Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #422

Episode Date: January 25, 2019

On this week's PKA, our friend Anthony Cumia has returned to prompted his new book and watch people get ran over by motorvehicles, the guys hold up their mugs in salute to the recent story that Chris Hansen has been arrested for bouncing bad checks and Taylor shares a Reddit story of a man having his wife being a shit eater sprung on him.

Already episode 422. Our guest, Anthony Acumia, will be coming. But for now, Kyle? Yeah, a few sponsors tonight. Smart Mouth, of course. Goat.com. Express VPN. TheZebra.com.

Capterra.com. And Manscapes.com. I'm very excited about a couple of these new sponsors tonight. That's a lot of quality companies right there. Oh, oh. I just want to do. Can we just do ads for the first 30 minutes of the show? Dude, I'm pretty excited about some of these ads.

Dude, that would be the funniest fucking bit to do on the show ever. Is like have Chiz save up like three dozen ads. And we just do nothing. Just do an ad show. Welcome to Bankular Ready where we sell you things and nothing more. Let's get right into it. I can set up my backdrop here to be like QVC. Get a little table, and that's all

that it is, just descriptions of products. I bet our viewers would love it. No name dropping yet, but next week, I think. Maybe next week. Coming soon. We've got a erectile dysfunction, or penis making work better sponsor spots are very excited about dick pills do dick pills and you won't know who we're talking about until they're weak and so

i kyle has not received his dick pills yet i have received my dick pills i haven't used them because i received them today uh but my plan my plan to give a true test of the dick pills veracity is to take one without my girlfriend knowing and then see if she comments or says anything different like there's that that has to be the true test right how else can you test a dick pill you you can feel and tell the difference i've never taken one so i'll have to take your word for it. I'm really curious. I don't know how to lay this out. There has been evidence here and there that I might have a better than average boner. Now, I'm not sure. I've only had my own boner thus far at 17 or 18 right like I think a lot of times guy hits 45 and there's some like difference in there um it popped into my head when Steve Hofstetter was on the show and I said something about like if you pull out and then like say blow a load on her welcome to the show guys and then uh come back in that like that's a way that people get pregnant and he's

like yeah how is that even possible and i'm like you know boner lasts for a little while afterwards right and he's like i don't think you're coming properly and i let it drop but that was it that was like the bit for a while like what he just probably comes 70 he doesn't know how to how to it's like i don't know i i agree with steve no dude it's very possible that you don't know how to have sex 50 50 you're not doing it right i was on woody's team for realism but kyle made me laugh harder so yeah yeah so i and like i guess some guys immediately after sex couldn't even go back in. I don't know.

But, like, there are these clues here and there. Like, Kyle has said, imagine your best day, right? That's what a boner pill gets you. And I need to try a boner pill, I guess, because I really feel like every time is my best day. Yeah, man, absolutely. I highly recommend them. Anyone who's like, oh, my dick's fine the way it is. What the fuck's wrong with you?

No, no. I always go back to the 87 octane versus 105 octane comparison. You're running a sports car. This is a high performance vehicle. High compression internals. Get the good fuel and put it in there. Give it your all. All right?

Do it. Do it. Try it. i've got to try this i i really i can hammer nails with this shit kyle i can't actually what if what if your penis ruptures what if your penis like you're already at 110 just naturally this pushes you to 125 and it just pops like an like an over uh overblown animal balloon. That's horrifying. It's a terrible thing to think. Like when you get the Stretch Armstrong and force all the goo into his foot and it just like... Exactly.

Yep. And then you leave it on your driveway for two days, it crisps out and you try and stretch it again and it explodes. That's the way Stretch Armstrong worked. Remember that? I never had one of those.

I never had one either, but Colin has a bunch of toys. Colin's had them. So, Kyle, when you don't use a dick pill, are you still getting to 100%? Yeah. Okay, so it really is pushing you from 100 to 110. That's honestly the way I feel,

is that this is a performance-enhancing drug. That's what we're going for. Like, Jon Jones would still be one of the baddest men on the planet, with or without his Tyraniball. But you give him a couple of, what are those called, Woody? Peckagrams? Peckograms. Peckograms. A couple of Peckograms of Tyraniball, and suddenly, he's the most dangerous man that ever lived.

All right? That's what I'm offering to you people. Okay? grams of terenobal and suddenly he's the most dangerous man that ever lived all right that's what i'm offering to you people okay you can go from a badass to the most dangerous man who ever lived in this short gap poor jackie yeah yeah cervix is gonna be like it is so i uh i you there are two options you know people can infer what kind of the two big dick pill formulas are out there but kyle you told me when we were choosing for for the delivery to go with one specifically and i did because you were saying one of them is like a magic you will get a boner right now, right now. And the other one, the one you recommended was, you kind of have a bit of a window. Yeah, the difference is sildenafil, which is what Viagra is,

and tadalafil, which is what Cialis is. And sildenafil, I've always had tons of side effects, like headaches, light sensitivity, blood pressure. That's pretty common. I looked that up when we were placing those orders, and a ton of people seem to believe that you're, to run, whatever the second one you said is much superior. Yeah, it's absolutely better. And they use the generic names, or the actual chemical names,

when you order, so you have to be, you know, look for that. But it's Tadalafil. That's Cialis. And I've talked about how expensive my prescription is. It's $300 for six pills. You break Cialis. I've talked about how expensive my prescription is. It's $300 for six pills. You break them in half and you've got 12 pills, but still, I don't break them in half. I take the whole pill.

I'm not following this doctor. I don't know if you meant to, but you were Bill Clinton when you did I don't break them in half. I take the whole pill. That's my Bill Clinton answer. Hillary tells me to just get a five-piece McNugget. Trick is, is I get two five pieces instead of a ten piece Eat one of the jog bags

She's like a dumb bitch doesn't know If you go into bed with Hillary You're going to eat at least two of those dick pills To even get flaccid Believe me I didn't use that cigar With Monica because I had to I did it because I wanted to With Hillary my god that pussy stank so bad

I gotta take a couple things. It's terrible. It smells like a Chinese fish market. Poor Hillary. The older I get, the more I sound like I'm always high. Do you notice that? Like Bill Clinton's voice, it kind of sounds like, you know what, man? Everybody settle down. I'm just trying to get to Hostie.

Oh, look at Mr. Cumia right now jumping in right away oh yeah how you doing guys can you hear me yes yes i can't better angle this time i can see some of your home instead of just the ceiling you know yeah i'm using the uh the real the real deal unit today not the laptop on the table so it's not going up it's kind of down from the monitor now it's a little better do you have uh do you still have that enormous gaming setup on your coffee table yeah that's that's what i'm sitting in front of right now it's uh yeah it's it's it's usually where i am i could be found here all the time it's a hilarious like juxtaposition when you see your home of like a beautiful home and then like what a 17 year old

with like a bunch of money would do or they're like into my gaming setup is going to be right here in front of the big ass tv and i'm going to have chicks to the side and beer and it's like you're just kind of living the life, that's exactly what it is. I'm constantly playing games now. There's some really good ones out there and really bad ones that I still will play. But I've gotten tied up now in this goddamn Call of Duty blackout. I'm not a Battle Royale guy.

I'm usually, you know, I love Battlefield 1. 5 is a bit of a disappointment. But I'm a run-and-gun kind of, you know, war thing. No fantasy stuff, really. And now I just don't know how to play this. I die within seconds. I don't know the weapons. i don't know the maps i just started like two days ago and my my girlfriend plays so i have to watch her doing very well and

i'm just cucked here uh yeah well she's more in that generation i've played uh i've played hundreds of hours of call of duty battle royale at this point um it's not what i'm playing right now we kind of switched games but we got pretty fucking good at it. I definitely had a good squad of players, and we would win four or five times a night, something like that. Wow. Yeah, see, I'm only doing solo because I'm too embarrassed. I'm too embarrassed to join a squad at this point. I'm terrible.

Like, horribly terrible. That's why you need the squad they they're there to pick you up yeah you suck dude you suck i don't know if i could i could take it at this point in my life dude being a little shit at video games uh that's been you for a while i remember an old ona clip like not even on serious like you guys were talking about everquest which you apparently got obsessed with and then didn't guys are talking about everquest which you apparently got obsessed with and then didn't you get banned from everquest at one point because some kid kept calling you like a faggot and you got really mad i no i i uh i never got banned from it um i did

play a lot though i was on there constantly when you look at the game and see it says how many actual days you have played and you just got to tell people that no it's not like days it's literally hours into days that you have sat and played this game and it it's months months if not years of your life you put a lot of time in and that's how EverQuest was no I, somebody let me into one of their guilds. And I guess I wasn't worthy, but they were a fan. So the people that didn't know who I was from a hole in the wall were like, well, what are you doing killing him to stay in? Dude, we don't know him.

So they kicked me out within like a week. I got kicked out of the guild. It was very embarrassing. Well, to even be in it was embarrassing, but then to be kicked out of it, I explained it on the air and it was all very, the listeners, of course, gave me crap about it. Yeah, I guess I must be mixing up the band

with like Twitter stuff. Because I swear I followed like three different Anthony Koumias at some point and then just one day you weren't around. Like, are you somewhere else there now or are you just not? No, Twitter,

I have an account, but I have not told anybody what the name is. I use it to research for the show and everything because it's, I just get, I get bombarded by

assholes and idiots and not haters as much as people that will literally do bad things to you your family, your life Oh my god, alright I'm sorry to interrupt you, I've been playing a game called Rust and let me tell you this

there is no more toxic group of players than in Rust we were in this one server and the servers have discords linked to them little communities of where people chat back and forth and we sort of peeked into their discord to see what these guys were all about like are they talking about their families or their home lives or what they do when they don't spend 50 hours a week playing rust no they're talking about this one guy in the game that they don't like and how they're going to find out what his IP

address is. They're going to clone his IP address and then they're going to download child pornography to his IP address and call the FBI. And I'm like, we don't want to play with these people. We don't want to play with them. You can have my base and all my weapons. Take all of my

sulfur and my gold and silver and whatever cloth you want. I don't know what is of value to you, but it is all yours. Goodbye, sir. I don't want to play with you. It's absurd. Yeah. Were they one of those Chinese servers that you came across?

Were they Americans? No, they were Americans. Yeah, they were Americans. Fucking psychopaths. Top-notch cyber criminals. I would maybe argue that they are the cream of the crop. Yeah, yeah. America number one. It's yet another thing.

America is great at just meaningless, profitless hate. Like Russia, there's a motive. China, it's for money or some kind of cyber espionage to get a company that could uh they could rip off or something but america is just absolutely based in hatred of someone for no

apparent reason i wonder who's more effective like the nsa or some asshole on xbox or rust yeah well when you when you hear about uh law enforcement agencies having to contact the company that made the device to unlock it so they could see what's on it and then there are people around the world just randomly unlocking people's stuff and looking into it then i think that pretty much answers who's really uh who's who's who's got the uh technology to spy on people normal law enforcement is worthless it's cyber problems i don't know if you've ever tried to work with the police on a cyber problem such a waste there's usually there's well there's nothing

we could really do about it right right we've deemed your like crime to be not worth my time can you just not use the internet? They're literally like Hank Hill. Why would you want to spend all day online when you could mow the yard? It's like, I get it, Hank. That is a solid point. We used to leave our phones on the wall

at home. Alright. We didn't even know what child porn was, Bobby. Frankly, I still don't. God, that's such a fucking underrated show. Yeah, that's hilarious, man. I feel like they could bring it back.

That's the great thing about animation. When people talk about a Friends reunion... Hank Hill hasn't aged out of the role. Yeah, they talk about the Friends reunion yeah they talk about the friends reunion I don't want to see Monica's old dried up ass in there again like she leaves Chandler and she becomes a whore again like no

I don't need to see that yeah don't touch your face they were all whores in that show oh I don't remember that you're probably right and I've heard that same criticism elsewhere like if you look at all their happy-go-lucky fuck sessions they're actually kind of loose women over there oh my god rachel's getting a different dick every week sometimes too tom selleck's swinging by just to slam it in monica and then he's going back to

hollywood it's absurd it's not getting pussy is it really that bad yeah every week every week they get a new dick every week week! It's absurd! Chandler is going up and down through drug addiction. So he just shows up fat as fuck one season, and then the next season he's totally withered-looking because he's on

amphetamines or whatever it is, and everybody has to pretend it's normal. Chandler, you silly bitch and your goddamn coke. You're right about coke. Maybe if people promoted it that way, more people would have watched outside of their regular demo. It's a bunch of whores

and this drug addict living in a building. The most realistic play out of that is Rachel would have gotten HIV from Marcel. Oh. The monkey. Teach the viewership a lesson. that is Rachel would have gotten HIV from Marcel. Oh. Teach the viewership a lesson.

Let fucking Rachel get AIDS right in the last season and Ross just checks out and he goes back to one of those girls who actually appreciated the fact that he's a fucking paleontologist in the modern era. I don't know any paleontologists. Do you? The guy works at the Museum of Natural History in New York.

He's bringing down some serious money. He's a PhD, right? Yeah! He's Dr. Geller. Meanwhile, he's the least desirable guy on that show somehow. And they have to put sweaters and shit on him because he's fucking yoked in real life. Dude is like

200 pounds of muscle at like 5'10 or something. Yeah, he was friends. But he had to look at a door Like a dork Exactly he doesn't look like it They put him in like sweater vests and shit And lots of clothes so you can't tell But he's got like traps and like big ass arms

And he's got a six pack There's a movie where he's like He's on the beach or something And you're like god damn Is that Ross or is that Jason Bourne? This is shocking me. He wasn't even yoked in Band of Brothers. Oh, well, that's early in his career.

He's definitely skinnier there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was pretty cool, though. Band of Brothers is after Friends. Oh. Yeah, that was pretty cool, though, him and Band of Brothers. I think he did a pretty good job. Oh, he was a great job.

Yeah, he was a real prick. He got out of me what they were trying to get out of me yeah yeah i i've always talked about the the worst part of that that just pulls you right out of it it's such a good series like like i've watched it numerous times and every time it's i'm just captivated by the story and the acting is great uh The cinematography was, you know, it might as well have just been saving Private Ryan. And then Jimmy Fallon shows up with supplies in the Battle of the Bulge. And it just, I'm like, I'm out. I'm out.

Hey, he's like in a Jeep. He's like, you guys need some ammo? Like it was a Saturday Night Live sketch. God damn it, I never noticed that, and now I will. It's terrible. Band of Brothers is amazing. And also, if you guys have a surround sound, it's one of the shows that really takes advantage of it.

There are bullets, like, zing! You think it's behind you. It is incredible. I still get scared by my surround sound every so often uh with a movie would it not so much a loud noise but a subtle sound where you kind of look at yes and you know if you have a cat or a dog like the cat looks up and kind of checks it out like something's in the house anthony will remember this do you remember when word processors first became a thing and everything you wrote was like a ransom note

30 different fonts in my book report you know like yeah the teacher would be impressed with this she might not know about times new roman or gothic and then over time a sense of style developed that's happened in surround sound but not i wish it was the ransom note model i wish that constantly there were like things going off behind me and in front of me and surprising me the dog should be freaked the fuck out all show long don't make it subtle yeah it is cool and and with the action movies uh those loud sequences are pretty goddamn amazing yeah and we used to like when i think about it because i do remember kids when you watched a picture tube television in front of you static like over the air analog signals and a speaker this big like it was it was a maybe six-inch at most diameter speaker, and it sucked.

Like, sound wasn't a thing. It's like you're lucky you have – you can hear what they're saying. That's all it was there for. Do you remember when you had a satellite outside your house that looked like you were searching for alien life outside the galaxy? And if you got a magnet too close to your television, it would ruin it, and your father would beat you like a rented mule? Those were the good old days. television, it would ruin it and your father would beat you like a rented mule. Those were the good old days. You would go into a drugstore and there was this futuristic machine where you could test your tubes for your television. And you would take all your tubes out and put them in this machine and test them.

And then you could look at the number and buy the tubes at the bottom from your friendly uh pharmacist would also sell you condoms wow this is so old it sounds made up to me it was all in black and white it was crazy our till my television as a kid didn't require any furniture because it was the furniture it had legs on it it sat on the ground and my parents didn't like our choice of programming so we turned the volume down low and go so close to it that our feet would be on the television we just lay on our backs watching it what you would feel that they hate cartoons you would feel the static electricity too like if you sat too close there was a crackling noise yeah you were definitely being irradiated you could put your hair on it and it would like

i also remember if you licked your finger and drug it across the front of the picture tube it would magnify the pixels yeah and then you'd look real like literally put your eye against the screen to look at the separate red and green and blue pixels as you just go blind. The dots per inch on 80 CRT were not iPhones. Like that shit was terrible. And your parents are smoking anyway while you're watching it. So you're getting mesothelioma. It's fantastic the good old days i like looking at all those old products from like the 20s and 30s when they still

were like you know nuclear power nuclear everything it's it's it's revolution healthy it's good for you like you there are here like it's like dormant toothpaste made with real radium. And it's like that was on the tube. I'm looking at a real product right now. That's a real product. Dormant toothpaste. It has radium sulfite in the tube to blast away the germs in your mouth. Think of the germs in your mouth as Japs.

And this is not what it is. That's a good line don't stand a chance against the strong mind of American nuclear they used to have the in wristwatch factories they would paint

with radium paint on the digits so it would glow in the dark and the women that would use the little paint it was by hand they would tap the brush on their tongue to make a point out of the brush with the paint. And they were just all dying of thyroid cancer and shit. Because it's like, well, it glows in the dark. It's like some kind of magic.

And then the factory owner is like, there's no reason all of our former employees don't have a jaw you ask someone else about that i'll tell you one thing it keeps the yapping down i've been into i've been into like old tanks and stuff and when you close all the hatches it's pitch black dark even in like a bright sunny day and like i'm looking at like all the gauges are glowing and i'm like this shit's from the 40s'm looking at like all the gauges are glowing and i'm like this shit's from the 40s why are the gauges glowing and they're coming over the microphone uh that's uh that's radium don't don't touch the cracked gauge okay uh just just don't touch that one it's been glowing for 80 years what is this shit they use on night sites yeah i bet both of

you know oh that's tritium and that's that's not dangerous yeah yeah yeah yeah that's not what they used in tanks back in the no they didn't have tritium this is radium tritium and barium and tritium spark like what stuff are we using now that they'll laugh at 30 years from now is ridiculously dangerous probably like chemotherapy internet uh also like when they when you get a brain injury and they need to release pressure so they drill a fucking hole in your head yeah like i remember watching there's a star trek movie and there's a part where like one of the start they go back in time and the star trek character bumps his head and they take him to the er and they're about to drill a goddamn hole in

his head and dr mccoy's like you savages yeah you're about to drill a goddamn hole in his head. And Dr. McCoy's like, you savages. You're going to drill a hole in this man's head here. My God, you don't drill holes in a man's head. Yeah, he was all pissed. If you make this leaky light over him, it'll be fine. Hey, get a pepper shaker that makes noise. Kyle, when are people doing that? They're not still drilling holes in people's heads now.

Yeah, that's how they relieve pressure in heads. And they have found, like, in Rome and Egypt, they have found skulls with the holes in their head because they were doing the same goddamn procedure a couple of thousand years ago. They haven't quite... You know, the instruments are cleaner, I would gather, but is also like the holes now i would assume are small to relieve pressure the holes back then on these skulls it's a size of a half dollar it's like it has very much pressure

in this head you must leave all of it have you ever seen the movie master and commander with uh with russell crowe there's a part where the guy gets a head injury, and the doctor's like, we're just going to drill a hole in his head and see what happens. I don't know. And they just peel the skin back, drill a fucking hole in his head, literally the size of a half dollar, because they close it with a half dollar. Yeah, yeah, that's right. They put a half dollar over it and then put the flesh back over,

and the guy wakes up like three-quarters of the way through the movie, and he's like, yar! Let's go, matey! Like, he's just better. He was weird to begin with, so nobody notices any real change in his demeanor. Back then, imagine how hard it would be to perform even a vaguely successful surgery,

because, like, anesthesia was just getting them wasted. Which is the worst possible thing for surgery. Like, you're bleeding more, like, your blood's flowing easier. Yeah. Not to mention they don't wash their hands. I mean, we've all seen the statistics about the mint bowl at the front of the restaurant. How much shit is actually in it.

Oh, yeah, yeah. These ancient peoples, even 100 years ago, 200 years ago, they were just covered in shit 24-7, I imagine. There was no fucking soap. I mean, there was soap, but not the kind of... They weren't showering daily on those pirate ships, you're telling me? No. No. Absolutely not. The boat got to get scrubbed down every day. The pirates, not so much. I feel like

rampant infection all the time. Yeah, and infections wound up killing more people during the Civil War than actual bullets. Wait, did the bullets cause the infections? Well, sometimes. Sometimes it was a sword. Yes.

A bayonet. I'm trying to remember the name of that nurse. I think it was the Civil War who, like, all those doctors were just running around, blood on their hands, like, dipping it in the same water and then going to town. Yes, maybe something like that. Clarabarton. She had, like, an uphill battle where she's like, hey guys, we should have running water and make sure it's clean before you wash it. And they're like, look at this uppity bitch telling us how to do things. You think you're eight of a little blood?

You think you're better than a one in eight success rate on the book? Be my guest. Germs, and they're invisible. Get out. Go make the men some coffee. Go to the women's tent and have Dr. Smith masturbate you against your will. You're hysterical. You're hysteria.

I watched a movie with that in it last night this horror movie and it was like just this guy like like in the nick kind of shit like in front of a whole operating theater like dragging this woman he's like now this woman seems normal doesn't she doesn't seem hysterical at all we have to try and trigger her how do we do that a hand touch here on the breast perhaps between the legs and he just just starts borderline raping this woman, and she's been so molested she goes catatonic. He's like, ah, hysteria. That's the hysteria

button. I looked it up. Clara Barton's right. There's a list of six people for women sanitary, and she's one of them. So, nicely done. Clara Barton. Yeah. Dorothy Dix is one of them. Dorothy Dix is, dude, so there's a park.

My favorite porn star. She won the AVN award for best angel. Let me lay this out. Amazing actor. Dorothy Dix Park in Raleigh is like our Central Park. It's kind of in Raleigh and it's this big area and stuff. And Pullen Park is near it, right? And they're redoing the whole thing with this amphitheater and this land bridge

that connects them. It should be this really cool thing. And all I want is for them to name it the Pullen Dicks Park when they combine the two. Or the Dicks Pullen Park. I'm fine with either one. But if they were to do that, that would just slump it.

We knew you were coming on, so we found some topics that we thought would be right up your alley. I found one of my favorite topics, and it's black people getting ran over by cars. Oh my god! How do I get that rap? It's a temple topic. This has been a recurring bit for a while.

Kyle loves it. He just can't get enough. This little video's called Bowling for Ratchets. Jesus Christ. Ratchets just means slut, right? Yeah. It means like a dirty hoe. Yeah, it's a particular kind of slut

without much class. Yeah. So like a chav. Sort of like that. What did Imus uh those female basketball players back in the day i know but i'm not saying i'm not happy headed yeah there you go woody thank you for saying that out loud uh i'm here i aim to please i can tell that'll teach you to report the news so if we'd all like to queue up at zero on this video and then we'll press play at the same time, we get to watch

a little bit of ratchet bowling. Let me see that. Okay. Are you guys ready? Oh, I am. Just waiting on Mr. Kumi. Oh, I'm ready. Ready. On play. Ready, set, play. So it looks like

they're having a spirit debate. Oh! Damn! Damn! Wow! Is that a taser right here? Yeah, she's got her taser out. She's got her stun gun out.

Oh, wow! Oh, I love it. All right, that's enough of that video. Wow. Yeah, that's just a few. Does he get to try to pick up the spare? Oh, Jesus. You missed one.

Oh, you missed one. Holy shit. And in this video... That's like attempted murder. By the way, to the viewership who watches every week, you might be like, how does Kyle find five more of these every week it's not hard it's not hard it's not that hard you could get so many more videos if you expanded the scope beyond

one race taylor taylor you might think that i'm searching black people getting ran over by cars i'm not i'm searching people getting ran over by cars and it's all black people i'm just searching ratchet hoes hit by cars and i'm this is what i'm getting it just keeps popping up it seems like a lot of no i love it this is such a funny fucking niche of video for you to get into yeah are you ready to watch the black lady gets run over by a car in daylight by attacking people. One moment, please. I'm just formatting. So she was attacking people. See, but most of these never seem like the

cars being used in defense. Ready, set, play. Alright, we have a lady. She's running through the parking lot. She's ready to hit with... What is that? A brick? A brick? A shoe, baby? No, it's something heavy and hard because she's about to hit with what is that a brand new a brick a shoe baby no it's something heavy and hard because she's about to knock his window look at

that oh no don't go back again oh That was the prestige. You can make it disappear, but you have to make it come back. Like the prestige. She regrets her little mistake there. Oh, you can see her legs totally. Her leg is going to get a privilege. Somebody call the ambulance. Wow, she's hurt. She has one privileged leg now.

Damn. Damn is right. I agree with the film dude. Oh my God. Taylor, earlier you were talking about that fetish where people fetishize people with sprained ankles. Oh yeah. Do you think there's some guy out there watching this going,

oh, she's prime now. Oh, she's totally fucking helpless. Yeah, that's what he's... See, if I'm going to throw a brick at a car, I'm not going to stand directly in front or behind it i'd want an elevated position right i'll serpentine i'll do whatever's needed to make sure i'm not holding the car behind them daring them to run over me with a brick in my almost every building is car proof right you just need a window or uh like a brick wall so that guy's like like to condemn that guy or girl a little bit like he could have just driven forward or she could have whoever's in

it right yeah i bet he's in trouble i i would imagine so yeah everyone here knows a little bit about guns sometimes there's like an obligation to retreat if you're not at home if you're out in public um it just seems like that should apply here no she got crushed in a stand your ground state it's it's all good that's a stand your ground this is my land and so is that concrete 30 yards that way i was afraid i was afraid i would be like yeah i was so flustered i hit reverse i was trying to hit drive you know that's yes plausible i am guilty of nothing but reckless driving your honor give me four points so flustered i went forward

again and then so flustered i went back again and let's not let's not forget what we see all the time also the guy uh that's recording it has a window that he's looking through that is uh of certain dimensions that would probably have perfectly matched a landscape mode of his video, yet he goes in portrait mode and pans and scans back and forth with it, breaking up the whole thing. So again, guns like this, phones like this. Now, I would argue, Anthony. I don't know would argue man i like the cloverfield action yeah yeah that was kind of dramatic we might be a little out of date on that like it's so

yeah now i know hold it landscape right but i think now you need to figure out what your audience is going to view it on or so if you're making like a Vine or an Instagram, that shit is watched on a phone. So you film in portrait. So you're saying if you're a tween. Yeah. No, the fucking viewer needs to turn their phone sideways too. I watch my shit in landscape. If I care about the video,

I'm turning this bitch like this and I'm sitting back and enjoying it. Leave a comment, people. I'm actually curious what people will say. Maybe I'll look at the comments. But I want to know, do you film it keeping in mind someone might be on their phone when they're watching this this is a phone platform or do you just go landscape all the time it's always whenever i feel film one of these ghetto car crushing videos i always go

landscape okay yeah yeah okay i can't wait to see one and hear your laugh behind the camera. As it's happening. Look at her leg! She ain't gonna walk right again! Dumb bitch. Is that Kyle? Portrait works good if you're

filming something that isn't really moving and it's somebody who's got a height thing going on. You don't want to go to landscape and have to move further back. So sometimes it does fit what you're filming. But for the most part, especially something like that where the guy's running from one side of the window. And I literally thought it was a television at first. I thought it was like recording a TV. It was his window. Why turn on the TV when action like that is out your window?

Yeah, no reason to. I have another video here. Now this one, no car involved. Don't worry. I have more car videos. How do you run over a ratchet without a car? Well, you use your fists. You use your fists, Woody. That's what you run her over with. This one was actually linked on our subreddit. It was linked to me a couple days ago. And I'm told, though you never know the backstory of this, for all we know, this gentleman was like a

white supremacist out there preaching the dark word. But I'm told... The dark word! Or probably the white word I guess but he was his family was being attacked and accosted his wife and daughters by this group

of young African American females and he was not one for that I think well this is a very short clip let's see what happens no car involved so I'm a little disappointed are you guys queued up at zero that is still going to be a car his hand my god anthony good because this one oh yeah all right ready set play yeah it looks like we're like outside a mall or a movie theater oh i know this one i had

gentlemen has like a four-year-old five-year-old and his wife behind him this group of females are well you know how they are they're they're hooting and hollering and having a good old time mocking him and pushing him and she shoves one and she wants some more so oh jesus oh shit at first i thought he shot her with a 44 magnum but it turns out he just punched her with a left. He hit her so hard, her head hit the ground before her feet left. She just, like a slinky. That's a Woody's Gamer tag right there. That's how you do it.

That was a way fucking harder punch than I thought was coming. I'm going to watch that again. Yeah, she came back at him. There's a moment. He took her out. There are a lot of people here. Before he shoves her the people here the first time so look i've watched this video a lot and i read all the comments on it apparently she hits him first now i don't know it's tricky when you when there's such a mismatch like what is your obligation to get beat up right like not that he's getting beat up that's not good phrasing

but like where does it start and where does it stop is she allowed to hit him does he have to wait for a scratch to the cheek like at what point does he say all right you know i'm allowed to win fights here you know like i don't have to just lose everything i don't know i don't know you also got to consider he's uh he's got his wife and young very young child behind him if his uh time is being taken up getting into some kind of protracted slap boxing fight with a 12 year old uh more crap could happen to to his family back there he dispatched her immediately yes and that was it uh you know you come up in someone's face like that and she put her hands up initially. You're going to get hit. People got to learn that at a young age. She

learned a valuable lesson at a very young age. I like how one of the top posts on our subreddit about this is critiquing the guy's form.'s like not another solid form punch he didn't even get his whole body behind it it worked in the comments they said that he was breaking up kind of a like i guess this group was picking on his wife or daughter or something like that and he came in there like a hero now those are reddit comments i can't think of much less reliable but if that's the case like i don't know i don't it's my nature to try to like find the the truth in the middle somewhere sometimes it's not in the middle sometimes a motherfucker just beats up a 12 year old girl there's no way to tell with this shit like because like the videos start in such

weird places and end always like you never get the full context. You don't know what's really going on. It's totally possible. That's all that matters. I saw that punch. I saw the climax. There is also a lot of evidence here. You know the whole thing about Taylor. How many 10-year-olds could you beat up?

It turns out if you beat the fuck out of one, the other nine quit. I don't know what number it would take for these other girls to have courage. But after this shot, all the other girls are like, ah, no, thank you.

Yeah. When they saw a holiday ham hit her face, they're not going near that guy. That guy looked enormous. He did. He didn't look like a norm. Like there's a regular, like full-sized American.

And then there's an extra large dude. That's what he was. He's an XXL dude. There's some chubby 220-pounders who wear XL. That's a double XL motherfucker right there. He's 6'3", 6'4", 240 at least. That's a big boy. You fuck with him, it's time for a little Darwinism to come into play, okay?

Like, that's the hyena going in by itself fucking with the big daddy lion. That's exactly the analogy I made. It's like, sometimes those hyenas, that lion turns around, snaps, and that neck is gone on the hyena. And the rest of them are all, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because that's what they do. They laugh. And they get their ass handed to them sometimes by the Lions. Oh my god. I love that video. That's harder. That looks harder than any punch I've ever seen in any UFC clip. And part of it is because it's someone taking a punch who, first of all, was walking briskly towards the assailant

so there's some force mismatch. He's a totally stoppable force meeting an immovable object. He's very stoppable and he's not moving. And why would you... That guy's going to be extra on edge if that's confirmed. That's his wife

and daughter behind him. He's going to be extra on edge if he feels like his wife and daughter are threatened. You don't want to... But then again, you don't really know what's going to be extra on edge if he feels like his wife and daughter are threatened. You don't want to – but then again, you don't really know what's going to happen. Under what scenario is it okay to hit little girls? Someone help me out here. That would look pretty good to me.

I mean if it's that funny. That's about as close as we're going to get to saying like, yeah, that's the situation I think. Is it okay? Like if you see your daughter getting bullied, can you just go in there and be like, well, now I'm the bully. I think you should have gone for more of a shove again than a punch, a full-out punch.

Like, create distance and, like, usher your family away. I imagine if you said that to him, he'd be like, I used my left. Right-handed, I could have taken it. I'm right-handed. It's like that Princess Bride part where the two guys are having their protracted sword fight. He's like, I have a secret to tell you.

Yes, what is it? I am left-handed. And then he gets the best of him for a while. He's like, I also have a secret. What? I too am not left-handed. And he just leans to his right. I feel like that's what was going on. How funny would it be if the interview for him afterward,

they're like, sir, sir, what happened? He's like, I feel like that's what was going on. How funny would it be if the interview with him afterward, they're like, sir, sir, what happened? He's like, I just arrived in America. I haven't even had the first Bellator fight, and this happened. They're like, oh, you shouldn't have said that. I am now 1-0. 1-0 in America.

Actually, I count all opponents. Jump to 14-0. Leave one punch, one KO, the rest, get the fuck off. That's the way it works around Silge. I want your opinion, Taylor.

Who got hit harder? That little girl or this gentleman that I just linked? Let's queue up at zero. Oh, boy. Oh, well, this guy's about to get hit

by a car, so I think he might edge out the human. Not a car. Are you guys ready? I'm ready. Ready, set, play. All right.

So there's a guy leaning in the driver's window, just talking. Man holding the camera, kind of dancing. I don't have much audio. He's acting the fool. All right. Camera dude walking behind another dude. I don't have much audio. He's acting the fool. Alright, camera dude walking behind another dude. Guy clowning. Video's only 45 seconds long, so

Yo, Big Mo, do your intersection dance. Everybody loves that. He's dancing in the middle of an intersection, literally. We love the intersection hustle. Do it. He's walking backwards into the street. Now forwards. He's doing the intersection hustle. Do it. He's walking backwards into the street. Now forwards. He's doing the intersection hustle.

Whoa! Whoa! Yeah. He got hit by an ice cream truck. The ice cream truck wins by KO Steve in perfect red. He went out the way he would have wanted. He got hit by an ice cream truck.

Jesus Christ. What the fuck is happening here? All right, well, you were right, Kyle. He got hit harder than the person in the previous video. Yeah. If you had to take your pick between getting hit by an ice cream truck or an angry father, angry father every time. Was he trying to get kind of

clipped by a truck? Oh, he was doing his intersection shuffle out there. I believe this is like the new Tide Pod challenge, right? Do the intersection shuffle. All the kids will be doing it soon. The busy intersection shuffle. That's hilarious.

Oh man, I hope that becomes a thing. Stop telling people about those challenges like like every time one prop crops up whenever somebody's snorting condoms or eating tide pods the news seven has to do a whole thing and we're letting you all know warn your children don't eat tide pod or snort condoms it's dangerous steve that's right i never knew tom i've no i read about it on cnn today today there was a story youtube is now banning dangerous challenges there was they listed two of them on cnn one was the tide pod challenge the other was the set yourself on fire challenge i guess that one you put like rubbing alcohol on yourself and set it on fire see how that goes

I love that one. You put rubbing alcohol on yourself and set it on fire. See how that goes? Yeah, not well. Yeah, there are a lot of those that just didn't go well. Yeah. There's one where the guy is being filmed in his own bathroom in his underwear by his mom. His mom is filming him do the set yourself on fire challenge.

He's standing in the shower shower dumping alcohol over himself he lights himself a flame and maybe somewhere between an eighth of a second around there he's the second breathless error he has committed because he like starts padding he panics and wants to start moving so he steps out of the shower water running towards him and then his mom's screaming get back in the water get back in the water and she has to get back in there and it's trying to rinse the alcohol very funny he got burned pretty severely yeah there is something uh about fire that takes all your thought process away all you're thinking is you want it off of you and you don't know how to do it so you try to run away from it like people try to run from the fire and it will stay on you uh actually it loves when you run fire but that that challenge again seemed to be more um there were a lot more of one ethnic group than

another uh with the fire challenge for some reason. I don't know why, but a lot of African-American kids were the ones setting themselves on fire. Yeah. White kids snort condoms and eat Tide Pods. Right. Black kids set themselves on fire. And they do that thing where you jump out of a moving car

and do a little dance. Do a little dance. Yeah. Dude, but eating a Tide Pod, lame as as fuck not even funny to watch setting yourself on fire very funny very ballsy and so i give the the points to setting yourself on fire you remember when these challenges were like like simple and not dangerous like the cinnamon challenge where you had to eat a whole spoonful of cinnamon right and and you'd cough and wheeze and blow cinnamon out. Everybody would laugh and giggle. That was both races.

That was a biracial challenge. We did that once on the ONA show. We did that, and I seriously thought the guy was going to die. Oh, you didn't do it yourself. I was like, huh, I didn't see that coming. No, I didn't do that myself. Oh. There are employees and interns to do our bidding uh yeah a big spoonful and his

his face turned red he could not breathe he tried drinking water and it just made a paste in his trachea and and the next day his eyeballs had ruptured blood vessels in him and everything so it's not it's not all that safe to do that one either i mean i remember when they were doing um charitable things like the ice bucket challenge and stuff but now it's just again everything that hits the internet gets perverted into either hate or violence or something else because it's it's the internet the funniest fucking thing that you guys on ona is a very old clip that i laugh my ass off to sometimes is when bobo so bobo's a retarded man in in the ona rack pack with a with a fucked up dick and at one point like sam or

someone had told him to go just walk around New York. And he called in. It was like, I do New York. I'm trying to get up here. What do you want me to do? And you and Opie are like, oh, it's illegal immigration day or some shit. And she's like, I want you to find a Hispanic person, walk up, and ask them for their papers. Ask them for their papers. And you guys are all cracking up and after like

three minutes of that where Bobo walks up and you can hear he's like, I'm being told by the people at the radio to ask for your papers. And you're like, no, don't tell them people on the radio are asking you. And then Jimmy jumps in and is like, Bobo go home. Go home. Do you want to know how

many people are going to stand up for us when it's in the news that we were all telling a retarded man to go up to Mexicans and ask for their papers? Bobo, go home. I want to have a job tomorrow. When Jimmy's the voice of reason, we've stepped way over the line. Oh, that was fucking hilarious. So many

classic bits on that show. I wish you and Jimmy could find some way to get working together again. Yeah, we do the Chip Chipperson show. He has his great character, Chip Chipperson. We've done live shows in Boston and Philly and New York, and they pack out, and it's so much fun. But he's got to just stay in character the entire time.

So it's got to kill him that he can't just be Jim Norton in front of these packed crowds even for a second which i'm not sure if that's the character or if jim norton is the character i i think that chip chipperson may be who he is i think uh well he he likes to say chip was opi i know i know i know i love that he does like to say that. I'm not void of any humor. It was Patrice, though, back in the day, who was saying, like, no, Chip, that's you.

That's true Jim. That's who you are. That high-voiced, you know, douchey Jim, that's Jim. This gruff-voiced guy is... This gruff-voiced guy, this is a play. This is a put-on. Rest in peace, Patrice. Yeah.

But yeah, do you think you'll ever do something with him where he's not being Chip? Because I enjoy his Chip bits interspersed, but I can't watch a whole thing of him being Chip. I would love to work with Jimmy in some capacity again, but SiriusXM still has some kind of an issue with me. Won't let me in the building. Shade 45 is the station right across from what we used to be uh in the hallway they're right across the hall and literally people who have killed people are allowed to go in there and uh promote their albums and i'm sure as soon as stern finally actually retires and counts his billions like they're gonna be wanting anyone and everyone who's someone yeah who's willing to walk

in that door and work for them because because he's all that's propping that company up at this point i feel like yeah but who knows with him he uh he'll stay on there forever i think you will too i think you i think he's got nothing else like he's gonna go fucking home in watercolor and fuck his hot wife with a condom on like a degenerate so pathetic so pathetic grown-ass 60 year old 65 year old man fucking your model wife with a condom on like why does he use a condom because they're so afraid of getting pregnant and i guess neither one of it and you know he won't get a vasectomy i suppose or maybe i like to imagine that that she's so disgusted by him that she doesn't want his dirty dick inside her without without a wrap Imagine having billions you still have to fuck your wife for the condom

Wrap it up Howie it looks like a egg inside a bird's nest anyway Probably looks a lot like he does yeah just not ideal it's got an afro in the head disgusting disgusting i i i i i have mixed feelings about howard but i despise robin i wish something bad would happen oh robin's the most annoying dumb cunt that ever got on the radio if it were for howard stern she'd be she'd she'd be nothing she'd be nothing she'd be working at a dairy queen somewhere fucking fucking fat dumb bitch you fat dumb bitch you fat dumb bitch you're so stupid your job is the news and like anytime like an actual like geopolitical question comes up or like even like a pop culture i don't know howard i'm just reading what's been put in front of me no no she's she's so terrible at her job without how if howard sir didn't like

her if she had if they hadn't bonded over that relationship with k rock and on the early days when they're getting bounced around she'd be nothing she'd be nothing she'll be a broadcaster she'll be on the radio she's nothing i do kind of credit her for not being an idiot over the last 30 years though right how many other people are right in howard's universe didn't realize they had a good thing going uh the um what's his name um jackie the joke man and he had a good thing going obviously already had his own issue going on that i think it was it was less that already didn't realize he had a good thing going on because he was making right at $990K a year, $980K a year.

Artie just had his demons. That was his problem. Who am I thinking of? Stuttering John? That guy should have rode the coattails for ages. He went to the Tonight Show, though. He got a better job. For a week?

He could have stayed Tonight Show, though. He got a better job. Like for a week. Well, yeah. He could have stayed there at Howard's. Yeah, he might still be working for Howard, stuttering in front of Jimmy Fallon or something. But Howard employs people for life if they just appreciate it. He doesn't pay very well. He doesn't go to bat for anybody. You don't think?

If you're a big player in it, he'll pay. Artie made a lot of money. Fred probably does pretty well because he's been the loyal soldier. Some of the peripheral guys, and even Gary. Gary doesn't make a lot of money. He was still doing gigs

just a few years ago. Gary will show up at your fucking car dealership. That should give you an idea of the millions he's making over there at the Stern show. Right. Like, like, and he's been replaced for that Marcy chick anyway.

Right. Like, like she's the real power behind. Yeah. Anthony, can you rotate your mic up a little? See if it sounds better. Okay.

Yeah. Oh, sorry. How's that? Oh my God. I should have said that half an hour ago is is that the problem that sounds good yeah sorry man it's all good i you know like i i listened to stern but i'm i'm sitting there like judging it the whole time yeah i'll listen to an hour and there's like five fucking minutes of good bits and it's it's not how we're doing them no no it's not how we're doing it it's it's it's one of the guys in the back it's it's fucking minutes of good bits. And it's not Howard doing them. No, no.

It's not Howard doing them. It's one of the guys in the back. It's fucking Sal Governale or Richard Christie or one of those guys who are doing like a prank phone call or something like that that I'm actually there to listen to, it seems. And Robin. And I like Fred. Fred's a genius. Fred's literally a genius. Yeah, Fred is the guy that's been there the whole time and consistently he's creative and a funny guy. And,

you know, he's one of the few guys that I actually, uh, spoke to a lot on a daily basis in the elevator and stuff going, uh, going up to serious and, uh, just a really kind of a regular nice guy.

Like you would, wouldn't look twice at him walking down the street unless you knew he was, uh, working for Howard, just a regular guy. He's highly intelligent. They used to do that bit called when Fred's money, where you'd call in and compete in trivia against Fred. And Fred won like 95% of those things.

And it's not easy trivia. It's not the kind of shit that you found here. It's difficult shit. I would listen to 10 questions, and I'd get four of them or something. Yeah, yeah. Gary Durabate's annual salary is $4 million. Woo! Really? I don't believe that at all. It's on the internet.

Are you telling me the internet's wrong? Come on. His teeth are made of wood. Figure that one out. That celebrity net worth site is just guesses. I don't know where that comes from. guesses. Yeah, I think it is guesses. Yeah, I don't know where that comes from.

Yeah, that he I don't think he makes even, he might make one million now but he was not making a lot of money over the course of the entire tenure there.

Certainly not to put up with the humiliation on air that he was. Right. Repeat after me. Repeat after me, Gary me Gary in the future when Bolf asks me to do something I do what Bolf tell me to do and he would repeat it

in the future when Bolf tell me to do something god damn it your children listen to this, Gary. That's hilarious. It is funny. But fuck Robin and her big, giant flabby, saggy titties

that probably hang down to her. There's a reason no man has been able to stand her over the last 50 years of her existence. Jim Florentine went out with her for a little while. You know, Jimmy, the comic? Yeah. I don't know how that happened or what happened during that,

but they were an item for a while. And I don't know, never quite found her very attractive. Well, she's well out of high school. Maybe that's it. She's got a... Robin gets paid very well. Yeah't know yeah yeah she's done very well but but she's got a couple of boats and a couple of houses and i i remember the bit where she's looking better than me the more i learn the better she sounds yeah you should see her

she looked good in 1995 she looked okay uh but but and she looked okay in 1995. Yeah, 95. She looked okay. But these days, I loved when she bought this big-ass yacht. God knows what it cost. Let's just call it a $3 million yacht. And she didn't know how to fucking swim. And she didn't know how to drive the boat. So she's just sitting there. That's incredibly racist of her to not swim. Busting those stereotypes. Fuck her. Fuck her. Yeah, busting those stereotypes. Fuck her. She annoys the fuck out of me.

I can't stand it. I'm paying $40 a month, Sirius. Come on. Is it $40 a month? Is that how much Sirius is? I thought if you bought it once, you could use it on a couple devices. That's not how it works? Not cars. I've got an app on my phone and i've got a interface

on my pc yeah but if i want all my cars to have it then i gotta pay for each car a little more if you call and you hassle them i could probably get more but they're but you know then you got to talk to an indian guy on the phone for half an hour and it's honestly not worth the extra ten dollars what they do that on purpose yeah so you don't even bother. You just get so frustrated. Okay, would you like me to activate your serial sex? No, no, just fucking do it. You know I've authorized you to do it. My name is Mike. Oh, really, Mike?

Sure it is. I'm William. Sure, Bill, how you doing? Want to do a double, Kyle? Yeah, I'll do a quick advertisement here. Tell everybody about Smart Mouth. Bad breath is gross. It's embarrassing.

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Goat. Smart mouth. two great friends oh my goodness did you hear the Chris Hansen bad check story oh we have evidence oh my god is that nuts

we are among the 55 mugs oh dude that's awesome ah jesus is that it Dude! That's awesome. Jesus. Is that it? There were just 55 mugs that he's bouncing checks for? I feel like this is like

Lord of the Rings when nine rings were stolen by Chris Hansen and distributed to media outlets. Have a seat. Always. We're moving to the elves with our own podcast, Racist and Offensive.

That is fantastic. Yeah, apparently the guy that he was buying the merchandise from, he gave him a check for $13,000 and the check bounced and he just kept putting them off and saying, all right, I'll pay you. I'll write you another check. I'll pay you cash. And he would never show up or he'd write another check and that one would bounce. So after numerous times, the guy went to the police and

said, hey, is Chris Hansen's passing a bad check, passing bad checks? And the police warned him, look, this is larceny. you have to pay this guy or we're gonna have to arrest you chris said okay i'll pay him gives him a check that check bounces so that's what like if if there's one check that you want to make sure it doesn't bounce it's the ones the cops told you to write or else you're getting arrested. That one bounced and they took him in. It's mug shots up there online. And he got arrested for passing bad checks. He told the guy, he goes, I'll pay you. I just had to sell a boat.

Like he had to sell a boat. What the hell has happened to Chris? I had to assume he made some money over the course of time. But I guess maybe divorce and maybe that lawsuit with that guy that blew his brains out for Catch a Predator. NBC settled that lawsuit, so I don't think that came out of Chris's pocket, but when he slept

with that NBC employee who was also married and his wife divorced him, I think that split all that Catching a Predator money right down the fucking center Jeff Bezos style. And then when he was when he came on our show he was promoting his uh his new show hansen versus predator ever on tv i think and uh i i don't know if true tv pays very well i don't know what the deal is but i mean i don't

think any of us here would struggle to come up with thirteen thousand dollars if the police were coming knocking right we didn't. If they tell you that you have to write a check that won't bounce. I wonder if they tackled him outside his residence in a ghillie suit. That's so fucking funny. I hope that he doesn't defend himself on the grounds of the check at all. Just all questions

responded to with like, not once have I fucked a kid. I've never, you're going to put me to with like not once have i fucked a kid i've never you're gonna put me in jail even though i haven't fucked a kid really that's what you're gonna do that's what he should do you know how many rapists i've put in jail you think i can't scam a mom and pop coffee mug shop out of 13 grand he came on the show what's the price of a pristine child's ass i ask you that he came on our our show, and I tried to gather a little sympathy for having some child porn on your computer, right? What if you just go to 4chan?

It downloads every image on the page. You don't know what could be there. It's random. Here's your cellmate, Chris. This is Pete from Cleveland. You might remember destroying his life. Why don't we leave you two alone to get reacquainted? My wife moved my children to Alaska.

If you're a fucking rapist... My parents changed their last name. Imagine the joy of having Chris Hansen ushered into your cell if he put you there and you're a rapist like you're you're thinking like i knew god was on my side like that's what that's what that guy's gonna be in the bible these girls are 12 13 all the time god was with me the whole time the love man will not stand before big mike catrelli and the funniest fucking defense if it's like, Your Honor, I'm a good Christian. Yeah. I was helping this girl. I was going to tell her

not to invite men over her house. Oh, I love that excuse. And you definitely don't want to let them do this. Yeah. And if he starts doing this and that part of his body called the penis starts to grow you definitely no come back come back i'm showing you this is educational i was talking about today

how like they they uh sometimes you get the transcripts of the guys going all right well don't say that because i don't know if chris hansen you know mbc because you catch a predator might be they have it in the transcripts that he's talking to this girl about. And he still doesn't recognize it when she's at the door going, come on in, I got to do the laundry, but you can wait here. Like, it's exactly like the show, but he's just so frothed up that he can't, he can't, the little bit of doubt in his head, like, maybe it is sex with a teen.

What do we think of this mugshot? It's never sex with a teen. I think he's lost a little weight. I think he's lost a little weight. He plumped up a little bit, frankly speaking, last time we saw him. Yeah, yeah. Did he? I didn't catch my attention.

Yeah, I'd say he put on about 40 good pounds. He looks back in pedophile catching shape. He did. He was on my show a couple of times too, and he looked like he was putting on a little weight. He's not bad in his picture. You know, like, look, he's not going to look like he did 30 years ago. That's just not one of the items on the menu.

You can't have that. So for a guy that's aging, you know, he's not having a good day, but he looks okay. So what are you going to do with this picture? I hope you don't use it for sex. I like the guy. Like he's been on my show, like I said, and he's a good guy. He's been on my show, like I said. He's a good guy. He's funny. He's got a lot of cool life experiences and stuff. Yeah, and then I saw this, and right when I heard Chris Hansen got arrested,

before I knew any details, I was just like, oh no, please don't make this really, really ironic. Same. I was like, oh God, please don't let it be a little girl please don't be let it be a little girl and he did this whole thing as a bit you know to like to like get him on the on the like to understand the system that catches child predators so that he could be the greatest of them all it would be the ultimate like like how they all end up being soccer coaches or some way to

get in there that would be nothing compared to what chris hansen would have done to get into that whole area uh unscathed if he was the bill cosby of child fuckery like like like how blown would your mind be especially like the man and i agree i'm with you i really loved his program back in the day when i would see it before youtube was a thing and i could just pull up the best of like it would be like oh to catch predators on tonight at nine i clear my schedule clear my schedule we're watching second nbc tonight let's get like yeah come over here no i'm not going to your house you come to my house watching chris hansen

he's gonna catch some pedophiles yeah did you see the last one He caught the guy and then caught him a second time at McDonald's after he let him go. It's so fun. And so, it's such a weird experience to watch a horrible person's life end before your eyes. Yeah, they're done. But if he ended up touching kids, if that actually happened,

obviously it didn't, but if it did, the only fair thing to do, because his judgment's clearly clouded, is to release all of those poor now newfound innocent men who he's locked up over the years you think so he was just taking out the competition he was taking out the competition that's what it was he was he was like price fixing but pedophiles he was like it's really hard to pick up a 12 year old girl with all these hot studs running around in their 30s but if i could clear the waters a little bit. He was asking, like, so you managed to get this 13-year-old here naked within half an hour of talking.

How did you do that? Dude, the people on the show, the Predators, the magic in the show is how defeated they were. Like, they knew what they were doing was wrong. He's just like, what are you doing? I have the transcripts. I know what you said. I know why you're here. And they briefly hold on to

this, like, you know, we said we were going to have cookies. I thought maybe that was it. And he's like, yeah, no, that's not true. And then he reads like an incriminating part. You said here that you wanted her cat to lick her beep while you beeped her

beep. And the guy's like, please don't read that. The guy's just like, oof. That's a line from a popular song. They would try the excuses, and then at one point when they would just go, please, please just let me go. This doesn't have to air.

Please don't do this to me. And you're like, yeah, that's it. That's the last one. He's begging Well now you're free to go. I Know this I Don't think I'm free to go. Yeah at the beginning the first the first season I think they were free to go because he was just working with Perverted justice and they hadn't had the police involved yet.

So he'd be like, all right, you're free to go. Your life is destroyed. But just have a great time. But then, yeah, they started getting the cops tackling them, which was great. This airs in April. Make sure your family tunes in, coach. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd love for the guy to be clever.

Like, you're free to go. He just starts running out the back kitchen door so you can get away. Yeah. I'll go back there, yeah. I'd love for the guy to be clever. Like, you're free to go. He just starts running out the back kitchen door so you can get away. Oh, they're back there, too. They're back there, too. No. Imagine that if they're like, back door. How many guys in ghillie suits do they have surrounding the place? I'm done.

Okay. The back door. Could I just use the bathroom? You should have known the back door was his first choice based on the transcript. Your Honor, it was my intention to use the back door this whole first choice based on the transcript. Your Honor, it was my intention to use the back door this whole time. But we know who you are. I'm going to call you when this airs.

What would you do if you get caught in Chris Hansen to catch Predator Season 1 and he's like, this is going to air in May. So, act accordingly. How do you act accordingly? You have a wife, two kids, you have a job uh let's just say you're you're you gotta just go full chris benoit oh wow did you kill everyone it's even

not me i i in my head it was like honey we should move to haiti no reason in particular let's just go because you want to die before me. You got to start building a backstory. You know, your dog is so far in Senegal. Yeah, you got to start building some kind of backstory. Like, you come home from work one day and just go, I saw a guy today. I swear I thought I was looking in a mirror. I swear. No, he works near me. And then every day, you're like, that guy that looks just like me, weird dude.

He was, like, holding hands with a girl. I guess it might have been his daughter But they were a little too friendly and then you just play it like that and then when it airs like oh my god That's him honey. That's the good doesn't he look just like me he shops where I shop Yeah This piece you know what? People are going to think that's me. I'm outraged.

The strangest thing is he's also attracted to children. How odd. Holy shit, I blew it. Damn it. We're moving to Alaska and not the normal part of Alaska that white people go with their disgrace. We've got to go to the park without cable.

We've got to go to the park without cable. We're going to build our own log cabin. Did you see this article I just linked? I do not. XNFL breaks man's face. This guy is a bad decision maker. The white guy with the black eye was masturbating outside the window of the black guy's daughter. Oh my God.

Yeah. Broke his face a little more than that. Tennessee Titans fourth round pick, Tony Beckham, NFL defensive back. He's retired. I guess he caught the guy with his hands down his pants in the bushes next to his daughter's window masturbating. They say he made it about 50 feet before this NFL

running back caught him. A defensive back. Oh, that is bad luck. Proceeded to smash the guy up bad, breaking his face in a couple different places. They should have like a pedophile combine. They see how fast

these guys can go. Just running the 40. Coming up to the one child rape and then he has to sprint. My God. Steve Stevenson really making a way with... That would be fucking funny. I don't think they'd air that. But really, this is great. I'm totally in favor of this guy. He should have beat the shit out of him more.

Giving him an extra couple punches because you didn't read it, Woody. He was masturbating outside the window Monday morning. Why was that so essential? Because it's like, it's not even nighttime. Where I would imagine like peeping Toms do most of their peeping. Doing it in the morning? Yeah. That's risky business.

I like that Taylor finds the true crime to be morning masturbation. Woody, you left out the key part. She was 15. I mean, do we have any pictures of the daughter? Yeah, that's important here. He could face 15 years in prison if he's convicted. I think that's pretty appropriate. I don't know.

That seems excessive. Dude, but this is the kind of do you think this person is like their one thing is they're just going to masturbate at underage girls like that's not how the law works you can't be like not only does he masturbate did we catch him masturbating at a window i don't think he's a very nice fella i'm not legal expert my friend cliff is i don't know i'm just speaking from the heart well i'd like to speak to cliff on this matter frankly because because i just he was 50 feet from the window right that i I don't know. I'm just speaking from the heart. Well, I'd like to speak to Cliff on this matter, frankly, because he was 50 feet from the window, right? I don't know what the

safe zone is for masturbating to a child, but I would assume that it's somewhere between 50 and 75 feet. You're all safe. He was right outside the window. 50 feet is how far he made it from the house before the defensive back caught him. What kind of fucking Hawkeye

masturbator is this? He's 50 feet away. Just... Oh, damn it! That's been the dad's room the whole time. Oh, God. Oh, God. Good for him.

What is an appropriate amount of jail time For just masturbating outside a window Only masturbating outside a window It depends on who you're masturbating to I think the first offense is probation Frankly that's just my opinion Watch the police cars I really do I think first offense is some sort of

Probation or something Because if you haven't done anything and all you did was jerk off in some bushes, I don't care what you were looking at, whether it was a toddler or an old lady. No one's been injured, especially if it's nighttime. Right? Because the window doesn't work both ways at nighttime. You get the reflection.

We've established the crux of this story. It happened Monday morning. It may have been 5 a.m and still dark oh you know but but who knows i choose to believe the school bus is going behind him and he's like turning around to get a couple few jerks in there while this guy sprints at him you know the one situation i could say we're no jail time is if you just let this tony beckham guy have another three minutes of eating time. Yeah. Oh,

there are minutes of beating time. This could totally let him savage him. And then it's like, Oh, do you learn your lesson? Mr. My jaw doesn't work. Yeah,

I think you did. This sounds like a segment from a Seinfeld episode where Kramer just had jock itch or something. Oh yeah. Caused by like some pants that, that like George had laundered for them improperly or something. And, and now there's an NFL

player chasing him down, beating him. I don't know how I feel about this. I don't know really what the jail time should be. I feel like the victim should have some say. If she's traumatized and not the same person again, then that's awful. If it's me, I'm a little flattered.

If she was in there like, oh, that's for me? Not again. I didn't even think about her being the one that raised the alarm. I was imagining him walking out and seeing this happen. I think the whole story is bullshit.

Some woman was flipping the bean outside my window. I don't need her to do 15 years in jail. The whole story is bullshit because no way Tony Beckham was up early on a Monday morning. Jesus Christ. I thought that as well. I'm not sure his daughter was either. Are we sure he was masturbating to her?

Are we 100% sure? When did this happen? Noon 30? Oh. Yeah. her are we 100% sure what did this happen noon 30 CPT poor guy I thought he had like a nice NFL career only six starts in one career interception but he played for five or six years that's true good

for him and I haven't played a single NFL game he got a the other day it seems That's pretty impressive He stopped this guy's tracks Should add that to his stats Add one more tackle One interception, five starts, one rapist

He got a penalty for roughing the pedo Why do you have a KO on your NFL stats? Roughing the asser He's a giant ass Yeah, it's not good if you have to explain it Not all pets KO on your NFL staff. Roughing the asser. He's a giant ass. Yeah, it's not good if you have to explain it. Not all bad. I was looking at weird shit on Reddit today trying to find something.

There's a Reddit called Sprained Ankles. Most of it is people who sprain their ankles and they're like is this swollen too much uh should i go to the doctor this doesn't look good does it but then i guess there's some people here who get off on seeing people break or sprain ankles because it turns them on there's like this one is a, what looks to be like a young girl just doing like innocent dancing, like gymnastic shit, and she breaks her ankle.

And the guy posted it saying, girl breaks ankle in gymnastics. The snap is just so arousing. Oh my God. And the guy says, one of the commenters goes, nice, I'm more into the pain after the fact and watching them get treatment.

So this one ended too soon for me but good find and this is so beyond fucking weird that this is weirder to me than people who like to drink cum in public or something because at least that has a sexual

fluid with it this is just enjoying watching sometimes children break their fucking ankles wow so i don't know if this one has legs she certainly doesn't but i i hear you i i'm a little torn actually on one hand i find it to be sort of weird on the other hand like pka is the last place to kink shame anybody i don't know i just imagine this guy's out like digging tiny little gopher holes in the women's soccer field and stuff and just yeah yeah come on come on oh yeah yeah yeah she's down releasing moles late at night into parks

they call him the mole man what he does is he sneaks into parks, leaving moles behind. Don't let your children run around on their own, or they may end up in one of his videos. What are you doing here digging holes in the park? Yeah. You know, I guess I can't get enough

of kids breaking their ankles. Breaking their ankle? This is a twisted, sadistic kind of thing here, I guess. And there's nothing arousing about that snap. Did it make a sound? I watched that. Oh, yeah. I turned it down quite a bit because I hate that bone snapping sound.

And it's a bad break. Are we going to watch it together? Yeah, we can. Are we going to watch it together? Yeah, we can. I don't know why this one's harder to watch than the ice cream box one. Dude, bone breaking stuff is hard. Bone breaking is pretty bad. Alright, I'm going to not watch it on full volume,

but I'm ready. Oh boy, here we go. Alright, I'm going to add a little volume, I guess. You guys ready? Set, play. Hi guys, this is my friend Maddie. She's about to do her first round off ever. No, she's not. I'm already scared.

Oh my God. What happened? No, seriously. Oh my God, holy. That's horrible. And some degenerate commented on that that it ended too soon because he's more into the pain after

the fact he's like well this is all yeah he wanted to see I like to watch the suffering more extended it's like Jesus fucking Christ what's wrong with you yeah he wanted to see some pain when I broke my ankle I feel bad about making the kick shame joke

because that's awful. Yeah, that is a terrible kink to have. What's the worst kink to have? This one. This one. I know that there are people who are into their partner being essentially disabled or enabled.

Oh, right. Disabled. To the point where even if there's nothing wrong with their girlfriend, they want to wrap both their legs up in casts. And you know people like this or you've heard of it? I've – what? You said you know people as if they exist in your world. But no, like you know them.

You don't know them. You just heard about them on the internet. I've known people who knew people who were into this. Okay, okay. And wanted them to do these things. One degree or two degrees of separation. Yeah, yeah. This guy wanted to wrap me up in plaster of Paris and gauze

and make me walk around like Tiny Tim around the house staggering around and have him put a sippy cup in my mouth and maybe put me in a full body cast eventually. And I was like, and then what? Fuck your mouth or something? No, no, just take care of me. I think the worst kinks are the ones

that can't be satisfied. At least that one, he may find Mrs. Right, some broken woman. Some really damaged woman who had a car accident. But if you're really, really into fucking... What is the horse with the man's upper body called?

Centaur. If you're into centaurs, then you're fucked. You just die and never get one. Furries solve that problem. They figured out that you can just dress up as mascots and fuck one another one half at a time there you go one half the centaur you get the guy and then you get the horse uh somewhere in oregon and uh have it remove your innards and no i pictured there picture the guys in the horse costume and the guy in front is like well, this is boring I just sit here while you get fucked in the ass

Going back there shut up. You're supposed to be winning Why is he doing that? He's just bilingual in Kyle's dream. He speaks perfect English and whatever the fuck that is. If you have to be a furry, which animal do you pick? I think those foxes are kind of hot. I think the fox.

I was going to say fox. Fox is the hottest animal to me. We even say, oh, she think those foxes are kind of hot, you know, and I think the fox is the hottest animal to me. I mean, we even say like, oh, she's a fox. Aren't they goofy versions of the animal, though? Sometimes. It's not like, oh, that looks like a real fox kind of walking around. What if it did? It's like, has googly eyes.

Like the Carfax fox or something. There's a human penis hanging out the front. What if it looked like an enormous taxidermied fox? Yeah. It'd be the most disturbing. Ah! Oh, God! Not sexy.

That's not sexy. I wonder if I'd be a female furry. Like, in a video game, I always seem to choose female characters. Right? Yeah, yeah. I don't know if I'm alone in this. I do too, especially in third-person games because you're looking at her ass from behind the whole time. They're usually hot, right?

If there's a guy in a video game, half the time they're fat pieces of shit. I don't want to be Coach in Left 4 Dead if you know him. That guy needs to lose 60 pounds. Zoe, on the other hand, is smoking hot. That's the one I want to be. True. on the other hand is smoking hot that's the one i want to be true i always also assume that women's hit boxes are smaller even when people like show me conclusive evidence of like if they're the hit boxes aren't smaller you're just playing for no reason i'm like nah that can't be right yeah i

always play as a girl and pub g i play as a girl and call of duty i play as a girl wow and fallout i uh and fallout i go through the all the trouble of modding my character until she looks like a celebrity that i'm into but a celebrity who got a lot of plastic mods i download custom pussy lip mods so that i can decide exactly what her pussy looks like the pubic hair the tits the areolas the the nipples how long i'm i'm like moving a slider and the nipples going i'm like four inches long that's exactly what i want yes it looks like one of those balloon animal balloons before you yeah excellent are we talking about areolas or clits in this we're talking about nipples at this point oh a four inch long nipple all yeah yeah it's it's

it's hanging down at this point it's so long, I don't think that's my cup of tea, no. Oh, it's mine. That's exactly what it is. My character looks like Maggie from Walking Dead, except you inflated her tits with 50 gallons of foam. It's just shocking when she walks. And I downloaded another mod to add physics to the titties. So when she's shooting a gun, it's like boom, boom, boom.

Oh, right. Jiggle, jiggle, boom all right jiggle jiggle jiggle jiggle yeah it's a thing of beauty all right i can't i can't play more than half an hour without without ejaculating though walking dead sparked this topic in my game of thrones has a date now is it march 16th does that sound right march something march or april yeah so yeah i'd have to look it up i don't know i'm I'm mad at Game of Thrones. I was a young man when that show first came out. Crazy. It's been 12 years.

Does that sound right? All these shows. It has not been five years. Game of Thrones, you're math-tarded. That show first came out ages ago. It took them too long. When's the last time an episode has been on? A year and a half?

It could come out in 2012 or 2011. It could be. What were you saying about it, Anthony? HBO is just able to do that. They were the first network or whatever you want to call them that actually said, yeah, we'll be back with this in

a year and a half, two years, thanks. Like The Sopranos and stuff. You'd be like, yeah, we'll be back with this in a year and a half, two years, thanks. Like the Sopranos and stuff. You'd be like, oh, we've got to wait 18 months for the next season? Yeah, what are you going to do? I guess we'll watch it when it comes on. And that's what you'll do.

You can be mad, but we'll all be watching it. Guilty. 2011. I love that every season of Sopranos begins with Tony much fatter. Oh, yeah. Lumbering down the driveway. Less hair, bigger belly. He's got hair in other places that he gets.

His shoulders are hairy now. And he's always more and more depressed as he lumbers down that driveway. It's a very difficult situation. That's not bad. I love that show. It's so rewatchable. The gunplay didn't bother you. What's that?

The gunplay didn't bother you. The whole shooting and poking. I was so disturbed by that. No, it's what it is. I can't get over it. It's a major thing for me for some reason. I'm really irritated. That doesn't bother me because I figure they're gangsters, right?

Have you ever seen them practice once? Yeah, yeah. Hey, Kate, I gotta go down at a range. You never see that. They're not marksmen. They're supposed to be killers.

Yeah, they shoot people from three feet away. Not in the show. Yeah, most of the time. Like when Jimmy got popped. That Russian dude in the snowy woods? They missed him. That's what I'm saying. They should have practiced.

Yeah, throw the bullet a little faster. Paulie literally said that in that episode. He's like, I'm saying. They should have practiced. Bang, bang, China. Yeah, yeah. Throw the bullet a little faster. Paulie literally said that in that episode. He's like, I'm a marksman. I'm a marksman. The Pine Barrens episode might be my favorite episode. He killed 10 Czechoslovakians. He was an interior decorator. He was the interior minister that killed 10 Chechnyans.

He killed 10 Czechoslovakians. He was an interior decorator. Hilarious. That was a good one. I've always said that my dream for the way The Sopranos should have ended would be that Tony has to flee the country. And he goes over to Russia. Because that's where his money is hidden anyway. And somehow that all comes full circle where the guy that Paulie shot in the woods comes back into play, and there's a whole

Russian storyline with them trying to... He's got a big dent in his head. A point? You probably know. Do you know they're doing a prequel? Yeah, I know. You're not excited about it, though. They could really ruin the... It could be terrible.

Is David Chase working on it? Yeah. That's good. Just make it like The Matrix where the other two didn't really happen. They just cast that guy, what's his name, from The Walking Dead the earlier seasons or halfway through, Rick's partner. Oh, Bernthal. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The Predator dude, right? He's in it. The Predator's the cartoon. The Punisher. Thank you, The Punisher. Yeah, yeah. I'm looking forward to predator dude right he's in it the predator's the cartoon punisher thank you the punisher yeah yeah yeah yeah i'm looking forward to season two of that i hope they i hope they never tone that shit down and i was surprised i look this is a fucking superhero who had with no powers his power is murder okay his power is impatience that's my favorite part about it's hilarious he's like uh john wick right? There's no conversations. If he thinks you should be dead, then he just does that.

Yeah, there's no reasoning. There's no monologuing. Yeah. And he'll shoot you from across the street. He's not interested in a conversation. He'll be like, oh, there they are. They're dead. All right.

Punished. Punished. He's punishing people it's right there I kind of enjoyed the first season I felt like they had six episodes does he have any lame like one liners where he's like blows someone away

he's like that's a demerit like any really dumb go to your room you've been punished oh I'm getting little douche chills just saying it like that because hollywood would do something stupid like that in the dc world they would yeah yeah yeah i don't know i hope they do a good job of it i i i really do because i love the sopranos it was it was really it really It really sucked when James Gandolfini died

and sort of removed any chance of him ever being in that role again. The fat fuck should have gone on a diet, god damn it. Eat a salad and not some men of golf or whatever the fuck. No, that's just like you were making fun of him for getting fatter and hairier. That's just the natural aging of an Italian man. Yeah, the progression. You've seen that documentary on Netflix, where it's like,

at the age of 47, something remarkable happens to the Italian man. Hair begins sprouting everywhere, and weight begins to accumulate around the gut. The hands increase in size, and anger escalates greatly. Soon, he will begin the aquatic phase of his life. Physical fitness makes a market turn down, but confidence has never been higher. Jesus. I kind of didn't like it

when Tony Soprano got incredibly obese as well in the show. I wish he stayed. It was kind of nice early on when it was like, ah, Tony is a big motherfucker. He is a tough guy. I wouldn't want to of nice early on when it was like, oh, Tony is a big motherfucker. Like he is a tough guy. Like I want to roll with Tony. But by the end, it was like, I feel like if you hit Tony, he would be hurt. You watch that pilot episode and he's, you know, he's not fat.

No, it's a big guy. He's not doing the whole Tony accent, really. It's he's still whole Tony accent, really. He's still very Gandolfini-sounding. I guess they got him a dialogue coach that gave him that more skinny thing. There was a space there between the pilot and

then the series kicking off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they prepped him for it. It's weird because he went back to that voice when he had to be the... Coma. Yeah, yeah, when he was in the coma. And he was that guy, that just business guy. James Peterson or some shit. The solar panel salesman.

Yeah, yeah. It was weird because his name kind of meant something. It almost sounded like Lexus or something. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's a great show. The fat thing, to me, is like a mob stereotype. It seems like a lot of mob movies

have one guy who we're supposed to believe is tough who doesn't look like he could sit on the potty by himself. The fat jokes were great in the show. The shit they used to say when Bobby Bacala and Vito was standing next to each other.

Yeah, you two look like before and way before. And then Raghu. Raghu. Whenever any movie, it could be Goodfellas or

Sopranos or something, whenever someone goes, wow, wow, just busting balls over here, someone's going to die. Like, no one seems to be able to take just busting balls. Someone's going to die. Remember when Steve Buscemi

is on as cousin Tony, and Tony and Christopher go up to the country or whatever with the uncle or whatever, and they break Chrissy's balls so much that he's like, I'm going to go head back. I got some shit to do. And he's driving home in his Range Rover, and there's tears.

Yeah. He's crying. He's crying. He's just breaking balls. Why? Yeah, that's... Oh, they were ruthless with that stuff. It was so fun with the way Bacala,

the way they fuck with Bobby about his weight. So goddamn funny. It was a really, really well-written show. Yeah, yeah. He takes the cake. And then Gandolfini led an incredible cast. Amazing show. I've watched it so many times.

So many times. I could still just pop one episode on it. It's not one where you need to go through the whole series. Everything's so good. The acting, the writing, and the jokes. Some people watch... I've had the guy that played Johnny

Sack. I've had him on my show a lot of times. Really good guy. Vincent Curatola. And we talk on my show a lot of times a really good guy vincent curatola yep and uh we we talk about the show a lot and uh he was like some people got on there they didn't know if it was a sitcom at one point we're just the scripts were so funny but then when we actually went through it it was tragic and like people are getting killed but it's hysterically funny yeah uh and it's true like every episode has parts in it that are just you laugh your ass off but it's ruthless sociopathic murderers speaking of your mother you hear titty sex titty sack got a 50 pound mole removed from her ass. Now people have to die.

Hey T, you hear what I said? Repeating jokes. Pauly might be my favorite character in the show. Pauly's such a scummy, weird guy. There's that episode where Tony and Pauly are out on the boat

by themselves. Oh yeah. Tony suspects heavily that Pauly was the one who letly are out on the boat by themselves when they go down. Oh, yeah. And Tony knows, he suspects heavily that Pauly was the one who let the cat out of the bag about the Jenny Sack joke. And he's looking around. He's accusing him. He's like, you did it, right?

You know, kind of like. Come on, you told the joke. It's okay. But then he's like, grab us another beer. And Pauly goes to grab the beer. And Tony's looking at all the weapons around him. There's like a machete stuck in the edge of of the boat there's like a hammer there's like like all this he's just like he's totally thinking about killing paul oh yeah yeah right there he was

making a decision and if i think of paulie cracked even a little bit and said well i might have in passing he'd have killed him he'd have killed him right there killed him right there but and it would have been deserved. Paulie cost Tony so much money. Oh, he wouldn't shut up in jail. Oh, it was so funny how Johnny Sack played him. Oh, Carmine loves you. He asked about you. How you doing?

And then Paulie sees him at a party and he's like, Carmine, how are you? I said, who are you? He goes, ha! He had been telling him, yeah, he loves you? I said, who are you? He goes, he had been telling him, yeah, he loves you. He sends his love. It's a dear friend of ours. Yeah, it's fucking great.

It's one of the, I think, one of the top yeah, I'd probably put it in my number one show. I think it was It's real high up there for me. It was done so well i like the wire a lot and i really like game of thrones and those three to me are probably it i got the same three and they're all hbo and again hbo they just can't lose i love how uh showtime tries these knockoff

versions of what worked on on hbo it's so bad i don't know why other people can't do as well netflix has like game of thrones oh we have the borgias oh really do you how's that working out i think netflix sucks to your point woody at it because like i feel like hbo is drilling down a lot more and like like going for quality over quantity whereas netflix it's, it's like a known joke now. Scroll through the stand-up specials on Netflix and tell me how many of those people you know. It's almost zero. They're giving contracts to everyone.

They're just trying to flood. I think they're just kind of trying to be an independent competitor to TV all on their own in both quality and the amount of shit you have to select from. I think they're a technology company trying to exist in the media world. And they're just learning a new thing. That's definitely true. They kind of stormed that beach. They were the first ones

of the new streaming companies to really have their own catalog. They were throwing out DVDs for so long. Netflix was a DVD mailing company before digital delivery It was like watch all the movies you want but just keep in mind

it takes us like 4 days to ship you a DVD and 4 days for you to ship it back All you want is about 3 a month I can't wait to watch Lord of the Rings on Thursday I want to watch Lord of the Rings on Thursday. I want to watch it now. Right.

That was it. People's demand for now, man. I want to watch it now. That's what the bottom line was. I was an idiot. For the longest time, they were like, Netflix's DVD aspect of their business is the declining one, the dying one. We all see the handwriting on the wall. And me being an idiot was like, I don't know.

I think the DVD one is pretty good. Quality is higher. Selection is better. Why are they acting like that's not the future of Netflix? Yeah, yeah. Oh, boy. Yeah. Talk about making bad moves at Netflix.

I bought – I like trading in stock options. It's a lot of fun. It's a little hobby. And I've been playing Netflix for a while now. And we had that big crash of the market a couple of days in a row, but a couple of weeks actually. Where everything was just tanking.

So I'm like, alright, I'm finally going to bet against Netflix. Betting against Netflix. I bet against Netflix a couple of weeks ago. Like Christmas Eve? That thing has not stopped. It is a juggernaut. And then they announced the other day they're raising prices, subscription prices.

So it shoots $20 a share, it goes up. And then they're getting earnings is coming out uh tomorrow did you do options or did you short it i i do put options which is in essence shorting it um i'm actually buying the privilege to sell the stock at a certain price the reason i asked is with those options obviously you're just going to lose everything you put in it when you short it well now you have the ability to lose far more than you put in. Unlimited loss. Yes, that's why.

You can lose everything. No, no, I buy options. So I buy the ability to sell the stock at, let's say, $300 a share. And the stock goes down to $250 a share. I could still sell it at $3. So I don't own the stock goes down to $250 a share, I could still sell it at $3. So I don't own the stock, so now I have to buy it at $250, sell it at $3. I'm making $50 a share. So that's how the put option thing works.

But if it's above $300, why am I buying it at $3 or selling it at $3 when I have to buy them to replace them at $300 at $350. So you lose your investment. That's like betting at Blackjack and going, I'd like to invest $200 on this hand. I'm investing on this spin of the wheel, please. I'm investing $400 on the yo. Yeah, with options.

An option account on E-Trade is not investing. I am gambling. What is a call option? A call option is the opposite of the put. That's when you bet the stock's going to go up. So you buy the privilege. You're not actually buying the shares. You're buying the privilege of purchasing shares at a certain price.

So if I, again, buy the privilege of buying 100 shares at $300, if the stock goes up to $350, I still can buy 100 shares at $300, no matter what the price is. So I buy them and instantly sell them at $350. I've now made money. But again, if the price then goes down under 300, your set price is three. Why am I buying stock at 300 and selling it at 250? So again, you could lose your entire investment, but you're getting, you're paying pennies on the dollar per share shares at 300300, you could buy one option for $25. So, it's

not really as much, but again, you can't then sit it out and wait for the stock to go back up. You tend to gain and lose a lot more when you're in the options world, right? Usually you either make a ton or you lose everything. Whereas when you buy shares, if you buy shares at $200 and things go really

wrong, you probably still have shares at 150 right right right you got something left and then the other side of it the other thing i want to mention is usually a timeline right he's buying the option to buy that over the next 30 days or something there's expiration dates yeah so if you believe in netflix if you're a big fan you can buy that and hang on to it for 10 years but if you're buying options well now you're hoping that your big fanhood comes true in 30 days i knew people who were buying like a put option on apple whenever steve jobs first got diagnosed they thought that when steve jobs eventually died that apple was going to go under apple's going to go with them yeah it didn't happen didn't happen they lost a lot. Yeah. Not as bad as betting on Greece to fail, though.

I know your reference. I do. I have no idea. Yeah, this is some lame insider humor. I'll drop it now. Nothing makes me feel as retarded as looking at stock stuff and being like, oh, OK. Yeah, I don't know what any of this means. I don't know.

It's betting. You're kind of betting on this speculative thing that you have no say in, no input in. It's just what players are doing, the market makers are doing and god knows what insider bullshit they're pulling off because you're you cannot tell me that a ceo of a company that knows the company's going to make a big move isn't somehow getting the word to someone in some way to have money being made without him getting screwed for insider trading so uh but it has it's all information like the other day with netflix when they announced that they're raising prices, the day before, no one knew. The day after, $26 a share, it goes up.

No one knew. No one knew. Everyone knew. But now they're going to watch who buys the stock, who made a lot of money on it. Is there a connection? And they're going to be in trouble, unless they're a Clinton. Right, unless they're a Clinton. Right, unless they're a Clinton. There you go.

Then it's fine, apparently. Do you know that reference? Oh, yeah, we all know that reference. Kyle does, yeah. He made it. I figured he knew. I don't know that reference. Let me squeeze in a couple of advertisements here.

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Well, those were my best guesses. Nissan 330s, whatever the Nissan one is that people like. Yeah, he's got the hot rod Nissan sports car thing. Look at me, one for one. I didn't even know the name of the car is he a speeder a lot of tickets i don't think so but he you know he's a he's a little bit younger

uh any i i you know i don't know his driving record not that it matters i swear i i can't not drive fast in a in a nice car i've gotten two tickets, 200 mile an hour plus tickets in under a month, and they took my license for it. What kind of car? I went through all that shit. I got the F-Type,

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Absolutely. We should use them. Maybe replace Skype. Man, I'm a little drunk. It's hard to get through these reads. I love it. What are you drinking? You're doing great.

Vodka. Vodka? Vodka mixed with what? Just vodka. Vodka. I always forget with what? Just vodka. I always forget. You don't do your mixed drinks. You slug it down and then you have some OJ or whatever the fuck. Yeah, apple juice. It's tasty.

I fill up a fucking juice glass or something up to here with vodka and it's like three of the biggest gulps I can handle. I do three of those and I'm pretty fucking drunk. I could not operate a motor vehicle right now. That's how they told me to drink in those safety things as a kid.

It's like you don't want your parents to find out, so drink a ton all at once. Yep, that's how you do it. And then hide it and try to pretend. So you just pound, what would you call it, three shots? Oh, fuck no. Six or eight shots. Jesus Christ. Come on. what would you call it three shots oh fuck no six or eight shots jesus christ go on six or eight shots ish and then you chase it with apple juice and the goal is to get this buzz so

why prolong the unpleasant part i know i i figure you know i'll just kind of sit here and oh i'll have a bottle of wine and catch a little buzz. This guy's doing it the right way. Jesus. No added calories. I don't have a big mixed drink that's like two-thirds juice or vermouth or some poor shit. No, no, no. You drink enough vodka, it starts tasting kind of good anyway.

Do you spend a little money on the vodka itself, or it doesn't matter? I bounce around a little. Tito's. Tito's is the best. Tito's is good, man. Tito's is great. I've got a bottle of Ciroc in there right now I paid $70 for. Whereas Tito's is $30 for the same bottle. I prefer the Tito's. What is the tequila that you said is bad?

Because I thought that was Tito's. Jose Cuervo. Jose Cuervo is garbage tequila. It's not real tequila. Tequila is made from agave. People thought that was like. Jose Cuervo. Jose Cuervo is garbage tequila. It's not real tequila. Tequila is made from agave. People thought that was like a good tequila years ago. Oh, you got Cuervo. Now it's like, what's a good tequila now? Patron?

I drink Patron, yeah. Patron's okay. They have some good tequilas. But the real thing is you want the bottle to say 100% agave. Right, yeah, yeah. Because otherwise you're just getting, what am I thinking of? They put 51% agave in there, just so you can call it tequila.

And then 49% grain alcohol, which is like unfiltered, low-grade fucking alcohol. And that's why people get angry and whatever, fucked up. And they're just strapping it to kids and bringing it over the border. We got to get that wall built. Absolutely. Absolutely.

That is how tequila gets in the... That's how the tier Jose Cuervo gold makes it into this great company. That's it. You know how many times Jose Cuervo... They shove a fifth up a child's ass and make them walk across the border. He's been deported eight times. He keeps coming back. I don't know who this Jose Cuervo guy is, but you can't keep him out of here.

That's a great show, man. Okay, okay. Political talk. Did you guys see Pelosi's, like, what they're calling it, the power move? No, I don't know. No, I've been laughing too hard at that Gillette commercial. Oh, God, yes. That's awesome.

So the State of the Union is coming up. But I didn't know this apparently the president has to be invited to congress like that building like he doesn't just get to walk in he hilarious yeah i had no idea so pelosi's like you know what i'm a little worried about security that's horseshit we'll circle back to that uh you should just submit your state of the union in writing right and she's saying that because the government is shut down, they can't provide security. But what she really is saying is, I don't really want you to have this platform,

the State of the Union, to give me a whole bunch of shit. So why don't you just write me a letter? Which is what they did in the olden days. But it's Trump. And Trump gets an audience anytime he wants one. And I'm not sure if this is like a clever power move or one that will backfire. Oh, of course it will backfire. If I were him, I'd go on the steps of the fucking Lincoln Memorial.

Yeah, that would be great. Podium right there on the Lincoln Memorial. Sitting on the lap. Pack that shit. On Lincoln's lap. Ladies and gentlemen, the State of the Union is sound. It's just on Lincoln's lap. Lincoln's got cheeseburgers in his hands.

Two greats right here being Lincoln. That is hilarious. You guys know this. He did a lot of very, very good things for black people. He was also gay. People don't know. Like me, by the way. I think I've done more for black people in this country than this guy right now.

Unemployment rates lower now than they were at the end of the Civil War. Remember Trump, then Lincoln. We'll see. He didn't have a hotel to his name. I like the chess of politics i watch it all the time and see the moves and counter moves that people make and uh when trump did his nine minute address whatever a week ago that kind of sucked like it didn't change any minds and they thought he's not the environment where he thrives so is that what he like i don't know if it's going to help him or hurt him where the state of the union thing would have landed we'll see i think it'll do a speech like

that it was kind of weird for him in the oval office and stuff he does better in front of a crowd of people whether they love him or hate him he still does better in front of a crowd and uh i think he's got so much that was very focused on the border. The State of the Union, he's got so much to focus on with the economy and everything else that he's done that's happened under his presidency

that I think it's obviously a plus for him that the Democrats, especially Pelosi and Schumer don't want. I want to hear it because there's other cool stuff. He's pulling out of Syria. He's pulling out of Afghanistan. Of course, he's pushing for a border wall. These are all things I want to hear his take on.

He better pull through with getting out of Syria. Yeah, I'm with you. I feel like we're in a minority. A bunch of guys died today because I think directly because we said we're leaving, they're gonna step up the uh the bullshit to try to kill more uh americans before we could get out of there

so yeah they're like oh yeah the shias have been fighting since the year 650 but we're gonna solve it it's like no you're not retard get us out of there for reasons i don't fully understand apparently it's pretty difficult to get like six people they can't just leave you know like so they need to exit in a strategic way so that they're not vulnerable you know like for step one all the tanks and planes gone whatever we take a commercial like that that's a bad plan so i leave parties like that. I just like, all right, let's just leave. We can't say goodbye to everyone.

We'll talk to them tomorrow or I'll text or something. I do the royal wave. You leave. Irish goodbye, I guess they call it. I do the royal wave and say goodbye to everyone that way. Done. Goodbye. Look what's going on here.

This is great. Watch. Hold on. Is that the new cod? Yeah. She's probably improving your KD. That's her. She wouldn't play my fucking thing. She's so loud on my house. Hey, how you doing?

Just laughing at you playing. She's camping. She's been looking down that scope since we started watching her. Oh, I know. She's so much better. Tell that bitch to get moving. That would have been great if she turned around and got killed.

It's like, oh, bam! Oh, that would have been hilarious yeah it's constant gaming going on in here like whether it's there or this screen that i'm looking at or whatever like constantly game is going in the in the office there's a computer in there so just go in there and play uh sims or or skyline city skylines or something or poly bridges like when i was sick it was so weird i i had like aids i had i had that fucking cold flu thing that's been going around and it's just the worst it goes on on forever. And I didn't have the energy to play Battlefield or COD or anything.

So I just started playing Poly Bridges and SimCity games and stuff. Because you just don't have energy. But then you realize how frustrating they are too. I can't be... I play games to relax. No. I play games to get

pissed off and yell and say things that would have me thrown out of society. Yeah, even like SimCities and stuff like that. Because what the fuck with the traffic? I've made enough roads. The roads are huge. At the Sims, being like, why is there a black family next door? Well, there goes the neighborhood. That's your big thing

in The Sims is you want an all white sub. Oh, Jesus. I don't like The Sims thing. I don't like to micromanage each individual life so much, but the city games are pretty good. The City Skylines is pretty good. It's potato

chip gaming where you just sit there and keep going and going until you just get full and then give up. But yeah, but I don't I don't mind that. And some of it's pretty accurate. You know, you see some of this urban decay that happens in the game like it's like, oh, that's this. I kind of made Detroit. What happened? You're not very good at the game. I'm not very good. I didn't have enough schools. I took all the money from the police department. I taxed the shit out of everything.

Wow, look, it broke down. It's democratic rule. Kyle. Oh, I don't think you did your Rust update on the show, did you? No, I haven't talked about Rust, really. We got raided last night, and they blew up our base. So that was kind of expected. Your super base, though.

You were like the most powerful man in the server. No, because they reset it, remember? Mostly because there were so many of us in that little community. But every time someone would come in our neighborhood and start a fight like they they said that like we couldn't get involved with the fight which is bullshit because like there's a thing called counter rating when you're like rating someone's base everyone comes and gets involved and tries to kill the people who are trying to kill the base but we weren't allowed to do that because the admin was a faggot and so so the admin stopped taking your

side yeah yeah yeah yeah absolutely so so like they came and blew our base up last night and we're still new at the game so we don't know how to defend the base properly we don't know like all the ins and outs and they had rockets so they blew our base up that was fine because like you were doing the sister faction thing for ages And you were just more charming than the people who were attacking you. So the admin took your side. That wore out. Probably just a different admin. Not exactly, but we really didn't care anyway because tomorrow is the wipe.

So everything gets removed from that server. And plus, we want to get on a server where we can all play together as a big, big team. And as a big horde of people go run people down and have numbers against them. So tomorrow we begin that. 12-person teams, 24, 6? I don't know.

I don't know exactly. We haven't picked out a new server yet, but it'll be a minimum of 6, but maybe 12. I don't know, somewhere in there. I asked for gaming resumes, and I got a bunch it's cool like the guy the guy sent me a uh a resume let's see if i can pull it up quickly no i guess i can't but but he's like um that's serious yeah absolutely oh kyle did a call a

week or two ago for a few good men we're looking for people who maybe dropped out of college this winter and who have a lot of time on their hands. And they're specialists. We need a rust PVP expert. We need a guy who wants to grind. Do you like coming back with 10,000 sulfur? Join our clan.

Yeah. That's awesome. So he got a few good men and put together a super base, but then it got raided. Well, I mean, there's just two of us. It's a two-person base. It was expected. But the next server, obviously,

will be able to be a big team of people that I put together, and I think that's going to be a lot more fun anyway so that we're not constantly getting people saying, oh, there's three of you. No, there's not. There's two of us. We were getting called out for being three of us when it was it was literally just two of us how many are you hoping to get with uh after the server wipe and you get another server we're gonna go to another server and and i don't know six to twelve

something like that somewhere in there like it'll be a big group of us and and i'm only picking people who just i don't want to say no lives, but for whatever reason. I understand. Life has put you in a position where you have 18 hours to devote to Rust. They have great lives. I'm looking for people with exceptional lives in which they can spend 12 hours a day playing Rust with me.

We're going to grind hard and it's going to be glorious bastards. I need to be eight soldiers. Eight Jewish American soldiers. I need me 100. They all have to be Jews. I prefer Jews. They're more conscientious.

Are there naked people walking around? Is there a mold and rust kind of? People like to be naked. You begin the game completely naked. Cops with pussy hanging out right right and and and like even once you've gotten to a stage where like you might have like a lovely outfit with armor and a machine gun you'll still see that look at that naked guy there fuck him

go take his rock go take his rope and his rocks and his spear yeah fuck that guy because we can't find rocks without murdering people first. Can they loot your clothes off of you? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. So then you're just like, ah, fuck, I'm naked again. Oh, you're dead then. You die because of everything you have.

It's a real, like, there's real highs and there's real lows. If you get killed, you lose everything that you had, and that might have been your only copy of those things. Right, and there's super high is there like really good loot that you will just lose forever if yeah incredibly important loot like you might work you might literally work for 100 man hours to acquire this thing and if you die they have this thing and like, ah, we didn't have to spend 100 hours because he did it for us. So you will yell racial epithets out at the screen. They will.

They'll write them to you. They'll have you write them to me. Oh my god. And then they'll put that child porn on your IP. You got to be careful who you piss off in this game. I try to be friendly. But yeah, I'm picking a new server tomorrow. We're going to pick a new server.

We'll all get to play together. Won't have any people calling us out for teaming or whatever the fuck. That's interesting. I haven't played this or really researched it or anything. You seem to be real resistant to the teaming accusation. We are teaming.

Teaming is when you roam together as more than two individuals killing things. And you just neighborhooded. Right? Where you and all your neighbors got along and were friendly. That's exactly what we did. And everybody does that. The people who start war with their neighbors are stupid.

Right up until someone decides they're going to be an asshole and start a war like that. This takes one guy. But it's like if you don't have the ability to completely wipe them out, then you antagonize someone. So every time you walk out of your door, they're shooting bows and arrows at you. And it's like, well, fuck, I wanted to go do a fun thing. And now I'm in a petty squabble with my neighbor here.

Well, isn't it good to maybe be like Negan? Well, well, look what we got here. I could have been shot 30 times, but you talked to me instead of shooting me. Fuck that show. Fuck that show. I refuse to watch another episode of that show ever in my life. That show is such

fucking garbage. It's such fucking garbage. I'll never watch that show again. I was so, like, they sucked me back into it when Glenn got killed, that big scene where Negan bashes their heads in. And the finale the season before was amazing. I'm like, oh, wow, okay, I'm back for the next season.

I come back, and I was like, all right, this is terrible. And then that one episode where they're all ambushed, they're set up for an ambush on Negan. When he comes out on the stairs, he's right there to be shot. Everyone has a gun on him. He comes out and it's like, Negan, you're a mean guy. And they want to talk to him Shoot him he's right there

The punters would not have done that None of them were good shots though No they're terrible shots They're only good shots when there's zombies And then it's just like Headshot they're John Wick against zombies But when it comes to like person versus person Combat they're like oh no

I lost control of my weapon and that is so true and this is one of the biggest shows on television they have they literally have the the the graphics or the special effects of a youtuber i know youtubers with better special effects than these people like the bullets like sparking yeah it i was screwing with After Effects, the program of After Effects, back like a decade ago. Better than the deer, the funny deer that they put up there. The blood, like the CGI blood. I don't expect them to use a squib and a packet for every shot that they're putting off in that show. But get a guy that can make it look kind of real.

It's terrible. It's so bad. It's so bad. I hate the show. I'll never watch the show again. They've sucked enough money and my time out of me. I'll never watch it again. It's a bad show.

They have a huge audience, and they've squandered it. They went from 15 million viewers to like 5 million viewers. By the way, 5 million is a huge audience. Still. That's the problem. But fuck them. That episode with Rick getting killed was so

stupid. I didn't watch it. I saw it. Oh, good for you. I only watched that. I didn't watch any of the other, but I'm like, alright, I'll watch it. I saw it. Oh, good for you. I only watched that. Like, I didn't watch any of the other, but I'm like, all right, I'll watch it. And again, I was like, why did I do this? Dude, I think I'm current unless they start it up again for the second half of this season. And I can hardly pay attention to it. It doesn't, I try to watch it.

I get sucked into something else. I was waiting for like episode nine for a while before I realized that oh the half season ended at eight and i didn't even i didn't watch the show enough to know that the season ended i think that guy what's his name that we were just talking about that was uh yeah yeah i think he made the best move ever getting out of that to not be so typecast and making other movies uh i think you're right because it's going to be really hard for old rick grimes to uh go into other roles with people not going hey it's rick grimes who's the is his name daryl yeah daryl that's another one i think he's making he's always going to be daryl but at least he's getting rich i mean he's had a whole career before

that you know he was in Boondock Saints. Boondock Saints. Boondock Saints. It's really good. And I live down here where that show's filmed. And so I go down there where they film it sometimes. And Daryl owns a bar down here. Oh, really?

Yeah. These guys have been investing in the area that they work in so much. Because they do do that double season. So they're here eight or nine months of the year working. Yeah. So he's around. And it's kind of weird like i was i was having breakfast at a restaurant in that area and i i look over the the girl i'm with like looks over my shoulder so i look over my shoulder and there's two fucking zombies staggering down the sidewalk that looks so realistic that i've

got some redneck buddies that would have blown them away. It's happening! It's happening! I knew it! I've been ready! It's going down! He's got an arrow sticking out of him and he's lumbering dizzily down the... I'm like, what the fuck is that? They're like, yeah, they do that here. I was like,

are they getting paid by the Chamber of Commerce or something? She's like, I don't know. I don't know. I think they're just weird people. All right. Well, that's like professional movie I don't know. I don't know. I think they're just weird people. Alright. Well, that's like professional movie makeup they're wearing. It doesn't look like a Halloween costume. It looks like a fucking real-ass zombie out there. That's creepy. Cosplaying on their own time. Yeah, absolutely. There's a lot

of tourists there because you can see a lot of the sets from the movie. I want to say the church that was in one of the early seasons where they found that black preacher who locked his parishioners out of it or whatever. That church, I think, is an Airbnb down here you can stay in. And in it are framed photographs that Carl painted. It's a whole little community of walking dead man.

I watch them. They'll cut off an entire half of the city sometimes when they're filming. Oh, wow. I guess they pay the train company to roll a long-ass freight train across the tracks, and it cuts the city in half. And it's like, well, we can't go to that side now because they're filming. Wow. That's some pull, man.

The show's filmed in a really lousy area. Confirmed? I live there. What? No, it's nice. It's nice.'s nice all right so i watched two moto vloggers now i hear it's a total shithole no i watched two moto vloggers take their little motorcycles to like where the walking dead is filmed and it's funny because i see the walking dead not a set but like backdrops that i'm used to seeing in a different context and it was kind of cool and two guys tried to carjack him, and when they froze him,

you could see he was pulling a gun out of his waistband, and they just sort of took off and ran away, which is why I thought it was a bad neighborhood. They couldn't play it different? Like, oh, Rick, there are more humans here! Yeah, hey!

Don't trust them. No, I don't. I got into that show after your guys' recommendation, and I stopped watching it after you guys told me the most recent season sucked dick. The last thing I remember is Negan caving that Asian guy and that red-headed dude skull in, and I thought it was pretty good. That was really good, that first episode. And then they just drug out

basically they wanted to establish that these guys were really feeling down about it. And that took like 16 hours to explain. It was... Move the fucking plot along. What they would do, like, they know everyone's watching and just

wants to advance. They want the plot to advance. They would do so many scenes everyone's watching and just wants to advance they want the plot to advance they would do so many scenes where they're playing some shitty song and they would do these push-ins on people's faces while they're driving like one by one the entire cast and then someone else that's someone else looking sad and it's like 10 minutes of this shit we don't care about this artsy fartsy but i don't even think it's that i think they're just literally trying to waste time waste your time they wrote a half hour episode and with commercials and everything else uh they have to even stretch that so it's like what Family Guy has become at the end

where like Family Guy kind of sucked the last few years like it was really good back in the day I thought it was funny originally like the chicken fighting bit and everything it was like this isn't funny and it also takes a long time but I guess they thought it was going to be a recurring bit now you'll see that and it'll

genuinely take up three minutes of an episode and it's like oh They just they just had don't have anything the longest scene. I get so pissed at that chicken fight That's kind of a joke right like yeah, I think it's the fish It's like the plausible deniability of the joke though because I used to be a joke now I genuinely think it's like they don't have enough shit to fill it up like they're trying to stretch they recently said they're going to phase out the gay jokes

yeah I read that today so if you thought it wasn't funny then wait till you see the new season yeah they're phasing out gay jokes which I don't understand why because they're still going to joke about other things and other people, so

they don't want gays to be equal? Did they do a ton of gay jokes? Yeah. Stewie's been gay the whole time. They joke about Stewie being gay. There was an episode where, I want to say they did some sort of experiment where they injected Peter with a

gay serum. That was a funny episode. Oh, and he was gay. That was a really funny one. He was gay. Yeah, you won't see that. But really stereotypically gay. Yeah, that was funny.

Yeah, you won't see that. Yeah, you won't see that anymore. No more funny for you. It hasn't been good since What's-His-Name stopped writing, the creator. I can't think of his name right now. You know what a better show is than that at this point is American Dad.

That's way funnier than, I think it a better show is than that at this point? It's American Dad. That's way funnier. I think it's funnier than Family Guy at this point. I don't know. I'm not a big fan of it. I think it's alright. South Park, I haven't watched their whole new season. Better than last season, but that's not saying much because the last two

prior to this were kind of shit. The episodes are hit or miss and they're trying just... It's weird when you cross that line of trying a little too hard like they were always known for being able to nail what's happening in society and politics and everything like just nail it and satirize it and make a really funny joke about it now it's like oh you're trying a little too hard i see what you're doing here yeah so it's not as funny they're just they're getting burnt out i'd have to imagine especially the way fucking south park the way they do it where uh it's either called five days to air or six days to air or something it's this documentary about the south park team

doing an episode and it shows their entire process and it's super super good i recommend everybody watch it if you have it and it just shows like like like when you watch a family guy a simpsons or whatever that episode's been in the can ready to go for months and months and months like south park it'll be three days before airtime and trey and matt are like we got to figure out the last part of this episode what the fuck? Everybody's staying here overnight to try and get this done. It was the human centipede episode they were doing for that. You're watching their riffs develop and everything.

That was really cool. But that also works better when you do... If you're gonna do it every week, you need to have one-off episodes where it's like, this is silly and goofy as shit, and next week the whole gang's back for something else. They tried to do the whole plot arc, where it's

like, you're almost screwing yourself, because you're having to every week rethink of a new way that this fits into the plot that you're trying to keep. Yeah, it's a continuous season-long storyline, and the one-offs were a lot better. Yep.

I got a bolt, guys. I hate having to do this. What? I gots to go. No worries. Yeah, you got to be back sooner this time, man. I know. It was ridiculous.

I had so much shit going on. I put the book out, of course. Yes, it's a book. We're going to everybody find that. Tell me about the book. Yeah, tell us what we'll find. It's permanently suspended, it's a book. Where can everybody find that? Tell me about the book. Yeah, tell us and we'll find it. It's permanently suspended, it's called, because I have been permanently suspended pretty much from every...

I love that, too. Isn't that expulsion? Like, suspended. If you're permanently suspended, you're expelled. That's what I remember from school. So, yeah, I'm permanently suspended. That's the book. It's Amazon, BarnesandNoble.com, CompoundMedia. So, uh, yeah, I'm permanently suspended. That's the book. It's, uh, Amazon barnesandnoble.com compoundmedia.com where, uh, you can find me, uh, uh, Monday through Thursday at 4 PM Eastern.

But, uh, it's just, it's a lot of the behind the scenes stuff that happened with, uh, the Opie and Anthony show. Uh, some of the stuff of me growing up, my life out in California with my dad, old guns, broads, whiskey, and dune buggies, and kind of built me into the fine, upstanding citizen you see sitting before you today. But it was a lot of fun to do, and I really do go into some detail about what went on with the ONA show and when the problem started with Opie and myself. It was a lot earlier than people thought. An interesting read, as people have said, and I appreciate it. Nice. I'll need to check that out.

I want to know more about the ins and outs of ONA. And it's got a couple of pitches in it. I like a book with pitches. Did you draw them? I drew them myself. That's awesome.

Everybody check out Ant's book, compoundmedia.com. Got to get you back on soon. Absolutely, man. You guys are great. I talk about you guys all the time. I'd like to do this show more often, that's for sure. Thanks for coming on. Definitely, dude.

Thank you, gentlemen. I'll see you next all the time. I'd like to do this show more often, that's for sure. Thanks for coming on. Definitely, dude. Thank you, gentlemen. I'll see you next time, man. Thanks. Later, Anthony. He doesn't know how to hang up. That's great. I know. He's like, how does Skype work?

You know what? I think you're going to put my girlfriend on the show. I swear. He's such a fucking boomer. He's like, yeah, I have to go, but I don't know how. So our new guest is his couch. He did not have to hang up. He figured it out.

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saying that that was vodka like made of grapes or some shit on pkn that's not right right yeah it's right oh so it actually is made of grapes or it's just grape flavored vodka no it's not grape flavor it's made of grapes that just that doesn't sound right but i don't know anything about how vodka's made you can i think you can make vodka out of anything. Like Tito's is corn vodka. And there's also, of course, potato vodka. And I'm sure... Ciroc is the one, a rapper made that, right? I have no

fucking clue. Sean Puffy Combs. Oh, that's P. Diddy's vodka, huh? Yeah. Sean Puffy Combs. Well, it's not good. Oh. You hear that? Sean Puffy Combs well it's not good oh you hear that sean puffy combs your vodka your grape vodka sucks dick you should feel bad about it i i just got the big pretty expensive bottle because i wanted to try something different and uh i i'm let down it has a weird funny taste to it that i'm not familiar with in a vodka. So Tito's Vodka

for the win. I wish they were a sponsor and I had an endless supply of Tito's Vodka because it is delicious. Handmade American vodka. Made with corn in Austin, Texas. Get us a sponsorship with Tito's. Kyle, you're probably the best spokesperson

for Tito's. Now, I've been using Tito's all day and I'm going to read why it's so good it's more fun if you don't drink responsibly I don't even know what responsible drinking is what is that when you like

go to a job interview drunk what does that mean Tito's is such a pure vodka when you go to Wendy's after the show, you drive yourself because you're okay. You're fine. The cops are not even going to know. Yeah.

He's going to say, sir, did you get a curly fries? No, they don't have curly fries at Wendy's. That's Arby's. He's going to be like, you're right. We're going to laugh. He's just going Wendy's. That's Arby's. And he'd be like, you know, you're right. And we're going to laugh. He's just going to leave. That's all she wrote.

That's all she wrote. Just get fucking shithoused on Tito's for the first episode they sponsored us. That'd be hilarious. Oh, I would definitely be. Butt chugging. Butt chugging with Tito's. Oh, yeah. I'm sure that would meet Woody uh parameters of things that won't bring

shame to my family i remember he said that thing like for the punishments way back when and someone was like they play the clip of him going like i don't want to do anything that'll bring shame to my family and then the music kicks it's like and it's him doing like shameful things just him on all fours on that carpet spreading his ash cheeks like like him doing the most shameful things yeah yeah like like just just do incredibly embarrassing things that you'd never want someone to be like is this your dad is this your dad the one on the floor spreading his butt cheeks is that him i'm an orphan i was adopted by that old man. There's going to have to be a time in my life when I have children and everything

and they get to the cognizant age that I have to make sure they never know I did a podcast. They won't know. They'll be like, back in his heyday, Taylor used to do the internet. I'll be like, yeah, that's all i did just the internet

didn't do any podcasting didn't say that man if like pc culture continues on this trajectory this is gonna look bad in like like 30 years i think it's gonna rubber band back right it's gonna totally rubber band back we'll have some white supremacists taking over in in three years in three years the year after trump or whoever gets elected the the white supremacists coming out in force tiki torches in hand dozens of them across the country uh i love those little memes it's like they show who's going to be the president for like the next 30 years and it's all trump's until you get to baron Trump literally being elected in the year 2044 or whatever

it's going to be. I love those. Do you see the size of that kid? He's a pretty tall kid. He's like 6 feet tall and he's like 12. I think some of the Trump photoshops are so fucking funny. There was one where this person on Twitter posted like,

Ever since Trump touched that orb with the saudis his arms have been growing longer and it's just like it's a photo of him walking with normal arms and then like it'll be like it's like presented seriously like a week later and his arms are like longer down to like below his knees and like another week later he's walking up like air force one and his hands are dragging behind him and of course there's people like in the comments like i don't know what that orb was but that's satanic it's like the president's arms aren't actually growing oh he turned him into sort of sort of a stretch arm stroke i i haven't seen that that's pretty fucking comical i i i think i thought he looked pretty good at that uh that thing where he was serving the burgers and fries to Clemson.

That was so fucking funny. So funny. Like, the worst part about it is that the burgers were cold. I think you said that on TV. They had to be so cold. That's totally true. That's why, like, the right choice there would have been the pizza and the fries. Because there was a photo of the pizza and fries.

They had heat lamps on them. So that's what you'd want. Lincoln's heat lamps.incoln's heat lamps you want you want that shit catered so that there's like trays like metal trays full of food i wish i was thinking like if it was just like a regular cater company though like that's what i was you know kind of thinking a bit too but like they might get shit on like if it's like jo Joe's fucking catering and he caters, a lot of people might hate the fact that he's catering a Trump event with the government shut down. Especially if it's in fucking

D.C., they might be like, screw that guy. We're not going to Joe's fucking sandwich shack anymore. So I can see why they did it for a multinational company. But he probably, he genuinely probably did it because he wanted a Big Mac. I wouldn't be surprised. Wouldn't put it past him.

Do you have Postmates where you are? Do you have a lot of options? Yeah. Yeah, I've got a lot of stuff on Postmates. I have so many options. It's shocking. Even now, I just looked over. I've got Waffle House, Popeyes, Burger King, Del Taco, KFC, and Ruby Tuesdays.

What do you think I should go with, Taylor? Well, what kind of category of food are you going for? You want a burger? You want like an appetizer splurge where you try a bunch of different things? That's a fun thing to do ordering off of like Postmates. It's like just going to a place and picking like five appetizers. That's always an enjoyable way to eat, I think. I'm in the mood for Chinese.

Chinese sounds good to me. So if there's a Chinese place around you, I'd get that. No, I click refresh and they're all available later. God damn it! Can you help me catch up? What's available later? Talk about Postmates. They like all their options and stuff.

They're not a sponsor or anything tonight, but we're just big fans. Kyle's a genuine fan. Absolutely. I got sushi today. It was wonderful. Did you guys see the Gillette commercial that everybody's mad about no i haven't seen i've only heard about it i don't know if we probably can't watch it because

it's on like their official youtube channel right like i wouldn't want to i i'm sure there's music i don't recall exactly the music but it is in there so we probably shouldn't can you explain what the controversy is and what's up with it because i just seen about it and somehow it didn't pull me in yeah the only thing that offended me about it is it's bad advertising like it's it's just the straight up a bad ad like it's not good at kind of tickling the fancy of your main demographic and so like i was watching it like how are they expecting to make more money off this but but the funny part of it was how everybody reacted because it's really it's just an ad where it's basically instead of being like the best a man can get well men are kind of shitty and then it'll show a bunch of guys doing like shitty things like

bullying and like a bunch of guys wearing grills being like boys will be boys excusing their their sons fighting and and then shows like a guy standing there like and then it shows like some good men you know some token good men way more bad than good but like like people are all in a hullabaloo about it and it's against toxic masculinity and like twitter was fucking hysterical around it because you'd have somebody post like he was fine with it and be like hey everybody uh this ad is just about getting rid of toxic masculinity not the bad not the good kind of masculinity we don't want to get rid of that we just want to get rid of the toxic kind and getting rid of toxic masculinity that helps you men too because then toxic masculinity is what makes it so you can't express your feelings and you can't

truly feel heard you know don't you want to get cast those shackles off and feel heard with your feelings and everything and then if someone responds like i don't like how they make all men seem bad by default in this razor commercial. And that same person from the front will be like, you're a fucking pussy, queer, dick sucking incel loser who doesn't get any pussy. You're a bitch. You're a bitch. And you're so triggered by this commercial. And it's like, how fucking perfectly ironic is that?

It's like someone will say, this is so men feel like they can just like get their feelings out a little more. Don't be afraid to share. And then some guy shares how they don't like it. And they're like, you pussy, you don't understand.

We're trying to get rid of your kind of masculinity. You're being toxic right now. And it was like, like, first of all, if you have that strong of a stance either way on this razor commercial you gotta take a step back i like to direct my ear towards kardashian pepsi commercials i you know you're right that that is the priority but like i don't

know i just it's funny like when they make stuff like that and the internet responds in a way that's totally antithetical, which to what ostensibly they were trying to achieve. There is kind of a issue that, there are segments of society that act like most men are bad. That by default, you know what? We should teach men not to rape.

Like, I love the comeback. Like we should teach women not to throw their babies in dumpsters. You know, like, yeah, this, this,

maybe in class, it could be part of, like, a health class and physical education. Stop throwing your baby in dumpsters. Like,

have like three images, like a woman putting a baby in a car seat, green check mark. A woman putting a baby in a crib, green check mark. A woman,

like, slam dunking a baby with the umbilical cord hanging out into a fucking dumpster red x yeah yeah because women need to understand that throwing babies in dumpsters is bad and that is the parallel to acting like you know all men are rapists that is so silly like you'll see people like like actual mainstream politicians or public figures, be like, stop telling me to be careful. Tell men not to rape. And it's like, how inculcated in your own world are you that you think that's not a thing?

We've talked about it before. Name one crime other than child sex crimes in this country that's more reviled than rape. I would rather be accused of murder than rape yeah i would i've said it before i would rather be accused of murder than rape everyone would rape culture exists just not in america right like i've been told rape culture exists in india where they blame the woman for this we i think we've heard in the middle east in a bunch of places right where you know the all the guy has to say is that she wanted it or what were you doing not walking with your cousin or brother right the rape culture is a thing on earth but in america no one hears a guy raped and says like ah you know it's cool yeah like it's the it's the complete opposite of that it's like those people

are pretending that reality is totally the opposite of what it is when they pretend that like rapists are lauded and people are like let that rapist go nobody i've never met that guy where is that guy is he must be out there somewhere if you're talking about him all the time like i've never met him introduce me to mr uh actual rape apologist i'm sure there are actual people out there who just hate women enough like i mean like what he always says like where is this going one rape doesn't make you a rapist right right like if i bake one am i if i bake if i bake one cake am i a baker no you won't know you're a bakist you know all i did is try something A man who hasn't committed one rape. Cast the first stone.

Cast the first stone. What was that TV show or movie where some out-of-touch white guy is like, oh, yeah, he's a rap singer, a rapist? You know? I was like, a rap singer, a rapist? I don't remember what that is. That was fucking funny, though. But, yeah, the Gillette commercial was kind of, like, like itself i just think it's a bad ad but is it really it's just the uh the reaction to it

that's funny so i wonder if you have people don't know taylor works uh somewhere in the world of media advertising marketing so he has a professional opinion on the colin kaepernick ad with the dust settled what do you think it got a lot of attention not all of it positive though uh it got a lot of attention like it's it's gonna be fine in the same way that gillette's gonna be well gillette's a little different and i'll explain why i think well this is just me you know armchair guessing like nike they were like kind of trying to get their woke uh base to really double down and buy a lot more shoes and their stock went up and so it ended up being a good move for i don't know how their stock has now

it's probably gone back to how it ever it was before but you know so it ended up not being that big of a bad move for them and most people at the end of the day outside of twitter and facebook don't fucking care about this shit like they just they don't fucking care. Razors, on the other hand, so already razors are priced really expensive, like Gillette and Schick and all those in-store brands. It's retarded how expensive those products are for shit-tier razors. Really, those store-bought ones, they're often very shit and they're very expensive.

And so there's been an uptick. Gillette doesn't have premium razors? do but like they do like premium disposable and like they're still not that good like at the end they're really not that good and so what has been a movement in like the last couple decades because uh razor prices are getting so high and just you know they're adding extra blades so they can rationalize making their margins a little larger put some in there sideways who gives a fuck. Put some in there sideways. Who gives a fuck? Yeah, put some in there sideways. You need shit, seven blade, this and that. It doesn't actually shave your face better. It'll give you the illusion

it does, and it causes a little bit of face irritation, which means you'll need to scream. So basically, more people have been going towards the safety razor route, which is just one of those. You take a cheap-ass razor blade, you put it inside the safety razor, close it down, and those things are cheap as fuck. They'll last you for a lifetime a lifetime and a year supply of blades might cost you 10 bucks like

they're cheap as shit and once like people jump off and get out of the disposable razor game if they finally decide this is too expensive and i really don't care for this commercial i'm going to do something else like they're not going to revert back to disposables of any brand because they'll found a solution that's like more comfortable. And so there's a reason that people are using safety razors more and more or straight razors. Like that's kind of more, I think, silly because like those aren't even that effective. What are you going to do? Like be like a fucking old school barber sharpening like that?

Like, no, just replace the blade and the safety razor. Oh, really? Jumping away from disposables? Because there's a reason they jumped from safeties too, like years ago. There is. Yeah. But like it's just a matter of price for a lot of people now because razors used to not be as expensive as they are like there's a reason you walk into cvs walgreens at least where i live uh like they're behind plastic like you have to take them up there and they unlock them because people steal that shit all the time they still right there in st louis oh yeah right yeah, right here in St. Louis.

They steal razors. Shocking. Like, Nike's going to be fucking fine. Gillette, they're also going to be fucking fine, but I think they will see a little bit of consumer base leaving for cheaper alternatives. And not even because of this commercial, just for some people that might be the final boot of like,

hey, I'm not a shit guy and I buy your razors. Fuck you. I'm going to take a cheaper route. Oh, what do you know? I can do this. But at the end of the like, Hey, I'm not a shit guy and I buy your razors. Fuck you. I'm going to take a cheaper route. Oh, what do you know? I can do this. So, but at the end of the day,

Gillette doesn't give a fuck because Gillette's owned by P and G and P and G is a gigantic corporation that like if Gillette went under P and G is okay. They're fine. Like they could lose Gillette. Like, so they, they can afford to, you know,

some of those consumer goods companies where one owns everything is surprising like the media. It's like, Disney owns all that? Holy smokes! And that happens in P&G and is it Colgate, another one? I don't know. But there's Procter & Gamble, I think.

That's P&G. Procter & Gamble, Johnson & Johnson. There's a lot of those big companies glaxo smith klein there's a ton of huge ones out there that like you won't even know and you'll be like well goddamn the people who make prozac make lego my ego commercials too they've really got a corner on it feeling sad try prozac or some fucking waffles i don't know whatever whatever would make you feel better currently yeah yeah so yeah it's not going to impact Gillette's business one way or the other that significantly but I can see some consumers leaving for the safety razor thing just because

more so for the price but they're yeah it's it's part of the you know is all press good press thing because people talk about Gillette people normally don't talk about Gillette yeah I mean like and at the same time all these people make an art like me like fucking fat-headed retard me make an armchair analysis of this it's like png is not the kind of company where like don draper is sitting in there in the 50s was like you know what we need to talk about with razors is women getting molested like they're're all like, Don, fantastic, mark it down. That's not the way they do shit anymore. There's entire wings of analytic people figuring shit out,

doing little micro-studies and stuff. And so if P&G did it, chances are they know they're going to get a good ROI. So I think that if you're going to ask anyone, ask them. Like, we'll see in a week or two when it blows over and their stock's probably doing great. So, I don't know. I'm out of my... So, Kyle, I wonder how you handle this. I was at the doctor's office.

They asked me what I did. And I said, oh, you know, I've got this podcast or whatever. And it's a female woman, seemed nice. And she's like, oh, what is your podcast called? I'd like to do it. And she wants to know more about it. And what I should have said is, no, you have far too much class for my show. It wouldn't fit for you. But what I actually said was like, no, we tell dick jokes. And she gave me this really disapproving look that I didn't like. But it's hard to answer what you do for a living. I go to the next area,

like the cashier type person at the doctor's office. She asks me what I do for a living. And my temptation was to say, fuck you. Why do you need to know what I do for a living? Do I pry? Classic Woody. I didn't say this,

but it's like, why is everyone prying into what I do here for a living? Fuck off with your questions um i'm a full full-on rapist i'm a vapist land a plan i help people yeah this is a philanthropist what do you tell people when they ask you what you do for a living oh i'll just tell you do a podcast and if they ask and they want to see it you tell them oh it's pka i i tell them you know we do you know politics and we have you know sort of comedy and we have uh politics and sports and we really bounce around we just kind of have a discussion

we just kind of hang out and talk and watch videos and stuff and it's a i i'm like it's adult oriented so if you so if uh adult language offends you it's probably not for you but you know it's sort of it's definitely an adult show and it's fun and it's funny and it's four hours though so no that going in so you know it's kind of hard to just jump right into

but I think you'd like it yeah check it out if you want to or don't I don't fucking care fuck you just say it's a funny comedy podcast Dr. Smith not giving my dick pills not giving my dick pills

you bitch yeah yeah I don't know that's the easiest way to say it just well i do a comedy show i should have said that she wanted to she wanted my help in finding it and i didn't want to share that part of my life with the doctor's nurse person yeah you could say that to you like i like to keep my real life separate from that life it's it's best if there's sort of a have you seen game of thrones you know how they got the wall this is the wall we're having right now you're looking at it just you we have this relationship and then me and my friends we uh we talk about rape what i actually told the second person was i'm semi-retired and often that leads to more questions

because I'm a little young for that yeah just say that you're fully retired that's easy or say something that like you know it'll shut down the conversation well me and my friends are all avowed white supremacists and we talk about all the things

we hate about and she'll be like alright well okay let me go get the eye job and you're like, alright, well, okay. Let me go get the eye surgery. Alright, smoothed by that. Don't put that in my file. I'm glad you asked. I am the Grand Cyclops of the Southeastern chapter of the glorious

Ku Klux Klan. Now, do you have half an hour to sit down and have a little conversation? Because we're having a meeting Saturday night. Is Cyclops a thing? I know Wizard is, but it seems like Cyclops could be. Oh, yeah, yeah. There's a Grand Cyclops.

Yeah, absolutely. And you're it. I tell people all the time. They're like, what does Woody do? I'm like, well, we do this show together, but he's a Grand Cyclops. He is from North Carolina. You know, they got all those Jim Crow laws and stuff. Oh, yeah.

The man could live anywhere he wanted. He picked North Carolina. There's a reason for that, okay? It was that or Alabama. You know what's bullshit? There is a grand Cyclops. The KKK got to take fun-sounding names. You're trying to trick me. Sometimes I just make things up. I knew the KKK had those silly names, but isn't that bullshit that they stole all those potentially fun and funny names like the grand wizard and the grand cyclops and the grand poobah or whatever all the things they said and now they've stolen that

forever and no one else can have it wouldn't you love to be like the grand wizard of your magic the gathering like team right now that'll never be reality. You should be. You should just go with it. They stole it. Just go with it. I am the white grand wizard. That makes it worse. There must be a white magic deck. You could play that one exclusively.

Oh, you're playing a black deck? Is there a white deck? So much potential. Oh, yeah, there is. There's white, black, green, red, blue. All the colors you can play. No yellows. That is really lame.

That's what the grand cyclops of the white deck would say. No yellows. You know how the Nazis stole the swastika from the Hindus? Simple for the sun. That's bullshit. They stole. It was just Hitler like the sun everlasting that's bullshit they stole like it was just hitler like oh that's pretty cool yeah and they're just kind of fretting it away over there just in in whatever they do poop in the street i i mean you know what fuck is this i'm stealing it what are they going to do putting it on the flag back back and it's going to look so

crisp was india in the war in the world War II? Did they have any role at all? India, actually, I think... I think... Didn't the Nazis do something in India? They were a British... Ah, that would make a reason why the Nazis didn't like them. Or I don't know the history. I don't fucking know.

I'll make it up. Oh, wait. They were a British colony, so they liked Nazis, right? Because Nazis didn't like their suppressors. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. But Indians hated... Yeah. They were a British colony, so they liked Nazis, right? Because Nazis didn't like their suppressors. Yeah. Yes. Yeah.

But Indians hated, yeah. Yeah, the Britons. The Britons! The Britons! Yeah. I love Monty Python. I'm thinking of it like Age of Empires. Yeah. They're longbowmen.

They added Monty Python onto Netflix again. I'm probably going to watch that tonight. I love that shit. I haven't watched that in forever. That's so good. I'm the only person who doesn't like it. I know. This year.

I think it's all right. Monty Python, most of it is just hit or miss. It's not that hysterical. I like it. I like it a lot. I love the movies. I like the movies a lot. And the shows.

Kind of like SNL. It's a little hit or miss, but it's a sketch show. I was going to call it SNL because they did take one joke and drive it into the ground for 12 minutes in a row. The Ministry of Silly Walks. I haven't watched. Oh, the Ministry of Silly Walks is really funny. I have a new walk that I was hoping I could get funding for.

Well, let me see it. Oh, no, no, no. This is a funny is this this is a silly walk and he does this like crazy wampus walk like great i love that shit it's fucking hilarious i saw one there's one where he like buys a canary and he tries to return the dead canary he's like it was dead when i bought it. Look it, this is a dead bird. Like, flops it on the table, little feathers flop out. He's like, no, he's just sleeping. That's all. He's having a nap. A nap?

This is a deceased bird. Deceased bird. I've got a I've got a funny hopefully it'll be funny I haven't read through it all yet uh post on reddit that's kind of older and it says I found it

on I think you guys probably already know of this one but it's called Jesus Christ reddit and it's like really inappropriate like horrible things that you see there yeah so i was looking at that uh and this one's called wife told me she wanted to experiment i obliged then she attempted to eat my feces and so let's is that worth reading yes okay throw away account because my wife follows my regular account here my 28 or i'm 28 my 28 m wife 26 f i don't know how you're supposed to read that and i have

admittedly had very vanilla sex throughout our three-year marriage we had our first kid a year ago and it seriously slowed down her sex life however a little over a little under a month ago she approached me about trying new things she's been hanging out with a group of moms in our neighborhood and one of them told her that she and her husband tried pegging and it was complete and it had completely transformed their marriage my wife told me that she wanted to try pegging as well to spice things up. At first I thought it was a joke, but soon realized she actually wanted to peg me.

I'd never done ass play before and had always lived by the philosophy that the anus is solely an exit. My wife made it clear that this was important to her, so a few days later I obliged. The next week, she pegged me and everything was surprisingly enjoyable. Additionally, the week following,

the pegging was one of the best weeks we've had together since the birth of our child. I really thought he was going to say that his bowel movements were better than they were previously. No, it was just the best week since the birth of our child. Better than father. Yeah. His first words, fine. Getting plowed in the ass by my wife with a plastic dick. Tops.

We were back to our old sex life doing things like having sex before work and even waking each other up with head however that next weekend she told me she wanted to peg me again i was slightly confused as to why this last week of sex wasn't cutting it for but i agreed that's when things took an extreme turn during the second pegging while my wife was inside of me she grabbed my hair craned my neck to the right and pressed our foreheads together i had never seen her take control like this and thought it was very hot until she looked me in the eye and whispered, I want your shit. I pulled my face away and asked her to repeat, and she said, I want you to shit on me.

I pushed her off of me and asked if she was joking, and she started crying. I felt like a fucking dick because she thought I was kink-shaming her. In a way, I was because I thought that request was far too extreme. I ended up leaving for the night and stayed with one of my close friends but didn't tell him what happened. After that incident, my wife and I hardly talked all week unless it related to our son. At the end of the week,

I asked my wife to talk about what happened. She told me again that she wanted to shit on that she told me again she wanted me to shit on her and that it meant a lot to her. I thought it was sickening but she claimed this was her deepest, darkest kink. I couldn't understand how and why my shit excited her, but she insisted that she's always wanted this. We fought about it for a week, and after watching some scat porn and reading articles by people who also shared this kink, I tried to put myself in my wife's shoes.

I told her that I will shit on her if that's what will turn her on. She was so happy, and even though I was still completely nauseated by the desire, I wanted to satisfy her. That brings us to tonight. We were having sex for the first time this week when I regrettably confessed to her that I had to take shit. She perked up with a smile, sensed my discomfort, and began stroking my hair and whispering encouraging things to me.

I still really didn't want to go through with it, but since I had promised her, I pulled out and we ran to the bathroom. She got into the bathtub and I hung my ass over the side of the tub. She got into the bathtub and I hung my ass over the side of the tub. I started pushing, but unsurprisingly found it very difficult to successfully shit on my wife. I turned my head around. I turned my head around to see my wife staring

up and smiling at me, waiting for me to finish. With enough time, I was finally able to get a turd to start coming out. I could hear my wife breathing heavier beneath me as my asshole started to open. However, before the turd was able to drop on her chest, I felt a sensation around my asshole. I turned

and saw my wife, the love of my life, the mother of my son, attempting to catch my turd in her mouth as it fell out of my asshole. I was horrified that she would try to do this and tried to pull the shit back into my body so she couldn't receive it in her mouth. How selfish. Seeing what looked like an attempt by her to eat my shit brought me close to throwing up. As I clenched my butt cheeks together to try and stop the shit from reaching my wife,

the clenching cut off a very small piece of shit, and I heard it land somewhere beneath me. I was too scared and disgusted to look at my wife to see what she'd done with it, so I ran to the other bathroom to clean myself. As I was sitting in the other bathroom thinking about how I will ever be able to look in my wife in the eye again, I heard footsteps approaching. My wife lightly knocked on the door. I didn't respond and was on the verge of throwing up the more i thought about what had just happened she walked away and i got a text from her thanking me for fulfilling her wish

and asked me to come to bed oh shit clicked on the wrong thing i've been sitting in the living room typing this yeah i've been sitting in the living room typing this for the last half hour, scared to face my wife. We have plans to take our son to the zoo with another family tomorrow, but I don't think I can look at her after what she just did. I feel deceived and violated by the woman I love and trust. During our initial conversations about this, there was never a question that my shit would go anywhere other than her chest. She knew how uncomfortable I was with this in the first place yet she still tried to push the boundary that we'd established i would appreciate feedback from any don't care about that so all right let's give some advice to this guy i i there were moments in this where i thought hey what am i gonna say

not everything you do is your favorite thing but she's asking for a lot yeah yeah that's wildly inappropriate especially if you firmly agreed the shit will go no further than the chest and you turn around and see her gobbling on it look i'm disgusted by the whole thing personally but i i'd shit in her mouth you know you're just a good worried that my kind generous lover you know what yeah my wife whatever i don't care who it is but but i but i would i would be like what do you want me to eat today you know like like i got a real hankering for chipotle but i don't think that's gonna make for a fun experience for you here's the thing in my head oatmeal it's like if i poop in your mouth, we need to have a common

understanding that I find your mouth unsexy for several days. What? Oh, come on. Little smart mouth. Look. Smart mouth combined. It's a binaural. What is it? A by what compound? A by

two liquid solution. It allows you to shit in a woman's mouth and do it carefree because it kills all of the oral bacteria that will certainly be breeding perfectly within i hope they appreciate the second read we're doing imagine what her breath smelled well her breath probably smelled like shit yeah that's my thing yeah yeah if i poop in her mouth you got it like i don't want to kiss you after sex. I might not want to kiss you tomorrow. I'm totally on board with that. You're right. Dude, poop is so

fucking gross. Implementing that at all into sex is... It's about the grossest thing. It's revolting. It's the grossest thing. I would prefer... I would drink swamp water first. The thing about blood, though... I was about to say blood play but

like i think i'd rather do poop than blood because there's something about like even being into because there's like harm that comes from that that has to transpire for their blood is less gross but the way that you get it is not okay there's something wrong about the way you get it that we're doing harm and so much harm that we're breaking the skin to acquire the blood. What if it was pig's blood? What if you got it in like IV bags and did blood play? What are we going to do with it exactly? Like roll around in it?

Just spread it around, slip and slide. God, I – That might be better than poop to me. I don't know. It's not for me. No. I don't care for blood very much. I don't want poop on me, okay?

But I will poop on her If I have to Because you're a generous lover I really think that's where it's coming from It absolutely is I really don't want to That's a private thing I don't want you to know when I'm pooping This is one area where I agree with Howard Stern

100% He's like, my wife never knows When and if I shit. I have a private bathroom on the other side of the place. I go there, I do it, and I'm terrified while I'm in there that she might knock on the door and wonder what I'm doing in there. I don't want her to know

that I do shit. I feel like... Oh, I have no problem with that. I'll tell my girlfriend I gotta go take a shit. Well, that's not me. I'm closer to Kyle and Howard on this. It's not that level of secrecy. My wife and I describe it as keeping the magic alive. If there's something

gross about you, I try to keep it from her. Yeah, you don't need to know that. Other people do it differently. If you have a yeast infection, maybe keep that to yourself. Just be like, not today. I don't need to know that there's yeast growing in your vagina and it smells bad today. Just be like,

today's not the day. Okay then, see you later. I'm not going to delve further. You don't want to know? Not even in cute little language like, I feel like I'm opening a brewery down there. No, that would anger me. That would anger you.

We just use some euphemism. You know, like my wife might say, the office is closed for reconstruction. That could mean any number of things, but it means not now. I like shark week as a euphemism. It's shark week. Not happening.

See, the poop thing, like, now, would you ever? Forgive me if I didn't catch it kyle you're talking about being the generous lover willing to shit on them oh no what if they want to poop on you not on your mouth or your chest maybe like they just want to like get one the top of one of your feet with shit your bare feet i'm so opposed to that i'm so opposed to that right because i feel like i know how kinks work right she's gonna poop on my foot and then next week she's gonna be like let's poop on your knee and then the week after that she's gonna

want to fall on my on my chest and then the week after that she's like eat it all chew it open your mouth and show me no don't you close your mouth like it's a slippery slope open your mouth like a sloppy boy yeah you're my sloppy boy yeah yeah you're my sloppy boy eat it up and then the week after that the week after that my my elbows and knees have been could have been tied together with saran wrap so that i can only walk on my my elbows and knees and there's a trough like a pig's trough and i'm wearing a pig mask and i have a pigtail butt plug and there's just a trough of shit. And that she's been saving all week.

She's been refrigerating her poops and eating terribly. So that she could create an entire trough of her feces that I have to eat. And she's pushing my head at it. And she's saying, you're my dirty boy. I'm sorry. You're sloppy boy. I regret that. She's got a little PTSD right there.

I love that. That's so fucking funny. You're my sloppy boy. You're my fucking funny. You're my sloppy boy. You're my sloppy boy. My sloppy little boy. Shovel that shit into your mouth, piggy. Why are you closing your mouth and eating like a gentleman for? You're eating shit.

That was their fetish? That they want to poop on you and then mock you for how dirty you are. And be like, look at you, covered in shit. This whole operation was your idea. This is your shit. I didn't eat kimchi last night. Is this cuttlefish?

Did you eat cuttlefish? Hang on to carry. Yeah, I would have to i would have to really care about the person and already have like a lot of skin in the game already but like if this is a person i've just started dating it's like no that's not for me and it's really never going to be for me and i understand that if that's something that you need to be fulfilled like like this is probably going to work if you want to go find a second boyfriend and all you do with him is shit on him, I'll support that. That's not cuckolding.

That's me dodging literal shit. You go find the dude to shit on, we'll go out, the three of us, and have dinner, and I'll buy all the food and chuckle the whole time. No, no, honey, have some baked beans. He's over there sweating.

Dinner's my treat. We're going to White Castle. She loves those chili cheese fries. Have some more. No, it's all free. White Castle, honestly, it's really shocking how quickly That goes through your body You'll eat it and genuinely

Fucking three hours later You'll go to take a shit and it will smell like A White Castle store How does it go through you that quickly? It's rough, I remember the last time I ate White Castle I specifically remember the shit that happened After it, and it has kept me from Eating White Castle again

I've never had White Castle, but Frosted Mini Wheats do that for me. They say it takes 24 hours to digest something, yet Frosted Mini Wheats, an hour later, it's go time. And I can't, I mean, I need to have like, I need to

plan my day around this. It is predictable and it has to, you can't have Frosted Mini Wheats and go paramotoring. That's a bad plan. Well, you can, but look out. Yeah, look out. Okay, you can do it, but it's a bad plan. What is that, a disabled field trip?

Look out, kids. Bombs away. It raining. What's that, Bobby? Oh, you're my sloppy boy. The birth of a king. And that's how the game got started. It raining. What's that, Bobby? Oh, you're my sloppy boy. The birth of a teen. And that's how he got started.

That's it. She was at her field trip, and some paraman pooped in her mouth when she was a child, and now her husband must shit in her mouth, or she cannot climax. I was watching this show on Netflix a few days ago,

this prison show, where it was like... I've been watching a lot of those list shows recently where it's like 72 most dangerous animals in South America. And I'll be like, yeah, I'll spend a lot of time on this. Okay. And I'll watch dangerous animals. I watched the world's most dangerous prisons. And one of them in honduras had me

cracking up because it was like this couple and i don't know what's what's the term when a guy goes to jail and he starts dressing like a woman is there a term for that i'm trying to think back to oz like if they had a word for i don't remember anyway there's this guy who went to prison and dressed up like a woman. Big, strong guy. Dresses up like a woman. And he's not like the guy who's getting fucked by others. He's kind of a strong guy. And they're going around interviewing everyone.

And they go to this guy's little cell. And he's got his boyfriend or whatever in there. And he's a much smaller man, not dressed as a woman. And they're like doing the interview. You know, they've been making the rounds talking to people like, how do you do to stay safe in this Honduran prison? It seems so dangerous and dirty. What do you do? And most of them are given healthy tips and everything.

And they get to this guy dressed as a woman and her boyfriend or whatever. She's like, the interviewer's like what do you do stay safe here in honduras she's like oh you see it it's very safe here nobody mess with me it uh me and my boyfriend we are so happy here i would never leave even if they let me out i would never leave here i'm so happy i have my friends here it's so uh so very nice yes So he turns to the guy who's smaller, and he has a look of like, this is what he has to do. And he's like, yes, I very much enjoy

the life I am having here in my Honduran prison with my beautiful Honduran prison wife. She, believe it or not, I actually receive. He was like giving a horrified defense as she's like sitting there like big hand big meaty man hand on his shoulder as he's oh yes it is a you you just we a big family here big community here definitely not getting passed around please help me it's to be your favorite thing.

Wise words, Kyle. Oh, that was so funny. I bet he's not having to eat shit. I don't know if I take that bet. And that guy, he's getting action. He's getting dick on the regular. I prefer that relationship with that large man dressed as a woman

than having my wife shit in my mouth every night. You know, I disagree. Would you rather suck a dick or eat a woman's shit? Suck a dick. Doesn't have to finish. She ate poorly, my friend. I'm going to suck a dick

and come dodge. Do you have to suck the whole dick or can you just be like real quick? Oh, that makes a big difference, right? Whether you just take the tip? No, I was meaning, I shouldn't have said whole dick. I was meaning like to completion or no. Yeah.

He needs to finish, but you can be bad at it. You can come dodge. That's my rules. How big of a shit is it? You're going to eat this shit like it's delicious pate. You're going to spread it over the roof of your mouth with your tongue. I don't even like pate that much. Like it over the roof of your mouth with your tongue to not even like pate that much uh yeah like like it's caviar or something you're gonna push it against the roof of your mouth and you know how you when you eat caviar the they burst in your

mouth and release that delicious flavor the corn in her shit is gonna do that all right i'll suck the dick you'll suck that dick that's goddamn right you will i don't know why you were that resistant why i took all that. Yeah. Yeah. I had to go. I needed to know the texture of the piwana, but there we go. Yeah. I'd rather suck a man's dick. A dick is better than any poop.

That's right. Homophobe. Yeah. Yeah, but after it, like, this is toxic masculinity. Yes, Taylor. Hey, this is Steve-O, and this is eat dog shit. Like, at the end, you can be like, dude, that tasted so bad. But, like, if he was like, hey, this is Steve-O,

and this is sucking some guy's dick, like, afterward, he'd probably feel different. Right? He'd feel like he's glad he didn't eat that shit. Yeah, that wasn't so bad, actually. What are you doing later? Yeah. Gotta go skateboarding cool you see how uh how fat bam margera is now he he so i am are you sure it's like real recent because he got fat then he lost a ton of weight and started skating again

and that was the last i heard of him was that he lost weight and was skating no when he was on the stern show one of the weird things about him he wears rings on all of his fingers and they're so tight and he's so fat that they're permanent the skit that they're like he's like the the permanent permanent he can't get them off he should probably have those removed right he's gonna lose all his fingers well like they're he's he's adapted essentially like they're he's he's adapted essentially like they're like if he took them off there'd be indentations where they used to be that would not go away in any sort of timely fashion like they're on there you'd have to fucking saw them off or

something i don't know how you get up they were just he howard was like what is going on with that it's i don't know i just wear them you know i like Yeah, I guess he's not as fat as I thought he was Good for him Yeah, he lost a lot of weight Last I heard, which has been like eight months ago He was getting back into skating Like semi-pro or pro And he'd lost a good bit of the weight

He got real fat He went on a I was going to say when Ryan Dunn died Like it was a rough time for him. Yeah. So he's pro skating? That's what he started out as. Yeah, that's how he got famous.

I think I'm thinking of his dad, who was always super fat. Yeah, that's right. He did start off as a... Phil. You remember Don Vito, who was a part of Jackass for a while, and then it turned out he was like diddling kids and then he just got like wiped from the universe i'm glad you know that yeah yeah yeah don vito like he was the lazy eye guy and as i said he got caught diddling kids

let me see i think he's like he went to real deal prison don vito diddling i always want to know that they're extra guilty. Right? Like these diddling kids and they lock them up. Fantastic. I still have this weird fear that all he did is like he was a 4chan like old fag or something. And in his browser cache was things he never meant to download. I don't even go to 4chan if people think I'm projecting.

But I want to know that these guys are really guilty. Yeah. That's only me who thinks that. Yeah, who thinks that You always want to make sure people are fully guilty I guess it doesn't matter now Because I just went to his wiki page And he died in 2015 Who saw that coming though? He looked great You know what this guy looks like, right?

Yeah, he's roly-poly. Yeah, like one of the ugliest people on Earth. Well, was one of the ugliest people on Earth. Don Vito? Yeah. He was disgusting. He was disgusting. How's Wings doing?

What's new with him? Oh, I could be wrong about this. So let me add that little disclaimer. But I want to say he extorted Liquid Richard into giving him like $17 of the money that Liquid Richard has made from making the songs. $17? Yeah.

Huh. Yeah. Why? $17. One seven. Yeah. And I had so many people I saw saying like, I support Liquid Richard because I like the song parodies, not because I want to feel Wings of Redemption's chilly habit.

And this is not fact. This is like TMZ speculation you're having. I'm 90% sure that's what happened. How did he get – how did he extort $17 out of it? So did Wings extort Liquid Richard. $17 out of it. So did Wings store Liquid Richard? I think Liquid Richard's channel went down over some sort of copyright thing, and maybe

Wings was going to take the pressure off somehow if he gave him the money or something. Some kind of a conversation between them got released. Some sort of Skype screenshots of him giving him $17 or something. Wings should have learned the first time that his private Skype conversation got released yeah i i don't know i i saw that liquid richard channel

got taken down maybe five or six days ago and i think i think maybe there was a new channel i don't follow this stuff too closely uh you know but i i know a lot of people who do and then a lot of people who like the songs and and purchase them on itunes or whatever or somehow they contribute to liquid richard's patreon or some shit i don't know uh other than that uh obviously his channel got suspended for a week for um for threatening to dox those people or that guy um is that week pass? I think it might be. Maybe it's today or tomorrow. It should be getting close to being past, you would think. So the big return will be soon?

Extra large return, yeah. Less and less. I haven't seen him in the last couple... It's probably been a month since I've checked him out. He's shrinking. I suppose so. We have no idea what he weighs. I would guess somewhere between 350 and I would guess 350, 340, maybe.

I don't know. A normal person would be in the 200s by now, but it's him. I wish he and Boogie had done like a race or something. The turtle versus... The tortoise versus the tortoise. Jesus Christ. But like any kind of competition incentivizes you to do better.

Not if you're both slow and steady. Yeah, the trick is to be slower and steadier than my opponent. Slow and steady does not always win the race. That is a misnomer. Actually, quite often, fast people win races. Yeah, Usain Bolt.

Arrest. In all those other famous runners, we know. There's a reason the hair was the favorite. I watched that clip the other day, and the hair won the race. He just kept going to the finish line and coming back and mocking. It wasn't that slow and steady won the race. It was that fast and arrogant won the race he just kept going to the finish line and coming back and mocking the it wasn't that slow and steady won the race it was that fast and arrogant loses the race i saw that clip the other day of the female runner who won the marathon or whatever and she takes a shit mid-run you ever seen that clip oh yeah so when you run you do those extreme

like aerobic like long-term marathon type exercises you often have to take a shit like it's just a biological thing and so i've seen specifically women i've never seen a man do it shit themselves and just let it let it run down their legs and so you'd look and like their thighs are coated in like diarrhea as they run i have seen pictures like that yeah i've seen men do that too yeah this woman stops pulls her pant they're essentially panties, like running shorts. And just shit right there. And this is like a four-second shit. It's like, and then panties back on and back into the race. And she's right next to people on the sidelines.

And they're just like, what the fuck? This is my position. This is my seat. I got here early in the morning for this my child has to smell that what did you eat madam we brought a blanket and a stroller to have this spot and watch the racers and the reddit uh thread said like you know whatever name is like maria chesloca like peas during a race and all the comments are like that ain't pee bro take a closer look and but but then you got like this whole like argument amongst the commenters where someone's like hey when if a man had stopped to pee it would have been fine and then someone's like

she just shit in the street it's not fine for anyone to do that we don't even let dogs do that was it in front of people oh yeah so many men can't do that no one can do that we don't even let dogs do that was it in front of people oh yeah so many men can't do that no one can do that dogs can't do that someone has to be there to pick it up when a dog does it and then people are still like he's gonna pick it up right all right good he picked it up good good otherwise i was gonna shame him and throw it into his car she just shits and runs with no she doesn't even like kick a little She's got things to do She won the race She had a girl, we're proud of her Although it seems like cheating

Because she dropped some weight Like mid race I don't know, if everyone was allowed to shit Who knows what would have happened That'd be funnier if they had Shitting in other sports Like a guy rounding third. He's like, and Martinez rounding third, drops a present off for that coach,

and now he's headed home. And it's just shitting down his leg. Third baseman's like, goddammit, there's four more innings. That happened to, like, Roberto Luongo, a goalie in the NHL, like years and years ago in the playoffs, where, like, he was in the playoff game like there and then just out of nowhere he just goes oh and just starts skating towards the bench like something going on with luongo here and they like the backup had to rush in turns out he was about

he like shit his pants and had to had to get in there so the most embarrassing didn't see any poop though so it didn't count the most embarrassing is the ufc because like you're grappling and you're grappling with the person like like it's not like you know for playing baseball and the third baseman shits himself shortstop just takes a couple more steps into the outfield right you just play deep if if if you're playing basketball someone shits on the court well you've seen those fellas that run out with the big wide brooms you know they get it right up you've seen those fellas that run out with the big wide brooms. You know, they get it right up. You've seen the ice girls in the NHL. I'm sure they could handle a deuce. But you shit in the UFC, and it's on a canvas mat,

and there's a guy, like, all over you. It took 15 years for that to be a disqualification. Really? Yes. Jesus Christ. Here's why it's more common than you might have guessed over that period of time because some guys would take diuretics to help them cut the weight so then they like even the next night would have some residual effects of all the diuretics that they sort of od

overdid i should say and uh so yeah yeah they're they're in the next fight with a loose stool uh is there a video other i think we watched that one of the women who pooped. There's a woman who pooped. Yul Romero I think did it. I think Tim Sylvia pooped himself once. I've only seen the clip you guys showed of the woman. I haven't seen any of the male poops. Yeah. Which is the funniest, or I guess

the worst. I think Yul Romero's is the worst. Yul Romero shit himself. He had these very tight purple shorts on, if I recall. And it was just... What's his first name? Yole? Y-O-L.

Okay. I pronounced it that way so he knows how to spell it. Y-O-L. I think that's how you pronounce it anyway. Who was he fighting? Five UFC fighters who pooped their shorts during a fight. This is a list video?

That's great. I'm showing... Oops, wrong click. I'm showing it to people. There's a GIF. All you really see is that where the poop comes out is a very different color. It's stained. But you see, the fight

continued, and he had the poopy butt, and yeah. You know, what I always think, when I see them in the ring squaring off right before they actually kick the fight off, they're announcing their weights and everything, when I get nervous,

I've got to piss. I will have pissed in real life right before the fight so that I'm ready for the fight to watch it so I don't have to take a bathroom break. And I'm like, ah, I've got to piss again. I don't want to miss any of this fight. And I'm thinking like, what if I were the fighter? Yeah. I'm like you.

I've done stuff like I used to do off-roading. And the way off-roading works, you kind of drive through the woods leisurely. And then there's the obstacle. And that's the show. And I have been like, I better pee down here so i don't do it on that you know like let's let's empty the tank here so i'm not pissing myself on the way up i'm scared yeah but like how do you like i've never seen a ufc fighter do it like like either piss in their corner with some towels or like return to like the innards of the arena.

But I got to imagine that it's happened where they're like, I really got to piss. I don't want to fucking... Yoel Romero's out there. He just relieved himself. I can smell it from here, but I really got to pee. I'm not into that.

Maybe you shut down in this sport. Maybe Yoel's into that. Maybe that's his king. Ah, yeah, and he's just so fucking dominant. Go ahead, I like it, poopy. He's like, you know what? Tonight, I'm going to kick this guy's ass and shit all over him, and there's nothing he can do about it.

Oh, god damn. Can you imagine getting into like a north-south with a guy who'd shit himself? Kyle, which UFC champion do you think is least likely to be champion at the end of the year? I think Rose has a tough fight ahead of her going down into Brazil. I'm a little afraid for her. I think Tyron might get stripped if he doesn't do what Daddy Dana wants him to do. I think Henry Cejudo. Are they fighting for henry's belt he and tj uh yes there is a tj there is a thing that if one of them misses weight they fight for tj's belt

um it's not like official but that's been pitched yeah that makes sense um yeah i i think that he's going to lose his belt to TJ. Okay. So I think he's the most likely. But then the others are, there's a possibility that Tyron gets stripped because Dana hates Tyron. And if Tyron doesn't walk his line, Dana's fine cutting him, I would imagine. And I feel like Rose does have a tough fight going down into Brazil. You know, however many thousands of fans that despise her. And, you know, I don't know how, if the judges are Brazilian when you do that

sort of thing, but like that could come into play. Yeah. I don't know how it works. Um, so I worry for her going there and doing that. And, uh, I don't think John's going to lose against this, that Anthony guy. I think that's just an easy win for John. I don't think that Cormier is going to lose to anyone. I think he's going to rematch with Stipe. That's probably the most likely outcome because it seems like Brock doesn't want to play. And Max isn't going to lose to anybody at 145. Habib doesn't have a challenger coming up that's worthy of him anytime

soon it would seem. I think that's it. I think Nunez is holding on to her shit. It'll be a long time. If there is a rematch, it'll probably be late in the year. I don't think that Dana wants to do the Cyborg-Nunez rematch.

I know Holly wants to fight Nunez. Holly Holm. Poor Holly. She's lost so many to do the Cyborg Nunez rematch. I know Holly wants to fight Nunez. Holly Holm. Poor Holly. She's lost so many of her recent fights, and she's just one of those, she's in that same position like Janjacek, where she's like the second best or third best in her division, and to fight someone below her is just overkill,

and to fight someone above her is almost a guaranteed loss. I'm not convinced Janjacek isn't better than rose now like i know rose beat her twice so you say hey rose is better but if i'm talking about being able to defend a belt jan jay check to beat all comers except rose rose lost to is esperanza esperosa the cookie monster um rose lost to somebody else too it feels like rose can beat john jaycheck and not a lot of other girls which is why i think she might lose her belt potential uh yeah matchups are a big thing right like like there's a rock paper scissors kind of thing just because rock beat scissors took me a while on that doesn't mean rock can also be paper even though scissors can

be there's a paper out there um i i wonder that about i wonder that about habib too i i think that habib is a terrible matchup for connor but i think tony might be able to handle him i want that fight i that the fucking ali max is too little i know max holly's huge i know but he's not as big as tony i don't think i I know Max walks around at like 185 or something, but Tony's probably walking around at 195. I just think he's a... I want to see Tony fight. Tony's the champion anyway.

Tony's a fucking champion anyway. He lost his belt to an extension cord, god damn it. Tony's the champion of that division, and I love Conor, but Tony's the champion of that division. There's a lot of ways you can lose a belt, and apparently wearing sunglasses indoors is one of them. He wasn't wearing them. That wasn't true.

Oh, I heard it was true. No, exactly. That's the fucking... I bet he hates that. There's a lot of people that think it's true. He's like, I wasn't wearing them. People don't know, Tony Ferguson wears sunglasses indoors a lot, and he hurt himself badly tripping over an extension cord. And I guess, i don't know i

heard it was confirmed that he was wearing sunglasses indoors and uh they oh i also heard that like dc tripped over that same quarter chael sonnen or something like but it wasn't hurt yeah but that if i don't know if you guys probably most listeners haven't been on like a set where recording happens but there are people who like professionally make cords safe to walk over and there are tools that do it in a jiffy and i've seen the late night commercial where you like take that role and it's like if you need to lay down cord this will do it in a cinch and you lay the whole thing and i'm like god i have no use for that but i won't they use them in hollywood a lot if it's the same thing i'm talking about and uh yeah they didn't make the place safe and ferguson got hurt

and it changes and it was he was he was there for a media obligation he was working for the ufc in being there doing something that they were having him do he gets injured working for them and they take his belt away and they let somebody else go fight for it. Two people who aren't even in the top three go fight for it. It was absurd. Was it Khabib versus Iaquinta? Iaquinta. And look, both good fighters.

We definitely saw Ray Janal put up an incredible performance the other night, and Khabib certainly had a good time against Conor for the most part. But at the time, it was bullshit. And I still say bullshit because Tony is the champion of that division. Conor didn't defend his belt for over a year, so you lose your belt. Tony steps in and he fights Kevin Lee, even though Kevin Lee had a staph infection and looked like shit. But he won the fight. And Tony was the number two guy.

He was the best fighter in that division that was available to fight. And he fought like number four or five or something, whatever Kevin Lee was at that time. You know what else was bullshit? A lot of people don't know this. Michael Chessia was the next highest rated guy on the card. But they had to skip over him and give Al Aliquinta a title shot because Chessie had got glass in his eye from the Conor McGregor dolly thing.

Isn't it Chiesa? It could be. It's spelled with a C-H. Yeah. I think it's C-H-I-E-S-I-A. Chiesa. That's Chiesa, not Ch, like church. Oh, if it's like a Spanish name, it's Chiesa.

He's not Queso. He's not Spanish. He's a white dude, but I think it's Chiesa he's not Queso he's not Spanish he's a white dude but I think it's Chiesa it doesn't matter fuck it he would have had a title shot against Khabib so good luck with that but he really feels like he was robbed of a title shot from the Dali incident

that's kind of a big deal so he's suing Connor yeah we'll see how that goes. We will, yeah. I don't know. If I'm on the jury, I think he's got a good case. He would have made... I mean, he might have got a million dollars for that fight

instead of the 200 grand he got. Yeah, but he doesn't want a million. He wants every dollar that Conor has made since then, including his liquor money. That seems excessive. But if he gets a million. He wants 50 million, not a million. Does he really?

Yeah. You're fully confident? Because I hadn't heard that. Oh, well that seems like a lot. Yeah. Oh, I'm going to crash my face. You owe me 50 million dollars, Connor. In his eyeball.

No, that was Ray Borg. Borg got his eyeball. Chiesa got it on his his face a lot of people got cut that night all right connor connor look you want to talk about all time greatest of all times connor steps in and he takes out multiple top contenders in one night i have not seen a better dolly thrower in all of UFC history. He makes the woman's champion cry. He takes Kiesa out. He takes Borg out. He makes Habib hide. I mean, four for four.

Wait, when did he make the woman's champion cry? She did. She literally got like PTSD from the bus attack. When he hit the bus with a dolly. Oh, okay. Yeah, she cried. That's pretty funny. She's actually, she's champion.

I don't want to call her emotionally weak But she's very emotional She gets in her head sometimes If there's not any more UFC thing To discuss I have something where I finally Finally Watched a superhero movie I watched Infinity Wars

That was good That's the newest one right? Yes I watched Infinity Wars. That was good. That's the newest one, right? Yes. Yes. So I didn't want to watch the dozens of movies I've missed in the middle between Iron Man 1 and this. And so I decided, like, yeah, everybody was like, you can watch this and you'll get it just fine. And so I jumped in and I watched it.

You're clever enough to watch a superhero movie, Taylor. i have faith in you i'd like to think so uh and it was better than i thought it would be it was it was entertaining there were some it was it was too long usually i don't give that critique about movies but it was too long and i didn't know a lot of who the characters were, but I did my stack ranking of characters that I liked. Number one was, what the fuck is his name? Batista? Yeah, yeah. Batista, the guy with the red lines all over him. He's a stitch. He's blue.

He's hilarious. All the Guardians of the Galaxy scenes I liked the most because I like Chris Pratt a lot. I thought he was funny, and I liked the little raccoon guy. I didn't like, I've seen Guardians of the Galaxy scenes I liked the most because I like Chris Pratt a lot. I thought he was funny and I liked the little raccoon guy. I've seen Guardians of the Galaxy once, so I know who Groot was and that kind of gang. I didn't like little Groot. He seemed not that funny and a little

sarcastic. I didn't care for him. I wish he'd die too. Or they'd just replant the original Groot ideally. Unless that's what this is, in which case I'm wrong. He is Groot's kid. He is Groot's kid he is he is groot's kid um i didn't know uh like i i didn't understand when they like he's going around stealing time or stealing crystals for his uh for thanos's glove josh brolin he he was he played that really well

i thought thanos was really badass he was a lot of people say that. I feel like a computer played that, and I don't get why Josh Brolin gets so much... I could hear his voice and his intonations on different words and things with that. It's just like Andy Serkis gets all that praise for his work as

Schmeagle and Gollum and all the other characters he's played in the Planet of the Apes movies and all that. When I'm in the minority, I don't take the position too strongly. I just feel like when someone's that CGI'd, they should get half credit for what happened with their character. But whatever, I could be wrong.

Yeah, you could also make the argument they get more credit because they don't have the natural tools at their disposal for facial... They probably have to really augment their face maybe or i don't know technology is probably better i don't know i don't know what the fuck i'm talking about but what's new okay so so you like anyway uh i liked it i liked thanos uh i need help with a couple things go on why why couldn't uh i guess i'm watching it i'm like why the fuck

is dr who so afraid of thanos when or, why the fuck is Dr. Who so afraid of Thanos? Or Dr. Strange, whatever the fuck. Yeah, Dr. Strange so afraid of Thanos. Like because he has the time jam. Right. And he could just pause time, find Thanos, take his gems. Problem solved. As long as you have the time jam. It seems like you kind of found a loophole in the whole system right did he have the time gem yeah because he like uh like in the beginning i liked uh the asian guy with shield hands he was pretty cool uh but that they clearly had time control and so what is thanos like outside of the realm of time so you you can't you can't pin him down i'm only guessing

that i didn't think of that this is to me a little like lord of the rings and the eagles like oh yeah that's see but the eagles see when people present the eagles thing to me it's like yeah they couldn't just fly in sauron and the nazgul would have destroyed them immediately those eagles don't stand a fucking chance against nazgul with sauron at full strength there and And also the eagles are their own species. They're not a taxi service for you to drive around. They're kind of in the ether, kind of out there. Well, they were a taxi service leader

in the movie, it seemed. They were later. Have you ever seen... Why have they easily been found flying on eagles when they weren't easily found walking across? I'm not saying this is a good explanation. I'm just saying there is an explanation. Have you ever seen the Whitest Kids You know sketch where they discuss this yes yeah that's a really fun one essentially they have this part where like it's the end of lord of the rings and

gandalf it gandalf it's a sketch show and gandalf is like um you know we got it all done and everything's fine then someone goes why didn't you just have the eagle immediately take the ring there he's like oh well then we wouldn't have all had this wonderful experience right and proto's like i lost a finger and like and someone's someone's like barbier is dead and and and so and then and then they were like get that old wizardy bitch and they ought to start beating the shit out of him and then like a credit scrolls or whatever you call it when like there's narration with text

start scrolling and then they formed a new holiday known as Gandalf raping day but they raped him 364 days of the year they would rape him and rape him without mercy, rape and

rape and more rape and then on Gandalf raping day they'd nurse him back to health only to begin raping him anew on the following day and year after year went by for an entire age until one naughty hobbit made the mistake of raping gandalf on gandalf raping day and killed gandalf and everyone laughed and

laughed and it's just like dear god why does kid you know i had a lot of funny bits taylor i don't know the answer to the Time Stone thing. What you might not know is in Doctor Strange's own movie, he was up against a person, I forget, who was much more powerful than Doctor Strange. And what he did is he just kept losing and replaying it again and again and again and again until the guy got bored of it and decided that this was a fruitless effort.

Like, yeah, I can beat you, but I have to keep doing it. I'm not making any progress. Oh, that was another thing with Doctorless effort you know like yeah i can beat you but i have to keep doing it i'm not making any progress oh that was another thing with dr strange i didn't like is like when he was sitting there and and they're all like what are you doing and he's like i'm i'm seeing every reality and he's like i checked four million realities and they're like how many do we win in and i was like please don't say one that's so lame that's so fucking lame like i was hoping he'd say out of four million only 64 and he'd be like oh shit that's like so little as to me like statistically zero or whatever but he goes one and it's like oh that's so lame come on like like i know it's a superhero movie oh another thing so

like thanos when he gets all the the gems and the power crystals and everything he's he's like god he's like boom i'm god and he has like complete control over matter reality everything right like he could time vision souls why doesn't he just make the universe twice as big and everybody will settle down? Because the actual backstory is that he wants to get in good with death, who is embodied by a woman. And he thinks that by killing half of the universe, he'll get a fucker.

See, that's all I need. But instead, she fucks Deadpool. Wow. I was watching this whole movie. I think that's kind of funny. But instead she fucks Deadpool. Wow. Ah. I was watching this whole movie. I think that's kind of funny. I was live tweeting this movie. As I was watching I was live tweeting it to people and they were like tongue in cheek making fun of me for how little I knew.

And at one point I was like is Wolverine not even in this? I thought I was going to see some X-Men. Did you really? That's the universe. They just don't have the right corporate structure. See, Marvel was...

So I was right! There could have been X-Men. Well, there can't be because Marvel was going bankrupt in the early 90s and they sold the X-Men. Oh yeah, they existed in the Marvel universe. And people are like, no, he i said wolverine could be here and people are like no he could be there he could be there and he and he would have been like there's plenty of times

where wolverine and the x-men team up with the avengers and the fantastic four like all of them are together like fantastic four x-men avengers um defenders like everybody's getting in on on on stuff in some of the stories yeah i loved seeing uh the hulk get his shit pushed in by josh brolin uh by thanos early on that was pretty cool there's a fan theory that wasn't the hulk the fan theory is that uh loki like loki can look like someone else he's a trickster and then it was actually loki who got his ass kicked because the it's kind of weird the hulk doesn't lose 1v1 fistfights that's like his thing he just keeps getting angrier until he wins angrier stronger angrier stronger and then he eventually wins he doesn't lose one of you once that's otherwise he wouldn't be the hulk like that's like i thought that was like a demonstration of thanos's power is like oh our 1v1 guy doesn't

even beat him fuck like right deep shit and that's how i interpreted it until the internet got a hold of me and it still may be that we'll see i think i think they'll answer that question in the next movie yeah spider-man was very likable as a character like how he kept like he played that really well like he kept wanting to get involved and iron man would like shoot a fucking parachute on him and send him back to school or whatever willie mr stark thanks for the suit you should see him in uh in civil war spider-man's super likable like he's always talking while he's fighting the other superheroes he's like you know there's usually not this much chit chat it would be like the guy he's fighting he's like i'm a really big fan of yours sorry about this yeah yeah i liked uh thanos's henchman that skinny guy who like just like he's not even the the main man

on thanos's ship and he still comes down and is like humiliating the a team like by himself yeah there's a scene where uh whatever david banner i forget the actor's name mark ruffalo can't hulk out he's like you're embarrassing me in front of the wizards it was really good line yeah yeah yeah it was better than i thought so maybe i'll uh i'll watch the next one or what's the one right prior to uh infinity wars it'd be the civil war you say i'm wrong people told me to watch uh they told me I should make my next one Logan. Because apparently Logan is good. So Logan is apart from this entire universe.

Logan is essentially an alternate reality, an alternate telling of everything you've seen. It sort of discredits every other X-Men movie and makes them out to be like comic book stories written by Cyclops. And essentially Cyclops is propaganda, because in all of the comics, Cyclops is the leader. But he wasn't the leader. He was never the leader. That's not how it actually went down. So Logan is like a mix between a Western and a comic book movie. It takes place in the West. It's in the future.

The thing about Wolverine is that he's got this healing factor, but because he's got this adamantium, this metal coating all of his skeleton, it's constantly killing him. It's a deadly metal. It's constantly killing him and taxing his ability to heal.

So that is what ages him. Without the adamantium, he'd live forever, essentially, but because he does have the adamantium he's got a limited age uh lifespan and so by the when logan picks up he's breaking down he's he's old man logan as he's known and he's still the same actor yeah yeah it's his final portrayal of the character like his claws don't really want to come out they make like an erectile dysfunction joke about that at one point and um it like charles xavier is uh is there but he's super old of course and sort of has dementia and his powers are sort of not failing him but sometimes though kyle tell me if i have this wrong because i have it different than you and kyle's good at this so i'm not that confident but i

thought the scoop was they like cured or unmuted, unmutated all the mutants. And because Wolverine had this super healing factor, he didn't get fully unmutated. And that's why he aged. Um, no, they didn't unmutate the, uh,

the mutants in this story. Uh, they stopped new beatens from being born, uh, by, by using the, uh, the corn syrup,

uh, some sort of additive that's in all of the corn syrup products. That's why, if you look, there's a few scenes where obviously there's the corn farmer's house, where he's being bullied by the corporate corn people, right? That's a little bit of thing in the background that was happening there, where they wanted his farm, they wanted him to grow their kind of corn, because it's the kind of corn that gets rid of mutants, it prevents mutants from happening. And it's not necessarily, I think,

that all the mutants are dead. There can't be any more mutants. They got cured. I'm looking for a better word than cured, but it works. They got cured. They got killed. And I want to say they got killed by Xavier.

His powers went... Something happened with his powers where he killed a lot of mutants. Or it could be a spinoff of the House of M storyline where Scarlet Witch literally just says, no more mutants. But I don't think that's the case. That's a whole different storyline that's also an alternate path that's taken. But it's a good movie, and you don't need to know any of this horse shit that I'm talking about, Taylor. It's really good.

There's a little kid in it, and just like child actors a lot she's very good she's likable she has charisma and she's essentially wolverine it's not big spoiler here but she's wolverine's daughter um who was like created by someone else using his dna and uh it's really fun to see them like tag team together and like i try to have adamantium no she's got bone um like just like he did when he was when he was first before they put the adamantium on him with the with the x project or whatever can they remove the adamantium from him so he can live forever it's been it's happened a couple times in the comics but it's a very painful process and it kind of rips him apart when it happens yeah but he gets to live forever right

well he doesn't want to live forever. Oh. He would prefer to die. Like, he carries around an adamantium bullet because he's considering suicide because his existence is pain. That's a deep movie. Well, this sounds like a pretty good movie. I'll check that one out. Is it on Netflix or anything?

I don't know. It's totally worth it. I'll check after this. Very good. You don't need any of the backstory. Like, it sort of retcons a lot of X-Men movies in its own way. So, like, you don't need any backstory whatsoever. It stands on itscons a lot of X-Men movies in its own way. You don't need any backstory whatsoever. It stands on its own.

There's a black and white version that I prefer, but if you don't like black and white movies, just watch it in color. I'll just watch the regular version. Very bloody, very gory. It's R-rated, so you get some good shit. People getting eviscerated, ripped apart.

He hulks out a couple times in the movie and just goes just hard fucking core and he's just like running he's sprinting past like super like like super hardcore soldiers with guns and he's just death death death death death death death death and as he is in in full is this the one where he is running around in the Civil War too? No. That one, he is boning him for that one. He jumps in a hole with a nuke. Wait, Civil War? World War II do you mean? Well, that was the Wolverine. I only saw the trailer for that one

so I just remember seeing him fight different eras. Yeah, there's one of the earlier ones where they show some flashbacks of his life and some of the things that he's done. So you get to see him in a couple of wars. What's the lore on Wolverine? How old is he supposed to be? Like 200 or something?

He's Canadian. His name isn't even Logan. His last name's Logan. I can't remember his first name. He's like 5'3", 350 pounds. But I think he was born five three 350 yeah something like that is a strong man well it's the that's because he's made of metal is it that's the metal that adds that way i think he's also a lot of it is he's also beefy as fuck right um but uh but i i i've listened to the entire backstory of his like there's his upbringing

and all that stuff but uh but i can't think of it right now i know that um he was born in like 1898 or something like that so he's like 120 depending on what time you're watching could you uh could you drown wolverine to death because he probably can't swim? Or would his lungs be too healing? I don't know. He'd just float up to the top eventually and cough up the water. He's really hard to kill. I think he's been taken down to a drop of blood and come back from that.

That's Deadpool. They can do that. They have the same thing, right? They call it a healing factor, but there's different levels of healing factor. Deadpool's got the best in the Marvel Universe, it seems. But Wolverine's right up there. Wolverine's been ripped apart and dismembered and stuff.

But if you cut Wolverine's head off, he dies. And if you ever were to get a bullet into his brain, he'd die. But you can cut Deadpool's head off and he's okay. He's okay. He heals kind of slow though like i i thought i always like when i watch wolverine healing in the movies he comes back in a hurry like you shoot him and while you're fist fighting him that wound heals so yeah it's kind of quick you chop deadpool's arm off three weeks later i'm making the times but like a week later he's got a baby arm he's still coming

back yeah i think some of that's just um you know in the movie for comedic purposes right because they wanted to get that baby arm joke in there they want to get the baby legs joke in there and that sort of thing i think in the comics he heals a bit faster but you know it's it's made up fictional silliness uh but but i think the deal is that deadpool has the best uh healing factor out of all of them and wolverine's kind of in a close second. Because Wolverine can die. And there's a, I've talked about it before, but there's a whole comic book where Wolverine is captured.

And there's this girl with him who has these mental powers where she could free them from their captivity. And he's trying to motivate her. He's like, look, if you don't do this thing that I know you can do and get us out of here, they're going to kill me. And she's like, you can die. And he's like, yeah, there's a lot of ways I can die.

And he starts listing them off one by one. And, uh, and that's a good comic book. She, she comes to her senses and fucking destroys everybody with her, with her powers at the end of that. You know who I've been watching?

You mentioned him on comics explained. Uh, I've been watching milk cookies, FW f milk and cookies for the win i don't think it's actually ftw at the end i think it's like milk cookies fw is he a comic book and analysis no he's a gamer and he plays vermintide too much much better than i do and uh are you still keeping the high level elf around to as your oh i wish i could i wish i could bring her back i uh this guy got really mad at me today like so there are four levels i'm just gonna call them one through four i tried to play level three today because if you beat it

at level three you get better loot you know you kind of need to beat it at level three once or twice for level three to be easier. So I was like, well, I'll just play online and get carried through level three. Turns out I'm pretty heavy. The first couple groups were unable to succeed with me on them. And a group that actually was, the guy got pissed at me. He's like, dude, if you're just going to die, stop taking the potions that heal you. And I'm like, I'm really new.

If that's what you want, I can do that. And I was like, I know my role on this team. I'm hopefully better than nothing. And I think I was better than the computer they might've had otherwise, but certainly wasn't as good as they were. And they come in and i see why people buy custom skins and shit now because like there's a prestige to it i saw the dwarf he's not even wearing clothes he just all tatted the fuck up and i'm like dude that guy i i'm looking for big things out of you

tatted up dwarf you know he's he's he's a berserker does he have red hair i think he had a helmet on i don't remember for sure i think yeah those guys are in the those guys are in the game they're they're they're awesome or maybe it's a slayer uh but in the game like they're fucking shirtless with just tattoos and red hair and they got an axe in each hand and they're just that is not the default look that guy earned it or bought it i don't know but uh he doesn't look like colin when he plays an elf uh yeah i meant to say dwarf but yeah i was this was kind of amusing to me that they got so mad at me uh he had a he had a british accent so i didn't even attempt to come back at

him those fuckers will take you down verbally they they're just are you serious? are you serious right now you cock? I just if a British guy starts talking shit to me in a video game I apologize for whatever it is I did that's my next move but I did beat it on legendary and got some better loot so now

a champion I think anyway now I can do better in level 3 oh to answer your question earlier Wings is unsuspended now. He's streaming now. Is that Wings shirtless? Yeah.

What the fuck is this? Oh. Oh. So I didn't see all of it in the preview window. No, I didn't either. That's why you click it and then you see. Is it really wings though? Yeah, I took that picture. Oh, you took this picture.

It's an old picture. Yeah. Did you edit it? No. I didn't make his head a smaller version of his body, which, correct me if I'm wrong here, all right, boys? Doesn't his head look like a turkey i see it oh in this picture yeah like a prepared yeah it looks it looks ready to go in the oven it looks just like a turkey yeah his body looks like a turkey his body actually looks better than i thought it was going to. Well, it was the after Woody.

Like the boobs are... Usually when a guy gets really heavy, they're more floppy. They're more in front. Like they're laying down more. And his chest hair, it's a good pattern, I would argue. You know, it's not just like the around the nipples thing.

It's not as good a pattern. Yeah, you, uh, like the around the nipples thing. It's not as good a pattern. Yeah. You don't just want to be around the nipples thing. Uh, it's not, I just got to down the middle. I, I just kind of,

I would like to see him lose weight and get the skin reduction surgery. That would be, I've said it so many times that skin reduction surgery is, uh, trophy. It's, it's a, it's a privilege that you've earned

for losing weight yeah yeah yeah i hope he gets to it too i hope he and boogie got to get to it yeah i wonder how they're doing i have no idea i just assume they're like even if they fuck up they're still losing like a half pound a day or something. Their stomachs are so small, it seems like it'd be borderline impossible to not lose at least a little bit a day. I gotta drink milkshakes all day. Well, yeah, I would like to believe that they both have more.

They can do it. I mean, I know he likes his Wendy's chilies. Have you tried the Frosty? That chocolate Frosty is delicious. You can get whipped cream and a cherry if you want. I don't like their frosties, and I think they're made from potatoes. They're delicious. I don't care if it's potato ice cream.

It's delicious. The chocolate frosty. Big fan. What is wrong with potato ice cream? Should it be an Irish accent? No, because they make vodka out of potatoes. Yeah, I think that's what he's going for there. According to Kyle, they make vodka out of potatoes yeah i think that's what he's going for there according to kyle they make vodka out of grapes now still don't believe that

i can get the fucking bottle that's what it says we get the grape and make it and we'll believe you i didn't even hear are you still drinking the siroc or did you switch back to tito's because you didn't like it i'm not always all the way through the siroc i got a 1.75 liter bottle so oh you really went in hard for that one. Yeah. That's like a gallon. The big bottle. I'll grab it. It's a pretty bottle.

It is a good looking bottle. It's the kind that you see on the store shelf and you're like, this would look cool. It's like, I don't know, so many of those I mean, this is probably wrong because I don't know shit about nice liquors but I feel like i don't know so many of those i mean this is probably wrong because i don't know shit about nice liquors but i feel like especially vodka like you're paying for packaging you have to be a lot of those things it winds and the packaging is so good the glass is so thick yeah i mean it seems like it'd be expensive lots of of like whiskeys and stuff. Like they just make novel packaging

and that really does it for them. Yeah, see, it's pretty low. Wow, it's so tall. Like that blue nipple. It's so cold I can barely hang on to it. I keep it in the freezer. I can't even tell how much is in there. Yeah.

Oh, I see now. It's almost empty. We're almost done. You can do it, Kyle. After this, you're back to Tito's, a loyal Tito's consumer. I might try a different thing. It says distilled from fine French grapes. I feel weird even buying alcohol.

Like the cashier's going to judge me or something for being an alcohol drinker. At the liquor store? I get that this is crazy, but this is what happens to me. It's like all these people are like look at this guy this guy's out of control didn't he just buy alcohol last year dude those guys they have like borderline homeless people coming in every morning at 8 a.m when they open to buy like the cheapest vodka imaginable. They see you come in once, I don't know, every blue moon at the absolute

most. I got two years out of my last purchase. I think I have half of that Grand Cala left. Yeah, you still have quite a bit. I should try Fancy Wink. 2020, I'll be right back there. They'll be judging me. Didn't I just see you in 2018?

I'm going to buy like three super fancy ass bottles of scotch and whiskey or something and then drink enough out of each of them that it looks like, oh, this guy, he's a sampler. He knows all that. And then I'm just going to not touch him for a long time and let him sit there. People are going to – in reality, I'm just drinking Bud Light. Here's what you do, Taylor. In reality, I'm just drinking Bud Light. Here's what you do, Taylor.

You can go on eBay and you can buy an empty bottle of Macallan 25 or Macallan, I think there's higher numbers, these $1,000, $1,500 bottles of whiskey. But you've got an empty. So you just fill it with Crown Royal. That's a good idea. Yeah. Now you look super sophisticated. That's just trashy enough that I'll do it. Don't you just use empty glasses like madmen when people don't know what you bought?

Oh, like then they don't know what you bought. If you got a bottle of Macallan 25 there, they know you spent a large amount of money on your boots. I wouldn't know that. That sounds like a car. I'll work my way up. It's a Macallan 25.

It's aged for 25 years What's the 0-60 on a Macallan 25 Yeah It's like a McLaren That's a rock to get me from 0 to 0.08 In about 10 seconds there You guys ready

Yeah Kyle do we have any outros or anything I think everything's covered let me uh let me just make sure uh yeah i think i think i got it all i think it's all done very good well pka 422 good times yeah man