, and that is part of what killed ours, I think. This is the caretaker post and that killed the marriage. And that is part of what killed ours, I think. Um, and then caretaker post-surgery that role, right, right. The caretaker post-surgery is like, well, what's my role in this marriage now? What am I supposed to do? And so like you, you read the resources and I was reading the resources, like, you know, there's going to be a huge redefinition of the marriage afterwards. And you've got to figure out what you want that redefinition to be. And it looks like my ex-wife wanted the, the redefinition to be, I don't want to be here wanted the the redefinition to be i don't want to be here anymore i'm gonna be back home with my family and you know who might you know you can't

say no you're just like all right that's what you want that's what we'll do so like the the caretaker thing is interesting to me because i'm not there but i've always sort of thought she must have been some sort of caretaker while you were at your biggest right i mean you didn't right absolutely absolutely you didn't you know no no we still grocery shopped once a week and i mean i was still i'm wrong i was still pretty active but there was weighing over 500 pounds is kind of being handicapped oh it's straight up yeah it's straight up i was a prisoner in my own fucking body dude was miserable you know i was almost 600 forget 500 i was over 600. I was five, five, seven, six hundred. I'm sorry. Almost six hundred. Five eighty seven is where I was. OK. And but then, you know, I was OK until like thirty

five. But then the back went and then the knees went and then everything else went and my body just couldn't do it anymore. Then my T levels went crazy. And even with testosterone supplements, there's only so much of those can do. So I'm able to maintain muscle, but I'm not really able to build muscle and I'm in chronic pain all the time. And so, yeah, there's a point where during the last year prior to the surgery, that woman was, you know, having to do everything around the house. She was the man and the woman of the house.

I concentrated on my job and my job only. And she allowed, you know, everything else to be taken care of. There was a chore to do and there was a bill to be paid. It was entirely her job, right? And then there, you know, I mean, to get like really into the graphic details of it, um, you know, there were periods of time where she was my physical caretaker as well, changing wounds and, and, and are changing, you know, dressing on wounds and, and literally helping me from one end of the house on the other on a really particularly painful day or helping me fly to VidCon, you know, that would involve pushing a wheelchair at points, you know?

And so she was very, very much a caretaker and a very, very good caretaker at that. And then post-surgery, she was still the caretaker, but somehow that role wasn't the same to her. It began to diminish. But I'm going to be, there's only so much I'm allowed to say because in my mediation, there's like, you know, a non-disparage clause, which I asked for that she didn't ask for, I asked for it. But that said, I don't want to be very respectful regardless of anything like that. But that said, that strain has always been my anxiety disorder. That strain has always been my depression. And it just, you know, we never really learned how to deal with

it the way that a couple that's going to be successful in that situation will learn to deal with it, you know, and I can blame her. I can blame me. I think we're both at blame. That's how we both feel about it. And it just kind of like, you know, there was work I needed to do. There's work she needed to do. We didn't both do the work. We, we both had, we both did a lot of great stuff, but we did a lot, made a lot of mistakes. At the end of the day, I think she just decided she didn't want to be married to someone who was broken anymore. And she missed her family and she wanted to be with them. And I think that's okay. You know, um, did you start like kind of exhibiting, like maybe distance when you were saying, I'm going to get this surgery, like it's set in stone, we're doing

it. Cause that was kind of an on the horizon thing of, Oh, I'm not going to be as needed. No, not really. So surprisingly it wasn't until a post surgery area where I think she realized that I was going to be okay without her, that she really, really started considering the idea. I think prior to that, um, I think for the most part, she was dedicated to the long haul and, things. You know, it's really hard. Like, I'm only a few months out of it now. I knew that the marriage was over in October. My audience didn't know the marriage was over until December. Yeah.

Or maybe November. When did you get the surgery? I got the surgery in August. So, and honestly, there was plenty of signs prior to that, almost two years prior to that, that we were struggling, we were having issues, and we were trying to do the work to keep everything working, you know. But what it really came down to, I think there was one night that I kind of talked about it on live stream, like I had a nervous breakdown. And, you know, my ex-wife talks to me, she's like, Steve, you got nothing to worry about, everything's gonna be okay, I don't know why, you know, you

know. But at the end of the day, it turned out to be, I guess, what she was really thinking. So, who knows? It's really hard to dissect it at this point. And it's going to take me years of therapy to fully dissect it. Right. Um, at the end of the day, this is where I'm at with it though. Um, I'm angry because it's hard not to be angry. I think when something you worked on for seven years fails, right. And I'm sad because it's hard to, to not be sad after seven years worth of, uh, a failure, but I've always been someone who tries to focus on the positive rather than the negative. Um, so me and her still talk as friends. We're keeping it as friendly as humanly possible. She's dealing with her new

shit. I'm dealing with my new shit. She's dealing with her old shit. I'm dealing with my old shit and we help each other out in that respect. Um, but I, I, there's a lot of really good things in my life right now. Things I not comfortable talking about and things that I am comfortable talking about. But whether it's just like being able to get up and walk and stand on my feet for 10 or 15 minutes, right, or to be able to exercise or to be able to go to a store and look at all the collectibles or hang out at GameStop for 20 minutes and talk to the manager there for a while or go to a restaurant and sit in a booth or, you know, like just go walk a little bit down on Dixon street or go to a movie theater without feeling like I'm in a miserable pain or, you know, buying a brand new wardrobe or digging out clothes that I, I stopped wearing a decade ago because they didn't fit in them and start putting those shirts on or finally putting on all those Luke crate shirts they sent me over the years and, and just like me making

new friends and meeting new people and going new places. And I'm just trying to concentrate on that. Yeah, that's one of those things that people don't realize is like when you're big, you can't sit in a booth. Whenever I'm with someone who's heavy, and I always make sure that I'm the first one into the restaurant. So when the waiter asks like table or booth, I can like say table. So there's no like, it's not on them at all. And there's no moment of embarrassment for them. That happened like,'t know a few weeks ago i was with uh i won't say who i was with i was with somebody who was heavy and their wife was even heavier than they were

and i knew going in i was like these people cannot fit in this booth i was like i'm gonna i'm gonna this is a table couple i'm gonna head this off of the past make sure there's no because like i've done that before where like i've gotten into the restaurant first and i'm Table couple. Right, right. I'm going to head this off of the past, make sure there's no moment of embarrassment. That's one of those things that I never even considered. Because, like, I've done that before where, like, I've gotten into the restaurant first, and I'm with a heavy friend. And they're like, table or booth? And I always say booth because booths are more comfortable. And I just think, I like sitting on the cushion instead of the hard carved out wood.

And so then, like, I'll slide in. And then you notice, like, the stomach or if they're a woman, like, the boob imprint of, like, the table. Like, they're having to, like, slide in tight like a credit card what's it like leading into the separation i will tell you well hold on before you do let me answer the question so about two weeks ago or maybe a month ago i guess is closer um i'm out at uh luerta with a new friend and my roommate and uh the new friend doesn't really know much about, uh, like me yet.

They're just getting to know me. And they're like, Hey, we would like a booth, please. And I'm like, no, no,

no. Well, why not try it? Right? Like who cares? Right. I don't embarrass myself, but let's see.

And so for the first time ever in that restaurant, this restaurant that's been there for 20 years, I've been in favor for 20 years. I've eaten there for 20 years. The first time I slid right into a booth and took a photo or whatever what kind of restaurant was it a little mexican place which is really awesome because you're boogie but it like fajitas are going to lose money on this fajitas are like a perfect option because you can box 75 of it up right there right

and then just eat the just eat the meat right and i'll have a little bit of cheese on it too i'm not perfect but yeah i'll put a little bit of a little queso on it or whatever and then that goes down and then i get three more meals out of it when i get home you know i used to order the double the double wide fucking fajitas and eat them there and now i'm just like oh yeah could you box 75 up and i'll take a quarter of it for here and they're like like, really? And I'm like, yep. So I've been trying to get in. Leading into the separation back when we were on that,

was it like fighting or just distance and like ghosting? You know, we never ghosted and we never fought that much about it. You know, my ex went home for a week, uh, well about five days, honestly, uh, to visit family and to help out up there. And then she came home and, uh, she was a little distant, but maybe like 10%, 5%, 10% for about a week. And eventually I'm like, are we okay here? Or like what's going on? And she's like, it's going to be honest with you. Um, I've been thinking about going back home and I'm like, yep. All right. Well, we can schedule that. Let's just schedule that. You want to spend a couple more weeks up there. That's fine. I did really well with that last week. And I was afraid at the time I may major focus of that five days she was gone

was I was just not recovered enough from the surgery yet. I was still having trouble walking. I was still in trouble standing. I didn't, I didn't think I was gonna be able to take care of the house. I didn't think I was gonna be able to care of the, take care of the dog, but it was like an emergency situation. She had to go I was going to be able to take care of the house. I didn't think I was going to be able to take care of the dog. But it was like an emergency situation. She had to go home. And then I'm like, well, when are you thinking? She goes, I'd like it to be kind of like a trial separation kind of thing.

And I'm like, oh, okay. So are you, I mean, are we working? That wasn't out of the blue. You said there were two years leading into this that. Right, right, right. But I mean, there were two years that we were like um arguing from time to time and probably more than a couple should um but nothing like there was never any distance like i i feel like we were in love the last day that we were together um the last day before the the real separation in november as we were the day we met. It just didn't work.

That was the thing. It just didn't work. You know? And I think that's the hardest part about it is just to say, you know, we really genuinely care about each other and we probably always will. It just doesn't work. You know? And that sucks. That sucks, man.

But that's where it was. Like Patrice O'Neill, like years ago in one of his ona clips he'd always talk about relationships and shit and like he said something that was listening to it recently and like it resonated with me a little bit where he was like man if you're if you're single or i'm sorry if you're in a relationship and there's no kids involved like there's no excuse to be having a bad time like if you're having a bad time in a relationship and there are no kids involved that you need to stay together for then like what are you doing you're wasting time but like in the moment it can be so hard to see through that because of course you have like fears of like oh what if you know i don't find somebody else or what if this really

is the thing and we're just we're one hump away from the green pastures you know we're one more argument away from the the good times where we all see eye to eye but right right i think that's a really wise thing. Damn shame. It is. It is. I mean, yeah, Patrice Neal is amazing. And any relationship ending sucks sometimes, but I mean, especially when you put that kind of time into it and that kind of effort into it that we'd put in,

but there's a certain point where you just reach you don't want to put more good money after bad, right? There's a time you walk away from the slot machine, right? And I think that's just the point that we got. And now that i was back on my feet and now that i was healthier than i've ever been and more capable than i've ever been i mean you know at the end of the day you can call her every name in the book and people certainly have but um she put up on my shit for seven years and she put up with me in my worst and i wish she could have been around for me at my best because i'm already better right now than i was with the day I met her by a lot physically better mentally better just the better person overall all around and I

wish she was here to enjoy that you know but she doesn't want to be and I don't want her to be now because she doesn't want to be right but um but she carried me to that finish line man straight up to the surgery and post-surgery that month after that surgery I wouldn't do that to a nurse that I paid I wouldn't do that to to uh I wouldn't do that to a fucking murderer i wouldn't make them send them to the misery that we went through that month what if they molested a bunch of gymnasts well then i wouldn't want i wouldn't want him changing my wounds probably but let's stab that he is he is a doctor trained in sports medicine so he's going to be good at this. Wow.

Holy crap. The other thing, one more thing I want to say about our whole marriage thing. Everybody has these crazy conspiracy theories. Boogie's lying. He's not telling the truth about what happened. She got blacked. She got cucked. He got cucked.

Even if she did, who cares? Right? But there's no truth to any of that. We were literally together 24 hours a day. There was no opportunity for her until she went home. And there's nobody up there that she would be interested in. I don't think that's a conspiracy theory. I think that's just people trying to get a rise out of you.

That's probably it. And I guess I'm giving them what they want right now. But it's one of those things that it does get a rise out of me because it's so factually inaccurate. That's the best way to get a rise out of somebody. Really, because – but I forget who it was. I think it was WhatTheBuck, Buck from YouTube. I forget his actual name, but WhatTheBuck was a TV show on YouTube. And he said, sometimes you just have to let people be wrong about you, and I'm learning that, but it's hard.

Sometimes you just have to let people be wrong about you, and I'm learning that, but it's hard. It's hard to not want to correct them and say, of course, none of those things. One of the theories that came out after a while was, oh, I'm a woman beater, and I must have beat Dez and tortured Dez every day. I'm like, no, it was tough living with somebody like that. Like she couldn't run away.

Like she can't dial 911 for fuck's sakes, right? This stuff is so easy to see when you're not in the driver's seat. I'm looking at this, and I'm like, duh. I totally got this image of Jabba the Hutt with Slave Leia. Right, right, right. Oh, I had something about the, like a question from back when you were at your heaviness, like almost 600. You said you used to go to that Mexican place and get, you said, a double-wide fajitas.

I'm not even familiar with... I didn't know that was an option. Well, that's fajitas for two. Is that a term for heavy people when they mean I'm ordering two entrees? Well, I called it double-wide, but they just would have fajitas set up for two at most Mexican restaurants, right?

So you split them. So I'll get the fajitas. When you're sitting there... Real quick, Kyle. Go ahead like when you're eating there is there like a feeling of like oh everybody's looking at me or because that's like your escape like the food are you just like i don't fucking care like this is i'm eating i'm loving this look at in the 90s i see really when i see really heavy people eating out well obviously i have an anxiety disorder, so I was always very, very aware and probably too aware that people were staring at me.

But, yeah, back in the 90s, it was just like, oh, my God. Because I was like the one fat guy in northwest Arkansas, right? And I was certainly the fattest guy. Like, there was nobody like 500 pounds walking around here. I was the 500-pound guy. You were a one-percenter. Mm-hmm. Fattest guy in northwest Arkansas. now now thanks like jeffy peanut

butter and the shit we're feeding our kids right and like just you know and like sugar getting put in everything i'm not even the fattest dude most of the time before the surgery there's like generally at least two or three just big big people at every restaurant i go to anymore and i never felt self-conscious um but in the 90s it was bad people would just be like waiters would say to me it's like are you sure that's what you want to order i'm like yeah i'm straight up sure i'm trying to kill myself right now motherfucker give me my fucking food right you ain't my doctor you're my fucking waiter now help me kill myself you bitch you know the family fajitas and six six margaritas extra sugar on the rim really okay

and can you put sugar on the fajitas please yeah because they're just not sweet enough i love them kind of fajitas did you get because i like to get the texas fajitas which have shrimp chicken and steak right around here they call them fajitas palisco and they're also with a tomato so i'll get extra tomato uh no uh no bell pepper and it's amazing so it's onion tomato shrimp chicken pepper or shrimp chicken and uh beef i really like uh i really like fajitas i always make them give me like extra rice i like the fixings like the stuff you put on the fajitas like as much as the meat so i i you know i i really go to town i can't really do rice right now because rice expands in your stomach a little bit so it's very uncomfortable and i hate rice anyway

so i just get the extra beans for the extra protein so i'm just like protein protein and protein yeah i uh i moved to atlanta recently so there's tons of delivery food out here oh that is a real i can see how like you could get absolutely obese with delivery food because, like, first, they're a phone call away. And there's a Chinese restaurant so close to me. And I know people are listening to this and, like, yeah, that's what it's like to live in a city. But, like, I've never had this experience unless I'm traveling. Like, I've done a lot of traveling. And whenever I did, I was like, everybody wants to go out.

And I'm like, no, let's get delivery. They're just going to bring it to us. Right, right. It's gold. And so, like, you know, I pick up my phone, and it's like, hello, how can I help you? And I'm like, fucking delivery, bitch. And she's over here in literally 12 minutes with my General Tso's chicken. I love it.

I love it so much. I like how entertained you are by... Because it happened when me, you, and Chiz were in Denver, too, where you were like, unlike the ride back there, you're like, oh, and remember last year, Chiz, when we ordered five Grubhubs in one night, and Chiz is from

California, in a city, and Chiz, it didn't tamp his excitement down one bit. He's like, yeah, I can't wait. I'm going to get this and that and the other thing. And it was just baffling to see. And you're going to hit a wall, Kyle, where you won't want to do that anymore. And I have to know, don't you? Because I'll get Grubhub occasionally.

But don't you feel like a bum when you're like, oh, yeah, this is only like two miles away. I could drive there or walk there or whatever and get it and save the 30 premium i'm paying on this fucking burger it's really not that much of a premium oh it depends like if you use a service it is like with some services it's like six dollars and then a tip right but i'm just calling a chinese restaurant excuse me i'm just calling a chinese restaurant so you know you just tip them and they bring it over here i give them five bucks and you know i usually get like i order enough food that i can eat all day like i i order a double wide chinese meal i get nice chicken double wide dinner rice get a couple of soups get some wontons about four spring rolls then i get the garlic pepper

chicken i've had so much chinese food today i've had enough Chinese food today to kill a Chinaman. It's delicious. I fucking love this shit. Oh, so you're off of your Indian food kick. Well, there's no Indian food in this. So I was originally, we first moved out here and we were in a rental place until the sale went through on the new house. And that place was in a much

that area had a lot more delivery. But this place is, it's pretty limited. It's pizza or Chinese. So it's been Chinese for several days now. I really enjoy delivery food. Do you have to eat by yourself? Or any of you?

Do you ever do that? I fucking hate eating alone, man. I won't do that to save my life. Oh, yeah, I have no problem with eating alone. I have no problem either. But to what Boogie was saying with those giant fajita things, Chiz put sushi for two in the comments, and it made me think the times I have gone out to eat

and gotten a little embarrassed are when I go to a sushi place, and I'm like, oh, the triple sashimi? That's great. I'm going to get that. And then it takes two frail Asian women to carry this replica boat over to my tray. And they put it there. And then it's like, oh, now I look like a fool. There's a sail on this.

Like, just like right in the middle of here. I love it. I don't know if Woody's familiar. I'll just get on this plane. Take the boat. I'm sorry. That'll actually give me half chub when there's like, they need two or three people to bring out my food.

I used to be like, oh, God, I am a fat fuck. And I love it. Someone made the right decision. So don't think woody likes sushi so maybe he's not aware but like you can you can order this thing called a sushi boat and it's a common thing at lots of sushi restaurants and they literally bring it out in a in a in like a miniature boat it's wonderful it's wonderful it is festive i'm googling it right now. When you're alone, it's not fun to have a giant, you know,

schooner in front of you that you're picking off bits of fish. They hit the gong. Gong! Sushi boat for one! We have a sushi challenger! Sushi challenger!

We have a sushi challenge! There was a place when I was dating this girl out of Memphis and it was like an all-you-can-eat Japanese slash Chinese restaurant, which is cool because I've never had all-you-can-eat Japanese. And so they did all-you-can-eat sushi there, fresh

made rolls, but it was like 25 bucks to walk to the front door but it was worth it like every time right and just whatever you wanted him to make you you can invent your own shit um and and i got to know that guy by name that like sushi chef or whatever oh mr william oh you're very happy i'm like yeah i'm very happy it's like you want regular i'm like no let's change it up today man i want you put some spicy mustard on some weird shit what you got back there you go oh okay let's do the octopus man it was great just like every day but i would not even look at the buffet i would just walk right past all that shitty chinese food

right and just walk right up to him and i'm like all right we're gonna start with four rolls keep them coming yeah oh i rather mr steven he eat all the fish that are not going to be good tomorrow. Save us so much on the turnover. Yeah, when he comes. I think the other reason he liked me is because I was the only person to ever put anything in that little tip jar he had up there too. I like those guys. I like anywhere where there's... I like authenticity. You know, right? I remember going to this Mexican restaurant

and they had all black people working there. I was like, I have no issue with the black people making my food, of course. But that's not what they do. That's not what they do best. If they were making

some homestyle food or something, I'd totally be up for it. I want a Japanese man making my sushi. At the grocery store here, there are two Japanese ladies behind the counter making those fucking rolls and cutting the fish up right there at the grocery store. I love that shit. I like authenticity. Yeah. I totally agree with you.

If I go to a sushi restaurant and it's only white people like i'm gonna question it it's not good it's not the same like you need that feeling of authenticity absolutely it's not racist kyle it's of course not if i start a brazilian barbecue even if i'm the owner i'm not the face of the organization because i'm not brazilian if you were a little more tan i think you you could pass for Brazilian though, right? Yeah, you know what? He's just a tan away. Maybe a big booty. I'll get really tan this summer.

Can we see your booty? Oh, it's fantastic. A bit of his world class. He's got all those kettlebells. He's probably squatting over there. They've got a high quality butt. No, my ass cheeks are not hairy. I don't believe that for one eye.

Not yet. I'm sure later in life it's going to get like, well, the same way that my back isn't hairy. I only have this kind of hair, but I can see the telltale signs of it's coming. What do you mean by this kind of hair? I don't understand. I have not thick hair.

I have very thick chest hair right yeah like like like me compared to you i'm like a prepubescent boy over here like this is all this is all i got and this has developed even more over like the last three years like i'm still going through puberty like i'm i'm you've gotten more chest hair from the age of 28 to 31 yeah of course he'll have more oh yeah yeah i'm like like in a in a post-surgery world i my body's changing in ways i did not know like obviously with like the testosterone i started growing a beard but now it's like thickening up because my face isn't like stretched to its limits and i'm like getting body hair and weird places like arm and leg hair

which i wasn't able to do for a while because the circulation issues uh now i've got a nice little patch on my chest And I never had armpit hair my entire life, which is really weird and now that's starting to come in which is kind of miserable And like stomach hair on like all that weird loose skin now. It's a hairy pile of loose skin So I'm like oh, I don't even want to detach to me anymore. I hate my body right to have the loose skin surgery I Wouldn't if you'd asked me six months ago i think you did ask me six months ago i'm like hell no i don't want to do that um like i don't give a shit it's vanity i don't want to do no vanity thing no it is a medical necessity like if i want to ever screw again if i ever want to jog again if i ever want

to walk long distances again that's just weighing on my knees now i've got a giant meat apron in front of my knees that surgery is a celebration of success right that surgery is something that you earn you know you could you didn't deserve that surgery 150 pounds ago or whatever it was now you're beginning to like that that i that's it's like needing to buy a new wardrobe like that's not a problem that's's an opportunity. That's, that's something that you worked towards that surgery. I will tell you, it's funny because I was talking to a friend the other day and I'm like, I hate the stomach, man. I can't believe it. And they're like, man, that's a badge of honor for you. Like that, you know, don't, don't be embarrassed by that. That

thing used to be filled with fat and now it's an empty sack and like what's the big deal you just move it out of the way to do the stuff you need to do who cares right um and i'm like yeah i guess that's true you know um but it just i don't know made me feel so much better about myself and then you chop it off and that's 23 pounds i made that number So I now hit 392, and my goal weight is to get to 300, and around 300 we'll talk surgery options for weight loss, and they're estimating I'll lose anywhere between 40 to 60 pounds from loose skin removal alone. Sweet.

Yeah. So that's going to be interesting. If you hit 300, you'll hit 250 after a certain point? Right. If I hit 300, I'll probably actually be about 250. That's crazy. So you could get the skin removed. That's obviously what you should do.

Or you could have it fashioned into a kangaroo-style pouch. A scrote coat. Oh, nice. You would make an incision and then rotate and then attach it back to yourself and you'd have storage. Just because he has the skin removed doesn't mean he can't do

things with it. I'm thinking handbag, shoes. You would think at the very least. That's not dark enough. Burn victim, right? Ever had pork skins? Oh, yum. They'll give you a burn victim.

They're going to be like, thank you so much for the donation. Now that he said pork skins, I want to eat my own flesh. Sorry, burn victims. I would totally eat my own flesh. I understand how some people are like, oh my god, cannibalism.

It's such a horrible thing. I could never eat another person. But eating yourself. Right, yeah, that's not a big deal. That's even more fucked up. How do you not see it? Think about it this way, all right? You wouldn't give me a hand job, but you've given yourself many a hand job.

You know, you can't argue with logic. It's science. Okay, so what have you eaten, Kyle? Have you, like, your own secretions? Have you ever eaten your own booger? Oh, no, that's, no. What about your own semen? Nah, I pass on that.

What about you drank your own piss? No, no. All right, then I don't think you've got the balls to eat your own fucking skin. Yeah, right? Those things fall out of you for a reason. But I would eat my own flesh. I would love to watch you slice up a little bit of Kyle Tartar and then eat that. That would be disgusting.

Well, Tartar would be like pureed muscle meat, right? That would be tasty and raw. Tartar would be like raw. Yeah. He's like raw. He's a little bit of raw Kyle. I wouldn't want to be raw because I feel like you got to cook out some of the impurities because i'm full of them oh yeah you're probably a whore like if a cannibal ate you

like rates of diabetes would go up in their tribe uh blood pressure would rise because you're really just an amalgamation of different uh fast foods absolutely that that's that's that's 100 correct yeah i bet i taste terrible I bet I really do I bet my cum tastes really bad too usually I get some poor reports on that I try to drink a lot of pineapple juice if I know for sure I'm going to be

hooking up that night I'll go and buy one of those containers because it's delicious you ever drink pineapple juice Taylor? you want to start about 24 hours before. Oh, okay. I'll keep that in mind. Taylor, have you...

No, I have never drank pineapple juice for that purpose, no. Okay, so... Should I give it a go? The reason I know this is back when I was helping people in the adult industry. You guys know I did the web design

and stuff for those guys. One of the companies was selling this pill that you took, and it was basically just pineapple fiber and stuff with some of the juice still in it or whatever. It dried out, though. And that was designed – or maybe it was a powder. I think it was a powder, actually. But it was designed to make your cum taste better.

And they did really, really well, but they wanted you to take it 24 hours before you were planning to change the effect. I question their science quite frankly. Because here's the scoop. On the negative side, I sometimes have asparagus in my diet. It helps bones heal, and that's a thing. So anyway, if I pee or ejaculate or whatever like three hours after asparagus, it's fine. No odor, no nothing.

Right? It takes like six hours for that to kick in. And then on the other hand, you go like 36 hours and it's kind of worked its way through. So I think there's like a six to 24 hour window where it seems to be getting expelled. But I think that is for urination purposes and not for like creating seminal fluid, which probably has a different rate. You know, that make sense? That makes sense, maybe. I feel like if your cum tastes so bad

that girls are retching, then you need to not look for a... They don't retch. Okay, well, they're not enthused. They just ask for a chaser. If these girls are asking for a little bit of high C or something afterward to get the taste out of their mouth, you probably shouldn't go for a pineapple supplement. You should probably evaluate what you're eating. Taylor's on his high horse.

I really feel like you guys need to run a train on some chick and handle this scientifically. Well, I mean, I'm not opposed as long as I get to be first. Yeah, I don't want to be a test subject. She's going to be drinking it. Does it matter if you're first or second? Like, dating has gotten a lot more complicated now that I'm fucking single. Now I have to stock up on pineapple juice?

God damn, Kyle. What the fuck, man? I found the pill that you were discussing. It's called, I don't know if this is the specific one, but it's called the Pineapple Express, the fastest way to a better taste. And it's on Amazon here. And, well, fuck it.

I'm going to buy it. I'm buying it right now. Someone rated one star on it and said, I just started to take these. Let's see. And they threw a one star. That's so not cool. What a douchebag.

Yeah. Why would anybody ever trust Amazon reviews? Seriously. Either they're bought and paid for or they're just idiots doing stupid shit. I can't believe this showed up broke. Five stars. Oh, this is really good, but the sound wasn't perfect. One star. Fuck you. Sound?

The sound on this fucking laptop wasn't perfect. You bought a laptop for speakers. You're an idiot. Taylor, I was going to buy you a gift the other day. I don't know if you saw on the subreddit, but they linked a... Man, that Coke is making me burp. Well, you're drinking a two liter of it.

Why are you drinking a two liter? Are you trying to get diabetes today? Are you tired of having toes? I mean mean my toes are always all the time he's like what's the point just give it like three stops right back to it yeah just a march around

kind of heavy yeah you just stop the blood back into him and it's all good I saw the someone linked the witch king of Angmar helmet and I was like $80? Fucking great Christmas gift or you know gift. It's not Christmas great Valentine's gift for Taylor. And I let him know I love him.

And so I was getting ready to order it. I do. Oh sweetie. And so that's all I remember from ASL. I love you. And so that's all I remember from ASL. I love you. And so I was ordering it. I was about to get it.

And then I look. It's 7 1⁄2 inches. It's this fucking big. It's so like, you can't wear that. I want you to wear that thing while you're. How fucking funny would it be if you told me, though, that you ordered that for me, and it shows up, and it's like this tall.

Like, it doesn't even fit on my head. It's like the size of a pen. You know, it wasn't cheap because I know you had one and it got damaged or whatever. And I was like, oh, he'd love this. He'd love this shit. I was very upset when I found out. Someone on the subreddit swore up and down that they sent me one to send to you. A whole helmet.

Big thing. And I called that person a liar. I was like you. A whole helmet. Big thing. And I called that person a liar. I was like, that's not true. And by the way, I didn't get it. But he eventually, I'm probably just easily fooled, because that might be a thing, especially in text. But he swore up and down that he did send it to me. I just never got it.

A whole helmet for Taylor. No, this seems like a 9-11 joke, right? Like, Woody's fires don't melt steel helmets. Yeah. Handmade chainmail bikini with small ring beachwear swimsuit sexy bikini. It's a great title.

I'm gonna buy this. I love Amazon. How could that possibly be comfortable on our twat? It's right. Maybe it has skin colored cloth in the. Oh, it does not. It does not.

This is the closest to nudity I've ever seen. And I think she's wearing like pasties or something under that just to keep it a little bit. And they blur it. They do some like Photoshop blurring. Yeah. Yeah. You know what? always, frustratingly, like a Victoria's Secret catalog or something,

there is not one labia outline in that whole thing. They Photoshop everything. They fix it. And that's the sexiest part of underwear. Yep. Yep. Yep. That's why I no longer subscribe.

They took that out. That's why I stopped beating off to Victoria's Secret you guys just didn't keep pace with the other offerings you know that and also the internet has free porn on it that's what I'm getting at I found nudity on Amazon

I'm surprised best day ever look at this here I only mention it because Taylor just mentioned that's the closest. Hey, titties. Don't click that.

I did say it was good. Right? Yeah. I like how the top half of her being naked has nothing to do with... Oh, wait. This is a poster. I thought they were trying to sell that chair at first. The top half of her being naked has nothing to do with... Oh, wait, this is a poster. Well, then I guess it does. I thought they were, like, trying to sell that chair at first. They're trying to sell the cadence.

Oh, that looks comfy. This looks like a shitty chair. Yeah, I don't know. I had to push it with this. That lime green. Hey, they're at the fucking chair company. Sex sells! Sex sells!

Put your leg up there on our fucking... Right, well, what was happening on the photo shoot that day where they're, like, they're shooting this blonde girl who's not, I mean, she's, you know, not in the greatest face. They're going to kill her body. And they're shooting this blonde girl who's not in the greatest face. They're going to kill her body. Get the lime green chair in there. That's what this set really fucking needs. If you scroll down,

customers who viewed this also viewed. There's a lot of naked chicks on Amazon. I'm way ahead of you, buddy. I'm a child, I guess. Yeah, this one is bottomless. Like, what is this? Who is making these posters? This is almost becoming an interesting topic at this point.

Because look at this poster. All right, so if you're on Amazon, the title is Laminated 22 by 16 Poster, colon, Naked Woman with Hot Rod Car. This is a terrible photo. It's a terrible photo. It's a terrible photo. How tall is that woman? Looks like she's 4'11". I like that. Yeah, I like him short. I like that she has red hair, though.

I'm sure redhead's for the win. Check out the one I did. The one I did is a close-up and her legs are spread. She's standing inside a construction area or something. I'm sorry. Look in the background of mine real quick.

There's people back there. There's like soccer practice going on. There's like a regular walking along in some jean shorts. Does she even know about the debauchery over here by this hot rod? Look at this.

Here's another part of the genre of naked woman standing adjacent to chairs. I think this is just random women. Check mine out, though. I really think it's like her boyfriend took this one. Yeah, that's straight up just the black and white photo in a construction outfit. Shania was last seen in the basement of a Home Depot where nothing is true. She's identified by a rose tattoo

on her left arm and a scar on her cheek. It appears to be a Japanese boat above her pussy. Does that say Thailand under the rose? I think that says that. Or Holland? Is that her stripper name? What the hell is going on oh yeah you're right it does say it's uh it's a says thailand and then maybe a i don't know it's a bad tattoo

and then the name of their i guess her name is tina because that's the the tattoo on her arm i know you guys can't see what we're looking at but if you look at the reflection on that gold plated thing you can maybe do your best. There's an extension. She's standing on an extension cord right there. Pardon me, there's two extension cords, a surge protector, and what looks to be a drill laying on its... Oh, no, a flashlight laying on its side.

And the background is very clearly, carefully chosen bits of particle board. Alright, so this... bits of particle board. All right, so this chick is... This one's rough. All right, this one is called laminated 24 by 32 poster, colon, nude pregnant woman on hairdresser's chair.

Oh, that's my genetics. This chick's face is like a... She's a two. I was going to say a three. Because there's no deformity. No deformity! But she's a sexy pregnant chick. This is a good segue.

Taylor, would you fuck a pregnant chick? If you're on Tinder and the chick's like, well, I'm three and a half months pregnant. I've got a belly bump. Is this a would you or would you like to? I don't know the difference.

Yeah, would you do it against your will? Oh, Kyle was saying would you? Yeah, I would if this is some sort of challenge we're proposing. But this would not be a choice of mine, no. So you would be like, she's very hot. She's red-headed. she's redheaded um she's everything

she's like four months pregnant so yes nah you don't have to worry about getting her pregnant that's true but she's already pregnant it depends on how pregnant right well you could milk her i'm sure you've never done that before that'll be fun that's fair enough but i don't think at four months that you can milk them, right? False. Oh, man. You know more than me that... You know what?

That's not enough to balance the scales. Could you milk a cat? It would be neat to milk a cat. Yeah, you can milk a cat. You can milk anything with nipples. Yeah, I'm going to ask why, Kyle. Would you say yes? Yeah, absolutely.

Yeah, I would have sex with a pregnant woman. Absolutely. I would. I don't think I ever. No, I definitely haven't before, at least not knowingly. And certainly not one with like a bump. But, you know, I've seen a lot of that in pornography. And, you know, I didn't get into that.

This is one of the few times I have one up on you guys. I have had sex with a pregnant woman many times. I bet. I bet. It is much like regular sex. After a while, her belly is big, and you sort of hit it from behind on the side, you know, canoe style, spoon style. And, but, yeah. Oh.

You know what's kind of hard to find in porn is a pregnant woman swallowing hmm that would have prevented the situation in the first place because no no no because the baby is imbibing the cum too and and so that seems like really fucked up right i would have never even thought of that that's fine that is fucked up um so i used to in my 20s go to the local strip clubs a lot it's this run really greasy all nude place called like bottoms up here northwest arkansas and uh they generally have like one six dancing there and then like eight ten or eight twos so it's not a fun place to be uh but if you get a hold of that one six for a little while it's it's it's okay but when you're 20 and you're horny and you're miserable it's not a fun place to be. But if you get a hold of that 1-6 for a little while, it's okay.

But when you're 20 and you're horny and you're miserable, it's not that bad of an experience. I would probably not go back there as an adult, but then it was okay. But there was always this one girl there who went by the name of Cricket. That was her stripper name, Cricket. And she was about 4'11", missing a good chunk of her teeth, if I remember correctly, like matted black hair stuck to her face all the time, kind of sunken in eyes. And she was always pregnant.

And when she wasn't pregnant, she wasn't at the club. But once she got pregnant again and she was visible, and when I say visible, I mean she must have weighed 80 pounds. So when she was pregnant, she was up to 90 pounds 10 pounds of that was like baby weight like it was all and you could feel like the baby in her stomach and shit like oh yeah stuff um and feel its legs and stuff right like you could feel like the formed baby when the ninth month when you when she would walk up to you and so literally wasn't even like a baby in the stomach it was like when you vacuum seal your fucking suits. Right, what it felt like, right?

Because she was so fucking tiny. And she would just, she would like lean against you and put like, she would put her stomach against my stomach. And she would just be like, she'd be like, you want a lap dance, honey? I'm like, no, no. Well, I'll just ride you for a couple bucks here. No, just take 10.

Please leave me alone for the rest of the night. She literally made money by people paying her to leave me alone for the rest of the night she literally made money by people paying her to leave them alone oh that's great but it worked man found her little niche so it was like 20 bucks to get in and 10 bucks to get cricket to get out of your lap if you guys want to see the quality uh ladies uh at the bottoms up that he's talking about there's a youtube video called bottoms up girls Girls Dance to Chozo. She get it. I doubt that's the same Bottoms Up, but let's see.

I'd recognize the club. No, this is in St. Pete. I'm searching for Bottoms Up Northwest Arkansas. No. No, all these clubs are too nice. I can't imagine. There's no botulism. I mean, I haven't seen any faces faces but they look better than twos yeah i i've heard from a friend um that that that they do have nicer girls there these days and like

the establishment classed up a little bit but none of the clubs here in north osar because i was asking a friend and and they're just like, no, they're all shitty. You really don't want to go there anymore. What was the racial mixture? Was it more black chicks or more white chicks? Oh, in Northwest Arkansas, it's all white girls. You're generally like one black girl per club, if that. Okay.

I only ask because I'm looking at a video from the one in Jacksonville and it's, it's all been big booties so far. And, and the, the crowd seems to be mostly, uh, black guys too. Wow. So crazy stuff here. So I was, uh, in Memphis, Tennessee, maybe it was Nashville. I can't remember. Um, but I was traveling across country and I got to my hotel way earlier than I planned to. So I'm like, I'll go out and get a little, I have a little bit of fun. Went to a couple of the sex shops in the area just to like, see what was there. Uh, watch some girl like behind a pane of glass for like 10 bucks, you know, play with their vagina or whatever. And then there was a strip club nearby, um, that I saw a billboard for him. Like I'll go to a strip club, you know, get rid of this is

22 year old adventurous boogie, you know? And, uh, so I go in and it turns out it's an all black club, all black customers, all black girls. And I'm the one white guy i go in and it turns out it's an all black club all black customers all black girls and i'm the one white guy that walks in and the bouncer doesn't tell me that so i just like giving my 15 bucks to walk to the front and so i get to the front door and i'm immediately a novelty not only like 450 pounds 500 pounds but then i'm like the one white guy that dared to walk in here and so people are like really friendly super friendly right like southern black people are some of the friendliest people in the world you know and like uh the couple of guys are like hey

you want to drink man i'm like no man it's just i'm buying i'm like i don't drink he's like uh then why are you at a strip club i'm like for the girls man you know so leave me alone and so i get up down on pervert row and uh there's this cute little girl dancing. And I reach into my wallet. I grab a couple of ones and I stand up. And I think it's like going to be every other club experience I've ever had in my life where I just kind of lay the money down and she'll pick it up or maybe she'll lean in on me a little bit or something like that. There she lays down on her back in front of me, puts her pussy directly into my face i'm just standing here with two dollars in my hand and she's like here you know with her pussy right here

and then she's like well give me the money honey i'm like i start to lay it on top of her belly and she like grabs my hand and shoves it into her vagina her bare naked vagina and i'm like hello all right this is not what i was expecting and you could feel wads and wads of cash in there. There's a roll of dimes in here. Is this a silver dollar? It's hard to find those. So then she takes advantage of my leaned over posture and then wraps her legs around the back of my head and then pushes my face into her.

Like an alien. Which I did not necessarily want because I don't know this girl. Where'd you get a pirate coin? I did not necessarily want, because I don't know this girl. Where'd you get a pirate coin? But so then, like, I'm just, I'm like, my anxiety's flaring. I'm like, I did not expect to be touching

a stranger's vagina tonight. That's a Chuck E. Cheese token. I've been at a business for years. I go, like, sit down in this awkward chair that I barely fit in, and then she comes offstage, and she's like, hey, what's the matter, baby? Don't you like to have fun?

I'm like, I love to have fun, but this is... What do you guys do here? She goes, we party here. You want to go backstage and party a little bit? I'm like, what are you offering? I just want to know up front. She goes, are you a cop? I'm like, no, I'm not a fucking cop. Have you seen a 550

pound cop? I know they like donuts, but shit, right? 450 pound cop. She's like donuts but shit right 450 pound cop and she's like no she's like baby whatever you want and i'm like well what are the chairs like back there because honestly i don't even think you could get to my dick right now is because baby i'll try for 50 bucks i'll try whatever you want i'm like you know nah I don't think so. Like, I don't have any problem with sex work or whatever. And I'm like, sex workers, thank you for doing what you do.

You keep very lonely, very unhappy people very happy. And I think that's great, right? They stay off suicide every day. Right, exactly. I mean, you keep doing what you do. But I didn't know how many dick sheets sucked that day, and I did not know that I wanted to be in there, to be honest with you. So I was kind of like, well.

At that point, she'd already given you the chlamydia shuffle. Right, right, right. In for a penny, in for a pound. That's the question now that I'm going back to dating, right? Dating is going to be really complicated because obviously a lot of people know who I am from YouTube, right? Now I'm in this weird melting body, so I have to show that to another person. Right. And like, am I not just better off just like soliciting the, the, the working girls in Vegas or something like just fly out to Vegas every couple of months and just like do, do it there legally. Or maybe,

maybe try to come to an arrangement with somebody in Northwest Arkansas, where it's just like, you know, no strings attached, just have some fun and and because you know i was like one of my friends saying i was like you got to be careful man you know you know you make decent money every girl you know girls are gonna try to get you for your money i'm like okay well i'm just trying to get at them for their pussy right now i don't want to fall in love again dude right i don't i don't want to ever marry again i don't want to move in with a girl. I just want to have fun. Let me pitch this and tell me where you are on this. Should 2018 be the year of the sex worker? And then post-skin surgery, he could be 2019 year of the girlfriend?

What do you think? Huh. Well, Taylor and I are planning on going to Vegas at some point. I've heard about this. It's what your subreddit recommended for me. Yes. And we're thinking about doing a bit of vlogging from there, a bit of live streaming even perhaps,

and maybe even an adult live stream that would be on Chatterbait. We're not going to have sex on camera. Don't get confused. This is going to be more like what Ice Poseidon did. Maybe not even that hardcore. He used a Hitachi on a porn story. Oh, nice. He found this gorgeous porn story.

I mean, she's nine. Very hot chick. And she's trying to get him to fuck her on camera. And he's like, no, I got a girlfriend. Which, admirable of him, to be fair. Right, of course, yeah. Admirable? He was in there using a vibrator on a naked woman. His girlfriend is admirable for him to wait until he was off camera, is what Kyle is saying.

It's all for the memes. I don't think he fucked that chick. She was saying on Twitter that she blew him and going at his girlfriend saying she had done that. But he says all that was fake. And he doesn't seem like the kind of guy to not tell the truth about an embarrassing fact so i i believe him but but yeah that would be interesting if you came along on that trip and uh because because i don't know exactly what we're going to do but one of the events and i've said it a bunch of times but one of the events that i had in mind was maybe doing that thing where you put sushi on a japanese chick but doing that with multiple races and

having some sort of comp eating competition where we eat a bunch of food off of the chicks and get them naked by eating the food. Now, that's the kind of thing that I was thinking of putting on Chatterbait because there's definitely going to be nudity involved, but no sex. That'd be a lot of fun. Right? That'd be a lot of fun. Yeah, I'm down. I may be down. I don't know how good I'd be at traveling by the time you guys go but keep me in mind because

i'd be interested man i i will keep you in mind whenever it happens i will definitely hit you up because i i think i think it's gonna be fun i i i and the subreddit asked this a while back they're like kyle used to say he hated strippers vegas and prostitutes and i'm like i i still do hate strippers prostitutes in vegas like vegas gives me nosebleeds with the dry air. Prostitutes just want your money. Hookers pretend like they like you for money and hookers just fuck you for money. None of those things are appealing. But if you can have fun with it and go into it with that idea of just making a mockery of the situation, I think

it could be very entertaining. So that's the issue. Most people aren't having fun with their hookers and strippers. I think what Ice did with his hookers, he had that big fat hooker spank him and humiliate him on stream, wearing a beard. That's hilarious. Then he had

that other hooker come over and clean his apartment. He's wearing the bathroom. He's like, no, no, no. Just clean up. Sweep it up over there yeah like no sex involved like that shit's funny to people act like ice poseidon's channel isn't good fun but to me where are the victims in that channel he's just i don't see him like talking about people he's not feuding with anybody he's just making content yeah um i like it yeah i think i cannot for the life of me sit through more than 10 seconds of any twitch stream about anything like i've tried before when like kyle or chiz will like link and be like hey check out this twitch stream of this guy he's

doing crazy shit on the streets of chicago or something i'll like click it and if something doesn't happen immediately to draw me in i'm like i'm not gonna watch this guy. He's doing crazy shit on the streets of Chicago or something. I'll click it and if something doesn't happen immediately to draw me in, I'm like, I'm not going to watch this guy. I'd be like, hold on. It was supposed to be set up by now. Give me 15 minutes to poke around on my phone while I listen to the noises of traffic.

It's like, this is, oh my god. I'll just skip the step. Go to YouTube and find animals fighting or people getting assaulted. YouTube is an active activity where Twitch is a passive activity, right? Twitch is something you put on in the background while you're playing a game or fucking around on your phone or texting somewhere or whatever. That's what Twitch is for, right? And so you leave it up and then wait for the crazy shit to happen, right? Twitch is for the people who just like to have noise in the room and then occasionally tune in and pay attention, right?

I want to talk about Ice's – one of his more recent streams in a second. But first, let me give everyone a quick word from Dollar Shave Club. You've heard us talk about the amazing shave we get from our Dollar Shave Club razor, especially when we use it with their Dr. Carver's Shave Butter. Well, I'm here to tell you I'm never giving up my membership. Something heavy just fell on my house. In fact, I'm adding even more Dollar Shave Club products to my daily routine. Dollar Shave Club makes products for your hair, face, skin, shower, everything you need. They have me looking and feeling amazing. And it's all their own, original stuff. They only use the finest premium ingredients, and they deliver it to you,

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dollarshaveclub.com slash pka. That's dollarshaveclub.com slash pka. That's dollarshapeclub.com slash pka. Those one-wipe Charlies are excellent. Those things are really nice. Better than store brand stuff. For those of you, and I know it's probably most of you guys, who've already converted over there through pka, and you're shopping around and looking for stuff,

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I never did help promote it. Yeah, I could have sworn I used that, but it wasn't associated with Dollar Shave Club at the time. It is now. Check it out. And the razors are even better for you now, Boogie, because you've got so much stomach to shave. I know, right?

Oh, chicks dig hair. Oh, they do. Before we talk about ice, let me say, can I change the topic now? Yeah, of course you can. I think my dream situation, we were talking about girls or whatever. I've always followed a lot of e-girls. I've always followed

the high-end ones like Jessica Nigri and stuff like that. I'm sure I know them all. The girls who do like, I don't know, Dee Woody? Not a single one. I don't even know Jessica Nigri. Oh oh she's amazing amazing cosplay girl man she does great stuff um and then like some of the like the newer girls who just like even just do cam shows or whatever i've always followed girls like that and it's because you know i like all of my misconceptions and preconceived

notions about that stuff got evaporated when I worked for people who run adult sites. And sometimes that would just be a girl who's just like doing her own thing, right? She's like, can you design for me? You know, all right, it's 500 bucks. I'll design for you. Send me content. You get to know that person. And then whatever it is you think about girls who strip for a living or girls who do that stuff for a living. When I was going to the strip clubs, I made friends out of strippers, you know, and I've known women that work in the adult industry. So I think the perfect situation for me right now would probably be to find, find one local, good luck with that. Right. But find a local girl who like is kind

of like open-minded and maybe does that kind of work for a living and just wanted to like hang out and just like, maybe like get tips on like how to do YouTube or how to do Twitch or how to do like how to build their business or whatever. And that would be like the thing I would give. And then like, we would just hang out and have fun. I don't even, I'm not even that worried about sex right now. I'm worried about like just taking a pretty girl out to dinner and that kind of thing. Right. Like, wouldn't that be like the perfect situation? But then she would have to be like, I understand that like you have a zero, zero interest in like moving in together. You have a zero interest in like getting married ever again in your life.

This is just like a fun thing we do. That would be like the perfect situation. No, like it wouldn't be illegal. I find it very open. You're not paying her money. You're paying her in opportunity and shout outs and skills. Like, hey, you want to do this? No, no shout outs. Never even shout outs either. I would never do that

because my audience is so toxic and shitty. You know what I'm saying? I would not want to sick those monsters on somebody like that. Kyle, if you had business in Fayetteville, Arkansas, how would you find a prostitute? A local one, Kyle.

Boogie seems to keep implying there aren't any there. Oh no, there's definitely prostitutes. That's not what I want. I don't want a prostitute a local one kyle boogie seems to keep implying there aren't any there but oh no there's definitely prostitutes that's not what i want i don't want a prostitute yeah you know you get prostitutes what do you want yeah i got i'm saying like just like maybe like a girl in the industry you know what i'm saying like maybe somebody like uh does like porn hub for a living or chatterbait for a living or something like that or does like uh you know like wouldn't that be cool that was like an actual person who does porn or like someone who like dresses up like fucking aladdin really slutty and goes to conventions like either i mean that would be pretty great too but then that girl's probably going to be more interested in like a relationship kind of thing and that's what i'm saying i i want

no relationship i want a girl who's like very open-minded who can you know i don't know man like it just seems impossible but if i found that girl I'd be a fool to not like – I mean I bet Kyle has some tips for this. Like I know that Kyle before trotted one out saying ask to take nude pictures of people because taking nude pictures isn't – or maybe I saw that on Cops, but I feel like that was a Kyle thing. Yeah, that's me. So that's how you check to see if someone is a prostitute and not a cop, right? You first offer to pay them for nude photographs, which is – a cop would never do, but it's completely legal. So you can really cut through the weeds or make sure that Johnny Law is not going to come a-knocking. I saw – I forget. It might have been in Raleigh, but I'm a little confused as to where.

The police just changed the rules, making it legal for them to have prostitutes and stuff touch their dick. Weird. They can do hand stuff? I guess they were using it as a cop check. Prostitute hops in the car,

maybe wants to jerk him a couple times. If it's a cop, they'll say no. If it's a John check you know like the prostitute hops in the car maybe wants to jerk him a couple times if it's a cop they'll say no if it's a john they'll say yes yeah you know that's what i always said that's what i always said about you see those videos of like a woman trying to hire a hitman to like kill her husband and and and you know they get there's there's usually a hidden camera video in the cop car whatever when when they're getting caught. And I always say like, the first thing you would ask a hit man is let me see your dick. Cause like I got what it would, would never be like, well,

of course. Or you could just be like, Hey, you know, you're sitting in your dark car in a parking lot. I need you to shoot that guy real quick. So I know you're real. So Kyle. So, okay. Soyle is the implication here that you you have solicited uh prostitution before in a legal sense

so the implication we're going through here i i have um someone else paid for a uh prostitute for me one time um and in texas which i don't believe there's legal prostitution in texas i know so um but um i i'm pretty sure that's the only time i have uh uh hooked up with a prostitute and then there was another girl who um i hooked up with and then the second time i talked about this before and then the second time i was going to hook up with her, I was going to take her on a trip. And, uh, she basically forwarded me, uh,

through a third party, her menu of like, well, you know, it'll cost this much for me to come and it'll come there and it'll cost this much for this kind of sex and this much for that kind of sex. I was like, Whoa,

what the fuck are you? Wow. Prostitute. Like, you know, so that was kind of shocking. So, so I don't know if you i didn't pay

or anything we just right or whatever so never in my life have i paid a woman for sexual favors and i don't think i would ever do that obviously because it's illegal in the area that i live in right yeah but then on top of that i don't know if that's something i would ever be comfortable doing um even like at a point where i'm just like, I don't ever want to have an emotional connection with a woman again in my life. I don't know that that's something I would ever feel comfortable doing. So I was wondering, I was wondering if anybody here has, and if so, like what, what's my hangup? Because I have no problem with it. Like you guys are fucking prostitutes every day. So your visitors or your listeners right now are just like, Oh, I do that book. Hey, do that. Right. It's good for you.

It's good for the girl. She's making money. You've got money to spend. You get what you need. They get what they need. I'm all about sex works. I think it's the best thing in the world. You pay a girl to send you cosplay photos every month. Do it. You pay a girl to masturbate on Chatterbait or Skype for you. Do it. You pay a girl to come over and blow you. Do it, man. I don't know, right? And I see like no real harm in it. The real harm in it is keeping it illegal because now it's an underground operation so now she's got to deal with prostitutes now she's got to be unsafe she can't do it in a known well-lit place she's got to do it in secret scary houses and shit right scary dudes right but if when it's all legal man you can make them get an sdd check you can get an

sdd check you know what i'm saying like the whole nine yards when when the the porn industry is doing it the reason i think porn is so much better than prostitution is because the girls are getting SDD checks. The guys are getting SDD checks. You know what I'm saying? And like, you know, everybody's safe and you know, everybody's clean and you, you know, but prostitution is unregulated. I think that's awful.

That's why I wish it was legal, you know? But I, but at the end of the day, even if it wasn't legal, I don't know that I could, I don't know that I could ever do it. just seems it was uh like for most guys like when you're doing that a huge concern is how much fun your partner's having because if your partner's not having fun then you're not going to be able to enjoy it because you're going to feel like oh well this is basically just kind of it feels like maintenance or something or they're just they're clearly just doing this because I gave them however much a prostitute costs. And it's clearly

they're just thinking about their next appointment. Prostitutes are all kinds of different prices. The ones that we associated with in Texas were like $200.

Is that high? Is that low? I'm pretty sure that's low. It's pretty low, I think, for what we did and all. There were two of them, and I got my pick of the litter. I think I took the blonde, if I remember correctly. It's kind of hard to remember. I'm not going to retell the whole story, but that's the time when she had a diaphragm holding back her period, and she had a diaphragm holding back her period. And I knocked the diaphragm loose. And I was like, wow, she's so wet.

And then I looked, and there's just blood everywhere. Like you had slaughtered a pig in the bed, and the sheets were ruined, and I was covered in blood. And it wasn't nosebleed blood. It was backed up period blood. It was, but it wasn't terrible. It was backed up period blood. It was, but it wasn't terrible. Dark and viscous. You know, maybe the friction had broken up

the clots. I don't know. But it didn't seem to be gross. Yeah, right? She was mortified. I think if her attitude had been like, eh, you know, no big deal, like if she had been a low-class cunt about it,

I would have been disgusted. But because she was so embarrassed by it, I sort of took like a completely... I reacted in a completely different way. I was like joking about it, being really lighthearted about it. I was like, ah, we're blood brothers now. You're totally right because like if she had responded like oh that's the way she goes like you would be like so this is a

regular occurrence then okay so i'm not the first one to be you know going in and out of you know this scarlet cavern of potential disease like you know you wouldn't want that but if she goes oh my goodness i'm so embarrassed then it like lets you know oh okay this is very unusual and she's not just like oh blew an o-ring again like let's go back to my fucking pimp mechanic and and maybe i'm just naive here but i was just really confident that she wasn't gonna have any stds or anything she maybe wear a condom when she blew me which was just the most the lamest thing ever it's the lamest thing ever i was having such a hard time like like staying hard uh she she was like it's impossible it's gonna get harder than this and i'm just like i don't know let let me let me focus really hard

and you keep going like i had to like do some vulcan mind trick to get a direction. Do you remember Stretch Armstrong? You remember that? You'd have to try and grab the base of his arm and cinch it up tight to get all the beads and sand up in to keep the end stiff. That's what it's like in a condom where you're just pushing rope.

It's not working right. It's the worst. It's a terrible invention. I can't believe they haven't come up with something better. Birth's not working right. It's the worst. It's a terrible invention. I can't believe they haven't come up with something better. I mean, birth control, I guess. That's much of, and like those IUDs. Yeah, but they don't protect you. They're not protecting the guy.

You know, there's nothing to protect us that works anywhere. Oh, I was just talking about like a pregnancy thing. But you're right. Condoms, like you definitely don't want your dick in the mouth of someone who sucks dicks for a living. I bought condoms today. It was funny. When we left that rental house, I left my whole box of condoms. And I buy quite a few at a time. I get the big box. And I was like, as we're driving away, I'm like, oh, I left like 30 fucking condoms in the bedroom drawer thing, nightstand. And so I had to go buy condoms today.

What's your condom of choice? I honestly don't care. I honestly really don't care that much. I like Lifestyle Skin, S-K-Y-N, I think is the brand. I think they're latex-free, which can be a concern with some girls, and

it doesn't matter to me either way. Some girls are allergic to latex, which it can be a concern with some girls and it doesn't matter to me either way so you know some girls are allergic to latex and so i i try to like be a crowd pleaser um and but but you know i never go for the sheep intestine you know i saw that today when i was buying the new ones and i thought about getting them um but you know i i i didn't i i got a a box of i i think i got what are they called natural lamb natural lamb yeah i think i got trojans today that they're like lubricated trojans or something there's some fucking dude in scotland like right now like the family owner of natural lamb or whatever it is he's like i can't believe we're still in business with this. It's been 2,000 years. Latex is much better. People are fucking with the insides of Charlotte over there.

Yeah, it's bizarre. It's a little, you know, I mean, think about, you've probably eaten like a bratwurst or something that had like a pig intestine skin on it, right? But you ate it. Yum. I eat tons of things that I wouldn't want to have sex with or fuck or put my dick around.

See, that's a rule. I'll only eat something if I'm willing to fuck it. Wow. Interesting rule. Phrases I never thought I would hear until I came on PKA. I want Woody to would hear until I came on PKA. I want Woody to come back because I got a really good Wings video

and before anyone gets upset, it's a funny Wings video because Boogie was talking about dating and so Wings has, there's this video of Wings, I don't know how old it is, maybe it's like brand new, maybe it's years old, but it's wings uh reading this email that he got from a prospective um

date girl from some like overweight dating site uh that he was on it is hilarious it is really funny he reads the whole email and it's definitely worth a watch. Plenty of manatees in the sea. Oh my god. It's really really funny. There's no such thing as an overweight dating site, is there? Yeah, of course. Of course there is.

I don't know because there's Farmers Only and then there's Black People Meet. You don't have to be lonely at FarmersOnly.com You ever heard that jingle? Oh, I've heard it. Oh, it gets stuck in your head. It's like the, you ever heard this one?

1-877-CARS-FOR-KIDS Donate your car today. They get stuck in your head and they never leave. If you ever come across the child that sang the 1-877-CARS-FOR-KIDS I'm going to punch that kid in the throat get stuck in your head if i ever come across the child that sang the 1877 cars for kids i'm gonna i'm gonna punch that kid in the throat as hard as i can if that kid puts me in a self-defense situation with cars for kids i'm gonna i'm gonna beat him to death i i hate that that little jingle

so so much when it comes on i literally change the channel it's so much. When it comes on, I literally change the channel. It's so fucking annoying, and it gets stuck in your head, and you just can't go anymore. Everybody's seeing it. So Wings, I don't know. He made sort of more of a negative video today, sort of calling us out, or me and the show, for not paying him his lump sum.

Also the subreddit and the mods of the subreddit and um i think call them degenerates or something like that i don't want to misquote him but but you know i i asked on the subreddit i'm like so i should ignore this right and let like i i'm not we're not going to watch the video that he uploaded we're not going to We're not going to watch the video that he uploaded. We're not going to trash Wings at all. We're also clearly not going to ignore it. Well, because, because, like, here's the response I've got.

It's like, nah, rip into him. By the way, this is an hour old. I posted this an hour ago. In one hour, these are the responses. Nah, rip into him. 19 points. No, what the fuck? And you claim to Nah. Rip into him. 19 points. No. What the fuck? And you claim to be a rape squad killer? 11 points.

I mean, eh, probably, but then again, fuck him. It'll be funny, dude. Of course you shouldn't. This video needs to be dissected and discussed fully. 7 points. It's not him. It's the blood sugar. 6 points. Tear him to shreds kyle he gave

a lot of material for this also try and find what wings uh to this bad grammar trying to basically saying try to find the video of wings reacting to arian um foster's sympathy for him. And then three people disagreed. They said, yeah, you should ignore it. This guy, this guy says something about, oh, no, this is sort of a mixed one. He says, do whatever you want.

Just lay off the sociopathic I like to see a grown man cry shit. Fair enough. Let's not do two weeks in a row of that. I can agree with that. But yeah, we're not going to watch that one. No need to. What did I come back to?

You did want to watch something else? Yes, I want to watch this one. I'll relink it. It's excellent. It's great that Woody's back at the perfect time. Let's watch this video. Woody, I promise you, you're going to like it. It's excellent. It's great that Woody's back at the perfect time. Let's watch this video. Woody, I promise you, you're going to like it. Okay.

Is there any backstory that we need for this, Kyle? I don't understand what's going on. Again, this is a prospective girlfriend for wings, I guess, whatever you want to call it. Basically, on an overweight dating site this girl uh matched with him i don't know how that works exactly you know but she sent him an email and uh and he reads the email and it is entertaining and you're sure i'll like it all right i plus dating website i honestly thought you were being a dick okay no all right like i don't know why you have a plus size dating website

it's like saying i have no plans to improve like this is where i am like you know well i mean let's imagine i mean if you're 100 150 pounds overweight you're probably not going to fix that in a year yeah right you're probably not going to fix that in two years but you probably want to fuck sometime during that two years that's right so that's fair but if you're probably not going to fix that in two years, but you probably want to fuck sometime during that two years. That's right. That's fair, but if you're in a partnership with someone who also isn't working to fix it, you're probably going to accelerate one another. Or what if you meet that person and then you guys kick ass together? That's possible too.

That's possible. Probably not as likely. Yeah, not likely. Everyone queued up? Yep. Ready, set, play. Music. I'm a big girl. I'm 600 plus trying to lose weight. I'm not huge.

That's the first warning sign. But I do have some pronounced curves. I'm also a very muscular woman. I've only gained weight due to not to being sick for a while so if you're not into curvy strong women you better move on all right the weight's not the issue the weight's not the issue the reason i said that's that's strike one all right i'll tell you in a minute i'm a God-loving cowgirl that is no city princess. Fun-loving and likes a good clean party or club.

I'm allergic to cigarettes. I do not drink whiskey, but then again, I'm crazy and wild enough without it. I like outdoors. I like going out at night, playing in the mud, fishing, camping, Pokemon Go, whitewater rafting, stargazing, nature watching, and many more fun activities. Whitewater rafting? I also like going on dates, but my trusted men is low. Yes, I'm a multiple rape victim. No, I do not whine

or cower in fear about them. Learn from my experience, and I will live to tell my story. I'm a strong, stubborn girl who can't hold her on and don't start fights, but I will finish them. I want casual dates, even if they're not going out somewhere to eat. If you're looking for a love doll and want to get in my pants, keep moving, Buster.

I'm trying to see if there's any decent men really left out here. If we really connect, you might get lucky. But I'm old-fashioned and moral lady. If you want me, you better treat me like a lady and not some beach bimbo. I'm not always serious, but I do keep loosening up. I'm a liberal person. Jokes go right under my head, but I do have a sense of humor towards the right charm.

I'm cute, cuddly, and wild and curvy at the same time. I like anime and I like acting like a kitten. Nico. I'm more animal than I am human. I think what makes me so charming, I live currently as a living maid, so if you want to hang out, you must have a place to hang.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha currently as a live-in maid so if you want to hang out you must have a place to hang so her health like she hints at our health in two separate times so i send her a message i'm like hey i noticed that you have a bachelor's degree what's your bachelor's degree in and also your profile states that you have health problems what kind of health problems are you currently undergoing you know what this girl comes back at me with right you know what this girl comes back at me with she has a rare disease which her neck grows in three different places and if she doesn't go to her chiropractor three times a month to get her neck cracked, she will die. That's Kyle as a girl. I told you you'd like it.

That's great. Does he have a 5.86 KD in his last five TDM games? Did you guys catch that? I didn't catch it. I wasn't paying attention. I was learning about the physics of Fat Girl Mac and how it grows in three different places.

What does that mean? I don't know. Like the vertebrae or growing apart or something? I don't know. Maybe she's got an enormous head. Maybe that's where most of the weight is. Maybe her head is like 200 pounds.

I don't think so she'd know man like a lollipop i like that she said she was 600 pounds but not that heavy or something like it kind of baffled me that's a big yeah i'm a fit 600 that'd be just like if a guy made a profile and he's like i'm four foot ten i i'm not short though it's not about height it has nothing to do with height the fact you're bringing it up my neck doesn't grow in three places that it's supposed to and so i lost like and it's like oh man you think stuff i'll protest too much like it is about the way and when she went through her list of activities it's like how fucking don't insult my intelligence i've never gone whitewater rafting there's no way

in hell that you've gone whitewater rafting unless you were a piece of equipment they kind of pull you out and then hop in i have been whitewater rafting and there's no way in hell you could put a 600 pound anything in that raft it just wouldn't work yeah i'm thinking if it was a chest right like a pirate would have you couldn't bring a 600 pound pirate's chest whitewater rafting with you it's another booty there it's a lot of booty but his kd in the last five games is 5.86 um and his his win loss ratio is over three I always thought if your KD and your win-loss added to over 3, you're doing pretty well. His adds to like 9. Yeah.

He is very good at Call of Duty. That's what he does. And that was a very funny video, Kyle. I liked it. I liked that too. That was fucking excellent. I wish... See...

Have you noticed, Kyle, that everybody's interests on sites like that, everybody repeats the same few things. Yes. Things like whitewater rafting. It's outgoing. Do you know how many habitual whitewater rafters there are in this country who just pop out for a week?

It's so few. What that means is I watched a Discovery Show channel and it looked like it'd be fun someday. Like rock climbing means that I've been to a Dick's Sporting Goods with a little thing in the middle of it that I've done. Camping. I've spent the night in a trailer for a camper. I think that some of these things are especially true when they're girls. I think that guys, of course, play up their outdoorsy side. Girls invent it, I think those things are especially true when they're girls. I think that guys, of course, play up their outdoorsy side.

Girls invent it, I think. It depends on the person. You can tell because there are some girls out there who are very, very out there. They all like the same shit. They all like to go hiking. They're all into photography. It's like they all have the same problem. Kyle, have you considered that they might only have swiped right because they like your dog more than you,

and they want to go on an adventure? They're adventurous. There's so many cliches on there it's like when you find a post when you find a profile that's actually original it's like oh this this person might actually be intelligent that's kind of a turn on if someone's just got kind of a an intelligent original profile in my opinion yeah boogie since you've been losing the weight what kind of pants do you wear would you believe i'm still wearing the exact same pants just they're all drawstring or whatever and i just kind of like i'm like a cartoon character that wear my button downs and just these black fucking drawstring pants that i've been wearing since forever and they're falling off of me and i have to hold them up with my hands right now they look like mc hammer pants because i i'm waiting till i hit 350 to reward myself and

knowing that i'll probably be able to keep those clothes for a lot longer so i don't know it's not you don't have pants money i'm not buying that i do but what's the point in buying like five ten new pairs right now and then Because it's a celebratory shopping trip. That's why I'm waiting for $350. I just got... I don't wear jeans anymore at all, really. I wear pajama jeans. I got a new pair of pajama jeans today.

I don't know if they make pajama jeans in your size yet, but if they do, I highly recommend them because they look... Pajama jeans, huh? Let me show what I got going on here. So they look like jeans, right? What do the butt pockets look like?

Are they obvious? Are they actual pockets? Yeah, they're... Okay. Pockets there. Yeah, pockets here. Right? There's no fly there.

There's no fly. They are pretty convincing. i expected not to believe this at all but i'm kind of buying it wait what does the button area look like the area where a button would usually be like a faux button dead giveaway uh dead giveaway you're right you can't see that part though yeah exactly yeah you keep uh you you know, I'm not buttoning, I'm not tucking my shirt in like some kind of a serial killer, Woody. I, uh. Don't tell them I kill people, you dick.

I'm just telling them that you're into tucking your shirt in. Fuck. Oh. Oh, nevermind. Forget all that. Yeah. So, uh, man, I love the pajama jeans. I really should have like a referral code for when we pitch these products and stuff

because you guys should check these out. It's all I wear now. I got a new pair today. They're like $40 or $50, but here's the beauty, right? I think most of us wear jeans and don't wash them, right? Taylor, how often do you wash your denim jeans? I mean, if I don't spill something on them, they're not, like, stretching out,

like, I can go, like, five days of wearing them, and then I'll wash them. Because, like, after a little while, they start to get, like, stretchy, and they look sloppier, and then you wash them, tighten them back up, and then they're good. I wear them for weeks. I only washed the last pair of pajama jeans twice

and I wore them for months and here's the beauty I don't even take them off just because you're fooling people doesn't mean they're not pajama pants that's gross exactly and that is why somebody smells like cum

who is that I don't even take them off when i go to bed i just i put them on and i put them on in the morning i get i get out of the shower i put on my pajama jeans if i shower that day go about my day do my stuff do my errands run my shopping go on a date maybe go to the movies drive around come back home hop right in the bed don't even take them off they're pajamas it's it's incredible it's i've understood the concept since you're introducing i know i know we're all keeping up just fine so what you're saying is you wear them all the time and they're actually pajamas gotcha yes i look like jean i'm totally caught up, I swear. I swear.

Most of my pants don't fit. Almost all of them fall off unless I wear a belt in quick order, even if they're fresh out of the dryer. But I haven't bought smaller ones because I'm afraid they'll be tight. I can't deal with them. Just try them on. No, I don't.

Go? Leave? Somewhere? No, I don't. Go leave somewhere? You were saying that. No, I don't know. I buy my clothes online mostly. See? And you know what? And she's just saying, well, see, Taylor? It's like, no, it doesn't make me old-fashioned to fucking go to Nordstrom

and make sure that the clothes that I'm wearing fit correctly because then I can try the jeans on and they go, oh, these are actually too long in length. They'll be able to snip it. Do they modify them right at Nordstrom? Oh, yeah. Nordstrom does it for free. I do all my shopping there because I don't like shopping, and they sell everything.

And so you don't even have to go all the way into the mall, which makes me feel like it's a shorter trip. You just walk right into the side outlet, get it all done. I might do that for this summer because the my summer look which is usually like an ill-fitting t-shirt and cargo shorts is not doing it so uh so i need some new clothes you do yourself a disservice with ill-fitting t-shirts like i see people walking around all the time especially over the summer where they have like you know you know praise jesus or like smiley face and it's like an ill-fitting shirt the kind that you would get like for free at a camp first day and it's like even if you're not a fat person

or an overweight person you look fucking horrible the sleeves are enormous and ill-fitting so you look like you borrowed your dad's clothes when you were seven the boxy fit of it gives no definition whatsoever on your body like just spend the extra little bit of money to me is the worst part of my i don't think i've got the biceps they're gonna make any shirt really look good in the sleeves although i'm working on it um but the boxy part is so much worse than it has to be like i dress there's no time where i dress worse than when i'm doing this show like i don't wear like this kind of shit out. This is just a... Why? Why don't you wear something a little... Why don't you show out for the show a touch?

I usually put on a collared shirt if I don't have one on anyway. Yeah, I said when we first started, I was like, oh, Woody's looking nice. Yeah, well, Woody does look nice. And Boogie's got a nice shirt on, too. I feel like Woody gets... I feel like Woody gets lucky after the show often because he's always looking good

right before the show oh I see no it's been almost a day that's where you went that's where you went a few minutes ago okay that's funny no right before the show I was saying I had a sweatshirt on

and it just landed and then I put on a college shirt somebody posted a thing on the reddit today somebody posted a thing on the reddit today had a sweatshirt on it i just landed so and then i put on a college it just landed somebody somebody posted a thing on the reddit today somebody posted a thing on the reddit today and and i don't remember the context but it was a it was a may have been you i couldn't see the face very well because the helmet but they paramotor off right and they just they take off in the sky and somebody and i guess from some angle it looked a little bit like me and someone was like is that kyle and i was like yes it is me i have been training in secret what he's going down at the next race and i think

i convinced a lot of people it was it was a lot of fun i you know i we looked at that thing uh maybe on pkn or i don't remember what it was but we were looking at no no, it was on the subreddit. They were showing some of the trikes, the paramotoring trikes, and they looked like sporty. I don't know. They were like black aluminum carbon fiber. They looked cool. And I hated to admit it, but I was like, that actually looks kind of cool. I could see getting one of those.

I know the trikes are for the old guys or the overweight guys or whatever yeah here's the image right here but injuries sometimes yeah but but that seems like the cool thing to me like like i i get that it's not in the in in the industry or in the sport or whatever but like that one on the left even the one with the two wide wheels that that's not a i don't think it's a trike unless it has a single wheel in the back which doesn't make any sense yeah quad i like that one you know i don't like the yellow or anything the one on the right really looks cool that looks like something james bond might take off in i uh i could black one yeah yeah and i bet it's easier to like learn to do the trike because I don't know. I don't know why I think that.

I guess because there's no running involved, which seems like the worst part of it to me. I don't know which one's easier to learn. I know those two. That's Mike Robinson and Heidi, and they sell Blackhawks. But I feel like all I did is mention Dylane. I did not mean to segue into paramotor talk. I try to avoid it so hard. I swear it occupies all my thoughts, but I don't talk about it.

That's how I feel about hockey. We're like, I'll want to talk about it. I'm like, oh, man, nobody fucking cares. Everybody's going to be like, oh, yeah, really? Well, let's split the difference and do MMA. Ah! Nice. Here, I don't know anything about MMA, but the way uh the way it always goes is oh man so cyborg i

think she might have finally met her match no no she's like a man she looks like a man she has a man face and then what do you be like i don't know i'm just saying and kyle be like no she's on roids right is she on roids what about this uh insert brazilian name here guy he's like really really like gonna be a promising fight in this upcoming one. I don't know. But Conor McGregor, he's not even a fighter anymore. Talk to me two years ago when he was a fighter. Not anymore, though.

He hasn't done anything. Do you remember when Taylor won a rant this good about civilizations? I remember that. The balloons. Where is that phone stuff? Dude, so forgive me. I've got to go on an mma tirade an interesting fight just happened right so you've got stipe miyokic miyokic something close to that and uh he's the heavyweight champion of the world no because of the nature of heavyweight everybody's got bombs

right everybody hits super hard and it becomes hard to defend your title, right? The most anyone's ever defended their title is twice. This is exactly what Taylor just described. You're retelling something you've done ten times. I'm not. Anyway, this fight just happened last week. It, like, couldn't happen on the show. I know, but the whole heavyweights have bombs in their hands.

Okay. fight just happened last week it like couldn't i know but the whole heavyweights have bombs in their hands okay so he's up against this guy in ganu who is the hardest hitting human to have lived thus far and uh bold claim it is a bold claim they measured it they measured it they have this punching measuring device and he's the hardest hitting human to have lived thus far he's gigantic he cuts weight to make heavyweight and uh anyway coming out of this fight either this new guy with all the hype was going to be the next champion or stipe who hadn't really gotten the respect he deserved was going to be the only heavyweight to have ever defended three times and that's what happened and i just feel like... I don't know. It was a big moment in fighting. It was kind of cool

to me. I agree. Did you see Rose's interview on Rogan? Parts of it. I saw her talk about the trash talk in the hallway and the... Did you buy a ticket? There's two pieces of it. Do you remember? Oh, it was really neat.

So this woman, Joanna Jacek, or something very close to that, she was the champion. And she plays head games with other people. She's always, whenever she's just staring, she gets super close. She has all these horrible things to say. And she beats women before she even gets in the ring. Of course, she beats them in the ring. course she beats them in the ring but she does she gets in their head so rose who can be a bit of a head case self-admitted was prepared for it you know during the weigh-in she put her fist right on rose's chin and then

pushed it right not punched her but like pushed her on the chin with her fist, nothing. And then like the day before the fight, she said something like, are you ready? Did you buy your ticket yet? And Rose comes back to the hotel room and she's like, we need a meeting. Apparently that's code in their camp for everyone clear out,

something's gone wrong, right? We need some Rose and Pat Barry fiance talk here. We need to get everyone out and rose is like i just saw joanna in the hallway she asked me if i bought my ticket yet what the fuck does that mean what the hell is going on like i don't get it all the trash talk all the i'm gonna kick your ass i'm here to kill you i'm gonna break your arm like water off a duck's back but she's like did she fuck with my airplane ticket? What did she do? Why do I need to buy a new

ticket? I don't understand at all. And Pat Barry, who's supposed to be her rock, is like, I don't know. Maybe we should check the tickets. It was the most effective of all her trash talking. She just said something weird. Yeah. That's funny. The rematch is going to be good. most effective of all her trash talking. She just said something weird. Yeah, that was great.

That's funny. The rematch is going to be good and I think that Joe was on that card. The New York card, 223. I didn't know he was scheduled. He wrote me today. It's been a while for him, hasn't it? No. He fought Clay Guida about four or five months ago and he had a

rough loss. A very rough loss. Can I read this? I got a text from Joe today. Yes. All right. So if you guys don't know, circling back to paramotors, of course, I broke my leg doing that paragliding thing, right?

And then I made a video where I showed my appreciation for him telling me how to heal as a fighter and someone who lives in fighting. He's an expert in getting injured and coming back. Well, this guy wrote a letter. Hey, Joe, it's Woody, and it's from Matt Woodworth. Thanks for the advice on the broken leg! When you were talking to me, I felt the hair on the back of my neck stand up. But that wasn't the only thing that stood up. Every time I heard you utter a word in your sexy boss accent,

I dribbled a little pre-cum out of my thick, erect cock. When you suggested I get blood spinny shit done to my ankle, I busted a tremendously massive load all over my little fat feet. Much love, Woody, Colin, Jackie, and Hope the Pope. Supposedly from me.

Pretty graphic. Eh, I thought you guys would like it. What the hell yeah that really got my pre-cone dribbling yeah so Joe sent he correctly deduced that it wasn't really me

yeah well that was a conversation killer I thought it'd be funny i didn't know what to say i still don't i'm still thinking about your pre-com well i know you're thinking about boogies you know i mean uh boogie you've uh i know with you like uh like we always talk about the weight loss stuff but i know you've gone through a teeth shit too oh yeah so bad like tooth shit so I went to like months and months

ago I went to the dentist as you do like every six months and they were like yeah we got to get you right back in here because you're really grinding your teeth severely and I was like alright yeah I'll see you in a bit and then i kept pushing off my appointment because i didn't want to go back and i went back this time for my next six

month checkup and like the the dentist pulled me into like a consult room you know where they like talk about treatments and shit and he was like uh so your actual teeth like your oral health is good like you're clearly i i don't floss but but I didn't fool him with that either. He's like, you know, you clearly brush your teeth, take care of it, aren't eating like a ton of sugar or anything. They look good, no cavities. But your teeth are ground down very badly. So a rule of thumb we have in dentistry is you can expect about a millimeter

of grinding down on your teeth uh every 50 years or so 50 i was like okay every 50 5-0 and he was like now some of your teeth you've ground down so much that they're 2.5 millimeters ground down which would be like if you were 125 and i was like oh no i'm not i'm like 100 years younger than that please tell me you said that out loud no I was like I was I was dreading looking at the pamphlet he's about to present to me and like then he gave me like the not the scare tactics it's a real thing like uh and if you don't know like my I grind my teeth terribly because my bite sucks and uh apparently when you're awake like you can't do a ton a ton of damage to your teeth because like your brain will tell you like stop it stop grinding stop grinding until you're like

before you can do any damage but when you're asleep that part of your brain turns off and so you can like grind your teeth like five times harder in your sleep and not even know and i've been grinding my teeth my entire life badly because my jaw like doesn't line up right i guess and uh he said i have the strongest masseter muscles he's ever seen on a person he's been a dentist for like 40 years which is the uh the jaw thing so put me up against bite strength yes i can take anyone in your crocodile pit bull and no it is my my jaw doesn't click he asked me about that and it doesn't and so that was like one of the warning signs that i didn't have but he's like oh you have trouble falling asleep you have trouble like uh do you ever get a headache and i'm like yeah sometimes

like he's like yeah well it's because you're grinding your teeth hard enough that they're like 125 years old like my molars like are almost flat like it's just worn down and so i was like all right well what do we do about this and he's like well and i could tell it was serious because he didn't even like go into a sales pitch he was like also there's like 1500 nerves in each of your teeth and you're very fortunate that they don't hurt yet because you've ground down a lot of them almost to the the quick of sorts like so you're going to start getting some severe pain my my canines i have no points on my canines it's so bad that like You know if you took the corner of a piece of paper And you took a hole punch and put it halfway Up on that corner and clipped it

That would be a little like semi-moon Where it would be like two little sharp points Instead of one with a hollowed out point That's what my canines are like What the fuck is wrong with you? You're borderline You're gonna be Jeremy You know that right?

Oh at some point I would if I didn't get this taken care of. Alright, so your teeth are fucked. What's the plan? So my teeth, I grind them so bad, he was like, alright, so we're going to get you in to like, have you guys ever had a chipped tooth fixed? Where they put that composite or whatever,

like fake tooth, and they like reform it into whatever shape it's supposed to be? I had that a year and a half ago. going yeah so he's going through my whole mouth and or i guess like my front teeth the front teeth are the ones that like are helping the bite lock in place and whatnot and so he's going through my whole fucking mouth doing all of that and then after that for a few months i'm gonna like wait play it by ear, make sure that none of them shatter or anything and that it's comfortable and everything. And then I'm getting veneers on the front six of my teeth because the dudes – not the dude. It wasn't the dude who told me this.

It was a dentist. Because then the dentist told me that the veneers would actually keep my bite kind of in place, so I wouldn't be able to grind as bad. I was like, okay, yeah, I'm all on board for this. I don't want to be one of those no-teeth people, because I would never let that happen. Hey, we no-teeth people aren't that bad.

We're a crowd, folk. I can tell. Stop making fun of us. I'm not making fun of my so uh i'm gonna get all that done and it's gonna be like at least like twelve thousand dollars yeah i was about to say i was like are you about to drop 10 grand on teeth do you have dental insurance yeah i do you'll find it almost worthless because dental insurance is shit it is going to be worthless uh but because of course they don't cover veneers so i'm literally going because like most people when they get veneers it's for like cosmetic shit to like make their teeth look better but i'm going to like an

actual oral surgeon to like get a doctor note like a second where he can be like uh because my dentist even said too he's like these veneers they would be cosmetic. They would be to keep you from having bad headaches when you wake up and to protect your teeth so you're not grinding them to shit. And I was like, okay, well, if I go talk to someone, get a second doctor to confirm that to my insurance company, do you think they might pay for some of it? And he's like, oh, definitely.

I would say go for that because we're not doing this to make your teeth look better. We're doing it so that you have teeth that aren't ground into a fine powder by the time that you're 50. Oh, as a side effect, you'll do even fucking better on Tinder? Even better. My teeth, I take good care of them.

Just sucks. Oh, Kyle. Like, I even had braces, and that didn't fix my jaw. That didn't fix my teeth. You know what you need, right? You need a retainer. I was surprised they make a night guard, right? Isn't that what people wear

an appliance at night? He didn't suggest that. Yeah. That's what I needed. I had a retainer when I was I guess like 16 when I got my braces off and I'd wear it at night and every night I would or every morning I'd wake up and it would be hidden in my comforter somewhere because I would spit it out

and so like the one that I'm getting now is like super heavy duty like you form exactly form fitted to your teeth with like a bite thing in there to keep me from doing it and I will wear that thing every single night the rest of my life if I have to pay fucking fifteen thousand dollars to fix my teeth right now which I'm not enthused about so oh did you mention that it slipped by me you did you say you were gonna get a what do you what do they call it an appliance uh that after this surgery thing or after they fix my teeth oh not really surgery because they're just adding shit to it but like my teeth are too far gone to like depend on uh um appliance or whatever anymore like they're not trying to just stop it from advancing there

it's time to repair yeah it's definitely time to repair because like my teeth line up like you guys probably have some overlap on your teeth where like they come down in front of your other teeth mine come down exactly right on top of each other and like i didn't i just am so used to my shitty lined up teeth in my in my head that like a cartoon like a very painful cartoon so like i always thought like like i ever since you mentioned it yesterday like i'm paying attention now like just even sitting around when i'm not talking my like your brain wants to tell your jaw and your teeth to set and like where they're supposed to be and mine doesn't set and so all the time like my jaw is like trying to find where it's supposed to be and i guess i'm just so used to it that like i don't notice like my teeth

hitting each other all the time and so yeah well this isn't a funny story but have you ever had that repair stuff before like a chip tooth oh you have my right front tooth in hockey and uh they put that some shit on there and but it was only for this front tooth and so it broke off like actually i think it was it broke off during hockey again like a month it's really fragile compared to teeth yeah definitely and so that's what i'm worried about most is that I'm going to spend the five grand or whatever it is to get that shit or four grand or whatever

to get all that stuff put on and then a week later I'm going to be like oh shit, I accidentally broke three of them so I guess this veneer thing is out of the question. I can save you quite a bit of money. Do you do it cheap? A little spackle,

a little drywall? I restored an entire... I did a whole paint job and body work one time. $1,400. That was a Mustang. I can get a little fiberglass, a little bondo. I've got all kinds of sandpaper.

All the grits. I've got all kinds of sandpaper all the grits i've got pneumatic tools right i'm i'm very handy with a hammer i can i can knock any dents out that you might have to say we could just knock them all out and get you dentures just you know fuck it oh yeah good idea no honestly no all jokes aside i really do think that's what i'm having to do like i looked at like the dental implants and I really want to do dental implants. Yeah. But they're like two or three grand a tooth. Yeah.

I got good money, but I ain't got that kind of one. I got half of it. Dude, Mexico. Mexico, man. Or honestly, Mexico's silly. Costa Rica, somewhere like that. Mexico, they'll kidnap you and take your YouTube money. Costa Rica, you'll get some prostitutes.

Dominican Republic, you'll get some nice prostitutes. I don't want prostitutes working on my teeth, though, is the thing. What are you saying over there? I'm not following the conversation. Am I going to get a prostitute on my dick while they're doing the teeth work? Because I would be into that. It's a package deal, okay? Just let them know. I need 32 teeth and two whores six thousand dollars climax is a natural painkiller just saying

i mean but so i'm i'm looking at finally getting my teeth done because one of the biggest issues i was having i would go in and they'd be like we can't put you under and then um i'm like why because you're too big if you fell out of the chair we'd be in a lot of trouble okay i get that shit so they can strap you to the chair then they would like they would do like um they would uh check my blood pressure the last couple times i went in there like your blood pressure is just way too high you can't be here i'm like yeah well i have an anxiety disorder how am i going to deal with this so finally i found a doctor who's like here's a bottle of xanax for when you need to go to the dentist because you need to go to the dentist right the fuck now before one of these

infections fucking kill you yeah yeah so i uh hopefully next week i mean you know what it's like with the youtuber you don't want to not be able to talk for a couple weeks you know or talk for a week but maybe just on a friday i'll just let them rip a few out and then at some point it's going to be years of work and it's going to be hundreds it's going to kill it if you're missing teeth that'd be fantastic i'm hoping that i'm i'm hoping i'll be funny when they uh i'm hoping i'll at least be funny when they um uh gas me or whatever that way i can just like get at least one youtube video out of it or whatever so speaking of uh people who need dental work this man bit a smartphone battery as a test and it exploded in his mouth ah test complete failed or what was he trying to do

well i i don't know what he's trying to do, but as you probably know, you know, if you... Oh, just as I suspect, a lot of power in this battery. Enough to blow your teeth out. Yeah, you can see it. It's the guy in the black with the hat,

and he bites it, and it blows up. Yeah. And it shoots this poor woman in the white, it seems. Well, she was dumb enough to be hanging out next to someone who's biting batteries. Biting a battery. Yeah, the way those things work is, you know, when you hit them with a hammer, when you squeeze them too hard, or when you bite them like a maniac,

is, you know, you're connecting the cells inside those lithium batteries. And I've seen, there's a video on YouTube, if you search hitting cell phone battery with hammer, you'll see what happens when you do it. They go off. It's really cool. Those things are dangerous. I'm trying to think what it,

oh, Woody and I were talking about electric paramotors, not to go too far back into paramotors. It's not me. I know, it's me, right? I'm doing the paramotors, not to go too far back into paramotors. It's not me. I know, it's me, right? I'm doing the paramotor talk, but we were talking about how the, I was like, I would not want an electric paramotor because I would imagine you've got a big battery pack

on your back, and this could potentially happen on your back midair. I've got an idea for that. Take the battery pack, encase it in like a metal case, like an ammo case, and now you have a bomb hmm do you yeah i mean you previously had something that expand all you need to do is put it in a casing that doesn't want to expand and it's like a grenade

right so i don't think it's making uh enough pressure quickly enough i don't think it's making enough pressure quickly enough. I don't think it's conflagrating at a high enough speed. It just seems to smolder, right? And fizzle. I don't know. Is it that much different than gunpowder? Which just kind of...

I mean, you've lit gunpowder on like a table. Yeah, but... Like you empty a bullet and you put it on a table or a shotgun shell. It catches on fire, but it's not that amazing or anything. Yeah, but it's about the pressure. Just like, you know, with a fuel injection engine, if you've ever lit gasoline, it just kind of... But when you vaporize and inject it into a pressurized cylinder,

it explodes. It's about the pressure. That's why we're putting the batteries in a metal case. I don't think it'd work well hmm woody's lab oh i i i miss woody's lab you've got i i i don't know why you don't get back into that you've got all the uh i made so much progress on it yeah there was there was the time you talked about doing it. There was when you're like, October, it's coming. You didn't say one year.

Ten months away. Oh, that old joke. She's three years running. We're nine months away from Woody's Lab 2018. Or 21 months away Who knows Or 33 months away

Could be 45 I'm not 10 I played coy Coming as soon as the XFL That's coming back did you hear that Yeah I'm excited Vince McMahon is doing it I've never watched professional wrestling in my entire life but i have watched clips of vince mcmahon doing his shtick during professional wrestling

on youtube and that that is a showman he is seems like a hilarious hilarious dude so yeah he'll do well he'll do very well hopefully i i'm up for it i hope it's more violent than uh than the nfl the nfl seems that is the problem with nfl not enough they got this pink ribbons out there on the players they're all worried about head injuries if i'm if i'm vince mcmahon i put some rhino horns on those helmets i i i up the violence right or maybe take a step back remember those old meathead leather helmets they used to wear back when men were men? Oh, yeah. That's exactly.

What you need to do is put them in. I'm looking up a picture right now of it for you. One of these. This is actually George Clooney from that movie Leatherheads. Yeah, I figured it was. Yeah. Yeah. Like you put them in one of those.

Think of how devastating and how many CTE problems they're going to have if they're wearing that upturned Halloween candy basket on their head. Such a jackass. That's George Clooney? I'll give it a go. I hardly recognize him.

I'll try the X xfl i don't remember i didn't watch it when it was around but i remember it i remember that guy that's kind of featured here on the article uh that he hate me guy yeah yeah they made him put his real name on his jersey whenever i think he went to the nfl so it was that was that was a shame i was like pretty excited about the XFL because I thought it was going to be professional wrestling style. I don't know. Just super over the top and funny and cool.

It just wasn't good. Hopefully the showmanship will be a lot better the second time through. Yeah. I hope that he tries to be everything that the NFL is not. What are the holes? The holes. I hope that he tries to be everything that the NFL is not. I hope, like, you know, in the NFL, the NFL,

the holes, H-O-L-E-S. Like, I don't know where the NFL is going so wrong. Do you stop them from kneeling? Is that a reason to not like the whole NFL? Every player is waving a flag when, as the game starts.

They're all, they all come running out, each holding a larger flag. They're all second tier happy to have jobs anyway. They're not going to kneel. They're going to do what they're goddamn told. Yeah. Yeah, they're like, I'm not risking this job.

I make 80 grand a year. Yeah, right? Right? If it's not this, it's back to McDonald's. All those shit. Wouldn't it be nice to make 80 grand a year playing a game that you love? Dude. Of course it would. We would have winter training camp for swimming. wouldn't it be nice to make 80 grand a year playing a game that you love dude i i i we would

have um like winter training camp for swimming i made zero for that but i was treated like an athlete like the primary reason someone was interested in me was swimming and it was the closest i'll ever be to a pro athlete even though i didn't make any money if there was a hockey team out there right now that offered you $80,000 a year, it'd sign the fuck up, right? Oh, yeah. I mean, as long as they're not like, all right, tonight you're going up against the fucking,

you know, Pittsburgh Penguins. They're like, oh, I'm going to get my shit kicked in. No bullshit. You do it. You play against the Penguins. No, I would try my best. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Against any NHL player,

even if I'm stronger physically, which I'm not, because their legs are insanely powerful. That would be no fun. Actually, it would be fun, but probably for the first 15 minutes. I shot on an NHL goalie before.

Who was it? Irby from the Hurricanes. And he blocked all my shots seemingly without moving. That was the thing. At least in the beer league, they would have to do a split or some glove save or something. Everything I shot on Irby, he acted like he was already there. It was just, like, a tiny little thing. He really seemed like a dick about it.

Yeah. Well, it's because, like, lower-level goalies, like, they wait until the puck's off your stick to start tracking it for the most part. Like, they're just, like reaction saving like a guy who's in the nhl has played so much he could tell from the angle of your stick where your feet were he's like oh he's gonna try and go high blocker i'll just kind of shift over oh and it stopped it oh he's gonna try and do that like and of course your hands aren't fast enough to be like i told this story silly but really it was like a magic show the fact that he could block every shot, it seemed to take no effort. Nothing caught him by surprise and everything.

And if I tried to like, you know, get clever up front, which goalies hate, and I hate that goalies hate that because that's what I want to practice. But he even broke that up, you know, with no effort. There was nothing worse in hockey practice than you're doing some kind of drill where you're getting a shot on you every, you know, six seconds or whatever. And some douche bag has to like come in on a deke and then just like try and

hold you there. And then like you poke check and then stop paying attention and go to the next guy and he'll like score. And like, and it's like, you, you didn't score on me. There's another guy coming with another puck

and now it's my job to stop him. You failed. You know what would happen if you try this little dipsy-do in a real game? You're going to get a concussion. I hope you do. You're right, especially because you said you did a poke check, right? If you get a stick on the puck, then that play is broken up. In real game, your defenseman would be there to clean me up

and I wouldn't get just limitless opportunities to keep playing against you but uh but like in warm-ups and stuff because if you play in beer league there aren't any practices or anything like when you warm up i would like an opportunity to skate in on the goalie you know but instead you're supposed to just go on the blue line and practice your slap shots and i get that that's what goalies want but as a player it's's like, well, shit. I guess the two breakaways I get this game will be that, you know, I practice this as much as ten times a year. I'm getting better so fast.

See, like, it's – they don't have to be slap shots from the blue line because you don't really need practice on those anyway. But, like, shots from, like, the hash marks, really need practice on those anyway. But like shots from like the hash marks like right in front of the net. That's where you need shots from. Or the top of the circle. Like places where you're realistically a slot. Like shoot from the slot so that you know you're going to get

a real shot from there during the game. But then when you have people in the warm... Because there were times I'd be playing on my actually competitive teams and we'd finish a warm up before a game and I'd be like, wow. I do not feel warm at all. I feel aggravated that my shitty teammates had to turn this into a deke competition right before a game.

It's like I don't feel very prepared at all. But regardless, I can see Boogie's eyes turning listlessly away. Boogie's on Tinder right now. Yeah, straight up, man. Are you on Tinder yet or not yet uh you know yeah i hopped on there and um a few other like dating websites or whatever messed around a little bit i found that it was going to be a lot easier to date this time around than it used to be um because i got a few nibbles from girls that recognize me from youtube um which then that worries me a little bit because you know like you know they know i do well there

right so that's kind of scary yeah um but then like a few girls had no clue i was who were just interested in like the face shots but then you know you like talk to them for a while you send them a body shot and then like they start to ghost you a little bit right because they're not they don't realize how big i am i guess because of the beard and stuff so that can be a little weird um but i've just been chatting you know and just like getting to know some people and i don't know like coffee stuff like that nothing crazy yet you know that's good i mean uh i don't know i think it's gonna be way way easier this time around you know um some of the girls i met have just been fantastic and just straight up gorgeous too it's just been it's weird it's weird i don't know i was thinking about taylor's

advice for like doing well on tinder and it basically paraphrases to exercise and get hot and it's like right yeah well that i mean honestly is that any easier is there like is there a direction to comb your hair that they prefer like like tinder was the the worst one out of all the ones i hopped on um because like it's just a meat market right and and so like the only the only three swipe rights i got uh from tinder one was just a girl i would never be interested in she's like 42 or something and like disabled and as big as me and i'm like i don't know that's gonna work so she's your age and she's your size yeah and she goes like on tinder and i'm like weird that's definitely not gonna happen you know what was her disability

wheelchair i didn't say that just i didn't like it just like i don't know it just said disabled that's all it said on her profile her profile was just summarized with the word disabled and i'm like okay well that's all i need to know then i guess that you're a hater look at this guy i know no i'm not saying i'm not no i'm saying i would like to have had more information and never go to disabled because of my back pain disabled because of you know i gave birth to an alien and it ripped my vagina off or whatever i don't know i'm gonna post this one right on our choosing beggars, right? Then another girl messaged me. She's like 30-something, and she's like, oh, you seem really nice.

I'm like, thanks. She's like, I kind of recognize you. I'm like, oh, that's okay. She's like, so look, I would love to meet up and hang out with you a little bit, but I'd have an ulterior motive. I'm like, uh-oh, they they're gonna ask for money or something right he's like a prostitute and i'm like yeah i'm i'm i'm down to listening to anything but i make no guarantees and she's like you know after we met do you think you could meet my son because he's a big fan of yours i knew that was it i knew it and i'm like i was waiting for her to ask for a shout out. Right. Well, I'm expecting that to come any day.

Right. And I'm like, you know what? Shit. I don't know. She's not that cute. So I just made, she's like, we'll make a video for my son. I'm like, okay, I'll do that. So I'm going to get a video for his son.

Oh, well, that's kind of nice. And I don't know. I mean, I like anything to give back to people. Right. But, and then another girl i met um i was like really into she's like from the university of arkansas she's like 20 uh this i mean i've seen through tinder or whatever and uh then we talked for a while and she's like she's like what are you looking for exactly i'm like i don't know man i just got out of the divorce you know i'm still

in the healing phase i don't know what i'm looking for i'm just like practicing and talking to people and maybe if there's a connection there we'll do stuff but otherwise i'm just like talking and she's like well i'm kind of looking for a benefactor i'm like and block right what what is a benefactor i don't know right and like there's there's other there's like plenty of stuff out there like that too if you're looking for a sugar daddy that's there's websites dedicated to that yeah there are and i you know i mean hell i wouldn't mind you know if a girl's beautiful enough you've got to be like a 10 right you got to be a 10 but if you're 10 i'll i'll buy you dinner just to be around you right i'm not flying you to europe or anything like that but if you're like a 10 and i'll take you out to fucking the nicest place in northwest arkansas and just have some fun there There's nothing wrong with that. Buy you dinner just to look at you for a while. That's

okay. You know, but I don't know. It's weird. I sit here and try and like, I'm already shipping buggy with these women. I'm like, which one? All right. So we've got three ladies on the table. Which one is the best? I think my favorite is mom so far. And Taylor, that computer programmer you never went out with i'm still a little heartbroken i haven't completely gotten over her taylor has fucked we never even met but she's the one i want to open my what i want my life what i want is like a super tiny super petite super skinny like fucking pretty girl right like give me like one of those like five footers like a buck ten or whatever and uh you know she's like nice hair or something

like that this japanese girl again i want her to be like super open-minded so like if she works in the industry or whatever she's like if she's like if i meet another girl and i'm like hey can i hook up with this girl she'd probably be okay that's fine so i can experiment and like someone wants to keep it fun and easy and open. And that would be the dream girl. And if I find that girl, I'm just going to fucking stay with her forever. I won't marry her.

I won't move in with her. I want to find a very hot girl who wants to fuck all the time and do what I want, but doesn't really want much in return. And is just going to be cool with that. And it's like yeah yeah buddy till you left this is what we all want she lets him fuck other women too right oh yeah no dude listen no but listen seriously i had this friend and she could fly

i had this friend pull me aside i had this friend pull me aside the other day and he's just like and you know i'm i'm big i'm a begging chooser right but i'm saying this is my dream situation it's my dream situation is what i'm saying okay but like my friend pulled me aside and he's like so you're dating again and stuff i'm like probably you know not like really but kind of right and um you know he's certainly not gonna go public about it if i do so it's not it's none of your fucking business or whatever uh but he's like so uh you know you need to be careful because you know some of these girls that you you you've talked to on tinder some of them are just gonna want your money especially like the pretty ones and stuff i'm like what are

you trying to say he's like these pretty girls they're out of your league boogie and i'm like number one fuck you right like fuck you right like no girls out of my league i there's no reason i couldn't end up with a model i'm a nice guy i do well for myself you, fuck you, right? Like, no girl's out of my league. There's no reason I couldn't end up with a model. I'm a nice guy. I do well for myself. You know, fuck you. It wouldn't be the first time I had sex with a girl way out of my league if I nailed some girls way out of my league. Fuck you, right?

Secondly, what if I find an ugly girl, right? What if I find, like, some woman twice as big as I ever was? Not saying that necessarily makes you ugly, ladies and gentlemen, but if you, you you know and and who is like a burned victim not necessarily saying you can't still be beautiful but she's also that and she also is just like angry all the time and loves to complain about shit and will scream at me every day do you think that girl also won't care about money because guess what money is a human thing right all All women love money. All men, all people, money is a thing. I have a little bit. I'm not a millionaire, but I do well for myself.

I have half as much as I did four months ago, but I'm doing all right. Did you used to be a millionaire? I'm no longer a millionaire. Close, right? But I couldn't even understand the point he was making. Are you trying to tell me that women like money? Are you telling me that I should try to find the one woman in the world

that doesn't give a shit about money? Well, where the fuck is she, right? She's living in a hat in Uganda just thinking about clean water and food. Right, but part of the... In a hat? Part of the... Either that or, like, what, am I supposed to date one of the three female Walmart execs up in Bentonville who have way more money than me?

Is that what I'm supposed to do? Like, I don't understand. I'm like, dude, yes, obviously. But here's what I told him. And, like, this is kind of shitty. And this is kind of, like, passive-aggressive or whatever. I don't really care. I'm like, dude, what is the worst-case scenario?

That I marry her and she takes half? Guess what? I'm never getting married again. So that's not going to happen. Bam! Right? You know, like... I thought you were going with that. I thought you were going to be like, guess what? I'm used getting married again, so that's not going to happen. Bam! Right? I thought you were going to be like, guess what?

I'm used to that. Right, right, right. You know, I just realized Woody is now a disciple of the Church of Kyle. He's gone completely anti-marriage, right? What do you mean? I've done what? Boogie is a disciple. I'm sorry, did I say Woody?

You said Woody. I'm like, wait, what? No, we have to wait for that tragic accident for you. I am not anti-marriage. Let me say that very clearly. If you want to get married, if someone out there is listening, if somebody out there is listening, you want to get married, you should get married. It was a fun experiment.

We took a big gamble at something very awesome, and we weren't able to make it work and that's fine. And that doesn't mean that you won't be able to make it work. It doesn't mean that you won't be a happily married man. Who's doing everything you want to do with all the kids you want in the world. Like try it. You should do it.

Go nuts. I'm saying for me, I'm done. I took my chance at it. I fucked it up bad. We fucked it up bad. I'm done. That's what i'm saying you just cut ties and watch them walk away with half a million dollars right you know well i mean in all three to be okay because again people are gonna get like the wrong idea and i i don't i don't feel

the need to defend my wife but i do feel the need to tell the truth. She was very generous in the end, you know, and like, you know, she's got the rest of her life to worry about and she did help earn all that money. So she was very actively participate, stuff like that. So when, when, when I asked her what she wanted, um, and she said, I, I, whatever's fair. And I'm like, is this fair to you? And she's like, yes, that's fair. And then we went to the lawyer and the lawyer's like, remember, this is a 50-50 state. And so you're expected to split it down the middle. And I'm like, all right, then that's what we'll do. And so we did what we were supposed to do and we just got it done and everybody was happy and she gets to be happy and I'm happy. And she could sue for alimony. There's no alimony.

She could do whatever. She could do all kinds of terrible things. You paid it up front, right? You just sort of – is that what the deal is? She got a lump sum? She took a lump sum of the liquid funds is what she took. You said there's no alimony. In North Carolina, I had two coworkers who got divorced, and they kind of had a choice.

They could have either lump summed it or paid in alimony. She had the choice of both if she wanted it. She could take the lump-sum half and then also alimony until I'm dead or until she remarries. And she had that choice, and she didn't even pursue it. Alimony until you're dead. Yeah, until she remarries. That's pretty much the Arkansas way, it looks like. Oh, because I'm only going by the one friend who chose alimony.

Right. And his was six years. And the way that he explained it, coming from his attorneys, is he was like, yeah, she had a professional job early in the marriage. We had kids. She stopped working for a long time. Six years is long enough to get back on your feet. And I thought about it, and it was like, yeah, that's true. More than enough time. Yeah. Yeah. You know, like, you know,

and let me praise my ex for here for a minute. Not only was she super fair to me in the run long run, she was back to work the day she could get a work. She hit the ground running. She was excited to go back to work. She's a very independent woman. She didn't want to live off of me. She didn't, I don't, I think she even felt comfortable taking anything, honestly. And at the end of the day,

you know, I mean, I have no reason to defend that woman, but she was absurdly fair in the grand scheme of things. And I hate when people imply otherwise, you know? Well, that's good.

Yeah. It was an amicable breakup. I'm the worst guy in the world to say what I'm about to say, but you should not let the internet's opinion get between your ears. I do it, but it's so obvious that it's... It's so hard not to, right? Oh, yeah. I get it. It's so hard not to.

I'm a little better recently. I'm not sure if they're being nicer to me or if I just understand for the memes, but I can see that their thoughts have entered your thoughts, and the things that you've thought about so far, like the cock and the black and the whatever, blacked, I mean to say, those are just people being goofy. No, those are definitely those people. But I have some real dedicated motherfuckers who are like just like super. They wake up in the morning and they're like, I wonder if today is the day that i can get this fat fuck to kill himself and then they'll post

stuff like that on reddit they'll be like well i think we're one step closer to getting them to kill himself uh it's been a hard day's work i'll see you in the morning and i'm like what do they do what do they do for a living like i don't know you know but they're like they're straight up dedicated as dedicated as as as my new you know i hired a pa right and he's working eight hours a day for me right now and like they're as dedicated as that guy they wake up in the morning they're like oh let's see if they can find something to fuck with him on twitter let's see what he's fucked up on youtube let's see let's post something on the subreddit let's see if we can get in the nibble let's see if we can torture him in a way that will make him blow his fucking

brains up because that's our end goal every day they they put an eight-hour shift into it. I swear to God they do. And it's just like insane that that is like, why not just do your own shit? Anybody who can spend that much time doing that kind of shit, you don't need to be concerned. If anybody has like four hours a day to troll the same fucker on the internet, like good Lord, at least diversify a bit right spread it out it it is funny they do have they do seem to have like four or five guys they target they like they have like their little subgroup or whatever and where do they post this stuff on your personal reddit oh yeah like my personal reddit or there's like a few subreddits so they like uh set around it and just do it and stuff and are you a mod on your reddit yeah i'm the only mod on my

reddit since my mod quit because it got too bad he's like i don't even want to do this anymore woody craft that happened and so they're like i have to quit they're targeting my parents no right now my my mod here's go do whatever it is you want to do but like uh my subreddit has been completely unmanaged for like six months now and i like don't care because just post whatever you want to post that's fine uh you know circle jerk however you want to circle jerk there's an auto moderator there so if somebody flags it it's going to get removed you know to the right number of people flag it or whatever but otherwise you can pretty much post whatever hate-filled shit you want i don't care probably better that way doesn't doesn't really you know

two years ago we used to moderate the PKA subreddit. Yeah. And it really just drives the end effect every time. Exactly, right. My post is gone, et cetera. Now, let them say what they want to say and let it roll off your back. Yeah, right. And I think the biggest thing is, you know, they're like, oh, Boogie's a piece of shit.

Okay, that's fine. Boogie's a fat piece of shit, ugly fat. Okay, yeah, that's cool. Oh oh, Boogie's a piece of shit. Okay, that's fine. Boogie's a fat piece of shit, ugly fat. Okay, yeah, that's cool. Oh, kill yourself, you fat piece of shit. Okay, that's fine. Your wife is a cheating whore. You know, I used to love that woman, so fuck off, right? Like, that bothers me, right?

Like, that's what bothers me is that, like, the things, the messages they're spreading could impact the rest of her life. they're spreading could impact the rest of her life. And it's bad enough that she's got to live the rest of her life as a divorced woman who had to deal with my shit, right? Like I've done enough damage to that woman. This business did enough damage to this woman. She hated it. She hated every second of the drama and the never knowing where the paychecks are coming from and never knowing whether or not, you know, the channel was going to die tomorrow, whether or not I was going to get community struck or fucking, you know, yellow icon or God knows what. It was so hard on her. And don't let that follow her for the rest of her life.

Or are you that guy who fucked around on that YouTuber? Are you the guy who fucked that black guy or whatever? No, that sucks, man. I don't want that for her. I don't want that for anybody, but I want that for her. I, you know, I don't love her the way I used to love her now. You know, I don't even know if I love her at all anymore. We're friends, and I feel very friendly towards her.

But, you know, again, I wouldn't want that for a friend. I wouldn't want that for an enemy, you know? Yeah, the best way, though, is to just ignore it. Like, don't even address it. Like, it's been on the internet. Don't feed the trolls since the beginning because it keeps it going. So when you say, like, man, I just hate when they say she's a cheating bitch, like, you know what to expect.

Right, but what I'm saying is, here's what I'm saying, though, here, is, like, your core audience, like, one of those motherfuckers are going to sit here and listen to this. Like, if they're that bored, let them have their little victory. I give one of them like, if you're listening right now and you're one of those people that like serial harass me and my ex-wife or whatever, and you set through all of this to get to this,

then you deserve it. Okay. You have your little moment, you know, I see. We timestamp these. So this will be under right weakness

but this is for like this is for your audience who are like well didn't you get cucked no didn't she take all this money no didn't she sue him for no none of that's true that's all i'm saying you know for for the fans and pk fans who care it's for the memes man when man. When they're talking about your wife, they're not actually thinking that any of these things are remotely true. It's just a thing that people are saying on repeat because it's funny. Right, but that's what you think. But then, you know, 4chan creates a meme that says you can microwave your fucking iPhone and then a half dozen people do it, right? And then a half dozen people do it, right? And so when that happens, when they say Boogie's wife cucked him,

then there's a bunch of fans who see that in the comment section and don't know any better. There's people who don't know who I am who might have learned who I was at one point, but their misconception is, oh, isn't that guy who beat his wife? Isn't he the guy who whatever they've heard two or three times removed? That's what drives me crazy. It's not the people perpetuating the memes. I know they're just trolls with nothing to do, and that's fine. They're bored, or maybe they're doing it for fun. That's what drives me crazy. It's not the people perpetuating the memes. I know they're just trolls with nothing to do, and that's fine. They're bored, or maybe they're doing it for fun. That's fine.

But it's the people who see it secondhand, then thirdhand, then fourthhand, and know the context. That's what drives me crazy. I used to be in that same state of mind. I so recognize everything you're saying, and I understand the hurt. But I don't give a shit. Again, it really had not bothered me for years until it started involving another person. And now that it involves another person, it bothers me again. You know what I'm saying?

Does that make sense? Whatever you want to say about me, that's fine. Whatever. I mean, if you legitimately are sitting there listening to this with lube in one hand and your cock in the other, you're like, oh, I can't wait till this fat fuck dies. I hope he dies today. That's cool. Busted.

If you genuinely feel that way, that's cool. I don't give a shit about how you feel about me. Another thing that I'm hearing from you that I relate to is the thick skin isn't always a positive. It comes and goes is what I'm saying, you know, and I'm hearing you say like, yeah, you know, I've been in this game a long time, right? You were in 4chan five years ago, 10 years ago, you know, the, you know, the game, but you know, the thick skin, it, it, sometimes it gets thin. Yeah, exactly. And, and it's of course, you know, and they know that, and they know when I'm going

through a divorce, now's the time, right his skin's probably this might be when we can finally kill that fat fucker right like maybe this maybe he's already on the verge of suicide maybe i can get suicidal thoughts oh yeah every day since i was like 12 but like nothing nothing special about the nothing special about the divorce, right? I was like, all right, well, you know, you're probably right. This probably does need to end, and I'm pretty much okay with it. Plus, I'm excited to see what life has to offer me after it's over, so let's go see what that's like.

And then there are periods of time, I think, where I was worried about losing everything. I was worried that, like, the PR would go super bad, and I was worried that, like, I go super bad. And I was worried that like, um, I was going to use, lose my YouTube career over it. I wouldn't be strong enough to work. I wouldn't be strong enough to like do the things I needed to do. And like during that, when that fear was at the worst, I was like, man, I might be better off dead. I really should think about that. This might be a fight too hard to fight. I don't know. And those times I was serious.

Um, but otherwise, no, not really. I've never really been serious. I don't know. And those times I was serious. But otherwise, no, not really. I've never really been serious, I think, about it. It's just like a joke to me. I like suicidal memes, like bleach memes and Tide Pod memes. And like, you know, I don't know. It's just a way to cope for me. I don't know. At 15, I tried to kill myself.

At 34, I bought the means to kill myself and had it but never acted on it um and yeah nothing this time this time i'm just like whatever yeah you said at 15 i was like, I'm a late bloomer. Yeah, I don't know. Life is too exciting, and death is inevitable, right? So since I know I'm going to die anyway, who cares a shit, right? Let's just wait. If I want to die, I'll just wait.

It's guaranteed, so I'll just wait. Yeah. For everybody, I guess. Dark! Yeah, we got a lot of cool stuff coming. Kyle, is this a good segue into an ad? Yeah! Is it time, Chiz? I think this is a good time, Chiz.

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today oh i i'm convinced i gotta tell you they they do make some pretty cool watches i've always been a guy who said it's 2018 why do i need a watch um and it's a fashion statement and if you're going to get a watch you want a fashionable watch and they do have some pretty cool stuff like i've never bought any of the watches because my wrists are so big i don't really buy any watches right now but um i you know like that's the thing you know girls wear watches still occasionally they love them um they're bracelets as well too but then you know i i think it's cool it's a fashion piece right like i still could i still buy different pairs of glasses it's fashion piece so why not i like when i get a cool fashion what kind of watch you're wearing you can subtly look at your wrist but you can't subtly pull your phone out of your pocket you can check the time easily

and like if you like say you're waiting for your meeting to end you can glance at your watch you can't pull out your fucking phone and and see what time it is and no, I'm a YouTuber. Oh, man. That guy's iPhone 8 really brings out his outfit. No, but they'll be like, oh, wow, that guy's got a nice watch. He's clearly somebody who gives a fuck about the way he carries himself and the way he looks. I wonder if that watch is nice and heavy. Oh, it's very heavy, high quality. You know, that's what you want.

Well read, Boogie. thank you that'll be two million dollars please gotta make up for that divorce oh my god the wings cut oh man i i didn't get that reference did wings want a cut of something uh i think he frequently asks for the revenue that the show made after he left. Ah! A lump payment, though. He went for that option. That must be a South Carolina thing. Ah, this is a divorce callback I'm following.

Alright, hey, how is Wings doing? I heard the drama earlier. Really good. Is he doing weight-wise, or is his channel doing well or i mean how he is blossoming checked up with him um good dear good dear yeah he he's he's actually he had a p at a really good december i know that i know he's earning quite a bit of money yay you know um and i think that like honestly i think the the like the drama and like the a lot of the rage

that he does is kind of part of the show. I pointed out the other day, I'm like, you guys ever notice that this supposedly poor guy is smashing a lot of $60 Xbox One controllers and a lot of $250 Turtle Beach headsets? They pay

for themselves, right? People are coming for the show. He should sell his smashed shit. Oh, yeah, no shit. Right. Right? Like a smashed Turtle Beach for $20 or whatever. I had somebody sign it or put his mark.

You know, remember when he grabbed the controller and tried to break it with his bare hands? I want that one. We know it's good. That's a high quality. The tensile strength of that ps4 controller is unmatched i had i had somebody offer to buy the xbox arcade for my original francis video for like 500 bucks and like nah that's too sentimental that's cool uh then when major nelson came to visit me i think if i remember correctly

i tried or either succeeded to getting him to sign it so it's somewhere out in the garage with a signed signed smashed xbox one. So I'm a major Nelson himself. I wonder what major Nelson does like during the course of a day. I've wondered all the time, man. Cause I. Clearly not a human. No,

I just fuck with it. He's a, he's a night. You know, a lot of people like feel like he's like all mechanical or whatever, but I've got to set down the showman showman side of himself. And like like he's a cool guy when he's like not being a showman but but then like he definitely does his job well like he does pr and he's just kind of like it's any it's any youtuber i mean every youtuber is on or off right every youtuber like has their their thing yeah i

think that's true all right and so you know when he's at these big events and he's doing that stuff stuff, he's on from the cameras rolling and then he's a certain way and then he's a little different afterwards. You know, nobody's like completely different. But I don't think that makes you fake. I've thought about this a lot, right? Yeah, I don't think so at all either. Taylor, I don't think he's being fake on the show, but I bet you'd meet a different Taylor if his mom was here you know in front of his girlfriend alone or in front of his guy friends everybody

has a different face that they put forward yeah like the way when you're putting on a show like this it's a bit different if I'm this crass and like just rude in public people won't want to hang out with me you make one little slip up and he jumps down

your throat. Like, you can't yet be more amicable in real life. But like, for this, it's no holds barred, of course. You're trying to be funny. You gotta be hyperbolic. Yes. I'm not like, Oh, do you have my expense report?

What did you notice that you did not give me my TND for the Applebee's that I ate at in Jacksonville. Of course not. A lot of people are like, man, Boogie's very different on YouTube than he is Twitch. And I'm like, because it's completely different shows. What I'm doing on YouTube is more like who I want to be as a person and who I am on Twitch is more like who I was when I was 15. And I was just trying to like put together an entertaining and weird and goofy show, uh, like stupid memes and stupid jokes to keep people entertained for a couple of hours at a time. But I'm on YouTube. I just want to like talk and just be like the person I want

to be. And then I'm, I'm neither of those people, right? Like in real life, in real life, I'm like a combination of those things. And then also very different. Uh, but I would never call any of it fake. It's still all genuine. It's still all who I want to be or who I'm trying to be or part of who I am, including like the other thing is like, Oh, we've seen screenshots of you using 4chan speak when you're over there at 4chan and calling something like an old fag or something like that. How do they know it's you?

Oh, because I've trip-coded on 4chan before. I don't understand what that means. So like, basically I posted on Twitter, hey, here's my trip-code so you'll know that it's me on 4chan and then when i posted i posted with the same trip code which is anonymous um so you have a no one will be able

to figure it out right so it's like basically a number right practically your login right well kind of kind of so if you don't want to be anonymous for a little while you can post under a trip code and you'll the people be able to tell that it's you posting over and over again and so then you tweet out that trip code and everybody's like oh that's clearly boogie and like i said i told somebody there like the 4chan fit board just before my surgery i was like all right you fucking beta cock why don't you get off your ass and actually hit the gym instead of like obsessing over what i do you know what the fuck doesn't matter what i do with my life what are you doing with your fucking life get off your fucking beta ass and and be the Chad that you swear you're going to fucking be, you pussy or whatever. And like, I'm just

using their language, right? The motivational speaker version of Puggy. Be the Chad that you want to be. Well, that's their language. I'm going to write a book called that. Right. And so like, I forget what they call like losers, but like a big ripped dude who's like banging chicks left and right,

that's a Chadad like an alpha man that's a chad those guys are named chad which is weird because my best friend who's a nerd is named chad and he's like not that guy at all but whatever any chats yeah um but like that's their terminology for it so i know some of the terminology so i'm using their terminology to deliver a message and they're like oh my god why is he saying these things? Because it's the language there. I would never, ever in my life call a homosexual the F word. I won't even use it in this context. But why refer to a poster on 4chan as a new fag? Yes, in that instance, I'll use that phrase

because it's a brand new word that means something completely different. It has nothing to do with homosexuality. In that instance, would I call a cigarette a faggot if I was in the UK? Sure, I would. And then they get mad at you like well context doesn't matter i'm like but it does but it does context is 98 of life right i don't know perception is 98 of reality context is angry so really calling cigarettes fags is is so bizarre to me that that's what you know kitty's british obviously and still say it oh absolutely yeah yeah that's a real thing like i met a british guy this summer who was here and he was and he's been here for a couple years and he's like uh he asked me for a fag and i was like i don't i don't smoke fags

get on grinder but i knew what he was asking for but uh would you uh boogie would you call somebody a candy ass or a Rudy Poo? I don't know what those mean, so probably not. You know, is that like, are those like, are those like derogatory? Those are like the censored ones. Like if you put in the N word or. Probably like maybe is it like a joking way of saying something? Like if I was like joking with one of my friends and I'm like, oh, you're such a fucking candy ass or something like that. And implying that he was being, I don't i don't know like weird or something but like would i ever call a

homosexual that phrase never in my life i would never insult a homosexual for being homosexual that's absurd yeah yeah of course i wouldn't want to do that but i wouldn't either i like the fact i like the word oh go ahead kyle sorry i i You know, I always think back to that movie Clerks 2 where like – Porch monkeys. Where he used the word – Yeah, he's trying to take – Porch monkeys. And they were like, holy – and Wanda Sykes like flips out and everybody's like, oh, that's a derogatory racist term.

You can't say that. And he's like, no. No, it's not. And he's like, we're taking it back. My grandma used to say it. That was a big part of his argument come to think of it she did used to call a broken beer bottle a nigger knife whoa maybe she was racist she was probably pretty racist yeah we were talking about uh about not calling uh not insulting gay people for being gay, which is good. We're a very progressive show, Boogie. And so we're all on board with that. I was watching a, and

you know, we talk about a lot of degenerate things on this program. And I found something so degenerate that it blows my mind to read it. And this is about, so there's this trend, a very niche, small trend in the gay community of people who want to get aids or want to get hiv have you heard about this oh what are they called they're called uh bug catchers or no uh bug hunters but why why why do they want to i need to i don't know like i think that they want to do it because it's like the pinnacle of degeneracy and like to hurt yourself. But I'm going to read some of these posts.

And this is from a YouTube – bug chasers. Thank you, Chiz. They're trying to chase bugs around and get HIV positive with this. So these are some posts from a forum in 2004. I'm just looking at a YouTube video screenshot that I heard it on, and so I'm going to have to read it from there. This is from 2004. This is in a thread about

wanting to get HIV and how much it all turns them on. Hey guys, I like crawling around the filthy floors of sex clubs looking for used condoms to empty into my ass. Does HIV die? What was that? What? Did I go out? No no you can't do perfectly oh i thought kyle blew out for

a second okay uh i like crawling around the filthy floors of sex clubs looking for used condoms to empty into my ass does hiv die when exposed to air or laying on the floor like that can someone get pause which poz that means like get pause hiv positive become hiv positive can someone get pause which POZ that means like get pause HIV positive become HIV positive Can someone get pause or any STDs by emptying used condoms into them if the viruses are indeed destroyed? It's another reason not to use condoms guys. I hate seeing them on the floor getting wasted So I like to put them to good use sometimes I drink the cum too but prefer to shove it in my ass because that gets me ready from when I find the next guy to cream my ass because that gets me ready from when I find the next guy to

Cream my ass in quotes if he's not too grossed out at the side of me on my hands and knees and just my jockstrap Picking up filthy condoms By the way a lot of friends think I'm nuts for walking around those dirty theaters barefoot. Luckily, I haven't stepped on glass or anything, but being barefoot is the best way to hunt for the used condom treasures. Plus, it feels great walking in cum and piss. It'd be great to hear from other guys into the same stuff. Does it turn you on taking a stranger's cum of unknown status, or do you prefer knowing he's Paz? Does it turn you on taking a stranger's come of unknown status,

or do you prefer knowing he's Paws? Response from another wonderful member of this community. When I was a young boy, 12 to 6, I always took out my father's used and filled condoms from the waste deposit and drunk it out. I did this a lot, 200 to 300 times. And the next guy comments, I'd like to find a fully used condom bite the end tip off then shove the whole thing in my hole then use my ass muscles to wring all the cum into my ass feels really hot especially if you don't know where or whose the

load was oh this is great! Do you want more? Yes! I'm picturing it a little like an icy pop. Oh, it's just... Okay, here's a little more. I met this dude online today. Big eight-and-a-half paws dick. I got him talking about it. Said his strain was strong.

Lethal. Toxic. Poison. My dick fucking sprang up, and I started begging him. I went over. I started hitting my pipe He did a slam. I Guess it means like they started. I don't know

He's jerking off. Oh fuck. Yes There's something to do. I went over I started hitting the pipe. Maybe crack pipe. Oh, yeah a slam Which is like heroin I think oh I like I'm using context clues because there was talking about blood in the next line, so I assume injection. I licked his blood off his arm. I have to have his strain. I wanted him to infect me so bad.

I was begging for it, and he went to the bathroom. He came back with a syringe full of his blood. I'd never had another dude's blood before. I stuck my hole up and he shot it inside me, scratching around. Then he fucked me and he shot, mixing his babies with his toxic blood. So fucking hot.

I know I'm gonna get a whole fuck flu from this shit. It's so strong. Then I went to the bookstore and let five dudes fuck me and grind it into me. I've never had something so hot inside me. I have to get it to take.

He's going to start knocking me up regularly. I can't wait until his shit is saturating me and producing inside me. Woof. I liked Woody's reaction, the laugh, because I know for a fact that Woody thought he was like he would like books a million after all of that? Yeah, yeah. I instantly thought like I was like is he going to buy a Bible? That was what was in my head.

Oh. No, that's horrific. And there's a little more if we want to hear some more. This is all in caps. So this guy's very excited about what's happening. What's better than shoving your face up the fat bubble ass cheeks of a guy and inhaling that natural butt funk and licking it, especially before fucking him wit just spit and shit on your dick? How lovely.

I do that a lot to the straight guys I fuck with that. Find out I'm bisexual. I get there's no pronunciation that there's no punctuation that's why i'm reading like this uh i get them high on weed and my face stays in their musty rank asses all the reekins dominicans and white fat baby harry to smooth rank ass on my face licking the shit crumbs in the butt clean before sliding your dick inside the hole using shit for lube hmm i don't think i caught the very beginning of this where what are you reading this from this is from a youtube video of this guy talking about like this like

making fun of this whole like pause thing wanting to get that and uh and i'm just paused on the different screenshots that he pulled uh There's a ton of these. There are neg for pause parties. According to this, if you put hashtag neg, N-E-G for P-O-Z, that there are like gang bangs where it's a bunch of people who want to get HIV going to get fucked. And of course when I say a bunch, I mean a bunch relative to the amount of people who should want HIV. If three showed up, it's a

stampede. This is outrageous. I'm looking to get knocked up by a bunch of Paz Tops. Not Paz? No problem. Lie to me and tell me you are. Not really knowing what you're dumping in my hole is what makes it hot. Gangbang will be in a

sleazy motel from 6 to 7 30 very punctual no load refused pause talk encouraged holy oh this is here's an even this is a good one kyle i think you'll enjoy it is everybody still okay with me reading these oh yes fuck them all right this one's newer from 07 or i guess these have all been between like 04 and these guys are all positive by now's newer from 07 or i guess these have all been between like 04 and these guys are all positive by now uh this from username bottom comes up uh i think i have a plan now to go off the meds possibly next year and work on taking as many different hiv strains as i can getting reinfected so that my viral load gets super high almost to the point of developing aids and then when i'm almost to the edge go back on the meds and get my viral load under control, all with the intent

of making my strain stronger and more potent for spreading. So hopefully, my strain will become resistant to all meds and possibly become a deadlier, mutated strain. And then, once I finally do develop AIDS, I do everything in my power to spread it and infect as many men as I possibly can until all the STDs take over and kill me. And maybe if I could find another AIDS-loving whore to take with me and maybe go on a mass AIDS spreading spree. deathbeds, wasting away from all the sickness and disease, and both be face down, asses up, still infecting men with our poison

until we finally die from all those delicious toxins. Now, the question is, do I want to die by age 30 or 28? This is the funniest shit. I feel so much better about myself right now. It's out of control.

Here's another good one about a guy who doesn't even really care if you want the pause. He's going to give it to you. I'm a biker living in London, UK, and I've discovered three major ways of pausing up unsuspecting negs, which is like someone who's negative. The first I discovered by accident when I was fucking a guy and the condom broke. I said I was sorry, and I was, but later on it made me smile.

Then I was doing another guy, and the condom broke when I put it on. I fucked him anyway, feeling guilty and horny as hell at the same time. Then I started pricking the rubbers in their packets. Now, when I started fucking, they'd split. But this doesn't always work. So now, to be extra sure, I go to clubs with a pair of nail scissors,

pick up a handful of condoms, go to the john, sit down and carefully cut open the packets, removing the condom and snip a bit off the tip. Then I roll it back up and slide it back into the packet. Then I look for guys who are into safe sex only. I've done hundreds of guys using this method over the years. Oh, my God. The second method,

because we're going to get all three methods here, gentlemen. The second method is more work, but more fun. I chat up negs online who want to bear back with other negs. I say, I tested neg one month ago. I think because I only top, I've always tested neg. If they want, I tell them I'll pull out before shooting. I never do. There's loads of guys into being fucked by a guy in bike leathers and crash helmet.

So I do them like that the first time. Then I get more intimate, smiling and kissing passionately. I make sure I fuck them at least five times. Then I stay in touch with them to see how they get on I've done about 20 guys using this method over the years, and I've only failed once when they tell me they've tested pause I say oh god. How did that happen? Do you think I should get tested too? Thank God for chat rooms They can't see how much I'm smiling This the third method God for chat rooms. They can't see how much I'm smiling. This? The third method. The third method is the most

dangerous and the hottest. I had a biker mate, and for a while we'd round together using the above two methods. One night we couldn't find anyone, so we rode up to Hampstead Heath, London's cruising area. We wandered about till we saw a cute young asian guy he was a bit drunk i think it was his first time on the heath we smiled said hello

and led him to a quiet part of the heath i started kissing him while my mate pulled down his pants then my mate pinned him to the ground and using just spit for lube raped his ass i held him down and pushed his face into the mud to stop him screaming. When my mate finished, it was my turn. After we finished, we both pissed on him and told him we both had HIV. We left him there, sobbing, soaked in piss with our paws loads in his cunt. I still get hard thinking about it. That one's not funny. That one's rape.

That escalated, right? That was rape and murder. Wait, how did they choose the guy? That's mate. That's mate. That's mate. You can't just mate somebody. When you think about it, all of that... I can't believe you guys just got offended at the third one of those

because it was forceful. All of those, he's trying to kill somebody and getting off on it. Like trying to bleed all over people. I mean, technically, you're right. Let us know in the comments box. Which of these is worse? I just thought...

Excuse me. The murder... We're always talking about how ridiculous our show is, and I think that is the most degenerate thing that we've ever had on the show. He's a mappist. He's a mappist.

Or a murderer. thing that we've ever had on the show he's a mappist he's a mappist or a murderer i like me he makes them to death wow wow wow wow anyway i thought that was entertaining that's fucking hysterical not because i i that that because hundreds of people are going to die now no of course not it's i don't know what about that just that may that's the hardest i've laughed in so long that that was it's because it's someone expected you can't imagine someone that horrible and evil to have your fetish be giving someone an autoimmune disease and I again I don't really I can't I try to empathize as often as I can

just doesn't make any fucking sense to me no they call it uh they'll be like oh I want the gift they call HIV the gift so they'll say like some are like gift givers if they give HIV and other ones are hiv the gift so they'll say the like some are like gift givers if they give hiv and other ones are looking for the gift but what can how could it possibly be fun because as soon

as you get it you got it and it's not going away like but maybe that's like super awesome every day you're like yay i have it i have it there's a there's i saw a documentary once about like guys who felt they had too many limbs, and so they wanted to remove their own limbs. an emergency room and then parked in the parking lot and then took some big bags like freezer bags or maybe trash bags or something filled with uh um dry ice and dumped him on his legs and then like with a mouthful of painkillers just sat there as long as he could stand to do it and then you know obviously that's not how you do it right called the rescue squad and because otherwise they weren't going to do it for him. You just, you tourniquet, you tourniquet the thing

and then it dies. I don't know. I spent $400 on all this dry ice. You tell me all I need was a rubber band? God damn it. But this is,

this is how the guy did it. I could have gotten a better prosthetic. He ended up, he ended up going that method and then they removed his legs and so they interview him afterwards and he's like how do you feel and he goes i still don't feel complete um it doesn't it didn't work and i'm like so i

can only imagine a lot of these guys would get you know hiv and then be like wow this isn't what i wanted now how much is my prescription pills a month oh five eight hundred dollars okay well hiv medicine has gotten so has become so effective that they can't even they become negative because you're like i heard um technical magic johnson is in that situation now that his hiv is so under control that he tests negative it's not detected yes so it's not going off so it's not the thought so it's not the docs the guy i do know someone who told me um i know i'm over the internet but he said i i am now to the point that i can have bareback sex with somebody else and not get them infected but i won't risk it and i'm like okay that's interesting but he's like they told me that i'm so such in remission that I cannot possibly transfer the disease.

But does he still have it? Do they know? If they can't detect it, and if he can't pass it on, what happens if he stops? I guess if he stops the medication, I'm sure it would come back and start taking over. Because I think, you know, I don't know. Yeah, I would guess. I don't know. I'm guessing. Yeah, I wonder. Has anyone done it?

I mean, I haven't. I haven't taken HIV meds in ages, and I'm still negative. Yeah, me too. I mean, I don't know. I can't guarantee it. I might not be. I sit on a lot of toilet seats. The weight loss journey would have been a bit

easier on you. That's my secret. It's Kyle's. I'm a bug hunter oh my god I think both are acceptable oh I was going to what you said either one's good

when you say bug hunter I picture like a cute kid with one of those like a little miniature safari helmet and a net and like a khaki jacket like running through a meadow looking for like butterflies and beetles and shit not a degenerate homosexual crawling around the cum stained floor of a of a book club looking for condoms to shove up his ass i thought you're gonna find one who was like i like to collect a lot of loads into a condom and then tie it in a knot,

then freeze it and stick the frozen cum sickle up my ass. Takes all day to melt. Oh, but it's worth it. Ugh. Yeah, then I'm all paused up, and then I go, rape an Asian kid. That's so fucked. It is so fucked. Then I go, rape an Asian kid. That's so fucked. It is so fucked. Then I go rape an Asian kid.

Should we segue to the gymnast doctor here? Yeah, that's like pretty benign compared to what we just did. Oh, come on, gymnasts. There's tons of Asian gymnasts. I think he molested like 150 people. Yes, 107.

Yeah, something like that. I think he got 175 like 150 people 107 yeah it's something like that i think he got 175 years maybe that was my confusion almost a year to serve them all i think he's gonna get off easy the judge said he's like i'm signing your death warrant or something like that he's like you know you're gonna die in prison i'm jokes on you i got like 50 years left fucker right i'm a molester i'll get murdered three days in he's like no i mean you know i already got i just got 40 years for the child porn conviction you know from last year so tack him on big man what's 175 more he's done yeah yeah you're gonna sentence me to 80 years make it a make it a million. That's what I'm getting at. I sentence you to a million billion years.

It's like, no. That's when you can really show your ass, I think, in the courtroom. Like, oh, 175? Go fuck yourself. 200? Go fuck yourself twice. Just be in there like, do I hear 400? Do I hear 400 years?

400 years, anybody? Oh, 500 years. Give me 500 years. What if you try to grope one of the defendants who was coming in to rat on you, right? What are they going to do? Give you more years? Get another grope in before it's over.

You spank your own defense attorney? You're going to throw another 10 on there? Do it, man. Oh, your hamster's a little worn out here? Get off of me! I'm a doctor. But he fondled so much top-notch pussy. Oh, Kyle, are you offended?

Are you offended by this, Kyle? They were children. Not all of them. No, the one I watched was a college senior now no no at the time

she was a gymnast in college I'm not up on the whole thing I just saw the testimony of this collegiate senior and she explained she had

something wrong with her legs or her knee or something and her teammate suggested that she go to this guy. And he's like massaging her and it hurt, I think. And he's like, hey, there's a way I can relieve the pain.

But, you know, it's kind of invasive. And he like slips a finger in her pussy while he's like working her knee. And afterwards, she's like, yeah, she told like her mom about it. And her mom is like, dude, that is not okay. That is not normal. And she's like, no, the guy's a doctor. He knows more about medicine than you, mom. And her teammate was like, yeah, that's typically how he does it.

We all have our own techniques, but it's working. But my quads have never felt better, so he's my favorite. That's why I sent you. Didn't you just say earlier in the show that orgasms were good for pain relief? I did, and it's true. I don't know the chagasm, though. I think she just felt really uncomfortable. You should have been a character witness for this, man.

No, no, no. An expert witness. Oh, God. I like the way you're thinking. I'm for hire. Every time I come on the show, I wonder why. You mean you didn't enjoy all the pause talk, and now Woody's tacit defense of the serial pedophile? No, I don't know.

Don't get me wrong. Someone has to defend the serial pedophiles. We know you're the one. You're the most qualified. It kind of circles back to who's the guy, Lord Greyjoy, right? The one who lived his version of a perfect life until he was like, what, 90 or 100? Those are the Walder Greys. Yes.

The Walder Freys, rather. The Freys, that's what I'm going for. Thank you. The Freys, right? He lived his version of a perfect life, and then like a year or two before he was going to die anyway, they murdered him. You know what? That's a better deal than most people get.

They don't live a perfect life. He didn't have a kingdom and a dope castle protecting the twins. He molested a bunch of children. That's his version of a perfect life, right? I was listening to Brendan Schwab. Brendan Schwab is a UFC fighter I've mentioned this before. He says, you know what?

If I had a choice between my life this the the collegiate football the lights the ufc heavyweight knocking out crow cop and then the podcast and then die at 50 versus an ordinary life that dies at 75 sign me up for the 50 i'll take it every time oh do you know how do you know how fucking easy it is to say that when you're already a person who succeeded like if he were a normal normal Joe and he was an accountant somewhere at his current age, you think he'd be able to answer that question as honestly? Of course not.

He knows he's not going to die at 50, and it's not a real question. So he can just take that road of, man, my life's been so intense and awesome. I would prefer to die at 50. It's like, oh, yeah, really? Really, buddy? Like you already know there's no alternative. I don't know. It's just a meaningless little –

When I heard it, my thought was, oh yeah, we'll see how you feel at 45. If you're like, yeah, that was a good ride. It's all I needed. But here, this serial pedophile, right? He's living his version of a perfect life. Now, granted, the second half is in jail, but maybe

that's what he would have picked. I think it's way... Well, how old is he? Chiz, how old is this pedophile? 40. 40... Oh. Wait, so... Man, that's...

I didn't read the details of it. So he really would just, like, be given the girls, like, thigh massages or, like, leg gymnastics, whatever they do. And then he would, like, put a finger in their vagina and just be like, Oh, now, now, this is the Nassar twist to the whole thing. I only listened to one testimony, but that's really what hers was, yeah. And she said the person who suggested she go there had the same treatment, so that's two of the girls. It's crazy.

How did it not come out sooner? Like how in like that many girls did none of them be like, does he put his finger in your vagina? Like, yeah. I wonder what he's like socially it helps right because it's he's coming off to me as a master gaslighter right for 20 years maybe he's doing this and convincing these girls hundreds of them they are children so they're impressionable right but some of the we keep harping on the 12-year-old. The one I watched really was a senior in college.

And her teammate was a collegiate athlete too. So like they weren't all babies. They were in their 20s and such. And he managed to gaslight them and make them think that this was normal. This was okay. The doctors, yeah, they sometimes slip a finger in. Helps with the distraction. I bet he did way worse stuff to the young girls too which is sick i don't know i i hope uh i hope somebody

from i don't know what are the gangs the ms-13 or the aryan brotherhood i hope one of them like is right there at the gate of prison to say hello and to welcome him to the to the fold you know i i hope he gets a couple of spork stabs i've heard support i've heard several times that like the pedophiles and rapists that go to prison get treated extra bad you know the all the armed robbery guys are looking down on the pedo guys i've also heard that those are the people with the best social skills and they manage to really flourish in the prison environment. That they have good relationships with the prisoners and the guards

and, you know, just find a way to succeed there. I don't know what the truth is. Maybe both are the truth. Maybe. It's just crazy that you could do that to so many people over such a long period of time and have nothing happen. Yeah, like, is he a master?

It's so many people, it's like, it's almost unbelievable. When it's like 150? He literally penetrated her vagina and anus. And at another visit, unhooked her bra and massaged her bare breasts with a visible erection. He had his erection visible?

Well, you know. Through his pants, I assume, but I'm not sure. How old was this person that he was dating? Fifteen. Oh, here's one. For years, he was the only person who could help me recover from multiple

serious injuries. To me, he was like a knight in shiny armor. Alexis Moore, who said Nassar molested her starting when she was nine. See, that ties into my theory that this guy, he's a sicko, but he's a manipulative genius, right? Well, I mean, you're not wrong. Like a lot of sexual predators and or especially pedophiles like they can be kind of smooth in the way they do it because that's obviously you know what they want more than anything is to indulge their you know grotesque

fantasies and so they have to try and be sly to get to make the victim think it's normal or their fault i bet this guy yeah like this guy he molested children in his home it's the same reason that like you'll see a lot of pedophiles in positions like working at a daycare or being a um a a priest or being someone who massages gymnasts like if it puts you in close proximity with children where you can be alone with them they like careers like that you know and so the But in those careers, you kind of have to play up, oh, I'm just Dr. Nasser or Nurser, whatever his name was. I'm just the friendly guy who massages your daughter's thighs. I would never molest her and every other girl who comes in here for 20 years.

Her supple thighs. There's parental neglect going on here too. there's parental neglect going on here too like i would never have like a 12 year old a nine year old daughter alone with some doctor like that's true too like you should be there he's the team doctor like like you know it's yeah but still like it's his job to massage them at nine years old if you had a nine-year-old girl bookie who was into gymnastics would you be okay with her going alone into a massage area or would you be like no i'm gonna sit in the corner at least to make sure everything's above board i hope to god i never have a fucking nine year old girl geez i don't i hope i never have a girl to begin with i don't want to bring a girl

into this fucking world are you kidding me oh my god what a shit show with pieces of shit like that traveling on the you know they're traveling on the road on these competitions. They're traveling internationally throughout the country, abroad. Some of these girls are too young to be left alone. Nine, 12, et cetera. They're not alone. They're with Dr. Nassar. There was no situation in which my nine-year-old would have been vulnerable to that.

School field trip? That's not alone. That's definitely not like... Okay, you're right. But there were no overnight school field trips. They were just trips to the gallery. And we chaperoned most of those, either Jackie or I. Yeah.

At the very least, we have two... Wait, nah. Damn it, I was trying to think of a better solution what two doctors now you're in some sort of double team situation Jesus Christ you fucking sicko Taylor I think that the other doctors there were two doctors you guys are

degenerates it's the same logic my logic there is the same as never bring one Mormon fishing because they will drink all your beer. You have to bring at least two Mormons to any kind of function that has alcohol

because they will keep each other from doing it. We better get rid of that so it doesn't corrupt anyone I don't think we have a single Mormon listener at least not after that pause talk

because we had the Mormon guy in the hangout that guy was awesome I like that guy and his girlfriend was also Mormon and her dad was a polygamist. And she was talking about, you know, we were asking her, and she's like, well, what if he wanted to bring a couple more ladies into the fold?

And she was like, eh, I don't think I'm really into that. It was a soft no. It was a soft no. It was practically soft no. It was a soft no. It was practically a yes. If you said that to – if Jackie were on right now, sitting next to you in the same way that she was sitting next to him, and I was like, what if Woody wanted to bring another lady into the fold? I mean, he's got his needs.

She'd be like, he can have her all to himself because I'll be somewhere collecting my alimony checks. Well, guys, real quick, I stream on Twitch in about an hour. I needed to get a little break here before I go, so I'm going to say goodbye to you. Not that I haven't enjoyed all the molestation talk. Oh, yeah.

It's been, well, I probably won't have an erection for about another year, so thank you. You made dating a lot easier. Boogie, keep your chin up. Crazy people are crazy. Don't pay attention. Hey, man.

Thanks, man. Hey, don't worry. I'm killing it, man. I am, you know, with all the divorce and everything else, man, I feel happier than I'm probably supposed to, and I'm surprised that I'm happy at all. So I'm just enjoying it, man. I appreciate you. Appreciate you.

I will be back on when I can I'll talk to you guys soon thanks for having me thanks man alright well that was interesting it's been a lot of good topics so far I feel like I wish I could take a breather just like him

I feel like I've been saturated with bug catchers and child molesters and I feel like I wish I could take a breather just like him. I feel like I've been saturated with bug catchers and child molesters. I feel so dirty. There's going to be a shower after this show for sure. Are you going to change your pants? No, I don't change my pants. These are brand new. I got these today. These won't be...

I literally wore those others until March. Kyle, do you not go to stores to get your clothes either? You order everything off Amazon? No, that's not true. I always go to stores. All right, so if it's a shirt, then I order that online because I know my size. I usually get a slim-fitting large or an athletic-fitting medium.

And if I'm getting pants, though, I never really know. I'm a 33 length which doesn't fucking exist for some reason. It's either 32 or 34. 32 is a high water look which is super lame. 34, I'm a gangster.

You get holes in the back. I can't find an in-between. And so I've really got to go shopping and look for pants. Or have them hemmed, I guess. Just go to Nordstrom and get them hemmed. The nice Russian ladies who do it are really quick.

I have a Jamaican tailor. He's a nice guy. I really enjoy going over there and talking to him about his life. I have a Jamaican tailor. Say something, tailor. Oh, don't be putting me on the spot like that.

Great. That's all I wanted. I know it's been practicing. I'm not a Jamaican. That's perfect. I'll bring back a Jamaican next week. Yeah. I like going and seeing the tailor guy.

He's always got fun stories about his customers, and he talks my ear off, and he costs $20. So I usually do that. But yeah, I go shopping if I'm getting pants. But that's about it. Lately, I've been ordering everything else online. If I go shopping, I spend a lot of money. If I go to like a... How much is a lot?

A grand. If I go to like a... How much is a lot? A grand. If I go to like a Bloomingdale's or something like that. Yeah, if I go into a Bloomingdale's or something like that, inevitably I get hooked up with some hot chick who's like the fitting chick. She's like, let me help you pick out some outfits.

And I'm like, alright. And then I'm trying... Things pick out some outfits. And I'm like, all right. And then I'm trying. Things get out of hand. And we start picking out outfits. And next thing I know, I've got $400 or $500 worth of jeans and $400 or $500 worth of tops, which isn't a whole lot of clothes at Bloomingdale's. $400 worth of jeans at a nice place is two pairs of jeans. Jeans are $200? Yeah. at a nice place is two pairs of jeans. Jeans are $200? Yeah, and you would be shocked

at how much better a pair of $200 jeans looks, like a nice straight leg pair of jeans, than fucking Wranglers or whatever nonsense Levi's that just look shitty. You don't look like Bob Dole. You don't look like a... Although, honestly, the pajama jeans, they're $50. They're better than...

They're not as good as, like, Luckys or... I always fuck it up. It's not Children of Humanity. No, Citizens of Humanity. I always say Children of Humanity for some reason. It's Citizens of Humanity, though. I like those jeans a lot. Buffalo.

I have some Buffalo jeans. That's another good brand. I wanted to show my jeans and defend inexpensive jeans, but they're way too big and only stay on because I'm wearing a belt, and I can't defend them at all. I'm sure they look terrible. Is there little folds, like cinches, because the belt is thin? Yeah, yeah.

And if I don't wear a belt it if it's fresh out of the wash then you know i could like walk across the house but if it's been a few days literally three steps and they fall right off or you could pull them with no effort it's does it have like those little straps on the side of your leg where you can like slide a hammer in if you were like no i don't even know what they are the the color is kind of modern they're like dark and distressed but um yeah dark jeans always look better i think yeah this style has changed i've been playing a shitload of fallout lately um i i've got let me look how many mods i have installed. Let me try to...

I have... That's actually not that many. I have 60 mods installed. I see people on the forums who have 150 or 200. It is a completely different game when you put that binny in. All of the... Like, the storyline changes. Like, you add new quests.

You add new locations. You can... The game looks completely different. My character is this red headed chick with enormous tits and a the the mod to make her big her ass bigger was called oatmeal bitches or something like that or maybe cake booty i think yeah yeah she's just a a freak show and the best part is i was like, this is a little misogynistic. This mod is literally...

Yeah, I was like... Because the mods go in-depth. There are like eight different vaginas you choose from. I think you all know which one I went with. There's like eight different pubic hairstyles. What'd you go with? Well, it's

so immersive, Woody. See, I'm able to choose different pubic hairstyles for different characters. So all the bad girls have landing strips, but all the good girls are shaved or waxed, as the mod dictates. My chick is wearing currently a latex transparent zipper suit where the zipper only covers her vagina, but you can take it right off if you want to. And my companion,

Piper, who I have turned into just a freak show. Just gigantic tits. And I added a physics mod so the tits are all jiggly and just going everywhere and uh and and she's just kind of naked all the time running around with this giant gatling laser that's like how he's completely different game so far is focused on pubic hair tits and bouncing

and ass these are just well i've also added a season in high heels it's like a new game i do have high heels i did i added a mod that adds seasons to the game so normally fallout is like a wasteland of like dead trees and barely any grass and mostly just rocks and blown up cars and now it's like a deciduous forest that's super lush and you can only see like the view this is really limited because you're in a forest everywhere you go and the seasons are constantly changing so sometimes it snows and the snow is just blowing in your face and it looks really good I've added I've added mods to to add lots of new locations.

Let's see. I've added a ton of modern weapons into the game. What is your plan, Fallout 4? Fallout 4, yeah. So tons of modern weapons and all kinds of edits for the weapons. Lightning storms. I've changed all the enemies, like retextures for everything.

There are completely new characters made that can be companions for you. I've got Heather Caston. Should I know Heather? No, of course not. She's a made-up person. I'm a big fan of this so far. I think I played 50 hours in the last two weeks or something like that of just Fallout.

And I'm really enjoying the modding process. It's mostly straightforward. Just click and it installs. But there's a lot of file editing and preference editing and stuff. And getting it to run in ultra-wide 3440 wide by 1440 was kind of challenging, but I'm obsessed with it right now. I'm looking forward to after the show getting on there and seeing what my

newest mods are going to do. You currently have one ultra-wide monitor. That's your choice? Yeah, and I mean it's 34 inches wide, so it's like I can't imagine. I've seen people online on our battle stations that have three of these things, and that's just absurd to me.

I don't know what they're using to power it. I need a new computer. I think that I'm going to give this computer to Kitty or sell it to her for some extremely reduced rate because she's talking about getting a new computer, and I'm thinking sell this one to her for $1,000 or something like that and build myself a new one.

I was looking on iBuyPower earlier and just thinking about maybe getting one there because I think maybe I'll get a better deal on the graphics card and actually save money, which sounds ridiculous, but the bit mining has raised the prices of fucking GPUs.

It's stupid. It's stupid. The 1080s are like, just the bare bones ones are $800, and the one like I've got is like a grand, and the 1080Ti's are like $1,200, $1,300, $1,400. The bit miners are fucking buying up huge packets of them. I saw a deal today where you could buy, I think, six 1080's for like $7,000 or something like that. They're selling them in big bundles.

It's, it's really frustrating for someone who really just wants more frame rate in my video games, right? Like, it's, it's, it's really shitty for the people who still mine with graphics cards it's the most efficient way it's not the asics miners are the most efficient way it is oh they make dedicated chips for mining stuff and interest yeah and even those i'm told with the way that like bitcoin i know is more expensive to mine it than it is to just buy it maybe chisels typing he'll probably yes chisel chisel have the download they aren't mining bitcoin they use asics for bitcoin but gpu farms are set on programs to mine the most profitable coins at the time. Oh, okay. Well, there you go. I'm looking at this.

I want a rack-mountable system. That's part of my challenge. I wonder if they do anything in rack-mountable. I don't know about that. I think I may do iBuyPower and just buy an assembled pc because they have like overnight shipping it seems like like next day shipping and uh and they'll actually have gpus in stock at an affordable price i feel i feel like they're discounting their gpus like like you can add a gpu to their build far cheaper than you could actually build one it seems i was just glancing earlier but i don't know what i'm gonna do i don't i guess i'll get a 1080 ti but i could get two

1080 ti's i've got my 4k monitor behind me on the floor 1080 ti has been the thing for more than a year and that's uncommon i think no uh it just It just came out in December or something like that. I might be mixing the TI with the other one. Yeah, the 1080 is the one that... Yeah, with the non-TI. Chiss says it came out... Oh, the Titan came out in Q4. That's okay.

I haven't played a video game in three months. Unless you count Tinder. Yeah, man. And I don't played a video game in three months. Unless you count Tinder. Yeah, man. And I don't. Taylor's one of those iPhone gamers. Yeah, I'm one of those mobile gamers. I don't know. I just have not had a drive to play any video games.

I bought Call of Duty and NHl 18 like maybe two months ago and i was and i i swear to god i spent more time waiting for those two to download than i did playing either of them combined because i played like maybe three hours of cod and then got bored turned it off turned on nhl played maybe an hour of that and like this is the same thing again shock of all shock shock of all shocks and then i turned it off i haven't haven't touched it since taylor do you talk to somebody new on tinder every day like is is every day there no you don't get a response daily uh well it depends like i haven't really been using it as much recently to be honest like in the past couple weeks uh at your peak was there a girl every day i was talking to new people every day definitely at the peak of my use like of course like you

gotta well i don't know your seeds out there and you know uh the conversational seeds i mean you never know what's gonna occur. Johnny Apple Seed over there. Not your pause seeds. Oh, yeah. So I want to find some poor unsuspecting girl and give her a pause load.

And then I'll go with my degenerate friends and pee on some Asian kid. Say, aha, we're HIV positive. Your life's over. I bet you thought you had a bunch of plans. A bunch of plans for love and fun. Nope. Not me. Mr. HIV positive degenerate mental illness person. But anyway,

yeah. When you're trying to really use Tinder a lot, you have to be talking to as many people as possible because that's obviously how you're going to meet the most people. But I haven't been very active on it the last couple years. We watched you go through your evolution from noob to pro, right? I think it's fair to say you're going to meet the most people. But I haven't been very active on it the last couple of years. We watched you go through your evolution from noob to pro, right? I think it's fair to say you're a T-pro, an e-gamer. I don't know.

I'm looking for some parallel. Did you swipe on everyone after you got good, or did you get selective? What is the pro tip there? Pro tip would be be selective. Okay. Because you went went through you started selective and then you dropped it and came back around yes in some iteration of that yeah uh and it turns out it really is better just to be selective because otherwise you're getting a bunch of swipes from people where it's like i'm 34 years old i've've got six kids, and I'm looking for love. If you're just looking for a hookup, then you've got another thing coming.

And I've got a lot of cats, so you better not be alert. Boogie would turn his nose up at that in a heartbeat. And it's like, oh, okay, now this person matched with me. And so that means I, in one of those blind flurries, must have swiped on her. And so I'll just ignore it. So it's not a big deal either way if that cliff of uh boogie talking about dating isn't on begging choosers i i i'll give you a hundred dollars that's happening that was that that was pretty interesting it's like you know what's happening yeah i want a i want a hundred poundpound, 5-foot-tall model, you know.

I mean, come on. Who doesn't want a 100-pound, 5-foot-tall model? 110-pound, be fair. Yeah, but Kyle, she also doesn't want to be committed and just wants to fuck all the time and doesn't want to hang out or spend time or develop relationships the way women are wont to do. And she's okay with him fucking around. And then he's, yeah.

So really, there's not one woman on this planet that fits that description. I swear to God. If you showed me one, I'd pull a mask off and it would be a Scooby-Doo villain. Not a model, but... Mr. Jankers! I was just trying to get a pause load.

You know? It had to be a pause load. It had been for you metal kids. Oh my god. That pause load talk had me rolling. I was shocked. That was crazy.

I have a topic. I don't know where it'll go. But I found it to be really interesting. Two Canadian... Wait, I think I added an extra key. Two Canadian billionaires were murdered in execution style. I guess when the police looked into it, it looked like a suicide.

And this is on news.sky.com i have no idea how reputable that is but for the purposes of the show it's totally reputable and uh the the police looked into it said that uh they they couldn't because they were like hung hanged what is the past tense of being hanged hanged you say and uh only with people is it hanged everything else it's on Hanged, you say? Only with people is it hanged. Everything else is hung. Roger that.

So they were hanged, but the police missed that there were signs that their wrists were tied up. And apparently they reinvented the pharmaceutical business in Canada. And he announced that he was coming out with a book that would give people cause to kill him. I'm looking for the specifics of it in here now. Sounds like a movie. Doesn't it? Was he a real billionaire or a billionaire in Canada bucks? Probably

Canada bucks, which is pretty close. Shucks, where is it? I'm sure it's right in front of me strangled up there do you see the part about the book yet uh is it removed oh it was it was this guy and his wife yes okay i thought you meant like two independent billionaires were like hanging out. Oh, no, no. Yeah, he and his wife were the billionaires. And I can't find – I swear that I read this and I read it carefully.

And he was coming out with a book exposing the people who tried to undermine him. What he basically did to earn – to become a billionaire was come up with generic pharmaceutical drugs. And he kind of revolutionized the way that generics work in Canada, so the article said. And he was coming out with a book about the people who kind of played dirty to stop him from introducing inexpensive drugs to the market.

And now that all seems to be missing from the article. More foul play. Interesting. Yeah. Or it was wrong, and they issued a correction to the article no no no no that's not what happened yeah bernard sherman was ceo of apotex inc died december 15th

man well i guess well i'm trying to figure out what he did that people didn't like. Sold medicine? Yes. Like, expensively? Inexpensively. Undercutting multi-billion dollar corporations. Yeah, and then apparently, when I read it, the article said that he was going to come out with a book that kind of explained how the other corporations played dirty

to prevent inexpensive medicine from coming to market. Like price of stuff or maybe or you know i don't know working to make sure he can't come to market or something like that she looks wonderful for 70 by the way she does but she's got a billion dollars of canada bucks to keep that face up yeah you know yeah and he looks like she married him for money. He looks like a proud father right there. Much older looking than her. Yeah, but I'm sure her hair has died. Anyway, back when the conspiracy was still in this article, it was super interesting. Now it's just a murder, I guess.

She says he was the bane of the existence of the branded drug companies in Canada. He was not their favorite person, but he was respected. Not respected enough to not be murdered. Hmm. Why are people eating Tide Pods? Yeah. Why are they eating Tide Pods? Are we too old to understand the fascination in eating detergent?

Absolutely. I definitely am too old. We don't know the way. I definitely don't get Tide Pods. The eating Tide Pods meme continues to be one of the more baffling parts of 2018, which is impressive

since we're just four weeks into the year. But the ramifications of the meme continue to rise. Earlier this week, the American Association of Poison Control Centers, the AAPCC for short, released another alert

warning consumers not to eat the laundry pods. The number of reported cases of teenagers intentionally eating laundry detergent-filled gel capsules this year has more than doubled from 39 incidents on Januaryuary 16th on january 16th to 86 as of january 22nd that was three days ago shit they 39 cases there were 39 cases of it in the entirety of 2016 and 53 in the entirety of 2017 and we've got got 86 by January 22nd of 2018. At what point

do we start blaming the pods for being so tasty? I was thinking they should just put something in the Tide pod to make it taste really bad and then I thought, you know what? I bet there's something in there that tastes terrible already. It's the detergent.

I do remember as a kid, I don't know if Tide is still the same way, but it used to be a powder. It was white, and it had blue, like, sparkly crystals. It looked like candy. Maybe it still does. But they taught us in school that even though it looks like candy, it's really not. And they would put it like stupid people will sometimes eat it

because they're not like us. They don't realize it's not candy. I was about to ask. Were you in some special classes for them to talk about this? They didn't teach you not to use detergent in school? No. Can you try and find a real video of people eating a Thai pod, please? No, no.

We can't watch that on the show. Apparently YouTube is on a – Pod, please? No, no, we can't watch that on the show. Apparently YouTube is on a, what are Muslim people called? No, no, no, we're not going to show it. A jihad. YouTube is on a jihad against Tide Pod eating. If you so much as, like, yeah, you can't do it. No, no, but we're not going to show it. We're just going to talk about it.

It's delicious. I would like to see it. I've never seen it. It's hard to find a video. Yeah, a live leak, I bet, will have one. I can find 15 videos of people being beheaded in the Middle East right now, if I want to.

I can find videos that Kyle knows. As soon as I type in LiveLeak, it auto-filled to Tide Pod. Okay, well, let's see what we got on LiveLeak. Oh, this guy's a bug hunter. This guy's a bug hunter. This guy's a bug hunter. Maybe some superstar hip hop? I feel like

it's bigoted for me to say. No, he's got the... I'm just going to kind of like, maybe like soften a little bit. That's why I think it's bigoted for me to say. Oh, you're right. That actually does... ...how to eat a hip hop and nothing really came up. That's literally the definition.

Oh, yeah. Confirmed, it tastes terrible. Are we going to cue? Oh, I'm sorry. I ran ahead. We should have cued. It's my mistake. Alright, ready, set, play. Salting it a little bit.

Yeah. Salting Gage Dears, so he's clearly a guy who makes a decision all right he's in front of a rainbow flag too he bit it and it popped in his mouth he's foaming and now he's like oh no this tastes like detergent he like bit it like with this front like like and it burst his mouth like he didn't put it in his mouth chew it like with his front teeth. Like, and it burst his mouth. Like he didn't put it in his mouth to chew it. Like a...

Oh, here's another one. This is a montage. Oh, this guy's got the whole thing in his mouth. He's trying to crush it. His friends are telling him he has to. Keep in mind, this guy's in camo. This man is protecting our country. I really think he is a soldier.

How did you possibly do this? How do you not know you're probably gonna die? All of them are drooling out of their chin too. It's not a good look. Oh this genius. Pussy. Well they are one step ahead of me at making it taste bad. That guy popped the whole thing in his mouth right away. It's so gross. Well, they were one step ahead of me at making it taste bad. It's like 14 years old. That guy popped the whole thing in his mouth right away.

This guy's chewing it. Oh, then he spit it out. Look at this guy. Oh, this is on LiveLeak, by the way, if you guys want to hunt this down. The Tide Pod Challenge. Yeah. That guy didn't make any noise guys not even a teenager what's the place putting a detergent as a chaser haha I put liquid charge it on the pod

like it's like like sweet and sour sauce on crab rangoon. The older people are way better at this challenge. And he had a fidget spinner. A girl! Oh, these girls have terrible gag reflexes. Yeah, they're not gonna cut himself on the plastic corner and he freaked out. Oh, drama king.

This guy, yeah. Pussy. He could not handle my love. No. And you'd think he could. He could not handle Kyle's pause load. Wow, we're only two thirds through this. I'm not getting tired of it.

This guy, I can't tell. If you want to queue up, there's 301, 302, 303. Yeah, that's where I'm at. Yeah, I'm right there. Yeah. I meant, like, the listeners. Oh, okay. I'm sorry. Oh.

It's not all about me. I thought it was either for me or for Chiz. I didn't know if he... Oh, that kid really got a good couple choosing. He snapped out of this with the text, they doubted me. They doubted me. I really like the dude that put the detergent on the Tide Pod and then ate it

and then chased it with some more liquid detergent. I can already taste it. I didn't even break it. You don't do this outdoors. Maybe don't do it at all. Don't do it at all. You're listening to this. This is not cool.

This is super lame. We're laughing at them. Do the cinnamon challenge. It's food. If you're going to do one, do the nutmeg challenge. You will be high as a kite and uncomfortable for days. Wait, what's the nutmeg challenge? You will be high as a kite and uncomfortable for days.

Wait, what's the nutmeg challenge? Did you know that? So there's a thing that if you eat a ton of nutmeg, I don't know how much, but it will make you high and trip. And I have friends in high school who it was probably like freshman year or something

and they were like, oh, I saw on the internet that if you eat a bunch of nutmeg, you know, you can get really high. And so we're going to go to Elliot's house, you know, on, uh,

after school on, you know, today on whatever Thursday it is. And we're going to clean his spice rack out. And we're going to, you know, first we'll stop by the store and pick up some fucking nutmeg, however much you need.

And then we'll dip on back and eat the nutmeg and i was like that sounds awful i'm not going and i have hockey practice so i can't go let me know how the nutmeg is you're like all right and so they went the next morning all of them but one of them it was like a group of five of my friends all of them but one was not at school and so i was like aaron what what the hell like where is everyone and like he was looking like bad too like i bags under his eyes like just look shitty and he was like oh dude drew ate like five spoonfuls or whatever and then we all ate some and i ate the least but i just couldn't muscle it down. And, you know, a couple of them, they were just throwing up for a while,

and then they kept saying the room was spinning so fast they couldn't get rid of it, and it didn't go away. And so the next Monday came around, and Drew, my buddy who went, like, all out, like, ate as much as he could, came to school on fucking Monday after he was comatose, doing nothing, all

a... Weekend. I didn't do it kyle i would not eat not make not you the person in the chat who's talking saying they they did oh okay i didn't even read not all about you well i don't read all of it yeah you're right that's narcissistic of me but uh my buddy who did it on that Monday, he was like, I still feel weird. Like it was four or five days. And he's like, my vision's not quite right. Like I'm, I just feel like shaky and,

and just feel sick. And so lesson to you kids, steal some booze from your parents, liquor cabinet, instead of eating nutmeg scissor. Yeah. Or drink, uh,

whatever rappers do. Codeine. Codeine. Don't actually do those things either. Yeah, this is terrible advice. Just have a down-home American cigarette. I wish I'd get strep throat. I'm looking for some Paz

loads of strep throat right now. So I can get some more of that delicious codeine that the doc prescribed. Dude. I'm glad we started this Paz Loads adaptation, because there's going to be a lot of fun ways to incorporate this. I'm looking forward to it. I could totally see how

you could get hooked on codeine syrup. I just had the one bottle. First of all, it's delicious. It tastes like candy syrup. And not in a sickly sweet kind of way but in like a oh yeah oh it's like have you ever gotten like a soft drink that they put too much syrup in and you're like it's like unusually good it's like that but even better it's just delicious and they i think it was cherry flavored like like like or yeah or maybe strawberry i think it was

cherry and he gave i had a huge bottle of this stuff for my strep throat and ah it was so good and it got you high it got you fucking high you like you just you take like two little sips of it and and you could feel the pain what is codeine is it a painkiller i know that but opiate you say so that's that's one of the things that like um i watch politics so much i'm trying to talk about it but chris christie led a commission where they were investigating i think opiate use right that the heroin epidemic is an opiate thing right yeah yeah and heroin's a huge problem all over the place but when they talk about opiate, they're talking about pain pills. Oh, and codeine doesn't fall under that?

I mean, technically it would, but that's not the – codeine doesn't get prescribed that often anyway, whereas pain pills are the thing because it's a pill, right? You don't have a big bottle of scissor. It's a big bottle this stuff comes in. It's wonderful. I wish I had strep throat right now and a big bottle of that stuff. It was super lame, though. I think I've mentioned this before, but when I got to Idaho, I got the prescription refilled there.

And in Idaho, I guess the state law makes them put in something in there that makes it taste like shit. So I went from the most delicious thing ever to like this bitter concoction. And I was just like, I'll just fight through the pain. I'll just fight through the pain. I don't even want it anymore. But it was,

I forget what I was prescribed, but when I broke my leg, I was in Nevada, I think, but maybe at my hotel was in California, even though they were only like planets apart. And, uh, I had a super hard time getting my pain getting my painkillers prescribed across state lines.

Like I actually couldn't get it done. So I just had crappy ones. That's lame. Yeah. I've been prescribed painkillers for... Actually, now that I think about it, that Tylenol 3 that I was prescribed for when I got my wisdom tooth taken out, that stuff was enjoyable.

I actually liked that. That was kind of like a light-headed, silly, goofy kind of feeling. That was kind of nice. How long until you were 100% after the wisdom teeth? There was no pain after a week for sure. But it bled for like two days, maybe three. And so it's doing this thing.

All right, so when they pried it out, like they went under it and like pried it out like you would pull a nail to get it out. And it came right out like in seconds, like I said said before but they definitely left a couple of chips of broken tooth down in there and those two of them now have worked their way out through the gum uh not the worst thing in the world you know it's it's it's not terrible but they basically like you know like like if you touch the inside of your gum with your tongue like it's on the tongue side of the gum line uh back there on the back right molar and uh it started it starts getting sore and then sore

and then sore and then you can kind of feel like it feels like a bit of bone protruding under the gum and then finally it breaks through and to the point where if i take my fingernail and like find it and tap it you know you can tell the difference between gum and tooth and then i pick it out and it's like oh that's a tiny little shard of tooth that they left in there two of them have come out so far i can feel a third working its way out i'm not satisfied with that dentist this is bullshit you should not have shards of teeth coming out of your head is what's the normal experience are you sure there's never any shards left

they should be careful i've googled i've googled apparently it happens but it they're not big shards they're like if you took If you imagine a grain of rice, maybe three-quarters the size of a grain of rice, but very weird and jagged. Like when you operate a drill press, the little filings of metal, how they're kind of twisted and sharp. That's a good way to get an infection, too.

If that's just hanging out in there. I got my smart mouth. It's all good. That handles everything. But every now and twice now I've picked it out. It's kind of painful when I like pull it out because like you're picking a piece of tooth through your gum. But I'm just like, oh, my fucking God. Yeah, that's a tooth.

That's tooth. I feel like you know a little bit what it's like to teeth right most people forget what teething is like but you're reminded at 31 i remember teething oh no i no i don't i'm talking about getting uh well you know you lose your baby teeth and new teeth grow and i remember that but that's not the same i don't think yeah that's not the same already open, yeah. I don't think anybody remembers teething. Do you have any interesting ways that you got rid of baby teeth?

No. Not even from your kids? Yeah. Well, I don't know how interesting it is. It's interesting when you're eight or whatever, seven, however old you are when you're losing baby teeth. I had a thing with my teeth that, like,

you know how some kids would, like, wait until it was hangling by one little tendril of gum tissue, and they're like, I'm not going to laugh. It's going to come out on its own. It's like, blow your fucking tooth out, you degenerate. Like, it's like, you're, like, breathing in. It's like, hee, hee, hee, hee, hee, hee, like a fucking doggy door in a hurricane, you know, just, like, flipping up's like like a fucking a doggy door in a hurricane you know just like

flipping up and down like that and i that i was the opposite of that like i would feel like a little bit of yeah and i'd be like this bitch is coming today and i would like go hard at it until i could get it out i don't know why in my little kid head it was like man the sooner i lose these the sooner the new ones are coming in the sooner the adult ones are coming did you do you have tooth fairy money i did but it's not like i could go anywhere like and spend it and they didn't have vending machines in my second grade classroom it's like money as a concept we did to me that's i mean that sounds pretty cool we didn't have that but uh i would like pull mine out like aggressively to the point like i'd be in class and like second grade and like pull one out

and like, I'd start bleeding on the desk. So I'd have to be like, Taylor, go to the bathroom. She pulled another tooth out. Yeah. I spent like, like a year and a half of my young childhood life with no, none of my top four teeth and none of my bottom two or three down here because I just pulled them out so early. But, uh, I did it where I tied like a string to one and I slammed a door for it to pull out. Um,

I tied like ready. Did it hurt? It came out. Yeah, I guess so. It probably wasn't like 100 ready and uh i i taped like i wrapped string around like a street hockey puck and tied the other end to my tooth and then i shot it you shot it yourself yeah and then it popped right out uh that one was ready

because like i wasn't about to like like like pulled like with it that but uh yeah I don't know it's not that interesting it's a little psycho I don't know anyone else who's done okay well well it's not that weird it's pretty weird little weird it's okay no I made all that up. I was lying. Oh, not weird. It's not that weird. That's all true. You've told that story before. I remember. That's weird.

I'm just being a character. What are you drinking? Strong drink. Carbonated water from my soda stream. I put my... Oh, go ahead. Do you want to go? I would tie a string to it and we'd tie it to the door and slam the door.

Yeah. That's pretty common, I think. Yeah. I bought a home gym. I think we talked about it on a PKN. And everything has arrived. I kind of let it queue up a little bit. And I'm about 80%.

I spent five and a half hours putting it together today. And I am almost done. I'm like, for my first workout, I'm putting this shit together. Yeah. And it was. I'm really happy with it thus far. Like, I was afraid it would be light.

You know you buy stuff on Amazon, and it shows up, and it's like one-third the size you thought it would be or everything. It's not. It's not flimsy. It's everything as you'd hope it would be or everything. It's not, it's not flimsy. It's not, it's everything is as you'd hope it would be. And, um, yeah, so I'm, I'm pretty psyched to, to have a little weightlifting. People don't know. It's like a, like a squat cage type thing and a bench. So I can do bench press and it has like a lat pull down and row type deal and some weights. So, uh,

yeah, so I, I've got a nice little room to work out in now, and I'm psyched for that. We're going to go. I feel like I kind of paused. I didn't gain weight, but I used to lose a pound a week, and that hasn't been happening. So we're getting back on the train. We're going to lose that last third.

I want to lose 30 pounds. I lost about 20, 22, and we're going to lose that last eight, 10 and see where we are. I'm in the same boat. Like I've the last week I've been like really, really good, like about my eating and all my working out and like, cause I'm using my fitness pal again, which is the easiest thing to do if you're trying to track what you're eating and everything and like keeping track of your protein. And you know, that's really all you track of protein. And then just making sure that i'm not eating a bunch of trash do you have to weigh everything uh i like round it kind of like if i go like i went to uh the store yesterday and was like uh oh i'll have you know a pound of filet mignon because

that sounded good and so then i just ate a half pound of it last night and made a half pound of it uh on the stove and then in the oven right before this and you know estimated about so like i don't like i have a food scale but i don't use it for that much um and then like everything else like i'll just measure out with like my quarter cup like measuring utensils and shit like i bought some like raw almonds to eat without any salt on it and i'm throwing those fuckers away because they are bad regular almonds are terrible i had no idea that it was the salt deceiving me the entire time and so i i'm done with those i got myself some spanish red skin peanuts with salt on them to eat instead

almonds are not a poor nut cheese almonds are great if you got salt on there. I liked almonds. I liked them, right? And I would squeeze them in my teeth, and I'd feel the almond juice come out, and I'm like, I'm a fan of almonds. This is really good. Almond oil. Yeah. So then my wife got me salted almonds, and now I'm ruined because regular almonds are shit by comparison like like i'm like

oh man you destroyed me woman like i because it's hard to find the just the right almond sometimes anyway yeah i i think i'm gonna get on board the my fitness pal thing i think counting calories would it's just right i am i'm happy i definitely made an improvement right i'm better than i was at my worst. I'm happy about that. I think this summer, we can go not just from bad to not bad, but to good. Imagine that. Yes. I want to have some stomach definition by the time summer rolls around,

which probably won't happen because I'm still, you know, probably 20 pounds from that even beginning to start. Because I'm like 195 now because I stagnated. And then over the holidays I ate like an animal and gained a couple pounds. And now I'm just getting back on it. But, yeah. I'm glad you said that. I thought I was alone.

I was actually kind of – so we all stood this together, right i my principal objective was to lose weight kai was pretty much happy and your principal you want to you had a two-fold thing you want to lose weight and gain some muscle and you did and i'm like that's that's pretty cool actually like you thank you you got a much better look i uh i want to follow that and you know and like the more muscle you put on, the more you're able to eat what you want because your muscles are working 24-7. So it takes way more calories to keep feeding muscle like that. So it's almost like by working out, you're earning future snacks is what I tell myself sometimes. And of course you're right.

And the other part of it is, and I think everyone's this way, but I know that I am. When I'm working out, when I'm working out when i'm active when i'm exercising the foods that i uh thirst for you know what crave is what i'm looking for are better ones you know if i'm laying around watching netflix what i really want is candy in a bowl of some sort if i'm out in a field being active what i really want is water and almonds. Yeah, like I lean meat before this and like some nuts, and I had a nice healthy lunch, like a giant salad.

And a buddy of mine was texting me right before we started this. And was like, hey, after you finish your podcast tonight, you want to like get a beer and like watch the end of the Blues game? And I'm like, first of all, there's no fucking way I'm going to be done before the Blues game's over. You know how long I'm busy these nights. And two, no, that's all right. Thanks anyway, though. But if I had made a shitty decision earlier today

with pizza and then a burrito with a bunch of cheese on it, I might be in the mind to just be like, eh, this day's chalked up to a loss. I'll go get some pretzel bites and a beer over there and just, you know, drink that sandwich of calories, basically. But because I made good decisions, it's like, oh, I don't, if I do that, then it's like all the previous decisions I made today are nullified. So no, no, I don't want that. It turned my win into a loss. Who wants that?

Exactly. Like, when I finish working out for a day, like, I never feel like, oh, yeah yeah i want to go have a nice burger and a beer for the most part because it's like damn it like learning your work schedule like i tell mine hey if the day starts with tea i have a show that night to me this is an easy schedule to remember but to my friends it is always lost they they my friends just know thursdays i can't do anything like oh that's right yeah because tuesday is pretty much usually because these are time zone and you can go out after yeah i can go out after but i very very rarely go out on tuesdays just because like the weekend was just two days ago and you're kind of still like not in the mood i don't know usually after pkn i'll either just i'll just work out cook dinner uh and then fiddle fuck around on

netflix or my computer and not play video games i need to play video games again that'll take up more time you know and i feel like it's almost oddly healthier than watching tv you know well it depends on what program it depends on what program you watch and what game you're playing, to be fair. I have not won. For example, Kyle's game of watching a big-titted woman run around in high heels with a laser rifle, that's not improving anyone's cognitive

ability. If anything, it's a big issue. There's lots of shooting. And to be fair, I feel like I'm getting really good at the shooting. And PUBG, you get in three, four, maybe ten gunfights every 30 minutes. But in Fallout, there's dozens of enemies everywhere. They're flying like gigantic mosquitoes coming at you.

There's ghouls. There's super mutants. Ghouls. Ghouls. Little green ghouls. They're coming at you, and I'm just twitch locking it on and flip shooting stuff. It's green ghouls. They're coming at you, and I'm just twitch-locking it on and flip-shooting stuff. It's a lot of fun.

So, all right. So there's a poll on the subreddit that Chiz put up. Do you want wings discussion? 247 votes yes. 46 votes no. That's 80. A resounding victory. I did not see that coming.

Well, is this a biased poll? Because the first one was crazy. It's not founding victory. I did not see that coming. Well, is this a biased poll? Because the first one was crazy. It's not that one. It says, do you want a Wings discussion with Boogie? 247, yes. 46, no. 16%, no. So at the very least, I want to read some of the comments on the subreddit from his video.

He made his video response today. I'm just scanning through. How can you possibly think that you were owed a financial buyout from a podcast you haven't been a part of for three-plus years, and the reason you were removed from said podcast was not showing up to your obligations. In parentheses. Sleeping through shows when you work from home. Treating your co-workers poorly.

Canceling a work trip the night before it happens. That's akin to me not showing up to work telling my boss, why the fuck you schedule me for that shit faggot. Getting fired and saying I'm owed back pay for three years I didn't work there anymore. Here's another comment. Hilarious. Hilarious to see Wings just spit in the face of the sweaty idiots typing book reports defending him on here a few days ago. Lol.

When are people going to realize that Wings is a horrible trash human and Kyle dogs on him when he has a temper tantrum at the hosts and the subreddit. What's the highest rated comment though? Like are you not selectively picking them? I'm going by you. Even if you disagree, I love that guy's line of sweaty idiots writing book reports. Top comment.

Let's see. Let's see. Let's see. Oh, it's mine. I asked, so I guess I should just ignore this A question mark, and then there's a ton of, you know, the replies to that. Let me go below that. Five points, three points, four points. One point.

Forty-three points. Kyle's ammo was just about running low. Thanks for topping it right back up again, Wings. Thirty-one points. I'm not pre-reading these. I'm just going by them. This dude sees himself as a victim and will continue to be one until he realizes

that only he can change that. Yeah, Kyle's a fucking dick, but so is Wings. I honestly don't feel bad for him. He's a grown man with thousands of people cheering him on, and he still finds a way to place the blame. I like Wings as a wild card, but that's it. If I was Woody, Kyle, or Taylor talking all this shit,

I would understand more because they each have a very unique twist on the show and I think only that I think only they could achieve. However with Wings I feel like I can go to any dive bar near me pick out the craziest fucker there and get him to say very similar shit

to Wings. Wings isn't unique enough to be a whack packer and he's not even and he's not clever or funny enough to be considered a realer and he's not even and he's not clever or funny enough to be considered a real host this man should be happy with all the promotion we and you know caps give him not the other way around seems like everybody's coming in on in column kyle yeah i i i i would i was saying before i forget when that like the surveys seem to be pro Kyle

but the comments seem to be anti Kyle this is overwhelmingly pro Kyle Wings loves playing the victim or moral faggin Kyle once called him

a cry bully and he was dead right it's so ironic because all he does is boss people around on his streams he plays with or talks to subs

like shit by Wings definition he too is a bully. Hurt people hurt people. Something about that burned into my head. I had never heard it before. Laugh my ass off. I quote, grew this subreddit

by, and then end quote, by bitching out of the survival trip, quote, I'm not asking for money, I am entitled to it, end quote, by bitching out of the survival trip, quote, I'm not asking for money. I am entitled to it, end quote, after asking for them to pay for his surgery. My personal view is Wings deserves anything that happens to him. He has had strike one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, and nine. He has pushed away all help while went behind and trash talked about his only friends. However, the whole kyle keeps talking

about wings is so childish and cringy and just feels like he's beating a dead horse like a dead pig and it is kind of sad with how he thinks uh about wings and rants about him wings is fascinating i i think about him all the time it's hilarious to me that you say that and that you do that like it's a i don't think about wings all the time i mean i think about him sometimes he's he's in the uh boundaries of my life so i but the way you describe it like yeah i wonder what wings doing now he's fascinating only think about that dude when you guys bring him up dude he's fascinating no when kyle brings him up this guy goes wait the story about him getting shot in the leg was just horse shit lol uh and then the op says yep he he's admitted pretty much all his stories were lies didn't you

see the pka where they asked to see the scar and he flat out refused he still says he worked as a 911 operator, though. Yeah, I don't... Also, he lied in the video that he uploaded. This guy points it out. He says, then right after saying that, and by saying that, he means saying that he's only lied like twice. He lied about the age he started doing YouTube. I'm pretty sure he was 25 or 26. He said he was 23 when he told those

stories. It's just crazy. Let's see. Well, an exaggeration are not the same thing to me. Yeah, I don't put that tally. Yeah, I forget how old I am all the time. He permabanned me

for saying, stop talking about this. It doesn't help oh man uh he is cranky that if there's a word that nails wings he's cranky and and it you know so wings is superpower i used to say this all the time, was that people forgave him. They kept going back on his side. Like, he could do anything, and they would still be like, I'm on your team, Wings. But the thing he does now, which is like, oh, you're on my team? And how does that pay my bills?

Give me money, is making no one on his team. That is the worst possible response. If he just said, thanks, man, I'm trying so hard, everyone would be on his side. In case you're wondering, by the way, we're talking about the video he uploaded today, which was called Wings Response to PKA or something like that. You can watch it if you want.

Wings Response to PKA. No, I don't mean we should watch it here, but if you're listening to this and you want to watch it. That's how you find it. Yeah. Well, you guys want to call it a show? Yeah, I could. I guess it's time.

One more. Quote, I've grew the fuck up. Please, you're 32, live with your grandmother, and you literally beg and cry on the internet for people to give you money because your content is fucking horrible. You're rude as fuck to your supporters, and you literally beg and cry on the internet for people to give you money because your content is fucking horrible. You're rude as fuck to your supporters and you refuse to try anything else. You still throw controllers, brick equipment, and treat your online teammates like complete shit all over video games.

And you still lie like a madman. One night he was talking endlessly about how he streams 40 to 60 hours every week for the last four months, which is why, quote, I deserve to not have to worry about money, end quote. Yes, who cares if the content is actually good or not, if your personality isn't complete garbage? Just stream for four hours and you're owed the world, right? Anyways, I went to his Twitch.tv page today and calculated the time of his last seven days from that day

it barely hits 34 hours. So grow up. Streaming on Twitch is my livelihood and the way this guy behaves on Twitch makes me embarrassed to claim that as my job. Who's this guy? Give him a shout out. What's an eternal enigma? What's your Twitch profile dude? You deserve some more viewers for that. Fine.

I wonder if he has his branding sorted out. Eternal enigma. Let's see if Eternal Enigma has a PKA fan, a subredditor, and a Twitch streamer, it seems. Alright, so it's

N Eternal Enigma, which Kyle said right, but I somehow heard wrong. And that's his Twitch name, too. Yeah, check him out. Check out N Eternal Enigma. Check out Movement Watches. Check out Dollar Shave Club. Check out Boogie.

Because Boogie has lost like 150 pounds. He's got a great positive outlook on some crazy changes in his life. And he's very entertaining and fun to talk with. I enjoyed having Boogie on. Thank you, Boogie, for coming on the show. That's all I got. Eternal Enigma is from his PO box.

This is not a secret, I guess. He's in Lazella, Georgia. Where's that? Can I go hang out with this dude? He should come over here. We'll fucking... We'll get Chinese delivered. We'll tag team. Let's see. You're about

an hour away. I was like, Lizelle, Georgia? Fuck. Livonia also starts with an L. They must be. They probably border each other. I'm nowhere near Livonia also starts with an L they must be they probably border each other I'm nowhere near Livonia

so anyway I might even got that name wrong but yeah so did I you know me and names Painkiller already episode 371 check out our sponsors and have a good night