Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #397

Episode Date: August 3, 2018

On this week's PKA, our pal from The Smoking Tire, Matt Farah is back! With tons of great discussions revolving around automobiles, then Woody responds to Ice Poseidon's challenge for a boxing match against the PKA host, then we pop on over to have a good chuckle at the latest happenings from the "Who Is America?" Showtime show and we cap things off by discussing the latest happenings in our friend Boogie2988's life.

Painkiller Ready, episode 397 with our guest Matt Fair, aka The Smoking Tire. Kyle? Double sponsors tonight, Dollar Shave Club and Postmates, which I love so much. We'll get to those guys later on the show, but yeah, let's get right into it. Dude, first topic. We will do Connor talk? Is that what we're going to kick off with? I'd like to learn about cars and Connor, because I didn't know it was so common for celebrities to

pretend to own cars maybe that reveals me for a rube but I didn't know no it's not a rube thing it's that that particular system is working exactly as it's designed to work frankly I only know

it because I'm in the industry and the same the same nice folks when I Hi guys, by the way, thanks for having me on the show again Hey there, Max Just fucking dive right into this one Yeah, so there's fleets of cars in most major cities and some cities have big fleets

some cities have small fleets but they're fleets that manufacturers have designated both automotive journalists like myself and celebrities like conor mcgregor or any a lot of a lot of other people a lit almost any a-list celebrity you could think of truly just advertising like yeah i mean it's you remember that scene in uh the scene in uh blow you know actors and musicians actors and musicians you know what i mean like somebody saw that and went yeah you know i i know um i met jason statham once who was the you know i don't know if i mentioned the last one was

a long time ago but he was the manliest person you can imagine um you know and i met and he was driving uh an audi that was for audi it was like for a transporter two or something at the time but yeah like so there's two separate like the same building there's a warehouse right like there's a bunch of them around town and there's a bunch of cars in there and they have manufacturer license plates on them and there's a fleet of people there and their job is to get the press cars to the press people like me and the what they call marketing cars to the marketing people and uh marketing people get those cars placed into auto shows get those cars stuck in uh malls sometimes you'll see

that and get uh celebrities driving them for either short or longer term loans yeah that's what i wanted to ask about if i'm a celebrity let's just say i'm conor mcgregor because that's what we're talking about massive sports star maybe the biggest in the world how long do i get to keep this lambo this rolls royce whatever like is this for the weekend or am i like totally back in a month it totally depends like it it's a totally individual thing like it's there's for me when i test a car as an automotive journalist the kind of gold standard is a week but like a week that's by design it's like all right that's enough time to like do a bunch of stuff with the car and make your video or do whatever you know if if it's for a celebrity it depends like do they live in la and

is it like here's a car you know they're they'll have a long term um i don't think it's a secret i'm friends with uh scott eastwood just i'm just dropping fucking names like oh wow that's good old scotty yeah scott is we're all friends with scott you don't know who scott eastwood is he's clint's kid of course not i don't know he looks just well eastwood can't figure that out looks just Eastwood to cue you in. Can't figure that out. Clint Eastwood's... Now we're talking about this. Clint Eastwood's firm is so

goddamn manly and strong that it didn't use any of his wife's DNA. It just cloned him and made Scott Eastwood. Remember when he screamed at a chair? Yes. Get out of here. That was brilliant.

It was not. That explains why he was widely mocked. Oh, man. He's the nicest guy ever. And he records a podcast in my studio. He uses my studio to record his show. This guy is insanely good looking. It's really, you can't hang out with him.

He makes me hate myself christ i know i it's it's really he's too handsome and it's very bothersome what an asshole carry on it seems like it really seems like he only has fun in life too like it's it's but we love him uh but anyway uh bmw just gave him a five series for a year because he's Scott Eastwood. Just for him to drive around LA and just occasionally he'll be photographed in it by whoever. Life works for me like that. If you do well enough, they just start throwing more good shit at you. Hell yeah, bro.

Hell yeah. If you're rich enough and you're so deep into could buy anything you want, you just start getting shit for free. Is this guy even in movies? I don't know. you're so deep into could buy anything you want you just start getting shit for free so is this guy even in movies i don't know in professional wrestling there is this notion of the mark and the smart mark right and i've always liked being this smart mark the guy who follows it the guy like a mark just gets fooled by all the things he thinks the rock is actually mad at the undertaker or whatever the fuck is going on in wrestling the smart mark knows that there are contract disputes in the background and they're setting up this other guy to be champion because he's going into movies or whatever.

Like in MMA, I always fancy. So the smart fan cares about the script writing. Yes. Yeah. In wrestling. Yeah. The smart mark.

Yeah. In MMA, I always liked being the smart mark. I know whose contracts are expiring, who used to train together, which rivalries are real, which rivalries are being drummed up so they can get people to watch. I felt like a regular mark when I learned that Conor McGregor's wealth is not real, or at least parts of it. You know what's funny about that? You know, I don't, I, you know, what's funny about that is I, the funniest thing about Conor McGregor pretending to own Rolls Royces is that his wealth is very real.

He could easily have some of it. Yeah, I know. Of course. Well, didn't, I mean, he made money on those fights, right? That wasn't like completely bullshit, right? He could buy one if he wanted. He could definitely buy a Rolls Royce. I mean, maybe he couldn't buy a Gulfstream five, but he buy a rolls-royce like that's not beyond it and and i i know a lot not

a lot i know a few very very wealthy people that wear fake stuff and that fake floss because nobody will come close to questioning it because they can so obviously afford it anyway. And so that's just, you know, who could blame Connor? He's a, he's a, he is like the most extroverted human being on the fucking planet. Who can blame him

for semi-fake flossing roles while he's in town? I don't blame him at all. Yeah, I wouldn't care. It's not like he's just driving around trying to drum up some publicity. He's driving into one of the Mayweather

deals or whatever. One of those conferences. It's just smart. Don't buy it if they'll just fucking give you one. I think it's more borrowing one to be way better than buying one. I think it's more baller to way better than buying one i think it's more baller to have to be like i'm such a fucking pimp that uh that rolls royce just gives me shit

exactly exactly and i mean to say that he's borrowing it is is almost like not accurate it's like oh i didn't go and like beg for this they came to me they probably did we're tired of you driving that lamborghini you're making us look bad don't you want a rolls royce i would have liked that storyline yeah but but it pops the bubble a little bit when he's like this is my rolls and it's not no there was two he said i got this one for business and i got the other one for business that was the caption on the Instagram post. It was really funny, actually, to see the scene. Because it's a parade of Rolls Royces you see driving down Main Street in Santa Monica. It was very funny. I can't believe we're talking about this again.

I'll go the other way with it. I'll give you both sides. The Venetian Hotel, Valet, Las Vegas, in Rolls. I mean a fleet fleet. Like 8 lambo ferrari roll just roll in and all of them have across the back written written in what looked like those fake like uh like the fake mercedes lettering that people buy at auto zone and do like fake AMG badging on their shit, but it's written Money Mayweather. It's written across the back of all the

cars, and that's how they roll around like that with Money Mayweather written on the back of all these cars that he has taken massive Well, I mean like, Floyd, you know, say what you will about him, can't read, he can probably understand numbers, but I'm sure he's never done anything like buy an $18 million watch right no never jacob you guys see that shit yeah yeah

i just linked it there oh man this link says he did buy an 18 million dollar watch yeah you know who that watch was commissioned for was um who sold it to him was uh flavio Briatore. You know that guy? No. He's like a European captain of industry. He owned a Formula One team and just banged supermodels and has this crazy fucking yacht. And he's like if Sergio Berlusconi wasn't the president. Like that. Basically that.

You know? Oh, okay. Like that. Basically that. You know. Oh, okay. And that guy had the watch commissioned and sold it to Mayweather. I do a podcast about watches called Watch and Listen. That's why I know that shit. I watched you talk about watches with Joe Rogan. I was impressed. Bro, you know how good Joe Rogan is for business?

Joe Rogan. I love Joe Rogan. He is so good for business. I did Joe Rogan. I talked about my grand joe rogan let's talk about that five minutes right i talk about this watch for five minutes i got a letter from the ceo of grand seiko was like thank you so much for spreading the word about grand seiko like i talk about this watch i like i idolize these people they can make something i'm just like yeah right and. And I got

thank you letters from two different people from shit I just mentioned on Joe Rogan. And I got like the followers were like and never went down. Never went down. Amazing. He really is like the internet kingmaker in a way.

So good for business. His viewership beats the fuck out of anyone in traditional radio beats the fuck out of any uh cable tv show like when you see the ratings released they're like oh hannity got like all like three million and rachel maddow got like 2.5 and then you know uh cooper got 900 000 and joe, oh, yeah. Well, what did we get last month, Jamie? All right, 128 million. 128 million. And it's like he blows them out of the water so hard. Like every time I watch his show and it's like a relatively unknown person, that person will be like tweeting all day because I'll follow him just to see.

And they'll be like, oh, my God, this is unreal. This is crazy. Like I didn't know so many people cared. It's like, yeah, when you reach a critical mass of that many listeners little obscure topics i heard i heard ron white you know the comedian ron white like amazing career comedian blue collar comedy tour the guy has a jet okay he i heard him say a year ago that he's never gotten a response to anything he's ever done like going on joe rogan a guy with a fucking jet from telling folks that's and this is the best gig he's ever done come on that's crazy but i got a massive spike big fucking jump and uh anyone whose name

i dropped was so appreciative and i think the stupid youtube video did like a million in 24 hours it was so crazy it was so crazy yeah as speaking of conor mcgregor the the i guess there's a deal the court agreed to drop both of the felony charges against him and in exchange he pled guilty to one misdemeanor count of disorderly conduct he was disorderly we need to make an example of these irish invaders he's got to do a couple days of community service attend an anger management course pay for the damage he did to the bus who cares honor the terms of uh he's got some protective orders uh served against him two of which were given to him from mich Chiesa and Ray Borg.

So basically, not even a slap on the wrist. The real slap was his legal fees, right? He's like, ah, it cost me a couple hundred grand, but eh, nothing happened. Maybe I'll do it again. That's a gift like a free fucking Rolls Royce, bro. That's a gift. He might do it again. That's the sort of, what if he came out and did it again?

He doesn't give a shit. That's all that's going to happen. Isn't it crazy, especially in corporate crime right now, the penalties are such bullshit that people just go, yeah, just pay it. Just go. You know what I mean? The penalty to dump some nasty chemical in the water is like $5 million

and they're going to make $100 million. They just go, yeah, just fucking dump it. Just go. And the penalty is corporate, right? The penalty is this publicly traded corporation. All the prizes that came before that were private. Your bonus gets to stay with you. There's never a court-ordered pay your bonus back penalty.

Oh yeah, you know who gets fucked are all the people who just happen to have stock in this company. And the ducks that are covered in fucking oil and flapping around. I don't care about the ducks. There are plenty. I don't either. As Jim Norton says, if you are a duck and you get covered in oil,

you are an asshole. You have the gift of flight. You can land anywhere. You do not need to land in that oil. You were just being a curious little buzzard and you couldn't stay away. No sympathy. Fish, I can feel. No, I don't feel bad for fish either. You can just swim it somewhere else Lee oh It's a good joke. It's a hard to laugh at it, but it's a really good It's true well

This is you were a fish in the ocean and you saw a bunch of oil sitting there Would you go this doesn't look like any of the water I've swam through before. I'm going to turn around. Or would you go, let's forge ahead. It looks delicious. Well, there's a lot of dead fish in front of me, but I'm going to be the exception. Kyle, what's awesome that you're saying that? Well, this whole decision for Conor, this means that

the fight can totally happen this year. I see that Habib's people want the fight to be in November. Conor's people want it to be in October. Seems like they should be able to come together, figure out something in the middle. I believe nothing. He didn't fight before he threw a dolly at a bus.

Like, until he makes weight, fuck. Oh my god, this sport's making me crazy. I'm as big an MMA fan as you'll find. I follow it. Every day I read about it and check on it and listen to all the fighters' podcasts and that nonsense. But my God, it's hard to be a fan of.

They miss weight half the time, it seems, on the bigger fights or get hurt. It just doesn't happen. I'm so disillusioned lately. Eh, you know, shit happens. I'm fine with that. I liked, you know, Cormier won his fight. That was brilliant.

I'm really looking forward to this now. I hope to get the numbers worked out. I really want to see that fight. It'll be one of the greatest... They do those hype videos at the UFC. It'll be one of the best of all time. I'm looking forward to that. And then Chiz is for Brock vs. DC.

That one will happen. It's not like anybody's going to miss weight on that shit, right? I think everybody can make 265, right? Brock's got a cut for 265. I know he does, but the real fear would be... I know he recently got tested. He's in the USADA pool, and he gave his first sample recently. I hope he comes clean through the whole thing.

I really want to see that fight. There's a lot of big fights that I want to see um the uh the uh cody garbrandt fight i did cormier is only like 5 11 and so lesnar's got like five inches on him or something oh yeah it's not like more did you see cormier in the ring when brock pushed him yes brock pushed dc and dc went flying like he was woody's gamer tag or something like it was ridiculous yeah he just he gave him a hard shove remember the the pkn topic where the the guy got the hard shove before the shooting it was like that and dc went back like 11 feet like like that should be his opening move in the fight because that was just a just a double-handed push Yeah yeah with the lead

But dude Chiz has it linked I think I can share it with everyone Yeah it was pretty cool I'm looking forward to that I just paused it immediately and from the half a second clip of him running up the stairs I'm talking about Lesnar right now

There's not a man in the entire city he's in who's as large as he is that's probably true walk into any city on earth and be like who's the biggest oh me it's me like yeah all right can we watch this together it'll probably be less than a minute yeah all I'm queued up at 226. Yeah. All right. Ready, set, play. Look at that head. So Brock walks in. It's a giant suit. Watch him push him.

That's a big push. Yeah. I remembered it being even better, but it was a legit push. That was a real push. And you know what it wasn't? It was not a huge push on Brock's behalf. Look at him push the guy with the red jacket. He's knocking that guy out of the way like a fly.

Look, he pushed him back. He didn't do anything. He gave him a courtesy lead back. These red jacket clowns are hilarious. I'd like to see Brock and DC take on like eight of those. That's the real fight. Somewhere in there. Yeah, someone versus like a dozen red jackets.

Yeah. Didn't they used to do that shit? Like didn't Andre the Giant used to fight like six dudes? Can somebody bring that shit back? Yeah, Andre would do all kinds of crazy stuff. How many ushers could Brock Lesnar kill in the ring? All of them. Let's get some gladiators it's time for brock lesnar first 12 volunteer ushers here's my favorite part um you have to watch carefully that wasn't really necessary it happens at 234 so back up a little bit you can watch it on your own but what happens is is Daniel Cormier's – I never get his name right.

His boxing coach. His boxing coach is like five foot nothing. And he decides to take Brock on himself to defend Brock from – Yeah, to defend DC from Brock Lesnar. So for those of you watching, he's this guy. The guy who hits him from the side? Yeah. So if you pause at 223 yeah you can see him standing

there like you know getting on his cell phone or something rogan look tall yeah and then brock gets pushed and he goes in there and goes after brock to like i don't know protect dc it's my favorite part of the move tiny yeah yeah he looks like ronnie from Jersey Shore with no legs. He jumps right in there. He pushes Brock. It does nothing. Brock doesn't notice. He doesn't even look over at him. And then shortly afterwards, Dana White takes the boxing coach.

He's like, no, this isn't for you. Get out of here. I think Brock is the only not bald guy in this whole ring. I'm paused at 243, and there is just a dude in the middle of the frame in a white fucking tuxedo in the ring

holding up his iPhone. That's Bruce Buffer, the announcer. He's filming on an iPhone right now? I know. What is he choosing to do at this moment? iPhones are funny. When he shows his prostitute girlfriend this, it's going to go a long way with his prostitute girlfriend while she's snorting pills off the bedside table.

Right, because prostitute girlfriends aren't a sure thing to start with. Like, oh, this will help me get me laid at this prostitute. You know the old saying, you can turn a hoe into a housewife. Is there something against this girlfriend that I need to be caught up on? No, no, no. He actually frequents prostitutes. And he's sort of like, you know, he's an older gentleman in a world of like athletic sports stars and stuff. Don't fix the one I went with today.

He's got like, he's got fake ab implants. Really? Uh-huh. They're great. And he shows up at. He must live in Vegas, right? Yeah, he shows up at after parties and stuff, literally with a whore on each arm,

like, look what I got, boys. As if money buys that. But I don't know. I guess it's earned in a way. Of course. He makes a 50-kilo night. I was just hanging out earlier last year in October. I'm in Munich at Oktoberfest in Lederhosen with a group of people, one of whom brings hookers to Oktoberfest.

Nice. And the hookers are in Lederhosen shit too. It was amazing. I didn't even know that was a thing one could do. But you can actually bring hookers to Oktoberfest. That's like bringing a snack to dinner. What's the point? Yeah, there's so many drunk chicks there that are looking to do whatever theyers to Oktoberfest that's like bringing a snack to dinner what's the point? there's so many drunk chicks there

that are looking to do whatever they do at Oktoberfest why would you bother? I don't think he wanted to talk to anybody I don't know I still see the logic in it dude I don't know there's a difference between a good chance and a sure thing no but that's what would motivate you is if

you know it's a sure thing you're going to be walking around not really you know engaging with anyone but if you you just know it's a good chance you'll be putting yourself out there working for it it'll be more satisfying than like oh you know i wonder if sapphire and diamond really want to fuck me no they're here because sergey the eastern european pimp says they have to be here or they lose their dad loses another pinky like those are the i knew you're going with that something's being broken that was october fest is it like all the online pictures where it's just streets and streets full, just a bonanza? No, it's actually, it's surprisingly a little different than I expected it, right?

So it's actually like on a big fairgrounds. It's pretty contained. Like you actually, you know, you go in a big thing and you're inside, right? And there's these big houses that are like these semi-permanent buildings arranged sort of parallel like this down a big area, right? And each big house is a brewery, right? And you get a table. Like, you reserve a table, a seat at the house, and that you can only drink, really, in the houses. And you eat all these big – the chickens and the pretzels and all these big steins of beer and these, like, huge German women carrying,

you know, ten steins. It's fucking nuts, right? And it starts at, like, noon, and it's, like, you know, the music is pretty, but it's all kind of mellow. And outside of each tent, like, in the aisles, um, is actually, like, a totally

family-friendly carnival. So it's like kids and carnival rides and games and no drinking, really, except for these little carts where you can just take a shot at a window. That's it. You can't take it with you. You walk up, you pay two euro, shot, walk away.

It's actually quite the system. So they're like more strict than Six Flags with how you can drink outside yeah you can only drink in the houses and so as the but as the day goes on and turns into night the kids go home and everyone just like all of a sudden you know once it gets dark everyone just becomes mega drunk and it's a, people are on tables and singing and like every building is overfilled and it gets

exactly as crazy as you would like it to be. It's not like a blast. There's a thing. Germans have a whole other level of personal responsibility. We don't, there's rides and games you could never do in America. So there's a thing that's like a 40 foot diameter

spinning disc just flat. And a bunch of people pile onto it. And they just start spinning that shit. And it goes faster and faster and people start sailing off into these barriers and sailing off and fucking tumbling

and they fall into other people and everyone falls over and the last person on the thing wins but it's like and then they'll put two drunk people with boxing gloves on this thing, start spinning it and try and have them box each other but they're just falling all over each other

So it's literally that jackass bit dizzy boxing where they spin them around and they have a fight But the whole floor is spinning and fast. It's really fun, actually. The later hose has a pretty good grip when you're on your ass.

Harder than it looks, though. But it's really fun. It goes on for a month. If you get a chance, go. It's really, really worth going. It's really fun. Are you hitting your mic constantly?

No. You are. Sorry. Are you getting all kinds of weird sounds? Non-stop. Really? Yeah, I've been writing it to you. It seems like you didn't see it. Is it your headphone thing dragging into the mic?

Is it this? It is. It's such a thin, tiny little cable. Oh my god, okay. I'm sorry. What can I do about that? I don't know. It's just when you get animated and move around. Which is great.

Hang on. What if now I am picking up my mic? Hang on. What if now I am picking up my mic? Hang on. What if now... How about now? Do you get it anymore? Are you still getting it? Yeah. I'm trying to be very still.

I have to be. That will never work. There's a Jurassic Park 1 dinosaur. I'm not moving anything. I can't believe it. It's like a $3 pair of bullshit headphones I wear while working out. What an disappointment. You've been too likable.

We're giving you a charisma penalty. Yes, that's it. Charisma penalty. Shit. All right. Now we're conscious of it. All right. I've never been to Europe at all.

What? Go. No. No, I'd like to it'd be fun must see cities Munich, Amsterdam Florence Venice Paris

but start with Amsterdam Paris is shitty it's not shitty it's beautiful the architecture is incredible it is just not parisians parisians if you're gonna do france the south of france is better like nice nice is low nice i heard about them in the news a couple years ago yeah yes i don't remember what it was something nice though something about a bus tour who knows oh yeah they had those nice truck tours

you can go on. They don't slow down for anything. They take you all around town. You don't have to worry about traffic. It's great. Yeah. It's the only way to see the city. Quickly with an abrupt ending. Because of terror.

I guess I gotta to fess up to my representative here in Georgia being an absolute buffoon. Perhaps the biggest political moron of all time. Is this the Sacha Baron Cohen guy?

Absolutely. You got the Rob Ford. Congratulations. Oh my god. He is worse than Rob Ford. Congratulations. Oh my God. He is worse than Rob Ford. Rob Ford never did any, he never dropped any end. God rest his soul. God rest his soul.

Uh, this moral seesaw of end bombs versus smoking crack while in office. Where do we put the seesaw? We're okay with the crack. It's not like he had his finger on the, uh, the nuclear launch codes or anything like, like what,

if he gets all cracked up, what's he going to do? Like, oh, the trash collectors are coming on Tuesday now. That guy did not have a crack problem. He was seriously overweight. Yeah. Now that's a good point. That's a good point. Those two are 100% mutually

exclusive. Oh, yeah. Have you ever seen... I'm in the Midwest, so I've seen my fair share. I've never seen a big, barreling... Have you ever seen a rich crackhead, though? A rich crackhead is different. They do cocaine. But not Rob Ford.

Doesn't cocaine make you lose weight, too? It does. Any kind of amphetamine or stimulant is going to suppress your appetite. I present to you Artie Lang. See? But he did heroin. Heroin. My bad. amphetamine or stimulant is going to suppress your appetite. I present to you Artie Lang. See, but he did heroin. My bad. You know when you see those homeless people on park benches where you're like, how's he sleeping like that?

That's heroin. No. I don't know when you see homeless people on... I'm not from St. Louis, Taylor. I don't see that. That's cold as ice. Now that you mention it, N-bombs are worse than crack.

Yes. Yeah, yeah, I think so, especially if you're an elected official. I mean, I couldn't believe this when I watched it. For those of you who haven't seen it, both of you, Showtime has this new show starring Sacha Baron-Conan, the guy who did Borat, the guy who did Ali G, the guy who did Bruno, and those movies and stuff. And it's fucking hilarious. He gets this Georgia representative.

Is he like a state representative? Yeah. He's in the state legislature, I believe. And he's a lawmaker. believe and he's a lawmaker uh now this guy had a history of like like back when the whole confederate uh monument thing was going on there was a black lawmaker and she was like she was for removing these uh these confederate uh memorials and and our boy said she better stop that or she might just end up missing you know so so it kind of sends a death threat. Who's to say what that implication could possibly mean?

Well, that's a good point. Kidnapping is kidnapping explicitly. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I believe in Georgia killing black people still a misdemeanor i'm just saying yeah are we ready so this is five minutes are we i think dude every minute of it's every bit of its gold and i think we can talk we can talk over it okay three two one is everybody ready i know yeah is everybody

ready football out from you like Lucy. Are you ready to watch? Here's a reference everyone gets. Who doesn't get peanuts? Come on, man. Anyone under 40? Really? I feel like... I watched it all the time on the Christmas special.

See? It was on every year. So you get the Lucy moving the football reference? Yeah, I get that. All right. It's like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. I know it was made before my time? Yeah, I get that. All right. It's like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. I know it was made before my time, but it's still around.

All right, ready, set, play. That's quite a brow ridge. I do like that He-Man makeup. Sasha does not look like himself at all. He's like augmented his forehead. Yeah. If you're totally out of the loop, this is Borat. And he does accents and stuff.

And he is posing as like an Israeli security expert. I mean, I was not in the Mossad for 13 years. Oh, that linen blazer. I'm a state of the characters he plays to trick people into being idiots. Yeah, this is a new character. I don't call it a burqa ban. I call it an anti-masking statute. Okay. House Bill 3 would make it illegal for people to conceal their faces in public. I don't call it a burqa ban. I call it an anti-masking statute. Okay, politically correct. Because in order to win in the legal system, you cannot be against the First Amendment.

See, this is how the Muslims in the country are using our First Amendment against them. You have to fight fire with fire. Do you know how to spot the difference between somebody who is a terrorist in a burqa and a normal woman in a burqa? I cannot tell. Of all his characters, this is the most easy to see through.

I don't know, man. If you're there and the cameras are on... The makeup isn't even fucking blended. If you've seen Borat, this accent is so identifiable, the nuances of him being in this accent. He's got the boots. What the hell? Am I looking at upskirts?

Yeah. This is how you tell the difference between a terrorist and a burka. Is there like one pussy lip hanging out in that one? It's a dick? it's a dick? oh jesus I do not know whether this is a woman or a man with an explosive he's gonna use a selfie stick to look under this person with a burka

because the chinese are always taking selfies okay convince him or her that you are Chinese. This is exactly how Mossad does it. Red dragon. Hong Kong. Sushi. He said sushi. Sushi.

Oh, my God. Ho Chi Minh City. He said Ho Chi Minh City. He said Ho Chi Minh City. Chops it. Yeah, this guy should not be in Congress. Not the terrorists. So this is the best part. You could be the victim of kidnapping by ISIS.

You have two seconds to attract attention. How do you attract attention? You start screaming. Take your clothes off. This guy's completely fooled by this character. It is the N-world. This guy is a fucking idiot. He's trying to learn from Sasha Cohen or whatever.

From a guy with clear facial prosthetics on. Nigger! Nigger! Nigger! Oh, it's not gone well. Oh, God. It's Noonie, not this world. So he's screaming nigger to get attention in case of a terror attack.

Did I follow that right that he told him to say the N-bomb and then he screamed it and he goes no no no you say Nudie yeah that's not the N-word that's disgusting the N-word is Nudie why would that draw attention in the middle east

I don't know what Nudie is so now he's teaching him how to use his buttocks to defend against an ISIS kidnapping. Because they believe that if a man's buttocks touches them, they become a homosexual. So he's pulled his pants down and he's ass-rushing. He's ass-rushing Sasha saying, He's got compression underwear on because he's clearly an athletic guy. His legs aren't bad really. He said in the facade, in the facade when you say if you want to win, you show some skin.

So he can now pull his pants and underwear off. I'll touch you! I'll touch you with my back! You wanna win? You show some skin! Drop the bag or I'll touch you! And the ISIS agent will back up without shooting. You have to remind me, if I touch you... While USA, and to quote you, ass-rushing, which is the first time I've ever heard that word spoken. Literally bum-rushing. Bro, I'd feel a lot better about our country if we watched a video of this guy smoking a rock right now.

This is worse than rock i would rather watch any politician smoke crack than rush a man in facial prosthetics with their ass out that is fucking outrageous that is so brutal i'll touch you with my butt i'll make you a homosexual usa how did how did this guy like part of me almost wants to say this guy was in on it because this level of stupidity I can't fathom it. We haven't seen them all so they're releasing it week by week but the

preview is every single person that they worked with comes out looking like an idiot except Bernie Sanders. Except for whatever. I didn't watch the Bernie Sanders one. Does he not really buy it? Well, he just, like, basically, like, one of the guy's techniques is he'll say something,

and then all you have to do is agree with it, and you look like an idiot. And Bernie just didn't do that, like, all the way through. You know, he's like, well, make everybody the 1%. And then, you know, everyone's the 1%. And he's like, no, that's not how that works. That's not, that wouldn't be 1% then. That would be 100%. And just like the whole way through he just never

stopped. He just never didn't do this. He didn't take his pants off and bum rush a guy. I don't know. It's not out yet so we'll see it. I'm very excited for Sarah Palin. He was trying to convince he was trying to get really he was trying to

get dick cheney to say that he shot his friend on purpose and that hunting accident is you know that was on purpose right he's just he's uh he's really good at his job uh i i got their legal team must be the biggest part of this show did you ever listen to there was a show he did and i can't remember if it was the op radio show when it was still on sirius or if it was like rogan or something where he described the the security and legal process of doing bruno where like he had to like fake sodomy on stage and like he could touch a dick but not an asshole and because it was an asshole it was a felony and like and then they had like secret

escape tunnels to get out and they had to like leave the state immediately like be really close to state like the venue they chose was like super close to a state border because of that like it was part of my legal recommendations for my team are our escape routes

i'm gonna go one echelon up on my legal spending like no no you you get me out of this you don't you know build an underground railroad to get me back to california oh the escape route the escape route was because he didn't want to get killed he thought he figured if he like faked gay sex on stage in alabama that the crowd would actually kill him. That was the escape tunnel. And then the leaving the state was to get out of Dodge before the sheriff figured out what the fuck was going on. But it's a very, very funny story. Yeah, he's fucking great.

I really like when he makes people look like absolute imbeciles, absolute fools. And, man, this is his finest work ever. This guy's resigning. He was already on the way out, I believe. He was like a lame duck representative. He'd already been voted out, but he had more term to serve, and I think that he's resigning now.

Did you see the first week? Everything he's voted on. Did you see the first week? When he got the gun person? No. So this is week two. Did you see the first week when he got the gun person? No. Oh, to give to armed toddlers? So this is week two. And you know how they want to put guns in schools with teachers so that the teachers can defend all the kids.

Well, he plays the same Israeli defense expert, but he wants to give guns to the students. That's not a bad idea. Right. They call them the kindergartens. That's a great name yeah yeah so so they actually get like an nra representative and a bunch of like bigger um political people i think mitch mcconnell might or trent lot i'm mixing it up don't hold me to it but you know political names that you would know nationally recognized, to say that they'd agree with this concept of giving guns to kindergartners.

And they take guns and dress them up with stuffed animals, and there's fluffy bunnies on top, and they're like, point the bunny's nose at the bad guy. Bang, bang, bang. And it's pretty great. Yeah.

Yeah, that's fucking hilarious. Yeah, all he had to say, right, was like, we do this in Israel, and they went along with like anything like they just default to the guy because he's israeli that was fucking hilarious yeah i don't doubt that one bit do you you put this these bits kyle you said it was the best stuff you ever did you put this stuff again up against borat and you think it's better? I don't think it's funnier or necessarily better

or more difficult to pull off. But I just think it's absurd that he got this politician to do all of that. To scream the N-word. To pull his pants down and literally bum Russia guys, you said. He got on the phone with Trump or Trump Jr. Do you know who it is?

Oh no, I'm going to be mixing up my comedians stuttering john or something you're right friend called on i did it right yeah you know what i mean sour she can't be able to prank call air force one like this shit is bad but like there has to be some level where it's gonna stop before before that's not a trump thing though because that's just like a politician thing or a washington, because Sour Shoes, who's like this 40 year old autistic man who lives at home with his parents and is very talented. He does. He name a song. He'll start playing it and singing it on the piano. It's crazy. He's obnoxious.

No, he's well, yeah, he is. He's a he's a crazy prank phone caller and he likes annoying people. And he got on the phone with Hillary Clinton and apparently recorded a long conversation with her. The Secret Service comes, and we have never heard that tape. He was very frightened by the Secret Service. The cat bleeped. I think it's... Ow! My hammer keeps falling!

Like with the cloth? Yeah, I don't know. Like with the cloth? Yeah, I don't know. I'd be hard-pressed to think of movies that have made me uproariously laugh out loud more often than Borat. Yeah. Borat in theaters was like real, real crazy crying laughter. You couldn't hear a lot of the movie because people were laughing so hard. Like when he started singing that the only one i remember thing at the rodeo that was hilarious down the well yeah i mean the opening

scene where they're in kazakhstan and they have the running of the jew and he's like crash the jew egg before it hatches crash and all the kids are just feverishly kicking this Jew egg. Like, don't let the Jew out. God, that movie's so fucking good. Fucking great. That movie is so goddamn funny. I heard him on his Stern interview, and he was talking about, like, I don't remember if he was Bruno or who he was dressed up as, but this gay guy, like, gets him in a bathroom stall and, like, is trying to engage with him sexually in some manner and he and he

stays in character even though he's literally pinned in a bathroom stall by a much larger gay man who's trying to rape him and essentially he stays in character and he's miked up so he's just like ah my wife no my wife i cannot and and the the producers have to rush in and like like save him and get him the fuck out of there like he always stays in character which i really admire uh dangerous gig man yeah a lot of the times he's being very provocative in areas of the country where you normally don't want to do that sort of thing well i mean in that case do you think it's more likely that the large homosexual gentleman who wants to have sex with him is going to beat him up if he continues

on with his bit or if he goes hey this is all a joke I'm making fun of you I'm making fun of you subversively and I'm going to air it to the world where'd you get that knife like I think it's much safer to just stay in the bit at that point and say you have AIDS or something

right yeah that's a quick that point and say you have AIDS or something. Right? Yeah, that's a quick one. I have AIDS! I have AIDS! How do you... Oh, well, that's good, because I'm a bug chaser. That's good. So do I. Shit! Mixing Borat and the gay one there, but whatever.

Yeah, that's... I wish that he didn't have to take like a decade between everything off or it seems like he does i'm sure he's like doing a lot of producing and shit because it's just so funny he's very good at what he does he he coaxes people into those terrible positions where to the point of like we all watch and we go oh what an idiot what a retard i mean frankly that video we just watched that was an idiot and a retard and no normal person would fall for that but a lot of the stuff like in borat or bruno i think it would have fooled a lot of us too we're like you're trying to be tolerant and accepting and open and they go a little past the

line you go okay i guess i'm okay i'm here with you now and then he goes a little past that and it's like just like you know a war of a thousand cuts is what he does. He can't go too ridiculous off the bat. It's really impressive. There's a whole movie based around the philosophy that people would rather be polite than save their own lives. They'll get into cars with strangers to be polite and shit like that. There's a whole movie based around that. I'm blanking on what it is now. yeah um yeah i mean when he's at that dinner party and he asked he asked to be excused in the restroom and then he comes back with his shit in a ziploc bag it's like this guy is not pulling

any punches he's going for he's going for the kill with this comedy shit he does not care and then of course his date shows up and she's a 225-pound black prostitute. And this was a lovely dinner party he was attending. It was not the place you bring your two overweight black prostitutes. Yeah, there's like an orthopedic surgeon there and a local pastor. We're circling back to Bruce Buffer again. Yeah. The ones that I've seen Bruce with are always like maybe a little rough, maybe a little older.

But they're not overweight. There's an automotive journalist who has a couple of times brought hookers onto media launches with him and not been shy about the fact that he was doing the new fucking Jetta launch. He just brings this hooker to the hotel

for the weekend. It was pretty crazy. Yeah, it wasn't for a special car. I don't think it was pretty crazy yeah it wasn't for a special car i don't think it was the jetta this was like three years ago i can't recall but it was like a pretty you know why did you celebrate the new taillights on the ford focus well grand reintroduction of the chevy cavalier you know his and there was pictures of the chick like on his his car you know, website. It was crazy.

It was so weird. But it happens. That's funny. It's surprising what people are willing to, like, openly bring hookers to. I'm never really totally that shocked by it. It's interesting. Every industry is different, though. Dude, I don't know.

I'm always surprised whenever I go to like a bachelor party or some of these events that are very male dominated how easily prostitution comes to some people yeah yeah i got i got you know we have no issues here with prostitution no shame come easily to most people if it was legal yes uh yeah nevada it's the world's oldest trade right yeah it's good trade i wonder if it is well women were trading pussy for like an extra ham hock back in the day absolutely i mean what if like some version of farmer is the oldest trade but not necessarily raising crops just gathering them absolutely Absolutely not. No.

Haven't you seen the study about the monkeys that will turn themselves into hookers? Exactly. Exactly. All you have to do is give the male chimp some form of food or currency that the female wants, and she'll quickly fuck him for it.

You see that like there was just one whore lady chimp hoarding grapes because monkeys kept coming over and be like i got a grape and she goes well then you get this motherfucker he fucked her he goes away she gets another grape just be honest with me taylor yeah subject matter expert was she the hottest chimp or like kind of a you've been around the block chimp her ass was so big and red she was oh she was just a northern african seven a southern african eight oh my god that's fucking well played i went to africa last year and i go i go how do you know like what countries are like safe and not safe and he goes goes, the further south you go, the safer it is.

The further north you go, don't fuck around up there. Also avoid east and west at all costs. That Icarus race in Africa is happening right now. What's that? Oh, yeah. Matt wouldn't know. I do this ridiculous thing A powered paramotor A powered paraglider

Well there's a race that goes from South Africa to Zimbabwe There's four countries involved Those? Yeah, I'd have to look up The route to get it right Don't wear a John Deere hat in South Africa nowadays You're going to end up on the cover

Where the condor gets you There are birds there that would just take you right out of the air If you wear a John Deere hat in South Africa nowadays, you're going to end up on the cover of John Deere. Bro. The condor gets you. There are birds there that would just take you right out of the air. Not to mention those tribesmen with the blowguns. You know, we joke, but it's happening now. We'll see how it goes. I'm sorry. Yeah, thus far, one guy broke his toe. Oh.

Yeah. Well, I mean, I'm sure a local medical professional will be able to get that taken care of. Yeah. I think that fixes itself, doesn't it? They sacrificed a 2K and he's almost better. Yeah. The witch doctor is all over it. Yeah.

I'm interested to see how that goes. I'm sure that's a race where nobody's wanting to spend more time on the ground. They're like, all right, I'm back up. We go where nobody's wanting to spend more time on the ground and they're like alright and back up we go back to the race yeah do you want to finish it? back here do you want to cover the Ice Poseidon thing?

I guess in some mild way Ice called me out I've been waiting to address it yeah Kyle knows the details just as well as you I only know that he mentioned in a little clip that i saw where he's like oh that wouldn't be fair you know woody's old and fragile something like that yeah twice he was like i guess i would um like so i saw it and i and this isn't good hyping for a fight but my take on it is basically this. I don't want to fight Ice Poseidon.

I'm pretty happy with my normal daily routine as it is now. I wake up when I feel like it. I go fly around and do a show at night. However, if there's a prize money situation on the line, I would fucking smoke this dude. And I would accept some sort of octagon MMA type fight with him. I would get in shape for it and it would be lopsided. So you would not box him?

No, I don't want to box him. That's not where my advantage lies. I want this to be an MMA fight. I don't know about this, Woody. It sounds like he challenged you to a fight, and you're like, ha, let's do it. The fewer rules, the better. The fewer rules, the better.

No, no, no. Don't act like I'm... I don't play Go Fish. No, no, no, no. He says he wants to fight. I say the fewer rules, the better. And it is the sissy who insists on more and more protective rules in this thing. I would smoke him.

It would be lopsided. But having said that, he's not that big a pushover. I feel like you look at Ice and you think that he's, like, not an athletic guy or something and he does this a lot. and you think that he's not an athletic guy or something and he does this a lot, if you look at him again through a clear head from the neck down, he's actually a decent specimen. He's thinner than he was at his peak. I don't know.

And is he tall? Is he taller than me? I think he is. Yeah, he is. Yeah. But I would come right at him. I would test his courage. What class are you in?

Are you in a weight class? Yeah, I would be light at him. I would test his courage. What class are you in? Are you in a weight class? I would be light heavyweight right now, but I don't know if we'd have to make weight or not. But yeah. The only thing I know about fighting, how much do you weigh? That's it. Yeah, yeah. So if there was money on the line, I would absolutely do this. I'd be totally down.

How much money? How much money does it take to fight? I'm curious. I don't know. A good amount, though. What's a good amount? It'd definitely be into the five digits. Five digits? Okay. Does Ice know how to box?

I don't know. I'm not that good at boxing. No more than Woody does. We could watch a clip of Ice fighting. There's already plenty of clips of Ice boxing. You could see how ferocious it gets. Oh, I've never seen Ice box. Oh, my God. I imagine maybe I'm wrong then.

Because honestly, if you look at Ice from the neck down, he looks pretty athletic to me. I don't know if I can find a picture. I don't know if I can spell Poseidon. He'd have me beat handily in stamina. E-O-S. E-I-D-O-N Here's a picture of him kissing a man Logistical question

If you get fucked up in a boxing match And you go to the hospital Does health insurance cover that shit? I don't know Just say you were mugged Here's him at his peak Thankfully that's not him right now That'd be some shady shit

This version of ice would kick my ass But the version of ice that i think i'd be facing is the one that gets punked on every stream time after time um i kyle if he challenged you to a boxing match how do you think you'd do look at peak ice i i could beat ice up that's where my money would lie as well. I don't see a current ice pick. I don't think it has anything to do with necessarily skill or whatever, but I just think Ice weighs like a quarter of what I do, or three quarters of what I do, and it just, you know,

even if we both trained and learned to walk. What do you think he weighs? 150 pounds. I put him in higher than that. I don't know. I just thought he was like 6'4". Nah, he's like 6'1", 6'2", like 150, 160 pounds. That's why he looks so ripped, right?

Let the record stand. I would have thought the imaginary 6'2", 150. That's a stick. Chiz says he's 6'0", and I guess 150. So that's a very thin individual. Well, I thought I was taking on a bigger guy. That's like a hockey stick. No, he wears a small. He wears a small.

His waist is like this. And I'm not shitting on ice in this i don't want to fight ice necessarily it would take a good bit of money for me to start training for a boxing fight and then travel across the country but i mean the facts are the facts he's just a much smaller individual than me like his bones i mean i'm sure he's had i've seen like his old like bodybuilding pictures or whatever like he's been in amazing shape but we're talking about boxing not like wrestling or and i wouldn't want to do mma i would definitely want to do boxing because i feel like that's that's just yeah somebody wants you to fly across the country at your own expense and fight them for no money oh no no i'm saying that in that scenario i wouldn't oh yeah that sounds like a bad deal this is all coming up because there's

this whole thing with uh like with YouTubers have started doing these. And influencers have started boxing one another in these big events. And there's a good bit of money to be made. Yeah. Really? Because you'd be surprised at the viewership that six big YouTubers can get. It's as big as a professional sporting event. It's bigger than a UFC event, the views that you'll get we tried doing this with cars it to be honest it didn't really work we

tried having like a race you know between youtubers and their project cars yeah and it it i mean it was fine but like it didn't it didn't work that well nothing's more compelling than a fistfight you know fistfight i could see yeah i can see the difference between a car race and a fist fight. Yes, I can. If you were going to race Woody in your cars, I'd be like, oh, let me know how it turns out. But if you were going to fight Woody, I would have to watch that live. I'd want to be there.

Like you, I don't really have an animus for ice. I always sort of rooted for him. And I like watching him get popular and unpopular you know he goes through these like you know floods of super popularity and then everybody gets mad at him and i always felt like i was kind of consistently on his side but um yeah if he wants to throw down then uh you know bring it just pay me i like youtuber demolition derby that's a good idea i just saw up there oh i demolition derition derby is a good plan or like figure eight You know figure a racing is legit. Oh my god. You're racing is so hardcore

Yeah, they do it, you know, they do it down here with fucking school buses, right? School bus figure eight and then they have changed school bus figure eight So that's where you have two school buses chained together and only the back one has brakes two school buses chained together and only the back one has brakes uh and so uh that that one that's fucking scary but they do that shit down here in a figure it's real crazy yeah that would be really fun yeah i definitely do i we used to do that like in my in my dad's field we would uh we would go to the auction and buy 200 cars 300 cars and you might think well that's a piece of shit that's just scrap iron no that's a ford shit. That's just scrap iron. No, that's a Ford Tempo that's 12

years old that still runs and drives just fine. That's a Pontiac Sunfire or something. I was hoping you were going to say Sunbird. Oof, the Sunbird. That's a real piece of shit. We'd go out there and just race in circles. We made a dirt track, and it

inevitably turned into a demolition derby, right? Until one of the cars ends up smoking, flaming, and we've got to put it out. That's a ton of fun. We wear helmets. Disposable cars are really, really, really excellent. We've had a lot of fun with disposable cars. I drove a Previa 1,000 miles off-road that I bought for like $1,200. Yeah.

You go through life really – or at least I do, like really respecting your vehicles and taking care of them and being like ah, this is my car, I better take care of it because I know if X, Y, and Z happens it's going to cost me thousands of dollars. But when you've got a disposable car and you're like backing up and there's a tree and you're like, the tree will tell me when to stop.

I just had a rental company fuck me so badly and overcharge me with every insurance possible. And it turned an $80 four days with a Nissan Versa into a $400 four days with a Nissan Versa. But with full fucking coverage. And boy, did I have a good time. I was mad for like a half hour. And my friend was like, don't get mad. Get even.

And I was like, that's a good point, my friend. I'm getting my $400 worth out of this car. And we set up these big Rubbermaid barrels, like the trash barrels. And we were handbrake turning them and smashing them down the parking. That's awesome. Really? So you damaged the car a bunch like there's visible scratches and dents yes but this is all a joke because if he admitted that allegedly yeah but and when you return a car damaged and you buy the insurance it's okay it actually covers you for some reason i always

thought nothing happens nothing happened you're gone you're i thought it was just a waste of money oh no it's a waste of money because you already have your own policy that's why it's a waste of money but if you're aiming to do some nefarious shit with a car you get that policy and you go i don't work you get that policy i don't recommend this like legally like get an amex and when you rent a car, just use your Amex insurance, and that will cover you. But if you think you might be in a situation where something egregious could occur, yeah, get all of it, bro. All of it. I love rental cars.

I rented the new Mustang the other day, and I wanted to ask you about this. How many fucking gears does that thing have? Ten, I think. Yeah. That's what I thought because I'm driving, and I'm just like, man, it's shifting a lot. I've been paddle shifting for a while. Yeah. They're doing everything they can to keep cars fun and also make them fuel efficient.

And it's hard. The more trucks they sell, the more – trucks are fucking popular right now. The more trucks they sell, the more everything has to – they got to find innovative ways to squeeze every possible you know uh fuel economy you know a dollar out of it and so the 10 speed which is actually shared with chevy it's the same gearbox mustang and camaro automatic and then ford f-150 and silverado and sierra they it's all the same right yeah and i actually haven't driven on one yet except in the Raptor. The Raptor was the only one I drove it in. Yeah.

I had a convertible Mustang, and I was driving through the mountains. And I'm not a professional driver or anything, but I know how to drive. I'm going 80 miles an hour through the curves, and it's just taking them. I'm like, will it do 90? Yes, it will. The speed limit out there is like 85 or something like that i don't know what it was but it was i had a blast in that car i loved it new mexico okay most things are they're nice cars i mean they they're they're well made and they perform well and they had the

independent rear suspension they switched to in 2015 to finally like you know be in the modern era um you know they it's a it's a it's a much a better driving car on uneven pavement um the good news is you can still get a six-speed manual you know the six-speed they they've made the autos this 10 speed so that they don't have to make the manuals seven speeds you know like porsche and gm now have a seven speed manual i actually have a seven speed 911 in my garage right now and it's all kind of awkward that seventh gear so they've they've made the the the the automatic you know hyper hyper gears uh in order to i think avoid having to do the seventh gear on the manual i honestly liked it a lot i felt like i always had torque i felt like anytime i touched the gas and we were we were right in the seventh gear on the manual. I honestly liked it a lot. I felt like I always had torque. I felt like anytime I touched the gas,

we were right in the right part of the band. It felt good. I liked it a lot. Was it an EcoBoost or was it a 6? EcoBoost. Yeah, yeah. I mean, a 10-speed auto with a turbo engine should keep you right in that torque band,

you know, in a smart way. I'm not surprised you enjoyed it. Were the paddles responsive? Yes, yes. I've got, my Camaro has paddles, and I'm like, I'm used to that. It felt good, though. I liked it a lot. The driving modes were very cool.

There was maybe four or five driving modes. I put it in drag race mode, and I got off the on-ramp or whatever. Drag race mode. Yeah, it's literally called Drag Race mode. In a four-cylinder convertible automatic. Fuck yeah, man. It was, dude, I don't know what the 0-60 is, but it wasn't shit. It didn't feel like it.

Actually, I bet you it's in the fives. It's probably a number that would have been shockingly fast ten years ago. It pushed me back in my seat for sure. I was like, whoa. All right. fast 10 years ago. It pushed me back in my seat for sure. I was like, whoa. And if you were to buy the EcoBoost, Cobb makes a kit for that car that's very... Is it

5.3 stock? Cool. Damn. Unless... Cobb makes a kit for that car that gives you I think it's 50 horsepower and 100 torque. And it's like maybe three. Oh, that's serious. Like intake, exhaust, intercooler, tune. You don't have to touch the rotating assembly at all. and it's like maybe three serious like intake exhaust intercooler tune you don't have to touch the rotating assembly at all it's and it's all um it's very reasonable but you end

up with you know like 350 horsepower and 450 torque and they don't those eco boost motors are the mustang one um doesn't sound great when you make it super loud like don't run a straight pipe on one of those it sounds like terrible but um but it's a they're nice little cars i think honestly the mustang camaro comparison for me typically the from in my opinion the camaros usually go a little faster but the mustangs are usually a little nicer to drive and a little nicer places to spend your time that's i like to it had some like creature comforts that i appreciated over my camaro just little things right like like i felt like the steering wheel felt better i felt like it was it

was this it was kind of squishy instead of hard softer touches it's it's better materials in better places and and the greenhouse is a little brighter and little stuff like that that adds up to make it feel like a more uh pleasant environment camaros are fucking fast but like they feel like driving a hoodie the rear window exactly right the rear i was gonna say the rear windows roll down in the mustang like like it's still kind of hard to see out of but like my camaro is so hard to fucking see out of. My dad was going to drive it the other day. He's like, I was going to move your car. I had it parked over at his house.

I had, like, swapped out and moving stuff. He's like, I was going to move your car. I got in. I couldn't see out of the fucking back of that thing. I had to get out and look around. Backup cameras. Yeah, mine doesn't have the backup camera. Oh, is it a 15?

No, it's older than that. It's 2012. Uh-oh. They they're mandated 16 and up all cars backup cameras what man date i didn't know that yeah yep turns out americans can't park for shit dude i can't park for shit i have been driving a tacoma for 15 years and i just recently got an f-150 and it's so for me that's a really big truck it's gotta be a huge truck for you right yeah and uh but it has cameras all over it you get like this fake aerial view and i depend on it 360 cam the 360 cam's cool right oh my where if i didn't have

it i'd be bumping i'd be driving it with braille you know i don't know what i the new f-150s are big as fuck dude i i'm excited for the new ranger to come out i like the colorado the mid-size trucks the new tacoma is pretty sweet too i like i like a mid-size truck now i had a raptor for a couple years and it was big and the new f-150 and the new raptor even fucking bigger they won't even fit in my garage so the bronco that's going to be on the ranger platform right i think that's the word on it now is that a new ranger platform or is that the old range of platform because like when i heard it was gonna be a global ranger platform which was new i don't know two years ago okay yeah i don't like why isn't it on the f-150 chas like 50 is huge i want

the bronco to be huge oh well sorry when, sorry. When I heard it was on the – Buy a Raptor and put a cap on it. It's so fucking expensive, right? Like how much is that Bronco going to be? You know, I don't know. I know they're doing it, and that's kind of all I know. I don't really – a lot of people asking about like the rumor mills of the upcoming stuff, and there are some people who do what i do that are real

insidery and are all about the rumors and and i until there's a fucking thing for me to go drive like i kind of don't give a shit you're not flying your drone over test tracks yeah no i live right on um bmw's uh fuel economy testing route so like right past my house, like at 4.30 every single day, like four or five camoed up BMWs will drive by. And they've been running that Rolls SUV and the new diesel Mini and the new Z5, which is the Supra shared platform.

And the new M5. And so I see them go by like every day. Yeah, the Bronco looks cool to me. I gotta say that O.J. Simpson made the Bronco fucking legendary. It's the Bronco. O.J. Simpson killed the Bronco. Oh, but it's coming back though.

That's not all he killed. Unlike Nicole, the Bronco's coming back. In 1997, the Expedition came out and the Expedition was going to be called the Bronco's coming back. In 1997, the Expedition came out, and the Expedition was going to be called the Bronco until fucking OJ. That was the next Bronco, until OJ killed the brand cred of the Bronco. It's cool now. I don't know if last time we talked about the cycle of coolness in a car.

So a car starts out as new cool, and then the second owner is enthusiast cool like four years later and then it sort of drifts downward into uncool right and then a lot of them will fall off the radar right but some will be kept really really nice and then those will become ironically cool before spending a couple years at that stage and then moving back into full cool. I feel like the FJ Cruiser did that. I remember when that thing came out. I was selling cars in Atlanta. When was that cool? When it came out. And when it was brand new,

they're flying off the lot. My friend was selling Toyotas. He had moved from Ford to Toyota. And he was like, oh yeah, we're selling for two grand over sticker. I'm like, what? It's just a fucking silly little SUV. This is like 2005-ish, not the old one. Yeah. 2006, I'd say. Oh yeah, yeah, the modern one,

not the ancient one. But bro, in LA, I know a guy here in Los Angeles, his whole job is he exports FJ cruisers to Japan, where they get, they bring a ton of money. US spec FJs. So he buys them and just has a warehouse like 30

of them and like container ship like straight to Japan and they pay a ton of money for them over there. It's wild. That's interesting. I want one. I kind of like them. Bronco. Have you seen the Bronco Woody? I have seen the

artist renditions of them. I don't know that they've actually displayed it. None of them seem particularly accurate, actually. So I'm on target in that they haven't really shown us what it looks like. No. There's been no actual official Bronco images at all. Well, I think you'll agree with this.

Yeah, you probably are. I've probably seen it. Is it red, by the way? It's a YouTube video. What I think they have shown us is i mean look at what this video is the bronco with like tarps on it and stuff so people have had decent guests uh guesses i mean to say yeah i don't know i wouldn't trust any of the guesses um what is this video is this video actually have something on it uh i don't know like i looked at it but like photo like video editing is so good now then this isn't a video by the way it's a video of images okay of uh

what what well no this this thing that is shown this blue thing that i'm looking at in this video is a seEMA truck. So someone built a custom thing. That's not a Photoshop. Someone built that, but that's not the Ford Bronco. Well, I want that instead then. I don't know shit about cars, but that looks a lot like a Range Rover. I see it.

The whole emblem on the front. If you told me that was a Range Rover from this distance, I don't know cars very well, but I would buy it. I think it looked like a Range Rover from this distance, I don't know cars very well, but I would buy it. I think it looks cool. I think it looked like a Range Rover until the Range Rover pull up. Yeah.

Okay. Yeah, this is, I don't know. I like the retro look. When Ford made the Mustang in 05 and they went with that retro look, I feel like they showed everybody a new way to do things. Well, they weren't the first. If you want to go

retro, you've got to go further back than that right now. Unfortunately, we have to have sad truth. Got to go further back than that. Help me out. It's not going to be good when we get there, I assure you. We've got to go back to the PT Cruiser. Oh, you're right.

On the neon platform. And before that it was the Prowler. The Plymouth Prowler. Which looked cool. But they weren't retro. They were new. Just old styling. I don't know what the Prowler was supposed to be.

They called that Retro Future. My dad had a 35 Ford slant back. Looks a lot like the PT Cruiser. And people were like, oh, you got the PT Cruiser? No. No, this is a car that we put together with our bare hands for three years. This thing has a 350 Chevy engine in it.

No, no, this isn't a piece of shit. But was there anyone before the Mustang who, like, I don't know, was inspired by their old version? That's what we're talking about. Well, yeah, but you're talking about the PT Cruiser. I don't think there was a 1940s PT Cruiser or a 1940s Prowler. No, no, but it was definite. No, it wasn't a direct inspiration. No, that's correct. If you want to go with a real on-the-nose direct, I'll give it to Rolls-Royce, which came out with the Phantom in 2003 that really did look like the old Phantom.

Okay. That throwback look. Yeah. I think I would give it to them. But, yeah, of the mass market cars, yeah, Ford and the 2005 Mustang. I would say yes. And then I want to say, I don't know if it was the Dodge or the Camaro that came out next, but they were inspired. Okay, and I think they were inspired by the Mustang's success.

SRT Challenger, 09. 09 was the Challenger, and then 10 was the Camaro. Okay, yeah. So then I thought it sparked a neat little trend, and I like all three of those. Yeah, and actually, you know what? If you want to go jump into trucks, you could say the Ram. The Ram that had sort of the semi-truck nose beginning in the 90s. That was sort of a throwback to pickup trucks of the 50s.

That's true. Although it wasn't as obvious as the Mustang in 05. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, the throwback fucking styling, I mean, I think those overall shapes of those cars, they have decided are kind of what those shapes are going to be now. Dude, the 60s were such a good time for car design, I feel like. Those Camaros, to me, are some of the finest American cars ever made. Looking, to just look at a

69 Z28 or a Supersport or whatever, just, ah, God, I love that. That look, I love it. You know what I think looks good? I think they're doing an amazing job with Corvettes. And maybe it's just me. Maybe, you know, when you hit your mid-40s, you become mandated

to like Corvettes. Yeah, you're the only one who likes the Corvette. But here, let me lay out my point. I like it, and I own the Corvette. I'll plead guilty. All right. So the Corvette, like I look at one from like 10 years ago. I'm like, that thing looks amazing. Then I see a more recent one, and that thing looks more amazing.

And they keep passing it, and every iteration is better than the one before. And they look like supercars. And I'm like, man. They are supercars. I guess. Yeah, I they look like supercars and i'm like cars i guess yeah i guess they're supercars but i think they're not but that's okay well what's the what's the supercar one it's like the z x1 zr1 i drove the cr1 recently it's fucking batshit it's really really really really crazy it's 750 horsepower but you wouldn't call it like a supercar that no i don't think it's exclusive enough um i actually don't think it's expensive enough i don't i don't think a corvette really i don't i'm not nearly as knowledgeable in cars as the

three of you i thought supercar just meant like real deal insane performance like super fast super like or is it like availability like it has to be a little more elite not everybody yeah so a lot of people like in the comment sections of my videos will debate this the the exact nuanced meaning of sports car supercar hypercar and where exactly do you draw the lines um for me the line is no longer really about performance because you can buy a 700 horsepower dodge challenger right 800 you can buy an 800 horsepower dodge challenger right now um you know and you can buy a 755 horsepower corvette i mean you can buy insanely fast versions of sort of normal cars um and For me, the line is drawn on

exclusivity, but that's just my personal opinion. 800 horsepower Dodge Challenger is $100,000 I think, right? It is, yeah. Not a supercar. Not a supercar. Here's why. Because if it's fucking parked and you sit in it, sitting in it parked

is roughly identical to sitting in a rental Dodge Challenger that costs $26,000. You're just missing a few seats. Yeah. Yeah, there's some seats missing. It's a different color. And it comes with some – It's a different experience.

Doesn't it come with tires and like a floor jack for the drag strip and stuff? And it comes with like a pirate chest full of things. That's super. It is. It's really cool. It's a drag racing special car. big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, big, the highest one it's the 700 horsepower one not the 800 horsepower one what's that one the 800 horsepower one is a demon thank you and that's the drag racing one you don't really those don't really go around corners the hellcat where they now have with the wide body and the wider tires

so i tested that at the racetrack it's got 315s all around just huge tires huge like like a foot over a foot wide um and it's 700 horsepower and the paddle shift eight speed. I mean, the numbers, if you write them down, say supercar, right? But it moves around a lot. The hood goes like this when you go real fast. The brakes overheat. It's kind of unstable at high speed. It's a little little bouncy and then you do the same track in the new acura nsx or a porsche 911 turbo or a gt3 and these cars have a tightness about them it's a fineness of engineering it's not you know what i mean it's not the size of the sledgehammer so much as the way the edges of it are beveled perfectly.

And it's a precision in engineering that there's no amount of horsepower that you can overcome a lack of that. And so that, to me, it's a level of build quality, engineering exclusivity that defines a supercar versus just a very, very powerful muscle car or sports car. It's fun to try to define it, too, because if you did lap times, is it the Ariel Atom that I'm thinking of? That thing is super high, the super amazing lap times, right? Yeah, a little more so like probably five or six years ago, the newest like huge power cars on a short racetrack, an Ariel Atom is a weapon. But on a big racetrack, a road America,

a Nurburgring or a, a whatever, you know, you've got a ZR one with 750 horsepower or a Viper ACR with six 50 and, and full downforce. Um, it's the, the newer supercars have a top end, you know, that is unheard of. I mean, I just had a, um, a week, a glorious week with the McLaren 720 S. And I mean, the fact that just that all it takes is money. I mean, it's just, you, you show up with money and here is a fucking missile. I mean, they say it's making like 700 horsepower. I think it's more like eight it runs a nine second quarter mile out of the box with seats full in it you don't you don't need a special crate of shit and on top of all that shit is cool yeah the greatest shit is fun

my friend has a demon and has the greatest shit for sure he probably drives around people don't know i feel like we haven't laid it out there when you buy the dodge demon it comes with like a pirate chest of things so that you like bring that with you and it has like a floor jack maybe new tires um help me what else do you know what's in it yeah so you get skinny tires for the front right because it comes with four like normal tires right so you it comes with normal front tires so you get the skinnies and then it comes with four like normal tires right so you it comes with normal front tires so you get the skinnies and then it comes with a jack and shit to change them it then yeah there's a box of the box of the stuff i think you then it comes with all anything you need to change a tire like a torque wrench and whatever i think there's like an air wrist an

air filter or air intake delete kit there's a thing um i don't know all the parts but like it's a bunch of stuff the hardware to take it take the passenger seat out it's a bunch of impact wrench a torque wrench and i guess you aired down the tires i would guess yeah you air down the you air down the rears yeah so it has a little you know tire inflator it's uh fun, man. I don't know. I'm on their website right now and just looking at all the shit you got to do to have fun with this and the amount it costs.

This is so not me. I would never want to go and be like, all right, now I'm going to fiddle fuck around with my car and then I'm going to do all this and then drag it back and forth a couple times, ruin my tires, then get my little chest back out, fix it back up, go buy new tires, and head home. I like to get to the racetrack a day early and go camping there so that I can prepare my car. But it's street legal, kind of.

I tow it behind my camper. Here's the difference. Here's the difference. The Dodge Demon is $100,000. The Dodge Demon is $100,000, right? And if you put all this crap on it or take some of the crap off, whatever you use the tools for, you can run a nine-second quarter mile with a car that does pass California smog and that has air conditioning. And my friend who owns the Demon bought it in Florida and drove it home to San Francisco. It's a totally drivable 800-horsepower car.

It's $100,000, right? drivable 800 horsepower car it's 100 grand right but if you want to do that without needing a crate of stuff you know and having the engine in the middle instead of the front and having a carbon tub instead of a chassis that you can rent from hertz for 35 a day it costs 300 grand now you're into a mclaren you know what i mean now you've got a carbon tub and now you can run those same lap times by showing up with a fucking espresso and a cigar and saying hello boys line them up and that's it you just show up and you're good to go none of that's like no wrenching but it costs triple cost triple it'd be like going paintball but every time you went you have to like rebuild it and like go and scavenge for a co2 tank like so painful and you know on top of that i spent a week with the mclaren and i did everything rebuild it and go and scavenge for a CO2 tank. So painful. On top of that, I spent a week with the McLaren, and I did everything in it.

I took it for groceries. I took it to the office. I ran errands all over the city. When you take a normal car, whether it's a Dodge Hellcat, and I don't mean to be unfair to Dodge. Credit to Sergio Marchione who just died, unfortunately, like yesterday. None of us are shareholders. You can say whatever the fuck you want about that.

No, no. Look, he greenlit an 800 horsepower car. You know, it takes a certain kind of executive to do that. I feel like I can do that. As a matter of fact, 900. Knock yourself out, boys. Make it a cool 1,000. We're not losing this. When you've got cars with the engine in the middle or in the back you have these geometries that are possible with front

suspensions that allow the car to ride really well and handle really well you can have longer control arms that come further into the center of the car because there's no engine there right so and you can have big radiators up front that you could put them in any way you want because there's no engine there, right? So there's different ways of doing things. And so when you have, whether it's a Porsche or a Ferrari or a McLaren or even a Toyota MR2, a mid-engine platform is just able to ride really well in the city where roads are bumpy and then handle really well without beating

you up whereas all amg m srt cars that are based on normal platforms to make them handle better it's just wider wheels stickier tires stiffer shocks and springs what does mid-engine mid-engine literally means the engine as opposed to being up front would be behind the driver but in front of the rear axle so a porsche 911 the engine actually partially hangs back over the rear axle past the rear axle so we call that rear engine whereas uh you know the ferraris most of the ferraris the lamborghinis the engine is in the middle because behind the driver but in front of the Ferraris, the Lamborghinis. The engine is in the middle because it's behind the driver, but in front of the rear axle. Okay.

Why has zero to 60 times gotten so much better in the last, whatever it is, five, 10 years? Because of dual clutch transmissions and because of the top performing cars having all wheel drive and because of turbo chargers and very intelligent anti-lag uh programs uh that cars can use i mean uh the the porsches which are crazy fast on launch the turbo porsches and the the mclarens which are all i mean the mclaren is a rear drive vehicle not an all-wheel drive car and will still do zero to sixty and under three um and it does it with a lot of clutch slipping

oh it's gotta feel so good it's fucking and it does it with a lot of clutch slipping oh it's gonna feel so good it's fucking fast it probably gives you that feeling of like you know those roller coasters where it just boom you know you don't go up the thing it just explodes you out you like feel your organs like pushing back a little bit that's probably what it feels like to drive it that's what launching a tesla feels like if you've ever launched the tes 100D, that is like one of those magnetic coasters. A Porsche Turbo is kind of like that as well. It's because it shifts. There's zero loss in torque when it shifts.

It has this crazy gearbox. The Porsche has a dual-clutch gearbox, which is a paddle-shift gearbox. And it's rated to 3,000 launches, which is, I mean, you know, it's a 10-second car out of the box. And you show up and you can launch it over and over and over and over and over and over and over. I once launched one of those 60 times in a row just for fun. And I got stopped because I got bored, not because the car broke. Like, it's crazy. The McLaren, the 0-60 is awesome, but where it really blows your mind is 120 to 190 then it's like um

uh you know when you because it's boost by gear right so you don't get all like 700 wheel in first and second gear you get it by like fourth so when you do a three four upshift and it pulls harder that is like oh i'm in some next level shit. You know, it's one of those. What's the fastest car or what's the fastest you ever got to in a car? And I guess what was that car? 220 I did once in a road car. Hennessy Venom GT.

I haven't even heard of that thing. Yeah. Oh, I don't know if Hennessy's work. Yeah. Oh, I don't know if Hennessy's work. So John Hennessy is this crazy Texan guy who got famous in the 90s and 2000s for putting twin turbos on Vipers and going really, really fast with them. And he decided to build his own car that was sort of based on a Lotus Elise tub. But then he worked with a company called Penske that's known for racing as much as moving trucks uh they engineer a lot of racing hardware and they basically took a lotus elise and a uh a race car called a daytona prototype and put those cars together so they sort of stretched the lotus

and then they put in a 1300 horsepower twin-horsepower twin-turbo V8 with a manual transmission, a gearbox called a Ricardo gearbox, which is a $30,000 manual gearbox from the Ford. So it's like an around-town car. Actually, it's really easy to drive because you know why? It makes something like 500 pounds of torque at idle. And so you can literally just let the clutch out and drive it around idling and upshift it. That's how I drive my tractor.

It's got very long gears because you can pretty much drive it like a diesel. You can shift up at 1,500 RPM. And actually, because they lengthen the wheelbase 18 inches, it rides better. It's stiffer. It rides better than the Lotus. It was quite an interesting thing. And I got to take it on a runway. And it was Steven Tyler's personal car from Aerosmith.

What's your bang for the buck car? Bang for the buck. Depends how much buck. Used. All right. You've got a budget of 45 000 by used car should i would buy it should be fun fun is the only requirement yeah it's a it's a grown-ups toy do you need a back seat no okay uh i i would say 45 000 gets you a lot of 2009 to 2011 Porsche 911 Carrera S with a manual. Okay.

That's where my money would go. You know where I was guiding you toward? I want your opinion. A Lotus? Lotus, a Lease, a Lanza? I don't know what my Lotus is. Well, a Lease is the really little one. And then there's an Evora, which is the slightly bigger one. one right and they should be had in that range ish yeah i think yeah yeah if you're going

for an elise definitely 45 000 will get you a really nice really really nice elise or exige a really nice one they're like very go-karty you know manual steering minimal sound dampening you know toyota engines so they're they're pretty reliable they're stout little cars as long unless unless you crash them um but no they're safe but they have clamshells so there's not no there's not really such a thing as a small accident you have to replace a half car um and uh the evora the bigger one i just i recommend getting the s the supercharged model or the 400 which is the newer one um the non-supercharged one kind of sucks but they sorted some stuff out a little later the 400 i just had for a month was so fucking good so

fucking good but 911 carrera is the one that you landed on without prompting. Right now, you know, I drive a lot of cars. And frankly, most cars I drive, I just think this should be more like a 911. And when I drive 911s, I go, everything should really just be more like this. And that's sort of where I'm at right now. So many car people say that. Where they're like, they just love the Porsche 911. Well, have you ever tried one? No.

Yeah, I mean, if you ever get it, I mean, you know, you guys have Turo. You could grab one for a day for $150 and have a real nice day if you wanted to have a go. What's that? What did you, Turo? Do you guys know about Turo? Are they an advertiser? We're about to learn i've watched dub domoro videos where he lays it out every time yeah yeah toro t-u-r-o is an app that's

like an airbnb for cars for people's personal cars and so now we're gonna have yeah so you can rent like some really really interesting things i mean like modded Evos and fucking S2000s and exotic stuff and vintage cars. There's some really neat stuff. And there's also normal cars too. That's pretty cool. Yeah, I mean you can have a go in a late model 911 for $150 a day and have a great day. All right, I'm doing this now. I just went to

Toro in Atlanta. You're absolutely right. A couple hundred bucks and you've got a Porsche 911 here. What does $280 a day get you? A 2013 911? It's a great day. BMW i8 for $248.

That's overpriced. That should be about $175 a day. Don't give in to those crooks. i8s are very cool, but they're not really worth spending real money on. Tesla S for $180 a day. Oh. Maserati Quadraport for $170. Why is my town so lame?

Like Honda Civic for $57. A Hyundai for $38. Like Honda Civic for $57,000, a Hyundai for $38,000. I can get a BMW 18 or i8, whatever, for $263,000. Oh, here's an expensive one. The Mercedes AMG GT. How much is that? $896,000 a day.

That's a lot. That's a lot. It's high. I mean, it's less than an exotic car rental place would probably charge you but it's so long in la dude you can get there's a right now there's a ferrari 348 spider going around for 350 a day like that's pretty fun um there's a bunch of porsches there's a bunch of good stuff that you can get in la i'm getting a a model 3 that was, uh, 119 a day. And I get it for a week. Turo's hooking it up full disclosure there. That's a comp, but,

um, but yeah, 119 bucks a day for like a brand new model three, which will be cool. Is a model S Tesla, the cool one with launch control and stuff? Uh, yeah,

though you, what you want is a P. So Tesla, uh, Tesla, uh, nomenclatures, P means the performance version, the fast one.

And then the number, 75, 85, 90, 100 is the size of the battery pack. And then the D, if the D is optional, means dual motor or all-wheel drive. So the P100D

is the fastest one. How much is one of those to just buy? Brand new? Yeah. Like $145,000. They're fucking expensive. They're really expensive. And a Model X with the Falcon doors and a P100D, my neighbor just bought one.

It was $177,000. Oh, there's one of those on here. How do you take that anywhere where you need to park? What do you mean? Like those Falcon doors. Those are the ones that go, like, not the ones that go, like, back. Watch my hands. So they're center hinged.

So a DeLorean, right, imagine a DeLorean door. DeLoreans are center hinged, and they swung out from the center, right? So as they go out and up, they only went six inches out of the car. So you could actually park a DeLorean very close to the wall. So the Falcon doors, my hands, unlike a DeLorean, which was a fixed one piece, Falcon door is a two piece.

So what happens is they go up like this. So they don't stick out very much at all they do go very high and so actually when i had the model x as a loner um i couldn't open the falcon doors inside my garage it was dumb as fuck this is sick i'm looking at this here's a tesla model x for 226 that looks really fun is it a 90 or 100 d uh i don't see uh 75d yeah so that one is not going to be fast it'll still be pretty cool it just won't be the super fast one gotcha um and i bet the i bet you the fast one is a bit more expensive too but the cool thing about the model x is the windshield the windshield in a model x goes up and becomes like almost a sunroof.

It goes up past your head. So as you look up, it's completely seamless from road to sky. That shit is spectacular. Here's a Benz AMG GT. Oh, that's beautiful. Yeah. What do they want for that? $275 a day.

$275 a day? For an AMG GT? Oh, hell yeah. That's money well spent. It's not my favorite color. What color is it? It's like dark mustard gold or something. Oh, yeah. It's the launch color.

The mustard gold. Oh, who buys a car that dope and gets it in that color? $510 horsepower. I want everybody to see that. Look at the sneaky old man in the passenger seat Does he come with it? I want to keep an eye on you Wow

It's a pretty good I don't know what this dude is doing next to this car He's really proud I think he's also Advertising his gym on the shirt I think he's going to choke you out If you get a dent in his car He looks like the kind of person who

gets those, though. Here, wait. I'm going to search LA. LA has the dopest shit, dude. LA's got some really... You can rent, like, movie cars and shit. They had Kit on... Night Rider? Yeah. Yeah.

I want the Hoffman. Bro, so you can get an 09S class for $100 a day. Here's a Hellcat for $150 a day, straight up. Here's a Z4M Coupe manual, 07, for $89 a day. This is such a cool service. How long has this been a thing, and why did I not know about it? Oh, bro. Habibi. Habibi. I have green g wagon green g63 it's like nuclear waste green for 110 bucks a day

it's 570 in atlanta it's a 2014 uh g g class they should pay us to do this commercial for them right now but like they absolutely should yeah it's pretty it's pretty fucking cool right you can get some and like they don't want to use this service until they sponsor the program for them right now. They absolutely should. It's pretty fucking cool, right? No one uses this service until they sponsor the program. In LAX, they leave cars at the airport. So that Model 3, I'm just coming back from a thing and it's just going to be at the airport.

That's really cool, man. Audi R for $233,000. Is that a rip-off? An R8? Yeah. No, an R8's a lovely driving experience. What year? 11. Yeah, good time.

I'm definitely going to do this. I'm going to do this soon. What are the insurance requirements? Is there anything weird? It comes with insurance. Comes with insurance? Yep. These cars? Bro! Oh, dude. 1984 Lincoln comes with insurance yep these cars bro oh dude 1984 lincoln town car cartier edition 94 a day this is so fun i'm gonna do this i'm gonna drive a couple of that shit this is so

worth it fucking fire i'll go make my dad think i've spent $100,000 on a car and give him a heart attack. Oh, that's funny. Do that. Like, look what I got! Well, I've been going through some tough times, Dad, and I thought I'd treat myself. I thought I'd treat myself with a $140,000 Tesla. Yeah, if you wanted to punk somebody, it would be good.

Honestly, the i8 BMW is the coolest-looking car that I've seen. Like, performance aside, man, it looks so cool. You know, Nate, I believe that this Lincoln you were linking looks like an old-person car is further bolstered by the fact that the photo was taken with it

in the handicapped spot. Totally. That Lincoln is awesome, though. That's a drug dealer car from a late 90s movie. Yeah, Tony Montana should be in that thing. We have some really good stuff. Here's an Alpha 4C for $150 a day.

I've seen like three M3s for $100 a day. So we get it. This bit has run its course. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I'm definitely going to exercise this little option. I'm going to take advantage of this as soon as possible. So there's no fees tacked on or addendums or anything weird like that? Not really. There might be

some... I mean, don't hold me to it. And frankly, I've rented from Taro three times. I haven't actually had to pay out of pocket a single time. It's all been comped for plugs. But a lot of people fucking use it, honestly. And when I do get the cars, I get them in the same way a customer would get the cars.

I just get reimbursed. So I don't, you know, there may be some extra fees, but it's not, there's not. The shit I told you about the Nissan Versa before, that doesn't happen. I'm going to get on that tomorrow. I'm going to try to find something cool to drive for a couple hundred bucks. Let me do a quick ad read here. Tell everyone about Dollar Shave Club. Guys, your bathroom called.

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All right. I've got a, since this is kind of a car topic, it's got a little car flavor on it. Did you see this cop shooting through his front windshield at a bad guy? Oh, that video is crazy. I'm usually up to date on this kind of thing. This guy goes, I don't know what the guy he's shooting at did, but I can only imagine that he raped a convent of nuns

and had one in the car with him, like wearing her head as a helmet or something like that because this cop is he's there to kill him this cop is trying to murder this man as they drive down a semi-busy what looks like california neighborhood i don't recall i didn't i only saw the gif or jif version of it i didn't watch the whole video. I can't imagine the cops started this gunfight. Did they? I'm guessing.

I didn't see. I don't know. Someone who's seen it got to tell me. Are we going to watch it together? Yeah, we'll wait for Taylor to get back. I'm going to read the description a little bit. Let's see. It says Las Vegas police on Monday released the body cam footage of two men weaving through traffic and, you're right, shooting at officers during a violent chase downtown that left one of the men dead and the other wounded Wednesday morning. They were 22 and 30 years old.

I think they were wanted for shooting a 25-year-old. Yeah, yeah, there you go. They had already murdered one person, it seems. And they were on the run. And this cop is not fucking around i've i've often wondered why you never see cops do this because i've always thought that'd be pretty effective you know in your car you could shoot right out the windshield although i have been in a car and fired a a handgun like this a glock or a 1911 i remember which it's so fucking loud it's so fucking loud can you imagine firing that shit

in a car this is something you'd know when you shoot the windshield doesn't the bullet change direction does it go down does it go up what what happens it's not going to be as accurate as it normally is because it just got deformed and it's doing some weird shit but his target is so close and i mean he you know he's not he's not being a marksman. Anyway, he's slinging lead at that car in front of him So it really doesn't matter that much the real issue to me is twofold one I can't tell you how loud it is in that car when you're shooting a handgun out the windshield I've done exactly what he's doing here before It's so much louder than then even been at like a closed indoor range loud

And the other thing and there's the part that scared me the most, is when you shoot a windshield, little bits of glass come out, but then there's almost a vapor of windshield glass that starts floating around that can get into your eyes and you can even inhale. And forget fiberglass. This is much larger and scarier

pieces, but they're still sort of airborne, and you can see them sort of floating around. And this guy's firing multiple shots, so I'm queued at zero here if we want to check these. I'm ready. I actually watched this, and Kyle, could you tell if he actually hit anyone with the shots to the windshield or

no? Yeah, he killed that guy. With those shots? Uh, I don't know about those shots. I don't know if he, well, no, there's no way to tell if he hit him there or not, because at one point he gets out and dumps another mag into the guy. Why don't you guys drop the link in the chat for me, please? It's there. Yeah, it's... Scroll up a little bit. It's

Bodycam Shows Officer Shooting. Oh, sorry. The preview did not come up. That's all good. Bullshit! Goddamn YouTube or Skype. One of them. Not our fault. Fucking YouTube... Skype or YouTube or whatever. Okay, good to Not our fault. Fucking YouTube. Skype. Or YouTube. Or whatever. Okay. Good to go. Three, two, one,

play. I love the fact that these guys have to wear video cameras. Oh, me too. I love it. I'm already digging that his name is Charlie 4. This is some good- ass footage, dude. Right, it's well placed, it's on his shoulder looking forward.

He needs to really work on his hand position on the wheel though, like he shouldn't have gone at the 12 o'clock position there. He should keep his hand at 9 o'clock. Whoa, no hands, buddy. Dude, if you think that's bad, wait until you see him reload his handgun. Oh, that move was sick! He just threaded the needle. Dude, this cop is... I mean, so far he's looking pretty good from a driving perspective. Especially considering it looks like he's an explorer. The cops I work with on shoots hate the explorer.

They call it slow and fragile. But none of the CHP get the turbo ones. They all get the bullshit NA6, which is a pig. So they all hate it They all wish they had the the crown Vicks back just fun to know I'm the only guy who watches this video with his head turned sideways to fix it Is this a Taurus oh, I just thought that it looked at similar in height to the other sedans I have no idea. I think I'm sorry it might be a Taurus

They have a similar interior with the Taurus and the Explorer They're on the same platform. I've always enjoyed the explorers when I rented them. I wasn't doing anything Performance related just just cruising across the country But yeah, you weren't trying to like smash curbs and like pit maneuver people there who sees the OJ Bronco. There's the OJ Bronco White white 95 Broncos are the most valuable of the modern Broncos now I bet Because they're moving into real cool Dude

If Kim Kardashian kills someone And makes a slow escape in anything I'm just going to invest in those Just a fleet in whatever vehicle Yeah, whatever she drives Fucking like orange Honda Civic Just a fleet in whatever vehicle. Yeah, whatever she drives. Fucking like orange Honda Civics. All right, this is what I need.

This guy's running a lot of red lights. Oh, so he's being shot at. I just want to point out he's been shot at before. Is he in a Tahoe or a Blazer or something? Is it the bad guy? It looks like an Expedition. It's an Expedition, huh? Well, the irony, right, of it being an expedition, which

was going to be the Bronco. Alright. Some part of this must be a lot of fun for the cop. I really like most of the decisions this cop is making so far, like, regarding driving, I'm like, I really approve of.

His heart's gotta be pounding. Like, this is, this is what we trade for! Yeah. This is why I joined the force. I've been writing tickets for 18 years, someone's gonna die today. This fucking boss. You think he's wishing, I think, I bet you he's going, I wish I had a goddamn rear drive fucking vehicle.

Oh yeah, for sure. He wishes he had one of those interceptors. You know what really helps right now with him with this? As you see, it's driving a Ford that has the blind spot mirrors, the convex corners on the mirrors. Those are really nice. It eliminates his need to check blind spots. He's rolling the window down. I know why he's doing that.

Oh, so he doesn't blow his eardrum out? I thought that's why he was doing it, but then he tried to point the gun out the window. Oh, here he goes. Oh, shit. Nice little five tap through his windshield. Nice cluster. Bro, he's still... Two hands! I like it, I like it.

Dude, this guy is awesome! I mean, he's probably like spraying and hitting kids and shit, but other than that he's awesome! He's got a laser sight, you see his laser sight on the windshield there? He should go for a tire, I think. Wow, the expedition on ramp- Look at that! This is the lamest ramp I've ever seen. It's on ramp with clear tails, dude.

Oh my god, I'm better! And I'm- OH HE'S BACKWARDS! Put his mag in backwards. Oh, look at that guy. Just unload the fucking mag. By the way, I think he might have a flat in the left rear. I like this move too, behind the cover.

Wow. That was crazy. That was crazy. Yeah. I think I'm on the side of that cop. Oh yeah, he's not in trouble. I watched that video as well before, and I totally agree with Kyle and Woody that I was Super impressed with like the badass shooting through the window and then I saw him like switch his gun to his left hand to hit it like this and slide the

Magazine out and then put it in backwards initially and it's like this this isn't even close to right it in backwards initially and it's like this this isn't even close to right that's someone who is so hyped up on adrenaline so scared slash excited slash in the moment like like he's forgotten any training he had he put in his he's like like he's in the red it's it's click click it's it's that fast for a reload it's it's and you're there when When I'm shooting at paper, maybe. Dude, I'll tell you what, though. I don't know as much about guns as you guys, but from the driving perspective, that cop, by police standards,

that's an excellent driver. By police standards, that was good shooting, too. I was going to say the same thing, because shooters would be like, yeah, cops, they're not incompetent and competent compared to like, you know, the average housewife. But they're not good. Who just said that looked like Frank? That's fucking funny.

Cops are so fucking bad. It's interesting. You can watch these and be like, I'd do this. I'd do that. I'd be sliding that mag out, slamming it back in, ready to rock. be sliding that mag out slamming it back in ready to rock but it really i feel like when two of those suvs pulled in front of me i would have been like all right there's a shady guy at this 7-eleven i'm gonna stop over make sure nothing's going on you guys handle him i already i you know i loosened him up for you what i'd actually do is just fire five rounds because that's like all i

have and then be like you gotta. I'm out of bullets. There's no reloading here. My LCR is gone and I didn't bring a reload. Simultaneously pooping and running away. That's sick. I liked it a lot. I really liked that move of shooting out the windshield. I hope he's got glasses on.

Because that glass was just... And honestly, Scorsese should hire him for a fucking stunt coordinator and DP, because that was a great angle as well. Yeah. He really had great coverage. What's DP in this scenario? Because it doesn't fit. Director of photography.

Oh, okay. Not double penetration. I didn't know the other DP. What is your camera? I've watched many of these cop videos like live uh i guess you know the cop cam videos but i went on a couple tangents this week watching like just one after another after another after another and i can't get enough of them now these are too entertaining the only thing you have to look for is fatal shooting if you don't

if you just do regular shooting sometimes they just like it's just missing and it's just like shots were fired and then nothing happened so if you want real shit you have to make sure fatal's in there very entertaining and i haven't seen a single person fatally shot where i wasn't like yeah they they didn't deserve that everyone so far has been like yeah you were asking for it all those of them that are fucked up are the ones that are clearly suicide by cop yeah how much it's fucking with the cops in real time there was one dude who got out of his car and was like backing up from the police who were obviously in front of him and he was like putting his hand behind him like obviously like moving around trying to make it clear that he was like doing something they're like hey you know hands up hands up we will shoot you if you don't stop doing that we

will shoot you and they keeps doing it they warn him again they warned him like four times and then they shoot him laying on the ground he changes his mind and he's like shot he reaches into the front of his pants and starts like fiddling around and they're like dude please get your hands out of your pants we don't want to shoot you again. Please get it out. And the cop goes, bang, bang, bang. Shoots him three times. And they go, all right, no more hands in the pants. Dying goes,

It's like a Monty Python. Again? Make me shoot you again. I think that was the one where a guy with a shotgun came over and was waiting to and right as he, in the final time, he blasts him with the shotgun. With the shotty!

Timmy, what happened to Spot? Here's my least favorite one. The guy wanted to die at the hands of the cops and it wasn't like a, free kill for the cops! It was like, we're quivering in a way where it was like these are people who are scared and not wanting to do what they're doing right now i saw one it happened

in um like an underground subway train else it might have been chicago i don't know but um they get the guy on the ground and they pin him so the guy is held, and he's down, and he's starting to comply. The guy pulls out his gun, puts it at the back of his head, and shoots him, and then realizes, fuck, that wasn't my taser. And it's just like, yeah.

Yep. Oh, I saw that. Did you see that? I remember that. That's horrible. That's like almost That's almost unbelievable. I can see it. They're like guns.

Isn't that why they're yellow? Yeah, I don't know. Let's talk about paramotors for a second. I sometimes get in the yellow and I'm not the best version of me. I can see how these mistakes are made. You get a little freaked out. It starts fucking with your head and you gotta take a breath and that's that's fucked up i saw a

guy i was up filming two days ago and a guy had fucking jumped off a bridge in the canyons and was like laying at the bottom of a ravine they were like holding up traffic he had just driven his car into the middle of the bridge parked it and, and just jumped. Suicide or base jumper? Not a base jumper. Okay. Definitely not a base jumper. Well, I mean, technically. I'll be back from my car late for us. Radical! I'm killing

myself, friends. First come, first serve on the car. Base stands for what? Like bridge, antenna, something, elevated. So still a base jumper, technically. Yeah, I suppose. It doesn't say baser. It's not like there's supposed to be a chute in there.

You know, call me old-fashioned, but if you're going to kill yourself, be courteous to those around you. Park legally. Don't go park in the middle of the street and jump off. Don't blow your head out in the Denny's, you know, where everybody is going to miss out on their late night munchies or whatever. Like, making a mess. Just do it in your garage like a normal person.

Park illegally. Leave your keys in the ignition with a little tag that says, Finders Keepers. Hmm? He may have done that. When they let me cross the bridge, there was a white Hyundai parked in the middle of the bridge with cones around it and the door opened

I think he might have left his keys I don't know some good Samaritan is going to be like no prowler, what do you know when you're about to jump off a bridge that instinct kicks in as you're about to leap you go alright, phone, wallet, keys

just to make sure and I'm good that's fucked up keys i have to go in 20 i apologize is that cool okay no you're fine i wanted to ask one car related question to you because i'm going to be in the market in the next two. I'm not a car guy. If you were looking for like a midsize SUV, you don't care about the style. Your MO for this is it's not going to break down, not going to need a lot of maintenance. I can kind of beat the shit out of it if need be.

What would you go to? Can I take a guess before you? Sure. Forerunner. I was going to say, do you ever need to go off-road? I don't ever need to, and I don't opt to. So no. Snow?

No. No snow. No snow, no off-road. Snow, yes, there is snow. Yes, snow. Okay. I would say, I mean, there's a lot of options, honestly. Forerunner, yeah.

Is that what he said, Forerunner? Yeah, Forerunner yeah like uh like what is that what he said forner yeah forerunner uh and then uh i think cost of ownership is low it is very low resale value is very high yeah they they run a long time and they let and they they get really good resale um you know grand cherokees are really are very nice now i love i i've i've done a lot of off-roading in the grand cherokee it's really good um you know it's uh simple but effective the the honda pilot and the honda ridgeline are both like utility tools and they're pretty basic but they're really well engineered and stout um if you wanted something from germany the Q5 is all right. Although maybe not necessarily the long term.

I wouldn't go German per se. I don't know my cars. Who makes the Q? Audi. Okay. So, 4Runner and Grand Cherokee are your two options. Those would be my two choices for a midsize SUV, I think. If you have a little more money the the

range rover volar is pretty cool and looks awesome if you wanted to go a little more to the luxury side and if you want to do something sportier jag f pace is nice if you wanted to go cheaper uh maza cx5 is pretty nice um if you want it a little more interesting, the Alfa Romeo Stelvio has some character to it. Interesting. Sporty. No, no, no. Alright, Taylor. Just practical. No, I'm holding you to it. A Highlander, a Toyota Highlander,

or a Honda CR-V. I like the Highlanders. You're making your choice right now, Taylor. Who's in the lead? Highlander's in the lead right now from the research I've done. And the fact that it's bolstered here by a real car expert makes me think I'm on the right path. Toyota Highlander is a great functional car for a non-car person that'll probably last a pretty long time. Yeah.

But also, if you wanted to check something else out, Grand Cherokees are nice, too. And 4Runners are a little more off-roady but they're nice too see the problem with the grand cherokee is i always like my cars to be i just like to buy them in black like i don't like to do any fancy just regular black and my dad and my brother both own a own a black jeep grand cherookee like 2015 or 2016. So it's like your destiny? Maybe it will be. Maybe we'll pull up to every family function looking like a bootleg Secret Service.

It's just not very good. That'd be like what the president of the Congo is protected by. We just have to make them believe they're bulletproof. What are they going to do? Shoot the door in the lot? We actually did a whole debate about that, my friend,

because I was sold a car that was in theory bulletproof, and of course it was not. And Rob was like, the fuck were you going to do? Shoot it in the guy's driveway? How do you verify that something is bulletproof? It's something that you literally could never find out until it's already too late.

Kyle, do you know how to tell? This car, it keeps lions away. Have you seen a lion near the car? This is the kind of thing Kyle might know. Shoot it. Oh, okay. You put your bulletproof scanner on it. Yep, checks out. No, you fucking shoot that shit. You put your bulletproof scanner on.

Yep, checks out. No, you fucking shoot that shit. Have you ever watched the documentaries on presidential limos? Those things are beast. Oh, hell yeah. They're kind of interesting. They're super heavy. And if you ever watch the president get into the car, the doors are like eight inches wide.

They're bomb-proof, I think. Yeah, they are bomb-proof. bomb-proof, I think. Yeah, they are bomb-proof. The Beast is the current presidential limo, and it's a Cadillac looking thing, but it is scaled up. So it's

a Cadillac on a GM Topkick chassis, which is a GM 6500 Super Duty chassis. It looks like a sedan, but if you want to know the scale the headlights are actually escalade headlights but on a sedan looking thing so it's all and the wheels are truck wheels so it's all everything is scaled up it's fucking huge i've seen it in person it's so big that's cool yeah i i I love that Donald Trump has that thing.

It's so good. The Trump presidency has been the most entertaining than any movie or TV show over the last two years, honestly. I watch it nonstop. I watch it nonstop, but it makes me so depressed, though. You probably feel like such a badass in this limo. I'm just going to Wikipedia. These are awesome. Yeah, the limo itself is really awesome.

Oh, Trump's in it. I'm just going to Wikipedia. These are awesome. Yeah, the limo itself is really awesome. Oh, Trump's in it. I'm just sorry. If you look at this picture, that's clearly Trump and Melania. Are there pictures of like, oh, this is just like a. I think you had a bunch of hookers piss in that, too, because the Obamas rode around it. What is that green thing? He probably got his own new one. Yeah, I would guess.

What green thing? In the door. The green thing underneath. It's in front of Donald's feet, I would guess. In the door. It's in front of Donald's feet. That's bomb-proof. It's like those blast deflectors from an IED. Okay. I don't think that he got a new one, Kyle,

because it says here that when they get rid of one and retire it, they'll destroy it, partially to show how effective it is at not being destroyed. And then when everybody's had their fun, they're like, alright, now bring in the real stuff, and they just shred it. Yeah, they don't want, I'm sure they don't want a lot of the specifications

to get out. I mean, obviously there's an exploded view here with lots of descriptions, but they really don't go into... Look at that! The defense accessories, pump action shotguns and tear gas. That image is showing a 12-16 shotgun though, which is... You said that was terrible in your video.

No. They're fine. You're thinking of the UTAS. The 12-16 is just fine. But that's exactly what they're depicting here. I really hope that's not what they're using. I mean, it's fine. I wouldn't necessarily trust whatever this source is. What would you arm them with?

Accurate imagery. AA-12? Yeah, what would you put in there, Kyle? The Secret Service uses, I know some of their tactical guys use the Honey Badger, honestly. The 300 blackout, integrally suppressed little AR. I don't know, a shotgun's not a bad idea, because presumably if you need a weapon in the car, the threat is really close, right? Yeah. I'm picturing if this is getting attacked, it's going to be like that

scene in Black Hawk Down when everybody's showing up at the wreckage and they only have pistols left. Okay. I wonder if there's a self-destruct feature on it. Seems risky. If there was, they wouldn't tell us.

I seriously doubt it. I wonder about the Air Force. That's enough proof for me. So you're saying there's a chance. There is a non-zero chance that it can self-destruct. I wonder if there's an ejector seat. I'll tell you what, I bet

driving that thing is fun as fuck 100 yards east It doesn't have specs on the engine in this picture It's the diesel, it's the 6500 diesel Yeah, it's diesel The thing is so heavy

you couldn't have a gas engine Yeah, what does it weigh do we know? Like 10,000 pounds? 10,000 pounds? The doors on this are armor-plated, 8 inches thick, and the weight of a cabin door on a Boeing 757 jet.

But does that mean anything to you? It doesn't mean much to me, because I would guess a jet door is as light as it can be. Well, I mean, but that's on a jet. But as light as it can be. Have you ever seen the bathroom doors on a jet? Oh, I'm sorry. I was under it. They're bullshit.

Okay, well, bathroom door on a plane. Yeah, you can put your foot right through it. Don't talk about the ones where you close the hatch to fly away. Everything about the plane is as light as it can be. Yeah, I just looked it up. 14,000 pounds, not 10. Jesus. Fuck me. 14, I just looked it up. 14,000 pounds, not 10. Jesus. Fuck me.

14,000! My car can't even tow that car. I thought Woody was saying that Trump and Melania were, there was a photograph of them. No, this is an artist rendering of them. And Trump is giving you the OK symbol with his left hand.

Is that like the white power okay? It's almost like the circle game. It seems kind of like he made you look. Made you look. That's how I see it. He really is doing the white power okay. That's fucking crazy. How about that?

I didn't know there were different okays. No, it's all the same okay. I think all okays are white power okays now i don't know where that really came from but it came from uh from another thing from 4chan where they're like hey wouldn't it be funny if we convince people that what nice was actually wp for white power and they were like this is so dumb people will buy it and people bought it and so now then it actually but now but now it is though that it'd be then it outran them and became a real thing right is that okay for it to be a real thing like i i don't know i go both directions on stuff like

that like it can be adopted for example when you argue that the nazi symbol is not the nazi symbol because it predated them or something i'm'm like, no, no, no. Now it is. Yeah. But I don't think okay has reached that standard yet. If you said like, hey, this now means victory for the Third Reich, then people would be like, well, no, it doesn't. But then enough people would be like, oh, this really upsets those idiots. Yeah.

And that's all that it is. Troll the libs. Trying to troll. But that picture there of Obama getting out, because that was the first one that came up, tell me that doesn't look like an airplane door, Woody. It totally does. And look how tall Obama is, 6'3". Look how tall the car is compared to him.

Yeah. It's so tall. We know he's 6'1", sure, because we had a conversation the other week about which president would win in a fight. And I think we all settled on Lincoln. Because he was 6'6", and a professional wrestler of sorts. Bro, you don't think Teddy Roosevelt would smoke Lincoln? Young Teddy Roosevelt. You don't think Teddy Roosevelt would smoke Lincoln?

Young Teddy Roosevelt. Rough rider Teddy Roosevelt down in Mexico in the lava pits. Fucking up and down Mexicans. But I want, during the term, I want peak president, not peak lifetime. Does that make sense? For example, if hypothetically Biden was a professional boxer boxer but becomes president at 78 not the winner yeah because we looked like the argument of their best fitness at any time in their life i think we came to like gerald ford because it turns out that he was built like a refrigerator college football yeah he was like a super athlete right yes you have to go when they were president and so i think

gerald ford was past his prime. Lincoln, he was still wrestling. I think Bush was one of the fitter modern presidents for sure. Obama just blew everybody away. Obama is definitely the fittest. The fittest modern president. My history doesn't go back that well. Does Clinton fit in office? No.

He tried. He would run to McDonald's. The president is a jog with the Secret Service. He's going for his jog, and he goes into McDonald's and gets himself a Big Mac. All the time. Yeah, it used to be like a repetitive story. Secret Service

had to go in there and secure a McDonald's car. Gotta love it. No, I'm coming. We're doing a 4K today. I got a carb load. And Bill Clinton's weight would go up and down. And so here, I'm on Facebook.

I've mentioned this a couple times. And it's become my thing to, like, fact check people who write all this shit on Facebook. Oh, people love that. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I make lots of fun. So anyway, someone puts up there that bill clinton paid 850 000 to paula jones uh to like civilly to quiet her and bill clinton paid 150 grand to

who's who's the the playboy one i forgot her name what's her name well anyway not not stormy dan, but the Playboy one. He paid $150,000. Oh, Trump, Karen McDougal? Thank you. Yeah, Karen McDougal. I thought we were talking about Clinton. And the point is that Trump is a better negotiator than Bill Clinton.

So I was like, oh, I got to fact check this. Adjust it for inflation. It's true. It's true. Bill Clinton did actually pay 150 grand to silence his Paula Jones and of course Bill Clinton really yeah and yeah and it was like a civil

thing and he just paid it to get his to get her to stop like pressing charges and Trump paid 150 grand to silence the playmate so Trump got a better deal I bet if you adjust for inflation Clinton got the better deal. I bet if you adjust for inflation, Clinton got the better deal.

No, he paid $850. He was paying $90. And $850 in the 90s. Way more money. Over a million. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is a booming economy. 1990s tech bubble.

$850,000. I'll tell you something, Hillary. That's expensive pussy. Real expensive shitty pussy. It's better to pay $850,000 or have to fuck Hillary Clinton for the rest of your life. It's a good thing Hillary Clinton is a cattle baron expert.

Or they wouldn't be able to afford those expenditures. I don't know if people get that reference. Yeah, well Hillary Clinton's a criminal. So somehow she played the stock market with cattle commodities. She played cattle futures. And she invested. I know she did.

Is that what really? She really did? So what really happened is she played cattle futures. And I want to say she put one grand in. But I could be a little off. Maybe she put in 10 grand. And she exited with over 130 grand. And she expertly picked.

You know how the stock market goes up and down? She wrote it up and then flipped it and made money on the way down and then flipped it and made money on the way up again. She just couldn't lose. She basically did like a Marty McFly type thing. It was almost like she knew what was coming next. Yeah, the sports on the back.

Ever do that exercise yourself where if you're like, I invested here and I sold here and then I went short stock here and then I'd make that much. Well, she did that. So I think Matt, like you, I tend to

side with the blue team lately, but probably like you, they have their flaws too. Oh no, for sure. Look, I was fucking 12 when clinton got elected you know i i wasn't paying attention to what the hell was going on you know i i read about the blow job that was the extent of what i knew you know so yeah um i'm not the biggest hillary clinton fan either such things are not cheating i think i was kennedy in there i don't know

yeah no it became a national debate he told monica that he wouldn't fuck her although i suspect he did because he just wanted her to blow him because that's not cheating i don't believe he did because like she the way we know everything right is no listen listen the way we know everything where everything came out is because she was confiding in um linda trip right oh she was confiding in her friend telling her what was going on about the dress, everything. She'd have told her friend all the nitty-gritty details. She would be like, oh, yeah, he stuck a cigar in my pussy, and I blew him, and he came over all of my blue dress.

It's been going on for a while. But then leave out the fucking? Like, no, no, he didn't fuck her. He totally had some sort of, like, he probably... I just wanted some head. You make a strong argument. Before you stick a cigar in some girl's cunt, I usually would want to fuck her.

That seems like a couple steps down the line. What if you've got this thing about you that all these other actions are somehow not so bad? Because that's what he was saying. He told her that if she blows him or gives him a handjob, then that's not cheating like fucking is.

I feel like that must have been like a spike in thought process because no one today is like, oh, yeah, my boyfriend won't be mad. I just blew that other guy. You know, Clinton made it like nobody today thinks that like you getting jacked off or a blow job is somehow not cheating. And nobody before that thought that, you know, like I don I don't think it changed any kind of national discourse about it. There was a conversation about it. You know, people, I mean, so at the time, like terrestrial radio was the big thing. I drive home from work and people are discussing

whether or not blowjobs are cheating, whether or not oral sex is sex. Sex. Yeah, that was the thing. It's totally sex. Yes. That's such a silly thing to discuss. What about foot job?

Okay, let's keep going then. Let's keep disseminating. What about a foot job? Yeah, that's sex. Yes. That's such a silly thing to discuss. What about foot job? Okay, let's keep going then. Let's keep disseminating. What about a foot job? Yeah, that's sex. What if I put it in your armpit? Is the penis out in a wreck? Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's a sexual act.

That's cheating. What if I'm wearing my underwear, but I'm dry humping the fuck out of the crease of her buttocks? The penis is hard. Oh, it's so hard? I want to go next. It's chafing. Wait, wait. Taylor so we're harvey weinstein here i'm in the shower you're watching me i get turned on by this i'm jacking off while you watch that's not rape because i get a career where i make tens of millions is it sex oh uh it's definitely cheating if i were in a relationship

because like at the very least that's like an emotional level of cheating and a level of distrust i think that would be unacceptable but they didn't have sex if they didn't have contact that's what i'm getting from you oh it's not sex but it's definitely cheating i would say what if my if any of you have a girlfriend or wife and she goes hey i was getting a gig you know don't worry you can quit your job i'm gonna be rolling in it for a while after what i did tonight but he jacked off in the shower and i watched in its entirety would you be like oh all right honey it's all good you'd be like no what the fuck what's wrong with you why would you that's degenerate how much money will you be

what type of mercedes what if my kink is that I like getting kicked in the crotch really fucking hard. I'm fully clothed. She's fully clothed. But she's kicking me in the crotch repeatedly and I ejaculate. The fact that you have a fetish for that makes it sexual, which makes it cheating. Because it may not be a traditional sexual act, but the fact that you're getting off on it makes it sexual which makes it cheating because it may not be a traditional sexual act but the fact that you're getting off on it makes it cheating like what you're saying is if your girlfriend so so you wouldn't be okay with your girlfriend kicking a guy five times in the crotch

if he was going to ejaculate if he was going to enjoy it and that was his kink fuck no weird as shit really but but there were but you would have a separation between that and like one of the traditional sexual acts i wouldn't be cool with any of it but i do agree there is a gradient on which it can kind of be you know what if what if what he likes what if what really makes him come is if she spits on him okay he's lying on the ground he's naked he's not touching himself and but she's spitting on him and that turns him on so much that he ejaculates. I feel like this is, yeah, it's the exact same thing as the nut-kicking. It's like someone I would think is very insulting

and being spat upon, probably unpleasant. But if that's what's getting that dude off, then it's a sexual act, and she's engaging in it with a guy who's not you. That's cheating. Damn, you're pretty strict. He's really spent a lot of time considering the options all the cup no yeah I believe Taylor has a pretty simple like you know like litmus test

you oh do you like it is it sexual it's cheating yeah I think it was very reasonable to you know she likes oh this gets into something I saw today about furries. Do you know what furries are? They're people who are dressed up in black costumes and fuck each other, and they're degenerate, and it's one of the things that the left and right in this country can clasp hands and say, we don't like these people. We don't like them. Is there a furry gender coming down the line?

Is that why? Is there a new gender for furries? Absolutely. Of course there is. So, we've talked about degenerate sexual shit before, and YIF Y-I-F-F is a term where furries will have sex with each other or do sexual things with each other, and I found a

that I know that Kyle won't even know. It's called YIF in Hell. And it's basically showing all the degenerate, fucked up shit that a lot of these furries are doing. And they're trying to do stuff around kids where there'll be a parade or something and some guy dressed as Goofy will pull his cock out in the middle of it. And it's really just American unity, out in the middle of it. And it's just,

you know, people from, it's really just American unity, which is why I love it. It's people from all sides of the aisle coming together and saying, let's get rid of this. Well, if they keep their dicks in around the kids, that's okay. Who cares if they fuck in fursuits

as long as it's cocked in around the kids. One of them was a furry who dressed up in his furry outfit and was going, oh, I'm going to have another fun day at the children's hospital, going around, talking to kids, touching the kids, hugging the kids. And then he posted more pictures of his furry costume covered in semen from times that he'd been engaged. I'm on here. Go to Top All.

Go to Top All. What yeah that sound like i'm go to top all on yiffin hell i am the one two three four five six seven eight highest thing ever the title is world war ii veteran only unleashes the full power of his two world war winners chambered in in 45 ACP, to defend his anus from rapid chipmunk. That's me. That's great. Congratulations. So proud. That's fantastic.

My comment on there, Kyle, is I miss FBS Russia. Oh, that's great. I like that you were able to hit that explosive. What you described before sounds like a pedophile in a fursuit and not so much a furry, right? I mean, it seems like, just looking at a lot of these images,

that there seems to be some bleed over, at least in some sections of this group, where there are quite a few images of furry people trying to do these things to wither around children and then also a weird kind of intersect of like nazi furries where it'll be someone dressed up now it's getting fun but they've got like an ss badge and uh in a swastika behind them and it's, do you not think, like, do you think that if you were walking around in 1936,

Hitler would have been like, oh, yeah, this is what I'm going for, people. Was the animal white? Or just animals and fakichats in the street. Like, no, he would have, you would have been first in line, my friend. He would not have cared for that. Hitler might have disliked furries more than Jews. He just needed a better fall guy.

He only liked bunnies and polar bears and Siberian animals. He liked white animals. That was really it. But think about it. Looking back at the 30s, if it wasn't the Jews, it was like, and we are going to eliminate these perverts dressing as animals fucking around children! I'd look at them today and be like, you know, the guy's got a point.

I don't want two people dressed as pandas fucking outside of a daycare. Do you? Well, certainly not. Hitler did a lot of bad things, but he was pretty on target with the gypsies and the furries. Oh, Kyle gave me a look. Hitler did a lot of bad things, but he was pretty on target with the gypsies and the furries. Yeah. Oh, Kyle gave me a look.

Yeah, like there's going to be the gypsy people coming after me. Oh, the gypos are coming. Yeah, yeah. They're going to line up. They're going to be riding shit people. Do you have anything that you want to pimp or shout out before you head out? Thank you so much for coming. Not really.

TheSmokingTire.com, all the things. If you're into watches, I got a podcast called Watch and Listen. I guess that's a couple things. Those are the two things. I want a Submariner with the blue face. That would be the white gold. Or the yellow gold. They're very nice. It's like $8,000, $9,000. How do I get it

a little cheaper than $8,000, $9,000? Buy it used and go to Crownandcaliber.com. Crownandcaliber.com? That's my sponsor. Thank you for letting me plug them. That's my sponsor for the watch podcast. They have a really nice selection of secondhand luxury watches. Like Rolexes.

Very nice. That's a green bezel. That's a Hulk. I'm sorry, a Kermit I'm 99% full of shit but I do have a question does anyone make cool altimeter watches yes actually a company named Oris

makes a mechanical altimeter watch and they also make a mechanical depth gauge watch and they're both super super cool and considering you fly those paragliders paragliders, right? Yeah, that works. Yeah. What's it actually called?

Paramotor. He's got an engine on his back that powers it. Right. There's an Oris watch that is a mechanical altimeter and it's super, super cool. Yeah. Huh. I'll play around with that. It's reasonably affordable too. It's like it's

less than $2,500. Yeah. Tops. cool yeah huh i'll play around with it it's it's reasonably affordable too it's like it's i think it's like 2500 less than 2500 yeah tops yeah um they're really nice i just did a uh an episode on that that podcast uh on watch and listen on the entire history of oris and they have some really interesting innovations actually cool company so yeah check that on youtube and the smoking tire.com and videos about cars and podcasts about cars and etc etc thanks for having me though yeah we'd love to have you enjoy the rest of your show let's do it again soon for sure man good night see y'all later well that was fun i enjoyed him a lot it was fun talking cars that guy really knows his shit. He does.

I'm glad that we discovered this little website. I'm not going to plug them anymore until they pay us to do so, but god damn. I really am going to get one of these cars. I'm not going to spend like $4. Oh, the rental one. Yeah, I'm going to get one of these Porsches

probably or an Aston Martin or something and go have some fun. Do you have something to let us know about first, Kyle? Yeah, I could do this ad read. Tell everybody about Postmates. Postmates is honestly perhaps my favorite sponsor. It's the one I use the most. We always use the coupon code here. But this episode of PKA is brought to you by a company

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Now, I just love it. I love Postmates. The Postmates has such a huge list of restaurants that they work with. I used to use Grubhub. That was my go-to for delivery food. But Postmates has maybe triple as many. It's excellent.

So check them out. Kyle is a huge fan of Postmates. Yes, I've used them too. They're great. It's a great way to eat when you don't want to leave. Never want to leave.'t want to leave never want to leave ah man so i had a interesting time looking at this yiff in hell subreddit today and i just it's so absurd so ridiculous it's hard for me to believe that it's real you know like you know

those corners of the internet where there are like established communities but it's so bizarre that you're like this can't be real there's no way it's just not but i guess it is oh man this this thing you linked here is so depressing taylor oh yeah the the image macro. So basically to describe it to you guys, it's a guy in a furry outfit, looks like a dog of some kind, and he's got a Santa hat on. And it's an older man, clearly the father of that guy,

and the mother of that guy. And they're sitting there just with the most dejected, sad looks on their face because their son has become totally degenerate in this hobby or fetish, whatever you would call it. And the commenter here pointed out, look at the shelving, look at the food they have, look at the size of the spacing and the light hanging there that's kind of off or the light switch, what have you. These are low-income people. They don't have much.

This guy probably did his best to raise his kid to be as good as he possibly could despite working long hours for not much pay and then the the the result he gets is the son being like oh now i'm going to dress up like a santa dog in all of our family photos so i can be a constant reminder of your somewhat failure as parents you know they're always going to have to wonder, am I a failed parent, or is my son just a degenerate who just wants to ruin family photos and dress up and fuck other mascots? I feel like it would be so easy to beat someone up if they're in one of these suits. Yeah, and we would never advocate that,

but if a furry put you in a self-defense situation, if a furry came at you and he put you in a self-defense situation, what are you going to do, Kyle? You're legally able to defend yourself. He's coming at you. I think if we're going fist to cuffs, I think you want to move a lot of lateral movements because he's got a very narrow field of view, right?

You want to left and right. Work the body real hard because that face is the most padded part. I feel like you could really tear this person apart. He can't get a good grip on you because his hands are all furry, right? But every bit of him is a loose thing that you can grab and pull and tug and pull him off balance. Would you shoot them like dozens of times in the head and torso in self-defense? Oh, God. I thought we were going hand-to-hand. Are we going to have to gun this furry down?

He's got a pipe, and he's coming quick. Oh. Never bring claws to a gunfight. Oh. Certainly not. Especially if they're fake. Fake claws. Yeah, you've got to stay on your ground. I guess he looks through those eyes.

His visibility must be horrible. I have no idea. He can't see the look on his parents' faces. That makes me so sad for the guy and the mom. Yeah, that's super embarrassing for everyone involved. I'm so glad

I'm not one of these people. I want to see the look not one of these people. I want to see the look on the furry's face. Oh, he's smiling ear to ear. Is he just happy as fuck in there, or is he also a little disappointed and wished he wasn't himself? He's a self-absorbed douche who thinks that he's being brave right now

by coming out with this nonsense, but really he's just ruining his family. This is who I am now. Oh, that's what we should have asked. What's his name? The movie guy. Your movie sucks? Yeah, we should have asked him

what his family thinks about it. I don't think that question ever came about. Did you guys see that other post on there? That was a screen cap of a Twitter poll they did to see who is okay with cub porn. Is cub porn where you fuck a person dressed up as an infant animal? Yeah, it's where you'd want to look at drawings of very young childlike animals, or you'd want to fuck a young animal. I'm okay with cub porn.

Me too. Like here's my thinking on it. One, no animals are harmed in the imaginary rape of drawn baby animals. I don't know. And then if it does escalate into real life, like living out the fantasy of

having sex with young animals, eh. I don't care about that either. Oh, I don't know. I eat veal. But they don't want to... I think I care if some guy's fucking... Please. They don't want to fuck the young animal, though. They want to fuck people, but they like when you're dressed up as an animal.

Why is it okay to eat an animal, but it's not okay to fuck an animal? Right? These are the questions we should be asking, Taylor. Taylor, I just feel like your value system's all fucked up. When you're right, you're right. God put them here for our youth. Now I get to decide how I want to use that animal. Maybe I want to

put a little marinade in there before I have dinner. Alright? Oh, last time we talked about people who draw young kitty kind of porn, like cartoon shit. we were talking like i think last time we came down it was like well if that keeps pedophiles from engaging in real acts then that's a good thing and let them do it but like the more i was thinking about that

the more it's like if you're indulging the desire of these pedophiles to fuck a child and you constantly let them get that hit then they're gonna be more drawn to do it in real life like they're not gonna divest that interest they're going to eventually like it seems like it'll just become too much they'll have too much of a tease and they'll have to get more so i feel like i've changed on that a bit really so you don't so you're a cold turkey advocate as opposed to a divert your sexual energies guy i I don't think that when they watch that, I think when they watch that, what they're doing is they're simulating why they like the child porn.

They're getting their release without a victim though. Right. But they're, they're training themselves to only get released from that. And they're going to eventually go out at possibly and act on this in real life. They'll go, man,

I've been doing this for a year and at first it was great but i just couldn't get enough it's got to get crazier it's got to get more i mean you know what maybe i will act on my my desires and i will go out and do this so it seems almost like a temporary holding cage for potential you know rapists or pedophiles that will eventually break free of that cage when they just aren't okay with that level of risque anymore do you apply the same thought process to rape porn to adults but we're simulating the rape of a person you you absolutely must do you apply that target thought process to people who do target practice against paper because it's really jerking off to drawn images is target practice

against paper that's true but i like the rape porn thing is a little different but it's also different in a way that i don't think you're anticipating kyle rape porn isn't one of the most popular male searches it's one of the most popular female searches so most of the people watching rape porn i don't have any stats or data for this it's just a hunch like most google women love rape porn i mean like bdsm like rape fantasies like that's that's more of a woman thing than a man thing yep well yeah when you're right you're right can I say? And so I think that that's not quite the same, not quite equal. New data

reveals that women in their droves are searching for porn with tags like extreme brutal rape, forced, and rape. Yeah. They should have left with extreme brutal rape and then tapered it off. A quarter of straight porn searches by women are for videos featuring violence against their own sex.

Me too. Who was that comedian? Was it Louis C.K. who was talking about being with a woman and he thought it was going well and he tried to fuck her and she kept pushing him off and then the next day he talked to her and she was like well yeah i wanted you to you know kind of kind of take me kind of rape me and louie was like you know what i'm not gonna i'm not gonna rape you on the off chance that this is what you're into like i'm not gonna be like oh i bet she she's really okay with this let's do it like no no too risky but that's not surprising at all women are attracted to dominance like even if it's that kind of that sounds like something jordan peterson would say you have to clean your room

you know fight the dragon you're your dad. I like Jordan Peterson. So I've listened to him a little more. He has a knack for saying things and making me feel like I already knew and believed that. Right? They just seem obvious and intuitive and that you're, I don't know, in this social justice warrior denial if you don't line up with the way that he does. What I get from him, first of all, social justice warrior denial if you don't line up with the way that he does. Oh, go ahead. No, no, you go ahead. First of all, people who try and paint him as offensive or

risque at all, I don't get it. He doesn't say anything off-color. Pretty much everything he says is totally inoffensive. But I think that the reason he resonates so much with this current generation is... he doesn't bow down to the easily offended no i would argue yeah but then also like i don't think

that the people who get hyper offended over teeny little things are the mainstream like i think that's a fringe on the left or the right like i don't think that's a giant group of people um but i think that he basically just kind of repackages in an easily digestible form lessons that your dad or the man of your house should have taught you. Like, hey, get your shit together. Clean your room, as trite as that is. Do this and that. Always be looking to the future.

Make sure that you're prepared. Be ready to start a family. Don't fuck around until you're 38 and then wonder why you're sad and depressed. You haven't been having agency for your life and your decisions. Like a lot of this, I feel like as a generation who has grown up with record levels of fatherlessness in the home. And so these very novel ideas of masculinity are like, oh my God, I'd never considered that before. Because like the public school is so angled towards girls against toxic masculinity any form of assertiveness or or aggression is squashed and so i think it's really speaking true to a lot of guys who grew up in this

this generation it's interesting to have him deliver that message too like it so he's an interesting guy to be the one that delivers it in that like when i when i hear his voice i mean he's heard this a million times there's a little bit of Kermit the Frog element in there. For sure. Right? And if you look at his body type, it's pretty much the exact opposite of LeBron James, right? Yet, if you listen to the core of who he is, he's very much like... Macho isn't too far off the mark, I don't think.

You know, he doesn't believe that masculinity is toxic. He thinks it's okay. He would tell you that women like a guy who has some sort of value and who can do things and who is a producer. They value a guy who is a doer and a protector and an achiever. Those are kind of old school masculine 1950s thoughts. I don't even think it started at the 1950s like that's what they try and portray it as now as though they're like oh back to that archaic 1950s and prior yeah where there's so many valuable things you can learn from your father from the man in the house that boys just aren't taught anymore partially because

you know in school or wherever, they're taught that just by basis of being a man or a boy, that they're going to develop into something that is intrinsically bad. That, oh, masculinity, that doesn't have a positive connotation. That's negative. You need to eschew all of those masculine traits because people don't want that. Oh, look at this sitcom where there's the cute girl dating the lithe, semi-feminine boy. It's like

they're trying to teach people a way that the world doesn't work. Women love masculinity in a relationship. Straight women. Yeah, straight women love it. The overwhelming majority of women who are straight. That's bred into them. They love it. That's something that I just think so many young

guys are being led off the path by buying into Hollywood and corporate nonsense of like, oh, yeah, you want a happy wife, happy life. Am I right, fellow pussies? It's like, no. Sometimes you have to put your foot down, and that's something that women really respect because women will try and test the boundaries of a relationship to see if you're actually the kind of man who will stand up for yourself. They'll do little pokes and prods, and that's not a bad thing for women. They're making sure their man is, you know, not a pussy. And they're standing up for themselves too, right? You know, maybe when they push back, it's not just happy husband, happy life either, right? There's a partnership in there. Yeah. And I'm saying that people misattribute, I mean, happy wife, happy

life is true, but they're misattributing it to be happy, meaning you get what you want all the time, versus happy being no slims. You have to have a stern hand and say, no, I'm not going to bootlick for you. I'm going to, you know, this is a relationship. A stern backhand?

Is that what you're saying, Taylor? A stern backhand. I have five reasons we're not going. Women appreciate a stern backhand. I have five reasons we're not going. Women appreciate a stern backhand. They like to be kept in line. Yeah, there's no evidence for that other than, well, I mean, it seems like that's not quite hard enough for him, Woody, given the porn results Kyle just pulled out. You need to be brutal. Extreme brutal.

You need Chris Brown techniques. Oh, yeah. you know extreme brutal you need chris brown who was the one that was it um harley maybe who was like you know you've got chris brown on your ipod yet you hate harley b weinstein and i'm like yep and yep but i really like that song that's good it's really catchy let's uh let's watch these what do you got does the first clip have the edit though because i like the edit yeah yeah yeah i think we want the edit i think it's funnier uh we were we did some gaming last night at shit like 4 a.m my time something like that 5 a.m maybe 5 a.m. Maybe 5 a.m. My time. We played for three or four hours, played some PUBG.

And man, we went for the crate. We all drove up to a crate. And this happened. You know, we four men, my little four man squad. They have an ambush. I'm a cute up at zero. One moment. Let me refresh mine.

Maybe I didn't want to play the first time moment. Let me refresh mine, maybe. It didn't want to play the first time. It still doesn't want to play. What? Ah, there we go. Okay, I'm queued at zero. Three, two, one, play. Oh, God.

Don't throw any grenades. Ambush! Mitty just decides it's a lost cause and starts killing us all. So Mitty was the last one standing. The last one to be killed, yeah. If he kills you, does that steal a kill from them? We thought it did, but it appears in this case that I'm looking at the kill feed. It looks like they got the kills.

I see three kills there. Maybe, I don't know who that was he killed. Possibly stole it. Every time I see an upload, Middy is the hero of that clip. They're his clips? Yeah. Look, man, you don't see winners making excuses it's always that's true i choose to believe he's the the best yeah

it's time and time again midi is like clutching it for you guys are we watching another one or i like the second clip too? All right, we can watch this one. Yeah, this is I believe this is Correct me Chiz. I think that you're you're shooting and Midi's driving No, no, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Midi shooting and Chiz is driving This is this is one of the the whenever this happens in PUBG I fucking love these moments because this is like some Mad Max shit. This is a vehicle chase.

I'm at zero. Three, two, one, play. I'm leaving. I'm going. I'm looking around the car. It's like that video we watched earlier. Yeah. Keep shooting, buddy.

Thank God he has a suppressor on that gun. Keep shooting, Midi. Thank god he has a suppressor on that gun. Keep shooting, Midi! Don't let me down, Midi! He's driving very well here. Drive smoother. They chose not to shoot me! Dude, I got out of there with my MK. Nice.

Damn it! I would've been a hero! Midi, get out of the car, Middy! Yeah, got him. That was so cool. That was so cool. Who was shooting? Are there guys near you? I killed three of them. Middy did awesome.

Yeah, he did really well. Yeah, we won that game. Based on my not educated view of the game. Yeah, we want that one. Once again, MIDI carrying you guys. I can already tell that that stupid fucking presidential limo

is going to be one of those rabbit holes I go down on the internet where I just want to learn more and more about it. That's so cool. Such a condensed bit of technology. I saw a suggestion for a bit for us to do more about it because that's so cool such like a condensed bit of technology but anyway uh i saw a suggestion for a bit for us to do on the subreddit and we can't do it right now but it have to be like a little bit of preparation for it but it was a conspiracy theory thing

where they suggested we all bring to the table for a discussion a real conspiracy theory not like one of like the oh i'm gonna do um the moon's made of cheese or chemtrails like pick a real one and we actually have to do our due diligence and research it and try and convince the other two that that is the reality of it and i don't be shitting on chemtrails thing to try now now to be i would like like i wanted to pick a real one i'm leaning towards 9-11 but i'm not sure where i'd want to go because i want to delve way deeper than like those uh idiots who are like you know yeah i'd have to look into tower seven and all that but there's so much nonsense i mean that's that's kind of the whole point that's why i'd be a funny bit.

I think it's a good idea. Tower 7 was my first instinct, but it's not the one that I want to dive deep into. I want to look into the Pennsylvania plane being shot down by American forces and approved by Dick Cheney. Well, we would each pick our own conspiracy theory, and we'd have to come to a table with it.

I would rather... Maybe we can coordinate offline but see if i dive into that and i don't convince myself i want the flexibility to go into another direction oh i don't think most of us are going to convince ourselves like but it's about it's about presenting it as though you're convinced to try and convince the other two like what i would want is for you and kyle to bring up like points that are so salient about something i don't know much about like jfk or whatever that by the end of it i'm like well fuck maybe like maybe this is real i thought that would be interesting and it would

it'd be pretty thought-provoking so yeah i i think i think there was a conspiracy to kill jfk jfk do you want jfk kyle no i I'm not claiming that one just yet, but I do believe that conspiracy. Definitely so. There's so many reasons to kill him. Whether it's the military-industrial complex, whether it's his vice president, whether it's the FBI, whether it's the Cubans or the mob is what he just said. There were a lot of people who wanted Kennedy dead. the Cubans or the mob is what he just said. You know, there were a lot of people who wanted Kennedy dead. And then the fact that like his brother gets knocked out right, you know, a few years later, it just seems like someone did not like what the Kennedys were trying to do.

Yeah, that's, that's definitely an interesting one. So like that would fit into what I'm saying of like, you know, quote unquote, real conspiracy theories, like ones that actually have a little bit of, you know, stick-to-it ones that actually have a little bit of you know stick-to-itiveness where you can get going with it and look at stuff where it's not just you know and the thing you need to know about chemtrails is they're real they're terrible they put fluoride in your air now people i'm telling you chemtrails isn't so far-fetched when you start looking into that one i mean that that sounds stone cold retarded to me but if you have like like a real kind of thing to say, then I would listen to that.

I'm just saying it won't be as funny or entertaining for listeners if we jokey do it too much. The entertaining part will be the trying to break down a real conspiracy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm down. We'll coordinate. We'll all pick one. I haven't settled on anything yet uh at the top of my list would be uh maybe jfk maybe like some sort of weather manipulation uh system because cloud seeding is a real thing maybe kim trail since you threw that one out there a couple times i think there's some good evidence for i was using that as like a ridiculous one i know you were and yet to to you know make that one sound legit, I feel like would be very effective.

See, I like 9-11 because that's one where I really don't buy any of the conspiracy shit about it with what I know now. And so it'll all be new to me. Aside from that stupid Popular Mechanics or whatever interview where those loose change retards were like and those steel can't be melted by that fuel burning and the guy's like well actually the structural integrity of that grid of steel starts to deteriorate around this temperature and keep in mind it wasn't just the fuel being burned it was all the supplies in the office and which means that the temperature would have realistically been around and like he just debunks all of his stupid shit like and it doesn't have to melt see See, that's the thing everybody brings up.

It doesn't have to melt. It has to get soft and malleable enough to not be able to hold its load anymore, and then you create sort of a chain reaction. But Tower 7... I never bought the whole, you know, whatever it is, jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,

but I did see it on YouTube, and it really convinced me. The guy had a bonfire with jet fuel, tried to burn a steel beam. Didn't work. Didn't work. And then he put a weight on that steel beam while it was suspended. And like you guys said, the instructional integrity of it was... Look, it happens.

So I want to look at whatever conspiracy... Other than those conspiracies, the other ones about it. We'll see where it goes. Yeah, it depends what your angle is on 9-11 as well. Like there's the angle that, oh, George Bush had the CIA put explosive charges in the building so he could go after, you know, the Middle East and get oil, et cetera, et cetera. That seems probably unlikely, but what could be is,

I mean, it's where the Tower 7 went down, right? It's also interesting that all of the hijackers made it through security the way they did. Maybe someone allowed them to get through the security. But the planes definitely hit the towers. Like, we've seen it from so many fucking angles. That happened. Like, there are people who want to make out, like, the planes didn't even hit the towers, right? Now, one thing that's interesting is when people suggest that there

weren't people on those planes right that that those planes were remote controlled into the towers and stuff like that see like like that that's why this is would be an interesting fun thing to do it's because we're trying to convince ourselves of something not maybe maybe necessarily for real, but for the sake of the show. Anyway, I thought that would be interesting for us to do. Have we all seen the video of, I want to say, is it Dan Harmon? I may be getting the two Rick and Morty. The baby rape? Yeah, the baby rape.

And then Justin Roiland, the other Rick and Morty guy, was drawing pictures and cartoons of baron trump naked now that's that's excessive yeah see you can do it though look it's tasteless okay it's tasteless but he can do it he can do it no reason he can't do it i mean i would say you shouldn't be able to do it because it's an underage person and that's pretty fucked up. I'm with Kyle on this. It's tasteless. I don't like it. Barron is not a political player.

He's off-limits. We should leave him alone. Having said that... I don't think you should be fired for this shit at all. Once you start fucking with First Amendment rights, then there's a slippery slope argument there. Well, don't swim as a private company. They have a right to fire anyone for immigration. Yeah, they...

I really don't like the trend of firing people for jokes when both sides know that it's a joke, but when it's not to their, you know, position, they'll feign ignorance. I really don't like that trend. So, everyone knows i watch

politics like sports sometimes and and it is a good day when you're offended oh fuck yes you know i i could be offended by something the other team just said and and i'm gonna go on cnn msnbc fox news and wherever else will have me and tell them how offended i am and how terrible this person is for having offended me it's a position of power and they, the both sides do it. I can't agree with you more. Like it, it is interesting now that like,

I mean to deny the fact that this has been happening to the right wing way more than the left, like forever up until now would, would be dishonest. It, it, it's all like in the last decade, it's pretty much, you know,

outrage machine against someone who's a little bit on the right and they get fired. And now that it's all like in the last decade it's pretty much you know outrage machine against someone who's a little bit on the right and they get fired and now that it's i don't agree with that off the cuff i mean i'd have to look into it but i'm like jesus like fucking everyone in hollywood that's been nailed seems to be on the left and some of those me too things are not that big a deal i mean you guys have argued that's why i set up until now. I'm meaning now like the Me Too era. And so for so long there's been a trend of, oh, this guy did something we didn't like. Get him fired if he's kind of right-leaning. And then now people on the right are going, oh, well, we'll feign outrage too and we'll do this bullshit.

And I don't think that it's productive because all it's going to do is ruin comedy. If everybody from both sides is constantly saying, oh, this is offensive. Yeah, on the inside, in parentheses, we all know it's not really that offensive, but it really expedites my political agenda. It's very frustrating. I would rather people just be able to joke about whatever the fuck they want and

keep us laughing instead of getting bogged down in this horse shit. But, yeah. I can't find the right video but uh it it was it was pretty i thought it was a little funny i chuckled uh i didn't think it was that bad i think it was that big of a deal uh it's pretty ridiculous that they're going after him this way i thought it was super ridiculous that they took guardians away from james gunn i think his name is uh i'm pretty bummed about that can you tell

i don't feel like i understand in detail what he did some sort of pedo joke 10 years ago yeah pretty much they they dug up like 33 of his old tweets and they were all sort of like i don't know one of them was my my the shower my hotel last night felt like a three-year-old boy peeing on my head you know it was so weak um there were lots of them they were just sort of tasteless not funny by the way that's that's one thing i gotta say like like none of them made me laugh they were just uh in poor taste usually about like kids or something like that you know some sort of pedo kind of joke but dude the fuck like it was like admittedly when you have to go back and delete 10 000 tweets you probably made too many pedophile jokes or maybe too many pedophile

statements but like it's yeah jazzy deleted 10 000 tweets uh well they're probably not all pedophile jokes no no not probably just deleted his history. Well, he left 20,000 up. So it was somewhat selective at the very least. I can't explain that. Yeah. But regardless, push comes to shove. I would rather people be able to, like, I don't like the way it was presented. Because some of these you're like, oh, that's pretty fucked up.

But then it would be like, you know, those tweet collages they do where it'll be like a million of them and like the first three will be like somewhat good and like a nice example and then if you read like in the middle of it you're like this is this is clearly a joke this is clearly like them fucking around and so i feel like that's what was happening oh yeah i i think most of the more jokes i don't think this guy's actually a pedophile. No, of course not. They're all jokes, and none of them are funny. What I'm saying is that's the real crime. Three really harsh jokes, and put them there in the collage,

and then fill in the rest of the space with very obviously jokes to try and be like, you know, because the person's going to click, read a couple, and be like, man, this whole thing is full of the same stuff. All right. I think I agree with Kyle's stance that if the jokes were funnier, this would all be fine. The Hardy Boys and the mystery of what it feels like when Uncle Bernie fists me.

The hotel shower is the weakest ever. Felt like a three-year-old was peeing on my head. Three men and a baby they had sex with. Hashtag unromantic movies. See, that's funny. What that is, there was one of those hashtags, unromantic movies see that's funny so that what that is it's it's you know there was one of those hashtags like unromantic movies and and he's just three you know he's three men and a baby is obviously a movie i think tom selleck yeah it's good movie and he's just adding that

and the baby they had sex with what is this honestly the best policy tell your three-year-old you're laughing thinking of me fucking 3PO. He'll appreciate it when older. Like, I don't get that, and it's not funny. Eagle snatches kid is what I call it when I get lucky. Not one of these is funny at all. No, no. Which was the big mistake.

He should stick to what he's good at, which is writing sci-fi movies and directing sci-fi movies. And he should leave comedy to someone else. He should probably have had someone else running his fucking social media. What's James Gunn need to be on Twitter for, right? I have no idea. I'd never heard of the guy up until this point. Did he direct the other Guardians of the Galaxy?

Yeah, both of them. It's his shit. Fuck Disney, though. Fucking Walt Disney was a Nazi sympathizer. If he were around today, they'd be voting him out. They'd be firing his ass. So fuck Disney and their bullshit. It's just stupid. That's a conspiracy theory I saw online that Disney's Frozen, that movie,

was made to obfuscate the fact that before that, if you were to search Disney Frozen, you would learn about the fact that he had his remains cryogenically frozen until like we got rid of the Jews or something like after he died. Like it's obviously very silly. Like that would be an example of a conspiracy theory that we wouldn't bring in our little conspiracy thing. Does that,

did that make sense? Did I explain that? Yeah, you did. Yeah, they were trying to, the whole thing was an SEO play. Yeah. Yeah. Well, it really was an SEO play. Yeah, yeah.

Well, it really paid off. Yeah, I think it worked. It was a roaring success. I liked that movie, honestly. You watched Frozen? You haven't seen Frozen? No, I'm an adult man. I don't have any kids.

Well, you're a faggot. Let me tell you, Frozen is what men watch, okay? Manly men with good senses of humor. Secure men. Secure men, all right? With big cocks. We watch Frozen. This is explaining a lot.

That's right. No, I watch Frozen. Like, I didn't see it when it was new-new. We got the DVD or Blu-ray or whatever, and I watched it at home, and it was like, this is good and um christine bell i guess is in it do you guys know her yeah kristen bell okay she can sing and i guess i knew that she could sing a little and i kind of knew that everyone in hollywood can sing a little but she killed it she was great in that and uh of course

it wasn't demi lovato who actually did the other role but you know it was the fat woman who they didn't who just played the cartoon and she did great too and i'm like in the the plot it was pretty fun and stuff and and like i think there was at one point like the little girl wanted to get married because she met the perfect guy and they're like that's ridiculous you just met i was like oh they modernized this a little bit you know yeah yeah yeah i have nothing against it i don't know shit about the movie i just know if it's a musical i'm not i will not partake it's a disney it's it's a disney movie like like there's a there's like five musicals i haven't liked disney disney

movies since i was a kid don't like musicals first of all all, musicals are awesome. I love musicals. Musical anything. Did you like Shrek? I liked the parts of Shrek where they weren't singing. Oh. Then Frozen might not be for you. You know? Because I think some of its highlights

were in the music. Was it only as much of a musical as Shrek was? Or the majority is not sing-songy? I would say there's four or five songs in there. I would say five, six songs maybe. The thing is... In an hour and a half movie? That's not a musical.

The main thing is that the main song is iconic. It's great. It's really good. I can't... Put your eyebrows down. I can't be that good it was my theme song for a year it's great it was it's iconic it was probably on the billboard charts or something they probably sold that shit as a single like like everybody knows that song my daughter can sing that song really well uh so my daughter she was in musicals in high school

she got the lead in her city was pretty neat. During auditions, she used to sing that song. She was especially good at that. I like when I see parents slip in little braggy things about their kids. It's very unironically sweet where they're like, oh, she did this and that.

She was the lead. They keep going. I like that. It's's you know it's nice and i also like kyle on the opposite end of the spectrum how devoted you are to really bring in the word faggot back and you know all my weight behind you best of luck i think every episode of this show you're doing a wonderful job bringing that word back you guys can't see it because i don't have kyle focused enough hold on kyle please hold your pose uh just there we go never give them up well chis if you listen to me for three minutes on the show you know i'm never giving retarded up no i'll never give

retarded up i'll never give faggot up i'll never give up retarded faggot like like any no no those no no don't take my language away don't don't don't make me less descriptive when i when i call you a faggot i mean it i was i i've used that word in my head recently i what happened what was the situation that put you over the top? So Boogie2988, most likely. I don't know. Terrible branding. We all know Boogie, right? He plays the center of the road on every issue that's ever to have been an issue.

And he was talking about gay marriage. And Boogie, I think in his heart, is actually pro-gay marriage. And he's pro-gay rights and he's on that twitter he's very clearly pro-gay pro-gay rights all but in an effort to kind of play it down the middle he was like hey i'm for gay marriage but let's slow walk this thing right maybe not right away maybe we start with civil unions i'm extrapolating a little bit and just do gay marriage down the line. And this is, you know, sort of play in the middle.

That's what he does. Well, like, the gay rights people came after him hard. And they just started, like, going at him. Going at him all over Twitter. And he's apologizing. And they're not forgiving him. And it's like, oh my god. You people are attacking a guy who's actually on your side.

He's one of your own. He's not the guy you should be going after. Go after fucking Pence or something, who actually doesn't like you. Boogie does like you, and you're attacking him, you fucking faggots. Right? Suck my dick.

Faggots, you'd probably like it. Stop attacking. No, no, no, no, no, no. Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope probably like it stop attacking did we go too far associate the word faggot with homosexuals that is not what it's about are you sure what's that about kyle can you give us a concise am i doing this wrong kyle assholes they are scumbags they're annoying pieces of shit they're bad people okay they're low class these are gay faggots. See, in my head... They are. They're assholes.

They're being very mean. They're attacking someone who shouldn't be attacking. Somehow this conflates. This side ball story. We went to war with Iraq. And this lefty, good-hearted person went to Iraq to support the victims that we were attacking

and they killed her and their parents came do you remember that their parents were like you killed the wrong person that person was there trying to help you you know they were like a human shield for your city and you killed them for it that's kind of what happened to boogie here right he he was on their side he and they killed their own human shield see like the thing he should know with like getting involved in like political shit on twitter is like if you make a middle of the road assertion you're gonna get hate from one side and hate from the other that turned out to be true a right-leaning left-leaning one like at the very least you're going to get agreement from those people but like the best way it seems to get a bunch of hate on twitter is to make that middling

of the road like that middle of the road response because like he would have gotten the same group of responses if he had gone way further to the Christian right and been like, and they shouldn't be able to get married or do this and that. Those same people would have come out of the woodwork and attacked him. But they attacked him as well when he was a centrist. You have to know, people on Twitter, they don't have good, they're not going to be reserved, rather, in how they attack people. If you're even a little bit off of what they like, they're going to come at you.

And so when you make what you think is a reasonable centrist position, you're actually going to be getting hammered from both sides. Whereas if you have taken one side or the other, you know, I'm not saying if you believe truly down the middle, don't say that, do it, but you're going to get just as much hate. I hope that I get attacked on Twitter for my defense of Boogie

because I'm not really on Twitter. And what will happen is it will be like February 2019. It'll have blown over, and I'll be like, huh, what'd you look at that? They were mad at me last year. Yeah, I don't think anybody cares about that in regards to Boogie now. No, Boogie's a pretty likable guy for the most part like i don't he's in the dog house again i thought he was the guest soon like

i it just keeps a list of like guests we have coming up and he was on it and then i don't know what happened but uh yeah poor boogie is in the doghouse again with more drama. And here's another one where I feel like he's taking more heat than he deserves. There is a passionate... I saw his tweets. He's absolutely taking more heat than he deserves. He doesn't deserve to be taking any heat from this. It's not unreasonable. There's a passionate group of people who are always looking for reasons to fuss at Boogie.

And Boogie, I don't think any more than I ever was, is really wired to resist a passionate group of people who are fussing at him. Apparently what happened is he dated this girl. Remember when he was on the show, he was like, hey, my ideal girl would be like a petite, you know, little porn star, whatever. He had one and wasn't telling us.

He was dating a, have you seen her? I've seen her. Okay, yeah, yeah. So, all right, look, she wasn't... She wasn't a beautiful petite 10. She was a... Don't pull punches, Kyle. You're the one leading the charge.

I'm bringing faggot back. Go ahead. Yeah, no. She's a rough-looking chick, you know, and some low-class porn. Yeah, whatever. I did not actually see her in porn. I haven't seen her. Yeah, here. She's a rough-looking chick, you know, and some low-class porn. Yeah, whatever. I did not actually see her in porn. I haven't seen her.

Yeah, here you go. I'll hook you up right now. But I saw her, like, snuggled up next to Boogie in a picture, and I think I saw her in something else, too. And it was like, huh, she's not a bad-looking girl. So did you want to jump in? Boogie's problem with all the Twitter hate, because I've seen him get hate on Twitter for a long, long time. I follow him.

I obviously don't see most of his stuff, but I see a good deal of it. And Boogie's problem, Boogie, if you're listening, it's for you, buddy. Stop apologizing after tweets. tweets. When you put your piece out there and just let it be heard, do not go back and say, I didn't realize how this would upset X group, Y group, Z group because blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And this is why I regret it or something. Don't do that. Because those people, they're not looking for an apology. They're looking to be outraged. And when they see that apology, they don't see, ah, end of story. On with my life. They see, aha, culpability, guilt.

I'm going to go on you harder now because you know what you did is wrong, and I'm going to hit you for it. Stop apologizing to these people. They will never be satiated with what you say. Fuck them. Stop indulging them. Let me lay out where poor Boogie is as I say this. He dated this girl.

She was a cam girl, maybe porn star. They're all calling her that, but I don't know if she was actually in porn. She fucked in porn. I linked you to the video right there. Okay. Well, then now I know. Actually a porn star as well.

And it seemed like they liked each other. She says she liked him, that this was not just some like sugar daddy situation that they had it was though that's where they met she said that she developed real feelings for him and the complaint she had about him all seemed in my mind to revolve around the idea that he was jealous he would be like i want you here all the time he didn't want her home doing cam girl stuff. And I think it was because he wasn't truly comfortable with her job.

She said, you don't like my job, right? She's getting this vibe from him. And he says, no, I used to work in the porn industry. He did some, I don't know, websites or something like that as proof that he was okay with it. And he was accepting of who she was. But I think maybe the core of it was like in his idealized world she would stop doing that because he really liked her and he didn't want to share and um then

you know she had a bunch of other complaints like he used to unload on her emotionally you know talk about his vulnerabilities and and his sadnesses and she would listen and support him but not reciprocate and it's like uh you know this just sounds like someone who broke up with someone she was there for money he was there for pussy one of them got what they wanted that is the crux of the issue okay he got he got a million percent right now laying it out strong she got some hand-me-down loot crate shit that's what she got he was he was like oh i got you a little gift here here's a here's a john snow boba fett funko pop oh look it's pikachu you like him right happy anniversary you whore you know that's exactly what happened here i didn't watch the interview or anything at all that he did on drama alert or with this girl wherever she was interviewed but uh i'm gonna go

ahead and take the side of a boogie and what he said this was i i mean i don't know exactly what he said but it makes more sense than what she would say where she's gonna probably feign uh an augmented sense of interest and be like oh yeah i thought we were gonna be together forever i thought this was gonna be this and that and he abused me and and i watched the first minute of her video but even the topic like even given the topic she was so boring i didn't care it was hard to listen to yeah it was like i just don't fucking care you you have sex on camera for money and now you're pretending like this guy who's independently successful is somehow tied to you he's he's obligated to deal with your shit like no no no you don't get to do that and it's exactly what kyle said kyle laid it out more clearly than anyone could he wanted sex

she wanted money and that's the way it's you know the cookie is currently crumbling i think he wanted emotional support i think he wanted the relationship i think that Boogie's wired to want those things. And she was there for that too. I think she did listen to him as he talked about his childhood and stuff like that. Does that not sound like something Boogie would do in a relationship? I don't know. You never know what people are like in real life. But you can look at his history with his wife and whatever. She was as much sort of a wife as she was like a support system.

So it would make sense that he would be hungering for replacement to that sort of support system, that emotional support system, especially for someone as emotionally damaged as Bookie has been throughout his life. So, yeah, it sounds like... And she did it during the relationship and then complained about it afterwards. And all the time I heard of it, I was like, oh, this is just someone who doesn't like you anymore. It's kind of... Oh, she likes him. she wants to get back in there she wants that money um because because i i guarantee she got out of this thing and she probably profited like two thousand dollars or something like that and she was hoping to get twenty thousand dollars or

something like that oh although i don't know what he was like like paying her from the sugar they totally met on like a sugar daddy like website like That's totally what was insinuated. Can I interrupt on that? Several times, they were all like, you know the website. No, I'm not that guy that knows that website. I'll link you. Oh, so you have an educated guess on how they met? Yeah, absolutely.

Do you know or do you have an educated guess? Which one is it? You all but know. The second one. But it's so strongly insinuated that, like, it's just... They met on What's Your Price? Or they met on Seeking.com. Can you say, like, what is What's Your Price?

The girl goes on there, and she basically puts a price tag on herself, and guys go on there and rent her. So it's like that site for cars we were looking at earlier. Yeah. Exactly like that. I did not. I've never heard of this. Oh, yeah, man. So these are like amateur whores. Basically. No.

AKA women. It's called... We need a little insight into the Kyle psyche here. Kyle, it's called What's My Price? What's your price? That's one of them. I'm not suggesting that this is indeed the exact website that he used, Boogie used.

But there are a number of these sites. There's Seeking.com. Seeking is short for SeekingArrangement.com. And the arrangement is a Sugar Daddy arrangement. Here's a link to that. I have to sign up? Absolutely. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

I'm not going to log in. Somehow I can browse this site and it's fine. No, then we looky-loos. But to log in and create a register is cheating on my wife. I don't know how that works, but yeah. I'll sign it up. Here, I'll read the three steps to guarantee a first date. Your journey with SeekingArrangement.com starts with filling out a profile about yourself

and who you'd like to meet and what you expect in a mutually beneficial relationship. Then, if you're a sugar daddy, there are four or more sugar babies vying for your attention. If you're a sugar baby, our website features more certified and verified wealthy men than any other. And then, of course, you're set up in a personal meeting. And an in-person meeting is the best way to find the best range. Who knew I could get in with eatshit at eatshit.com? All right, let's see what we got here wait that didn't work no it did i'm in eat shit at eat shit.com got me in ethnicity how did you guess that is that seeking arrangement he just made it up i just made it up yeah i'm a i'm a few extra pounds and athletic

i am seven foot here sugar baby stop co here doesn't require anything you can just get right in there and browse god damn it why didn't you link that one first i'm going because i because i don't do this shit hmm i mean maybe i should sugar babies dot wait sugar dating 101 okay sweet pea here is a pretty thing i'll share with everyone what is a reasonable sugar baby allowance to ask for? Depends what the girl looks like. Yeah. And what's expected. You're assuming that it's like a lease payment on a car, right?

But it could be as simple as like, it could be as extravagant as like sending her on a shopping trip and being like, yeah, whatever you want. It depends what kind of lady you're picking up. The quality of your sugar baby. It could be a grand a month. It could be a grand a month. It could be 10 grand a month. How many women are worth 10 grand a month? I mean... Borderline zero?

Money means different things to different people, right? There might be some Wall Street guy who earns 10 grand by Monday. See, that's that's fine because i am not a sugar daddy i don't have sugar babies so now you're just paying for a guy oh there's a dude here sugar mars he's actually a handsome dude yeah you'd think so oh yeah sugar mars is good looking dude huh i'm gonna message this guy please look jay hay 29 from the philippines looks like that golf bag boy from it's always sunny in philadelphia sugar baby i am a sugar baby female looking for a sugar daddy so what should my username be once to suck cock deep pockets six six six you know i here's gay woody again but i feel like the guys on this site are better looking than the girls

now not that there aren't some pretty girls because there are there's some but like this baby me x no baby love girl like some of these women i wouldn't take for free well you know not everybody can be so selective as a mr gamer tag well my stupid fucking username of wanting to suck cock is too long so now i changed it to uh me want penis eight get me started you know all right annual income i'm the sugar baby i got i got no income there we go oh you're you're setting up a sugar baby situation yeah yeah profile headline what should my profile headline be? Oh, you can go to interests.

So there's a whole bunch of chicks that want to go on cruises, vacations, travel. That's interesting. That makes a lot of sense. So that's what you'd want is one to go on a vacation with you. Now I'm even more interested. Now this chick says she's told she's a catch. I'm not taking you to Denny's, much less a vacation. Get out of here. Whoever catches this woman better have a strong back.

Right? Check this one out. She's right near me. Bam. You know, does your Skype do a thing where sometimes when you click on a link, it doesn't open it? Instead, it just scrolls up? Yeah, mine does that does it anyway yes kyle this woman i believe i could deadlift her there's one over here with four children with her in her in her profile picture all right my

profile headline is i want some fuck and about yourself in your own words, I said, I love pets, adventures, and I'll probably like your dog more than you. Winky face. That's great. This is good. Between the ages of 18 and 80. I believe if I grab this woman by the shirt sleeve and the panties, I could deadlift her. Actually, you know what? I'm going all the way up to 90.

Get a farmer's carry. Yeah, you'd need some lower back strength. This woman, lovely Twinkie. Oh, wait a minute. Woman? I haven't found one of these. Oh, I haven't found one of these that I would want to pay for yet. Can you imagine paying

to have sex with a woman who's like middle-aged and already has four children? I'm very confused. If a twink says they're a woman, do we have a penis in here? No, twink means a gay man who's like small. You got to re-watch that episode of Sunny where they explain all of this.

Okay, okay. Look, judge for yourself. Tell me what you see in here. Because she kind of looks like a woman to me. Where do you see Twink? Her name is lovely Twinkie. Yeah.

Well, Twinkie is not Twink. Oh. Maybe I'm reading into something that's not there. It's also not helpful because she's from Botswana oh that's aids yeah yeah i'm not gonna be delving into the i'm not dipping my pen in botswana ink i just shake dicks with ice beside before i would fuck her all right he's definitely got aids oh this woman does the thing that makes her prettier with the dog ears. I'm going to get... Wait, this is a Prego chocolate vixen?

That's what I'm talking about. Does she think that increases the value? No birth control required, baby. Hi, I'm sugar baby chocolate vixen. I'm very open-minded and outgoing, very adventurous and fun. I'm currently expecting a little sugar baby of my own. Oh, I get it. She's pregnant. But I'm single, super sexy, and free.

Please contact me. I want to experience new people and this new website. Yeah, shoot for the stars with what your child can achieve. Maybe someday she can be an online whore like you. This chick is 27, 5'7".

She's a Christian. Very important. She's bi. Alright. She's near me, right? No, she's near Woody up in Salem, North Carolina. Well, Woody, let me know how she turns out. What's her name? Prego Chocolate Vixen. Oh, she's sweet.

I like her. Yeah. Yeah. And she puts out, obviously. That kid will be mixed. And no birth control, as we've... Yeah, she's birth control negotiable. Well, you can't get her pregnant, clearly.

Well, you think so, but the joke is that that's my baby. But now I can't, now that she is... Right. You guys haven't linked a single person so far that I would want to have sex with. That's what I've been looking for! I'm not even talking about paying. I'm saying if I met any of these women at a bar and they wanted to fuck. Yeah, honestly. Some of them are

kind of cute, but then kind of trashy at the same time. I haven't found one that's a pretty, respectable-looking girl. Oh, hang on. I like that he's like, I haven't found one that... Oh, wait. Hang on. This is okay.

This is all right. She's 21. Slim. 5'5". Bisexual. Young and fun. Former cheerleader, looking for a sugar mama. Now, you can tell this is a real American writing because of the no spaces on either side of commas. You thought that she was gay, right?

She's bi. Oh, okay, because her thing said she's looking for a sugar mama. Every single one of these women is going to put bi so that they can play into your fantasy of a threesome. Found it. All right, so this is the chick. This is the chick that I'd probably negotiate with. Alley cat. Right?

It's not spelled right. You know, nice little pun. Oh, okay. Yeah, right? All right, fair enough. It's the bottom, the bottom her bottom her butt no it's her okay the whole package you like mostly the bottom for me i think her face is really i i think her face is pretty but sh, I thought the last one was at least as pretty.

Now I forgot what she looked like. I think she's just as hot as Alina. Alina. Well, you're wrong there, my friend. You gotta get your eyes fixed if you think that's the guy. Oh, look at the profile picture. Oh, I'm looking. Very pretty. Come on.

Not even close. But her eyes say she does. I think Alina is prettier. Yeah, Alina is definitely prettier but this is not an ugly girl this is a pretty girl who definitely never had a father in the home so

you're going to be an easy in and I say easy in despite the fact that she's posted her personal information on the site meant for requisitioning male suitors so there we go I've scrolled through like 50 of these chicks and she despite the fact that she's posted her personal information on a site meant for requisitioning male suitors. So there we go. I've scrolled through like 50 of these chicks, and she is definitely the hottest one yet. Do you think that they tell themselves in their head at night when they're trying to fall asleep that they're not a whore?

Some people probably aren't worried about little moral quandaries like that. I think she probably thinks of herself as like someone who's figured the game out. No, but it's still whoring yourself out. It's basically a tacit implication that you're going to get to fuck me or do sexual things with me if you take care of me and pay for things and buy me shit. Oh, like marriage? Well, yeah, except in that case, the wife stays with you and you raise a family together,

whereas in this case, she's fucking another dude exactly like you who thinks that, you know, who doesn't think of the last week. No, not necessarily. You can, like, buy her forever? Yeah. Rent, you can lease her. It's just like leasing a car. You just lease a woman until she hits 30,

which is when we know women go rotten, and then you turn it in, and you get a new one. All right, your leasing example with cars made this a lot more logical to me. Okay. The old if it flies, fucks or floats thing. Yeah, absolutely. She's only 20, so hey, Kyle,

that's a 10-year lease you're looking at before she goes rotten uh i'm i'm looking for like a two-week commitment that seems expensive which is that it was a whore i'm looking for a whore you're the one who's looking for some sort of relationship you weirdo kyle i think that two weeks might be expensive. I bet you could get her for a month for the same price you could get her for two weeks. Hell, you could, like, it seems like if she wants, I don't know, say she wants a grand a month, right? You could pay her $500, and she might let you go four weeks before she realizes that you're just fucking her for money. Does that make any sense? You could go into debt with her and she'll never collect.

No, I think it'd be a lot more expensive than that. I think you'd have to pay this chick, you know, four or five hundred a night if you were just getting her on a short-term lease. It's probably going to cost you five grand a month at least. Huh. And you pay the whole month up front?

Because I'm trying to go into debt to get a discount. No, we're doing this shit in installments. that makes sense because otherwise she could just stop fucking you yeah you just just just leave right you know that's what i'd do that'd be my move right you pay five grand up front she's gone then what are you gonna contest her with your credit card yes i would imagine you pay these six cash we write a check what do do you put in the description of the check? Pussy. That makes it a contract, right? And if she doesn't give it to you, then she violated the contract.

And it also makes it a crime. We covered half of these laws in business law school. We didn't cover paying for sex, but we did talk about checks and contracts. I'm a bad lawyer. I gotta say, I'm much more interested in spending a little money on renting this Aston Martin for a couple hundred dollars and going

and having a good time in that than I am in renting this chick for a couple thousand and having a good time with her. Am I wrong? I didn't see the girls name their prices. They don't name their prices. You're going to have to negotiate. The price is different. Your price is different than my price is different than Chiz's price is different than Little Mitt's price. That makes sense.

That's great. Women are terrible negotiators. That seems sexist. I'm offended. It's my lucky day. We're shopping for whores. That's literally linked in one of the reasons that feminists will say that women are paid less. They're like're like well it's because women don't negotiate as much but in that case it's okay to say taylor you're right if i were wearing a pussy hat people would applaud that

statement instead of being mad when people ask what you did in the trump era what will you tell them well i tweeted a lot and wore a pussy hat. It looks like a cat, right? I don't know how this hat looks. It's like the pink little... Does it look like a labia or a cat? It's the one that when you saw men walking around in it, you had a visceral

shame on their behalf where you're like, oh, oh no, you're wearing a pussy hat? Do you think any woman here is looking at you and going, man, this kind of guy who folds and believes exactly what I tell him to, that's the kind of strong man I want to bear my kids, or to bear his kids. But I'm looking at it, they're definitely replicating a cat here. That makes me feel a little better.

Yeah, but there's like the double entendre. I would wear a cock hat to that thing. Oh, well, you're in luck. There's one here. It's just Oh well you're in luck there's one here It's just like that silly cat in the hat Leaning to the side Look where it's just a big dong But I would have like a way to like Pump it up

And make it erect when I wanted to And it's This is only one step behind Tilk as far as level of goodness In an idea. So let's hold on to this. I roll them out. I roll them out. Do we have any good AMAs we want to talk to?

If Woody, Taylor, and Kyle were thrown into an island battle royale style, who would win, and what would be your tactics? I'm going first. I said this weeks ago when this question, months ago probably, when this question came up. I said that I ago when this question, months ago probably when this question came up I said that I would partner with Woody we would kill the much younger

and fitter Taylor and then I would turn on Woody I would probably do that and fall for it see Woody you would fall for it if not for this guy i would go in explain to you kyle's ruse you know i would even i would probably uh indulge the love like your ego in being a good fighter and allow you to be like hey we gotta get rid

of kyle he's playing you against me it It's not going to work on this island. Here, you know all the expertise. You take him out. You would be flattered by my tacit admission that you are very good at that. You would go do it. I would grab some sort of rock or stone or something. So once you were exhausted from killing Kyle,

I would murder you. But this ego-filled version of Woody, I think think would see Hulkadurka as the second strongest guy So why Would I partner with second strongest guy When one and three could team on him And now I'm left with three

On my own You're just offering a bad strategy Yep No, the way I would express it You'd be very convincing. Okay. This is how civilization games go as well. Look, I've played enough civilization to know how this goes.

All right? There's three of us playing. Oh, tell us, Mr. Civ. One guy is warping ahead in technology. The other two start private messaging. Got to do something about this guy. Taylor's just got free pottery. Look at him over there.

He's got tanks and shit. We got to do something but meanwhile the back of your head like and as soon as we do do something you're next like that's that scenario the place matter of fact you're doing most so i can sit here and stockpile i like how both of us our only strategy was to go to woody to try and convince him of the other side. Because I know for a fact, if you came to me in that situation, I wouldn't believe a word out of that lying serpent mouth. And you wouldn't believe a word from me. And so Kyle and I immediately know,

that sort of alliance isn't working. I don't buy your bullshit. You're not going to buy mine. No, it only works if I'm like, look, forget all this. Let's build a raft and leave Woody behind. Let's get the fuck out of here. He's crazy. He's painting his face with this. Let's build a raft and leave Woody behind. Let's get the fuck out of here. He's crazy.

He's painted his face with shit. He's got a spear. He's only been here for 43 minutes. He ripped his clothes off. I know. I know. He seemed useful. He's got an addle addle. He's got an addle addle.

I'm puzzled by the fact that he decided to build a surfboard first, but either way, the fact that he can do it. In the end, none of us would be winners. You guys both came at me together. I am confident that I could kill Kyle before it all came to to be how would you

kill kyle probably not i think if we come on you i think if any two of us came against the other guy that other guy's fucked oh yeah absolutely be fucked you're right i'm just me one is so overwhelmed engage woody at all if at all possible like i know he'd grab me or whatever, but in those few seconds, because I'm faster, that I can get on Kyle at the very least. What are you going to do? Hit me a few times in the head? Woody's going to be choking you unconscious during that. Not for the first few hits.

I could take two or three. Maybe. What are you, Tyson? You're going to kill me with three punches? Please. I'm going to have a patchwork, almost Wolverine-style glove of driftwood that I found. Taylor, have you ever been in a fist fight? Yeah.

Okay. Did you win? Yeah. Yes. But I would build some kind of... You know, I don't know how you would construct driftwood into something useful, but I've seen on TV they often make nice art pieces for the side of the room, so you can definitely

make a glove of sorts. Okay. Out of wood. Or maybe just grab a big stick. I'm thinking a bamboo gauntlet. A bamboo gauntlet. Thank you. Hopefully we're in somewhere in the South Pacific. We'll be. Where there's... He says with confidence.

Yeah, that would not turn out well for any of us. Sans Woody, probably. Movie 1 is so hard to win, no matter what it is. Even if it was just... If it's two men who are... If it was two men

who are kind of equally matched and one determined woman, it's still just so overwhelming to have another 120 pounds of person hanging off of you while you're trying to like throw a punch or move or do anything. I know like I'm being facetious. I might be undervaluing the 120 pound woman, but I feel like she's very fragile and perhaps dissuaded by the first punch.

You know, Kyle's like, I can take two or three and i'm thinking yeah i think he can but like 120 pound woman i think not a clean one not a clean one no she couldn't take it yeah i think she'd be dissuaded by a good hit but if like that's like you and i get like wrapped up right? It's not that you're fighting her and then fighting Kyle. It would be, I'm fighting Kyle. All my attention is directed at Kyle.

And then someone 130, 120 pounds, whatever we said, jumps on my back or grabs my legs or anything. Suddenly, even if it's only one limb, it's out of the equation for long enough for Kyle to get something in and beat the shit out of me. But the move is to remove her from the fight so it goes down to 1v1. But if I turn to her and turn my attention to her, suddenly Kyle's got my back. Back to, we can take two or three. I think my move in this is to prioritize that woman and get her out of the fight. Because if I prioritize Kyle,

she's just going to be there forever. Kyle, if this ever happens, we need to ally ourselves so that woody doesn't win because in both of our scenarios he wins i thought i lost in all these scenarios no because you're the one left on the island because after you know we kill kyle or after you guys kill me you're gonna kill the remaining one with your fighting expertise i hope and it's been a little while like uh all i could possibly hope for is that you get really tuckered out in the kyle fight that's pretty possible too there's no chance other than that like it doesn't matter how strong you are fighting's different when you add striking in as well it's you know i don't know what would

happen i i but i i think i'd win kyle's right about that, actually. I think that Woody and I would turn against you. We would kill you very easily. It wouldn't take very long. And then I would kill Woody. Yeah, it wouldn't take two people that long to kill me. Or you two that long. You're both my size. I don't think that you would kill Woody.

I think that Woody would kill you. Well, there's only one way to find out yeah well here we go the adventure trip the final alright well this is the Woody's game welcome to PKA 400 I killed him

I am champion show's gonna ruin PKA's continuation was if it came back and it was just me I am champion! Show's kind of ruined. P.K.'s continuation was if it came back and it was just me. Like, and... Alright, everybody. The other hosts are gone. You're wearing your ear necklace. You're wearing your ear necklace.

Four ears. Things go so well for the boys. 2v1 my ass. I've got my hot teeth bracelet. Looks like puka shells. You're like, what they didn't know is it was 2v2. It doesn't matter how hard you can hit in a 2v1. It's just you're going to get overpowered.

Yeah, it's too much weight. It's the weight, in my opinion. It's just all that person on top of you. It's the same thing that in some ways it goes back to you know the fighting a bunch of children if they ever get on you you know it can be hard to get them off yeah there's deranged murderous children like how much do six to ten year weigh. Probably like 500 pounds. That's a good bet, 500 pounds. With all the hormones in the milk, even more now. Is that true? Have kids started hitting puberty much earlier?

Absolutely, yes. Especially girls, yeah. Now with girls, I don't know if it's true, but I saw it in a documentary, so it has to be. They hit puberty at something like 105 pounds almost exactly every time. That's the thing that makes them... It's like a body fat percentage.

Yeah, that triggers it. I heard it as weight, but those two things are kind of related. So all you need is fatter chicks, and they hit puberty earlier. Maybe girls are hitting 105 faster than they used to. I've always heard it was the hormones and things like chicken. When I've looked into it, and granted it was very cursory like five years ago,

I remember it being like a body fat thing where it was, at least for women, not for men. But for women, it's like, all right, once the adult female body reaches a certain level of fat content, it starts triggering this whole mechanism. But I'm sure, who knows? I drink milk. Do you drink milk? A little. Very rarely. I do. I have it in my coffee. Oh, you guys don't like milk?

I like milk, but there's just no reason to drink it, you know, unless I'm eating cookies, and I don't eat cookies because they're terrible for you. I like milk, but I try to drink mostly water so that I don't eat cookies because they're terrible for you. I like milk, but I try to drink mostly water so that I don't get too fat. Yeah. I mean, I guess there's a little milk in this. What is that you're drinking? It's iced coffee.

I take, you know, it's like 12 ounces of coffee. I fill it up with ice cubes. I add a little bit of cream, and then I shake it. And this thing, like, keeps everything cold for 24 hours so the ice doesn't melt and doesn't ruin the coffee. Is that a thermos or one of those, like, workout things? Both. It does both. It's got this little round wire mesh metal ball

that you can throw in to make up protein. And it keeps stuff so cold and hot. Yeah, it's called a blender bottle. I've got two of those in sight. Yeah, I'm a huge fan of this. It was was 20 bucks and at first i was like ah i really but i love it i fucking love it the screw on top it's it's metal on the inside it's like i'll put this on my night stand i'll be drinking this at night and the next day like i'll get up and like go to take it to the kitchen and i'm like ah the ice is still in there it didn't melt does caffeine affect you at all can i circle back to the –

Oh, yeah. No, no. Go ahead. I looked it up. I didn't want to drop it. Why girls hit puberty early. This one has a couple of reasons, but a lot of it's fat. They said one of them is hereditary.

Like if your parents hit puberty early, you might. But all right, that's not going to be a trend. Suddenly all the early – it's not hereditary. Yeah, it's not going to be a population trend thank you so another one they said was the obesity epidemic which tied into what i had heard before that uh people were hitting it earlier another one they said was diet so i was like oh they're gonna start mentioning like chickens and stuff but nope they're talking about fruit and sweet drinks sugary drinks like soda sweet tea stuff like that it's so basically fat people, again, hitting it earlier.

And then another one, emotional stress impacts when a girl hits puberty. And then I guess parental conflict, parental support, depressed fathers, stuff like that are making girls hit puberty early. I'd never heard that one. Me neither. Yeah, that was U.S. news. Okay. Kyle, with how much caffeine i assume you

drank i don't know how much you actually drank a ton does it affect you at all anymore i don't notice anything i honestly don't notice anything when i drink no matter how much caffeine i drink because i drink you know probably six seven sodas a day and i drink probably three or four cups of coffee a day um i don't really notice it you know i just i'm always like this is what i've been drinking lately like i'll fill this up with like with coffee and i'll just keep filling it up all day um really it did don't you get like uncomfortably wired i'll get like that if i have i drink a cup of coffee like twice a month like i barely ever drink coffee yeah i drink this as i'm going to bed like i'm drinking coffee in

bed watching tv and then i just roll over and go to sleep i would be wired i would not be able to sleep if i drank a cup of coffee right before bed yeah i think that's true for most people i just drink so much of it i think i have like kind of a high tolerance for it i i to if i want caffeine like like when i'm on a road trip i'll get like a four pack of the big red bulls and i'll drink like literally half a gallon of red bull or something like that and that'll get me going if i have like a large like not what's large at starbucks like 20 20 ounces like large and like those yeah i think the venti is like 20 to 24 ounces somewhere in there if i have like you know a 12 ounce coffee and then i have part of another or start it i'll get like uncomfortably jittery where i'll be like

i'll feel like i'll start sweating i'll feel i hate that feeling it's terrible yeah the only time i get like a like a feeling like that as if i've taken if i take adderall obviously that's a whole different situation that's oh of course it is i took that in college you know to help study like when a friend had it was like hey try one of these and i never understood how people can abuse that drug because it's like it's like the antithesis of fun powderized and put into a capsule where it's like do you want to be really stressed out all day do you want to not be able to do anything but work and then when you're done working do you want to clean your counters that have already been cleaned for 25 minutes but then you have to dust and make sure

everything's right and then you won't be able to sleep that that drug is the worst the the ones you were taking were they like a capsule they were 30 xr okay was it a was it like one of those capsules that has medication inside and it melts away? Or was it like a solid pill? It was the pill that had a bunch of little balls in it. Okay, so that's time released. Now that will give you what you're describing. I've taken those before. It was terrible.

It was that night that I hung out with that girl and like was with her until the break of dawn, got zero sleep after a day of driving across the country. And then I had to work all day filming a video and I took one. And after like 7 PM, when we had worked all day long, I was, my, my, my friends went into like a Burger King or something to eat. And I was like, I'm going to try to go to sleep in the backseat of the truck. And I'm just laying there completely exhausted, but wired at the same time, just trying to go to sleep. And it's the most uncomfortable feeling.

Exactly what you're saying. I remember I took one at like 2 p.m. to like study all day for a neuroscience test I had the following day. And by the time like 11 p.m came around and i'm like all right got a good handle on all this content so time for bed can't go to bed all right i guess i'll stay up a little longer at like five six seven in the morning it took until like waking up time the following day for me to feel normal again yeah not even like exhausted just to feel normal just to feel terrible. It was terrible. I don't know how people

take that every day. It's baffling. I don't have those. I have just the blue instant release ones and those are in and out of your system a lot faster. It's also a much harder punch instantly. Really? I've never had that. It did nothing to me. I've taken one Adderall

once in my whole life and I didn't see a difference. Do you remember what kind it was? Like was it a solid pill or did it have like a clear capsule? I remember it being a white pill. Yeah, he took a solid pill. For me it's just a

if I have something to do, if we're going to do something, I'll take one and sometimes I'll take two. I'll take like 20 milligrams, which I know is still low for some people. Like there are people who take 50 milligrams or, um, you know, I don't want to throw Sam out of the bus, but I think that he was using upwards of a hundred a day or something like that. God, that sounds like hell. But like 10 or 20 milligrams, like you feel such a huge step up like 10 is like oh yeah i feel good i feel good i got energy i got energy let's go let's go let's do stuff 20 it's like i'm going to change the world here's what i'll do you start making plans like like big life-changing

altering plans like like big picture stuff right meanwhile you're cleaning you're cleaning you're taking stuff apart it's right after this stove i start my multinational empire yeah yeah yeah i very rarely take it uh i i haven't taken one and shit i don't exactly remember the last time i took one it lowers your appetite which to me is one of the most appealing aspects of it yeah kills it and it's not good because like the most appealing aspects of it. Yeah. Kills it. And it's not good because, like, the couple times I took it, it wouldn't be like, like, I wasn't doing it for weight loss. I was doing it to try and stay up or to try and study harder.

I don't know why I did it a second time. It was terrible. Like, you will go 14 hours without eating, and not until you get, like, the, you know, physiological response of gurgling and, like, feeling weak and lightheaded from low blood sugar will you actually realize you have to eat. Like, not only does it trash your appetite, you don't even think that you should eat. It's not the healthiest way to lose weight, but I feel like, I don't even know, I haven't done it, but if I had Adderall, I would have an easy time subscribing to the Kyle Crash weight loss method for 10 days, 14 days, who knows what. Yeah, I'm eating fewer calories a day right now than Wings is. Where are you at, by the way? I haven't weighed myself since, since one 94. Um, I, I, uh, I think I'm eating like 400 calories a day, something like that. I eat at midnight every

night. Uh, and then I don't eat again at all. Like, like zero, zero calories, uh, until midnight the next day. And by like, like I'm hungry now it's 11 p.m right now i'm fucking hungry so when i go and i eat this turkey sandwich with sat with um horseradish on it i'm gonna love it i chew very slowly i chew very slowly i enjoy every bite and i eat a i eat a pickle with it which is 10 calories so uh yeah that's been my routine for the last do you uh do you fill up with other super low calorie foods like rice cakes or celery or like vegetables or anything to keep your stomach feeling full i eat nothing i eat nothing but like i'm telling i eat one meal a day it's at midnight uh as soon as midnight happens and like it's technically the next day

i'm like i i make my sandwich or yeah i made that pot roast yesterday so i made like a and then the serving thing is really important too like the serving size is like this big it's like the size of my palm so i've got like this much meat a half of a red potato five baby carrots and that's it do you have a food scale no i don't i just kind of eyeball it i go by the size of my palm i i've heard that before that's it do you have a food scale no i don't i just kind of eyeball it i go by the size of my palm i i've heard that before that's fair enough yeah that'll do it for you as long as you're consistent man like you're making it too hard on yourself dude like you could roast vegetables or like saute spinach or do anything just to like fill your stomach up and you'll believe you're

full for way longer with like an extra 200 calories i take fiber pills during the in the middle of the day and they like super expand in your stomach that fills me up pretty good those those psyllium capsules something like that yeah yeah i've taken those too do they work yeah your stomach feels full pure dietary fiber yeah that's all that it is yeah they go you know they're regular pill size but once they're in size of you, they're just like poof. And they become like a mass of zero calorie stuff. And they help with digestion. Clean your diet up.

You know, it's pretty gross, though, because I did, just to see what they looked like, like soaking up water and shit. Like I took some of those capsules out once and put it in like a cup of water. Like expecting some like magic shit of like it's gonna soak it all up it'll just be foam and really it just becomes dirty looking water so yeah well you know let's go wings at 403 chiz says so that's good it absolutely is i'm wondering where he stands on so he's counting a lot a lot of loss. Oh, it's not good? I thought he started at 455 or some shit. Yeah, but he lost a lot of that weight before the surgery.

Post-surgery weight loss is, if we're being fair, a little low. He's eating more calories than they're telling him to. And his diet is literally blending soups up,

like vegetable soup with noodles and stuff in it. It looks like SpaghettiOs or something, like a little pasta and vegetables and a bunch of broth. He eats a large Wendy's chili, stuff like that. Wait, he's eating 800 calories, and the nutritionist said 400? Correct. So he's literally doubling what they said to do but both those are low numbers they are but it's like you just put in all this effort and pain and time into doing this like just obey what the nutritionist says

yeah and the other thing i don't believe it rightage yourself. I don't believe it. Right? So look, Wings is kind of known for not always sticking hard to the truth. Right? That's not his thing. And that's doubly true when it comes to caloric intake and weight loss and stuff like that. It's just something. I don't think he'd want to share his truth. He said that he was working out harder right now than he ever did during the boot camp.

Then the next tweet is, oh, I can't lift anything heavier than 15 pounds. Like, that just doesn't mesh to me. Yeah, I think we're in agreement on this. You know, it just... He's in a spot where everyone is looking at him, watching him, expecting him to do the thing that is hardest for him. So there's just a huge motivator in there to say that he's doing what he is. He says he is currently walking three miles per day. I think he's, is he heavier now? No, he's about the same weight.

If 403 is true, this is about where he was when he could barely do a mile. This is where he was when he left my house, I think. Right around this. I could be wrong about that. At 400-ish? Yeah, right at the bottom of 400. Maybe 405, somewhere in there. And I was like, I wanted him to get below 400 at my house.

That was my goal. So I was really sad that things tapered off and we didn't get into that. I'm sorry. I seem to remember him being at like 410 or 11 when he did walking 365 yeah so let's call 403 and 410 similar and uh he could only walk a mile so it's weird to me that like this post-surgery low calorie area he's doing three miles yeah it's get out of here come on just whatever you know what not a good liar one of the worst ever uh i think i saw him on his exercise bike recently that's good i think i saw him do something with that uh i think maybe chis and i watched a video

of him riding it last night or something or maybe an edit of of him riding it or something i don't know when he was old when he breaks, and I think he will, right? If he's eating 1,600 calories, if he's quadrupling the recommended amount, he'll break 400 soon. Yeah. He should take a picture of that scale. What is the, let's see,

what is the basal metabolic rate? I'm going to look this up. See what it is for someone who's 400 pounds. Yeah, I think it's about... How tall is he? Six foot. Eleven, six foot? I think it's about 3750.

I want to say I've done this before, and it's 3500, 3750, something like that. At 400 pounds, 32 years of age, six foot uh that is to maintain that that's 3260 calories a day assuming that you are totally sedentary so he could lose a pound every two days if he's at 1600 i think a pound is 3500 calories it is it,500. So every two and a half days, he'd be losing a pound of a mixture of fat, muscle, whatever.

If he did that. I mean, given his body composition, it'd be way more fat than muscle. Yeah. He's got no muscle on his body. I mean, he's got some leg muscle for sure.

Fat people have like, I mean, there's always that like myth that fat people use to, you know, boost themselves up where they're like yeah but if you put my legs on like a normal weight person's body i'd be able to jump on top of a building it's like well no not really you just put you would just put compressed bones and weakened a cardiovascular system onto a healthy person like that's what it would really be they'd experience a lot of numbness they didn't they weren't used to but yeah it is true that there is musculature under that for fat people

that georgian politician dude seemed like he had pretty good legs and he was a fat guy yeah but he was like he was short and like 275 right like stanza ish uh yeah maybe even probably he was he was better than costanza but he was still more stout more stocky yeah that's a normal human being i and and i don't wing he's still fat he's a he's a he's a fifth of a ton okay i mean i mean there are trucks not rated to hold him in the bed yeah i mean i'm like can a ridge line put wings of redemption in the bed. Yeah, I mean... I'm like, can a Honda Ridgeline put Wings of Redemption in the bed? No, not the Avalanche! No, the Avalanche can't! It's not meant for that!

Not with those low-profile tires! You gotta bend a rim! Maybe if it didn't have Coopers on it. I was actually interested in your guys' car talk with our guest a Honda Ridgeline can hold like 1500 pounds in the bed

it's like triple wings could your truck handle it Woody? the Tacoma that's probably a quarter ton right? I'll look it up the Tacoma I would think so. I know I put more in there. Yeah, it could.

It's about 1,500. It says 1,400 to 2,000. Oh, all right. Yeah, well, hopefully Wing sticks to it because there would be nothing more, I think, frustrating for his fans and people watching than to see him actually go through with the surgery and then not fulfill the diet aspect,

which we all knew the whole time, the diet aspect is the big thing. It is, but having, this isn't the one like boogie that forces him to only have a certain amount. Like for the first while with boogie, he only, he physically could only have a certain amount of food in his stomach at the

same time. You know, like I'm sure boogie stretched it out a bit since then but like initially that's what it was wings not the same situation i don't know the exact differentiation between the two procedures but i know that it's not the same extreme solution that boogie sought yeah okay i was just going to use boogie as an example like you know boogie struggled with his eating too right the evidence is there and he lost a ton of weight i thought wings was gonna have a similar result maybe he is it's not been that long three weeks in could you see boogie that's still on

so is what's boogie at right now like he started at like 550 or some shit right i don't know boogie's got emotional issues right now. He started somewhere ridiculous. The two things I mentioned, the gay people attacking him on Twitter. I almost dropped the F-bomb, but apparently you can't use that in conjunction with gay people. Leave that to Kyle. Thank you. And the girl who I guess his ex came out and said that she didn't like him anymore. Those two

things are crushing him. He made a video, Wings of Redemption esque, called I'm at Rock Bottom. And he just like revealed... Oh, that's kind of sad. Yeah, he's having a hard time right now with all the negative attention he's getting.

It's... I don't know. I feel for it. He's a new sugar baby attention he's getting. It's, I don't know, I feel for it. I just think he's a new sugar baby, that's all. No, he needs to, nothing is going to make him happy until he gets his own issue of being overweight and addicted to food under control. That's permanent fixes, Taylor.

We're looking for temporary ones, and I think a sugar baby might be just what he needs You're right I reject everything I just said As heartfelt advice To Woody's position Yeah fake it till you make it Just get some girl

That's Yeah I feel Like looking at drug addicts Or anything like heroin addicts, I see them, but I never have the propensity to overeat and to become fat in them. And it's like a living warning of what could be your future if you don't taper off eating Cheez-Its at, you know, 11 PM, a whole box, family size or something like it. I really like seeing fat people succeed. Like I'm, I'm pretty game for making fun of anyone for any reason one little thing that kind

of sticks in my craw is i don't like when people make fun of fat people when they're at the gym yeah if they're not if they're if they're not at the gym and they're just being exercising in general it's pretty it's it can still be funny and entertaining but if they're there working out and people are like look at this monster behind me taking a selfie. It's like you're a cunt. You're an unmitigated cunt. You're hateful. Fuck you. You're not doing this for any other reason than to maybe show off your ass and make fun of this poor obese person who's trying to work hard.

You think that obese person isn't going to every exercise machine going, everybody's looking at me. Everybody's looking at me. They all see me as a fat person. They all you know are making fun of me in their head like you want i really do think it takes quite a bit of gumption as an obese person to go to the gym you want to see a big fatty beat somebody up at mcdonald's yeah yeah i've seen this video and this woman is andrea the giant yeah so basically this uh basically this chick throws a milkshake at the very beginning of the video at the McDonald's manager. And the McDonald's manager...

She didn't like that. Hmm. They finally got the milkshake machine working. This unappreciative bitch threw the shake. There you go. I'm ready. Me too. Ready, set, play.

Oh, boy. Oh, nice. Topless. Whoa! Whoa! Big old ass. Wow. Now the next woman I've ever seen play dialogue. Big old ass. Wow, now the next woman's beating her up too. Oh yeah, now they're taking her a slap.

Oh my god, they're just handing her off, taking turns. This is glorious. Look at how this dumb whore dressed to go out in public. I'm into it. I like that about you, Kyle. Oh, yeah, pick up the chair. Give her some. What?

She wants another beating? Give me that. Give me the chair. I gotta say, this took the start of the fight. What are they still blurring out at the end of this beat? I don't know.

They're just keeping it there so they can... I don't know how exactly how that editing thing works, but this is very bad. And that dumb slut when she threw a milkshake And they're just keeping it there so they can... I don't know exactly how that editing thing works, but... And that dumb slut when she threw a milkshake didn't do it opening first until she got it all over herself. Mostly got it on herself. She didn't shit herself, did she?

No, she didn't shit herself. No, I don't see any... I wouldn't think so. That was an ass beating. This next clip is something we can all appreciate. It's a dump truck driver driving down the interstate with his dump bed all the way up.

Well, I mean, I don't know what that entirely means, but I'm going to watch. Yeah, I'm at zero. Oh, mine... Oh, I played it. Yeah, you have to play it and then pause it. I'm ready anytime. Yeah. 3, 2, 1, play.

Normal morning until I just glanced over to my left and I saw a dump truck with the back starting to go up. Just a normal drive so far. ...sites like this one are the new normal. This left ear thing is messing me up. There's a double take for sure. First the double take then the oh nice 595 that's kind of when I realized something it's probably gonna end up happening

Vertical smash up like you might have never seen where a dump truck with its gear in the dumping position I wonder if... It's impressive how that road sign didn't tumble down. Yeah, those things are stout. Now my other ear just kicked in. I wonder if the... The dump truck driver, after he hit it, was like, Ah, that explains the handling I felt for the last 13 minutes.

You would imagine that, A, there's probably sort of like visual indication that it's up, but you would think there'd be some sort of like wind resistance, some sort of handling change. It'd be tippy, you know, and corner different. Yeah. Yeah.

But I can also imagine that it's subtle enough that it could be missed. And it could have gotten stuck in that position. And he was just like, okay. I mean, I would, I would fucking hope not. The sign's 18 feet tall, but I don't see any cops. Oh, by the way, anyone in the PKA subreddit who wants to Photoshop more terrible, inappropriate guests

into the guest slot, I will continue to tweet them so do that no more terrorist chiz I tweeted you know I loved our most recent guest Osama was nothing but a pleasure so who would you like to see any ideas of like someone horrendous no no no

I don't want to give any ideas i like the creativity of the subreddit i like the shit they do not necessarily horrendous but i think we should have trump on the show i'd like to see i was there you go that's where i was going uh we're one step from trump or maybe maybe edit in like uh like a cam girl girl fucking herself or something and then tastefully blur out any nudity. Like, we're having... Our guest is literally a cam whore who's fucking herself. I like that idea.

Or she could be sucking a dick, but you've got her with the ice cream cone animation over it. You've all seen that, right? The safe-for-work porn. You don't have to blur it out guys just just make it i'll tweet it if i lose my account i'll make another one who cares oh but let's quickly make like a still frame of us all reacting to a girl who's who's like

doing something sexual let's make that face now let me help you not over the top realistic kyle i want you to look down taylor i want you taylor look to your left i need to practice that's the correct direction okay and i will look this way are we ready set okay all right there you go yeah i did it right there you go now how about here's one where we're all shocked all right everybody look look one where we're all shocked. All right? Everybody look. We just saw our guests kill themselves.

All right? And go. All right. Okay. Have fun, boys. Yeah, do that. Oh, I love all the creativity out of the subreddit. It's great. For sure.

All right. Well, we will be working on our conspiracy theories for next week. I think that'll be very fun. I'll be doing some research, contacting my sources on the inside, get to the bottom of this whole cloud. We've all got our sources, Kyle. That's right. All right.

Kyle, are there any outros? No, just check out Postmates and Dollar Shave Club. Oh, we have a hangout coming up shortly, so be on the lookout for that alert. Yeah, your email's been sent out to you. Make sure you show up for the hangout. Two hangouts, as always. If you're one of those people who can only make the early one, then you should be early to the early one, right?

Because the thing fills up, and then you're like, ah, well, I've got to go to work in two hours. I can't make the second show. There's nothing we can do for you. We can't kick somebody else out. Yeah, we can't just kick somebody out, and we certainly can't do a third show because we're already doing five hours of it

in a row which is two times more than we promised. We say we do an hour but we really do two hours or two and a half hours sometimes. So if you're one of those people who needs to be in the early show, the 12 to 2 p.m. show or whatever it is, get there early.

I usually pop in 5-10 minutes early. So make it happen. PKN 397.