Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #448

Episode Date: July 26, 2019

On this week's PKA, Kyle shares with the guys of his potential future supercar he wants to build with his dad which looks DOPE, Taylor recounts some woodland tales of chiggers invading his entire body and being a nuisance and Woody doesn't appreciate the styling the caricature artist did of him at a young age... all this and more on another sultry episode of Painkiller Already Adventureland Family.

pka 448 kyle a couple of sponsors tonight goat.com postmates smart mouth and uh yeah that's all folks yeah get right into it uh taylor we'll talk more about those great sponsors later but for now let's get right usually you have that little tag the little addendum okay yeah i'm mixing it up tonight i judge shows on how quickly they get into the content, right? I watch certain podcasts. It takes them seven minutes to get to something good. Dude. I hate you. I watch some gaming YouTube videos, and there's this one guy. I won't say his name, but it's like, dude, I skipped the first minute and 30 seconds of every one of your fucking videos

because you got to tell me about all this bullshit I don't care about and suck your own dick and thank everybody for liking the video last week. I'm disliking the video. Actually, tell me more about the suck your own dick topic and thank everybody for liking the video last week. I'm disliking the video. Actually, tell me more about the suck your own dick topic. You captured my attention. Don't give a fuck. Get in there. I want to hear about Easter eggs and PUBG or whatever the fuck I'm watching this for

at four in the morning. Let's go. And Taylor, to that point, tell me about your conspiracy theory. Well, it was... Go ahead. You've done some research for us. I believe you've looked into this. You've done the... Pages. Pages. Well, it was... You've done some research for us. I believe you've looked into this. You've done the pages.

Look into it. And pages of research. And, you know, I started off thinking this was dumb, but, you know, see if you wind up where I am by the end. I don't think I will. This is about...

This is about the moon landing. Now, it turns out there's a lot of reasons not just to trust it because, you know, the government is always against you so number one That flag waving there. There's no atmosphere on the moon. There's no air on the moon How is that flag in the photo waving should we debunk these or do you want an actual?

Try and give your answer. The conspiratorial site that I went to said that it cannot be explained. It absolutely can be explained. There's a wire in it, and what's happening is it's wobbling because the wire is in the top part of the flag and it's slanted downward, so it's doing one of these.

It's literally the moon's gravity sort of pulling down on the flag and the little thin wire they have in the flag to keep it out because it would look pretty fucked up. Really? Because NASA denied the existence of said wire. They did not. They did not. I made that up just now. I know you did. I know you did.

You have a lot of points coming to default. Good luck with this, John. One up, one down. Alright, okay, well, riddle me this. There was no impact crater from the landing. And we all know the moon is covered in a light layer of dust that kicks up and moves visibly anytime something lands. All of the dust near the spokes or whatever the hell, the landing gear, none of that's

been disturbed. There's no crater from the landing, as you would expect from a larger object like that. At least a small something. You wouldn't... crater's the wrong word. There's no disturbance... Yeah, I was gonna say, if there's a crater, we have... If there's a crater, then we fucked up the entire thing. But there's

no disturbance visible from the landing site. Not even dust kicked up. When they take off, shit flies everywhere. Well, is there a video of them taking off? Yeah. No, there's not because this was all filmed in North London, which I'll get to later.

So one to one now. Okay. I like that we all get to announce our own scores. I've got one too. I call the position NASA representative. All right. Well, I'll go on to point three, which is even stronger. Now, when you're on the moon, there's one light source.

That's the sun. Even NASA has said there is no external lighting. Because you know how people used to say, like, how did they take the picture of the lunar module from way over there? What it was is an extended arm to take a picture of itself. Like, that was debunked pretty quickly. The original selfie stick. Yeah, the original selfie stick, exactly.

This, you can see multiple shadow lines at a 90 degree angle on the legs of the lunar mobile and on the flag. And on the astronauts in some cases, not always, in every scene. I say scene because this is a film of fabrication.

So that means there was lighting being used almost like it were in a studio or something. So if there were the sun and... Don't debunk this. If there were a sun and... If there were the sun and an external lighting piece, that would lead us to believe this is a

fakery of sorts because if they were truly on the moon one source of lighting nasa even came out and said there was an external lighting so okay two to one okay no the lighting i've i've heard this lighting get deep dove into and the lighting is proof that it was true like that's not true that's not what i have written down i mean i have heard that the technology at the time can't duplicate the lighting they got it would be more difficult to do moon lighting fakery than it would be to land on the moon dude that is like the funniest thing to me that people use that argument when they're like it would be harder to fake the lighting or to fake this in some studio than it would be to go to the moon it absolutely wouldn't

be harder to do that it's very hard to go to the moon us and the soviets were duking it out but regardless woody i don't think that's a very i don't know that i'm going to take lighting expertise from a guy who sat in the dark for the first year of the show this isn't about this is from reputable yeah well nasa's own explanation for it is an uneven surface they said that an uneven surface on the moon explains that which i don't know i'll leave it up to our intelligent skeptic listeners to decide. Okay. It's two to one in one direction. We don't know yet. Okay. All right.

The Van Allen radiation belt. Do you know what the Van Allen radiation belt is? Yeah. All right. Take it away. That's the magnetic field that surrounds the planet. It protects us from the harmful radiation from the sun and from the solar system, from space in general. And once you pass through it, you're no longer under the protection of the Van Allen radiation belt.

And you're exposed to a lot of radiation. Well, and there's also a lot of radiation in that belt that's somehow held there because of the way the Earth's magnetic core reacts with it. I don't know all the science, neither did these people. reacts with it. I don't know all the science. Neither did these people. But, turns out that the U.S., that NASA sent covertly, before we sent that chimp, we sent a German shepherd. And in that Van Allen radiation belt, died. Burnt. Just given horrible cancers

and whatnot. And yet, the astronauts were able to make it through the Van Allen belt. And no other astronauts were able to make it through the Van Allen belt. You're telling me no other living creature has successfully done that. The dog died of cancer? Well, the dog died of very quick cancer. Really, really rapid. Like, you know, when you see a wild deer that has like those tumors all over its face, it was kind of like that, you know?

And what else did I write down? They gave it enough air to develop cancer. Shocking. It would punch right through this kind of radiation, right through the supposed protective aluminum interior and exterior of the shuttle. It's very thin. It's very, very thin. And the radiation, the teeny little tiny particles.

We all watch Chernobyl. That's where I get almost all of my knowledge of how this works. Me too. HBO miniseries. Yeah yeah i'll take a three to one on that no you know what you're right we'll tie it up it's two two two two in some direction there is an object in the reflection of one of the astronauts helmets i think it was aldrin or whatever the fuck uh or i guess it wasn't aldrin he wasn't there right or who was this buzz aldrin was the second one right yes okay Yes. Okay, the second supposed,

the Buzz Aldrin, renowned actor, Buzz Aldrin. Now, the object in the reflection of the screen that he had, there was a hanging object, an object that is not at all consistent with what you would have seen

on the moon at the time when you were landing. It is an object consistent with what you would see from suspended lighting on a set and you can see that clearly in the reflection as a mistake from stanley kubrick who i'll get to later in the reflection so if that's not hard proof that you can kind of see something in the reflection in one of those photos i don't know what is three to two all right i'm looking at their helmets i don't see any reflections you need to you need to find the one photo that kind of makes it look like that all right the mirror experiment we've all

heard that well there were mirrors put up there you know and now they can shine a light and a laser and see where we are and calculate trajectories because of these mirrors. Those mirrors were placed there in 1961. We have experiments in 1962, seven years before we supposedly went to the moon, doing those exact same trajectory experiments. So that has no bearing on the moon landing. How did they get the mirrors there?

From other means. Duh. No, I think I actually did read this. Apparently, you can do it without the mirrors in a different way. I don't know how that possibly works. A laser would help. Yeah, apparently we were doing some of that stuff in the early 60s. Not that that actually helps my point, but I'm taking the point.

Okay. The slow-mo walking. If you speed up the moon landing footage 2.5 times they're walking normally now when you're walking underwater and if someone were to film that and they sped it up one and a half times or whatever to get you to the normal walking candor normal walking speed it wouldn't look like normal walking because you're in water like it would be more labor to be more movement that's not what we see in the moon landing. We see what is effectively very slowed down normal walking. You can also make out little hints of wires holding them up. This is the most horse shitty of all of them.

Because I've seen them walk. And they bounce high. And they arc. And sometimes they just jump up and down in place for no particular reason. They don't do normal earth things at all. I'm telling you, man. That's movie magic that's hollywood magic point on this one because this one is the most horseshit of all all right you're right i shouldn't have put that one in the list because it gives you guys a free point that was that was a bad penalty kill on my part so uh here's an actual interesting one now there are no stars visible anywhere in any of those photos.

And the explanation from NASA is that the stars got washed out because of the low quality of the camera. The problem is, is that in decades prior, taken through the atmosphere on Earth, you can see stars pretty clearly, even with washed out, terrible cameras. And so what was their explanation for it? Yeah, it was just that it washes them out. Even the high-res pictures that they kind of try and construct from this event, supposed event, show that there are no stars in the sky. And so why is it that there are no stars in these photos? You can look all these up.

It's because they knew that if they were going to fake the moon landing, trying to get every constellation in the perfect spot so that it could be verified from every angle would be impossible. And so they just washed out the stars entirely and said, that's not true. And for any conspiracy, you need a good motive. And the motive would be to beat the Soviet Union in the space race. It would have been pretty humiliating if Kennedy in 1962 or whatever said, we will have a man on the moon in 1969 or before the 70s, hopefully I'm not dead. He said all those things. And it would have been pretty humiliating. The Soviet Union was ahead of us with rocket, with propulsion, with any other space word I can think of off the top of my head. They were all ahead of us. The no stars thing,

pretty poignant, if I do say so myself. I think the reason, my guess would be that there's a lot of light being reflected up from the moon's surface because of that I can't think of the name of it, but that dust is like super reflective. There's a reason the moon is so bright, besides the sun reflecting

off of it. It's reflecting off that really quite powdery soil it seems like I mean you can see stars when you're in the middle of the ocean and there's more reflectivity off of the water surface than there is off the moon I would think I would think not because it's you know a liquid that's sort of clear and more than in the snow in Antarctica, whatever. Hmm. Well, it's not daytime in Antarctica. When it's daytime in Antarctica, you can't see the stars. Well, this was like a lunar sunset, wasn't it? When they said they filmed...

I don't know. It was daytime. That's why everything's lit up. You get two questions in and I'm out of my depth. I don't like this. I don't like this. Stars are rarely seen... I did this quickly today.

Stars are rarely seen in space shuttle, mirror, and Earth observation photos, even photos taking at sporting events at night. The light from the sun and outer space

in the Earth-Moon system is at least as bright as the sunlight that reaches the Earth's surface on a clear day at noon. So cameras used for imaging subjects illuminated by sunlight

are set for daylight exposure. The dim light of stars was not provided enough exposure to record visible images. Once again, Taylor, stay away from lighting. What crackpot site is this from?

It's from Wikipedia. Wikipedia, ah, the well-known George Soros operation. Wikipedia. They're referencing the NASA Earth Observatory blog and P-Lot. I don't know what plot is.

P-Lot. People lying about the truth. One of the things that always... You know what? That's a point for Taylor. Alright, yeah. We're back in this. I almost want to skip the next one because it's just going to give you guys a point

it's a so one of them is the C rock if you look up the C as in like the letter C rock you'll see a rock that has like a perfectly etched C in it and the explanation that these people I mean the people I believe

are giving is that it's a set piece. You know, they had rocks A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, and they were moving them around to make sure they're in the exact right spot. NASA's explanation is that it was a stray piece of wire or twine that got stuck to the rock, which I'm not so sure about that. My explanation would be rocks do get hit in weird ways all the time, and sea is a pretty normal shape, right? One of the things that I've always wondered about and I've heard talked about, I don't know much about radiation either,

but it would seem to me that we're up there a lot. But during the moon missions in particular, we left the radiation belt and we shouldn't have had that protection of the magnetic field um but they always say that it's just not enough radiation to kill a human but it should be enough radiation to ruin the film yeah in the cameras um so that's one that's always been really interesting to me is like why didn't that radiation fuck up the film it's that is interesting i don't have that written down but i'll take the point it's not the details that get me on this sort of thing i i usually look at more

like holistic would they get away with this kind of thing it bugs me a little bit that no one has caught up to u.s technology from the 60s yet right it's almost 2020 and second place hasn't arrived at the finish line yet that's weird to me we didn't have that kind of lead to yeah all of our moon landings were during the nixon administration like that's kind of fine to 72 yeah like yeah we were able to do this when uh like one of our most corrupt governments was in place but not since if trump goes we'll know it's all fakery. That would be hilarious. Go to the moon. If he doesn't address from the moon, he's on the moon.

He's talking to his... He's got an extra large helmet so his hair can fit in. His space suit has an abnormally long tie. He'd be making jokes like, I haven't felt this light since high school. That'd be good shit. Alright, you guys get a point for the C-Rock. I'm skipping that too.

That's really dumb. Duplicate background. So if you look at the Apollo 15 mission prior when we sent a rover there to take photos or whatever, the background of the two, including the two hills and the landscape, are exactly the same.

Now, NASA's explanation is that the small size of the moon and the distances can kind of play tricks on you because of the horizon. But when layered over each other, the hills are the exact same distance away, even though NASA claimed that it was very far away from that initial site where that photo was taken by the rover. So. So what the fuck else did they say? Yeah, that's all I got on that one. Just look up moon landing duplicate background and and you'll find that I'm pretty sure we went man um you know i i and to woody's point i i don't think that it's not it's not that they haven't like caught up on technology i think it's just the expenditure like i think it's just so fucking expensive to go it's quite the boondoggle right

i mean does everyone know this term boondoggle in my experience it's like a a work trip that's really a vacation uh apparently we didn't get a lot of science from it maybe we had a lot of science from the achievement of going there coming back but the moon itself yielded just not very interesting yeah i think we got a lot of tech a lot of technology and a lot of discoveries that came about because we had to solve a problem getting there yeah yeah like it's like well we need some... Velcro, for example, is... Teflon. Lots of cool stuff, which apparently makes...

I don't know if you know this. This is not me making stuff up. Easy Mac. Teflon-coated pans. If you grew up eating Teflon-coated pans, it literally makes penises smaller. Really?

Yes. Well, I'm a cast iron man. Yeah, I've always... I don't know. Maybe I ate off Teflon as a kid. Who fucking knows? So just imagine how big I could have been. Wait, does it make you cancer?

I mean, it would have been an act of cruelty if my mom hadn't used Teflon. Oh, thank God she used Teflon. Where would I get my pants? Where would I get my pants? No, that's a true thing. You can that one um but i'm going but yeah i just think it's so goddamn expensive to do it like like um i want to say india maybe made a rover and went to the moon not too long ago and they said that it cost less to do that than to make i can't remember which movie interstellar it was like it was like much much cheaper for the indians to send their rover to the moon than it was for us to make the film interstellar

i don't know it's just sending a man up there and three men really you know to to the moon and then two landed on it i think alan shepherd was the guy who stayed in the uh the uh the orbiter craft whatever that thing's fucking called. That's the most technologically scary part to me. If you told me that I was going to be on this mission to go to the moon, the three of us, because let's just go with that

because there's three astronauts and they're like, all right, we're going to put you on this enormous rocket. It's the biggest rocket ever made by a man. We're going to blast you through the fucking atmosphere. You're going to rotate a couple of times.

Then see those guys with the Coke bottle glasses. They've been working some math out for a while and they know just when you should start using these. Well, you've got a little fuel, about as much as you could

fit into a scuba tank. You're going to use that to leave orbit and head toward the moon. And then, well, Taylor, you're going to have to stay on the orbiter. I'm sorry. We don't have a helmet that will fit you.

So you've got to stay up there. And Woody and Kyle, you're going to land. And then once you've done all your science shit, you're going to take back off and you're going to meet up with Taylor. That's where I'd be like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Woody and I are going to fucking land. And then we have to take off again in that thing covered in the gold aluminum foil. And we have to somehow

meet up with Taylor in outer fucking space in his garbage can vessel and like clamp up with him and then figure out how to come home. That's the scariest fucking part. Taking back off from the moon. That's what did him in in Interstellar.

It's the docking. Oh, well I didn't do it. That was the cool part. Docking. Isn't that where you put your dick up to a guy with an uncircumcised dick and you roll the skin onto your... They had to match the spin of the Interstellar docking. I remember there was some damage. That's what Aldrin and Armstrong were doing

before they stepped out. The robot's like it's not possible The robot's like, it's not possible. He's like, no, it's necessary. He's like, dum-dum, dum-dum, and he does it. Yeah, with no damage.

They had already had a huge catastrophe before that, so there was already like, the reason he had to do such a dangerous maneuver is because of the damage that had already been incurred from a separate incident. That movie made me cry so fucking hard. You cried fucking hard. You cried more than me, yeah.

Kyle's really enjoyed Interstellar. I didn't think it was that good. Oh, it's so fucking good. I mean, it wasn't bad. It just didn't enthrall me. It grew on me. Are there any actual credible arguments that we didn't land on the moon?

Because every single one of the things I was looking up and writing down, I'm like, I don't know fucking shit about this whole process and this seems seedy it seems like we went um and uh we definitely did right and it's probably our proudest moment as a country honestly it's it's pretty spectacular incredible that we actually did that shit i mean look at the cars that were around in 69 look at the fucking that what a telephone looked like in 69 what just name a piece of technology what a computer looked like in 1969 and then say all right you're gonna take this shit you're gonna go to fuck if we were going

today to the moon it'd be like i hope we got our ducks in a row we are going elon musk is saying he wants to go elon musk is saying he's going to go in two years which might mean four ish and he says that nasa says they can't do it and it's literally easier to go to the moon than to convince nasa to do it which i thought taylor would like it is it is weird to like to your point earlier buddy like japan or russia or none of them just thought like china yeah the americans did it we may as well do it just to show we can like apparently you know i don't think we thought there was that much to find on the moon i think we were just doing it as like a fuck you to the soviet union right i like how we i feel like we lost the space race, moved the goalpost, and said we won. We literally did.

First one into orbit wins. We actually have rocket in orbit three days from now. Yeah, orbit, child's play. First one orbiting six times. First one with the space station. First one on the moon. All right. Then they have a space station people living on uh no that that one uh that wasn't it we met mars the whole time

i disagree you know it's it's like really yeah because like like we did change the rules mid game that was a very third grade way for us to behave in the i think the club war. I think that their accomplishments were much more minor in comparison. It's like, ah, we got the first satellite up there. And you might think, oh, cool. I bet it's really... That's just a ball that sends back information. They just launched a fucking piece of metal

up real high. They did it before we did. They did do it before we did. But it's complicated to receive that, I don't know, D-error check check the signal it sends and then they sent a dog up there that poor fucking thing got cooked and then then they supposedly sent that yuri guy up there i don't buy it i don't i don't buy that i'm pretty sure that

i i watched this whole documentary that that it claims that yuri fucking burn up and they just hit they hit it and pretended like he made it back. And I could totally see the fucking Soviets doing that. I could see us doing that. There's pictures out there of all the Soviet high command people standing around Gagarin's corpse, and it's just like a shriveled up, burned crisp. It looks like a 40-pound dog you lit on fire. It's one of the

highest death rate occupations in the world astronaut yeah can't be i think it is okay because of the number of total astronauts though yeah oh yeah i'm not saying yeah but we haven't lost one in a while like the last yeah that one that one challenger explosion really threw the numbers up there was the one in like the last, when the space shuttle exploded. There was one post 9-11. Yeah. That's what I'm referring to. The discovery,

I think. Could be. The, when we, I don't know, we lost three or four or five astronauts or whatever. Yeah. I would,

it would depend on what, yeah, I would go to space. I think it's just a flat answer. Yeah. Now, now I, as far as going on some sort of Mars mission, I don't think I'd want to do that because like, that's going to be so fucking good call.

Yeah. Cause it's just, I don't have much faith in our ability to pull that off. And even if we did, it would suck. It's really suck. I think it's like, it's's it's at minimum like six months there and six months back and it's not like you could go there and then turn right around it's like all right in a year and a half the the planets will be aligned correctly again so it's only a six month journey back and not a year and two months or whatever the fuck it ends up being if you fuck

i saw the martian it's not a good scene there's a netflix um you know super fast kyle was right about teflon and penis length yeah absolutely yeah it's not a made-up i found like six sources i've trusted every word you've said ever since the salt epiphany rarely wrong so yeah i wouldn't want to go up there i wouldn't want to to be on mars like the living conditions are gonna suck there's i mean, there's going to be... It's going to be awful. You'd pull your phone out 10 different times a day for the first month trying to order Postmates?

You're going to let me bring my phone? You're not going to let me bring my phone? I'll be like Homer Simpson. I've snuck a bag of Lay's potato chips. Everybody looks over at me. Nah, it's not going to but if um if there was some kind of space tourism thing where you're just gonna go you're gonna orbit or you're gonna go to the space station which would be coolest i think the space station would be the coolest trip

because you get some moving around room you get around in there and maybe that canadian guy will play the guitar his guitar for you and you can piss in that hose or whatever and that'll be neat and i feel like canada has their astronauts up there more just for fun where it's like yeah we're part of the world like we're part of the team whereas like the russians and chinese and americans are ones research and everything i know that's not true because even the dumbest astronaut is leagues smarter than i could ever hope to be. Because like, have you looked at astronaut requirements? I haven't, but I assume they're high.

I assume they don't let any, you know, Tom, Dick or Joe waltz in there. Sometimes they do. Uh, when the challenger, I want to say maybe the challenger explosion,

there was just a school teacher on that ride. She won a contest. I think. Well, it was her name. Sally, right? Do you remember that?

That makes it worse. I didn't know there's a contest. Yeah. She, they name Sally, right? Oh, shit. Do you remember that? Oh, that makes it worse. I didn't know there was a contest. Yeah. They were like, she was the first and only winner. Yeah. She got the lucky box of Wheaties. Yeah. Got to go up into space.

Oh, that is such a tragedy. They buried her in it. Yeah. Did you watch that live, Woody? That was before Kyle and I were around. No, I was out grocery shopping and came back to discover that it was just replaying constantly on the television. Yeah, that was fucked. But yeah, I'd go.

It was a snow day. I'd go to the moon too. Because the moon is like a... So net positive in your world. Yeah, it was still a good day. It wasn't 9-11. 9-11 impacted... everybody's mood was down. Everyone was sad.

It was like, it was someone, even if you didn't know anyone that died, everybody knew someone who knew someone who died, who was impacted by this thing. It seemed like it wasn't okay to pay attention to sports anymore. They just weren't important. It wasn't okay to laugh. The sports anymore. They just weren't important. It wasn't okay to laugh. The Challenger blew up, I guess. It was Space Shuttle, whichever one it was.

It was like, oh, that's fucked up. What else is on TV? Yeah, it was pretty different between the attack and the accident. But yeah, I'd go. I'd go and do just about anything other than deep space travel, like something to Mars. Like that just seems stupid. I mean, I mean, it seems I wish someone would do it, but it's not gonna be fucking somebody like me.

I wouldn't make that decision. Yeah. But the moon would be cool as fuck. I'd definitely go to the moon because that's like, I don't know, four or five days there and four or five days back or something like that. Reading a relevant audio book. This is the premise of the book, and I'm going to ask you if you would want to be in this situation starts off current day it's called we are bob we are legion and uh they're the bob of or something anyway current day guy starts a software company sells it now he's suddenly rich doesn't know what to do with his money just starting like the next

phase of his life and buys cryogenic treatment is that what it is when they like save you cryogenic walt disney did yeah they cut his head uh he gets hit by a car so they chop his head off and freeze it well he wakes up oh and by the way there was a lot of other stuff he did to set himself up for success like he put his money in trust funds and had property. He was really ready to step into his next life, hit the ground running. That is not what happened. He woke up to find that the government was completely overturned. Now it's run by these faith-based people who say that corpsicles have

no rights and instead they're forced to do usually menial jobs until they go insane they're and they don't bring him back in a full body instead they take the current state of his brain sort of turn it into a computer program and then it just runs you know like apparently 90 of all mining operations were done by this one guy who actually loved mining in his previous life and now he just is a mining robot copied copied copied copied everywhere well our guy's job is to go into space explore and try and find a new planet for humanity would you want that that? No. That sounds scary and lonely. That's an episode of Black Mirror. You know what would be funny is if some whore

did the cryogenic thing and they just take her download and put it into every sex robot. I like the way you're thinking. She's just getting fucked 24-7 by a bunch of... Yeah, just a blowjob machine for the most undesirable future men imaginable.

But like Bob, she's perfectly suited to it and loves every second. Yeah. Oh, I love Dick. I love sucking cock. Yeah. I can't wait to do this forever. I hope the book ends with Bob going out and finding a whole race of beings who have evolved to a point where they are all digital now. And he tells them what they did back to him on Earth, and they all come back

and just destroy the faith-based Earthlings. Well, that's Macabre. Well, I won't spoil much. See, that wouldn't happen. If some shitty little goblin man showed up here, and we were way more advanced than him by some miracle how somehow he made it here, we wouldn't

be like, we're mounting an assault on the mean goblin men of zektar 4 we'd be like oh take him to barnum and bailey's like no but he would be on their level because he is they've evolved to the point where they're all digital they're they're some sort of you know they're they've left their biological bodies behind they're all machine folk now and somewhat some way or another and uh and he shows up and he's basically one of them and he's like yeah these these fucking goo but goo backs back on earth you know they force me yeah you know let's go get them they got so much stuff they've got so much

stuff it's a good book maybe yeah i it sounds It sounds interesting. I like dystopian stuff like that. I mean, the book sounds fine or whatever, but that sounds horrible to be put into that. I've discovered I like sci-fi. Now, I knew that, but I thought the sci-fi I liked was based on movies, right? What is The Expanse? Is that the recent one we've been watching?

Or Star Trek or Star Wars? These are like space cowboy movies and i thought that was the coolest thing but when you do sci-fi audiobooks suddenly they're diving into like intellectual pursuits and they're setting stuff up and they have moral quandaries the moral quandaries in star trek are laughably stupid right when wesley discovers what drugs are like or something like that um but the moral quandaries in audiobooks are fascinating and there aren't right answers there's just different variations of right and wrong depending on your own morality i'm digging it so apparently i like sci-fi audiobooks i think i'm i'm more scared of going really deep in the ocean than I am of going far out in space.

If it was like, all right, you got to hop on the James Cameron mobile and go down to the Mariana Trench and just look around. Or you can go to the space station and play guitar with this Canadian guy, talk about the Leafs or something. And I'm definitely going to space because I know there are no creatures out there. Whereas in the depths, I'll get like viscerally like palms sweaty when I watch those, uh, when you see the whole drone or whatever, go down there and there's someone sitting behind the big round glass and like any movement at all.

You're like, that could be the biggest thing ever. I don't know. There's nothing in space. What do you know? I mean, if there is, at least it'll be a surprise. I know there's something

huge and scary down at the bottom of the ocean. There's so many huge, scary things down there. I do not want to go down. There's that fish with the dangly thing. The dangly thing from Finding Nemo, right. Yeah. The male of that species, the anglerfish, it just swims up, bites onto the

female, and then withers away into a set of testicles. And so the woman fish will have like 10 sets of testicles, and she'll be like, I feel like this nut's the one I want today when she's making new anglers. Sounds like marriage. That's super alpha, right? She just swims around with a bunch of testicles from her victories. Yeah.

It's not even victories. These guys are seeking her out. Like, oh, i can't wait to to bite this female fish and then just wither away into balls yeah oh yeah yeah that's that's still pretty alpha that's the male's destiny it's a uh a signal of her desirability right you know if she's got 10 sets of testicles hanging off of her she's the the bell of the ball the bell of the balls yeah yeah i'm terrified of the depths um like uh even in any deep dark water yeah you know like like one of my favorite books growing up was uh 20 000 leagues under the sea uh and and it's fucking terrifying like like the

premise of like what could be down there. And you know. I love the Abyss. That James Cameron movie. That's a really fucking good one. I haven't seen that one. I bet it would spook me if it's an underwater movie. It's an underwater movie. They find that there's a whole race of beings.

That live very very deep below. And there's a lot of drowning sequences. Oh I hate that. Do you guys find that when you're watching movies like that. Where someone is having to hold their breath underwater underwater that sometimes you will be holding your breath with them yeah i do it when i'm scared to i don't know i was doing this acrobatic paragliding thing and you get towed up behind a boat and it's nerve-wracking because the things go one way the wings go in another way and that's the correct way i find myself like i don't

think i've taken a breath in the last 30 seconds like yeah i usually try to control my breathing in scary situations like that to stay focused and like not panic like a you know i'm like literally doing breathing exercises if it's something like that i didn't care for that zip line we went on up in the mountains oh really i was i wasn't gonna be a pussy about it or anything but I found that to be pretty scary I knew it was safe but I didn't want to do it pretty safe although I tried to slow myself down at one point

and the tips of my gloves got sucked into that pulley and I was like behind the pulley behind the pulley that's important you could have ended up like that guy and i remember i was like i just pulled however old i was when that movie u571 came out that submarine movie and when they're there's one scene where they're like boom boom

like having to pull the chains really really fast through this thing and the guy like one guy's on one side of the chain the other guys in the other they're moving it really fast, one guy's on one side of the chain, the other guy's on the other. They're moving it really fast. And one guy gets his hand sucked up into it. Yeah. And he's just, oh, oh. And I remember in the theater watching that at, like, 13 being like, oh. Oh, fuck. Yeah. The subs are dangerous.

Let me find this Netflix movie we watched. I can't think of what it is. It's this Netflix movie where they go to this island where it's, like, this religious cult. Netflix Island. I remember telling my parents that I wanted to learn to tap dance. The Apostle. Because I had watched so many World War II Navy movies that involved tap dancing

that I thought it would be a useful skill in case of a war. We're going to kill all of the American bastards for Chairman Mao. Except him. he danced real good they were just on the ship in the submarine there were so many dancing sailors back in the day like this is what world war ii propaganda movies look like in america dancing sailors everywhere have you seen apostle on netflix i have not i'll have to look it up it's pretty fucked it's pretty fucked um it's i don't know what the time period is i would guess it's like early night early 1900s very early like maybe

1905 i don't know 1915 somewhere in there you really i don't if they do give a date i don't recall and this guy is boarding passage on this uh this boat to go to an island where his sister is like lost contact with her he pulls a switcheroo with his ticket with another guy on the on the way there because he's worried they might like know that he's not supposed to be there because everybody else is like they got like their weird bibles and stuff and they're all excited to go to the island and he's just sneaking in to get see what's up but when he gets there they're like tickets please and like when they see the he did the switch route with the other guy so the the switch route guy they take his ticket and they're like seize him and they just they just take him off and you just hear screaming and just you't even know what they do to him. And he's like,

fuck! Probably rape him. I'm glad I swish-a-rooed that fella. And so at one point they're all in sort of like, it looks kind of like a motel. There's like a hallway full of doors. And he notices one night when he looks outside well they give him a jar right away here you go here's your jar and he's like thanks I almost brought my own what was I thinking and so that night he looks out the hallway and everybody has placed a jar of blood outside their door and he's like the

fuck and he looks at his jar and he's like he goes and gets the neighbor's jar of blood he takes like half of his blood he's a cool guy of the week so far that's what i would do he's like fuck all that nonsense this is the 1900s like a tetanus this is no good it takes a little that guy's blood and then you don't even know what they're doing with the fucking blood and then it's it just gets creepier and creepier and this religious cult is nonsensical did he steal all the blood or split it with the neighbor he split it with the guy okay split it with the guy yeah it would make the other guy look he didn't he didn't like ruin the other guy's day by taking all this blood or whatever but like he

keeps seeing creepier and creepier shit. And finally he meets the apostle or whatever, the head honcho. And they're in this church. And he's talking about how they ran us out of here and they ran us out of there. But now we're on the island and this is paradise. But there's a nonbeliever amongst us. You five step forward. He's like the five who just have shown up,

and he's one of them. He's got them on their knees in front of him, and he asked the first guy, and he's like, what's the third parable of Pericles or some nonsensical bullshit from his made-up religious book? And the guy just starts spouting this shit off.

He knows it. He's fucking quoting this made-up religious book, and our boy is fourth in line to start quoting some shit, it he's fucking like quoting this made-up religious book and our boy is like fourth in line to like start quoting some shit and he's like reaching for his blade in his pants he's like i don't know none of that shit i should maybe i should have been reading last night he's like palming his blade well they get to the third guy third guy also doesn't know shit he comes at the leader with it with his own knife, our boy stops the killing, and they kill the fucking third guy in line. Turns out, there were two people there that weren't supposed to be.

And our boy has saved the apostle's life. And that other guy had bled into a jar the night before, because he didn't think about it. That's why it was slow. He has elevated himself in the eyes of the apostle. He's like, what is your name son pete pete the great all right you have heard yourself a seat at the table and so now pete's like and so i don't have to say the catechism then okay so the fifth parable go on go on so that all goes away so now he doesn't have but but like there's a part later on i'm not going to spoil too much where they have this crazy like people grinding device and a person's being has like hooks like in their palms and it's like dragging him into this thing that's like a people shredder with like gears they're turning against one of another they're just claws

it's some rough stuff i i highly recommend apostle it's not the apostle it's it came out last year i think okay that's new i mean it's not an old film yeah i watched it with a few friends and we were all a little disturbed afterwards you know we we um we were we were on like a horror kick watching a few scary movies the next thing i gotta watch and i'm gonna get some friends to watch it with me i I really need a girl here to cling on to because I'm so afraid of the movie, is Hereditary. I've heard of that one.

I should watch it. What's it about? I don't know exactly what it's about, but it's got this weird little girl in it. And I read some Reddit comments where they talked about how fucked up it is. So I'm going to have to check that out. Is it on Netflix also?

I doubt it. I doubt it. I doubt it. I'll probably, but Apostle is, and if you want a good scary movie, it's on there. And it's not like Warlocks and Demons necessarily as much as it is. People are fucked. People are fucked.

There's a couple of scary torture devices. There's a lot of murder, a lot of death, a lot of torture. It's dark. I need to watch Apostle and Hereditary. I'm always looking for good horror movies. I love horror movies. I'm blessed that I don't have nightmares.

I don't have nightmares either. Not necessarily about... I can watch a scary movie and then I don't have a nightmare about that scary movie. I don't think I have that going on. Every so often i'll think about it afterwards though i dream about much darker things you know what was scary for me um supernatural no no no what the freak is that uh it's the it's all paranormal activity it is paranormal activity i don't know how you got it from those clues yeah that's all i needed kyle

i'm thinking of something that i'll describe poorly oh it's this movie this is why i'm good at code names i don't need much yeah it doesn't does it so yeah paranormal activity uh that one kind of i don't know it just got me thinking it's it's the they made non-scary stuff scary oh yeah did the hose near on the by the swimming pool move a touch you know now you're freaked out now hoses are scary the scariest part to me um the two scariest parts i think of the first paranormal activity which i think by far is the scariest one for sure is when um you're getting a bit well all right three scariest parts one of them is when you're watching the fast-forward footage and the girl's just standing over him sort of swaying because of the fast

forward you know and she literally stands over him you watch the time stamp for roughly two hours and 45 minutes or something like that you're like fuck that's fucking creepy and then like they put the baby powder on the floor and the footsteps are like cloven hoofs like goat feet have walked into their fucking room that night and then the most tense part of the whole fucking movie to me when he goes up into the fucking attic with nothing but a zippo lighter or some shit for light and he finds that burnt photograph of her as a child that shouldn't even fucking exist on this planet anymore because the reason it's burnt is it was destroyed in a house fire when she was like eight and she's a grown-ass woman now and she's like that that shouldn't even exist and i'm pretty sure right at that moment the thing grabs her and

starts dragging her down the fucking hallway that movie scared the piss out of me i will say the zippo part was a bit of a trope right like you know we're going to explore dark minds we have matches three we have a zippo notorious for good even lighting i need her to pull out that one million candle power light that's that pistol grip and go whoa oh dude those things are no fucking joke i know one of my buddies we were over at his parents house and we were like 15 and we were we were all doing what 15 year olds do fucking around he was like hey it was like two in the morning he's like come out to the garage my dad got something cool we're all like okay he goes out there and it's a two-handed like a gatling gun style flashlight and he's like now guys do not look into this

do not look into this he turns it on and the amount of light that came out of this the beam like he was shining it at trees in his backyard it looks like daytime yeah like you could see through the things he like how much is they it it must have been thousands of dollars they were a very well-off family and he uh he shined it at at someone it wasn't me not in their face just on like their torso from like three feet away and within a couple seconds the guy's like oh stop it's hot it's too hot yeah it was a flashlight so strong he could burn it. He pointed it up in the air, and it makes Batman's symbol look like a flaccid cock. It wasn't just a, oh, there's light here, and then a little bit of mistings of light,

and then a sign. It's pure light, like God's coming back level of light. It blew my mind how bright it was. When we went out to Texas to do with that millionaire guy who's got the big game ranch, he equipped us all. And most guys have enough equipment for maybe themselves

to be fully decked out and maybe one other. I'm talking about guns and lights and ammo. And that other guy has version one of what you wanted. Like, oh, it turns out there's a better flashlight.

Yeah, that guy's the rough draft. Perfect. He's got the level four in Call of duty like equipment going like well this one didn't come with a red dot you know it's this guy has enough to equip everybody and one of the things he equipped us with were these flashlights like i'd never seen before like like i grew up with the pistol grip flashlight that's it's big almost like car headlight on top and a pistol grip and you plug it into a 12 volt battery and it's like between one and two million candle power i don't know what that is in lumens it may be one to one ratio actually it doesn't matter it doesn't help me clarify anymore yeah i don't know what that is in photo units

is it really really bright i'm not sure how many really's to illumine. He had these crazy flashlights that, like you said, it wasn't even a yellow light. It was a white piercing light that sort of turned everything to daytime and had this shown forever. And they were very, very heavy. Like the head of it was real big, and then it was very long.

Like you could totally beat a man to death with it. it was it was like the big five four or five cell mag lights but much cooler like like it was it was knurled all around instead of smooth and and and just 20 times more powerful than any mag light ever do you guys carry a flashlight with you all the time no i have one in my car but i don't carry one with me now it's in my pocket all the time i could show it yeah i uh i used to always keep one on my key, but I don't carry one with me now. It's in my pocket all the time. I can show it. Yeah. I used to always keep one on my keychain. It's one of those little squeeze and you get...

My lights have become amazing now. This thing is USB chargeable. It's got a couple little brightness levels. Brightness isn't going to translate into a thing. It also bends like this, so you can set it down and point it at your thing. That's pretty handy and yeah i bet i use it every day i bet i use it average once a day and part of it is maybe just age because i'll be like like you know when something's written and it's the same color

like you know this like slightly raised like if something were made in china and they'll just be like a stamp or something every now i need to read that serial number i need to read something flashlight helps me get that done like you know poorly stamped psi ratings on a tire flashlight makes that shit stand out and uh yeah flashlights have become amazing mag lights were the standard i've told the story before i once saw a guy change the tire on a a Jeep using a mag light as a jack stand. Like they had their shit together. It was good. Now mag lights are bullshit. Who wants an 18 inch long D cell powered, not very bright flashlight.

That's it's not good. They miss the boat. These little things kick ass now and they'll light up my backyard. Yeah. I bought a mag light when I moved in. So I'm like, I should probably have a big flashlight for in the house. And I got it, put the D cells in and shone it in my downstairs when it was nighttime and all the lights were off. And I was like,

oh, if something goes down, this isn't going to cut it. Unless you need a club. Yeah, I'll need a club with it. Speaking of other handy around the house tools, i noticed a couple spiders crawling around in my workout unfinished area downstairs and so i got a bunch of sticky traps that you like lay where you think like up against the wall where you think the

spiders or the bugs are walking and then they get stuck and die and i was i like i bought way too many of them because i was gung-ho and so i like put them all down there and those ones by the way doing great like i'm in missouri so the brown recluse thing here is real we have so many brown recluse every single house in this state has a brown has a bunch of brown recluse in it they're like they don't really care about you like they try and avoid you that's why they're called a recluse in it. They don't really care about you. They try and avoid you. That's why they're called a recluse. But also, anyone out there who notices a brown recluse on a sticky pad or anything, they play dead.

So don't touch it. Don't do anything with it. If it's stuck, it'll pretend to be dead until it's not. Are you ever worried that one of them's going to get in the ear of your headphones? No. I'm not afraid of stuff like that. It doesn't bother me. You should be. you should be you should yeah you should didn't you hear about that guy in you know fucking minnesota

but anyway i crawled into it i had so many of them that i'm like well i'm not i just i got to use all these right now and so i like started going around and like doing a little foldy do and putting them in other rooms throughout my house and i was in i was in my bedroom and i wanted to put it over to the side somewhere just to see if i would catch anything and it's just a big flat piece of you know sticky with the tear off sheet and then once you tear the thing off you take it and you kind of fold it but it's kind of annoying to do that because like i touched it and it gets all over your fingers it's not nice and i i peeled it off and got my finger stuck a little bit and while i was surviving experience taylor i know and while i was while i was freeing my finger the thing fell and i was like oh in the middle of the air it goes boom face down on my carpet with my the sticky ass side down on there and so i tried to like

pry it up it's so strong that like you know when you pull on carpet you can see it raise from the boards a little bit it was doing that and to such a point that i was like i was lifting it up and taking like scissors and trying to like cut the least amount of of like threads of carpet out of it because it wouldn't come off like when i mean if i tried a razor blade like a flat one where you could shave well i didn't have you around so i was just like trying to snip the littlest bit because if i tried to just gung-ho it it would have tore the whole whole thing out i think so the fuck do you have a scalpel for scalping all right well oh speaking of medical devices uh how's the tea any update i haven't called them i haven't called

them i've seen a ring today he's been too busy for the last nine business days something like that at least maybe more maybe maybe 15 yeah i just haven't called them they didn't call me back so i think it's just bad news i think i just didn't make the the cut or whatever because if they they want their money yeah right yeah these are people like if the range i think is 300 to 900 and you come in at four they'll be like you look better at six yeah yeah i i will call them i've been meaning to i've just been my sleep schedule's been ruined for one thing. PUBG came out with a new update. And the backstory. Does that matter to you at all?

Not a ton. It's neat or whatever. It would have been cooler if it had been there from launch or whatever. But yeah, it's kind of an interesting backstory. I mean, it's kind of a trope. You know, it's this guy's... It's sort of like Saw. I guess the guy... It might have been that island like he

experienced a war and it was difficult to survive and he became obsessed with survival and now he drops i don't know with 99 or 100 people on this island and this sees who's the best at surviving that's his yeah if i'm making me yeah that's that it seems to be pretty much what's going on yeah i don't care nearly as much about that as i do all this you know this this shit they're adding you know they've added a lot of stuff um this weapon balance stuff they added a new armor personnel carrier vehicle that's really fun to play with i wonder if fortnite like how long will fortnite be the top twitch game oh i don't know it it appeals to that younger audience. I think that's a good thing if you want to be huge.

Plus, it's free. I think that's huge too. PUBG is $15 or $25 or something like that. I really don't remember. If I only had Fortnite to play, I just wouldn't play a video game. I just don't care for it. It's not for me at all. I don't like anything about it's not for me at all it's not it's not i don't like it anything about it and it's not i'm not good at it i like it when people fortnite in rust like they run around with some walls and drop them and use it as the cover i think that's neat b chills is really good at that yeah um yeah there's a few people who are excellent at that they build so fast it's it's it's kind of hard to build in rust quickly and efficiently and accurately.

It looks hard because you go to put a wall down and it tells you no most of the time until you get it in just the spot. Yeah, and you have to build foundation and then the wall on that. And then you have to switch to a hammer and upgrade both of the things to something better than twig. Because twig is like, well, twig is what twig is. You want it to be at least wood but preferably stone or uh it's it's a whole thing yeah i rust i rust makes great video content games that appeal to me lately though are ones that play in like 15 to 40 minute chunks yeah that's pub g you know pub g would fit except that yeah my issue with pub g and it's the issue

i had with csgo for the longest time i don't want to suck like i don't want to walk into a game and just get butt raped by people who've been playing this for the last couple years i mean that that that's going to happen there's different ways to play the game i bet i could put together a squad that might carry me to some sort of level of success and it's it's going to happen. There's different ways to play the game. I bet I could put together a squad that might carry me to some sort of level of success. And it's easier to carry people in PUBG than most games because they get knocked out and you just revive them. You pick them back up. And if you stick with a Thunder Buddy, then as soon as you get knocked down, he can get you back up. Or he can defend you so someone doesn't finish you off right there.

Me and Mike Tyson getting into fist fightsights acting like we're both helping yeah you're like you're like gretzky and his brother yeah best best duo ever they do yeah they lead the league in like brother goals or something i got three oh nice uh but yeah um pub pub g's been cool they a lot of updates and they're adding even more they're at they're they're really finally fleshing the game out quite well um if they if they'll just take the goddamn red zone out of the game i'd be so happy we hate that shit so much nobody what that means is that when the map gets smaller no no that's the blue zone um that's where it like continually compresses you fool the red zone

real tired it's these random uh random bombing zones so like randomly for no apparent reason it'll put a red circle somewhere on the map and then bombs will just start raining down like artillery fire and you got to get indoors and it will it's so loud like i've got my game turned up loud already but income like if car sounds are here at like a 7 out of 10 is the kind of the loudest thing in the game the bombing the artillery fire is like a 25 or something it's like i mute everybody mutes the game we just mute the game and we sit in a corner for 20 seconds or whatever it takes for the thing to go away does it kill you much again if you're in it it'll kill you uh it'll kill you pretty pretty even if you're inside but i guess i'm asking is it easy to avoid like do you find it to be a big problem it's just annoying okay you know like there are some times when like you're running

to get to safety to like you're you're out in the blue zone it's it's melting you to some extent and you have to stop every three or four minutes and give yourself a syringe to keep going and all of a sudden there's a huge red zone right in front of you and it's like am i going to risk going through bombing zone or am i going to take the long way around and melt even harder and it's it's just it's just it takes away from the game it doesn't add anything to it everybody hates it the thing i hate most of multiplayer games is dying when it's not your fault i've said this for a decade now oh yeah and i wasn't sure if it fell in that category or not it doesn't add anything to it. Everybody hates it. The thing I hate most in multiplayer games is dying when it's not your fault. I've said this for a decade now.

Oh yeah. And I wasn't sure if it fell in that category or not. It absolutely falls in that category of just an annoying thing that shouldn't be in anything. If they added lightning strikes like literal Zeus lightning strikes where the character just died

and it wasn't their fault it'd be the worst mechanic ever. And that's similar. Yeah. PUBG used to have a lot of that stuff where you just randomly explode and it was kind of charming. Like the vehicles they hadn't figured out vehicle physics yet. And that's similar. Yeah, PUBG used to have a lot of that stuff where you just randomly explode. And it was kind of charming.

Like the vehicles, they hadn't figured out vehicle physics yet. So like, if the car bumped another car just right, it would just start vibrating. And you'd be like, ugh. Boop. Like, if you got into one of these vibrating cars, they just randomly explode. Or like, if a car went into a wedge type area where like it's in there but it's not supposed to be in there it just starts shimmying and shaking like it's possessed and then taking damage maybe

yeah it's exactly yeah it's it's it's clipping into a wall or something i used to have a lot of shit like that but they got they got it running pretty fucking well now like like it's if it had released like this it would have been a gargant running pretty fucking well now like like it's if it had released like this it would have been a gargantuan game it was already huge but it's still one of the most played games out there but i think they're doing well with their first mover advantage it i describe the situation like this you know you got a 20-sided die you hit a 19 you don't second guess why you didn't get a 20, I think. You'd be pretty happy. Things went okay. You stick with that.

I think they moved the guy who created it to some sort of bullshit position, like czar of creativity or some nonsense. Chuck Liddell's job. Yeah, pretty much. That's pretty much what happened. And now he's on a different team, so he's not even making any game decisions. Things have gotten better. Things are better now.

Stuff's actually happening. They're fixing things. Little things like they added tracers to the crossbow, so now you can see where your arrow's going. You can actually use the goddamn thing. I wonder if he got really rich. Yeah. At Cisco, people don't know.

People don't think of Cisco as a hugely successful company, but it was like the Apple of its day, or I don't know what's skyrocketing right now. It became second on the stock exchange. Anyway, managers would have classes on how to motivate people that aren't motivated by money anymore. How do you get the most out of a staff when everyone working for you is worth millions? I thought that was a really interesting business problem to to crack you guys get anything on prime day zero i didn't even know it happened jesus i uh i looked around i didn't see anything i wanted you know like like

and i what i did see was some bullshit sales it was like like i just bought that kitchenaid mixer i think it's like 265 or something like that for a k KitchenAid mixer. I think it's like $265 or something like that for a KitchenAid mixer, something like that, depending on your color preference. And they were like, KitchenAid mixer, $268, was $497. I'm like, no, it wasn't. I bought one two weeks ago, you fucking liar. Are you familiar with Camel, Camel, Camel? Is that one of those sites that shows what things used to be?

So you can see if things are actually on sale? Yeah. Anyway, if you're watching this while you're sitting in a browser, check out camelcamelcamel.com. Go to any Amazon-like item that you're looking at. Post in that URL on camelcamelcamel, and it will give you its price history. So it's hugely valuable on Prime Day or if you're christmas shopping they pull the kind

of shenanigans that kyle just described all the time and you get to see like if you're being ripped off or not or if it really is a sale and what's up so my experience with prime day is that if amazon makes it i don't know if they still make phones but they make the is it alexa is that who their person is and um you know they make a couple kindles and shit like that that stuff is on genuine good sales and you might be interested if you want that um but if you're just buying like i needed a new cordless impact wrench then it's not going to be on real sale yeah it's pretty lame uh but i didn't see anything i wanted at all and that's saying something because i like to online shop but i didn't see i didn't see shit so i didn't get anything yeah and speak uh oh yeah yeah go for the yeah

yeah i'll throw one in there i want to watch some of these white trash people fight it out okay if you're buying sneakers online there's a good chance the shoe you're looking at is fake how can you be sure it's real wellat.com is the safest way to buy and sell authentic sneakers online. And I just scrolled way too far. They're the largest marketplace in the world for authentic Yeezys, Jordans, and over 600,000 sneaker listings. They've made the whole process frictionless and trustworthy. They do this by only accepting sellers with the best reputations and verifying all sneakers to ensure their authenticity for buyers. Every detail is inspected from the stitching and color to the size and weight. GOAT certifies that every pair of sneakers on their

site matches match exact factory specifications. With over half a million sneakers on the platform and 10 million users, you won't find better prices for verified 100% authentic sneakers anywhere. find better prices for verified 100% authentic sneakers anywhere. Find the perfect 100% authentic sneaker at GOAT.com slash PKA. That's GOAT.com slash PKA. You'll also be supporting us here at PKA

and we appreciate that. So go right now before the sneakers that you want are gone. Go over to GOAT.com slash PKA. G-O A-T. Go. Is that part of the read? No, but it should be. This episode of PKA is also brought to you by a company we have a lot of personal

experience with. Far too much, if I'm being honest. Thousands and thousands of dollars worth of experience. Postmates. It could be either one of the next two, really. Well, Blue Chew doesn't get that expensive. You know what's great about eating your favorite thing? It's your favorite thing and you're eating it. You know what's not so great?

Getting it. And the only fast things that are for delivery are not the things you're craving. Introducing Postmates, the app that adds a delivery option to all of your favorite restaurants. Imagine anything you want to eat delivered. You don't have to drive, park, or even talk on the phone to order. Just download the app and order. 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. Postmates will bring you what you want within the hour.

You can even see where your food is and track your driver. Forgot to get eggs or milk? No problem. Craving a tasty burger? Check. Looking for the perfect bottle of red wine or a summer beer? Order up. Postmates is your new long-term munchies booty call. For a limited time, Postmates is giving you $100 of free delivery credit for your first seven days. So start free deliveries, download the app today, and use code PKA. That's code PKA for $100 of free delivery credit for your first seven days. So start free deliveries, download the app today, and use code PKA.

That's code PKA for $100 of free delivery credit for your first seven days. Save the hassle, get the food you love fast at Postmates with code PKA. Check them out. They're always adding new stuff to my Postmates. They're always adding new restaurants. That's the nice thing about it.

I'll log in sometimes just to see. Just to see, like, we've got some Thai food coming in. Do we? I do. There's the nice thing about it. I'll log in sometimes just to see. Just to see. We've got some Thai food coming in. Do we? I do. There's a new Thai restaurant. They haven't updated it yet on the site. I can't see their menu yet. Are you excited though? I love Penang curry. I love Penang curry.

I'm hoping it's legit. What color is it? Penang curry. Is it red? Isn't that one of the yellow ones? Hmm. To me, it's just like rice and chicken and all those vegetables i think it's a yellow curry it might be green curry it's definitely like it's really fucking spicy i like all the different kinds of curry it's i don't mind crying and having a runny nose in the privacy of my own i'll blow i blow if i'm not blowing my nose halfway through this meal, something has gone terribly wrong. Yeah.

That's how I, that's how I feel about Indian food. I don't have hiccups for some reason. What kind of tie is this? Yeah. I love that shit. Kyle just doesn't like blazing wings at B-dubs.

That's it. Everything else spicy, you're good. Those were outrageous. They are really. That was so funny. I can picture in my mind's eye because I was sitting

right next to you and we were passing around all those little things and you were not even looking at them. Just kind of out, out, out, out. A big pile of just a menagerie of wings and then you take one bite and oh, oh. No, I ate the whole thing. I downed a whole. They were boneless wings.

Bite-sized wings. I ate the whole wing. I know you did whole... Yeah, they're bite-sized wings. I ate the whole wing. I know you did. They're bite-sized wings. It was exactly... Woody sees the conundrum here. They're at least two bites. I just... If it's that spicy, it could be a three-biter. Piece by piece.

It was way beyond the level of spiciness that i would ever be comfortable with eating it was some fucking hot ones type shit it was just awful it was so bad it ruined the night i went in there starving like i don't think i'd eaten that day or maybe just a little breakfast and we played paintball or something and i was just like i'm gonna kill it i want some of those blue cheese chips i want to i want i want want this. I want that. I want 20, 30, 40 fucking wings. Let's go. I got maybe two wings in me, and one of them was that blazing wing, and it was just like.

Taylor, did you think it was that bad? No. Yeah, I didn't either. It's the hottest wing there. It's so bad. I had more than one of them. It didn't taste great. It was just one of those flavors where it's like,

oh, they're just trying to be really hot. The best ones are the one directly below Blazin', which is wild, which is just really hot buffalo. You can still taste buffalo sauce, which is what you want on a wing, and then Mango Habanero, which is somewhere else in there that's still pretty spicy. Mango's nothing.

Yeah, Mango Habanero's nothing. Yeah, I like that one. And the hot is like, that's what i like i like i like above medium but below anything that has a scary name like that's where i like to be i want to be hot just regular hot if there is like a one to ten scale and what you normally find in wings i enjoyed like zero all the way through eight and i don't usually have tens that knock me out the way that one seemed to get you but they're just not what I want. I like between probably 6 and 10.

I like it very spicy. Oh, I like a sweet wing sometimes, too. It doesn't have to be spicy. Oh, I was talking about before you started the ad read and I went to the bathroom. I saw a potential candidate this past weekend for cool guy of the week. Now, I went to the zoo with my girlfriend and yeah real life person that i saw just in passing i i was at the zoo with my girlfriend and another couple and we were just hanging out walking around and this was right as we arrived so we

were walking towards the fucking penguin exhibit or whatever where we were supposed to meet him and at the entrance to the st louis zoo there's a bunch of little you can get your caricature or you can get your face painted for kids like i want to be a lizard or whatever and i was walking by the caricature booth and there's this guy sitting there doing the caricature and there's a girl sitting there a young girl maybe like six to eight years old, very young and very fat. And I can see what he is drawing. And he drew a straight up pig snout and pig ears on this girl. I was halfway tempted to be like, babe, can we stick around

so that we can see the reaction here? Because there's this smiling little fat girl and he's got a big, big nose on her and big ears. Oh, that guy. I wish I could have stopped him and shook his hand. That is so fucking funny. A little dose of reality.

If she doesn't want to buy that. You know, if she doesn't want this, can you know if she doesn't want this can you hold it for me it's like that's just terrible it's my last day big ass pig nose have you ever had a caricature done of you yeah i did when i was little and i just remember thinking like this isn't good and i just wasted 10 minutes at a theme park and that was all i took from it i i was so excited i i don't know i was just like this is gonna be cool a picture of me in cartoon form like i can't wait and uh he gave me a giant nose now my nose is a little above average but it was not what he did in that goddamn caricature and also i had braces the braces were all the size of, I don't know, the size of a human ear.

They just stuck out. Sir, this caricature you've drawn of me is not accurate at all. I hear where you're coming from. But I'm 13. It could be a little more flattering. God, I wish I had taken a cell phone photo of that picture it was so over the top that if i were a caricature artist artist it was the kind of picture that i would want to do but not be comfortable giving a child it was that insulting and bad very funny

so that guy's the front runner so far this week good job st louis zoo caricature artist near the entrance near the entrance, near the north entrance of the zoo. If you're a St. Louis guy, stop by and get yourself a very insulting caricature. Did it hurt your feelings, Woody? Yes. Or were you more like, this is dumb? No, no.

I was like, this is how people see me? That was the kind of thought I had. That really is a bad age to be getting a caricature. Yes. Like early middle school where you're just gangly and your mind hasn't caught up with your body yet. Or in my case, late middle school. Late middle school. Fair enough.

Yeah, that guy. Sorry, I derailed us, but that made me laugh. So I was laughing all day. I was laughing all day at the zoo thinking about that. That's mean as fuck. I don't like the zoo. I don't like the zoo. I don't like the zoo. I feel sorry for the fucking animals,

man. I can't go. I have a mix of it though, because like if it's, well, it depends on the type of animal. First of all, if it's a mammal,

like a, uh, an ape or something, I'm like, ah, this thing's probably too smart to be in here. But I still have that enjoyment of like, I'm having fun reading the description and learning about where it's from and watching it, you traipse around the the ropes so i enjoy it if it's a reptile i don't

give a shit yeah that thing doesn't know where it is it doesn't care where it is it just knows that crickets are coming eventually like reptiles are so dumb there should be no guilt about keeping reptiles i feel bad for the birds though if i'm being honestiles in the aquarium. I feel bad for the birds, though, if I'm being honest. I even feel bad for the fish in the aquarium. Especially if they've got dolphins or whales. Yeah. Taylor says it's disgusting. Fish are retarded. Not all of them are.

They're in there like, fuck. Thunk. Wait, no. Thunk. Thunk. Yeah, you're not helping your they're not retarded stance. Yeah. This is fat face.

You kind of poked a hole in your own flan with that one. The fish are not as dumb as you think, Taylor. Sometimes they ram against the glass constantly. They've lived in there their whole life. They can't figure out the confines of their existence. He's probably trying to kill himself. That's probably all he can do. But, you know, they've got whales in Atlanta.

It is sad when like, oh, the biggest one is the killer whale when they're like dorsal. Is it their dorsal fin that curves over? Yeah, it's fucking, that's the is the killer whale. When they're like doors, is it their door? Yeah. That's the only time it happens is when they're kept in those fucking tanks. Well, whales is pretty fucked up. Cause they're very smart. This is a zoo.

It's not a, I mean like the biggest Marine animals they have at the zoo are like sea lions that they have in that giant thing. And they throw fish at them. And the sea lions seem stoked on it, but also it's like, that's their meal for the day. So in real life, I bet they're like talking shit about all the trainers and sea lion language

back in the cave later. I don't like it, man. I don't like those poor animals all locked up in there. They can't go anywhere or do anything. They want to go on vacation. Do you have fun, though, looking at the animals, like learning more and watching how they swim? I feel sad the whole time.

Really? I feel fucking sad. I've gone to the Atlanta Zoo. You've learned to compartmentalize that. Okay. I went to the Atlanta Zoo years ago and I was just like, I'm never coming back here. First of all, it smells like shit. Literally. And second of all,

I don't want to be there. Look at that fucking thing in there just looking at me like, let me out! North Carolina Zoos are weak sauce. I think Kyle may have been to it. It's like a county zoo kind of and there's some bears in rooms smaller than this one it's not cool but there are some bison and stuff who really have nice and habitats those are different i honestly like like like those animals like especially like when you go to tennessee

they have these big i wouldn't even call it it a zoo. It's more of a wildlife preserve. It's like a big, gigantic fenced-in area. The deer and shit out there, they're loving it. They don't want to be out where there's some fucking mountain liner. North Carolina has a better one, too, as I think about it. It's like a preserve, almost, with a giraffe.

I think you could buy a branch or something and feed it to the giraffe yourself. It's pretty cool. Yeah, I've fed giraffes before. That dude in Texas had a fucking pet giraffe named Sushi. I've never fed a giraffe. Oh, pussy. I figured most people have.

Don't they have those big dark tongues? Yeah, me too. I rode an elephant on an elementary school field trip. We went to the circus. I went to the circus. That was probably a very sad elephant. Thinking back, elementary school field trip we went to the circus i went to the circus yeah i rode an elephant at the circus that was probably a very sad elephant uh now thinking back he's he had a horrible life i'm sure uh just children climbing all over he probably yeah it's probably one of those that

went berserk and they had to gun down in the streets criminal elephant there's a place here called grant's farm which is like a big farm with orchards and stuff and they also have animal attractions and shit and they had elephants for the longest time and then like like three or four elephants and then out of nowhere like eight ten months ago they like they're like one of our elephants has tragically died and we're so sad about it and everything and then like four days later they're like another elephant has died and then another one died and like so they were just like dying of depression and so they take like the last one or two elephants

and are like get them the fuck out of here get them to Disney World or something cheer this guy up and so they like airlifted them out of there and got them somewhere I don't know how you would remove an elephant like put them on a semi that's probably too heavy for a semi. They use trains in the cartoons. In the cartoons, they do use trains.

Unless it's one of those elephants where they can fly with the ears. No, this was just a stock elephant. Just boilerplate. They exist, right? There used to be elephants that could fly. Yeah, Dumbo. I think that was like the 40s though so that uh pink elephants on parade uh song fantasia during fantasia scared the bejesus out of me scared me to death did that

spook you too it was so surrealist at the time well you're also you know four five years older than me so different different age so i mean i watched it in like second grade so like in music class for some reason you know there's a lot of me it's it's a musical so i was like this isn't funny at all hey teach this sucks that was that's how all of us felt none of us appreciated the orchestra you see children the penguins are the woodwinds nobody fucking cares can we just watch the lion king come on i remember in like i think it was like fourth grade where they were splitting our class up because they wanted us to do one of those like sing-along things that you put on for your parents where it's like they'll have to come to the auditorium and then the kids sing and do that kind of shit and they the teacher was like all right if you're a a tenor or a baritone whatever the name is musically for a lower voice

go to the right side of the class and if you're a soprano go to the left side of the class. And like 20 seconds into that, as I'm walking over to the boys' side, which was the deeper voice thing, I'm like, every single girl is staying on the soprano side. And so I was the only boy who was like, no, I just, I can sing real high, dude. And so for the next month, I got to practice with all the girls while they were doing it you know getting all that all that attention and they couldn't even tell that i wasn't singing i just pretending you saying soprano was actually a sign of puberty for taylor like it because like when there's when there's 30 of us singing you know 29 girls and me they can't tell

it i'm just going oh wow they don't know that i'm lying did you see this thing chiseling alpha move for me the woman locking her kid away no well you're close so what do you do when the police turn up your door and tries to gain entrance to your home without a warrant well if you're 90 year old Venus green, you lock the law breaking law man in your basement. She was 87 when the incident happened. And what happened was her grandson was shot. And she says it happened at a nearby convenience store, but the police insist it happened in her house. The police kept questioning him. They wouldn't let the ambulance attendant treat him. So I said, so I got up and said, sir, you've got to let the attendants treat

him. He's in pain. Oh, you did it. Come on, let's go inside. I'll prove where that blood is. You did it, is the officer. Police wanted to go to the basement where she lived, but, or where the grandson lived, but Green refused on the basis that the police didn't have a warrant. I said, no, you have to have a warrant if you want to go down to my house like that. He wasn't shot in here. The police officer replied, I'm going to find that gun. I'm going to prove that you did it. A struggle ensued between a male officer and Green. He dragged me.

He threw me in the chair. He put handcuffs on me and started calling me the B name. He ridiculed me. She's 87 at this point. The officer went into the basement and she locked him in the basement. She locked the door, the basement door, took matters into her own hands. This is a private home. And if I latched it, that was my prerogative because he had no search warrant to go in my basement.

So I had every right to latch it. She just won a $95,000 settlement. That bitch is cool. I like that. I don't know if she's cooler than the caricature artist, but pretty cool. Let's not put the caricature artist and this woman in the same conversation, first of all. Too late.

Welcome to the show. That's really cool. Locking a cop in your own basement. And winning. And winning. I would assume that a cop could come in here right now and kick me in the chest and be like, suck my dick or I'm going to kill you and give vacation for it.

And I'd be like, suck his dick because I'm a cop. You're going to fight the state. You need to learn the importance of compliance. That's what they tell everyone who gets manhandled by the police. Stop resisting. You're like,

not only did he give me a toothy blowjob, to swallow my broth. So he gets the settlement. Yeah. That's really cool though. I like that. I feel like if you're really old and you do something like cool like that that the state is going to award you or the city or municipality whatever

they should expedite it like they should make it faster because you're already so old like 95 000 to a 90 year old what's she gonna do use that money to live to 91 she's gonna spend 95 000 every month she has left. I'm really going to splurge on that new loan. That kind of shit. Really, they just awarded it to her next of kin, who's probably this grandson they don't like so much. I'm sure he'll do the responsible thing. Lock another cop in his basement yeah it becomes the family business yeah that's cool so a patreon question uh in your opinion who is the most

famous athlete to ever exist i have two in my head oh the most famous i mean i mean it's hard to get around jordan right no it's got to be a soccer, it's hard to get around Jordan, right? No, it's got to be a soccer player. It's got to be worldwide. It's got to be soccer. It's got to be like Ronaldo or Messi or one of those. Who's a Pele? Maybe Pele?

He's the good American one from like the 50s, right? He can't be more famous than the... Here's the one that was in my head. I had Jordan. It was like Brazilian or something. Oh, I think there's an old American Pele too. But Jordan was in my head, had jordan was like brazilian or something oh i think there's an old american pele too but jordan was in my head american centric i suppose the other one was muhammad ali i thought that was a good one he was world famous world was smaller though and media was wasn't as big like like i think jordan's era like like really pumps him up i mean if

you know like if you're talking about percentage of the civilized world that knows the guy there's probably some fucking roman um gladiatorial guy who was just yeah that charioteer the tits yeah that guy that got paid like the equivalent of millions and millions of dollars like highest paid athlete of all time um tiger woods is pretty big up there but i mean jordan the most desirable sneakers out there are still fucking jordans go to goat.com slash pka and it's he's you know he's still in the in pop culture in a way that like very few athletes can maintain that jordan hasn't shot a basketball in a decade yeah he's still huge i so to taylor's credit i'm looking at the most famous

athletes of 2019 which is not the question three out of four three out of the top four are soccer players and there's the other one lebron it is but you know who number five is conor mcgregor are you on the same website no i'm not i I'm not. I'm just guessing. Yeah, I would have guessed that too. He's fucking massive. I would have guessed that. I wouldn't have. I know that he's massive. I know that he transcends MMA to some extent, but I've still thought that it's something I care about.

You know who else is really famous? Theodore Blick, best paraglider pilot ever. Oh, God. Both of us know about it. Both of us. And now all three. I'm into acrobatic paragliding, right? It's been my passion.

It's what I'm up to lately. And they did a competition recently, and I saw the top three pilots on the planet. There they are standing on their pedestals, you know, first, second, and third, like the Olympics. There's nobody around. There's no crowd. There's like a guy sort of photobombing it.

Like it's the smallest sport ever. And I thought it was funny. It actually might be. Yeah. It may be because I saw a crowd. I was – a couple weeks ago i was at a bar with some friends and there's like no sports going on right now because you know baseball is not to the really interesting part and hockey and basketball are over and football's not going and so on the

they had espn2 or some shit on the tv and it was professional cornhole and for non-americans cornhole is the game where you have two kind of upward slanted boards with a hole in the middle that you put about 30 feet away from each other. And then you have two people standing near them and two people near the other. And you throw these beanbags and you try and land it on the platform or slide it on the platform into the hole. Obviously getting it in the hole. Hole's about the size of a golf course hole. Yeah, it's not a very big hole at all. It hard a little bigger than that because the the beanbags are a little bigger but it's relatively it's pretty a small hole to try and hit and these old ass guys

drinking one of them clearly drunk they were tossing these cornhole things and when i throw a cornhole like beanbag if I get it on the platform, I'm like, woo, warming up, getting hot, doing great. These guys, he made seven in a row. Just whoo, whoo, whoo. And there were at least a few dozen people in the crowd cheering him on. Some of them not even his friends and family. Dude, I saw a cornhole, and the guy had a beanbag halfway sitting in the hole.

The next guy threw it, whatever, 50 feet or something, knocked the first beanbag off the platform and sunk his own. Very impressive. And those guys are good enough at it that, you know, that was intentional.

Whereas like, when I do something like that, Oh really? He called his shot? He's like, should I knock that one off? The announcers went wild, said that a normal cornhole player wouldn't even think of that shot, let alone pull it off.

In the storied history of cornhole, we've never heard anything like this before. You gotta go back to the summer swing of 99. Of all eight competitors that have played this great sport, he's easily top five all time. So I play pool.

Oh, go ahead. No, go ahead. No, I was just going to say that that cornhole knocking the thing out. Like if I ever do that on accident and pool, I feel great,

but it's just because I took a bad shot that I didn't mean to do and that that happened well i was i was linked something from your twitter recently and it's taylor's twitter yes from taylor's twitter uh at murka durka and it seems that taylor has made the the claim that if you gave, and correct me if I'm wrong here about this quote, if you gave him a YouTube tutorial and half an hour, he could be top five in any women's sport in the world. Okay, well, my quote actually is, women suck ass at sports. Give me 45 minutes and a YouTube tutorial,

and I'm top five in any woman's sport instantly. LOL. Okay. Yeah. What I said, but much meaner. Okay, so on the surface, that's clearly bullshit, right? He's not going to be a top swimmer or a tennis player or whatever, but

which sports could Taylor just walk into the top five in? Oh, shit. We're going to have a hard time here. Genuinely, not many. Really? What about powerlifting?

There's at least five bad bitches out there in every sport. Not powerlifting? Bodybuilding. No, not powerlifting. Bodybuilding. They're a strong ass woman. No, not bodybuilding. No.

No, body. Like, I may be taller. And stronger and bigger. Give him a two- There's some really strong women. It's not about being strong and bigger. Look at the Olympics clips. It's about definition and stuff we cut and he just crushes those girls no i got you i got a lot of shit hanging out in the midsection

i gave you two weeks but if we're talking about power lifting it would take a long time to do that because these bitches have been doing nothing but dead lifting in the ukraine since they were two what's your dead max do you know i've stopped deadlifting a hundred percent ever since I watched that. Yeah. Because I watched a couple other YouTube videos that were like, you know, unless you're training for like a sport or something, it's not worth fucking your backup to get a marginally better at this lift.

And so I'm just sticking to like squat bench, overhead press, uh, and row. And then of course a bunch of accessory workouts like face pulls i think like to be a top five woman female power lifter it'd be a lot dude you gotta squat like 650 pounds or something there needs to be a sport hammer throw no way that that is so that's like soup yeah that's super technical you need to know exactly when to let go shot put same thing super technical yeah but that's you let go at the

end up all right i threw i did i've said before i did do shot put i did shot put and discus in uh my sophomore year of high school okay because i i've said before that they uh my dad and my mom were at the event they had me do the hundred meter hurdles because we didn't have enough people and I just humiliated myself and just laughed by so much. I sucked at it. And then the coach was like, alright Taylor, good effort, good effort, good effort.

How about you go over to just the throw heavy things as far as you can and I get over there and I realize I'm in the retard square where every other team has also been like, all right, fat kid, go throw the giant shot put. Shot put he can do. So I did that. Oh, maybe I could.

Yeah, I just watched an Olympic shot putter put a shot. And nah, I feel like I could compete in this sport. This is pretty. You think so? 17 feet. Wait a minute minute it's like a meter hockey why not oh shit oh but there's that'd be hard because there's no hitting in women's hockey that would be what gave me the edge they'd be doing circles around you right you could be goalie i i could be oh he's gonna fill that goal out quite nicely it's a smaller goal right no no same size goal well that's uh if i were like on point like when i was 18 i would have been the best female goalie on earth by an enormous magnitude i just can't

shoot the puck hard enough for it to make a difference like their hardest slap shot would be like something i get from practice from a decent place. I used to look at the Guinness Book of World Records in swimming and be like, I could be the fastest girl in the world right now or the fastest boy up to 1894. Also, I was reading something

about women's reaction times and how it's significantly slower, even among professional athletes i guess like we have faster reaction times than most female professional athletes it's like a quarter second or something like that that they're slower it's a big difference like that uh women are much better at perceiving shades of color than men and men are much better at tracking fast moving objects and they think evolutionarily that's like a hunter-gatherer

kind of thing where obviously you need to excel at one of those given things given your role. But as far as the... I'm trying to find the fucking power lifting records right now for what they do. I guarantee I couldn't do this. Are these pounds or are these... It's going to be in kilograms.

I would say... Lower body is going to be in kilograms. I would say, I wonder what the bench press is. I think that's, so lower body is going to be difficult because women have very strong lower bodies. Almost half as strong as men. I mean, I think it's more than that. Upper body difference is way bigger. The upper body difference is massive.

So like overhead press and bench press and stuff like that, you're definitely going to probably be a top five woman in the world uh it's something like that but like like 300 okay 312 pounds bench is the the biggest bench by the ipf uh international powerlifting federation i guess i don't know 300 is a lot though can you can you that is a lot no i can't bench press three i don't know you're really strong if you told me you could i'd have bought it if i if i really devoted myself for way longer than 45 minutes in a youtube tutorial then i might be able to but that you know credit or credits

oh that's the other thing he laid down that gauntlet of 45 minutes in a youtube tutorial we're not talking about max tay Taylor that he grows into at 30. What about a combat sport? The whole point of the tweet was to get people upset about it. And get people to be like, Serena Williams would beat your ass. And then I was hoping that people would say stuff like that so I could be like, nah, dude, I've watched her serves

online. I know exactly what to do. Oh, wow. But apparently enough people following are like, oh oh he's baiting that that they didn't engage what about a combat sport like like what about combat i wouldn't be able to do it because there are no women and like i'd have to cut so much weight i would be dead also i i think that i think some of these women would just flat out beat him the elite ones amanda nunez for sure yeah they know how to box and do special moves All I could hope for is that I could just brute strength

I need to see Amanda Nunez fight Taylor To know what's going to happen I need to see it She weighs 135 pounds I would pay $60 for that What if he grabs her I think that she's tricky Right she's a BJJ black belt

I think And it's just I don't know like a guy that knows how to grapple versus a guy that doesn't seize opportunities and i bet she would do that what if i played mind games like as she's doing stuff i'm like yeah just like that harder her english isn't so great you know what i would okay so no mind games russian phrases. Colin likes to wrestle all the time, and I tickle him, because he's not going to lay on subs and chokes and shit.

So I tickle him. But I've convinced him that adults aren't ticklish, that it's something that goes away. So all I have to do is hold out for a little bit, and he quits at it. That's a high IQ maneuver. Yeah, what does Amanda Nunez look like? I should know this.

She's kind of cute. She's not one of those really, really unattractive nor one of the really, really attractive ones. But she is the baddest woman in mixed martial arts right now. 18 and 4. She just beat Holly Holm. Perhaps ever.

Perhaps ever. She's probably the greatest female combat athlete of all time, at least certainly that we've ever seen. I don't see how you can make an argument that she's not. She's beaten everybody that they've put in front of her for a long time, a long time. Is there a sport that you two think, get rid of the joke tweet tweet i made like okay like give

it let's say six months you got six months to train and we'll even say you have like a pro trainer someone who's experienced with a given sport is there one you think you could break into the top oh me yeah because i was putting yeah either one of you i don't think if you put me in um i think shot put for sure because i just watched a woman throw a shot put and like i know i can throw it farther than that i think it was like 60 feet it was like 17 meters and she was pumped she was like yeah 17 meters and it was just like i can throw that bitch 20 i just i know i can i know i can you give me six months and a trainer to give me the form and like get stronger i'd throw that bitch 60 i just can i just can and she also did not look like a professional athlete. This Chinese bitch is enormous.

For peak Woody, obviously swimming. For current Woody, top five in the world at 46? Maybe just not. Swimming, you could. Now? No. That is a shot put record. You don't think if you really, really devoted to swimming...

They're really fast. I'm good. I've got you on this pedestal of swimming athleticism. When you're saying no, I refuse to believe it. There wasn't time. The world record is 73 feet. How heavy is it?

That's what I'm going for next. It was set by an East German athlete. Of course East German. Steroids. And the record for the men's event is... Okay, so it's going to matter how much they weigh because they're virtually identical throws. So let's see.

Women's shot put weight. 8.8 pounds. I cannot weigh much more than this big Chinese bitch. If more at all. So their shot put weighs 8.8 pounds. The men's shot put weighs 16 pounds. But the throw distance are virtually identical, like within a quarter of an inch or something like that

for the world records. Man. Oh, and this Chinese lady didn't even go very far new zealand eight pounds really heavy to throw something i wonder if i just tried to throw an eight pound object right now how far it would go i mean a bag of potatoes not so far but that little shot put look at it's it's it's gonna fit your hand well yeah it's an awkward movement though like it it's weird let me go to amazon and see if i can buy a woman's shot put please get some video that we can show what if you suck dick at it and you're

like no i got lost in the mail. Turns out the whole thing was bullshit. Yeah, there it is. I mean, Taylor's much stronger. He should order this thing and throw this bitch. I guarantee you can break the women's world record. Oh, dude, I could identify as a woman that afternoon? Get your girlfriend to hold the camera. Make a quick video of you being super pumped

to be the new women's world champion. And put it on Twitter. Like, get down in the form and do that under your neck thing and the spin. And when you throw it, like really grunt. You need to fake the measurement.

Fake the measurement. Just get like a, I don't know, a long flexible tape measure and don't show the fact that you like looped it over. Fake the measurement. Just get like a, I don't know, a long flexible tape measure and don't show the fact that you like looped it over itself in the middle. This tape measure starts at 10 feet.

Shut up. You can totally do it. I mean, it's... Who can't? These women are like, they devote their life to it. Doesn't matter. He's a boy.

I guarantee... Like, I know what 73 feet looks like and I can see that little metal ball and I know I can do that. What if it was really downhill? If I worked on the routine a little bit, we could all do that. I think we can, man. Alright, fine.

I think we drill down to the easiest sport to do. Even discus, that's a lot of technique. I just bought it. You just bought a woman's shot put.'s on the way how much is it twenty twenty three dollars for a woman's shot put but you got crown renowned in the shot put game as the tippity top of quality i don't know about that but i'm gonna break the woman's world record this way identify first it's important yes if wear a wig which one that would be the funniest thing you wear a wig and you don't even like shave your beard you just you grow it out even more that's great yeah i just think that's one that we can definitely do that that that has it's a low skill thing like i mean i mean i get there is some skill

but it's not as skillful as a lot of other things. As a team sport. It's not like learning to play fucking soccer or hockey or something, which I can't do. It's throwing a ball. I did that in elementary school or middle school or something. I thought we could do javelin, too. No, I think that's more skillful. Is javelin harder?

I have no idea. To me, look, I'm just going with what things look like to be fair and like the javelin throw looks more difficult past javelin expertise only runs so deep taylor yes they don't get a lot of hair time yeah mine's mostly based on revenge of the nerds that movie with lamar yeah i'd like to play mostly based on ace ventura pet detective when, that movie with Lamar. I'd like to play one with volleyball. Mine's mostly based on Ace Ventura, Pet Detective. When they throw those spears at him and they stick in both his thighs. That cracks eight-year-old people up. Do you know the Revenge of the Nerds thing I'm talking about? Yeah. The guy's gay.

We've specifically adopted this javelin for his limp-wristed throwing style. And he's bouncing. What'd you like here, Woody? Oh, this is the guy from, he's probably last week's cool guy of the week. And he's being interviewed and talking about, I guess,

the contribution to humanity he's looking to make. Can we watch it in sync? I'm ready. Let me pull it up. I was reading something. Oh, this guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's in the same shirt, isn't he? Is this his uniform? The more I see about this guy, the cooler he becomes.

Well, we might get him as a guest. Fingers crossed. That would be so sick. Are you guys ready? Ready, set, play. I guess the message I want to get across to this, along with 30 million other people that want me to interview with them, is addressing bullying.

It's going to end. I'm going to end it today. I'm the current prophet. I'm the current Martin Luther King. And if nobody likes it, too bad. That guy rules. That guy's awesome. I'm the current Martin Luther King. I'm ending bullying today.

Says the 4 foot 10 man the woman bending over to interview him that's great I'm glad he's parlayed his total inappropriate outburst into comedy interviews or unless he thinks this is like genuine which is a distinct possibility it's better if he really believes

what he said I believe he believes it Kyle you with me on this no I think he's a troll Kyle, you with me on this? No, I think he's a troll, but I really want to talk to him. You think he's a troll. I think he's delusional. I think that he thinks that everyone else is wrong. I think that he likes this attention a lot

and he knows how to get more of it. I'd love to have a conversation with him. Give him some attention not necessarily help in the strictest term i'm gonna be a little short with him yeah have a good time it'd be real fun that would be fun to uh to have an honest an honest discussion with this man definitely not make fun of him the whole time coming on i thought we're undercutting juice yes no no we would never do that we've been courteous to every single guest

we absolutely have yeah absolutely yeah i think i think so i said that off the cuff i wasn't thinking yeah i'm trying to think we've ever been rude to anyone. Oh. Oh, I got one. The guy who gave his phone number out. Well, that guy wasn't a guest. Not exactly. That was a commenter in the live chat. No, he was. I was talking about the guy.

He made YouTube videos and uploaded them and said, call me. He pretended that he was a millionaire, but he was homeless millionaire. He and his maybe cousin or something gave us dirty look videos that were hilarious. I never remember those guys. Something twin brother. I don't know. In 2020, I forget his name. Yeah.

I don't know. Yeah, we're usually pretty cool with them, like 99% of the time. I like most of our guests. There was somebody I didn't like a while back, and I was kind of shitty to them. I can't remember who it was. It's been like a year now. Yeah. Yeah.

Probably that damn Jericho. Everybody likes Tucker. He's impossible not to like. But yeah, I hope we can get this guy on the show. That would be fucking hilarious. I would we can get this guy on the show. That would be fucking hilarious. I would love that. Speaking of fucking hilarious.

Actually, that's not an appropriate response to this. Speaking of hilarious. The leukemia child just got burned. Look at this dumb woman who got hit by a car. This old Wayne bitch. This pastor got caught sucking on his constituencies or his congregation's

dicks, his parishioners. His flock. And he said that it was to get demons out of them. Does it work? And so he was sucking cock to get demons out of his parishioners and he used that as an excuse when he was called out legally on it and i think that takes a lot of balls not just the balls that were in his face apparently like i would love him to suck

my cock until the demon came out so to speak really i mean look at him oh jesus christ i command you get out of this man it's not gay if you're the pitcher it's it's fine i always spit because i don't swallow he doesn't look like the kind of person i would want sucking my dick no he i'd be that's a toothy blowjob right there i don't want any part of that. Really? He's also fat. I mean, if there's anyone who has blowjobs down pat, it's this guy wearing a cross and a priest's collar. That's like the international symbol of I'm good at sucking dick, I think. Well, let's get through the description of what happened,

and then it'll make a little more sense from his perspective. Okay. In the spring of 2000, Weaver told Weist that in order for the ritual to be more effective, they had to go upstairs where he could lay down with more stones and candles. Over the next few visits, Weaver informed Weist that he had suffered hits from the spirit world and they needed to be brought out through his semen by oral sex. Weaver told Staunton he had to lay still with the stones on and around him and let the Reverend get it out.

Feeling mortified was an understatement, but I didn't want to say he was wrong after he helped me to this point, Weiss said in his statement. I was so confused and upset, I remember praying to God, please let me get this over with. You got molested. Wait, how old was this boy?

Yeah, that's what I need to know, because he was a priest. No, not the priest! The boy getting his dick forcibly blown. Oh, uh, 38. And that's a rough 41. Oh my god! He's 38. I'm making all these ages up.

Dude is 38 and got talked into this. No, we're gonna run with it. I think... Oh, no, no, no. The victims were 3 and 8. No, that's not true either. oh no it's not true either it's not true either no I need to know how how old was the man who got bamboozled into oral sex with his pastor see on one hand everything about this story to me implies that they're consenting

adults on the other he belongs to the largest pedophilia organization in the world the church so one might guess it was a kid no this isn't a catholic this isn't a catholic guy this is a presbyterian minister yeah i lump them so that's a rarer pokemon card than the catholic kind yeah this guy's a protestant um it says that he was the pastor there for 40 years think of how many guys got their dick sucked by him and like a year later we're like that wasn't about demons at all that was about semen this whole time it must be the same way that like you know how people who get hoodwinked and scammed are often less likely to come forward about it because divulging that information makes them feel foolish and look foolish to some people

that's probably what happened to a lot of these guys who got their dick sucked by this guy is they're like shit i came out of my depression finally it had nothing to do with that fucking maniac sucking my cock but i'm not telling anybody about this ever what if it works well then we are pillorying a good man i think that's the case here because he looks very upstanding to me you know that is a satan move that he would make it so that the only way to get rid of demons that was that you had to suck him out of a cock another man had to do it so he's like losing the possessed guy but he still gets you on the sodomy yeah oh satan's very smart that way yeah it's like hedging his bet.

Yeah, I don't know, man. I really need to know how old his quote-unquote victim is. It doesn't say. I imagine he was a full-grown adult because he was able to come. Well, I mean... For you, that was like 10. Yeah, I mean, you know... I think that the guy who got bamboozled, you couldn't trick me into this. You can't trick me into this.

Okay, like you couldn't trick me into this 20 years ago. No, you couldn't. If that Elmer Fudd looking motherfucker was like, hey, Kyle, 13 year old Kyle from 20 years ago ago you got demons in you he's like no i don't think so pretty sure those don't exist but uh i mean 50 50 well they're in you really nah you got you got ghosts in your balls you gotta get rid of them and you're going to suck him out. I mean, I think you just want to suck my dick. This is a situation. WWMD, right? What would Milo do?

He'd get rid of the demons. And with a smile on his face, he'd get rid of those demons. That's the direction I think you want to go. I'm not buying him. I would buy it if I were a 13-year-old who was being requisitioned to have my penis sucked by an older man to get rid of my demons if it was something like getting my dick sucked i'd be like nah like day one of church i learned this homosexual stuff does not fly so you're yeah you're fooling me but if it was something like now thou must take your penis out that the leeches may be placed like something like that

it'd be more like oh this seems kind of biblical it's creepy and i don't know enough cocksuckers before leeches yeah i i wouldn't want any that would that was i mean i still wouldn't do it i mean like would you rather have a leech on your dick or that old man's mouth on your dick and that old man's mouth of course i mean i don't want to leech on your dick or that old man's mouth on your dick? That old man's mouth, of course. I mean, I don't want a leech on my dick. Well, it doesn't have to live there. Neither does the old man. Neither does the old man. That's not a counter.

Yeah. Yeah, well, yeah. At least I don't have to burn the old man off with a cigar later tonight. Can't you just pull leeches off? No. You can in the movie I saw. If you want it to hurt real bad, you gotta burn them. In every single movie I've ever seen.

Are you mixing up leeches and ticks? I don't think you've seen Congo. And you also don't want to burn ticks off. All you have to do is take tweezers and get them, but make sure that you get the head. That's the only trick with the ticks. I don't want to give medical advice to anybody when I don't know what i'm talking about my experience with with no i i try to be accurate

with most of the things i say as far as these tick things go you don't try to be accurate already we're off the rails with that untrue accurate 95 of the time i've pulled a lot of ticks off of myself my a lot i mean maybe 10 in my lifetime you know go hunting or whatever play paintball in the woods get ticks in my in my hair i just pull them the fuck out never once have i had like a chunk of the tick left inside of me like i guess it could happen but it never did yeah i've had way more than 10 ticks and maybe two heads in there yeah lyme disease is the real concern lyme disease fucks you up in so many weird ways they can cure it now but i i don't

it takes years though and it can still make you like allergic to meat and stuff or something weird things like that yeah exactly like the like like you'll just be like weak and not be able to like uh but like have any energy for like five years or you'll be like like taylor's allergic to red meat now it's like what the fuck i had a tick this year and um the tick bite location got kind of red so i just happened to go to a doctor for an annual physical and i was like hey while i'm here what do you think of this you know location i got there was a tick right there and now it's got this red thing. And he said, watch for a fever, which didn't happen, and watch for a bullseye-style redness.

And so I didn't get Lyme disease from it. Neither of those things were a thing. But there's your 95% accuracy. If you get bit by a tick followed with a bullseye, whatever that looks like. Does it literally have rings of red? I don't know. But the fever.

And then the numbers. Yeah your head's 17 and 15 i've seen a couple ticks just like two weeks ago i was fishing in some tall grass and i noticed them like hours and hours later they're both both on the back side one on the back of my calf like near that knee crux and the other one on the side of my knee on the same one and uh oh but even worse than those i got a bunch of chiggers chiggers and chiggers are the worst so much worse than always playing loud music oh chiggers yeah those are i'm talking about the bug that bites you while you're while you're fishing, Kyle. Gotcha. You goose. But a way to get rid of those is you take, like, a clear nail polish,

and you paint it over the site where it's, like, buried in, and then it suffocates, apparently. And it's not that clear nail polish has, like, something special in it. It's just that you look silly when you have to use purple. Trust me. Have you done that before? Yes, I have. i was like like kitty doesn't paint her nails and i was like i had sugars all over my like ankle area from like wearing like like like right above my sock and like they had just gotten me good in this field in tennessee and they itch like a motherfucker and

i was like i need nail polish she's like this is all i've got and it's fucking purple i'm like well fuck it if it's gonna make this itching go away you know just and i and you can't like i couldn't tell like exactly where they were like it wasn't like oh yeah like it's not like a bee sting it's just like everything itches in this area so i just painted my whole upper ankle area purple with nail polish and i fixed it in like a day what happens to them when they die under there do they just like get into your just recycled through your bloodstream or something somehow those are quite those are questions i don't ask uh i think the way they work is they like burrow in and they're like lack they're inside of your skin and then they've got like

their asshole like hanging out in the world or something breathing and shitting simultaneously and you just block that up and they suffocate that's oh that's so chiggers are disgusting burying into your skin with their ass in the air yeah i'm not a fan of that what are those are they like a kind of tick what the fuck are they there's some sort of weird parasite i think i saw like a microscopic photo of one one time because they're tiny as fuck like you can't see them or i can't i couldn't but yeah you're right they're like a little wormy thing teeny tiny they're called berry bugs i guess berry bugs but that's too nice of a name but chiggers might be too harsh yeah yeah i don't know why they went with chigger. Oh, in this article, this guy's got like a thousand chiggers. I need the entomology of that word.

The entomology, where'd it come from? Man, these things are annoying. It's just some horrible Southern guy. Everybody's like, well, you know, Edwin came up with a real interesting word to describe these folks. I think this is gonna catch on. I feel like I'm gonna take

all the heat for this. You know, Woody says chigger with an aggressive R. It's the hardest R out of the whole group. Woody and chigger i don't i don't think people i don't think chiggers like are a northeast or like a northwest or like how funny is that if there's people who don't think we're just making a thing up that's what i'm saying like i don't think a lot of people out of the country know what a chigger is like where it they'll know in jersey it's the larva of something right like it's not the actual

like thing i think you're right i i think it's like the lar it's that to me makes it even more disgusting that it's they're like the fucking xenomorphs from the alien movie like part of their like life cycle is burrowing into something until they turn into another thing fucking gross nature's nature's disgusting most of the time fortunately oh no i guess they live everywhere if you're in a moist grassy area like a field these things can get you chigger came from the word chigo and not anything else chiga as they prefer to be called k Kyle, don't say chiga. You might think it's okay, but it's not.

No, you can't say chiga. People will still hold it against you. Yeah. I think I'd rather get mosquito bites than have these things. Of course. Mosquito bite goes right away. You rub a little alcohol on that bitch and it's no more.

Do you know anybody who's allergic to mosquitoes? i didn't know that was a thing is it it is i i know someone who is it's not like they get sick but like you know how you'll get a mosquito bite and it's just a little kind of tiny little red bump yeah they would get that same bite and it would be like half dollar sized and like infinitely more itchy they inject something into you. That's probably what they're allergic to. Their saliva. Yeah, it's anticoagulant or something like that. It's anticoagulant and what's the thing that stops pain? Yeah, I've got no idea.

An anesthetic? Anesthetic, yeah. You guys want to hear this bisexual chat thing? Sure, what is it? All right, I'm giving you a link. So it's a straight couple. They message someone. Are you bisexual?

Cool. Would you be interested in having a naughty chat with us? And then she writes back. Listen, just because I'm bisexual doesn't mean I'm interested. Well, let me start over. Listen, just because I'm bisexual doesn't mean, doesn't fucking mean I'm interested. Well, let me start over. Listen, just because I'm bisexual, it doesn't fucking mean I will instantly be attracted to every straight couple ever just because you're a guy and a girl and I'm attracted to both genders. In fact, neither of you are my effing type. I'm in a happy, loving relationship with a kind-hearted man.

Straight couples like you should stop treating bi's like we're a fucking sex toy to just be, it's a sex toy to you just because of your sexuality. It's really biphobic. And 99% of bi women especially are suck of bigoted prejudiced couples like you. Just stop. We're not interested in you nor are we slutty. So the next time you talk to a bi girl or guy, consider how incredibly shitty you're treating us by reducing us to a tool to be used by straight couples. We're too we love mostly one human at a time we're not sex objects yeah say this dude over the top right you know i just one thing you should take note of interested in having a naughty

chat with us just say no so the the so the bisexual person's point of view, and a lot of people who are in an other group, whatever, some sort of minority, whether it's trans people or whatever. And they're a bit straight. They don't like being fetishized for that thing. Even racially, they don't like being fetishized for that. Like, oh, I'm the i'm i'm the black girl that you want to fuck because i'm a black girl or or whatever the case may be black

men don't seem to mind they but but most people do not like being fetishized of every race do not oh you like bulls i am a bull yeah we don't care but um but but if you look at where this was posted it's posted in our bisexual and if you start scanning through those comments it's a fucking dumpster fire as the mod himself admits because all of them are on the bisexual woman's side like yeah that's how people always are they think that just because i like having sex with men and women that i'll have sex with a man and a woman and it's like well yeah we we did we did think that um i guess we're wrong though sorry why are you so angry what was the context of this post or like what is the context of this whole texting relationship right probably a dating site

it opened with oh that's a good guess it looks like whatsapp to me that's that's an app let me take another look um but uh i can't tell i use whatsapp every day yeah it has that color um so they must not have known this person well because they asked are you bisexual so it's not like they had a big relationship but they were just hitting on her i i know what worked, I thought. I didn't know that they had to dress him down and get so angry. I don't know. I've been hit on by a gay guy. And I thought, well, he might be gay, but his vision's fine. It's flattering. A simple no

will do. Maybe what I would do, I might even lead him on a little bit. It'll do wonders for my self-esteem, my confidence. And then like, you know, just like, you know,

when you're out and about flirting with a girl and everything's going well, and then she drops like 20 minutes in like, Oh, my boyfriend would do. And it's just like, you, you can't. Boyfriend. You knew what I was trying to do here.

You girls have boyfriends? Yeah. How did you not realize that i was wanting to have sex with you where's this from it's always sunny but yeah it seems like and you know i'm not a i'm not a card carrying member of the bi community but it does seem like this was either a sex or a dating or a hookup site and they're like, hey, wanting to fool around? They got read the riot act.

I think it's fake. That is definitely WhatsApp. People don't lie on Reddit. That's not a thing. That's definitely WhatsApp. I think Woody said he does too. I use WhatsApp every single day. It's pretty... They've got their own look.

The text bubbles, the color format, the background, everything that's, that's WhatsApp. Um, now it is possible that they like met up on some other site and then like send each other their WhatsApp and then go there.

Cause that, that's pretty common thing that people do. Um, but yeah, they don't think they deserve to get their head bitten off. That's where I was. Yeah. I, I, I guess I just never thought someone hitting on you was such an insult yeah i i i don't know what it's like to be fetishized um i guess i do to some extent i

don't know for for various things but but but like i think as dudes like like we just don't care you know we're like yeah cool oh oh you only want to have sex with me because i'm an american and that offends your that would offend your family great i don't there's an episode of um curb your enthusiasm where there's like a palestinian woman who fucks larry because he's a jew and she's like fuck me you jew bastard give me that zion cock resettle in my pussy something like that like like just really and like i want to i can't remember exactly who it was it's like but larry's jewish friend is downstairs and he happens to overhear this and when the palestinian woman leaves he's very offended by like the dirty talk because the dirty talk was all of this like jewish palestinian stuff

and he was like i can't believe what i overheard that was that was horrific i'm offended it's like no but i just think it like as dudes like we just don't get offended like sex we're happy to be getting laid like for whatever reason the other individual is into us or what they're about like you know we're just down yeah i mean i don't know the context of this whole message what would the fetish have to be that you were turned off like the sex is still going to be just sex but what if the girl said to you taylor you look just like my brother what's your brother's name taylor taylor no well my name's kaylor now what What is your brother? Let's see. I would do it.

I've got a really big Nazi fetish and I've brought the Hitler get up with me. Like, I hope this isn't too foreign. I'd grab the little mustache, slap it on, put the hat on. What do you want me to do? I don't know any of his speeches, but I can yell in grunting words if you want. I so say you say that! Close enough. Yeah, that's close enough, right?

Oh, you're already dripping on the floor. You're liking the stuff so much. Oh yeah, if she was dressed up like Stalin or Chairman Mao, or if she's like, hey, I want you to take this marker and put that swastika on your forehead because I have a Charles Manson fetish. I'd be in the mirror like, which way did the things go again?

Do they go to the right or the left? Yeah, that would be fucking... Yeah, I don't think there's any things that... I would be down for whatever fetish that I appeal to her for. Even furry stuff. See, furry might be different though because I feel like sex in a furry costume is not good.

And hot and sweaty, right? You gotta be burning up and feeling like almost you can't get any air because you're wearing a mascot hat. You're like re-breathing air in there. I'm trying to think like You need a positively ventilated furry costume right you know

like a fan like like like my pc like where i've got like a fan sucking on one side a fan blowing on the other oh now you're changing that air circulation i need that anyway because mine's inflatable right so it just oh yeah goes in there and comes out the face can you imagine eating a pussy that's been in a mascot costume all day? Imagine. Oh. No, definitely not. No, definitely not. I don't know. As long as it was a normal. You keep moving.

Is there any costume that a woman could ask you to wear, no matter how offensive, as long as it's like a normal costume, like clothes, not like a mascot suit? There's absolutely nothing that I would not put on. Yeah yeah i'm not really feeling that giant plant from the horror movie but oh yeah i don't know what we're talking about you don't know little shop of horror that's the one yeah i don't know if i've seen that well it's probably a lot of people haven't it's old well they should see it it's a great fucking movie it's a musical it's fun it's got uh that little guy from honey i shrunk the kids who uh retired oh rick moranis rick moranis he retired from uh acting take care of his dead brother's kids or something like that real cool guy yeah this might be the one that ruins sex for me here i'll give you a link taylor

means no worries for the rest of your day wait did you just hakuna matata little shop of horrors um i was just i was still going back to like some sort of scenario where we were dressing up like lion king okay and and fucking but um dude that little shop of horrors plant has got some dsls oh look at those teeth though dick sucking lips for anyone who didn't get it yeah dsls on that plant yeah i dress up as anything i don't give a fuck um you know i do like blackface or or like um also anything blackface shouldn't be offensive i know you feel that way yeah because whiteface doesn't offend me so clearly we've been down this road until our feet are bloody.

I like that expression. But I can only get off with blackfaces on. Don't kink-shame me. Now, where do you go from there? Well, you would clearly go... Oh, yeah. That would be a conflicting viewpoint, right? Someone would have a real

self-hate developing. No one would take the side of the guy who has a black face fetish no one no no no the sex positive movement is coming out for that guy what if it's a girl that has that fetish right then nobody's your anti-woman and king shaming you can do whatever you want in the privacy of your own home. It's about what you do in public. It's about, I can't have blackface here, even though it would be hilarious.

Imagine if I just showed up with blackface, and I did the hair too. All right? Like, we're going full bore. We're loaded for bear, goddammit. Like, we're, I'm doing a voice. I'm wearing a LeBron jersey. Like, I've got chains.

We've got our Halloween lineup a third of the way chosen now. That's so fucking funny. What if we all came? Two funny thoughts. If we all came with a black face

or if we said we were all going to come, but Taylor and I didn't. Right. I'm already on to this one. Yeah, Woody, we're all doing it. Yeah, no, that's not happening. Woody shows up with a half-empty container of shoe polish. I saw that coming before it came.

Yeah, nobody would take the side of the blackface fetish person now don't say nobody very few that would oh never mind i won't say that oh wow like what did taylor just think that can't be said on painkiller already like what i can't imagine things all the time there's not a lot of censorship in this show taylor did you see the democratic debate lineup i don't know if i can share it very well i did not um i have not followed much politics recently so first night you got williamson oh i remember seeing funny clips from her she seems fun ryan i don't know who the fuck that is. Khloe Bouchard. Barely know who that is.

Buttigieg. I know who he is. Sanders, Warren, O'Rourke. That guy apparently is struggling. Hickenlooper. Don't know who that is.

Delaney. Don't know who that is. Bullock. Never seen him before. I'm disappointed. There's still this many people left. I am. Oh,

there's so long to go though. It's like over a year. I thought that you were going to need 2% this time which cuts it down to eight i think and there's i think it's 20 if i'm counting this right yeah 20 of them okay come 20 also yeah so and then for people who're not looking at the screen there's two different nights 10 on a stage at a time a sanders and warren are on the first night and buddha judge actually so there's like kind of three of the five heavy hitters and then kamala harris and biden will be right next to each other for the second night which is fun because she sort of sucker punched him in the last debate and now they'll get a chance to go back at each other again so that's cool

but that's good yeah you see you could tell me like if someone was like all right looking at this picture which four people are totally made up i would sit there and look at it like i don't know man oh this is tough uh hickenlooper is definitely fake. Hickenlooper made up. Delaney Bennett. You're not real. Ryan over there. You look like... His face looks like a me. Like something you would make on your Nintendo Wii or your Switch.

There's a Cuban guy named Castro? That's a joke. That's not real either. They're trying to fool us. Inslee? I bet. I bet there's someone named Inslee. De Blasio blasio i know you're real but you're way off to the side so people must not be liking what you're serving up that's how they do it right the most popular people are in the middle i think it would be i think it is to my eye it looks like you got sanders and warren up there it'd be fun if

de blasio came and then just made fun of Trump's lack of business success the whole time. Anything to make these things more entertaining. I don't watch them. I think he's worth about $30 billion compared to one-ish. I don't know, ten-ish. Whatever. In any case, even Trump's inflated numbers are not one-third of de Blasio's true numbers. So that would be funny.

That would be good. Who else is a billionaire on here? He's the only one, I think. Some of these side guys might be. I have no fucking clue who they are. Yang is rich. He was a successful entrepreneur, but I don't think he's a billionaire.

Andrew Yang. Do you know what he did? Something to do with software, I think. I could look it up real quick. Something to do with software, I think. I could look it up real quick. Here's what he made in 2018. That's not what I want.

I want how much. Where's his Wikipedia page? Here we are. Yeah, I'm surprised he's so far in the middle. I didn't think he was popular. None of these people matter other than like those middle four right sanders warren biden harris like it seems like it's kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy at this point like they're gonna be the four heavy hitters i would imagine i hear it i think between sanders and warren people are gonna lean more sanders if they're on for that shit because they're gonna

be like oh well sanders has had a pretty consistent message for the last 40 years like you know he's not pandering like like him or not he's being honest with what he believes whereas like biden i don't he seems like the safe pick but doesn't seem like anybody really likes him that much it's a five-man race this is everything i hear buddha judge sanders warren biden harris not Harris. Not in that order. They won't run Buttigieg. He's polling fifth. And then after that it kind of drops off. It'll end up being Harris. Take that to the bank, just like

my Stanley Cup final predictions, which are always super good. I would win $100 if it was Harris. I think that a large part of the Democratic voting bloc are not liberal enough or whatever to vote for homosexual. I mean, I would, but I don't think that a lot of Democratic voters are. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, Taylor said it and it opened my eyes to my agreement in that a lot of democrats are black and the black community in general is not as pro-gay as yeah

a lot of them are hispanic the black and hispanic community are like religious yeah exactly really religious and so like gay to them is still like It's interesting that the right Lost those people somehow along the way I don't know The Republicans are so fucking incompetent They're just not single issue voters That's how I feel about the Democrats They're all the worst

Taylor did you watch the trailer for Top Gun I did I'm so pumped I was anti-pumped What got you excited taylor did you watch the trailer for top gun i did no i mean i've never i've never seen the original i was anti-pumped what got you excited um first of all visually it looks fucking incredible it looks great there hasn't been a a movie like that about um fighter pilots fighter jets since top gun maybe and it the visuals looked incredible okay tom cruise is great in everything he does these days especially he's he's he's like wine he's gotten so much better with age i think um all of his action stuff he's good at being choosy too right like he doesn't

pick a lot of shitty movies he made that mommy movie uh about two years ago and it single-handedly crippled the warner brothers touche yeah but in general if you throw a dart at a Tom Cruise movie, it's probably above average. But it looks really good to me. I'm definitely down. I like the original. I'm going to enjoy it a lot. It looks really fucking good to me. I hope, you know, when they're like

I like, and the trailer was really good he's like you've been in the Air Force for like 30 years now you should be a two-star admiral right now and and instead you're you're a captain and like you turn around you're looking at like yeah tom cruise is like 53 or something like that he should not be flying still he's a good looking 53 i yeah he's a great-looking 53. Dude, I saw it, and I was like, this is just nostalgia bullshit. I wish I could show you guys the trailer, but it's all music.

There's the shot of him riding what seems to be the same flippin' motorcycle down the runway. There's the jets opening the afterburners on the ground. There's some fighter jets flying. I'm like, if you just reused shots, you could have made this trailer. No way. It looks great. There's barely a new plot in my head. I think the movie is going to be below average.

Oh, we don't know what the plot is. We don't know what the plot is at all. All they leaked is that his career has been running behind schedule, which I have to assume means he likes flying planes and chooses that. There you go. He's the William Riker. Interesting. You said Riker. But yeah, no. Kirk went to Admiral, then went back down to Captain.

Seemed to just like running the Enterprise. Well, they were always offering Commander Riker his own ship. It was the subject of the whole episode. They're always, you know, you should be a captain by now. You're holding the people below you down. They can't rise up. And it's like, yeah, but the way he sits

in that chair is cool. The way he steps over it. You're not going to get that reference. He steps in the chair is funny. He mounts the chair and swings his leg over it when he sits down. He has this back problem where he can't just take a seat. The actor does? Yeah. So when he sits, they call it the reicher maneuver i just like the way

but yeah i'm pumped for that i want to see that a lot and there was another movie trailer i can't think of that i saw today oh it was the it trailer but i didn't watch it because i don't want any more spoilers i saw the first it trailer for the second movie but the first trailer for the second movie that came out a while back and that creeped me the fuck out with that old lady running oh we watched that on pkn i think yeah that was very did you guys watch the first movie right i did i think i was the last or no what do you still haven't right did we speak about that already or no yeah we talked about it on maybe even pkn but but i liked them for a month i hated the first movie but um i think the second will be better because there aren't child actors this time Yeah, we talked about it on maybe even PKN, but I liked them for a month or so. I hated the first movie,

but I think the second will be better because there aren't child actors this time. I didn't think that it was bad. It just wasn't that good. What's the last horror movie you saw that spooked the shit out of you? Where you were laying in bed that night like, fuck, that kind of went, the tendrils of that movie are sneaking into my ear.

I wrote down kyle's movie apostle um what was the other movie that he suggested was good he's like looking for a partner to watch it with oh shit i don't know we'll have to ask him again but that apostle one sounds good the more he was describing it the more i feel like i've started that movie before and then wandered off and been busy doing something i didn't come back to it so i'll need to check it out again i think in general kyle's more impacted by horror movies than i am like he's there's many movies where he said that he had to stop because he couldn't like continue watching it uh yeah i think that's part of the reason that kyle remembers things so photographically when it comes to movies is that

well not even just the scared thing which he clearly gets more spooked by these movies than you and i do uh but also like sadness and emotion and stuff he'll be like i was watching this and i was bursting out crying it's like you know having an emotional reaction to something like that is going to make it ingrain in you a little more and so i think kyle's naturally more receptive to those things and kind of has them imprinted on his mind. That's just a pop armchair retard analysis. It's working for me. No, it's genius. It's 2000 IQ pop retard.

Hell yeah. Yeah, I want to find a real spooky movie. I love scary movies. My girlfriend watches them with me, but she gets so many nightmares about them that you know a lot of nights i'll be like oh let's go watch a spooky movie and she just shuts it down like nah nah we gotta watch it's always sunny or something funny or play uh super smash brothers super smash brothers by the way i'm getting better at it more quickly now i can beat level nine computers how many levels are there nine uh it's one to. And so I can beat level nine computers pretty consistently.

Last time I spoke, I think I said, only saying it because I had people on Twitter being like, hey, talk more about Smash. Talk more about Smash because I'm having fun. So the characters I like now the most, I think I'm best with Bowser or Wolf. And then I'm trying to figure out Pac-Man because he's neat and fun.

And I never played the Mega Man games, but I like Mega Man too. Pac-Man is complicated. And Sonic. I can see why it would take a while. Yeah, playing all those different ones. But it's such a fun game. I'm having a lot of fun with it. I haven't played online yet because I'm enjoying this false high of like,

ha-ha, I'm real good at this game. Because the second I hop online, I'm just going to get ass-rammed by some 13-year-old. I did that in COD 4. I beat the game on Veteran, so I figured I'd walk into multiplayer. Probably one of the best. These guys see you immediately and they start shooting. They don't even look at you and then say something in Arabic to give you five seconds to kill them. Yeah, Mortal Kombat is the best example of that I can think of. There's only two ways to play Mortal Kombat,

single player and with a friend sitting next to you. When you go online, you're playing with a whole different breed of person. These are some... I don't know what to think about fighting game gamers. They're a different breed than shooter gamers. We're totally different kinds of people, I think i i don't get it that's true i i enjoy fighting games i like it a lot they're making a new mortal kombat movie it's rated r it's gonna be the first time they've

ever had one rated r they're gonna have the fatalities and everything and i'm excited about that nice i like mortal kombat i used to i remember going to the pizza hut and uh and making sure i brought my quarters with me so i could play mortal kombat i was like this kind of this dirty thing i had to like yeah i'm gonna go play uh the rambo game and really i'm playing mortal kombat i want to rip some heads off i want to fucking pull a heart out of somebody you know and uh who was your character i like sub-zero a lot i like the idea of phrasing somebody and then scorpion's really cool too because you get over here you know he's got his own fucking catchphrase and shit uh so those are two problem you know i think those are are two mainstays that are in like every single game you would have fun with smash i know you

think it's dumb and shit but i think that little concept is dumb yeah i think the you know i'm not into that that that what's it even called a ds no a switch wait wait you mean those little tiny controllers you don't use those i don't're playing on a little handheld thing, right? No, it's just like the same size as an Xbox controller. Okay. So like... You've got your own little screen there, right? No, I just plug it up to my TV.

Okay. So like I have it going to my TV. And like the way it works is there's like a five-inch screen that you can have these side controllers, like two sides of a controller on there and take it and take it handheld. Or you can plug it in to stand attached to your TV, their HDMI, then take those side things out and attach into like an Xbox style thing.

And so then you just have an Xbox controller effectively, or like, it's more similar to a GameCube controller, which GameCube had great controllers. So no complaints there, but it, yeah, it's,

it's a ton of fun. Like it, I can, it's one of those games where like i can tell like you know when you watch in like 2009 you'd watch grizz just merc some people with no scopes and quick scoping and just like like 10 kill streak and then you'd be like oh i'm amped up i'm revved to go i'm ready i'm ready and you hop on cod 4 and you just get butt fucked and like you go on like a two kill quick scope streak and be like god damn it this sucks same thing with this where i'll feel like i'm the cat's pajamas as i'm beating these level 9 computers and then i'll watch zero that guy on youtube and like the way he's like measurement, like watching by frame when he's like,

Oh, so when Mario does that throw of his fireball, the second the smoke is gone, that's when you want to hit, you know, if you do it too early, it's going to accidentally counter it. And then he's got to jump to punish your,

your bad timing. Do you ever watch any speed run videos of people like going for world record speed runs and various games? Uh, no, I've never really watched those. There's a rabbit runs and various games? Uh, no, I've never really watched those. There's a rabbit hole. You can go down,

uh, watching those like platformer, super Mario kind of stuff. Everything, everything. Um, doom was a big one for a long time. I watched this like 40 minute video telling the story of these group of

gamers, like worldwide who were trying to break the speed run for one level of Doom, just one level. And it's like they keep learning new techniques and they learn that if you hit the wall at this angle, it would give you a little more inertia. So then you could jump over this gap rather than navigating it.

And the record started at 40 seconds and it ended up at like 11 seconds or something like that after years and years like they they cut it down by 29 seconds or whatever but they have those speed records for all sorts of different games and they have this thing where you can do these custom-made mario levels that are just retarded those yeah mario. I saw the one that was getting sent around Twitter where it's just all fire sticks spinning and somehow this guy is masterfully

dipping and dodging and diving. The other was Dark Souls. Dark Souls is a game that Wings plays occasionally and the reputation of Dark Souls is that it's impossible if you play high difficulty, right? game that wings plays occasionally and um very hard the reputation yeah the reputation of dark souls is that it's like impossible if you play high difficulty right um i think that's the reputation um it's one of those games where like wings talked a ton of shit about how good he was

and then like rage quit rage quit rage quit like people would join it has this mechanic where you can like join and battle him and he's just like if you're gonna come and battle me you better bring your blah blah blue with the with the soul gems or whatever and somebody just joins in there and just whips his ass or whatever your rage quit but this guy's going for like the world record speed run on this game and i don't remember who was watching him do it but they themselves were like a world-class dark souls player and they're watching this guy set a new record and he's like the fuck what the fuck and it's not it's not one of these 40 second videos or five minute videos it takes like an like 40 minutes or something to be to speed run it yes wow and it's this complex he has he must have done it he must have devoted hundreds and hundreds of hours

to this shit because of all the stuff he has to memorize there's parts where you're like running on a catwalk where you you don't have any like lateral movement to like dodge you've got like two squares left and right and a long catwalk to run down and there's like fireballs and arrows coming at you and he's just like duck dodge dip run run run sw swank, and just runs through everything, all the dangers. He's just jumping off the map and landing somewhere you didn't even know you could land. Really interesting stuff. I like the speed run stuff.

I like speed running too. There's not even a morsel of a desire to be good enough to compete with those guys. No. The investment that it takes, the talent. There's a 99% chance that I could try for a year and not be competitive and not even be in the scene. So you're not even enjoying the game anymore. Like it's not about like playing the game and enjoying the game.

It's about like playing it in this really obscure kind of way where there's a tiny group of people who will be interested that you've mastered it in this really obscure kind of way where there's a tiny group of people who will be interested that you've mastered it in this way i it's not it's a very small field of highly competitive people in this rough yeah i really enjoy um like two types of games i like the single player experience where you can kind of go like where you can kind of go like uh brain dead and just go on this adventure i love rpgs you know like skyrim and fallout where i can kind of go like brain dead and just go on this adventure. I love RPGs, you know, like Skyrim and Fallout where I can just, this is my guy I'm going to explore and I'm going to loot. I'm going to progress. And I like the storyline a lot, you know,

learning what's going on and really feeding into that and sort of role, actually role-playing in a role-playing game. And then I like competitive, collaborative, cooperative, I should say, games. I like getting my three or four friends together and us working in PUBG or any Battle Royale. The Battle Royale really lends itself to that sort of mindset of working together as a team to accomplish a goal. Rust also. Rust more than anything. Rust is still my favorite game of all time.

I just shouldn't play it. It's not good for my health it requires way too much time you know to to be good at that game not just the gunplay but just you know minding it's like those games that you can get on it's a game that rewards time in game massively and it punishes noobs like like there's no tutorial in pub g when you click on an item it tells you what it does you know like like even like a magazine or a weapon attachment like a vertical grip that would go on your assault rifle if you left click it it'll be like ah this is a vertical grip it aims in reducing vertical weapon recoil you know not great for horizontal rep weapon recoil no this is

an angled grip it does both the same time but to a lesser extent a little bit of this and a little bit of that in rust it's like go yeah good luck how did that guy get a flint gun you figured it out someday i didn't know how to make any yoka for the longest time you know like i didn't i was like how do they get them i don't i don't know you know you you're not taught anything you're not told anything you really just have to delve into youtube and start learning and start researching online little things like efficiency with explosives you know how to use how much explosive it takes to get through a stone wall versus a metal door. We would get on top of someone's base with a hammer, and when you've got the hammer out,

you can view the stability of a specific building square. Based on the stability, you might be able to find their tool cupboard, which is basically the master key to their whole base. Once you take that and put your own, now you can build there so you can just wall yourself in and sort of eat at your leisure no one teaches you that there's

no tutorial to that you just got to figure it out as you go and then the weapon fucking recoil is this snaky pattern like in pub g you pull straight down with your mouse like i'm pretty decent at it like i'm i'm not at some sort of fucking choco taco level or shroud level where they just seem to be able to just laser people but especially with the easier guns like the m4 and the scar and and and uh the ak with that compensator like i know how hard how to drag the mouse i can i can compensate quite well i can stay on target but in that game the best players have mastered this sort of s snake pattern where you're pulling down and going left and right it's like down to the left for four shots down to the right for three shots down the left for four shots

and they've got it so perfect that if if you tried to go into that game and shoot the aka like you probably see people use the aka and you're like, god damn, that looks like it's another level. You wouldn't even, if you literally, if you, Woody, started playing, I would not recommend that you get an AK at all. You would want to use the SAR, the semi-automatic rifle, because it's just sort of up and down recoil

and semi-automatic and it's decent. The AK is almost impossible to use. I've watched, there's a YouTuber named Stevie that I really like. He's great. The way that he does his storytelling is fantastic. And he jumps in and uses the AK and he's a good player, but he wasn't good in that moment. And he's just goofing.

Yeah, you know, best AK spray NA. He's dead. Yeah, there's a few guys. I can't think of the guy's name right now. Maybe Waylon, but he just doesn't use the AK. He knows there's a few guys. I can't think of the guy's name right now. Maybe Waylon. But he just doesn't use the AK. He knows he's not good with it. He won't use it.

Those guys will use like the... I haven't played in so long, I can't even think. But the M4, whatever that's called. The military rifle. That one's easy to use. But you can't craft it. You can't learn to make it and then make your own you've got to buy them a scrap they're like 500 scrap each or something like that and that's it's

pretty fucking expensive rust stories never end on a high you're watching the wrong guy then i don't know i've watched a lot i'm more than you might be guessing watch b chills watch ramsey or watch um ramsey is an more of an old school guy but he's very beloved in the community i think he had some personal shit going on in real life and like he hasn't made videos in like a year so that's a thing but if you go back to his old videos you'll watch about 40 of them and you'll get to the last video he made and you'll be like there's no more it's like when you watch lord of the rings twin towers and you were like the fuck i gotta wait another year to figure out how to wait till christmas 2003 what happened to me was stevie i like so stevie healed um like every wipe will be two or three episodes of a series and i just went through this library of his watching video after

video just soaking them in to the, it's damaging my sleep schedule I'm watching this. And to Stevie, if this somehow gets to you, I have YouTube Red, so you're welcome. And I'm watching just all of his stuff, and then I catch up to current day, and I'm like, what? Now I have to watch like one video a week?

Like, this blows. Waylon's videos are, he has his own play style where what what he does a lot is he'll just join a server so what we do is we join at the beginning of the wipe everybody's fresh and we hustle and we work hard to like get to mid-game stuff so we can start taking the monuments so that we can get our military weapons so that we can really snowball and keep progressing as fast as possible to explosives so we can kill over all of our neighbors and have a safe zone around us and get our walls etc etc it's all about killing them and protecting ourselves it's it's it's swords and armor essentially you know more swords more armor more swords more

armor better swords better no friendly neighbors that's not a thing you do uh it depends like like there are sometimes but but even when there are friendly neighbors like in the back of our heads we're like but if we snowball hard enough we're killing them you know like like like like nobody's working as hard as us so like if we snowball hard enough that we've got enough explosives to take them out while they're offline we're gonna go take their shit you know it's just there's shit over there and we want shit so we're gonna go take their shit uh like it's it's good to have a pact with them so that every time we step out our door it's not just you die no you die like i want to be able to walk outside it's like hunger games

you have packs with them but there's one winner exactly exactly that and whoever breaks our deal first is the winner. Usually. It's good to have a non-aggression pact with them. But in the back of everyone's mind, I would say, there's this thought that eventually something's going to happen and you've got to go down. But what Waylon does, he joins mid-wipe. Everybody else has bases and they've got cool shit.

And he does what's called eco-raiding, where he finds mistakes that you've made in your base build. And he'll build his twig bullshit outside your base if you didn't build an external tool cupboard, which would prevent him from building that. And he'll jump over your wall into your compound, and he'll have very little on him. He doesn't care if he dies. He's like a bunch of woody chopped and an axe and that's about

it and he'll find little weaknesses in your base it's like oh if i go here and i take a stone a metal a wooden spear i can poke through the window frame and hit the inside of the wall. Well, I only need 37 wooden spears to break that wall. That's only 45 minutes of my life gone away. Click, click, click. He'll do that tedious shit. And of course, with video editing, you're like, clickety-clack. And the wall's gone. And we're in.

And there's gold everywhere. It's fun to watch those types of videos where he'll just ruin people's lives with wooden spears and bullshit like that. I've seen that kind of raid. know it's fun to watch those types of videos where he'll just ruin people's lives with with wooden spears and bullshit like that i've seen that's pretty cool what is this taylor uh it's something that she shared with us it's called uh i don't i don't like this video oh is it not funny honestly it's not i'm gonna spoil it for you just because i just because we can watch it if you want. Basically, this super hot girl. Can I read the title?

Yeah. Group of girls run up on one girl for allegedly stealing boyfriends, attacking and harassing her, then face cruel karma almost instantly. First of all, most of that's accurate except for the cruel karma part. The girl is super hot and she's with a dude who's like a full three inches shorter than her and he's happy to be there and these other three girls who are not nearly as hot as her are all harassing her and like i think they like throw something in her face or something and like they're really coming after like beat her up for like talking to their boyfriends supposedly and this guy's giving her a

ride home and like one of the girls even comes up in like sucker punches the super hot girl like through the truck window the karma is when the guy drives off in his flatbed pickup it rolls over one of the girl's legs but she hops right back up like oh this looks familiar i think i've seen this before like i watched this a few days ago and familiar i think i've seen this before like i watched this a few days ago and like like frankly i was disappointed at the end i wanted the bad girls to i wanted the dude to beat the girls up it's what i wanted because i felt like they were obnoxious and they were being very threatening like they were really like three of them against the one girl that they were clearly jealous of like they needed a beating and the guy didn't give it

to him i yeah i think i saw this a couple years ago the videos from a few days yeah kyle nailed it that it's just so so the um there is a video i might have been in china or a chinese restaurant or something but uh a bunch of girls are beating up on that one girl and there's been a bunch of girls are beating up on that one girl. And there's been a bunch of edits of it. Like, you know, it's that I need a hero. The guy comes like flying through the air, beats up five girls at a time.

And it's just like, Oh my God, this guy used his, his powers for good. I saw the classic version of that the other day where like, I don't even know how many black girls are beating up this guy's girlfriend like it's like a it's like 15 girls are beating up one girl and the dude shows up and a few of the girls try to square off with him like come on he's like all right and he's just laying him the

fuck out like one after another just just punched him square in the face. Just right cross for you and a jab jab for you. He's laying him the fuck out. One of my favorite plots in the world. I saw the lion version where there's a bunch of female lions being harassed by hyenas. And then the guy comes like doing that like guy lion strut. He's got the big mane. And all of a sudden smack that bitch up starts playing it's like smack that bitch up and apparently the the it's it's from like a series so people

knew the plot and that lion picked out the head of the pack of the hyenas and made an example out of him for messing with his is there a name for female lions? Like lionesses? Yeah, for messing with the lionesses and just kills the leader of the hyenas. It's the same plot as these two other shows. It's great. Love it. I like this video better. Chiz also recommended this one. Chiz often has great recommendations for us.

He sends us all kinds of links before the show. And this is just two upstanding ladies. It's called A porch bottle two women fighting a knife mention in blood on there you go freak out these are a few of my favorite things only 49 seconds long you guys ready i'm cute ready set play these women are not in the same weight class the one on the bottom tried to throw on a triangle i like that the bitch who is on top right now dominating Leave me the fuck alone! Leave me the fuck alone! I'm telling you! I'm telling you!

Bitch, I'm going to stab you the fuck up! I'm going to stab you the fuck up! Leave me the fuck alone! Get out of here. Fuck! I don't fuck with none of y'all bitches! I'm going to fucking kill y'all out here, y'all! Damn! Dude, I'all. Damn.

I'm going to fucking kill y'all. Dude, I could read that woman. She's like, listen, I decided that we're both in agreement that I should leave. But you're standing in front of the steps. Like, what am I to do? Climb over the railing? The big girl, who's already winning the fight handily, grabs a beer bottle out of a nearby trash can and starts hammering the little one and it doesn't break no they don't break no they're much tougher than

the movie version and i like that she was tactical with the bottle she's got hand on the woman to keep her down gives her two quip rap raps on top of the head then realizes her hands are in the way covering. So she goes underneath and gives her the old nose down. The beer bottle uppercut. She's doing uppercuts with the beer bottle. And then that one, the skinny bitch, or I guess the bitch that's not 500 pounds, goes up in there and the guy

is standing there, that skinny guy in the tank top. She's like, my face bleeding? It's my face bleeding? He's like, get out of here. That guy's the cool guy of the clip.'s like i got weed and shit you got to go you gotta get out of here man that is true though like that big fat bitch she didn't need to bring weapons into the mix she was already she was the one on the stairs was tapping out you know how hard it hurts to fall on concrete stairs? A lot. It hurts a lot.

The comments are great. Top comment is, might I suggest you leave that lady the fuck alone? Apparently some people don't like to be fucked with. And that big fat lady was wearing some weird patterned shirt, like the way they used to paint warships in World War II to accuse you how far away they were. She's coming right for you. She's already here. Oh, they're from New Jersey. I'm proud. Yeah, that...

Man, that fat bitch, you could have had a nice undisputed tally in the W column if you didn't bring weapons into it. You already dominated her. We don't know how it started, but we know the video starts with the small woman being

splayed out on the hood of a Sentra, getting her shit kicked in. Am I the only one that saw the small woman try to throw in a triangle? Am I alone in this? I thought it was just like panic kicks. It was panic kicks. There's no way she knew what a triangle was. Look, i'm freezing it for these guys bam she she's working on the triangle

doesn't i think you're right though she's just trying to lock down an arm she just wants the pain to stop so i i public freak out is a great uh subreddit that's where this clip came from here's another one it's short and to the point and makes no fucking sense at all wow so this one easter bunny goes effing nuts it takes place in a hospital ready set play it's just it's just crazy black easter bunny wailing on himself what the fuck was that wow probably meth or some sort of amphetamine i would wager someone in the hospital going crazy what was the volume i didn't play volume on it it was there was no he wasn't yelling or anything it was just him. You just heard the of the hospital bed tilting back.

You think he's on drugs and he's just, I don't know, getting into the feeling of that head movement? I have no idea. He might be on some kind of amphetamine or upper drug. I don't know. I mean, he was wearing an Easter Bunny costume.

I found another video of this fucking incel. You know when you go to like a Six Flags, Disney World or whatever, and you go on a ride, and it takes those pictures of you, like going, woo, with your family and everything. And they try to sell those bitches for like $18 a piece. Yeah. This guy is just recording his picture. He's just like, well, there it is. Clickety-clack.

And the guy behind the counter is freaking out. He's like, no! No! He's losing his shit trying to block it. He's so concerned. I make $9 an hour and I'm really invested in keeping you from stealing a photo. What the fuck? That's the biggest scam ever. Yeah, link it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, I will.

It's, uh... ... That's the biggest scam ever. Yeah, link it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, I will. It's... Yeah, I need to do that last ad. It's Smart Mouth. Everyone hates talking to someone with bad breath, that humid, awful smell that keeps you from focusing on anything other than finding an excuse to leave. Now just think about all the times that you were the gross, smelly one and the other person was thinking about how to try to get away.

You probably can't think of any examples. That's because we rarely have an accurate read on our own bad breath odor. In other words, you could be walking around with trash mouth and not even realize it. Not even realize that you're grossing everyone out. That's why SmartMath was invented. SmartMath's clinically proven two-liquid formula combines to instantly eliminate bad breath and prevent bad breath from returning all day.

Rinse once in the morning for all-day clean breath and once before bedtime to prevent morning breath. Just two rinses a day and you'll never have bad breath again, guaranteed. Whether it's the boardroom or the bedroom, having confidence in your breath spells success. Go to SmartMath.com slash PKA. Now for a coupon,

you can find SmartMath products in the oral health dial at Walgreens, CVS, Target, Rite Aid, Amazon, Walmart, or wherever you shop. Once again, that's smartmouth.com slash pka for your coupon. Get your coupon. Your coupon. And get laid with good breath. Coupon. Coupon.

Coupon. Extreme coupon. Coupon. Extreme couponing. Extreme couponing. Those people could get a part-time job with the amount of time they spend looking at USA Today or Mother's Weekly or whatever fucking rag they're cutting shit out of for five hours a day. Just save 60 cents.

And the only ones they ever show are like, I went to the grocery store and they gave me 30 that amazes me like i don't know the actual couponing amazes you yeah like they've developed a skill they're working the system nowadays i don't know if slick deals.net is still a thing have you ever been there yeah uh no, it's a website. So in the early days of e-commerce, they would sometimes make mistakes, you know, like, Hey, $50 off this black and Decker thing and 50% off. And people would find ways to combine these different coupons and promotional like deals that maybe they didn't mean to do. And, uh, I remember my air compressor, I got that. I don't know. I got like $1,800 worth of

stuff for $400 once. These were tools to stock a shop. It was on Slick Deals. I don't know if they still do it, if it's as successful as it used to be. What do you see, Kyle? How to clear out a food place. That's what this video is called. Are we not going to...

Oh, wait. This video you linked is only like six seconds long. I'm just going to watch it on my own. I'm going to watch it with the people. What a loser. Like he's getting a percentage on those photos. I do enjoy his enthusiasm.

Like you're the sheriff of the ninja ride. Come on dude That guy takes his 37 pieces of flair pretty seriously as well He does Well yeah It's actually a 37 piece minimum We encourage people to go beyond that That's such a depressing movie

This next video is how to clear out a food place And this guy just takes a fucking rat into a restaurant and turns it loose. This guy sounds pretty cool. He does. I'm ready. Ready. Let me line it up as perfect as possible.

I like how they don't say restaurant just food place. Ready, set, play. Let me hold it He's got a rat In like a little terrarium Let me hold it Let me hold it

I mean he's Really showing that he brought the rat in He doesn't give a fuck Yeah he's This is the least of my crimes to date I stole this rat Yeah, he's... This is the least of my crimes to date. I stole this rat. Did he throw the rat?

No, he threw the rat. Why would he do that? We out. We out. Black people are afraid of three things rats snakes and magic i thought for sure the third one was going to be gay people they hate the guy was going to be not afraid of them they have found a good cure for the gay people it's usually some violence but they are definitely terrified of any sort of

rodent as you see right there like if somebody turned that big white rat loose in a restaurant and I was eating my pizza I just wouldn't even get up yeah wouldn't flinch I might keep an eye on it if I saw them release the rat I'd be okay, this rat did not come from the kitchen. If I see a rat crawl out of there, the kitchen area, then yeah, I'm going to leave.

But this also could be a very high IQ dining and dashing maneuver. I'm going to start keeping a pocket rat with me every time I go out to eat. So they're like, well, I'll have my check. Whoa! Oh! Now that I think about it, I'm going to have to have a lot of rats at home to have a new pocket rat every time. Or I'll be like, all right, I'll take care of this rat problem for you as long as you comp the bill.

Rats are cheap. The real money is in the ecosystem, the cages, the bedding, et cetera. You could just stop by PetSmart on the way to the restaurant, right? Get your pretty girl on Tinder. If she's the sort that releases rats with you, then you know she's a keeper. That's a true keeper.

If she's trashy enough to dine and dash on a $51 meal by releasing rats into the shanties girl she's coming to fucking sizzler with me we're releasing rats together couples that release rats in public places together stay together that's pretty fucking funny i i don't i want to know that guy came in so brazenly though That's pretty fucking funny.

I don't, I want to know that guy came in so brazenly though. Shoulders swaggering like, yeah, this is what you get. Almost like a vengeance. I want to know maybe, maybe they get, he ordered a pizza or something and they gave him like a gluten free crust and

it tasted terrible. That would be an appropriate response then. Or maybe he wanted meat lovers and they forgot to put the Italian sausage on. These are just valid reasons. I'm thinking, I don't know why i'm assuming this is a pizza place it clearly is not a pizza place they really were terrified of that fucking rat though and i'm i just couldn't care less about a little white rat and yeah they acted they acted like it had the bubonic plague or something and they put that rat with me in the ring it's gonna wish you you hadn't placed it in the ring with quite a stomping

quite a good stomping did you guys see the game of thrones tattoos that the girls got i don't know all the actresses names no here i'll show you oh like uh sansa and aria and them sansa aria and and Fanny. They're pretty good, I think. I'm interested in your opinion. I wonder if I can resize this. Well, those are regretful.

You think? I know. Yeah, I don't think these are very good. The no one is the worst. Yeah, no one is terrible. It's in red. Looks like it's infected. It looks like it's infected it looks like it's infected like somebody's a dirty fucking herpes needle to give her a tattoo that says

something fucking stupid uh the dragons are kind of cool um i think it's the best of them all and the pack survives like like your character was lame as fuck sansa we hated you for for 90 of this fucking series. Yeah. You suck, Sansa, and you should feel bad about it. Get that mole cut off. Get that mole cut off. Where is her mole?

You flat-chested bitch. He's not even... Ha ha! Get him! Get him! Go off, King! That's so dumb. I like... You're on her face!

Does she? I don't see it. I like all these tattoos. I actually think the dragon one is my third favorite. I think the pack survives is my favorite. But no one is kind of minimalist. I wish it was even smaller maybe. Or maybe not so easy to see.

No one is retarded. Really? Oi, bruv, which one is she? Oh, she's the one with no one over the back over here you have to take a finder fucking she trained in bravos yeah but like not for real i like the idea of like memorializing something super most people don't have anything as significant in their life as being a star on the game of thrones right that it's a big thing. And I feel like, you know, if you did that, if you nailed that, it's tattoo-worthy in my head.

So what are you going to do? And all of their choices, I think, are not bad. Maybe I don't love the location. Most of them. You know, I want it to be more hideable, especially if you're living as acting. Yeah. That was what jumped out at me as well.

As far as hideability, the no one is the easiest but still it's just dumb all right what what are you laughing at chis just linked this wings tweet and and i looked at wings twitter for the first time in like a year and a half or something like that and i see he he's got the Mustang logo as his background. And he's got this fucking picture of him as his profile picture where he's like... It's ridiculous. It's ridiculous. What did he purchase here? He made another... It's an Elgato card. Ah, He bought some sort of 4K Elgato card Or something like that

Who fucking knows I wonder if he'll start uploading to YouTube Because you don't need a 4K 60 frames per second recording card For Twitch Unless I'm mistaken Twitch only does 3500 I think that's why Chiz has linked this

Because he's stupid I think that's why Chiz has linked this because he's stupid. I think. I hate picking on wings. It's fun. I guess he just bought the top of the line one. $350. He keeps talking about being out of money and like I got no money this, I got no money that. No money. But every week he buys another $500 toy. being out of money and like like i got no money this i got no money that way i know money but

every week he buys another 500 toy what did he buy recently um apple watch um he just bought this 400 capture card uh before that he bought some sort of uh some sort of a toy for like a kid what was it he bought some sort of a car or something or a cart or something like that then of course he bought that $6,000 V6 Mustang and sunk another several thousand dollars into it. He set his truck, which is a 2002 Silverado

4x4, was worth $10,000 or something like that. We all looked at it. About $2,500. I was close. I would have said $2,000. Yeah, it's worth $2,000 dude that's an excellent condition by the way we looked up this might be an excellent oh no it's got dents on it right it's got all kinds of issues he just has put in he routinely it seems but like

every year he puts like four more thousand dollars into it or something like that yeah it's it's it's a 2002 like like it's it's almost 2020 he likes it though right like i don't i don't knock him for keeping that truck you know i don't knock you for keeping your truck but you know what it's worth nothing nothing it's mostly why i haven't sold it it's not worth anything to anyone else and i think that i might miss it i still sometimes think about selling it it's worth more to you than anyone would ever pay and that's maybe yeah yeah so um yeah he just off target with the 10 grand i don't know why he would think that but yeah he thinks a lot of his truck um i don't i don't know why uh it's it's good stuff which is why i don't mind you should follow him more you should follow him more you'd feel less sorry for him because you'd see how toxic and awful he is. That's possible.

For some reason, I was just thinking about unions. When I lived in New Jersey, where the unions are strong, I thought very low of them. I always just heard of people who weren't losing their jobs, who clearly, clearly should. People who hurt other people. People who did ridiculously dumb things. know high on cocaine driving trains like the dead song and the the motor came out and was like banging on everything and he didn't notice it was like and they're protecting his job and you see it like teaching and cops and stuff and then i moved down here where there's very little union protection.

And suddenly it was like, oh, those guys that I don't hear anything about anymore aren't so bad. Maybe they did have a thing going on. Maybe they're being taken. Maybe if they collectively bargained, they'd have a better deal. So with me not watching Wings that closely,

it's kind of like I feel about unions now. When you're not so close, they're not so bad. If he just becomes an idea, then it's easy to like an idea. But if you actually watch him and see what he does on a daily basis, and what a sourpuss and a degenerate he is daily, and he'll immediately be like, I'm not a bad guy. I do this and that. And it's like, we just watched you be a degenerate for an hour and a half.

Degenerate? Yeah. Do I know what that word means? Just a terrible person. Just a terrible person. You watch him for just a little while. That's how he interacts with people. That's how he treats people.

Like, I don't know. I don't treat people like that in my interactions. It's that thing we always talked about. I won't talk about i won't say the guy's name but there was that guy that we we went to events with and he would treat me in a certain way he would treat woody in a certain way and he treat taylor in a certain way and it really it was literally a tier system based on how many subscribers we each had and it's like i don't treat people like that people are people like whether it's like, I don't treat people like that. People are people. Whether it's a fellow YouTuber

who's got six million subscribers or it's a fan who showed up to pay hard-earned fucking money to come play paintball with me. You mean we didn't become friends because you were trying to leech off my clout? No. Guilty. I didn't want any of your clout.

You know? I just treat people like they deserve to be treated based on who they are as people and respect everybody based on the respect they earn mostly. But on initial meetings, like everybody gets this sort of like, I like how Richard Ryan put it. He's like, I treat everybody like rock stars. It's like, yeah, you know, he does. He really does. He's always been super cool to me. He's always super cool to everybody.

Yeah. They come second nature to a guy like him. Yeah's just a kind-hearted person yeah i i i do my best to to to live up to that example and and wings just doesn't do that you see him like really mistreat people and and like you know he tears systems a little bit like he's always been that he um i guess in particular online friends he just considers very disposable whereas i think of them as like someone you invest into in relationships that get stronger over time he you know there's 10 more where you came from you know yeah yeah and he just you know he just says things that aren't true like he used to say that he was fps rusher remember that no i don't

remember that no yeah he's he's on recording saying that he's on recording being like like somebody beat him in battlefield and he's like don't you know who i am i've got x amount of subscribers on war god icp i've got x amount of subscribers oh i remember that now pka and i've got y amount of subscribers on PKA. And I've got Y amount of subscribers on FPS Russia. This was before I had Gar on camera. He's pretending like he's the guy who's doing the voices in those quarter million view Call of Duty videos. He's pretending like he is the Russian character guy

who's doing quite well right now on youtube like like you know yeah that's a weird fib to tell it's like it's gonna come out and people will see ah that's not you like clearly it's some other skinny guy represented us in korea though so we can never forget that yep that's the kind of thing i like to let go like because he was he was younger he was 26 but he was a really sheltered 26 right he wasn't a guy who had done and you know in the same way that like i might see a 16 year old and well now that guy's 22 he's a totally different dude that's how i feel about his 26 to 32 yeah yeah that's totally that's true yeah everybody changes a lot in their 20s and then he got that disease that shrunk him from That's how I feel about his 26 to 32. Yeah. That's totally fair. That's true.

Yeah. Everybody changes a lot in their 20s. And then he got that disease that shrunk him from 6'4 down to 5'11. That sucked. That's a terrible disease to have. I wouldn't like that. Yeah. It's the worst disease. Danny DeVito Syndrome.

It's called Liar Syndrome. Yeah. Well, anyway, that's my shit on wings segment for this week so we can we can move on to something else i guess yeah i uh i have a couple things here i've got r kelly of course getting into a heap of trouble on the opposite side of the coin our boy fucking um oh i just spaced out on his name. Epstein Trump. Is his sex? Uh, Kevin Spacey. Kevin Spacey.

Kevin Spacey. Just running through my sex offender list. Going the other way. All charges dropped. Kevin Spacey. Vindicated. Alright? Greatest, second greatest living actor. Alright? Vindicated. Vindicated is a generous way to phrase the kid wouldn't give up his phone for some reason

and pled the fifth on its location so kevin spacey's innocent now i told you i would get away with molesting that boy and where are we today i'm about to go back to the office and molest yet another Secret Service agent. I need to employ someone first to find out which one has the juiciest penis, but that'll only satiate me for a while until the cold allure of a child's unwilling eyes staring into me as I change his life forever forces me to head back on that Epstein plane. That would be so fucking funny if the first thing he did was like, Kevin, Kevin, Kevin, stop.

TMZ, what are you going to do with your freedom? Me and my buddy Jeff are going to go for a flight. The Lolita Express is vacant, bitches. Woo! Lolita Express. I'm going to church at that weird-ass temple on that island. Vindicated. Those kids are 15 now, but i'll make do yeah they should have put that show on

hiatus until they got to the the truth of the matter it was already going downhill dude no it wasn't you keep some fuck shit mouth don't you dare poopy mouth that show was killer man like it's hard to top the first season yes it was killer it's hard to top the first season. Yes! It was killer! It's hard to top the first. It's one of the greatest shows of all time. How many seasons was he in?

Three? Like, three or four, right? I think he did four, and then there was a fifth season, and that was the garbage one. Look, it's hard to top the first season, because you're just being introduced to this shit, and you're learning every step of the way. And then he gets in office, and it's like, well, now what do we do? I loved every season of that show they did get progressively worse but you're starting so goddamned high that even at its worst not counting that season he wasn't in you're still at some of the best shit that's on television unlike game of thrones whereas i

thought that last season was fucking shit and i regret watching it i wish i could erase that from my mind so like the early seasons of game of thrones i'd like to erase from my mind so i could watch them again but last season i want to erase from my mind because i unfortunately watched it the first time yeah but but but even the fourth season of game of thrones of um house of cards was excellent i love that shit but but that last season with just his wife running shit it seemed like nobody knew what they were oh yeah i watched every episode up it was garbage is it like painfully bad i didn't finish it it was like yeah it was hard to watch and it ended on such a stupid fucking note it ended so how did it end i don't care i'm never gonna watch i i've done i've told it before on the show so it like quickly basically

claire kills um the bald guy who was who was was his confidant through everything. Claire murders him in the Oval Office with a letter opener. It's sort of a switcheroo because you thought he was going to murder her despite being pregnant with Kevin Spacey's baby. But he's never on screen. They won't even play his voice in the audio recordings. They have people listen to them with headphones. It's they're trying so hard to distance themselves from the guy who made the

fucking show, the show that even now, when I flip through Netflix and I hover over house of cards, like he's not even on the cover. It's her on the cover, like, like sitting on the Washington monument sort of thing. It's fuck that shit. Fuck that shit. I don't care what he's sitting on the Washington like like sitting on the washington monument sort of thing it's fuck that shit fuck that shit i don't care what he's sitting on the washington monument

or the lincoln memorial i should say oh okay she sat on the washington monument that would be that would be a fucking funny thing it's just her squatting being penetrated by the washington like a what do they call that a judas cradle yeah I'm not familiar with the Judas Cradle. Google it. You'll see that I was spot on with that reference. Judas Cradle. Judas Cradle. Oh, that's the torture thing. Nailed it.

Where they would put you on that wedge and put it right in your asshole and then tie kettlebells to your feet. It's quite the workout. It's quite the workout. Spanish Inquisition. That would have been a tough job in the Middle Ages. Like torture

comer-upper because everybody was just throwing shit at the wall and so much was sticking. That they're like, well, we got this thing here. We put you between two canoes. Put honey all over you then we just

fill your mouth up with cream over and i'm becoming australian now i don't know why that is cream you shit all over yourself and then a bunch of bees eat you from the inside out this guy's like fuck what do i can i put you in a brazen book no fuck that's already a thing what if i just put you on a basically like a steeple and then tie weights to your ass that's when all of the guys on shark tank would go i think you got a great idea man but i'm not feeling like i i think you got a lot more work to be done and then that one bald guy's like actually i'll give you 60 cents for 80 of your company and then i just want one yeah i just want one honestly i'd get up and shake your hand if i weren't so fucking hard right now

yeah like other other torture things like what else could you know what i mean back in the day they must have had people working around the clock figuring out ways to torture did they use like ripping fingernail oh Did they use them all? Like ripping fingernails? Oh yeah, they used them all, I assume. Some of these are just legend. The only one that's a legend is that thing that they put you in that closes, the Iron Maiden.

Iron Maiden, yeah. Yeah, that one's nonsense. That's like a Ripley's Believe It or Not tourist attraction thing. But yeah, they used all those. Thumbscrews are a thing. Seems like there's easier ways to torture people. I could just hit your fingertips with a hammer. You would hate it.

Yeah, but then you don't have thumbs, right? You could just slowly squeeze them in more and more. At some point the person's like, well, you've taken my thumbs now. What's the benefit of telling you? They're gone. But if you slowly are crushing the thumb and like making excruciating yeah it depends why you're torturing someone whether it's for punishment or for fun information or for fun the heretic's fork look at that it's just a big fork

double-sided that that is your neck and sticks to both sides and you have to repent of your sins funny thing i would repent immediately yeah i would repent as they started putting that necklace on me like we can avoid all this what it probably is is like we've heard you were blaspheming our lord it's like all right well what do i do to get rid of this fork it's like just admit you blasphemed him and then we'll take you and crucify you in the public square and it's like oh fuck i guess might as well skip ahead all right yeah the judas cradle that's number two on this list kyle there you go and it looks gruesome in this picture yeah funny thing about the heretics fork though that that's made itself into modern bdsm if you click that link there i see those uh some of these can't be real are you reading the

brazen bull that's absolutely the brazen bulls are real thing let me read it to people the inventor of it was killed in it legend has it that this that during the 6th century bc a brass worker named perilous of athens designed what is arguably the most sadistic torture method to date, the brazen bull. In this device, the victim would be placed inside a hollow brass bull, already a tremendous expenditure of materials, with the fire lit underneath. A system of tubes inside the statue would amplify the victim's screams to sound like a raging bull. The story goes that the tyrant ruler was so appalled by the device that he tricked Perilous into entering the bull

to be its first victim. Who would build a brass bull in this picture, very lifelike, put a fire under it with a system of tubes to amplify it so it sounded like a bull? I mean, they didn't have Netflix and shit. Like, what were you supposed to do for fun? Like, how many stone tablets can you read?

And how many dwarves can you laugh at dancing for you before you decide to move on? Yeah, that's absolutely a real thing. You know, the ancients were really into torture. This is $45 to buy a heretic's fork.

What? You're paying too much for your heretic's fork. It's the link you provided. Yeah, I know but that i don't use that that website i'm going to la to be a actress modeling a heretics fork on a bdsm website she's hot yeah like if you go to uh extremerestraints.com which is the site i do use all the models are fucking hot extremerestraints.com, which is the site I do use. All the models are fucking hot. And they're fully naked.

Often using the devices. What website is this for science? Extremerestraints.com. It is X-rated, though, in case you're going to show anybody. Okay, I won't. Oh, Jesus. Flang seems terrible. Oh, Flang. I thought you went to Extreme Restraints and you were

disgusted, but yeah. Oh, no, I'll'll go to extreme restraints and see if there's anything disgusting to me i didn't i didn't click off of that there's some stuff there's this one thing um i think it's it's called a latrine mask i think where it's like it straps to your face and there's this big like funnel like the kind of funnel you use to like change your oil and so people can like piss in it and go straight into your mouth. It's like, come on. I don't need a device for that. I'll just pee right in her mouth. I don't need a whole funnel

apparatus. Who's going to wash this after we're done? That's fair. Electroshock blade? That's cool. Labia clamp. Labia clamp. A black that's cool labia clamp labia clamp uh a black row five row pinwheel which just looks like like a lawn aerator that you roll on your skin oh yeah i got one of those a rubber pillowcase that sounds sticky and those are gross yeah you don't want that do i want to start off with a

beginner e-stimulation kit or am i the kind of guy that would take to it so quickly that I could get maybe an intermediate? Let me tell you, that thing is not for that. I'm a go big or go home kind of guy. I ordered that thing and the whole kit. And I was like, this will be cool. I had a dildo that attached to it so you could put the dildo in the girl and then zap her.

And I was like, it must be pleasurable. They're selling them right here. She's just like, no, never again. Never again. I'm like, was it really that bad? She's like, grab it. I'm like, all right, I grab it. That was in your pussy.

She's like, yeah. It was? Never again. It's just like, what was I thinking and it came with these pads that you put like that gel on like you're gonna defibrillate somebody and you stick them all over your body and it had like four leads i think and you can put them anywhere and at first i was like hey even if this doesn't turn us on i'll do that whole you know bruce lee did that that's how i like like one of his ab training things. He had this E-stem device. He'd zap his abs. I was like,

throw that bitch on, get a little toned up. It's awful. It's awful to be electrocuted. No, but I don't know. I'm into whatever, but like that. And I think it's called a violet wand,

V-I-O-L-E-T. It's a zapping device for electrocuting people. Not into that. Here's something that might be up my alley. The Jolt Electro Puppy Trainer Shock Collar. It's not nearly as powerful as... I'm in the market for a new anal speculum.

Oh, you clicked the medical devices tab, didn't you? I just went to specials. I went to electrical units. Anal speculums now. They're on sale. $47.97. You don't want that good of a look anyway. I'm not into

the medical devices. Ooh, a magnetic ball stretcher for a mere $120. What do I need magnets down there for? Penis enhancements. Well, I did have Teflon frying pans. Oh, that thing looks like a torch device in its own right. I'm pretty sure you're talking about the one that clamps at the base of the cock, and then it's got this thing around the head,

and it literally stretches the penis, right? No, the one I'm seeing, it's just around. It's like three metal rings around the scrotum. I know what you're talking about. They have another one that's like three nuts, and I don't mean nuts like balls. I mean the nuts that would go on a big bolt and like those like turn together to like increasingly stretch your balls away from your like i don't know your body no i penis enhancements was a whole category

of thing mostly dicks that slipped over your dick so that you would have i guess a better dick yeah yeah those are funny yeah yeah you can get. They have a whole section for cock and ball torture? Yes. C, B, T. All right, let's see what we got in here. Oh, man, none of this looks fun. Pussy. Vanilla.

Oh, one of these is... Go to the cock and ball torture of... Yeah, yeah. I like going hands-free here and pointing out that I've seen all of these items many times. Yeah, go down to the second row on the far right. The stainless steel spiked CBT ball stretcher. It's just pushing your nuts into...

Into like a bed of nails. Yeah. Oh, and look at the one to the left of it it's got your it's like hockey glass smashing your nuts between as your dick sticks through your little it's like plexiglass and wing nuts to like squish you oh i get it ball stretcher you put this around your balls and you fill that little pail up with fucking nickels or whatever the hell oh look at the stainless steel urethral stretcher oh my god whoever invented that should be executed executed they should be $75 for the pleasure of having their pee hole blown out oh my god yeah that is not a pussy

it's not going to go back you ruin your dick hole're going to be leaking all over yourself in the nursing home, even more than the rest. I'm definitely not into that one, yeah. So you left my website, and you went over to BDSMshop.com. I'm not familiar with their categories. This is from the same website you linked. Yeah, I know, but I just linked the first one I found that had a Heretics fork. The ExtremeRestraints.com site is the premier in BDSM.

Yeah, Taylor, you mess around on these rookie sites. That's why you're going wrong. Yeah. This does not look like, oh, man, do you want a remote control electric shock cock ring? I do for $100? Man. Well, it's remote control. A humbler.

So it just hurts your nuts and you can't stand up. It's behind you. It's behind your thighs and it's got your balls squished. So you're on your hands and knees trying not to take too big of a crawl because your thighs would push against it and stretch your balls even more. That is indeed a humbler. If you hook up these remote control audience so that your Chatterbait fans can take control of it, then you'll be making money.

That's what girls do. That's true. Nobody wants to do that with any of us, though. I don't know. I'd chip in a few bucks to do that shit. If you guys put that bitch on, we'll do a little live stream here. I'd be like Mr. Moneybags. Watch Taylor's

balls stretch out. Just hearing Kyle ow, ow, fuck, ow. Knock it off, Taylor. No, this is definitely $500 worth of entertainment. I'm doing it again. Yeah, that's a really popular thing on most of the

dirty girl streaming sites where the cam girls and stuff is the lush it's this uh sex toy you've probably seen it but you didn't know what the fuck it was it's like this pink dongle hanging out of the girl's vagina like a little antenna and uh and and those are like remote controlled through this whole application that you can do on your phone or you can integrate it into like the streaming app so that like people donate money and then they get to take control of the thing for a while. It's a very good sex toy. They're quite expensive, but it's this whole insertable portion

and then this clitoris. When you're running a business, Kyle, you gotta spend money to make money. They got 40 different kinds of nipple clamps. Yeah. This one, the triple power sucker set. I've got that. There's not that many kinds of nipples. Why. Why a nipple set comes in a pack of...

There's not that many kinds of nipples. Why would a nipple toy set come in a three pack? That's a good question. Although I did see... One for the clit. There you go. Let me guess. You're looking at a clear sort of plastic canister

with a plastic wing nut on the top, right? Yeah. That's more of a manila color it's a this one's a white clear kind of want to buy that on amazon instead those are awesome they're really for the nipples or just all around all around mostly the nipples like like it's really funny you just get a little lube on the nipple pop that bitch on and you start twisting until she starts complaining if she's not complaining you haven't gone far enough do you think that you could put Just get a little lube on the nipple, pop that bitch on, and you start twisting it until she starts complaining. If she's not complaining, you haven't gone far enough. Do you think that you could put that over the top of a chigger and suck it out of your body?

I think you might give yourself some sort of a horrible rash or infection. You don't want to do that. You don't want to do that. But it'll go anywhere. I've put it on a chick's butt before and just given her this ass hickey with it before. They're really hilarious. I wonder if it would pop chick's butt before and just given her this ass hickey with it before. They're really hilarious. I wonder if it would pop a pimple.

No. Maybe because it's... You really got to get under the pimple. This is another area of expertise that I'm well versed in. Pimple popping. Jesus Christ. Now, I went back to that

listicle with all of the torture things and the next one was called the breast ripper it's just a pair of hooks it's just a pair of hooks this guy was his torture device was due Monday morning and he woke up early

oh no what would I show the pope today jeez that's not very creative why don't you call it the titty tear Oh, no. What would I show the Pope today? Jeez, that's not very creative. Why don't you call it the Titty Terror? Oh, shit. Ling Chi.

Death by a Thousand Cuts. Rose to popularity in the 14th century. Oof. Oh, that looks awful. Yeah, it's all awful. Not a fan of torture. No. You you know i would say most of these i wouldn't given the choice i wouldn't choose any yeah the chinese torture chair oh i mean it looks cool but you're sitting slicing yourself up yeah yeah no torture for me chinese water torture i feel like of this list i'd much rather do that than have like my tits ripped off or sit on a spike and have a bunch of kettlebells tied to me yeah i mean it's still pretty awful mythbusters

did a whole thing where they like looked into it you know like is this real does this really and it actually like when you watch someone watch it being done to someone it's like oh that is pretty awful because like you've constantly got that drip of water right on your forehead and it's like running all over and you can't dab it away and it's incredibly frustrating and you couldn't sleep you could you just be laying there just constantly being like irritated essentially it would really suck like sure you could do it five minutes or ten minutes or an hour imagine doing like a day and or two days yeah that would once you start to go sleep deprived i can see how you go crazy and it's just always in your eyes and shit and you're just you can't wipe it away like like it would be

pretty awful like like they did it to them they did it to themselves on mythbusters and they were getting very upset yeah that's kind of like how uh waterboarding doesn't look that bad it doesn't like when you're if you're standing on the outside looking in you're like it's just water on a rag but then you like hold your breath and you're like oh fuck that that's real deal shit can't hold your nose yeah it just goes in everywhere it's it's pretty awful it's it's real bad yeah i've never been waterboarded i have this idea that because i'm comfortable in water that i'd somehow be immune but i'm not the first one to have that idea and no one's been right it's like in your like nasal esophagus area like Like there's just, there's always water there.

Like throughout the whole process, there's always water like in your sinuses and in the back of your throat. And you're never able to, like when you're upside down and it gets in your nose, right? Like swimming. Yeah. But you can't clear it.

You can't clear it. It's just there. And you can't get off. You can't catch your breath fully at all. Like there's no, throughout this process, you're never going to get a full breath you're only going to get these half breaths followed by choking and coughing and and it it was awful it was real bad i didn't like that at all back when waterboarding was a topic all the time i tried to get my wife to waterboard me so i could

see what was up she said no no. Come on, Jackie. Be a team player. What if she really enjoyed it, though? Ooh, that is an issue. We waterboarded me for a video, and then they literally said that the footage was too fucked up that we shouldn't upload that. So we went to that chicken pecking my crotch instead, which is a much more lighthearted, funny thing.

I don't know where the footage of me getting waterboarded is. I should ask around and see around see if that how long were you getting waterboarded maybe a minute yeah it seems like that's even a high number like there are a lot of people panicking yeah yeah people who thought they could hold up like yeah i'm probably wrong but i think that i would hold up to it right just because i have a comfort with water. And people like me go into it and last 16 seconds. It was awful. It was real bad. And I knew that I could probably kind of stop it anytime I wanted to.

And still, like, I think the hopelessness of, like, knowing that they're not going to stop no matter what would be a real amplifier. It's different if your enemy is doing it. Yeah. It was Jeremy and Aiden doing it to me so i was like i can picture being like please take it guys guys take it off this is kyle speaking now please pickle pickle pickle yeah yeah it was it was it was some rough shit i did not care for that

um but i thought it was gonna be hilarious for the video but but it turned out to just be really dark you know it's been kind of light-hearted up until now no that would have been a funny part of the video i thought so they did yeah they got final approval on that shit who was it for do you remember it was uh that was when i was uh doing that video game thing it was called uh fps russia very bad day or has a bad day or something it's where like uh we're raising money to make that mobile app i made oh okay okay yeah yeah and uh i got like i accidentally i like fake accidentally blew up um the not moses not mo's brother um but the the little guy that always hung

around with him i can't think of his name right now oh i do remember him though i like blow him up accidentally and uh you know i have i have the rap video that i've like wasted all the mob's money on with those with those girls uh dance dancing in underwear out in the field and me rapping um yeah that was fun that's that's the was fun. That's one of my favorite ones. I really enjoyed doing that. That whole thing was fucking hilarious to me. That was me being able to do whatever the fuck I wanted and just not giving a shit.

Literally, there's girls in their underwear, people dying of accidental explosion, me getting beaten up, masked kidnappers, fucking, and torture. It's like, can you do whatever I want? Yeah, whatever you want. Let's do it.

It's a fun time in life. Can we do a rap video? I've got the security guard who pulls the gun on the deputy here. Let's watch that. I like this. Oh, you were telling us about this one before the show. Yeah, this is pretty interesting.

There's a video and everything. I'm looking for... Are you relinking it? I just linked it. Okay. Let me just add my electrified cock ring to my later list. To my cart.

Yes. Alright. It's a two minute video that we'll check out. I'm ready. I'm going to make the video bigger. Ready, set, play. ...enters the IRS office. He's in full uniform.

Can we start over? I was four seconds in. I didn't know it. Sure. Ready, set, play. As Lucas County Sheriff's Deputy, Alan Gaston enters the IRS office. He's in full uniform.

Very obviously a cop. ...with his badge and his firearm visible. That's a security guy. That's Sheriff's guy. That's the sheriff's deputy. Okay. Look at the security guy. Basically preparing myself to be shot at that moment, bracing for a shot in my back. The whole thing caught on security camera as the guard follows Deputy Gaston to the elevator with the gun out, and it appears his finger very close to the trigger.

The guard then tries to take Gaston into custody, once again with the gun drawn. There's really no way to know how you're going to act when there's a gun pointed at you and when you think you're going to lose your life. Gaston works as a defensive tactics instructor. He says he felt the best way to de-escalate this situation was to walk away. Eventually, Toledo police arrived after getting a 911 call. He's got a gun and he won't leave. But the caller from inside the IRS office never tells 911 the man with the gun is a uniformed deputy sheriff. Gaston's biggest concern as this incident unfolded were the other people inside the office.

If I'm going to get shot, which I felt like I was, it's not fair. They came there to do their business. Gaston and his wife have now filed a civil lawsuit against the security guard, Seth Eklund, and the security company seeking compensation after Gaston allegedly suffered emotional and psychological distress and lost wages. He's currently on medical leave from the Lucas County Sheriff's Department. Get fucked, Seth. He has a message lethal force is unacceptable. Good. The cop seems really cool.

Yeah, the cop seems really cool. He's taking the high road big time. Seth was unable to be reached for comment because Seth is a fucking degenerate incel piece of shit what a loser seth is what a yes seth what a madman retard of the week hope you i was about to say like like do we have an opposite of the cool guy of the week can we have i think they're the same really it changes week to week whether or not we're doing it ironically or if they actually do something cool. Holy shit. This guy's a fucking retard. And it's not like it was a plainclothes cop who came in and had to be like, hey, I'm actually a police officer.

Here's my badge. It was like, dude's decked out. His name's on there. He's got a badge number. The gun's there. The taser's there. He's got the whole, his blues on. Like, what the fuck did he think he was?

How could you possibly see a policeman and not recognize that he's a policeman if you're listening to this on audio only he was fully uniformed he was wearing the policeman costume all right it's like he came in dressed as a cowboy and this guy's asking him what he's doing at the rodeo hey hey cowboys only back here if this guy was a fake cop he would have fooled me yeah and he had all the other cop stuff yeah he had like a taser on him some pepper spray like he had the whole utility belt cooking he he's cheers and then when he went here i hope he i hope he gets some money out of this he's like this is ronnie the security guard which is an excellent reference from the movie Observe and Report,

which everyone should see. It's a Seth Rogen movie with a little bit of date rape in it. All right? Very dark comedy. All right? If you like yourself a taste of date rape, Anna Faris gets it hard and she's passed out. All right?

So Kyle's recommendation of the week, observe and report absolutely yeah it's very good i remember thinking that movie was funny but i don't remember anything about it i think i saw he's a rent-a-cop who wants to be years ago yeah he 10 years ago he's a rent-a-cop who wants to be a real cop and he goes in for his psychological exam and he's he's like well, Ronnie, how are you doing? How are you feeling? I'm doing great. You know, are you on any medication or anything? Well, yeah, yeah. I am medication for bipolar disorder, but a schizophrenia. She's like, oh, but I'm off that now. Well, your doctor took you off? No, no. I just stopped taking it. I just stopped taking it. And how do you feel? Great. I feel like I'm right on the verge of becoming the man, you know, and I just really want to be a police officer. I think it'd be great. She's like, okay. Why do you want to be

a police officer, Ronnie? He's like, that's a million dollar question, isn't it? I have this dream most nights where there's just this big cloud of cancer and pus just coming over the horizon. And everybody on the playground, they just start screaming and tearing their eyes out, pulling their hair out. And they're saying, please help us, please help us. And then I show up with the biggest fucking gun you've ever seen and i just blow everything away and i'm doing the lord's work and then everybody gathers at my everybody in the whole world they gather at my feet and they say thank you thank you ronnie you saved us it. And I say, don't thank me. I'm just a guy with a gun.

I'm just a cop. She goes, oh, I'm just going to write that down. Yeah, yeah, go ahead and jot it down. Well, thank you, Mr. Spears. Thank you mean Officer Spears. Yeah. It's fucking dark as shit. has he still lives with his mom and you know he's like 30 year old at this point he's like um do you think dad left because of me and she's like oh definitely

you just had so many special needs it's it's real fucked up. It's dark in a way that most stuff doesn't go anymore. I mean, there's literally a date rape. And Ronnie thinks that it's true love, but he's just raping a passed out woman.

You know, it's essentially... If we're ever using the legal definition of what a date rape is, that that's what occurs but they make it funny and light-hearted observe and report i think it's on netflix check it out it cannot be good to drink the amount of diet root beer and cream soda that i have the last few weeks oh yeah but it's not going to stop me like you power through taylor don't listen to the doctor power through there's no calories how could it be bad for me science might be point there's also sodium which is good for me

it's true i've heard that strong i've heard that yeah it's like exercise for your circulatory system there you go yeah that's exactly what it is i eat terribly to force my body to learn how to clear toxins uh-huh your goat your belly is weak mine is strong like a billy goats like those people who like expose themselves to snake venom for a long period of time to build an immunity people you build an immunity the guy from princess pride yes that was uh like like light what was that poison called like a sin or something like that it doesn't matter probably i don't i have no idea i haven't seen that movie in forever latakia doesn't make sense oh that's a good movie it is good yeah too bad andre the giant died pretty much exactly when everybody expected him to.

Oh, poor guy. He was a giant. Those people, have you ever seen someone who's 7'5 at the age of 90? No, you haven't. He's a human great dame. They've been dead for 55 years. You just know that going into it. Yeah. Yeah.

Poor Andre the Giant. He had a rough life, you know? He had a hard time. I don't know i just i feel like being a giant solves a lot of problems he suffered tremendously he had a lot of pains um like the physical pain based because of his size his back his knees were excruciating um he sort of couldn't live a normal life without being treated like a freak everybody stared at him everywhere he went um little things like shower heads just didn't work um you know toilets

didn't work uh when he'd fly uh the seats weren't big enough he had to piss in a bucket on the airplane just like out there in the aisle um he was shitting the bathtub at hotels like he was just saying his ass over that giant ass and just release an Andre the Giant sized shit. Who's the leading cool guy so far? I don't know. Andre the Giant. It's between Andre the Giant, that cool ass guy who insulted that little girl, and that lady who locked a cop in her basement. It's neck and neck.

Man, that is so fucking funny. Imagining a 7 foot ten guy or whatever hanging his enormous ass into a normal size tub and just like a toilet bowl and then afterward what do you do waffle stomp it down there's no no solution there other than turn the hot water on and go for a walk and you know those poops are like firewood yeah turn the hot water on k go for a walk. And you know those poops are like firewood. Yeah. Turn the hot water on, Kyle. And let that steam. Let that soak into the

cheap-ass Marriott courtyard wallpaper. Or even worse, you just pull the drain up and close it off. Just like, oh, you had to go. You had to go. Just leave it there. Just leave it in there.

But also if you're Andre the Giant and you shit in the bathtub and you're leaving the hotel, nobody's going to come up to you and be like, excuse me, sir. Yeah, you're coming with me. You're paying for that tub. They may think that's going to happen. And then he comes rounding the corner carrying 10 bags of luggage for all the beer he drinks. And you're not stopping that guy he's too big too strong he would drink an enormous amount of liquor or enormous

amount gargantuan amounts of beer like like cases of beer cases and cases of beer yeah like the way beer cans looked in his hand was hilarious so tiny like they literally look like this they look like like single serving ones yeah yeah if you've ever seen those tiny coca-colas and pepsis they make the little cans they're like three ounces that's what they look like in his fist what a gargantuan human being yeah like in that i never watched wrestling ever but that picture of him next to hulk hogan and he hulk hogan is a very big dude. Yeah. And he makes Hulk Hogan look tiny. Yeah. Like he's three times as wide, twice as broad, a foot taller.

Doubled the weight. His forearms are bigger than Hulk's biceps. You could probably wear his rings almost as a bracelet. His fingers were so fucking meaty. You could put an egg through his wedding ring oh that's that's unbelievable yeah yeah just a gargantuan human being that poor woman yeah or that lucky lady or if you want to look at it dude i don't know if he's still with the shaquille o'neal and his wife his wife is below average in size not just because she's next to him but so she's a short

lady the mountain's uh wife she's a she's a little lady yeah the mountain he's a huge motherfucker yeah he's the strongest man in the world right now so big ups to the mountain no yes okay i think he won the uh yeah one world's strongest man oh i'm going by him. Who's the guy that was on Joe Rogan's podcast? Robert Oberst. Yes. He competes in it, but he hasn't won it yet. I watched some video. Yes, sir.

Let me get this out. I thought Robert Oberst said he got first, but more recently he got third and then he was injured. Does that not sound right? I think he was talking about one event that he got first in, whereas Brian Shaw, yeah, he's the one who's won like the last like four in the last eight years or something crazy thorson julius something or another is is uh the mountain's real name yeah but but half thor julian bjornson half thor yeah

yeah yeah julius bjornson one of those They got something in the water up there in Iceland. Yeah, it's called Good Genes. Those guys are fucking enormous. He's just a fucking giant. He's got really funny commercials, too. Have you seen those? It's for the soda-making machine. Oh, SodaStream.

SodaStream, yeah. He has really good SodaStream commercials. They're great. There's a soda-making machine that you can have in your house, I guess? Oh, yeah. It creates carbonated water, and then you can add little flavors to it. Is it like that thing at Wendy's, like the one where you just pick off the screen?

Well, that thing's $10,000. This thing is like a couple hundred dollars, and you just get cartridges for whatever flavors you want. And they have knockoff names. Instead of Dr. Pepper, it's like Dr. Lightning. Physician's Assistant Pepper. Exactly. cartridges for whatever flavors you want and they have like knockoff names like instead of dr pepper it's like dr lightning physician's assistant pepper exactly mountain thunder registered nurse pepper yeah yeah but but it's like it's it's you know a little cartridge in there and you make your own soda it's it i should get that well i mean you could do whatever you want you

know you could there's there's all sorts of diet flavors and you could just do carbonated water with like uh you know juice or something like that i don't know i usually just like when i do i haven't used it in forever but when i do use it all of those knockoff soda flavors taste terrible they're just like they're just gross like it'll be like diet cola wink and you pour that in there and it's like this is not even vaguely reminiscent of diet coke or diet dr pepper or whatever it's not good so i'll just like make just carbonated water and then put like a lemon and a lime slice in there and put it in the fridge and save onto it it's pretty good i've been drinking uh unsweetened tea gotta double check make sure it's unsweetened and then uh stevia is the sweetener that i've

been using uh and it's it's really good it's like a zero calorie calorie sweetener made from some kind of a plant stevia plant i assume and uh that's what that bitch in breaking bad dies because of right rice no i'm near the end of the show yeah when they're in the diner and she adds sweetener that has stuff oh yeah yeah yeah he puts the rice and in her stevia yeah yeah yeah see ha ha yeah i was just confused well you know you weren't very precise you weren't uh specific at all yeah put some put some lemon in there put some stevia in there and it's it's really fucking tasty tastes like uh you know i like your sweet tea story that's my favorite oh that was hilarious did you tell that on pka

did i think that i think last week yeah okay i thought i told yeah it's just fucking super sweet tea my fucking super duper sweet tea i was just so proud i I was like, Wings is a fool. Not like me. You can see real-time cavities forming. The amount of sugar. People didn't see the show last week. The fast-forward version is Kyle thought he bought unsweet tea, added sweetener to it,

and just unlocked the key to really great-tasting sweet tea. But it turned out he bought sweet tea, added more sweetener to the sweet tea, and it was just, yeah. So tasty. I was like, this is candy. What is he doing drinking sweet tea? And I'm just like, I drank half a gallon of it before I realized my mistake. I was just like, all day I had to have a full glass.

There's tons of ice in it. I bought a whole bag of lemons because I was enjoying it so much. I'm chopping the fucking lemon wedges up and squeezing it in there. It was the best drink ever. No wonder you liked it. Yeah, it was incredibly sweet. Double sweet tea sounds great. I heard Bojangles sweet tea is especially good. Dude, it's not.

Alright, I gotta say, I got two bags of Bojangles sweet tea sitting in there that I don't want any part of. It comes in a bag with a nozzle on the top. Like how Canadians get milk? Exactly like how Canadians get milk. Sick and wrong. The best sweet tea is Chick-fil-A sweet tea

and it comes in regular plastic jugs. So whenever I order some Postmates from Chick-fil-A sweet tea, and it comes in regular plastic jugs. So if I order some Postmates from Chick-fil-A, coupon code down below, I go ahead and add a gallon of unsweet tea to that order, and I've got it. But it's my favorite. Chick-fil-A is the best. I've tried three different grocery store brands,

and they all come off sort of ca caustic and bitter not a fan oh the other i forgot about this this popping back in my head the other day i was driving home from somewhere trying to get well get home and i was in traffic and you know how if you're in a big line of traffic and there's someone trying to exit and take a left into that turn lane you'll like kind of be courteous and you'll create a gap between the car in front of you and where you stop so that you allow them to turn left and get through so they're not stuck so there was this truck trying to get out and so i stopped and was going to try and let him through and it was at that moment that i noticed this man in the f-150 is missing both

of his arms past the elbow both of them like one arm has like a little chicken wing kind of hook at the end of it and the other one's got nothing he's got it's a man in there no arms no arms and he's gonna turn by my car he needs a tesla as as soon as i see him like leaning forward to do the no arm turn like this like doing stuff like that like i can't i can't not look and he saw me looking but i did that i still wanted to look because i wanted to see how he was going to make the turn and he made the turn expertly like almost as though he's used to not having arms you know silly me like in that situation i'm thinking like has he done this before like so clearly he has he turned into the place but that guy surprised me goes to show you don't even need arm to drive

better than a woman i love your moral of the story so there you go jesus christ yeah that was that made me sad though because like his arms were all like skinny and fucked up too because like how are you gonna lift stuff and like ah i was driving with someone like a year ago and we basically had to turn around that's it and you know how to turn around you can hit a u-turn or if you need to like make three rights or you know like the thing yeah so um or i guess three whatever this person did it wrong like we needed to turn around they went right and then they went into the like the parking lot and they spun around there for an awful long time and then they come back on the road and we go the same direction we started

and i'm just like i can't like look i don't pretend to be some sort of, you know, NASCAR driver, but I know how to turn around. And, and in this level of like craziness is unrelatable to me. And that's how I like to think of myself as a top tier Turner, right? Yeah. Top tier,

a triple threat, TTT, top tier Turner. I thought I was at least an average driver in the Tacoma, but now that I have a full-size truck, I might be below average. I just... I don't know. I don't hit the parking lot every...

You pull in a spot, I have to correct it, readjust sometimes. I can tell you. I was driving a friend's Hyundai Elantra or something probably eight ten months ago and i was parking because they'd been drinking and i was i felt like i could enter the world championship of parking in that thing where it was like you know go full speed just right into the spot perfect distance between the white line and my doors nobody's banging into me and giving me you know no parking lot gremlin's giving me a a ding but even though my wife's forerunner like i

feel like i can see where all the corners are that's kind of cool like it doesn't just stop like way on top of the car in a weird way uh and then small cars like you said are amazing but something about my f-150 has taken me a while to adjust yeah it takes a little while to get used to driving something that's a little bit bigger i've definitely got my car down like i can i always get right into a parking spot spot kind of perfectly like i don't slow down like if there's like if i'm parking between two cars i can just go in there the camaro you mean yeah yeah like with the taco i do that and not only between the lines but like centered between the lines i feel like that was kind of normal for me in the ford it's just not

and i have this uh i have cameras all over it that simulate like an overhead view still sometimes it takes a fix it just does look car. Okay. So this is a kit car. You buy this kit, and you get everything, I think, except for the engine, the transmission, and the rear end. And I want to say it uses a Corvette drivetrain, which are those parts. You get those parts. They're not cheap, but they're less than $10,000.

This is $25,000. I wish this was your dad's hobby. The old cars are cool, but if you could slip one of these in... This is about to be dad's hobby. Is it? Yeah. We're going to have to get one of these.

I'm pretty fucking into this. I've been looking at this for a little while. I've been on this website before. You may have pointed me to it. Yeah, this is a bad motherfucker. This is a bad motherfucker. Like, this thing with that LS6 Corvette engine in it, it's insane.

Zero to 60 in 3.2 seconds. Corvette brakes bring the GTM to a clenching halt at only 111 feet from 60 miles an hour. Street tires deliver over a G on the skid pad. Those all sound like good numbers. You're getting a supercar. You're getting a supercar for less than $50,000. With everything done. There's a lot to do here. The kit is 25 to

start with so yes and then you said 10 more for the corvette parts i'm i'm i'm estimating but yeah i think you'll be able to get good stuff for that i think maybe it uses a uh a porsche it says here um gm kit gives you everything you need to build your car except for running gear parts um they use like anywhere from a 97 to a thousand 2004 chevrolet c5 corvette and transaxle okay that's even cheaper like if you if you get one from i thought it was it needed to be one of the real modern ones um the major corvette parts include the engine the front and rear control arms suspension brakes and the fuel tank okay that's getting a little bit more expensive yeah there's some uh options i would really want like heat and ac you live in georgia ac is really nice um yeah that's

ac is pretty cheap like i've added ac to like 55 chevrolets and stuff at 400 something like that well there's an option for 1350 the gt heating and air conditioning kit okay that's here let me give you a well Well, just click order, and you'll see the options. Just pull down a bit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But yeah, I'm considering doing one of these. I think that my dad and I could put this together

in three months or something like that, and I'd have a goddamn supercar. That'd be neat. For fairly affordable. Doing all of our own work, I'd do all the paint, probably do a lot of the interior and upholstery stuff the seats are pretty simple just do racing seats racing harnesses and uh you know throw some sort of simple like um sound system in there i gotta have radio but

other than that like it's a goddamn supercar it looks insane it looks like it costs a hundred thousand dollars or more if you told me it was a quarter million dollar car then i'd be like yeah that's what they look like yeah a million dollar car they look like that yeah yeah so i've been looking at that for a little while there's a few kits on this website that appeal to me but that one by far is the most outrageous i mean it's a rear engine supercar it's it's crazy lately like all these cars appeal to me yeah all of them appeal to me the supercar might be my favorite but that type 65 coupe the blue one with the one on it is i was about to say yeah that one's attractive to me too the roadsters are a little bit small for me i think um but those look cool too the 818 um there's like three different versions of that but those look

fucking cool uh they look like something you'd want to take out on a track to really experience what they're capable of but i just want to drive in traffic in this thing right i just want to take this thing out on the highway looks so cool oddly the supercar might be the easiest to live with or maybe the 818 yeah i don't know i don't know that the roadster to me, like the, the little tiny, um, roadster thing that looks like, uh,

the, the Shelby Ford or whatever, that looks too tiny for me, honestly. Like, like it doesn't have a roof. It does not have a roof. I just,

I think, uh, noise bothers me more than average people maybe. And, uh, I just like being inside. I always have my windows up. That's just my way of driving.

Yeah. So I'm thinking about getting one of those. I'm going to do some more research, obviously. I need to go to the salvage yard and see what those Corvette parts would be. But I don't think they'll be that expensive, especially if I... I don't need this thing to literally be a supercar. Like, an LT1 Corvette engine would be fine. Looking like a supercar is the point of being a supercar.

There you go. I don't plan to go, like, fucking Fast and the Furious and race anybody. I'm not going to take this thing to the track. Can you? Like you'd literally have to go to a track to extract every bit of, you know, you can't do it around Raleigh. Yeah. Kind of fast is fast enough.

My car is kind of fast. And it's plenty. I never floor my car. I never go as fast as my car can go. You know, like it sounds good. And it looks nice. That's what I'm going for. And that go as fast as my car can go. It sounds good. It looks nice. That's what I'm going for. And that's all I need this thing to do.

So I don't need to get the brand new latest and greatest Corvette engine. I don't need super fancy brakes and stuff like that. I could skimp on that stuff and still have a really fucking fast car, but just not a race car. You might need to... I mean, i'm out of my depth here but in my head i'm like you want to buy a donor corvette you know something that's totaled for some reason and there'll be a million things you get out of it the axles the brakes the you know tubing for hvac i don't know but having a whole donor vet might be nice maybe so i i've seen those for uh under 10 um that have been really hit hard like like really fucked up like beyond the point of like a simple repair job like the whole sides caved in and you know like the seats ruined and

youtube bought one and every body panel was just ruined like the carbon fiber didn't hold up to sun well and it was peeling in a way that you couldn't just repaint and carbon fiber might have complicated the painting and he got it really cheap it's like that would be a beautiful donor car yeah yeah something like that but i think that'd be a fun project to work on for one thing and then the end result looks insane i mean fucking cool as shit um i would it might be a little more expensive like i'm i'm just thinking about all the unexpected costs like tires and wheels on this if you wanted to look like a supercar could end up being five grand or something you know yeah yeah if you can't just use some corvette wheels or something like that like i don't know i don't know i'd have to

i'd really want to spec it out to know what I was getting into before I got into it. If I'm going to have like a car that looks nice, but like doesn't have air conditioning and like doesn't have decent carpet in it. And I'm going to be in for 38,000. I don't think that's what I'm looking for necessarily. No, you want something you can actually drive,

right? Like if you had a really, really neat, fun go cart in the garage, well, how often do you pull that out? Yeah, and that's kind of, I have that. I don't pull it out too often. So I would probably just get a new Mustang or something.

Rather than do that, if I'm going to be in it for that much. New Mustangs are fucking sick. They sound so nice. And I rented one for a trip I went on like a year ago. It was so nice. And I rented one for a trip I went on like a year ago. It was real nice. I had the, I think I had the four cylinder, like the turbo charged four cylinder. I don't know if it's turbo or super, honestly, but it was the, whatever the hot rod four cylinder version was, it had like eight different driving modes.

It had like, and I was just playing around with them and it was fast as fuck. It wasn't as fast as my car, but it was real fast for a four cylinder and it still sounded good. And, uh, it had a few little creature comforts that I appreciated more than my car. The steering wheel was squishy. They're really nice. I,

when I bought my truck, I sat in the Mustang. Like it was a good one, one they put in the showroom for a while. And, uh, and I would just, I can see why people would buy it is really nice.

Yeah. Yeah. They feel nice. Um, and, they handle really well and you can see out of the back of them a little bit better than you can my car you can't see shit out of the back of my car yeah i've gotten used to it over time but like my dad sat in my car once and he was like fuck this i got back out do you some of your mirrors have like blind spot detectors no oh my truck has that and when i got it i thought it was just a silly luxury i can't see like there's just i don't know there's a shit in the way maybe it's the seats i'd have to look again but i depend on those now yeah i've i've been in that car long enough to kind of know my way around like the blind spots and where to look it helps to go faster than everybody if you go always go faster you just

you know you're kind of wiping them clean your blind spot i just passed that guy now i know it's cleared and uh and you know i'll turn my head and look out the window if i have to like like i one thing i'll never do is side swipe into somebody i fucking turn around and look dude if this car is next to my truck i don't see it that could be a problem yeah i want to i want to make sure it's loud as fuck like a harley pass everyone all the time i don't know yeah i just thought those were cool though i've been looking at those for a couple weeks now i started out looking at those um factory five little roadster deals and then i found this thing and i was like that's what go yeah i've never rebuilt

a car but it's gonna project like you know on my mind i've done it with an off-road buggy i've done a lot of work on that so i have you know maybe the skill set someone who's never done it should enter with and uh yeah this is a really neat Yeah, it would be a lot easier than some of this. Like the stuff we've done in the past is often just, you've got to strip the paint off and then you've got to strip off body work that somebody else did 15 years ago, 30 years ago and 50 years ago.

Like literally with one of those 55 Chevrolets we restored, there was like three different eras of dent repair on it. There was fiberglass, bondo, and lead. It dated back to a time where you would pour lead into the fucking dents and like shave it off. It looks like a cheese grater, but it's for lead. I've seen it on TV. I've never done it.

Yeah. And so, had to get that out. But this is all brand new. Carbon fiber on like aluminum. It should bolt right up to the frame it comes with it should be it bolt yeah yeah this is simple stuff and that like you said you'll buy some seats probably comparable to the chair you're in and you just mount them that's not hard i've done that actually weld the tags in yeah that's all easy shit yeah yeah that's uh that that shouldn't be hard at all i don't i don't know what the hard part would be um to paying for it i so i i haven't done it from scratch but like sometimes it's just

weird shit like you know big things go well and you get tons of progress and then you spend two and a half days just on the gas and brake assembly pedals you know just mountain those right oh yeah some of that stuff is is real time consuming especially if you've never done it before um like the first time we did a wiring harness it was like oh my fucking god what have we gotten ourselves into like redoing the wiring harness on just a regular three 350 chevrolet engine it's like how many pages is this like like what what how many of these wires do i really need you know it's just a it's a huge like like the the bundle is like this it's intimidating to look at yeah it's very and it's not cheap

like like like like the wiring harness itself was i don't know how much it was it was over a thousand i remember that and it was just like this all has to be fucking plugged in and hooked up you think you'll really do like layouts 50 50 20 chance-50, 20% chance, 80% chance? I would say 50-50. I'm going to talk to Dad about it and see if he's into it and he wants another project. Because if he doesn't want a project, then we're just not going to do it. I'm not going to do it by myself.

Because part of it would be wanting him to do the paint work because that saves me like $5,000 right off the top. You should just start it and struggle and hope he takes pity. He would, but I won't do him like that. He absolutely would. Make me a bad guy, sure. I'll see if he's open to another project. He might be like, let's do a 73 Corvette Stingray instead. I was like, okay. I could easily change my mind and just do something different.

If he's into a project, probably 50-50 that I'd do it. If he's into it, especially if he's got some parts laying around, he may have a Corvette transmission sitting around somewhere. I don't know. Damn.

Yeah, this would be really neat. And I think it's something that you'd... Well, you've done projects like this before. If it was me, it'd be a thing I hung my hat on forever. You're like, yeah, I built a car once. You know? Yeah, it's fun. it's kind of a renaissance man yeah it's fun when you finally get one built and when it's done and when you can like kind of like i said just hang your hat on the fact all right we're done here that's how they always end it's never like we did it it's like all right that's

it we're done yeah yeah all right we get to stop We're walking away now. Everybody cool with this? The floorboards are in, goddammit. The carpet's done. The last final touches on a car can end up lasting months. Software is like that. The first 90% of the project takes 90% of the time. The last 10 takes the other

90% because it goes late. And it's the joyless work, too. It's upholstery and carpeting and headliners and little chrome knobs and bolts and getting the radio to work right. Debugging. I know I'm on the software head, but yeah, whatever. When I turn the steering wheel,

it takes more revolutions than I want it to to make the tires turn. Now what? You know, bullshit. Yeah. So yeah, it might happen.

This little project coming up. We'll see. We'll see. Nice. All right. Well, check out all our sponsors. There's links down below,

Goat Postmates and Smart Mouth. And I hope you guys enjoy the show. PKA 448.