Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #441

Episode Date: June 7, 2019

On this week's PKA, Destiny is back and better than ever! The guys look & discuss the latest Rambo trailer and what that film is going to be like, Taylor recaps the world with his terrible anus injury and the hosts then go around the room and pick which action stars from the big screen they could beat up in real life... you know because it's PKA and that's how we roll.

PKA 441 with our guest Destiny. Kyle? A few sponsors tonight, of course. Squarespace, Bluetooth, Tudor, and Original Grain Watches. Brand new sponsor. They sent us some very lovely watches. We'll talk about them later in the show.

We'll show them off. But yeah, we all got one. They're like power rings. Each one's a different color. Each one has a different power. We're very excited. Infinity Watches. Not quite that.

So, Steven, it looks like you're in a new place. I've seen a lot of them. You moved, right? Oh, wow. Yeah, I guess I did. not quite even it looks like you're in a new place a lot of them um you moved right oh wow yeah i guess i did since we talked last time yeah i was in nebraska you're in nebraska yeah yeah i live in la now i just noticed there's been a woman behind you this whole time um yeah she hangs on the background sometimes dude his his camera is so good that it looks like that could be a green screen behind it because it's so perfectly focused at the right distance you know what i mean the bokeh cooking yeah is it is it

auto focus or do you set it for a distance um it's auto focus okay but anyway so you're out in la are you permanently out there like an extended trip no i've got like a 10 month lease out here right now i'm just kind of filling it out then i I don't know. What's the main difference between Los Angeles and Nebraska? There's... What's the difference between Nebraska and probably the surface of the moon? There's probably about as much difference between those two things as here in LA. I mean, Nebraska is pretty quiet. There's not much to do.

What's the big one for you, though? What's the thing that you're like, ah, this is terrible. Now this is a thing. And what's the thing that's, oh, this is great. What is it? So, I mean,

okay, I guess I start off a little harsh. Nebraska's fine, but for what I do, there's nobody in Nebraska that does anything that I do. Nobody there that can help me with my career. Nobody that I can collaborate with or do anything else with.

And in LA, there's a ton of people here. In LA and Austin, Texas are the two big places right now where all of the content nobody that i can like collaborate with or do anything else with and in la there's a ton of people here i'm in la and austin texas are the two big places right now where all of the content creators that i kind of work with or like in that space seem to be living so yeah that would be like the biggest space for me is that i feel like um there's like this place is just more relevant to what i do i guess for work have you been there two months you said 10 months left on the lease is the uh it's a 10 month lease so i think i've got like five months left on it okay so you've been there for a couple of months no share some sort of culture shock i mean is everyone commuting via electric skateboard and i don't know smoking reefer yeah outside it's hard to it's hard to have a culture shock when you spend your whole life in your basement

playing video games but i guess i would say like my bandwidth is better culture shock i didn't know how many fucking things gave you cancer until i came to california because goddamn there's a fucking sticker on everything holy shit i went to go get my fucking car out of a parking garage and there's a sticker it's like if you go in here you'll fucking die like on every single thing like if you use paper plates you'll fucking die like some of this fried food will fucking kill you like on every single building there's a giant fucking sticker telling me that something's gonna give me cancer i guess it's like i don't know if it's an la regulation or a cold california it's a california thing it's just like how canada has those cigarettes where i remember like years ago

when we went to a paintball trip me myself uh or yeah me myself and i me kyle and woody and some other youtubers like eight years ago and mr Mr. I Try Hard had his Canadian cigarettes there, and I shit you not, there was just a picture of a dead fetus on the front of his pack of cigs. And it was like, this is awful. Don't have the money for a regular abortion? Try Marlboro

Ultra Dead. Wait, did you say this was that again? This was in Canada, that he brought his cigarettes with him. I was in New Zealand recently, and I think it's the same throughout all of Europe, where when you go to. Yeah. When you go to the store to buy cigarettes, the packs are these like I feel like I'm on a fucking on live leaks or whatever. The packs have very grotesque images on them. Holy shit.

This is just somebody getting raped. You don't feel like a cigarette now, do you? Actually, I feel like I need another pack. I got shakes. I'm scared. Is there anything that sucks ass in LA compared to Omaha where you kind of miss it or not at all? Do I miss it?

Traffic sucks here, I guess, but everybody says that. But I don't have to travel. If I'm driving, it guess but everybody says that but i don't have to travel like if i'm driving it's because i choose to right i don't have to drive to work um otherwise is that young lady a los angeles residence or did you bring her did you import her from i imported her actually from new zealand she's actually she's swedish we are met kind of in new zealand we've been hanging out for a while and yeah oh very hell yeah dude those those swedes are the master race um some people would say that yeah especially wait is that what i mean you've made your choice hold on i just let it be known the racist you picked her yeah jesus destiny let it be known that he agreed that there's a master race, and it's Sweden. Hey, listen.

My last two exes were Mexican, okay? So, chill. Oh, please, yeah. And I have a black dog. And they're a diverse dating pool. So now I'm not racist. Diverse dating pool. I'm not married to be crucified over this.

As soon as you break up. Build that wall. Build that wall. That would be so fucking funny to see a total flip as soon as you break up. Yeah. Well, that's awesome, dude. Glad it's working out so well in LA. I don't watch any gaming

content. You're all still Twitch, right? Yeah, Twitch and politics and everything. And YouTube. I know you're pretty big on YouTube. Yeah, I'm getting there. Yeah, hopefully. Not as big as... Have you been picking on friend of the show Dick Masterson at all lately? This is like me and Mike Tyson

got into another fight. Dude, next time one of us has to sit out for an episode, I want to invite Steven and Dick and not tell either one of them. Which I kind of just ruined it with Steven here. The type of people that we both are we are

incapable of communicating with another i think it's called um epistemic polarism or something but basically we have like such a fundamentally different way of viewing things that we are totally incommensurable we cannot talk with one another but that's why it's hilarious basically like my goal when i have a conversation with somebody i've got my goal is usually just like ask the right questions to wind them up and then let them go and then i just kind of stand there like laughing condescendingly like while they try to scream at me and then usually that makes me look good so dick if you see this man i love you but you're oh and however many times you debated him oh i thought you guys only spoke once it's at least two oh yeah it was

just i thought it was just once i think he might have popped on another podcast sometimes these guys when i talk to him they'll avoid talking to me he might have popped on another podcast. Sometimes these guys, when I talk to them, they'll avoid talking to me. But if I'm on another podcast with four or five other people shouting at me, they'll hop in real quick. I think he might have done that on one recently. I don't remember. It's hard to keep track of those guys. If I ever watch a streamer-style YouTube podcast, I'll get one video through

and then the suggested video will have nine different people in Discord. It's like, this is too stressful. I don't know who these fucking people are. Everybody's yelling, I'm like that whole like podcast area of live streaming podcast like it's fucking mayhem like no there's no structure whatsoever and that's coming from a show that has no structure yeah well something i don't know if you guys want to know how much you pay attention but like podcasts so oh fuck let's see if i get this right podcast started off as kind of like a pretty super serious thing.

And then it grew a little bit where like YouTubers then started to like big YouTubers like Woody. And I think like the Game Grumps guys were like big YouTubers started to have like more serious podcasts. And then something happened like maybe two years ago, I think, where it was like everybody needed to have a podcast. And now there's like every single person that can throw video up on the screen and talk for more than an hour is having a podcast now and even on twitch like every single streamer has at least one podcast running at any point in time in like their weekly like schedules see those people are all sellouts see we were doing this 11 years ago for fun because we enjoy that's not true not 11 years do we fun. That's not true. Not 11 years ago. Do we need to take a second?

14, 15 years ago. Do we need to take a second to stop for an ad read? Not quite yet. That's funny though. That's my point. About two years ago, a business model came about where this whole thing became profitable and you could earn money doing it. Everybody's like, well, I need to do that then.

We're here for the love of the game. Eight and a half years ago. I just did 441 divided by 52. Yeah. God damn. Time flies. Not really. This has been dragging on. It feels like every year of life gets faster and it's scary. It felt like 14

years to me. Watching bad podcasts has taught me moving in the direction of interrupting less. That's one of the things, believe it or not, one of the things I can't stand in a podcast is when people interrupt too much and it's just like it hits me with this self-realization

and I pull back. I am on a scale of 1 to 10, I've gone from a 10 to like a 7. Hell yeah. All the way down to 7 yeah this is the only podcast i listen to like regularly now is spitting chiclets which is a hockey podcast and other than that like i'll listen to like three episodes of something get bored throw it away and then yeah you get it kyle yeah it took me a second to process it but i like it yeah yeah they're doing good and it's like

it's so funny now because the blues are playing Boston in the Stanley Cup, and the host of this podcast is so fucking Bostonian. He's just like, yeah, fucking dude, I'm trying not to be biased about it, but fuck, man, that hit against fucking Bergeron last night, fucking awful, dude. These Blues are getting away with a lot of shit. It's like, goddammit. Of course, there's no one in St. Louis doing that. But uh, anyway, nobody gives a fuck about hockey

I do know but I'll I do but I don't want to destiny. I know you're a huge hockey fan, right? Yeah I love the NHL the Red Sox What was your the sport you played growing up that you enjoyed? Cross country. Does that count? That counts. It's a competition. Yeah, I guess the only sport that I barely,

and I wouldn't even say I know anything about it, the only thing I know a little bit about is college football because I lived in Nebraska, and you hear about the Huskers wherever you go, although they're a lot different than they were in the late 90s. I don't really know too much about them. I just know that Mizzou hated the Huskers and the Huskers hated Mizzou. And that was about it.

I don't even watch football. A friend of mine played for Nebraska football. I won a couple titles. They were real fucking good back in the day. Yeah, the Osborne era. So you did cross. What do you do in cross country like the long distance i think the longest race i ever ran was like a 5k so i wasn't amazing and i stopped my sophomore year so huh that was one sport that i did it in eighth grade because my parents wanted

me to do it because i was getting fat and i hated every second of it it was running is the worst thing ever that's what they should make you do in prison is relay races and shuttle runs uh i remember once i don't think they make you do that in prison and i think it was i said they should make you do it oh it's terrible it's i remember in eighth grade i was doing uh track and it was just one of those things like the coach didn't give a fuck and so we're at this meet And he's like Taylor. We need somebody to do the hundred meter hurdles So you get in there and do the hundred meter hurdles, and I was like? Okay

So I got there and like I'm I'm a big guy like tall But I was I'm stocky. I played hockey my whole life, not this shit. And I look over, and everybody's lean, mean, fighting machines. I remember running off, and I see everybody pulling ahead of me a bit. We get to that first hurdle, and I jump, and I make it. And I was like, only nine to go. I get to the second one. I hit it with my foot.

It falls down after i'm most of the way over the third one i basically jump into a waist tie and then i ran to the side of the track and just jogged to the end dodging the rest of them it was fucking humiliating no you made a good decision this is this is a clear sign of someone who's making an ass of myself no and making an ass of yourself would have been just like i've seen guys just trudge through them to their dragon two or three at the end like a drunk driver plowed through a couple of fences or something and they've still got the neighbor's garden hose wrapped around them like you were like this is

only uh this is a downhill not gonna make not gonna make it let's just let's just get that's any of you guys have really humiliating sports moments where you remember how embarrassing it was? Anything good? I remember another time I was playing goalie in ice hockey, and a guy chipped it in for an icing, but it went towards the goal. And it was one of those bouncing pucks. And so I was lazy about it and just put my stick and glove to get it it bounced right over and they scored on me and it was a really important game and i

remember just just wanting to to poop my pants so i could leave it was for some for some reason i played basketball when i was like seven and i scored on the wrong goal and uh but but but but that's so tempting isn't it like it like usually how that goes down is the other team will miss one. The other team will miss one. Then it comes to you and you're like, I can do it. And in seven year old basketball, like I had no concept of that. It was just, it was just such a free for all that on that court that, that I was just like, I, I got the ball.

Made it. And then you jog back to your side of the court. Or their side of the court. I had no idea. I used to strike out in t-ball. I just thought of that. That was awful. That's like a meme.

It's a real thing. That's the one where the ball is on the thing, right? On the tee. Yeah, if people don't know, a tee is there's a stand and the ball stands still on it. And all you have to do is hit it with the bat a couple of feet. If you hit this thing like eight feet, then the pitcher has to run. He has to throw it to the first baseman. Good chance first baseman can't catch it because we're all like six years old. But yeah, I couldn't do it.

I really didn't have the support system around me to teach me how to play baseball. So I would stand facing the pitcher. You know how you stand sideways and they kind of throw it at your shoulders? You would stand like feet towards them like you're having a conversation. Feet towards the pitcher. You know how Mac and It's Always Sunny is always talking to his dad about having that catch? Yeah. Did you ever have a catch with your dad did you did you ever just go out in the yard and toss it back and forth uh sometimes like uh uh he worked a lot he worked a lot more than most dads

did so he didn't have time for that mostly after a couple of strikeouts my mother did say like you've got to take this guy and show him how to hit a baseball a couple strikeouts and t-ball oh yeah no it was a real like i would most of the time not get on base or anything and then like or i'd hit the t were you like the easy out i'm sure i'd hit the t and the ball would roll forward just a couple of feet. I didn't really have a good vibe for whether I should run to first or not. So sometimes I should and I didn't. And other times I did and everyone's laughing because the ball didn't go anywhere. I didn't like tee ball very much.

It doesn't sound like it. I don't know if I would take my kid to practice or if I would take him to the doctor if he was striking out. I don't know if I would take my kid to practice or if I would take him to the doctor if he was striking out. If there's some motor skills, some apraxia going on or something. There is a lot of issues. Yeah, I was like a bottom one percenter in t-ball. And then I learned to swim with all the other kids that can't throw or catch. What happened with you,yle is or with you scoring

on the wrong net that happened two years ago to a guy in the nhl his rookie year he was so nervous and known as like a goal scorer and he hadn't scored in a while like the puck came out back in front of his own net and it went to right right to him and instead of like getting it out of his zone he just went oh and scored on his own net like top shelf top great shot and then like it showed a picture of this 19 year old's face on the bench afterward just like just horrified like the captains had to come over and be like it's okay man things happen even though they should be like this has never happened ever but i'm sorry you finish fuck you know oh how long this? Do you know if his career

kept going? Oh yeah, his name is Patrick Laine. He's a very good player, but he scored on his own team, not even off his shin guard, just full on wrist shot. Would have blocked or missed or something. See, that's what I say about my basketball shot. A bad player would have shot at his own goal.

All right. You did shoot at your own goal. Well, a bad player wouldn't have shot in it. He's getting it. Yeah, yeah. I sunk the basket. Yeah, I made the shot. There's some skill displayed in that incompetency. Mm-hmm. I was so fucking bad at soccer

as a kid. It couldn't maintain my attention. And my dad was like, I'm the oldest, and so he wanted me to be into sports all the time. And so he had me in soccer and baseball when i was like four five six all that shit and i would just play with bugs out there i i didn't pay attention at all i ran like just just like the arms flailing kind of run the the way like little boys do and i remember like my dad being so exasperated just being like he's he's got to be good at something and then and then hockey came around and it was like oh thank god thank god this can

hold his attention yeah i would say like baseball and uh football baseball and soccer i mean i don't know maybe just me these are incredibly boring sports so boring you want to make me watch like even like american football i can watch maybe it's because i grew up with it basketball i don't like it but i could watch it um hockey i don't really like it but i could watch it but oh my god soccer and baseball like for hours and hours you sit there 12 hour games and there's one goal like every other oh man oh god it's so boring i don't know i can't i can't do it like people start cheering like crazy in these games and i have no idea yeah i don't get it at all. I live in St.

Louis and everybody's a fucking Cardinals fanatic. And so it'll be like game 12 of the season and they'll be packed. And it's like, what do you, who cares? Who fucking cares? Oh man. Coming from football too.

Like that. And that's another thing I never got. Like in football, every game, or at least in college football, I may, I may imagine it's the same in the NFL, but in college football,

every game is vitally important. I mean, you lose two games in a season you might you yeah you might be done like it's so important every single game is like paramount and in baseball you're on like the seventh game of like a of a 27 game series like do i even care about the outcome like what the fuck is even going on what is happening here like yeah like there's less convoluted like scheduling in esports like i'm so lost i don't i don't understand i'm sure there's a rationale behind it but jesus they play like they'll play like 200 some games a season plus or whatever for like baseball yeah they play 162 games a season that's insane that's insane like i was talking to someone yesterday when

they're like ah cards are sucking now even though they were first place a few weeks ago. But it's only 50 games in. The season's young. And I was like, Jesus Christ, who fucking cares? Like, who cares about baseball? I feel like at the end of the season, though, you've really determined who the better teams are, right? Like in college football, it's like you often don't know. They'll get into the bowl games of college football, and guys you often don't know you know they'll get into the the bowl games of

college football and like guys get blown the fuck out because oh yeah he was undefeated in the green river division what what is that was he playing high school teams yeah then they'll play some big sec team or something or some big 10 team get blown the fuck out because they only play 16 games a year or whatever and baseball it's like yeah we played 162 fucking games this year it's pretty clear that everyone got a chance to play everyone yeah what's like what's the what's a good percentage of winning by the end of the season in baseball like 65 no it's higher than that yeah well that shows what i know nothing yeah i don't know either i haven't watched in a long time there's a there's a formula that they always use they're like you're gonna win this many games

you're gonna lose this many games the winning or losing the being the great team is decided within like these 30 games or something like that i can't think of the numbers that are always used though there's a really interesting there's an interesting kind of debate that goes on for video games when people talk about like balancing a video game and it has to do with what maintains competitive integrity while also maintaining viewer or spectator excitement and the funny thing is that these two things are diametrically opposed to one another the type of scheduling or the type of game that consistently delivers you the best player as the final finalist over and over and over again is actually way more boring to watch than something that introduces like elements of luck

um that make things so much more exciting to watch yeah so like on on one end you know we like imagine you make a game where the best player always wins every single time like that's cool for the competitive integrity and for the hardcore fans that want like only the best of the best of the best win that's cool but in games where there's like a little bit of a little bit of luck or a little bit of rng going on a little bit of random stuff going on um you get those really big upsets or those really big underdog stories that make things so much more exciting you need that in sports yeah and even even in like college football like that'll happen every now and then we're like a team that shouldn't lose even in the big 10, a team that should never lose to Iowa State or something, loses.

And you're like, oh, whoa, that's massively exciting just because of the potential for all of the upsets in the season. And it makes all the fans more excited too. But for the competitive integrity, probably not as much. So it's that balance you have to walk. It's officiating a lot in real sports, I find. A lot of times, you hear about it every time there's a bad call. Like last year

wasn't the state of louisiana suing um over over the saints is that true yeah fucking funny yeah they were trying to they were like there was a congressional like upkick about it like about because the saints didn't make the super bowl and apparently they deserved to go like there was a bad call and they got fucked who did did they, who were they playing? I do. This is last year's like playoffs. I, it was like the Ravens or something.

That'd be hilarious. If like Thomas is like giving the reading, wearing a Ravens hat or something like that. First thing that comes up is lawsuit against NFL for blown call in saints. Game has no chance for Louisa. Of course not. That's so good. I like to imagine the refs on the witness stand, but still in

their uniforms. Blowing his whistle and shit. Everybody's wearing their uniforms. Imagine trying to find an impartial... You know, they blow the whistle. An impartial judge in there. Yeah, judge or jury? Yeah, holy shit. All these people are from Cleveland, so they're just upset.

That would be a heated jury debate. Oh man, some people might die in there. Holy shit. That would be so funny if the jury was out way longer than on murder trials because this guy brought his jersey and his hat. No, no, no. Go Bucks, go. Or whatever the fuck it was what uh you talked

about esports i've never watched that before what are what are the big esports that you're into watching or the game i actually hate watching all these sports i just like playing games i used to like to watch cod i was into that i could name i don't know a dozen players or more maybe probably two dozen players. But to me, it's funny you're talking about the RNG element versus the guys in the top. One of my issues with COD is they'd strip out a lot of the things in the game that made it so it became different than the game that I played.

And that, it just sucked. I don't know. Like, bring in those areas. I would like to see how a competitive player, like how the world's best chose their killstreaks. How did the team choose their killstreaks? Would I try to set someone

up so that he could get to a helicopter? Or would we all just run around? It would be interesting to see that stuff. I didn't even know killstreaks were allowed in the professional. That's the point. No, they were. They limited which killstreaks you could use in Black Ops 1

I think or 2. I forget. They definitely allowed killstreaks. It was interesting because you got to learn how pros used killstreaks. There was one, maybe it was the RV, the remote control car, and it started with a little thing that you held. This is from foggy memory. Anyway, it was like a UAV.

You could ping once and then not use the car. At the beginning of every round of S&D, he would have his one ping where he would get to see where everybody was. It was interesting to see how pros did it. I never thought of that. That's pretty smart.

I'm not into esports at all and Stephen clearly isn't. What games are you playing now? like what's your big go-to stream in games? I still play League sometimes but there's kind of like a weird drought like right now the big games are like the Battle Arena

one so Fortnite is obviously still on top I really like the Call of Duty Blackout that was a lot of fun I played that for a while I played Apex Legends for a while I didn't like that one as much as Blackout but it was still pretty good so I I played that for a while. I played Apex Legends for a while. I didn't like that one as much as Blackout, but it was still pretty good. So I played that one for a while, but then it was kind of dropping off. And now it seems like the two big ones are PUBG and Fortnite. And I'm not a big fan of either of those. I played PUBG for a while, but yeah, so I mainly just play League now and then like random single player games. Oh,

and I'm playing the World of Warcraft Classic beta. It's been interesting. We played a little bit of PUBG the other night. We've been playing a couple nights a week. I play Rust a lot. That takes up a lot of my time. But we go back and forth to PUBG. And oh my god, I'm so rusty going back to PUBG. In Rust, it's like your movement is very crisp. You can really jiggle peek.

It's like you're controlling your guy on a dime. Like he's a machine. He's just jiggle out, jiggle out, jiggle out. And ADSing is just instantaneous. And you can really pop a corner, shoot a guy and be back in even though there's no lean in pub g there's lean but it's like your guy has like inertia and he's all wavy and it takes him a second to get started to move and then a second to stop and he's just he's just fluid almost and it's really hard to get back into the swing of that i used to have

it down but like now it's just like getting behind a tree and like peeking out and stuff. Yeah. After playing Blackout too much, it's I can't go back to PUBG. I feel like a boomer, like shouting at the PC, like fucking move.

What the fuck are you doing? It's like you're having a dream. Like, you know how in a dream, sometimes you're trying to run and you're like fighting against your own fucking body. Oh, that's the worst. Yeah. And I'll do that like in PUBG,

where I'll be like in a room and I'm trying to shoot out this fucking window my gun keeps hitting the fucking windowsill and i have to like lean my character like the exact like geometric position in order to fucking get my head oh god it's really frustrating yeah pub g is a lot more frustrating to control than rust is like very crisp trout makes it look easy i don't know what's wrong with you guys i'm sure if i played i'd play like that Yeah You just gotta practice We played the other night and the first hour I do dog shit And the second hour I'm like alright I'm getting this

And by the third hour it's like alright I got it back I can move around at least it doesn't feel bad But Shroud is just good at every game Segway into the COD trailer? Oh yeah that came out I don't know if we can watch it What's the new Call of Duty called? Modern Warfare Is there a Modern Warfare anything? I didn't know if we can watch it, but yeah, we can talk about it. What's the new Call of Duty called? Just so I can watch the trailer. Modern Warfare.

Is there a Modern Warfare anything? I didn't notice. Nope, I think it's just Modern Warfare. Yeah, and Captain Price is back. Kyle talked about it in the show, the cigar-smoking guy. There are rumors, like they said one line, like Captain Price and the old gang or something. Because I'm watching the whole thing.

Where's Ghost? Where's Ghost? I'm all about Ghost. I want Ghost. I don't know why, but I'm attached to Ghost. they said something like Price and the gang. They ask Price, who's your team? He goes, some old comrades. Jesus Christ.

Sorry, my bad. I had the wrong input. Can you say the words again? Some old comrades? They ask Price, who's on his team, and he's like, some old comrades. Yeah, so people like me are latching onto that, thinking Ghost is coming back.

Maybe, yeah. I don't give a fuck about that. I like Captain Price. Captain Price is the cool one. It's his fucking scar. Yeah, absolutely. Captain Price was the coolest one. Not to me. He's been in so many COD games, going back to maybe the very first scar. Yeah, absolutely. Kevin Price was the coolest one Well, I guess not to me been in so many cod games like going back to like maybe maybe the very first one that's true, but I Don't know. I attached a ghost for some reason. I'm just glad it's not futuristic it looks like we're fighting sand people again, which I love and

Yeah, absolutely what they are and that's where they live and It looks like maybe it's a bit of a reboot rehash or something that it's kind of hard to tell where they're going with the story i'm also excited that there is a fucking story there was no campaign last year there was there was there was a multiplayer battle royale and um zombies are we on black ops yeah yeah zombies yeah yeah and zombies so there was no campaign and i like the campaign i like i like i like all of the things i played a ton of zombies i played a ton of battle royale played a little multiplayer but i had definitely traded multiplayer for a campaign that i could have chilled out and

played for five to eight hours or whatever i don't have nearly as much fun on campaigns as i do multiplayer i've only ever liked the Modern Warfare campaigns. Wow. I like most of them. I really liked the World at War campaign because they stole a lot of material from Enemy at the Gates. That's a great fucking movie. It sure is, about Stalingrad. The whole scene in the well

with the sniping that's lifted, the crows and everything. I liked that campaign a lot i like to go into the pacific you know and roasting those japs and those uh those little tunnels and stuff with the flamin warfare oh that was a lot of fun never forget december 7th and uh and that was one of my favorite campaigns obviously modern warfare 2 had a great campaign i liked that campaign matt where you got to go through the airport and shoot everyone yeah that was right as uh like fps russia was being born and uh he got to talk about that a lot you know how the game was banned in his country the

the dead comedian patrice o'neill on the old opie and anthony episodes when that game came out he was playing through the campaign he's like no man i don't do that multiplayer shit i'm just playing the campaign and there's one map where you come out and they say no russian and they just walk through the airport shooting people and i'm going by like trying to make sure people are okay not even shooting my gun it's just it's so funny it would have been okay on black for them to not include the uh campaign i can't believe they still charge full price for the game a lot of people were upset with that i think It would have been okay on Blackout for them to not include the campaign, but I can't believe they still charge full price for the game. A lot of people were upset about that, and I think they should have been. Yeah, their rationale is, but we gave you

Battle Royale instead. You don't think you get more game for your money? Like, I played Borderlands not too long ago. That is just a little game with a bunch of running and fetch quests. But that's like if you bought monopoly like the board game and there's no dice but there is a deck of playing cards and they're like hey

there's a whole other game in there but the main part of the game i was purchasing is gone how do we decide how many steps we'll draw a card i got four diamonds what What does that mean? I feel like you get a lot more for $60 than you do in most games when you buy COD. It's one of the best game per dollar I can think of. It is an enormous scam, people. You're not paying for the full game anymore. Believe you this. I did not pay $60 for the game.

I paid like $13 135 or something like that and then if i wanted i don't know how much extra content there has been since then because whenever i don't remember i think we either switched to rust or we switched to apex for a while and then to rust and sort of like transitioned out of cod although we were playing a ton of cod i i really enjoyed it but since then i think there's been a lot of uh a lot of content added that was nickel and diming you. On Modern Warfare, that's one of the rumors. No microtransactions, no season pass. Well, that'd be interesting.

I'm down for no season pass. That'd be an interesting experiment for them to do. Because they've clearly made so much money in microtransactions that that's become the norm. And if they're really steering away from that, if people really, really hate it that much, you'd expect to see them gross quite a bit just based on that. I'm guessing that Call of Duty hasn't done as well with microtransactions as some of the other games.

Of course, CSGO has done amazing. Team Fortress has. A lot of the games were like Fortnite and such from the beginning where people got used to that. But in COD, they didn't like my... It's a full-price game, so you're not supposed to have them. And I think COD 16 is dropping. So you can't drop

microtransactions into COD 15. Your player base is trained. Yeah, well, the season pass thing is definitely a real dick in the ass. You double the price in the game. And you double the price in the game, and you get herpes. And it's it you know you're you double the price of the game and you double the price in the game and you get herpes and uh it's no good dude speaking of asses my ass is so sore

i apologize taylor i mean i thought i was gentle how much dlc did you buy what happened to you no it's not that no no no it's i uh i told him i'm pkm but i'll tell it again to make a short story shorter i was at a buddy's bachelor party in the ozarks and we rented this big house and and we uh the large group of people were able to show up the day before we had to show up the day after and so all of the fucking bottom bunks were taken in their big room so i had to go on the top bunk i'm a a very, very active sleeper. I roll around a ton. And I took the top bunk and I was like, all right, this little bar will keep me secure in here. This little wooden plank. And I rolled around in my sleep and apparently knocked that bar off and then rolled out of the bed and didn't wake up

until I hit the ground, like six feet lower. Hardwood floor. And I got lumps on my head. I got bruises all over. Like every day, new bruises are showing up. My ribs hurt. My right ass cheek took the brunt of the damage. And it is... The bruise is spreading since Tuesday. You know in the beginning of Lord of the Rings

where they show how Mordor's control is spreading across Middle Earth and it's like black and darkness? That's like my ass cheek right now. It is just black. Black, purple. It is horrible. And I have gotten borderline

no sleep in the last five nights because there is no comfortable way to sit or lay down rather. I can't get comfortable. I'm rolling all over the place because I always roll all way to sit or lay down rather. I can't get comfortable. I'm rolling all over the place because I always roll all over the place. Wait, are you in a back sleeper? It fucking sucks. I sleep on my side or my back. It's hard for me to sleep on my stomach because my septum or whatever the fuck,

it didn't come in right, I guess, when I was in the womb. And so I've had a number of nose surgeries. And if I lay on my stomach, I have trouble breathing. And so, yeah, I sleep on my back or my side side but I can't sleep on my left side because my ribs are bruised I can't sleep on my right side because my right ass cheek is just obliterated just just fucking ruined sitting here for four hours is gonna suck like this it's almost unbelievable I look like such a douche walking around like with a limp and said someone asked me today like oh what happened and I I just said that I hurt my hip because I didn't want to be like,

yeah, my ass cheeks fucking ruined it. Like, just destroy it. Why am I all green? It is far and away the worst group I've ever had in my entire life. And I don't know why you're green, Kyle. Why am I green? Swap cameras? Maybe.

There's no other camera. This is the new camera. This is the third new camera. But there should be other cameras then. I those cameras away i saw you for a sec what is happening how can this what is happening i don't know it happened hey i should probably leave the call. You think that? No, it's camera related. Because it's happening...

Yeah, but I'm going to have to unplug the camera and shake it and then plug it back in and you can't do that on the fly. That's your troubleshooting to shake the camera? Well, I think we've gotten to the base of the problem here. I mean, that's what I did when I babysat all those years and had no issue

they always say not to shake a baby yeah they've never dealt with a troubled child you know just cry cry cry when they say don't shake a baby how hard of a shake are they talking about they're talking about real hard like toss a baby up in the air and catch them and they're all good like what are people doing or they're just like what do you think can you fuck like just shaking i'm willing to bet that in the moments when you would probably be most likely to shake a baby those are going to be the least likely moments you are to think about how much you should shake the baby so you probably should never shake no no a counterpoint you should probably get into a rhythm of shaking so that you have like a muscle memory oh so like you practice like a maraca yeah like like Yeah, like if you're going to do

some out of control shaking, then you should do some controlled shaking so that you're good at it. Okay. It'll also improve the baby's neck strength, I assume. I don't know what it'll actually do. But yeah, you hear about those stories where it's like, oh, this person like rolled over in their bed and suffocated their baby or this

person shook their baby so hard. It's like like i always imagine them just like up at three in the morning like not even fully with it just being like shut the fuck up like shaking like that but who knows funny that you conflated those two because one to me is like a super loving parent that like maybe was at their wit's end and just decided to snuggle the kid to sleep. And then while they were sleeping, rolled on the baby and suffocated it or something went wrong. The other is a super terrible parent that just shook their baby to death and murdered it.

You're right. Those things weren't at all the same. And also to clarify, when you say snuggle your baby to sleep, you mean like hold them, not like I'm squeezing you so fucking hard that your lungs can't expand enough. You're taking the air necessary to scream, right? So we watch a baby now, and sometimes the best way to get her to sleep is to have her

fall asleep on your chest. Yeah. It's warm, and it just puts her out. Yeah, the breathing and everything soothes them. In some awful world, what can happen is you fall asleep too and then the kid rolls over into such a way that it's not good the baby we watch is too old for that you have uh one kid two kids steven uh just one just one did he move out to california too no he's still in nebraska i usually travel a fair bit so like i just actually came back from there maybe a week ago but yeah

every time i travel i stop through nebraska we hang out for a bit and then we also play games online and whatnot too so oh yeah he's kind of at that age were you yeah yeah that was when i would have moved here a lot earlier i should have been in la like sooner or in some other part of the country besides nebraska but i didn't want to leave until he could like until he could have conversations where i'm not there and understand what's going on you know like you can talk to a three-year-old but i don't know what a three-year-old is thinking when they're talking to you on skype but he's eight years old so i figure like he has like a good idea i could talk to him about what's going on which game do you play together um call of duty zombies sometimes and then he likes to

play a game called dying light but it's fucking horrible to play together we can't figure it out ever so it's usually the call of duty one or sometimes starcraft i will say as a public service announcement though i didn't know this until I became a parent. Don't sleep with your kids. A lot of people don't know that. A lot of people, I guess because they grew up, their parents slept with them, or it's like sometimes you're like,

oh, sleep with your baby. It helps a lot. You're not supposed to sleep with your kids in the same bed because there are a lot of people that are heavy sleepers that will unfortunately just roll over and then you kill your kid because the kid. I would destroy a baby if I slept next to it. I would roll over it all the way like multiple times.

It's just funny that Taylor more or less brags. Oh, I would wreck a baby so hard. Oh, I'd roll right over it, man. Smush it. It stands no chance. Most babies when they die, the insides are still on the inside. Not mine.

I would pop it. God, my ass is actively hurting it's not a passive i want to see it so it's like it is it is dark purple and i can see the green starting to spread the tendrils of green reaching outward on my that means you're healing yeah hopefully well it's itchy as fuck painful and itchy that itchy. Itchy is when your wound is healing, is something that I heard once. Oh, must be true. Can we talk about the Everest thing?

Yeah, I don't know much about it. I'd love to hear. Are you shitting me? Okay, listen. I'm going to be actually really serious for a quick question because I didn't get in the email. You guys need to get warnings, people, coming on your show if they're prone to epilepsy or some shit.

Kyle might set them off. Like, damn, dude, I don't know if I'm going to have epilepsy. Kyle left a call. God, Chiz, what the fuck? You didn't even put an epilepsy warning in our email. Yeah. Jesus. I blame Chiz.

God, my ass. Sorry, go ahead with that i see why i got invited at the last moment of this is a scuffed version of the pk podcast it's a little got ass pains we got a guy with having an epileptic camera going on over here like okay did you see what's going on with everest all right. In a nutshell, Nepal makes money, more money than you might guess, by issuing permits to climb Mount Everest. It's something like 11 grand, but there's like a handful of different permits that they pay towards Nepal. And they just keep getting more and more people. They give a permit to everyone. They don't say, you're not fit enough. We have too many people already.

That's not a thing. What they're actually saying is, yeah, there were 11 deaths, but next year, we're going to do more. You're like, it's the biggest mountain in the world. It's the Mount Everest of mountains. That's true. Yeah. They do call it that. Man, that's so funny.

There's a huge line of people waiting to get to the top. Dude, did you scroll down to that video and play it? Oh, I haven't played it. I'm playing it now for the people. I can't fit the whole thing on the screen. And there's no volume control. I hate... Is this Instagram?

Yeah. Instagram video player sucks. Oh, my God. Web videos that don't have volume knobs yeah or pause or stop or start like how is this good and why is instagram the most popular app around makes me feel old i get angry when things make me scream at my computer like i have no control over it oh my god this line though this is outrageous oh and by the way climbing mount everest doesn't seem that hard based on this video like when i know when i think of people in line when i think of climbing mount everest

i think of a guy like clinging on to the side of a mountain as icy wind like rips at his skin and it's awful invisibility is low and he's like he's doing that thing where they're inverted like they're actually like climbing like like back away from the oh right right there none of that happens it's all but it's mostly hiking and then there's a lot of like with a rope attached to you going up a real steep like hill that's what the real issue is hypoxia it's running out of oxygen so i knew that it was mostly hiking which is a you know fancy word for walking like i knew you'd walk to the top of this thing and then if there's anything dangerous actually good mountaineers will lay safety ropes and ladders and things like that that help you as kyle mentions it's mostly hypoxia but i thought the weather was worse

now i know that you you crest the very top Is it crest? You summit on the best days. So I'm sure that's what we're looking at. But it doesn't look that cold. You know what would be cool? It would be the first guy to come at the top. Okay, so to be clear, the difficulty in climbing Everest, it's not the weather or that there's like a lot of hiking. The problem is that once you get past a certain elevation,

it is tremendously difficult to do anything such that when you're past, I think it's called the death zone literally or something. When you're past a certain elevation, if you stop to sit down, not only are you probably never going to have the energy to get up again, anybody that tries to help you stand up will also probably become exhausted and then never have the energy to step up again or to stand up again. Like there are stories of very, very well-trained people that will have stopped to try to help somebody. And as that happens, they kind of get tired by exerting even a little bit. Everything is a monumental task. They end up sitting down and then both people end up dying. Even people with a lot of experience. I think I could train for two years and climb Mount Everest. I don't, I don't, I absolutely do. And I would just pay

to have like two extra Sherpas. I want absolutely do. And I would just pay to have two extra Sherpas. I want full oxygen. I see some of these guys being sparing with the oxygen. I need like eight of these. Whatever a lot is. I was trying to think of a racial slur. I want one oxygen tank and then one nitrous oxide tank. If I want to be freaky up at the top.

Now that we have a moment to chill out in the tent. Turn on the nitrous, boys. Let's just fill the tent. But I was trying to think of a good racial slur for those Nepalese Sherpas. Snow people. Yeah, I was heading in that direction, but it wasn't going to be people.

I would have like eight of those guys with me, and they'd just be loaded down with oxygen and snacks and stuff you know like definitely snacks one of them is like you're telling me you just want me to bring mountain dew and dorito yeah that's it that's your job he's just got he's just piled high with it i could totally climb mount everest in two years just just just hike a lot just hike a lot five tubes of sour cream and onion pringles i'm at an age where i wonder like what would because i feel like if i trained for two years you know what i'd be 48 i'm not sure how much this is even helping me 527 everest you'll notice there's only two hosts

yeah you see that shit on the top of it might be everest it might be kilimanjaro where like what steven was saying like someone gets so exhausted and they sit down and when you're that high like you it's hard to remove the remains and so there's just like the skeleton or not even skeleton the frozen body because it doesn't even decompose people with their shoes on a bunch of columbia gear yeah and they'll be like they call this guy yellow shoes and it's like oh i hope i'm never remembered for my footwear they're gonna be like they call this guy hollister shirt we told him it was inappropriate. This sucks.

So apparently if you're going through hypothermia and you're in an area like that, before you die, because all your nerve endings die, feel super hot, ironically. And so people will strip all of their clothes off and get naked and then start burrowing as some sort of instinct or you know insane i'm out of my mind because i'm so cold reaction like that'd be a very dark porno there's shrinkage it's shrinkage it's minus 50

my nuts are crossed over with ice yeah Yeah, I think you could do it because if the issue is exhaustion, then that's just because of the lack of oxygen, right? The other thing the lack of oxygen gives us that Steve didn't call out was the decision making. Like when you get that hypoxia from low oxygen, you may start making bad decisions and you can't tell that you're making bad decisions.

You don't understand that you're dumb because you can't self-evaluate. There's a super good video by the Smarter Everyday Guy. Are you guys familiar with him? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. bad decisions. You don't understand that you're dumb because you can't self-evaluate. Yeah. There's a super good video by the Smarter Everyday Guy. Are you guys familiar with him? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He does a video on hypoxia. He goes in a hypoxia chamber. And man, I want to say it's like two minutes. I think he's in there. It's a really short amount of time. And he's doing like really basic motor skill tasks. And what he's told, yeah, what he's told is in order to get back on oxygen, I don't even know if he has

to push a button he has to like put a mask on and i think push a button but it's very very very simple um and it gets to the point where like after like a couple minutes um the guy on the thing is saying like uh hey dustin you need to put on oxygen or you're going to die and he's like and he sits there and he starts laughing and he's like i don't want to die and he's just like sitting there like that's it yeah and it was just like a few't want to die and he's just like sitting there like that's it yeah and it was just like a few minutes like holy shit and the other guy you know puts the oxygen back on him and then very quickly he you know i've seen another one that i want to show us how fragile we are this would really be a good porno the girls are very suggestible

that's funny there's another one where the guy is same sort of hypoxic chamber like the smarter everyday one and he's just reading off playing cards you know four clubs he shows it five of clubs and for a brief moment he just gets the suit wrong right so maybe it's diamonds but he identifies it as hearts you know and then he just starts fouling it up completely you know it'll be a four of spades and he's like 10 of clubs and and you're like that's not even close you know he's a face that he doesn't realize are face cards. And he gets stuck on one. And he keeps saying it's the same card again and again. Doesn't realize that that's unlikely.

Yeah, yeah. Doesn't realize that's unlikely. And everyone else realizes how crazy. And they ask him, like, double check that card. He does and sticks with his incorrect answer. Draw four? And it's eye-opening to see. Like, just you can't figure

out that you're making bad decisions he has no idea he can't read a card yeah yeah that makes a lot of sense but but like again if i just bring an extra five sherpas and and with so much oxygen that i'm literally sleeping with oxygen on like i think that the two hard parts is that one if the more you bring the harder it is unfortunately right so you can't just bring a million things of oxygen and i think the second thing is it's not just oxygen it's that at that elevation everything becomes like um so difficult um because the concentration of everything decreases like even with oxygen it's still hard like the the reason why you train is you go to higher base camps because as your body adjusts to a higher elevation i think you get more it's more hemoglobin in your blood that allows you to function with less oxygen.

Yeah, see, I'm not suggesting that each of my Sherpas carry an extra three bottles, making our summit more difficult. I'm going to add three or four Sherpas. Oh, just bring a 20-year-old squad. I have an entourage of Sherpas. Actually, if you look at that video, that's just Kyle and his Sherpas. That's just, they're all with me. They've all got a bottle of Tito's

because that won't freeze. It just gets thick and delicious. Yeah, I feel like if you just bring enough oxygen, then it's just a really, really hard hike. And you can train for that. Wait a minute. I think one of the Sherpas

or two should just have a bungee cord to lighten up your hike. Latch it onto his belt. There's some... We've got to figure this out. No, no, no. One of those... What do they call that thing where you strap the baby

onto your chest facing you? A baby Bjorn? I need to be strapped to a Sherpa's chest for some of this journey. Don't tell anybody. You know that contraption that four people would carry? Maybe Cleopatra would. They're like hobbits.

Come on. What is this thing that Greek royalty would be in? Everyone would have a stick and Cleopatra would just carry her. No, no, no. The thing you carry the important person with has the stick sticking out of it. It's like a carriage, but no wheels. Just bars you hang on to. I always thought that looked like the dopest mode

of locomotion. It's a good way to get to the top of Everest. I'm sure it's exhausting for the other people, but you know. I don't know. The slaves in movies don't seem to mind. They feel glad to have jobs. Absolutely. They're happy to be gainfully employed for the rest of their life.

What else were they going to do? That'd be such a funny pro-slavery take where it's like, well, unemployment numbers are at zero. All right, zero. You lose your job, you become a slave slave some of the housing might not even have been as bad as section eight so you know who knows that's true yeah that's i heard a i heard a radio commercial today today for uh bowl and branch you know that company that does the bed sheets and they're like all of our cotton is hand-picked and i was like wait what do we have video of this do you have video of them hand-picking the cotton because I gotta see it I gotta man I want to see like an SNL skit of a

black man trying to get that job and genuinely wanting it and the interviewer being like hey Mr. Johnson come on oh oh. You sure you want this job? You know, we've got marketing and there's maybe you could do some graphic design. No, no, no. I'm here to pick the cotton. No, no, no, no, no. Are you

telling me you're discriminating against me? No, definitely not. Definitely not. We need a new vice president for overseas affairs. No, no, no. I'm here to pick the cotton. It sounds like an idea that SNL would take that would be a really funny two-minute skit, and they would find a way to turn it into a 15-minute skit.

They got really bored. Right. They just offer more and more jobs. And at the end, you've got the Vietnamese guy coming in like, I'm here to pick the rice. Wrong door. Wrong door. SNL made fun of itself that way. George Foreman got the Vietnamese guy coming in. Like, I'm here to pick the rice. Wrong door. Wrong door. SNL made fun of itself that way. George Foreman was the guest, the boxer.

And he came on. I think he was Incredible Hulk. He smashed something. Then he came on. He smashed something else. He smashed something else. And after a while, he's like, this is the problem with SNL. It's just one joke you drag skits out of.

I thought it was a sort of meta thing. I liked it. Yeah. Chiz and I have been watching a lot of uh snl uh clips and like obviously if you watch a whole snl there's gonna be a lot of bad to make and a few and a few gems but when you just watch the best shit it's it's pretty fucking good there were a lot of great clips um there's this one with bill hater doing this puppet where like it the idea is it's a puppet class and it's like and I Want to thank Seth MacFarlane the guy does family guy. He's like the leader of the puppet class

He's like hey, welcome to puppetry an entry to puppetry, you know class number one Stevens won't you tell us about your puppet and Steve's like this is mr. Goofball and he likes to eat pizza Great great voice. I like it it i like it a lot how about you diane my puppet's name is diana and he does and how about you over there and he's dressed he's a vietnam vet with like gray hair and like thousand yards stare and he and he pulls up his puppet and it's identical and he's like he's like my name is private philip coleman anderson and i've seen shit and it's just like the whole thing is like this this war-torn like terror like like scarred individual like getting it out through his puppet like talking about his

friends being shot down in vietnam and like torch and it also sounds prone to same joke again and again they did it twice They did it twice. They did it twice. That was it. He's like, when the higher ups come down and they say there's a village up three clicks away and they want it gone. So I just waded into that village

spraying liquid death. And it's just like, all right, let's go back to you, Phil. How's your puppet? It's pretty good. I like that one a lot. hater is fucking hilarious i gotta start watching that show uh barry i think it is uh where he's the he's the like the hired killer who wants to be an actor comedy yeah yeah i i gotta i want to see that it reminds me of bill hater he is really funny very talented guy uh his impressions are incredible. Yeah. Especially if you deep fake him.

This is the thing. It caught my attention because it's something that Taylor had talked about a couple of times. And it's difficult to tell what's appropriate censorship and what's not. So Rotten Tomatoes is now only accepting reviews for people that verify that they saw the movie. for people that verify that they saw the movie. So they're looking for guys who have movie ticket stubs or Fandango receipts or something like that. That works. The problem that they're having

is sometimes people are almost politically motivated against a movie. And they're smashing it without having seen it. See, this doesn't sound right. Or the opposite. They're pumping it up without having seen it. I need to see evidence of that that's possible too yeah but um so then like like captain marvel got slammed so they just like erased all the because it got slammed before it even came out is is this

just is this also for the audience score because i've always just looked at the audience because i trust that more than the reviewers okay yeah this is just the audience score and uh so people were just like submitting stuff movies i hadn't seen uh cat marvel got was like in a hole it couldn't dig itself out of before it was released to theaters so now they're requiring uh ticket stubs to review stuff i like that dude who hates a potential superhero movie enough to go on rotten tomatoes and give it a one star i made 85 fucking. I mean, 85 accounts. Who fucking cares? 85 accounts. Man, there are people... Sorry, go ahead.

No, go ahead. I was going to say, there are people that are obsessed with Captain Marvel. This was one of my favorite, and not even like as the... ...JW, like not even because of that. But like, I remember when Captain Marvel came out, because people don't know anything about how movies work or whatever. You know, like the early box office numbers, like on like the first like 10 minutes were like 40 million somewhere and people were posting uh pictures

of like oh look nobody's at the theater nobody's seeing this feminist blah blah blah movie for the record i saw the movie and i thought it was like pretty blah not not good at all i liked it more regardless okay okay yeah i was i thought it was super boring um but people were so ass pain and they were so they were just dancing on its grave and then when the numbers started to roll in especially once it passed like the billion dollar like revenue mark oh my god there's this guy called the quartering i think this guy had like 30 videos on is it brie larson is that the actress's name people were obsessed with how horrible they said this movie i don't know where these ticket sales are coming from. Liberals are pumping that maybe the box office conspiracy Jews. Oh, my God.

Crazy. What is the reason they dislike Captain Marvel? I know the SJW angle. Is Captain Marvel always a woman? Let me answer this one. So Destiny said it's a female lead, and he's right. That's part of it. I saw the movie.

I didn't think it was very girl power, the movie. I didn't see the trailers and such until after I saw the movie i didn't think it was very girl power the movie i didn't see the trailers and such until after i saw the movie the advertisements were pretty girl power in my opinion so i could see how people who didn't even see the movie might push back against it because you know there she is looking fly in her costume and it just seemed a little girl power you know like all the most girl power scenes put together in 30 seconds and it looked like they were doing that for those of us who don't know anything about the marvel universe it captain marvel was always a woman right mostly yeah yeah okay well then why are marvel people change like gender and and fucking color and everything like

a million times so yeah you probably yeah yeah the most common iteration is carol daniels or whatever the pilot there's a black captain america but the white guy steve rogers is like the captain there's also old captain america you know there's there's hulk thor they do a lot of crazy shit in the marvel comics i didn't know there was a hulk. Is that a real one? They just mix shit together. No, they're always mixing shit together. Oh, I thought you meant that they fucked. There's a Lady Thor.

I think in the current run of the comics right now, Thor may be a one. If you were to go to a comic book store and buy... Okay, that's one that doesn't make any sense. Thor? That's not a Lady Thor. Alright, bigot! Maybe you can get a fucking fuck across some frozen ground Show me your ticket stub before you give me your opinion i haven't seen a marvel movie in theaters ever i don't or no i saw

iron man one in 2008 when people when people start making these arguments where it's like would this superhero really be a female like does it really make sense that the female body would have this much power and it's like we have fucking aliens and other dimensions and magic shit and like infinity stones like is this really the one point of realism that you're going to like take issue with like the fact that this female superhero was in space for 60 days without tampons like that's gonna be the thing that like come on dude like chill out yeah female superheroes herself away from a period that's one of my favorite areas for women to have like that girl power space right like like if it's a female in a western i'm like come on come on i love this i agree with you completely

but there's also another angle it's like i'm fine if women are powerful in some sort of fantasy but not in real life you bring up some some gooks and some goblins and shit and and girls are powerful there in that realm then all right but don't have some everyday office lady have have any power whatsoever no but like i completely agree with you though about like superheroes is i don't even watch these movies but if there's like a character who's supposed to be like physically really dominant and the actor isn't at least a little bit jacked, I'm like, come on. You want the best example?

Taylor, name an action hero that you could beat up easily. I got Tom Cruise. You can't take him. I can beat the shit out of Tom Cruise. I think that I could take... Who's that British guy who's in Snatch? You're wrong.

Jason Statham? You picked a bad one! Is he actually tough? Dude, they're all actors! They're all fucking actors! I talked about Adam Latham. He's going to pretend to be another guy really well while I pull his head into the dirt. You know what Jason Statham did before he became an actor?

Yeah, he was a writer. He was a member of the SAS. Okay, well, I didn't know that. Then I redact that. I'm sorry, Mr. Statham. I'm making that up. He was a theater major.

You could probably kick his ass. Oh, okay. You had me going. I believe that. You're like, shit. He is big, though. It's like you picked Hugh Jackman or something. We all picked Tom Cruise because he's 5'2". I'm trying to remember. Who's a small action star?

I'll pony up the money for watching this fight. I linked a picture of Statham or whatever. I want to see Taylor fight him. I do, too. Well, not that version of him. You could be on the KSI undercard, you and Jason Statham. Just get my shit pushed in by Jason Statham.

That would be so funny. By the way, that version of him is from the Meg like a year and a half ago. Okay, well then help me find somebody better. Matt Damon's aging. What's Captain Marvel Whoever plays her Brie Larson I can take her for sure

You can take better than me Name a female action star you can't beat up That's the real hard one Ronda Rousey He's calling her an action star I think the star part She's a female action actress. What was her last film?

Because it was her last film. The one with Stallone? What is the one with the ensemble cast? Expendables. That'll be her last movie ever probably. Yeah, I wouldn't want to fight her. She knows techniques and moves. Yeah, she's probably legitimately

top 20 toughest woman in the world. She's about to have a baby anyway. Then I could take her. Ooh, the timing is right, Taylor. Bam! Her boyfriend will kill you. Oh shit, I forgot about her boyfriend. I don't want to fight anyone anymore.

No, Brie Larson is a good pick. I like it. Mickey Rourke? Mickey Rourke has gotten just old enough that he's going to take a real beatdown. He was in The Wrestler eight years ago. He's a real fighter, though. Man, he's shorter than I thought he would be. Well, wait. If we're going that, what about

Denzel Washington or Liam Neeson? They might have a heart attack, right? I do not want to fight Liam Neeson. I would rather fight Liam than Denzel. I feel like when I watch Liamam neeson films maybe this is just me but it feels like when i'm watching it it feels like they're trying real hard with the editing to make a guy that's pretty slow like look a lot tougher than he actually is not an athletic runner and he does a lot of running and here's a better question i fell for the movie called the algebra teacher Who are the action stars that you absolutely wouldn't want to fuck with?

Let's remove the ones who are former WWE stars. Is The Rock a former wrestler? Yes, of course The Rock is a... I don't watch wrestling. Wait, I don't think... His name is The Rock. Wait, do you think he was born with that name? I thought it was just a cool-ass name.

He was a professional wrestler. He was a professional wrestler. He was a professional wrestler, not a wrestling wrestler. All right, well, you know, I'm a little bit of a retard right now. He played college football. Miami, I think. He was second from starting for maybe the Buccaneers behind Warren Sapp or somebody. The guy who started in front of him was a famous player. Well, that guy is enormous.

Yeah, he's like keanu reeves i keep calling him apparently that guy's like a i don't know if he's bjj purple belt or if i made that up but like he legit picks up like movie skills for these movies yeah gun people kyle's one of them can attest to the fact that he's actually good with a weapon now like i can't i could beat the shit out of Harrison Ford. He's a hundred years old. No people over 70.

Then my list is getting shorter and shorter. That's half the guys I can beat up, Kyle. How about the kid that plays Spider-Man? What's his name? Which Spider-Man? I'm talking Tobey Maguire, of course oh mcguire andrew garfield or uh the new one holland tom holland tom holland oh that guy's five eight i can take him

yeah i think so too he looks very skinny you know i feel like he didn't get ripped like toby mcguire did toby mcguire back in the day it's easy to forget but when he was in that first spider-man movie they did that thing where they so he wakes up on day one like as peter parker and he's getting dressed in front of the mirror and he's like a nerdy guy he's he's not fat he's not he's very skinny like no muscle tone whatsoever and then he gets bitten by the radioactive spider and the next day he wakes up do the same routine you saw him do the first day well they skip forward like a year and in that year he had a nutritionist and a personal trainer and probably some roids and he takes off that fucking shirt or whatever and he's just like like he's got pecs he's got like everything is just ripped to fucking shreds that was the scene that made me want to see that

movie i so i i saw that scene as a trailer in front of another yeah and uh dude like he what happens is he surprises himself he He wakes up the next morning. He doesn't know anything's changed. He's just getting dressed, and he has maybe a full-length mirror, and he's just like, oh, look at me. That's cool. Yeah, that's really cool. That would be the coolest feeling in the world,

just waking up with a six-pack. Wouldn't that be nice? That'd be so sick. He wakes up, and he's top 1% of the world fitness. Better than that. He's top, like, 0.02% in the world fitness he looks like he had to be on roids he looks so much better i think it was joe rogan who said if you take the steroids out of hollywood jonah hill's the healthiest guy there you have to consider for hollywood like getting their bodies

like built for these movies is their job and i don't think there's regulations on roiding so yeah absolutely is not. There's laws against it, but they just get a doctor to prescribe the steroids for various conditions. I didn't know that was how it worked. I thought they just turned a blind eye to actors. Well, because there's a lot of people that look at people gaining...

Man, I think it was... Was it Chris Pratt? Yeah. He got jacked. In six months, impossible progress right like one of the biggest like markers of like if somebody is juicing is like how quickly do you make progress and some of these guys begin impossibly jack Christian Bale has done it too where he's gone

from nothing to like absolutely fucking shredded in like months like months periods of time you can tell that Tom Hardy when he played Bane was on him briefly not long enough because he's got like the telltale steroid traps. Yeah. That meat right below your ears.

Mark Wahlberg was on them for sure, for his entire life. Who's the guy that played Creed? Oh, Michael B. Jordan? Yeah. That guy is on roids. Absolutely. One of the telltale signs of roid growth is their deltoids respond super well they're called capped deltoids or something and he's just bulked out there all

right so this brings me to what something i wanted to talk about rambo five i think it's rambo five so there was first blood and that's in oregon after the war right that's when the police chiefs him up, calls him like a war deserter coward, beats him up, hits him with the hose, the de-lousing. And then they fight it out in the Oregon wilderness. Nobody dies in that movie, if I remember correctly. But it's a very good, you know, Vietnam War statement. Then the second Rambo is a flashback. He goes, you see him in Vietnam doing his thing, if I remember correctly. But he's in Vietnam fighting.

His girlfriend gets killed. He kills a lot of Russians. He's got the bow. He's cut the throats. Then Rambo 3, he goes into Afghanistan and he fights with the Afghanistanis. The good guys. The good guys. The Mujahideen. As they said at the end credits of the movie,

thank you to the brave and gallant muzha hadin no they didn't they absolutely did that's been edited google that one right now you'll see it that was back when afghanistan was the good guys and russia was the bad guys absolutely it was 80s so he he fights them and the third one because they've kidnapped his mentor his colonel or whatever and then the fourth one of course i want to say it's like cambodia they keep renaming those fucking countries down there laos or whatever but anyway he's down in one of those countries in southeast asia and the uh the missionaries uh there's a blonde lady who's who

played dexter's wife and the dexter show she's one of them they get kidnapped by like the most evil fucking like military like militant group ever like This guy is literally a pedophile who machine guns civilians. They impale babies on bayonets and throw them into fires and stuff. Rambo has to go in and make things right along with a team of mercenaries. The Mujahideen. Yeah. The gallant Mujahideen. That was only a few years ago, maybe eight, 10 years ago. I liked that one a lot. Very gory. The goriest of all the Rambo movies. He disembowels a man at one point. It's great. He gets on a.50 cal

and he starts and people are exploding like they're fucking rodents getting shot with a rifle. Whole heads blow up. Whole chest explode. It's good shit. At the end, he's like, I'm going back to where it all began

and you see him walking down a dusty road to arizona and they're on a mailbox rambo it's his parents house he's going home finally after i've you know he left from vietnam and he never went home again and finally he's going home well the new rambo picks up parents have died the name is great because they're like 150 and he's fighting the mexican drug cartel and the trailer really got me pumped up he's still he looks he looks like he'd still do it to me he looks fit enough you know still owns on all kinds of drugs and he's still got that gravelly voice and he still can sharpen a fucking knife and make a booby trap, so I'm sold. I'm down for this new Rambo. What's the title? Last Blood.

It went from First Blood to Last Blood, which I like, because I think Stallone's over 70 now, so there's not going to be a Rambo very last blood. Annoyingly jacked for a guy his age. It's like, goddammit, I'm going to look like a piece of shit by the time I'm that age, if I make it. You're 72 and you're

ripped out of your mind. I'm ready for this rambo movie i it's been in production for a while i've kind of been following it a little bit whenever an article would come out i'd read up on it i knew they were spying the mexican drug cartel for a while and uh and yeah i'm pumped there's definitely a scene where like he gets the shit beaten out of him by like 40 like cartel members and you're like oh this is the inciting event they have fucked up Mr.. Stallone, let's give it one more go try to enunciate Some of those Dark Knight scenes where they went a little bit too hard on the Batman voice. I'm screaming at the juggernaut.

I'm sorry, Batman. I can't understand what you're saying. It's like, where is the fucking other? I don't think the Joker's... There's a quote in the trailer that says, I want them to know that death is coming. Oh, yeah. That would have been the funniest little dialogue in batman with bane

where he's like i don't even know where you're going has anyone here has anyone here heard the the original bane voice before they went back and re-edited it no i didn't even know there was one i i want to say i swear to god i heard this at one point in time but i haven't been able to find it but they originally had his voice and it sounded like you actually couldn't understand a lot of what bane was saying and they went back and they redubbed i think almost all of it jizz does a really good bane damn there's a coffee cup involved in the impression but he you know he does do a really good bane that was, I loved that movie.

Even though there were a lot of dumb parts and silly things. And I don't have the perspective of seeing all these superhero movies that Marvel released, but those three movies are my favorite superhero movies all time. They're so good.

Who directed that? Nolan? Yeah. All of Nolan's later movies are really good until you look at him a little bit too close and by that i mean like at all like um i think the entire like instigating plot of the um of the dark knight rises is actually absurd like the like basically what happens is if somebody breaks into the stock exchange the new york stock exchange right the gotham stock exchange and then the next day the richest man, the New York Stock Exchange, right? The Gotham Stock Exchange. And then the next day,

the richest man in the world happens to lose all of his money and nobody thinks twice about it. That's like the whole start of the movie. Everybody's like, oh, that's how strange that that happened to you, Bruce. And yeah. I watched the action scene.

Yeah, well, when you put it like that. I saw there's a YouTuber. He does, I think he works in Hollywood. He did some editing critique of the action scene where there's like the chasing a tractor trailer and the Batmobile is doing. If you try to actually follow it intellectually, it's impossible. He's on the left side. He's on the front. You have no idea.

You're inside the car. You can't tell what's up and down. That's the point of Batman. The things they establish become untrue seconds later you know like now we're looking in the direction it's traveling now we're looking out the back and there's been no you know that transition that third batman movie is so bad it really is a shit one with bane yeah the one with bane it's bad it's a bad movie it's not a good movie i liked it bad movie i like it i need to read there are a I liked it. There are a lot of problems, man.

There are a lot of problems in that fucking movie. But if your heart didn't do a little flutter when the fire goes up and that bat thing appears, there's something goddamn wrong with you as an American, okay? You should have had a good feeling in yourself. My suspicions went up because

how did he fucking do that? He's fucking Batman. What do you mean? I wish they had shown the eight hours that must have taken him attaching the rappelling gear and getting some of it wrong and being like, fuck! And having to remove whatever flares or whatever he's using to do that and getting sore and stopping for a sandwich because he's going to get hungry halfway. He's not a superhero.

He's just a rich guy. It seems like you're wasting a good bit of time here when you could be out fighting baddies. Shut up, Bobby Butler! This is going to be cool. There's a bomb. This is going to be so cool. There's a nuclear weapon ticking down and he's up there hammering flares

into the Brooklyn Bridge. The worst part is the fight. The stadium blowing up was cool. The worst part is the fight at the end. In broad daylight. That was dumb, you're right. You don't put Batman in broad daylight. It's not a good look. It's like having sex with a fat girl.

You do it in the dark. You turn the lights all the way off and you just get flashes and you're like, oh yeah, that makes sense. There's no way that me and three of my buddies could beat up a guy in an armored suit trained in combat who we can't even see very well. We can't get ahold of him. He's like, he's like Tom Hardy greased up in that movie. Like maybe you lay hands on him once, but God, is he covered in razor blades? And where did he go? But when it's broad daylight and he's showing up

with messed up vertebrae, blown out knees and he's just like, bring it on. It's like, I don't think Grab the Batman! Good! Good! Stab him in the eye! They didn't bring any guns!

Nobody brought a gun! Nobody brought a fucking gun to that fight! You won't talk about suspending disbelief. There were gun laws in Gotham, stupid. No, it was like Gangs of New York style, though. The whole point of Batman is that a guy with a gun killed his parents, right? Well, that guy was breaking the law. Oh, well, Bane is literally leading a militia that's taking over the entire fucking city and the police department.

They have the police department buried underground. They have access to the entire armory. They have access to everything. And yet somehow nobody's got a gun. When Batman showed up there at the end with all the police department and they're doing that fucking cliche where you slap the billy cub on their hand like, Time to throw down, Mr. Bane. Like a West Side Story story he should have just gone boom and killed that guy and like when you're a jet you're a jet all the way from your first

cigarette to your last dying day not just me i don't know why but it feels like they were too scared to like actually choreograph any bite and any Batman fighting, which is very weird. Because in all of Batman's lore, he's the king fucking martial artist. And even in the beginning of The Dark Knight, or I'm sorry, Batman Begins, right? That's right. Yeah, they show him going to learn the ninjutsu shit and everything. And you're led to believe that he's very physically adept. And when you watch the Marvel Captain America,

that's how I would expect that man to fight, doing crazy flips and fighting. But the fight between him and Bane, it was like the old action figures. Remember growing up how they had two points of movement where you'd twist the torso? It was like Rock'em Sock'em Robots. Yeah. Yeah.

And the whole fight, he was like, ugh, ugh, ugh. And I'm like, what the fuck? They couldn't spend a little bit more money on this part? What'd they use all the budget on? It doesn't make sense at all to me. And that's why I like John Wick a lot, right? I really like John Wick because 90% of it, maybe 85%, whatever, is very legit.

Like from the martial arts to the gunplay to the gun-fu, which is the fusion of the two, the driving, all that stuff. Keanu's doing most of that stuff. They're not putting some CGI in and making him look like he just jumped a car. They jump a fucking car. They're not making it look like he just reloaded a gun. He reloaded a gun. He's throwing the punches. He's doing the throws.

He's doing the jujitsu. He's doing all of it. And when you see the behind the scenes of him training and shooting three gun, pistol, rifle, shotgun, he could really do it. it it's quite impressive i really like the reloads for some reason that's incredibly important to me and john wick how me too if if this gun has seven rounds in it he never shoots more than seven rounds between reloads like i don't know why but that's like incredibly important to me and it's one of the it's very important to me too i buy it does take you out of the moment if someone has a revolver

and they go like, blam, blam, blam, blam, blam, blam, blam. Blam, blam, blam, blam, blam. It's like, where's this fucking coming from? Or sometimes when you see a movie where somebody would go to shoot somebody and the guy would be like, hey, there's no magazine in your gun. And it's like, oh, well, did you rack the slide?

It's a good stuff. Yeah, where they just eject the magazine and somehow like the bullet inside the gun is like disappeared i've seen so many instances of it like one of the big things is sound mixing um hollywood loves the pump of the shotgun they love to throw that in that's like fucking that's like a that's their lens flare the audio guy for the audio guy a shotgun pumping is their lens flare they they're like let's throw in a couple shotgun pumps wait two but he's holding a gun throw it in there anyway the kids love it and like the guy will have like a double barrel shotgun you don't pump double well sometimes you pump double barrel shotguns

but not the one he had all intents and purposes you don't pump it you don't pump them and he's just like boom boom and you're wait, where was the chick chick? Yeah. Or in like, you go back to Anaconda. It's one of my favorites because it just, I was almost able to buy into John Voight fighting a giant Anaconda in the Amazon with Ice Cube and Jennifer Lopez until the point where he has a bolt action rifle and he's shooting at the Anaconda and he's shooting it semi automatically. He's just bang, bang, bang. He has a bolt action rifle and he's shooting at the Anaconda and he's shooting it semi-automatically.

He's just bang, bang. And I'm just like, the actor sees the bolt, right? Like, like, even if you don't know what a gun is, you've seen a movie where the guy, you know, does the bolt action. Like, it must be so disappointing for somebody. If you get to like your 20s or 30s, you've never held a gun shooting. And for your first time, you get to pick up an AR-15 and you pick it up off the table, I imagine how many people just move it and they're like,

it's not making any noise. I don't know. Anytime you pick up a gun it's like... It's really clicky. Where's all the clicks and pops? I remember the first time I got to play with a real sword with some Japanese kodachi or katana. I drew

it out, and all I heard was the sound of the metal kind of scraping against the wooden scabbard. I was like, this isn't the ching. Yeah, where is my ching? Like, what? It doesn't exist. It doesn't ring like that? Not at all. It never does, ever. Why would it ring? Unless you're pulling your sword out

of a metal casing. Another metal thing. Which is notoriously good. No, it's not metal. That would fuck up the blade. So the inside of scabbards are either bamboo, some other type of wood, or leather. And so the sound of drawing a sword is... No wonder they change it.

Yeah. It sounds like you're drawing a chopstick or something across a table. As I think about it, I don't know why you'd have a metal... Is it called a scabbard? Because that would be really heavy. Way heavier than better alternatives like leather. Yeah, absolutely.

Yeah, but it does... That's something I'm willing to suspend my disbelief on. When you see a couple sword fighters go in, if I heard a... coming out of that, it would take me out of it. I'm going to hear the... You know, they really amp up the moment. One of my favorites, favorite while we're doing this i always plug this as much as i can my absolute favorite gunplay movie of all time which is an insanely weird movie maybe underrated i

don't know most people seem to like it is fucking tom cruise and collateral that movie is on fucking point i've never seen that it's very good it's very good when he comes in the alley oh my god yeah oh it's so good it's so well done he when he puts two in the chest and he reloads before he takes a final shot oh it's such a fucking i love that movie uh i really like that everything is like very tight and very concise in that yeah he's a very cool character in that movie he's got the what the gray hair and uh jamie foxx is real thrown off by the whole thing. He's killing motherfuckers It's great, it's it's really good collateral is great. That's a great movie. I was what was I say about Tom Cruise earlier? I Don't know. I don't buy it. He's a great actor, but I have a hard time

Oh, we were talking about like movies where actors were miscast as action stars Okay, and the biggest one for me ever is Jack Reacher Jack Reacher, you know, one for me ever is Jack Reacher. Jack Reacher, we've talked about... Essentially, Jack Reacher, it's this series of novels about this retired military guy who's now become kind of a crime fighter.

Is it Tom Clancy, I think, maybe? I don't think so. And his thing is he's a big, hulking guy. The Rock is the perfect person to play him. He's literally the Rock size in the books. He's like 6'5 or something, 260. And there's parts of the books where he'll kill someone with a bear hug.

Or he'll break a neck with his bare hands. That's cool. He's a very rough and tumble, scary guy like he's out to do good in a bad way cool character and uh and he's also a bit of a like a detective like he'll show up something will go wrong and he'll show up into town uh you know somebody call him like like i need jack reacher and jack will show up and he'll get to the bottom of it and he'll beat and torture a team absolutely and they cast tom cruise and there's this one scene where like he's in the bar and these guys are just trying to pick a fight with him and uh they keep on and they keep on and he's like all right and

they go out in the streets and uh they're squaring up you know tom cruise is like getting his dukes up and the other four or five young punks are getting ready too. They've been hired to take him out. Tom Cruise doesn't know this at the time. Before they start, he goes, wait, before we start, I just want you to remember,

you wanted this. And he beats the dog shit out of all five of them in a very convincing way. He catches a kick, punches the guy in the nuts, throws that guy down are they having to do like lord of the rings style filming to like make the hobbits look smaller than gandalf because i think he's only like five five or something no they show him as a little fellow

that and and he's a little guy you know he's still him i'm sure he's got his lifts in and everything get him on up to five five but uh throughout these films and there's two of them i i have a hard time with tom cruise beating you know 45 year old tom cruise beating up so many young strong looking guys with his bare hands for the most part like he really i mean there's a lot of weapon play uh there's there's sniping and machine gunning and handguns and knives and stabbing knives and stabbing weapons. But come on, he's a little fella. Don't put him in there.

I can buy Mission Impossible. He's kind of a secret agent. All right, I'll buy it. I'll buy it because he's so goddamn good at them. And somehow they keep getting better. Every sequel is better than the last. I can do it. Just put The Rock in that role and just retcon it to make the guy Samoan.

Perfect. I don't know if this is something related to tom cruise but he there's this thing where i feel like when i read like plot synopses i just feel like he's in movies that have no business being good but they end up being like decent movies like every time like i don't know if i've seen a tom cruise movie he's the anti leonardo dicaprio yeah like he finds bad scripts and makes them great you never walk out of a tom cruise movie thinking like god that movie is fucking horrible like maybe not as great as it could have been

but like um what was it like the what was the the world and tomorrow end of tomorrow whatever yeah like that was an okay movie i like that movie more than you was that no no not the day after tomorrow it's it's the war of the worlds oh oh oh i was thinking of a different one right that's brad pitt that's

brad pitt he wasn't uh what the hell i can't seconds ago kyle just said he was in world of war world war of the worlds i was the one where like beyond tomorrow maybe is that um with the time travel oh oh um oh. That's Live, Die, Repeat. Yeah, that was the original tagline. It might have had a different name in America. It did. Live, Die, Repeat. That's so dumb.

Well, they did change it. Live, Die, Repeat. Oh, you expect to live, die, repeat. Edge of Tomorrow. Yeah, that was really good, I thought. Edge of Tomorrow was great. And it just goes to show expect to live. Edge of Tomorrow. That was really good, I thought. Edge of Tomorrow was great. He has made so many really good movies

that aren't thought of as top tier. They just fly under the rug. Collateral, Edge of Tomorrow, Minority Report. You ever see Minority Report? It's a Steven Spielberg movie. That one's amazing special effects and sci-fi. They craft a whole future reality

where they have these three individuals who can see the future and they're keeping them in this tank and they just predict crimes of the future. And I'm not talking about huge world-ending crimes. They're not stopping future Hitlers. They're

stopping a jealous husband from stabbing his wife. And you get this, all of a sudden this new police department gets a report hey woody's gonna stab jackie in three hours we gotta get there and they fucking fly in with like hovercrafts storm in and they like pull his arm back before he can like you know is it like that or are they like innocent like can they claim like claim like, I wasn't gonna. Oh, wait, that's the whole part of the movie. And that is the plot of the movie. The minority report is that one report that was wrong. Where the guy was thinking about it. He wanted to.

And he was gonna. My bad. Sorry. But he didn't. But he didn't. And the plot of the movie is Tom Cruise is this law enforcement agent who's doing this shit. And all of a sudden they show up for him because they think he's going to kill a guy. And so the whole movie is him running from his own agency being like, I don't even know this man.

I don't even know this man you think I'm going to kill. And I'm not going to spoil it because it's an excellent movie. But it doesn't end the way Tom thinks it's going to end. And it doesn't end the way the audience thinks it's going to end knowing because it's an excellent movie, but it doesn't end the way Tom thinks it's going to end, and it doesn't end the way the audience thinks it's going to end, knowing more than Tom. It's a really cool ending because it's kind of a mind fuck what's going on. There's a lot going on.

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I received it today. It came in this fancy little box. And there was an envelope that said, do not unbox before show. And so I threw that envelope in the trash immediately, of course. Never read it. I did not read it either. Yeah, didn't read it either. But here are the watches.

Like them a lot. The red part is wood. And it's real fancy. It's not rough wood. It's been like Gloucester. High quality wood. This isn't the kind of wood that some huckster is trying to sell you. This is the best wood out there.

Good wood. I read the thing that said not to unbox it, so I didn't. There's a heft to it. Oh, la-dee-da. Woody read the instructions for the hat ring. What a surprise. As long as we don't have another 100% food situation,

we're good. You could totally use this as a weapon. I actually think this watch is pretty cool. Yeah, I'm a fan. I like mine a lot. I'm going to put it right here. I got the Aviator. And I actually like the one Kyle picked a lot, too.

Kyle picked first, though I wanted to be sure to get one that he didn't get. I mentioned that to Woody. I was like, hey, we picked the same watch, just different colors. And he's like, I like yours better. And I was like, I like yours better. I didn't see his color before, and after I got mine, I was like, damn it. Woody went second

and got the better one. I fucked myself here. Now I forgot to respond to Chiz's message. And so he picked mine out, and I it it's more like an ad for the bumblebee movie maybe if i could reach to the screen and swap with woody i totally would right now i prefer the darker color but i like the red i'm happy with what i got but uh but yeah i like what he's a lot best of the bunch in my opinion if it makes you feel better, Kyle, I also like Woody's more. Now I want to keep it.

I'm not trading with you. Mine's the best because you guys said it was. You're like the kid on the playground way back in the day when you were trading Pokemon cards and you wanted to trade for something and then someone's like, no, don't trade that one for that. And suddenly you're like, oh, a new

sense of value for this car has been imbued on me totally what happened of course then i'm not trading that i was so dumb once when i was like nine that this kid went over to his house and he swindled me he was like all right you give me your hollow foil nido king and i'll give you a hundred energy cards and i was just like 101 can't miss and then later realized like back at home like oh you fucking retard you give me that one ten dollar bill i'll give you a hundred pennies yeah oh just by volume alone and wait i'm winning are we on to my topic now? This is the one So I have talked a couple of times About this idea that

If you have a porn video of you On the internet It used to be oh my gosh it's on there It'll never go away this is a problem And then it transitioned to Oh actually there's so much Porn on the internet it's just Lost in a sea right You can't get pee out of the ocean You can't so much porn on the internet, it's just lost in a sea, right?

You can't get pee out of the ocean. You can't get your video off the internet. Those are just things that seem parallel to me. But it can get lost in the ocean or the internet. Well, this guy has taken facial recognition software against porn and matched it up against social media like Facebook and Instagram and he has a hundred thousand

people, regular people, identified in their porn videos so far. So this idea that you're kind of buried could switch and we could be like, hey you know, I want to Google Taylor, not sure if his last name is in the public.

And just like, you know, fine. That guy's pretty cool. This guy's a piece of shit. This guy's an absolute piece of shit. And if this gets out, the amateur porn industry will be destroyed such

that it is. This guy is PKA's cool guy of the week. No, Kyle, the homemade industry which is what you guys clued me into absolutely are you familiar with tiny eye i don't know it is that a website yeah so tiny eye lets you uh it's a reverse image searching uh thing so you can like you can give it an image and you can find out if it exists somewhere out on the uh the interweb oh okay it's really good if someone's trying to catfish you um you know if somebody's like hey this is me i'm britney you'd be like oh really britney because it trying to catfish you. If somebody's like, hey, this is me. I'm Brittany. You'd be like, oh, really, Brittany?

Because it looks like you were on the fucking box of Kellogg's Frosty Flakes in 1997, you lying whore. And she's like, yeah, we sold a lot of flakes that year. Like, you lying bitch.

Dude, this guy's a fucking douchebag. I love that you guys have such a strong stance against people being identified. You're bitch. Dude, this guy's a fucking douchebag. I love that you guys have such a strong stance against people being identified. You're right. You're right. I just... I think your venom is funny. I'm not that.

You're like, I'm going to get busted. This guy's an asshole. Every opinion on this show I give is hard and fast in one way. It doesn't matter if that's what I believe. Yeah. So that guy is ruining a lot of people's fun. fast in one way. It doesn't matter if that's what I believe. That guy is ruining a lot of people's fun, and so I give him two thumbs down. He is not PKA's

cool guy of the week. He has successfully identified 100,000 young ladies, so we're safe. Ladies! I already picked PKA's cool guy of the week, being the guy who decided that the female squash players who won their tournament should get dildos as prizes.

That was last week. That's the cool guy. I know. The cool guy of last week. Sorry. I want to see that locker room experience where they're all opening up their fucking rabbits and they're just like and a couple of them are like,

this is disgusting. This is disgusting, Stacy. And the one of one of them's just like i don't know it's seven functions you know one of them's like you're right this is an outrage give me everything you guys got and i'm gonna take it to the gm tournament jackie and i won a dildo once we uh we were all you had to do is take it up to the hills take it up i don't understand anyway we were on like the newlywed show it was at a bar environment so like you went up we sat on stools we did whatever and they asked you questions about how well you knew your partner and we were kind of intimidated we were only dating and there was like a married couple and an engaged couple and something else and it seemed like we had a couple clues. If there were any song questions, it was Brown Eyed Girl, and that was one.

If there were any penis questions, the answer was the most flattering answer available. I think that was at least one, but we won. Then there were a bunch of adult prizes in there. It was like, ah. Was it a nice dildo? Did you get some use out of it? I don't think it was high-end or anything, no.

Yeah. I mean, I'm not familiar with the... I ordered one of those bad dragon dildos a while back. You know, the ones that look like a dragon's cock or like a... Dude, that is beyond degenerate. I know, right? And I ordered it in like March or something.

It's been a full almost 70 days. They custom make each one. And apparently the back order for dog, horse, dragon, and like tentacle cocks is such that they can't get this thing out to me. Oh, I got a huge horse cock. It's, no. Did you get like a cool see-through purple or like a metallic color? Yeah, it glows in the dark. There's going to be a backlog going through my order, Kyle.

You'll have to wait your turn in line. No, I got this weird tentacle. What are you sitting there like, man, mine must be showing up soon. No, I ordered 15,000 of these things. Kyle's won't be coming until July. Yeah, it really is absurd. But there's a lot of customization, so they can't have them all pre-made because there's like 15 different colors for each one,

all these weird patterns and stuff. And sizes. And sizes and firmness. And you choose whether you want the cum tube or not. And so this is a tube that goes in the back, and they sell this cum lube by, like, a gallon, and it's, like, thick, white, viscous lubricant that looks like jizz. And you've got this little ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch- So you can give yourself or your lady or whoever a dragon cock cream pie.

This has unlimited prank potential. It's great. But 70 days now, I could have made my own by now. I could have mastered some sort of technique. I could have figured something out. This man makes ballistics gel. He can make a bad dragon. That is right. I think ballistics

gel would lend itself well to this. I have some. One time use and three weeks of cleanup. That stuff gets gross actually. Now that I think about it, ballistics gel if you leave it too long, it gets real melty and gross and brown and stuff

and everything sticks to it. The bad dragon's Twitter account has 62,000 followers and it's just pictures of rubber dicks. Insane, Deldo. Yeah, that website has some crazy stuff. Oh, and they've got fleshlights made to look like mermaid vaginas. I'm not sticking my dick in that.

I saw those. I was like... I haven't seen it yet, but come on, live a little. This is... Who needs this much color in their fuck toys? People with mermaid fantasies. Yeah, absolutely. People with mermaid fantasies.

Dude, they would have to suck dick to have an intense fetish for something that's just not real. Yeah, like a furry. Look, I'll die on the hill that furries don't deserve equal rights to the rest of us. I know, we already started a furry i look i i'm i'll die on the hill that that furries don't deserve like equal uh equal equal rights to the rest of us like i know we already started the the web page and the discord and the group stomp a furry.org yeah stomp a furry dot you got the dog or dot org domain you had to

dot tv was taken and dot com was way too discerning for our tactics. And I thought.biz made us seem like a roughshod. We're not in this for the bills, alright? This is a work of passion. We're here to do God's work. The passion project. Yeah, I just don't fuck I think it's silly. It's just fucking silly.

It's just fucking silly! I understand if you like dicks. I understand if you feel like you'reicks i understand if you if you feel like you're a woman and you but you weren't born what i understand so many things but if you tell me that you are a fox who wants to fuck rabbits i don't believe you you're a weirdo i just don't believe you let me take a shot at this you Kyle. You have probably snuggled a dog. You probably snuggled a dog while your shirt is off. It's a pleasant experience.

It's warm. It's furry. It's a good thing. It's only a hop, skip, and a jump from there to fucking a furry. I don't know. Woody's winning me over. These are strong points. The listeners are like, yes, I have hugged a dog with my shirt off

and it was warm and nice. Nah. That's not what our listeners are going to say about that. That's not what we're going to see in a YouTube video. There's going to be some guy linking an album of him cuddling with his fucking dog with a smirk that's just a little bit too knowing and you're going to wonder what's going on with the cameras.

Back me up on this. Post your pictures of you hugging your dog with no shirt on. I understand bestiality more than the furry thing. It makes more sense to me. At least then you're attracted to another actual living creature.

Something that exists on this planet and does in fact have sex. But when you go... It just like a step away from the other fetishes like no latex people don't exist but you know they're just wearing latex the only way i'd be cool lingerie people don't exist it's something we put on that makes us look sexy gimp people in their tight leather doesn't exist but you put it on right they exist yeah yeah well furries exist by that measure, too. Let's put Steven in.

Yeah, imagine what if you had one of those fetishes that are totally... Is it giantism? Is that what you dream of, like having a woman that's like Godzilla-sized that picks you up and does stuff with your body? Or vor. Yeah.

Or vor, getting eaten by monsters. I don't know if you get off when they do that, but you're in their body being digested. It's very sexually charged. These are people who will never, ever get removed. You can do that if you want to. That's a dangerous fetish

to have. It's a one-off fetish, too. Bug chasing is. Bug chasers don't chase fireflies in a meadow and giggle with their family. Bug chase? Typically, isn't it gay people that go after like accumulating as possible right yeah yeah they want to get uh hr they want the hiv yeah and they want to get and they taylor read us this this post from a bug chaser about like the the depraved ways in which

he would go about chasing and he's like in some sort of like gay club like dark room type environment crawling on the floor on like i think there was broken glass but there was definitely used condoms everywhere and he was like he was talking explicitly about like i love going to this club taking my shoes off at the door hiding them in a booth and then searching for used condoms with my bare feet then i like to empty them into my mouth or ass you know it's like oh jesus dude like just just can you imagine wait i don't think you get hiv from from cum can you oh yeah that's where you get it yeah you get it i thought you got it from from micro tears that happen in your skin as you have sex and then that and then it transferred

blood that's part of it that's why it's so prevalent in the game sometimes is that like the asshole when you're pounding it like you're creating those micro tears and then if someone has hiv it is in their semen and then that can go into those tears oh i thought that was one of the reasons why getting circumcised is supposed to help against hiv is because your foreskin micro tears will appear in that more often than not so people that are circumcised don't have that happening another point in in Kyle's column. Another one. Another one.

You're never going to get me to be in favor of any kind of child genital mutilation. Yeah, unfortunately, we live in the US where people don't usually have HIV, so it's not really... Yeah, I'm opposite of Taylor.

I'm in favor of lots of child mutilation. You hear that, folks? Taylor likes AIDS babies. As many as he can get out there. As long as no one doctors their penis up a little bit. AIDS babies everywhere. Reigning long as no one doctors their penis up a little bit aids babies everywhere raining doctors that's that's fucking taylor's future that's the is that the world you want to live in where it's nothing but an eater cocked aids victims crawling

on the floor putting used condoms in their butts no no thank you taylor you know what you've flipped me entirely. I would think that one ill-structured sentence. No, no. Here's a way that you could get into to furry fucking Kyle. If the furry that you're fucking is just a mascot of a team that you hate. Now, it's still more of like a hate fuck. It doesn't have to be.

Who do the Atlanta Braves? Who's their rival uh we're not fans of the phillies um phillies so the philly frenetic the fanatic whatever he's bent over and he's got his little ass flap and then it's just a way for you to pound the philly fanatic you're telling me that doesn't get you a little long no it doesn't and look i i differentiate between like putting like the ears on a girl and like one of those tail butt plugs or something like that and going full to me a furry is someone who's into that full sonic the hedgehog suit i'm picturing a blue fox or like a a red like you know or like someone dresses the tasmanian devil essentially just covered in fur from head to toe they don't look human in any way they're just a bipedal cartoon character in a fucking mascot uniform with a with an ass flap and or a crotch flap i don't know why taylor

went the hate direction with it right like i'm a flyers fan well why can't i get jackie to dress up like gritty and go to town i I mean, that would be pretty funny. Honestly, Gritty is like they should teach about Gritty in marketing courses in college because he was instantly viral. It was insanely popular and immediately got co-opted

into so many memes, which is the way you want to promulgate your own image if you're in 2019. You got to get in the memes. And so, hats off to the Flyers. They did a fantastic job and they've promulgate your own image if you're in 2019. You've got to get in the memes. Hats off to the Flyers. They did a fantastic job and they've got bar none the most popular mascot in the NHL. I think they have one of the most beloved mascots in the

MLB. The Philly Fanatic. They got it down in Philly when it comes to mascots. Do you remember that wrestler who, this is kind of related, but wrestlers have those personas. Yeah, Chris Benoit. got it down in philly when it comes to mascots do you remember that wrestler who uh like this is kind of related but you know wrestlers have those personas yeah chris benoit no that was the one who murdered his family and then killed himself um the the other poor persona

oh man family side as which is what i'm calling that, is a real topic. No, it was this wrestler who he was like a brand new persona. I don't remember what he was. He was like Electro or something like that. And he literally came out. The Shock Master. The Shock Master. Yeah, it was the Shock Master.

It's one of the funniest videos on YouTube. If anybody out there is looking for a funny thing to watch, there is a WWE intro where they tried to take this guy and they put him in a stormtrooper helmet with sparkles all over it. And he's this big fat fuck. He's got like a fur cape on. And he was

supposed to come through the wall. He's called the Shockmaster. He's supposed to be the next big guy. And when they were introducing him, you know, the two teams of wrestlers are fighting and they're like, well you don't know who we have on our side, brother! The Shock Master! And he was supposed to burst through this wall

and they didn't tell him there's a two by four at the bottom of it. Are you sure we can watch it? If we can, it is so fucking worth it. Oh my god. I just watch it. You have to watch it. It's so fucking funny. I don't know. Last week we watch it. Alright, I will give it a go.

I don't know. This last week we had a big issue. We got blocked in certain countries. It's on the WWE YouTube channel. Oh, well then maybe you shouldn't actually. Because you'll get claimed pretty hardcore. This is definitely worth watching. Just as he said it. Here's a really blurry version

on Tress Peters YouTube channel. It's got 1.4 million views and nobody has seemed to have a problem with this yet. We'll be blocked in another country or something, right? Yeah. That's the challenge. I don't know. Everybody from Canada was like,

hey, what the fuck, man? I'm just trying to watch the show. Yeah, turn your VPN on, you losers. Shock. Mash. Amazon has detection for that VPN stuff now. I was in Canada recently, and I wanted to watch the Game of Thrones episode

on my Amazon Prime, and apparently it's not available on the Canadian stuff there. So I hop on my VPN, and they're like, hey, by the way, we see you using a VPN. Fuck off.

I was like, oh. Wow. Damn, that sucks. Don't we have a VPN sponsor Fuck off. I was like, oh. Damn, that sucks. Don't we have a VPN sponsor? We do. ExpressVPN, maybe? Yes, use them. Get ExpressVPN to watch things you're not legally allowed to watch.

Because of your country. When you say it like that, it makes me want to buy it more. That's what it is. It's so that people don't trace you and follow and get up all in your business yeah but apparently this guy this guy the shock master after he made a total ass of himself tripping over that he went from being the new tough guy of wwe to being the guy that always loses like just a fucking loser just a

dope tripping around so that was that was the most career defining trip of that man's life his costume is so stupid it's literally a stormtrooper helmet covered and like bedazzled but it's so bedazzled he can't see and that's why he tripped he's just coming out blind all shiny and sparkly like was he ever gonna take it off like there's no way you could wrestle in that and he is very overweight and his health has when he comes barreling through i forgot his helmet falls off he's gotta scoop it up oh what a dick and the best part is they have pyrotechnics

when he bursts through the wall. And he's got to scoop the helmet up and like, oh, the shock master here. It's not even his voice. It's some other guy talking through a megaphone. Is it? Or not megaphone, through the surround sound.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wrestling is great. I don't know why? Or not megaphone, through the surround sound. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wrestling is great. I don't know why you're not into it, Taylor. I don't like the actual wrestling. It's not that I'm not into it, I've just never watched it in my life. You need to watch some YouTube highlight videos of just them talking shit,

because it's acting, essentially. Like The Rock, Ric Flair, Hulk Hogan. No, I've watched the clip of where Hulk Hogan forgets his lines. He's like, do you actually believe that do you Vince, do you really

do you believe that I forgot my lines. I'll tell you once again, Vince, if you really if you're dumb enough to think that I would that you That's not the stuff I like i like it when they genuinely turn a crowd

around right like i forget who i don't follow wrestling that closely i don't pretend to but there's one guy he got cancer he actually beat it i think he's back and but everyone hated him because he was getting this push when he didn't deserve it and and he comes out, they're all chanting negative things towards him. And he has this look on his face like, wait till you see what I do. And he talks about how he has cancer, how he's gonna stop, he's gonna take a break, it's the fight of his life.

Oh my God, the entire arena turns around and starts cheering him. I like watching, there's a talent to changing 60,000 minds. I like it when The Rock goes out there and just decimates the other guy in popularity. He might play a song, do a parody, whatever he needs to do, and I'm impressed.

It's hard to work a crowd like that, and I'm seeing a kind of genius in action. Yeah. Yeah. I don't like the cancer guy, but I like the ones I mentioned rick flair is probably my favorite rick flair is fucking hilarious uh you know the espn uh movie like documentary about rick flair is great it's probably the second best one they've ever done 30 for 30 those are all really good series but it's more like it's an hour long so 30 for 30 didn't seem

to apply i was gonna say that but it seems like it's like an hour long. So 30 for 30 didn't seem to apply. I was going to say that, but it seems like it's like an hour, you know, and, and 30 for 60. Yeah. 30 for 60. And, uh,

it's real good. Like showing your Ric Flair's career. And, uh, the interesting thing about him is everybody else has a persona, you know, Hulk Hogan is Terry Hogan in real life. And he lives a fairly normal life.

You know, he doesn't beat people up or anything. He doesn't, he doesn't talk like this brother. this brother i mean he kind of does but not that ridiculous well he doesn't talk about his he doesn't talk about his pythons a lot do you remember remember when he went on that uh fuck i don't remember the guy he played in like a fucking csi or some shit but he went on to the uh talk show that this guy hosted a long time ago like one of those like live shows or whatever and this guy you know what I'm talking about, right? He's the guy from Law & Order.

Yeah, yeah, that's it. But this guy basically talked a lot of shit about wrestlers in the past, about how it's all fake, blah, blah, blah, or something, I guess, and Terry, or Hulk Hogan, goes to demonstrate a sleeper hold or whatever. So... We can watch this clip. Yeah, I guess. So if you don't know, there's two ways to

choke someone out. One is they literally can't breathe and this takes can take a long time minutes right but the other one if you cut off blood flow to a person's head they can be passed out in literally six seconds like no joke like six seconds somebody can be passed out um and so he demonstrates the sleeper hold on him and in like i want to say he literally held him i think if you count it was like six seconds and then he lets go of him the guy drops and he like fucking busts the back of his head up there's blood on the floor i think he ended up suing him for it but people i the rumors or i guess what was being said afterwards is that um terry knew what he was doing and he just did it to because he wanted to fuck the guy up because he made fun of his

resolution so when you say so i'm just taking issue when you say he doesn't beat people hey i don't know if that's totally true this day he did did let's watch this. This is Hulk Hogan Choking out Richard Belzer and mr. T is happy. This is the CSI guy It's the law and order guy. Yeah. Yeah, yeah ready set play We all started 30 seconds, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah We all started at 30 seconds, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, he's out.

He's out now. He's out. Bam! He dropped him a little carelessly. The head did the flippy flop thing. He's sleeping. He dropped him like a sack of potatoes. He's sleeping. He has a head injury.

Yes, it's bad. There's a lot of blood. Dude, there's a lot of blood on that. It's hard to see. Yeah, you can see the blood. Yeah, you can, yeah. Oh, he just turned around. You can see all the blood running down his collar. Dude, he should have sued him for that.

Yeah. I mean, but that's also very funny. Wait, look. What is it? Are you still playing it? Oh, he's showing the stitches. Where are you? Oh, I see.

Minute 28. See, if something is very, very funny, you shouldn't be able to get sued for it. Yeah. If I were king, that would be the rule so rick flair however his persona is he is this rich guy who fucks a ton of women who wears gaudy jewelry who's who throws money around buys everybody drinks he he's got a he's got his own limousine he's got his own private jet this is his persona and you're like probably a family man who lives a small life

No, he is literally a man who owns his own private jet his own limousine fucks thousands and thousands of women where's there's this great story where he's got like this $20,000 Rolex and And he wakes up the next morning in bed with these women and he's like, where's my Rolex at? Where's my rolly and they're like you don't remember he's like no what well last night you took it off and it fell in the spaghetti bowl and everybody laughed and you said fuck it i got eight of them and you left he just threw the toy just threw it away and just story like after story like that of all the women and all the money that he would spend

it's crazy like like the life that he lived him talking to the sports psychologist about how much he drank and they're like i'm gonna butcher the numbers but but she was like do you drink he's like yes yes i do how much do you drink um that five beers eight mixed drinks a day every day yeah every day and how long have you been doing that? 27 years? 13 a day. You know, something like that. And he's like, you're telling me that you have 15 drinks a day every day for the last 25 years.

Yeah, yeah, pretty much. She's like, and he's like, that's impossible. He's just like, that's Ric Flair. And you got to think, like, he was drinking that much alcohol, but still looking that good. Like, incredible, like, physique. Like, of course, steroids probably. But still, regardless. And he was famous.

I wonder how much, like, how hard it is to be super fit on that kind of steroids. Who knows? But he was one of the guys who would cut it. Bleeding is important in the ring to sell that things are going on. He was really good at selling. And they talk about this in the documentary. If you hit Ric Flair, he screams. If you choke him, he's like really animated.

And he would sell really well for the other fighter and make them look good, and he would also cut himself all the time. And a lot of the fighters from this era did that. They'd have a little razor blade, and they'd cut themselves up in their hairline, like just inside the hairline or just below it, and he has so many scars up there now, and so does Dusty Rhodes. If you Google Dusty Rhodes and look at him, so many scars, so much. It's like scarification at this point. It's cut, overcut, overcut,

overcut right up there where his hairline used to be. It's, it's, it was rough. And you bleed a lot from a cut like that. You know, you just, you just poke the corner of the razor blade in essentially, and you make a, it's going to heal in a day or two, but it looks bad. Great documentary on Ric Flair. And then I always say it, but if you're going to watch that, you might as well watch the one about Bo Jackson called Bo Knows. They didn't cut... I'm looking at some of these scars. It's his whole forehead

that's cut up. Yeah, they got carried away sometimes. The way you described it, it made it seem like these guys would just... Poke themselves. Like a little bit under the the way you described it, it made it seem like these guys would just... Poke themselves. Like a little bit under the hair where you can't see it. No, man. These guys' foreheads are wrecked.

Yeah. Yeah. In a lot of instances, it's years and years of doing it. They do a bunch of shows a month, and so they're cutting themselves continuously, and it's never really healing right. Yeah. Wow. Yeah.

Wow. So, and then like later on, it got more extreme where they got like tax, like in the, in the ring and they're getting slammed on the tax. They're hitting each other with those big, we watched that.

That was hardcore. They're slapping each other with fluorescent light bulbs, which makes really nasty cuts all over you. And, uh, the barbed wire, you know, there's throwing each other into barbed wire and stuff like that.

That's, that's rough to watch. I don't care for that at at all do they not do that anymore they do do that just not so much and like there's lots of different organizations you can and the minor organizations are the remember remember that it's always i'm only interested in bum fights it's the only wwe style thing i'll believe remember it's always sunny when they have the they have the wrestler, and they're like, you know, we thought you'd come in and do some figure fours. The maniac. And come off the ropes. And he's like, no, no, that don't sell no more.

You gotta be extreme. See, the people like blood, you know? They like Sigour. They're like, is that just a whole bucket of walnuts? Is that a bucket of chestnuts? Is he foraging for his food? It's like, I didn't want to say it earlier, Mac,

but every time you walk away, he's calling you the N-word. What? Why is he saying it? No, he's just saying, and this, and that. He's just saying it. He's just calling you that. It's like, what is... That's one of the funniest episodes.

I love that. It's called the gang wrestles for the troops. It's great. They come out as the birdmen. We're supposed to be the war birds and it's really coming out off like we're just bird man hybrids the birds of war that is do you watch that show steven it's always sunny or is i've seen a lot of clips from it there there are two shows that i watch too many clips from it's always sunny in philadelphia

and um fucking uh curb your enthusiasm and i actually feel bad that i haven't watched these shows because everything i see from them looks really good i'm gonna get on it man that shows and you've got like 11 seasons of sunny and only in the last like couple seasons has it kind of not been as good like they were they were so good for so i would even skip season one because danny devito wasn't a part of it in season one. So just start right at two when he jumps in because he took that show from funny to hysterical. And Curb is very good, you know, with Larry David. And he has lots of really good guest stars. They do like a Seinfeld reunion one episode where you get the full Seinfeld cast.

And the premise of the Curb Your Enthusiasm episode is we're going to do a finale episode, like a reunion episode. And so they literally do it. And so you get to see it on Curb if you're a Seinfeld fan. It's like the episode you never got. Jason Alexander's on there a lot. Julie Louis-Dreyfus.

What's his name? Kramer isn't on there very much. But they make a joke about the N word thing in that episode. It's, it's really good. It's like Larry's black friend is going to talk to him and it's, it's very convoluted, very complicated to go into the plot device,

but Larry sends his black friend friend to go talk to what's his name? Something Richard, Michael Richards, Michael Richards. He sends his black friend to go talk to Michael what's his name? Something Richard Michael Richards? Michael Richards. He sends his black friend to go talk to Michael Richards and convince Michael Richards that this disease that he has isn't so bad. Ridiculous

premise, of course. But he knocks on the door and he's dressed as a black Muslim for some reason, even though he's not. He's got the little cap and everything. And when he answers the door, he's like, oh, please no, please no. It was a mistake. I was in a bad place. He's like, no, man, no, no, no. I'm Larry's friend.

Oh, oh, thank God. I'm sorry. I made a mistake. I was in a bad place. Yeah, Curb's great. What's your go-to show, Stephen, that you just, you can't get enough of? Man, it sucks. But, like, I'm so busy.

TV is, like, one of those few things that, like, you can't shortcut it. So man it sucks but like i'm so busy tv is like one of those few things that like you can't shortcut it so it's really hard for me to do it like for me to sit down and watch a show it's man it's i don't know if it's because of everything i did on the internet but i'm like i'm like if i'm not if i'm not streaming i'm like doing emails and discord and then i'm like following up with business stuff and i'm like planning out like debates or talking to people or i'm you know managing like social media or my YouTube stuff or like, there's like so much stuff to do always that to actually like sit down and watch something for 30 minutes is like a huge commitment.

And I just haven't been able to do it even for an hour. The most recent thing I finished was like game of Thrones. And then, yeah. And that was disappointing as shit. We don't need to do that. We don't need to go over that again. But if you,

if you're looking for something new, that's like a mini series where you won't be soaked up in a ton of time, Chernobyl is so good. It's chilling because you know something like this has happened. It did happen, yeah. It's one of the best shows on television. I think it is probably right now. It's the best thing I'm certainly watching.

It's incredible. It's over, right? No, no, no. It's amazing acting, really good effects, great story uh all all around just really really good show uh very good very good uh have you heard there's another show that i keep getting recommended now recently is it called billionaire am i making this up or oh i've heard of that show oh billions yeah yeah billions i've seen an episode or two and it seemed good it's got a it's got Dick Winter from Band of Brothers as the star character.

I like him. Yeah. Yeah, he was also in that Stephen King adaptation, Dreamcatcher with Morgan Freeman. And that is a really good movie. I can't think who played the retarded kid, but I was really surprised that it was him playing it. You ever seen Dreamcatcher?

Was it a retarded kid playing the retarded kid or no no um then that's just good acting to be fair he went full retard and it still worked um it's uh dream catcher is really interesting uh i read the book and the book is even better uh it's i won't go to essentially got four friends and they're and and uh they sort of share this connection uh where they they're sort of psycho psychically connected but they don't really talk about it it's not really a main like plot device or anything and they go out into this winter cabin for this like yearly retreat that they've always gone into and some crazy shit happens where things just go awry and there are deaths and there is blood and there is gore and you really don't know what's going on. And then Morgan Freeman fucking shows up with this big like government conspiracy and they're in the snow and people are not the

people they believe. And one guy's inside his head and his like mental warehouse, but he's actually in a mental warehouse, like running around trying to keep the thing that's possessing him from getting a hold of the memory that the guy wants to get that's in his own head. He's like locking it in a door in his mental warehouse, which is a place in his head that doesn't really exist. It's crazy. There's monster leeches that come out of the toilet and go in your asshole. It's it's great. Dream.

Yeah, that sounds great. It's not. It's not great. Let's let's let's be honest here. But as far as Stephen King adaptations, they can be really good, like The Shining, or they can be really fucking weird and not so great. And this is somewhere in the middle. I like it. Speaking of asses, I need a brief ass break.

Aww. You need one of those donut cushions. Let me slip in an ad here since Taylor's taking an ass break. Ha ha ha! You have a suppository sponsor or something? Close enough. Let's talk about sex. Good sex.

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Check them out. Yeah. It's cool. Is the Blues playing tonight? No, tonight is NBA night. I have a... I have plans. Should the Blues go another game?

I know it's tied up right now, but should the Blues lose this thing? There are plans in the works, and I'm just going to leave it at that. Can you tell? Well, no, because then one of the fans will be like, Taylor, guess what they're going to do to you? I had the brilliant idea you could put it in the chat. No, because Taylor will see that Well I could just PM you I guess

You could but I don't know that I can change it during the show I just display the PM or something It's not a good idea I could probably text you It's probably great show content But at some point I'll get you the information We can continue on with the podcast But yeah I'll tell you what we're going to do

It's mean spirited So the Blues won a game. They are 1-13. Wait, I want to know what mean-spirited joke is going to be played. Not on you. What were you so paranoid for? Jeez, Taylor. Oh, it sounded like that.

Well, maybe if you didn't take five-minute asshole breaks, you would be tuned in. It's not the hole. The hole is part and parcel of it it's the the cheek is like it's i can't express enough i wish you could show it i mean actively sore can you not just like pull your waistband down a little and demonstrate the blackness of your bruise put on some shorts and pull it up that seems no it's i would have to get the whole picture, I'd have to show way too much ass. Can you do a handstand? Probably not now. If I worked at it.

Against the wall. Anyway, yes, the Blues, the St. Louis Blues, have won the first ever game in the Stanley Cup Finals after losing 13 consecutive games. So there we fucking go. I was so fucking stoked watching them win like i had already like resolved myself at the beginning of the series versus the bruins where i was like you're a blues fan the blues always fucking fail they've never won they will never

win we're going to get swept and it's going to be humiliating and so just the blues winning this one and looking like they're really fucking in this and they're just as good a team as boston if not a you know they've got an edge in a couple areas but boston does too like it i was just i was so stoked like it was so cool i was at a bar with some people last night watching it and just like when we won in overtime was like every just a elation just everywhere like the whole city is riled up about it i'm so so excited like it the all of downtown is packed on game nights even though the last two games have been in Boston. People are selling out the arena just to watch on the Jumbotron.

It's really neat, so I'm excited. I share a lot of your stoke. I tuned in during the second period, so I saw the second, third, and then, of course, the overtime. I don't know why I watch the Blues with this idea that it's, it's children playing with adults and they don't have a shot at this. And every time something goes their way, it's like, you know, this is a professional hockey team also. Like, they can play with the Bruins. And then, you know, it was scoreless for a long time.

And even though I looked later after the game and saw the Blues were ahead in almost every statistical category, hits and shots on goal and stuff, I still watched it through this lens that made me think they were just hanging on. They were lucky to be in it. And I'm just not seeing what is actually happening. And when they won in overtime, I was like, what? Like, they're going to stop it this this counts for real for real like wow i was like ha ha st louis is allowed to win at least one game i somehow i know the history of the st louis blues destiny they came into the league in 1967 they made the cup finals three

straight years up till 1970. They got swept every single time. Oh, and four, and they haven't made it again in 50 years. And they just now made it again. And so it's just a, there's a really popular YouTube video called the St.

Louis blues, a legacy of failure. And it's a guy who like analyzes all the different teams. And we didn't, he did not pull any punches on how fucking bad the blues have been. But for them to be here now, my dad paid $800 to go see him in Boston because he was so stoked.

He's like, I've never seen him get this far. I'm so excited. And I just looked up the average ticket cost in St. Louis for Game 3. $1,370. I didn't realize Missouri was such a big hockey town. I didn't know. Yeah, we don't have a basketball team, so everybody loves hockey. When they won, I thought

they would somehow still lose. Like, oh, yeah, well, if the Blues score, they'll probably just do a 20-minute overtime. Yeah. That's not how it's supposed to go. I don't know. I just couldn't fathom that they could be better.

Oh, and I was telling Taylor during PKN that my perception of who's better really changed goal to goal. The Blues were up 2-0, and I'm like, yeah, we're going to crush them. And then they're up 2-1. The Bruins get one goal, and I'm like, ah, screw it. We don't have any chance in this series that you know like that one goal ends all of it and then they get a second and a third and four unanswered goals and I was like god ruined it we can't do it and in game two I don't know I'm just

total pessimist on this even though I'm rooting for them to win and and when they won now like not only did they win a game they stole home ice i'm i'm still doing this every goal thing i guess because now they scored the most recent goal and i'm like ah they're world beaters you can't hang with them if people don't know what stealing home ice is it's two games away two games at home away home away so it went from a best of seven series where there were four away games scratch theatch the first two because they split it. Now it's a best of five series where there's three home games. They have home ice advantage now.

They stole it by winning one. And it's, dude, who says the Blues can't get a cup? Dude, I would be so excited. Me, as soon as the Bruins score one. If they did. I even have said in the past, I'm like, yeah, I don't have any tattoos. I'm not a tattoo god. But if the Blues win a cup, Iins score one. I even like have said in like the past, I'm like, yeah, I don't have any tattoos. I'm not a tattoo guy,

but the blues win a couple, get one. And I'm now realizing the only reason I said that is because I thought there was never a possibility of it because there is a 0% chance I'm getting a tattoo. You should get a blue freckle to commemorate 2019. A blue tear for when we lost. No, no,

no, not a tear. It's a lot. You can just put a freckle on your ass next to the bruise and be like, you see this? This freckle is when the Blues won the Cup.

It's so much fun. It's the only sport I follow religiously, hockey, because I played it my whole life growing up. It's just so much fun to watch. Even when the Blues

get knocked out, I still watch the rest of the playoffs. I pick a team that I enjoy. Usually, I root for the team that beats us because then at least I can feel like, all right, well, the Blackhawks knocked us out again, the playoffs like i i pick a team that i enjoyed usually i root for the team that beats us because then at least i can feel like all right well the blackhawks knocked us out again but chicago won

the cup which means they're the best team in the league so we got knocked out by the best yeah i would do this is like highly unrelated i'm just trying to interject right again i don't do the same shit in like fucking tournaments and you play games where like fuck you it's like uh you're like in the round of 128 and somebody beats is like okay whatever and they're like okay well let's follow that guy and then he makes it to the round of 32 and then he gets beaten by the like champions and i was like well in a way i kind of maybe could have been third place because beat the guys that beat me so i mean you know it's like doing i'm doing that so so i follow the 76ers a little bit i'm new to to basketball. I pretend to be some old school. But anyway, they lost in Game 7 of the Eastern Conference Finals,

and it was a buzzer beater that bounced on the rim four times. I'm not saying the Sixers should have won or anything like that. I'm just trying to articulate how close that series is. Game 7, buzzer beater, bounces on the rim four times. Well, then, I guess it wasn't the conference final, second round. Then the team that beat them, the Raptors, they end up beating the next team in six games. Huh?

Well, if they beat them in six games and they beat the Sixers in seven games, clearly the Sixers were better. They would have beaten the Bucs too. That's just math. Yeah, duh. Right, right? Now, if the Raptors beat the Golden State Warriors somehow,

then that proves the Sixers were the second best team in basketball this year. Math. There you go. Sports fans have been doing Bernie math way before the 2015 election. This is the first year that I truly believe the St. Louis Blues have a chance at the Cup.

Before this, I would have said, no chance. They need to redistribute the talent. Make it more fair. That's pretty good. That's the only arena that I think socialism should be really thrown in. Baseball is such bullshit. I don't understand. You really have to have a look at the game.

It's nonsense, dude. I love baseball. I really do. I played a lot of baseball is such bullshit. I don't understand. Like, you really have to have a lot of games. It's nonsense, dude. Like, I love baseball. I really do. I played a lot of baseball as a kid. I like listening to it on the radio. Maybe it's just my announcers, you know? I like my local Atlanta Braves announcers. I've only been to a couple of Braves games,

but I really enjoyed it. You know, you're in the hot sun, but fuck, I enjoyed it. I really liked seeing how big those guys are. I was pretty close to home plate so i you got you were almost on like head level with them i guess i was really and you could you could see that holy shit that dude's 64240 that dude is built like a fucking brick shithouse he's incredibly powerful look how he holds that bad it's like it it's like me

holding one of those like hollow yeah like like it's just like a novelty bat yeah it seems so light in his hands that you know he could just he can just flick it you know with incredible speed uh and uh i i really love baseball but my issue is it's just not fair there's no cap in baseball there's no cap and and like the bigger markets are just going to win most of the time. Now, there's plenty of examples of small market teams pulling out a series. The Arizona Diamondbacks won that year. The Tampa Bay won that year. It happens occasionally.

It does. And if you're a fan of those teams, you're like, ah, is this the beginning of a dynasty? Well, you're fucking stupid because what's going to happen next year is all of a sudden the Red Sox, the fucking A's, the Angels, well, not the Angels so much, the Yankees of the world are going to be like,

man, that's a great pitching staff you have. Be ashamed if somebody bought it. It's going to steal your players away and give them more money than they're going to pay double what you have to pay if they have to. Now, I love what's going on in football. Pitchers worth more in those markets, so they can pay more. Certainly.

And I love what's going on in football with New England, frankly. There's a lot of New England haters. People will go and play in New England for less money because they believe in that system. They want to play for Bill Belichick. They want to play with Tom Brady. They want to win a fucking ring. If you've been in the league for eight years and you've already made $80 million or whatever,

but you really want to win a championship, you're going to have to get the fuck out of Buffalo. Yeah. I mean, New England wins one every other year. At least one won every other year for the past two years. Yeah. Get a contract with New England wins one every other year. At least one won every other year for the past two years. Yeah, get a contract with New England and you're like 50-50. Let's just make a two-year contract. That way I'm guaranteed a ring. This is why you should jump ship and start watching hockey.

It's the only of the four major sports that has a hard salary cap. It doesn't matter if you're New York or fucking Carolina. You cannot spend more than the cap. But they don't all spend salary cap. Doesn't matter if you're New York or fucking Carolina. You cannot spend more than the cap. But they don't all spend the cap. If they would stop skating, lose the ice, and get rid of those silly sticks, I'd be down. What would the sport be?

Them kicking the puck, slipping around? It'd be soccer. You'd lose the ice as well. It's just guys padded up playing soccer. Now it's full combat like arena with uh with handball and included but lacrosse yeah it's no they use their hands to throw the ball and sometimes they hock it at each other that's that's a power that's why it's called hockey

yeah yeah thank you uh i'd watch that sport if they were just handballing the fucking croquet ball. A real heavy fucking... Those are hard. Yeah, they are. There'd be deaths. But all of the retired UFC stars, that's where they'd go. And give all the teams scary fucking

names like the Tampa Bay Crushers and stuff like that. The Seattle Rapists. They always lose to the New York Rortorers. We're going up. All right, boys, get ready. We're taking on the Rapists tonight. And here's the cheer squad for the Seattle Rapists.

Man, do they look scared. As you know, Jim, the Seattle Rapists are entirely composed of ex-convicts, and they don't accept anything below kidnapping. That's right. That's right. We'll see how they do against the Michigan vehicular manslaughterers. They're all like 40-year-old white guys who just had one too many drinks, and now their lives are ruined.

I don't feel like it's the rapists at all. No, not at all. I just wanted to go to jail. I didn't want to get conscripted into this prison. The worst team in the league is like the Raleigh Possessions. The Raleigh Loiterers. That's better, yeah. Loiterers, once again, showing a lazy defensive effort.

Here come the Jacksonville Jaywalkers. Jim, they haven't won a game yet this year. Their starting player, Bill Myers, he's limping out onto the field to play. Oh, and he's being raped. He's being raped. Well, that's what happens when you play Seattle at home. They really like to push the issue.

And that's two points for double penetration. Man, this would be a cool sports league. You'd make teams based on their crimes. The goalies get those highlight things that you can throw the croquet ball at like 95 miles per hour. I bet they could throw

a puck. It's a disc. No pucks. It's a ball, Woody. It's a ball. It's the size of a baseball, but it's made disc yeah no pucks no pucks it's a ball woody it's a ball okay okay all right ball it's the size of a baseball but it's made of granite by the end of the game it's just like ball shrapnel we have destiny destiny i have a politics question for you yeah about nhl or uh no but the nhl you're nancy pelosi right i muller has put forward his thing he's made a decent case for like 10 counts of obstruction and whatever do you impeach and that knowing that he's the senate's gonna like declare him innocent and

he runs with that do you keep him in limbo do you what do you do um this is so like when it comes to all of this for like i don't think about like the moral whatever any of that shit i just try to think of like what the most politically effective strategy would be um my feeling on this and i haven't read i haven't kept up on the polls recently with as much with trump i'm just trying to get caught up on like the democratic candidates um but like i it feels to me like it probably wouldn't play good to harp on the Russia stuff for the next, you know, however many months we have until we start picking up the election season. It feels like not a good issue to keep trumping up. I kind of feel like they should focus on the election moving forward and just move on from that. But I could be totally wrong.

Maybe it's something that plays well with polling stuff to threaten impeachment over and over again. I'm not sure. I mean, the Republicans did it with Hillary's email shit. I mean, they still bring it up. So Benghazi and yeah again i'm not sure i mean the republicans did it with hillary's email shit and i mean they still bring it up so i'm like i'm pretty like i just switch on this but like i i don't think he's gonna win in 2020 like for a while i did now i'm pretty convinced he's losing you want to jump on my bet what is your bet again i think i got 100 bucks with buddy oh that he will win. I don't remember the specifics. I know the specifics.

Yeah, it was a demo primary thing. The only way he doesn't win is if Bernie gets publicly fucked again and all of his supporters are like, screw you, I'm staying home. Yeah, Donald Trump's your president for another four. I'll bet with you. I'd do $100. Whatever you want to do, $10, $20, $30, $'d do 100 or whatever you want to do. 10, 20, 30, 40, 5, whatever.

What do you think, Steve? I think I would. I'll jump in with Woody if you want. I'd take that bet. I'd say $100. I don't think Trump wins again. I don't think so. I don't think he did enough for his base.

Like, he failed to deliver on so much. Like, the wall never really came together like we wanted it to. I mean, I guess the economy is doing okay. Although like the major problems really haven't been fixed, like the markets are doing okay. But I don't think the average American feels it as much. We didn't really do anything that we wanted to related to like trade. I mean, like we've got a lot of agriculture is being hurt in certain areas, even my home state was reporting huge losses because of tariff related stuff. Yeah, I don't know. It just doesn't feel like it doesn't feel like he got enough like effective political stuff done. And it did he didn't get enough like rhetorical political

stuff done like Hillary's not in prison and the wall didn't get built. So you know, everything was North Korea fell apart. ISIS was dead way before Trump came into office. I mean, I guess you can try to claim that if he wants to, but Trump didn't have fuck all to do with ISIS. You know, I fucked ISIS up. Ask anyone. Yeah. If you can find them, they're in pieces. I feel like destiny is way too fact-based for the next election cycle that's my opinion like for example the economy right vote on emotions more than yeah i agree i'm not trying to be fact-based but i'm saying like where's the wall like that was like his big thing like that was the thing that he had to get done because that's

a few hundred miles of it done though no i know he claims that it's refurbishing existing fences and he's like look at this it's the best wall ever and it's like yeah that this is already there that kind of exemplifies hundreds of miles thousand miles i don't know like a lot of wall existed before he got there and they're not letting him build any new wall and i don't even know the democrats are like morally right on this maybe there is some i don't think we need a wall that goes from c to c but there's probably some areas where a wall would be an effective thing to have and be helpful i already said build it out of solar panels and everyone's on board so but anyway uh the facts don't really matter

right like i i have a paraphrase and he's like look they're building the wall right there i'm so happy now they're refurbishing wall but he's seeing it with his own eyes and telling everyone that they're wrong does Does facts even count? You know, like I think it I think it does, because like this is what this is what this is what always happens with populism is you get somebody that comes in and they say the establishment sucks. I'm going to come in and I'm going to do things different. Everybody is like fucking super hype. That's Bernie's populist. People are super hype.

They're super energized. They're ready for it. And then he comes in and just four years of the same shit. And that's really what it was under Trump. i don't think anybody counterpoint things hitler well yeah he got stuff done he made changes there were no empty promises in mind the man said what he meant and he meant what he said well true that is certainly a strong point that is true he was a populist american institutions i think are popular or i'm sorry american institutions don't think that uh trump can actually become a fascist so i don't think

we have to worry about that but um yeah i don't know i think like oh especially and then there have been stories that have just hurt him and i'm only looking emotional i agree with witty i don't try to look at like the fact base but i think the wall thing is going to hurt him i think like oh especially and then there have been stories that have just hurt him and i'm only looking emotional i agree with witty i don't try to look at like the fact base but i think the wall thing is going to hurt him i think that immigration shit actually in the polls hurt him as well like the whole children on the border shit and you know that hurt him because he was real strong about not giving a fuck like day one and i think like day two he was like okay hold on wait a second executive order i'm sorry we're doing i'm doing this shit you know um yeah i don't know i just feel like yeah it hurt him, but that was his first year.

That won't matter for re-election, I think. Trump vote. He likes it kind of thing. Some do. So, Kyle, I've thought of that as well, right? There are a lot of Trump guys who are like, you know what? Why don't these cages have any barbed wire whatsoever, right?

There are Trump voters with that mindset. I ain't electrified. Yeah, yeah. But I think, you know, when you're trying to get more than half of the votes, then you're... Well, we proved last time you don't need more than half. Dude, the way he's also pissing people off is like,

he was supposed to be like, we're getting out of these wars. These wars are awful, so bad. Ask anyone. We've lost so many lives, so much money. And then he was like, we're getting out of Syria. And then like three days later, he like well maybe not it's like and now he's like he's like shit talking venezuela he's trying like people want to start shit with iran it's like oh

my god dude please get us out of this i i agree with you but i think a lot of people don't have that as one of their top issues i think a lot of people are we have war whatever you know they tell us we should do it obviously they're right they know more than me i think anti-war is like really big for a lot of people i don't think so i think the things that'll play when you start looking at the rust belt these places like you know michigan that haven't gotten like their mentoring jobs back these blue collar workers these are the ones that like you know started to swing for trump that really threw a lot of these states were like wait what the fuck how is this happening you know i i think those people. I don't think they've seen the boost in wages.

Or the coming back of manufacturers. That they hope to. I'm not saying they're going to turn. But they just aren't going to be as excited to vote. I think you're too truth based. I think all Trump has to do is get behind the podium. And say promises made. Promises kept.

I brought the manufacturing jobs back. I closed the wage gap. I did this. I did that. And they'll cheer and they'll vote. But those people in Michigan and Pennsylvania. Will know I didn't get my job back. And I heard wage gap. I did this. I did that. And they'll cheer and they'll vote. But those people in Michigan and Pennsylvania will know I didn't get my job back and I heard this four years ago.

Yeah, people in Florida will cheer. People in the Rust Belt will be like, huh, no. I don't think you can lie to them. This election is going to be what it's always about. It's going to be about guns. It's going to be about abortion. And it's going to be about keeping you safe in your home in America. And there's no... The conservatives are going to be very motivated by Trump's stance on all three of those issues.

And I think that the Democrats are going to be pulled so far to the left by a bit of their base that they're not going to be able to put up a comprehensible defense against Trump's strong stances on those issues. I think that this next election is going to determine Roe versus Wade. I think that if it goes to the Supreme Court soon, and it probably will, that we'll still keep Roe versus Wade. But there are some old ass justices on there. And if you give Trump four more years, he'll get another one. And that will push Roe versus Wade into the mythos of our- I think the last election determined Roe versus Wade, and it's fucked. There's something like 21 states now are trying to push

pro-life. Yes, but they're pushing that so that it'll go back to the Supreme Court, and then the decision will be made. And I think right now it will stay. That's my guess. No one knows. I'm guessing the other way, yeah. I'm guessing they win 5-4. And if it happens certainly before 2020 and

it very well may that's going to be a really strong stance it's gonna be like hey i give me another justice give me keep me in there four more years and for generations to come you're you're you're gonna get what you want and and that's gonna motivate a lot of people and uh i most people are pro-choice pro-choice has more votes but i think that the people who are pro-life are more reliable voters pro-choice has more people pro-choice does does not have more votes that's what i'm saying too yeah democrats are going to be insanely motivated to vote this election cycle when you've got somebody like trump that you hate i'm assuming the democrats don't fuck up like like by nominating somebody like biden which they might um i i think

that as long as you have any decent candidate like there is so much hatred for trump like however much rhetoric you think trump has woody about like oh you know like well he can say that he did this and say that even if it's not true that's fine man how many democrats like legitimately think that trump like walked into the fucking kremlin and made a deal with putin like give me the election by murdering Hillary Clinton's staff. And I'll do like there are Democrats, I think some crazy shit about like, you know, stuff related to Russian hacking. These people are going to be insanely motivated to to run to the polls and vote.

And yeah, especially issues like abortion. I don't think these are like wedge issues. These are just issues that the Republican Party needs to drop. The support for Americans for like wovey Wade was that like 70% for the last polling data I saw, I don't think these are good issues for Republicans to run on anymore. And things like free education and free healthcare, and things like, you know, Medicaid for all this polls really well with Americans, you know, education related issues pull really well with Americans. Like these are things that Republicans just historically don't have good stances on that like most

Americans don't agree with. I who you said, like, I agree with you that Biden would be a terrible mistake for them to run, but our front runner of anyone, who do you? Who i agree with you that biden would be a terrible mistake for them to run but our front runner of anyone who do you who do you like steven um i've spent honestly i started to get interested and then i like major lost interest um when um when like 35 fucking candidates declared they were running but um the three that i'm kind of have been looking into a little bit are like bernie sanders elizabeth warren and kamala harris um warren and sanders i i like i haven't looked into harris as much but i don't know i'll spend more time over the next few weeks like really starting to get into i'd love any of those as far as the democrats are concerned i really like uh

tulsi gabard because she's taking a hard stance against war she wants us out of that she i don't know much i'm sure i disagree they're on a ton of stuff but like i like that she's like talking about you know they haven't said no matter who you pick it won't get out of it like the republicans and the democrats will be like i love abortion i hate abortion i love gay marriage i hate gay marriage i love war oh i love war it's just the until they sit Tulsi down and give her the talk. See, and that's what I think. Even if she got elected, Trump was bloviating all his campaign, like, we're getting out of these wars. They're awful.

And then what happens? Fucking nothing. A little. Like, he's reduced troop counts, right? Am I wrong on that? Absolutely. And he has not. reduce troop counts, right? Am I wrong on that?

Absolutely. And he has not... But it's not really reducing troop counts because it's just taking troops out than putting Blackwater-type mercenaries in that position. And so we're still there. We're still fucking shit up. That's better. That's better, though. No, it's not. I don't like it, though, Kyle. One, I think it has repercussions. You know, the same repercussions there would be

if there were troops. And two, the expense of it is another thing I don't like. Creating American jobs. You're against that yes if that's how we're creating it then yeah i'm sorry creating american jobs is literally the dumbest excuse to fund anything ever if i wanted to you like we could make any government wanted to fund american jobs if you throw money we could pay people to go and cut um you know grass with toenail clippers if we wanted to and then like it's american jobs yeah yeah. Yeah. What's that? I mean,

the military at this point is largely a jobs program. What was that? There's something from some Soviet Russia where they were like, they were explaining that like this job jobs, they're doing some huge construction site and they're like doing it with shovels. And the, you know, the,

the boss comes and he's like, why are you, why are we doing some shovels? Why don't we bring in three bulldozers? And they're like, cause this creates 300 jobs. And he's like, well, why not have them do it with spoons then yeah great three million thinking no yeah they're gonna come back with spoons and there'll be 2700 more of them yeah yeah i i

definitely i definitely agree with you there but but i think it's better to have black water in there than it is to have uh american troops in there um better not not not great but but better and uh and i think he i don't think he's been as hawkish as you're as you're saying because American troops in there. Better. Not great, but better. And I don't think he's been as hawkish as you're saying. Not necessarily hawkish, but he's not pulling out. I think what Taylor is saying is that he's hawkish.

And then there's the not attacking. So Hillary Clinton may very well have started wars with North Korea, Iran, and Venezuela at this point. I guarantee one of them. I guarantee one of them. You can't guarantee one of them. I guarantee one of them. You can't guarantee one of them. I can guarantee it. No, you can't.

Trump's entire position with North Korea has been a fucking disaster. It's been like watching a four-year-old try to make a decision. Also, arguably, Trump got us much closer to a nuclear-armed Iran than any other country. Cut us some slack. He has no permanent secretary of defense.

He has no UN. Not anything. No head of the UN. He has no permanent secretary of defense. He has no UN. Of anything. No head of the UN. He doesn't have that. Every eight weeks, there's a new guy subbing in. I like that. Like a good sports team. Wait, let's let Stephen get in. Tearing up that Iran deal undermined a lot of U.S. negotiating power overseas and arguably moved a pretty bad state, Iran, towards nuclear weapons closer than anything any Democrat would have done. And it was backwards. My big issue with tearing up the Iran deal, people don't know. and arguably moved a pretty bad state, Iran, towards nuclear weapons, like closer than anything any Democrat would have done.

And it was backwards. My big issue with tearing up the Iran deal, people don't know, I think my understanding of it goes something like this. Up front, we gave them all this money. And then they had to like drop their nuclear program and not advance some of their weapons stuff. So what Trump did is he's like, all right, we already gave them the money. Let's stop here. Like, wait a minute.

No. Like, we paid gave them the money, let's stop here. Like, wait a minute! No! Like, we paid for their compliance, and then you cut up the deal and they kept the cash. Bad. And to be fair, to be clear, that paying for their plan is unfreezing their money. We didn't actually pay the money. A lot of people seem to think that we

send them planes of cash, but it was actually on the wrong butt cheek. Are you okay? Taylor's broken up over this. I coughed. I'm sorry. You have a broken rib and I coughed. Pretty hard. I'm sorry. You have like a broken rib and you coughed. Did it hurt your ass to cough? No, my ribs hurt really bad too. Are you crying?

No, I just got like, I was hitting my jewel and it got caught in my throat. No, no, you're right. I'm so sad about us not pulling out of the Middle East. I thought it was a pain reaction to the broken rib. Indian tear. No, no. It's not a broken rib. thought it was a pain reaction to the broken rib. Indian tear. If it were a broken rib, yeah, I'd be crying.

That guy was not actually Native American. Don't let that propaganda fool you. I don't even know what I believe anymore. He was part Creole. He had a mixed lineage, but Native American wasn't part of it. Mexican? That's like half Amerindian.

That's close, right? No. I don't think Mexican counts as an ethnicity. I think Trump loses big. More of a nationality. I'm worried I'm in a bubble. I use the blue lens and red lens. I like to say it is in my meetings.

I think I might be looking at it through the wrong lens. know through a bias so i could be wrong yeah i think you win i just don't see him winning it's gonna be great well we're you don't yet but you just can't see two years into the future it depends yeah it's happening it's happening and i'm look look i'm not cheering for it i'm just saying it's coming like it's being trump from second yeah percentage of the time does the incumbent win for the president And look, I'm not cheering for it. I'm just saying it's coming. It's being Trump? Trump's second? What percentage of the time does the incumbent win for the president?

We looked this up once. It's pretty high, right? It's more than half. It's pretty high. Yeah, definitely way more than that. Look, it depends who runs against him. There are candidates who can beat Trump, of course. And I think what's really important in this election cycle is the vice president. Now, bear with me here.

this election cycle is the vice president now bear with me here i i think it's very important that if someone like sanders or um who's or uncle joe gets in there that they pick a young vibrant name is creepy joe show some respect in your creepy joe if creepy joe or crazy bernie get in there then it's very it's vital to their campaign that they pick one of these 35 year old attractive young ladies who's well-spoken strong spoken and can really be forceful on on on women's issues the palin approach it can't lose you disagree i want to get steven's perspective the way the what approach what did you say what the palin approach is what i call you're correct witty the idea that you needed to shoehorn a woman in there no matter what no don't you want a word mccain but there are strong female candidates you yourself chose elizabeth warren is one of your elizabeth warren is not a 35 year old

no she's not she has a pussy on i think i don't think that i think it doesn't matter that it's a woman it just it needs like a progressive candidate though the democrats fucked up last time by ignoring the entire progressive base when they picked hillary and hopefully they don't do it again when they choose by then you have to address that because it's a huge it needs to be someone young for sure it because you can't bernie bernie could do it septuagenarian or whatever the hell if they pick bernie i predict they that the democrats win handily they they bernie bernie unites the progressive base very handily and so does i think elizabeth like steve i don't think we've got to fix your mic man i i think that you're cutting out yeah

it's cutting out frequently so what you want to do you want to click the gear down in the bottom left and uh go to voice and video and then there's a bar down there called automatically determine input sensitivity and you want to drag that quite far to the left like almost all the way to the left and that's the one two it won't cut you off yeah it's not a volume issue it's that oh shit i see no never mind i understand let me know what happens again and i'll drag it more okay yeah we'll do no problem um i i just think like i like tulsi gabbard too i saw her in the joe rogan experience i thought she's very well spoken not that it has anything to do with her candidacy but she's pretty i enjoyed looking at her and I think that's important for a candidate.

Go back to Kennedy fucking destroying Nixon in that debate, right? In the whole makeup debacle and the whole thing. The way you look is important. The way you present yourself is important to some extent. That being said, our current president is like an orange Cheeto monster who's 70 pounds overweight. And people who watched Kennedy and Nixon debate on TV overwhelmingly thought Kennedy won people who only listened to it on the radio thought Nixon,

Nixon won and Nixon did win. Nixon was better on the, on the, on the issues of the day than Kennedy. And you people say he's just kind of hot and I'm an ugly goblin. He is. They literally look like different races, like not different races like different races.

Not different races, different species. Like if Tolkien was talking about that election cycle, fucking Kennedy would have been an elf and Nixon would have been a goblin man. The time of the Kennedys is over. The time of the Nixons is about to begin. Yeah, but I think it's important that if you pick one of these septuagenarians, 70 fucking years old plus, 74, I don't know.

Hey, Elizabeth Warren? She's only 69. Yeah, Elizabeth Warren is, I think that Trump does a very good job of mocking her, and it plays. I worry about that. I think, well, this is an optics thing, and I could be totally wrong but i feel like trump's like outbursts on twitter are not going to be like they're calling someone pocahontas over and over again i mean at some point like i just there's

something at the root of that insult right you know there's the fact that that that she went on and on about her native american heritage and then and then like the leader of the cherokee nation is like stop telling these lies we We don't appreciate it. And, you know, they did the DNA research and they found out that she's less Native American than I am. You know, I mean, you can say that, but I still don't think you get at anything. I mean, like I said, I could be wrong. I just I feel like Trump does a lot of things that makes him like when you talk about Trump calling her Pocahontas, all the Republicans that hate Elizabeth Warren are already going to hate. It's not like he's here, but it energizes the fuck out of democrats that hate him for it kyle has a thing and here's

why i think when he called little marco little marco it played when he because he is lying ted cruz it played when he says pocahontas like it it's working however if you can beat him and and pete budaj is the guy i keep looking at this, he's better. He called Pete Buttigieg Alpha E. Newman, the Mad Magazine guy or Crack Magazine guy, I don't know. And you know his reply? Did you guys hear it? It was fantastic. He goes, you know what?

I think we need to elevate the state of the debate. The state of the debate. We need to raise the level of our talking points. And I think there's more. There's more. Don't interrupt. He goes, and we need to elevate this.

And I've already done that by making Trump create a literary reference. But did you see Trump's reply? No. Fuck you. You're gay. That played well. Dude, it did.

That played well. Who did you have smashing him uh who did you have smashes him at every turn when they ask him if he's afraid he's like i'm not afraid of a guy who faked a disability to get out of war and it's like dude you went there he went there everybody's been going there for like four years though i don't think so no no one else yeah people gave him all the bone spur sanders couldn't say anything hillary couldn't say anything you know they never served in afghanistan you wanted to get over there and kill those innocent yellow men who did nothing to us fine if you would tell the truth i will tell a lie to save an innocent man i will every day trump went out there and i forget trump talked some trash on him he's like

this guy was getting ready for the seventh season of the apprentice when i was packing my bags for afghanistan and it's like dude these are effective wins these are not one that season of apprentice you lost your war so you know what you know it's like a lot of the wind out of trump sales and i know they're not going to do this because it's a ratings thing but trump in a debate that doesn't have a live audience would play so much worse for him yeah i think that yeah when trump is making like his little snide one, you know, his one liners and stuff, and like everybody's clapping, that's like so much. But could you imagine watching it? It's like, have you ever seen the videos where people give you a sitcom

with no like laugh track? Yeah. And there's like all those awkward pauses. And you're like, wait, what? It would look so weird for him to do that in an environment where there aren't people like clapping every time he talks. For sure. They need to come up with a funny insult for Trump. clapping every time he talks for sure they need to come up with a funny insult for trump they could call him fat trump obese trump like to be fair by this point in his presidency based on the rate of weight gain early on i thought he'd be much fatter by now but he seems to have tapered off right around pretty well well he wears those giant suits like the oversized suits to really hide it so yeah he he i want to see a before and after picture because he's definitely gained like 35 pounds at least probably has i mean no i'm

actually i'm six foot ten and i weigh a cool 200 i would say like i think we should take note at the end of term of term one and compare obama at the beginning of his term and at the end of term one, and compare Obama at the beginning of his term, and at the end of his first term, and Trump at the beginning and end. And I feel like Trump is, now maybe Trump has, because the orange and the hair, he just doesn't age, but Obama aged.

Obama aged quite a bit. And by the end, Obama, in eight years, Obama aged 15. Yeah, that's true. But that's pretty normal for a president. It's pretty normal for a president, unless you're Donald Trump. Yeah, but Obama also started off looking pretty good, young's true. But that's pretty normal for a president. It's pretty normal for a president, unless you're Donald Trump.

Obama also started off looking pretty good, young and pretty. He looked great. Obama looked better at the end of his term than Trump did at the beginning. Well, there were decades of time. Hey, hey, hey, I make the rules. How old is Obama? Like 58 or something?

He's probably in his 50s. Oh, Tulsi Gabbard. 57. There are like 23 Democratic candidates, and a lot of people poke fun at that, but there are 8 who are polling 2% or better. I just look at them. But it's going to crowd the stage. Tulsi Gabbard is not one of them. Yeah, she's really far down.

And she's got a lot of weird... If it was a beauty contest, she'd be top 2 for sure. What is she? She has weird stuff? Yeah, she's got a lot for sure what is she she has weird stuff destiny i'm not yeah she's getting a lot of heat where i think she i think i want to say she opposed bills not for same-sex marriage but for even same-sex civil unions like she was she's like a pretty bad track record with like lgbt stuff and with you know progressives are really loud today when she was extra young her father guided her towards these like, like, I want to say conversion therapy and get it wrong, but it was like some pretty anti-gay things from when she was young. And she's abandoned all those views.

She's done her apology tour, but it sticks. Is she gay? No, I don't think so. I have no idea. What do you mean a shame? Now you've got a shot, Kyle. Here's a quote from her. Homosexuality is not normal.

It's not healthy, morally and scripturally wrong, she said in a 1992 interview, in which she also blamed the spread of AIDS on the repeal of sodomy laws. Tulsi Gabbard's opposition to LGBTQ, and then there's like eight more letters, writes, as well as abortion, seemed to stem from this religious background. She's born in American Samoa.

I'm looking for more of her quotes. Tulsi is the cool girl of the world. See, that was 1992. She's 38 now. If that was 1992, she would have been 10 years old. 11. She would have been 11. I don't like the gate. I can only read what's written.

I know, but I'm just trying to put it in context. Why was she interviewed in 92? Because her father was somebody special. Okay. Like an organizer against gay people. She skipped all these. Well, she was anti-gay as a child, and I'm holding that against her. They're hammering her for an interview she gave as a child?

Eleven. Eleven's not a child. That is ridiculous. That is insane. Of course she believes whatever her father said. I'll tell you one thing. If I made the rules, Eleven would not be a child. That is insane. Of course she believes whatever her father said. If I made the rules, Eleven would not be a child. Then you better move to fucking Somalia or Thailand

or somewhere like that. I was going to say the U.S. South, but I mean... Well, he's already there. Already here. She's actually prettier. You kept talking about how hot she is. She's prettier than she was in my mind's eye. I'd rather fool around with her

than with Pete Buttigieg. I don't know. I bet Pete knows he's weighing around a cock. You've already changed my mind. He'd be like, Blue Chew, right? Right? Pete Buttigieg's presidential campaign

is brought to you by Blue Chew. Speaking of which, do we have anything we need to hear from Kyle? No, we don't. There's a post roll, of course. While you're massaging your butt. It's very sore. Rubbing your neck thickening salve.

My face reddening agent. I had to insert my deep earth crystal in there. How does it compare to this weekend? Does it hurt more or less? Are you healing? It's pretty similar. It's getting a little bit better. It was so fucking bad on Sunday.

I guess Monday was probably the worst like just getting in my car and like driving like i need my right ass cheek planted because that's what's connected to my foot which pushes the pedals like i can't be like doing a half cocked thing over here and so i feel like you can like i would i'm trying to get out like it would get totally numb in the car like after like 20 minutes or so of driving and then if if I stood up, just burns and itches and hurts. And it's no fun, no fun at all. So Taylor, you liked her like anti-war rhetoric, but here's a tweet from her in 2015. It's bad enough that the U.S. has not been bombing al-Qaeda and al-Nusra in Syria,

but it's mind boggling that we protest Russia's bombing of these terrorists. Then right after that, Al-Qaeda attacked us on 9-11, and they must be defeated. Obama won't bomb them in Syria. Putin did. Hashtag never forget 9-11. She was only 34 when she said that. Cut us some slack.

But a child. Well, I mean, I'm not stoked on that. I just want us out of all that shit. there's no reason for us to lose american lives you know um well i mean you know they sign up for that that's what they want to do even so like you don't want to see that i just wanted the free college ah sucks to suck get over there and kill people. Yeah. You can see the trending, the way things were going lately. We've been at war for a decade. A decade? Two decades.

Two decades! How long has it been since we... It's been 19 years. It's been since 2003, right? 2003 we went into Iraq. I'm talking about Afghanistan. That was like the end of 2001.

Oh, well then, yeah, it's been like 18 years. Yeah. Okay. And I don't even know if you consider the Iraq one really out. Right? I mean, I remember Clinton was doing stuff. Like he was air bombs and air raids, I mean, to say, in Iraq when we weren't in Iraq, kind of. Yeah.

Well, he had that no-fly zone. You couldn't have them flying over their own country well i think for the u.s when we talk about how much we've been at war i think we've been the number i just looked at myself for this before we've been at war for 222 out of our 239 years of existence so there's a good chance it's going to be some conflict going on meanwhile china's over there sim citying here we come to save the day yeah we're like the saint we're like the saint louis blues of governments because we make the playoffs every year but nothing ever gets done it's actually really frustrating watching a country like china like for the u.s when people

get scared they tend to turn inwards so like you're seeing people like in the united kingdom you know the eu like people are getting scared they want to go away from everybody they want to anti-globalism anti blah blahblah, blah, blah. They want to be their own strong, sovereign country. Meanwhile, China is like fucking building up like all over the world. One of the things they've started recently is the Belt and Road Initiative, where they're like building all of these roads, all of these trade routes. They're building ports in these countries around the world. They're investing in education and transport in Africa. Man, it's really sad to see that like it feels like China is like making all of the right moves to become like the next like global like economic leader of the world and we're like trying to increase i think trump just announced we're increasing tariffs on mexico which is like our nafta trading partner like what

the fuck like i don't know it used to seem like it's like borderline conquering africa because they'll like go into namibia or whatever and be like oh we give you big loan but you have to hire our firm and then you pay back later you build road and then they build the road and namibia or whatever and be like, oh, we give you big loan, but you have to hire our firm, and then you pay back later. You build road, and then they build the road, and Namibia's like, we do not have any money, though. And they're like, oh, that sucks. We just take ownership of this, Dan. They're doing that with ports. Yeah. They do that with ports.

They have all these military routes and everything open up, too. They'll buy a port. They offer to build it. They'll loan you the money for it, but their companies have to work it, so it's a massive job program for their country. When they build the port, the country can't pay for the port oh well we'll just run it and it's like oh okay well yeah damn yeah it's so ridiculous like and it's smart china literally is they're just conquering africa right now but it should be the u.s but instead like we freak out over like we look at something like the tpp and we're like

oh no there might be some bad stuff it's like okay cool well we can take we can leave the tpp and not have any say in it, but that multilateral trade agreement is still going to happen, except now there's no influence with the U.S. there. Like, now people like China are getting more influence in places like South America. Now we're in a trade war with China, and we don't have any friends, right? The TPP was an agreement with all these Pacific countries

except China. So we were really going to isolate them and twist their arm. Trump immediately ends that and says, we'll fight China all by ourselves without any friends, it's much harder should i to be fair that was dead under obama i won't blame trump for that although trump supported the same rhetoric and killing the tbps everyone else did and everyone on fucking reddit everything happened kyle what is this topic you linked here oh i just uh someone else linked this to me it's because it's from our idiots with guns uh one of my favorites oh i like the one above it oh that's

taylor then oh my mistake sorry oh we can do we can do mine we can do either one i i thought you've made your decision yeah so this is uh it's called in cell plastic surgery yes and uh it's it's guys breaking booms in their face so they can look like a Chad. And a Chad is a cool guy who slays. And that's what you want to be, which means you've got to add a couple inches of bone to your jaw and apparently your brow and all these other things. And the stories on this are so negative where it's more like, ha look at these fucking losers trying to get ladies here and meanwhile it's like here's 10 women who had fucking uh saline pumped into their tits and why it's brave it's like it's like what it's okay so i think this guy looks good am i crazy i'm not liking what seems to be some sort of above eye tattoo i don don't know. No, that's just a silly graphic,

like to exaggerate the bones that they would increase in order to. Yeah, that's not a human picture. Chad structure. That's just an artist rendering. But. Well, these guys all look good. Are they post-surgery? The three.

Let me see. What am I looking at here? Hold on. Let me scroll down more in the article. Oh, I don't see any am I looking at here hold on let me scroll down more in the article oh I don't see any photos in this article oh I see them these are naturally occurring

chads naturally occurring chads damn it yeah we want all the way down you can see before and afters now we're talking lookism users regularly photoshop each other's faces to show what they would look like if transformed into Chads. Okay. To my eye, neither of these guys need transforming.

I don't know. That one on the bottom looks like he would break into your home hide in the closet and while you were getting dressed for the shower he would come out full rod but he's got like some sort of a mask on covered in like poppers and he's like actively doing them as he stabs you i mean that i mean i don't dislike the guy anymore. That's pretty neat. I expected them to be more, you know, fedora-wearing-my-lady-type dudes than this. The one on the bottom in particular, I feel like,

is a bigger improvement than the one on the top. But neither of them strike me as... You can't find anyone to love them back. Have you heard of the black pill no the boy is that uh what is that so taking the I think um so incels can cream her rings but taking the black pill that's when you realize that so

have you heard of like pickup artists and stuff yep yeah like these are people that have like taken the red pill and they're like oh well women are all whores and sluts and they're trying to blah blah blah so you need to play them this way right so you go through your pickup artist blah blah blah but however when you when you come to the real truth and you realize wait a second you swallow the black pill and you're like the people that are going to get fucked we're always going to be fucked you're born in chad and nothing you do can ever move you to chadness and you are forever part of the 80 of guys that will never fuck girls that's

80% of guys don't fuck girls. Yeah, well that's right. It's supposed to be 20% of guys fuck 80% of the girls or whatever Right, that's always like the tribal shit that they give and yeah, that's their math I don't know tender data is it adds up to a hundred Taylor Can't you come is it is it like a cute like reddit slash black pill is that a um? I think it's just the insult community But that's like general terminology when you've taken the black pill it's when you've realized that the world is the way it is and no amount of combing your hair doing the right fashion or working out is ever going to change it if you're not a chad you're just not a chad you're born with it you can't become it fuck off that's like the black pill right oh incel's been banned damn it where am

i supposed to go to find funny incel things and like what you said woody it's really sad because you look at some of these guys otherwise and you're like you look at him it's like dude you actually you look pretty okay like you don't look bad you don't even look like they're not incels because their looks most of the time now if you're like the butterfly skin boy yeah first of all first of all kill yourself second of all look we'd all kill ourselves if we were the if we were the butterfly skin i would yeah i'd fucking blow my brains out i'd myself. I'd jump in front of a moving bus. I would die immediately. As soon as I had the strength to kill

myself, which is a real, who knows, judging by, actually, he's the power lifting butterfly skin boy, so he's got the strength. He could have dropped that. Every time he's benching 350, he's got to be thinking, maybe I could just drop it and it'd be all be over

i give up all my strength to have real people lips i don't know the butterfly skin boys well then google it but don't link it no don't don't link it's actually unbelievably sad google it but don't link it please please please i don't like looking at it it hurts me on the inside i'm serious when i say i'd kill myself if I look like that. It's not meant to be one of my cruel jokes about people being different. It's instead just an honest commentary on how I wouldn't want to go through life as that. Basically, I think the problem is that your skin, like the top layer of your epidermis or whatever, is like constantly blistering with the bottom.

And it's like you're constantly forming but so your entire body is at like every point in time like covered like 85 with blisters and white pale blisters yeah you have to have bandages changed all over your body constantly showering it's like or taking a bath i shouldn't say showering you can't show it's like is an excruciating experience. I bet his asshole's infected 80% of the time. You're prone to infections. You're constantly in pain. He is a really rough. That's how you know God's not real. That's how you know God's not real.

What are you talking about? No, I prayed to God that I would get to work on time yesterday and he answered my prayers. What are you talking about? I totally made those last two lights. Every time you hear people say shit like that. He's very into the little miracles. I found my keys. I totally made those last two lights. Every time you hear people say shit like that, yeah. He's very into the little miracles. I found my keys.

It's quite peculiar. So many of those miracles seem to stop as soon as cell phones came around too. It's always a little strange, huh? A lot of those UFO sightings and the Bigfoot and all that shit and the Loch Ness Monster, all those seem to stop too over the past 20. I wonder, a lot of you guys were older in here right

when I was growing up there were tons of videos of UFOs and shit because it was always that VHS grainy shit now everyone has a fucking cell phone I would have thought I'd seen a whole bunch more of those fucking aliens flying around seems like aliens are aware of our cell phone technology they have been counteracted really weird as soon as they saw

the iPhone 1 come out they made a great deal of distance to make sure they couldn't be tracked. After all that time, they realized, let's turn the fucking beacon on top of the ship off. What were you thinking? These aliens are even more dangerous than the ones coming from below the border,

I tell you what, because they'll steal not only our jobs, the jobs of our computers. That's right. They're very good at math. That's how they built the... Anybody have... They're also behind... I could take... computers that's right they're very good at math that's how they built the anybody have they're also behind the homo-sexual agenda i could take you know these interdimensional travelers are

behind the homo-sexual agenda that is why they are always probing the anus of the american man they are trying to turn you into a homo-sexual the government are you gonna let globalists aliens to this planet so they can fuck you in your ass? Or are you going to buy my Alex Jones Infowars.com slash ass shield to keep your ass safe and sound? Made of strong, American-made aluminum alloy. It will protect your rectum from any

incoming invasion from invaders south of the border or north of Neptune. Three easy payments of $19.99 and one very difficult payment of $19.99 will get you your ass shield that you need. Do you see how red I am?

That's because I am shielded from any sort of rape attempt. Do you guys ever worry that you get sponsors that watch your stream and when they see how much more enthusiastic you are about your fake ad reads than your real ones? I was very enthusiastic about the cock pills. That's a good point.

I've been twirling this watch around for an hour and a half. Next time we get a new sponsor, let me read it as Alex Jones and we'll see if they stick around. Absolutely. I'm curious now if you've ever gotten an email where someone has emailed you and is like, you know, we watched your stream the other day and we really want to do, you know, an ad read with you guys. The plug-in that you did for that ass thing was great just like deliver it exactly like that we've never gotten email or chis gets those emails the only time

he's gotten he didn't even get on to us he was laughing is when the 100 food that's where you're 100 that's just you we all so the 100 we all did. I don't take the blame. They told us to like, be honest about it. And then we went to their website and we saw that other people sort of mocked the product as they sold it. So we were like, all right. And we just took it.

We dialed it up 10 more times. I'm pretty sure Taylor said it was good for sealing potholes. No, I said it was a good substitute for quick crete in a pinch. Yeah. And they did not like that. That was the first and last time they sponsored us, and

we're okay with that. It was like a weight loss thing. I remember saying that you'll lose even more weight if you dump all the powder in your toilet and then just drink water. Yeah, it was awful. That was a fun clip. I have a clip here that Chiz sent me. He tells me that we should watch this. I asked him what it that Chiz sent me. He tells me that we should watch this.

I asked him what it was. He said it's better if we go in unprepared and see what Wings said. There's a time stamp on it. I assume it's intentional. Yes, he wants us to start at 12.03. And he says, you know, a couple minutes of this and we'll get some gold. He said.

I don't know. I haven't seen this. One sec. It's still loading up. I hope it's not too rough. I'm good. Are you ready, Destiny? Hold on.

I'm opening it. Our wings guy, right? Ready, set, play. I always put it like this, right? Woody from the podcast, not podcast show, Pankil already, Mr. Woodward. He says his superpower is to be able to fall asleep and take a nap anywhere, any place,

in any kind of setting, right? That's his superpower. Kyle said his superpower is to be able to like close his ears without earplugs like oh i can do that he bullshitted his way into a conversation one time on pka where he where he said he like would like close his ears i can do it internally when he's shooting guns so far i like this right i really can i still don't believe that's. That's Kyle's superpower. I can do it. I promise. My superpower is I can drive any car that's gasoline or diesel and tell you exactly what's wrong with that motherfucker. That's my superpower. And I'm bullshitting.

I'm so good. I can tell you how far a hub on a truck is, how much life's left on it, and how much rust is on the internal bearing just by driving it. I'm super in tune with my automobiles. I know how they take every type of bump. I know every rattle in them. I know every, I know how they take every type of bump. I know every rattle in them. I know every creak. I know when the heat's infecting the plastic.

I know what you're thinking of. Everything. I got one. That's my superpower. Should we pause? Jawsome! He's gonna insult us in a minute. Oh, he is?

I don't know. People come at me acting like I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about. I remember Kyle said specifically that if you want somebody to pretend like they know what's wrong with the vehicle, you talk to wings. I've rebuilt more engines than Kyle has driven cars.

I'm in a very privileged seat right now. Because I'm almost debt free. seat right now. Because, like, I'm almost debt-free. All right, that's good enough. That is pretty good enough. Pretty much any money that I make. He didn't mention my superpower, that I can steal jobs from podcast hosts in a single bound.

Get out. So, the idea that he's rebuilt more engines than I've driven cars. I mean, he picked the wrong person to say that about, obviously, because I've driven hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of cars. It's kind of been the nature of a lot of my dealings. Sounds like you're just underestimating how many engines he's rebuilt, actually. I used to sell cars. Could it be during your days you drove 1,000 different cars?

I would say over 1 thousand cars for sure. I mean, I owned, I say owned, you know, my dad gave me cars when I was a kid. When I was 16, I didn't go out and get a job and buy a car. I was in fucking high school. So my dad gave me cars. But like I went through five cars before I was at a high school. This guy's still driving the same truck that he had in high school. He has, I don't know where he's getting these engines to rebuild.

Well, he's almost out of debt. where he's getting these engines to rebuild. He's almost out of debt, Kyle. He's in a very privileged position. Maybe he's Carl from Sling Blade. He's like, I rebuilt a lot of engines out in the shed. But I don't think so. So if he's rebuilt 500 engines, he's still not even there. He's not even close. Because there would be days when I'd drive a dozen cars,

and it wasn't out of the ordinary. Like- You worked at a car dealership. Yes, for years. And like, you know, my dad has, and I have rebuilt many cars, dozens of cars that we've built. And like, I drove race cars for a couple of years.

I drag race and went through three or four of those and I drive other people's drag race cars. They'd be like, hey, you wanna run my car down the strip? Yes, I do. You wanna drive mine? Yes, let's swap cars and you run mine and I'll run yours. I can't tell you how many cars I've driven. So that's just an absurd point, but that's neither here nor there. The funny thing is that he has this diagnostic ability, like a dog that can detect cocaine in a fucking car or something like that. I was going to go with one of those weird cancer sniffers.

Yes. One of those cancer sniffing dogs. When he was at my house, um, he was, he was homesick and missing his mama and his, and his house. And he started like making up things to try to leave early.

And one of them was that there was something wrong with his truck. And so we get in his truck and we drive down the road and I'm very familiar with the type of truck he's in. Cause I owned the exact model and he's just like, you hear that? And I'm like, yeah, it's changing gears.

It's like, it doesn't sound good. You see how it like revs up and then it shifts gears. And I think that's how an automatic transmission usually works. Something's wrong. We got to find a mechanic. I'm like, well,

that's kind of going to cut into workout time. We'll flub it. We'll flub it. Let's just film 20 minutes of me doing different things, edit all that together. And then like, we'll go look for mechanics. I'm like, well, that's kind of going to cut into workout time. We'll flub it. We'll flub it. Let's just film 20 minutes of me doing different things, edit all that together, and then we'll go look for mechanics. That seems a little dishonest to all the people paying money into this Kickstarter and cheering for you. But, I mean, if that's what's going to get you motivated for tomorrow, then let's do that. And so we find him the best mechanic in the area. He goes and drops the truck off.

The best mechanic. Ask anyone. Anyone. And like three days later, he's like, could you believe it? They said there's nothing wrong with my car. They don't know what you're talking about.

And like, think about this. We all know how mechanics are. If you take them a brand new fucking car and you're like, hey, I don't like the way the bearings sound. They're going to be like,

yeah, they're shot. I think you need a new set. And how about an oil change and some, maybe a new transmission so well it is a little bald yeah yeah that that's not a thing that mechanics do if mechanics can find something a little worn they're like yeah let's uh let's replace it but let's use american parts you don't want to let's get some with some markup in it they find nothing

they find nothing it's it's It's literal what is it when you imagine that you have illnesses? Hypochondriac, hypochondria. He is a vehicular hypochondriac. He's a hypocharniac. He's a hypocharniac. So I rebut everything that he has said. It is nonsense, but everybody knows.

I was going in a different direction with that. He was saying that he can drive a car and to tell you how much rust is on the bearings, probably zero. Yeah, because they're bearings. And they're soaking in oil all the time. But I'm thinking of it by the crank. But anyway, he bought a Mustang

with a broken motor mount and didn't notice it. Right? Good point. Good point. All right, well, there's your swoosh of this argument. Checkmate!

Steven, are you up to date on all I've heard of him, but your history with him is way more extensive than what I am familiar with. If you need a nice little history sum up, like a year or so ago, maybe a little longer than that, Mr. Medeker made one of his review videos of Wings

and it is, I think it's one of the biggest videos on this channel. Probably over a million. Yeah, over a million. God damn. It's pretty entertaining. Pretty telling. I am a Wings of Redemption historian. I know more about them than anyone in the world. And I say that not braggadociously. It's

just a fact. The man lived with me. I've been to his house multiple times. I did this show with him for years. I would say that Woody is only second to me because he didn't live with the man for a month. Thanks to grandma, it's probably less than you and more than me. And Kyle's knowledge and intensity in this is so true

because it was like maybe the third time I'd met Kyle in real life like eight years ago. And we were at like this hotel. And like, I saw him go, Hey, Kyle, what's up? He's like, Hey, Taylor, come in the room. We're watching this Wings of Redemption video. And he just dragged me in there and we're watching that laughing.

It's a storied history of keeping tabs on him. Did he disprove God in that video? He did. He tried to. I remember we all watched that. Yeah. Yeah. He thinks he's a metallurgist because he used to pour sand into a melter or something like

that in pre-measured quantities. And he thinks that that makes him some sort of a metallurgist. But the guy doesn't know the periodic table anymore than he knows a nutritional table. And so it's just a big joke. And it was just ridiculous. He made this video where he's like, hell can't exist. Because you see, when you burn something, you make carbon. And eventually, all the material is gone and all you got left is carbon. So you see, if you were burning everlastingly in hell, eventually there'd be no more fuel. And I look at Woody and I'm like,

does he not realize that hell is a magical place? Where that's where fucking physics don't come into play? And Woody's like, I don't think so, no. No, I don't think he realizes that. You couldn't use gold roads in heaven. There's not enough traction for the tires. Let alone enough gold for the tires let alone enough

gold in the entire world yeah dude when you realize how little gold there actually is in the world it's pretty small it's really small you you can fit it all in like one warehouse like one not even huge warehouse like every bit of gold on earth it seems really big in fort knox i can't reconcile those things in my head right like i they say you could take in pictures i haven't been to movies and stuff you know like like i don't know that we've ever i've been there i've been i've been i've driven past is there a tour oh okay i've driven past it and it's it's a very scary facility it's very near to where they keep um the biological and chemical weapons They have like this big stash up there in Kentucky of like biological and chemical weapons that I think,

I don't remember why they were keeping them. It wasn't like for war purposes. It was more like for like scientific purposes. Like, like if they were ever used against us to like counteract them or something like that, like it was where they researched biological and chemical weapons or something like that.

And I was like, I don't even want to fucking be here. My friend was like, well, the CDC's in Atlanta. I'm like, shit, that's right. Fuck, they must have really scary stuff in Atlanta. Yep. I didn't realize

that Fort Knox had a lot more than gold. They have important historical documents like the Magna Carta. Oh, that's cool. I must be a fucking idiot because I didn't even know we still had the Magna Carta. Oh, that's cool. I must be a fucking idiot because I didn't even know we still had the Magna Carta. I didn't either. To be honest, I was like, shit. Wasn't that signed

in the late 1500s? We still have that fucking thing? What was it made of? I bet it's written on him. What's the Magna Carta written on? Is this something you think that I know? You're about to be very disappointed. Just a huge copy. Originally published in 1215.

So I was a mere stone's throw away. I think they might not have always been there. Like during World War II it was there. They've been returned to D.C. The Gettysburg Address falls under that. The Gutenberg Bible. The Articles of confederation and lincoln's second inaugural address so they store some like precious things there in addition

to gold yeah um this picture i'm showing is a lot of gold it's more than like how much is it though if you compress it all right it's on shelves it's there's a lot of air in there because i thought if you took all the gold ever mined, all of it, all of it, it would fit in a big room, like a big living room. How much gold exists? I just googled this. I just spent a minute reading the past five things and they're all

trying to sell you fucking gold and I didn't see a picture. 2.5 million tons. That sounds like a lot. But that can't be right because I wanted a different number that's more impressive. Yes. It's a ton with two ends

which is 2204 pounds. Oh well. I didn't know that. So wait, a ton with one end is 2,000 pounds. So it's about 5 billion pounds. I think 5 billion pounds. Is one metric? What am I doing. I think 5 billion pounds. Is one metric? What am I doing? I don't understand this.

I'm not an expert. I just know that one's 2,204 pounds and one's 2,000 pounds. That's all I got for you. Okay. I know less about that than I do the MagnaCard and I don't know anything about that. That was third grade. God damn it. I believed for so long that you could

fit all the gold in the world in like a giant room like you said Woody I mean you might be able to it's very dense it's like a very similar density to lead oh you're actually right this much is like 70 pounds okay well

that's a lot of gold I don't own any gold I got some gold coins. I looked it up. I think people might be curious. A ton with two Ns, T-O-N-N-E, is a metric ton. And Kyle's right, 2,204 pounds. Whereas a ton with one N is a, and it's 1,000 kilograms.

That's why it's a metric ton. A ton with one N, they're actually just alternative spellings, but the fact is it kind of works like kyle said because america never uses that metric version so it's so a ton with one end is just like the imperial measurement two thousand pounds two thousand pounds yeah and the one with two ends is a thousand kilograms and they're actually kind of both both but since americans don't use that other one do you ever think about weird shit like how long would we survive if every bug on earth suddenly had an instinct to kill us not very long at all like we would be fucked wait how smart are the bugs are they just coming right at us like they're like zombies they just they're coming right okay

problem really what's your plan no dude so here's your high as a kite they would fuck us up there's too many there's a lot of insight in this Killer Bean Nightmare in 1997, so hold your horses. Yeah, yeah, Taylor. Recognize who you're talking to. I apologize, continue. You gotta think for one thing. If they were all just coming after us, then there'd be no more bugs doing bug stuff, right? There'd be

no more pollination. That's gonna hurt our food. It definitely has to. Might cause a bit of famine. You know? There'd be no more bugs cleaning up the dead animals like they do. It might cause disease. But if there's just bees coming at us and ants coming at us, like

a bunch of bug zappers, I think we'd be alright. Dude, if there are 20 hornets in your room right now, you're having a fucking panic attack. Ah, that's right! They have to be hornets, Taylor! Now imagine tens of millions of these. I've donned my Hornet suit.

Like, like I can't even, we'd be fucked. I think you're thinking too, is like, like there are like millions of bugs that you have no idea how many bugs could even get to you right now. Because most of them don't want to, right? Most of them either don't know there's food there or don't,

there's not the right type of food. Like if every bug was just like motivated to go into your house, holy shit, I can't imagine how much fucking shit there would be. Just red ants alone are a big issue. I could defeat the bug army. Dude, you would get molested by the bug army. He does have several flamethrowers. I do have several

flamenwarfers. Those bugs would hold you down and the ants would do that thing where they nod each other together and do a big dildo and they'd just fuck you. Oh, thank God, because he's been waiting for weeks for his dildo. Why are they stinging while they do it? They're stinging while they

rape me. I've got a different topic. If you could get rid of one minor annoyance about being a human, what do you remove? I don't want to sweat ever again. Having to sleep. Kyle's was similar. I want to sweat on command because I really do appreciate the endurance

that the cooling benefit gives me. It's our greatest evolutionary advantage. Sure, sure, sure. But if I'm just walking to my truck where the AC's going to run, maybe if I could turn that off. You know, let my body temp go. Maybe pant a little bit and then turn the ac on

yeah dogs don't sweat they're fine get out of here i don't want to sweat ever again um and uh and i would never i won't need deodorant now that's never gonna be a thing i want to put that those chemicals you'll still get stinky no you won't that's from sweat and uh and my ass will never stink again uh from from just from just ass. This is the second time at least tonight that Kyle had complete confidence in hypothetical things that we can't verify. I guarantee Hillary will go to war in the alternative universe in which she won.

Hard and fast. That's the way I do things. All right. Maybe, maybe. No, definitely so. You won't stink if you can't sweat that's where the stink comes from i don't know if it's a minor inconvenience i guess yeah but i shower after i poop oh you're one of those types yeah you shower every time after you poop yeah what if you're out

and about i shit once a day it's at 8 a.m and then i shower at 8 05 a.m that's normal but i'm saying let's say you're out and about for the day okay you know 3 30 in the afternoon comes and maybe you had something a little rancid the day before you got a poop and you're at home depot what do you do it's 1 p.m you need to pick me up well if it happened i'd take a shit and then i'd like wipe my ass properly and then i take a shower when i got home, so I don't want stinky ass. Kyle, I think you are underestimating the efficacy of a one-wipe Charlie. And it's gotta be clean. One-wipe Charlie is at least what a shower

can provide. It's not at least, because I can't work my finger around the hole and really get every little bit. You like to get knuckle deep to make sure that I'm really... I go three fingers on my one wipe, Charlie. What do you think the bad dragon

toy is for? I need the tentacle with the suction cup on the end. I want to be clean. I'm going to engage in analingus. You should really respect your partner. If there's any issue with the wet wipes, it's not that you're not clean enough. It's that you suspiciously smell

good. I want to hear what steven's minor inconvenience that he wants to get rid of is um fuck i don't know there's like so many to pick you know here's one that i thought of lately um have you ever taken those absolutely the godsend perfect poops and you go to wipe when you're done, and there's nothing there. You don't even know if anything actually... A ghost poop. Yeah. Not... Well... Wait, wait a minute.

That's what I've always heard, is like a ghost poop, where you take a big shit and you wipe, and you're like, oh, it's like it's never there. Oh. Well, the reason why I question it is because I've heard the term ghost poop,

but I've heard people refer to that as when you take the poop, and it slips into the toilet, like down, and you get up and you look, and it's gone. I've heard that called a ghost poop. Okay, that's on the..., like down, and you get up and you look, and it's gone. I heard that probably ghost-coded. Okay, that's honestly what's funny.

I feel like that would be better. What the fuck? That would be nice. And then the worst feeling in the world, especially... You got to fish in there and find it, and then you just feel dirty, because now you have it. Yeah, everyone does that, Kyle. What's the best feeling in the world?

The worst feeling in the world is when you're at a friend's house, or God forbid. Oh, man, that 30 minutes after a shower where you feel it, where you have to take a poop. And you do it and you do your poop and you feel it coming out. And then it gets 80% of the way out and you're like, oh, no. And you know you're going to have to spend the next like fucking five minutes with fucking toilet paper getting everything out. That shit is fucking obnoxious. I just get back in the shower. I'm not that averse to water and i have

quite a solution for everything i have done what kyle is saying yeah i have been like you know what this is a poop that uh would better be served by a whole shower not a whole shower a tenth of a shower we have one specific area to clean the real issue is like head face and back that's what takes a while to clean if i I get in the shower, it's at least neck down. As a matter of fact, I'll even get my hair wet, but I might not wash it and start from scratch.

I don't want to get it wet. I got too much product in there. I find I don't have to re-add more product if it just gets wet. I shower quick. I use one of those three-in-one cheap-ass shampoos. And so I just just all on the head underarms dick and balls asshole are you kidding torso legs when i go when i go to hotels and they have that they have just that pump in the shower and i'm just like what is it my girlfriend's like

it's everything and i'm like let's go to rite aid let's go to Rite Aid. Let's go to Rite Aid. No, I like that. I like the convenience. I don't smell like summer breeze or whatever. I need two soaps and two shampoos or I can't even get in a goddamn shower. I have a brush on a long stick. It's almost like a back scratcher. You have chemically altered skin. That's true.

And you'll forever be sensitive. Accutane gave me perfect skin. And forevermore, you'll be sensitive to a number of natural occurring things like the sun i've had three pimples since 2006 that's nice yeah no that's why i like the back scratcher brush thing i feel like my back gets it prevents back pimples i have this thing right it's like a long rectangle with handles on either end it's an equivalent there's a difference there's one reason i like mine better this is it when i want like before i put soap on it and after i get the soap off i rub it on the shower head itself and then the shower head never gets like

a calcium buildup it looks brand new i do the same thing but not for that i want to get the soap scum out of it yeah yeah yeah it's just it's like ball it up and like right but when you actually put the brush on the shed it serves two purposes ah okay it cleans it out and it cleans the showerhead i've got that water filter thing that like prevents calcium buildup like like i didn't install it just came with the place but i but i definitely see which i love that back loofah though like like if you if you're out there and i told ice beside in this he was complaining about his back acne and he has gross back acne and i was like dude you can get rid of that it takes a while to get rid of back acne it's not like your face like those are deep seated pimples like like they're bad yeah and to get and they're to get rid of them it's going to take three months

but in three months you're going to have a perfect back but here's what you got to do ice i was like you need this product it's 11 it's on amazon it's it's got a soft side and a rough side you're using the rough side and it's going to hurt a little when you get out your back's going to be red every shower your back is going to be red and you once a week no once a day let's talk about every side over over my silly head um but but yeah you scrub your back once a day with benzoyl peroxide 10 unless your skin starts peeling and then you back it down to 2.5 and you do that every fucking day so no benzoyl peroxide um acne um cream what is that like it's a cream like what is it it it a small tube I'm looking at? You get a big tube.

It's like 7 ounces or something like that and I go through a tube a week. Steven, if you're not aware, Kyle has a Patrick Bateman level skin treatment regimen. I'm 57. He does every single day. Don't lie, you're 61 years old.

Steve's not paying attention at all. that was i totally am and i have a real hot take i'm about to uh yeah lay out the hot take lay it down i'm gonna trigger the fuck out of um i'm gonna trigger the fuck out of kyle right now i don't think there's fuck all you can do for acne except for accutane and i am incredibly confident about this um i could link you pictures. My acne was so fucking horrible in grade school and in high school. Well, not maybe grade school, but in high school. It was ridiculous.

And lots of teens had these problems. Here's what I think happens. I think that you go through product after product after thing after thing after thing, and I tried everything. Cutting out all dairy, sleeping on a clean towel every night. Chocolate, sugar, changing the bed sheet. Yeah, changing diets like all of that, different types of salicylic acid based

cleaners, et cetera, et cetera. And the reason why I feel so confident that there is no surefire way to get rid of acne is it's the same thing as penis enlargement. If penis enlargement became possible, you would know it because every fucking person would be doing it and it would be the most well thing, no thing ever. And and for acne today there is still no thing where you can look like how do you get rid of acne there's 50 million home remedies that people suggest there's 50 million things people say i don't think there's a way to do it i think you just i'm talking about adult acne though i like adult acne is is a little bit different than that sort of like like you like i don't get acne anymore like that is a recent occurrence like

in the last two years i finally stopped getting acne because like my hormones finally stabilized and i and i'm like you're 32 i'm a grown man yeah i'm finally a man grown and and like that's over but throughout my 20s like i couldn't stop it i could only hold it back you know i could keep it to like two pimples all the time on my face, pretty much. And there'd be times where it was like, oh my God, it's right here. Or it's in my ear, or it's behind my ear. It was awful. Behind your ear, great place to get one. Yeah, it's the most painful place.

Not in your ear, though. I popped this one on the bottom of my neck once, and the pus was green. I've never heard of it was it was disgusting it was like it went on for weeks it was like an abscess tumor inside my fucking neck and like i'd squeeze it and it would just like make it inflame like it wouldn't pop and then finally i stuck a goddamn needle in the motherfucker and you lanced it it must have went in a half inch or something like way deeper than i thought like i went a little bit just blood a little more just blood and i was just like well i guess i either i'll hit my trachea or i'll fucking get rid of this pimple and finally it was just when it popped

it felt like smashing an egg or something and just like like all over my hands and like the mirror was like like i had a cum shot of like green-yellow pus on it. Oh, I remember that shit from when you had the camera on your face. But as a teenager, I never mastered it. But as an adult, and Ice is an adult, he has back acne caused by being filthy and not washing regularly. Yeah, if you're like a disgusting fuck and you don't shower at all and you're super oily or whatever, yeah, that can probably cause it. He showers like once every six days. Then yeah, that'll probably do it. So it's oil, it's sweat,

and it's dirt, and they accumulate and clog your pores. And that's what he's got. And he did steroids for a while, I think. Right? He said that, right? Did he? I'm actually not positive. Yeah, I'm not positive either. It was a while since we last had him on. Yeah, just forget I said that. I'm probably wrong about that.

I shouldn't have said that. But his back acne was very bad. He was very buff, though. Like, he was bodybuilder. I've had that same question in my head. He was Tobey Maguire's Spider-Man. Or better. He was lean.

He had a really good physique. Yeah. So, like, for his situation, this guy needs to exfoliate. He's got a whole layer of, like, dead,, I was like, this guy needs to exfoliate, you know, he's got a whole layer of like dead, dirty skin, like clogging his pores. But I agree with you as a teenager, I never found a cure. You know, I could just hold it at bay. And throughout my early, my early twenties, I could just hold it at bay. Uh, and, and that was as good as I could do. Steve, I will take Accutane. No, I didn't. But like i i know accutane is some real shit because you

see like the before and afters and it's like it works for everybody but like so many other like home remedies and shit everybody will fucking run through and some stuff people say that like some stuff is working and some stuff isn't but i think it's just the cycles of acne coming and going sometimes you just get lucky i think it has some real downsides oh yeah i hit all i hit all of the tick boxes for the downsides when i was in eighth grade i got on accutane and i i still my my skin is paler than it was when i was younger like you get pale skin i burn much easier i had chronic nosebleeds for years even after i got off of it where like it just be out of nowhere you're just walking around not even winter time nosebleeds is getting off

easy like i there's someone in my universe tried accutane and they had like external bleeding you know like nose bleeds on the outside of their face or like just like cracked overly dry skin oh yeah like at the corner the cracked skin thing was real like your lips your lips are so dry like if you accidentally in winter like smile or something like it'll split right down the middle of your lip i didn't have my good doctor back then so i couldn't get it but i wanted it so bad i wanted it so bad i'd go to the doctor and they'd prescribe fucking benzoyl peroxide and i was just like this is bullshit i could buy this at fucking rite-a this is fucking bullshit give me some real shit my mom's just like let's try it and it's like we tried it i look like a goblin it's hard i struggle even now as a guy who should have a grip on these things at this age know what a good doctor is right does a good doctor give you

everything you ask for or does a good doctor like prevent pancreatic cancer from you know the things that you would have done to yourself i have never maybe i've never had a good doctor because like every time i've had something i had to self-diagnose it with fucking WebMD and tons of research like like like I don't mean like an hour research I mean like 20 hours of fucking research to diagnose like two of the things that I've had that I won't go into in too much depth but but but your doctor may or not know if you've got a touch of the gonorrhea if you got a bit of syphilis the doctor may not know it for years and you've got to self diagnose that shit and literally like hey doctor i have syphilis that's what i had that you couldn't figure out remember it's weird that damn well you're gonna need some penicillin i'm like yeah

100 milliliters or whatever it was the thing about syphilis i i've read is that it gets cured like almost accidentally a lot of times. The symptoms can be tough to pick, but then you get strep throat and you knock out that dormant syphilis while you're at it. The doctor describes something to sell in along the way. Getting a fever

can kill a lot of diseases. That's the reason that we get fevers. It doesn't kill syphilis, just so you know. It doesn't kill syphilis. It doesn you know. It doesn't kill syphilis. It doesn't kill syphilis. Syphilis, I had no fucking symptoms whatsoever. I had a little rash right here on my collarbone. And I was like, huh, what's that?

And then all the skin peeled off my palms of my hands and the soles of my feet. And I was like, what's this? And they're like, we don't know. And I was like, okay, well, try this we don't know and i was like okay well try this 200 a tube cream on them you'll need a few tubes all right i guess that works i'm walking around wearing fucking rubber gloves with olive oil in them for six months you probably look like a dick i had to film videos wearing tactical gloves i was gripping a gun made my hands bleed wait wait so you actually had syphilis and it made your hand skin peel off?

All of it. Wow. Is that a syphilis sign? Yes. I had no idea. Type syphilis. Palms and souls. And you'll see.

I have pictures somewhere. My hands were covered in blisters that would then pop. And then I would try to peel to make it more look better. But then it's just... You know when a blister comes off and it's that new pink skin after a while that's all my hands and feet were dude this is fucking gross dude yeah yeah yeah i and like i just had started with a like with a new girlfriend at the time and like it cleared up like three months into our relationship like i'd known her for like three months and then it cleared up and i was like you don't remember that when my hands were peeling off and she's like i never noticed and i'm like well thank god she's like yeah that's gross like i was just hiding my hands

from her all the time i was the bottom of your feet did you get any dick sores no nothing like that nothing on my genitals anything like that it was just palms of my hands and soles of my feet. And it was like, finally, like not that long ago, I figured out what it was. I took an STD test and then I Google, I was like, I'm not even going to leave this one up to the doctor. Let me Google what my treatment should be. And I go to the doctor and I'm like, I need this much penicillin. He's like, why? I was like, because I have syphilis. And he's like, ah, you sure? Yes, I'm sure. I took a test. He's like, well, all right. Just so you know, it's a little expensive.

I was like, I don't fucking care what it costs. Just sign it up. High five. Like, no, my hands did that for like a couple of months and then they healed over and then it was all good. But then, you know, it's just like dormant. And then it becomes non-communicable after like nine months or a year and a half or something like that, somewhere in there.

So now you can't give someone else syphilis, thank God. But like, it was just two shots of penicillin in my ass and it was game over for that. And then the rash went away, which had been there. You could only see this little bitty rash in my collarbone after a hot shower. So it was like completely asymptomatic. Like I had no symptoms for forever.

But yeah. That's why syphilis is dangerous. So yeah, i don't think i have a very good doctor but he will give me some stuff you know and nice what's the worst disease or sickness you guys have ever had oh that well there was that you know i don't want to retell the story this many times but like you know there was that time i went to new mexico to film that shit and i had strep throat and it was like the flu and like like i was coughing up blood and uh i was congested it was it was nose ears ear aches ear infection like throat infection chest infection like the whole the whole nine yeah and and i was he gave me anti-inflammatory shots gave me a bottle of codeine and sent my ass to the fucking desert. And then my fucking friend threw a tear gas grenade at me. So that exploded at my feet.

And that wasn't fun because that really exacerbated everything. So then I was really fucked up for about two days after the tear gas. But I had the codeine, and that makes everything better. That's the sickest I think I've ever been for sure. But then that syphilis fucking thing was was like the if i didn't treat that i'd went insane it rotted my brain out in another decade yeah you would that's what happened to al capone that's what happened to al capone in an era where the cure existed mind you like al capone wasn't in the 20s, all right? They had penicillin. Oh, he was.

Well, he was, but his time of having syphilis wasn't in the 20s. Nah, I'm just going to talk with my hands in prison. It's going to work out. You know, that kind of shit. Steven, what's the worst disease you've ever had? The worst sickness? I don't think I've actually had any bad diseases. I had the flu once, which is actually really shitty. I think a lot of people get colds and they say they have the flu but i had like seven days so like

three days of constantly like feeling like shit oh i'm sorry i know what the worst thing i ever had this is the worst thing i've ever had in my entire life fuck everything else first of all big shout out to people with crones or ibs in the audience I got food poisoning like I think a year or two ago. And I guess I have like a really good stomach. I can travel anywhere in the world, drink water, eat food. I never have problems. I eat spicy food all the fucking time. Never have like the shits or the Taco Bell stuff or whatever.

Always been fine. I got food poisoning going through fucking the Omaha airport. Fuck this airport. I got food poisoning going through there. And for like a day, it sounds so dumb to say it, but like every 15 minutes, like clockwork, I had to go to the fucking toilet and for like a day that sounds so dumb to say it but like every 15 minutes like clockwork i had to go to the fucking toilet and shit like water shit and it was the worst feeling in the world because maybe it was exacerbated because i was like with a girl for the weekend so it was literally the worst time ever but like i couldn't do anything like if i drove i had to

make sure that wherever the fuck i go from the moment my ass gets off this toilet to on the car to wherever I need to be able to get in another bathroom or I'm going to shit myself. If I go out to eat, I have to make sure that like I'm like close to a bathroom and it was fucking horrible. And I remember that was like it lasted for it was only two days. But I just remember thinking at the end of it, like I had a friend growing up when I played Starcraft somewhat professionally. I had a friend growing up with Crohn's disease and I know that he would always he was always emo. He's like, I don't want to go to tournaments. It just feels bad, blah, blah, blah. I have a lot more sympathy now

for people that have bowel-related problems. Being tied to where your existence can only occur 15 minutes from a bathroom at any given point in time felt absolutely fucking horrible. Holy shit. And these were shits. These weren't like, ah, fuck, I gotta poop.

I've got five to 10 minutes tops to find a bathroom. This was like, oh shit, I got 10 seconds. Fuck, no lie. And minutes tops to find a bathroom. This was like, oh, shit, I got 10 seconds. Fuck, it's coming. There's nothing I can do to fucking stop it. I have to plug a finger up my ass. Oh, my God, it was so fucking horrible. Yeah. I feel bad about it now, but when I was 12,

we had a kid on our hockey team with IBS. We didn't know the severity of it or whatnot, but his last name was Cooper. And so we called him pooper all the time. I saw where that was headed immediately. At the time, at the time it was just funny because we were 12. We didn't know.

And then looking back, it's like, Oh fuck. We had like IBS or Crohn's or something. That wasn't cool. Yeah. Yeah. I had a friend with Crohn's and it was like,

got a shit pull over. And it's like, gotta shit, pull over. And it's like, can it wait? Nope! And you see sweat start forming. And it's like, what's gonna happen if I don't get there in time? And he's like, I'm gonna shit in the seat. Surely you won't shit yourself. I'm gonna shit in the seat.

And he's like, he goes in the gas station or whatever, and we want to use the bathroom too, so we go across the street to use that bathroom. It's one of those exits where it's like gas stations everywhere. We're like, we're going to go to the BP and we're going to use that toilet because he's in there. We pull out of the BP heading back to

the racetrack, quick trip, whatever. He doesn't wait for us. He's in the highway running toward us. We pick him up in the middle of the road. He's like, go, go, go. What? What is it? He's like and we pick him up in the middle of the road he's like go go go and i'm like what what what is it he's like i was in there destroying the toilet and i heard the lady that works there and she said well my shift's over i just need to clean the bathroom up and i'm headed

home he was like and i passed her coming out the door. He was like, wait. I just had to run. I just had to run. It was just awful. And Tabes. That is the coolest guy of the week. And Tabes from last week has Crohn's. Yeah, he mentioned that. Oh, yeah, yeah, he mentioned that.

What is Crohn's other than having to poop a lot? It's just like all digestive and intestinal problems right it's some sort of a digestive issue or yeah isn't it like um one of those uh what do you call it when your body attacks itself um inflammatory thing yeah no i know i know what you're saying uh like autoimmune i think is crone autoimmune like your body attacks its own digestive system or something yeah i might be wrong on that but yeah but like it's so bad that like you people get like parts of their intestines and stuff removed so it's like yeah it's really serious yeah yeah i might be wrong on that but yeah but like it's so bad that like you people get like parts of their intestines and stuff removed so it's like yeah it's really serious yeah yeah i hope i never get anything like that i like to eat too much i like i like like really spicy food like

i've got some salsa right now that i can only eat like five chips worth and i'm like all right all right i'm done i'm done i like this uh i got this korean hot sauce right now that's made from like fermented soybeans and red chili powder or something that's good it's so fucking good it's called like gongcha or something like that i don't even know apparently it's very popular in korea it's like a table condiment uh but it's real tasty like i like spicy fucking foods and foods that are not good for your digestive system the asians are on point in that way like they if someone was like you have to eat mexican food for the next seven days and be like oh that's gonna suck after day one or like you have to eat just

barbecue for the next seven days after like day three that's gonna suck i feel like you have to eat only like japanese chinese like oriental style food for a week and be like hell make it three weeks like it's it's fantastic it's great the only downside to it is there's no dairy like no cheese or anything there's some eggs in that there are eggs dairy no they're chickens oh my god i'm just imagining a cow just like shitting out giant eggs just some the size of your head i don't know how i did that. All right. Now I've got mine. This half is about to lay a big lard. Just put about nine eggs in there.

Usually the crop's about seven eggs per sow, but we got one here. They just seem like breakfast food commonality. I don't know how I made that link. Maybe it's like a vegan thing in your head. Like vegans can eat some dairy and eggs. So their eggs and dairy are the same. Yeah, yeah. You know, you're...

Yes, yes. I'm trying to help you out here. Obviously, that was the connection I made. I was doing some sort of vegetative calculus. Goshwan, Korea Hussos. This looks pretty good. This is really stupid. Have you ever had...

This is like the second worst disease I've ever had. I don't know if this counts. Have you ever had your ear pop before and then you're congested and you can't unpop it? Actually, ear popping is something I'm extraordinarily good at. You mean like the pressure is building in your ear? Yeah, so the pressure's building and you can't really pop it because you're congested or sick.

Have you ever had that happen before? That thing Wings is describing that I can do remedies that... I really can't do that. I wouldn't make that up. It's so stupid to make it up! Oh, no, you're just trying to look cool. It's not cool at all! It's such a stupid fucking thing! Here, Kyle, Kyle,

I'm going to do a test. Close your ears. Now... Hey, Kyle, if you can hear this, say something. An important thing to... It doesn't make me deaf when I do it. It lowers the volume by about 40%, okay? It really does! I'm doing it right now, okay? Wait, do you hear a rumbling when you do it it lowers the volume by about 40 okay it really does like i'm if i'm doing it right now okay wait do you hear like a rumbling when you do it

very slightly yeah like the blood flow in your ears no isn't that what you're isn't that what you're actually hearing oh god i can do something where if i like i don't know if it's closing my ears or whatnot i can't do all i'm talking i guess but i do something where you it's harder to hear stuff outside because i would do this at concerts but when i do it i hear a really loud like and i just assume it's like the oh i wonder if i can do the same i think i'm flexing a muscle inside my head or like up there i'm trying desperately pressing it's doing compressing my the the tubes in my ears it's absurd to make such a thing up and it's not a superpower but there have been circumstances in my life it's absurd to make such a thing up and it's not a superpower but

there have been circumstances in my life where i wasn't wearing ear protection there was loud shit and i'd do it then yeah yeah yeah i would do that i do remember doing this in my sister's college graduation because they played the music they played was so loud that's actually one of my huge pet peeves i appreciate my hearing yeah but you can like i don't even know how you describe it but like yeah oh i totally agree with you i thought it was just like one of those weird things that like everybody can kind of vindicate it no i've never been able to do that i've been trying for quite some time now i think i cleared up my ears a little if i hear better if anything else um ears popped congested i was in new zealand and i had to take a flight from north island south

island hop on the airplane and i didn't really think much of it my other than i couldn't pop my ears but as soon as that airplane hit like five six seven thousand feet i'm like hey this is actually kind of uncomfortable like i can't pop my ears it's really annoying and by the time i got to 20 000 feet i was like wow this is actually really uncomfortable like i'm doing everything to pop my ears and then the next hour and a half was like the most excruciating pain i've ever been in with this ringing splitting horrible because i couldn't pop my ears and i had all the pressure built up i didn't know if my fucking head was going to explode like the fucking x-files that was really fucking bad holy shit but that is the worst i've i had to go on a business trip once for a flight and i had the

flu at the time and i i couldn't miss this meeting i had to go and i was like past the you're gonna you know the communicable stage of it and i had the exact and i was like past the you're gonna you know the communicable stage of it and i had the exact same thing we're like as it's taken off i'm trying to do like the well i bought a pack of trident and i'm chewing gum and i'm holding my nose and blowing and fucking nothing happened and then you feel deaf for the rest of the day have you ever had that where you get off a plane where your ears get pressurized and then like five days later after you've been acclimated to it your ear will pop and you're like oh my god you can hear the world it's like putting on glasses for the first time your ear pops you're like what is that i've been

missing it's like lsd it's like oh my god you guys can't just do a pop whenever you want one no i can't pop my ears that easily like it it might be because my sinuses were fucked and i had so many of those surgeries i don't know because i always do like the hold your nose and blow as hard as you can to try and is that how you do it or can you just like pop it i have a couple of methods one is like i move my jaw in a particular way and they open one is the nose pressurized thing um also i can get water out of my ears extraordinarily well. Really? Yeah. The way I do it is I just shake my head as hard as I can.

And that usually gets it out. I do a like jerk, but the key is it's not the down, it's the rebound. You go down it, like you pop it down and back up in a hurry. And, uh, I just spent, I guess, 15 years like surfing and competitive swimming and stuff. I just got wet more often than most people. And it's something you pick up. Yeah. Woody's our cool guy.

He was getting wet. I think getting wet means when you do angel dust, just so everyone knows. Is that really the saying for angel dust? Well, most of the people didn't know I was talking about that. Sorry. And now they do. I'm sorry.

When I text you about the secret plan later, we'll apologize for that. What does PCP do to you? Does that have any other names? Is that Angel Dust? That's what Angel Dust is, yeah. That one gives you super strength, right? Yeah, it makes me think of it.

Also known as Angel Dust. Distorted perception of sounds, violent behavior. Why would you want to do this drug? I want to say PCP is one of the ones that gun guys will argue you need a bigger caliber for. What if the guy's on PCP?

Get yourself a slug. It definitely is. What if he's on PCP? He doesn't know he's been shot. He doesn't care either. Yeah, 9 mil's not going to hurt him. You want to get spread. All right.

You got to get spread. The effects of PCP. The drugged person lacks any rational judgment. He feels no pain. He thinks of himself as invulnerable. He is often aggressive. He is willing to harm himself or others. Many of these stories involve self-injury,

broken bones, dislocated joints, stabbing oneself, or amputated body parts. Good lord. Fuck yeah. Maybe this thing about big calibers is right. Yeah. Remember when they thought that that guy who was eating somebody else's face was on

PCP and it turned out he was sober as a church mouse? Yep. They thought he was on bath salts, right? Am I crazy? Bath salts. Yeah. It was bath salts. And it turned out, no, just a crazy man who decided to eat another's face.

When I first heard that this guy became a zombie because of bath salts, I'd never heard of bath salts before. So in my head, I was like, oh, they probably mean baking powder. Like, that was a thing. I don't know why I was like, oh, let's just substitute for thinking. Dude, it's wrong. You walk into the kitchen, Jack's baking a cake, and you're like, no! thing i don't know why i was like oh let's just substitute for thinking the only way to stop a bad guy with bath salts is a good guy with baths yeah i i don't know about that one um but but yeah like i feel like what literally happened that year was an actual zombie was created, ate a man's face, was killed by the government. And then we as, you know, the simple fucking automatons that we are running about our lives in the society, we're just like, probably drug use, huh?

The government's always warning us about that. Back to work, boys! So then they made up a new drug and pretended that it does that yeah that was literally like like fucking derives fucking zombies fucking world war ii hitler illuminati cabal type stuff that's what was happening right there and it right under our noses right there on fox news where you can find truth justice the American way, fair and balanced. And we saw it,

we looked it in the eye, and we shrugged and said, drugs. Drugs. I only trust what Hannity says. Because he's not at all a bootlicker. That man is doing God's work. Tucker Carlson,

heir to the Swanson fortune, warning me about the elites is my new source of choice. He's heir to the Swanson fortune? Yeah, that guy's so fucking rich. Like the frozen meals? Are you serious? Yeah. That is too fucking funny, dude. I can't believe that.

He's super rich. The money that he makes at Fox News is inconsequential to Tucker Carlson. Mitt Romney's married to the Heinz ketchup lady. Really? I think you're thinking of John Kerry. Well, a Google search will tell us the truth. If I'm being honest, I don't care either way. Whichever one.

Ann Romney. She's a businesswoman and politician. Raised in Michigan. It's Control-F Hines. Teresa Hines, also known as Teresa Hines Carey, is a Portuguese-American businesswoman and philanthropist married to U.S. Secretary of State and long-term Senator John Kerry.

They look a lot like John Kerry. Heinz Ketchup is owned by Portuguese people? Portuguese-American businesswoman. That'd blow my mind. That's the best ketchup. You ever try to make it? Of course not. Like, I've made homemade ketchup. You're fucking up. They got it in a bottle

downtown. None of us have ever made homemade ketchup. It sounds like it's just you like i've made homemade ketchup you're fucking up they got it in a bottle downtown well i mean none of us have ever made homemade ketchup it sounds like it's just you that fucked up it's just me and like every time you watch a ketchup recipe on the internet they're like just so you know this has been perfected but if you're autistic as fuck and you're really and you like here we go you're gonna eat to eat some vinegar? It's tomatoes and vinegar, right? It's a lot of stuff. Tomatoes, vinegar, a lot of sugar in there. I heard that ketchup was invented

as a way, as like a thing to do with rotten tomatoes. So the tomatoes that like you couldn't sell anymore, they were bruised, damaged, all leaky, old, moldy. They would just stick in ketchup

and oftentimes ketchup was bad for you because the tomatoes were not suitable for human consumption that's hunt's ketchup though this is old school nowadays of course i know yeah i love ketchup it's my it's delicious it's fucking delicious you're about to say ketchup is your favorite food your favorite condiment it might be my favorite condiment i eat an incredible amount of ketchup here's a question i've always been scared to ask what is ranch because i noticed that sometimes when you go into restaurants they're like we make our own ranch blah blah wait what the fuck makes it i thought ranch was like the name of like some commercial product made by someone else but you

it's like eggs and buttermilk and something these all sound so bad for you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's buttermilk and sugar and salt. Oh, okay. Yeah, it's definitely, it's a blend of spices. It's buttermilk. And I think- What is ranch dressing made of? I think there's eggs in there too.

Ranch is fucking tasty, but blue cheese is the way to go. Do people ever make their own, I'm sorry, I just, I don't know. Do people make their own ketchup? Or is it always like- That's what I was just saying. Like you can make your own,

but it's a real fool's errand because it's been perfected and they sell in a bottle you know yeah so like so you never find like individual restaurants that like make their own ketchup or whatever it's always never come across no they won't do that it's not like spaghetti sauce where like if you want really good spaghetti sauce you make your own ketchup is one of those things where it's been perfected it's in a bottle just go buy it like if you want ketchup that's not as good as the bottled stuff, make it yourself. That's exactly what... And every recipe I've ever found.

Ranch is made of buttermilk, salt, garlic, onion, mustard, herbs, and mayonnaise. Or some other oil emulsion, like sour cream and yogurt. I don't like ranch that much anyway. It's so bad for you. Damn. Okay.

We're talking about food condiments, okay? We don't need healthy shit here. Yeah. We already know we fucked up by opening the sauce packet, okay? He's like, I don't like ranch. It's so bad for you. That's why I limit myself to barbecue sauce and ketchup. I'm not dipping my chicken nuggets in this ranch. Do you know how fattening that is?

Sorry, my bad. I'm going to stick with the chick-fil-a sauce which is totally not like fucking what mayonnaise and i have the recipe somewhere on my phone you know what the best condiment is wait wait is thousand island fuck out of here thousand island is is great on every sandwich have you ever have you ever had a frisco melt oh my god get this every here's like a, Destiny. Have you ever had a Frisco melt? Oh, my God. Get this. Here's a top secret trick if you didn't know this, okay? Ketchup and mayonnaise mixed together is 99% of every fucking secret sauce,

fucking Big Mac sauce, whatever, that's ever been made. It's like some variation of that or Thousand Island or whatever. I have all these screenshots of different sauces on my phone. Yeah? You live in the Midwest, or you lived in the Midwest, Destiny. You definitely had a nice Frisco melt from Steak and Shake. I don't think they have Steak and Shakes in... Do we have them in

Nebraska? Did they have them? Maybe I'm wrong. I thought it was a Midwest-South thing. I like the idea that if you swipe in Kyle's phone, you find embarrassing recipes. Oh, I looked this up. I looked this up and there's an article on March 12th. You find a lot of stuff, but that's in them yeah from march 12th apparently that's when the first steak and shake opened so yeah i've never been there you missed out i mean but they've got

a in and out and other shit in california is i've never been to in and out but i hear it's good now that i've been to california in and out oh i should have mentioned this earlier in and out is easily the most overrated restaurant i've ever heard of in my entire life. When I went to In-N-Out and ate my food after the first bite of that burger, I'm like, wow, this is very underwhelming. It absolutely is. Five Guys is the way. Look, if you want a good burger and you're going out to a restaurant, Five Guys.

You go to Five Guys. It's incredible. It's very good. Five Guys serves French fries in inhuman proportions. I get a small now and it's still like it's like like you know the lunch bag the brown one you may have taken to school as a child it's that many french fries yeah if if you get a large i always get the cajun fries because they put that cajun seasoning on them and it's delectable it's incredible spicy it's it's

wonderful but it's way too many like i get the little cheeseburger and the little Cajun fry. And it's like this many fries. It's as many as I could possibly hold with two full hands stretched out. I like to think right now Taylor's looking at his butt cheek to see if the bruise has changed since the start of the show. Yeah. I like to imagine that he's going into the freezer and getting like a Swanson dinner or something out and slapping it on his ass cheek for like three minutes before he comes back. Bag of peas, just a little bit of relief.

So I was thinking... Oh, I can't say it out loud. I'll text you later. I don't want to do anything that's going to make him feel bad. I got co-conspirators. We're on it. It's better if you're surprised when it happens.

He sure will be. I can't imagine what you're doing. I'm going to send some stuff to him. Oh. Well, that's probably just funny and not feeling hurting. I'm not looking to hurt the man's feelings. I'm not...

I didn't know where you were headed. Well, I'm not a monster't know where you were headed well i'm not a monster woody but i am gonna rub it in when it's inevitably loses you know i got a couple i got that that's yeah that's what this is about and you know i got a couple things i got a couple things uh oh they canceled my food yeah it's a shame have you guys spent have you spent a fair amount of time like traveling in other countries like countries what he has but one thing i will say and this is a non-fat american i am considering myself very average weight um i do appreciate american portion sizes uh i get kind of lost sometimes when i'm in european countries and they like they bring out like the sip of soda glasses

where it's like not even half of like what a can of coke would fit and it's like i'm gonna finish this before my food even comes out um they don't do free refills typically no nowhere oh that is a very very american thing yeah yeah it's an appreciated american thing i like it might make me fat but good mine i usually get water but when i do splurge arnold palmer is my new thing i feel like half lemonade half unsweet tea is only half a bad drink that's one way to look at it i guess come on compared to like a soda or a lemonade if you're gonna if you're gonna splurge it's if you if you go to uh chick-fil-a you can do half diet lemonade and half unsweet tea. Then you add a couple of Splenda to it,

and you've got a pretty nice drink. I'm not convinced. Do you need an undergrad in chemistry to create these concoctions? Yeah, just add a little sweetener to the unsweetened beverage, and it's tasty. I feel like if I'm at Chick-fil-A, I've already given up on the idea of trying to do anything

ultra-healthy. They have really good salads. Do they really? You ordered salad at Chick-fil-A, I've already given up on the idea of trying to do anything ultra healthy. They have really good salads. Do they really? You ordered salad from Chick-fil-A? I regularly get the salad from Chick-fil-A. It's fucking gay, dude. Wendy's has so-so salads on par with the rest of their so-so menu. I like the spicy chicken sandwich from Wendy's.

I like the baked potato. The french fries are just okay. I don't like their burgers. They taste bland to me, and they don't put mustard on their burgers for some reason. Their chicken fingers, not their chicken nuggets, are okay, and that's it. There's nothing else good there.

What do you think about Jack in the Box? I don't even bother. I think they're trying to do way too many things. They're trying to be a Jack of all trades. They've got way too much stuff over there. All right? But they've got curly fries, and curly fries are great. Curly fries should be adopted across the whole spectrum.

I imagine Dairy Queen to be the most sinful, wonderful thing, but every time I see the biggest calorie meals, Dairy Queen seems to win, so I never go to one. Here's what you want at Dairy Queen. It's called the Flamethrower Burger. It's a double cheese burger, two slices of pepper jack cheese. With the fried jalapenos. I think they might, but they've got this spicy

sauce on it that's legitimately spicy. A lot of fast food restaurants' version of spicy is like, well, it's a little hot, but what the fuck? I can't finish a Flamethrower Burger without taking a little break in between. It's fucking hot. Which place are we talking about again? Dairy Queen.

Oh. The flamethrower burger at Dairy Queen. Dairy Queen's good. I never go. I always worry it's too caloric. I don't get the ice cream. They're all caloric as fuck. Yeah, Dairy Queen wins whenever i look but i haven't memorized what exactly it's winning with right it might be winning with some sort of giant sundae nothing beats the the calorie battle more than like kfc popeyes churches all the chicken places

and they're all delicious well kfc is kind kind of shit. Popeye's is, yeah. Popeye's is pretty good, actually. And then Church's is number one. Getting a water helps a lot. If you get water to drink, that cuts out a lot of the calories. I have Pepsi. Yeah, I never get the diet drinks, but I bet you're right. Maybe I should open my... So, if you want to buy some at home, you want Dr. Pepper 10.

There's this version of diet drinks called... It's not for women. It's not for women. All right. So there's Diet Dr. Pepper. Why is it not for women? That was their marketing campaign. That was their marketing campaign.

It's a different sweetener they use to create a diet beverage. There's Diet Dr. Pepper. Then there's Dr. Pepper 10, which has 10 calories and uses a different sweetener. It's delicious. It's very good. it's the best diet drink that exists there's also uh root beer 10 sun kiss 10 ginger ale 10 like all of my favorite beverages come in a 10 calorie per can version and they're great i thought i thought for sure you guys were like yeah you want dr pepper 10 it's delicious but and this is a big one if you think you might be pregnant do not drink this you'll lose the baby it'll be born with no fingers or toes

it's not good radiation yeah uh not that it's not for women if you're trying to conceive stay off dr pepper 10 i don't drink any. I haven't had a glass of water. I can't remember the last time I had water. I have no idea. How do you guys all feel about sparkling water? Huge fan. I drank some of it during the show. I like filtered water from my fridge.

It's my favorite water. Do you not like sparkling water, Stephen? It's disgusting. Really? But I have a theory. How long have you been like sparkling water, Steven? It's disgusting. Really? But I have a theory. How long have you been drinking sparkling water? I just liked it because I used to drink a ton of diet soda, and I like the carbonation of it,

and so I just switched all my diet soda drinking to sparkling water because I just like carbonated drinks. I feel like I didn't try sparkling water proper until I was 27. So my only experience with sparkling water has been going to a soda machine, trying to get soda out and it's out of syrup and I drink it and it is not at all. Very bad, like mental association with like carbonated water.

Do you, what about you? What are your, I don't drink carbonated things very often at all. And I'm actually bad at it. I think that like, like Taylor, maybe perhaps a regular carbonated drinker is good.

I'll have two sips and now I have the hiccups. I think that, like Taylor maybe perhaps a regular carbonated drinker is good. I'll have two sips and now I have the hiccups. This is a painful, bothersome side effect of soda. It sucks. I like the way that one viral tweet from a couple years ago described LaCroix and that shit where it's like

this tastes like you're drinking sparkling water and somebody yells out the name of a fruit in the other room. Because there's just like no fucking flavor to it. There's so little. Do you get the hiccups if you drink carbonated beverage? No.

I think I do it wrong. I don't know. Are you one of the people that you put all the water in your mouth of the soda and you're swallowing gulps of air beneath it? That might be what you're doing. There's a a way to drink yeah like there's a way to drink where you know you're gonna have like a big burp or something like like from a straw i have the same problem huh okay well maybe you're just not meant for that i guess the lord puts us all on our own pads. Kyle, do we have a poster roll? Yes, we do.

Turo! I'm sure it's coming soon. I gotta open it up and then deal with the blinding light of my monitor. Turo is a peer-to-peer car sharing marketplace where you can book any car you want, wherever you want it,

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When you sign up for Turo and use promo code PAINKILLER at checkout, terms apply. Check out Tudor. Get yourself a very cool card. Sounds cool. Destiny, anything you want to tell the

people about how to find you? I mean, my stream is Destiny on Twitch. I'm Destiny on YouTube. Alright. There it is. PKA441.