Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #392

Episode Date: June 29, 2018

On this week's PKA, HARLEY MORENSTEIN is back... from Epic Meal Time and the guys talk about the history of EMT and what happened with Muscles Glasses, the guys tear into Wings and his conflicting stories about the weightloss surgery over the last DECADE and they examine the recent death of XXXTentacion, because PKA "loves" rap and rap culture.

and we're live painkiller already episode 391 with our guest harley kyle a couple sponsors tonight get quip casper mattresses smart mouth and four hymns we'll get to those people later on in the show of course there's links in the description if you're curious and just can't wait but yeah we got harley uh harley on with us big time business man on the shelves of walmart super stores across the i'm so excited about this. We've got a ton of great topics. But Harley, dude, you're like a, I don't know, empire?

A retail king. A retail king? You're going to be one of those like judges on Shark Tank soon. You know, everything has always been an accident. I have no idea what's going on. It's kind of like I just like

I like ran into the ocean with like a surfboard and fell and landed surfing it and i've just been riding this wave i'm like i hope it continues i don't know what i'm doing like i went to vegas where we have our jerky plant first of all by the way guys thank you so much for having me i love being on the show i and i was just gonna tell you before every single month i swear to god like if i'm out somewhere whatever it's once a month without fail i see a dude they'll be like yo sauce boss can i get a picture and i'm like yeah dog and i swear once a month when are you going on pka next i swear i it's once a month consistently the most like it's that even beats people being like yo are they gonna do another vghs you know no not counting bacon stuff that's that that'll happen but i just mean like

are you on pk next is like right after epic meal time shit people want to know when i'm back thank you so you better be watching um i uh we uh we we we i have a jerky company now. I don't know how that happened. I sent you guys the jerky. It's called Pizza in a Bag Pizza Flavored Jerky. And we made a company called Super Snack Time. You know why it's called Super Snack Time and not Epic Meal Time? Because a giant food corporation trademarked Epic Meal Time in the food space in 2012.

What? 2012? That's after you made it a thing. Yeah, but not in the food space in 2012 what 2012 that's after you made it a thing yeah but not in the food space so they locked that down so really like okay like that's it like that's america to me and i fucking love that like i learned my lesson in usa and i'm like that's the way it's got to be you got to be fast next time because it's a game out here and if you want to make that money got to play that game and like now i can't even use epic meal time so i gotta be like super snack time an epic meal time product it has like a little epic meal time on the back of the box but regardless i uh that almost worked out a little bit better because if it was branded epic

meal time then people might assume that oh this is one of those crazy could be kind of gross like a challenge kind of thing yeah they're like oh it's super snack time by epic meal time oh this is a snack it's gonna taste normal it's gonna be good but it's by those guys whose videos i enjoy so i think yeah exactly exactly if it said epic meal time people were like oh i'm gonna open this bag and it's gonna get drunk and start yelling at me it's gonna cause my weight to fluctuate rapidly yeah i've had a lot of uh i've had a lot of fans message me and the people my and uh my gaming discord and stuff and they're like yeah i gotta find this stuff at walmart i want to support harley and uh they're like is it good is it good and uh harley sent us all these enormous boxes of it i don't when you buy it at walmart it doesn't come in an enormous box like that no but now you can you can get it from super snack time.com okay now you can order it

online if you don't have a walmart near you but who doesn't have a walmart near them it comes in like imagine like some sort of a party pizza like a like a like a 36 inch pizza it comes in a box like that you open it up and there and there's all these pizza slices these pizza shaped jerky bags and i was like there's no way it actually tastes like pizza. This is going to be like those pizza-flavored potato chips or something like that. Like Pringles, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Those are gross as fuck.

But I open this bag, and I smell, and it's like, this is Supreme Pizza. This is exactly – I think I smell onions and olives, and I eat it. There's literally olive pieces on it, on the Supreme. It's flavored with real deal pieces, so there's actual olives on there. Yeah, it tastes just like pizza. It's really good. The buffalo kind is the best, I think. It's spicy.

I liked them. That was my favorite, too. That's how spicy that one was. That's why I liked it. Harley. That one got me good. How did you create this business? How did this become a thing?

Did someone approach you? Did you start it? Yeah, so I got approached by a group of people, essentially, that wanted to get into the space. They wanted to work with, essentially, influencers. And we weren't interested in licensing our brand to something. We've done it before. And it's just not worth it. It's not what we want to something. Uh, we've done it before and it's just, it's just like not worth it. It's not, it's not what we want to do. And, um, I guess we'd like to, we'd like to own what we do. And so we committed to doing this, this product pizza in a bag and it's in a triangle

shaped bag, which I actually like, which is the coolest part. That, that is, that's actually our, that's our patent and that's pending. So suck it. Whoever that company was, the giant company that I don't want to mention, those Sumit Smithereens. And that, that was exciting. The triangle bag, but like the concept pizza in a bag was cool in itself. You know, I liked, I liked the triangle. I like the concept pizza in a bag sounds like if i saw pizza in a bag i'd look at them but what the hell is this shit so you know and all i would i would

be curious and that's that's what we wanted to do we wanted to make it we wanted to make it something that people would want to like i don't know they'd be like epic mealtime they'd be like yo this is so epic mealtime um like so it seemed like you guys exploded into it right away because it was like one day you'd walk through the aisle at walmart nothing and then the next day you guys have like eight skews up there on the top row of at least at the walmart i saw you guys at was it all just released all at once like that like all right this top corner in the snack aisle all you guys starting you know whatever i think the best thing that happened was i uh i went to pitch it at walmart and the guys that i that make the jerky themselves they came in with me and i sat down at walmart and and went to pitch it and the guy was like he came in the guy who's the jerky buyer and he was like oh I know you

nice hell yeah he's like I know oh yeah cool that's that's a plus and he's like so it's jerky and we were like yeah and he was like you know I'm a big fan of jerky he's like my favorite jerky is this company's bacon jerky. And he referenced a company that makes bacon jerky. And he was just telling me because he knows Epic Mealtime. And the guy who I'm with who makes bacon was like, oh, hi, I'm that guy. And that's my bacon jerky. And he was like, you make that jerky?

And he was like, and you make this jerky? You'll do the marketing for it? He's like, cool. And apparently there's like a major jerky company that's at Walmart. Like it's like pretty much the biggest jerky company in the country. And they have so many SKUs at Walmart. And like when Walmart picked it up, they like walked in with the triangle-shaped bag into Walmart HQs

and like slammed it on the desk. And they were like, what the hell is this? It's like I guess no one goes to the jerky space and like rattles the cages But we came in and we're like we're stupid internet guys We got a triangle shaped bag piece of the bag suck our dick eat our shit chump chump And it was like oh, yo, what's going on out here? You know so I felt like we were It felt like epic mealtime days where there's

like a standard and there's a way things have been going for a long time and i came in and i was like you know what i'm an idiot and this is what an idiot would do pizza in a bag and i don't regret it and i i like it listen it's low carb it's low carb it's like if you're doing keto diet you can't eat pizza but we got you i want to to circle back. So these guys approach you. They want to license your brand. And you're like, ah, no. I want a deeper stake in this thing. So now you're part ownership of this business?

Yes. So I own Super Snack Time. I own Pizza in a Bag. What's really crazy is Walmart, they go and they buy like – crazy as walmart like you know they go and they buy like uh like they're like oh we're gonna do a sample of you know this many pizza in the bags of this flavor supreme and this many of buffalo and this many of uh of this uh and uh well so we'll try these three flavors and we're just gonna do a small sample sale so i'm like cool and the guy's like regional and they're like non-nationwide and he's like cool so we walk out and i'm like hey that's pretty neat and he's like keep walking

we keep walking he's like do you know what this means it's like what he's like there's 4 500 walmart's they took x amount y amount z amount of those three flavors do you know what this means i was like no he's like we have to make 2.8 million bags of this fucking pizza jerky right now, like three months ago. And I was like, what are you talking about? He's like, we're behind schedule. We got to make a lot of jerky. I'm like, can you do this? He's like, I don't know.

And I was like, okay. Literally. And then like a month later, I'm in Las Vegas where the jerky plant is and we're like filming an episode there. And I'm like walking and like, like she's my buddy Amir, you know, crazy. Amir has been on Epic Meal Time for the longest time. One of the craziest guys I know. episode there and i'm like walking and like like she's my buddy amir you know crazy amir he's been on epic meal time for the longest time one of the craziest guys i know i'm like looking around i was like yo there's 2.8 million bags of pizza jerky with amir's picture on the back what the fuck is this world what is going on and i'm like look i'm like yo i'm like who put all this shit together

all i did was like i love it i the idea. We're fully behind it, but the people we work with, they know what they're doing. I guess I'm happy we made a brand that someone wanted to partner up with, and the fact that we got in Walmart is cool. Did you have a big investment to own this thing? Did they ask for your money up front? No.

Zero investment. We're basically like sweat equity in marketing. We put our name behind it. We're, we're, uh, basically like sweat equity in marketing. We put our name behind it. We used Epic Meal Time to, to push it. And it just, uh, I just happy because it tastes like pizza. You know, the fact that Walmart picked it up, I had gone to seven 11, uh, to pitch it and stuff like that. But you joked about shark tank earlier. And one thing is if you go on that show and you're like, need x amount of dollars uh yeah and they're like okay well what are your sales so far whatever be like not that crazy but we just got picked up uh in

every walmart walmart nationwide that's when every shark is like i'm in i'm in like they love walmart on that show that show is just like what does walmart want what's that what's next like if you go to walmart and walmart decides they want everything even if you like two days earlier were at target and they're like no hell no and then they find out you went to walmart like uh you come back we definitely want that we need yeah yeah you please please how are sales so far uh it's like apparently it's interesting like i look at the things and it's like you know there has to be this many sales for it to be good. This many means it's bad and this many means it's very good.

So I was looking through the sales and stuff and it's like all standard sales, regular stuff. And I'm like, okay. But what's interesting is like it's now like the best individual piece of merchandise we've made. the best individual piece of merchandise we've made i think it even super like uh it it surpassed the bacon strips t-shirt which was initially our best merchandise piece and it did that like you know since it came out like two or three months like walmart guys walmart is no fucking joke like that is insane like everyone like there's just there's too many walmart's out there like no one needed that much walmart when i hear that you're in walmart i had that gigantic box in this room for an embarrassing long period of time and every time i saw it i'm like harley just made a new quantum

leap in wealth right like this thing could go well for 2018 and he'll never worry about money again it's not in that realm yet it's not in that realm yet because like like once again walmart is like like you take a very small piece they they put their prices extremely low you know that's how it's got to be so you make the money on the fact that like you're like i'm cool making a penny on each one because there's 2.8 million of them you know but it's like it is literally a matter of pennies uh but it's like if they re-up if they hit us up and they're like we're ready for the next round that's when like maybe i'll be like uh i'll go buy a watch or some more like star wars dolls have you had to go to any like follow-up buyer meetings to talk about your like

the iri and nielsen data for the sales, or are you still in that first kind of... What we just did is we now have pizza in a bag in a four-and-a-half ounce bag, so the ones we sent you were two-ounce bags. The four-and-a-half ounce bag will have the zip at the top, because four-and-a-half ounce, you probably won't eat

the whole thing in one sitting. If it's the Buffalo one, I will. Yeah, the Buffalo one. I'm. If it's the Buffalo one, I will. Yeah, the Buffalo one. I'm glad you guys like the Buffalo one. That one kicked my ass. I like the Supreme. The Buffalo did me dirty.

I was like, wasn't this so hot when we taste tested this bad boy? But yeah, the Supreme was my favorite. Which one? The Supreme, for sure. Yeah, me too. That's what kind of pizza I like. It's just so accurate. It tastes exactly like Supreme. which one the supreme for sure that's what kind of pizza i like it's just so accurate it tastes

exactly like supreme um but the uh yeah we we we went back there we did like uh you know other in a bags which if you really just kind of think about it a little bit you can imagine what they are um but like we pitched them two other in a bag jerkies uh we we pitched them a bacon in a bottle uh is that like a soda or what? I'm not telling anyone anything. I can't. It's just a greasy bacon slurry. It's just coagulated fat.

It doesn't come out. It's just a weed bacon that you... It's like gogurt, but it's bacon. That's a good idea. like gogurt it's like gogurt but it's baby that's a good idea man i'm happy for you i'm excited for you i hope that this is like yeah you know what's crazy about walmart is is they don't give you like an official purchase order so you don't have like documentation so when you start making like you know a million bags of jerky they could hit you up in the middle and be like yeah we're off it. No.

And you're like, oh, okay. Okay, sounds good. Well, I now have 600,000 bags of jerky and Walmart doesn't want it anymore and no one else can buy this amount of jerky in one shot. I guess I've got enough to buy for Amazon for 10 years. I could be out of date, but we learned in school that Walmart doesn't own the products on its shelf, right?

Like they're still yours. They don't buy it until it sells. Is that right? Yeah, exactly. Walmart, what they do is – I'm not exactly sure the whole way it works, but I do know that they like – if they like a product enough, then they just kind of low-key come in and buy the company as it is. And they'll even sell products to other stores, I believe. You could have a product that's the umbrella corporation is Walmart, and it's in a Target, essentially. But what's so crazy is if Walmart goes in and they're the number one, full purchasing power, we want to fire all guns on purchase on this.

Maximum Walmart power, final form, ignited. It's like essentially they will buy 32 million units of something. Whereas the next company in line, number two, not counting digital, is Target. And if Target's like maximum target power it's uh 900 000 wow so like you see like you're dealing with like super saiyan 3 goku and like piccolo here like they're both heavy hitters but like we're talking about 900 000 verse 32 mil this is a big deal is a big difference that's the way walmart is like when walmart says—if you go to a buyer meeting and Walmart says they want something, you do it. Like, other companies, if they're one of, like, the big five, so, like, Walmart, Target, CBS, Walgreens, Rite Aid are kind of the largest retailers in the U.S.

If one of them do it, you know, aside from Walmart, you take it really seriously. But Walmart could, like, tell Harley, like, hey, we want you to get into scented tampons. And Harley would have to be like, of course. I'm like, I'm smelling them right now. Absolutely. What's it going to smell like? Oh, no. You're not bringing this up to me.

I've got 10 ideas. Yes, sir. Yes, ma'am. Absolutely. They're all bacon. Yeah, bacon in your bum. Bacon in your bum. Super snack time tampons.

Bacon in your bum. Yeah. I love Walmart. I like it. They know exactly what they're doing, and they do their business so well. Dude, it's so cool there. It was in Bentonville, Arkansas. And what was really low-key cool was that I was in Arkansas.

And Boogie, you guys know Boogie? Yeah. Do you guys see him? No, we like Boogie. He comes on our show. How could you? You never know, though. I love Boogie. He comes on our show. How could you? You never know, though. I love Boogie.

So I was like, yo, I was like, Boogie, like he hit me up on Twitter. He's like, oh, you're in Arkansas. What are you doing? I was like, yo, this is so sick. Like I love Boogie for years. This guy's in Arkansas. This guy like at the time was physically incapable of even leaving Arkansas. I'm like, I'm going to go see him like live in Arkansas.

And literally that's, that's all there was in Bentonville was Walmart and boogie. Everyone there works for Walmart except boogie. Everything is Walmart. They were, everyone is, the whole city is Walmart. And I got to have a sushi with him him which was interesting sushi in Arkansas but regardless and when I was there at the pitch meetings it was just cool like just Walmart was like

it was just really interesting it was very interesting and apparently like the owner creator of Walmart like Bobby T Walmart I don't know I made that up he he was like seriously the type of guy that in the parking lot if he walked by a nickel he would pick up and off the floor like even though and if you were like an exec at the time

and you bought like a fancy car and rolled up to walmart in like your lambo he'd be like don't bring that shit in this parking lot like walmart was at the time like for the people like for the people that were frugal and it wasn't about big bucks it wasn't about making money and like apparently they just give you like you know it's kind of like you walk in and they're like this is the guy and this is how he was you know and there's statues of him and stuff it's cool statue of like uh you know optics like for buyer meetings what they used to do that same guy like some retailers like you have to get dressed up really really nice and you show up in your suit and you look spiffy he used to be like

like if some slick guy pulled up in a jag and was wearing you know really nice clothes he'd be like this guy does not understand our consumer he doesn't understand our business he's not going to be presenting this in a way that's conducive to coaxing more walmart consumers to the store who do you think you're selling to? So it was almost like a test. You're right. His statue in the Walmart lobby, he's wearing a blazer and a baseball cap. His bronze statue has a trucker hat on.

And you're just like, fuck, that's good. By the way, I really, really, really like, I don't know if you guys have ever been, I really liked Arkansas. It was like I got off the plane, and it smelled so good. Like it just smelled like grass and like mud. You know what I mean? It smelled like a real deal. I was just there.

The great outdoors. I love it there. It's great. Yeah, I liked it there too. I like the people. And then we went to Arkansas. We also went to Oklahoma. There's actual cowboys in Oklahoma, like for real,

wearing cowboy boots and cowboy hats going to small town diners and they're not cosplaying like that's just how they are I was like holy smoke yeah or like they're not like at the gay bar if you're in LA where it's like there's cowboys here yeah

those don't seem like very effective chaps I'm glad to judge Those don't seem like very effective chaps. Mine to judge. I'm glad to hear that's going so well at Walmart. That's awesome. Yeah, listen. I mean, like, it's like Walmart obviously has the potential to be that quantum leap. I'm not there yet.

I'm still at a stage, you know, but cross your fingers for me. I hope Americans do what I always wanted them and expected them to do and that was to go to a walmart and buy a product called pizza in a bag and i feel like i feel like they would do that i feel like you know like i don't know and you probably aren't barely spending anything on advertising are you doing any traditional advertising or all yeah actually there was a whole twitch event thing called beyond the summit i think it was like uh it was a dota or league event going on and uh we threw a couple bucks at it to have them put up the website with like a an order code and stuff like that and things so like we had done it i actually one of the sickest interactions i had was funny i was hitting up influencers like hey what's your address i want to send you something for free and i sent one to uh bad baby danielle bergoli cash me outside oh i was like

hey uh i want you to uh i want your address which is weird like sliding into a 14 year old girl's dms like what's your address i'm gonna send you but so i i i sent the thing and i was like oh i have something to send she wrote back actually was like what is it and i was like, oh, I have something to send. She wrote back. She was like, what is it? And I was like, it's food. It's like a snack. And then she wrote back, well, I don't accept food. And I was like, okay, cool. But if you're ever in Walmart and you see pizza in a bag, that's mine. So if you try it out, let me know what you think.

And the funniest thing was I got this response back where she was like, you know, I got a music video coming out and i eat a snack in the middle of it maybe pizza in a bag could be that snack and i was just like damn i know exactly where this goes next and i can't believe it's like i don't know it's like a she's a 14 year old girl at the end of the day so like i'm like i know a 14 year old entrepreneur right so i'm like hey that sounds good and she goes 25k and we could do it right now, have it done. And it's like, the video's filming in four days. Let's make it happen.

And I was just like, I want it to be in that video, but it's not going to be that. That's way too much. You have so many commercials per product at walmart you need to sell like 250 000 of them to two and a half million on my math is off she's gonna have to change the name of that song super snack time because of that yadi just doing a little yadi and i was like if if so i i bounced back with something that i kind of felt like they wouldn't do. I was like, if you and Lil Yachty wear Super Snack Time jackets the whole video, then I'm in. And then she wrote back,

that ain't never going to happen. I'm cracking up. She's actually funny. I'm cracking up at it. So I write back, alright, let's be real. What does 5K get me? And Troy's back, a pat on the back. I was like, listen, I was already a fan of that little girl i was already a fan of her because i saw that her second appearance on dr phil i don't know if you saw the first one she was like yeah catch me outside fuck all you hoes whatever but her second appearance dr phil took

the audience away so that she wouldn't get distracted and she came out she's like where's all the hoes and he was like i wanted you to be focused and she goes you ain't got no show if you ain't got no hoes and i'm like damn like she's like dropping like rhymes like like like this was like a written joke and like friday after next you know in like 1999 she's doing it on the fly to doctor like an earpiece in for someone who's old enough to have cultural references you know like i'm thinking like you know she's just doing this herself. And I used to wonder if she was a coach, but then I saw something, which I'll tell you right after.

But she was like, oh, I want to use my power to stop bullies. I get bullied. I know what it's like. And I was like, oh, it's like she's got a heart. She's 14 years old. Let's not give her a hard time. And then the mom came out, and you're like, oh, this is the trouble. This is where the trouble comes from.

It's mommy who's doing the problems here, and I see that. And so I was like a fan of her this is the trouble. This is where the trouble comes from. It's mommy who's doing the problems here. And I see that. And so I was like a fan of her, not the mom. And if you look at like a 13-year-old or a 14-year-old or like a little T or whatever, and you're like, I hate that little idiot. It's like, whoa, slow down. That's ours. Like we made that as society. We created this world where that's the person that comes.

That's a kid. Like how could you hate a kid? They're probably doing what someone tells them you know yeah that person was born in 2006 yeah exactly and when bad baby does something bad like or whatever her thing you're just like you know it could be a circumstance of her environment you know who knows but what i really she earned my respect was like when tmz rolled up to her at the plane on the airport once and they were like kim k wants to work with you and she said something along the lines of like nah fuck her she has sex on tape that's the only reason why she's popular i don't want to work with her and i was like yo i know so many people that could be like yo screw kim k but if kim k wants to work with you you're like how am i going to make this work because i

want that exposure you know you know what i how am I going to make this work? Because I want that exposure, you know? You know what I mean? People, they would trade in their whatever they stand for. I'm intensely curious how she's going to turn out, though, right? Because she's 14 years old. Let's assume she does land some of these 25K deals every once in a blue moon, right? And now she's pulling in. She gets apparently 40K in appearance. But she won't always, right?

In 2020, she'll be nobody, I think. Maybe 2019. Maybe she's that now. I don't know. That's the thing. She's got to strike while the iron's hot. Right. I'm not knocking her for striking while the iron's hot.

But what I'm saying is when you have that level of success at 14 years old, at 18, I doubt she's like, I want to go to college and be a mechanical engineer. I don't see that in her future. Unless she makes a quantum leap into another level of wealth, she's ruined. It's tough to say

because I know exactly what you're saying. And whereas I might look like at a little tay and consider such a thing like bad baby is like she's putting on music and like she's connecting with and networking with people like i'm impressed like you got to be impressed it's gone on this long you know listen this is coming from the guy who stretched the fucking bacon joke for like eight years now you know what i mean like to a lot people, like Epic Mealtime doesn't exist. You know, I look at like, I look at like some like of the hot new relevant YouTubers and

I know they look at like my channel and that, that channel scares them. They see a channel that used to have like 7 million subscribers and it got like 2 million views within four days, you know? And like now what it is you know which is where i'm like yes 250 000 views like i know huge creators today look at that and they're like oh i would kill myself like i saw keemstar not literally don't kill yourself i saw keemstar say uh like he he didn't he got like 900 he's like i, I got 980,000 views on that video. I thought my career was done. I was like, damn. I was like, if I get 980,000 views, I'm like, woo, big month, baby, get it. And, and it's funny. Cause like, I, I saw another YouTuber once

he was like, Oh, he was like, I was watching this video and he was like, Oh, my worst fear would be like being epic mealtime, you know, like having this thing and where it's big and it's crazy and it's hot. And then like it, it disappears. And all I was thinking at that time was I was like, you don't ever, you'll never be epic mealtime, buddy. Like, don't worry about that. You'll never have to worry about being epic mealtime because there's like so much more going on and infrastructure happening beyond just me being like, oh, I'm in the kitchen with the camera, boy. Get at me. Like I feel like Bad Baby has more infrastructure going on behind the scenes, more competent adults than what we're let on.

Whereas like someone like a Lil Tay, I've yet to see – I see that more along with what you're saying where I'm like, what's Lil Tay going to be like? Who is Lil Tay? Exactly. That's an excellent, and I envy your life. I don't know who that is either. Is it a rapper? You know what Lil Tay is? And I just keep saying Lil Tay? We hang out on different websites, guys.

Lil Tay. She looks like she's a young Asian girl. She's like a little nine-year-old girl, and she's like, I'm making money. I go to Harvard. I bought this car. I assumed it was a guy all this time. Oh, well, everything I was saying probably made zero sense.

No, no. I mean, dude, you could insert any generic like young YouTuber. She's younger than I pictured, though. Yeah. But she's just like, you know, she's a very coached thing. There's like not really much of a brain to herself yet because she's so young. But that's someone where I'm like, when she's 18, she's going to be like,

I wish you guys didn't film me all the time saying this dumb shit. Like Rebecca Black. Rebecca Black had that It's Friday thing. I got her name right, I think. And she at least was surrounded by enough competent adults that she's like, this paid for my college. And she's going to go on, I assume, to live a competent adults that she's like, this paid for my college, right?

And she's going to go on, I assume, to live a fairly normal life and be like, yeah, I was that girl. It was a neat thing. I enjoyed it. But some of these other people, they just get ruined by their young success. And I think part of the reason that you did well is that you didn't hit it big at 14. You know, you hit it big at 14. You were a substitute teacher. You were a grown-up.

I would have ruined this all, Woody, if it big at 14 you were a substitute teacher you were a grown-up this all woody if i if this happened at 14 do you know how i got it at 25 epic mealtime started if it happened a year earlier i would have fucked it up i would have said something i thought i would have been like this is so smart and avant-garde and like you know you know and i would tweet it and i'd look back down i'd be like that was straight up homophobic and racist and stupid but like at the time i'd be like yo man i'm getting i'm extreme joking bro like i don't know what i don't know what would have happened i would have had a fucking prank channel also i'd be like i'm watching the prank channel you know like it would have been like it would have been completely different i'm happy it happened at the age that it happened at

because i was i would have fucked and i agree with you i totally agree with you that like there's like an age amount where some people can manage it and other people can yeah you saved me she's like saved you and cisco um i had a lot of stock options there when i got hired and then cisco the stock went up and i was never a millionaire or anything i was what i used to call a multi-hundred thousandaire. And then Cisco stock crashed and suddenly I wasn't. And I felt like that experience was really good for me when I went through the whole YouTube Minecraft experience because it wasn't my first time on any kind of wealth roller coaster. But yeah. I guess that life lesson was something you were able to bring with you into this world.

My best life lesson was I was a teacher for three years. Like if I hadn't, you know, worked my ass off Monday to Friday, you know, from like 8 a.m. till 4.30 p.m. to collect literally to net $27,000 Canadian. Literally, you net like $27,000 Canadian. Literally, you net like 22,000 US. That's what my annual salary. I did that for three years. So that always kept me grounded. That always kept me like, I actually do genuinely,

because they're good guys at heart, I genuinely feel bad for some of the younger guys that were on EMT and were like fuck this i'm leaving i want to have i want to have i want to have like fucking mad cars and a boat like kyle you know like i'm doing my own thing like it's literally quoted actually brought the guys down to my house i could tell that there were some what the fuck's going on here they were like yo he's got two cars man and a boat and i'm like i know they're like what the hell is going on man we got were like, yo, he's got two cars, man, and a boat. And I'm like, I know. And they're like, what the hell is going on, man? We got the same views.

And I was like, bro, I have to pay for all you fuckers. I'm like, you're my boat and you're my car. Yeah. But at the time, like, the value of doing a job you like and getting a salary doing a job you like and getting a salary, doing a job you like is so valuable in itself. And I knew that cause I worked for three years at a hard ass job, like a normie job, you know?

Like, so I got that. I was like, yo dude, you get a salary to like eat bacon and get your dick sucked. Like how dare you worry about Kyle's boat, man? Yeah. There's no Russian. Wait, I was on a video. No one sucked my dick at all. I just had to eat cold food.

Do people know that food is cold by the time they serve it? You film a collab with Kyle? What'd you say? That always happens when you film a collab with Kyle. Oh, fuck. I just got tased. You said, I just got tased? Yeah, fuck. I just got tased. You said I just got tased? Yeah, yeah.

We played around with the taser again. I got tased more than you. You ended up making the right decision with no boat, though, and Kyle will attest to that. Oh, yeah, the boat was just a real money pit. I remember you saying, like, I'm trying to get rid of that boat now. And I was like, damn, I want the boat because it's YouTube money, and I love that name. Yeah, the SS YouTube money.

When you head on down to Jacksonville, it's floating somewhere right now. Somebody else bought that bitch about a year ago, and I was so happy. You didn't lose as much as I thought. I had that boat sitting there for like three, four years or something like that. You had the truck. You pulled the blanket off your brand new Camaro, I believe. Kyle,

tell me how close I am with these numbers. You bought the boat for $38,000. You sold it for $24,000 and there were slip fees for four years. What are slip fees? That's like a parking lot for a boat. To park it somewhere? That's actually so funny. You're like, yo, lot for a boat To like park it somewhere That's actually so funny You're like yo I bought a boat

And then you're like oh I gotta put this somewhere Yeah I live in central Georgia The only time I ever The only time I sailed it was from sailing it from where I bought it Like the boat lot To the place I kept it Like we sailed it to there

It was like a five and a half hour voyage Right lots of fun Sounds like a great was like a five and a half hour voyage. Lots of fun. Sounds like a great time though. Five and a half hours, but I think it was about a $20,000 ride. Does that sound right? Probably something like that. You could have bought Bitcoin.

Here's the problem. I blame White Boy for this eternally. This is all White Boy's fault because the reason I made this terrible financial decision was because i was put i felt i said to white boy hey florida real estate is is just bottomed the fuck out it was right in the middle of the financial crisis it was so goddamn cheap we could get there was a lake there was a a beach house it was one block from the beach. And I want to say it was a hundred grand or I think it was a hundred grand. And so we'd each put in 50 grand. We'd own this fucking house.

And by the way, that house today is worth like $350,000. That's the house that I was out of yours? No, no, no. This is like a beach house in Florida that we were intending on buying. And I'm like, this is dual purpose, white boy. We'll both own it. We can go down separately. We can go down together. This is like a two bedroom, nice house, right by the ocean. And also, we can claim it as a part-time

residence and we don't have to pay any state income tax on the portion of time that we supposedly live there. So we could say like eight months of the year we live there. So you're going to get rid of two thirds of your state income tax in perpetuity. And he's like, sold. Let's do it. So like, I've got everything booked, ready to go. The night before he's supposed to fly down. He's like, nah, I changed my mind. I changed my mind. I think that Kelly may have influenced him, his girlfriend,-time girlfriend if wings had pulled that shit you would have gone ballistic well do you still talk to white

boy by the way uh every now and then uh i i talked to him maybe a few months ago just just chatted with him a little bit i i saw like something came up and i saw him and i was just like oh yeah man this guy got so fucked every time i saw him like yes he was like like actually like i'd never saw he's like in a ghillie suit like i forgot about the ghillie suit he was so wasted but yeah he canceled last minute and i was like well what the fuck am i gonna do we've already planned this trip we got hotels booked and my friend was like well you know in florida you can claim a boat as red as a residence as long as it's got like a bathroom and a kitchen etc etc and i was like well that sounds like a good idea and all the while i was sort of like tunnel visioned on this

idea of getting out of like a lot of state income tax and uh and claiming the boat as a residence and everything and it would would have been you know it was all on the up and up it wasn't like some insurance some like fraudulent thing where they were proposing it was it was you know it was legit and i got tunnel vision on that and just never really got out of that tunnel vision and started thinking broad more broadly and it was i don't remember what i paid for the boat i think i paid what he said 38 but i think it may have been for the boat i think i paid what he said 38 but i think it may have been more like 28 i think i spent 28 on it and like change you know like i bought like a a radar for it or a sonar or some shit whatever some sort of like boat now you did

like a big dick move and like got like a sick plane on the way down to go pick it up no no no we drove drove down there and uh and uh but yeah i think i ended up i lost money for sure i lost like 10 15 000 on it or something like that but in the grand scale things that's not a gigantic loss it's an expensive one ride on a boat oh yeah for yeah definitely so like if you're gonna spend have you ever broken it down like by the second you're like man i was spending four dollars a second no i've never i refuse to break it down all i know is it's sold it's gone i got my nice lump sum of cash whatever it was like like 20 grand or 19 grand or whatever it ended up being and i was happy when i got i was like good it's all over i have the thing done gone because like every year i was getting like letters

from like the coast guard that I needed to re-up some sort of boat registration. And I was like, fuck you. Come get me. Come get me, Coast Guard. You people don't have cars. I'm just staying away from the ocean. You'll never catch me. I'm on land. Let's take your jurisdiction, boy.

They have helicopters, Kyle. They're coming. They would have to... Those are marine choppers. They don't have the range. They don't have wheels. They just float. They do have wheels. Did you savepers they don't have the range they don't have wheels they just float they do it did you save any money at all from the tax yeah yeah like but i mean it it was of course out what the savings were outweighed by the cost of the boat of course but the the idea was sound in principle it was just that like like i said i got tunnel vision on this whole thing and i don't know that it would have worked kyle like i don't know that you can say florida is my It was just that, like I said, I got tunnel vision on this whole thing.

I don't know that it would have worked, Kyle. I don't know that you can say Florida is my residence for taxes, but Georgia is my residence for all these firearms and explosive licenses that you have to have. It's a part-time residence. Like I said, I would claim that I'm there X amount of months per year. And if I say I'm there eight months out of the year, you know, 12 months in a year, then two-thirds of my state income tax would disappear. Yeah, two-thirds of my yearly state income tax.

But it would have been fine if I bought the house because in conjunction with the tax savings, I'd of course had an appreciating asset rather than a depreciating asset that needs to be cleaned like every eight months or it really starts depreciating you've got to get that thing hauled out of the water and get the barnacles and bullshit

scraped off of it by professionals who do that. You've got to have a barnacle man, right? We all have barnacle guys. I kept it at a nice place. The slip fees were ridiculous. I don't remember what they were, and I don't even want to try to think about what they were.

But the place I had it kept at had perks. They were like, this is the pool, and this is the hot tub, and up here is the lounge, and you have access to all of the facilities here. We have a cookout here every Saturday night and I'm just like, can I just stop you right there? You won't see me for a year or two now.

You'll probably never see me again. We'll exchange emails if something happens. Just so you understand, I may have a sailboat, but I don't know how to sail. I don't want to see this fucking thing. And the thing was, my sailboat like my thirty thousand dollar sailboat or whatever racing yacht by the way if see if i were some

people that's what i'd refer to it as because that's what it says on the title that's what it is yeah exactly it's let's just call you know what it was like a hunter 34 like do you know what it was if i heard the name again i would know but but no not off the top of my head it was it was a very fast racing yacht like like i don't and and honestly i don't even remember how many knots we were pulling but i'll tell you this if you told me i wouldn't know how fast it right like like like i have the idea of like 19 knots or something in my head under wind but that could be totally wrong uh the coolest thing was we were sailing up the saint john's river to like get it to where it was going

it was just me and my friend he had sailing experience so he's operating the sails and i'm steering the thing and uh and so we've got to go under this bridge this this uh and there's only one place you can go under the bridge it's right down the middle so there's enough room for the masks and everything and coming up from behind us is a legit racing yacht crewed by three men there are three men operating the sails on this thing and they sort of like honk

their horn like they want to pass and go ahead of us and I'm like should we let them go and he's like fuck them and he starts like tightening the sails up extra tight. We've got the boat laid over all the way to the left and or the right, depending on... You drive a sailboat in zigzags. The edges of the boat are skimming the water.

There's water coming into the boat. We've got it laid over so fast. We outran the quarter million dollar racing yacht. It was wonderful it was it was exciting like for 30 minutes we're racing them and and and we beat them to the bridge and everything and that's by the way that 30 minutes of excitement in the sailboat is exactly what everyone got whoever got sea of thieves yes you beat the game yeah sixty dollars though you. You got Sea of Thieves, super DLC version. Yeah.

Super DLC. Sorry, you're saying you passed this quarter million dollar boat. We outran them and beat them to the bridge, and that made the whole day. It almost made the $10,000 mistake worth it, or whatever mistake I made. And also, I fucked a girl on it

one time that i was just waiting i was gonna be like i know that's what this is all about it was like yeah you want to fuck on the boat yeah and scott fucked a girl on the boat gator gator gator went down to jacksonville and he was like yo you still got that boat i was like yeah he's like uh how do i get in it i was like it's unlocked i mean it's part of the gator didn't like take the boat out to like like the bayou with like a sniper rifle or shotgun and just hunt alligator literally like blasting them like i just imagine him tossing dynamite into the water like he seemed like that type of guy toss the dynamite in the water and like all the dead fish come up and be like that's fishing

he's done it before sorry about your boat kyle smells like semen and fish now i wouldn't know. Gator went down there and I was like, yeah, help yourself. I guess he took a chick on it and there was a gas stove in there. He cooked her dinner on the stove and then he fucked her in my boat bed

and got up out of there. That was a silly mistake. That was silly. Don't buy a boat, kids. Don't choose White boy as your investment is your property investment partner because he may or may not get skittish when his girlfriend tells him it might be a bad idea when there's 17 hours to go until yeah about 17 hours to go hey he would have made we'd each cleared like a hundred thousand dollars of profit by now and we'd'd have had a Florida residence this whole time.

Yeah, you would have had that place. You would have had that place, and you could have literally still just been milking it. It's probably still going up. We could have had it on Airbnb this whole time. You could have had passive rental income the whole time. Yeah, absolutely. My great-grandmother had an apartment in South Beach and sold it in the early 70s. had a an apartment in south beach and sold it in like the early 70s so yeah because an apartment like that that that location on south beach today is like you know we're talking millions i'm sure

it's i'm sure it's probably tens of millions you know it must be it must be it must be like 10 million i don't know what the fuck i'm talking about i just know south beach is bumping so so we did so today is wed, for everyone who's listening. If you're a patron, you just got it. It's Wednesday night or early Thursday morning. So if you want to be a patron, links down below. Sign up and everything. Get the show early.

But yesterday, which was, of course, Tuesday, when we record PKN, you also want to be a patron for that if you want the video, we were discussing Wings of Redemption surgery. And I got a small detail wrong. I said that he was getting the lap band surgery. And that is incorrect.

He is getting the gastric bypass surgery. Not to be confused with a gastrectomy. Now the gastrectomy is when they completely cut out and remove like 80% of your stomach. then and then connect the banana shaped remaining stomach directly to the large intestine right now that's permanent that means the rest of his life he would have to eat uh really sparingly and he'd have all these

little complications like i don't i don't know if you can drink soda i know he can't drink soda right away but like maybe never carbonated soda again. He doesn't like that idea, so he's getting the gastric bypass in which they separate his stomach. Yeah, it's like a stapled thing, right? Yeah, so there's going to be... That's what Boogie got, right? Oh, I thought Boogie got his stomach excised. I don't know what Boogie got, to be fair.

Oh, okay. But the gastric bypass is when they separate the stomach into two stomachs. One very small one, and that one is one, and that one is utilized. And there's just the remaining stomach left unused, basically, but still there. So I believe in that situation, they can go in, you know, when he drops all the weight, presumably, undo the surgery, and now he's got a normal stomach again. That's what he wants to do.

And I said it was a lap band. And and i started thinking why would i say that it was let's let's listen to what he said because this is what uh these this is a clip of wings from probably yesterday the top one i just linked it it's the pka stats streamable thing roger that all right okay i'm ready uh one moment Yeah, I've got it queued at zero. He looks like a thumb, by the way. Jesus. Alright, this will work. I'm queued at zero when you guys are ready.

Which one is this? It's the one that has PKA stats. The most recent one. Are we ready? Yep. Ready, set, play. ...lung doctor will. So that's four specialists and a primary care physician. Alright.

So that's five doctors that you might have to go to at any given time. What Kyle said was completely wrong. Stupid Kyle. Most of the shit Kyle says is completely wrong. Kyle also said I was getting the gastric bypass.

He also said I was getting my surgery done on June 12th instead of July 12th. We know the actual dates now. We just don't say them. They don't know a fucking thing about me.

And everything they say is 90% wrong. What? I'm glad we're getting 10%, right? This ain't sneak dissing, Kyle. The motherfucker can't listen to something and repeat it pervade him he's excellent at that I can't repeat it pervade him type of guy you got that oh cuz you're such a big pervade him it appears that one of the things I got right was when I said that one of the 10% that I got right was when I said that he has a tenuous grasp on the English language.

Pervatum. You can take that from me. Pervatum. So I started wondering, how could I get this wrong? Why would I say that it was lap band? Because I knew it wasn't lap band, but I said it was lap band, and I couldn't understand how I could get that wrong. was lap band and i couldn't understand how i could get that wrong and then i remembered i just had been on the wings of redemption change.org page where there is a petition to make him uh come forward and release the details of his surgery because he's lied so many times in the past about

actually getting the surgery and he hasn't gotten it and uh so if you go here to somebody just they're signing it right now someone made this yeah and 136 people have signed it that's well we're gonna see if we can pump those numbers up because those are rookie numbers yo it just went up right now who signed it right now while we're talking who did that i signed it a moment ago so so what they're saying here is that wings has been donated twenty thousand dollars and he uh he that $13,000 of that is just going to pay his house off for the second time. And so that's like 65-70% of the money raised is just going to pay off his house. And so I started wondering, I was scrolling through this, and I remembered,

if you go to this video right here, it's time stamped, this is PKA 35. Now this was pretty recent though right kyle no the lies stretch back for nearly a decade so so i'm cute oh this is like so now this is like this is like on like a fraudulent level essentially yes because like this is like uh you know you get you get banned across all types of of social platforms if you claim like you're a charity or you need something for charity and you take advantage of people. So I see why people want the proof now. Wow. This was uploaded in December 2010.

Let's queue at seven minutes. I mean, did you guys see what Fireman Kandor said two days ago? I don't know who that is. It's got 14 hearts at the bottom of the page what did he say write it read it for us no i will not is it mean of course it's the internet what do you think uh my bad hang on i gotta read it he says because wings is a fat fuck that sends his grandmother out for groceries then doesn't even help her unload them when she gets back home. How does he know that?

Is his sister Fireman, whatever? Well, it's known. Like, you see it happen live on the show. That literally happens. Let's queue up at 7 minutes and 10 seconds on Painkiller Ready 35. I'm ready. I'm ready. Yo, this is like murder mystery shit, Matthews.

Wait, hold on. I got to give Woody an ad first. You're not YouTube Red? Come on, baby. It's rough times right now. I'm not skipping Woody's ad. Come on. Okay, now I'm ready.

Three, two, one, play. A little bit about it before we started broadcasting. So Wings of Redemption is closing in on his lap band surgery. He's talked about it now and then on his channel. This is 2010. It's almost been this unattainable dream, right? This whole YouTube thing, for the last 18 months, he's been working

and striving to build up the kind of money to have this lap band surgery, which should be life-changing, give him a whole new body type, new self-image, etc. And it looks like it's going to happen in the next three months, right? Is that on target? January. January.

Wow. Next month. January what? Two days. 18th. You have a date? January 18th? You already scheduled it?

Yeah. Two and a half weeks away. Wow. Yeah. Do you have to go in and do some type of interview deal? Yeah. I had to go to a doctor. They specialize in it. um well what we're going

to do what reason it's taken two weeks is he's going to try to get the insurance to pay for it because he's deemed it necessary so there there he is once again looking for the lap band surgery and then of course there's this video wait so he got that that that amount of money in 2010 uh no smart enough he he was trying to get it in 2010 and he told and he lied to all of us on this show and told us that that he was getting the surgery in two weeks the lap band surgery that's the important part in my opinion that at that point it was the lap band surgery surgery. And if we watch this video here, this is time stamped at 2 minutes and 56 seconds. This is from Wing's channel.

I'm ready. Hold on, let me put on my ad block. Oh, God. I don't have it. I don't have it. This video is from March 2012. Yeah. So a couple of years later.

Two years later. Well, a year and a half later. Yeah. I am ready. As long as Harley isn't watching an ad. He's losing this game bad. Don't insult his gaming skills.

When you first brought this up, my biggest confusion was, why is he playing Siege on PlayStation? I feel like that's a very difficult game to get away with on PlayStation. But anyways, I digress. Let's continue. Are we ready?

Yes. Ready, set, play. Actually to basically make it so I could get out from under all this stuff, I'm basically going to try to save up and get the lap band surgery. I know I talked about this a year ago at this time, getting the lap band, but I'm just going to save up the money And get it out right Because every time I seem to start losing weight

Something hits me and I backslide I'm sorry Wings You're right I was wrong Because I listened to you Boom Roasty Someone sent him a list of burn centers

Next time he streams. It's time and time again. And, I mean, by the way, just so you know, Taylor earns more than enough to pay for your surgery in one month without pity donations. So chew on that one. And be sure to chew slowly now that your stomach is the size of a golf ball wait so did he do the surgery no nobody has it scheduled and i think i know the real dates

but he's had it scheduled since december 2010 fair counterpoint that's literally like epic mealtime started like 40 days before that broadcast. He schedules things the way the fucking World Cup does. Where is it going to be in 2026? Qatar. That's the way he's scheduling shit. 15 years out. It's going to be in Mexico in 2018. It's scheduled.

It seems like it's different this time. It doesn't matter. You know what? He won't do it if he doesn't do it. And then in 2020, he'll get another 20 grand dangling this carrot in front of everyone because his superpower is getting people to, you know, get on his side again. I know the flights are booked because I was there when Kitty booked them for him. Oh, there you go. Finally.

Turns out someone lied. Like always. Wait, what? Yeah, you calling Wings of Redemption a liar? Remember those flights were... How dare you, good sir? Months and months ago? No. Kitty had to help him book them just the other day. Remember he said,

oh, it's no big deal. You can just reschedule those flights anytime you want. And everyone who's actually flown is like, wait, what? Uh-uh. You can't just willy-nilly change. You better look out because Emilio and Roberto might show up at the gate with our disguises on, ready to pick him up and take him to some San Diego flop house and abandon him. If that happens, Pablo's stopping by, too. Manuel is not on board with this four drivers uh harley up with your idea kyle yeah yeah we so i know when he's landing and

where he's landing and the gate number of course and all that stuff and i was joking like like it'd be funny if me and chiz got went to san diego and i know there's people in the san diego area because they do comic-con and everything there to do like full prosthetic makeup on us and make us look like mexican drivers and show up there with a sign that has his name on it and pick him up at the airport and basically kidnap his ass and uh and just take him off somewhere weird and fuck with him um of course you know that's i thought you're gonna say and fuck him by the way for a second i was like's... I thought you were going to say, and fuck him, by the way, for a second. I was like, oh, I like where this is going. You better film it

at that point. I want to fuck that big, dirty belly button of his. That's what I want. Evidence. His belly button is seven inches deep. You could just... I could get half of it in there, you're saying. There will be no belly button, because they pour it out like the way geologists make

soil samples, apparently. This is from the Cretaceous period. He did think that you lose your belly button after that surgery. You have to count the rings to see. I think it's really great if you guys do all that prosthetic stuff and then he gets in the car but you just drive him home.

You just bring him home. You just bring him back. It'd be a long fucking drive, right? I've been going east for 16 hours. I'm not sure if this is the right way. Gas the car. Just have some, like, some breathers, rebreathers hidden in somewhere, and just gas the car

so he's out. Yeah, exactly. Chloroform his ass, and then just put him in the backseat, and then just be like, you're here. Wow. I look forward to him getting a surgery. I want to see the aftermath and I hope he loses all the weight because I think he'll look really weird. Instead of a thumb, he's going to be a pinky.

Well, I want you to know, I know someone who, their dad did the gastric bypass and like beat it. He like just he he like he ate and got sick and like ate and got sick and like just continued and and did it and just like apparently like pop the staples off and everything and like was just like he's back to normal like he just beat that game like he it was almost like it was a challenge for him i guess that's like a heroin addiction

level of food addiction, to eat through your stomach staples as you're like, oh, this hurts. It's so terrible. Oh, I need five more sleeves of Oreos. Now. Exactly. You just force it down to where your gullet's filling up.

Oh, that sounds fucking terrible. This is what's going to happen. I think he's going to get the surgery, because I know it's all booked and scheduled and stuff, and he'll just get on the plane and make it happen. I think there is a chance he won't, and he'll just get on the plane and make it happen. I think there is a chance he won't because he has a history of backing out last second.

But I think he's going to do it and I think it's going to work. At least in the short term it'll work. And the whole world will be shocked and amazed at his progress. There'll be another level of Wings of Redemption resurgence as his look is transformed into that of a thinner man. I think that's going to happen in the next year and a half.

And then he's already saving up for the skin surgery, which I think we've talked about. The skin surgery is even more expensive than the weight loss surgery, right? He said that he's not getting it. And some people think the skin surgery is like a bad thing and stuff. But I'd be psyched if he needs that skin surgery. That suggests a level of success that most people thought he would never have. That skin surgery is a badge of honor for having achieved something.

I think you crossed that bridge at a certain point, you know, but definitely anyone who goes down that path, that's what you're going to want to do because you're going to feel better, and the only thing that's going to be holding you back is feeling better is that what it once was, you know, like you're going to feel better, and the only thing that's going to be holding you back is a feeling better is that what it once was. You're going to be hanging. Yeah, exactly. Boogie spoke about that even.

Yeah. You can see people in public who haven't got the skin surgery yet. You probably noticed they always have their shirts tucked in to their pants, and they'll be like a skinny-looking dude, like a skinny-fat kind of look, but not like an obese person. and they'll be like a skinny looking dude, like a skinny fat kind of look, but not like an obese person. And you can see like the folds of their skin, like hanging into that,

like, you know, polo pouch. Or it's like, they tuck in their shirt and their belly. They like tuck their belly in. Yeah. Yeah.

A high percentage of Lowe's employees have this. I'm not, I'm not sure. The grocery store or the Home Depot store? The Home Depot store. Yeah. I? The Home Depot store, yeah. I'm sure Home Depot's the same. Yeah, I hope he gets it, and I think he will. I think Kyle's going to win that $5. Yeah, I'm winning that $5.

Woody and I have a bet. We bet that whether he would or would not get the surgery within this calendar year, and I said he would, and Woody said he wouldn't, and I was terrified that I had lost my bet and I was going to be out the big five buckaroonies for months now. Now I have that fear. Yes, yes. Let me do a couple ad reads,

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All the things that beds are meant for. All the things that beds are meant for. So check them out. Harley, have you ever had any kind of sexual intercourse on an aeroplane? You know it? No, I haven't, actually.

No? No. I never did that. I got a handy one time, but it was very awkward and scary. Why was it so scary? Because I was afraid we were going to get caught, and they were going to put me on a no-fly list or something, and I was flying so much at the time, that would be a huge deal. here's the thing i'm curious about like let's say like let's

say you're in the back of the plane yeah and you're getting handy the stewardess walks by and she looks at both and she goes what is going on here and you look her right in the eye you're like nothing nothing at all how will she have the or he have the ability to put you on a no-fly zone when at the end of the day it's like well you're gonna believe her or are you gonna believe both of us i think they'll believe her i i think if like this matronly you know 45 year old flight attendant goes up the cockpit and is like cap captain stewart uh there's a captain stewart comes to the back and you just do this. Oh, what? I was doing it the whole time. Excuse me? A hand job?

You think? This guy thinks I'd get a hand job now. If anything, I'd masturbate. Get out of here. At one point, I saw it. I saw it. I just feel like. I've got a little.

It is a crime. It is a crime but like if I walked outside and the guy was like jerking off on the street and I like grabbed him by the ear and called the Cops and the cops came and i'm holding this man down. I'm like he was just jerking off. They'd be like, okay, uh Uh It's time for a penis lineup Michael jackson did that.

That could work, but I'm assuming you got this handy under your sweater or under a blanket. Yeah, there was a blanket. We used one of those Delta Airline blankets. I'm sure you didn't stand up in the aisle and put one leg up on the seat that you were sitting in before while she's seated and doing it. What level of privacy did you have?

People were in the seats across the hallway. I wasn't getting jerked off at all. And then the guy in front of me was like, air marshal here. I saw the whole thing. We had pretty good privacy. Oh, peeping Tom over here. He was peeping at nothing, though, because we didn't do anything. We were in the back of the plane.

And the situation was that I had a first class ticket and she had a coach ticket, and I left first class to join her, and everybody in first class applauded for me. I'd give you a hand if you did that for me. Right? And I got back there, and it was just she and I with three seats to ourselves, and no one else was around us. The only other people were in front of us. So there's nobody behind us, nobody to the left of us. So we had as much privacy as you can get on a plane. I have a different scenario.

We have a video here. You see this link here? It's before the video. Wait, so real quick. If I get a Handy on a paramotor and I'm the only one there, is that cool or uncool? No, that's a hate crime. You're talking about jerking off? You're talking about jerking off in the sky?

Look, I like it my way better. They call that a supply drop. Ropes across the aisle. I like the idea of the pilot coming in the back and you being there in the pilot like, I want these motherfucking ropes off this motherfucking plane.

So I'm queued at zero on this video. I am ready. Is the video where it says watch the full video, that's what I'll click on? I assume. Yeah, that has to be it. I'm on the top.

Scroll down. Do you want to watch the Twitter or the other one? They're the same thing. I'm on the top one because that one has a better player. Oh, yeah. I'm ready. I hope. Ready, set, play.

So, basically, we're looking at a rear-facing camera. This couple is holding their phone up. And behind them, in the back of the plane, kind of like what I described a moment ago, there is a girl riding this guy. And they are fucking right there on the plane in their seat. Good for them. I thought the traditional way to do this was to go to the bathroom. It is. Yeah, but you know,

that's rude, because other people have to go to the bathroom. This isn't bothering anyone. Look at that lady with a hat on who's just asleep and has no idea. I think they're macking too. She's going to load back there, but she's going to hop off and drip cum everywhere She's gonna have a couple

A couple loogies creeping down her inner thigh Yeah imagine if you're the next person To sit in that seat Or if you're in the more likely scenario You're the flight attendant Who has to go back and like wipe the loads down Like you're working the booths At an adult theater.

I might be fucked up. I don't find that to be that offensive if there's no kids around. Harley, I think you're muted. I don't know if you did that way on purpose. Yeah, it's not that offensive. I agree with you. As long as there's no kids, I don't really care. I wouldn't want to be the guy in that third seat.

Well, he did not pull out, so we'll see. Well, she can keep it in there until she deplains. I think we lost you, Harley. I can't hear in there until uh i think we lost she deplains yeah i don't think that's how it works i mean i'm not very well but yeah harley you're muted oh i heard a click as you jiggled something be right back yeah i think hello there you are there you go i would i would fuck on a plane. Lost your video. I was going to say that I feel like that is not enough evidence

anyways, even though it is what it is. I'd be like, yo, the seatbelt light was off and she came and sat on my lap and no one said we couldn't do that. And why did the stewardess come and tell us to not do it? They would have seen very well that we weren't having sex. And look, you can see my pants are on over there.

Yes, but you ordered the lasagna and it smells like fish. This is me, by the way. This is me in the video. I did it. That was me. I just feel like, I don't know. Yeah, unless they run a rape kit on her. Just deny it.

The shaggy defense. How could they prove it? Is that enough evidence? I mean, we see videos of people literally getting shot by other people. We're like, I don't know. Self-defense. But this one, it's like, no, you're not. This is completely different from what you think it is.

I know it looks bad, but it's not it. You cannot prove that my penis was in her. I know I bring this up repeatedly, but the shaggy defense is perfect here. It's that song, you know, but you saw me in the bathroom. It wasn't me, but you saw me in the bathroom. It wasn't me. It's called, it's when

a legal strategy when the defendant flatly denies guilt despite overwhelming evidence against them. That's what you're suggesting here, the shaggy defense. Yeah, I was like, that's me. Well, we weren't doing that. Common banging on the airplane? It wasn't banging.

Row 38A, yes. And your girlfriend was in 38B? Yes. And those two passengers were having intercourse. No, that wasn't me. And your girlfriend was in 38B? No, she was also in 38A. Have you guys ever done anything like that?

Not like that, on a plane, but in the bathroom of a plane? I haven't done that. I never have. I don't have any plane fucking stories. I've done locations. Or you shouldn't. One time, a long time ago, I flirted with a girl. I'm too big for that. I don't care. I don't want to be

a part of the Mahi. I'd have to literally... I'm in there trying to piss and trying not to piss on myself when I'm in there just pissing. You can't fit another human being in there with me. I forgot how tall you were. Are you 6'4"? 6? What are you? 5? 6'5".

6'6". 6, seven on Tinder, you know? Six, seven on Tinder. When I was, when I was. That's when you get to the point of too tall. Like, if I see someone who's taller than six, six, I like, what goes through my head is like someone who's gangly and like the proportions didn't fill out right. Like, you know, if you put six, seven,

you're like, oh, I don't want to see this guy. His pants are gonna be too short. He's gonna be wearing big, weird, shiny Velcro shoes. He's gonna be like, oh, I don't want to see this guy. His pants are going to be too short. He's going to be wearing big, weird, shiny Velcro shoes. He'll be like, I'm tall. It's the only thing Amazon delivers. My size. Size 19. It's true.

What's the weirdest place? You said you've done it a couple times and you know inappropriate locations well when i was uh when i was uh like a football player uh like i hooked up with a cheerleader on the team under the bleachers like after a game and i was outside in nido that was cool nice nice did you have her like grabbing on to like the hex bars or whatever underneath it as you were giving it to her or were you on the grass being real dirty no there's no grass it was like it was actually like pavement under that and she was just like forward like holding like the the bleacher bar and i was like behind her pumping like you know hands on my hips do you feel like dope as fuck it was it was more

like i didn't even need to finish or enjoy it. It was just like it was in high school. So back then it was like, yo, we got to do it because then we did it and then it's done. And then it's like a thing that I did that I'm so cool and I could tell my friends I did it. And that's the most important part is that people know that I have sex, not that I do it or I'm good or I enjoy it or anything. It's just to tell people that I'm doing my part. That someone thinks highly enough of me to let me stick my cock in her pussy. Yeah. Oh, I used to be like that all the time. I used to always be like to let me stick my cock in her pussy. Yeah. Oh, I used to be like that all the time.

I used to always be like, oh, thank you for that, by the way. Thank you so much for doing that with me. You used to say that? Yeah, I used to always be like, I was like, thank you. They'd be like, what the fuck are you talking about? I'd be like, just to, you know,

fuck an unfuckable ogre like me. talking about i'd like just to you know fucking unfuckable ogre like me i use i mean like me i like my biggest like epic mealtime like my biggest smelly is like just like basically like busting bacon grease i used to sit there and be like i'd look at the girls i'd be like why are you doing this yeah you don't want to do this because you get a million views of video you could have had muscles glasses. How is he nowadays? Do you know? Well, he's vegan.

He's 100% vegan. He does CrossFit. Doesn't eat any meat. I didn't see that coming. Him and Tyler, they're both vegan guys. They don't eat any meat. And listen, man. I mean, it was years ago.

I like the guys. I respect their life decisions. But it was years ago. I mean, now it's 2018. I hate to say it to all the people that loved old Epic Mealtime. I called it. Called it. I knew it.

They weren't dedicated to the cause. And, you know, one little bump and they go full vegan like that and nothing against vegans by the way but you know obviously it doesn't fit within the epic mealtime brand i just find it funny that like you know muscles glasses is like 100 vegan crossfit it makes me feel like epic mealtime was like an abusive boyfriend and he's like a girl and he's like i'm never gonna be with someone like that again. Only eat carrots now. Now, he left with a little cloud of conflict, right? Am I right about that? Yeah.

Well, what happened was, like, essentially it was like six months of a back and forth of, you know, him being like, you know, essentially asking to get paid more than myself and anyone else got or anything like that. And I don't blame him. He was young and a lot of people you know forced his hand to an extent and after six months of like discussing it i was kind of like at one day i woke up and i was like yeah you haven't been on for six months and the show's still going on so i'm not so worried about your leverage because we're still existing and it's no longer like it like people still miss him and people still want him and i loved having the character on the show i actually always preferred to work with tyler and i like

tyler's input on the show muscles glasses tyler he more like big chains and stuff and like you know he was like a like had like kind of like a gangster goofy mental vibe uh but he was actually fun and funny and he was like you know very comedic alex was just like you know jacked and and ate the food but uh it wasn't like he was a professional eater or anything like that he was just like a uh you know he had big biceps called the muscle glasses a great character the character was great i felt like the editing enough to not wear sunglasses on camera the editing made muscles glasses into a big character sometimes you didn't do anything you just sort of zoom in on them and you had one episode where he

like it was him and furious pete like they did a poutine eating contest in montreal and the video still up there and uh like pete man pete literally ate who's actually a legit professional eater ate like 80 of this gigantic poutine while muscles like slowly ate 20 and like on one of the last bites muscles just barf automatic you lose so we lost and i went over to the winning team and i was like oh man so cool you guys be muscle glasses furious pete your legends are like yeah thanks i'm like can i see the trophy they're like yeah and i like went and i like turned around like i was like yo alex hold it for a second and our cameraman was across the room who you didn't see and he's now filming

furious pete and alex holding the trophy and then i took it back to them and i gave it to him like hey man there you go and they're like cool and then we edited and cut that video right away and then the montreal gazette newspaper published based on our video that they want on so they wrote they want everything like that i was a part of this like huge lying conspiracy legitimately he's just actually like was an actor like he played a part and he got he got paid to eat bacon and That's why I had a big issue with like the falling out cuz I was like dude, man We're paying for your school and we paid flight for you to go from Montreal back to LA

We fly down like once a month because you're working at school and that one day a month we film you in like four different bacon strip shirts to make it look like four different episodes and then you're gone for a month and you get a salary like only only someone like you know like that maybe wouldn't have had a full-time real job at the point at that time wouldn't have realized how good that was yeah and you got to realize everyone would be like oh Harley's such a kike or whatever like that but i was driving a sentra you know i was driving like a nissan central like i was not chewing it up like how i could have been chewing it up i could have been a fucking boat i could have been living with white boy seven street in miami florida you know but like instead like you know i wasn't even doing anything myself so i was just like i was like bro

let's not beat around the bush you get paid to fucking eat bacon once a month like relax like like relax with all this and so we never lined up on it it never made sense and so i when i came to montreal i was like tyler's gonna be in a video and i would like for you to be in the video too and if you don't come to the video i'll consider that you resign from the company and tyler showed up that day but he didn't show up that day. So I sent him a letter being like, okay, I accept your resignation. Unfortunately, you know, I wish it could have been amicable, but you just went dark for six months.

And that was that. But then like four days later, my brother hits me up and he's like, don't respond. And I was like, what are you talking about? He's like, just don't respond. And then I get a message from my manager. He's like, it's best to ignore these types of things i'm like what the fuck is going on and then i went and looked and it's like an article being like harley lied to me and said i would get millions of dollars and he said that i was gonna get this and he's a lying jew and and

and and i don't like that the business was like a business and it wasn't fun it was all about a business it's like damn man this show was a business for me like that the business was like a business and it wasn't fun. It was all about a business. It's like, damn, man, this shit was a business for me from the beginning. From the very beginning, I was the only one that was putting thousands of dollars into it. I was putting my name on it. If the fourth episode caught fire and burnt my mom's house down, it's not anything. Nothing's happening. It's all bad. There's nothing else.

We almost burnt the house down ages ago. But it was funny because the whole sentiment, I'm sure that article is still out there. It was like Harley said it's not fun anymore. It's a business. And Harley said this and we didn't get that. And you should give me millions of dollars. It was like nonsense. So after that, I was like, well, that's dumb.

I felt like there's a way to go. If you quit your job, okay, quit your job, you know? But don't go and be like, I quit my job and I didn't like the way he runs his business. Because even though I did, I thought I was nice and I thought I was very loyal. And I've always – I've been loyal more than anything to everyone that's ever worked at Epic Mealtime. I always felt like that it was just so weird to leave and be like i am like the way he ran his business out of the business don't write an article saying you didn't like it to what to appeal to 13 year olds and 14 year olds but at the end of the day it's funny because

that like no one jumped to his side really because they you know they just called me a jew but they didn't support him on future endeavors because it was like man you got paid to eat bacon once a month. Why would people really back that? You had a great job. Absolutely. I remember when you did – you were in LA doing the Star Wars episode with Chris Hardwick, and you were kind enough to invite me in. And me and Muscles were having a dream.

Well, I appreciate that. I was happy to help if that if that was the case i always had fun there was a higher chance that we were gonna be slamming me and muscles sorry continue and i was saying that that would be that too they usually showed up when we were together i fucked two of the i fucked a couple of those chicks that showed up to to the ski lot one of those chicks never mind um so and ski lodge. One of those chicks that... Never mind. So, and me and Muscles Glasses were gonna like... And we were drinking

Incredible Hulks for some reason, which is hypnotic and Hennessy mixed together. And you poured us a glass like this. Like a... Full! Full! That's how I knew it was gonna be a good episode. And I was like... I drink all of mine. And I look look over at muscles and he has

sipped that motherfucker down like like this much and i'm like what you didn't drink it and in the editing of course it makes it look like we both finish our glasses or whatever meanwhile i'm outside like forcing myself to vomit in an alley to try to get the poison out of my system and i'm blasted for the rest of the night. That was the one where you broke the bottle and ate out of it, right? No, that was another one. That was still, I remember getting on the plane and I was like, yo guys, wasn't it fucked up what Kyle did there?

With that bottle? I'm like, that dude's fucked up. He's got a knife that shoots the blade off, also. And they were like, whatever man, he's got a knife that shoots the blade off also. And they were like, whatever, man. He's got a boat. We don't even have boats, so we're leaving. Go.

Seems like the Epic Mealtime guys were very singularly focused on Kyle's boat aspect of his life. Did you like managing Harley? That's part of your gig, right? You actually manage people and try to keep them happy and stuff. Do you find that that sucks or do you like it? I have to be – like essentially my role, what I did come into doing, a major aspect of my role is literally being a cheerleader. That's what CEOs do essentially at major corporations is they're cheerleaders. They keep people happy and they get the the morale

going and like if there's issues and stuff and they oversee it all and like for me like i i like i used to watch like you know i'd look at the backstreet boys or something like that at night or the n-sync and i'd be like i wonder if the other guys are bothered by justin timberlake or if they're mad that they would sneeze child yeah exactly i used to think like that and be like i i wonder how i would feel in that scenario you know i i guess like to an extent it's like i did kind of feel like what it was like to be in a band and it was a lot of elements were like a boy band and like i used to deal with stuff in the early days. People would come up to me and be like, yo, how come that guy was the last bite? I'm like, I don't know.

So I'll edit you last bite next episode. But I edited him last bite. And he's like, yo, I appreciate you editing me last bite. But the guy who got last bite last episode, how come he was first bite this time then? Last bite then first bite and i'm like okay so please you first and then it was like we go on trips and trips are like you know how rare it is that like a trip would be like yeah we want to have all six of you idiots here you know they would be like uh harley and two other guys so i would rotate them you know like

alex and tyler came to see you guys. But on another trip, I went to go do Gymkhana with Amir. And then on Vegas trip, I went with Josh. You know, I rotated the guys. I always switched them around. I was constantly trying to make everyone happy. And I think if I would go back in time, and I know it's like it'll sound jaded now, but it's not. I think it would just be the right thing to have done is to just go there and have been like, fuck everyone.

Muscles, glasses goes on every trip. He's the most popular. Even though I'm the least closest with Alex as a person outside of the scope of this, the audience has spoken and I shall only bring Alex with me and everyone else, you guys should understand that. But I didn't do that. I tried to like, you try and make everyone happy and you end up making no one happy. And it's more important that you're just like, this is it. This is how it'll be. And that's the way

that's the best for the product. And I never did that. I always tried to wear my friend hat and my business hat. But when you're wearing your friend hat for a minute and then be like, oh no, this is one for the business hat. People are like, man, it's not fun for you anymore it's just a business and it's like no the whole thing's a fucking business i was just trying to wear my friend hat because we're actually friends also yeah but i i know that if i go back in time if i just be lying to one thing and didn't try and make people happy all of them and just did what was best for the show that's probably what would work out the most but but juggling the politics was always the the one thing i did not like to do and i didn't enjoy and it would be like you know someone's writing and they're like he only writes funny jokes for

him and then someone's editing they're like he always edits the best shots for him and it's like there was always something and then when it turns like when the whole thing boils over they're just like, Harley's a crazy angry Jew that promised everyone millions of dollars and kept it in the back of his, the trunk of his Sentra. Harley's fucking, Harley's fucking like, literally like, I, like, I, I will tell you this. Okay. And I promise you, this is the truth. I did not have the biggest ego on epic meal time and i can comfortably say i have a big ego and i always have had that to an extent but i i had been grounded before that i i had like you know i had like family members are just like you're not that cool you're not that high whereas

everyone else were just being like yo like harley can't do this shit without you, B. And there were some major egos. One person that's never had an ego in this, ever, a mirror. Never had an ego. Was never like, you should give me more of this or anything like that. One of the challenges I used to have when running WoodyCraft is a lot of people would work for me because they wanted to be my friend. So here I am. I think I because they wanted to be my friend. You know, so here I am. I think I'm paying them to be community manager.

And I think in their head, or whatever it was, developer, game this or that, or all the jobs. To them, a lot of what they wanted was for me to spend massive amounts of time with them in TeamSpeak. And they would come to me every so often and be like, Woody, in the last three weeks, you know, we've hardly hung out. And it's like, yeah, I know that's not what I like.

Oh my God. You're like, I hired you cause I'm really busy, man. Yeah. Like, you know, like,

and like, if I'm team speak with you the whole time, every step, like that, I'm just going to do it myself. Yeah. Like you're, you exist.

Cause this is like my time with my kids. Yeah. And, uh, I, I could go on. I'm afraid people would start getting me and figure out who was who like we had an employee and at the end i got ghosted like so everyone worked from home right it's not like we had an office or anything and uh woody craft is slowing down and i'm starting to like you know lay people off and just you know close the doors and they work from home. So you like, I don't carefully keep up on like what they're doing and just ghosted,

just sort of stopped working, kept collecting pay, of course, but just stopped working. And, uh, that's the way to do it eventually. Well, it turned out not to be, cause I was going to give out a severance that I thought was fair, you know, bonuses. And I was, yeah, I was not fucking around with it. Like it was like a generous guy. I talked to my father about it and you're like, what's right and wrong in this? And, you know, how do we how do we do this professionally?

And then it's like, well, fuck, they're not going to reply to me for the last two weeks. That's your fucking minuscule severance. You know, I tried to contact you about your bonus but you ghosted me yeah so you didn't get one that's how i divided i divided up divided it up amongst the the good employer harley when when you came to our house down in georgia i felt like that was a ridiculous night were there other shoots that were like that because just to like lay it out there like we had those two crazy bitches that we found in south carolina who literally got so rowdy and out of shape she was like i'm a lawyer and then she like got naked and like videos are

somewhere somewhere i have those videos of her big pepperoni nipples and and like her on the floor with like magic marker all over her face. Look at him. He's remembering the pepperoni. Is this from the ski trip? No. Oh, no. You would have remembered this. No, what happened at the ski trip is at one point, it started to get into a party, right?

You say cigar and what? Someone put a cigar in someone else's butt. Someone put a cigar in someone's butt. I wasn't there for that. At some point was no good it turned into it was your butt at some point it turned into a party and i was like one like this isn't where i should be i'm a married man and two i'm like a drag on this whole thing right these guys all potentially gonna fuck each other and i'm old and out of it and what like so i went back to my room me and kyle are just fucking and you're like i'm gonna go to bed now so yeah well there were

girls there so i went to my room and i at one point i heard someone loudly making orgasm noises now i don't think that they were actually like fucking on the coffee table downstairs or whatever. I'm picturing it being some kind of show, striptease act. Like I don't know what's happening, but I'm listening to it through the door of my room. And do you remember the orgasm noises? Not that specifically, but I do remember things getting crazy. Being like, man, Woody, how? Where's Woody? Man, that guy hates me.

I'm stupid. Right, right. No, you didn't want me there. Like you didn't want me during that part of the... Where's Woody? Man, that guy hates me. Right, right. No, you didn't want me there. You didn't want me during that part. I would have just behaved, watched from the side like a creepy old person. That's actually the best part. You know who did do exactly what you're describing? All right, so there was the guy that owned the place.

We rented out the entire ski lodge. And there was the guy who owned the place and he had a friend who was like maybe 70 this old guy this old fucking dude i played chess with him was what woody is describing he was the creepy old dude who was just hanging around in the background like we were like downstairs in like the rec room and one of the girls was like giving me a lap dance like wasn't anything like sexual anything but the girls was giving me a lap dance. It wasn't anything sexual or anything, but she was giving me a lap dance. A little sexual, maybe? I mean, a little, I guess.

It was a lap dance, but all of our clothes were on and everything, and it was just kind of a fun thing. It was just silly. There was music playing, and the old guy is like, excuse me, we had a game of pool going here, because he was playing pool with the girl a moment before, and I'm just like who fucking cares who fucking cares about your goddamn pool game her ass is on my on

my crotch over here we're dancing over here we're having a good time like like before i went to bed i i think the first night and mind you this is vermont if you're American, that's cold in January. Oh yeah, this much. It blizzard like two feet recently. And she pulls out, she's in a bikini. And I remember her saying like, yeah, this bikini's like saggy here and here. I'm saving my hot one for tomorrow night.

I don't know what happened that next night, but I imagine her good bikini was involved. It was great. We went out into the snow and I took pictures. She was wearing boots, a bikini was involved. It was great. We went out into the snow and I took pictures. She was wearing boots, a bikini bottom and a vest. This is true? It was great. We went out in the snow and had a photo shoot.

I took pictures of her wearing the whole getup. It was great. The next morning, things went awry. I remember we sent her to we went up the street to like a neighbor's house where there's like a party and we sent her in and she walked by herself to like a party so they're having this party and you saw through the glass we were watching from far and she like goes

up to the door like the neighbors which was like probably like a five minute walk away and like knocks on the door and they open the door and there's just like this girl there and they're like what the fuck is she in the middleini like this is how horror movies start no okay yeah yeah she was uh she was looking for something but they didn't have it the next morning she was like i my impression is she might have found something somewhere during the night because the next morning she was just blitzed and she's hanging on me like on my shoulder and stuff and it's like girl i don't know can't touch me like this look i won't describe look i won't describe which girl or anything because of certain things but like there was a girl let us just say that i went

upstairs with and uh harley was like suck his dick from down the hallway and I was like maybe she I didn't do that I'm kidding you did exactly that and and I think she was gonna but then she produced some Vicodin and started crushing it up on the nightstand and snorting it and I had never seen that

before I saw I saw that move as well and I was like that is not something I would ever do and she looks up at me real silly eyed real real glazed over and she's like you want some and she offers me like a rolled up 20 and as she does it crumbles of pill fall out of her nostril and i was like you know what? I actually have a girl waiting back in my bed. Think I'm gonna call it a night.

And that was the point where the other chick vomited on muscles. They were in bed together, and he was just about to get laid, and she threw up on him. Wow. Did anyone fuck Vicodin Chick?

I did not. I'm sure Harley did. Nice. That's a yes we're getting from Harley. Good for him. Good for him. I'm glad he did. That wasn't even the craziest trip in my opinion.

Honestly, when they came down to my place, those two... Yes, Woody, the answer is yes to your question that you typed. Harley, I now know which one it is. And thumbs up. Yeah, she was very pretty. But then when you guys came down to my place, we had found these two

girls in South Carolina who were okay, I guess. And at first, they seemed like normal chicks. One of them was our waitress at a bar. And, uh, the other one was like another waitress at the bar who showed up like the next, the next day and the blonde and the brunette and the brunette at the party at the, at the shoot for Epic Mealtime video is getting blitzed. And she's feeding white boy, Jack Daniels, like she's nursing a baby. She's got literally. And like I remember going outside and being like, hey, hey, don't give him any more alcohol.

He's he's drunk. He's cut off. He's like an Achilles like I come back out there and she's been she's continued to nurse alcohol into him like a baby. And what no one knew is white boy had eaten half a family-sized bag of Reese's Pieces, which he then starts vomiting onto my back porch couch. And he didn't vomit like projectile. He vomited like that guy we saw in L.A. on the side of the street that time. He's like... It's just like...

It's just piddling out of his mouth onto the couch. What does that look like? Is it really orange? Really yellow? It looked like peanut butter. It looked like he was vomiting peanut butter, but it was Reese's Pieces and Jack Daniels. So then the brunette, I don't know.

I guess we coaxed her to get naked, but she's like on her knees. No, we didn't. Those girls just turned it on out of nowhere. And we were like, this went, this happened. I thought, the brunette was a real cock block, first of all. Because like we had the brunette on her knees, topless, with her big pepperoni nipples. And then we all signed her face in Sharpie and her titties in Sharpie.

We all signed. Me and Harley signed her titties and her face in Sharpie while I recorded with my phone. And she was down. Yes. This girl was – first of all, she was older than us. She was fully awake, fully alert. She was fully awake, fully alert. She was a lawyer. And then, like,

somewhere in the way between the two of them, they went crazy. And, like, you had to, like, get them out of there. I don't know. Did you call the cops? Is that what happened? This is what happened. I took the blonde upstairs to my bedroom, which had no privacy. I had a loft bedroom. Like, you're sitting in the living room and you're like, yeah, that's Kyle's bedroom right there.

Don't she come down, like, draped in a Russian flag? Oh, that was for the video. She comes out in the video butt naked, except for a Russian flag. So I'm upstairs fucking the blonde. I'm trying to keep it quiet because, like, there is no space between us and everyone else in the party. Like, you could throw a rock from our bed and hit Harley. Like, we're just elevated up a floor. So I'm fucking her.

And the brunette is downstairs like, get down here, we're leaving. Because she had sobered up a little bit and remembered she had a boyfriend. And I'm just like, fucking bitch, I'm not done up here yet. I'm not finished. And I'm fucking this blonde chick.

And she's like, I guess I gotta go. Really? Without finishing? Yes. That's important. Bitch. I thought so. I mean, I fucked her again after that. But in any case, she goes down, she gets dressed, goes downstairs, and the brunette starts getting... We had already

had this moment where we're shooting the video. Like, the cameras are rolling, and like, you know, know it's epic mealtime isn't scripted scripted but it's choreographed to some extent it's like we're doing the intro now yeah and now we're cooking and we'll do and she's like being loud in the background and giggling and stuff and finally i'm like shut the fuck up or get the fuck out and she acted like i punched her in the face or something i think even like i i think like katie was like trying to coax her outside to go outside and just stop and then i was doing and then one point you were just like

okay like it's fucking enough already and i remember it was just like it it turned so fast and so weird it went like it was like that one shot too many where it was like, party. You do one more shot. And you're like, I don't like you guys. And it's like, I was there and we were all like,

what the fuck happened? They called us and apologize later. And like wrote like a long text to me being like, I hope Kyle forgives us. I was like, I don't think he's even thinking about you guys at all. Yeah. No,

because I'm on the phone with my cop buddy. I'm like, there's two bitches leaving my house fucking drunk as shit right now i was like can you come over here and get them and you come over and arrest him he's like well look here's the here's the thing dude i would be happy to come over there and arrest their asses and take them away but the thing is if they even say that you hit them or abuse them anyway i gotta write up a report and then you get in trouble i'm like we haven't we haven't done anything like that i just want them to fucking leave because they're being like like abusive and violent toward us and they're talking about damaging my property

like they need to go he's like well just see if you can get them to leave without and there's lots of guns just chilling on the couch everywhere is. Is there a law against cock-pocking? Throughout this entire time, by the way, everyone is holding one or two guns in this entire story. Sorry we didn't say that at the beginning. Everyone has guns in their belt, and there's knives everywhere. Gator showed up 20 minutes into the party with a black eye. He had gotten in a fight with two people

and left them knocked out unconscious on a sidewalk somewhere. On the way there, he beat up two people. He's like, why don't you mention what it was about? We were like, this is America. Yeah. Gator was at the gas station getting gas

before he came over because I was like, we got girls, we got booze, we got epic mealtime. Come over here. We got bacon. And so he goes to the gas station get some fuel and he heads over to my house well as he's walking out of the gas station from like getting a soda or whatever these guys are like staring at him and he's staring at them and he didn't think much of it but they apparently took umbrance with his staring and and they follow him down the road and he stops at a stop sign. Gator has resting fight me face. He has resting fight me face.

So Gator is stopped at the stop sign and these guys pull in front of him with their truck and get out and challenge him to a fight and he beats the shit out of both of them and then shows my house all bruised up. He's like, why don't you answer your phone? I'm like, we're like we're working here man he's like i need your backup it looks like he handled it pretty well so uh so yeah that was a ridiculous night i my favorite part of the video is when i

you know i shattered the bottle with the that big ass buoy knife and then scooped up the mashed potatoes or whatever but i stabbed the knife into the table like this far from muscles glass's hand and he barely flinched. I thought that was pretty hardcore. He does it. It's actually – I don't know if his eyes were closed behind his glasses or if he's just in this – he did not move. And I used to replay that. I'd be like, that is so damn impressive.

Yes. You know? But that's actually like – that was his skill. Everyone on Epic Mealtime did have a particular superpower to an extent. on epic mealtime did have a particular superpower to an extent and although we played muscles glasses as eating like his real superpower is encompassed in that moment there like you had this knife a knife that literally one of us touched and like your finger was just split open and like he had it in his pants this was a knife by the way that it was left in our bag we brought it home in our equipment and like josh was like oh cool knife he touched it and his hand was like hanging

and like like alex pulls that i would edit it but that fucking knife like he literally almost like filleted his dick he pulls it out and if you look at that episode you see him pull it out like he literally like he didn't have fear and that's what what he did best like he was excellent at that you know tyler was fucking because i did i did bash the guys a little bit more like tyler's specialty was he's hilarious he's actually one of the funniest guys ever been on epic meal time dave production wise was the only person that was like you know what i'm gonna learn how to produce produce this shit so Harley could pay me to produce it instead of him doing it all the time. And Josh

knew how to cook. Josh really knew how to cook and he knew how to make cool recipes. Everyone had a special ability. Literally, my only special ability was, besides just being the one that brought it all together, was just presentation. People would be like, what the fuck do you do? And I'd be like, well...

I bring the magic i put all the pieces together there's this scene there's this scene in uh in schindler's list where uh lots of jewish people i'm kidding there's a scene in schindler's list where schindler is at the uh he's there and he's convincing this jewish factory owner he's like i i'm gonna buy your factory and we're only gonna hire the jews and you'll you'll you'll all get paid you're gonna get paid this amount which is like less than 10 percent and i'm gonna take 90 and i'm gonna do all that and the at the point is like well what are you gonna do and schindler just is like well i'm gonna be in charge of the presentation and they're like but

this is a horrible deal we can't do this with you and he's like but you can't do this otherwise because you know the nazis don't let jews have jobs i remember being wasted with lemme know i don't know why we were wasted watching schindler's list weird night and i was like bro like that's me i'm schindler i didn't do jack shit i was in charge presentation and i saved all you jews your fights. I could have cooked more, Bacon. I could have cooked more. That was one thing that I never imagined being a manager like that. People who aren't in that position in the business world often wildly underestimate it it's like that same kind of uh like thing you see on social media where they're like oh a ceo makes

that much money all they do is sit on their throne and hand out edicts to their minions and it's like no they don't no they do a fuck ton of work like the people organizing everything making those decisions it's so much more than people think but they have like the king and pauper mentality No, they do a fuck ton of work. The people organizing everything, making those decisions, it's so much more than people think, but they have the king and pauper mentality of like, oh, he just fucks around and does whatever he wants. Not at all. It's true of management at every level.

Everyone who looks above them thinks their manager does nothing and that they're doing all the work. I actually experienced that kind of on this podcast. What podcast like what happened was uh that guy dick masterson was on the one of the last times i was on nice guy i liked that episode that was a good one we had good talks he was having he we brought up the his lawsuit that he was experiencing and then i remember after going and looking into it because i find that stuff fascinating because i experienced that myself you know a couple lawsuits throughout the span of epic mealtime and i went looking and i never saw like although i could see lots of writing about dick side i never got the other side of that scenario and i remember going there was always like reddit comments and everyone's got

opinions and i'm there and i'm just like I need to know the other side of this shit. Like everyone's got an opinion, but you know how they always say there's three sides to every story? Three. My side, your side, and then the truth. Okay. Because it's like, I will see it one way. You'll see it one way. Like I will hear Yanny, you'll hear Laurel.

And we're both right. But the truth is neither of those are the truths both are being said at the same time so there is like always three truths and i find on the internet more than ever is like people want to have that educated decision they want to have that that great theory and they want to act like the theory is true but in reality like a lot of times like unless you have all the facts like you don't know anything but more than ever on the internet people love to act like they do know everything or they have all the answers and i remember after going to that being like damn like i want to get all of

this but i'm only getting one side and i experienced that like when i had a falling out like with this uh the muscles and tyler thing like i couldn't respond to that like now it's like six years later it's like big deal but at the time then like i couldn't be like yo these guys are being fucking they're are they joking they got paid to fucking eat bacon what's everyone mad about you know it was like i had to just to the position i was in i couldn't say anything but people still felt like I had to like... I remember for a year, I put blocked words. I put Jew and kike as blocked words on my videos.

You couldn't comment that because people were killing it. Now I turn that off. Feel free to go on the latest episode of Mealtime and call me a Jew. I'm doing it now. I noticed when you turned it off. I noticed when you turned it off now my weird tirades will be visible for all to see whenever I see that stuff I'm always like

oh man I wonder like I know what's going on like I have buddies who like you know it was actually it was the kind of funny guys like greg miller and stuff and he made a an epic mealtime joke or something and it was all it was him and his buddies and they just started their thing and uh he made a joke i forgot what the joke was but i i couldn't help but like making a comment on like what is probably when you're first starting a business

with like your four friends and you're all like equally established how do you break down the work how do you break down everything how does this company infrastructure structure exist and i couldn't help but like poking fun of that particular scenario except it was just me and all of them at the table and i was like hey and they were all there like like way too true to be funny Like it was way too true. It's like, you know, people, people always like, don't go into business with your friends. I need to say that that's not true. Just make sure you establish your boundaries beforehand. And that's all. Cause working with your friends is awesome. It's like a great time. It's like, cool. It's like, you know, you're working with your friends and I do love those kind of funny guys. They're great. I went to kind of funny three live three, I think, or the fourth one.

But no, I've always been, you know, Greg Miller is the only guy that's ever been on Epic Mealtime. And this says a lot because I've done Epic Mealtime with Kyle, where I went out to and I was like, Greg, you're too drunk. You have to stop. And if the sauce box, if the fucking sauce boss is coming up to you like, bro, I'm sorry, you got to stop drinking your fucking water. Like, you're really, really done. Like, you're really, he had his shirt off. He was Greg Miller. Oh, okay.

Game over, Greggy. And he was just like, yeah, he had his shirt off. He was just so fucked up. Like, if the Epic Mealtime guy on Epic Mealtime is like, bro, this is not the time not the time to get that fucked up you're really fucked up like you're a couple of drinks away from being dead i uh i haven't i have an ama question here there's a attached image if you want to show this gentleman off to the people woody he says uh for kyle how do you take the pussy jokes aside i am 20 years old and a virgin i'm five foot ten clean and confident and a solid 7 on a high-foot day. Yet two decades later, he's 20.

20? 20. Yeah, it's this gentleman's pick in the chat. Yeah. Yeah. I still haven't gotten my dick wet after 20 years. I know it shouldn't be some life-altering circumstance, but it genuinely does kind of wreck me in a way. Is it as simple as lowering my standards?

Should I just become gay? Help me, PKA. You're my only hope. Are you wearing a shirt with a hole in it? Yeah. There's one easily fixed. No, no, no, no. That's like a polo shirt or something.

That's an emblem. Is it an emblem? It could be. I'm torn. I don't emblem. Is it an emblem? I'm torn. I don't know. I think it's some sort of emblem. If that is a hole, I'll say this. A hole on a shirt which we don't think much of or like

dirty fingernails which we might not think of or whatever. Girls see the things that we don't pay attention to. Exactly. It's definitely a dirty, wrinkly shirt. There's no getting past that. If you look by his belly button, you can see this.

And we're seeing his shorts behind the hole. I think you're wearing a torn shirt. And that's an easy fix. And he dressed up for this. How many holes are in your normal shirt here's here's what i'd say here where is he uh we don't know we don't know you're suggesting he's in his parents house aren't you no i meant like what city is he from do you know no no no i don't have that info you see like because you could i could sit here and i could tell people tips and tricks or whatever but then

once they're like uh i live in mexico or something i'm like i am way too removed from the culture to be able to help you like like whereas like here it might be like you know number one like uh you know number one is don't have holes in your shirt and like clip your nails like number one there is just like if you know how to dance like none of that matter i don't know you know what i mean like different cultures they got different things going on but i think when you're 20 and you're like why can't i get laid that's just attracting negative energy you're making it bad for you it's not why can't i get laid it's like you know i'm gonna get laid soon it's just a matter of time and you shouldn't if you make it a mission so hard like why can't I get laid?

Please, internet guys, help me answer this question. It's like you shouldn't even be asking that question because if you ask it, like you're just attracting this – like it's an obstacle that you'll never get past. Just – it's – Women can sense that kind of desperation. Totally. A woman knows when you're going out and you're being all confident, like, oh, man, this guy probably fucks all the time, which means he's been vetted by other women and makes me a little less apprehensive about going home with him. If you go out there and you're seeming desperate, they're going to be like, man, this guy probably hasn't gotten any in a while. Like, he's coming off weird and desperate. I'm not going to be the person to storm this beach.

No, no, I'm going to go to that guy over there. I think it's also important. Like, it's definitely not a badge of shame it's not bad i think it could be like 26 and be a virgin it's totally cool it doesn't matter but i do think a girl might hold it against you and it's best to not reveal that anyways because what's the point you know you can just be like type of guy that doesn't kiss and tell exactly don't don't don't say it I wouldn't I wouldn't say it. I wouldn't bring it up

He looks listen this kid like he looks like a like a clean boy Andy come here for a second Just put that down for a second come here. Why can't this kid get laid? Look at him. I like this perspective Why can't this kid get laid if she notices the shirt guy? That's what I thought what guy. There should be no reason. That's what I thought. What the fuck are you talking about, no reason? I mean, I would... Would you fuck him?

She's like, my standards are low enough, clearly. Yeah, but it's different. But he has clean fingernails. He does his hair. Yeah. He's got an iPhone. Maybe his screen is off. His screen is checked.

Let's get him laid, guys. Let's get him laid, boys. Yeah, get out of here. He's got a broken screen on the internet. Damn. Did she suggest that maybe he had a broken screen? She's like, well, he's got clean fingernails. That's all it takes.

I think that... I'm going to go to Harley's house with flip-flops and a pedicure. Show her what's up. I think he's mentally blocked here. I bet you're kind of in a self-fulfilling prophecy, like a feedback loop, where you're going out, not at all confident,

looking at the ground, shoulders slunched over, not a very assertive posture, and then you're oh this didn't work now i feel worse now i'm going to be less confident and i'll go back next weekend and look the same thing just realize that it doesn't fucking matter you're gonna get laid yeah go in there and just pretend you're some dude who fucks all the time and talk to the girls like you're that guy that sounds where is there where is he going out and where is there? Because I think it's equally possible unless I miss something

in the AMA that he's not putting himself in situations where he can find girls. Right? Like I'm not getting laid and I've been to all my engineering courses

and I'm doing great in my programming course and there's just no girls there. Like are you on Tinder? You know? Are you putting yourself in a spot where you'll meet new women?

Yeah. One, you're not overweight at all. Two, you're a good-looking guy. You're going to be fine. Get Tinder. You're going to be all right. Tinder is shooting fish in a barrel. Yeah.

And just don't put that picture of you with a holy shirt on your profile. We're looking at this guy. We're like, I don't get it, man. He's all good. And then, you know, it's like, you should be able to kill it. And if we heard him and he's mad, he's like, thanks, guys. He's got one of those voice box things. Thank you. I will do my best in the future. No, there's girls down with that 100%.

What if he's got no feet or something? I can't tell he's on he's on plate legs yeah those things that runners they couldn't escape like

is he king of the hills father what we don't see is at the bottom of the picture yeah he's wearing like Heelys like those shoes

with wheels on them and every time he sees girls he's like just rolling up to them like screw it

the mom he's like wet up I would like to see like a Healy challenge, right? Like some really hot guy. Like, do you know who Connor Murphy is on YouTube? He's a fitness model and he's a perfect 10. And every so often he like hits on girls and stuff and succeeds with lines that would never

work for regular people. And, uh, yeah, yeah. This guy, I yeah this guy i know this guy i've seen this okay anyway where he goes up to girls he goes up to girls and he's like what's up and they're like hi and then he takes his shirt off and they're like hi he's got a dozen videos along those lines like you know he literally goes up to girls like girls and he pulls his shirt off and they're like can we suck your dick on your video he's he's like he's a 10 and uh anyway i'd love to see him like pick up girls in heelys just roll up with his

shirt off and see if they talk to him i think i'll have you know like a couple years back like an ex-girlfriend of mine was at the mall and she was walking and she was like this sweaty dude rolled up to me in heelys and he was like hey And she looked and she was like Toby Turner She's like you know me. I went to your party. She's like I did hardly and he was like oh shit, and he he lead away Center he like rolled up in Heelys. He was like, hey. She was like, hey. Oh, Toby. She was like, hey.

She was like, I dated Harley. And he was just like, zoop. And Heelyed away, just like that. Really crazy. Wow. So when Harley dates a girl, no one wants her afterwards. You ruined her. Yeah, I don't know if this was just a during or if it was right after.

But yeah. Well, it's funny you mentioned Toby Turner. Don't you have a video about Toby? Didn't he have a Me Too thing, Chiz? Yeah, real recent, right? Didn't someone, like, accuse him of sexual assault or something like that? That was years ago. Is he Tobuscus?

Is he the same person? Yeah, he is. Tobuscus, he was accused of, like, a year ago or a year and a half ago uh literally like right at like he was almost like the pre-catalyst for the me too movement in a video and i'm in a like a thing and then that whole movement started like shortly after him and then uh he he couldn't say anything on the matter and couldn't do anything he got like his shit taken out of toys r us there was videos going around of him being uh drunk there's like live streams of him like being weird with like shira lazar and philip defranco shared a particular story about him

um and then after all that yeah he just put out a video uh last week being like yo it's been a year and uh i i didn't go to jail and i didn't do anything wrong. And that's how it is. And that's my story. And, you know, yeah, exactly. He calls her the B word at the end there and saying all that stuff. And then he's like new videos every Tuesday and Thursday. You can say bitch here if you want. I didn't want to say it there because I didn't want to refer to her as a bitch because I know that girl personally as well. And these are always – this is what I learned in L.A., okay?

This is when I was in L.A. Is that like people – I can meet people at a Toby Turner party, let's say, and they can all be there. And they're all at that party together, and I'll meet them all, and I'll be Facebook friends with all of them. and they're all at that party together, and I'll meet them all, and I'll be Facebook friends with all of them, and then later down the line, I'll be like,

hey, we're all going to the movie, and I'll invite in person A, B, and C from the Toby party that I met there, and person A is like, oh, person C is coming. Person B doesn't get along with them at all, and person C will be like, oh, I fucking hate the person. I don't like going there,

and the way I refer to it in here like in canada is you don't mix your hollywoods and anyone that is in hollywood if you're friends with one it does not mean you can casually just go and mix your other friend and be like hey i'm friends with both of you so let's just all hang out because it's a really small town and people have really like, it sounds like high school for adults. It's literally like that. It's like high school drama, but like in the town and it's a small town and people have history and people have things.

And like, I'm one of those people that tries to be cool with everyone. So I end up being cool with people that are like arch nemeses to one another. And I'll like hit them both up. Like, yo, you want to do the star Wars VR thing? And I'm like, like yeah and then they get there and they're like what's that doing here they ruined my life but like so i didn't say in that particular scenario because i know that

girl you know but i also knew toby he was very nice to me so i'm like juggling my my experience with those people and like i'll watch the video i'll be like okay that's toby's video it is what it is you know and then at the end when he's like don't trust the lying bitch i'm like oh i'm like i know that girl i also don't want to call her that and i don't want to say that he's just you know i don't just don't want to touch it it's a scenario i'm like i just don't want to touch it that guy was always nice to me and i don't know and that girl was always nice to me and you know nothing ever would show me that she would be dishonest. So this is like a messy scenario.

I got no business touching and even talking about it right now as much as I am after you said that we could say bitch on this show. I feel like I'm talking about it too much. It's a very touchy and intense scenario. You know, you know, like I've met Chris Hardwick multiple times. I met Chloe Dykstra multiple times. They're going through a thing right now. Who is Chloe Dykstra? Sky Dart. She's the girl. She just put out

the essay about her relationship with Chris Hardwick. Chris was never anything but extremely nice to me and always gave me time a day. He's had me on his show multiple times. He came on my show and it was time consuming even though he had a lot of shit going on and i met her and she was like just like one of the nicest coolest people i ever met in my life so like you meet both these people i know both these people and then this shit hits the

fan and i'm like damn and people are like where do you stand and i'm like i stand over here and i don't know sometimes when you retell a story by the way because sorry to interrupt real quick but sometimes saying i don't know is taking a stand to some people and i want to say like i don't know to the i don't know like you know not having an opinion on it is is something bad to people you know and i just anyways i already feel like i spoke too much about this shit because it's a very touchy subject and I don't know how to approach it. And I feel like I'm not the best to talk about it. You know what I mean?

Sorry I interrupted you there. It's all good. I was going to say on the Toby thing, like I heard the things that came out about him from the get-go. One, you don't know what's true. And two, sometimes when they tell a story, even if it is true, it can sound worse than it was meant to be. Like, oh, we were kissing and then he stuck his hand up my shirt and dissed. Yeah. That was always my move to see if it was okay to stick my hand up her shirt.

You know? But you take out a context and tell the story as if I'm some sort of predator and suddenly I'm a creep. That can be how that happened. You know? I was doing this and then he wanted that. Yeah. That's kind of how that goes, right? You just keep pushing until they say no i don't know is that creepy what i noticed what i noticed in all this was like you know the harvey the harvey weinstein thing happened and i was like damn he was doing that to people he was like cornering them in his hotel room big dude like naked like you know uh dick out, like, jizzing in a plant or whatever

the exact story was. I'm like, that's fucked up. And it's like, Bill Cosby, like, drugging dozens and dozens of girls over the decades. Bill Cosby seems like he's the worst of this whole group. Well, that's what I'm saying. Harvey Weinstein, that's very bad. Like, Bill Cosby legit drugging people, that's really bad.

Kevin Spacey, I'm gonna get shit for even saying this stuff, but, like, Kevin like that's like you know a pedophile you know like like his story was like a like pedophile story and that's fucked up but then you take the the that same bucket and then you say like aziz ansari had a really fucked up night with this girl and then you take aziz ansari and you put him in that same bucket You know the abusive rapist And like it was just the way that they told it or that woman told it like at the end of day It was like wait, so you're telling me Aziz tried to hit on you and then you blew it all All it's not quite the same as like Kevin Spacey with a little way drunk at some after-party

Alone in the room, you know, or it's not the same as like physically bullying someone with your dick out they're different than that where his advances were there were too many there's there's like i want to say there's a spectrum here to an extent but like ultimately like it's crazy because we put them all in the same bucket these days and so no matter what like you know if you're, you're a rapist or you had pedophile accusations or you're, uh, you just had a terrible date, uh, or you, you know, someone felt like you, like, it's all in the same bucket and it's, it's pretty, it's pretty, uh. Have you ever been on it? Like, like to, like, I totally agree with you putting all those people in the same

bucket actually lessens the impact of actual like victims of like rape you know because they're like uh are you talking about like you know kevin spacey stuff or are you talking about like aziz and sorry had a bad date or are you talking about louis ck who literally he did nothing wrong he's he has a uh a kind of pathetic fetish where he wants women to watch a masturbate he asked all of them he't do anything. It's just kind of pathetic, but he gets lumped into that same Harvey Weinstein genuine creep bucket. There's a little creep about Louis C.K.

I think to say he did nothing wrong, because there's a power imbalance there, right? If he asked them, though, and they said, yes, you can masturbate in front of us, what's the problem there? Did they say yes? Yeah. He only did it in front of people who said yes.

That was why when I actually read the story, I was like, this isn't what I'm going to do. The challenge is the power imbalance. I think that's the part that people are leaving out. I don't like the power imbalance argument. And this isn't Louis C.K. right now. Because at some point, anyone who has any power over someone, whether it's me with some subscribers or Harley with some subscribers, now all of a sudden we're the aggressor or the predator in every sexual encounter we ever have.

There was a power imbalance there. You're Harley Morinstein. You're Kyle Myers. You can't do that. I can't date. I can't hit on a girl, ever. Even at the time, executive producer, these are aspiring comics he's doing in front of in some cases.

The juice we fucked wanted to be on YouTube. So when a big name comic or an executive producer goes through and you know he's trying to masturbate in front of aspiring comics you know i i can't say he did nothing wrong you know is there any kind of responsibility on the person to go no no, I'm leaving. I'm not coming up to your hotel room at 3 a.m.? I think instantly – well, that's a thing right there. There's a thing right there where it's like – I think that there's rightfully a double standard in the sense that as soon as a man who's bigger than you, if you're a girl, is like, can I jerk off in front of you and you're in his hotel room it's kind of like shit i'm this seemed cool and all but now it feels like i like there's a weird pressure aspect there i know it sounds like a like a like a a myth to an extent or it doesn't exist but like maybe we're just confident people where it's like yo if someone's like i jerk off i'd be like hell no brother but if you go and look at like some of these YouTube videos, like the pranks that were like before the girls were paid and it was like, you know, those semi weird abusive ones where it was like kissing strangers.

Like some of them, you just see these girls like the social pressure in the camera and the like weird like pressuring aspect. And it's this decision. And it's like you don't say no you just like get weird and have like defense mechanisms come up and you just kind of like remove yourself and now you're watching a guy jerk off and you didn't this isn't really what you wanted you didn't really agree to this it's just you got pressured you got cornered it's kind of like it's it's it's crazy said that they weren't cornering him or that he wasn't cornering her like a couple of them were talking about how they laughed

and then left while he was in the middle of doing it like probably came on his belly and like oh what a fucking fat loser and then they left like it the whole like my only point was like lumping him in with genuine you know molesters rapists is pretty fucked up yes i i think that there has to be like some classifications of it you know there's a big difference between like abusive boyfriend and uh you know like uh like uh a pedophile but it doesn't mean that like you know an abusive boyfriend doesn't you know can't be extremely abusive to a point where it's like you know a crime you know like where it's an issue everyone agrees taylor that there's levels to this game right that you've got bill cosby and weinstein who are you know the king of the the pack with regards to this sexual assault business and then

at the very bottom you have aziz anzari who i think literally did nothing wrong right yeah totally but you get to louis ck who was like well you know i like to find people who are aspiring comics you know who know that i'm executive producer in a big shit comic and and you know maybe use my position to get myself laid and it's like that's a lot like you know me being a manager yeah you're filling in the blanks i didn't make a shit up like this is true they're aspiring no you did you you were like what did i make up name one thing i got wrong you're describing in his shoes and you and you prescribe the motive i did what you put you put yourself in his shoes like saw it from his point

of view and then prescribed a motive you were like i like to find chicks who are aspiring comics we don't know that like he ever had that thought in his head. Maybe he was just like, well, there's a hot chick here. I'll ask her. I bet he was asking every attractive woman he was ever associated with if they wanted to see him jerk off. The fact that they may or may not have been comics was just incidental. I'm sure there's plenty of chicks who weren't comics and who weren't looking to get on his TV show or whatever. And he was like, hey, you want to see me jerk it?

Anyone? Does anyone want to see me jerk it anyone does anyone want to see me jerk it you know like that's the way i see it i see your position and i and i understand that like if that was the case that does make things worse if he is like predatorily looking for aspiring female comics and be like oh she's ripe for the pick that's what weinstein did my show. Weinstein would find people who they weren't loving him because he was Weinstein. They were loving him because they were aspiring actresses. In some cases, he really did come through with jobs

for them. Oh, he's a kingmaker. Yeah, he's a kingmaker. A lot of them didn't come back and accuse Weinstein until after 25-year careers. Until they'd been made queens. Queenmaker, I guess, in this circumstance. Chicks like Angelina Jolie or who's the blonde who was with

Brad Pitt for a while? Oh, Jennifer Aniston. Not Jennifer Aniston. The actual blonde who was... In any case, I think she was in... It doesn't matter. They waited until their careers had been made by Harvey Weinstein to ever come out and say a thing.

That's not brave. That's the definition of cowardice. Like, it's ridiculous what they did. And they did that while knowing that he was going to continue to prey upon other women. They took the money but i i i feel like it's it's like uh it's we might be underestimating the amount of power or fear you might have or regret or anything i've never been victimized like that before or anything like that but i can tell you that like one time i got slipped uh like a drug in my drink. I know I got drugged because I had one drink and I got extremely sick. And like,

I was just like so fucked up and like, luckily a friend came and helped me out and like basically saved me. Cause I was like passed out, like on the street, like outside after one drink. And like that next day, like it's such an interesting feeling to me because I've never, ever felt it before.

And I was like, didn't know how I felt for the longest time until like, like in the longest time, like I thought about it all day, like that night, the next day I was like, oh, I feel victimized. I'm a victim. And it was so hard to grasp it. I couldn't grasp it. I was like, I was like, man, I can't go out without my friends. That was stupid of me. And I was like, I can't like, you know, I can't go,

I shouldn't be partying so much. And I gotta be careful. And like, I shouldn't this and I shouldn't that. And I was doing the whole thing. And I was like, why? Like, you know, when I was talking and then later I was just like, yo, someone shouldn't put fucking drugs in my drink. But for that whole time, I was like, I shouldn't even be partying. I shouldn't even fucking drugs in my drink but for that whole time i was like i shouldn't even be partying i shouldn't even this and it's minuscule so many you also weren't engaging in like a quid pro quo kind of thing where it was like you know this guy just fucked with you just needlessly like just threw something in there you had no control it wasn't like what i was describing where it was like hey if you blow me you're're going to get some movie parts. And who knows? Maybe a whole career.

Yeah. I mean, like, it's the thing is, like, there's, like, think about the people where their career didn't happen and they did it. Like, you know what I mean? Or something like that. Or they did it and it wasn't, like, I don't know. It's tough to say. Dave Chappelle touches on it in a really interesting way. I don't know if you guys saw that bit. Where he's like, Harvey Weinstein's not a good looking man at all. He's got so much

extra skin on his face. He's like, if Harvey Weinstein looked like Brad Pitt, all these people would be like, I got the part. I like what he said about Louis C.K. He was like, this girl came forward and said, I had a dream. And he destroyed it. He's like, you know, this girl came forward and said like, I had a dream and he destroyed it.

He's like, really? You saw him jerk his dick and that destroyed your dream? What if Martin Luther King's dream had been that fragile? It was like because he was jerking off on the phone and it killed his dream. He was like, you should have hung up the phone. He talks about Oh shit, you broke up.

Yeah. I'm not sure if it's your mic or your internet. Yeah, you're good now. Yeah, I was saying like he he's up there like Tap your mic, Harley. Is my mic fucked up again? I think you might have switched mics. Tap it. Hello?

Yeah, there's no tapping sound. I not sure it might have gotten disconnected hello i mean i can hear you but it you sound like garbage harley you might be on your webcams mic at this point if if you could try and reselect it make sure the cables are connected hello there you There you go. That's great. Is that better? Yeah. I've got to get a new wire for this thing. Dave Chappelle is hilarious.

Who was the rapper that got shot dead this week? Extension, maybe? It has a name that's hard to read. I think I pronounced it XXXTentacion. Oh, I like that. That is the correct way. Well, XXXTentacion was murdered this week.

Yeah, shot dead in his car. And everyone acted like one of the Beatles had been killed, right? So all those people riding in L.A. and stuff? Everyone acted like it was Biggie or Tupac, someone influential on an entire culture, when really it was a rapper we'd never heard of who hung up white guy. I was very familiar.

Do you guys never heard that song where he's like, fuck on me, fuck on me? If you played it, maybe you'd be like, oh, I know this. I think I may have heard it. And Kyle, we have heard of him because there was a time

when someone walked up on stage and knocked him the fuck out and PKI did a reaction to it. Oh, that's hilarious. Good. Well, I'm glad that they knocked him out for good this time because he was a real piece of shit. He was. What did he do? Well, he was abusive toward his girlfriend.

I'm sure Woody has the images of her with double black eyes. And didn't he hang a white boy in one of his music videos? His girlfriend at the time was pregnant that he apparently uh physically abused yeah beat the shit out of her i listen i'm a very i guess i'm a very forgiving guy i i've never i've never gone and been like oh yeah that person deserves to be dead or anything like that but like he was not a good person but let's be honest also like i don't want to be like hey kids you know you got to forgive their mistakes but like he was not a good person but let's be honest also like i don't want to be like hey kids you know you got to forgive their mistakes but like 20 years old to me he is basically a kid

when he abused that girl it was a couple years younger this is a guy that like maybe had mental issues mental issues and was young and like you know grew up in a bad bad area you know um what's so fucked up is I'm not a fan of the person at all. I'm not a fan of his music really. One song maybe a little bit but I was not a fan of him. I was not tweeting rest in peace when he passed. I was not applauding it either

but what was crazy to me was I went on Facebook and I saw this post and it said posted 15 minutes ago. And it was like, you know, Facebook, uncover the video. You click uncover video to see it. And I clicked it and it was a dude face like a Snapchat. And he was like, yo, I'm at this right outside.

It was jewelry store or something. And he was like, and he's like, XX just got shot. He's in his Lambo. And then he turns the camera and walks up to the car and I was like, I didn't expect to really see this and like you see him in his car in the Lambo

like the look on his face the way his hands were everything, I looked at it and I was like, yo this guy's dead this guy's dead if he's not dead he's dying like it was a video and there were people there everyone's there with their phones like and it's gonna get so many retweets it's like yo that's a phone dog that calls emergency services

first it's it's a phone before it's anything else and this this is the moment where, like, this is your chance, G. Who calls anymore? Can't you text emergency services? It was just so crazy. I'm all out of minutes. Emergency services, like, rude. You got to text first. 35 minutes later, I got people, like, being like, rest in peace, rest in peace. I was like, yo, I just saw, like, it's fucked up.

I was like, yo, this is the future in a fucked up way. I just saw this guy die. It wasn't like Tupac where you're seeing a car with holes in it and you're like, whoa, that's how it happened. It's like I was watching this guy 15 minutes after it occurred

right there on the spot. Dude, someone, they were zooming into the entry wound like online like they're zooming they're walking up with their cameras this guy in the front seat of his lambo it was just so surreal to see and i saw that and i was like damn and maybe you know what maybe if i hadn't seen that i would be more on the side of like well that guy was a fucking woman abuser he abused a pregnant woman and, he was an abusive troublemaker. And I may have been more on that side, but I guess maybe seeing it firsthand,

I was just like, yo, this was like a person like the look on his face and his hands. It was like one of those moments where you're like, this is like, it's not like movies. This is what we do when we're at that point in life where it's the end. And it was just really fucked up.

And, uh, yeah. And then I see people being like, yo, XXXX, and listen, rest in peace to him, and I feel bad for the family and close friends, but when I see, like, tons of people on Facebook being like, yo, XXX, and it's like, okay,

and then they follow it up by, you know, being like, something like Aziz Ansari, bashing Aziz Ansari but then they'll like give love to this rapper because he died but he abused his girlfriend or to anyone who's ever been like you know like oh you know and I'm not

standing up for one side or another I just think it's fucked up if you're like fuck Louis CK for what he did but you also have Chris Brown songs on your iPhone I think it's fucked up if you pick and choose depending on what the zeitgeist is and which one is which at which point in time you know what i mean and i think i think everyone deserves to with every little thing everyone needs to stop and think a lot more about every single thing you know there's so much thinking

to be done you know what i mean anyway it's fucked up 20 years old 20 years old i saw him like i saw him die on facebook like that's so crazy yeah it's the future the future is now that shit is crazy like stuff that like in real time is fucked up that you're seeing on facebook like remember that kidnapping uh where they kidnap kids yeah where the mentally challenged person yeah uh so crazy yeah they kidnapped that mentally challenged white kid and we're like actually torturing him and it's like on facebook live not like they uploaded it they're like it's live right now and it was like the police have to be showing up soon right like you can call facebook or trace it or something and they're like dunking his head in

there hitting the top of his head with items like causing his skull to you know or you know his scalp rather to fracture it's like oh that other guy also yeah that that dude that walked up and he was like blamed his ex-girlfriend he was like this is her fault and then he walked up to some old man oh this one killed me because the old man it's like he's walking with his groceries and he was like 70 years old and the guys in his car like yo my ex-girlfriend made me do this and he walks out and he goes up to do and he's like yo and the old man stops and like looks at him i guess like you know fancies the guy maybe a younger version of himself he stops and he's like yes like wants to know and the guy pulls out the gun and

like shoots him that was one of those videos where i was like oh my god i wish i didn't see this i wish this didn't exist like this guy was so like he's like 72 years old shouldn't be buying fucking groceries but he's still like an operating man like he's like lived this far just to have this fucking guy kill him on facebook like so for no reason that had nothing to do with him it was he was like my girlfriend made me do this he was like rachel this is because of what you did you think rachel's out there like damn i shouldn't have done that she's like you were insane i'm glad i did that bullet she's yeah right for me so that's all he did the guy i haven't i haven't even heard about this story the guy just he walked up to this old man and shot it i recommend not

even watching the video executed this 72 year old man on the sidewalk while recording with his phone and the guy was innocent as fuck and he just guns him down and you see the blood and you see him later dead and then you see other videos like after he's fled the scene of people you know showing the aftermath and he's just on the sidewalk with a puddle of blood did they catch him yeah oh he killed himself i think like later that day the next day good i hope he's i wish hell were real so he could be there yo that see that for me is is that is different you you're a guy like that and you like you go out there and you're like, yo, my girl made me... and you kill that man. I understand

maybe there's other things at play here, but the way I see it is a broken human being, we don't need it. We don't need that one. That one is for me... I can, like I said, I don't want to wish death upon someone, but in this particular scenario it had struck such a chord with me that I was like

that's a human we don't need. It's broken. It's a broken one. It's bad. We don't need that one. My standards are so much lower for humans we don't need. There's tons of them. And pretty much all rapists. Violent rapists, especially. Blood and soil, am I right?

I don't even know what that means. You're always saying it. You have a tattoo that says it.'s a nazi thing right i don't even know is that a nazi thing it is that i i never heard of it before that charleston thing remember like trump didn't condemn the nazis or something they were chanting blood and soil which i don't know if it's a nazi thing or a white supremacist thing and i still don't get it like can you explain blood and soil I don't know if it's a Nazi thing or a white supremacist thing And I still don't get it Kyle can you explain blood and soil Because I bet you can

You're from Georgia Rebel flag Sort of thing in front of non-Georgians It dates back to real Nazis I really don't even know what it means There are still real Nazis all over Twitter Real ones We don't talk to cheese they hate it so cory lewandowski was on uh cnn i think and uh had a real shit show

earlier i think this is fucking hilarious they're bringing up i guess uh a mexican uh illegal child who had down syndrome and was separated from its mother. And Corey Lewandowski's reaction is hilarious. It's mother. Yeah, it's mother. Blood and soil. I'm cute at zero here.

This Wikipedia article? No, the fucking Oh, the top. So we're watching this Fox News thing? Yeah, we're watching the Fox News thing. Sorry, I think I missed the last 40 seconds. So scroll up a little bit, find that link

that Kyle sent, and I think we're going to listen to Corey Lindowski be a total cunt. No, you've got to listen to him being a rational person and one hell of a troll. I haven't seen this, and hopefully it's funny. Are you guys ready? Yep.

Is Harley? Are we watching the whole thing? No, you'll know when to stop. Okay. All right. Three, two, one, play. I read today about a 10-year-old girl with Down syndrome who was taken from her mother and put in a cage.

I read about a... Did you say want-want to a 10-year-old with Down syndrome being taken from her mother and put in a cage I read about a they're just a want want to a ten-year-old with down syndrome how dare you how dare you how absolutely dare you sir how dare you we have infants that are being taken from their mothers we have infants that are being stolen from their mothers and sent to cages Oh, wow. I think we got it there. How absolutely dare you? He gives two fake desk bangs. He didn't even hit the desk. Womp, womp. Womp, womp. Look, first of all,

she shouldn't be... When someone robs a liquor store, they take their infants away from them too, whether they have Down syndrome or not. They take their 10-year-olds away from them where they have Down syndrome or not. When you break the law, expect to be separated from your children who you broke the law with. Just because you brought them along for your crime doesn't mean that you get to bring them to your cell. They go in their own tiny baby cell, and that's how that shit works. Except for today because Trump signed an executive thing to stop.

They're going to keep them together. Second of all, we don't want Down syndrome Mexicans here anyway. They're going to bruise the fucking oranges when they pick them. They're going to be wiping shit all over your cabbage. That's how you get those E. coli outbreaks in our lettuce and stuff. These are facts. I got to tell you. and stuff these are facts i read i i gotta tell you so i uh jewish people who have been in cages before in their life you know we spoke about it like somehow eight times on this on this podcast

they have this whole uh thing the whole thing related with the holocaust is uh never again and that's the whole movement attached to it to jewish people and it's like if you go to israel in the holocaust museum for two weeks worth of time all it is is a recording and it takes two weeks to play one time through is just saying the names of everyone that was killed in the holocaust you know and it's over like you know a thousand hours of just saying their names the whole movement of the Holocaust is never again and the way the Holocaust started was Germany went to Jewish people and they said we will pay your ticket if you get the fuck out of Germany so it started there and if people were like whoa could you believe they're paying for our tickets trying to get us out of here? These fucking assholes.

People would be there and be like, you idiots. They're giving you an opportunity. We don't want you here. That's one step. So I'm not saying that this. Comparing this to the Holocaust is ridiculous. This is about people breaking into a country, not trying to get out. I know.

I'm just trying to explain something here. When you start by putting people in cages, that is not a concentration camp. It is not Auschwitz. It's not gassing them. They're not forced labor, okay? But the thing for me that I would compare it to is that it's a step. It's a step, and it's not a step towards gassing people in cages. It's a step where I would say it's closer to a concentration camp than a summer camp and you could call it what you want but the only reason

why jewish people are so obsessed with never again is because jewish people think that on the holocaust the human race made a huge error in letting that happen. And when we say never again, the whole point is to call it out early and call it out before it ever gets that point. And I just want to say this, I'm not American, but I'm not the type of person that would allow kids to be put in cages

separated from their family. And now another thing is, I don't know that it was policy beforehand or ever i just know whose responsibility it is to take care of it now and the people of the world now should never look at a kid in a cage or a mentally challenged kid in a cage and be like womp womp i think that's fucked up and i'm not saying it's the holocaust but i'm just saying my history that was burned into my mind was like you remember that time when they were like, get out of Germany? And we were like, nah.

And then they were like, yo, put your name on this paper. And everyone was like, nah. And then they were like, put a yellow band on your arm. And they were like, nah. And then they said, you can't have your own business. And then they went and they burnt down your house. And then they took you out of your house. Then they put you in a ghetto.

Then they put you on a train. And then you went to the to the camp like it's a process and i'm not saying that that's where this would go but it's in a step where i would be like i don't want to be a part of that i don't want to be like pro kids in cages i would just be like that's fucked up to me and i don't i don't think anybody is pro kidskids in cages. Nobody likes to see that. There's definitely people pro-kids in cages. This guy's going womp womp. You break the law. You break the law. You shouldn't have broke the law. That's the policy. They knew it.

Even then, there's a difference between like, I don't think most of these... Yeah, he responded like a callous cunt. Agreed. Yeah, I don't like that. It was funny because it was so unexpected. It was shocking. It's an elected representative of the United States of America. Is he?

No, he's not elected. I saw the... I think nobody is looking at the actual kids in the cage and being like, yeah, I love seeing kids in cages. It's like, this is a sad and somewhat kind of necessary

in some ways things because we don't know if these kids that are coming across are actually the sons or daughters of those people there are many reports of kids go coming through multiple times bringing more adults with them they're involved in child trafficking they're involved in all sorts of crimes and so to try and frame it all as, oh, this is kids in cages, and that's where all the analysis ends. It's like, well, no, you don't have to like this, but you can notice it as like, okay, well, we got to iron this stuff out. The reason in the first place that they're keeping them separate is because they used to keep them all together. In 2014, a private institution sued the Obama administration and said, you can no longer keep them together like that. That's illegal to have a child in a holding facility like that. You have

to keep them separate. And so now it's flipping the other direction where they're going, now you have to keep them together again, which is why Trump issued that executive order. But I think there's way too much extrapolating from this. I don't think, you know, there are some sickos out there maybe, but I don't think that there are people looking at the actual act of kids in cages going, that right there?

That's great. That's wonderful. I hope more kids try to cross illegally so that we can put them in cages to woohoo Like I that's just I'm not seeing that anywhere. I'm seeing people discussing how to handle this really big problem Well, I think that guy just won't want a mentally challenged girl being by herself. Yeah, what do you think? Where where do you think she is? Like where you think that girl is? You know what I mean? She doesn't even know. But, like, see,

that guy, I even said two minutes ago, that guy was really, really callous and shitty, and I was surprised at how shitty he was. But would you be shocked to know that there's lots of callous and shitty people out there? Here's what I'll say. Here's what I'll say. Go in so hard on one side or the other

because I know everyone, like I said, the three truths, I know when this is all over here, it might be because they don't want my attention somewhere else. And I know that. It's always, it's a game of propaganda in one way or another, and we're always being

served in one way or another, and I know that. It's easy for it's easy for me to see her and be like, I would never put kids in cages. I don't even have the solution for it. I don't have the best way to approach it. I don't want to act. I just feel bad. Cause like when, when once again, I'll bring it back. This is what Jews do. They always be like in the Holocaust, in the Holocaust, but in the Holocaust, there was like a camp that was like less than a mile away from a full town of Germans. And like the Americans took those German people and marched them through the camp after. And they were like, how'd you let all this shit happen? And they were like, what should we have done?

We were following orders. We listened to, you know, the Nazis were in the country. What could we do? And I felt like I used to look at them and be you stupid bitch they're gassing them but now that i'm here and kids are in cages there i looked at it like today before you know trump vowed to make the change i was like what could i even do other than get on facebook right now and be like like what could i even do and now i know if they had all right if they had the mexican kids down the road from you right now and they were gassing them and every day you saw the ash clouds coming up you'd probably do

something i would i would literally do a thing like like i wouldn't stand for that like like if we're gonna have to break the law because we're not gonna allow them to keep burning those mexican kids over there that they're gassing every day we're going to do something about this like like these are the whoever these people are whether the government or the police or their or whoever they are the bad guys morally however you want to look at it they're evil but they're not doing that these kids are breaking into our country with their parents perhaps being smuggled in as sex slaves we don't know it's easy to frame it as like – You can't go from zero to gas chamber though.

Yeah. I felt like we've been the bad guys lately, right? Would we withdraw from the UN humanitarian counselor, whatever the heck that was? We've been pulling out from the Paris climate accord. We've been putting Mexican children in cages. Yeah, I think it was a good idea. And I'm like, man, it just seems like we're on the wrong side of every issue lately.

I disagree. You know what's weird? What are we supposed to do to protect our border? Go ahead, Harley. Well, I was going to say, I went on, I remember being on not the last time, but the time before, maybe the time before. I was with you guys. You guys spoke about Trump. And I was like, whoa, I never found myself in a conversation with people that were like yo trump and i i was like oh i'll look into it more because i don't know shit

and then like what i did was you know probably not the best place to start like i subscribed to the donald to just see what people say and what they think and like you know what the comments are there and there were many times in the last 12 months where i was like damn they're right about that though they're right about that they're right about that though they're right about that they're right about that and then i'll see something i'm like oh they're very wrong about that they're very and like it's what i what i find and i saw this once again i saw this i saw this nazi video today that was like on reddit where it was uh an american propaganda post-war type thing called don't be a sucker and it was was talking about like how Nazis rised in Germany.

And when I saw that, what they say is the whole thing was divide and conquer. And I don't think I've ever seen the USA more divided than right now where it's like, where it's like women, you men don't understand the struggle. And then, you know,

trans women are like, you women don't understand the struggle and then you know trans women are like you women don't understand the struggle and black trans women are like you white women trans women don't understand and black people and white people and immigrants and everyone and it feels like everyone is so split it's like people watch star wars and they're like what is this left propaganda shit and it's like yo when did star wars even become a fucking political like everything everywhere is just everything is about being divided and you that's the only way that you can make a change just by breaking up into every little tiny tiny pieces and i look at like i've never felt like america was more like dissected in my lifetime than it is right now where i'm just like damn like

everyone is on a side you know what i mean like there's a side to everything and it's like when you said it just now you're like i feel like we're all like you know on the wrong side here it's because it's so strange to pick sides and stand by their side and when you have that you know it's like there's a pride attack it's just it's heavy's a lot of heavy shit lately, and I feel like there's so many crazy – like fucking Trump face-to-face with Kim Jong-un. These are fucking monumental moments. I'll tell you something. Trump going to meet Kim Jong-un made me think two things that I thought were kind of potentially positives about Trump

because I know a lot of people have a lot of negative things to say about him. When Trump went to go meet Kim Jong, I was like, yo, Kim Jong runs that country. He could turn around in that meeting and be like, yo, dismantle that shit in a meeting in a second. I was i'm kind of comfortable with donald trump being there because kim jong is practically the ceo of north korea he can make a unilateral decision and this is so close to a deal with a company that i'm not against trump doing it and trump could probably butter him up more than anyone else and then i thought even further do you remember that kid that got abducted by north korea because he tried to steal a sign and then they sent him back here i think yeah i really truly believe that if trump was in office and that happened he would have got on a plane and been like hell no hell no and he would have

flown there and literally got that kid back himself with his bare hands. And I think about that. And when like I'm not pro-Trump, I'm not anti-Trump. The American people selected this man. That's their choice. That's what they get. And I sure as hell won't complain and bitch about it. And when I see people complain and when I see people on Facebook like I wish donald trump was dead i'm like you're a fucking idiot like that's the president he was selected to be that like why would you wish death

on someone remember when kathy griffin held up the head of donald trump i was like you're a fucking idiot and she's like i'm blacklisted i'm like well you should be you wish death on a man also the president you know like it's just it's it's everything's so touchy everything's so heavy everything's so crazy but like when i saw the Kim Jong thing, I was like, wow, you know what? Trump, that's probably a good guy to have in that particular scenario. And then I see pictures of kids in cages and I'm like, why can't I just be happy with one particular side for one whole fucking day? It's like a day goes and it's like, there's every side, every side there up things you know you ever got you guys ever read trans metropolitan no no i don't even know

what that is it's this graphic novel about this excellent journalist and he's talking about like basically the two presidential candidates and he's trying to write on both of them and one is just like an intense like scowling warmongering like sicko and the other one is just like an intense, like scowling, warmongering, like sicko. And the other one is like, like no life, no soul behind his eyes, like with the fakest, biggest smile you've ever seen. But they're each a devil in their own right. And like, that's like, that's like where we're, where we're left at these days. You know, like that's where it's at. Like there's always an agenda. Every single network has an agenda and everyone has like, like you can watch fox and it's one side or you can go turn on

like the young turks if you want it it's another side everyone is it's always and and and this whole this whole video that i watched once again nazi shut up you do about the nazi this nazi video from earlier today was like just brought up all of that. And it's so weird because it's like fucking almost 100 years ago. But like if you look at it, they're breaking it down exactly how it's occurring right now where people just get segmented and the country loses its power when the people aren't together and united. Well, and it's also like to your point of dividing everyone, every narrative, no matter what side, seems to push the kind of feeling of like, oh, no, no, no. They don't disagree with you on, you know, incarcerating children at the border or taxes or net neutrality or anything. They don't disagree because they have a different point of view. They disagree because they're evil.

They're evil. They're evil. And they know they're evil. And so all that righteous indignation you feel, yeah, you're right right to feel it and you don't have to hold back when you're going up against them because what are they they're evil like not both sides aren't thinking they're misinformed and maybe a little dumb sometimes they you like you get it in your head like they're they're evil they're coming for me they're intentionally being malicious and that's the way they're kind of fostering this discourse and And so, of course, it's going to get super, super aggressive and shit, and people scream and lose in their heads. And people don't want to lose.

And people don't want to lose, and they make a choice, and they make a stand, and they don't want to be on the wrong side. You know what I mean? I feel like one of the issues is people pick a team and then blindly adopt the policies of that team. And that I don't like. Like Harley, I see good in what Trump is doing. I didn't mind his corporate tax cuts. I thought that was worth a shot. Then there's some other stuff like children in cages,

pollution, where I'm like, man, it really seems like right and wrong is clearly defined in some of these. I'm not against Trump going to Kim, right? I don't think he knocked out of the ballpark, but it's too early to judge on that. And I've been pretty consistent on that all the way through. So let's see how this plays out.

I don't blindly knee jerk against what Republicans are doing. I like some and I dislike some. I certainly like the second amendment, but some of the other stuff I'm like, man, how do you see the right in putting kids in cages? How do you see the right in, in some of these How do you see the right in some of these things? Like it's just, there's just wrong here. What Trump was doing is he was using these kids as pawns,

hoping that the Democrats would get all the pressure on them. He falsely blamed the Democrats for saying, they did this, they did this, they did this. There's nothing I can do. It's the Democrats who did this and I'm stuck. My hands are tied, fund my border wall. That's what he was doing. He was using these kids. He was putting them in cages, hoping that he would get money for his wall. And then it played out not the way he hoped it would. He was taking all the blame because he could fix it and he didn't. And for

the first time, he backed down. I can't remember another instance where Trump backed down. He's lost before, like Obamacare, but he's always doubled down when things go wrong for him. And this is the time where he backed off. So that's new. That's because he was losing a lot of Republican support over it, too. Because the difference was, is that pretty much, you were right, we spoke about this on PKN,

pretty much most of the Republicans and all the Democrats are like, we don't like this kids in cage thing. And they all agreed on that. It was mainly Trump on that hill dying. And it was more so the disagreement on where to go from there, because the Democrats clearly want to go back to catch and release, which is just a way to, you know, allow more illegal immigrants into our country, scot-free, and the Republicans don't want to do that. And so it was like, by him doing this he's got one step closer to what kind of everyone wants but also he takes i he you know he thinks this is a big loss for him like and it is a big loss for him i think most people see that his wife

and daughter weren't on his side you know he acknowledged during the executive signing that some of the pressure that came from ivanka and melania was what caused him to yeah. Yeah, and I think that's the thing that's so divisive about this, is people are like, oh, either you want children in cages, or either you're beaten off to that, or you hate it, and you're a good angel. And it's like, no, we can all dislike that, and then we go maybe one layer deeper, and we go, okay, how do we actually handle this problem?

Catch and release? No, that's not going to work. And that's what a lot of people on the left are going to try and push for, and hopefully there's an appropriate response from people on the right for a real way to fix it. Because this is an issue that needs solving. And it just seems like we always get caught up on the thing that we disagree on most. I could be wrong on this because it just comes from my wife told me this. I didn't read it on my own. But I think this executive order thing lasts 20 days.

Does that sound right? Did you guys hear that? You mean the order itself last 20 days? That's what did you guys hear that you mean the order itself last 20 days that's what she told me i didn't see it myself but i was like like he could he could make a unilateral decision that lasts for a particular amount of time until yeah i think because didn't this occur before didn't this happen like when he first took took office didn't he do something using this executive order ability which are you thinking of the muslim ban yeah that's exactly what i was thinking where it was like it was instant i was like well i didn't know the president can just pull a trigger like that

and everyone's like they can but then it takes 30 days to to restore i don't think i really don't know enough on the subject there's yeah executive order is super complicated i watch the stuff like hawk and i still barely understand it oh being present is hard there are limits to what you can do via executive order and uh i i never seem to know what you can do the best thing he could have done is as soon as he took office if he executive ordered he's like weed legal everywhere in the country boom oh they're talking about that even yeah that's in canada now even if people were against them they'd be like yo i like this motherfucker weed so i've had some of these issues right um republicans were wrong about gay marriage for a long time i feel like it cost them more than it got them but that issue is kind of buried democrats in my opinion are wrong about

guns i feel like it costs them a lot more votes than they get from it. I don't want to say I'm pro-gun or anything. I think takeaway guns is the dumbest thing I've ever heard in my life. Okay. And Republicans mostly, but it's a little both sides. But Republicans are wrong on weed unless Trump changes this and flips the party to the other side. But I feel like them being the anti-weed party is costing them more than it's getting them. It would gain them so much.

It would bring so many people who are just kind of, who are like independents, who maybe agree with some conservative stuff, and maybe that's their single issue, right? They're single issue voters, and that's a big one for a lot of people. Especially, like, think of how many African Americans have been ruined by that, and by legalizing it on a federal level.

Like, what states have done is expunged those records, right? If you said, look, we're going to expunge the records of everyone who's been convicted on a marijuana law, like, the Democrats get 90% of the African American vote every presidential election. And I think in the last two out of five, the Republicans have still won. So if you take even 10% of that 90 away from them, I think Trump's getting reelected anyway. But he definitely gets reelected if you do that. Yeah, and a lot of it has to do in the U.S. is like, you got to know that it's pharmaceutical companies and alcohol companies that don't want weed to be legal because the alcohol industry is they're not losing money. They still make a lot of money. But in Colorado, they're not doing nearly as well as they did in years before they legalized it. You know,

the pharmaceutical industry, the those opiate pills, which on their own are an enormous problem. So many kids get addicted to those. So many kids die from it. I have actual friends who I've watched go through addiction problems with those pills. And it's so much easier for kids to fall into that because they're like, oh, this is a pill like mom and dad take. This isn't some scary needle. It's not some, you know, creepy pipe. It's just like a little, you know, Flintstone gummy.

I'll just take this. And before you know it, your life's fucking ruined but those industries have to be putting their you know boot on the throat of politicians who actually do want to get this legalized and it's only a matter of time at this point well the canadians it is going to happen yeah canada did it i i well it's it's like a it's like a major industry now like once it gets to a point where it's like like you know a billion dollar industry i expect you know usa to be like okay okay they need their own money to lobby these these politicians that's what they should be doing and and and perhaps it has to be in their benefit because right now a lot of those companies have a hard time with their banking and getting loans

and stuff like that they have to be like a cash business. And I guess they're keeping the cash literally in vaults and safe somewhere. Yeah. Right. So I, yeah, I've got two things I want to get out. Um,

one probably on this call, I'm the least pro weed person, but at some point like five or eight years ago, I realized like, you know what? Like even if you don't like weed, if you think that it holds people back from reaching their full potential, definitely prosecuting weed people does more harm for society than the weed itself does and that that's how i

came around to being pro weed you know what we're putting people in prisons and i'm talking about stopping people from reaching their full potential i think alcohol so that that was yeah i agree alcohol so much worse so that was one of the things. The other thing is the specific thing that Trump is rumored to be proposing is if the state makes it legal, then the Fed makes it legal in that state, if that makes any sense. So it's not going to be legal nationwide via Fed. You can still get busted on federal charges in like, I don't know, someplace it's illegal, Illinois or something. But in that state in colorado for example you'll be able to do your banking you'll be able to do all that stuff and that'll be nice yeah that house of cards has fallen down it won't even be like by 2020

it'll be legal pretty much everywhere i think like fucking missouri where i live just made it legal uh uh medically and usually you know it that's the first step yeah that's the first step like where I live, just made it legal medically. In two years? That's the first step. Yeah, that's the first step. It always goes from medical to legal for everything. And it's just going to be an avalanche of it. I think 2020 is very quick. Maybe 2022 after those

midterms. Who knows? I think it's going to be quick. It's going to be a cascade. At some point, I feel like you're right like like enough states legalize it recreationally that it's just like we're in the minority here of those of us who are who are spending all of this money on this and maybe the the lobby dollars of the of the um the the prison the prison systems that's another big lobbyist that's anti-marijuana, right? The people who benefit

from people being put in prison along with alcohol. That's so fucked up. Trump briefly made the prison system not private anymore. And I was like, yay. And then it flipped right back to private prisons.

I wonder what happened there. He got taken into a back room and shown. I wonder what happened there. Right? He got taken into a back room and shown the stuff that got Kennedy killed. I don't think of myself as a big conspiracy theorist, but I really feel like somebody pressured him or convinced him or lied to him or just got him to reverse what I thought was a great decision. Harley, are you playing any video games?

Yeah. What are you playing? I like playing PUBG. You know what? Why don't you do some ad reads and I'll tell you about my games when we get back from that. Oh, good call. Harley's involved over here.

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And that means more than Woody's. Because I'm still too young to tell. Who knows? I may end up going bald. But you won't with this. Harley, what do you have going on under that hat? I forgot you're a crazy hair person sometimes. Yeah.

Sorry to disappoint this time. Oh, Sane Harley. I went in, and I was like, yo, give me the tailor. Asshole. asshole yeah i've been i've been i've been all over the place been all over the place with hair yeah is is it because you're like pitching to walmart and stuff now you're a little more professional i don't think i have any color left i had uh i went and i did it blue i had it long and then i did it like blonde i did it gray i had it long and then i did it like blonde i did it gray i did it red i did a whole fucking the whole the whole uh spectrum of obnoxious youtuber colored hair colors i went and did them all um but i uh i uh i i finally

i finally just settled back on brown my last haircut literally like four days ago was the last piece of the color basically in it um well yeah now it's just regular shit uh but we were talking about games i really wanted to say i love i love pub g uh i still honestly i played battlefield 4 and battlefield 1 the most. I love those games so much. I was never a big Call of Duty guy, so when people are like, oh, Black Ops Battle Royale, I'm like, nah, I don't know. Have you guys played any Battle Royale games, by the way? I play a shitload of PUBG.

I've got hundreds and hundreds of hours. I was playing just before we started the show. I'm going to play after the show. I play on the experimental server and the test server. The test server right now has the new assault rifle they replaced the scar with the scars not in it anymore it's not on the test server on the island map like the sandhawk map the little four by four kilometer map yeah that map is the best map yeah i like it a lot they replaced the scar with this um this uh this bullpup 5.56 fully automatic rifle that is the best gun in the game right now.

It's fucking outrageous. They're probably going to nerf it before it goes on the live servers or on all the maps or whatever. It's fucking excellent. What's it called? It's a bunch of letters. It's like a QB something. Is it a real gun?

I don't know. I honestly don't know. I've never heard of it it's a it's this weird bullpup type rifle it kind of looks like a famas uh like like from black ops games uh yeah it's a fully automatic 556 uh assault rifle it's a lot of fun it's better than the scar it's better than the m4 pre-patch oh sweet i think it's like an aug uh like like like kind of like that but spawning in the world. And they increased the spawn rate to 1.4 times what the SCAR used to be. So it's just every fucking where.

Everybody's got one. So PUBG, I love the game. I think it's great. They're so funny. All these other battle royales come out. And hear me out. I think about games a lot sometimes. They have all these copycats.

Not copycats. Not copycats. Everyone can make one. It's not a copycat. But why is it that every game does these things? You fall out of a vehicle and you parachute or something down. And then you – it's similar weapons, real-life weapons. I like that. That's a good thing.

But then you're running from a gas closing in or something into the circle. Now, when I look at PUBG, I think PUBG is great, but I like playing it in squads. And this is what's interesting to me is people are like, PUBG is so cool. And then Fortnite is like, let's do that also. And every other game is like, let's do that also. And it's like, stop. and every other game is like let's do that also and it's like stop as a battlefield fan or as a fan of ghost recon and rainbow six and you know at a point like call of duty at once upon a time or halo if you gave me a game that was 25 squads of four people each squad i'm gonna like that game

like i think pub g's biggest best thing they have for it, above the looting system, above the entry system, and sure as hell above the mid-game system, is it's 25 squads of four men each. That's fucking awesome. I've been waiting for 100-person games my whole life. We never got them. So we're like, PUBG and all these other companies are like,

we got to make that game. But they all like all like it's like yo pub g isn't awesome because it starts off with the plane drop pub g isn't awesome because necessarily the blue gas it is cool because of the last man standing i like that but like why does every game have to do the drop the gas the looting and this is when i was thinking like well what if i owned a battle royale game what would i do differently and then i thought about it this way okay you know how like some games have squad archetypes like the assault guy he's got like you know that mid to long range gun he's got grenades the classes you know then they have the support guy who's just got 150 magazines you know and ammo for everyone

the medic the only guy that can heal other players and a sniper the only guy that will ever have a 16 times scope what if every squad each one of them had one of those people and then when you dropped in instead of having the blue zone chase you let's say your squad got notified head to this section and prevent this data upload and another squad got notified head to this section and upload the data so it's now two squads are going to have a forced encounter and you go there but the looting system is this you could pick up night vision you could pick up drones. And it's not even about the gas closing you in. It's about that last four squads, let's say, get notified about a particular building where it's like the squad that takes control of the rooftop gets extraction by helicopter. It's just kind of like forced encounters.

Where PUBG, there's a lot of like – I love PUBG. I think it's great. I actually think it's – Hey, Harley. Yeah. I love where you're going what would you think if after you won your encounter your squad got resurrected right so so you do a data upload i'm trying to prevent a data upload at the end i've got two guys left and we took out your four now i go back to four and four and rejoin you know compete with the other squads well well so I think the last man standing aspect was interesting. So I was thinking this, like, let's say like your squad is going to this point.

It's upload data. My squad's like, go download data. We go. And as we're meeting, you get there and you start to get ready to prevent me from uploading the data. You're going to play on defense. You get there first. But on my way to you, another squad who's just doing their thing happens to come across us. It's the

natural occurrence of the map. They take us out. Lucky for you, you guys are on edge for the entire five minute upload, looking out the windows. Where's the other squad? Where's the other squad? You don't even know that that other squad got killed in action on the way to you. So you're just like, cool, we got our objective. objective and by completing the objective maybe you're granted a drone so you could use this drone ability once or twice but i think people like the last man standing aspect but i agree with you on that i don't think it's the make or break and people are just the last squad standing is the point yeah well people people are really stuck well i think the medic class i think it'd be cool if he

could revive people but he's the only one so everyone's like yo protect them later yeah like you want that medic to not get killed and other teams are like that's the medic get the medic get the medic you know like it could be interesting uh there's a game called realm royale and it has classes it's a little sillier than i saw that it's fast people turn into chickens and then you go yeah yeah you get instead of getting knocked you turn into a chicken and hop around for 30 seconds and if you avoid being killed as a chicken you come back uh with all your shit still intact and everything and it has classes it has like a mage and a hunter and a warrior and an assassin and they're all slightly different but not quite as extreme as what you're

describing the newest one that i've seen i I was watching Shroud play today, it's called Fractured Lands. Yeah, it's like Mad Max. Mad Max. And you've got, everyone has their own car they spawn with. I like that. I like that idea. You customize the car.

So the car can have this big bulldozer front on it. It can have jetpacks. And it's super, super early. It's still pretty janky. The the moving around the mouse movement the sensitivity even the field of view is bad it seemed to be only getting like 62 frames per second on shrouds pc which is pretty similar like 150 i see sometimes it's framed yeah yeah 150 yeah i've got a pretty nice pc i've got a 1080 ti and um yeah buddy me too oh it's nice i and i've got a crazy nice PC. I've got a 1080 Ti. Yeah, buddy, me too. It's nice.

Fucking crazy bang for buck, that's for sure. For sure. I've got a 144 hertz 1440p monitor that I play PUBG on, and I'm just stuck at like 144 frames all the time when I overclock and shut all my programs down and everything. That's the funniest thing about PC products. It's PC products like they sell you something like my screen is 100 hertz, but you can overclock it to 120. Then it's like you can get your processor and it's normally 3.6 gigs.

Overclock it to 3.9. I'm like, why do PC people love to overclock their own fucking products? Why not just release the screen and be like, it does 120 hertz. Don't downplay it to 100 and be like, I don't know. You could overclock it. It's just like PC people love to overclock shit. It's like, yeah, I'm going to overclock it. It's like, why didn't they just...

My monitor is always overclocked. My computer is always overclocked. Everything's overclocked. Just release it as overclocked. Which monitor do you have? Because I have a 34-inch curved monitor that overclocks from 100 to 120. clock everything's overclocked just release it as overclocked which monitor you have because i have a 34 inch curved monitor that over clocks from 100 to 120 yeah i have the x34 that's where the predator oh yeah yeah i got one of those too that's very nice yeah that's here and then over

here i got the it's the it's the asus 27 inch 144 hertz it it has a better picture i think yeah the the i want a bigger screen I'm still waiting for like I need people are like 4k TV 4k TV. I'm like don't talk Hey, but a 4k TV. Let me know when they come out with that 50 inch 120 Hertz at least Monitor, I'm not about the 4k TV I need the fucking I need that refresh rate to the maximum because once i went from console to pc like i'm i'm i think i might be frames over resolution at the end of the day like i love

frames like i love it so much i'm like this isn't right someone's like what's wrong much it's 98 frames i'm not supposed to play this shit yeah you know like it's so funny it's like i love my like i've got the ben q that shroud has i think he's got a 27 and i've got the BenQ that Shroud has. I think he's got a 27, and I've got a 32 maybe or something like that. And it's 1440p and 144 frames. I really like it. It took a little getting used to going from the curved monitor to this one. But I intend to stream at some point, and I found out that with the 34 I couldn't stream because it's ultra-wide

without putting black bars on it and messing with the resolution. So I didn't to do that so i wanted to get used to this monitor you gotta let me know when you start streaming we'll stream together i stream on facebook now you stream on facebook yeah exclusively facebook uh kind of bounced in and hit up like a number of like one of one of my favorite youtubers to watch because he does battlefield videos with stone mountain oh i like that guy he advertised on pka yeah and so he he does uh he streams on facebook also so i know i'm like in good company and uh they it's basically like you are guaranteed an amount per month as long as you stream a certain amount and then there's benefits if you deliver a bit more than that um i mean if you're going to look into streaming launching, I would definitely consider looking into that, Kyle, because it also Facebook allows like the sharing aspect allows one to grow.

And YouTube does not have a good sharing system and the hosting system does not bring that much new eyes on Twitch. bring that much new eyes on twitch but facebook like if you're there and you're like yo everyone here share the stream like they click share and it goes to everyone as a network of like at least 100 people probably 400 people yeah i've got to grow up pretty fast i'm kind of happy with where i'm at on facebook right now i think it's fucked up that epic mealtime made more money on facebook last month than on youtube like that's a huge huge thing in in in the world like in in in my world like another website made more money for epic mealtime than youtube itself like youtube has always been the bread and butter of epic mealtime but facebook outperformed it yeah that's interesting i hadn't considered facebook but i've got like two million like yeah dude on facebook or something like kyle they'll

probably jump on it you know get get like a management or something to reach out to them to do it uh consider that you know like yeah definitely let me know because we should we should you know get down and dirty together. Did you guys ever play Mass Effect? No, I never got into it. I'm more of an Elder Scrolls guy. That's why I was going to mention that there's a mod coming out for Skyrim called Skyrim Together that will allow co-op in Skyrim. They've been working on it for like...

I love Elder Scrolls also. I literally, no joke, just randomly went and bought Elder Scrolls also. Literally, no joke. Just random. I went and bought Elder Scrolls online a couple days ago. Skyrim together is going to be sick because it'll allow full mod support. I can have any mod imaginable on my end.

As long as you have the same mods, we play co-op and the game views us each as NPCs. Everything works. I can heal you i can like freeze you uh we can do pvp or that's cool the whole story together we can each have like companions and stuff and uh it's it's so funny like i found this uh comment the other day and uh this guy posted on the skyrim together subreddit by the way the skyrim together mod has been in the in the works for years like three four years or something, and it's

almost done. It's like 95% done now. They have a Patreon that makes almost three grand a month with people helping to finance this thing and get it done. You guys have a Patreon? Yeah, we do. And the link is in the description for anyone that wants to support. I love you, Harley. It absolutely is.

This is a funny comment this guy posted on the Skyrim Together subreddit. He says, I'm wondering if it's possible to add a BDSM mod for Skyrim, Skyrim Together, when it comes out. It would be really cool if my friend could tie me up in the game and dominate me. Holy shit. This will be nice, especially if VR is a thing. I love that guy. I'm not even into BDSM, and I think I'd have fun with that.

Yeah, exactly. You can get into it after this. Yeah, one of your spells, you could just leave someone tied up and gagged, humiliated. You're not into BDSM, that's true. You're not into BDSM, that's true. But Woody Hiss, the Archmage of the Mages Guild, is into BDSM. Oh, he's big into pup play.

What's that? Pup play. Pup play? You treat one like a dog, maybe? Oh, yeah. That's where one person is like the dog. It's called pup play. Did you just make that up?

No, I didn't make that up. Go to reddit.com slash party.biz Well now you're gonna, now you're gonna, I'm about to take it. Okay, link it, let's see. Is it.biz? No, I just made a joke. Okay, because it cut out for a second, I was like, I refuse to go to a.biz. Wow, I think that tale is...

My computer cost me a lot of money. I don't want to break it now by going to.biz. I was going to top all time on pup play. My partner told me he wants to get involved in pup play. What do I need to know? My partner told me a few months ago, I haven't even pre-read this, that he's keen to explore this kink.

He's got himself a couple of hoods, and I'm not really sure where to go from there. I've been subbed here for a while in hope of learning something that'll help us on our journey into this, but all I see is people posing in masks and are rooing and very little actual discussion. Can someone enlighten me a little

on how I can become a good handler for my partner or at least understand my pup better? Well. Go to all, or not all, top all time on pup play. And at first it may just seem like pure deviancy, but really it's the same guy posting over and over. His name is Easy Breezy.

It's the same dude. They're all posts of him. And he doesn't even look like a dog. Or I guess his BDSM mask does have ears. He looks more like Batman. Do you guys see these dog pictures that I'm looking at?

I'm not getting it. Your internet is failing you. You're back. Do you guys see what I'm looking at here? Do you see these pictures? All these guys in the dog masks. Yeah.

All these guys. Just easy breezy. guys just just easy breezy well this picture confirms that i know where the tail is is my is my mic working yeah yeah it wasn't your mic your internet has been breaking up throughout the night are you on wireless damn i'm on wireless but i I have wireless receptors, and I have one gigabyte down and 950 megabytes up. But I'm going to call them and give them shit because four times a day I do the speed test, and I track it, and it's never once been one gigabyte down, ever. Now, wait. Are you testing it on wireless? To get off internet talk for a sec, imagine being the head desk person

at the fucking Courtyard Marriott when this group shows up to hang out in your ballroom. It's a bunch of half-naked men in dog masks on their knees. But can I say something? If you look at these guys, these pub play guys, I promise you guys i promise you i promise you that in skyrim i would join the pup play guild just to get the pup play armor because it looks like it would be the sickest armor in the game and i love the idea of being

a khajiit and being in the pup play guild so you're a cat man doing pup play and that's what skyrim's all about or it should be about at least i like it i was gonna say earlier like i'm okay with being dominated but only if the other player is a khajiit what is is that a name a khajiit it's like the cat people like the sneaky like tiger cat people i saw a picture on reddit and it was like a cat staring at a khajiit create a character on reddit and it was like a cat staring at a khajiit creative character on skyrim and it was like have big dreams or something like that it was a good picture but i i brought up mass effect before because i i was like mass effect one two and three were like the sickest games ever i loved them so much but then andromeda was the biggest piece of shit but you guys know andromeda is like in another galaxy yeah it is another galaxy it is

yeah you're right it is another galaxy uh so like you you're like the whole concept is your ship went and traveled 600 light years to get there and the first thing that happens is when you get there is like aliens in pants with belts shoot at you with guns i'm like what the fuck 600 years of traveling away from our galaxy and they got guns here like they have pants it right away ruined everything for me i was like you're not gonna you're gonna have pants in andromeda no one holds up their two-legged pant trousers with belts like that's our shit we did that and right from there i just hated the game it was really it really me. It was the biggest disappointment in gaming for me. So you don't think

like aliens wearing pants, you don't care for that. I'm cool with aliens wearing pants. But if you get on a ship and you travel 600 years of light speed travel to another galaxy, and the first thing you run into is people wearing pants with guns. Yeah, and there's a boat lay on the corner.

That's way too close. That's like way too close.'s like way too close that's like you're in fucking you're in texas like right away you just travel that far away texas like it's really not that different they should be like energy or something they shouldn't even have corporeal forms i actually i thought of the best i thought of the best way for for mass effect if if in mass effect one two and three are attacked by the reapers they're super ai robots and they're like super crazy robot species they want to turn you into robots blah blah blah mass effect one two and three are incredible but in between mass effect two and three when they think that the world is going to get taken over by the reapers you have a ship that leaves with 20 000 colony like people to start a new colony that's mass

effect andromeda i like the idea so you're traveling you're not you're not a soldier you're not going with guns and you're gonna go kick ass and take names you're just you're trying to survive so it's it's about building a new society so you're all specialists so you travel for 600 years and you leave but i thought it'd be pretty cool if 300 years after you left, humanity basically, like when you land on Andromeda and the door opens, instead of being greeted with enemies that shoot at you, I thought it'd be so cool if it were humans. And you were like, what the fuck? And they were like, well, it just so happens that 300 years ago, humanity, technology advanced past where you were and we were able to get here before you and we've been colonizing this place for 50 years now and you're like yeah so it's like you're not really you were supposed to be this badass like guy that was gonna like build a new society but they're

already here building the society for you so can you help us and go get some shit from the jungle and help pick us and hunt because in andromeda you end up doing that anyways they were terrible fetch quests so i thought it'd be cool if they make you do fetch quests and you're like damn like i was supposed to run this operation but instead i just handed over my ship with the 20 000 people who were cryogenically frozen because these humans are here and they're they're better suited than we are we have they have technology we don't even know how to use. And then as the game starts to unravel about two hours in, you realize that these humans are actually the Reapers.

And the Reapers won the war hundreds of years ago. And they came here to beat your ship. And you're the only person that knows that. And a lot of the crew on your ship doesn't believe you. And you just handed over essentially the last 20,000 humans to the Reapers. And there's no aliens here. It's the continued fight from the last three Mass Effects. And you've got to figure out how the fuck you're going to get the last 20,000 humans away from these robots that don't know that you know right away that they're the bad guys.

away from these robots that don't know that you know right away that they're the bad guys and it's like that would be like so much more well thought out than being like yeah you got here there's other aliens and they got same guns as you do back home and they're gonna shoot at you i played that game and i was like fuck this game have you ever seen the movie pandorum yeah i have seen that pandora's a really good sci-fi movie. Basically, the last, like, I don't remember the numbers, but let's just say 20,000 humans leave Earth on this colony ship headed for this planet system that's going to take them, like, 100 years to get to or something like that. And as they're flying away, like, Earth sends its last message,

like, Earth is destroyed. So these, like, 20,000 people are the last people in existence. And some shit goes wrong and uh some of the people get woken up too early and they've just been living on the ship and they've all been injected with this like uh genetic modifying virus that's supposed to make them uh adapt to the new planet they're going to be colonizing but instead they've been living in the dark depths of this spaceship that's traveling through space and it's been turning them into like the subterranean like monsters like ghouls like ghouls i want to i actually want to see this it's fucking

good i won't spoil it but like it's got a crazy twist ending it's got ben foster and uh i can't who and another guy that's like a well-known actor. I'm going to check that. Dennis Quaid. Did you guys see Annihilation? I haven't seen it yet. I hear great stuff about it. I liked it a lot. I liked it a lot. It's a really cool movie. Yeah, I want to watch it. I want to watch

it on a big screen. I'm about to go somewhere and watch it on a big-ass 4K TV, so I've been waiting for that. Did you guys watch The Expanse? No. Woody likes likes and i heard it got picked up and it's got like crazy rotten tomato reviews so i've been planning on watching the third season the first season was great because i like sci-fi so like i just liked it second season was good the third season i was like damn man some of these characters are the best characters on tv now this is okay so great i really recommend it yeah I'll check it out.

And because of the third season, they didn't know they were going to make it. So they kind of go all guns out. There's a part where it's like six months later, and it's like, fuck yeah, six months later. Normally on TV shows, that six months later is a shit season. It's a shit garbage filler half season.

Season two of The Walking Dead. What if they'd done that in The Walking Dead? They're they're like six months later and they're leaving that goddamn farm i yeah exactly didn't didn't shane and at the end of the first the second season yeah milk that a they milked it for an entire season of them i was like no this is done in book one in the fucking the comics yeah they're bringing shane back this ninth season, and then they're killing off Rick and Maggie. I think Shane's going to be there as like a hallucination or like a flashback character, but he's coming back. He's going to be in this next season of The Walking Dead. As soon as Rick's gone, I'll stop watching.

Like he's kind of the driving factor for why I like the show. Well, you know what's funny is because like the kid left, right? Yeah, he got killed. Well, he died. I used to read the book, the graphic novels. Yeah, I did too. And as it was going, it was like Carl started to wear the cowboy hat. And Rick was fucking up left and right.

And he was talking to a make-believe. His wife, what was her name again? Lori. Lori. He was talking to Laurie on the phone and he's not actually the phone's not plugged in and Carl's like what are you doing dad and he was like I'm talking to your mom on the phone

sometimes when I'm sad I listen to the phone and I hear her voice he's like listen and he listened he goes just as I thought he's like you're losing your fucking mind and he's like nine or ten and he's already killed two people and countless zombies so you're like carl's fucked up so you just knew or at least i felt like it was going to get to a place where like

rick would die and carl would be the guy and carl would be so much more closer to like the governor than rick because he's grown up in this shit and he doesn't like respect his dad's like honor or anything it would be very interesting and sad and heartbreaking just as the show always is raised like that is going to be worse than like harley the worst characters so much better than the actual show i like well that's it that's where i thought the book was going and then and then the the i started to watch the show and i stopped i just i stopped after a while but i did tune in to see what they would do with Glenn. Because that was. I've never got so fucked up by a book page in my life. Like a book page.

Like that scene in the graphic novel. Is crazy. You're like sitting there and you're reading. And you're reading. And you've been reading like fucking like. You've read like at this point. Like 2,000 pages with pictures of this guy Glenn. And Glenn does no wrong.

He's always on the right side. This guy's the best. This guy is the best. And then you get to that scene where it's eeny, me mo and you're like huh and you turn the page and like it's a full spread of glenn exactly like in the show eyeball shot out the most nauseating shot and you're like i literally was just like like you put the book down you're like walking around i was like no that is fucked up you can't do me like that you can't let a picture i'm a grown-ass man i can't let this picture do what you go back like oh my god glenn not glenn it's so crazy i had to watch it on the show and they were so smart when they kill that other guy and you're like i'm like guys

in the books you have no idea oh shit they just did it yeah i'm like they just did i just had i just had like a relapse of that but then i literally tuned into the next episode i was like i don't need this in my life yeah that was the best episode in my like like that's the episode where according to like all the websites they lost a ton of viewers but for me that's like top three episodes of all time oh that was the best that episode was incredible but they lose people because it was kind of like you set a peak where like we're not going to be back here are we you know where the peak was for me the episode before that the cliffhanger something about them driving around in the rv trying to get scary what's

the woman's name who's pregnant maggie i watched that one also i agree that was a great trying to get maggie to the doctor and then blocking the road. And it's like the first time they block the road, there's maybe five people blocking the road. If I remember it right. And you're like, I guess it's smart to avoid conflict, but they might have won. The next time there's like 10 or 15 and it's like, ah, harder to win, still possible. Then after that, it's worse and worse. And the obstacles they're putting in the road, it's clear that they have access to construction equipment

or manpower or something that just... That's way beyond our reach. It's a show of force that we didn't know still existed on this planet. And by the end of it, you're like, oh my God, there's like 200 people. I'm going off my foggy memory. And they're just screwed. yeah i agree completely like like through up until that point you had never seen an enemy that you didn't think that rick and the crew could best given

their best on their best day like if we get a strategy down if we come at this just right if we ambush them or if we lure them into a no one was ever as tactically advanced as rick was like exactly oh yeah i agree like he kept dealing with like thugs and barbarian type people even the the governor was kind of insane so you could take advantage of that to some extent he he was a he was overly aggressive plus that was like you broke up shown that hand mostly Michonne that handled it. Can you hear me? Yeah, you're getting it now.

Mostly Michonne handles the governor, ultimately. No? In the book, that's where Laurie gets blasted by the governor with a shotgun and she's holding the baby and the shotgun blast kills her and the baby in one shot, in the book. So you're just like, wow, it's just rick and carl yeah that's hardcore i you know what the craziest thing in the books

were which also happened in the show but i felt that it there's something about turning a page and being like oh is they got to the prison and there's been all this shit going on i'm just like damn they're going to the cafeteria they're like we got to clear the prison we got to go there i'm like oh my god the doors are locked shut they're going to the cafeteria. They're like, we got to clear the prison. We got to go there. I'm like, oh my God, the doors are locked shut. They're going to open these doors. It's going to be the worst shit. And I'm like, it's going to be like 5,000 zombies. They open the doors and I was like, oh my God.

I'm like, that's the worst thing ever. It was just three human beings in convict jumpsuits and they just wave at them and it's the end of an issue and you're like that sucks because now it's like you've got people that are like we can't have these cons and it's like do the orange jumpsuits mean that much now that it's the zombie apocalypse are they really the enemy but it's like yo they're gonna fuck our wives and eat us or some it's like what did they do though right like like this a mass murderer? Or is this like a guy who stole a car? Right? We don't give a fuck about GTA, motherfucker. Like, if you stole cars,

if you did white collar crime, if you assaulted someone. You need someone who can hotwire shit. If you're a loose cannon that like, ate his fucking, like, you know, father's dick after he killed him, that's not something you want to carry around. If it's a rapist or a child molester or like a violent sociopath though like we have no way of knowing

who these people are we just have to take them at their word for me because sometimes you put yourself in the human scenario and it's like what would you do and it's like i wouldn't want to deal with people zombies it's like burn them shoot them in the head humans and you don't know their motives like and and that was it like he had a what was his name robert kirkman is that his name yes he had the best his the way when i read the first prelude of the very first story which applies to the show in the book was this doesn't have an end this doesn't have a cure the zombies are not the enemy the humans are and it will show you how humans change over time and how they grow in the face of such horrible events and that's what it was always about when i got to that point i was like this is what walking dead is about how are they going to handle this what are they going to do with that

what are you going to do when it's like but she's pregnant and all that stuff and that's where carl ends up killing someone does that happen in the show carl kills a kid uh yeah carl kills the kid but but the kid was uh with the governor killer the kid was like with the one of the governor's men if you can even call him that and carl had him at gunpoint and he was like put your gun down and the kid's like lowering his weapon and carl just kills him fuck yeah carl baby shit real deal one of the another one of the best episodes is like season five i bring up all the time on this show but like it was when that guy was gonna rape carl and uh and oh yeah just loses his shit and and we could watch that scene if you want because i it's it's it's one of the best scenes in the whole yeah i want to see it yeah yeah let me find it i'm excited while he finds

it woody i was just before they came i was just recommending that they watch the expanse are you caught up on this show oh no i am not caught up on this season i saw the first two seasons i think dude i'm jealous because the third season is the best season really hands down like you know amos the marine dude who's like a real jarhead badass dude yeah he's strong and yeah you know the character's almost the actor's almost not as strong as the character i think yeah that actor and character and everything he becomes your willie became my favorite in third season he is the he's one of those guys where you know he's such a fucked up dude and she's like yo this guy's an idiot he's

so violent but then when you come across other violent people and then he steps in the room you're like yeah yeah our star our guy who's fucked up uh-huh and and he has a whole different like like you know they walk in and they're like look at this whore house or whatever and he's like what he's like i rented an apartment here yeah yeah he was it was he did he grow up in a whore house or something he's like they're just working it's an honor house you get more in the third season of his background at one point where you're just like oh so that's where he comes from yeah he's background he comes from a tough neighborhood and uh i like him a lot he gets very good and the actor is downplayed he he seemed weak to me i was like i don't really like this guy he's boring But then you realize it's because he's broken. He's like a broken person and they play it much better and the actor figures it out.

And I'm jealous for all you guys because you guys get to watch it. But season three, like I was saying to the guys, they didn't realize that the show was going to continue. So they just go hold no holds barred. They go all out. And there's even one point where it's like six months later, which I was is normally on tv shows six months later is a shit season of the show but this one they just do it and it's really really excellent oh i should catch up yeah the expense let's watch the scene uh okay did you send it to us yeah yeah i'm ready why i see my shit's glitching man my skype is like is not the regular skype it's it's like i've got

a black night mode and you guys send me shit and it's not popping up the last thing i have is the dog picture that i sent i always have to scroll down to get it yeah i'm doing that right now my favorite scene from the show is when you see that really cool deer oh my god the idea is so garbage. Oh, it's so bad. It's so fucking stupid. If the link's not showing up, Harley, if you just search Carl Rape, it's the one. Oh, great. Now I'm on a list.

There. Did my link work? It's the same one. Which one? The 2 minute 43 second one? Yep. Yeah. 2.

Yeah. 2. 42. Yeah. Are we ready? Yep. Ready, set, play. Throw the death.

Then we'll have the girl. Then the boy. Then I'm going to shoot you and then we'll be squared. Let him go. Stop. You're squared. They picked the creepiest looking guy in America to play the worst. Where he head butted him. Pride rules, I like it. Is he going to go Hulk mode? This guy is so creepy, the rapist. Yeah Rick! Haha! The scene is so dark I can barely see it. This emboweled him. Cut him from fucking groin to

collarbone. And now he's just making meat pie out of him like fucking Mel Gibson in the Patriot. You know what I liked? This is one thing I appreciated. Instead of... Can you guys hear me? Yeah.

The guy started to beg for his life. He started to say sorry or whatever it is he was saying. I noticed that too. And then that's a scene where a lot of people might start monologuing right there. Oh no, you did this

so I'm going to do that and lay out... No. He just killed him fucking john wick style i like that because it's more realistic like in real life you're not gonna be like and another thing is you were gonna rape my kid just now i heard you say it we all heard you say no you know you just be in a feverish rage bloodlust you just slaughtered that guy i i did at that part also like i saw that and he was like whoa and I was like you don't do that now

You don't get to be like we was just joking around His car you tried to fuck his son We was just joking around we wasn't really gonna fuck him like that We're gonna fuck his little boy like and you know what like I would have been like instead of cutting him up like that I would took him like like not bitch. I'm like Carl come here. Fuck this man Yeah, it sends a message Always talking about corrective rape now I know what it is talking about corrective rape.

Now I know what it is. That's heavy. I'm not sure Harley's a good parent right now. Nothing would smell worse than an apocalyptic ass crack. Can you imagine? First of all, they picked the creepiest fat overweight guy who's got silt

in his fucking folds from years ago at this point. His hair was like like if I went into the the barber shop and was like make me look like a Give me like a the serial rapist look that's the one they would give you they'd share And they'd leave this long the ball mullet like it's called a scholar. You are wrestler 28 years ago Pro wrestler is a bad guy now you work at steak and shake You were a wrestler 28 years ago. A bad one. A pro wrestler.

You were the bad guy. Now you work at Steak and Shake. That guy smells like ice beside me. Speaking of ice, he's up to a few new things, isn't he? Can I tell you one of my favorite clips on the internet, by the way? When I first started doing Twitch in 2014, I do Facebook now. When I first started doing Twitch, I was like, yo, I'm like, what is this content? It was a guy with one shaved eyebrow yelling at his Twitch stream chat because someone donated and used the N-word in text-to-speech. And he was like, I just put a down payment on a house and you guys

are gonna cost me this and he was like swearing at them and like the chat was so insane and the messages that were coming through and i was just like what the fuck is this and how is this the pinnacle of entertainment of the future which i truly believe that like i would watch like brian and hampton getting hit by a car and i'm like that is the future of internet brandon hampton the black weightlifter dude no brandon hampton's the skinny guy that wears like a jean jacket with like no shirt on he's like i don't give a fuck fuck all y'all fuck you fuck your ass i'll beat your ass right now i still get my dick sucked more than all you motherfuckers you know that guy guy No, I don't think I roll with ice all the time. He's always in the videos

So I would watch these guys and I'd be like, yo, I'm like this is crazy and I was watching it like the the best clip is That's cliff is ice Poseidon sip You know the sip. I Don't know the sip. Please. I don't go on YouTube The sip it's like it's literally we're looking at you don't even need to queue it up Just click it right away because it's like two it's two seconds long What it is not finding it under this sip I guess he put up to know ice beside and sip and Click on ice taking a sip. Oh here. It is eight seconds long

Scenario is so good because it's like people people are watching and people are watching and it's it's there's always this element of like you think you think it's like like i don't know explain it that well so it's gonna be hard for me because just in my brain but it's like people are watching you you know people are watching you you're so casual at knowing that the people are watching you but acting like they're not there but you are always aware that they're there god forbid you suck the straw and suck real straw or strong on that straw you're gonna hear the 20 000 cx army like for the next month being like keep sucking on that straw big boy or whatever the fuck they'll do so god forbid he sucks longer than what's necessary but he finds out that the suck that he is committed to

is not a big enough suck or a long enough suck. So he didn't suck it enough. But he now can't, like, you know, keep sucking. He's got to abandon the suck. But he can't pull away from, you know, being such a pussy that he can't suck the strawberry up in there. So he lies. His mouth makes the noise. Yeah, he lies and he does this.

He tastes the sip that was not complete but we see through the straw god has it that we witnessed the straw that it never got there so this is the most perfect content possible this is the most pure uncut best content on the internet that fucking eight second sip, and I would never be able to explain to people why that is so incredible, that sip, unless you were really there for all of it, like, it's just so excellent.

He never sipped it. He didn't want to suck it that much, but he also needed to suck it more. And then he lied about it when he tastes it. This is a channel with 32 subscribers and a video with almost 300,000 views. I'm 10,000 of those

views. That 8 second sip, I've seen it 4 hours worth in my life. When I first saw that sip, I think I was high and I was trying to look up how to auto replay a YouTube video over and over again so I don't need to click again and again because I needed to keep seeing the sip. The sip is just so incredible

this moment. This moment is my favorite moment in YouTube history. We need a viewer to make one of those 10 hour versions of Ice taking a sip just for Harley. So he can watch it. That is hilarious because he puts it down so tentatively and then makes the face of,

oh, I just tasted something that definitely wasn't just cold strawberry air. He was going to lie to us about that sip. That sip was a lie. He lied to everyone, but we saw. We saw through the lie. It was foreshadowing to his relationship with Caroline. I found this little gif here.

If you want to watch this, this is someone trying to beat up a guy dressed as Jesus Christ I bet it doesn't go well Well the power of Christ compels you Um I clicked it. Yeah. Oh, he's parrying all this guy's hits. Yeah, why is that guy? This looks like an Assassin's Creed fight. Oh, they're just like stupid and you could easily counter them every single time Why the counter why to counter why to Why to counter? Why to counter? Why to counter?

And then it's like, execute. Yeah. It looks like a video game right now, this encounter. This is like a video game. Wow, Jesus gets a nice shot in. Yeah. I like the first Assassin's Creed because never before in a game

have I pressed so few buttons in a fight and had the guy make such creative moves from the same button over and over and i like that though i i didn't like in the newest one it's more like a dark souls vibe it's like more skill based and all that and i'm like god damn it i just love beating the fuck out of like 15 one at a time one guy will come up one at a time you're like kick his ass and then the next guy kick his ass and my move used to be like i used to go unarmed and when they would attack you you would press the counter button and it would automatically

take their weapon from them now when you press x it's in one hit kill because they can't defend it so it's a cool cool execution and then i would drop that weapon look at the next guy and he would come with his weapon and i would disarm it and kill him with it and drop it and these guys would be like 15 dudes in a line waiting to get fucking surrounded by bodies and like 11 evenly distributed swords the first time i ever played assassin's creed uh i didn't know how to play it i jumped in on like the fourth title or something it might have been pirate ship based i don't know no it was like civil war Civil War, whatever. And I'm worried I'm going to suck. And at this point, I'm really popular. So there's like 3,000 people watching me play this game. And I don't know how to play at all, but it's so easy.

I'm really good. I'm just like, I'm just without weapons, beating up 15 people at a time, parkouring all over the place. Someone in the chat says you can jump from any distance so long as you land in hay. Well, you know, that's not hard to do. And there are so many wagons of hay around that I would be playing that game in the first one and sprinting to the edge of a building and I'm like, I gotta jump.

They're gonna get me and I'm almost dead. And you just jump and thank God, below every strategic point in that game, there's a lot of hay for you to land in. You don't even have to check. If it's an area you can jump off of, just leap. You're going to be fine. You'll be all right.

Remember I was saying I think about video games for an extended period of time. Sometimes I thought about the best Assassin's Creed game. This would be the best one. Assassin's Creed, Vietnam. The reason being one, it's very close to today and it was a very controversial war. So you could,

you could implement your Templars however you want. But what's so cool about it is a green berets in like in, in Vietnam used to like navigate the jungles barefoot to not make any noise so the idea of being like a green beret assassin's creed and you took the assassin's creed three like tree climbing abilities and the ones that were kind of in black flag a little bit so you can navigate the jungle quickly and you're like a barefoot green beret and instead of the assassin blade it pulls out like a rambo combat knife and the ghillie suit is the point in hood so it's like a ghillie suit and you're like in the jungle and it's like that

would be such a cool setting and i i i think like i know i was there personally asked if they would ever implement guns and they were kind of like really against it i guess it goes too much to splinter cell territory at that point but an assassin's creed where i have an m16 and a combat knife and i'm navigating the jungle and there's like controversy and and treachery afoot that's what i want like i like you like a rambo exactly if you want to play the game like that like you could do with that stuff just like you you could be running in the streets killing everyone with a big-ass axe in Assassin's Creed Brotherhood or whatever or the other ones. It would be cool if you had that option to go and, like, take an M16. And, like, if you had, like, some crazy napalm traps.

And if you could hide, like, under the fucking grass and pop up and shit. And, like, I don't know. Or you could play as the Vietnamese and, like, set up those punji stick traps. Maybe your guy is Vietnamese. Maybe the assassins is Vietnamese. Press X to apply shit to punji pit. Insufficient shit. Find food.

Not enough fiber. The shit comes off. The shit falls off in the rain. You must replenish that's a good idea i see the you guys see the trailer for my friend pedro at e3 this year no no i haven't watched any e3 stuff uh what's my friend pedro my friend pedro is like this game is insane it is like i don't know who makes it but it's like i it's kind of like exactly what you would like uh maybe you would want like a deadpool a deadpool game to be like for real

but oh yeah i saw this this is incredible yeah yeah it's really really insane like just such an impressive game it's like uh it looks like one of those twin stick shooters like if like uh like shadow complex made love with like like trials hd i don't know it's it's the guys like spinning around in slow motion with like dual wielded like fully auto pistols just yeah and then you get massacring and like a skateboard and you could like kick a frying pan in the air and then like shoot bullets off the frying pan, kick flip your skateboard at someone. Like it looks, it just looks perfectly fun. It looks great.

It looks like one of those games where I like, I don't know. Everyone made big deals about the big boys there. But after the fact, I was like, where was this game at? I could have used this game. It it just looks like like mindless fun yeah like yeah i agree just cool blow people up there seems to be a lot of gore in this yeah and the description is pretty perfect if you skip to like 130 you'll see like the skateboards and the rolling on oh the frying pan's hilarious yeah the car the motorcycle it's great mean, it's not ice beside and taking a sip of a strawberry milkshake great, but it's up there.

Yeah, that looks like a lot of fun. I saw the Halo trailer, and I was just like, boo, boo. You didn't like the Halo trailer? Because I know you like that game. Oh, I hate 343. I like Bungie. Wait, 343, their biggest mistake was they were like hey Master Chief is cool And all won't you want this guy? Look he'll punch Matt Master Chief in the face and break his visor. It's a

when I Think that's what we wanted. This is the equivalent of playing Mario Odyssey and And at the beginning, it's like you play as Terry. The Mario at the beginning of the game. It's like, why would you do that? The Master Chief is the fucking sickest guy. I mean, respect the Spartan Locke, but I don't want to be him and hunt down the Chief and punch the Chief in the face. I want to be the Master Chief. The biggest thing about Infinity is this.

You will play as Master Chief the entire game, they said. Only master chief. And he better say fucking nine words the whole game. They'll probably reveal his face or something. They'll do something stupid. No, they won't. They won't do it. I don't think they will.

No, they'll reveal, and it's going to be a black trans woman. Competing against the other girls so she wins. He's going to take his helmet off and kiss Sergeant Johnson on the lips at the beginning of the game. He's going to be in love with Cortana which will make him in love with

inanimate objects or droids just like Glando Calrissian. Maybe he's got a boy mask under there. Who's to say? Well, then I are actually improving the game. What I found was so funny about it is, I'm a huge Halo fan. Halo might be one of my number one favorite games ever, ever.

I love the series. I always did. And the last one was just Halo 4, Halo 5 there or whatever. But I saw this Halo Infinite trailer trailer it's so funny i'm watching i'm like okay halo all right they show like the animals running i'm like okay they're showing like the marines and they pop a smoke i'm like okay whatever and then like the chief's helmet pops in and it goes in like that halo music and i was like oh shit and then it's like and like the music comes in i'm like yeah i'm like this game's dick hey boy and it's because i'm a fan that music and i'm being honest the halo theme song

is right up there with the fucking imperial March. I'm glad you said that. Yeah. That's how I am for Star Wars. Dude, can we talk Star Wars for a second? Did you read that they're not doing all the spinoff shows now? They're getting canceled. Go on. So everyone, full disclosure, The Last Jedi, I fucking love that movie.

I give it a 9.5 on 10. I thought it was incredible. I loved it. I think Solo was – I thought Solo was a terrible Star Wars movie. Oh, did you? Not terrible. It was my least favorite Star Wars movie, which means like I'm someone that like the prequels, I don't hate them because I like what they did for the universe.

We came out with some shitty movies because all we wanted to see was, remember that old Republic trailer where they're like the Sith have returned and they smash a ship into the Jedi Temple and like 100 Sith run out and they're fighting like 100 Jedi and there's fucking stormtroopers there. Like that's what we wanted in the prequels and we never got that. We got like, you know, the goofy shit that we got. But they did introduce like the Jedi Council. They introduced like Darth Maul. You know council they introduced like darth maul you know they introduced like some aspects of it that i liked and i respected there were some goofy decisions uh and secondly duel of the fates is like the best fucking star wars music ever that

that track is awesome i love that so i like a lot of things the prequels did but the movies were goofy the lines were terrible and and and darth vader before he became darth vader in the mask like darth vader like tucking in the younglings and putting them to bed darth vader i like that and i wish that had more time to breathe and i i wish the movie ended with him getting cut in his arms and legs and that's it because i thought it would have been really cool. If I could show my kid that doesn't exist yet. Or doesn't exist at all. No one's pregnant. Or that you don't know about. No nothing.

Yeah. But I would like to show him 1, 2, and 3. And not reveal Darth Vader in episode 3. Let Anakin die. And just die. And let everyone think Anakin died. And then let us someone watch 1, 2, 3 and still get the Empire Strikes Back reveal

if you watched it in order. You didn't need to show that, but there was goofy decisions left, right, and center, but I thought that they did some cool things for the universe, but Solo, I fucking hate it. He's like, Solo, you're by yourself, eh? Okay, I'll mark you down as Han Solo. I'm like, his name is literal?

How fucking dumb is this i was like what's up with this stupid worm when he had the thermal detonator he's like click and she was like you made that noise with your mouth and he's like yeah well you're really prone to light damage and you're in a room filled with windows and he shoots a rock through a window and it's like what the fuck is this crime lord doing in this really sensitive area where like hail, even just bad hail will get her burnt and we'll destroy her home. You know, there was some goofy shit in that movie. I hate it when that girl took off her mask and there was like a reveal and

it's like, what is just a girl. Okay. Don't make a big deal about it. You're the ones making a big deal. Now it's just be like, yeah, girls kick ass.

Why do we need to be like, ha, it's a beautiful young girl. It's just like, there's no reveal here. Don't punch in on her face. And you know what? This is Star Wars. We like our characters with masks on all the time. She should

keep her mask on. Let us know it's a girl, but don't take the mask off. She's fucking cool with the mask on. Just like Boba Fett. We don't even need to see him with the mask off, you know? Or Captain Phasma. I don't even need that. It's not even just a Star Wars thing. Like, there's so many times in movies where they do the mask reveal, you know? Or Captain Phasma. I don't even need that. It's not even just a Star Wars thing. Like, there's so many times in movies where they do the mask reveal that it's like, I just wish they wouldn't do it.

I wish they wouldn't do it. The whole mystique is what makes it more interesting. Like, I don't want to take it off, and then it's just, oh, that's a guy I might be in line behind at the store, or a guy who might be ahead of me at Qdoba, who points his finger over the glass at the ingredients and is just saying what he wants. You don't want that guy.

He's just an ethereal guy. You know what was stupid? And by the way, spoilers, spoilers, spoilers, spoilers, spoilers, everyone, spoilers. What was so stupid is Han Solo goes to kill that... Oh, you didn't watch it yet? Okay, forget it. I'm done. I'm not going to say it.

I'm not going to say it. You could have. Yeah, there's no point. So I haven't seen Solo. My opinion might change when I see it like you could have yeah there's no point so there's i haven't seen solo my opinion might change when i see it like you have but in general it's it's almost my opinion is make them i would like them to make them so i have the option i'm not paying any money for them unless i want to i wish the movie was called lando and i wish it was more about him because never once was i like man i need han solo's story the only thing I wanted to know about Han Solo, and this is going to be weird because I'm a huge, huge Star Wars fan.

I don't think Han Solo is that cool. I think he's got some sweet moves. But my favorite thing about Han Solo and the biggest allure is like, how did this human shoot the, like, when Luke Skywalker said to Obi-Wan, he was like, tell me about my papa. said to obi-wan he's like tell me about my papa obi-wan chooses to refer to darth vader as or anakin as your father was the best jedi pilot he wasn't like damn that boy the lightsaber he's the only jedi that i ever knew that fuck the bitch he was like he's the best pilot that's what he chose to say about his father which is so interesting and then if you take anakin he won the pod race and then he shot up a blue uh a trade federation ship as a kid and then in episode four he's got the sickest fucking tie fighter ever

and he is like a sith at the top of he is the best but this fucking dude with a fucking dog man sitting shotgun drives up to the scene and shoots darth Darth Vader out of the sky. That is the best thing about Han Solo. That is the coolest thing about Han Solo, that he went in there and he shot Darth Vader out of the sky in this piece of junk, and that's the best Jedi pilot? I could listen to you talk about Star Wars all day. You make it more interesting

than watching the movies makes it. I was excited because I was like, why, how, why does, what I want from this movie is, why does Chewbacca hang out with this loser? Why does this 200-year-old legendary Wookiee warrior hang out with this lowlife? I'm curious. And what I wanted from The Last Jedi and what I wanted from Episode 7 was I wanted Kylo. Wouldn't it be cool if Kylo embraced more of his Han Solo?

He's Han Solo's son. So he's the grandson of the best Sith pilot ever but also the son of the best pilot that somehow shot down the best Sith pilot ever Kylo Ren has to be the best flyer he's got to be the best pilot and I thought it would be cool if Kylo Ren also carried a blaster with him because Han Solo always trusted a good blaster more than a lightsaber or a hokey magic and stuff. And I thought it would be so cool if Kylo had, like, a blaster and if, you know, Snoke talked down to him, if he had, like, a little, like, backtalk Han Solo style. Like, he's Han Solo's kid and they didn't show that enough. And I really like Kylo Ren.

Kylo Ren is much stronger than Darth Vader, by the way. In Episode 7, he freezes that bolt. Remember when they shoot that bolt? He freezes it. Darth Vader, by the way. In Episode VII, he freezes that bolt. Remember when they shoot that bolt? He freezes it. Darth Vader's never done that. In Empire Strikes Back, he blocks a bolt with his hand, but that's a metal hand. I thought the lore was that, and I haven't seen, I know of the four of us by far the least about Star Wars. I thought the thing was that Darth Vader was like the tippity top of Jedis.

Like nobody comes close to him. Luke Skywalker was that Darth Vader was like the tippity top of Jedi's. Like nobody comes Luke Skywalker was stronger than Darth Vader. Okay, but was like Vader like number two? Why wasn't the Emperor stronger than Darth Vader and was Yoda not stronger than him? No, it's a power of mind is important and once Darth Vader realized he's stronger

than the Empire, he picked his frail ass up and body slammed him into the Death Star. Like, once he realized it, once that aspect of mind control was gone because the dark side is blinding, and he picked him up and tossed him over, it's like, that's how much stronger he truly was. So I saw it through a different

lens. I mean, you're right, that's what happened. But to me, I'm like, you know who really beat the Emperor? Time. Time beats everyone. And eventually the Emperor was on top of his his game because time wins. They just get stronger though. Yeah. I see what you're saying.

But in exchange for immortality, which his master was all about becoming immortal, like you exchange, like you die inside. You die visually. Like he wasn't actually that old man. He became that for embracing the dark side and the more you embrace it the more like wretched you become but like the emperor was was strong there he was very strong like he was as strong as he's ever been you know what i mean he was stronger then than when he was fighting yoda you know what i mean okay at least that's the way i saw it and i i think it was just like a matter of vader being like yo i'm fucking darth

vader fuck this old dude you know pick his ass up and throw him in the garbage but like it's because luke beat vader there and then luke didn't let the mind control take over him you know he threw his lightsaber to the ground he was like fuck it i'm not going to kill my dad which is that was people's biggest issue with the the last jedi was because they're like why would he throw his lightsaber down not kill his dad when he was darth vader but he was going to kill his nephew when he was sleeping that makes no sense and that's why people were annoyed because like why would the new movie show luke skywalker's lowest point when we felt we were past the lowest point you know who annoyed me mark hamill mark hamill annoyed me. Mark Hamill came out all over the place saying,

this movie's going to suck, guys. It's not the movie you're looking for. I don't do crazy fucking triple flip lightsaber. Mark Hamill, your time has passed. Don't act like this isn't how Jedis behave. Name a Jedi that hasn't freaking hidden obscurity for ages. Yoda hidden obscurity for ages.aking hidden obscurity For ages Yoda hidden obscurity for ages Luke hidden obscurity for ages

There's another one I'm not thinking of Who hidden obscurity Hidden obscurity for ages And he's like I can't believe That I would play a quitter Jedi All Jedis are quitters they hide that's what they fucking do All the time you're just mad Because the show wasn't about Mark Hamill

You wanted the last Jedi To be mad because the show wasn't about mark hamill you wanted the last jedi to be all about you well he did come out i don't care his time has passed his time has passed he's out there doing interview after interview saying this is this movie's not very good you won't like it he redacted a lot of that i will tell you the end of the last jedi that move that he does to me like i know people hated the last jedi right at the beginning because he took the lightsaber and tossed it. But in Empire Strikes Back, you know, everyone talks about like, oh, Luke, I am your father. That's the best reveal ever. Before I watched Star Wars, I already heard that line a million times.

So I didn't get that reveal. I didn't get that. You know, I knew who Yoda was. I knew who Darth Vader was. But I watched it like, you know, years ago and I tried to put myself in the position of what if i watched a new hope in theaters and i was like this world is crazy where are they going with this and so i i went and i looked up i tried to find old theories from episode four people going into empire strikes back and i read this article the guy was like they released a picture of this man named boba fett standing behind darth vader apparently he's a silent bounty hunter

one can only assume that he might be luke skywalker's father and at the right time he will reveal himself and kill darth vader and it's like damn that boy got it wrong but he was thinking and he was trying to imagine who could be luke's father so when you get to empire strikes back you've seen darth vader with a lightsaber like that guy's a badass you've seen obi-wan and you're like this old man stood up against that what is that dude a robot or something with a fucking lightsaber and he fought him and then he disappeared jedis are the coolest things in the world who are jedis jedis must be the coolest guys and then you find out luke's going to train with master yoda the greatest jedi warrior and you're

like this is gonna be fucking awesome this guy must be his dad maybe or maybe this guy's gonna be jacked or maybe he has like two lightsabers or a lightsaber gun you're thinking all this shit and then you get to to that place and the first thing you see is yoda and he's like and you're like i don't want to see this show me the fucking jedi warrior and luke's like leave me alone i want to see i'm here to see master yoda he's like master yoda i'll take him to you and and you're like okay take him fuck i don't want to see your idiot ass take us to fucking master yoda and then luke's like i want to see him he's a great jedi warrior and then yoda gets so serious and he's like wars do not make one great and if you take that and then you take ray bringing him the lightsaber and being like here you go this this

lightsaber doesn't make the jedi being a jedi, when Yoda was general, uh, Yoda. And he was all about like, you know, controlling, uh, well, he was all about controlling the army and all that.

And then like, that's when he got duped. That's when the empire bested him when he was so focused on war and being general Yoda, he should have been Jedi master Yoda. And he wasn't. And that's when he's like, wars don't make one great.

And he's like, what are you talking about? And he's like, I'm master Yoda. then he lifts an x-wing out of the water the idea of a lightsaber in the face of lifting an x-wing out of the water when you're a little fucking green gremlin that's the power of the force that's a Jedi Master I promise you Yoda doesn't have his lightsaber with him in that cave to protect himself What the fuck is a lightsaber in the face of the force? So when he got that lightsaber in last year he tossed that shit because Jedi's don't value possessions We're like put that that lightsaber killed this guy and killed that guy and whatever but Jedi's don't value

possessions like that and the most Luke didn't realize he was like the Jedi books and What's that? He valued luke didn't realize he was like the jedi books and what's that he valued the books didn't he am i crazy yes he was he went he did he did he was he was so contradictory he was like the sacred jedi tax and he was like the jedi must end and then like and like you know 40 minutes later he's like i am not the last jedi you know he was definitely lost and that's what people didn't like about him they wanted luke to have his shit figured out. But it's like, wait, you knew Luke from the ages of 22 to 25. You've seen him interact with 12 different people and have 18 different conversations.

You think you know this guy 35 years later? He's a human. But the best part about him being a human is we went into that movie being like, Luke Skywalker's a god. He's going to take three Star Destroyers and fucking smash them together and kill all these people and then it's like but wait is that a jedi move there are people like finn on those ships good people that were indoctrinated should luke just murder them all because they're they're following orders like it's not right should luke take a lightsaber and kill all these people no what he does is he doesn't even light a lightsaber. He doesn't even actually go there. And he uses the Force to trick a very powerful

Sith or Ren or whatever, Master of Knights of Ren, whatever Kylo is, he tricks him into things there and he does it in the most pacifist way possible. That was a Master Jedi to me.

Not even being there and letting his friends escape and getting in the mind of his enemy because that's how the Empire did it. He blinded everyone. He was able to manipulate them all. Now Luke got under Kylo's skin. He didn't even have to go there to do it. That was maximum Jedi to me. But we saw in the movie, Luke is just a human.

He almost killed his nephew. Except at the end of the movie kids are playing with luke skywalker toys going master jedi luke skywalker shoots down the ship and he's playing with it that's us that's what we do those kids now in the star Wars universe after episode 8 are exactly us they look at Luke Skywalker as a god and they're going to play with poise of him but we know the truth he's just a human he's just a human and he's a master Jedi

and he was able to do all this stuff without a lightsaber and the lightsabers nonsense compared to the force because the power of the force made Luke Skywalker a god but he's not really a god he's a human but everyone in that galaxy thinks he's a god because he stood down the first order by himself like i i love where they went you know what the craziest thing in the last jedi was was when it was my last thing my last thing i'm never bring a star with me never do that in the last jedi when kylo looks at ray after the coolest scene in the movie where they beat up all those people, and he looks at Rey and he's like, join me.

When that happened, I was like, what the fuck is Star Wars going to do if she takes his hand? Who's the bad guy? Where do we go from here? What's it going to be? This is so insane. And then she was like, no. And he was like, okay. And I'm like, okay.

So the bad guys still wear black. The Jedis are still the good guys it's pretty much black and white as it always was which was the my biggest issue it was with the film was it was like forget everything you know forget everything you know forget everything you know kill the past if you have to wait no the jedis are still here the bad guys still wear black and it's the exact same thing as how we left it and it was like well why don't we go through all this crazy shit if we're gonna end up where we were and i understand we were building stepping stones for the characters but anyways you know what was really cool right was when po ran to his ship and i was like oh damn po who had the coolest scene in in the force awakens he

i don't know if you see it but it's shoots down 16 TIE Fighters in five seconds. It happens in the background of one scene when Finn's like, that's one hell of a pilot. He shoots down like 16 TIE Fighters in a second and you're like, oh, this is the sickest pilot ever. And then it's like, yo, but this is the grandson of Darth Vader and the son of Han Solo. They're about to go head to head

and then Kylo blows up his ship before he even gets in. You're like, Kylo, you motherfucker! Taylor, what's going on in the world of hockey? Yeah, take this. I just want to do Chiz's joke. I remember the last time we were on, I was like, yo, Kylo, you watch Star Wars?

And you're like, nah. Chiz goes, this is a Patton Oswalt-like filibuster. This is a Sparks and Rex scene. I'm sweating. I have to start realizing that there's been a disturbance in the force. I've been all out JJ Abrams thinking something better. Then he starts to assemble the team of Marvel Universe. No, not the second tier superheroes.

I'm sorry, but Hawkeye and Black Widow, we're not first tier. You're not getting in. Can we go find who? Spider-Man. I'm just reading it Hawkeye and Black Widow, we're not first tier. You're not getting in. Can we go find who? Spider-Man. Spider-Man. I'm just reading it right now. Exactly. That's a hilarious episode.

I haven't seen the most recent two Star Wars, but I've seen the first six movies many, many times each. And I've seen all of the Clone Wars. And I love the lore and the idea of Star Wars. But in practice, it fails for me on a lot of levels. I don't know. I think you'd like Rogue One. Huh? Rogue One is good.

I think you'd like Rogue One. I like Rogue One. Rogue One's probably the best Star Wars movie ever made, in my opinion, that I've seen. I liked it better than any of the six original movies. It definitely felt like its own class. And that's what sucked about the solo thing to your initial point is that solo movie didn't need to happen i'm not surprised no one cared but rogue one was awesome why do we miss out on that why do we miss out on another

one a boba fett movie which would have been cool yeah it was pretty good um the uh i don't know i just feel like like the idea of it is better than what it actually is when I go back and watch the movies. I'm more of a Star Trek guy. It's not like they're mutual. Oh, bro, I love Star Trek. No, here we go.

Yeah, don't get me started. The thing you just did with Star Wars, I could go on a fucking rant on the Star Trek thing and talk about it. All right, but after that, you have to let me go with Lord of the Rings. Well, I like Lord of the Rings, and I don't know enough. I like when people tell me, like when people read The Silmarillion and they tell me stuff of Lord of the Rings, I'm like, sounds cool as fuck. The Silmarillion is like, it's honestly like the ramblings of a madman

who's lost himself in his own world. I heard. That's why people recommend not being the first. And then also, here's a thousand years before that happened and what the elves were doing. And then, like, the next chapter will be like, oh, but we can't forget, like, what the dwarves, like, oh, and the thing about how they, like, hammered Armour. And it's like, no wonder his family had, like, an intervention with him. Like, J.R.R. Tolkien, you need to, please.

They're like, daddy, stop making up elven scriptures. I'm working on my fifth language. It's like, you can to, please. They're like, Daddy, stop making up Elven scriptures! I'm working on my fifth language. It's like, you can just make sounds! People will believe you! They're not going to make sure they're real. Just let Elves and Dwarves speak. For me, I was never a fan of Star Trek. I always felt like you had to choose one of the other, Star Wars

or Star Trek, but then that J.J. Abrams trailer for the Captain Kirk one, the reboot, or the other universe. Really good. And it started off with that, like, he's in that car, racing as a kid, and the future cop's trying to pull him over. And he's like, my name's James Tiberius Kirk. I was like, damn, you know what?

Let me give Star Trek a chance. The Tarantino Star Trek movie has me so interested. Me too. It is not in the same universe as these movies we've been watching. This is not the Chris Pine universe. You know why? No. Because I heard that this Quentin Tarantino one

will have Patrick Stewart in it. Ooh, that'd be sick. I love Patrick Stewart. I didn't like the original series. I tried to watch it. It's cheesy. It's pretty rough. I've seen every episode of it, but The Next Generation is... Personally, I like Deep Space Nine

best. I think it's the best written show and it has the best character development, but I really love it. This is with the female pilot, female captain, right? No, it's the one with the black captain. Black guy, Cisco? Yeah. Oh, Voyager's the girl. Yeah.

Yeah, I... For me, the Star trek thing was like i was like oh i told my buddy i was like oh original series having a hard time and even the uh next generation took time for me to get into it but i was telling my buddy i'm like i want to get into it he goes if you want to get into it he goes go read about the prime directive and i read about the prime directive and i was like and then i watched the movie first contact and i was like oh i'm like this is so real deal it's the whole idea that you can't interfere with the society's natural progression because you'll destroy their evolution by doing such a thing in a way so no matter what under any circumstances like kill yourself before you ever

reveal yourself and i like that and that helped me and i always found it interesting also reading about patrick stewart when he got the call to be a captain for star trek he was like what the fuck are they tripping he's like i'm like a middle-aged bald dude why will i be like a young dashing captain like flash gordon he thought i was gonna fail he didn't even get a place in hollywood he like he's like renting a place he's like exactly i was still had a job yeah well it's so cool is that everyone came to the show believing that it was going to be campy by like the original series yeah but then picard walks in like training like an actual like like navy captain like a real like military aspect like super great posture mentality and like

discipline and his whole the way he was was dead serious and it was exactly how he thought a captain would be and he came out the first day and started to like work his lines and everyone on the cast was like okay uh no let's do it that way let's do it like that let's be real deal and it went from campy to that because of his his input essentially even for sure the earl gray tea and the whole shakespeare like that's all patrick stewart's input and yeah i don't know i think that character is so badass i like it i you should i don't know if you've seen all of deep space nine but um no cisco is is so so like when q would show up c Cisco's more hardcore he's more emotional and more violent like Q shows up

and Picard negotiates with him and plays little mind games with him Q shows up to Cisco Cisco fucking punches him in the face he's like Picard never hit me he's like I'm not Picard there's a part where there's a situation where

there's like rebels on a planet and um there's like a there's a situation where like there's like rebels on a planet and they're like dealing with a maki and and cisco's like talking to wharf he's he's like load up two like radioactive torpedoes right now and he's like ready to go sir he's like fire him at the planet he's like the planet won't be inhabitable for 50 years sir fire it just destroys the whole planet. And the rebel leader's like, you just destroyed our whole planet! He's like, yes, and you better evacuate right away or all your people are going to die

within like six hours. It'll be irreversible. He's like, and now we're going to every star system that your people live in, and we're going to destroy every planet that you people have unless you turn yourself in right now. And he's like, I'll never turn myself in. He's like, Mr. Worf, load two more torpedoes all right all right god damn it you know kid do you guys know who who q is yeah yeah okay so q is just like this super omnipotent he only looks like a human for

our sake but he's so beyond us that he just games with us constantly he's so powerful that i was like damn if i knew how to draw comics really well i would draw a comic of thanos snapping his hand and then in the next scene q being right next to him just holding one of the stones being like not so fast just because q is like that level people like thanos with the gauntlet i'm like even with the gauntlet like q could fucking handle that shit. Where's Q in all this? Maybe just watching? They never defined a limit to Q's powers. They're just anything he wants.

I don't think there is a limit. He's just omnipotent, omniscient. His only flaw is... He's cool. That's what I love about Picard. Picard sits down and he's like, damn it, Q! One of my favorite scenes in all star trek is when he got uh data to laugh like he i guess he was genuinely grateful for the way data treated him when he didn't have power or something like that and he's like i'm gonna give you this gift and data starts busting out laughing can't stop it's hilarious and it's just like wow that's a joy that would mean so much to Data.

It's a good scene. Measure of a Man is one of the greatest TV episodes of all time ever. It's the one where Picard goes on trial defending Data as saying he is a human. Data's on trial, and Riker is the prosecution because he's the only high-ranking officer there. And Picard is his defense team. And this Starfleet scientist wants to disassemble Data and try to replicate what he is. Because he's the only one.

He's the only one that worked or whatever. But the act of doing that might destroy Data. It most likely will. And so they have this trial, and it's super heavy. And at the end of it, Data's having a party because he wins and he gets to stay in Starfleet and reicher's not there and he's like sir why aren't you at the party he's like i don't feel like i deserve to be there he's like but if you hadn't served the prosecution i believe i would have been found guilty and they'd have just taken me

apart he's like yes that's true he's like well then you most of all deserve to be there and it's just like oh you know you know how like in x-men they're always like uh oh mutants are humans too yeah what's funny is if you have a doll like i collect figures like so for example this is uh a human it's a doll it's a human if you sell this figure you have to pay a tax for it because it counts as a doll any toy of a human is a doll no matter what if you get uh i actually don't have a mutant thanos isn't a mutant but x-men and marvel marvel didn't want to pay that doll rate that tax so they went to court and argued that mutants are not humans yeah and actually won yep so they don't have to pay that doll tax but it's funny because like god forbid the mutants ever happen we've already set precedence with this debate and the mutants

lost in our world dude if some if some race of people shows up that can freeze you or throw fireballs on the spot, they're calling the shots. You know what? This is America, and thank God we still got our guns. We're going to be able to freeze these fucking bullets. That's that badass scene if you want to watch that, or we could call

it a show because it's like four hours It is past midnight for me right now. I should go to bed me, too I don't think I've ever had such a great time with you guys on this shit. Yeah, it was a lot of fun Hey, you should you should watch that scene, you know, it's like five minutes. It's it's excellent It'll sell you on watching deep space 9. I Put on deep space 9 I put on this is almost Cisco. I've seen quite a bit of it It's just that I always end up rewatching next generation, but I'm it's on Netflix. I put on this. This is the one with Cisco. I've seen quite a bit of it. It's just that I always end up re-watching Next Generation, but it's on Netflix. I'll put it on.

Yeah, for sure. Pimp yourself, man. For people to go to see it. You've got a new podcast. You've got a lot of stuff going on. Tell everybody what you've got. Yes. I have a podcast.

I expect each of you to come on individually, each on your own episode as well of my podcast, please, and another one as well where all three of us all four of us get together and do it um it's called fanboy with harley moranstein f-a-n-b-o-i and actually shit it's all the things that i couldn't stop talking about now that much just games anime wrestling star wars star trek all that shit that like you would literally get beat up in high school star wars star trek all that shit that like you would literally get beat up in high school forever demonstrating any sort of love for in the 90s like if you're like star trek's awesome and i read comic they'd be like kick his ass boys like that's what the podcast is about it's just fanboy with harley morenstein i can get it on cast box or itunes wherever you guys get podcasts it'll be

except on youtube i don't it's not there but yeah fanboy with Harlan Morse. Check it out. It'll be great. You guys owe me. Each of you owe me five podcasts. Yeah, I'm down. We'll have a Lord of the Rings show. I would love to. I could talk Star Trek for hours.

Each one of you. I'm going to have Lord of the Rings talk. Then we're going to have a Star Trek talk. Then Woody, I could do Star Wars going to have a Star Trek talk, and then Woody... I could do Star Wars. I could do Star Trek. I can't hang with Taylor on Lord of the Rings, but I have read the books. Me neither.

Me neither. There may be a session on that one. But still, yeah, check it out, guys. The first one launches this Thursday. Awesome. I'll definitely check that out. Oh, no! Today's Wednesday, but Saturday goes live. Okay. first one launches this thursday awesome when is this is thursday oh no today's wednesday okay and also check out pizza in a bag any walmart walk on in and grab it it's already out all right pk broke up did you say pizza in a bag oh yeah i told everybody to

check that out i think my thing's frozen You're good now Alright, you're good now Okay, PKA episode 391