Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #431

Episode Date: March 29, 2019

On this week's PKA, our good friend Dick Masterson has returned to the show! And the guys talk about the recent hookers being sent to Wing's house and how he should handle it, then move onto the recent FBI raid that went down on the always in trouble, Ice Poseidon, and of course we gotta talk about some accidents going down with police and defective body cams, it is PKA after all.

Thank you already. Episode 431. Our guest, Dick Kyle. Few sponsors tonight. Captera, Goat, Lending Club, and Chegg. We'll talk about them later on the show, but yeah, it's been an interesting week. Dick dropped in at the last minute, just like everybody likes him to. What's up, boys? I always like

a little unexpected Dick. Oh, yeah. Surprise Dick. Surprise Dick is my favorite. From below, from behind, you never know when I'm coming. I'm built for Surprise Dick. That's just how I am. As soon as the schedule was called into question, I immediately went and printed up Chiz's email so I could slam,

so I could throw it up on the camera. Look, look, look. You see what you did? Right here. It's not me. Happy to be here, oh yeah she said dates were mixed up give me a sec yeah yeah dates were made you know no one in particular made any mistakes uh it happened i mean they mixed themselves up all the time i learned that uh the japanese they when they say that something

is broken or something is messed up like the way the language works it is the thing broke itself it's not like it's harder to say you broke the thing or somebody broke the thing so it's it's has an effect on the culture of having like a blameless i mean you don't want to dishonor somebody over there. Everybody's going to be disemboweling themselves in the accounting department next time. What happened to my car? It's just a break. I drive around into it

and it's a break. That seems interesting because Japanese people are like the smartest people in the world I would think. I don't fucking know. I was going to go Chinese. Whoever's on top at the moment. You'd think they would have a smart enough language to not get mixed up with something that retarded, you know?

It's got to be the Germans. That's the master race right there. I mean, they're the self-proclaimed master race. I mean, every time some shit pops off and all of a sudden there's a whole group of human beings with some advanced technology running everybody else over, it's the Germans. Yeah, but they're

self-bragging about it. The Japanese aren't out there bragging about it, and so that gives them more points. The 1800s are the century of England. The 1900s are the century of America. And this century will be the Chinese. Yeah. You think? You're always hearing, like, only two more years

until India is a superpower and they're not just shitting in the street maybe i could re-say it as like the east in general that whole china india zone out there trading with themselves are our wonderful oceans which kept us so safe and secure where we got to play sim city instead of building up armies which we didn't maybe that'll become our disadvantage as trade becomes a bigger deal. Dude, India litters on a scale like they're mad at the ocean. Oh, yeah.

It's honestly fucking insane. I saw somebody do some random tweet, and it was the top 10 lists of the worst rivers pouring shit into the ocean, and I always thought it was probably a split between China and Bangladesh and India, and I looked up a secondary source because out of the top 10 like eight of them were

india well do they have straws there maybe that's the issue i don't think they have a word for trash i think it's it's just like they don't have a concept of trash in india so it just goes straight on the ground they put it there if somebody might be able to use it later, they know where to find it. That's dirty people. They're 100% recycling. That takes me to a story from 20 minutes ago. So I'm at a red light, and not the car in front of me, but the car in front of him opens his door and drops something. I can't tell what it is. And I'm benefiting of the doubting, making that a verb, because I do that.

And I think maybe it's an apple core, right? Because it... Banana peel. On the Woody code, if you drop an apple core, or throw it in the grass... Yeah. That's fine. You follow the same code. Yeah, all right. Or a baby. Or a baby. Yeah, of course.

Biodegradable. So, then he opens the door and drops some more stuff out, and by now i can tell it is like several napkins and what i'm gonna guess is a 19 foot long receipt from a drug store prick yes right definitely trash refuse type of stuff not related to eating i think he was just cleaning out his passenger seat or something. And dumping it next to his car. So instantly what I want to do, what

I don't know if I'd be better or worse for doing this, is I want to get out of the car, go two cars ahead, and take the trash and put it back into his car. We've all seen that done on the internet, right? In Russia, yeah. And then he gets his bat, and you get your pipe, and you duke it done on the internet right in russia yeah so this is when he gets his bat

and you get your pipe and you take it out on the interstate and i like there's a couple reasons not to do this one well wouldn't you regret it if it did escalate into some sort of fight two if he shoots you in the liver right yeah yeah and but in this intersection isn't like one that's also good for foot traffic it's like it's route one but where it is it must be nine lanes wide something outrageous like that the turning lane i'm in is two lanes wide onto interstate 540 if this paints a picture for you at all it's not the place where you get out and start walking around you know like it's it's not for that and it's certainly not the place to try your Brazilian jiu-jitsu skills. I just imagine you're stepping out, and in the back of your head, you just hear the theme,

Captain Planet, he's our hero. Hello there, polluter. So I don't do that. But I do find the opportunity to sort of like catch up to him without crazy driving on the interstate. So you have him in your unlock, in your sights and you're in pursuit. By the way, this is standard police

recommended pursuit. It doesn't take a lot to catch him. I go like 72 in a 70 and I catch up to him and I can't see him. I don't know if he's looking at me because his windows are so tinted, by which I assume he's black. He's gone invisible.

Because his windows are so tinted. I think even his front windshield had tint on it. And you're like, my people don't wear camo. They just tint everything. everything dude who tints their car so dark that you can't see the human through the side view this side window the passenger window you know the guy who i got this car from that now broke down is so tinted everywhere the guy i bought it from did it it would have cost hundreds to untint it but like for the last nine years backing out at night has been a guessing game like i don't know where the back of my car so i i'm i'm on the

interstate i'm next to him i summon up my courage and i give him the thumbs down and i don't know oh what that's what i did no bird no nothing just and and then i drive on fucking better than the bird because if somebody flips me the bird it's like no you're an asshole too i may be an asshole but fuck you that's rude if they give me a thumbs down i'll feel like my dad's upset with me that's what i have so So that's what I do and I literally don't know if he was even looking over. I couldn't see through the super tinted window.

I wish he'd rolled down the passenger window and like threw a strawberry milkshake right inside of your window. It was raining, no big deal. And as you're looking at him with fury,

he just goes, eh. That's not what happened. What happened is I just gave an inanimate object a thumbs down. I couldn't see the man or woman possibly. Did you get in front of him real quick and then like? No. No, nothing like that.

That's what happened 20 minutes ago. How did we get on this topic? Littering? What a hero. Oh, India. Yeah, such a hero. Right. When I see those kids.

So you give India a thumbs down then? India gets two thumbs down. And nobody else will give them a thumbs down because racism. I see all those kids protesting right now around the world, really, but a lot in the U.S. Everybody gives India shit for littering. No, they don't. These kids are walking out of school and they're protesting America's pollution and America's policies that are a little bit dirty. You're like, policies that that are they're a little bit dirty and like oh our cars are making a little bit too much carbon guys meanwhile they're driving around

diesel everything and throwing dead bodies in rivers that stuffed with garbage like pinatas america does make the most pollution is that true uh in terms of carbon i'm positive it's true in terms of like trash into the ocean probably not i i don't even know'm positive it's true. In terms of trash into the ocean, probably not. I don't even know. But yeah, it's because our economy is so good. You have to remember that it's a pretty environment, like a low-carbon footprint to live in a shack full of discarded... What is that, aluminum?

They heat their homes with wooden fires, though. Are you saying per capita? Is it because they burn trash to heat their homes and it counters out i might be thinking yeah per capita america makes an ungodly amount of pollution five times as many of them oh shit yeah okay so you're right dick uh per capita we are way higher than china but in total we're like half. Not even half. It's because we don't have many people living Unabomber style in the woods, whereas these countries

with a big poverty ratio, they don't have a big environmental impact living off of them. Saudi Arabia leading the charge per capita. Economy. The wealthier you are, the cooler shit you got burning.

I am not in a position to talk shit about carbon footprint. I can only imagine what I am sitting here. Not good. This is reliable because all this info is from the Union of Concerned Scientists. I mean, this is a low-impact job, though. It's not like you're out there driving a truck

and feeding America We're just sitting in our asses talking That's low carbon footprint man I guess job wise I agree I mow my yard with a tractor though That's gotta be a thing I like to burn trash It's on half an acre

It's one of my few creature comforts I enjoy burning garbage We buy too much stuff from Amazon to put it all in those recycling things. I would need to get a second dumpster to deal with all my Amazon boxes. Once a month, I gather them all up, haul them back to my dad's place,

and we have a big bonfire of Amazon boxes. I order so much shit off Amazon that, first of all, my girlfriend was like, I think you need to slow down on the Amazon. That's a little bit too much. You gotta order a new girlfriend. With my left hand, so it didn't count.

Three pieces of soda, I hope. Yeah, three pieces of fucking biscuit. That's what that video was. I have so many boxes that I'll just collect them. Initially, I put them all out there loose, and they blew. My whole street had

boxes all over the place like an hour later and i'm like with your name on them yeah i'm on this guy now thumbs down from now on what i've done is i'll like take all of them and i take cheap ass duct tape i also ordered on amazon and i tape i tape all of the cardboard into a big thing because it's very windy here in miss. And so I tape all of that together until it's about the size of a smart car, a Civic. It's very large. And I set that in front of my house next to my trash can. And I intentionally don't make myself visible

when the garbage men come because I don't think that's their preferred method of... Yeah. Will they pick that up up they have so far yeah i don't know what my garbage will pick up and what they won't pick up like i i have that fear like i have an old bed frame that needs hauling off and i i i don't want to take it to the end of my driveway and then have to drag it back up into my house the next night like tonight's garbage night i don't know what they'll take so i just just use my dumpster full of garbage.

My garbage men effectively put the fear of God into me. When we first bought this house, we didn't even move in. That's the relationship you want with your refuse collector. For the first three or four months, we didn't live here. We just renovated it and renovated it. And I don't

know. For whatever reason, we had a pedestal sink. This is what I assume is a porcelain pedestal sink and I put it in the garbage can you know those big you know everyone has the same garbage can you fit like maybe three dead bodies in it and I closed the lid on it and thought you know cool if it fits in the

garbage can we're set I thought that was the requirement then they don't take it. And then they call me on my phone. And they're like, Woody, we can't take that sink you put in there. The blades behind the thing that, like, smushes them up could get damaged by it. And you need to find another way to dispose of it. And it's like, what?

You were popping open the lid on my trash and looking inside? Now, I have put things on the bottom hidden video that i know they don't want even big rocks rocks yeah yeah you're throwing rocks away fucking bigger than a human head throwing away landscape yeah yeah because it'll be like you know motherfucker you have chipped my blade one too many times you were going to the trash but the bottom of the trash and no one will know but but yeah that now i know that my garbage men they they inspect it before they put it in the thing how frustrated do you think they are when they upturn your normal looking garbage can and

two boulders tumble out and they have to be like this fucking asshole i like to think they yell at me this guy's throwing away rocks i've been trying to throw away a direct tv satellite for like a year and a half i pulled off the roof after i moved in but it's i couldn't cram it in there i tried like hooking it on the side so it would kind of get stuck and get dragged along that didn't work and so then i just i just let it become part of the uh landscape i was like when i was like in college it's very classy by the way yes yeah when i was in college oh man i have the worst yard in the block like i'm so as a mexican i'm so embarrassed that my yard turned into the one that my girlfriend parks in the front yard.

My driveway is wide enough for two cars, but I don't trust her not to open the door correctly and not ding my car. So she parks sideways in the front yard. And now if I go down the street, you look at it, it's like weeds up to your hips because i'm lazy and like i don't know how but you're mexican right shouldn't your yard be the best one you've got that landscaper gene coursing through your blood is this like is this like the the cobbler's children right where everyone else has shoes but not his own kids it's exactly like that my dad even gave me a mexican starter kit like my dad passed down the used lawn tools that his dad passed down to him like the leaf

blower and the weed whacker and some kind of a hedge trimming saw i can't i just can't touch like i refuse to touch them oh that's great part of your heritage, Dex. You must dream. I drive by Home Depot and all the day laborers just give me the thumbs down as they drive by. I'm like, ah, fuck you guys. You know, you know, you know. Race trader. See, it's the mustache that seals

the deal for you. You could just shave that off and people would be like, look at that white trash guy. I bet he likes nascar yeah he's the one guy into f1 i bet he's got a case of natural light somewhere on ice have you guys ever gone to somewhere public with a dumpster and used it on your own i think so it's great only the smallest business when i was like when i was like 19 or something i was leaving my first apartment in college

to move into a different one. And I had a fuck ton of shit that I needed to throw away. And so I loaded up my entire car, trunk, every seat, all this just crap. Because all the dumpsters around my place were full. And so I was like, oh, I got a good idea. I'm going to drive to a Taco Bell because they've got a big dumpster.

I'm going to do that. And so I drove to this place and i'm just like brazenly parking right next to their dumpster pulling shit out throwing it in pulling it out throwing it in i go home load up for round two go back brazenly filling up this taco bell dumpster. And this guy comes out. He's like, excuse me. Excuse me. I'm like, hey, yeah, what's up? He's like, what are you doing? And I'm like, well, the dumpsters near my apartment are closed.

I needed to throw this away. He's like, you can't just come and fill up our dumpster, sir. And I was like, are you sure? He's like, yeah, you can't do that. You're not allowed. This is our municipal garbage can it's actually a blah blah blah and i was like all right my bad dude i got i got most of it out of here already i'll just go you can keep this stuff that's in there now yeah well i'm not gonna get

this back out but it was just like looking back now it was like oh you retard like i would never do that now but i was just slamming the door open, throwing stuff down in there. Looked like a real white trash asshole. Yeah. I went to the dump when I moved out of a house. I lived in for like five years with two other guys. So, you know, 15 years of guys hoarding things that acquired in that house. We filled up my pickup and a trailer, took it to the actual landfill dump, and had a really great time tossing furniture.

We were pretending that we were caber tossing this. A full-on upright piano. We just rolled it into the landfill while all the trucks and the seagulls were doing their dumping rounds. For some reason, it's one of the most fun memories of my life just unloading a truck with a i've done that maybe that's what india is up to we cannot let the rest of the world know how fun it is to leave that all over the place i hate it there's always these like able-bodied 29 year old guys they're sitting on a stool watching me struggle to carry like a sectional on my own you know just like dragging it from from the bed to that like dumping dumpster

that's hard see this is why it's so nice to live in the country like like growing up this was none of these things were an issue oh we have an unusually large piece of garbage that'll make a big fire that'll make a big fire that'll be nice i i have a carpet i have a carpet that's been like we have two trash cans on like the side of the house and the carpet's been sitting next to those trash cans embarrassingly long amount of time let's just say that it's fully soaked with rain it must weigh 250 now maybe 400 i don't know like it is super heavy it's not carpet it's a rug and uh like i i don't know how i'm gonna handle it i've got hydraulic carts and shit i'm gonna figure this out but i don't know how to throw it away at this point it's been rained on for months burn that

motherfucker it's been rained on for months i would kyle yeah set up some fans it would take some gas gasoline burns through everything like it's just it's like a wet sponge yeah i had a couple of friends uh get tickets for burning trash in their backyard because i guess we must have been like 2021 at the time and it didn't even cross their mind that you can't just burn all of the wood plastic and old ikea furniture in like a and this was at like a college you know those little like cities they'll build on college campuses where everybody fucking lives in in like a bunch of apartments they just did it right in the middle of that i think here's a good when we bought this place the sellers had a fire so big the fire department came and the sellers were just like yeah it's

all under control we're just getting rid of stuff and the fire department is like oh cool my bad that's it yeah that's how i thought i was gonna have to do some work yeah whenever we were gonna do a really big fire we would call and we would get a burning permit a permit to make a fire that's that big okay and uh and then that way they don't show up especially if I was gonna do a thing that involved like burning two or three cars or setting a whole bunch of crazy shit on fire or something like that do you got to pay for that or did that you just call and go hey heads up exactly that's what it is it's is it like like preventing a swatting like do you have to lie about what you're gonna burn no just tell me you know make a

real real big fire today and And if it's too dry, they'll be like, we don't think it's a good idea. Could you wait until next week? In which case, you're like, yeah, we'll wait. And then you start the fire anyway. How do you prevent a SWAT, Dick?

You've done this, I assume? No, when you call the cops and say, yeah, a bunch of people hate me, they're going to call you and try to get me SWATed. That's what you did? Yeah, is that not a thing that people do? I do it, but it doesn't

work that well like i i called the cops and they just bounce me from person to person to person i'm not sure i ever talked to the right one i called 9-1-1 and i'm like hey i hate to bother you it's not an actual emergency but you might get some call when we had um we did a live stream with ice poseidon and I think it's still true. Ice Poseidon is like a super frequent victim of swats and pranks and stuff. And it was like, well, I should make some proactive calls and let them know not to take it relaxed if anyone calls. Good segue, Woody. As we all here know, Ice Poseidon had his place raided by the FBI this week.

Now, I think it's got to be in connection to his Ponzi scheme website because they didn't just come. It doesn't look good. You know, if someone had faked a bomb threat with his number, they'd have shown up and they'd be like, oh, you're not a bomber, I see. Well, good day to you, sir. like they'd have shown up and they'd be like oh you're not a bomber i see well good day to you sir but what they did was they came with a warrant to take all of his electronics and then they did so that that's when they're looking for something that may or may not be within those electronics in his case that ponzi scheme thing sounds seems like the culprit i have a couple factoids and i don't know how they fit together one is on february 24th somebody wrote

on the ice poseidon 2 subreddit and this is confirmed that on march 20th the ship was going to go down and it did so they predicted this almost a month in advance he said i can't say too much more and i want anyone to figure out who i am but on march 20th he'll get his and then like that just seems like too much of a coincidence people don't predict that every day the other thing is i've heard that's very specific right and then i've also heard also i think february 24th predates the ponzi scheme implying maybe it's not that um and then the other one i heard is that someone spoofed his phone number and called in bomb threats if that's the case and it's not very serious, right? He's just innocent and everything is fine.

It seems like they could figure that out pretty easy. The spoofed phone thing. Is that a thing? Maybe I'm overestimating that. I don't even know what spoofed phone means. I think it is a thing because half of my robocalls look like they're from my wife or some other number near me. I hate that now. I can put an app on my phone and I can make it seem like anybody

I want is texting or calling you. Huh. I didn't know you could do that. That's great. I could lie about that all day. No, honey. That was... That's Kyle.

He keeps doing it. Another booty call from Kyle. Look out this clip. Oh, and then there's an attorney on the internet, so you don't know what he is, but he assured us that if they're investigating crime number one and they find crime number two, you're still in hot water. Yeah. Okay. Well, my counterpoint to that is when White Boy Savage Street got raided, he got swatted, right? So he didn't do anything wrong,ided he got swatted right so he didn't do anything wrong but he got swatted and while he got swatted they found marijuana in his house he eventually got off

scott free because they found the marijuana through improper means yeah that's totally different crime because like if like if they show up and they're like all right well we did all the research and mr mahogany did not cheat on his taxes at all but he's got a lot of child porn on his computer unfortunately that's not why we served you initially mr so you're free to go but that's doesn't sound like it would be in the news i know i hear what you're saying and i think how's about to say this too that like you know there's difference because he they weren't supposed to be there he didn didn't do anything wrong. But if they find him innocent of crime one and stumble upon crime two... It's completely different, though.

There's a difference between the police coming at you legitimately for crime number one and the police coming at you because someone made a prank phone call. But if crime number one is not a thing you did, then is it... That doesn't matter. Okay, so you think, all right, well, look, I'm outside my debt. Like, in his case, there was a warrant. They were like, emergency, emergency, come to this residence. And so they did.

But in Ice's case, it's clear there was a warrant involved because they took his things. Well, it's like if you get pulled over speeding and they smell weed, you can get busted. Like if they catch any other evidence of there being weed, then you can get busted for that. Right, Woody? That does sound more parallel to the spoof call thing. But how do you get a warrant for a spoofed call? Is that something the FBI's doing warrants on now? I feel like all you need to do is get the judge's

approval and based on shit i've seen about judges they don't understand anything about how technology works with the internet like who's that who's that fucking retard who was like i can't get mr apple how why doesn't my phone work he's like well you're holding a Samsung S7. Yeah. Yeah, I know. You're a member of the smartphone company. He was talking to a Google executive upset about, I think it was, I think he was talking to a Google executive and he was upset that Apple News showed unfavorable stories about him. And by the way, I think it was Stephen King, the racist dude who got stripped of all his

committee appointments and tweets out the white power guys all the time. And one of his fellow congressmen was like, dude, if you want good news about you, do better things. That's the reason that you're in the news negative all the time is because of your racist ties. I don't know who it was. I think he was really old, though. Well, and completely different news. That's also a bit of prankery on the internet. Someone ordered wings a couple of whores This week

Did they at least pay for them up front? Someone ordered Wings a couple of whores And they showed up at his house They drove all the way from Myrtle Beach to Wings' house They were like, hey daddy And he was like, aw shit Did the whore call him daddy? No

I don't know what they fucking called him. I like it. I like it too. I'm going to believe that to be true. I guess he had to drive him back to Myrtle Beach. I'm not buying that. Why would he have to drive the whore?

I don't understand that. Wings was, being the chivalrous gentleman that he is, he took the whores to a motel 6 Where they would be safe Yes They didn't have to give their money back So of course he fucked them

I mean if he hadn't fucked them He might have hurt their feelings Yeah Imagine being turned down Imagine being turned down by Wings You'd slit your wrists Don't talk. I feel bad. Imagine being turned down by Wings. You'd slit your wrists. Don't say that. I feel bad for Wings.

I know I'm the blue man rager, but Wings sells his mental health. That's what he does for a living. That's what Ice does for a living. And it's easy to look at them and be like, oh my God, you get to sit in your room and earn a living. I would kill for that. But the people who say that have never sold their mental health for a living and i understand it's it could be rough and i i just i feel for him completely different wait oh yeah

wing cells is mental health because he's you know not good at what he does and like like that's he's just kind of like falling does. He's just kind of fallen ass backwards into the role of selling his mental health. Ice is a ringmaster over there. Oh, you think? Oh, yeah. He's the least embarrassing person on those streams.

He's the one who's clearly getting pussy and clearly making money. Surrounded by a group of people who are getting neither pussy nor money. He is the Howard Stern of his group. He's more like the Barnum and Bailey. What is the Howard Stern? Whack Pack.

He has a Whack Pack around him of people who are just either fall down drunk. Those people are selling their mental health. Only Use Me Blade is having a fire sale on his mental health. And physical health. Oh, yeah.

You might not know Only Use Me Blade, but Only Use Me Blade was... Do you know Only Use Me Blade? I think the only person I know in this group that you're talking about is Corinne. Is that a name in the pack? Yeah, she's in the group. Okay, so Only Use Me Blade was one of the top streamers in like the COD 4 world, right?

When gaming was first growing on YouTube. And he played Call of Duty and only used a knife. It was pretty neat to see. And he's like a really chill dude and he had really good commentaries that went with it. And then since then, he's fallen into trouble with alcoholism. since then he's fallen into trouble with alcoholism and so much like people will donate to see him get too drunk and then he can do things that are embarrassing that that you would really frequently pees and poops himself yeah yeah you know so wait the poop thing was a one-time thing i mean so far give him time

and it's hard to discern but i i look at like and i think ice also sells his mental health i watch ice cry on stream and i don't think it's all fake i watch ice he just gets shit on by his fans and i think that most people don't understand like when you get that on the scale that he does even the thick-skinned people they get it it penetrates yeah yeah you can't ignore it i've read uh i've read the subreddit and reduced to like that sick feeling in my stomach all day just with a couple comments i can't imagine getting what some of these guys do the non-stop negativity like you gotta have maybe there's just something like wrong with his brain like something short-circuiting where it doesn't affect him but it's gotta you gotta be back to

wings though like like it's kind of funny that they sent him the whores i guess it's mildly entertaining to to us but imagine if he had been like all right guys you gotta see this and he'd fucking taking you with him to the door and been like this is crystal and this is diamond and uh ladies why don't you tell us what you're doing here today hey daddy we we here to make you happy that's and he turns the camera back to himself that's right someone sent me horse dude right in front of him oh i start i would donate for that dude he'd be not just that he'd be such a flippin legend all for that he doesn't have to fuck him if he doesn't want to but if he just don't fuck him why not he can switch his stream over to that

oh that's a fair point. Don't do it. But it would be off-camera. You wouldn't literally be. But if he had been like, how long do I have you girls? 90 minutes? Well, we're about to live stream this. And just hung out with him for 90 minutes.

Interviewed him for 90 minutes. Get a controller in that bitch's hand. He'd be so cool if he just pwned them in rainbow six for the next 90 minutes well my kitchen's pretty dirty you any good at spackling dude i wish he had instead of instead of instantly falling into the victim slot and being like, man, you guys who did this, you got me so good. I'm unhappy.

She's unhappy. This whole situation is a real conundrum. If he had just rocked it and made the best dream ever, it would have gone viral. I wish he had done that. And I don't think it would have cost him mental health. I think the way he did it, he did. The way he did it was like,. No, it would have been funny.

The way he did it was like, gosh, you guys got to stop. There's real life consequences to this. This is worse. If he was just- I can't figure out why he drove them back. They drove there, ostensibly. No, they Ubered there, or cabbed there. Oh, well, then they should Uber back.

They didn't have the money. It was their pimp. That's such a lie. They didn't have the money. Yeah, whore's lie That's such a lie. They didn't have the money. Whore's lie. They do what now, Kyle? Whore's lie. And so does Wings.

They'd have fit in well together. I bet these were some larger gals. Imagine, like, he starts gaming again. He's got one sitting on each knee. Like, they're all gaming together. Just pay them. Be like, look, no sex here, okay? that's illegal i i can't be part of that but how'd you like to be part of my little live stream in here we play video games and have fun i'll give you each 50 bucks for the hour

then i'll take you back home dude that'd be great but you have to leave clapping so i know you don't steal anything. That would have been great. I'd have fucking loved that. Oh, fuck. I didn't do it right. I tried to pick something up with my mouth. She's squat grabbing it with her pussy like that. Like that claw game.

I don't want to. Where'd my controller go? Wings, if this somehow gets to you and someone does it again, please make them part of the stream. It would be so epic. You'd be legend for it. Just, yeah. That would be really funny. Like, force them to play the game with you.

Even funnier than that, I think, is filming them while you make them do household chores for you. That would make me laugh really hard. Would they, though? Yeah. I mean, they suck dick for a living. I don't know. I'd rather suck dick than do the dishes.

Oh, I'd rather do the dishes, I think. Or fold clothes. Okay, I'd rather suck a dick than fold clothes. Folding wings clothes could be very tiring. I feel like suck dick... Fold clothes is my first choice. Suck dick and socks on the bottom i did like so i definitely rather suck dick than go to the dmv yeah absolutely yeah like if they said

all right here's your take your number you can either wait two hours or you can suck this guy's dick and you just will give you the license we don't even care if you have your paperwork the line for that guy's dick would be out the door. If you go to the DMV here afternoon, you probably won't even be seen that day. It's so backed up. But if I suck dick, we're getting it done in the next 15 minutes. You can even see DMV employees sometimes doing the mental count of like, all right, we're on 51. There's 170 people here, and there's only four hours left.

If I do one person every four hours, I don't have to do any work. They'll do that level of shit. You can see the wheels turning. That bothers the shit out of me. There's always one person working their ass off actually trying to get shit done. In Jersey, a long time ago, they let the private sector take over the

DMV and it got good. They started rolling along. It got faster and people got fired if they were bad. That's not a thing that happens in the government, I'm told. Yeah, that's the way to do it. I guess so. Yeah. Get in and out. I was just listening to Wings right now.

Bitch can complain about his household expenses. He says he's got to replace a $4,000 air conditioner and he's got to put on a $14,000 roof. Is this how this guy makes money? Just complains about his problems and talks about how sad he is?

It's paying the bills. Dick, I give you credit for catching on so quickly. Yeah, I follow a couple YouTube guys and we're like, I'll find a guy and follow him. And then it's just nonstop tweets about every single tweet about anxiety. And then 100 people telling him how great he is to air his depression out into the world. It's like constant in the YouTube crowd.

Then there's think there's like, would you tweet that and see how our audience responds? Yeah, I don't think they're're gonna be very kind to me just put man i'm feeling so anxious and depressed and but i gotta lead it in like the way that a lot of the times those people do where it's like hey guys i'm prepared for the hate and ready for the backlash but yeah i've been struggling and your support means the world to me and without you guys guys, I don't know what I'd be doing. So keep your head up when you're feeling down, guys. Know that I struggle too. No, no, no, no, no, no.

It's got to only be about you. It's not about helping anybody. It's just no video today because I just, I've got to admit this may be, and people might take this the wrong way, but I just don't even feel like creating content anymore. I barely feel like living. So I just need to take a day for me taylor would you please do this i'll draft that up i think they're gonna like uh uh call me a cunt and say i deserve it

i'll tweet like totally but like that's the kind of fan base like we've cultivated here and I like that I like that because like I'll tweet something like just like genuine I'll be like man this blues game's intense I can't believe it's blah blah blah and some of the first response will just be you're a fat headed retard

well if you like it that's great that's funny because I know they're, well, they're probably not joking. By the way, I like your trolling t-shirts. This week it's the Flat Earth Society. Last week it was Colin Kaepernick taking the knee. Yeah. Yeah, I think it was like two weeks ago. I was drinking with friends, and then I got home and was still drunk,

and was like, oh, you know it would be a good idea to spend a hundred dollars on joke t-shirts to like it was like the next day like probably 10 p.m. and I was just sitting there and I had that Amazon thought where I was like you ordered a bunch of shit last night and you didn't even remember so I went in too late to cancel any of it so now i'm in d i've got i won't reveal this one but this one my girlfriend said you you're not wearing that outside the house are you uh and so it's going to be good if you can see it oh no just in front of a hundred thousand people well the majority of listeners forget the 50 people who would see me outside the house

no i i got the flat earth shirt because it was right after i'd watched the flat earth documentary on netflix which is fucking hysterical these people are the best and i was reading through their website trying to discern if it's like like how much how much of flat earth society.org or tfes.org is real and how much of this shit is just put on they let me see their answers for shit are insane let me see oh this is how they respond to to pictures like there are many pictures and in the internet link it so i can share it with people yeah yeah oh sorry sorry it's my first time on the podcast, Woody. My mistake. Yeah, their answer to the...

Oh, yeah. There are many pictures on the internet and in other media depicting the Earth as being round. Why do these not disprove the Flat Earth Theory? Answer. In general, we at the Flat Earth Society do not lend much credibility to photographic evidence. It is too easily manipulated and altered. Many of the videos posted here to prove

around Earth by showing curvature will show no curvature or even concave curvature at points. The sources are so inaccurate it's difficult to build an argument on them in either. This is written so badly. This is written by someone who believes the Earth is flat. I believe it now. But the end

of the documentary, they have this big retard convention and they all get there together and they're all talking about the flat earth and then they do this experiment where they take a pole they stick it in the ground exactly six feet up and then they go two miles away and exactly or like three miles something no it's like six miles or something, like over a body of water. Like six miles away, they make sure it's exactly the same amount in. Both posts are exactly six feet in the ground, and they both have holes cut over the top. And so the guy's explaining, he's like, well, this is a classic experiment. It's been done many times to prove our point.

What happens is we'll have someone looking from one hole, six miles that way, and then we will lift the light to shine through the hole. And when they can see that light, then they'll know that the earth is flat because obviously there's no curvature there. But if he has to lift the light up more to the second post that's higher up, the second hole, then we would know hypothetically that the earth is

round and so like the last little clip of the entire documentary is them on radios going like yeah go ahead uh steve hold that light up hold it up and it shows you can't see you can't see any light coming through and he goes this is weird man you're holding at the hole through and he goes this is weird man you're holding at the hole uh lift it up and hold it to the second hole and then you see the light immediately and it just the guy goes man and the documentary ends yeah that's interesting he's just like yeah it's real that's it that's the whole thing it was so great because it just showed all it took was 30 minutes and a little bit of gumption to prove this whole thing wrong. But they've got these huge conspiracies about it.

My favorite one is the Ring of Ice where their explanation is they're like, first of all, the Earth is not only not round, this heliocentric Galileo nonsense is also not true. You know, the sun revolves around us. But we can't get to the edge of the Earth because of the ice wall. And everyone we know about who's ever gone to the ice wall or tried to get past it has never returned. Dude, if the ice wall was real,

it would be the world's most popular tourist attraction. Everyone would go to the ice wall or the edge all the time. Well, see, that's because we're all fools. We're idiots. We think that it's our Antarctica. We think that just because you can physically sail around it without encountering any of the other land masses, if you wanted to, proves that somehow. But no, it's actually flat.

People have been to space. How have they not discovered the Earth is flat? But no, it's actually flat. People have been to space. How have they not discovered the Earth is flat? The most commonly accepted explanation is that the various space agencies around the world are involved in a conspiracy faking space travel. That's a lot of people keeping a secret. Those people are trolls.

The thing about these flat Earth people is you've got a very small group of real stupid people, and you've got a much larger group of people who are trolling. So I don't even like looking into it anymore, because at first I was like, ah, I'm smart. I'll show the dummies that I'm smarter than them, because I know that the earth is round. But then it's like, oh, that's what they want you to do.

They might as well be doing fucking this. Yeah, so they can punch you in the arm when they look at it. Doing this number and then laughing when you tell them, hey, that's white power i won't have that and they're just he he this guy thinks it's white power now punch him in the arm because that's what it is yeah they know they know the earth is fucking round kyle laid out the white power history thing so perfectly on pkn like it i i want it for the broader show so people can hear it. The setup was that for that New Zealand shooter, who I don't really want to talk about.

I want to piggyback on his fame on the main show. But he put a lot of internet meme and shit posting in his manifesto. So he kind of had to be an internet expert to know what was real and what was just shit posting. And Kyle, like just, can you, do you want to do it again? Yeah, I can.

You know, it's, it's, it's this, you know, you hold this up and, and like, uh,

if you're, if you're my age, that was always a game we played in like middle school, even maybe in an elementary school. And it's like, Hey, if you can, so I was like,

Hey, look at this. And you'd look down and if you looked at it, they got to punch you in the arm. And that's all that's ever meant. That's what it does mean. But what's happened on the internet is like... The upward one is

the okay. The downward one is that you get to punch him in the arm. Because you hide the downward one by your crotch, and then you go, ah-ha! And then you punch him. Yeah. But, you know, what happened on the internet was, some people started saying that that was white power as a troll. And they convinced some other people that it was white power. And those people got mad.

Because it looks like WP if you hold it right. Yeah, I suppose so. Like a gang sign. Like, yeah, we're WP. White power. And that's not how white power people even roll, right? They're not into any gang signs or anything. They're not rocking the west side.

I don't know. I can think of one. All right. In any case, it started out like that. That was the first gang sign. Thumbs down is indicative of white supremacy because it assumes that the white person doling out the thumbs down is in any position of privilege to say, you don't know that person's garbage situation, Woody. You thumbsing them down

is a form of supremacy. Ah, my bad. Some people started saying that it meant white power as a troll, and then some people started believing that it meant white power. And they were fools. They were fools. And so, the people who wanted them to believe that

love that shit. But it doesn't mean that at all but it doesn't mean that at all it doesn't mean that at all it's but but but the people who do believe it have been have been trolled into believing that that's no you let it out more then there were some people who were into white power who actually adopted it so the people who set it up as trolls suddenly like weren't trolling anymore they were just telling people about that that this means white power now and at this point it's this big mess of confusion like does it mean white power does it not mean white but white power people are doing like it's like hitler did nothing wrong

like people who don't believe that say that just to mess with people it's like i mean i mean look it was the mountain dew flavor back in the day. There's very little difference between waving high and waving high-o! You know? Look, it's all about the context. It's really easy to determine if someone means white power or not. If they're wearing a hood, you know, and they call themselves the Grand Cyclops, and they're rocking one of these,

chances are, not childhood shenanigans, they mean white power alright Pepe the Frog did it Pepe the Frog Pepe the Frog started as a really cool meme right like people liked it it was a replacement for I forget the name of the

troll face guy Chelsea Clinton there was a name for the meme troll face guy wasn't the one I'm thinking but. It was also black and white stick figure type thing and they would use different memes. Rage guy I think was one of them. And then it kind of got supplanted in popularity with Pepe

the Frog, which was just a silly meme that people used on 4chan. They all pretended it was cool. And then the news started saying white nationalists were using it and then white nationalists started using it and then white nationalists started using it and then a thing that really had an innocent birth got adopted by people who weren't so innocent and it became hard to tell where it belonged what people who aren't like um

steeped in our internet culture don't understand is that it's it's a group of provocateurs and so they will take anything and try to make it like the thing that is most repugnant to you, whether that's white nationalism, any sort of blatant racism, you know, the N word or whatever, they'll throw that in your face. They'll throw gore in your face. They'll throw CP in your face. And that's meant to like make you an other and to make you fear to go into their little lair where they're really just going to talk about their shenanigans and the stuff that they enjoy. It's all about being

part of a community and being able to identify the other. I think old people do that on Facebook with fake news. It is constantly provocateur. I'm convinced that you're part of a Facebook group that's all trolling you. When they post that, like the Fords from my grandma type posts about like, like, like those

are so funny, the devil or something like that. If you look closely here, you'll see horns sprouting from Dick or it'll be, it'd be Hillary in your case. If you look closely here, Hillary Clinton's pupils turn into reptilian slits for a brief moment when the camera flashes, and they're all like, I'm sold. It's a funny idea, but the truth is boomers love their right-wing fake news. They just fucking love it. They jerk off to it every day.

I see pies posting on their own wall. Every five minutes, they've got another one to go with. I think they like their left-wing stuff, too. I think that they enjoy propaganda. That could be true, but they're not friends with me. And it's not true. The right-wing guys are ten times more. You're part of a group of wealthy guys with a lot of

extra time on their hands. They're most likely going to be successful people, and therefore conservatives. I mean, this has been looked into a hundred times and it's always old boomers who love the right wing fake news. There are not as many left wing fake news sites. It just, that doesn't proliferate.

I don't know. There's a bunch of trash. You've been to Reddit? Yes. And a pretty big one. Yeah. I don't know. It depends on your point of view it it can be skewed easily

and and the stuff that really upsets us is the stuff that that always will catch your eye you know like but i know exactly the group of people what he's talking about like people sharing ironically like the the fucking gateway pundit and shit like that yeah yeah like i think that maybe i'm wrong maybe that's not the one I'm thinking of. I think that's a really out there. Right wing. Yeah. Boomer rag.

Dude, people unironically post like as sources, the Russian times and Sputnik news. These are Russian government. Oh, Russia today. Well, that's legitimate news organization.

I don't know about Sputnik though. Um, first set. Russia today is literally owned by it's a Russian government owned site yeah you can't use it as proof to prove that they didn't collude with Trump or something

it's RT is what it really is I remember when I passed them whenever I passed them in subscribers my channel used to be, quote unquote, based in Russia. So I'd get those silly YouTube rewards. It'd be like, number one most viewed in Russia today. And I'd be like, yeah, nice, nice. And then suddenly I was

number one most subscribed Russian channel in the world because I was pretending to be based in Russia. And Russia today complained about me. And they moved me to the US. Is there any advantage to be in a different country like that like an easier to be number one subscribed in i don't know i just thought the little the little accolades were funny that it would post on the side of your channel you know

it'd be like 15th most viewed in russia today 15 you know 20th most favorited like whatever it was i was always winning those because you know it's russia it's it's a it's they're a bit agrarian you know in a lot of ways it's a pretty small economy it's it's it's i i love when obama was trashing them back in the days their uh their major their major exports are uh oil and firearms um it's it's seven billion people very small economy not much of a threat and seven billion people seems like a lot. That's how many people are in the world. So that is incorrect. Yeah. Everyone.

Yeah. Whatever he said. It was fun. It was fun to see him. Because I know that Putin was steaming over there. Putin's a scary motherfucker. You know Putin was KGB, right? Maybe that's a really well-known thing. He's also short, and so he's mad about it's he's part of that old guard he's short short short

he doesn't talk as like he didn't he doesn't talk as tough as i thought he would either i saw him the first the first clips of him i've ever seen speaking were in that this icarus documentary about when they faked the sochi olympics when they cheated at the sochi olympics and when i heard him talk i was like oh wait a minute wait a minute this is like he sounded a lot more effeminate than i thought he would sound fuck that he's scary as fuck but when i've seen him speak he was in he was investigating some he was like he was at like a building site and like there were a couple of like billionaires with him that were that were like like ran this thing and it was behind schedule and there were a couple of like billionaires with him that were that were like like ran this

thing and it was behind schedule and there were news cameras there too and and they're speaking russian but it's being translated quickly at the bottom and he's like so how far behind schedule and they're like um 13 months behind schedule and how far over budget uh you know uh 800 million rubles and he's like and why is this and well we don't understand the we think there may be there's some issues with the supply you know we sometimes we can't get our uh our supplies fast enough and sometimes labor uh labor costs change they keep labor costs keep changing they keep going up and down and we feel like there may be some manipulation he's like oh okay could you give me the names of the people who are doing these things? Well, you know, Vasili.

Ah, I know Vasili. Well, yes, yes, yes, Vasili. He was like getting to the, it wasn't like how like maybe a U.S. president would be like, yeah, we need to enact some change here. Maybe there can be a law passed or maybe Congress can look into this. He was like, what are their names? Who do I need to take care of here? Vasili shortchanging you on labor?

Well, I'm going to cut his fingers off. He seemed like a real scary guy. He literally orders people to be murdered, you know? He does do that. I'm gonna vote for whatever candidate publicly calls Putin a manlet. I don't care if that's Putin is a well-known manlet.

I have stood next to him. You know I've spent time in the soviet union as fuck look at his shoes next time he's standing on stage it's embarrassing this fucking manlet we'll show him how it's done there's all right count me a bernie bro there is a woman who like he came up to like in protest almost to putin and she like lifts her top and shows her boobs to putin and he goes he's he's very good at uh at optics um you know and and that's another thing from the old guard that's sort of propaganda wing of the kgb he knows what looks good and he knows what's attracted to his people and that's a very like uh

manly man uh father figure leader type guy and that's what he embodies in every single thing he does you know if he's if there's a laying of the reef ceremony for some fallen russian soldiers and it's pouring rain he's like oh perfect perfect it's pouring rain is there any lightning oh excellent could we make some could we make some more lightning yes turn the lightning up all right and he'll walk out there with that getting being drenched no no no umbrellas get the fuck away from me what am i a faggot no no get the umbrellas away from me turn the rain up a little more all right make my hair like pour down my my ears yeah all right now i'm gonna do this real solemnly i'm gonna look at such a badass he knows he looks like a badass when he's out there in the rain.

And then they post a picture of Donald Trump with an umbrella over him like, look at this pussy. Trump skipped. What event did he skip that he took all the heat for? It looks very chilly out here. He doesn't have good wind hair. He has terrible wind hair. No, I debate that.

He has the best wind hair. I mean, if you're trying to tell direction or something, maybe. Oh my god. His wind sock hair. I wonder if he's ever going to give it up. I wonder if there's ever going to be a period where he just shows up and he's just completely bald.

How would he look? Oh, he'd look ghoulish. I mean, that'd be... I don't know, actually. I'll tell you what he'd look likehoulish. I mean, that'd be... I don't know, actually. I'll tell you what he'd look like. Remember Everybody Loves Raymond? Like, the father. Like, Raymond's father from Everybody Loves Raymond.

He'd look like that, but much more ghoulish. Frank Boyle? It's easy to underestimate how fat Trump is. Like, Trump is... He's a big guy. Lots of people comparing me to Frank Boyle. Frankly, I think it's a good show. I wish he hadn't died. I'd love to see Raymond and his brother's antics.

It baffles me how long Trump has lived. He doesn't have the physique of a guy that makes it deep into his 70s. Is he 72? Yeah, 72 or 73 at this point. His physique being talked about on that doctor letter. There was another one brought out

where like i think he actually like did he get did he grow did president drum grow an inch i'm hitting third puberty yeah that's that shit's so funny because they'll clearly low-balling his weight. And they're overdoing his height. He claims to be 6'4". I think Obama claimed to be 6'2". Yet he's a good two inches taller than Trump. No.

Trump's tall. Trump claimed to be 6'3". Obama claimed to be 6'1". And you can find pictures of them standing next to each other, and it's very clear. They're pretty much exactly the same height. Trump's got an extra inch of probably head. Yeah, Trump's got an inch on him.

Yeah, he's maybe a little bit taller than Obama, but if Obama's 6'1", Trump is not 6'3". Are Trumps a lot taller than me? I say Obama's got an inch on him. I'm seeing a couple pictures on Inauguration Day. How tall are you, Dick? I'm six feet tall even. When I met him, I was looking up at him. I'm seeing a couple pictures on Inauguration Day. How tall are you, Dick? I'm six feet tall even. When I met him, I was looking up at him. Okay.

I'll tell you one thing that's not debatable, alright boys and girls? Trump's wife is much hotter than Obama's. Well, she was a supermodel. Well, he's on his third one. I mean, if Obama upgraded twice... Obama's hotter than his wife

i'm i'm gonna co-sign that if to be fair obama is better looking than trump yeah i think obama's a good looking guy yeah for sure he's one of the better looking presidents we've ever had you know like he's top ten for sure oh yeah we've talked about it the ugliest one was uh who was it, Taft? No, Nixon. Nixon was an ugly fuck. Nixon was a hideous fucking ghoul of a man. Yeah, with the ears and the pock marks and the nose. His awful nose.

Wait, what about his voice was horrible? What is it, Taft? He was like 600 pounds. He broke the bathtub in the White House. Yeah. I think he did it twice. That's an impeachable offense you freaking bathtubs that the taxpayer paid for you are they allowed to switch all that shit out in the white house like every time a new president comes in are they allowed to be like all right

honestly i don't know what the obamas were doing with this bathroom it's fucking horrible i want gold everything all gold everything like that song i think there's a limit to it i think it's mostly like um like like rugs and tapestry and all the art can be swapped out they have access to like a huge um pile of art that they can select from all the drapes and the curtains and the all that stuff like the stuff that's cloth for sure the cart the carpets the rugs. The desk is a big one that actually gets talked about a bit. There's a whole bunch of desks from past presidents. Kennedy's desk is laying around, and Lincoln's desk is laying around. You can pick one of those. You can be like, I want that desk.

I want to rock the Thomas Jefferson desk. Oh, dude, it's so sad that in the future at some point, some president's going to take out the Thomas Jefferson bus to put a fucking Iron man pop figurine there that was one of those lies they were talking about a collection do you remember that when they were neat in the early 2000s do you remember when they were lying about trump and saying that he had had the um the martin luther king bust removed and had had it replaced with like, I don't remember, maybe Andrew Jackson or something like that. And then they cut to a picture of the Martin Luther King bust,

like still sitting there and everything. Yeah. I don't remember that one. It's hard to remember all the shit that's like, ah, this is happening. And then they're like, oh, actually rats. We got ahead of our skis. Can they tint the windows in the White House? With a bubble tin, you know themselves with a credit card like

Baron out there doing it himself. Ah fucking bubbles. Oh well Now in Woody's picture here Obama definitely in my opinion looks taller Although what the thing that really stands out to me is just how unattractive our vice president's wife is oh i didn't i didn't zoom in on it's just me i can't share pictures i tried it for like i don't know what happened it's the monitor capture is not working anymore well just google ugly vice president's wife you'll knock it out of the park um god, it must suck to be in her shoes. Like, not literally, because those look like comfortable shoes. But it must suck that she...

They're very sensible shoes for a sensible woman. Meanwhile, Melania's wearing these light blue pumps that match her Jackie Kennedy fucking light blue dress and her gloves. Melania's doing invisible-to-the-eye leg lifts. She calls them birds. She looks so fucking good. She's doing Kegels non-stop. She looks

so fucking good. Please continue. I just want to keep talking about how hot Melania Trump is. The way she fills out that Look at her thighs. Look at her calves. I meant to say. She is well put together.

I wonder what her workout routine is because she's not sitting around doing nothing. She's not one of those rich ladies who's just like, well, I've made it. She knows the axe could be coming at any time. There could be Miss Trump number four. She knows she's like a leased car. That's right.

And it's getting towards the end. Say what you will about Mike Pence and his wife. I guarantee they have a much happier marriage probably they probably have a healthy life at home, they probably enjoy each other they're very in love

I don't think Melania even likes him oh I bet she does why? he's hilarious she wouldn't be seen with him after the funniest man on earth after the more recent porn stuff she canceled all her like joint travel arrangements with him they don't say her bedroom they i mean they don't they're just well you don't know that you don't know that's probably widely known and accepted if i had 10 billion dollars i would sleep by myself i would have a whole house to myself. Fuck that.

The reason is when he's like, this doesn't seem like a good one for both of us. It's going to be windy. Stay at home. Don't look on that plane. It's a surprise for you. I gave you Rhode Island. We're going to call it Melodiatown now.

It's fine. You can't read English. That's a smoking hot lady right there yeah all of his wives have been real hot marla maples was fucking hot they have but i feel like by is it by picking older ones along the way and i'm not even sure this is true but by seeing her at 47 i'm making that up maybe he knew what he was getting into her old age right anyone can pick a hot girl at 18 and have no idea what 57 will yield but if you pick a hot girl at 48 then you know how she's going to do for the next 20 years you already saw it it's right there that's true and that's i mean like that's how melania is so hot because you know as trump entered i don't know when he

got with melania 60 something like that um you know when he got with Melania, 60, something like that. He was able to pick one he knew would age well because she had already started aging. How old is she? And Obama was thinking like someday in my old age, I'm going to want to start a furniture moving business and I need a sturdy gal to be there backing me up. Talk about having a better marriage.

Obama's marriage is a million times better than Trump's is. I don't know. I don't know how we can do this. You have to be insane to think otherwise. No, you would have to be different than you. I want to be married to Trump.

For all you know, Melania For all you know, Melania For all you know, Melania loves for him to bring home smoking hot whores and fuck them while she watches. And that is her greatest turn on in life. She's like, oh, Donald, I love when you bring home the playboy models and the whores and you fuck them and let me laugh. I've told you so many times to stop impersonating that Schwarzenegger whore. That could be what she loves.

You're 10 different kinds of delusional if you think there's even a 1% chance of that. She's a model. Models are fucking crazy. You are too. Yeah. You're making jokes or you're 10 different kinds of delusional? Because there is no way. And by the way, when it went public that he was fucking Stormy Daniels

back when she was caring for their newborn kid, she canceled all her travel plans with him and wouldn't be seen next to him. Yeah, sure. It's pretty embarrassing for that to go public. But that doesn't mean that she didn't know it the whole time and wasn't into it. Oh, you think that's the case? She encouraged it.

She may have picked that one out. She may have been like, yes, get that one for me. I think that's a bit of a... You're just imposing your own moral standpoint upon this thing. It's a very common moral standpoint not to like to be fucked around on in your marriage. Like in private,

Mike Pence is probably flagellating himself while his wife cries in a corner or something like that. Mike, why? Did you just say he's probably doing that? I think you did. I looked at another woman with lust in my heart. Oh, not again, Mike. I just imagined his back covered in scars. I had lust in my heart.

Probably Melania married for money, and now she's earning every penny. I don't think there's a probably about it. I think she probably... Supermodels always marry rich dudes for money. Yeah, but they think that means that they don't have to actually earn it. And then comes the embarrassment and the horribleness

and the realization that like, this just isn't the, it would have been nicer to have a life with a good husband than what she has instead. Now it seems like wish casting a bit yeah i don't think so i never met somebody who actually thinks this stuff really absolutely yeah oh please i totally she bats away his hands when he when he tries to hold her hand she does she did i i don't i don't buy into it all that she's like, oh, you please, please pick out the hot one.

I want to watch you fuck her. I don't care about that. I bet she's definitely livid when that kind of stuff comes out. Even if she didn't know, it's humiliating as fuck. Why? She's hot. She's used to people shitting on her constantly. She's a hot woman. What does she care? That's a good point.

And she also can't read English. That's not a good point. Wait, she's hot? So she's used to people shitting on her yes hot women are used to taking the bitterness of everybody in the world at all times the jealousy and resentment of everyone

in their lives at all times constantly they don't give a shit if trump's getting shit on that's quite the theory she's hot so she's used to everyone treating her badly. Because that's the burden that hot women suffer with. Oh, my gosh.

Just suck my balls, you whore. She's probably heard eat a sandwich more than anybody on earth. She's probably accustomed to when she's 75 feet away from a building and some other guy's walking through the door, them waiting to hold it for her. And then if she doesn't fuck them when she's halfway through the door, they go, bitch.

Yeah. Well, not everyone's a fedora wearing nice guy, but, but no, I, um, I would love it.

If in my next lifetime, I was treated like a hot woman. No one's treated better than hot women. Regretting what you think you want. Yeah. You are crazy person. I was treated like a hot woman. No one's treated better than hot women. Regretting what you think you want. No! You are a crazy person. There is no group of the planet who is treated better than hot girls. Hot girls get everything laid out for them.

Tom Brady, quarterbacks. Really rich guys. Hot women, they get things just given to them. Until they're 27 and they're not hot anymore. And then they get shit and then they got nothing. It is a tall fall. And I think that's true with a lot of women.

It might be a little older than 27, but yeah. You go from everyone will do anything for you to invisible i think hot women are openly despised by women who try like they're used to being taken advantage taken in as friends backstabbed constantly tried to fuck constantly by guys who orbit them inside it's like being a they's like being a lottery winner, except they're too stupid to understand

to turn people away when they're teenagers. It's rough, man. It is a lottery that they have won. I agree with you there. But I cannot agree of the hardships that face the beautiful people. Like, oh my God, if you're just a hot girl, it's such a rough situation to be born into man you have no idea all

the shit they take you have no idea all the privilege they get hot chick privilege is the best privilege ever no not better than white privilege hot white chick privilege then i'll pay for my own drinks yeah i mean like this is i remember i used to think like a lot of that exact same stuff and like the sex realm of it because like when i was like 13 or 14 and you're just horned up as fuck all the time and nobody wants to fuck because you're basically just adolescent kids and like you're just thinking like as you get to be like older in high school and everything you're like god chicks have life so easy because obviously everybody thinks about fucking 24 seven all day. If they asked me to fuck right now, I'd say yes. Yes. What time? When? Where?

Here? In class? Get expelled? Of course. But I'll go to jail. And then as I got older, I was like, oh, different priorities. It bothers them to be accosted for sex all the time. But it wouldn't bother me to be accosted for sex all the time. I like the fantasy that they want it just as much. That's my favorite. Like, oh, Taylor, don't you realize those 14-year-old girls wanted it just as badly as you did? Silly you. 14-year-old

me was hornier than any 14-year-old that has ever existed. I had the testosterone rating of a 26-year-old. Prove it. Go back in time and prove your horniness. Put a wig on like Bugs Bunny and see if your 14 year old self will hit on you.

It's also easier when like you realize like you look around at just men and you're like, God, that's gross. Women have to fuck that. Or if you sit next to like a first date and you hear the guy going on and on, you're like, dude, I can't sit here and eat on my food anymore you fucking you're subjecting this woman to this she get the fuck out of here wait i'm very confused are you joining first dates in this scenario dick no you got to sit next you know when you're out and you sit you're eavesdropping on first dates yes i do that i do that every time i was out with my girlfriend the other week never run across that oh i all the time dude we were out of the bar the other week. I never run across that. Oh, all the time, dude. We were out at a bar the other week, and my girlfriend was like, Not a lot of first dates at Wendy's.

Taylor, there's a first date going on. Listen. I treat a lady right. I hold her to me. I do. I agree with you, Woody, about that meme of, oh, no, women want it just as badly, too. They're too shy about saying anything. Like, no, no, you don't. No, you don't. No. I've been both sexes, and I can tell you that guys want it just as badly too. They just don't, they're too shy about saying anything like, no, no, you don't know.

I've been both sexes and I can tell you that guys want it more. Yeah. And my toaster hit my toaster with the flashlight strapped to it, hit on me. I would take, I'm trying to envision that you put the flashlight down into the griddle. I picture the little ready handle popping up and down. It has the basic functions there.

Heating up and kind of pumping. It also prepares food. If it washes dishes, I'll marry it. And guess what? The toaster never fucks up the bread. Wait, it does though. Not if you know the right dial. Ah.

Yeah, see? You may have a higher grade of toaster. Or you do like a little pre-pop, you know, about three quarters of the way in when you're like, ah, I'm not feeling entirely confident on my angle here. You give it a, ah, another 10 seconds. I love toast. the 10 seconds. I love toast. Every now and then I get into a whole toast-like phase where I get all these nice, get really nice Irish cream butter

and I get some fancy jellies and jams and some apple butter maybe too. You go through a toast phase. Yeah, yeah. And I'll wake up early to make breakfast happen. I'll be like, ah, today is a breakfast day and I'll have myself like four pieces of toast and a nice cup of coffee and a little orange juice

and each one will have the different kind of butter or jam on it. And I'll just have a lovely little breakfast. It's good stuff. I've been skipping breakfast. Jam's my jam. I almost always skip breakfast. But then it gets me later because I'll go into lunchtime and be like, you've earned this! And just eat a bunch of trash. Not recently. I've been doing better recently.

I've been doing better too. Every winter I tend to gain some weight and every summer I tend to lose it again. That's where I am now. I could go for some spring weather. God. Oh, it was nice out here today. Like every,

like at some point during every winter, there's a point like getting out of the shower where I see my naked body. And I'm like, this is inappropriate for summertime. You got to get moving. I hit the Santa Claus weight where I can do a full on recreation of does this look like a little weight to you? Every time I walk by the mirror, I'll hear it in my head. And I'm like, oh, you fat fuck, man You gotta stop drinking

Nighttime snacks are my weakness Trail mix in particular I've been very good for a couple of weeks now But it takes more than a couple of weeks To lose your whole winter's worth of fluffing So here I am Wings is gaining weight Get out

He beat the surgery? He beat the surgery,ings is gaining weight. Get out. He already beat the surgery? He beat the surgery. He's gaining weight. No, I don't... I do not believe that. What's your level of confidence? Are you sure that's... Did Wings say it? Yeah. Wait, how much has he gained? He doesn't give numbers.

Okay, well, damn, I thought it took years to possibly revert on this because your stomach's so small. Taylor, would you have a little faith in wings? You're right. I'm OE of little faith. The man's a winner, okay? You know what his KD is? Over three?

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Where do you get your shoes? You want to see a lady lick an airplane toilet seat? Can't, because I can't share my screen tonight. Oh, shit. Oh, no. You've got to see it. I saw it. I can't share my screen tonight. Oh, shit. Oh, no. You've got to see it. I saw it. I've seen it a couple times.

Oh, I thought it was so hot. It's a fetish I didn't even realize I had. I did the thing on Facebook. I saw it on Facebook. And everyone's like, oh, my God, it's so horrible. And there's like 30 comments of just what a nasty girl she is. And I'm like, what? None of you guys are into this? There's one guy typing one-handed, this is horrible.

Don't link me any more videos of things like this. Oh, I wish I went down that. Like, yeah, this is bad. I gotta say, I'm not into the fetish of licking toilet seats. Don't get me wrong. I just think that a girl who would lick a toilet seat is a dirty girl. She's going to lick all sorts of things. Dude, it's not the toilet seat I'm down for.

I'm just down for the kind of girl that licks a toilet seat. You're down for her toilet seat. She's interesting looking. I'll say that. She's sort of cute in an odd sort of way. She's Asian and pretty, right? That's how I remember her. Not at all Asian.

It's been a few days. That's a white lady with an Instagram filter, which actually makes her eyes a little rounder than the average white girl. Very round eyes, nose ring. Pretty girl, but not like a classic beauty or anything. She's kind of interesting looking, I'd say that. Not ugly, not unattractive, but when she a classic beauty or anything. She's kind of interesting looking, I'd say that.

Not ugly, not unattractive, but when she licks that toilet seat with such fervor, that gets me going. Boys, if you're watching the past... It's a fake nose ring. It's the filter. If you watch it again and again, as I have done, it clips out for just a second. Gotcha. Get you a girl that licks a toilet seat out there, boys. If you're wondering if she's marriage material,

get a toilet seat. You'd be surprised how many girls will do it if you tell them to. Pick the lid up. You don't want to mess around. Get you a girl who does it right. Especially if you have a weapon or something, they'll do it. Oh, if you're menacing enough, they'll all lick a oh oh if you're menacing if you're menacing enough the hall like

a toilet seat you'll be surprised how well women respond to overt threats of violence especially especially if you if you threaten something that they really like your face i'm gonna cut your face up if you don't oh they'll get to lapping it up i'm telling you right now oh i loved how she went like her lick She gave a big lick one way and then she doubled back for another big lick the other way That's the trick of the trade that areas my contact to there's no yeah Like how she tried to act like she enjoys it like I hate that in porn and in real life and in this gif I hate that in porn and in real life and in this gif that she's looking at.

You can almost see her throw up, and you can see the disgust in her eyes, but she smiles and tries to pretend like she likes it. I hate that. I wish they would just, you know what I'm saying? You'd rather her look like she's suffering from painal than to pretend she likes the anal. I'd rather her act a little better because Because if I see this, I go, she's not acting correctly. That must have been a stage toilet. I saw someone say,

I've seen Sasha Gray do the same thing. And they were like, that is a stunt toilet seat that they bought brand new for Sasha Gray and brought in just for that porn shoot. They're doing that in a facility. It's brand new. They just bolted it on and then she licked a piece of. They're doing that in a facility. It's brand new. They just bolted it on, and then she licked a piece of plastic.

This is an airplane toilet seat. This is where people take their grossest, most emergency shits. Because nobody is like, you know, should I poop? I probably got a little something in there. Let's get into this shaky tiny room with a lock that looks like it might keep out a gopher. I don't know. There's nothing to suck up the smell, but how will I know that everyone sees me when I come out? Oh, we're on a plane.

Good. That's the guy who went in there 14 minutes ago, and now it smells like Indian food in here. Nothing like one ply toilet paper and 150 strangers waiting on me i've never had to poop on a plane thank you thank god oh i've had to pee enough that like you know when you do that thing when you're peeing and you're like i'm not going to be that guy i'm on the window seat i can i can hold it the next hour i can do it i can do it you get only like 20 minutes away from landing. And it's like, I got to get up now or I'm going to pee on myself and everyone in this row. Like it's go time.

I've done that where I have to run to the bathroom and then I just dropped around pee immediately without pushing the seat up. And I've, because of moving around in the plane, I've pissed all over those seats before an accident. And that woman licked what could have been my pee. So that's absolutely not. Let me paint a picture for you.

I'm pale, so pale and sickly, lips purple, sweat beating down my face like the gif from the Get Out guy. And I cut in front of everyone in line because I'm clearly going to vomit. They look at me and instantly size up that they're okay with it because it's that or here in the hallway. I get on my hands and knees in an airplane toilet and lift the freaking porcelain and it's the yuckiest of yuck.

That's where you don't want to be. That's actually why I fly first class most of the time. I've never been sick in first class. Oh, that's good. If you didn't know, Woody do you get sick almost every flight? It's so hard. It's not that bad. But almost worse.

I get sick on half the flights. So you roll the dice. Don't you fly ultralight? I do. It's not like an ultralight guy? You know what? It seems to be a control thing. Like I don't get sick when I drive, but I can get sick as a passenger.

It's a different kind of motion. It's a different kind of motion. It's a different kind of motion. And I've read something about the way it's affecting your inner ear. I think if you're not facing forward, it can do it. That can be a thing. If you're lying your head over or you're like turned to the side in the passenger seat. I'll tell you the only time I get car sick is if I'm sleeping in the back seat and someone says, hey, don't you get car sick? is if I'm sleeping in the back seat and someone says, hey, don't you get car sick?

Well, I do now. Well, I do now because you mentioned it and it's in my head. And now I'm, yep. Can you read in a car? I can, yeah, I can do. I don't get car sick unless some, if you had said that to me in the car,

well, let me put my fucking phone away. Let's have a conversation now. Well, I won't. Oh, Kyle, you're safe. I'll be the one sleeping over on conversation now. Well, I won't. Oh, Kyle, you're safe. I'll be the one sleeping over on the side. Yeah, I can definitely. I would love to be able to read in a car.

It would be really easy to let time pass, either on your phone or a book or whatever. But if I'm not paying attention. Yeah, have you ever watched movies in the car? I have watched movies in the car. I like that. Like if it's a real long trip, we'd bring the laptop and have the AC adapter so you can keep the thing charged because I don't have an Apple

thing that works all day. And then on planes, I've even taken my laptop and played Civilization because those are like three hours. You're just getting started with the fun, right? So if you're on a six-hour flight, it's like,

oh, I wish it was seven i'm just about to take the byzantine empire over here it could be real handy for those but you got to be first class last thing i want to do is like slide my laptop in between two fatties on either wing or whatever that's that's no good the worst thing is having to read fucking whatever it's called uh sharper image or whatever to fucking nonsense sky mall yeah when you forget your headphones and you can't read on your phone and so you have to sit there and look at and like almost try and convince yourself like you'll be looking at a listing for like an outdoor fire pit that sucks and just to keep your mind occupied you have to try and make

tangents where you're like well if i had a fire pit where would i put it i might put it here does this have the benefits and like you just go to the next listing oh a yard hippo that also holds a bucket i could plant flowers in for three thousand dollars do i need this no but what animal might like all that stupid shit yeah like maybe i'd rather sit in silence all this time i've been sleeping without a refrigerator cooled gel pack blindfold. I like those. That's exactly what the kind of shit they are. I ordered that. Sometimes if I order a Wi-Fi enabled

Wi-Fi enabled blindfold for some reason. If I don't get enough sleep, my eyes get real puffy. This is a $4,000 Bluetooth blindfold. If I don't get enough sleep, my eyes get real puffy and they feel inflamed. I can almost feel the heat coming off of them like i got punched in the eye and uh putting like a cold ice pack on it is like the most refreshing thing ever i don't know if you've ever like i'm we've all walked all day it's not like we're all you know you walk all day

long maybe into like some work boots or something and when you take your shoes off your feet feel like inflamed like they're definitely hot and fevery the the the pleasure of putting them in like an ice bath or having a young lady who has exceptionally cold hands like rub lotion on them or something like that it's just wonderful and in the same regards like that that gel ice mask when you when i when i throw that thing on when i'm going to bed, it's like, ah, finally. Let it suck all the... Because I'm picturing my eyes are full of blood right now. They're inflamed and puffy because blood is flooded into them because my body thinks they're hurt.

And this is forcing all that blood out. It's a good, satisfying feeling. What's wrong? Why does every woman on Earth have freezing hands? I don't fucking know. What's wrong with them? Because on earth have freezing hands i don't fucking know what's wrong with the devil oh okay all right i like it though i like the freezing cold hands oh no i get cold handed all the time where she'll like be like oh let me put my hand under your shirt because my hands are cold and it's like this ah that sucks why do you think this is a

service i offer yeah if you want i'll be like i'll be like what you can do is put it between the fabrics of my armpit that's that's a warming area under my thigh as long as i'm wearing pajama pants that's a warming area you do not get to sneak your hand in here and put it on my back or put it on my belly the worst thing of all because then you're cold and ashamed that's where my head went yeah like don't don't touch my my shame area what he's testifying he's on the witness stand now show us on the doll where where he touched you and he said point to the stomach The mr. Carlson touched your stomach I'm the personal trainer, Yana! I was trying to... Yes, he did!

It's the worst. Turns out, Mr. Carlson, you're not even a personal trainer. You're just Italian. What are they, belly touch? I thought I could just go around and do... That's who I picture doing that job the most, like the East Coast.

A bunch of guidos. Yeah. Like a bunch of wop. Yeah like a bunch of weights Maybe yeah, the rubbing olive oil on you and stuff Yeah, it sounds about right like the Jersey Shore cast teaching people how to lift weights Exactly. I've never been to Jersey and I won't let your reality of what it is ruin my perception. I've been there Once was enough There's a reason what as shitty as people say

Surely Jersey is not as shitty As you purport it to be Dude Have you been to the Jersey Shore, Kyle? Have you actually spent days at the beach? No, I've just driven through that He's driven through The chemical industrial place

That looks like something from a Batman movie Exit 14 to 16 on the turnpike where like, I don't know what they make. Maybe paper. Something that involves tremendous amount of smoke or steam or something. Yeah. And smells bad. It smells like they make shit. It smells like they make something bad.

I don't know what it is. But it's the Jersey. It's the blueberry capital of the world. There are areas that are much different. Where I grew up, there were lots of cows. And that was the Jersey. It's the blueberry capital of the world. There are areas that are much different. Where I grew up, there were lots of cows. And that was the thing. It is the Garden State, you know. I just didn't know that it was a shit garden.

It smelled so bad when we drove through there. It was like you drive through Georgia and maybe you go past a pig farm. It's like, holy shit. This two miles of roads just absolutely reek. Roll the windows up. But It's like, holy shit. This two miles of roads just absolutely reek. Roll the windows up. Jersey is like,

this place just smells bad. We've been driving for 50 miles and I dare not crack the window. What are you just farting? Not as bad as the weather outside. That is hyperbole. It's not 50 miles. I feel like I could drive in a place in Atlanta and describe Georgia in a negative way.

And it would be very similar. Have you guys ever released really bad farts in the car? And you don't feel like taking the blame. And so you'll preempt it and be like, oh, man, it smells like a swamp or stagnant water around here. And it always gets you out of it. Always. As long as you have a swampy smelling fart. I was in one of those bad parts of Atlanta the other night. So the bad

parts of Atlanta aren't necessarily like industrial waste as much as they are like poverty. And even in the poverty areas, you can find a little charm to it. I was in kind of a rough area the other night. I was picking up some friends who were out at a bar club type situation.

It was like midnight. And I needed to stop and get gasoline, pull into the gas station. And I'm wearing kind of what I'm wearing now. I got my jacket on. I got a button-up shirt, some pants. But I got my flippy floppies on, as I want to do. And it's cold out, though. It's pretty chilly, pumping gas in the car.

And this black homeless guy starts staggering toward me. And he looks out though it's it's pretty chilly pumping gas in the car and this black homeless guy starts staggering toward me and he looks out of it like he looks pretty fucked up and his teeth are all fucked up but he only looks like 28 maybe and he's wearing like a it looked like like like something from like a clint eastwood movie this like poncho type thing he's wearing all his clothes are mismatched and stuff and i can't fucking hear him over the gas pump in my radio. And I'm just like, I can't hear you. And he's like, I can't fucking hear you, dude. What? What? And he like comes closer and closer. And he's like, I don't have any cash. And he's like, I don't want no cash. I just wanted some food. Maybe, coffee it's cold and i was like fuck all right i'll meet you in the store i'll meet you in the store let me finish my gas so

i finish pumping my gas hang everything up lock my car and uh drive away giving him a thumbs down oh look in his eye he was just like that crying Indian on the side of the road like what you said so I go in the store and I already feel like

I feel like I have walked into a fine establishment with my dog and my dog has pissed on the rug that's how I'm being looked at by everyone in the establishment because it's obvious that he's with me yeah and and he goes over and starts making coffee and i and and i could see he's like looking at the honey buns and i was like get whatever you

want just get whatever you want um you know i'll be up here i'll pay for it whenever big spender anything in this whole circle k yeah circle k is your oyster right now make it happen and so he took it to heart he's back there looking around five minutes have passed and like like which doesn't seem like that long but it's a long time when i'm just standing up by the counter with everybody else like holding my red bull and this uh the the indian guy behind the counter is like 25 years old, and he's like, that's going to end up being one expensive Red Bull you've got there. And I'm like, I didn't even want the Red Bull.

I should be down the road by now picking my friends up. And so I look, and I'm just like, hey, man, come on. Let's wrap it up here. Come on. Now he's got four bags of food, like cookies. What a fucking asshole. He's got gummy worms of food like cookies what a fucking asshole he's got gummy worms a honey bun a bag of cookies like like like essentials yeah stuff that you need if you're starving yeah and a cup of noodles and a cup of noodles he's got all this stuff and it's a little plastic cup woody with a foil top that peels off you add hot water and where does he have a microwave somewhere we'll get to that okay we'll

get to that so the he goes back to his coffee it seems like he's been making his coffee forever and it's it's gas station coffee you just fill and put your shit in and stir and you're done but he's got the biggest one like like it's this big it's as big as my cup that i'm holding and and he's just i'm watching him he's his cookies. It's that bag of cookies that the top rolls down, like the nice Milano cookies or whatever the fuck. He's got Milano cookies. He's got gummy rings, like the Sour Patch Kids gummy rings

that are like rings of gummy coated in sugar. He's got some chips or some shit, and he's got the cup of noodles. And now he's over there still making that coffee. And it's just cream, cream, cream, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, stir, stir, stir, cream, cream. And the Indian guy goes- This does sound like good coffee.

The Indian guy goes, how many are you going to put in there? How many? He yells it. And he's like, I only put three. And in my head, I'm like, dude, I've seen you put like eight in there for sure. And so this other black guy who's in line, who's dressed nicely, goes, let him be, man. Let him be. We're fortunate. You know, we're fortunate out here. Don't be messing with him. And the Indian guy is like, I let him be if I want. He always in here stealing.

He steals. He's a shoplifter. I'm watching you. He's like, maybe he is, man. Maybe he is, but let him be. And I go, he's like, you ain't always got to say no. You ain't always got to say no in life. And I go, I said yes, and I just want to get down the road.

We can just wrap this up. I don't want to be part of a race war in here. Let's get this going. And finally, the guy comes up there with all of his shit, and he lays it on the counter. And he goes, can I come back in later and make my cup of noodle? Because they've got like boiling water that'll come out of the coffee machine. He's like, no!

No! You take that shit, you take all of that shit and you get out of my parking lot with it too. Don't you be eating that in my parking lot. You get moving. You fucking kick dirt when you get out of here. And I was just like, I'm just like fucking swipe my card and fucking, it was like $12 for the shit,

like $10 of his shit and $2 of my Red Bull that I didn't even want. And finally, I was so happy to be out of there. Like, just... Did you feel like a good person or like someone you got to take advantage of? Here's the best part. Motherfucker didn't even say thank you. Not even an acknowledgement.

I'm talking, I swiped the card and I held the door for his hobo ass who walks right past me and goes away. I was livid. That is horrible homeless etiquette. My $10 wasn't that big of a deal. I often give $10 or $20. I would have given him a thumbs down. Double thumbs down

to black western hobo man because that was absurd for him not to say thank you. He had this weird western poncho he looked like i can't even describe it he looked like clint eastwood but real poor and black did you have a quarter or a dollar or something in the first place no i had no cash no cash whatsoever a nickel in your car in the in the cigarette tray i had nothing i had no cash and i and i'm not gonna give him my good change.

That's for toll booths. Your good change? I'm not going to give him 50 cents. So instead I'll give him 20 minutes and $10. My time was the valuable thing. I've got a Canadian nickel and one of those fucking Spanish things with a hole in it. Here you go.

I couldn't believe that. This is a partway token if you find yourself in Jersey. Now this is a get out of jail free card but it's from a game. You know what? He probably if he just got arrested at that gas station

trying to steal stuff, he would have got food. Maybe that's his move. Go back in there. Piss off fucking Mishram or whatever the Indian guy's name is and then mishram calls the police he's doing it again i am so tired i i am running out of gummies and then they come out there they take him away and then he gets his boiled eggs like i was so i was so upset with that fucking guy i could not believe he didn't thank me and you know i wasn't fishing for a thank you that's not it's not the point i didn. It's just like I'm thinking how thankful I would have been in his situation.

Oh, thank you so much. You should have set expectations before going in. Like, look, I'm going to buy you 10 bucks worth of stuff, but you better fucking thank me. Have you seen that bow that the Japanese do, sir? Yeah. I'd like a bow. We're talking, you know, three quarters. Three bows.

I want three. Three. Three bows. Three quarters of the way over. Like, you know, three quarters. Three bows. I want three. Three. Three bows. Three quarters of the way over. Like, you don't have to go full 90 degrees. Is it the bow where, like, Muslims praying, or the one with your hands on your side? It's the one with your hands by your side, where you go almost 90 degrees,

but not quite. It's like three quarters of the way down. Is he allowed to look at you, or does he have to look down? Avert his fucking eyes! I should be able to see the top of his head. And you have to say it in a Japanese accent. No, I was livid about that. I'd do it again. I always give hobos fucking money, especially if I'm driving and I get off the interstate and I'm on an intersection

and I'm about to turn left over the bridge or whatever you can imagine the scenario and he's standing right there and uh and i can size a hobo up pretty well and determine if he's worthy of my cash because i keep 10 or 20 above the visor all the time and like i'll always give it to people who i think are actual vets yeah yeah i'll give him a 10 or a 20. Because what am I going to do with three fucking dollars? If I give him $20, he can go and get something done.

That's my hold up. Maybe I'm being too cheap on the $20. I try to be good in life, but I only carry 20s. That's pretty much it. If I find myself in a situation where I have less than 20s,

I just give that shit to Jackie. What the fuck is this? Yeah. myself in a situation where i have less than 20s i just give that shit to jackie yeah like you're whatever purse fucking thing can handle all sorts of different denominations my shit's tight i got my money organized folded up tight my whole wallet's not much bigger than a credit card and uh but then when you know it comes to like homeless and people it's like what i'm gonna like pull out my WADA 20s and get one off for him and hand it his way? It seems both not generous and too generous. Oh, when I lived in the city, I started off much more generous with the homeless

until after a while you realize, first of all, most of these people are fucking tracking me back to my apartment, or they were when I lived there. They'd intentionally get something, and then kind of from a distance follow you or something. Hey, hey, y'all see that walking parade float over there? He just slipped me a 20. Let's go back to his place.

The nicest guy I got food for, I got it for him because he was homeless and had a retarded body. I couldn't. I didn't speak to him long enough to know if the mental part was there too, but his body was very retarded. And he was like, he wasn't a midget or a dwarf or anything. He was just like, you know, Grima Wormtongue from Lord of the Rings,

the way he stands. He had that twisted body. He's got that twisted body. The guy who whispers into King Theoden's ear, Saruman's wishes. He was like that, but. The guy who whispers into King Theoden's ear Saruman's wishes. He was like that, but literally like three foot nine. The teeniest little hunchbacked guy that would go around

and wasn't like accosting people because he didn't have the capacity to. And he stopped me at one point as I walked by and I felt so fucking bad for the guy that I actually got him a sandwich and a sprite or some shit. And he said thank you. He he was nice but there are a ton of those fuckers who do exactly what you said kyle where the second they've got your money the second they do this they're either thinking oh drug time or this guy's this guy's bilked okay i'm done like and i'm sure

being homeless makes you pretty fucking cynical but still i've had the opposite you know like i've never been not thanked that's why i took this so so, but still. I've had the opposite. I've never been not thanked. That's why I took this so hard. And I've told this story four times now to friends and family. I cannot believe this guy didn't thank me. Because 100% of the time previous, when I give a homeless person money, they're very thankful. I can remember what individual homeless people have said to me. Like, oh, thank you so much, sir.

This 55-year-old grizzled guy called me sir. And I'm just like, hey, man, it's hard out here. Have a good day. Take care of yourself. And I feel better. And I'm sure he feels better too because $20 buys a lot of grain alcohol. My favorite guy was the fake ex-Marine

who was just like, hey, man, I'm just looking. I'm just looking for a little bit of money i gotta get back home man i i served in the marine and he like pulled up his shirt real quick to show some kind of tattoo and then pushed it back down like i'm in the marine i was in the marines like doing some i was in the marine mermaid a little thing yeah just showed that that was another common one i. I need money for the bus to get back home. So that's the one I fell for.

Kyle was there for this. We're in Boston. It's Pax East. And we're in front of the hotel. A guy comes up to us and says, look man, my hand is injured or hurt or something like that. And I need $20 to get to, I forget the details of his plan,

maybe urgent care at the hospital or whatever. We need to get his hand cared for. And I think Kyle was there. I know Mr. I was there. That's his co-pay. Yeah. So then he pulls out his hand, and it's ginormous.

Like, he inflated that shit up. His hand has grown like that fucking measuring device they use on the grinch and just bursted because it's 10 times the size of a normal mascot for hamburger helper yeah it's just and i i saw it and was like whoa good lord and i gave him and he didn't he wasn't like asking for all 20 he was trying to like get there incrementally. 20 was his goal for outsourcing. And, uh, and I gave him the whole 20 and he was very appreciative.

But even to this day, I was like, did I fall for like the inflatable hand scam? I wonder if like all the other people of Boston are like, Oh yeah. You know, come to think of it, the hand did say New Jersey Devils number one.

Yeah, yeah. I just. Look at it real quick and put it away. That hurts a lot. It looked like a human hand. I mean, it was right in front of me. I saw it. I just never saw a hand four times the size.

It was so red. It was red, too. It was. But not like a pinkish. Oh, your hand says Brodeur on it. That's fucked. Even if they do rip you off, if they're out there begging,

they're in a bad way. 90% of the time. There are people who panhandle for a living. I remember, and it's effective. In Atlanta, there was this radio show I used to listen to, and it was real big at the time. Since then, they got so popular that it was one of those things where that like each of their members became like wanted by other markets. And they all got pulled away, and it was no more.

And Atlanta kind of lost its best morning show. But these guys were great, and they do hardcore like stunts and shit. It was a little bit like Stern but you know local and they did this thing where they made the guy go panhandle to see how well he could do and they they had him go up against an actual homeless person and i don't remember the details of the of the the competition but if the homeless person out earned the non-homeless person at begging for money then he got like a bunch more money. Well, shit. The guy who just worked at the station wearing like khakis and a polo made like $90

by the time I made it to work. And I'm like, should I pull over and get a pan? Because that motherfucker has made $90 in an hour and a half. And's gotta be consistent like like yeah i bet he's doing this shit every single day and he was like yeah you know i do pretty well i make three four hundred dollars a day you know it's all it's cash money you know i don't pay taxes you know what i mean well where do you keep your money well i i don't want to talk about where i keep it but you know i i hide it you know i put it where it can't be found in my ass in my ass but it was like holy shit you can panhandle and make a couple hundred bucks a day like there are people working actual jobs and especially after taxes they're not making they're not making near

that if you make enough panhandling to like get an apartment or or something like that what happens like do you just like keep paying in money orders and trying to hide from the tax man or like what the fuck would you have cash right would you just put cash in an envelope and pay your rent yeah oh some places don't allow that yeah you could do that but yeah if you find like an individual like if you rent from a guy like i i had a girlfriend and she rented from a dude you know he owned the house and she paid him directly there are places that don't accept cash oh yeah yeah i've lived at places that don't accept cash. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I've lived at places that will not accept cash.

You have to get a money order or check or have a direct deposit thing. Yeah, they don't want to be dealing with bills. They don't want that liability. That's interesting. I think it's literally against the law not to accept cash. I don't know. They did it. Yeah, I believe you.

Airlines won't accept cash anymore. If you're on the plane, you can't order food from those. That's true. If you want a beer or one of those snack packs where they try and they really pump the tires on those snack packs. And they're like, it's got artisan cheese and real meat. And candy. Yeah, and candy. Every single one. Candy, candy, candy just i don't understand these

fatties who are like on the look i can see if we're flying to fucking italy if we're flying to australia or something and we're gonna be on this plane for 16 hours i'm gonna need a snack at some point i i might look my blood my blood sugar get low i'll get all rowdy so we're gonna have to have a snack along the way but when we're flying to fucking the mid the middle midwest or we're flying to the southwest it's like a three to four hour flight and all these people like yeah yeah give me some candies too i mean he's fucking adults i never get it just sit there and read your magazine why do you need food right now i agree with you on a flight to chicago all right now now that i a guy get drunk sitting next to me on a flight to Chicago.

Alright, now I'm okay with that. No, I live in St. Louis and so a flight to Chicago is like 50 minutes. Yeah, never mind. And this guy must have drank five Dewars in that time. Now that I've done, I've flown to Vegas.

I put down two drinks on a flight to Vegas from LA. I get drunk on the plane. I enjoy it. I feel like it passes the time. It's too expensive. You have to show up with a couple of drinks in you. Getting drunk on the plane is like a $100 endeavor.

No way, man. They're like $8 drinks. Okay, I don't order enough. It doesn't take you 12 drinks. No, no. not in the air that's the best part there you go dick's right so so at altitude you get drunk easier so that yeah absolutely do you know what the altitude is in the cabin it's the equivalent of 8 000 feet i don't know why i stopped the whole show for that everyone stop

i know a dumb thing that's like uh that's higher than denver right yeah you get my face yeah you're around five thousand five thousand yeah it's mile high in denver but but yeah yeah um yeah you get drunk faster so if i were the first double shot is getting me pretty tipsy and then if i order another one to 15 minutes later like i'm good and mellowed out and i'm talking to the old lady next to me. We're having a whole conversation, you know? That SkyMall magazine is fascinating now. Do I have a highlighter?

You know, I never got the appeal of garden gnomes before. These Chinese checkers is a must-have. But now that I know, each one has a name and personality behind it. Yeah, I like to drink on the plane. And I always drink liquor. I never want to drink beer. Because I don't want to piss.

I don't want to have to get up and have to piss. So I'm not drinking beer. I'm certainly not drinking their cheap-ass fucking wine. I wish I could do that. I would get sick. I can't do it. But I will get food. If you're going across the country in first class,

and they're like, hey know do you want do you want your meal like oh yeah yeah it's lobster tails with a cheesecake dessert well yeah i want that yeah yeah yeah just to be clear i'm not above eating i'm above paying to eat oh okay paying that bonus like, that, because it's expensive food. It's like, those pretzels were $4? Are you fucking kidding? Like, I don't always fly first class, but if I'm flying first class,

I'll take the free food and I'll take the free booze too because booze is also free when you're flying first class. Is it? Yeah. Huh. You can get pretty fucking drunk.

I just, just, yeah. Maybe that's why my fancy guys. I want a non drinkers ticket. I feel like it'd be a hundred dollars cheaper. Hmm. Might be the markup on that booze is a pretty high though. Booze in general. Save a hundred.

Yeah. Yeah. We'll charge you like $8 for Budweiser. How much is a Budweiser at a bar? Well, I mean, still more than normal at a bar, but I don't even know how much.

If you buy a six-pack of Budweiser at a store, it's like... Well, the store. But in a bar, if it's on tap, which a Bud probably would be. Oh, like maybe a few bucks. Like six? Three?

No, less than that, probably. Probably like four bucks. And you tip two? I always do, yeah. Do you tip every time? Do you guys tip two bucks a drink? I don't even know if it's appropriate. No, no, I tip every time. Usually if it's like a beer, I'll give a dollar as well. I open a tab. I just open a tab

and I tip a percentage based on the night's service, right? Because, like, you can't tell much about service if somebody comes over and cracks a fucking bottle open for you. But if you spend the night and she's polite and fun and she talks to you. I often talk to the bartender about the other mooks in the bar and we make fun of them together or whatever. If she's a good time, I'll definitely tip a lot. You know what code I have not cracked?

The get the bartender to pay attention to you code. He's behind the bar not helping anyone at the moment. I'm intently trying to make eye contact so I can get service and he's ignoring me like cleaning a glass or the bar or something like that. It's like, what am I supposed to do

to get... Tap? Knock? That seems impolite. Bartenders are cocksuckers. It's kind of like scaring a bear away. Big. Okay. Make yourself big. Raise your voice. Nice and deep. Hold

your money out like a flare. Ah! Get away! That's how you get them. Bang pots and pans together and yell shoe bear is how I do it. If you just lean over the bar and make it apparent and just maybe hold your money up.

Holding your money up isn't rude, is it? I see lots of people doing that. What I'm talking about happened to both Kyle and I in Boston 10 years ago. It's hard. If it's busy, it's hard. That's just a fact of life. The millennial bartenders don't know what money looks like.

So you hold the money out and they're like, there's nothing to them. It used to be the way to get them over. You just linger that scent of the money and it would draw them over. What you do now is you open Venmo and just show them the home screen. QR codes.

You gotta flash a QR code at them. Yeah, it can be hard. I don't like going somewhere where the bar is as busy as that bar was in Boston. That was like a crazy busy. If there's like three layers of people at the bar, all vying for his attention, he's, he's given up on life.

He's taken him one at a fucking time. He wasn't even a hustling. He wasn't helping anyone. That was my biggest frustration. Like if he was like hopping and I'm like, well, obviously he's got a lot of us to tend to. So my heart goes out to him. Nope. Nope. He's like the fucking

DMV employee. They're not giving a shit. I don't know. I don't like it. Not my scene. Did you see this story from my neck of the woods? I just linked it. Missouri Senate bans all federal gun control laws and proposed bill. Historic vote would nullify all past, present, and future gun control legislation in the state of Missouri. Yeah, I heard a bit about that on the radio. They're basically saying the Constitution says the right shall not be infringed. It's pretty plain

English, and we're not going to enforce any sort of laws that we feel can infringe a person's right to bear arms. What about concealed carry? Just everybody has one? They got rid of that a couple years ago. Now you can conceal carry here without a license. As long as you don't, if you have a medical, if you have a medical marijuana thing now though, you give up all of your second amendment rights. And so people are like, that was like a stipulation here and so people for the most part i don't know a single person who's done it they're like fuck that i i'm keeping guns so fucking obnoxious how both sides will have their idiotic uh uh nanny state

stuff like the drug people and the gun people can never just cooperate state by state yeah that that the new zealand prime minister basically in a stroke of the pen said no more guns did she even try thoughts and prayers did she give it a go first uh you know so so now what's going on everybody who's obeying the law is going to turn their guns in and everybody who's not is going to keep their guns yeah i don't know the specifics of the law i know they won't be selling anymore. I know one thing. No, you can't have them,

and the government will buy them, and they expect it to cost between $100 million and $200 million on the national level. That's what I read. Ridiculous. It's not my thing. And also, look, it was already against the law to shoot people, so clearly we're dealing with someone who doesn't respect the law.

Yeah. Do you think the average person who owns a semi-automatic rifle is like that fucking lunatic terrorist who shot a bunch of people? No. The last shooting they had was 1990. Yeah, if that was the last one in 1990, that's fucking obscene for them to be, Oh, no more of this type of gun because it's good it's good pr right now or whatever it's a good time to push down who knows if that was on her docket for a while and she saw her chance for sure you know she's somebody's i'm sure even if it wasn't hers yeah it's pretty pretty liberal you know i've been making fun of

her for a long time because i've got friends who are from new ze, Kiwis, as they're known. And, you know, we make fun of their buck tooth pregnant prime minister. Yeah, it's on a lot of issues. I can see both sides, but I don't know. I guess I can on the gun one too, but I still fall on the pro gun side, which is where I am. Yeah. It just, it, it doesn't make any sense to a sweeping ban on that kind of gun because of

one person. And my God, the last shooting was 1990. That is so long. That sounds like literally unbelievable. To play devil's advocate, you can make sense of it though, right? Like if you wanted to commit a mass murder, that kind of gun that they outlawed, you this is all military style what I'll call assault weapons I know gun guys don't like calling anything an assault rifle um no they do they started it didn't didn't they that was their advertising they came up with it to Market cool looking guns in the 80s

by calling them assault weapons I didn't know that I've never heard that and now they pretend like it's like oh that's so stupid to call them assault weapons. Like, you dumb motherfuckers started this to sell guns. I had no idea. But these weapons are better at this task. Their magazines hold 30 rounds instead of like 5 or 10. By the way, the legal limit there, I believe, is 5. Are you telling me that this gentleman is a rule breaker? He's a rule breaker.

Damn it. Let's hope they never run into another one like him I have a I have a hunting rifle It's a.223 but it's a Savage Putting five rounds in takes a while You have to load them One by one from the top It's bolt action

So every time you shoot it you have to re-aim And if you wanted to put your next five in it'd be a real challenge this thing you put 30 in and if you're any good at it in two seconds you can get another 30 in it's just better at warlike tasks so i still think people should have them i'm pro gun guy but i just i i bristle a little bit when i hear like it makes no sense like there's no logic behind it no i i they're just i mean there's more deadly guns you know it's it's what i what would we be thinking of as more deadly oh fucking ar-10 you know it's a heavier it's the same thing as an ar-15 it's just a 308 they didn't ban ar-15s they banned like military style assault rifles so air 10 is deadly to any kind of automatic rifle

yeah yeah yeah yeah i know what i mean shotgun he started off with a shotgun he killed thing about shotguns like i was gonna say they don't have any rounds now there are drum magazines i'm telling hey kyle you might not know there are drum magazines for shotguns um but are they reliable to how would you think of that yeah um if i were insane um that would be my go-to it depends if you're proficient with the thing you know if if the average joe picks one up he's gonna run out of bullets and then he's gonna he's that what's gonna happen i mean the shooter he didn't know what he was doing. He dropped his mag. Do you remember how often he dropped his mag? Yeah, the mag fell out at one point. And then he was, when your adrenaline's going like that,

it's hard to keep count. You know, I've done it in paintball. That's my experience like this is, you know, things get crazy in paintball. And you don't know how many are in your magazine. I use a magazine-fed paintball gun when I play. And I'm often checking. I'm often popping it.

I'll be like, really? I got eight more. Well, fuck, it felt like I had shot 30 times there, but I guess I had. All right, all right, all right. He was just losing track, and then one time it fell out. And also, he wasn't very proficient with it. He had double mags, so you pop the mag out, move it over a quarter inch, and then pop the other one in.

There's two magazines taped together, essentially, but not taped. There's a spacer between them and the whole apparatus, but he wasn't very proficient with his shotgun. Um, you know, he was having jams, um, and, and he wasn't reloading it properly and he really didn't know what he was doing. Now my, I don't have tactical like shooting ground targets with a shotgun experience, but what I do have is a lot of shooting birds with a pump shotgun i would handicap myself and use a pump a lot and i can load that thing incredibly fast um i can put the bullet i can put the shells between my knuckles as i'm shooting and i can flip them like a coin uh on my knuckles and and quickly like throw them in there as i'm badass you know what kyle does that's badass?

Yeah, he does it. He shoots like a skeet and then he pops the shell up in the air and then shoots the shell like it was a skeet. Yeah. That's a little bit of practice. Do you hit it with the butt or does it just pop up hot? Yeah. The shell pops out,

pops it up extra high with the butt and then he shoots that yeah that's cool yeah yeah i i've got i started shooting that shotgun when i was four years old so like i couldn't even mount it you know i was putting it under my arm so i've just got a just like some people really give a slingshot they don't have to aim or really think about it they can just do it that's kind of how i'm with a shotgun i can i can hit anything um but uh but yeah so they banned the heck out of this you still have hunting oriented stuff like the savage i described with the five rounds and um shotguns i think are still okay they didn't ban those but i think the only caliber of semi-automatic they're using or they're allowing anymore is 22 long rifle yeah which whatever

look it you know it's it's it's it's it's it's their deal not ours you know it's that's what they want to do then that's what they should do and if the new zealand citizens don't like that then they should vote in someone who will change that for them that the um jim jeffries tells the story of the australia time like they had a mass shooting and they banned guns and all the australians went huh makes sense just like that and it looks like the kiwis are doing it too so like like you said you know they're sovereign do what they want have you seen this i wish i could share it but um woman shot herself in the head while cuffed with her hands behind her back during a traffic stop in suicide police say so man that sounds plausible a 19 year old woman involved in a traffic stop committed

suicide after shooting herself through the mouth while her hands were cuffed behind her back what was this did she like crawl around or did a cop murder her susan wilson and her boyfriend were arrested during a traffic stop in the chesapeake in july 2018 after the cops found drugs in their lexus they said they handcuffed her and while attempting to apprehend her boyfriend he became combative and ran away from the scene. Cops left Wilson, the girl, handcuffed with their hands behind her back as they ran to catch the boyfriend. While unattended, she was able to grab a weapon

out of the Lexus, contorted her body, and shot herself through the mouth. An internal investigation was launched after her death, which has since been concluded, although police have declined to comment on its outcome. Also, and this is a real shame of it all,

I'm looking to skip ahead, a police spokesman said that the body cam on one of the officers was knocked off during the struggle. Jesus Christ. Yeah, sadly, this body cam, that would have exonerated me. So many problems with their body cams would have exonerated me. Isn't it a shame how

unreliable these body cams are during a suicide with a woman? And always at the worst time. Turn off all the time. I love that video a while back. The cop goes to turn his body camera off. I've always had this

issue with GoPro light cameras, you know, if I don't have a digital display, like on a fucking camcorder where there's a red light that's going record, record, record. I don't know what I've fucking done. He went click,

click. And he thought that turned it off. That turns it off and turns, then turns it right back on again. And so he goes over and starts like planting drugs on a suspect. Wow. Little crack on a suspect. Wow. He's like, little crack on you, my friend. Like David Chappelle. You better the river dunk it in.

He's like, get this big little crack on him. It's right up a Dave Chappelle bit. He's like doing this guy dirty, planting crack cocaine on him. And he's like, ha, fooled him again. And it's just like, what have you done you just you just made sure to record your crack cocaine placement i went dude that's that's like a fucking joke situation that we would make up here that a woman is handcuffed behind her back and she commits suicide by shooting yourself through the mouth like and and no cops are going to get in trouble for this they basically

allegedly murdered this woman and there's nothing's going to get in trouble for this. They basically allegedly murdered this woman, and nothing's going to happen. Oh, we did an internal investigation. Yeah, there's an internal investigation. Would you have some faith? We investigated ourself, and we have found ourselves blameless. I mean, I wouldn't be shocked if there was some paid suspension on the table here. Jesus Christ.

Oh, look at this hardened hardened criminal i wish i could share her picture like he was involved in drugs too so maybe she was what was she one of these uh like uh snowplow kids who was just so ashamed that they were she's 19 years old she looks like a beauty pageant girl like not actually that pretty, but really focusing on the makeup. Yeah, I agree. She looks too young to have all that shit on her face. She looks too young. She's passed away.

Well, let's be... I mean, she's still somewhere. Taylor, never give up. That is true. Yeah, that's pretty fucked up. And the fact that we like see these ones and it happens like these like seems like cut and dry to those of us on the outside like how many

equally or more egregious instances of police doing shit like this are there we're just nobody ever knows nobody has any idea because they can get away with whatever the fuck they want seemingly they just like my car will start screaming like a banshee if i don't wear my seat belt how come they don't have something like that for their body cams like how are they able to constantly turn them off and get surprised by it later yeah my girlfriend went into the cops for for a restraining order follow-up on the one she had to take out a while ago and somebody keep on her job and the cop was an asshole we called up the supervisor there's a whole thing about it the guy gets called in uh they go for the camera like usual camera off so it's her word against his but it's such but it's so fucking frustrating.

It's tragic how rough it is. The thing is, the people buying the cameras and running the cameras are on the side of the police, not the people. So I think actually Taser, the company that makes Tasers, is the leading producer of the police body cams as well. And they're just a pro-police organization. You know, when they sell them, they're like, yeah, we got the easiest body cam to turn off of all the competitors. I don't know about that. The Taser, for example,

when you start using the Taser, it starts recording. That's been a feature of it for a long time. Does the Taser have a recording device? The gun itself. It has a camera in it? Yeah. time. Well, the, what's the, the taser have a gun itself. It has a camera in it. Yeah.

I didn't know that. Which is good. You know, if you're going to tase somebody, cops don't like tasing people though. It's a lot of paperwork. They can kick your ass and not have as much. Strong point.

Yeah. Well, when they want to be able to attack a Muslim, they need to be able to turn it off quick. Like they just do. Oh, here's's a i have a politics one kind of have you guys been following this devin nunez thing oh yeah not at all oh it's fantastic twitter yeah so devin nunez he was the guy that kind of ran cover for trump he was charge of... I saw something about a cow account of his. Yeah, yeah. So the first, the two years that the Republicans had the House, he was the guy that investigated Trump,

and he's the one who went to Trump with breaking news, but it was actually the White House that gave him the news, and he was giving it back to them. It was a big show, and he's kind of a scumbag. Anyway, he is suing Twitter because people said mean things about him. There are two fake Twitter accounts, one pretending to be his mom and one pretending to be Devin Nunes' cow. And they would, I guess, talk shit about Devin Nunes. So he is suing Twitter, the Twitter account that is his mom, the Twitter account that is his cow, and then I guess a Republican strategist, like a real person, for a quarter billion.

250 million in damages. Well, at least now these darned parody accounts will stop. I guarantee all of us take more shit than this on the daily. His cow has 600,000 followers. It had 1,000 followers followers and then he sued it for a quarter billion and now it has 600 000 followers with one of the greatest strizant effects that has ever happened what's going to happen with this they're going to go no you're allowed to make parody accounts about people's cows if if you're a public figure the rules are different so some people are

saying that what this is actually about is changing that uh like if you're not a public figure i guess slander and libel and such are easier to prove but if you are a public figure then all of a sudden like it takes a little more you have to like i'm, I'm not a lawyer, but the other guy has to, like, knowingly be spreading false stuff that actually causes damages. And he won't be able to prove that. There's no way that people like Devin Nunes' cow or mom has, like, literally hurt him. But maybe he can bring attention to it

so that it lowers the bar for public figures to get retaliation against parody accounts just or maybe he's just a crazy dipshit who doesn't understand the internet he's also got the shadow banning part like i the the parody whatever defamation probably think is stupid i don't even know if it it's it's so stupid it's hard to imagine that it was put in there in good faith um instead of just to fuck with those people but the the shadow banning stuff i hope does something like i really uh hate how social media platforms can act like publishers and platforms and take advantage of all the the digital millennium copyright act provisions that are supposed to protect them to provide a

free speech atmosphere or platform but then they they they take all the protections so they don't get sued and then use it to uh politicize the platform like i do i do hope that part of his lawsuit at least gets some traction even though even though the law says specifically that he's wrong um i hope it at least brings attention to it because i'm fucking tired of getting shadow banned so you get shadow banned you think i get banned um yeah i get banned how do you get banned my off social media i've been banned at least at least once on every social media platform, whether it's just randomly, whether it falls under the hate speech clause that is like nothing, like for jokes, I've been banned for. I've watched the Twitter people.

So Joe Rogan had, I forget her name, but she was basically in charge of the department that does that kind of moderation yeah trust and safety okay and she has an impossible job like that that much is undeniable and one of the examples i remember is this they're like you have rules that are left-leaning rules and she's like our none of our rules are supposed to be left-leaning and he brought up one example of our rules are supposed to be left-leaning and he brought up one example he said um you can get banned for telling people that there are only two genders now people on the right say there are only two genders that's kind of where i align but people on the left say there are more and the fact that you know certain hashtags around two genders and such get you banned or shadow banned is an anti-right an anti-conservative rule and she explained her side of it which was this look the uh suicide rate for transgender

people is outrageous it's something like 40 and they like, we try to protect people from bullying. And when this thing, which you make sound like a scientific argument, is actually a thing that people do to begrade. Begrade? Begrade. Belittle, degrade, dehumanize. I like begrade. What is the term for in mass attacking someone? Brigade. Brigade is what I'm going for. That's a new one. What is the term for like in mass attacking someone? Brigade.

Brigade is what I'm going for. Thank you. Brigading brigade. So people are like just, you know, attacking in mass and bullying these people who are what I'll call all messed up in the head about their gender. And it's an anti-bullying stance it's just that this is the kind of bullying that only conservatives are doing it's not meant to be left or right and it's like well what do you do what is the right answer for

that or people who like bullying i don't know if everybody who's ever bullied is necessarily a conservative no no but this kind of bullying there's only two genders is a thing that is done from that's what he was arguing he's like you're but you're banning conservatives and this is an example but this is a conservative belief and they're like ah but we know we're also trying to stop these guys from killing themselves i think twitter's so full of shit like they use i think they use trans people as a legal shield they're a pr shield so they can trot out shit like that and say that they're these big advocates of transgenders but it's really just because they didn't bring it up the the guy brought it up as an example of being anti that was that was their defense right like oh well

we just don't want them to kill them so it's like okay uh you got your you guys are real humanitarians over there while you're taking saudi arabia's money uh while you're taking islamic money for throwing gay people off fucking buildings you're real heroes for the trans people who might be killing themselves for bad words while taking money from an islamic caliphate you're fucking heroes did you see the one where it was like uh where it was like uh it was on that joe rogan show where they were talking about learn to code yeah yeah basically like what what journalists did a couple years ago is when they were like those cold jobs are never coming back you stupid inbred redneck idiot learn to code you're putting your own twist on this tale you're not even trying to be uh no the journalist did not say

stupid redneck learn to code more. Okay, yeah, you know, I'm never hyperbolic. Yeah, but they basically had an insinuation of, your time in the sunlight, your industries are done. Well, not the sunlight. Hashtag learn to code. The coal miners were never in the sunlight. They were still making stuff up.

I'm raking in the big bucks, getting your black lung in the shadows like dwarven men never seeing your families the good times are over buddy the whole point i'm making is that pretty much all of these journalists were super dismissive whatever learn to code like uh hey oh you're 57 and this is all you know how to do learn to code pish posh learn to code and so then all these journalists got purged and fired from these companies because they were not making money. And then,

or like big donors pulled out who fucking knows. And so they all get fired and there's a bunch of journalists. Oh, it's so sad. It's sad. And so a bunch of trolls started tweeting at them, learn to code. And real quickly,

Twitter started just banning people who were tweeting that at journalists or just tweeting it at all it's a so sometimes things that seem like innocuous on the top like learn to code is just the a code word that everyone's using and they felt like they were defending people getting bullied which is the thing they try to do all the time that's the twitter response to it they're like you know this guy got 15 000 messages saying learn to code that day a lot of these were like bot accounts just created for this kind of they said nothing else but learn to code to this guy and we were banning these accounts and that was the twitter reply i mean yeah that's what they say i'm fine with that but i would like all of their legal protections to be removed if that's the case they're no longer

a platform they're a publisher they they should be able to be sued they should be not they should not be protected by the dmca or the so that because the dmca protects them explicitly from moderation decisions so they have an update. Go ahead. I specited and just tweeted. Everything's good. I'll make a video soon with future plans. Don't worry about what you heard on drama alert.

It was just typical bullshit from some idiot. That implies the spoof phone thing is probably. Yeah, maybe so. Yeah. The, wow. Getting FBI does the new swatting getting hoard or getting FBI does the new swatting getting whored or getting fbi'd is the

new what dick was dick was talking about so if i say something terrible to someone on the phone it's not the phone's fault right no one blames the phone and if you say something terrible to something on you know like a message board the same thing holds true like we don't ever hold the phone responsible you can't hold reddit or twitter or whatever but if reddit starts i'm sorry if twitter starts making editorial decisions then are they just the phone line and it's an interesting question more like if they're actively curating content then they're no longer what you said initially which is just like the phones all their decisions are as a company and not as a platform. So they de-platform journalists who are critical of them.

They de-platform Zero Hedge for being critical of them. They de-platform Alex Jones. They always have some bullshit reason that they're protecting kids or trans people or women or whatever other perennial victim they have on their list. But then that's fine. But then let's take their platform

protections away because they no longer need them, clearly, if they're acting as just an entity out for their own publishing ends. So let them survive on their own. If your platform gets too toxic, it dies. That's a

general thing, right? It'll just chase everyone off of it because the trolls are dominant. I it dies like that's a a general thing right it'll just chase everyone off of it because the trolls are i don't think that's true i think that if your platform gets too toxic it becomes non-profitable because uh advertisers leave yeah because because 4chan is huge it's as toxic as it gets and the only reason they crack down on cp and extreme gore and things like that shooting is because of advertisers that's why there is an 8chan 8chan are 4chan people who were like you're not gonna stifle our free speech um so the 8chan is 4chan when people are like i need a little more it's double 4chan it's double 4chan. It's double 4chan. It's twice as bad. It's where the...

So they're really pumping out original memes, I bet. Look, I don't go there. I'm just telling you what it is. Yeah, I don't either. I go to 4chan every once in a blue moon, but I don't think I've been to 8chan. Yeah, 4chan's all cleaned up. They got advertisers on board.

It's all cleaned up. I mean, it's... Is it? It's porn and shitposting, posting you know yeah and and a little bit of i mean shit posting is where most of the fun stuff funny stuff comes from anyway well i'm just saying that you know a lot of people didn't want to be censored or or have every you know they don't want someone i'll tell you the difference on 4chan they were they were like, hey guys, there's going to be a lot of media looking at our page today. Let's put on a good face.

And people sort of did. On 8chan, it's like, hey guys, to all the media who might be coming over here looking, fuck you! Really? Here's our good face. And I saw another post where someone said the same

thing and someone just replied n-word just that was just just one oh i did see that yeah yeah hey put on a good face guys a lot of eyes is gonna be looking i mean media yeah be careful what you say and bomb yeah yeah well that goes back to that whole thing of like they have their self-contained little group and they like being able to find the other and if we were all in a room together you might be able to find the other but you know look and touch and feel and all that stuff but it's the internet so you've got to do it with a litmus test of gore or evil. I love the internet. Let me read off a couple of advertisements here.

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heartburn and don't really know what it is Holy shit It's like when you eat a bunch of pizza All at once and then all that sauce Is in your belly and the next morning you wake Or I'm thinking of acid reflux I am having like Fiery pain Like at the bottom of my throat

Top of my chest That's weird given your diet Everyone just let that go I only ate three pounds of crab legs today top of my chest. It burns. That's weird, given your diet. Everyone just let that go. I only ate three pounds of crab legs today. If I ate three pounds of crab legs or a bunch of pizza, all I would get is fat. Yeah, no, I didn't eat anything crazy today.

I ordered a BLT sandwich from Firehouse Subs, and I got the little one. It's not even six inches. Did you drink a lot of soda today? No, no soda. I haven't been drinking soda at all i've been drinking tea for weeks and weeks unsweetened tea that's what i've that's what does it make you want to throw up at all it feels like uh i should throw up almost it's not nauseous it's not i'm nauseous it's like it feels like there's a lot of evil inside my belly that i should get out but it feels like, like hot acid is inside of me and it needs

to come out. So if you were to like, you could maybe throw up. I could always do that. You know, I was, I'm trying to think back. Is this what Jackie's chili does? But, um, yeah, if it burns, it's, it's a literal burning sweat. No, no, it's not hot. It's not fire. It's like acid. It's, it's, it it's like acid it's it's it's your stomach acid your body's made too much stomach acid that or may have like an ulcer going and it's a sensitive spot that is more sensitive to the acid but i've been drinking alka-seltzer you know dropping the two little bloop bloop into water and that's like an instant fix and i took zantac uh 150 for a while but i think my body got used to that and it's no longer working. I think there's a new pill called Pronegdazole or some shit I'm going to have to switch to.

I get terrible heartburn. Do you get this often? Heartburn? Yeah, all day, every day. That sucks. The way you're describing it, I now don't think I've ever had heartburn. I think I've just had acid reflux. I mean, it's the same thing

essentially. Oh, is it? Acid reflux. I mean, it's the same thing, essentially. Oh, is it? Acid reflux is when the acid is coming up into your lower esophagus area. It burns? Yeah, that's what I get if I eat a bunch of pizza, and then the next morning you wake up and you feel like all that tomato sauce is just burning a hole in your throat.

And heartburn is, in my opinion, maybe it's not medically the same thing, but heartburn to me is when it's more based sort of like right at your solar plex, like right there in that area, and it burns really bad. But I get both. I get both really bad. And if I overeat, it's terrible. So I don't overeat ever anymore because it gets real, real bad.

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oh it burned too it's like when i burp it's like there's less air in my stomach so the acid is like look look yeah it's like the air was keeping my stomach inflated enough that the liquid could could find a place but when i burped in my stomach went like this and the and the acid is like going up a thermometer like just take a big mouthful of air and then swallow. Oh, I might vomit. I would vomit and it would be like the predator's blood. Let me just start all the way over. Whether you need textbook solutions or expert Q&A, there is no better tool to help you ace your class than Chegg Study.

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I wish that I had had this maybe even in high school. It sounds like you can find a little issue and clickety-click, clickety-clack, and somebody's going to help you out with it if you don't have a private tutor or something like that. For $5 off your first month subscription go to chegg.com that's chegg.com slash pka and use code pka that's chegg.com slash pka and use promo code pka for five bucks off your first month's subscription did they not call them chegg spurts did i hear that

right i don't believe they call themselves Cheggsperts. What the hell? What are they? They're leaving gold on the table there. I'm going to go solve this heartburn. Huh. I need Chegg for, like, when, you know, when your girlfriend or wife or whatever sends you a riddle.

Like, here, here, what do you think of this riddle? I don't know about you guys. I hate getting riddles because I just feel. The best case scenario is that you don't look stupid so getting one send it over to like just give me the answer man figure out this fucking riddle so i don't look like an idiot i mean do you how often are you sent riddles? Too often. Your girlfriend sends you riddles? Yeah, she's like the fucking Riddler.

She's got a little suit and everything. Uh-huh, uh-huh. The ultimate villain. Who makes you feel bad about yourself. Yeah. Every year I understand why the Riddler was such a dick more. Oh, yeah. You couldn't even name the prime numbers, Batman.

Fucking retard. Batman, will you kill this guy, please? Yeah. There's this jerk. I'm on a riddle site now. I wish somebody would send me riddles because I like riddles. No, because if you can't answer it, you just act too good for it. Yeah.

And then it's like, no, no, no. It's not that I'm retarded. It's that I'm too busy to figure out what order they took the rabbit, the fox, and the squirrel across the sea in the boat. It's not that I'm too dumb and that i have a graph written out trying to figure it out it's certainly not that yeah yeah i did that once with like it was like einstein's riddle or some bullshit where it was like you need to figure out who has the blue fish and i spent like 20 minutes doing it and like got far enough in that i was like the pieces are falling into place

falling and i get to the very end and it's it just reveals that i've been wrong from step one and i was like i am not going to waste my time on this riddle because i have better things to do you know what i don't waste my time with any more that freaking drives me crazy so facebook which is stupid and i shouldn't be on it but that's where paramotors talk to each other it's like piston plus piston plus piston equals 30 double shock absorber plus double shock absorber plus piston equals this and at the end they throw in like a multiplication sign and And every fucking dumbass, like 97 of them in a row,

don't understand the order of operations that you learned in goddamn third grade. Oh, I saw that one. That one? I've seen like 15 of them. They're just all over the place.

Like, you know, yeah. And then... That's the circle you roll with on Facebook. Oh my God. Fake news and not knowing your order of operations. Yes, yes.

Oh, my God. It's so horrible. See? A lot of our dumb people, dumb, dumb, dumb people who believe fake news and don't know their order of operations. And I have like 1,200 friends on Facebook and they all just like that. It's terrible. Man, your Facebook feed sounds hilarious. I want screenshots of it.

It wouldn't take long. How do we self-select into these Facebook? Like, I don't even go on Facebook anymore, but I'm in L.A., so it's like everyone on my Facebook is just menstruating all day every day about Trump or whatever. We should flop. Let's just me and you. We'd both be happy. I'd be in my little

zone of like... I have a question about this beta. Is it beta or Beto? It's a serious question. Beto. The guy? It's Robert Francisco Roark. It depends if they want to play up his Irishness or his Mexican-ness. Or...

Did he really write that thing about running those kids over? What? Yes. Yeah. And they wax my ass and milk me? Wait, I need all the information about what we're talking about now.

Yeah, I don't know. I read this excerpt about running children over in a car, and everybody said that Beto wrote it let me let me get to the truth on this beta he was just like that like that bernie sanders like uh yes edsm no i don't think it is because whatever uh erotica he wrote um what i mean to say is he didn't write i can't wait to run these cans over no it's a story like beto was uh he was i i guess in some hacker group i don't know if he was a hacker it seems like he's a quote more of a poet

yeah i have it too do you want it go kyle i'm mortified to read it now incredibly embarrassed but i have to take ownership of my words the democratic presidential candidate said during a taping of the political party live podcast in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. Whatever my intention was as a teenager. Okay, there you go. Not so bad. Doesn't matter. I have to look long and hard at my actions, at the language I have used, and I have constantly tried to do better.

Let me see if I can find the quote. I don't give a shit. You don't think I should read it then? No, no, no. It's probably still funny. One day as I was driving home from work, I noticed two children crossing the street. They were happy,

happy to be free from their troubles. This happiness was mine by right. I had earned it in my dreams. As I neared the young ones, I put all my weight on my right foot, keeping the accelerator pedal to the floor until I heard the crashing of the two children on the hood and then the sharp cry of pain from one of the two i was so fascinated for a moment that when i that when after i had stopped my vehicle i just sat there in a day

sweet visions filling my head but what happens next he didn't ge R.R. Martin us, did he? Apparently. And then the feast began! And there was a hollied dormouse! I heard behind me the police arriving with their telltale sirens. Harrow! Harrow!

Oh god, that audiobook. R.I.P. old man who read that audiobook um as as i am not a supporter of beta beta i'm not trying to do any fuckery with his name i'm not a supporter of his or anything but like he wrote that as a kid i don't give a fuck and you and you say things and write things like that sometimes because it's funny and if you take it out of context it can be like um that james gunn thing with guardians of the galaxy. Who got reinstated, by the way? We didn't discuss that, but it was, for your information, Taylor, those Guardians movies.

I think you saw one of them. I saw the first one. I thought it was good. Good, right? First one was great. They're very good. I like the second one. Some people don't.

I felt like there was more character development in the second one, and I dug that. Characters opening up to one another. James Gunn's the reason for that. Many people agree. And all the stars of the show and the supporting cast and everybody who works on that machine that is Guardians seems to love this guy. And then those tweets came

out from a decade prior of him joking about pedophilia and all kinds of crazy stuff. And like not even a funny kind of way. Let me take that back. It's not that he wasn't trying to be funny. They just weren't funny. Like dirty jokes that fell flat, essentially. And they took him off the film yeah and disney was like no he's never coming back and then there was this big campaign behind him to bring him back disney

trying to like squish that down and i'm told that they spent millions trying to squash that whole thing but in the end there was enough crowd support behind the guy and enough of the cast was saying, I want to say that Bautista, the guy that plays the purple scarred up guy who's very solemn and quite funny at times, he was like, well, I'm just not going to come back. You just write me off. I'll go wrestle somewhere.

He's making some normal movies where he's quite good. He's a decent actor. He's got a future. He's the funniest guy in that movie. He's like, well, I just won't do it anymore. How about that? And so I saw the Twitter clip of him opening the door to the studio. And it was like a surprise party that I guess he knew was coming.

But everybody's there, dozens and dozens of people, maybe 100 people. And they're just cheering, going crazy, because he's back. So I'm real happy that he made it back and i don't like it whether they're conservative or uh um liberal or whatever like like if if some little thing like that from their past is picked out now when mitt romney put his fucking dog on the roof of his car that might show a little character right that might show a bit of a how he thought about his dog i wouldn't do that to my dog for people who don't know the story this is he proudly told this story that he had to take his family from like one state to another like hours and hours and uh there wasn't room for the dog so he strapped the dog kennel on top of a station wagon min minivan or something, and then kept the dog in the kennel as they headed down the highway.

And to him, this is an example of just what a problem solver, outside-the-box thinker he was. To everyone else, it was animal abuse on the family pet. See, there's another issue of problem solving I do at Bain Capital, is I'll see a struggling family-established business, I'll swoop in family established business. I'll swoop in in a hostile corporate takeover, sell all of the liquidated, sell all the everything, and then leave with my pile of money. The property is worth more than the business was making in

profit. So I just buy a failing company, sell the property out from underneath it, and then I'm rich. And in capitalism, if you're not a hundred millionaire, you're just a loser lazy person. These people thought by having five pizza restaurants since 1904 that they were contributing to the great American dream. No, no. No, no. That guy sucks.

Mitt Romney? He does. Yeah, Mitt Romney, he just sucks. But anyway, the James Gunn thing. I do agree with you, kyle that the jokes weren't funny but it always is good seeing like the whole pillory someone publicly execute them like and then that guy gets a comeback like i like to see that i hope that's indicative of other people that have gotten booted out on like a wave of of public shit you're waiting for House of Cards 7 waiting for see that's what I'm talking about we're all

waiting for Kevin I think Kevin Spacey might see if it's Kevin Spacey's thing wasn't jokes as much as it was molesting children me getting me to you mean adults getting a key adult of getting too cozy with them at a bar. Yeah. How dare he? He did some creepy shit. He definitely did. Nothing the dick doesn't do. Yeah, what did he do?

It's like... Did he grab a 14-year-old's ass? Let me see. I don't know. I hope James Gunn apologizes eventually for saying that Roseanne deserves to be fired from here abc show after all this shit after he gets let back in because we know that's not roseanne is roseanne's bipolar and she genuinely does seem racist if i'm being honest and and i'm

part of me wants to side with roseanne and just take her explanation at face value. But I heard her go on Stern and try to explain this shit away. And she's like, I didn't even know she was black. I thought I was just making a joke. And it's just like, you sound, she sounded unhinged. She sounds like she's

not all there. And I don't think she has. Well, yeah, that doesn't help, but she was on there on the interview. Yeah. You know, I've taken Ambien before and then woken up in the night and you are an altered version of yourself. But I didn't tweet any racist shit. I didn't like I was stumbling through the house, but I wasn't yelling the N word.

You know what I mean? Like I wasn't calling anybody a monkey or whatever she did. Called her a planet of the she did. She looks identical to the woman in Planet of the Apes. Yeah. Come on, Roseanne. That's not even funny. I'm scanning. It looks like the worst thing that Kevin Spacey did was make

sexual advances against a 14-year-old. Oh, well then who cares? He did it against a 17 year old as well he likes him young yeah this Ambien subreddit

is revealing what this makes people post what subreddit? the Ambien r slash Ambien that's funny like people totally not making sense fuck Japan none of this is racist though Like people totally not making sense. Fuck Japan. None of this is racist though.

Yeah, hopefully like I don't know. I don't think that this public execution of people for things they said 20 years ago is going to stop. But I hope it does. Tucker Carlson stuff. For what? Oh, you haven't kept up on the tucker carlson oh i just heard anytime now i hear someone did something horrible a long time

ago i i don't really care yeah unless it's like a physical thing of like if it comes out that you raped somebody or you assaulted somebody that's different but he went on a radio show which i think might have had a similar effect on people that like this show does you know maybe people who are uh relatively guarded in what they say sometimes come on pka and you see the unguarded version of them he went on bubba the loves love sponges show and then oh he's like a shock jock he's a cuckold he's the he's the guy who uh had uh hogan fuck his wife and the wife is the one who recorded it and then uh sent the video to buzzfeed and then buzzfeed released it and then he sued

them into obliviation no way it's that guy yeah yeah that guy so tucker went on his radio show and uh well he was he just said a bunch of like misogynistic things. Was there anything racist? I'm staunchly against misogyny. In order to protect women from it, I don't think they should be able to evoke or habitate public spaces. It was against the race of women, doesn't that? That's the worst kind of racism.

That's true. Misogynistic. That's probably close to that word Tucker Carlson refuses to apologize let's see what he said he's on Bubba the Love Sponge he talked about he is a weird shaped man his wife is well shaped Love Sponge. He talked about... Ooh.

He is a weird-shaped man. His wife is well-shaped. He diminished the actions of Warren Jeffs, then on the FBI's most wanted fugitives list for his involvement arranging illegal marriages between adults and underage girls, talked about sex with young girls, and Tucker Carlson defended statutory rape. He was talking about a supreme court justice a nominee i think this is i feel sorry for unattractive women i mean they didn't do anything no one deserves that and men are just me

he says if you look he described hillary clinton as anti-penis and says if you look at hillary you know in your heart that she could castrate you, she would. That's a pretty funny line. That's pretty good. That's the highlights I've scanned so far. I thought he said something about Africa, like Africans being subhuman

or cavemen or something, something real racist. Are you thinking of the Trump shit hole country thing? No, I'm not. I guess they share similar beliefs. Let me try to find it myself. I thought he said women are primitive. He did say women are primitive.

I remember that one. It wasn't on the article I read. They are. They can't even drive well. Yeah, this is a different thing i think he said what do you tell a woman with two black eyes nothing you haven't already told her twice already can't get over this guy's collar so cool the fox news host also said that he had no respect for iraqi culture where people don't use toilet paper or forks.

Wait, they don't use forks in Iraq? I had no idea. They use their hands. He said that immigrants and... They use women. If you think about what he's implying there, it's that they eat with the same thing they wipe their ass with. I didn't put the connection there, yeah. I didn't either. I like the forks thing, though.

In comments from 2006 to 2011, Carlson said that immigrants should be hot or really smart, asking if people who come over and pick lettuce are going to build a stronger country 20 years from now. No, that's a true point. We should be way, way stricter based solely on attractiveness. He said everybody knows that Barack Obama would still be in the state senate in Illinois if he were white. Carlson denied the existence of racism in 2008,

an exchange in which Bubba described white women with... Come on. An exchange where Bubba described white women with jungle fever as, quote, mud sharks. I've never heard that term before. Well, that was big in the 90s.

A black person? A mud shark? Come on. Come on. I'm going to Google it. I'm not going to go into the implication here. White men are also responsible for, quote, creating all of civilization. A decade before the election of Trump, let's see, he would blame lunatic Muslims who are behaving like, quote, animals.

And he would say that I'm going to, quote, kill as many of them as I can if you elect me. Oh, wait, wait. No, that's a Donald Trump quote. Oh, no, no, no, it's not. No, no, no, no, it's not. I'm sorry. This website is the Intelligencer. I mean, I believe him. I'm a little confused.

I think Tucker was saying that he wanted those two quotes that I just said to be things that his ideal president would say, which is very confusing. It's him being quoted saying, I wish that my president were the kind of guy who would be quoted as saying... It's very convoluted. Very convoluted. Yeah. It's really weird to read an article.

It just shows you how much work it has to be done to turn a joke into something offensive. You debate politics with a woman and just go just full blown out there, especially feminism. If you're talking to a feminist and she's giving you, well, men need to be more sensitive. No, actually, men don't need to be more sensitive.

You just need to be quiet and do what you're told. Women hate weakness. They're like dogs that way. They can smell it on you and they have contempt for it. They'll bite you. I mean, I love women, but they're extremely primitive. They're basic. They're not that hard to understand. Well, he has it all figured out then, doesn't he?

A little misogynistic, I think one might argue. Most of these sound like they're things you say on a shock jock show. That, I don't. If you put in text, Woody, a lot of the things that any of us have said, clearly joking, and you read it out. And if someone read it out with an aura of, this is to be taken seriously. Like, it would be so easy to take people out of context and things. Oh, I'd be rude. it would be so easy to take people out of context and things.

I'd be rude. People used to tweet me things that I said on the show. And I'm like, what the, Oh, I remember it'd be like waking up blackout drunk, but of course no alcohol was involved. Just the high of PKA insanity.

So I, I could see it. This was said on a shop. Um, who's the, the dangerous faggot? Milo. Milo Yiannopoulos. Yeah, that's what I was looking for.

He owes people millions of dollars now. Did you hear about that? He's not allowed to go to Australia. They banned him because of his comments on the New Zealand thing. Ooh. Yeah, but so he defends... People don't know Milo's deal.

He got into a whole lot of trouble. Sort of got deplatformed even before that, but like pushed out of the media spotlight when he said, he kind of defended pedophilia. And he was saying that in the gay community, things can be different. Sometimes people are like 14, 15 years old. Their parents don't guide them and accept them

like maybe heterosexual children have. So they find themselves an adult lover who helps them figure out how to enter you know the world of being gay right and he and he says it's not all in you know i was the predator and things like that and he was on a podcast his child molest that he was defending the child molestation of himself so there's two parts of it yeah well he was separate he was defending the child molested of himself but he was kind of painting in a positive light that you know he was the predator and that this is a thing that happens commonly which i don't know go ahead those were separate conversations the first part was him

defending the person the priest who molested him as a joke, probably coping with being molested as a kid. The second part was him talking about older men with younger men who are of age. The second part had nothing to do with the first part, with the child molestation. Easy to conflate those, though though because they sound pretty similar yeah it is when you didn't listen to the interview and just put it and and make an article specifically to destroy a guy's career then it's very easy to conflate yeah but he was talking about them in two very different uh very distinct categories uh so anyway when he went on and like I said, you know, he certainly didn't seem against gay pedophilia because he was saying that sometimes this is a useful role where gay boys don't have parents to guide them like heterosexual boys do. Go ahead. Do I have this wrong kids, though? Yeah, he was talking about he was talking about he said consent specifically the age is appropriate and he's in England.

So he said in America it is different as it is here and I think it's fine in every country. But he was talking about younger gay men, not boys or kids at all. So pause there. Yeah, go ahead. Because he came on this show and talked about that same topic and I could use a PKA historian's help here. I'm pretty sure that he was sort of pro pedophilia on it and i didn't take it as i don't remember exactly what he said on the show but i don't remember him being pro pedophilia i think i only listened to the his interview that clip like once but my take

from the beginning i think i even said it back then was like, it's super common for people who were molested as kids to try and retroactively go back and make it. Oh no, I wasn't taking advantage of, I wanted this. Oh, Reverend Maddie, Reverend Mark,

the guy who, uh, or the priest who, who molested me. No, no, no. He definitely didn't take advantage of me.

I wanted that too. I'm, I'm taking some power retroactively for the situation. So I'm in control like that's not like an uncommon thing that's that's what i got from some of his comments yeah i i have a hard time deciphering it and not conflating those two things right there's there's the one where he's like it was the priest i was the predator i sort of took advantage of this priest everything was great and fun and and i'm not a victim no and maybe it makes it help them feel better but it

also seemed like there was some genuine sort of like, Hey, like entering, like discovering yourself as a gay man is a trickier thing than discovering yourself as a heterosexual. You don't have the breadth of role models and societal encouragement. That's definitely true. You know,

so this is a way that sometimes people grow into. That's not always just, you know, two gay consenting 16 year olds find each other. Wouldn't that be nice? So, yeah. And I just feel unqualified to pass judgment on it, really. It's a tougher spot than

heterosexual people have, perhaps. I don't know. I bet it's both. I'm sure there are people who do exactly what you just described, taking the power back. Are we really going to pretend like there's no underage dudes being like, yeah, I wanted that priest guy. I mean, that's happened at least once, right?

It'd be pretty, but everything's happened once. I don't remember how old he was when he said it, but he was very young. It's like 14 I have in my head. I'm not positive. Milo? I mean, you know, I think for someone to say that, like, no, under no circumstances

has that ever happened, those are the same people who are like, nah, there's no life in the universe. You ever see those documentaries where they explain how big the universe is? It boggles my little mind. I know that. When they show... I don't know much about this stuff,

but are you guys aware what the difference between a galaxy and a universe is? Yeah. Not everybody is., you know, they conflate there's a bunch of galaxies in a universe Yeah, there's only one universe that we know of they say, you know, the theories are there someone knows nothing about Marvel stack exactly or that crippled guy with the Ice water disease he was he thought there were lots of different universes. And then there's the galaxy, and we're in the Milky Way galaxy,

but we can see other galaxies from ours. And then there's these gigantic open space between each galaxy, but we can see this unfathomable amount of other galaxies. And within each of those galaxies, it's just billions and billions of stars with other planets.

There's definitely billions and billions of stars with other planets. There's definitely billions and billions. Billions and billions. Since time immemorial. Like, there's definitely life out there. Can you blow your nose, Carl? That was my first documentary. I had the flu, and people now associate this with me. I actually died of congestion

yeah i saw a video and i wish i was smart enough to explain it but it was talking about how bad it is that we haven't seen any other life and basically they're like either we are the most special snowflake who's developing on this trajectory in a way that no one else has or there's some sort of big filter that very few cultures societies races get through that prevents them from visiting other planets and taking over the world the great filter you've heard this before i think that's what it was called can you explain it better than me no uh it's i think you explained it pretty well it's that we should be able to see some evidence even a little bit of an advanced civilization in our with our capabilities if it

exists and that we have seen none implies there's some sort of great filter where civilizations either they can't they physically can't overcome the laws of physics that that prohibit them from traveling the universe in the way that we imagine or they destroy each other or themselves or themselves or or they go in or they they look at, you know, they look at they look at outer space travel like Star Trek style and they say, yeah, fuck it. Let's just go inward. Let's focus on miniaturization. And almost actively work to hide themselves. Yeah, yeah. But it's weird because there are galaxies, like Kyle said, that are much older than ours.

So if you look at our tech projection, it's kind of interesting, right? Like so much of what we have has been done in the last 200 years. And you expand 200 years from now and it's hard to even imagine. And that's not that long in terms of like a society. 200 years from now, we could be flying all over the space and transmitting super far. Like, like we're right there. So why,

what is happening in this great filter that stops people from getting there? And well, the idea that we would be able to see it to me doesn't make much sense because like some of that stuff is thousands of light years away. So we're looking back in time a thousand years two thousand years and i and you're right about the whole like like our tech has gone has really done crazy stuff that's what a lot of those conspiracy theories are like it's alien technology look we just had barely gotten to this printing press thing and then all of a sudden iphone's everywhere and

we're flying in space it doesn't make sense it's been a few decades. Okay, let me finish it. Yeah, I just I've seen a lot about the great filter or whatever and a lot of things could be going on. We've only seen life here and so I think we've got this idea for what life somewhere else would be.

I'm not I think there is intelligent life. I don't know if they're out there like Star Trek fucking flying around with a crew of like aliens and doing science experiments or anything but there's definitely like a forest world out there with like little critters all in it and shit and there's definitely yeah definitely I definitely absolutely I would bet anything there just is there's the odds of it not being or just absurd here and then like there's definitely like like ocean planets out there with all kind of little fishies and amoebas floating around in there this is an idea i was exposed to recently and it has

my brain a whirl so how long do you think humans have kind of been humans like 20 000 years right before any meaningful evolution has happened i think it's like 150 thousand years or so we've been anatomically like modern day humans like obviously shorter and like we were fucked up because you were eating berries all day well silly taylor doesn't realize the earth is only 2 000 years old but um yeah so let's call it 150 000 years like we've had this brain to work with and this body to work with. But most of our progress has been in the last like 200, 250 years. Before that, it was just crawling little baby steps like inventing math. And then the last 200 years, whammo, space travel and telecom and industrial age and

all that crazy stuff. travel and telcom and industrial age and all that crazy stuff. So what if we use our current tech, things like CRISPR, to upgrade the hardware that is the human, right? And now we make it so that the next batch of people are born with super brains, right? And they're already playing with CRISPR in China on humans. What kind of explosion would we get if people were working with, you know, if people evolved from the chimps that we are today to the superhumans, we could be in like four generations, you know, 80 years. Yeah. I think it's as much about us being smart.

It's as much as about us working together as a group as it is about standing on the shoulders of giants, right? Like, you know, the, the, the fact is that when you invent a thing now,

you have so much basis to draw upon. And it's like what we talked about with the cell phone, right? Like, like nobody knows how to fucking build a cell phone. Like, like there's no one guy out there who's like, Oh yeah,

you want another one? Let me cook that right up for you. Like, no, there's a whole group of guys who just do the screen. There's a whole nother group of guys who just figured out how to make that voice control bullshit work took took a whole company to ruin the fucking earphone bud somehow you know like the headphones it's the cooperative nature of us as a species i think that's helped out a lot and that's why religion is a big part

of why we are today it was like once we got together in a big enough group and and some you can have a war a warlord can only control so many people with the threat of like hitting you with a stick right eventually somebody's gonna be like well we there's a bunch of us over here too we could just kick his ass and take all of his women and that that just happened over and over for generations and then all of a sudden somebody was like actually there's a there's this guy in the sky and he would not like it if you did that. He talks to me. And I was like, you know a guy in the sky? Yeah, yeah, I got this book here.

He wrote it. And let me tell you what he has to say about all of it. I hope you're not too attached to that dick skin. As soon as we did that, though you could let you could you could you could guilt these people get them all under one yoke pulling pulling in one stride you know society and and humanity started progressing forward a lot better nuclear weapons are an interesting thing because i i i think of nuclear tech as being fairly advanced right but if i told you that this was like 1940s tech and anyone could have it and that the reason

that more countries haven't worked to get it is just that they don't want to deal with the repercussions of all the tariffs and the sanctions and the dislike you know if you're i don't know who's a brazil and you want the nuclear bomb you could probably get it you could figure it out you could probably google that shit it's from the 40s but brazil doesn't do it because they don't want america and china and russia and england and the whole list to start giving them shit yeah only it's real hard to get like north korea you know is willing to put up with that trouble yeah it's all about those centrifuges that make the material that that siph out the uranium-235 away from whatever the fucking uranium-234 or whatever the hell. The bad uranium.

That piece of machinery is so fucking expensive and ridiculously complicated. We had two big production facilities during World War II. One of them was in Tennessee. And they were incredibly expensive and enormous. And they acquired plutonium and uranium in two different ways one of them was like this gaseous separation and one of them was like centrifugal technology incredibly expensive shit and and the the deal is that most people can't come up with that and and we've told talked about it before but i'd love what we did to the iranian centrifuge that time with that worm they basically just put this

code out on the entire fucking internet and it was a seek and destroy little piece of code that was just looking for an iranian centrifuge that's all like a computer virus that got so widespread and infected so many people and it was like house like Kyle said, it was on every device. But no one looked for it because it didn't do anything. It didn't cause any problems, so no one even noticed it. Dormant. Every device on the planet gets it.

And then eventually... We have devices with that bug on them. Probably, yeah, yeah. And then it finds itself in an Iranian centrifuge, makes itself off balance. Here's how it got there, all right? So the Iranians had their centrifuge makes itself off balance. Here's how it got there. All right. One of the tech.

So the Iranians had their centrifuge facility cut off from the internet. There's no fucking YouTube time at the Iranian nuclear centrifuge facility. All right. This bitch is underground. They're not fans of Woody's gamer tag. They're cooking up uranium down there to make bombs to kill Israelites. That's their job. But one of the technicians goes home and he's on his fucking laptop,

you know, YouTube or whatever, and doing a little work at home. And he takes his thumb drive out and he takes that thumb drive with a bit of work that he'd done at little homework into the facility and plugs it into his facility computer. Now it's in the facility system. It goes into the centrifuge. And I want to say it changed either the speed or it goes into the centrifuge and i want to say it changed either the

speed or the balance of the centrifuge which is something that spins really fast and uh and separates out the good from the bad essentially and it changed the balance or the speed one or the other and a tiny amount not it not not like your car like you were describing how all of a sudden it goes because they'd notice that they they shut everything down. I'm like, Oh, do we break anything? Well, a little, but it didn't fly apart. It changed it just enough so that over a long period of time,

it just ruined this, this multi-billion dollar facility from the inside out. Great. It's like, this is why we need shit posting. Yeah. But I, I,

I, you wouldn't be able to convince me that there's any other 1940s technology that a company i'm sorry i mean to say a country couldn't like put together and reinvent and yeah the next step is that is fusion uh technology right it's it's it's instead of instead of those fission reactors it's fusion reactors and perhaps cold fusion reactors the nuclear is the future everybody's just afraid of it because they've had some bad PR, you know? Well, it's a bad accident. Yeah, I watched an environmentalist talk about how nuclear, I tried to work on it,

so nuclear is the future. And basically, he was just laying out like, look, I was that solar guy. I was that solar guy. I was that wind guy. And while I'm not saying there's no piece of that, you do need all the time energy too. Yeah, it's not nearly as scary. Like more people have died of windmills in the last 30 years than nuclear reactors. If that's true, there have to be more windmills.

There's like no pollution, you pollution, unless shit goes real bad. There's none or a lot. Yeah, it's an all or nothing policy. It's an all or nothing policy. And we've already got so much fuel for them. The Canadians have reactors that run on nuclear weapons. They have reactors that'll run

on warheads. So you can take... We've got about a thousand nuclear warheads.heads so so you can take well we've got about a thousand nuclear warheads the russians have about a thousand they got like 60 more than us or some shit and then the list really drops off no maybe we got maybe we have 10 000 10 023 how many does canada have like two i i don't know if canada has any i i think china only has like 200 and then france might have like 40 or 50 and then it starts really dropping off.

I can picture Canada getting to like the last step and he's like, you know, Dr. Clark, this final screw turn, we're ready to destroy the world potentially. Hold on. Maybe we haven't thought this through. So here's the warhead count. I'm going by total, not deployed.

64-50 us. 64-90 Russia. And then 215 is UK. France is 300. This is out of order. China is 280. India is 140. Pakistan is 150.

North Korea is 20. Israel is 80. That's the whole list. Yeah. And a lot of those we made and then gave to those people. But the Canadians have that nuclear power facility thing

that'll run off of those warheads. We've already got the fuel cooked up. I don't know why Canada's not on this list. I don't know that they have nuclear weapons. I guess I'll leave that statement. I don't know why Canada's not on this list I don't know that they have nuclear weapons I don't know I guess I'll leave that statement at that I don't know

I figured Brazil would have them Brazil's a pretty big country They're working on keeping the people from eating the cats and dogs That might be Venezuela I think that's Venezuela Potato potato I don't know I've never been to Brazil I'm listening to an audiobook gotta catch people up to the

1940s education to get started developing that shit again or else it'll be stuck there forever yeah maybe we need some new technologies they need to figure out that cold fusion thing they need to figure out how to put some shit in a jar and it makes energy apparently is it when you combine two atoms is that what's going on there to turn into something else it releases a small amount of energy yeah and so far squeezing a couple of helium atoms together and some and making a hydrogen atom or something and then a little some electrons jump out and they heat up some water and that water water turns a turbine. Thus far, it takes us more energy to put them together than we get from the joining of them, so we haven't figured out fusion yet.

But like Kyle mentioned, cold fusion, I think that's where a lot of the energy goes. We spend it maybe making the area hot to join them. I'm outside my depth. That's right. Okay, yeah. So yeah, if we could just do that, then we wouldn't have waste, maybe maybe because we just keep joining shit.

I don't know. Yeah. There's a really good, there's a Keanu Reeves movie. It's got Morgan Freeman in it too. And I want to say essentially he invents cold fusion, but that's such a, if you think about what cold fusion might do to the global economy,

there are some powers at b that aren't down and so they they like come in and corrupt his experiment and turn it into basically a fusion bomb and then they blow up a big part of the city that he was working in and they call him a terrorist and now he's on the run from like morgan freeman and his black helicopter posse and uh trying to get his cold fusion technology uh out to the world it's the same thing as that guy uh remember that clip we watched uh i don't even think we watched it on the show but it was a car uh the car the water-powered car guy where it's like on the news and from like the 80s and it's this woman who's like local resident brad richardson finds

out how to build a car that runs on water brad's here with us now to explain and it's just this fucking goober there next to a thing he's like yeah i invented this go-kart it goes entirely on water if you don't have fresh water that's fine use salt water you don't have salt water that's fine use snow you don't have snow that's fine you can just pour a cornmeal in here you can you can pour grease in here pretty much anything you can urinate in this if you felt the need to. You don't have that? You can put ice cubes in it. And then he goes on a list of all the ways to

power it. And like three months later, in the end of the interview, she's like, even the Pentagon has reached out to Brad to learn some more about his invention. And then he was poisoned to death in a restaurant like three months

later. Is that what happened? I don't know. I'm pretty sure. He died of a phobia. He was and shot himself in the mouth. Because he's retarded. He handcuffed himself to a radiator,

beat himself senseless for two days, and then shot himself in the mouth. What a kook! As an ultimate bit of madness, it's heard reporting from his upstairs neighbors, he would scream, help, help, they're trying to kill me. Unfortunately, the officer sent to the scenes,

body cams were dysfunctional they're the luck they go out of the worst times theories that's one of the conspiracy theories that you could easily buy into right it's like and it's been the it's been the source of a lot of movies not necessarily the water car okay like but but just that field of fear a conspiracy theory that someone creates a new fuel source that would upset the global economy, right? All of a sudden, oil futures are worthless, right? Who needs petroleum if water and jello

make energy now? Jello futures are going up in that case. This runs on shit. We have so much of that. Yep. We've been flushing away for years. Time has truly come india from a third world disaster to the world's leading provider of fuel

more at 11 well the car companies did that with public transportation didn't they they bought up all the electric trial like roger rabbit is based on a true story yeah right where the they dismantle the nationwide trolley system just to make everybody more dependent on cars yeah we really should have some of that high-speed rail i don't agree with that um that that socialist lady um that like that's all we should do or we should do so much of it that nobody wants to fly a plane anymore. But we really should have high-speed rail. They were talking about

putting in a high-speed rail like in Atlanta the other day, one that would go from like, I don't know where it was. It was like some suburb south of Atlanta, like Locust Grove or Griffin or somewhere like that. They were going to have this weird tram system

that has pods underneath it that maybe five people fit in and at like 140 miles per hour it was gonna shuttle your ass to atlanta and they were like one of these is the equivalent of a seven lane highway and i was like holy shit do it do it i i would love that i'd love to get little pods right do that shit same thing happened japan's already doing it there was one that was going to go from durham to raleigh in my area and gotten like a lot of funding and for reasons i can't fully understand or explain the university of durham was able to veto it like it was on a voter initiative and it got voted into like being and then durham was i'm sorry duke was like nah that's why i like elon musk man like he's pie in the sky on some things but goddamn if he doesn't have good ideas

like we really do need some sort of fast people moving technology that isn't cars or planes that that goes through the major thoroughfares like like la to to vegas would be a huge one for the economies of both places if you could underground from la to vegas in an hour like i'll please to boston please please take elon musk get him the fuck out of la we don't need any more of us we don't need any more tunnels in la we've got plenty that we don't use. Southwest flies to Vegas. That's good enough for the strippers. It's good enough for everybody. Get Elon Musk the hell out of here. Oh, come on. You wouldn't rather get the tube.

Flying is not efficient. It's not good. There's a lot of energy just spent staying aloft. A train would be a much better idea. Yeah, but like Chiz likes trains. That is a strong counterpoint Trains are stupid Oh my fucking god

So Oh that's right we can't show videos Oh I saw that one already That one has so many boobs in it Kyle It's got a lot of titties Yeah it would not be appropriate for YouTube Hey if you guys are listening to this and you want to see a fun video Go to Public Freakout and look for, it's called...

Rumble in the Jungle. WTF is happening. Yeah, it's about 40 black women fighting each other. Not all ugly. Because usually this genre of video

involves really big women. And these women, you know, not better. Are they in a jungle or what is that? This is an urban environment. I think you get it. This is like that joke from It's Always Sunny when Frank raises the

not-faps. And he's like, I didn't know it'd come out like that. And Dennis is like, I think you did. I think you did. And then there's Frank's flag, and it even has the ornate gold like the Nazis used in the 4Fs. That Frank flag was one of the gut

laugh out loud surprise moments in the show. It just catches you so off guard. There you go! There, it took a minute. Because I was like, I've never heard an urban environment called jungle before. Oh, they're calling black people gorillas. They're calling black people gorillas, I think.

Am I on target here? Oh, this is a racist comment? Yeah, I think it is. I thought it was a Muhammad Ali reference until about 15 seconds ago. No, as soon as Kyle said the title of the video, I was like, this is obviously some racist. Rumble in the Jungle is a boxing thing that's been... That's because they did it in Zaire in a jungle. Yeah.

There's a lot of boxing names, rumble in the jungle if you're a fight fan means one thing yeah and it's not like i don't know some suburb of atlanta or something but uh i guess it means two things now oh well i may as well watch the i. I shouldn't watch the video. We're not going to. No. Well, it's funny to... Yeah, if you've never seen the movie Ali, by the way, it's a wonderful movie. Will Smith plays Muhammad Ali and does an excellent job at it.

And the whole Rumble in the Jungle thing is great. It's really good. Nothing racist about what they were doing, though, because it's in Zaire. It's in Africa. I want to say that was during the time when maybe Ali's boxing license was forfeit because he wouldn't go's in Africa. I want to say that was during the time when maybe Ali's boxing license was forfeit because he wouldn't go fight in Vietnam. Is that why? I'm not positive,

but I want to say that. It was an incredible fight, incredible movie, and a great story. Ali was the best at whipping a crowd over to his side. These two Americans go over there, essentially. These two rich, wealthy Americans go to africa the only thing they have in common is their skin color and these africans don't care that these guys are black or white that's they don't care they're

they're not that's not their deal ali is training in the streets right he's running in the streets like rocky balboa george Foreman is fucking staying in his private little workout place or whatever. He's not going out there. By the time the fight starts, it's home crowd for Ali. They're chanting,

Ali, Boombayee! Ali, Boombayee! That means kill him, Ali. Kill him. At least they got behind him. That's the kind of support you want. He wins the fight. Nobody thought he could win that fight. I've never seen that movie.

Dude, watch the fucking movie. It's good shit. That's the start, and then George Foreman spends the next two hours inventing his grill to get over that wall. I'll show him. He did, though. He's made so much fucking money off those grills.

He's made a ton of money, and he seems to have his head on straight. For a boxer, that's really... Straight enough to sell some grills. I'll say that for him. He never knew his father growing up. He still doesn't know what his father's name was. And so he named all of his kids... No no that's funny you say that because he named all of his kids different iterations of george all the boys are just george but the girls are like georgine

georgia georgia they asked him why'd you name all your kids george and he's like george is the best name which one do you want me to slight i love them all i mean i wanted to know who their daddy was i mean that's really dumb too i've said it before that steph curry's wife they have this like great relationship

and she tweeted out like pictures they're like your kids all look like xerox copies that's what happens when they all have the same daddy Steph Curry's wife, they have this great relationship. And she tweeted out pictures. They're like, your kids all look like Xerox copies. That's what happens when they all have the same daddy. It was a good clap back. That was good. Clap back. Yeah.

Clapping back. Sending sassy gifts to people on Twitter. Hell yeah. Apparently, I had the Milo thing up. And sexual relationships between 13-year-old boys and adult men and women can happen perfectly consensually. And his views, 13-year-olds are sexually and emotionally mature enough to consent to sex with adults.

He spoke favorably of both gay 13-year-old boys having sex with adult men and straight 13-year-old boys having sex with adult men and straight 13-year-old boys having sex with adult women. Was that all his quote? That's his quote? Well, and then he used his own experience as an example, saying he was mature enough and capable enough at a young age. Yeah, that's what I thought he was saying. Maybe I'm misremembering, but I don't know. Everyone just wants to be the guy who outed a pedophile.

I don't know why. You talk about anything that has to do with consent, and if you're on the wrong side, in my opinion, if you're on the wrong side politically, you're a pedophile. I'd be surprised if Milo flat out says 13-year-olds and adults can have a consensual relationship in general. Yeah, I don't know.

But I know that we don't have the capacity to watch videos tonight, so I guess we'll never know. Or I'll never know because I'm not going to look this up. Yeah, I love Windows and how it randomly works different ways on different days. I was watching I talked last week about that,

uh, about how I was watching doomsday preppers and I got super into that show. I finished the show and I was driving around, uh, the other day laughing to myself about if they had a, like a tangential show off that called pedophile preppers, where they would go around to pedophiles who were preparing for the end of the world by stockpiling things like right here i've got i've got over i've got over two

three years worth of jolly ranchers and then i've also got condoms i don't think i'll need those and in the event of this situation happening i put a trampoline in my backyard uh i've got a bouncy house to make sure the kids come over. I've also stockpiled enough batteries to keep the handheld gaming systems going for the foreseeable future. And then they rate them at the end of it where they have to come

through and they're like, our team of pedophile preppers has rated your setup. Now, food, you are okay on suckers. You have zero, zero to offer a child who wants salty snacks though. And the guy's like, you're absolutely right. That is something I'm going to take into consideration

and prepare for. It's like water. Now, you can't just, you can't, your entire plan can't be to drink the fluids of the children. You're going to need your own distillation source. Thank you so much. I was going through all these pedophile... Maybe that's just the funniest thing to me.

Imagining someone who has the foresight to see the end of the world, but only wants to collect things to molest kids. That's Michael Jackson. That's what he had going on at Neverland Ranch. When it all goes to shit, they're going to see a train, and they're going to come running. Throws up the pedophile signal.

He's got that signal, that sound that only kids can hear. Yeah. Come to me for safety. Now, people have given me crap because my bug out vehicle is a functional ice cream truck. But I can't see anything that makes more sense. Who doesn't like a tasty treat in a time of hardship? Yeah.

Pedophiles are horrible human beings, man. We talk about pedophilia a lot on this show. They're the worst people. Everybody hates them. Yeah. We've talked about that very thing. They literally are the worst type of people. What are you more...

If these two things existed in equal numbers, right? Cannibals. An actual person out there, an individual who was out there, and occasionally you'd read on the news, another cannibal attack in Scranton Park. A man eaten in broad daylight. Or pedophiles, which we do hear like that. You know, child taken in broad daylight.

Amber Alert. 13-year-old Mika blah, blah, blah. Found raped and murdered. Clearly cannibals are much worse. Without a doubt. Murderers in general. If you're willing to eat someone, I bet you raped them prior to eating them. People who would, like, if an 8-year-old is raped, that's horrible.

And she'll be mentally scarred forever. But she can still find happiness and live a life and move on when, if she's murdered, it's game over. Murder is even worse than rape. You can always do the murder is worse than rape because you die from murder thing. But I think what Kyle's talking about is the visceral societal reaction to something. Like when that guy ate somebody's face.

It wasn't like... The first reaction of society was like, this is fucking crazy, dude. Not like the biggest piece of shit scumbag to have ever... Whereas with pedophilia, it's very different. Little tidbit about that guy who ate that person's face.

And I think I've said this on the show, but I feel that it should be reiterated every time that comes up for those who remember the ice bath or the bath salts, bad, the bath salt scare of whatever, 2011, when that guy ate that fucking face. And then you heard about somebody else doing the same thing

that guy was stone cold sober yeah yes i can't believe they sullied his name by acting as if he was some sort of drug user he still got blood on his face and he's like i'm not a drug user yeah you guys act like i'm high i'm not. Jesus. It's like you're ruining my good name. That's not really the point that I was trying to make. I'm sure it wasn't. Yeah, it's that there was an actual zombie roaming the streets of Florida at one point. And not under the influence of drugs. There was a man who attacked another man via eating his face.

Well, could he just be under the influence of the Snackleys? You know, a little hunger? Well, you'd be with hunger strikes. I've never heard it called Snackleys. I just made it up. You mean the fucking munchies? Yeah. What is that?

Snackleys. Oh, that's an alien. Like, that guy looks salty the snackly sounds like a made-up last name for a white family that dave chappelle would play we're the snacklies yeah it's like a scooby-doo villain yeah yeah like a reptilian who was trying to pretend to be a human would say about being hungry that a reptilian who was trying to pretend to be a human would say about being hungry. I have the snack, please,

human. That's something that Mark Zuckerberg would say. I don't trust that guy. Look at that guy over there, all sweaty and salty. Me with the snack, please. I see a solution. There's something wrong with that guy. That's hilarious.

Snack, please. There's something wrong with that guy That's hilarious Oh god Chiz you keep linking these videos we're not able to watch videos Buddy Country singer Justin Carter dead at 35 After accidental shooting Oh I hope he wasn't handcuffed behind his back At the time It was actually filming his music video, and apparently...

With live weapons? You know? That's country. Country boy can survive. Oh, man. It's kind of dark. He's leaving behind two young daughters, Dixie and Kaylee. No, don't read that part of stories.

It was a wonderful article. Just read the headline and make up whatever you want to have happened. That's what I do. That's the best way to do it. Holy shit. When a gun in his pocket went off and caught him in the corner of his eye. Where was this gun in his pocket? Was it pointed?

Did it ricochet? No, that wouldn't have happened. I'm with you. I'm trying to think of this. Maybe a jacket pocket or something so that a gun could actually get pointed up here. That's crazy, though. Maybe he's wearing track pants. He's a country boy.

Those pants were tight. I promise you. Yeah, he's not Slavic. He doesn't sing Slavic music. Adidas clothes. He's got some Wranglers on. Man, that sucks. Yeah, he's not Slavic. He doesn't sing Slavic music. Adidas clothes. He's got some Wranglers on. Man, that sucks. Yeah, he's got Wranglers on. Whatever gun position, it remains locked. Igor, in today's news,

Igor was squat in park. Accidentally blow off ear. All of Sergey and Vlad say, you fucking idiot, Igor. Why you squat with gun in pocket? Thank you for watching Russia Today. We will be back tomorrow.

Dude, have you guys followed the Tony Ferguson saga? Oh my God, it's so good. I have it in front of me. All right, so Tony Ferguson fights at 155 pounds in the UFC. Tony Ferguson is part of this trio of fighters that are super-duper badass. He's kind of a crazy, wacky guy who picks fights with heavy weights and seems to have no fear. Invents his own training methods that no one else uses.

He does his own rehab without the help of professionals. I have a quote of his memorized. I'd love to lay out there. This is at a press conference, and he's referring to the UFC, the fight business. He's like, this is a rat race, but I'm no rat. I'm a turtle, a ninja turtle. Michelangelo's my favorite.

How about you? And he just stares at the reporters, and they're just like, So really, though, at 155. So he comes off as crazy, but kind of like a genius crazy. Like this guy's found his own way to do it and his own way to train. And to hear him interviewed, and he's talking about how it's Tony time. And I was under the spell. Yeah, snap jitsu.

I was under the spell that he was, this is a showman aspect of his personality. And a little bit of, and he never stops working out. That's an interesting part of him. You can't get, if he were here right now, he'd have barbells and stress balls

he was squeezing and shit. And a straight jacket. Okay, so I've got a little timeline in front of me. I'll just start reading. I'm glad you got the timeline. This is good stuff. So Christina is his wife. You need to know that.

Christina wrote that Tony did not sleep and believed there would be a great flood as a result of a lunar eclipse. Tony allegedly purchased a life raft and took Christina and their son on a drive inland all the way to Palm Desert, California, about 111 miles from their home in Santa Ana. Christina wrote that Tony woke her and her son up in the middle of the night

and said they had to leave because they were not safe. Tony promised to seek help with mental issues if there was no flood, but later refused. February 12th. This is seven days later. Tony had what Christina described as a psychotic break or a panic attack. He screamed in her face and sweared at her and believed

that she was someone else. She wrote, I woke up late that night with Tony standing over me, accusing me of being a witch. Four days later. Christina wrote that Tony unplugged the refrigerator and turned off half their power in their home. Because he believed that cameras in the refrigerator and ceiling fan and their power in their home because he believed that cameras in

the refrigerator and ceiling fan and that he was being watched. He also cut wires to the heat and air conditioning unit, she wrote, because he believed there was a tracking device in it. Three days later, February 19th, Tony allegedly agreed to be taken for psychological help at Keck Medical Center at USC. Christina and her father went to pick him up. When they arrived, they saw furniture and the walls of the home had been destroyed. The mantle was ripped off the wall because Christina wrote that Chris, this is not well written, that Tony believed there was a hidden doorway under the fireplace.

Santa Ana police were called that day, which is around when she moved into her parents home March 5th so maybe three weeks later Christina wrote that she picked Tony up to take him again to Keck Medical Center again while they were driving there they hit traffic on the 405 freeway in Los Angeles

while the car was moving Tony jumped out onto the freeway ran away, jumped a fence and disappeared he made it back to the family residence later, two days after that. According to Christina Ferguson's declaration in court, Tony Ferguson arrived at the parents' home where she had been residing. Tony allegedly asked their son, want to go for a ride? Christina said she told Tony that it was too late and that he could not take their son. She wrote that her mother stood in front of Tony

to prevent him from leaving but pushed them out of the way back into the house out the back door over a fence with his son

in his arms. Christina wrote that Tony left his cell phone and car behind and ran away on foot with their son who was not wearing shoes or a diaper.

It was also raining out. It's one last piece here. There are many frightening incidents which I have yet to list. However, I have videos and photographs of his frightening, irrational, and paranoid behavior, which depicts Tony crying, laughing, muttering, yelling, etc.

for no rational reason. This guy was a champion just like a year ago. He's a huge star in the UFC. Another thing... Did you say was it sudden? Yeah, is this like... I can't tell. I can't tell. No, it's a history of this.

Okay. Because in interviews and stuff, like I said, Kyle said he had a history of this. I was saying I couldn't tell where showmanship ended because he wasn't this wackadoo on camera. That's that's like that's psychotic it's a psychotic break it's it's absolutely he was throwing holy water on his wife uh you're muted taylor he he literally has gone like the hollywood definition of a crazy person

throwing holy water on your wife that's how you know all bets are off and you need and especially like this isn't like regular joe schmo average american 510 with a beer belly fella this is one of the most lethal human beings on the planet top 100 bar none like there's no and there's by any definition he's one of the 100 deadliest human beings with his bare hands on the fucking planet he could kill each and every one of us in succession with his bare hands. And then go run a marathon. That's not an exaggeration. You go first.

I don't want to go first. No, Dick's going first. He's the boxer. Oh, yeah. No, I'll just stomp him with my riddles. I know all these riddles. Don't stop reading me fucking riddles. You know, he's just crazy enough.

I think Tony Ferguson is crazy enough that that would work. Imagine like, Taylor tries to wrestle him. I try to punch him. Woody tries to use jujitsu on him. And then he gets down to Dick and Dick's like, Riddle me this! Two men are sitting in a dinghy on the sea.

What is greater than God? Bigger, shorter riddle, Dick. Greater than God. More evil than the devil. The poor have it, the rich need it, and if you eat it, you'll die. Oh, nothing. No.

I imagine crazy people are like robots where if you ask them riddles, their heads explode. Well, it gets larger before you cut it. They start to not compute. Brothers and sisters, I have none, but this man's father is my father's son.

Your move. No, no, no, you can't hit me until you... Local man was murdered after confronting a mad professional fighter after trying to read the man the old man in the sea riddle. The riddle merely infuriated Mr. Ferguson causing him

to beat up everyone in the Starbucks. The display answer button. The riddle reader is in critical condition. Go to this page and tell me if the display answer button is broken for all you people, because it's infuriating. You can't solve that riddle.

That's just another riddle. It sure is. Let's see the source. Yep, doesn't work. Yep, doesn't work. This is the worst page in the world. Dude, whoever runs this site, you are our PKA cunt of the week

for making a riddle site and not letting the answers pop. Actually, I changed my mind already. That's pretty funny. I like it. I like it. Yeah, fast forward for Taylor, one of the big UFC fighters, he fights at Conor McGregor's weight, 155. It's very populated.

And he was the champ like a year or so ago. And through a lot of weird circumstances, none of which are really his own fault, he's sort of fallen out of the spotlight to some regard because all these other guys, it's kind of their turn, and he hurt his knee, and all this bullshit has happened to him. And he literally had a psychotic break where he's ripping his walls apart, looking for cameras, thinks there's people in the walls, calling his wife a witch, putting holy water on her, turning his refrigerator off because there's cameras in it. He thinks there's people in the walls calling his wife a witch putting uh holy water on her turning his refrigerator off because there's

cameras and he thinks there's a microchip in his leg which is scary because his leg was recently operated on and you don't want a pro athlete to go digging around in their own leg but he sounds crazy enough to start doing that with some pliers and a blowtorch going to the deep blue on himself that's sad i wonder if he should stop fighting Yeah That's what I was asking CTE What does it stand for? Chronic Traumatic Enigmas

I don't know That's what it is Chronic Traumatic Enigma Damage Can really take an athlete out in his prime Chronic traumatic... Encephalopathy. Yes. I still don't know what it means. It didn't help at all.

I don't know the words on this podcast. I only know that from House. It is encephalopathy. I don't know that word. He should not stop fighting. I think this makes him a scarier opponent. There's this key and peel bit where like... I can't tell them apart from one another and it has another

the fact that they're they're half black it's just i don't know which one's key and which one's fucking peel but key is like they're like it's like a ufc fight promo and he's like yeah i'm gonna take him down and show him what for. Yeah, August 14th. And then it goes to Peele and he's like, when I take his breath from him, I will show him the power of God and he will see the light. And then it goes back to the other guy and he's like,

that was kind of weird. Yeah, but August 14th, Rumble Downtown. I will choke the life from his body and he will cry tears of blood and it goes back to the first guy he's like what what he knows we just pumping up the fight right if y'all got an actual crazy person for me to fight, that ain't fair to me! Or him! And he goes back again and he's gone. And he goes back again and he's like,

where'd he go? Where'd he go? And all of a sudden he stands up behind him and chokes him out right there. And it's like, that's Tony Ferguson now. He's an actual... Tony Ferguson coming into the ring wearing a crown of thorns. You can notice here also, he still has finger paint on his hands and a drywall from a mishap before the fight. He's insisting that he can speak Japanese,

and no one's brave enough to tell him. Tony, the madman Ferguson. So his wife's in on it, you're saying. She's filed a restraining order. Oh, without a doubt! Yeah, she filed a restraining order. Yeah, Taylor. This is just a bit, though.

This is just Mike promotion. The question is, is he predisposed to this? Is it a genetic thing? Is this always the way that his trajectory was going to go? Or is this a result of CTE? Look what happened with Chris Benoit. Well, that's steroids. That's a whole different thing. But he also cracked his head a bunch of timesTE. Look what happened with Chris Benoit. Well, that's steroids. That's a whole different thing.

But he also cracked his head a bunch of times over and over and over. Yeah, but roid rage plus CTE, I guess maybe, you know, was the formula that made him kill his entire family. But I think in this instance, what you've got going on is someone who was prone to this, like a real weird type personality guy. He's always been odd, and things have not been going his way, despite what I'm sure.

He seems like the kind of guy who's like, I'm going to work so hard that none of that other shit matters. I just work hard and harder. And when it gets real bad and I still stumble, well, I just work harder still. And he's done that for like the last three years, and it hasn't worked. And it should have worked from a from a fan standpoint it should

have worked by now he should have gotten habib or connor he should have gotten his belt right back it's it's real shitty that he hasn't yeah i'm a little torn like so what maybe he shouldn't have been stripped of the belt so what happened is he did get the belt he was gonna fight khabib khabib got hurt i think he fought someone else and got the belt out of that fight. Yeah, Kevin Lee. You're right, Kevin Lee. And then he hurt his knee. He was wearing sunglasses inside, and he tripped.

Not wearing sunglasses indoors. Those were prescription eyeglasses. Dana said that. Big lie. Oh. That's a Dana-ism. Are you suggesting Dana lies? bite your tongue i'm i know that dana lies all the time so uh uh anyway well what is definitely true is that he tripped

indoors hurt his knee i'm not an expert on knee injuries but this was a worse one than average not just your typical acl injury instead of tearing in the middle, it tore the tendon from the bone. So he had it surgically repaired, rehabbed it himself, and rather than go straight back into the title fight like you might think he deserved, they put him up against Anthony Pettis, who, you know, it's kind of like a you beat this guy, you'll get a title fight kind of scenario. Top 10 guy, bad motherfucker. That's where we are right now. And I don't know that he's being

denied a title shot really the next title shot isn't really lined up khabib versus ferguson is as good a guess as any but he's too crazy for a title shot right now and that's just where he is yeah well i'm it's it's just that circumstances if it have denied him in many ways you know it's not that dana's like no you can't fight habib it's it like habib's like i'm not gonna fight until october or november and he's focused on he want now ali wants to get him this money fight with uh gsp who's like fade me now or i retire i am now i'm mexican now because this is the only way i can do gsp you know and and then like you've got aya quinta sitting down there who everybody's like how just

how fucking good is this guy you know maybe he deserves another title shot and you got connor out there smashing cell phones everybody wants him to come back and do a thing i quit i think is rumored to fight um cowboy i i i heard i heard that yeah you know and and you got cowboy out there who just had a good fight uh you know it's a it's a it's a 155 is is murderers row they're all bad motherfuckers that they almost need to split it some way and have like 165 and 175 yeah they need to do something there's just two they got a talent concentration right there at that 155 zone. In my head, it's because a lot of elite athlete men weigh 180, right? So 155 is going to be the weight they cut to,

or 170. And those are the two baddest weight classes. You can't take heavyweight and add a super heavyweight because there aren't that many guys who are that big. Even the heavyweight, I think heavyweight champ weighs like 240, 230, and it goes to 265.

We don't have that problem. But at 150, there are so many athletic dudes that cut there. I would love them to expand it. I would like that because I want more fights, and I feel like the best fighters are all in the same, at that same weight class, and I want them to be more active. I want to see more championship fights. There's like eight guys that I feel like I almost never get to see fight, and they're

like the best eight guys, and six of them are at 155. You know one of the issues? They make too much money. I'm torn, right? As a fighter advocate, there's maybe a lot of UFCc talk then you want them to get rich you want good things to happen for them you love the fighters and you want them to hit the jackpot and in every other sport they do so why not on the other hand as soon as you put 10 million dollars in their pockets they start talking about how they need a year to rest and they need to find themselves and

they you know like nick diaz is fucking gone ever since the Conor fight. He's not back. Khabib, he's like, he's got more than he needs. You know, they're not hungry anymore. Also, it's good for the fighters to have more organizations, Bellator, Pride, UFC, et cetera. But I like them to fight each other. I want to know how good MVP is.

I want to know how good Ryan Bader is. Ryan Bader should be fighting Jon Jones. But one's in bellator and one's in ufc and you will never see that it stinks and and like i i'm all about seeing ben askren do more things you know i want to see him get back in there it's gonna be a good year for the ufc i uh i've enjoyed much of the content that there has been jorge masvidal kind of endeared himself to me with his three-piece and a fucking Mountain Dew silliness talk and him going after that guy. They were like, all right, we won two fights tonight. All that bullshit.

That was fun for me as a fan. And, you know, Conor is always in the news doing some crazy shit. You never know if he's over the hill or he's ready for a comeback. It's one or the other, though. And I want to to see him do something i want to see him get in the ring his i saw a post the other day on the subreddit the mma subreddit and they were like what are your favorite walkouts of all time and they started naming some you know ronda used to walk out with that yeah that mean face i don't give a damn about my reputation. At peak Ronda hour, you were like,

uh-oh, she's here. Everyone hated her after they got to know her. That's when she adopted that I don't give a damn what you think about me style song. It was cool. Ronda's about to come and rip a bitch's arm off. Let's watch. She literally breaks arms. That's a probability in these fights and uh they talked about um you know uh habib walking out to like

ridiculous russian pop music that was just corny as fuck they mentioned connor's walk out at some fight and i i couldn't picture it but then they showed an image of it and i forgot that when connor walks out they fill the octagon with fucking smoke yeah and he's doing his silly man walk with like the bendy arms like chin way up like walking through smoke and it's like god damn that is cool my favorite so everyone knows right the radio starts blasting and this and that not a connor walk out fucking shanae o'connor's singing it live yeah she's there she's there that's when he was fighting for him uh he was fighting um the the wrestler guy the the the sort of chunky looking one it wasn't alvarez thinking of dennis siever it wasn't him was it

no oh oh mendez mendez he's fighting mendez and mendez has Aaron um um that country singer singing um um the that that like country boy can survive song I can't think really yeah like that guy's there too it was incredible I'd never seen that they just they got a DJ for this shit it was the difference between a wedding with a DJ and a wedding with a band it's a big step up especially when it's not a cover band that's shenaid o'connor and that's um aaron i can't think of his name it's something aaron um but but i knew him very well he's got a really good song or two i think he makes good country music sort of old school country music but but every other fight he was also like the lead singer of a major like rock band involves an ipod except for connor's that one yeah it was incredible that

was the first time i'd seen any shit like that that was that was cool as fuck um but but yeah i guess it's enough ufc talk i i love it though i i um i think people like hearing us talk about stuff we're passionate about maybe i'm wrong rogan talks about it all the time doesn't he yeah but he that he's that that's his core thing that would now we're kind of just like Rogan. Similar audience sizes, similar income. I'm taller than him. Dude, I took that as two words and I couldn't get past it for a beat. You know we're similar income.

Oh, income. Right, one word. No, you had me right initially. We have very thick loads. Very thick loads from all the elk meat all the yeah it's great for display terrible for drinking it's you know you remember that i haven't done okay you haven't done the uh 23 and me for semen to find your your cum buddies out there i did i actually did. And then I found out that three doors down my neighbor, he doesn't even work there. But do you remember that Joe Rogan shit where they were doing like the election thing a couple of years ago and Bill Burr was on there and Joe, you know, they're all drinking and getting high and whatnot.

And Joe is being his typical ridiculous kind of over the top self when he's like, Bill's like, yeah, Joe, I've been eating it so much of that venison. You got me. It's great. He's like, Oh,

that's awesome, Bill. Yeah. Yeah. Let me ask you, do you feel more aggressive when you're eating venison compared to store bought meat? And he's like,

no, Jesus, Joe, what the fuck is wrong with you? It's meat. You're going to sit there in your little paper boy hat and tell me you're getting more aggressive eating your fucking medicine? You're a madman.

It's like to see somebody to Joe to his face, just be like, no, that is so over the top ridiculous. I get more aggressive when I eat elk. I want to see that. Oh, it's really funny. Don't watch the whole thing, though. Just go to the Joe Rogan election stream and then hit Bill Burr highlights

because most of it is really boring and unfunny, but all the Bill Burr bits of him interacting with it are funny. I found it strange that Bill Burr learned to fly a helicopter, and part of the reason he learned to do so was if the shit ever hits the fan in L.A., he can get out. And I was like, oh, cool, cool. What kind of helicopter did he buy? Oh, he didn't buy a helicopter though.

Wait, what? He's got one foot in. That's like going to the John Wick school of shooting so that you can really take care of yourself. Oh, that's badass, man. Did you get the Glock, the HK, the Sig Sauer? Oh, I don't have a gun. You don't have one.

No, no. When you play video games, you find them all over the place. That and ammo stockpiles and first aid kits. Yeah. It made no sense that he didn't just buy one

and he can afford one. He can afford a helicopter. They're real. Like the maintenance for helicopters is crazy. Yeah. You fly an hour, you have maintenance an hour.

And then you got to like take apart the entire helicopter every uh i don't know how many how many miles but i was when i was i was flying cessna's for a while even even when that's a money sink of a hobby even then the pilots are like oh yeah don't don't even look at helicopters those yeah you got to have a business based around our uh you burning hours into that thing right right? Like Pinochet did. Like who? Pinochet.

Pinochet, the dictator who threw communists out of a helicopter. Oh, thank you. Yeah, I did not get that reference. That one went over my head. No, like those helicopter hawk hunting guys out in Texas. Those guys have it figured out. Those people are paying thousands of dollars for a couple hours of air time

and you know having a good time doing it that's a fucking cool thing you fly Cessnas are you still do you still have a pilot's license no I haven't flown in a long time why'd you get into it my friend of mine was in it

and it sounded like fun I guess I don't know it's just so did you like get your real license and like fly solo and stuff no i flew solo i mean i flew enough to fly solo and then um it came time to do to start doing the cross-country flights and i would just get in and fly and fly around my parents house like screw around in the mountains i didn't really have any interest in getting it getting into instrumentation and chart and uh like orienteering planning your trips and stuff like that it was it was fun just to solo fly i thought about doing it i i mean i do the paramotor thing and there's a lot of crossover people who do one often do the other and uh i went like googling and searching and this one website said like you

know you'll really enjoy flying planes it's fun general aviation but do keep in mind it will be the worst financial mistake you ever make in your life yeah i stopped because uh i what my tax bill came and i was like twenty thousand dollars in debt and said, oh, whoops. I guess I flew all that away. I had to stop for a while. I was like, do you knowingly want to make the worst financial decision of your life? And for what? It's not even a better way to get placed than driving. People don't know. In the Cessna world, they'll be like, if you want to get there in a hurry, you drive.

Because then you're not stuck on weather and all that other pre know pre-flight and put it and i'm like it's just dumb you know that people like to fly somewhere get like lunch in a place that would be a long drive and then fly back and they call it the hundred dollar hamburger but that's quaint it's like three you're really an airport like super local like like to make that work or your work. Or your own strip. The two instances I've seen it work well is that guy in Texas because he's got his own fucking landing strip. By the way, the other day there was a plane crash there. Somebody crashed his fucking... I don't know what kind

of jet he's got. Like a $28 million jet or something like that. The landing gear didn't fucking pop out. He died. No. They did a controlled skid down his runway landing the real issue was insurance handles the plane i wasn't sure if insurance was going to handle the tarmac though they said it really fucked up his runway um and where i used to live um like like there in like carnsville we had an airport right there like a little one you know like like like but plenty big

for for jets to take off of and it was like well shit this that would be cool you know if you just had a little if you had a friend with an airplane yeah and he kept it parked right there like one scenario i'm not i don't think wealthy enough for this but like imagine i had an airport here and then an airport at like my ocean home, you know, and you could just like, what would be an inconvenient four hour drive would be a fun 45 minute

flight. And you're literally going door to door. But, uh, that's that, that would take a lot. An airport on the ocean home. Yeah.

The closest airport for me is either Burbank or LAX. So wait for real. Like, you don don't there's no like little baby airports burbank is extremely close to me there's there's probably some little ones in glendale um but it is or like duarte but just having to navigate around the big ones around here like van eyes van eyes which is also, which is where I learned how to fly. They're a they're a major FedEx hub out there. So you've got gigantic planes going in and out of there all day. It takes a lot of the quaintness out of it when you're when you're trying to navigate around L.A. in a plane that weighs like as much as a motorcycle. in a plane that weighs like as much as a motorcycle yeah i have little airports around me but they look like graveyards for planes which is another like financial doomsday thing you're like a lot

of these planes haven't been flown in 15 years they're just laying around here rotting like this just seems like the sort of thing you avoid i think yeah so yeah i got about there oh good times well i think i'll ever take up flying the hundred dollar hamburger sounds like fun for people who are not uh into drugs so and it seems like a lot of work to have that little thrill that you're talking about there this way easier ways to get it so i got a story amazon has removed books promoting autism cures or vaccine misinformation is this good is this censorship is this um there's a different you know if someone's there's a fine line but we shouldn't start banning books there's a fine line probably shouldn't start banning books

there's not a good historical precedent on book banning if it's snake oil though there is some books are harmful and the real question is who decides what's harmful and not but in this instance they're literally selling autism cures through things like

magical stones and drinking and eating things that are poisonous um so some you don't the stupidest people in society were the ones who were going to get that book read it and then poison their autistic child right so i don't see any reason for those books to to exist yeah we can disagree with them all day every day but like i i don't i don't like that line in the sand of banning books when they start taking war and peace off shelves and burning it um i'll i'll buck up a little maybe but um autism through cures through granola or whatever the fuck like it's like yeah yeah you you wrote a book of lies that can hurt people so you'll defend

free speech as long as it's a literary masterpiece what if i wrote a book you know if it's one of the best books of the last hundred years that's not a high bar how about this what if i what if i write a medical textbook and call myself dr kyle and it's full of surgical techniques that i make up with with diagrams that i print off the internet. I should be able to put that out there. I've already contributed to your GoFundMe and you haven't met your obligations. I mean, I don't know.

Does Dr. Scholl's have a medical license? We need to pull all of these insults off the market. Do you know Dr. Scholl is a marketing gimmick? So I have a little experience in the whole autism thing and they prey on you. So imagine this, right? I'm going to make it about me. You're 28 years old. You just hear that your kid's autistic. You don't know what to do. There's a world of people out there offering cures that are very expensive and parents testifying how it helped them a hundred thousand dollars and like i almost felt like you know am i an irresponsible

parent if i don't roll the dice on this you know am i just gonna let the chips fall where they may and not even try this guy's therapy dr joles you know like yeah and that that's what these books do right it begins in the feet it's all about the feet they they promise cures they promise techniques they're on the leading edge and you know and by the way you're not like an expert you're young you're a parent you're emotional this is your first time in this world and these guys are experts at telling you you think you're too smart to be manipulated and i i guess i was but i could see how someone would fall prey to it yeah yeah i could definitely see it so amazon is being the censor i could make the argument on the other side too

soap was like considered a scam in india it still is you're telling me westerners buy paper and then waste it on their toilets yeah i am so sure i mean i am so very sure of this oh you are so very very sure that all these rich westerners wiping their ass with paper. I love that you made the V and W. You're very, very sure. That's good. What about the counter argument that banning it makes it gives it an aura of credibility to some people who buy even harder into conspiracy theories?

Like, oh, this is what they don't want you to see. It's so effective. Yeah, but what's the downside to that? You know, if crazy people think that you remove, you know, what's the downside? You know, they're going to think crazy thoughts regardless of you taking the Poison Your Child guidebook off the internet. So if they can't be, yeah.

I guess like that you can make a case that you're making them more crazy well maybe we give them the alright let me let you guys in on a little secret you caught me this shit does work I'm going to send you a few copies keep them to yourself though and hey do this stuff

it makes your dick bigger too then they all die Keep them to yourself though, and hey, do this stuff. Make your dick bigger too. Test it on yourself. Then they all die. Sucking dick is the cure for autism. But only my dick. And it's not that, oddly enough, it's the hot mom of the child with the disorder that has to do it. Not you. Get out of here. As a matter of fact, no one else could even be present. Just the hot mom of the child with the disorder that has to do it. Not you.

Get out of here. As a matter of fact, no one else could even be present, just the hot mom. And I specify hot because this is a very particular procedure. It only works with the right aesthetics. Put your phone away. Don't call the police. If this is going to work, you're going to have to diet.

Yeah. That'd be a good cure for autism. Lose 20 pounds. Obviously, that's fake. Yeah. Nobody wants to lose weight. Everybody wants to lose weight. Everybody wants to lose weight. Nobody wants to earn weight loss. Yeah, I don't want to not eat.

Which sucks. Anyway, Dick, anything you want to shout out? Oh, shit. Go to my show, Dick.show. Check out my drinking game if you want to get shit-faced and get kicked out of a bar and make all your friends' wives hate hate you a winner's drink that fun. And I guess, I mean,

I don't know if you have a Patreon, I've made a Patreon alternative new project to.com, but, um, as there's a very small market for that. The other two, the other two checkout. Thanks for having me on guys.

Yeah. Thanks for coming. It was cool to see, uh, to get you in here. The last moment I, you know, I get,

I get my little brief of information, sponsors, and topics and such, and the topics like PKA 432 or whatever, no guests. And I was like, oh, that's a shame. I like having somebody on here. And then all of a sudden you chimed in. You're like, I'm here. I was like, ah, great. Oh, that's good.

I felt kind of bad running in at the last moment. No, perfect. And I said, well, I Chisholm comes next week, and I said, well, I got Dodger opening day next week. That's like my St. Patrick's Day times a million. There's no way I'm going to go next Thursday. But thanks for having me on, guys. Yeah, thanks for coming here.

All right, PKA, 430. Oh, are there any outros? Nope. 431.