Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #428

Episode Date: March 8, 2019

On this week's PKA, our pal Filthy Robot has made a return, from his frozen wasteland where he's sadly not able to excercise as much as he used to love doing, so we're sad for him and we get into his new life since he moved more on the show. Also the guys watch a video where Ice Poseidon word for words states that his new business venture is exactly what the definition of a Ponzi scheme is, then everyone talks about the recent Joe Rogan Experience with Alex Jones and lastly why not top it off with some politics... some hot India versus Pakistan political drama haha because we like to get keep in geopolitical issues on PKA!

Pinkular Ready, episode 428 with our guest, Filthy Robot, Kyle. Couple of sponsors tonight, Audible, Squarespace, Captera, SmartMouth, and of course, Turo. Turo is the peer-to-peer car sharing marketplace where you can book any car you want, wherever you want, from a community of local hosts. From exotic cars, exotic sports cars, to practical daily drivers, you can choose the best car for you, whatever your budget. Download the Turo app, that's T-U-R-O, on the App Store or Google Play or visit

Turo.com. You can get $25 off your first trip when you sign up for Turo and use promo code PAINKILLER at checkout. Terms apply, of course. They need to hook me up. If they really want some promo, they need to be like, hey, Kyle, here's a $80,000 credit.

You're basically going to drive a Viper forever now and it's your Viper and enjoy it. That would get me on board for sure. That'd get me right on board. You need to take the dick pill approach. Just send you kind of a shitty Viper. Give you a taste for it.

I'd love to see the actual numbers on how many dick pills I sold. Because I bet I sold a mountain of dick pills with my sales pitch. Because it's a wonderful product. Well, I like to think this is a team effort. Yeah, you know what? And to be honest, Taylor's the one that turned me around. When Kyle was pro dick pill, I was like, yeah, but Kyle's pro adventure with regards to drugs so uh but when taylor was like get me in here i was like well huh maybe they had almost won me over yeah almost well

we'll have filthy one over by the end of this yeah by the way filthy wit or you know just now they're on the subject you know you can get viagra and cialis just delivered to your house without going to the doctor now, right? Remind me, is this because they're sponsoring you or because I should actually react to this? You should actually react. They're not even a sponsor tonight. I'm just a huge fan of theirs. I signed up for the maximum. A throbbing fan.

I pay $90 a month. Throbbing. I liked it. I signed up for their maximum plan, so I i don't 18 or 20 how old are you kyle uh 32 is that necessary no it's not necessary kyle has a counter argument for this he says he says you just lack imagination if you can't just even picture if you can't imagine, if you can't fathom a harder cock, right? Just picture your best day, a knuckle-hard cock. That's what it provides.

Better, better. See, you don't need deodorant. You don't need a coat when it's cold out. You don't need penicillin often. Some of these things are kind of needs. You know, but see, I lump them all in. Start low and I get high. That's the grandeur of it.

But, you know, getting your dick harder, you don't need it per se. But it makes life more fun. My whole point is it's very affordable. It's easy. It comes right to your door. And you're going to be a better version of you. It's like creatine. You know, you take creatine when you work out,

so you get the most out of your experience. Have you ever seen that movie where that guy takes the pill? Where did it come from that you thought to yourself, what I really need is my dick to be even harder when I'm aroused? Oh, it's just an independent thought. Well, Kyle sold me initially.

How did he sell you? Give me the sales pitch. Here I am. I'm just minding my own business, happy with my sex life, not at all in the least bit concerned about my so he didn't actually he didn't quite sell me on it because i never bought it you know it was when i got the free shipment of it kyle was like you know you're you're such a fool it makes you so much better you can just marathon sex as

long as you want you know just easy peasy and once i got it i was like holy shit he's right it's not magic where like you're just getting hard for and once i got it i was like holy shit he's right it's not magic where like you're just getting hard for no reason you still have to get aroused obviously it just makes it so that that refractory period doesn't exist like you can just fucking fucking fuck and you're harder than you ever have been before so what you're saying is for an individual who lacks self-control in the bedroom this might be very nice it would be nice in that regard but it's also nice so you're getting a harder and fuller erection than you've ever gotten before more easily more readily i use this qualitatively different for you though yes oh absolutely 100 and quantitatively different for

us quantitatively as far as how much blood is forced in enormous i was gonna i thought you're going with the number of rounds there's an there's a yeah well both there you go we've gone from one to two or three advertising team i use the gasoline i use the gasoline analogy right my car takes 93 octane it's required it's a high compression engine i wouldn't put 87 in it now i could i could just go through life rock an 87 octane like you but i choose not to okay that's him he's calling you out for an inferior unleaded product you're a ford pinto okay i'm a five damn corvette over here we've got to have racing fuel in these things i tell you what and about if you give me another couple months of fucking wisconsin winter by the end of this that will sound like the best idea i've ever heard i'm sure i'll be on board like seriously like next time we do this it'll be like mid-april it'll be like sunny for everyone else

you'll be like i'll be like yeah took you up on that viagra idea it's been great to get me through the whole fucking winter so yeah it'll get rid of uh sad your seasonal affective disorder which i'm sure is kind of rough up there is that one of the other sales pitches too hard for sad no that doesn't help with that at all and i don't like the viagra variant i like the cialis variant that's definitely the the tadalafil that's the way to go hmm yeah so i know uh i know we have something that kyle you wanted to jump into oh my god that you told me about it on pkn before the show and i hadn't seen it at the, but you described it before the show as being, Ice basically comes out and admits,

and just explains his business, but the way he explains it is exactly a Ponzi scheme, like exactly how one works, and as you were telling me, I'm like, okay, I'm sure it's one of those silly clips that's edited a little bit, and it's more like jumping around. No, it's just a straight up clip of someone being like, how's your business work?

And he's like, well, you take it. We can just watch it if you want because he's literally just describing it. Yeah, it's like a 30 second video there. I'm queued up on it. It's remarkable. This is so essentially like to give a tiny bit of background for this clip. He had been explaining how his business works, how his website works, how this new company he's coming up with is going to work and how it's going to be profitable and grow. Everybody starts posting in the chat, that's a Ponzi scheme.

He says, no, no, no, no, no, no. Let me explain. That's where we pick up here. This is the clarification. This is him clarifying that it is not a Ponzi scheme. So this is after he's given it a few moments of thought and has really thought, you know, this is the way I'll differentiate it from a Ponzi scheme. Yes.

Cued up at zero? Yeah. Ready, set, play. In order for the investors to make their money back, what we do is we grow the company to a certain point. And then we have other investors come in and obviously they invest their money as well. Hopefully more than $2 million. then obviously when we get more than two million dollars invested the other investors will get their two mil back it's not a ponzi scheme or a pyramid scheme okay uh i don't really know how to explain it because i didn't explain that very well i guess

um Oh, okay. Well, no, no. It's not a Ponzi scheme. I haven't seen that version. You get initial investors, and then you don't make a product, and you get new investors, and then you use those investments to pay the originals.

And as long as you have an infinite growth potential, you won't get in jail. Is there a product? The version I heard was three minutes long, and there was no mention of a product. No, there's not a product. The only thing that I could tell is a product that he could sell is, okay, maybe he's making a streaming site that he anticipates will have advertising on it,

and so he'd be selling a service there. I don't see a lot of advertisers sprinting to that. Price content? To the Ponzi scheme. Well, what do you know about advertising, Taylor? That's true. It's just like, so I can see how maybe he just explained it badly, but my God, that's exactly the explanation of what a Ponzi scheme is. Yeah, absolutely.

He should not be the front man pitching the way the company works. No, no, no, wait, guys. No, no. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. You misunderstood. Let me, I guess I didn't explain it well. So I'm married to a man. His name is Ted, okay? And we have sex every night. I suck his cock. And yes, we're adopting a small Nigerian boy, okay? We're not gay, though. We're as straight as an arrow, okay? I like how adopting sounds gay has something to do with being gay well i think that's that's the super gay when you're when you're settling down when you have committed a hundred percent to a no it's not gay it's not

gay you misunderstood taylor i didn't explain it well i didn't explain it so when his dick's in my mouth, I'm thinking, this isn't ideal. But here I am. But it's not gay. No, no. No, you aren't thinking that. You're not thinking that at all. You're thinking the exact opposite. You're thinking, this is fucking phenomenal.

This is great. Still not gay. But that's what you think. If we carry that analogy all the way through, you've got to go that route. This guy had his blue chew. Yeah. What's gay would be to be homophobic, right? And scared to

suck dick right what's not gay is actually sucking dick it's really it's gay to not let a trans man have sex with you wait trans woman either i don't know which way i'm trying to say take your pick take your Take your pick, Taylor. Just take your pick. Man, do you know what's not cool? In neither cool nor gay. Nigerians? Have you ever worn like house? It's hot there.

It's literally hot there. That wasn't a black joke. Well, something that is cool and not gay is what celebrities do. And they're like, I want to adopt kids. But I want lots of different flavors of kids. So they'll go around the world and pick a a nigerian and pick a japanese kid and like then pick like a token you know a white kid or hispanic to finish out the troop that's cool when celebrities do that very very accepting and multicultural what's not cool is wearing do you guys ever wear house shoes

around your house like i wear flip flops i'm a barefoot guy like i wear these house shoes sometimes and i used to wear them more often and i always like would forget when my girlfriend bought me house shoes for as one of the christmas gifts this time because i said i wanted some and i'm always like man i always put them on i'm like this why did i ever stop doing this why did i stop wearing house shoes this is so much more comfortable than socks what is a traction you're not it's just like a slipper like a slipper kind of thing let me see the other side oh yeah we would have called those slippers where i grew up yeah just the slippers or how i don't know i always heard of how she's so slippers but man this gets to my point just bringing that up here brings a tangible smell with it

just sitting here in my house shoes. I just need to wash them. I was bouncing my feet up and down because I'm always jittery and moving around on the show. Just the wind current of my heels hitting that soft thing there. You know when there's something that smells bad passively?

Where you go, whew, man. I'm going to put that on a back burner and think about something else. This smells active. How old are they? These? I got them, man. Well, I'm going to put that on a back burner and think about something else. This smells active. How old are they? These, I got them for Christmas. Yeah, that's impressive speed. Yeah. And I think the problem is up until like a week ago, I'd always wear socks in them.

And now I'm just wearing them barefoot. And it smells absolutely vile. Take yourself back to a time where Miami Vice was cool. I went sockless every day, all day, all winter. They were dock siders. They're different than loafers, but similar. You wear boat

shoes with no socks. They were my everyday shoe. I, as a teenager, was forced to leave my shoes on the front porch because my parents were not having it. Did you put baby powder in them? Sometimes, but then that would just create like a level of sludge. Like, really, when you get enough sweat in leather, then that's just the way the leather is going to be.

I did that when I was in high school. I thought you were brilliant. I thought that was a continuation of the ice joke, and you were calling them house shoes instead of slippers to make the distinction between a ponzi stream and what he did a ponzi scheme and what he described i thought you went that far with it i'm like holy shit he stuck that one totally under the radar and then i really know that's that's uh no that's what i was doing no he was struck by the smell of the stink of his shoes and he had no that was the that was a red herring i was doing what he said he's forced to change topics because it invaded his mind nasally.

I had this manager. It smells so fucking bad. It's really almost unbelievable. I can't believe I didn't. Let me give another little tap. Yeah, it's just like a wave. I had this manager who did that. He wore the loafers or whatever with no socks.

I thought he was a cool guy. He was a cool guy. He was like 30. He was, he was very wealthy. He, he, he'd used some of his car sales money to, to buy a chain of GNCs. He had two of them and he was working on a third and he was this really, really fit guy. He had like a Napoleon, one of those Napoleon complex guys. Like he was like five foot seven or something, maybe shorter. So it really drove perfect in every other way. Perfect in every other way, right? Like this is a guy who owned three cell phones because he had so many ladies going on.

Like he was always throwing money around. He made an incredible living. He was very energetic. He was always real bubbly and just popping. And he was a very smart guy. And I was like, ah, that's cool. He's not wearing socks. I'm gonna do that.

I, those shoes, those fucking like dockers, like slip on, like, like business shoe type things started stinking so goddamn badly that like, I remember getting in a test drive once and then being like, ah,

there's something wrong with this one, honey. It's got a smell. And I was like, I was like, we can get that out. Don't worry. I promise you. If you, if you with this one, honey. It's got a smell. And I was like, we can get that out. Don't worry. I promise you. If you buy this one, I guarantee the smell will be gone. Because I won't be in here.

I used to do that same thing Woody was talking about where you're supposed to put baby powder in there to help absorb the stink. When I was like 13 or 14 in the clutches of puberty, smelling horrible like those boat shoes those sparrows were kind of cool now that you mentioned it i was 16 like i had those sparrows that smelled like shit and i remember like i would take them off by the

front door and my mom would be like oh my god taylor that's bad that's horrible you need to get some baby powder or something in there and so so just from then on, I don't know how I thought baby powder was this like magic thing. I would just get home like take baby powder and just like put a ton in there. And then the next day I would just come and I'd put my feet in there with the baby powder in it. And so there was just a congealing sludge of it. And after a while of wearing it like that, it was like layering like those standing kind of formations you'll see in the arizona desert we'll be like look at that that was 30 billion years ago you can look you can take a chisel into my shoe and be like that's baby powder from january yeah i'd take

like a penny and be like oh it's about an eighth inch thick now we should like start over by the end of it people are getting taller it's like well yes pretty quickly but not that quick yeah so that my feet are not not ideal right now have you guys have you ever had that where you're out and about and you smell yourself or smell i've only ever had it with shoes where you're like oh no like this is embarrassing like maybe once or twice i i would forget deodorant like like you know just rushing through your morning routine and somehow the deodorant doesn't make it on. And then, like, suddenly you're like, my armpits feel wet.

That's odd. And you're just like, oh, shit. I'm going home. I'm going home, guys. There's been a big error here. Or this is not going to work. I have to go shower.

Did you guys have those kids in high school that, like, a teacher would have to approach them? High school or middle school? Probably kids in high school that like a teacher would have to approach them high school or middle school probably middle school more like where a teacher would have to approach them and be like hey you smell like you you have to start wearing deodorant you know i remember a teacher said that to us in my seventh grade english class she was like and just another thing boys deodorant is not optional anymore i had a friend it was like oh we must smell terrible in college actually friend of a friend pretty smart guy like in a couple of my classes and he he would come in like this was in north carolina and i'd come in and uh take off a sweatshirt and the room would just like die when he did it he's something it's something mental i don't know what it was that just didn't

want to shower wouldn't do it for whatever reason wouldn't it's cracking me up because taylor has a story of someone who was just so young and not worldly enough yet filthy has a story of someone would you say it might have been mental like some sort of mental disability it must have been like because the guy was i worked with dozens of indians in it so i think i am most familiar with this phenomenon stick the fuck out of the place and it was really a struggle for me because like on one level, I kind of wanted to like almost mentor them. Like this is deodorant. Put this on every day.

It's a mandatory thing. You're not meshing with the culture here. And on the other hand, like especially towards the end of my career, I had kind of like a supervisory managerial type responsibilities. And, you know, you can't fuck around like a pure ken when you're the boss you know when your boss starts giving you deodorant and that that might be inappropriate so i never did anything but that's where the spot i was in maybe you come in early and you've got a lot of those like travel sized like old spies you just put them on every desk no need to be cheap kyle that's why i think it had to be mental because like a lot of people called him out on this and it didn't didn't

change like that just i think culturally it was just for for my guys um acceptable like humans have an odor like that's what humans smell like what do you think humans were supposed to smell like um i don't know cool breeze yeah not like whatever you smell like right now. Wait, Filthy, was this guy an American? He'd grown up in a society of you use deodorant. He had no cultural excuse. No cultural excuse at all. From the area, local guy.

Even that, if you're from fucking New Delhi and you get three weeks in here, you should be like, this population smells really really nice. They should pick up on that and then start using Old Spice or whatever. Endurance smells never have names that mean anything to me. Oh, you mean you don't like to smell like Endurance? That's a great example.

I think Cool Breeze might be what I actually smell like. These aren't things that smell. It's like Michael Scott was like, put that Gatorade in the passenger side cup holder. What flavor is that? Blue. Blue. That's just a color what is it blue blast oh blue blast okay save that save that save that it's a must man it's a must you know i i've had those long-winded like talks on this show where i'm talking to our audience and i'm like look you shower and when you shower you get some soap and you move it around. Okay. You want lots of suds because, because after a while you realize that if there are people out there that really smell this bad, they don't know

this basic stuff. Like no one ever told them this. That's why a lot of times we, we make a big joke of like talking about how to wipe your ass. But in the back of my head, I'm like someone out there just learned how to, how to wipe their ass. ass like like someone just has figured it out and now they don't have like a duty butthole like like they're not walking around seen that debate i've never seen this in real life only on like twitter or weird little internet uh chat rooms or forums where they're like do you know that 40 of people uh sit down to wipe their ass or 40 of people stand up to wipe their ass. And it's like, there's people arguing like, how could somebody possibly stand up? Or like, how would you sit down while you're wiping your ass? Like, I've never, I always just get do the, you know, the left cheek lean or something like it's like a you do like a half, you're still sitting, I'm not standing up over the

toilet. Do you know anybody who does that? Or i need i do i do a hybrid i do a hybrid maneuver you know like like first of all if i am uh having to use toilet paper which which i i don't prefer i i oh you time it before the shower is that the alternative no i'm not saying i go in the shower with a shitty ass like i'm gonna give a preliminary wipe. You just shit on it. You're like, if I do have to use toilet paper, which I generally avoid, do you have a bidet? Yeah, baby wipes or something like that. There's better. We've covered that. Baby wipes are a finishing move.

They're the fatality in Mortal Kombat. I will wipe with regular things and then use one baby wipe as a cleaner or the bidet. Efficiency. So I lean forward. I lean forward on the toilet and get back there or the bidet efficiency so i lean forward you know i lean forward on the toilet and get back there and the day is a finisher woody no no the baby wipe he said oh the bidet is a finisher right but sometimes maybe you stand and you do like a half bow like a quarter bow and and and you know you get back there and you do it like you're bent over

rowing but you're wiping your ass not that's a full that's like a full bow i'm not i'm not good i'm not going into a crunch position from standing or something like that like you're you're so at some point like i'm bending over like i'm doing a deadlift at some point both cheeks leave the toilet and you're standing wiping sometimes leaning posture if i see if it was a real messy situation yeah i always keep a point of of contact just in case there's a there's you know around two or something you get like a ref who calls it you want to be one cheek on at all times you got one cheek down touchdown yeah do you do you wipe sitting down philly or philly filthy yeah i think i think what kyle described is pretty accurate yeah okay i go both ways i am a ambi wiper i suppose you

could say when i was traveling so when i was uh we did my our honeymoon out in singapore and thailand and when we were traveling there they have these standing toilets because it's the cultural thing where they're oh you like a squatting toilets what is this yeah yeah the squatting where they have like they have the two like they have like the and you go into a a uh you know it was an airport this was a singapore airport so it's a huge fucking airport, right? You go in and then they have the normal stalls. Like we're used to, and then they have some, which is like two footprints.

It's almost like someone stood in concrete as it was setting on either side in the hole. And I'm like, man, I feel like I should figure out how to use this, but it's intimidating. I don't want to get my socks dirty. I don't want to fall in the hole. We used to have, we used to have squatty potties at every toilet. And I don't want to fall in the hole. We used to have We used to have

squatty potties in every toilet. And I don't like that. I don't know. Somehow you've got multiple squatty potties. Wait, is a squatty potty that thing that is like a little bench that you put your legs on to make you sit higher? It's like a gyno chair for your toilet.

Yeah. I've seen those. I've never used one. I've heard they're good because according to God's plan, we were supposed to shit squatting. That's right. The Lord wanted us to squat. We spit in his face. Oh, here.

Sloan wasn't a ref after all. It was a priest and he was beginning to write you up in some way. Submitting you to some sort of prayer hell of some sort I imagine. We had a squatty potty at every toilet and it just I don't know. Like I guess we all know what a toilet is for but the fact

that we had a squatty potty at the toilet just seemed to be advertising it too much somehow in my head. I didn't like it. Oh these people have trouble. Yeah right. Was it for other people or for you Woodyody like just the reminder of like oh this is a place we deposit shit it was wait was the was the purchase for me it wasn't no no no it was the reminder like it was i was the one that had the mental problem yeah i was the one who was like

like i don't know like if guests come in and be like, this is a family of squatty potties here. Someone's got an issue. Really? Every toilet? What the fuck is wrong with the Woodworths? That was a conversation I didn't want anyone to have. A friend of mine who went shopping for toilets and was talking about this somewhere

and was mentioning this. And his issue was he had one with a deep enough bowl in the front because he had large enough dick that he didn't want his dick touching the front of his toilet as he was shitting in it and was annoyed with how hard it was to find the appropriate toilet for that i have splash prevention ridges on the side of my toilet for when i'm really powering down also a full evacuation oh well it's marble you know what i really like i i like when you and i don't have one myself but i've gone to like like like i was at a doctor's office the other like like it's actually a hospital and i and i had to shit and they had a one first of all it was the one or one at a timer which i like a lot i'm not an alpha shitter like

taylor i like my privacy um so i had a locking door and everything but the toilet was so high that like there was no bend in my knees essentially like like i i'm i'm well over six feet tall and i'm i'm just like and i'm there like like i felt like it was it was like this chair like like my knees are like hospital uh yeah yeah that makes sense that makes sense that's so old people can get back up easy get back up easier. Get back up. All kinds of people with injuries. Yeah. Now, I've been to people's houses that have really old appliances, like their house was

built in the 70s or something like that, and it's the opposite. You're just down. You're going down into this super low position where your knee is higher than your butt. Your knee is elevated, like Your thighs are going upwards. Those are the ones where you sit down and you feel huge. You just feel like a mountain of a man sitting there on this little toilet. Fee-fi-fo-fum!

I was looking at a house to purchase one time, maybe eight years ago, or something like that, and it was this ridiculous house this guy had built. It was clear that he had aspirations of grandeur. He had built one of those circular things that he had aspirations of grandeur he had built one of those like circular things in his front yard where the cars like do a circle around like a like a fountain and there's a flagpole and uh i get to his bathroom the master bathroom

and he has built a wooden throne around his toilet i'm not like a throne like something i i mean like a fucking disney movie king's throne a big giant wooden chair with the big high back and extra extra wide and that guy rules he rules over his shit like it was i was like well that's gotta go it doesn't seem clean like it's wooden it's soaked up the germs and i like to picture that it had some sort of royal color maybe a purple cushioned back you know it started off brown this used to be white it was awful it was awful i was and i'm there with a real estate agent i'm like well well that's gotta go she's like yeah that's what everyone says i was like

why don't you just get it out of here it's a turnoff i was like i can see a future where it doesn't exist but i'm sure someone less imagination than myself is just like well that's gonna be our life i'm just like i'm not removing it we're waiting for that special buyer did you say you were house shopping or rental shopping like what is this house shopping like uh like six or seven years ago maybe even more like uh uh it was just awful though that that was one of those houses i looked at where it was like this is perfect it's got a bunch of land it's a huge fucking house what's the catch what's the catch and And we discovered in the inspection that it had, it wasn't CPVC. It was some pipe that there had been a class action lawsuit about like in the 70s or 80s. And the time had expired in which it could be repaired for free.

And so I was like, well, let's figure out how much it'll cost. And it was like $30,000 of piping would need to be put in. Walls would be ripped out. And I was like, no. So $30,000 made the house not a good deal anymore? $30,000 made the house not a good deal, especially when you considered at least $5,000 that it would take to remove the throne

and sterilize that room. And there were a few other little things, like the kitchen needed updating. It was going to be like another $65,000. The house was maybe $300,000. It was like, let's just tack another $65,000 or $70,000 onto that.

It's not a $400,000 house. No. Now I'm thinking about the shit thrown. Sure. Very tactless in wood. Not cool. It's gross. What if it was like a literal porcelain thrown?

That's kind of cool. Have you considered iron? Solid. Well, that's also cool. Never know if it's rusting or if it's just splash shit amazing cleaning this i pictured it painted black i literally had the game of thrones thrown in my head

i'm gonna have a tungsten throne made it's gonna weigh 9 000 pounds oh my goodness i wasn't the first to come up with this idea. You were not. The toilet paper roll holder is a sword handle. Jesus. It looks better without the toilet paper roll. It looks better without that goofball sitting on it reading Dothraki. You know, him sitting there is turning me off.

Turning me on. It makes me think that I'm going to look like that on there. Oh, gosh. So the toilet I can't find a price on. But there are decals you can put above your regular toilet for $20, $30. Yeah. And there's a full Iron Throne you can buy for $30,000. Is it on this page?

Yeah. There's legit full-sized Iron Throne that's $30,000. Is it on this page? There's legit full-sized Iron Throne that's $30,000. There's an Iron Throne phone case with just nails sticking out of it. Oh, Royal Toilet Throne. If you scroll down,

you can actually see one made of wood right there. $12,000. That's absurd. Oh, here's one that's a fish bowl i like that the whole back of yeah the whole back of the toilet is a fish bowl uh do you put fish in there i'm guessing so every time you have to flush they have just like a life flash before their eyes moment of like this is the time it's not gonna go back up all jokes aside i like the iron man iron that thing's cool.

It's on the left in the bottom. Oh, I don't see that one yet. I'll have to scroll. Yeah, we're on... This is why I'm broke.com. Oh, I know this site, but I didn't recognize it when you... It's a great site. Like, if you're just, like...

It's a cool business idea. I've thought about doing that, but never got off my ass enough. So, there are... Amazon is looking to grow, right? That's their thing. And they almost don't, profits are secondary. Getting people hooked is primary. They want to be your first thought.

And as a way to do that, these affiliate links, you know, they'll get people, it varies on the item, but between like two and as much as like 12% of the sale can go to you if they follow your link. And sites like thisiswhy i'm broke.com just go to amazon find cool shit and then make like three grand if you buy this thirty thousand dollar throne or you know whatever just moving enough little things at a time you can make a website and have a side business and if it gets popular like we go to um the sweet home are you familiar with that no i the buy it for life subreddit likes this place and they just do lots of reviews you need to buy a movie projector screen a new vacuum cleaner or whatever and they thoroughly go out

review a bunch of vacuum cleaners and you end up following their affiliate link it's what i do is once i found the, I open it back up on my own. That way they don't get their little chunk of the change. I think it follows you for a little bit, though. You just incognito mode. Well, that would do it, yeah. I don't know why you would do that. I don't think you really do.

It's pettiness. It's pettiness. No, it's just pettiness. Pettiness and just being a small person. A very vindictive, deeply miserable person. You know what? Fuck you, 3%. I'm giving it all to these people who make gigantic wall murals.

I can't believe some of the stuff on this site. I'm clicking and it seems like it's made up and then it's real. Like they're selling a full roll of 24 karat gold toilet paper for $1.3 million. Unfortunately, it is sold out. It took me a while, but I found the wooden one you guys were talking about.

I'll show it to the viewers. I mean, it does look classy. It looks like the way a king of old would shit. I think they would just shit in a pot and then some lady would have to come in there. Okay, well, not a king of very, very old. Just old. Were thrones actually toilets? Like, I've been told they

were. It just seemed... No, that's the thing. Yeah, a lot of them worked for the Middle Ages. Yeah. King Henry VIII never left his throne during meeting times he just pooped right there his throne wasn't even a toilet taylor you think you're an alpha shitter you need to meet king henry the eighth that guy'll just shit right in the meeting yeah he was he was hardcore gangas khan he would often he would lift what his ass and you know you can ride traditional

you can ride like a woman he would switch he and he popular ride traditional or you can ride like a woman. He would switch. He popularized sitting on a horse like a woman so he could shit on the go. He said, we must do as the horses do for they are the key to our success. Right, he said that. Because horses shit on the run. This is all, you need to look it up, people.

These are facts and this remains to be true. Can we bring up that podcast, the JRE, the Joe Rogan- I started listening to that a couple hours ago. I'm not even halfway through it yet. And I just like, I was cleaning dishes and doing some things. And I started writing down stuff from the podcast that I thought was funny or interesting. And just over the course of like 90 minutes, I've got pages of funny things. It is, we may as well just quit pka everybody else podcasting you

can stop because we've hit the peak that's the funniest the so far the funniest i hated it i hated it i thought that podcast was shit i powered through it like against my will because i felt like i needed to be up to date on it and one good good thing that I get from it, I got it the last time Alex Jones was on. And this time people fuss at me for interrupting too much. And sometimes that criticism is really valid. Sometimes it's almost a meme and I see them interrupt each other. And it's a reminder, Woody, don't do this to your show because it's ruining it for me. You know, and Alex Jones can't get his thought out and he and eddie bravo interrupting each other constantly joe rogan who usually has a good thought in his head can't get it out and you

know he's got the solution to this argument tries to explain to him that he's just joking with him and that just does it takes like a minute and a half for that to come through the way i see it is almost like he's like joe is knows how entertaining jones is like he's a huge draw like look at all the views in his podcast recently i don't listen to that many i listen i'm listening to this one because it's alex jones and he's hilarious like i feel like rogan is playing him like a loot where he's like oh i'll say this and that'll get you know jones going on another funny rant oh i'll ask a question this way and i'll get him going on another funny rant. Oh, I'll ask a question this way and I'll get him going on another funny tangent. Or, whoa, whoa, whoa, you just said something about

aliens stealing baby parts. Come back to that, please. He was just, I feel like, trying to kind of hem Alex Jones in enough to get him, because it seems like Alex Jones is a billion miles wide and four inches deep. He's got all this stuff, and so he just

Joe's trying to desperately wr all this stuff and so he just joe's trying to desperately wrangle this madman in you know it is so fucking funny all i saw was again and again and again alex jones unable to tell us any kind of story in a straight line unable to make any kind of point randomly scattershotting all kinds of weird conspiracy theories about asians being robots and other weird things backing it up with things like my father had a nuclear power plant under his university and it just goes left and right and never makes any sense and joe would be like whoa whoa let's get back to that one let's deep dive into it though that's it's what taylor just said he's a billion miles wide and four inches deep.

He's got no answers because Joe would stop and be like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Where does it say that? You just said that this is in literature, that this has been written down by people. Show me those books. I need to read them. Well, frankly, I'm not going to get into that right now. But something else to mention is that they are already making half pig, half people, hybrids in China. They've been doing this. Look at 1986, New York Times put it out as a failure to see if people would be okay with this kind of thing for growing these goddamn livers for these drug abuse and political types. They put that out there. People hated it.

They got rid of it. Look it up. MIT's paper. Jamie, Jamie, you pull that up. MIT's paper. And then every once in a while, they'll say something like he pulled up the MIT thing I was like like washing a dish like Alex are you fucking insane the Chinese are not breeding half people half pigs to try and harvest their organs and then like of course that's not exactly true but there is shit going on that MIT

talked about that was like akin to that and it that. That's what he does, though. Holy shit. He takes a little bit of truth, and he warps it into this incredible conspiracy. When electricity and film was becoming a thing, when it was just virgining, they'd make these machines that you could stick your head in and and you could see it and you could see like a little video and stuff and he's like that's virtual reality you see that's alien technology they gave us back then that was

virtual reality technology given to us by the aliens handed down to the vril society which was the nazis they gave baby blood to the aliens in exchange for their technology. They sold their souls, which you've got to keep in mind though. And on this rant, what you got to keep in mind though, is they will only give you evil. Okay. There's two sides. They look like elves and they have horns. They are what we would think of as demons. And if you commune with them, if you allow them in, okay, they will only bring evil now god and the angels they're a whole different thing but you have to ask them to come in okay and they will not involve themselves in your life unless you ask them to get it to to come in what we've got to keep in mind is the

chinese society they're basically robots okay they're not they're not they're built to be a non and you're like what slow the fuck down oh yeah i'm just better than alex jones alex jones would have had four topics in that length of time all of them ridiculous and insane and kyle only had two and they got the late term abortion was a really good example so so they listen to this clip of the virginia governor talking about like super late term abortions and he's like you know there are some kids that are born and they're not viable, they're not compatible with life. So what we do is we take them out,

we keep them comfortable until they die. Like that's how that goes. And that is an awful situation, right? Kids with their hearts born on the outside, with their holes in their skulls and brains exposed and whatever, kids get born that way and they keep them comfortable until they die. Well, they just completely skip over

the non-viable part of this. And they're like, they are taking these children, making them comfortable and killing them as if women want abortions after nine months. Like that's a thing that's going on. And Joe was just like, his mind was blown away that it was happening. He's like, Joe, did you miss the part

where he described the context? He did. And then again, like I watched this and I'm trying to learn to make our show better. I'm like, ah, this must be how frustrated our viewers are when we get our facts wrong. Because that's where I was. I thought it was entertaining. I really like it. He'll talk about, like he said a couple, you hated it?

Kyle, you didn't think it was funny? No, no. You heard me. You heard me. I like the part where like, he'll say stuff that like is pretty agreed upon where he's like and and of all the people in the world the chinese and the germans are the most methodical the most organized and and the most likely to get those kind of projects done that's understood it's it's it's known and that is why the aliens came down targeting those two groups of people and provided them with what

they needed you can see it in 1930 uh early 1930s with the Germans and the Nazis, they received that technology. You can see it now currently with AI in China. And it's like, but I think I stop agreeing there on the Germans and Chinese seem the most organized. Like, you get, like, that does seem, like, they do seem really organized, those groups of people. So most people would be like, okay, okay okay and then he goes so that's why the aliens chose them for this and it's like this is like i i can't tell where his act ends to where he begins like i i don't know like so much of the stuff he's saying is obviously over the top showmanship like fucking obviously like he he said uh oh he's like, oh, you wouldn't believe, I've had a very exciting life. I was in this area of Austin,

this really rich area where all these people live, kind of these elites, these globalists. And I was there, I was 12 years old, and this beautiful woman, 17, she invited me into her home, and she said, I will let you, I will have sex with you if you allow me to put you in full makeup. And so I let her. I let her put me in full makeup, and we have sex with you if you allow me to put you in full makeup. And so I let her.

I let her put me in full makeup, and we had sex. It was great, and as I came back down, her father stopped me and said, that was pretty good, wasn't it? You worship Lucifer with me, and you can have that every day. And I said, hell no, and I got out of there. What? It was like, at no point did you go into a rich girl's house

in a globalist commune in Austin, Texas, and then fuck a 17-year- old whose father then promised her pussy to you if you would but join their lucifer cult like no no that does not like where does that thing out now that you said that look because then he'll say other shit that i'm i would mock these are the kind of places filthy visited for his master's degree that's all i had visited places like that filthy's been to all the eyes wide shut parties oh like all those cool like uh fucking goat heads and stuff yeah oh and then uh so so that was a show but i thought he really was crazy and off the rails by quite a bit i i like i'm watching it and i'm i feel like if he was more like in charge of his own capacities capabilities am i saying this right that he would be able to stay on a topic and flow a little better instead he's just sort of

scatterbraining this stuff and it's yeah he's all over the place he's all over the place he jumps and that's his that's that's his that's the method to his madness right if he were to it like if i'm explaining something to you i'm gonna say well it like this. These people came up with this idea and on this date, this happened. And I can show you, here are the pictures of it. Okay. And here's where some authors wrote about it who were there. Like you're like, okay, foundation formed. Okay. All factual, what you've got there, everything built on this will be real. What he does is he's just like, Oh, and then it was aliens and it was demons and it was interdimensional aliens

actually. And you got to keep in mind Hillary Clinton and, and everybody thinks I hate Donald Trump. I don't hate him, but I don't want to be his defender. And you're just, God, you threw eight things at me that I,

I, I, there's a term for that. It's, it's not gobbledygook. Does anyone know? Gish Gallop. Gish Gallop.

I think, is that Gish Gallop? Yeah. But he but i don't think he's doing it as like an argument it seems like he's just ranting well i when you change topics enough and throw enough people in oh yeah throw enough stuff at people then it becomes hard to debunk them one by one right like it and and filthy has a term for it i i think where it's like 10 times harder to disprove something than to just say a lie. And so he does that nonstop. A lie, a lie, a lie, a lie. Like this gish gallop of lies. And as you follow it,

you don't know what's true and what's not true. Because every so often, one of these things are not a lie. Or he has some sort of evidence for it. And oftentimes, the thing that's not a lie, he'll say it, and I'll be like, bullshit, total nonsense. And then he'll actually be like actually jamie pull up uh in the 80s they tried to use cell towers

to to influence people's behavior and make them more complacent i'm like yeah yeah i bet alex i bet and then like something like that ends up being true there's one about soros oh shit currency manipulator crazy things before this if this one isn't a total lie, what wasn't a total lie in there? But by that point, he said five more things and you're on to the racists. I think it's so fucking entertaining. There's a little bit of truth in almost everything he says. And by truth, I mean... He didn't make it up himself.

No, I mean there's a little bit of truth. Like the real society, right? He didn't make it up himself. He didn't make it... No, I mean, there's a little bit of truth. Like the Vril Society, right? The Nazi demon society where they were trying to... They were based in the occult. That's a real documented thing. That's real. I didn't know that. Now, there's been lots of fiction based around that, right?

That's what Hellboy is. Hellboy is based around that. You can't say that Hellboy is real because there actually was a Vril society. Hellboy is an act of fiction, just like most of what Alex Jones says about the Vril society, right? Using

baby blood in exchange for alien technology. Why would the aliens need to pay us for the baby blood if they have this technology? Baby blood's easy to get, right? We've all got a vial how i stay young yeah oh he was uh i drink it i'm trying to think i'm trying to remember the other really ridiculous things he was saying uh oh this he was talking about how uh uh joe yeah you know how joe like denounced him in a soft way.

And then they kind of, I guess, made up. They were talking about, I think, Alex and Joe talking like, oh, this is what he said. Alex goes, now if they had held a gun to my head and said, you need to kill Joe and his kids, I would say, yeah, sure, I'll do that. And then I would turn

around, grab the gun, and kill them. And then he just kept going because, like, in his own hypothetical where he's like, they were holding the gun to your head, Joe, and then you betrayed me. It's like, what would I have done? What would I have done? I would have agreed with them, said I would have killed your kids, but I'm too quick.

I would have turned around, grabbed it, and killed them. That's what I would have done for you, Joe Rogan. There were a couple parts where he wanted to get physical with Eddie Bravo, and that I really enjoyed. I think you beat up Eddie Bravo. I don't think so. There's a big side to this. Eddie Bravo is a professional.

He is a professional, and I get that jiu-jitsu really gives you another maybe 40% body weight in a fight, but I just feel like Alex is big and strong. I don't know how big Eddie is. Maybe I'm being stupid. Maybe Eddie's 180 pounds. Eddie looks 150 pounds. He looks below average in size. I don't know. He looks like a short, thin guy.

I'm aware that he's an incredibly high-level Jits guy. He trains professionals. He's world-class. Alex is like a big ogre of a man. Alex isn't very tall either he's five nine eddie bravo and 165 according to his wikipedia page yeah that's a little guy he's probably not 165 i'm just sticking that in my own head because i bet he cuts to it so he would have been you know 180 on the show or something well well does he cut does he compete in jits tournaments anymore?

It doesn't matter. He did two years ago. I guess my thought process was just looking at them sitting next to each other. I saw a big wide powerful man and a smaller, more slight build of a man. And despite... Sure, if he were to get Alex's arm

and break it, that's game over. But I don't know if he can break Alex's arm. Alex looks like such an ogre. He just looks thick. He's got this big barrel chest. He doesn't look incredibly fit, but he's definitely powerful. I got the body of a guy who used to lift a lot. He really does.

He looks like he could lay a walloping on you. And then gained 80 pounds. I'm pretty confident that both Joe Rogan and Eddie would win handily. Well, Joe's 200 pounds. Joe's like... He's also short, but he's just... Yeah, 5'7", 5'8", 200 pounds.

Can we watch this funny clip of him screaming at Eddie Bravo? Is this the one we watched on PKN also? Oh, is it? I can find another one. This is the best one. I watched the show. This is the best part.

Okay, let's give it a go then. I'm there. Ready, set, play. I really think there's people out there campaigning for late term abort abortions you think that shit's real you think that shit's real monday to keep it legal who would do that who would do that who would campaign for that that is the craziest thing you can't fucking admit they're

fucking killing already more kids so you're oh we're buffering over here. That sucks. They're telling me it isn't real when they had a fucking vote in the goddamn fucking Senate. That's a conspiracy theory. I am ready to beat your fucking ass. That's a conspiracy theory. You think you're fucking tough? You're about to get it. Bullshit. They're killing already born babies.

Stop fucking lying. God fucking damn it. I'm getting pissed now. Don't get pissed. Go pee. No. I mean, you saw the... Dude, it's going to...

I'm just fucking with you Alex Alex Alex Alex Alex Alex The fucking senate The fucking senate voted to kill babies Out of their fucking barn I was just playing with you of course I believe that Alex

Of course I believe It's all over the news I was just playing with you. You probably didn't hear. I buffered for a bit, so we were behind you. The best clip that's on Twitter right now, I retweeted it, where he's like, Joe, I'm going to level with you about something. I'm kind of retarded.

Yes. Oh, man. So that part was actually funny, but there was a lot of it that I thought didn't work. I'm still only halfway through, so it could peter out and get shitty. It's so off the wall and so much shit going on at once, it's just keeping my attention. Yeah, I watched a bunch of highlight videos.

I watched him talk about Sandy Hook and the aliens and a few other conspiracy theories, 9-11, and all that content's been wonderful. Oh, I haven't got to 9-11 yet. Oh, man, yeah, Tower 7, all that bullshit. Taylor, I have a pretty interesting video here if you want to shift topics. This is a bit of Wings of Redemption content. Alright, give me a sec.

I definitely think this is worth queuing up on. You'll notice, Taylor, you're in the thumbnail. Oh, woohoo! Oh, it's short too. Nice. Yeah, I like this video. I'm ready when you guys are ready. Is everyone queued up? Yep.

Filthy? Yep. Ready, set, play. What's the dumbest thing you've ever purchased? Oh man, I bought a bunch of dumb shit. God, I wasted so much money on dumb shit. Part of the reason people are making fun of me right now because I bought a V6 Mustang because it was in my price range.

Here's my Mustang for everybody who wants to see it. Here it is. Now, what scrapyard did you find yours in? It seems that when people are in car accidents, they shit themselves. Really was shitting? It was shat in, yes. Biohazard cleaning. That's when someone shits themselves in their car.

The biggest regret of my YouTube Twitch career? Not kissing more ass on PK. If I kissed ass on PK, I'd be so square with money right now, it'd be ridiculous. I'd probably be in a brand new Mustang. I'd have just quit YouTube and been living off PK money like most of the guys on PK. Fuck Merca. I don't give a shit about Merca. All Merca did was come in and take all the money I deserve from PK.

That's all Murka does. Like, the only reason to get the V8 is for the sound of it. Like, do I wish I had a V8 sound? Yeah, I do. Sounds incredible. Have you ever driven as dangerously as you do when it's crunch time and you're close to home and you've got to shit? Because all fear of tickets, all rules of the road go out the window. I'm going like 100 miles an hour in a 35.

Yeah, fucking cruising, son. There is no way he's going to book me for going 120 with shit in my pants piled up. I'm going to put an aftermarket stereo system in it, head unit. Am I going to straight pipe the Mustang? No. I'm keeping the stock exhaust on it. Is I'm eventually going to be with the suspension and the brakes? Oh, God. Was that him crying at the end? Yeah, that was him crying at the end.

Oh, my God. I like that at the end i like that a lot i like that a lot he said that the reason oh there's gonna be photoshopped into the new mustang that's so fucking yeah i what i i really want you to get the new mustang if you don't mind what if i do that just fuck all practicality. I just get a new I want you to do it so bad. Oh, I'm so nice. It's plate PK money PK and then just cash So funny Cal of wings on the side of it. He could be riding shotgun in it for you I love that he thinks that the reason that he's not here is because he didn't kiss enough ass.

I mean, you know me. I was about to say, Taylor, did you do a lot of ass kissing around here? No. You haven't been getting your share? It's all me. He'd still be here

if he'd shown up for work no you're trying to boil it down to something that seems simple seems rational but it's not you made a deal you and woody both and now murka it's my understanding has also made the deal with interdimensional demons to keep pka money for yourself and get your own V8 Mustangs and laugh at those with less than you. My throat's getting sore. Oh, man. Good question, though.

At the very least, Taylor, maybe you go on Turo and see if you can... Oh, my God. That would be so amazing. That's so fucking good. I'm writing that down. I'd love a video. I wish we lived close enough so that I could help with the videography, like some low panning angles.

Just that... And then just sort of pan up to you in there. Oh, that would be great. Oh, man. Is this a new video? Yeah, it's like a day old. Golly. Man, Sean Ranklin gets some pretty good views. I don't new video? Yeah, yeah. It's like a day old. Golly.

Man, Sean Ranklin gets some pretty good views. I don't think that's Sean Ranklin. Yeah, that is Sean Ranklin. My bad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's so many great Wings highlight channels. It's hard to keep track. That's incredible. There's a whole sub-genre of YouTubers out there

who are just riding his misery. Yeah, it's like, you know, one of those fish that live on the bottom of sharks? Remora? Yes. Yeah, that's what these channels are like. I like that analogy. There we go.

And Kyle's mentioned before, and it's sunk into my head, Wings is really famous. Much more so than his own channel or the amount of viewers in his live stream would imply wings is known throughout the youtube world if if you put a picture of wings of redemption on reddit tons of people would know who he is he is famous not rich and famous just famous i guarantee i get like you know we do the little experiment in in lobb, like whether it's apex legends or call of duty or pub G,

whatever you just type into the all chat so that all 60 or a hundred players read it. And you're like, Hey, who knows wings of redemption? And you wait three seconds and you're going to see shout out Sean Ranklin's big ups to my fellow finger sniffers, you know,

that was my favorite. Yeah. It was in the MMA thing recently. I forget how it got on the topic of wings but yeah they just you know they do those replies and it was like well you're describing your shout out to your fingers why the fuck you stream that shit like it just goes on and on yeah he's famous he's good branding of uh of streaming what are you on to now filthy Filthy? What's the big game of the day? I'm just aspiring to be wings. That's what I'm aiming for. Just aspiring. But be careful. I'll steal your gig. I'll get really good at Civ. And then all you have to do is sit back and I'll get all that Filthy money. I'll have a bike

that has PKA money on there. All right. You'll be coming from my apartment in oshkosh wisconsin you still have a high-end trick what are you playing uh just i'm doing the variety part of streaming i get the i've played a lot of magic the gathering in the last couple months and i'm kind of looking again uh to move around a little bit see what's out there just i like i like to be able to play what i want to play when it's out there and available and have fun with it that way describe a good game like what do you look for i like a game that kind of keeps me a couple things i like a multiplayer

game if i can get it that's that's that's my preferred one is playing against other people if i can't be playing against other people i want to play against an ai that's hard i want to be challenged by a game and i want it to have enough depth in it that it's something that i can think about so i want to be able to strategize i want to be able to a game and I want it to have enough depth in it that it's something that I can think about. So I want to be able to strategize. I want to be able to play challenging matches. I'd like to have enough replay that I can get into it, get interested and start making guides about it, get immersed in the game. And it's kind of a weird thing because my viewers watch the guide video portions of this. They like it when I break a game down.

But to do that, you have to get good at a game. You have to do that. You need to spend a fair chunk of time and you got to have games that allow you to have that depth of playing them so so yeah yeah i've kind of fallen off magic a bit recently i still i'll still pop in every so often but like i i want to i like playing the tournaments more than the free to play thing but i don't want to buy any gems and i don't want to spend 10 hours playing enough to earn a 2000 coins coins. Let me give you even a worse story. So I just recently played a tournament. It was a Twitch Rivals tournament.

I don't know if you know these ones. So Twitch invites a bunch of streamers to go play a certain game. They do a different game every week style thing. Magic was just one of those. And I just played in one of those tournaments. And I wanted to do a non-meta deck. So I wanted to bring my own deck, not a deck that was just a meta deck that someone had tweaked. So I went and guessed what the meta was going to be and i pretty accurately predicted

what i was gonna be playing against you know what good decks is going to be seeing there a lot and i built a deck that was designed to give me pretty favorable odds versus those decks and then i play tested it all off stream because i didn't want to broadcast the tournament deck i was going to bring and then you know prep for this put a bunch of hours into whatever showed up to the tournament and then because it's magic i got dicked over by rng in the worst possible way if you don't play magic doesn't really need to know to know this but basically you have to draw a mixture of the resource you use to do things and the cards that do things and i just did not get that ratio at all for any of those games played and it's like there's five matches i lost two of the matches straight up to just having to mulligan repeatedly

because i didn't have lands and cards in a mix and i'm like huh and after that i'm like yeah i do remember i'm a variety streamer i think i'm gonna go have a look around see what else is out there right now because fuck that was disappointing like i was excited about that i like magic i like the interaction the tournament play of it i like the fact i'm playing against other people i like you can set and bait traps that it matters how good you are at the game compared to somebody else and then sometimes it just doesn't and that was really disappointing i'm always surprised you're not in the total war total war is so fun man i i i play that seems so up your alley yeah yeah

i never really wrapped my head around the i don't know it's just something about the format of it compared to other rts is just never really the format like the um the scenery the control the yeah yeah and i just never really got into warhammer for uh the 40k stuff or yeah i like the 40k universe but never that particular game total yeah we play uh we play total war 2 um so it's like it's you know swords and shields and and orcs and goblins and yeah i don't mind the time frame that's fine i like warhammer as a universe to play in both the 40k and the regular warhammer both of those are fun universes with a lot of great lore for playing around in but i just never got into that particular game maybe i just need to give it more of a go than i've given it but it's fun if you ever want to play like like um i i've got a couple guys that

play it with me taylor plays it occasionally he's the one that turned me on to it originally and at first it looks like you're setting up a simulator you're like all right i built my army i positioned it this way now go but no it's not that at all there's so much micro there's so much uh like like uh unit knowledge rock paper scissors stuff going on and so much mixing of your magic with your with your uh player with your character abilities and stuff and there's a lot of skill involved uh with that game. A great player will beat a bad player every single time. It's a lot of fun. I enjoy it. Yeah, I like a game like that. Describes

a lot of the types of games I like. Let me mix in a couple of advertisements here. Tell everybody about Audible. Could listening make you a better parent, a better leader, even a better person? Could listening to motivating fitness programs get you fit? Could listening inspire you to start something new? There's never been a better leader, even a better person? Could listening to motivating fitness programs get you fit? Could listening inspire you to start something new?

There's never been a better time to start listening on Audible. With Audible, you get access to an unbeatable selection of audiobooks, including bestsellers, motivation, mysteries, thrillers, memoirs, and more. Audible has the largest selection of audiobooks on the planet, and now with Audible Originals, the selection has gotten even more custom with content made just for their members. We recommend our audience check out our friend Anthony Cumia's book,

permanently suspended, The Rise and Fall, and Rise Again, of radio's most notorious shock jock over on Audible today, narrated by the man himself. Audible members can choose three titles every month, one audio book and two Audible Originals that you can't hear anywhere else. Audible members can choose three titles every month, one audio book and two audible originals and that you can't hear anywhere else. Audible members also get access to exclusive audio fitness programs to start

the new year off on the right foot. You can listen on any device, anytime, anywhere at home, at the gym, on the commute, or just on the go. You'll always,

you'll also enjoy easy audio book exchanges, rollover credits, and an audio book library that you keep forever, even if you cancel the service. Audible, the most inspiring minds, the most compelling stories, the best place to listen. Get started with a 30-day trial when you go to audible.com slash pka or just text pka to 500-500 and listen for a change. That's audible.com slash pka or text pka to 500500. Do not miss out on this offer. Audible is what I actually use.

If I do an audiobook, it's always through Audible. That's my thing. Absolutely. I do as well. I was really stupid at first. I guess not stupid. For some reason,

when I wanted to start with Game of Thrones, I just bought the discs, which sounds dumb, but my card didn't have Bluetooth capability, and I was like, when i when i wanted to start with game of thrones i just bought the discs which which sounds dumb but my car didn't have a bluetooth capability and i was like i'll just pop these discs in there it's it was i really wish i had just gotten the audible thing because then i'd still have it i lost those discs woody they're gone yeah you'd still have it and then the audible does a lot of things right like you can um uh can, like when you pause it and come back, it'll be in that spot again.

I don't use it, but doesn't Audible tie in with like e-ink so you can like listen to it for a while, read it for a while, then listen to where you left off? Yeah, on your e-reader, yeah. You can go back and forth really seamlessly. They've really got that figured out. Yeah, for sure. This episode of PK is also sponsored by our friends over at Squarespace.

Whether you need a domain, website, or online store, make your next move with Squarespace. With easy-to-use tools, you can create a beautiful website. With Squarespace, it's all in one platform, and there's nothing to install, patch, or upgrade ever. You can create a beautiful website or online store with an award-winning template. Squarespace's award-winning templates are the most beautiful way

to present your ideas online. Squarespace also offers a unique domain experience that's fully transparent and simple to set up. They're trusted by millions of people and some of the most respected brands in the world. Squarespace is used by a wide range of creatives and people, including musicians, designers, artists, restaurants, and more. Everybody needs their own corner of the internet today. So get started and start your free trial today over at squarespace.com slash pka and you will get 10% off your first purchase. That's squarespace.com slash pka. Begin the next move or possibly a Ponzi scheme in your career today with Squarespace. You can use it for all sorts of businesses, even that kind.

So no illegal businesses, please. No illegal businesses, obviously. Don't use our code if you're going to do that. It's an easy way to do it. The modules are simple, easy to move around. You don't need any prior knowledge. Even someone as fat-headed and dumb as me can figure it out. Literally and figuratively. Both of those words.

I'd like to measure your skull, because we joke about it. I've met you. I never thought, look at that melanoma guy. Thank God I was born post the era of phrenology well wait maybe they'd find you the last example of your bread neanderthal were you a c-section baby no i was a regular oh just i bet it's a disaster down there. How big of a baby were you? I actually was pretty normal.

37 pounds. 8 pounds, like 15 ounces. Yeah, but what proportion was in your head? Me too, me too, same weight. Well, that was the weird part, is 11 pounds of head. And a body made of helium. Yeah, and a body made of helium, yeah.

Like hand it to your dad. They're like, support the neck. I'm trying! So my dad has really good forearms from taking care of me as a child. Were any of you C-section kids? You remember those old things where you'd have that bird

that's weighted in the head so you can put its nose right on your finger? That's how Taylor was. His head's just holding him. He just put it on my chin and I put it down. Look at this. It's like black magic. Well, he's either going to be really smart or hard to concuss.

I bet you are hard to concuss. No, I was not a C-section baby. I came out the all-natural way. Yeah, I think I did too. How about you, Phil? Did you pop out all-natural way. Yeah, I think I did too. How about you, Phil? Did you pop out all natural? I did. Somehow that inspired my mother

to become a midwife with her own children. Were you guys breastfed? Yes. Were you? I don't know, actually. You should check up on that. Ask your mom. That seems like a weird question. Did you titty feed me? If she says no, you can be like, no wonder I have all these problems oh next time she gives me shit for absolutely

anything that's where that's gonna be my go-to yeah i once mentioned fed me we were like in the living room while watching something and i was like all of us have sucked on those boobies and my daughter thought that was an inappropriate conversation topic, it's almost like she's got some sort of sense of norms. No, that's hilarious. It is hilarious. Alright, kids, name one thing we all have in common. We've all been

in your mom's vagina. Daycare provider breastfed baby. That's not that weird because there are midwives unless she just up and did it on her own. Well, the baby was four. Ah, well, also there's the word secretly in the title.

Yeah. Yeah, I wouldn't like this. So this is a news article. This is a good segue. It wasn't really intended, but a mom said she caught a daycare provider secretly breastfeeding her baby.

She was horrified to discover that her childcare provider had been breastfeeding her baby without consent. I'm trying to find out exactly how old the baby is. She's doing her a favor. She should be paying extra for this, not being horrified. What if she has an STD, though? What if she's on antidepressants or some kind of drug? I'm not sure what comes through the breast milk, actually. What's that, Woody? I'm not sure what comes through the breast milk. What's that?

I'm not sure what comes through the breast milk. I think there's some filtering going on. Am I crazy or do I make that up? I think I've heard that. You shouldn't be drinking much alcohol when you're breastfeeding. Alcohol and drugs. Marijuana can come through it.

That's the new craze right there. You remember that scene in Mad Max where they had all the women hooked up to the titty pumps? In the future, we're going to get women. I need those women getting baked as fuck. They're just stoned out of their gourds making this green pot milk. Well, fuck if that's an idea.

Now, the Chinese, they already have this. It looks like a woman, but body of a pig. Eight tits. I shit you not, eight full-size American-breasted t like a woman, but body of a pig. Eight tits. I shit you not, eight full-size American-breasted tits under there, milking all of them. Hear me out on this, Kyle. Why don't I just get super baked and let them blow me? It doesn't come through.

Because that's a crime. It's worth a try, and through God, all things are possible. So jot that down. Can the Lord not make a stone so big that he himself couldn't make my semen as healthy and nutritious as a woman's breast milk? Aquinas

discussed this at length. I don't think he did. He may have, though. He may have. Lots of smart guys talked about weird shit too wasn't like uh wasn't isaac newton didn't he also believe in alchemy and he spent huge amounts of time fucking with lead and that's eventually would kill them what is it yeah why do they think you can turn lead into gold is it close on the periodic table? Yeah, the atomic weight's very similar. They weigh about the same. They're very close on the periodic table. And obviously, the other draw would be that one of them is incredibly cheap,

and the other is incredibly valuable. And for a long time, that's been one of the greatest pursuits of mankind and people trying to do that led to so many huge discoveries like like alchemy led to a ton of real science because it's it basically had actually smart guys sitting in a makeshift laboratory mixing elements together and heating them up and combining them in certain ways under pressures and different variables and they they cook up some cool shit occasionally oh yeah like those fake sciences came out with real deal discoveries a lot of the time phrenology again led the way in one size fits all cap sizes all star wouldn't be where they are today. They didn't have it. So this is outside of the kind of thing that I know. I'm like, is it not possible somehow to add three electrons and three protons? Am I doing this right?

To lead? It should be. You would think it would be. You would think that would be something we had mastered. I bet Alex, oh, I'd love, this is the question I'd love to Alex Jones. Just say, Alex, Alex. love, this is the question I'd love to Alex Jones. Just say, Alex, Alex. Yeah, yeah.

Alchemy. And then just sit back and watch. I bet he's got a whole thing. No, what he would say is you're like, you know one thing I know isn't real? Alchemy.

You'd think I'd be a genius at this given that I took chemistry twice in high school, but no. Turns out, that didn't happen. You had to take chemistry twice in high school, but no, turns out that didn't happen. You had to take chemistry twice?

I've told the story where I needed a good final grade and I literally just answered everyone in a few seconds. So yeah, I took chemistry twice. I showed them. And I'm just not very good at it. That's the truth.

I don't know if chemistry was taught. That's the truth. I had a chemistry was taught chemistry was taught as it was discovered, which means it's like two steps forward, like three backwards. And you just do that again and again and again. Yeah. I literally don't remember the periodic table. It's supposed to have some missing things at the bottom center here.

Like all of these were discovered more recently. Yeah. Like math is taught like systematically right you build up from like fundamentals and use this to move further into like complicated stuff chemistry is taught as it was fucking discovered it's like a bunch of idiots who had the wrong ideas with the wrong suppositions and then like stuff came out of that and it's taught that way and for me i hated that i hated that breakdown of how what do you mean like just for those of us who don't know anything well i haven't been in chemistry since high school either but like roughly that that same type of idea for that which was like okay well people believe this to begin with and you're

like okay and then you follow it out and they're like and they were totally wrong and i'm like well why the fuck are you teaching it that you know what filthy that chemistry isn't the topic where i have that criticism yeah biology is where i go on that like it diet is a real good example like fats being terrible then you go to let's just do this butter's bad go to margarine margins bad go back to butter different kinds of fats good fats bad fats eggs have gone up and down the healthy escalator or elevator you know many times in my lifetime. Yeah.

There are some fundamentals. Keto is like that now, like where I can't get a straight answer out of anybody. It's like ketosis is something that you want that's just a smart way to do dieting or is it like toxic long term for your kidneys? Like we don't, I have no fucking idea at the end of this. Yeah. I can't get a straight response out of anyone. I've started, so embarrassingly, almost every winter I gain some weight. I think it's because I get that seasonal effect disorder a little bit.

Depression is too big an exaggeration. But I just feel a little less motivated to go outside. I'm kind of locked up, cooped up. It's been rainy. So I'm sort of coming out of that now. And I've been doing the intermittent fasting thing. I go... Do you like it I go, I eat and eat.

Yeah. Do you like it? Yeah, I think I do. So look, it's early. I'm like 10 days into this, which I like to say second week. But I'm finding it to be, one, like a really easy rule to follow. Like you can look at your watch and figure out if you can eat or not. What's your time frame?

I eat from noon to 8 p.m that's my window okay and sometimes i fuck it up a little bit but usually just with like a coffee black coffee's okay but that's not how i drink it so i actually screw up but i'll have like a coffee or something and make it to noon but um uh and it just it seems easier for me to follow than the more complicated set of like, you know, all the calorie counting and stuff. So we'll see. I kind of hate you a little bit when you say that, Woody, because you said I'm just starting to come out of it. And I learned yesterday, I was told by my building manager, this is the most amount of snow we've had in Wisconsin in February in 120 years. I feel like we're...

You're experiencing history. Yeah. And I also get a little bit of that too like my motivation goes down a little bit in the winter months and it just does not seem to fucking end up here i keep waiting keep waiting you're like coming out of it is it spring in north carolina or uh it it spring fall spring came so you know we've got some cold days in front of us looking at the forecast but But yeah, it was like 77 and sunny and stuff like that. But that's past. We had an ice storm today. We have had

I don't know that we're breaking records like you, but like February in North Carolina is good for like seven days of rain, right? I think we've had 10 days in the last two weeks. You know, it's just been a ton of rain. Yeah. Like you're like, you know, I'm like a ton of rain yeah like you're like you know seasonal affective disorder i'm like i know what i coped with fucking winter with alcohol

and like that's fine during the summer months i can be active enough it's not a big deal here but it's like dragging yourself out when it's i mean we got negative 50 degree weather yeah two weeks what'd you do like shitty that to me is an emergency like yeah right what do you do when it's negative 50 out i assume you don't insta die although i'm not positive if you step outside don't insta die i did i wanted to know so i went out and stood in it for a little bit in the morning of like the first day was going to be negative 50 i'm like all right i don't think i've ever been in negative 50 i'm like i'm gonna go fucking experience what this is like you know i put on like jackets and sweaters and all snow pants and that shit and went out and just stood in it it's really cold turns out you're sure were you were you like excited like wow this is the coldest i've ever

felt or was it like yeah this i do live here don't i yeah clever well done pat myself on the back for that one so so how much longer do you have to be there? My wife has accepted a tenure track position here. So you just could be permanent. Could be indefinite. Ah, so you might need to start enjoying the indoors more. To answer

Woody, you're right. What do you do for that? We had two weeks of that. What were they calling it? The weather patterns basically came down from the polar polar blast vortex polar vortex that's right right so what did i do i spent fucking two weeks in the in the apartment that's basically what i did for that what do you do during that time like like to stay like like like if you're not streaming you're not taking in some sort of media like do you do you have like a stationary bike oh thank you right i do have a stationary bike here there is a you. I do have a stationary bike here.

There's a communal weight room in the place that has a stationary bike. I do actually use it. Do you find the stationary bike satisfying though? I don't finish a stationary bike session and think good things. That would just kind of suck.

Oh, I do because there's never a time where you're further away from having to stationary bike again than when you just get off the stationary bike for me a stationary bike is like 10 degrees better than a fucking treadmill treadmills are the most tedious boring things to work out on elliptical man elliptical is so good i i love the elliptical so so much but the the thing is like taylor got a cheap one because he was experimenting he wanted to see what the deal was i bet you hate it i own one that was four thousand five thousand dollars no that's not even a good one it's not even a fucking good that that's an okay elliptical all right it's got blue does yours move and shimmy around as you try and use it

well after wings after wings use it a few times it it makes all kinds of noises and does all kinds of things but but but no it's it's an excellent excellent elliptical it's got you know it's got the fans it's got bluetooth capability it's got all the digital bullshit that you would expect all of the the courses you can program into it the handles are cushy the the pedals are oversized and and wonderful the gliders are are hydraulic and smooth as silk is it sitting in storage now with all the other gym stuff it's sitting in storage right now i i should probably move it in because i've got i got plenty of room for a gym i've got a lot of rooms you should man the uh but the um the gym that that i i go to man i i don't even know how much their elliptical costs because

it is fucking twice as good as my elliptical i fucking love that thing and you know i i feel like i do i feel like i'm doing work but it's it there's no impact it doesn't hurt my lower back is it like a local gym or like a gym related to your housing situation? So close. No, no, no. It's like a local gym. It's like a 24-hour fitness type place. Sometimes my sleep schedule is around the clock all the time. So sometimes I'll wake up and it'll be like 3 a.m. And I'm fully rested.

Maybe I went to bed at like 9 p.m. I thought you were about to say fully aroused. I thought you were going to get too drunk. I can solve that problem. I'm fully aroused. And I know that's when the homeless men are bathing at the 24-hour gym. And that's when I know I'm not gay. Not gay, not gay. I just go to the 24-hour gym at 4 in the morning because that's when my friends are there.

My bagger-assisted raging hard-on. So I check out the elliptical. I only take that for the pump. That's right. Only to get the veiny pump in my arms yeah i mean you joke about that that amount of blood from just regular circulation yeah put that in the dick you're really gonna get the muscle workout you need with the remaining amount of blood in your body taylor you joke about that dan bilzerian like when he um a while back on instagram he put put out what his cycle was, right? Like what he took to be Dan Bilzerian.

And he showed how much testosterone he injected and how much everything he put into his body. And part of it is Viagra. Part of it is sildenafil for pump and obviously for his dick and for a number of things. for pump and obviously for his dick and for a number of things like it definitely helps with, you know, getting a pump on and getting getting getting good if you're going to probably if you're going to take some Instagram pics, because whenever you see him on Instagram, he's like wearing like a speedo and a bow tie with like four gorgeous women. And he's just ripped as fuck. That's all. That's very cool. He's right right at 40 i would say around 40 yeah that's nice to be ripped at 40 he's so ripped yeah he's if you're ripped at 20 you know what you're not alone there

are lots of people ripped at 20 if you're ripped at 40 you are a unicorn congratulations that's true yeah i was looking at those ellipticals but like you were saying kyle like three four grand for like a good one i ended up i bought a nordic track uh treadmill for like 700 and put it together and it it's great it works awesome yeah i have a nice treadmill too god i can't stand treadmills i just can't i can't my girlfriend really wanted it on them boring i get really bored with it so i think i'm gonna take like a boxing class or something like that so i can fool myself into doing cardio where i like i i get like i see a goal and i go to that instead of running where every step of running and every

like yeah just like the thought is like this sucks this sucks if you do if you just do five four minute rounds every day on your heavy bag and like like learn a few combinations like like like nothing complicated just a repetition like a one two three one two three one two three a a jab a straight and then and then a body hook or something like yeah and you just repeat that over and over like not only will you get good form and you'll be i don't know maybe competent at like hitting some guy one time at a bar sometime because because's probably going to happen eventually. It's nice. There's a little community.

There's other people there. They hit you back, though. No, they don't. My boxing, we only hit each other in the head on Fridays. And then outside of that, it was neck down, which we got good training on. We only hit each other in the head on Fridays. I swear to God, yes.

Some guy comes in for day one, just, oh, this place sucks. I'm on God, yes. Some guy comes in for day one, just, oh, this place sucks. I'm on Friday, bitch. Yeah, we sparred every session pretty much. I would have, all I want to do is spar. To me, that's the playing stuff. The work, the effort is all the burpees and heavy bag stuff. Like, that was the exhausting part. But the drillers are killers, right?

That's where you learn. Yeah. But usually if it wasn't Friday, like you would just aim for like the clavicle or something and you'd get trading in without head damage. Yeah. I'd still rather dance around and hit a heavy bag than run. Yeah, I agree. I don't know.

Psychologically, there's something there where you can. It's great. It's great cardio. I feel like you're getting stronger hitting that bag. You're learning form. I want you to have the experience. I thought form. I want you to have the experience. I thought you were going to. I want you to have the experience I had in that there's five people in a line all doing burpees,

blasting a heavy bag, more burpees, that thing where you lay on your back and ride an imaginary bicycle in the air and go. And you don't want to be the pussy. There's four of you in a line. You're the new guy. Keep up. And I think that you would, it'd be, it'd be good for you.

Like, it'd be good. I like, I've had to do that with like, uh, uh, it was a hockey trial for really high level team years and years and years ago where like,

and it was like, it was just the goalie section of the tryout. So it was just me and 30 other goalies out there however many it was and every usually like in a tryout as a goalie you're like like they'll make they'll take you aside and do stuff but then they need to test the actual players and so they're like all right get in that we need to see what they can do against you guys and we can take notes on it or whatever and as a goalie you're like okay this is my realm i'm okay with this just keep shooting at me that's easy but then they'll do stuff where you have to do like up downs on your knees uh do burpees and your full stuff do the like uh ladders

is what they call it in basketball i don't know what it was and like ice sprinting or whatever for hockey and i remember doing that and at one point like i was like man this is harder than usual and like 20 minutes later after for every like one minute thinking like they can't they can't push us anymore they can't push us anymore. They can't push us anymore. I get to the point where it's like, I'm going to fucking vomit. I cannot vomit at this tryout. And at least I cannot be the first person to vomit.

And someone vomited on the ice. And something about seeing the reaction of the coaches and even my own visceral reaction to him vomiting of like weak was like like my own urge to vomit went away but i was like do i want to be that guy no let's just take the effort down five percent and not be laying in our own vomit on the ice i have a different reaction like i saw it and i heard a story of it on the track team, but I've seen it on the swim team where a guy would work so hard, he would vomit, not in the pool.

I forget if it was on the edge where you could just splash it towards one of the many drains or in a trash can. And then they get right back in and work out some more. And I always had a measure of respect for a guy who did that. I agree. I agree.

I've done that before for sure. Like I've gone to the gym and like, you know, been on like a low calorie diet, like just basically just just grilled chicken breast like that and like salad with vinaigrette and like been on this super low calorie diet and just been working super, super hard and be like, all right right i gotta go outside and vomit now i'll be back and it's like yeah i vomited and now i'm getting back on the machine yeah i feel good about that i don't feel bad about vomiting when i'm if i'm working out like it's that's how you know you're really fucking pushing oh if i'm working out alone and i push myself that

hard like okay i could see that but at a tryout oh yeah i don't want to be the guy who's yeah yeah they're like oh this guy's cardio is clearly weaker than the rest or whatever the rationality but in a training situation where you're trying to max out like yeah maybe they might have said different things i might have been like look how well that guy eats he really likes putting it to his body some brunswick stew or something like that how many different kinds of pasta did you eat before i see rigatoni i see angel hair i see but yeah the diet things so there's a youtuber called picture fit i do i have i i think i tried to get taylor hooked on picture fit it's always been, I love picture fit. I think he does an amazing job.

Uh, there are fitness videos, but what he does is he takes a whole bunch of like research studies, correlates them, and then makes a video that I think is entertaining. Whenever I'm like, Jackie, Jackie,

watch this one, watch this one. It's like showing else someone a video you thought was funny or a song you thought was good where they're like, uh, not to me. That's been my experience. But anyway, he did one on intermittent fasting and sold me on it.

And it's just an easier way to have fewer calories. I have already figured out how to be an asshole to some extent. Like, it's 7.45 p.m. I'm going to have a fistful of almonds because I'm not eating for 16 hours when, you know know maybe i could just not eat but uh almonds i i've been munching on cashews the last few days responsibly though but like even then i'll take like a handful maybe get another half handful and i'll be like in my

fitness pal or whatever and i'll be like oh god damn it 600 calories dude and three days worth of fat it's not for someone like filthy that's great because he's being you know rock climbing for me i'm trying to try to cut this trash off the front of my body yes i've been sous-viding chicken i uh i throw chicken breasts into the ziploc bag and uh sous-vide it with a bunch of spices and i do a different spice like mixture every time sometimes i do like lemon and uh and peppers and stuff like that like a little like like and that's really tasty sometimes sometimes i do like honey and and cayenne and uh and then i put that in a salad of iceberg lettuce with a little bit of i got the olive garden salad dressing i love the olive garden salad dressing and uh and that's that's one of my

favorite meals like the one vinaigrette on earth that's not good for you it's not great for you but but like i need calories because i'm about to hop on the the elliptical or whatever you know i need some fuel he's a fuel for the fire what are you doing when you're going to the gym now elliptical mostly yeah elliptical any weight stuff or dumbbell fooling around with that no i'm just so powerful already you know i don't want to get too strong yeah that's true that is an issue i don't want to start like breaking eggs in my hand when i try to crack them don't you hate it when you crush a doorknob you know you just wanted to open the door and i do that like i don't want to i don't want to get too strong i want to get too ripped that's what i do when i go to like someone's house and they have a they have a piano and i go

it's like i don't want to i don't want to suddenly break out into a symphony here i try not to get too strong you know that's a big fear of mine and getting too swole as they say you know i i don't want that i don't want to get i'm gonna be some big monster of a human being so you want to be tactfully strong yeah yeah my body just responds so well with my with my you know i've got some super genes rock i've been watching uh this one fitness channel more and more the and they do like a lot of grip strength stuff and i was thinking i was like oh i should bring this up to Filthy if I haven't before next time he's on. Because doing like you don't do any kind of traditional weightlifting or anything like that. Right.

For the most part. Well, I do nine rounds. So when I moved up here, I lost all my rock climbing. So I've been up here now since September and I haven't rock climbed since then. It's killing me. You haven't found a gym? There isn't an indoor gym around this area. Not within reasonable travel time. I was going three climbed since then. It's killing me. You haven't found a gym? There isn't an indoor gym around this area. Not within reasonable travel time.

I was going three times a week. It was a 10-minute drive for me. There's nothing within. I think the nearest one is Milwaukee, which is an hour and a half for me. Jesus Christ. Can you do it in your place? Because I'll tell you, I've thought about just putting bouldering stuff all over the walls of our little weightlifting room. That might be fun. No, I can't just attach grips to the walls of our little weightlifting room yeah like that might be fun yeah no i can't just like attach wall like grips to the inside

of my apartment and then just like yeah i think that would not go over real well i made it better he watches movies looking over the side have you seen or did you ever notice like your grip strength being really good or do anything that like required grip and you're like oh i'm really good at this because like everybody says that rock climbers are like like yeah unnaturally good at grip for people who don't lift weights do you notice a lot of that shit when you're climbing and like just since then i'm of course i noticed any of that shit but you notice a lot of that i notice i'm missing some of the core stuff i used to do a lot of i'm doing a lot of cardio stuff now i joined nine round which is you know what he's talking about boxing training it's not quite that but they basically made that into an aerobic

workout so it's a lot of punching bags and kicking shit and burpees and push-ups and this kind of stuff and i hate it like it's great it's great it gets me out of the house and i go do it but it's not fucking rock climbing and it's and it's just like after a while i'm just bored again i'm bored with it and it's like they at least for that at least they're changing up the up they change up the exercises every time i go in there it's like you know it's literally nine rounds of three minute exercises all different every time i go which is great but i still hate it compared to rock climbing i'm just like man i fucking hate this i don't have this with me anymore so if rock climbing is just off the table which it seems like

it is yeah and this nine round shit is you're hating it what's kind of on your short list i think that's six weeks a year of quality outside bicycling yeah and what's your i like outdoor i like outdoor biking yeah to get into like regular weight lifting or a sport or something else you're gonna do to try and it's so hard to do that in the winter like what the hell do you do when it's just like cross-country skiing yeah get into hockey man cross-country skiing yeah there's a part of me that i did some of that growing up and i did some of that high school growing up part of me hates working out in the cold like outdoors in the cold because you get that kind of like you're doing something cardio and you're also like hot you know so you do like that like it's freezing cold out you're sweating you're pooling sweat but you're in like winter clothing and it's like that horrible fucking combination of

i mean i just gotta suck it up and do something for that because i gotta figure out something in this area oh i enjoy that feeling that like being warm when it's cold out kind of work i i thought you were going to describe like because once i get to that that's where my happy starts it's the like building up the internal warmth and core you know of getting going that where they're i like that i have to dread through that to get to the good part i just don't like i mean i do that too like you go you go start working out you're going you're like you start and you're like you're like fuck i gotta take off my sweater it's freezing cold you start working out you feel warm that's great i'm not talking about i'm talking the combination

of extreme outdoor cold with sweating and like wet and like winter weather gear which is what like uh cross-country skiing has always been for me at least cross-country skiing is pretty pretty cardio heavy cross-country street skiing looks horrible right it looks like no fun at all really yeah it looks really really hard and not rewarding because at no point do you get to go really fast that easily yeah are there any mountains by you no oh no mountains are trash heaps around here that's not so you're not like in wisconsin i like the packers i like the no i'm a patriots fan so i'm fine i'm set i'm set on the i'm set for a while still on uh on football no I like the people here people here are great people here have been phenomenal that's the redeeming feature of Wisconsin that and they're all drinkers around here everyone's a drinker

around here it's great there's a bazillion bars they're all within walking distance it's good for lots of things it's not so good for like uh what is my fitness plan gonna be I'm like well there's 10 bars within walking distance that are open at 6 a.m. and don't close till 2. That's not bad. And they all sell solid blocks of cheese that actually just are on the table like appetizers. It's like, what are you saying? There's certain hours. It turns out my hours are 2 a.m. till 6 a.m. Those are my do not drink hours.

So I got that covered. He's intermittent sobering four hours a day. I only drink eight hours a day. No, 20. 20 on, four off. Eight? What are you? Southerner?

So it feels a bit, yeah, I don't know. So I got to, you're right. So I don't know what the short list is, Taylor. I got to figure out the short list. I'm hoping here that I find something because, man, I do miss that climbing a lot. Start it. Great the the business the culture doesn't seem too expensive to make a rock climbing gym just a regular industrial rental place and some plywood you're off to the races thank you you could just like flag off a natural climbing area like in a park the trash just run it out of there up until you get uh in trouble with the law yeah i could just maybe like take over the side of

someone's like office building you know i know i'm not this isn't illegal i'm like banksy but for climbing reddit post about me and how I'm cool. That guy hasn't done anything in a while. Remember when he was pretty big? Oh, has he? No, he did that thing maybe six months ago where one of his paintings was being auctioned off. It destroyed itself. I think it was awesome.

It self-destructed. That's true. That was good. That was crazy. They say that the gallery, the auction house was in on it and they're maybe so like they were filming it and like they sort of well the filming was just a person in the audience it's like some shaky cell phone there were a number of people filming it though the thing i read like implied that they were i wish i could remember the details of what they had for evidence yeah it comes in its own frame that weighs 30 pounds

and kind of rattles if you shake it. There's a slot on the side for no particular reason. With teeth in it. Kind of looks like a paper shredder. You want to see someone try to rob a gun store? Yes. What a retard.

Never try to rob a gun store no those guys are sitting around all day like man it would be real cool if someone tried to rob us like that'd be stupid no one's coming in here tj i'm really good friends i'm really good friends with a lot of guys who who own their own gun stores a few of them and i'm telling you that's what they're waiting on okay and and i've seen what they have waiting on the person they're like yeah i got my i got my mossberg tactical shotgun right here it's loaded with buckshot if someone ever were to come in and try to fucking rob us i'm gonna fucking explode his chest right there in the lobby i wish i wish a motherfucker would that

best part is that's probably like you can use that that footage is probably like you could just advertise with that that adds credibility to your product yeah you're like someone tried to rob us here and this is what i blew them up with on the, that's literally all that's left of the last person to try to rob me when I had XYZ. We like to mount the remnants next to the gun that did it, and we sell the actual gun. I was going to say, all these Mossbergs are

$175. That one's $250. It's proven. Now we inlaid into the handle of this Remington 870. We used to kill that gentleman is we inlaid his gold tooth. It's like a Rottweiler. They trade that Mossberg to have a taste for blood.

You guys ready? Yeah. 3, 2, 1, play. Warning, graphic guy. I don't trust this music. Cool music. I've got it muted. I do, too.

I didn't at first. It's like German club music. Yeah. Jimmy Groove. Two armed men enter the store. Look at him. He's planning. They're both like, oh, yeah.

Oh, he's eating Christmas already. Oh, my God., you did Christmas already. Oh, my God. That guy's very dead. He's very dead. Jimmy Groover put three in this guy's chest. Jimmy Groover's ready to rock and roll. Oh, he missed the second guy, though. He already killed him one.

Maybe a little bit of decision paralysis, like he's got too many options. Fuck, what do i shoot this guy with i like to think he only had a permit for one robber funny if you like he had caught his limit already that day yeah to pick up a different gun man that guy that was so fast it's almost like one of them is a robber and the other one works at a gun store like he went down and just immediately and that guy it looked like you know and kyle probably knows better but it looked like he got hit like two times and was like what's happening and then as he's falling and crumpling

like three more go in and by the time he hits the ground he's just yeah dead that guy got killed instantly pretty much he got hit in the spine or something like that or in the head like he got hit somewhere where it counts. I was going to say that too. Sometimes people fall backwards and they're almost, this is what I've read on a mini experience, but they're almost trained to jump backwards from Hollywood.

Sometimes guys crumple down. He looked like a knockout victim. That's something I've seen a lot of. Yep. It was like a UFC knockout. He got hit in the spine or the head i wouldn't be surprised with either one uh that guy knew what he was doing he was older gentleman late 50s and he looked like you know full white hair yeah like that guy's been waiting since the fucking reagan administration for some punk to come in there and try to rob his fucking gun store

i cannot think of a worse place to try to rob. Maybe a military base. Yeah. Maybe like military base is number one. Don't try to rob that. Cause like live ammunition exercise or something. Maybe that would be slightly worse. A target range. Actually in a tank or something.

Try to rob the target range. Yeah. That would be a mistake too. But you try to rob the fucking gun store. I'm telling you i know these guys like i know a lot of them they are looking to kill they have been wanting to kill for years they've been practicing to kill they watch john wick over and over on fucking okay they wish you they wish a motherfucker would come stomp their beagle out so that they could come and rain death and destruction upon you

with the skills that they have acquired over decades of training and shooting at paper. This guy, he was most mad. He was most mad about the fact that, and the worst part about it, they put it on the news and they named our store. And so now say goodbye to any other people stopping in with guns. I wasn't sure where you were going.

Yeah, that guy could not be more stupid. Say goodbye to all the other robbers. I think that's right. But that resonates with me. I think that on some level, this is why I really don't think MMA training, as cool as I think it is, I really like the fact that it's a method that actually works above and beyond. That to me is really, really, really cool. But i think that would be bad for me long run to like do it like even if it were just like a physical exercise because i think at some point i'd want

to use it you know when someone is just being like fucking shitty at the bar or something i would just want to do that i'd be like i've been training for this for the last year you know what happened to me so here's the The reality of mixed martial arts training is take Conor McGregor and put him up against Taylor, except Taylor has a knife. I bet on Taylor every single fucking time. I know, but Taylor probably bets on Conor in that scenario because he's just been training day in and day out

about how to do this well. Only if he does it no better. I had this experience. I was training day in and day out in how to do this well. And I think I got- Only if he doesn't know better. I had this experience. I was training day in and day out in MMA for a couple of years. And I was also into off-roading at the same time. So a bunch of guys rented like this trailer in Kentucky. And at some point we start talking about guns, right?

Me, a bunch of rednecks. Literally every single person at that table, there were like nine of us, took our gun out, laid it on the table, and compared. Like, what do you carry? What do you got? What do you have? Everybody was armed. So you're really rolling the dice, at least in North Carolina. If you're expecting, you know, like, you're not

getting in too many fights before you get shot. I've got a knife on me all the time. It's just, it's a Leatherman. I use it to open boxes or whatever. But it's not completely lost on me. Like, it would also poke people yeah when any fight i ever get into because i'll cut him you know it's it's it's it's best to try to resolve your your yeah i feel like disagreement's peaceful being able to fight is a not a useful skill and i feel like a lot of fighters would tell you that yeah that's right yeah i'm worried that like what lot of fighters would tell you that yeah that's what

i'm yeah i'm worried that like what it would do would fuck with my actual rational assessment of stuff like this is a really dumb idea i do not want to get punched in the face by this idiot for no fucking reason whatsoever to be like yeah i was training for that i'll be ready for this and he stabs me yeah that'd be the end result of it'd be like see but you're smart enough to know like you're not a high schooler like you're an adult an intelligent guy like like it's not a movie if shit starts going down in real life and a guy in a bar wants to fight you you don't start duking it out because you'll end up in jail bar it's not like you're there disgusting you're not there like you're not there like reading the most recent fucking science papers over there you know you're drinking speak for

yourself this doesn't exactly make your your judgment process that much better. You know, it's like I remember at a time, one time a friend was telling me, he's like, you know, he's like, he's like, I drive better drunk. I'm like, no, you're a drunk. You're just an idiot. That's just you that the courage and the confidence that alcohol is giving you in this moment. So you're like, yeah, you're a smart guy. No, when I'm when I'm drinking too much, I'm an idiot. Like every other human fucking being is drinking too much. Like, yeah, it's like I bet you think you're better at fucking when you're drunk, too, filthy. No. When I'm drinking too much, I'm an idiot like every other human fucking being who's drinking too much.

It's like, I bet you think you're better at fucking when you're drunk too, don't you? Right? I'm sure that goes over well. I'm just a god. As you're pushing a 60% hard dick. I've had 10 shots in 4 fucking Viagras. Does Viagra overcome whiskey?

I would guess. You are not supposed to drink on those pills. It says so on the site. I don't take Viagra overcome whiskey? I would guess. You are not supposed to drink on those pills. It says so on the side. I don't take Viagra. I take Tadalafil. It says for both of them because they're both vasodilators. I don't fucking care. I don't fucking care.

Taylor, you stop it with your science-y stuff. You drink enough. You're trying to just make up words and convince me of something. I'm not giving you a professional opinion here. I'm just telling you what old Kyle here does, okay? And if you're going to be entertaining a young lady, what I do is I like to have a few drinks. I've had a few drinks tonight.

When I stepped away a few minutes ago, I had myself, you know, I don't measure alcohol. I think that's what losers do. Your standard quart of Tito's? I had a good old double gulp as much as I could, you know, gulp at once. I had chased it with a bit of apple juice,

bit of Mott's and, but, but yeah, if I am going to have a young lady over, we're going to be doing a bit of, bit of drinking and that can affect one's erection. Okay. So I take myself filthy.

I ask you a question. I take myself 10 milligrams of Tadalafil and I chew it up and an hour later we're ready to rock and fucking roll. Did you say 90 minutes later? An hour. I would say about an hour.

This is the same exact conversation we just had though. This is now once you pumped all your blood into your dick now you're making decisions about whether or not it's good to be doing this in general which yeah yeah i could see that once i have my fucking you know i have a couple drinks at the bar and i'm feeling tough and like you know i've done some training that's when i decide it's a good time to have a have a fight right like this guy wants to fight my dick's never been harder i'm ready to go i have a question for filthy so i come my my drinking education stopped in high school.

That's when I got into sports and kind of got away. And we counted drinks very much. We counted drinks. And if you were an asshole, you counted other people's drinks. So I have five beers in and you're only three. And Kyle, on the other hand, doesn't count drinks at all. And I feel like, is that normal? Is that what adults do?

Count drinks? Do you know how many drinks you've had uh i can i can reflect back on it and probably tell you but i don't think i count in the moment like i'm certainly not sitting there comparing for that it's not a point yeah it depends on like where you are like if i had a friend up a couple weeks ago who came out to visit not a super close friend but like a guy climbing buddy right came up to visit me in this area and we were out one uh we were out one of the nights there and his thing was he wanted to see the town he just wanted to go to every single dive bar and just like meet people there and that was his thing and we were doing that for one night and the second night he was getting a bit shitty at the end and i couldn't he was being a jerk getting a bit drunk

no no he was being a bit shitty at the end and one of the things I wish I had known was how he dealt with alcohol and how many drinks he'd had. But it wasn't something that was consciously on my mind. I wasn't like counting his drinks as we are at these bars. I had no real idea because then I could have been like, oh, he's just drunk being a dickhead as opposed to whatever else could have been at that moment. So I guess I think I'm with Kyle on that. I don't as you know, yeah. When you're in college playing drinking games or whatever else, you might be like, yeah,

I've had X, Y, Z because you're an idiot and think it means something. But at this point, yeah, I'm not looking for example, Mardi Gras. There's a,

there's a big Mardi Gras thing every year here. And I'm going to go for a while this weekend. And when I'm at Mardi Gras day drinking, I'm not going to, I'm not driving there or back. And so I'm just going to drink until I feel good and drunk and then enjoy the rest of my day. But if I'm out eating dinner and I drove there and I'm like, oh, you know what?

I would like a beer or two. You obviously keep track. You're not going to be like, bring me another. And it's like, but we're about to leave and you need to drive. It's kind of just common sense with that shit. Yeah, yeah. You know, I'm drinking to achieve a certain apple juice and vodka burp yeah i did yeah when you say that i can like i can like smell it now

that you've said that like before it was a little internet burp and now it's kyle drinks like a 17 year old girl i i don't think i do you know i i gotta chase it with something i don't want to drink straight vodka and no chaser No, you've done that on the show a couple of recent times and I thought it was very cool, very Russian of you and you didn't take a chaser I think I almost always chase it

I know there's a couple of really cool times I'm saying cool on purpose I think apple juice lends itself really well to a chaser because orange juice is really acidic and it gives me heartburn. It's not as smooth I don't feel like as apple juice is. Apple juice is very sweet, obviously.

It covers up any sort of burn or foul taste that vodka might bring along with it. You eat nice steaks, so I assume with your juice you're you're always never from concentrate no absolutely not from concentrate i get i get very fancy does he look like a peasant to you i was i was hoping not i get those uh i can't remember the name of it like martelli's or something i've shown it on the show before that big glass uh yeah that's like

cloudy apple juice that you need to shake up first to get all the sediment mixed around. It's very tasty stuff. Very tasty. I don't like doing sugar with my alcohol because it's just a worse hangover for me generally. I don't get hangovers at all. Like for me to get a hangover, I have to drink an incredible amount.

I've literally only had one hangover in my entire life. And it was when we went to Austin, Texas and we decided we're going to hit every single bar on Sixth. Six street is like the party, like, like street there in Austin. And there's maybe a dozen, 15 bars. And I put, I w I was looking to get laid, uh, to be honest, but I went on Twitter and Facebook and I was like, Hey, we're in Austin, Texas on six street. Does anyone want to come and party with us? A few dudes showed up, right? Three dudes and one girl showed up, and I think

she was with one of the guys. The PKA demo. And she didn't even want to come. They're like, come on, I want to go hang out with this gun guy on the internet. She was cool, to be honest. It was like me and my dad, and my cousin, and my friend, and these four fans

and they were they were they were like super fans and they wanted to buy alcohol for me all night and so i didn't really have to buy any alcohol but every bar you know first we went to the end of the street because we we got the waldorf hotel i think it was whatever it was this fancy hotel on one end of the street and so we went to the opposite end of the street, like, like all the way down and we worked our way back toward the hotel. That way, when we were at our drunkest,

we're right next to our hotel. We can, we can get in there and find some refuge. And at first it was great. You know, there's live music. It's a, it's a real kick in place.

Like Austin's awesome. Austin's awesome. Like there's live music at like half the bars and like, like good, good live music. There's the R and B and blues and a little rock and roll and like great musicians. I felt like,

like I was always entertained and the whole time I'm just every bar I'm having at least two drinks. And by the time we get, and they're buying them for me for free. And I remember pieces of that night it's that it's only twice have i ever had like a bit of memory loss that was one night and the other night was a pka drinking episode when i made fun of riley from being potentially paralyzed uh i got fucking shit face that night but like they're buying me drinks you know and it's it's free vodka is just

and it just when it's just showing up and you don't even have to like yeah i would like a beer or yeah yeah yeah get me a shot of absolute vodka or a shot of titos or whatever no no it's just there you're like hey here's another shot we're all doing another round it's like well okay then i got i got so so so so drunk it was awful i remember pieces that night i I remember at one point, I was pretty chill the whole night. I didn't start any fights. I didn't mess with anybody's girl or anything like that.

But the shittiest thing that I did was there was a punching machine. You know, one of those things where you put a dollar in and you hit it as hard as you can. I remember vaguely that someone put their dollar in and I was like,

no, my turn. And I punched it on their dollar. And I still feel guilty about punching that machine at his fucking dollar. He should have punched me. Just to see how strong he was. Yeah. Yeah. Good.

That's almost like robbing a gun shop. What you just did there. Yeah. Yeah. One step away. And then they're like, no, it's mine. What is the natural response of that? All right.

I'll just go try to rob an MMA gym just wearing brass knuckles. Give me all your stuff. I still feel like an asshole for doing that to that guy. I don't remember, but maybe somebody gave him a dollar in my stead. I was with some guys who were varying levels of drunkness. I wasn't the drunkest. I wasn't the drunkest in the group. But yeah, Austin, Texas is a great fucking place.

I love Austin. I've only flown through. I've never hung out in Austin. Man, if you ever get a chance to have a layover or something or spend a day or a night in Austin, it's a great fucking place. It's, it's so weird. It's so different from the rest of Texas.

Texas is an enormous place, right? It takes up like this gargantuan part of our country, but you know, Dallas and Houston, completely different lands, you know? And it's,

it's like something out of like Lord of the Rings or something like that. It's like, Oh, well that's the Shire over there. And, uh, this is Mordor over here. They're completely different.

Yeah, and that's how Texas is in a lot of regards. El Paso's different. You know, you get Tex-Mex on one side and you get sort of Southern style on another side and you get a whole different like Western vibe. But yeah, Austin is sort of this trendy, younger crowd that's much, much, much, much more liberal, much younger, much hipper. And they have a great beer scene when I was there too.

I've had a lot of local beers there. They have a lot of craft bars. And that's neat. When they serve you food on a piece of wood, I like that. There's a subreddit called r forward slash we want plates. They just post pictures of these bullshit trendy

restaurants that'll serve you mashed potatoes on a stone. Yeah. That's really good. How would you like your drink in a boot? The one not plate thing that I love is would you like to drink in a boot? The one like not plate thing that I love is when you go to good barbecue places and they just give you a big metal tray and you just pile everything on the crab legs too.

I like like with crab legs, like don't bother with a normal like nine inch round plate. Give me a fucking platter of that shit. We're about to get messy here. All I want is is that wax paper stuff under a pile of fucking crab legs and I want endless fucking butter and I want beer.

We're going to make this happen. I'm doing that next week, dude. I'm telling you. They're overnighted, but I'm going to order those gargantuan crab legs. I'm going to get like $280 for the crab legs and me and a couple ladies are going to really dig in. It's going to be great. I'm going to get like $280 for the crab legs. And me and a couple ladies are going to really dig in. It's going to be great.

I'm going to pop in. I'm just going to show you. I wouldn't mind. If you popped in, I would not be. He would eat all the crab legs. How fucking weird would that be if I just showed up? Dude, I wouldn't give a fuck. I swear to God, I wouldn't.

Oh, I know you wouldn't care. We'd have a fun time. But if I just showed up on the crab leg day as the ultimate mooch, it's like, ah, I paid $400 for a round-trip ticket to eat your crab legs. Dude, next week, if you're free one day, you want to come down, I'm going to order some giant crab legs. You let me know. I'll order two extra pounds. Hell yeah. But what about the extra 10 know. I'll order two extra pounds. What about the extra ten for me?

Yeah. Kyle, Taylor, Taylor, Kyle, you haven't met. I think there's a bigger concentration of a bigger ratio of meat to shell when you buy the gargantuan legs. It's like a hot dog.

On the inside of these legs, it's like a hot dog sized piece of meat that's a foot and a half long i'm not an expert in the crab but in lobster when they get really big like that they can get dry they can't better yeah well it's not that these are like just oddly big ones it's that kyle's buying king crab yeah whereas i usually get snow crab snow crab smaller and it's easier to break with your hands so crab is what i get spines on crab's smaller and it's easier to break with your hands. Snow crab is what I get. Spines on it. So you can't really break king crab with your hands. No one's mentioned red lobster.

I don't know if something's wrong with red lobster. It is. Yeah. It's a little tear. That's the waffle house of. I really like it. Seafood restaurants. I don't mind it.

The biscuits are fantastic. Are you talking about the actual chain? I thought you were talking. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right.

Right. Yeah. Lobster. And I usually get snow crab legs there. And they're fantastic. The biscuit things are great. The crab legs are great. The butter is great and never-ending.

It's all good. You guys might not know this. You can dip the biscuits in the butter and they just give you more butter. Yeah. I'm going to cook those biscuits. You can buy a box of those biscuits. And I'm gonna cook that with my crap. Oh yeah, I used to buy those.

They have kits at grocery stores where you can buy the cheddar biscuits with the Red, not Red Robin, Red Lobster logo on it. And I would buy them before and be like, oh, this is a neat little thing, make it in a bowl, put it in the oven and make it myself. And would like it would say like serves eight and i would go home that evening and like forego dinner and just like make three rounds of biscuits for myself and man that is a that that shit the next day after you eat nothing but butter biscuits from red lobster

that you make and it puts the tay amount of butter recommended, not the recipe amount when I have to melt some additional butter. It just smells like a butter biscuit. The same way the next day when you shit out White Castle. It just smells like White Castle. It doesn't even smell like the shit. I love crab. Crab's one of my favorite meals. I like all the

iterations of crab. I like crab linguine and crab everything. I'm really looking forward to this it's gonna be fucking great my mouth is frustrated maybe it's the king crab things i'm always frustrated at the amount of work versus food i get out of crab like unlike lobster lobster is easy like lobster you crack open a couple pieces you have this huge like claw the tail is a ton of meat there like crab it's like i feel like i'm fussing around for fucking nothing have you eaten at a place fancy enough where they crack it for you? For crap?

No. I was never going to crap out. Oh, yeah. I've eaten at fancy enough lobster places, and oh my gosh, they're excellent at it, and then you only get the good part, the eating. Yeah. Yeah, where they grab it and do the masterful twist, and they pull that giant hunk out.

They have a trick for every body part. They're amazing. They're professionals at it. That would be like a funny mad TV bit, where it like, instead of that, it's a guy who stands there and, like, quickly does the crab and, like, feeds you from everything from the water. Oh, I think it'd be funny if he were just incompetent. Where you got, like, half the tail out and was like, fuck it. That's all. I was thinking about getting the crab legs split already.

Like, you can get those. They're called gargantuan crab legs, I think. Gargantuan king crab legs. They're over a pound each. Like, you should get those split. A pound and a half. And you can order them split. So I may do that.

So they're already just cut in half, and you just get a little fork and go to town. Split or not, do make sure you've got the right utensils. My wife made crabs recently for us, and we and we're like sharing the cracker and the one tiny fork in the house. Yeah, and that weird plastic thing that's got like the scoop on one end and the grabber on the other. Ours is metal, but yeah. We also had one of those.

So I would use it and then put it in between us. And she would use it and put it to her right. And I'm like, baby, that's not sharing. That's hoarding. I am the less stroud of getting crabs open without any tools. I don't need anything more than a regular fork, and I'm off to the races. Easy peasy.

Not me. We ended up having cheap Chinese scissors that were our go-to tool. Like, you know what? These cuts, these... And then it's just great. They make these shears that look like pruning shears i i if i if i do that i'm going to order some of the shears i'm going to order a couple of the little scoopy weird things and uh some of the crackers oh i'm getting hungry that sounds so good i grew up in the northeast i kind of know my like

i'm knowing my way around a lobster and then i went out to hawaii and i had hawaiian spiny lobster and that fucked me up like all the ways because Because all the ways I'd normally break open a lobster and they have giant pokey fucking spines in those locations. And I'm like, man, this got a lot less fun. I didn't even... I didn't know that was a thing. Taylor, you haven't been playing lobster on veteran mode. You should give it a try.

I've had blue lobster before. That was absolutely amazing. i i love seafood yeah i didn't know i guess they do sell it i always hear like this is a one of the trillion lobster somehow i didn't i thought it belonged in a museum no that was part of the sales pitch they're like i don't remember the number but they were like this is a one in one million lobster a one in five million lobster i was exaggerating yeah no it really is like well not a trillion though i hear you but it was like oh yeah it's 125 you sure you want it well how much does it weigh five pounds yeah yeah we want it yeah we'll split it yeah absolutely it's

fucking tasty whatever lobster is not as good as crab lobster is not as good as crab uh like like snow crab legs can crab it's a sweeter more delicious meat and like uh you know those long chunks of it i love lobster i mean i love crab i'm gonna get after it this week uh i'm very excited lobster meat is not as good but the work is not as much that's true lobster is the getter's shellfish i like this conversation more last time you guys tried to get me to weigh in on which i would rather fuck of like these huge massive like women or like men who are like more attractive to them give us time yeah like this isn't much this conversation is much more interesting to me like i'm getting hungry on this one the last one would you rather fuck a crab or a

lobster yeah i'm even okay with that like that seems like a natural kind of like neither of them are consenting yeah Yeah, it's harder. I mean, all the spines really get in the way. I'm going to try and fuck it with my dick. I don't even know what a lobster pussy looks like. You're going to insert the crab into yourself. That's the only way to effectively... That's why you got to get the king crab

with the long, reaching claw. That's a special tool for that. Can we do ads and then watch my video? Yes. Yeah, I can do that. I got to pee real bad. It's 2019.

Are you still doing things the old way at work? Start the year off right by replacing that software that causes you angst and agony every day and find software that fits your business needs using capterra.com. Capterra is the leading free online resource to help you find the best software solution for your business.

With over 700,000 reviews of products with real software users, it has everything you need to make an informed decision. Search more than 700 specific categories of software, everything from project management to email marketing to yoga studio management software.

No matter what kind of software your business needs, Capterra makes it easy to discover the right solution fast. Join the millions of people who use Capterra every month to find the right tools for their business. You can visit capterra.com slash pka for free today and find the right tools to make 2019 the year for your business. Capterra.com slash pka. Capterra, that's C-A-P-T-E-R-R-A.com slash P-K-A. Yeah, definitely do that because when you've got the right software, you'll find all your business solution needs.

I like that they left me alone and trusted me not to start pushing my agenda for world domination or some sort of radical, crazy, racist thing. You know, I could do anything right now. Oh, God, the power I'm feeling. It's the Kyle show. It's the Lyle show. Let's talk about Lumi, okay, because you guys seem to take me very seriously

when I was talking about Lumi. Some of you did. Some of you got that it was a bit of a troll. Oh, Filthy's back. We'll keep going because Filthy doesn't have any say-so in what I can and can't say. Look, Loomy is a sexy man, okay? You guys need to be hooking that up for me like you did with Sarah XXX, okay? You guys are my secret weapon when it comes to getting after that sweet, sweet boy pussy, all right?

So get in there and make it happen for your boy Kyle. All right? Whose boy pussy are you after? Disregard! Disregard whatever you may have heard. And smartmouth.com. Bad breath is a gross, embarrassing problem that impacts everyone at some point in their lives.

Fortunately, it isn't your fault. Taylor knows this better than anyone. Smartmouth Mouthwash knows that the real cause, they know the real cause of bad breath and how just two rinses a day can solve it for good. But first, what is bad breath? Bad breath is a natural consequence of bacteria living in your mouth. Naturally, according to oral bacteria, consume protein in your mouth and give off sulfur gas as waste. So when you smell that rotten egg bad breath odor, you're actually smelling sulfur gas is waste. So when you smell that rotten egg, bad breath odor, you're actually

smelling sulfur gas. Using alcohol to just kill those germs or trying to cover it up with a minty mask will not solve that problem. To solve a real problem, you need real science. SmartMouth uses a clinically proven, patented, two-liquid system. When poured, the clear sulfur-eliminating solution combines with the green zinc ion solution and activates. The activated zinc ions seek out and bind to bacteria in your mouth, stopping them from being able to consume protein or release that sulfur gas for 12 hours per rinse. No sulfur gas, well, that means no bad breath. You can find SmartMouth in the oral health aisle at your favorite supermarket,

pharmacy, grocery store, or online. That's where I get it, at Amazon. Now, for a limited time, you can go on over to smartmouth.com. This is where we want you to go. This is what makes us look good. This is what keeps us in Mustang GTs. This is what

makes wings cry tears of butter, okay? Because he couldn't show up for his damn job. Because that's what happens. He'd sleep in, he'd make excuses? Because he couldn't show up for his damn job. Because that's what happened. He'd sleep in, he'd make excuses, and he wouldn't show up. Nobody needs to kiss my ass except for Mrs. Kyle, okay? She does the ass kissing.

I don't need anybody to kiss my ass. I don't care for it, alright? You lick it. Stick your tongue right up in there. I don't care. SmartRef.com slash PKA. You're going to need it after servicing Kyle. You can get 20% off your SmartMath mouthwash or toothpaste. You're going to want to double up after this trip. Get your code PKPromo and check out for 20% off your purchase.

SmartMath.com. P-K-A. Code P-K-A. Promo. Make it happen. People make us regret it. If you want me to rent a GT Mustang and do a photo shoot, you have to go to smartmout.com

slash pka and then make your own website on Squarespace. Let me find out how much it costs. I'm going to go to turo.com right now. And go to turo.com. Did we do the Turo mid-roll while I was away? We have not done the Turo. That's the only one

remaining as far as mid-rolls go. I'll crank that. But we're 4 for 4 with oururo. That's the only one remaining as far as mid-rolls go. So I'll crank that. But we're four for four with our advertisements. There's five total. Well, obviously the service I'll use is Turo. So you're in St. Louis. It seems to be the premium. He's looking for a GT rental.

I bet it's cheap. I want to throw a number out. You can do the read. I'll type it up and look. Turo.com. Oh, no. I'm not going to do the read. I'll do the read in look. Turo.com. I'm not going to do the read. I'll do the read in another 45 minutes or so.

I was going to try to find a Mustang for you. Turo St. Louis. I think that would be good. That's really going to help the guys doing these videos if they have some footage of you actually in one, Diller. I know. I'm a big pull the guys doing these videos if they have some like footage of you actually in one tiller i i know

i'm a big pull in the gearhead community if you could rent an owl as well to be yeah that'd be a little redundant maybe but yeah i mean turro i i'm the i'm the voice you need for the auto industry i know all sorts of car words transmission rear wheel drive petrol uh the bonnet uh the autobahn the list goes on their carriage the undercarriage voxel i'm just naming things i remember from top gear damn it there's not a uh there's not a ford mustang Oh, wait, maybe. Such a great show, by the way, Top Gear. No, no Ford Mustang in St. Louis.

Unfortunately. I'll search a bit later. If not, I can go pretend to be interested in a Stingray Corvette. A Stingray Corvette would get the same job done. $330 a day. Make that shit happen. What does a Stingray Corvette mean?

Is that like a special upper echelon yeah it's a nice version i gotta sorry what's that filthy i ate stingray the other day how was it i've never had that really weird it's got a middle like like bony platey thing and it has meat on either side and you kind of take it off with a fork because it has these weirdly weird like ribbed bones on them almost that you got to pull the meat off of. It was really good, but it was really strange. Was there much meat on it? Yeah, a ton of meat on it.

I was really surprised. How did it do with your hands? How big was this? It's hard to see with the various things you need like proportion. I don't know. It was like a chunk of meat like that maybe. Okay.

It's interesting to me that Taylor is so not a car guy that we found a Corvette Stingray for him to actually drive in real life for fun. And he wants to talk about the fish. Yeah. He's just like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Show me with your hands how big the Stingray was.

My wife's the car guy in my relationship too. How many seasonings did they use? Yeah, I just don't know. This looks fun to drive. I don't even know how to tell that. How does it look fun to drive? I just mean it would look fun to drive in an area where I could see how fast it would go

because I've never really driven a super fast car. But I wouldn't feel comfortable going really fast on the road in that. Yeah, you'd probably drive 65 in a 65 in that. And then you'd be like, why the fuck did I i buy this car but you could go to 65 quickly what i want is the i want the tesla i want the self-driving that's what i want i want to take the driving out of the driving experience so i've i heard how good they were driving right so taking a step back i I came from a 15-year-old Tacoma, so of course it didn't have anything like that. And I get this F-150 with like a lane assist.

You're probably familiar with that. When you shift over, it just steers you back into the middle. Also, and that is like semi-reliable. And the cruise control slows down when you catch up to the car in front of you. And that thing is really reliable. Like you could. That's pretty good. That is trustworthy.

I've heard that a Tesla is about as good a driver as someone you're teaching. And that like clicked with me. They're like, yeah, they'll do 95% of the stuff right. You know, just every once in a while, like it'll steer onto the exit and go to the other highway. Like it'll take your exit based on GPS, follow around the exit and go to the other highway. It'll take your exit

based on GPS, follow around the curve, and go onto the next highway. You don't have to do anything. It's as good as a teenager at driving. That's really cool. But also, if starting tomorrow, everybody's driving skill reverted back to their teenage driving skill,

you would get in horrible accidents. I thought the safety record for those was pretty damn good oh i know i was talking about like because there are so few teslas and most people are driving autonomously like or not or i mean on their own volition on what you would say but like so if there's a bunch like a handful of cars out there driving at a 16 year old level you're fine but if everybody tomorrow was in something that was driving at a 16 year old level like it would be carnage you know so elon musk has an interesting thing going on in that he can over promise under deliver and his customers are happy right yeah he said

this year 2019 right he's got 10 months left You'll be able to safely sleep while you're driving. God, I want that so bad. That just can't be true. That sounds great. But they sold as a $5,000 option this level of self-driving like three years ago. And they still haven't delivered. If Ford sold a $5,000 option that like for a good chunk of the life of your car you didn't actually have,

they'd be very mad at Ford. But in the Tesla world, they're just happy that people are trying to do something great. I'm a pretty big Elon Musk fanboy. Yeah, me too. What's the coolest thing he's doing right now? Tesla is neat.

Fucking SpaceX. Fucking SpaceX. SpaceX is cool. What else is he doing? SpaceX's goal is to put a city on mars that's the long-term goal that they're working toward for from the beginning using dude with a goal like that you could like i think this is kind of like what woody's point was is he's putting he's setting these benchmarks at like we want to put a city on mars and then with like a benchmark that high

and with it anticipating in like knowing that like the timeline of this is not in any of our lifetime it doesn't really hold we're gonna put a city on Mars in the next seven years and we already have our rockets not crashing some of the time Jesus but tell me that lie as opposed to unfund NASA

and never put people like never have a government program to go back into space tell me I i'm more to what he's done is a story to tell me in my life than we've given up on the idea of leaving this planet i say we get rid of nasa entirely invest in cow dung as fuel there's lots of that and let's let's let's add that to the the second part of that which is we are just going to deny global warming as a thing and then just like be like yeah we're not gonna we're not gonna discuss our future at all and we're gonna pretend that everything's fine here like tell me something if you want to sell me a lie like not 20 minutes ago you said it was cold out yeah hypocrite the only thing about like gotcha is we need we need to

seriously we need to allow global warming to continue unabated for another 12, 15 years or so until everywhere's kind of like LA. Then we stop it. We don't want to jump the gun here and stop it while there's still shitty weather in place. No, what Elon Musk has already done with SpaceX is incredible. It's something

that NASA, with all of their billions of government funding, could never do. And it's the reusable rockets. Like the space shuttle kind of? I guess in fairness, they didn't reuse the rockets. No, because they threw those rockets away every time, and it was an incredible cost. There was a lot of reused stuff, though.

No, the expensive part was not reused. The space shuttle itself, sure, it came back down. I bet that was expensive. Didn't they just let shit just fall into the ocean and sink? What he's done, and it's doubly important because everybody's like, oh, well, it's incredibly important for this to be financially feasible, that the rockets come down with retrograde rockets themselves and land in place. Yeah, that's important for financial feasibility, but what it's really important for is landing on Mars because Mars' atmosphere is so thin that parachutes don't work. Parachutes are not going to slow human beings down well enough for them to make a landing. You have to have retrograde rockets firing straight down as you're coming down and land

your vehicle vertically for Mars to work, for you to put human beings on Mars without them dying on landing. So to add to what Kyle's saying, what they use is a combination of parachutes and airbags. But like Kyle said, that's not cool if you want humans on board. Yeah, that's for landing those. If you have if you have GoPros on board, you're OK because they can take some G's. They can take 15 G's. Yeah, but Billy is going to get squished.

His his his brain's going to explode. He's going to have an aneurysm and he's going to be dead on the surface of the red planet. I really hope they go to Mars eventually. It's going to be such a cool undertaking. I've watched a lot of shows about that. I hope we get to see it. We absolutely will get to see it. Is they going to do a practice run on the moon?

Maybe? Yeah. Did he say that? Do you know? NASA is talking about going back to the moon and building a base. The most feasible way to do continuous travel to Mars, because what you want to do first is send supplies there. You'd want to land supplies on Mars

and know that, alright, if we get this six-man crew there, this shit's there waiting for them. We know they're safe, right? Robots have already built a habitation ring. They've already built a habitation ring they've already built the generators they've already put up the solar panels we just need to get the people there and the food and supplies and energy are waiting on them so they'll do that first but what

would make it even more cramptly the crab you need so much crap there's no crab on mars i know you're gonna have to ship all that in so that's's got to get there ahead of time. I feel like if I was in charge of a Mars colony, I'd be like, all right, first order of business. We're going to need to stockpile about three years of proof of life so that if this doesn't go right, we can lie to people for quite some time. Yeah, I'm watching this show. I actually finished it.

It's called Mars. It's on Netflix. And it's this weird... Oh, is that the one where it's like a it's on netflix and it's this weird oh is that the one that's like a splash of like like actual like reality stuff and then like the hyper like yeah like yeah i couldn't get into that i watched a little bit of that i couldn't get through it i had a hard time getting into it i'll be honest is it plot driven or a documentary kind of thing so here's both it's both and it's odd so what it does is you've got this this mission in like the year 2035 where like it's happening a pro like a

bunch of nations have come together to create the like international mars research foundation or something like that they've built a ship and they're sending i think six astronauts to mars and what they'll do is they'll they'll stop and and the screen will go 2016 and they'll do is they'll stop and the screen will go 2016. And they'll show you what's happening right now, or like two years ago rather, with like Elon Musk. Elon Musk is in the documentary. It's like him failing at his first rocket. And they'll like- Is it two or three?

They failed a couple of times. It's two or three. And then they'll have like Neil deGgrice tyson or they'll have a lot of intellectuals they'll be like the thing about mars is you have to do this this and that because of this this and that and then they'll go forward to 2035 and the solution has been found you know and they bounce around between this fictional like scripted 2035 mars mission and something to go wrong and then they take you all the way back to 2015 or 2016 where the groundwork was being laid.

Or they'll show you Scott Kelly spending a year in space after the big Obama speech several years back. And they'll show you Apollo programs and stuff like that. And then you'll be like well, fuck! Get me back to 2035! I want to see them

land! It's funny, I have the exact opposite, Kyle. I was like, get me back to 2035 i want to see them land so it's funny that i have the exact opposite kyle i was like get me back to fucking 2016 i i'm all about the sci-fi i love the sci-fi but if we're talking like something as cool as fucking spacex where this is actually the possibility of doing this i'm more interested than that than i am in like the fictional depiction of the 2035 for that is space force a thing thing? Yeah, it's becoming a thing. Does anyone work? Is there even a single employee yet? That's crazy. It almost seems like another military branch to

funnel money into. That isn't necessary at all. If you want it to happen, make it military. We need to have a Space Force. People are going to have rockets on their shoes and lasers. It's going to be very, very cool. This is just another fucking boondoggle force it's gonna their people are gonna have rockets on their shoes and lasers it's gonna be very very cool it's like we actually just another fucking boondoggle to to pump tax dollars into

whatever i i but but yeah it i i i would pick up as a series cow is any better after one season um i i wouldn't say i hated it i liked it i watched the whole thing i watched all of it i would give it like two and a half out of five stars though you know it was kind of it's kind of low budget in some ways but but what was most interesting to me is is the way they showed actual science working on mars because the thing is it won't work like in the martian like the the matt damon movie you can't just live on the surface because the thing is it won't work like in the Martian the Matt Damon movie you can't just live on the surface because of the radiation you gotta go underground

and so the plan right now with NASA and SpaceX is to find these lava tubes which are basically these underground caverns and you go down in that cavern with stone above you and you'd inflate this big habitation bubble and then you'd go down in that cavern with, with stone above you and you'd inflate this big habitation bubble.

And then you'd build onto it with like hallways and another bubble and hallways and another bubble. What is this bubble? Like, what do you mean? Like, like, like,

like see glass or some shit, like a, a biodome that you're making. Sort of like that. This is what the Viagra is for. He's testing bubble material. He's been doing it for years now. Yeah.

It's giant condoms on Mars. It's some sort of inflated solution. I don't know what condoms on mars and it's some sort of inflated solution i don't know what it's made of it's some sort of inflated material it's to create the habitation bubble first you find a tunnel uh you but they do that real good but you know they do that in the show they like they go down in the lava tube they get it all cranking they've got greenhouses up and like time slowly moves forward and the six-man crew grows to a ten-man crew, which grows to a thirty-man crew. And they're landing more and more people there and everybody has jobs

and there's a command structure. They're trying to get more and more electricity so they have more and more greenhouses and the goal is to become self-sufficient. I don't think that first quote-unquote city is going to be a city. I think it's going to be more like a military outpost, right? You know, they compare it a lot with what we have in Antarctica,

how we have that. There's a big city there. I can't think of the name of it, a town with several hundred people living there. But it's heavily reliant on shipping supplies down there every so often. You have to show up with a ship full of food, full of parts, and all of that stuff. And initially, that's how the base is on Mars. It's like, well, if Earth just cut us off, we'd starve to death, or we'd run out of energy, or we'd run out of this or that.

They've got 3D printers. They've got fission power cells, like nuclear fission power cells. They've got solar panels. But if Earth cut us off, it'd be GG. We'd just run out of food. And so initially, that's how it is. But slowly, they're trying to grow their own food in greenhouses and stuff like that. That sounds interesting.

It was interesting. Again, I'd give it a two and a half out of five stars. What I'd give about four stars is fucking season three of True Detective, though. I finished that up last night. I watched the final episode i cried yeah it's good i cried uh did you watch season three of the expanse kyle oh yeah i finished all that that was very good too i was surprised i didn't like season one of that season three was excellent i thought i like season one more than season three personally

because i like the the ground laying of the world and i liked that um oh the one guy the detective who's always slicking his hair back i liked him or something miller yeah i like that actor a lot but but i like the series as a whole and i'm looking forward to more of it yeah me too i was glad i got picked up so yeah we'll see if it stays good it's that middle ground between you know star trek which i love i've seen everything that's ever been Star Trek. I love it. Deep Space Nine, all that shit. I've seen every episode many, many times. But it's the year 2300.

It's somewhere in there. And they've mastered this space thing. Transporters and warp technology. It's like, ah, well, any problem can be solved with a little time. But this is that weird middle ground. Not too far away from where we are now but far enough that it's like space has been it's like the wild west but it's

not like some terrifying experiment anymore and and it's fun to watch that it's like i see firefly for that reason yeah yeah firefly is a not the show's low budget but the people in the show are low budget right you know if the star trek enterprise saw the firefly ship they would just ignore it and keep going you know because there are good ships in that universe but they didn't that that's not the one we're following we're following like a junk hauler and uh and it's neat to see their adventures you don't have to be the most powerful ship in the universe to make a good show that's We're following like a junk hauler, and it's neat to see their adventures. You don't have to be the most powerful ship in the universe to make a good show. That's what Star Trek usually is.

A lot of times, yeah. Star Trek is usually the most powerful ship. Most of the time. Yeah, the Enterprise is the flagship of the Federation. They're the flagship of the most powerful group of beings that we kind of know of. Then we meet the Borg and they're probably better but they eventually lose. In Star Wars they always played up like

oh Han your ship sucks dick. This is the worst. And then like the function of a ship to go very very fast seems like he actually had a really good ship right? Star Wars is fucking lame as shit. Star Wars is fucking stupid, man.

I hate Star Wars so much. I mean, I'm not that passionate, but I watch it often. I fucking hate it. I like them all. I hate it so much. And I wonder, Kyle, if you could do a little introspection for a moment.

Is it possible that the reason you just like Star Wars is because you walk into the app looking for a five and then you only see a four? I think it's just awful. Like the new ones, I hate the social justice warrior stuff. They cram down your throat. I hate all the... What social justice warrior stuff? I might just be less sensitive

to it. I mean, we could spend an hour on it. Just because the main character is a girl? How many have there been in the recent couple years? There were the three originals, the three in the early 2000s, and then how many have there been now? They've made two more, plus a Han Solo movie. Okay, so I've only seen the original six.

Oh, wow. They've done four more. There's like 12 or something like that now. There's the original six, plus there's two more that are continuing on with their storyline. The Han Solo movie, and then the movie where the rebels go

and get the plans for the Death Star. You were saying why you hated the new ones? They were just shit? Look, there's never been a good Star Wars movie. Just to be clear. They're all bad. They're all terrible, hammy acting. They're all bad special effects

by modern standards. The plot lines don't make any sense. The villains don't make any sense. They've gone back and forth so much that they can't decide. The prequels are just garbage. When you look at characters like Jar Jar Binks, when you look at how the battles are fought.

The pod racing was cool. That's my least favorite moment in the whole thing. I saw it when I was 12. It pod racing was cool. I hated the pod racing. That's my least favorite moment in the whole thing. I saw it when I was like 12, so I was like, this is a joke. It was perfect for you, yeah. No, I really hate Star Wars, and I've tried to give it a

chance. And look, I bet if you gave J.J. Abrams Star Wars and let him start from scratch, he'd probably make a good fucking Star Wars movie. Am I crazy or did he do Star Wars? He's like Coen Brothers Star Wars. It'll be gritty and dark. Didn't J.J. Abrams do the first one back? I think he may have directed one of them or something like that,

but he needs to get his own writing team. The story is bad. The story is stupid. The Star Trek movies are pretty fucking shit. I always have my frustration. Some of the Star Trek movies are shit. The good Star Trek movies are Star Trek II, The Wrath of Khan, Star Trek VI,

The Undiscovered Country. As far as Next Generation, First Contact is pretty good. Most of the others are bad. The 2009 Star Trek is a very good movie. Into Darkness is a pretty damn good movie. The third Star Trek reboot movie that came out a couple years ago where he's riding a BMX motorcycle or something on a planet.

And we're fighting Idris Elba in a mining ship is garbage. It's such a fucking slap in the face. It's such bullshit. Bad. It doesn't make any sense. They're doing things that make no sense. They're doing things that make no fucking sense. Dude, that's what I like about Star Trek. Star Trek is this, like, it's a universe where knowledge of climbing in extreme sports is essential to problem solving.

Like, oh, no, we're captured by super bad guys. Fortunately, we have, like, a BMX bike here and some rocket boots. And we're going to be doing, like, free, like, wingsuiting. I was cringing so much the whole time i was like this is just fucking stupid even the first one remember the opening scene of the reboot what's the name of the you know with the spock 2009 star trek i think the opening scene of that they're like uh base jumping to deal with some sort of drilling laser beam into the middle of a planet.

Not the opening scene, but the eighth scene or something like that. Yeah, yeah. It's not the opening. Once the show gets started. It's great. Yeah, I was fine with that. I was fine with them base jumping because they explained why. Transporters are down. Shuttle craft cannot make it through the atmosphere.

We've got to fucking jump. There were no transporters when they grabbed the motorcycle and started jumping things. They transported the motorcycle in. That was part of the madness! Yeah, you're probably right. But it's still awesome. Kyle has clearly fucking encyclopedic knowledge of this. Of everything he sees!

Kyle has not a photographic memory, a videographic memory. And he can just retell movies and things better than anyone else I know. I found myself not super thrilled about those movies but I am hesitant to touch this one because I didn't like Star Wars movies either.

I didn't really like Star Trek movies but now when you're citing names and dates and storylines of them, I'm like, fuck, I just remember just a general, like, damn, that sucked. That's how I am with movies. I just remember like, oh, that one? Bad. I'll be like, well, 33 minutes in when that minor character

Steve came in, he was wearing a watch and this is set in 13th century Scotland. There's good Star Trek content. Let me hit it. There's great Star Trek content. If you watch Deep Space Nine, it's the best. I've only ever watched a couple episodes of that. Give it a chance. I promise. It's some of the best TV ever made.

I think it takes a little while to warm up. By season two, you're loving it. As soon as you see Cisco shave his head and grow a goatee, it's go time. I remember it being three or seven. It's like the echelon of Star Wars movies. You put the original three from the 70s and early 80s.

They're really bad. Then the three in the 2000s and then the ones now are the worst they're all garbage i can't watch a single star the best star wars movie was the one what the most the recent one where there was like a prequel for the rebels go and uh everybody dies at the end i can't think of the name of it that's the best star wars movie ever made that was pretty decent because there was – Well, I think they're children's movies, right? So again, like that's – I have a little bit of this issue with Star Trek because Star Trek is like – it's like the goody two-shoe like – how do I say it? It's so clean in a way that doesn't reflect reality that I really dislike about it.

Like I understand it's science fiction. Not always. I like like Star Trek. I understand it's science fiction. Not always. Star Trek? Yeah. Like, in particular, I'm thinking of Sisko killing a bunch of Maquis just to show what a fucking badass he is.

Is this Deep Space Nine? Because I haven't seen a lot of that. Yeah, it is Deep Space Nine. There's an episode where he didn't kill them. I'll try that. Yes, he did. No, sit back, filthy. You're about to get the whole rundown. So he didn't kill them.

But what he did, there's this Maquis general, and he's like surrender to me or i'm going to destroy that planet that you're living on right now and make it uninhabitable and he's like i'm calling your bluff mr siskin he's like mr wolf lord the torpedoes and he's like yes captain because we're to give a fuck he'll kill some people fire and the guy's like what the fuck did you just do he's like now that planet will be uninhabitable for the next 10 years. And he's like, I can't believe you've done that. There are 18 more Maquis planets in this sector. Mr. Worf, load four more torpedoes.

And he's like, yes, sir. And the guy's like, all right. All right, god damn it. If you're going to be nuking planets, I'll surrender and do whatever you want. He's like, that's right, you bitch. Like, he doesn't give a fuck. He's hard fucking core. Deep Space Nine is excellent.

It's the best TV show ever made. Star Trek II, The Wrath of Khan is a real good TV show. It's gritty. It's hard. They kill a lot of main characters. A lot of shit's going down. Kyle, I might have taken this with a grain of salt until one of the times on PKk you recommended a reddit sub forum which is like

uh the 411 of like porn and ever since this recommendation i've been forced forced to take your recommendation with a grain of salt i am actually probably gonna have to look up deep space nine after this i i promise you do you will love deep space 9 if you give it a chance like like it's not a bunch of like ridiculous like i find it on netflix do you know yeah oh yeah it's all on netflix all right there's powerful acting and and like there's character development how associated with our trick deep space 9 was like in the late uh 90s okay so not that old yeah it's not that old the special effects stand up. A couple of interesting things about it.

There's a war. Like a war that involves all of the main players that you're familiar with in Star Trek. Not that you are familiar with them, but you get what I'm saying. That goes on for years. That goes on for multiple seasons.

They are fighting these aliens that are from a whole other side of the galaxy, they're losing and they're getting asses kicked and main characters are dying and and and like hard decisions are made like in more like it's like you know this group over here doesn't want to join the war with us you know it's kind of like world war ii or something like that like we're gonna have to make a false flag to drag the fucking Americans in this scenario into the war. And there's this real big moral quandary with the main character where he's like,

are we going to kill people and frame people up to drag the Americans into this war so that billions and billions don't die? And the answer ends up being yes. And it's great. It's a super powerful episode. There's lots of them like that.

It's real good. Good acting. Character development is important for me in those series. Because I watch like Voyager or Star Trek The Next Generation. Voyager is so bad, man. There's an episode of Voyager where like the captain and Tom Paris both get like reverse evolved. Like devolved into lizards, and they fuck,

and they make lizard babies. The next episode... That's already happening in China. The next episode, they act like it's no big deal. Taylor, if you and I get devolved and make lizard babies together, we're never going to be the same again. We're just going to be sitting around

like... You think it was the crab legs that caused that? I'd be like, well, at least I was the boy. Exactly. Just shut up. Just shut up. You promised you'd never bring that up. We promised we'd never call anyone that you were the boy lizard.

You know? It would shatter us. It would break us. And that happens a lot. Or maybe we'd become gay. Maybe we would. But then the next episode, they're all fine. They're all fine the next episode.

In Deep Space Nine, a character's wife dies, right? We can all imagine what it's like to lose your wife. It'd be a shattering experience. He's fucked up for a year. A year later, he's later, he's crying and upset because in his religion, she doesn't get to go to the afterlife because her death wasn't heroic enough. And he's like, the only way to get my dead wife into heaven is for us to go do some badass shit in her name. And I need all of her friends to join me

on this quest. We're gonna go in one ship and we're gonna destroy an entire enemy shipyard by blowing up a sun. And they're like, that'd get her into heaven. You're damn right it would. Let's go. And it's like, fuck yeah, they're gonna go

in one ship and blow up a star to destroy an entire enemy shipyard. To get his wife into some make-believe place. Let's go! Good show. Good show, Deep Space Nine. I looked up the thing about did he kill them. I saw two webpages, read them both, and they're still scrambling to evacuate.

So I don't have a clear answer. They got out. The colony of Maquis. Yeah, they were scrambling to evacuate when he poisoned the whole colony and Kyle and I interpreted it differently I need to watch the episode again yeah I promise you they get out yeah okay but I but I agree true detective was really good this season I thought I thought better than last season that black guy whose name I can't pronounce incredibly powerful actor, literally made me cry there at the end.

I won't spoil what his issue is. Were you excited about the ending of the season? No, I didn't want to. Don't spoil it, because I'm going to watch... Wait, wait. Tree Detective, I don't have to watch season two at all. No, they're unrelated. Okay, because season two sucked just a giant dick.

Yeah, yeah. It's quite good. I highly recommend season one of true detective it's excellent season two is very good uh it's definitely worth watching um i like the actors oh go ahead no no i guess i i guess i'm done i i felt like the that i didn't love the ending i didn't love the ending that was excellent but uh but but but i loved the story um and i loved like like trying to piece it together in my own head and the good thing about that show is at the end they're like here's what happened yeah i was glad to get the reveal as well because i i do sometimes my wife likes to watch a lot of

foreign films and she'll occasionally watch like french foreign films where they just love that their favorite ending is this makes absolutely no fucking sense whatsoever under any circumstance no one has any idea what happened credits enjoy the ambiguity exactly that and i'm so i hate that sentiment so much when i'm when i'm when i'm watching my fiction so i want to know that's how i felt about is it the end in uh that netflix thing where there was an armageddon and at the very end they drive away from a big The Earth is Ending. Oh yeah, the comedy movie where Michael Cera falls in the pit. Is that what you're talking about?

It's not. I think I might have the name of it wrong. It was a Netflix special. It's probably one year ago. They're in an apocalypse and they don't quite explain why they're in an apocalypse type situation. I'm not familiar. Is that when they're going to like, he's with his father-in-law going to sleep?

Yes, and they try to, I think, rendezvous with his wife or something and get things together. Yeah, it had Lazy Eye in it. Forrest Whitaker. Forrest Whitaker? Do you remember the name of that show? He always sounds like he's whispering

because he doesn't want anybody to notice. I thought it was quite bad. It wasn't for me. They didn't reveal what the scoop was they had some theories that a couple of them could have made sense and then it just i like i like i like nitty-gritty details and lore i like i like them to be like look even if it's the very end when you find out and you've spent six or twelve episodes speculating i like to be like well actually what happened was, this was the

Benovians. Dude. The Benovians have lived on Earth long ago. They evolved, left Earth before the meteorites that killed the dinosaurs could fall, and now they've come back to reclaim what is theirs. Alright! Sweet! That's a badass background!

Let's go! But if they're just like, it's some bad shit what kind of bad shit like how bad if you find yourself with audio time right like maybe you've got a long drive or something the three body problem that book that harley recommended us yeah oh the i gotta get on the universe building that goes on in the three body problem was compelling to me and i'm not a guy who normally has like patience for a slow burn you know sometimes i do but in in this one i definitely did slow chinese like chinese yeah yeah yeah okay yeah yeah chinese very chinese centric yeah yeah which was an issue

the um the guy that read the audiobook, I have a problem remembering names in general, but that's doubly true when their names are all like Zhu, Chu, and Sun. I get angry with authors who use the same first letter of main characters. They should never have the same fucking

first letter. We talked about Sauron and Saruman in Lord of the Rings not long ago. The guy did his voices so well. I instantly knew who we were throughout the whole thing and that was my personal trigger. Yeah. Yeah, three body problem is a universe.

Woody, there is some incredible entertainment coming this Saturday night. There is a UFC card that's top five UFC cards of all time. It's shaping up that way, I think. I think it's going to be one of the best. It's got so much star power.

Who are the big two heavy hitters that are coming in? John Jones. Jones and Woodley. Of course. Tyron Woodley is going to be fighting. Cody Garbrandt's on that card. Let's go Woodley. Ben Askren, you're looking for.

But also Ben Askren and Robbie Lawler. I am really fascinated on that card. Let's go Woodley. Ben Askren you're looking for. But also Ben Askren and Robbie Lawler. I am really fascinated with that storyline. So one of the things, in case you don't know, Ben Askren and Tyron Woodley are training together and their opponents

Robbie Lawler and that Anthony guy or Robbie Lawler You're thinking guy you're thinking of Jones' guy their opponents are training together too so Askren and Woodley are training together and their opponents their respective opponents are also

training together who is Woodley fighting Woodley's fighting this guy with an African sounding name I just looked it up and forgot Uzman maybe? yeah yeah that's it Woodley fighting. Woodley's fighting... This guy with an African-sounding name. I just looked it up and forgot. Oh, Uzman, maybe? Yeah, yeah, that's it.

Kamara Uzman. Yeah, they're training together. So it's almost like these little duos are getting ready to fight against each other. That's cool to me, I guess. It's an interesting storyline. But every fight on that card really fascinates me, except for the girls.

I don't know the girls. Chiz and I were having to Google them. Tisha Torres won the ultimate. I think I'm mixing her up. I called her the cookie monster, and that was someone else, and I messed it up. This guy having an African name reminded me. I was laughing the other day thinking about a game show in Africa and Nigeria, and it's called Today, Welcome Once Again to Meal or No Meal.

And it's called today. Welcome once again to meal or no meal Apparently come on now the bank is offering two cups of dirty water Will you take meal or no? But I will say goomba says you will not take the two cups of dirty water back. No, no beer roll the fucking wheels. I am so sorry. You have ended up with case number four. You have seven living beetles. You are so close to the TGI Friday's gift card.

Tune in next time for meal or no meal. On the UFC card, did you see that John Jones failed two more steroid tests? No, he's not failing. You can set your watch by that guy. He's just alternative passing. You got a few picograms in there.

You don't like it? You go fucking watch one championship or whatever. This is what we do in the big leagues, okay? No. All right? So Filthy might not know. John Jones got busted for steroids twice and then the third time he got tested positive for steroids they're like you know what

i think what's happening here is the old steroids are coming back every so often so he passes and fails tests like you know sometimes he's hot sometimes he's cold he's not testing positive for yeah he doesn't test positive for steroids. He tests positive for the effects of long-term... The metabolites. The metabolites. Like his body's reacting in a way because it did steroids a long time ago and they already punished him once for those steroids.

But that's how he... Do those things just continue for the rest of your life if you use steroids or is it only happening... You keep taking them, yeah. If you keep taking them, yeah. I like Filthy's answer. So the science doesn't really fit on this. Like because these are illegal drugs,

there aren't a lot of studies that sort of determine what happens. And there are some people who say, yeah, there's a pulsing effect and you just go positive, negative, positive, negative until it wears out. And there are other guys who are like, dude, one time a different drug had a pulsing effect for 18 months why is it this drug is pulsing years later and it doesn't it's not even the one that we know later it is it's it's not come on it was just it was just like a couple years I stand corrected. So it depends on what you – Kyle likes Jon Jones, and I think he'd like Jon Jones if he was actually on steroids.

He's the best in the world. Oh, I don't give a fuck. I don't care. We should all be on steroids. You could lose a few pounds and you'd stop crying so much. He was more of a man. He's the heavyweight champion in the world um yeah okay let's we'll see uh but john jones is good but he's on steroids so i don't know

how to rank him exactly it makes it tricky for me he's enhanced best in the world uh that that's that that's probably the best way to rank him since he's never ever lost a fight ever oh matt hamill beat his ass yeah how can you forget matt hamill yeah retard the referee decided following this i'm pretty sure you're talking about that time the referee decided that john jones elbow came down at the wrong angle and disqualified him right you know there's lots of ways to win a fight that was a textbook dirty elbow i like to believe that matt hamill's going around doing clinics, like teaching MMA. I defeated the greatest fighter who's ever fought in the game. Let me tell you how you do it. You wait until he messes up and his elbow comes down at a 12 to 6 angle instead of an 11 to 5 angle.

And that's GG all she wrote. Yeah. There's a lot of ways to beat Jon Jones. I will teach you the tools and techniques to channel an elbow at a 12 to 6. First, you want to let him get you down so that you're in a terribly compromised position. And he's raining down on you. Imagine being completely mounted, pressed up against the fence so you can't escape. And then he elbows you in the face incorrectly.

Winner, winner, chicken dinner right this guy yeah it's like that mighty ducks thing like when gordon bombay is like what do we do take the fall get indignant uh but it's fun look jones is gonna fight i think it's interesting when jones fights uh even though i don't like him i don't know how i feel about the yankees but i do feel this the playoffs are more interesting when Jones fights. Even though I don't like him, I don't know how I feel about the Yankees, but I do feel this, the playoffs are more interesting when the Yankees are in it. And I'll say this,

your boy DC is like, oh, my thumb hurts. My thumb hurts. Is that what hurts his thumb? I didn't know it was injury. Oh, my thumb. Remember Conor McGregor? I don't need a thumb to fight.

You know? Back when Conor fought, I love that about him. That's what you want out of a champion. That's what you want out of a champion. And Jon Jones is like, I'm looking to make up for lost time. I'm staying busy this year. I bet Jon Jones already fought once. This will be twice.

I bet he fights twice more. I bet he fights four fucking times this year. I would love that. I bet he fights one more time. I mean, it's fucking March and he's about to throw down. You think he's going to go nine months and only one more? I bet he goes twice. Six is normal.

That's pretty common for these fighters. It seems like... I would say every six months is normal. So if he were to fight six months after this, they're covered for the year. How many times have you had the option to be punched in the head? Oh, see, you're assuming that Jon Jones

is going to get touched in this fight. What's going to happen? Jon Jones is going to come out. How many times do you want to bang your elbow into some guy at a fucking... 12 to 6? You don't want to do it all this fight. What's going to happen? John Jones is going to come out. How many times do you want to bang your elbow into some guy at a fucking 12 to 6? You don't want to do it all the time. That's the biggest fear. John Jones' biggest fear is hurting his elbow

on this Anthony guy's face because he's got a big old bald melon. Dude, he better never, never try that move on me or he's leaving with a shattered elbow. He tries to elbow me. John Jones, if you see me in public and you try to elbow me, you're not going home in an ambulance because they don't take you home. But you'll need an ace bandage.

You're going to go to the hospital in an ambulance. Because your arm will be shattered. And Sean Racklin, if you're ever out in public and you see that happen, you put that on YouTube, I will watch that. Just so we're clear. You're going to Tag me in it. Yeah, so there's two championship fights going on. Robbie Lawler plays against Ben Askren.

It's really interesting. Ben Askren, best fighter never to fight in the UFC. That's about to change. And he's this wrestler guy. And Robbie Lawler and Ben Askren are almost perfectly wrong for each other. Like, I want to say they're each other's kryptonite style-wise. Robbie Lawler, he is a heavy hitter. So it's very dangerous if you're a grappler because you have to get past that punishment.

But Ben Askren is the greatest grappler. And I don't know that Robbie Lawler has an answer to it. Do you have an answer for that for me in general? Just for that? Like when we see these styles, do those styles tend to come out dead even? Or is there actually like one of these styles? Grappler. Grappler tends to get ahead.

The grappler tends to get ahead. It's just a little bit easier to get under a punch long enough to make that into a ground game. Punching someone like that is a more skillful technique than grabbing someone, right? Like if I asked you to punch this moving target perfectly at the right angle, it's real fucking hard. But I've asked you to like grab a guy and then work from there you know like like it's it's just easier to get from step zero to step one with the grappling game and once you've gotten to step two step three is almost a certainty and that's not always true with punching right like like maybe he eats your punch and he's able to

back up and he's and and you know he's able to stuff you i would have answered that it goes through waves in early ufc it was totally the grappler and it seemed like five years ago it was all about the striker you know like the mcgregor's the silvas you know like all our champions weren't grappling now it's um khabib uh like ben askren's getting all this press uh there's a gold medal wrestler that just beat uh dj and i mean that and that's how dc like like beat derrick lewis dc beat derrick lewis that way steep a beat ninganu that way and uh it just seems like grappling is the better thing now but i'd say it goes through waves the other thing is though if you have both skills like and of course they're all there at that level they all have they all have both skills though, if you have both skills, and of course they all need that.

They're all there at that level. They all have both skills. They all have both skills. But if your backup plan is better than his, that matters a lot. Because if all I can do is grapple and all you want to do is not grapple, it's really hard for me to get what I want. It seems like I have to be twice as good at takedowns as you are at takedown defense. So yeah, if the guy's whole plan revolves around denying you one thing,

he can usually deny one thing. Usually. I don't know. Unless it's Khabib. Unless it's Khabib. Khabib's coming for that ass. You know, you're going to need somebody to really crack Khabib to,

to make it, to make a difference. Like he's not, he's not, he's a human being. All you're going to need is somebody like to Khabib to make a difference. He's a human being. All you're going to need is somebody to fucking hit him. Isn't it interesting? These champions don't seem human until they do. And you never know when.

Jon Jones could lose to Anthony Smith who has 13 losses on his record. I'll bet whatever you want and give you virtually any odds. It's not happening. It's just not happening. And Tyron Woodley, by the same regard regard tyron woodley seems so into his craft and so all about work hard work and dedication and preparation and intelligence i don't see him losing anytime soon either those are two just givens to me they always always seem like that until they do. How much chances are in this game? Chances? There's a lot.

Like, yeah, no, I would say that it's not uncommon for, like, you know, whatever. This guy can win one time out of five, and then that happens, and they never run it back. Ben Askren's never lost a fight. John Jones never lost a fight. And he hasn't. mean i mean he hasn't habib he's never lost uh and you know you know if you ask me about like rose nama unisys fight in brazil i'm worried that could go either way you know there's some chance involved in that

fight because the mostly because of her fighting style she gets in there and fucking pans are flying you know like i don't know what it is about rose i never have any confidence in her and robert whittaker i always think like oh she was lucky to win that thank goodness she's just been lucky all the way to be in the world champion and then defending her belt she's the luckiest son of a gun out there and you know at some point it might be that she's good that's possible. But there are some champs where I just always feel like they're about to be dethroned. It's going to be tough to carry this conversation on with

Kyle gone, I think, Woody. I can nod a little bit if it helps. I know I built the idea of who you're talking about. This Saturday, I'm going to watch this vocal bar name that does it. Do you have a link or something? Do you want to watch a cow eat a chicken?

Sure. Watch a cow eat a chicken. It's linked right above the stingray. Why is that? Do I do I have the motivation of the cow? I feel like that's important. I didn't know cows ate meat. And that was what was so shocking to me.

I was I was explaining revenge based vegetarianism to a friend of mine have i told you about this no i haven't heard about revenge-based vegetarianism let's let's get that intro that seems important to this all right my wife my wife told me at one point this year she's like i think we're gonna try vegan i'm like i don't think we are so i'm now curious about this it goes like this i was working with a bunch of Indians. I was saying that it was humane to eat animals provided that you use the animal completely, right? You can't just eat like, I don't know, shark fin and throw the shark away.

That seems mean. But you just have to eat the entire thing. And they said, that's stupid. The shark or the cow or whatever doesn't really care what you did with it, only that you killed it. That's not where like conscience should come from. And they seem to have a point.

I couldn't justify or refute that. If you killed me, I don't feel better knowing that you used every finger and toenail for your death. I'm an organ donor. I'm happy. Whatever you do with the remains of my corpse, I don't really care. I can get that.

So I came up with my own moral code on eating, and it was essentially that I would eat things that would eat me given the opportunity. So some things are really straightforward. I would eat lions. I would eat crocodiles. I would eat, I don't know, some of the more common. Fish.

Fish are a good example. Even a goldfish, while small, given the opportunity, if he was large, he would gobble you up whole like you were anything else swimming around so by that logic cats on the menu yeah i would say that yeah but dog no no and cows no cows are huge but i think even if cows were they're already bigger stronger and faster than me i don't know if you've ever tried a lot of a lot of like bizarrely placed like respect to the animal like aren't we here because we're not cows we are better bigger along with that better bigger faster stronger comes some responsibility not to pick on things that would be kind to you aren't we aren't we here because we didn't have that i did this for about

a decade i don't do it anymore but i i honestly what what changed your mind what what what what walked you back what was the moment the truth is i wasn't that hardcore about it but my wife told me a long time well my wife told me that i wouldn't keep it up and that was all that it took so it really was revenge basically yeah right yeah she's like you'll give this up in a week and i'm like oh oh, you sealed that. Enjoy your 30s. There's no steak in this house. So anyway, and then I mentioned this to a friend of mine just recently, and he gave me this video. We're watching the cow chicken video.

If you guys want to queue up. I am ready. All right. Three, two, one, play. Okay. Ready, ready. Nom, nom, nom, nom. Kyle just ate a chicken, for those of you listening.

Ate it whole. Well, he didn't have a knife, nom. Kyle just ate a chicken, for those of you listening. Ate it whole. Well, he didn't have a knife and fork. Kyle, I feel like cows and chickens are both in your wheelhouse. Is this a thing? Oh, my God, I didn't share the video. All right, while we talk about this, I'm going to play it again for everybody. Yeah, play it again. It's not a full-size chicken. It's a chick.

But it really, he munches it up, no problem. That's probably what it is. Cows are picky eaters. This is the veal of the chicken world. What do we call a baby chicken to eat? A chick. Yeah, no, I understand that a baby chicken is called a chick, but surely when you're going to make it a fancy food,

you've got to call it something. Chick-eel. I don't know. I like chick-eel. Do they kill baby chickens to make chicken wings? I don't think so. Kyle, do cows do this? You've been around cows and chickens.

Cows are disgusting creatures, but I don't know if they do this. They're sweet, but they're very tasty. I've never seen that before. I've seen other animals eat a chick whole, like dogs. They'll just munch one up. It'll be gone. I've never seen a cow eat meat. I guess if they feed them their own brains for mad cow disease,

presumably they eat meat. Would that make a cow sick to eat meat just once like that, or would it be totally fine? I think it'd be fine. Totally fine, right? Why are you guys so sure that he's able to digest birds and stuff? He eats grass. they've got four stomachs but that's for grass okay but mad cow right part of this was feeding cows like basically

bits of other cows right which must mean they're eating meat which must mean they're able to do that without getting you know like sick from that i mean though mad cow disease sickness that happens to people too right like Cannibal civilizations will get crazy brain worms and shit and they'll go mad from eating people meat. I didn't know that. I'm almost positive I didn't make that up. There's like a 70-80%

chance I did make it up. The further away I get from my academic background, the more willing I am to accept something like that. You mean you didn't study that? That's pretty fucked up. Imagining being the chicken and this big lumbering cow comes along and just munches you up.

That's pretty fucked. I noticed that chicks didn't take evasive maneuvers at all. I probably wasn't expecting it. I almost said that's what it was like to live with the dinosaurs, as if that happened. Yeah. They often ate baby chickens. You mean the large carnivorous reptiles you're talking about?

Yes, but I believe that they didn't coexist with people. That's not true. How is that like living with this? I've lost the thread of commonality okay a cow bending over and eating a chicken hole would be much like living with a t-rex oh I see it would be parallel there

and Taylor you say dinosaurs and people live together oh yeah because what are crocodiles and alligators if not today's I was wondering where you were going with that they're crocodiles and alligators? If not today's. I was wondering where you were going with that. They're crocodiles and alligators. No, those are dinos, man. They've been around since before

fucking plants and shit, maybe. Same with sharks. Yeah, sharks have been around before trees. I saw a tweet about that. That's my favorite source so far. Trump said it. It was a tweet from an account like, cool animal shit.

I'm like, wow. I'm going to integrate this into my brain as fact. People are saying. The president of the United States of America has confirmed. We've got to stop everything until we can figure out why cows are eating chickens declare an emergency oh dude

so many stories have been going on that I haven't followed very much and I feel like they're taking precedence over the true biggest story in the world right now which is India and Pakistan seem like they're about to tip off and all these other stories in the news

are small potatoes compared to two countries with nuclear weapons potentially going at it like and I feel like I'm not hearing nearly enough about this I'm with you that's been hard to follow I read that they were like giving each other an out like like they're describing what happened in a way that would be tolerable. Like maybe I'd bomb your people. And then you say, oh, all they hit was an empty field. So we don't have to go to war over it. You know, just a little bit of lie. Pakistan shot down, or I think the Indians maybe shot down two Pakistani pilots or whatever and captured one.

Really? I heard both sides shot down a plane. Well, they gave their pilot back today well that's a good sign right yeah so it's because that would be like it's a good sign if you like boring news the boring ass news like that you're not a fan of global war that would cause like a global calamity like like fallout would be carried throughout so much of the world if they went at each other full force. I'm not sure everyone knows.

Both India and Pakistan are nuclear powers. They war all the time, I think. When's the last time they had a war? Since 1947, I think. 1947 or something. They've had continuous conflict. Yeah. On and off.

But it's a little hotter than normal right now. Taylor's not making something out of nothing. They're both regular powers. They hate each other. And then they're allies. Like India is kind of with the NATO people, and Pakistan's kind of with those other people. And yeah, it could be the kickoff to World War III.

Yeah. But I'm fine because I have guns. I'm glad you're on the same page page with that where it's like they're talking about like like cohen or north korea which north korea is a big deal but like they're talking about stuff that like dude two global superpowers are at each other's throats right now and that's like a tier two story are you shitting me like how is stuff not coming out about this all the time this is a big deal trump went to vietnam and left so i like war heroes that don't get captured i hope he's going over to like pakistan and being like

guys this is ridiculous settled out you've only been fighting for a few days i have no idea the history between you two days you both look the same to me i'm just trying to get that goddamn peace price. Just going from hot spot to hot spot looking for peace prizes. You're Muslims. You're Hindus. I don't even know what that means. They can't be that different. You like to eat cows.

You don't. Give them your cows, and they'll give you whatever it is you people like to eat. Celery. Perfect. Yes. Celery and some kind of beads. You give them cows, they'll give you naan.

Yeah. That naan bread's very good. It is. Probably the best thing India has introduced. We have naan bread in the shape of a pita. That's one of my meals

that I get. And whenever I get it, I'm like, it's like carrots and celery and some chicken on naan bread. This is not enough. I'm going to be hungry. No. Naan bread will fill you up.

Oh yeah. It's like a really girthy tortilla. It's got some punch behind it. You might as well wrap your thing in like nine pitas. You'll have a naan bread. It's good stuff. I love Indian food. It's one of my favorite foods for sure. Naan veggie. the veggie indian food

is just different brown bushes it's all i i'm shocked that you do and i have a theory that if i brought you here to the restaurants that i don't like you wouldn't also like them fair enough that indian you're saying i just know when I... You're the worst Indian I know. You won't like it at all. This hole-in-the-wall buffet that has no meat in the whole restaurant? You won't like it. Matt Woodworth is 100% correct about the Nod Palace in North Carolina.

It is terrible. It is trash. Ask anyone. It's bad. I watched a lot of Cohen testimony. I was a little disappointed. No, I've been pretty busy last uh few days i haven't watched a ton of it no so the democrats pretty much just said hey tell me more more more about this stuff and he he wasn't involved in any russian collusion he had one little thing where he's like i saw don jr said yeah the men that's meetings all set i think they were talking about

that meeting but it's not good there's no recordings it's nothing it's it's a nothing burger didn't he commit like real deal big deal tax fraud like yeah he and trump have both committed tax fraud so so he had documents on trump's tax fraud. He brought his financial reports. And I guess one thing Trump would do is when he was trying to get a loan, his properties were worth a ton. And when he was trying to pay taxes, his properties were worthless. And he would just choose their values and go that way. So there's some fraud on one side or the other.

Of course, there's a Stormy Daniels thing. He had to cancel checks with Donald's signature. Is it canceled when you cash a check? But he had the checks with Donald's signature and stuff, copies of it, sort of proof that he paid him. They're making a big deal out of the fact that he did it while he was president. He was committing this campaign fraud even from the Oval Office. Does that make it worse? I don't know.

And by the way, something about it being about a girl somehow makes the lie more like acceptable to me i don't know if that's crazy if other people think that too but i thought that with clinton as well like yeah clinton lied under oath but he was trying to deny a blow job oh like okay you know yeah trump paid hush money to a porn star but he's trying to not let people find out that he fucks around like dude i bet he's done that like half a dozen times before that like he's a billionaire who fucked like yeah whores and supermodels he definitely paid people off if if it was a different topic then i might be more inclined to like nail him to the wall over this campaign finance fraud. If it was some sort of defense contractor fraud, where like, oh, I'm friends with Bill

who works for this company who wants to build a plane for the Navy, and so I'm going to finagle some numbers. Or in some way not operating in America's best interest. He could do that with a military contractor, and no one would say anything about it nobody comes after those military contractor guys like if so trump has been slow to enact like sanctions right and then he like lifted sanctions on russian oligarchs and the storyline

of russia i'm sorry trump being rougher on russia than any other president has fallen apart since then if we could prove that he had like he did arm the wrong motivation then uh people against them yeah that krumia maybe but if we could prove that he worked with bad intent like you know he didn't have america's best years that would be a big deal to me but all we did is prove so far that he wants to pay off stormy daniels and make sure that she keeps her mouth shut that doesn't seem like the kind of national betrayal that the other hypothetical thing would be yeah especially like why like they're talking about this day in day out yeah as this like pakistan india shit's going on and that i haven't been following it closely so i don't know all the cohen shit it's just like from the

outside looking in being very busy the last week or so just being like holy shit like if i didn't see one random thing on twitter like one random account post this like i would not know that this shit is unfolding between india and pakistan i would just know about this cohen thing and that's just insane to me third aspect of the cohen thing was a racism charge and that again like none of it felt new right so trump has been accused of laundering russian money right these russians apparently but he remains he remains almost untouchable for exactly this reason is that everything that would normally screw you if you were a president of the united states or a candidate for the president of the united states like rolls off his back it's crazy the um the one that bugs me that he does

is like you could call it witness tampering right like when he's like this guy's a rat this guy shouldn't do this you know this is you know i don't want to misquote him but like you know he he'll scare a person against tampering or he'll imply that if you were to lie like a pardon could come your way and that stuff happens so in public on twitter that it almost like gets away with it like if we saw some of that stuff happen behind the scenes, it would be big drama craziness. But because he does it in front of 40 million people, it's like, if you murder people in a crowd,

that's not a murder. Everyone saw it. Obviously you weren't hiding anything. I'm standing my ground. If he pardoned Kyle, that would be the best timeline for whatever happened he's like i've followed these videos on youtube for years channel actually i started to dislike him a little more when i learned that he's not russian

but he's still a very cool guy and mr kyle Kyle Lamar Byers, you are pardoned. And all your guns are returned. But not the bump stocks. He would be my favorite president of all time. I'd like him to. If he pardons Kyle. Hey, who doesn't like to get a little high? That would be so fucking funny. Actually, you know what?

A tag onto the end of this pardon to get all the Democrats on board. I'm actually putting through legislation to make exactly what Mr. Myers is accused of doing legal. All you have to do is deny it and get away with it. And I'm giving him a surplus tag as an apology.

From our great nation. That's my favorite timeline. Yeah, I like this. Yeah, I go along with that. Otherwise, I'm going to have to be a Bernie bro, right? Kyle is a Bernie bro now. I can't believe Bernie's running. Bernie's going to be 82 years old.

He's the most popular of the Democratic candidates. Is he? I told you he would be. I told you he would be. I haven't been watching. I'm going to see. I saw some that said that he was the most popular among potential Democratic

voters. Absolutely. Who knows how reliable that is. He's going to be your front runner. He's got better name recognition. He's got a better platform. He's going to be the guy. But the Dems don't want to run an independent. Do you think it can go back that way? do you think we can ever go back after this after trump oh yeah for sure it's you're like i think it's oh dude it's like it's an engine they're trying to put

an establishment person back in there like even most republicans don't like trump no it's not that i disagree with that that's not true But what has been pushed in terms of the envelope of politics, of what you can do, get away with, say, behave, and act like, and still be elected, has changed so much with him. Oh, that's probably right. Do you think we ever go back? I don't think it ever goes back. To clarify, Woody, I didn't mean his base of Republicans. I mean the establishment sitting people in office.

A lot of them really don't care for him. But I don't think that it's going to be i mean i think it's probably going to return to normal for the most part like as far as politics being politics and them well you can see that a lot of the candidates are trying to like do the hey i'm down to earth tooth thing because you know like uh alexandria you know ocarina of time whatever the fuck her name is like like her or not like she knows how to play the social media game she's of our generation i think she's around my age like she knows how to play that game and she does a good job endearing herself to to her constituents and then all these awkward as fuck like elizabeth warren beto they try and imitate her success on there

and it just comes off as like fellow kids you're wrong about beto though beto had a real success oh him skateboarding was so lame i didn't see that but i did these facebook live things where he did it really apparently he skated um yeah but i think beta was generally regarded as uh as like one of the maybe second best. Well, on the Democrat side. I think Trump you have to call the best. I think Biden. I think it goes Sanders-Biden.

It's social media, I'm saying. It's social media. Yeah, okay. As far as social media, you're right. I think it goes Trump, AOC, Beto as far as the ones I'm thinking about. Okay, fair enough. I haven't looked at his. Most of my opinion on that was formed by his skating tape where he skated in a way

that someone who... You used to longboard, and if you saw this guy, you'd be like... I still do sometimes. Yeah, you still do. I forgot about that. This year? Okay, you of today. You suck at that.

What are you doing? I need to see it. I think it's Bernie number one as far as just raw grassroots popularity. And then I think that the establishment Dems are really pushing Biden and Kamala Harris, especially Kamala Harris, because they think that hits the right tick boxes for demographics. Yep. But who knows? They may fall back on Biden because he has a great association with Obama which is good for

the Democratic base and I bet Obama will come out for him he hasn't so far he'd have to come out for his own VP he's waiting to see how the waters turn but there's no way he could come out and be like you know this guy who I didn't choose for Vice President

is better than my Vice President he's not going to do that we'll see This guy who I didn't choose for vice president is better than my vice president. He's not going to do that. We'll see. Or I wouldn't think so. It's funny how you take the conspiracy angle around Harris. Like the media is pushing. Well, I've heard you say, is her name Camila?

Is that her first name? Kamala Harris. They absolutely are artificially trying to boost her up. Like they're trying to make her into a phenomenon. Whereas all of the grassroots people on the Dem side really seem to be pushing for Bernie. And they'll be like, this Kamala lady, she's surging in the polls. And it's like, you guys make so many stories coming out about Kamala's popularity. Who does this stuff? You guys are pushing her.

Bernie's more popular. Right. Here's the counter argument to that. Sure. When she was real popular, Bernie wasn't's the counter argument to that. Sure. When she was real popular, Bernie wasn't running yet. She announced before Bernie did. When she announced, she picked a three-day weekend where people had off. I guess normally that's a terrible time to announce.

But she cleverly did it, and there were no other stories. So the only story for like three days straight was that Kamala Harris is running for president and she got this big boost. And to me, it's over. I'm not seeing it like I did before. And she just had like sort of the best, I don't know, what's the start to a race called?

Like the best tactic off the start maybe? Yeah, you know, she just got, if she were a swimmer, she got the best dive, you know? just got true if she were a swimmer she got the best dive you know and and now it's on to racing they did they have pumped her up a bit and they've also like i'm talking about like the media as a whole they're already coming out with shit of like bernie uh this russian tampering they're doing it to promote bernie bernie has russia on his side like yeah i saw this from i think saw this from NBC where they're like, beware the so-called Bernie bros

because it's Russia astroturfed and shit like that. And it's like, no, it's just there's a fuck ton of young people that are behind. I don't really like Bernie at all. But to deny that he has an enormous grassroots following

is just silly. It's confirmed the Russians were helping him in 2016 but a couple facebook ads is not going to sway the population and get people and get this many people on his side like but that's disingenuous to say it's a couple facebook ads right i mean they had a team of people astroturfing around the clock we saw that on reddit like the most popular social media site on the planet there were facebook ads in the case of donald trump like they literally shared their polling data so they knew who to

target like they were the russians did more than just buy a couple of facebook ads they created the astroturfing that created the rest but where was this astroturfing was it was facebook right it was facebook it was reddit it was twitter even on well i mean go on reddit and try and find pro-trump shit like it was not hard to do in 2015 2016 right oh no because it was a phenomenon all those guys were exploding with it exactly but like yeah they were but to say that reddit posts or that a facebook campaign is swaying the majority of people is silly in my opinion especially when you take into account that hillary clinton's campaign paid i mean it came out in a mueller document i believe about how much they said the russians were paying you know for these ads and it was a what the russians

paid for facebook ads is not the extent of the russian campaign don't forget the emails that were released week after week after week right via wiki leaks the podesta emails were the dominant story the russians and i'm on to trump now not bernie the russians literally like dropped new week after week, right, via WikiLeaks, the Podesta emails, were the dominant story. The Russians, and I'm on to Trump now, not Bernie, the Russians literally dropped new emails so they could change the topic after the Access Hollywood tapes. And this is one of the closest elections we've had in our lifetime, my lifetime. And 80,000 votes would have changed the whole thing. He actually lost the popular vote. This is a very, very close election.

And the weekly email drops, the Facebook ads, and then the astroturfing was a really big thing with all the bots getting the donald to dominate the social media like they did a lot more than just behind the leaks or anything they have yeah i mean you have to read the mueller indictment on it where he like goes like page by page listing the ip addresses that they came from and the people like the individuals that were involved yeah you can't change ip addresses those are set in stone he tells they didn't even hide them they came from russia so um their tactics were very effective and to dismiss it as like you know their facebook budget wasn't very large. Yeah, that wasn't their primary motive. It just seems not... Am I wrong?

Am I wrong? Or weren't they just releasing the truth about Hillary Clinton? It's not like they were making up propaganda lies. They weren't saying Hillary Clinton is a demonic alien baby salesman. They were like, here's a thing Hillary did. Here's another thing hillary did here's another thing that hillary did they were releasing her internal campaign emails that made her look bad and a lot of times they didn't did they make her look bad or was she bad a lot of times they didn't even make her look bad a lot of times it was just keeping email hey a new batch of emails came and the voters i think

were conflating the emails that she deleted and the emails that were released from Podesta because they're just emails are emails. And it was keeping that as the storyline all election. It seemed like a pretty fair playing field to me because they're releasing a tape of Trump saying, I grab him by the pussy. And then they say, and here's what Hillary did. It seemed like. I do see the balance there. Yeah, I think that i think that's fair it seemed like there was a balance like neither of these people are angels these are both scummy candidates it's a little scum that tastes best to you i agree with that that's true but the uh there was something there's a specially bad taste in a lot of people's mouth

when it's a foreign adversary like russia an enemy of america pumping up one of the candidates right like if i mean there was the steel dossier based off a foreign agent the uk agent yeah yeah that's a foreign agent yeah it's they're not paid by an enemy it was released from what mi5 or whatever like yeah so if people don't know what the steel assy was it originally started as a republican research document trying to get dirt i think it was might have been take cruises i'm not sure though but the the gop was funding this thing trying to get dirt on hillary no on trump Trump. I'm saying it wrong. And then when that candidate dropped out, it might have been Cruz,

Hillary picked up and they finished the funding on it. And that Steele dossier was never released during the election or anything like that. But it was used as a source. I want to talk about the next election. Because we've had this discussion a bunch of times. In the end, the truth is

that there are no good side there's there's no side that didn't cheat um there's no side that wasn't in one way pumped up by a foreign agency it's bullshit that's that's really mixing the details right to act like it's true having a buried steel dossier document that they didn't use during the election and weekly email drops off of hillary is like hey six one hand half dozen the other we're all guilty i'm not the same but they were all guilty you know one side was just better at it and if you want the most effective president the the trump side the side that wanted trump however you want to look at it what i'm saying is we've already like had this

discussion a bunch of times i i was more interested in talking about the next election cycle and who we think is going to be there for the Dems. And if we think that the wide field that the Dems are going to be putting forward is going to be good for them or bad for them. If Trump is bulletproof, if anything's ever going to actually happen. He's not bulletproof.

Look. So far. Show me a drop of blood and I'll start signing on to that. Dude, he's been hamstrung and and opposed by people the whole time based on things like he yep he's definitely not bulletproof hasn't heard him yet he's doing everything he wants to do um he's he's still trying to push through the the the wall he's he's declaring emergencies like like whenever he gets

he's not even trying to push through the wall. He signed that bullshit bill that's not going to do anything. And so, like, now when I see these MAGA bros who are like, trust the plan. Trust Trump's magic 4D plan. It's like, dude, no. He could have pushed this through in the first two years in office. Like, this is a farce. The Republicans never really wanted a wall and the democrats obviously don't want one like it feels like a kabuki theater of nonsense and so now when i

see people like oh defend trump he's got a plan he's got a plan it's like what what makes you think he has a plan for this so taylor just innocent question do you think trump didn't really want the wall in his first two years or do you think this possibility the first two years flew by so quickly he's like fuck i ran out of time i never got to it i think that the the people behind the scenes for trump were pressuring him into what pleases their constituents and their donors the most which would be that tax cut and so he prioritized that and then now you know they've kept him off that issue for long enough and i think at some point it was like okay trump now has plausible deniability for the wall where it's like you know i tried to get it through and it didn't work out oops sorry really it's like you waited until you

knew it was kind of an impossibility and then you proposed it and now you can go democrats democrats they're they're shutting me down on this when it's like okay if you had truly wanted that as hard as you had proposed initially you you would have done it i agree mostly but i i i do kind of think there might have been a holy smokes it's 2018 already and i didn't get it done oops maybe i i i don't give him that little credit like i i think that that his i mean obviously the people he's trying to get and influence the most are the republican donors and and people like that and those people the big republican donors they don't want a wall they want that borderline slave labor that comes in and drives down the cost of wages like that's what they want the democrats don't want it because

they get free voters and those donors get wages. Come on, Woody. How are you going to do that? Illegal aliens can't vote. Taylor agreed with you. He's like, hey, they want lower wages for their workforce. That doesn't mean I have to agree that illegal aliens vote. No, no. I'm not saying illegal aliens vote.

That's the plan, though. That's how I understood it. That's the Democratic plan is to give them amnesty and to make them citizens. Is it not? Yeah. The plan is to bring people in, give them amnesty and then allow voting. And, and,

and if you look at people from South America, they overwhelmingly vote left. And that's just a fact. And like, whether it's first generation, second generation, like it's, I'm not suggesting that the guy,

and so my whole point comes across the board today, comparing the tactics. Yeah. My whole point wasn't about comparing the tactics. It was about both sides, not wanting it for their own donors reasons. For sure. Yeah, my whole point wasn't about comparing the tactics. It was about both sides not wanting it for their own donors' reasons. For sure. Yeah, for sure.

The Democrats want a legion of free voters, and the Republicans definitely want a legion of free workers. Yeah, they want low wages. Yeah, I think that if they wanted to stop people from coming in, if they made it not economically viable to hire them,

it would solve the problem. Of course. If they just went after the employers. I'm sorry? E-verify? Right, right. Yeah, I'm totally on your team. Heavy duty fines, right?

You go to some contractor and all of a sudden it costs like $15,000 per illegal employee. They'll start looking for social security numbers before they hire them. And it's not hard to find. I could take it. If you said, hey Kyle, I'll give you

$1,000 for every illegal immigrant you find working at a plant. Oh! Let's go for a little ride to Gainesville, Georgia. We're about to become millionaires always. Many, many times over. And what's fucked up about that shit is

every time you hear about a business there's hundreds and hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of them oh there's tons of them if you ever like everyone there is like if you all the stories you hear about oh an illegal immigrant was caught working at joe's barbecue shack and was deported do you think joe's barbecue shack or alan's deli or some shit is, is employing these people? No, like,

as like, or they are employing them, but it's like one guy or something. It's never Walmart. They go after, it's never Amazon. It's never these giant corporations. It's like,

and they're the ones who are taking advantage of it the most guaranteed. Like Walmart is so ridiculous with it that they'll pay their workers so little money that then those workers go and take government benefits and so it's like oh cool walmart awesome so you sell us these cheap goods pay your work so little and then we have to almost unknowingly subsidize your behavior with our taxes so we're really not saving any money on those little costs are we i am yeah i don't know who hires the most. I haven't heard much about that. I can tell you in my visibility, it's the construction industry.

All the drywallers, all the painters and stuff. You have a hard time even finding a guy. The guy that sells it to you is American, and then the guy that does the work is not. That's hard to avoid in this area. It's like that in a lot of places. I think if you go into more farming areas, all those guys work in the fields will be illegal aliens.

The meat processing plants? Okay. It's all illegal aliens. The people who take the chicken and turn it into chicken breasts are all illegal aliens. I don't know why I thought that was a machine. It is a machine in a lot of places. There are a lot of machines involved, but there's a person i don't know why i thought that was a machine it is a machine in a lot of places

there are a lot of machines involved but there's a person manning the machine there's the chickens are going by on hooks and stuff and there's a person who's like doing a thing to them and pushing it on on down the line there's there's a lot of human interaction with those machines just like any other you know cars made by robots But there's a guy there making sure the robot doesn't become sentient and take over. That's what they do. You got to be there ready to. And we really want him as the underpaid illegal immigrant. Yeah.

Look, Javier was bred for this. Okay, this is what he does. There's an extra tendon in his ankle. That's right. Fast twitch muscle fibers. Pow! Those Guatemalans can stop rogue tendon in his ankle. That's right. Fast twitch muscle fibers. Pow! Those Guatemalans can stop rogue AI in a heartbeat. Yeah.

I've heard... We're talking about racist biology. I don't know if it's true or not. I've heard that baseball scouts have a preference. If all other things are equal and a guy is darker skinned, they say they do better in the heat that was like i mean that's probably just do right like as a white guy i'm like yeah you know heat's not my thing i kind of burn i uh yeah that's not racist at all that's like that's evolution right but it's black people can handle the sun better than white people. If they're like, you need to pick the best power lifter in the world,

where are you going to fly? I'm going to be like, Iceland and probably somewhere in Eastern Europe because those guys are ridiculous. Ridiculously, they're like, you need to find the fastest, the best endurance runner in the world. Sprinter endurance. Where are you going to go? Yeah.

Huh, endurance? Yeah, I think I'm going to go to Kenya because the best endurance runner in the world. Sprinter endurance. Where are you going to go? Yeah. Huh? Huh? Endurance? Yeah. I think I'm going to go to Kenya because they seem to beat everybody's ass handily at that shit. So, I mean,

yeah, it makes sense that like darker skin people would do better than light skin people in the sun. Yeah. Um, no, no, I had fun with the politics talk.

Yeah. But I didn't bring it up. He's going to win. Place your bets. Place your bets, motherfucker. India versus Pakistan. Is that where we're betting on? I'm going to lean on India.

Me too. I'm on Team India for this, I think. Isn't that beside we're more on? You know one thing? Yeah, it is. Here's the thing i kind of have faith in i don't think trump would go into india unless we really had to i think his instinct would be not to go to war because you can't find it on a map you're thinking

no because he wants to pull out of syria he wants to pull out of iraq i think he's not a uh not on fox news i i really hope that he pulls us out of Syria. And, dude, if he gets us involved in Venezuela, Jesus fucking Christ. That would be the dumbest, dumbest thing to do. I agree, right? And what he's done so far is a little saber rattling, right? Like, hey, we support this guy. Don't you dare.

We're going to cut off this. The whole world is watching you etc etc but i'm like ah trump negotiates like a goose you know he he rushes up to you with full of bluster and then stops you know he's not at goose they don't attack like rhinos he has a briefcase run you know so um you So, you know, we're used to, like, past U.S. presidents who are very measured in the way that they negotiate and talk. With Trump, like, you don't get too excited when he gets all verbose. It's cool.

Yeah. So we'll see what happens in 2020. I think that the Democrats are going to have a very tough time convincing somebody, or convincing their base, not to go with Bernie. in 2020. I think that the Democrats are going to have a very tough time convincing somebody, or convincing their base not to go with Bernie, as far as the young voters who are passionate about it. It's going to be Trump versus

either Bernie or Biden. The idea of any of those women actually getting nominated and putting up a fight is absurd. It won't happen. Don't believe in it. It has nothing to do with sexism. sexism no i do is it because they're women or something else uh it's part of it certainly part of it okay um and i think that the um the anger that will be felt by a certain part of the democratic party because you're going to have a white male as their uh nominee will be part of why they will lose.

Well, that's why we're putting up a Cherokee Indian woman. Yeah. A little Cherokee. I'd love that. Trump would love that if they put her up again. Please, please. I donated $1 million to her campaign. I've been going out and putting signs up myself.

Anything, anything for Pokemon. That would be hilarious if he's out there. I just hope the Democrats put anyone up there other than Warren because I am terrified of Warren. You know how much I love my hair. I would look terrible scalped. I can just see, like, get rid of the MAGA hat and have, like, faux smallpox blankets as the Republican.

You got a t-shirt cannon with smallpox blankets. That's so fucking funny. Kyle, I think you're wrong about Bernie because... Place your bets, motherfucker! Money where your mouth is! Bernie polls better with the black voting base than any other Democrat by a long shot. Okay, what's your point?

They need the black voting base to win. I said Bernie or Biden. I mean, I think that the black voting base would get behind Kamala Harris. That's pretty hot. Yella, if you ask me. Pretty what? I don't understand those words. I think that the black voting base would get behind Kamala Harris. She's pretty high yellow, if you ask me. Pretty what? I don't understand those words. High yellow?

Yeah. I don't know what that means. Bernie or Biden, that's going to be your nominee. Trump's going to be Bernie easily. Biden, it's a real coin flip. It's a real coin flip. It's a real coin flip. I'm not as sold as you are. I really think that Bernie might have a shot against him.

I have my own prejudices. He's a socialist, and I don't want an old candidate. There are Democrats who will not sign on board with a full-on Democratic socialist. Non-Democrat, just so we're all clear, independent Bernie Sanders, 82-year-old while in office, over his finger, shakily on the button. Okay, I'm just saying, Biden is their best shot, but I think there is a whole contingent of the Democratic Party who's like, no, not a white, straight male, never. Let's get, they're picking, they want their candidate to be like an Apex Legends

character, which that metaphor is lost on you guys, but... So you can breathe frost or whatever the fuck that game's about? In Apex Legends... There's gonna be a robot with a grappling hook? Yeah. Okay, I don't care what party that guy runs as, I'm voting for the robot cyborg

with the grappling hook. In Apex Legends, you have a non-binary character you have a gay uh a gay like um samoan type character who likes to ride motorcycles with his boyfriend um and you've got a few a few lesbians of mixed uh race right and then you've got one white male his name caustic he uses gas to kill the other characters that is fucking that is a good bit he's he's the most hardcore of them all like a lot of the other characters they're like come here sugar we're gonna have a good time the other characters like i've been training and preparing then you get the caustic he's, I am here to collect the souls of my enemies.

The only way to tell who's the best is bloodshed. I'm ready to enact a final solution. It's always like that. 4chan is like, hollow Caustic is my favorite character. He gasses minorities. He's the best character in Apex Legends. So yeah, I'm telling you, if they pick one of these ladies

or some non-binary character or some robot with a grappling hook, they're not going to beat straight white male Donald Trump already in office with the white house behind him with all of that funding behind him and and and with plan he's like hey i've done this this is what's next he's proven to some extent that he won't blow up the world so that that whole narrative is over you know who the best of the democratic candidates is in my opinion who's not getting nearly enough time is tulsi gabard

yeah i love her she's she's anti-war she's like get us the fuck out of all these overseas conflicts and i'm like okay i'm totally on board with that i may not know all your positions or agree with a lot of the rest of them but at least you're whole hog get us the fuck out no we're not intervening in venezuela like that kind of shit so i like that about her i don't i am the you know my i i view the universe through my own paper towel roll i keep seeing yang do you see him a lot the i don't know who yang is i haven't seen yang he's a democrat he's for universal basic income he's a very successful ceo like technology future dude i do actually know who this is yeah he's a very good speaker say that again i think it's the future but not the present

i think it's the distant future let me lay this out it'll just take one minute yeah go for it um we've got we've got plenty so way back in the day i've talked about this before you had people they were fishing with spears there's 12 guys fishing with spears supplying the tribe with the fish that's what they did that someday someone comes along they invent the net this is the north carolina legislature yes so someday someone comes along and they invent the net and they put 11 spear fishermen out of work right but they don't go out of work they go back and they build huts and they do things and then all of a sudden our standard of living is increased and our needs are

insatiable unsatisfiable so um people always find some new job because people always want more stuff and you get productive and you do things and etc the theory is that these robots are going to robots are going to come along. And I'm terrible. You bastard. It's not about you. This is me for 45 years now. I'm trying to change.

You already said nuclear five times. Don't even worry about it. So they're saying the robots are going to put everyone out of work and that we're going to be in a land of abundance, right? Because our trucks are going to drive themselves and our goods are going to manufacture themselves and that we're going to, these things are going to be abundant. We're not going to have a problem

and we'll be able to supply universal basic income to these people. And they'll be able to use that to, you know, sort of meet their basic needs and then find their best place in life. Maybe that's a creative pursuit. It'll supply a safety net of basic income. $1,000 a month. Can't live on that, but it helps. And I can see that future, but man, I think it's far

away. Does everybody get that? I don't expect you to know everything about it, but people, so net payers into the system, like all of us i assume like yes everybody um the only people who sort of don't get it are the people already getting it right so they're like man that's 12 000 a year across 330 million people and they're like well first of all a lot of those are kids so they don't get it second of all a lot of those guys are on disability so fuck then they already get their thousand dollars a month a lot of them are on welfare, food stamps. We're taking it out of that. So yeah, this is basically people who aren't already living off the government get this universal basic income.

Maybe not the rich though, right? No, literally Trump, Bezos, everyone. That's the plan. What's the first part of that one? The first part of this thing we're talking about? Universal basic income? Yeah. Is that what you needed to hear? Yeah.

No, I know. My point being that that's the point of it. Oh, universal. That's the first part, universal. Yeah, yeah. We're on the same page now. No one with any common sense would do that. Why?

To save money. There's no reason that the people over... The people making over a quarter million dollars a year, let's say, don't need... I think I've actually heard Yang. Did Yang... Was he... Shit. Was he on Sam Harris at some point?

Had a talk about... Could have been. He seems to be hitting all the smaller places. I bet we could get him on this show. I saw him on... Oh, we could not get him on the show. It would tank. tank his ability to get on yeah yeah but i i've seen yang on the show and my roots are gonna start shining i'm gonna make it look bad i don't know he's a very good speaker the jews so before we started recording you said you hated here let's go here

i've seen him on smaller shows than this one maybe not shows that have covered uh goat fucking as much as this one but smaller yeah we'll open with the mermaid question how are you but um i actually did i heard him talk on sam harris started talking about um about universal uh. I heard him talking about universal income and then also talking about the kind of unexpected impact that self-driving trucks are going to have on the kind of blue-collar workforce. Is that being one of the remaining blue-collar jobs

that made people a good livable wage was truck driving and that that is going to be disappearing in the next 10, 15 years tops before that gets taken out like that and i hadn't even considered the impact of self-driving cars on the workforce but there's more so truck driving is huge but forklifts in factories are also huge uh ubers are also huge taxis are. Like there's a lot of driving. It would put tens of millions of, you know, not college educated men out of work. And that's not distant future. That's near future. Well, that's...

We're close on the fucking technology for that now. Here's why I disagree. I think that even when this truck gets to be self-driving, for a long time, there'll be an operator in the truck. And then as these guys age out, it'll start to be like one guy man's five trucks, you know, and he's responsible for his zone. And people are able to sort of like retire out of these jobs.

And we don't get the wave of like everyone unemployed today. This was in a podcast that I heard though, because they were talking about that probably as it starts, that the long distance stuff goes first. So they probably have drivers when they're actually in the city

or around like kind of the infrastructure that's more difficult to traverse than just like highway stuff. And that you're right, that one of the other ones they suggested was that it's very likely that it happens to be like one guy manages a couple

as opposed to one for one for begin with but all of these would lead to eventually reductions and then the loss of this is a job yes now the the question is whether this time is different because the loss of this as a job has been happening since we invented fishing nets you know to go back to my earlier metaphor. Computers put tons of people out of work, but here we are with a really low unemployment rate. This is just the next computers. No more, no more carriage drivers, no more horse and buggy operators. Okay. They find something else to do most of the time. Let me tell everyone about Turo very quickly though. Turo is a peer-to-peer cararing marketplace where you can book any car you want, wherever you want, from a community of local hosts. Turo is available in over 5,500 cities across the United States, Canada, the UK, and Germany, with over 9 million users worldwide.

You can choose the best car for you, opt in to lower cost than traditional car rental agencies, and you can customize your experience for whatever your adventure demands. agencies and you can customize your experience for whatever your adventure demands. Toro has over 850 plus unique makes and models available, including Tesla, Porsche, Mercedes, BMW, Ferrari, Subaru, Toyota, and more. Check them out. Yeah, Toro, like Airbnb for cars, a better way to rent. Man, that Greek food was so good. I hadn't eaten today.

I have a video I think is worth watching. Imarked it i guess three weeks ago taylor has stepped away but um i'm interested the student tries to get his friends to jump another kid no one helps him while he's used as a punching bag okay that sounds fun yeah yeah i'm in i in. People think I just bring politics. I also bring child beating. Yes! Perfect. I'm ready when you're ready. You want to wait on Taylor?

You're just going to freeze Taylor out like that? I guess I didn't know how long he'd be. Can you help me bridge the gap while he's gone? I mean, I guess I could try. I mean, let's watch. Oh, see filthy wants to freeze him out.

Well, filthy wants to freeze him out. Oh, I see that you get bridge. The gap is in wait for him to get back. You wanted to fill the air. Yeah. We'll talk about it.

Oh, I see. Oh, I see. No, impossible. Only wings could do that. And he's not here. Fuck your school zone. Bullshit. I still like that one. Impossible. Only Wings could do that. And he's not here.

Fuck your school zone bullshit. I still like that one. Yeah. Yeah. I watch a lot of Wings content, man. It's good shit. He's sitting there with his dog in his lap, and the dog is clearly afraid of him.

Really? I don't know what happened to that poor... He had this poor fucking Labrador that he kept chained up in the backyard and every time I went there it was like oh you want to play with me hey you want to play and I was like I really don't have time to play little fella doesn't anyone else play with you he's like no never never and I was like I'll play with you a little but I got I got to go I got to hit the road or or gangster will get here and she'll start trying to sling Some shit my way I gotta ride

Oh play with me a little I don't know what happened to that dog He probably died Some terrible death and he doesn't want to talk about it But he had some tiny dog in his lap And the dog was like let me go Let me go don't Don't crush me

Don't pretend I'm a lap dog. I'm not on your lap all the time. You're faking. You could tell that Wings has probably stepped on that dog at least once before. Who hasn't stepped on their dog? You do, right? Get their feet sometimes to yelp. That's a fair point.

You every once in a while accidentally step on their paw and you feel really bad. My dog, Harley, she's older now. She's, I think, maybe six, but that's pretty old for a great day and uh every once in a while i'll just want to like move her like shuffle her by her rear and she yelps like i just beat her badly and it's like oh my are you in pain arthritis i dated a girl who almost dumped me over that like she like she was holding her dog and was like pushing it towards me. And I like literally touched its nose. Touched its nose.

And like yelped. And she's like, what did you do? I can't be with someone. I'm like, it's a fucking dog. I have no idea what it just yelped for. It's a fucking dog. There's no way it remembered when I smacked it the other week. It's a dog.

I touched it on the nose. It's not like last time where I clocked it in the head. The dog turned at me and was like, and my wife is looking at me, and I was like, that shouldn't have hurt. That was gentle scooching. So Taylor, there's a link I just put in? Public freak out.

Yep, I'm on it. Okay. I'm queued up. How have I never browsed this subreddit? This seems really funny. Okay. Are you guys ready? Yeah set sorry one second So loading. Okay. Yeah, I'm good ready set play Do something he's tough he's with his friends cool hairstyle Do something he's tough he's with his friends cool hairstyle Jump in jump in.

They're like nah. They said straight one on one. Yo bro come on! What you gonna do? Come on bro! Punch him nigga! That's how you fight! That's how you fight!

I've tracked you three times. What you gonna do in front of your niggas? Nigga, rock the nigga. Oh, no. He's looking to his friends for backup. Still. A lot of N-word use for some people who aren't quite brown enough. I'm offended Yeah, I don't see any black people here. No one okayed this

Maybe they have hood passes. You just don't know it could be in the wallet What are you What you gonna do? What did he say? You gonna off? Nigga, punch him. Punch him. Stop killing him. Punch him in the face. Oh! This big boy's quick enough. He's quick, right? His defense is good, too.

He has a feeling for range. Yeah, look at this. He's not bad. He's dodged six punches at this point. You see? He knows exactly the guy's range. Yeah. Yeah.

He dodged six punches at this point. You see, he knows exactly the guy's range. Yeah. I don't know why this guy thought he should pick on this heavy set fella. He thought he had four friends. Dude, I felt so bad. So I didn't see what led into this, right? For all I know,

the little guy was being picked on and he stood up for himself and then just found himself in a bind, right? Or the little guy could have been a captain badass. Cause he thought he had his friends with him and realized he didn't. I don't know. Yeah. Like he went into it, like jump in.

Yeah. Jump in. Yeah. I'm going to straight one on one. You guys jump in because I'm, I'm not confident about this engagement. Yeah, yeah. He got hit twice. Okay, guys.

Now jump in. That husky kid had some quick hands. He had quick hands and a feeling for range, right? Like he was dodging just by going straight back. Out of curiosity, is this like the intro on how to get into UFC? Like you start here? This is exactly what you do yes okay you go up to a group of because i thought i thought the heavier guy had a lot more and you challenge them you can see him you can really see him getting into the swing of it like he was gaining confidence across that he like hits it

once and the other guy's just like i can't do anything about this and like you can see him get more and more confident and more and more like and at one point like these it's like the littler guys like hitting him and he doesn't know what to do like he like shoves him and hits him and it doesn't move like when he's shoved up against the other group and you can just see him go like oh size is a big impact to you little guy didn't want to engage to like i think he was hoping to get out or get help throughout almost all of it and at one point little guy had an opportunity for offense and he chose the double hand on chest push i'm like i think he did that because he didn't want what would come with a better attack yeah he didn't want to be probably he saw the writing on the wall he knew if he goes balls to the wall he's going to

get knocked the fuck out yeah yeah like it was just if he if he did better in that fight it would have just gone worse for him yeah but i like what phil he was saying where it's like you notice throughout the time where the fat guy starts off like you you coming at me homes you you stepping up to me yeah ask your friends like doing all that and then like he gets hit like a couple times by the little guy and you see him become like, Oh yeah, well come at me. You know, he's like, starts to be more like a little more bravado,

a little more. You got hit by the little guy. I think it makes sense. The little guy punched him in the stomach at one point and the guy didn't even react. And I think that to him, like was the point where he's like, Oh shit. Oh,

awesome. Like at one point he's like, oh shit. Oh, awesome. At one point he's like, that's how you fight, bro? He had his hands behind his back like he was going to, I don't know, Roy Jones Jr. him or something. He was not going to Roy Jones Jr. him. Man, I'm going to spend a lot of time on public freak out. I bet there's a ton of good shit here. Yeah, you like children fighting

in like a ring well who doesn't yeah i mean a buddy of mine went to uh to thailand for an mma thing like he went there to box and do kickboxing and it was a legit person who went to train yes he's he's like a former marine he he competes amateur and ufc stuff or mma stuff i guess you'd call it and he was super psyched a couple years ago he's like dude i'm going to thailand you should come sometime and i was like oh no and uh and he was like i'm gonna go there i'm gonna fight and so he went there and for a month went to this like fight school and he would talk about how after they would finish up at like the fight school whatever it was they would go to a bar. But in these bars, they have like the boxing ring looking contraption in the middle of the bar.

And he said he would watch as all of these old Taiwanese guys would be throwing down money and screaming, betting on like 11 year olds boxing each other hard. He was like, I was blown away. I like 11, like kids were like bleeding all over the ring and there were people like standing around like whatever fucking taiwanese shit and he's like this is a real deal fight culture like they're into this shit you know if you're 11 getting what's that did you i'm sorry did you write to a cyclist steroids while he was there you know no would you know there? No. He didn't do any steroids or anything. He's a really strong

athletic guy. He held his own while he was there. People who are tested? If you told me that, I don't know, Ben Askren, any UFC fighter, was going to Thailand to sharpen up his skills, I'm like, ah, the land where you saw that isn't.

Oh, is that a thing in Thailand? Like it's understood it's steroids? Travel in general. Your odds of getting tested are very low if you're like, you know what? Because you have to give your whereabouts to the testing agency. I'm going to be in Iceland, Scotland, Helsinki, and Thailand over the next three weeks. You should know. Yeah, you helsinki and thailand over the next three weeks you should know yeah you're gonna be doing steroids over the next three weeks and you're just very hard to sort of catch okay well i don't think he did steroids because he didn't come back more jacked than

before okay but uh yeah he was talking about how that culture there of fighting is it's not like what we have here like if you went went into an MMA gym, Woody, and you saw two 11-year-olds bare-knuckle boxing each other to the point that blood was on the ground, you'd be like, someone's got to call someone about this. Like this isn't training. That guy's placing bets.

You should be in like wrestling. That's where 11-year-olds go. Fourth grade. Little Taylor should be clubbing you with the forearm. Yes. And that's what 11 year olds go fourth grade little taylor should be clubbing you with the forearm yes yes and that's a that's still a little callback if john jones wants to take me the only stipulation is he has to limit himself to strikes to the the thick part of my skull you really want that brain I'll take you down. That brain is rattle-proof. That's where he's headed.

I'm looking forward to that. Your hand is not break-proof. I'm going to buy that pay-per-view. I'm going to throw that on the big screen. I'm going to get my dad over here and cook some fancy foods. It kind of feels like the short-term view, Taylor. No. He breaks his hand. You're like, yeah, it's a win.

Taylor is related to... Six months later, I retarded yeah taylor's related to homer simpson he's he's fine he's got that skull it's fine i i have an extra layer in my brain nice yeah i uh i tweeted out to me did we discuss this the other the other week i was tweeting out being like should i do boxing or should i do mma i don't because i want to find okay we didn't discuss it i wanted to find something not running not ellipticaling none of that where i can get good cardio and of course, MMA and boxing seem like the top two choices. The voting in the poll went a little bit skewed to,

to MMA, but the only rationale against boxing was like, you're going to get hit in the head. And it's like, no, I'm not like, I'm not going to go to a like full contact head punching place. I'm not retarded. I'm not going to do that.

Oh no. No, I wouldn't like risk my brain in my future life on getting punched a bunch of times. That's what I would do. Yeah. I just feel old. I, I wouldn't risk my brain in my future life on getting punched a bunch of times. That's what I would do. Yeah. I just feel old. I'm 46 now, and it's just like, 50-year-olds shouldn't fight. This is stupid.

You're done. Retire, asshole. Go fly your paramotor. Well, here's a feather to put in your cap. You're a year older than Alex Jones, and you look like you could be his son. No, I think the beard ages me. That's my own opinion. No, it's a great look.

Wait, Filthy, you weigh in on this. Woody's got a great looking beard. He's got that white down there, that distinguished aging white. I did notice the white beard. That's good. Yep. You like it, Filthy? You're not just saying that?

Do I like it? you're not just saying that do i like it i had really given it myself i didn't notice it it was one of the things like when you guys were big into like the fitness challenge like i was like oh like i was talking to woody when i came on like a couple times ago i was like oh you really look like you're really in the fitness thing right now i did notice the beard so it's noticeable the white in the beard yeah whether that's what you want or not that's on you man that wouldn't be my choice. I don't do any hair dyeing stuff. Sure. I got kind of lucky on top.

There's a few. This is weird. I think it makes him... Colin will be like, oh, there's a silver one. Can I pull it? No. No, you can't pull it. Like, no.

We're not going to start plucking hairs out of my head. He thinks they don't belong. But on the beard, I didn't get lucky at all it's gray as heck no that is lucky in its own way like if we if we're still doing this show you know six seven years from now i will have whiter hair than woody like i am going gray faster than i would have liked like this you can't see on my shit camera but like the sides of my hair, I'm getting quite a few silver and gray speckles. But I would argue that's good professionally.

Yeah, it does make me look older. So that's pretty neat. Hey, we're almost out of time. And I don't know if you want to talk about it. You did a work trip. I find that really fascinating. Like you go and present to customers is that what you did or was it like a conference or maybe you don't want to say oh no it's not that like interesting

like i'll basically go on behalf of a company and then present uh goods to a retail chain and explain using metrics or whatever the hell why they should include more of that product or less of something else something like that and so uh yeah that's about as interesting as it gets the most interesting part of that trip is that a woman named portia at the dallas airport served me uh first of all she took 20 minutes to bring me my beer and they're not brewing that fresh and so i didn't want to be discriminatory against porsche but but it was hard not to be you know because that's bad service but yeah it's really not that fascinating do you i am totally fascinated i might be i might be one percent of our audience i'm steering us in the wrong way kyle's vibing that i am do you specialize in like a kind of product

anything from beef jerky to health care to something not necessarily so like really the same kind of data is used across the board for the most part so like most people use iri or nielsen data in order to establish whether or not a product in retail stores is doing well or not that's changing drastically because right now we're still in the age of retail where let's say kyle is selling shirts and he has distribution at walmart and he also is distributing on amazon he can't use his amazon sales in iri or nielsen data because it's not yet tracked because it's e-commerce and so he can't use that as a point of contention for getting it into another distributor. And so it's at a weird nexus right now

in the consumer products industry where everybody has to be on e-commerce, but the metrics by which you use to show how successful your product is, if you're an e-commerce product, isn't available. And so they only want to go by IRI Nielsen data, which is established from a lot of the big retailers where you got Walmart, Target, CVS, Walgreens, Target, Kroger, Albertsons,

all that kind of shit. And so it's really, yeah, it doesn't really matter what kind of product you use the same metrics. And it really comes down to whether or not your numbers are good. So if you're over your pieces per store per week or whatever metric they're trying to set to get you to sell a certain point is good. Very easy, very easy kind of meeting to have. Cause you just basically go in and present, Hey,

you're losing out on money because bunch list of things. If you have to represent a product that's not doing so well, it is not hard. Or it is very hard to explain to them why these numbers don't represent reality. Yeah, exactly. So basically you have to go in there and the exact same numbers you used for a previous product, you have to go in and be like, this is all

bunk! This is, no, don't pay no heed to this. We're on the upturn because of XYZ. Does your girlfriend have any issue with you going on these business journeys? Does she get a little jelly, a little worried about you out in the wild? No.

Or if she does, she hasn't expressed it to me. I wouldn't think so. Are you worried about leaving her on these business trips when she's out in the wild and you're gone? Not even a little. You're pining for man's comfort. She's just out there wanting my warm body next to her and i'm trying to sell jack links to target or whatever whatever the all the things you work with i don't want to say

cheap but like to me expensive it's like gamut like all the way to like skid steer and tractor or things that go on a shelf no it, it's more going on the shelf, like retail kind of stuff. I've never done anything. Machinery. Anything machinery, no. That's almost like a separate thing because you're not looking,

if you're selling a machine to someone, like a high quality manufacturing machine, which is what I thought you were kind of talking about, you wouldn't talk about rollover or product acceleration on shelves. You't talk about rollover or product acceleration on shelves like you would talk about a different thing i don't even know what you would talk about because i don't work in that industry um but yeah most of the stuff like maintenance cost like people like one of the big metrics people don't you know if you don't

work in the industry you don't know about is like pieces per store per week like how much is this selling in a store per store per week like that's kind of a good metric they use so let's say for harley for example uh he's selling his jerky if they're like all right harley we need you for your pepperoni skew uh to sell three pieces per store per week and for your supreme skew we a skew just means stock keeping unit that's uh what what is in stores like when you see something on a shelf that's askew and so be like oh okay you need to sell three pieces per store per week of pepperoni but only 2.25 pieces per store per week of supreme but you're at 1.75 for both so what are we going

to do to remedy that do we need to pull your supreme to push more sales to pepperoni a shelf talker yeah yeah you need a shelf flag or a shelf talker or something like that to get it rolling. So yeah, to me, it's a really interesting business because until I got into it, I didn't realize all of the metrics, all of the analysis that goes into getting products on the shelves. But when you think about it the way Walmart or Target or any of these retailers does, every inch of shelf space needs to be making them a certain amount of money and so they need to pick the most efficient thing and so it's so multifaceted and so many things go into it it's hard to even explain but i really

enjoy it it's interesting to me to watch you i want to say grow up but it almost sounds condescending it's not how I mean it, but right? Five years ago, you're a stripper. Now you've become a really skilled professional at something. They're sending you, I think, single-handedly down there to represent the company and do your thing.

Yeah, usually by myself. I would guess you're ahead of the age curve for that kind of representation. Definitely. I'm very fortunate. I I would guess you're ahead of the age curve for that kind of like representation, you know, like, um, definitely. Yeah. I'm very fortunate.

Like I, I just love it. Like I love going into meetings like that, being the center of attention, like, like having answers for hard questions, like knowing the way to say the right thing and the right way to really. Uh huh.

Yeah. I bet you'd be good at it. Yeah. Yeah. It's, it's, it's largely built on like, largely built on just speaking ability. And that's always been something I'm good at.

Public speaking has never been a fear for me. Everybody's always like, oh, public speaking is scary. It's like, no, I love it. I love being the center of attention. I love having eyes focused on me as I'm doing whatever I'm doing. So it's fun. Yeah, I like that.

Did you ever do anything sales or sorry go ahead oh no no you can go i was gonna remind kyle about the outro but if you wanted to say something then did i ever go and sell stuff yeah i was wondering like in your job did they ever like conscript you for like a well we got to go and sell this fucking modem or something somewhere so when i was a i was a junior accountant and i would meet with clients but i was not the lead like you were you know like my father or the partner or the one of the other accountants was the lead and i was kind of learning it for the future so that there was a different role at cisco all my stuff was internal and yeah i would absolutely go around

and sometimes i'd teach classes which is kind of a similar kind of all eyes on you kind of thing other times I would just like pitch what we're doing trying to get buy-in from other groups I was an architect so a lot like it's like this is my idea on how we should all be doing things and this is how it would help you if you did it my way so there was you know it compares but it's also internal so okay it's not quite the same kyle do you feel a similar way because i know you were in sales like yeah like you like eyes on you being the center of attention yeah absolutely i was the one that's a salesperson thing they like yeah i was the one who would teach walk arounds to like the the like not just we got a group of customers maybe an entire family there you're you're sort of the center of attention for them but i would also do the like walk around training for all the sales people so they'd be like my peers like like

grown men double my age or more and i would teach them how to present a car you know how to how to walk around it's called a walk around you know walking literally 360 degrees all the way around the car presenting um all the features of the car you know, there's two facets of that. There's one where you need product knowledge. We're like, oh, this is a Ford Mustang. That's 300 base horsepower. And it's this kind of engine. It's this kind of fuel injection.

These are the kind of tires. But then there's like knowledge that spans the gap for every car, but people just aren't aware of it. Like, oh, yeah, every car has fucking Lexan headlights. But nobody knows that word. Nobody knows what it means so so it doesn't matter if i'm showing you a used lexus or a brand new ford focus it's lexan fucking headlights and i'm still gonna slap them hard as fuck i'm like that's a lexan headlight oh is that what that mean like it's durable it's yeah it's the material

material like kind of plastic these are kevlar reinforced serpentine belts. Absolutely. I'd say that every single time. They're all Kevlar reinforced. They're all Kevlar. Especially on this car, though. See, I would fall for that. I have no idea. These fan belts are made out of Kevlar.

Same stuff we have with the Bulletproof Vest setup. These motor mounts, let me tell you what these motor mounts do on this car. Every car. In the event of a frontal collision, that motor's not coming through the firewall and crushing you and your family it's dropping down and sliding at a 45 degree angle below you below the cabin out of the way every car does that you know like and i had one i had one of those for every quadrant of the car you the hood you ever notice that like fuzzy blanket type thing that's on the back of your hood yeah sound deadening right no no it puts out fires if the

engine catches fire those plastic plugs that hold it in place they melt and that's a fire blanket that drops down and extinguishes the thing really yeah every car has it i had especially this one yeah 35 miles per hour 35 mile per hour side impact door beams that work as a roll cage for you and your family every car has them but this one in particular has them and that's all that matters it would be it would be kind of awkward if like i show them one used car and they're like nah and now we're on the other one i'm like let's make up some new shit did i say the the Lexan headlight thing already? I was, but I don't know what the product is being sold to me,

but I can tell someone is selling. What I usually do is I try and create, you know, negative space in the conversation because if they're eager to fill that negative space, I know they're really actively trying to sell me hard on things that probably don't matter. Whereas if maybe even, you know, they, they allow really actively trying to sell me hard on things that probably don't matter. Whereas if maybe even they allow that

negative space to stand, I feel a little more confident in what they're actually saying. If that makes sense. For sure, trying to be honest and not act like the car is a perfect work of art. Yeah, it's not as fast as the Corvette, but it's much more affordable. If you look at this, this, this, this, and that, the fuel economy alone, the maintenance, the fuel cost, this will run on 87 octane rather than blah, blah, blah. And a good salesman won't just be rattling off things the whole time. They'll get you talking.

For sure. They'll get you asking questions, like try and trigger a little interest in things. I'm sure like you would, if they asked, oh, how is this roll cage different than other ones? You would have a locked and loaded kind of well? The real difference is that given this Ford focuses frame and then you'd kind of yeah for black to something else Ford has their own like safety system that

When you're sitting in this passenger seat, sir, it's weighing it knows how much you weigh It knows how tall you are that airbags not just gonna come out But just just it's not it's not a balloon that just inflates on impact That airbag's not just going to come out. It's not a balloon that just inflates on impact. That airbag knows you. It knows who's sitting in that seat. It knows if a book bag is sitting there and it doesn't need to deploy it out at all, which saves you on insurance costs. It knows if your small child is there and it shouldn't deploy at all.

It knows if a small adult is there and it should deploy low and slow. It knows if a large man is there it's going to deploy the perfect airbag for the individual sitting in this seat this isn't a one-size-fits-all this is a ford safety system and i'm so it's not just one airbag and you start talking about all the other airbags please just stop talking take my money all right let's end this episode i need to go out and buy a Ford. GT, Mustang. Not any Ford. The one he's selling.

Yeah. Yeah, right. You want the one with the Kevlar belts that Kyle has. Yeah, absolutely. Kyle, I think there's an outro. There certainly is. Let me tell everybody about a Turo. Whether it is a...

Let me make sure I read the right part. Turo is a peer-to-peer car-sharing marketplace where you can book any car you want, whether you want it from a community, wherever you want it, from a community of local hosts. From exotic sports cars to practical daily drivers, you can choose the car that's best for you,

whatever your budget. Download the Turo app, that's T-U-R-O, on the App Store or Google Play, or just visit Turo.com, and you can get $25 off your first trip when you sign up for Turo and use promo code PAINKILLER at checkout. Terms apply. Check them out.

Might be able to find yourself a lovely Ford with bulletproof fan belts and underhood fire safety blankets and engine mounts that break the engine away and slide it safely under the firewall. Like every other car made since like 1978.

And before we go, Filthy, where can everybody find you and your magic exploits? Ah, Twitch is my best spot or YouTube. You can find me Filthy Robot on Twitch and Filthy Robot on YouTube. One word, no underscore.

How's it go? That's right. One word, no underscore. It's the way to right one word no underscore it's the way to find me and uh first google result will be me so and before you come back next time i want you to join a men's hockey league and see if that gets you going with your exercise you'll have a lot of fun you're an athletic guy you're gonna be do you know how to skate good for that not a big skater all right you're not gonna have fun off the start start the way i do a lot of good slap with sticks

i imagine that's one of my favorite stories with the me and the 10 year olds and my wife being like the big one is mine yeah i took like a learn to skate the hockey class with children it's like a hundred on the ice and i'm the only one six foot skate the hockey class with children. It's like a hundred on the ice and I'm the only one six foot. The only one that can drive home. No one like that even close. They're all like 11 and under

but own kind of great bravery. All right. Painkiller already 428. Just guys. Thanks for having me on.