Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #493

Episode Date: June 5, 2020

In this week's PKA, we have genius, entrepreneur, "Most Interesting Man In The World", the legend that is John McAfee on the show and he just... plows through on his own for the 50 minutes he's on the show, talking about drugs and his theories on what God's manifestation is, all kinds of craziness that the guys react to once he departs from the show. Oh and his murder charges, because yeah, he's... lived a life. Kyle also reveals that his mole was cancerous & he shares with the guys what's going to happen with that, and there's a laundry list of other crazy topics this week, so you're not gonna want to miss it.

Painkiller already, episode 493 with our guest John McAfee Kyle? Couple of sponsors tonight, Humble Bundle Blue Chew and Smart Mouth we'll get to them later on in the show but yeah, very cool guests tonight we've been talking a little bit already

it's been interesting so far I already challenged you to a duel, you accepted unfortunately three minutes ago these guys were talking about going to South America to shoot one another that's what you jumped into Ironically, three minutes ago, these guys were talking about going to South America to shoot one another. That's what you jumped into. Very excited to have you on, John.

You're a very interesting guy. You have the kind of life that when you Google it, I'm like, this can't be real. This has to be punched up and made up. But no, it does seem to be. You've been arrested in 11 countries, probably working on the 12th. You've done a lot of crazy shit out there i do not say that i'm 74 old now please have i not done my time have i not served pricks you young kids well you're lazy motherfuckers, right? I'm in prison for you, right? So please, do not anticipate another goddamn jail term. Because you realize that won't be my last. You know this.

You understand this. Well, for 74, you look, I would not peg you for 74. You look great, especially as a very heavy drug user. I would think you'd look awful, but you look great. Well, I would, except'd look awful. But you look great. I would, except once a week, Janice and I kidnap an infant and drink its blood.

But other than that, I think I'd still be okay. Yeah. Got a little touch of gray going on the sides. You look good. I've got more gray in my beard than you do. Do not! She can give me gray on the sides? You look good. I've got more gray in my beard than you do. Do not! She can give me gray on the sides.

I've been waiting for that. That's the end. When this goes gray, you're fucked, people. No gray hair here. In fact, my hair looks lighter than it is. Well, admit it.

I've got some great hairs right here. You know, I want to have them laser removed or something. But yeah. But other than this, the lower sideburns got no goddamn great hair. That looks fantastic. Looks good. So I was reading on your Twitter, and I'm sure you're a little hyperbolic on there. You were talking about how you managed to look as good as you do while drinking two

bottles of, what is it, tequila a day and three packs of unfiltered cigarettes a day. Is that a little bit of bloviating, a little bit of exaggeration? Because that doesn't seem possible for anyone, much less someone, you know, except for Jim Aaron. Well, because you fuckers are in their 40s or early 50s, well, actually looking at all of you, nobody is in your 50s. You're all under 50.

So now, this is fucking your face. You're all under 50. So now, I just finished. Jameson, empty. Let me show you. I believe you. Not a fucking drop. Right, so now, Janice, this is my second bottle today. Let's just say we're recording

this at 2 p.m. What time is it for you, John? What time it is where you are. But anyway, so Janet's off to get I said, baby, why don't we shift rum? So she's making me a mojito out of a quarter bottle

a quarter of a quart of rum. She'll do two of those while we're on the show. You watch. Yes, I do that shit. Why not? Why not, John? Why do I quit?

Because it. You may as well, right? It fucking pleases me. You guarantee us that Bitcoin would hit 500,000 by November of this year. And if it doesn't, you said you would eat your dick. Will that video be on YouTube?

Well, first of all, let's talk about the bit people. I mean, I made this bet. Do you understand the Bitcoin maximalists? The Bitcoin maximalists, whose I think average IQ is maybe six, who are without any understanding of the blockchain other than the one understanding that Bitcoin was the first and therefore the best. I regret that if that logic actually worked, the greatest computer in the world today would have one one millionth of the power of your smartphones and would take off, take up five city blocks. No, the world doesn't work that way folks i wish you did john you might want to uh cancel that mojito john in all seriousness about the cryptic no you're just driving me across town but only for the adventure

i mean how simple is that really Really? How simple is that? Anyway. Okay, I'll cancel. About the cryptocurrency. I'm curious, John. Do you actually think that whichever cryptocurrency emerges as the winner, do you think it will be based on which one has the best technology or just which one has enthusiasm around it?

Of course. It has to be people. Because what is the best technology? The Ford Model T at 1 20th the price of any other one off automobile, including Buicks and all this other shit that ran 10 times longer at one-tenth the gas and one-tenth the service. That's technology, people. So,

that bet, that joke, because when I made that bet, I wanted to make it for $100,000. I've done it for $100,000. And someone goes, whoa, whoa, John, some idiot's going to believe that. I go, all right, a million. Please.

Bitcoin's an ancient, archaic antique. It was the first, people. It opened a door to the most fertile field of potential technology ever to arrive on this fucking planet, people. And through that door that Bitcoin opened, and Bitcoin was based on what? Blockchain. Mad Fientist Math. Oh, blockchain. Mad Fientist Mathematics.

So yeah, blockchain, math, same fucking thing, people. Based on mathematics, a most profound, one of the most powerful paradigms, branches, forks, whatever you want to call it, of math. I fucking love math. That makes Newton's discovery of the calculus. Makes Newton look like a fucking bitch. Like a retard bitch. It looks like a sandbox

play in comparison, people. No, we opened the door of all fucking doors. What's the difference between this door and all other technological doors? This one's made of numbers. Every other technological door has opened up into the bowels of a black program within some military organization, within some fucking government somewhere, or into the bowels of a private corporation.

or into the balance of a private corporation like Apple, Samsung, IBM, Microsoft. No. What difference does it make if that technology came from Microsoft? Who owns it? You? You? No!

Fucking Microsoft. I don't know. I'm telling you, Microsoft owns it if it came from the balance even though it's microsoft's shit it's still owned by microsoft well it's in the bowels so now that's why i said shit people please a small joke i'm keeping up. Yeah, yeah, I follow. I'm keeping up. Nobody's keeping up, you pricks. I promise. I don't think you know what you're saying anymore. Let me finish it.

Yeah, go ahead. Let me answer the question. So now, what's the difference? The blockchain and the world's first cryptocurrency, Bitcoin, appeared 11 years ago. Owned by whom? You. Us. I wish so, yeah.

No, you. Open fucking source, people. Do you understand what that means? You own it. Take the source. Do what you fucking want with it. It's yours. It's mine.

It's everybody's. Please, see. Or no, wait, you ran for president as a libertarian. You probably don't like that. Would you put the balls between us? Well, no, we communally own it, right? If it were communism, it would be far worse. No, it's neither communism or socialism or anything with a

fucking name, because this paradigm has never existed before, people. There is no name to what has been given to you. Now, as you get this, it means one of a million things, like

oh, I'm a programmer. I can create what I want with it. I'll add this, subtract that. Or, or it's like, what the fuck is this? I don't give a shit. For those of you who are doing that, may I say,

it's like someone coming to your door and knocking on it and leaving the goose that lays the golden egg on your fucking doorstep and walks up and you come out and say i ain't hungry for goose today do you understand you have been given whatever you want it to be. I mean, if God himself or herself could come to the answer. Now you've lost me. I was all on board for the last ten minutes of that.

Every step of the way I was with you and understanding every coherent word that you put out there. But when you suggested that the Almighty might be female, please, sir. He doesn't have a dick or a pussy. He's just kind of out there. No, he's got a dick. I've seen paintings. He's got a dick. He's got a dick when he's human. And it's circumcised.

You guys have never taken heroin, have you? Because if you have taken fucking heroin, within a minute, God comes down from heaven and plants a fucking kiss. Wait, and he had a vagina?

No, it was... Oh, please, fuck me. You guys have never taken heroin? I haven't. People told me a bit of a square because of it. Are you shitting me? No, okay, so

God. I wanted to ask about your drug use with this. Apparently in 2010, you were like a... No, not. No, no, no, no. Somehow, I want to know about God.

We just skipped over one of the most fundamental precepts of our perceptions of reality. By all means, dig in. What's going on in the bowels of this? God is trisexual. We all know that. I mean, those of us who have taken heroin certainly know that. What's the third sex? What?

Did you say trisexual? did he did sexual of course okay male female and she male i mean good god people what have you never watched fucking born hot i will try to okay now you're tired now you're delving into my area of expertise. Go on. Our time is limited. I don't know if any of you have ever noticed my wife is black. Any of you who have ever married or even lived with a black woman, they are the best fucking mothers

on the goddamn planet. However, every living, moving thing is one of two things. Mother, father, or children. Or female. No, not, no, no. I'm a child to my wife, and therefore, when she comes in and goes, this, it means you've got 10 seconds to ask your last question.

But anyway, we're not there yet. Good, good. Good, good, good. Very thankful to hear that. So something I was reading about, you know, lots of content about you out there. Is it true that up until about 2010, you were a sober guy, yoga, fitness kind of guy, and then you started experimenting with some – i was seeing some articles talking about bath salts and some drug called alpha php that you were messing around with keeping you working functioning on a high level is there any truth to that or is that just the

the media pumping your tires a lot of truth to that but about that that's issue okay That's the issue. Okay. Dates? Fuck me, I don't know what the date is. 210-2825-215. We don't have the year now? I don't know. The end of May. Listen, dude, wherever you got that information, if it did come from God, I want his fucking phone number. I've got complaints.

His fucking complaints for God. But anyway, so now. Yeah, so sometime between 2004 and 2012. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I had been sober and clean for quite a while. Too fucking

long, to be honest with you people. Too fucking long. Because honest with you people too fucking long because before I cleaned up showered off and stopped ingesting anything other than raw fucking vegetables yeah

I had taken more drugs and you three motherfuckers could carry I'll tell you that I don't doubt it. I know it. It's a fucking fact. Especially if you can't weed. It would take

ten of you just to carry the weed. Wait, wait, I don't know if you know who you're talking to. We have an Olympic level smoker on our team as well. Ah! Yeah, but he can do ten times as much heroin as you, bitch. Yes, he can.

That you cannot, my friend. What's the most fun drug that you've done? What's the one that you're just, you can't stop coming back? What does that mean, most fun drug? I mean, is it the most fun in terms of enhancing sexuality? No, no. Let me finish. Let me finish.

Is it the most fun? Is it the most fun in terms of getting deep into that hellish introspection space where you finally see yourself. Is it the most fun in terms of being able to stay up for three god damned weeks? I don't know. You gotta fucking tell me, dude. I've got a question.

What's the most fun drug? I go, okay, I'm with amateurs. John, you are with amateurs. I'm with you. Let me ask this. Joe Rogan describes DMT as this almost permanent upgrade to your character if you're in a video game. You just get a little smarter.

You get a little introspective and more creative. Is this like permanent improvement to you? Have you tried DMT? What drug would you suggest for that effect? Fuck, I've had enough DMT to put you guys in the hospital. I believe you. No. He's wrong. I think Joe is demonstrating a naivete about drugs that comes when you discover

drugs past the age of 25. Because really, if you don't discover them before 25, then it's too late. You're a follower. If before 25, you're a leader. Do you understand what I'm saying? So he's a follower. The younger, the better, I say.

Oh, absolutely. Are you still following my drugs? Age, absolutely. Are you still selling my drugs? Age for MDPE, I would say 19. The best age for MDPV is at least 22, maybe 23. I'm just saying. Can you explain what MDPE does, what that is? MDPV, V, methylene, dioxy, pyy pyro that's mdpv well now i'm sure that you've read in newspapers saw on the tv six years ago where you know a nice uh polite gentleman in miami just randomly grabbed a stranger and ate his face. Yes, I heard that. Zombie.

Yes. Now, that's methylene, dioxy, pyruvalerol. That's what he was on. Now, what was his problem? Hungry. Here is the problem with MDPV. If you don't have a $5,000 scale,

don't go anywhere near it because you've got to measure it $5,000 scale. Don't go anywhere near it. Because you've got to measure it to the 5 microgram level in order to stay safe. Because here's what happens. Ooh! It's, um...

One milligram per 11.3 kilograms of body weight measured naked, not wet on a fucking scale that you know is precise. Okay? Now let's just say the end result is

5 milligrams. You take 4.9 milligrams, what's going to happen? Nothing. You're going to feel jack fucking shit like you've been ripped off you take 5.1

milligrams what's gonna happen you're gonna eat somebody's fucking face now that's MDPV so I have taken kilograms of MDPV

it's number one the most powerful drug ever invented. If you get the dosage right, I've come close on either end. A bunch of times I've had more trips that did nothing and a few trips that almost made me think, you know what? Weasel people would eat other people's faces off. I mean, that's almost as close as I got. So does that make you feel really energized and you're staying up fucking for days? Or is it making you feel enlightened, introspective? How's this drug making you feel when you're doing it at just the right dose? All. All of the above all of it okay one

mdpv is the only drug i've ever experienced that provides tactile hallucinations i mean i become a master getting my dosage right and i was in Colorado one time and I went to the bank after snorting my exact fucking dosage to the goddamn microgram why I had a $5,000 scale I ain't fucking this drug up so now I'm standing in line

and I just know there's some bitch sucking my dick I feel it around around my it's okay near my butt pulling me into her and she's sucking like mad i'm not gonna come in a second i'm looking down my dick is like nine feet long but ain't nobody there nobody is there and um I need a better scale I'm sorry? I need a better scale I'm gonna get started

it was the perfect doses I'm telling you no not just that auditory hallucinations you can't fucking believe first thing is everybody if you get the dosage right on the first trip who is it that talks to you? You.

Whose voice is it? Yours. Whose inflection? Yours. Whose knowledge? The voice is telling you shit that you've forgotten. You're about to enter a nightclub and your own voice is telling you shit that you forgot during some drug binge in Cincinnati. What was the most enlightening thing that yourself told you while you were on this drug that you maybe had forgotten about from a different drug binge? Anything that really opened your mind's eye a little bit? Changed the way you think maybe permanently?

Yeah. I don't know if you're going to understand it. I don't know if anybody could understand it. In St. Louis, Missouri, in the most intense trip I have ever experienced, I sat down with God, who was crying and said, my loneliness is intolerable. I'm sorry. It was God. It was me. It was the word.

It was the truth. It horrified me, terrified me, shook me to the fucking core. Because I saw the truth. Of of course if there is a god what more lonely entity could possibly fucking be perceived or conceived people it's true makes sense nothing but drugs can bring you to that that place that chair where you sit and hear that most horrifying of all truths that if there is a god that god is the loneliest

entity ever possibly conceivable. So that was it. You asked me? Interesting. You know, I thought we were going to be talking about antivirus, but this is much more entertaining. No, you've got to ask. You've got to ask.

And something else I want to know is you've got, you're very open on your Twitter account, you know, with your drug habits and with some sexual things as well. Do you think that it was some of these drugs you took that kind of maybe opened your eyes to how pleasurable a glass bottom boat is? Or being, I know you trend toward a couple of scatological things. Is that something that you were interested in prior to the drugs? Or is that just a joke you tell sometimes? I don't know. I really don't.

I'm not sure what specific details you're discussing. Do you like getting shit on? No, I'm not. Number one, I don't like the smell. I've tried it. It's difficult. I was just checking. I thought you were a weirdo for a moment.

Believe me, I'm far more weird than that. I hear anything about my life. I'm telling you the truth. Let me tell you a goddamn story that's true. Hit us with it. From 1985. I was with a friend and a gentleman who worked for me at a company called Omex,

the first optical memory system in Santa Clara, California, the heart of Silicon Valley at the birth of the computer age. And he's a kinky motherfucker, right?

I'm bored. He says, why don't you come with me to an event put on by Gemini. Gemini? What's Gemini? Well, he says, it's a society, nothing important, men dominant, women submissive. Oh, fuck yes, it's a society, nothing important. Men dominant, women submissive.

Oh, fuck yes, let's go. We went. Fascinating. Two weeks later, he said, come with me to an event at the Catacombs in San Francisco. Please, God, look at the soap. The most wild sex club ever in the history of humanity, including the goddamn Romans, by the way.

And they were bored motherfuckers and rich. So, no, better than that. Stranger than that. Anyway, in the catacombs, Janus. You go, what's Janus? He says, well, better than that. Stranger than that. Anyway, into catacombs. Janus. You go, what's Janus? He says, well, it's reversed. It's women dominant, men submissive.

And I go, fuck it, let's go. I enjoyed the Gemini shows. I can't begin to describe. Anyway, so now, fuck me in one goddamn drop. Janus is not back with the booze. So it doesn't happen soon. It's over, folks. Because I'm still a brat.

We have the other Jameson. I got more Janice than God. This waterfall is empty. Anyway, so now we go. I've never been to the fucking Catacombs. God damn it. At the top floor of one of the oldest buildings in San francisco stone arches 20 feet tall i mean it looks like a goddamn catacomb that's why it's called that i suspect

anyway so entering i i see some interesting things one there's a gay couple of male gays okay some interesting things. One, there's a gay couple, male gays, okay? The guy is spread-eagled on the cross, tied. Electrodes are attached to his nipples and his testicles. And his partner is in the hallway where everybody's walking, going, would you like to try? And so you could crank it from zero up to 10.

At 10, he passed out. But no one ever did that. And so you cranked it, and he'd go, ah! Ah! Thank you! Thank you! Right, OK. That's what happened when I twisted the thing.

But in any case, so shit like this. Let me tell you what the main show was. You may also Google this to verify the truth of what I'm telling you, people. There was a dominatrix across the bay in Oakland named Mistress Kat, K-A-T, not C-A-T. Look it up. One of the greatest dominatrixes of all time. And so she came out on stage. This is, fuck me, I don't know, early, one o'clock in the morning.

So we're all in the auditorium. I got a front row seat. I'm with Stefan, my employee and good friend and truly sick motherfucker. I'm in the front row. So on the stage comes out Mr. Cat and a naked slave, a male, right? He's got his dick and his testicles tied up in a nice beautiful red bow,

kind of like a Christmas present, right? Makes sense. So now they bring out a hook on a chain and lower it. We notice now that his hands are bound. He puts his hands

over his head like this bound. The hook and put it between. They haul him up two feet off the floor. Not much. He's happy no pain no nothing mr cat comes out and puts on a leather fucking glove black black yes and on his finger all of the fingers and the thumb and the palm you, it looks like there are tacks inside it sticking out half an inch, right?

Clearly, some, clearly, close to tacks, some that you don't want to fucking touch, that's for sure. And so, just one hand, the other's place is just plain, ungloved. She walks over to her slave and reaches between his legs, takes his balls, cups them gently in her hand, at which point he moans. She strokes him lovingly with her hand across the face, down his chest, his side, his back, and squeezes until blood. Onto the floor. Now, what does a slave do? Now, he, he, believe it or not, orgasms.

I mean, there's a jism shooting across the fucking state. And this mofo, what does he do? He takes his hands, lifts himself like this, so that she doesn't have to reach so low, and she can still squirt

blood from his balls. So now, that was the pièce de résistance of that evening. So now that was the PSA de resistance of that evening. So now I can't remember what the question was, but if you'd like to ask, you will now

have a better understanding of my own fucking experience. Yeah. I lost the plot too. It started with Twitter scat talk. I missed scat. I'll never remember that. Wow, beautiful. Listen, at that time in 1985, fucking gorgeous.

I mean, you might go, he could squeeze my balls for text too, provided we have at least ten minutes together afterwards. So I don't know. You guys are quiet. I mean, have I stepped up? No, no, no, no, no, no. No. You're right on par

with where we usually go. It's just a little more interesting than... You usually go this fucking far. Please, don't fuck with me. You do not go this far. No, we do. Yeah, absolutely. I've seen some pretty similar shows.

I was at a club called The Box in New York and there was a pretty ridiculous dominatrix show. There wasn't as much blood. Ridiculous, titillating, terrifying, but ridiculous. I'm sorry, that didn't come to anybody's mind in that element. So it's one of a bunch of things like, oh my fucking God, I'm scared. That's one. And number two is, oh, I've never tried that. Let's give that a try. Where

do I get one of those gloves? Number three is men unzipping their pants and masturbating in the goddamn chairs and so on. But no, no, ridiculous didn't come to anybody's mind, I'm sure of you. I can just say. Fair enough. Jesus Christ. So I want to hear about some of your time in Belize. It seemed like you got into a bit of trouble down there with the government of Belize and you had to end up leaving the country under ridiculous circumstances. And I understand they ended up auctioning off a lot of your property. And then I read that your home there even was burned down under what they call suspicious circumstances.

What's the truth that people don't know behind that? It's too fucking long. I mean, they he said you know i didn't get any much trouble i mean they tried to kill me they had the army they police after me they were shooting at me in the jungle i mean i was in hiding for two months escaped into guatemala i got arrested three days later in guatem Police demanded that I be returned so they could torture and kill me. It's a beautiful thing, Third World Company countries, folks. The Attorney General for Guatemala, a gentleman named Celeste Ferroguero, the Attorney General. I hired him for $100,000

and said, I just want to go back to America. Can you make that happen? And he goes, yeah. And that was it. So now I went back to America. Why did the authorities in Belize think you killed somebody? Okay, so now you need to go back a year when okay first of all i was in san pedro the american enclave on the tourist island of san pedro one of the most beautiful fucking places

on this planet by the way if you want to the fact that people were there in any case um i got bored after three years i said i'm going into the jungle, the interior of Belize. I went into Orange Walk District, the largest district of Belize, 18,000 people, all of them black, bought a huge piece of property, built a serious fucking compound for millions of dollars, staffed it with very dangerous people, all of them heavily armed, and basically called attention to myself, which is one of the stupidest things I've ever done. You get stupid as you get older. In any case, I'd been there for a year and a half, and the local political authority and the largest district in Belize came to

me and said, Mr. McPhee, our election's coming up in five months. If you would donate $2 million to our party, here's what we would do. We would give you a million acres along the river. That could eventually be worth billions, but I probably wouldn't live that long. Tax breaks, all the pussy you could ever goddamn imagine. I idiotically said no. What idiot says no when the person coming is representing the goddamn government

and they have 17,000 soldiers with AR-15s, tanks, and fucking helicopters. Now, who does that? Well, I do. I'm stupid. I said, no. I should have said, two million? Let me give you four. Or ten.

No, I said, no. Well, one week said, no. Well, one week later, 47, armed soldiers from the gang suppression unit, which reported directly to the prime minister,

its equivalent of the Navy SEALs in America, stormed my property, arrested me, shot my dog in front of my eyes, saying, Mr. McAfee, if you do not think we're serious, boom!

The dog's head exploded in front of me. My goodness. It sucks. That's sad. I just said, I see you're serious. What is your name, my friend? Anyway, so now. It's been a terrible day.

I was tortured. They destroyed my lab. I was doing antibiotic research. Cost me half a million dollars in damages and then just left. My goodness. What kind of torture were they putting you through? I'd rather not. Anyway, so the next day,

the next day, the same gentleman who asked for the two million came back and said, Oh, Mr. McAfee, good. We are so sorry. We made a mistake. We had bad information. Please forgive us. And Mr. McAfee, by the way, have you

reconsidered your donation? Well, I was pissed by then because they shot my dog. I don't give a shit about the destruction of property. They killed my dog. I had 17. Yes, yes, destruction of property. They killed my dog. I had 17. Yes, yes, yes, but they killed my favorite dog. You're wrong.

Anyway, so, Mr. McAfee, we're terribly sorry. We made a mistake. However, Mr. McAfee, Have you reconsidered your deletion? I've said simply very politely, by the way. Up here, I will shoot you in the head right now.

That was another mistake. I should have said, I have indeed. Now that you've shown me the truth, the light of the proper way. You're a bit of a slow learner here. You know what? It's my fucking emotions. No, no.

And I meant it. I had a.357 Magnum in the shoulder, which I pulled. I didn't point it at him. I had it in my hand pointing to the ground. I said, get off my property and never return us. I will kill you. Do you understand me? Because I knew what they had done. They killed my fucking dog. I mean, forget the torture. Forget the half million dollars. Forget everything. No, they killed my goddamn dog.

They don't pass muster here. Get off my property or else I will kill you. Well, damn dog. No, I'm sorry. They don't pass muster here. Get off my property or else I will kill you. Well, that started a war with the Belizean government, which lasted for seven months. Until the time they couldn't collect me legally. Why the fuck may I have the most serious security? Listen, if the Belizean army had tried to collect me illegally, a hundred of them would have died. And of course, we would all die too. No, we're not going to do that shit.

Because I moved back to San Pedro, the American fucking enclave. 94% of all Malaysian income comes from Americans and the tourists. They don't fuck with you, San Pedro. However they were so goddamn clever, one night the government poisoned nine of my 16 remaining dogs. And the next night, killed my next-door neighbor after planting rumors that he had killed my dogs. I knew better.

He was a, hang on a second, Janice? Janice? Janice! Hey, Taylor, maybe take a second to fix your camera again. Okay. I don't know why it's doing this.

Sorry. No, what can you do? We don't... What the fuck, baby? For any viewers, John wanted to use Skype, so this is new to us. Well, old us, but whatever. I'm talking to you. Oh, I thought you were finished.

No, no, I haven't. Probably the word left by now. It's been very boring so far. Hello, everyone. Sorry about the interruption. I don't think we heard that. Probably not. Okay. Sorry about the interruption, everyone.

No problem. It's all good, Janice. I don't know who this woman is. I just... We'll figure it out later. So anyway. So yeah, so the... I knew it was not my neighbor

who poisoned my dogs. God damn it, he had dogs. You tell me, people, what dog owner is going to kill somebody else's dogs? woke up at two in the morning and they were lying in the sand on the beach vomiting their intestines out of their mouth or shitting their intestines

off grass. I had to kill them all. Wow. You think that was not a difficult task. And you've never had a dog before. Can you imagine nine that you loved, you raised from puppies five years earlier?

You fed them. You cared for them. When they bit into a porcupine. You helped pull out the fucking spines. You cradled them when they were sick. You loved them.

And they were out there in the sand, vomiting their intestines. I don't know, so I shot them all I knew. It was not my fucking neighbor. He loved dogs people they forgot this

no no the next night the next night that neighbor was murdered shot in the back of the head gangster style if I wanted to do harm to anyone shot in the back of the head gangster style if i wanted to do harm to anyone i would hope that i had the common sense to wait six months

or a year before taking it what idiot what idiot and you can't say well the um what do they call that the anger of the moment no it was 24 hours later plenty of time I think it was the Belizean government 18 hours later they came I knew they were coming

I knew they were coming i hid in an attic and my my estate on sandpaper which are designed specifically for such emergencies this is my life for 55 years so of course i have an escape plan. So I hid in the attic for 22 hours laying motionless. I pissed my pants because I was afraid to move, to make a noise. Police were searching right below me for me. Special room. Impossible to detect. After 20-some hours, I came down. The police were gone.

Scurried across the sand, hid under another one of my buildings in the sand, which had under a huge piece of plywood, had a small, shallow grave dug in the sand, which I put myself in. The police actually came two hours later looking again with flashlights and so on they left about 4 a.m that which case i left walked 100 yards of the beach to a neighbor who was a seasonal resident of San Pedro and had given

me the keys to their house so that my caretaker could maintain me and hid in their back garage with a lock that I had the key to and called some men on Nagus

one of the seven women i was living with at that time and i called her because i knew that she had set this whole thing up which she had which she admitted to later and i said are you going to help me now sam she was crying And I said, are you going to help me now, Sam? She was crying. I said, yes. So I said, then you call this taxi driver, which I had arranged a year before and paid the man a fortune just in case he gets a call with this code word. She flew over from Orange Walk to San Pedro and Went from the airport to the taxi.

The taxi came up. This is the craziest thing ever. Came up that dirt back road, 14 miles from San Pedro town to where I lived. I jumped in the taxi. I hid on the back floor. Sam had a flowing, Samantha had a flowing dress, covered me with it. Three minutes later, as we're heading south on that road, the police, two vans, maybe 25 officers, were heading up to my place to continue their search.

They stopped us. they stopped us but Samantha always does a very sexy alluring lusty lady did she convince them not to

pursue with a little sexual favor no it didn't have to do anything she merely as she saw them coming she opened her blouse so that her nipples were not quite picking up where everything else was. And so no one,

and this van stopped us. The police are here. I'm looking up to the left of Sam's left leg, and I can see the goddamn police officer looking. Not looking down. He's looking at Sam. They have a brief conversation. We move on.

It's a long story. You don't want to hear this shit all over time. Maybe another day. All right? Jeez. So, you're running for president against Trump and Biden. How would you describe... I'm not. I'm not. I was. I was running under the Libert and Biden. How would you describe... I'm not. I was. I was running under the Libertarian banner.

They chose a woman. That's fine. To be the nominee. In 2016, I came in third. I didn't even place this time. I'm a transity, people. So anyway, I've got to run. Janice just gave me this sign, which means you guys mean nothing now. Janice.

Compared to Janice, we are nothing. Yes. Well, you two, give Janice our best. Will do. Thank you for coming on. All right. Thank God. Thank God.

All right. We're going to switch over to Discord now because Skype is fucking atrocious. And only idiots use Skype. Idiots and crazy people crazy and we're back pka 493 so that was a thing that was a thing um so we are stressed out yeah so stressed dude i lost my appetite even before the show. Before the show started, I was like, I'm hitting, like, Taylor, please do your research on this guy. Last night on my live stream, I'm like, I was worried I'd be able to interview him well. I knew he'd be tough.

I knew he'd be hard. I think we did all right. Getting him to tell his side of the Belize murder story was as great as you could do. You're welcome. Because there is no interviewing him. There's no interviewing. He is like a bowler made of

horse shit that you have to get rolling down a hill. Once it's rolling, you don't try to get between the horse shit and gravity. You just let it flow. You just let it flow. That guy has damaged his brain so severely. If you look, so we all do our research when we have these guests. I think it was clear last week when each of us had lots of background on our guests.

And we knew the right questions to ask to get the best responses. I felt like we all did a very good job last week. This week, I were we were equally prepared i i i the only thing that i i wanted to ask that i didn't was the fact that his he met his wife and she was a prostitute who propositioned him i wrote that down too yeah i didn't want she seems so sweet i want to be like so she's a whore huh i didn't want to do that if i had hours with him i did i wanted to he said that he hasn't paid taxes since 2010 and he's the fbi's number one target and i'm like well i'm not gonna interrupt

the murder story to talk about taxes this is a good opportunity to shut the fuck up let's take it and we were maybe 40 seconds into the pre-show when i joined when i'm like oh this list of topics and questions for him is absolutely useless there is no way that he's gonna like kyle's saying you know we did our research on this guy we did but i don't think any of our questions had any bearing whatsoever i had three topics written down favorite drugs which you hit anyway uh the murder in south america which kyle hit and uh i guess he knew jeffrey epstein but that wasn't on his wikipedia page it was for my twitch chat so it wasn't a top priority for me because you know the twitch chat tells me the

76ers are injured every night it doesn't mean it doesn't mean a lot. Yeah. Yeah. Rogan dies all the time. Yeah. I had a lot of topics and questions, but like he was like, like in the pre show, you know why Taylor was like literally two minutes late, not late to the show, but like late to like when the call was two minutes old. Yeah. Yeah.

The call was two minutes old. He wasn't late, but McAfee was actually early. That's what happened. And in that period of time, McAfee had challenged me to a duel. And he was like, I was like, well, I think I actually challenged him to the duel. He brought up a duel and I was like, well, yeah. For some reason, he thought I was the smartest one on the call.

I'm pretty sure it's because I need glasses. one on their call i'm pretty sure it's because i need glasses you know he was going he was like well i'm gonna have a leather slip band holster and a clock 17 and i and you have to use a button down snap cap holster with a 1911 and i'm just like well what that's not how duels work we use the same weapon like you get to pick the weapon type i'll tell you what each of our setups he challenged us collectively to both a weed smoking competition and a duel i don't think john did his research he doesn't know who he's fucking with kyle i could beat john in the weed smoking contest and then kill him in the duel right yeah the duel is really where he missed the mark like you probably should know you're tremendous with a gun and and he seems uh actually you know he's the kind of guy who might be pretty

fucking good with a gun and you don't know oh Oh, I know he's very good with a gun. If you look at his history, every time he's arrested, it's like DUI and possession of a firearm while intoxicated. There's always a gun involved with each of his charges. It's like international water with high caliber weapons. Wait, what? Yeah. water with high caliber weapons wait what yeah he was he was clearly he's clearly brain damaged honestly like from he said he was in south america making all natural antibiotics i think we know what his laboratory was really cranking out in belize right like like that i

something else yeah I read his Wikipedia and I'm not sure everyone will take from it the same thing that I did at the pre-McAfee stuff. This guy wasn't just a computer programmer. He was like God's gift to computer programming. His resume, like a top guy at Xerox when

Xerox was the king of computing at the time. Then he moved to NASA and Lockheed Martin. Then he got a copy of a virus and decided to invent antivirus. McAfee antivirus was not a bullshit thing you wish didn't come with your computer back in the whatever, 70s or 80s. It was the only antivirus around. Yeah, yeah.

It's very impressive. Yeah, his list of accomplishments are he invented one of the very first im programs like like like oh pow pow or pow pow or something like that that's what i thought this interview was going to be like so like wow pow wow how did you come up with the idea for instant messaging over over the computer i mean today it's i mean we're on we're on one of the leading programs that that do that today sky what did you think that's that's maybe not what the interview is going to be 45 seconds after he joined the fucking phone call and i realized he wasn't just doing a bit like like i i thought at first that he was being goofy and silly with us like like but he kept he said like

three times he's like you should have been this. And then he went on one of the – like you guys got to hear like 45 minutes of him ranting. He ranted from the moment he joined the call. And we told him we weren't recording. So before the show starts, right, I took out every camera. I try to make our heads roughly the same size. I try to get everything right. John McAfee doing all this shit, right? He's moving around. He's got the McAfee dance cooking.

I'm like, well, fuck that. We're going to get what you get on this. We're going wide on McAfee. Go wide on McAfee. His head was cut off a lot. His head was cut off on the feed. There's nothing I can do about that. There's nothing you can do. You're right i

i didn't know because we were on skype and skype's changed that i had to click into the call i was still waiting for it and i get a text from kyle a few minutes before we're slated to start and it just says hurry up get in here he's on a weird manic rant it's like i hop in there and yeah he's i i didn't know if he was 100 sure we weren't recording yet he did later we we made he we made sure he knew and we explained it and then he insulted us a few times yes yeah so before the show there's usually we talk for a few minutes maybe set them up for success and uh we don't record that we've never recorded that if someone's like it's pretty rare someone says something that they wouldn't want to get out but we've it never happens and uh he's like you know you're missing out because this is

gold you know and i was like yeah but but we don't do that you know're not ready. And he's like, what are we waiting on? I'm like, the third guy. Fuck him. Let's go. That's about how it went. No, no. He's pretty good. We want him here. He's on the way. Three thirds of the show, generally. Jesus Christ.

You know what? I like him. That was an interesting guy but i didn't like it no it was halfway into his stories i liked him as a guest i have no idea what's happening yeah i mean i like him as a guest of course yeah yeah i don't like him as a human being i couldn't stand to be in a room with him because i'll tell you what he well he reminds me of if you've ever been around someone who's really drunk and you're really sober and you just wish they'd shut the fuck up, you're like tired of their silly Billy nonsense. Like, like he was like that. And maybe that was because he was actually drunk because he actually has finished off a bottle of Jameson today.

Or maybe that's all a big act. All I saw was a big empty bottle of Jameson. We've sat here and put away like we've sat here and put bottles away and we weren't that goofy i made fun of a crippled man but i didn't i didn't rock back and forth and talk about god being a trisexual riley oh he's a little full i like riley too i apologize that's the only thing i've ever apologized for saying on the show and I've said some horrific things. The only thing I've ever apologized for and will ever apologize for.

Fuckers. I was making fun of that man after he injured his spine because I was just so drunk. I'm glad he's okay. I'm glad he can walk. Cool. I was liking how many different times he'd be like, and you know, God comes down, he's sitting there, and it comes

down to three, it comes down to two things. A, God is a woman. B, God is a man. Three, God could be a... And it's like, wait, what? You just said there's two possible options, and now we're into A, B, C, D, and that reminds me of Belize, and they shot my dog.

And I had... it was so you need a five thousand dollar scale to understand the shit i'm talking then you'll know dude that drug sounds like a punishment the way he described it yeah tactile and auditory hallucinations at the bank you're not selling i was i don't know i was buying i was buying what he was selling i'm like wait a minute so tactile you can feel your dick getting sucked and his dick's nine feet long and it's getting sucked and he's ready to go and he described that as if he was calmly stoically standing there at the counter at bank of america i guarantee he was a fucking loon the poor clerk the teller is trying to figure out if he wants to deposit he was a fucking loon as the poor clerk the teller is trying to figure out if he wants to deposit

he was just a stream of insane consciousness so I couldn't even slip jokes in when he was telling that joke about getting his dick sucked I want to be like and that's why he's not allowed at Bank of America anymore but no you can't because he's just going to keep flowing right into the next nonsense I had some material around

God as a she- and i i was like oh it's sometimes you seize the opportunity to be quiet it was that old skype thing where it's like you know he tramples over you three different times in a row and then you decide like i'm getting this question and you get like 22 words into it and he's still talking and you're like this isn't gonna happen it's not he isn't gonna happen listening let alone answering what question i'm trying to pose to him oh and you know what's really interesting he had nothing to promote why was he here so so uh oh kyle said he was a manic and a crazy person ranting i also think he's a crazy genius and if i had more time we could have gotten some nuggets of genius to fall through

you know to come out this guy was an actual genius right he was an actual genius person someone as smart as i could ever dream of being and and and then since then you know he's discovered drugs and you know hit his mid-70s and stuff like that but i still feel like there's nuggets of interesting stuff in there ideas that are unique and he came up with on his own he genuinely does look tremendous for a 74 year old man who is he really does yeah he looks good he looks 50 something and he's at 74 man and i really do have more gray in my beard than he does like he did two things here and that's it i like that he doesn't seem to really or what what he called us bitches for not experimenting with heroin yes that is the level of alpha i don't think any of us were prepared for.

You guys haven't tried heroin? It's like, shit, I've never felt bad about it before. Where was he? Oh, he's in the country. His Wikipedia says he's in America. His Wikipedia says he's in America and then he went... In Lexington, Tennessee, I think. But I think he's hiding on a yacht or something and he didn't want to say

where he was. If it isn't America, we should let people know. We started recording at 2 PM central time. Yeah. Yeah. Just so you know, like,

like this is the earliest we've ever, we, we, uh, we moved the show, uh, the both, both weeks in a row.

Last week, it was like an hour or two early because our guest obviously was in the UK, but I have no idea where this man is. But it required a 3 p.m. Eastern start time. And Skype. I like to imagine that he's on the East Coast. He just wanted to do it then. Yeah.

That was the whole thing. He probably is. He's like, no, I don't want to do it then. Something to promote? No, I'm worth $50 million or whatever. Oh, he's not. He used to be worth $100 million. But now it's more like three

four yeah his wikipedia page said it went he lost 96 million of his 100 million value net worth uh but wikipedia yeah yeah during that economic downturn and uh but i don't know how it's gone since then or whatever it is i It would surprise me to learn. He had nothing to promote. Yeah, I was going to say, it would surprise me to learn that that guy's pulling off successful. He comes on here and he's got a whole bunch of businesses booming to promote. John McAfee comes on and he just rants about titties and drugs. And then he's like, well, time to go.

Oh, OK. time to go oh okay i've thought for sure that you'd written some sort of new program or there was a nootropics business or uh or maybe he's not running any businesses right now that's what i was trying to get out he's he's not getting anything going we can't this i thought he was kind of joking a little bit very early in the show where he's like i'm two bottles of jameson in but fucking janice better bring me my quarter fifth of gin and tonic or whatever it was my mojito and it was like maybe 15 minutes later he's like where the fuck is janice with the monkey he was actually upset not getting his yeah i know he told her to go get one i think just before you got on the pre-show call oh okay yes i knew that was real i was like what's wrong you're getting the shakes flavor yeah wow so that's the thing so that's the thing yeah you know like i hope i hope people enjoyed that i was very uncomfortable throughout the whole thing

and just sort of i just i felt like i was on some sort of a roller coaster ride that like like i can't get off. I thought I was going to like this ride, but now it's just really bumpy and I'm getting a little nauseous. Answer me that. Have you ever felt more like, what do I do on this show? No. Than that. Cause I've, I usually feel like I'm pretty, I put a lot of time in researching guests coming up with questions and I tried to do that as much as I could, but like he, he is a riddle wrapped in an enigma, that guy.

There is no way to know what's going to send him on a 15-minute rant about very little. Taylor, I was so stressed headed into this. For two days now, I've been worried about how to do a good job interviewing John McAfee. I had George Foreman chicken, rice, and mixed vegetables. And I gave it back to Jackie. I'm like, what is this? No, no, I don't want this. I eat this twice a day for years. I lost my appetite over this interview.

I wasn't happy about anything, but I just felt like I wanted to be prepared for it. I wanted to know more about the guy. And I really thought that we were going to be interviewing some sort of business magnate who's got a kooky side. That's what I was thinking, too. I was thinking that it'd be like, oh, man, he's going to talk about silly fetish stuff. And then he's going to drop some knowledge about how blockchain works. And he's this hyper genius. But, yeah, it was a lot more the.

The hyper genius part was hard to get into that yeah that diamond is encrusted in dirt yeah so i i hope people enjoyed that um you know we've been trying to get him forever he's canceled like last minute three times or something like that i'm sure because he ran out of mojitos or something or or the or the belizean government was hot on his tail or or his dog was getting assassinated god knows what did you know the assassination thing made a little bit of sense to me like i don't know hey but you are perhaps i'm gullible i'm just like oh this is all fitting together quite honestly i was thinking why does the the government of belize need to frame you if they

want to get you can't they just get you yeah that was i mean that was a good question to ask not that it would have mattered no his answer would have been like you don't understand the ins and outs of the belizean government do you and i'd be like no, do you? And I'd be like, no fucking... Do you? Clearly not! Mr. Bain, positive Belize had a government. I didn't know... I don't know what the government... The only thing he wouldn't answer is when Taylor asked him about how they tortured

him in Belize, and he just went, I don't want to talk about that. I just pictured him like in Rambo First Blood 2 chained to that fucking mattress box springs going ahhh being electrocuted by a fucking officer

I had a joke about Miss Cat the dominatrix working for the Belizean government that I couldn't get in it's rough a lot of jokes didn't get through no there's not a lot of shared airtime. Well, time's passed now.

So, yeah, that was very interesting. I was not worried leading up to it at all. I was thinking exactly what Kyle was. It was like, oh, it's going to be another interview on PKA. He's a goofy guy who's also very smart. I thought way more of it was a bit and apparently maybe that what he was doing is partially a bit maybe but and we're falling for it i don't know maybe yeah he may have gotten on that call and went can you believe that i bet

they think i'm crazy all right it's like there was an old snl skit about reagan where and this is when reagan was president and you know everybody everybody thought Reagan was a real dum-dum. And the skit starts off and the guy playing Reagan is like, well, hello, little girl. Yes, I'll sign this for you. And I hope you enjoyed coming to the Oval Office. Now, you have a nice day now. And some advisor comes in and asks him a question. And he's like, oh, I just don't know.

Have Ted take care of this one. I just don't know anymore about those sort of things. And he walks out of the room and he goes, all right, everyone, back to work. And then like the wall swings open and 30 advisors come in at once with like flow charts. And he's giving notes and commands to like eight different departments of government and like handling war fronts in the Middle East and oil prices. And they're like, sir, please slow down. I've got one speed.

And he's just like... I imagine he's like that. He got off the phone call and he was just like, I bet they think I'm a real goofball. Janice, get a load of these tards. They bought it. Yeah, that was weird. That was fucking weird.

Anyway. What do you want to go to next? A lot of stuff is going on. I'm fixated on that. That hurt me a little on the inside. I'm not going to sleep well tonight. Those were all withdrawals. Oh, gosh, damn.

Emotional bank account running empty fuck anyway there's riots in minnesota pretty crazy i don't know if you saw like that so here let me let me kick off with that i watched the video of the cop kneeling on the guy's neck with that i watched the video of the cop kneeling on the guy's neck and uh i went into it with a pro cop bias right that i guess that's how i was leaning i didn't know i was but as i'm watching it i'm like well it was probably an accident and when i studied brazilian jiu-jitsu i or trained whatever i heard everyone daydreams about using it a little bit it's kind of an asshole daydream but it is what it is. And I'd read stories of not to do it.

Like one guy put a guillotine on someone. It was an argument at a drive-through, right? Somehow two cars got angry at each other. Yeah, for sure. And the people got out of their cars. They got into some sort of fight. One guillotines the other. But because he was so drunk, the victim that is, he died.

He died to a move that wouldn't normally kill you so i had that in my head you know this cop didn't mean to kill anyone maybe the victim had a pre-existing medical condition of some sort i read that he died in the hospital later on which reinforced that now i think that's bullshit and um then i watched the video oh you haven't watched the video okay so the video starts with the cop putting his neck on is this the carotid artery artery yeah yeah yeah uh so the guy's like on his back in handcuffs and the cop has his knee on his artery here cutting off the blood flow to his brain and uh the guy's on the ground saying i can't breathe i can't breathe please stop there are a couple onlookers saying stop stop doing this stop doing this why don't

you just put him in the car you know if you need to restrain him you put him in the back of a police car that thing's like what did the cops say that he did forgery forgery forgery now it's not on camera but it appears there was some resisting arrest because the cop said we tried to put him in the back of the car for 10 minutes that didn't work so me and my pro-cop bias were like oh so this guy resisted arrest that's why they're giving him the business and you know it was like a accident and but you're watching it, and he just keeps doing it and keeps doing it. And the choke keeps going and going, and you're like six minutes into it. And at one point, the guy passes out, right?

The guy's dying because we cut off the blood flow to his brain. And the onlookers with the cameras and stuff are like, he's out. Stop. Now, I finished a couple and stuff are like, he's out. Stop. Now, I finished a couple of chokes to where people passed out. I've been on the other side too. If you stop, it turns out okay. If you keep cutting off that blood flow, the guy can die. How long in the video was his knee on the guy's neck?

Something like six or seven minutes. Yeah, it seems way too fucking long the fuck right the cop kid and i it's this this is just me projecting on him he seemed to like it he seemed to be happy that he was alphaing this dude and the cop wasn't very alpha i beat this cop in an arm wrestling competition i'm sure of it he wasn't like some jacked alpha cop he was older and thinner and just but he got the guy in cuffs he probably allowed himself to be in cuffs and he's got his knee on his neck and he seemed to be just posing choking and you know the only way you can choke a guy with a knee on neck is if the other person lets you the other person stopped

resisting arrest to the extent that the cop killed him and uh and i was i got to the point where the onlookers are like hey he's out he's unconscious take your knee off his neck and he didn't he kept the blood choke going until the guy died and then they took his lifeless body and put it on, uh, is it called a gurney? You know, the little bit with wheels that goes in the back of an ambulance. Then they,

they put them on the gurney and you, he wasn't coming to, and then they put the gurney and the ambulance and they take it off where they say he died in the hospital sometime later. He very well could have been dead when they threw him on the gurney. That's what they always say. Yeah. They always say that. Yeah, I know an EMT or two,

and EMTs don't declare somebody dead. They keep working on the patient until they get to the hospital where a doctor declares them dead. So I think that's the situation here. That guy died on the street to the choke, and then they reported it as if he died later in the hospital but maybe dumb question this was in minneapolis and that's why we're getting minneapolis yeah it was in minneapolis uh the the victim was a black guy and the cop was a white guy which always you know just

makes it that much more inflammatory and uh um so in minneapolis i guess they're rioting in a pretty intense way. AutoZone on fire, maybe Target on fire. Do I have this right? A bunch of places on fire. Lots of places on fire. It looks like right now a Verizon store is getting looted and a vitamin shop and a noodles and company. I don't know what you could possibly garner from rioting and looting a noodle store. Chiz has a couple of videos here.

Do you want to? I haven't pre-watched them, but you want to... But I'm sure they're... Sure, I'm not... I feel like... I kept up on the story. What are they like? Straight off the road. I think this is looters.

Tweet videos. Oh, oh, okay. No, these... I was afraid it was going to be like... It's harder than it was in the past to share a few seconds of hockey game or CNN or whatever. Yeah, this is like

some cell phone footage off Twitter. We can't watch that top one. It says that someone's being stabbed. Well, let me watch them. Yeah, pre-watch a little. It's hard for me to do accidentally sharing and stuff. Oh, no! Oh, no! Wait.

She's trying to get the show taken off the air. I can't... Okay, I have no idea what can you describe what you see is it two protesters stabbing each other i haven't seen anything that we can't show yet it's outrageous though it's an old lady a very overweight and the caption on the video is she's stabbing people i haven't seen that yet but i did see someone run up to her and blow a fire extinguisher right in her. Okay. We're good. We can watch this.

Okay. Yeah. It doesn't, nobody's actually getting stabbed here. What, um, what do I click on? It's that top one.

It's got a gentleman with red pants on. All right. Um, I'm lighting it up. I think what this is um is a lady in a motorized wheelchair uh parked in like the uh in the doorway of some sort of a retail store and maybe she's literally stabbing looters i'm ready are you guys ready yeah 33 second video ready set play oh what that guy just wing at? Ah, America.

All right, now the second video, the second video is apparently the aftermath of the first video. Okay. It's pretty hard to figure out what's going on. This is going to be great. Sorry I falsely accused you of bad videos. Yeah, she's

standing, she's parked in the doorways of this retail store stabbing looters with a knife. In her motorized wheelchair. Yes. That's the important part of what can we watch this? The second video, right?

Ready? Set. I'm ready. Play. They're getting her good. Now they're all throwing things at her. Look at her. Look how dirty her wheelchair is.

She bumped into the door. She can't see. People grabbed my wheelchair. They stole my keys. They stole everything they could off of me. I got maced. I got covered with fire extinguisher stuff. I've already seen the EMTs and they told me to go home. Somebody just had milk and I'm supposed to help with mace.

Then just go home, lady. Then just go home, lady. So the story is she was stabbing people near the exit of Target. Was she though? Yeah. I have no idea. What I'm getting from this, hopefully I'm right, is that she had decided to end the looting at Target. Yes. And protect the building and their merchandise by herself.

This woman in a motorized wheelchair. Robocop, as she calls herself. And then the looters yelled she was stabbing, which wasn't clear on the video. I don't know if she was or wasn't. Yeah, there's too much fire extinguisher. And then once the crowd heard that she was stabbing, they spread with the fire extinguisher hilariously,

and I guess winged some other things at her and threw things and hit her. Yeah, you could hear things hitting the wall behind her for sure. See, everybody thinks that fire extinguishers are a silly thing to shoot somebody with because in the movies you always either see two kinds of fire extinguishers. The super fake one that shoots

whipped cream. That's just some cartoon nonsense. And the other one that almost never exists, which is the CO2 fire extinguisher that like freezes stuff. And it's like, you're like, end up a little frosty. That is a chemical fire extinguisher. That shit is nasty. That I've been, we, we went into this factory. Yeah. My cousin and I broke into a factory when we were like 12 and we started spraying these fire extinguishers in the air that were in the factory and we nearly choked to death because the air was full of that chemical it's really awful to be around mine wasn't bad it was it shot a dust it looked like that one i used it in my kitchen when there was a fire then my wife accused me of like drama she was frying

something with grease then there was a grease fire that had left the pan and spread to the rest of the oven i fairly quickly got the fire extinguisher and put it out and she's like you just wanted to use it it was an appropriate time to use the fire where's yeah thanks for saving the house like i would have liked that response not but okay wow it was out of the pan it's been weighing on you for a while if it's in the pan you put a lid on it if it's extended to like the rest of the stove and possibly the counter like that thing and it's yeah i don't know three or four feet tall it's fire extinguisher time it'd be one thing if she had already gotten like a pound of salt and she was getting ready to like put this out. But she was probably standing there like, oh no.

Yeah, I was pretty quick active. The fire extinguisher was right outside the kitchen door. So it was like 12 feet away. I just got it and put it out. It was a good call. I would do it again. I want to find more riot footage. Yeah.

So I, that cop, have you seen the footage of the cop killing that dude kyle i've seen images of his of him kneeling on the guy's neck you have to watch it play out over six or seven minutes i like i said i started thinking that you know like like okay that guy had like a heart condition and a problem, the one that said I can't breathe in New York. And I think that if the cop had treated me the same way, I'd have survived it. But that guy, you know, was already unhealthy and you got to be more careful. Okay, I came into it thinking that with this guy.

He just held a kind of choke on him. A kind of choke you can only do to an unresisting person. Like, you know, on the UFC, you never see them, like, put this on someone's neck against the cage. Because that choke is so easy to break. You know, you just break it apart. Like, they're not controlling your body. You've got everything, every leg, arm, head to defend yourself. If I put two hands on your neck like that,

that's a choke that I only succeed in if you allow me to. Or if it's a woman. Trust me, they can't break that choke. They'll scratch the fuck out of you, though. The cop had a choke that was as easy to break as rolling over in bed. You know, just roll over sideways, the knee slides off your neck. It's not a problem. That guy wasn't resisting in the slightest, which is my central point.

He didn't resist all the way until he died. Yeah, when you were describing it, I was getting kind of short of breath. I don't think I want to see that. The idea of that makes me a bit claustrophobic yeah and then yeah like i said earlier you know like you can finish a choke to where the guy passes out you let go the blood rushes back everything's cool i've to hold a choke until the dude dies I've to hold a choke until the dude dies to where they let go and he just stays dead. Like it was a murder. By the fact that like YouTube is absolute trash now,

like trying to find real footage of Minneapolis riots or protests, whatever the right keywords are. All you fucking get on the front pages are CNN, ABC today, Fox, the Hill the hill that's that's the way that's the way youtube wants it i know it's the way they want it but it's fucking bullshit last night i was on youtube watching a simulcast live stream of memphis la and minneapolis like so it was good last night yeah Yeah, the live stuff is always good. Like, back with the

Ferguson riots, there was a lot of good live stuff on YouTube. Here's a little clip that I just found. This one's titled, uh, There's a dude with a fucking chainsaw in Minneapolis. Oh, I heard about him on my Twitch chat. Yeah, this guy sounds pretty cool. I have...

My Twitch chat theorized he was using a chainsaw so that he'd get new ammo. Because that's how Doom works. That's how Doom works. Ready, set, play. I'm following this fucking guy.

That's it. He's just walking for a bit bit did you hurt anyone with the chainsaw or was that don't mess with me chainsaw that's a don't mess with me chainsaw that's how the cameraman made it seem i think all chainsaws are don't mess with me chainsaws if you want them to be though yeah that guy's chainsaw gives my chainsaw size envy like i've never seen a come hither chainsaw like a 14 inch blade on it is that what it's called the blade i don't know one of those little ones it's like that i feel like those are more dangerous yeah that's how you can make figure eights to the face you could be a lot more violent with one of those than one of those like you'd have a harder time like you know flanking me when i have a lighter more maneuverable chainsaw yeah i'd like to see a 12 or 14 inches

like pretty basic bitch chainsaw what are you gonna do with that well i'm gonna use it to chunk up the tree that fell on my fucking fence i still haven't done and the st louis riots that are sure to come i literally had a friend in my group chat of like a bunch of my high school buddies being like can't believe this isn't happening in st louis yet it's like are you retarded it's coming every time we lead the charge with the riots you know and the nonsense and so like people people standing in front of the or no there were a bunch of clips of that in atlanta i think i don't remember what event it was but when people were standing in front of the like a whole freeway blocking it off

yeah right yeah they were locking the freeways down everywhere around ferguson all right ferguson yeah but i know that uh i know they did that in atlanta a couple years after that so yeah a few of them got ran the fuck over too yeah you shouldn't block the road that's very that's not good that's where the cars are yeah that's where the cars are and if you if you get too close to some you know person in a car they might just fucking floor it you know I love those clips I love the clips I love the clips when the people stand in front of a fucking f-250 with smokestacks like that guy has ever made a reasonable decision in his life and challenge him to make the first one ever. You won't rub me over.

And he says, nay, sir. I'm driving $65,000 worth of bullshit here that I used to drive back and forth to work. You don't think I'll run you down? Yeah. He'll be serpentining'll run you down? Yeah. He'll be serpentining to make sure he hits you. Scott's about to buy another one of those fucking monstrosities. My cousin. One's not enough?

He bought one and then sold it when his job fluctuated. And he's he bought like a gigantic diesel, I don't know where it is 6.7 or 6.8 liter like big turbo diesel ford 250 and got rid of it for new listeners scott is kyle's cousin and good friend and i he's talking about he's like you know they got 0.9 financing on these things now and uh my dad's like, you could drive a Honda back and forth

to work. You're not a rancher. My uncle's like, well, that interest rate's not going to get any lower now, is it? I'm just like, I don't want to lose money on this. Exactly. I don't want to lose money on this. Tell me if I have this right. Don't welders get paid extra money for bringing a truck on the job site? Am I right? If he would work the way... So what he should be

doing is going out west to where they're putting in pipelines and getting those types of jobs where you get per diem and hotel and even, like you said, your truck is part of the... It gets its own paycheck. And in his type of situation, if you're going to get one of those trucks, you get a fucking trailer that goes behind it, like a, like a little motor home type deal. And you go to the fucking welding school. That's 30 minutes from

his house. And you get a couple of amateurs and be like, Hey, you come with me. You work for me and subcontract for me under this pipeline contract. I take 10% of your pay. You've got a place to stay. Plus, I'll help you with anything else you need. And I'm getting you the job. And he'd be making $280,000 a year or something. Instead, he works at a nuclear power

plant, which is still very good money. But you can drive a Honda Civic to the nuclear power plant. Yeah. There's no reason to... Well, I guess if you've already told him all those things there's no changing his mind he's gonna buy it he gets homesick he gets homesick he gets homesick you should have seen us when we'd be across country like getting pussy and fucking literally fucking whores and blowing up buses and like out in the desert

like i'm like this is just like the outlaw josie wales scott we're in the desert look at that that's a tumbleweed come on let's go blow up a mountain tomorrow i really want to get home to my girlfriend i'm just like fuck four fuck that hot mexican chick over there that's staring at you i had a friend in high school like that literally you take him two or two two or three towns over, and he had like a pull, like a thirst to get back into his hometown. And at home, he was real territorial, right? Like our high school was the Red Rebels or something like that. And Red Raiders.

Anyway, yeah, he's got the high school bumper sticker on it, and he's proud of red, and he likes being home, and he feels like if someone from some other high school is in our town then you know we should bump their shoulder or something on the high school for town it was just like like he was just a territorial dude like that and he didn't like being out of his own home i was an honor student at Red Raider Elementary. Still, he's 45. Plus 73. Jesus Christ, he's wearing his Letterman jacket still. I never understood that homesick nonsense.

It's like, we're grown-ass men. We're having an awesome time. We're going out every night and having just a ball, and there's hot girls everywhere just hanging out with us. And then during the day, we're playing with helicopters and miniguns and shit and your job is to hold a camera and you're making a huge amount of money like yeah the fuck it's ridiculous i kind of want to go back to that tiny tiny town i'm from and see my girlfriend what why i'd be fine if we never saw that town again ever so i got that i got that thing taken off my eye last week and uh and and what do you ask me like like you know is it wasn't cancer or anything was it and i was like no no the uh the

doctor assured me that because there were eyelashes growing through it that's a that's a sign it's not cancer well they call me uh friday and they go so it's cancer. They call me Friday and she's like, she's like, the doctor would like to talk to you about your test results. And I'm like, okay, well, you know, tell me. And she's like, well, he wants you to come in. And I'm like, that's not a good sign. Well, I can't come in. My dad just had come in that day.

So like he literally has walked in the door like as I'm on the phone. And I'm like, I can't come in today. And it's Memorial Day weekend. So like it's going to be Tuesday, which is Tuesday, a couple days ago, before I can get in there and actually see this guy. I'm like, it'll be Tuesday before I can get in there to see him. Just tell me. And she's like, hang on, I'm going to get him. And I'm like, oh, this is bad. And the doctor comes on. He's like, ah, so, um, I was wrong. Um, the test results came back. It's, it's cancer.

You, you have cancer. And I'm like, ah, well well that sucks he's like yeah we're gonna have to he's like he's like lumberg on uh an office yeah we're gonna need to go back into your eye on saturday and uh remove a little more skin on sunday and get clean margins for Monday so that you don't die. And I'm like, well, that'd be great. Can you go? So I don't know.

Go ahead. What's the question? I didn't understand the timeline. They're going in on Saturday to get, ah, no, that's a, that's an office space reference because,

Oh, I'm sorry. Come in on, on Saturday and Sunday. Sharper than marble. Sharper than marble. Right. Yeah. It'd be different if you hadn't seen that movie many times. face uh reference because oh oh i'm sorry come in on on saturday and sunday sharp as a marble sharp as a marble right yeah it'd be different if you hadn't seen that movie many times and referenced it in any case in any case um got a little little bit of the cancer um they don't think it's spread anywhere else but we're gonna do some scans or blood tests or what have you and

find out for sure yeah and. And, uh, and, uh, my doctor is a plastic surgeon. That's his like primary, uh, thing he does. And, uh, so he's going to take like a very small wedge from like the bottom of my top

eyelid and then bring it all together. And, and, uh, he assured me there'd be like no scarring or anything. He's like, I deal with people who have car accidents and it literally like rips their whole eyelid apart and i piece those things back together like puzzle pieces with very minimal scarring so i'm i'm good with that you're gonna look great if you have a little

bit of an eye scar you're gonna look hardcore oh i want if they do that i'm gonna ask him for a cal drogo i'm gonna just get it to run all the way through or an omar i don't want an omar no the omar is man would you get an omar all drug was intense the omar is even more the omar is is not the kind of look i'm going okay first of all real side thing i want you to introduce yourself to every guest we have from here on out as a cancer survivor oh i'm i'm putting that one right here i can make cancer jokes forever now i don't give a fuck i'm really jealous of your ability i got my c-card now and you don't even have to steal it you don't even have to steal cancer valor just don't answer what kind of cancer you have they're like oh my god what kind you go i don't want to talk about

it john mcafee style What kind of torture was it? It was fluffy fingers. It's when they get you and just tickle you and won't stop. They killed my dog. I'll tell you that much. Thanks, Kyle. They cut off all my hair. So you're talking about wire stuff this character

we can't leave the cancer thing that enough cancer talk let me talk about this hbo show from 2005 you're not gonna believe it all right who cares about your t-cells omar little that's what it's about and it's 2002 Who cares about your T-cells? Omar Little. That's what it's about. And it's 2002. I'm sorry. Can you keep updating us?

What do we got? You know, I'll go back into this. I haven't called him yet. I should have to arrange the next surgery. I'll probably call tomorrow or whatever. I've had a lot of stuff going on. But I'm going to call and schedule the next surgery and go get it. i'll get fit and all uh woody's favorite drug it'll uh so i'll be really out of it so i won't have to feel them cutting my eyelid if they ask you how you feel there are two

answers anxious or nervous either one of those i'm already in pain yeah that's that's the point of the fentanyl like yeah yeah i'm anxious i'm scared shit like that yeah uh i i talked that's the main thing i asked him on the phone i asked about scarring and asked about anesthesia and uh and he's like no scarring lots of anesthesia oh those are the answers you want those are the answers you want. So yeah, they'll cut a wedge. They'll make sure they got clean margins. Sew me up. And I ordered a really fucking cool eye patch off of Etsy that's handmade. Yeah. So I'll be rolling that thing.

And I'm not going to spoil it. But it's one of those movie, video game, like iconic eye patches that I'm going to. I feel like it'll look pretty nice. Cool. Iconic eye patches. Yeah. I look forward to it. Is that what you look pretty nice. Cool. Iconic eye patches. Yeah. I look forward to it. Is that what you Googled?

No, it's not what I Googled. Yes. Yes, it's what, no, yeah. I Googled custom made eye patches and,

and it led me to an Etsy link where some fucker makes these like leather, fancy eye patches from a certain property. So I ordered it. That can not be a very large marketplace to serve. He, there was only one for sale. I got the last one. So either they're very hot or that's the only one I ever made.

Either way, limited edition. I'm telling you, hon, as soon as the first one orders and gets the word out there, we're going to be selling them like hotcakes might be right you guys might out there might see my cool eye patch and be like god damn that's a good look kyle i found two cool eye patches i think i know which one is yours i will spoil it link it in here and i'll confirm or deny

should we solidarity purchase eye patches oh that'd that'd be cool, boys. Get the Mad-Eye Moody one from Harry Potter. That'd be cool. I don't know. Oh, well, you really should get into it. That's the exact one I bought. I bought that one. You'll notice there are no more of those for sale. That is the one I bought.

It was Woody's first guess. Yep. Nailed it. $30. Looked like Solid Snake. It says ships's first guess. Nailed it. It looked like a solid snake. It says ships in one to two business days. Oh, it's on the way. Oh, I ordered it as soon as I got the diagnosis. Oh, well, you know, it's a really serious

diagnosis. Doc, am I going to get lots of drugs? What are your recommendations on eye patches? Well, we'll provide one to you at the hospital. No, I are your recommendations on eye patches well will you we'll provide one to you at the hospital no i was talking about serious eye patches i'm looking to style and profile do you understand like you'll turn the pk trip we have to have like an intervention with kyle being like kyle you got to take off the patch man it's It's been five or nine months. He's like, this is who I am now! I'm a patch man!

And the patch was fine, but you're carrying a scimitar and the peg leg. The parrot is shitting everywhere, Kyle! No matter what you say, you're not teaching it to say anything. It's saying race and death offense during the time you play in your car! It's made our trips

outside very uncomfortable here in Atlanta. The Jews control the world. Shut up. I think they'd be saying a different word if it was listening to hip-hop. I found a pretty cool eye patch, but $96? $96? Yeah, you want to see that? Does it restore sight?

What the fuck is that thing? The dragon eye that that oh that's that's the gayest thing i've ever seen well now that i look at it through that lens when your good eyes looking over here and you got one straightforward dragon eye you're not gonna look intimidating you're gonna look ridiculous oh the dragon eyes this one oh what the hell is this one modern steampunk eye patch that doesn't even seem to cover the eye that's awful well i mean i know now that you say it i see it i can see this bitch's eye through the through the screen it's the fact that the dude isn't you know he's low t if the model was a little higher t maybe you'd pull off better that's a handsome man i don't know what you're talking about he's got

the little chin cleft a handsome man but he still has the peach fuzz on the side of his chin his jawbone there why is this shirt made of lug nuts and screws and nails washers and shit yeah you know what i'm not buying from this person. I'll find another seller. Oh, we haven't done any ads yet. Yeah, it's time. Humble Bundle. Humble Choice is the PC gaming subscription

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I sign my dad up. Especially the ladies. Dad had a lady over the other day. He had never had her over before. It's kind of weird to get to his address because it's kind of like a hidden driveway. So he has this lady come to the driveway that leads to his farm instead because it's easier to see from the highway. And so he's parked in like his like ATV thing.

Like it's like a, I don't know what to call it. It's one of those big... It's got a dump bed on the back and two rows of seats. Anyway, it's a big ATV thing. He's got all these dogs that he's rescued that people have dumped out. He's literally got

three or four farm dogs with him all the time. They live at the farm and he takes care of them. Well, she pulls up, gets out of her car, and he notices she's slurring her speech a little bit. And he's like, Oh, that's never a good sign. Well, sometimes it's

a good sign, but probably not right now. That's not good. And right as he's noticing that the dog, two of the dogs start having the most ridiculous dog fight of all time. They're wrote that one of them has bit the other one on the neck, and they've both started rolling like two fur balls, just screaming and howling and growling. And he's trying to stop them, get them apart. Well, he was parked right over a creek. There's like a drainage pipe that runs under the road, and he was parked right on top of it. The dogs roll into the creek, and he quickly sees that if he doesn't intervene, one of the dogs is literally going to drown the other one in the fucking creek.

And the woman is screaming. And so he runs down the bank, jumps into the creek, and one of the dogs is literally holding the other one under the water, fucking drowning it. And so he reaches down in the water and grabs the drowning. Was that a police dog by chance? No, that's the one that fucking Kitty's got at house i wish it would drown in a bowl his dog he pulls the drowning dog up out of the water and he looks behind him and she has rolled down the fucking bank and she's in the creek too now she was like all dressed up and

now she's like chest deep in the creek and so he hands was all dressed up and now she's chest deep in the creek. He hands her a dog. He's like, here, take this one. He gets the other one. They're fighting to get toward each other and finally he's slapping the dog around like, stop! The dog stopped. They start climbing up the bank.

It's Georgia so it's this red, muddy clay that we have here. It's gross. They get up the top of the bank. When they started this fucking meeting, they've only known each other for 10 minutes now. When they started, they were both dressed really nicely. They're dressed for a date, essentially.

And now they are both soaking wet and covered in mud. And she just has made it to the top of the bank to where the road is again and he starts to like sort of like well that was kind of crazy huh and she trips and falls and rolls all the way back down into the creek again and now three stooges shit yes so now she crawls all the way back up and she's now she's just completely filthy she's covered in this mud

she's got like creek weed on her or whatever the fuck and and he's like all right we've we've got to clean up this is ridiculous she follow me back over to my house so she gets in her car and he gets on his little uh atv and he didn't put her in the bed she's a mess it was her car so he didn't care if she messed it up or not i guess so they drive to his house and he's like, we got to get a shower. So they both get into the shower naked together. And I'm like, ah, this thing's going to work out nicely. She's like, yeah.

And he's like, she's still slurring her speech a little bit, but she seems to be okay. So she's like, I'm going to wash your back. And he's like, all right, sounds good to me. So he passes her the soap and she's washing his back and everything, and they're in the shower. And all of a sudden, he hears, she has fallen out of the shower, grabbed the shower curtain, and on the way down, she's ripped every shower ring as she fell.

Bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing. Fallen headfirst into the toilet, which is next to the shower. What a careless bitch. She's fallen onto the toilet and knocked the toilet off of its, like, base. Does she have Parkinson's? Now there's water flooding. Now there's water flooding. Because she has broken the toilet.

She's hit it at the perfect angle. She's fallen out of the shower hit the top of like like the toilet and knocked it over and the water is flowing up now how large is this woman regular size she just hit it just right apparently okay so it's gracious they get out still a little soapy but they dry off anyway because goddamn we've got a new problem to solve so he gets the water cut off to that he like turns the the knob or whatever and that's all good although now we're down to three toilets in the two toilets in the home and gotta keep your eye on this one and she's knocking them

out left and right you got water damage to deal with now probably his tile floor it'll be fine but but so so then like he puts her clothes and his clothes into the washing machine. And he's had that washing machine for at least 10, 12 years or something like that. It's not like a new fancy digital one. It's the old like crank the knob kind of washing machine. So puts all the clothes in there, grabs her some like pajama type clothes. He puts on some clothes and he's like, let's let's step out on the back porch and just relax for a minute. Would you like a beer? She's like, yes. They each get a beer and they go to the back porch.

He's got a nice little back porch area. You can sit in a swing. He's got a little garden out there. The swimming pool is just beyond that. It's a nice little place to hang out and chill. What's she wearing? His clothes? Did you say that? He had some pajamas or something he put in. Some sweatpants, a t-shirt, whatever. While he had some pajamas or something he put it in i don't know some sweatpants a t-shirt whatever well while he had gone to get the beers she had started tinkering with the washing machine because she wanted cold cold not hot cold on her clothes she didn't want them to shrink or whatever god well when the bull because she changed to cold cold mid cycle, she has confused the washing machine. When they walk back into the laundry room from like this little back porch area, the whole laundry room is flooded. So is the kitchen.

So is the kitchen and the bathroom, which is attached. Now the bathroom is flooded again. The kitchen is flooded completely. And the entire laundry room, which is a big laundry room, as big as this whole room I'm in, flooded, flooded, flooded. The whole washing machine is overfilling, overfilling. And he's like, the fuck did you do? What have you done now? And, you know, what you were saying, that's reasonable.

I would put to you that it is not if i go to someone's let's say i go to kyle's house or your house and i fall out of the shower and my head shatters the porcelain everywhere that's possible you know how many things in your house i'm gonna touch from that second on zero i'll i'll be letting you guys open the fridge for me to get a soda. I'll be like, hey, Kyle or Woody, do you mind if I grab... Now watch the whole process. I remember. Got it? And we're done. I would not be fucking around with settings on your office desk. This is how we use a toilet.

Notice no headbutts. I would fall into it. Outside of the shower. That's totally her fault. You should not be fucking with settings on people's appliances after you do something like that. You should be thankful they're not kicking you out.

Okay. She spent the night. He wakes up the next morning. Wakes up the next morning. Can't find her. Where is she? Where's she gone? He thought the worst. He's's like what has she done now he throws open the bedroom door runs into the living room looking around for a fire

or or a hole in the entire wall of the house or a car parked in the kitchen a kool-aid man shaped hole in the side. Now I'm taking off my jacket. Inspect your septic tank. Or like, she's going to check the attic insulation and her feet are just hanging from the ceiling kicking.

It's like some fucking Home Alone shit. But... She slips on a bunch of marbles and steps on them. Turns out the bed was just too stiff for her. She went to sleep on the couch.

He put her in her car, directed her toward her home, and he has not seen her since. What happened? Your child, she succumbed to the full paint can top of the stairs. She dodged the first two, don't they all? No one expects the third can. I'm a fool. I was secretly hoping that shared experience was the beginning of a relationship.

Ah, he'll keep fucking her. The man's good around the house, all right? A trip to Home Depot is a little vacation to him. He's going to love fixing that stuff up. Excuse me, sir. I know more than you. Or Hank Hill. I think they took that right from fucking King of the Hill.

Yeah, they did. Yeah, is your dad a Hank Hill kind of guy where it's almost like something is broken and he's excited to get working on it? Because I've always wished I could be that guy. But when something breaks around my house, I'm like, this sucks. I need to call a real man. Um, it depends what's broken. If it's a, if it's someone with a car, he's, he really enjoys working on cars and he's a, he's, he's really knowledgeable. As long as it's not fuel injected,

because he doesn't have all the diagnostic equipment to diagnose computers and stuff like that. But as long as it's fuel injection, um, you know, he built and raced race cars for years, carbureted, uh, he built and raced race cars for years. So he's really good with engines, transmissions, and you know, the whole drive train and stuff. And then he owned a paint and body shop for many years as well. So anything paint and body, he's really good at too. And he taught himself up upholstery. So he likes doing car stuff um i don't know that's not titillating him it's not titillating but he's proficient in all of it except for hvac we call he we always called an hvac guy um hvac that's like that's like the mob you got to go through

them you need to call anthony kumia i'm glad you said that. One, it's hard to buy HVAC parts. If you buy a car, there are libraries dedicated to how to work on that car. Even if it's a new, fuel-injected, tricky one, there's a Hanes manual out there that explains it to you and tells you how to use your multimeter to do your best and such. HVAC?

It's simple, in theory, but there's no information on how to fix things on your own yeah it is incredibly difficult yeah they're like the mop and they they they really try to upcharge you on everything like tons of inflation on the parts um i remember he got he got the hvac excuse me fixed once and then he found like a list of the parts and saw how much they'd upcharged him and he called and complained he was like he's like i'm not gonna pay this i'm not gonna pay this i'm absolutely not you can come pick the parts up take them back out of my fucking like like heater hvac system

because like like you're charging me 350 percent what this part cost and 280 percent what this car part cost and i was already paying you 35 an hour like no no come come get your shit and they just cut the bill like from like 1200 to 300 or something yeah good for him i feel like i've had that experience without the negotiating like skill you know i i paid 5700 for a new it's called a gas pack it does your heat and ac in one unit and 5700 this is a long time ago too like back in the apex house and it was just so much and it was not even like a major brand like train or something and they made us feel like we were lucky they i think they genuinely did prioritize us because we only had one as opposed to like one for each floor and we had

like a kid one of the babies one of the kids was a baby so they kind of did us first but they did us hard yeah those people are shitty yes they'll i've dealt with some of them who would quote 12 000 on a job and then you get another guy and it'd be 1500 it's like that is a loot who's getting 12 000 how far in my ass was he trying to break it off god damn you guys have been homeowners much much much longer than I have

HVAC full of crooks apparently what other little industries do I need to be wary of pretty much anyone in the home inspector is going to be sketchy you need to really look at what kind of warranty comes along with or guarantee comes along with their work make sure they're going to be sketchy. You need to really look at what kind of warranty comes along with, um, or guarantee comes along with their work. Um, make sure, make sure they're going to be liable. Yeah. And the home inspectors, you have to check the motivations, right? So a lot

of home inspectors get their work from real estate agents, right? And it's to their advantage to give that house the thumbs up. If I, if you're an agent and I'm an inspector and I start ruining deal after deal, you find a new inspector. Now, if they do a bad job, that opens them up for other liabilities. So they have to kind of thread the needle there. But if you hire the home inspector, you know, if you say, oh, if the real estate agent's like, I'll get the, I'll get you a good one. You know, you don't know anything about inspectors. I'll take care of it for you. You say, no, thank you. I can Google. You hire your own home inspector so that his motivation is to serve you.

See, that's what I should have said. Because you know how, obviously, when you're buying a house, you get a home inspector to come out there and do everything. And I had this person recommended to me by family. And they missed obvious shit. Like there were gutters that weren't connected the right way and that we're gonna fuck up if someone hadn't noticed afterward and fixed it the dishwasher straight up did not close and had stagnant water sitting in it missed that oh that's under what i

was looking at uh appliances were covered and so i that they should have according to my home warranty company they're like oh yeah if they would have caught that right away we would have replaced it and so i've gone on a back and forth with them trying to fix my fucking samsung dishwasher which apparently according to every guy who comes out here they're like samsung huh they put five boards in it and it is just the most complicated dishwasher of all time you know what you should get you should get a whirlpool it has a button that says wash and then it washes kitty has a samsung washer and dryer i've heard about them and i'm not in the business or anything they're like famous is it neptune chance? That's a model. Understand.

It's like it's metallic gray and it's all digital. And I have to period. I can take that son of a bitch apart like a goddamn NASCAR pit crew. I have the tools that do it all together with the right bits on them. I go over there and I'm like, and she's out of the pits and ready to wash again in 3.5 minutes it sounds like it must be it has a it has a filter um it's like the last like thing to stop junk from like going down into like the the wastewater line and it clogs routinely on things that shouldn't clog on.

Now you wash a condom and it's going to end up down in there and that causes a problem. I guess maybe I understand that. Right. Sorry. I left the condom in my, in my stuff. Kitty whoopsie daisy.

I'm the one that had to clean it out. It's not gross. I don't fuck. I was fucking suck that bitch clean. It's already been washed. It just went through the washer it's fine that's the other thing when you pull so you have to take the the the door off the washer like the like the big like porthole clear door that has to come off the top of the washer

comes off the entire control panel comes off and uh one of the entire and the entire front of the washer has to come off all these things have to come off so that you can get in there and you like put your hand in this hole turn a thing a quarter turn and then pull it out and then it's full of junk like lint and rubber bands and like money a lot i've been a 20 bill last time i figured that was my tip for doing the job and and just junk and it smells like actual shit because it's like stagnant like gross water has been like soaking denim lint for weeks and weeks and weeks i guess and it's just like rotten in there yeah and it does that every month every every two months at least i've taken it apart so many times i can't i can't count them is this a new washer she has it's probably five years old

now but it was brand new when we got it you know it's inexcusable every month you can watch the you go to the youtube video you like type in samsung whirlpool whatever it's called like neptune whatever that model is it's like how to fix clogged drain this guy takes a sawzall and cuts a hole right through the front of the whole fucking washing machine so he doesn't have to do all that shit i just described again he just like you look at his and he's got this huge jagged u-shaped hole in the front of his washing machine he's like fixed it it's like an operation with the get your hand in there without touching the sides he's made the whole so goddamn big

it's not a problem i found the video immediately this video of samsung washer won't drain easy to do yourself fix wa45h7000aw 210 000 views. Do you think their SEO is optimized? No. It's so many people. At least 10,000 of those views are mine because it took me a while to memorize how to do that. That's funny. It's 200,000 views to fix a Samsung washer. This guy's biggest video is him doing that.

I can see why kitty bought it and the dishwasher too samsung appliances have the best curb appeal like and they they look wonderful in the showroom and they often get prime like if you go to a home depot or something prime locations they're on the end cap and the two of them are next to each other and they're sitting on top of pedestals that maybe you put i don't know soap in or something so that they're like neck high you just and everything looks so wonderful looks like what you want in your house but the owner experiences are notorious yeah beautiful some fridge is perfect works great apparently much easier to work a fridge than a i think six months old hasn't given me a problem in its entire lifetime.

That is true. It's cold. My washer, dryer are Whirlpool and my fridge, I think, is Samsung. Maybe that's even Whirlpool. I don't fucking know. But I do know that they are all brand fucking new and that the people I bought the house from were not happy when I demanded that those be included

in the price. So they are... My washer and dryer are real fucking nice but yeah my dishwasher that was a big mistake big mistake not to get that replaced i bought a brand new washer and dryer uh last year and uh i just got a basic one i think it was like 1300 for the pair something like that like 750 800 each like maybe 16 maybe 14 1500 with taxes and everything i fucking love them they work so well i got no problem with there were like there was like 2200 sets and i was like how much cleaner are those people's clothes that got the they paid an extra grand for their washer these old fuckers that i bought this house from apparently fell for that and got the real expensive washer

dryer i remember it was before i bought this house we had that discussion where you were like you could take a shit into a washer it's gonna be fine and i was like that's not true and then looking at this one i could take the foulest on my clothes and it's coming out squeaky clean that's true i can see you work in marketing and i look forward to your advertising campaign soupy dump all over my own clothes to prove a point billy mays here taking a steamy dump i'm gonna show you how oxyclean gets it out of it oh we've got oxyclean, by the way. That was okay. R.I.P. Billy Mays. He had the funny commercials. Poor guy. And he was so coked out of his mind

during all of those. That's how he got so excited for cleaning products. Yeah. We got kablam here. Look at this. Fucking hooker I killed last night. Blood all over the carpet. Fucking spray it. Dabs right up. I don't think he killed the hooker but maybe he did

so tell me about the wire so the wire this character zig i mean season two the doc season and i think that i underestimated when you guys said that's the doc season i didn't think every fucking scene would be at this bar or at this dock i'm already i'm like five episodes in to season two or so and i'm already getting bored with the doc shit ziggy the son of the uh union guy i i hate him more than ramsey i hate him more than Jeff King Joffrey. He is so unlikable. I can't get over him. I want him to die so bad. I love that scene where he's talking shit to some wigger retard on the side of the street

and being like, you better have my full money next time. You think I'm playing with you? You know who you're messing with? Wearing his $2,000 Italian leather jacket. He looks like a fucking retard in. And then immediately after that, he gets in his his car robbed by a bunch of actual gangsters and he's like weeping and crying i love that scene because fuck ziggy but yeah this guy he's gotta die he's too i can't decide yet if he's so unlikable he's gonna die or if he's so unlikable

they're gonna i have empathy for ziggy i so here's the thing he wasn't gifted with any kind of like physique you know this guy's biceps are no bigger than his wrist that's huge cock true that's we'll circle down that but like he lives in a world of like union workers tough guys you know a place where ability to win a fight like matters more so than you know somebody's department but he's born into last place he just is there's nothing he can do about it and when he's dealing with drug dealers or all the crime side of it he's unequipped you know he's just unable to compete and he's trying to be tough he's's trying to – and his father left some pretty big footstep, their shoes to fill.

So he's trying to be the man, but he's just born into permachild. And what's he supposed to do? How is he supposed to thrive in this environment of dock workers? I see where you're coming from there a bit, but also it's like I don't think he was born in last place. He has a very powerful father within the union and if he were a halfway smart guy i feel like he could just be like all right i'm gonna put my nose to the grindstone here really demonstrate my value on

the docks and naturally have some upward mobility because of my father's place and instead he's like all right my dad's hardcore he's in the I'm going to be hardcore with drug dealers. And he's just not. He doesn't have the vibe for it. He looks like a bitch. He sounds like a bitch. I feel so bad for his, like, tall friend who is constantly trying to be like, hey, Ziggy man, like, can we, like, settle down a bit?

And can you just take the money and put it in your savings account? Put it in, you know, Chase Bank. And then that's it. And then he'll show up. That's his cousin. show up his cousin yeah his cousin and so i feel bad for the cousin because he seems to be it seems like ziggy is going to very soon hasn't happened yet put him in a position to do something horrible would be my guess based on how the plot's going because you'll like how it all turns out don't worry i hope ziggy's murdered uh horribly by the way. I hope he's killed in an awful way.

And I hope his cousin survives. And I do like the union boss, too. He seems like a nonsense kind of guy. Yeah, Frank Sabaka. I like him. I like Frank Sabaka. I had empathy for also. Right.

So Frank Sabaka does some bad things. But fuck, it's a means to an end. Right. He's trying to Frank Sabaka is is the union leader and he really cares about the people in his union and he's playing the head he's dealt too like it's not like he chose this yeah so he's he's doing some bad shit uh when other people do bad shit he's like man this is gonna hurt the union right not like that's what he cares about all the way to his core he wants the people that

he represents to thrive as best as possible in the best way possible so even when he decides to break some laws well it's not that he wants to be a criminal he's not self-enriching he's trying to i think bribe politicians or something so i like that guy yeah and he helps his own people too like when he's like, you want to switch to 47? Totally fine. I'll support you tomorrow. Just take this money. Go buy yourself a beer and a shot from whatever bar.

And then, like, it's his money, basically. Like, he's keeping his own guys afloat, even though the work isn't coming in. And so I like Frank Sabatka. Really, I like pretty much every character now. I'm pretty bummed out that Dee died because I liked Dee too. I did not see that. I didn't like Dee. Dee was trying to turn straight, and I liked that about Dee.

Dee was being a dumbass. All Dee had to do was say, yeah, Avon, whatever you say, and he'd have been out of fucking prison. Yeah, but he also had principle about it, and he was like, I don't want to live like this. And so I liked that about Dee. Yeah, it's too late to start growing some principles once you're doing fucking 10 years in the state pen.

Was it 20? It was 10. No, it was 20, and they thought he'd serve 10. That's what it is. Worse. Yeah, that's not the time to grow some fucking morals or something like that no no no no the time for that was before you made that little trip to nyc to pick up the bag

i know exactly logically i'm just saying i liked d as a character and so when he died i was very surprised by that especially the kind of answer and that's something that i've heard people is that a lot of the deaths in this show are very unceremonious you know even if they're a very major player they kill them there was no who was the chick we all liked from a game of thrones she had balls but she was like 13 lady of bear something of bear island mormon maybe like yeah mormon okay yeah all right so um she had a very ceremonious death where she goes down swinging against a giant or something like that. Dragon, who the fuck knows. It was a giant.

Was it? Yeah, very dumb. But in The Wire, you just get tapped. You just get choked. There's no big pomp and circumstance around it. If it had been tied in The Wire, it would have been her looking brave for half a second and then just a foot coming down.

Just an arrow hits her in the head. I'm on the final season right now and I'm not going to spoil anything, but a main character is going about their day. If I had to guess, I'd guess Omar because Omar is going to survive for a while now.

I don't think I've seen the end and my guess is McNulty, but I don't know. It would be so bummer if they kill McNulty. I like McNulty. It's the last season. You shoot on your wife, you pay the price. Oh, oh, end of first season. I was trying to tell you without spoiling it just how all the endings didn't quite line up.

Stringer, scot-freeott free barksdale that's his name right small you know two years d is okay all right well he gets it down to like 18 months and he was put in for seven but they're saying like he's giving a lot of dirt right now where i am kyle's right there's um uh there's a it's almost two terms They get seven and they say, I'll be serving two, which he gets even lower. So it's hard. Like I say he got two years, but Kyle says he got seven. There's two ways to look at it. Anyway, how bad the people were, how senior the people were,

has nothing, is totally unrelated to what kind of sentences they got. And that was the part that was eye-opening to me not shocking i know criminal justice system could work like that but the one that really took the biggest fall it's not the biggest dude he's not even the worst dude and there were other guys who didn't get prison at all they just didn't have anything on them but they were way worse i'm getting real tired of mcnulty on the boat very very tired of this i'm not used to it it is so fucking boring and then like i was like i was like sitting there watching it when um daniels is it daniel's the the guy who's uh the the black trainer in spartacus and he's the one, he's like, did I get to pick my own team? And I was like, yes! Yes!

They're going to get McNulty off the boat, finally! And then the major, or I'm sorry, the colonel, whatever his name is, I don't recall, it's like, everybody's fine, I'll approve every single person you pick, except for McNulty. McNulty stays on a boat. He either drowns or he retires.

God damn it. I want a boat. He either drowns or he retires. God damn it. I want him back. They seem to portray him as a total booze hound guy. Maybe that continues as the show goes on. Because the scene they just showed him is he's so miserable on the boats. He's waking up and chugging beers before he goes out there. Because he isn't enthralled by that life whatsoever so hopefully that changes if that goes past the second season i'm not going to

be pleased in season three they make it clear that he's one of like five or six guys who can pursue major crimes like that good good because i like mcnulty and i like uh bunk is he the black guy's friend bunk Bunk Moreland. Yeah, yeah. I like Bunk. Bunk and McNulty, good team. I like those guys. Yeah, yeah. They're my favorite little pairing.

Second favorite little pairing, or maybe a triage, is the woman who got shot and then the goofy-ass white guy and the black guy who are kind of like buddy cops in the first season. I like those three. Yeah. By the way, that's... The guy that plays Cedric Daniels is not the black guy from Spartacus.

They don't all look alike, Taylor. Jesus, Taylor. Wait, the guy who... He's not Zetus? The trainer from Spartacus is the same guy in the movie 300 who's the messenger who brings the crowns... He brings the crowns and

skulls of the kings that and i was like man he really beefed up that's so funny he's getting the rail here dude must have packed on 40 pounds of solid muscle i was literally watching and thinking i and i was like looking up when spartus started. I was like, man, this motherfucker got yoked. I don't know him, apparently. But no, I guess different guy. He was doing more than fighting crime, goddamn. But yeah, I like Daniels a lot. He seems like an honorable guy.

He's got some dirt in his ass, but I like him. I want to point this out to Taylor, though. Is it Negan? Who's the skinny white guy? What's his name? Ziggygy thank you thank you you hate ziggy you're supposed to hate ziggy you're bored of mcnulty on the boat they want you to be bored of mcnulty on the boat that's like the the pain that you're supposed to endure alongside of him you know you have these feelings about zabaka you know yeah he's got flaws but he's working

on behalf of the wire is getting from you everything they're trying to get from you and and i to its credit is where i'm headed he's right no you you're 100 right and i i know i'm supposed to hate ziggy because some of his well i didn't think you were i know like some of his scenes are so over the top rude like when he lit a cigarette with a hundred dollar bill as these hard-working men are sitting there like knowing they can't say shit because he's the son of their boss effectively it was like god ziggy i right after he's given money by his cousin that he's supposed to pay off and it's like you and then ziggy's like oh i'm flush you can buy a you can buy around but i can't i'm flush now and it's like bitch i, I'm flush. You can buy a round, but I can't. I'm flush now. And it's like, bitch, I just gave you $2,500 or $2,700 to pay yourself off

and get whatever the name of your car is back. So that drove me crazy. I hated that scene. Princess. Princess, yeah. Get your $2,700 bribe to get your car princess back. It's got a 350 in it, though. Everything about that guy is just begging to be respected.

And there's nothing that, I don't know, warrants respect. And he just doesn't know how to warrant respect. I love when they put him up to hitting that guy, that big dude on the docks. Dude is like 6'1", a solid 230. Killing him? No So Ziggy's got this problem with this big guy On the docks, you'll get to it

This isn't a terrible spoiler Oh you showed me this scene on the show before It's so good, they're like Come on, just walk up to him and truck him Ziggy You're a legend And the other guy pipes in, yeah Legend of the docks and they're like pumping ziggy up for days they're pumping him up until they're all by like the i don't know the

coffee truck by the docks and and the big boy like orders a cappuccino right like and ziggy's like cappuccino what a pussy and, yeah, he just looks big. I'm thinking like, yeah, he does look big. That's like an actor off the water near the dock. He's built like Taylor, but taller. Like this is a big boy. And he's got his back turned to Ziggy with a hard hat on. He's like doing some actual man construction type shit with a forklift,

checking inventory outdoors. And like, just walk up to him, give him your best punch and walk away. Truck his ass, Ziggy. And Ziggy just like walks up and goes for a kidney punch. And the guy just turns around like, the fuck? And just starts slapping the shit out of him, beats the shit out of him, and then puts him on the forklift, lifts him up, puts him on top of a fucking container 12, 15 feet in the air,

pulls the forklift back down and goes, anybody lets him down, I'm whipping your ass, and leaves him up there. There's more. So I remember it a little differently. He goes for the kidney shot like he says, but I don't think the guy beat him up there. There's more. So I remember it a little differently. He goes for the kidney shot like he says, but I don't think the guy beat him up. I don't think he gave him the honor of getting beat up. He just kind of manhandled him and took him to the forklift where they put him on top of shipping containers too high.

And he puts him up there, tells no one else that they're allowed to help him down. And the whole time ziggy's yelling you gave me bad advice you motherfuckers all gave me bad advice that was bad advice that was bad advice yeah no shit because he's not only an asshole he's a dumbass simultaneously he has no redeeming qualities none whatsoever like at no point are you ever like ah well he did that one no he didn't do anything like that to die soon hopefully we'll see or maybe a fate worse than death some would say oh staying in the show

he'll be there in season three he's going to the police academy he's mcnulty's new partner that's how mcnulty gets off the boat i would genuinely stop watching i'd be like no no off i'm gonna go watch and family guy reruns again i'm not yeah that would turn me off the show major ziggy what should we do yeah i like when i like when they're when uh when um uh the main gangster was um I like when the main gangster, B&B Barksdale, is in prison. And he's eating fucking KFC. And he doesn't just have a little KFC.

He's got like the family pack. He's got sides. He's got the fucking family sides. He's got like mashed potatoes and slaw. And I'm like, that's good shit he's got and that's the next thing he says he's like you better get in there's some good shit yeah it is god damn he's doing that you can see an xbox three or not even 360 just an xbox controller sitting there and i was like that was the one thing that i saw when they had d come in that i was like d he's living the dream

yeah he's eating as much KFC as he wants playing video games all day join the winning team here but I did still have some respect for D wanting to get out even if it was the dumb move I never ever liked D I think I just don't like how that actor looks and I don't talk about race

or anything like that he's just a weird looking fucking dude right with his bug eyes and that gap in his teeth. He's a little baby faced. Yeah. I see what you're talking about. That didn't bother me. I kind of like that he had a position of leadership in spite of that look. On the other hand, he was relative of the leader. So that's

probably why he did. Yeah. Yeah. He's being carried along and, you know, he murdered that guy. But he was smart. And which one did he murder? When we're first introduced to him, the whole reason for The Wire and the show is that D murdered a guy

when he was running one of the towers instead of either taking an ass whipping or using his fist. Instead of fighting it out, he pulled out a gun and murdered a man in the lobby of one of the towers that they were selling drugs out of.

Then he got demoted. And then that's how the wire gets started up because Judge Kalen or Kalen or whatever, he's like, how did I just lose this case? How did you guys lose this case? And McNult explains it to him and the ball goes through. That's when he gets moved to the pit and everything. And I don't remember. Okay, so under him in the pit is the guy who's dead now who plays black Panther.

I don't remember his name. Yeah. Michael B. Jordan Wallace was his name. Poot. Don't give two shits about Poot. Is he the one with the do rag thing? No,

no, no. What's the do rag guy's name? It's something with a D. Yeah. I like him. I can see his character developing and growing and I, he's interesting.

I like him. Yeah. One of my favorite characters is Michael. You'll meet him in, I think, season three or maybe I think season four, actually. Michael is like an eighth grader who has to really mature quickly. And he's like a badass eighth grader. And I like his character a lot. He's a real badass. It's been another fantastic recommendation.

Is anybody else jealous of my quarantine time that I had The Sopranos and The Wire to watch fresh? It's high quality content. I've been learning to paint. Get out of here. I've been enriching my soul. No, I'm not serious. I'm not a faggot. I was going to make fun of you.

Yeah, Monet over here. No. Yeah, I'm jealous. I wish I had something cool to watch like that. I've been watching fucking... Struggling with Rick and Morty trying to like that. I'm watching World of War... Warhammer 2 guides and shit like that. Learning to be better

at that game. I love that fucking game. But speaking of video games, Tarkov has wiped today. Today, Tarkov wiped. As soon as it was available to get online, I did. Which was 11am for me. I knocked out three or four games. It's nice and slick.

I think they've done some optimization. I forgot to turn my FPS counter on so I could visualize and see what was up, but it felt like I was getting 100 frames. The hideout responsiveness is way better now. Like the stash and the hideout. It used to be like, in this game you might switch from dealers to whatever.

It's just you don't expect things to take two and a half, three seconds. And now it's snappy like you used to yeah um i played two games the first one went great until the end like it's i go in there i've got my gun in my backpack really weak shit because it's a wipe and everyone has weak stuff i kill two scavs every slot on me is filled uh i am so close to the X fill. Like the whole point is like escape from Tarkov. And I am a 12 second walk from getting out. I greedily stopped by this little weapons crate, grab a pineapple juice,

drink it, skill my guy up a little bit as metabolism improves. And I think that walk allowed that, that, that eight seconds let someone catch up to me and i got shot just seconds from winning and it's like that's tarkov it hurts so much when you die and you know i have nothing we just wiped and now i have less than that next one comes along i made a bad play uh that one is a little easier to die for me to accept. There's a guy inside it was nighttime raid. I'm outside

where there's a little more light and I somehow thought that he would see me as poorly as I would see him but I had that backwards and he popped me in the head. One bullet end of life ouch. So I'm over two and then I had a

scab run that was successful and it's just Tarkov is back to hurting again. I used to be so rich in that game before the white that if i died like it was all cool like it was more about just having fun and not trying to get ahead i was ahead i had gotten ahead and now i have to start over i made it level 48 which is pretty good and uh it's fun i was running for the exfiltration with i i had a pair of night vision goggles i had found on uh on reserve today and you know it's like i don't even have a red dot for my gun but now i've got night vision i had them too on one of my i don't have a helmet to put them on but i got goggles i had that yeah i had that and i'm just

like running running and somebody gunned me the fuck down i think a real shitty like strategy for reserve is to wait inside the hermetic and camp the guys who click the button and come out because you know they're loaded that's why they're doing it i'm just gonna camp in there if i waste 30 minutes i waste 30 minutes but i'm gonna fucking do it i think the guy that killed me my first story where i was a few feet away or a few seconds away i was exfil camping and he just took my own it's a legit strategy i got a problem with it i really don't i've done it i've been killed by it it's fairly rare yeah it does it happens every 15th 20th games uh people do it i don't i haven't i've never set out to xville camp but i found myself in a position

to xville camp like oh there's people coming um but we've see there's a difference to me though between like all right let's head for xville wait a minute somebody's coming well hang on hide like that doesn't seem like xville camping to me it's like it's like oh we're in a situation where like there's a do we just leave and let him come out the door behind us like no let's there's three of us and one of him but what we have done is like me and larry and devin and all those guys like on um what's the map with the mall uh interchange on interchange we just set up as soon as the game starts we all lay down in bushes with thermal scopes and just wait at the X fill zone because there's only really two. And we just camp it for 45 fucking minutes. We camp it for 45 fucking minutes and kill everybody who comes.

Sure, that's shitty and scummy and maybe not what they want you to do. But I'm the one with your shit. But I'm the one with all your shit now. You know, it's a real cutthroat kind of game and it's at that point we've been playing so much like like you know we're mixing it up with some different kind of gameplay i uh douchebag gameplay yeah i i know the maps now i'm pretty good i spent a lot of time at the end of the last wipe upgrading me right because you can upgrade your character but that shit all is going to get wiped let's spend time on maps i don't know as well let's learn stashes hey where is zbo 114 on woods you know

like be able to find where's the marked room on woods or like people don't know these details but i spent the end of last wipe learning maps and and working on stuff i would get to keep till the next one yeah that's smart larry i i just checked i just clicked over to larry's discord he's not playing what i want to what's up with him maybe get on tonight yeah yeah i'm attending to get on the night i don't know if i want to play solos or with the team like it i think i want to get with a team and and start grinding out the um the quests yeah that's a good idea because you got to get access to the flea market the challenge is the run through so you might not know i it used to be to avoid a run through was 300 points

i think it's 600 now so you have to kill about two scavs and loot them to get through now if you're running with a team of five either they're graciously allowing you to get the scav kills because you're on YouTube or everybody like we find 10 scav kills and get them all and distribute them evenly. Like that's a lot to ask. What I read in the in the patch notes were 10 minutes or 600 points. And so I think I think we're all going to be solid as far as that goes. Because the punishment for a run-through is so severe now, you don't get to keep the things that you found that you put in your gamma if you get a run-through. Wrong.

That's what it said. They're just found not marked in raid. Which is essentially making them worthless. Well, you could sell them to traders. Yeah, which is essentially still making them worthless until they balance that all out. Because especially this early in the wipe when space is limited. We're getting a little nitty gritty here.

But still, it's a big punishment for, you know, getting a run through. Especially for things in your gamma. Let me do the last ad. Okay. Everyone hates talking to someone with bad breath. That humid, awful smell that keeps you from focusing on anything other than finding an excuse to leave. Now just think about all the times that you were the gross, smelly one and the other person was trying to find a way to get away. You probably can't think of any examples and that's because we rarely have an accurate read on our own bad breath odor. In other words,

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Once again, that's smartmouth.com slash pka for your free coupon. I think we all use it like twice a day. It really does. It's like a real thing. Yeah. If I don't use SmartMouth before I go to bed, like sometimes I'll just be really tired and I won't use it like twice a day it really does it's a real thing yeah if i don't use smart mouth before i go to bed like sometimes sometimes i'll just be really tired and i won't use it i'll just jump in bed and fall asleep my mouth is it's like a cat shit in my mouth when i wake up

i'm just like oh oh the worst the other day i um i up late. I didn't have time to do anything. I couldn't brush my teeth. I couldn't do smart mouth. All I had time for was like throw clothes on and rush out the door. And I had my mask on, you know, from getting the COVID. And every breath I could smell because I've got that mask on. So every time I exhale. You can smell it. And i'm smelling my and i'm

just like oh i hope this is protecting the people around me from my bad breath because this is rough gotta have your smart mouth it's it really is good stuff um you know listerine or something like that'll like cover up the smell but it's you know it's just like anything else you want to remove the smell they've improved mouthwash since the 1920s yes's you know it's just like anything else you want to remove the smell they've improved mouthwash since the 1920s yes yes they have there's no alcohol in there doesn't dry your mouth out they've even got a special formula for dry mouths it's good stuff grab yourself some so apparently john krasinski is getting hazed by the world have you followed this at all yeah nobody's allowed to make money wouldn't let that happen

for people that don't know here's the here's the take on it he made a podcast during the pandemic called some good news and he would have guests on and he fired up this thing and using this pre-existing popularity instantly was a big hit and people liked his podcast and uh it was a feel-good web series and you know make people aims to bring happier news to people during the current pandemic yeah all the news all the news was bad it was always virus this tsunami that whatever yeah and then his show was all about here are the here are the great things that are happening right now about jim from the office yeah yeah john krasinski and did you hear that so anyway he took that great news goodwill etc from the pandemic and he sold it to the highest bidder and now the show is moving behind a paywall who do they sell it to

it's not on this article that's hilarious was it cbs for him viacom cbs yeah you're right uh yeah and a show called some good news they couldn't have made just a blatant ripoff of that oh like maybe they wanted krasinski himself to be on it they're gonna want john john krasinski and and i'm sure that like i mean the man's got a team of people that they probably trademarked some good news right away you know you're right yeah so i i guess i'm 80 on the side of make a buck make a buck you know you the guy works in entertainment he created a podcast and then he made money off his podcast dude i did just just viacom sounds kind of familiar yeah viacom give me give us a call and uh you know we'll see what we can work out what a piece of shit um on the other hand ski right more on the other hand i also also, I don't know, something about the whole good news, happy-go-lucky, sell-out-in-six-weeks thing, like, strikes me as a little quick and a little, I don't know.

I guess maybe I just expect it to be a little more, not pro bono, but like, what's the opposite of benevolent? Because the whole thing was about good news and good vibes. And then it feels like you had a pretty hardcore profit. It's sold. It's about like, Oh, Jim from the office wants to talk about fun things.

And really it was like, Oh, he was parlaying into the mainstream media, uh, basically a pitch for now. I'm not, I'm not so sure that I'm going to buy in that, like from the hall,

all the way from the beginning that this was a moneymakingmaking scheme first of all the man's a multi-millionaire he's got a series on amazon that's very successful he's he's he's directing films he's he's he's starring in films good point most people usually just decide they've got enough money and don't want more i know somebody who did i too, but that's not the typical route. You don't do that, do you? Mr. McAfee, you silly bitch. I think Kyle was talking about me. Yeah, I was talking about Woody. Mr. McAfee would love to have his $94 million back.

That's why he's so fucking crazy. He didn't shout anything out. He shouted many things out. Okay, no business business interests nothing like that don't know follow me on twitter here no he did he was talking about homemade antibiotics bath salts and rum but those were the only things he was concerned with the whole time and then it went to a dark place with that dog talk he was like who nobody who owns a dog would kill a dog and i'm like well i mean i've killed a few who's the cast stone yeah you're living in a glass house with that yeah

uh but anyway yeah i'm i'm i see of both minds yeah the fact that he parlayed into behind a paywall so quickly. Here's the thing. The people who have a problem with it, they weren't watching the show anywhere. That's not what's always the case. It's always the case. That's what it always is. You're so right. That's what it always is. Like the people who like have been watching that show and like John and like his show,

they hear it's going to CBS and they're like, sweet. Now everybody will get to watch it. They won't have to just tune in to some little internet broadcast. The people who are having a problem, they weren't watching the show to begin with. They won't watch it now. They just don't like it that somebody's making some money somewhere. Yeah. There is probably a component.

I could have made a show about good stuff happening if I was a six foot three handsome movie star with one of the greatest sitcoms ever made. If I was also on The Office for ten years. Yeah. And you're right. You're right about that. It's mostly people bitching as per usual that don't even watch. But how are you entertained by a show that's only about good news? You know why the media always brings up shit that's bad news?

It bleeds it leads. Because that's, yeah, if it bleeds it leads that's what you want you don't want to talk about you know puppies being saved from a fire more than once every 45 minutes you know you like the season of the wire when they follow the newspaper that's coming ah well instead more great instead of the docs it's the newspaper what uh season is that five uh are they gonna ever go back to just be in cops the start of four might be what you want i'm old i i'm my my my memory is foggy and i'm only on like season one this time around okay schools also the political race the mayoral campaign right yeah yeah those go kind of hand in hand.

I wonder who runs for mayor. Is it that black police? Nobody you know yet. Nobody I know yet? And it's also several people. Somebody you know, but nobody you know yet from this show. That's not a spoiler. It's Littlefinger. Really?

Yeah. Does he still have trouble nailing an accent down in this show? He's got a pretty good balmore accent he's got a good baltimore accent okay balmore balmore i mean speaking people good accents do you know what jimmy mcnulty really sounds like is he british he's fucking british dude there's an episode where he does a british accent What? There's an episode where Jimmy McNulty, with his Baltimore accent, attempts a British accent to get into that underground whorehouse that's being financed by the Greeks,

and he's faking a British accent with a Baltimore accent. It's like accent inception, and he's masterful at it. It seems very difficult. It seems incredibly difficult. It's like accent inception, and he's masterful at it. It seems very difficult. It seems incredibly difficult. The guy from House, whenever I see him speak with a British accent, I'm like, what? Lou? Lowry.

Anyway, I think that guy's British. He is. As an American, I thought he was American. Part of me feels lied to. A lot of Australians are really good at nailing American accents, I've noticed. And vice versa. Is he Australian? Or British? He's British.

But I'm just saying in general. Lucy Lawless, I don't know. I'm pretty sure she's Australian and she nails an American accent. Keith Urban. Carl Urban. Both of them are so trump tweeted out something about mail-in ballots being ripe for abuse and that they were sending them to everyone in california even if they're not registered to vote and then twitter fact-checked it and uh

somehow the para proto community they hate fact-checking and. And somehow the Parabroto community, they hate fact-checking. But I guess the right, in general, always fusses. They feel like the fact-checkers are biased. What's your take on it? Is it okay to fact-check the president? I haven't followed the mail-in ballot thing. I don't know what the big to-do is. I don't know.

I genuinely don't know. Maybe there is fraud going on with it. Maybe not. I have no fucking idea. But yeah, they... I'll talk about it. You shouldn't be able to add editorial onto things. So like, isn't that the kind of thing where it's like social media sites have to agree that they're either purveyors or publishers of content?

There's some sort of line there. Maybe you can clarify for me more. Yeah. So here's the thing, right? AT&T is never held responsible for our phone conversation, right? Everyone agrees AT&T is not like a newspaper, a publisher, what have you.

That's us. All they do is provide the line. So sometimes sites like- But think about if they added commentary and removed supplemented stuff you said, then they would be- Let me get there. Yeah. But, you know, I know the opposite of the spectrum is something like a newspaper who creates all their content.

And somewhere in the middle, hard to get perfect are sites like Reddit or Twitter or Facebook, where, you know, like I'm the one doing the talking on facebook but somehow or buying an ad on facebook but somehow facebook is also held responsible for misinformation and in a way that we don't hold so they're in between a newspaper and a telephone line and they no one they they can't seem to do it in a way that everyone agrees is a good job so twitter twitter has a a policy that says if you try to mislead me about voting, like if you tell me that we're doing voting on Thursday this year, Twitter will fact check it now and say, no, no, no, no. You're trying to get Woody to miss the election by two days by telling him it's Thursday. It's actually Tuesday, right? So that's a thing.

That is a lot of power it's actually Tuesday. Right. So that's the thing. Trump went out. Yeah. That's you. That is a lot of power you're giving to someone who runs a company that basically controls the current method by which we communicate with each other. You know, like you can't be having companies like Facebook and Twitter jumping in and being, and, and in a lot of these, you know, they're going to be editorializing because people have their own opinions, their own thoughts. And so like, that's this is a this is a head down that's risky it is a slippery slope i

agree um but i picked that one because i thought it was on firm footing the whole like taylor november 5th thursday don't forget to vote when it's really november 3rd tuesday like that's an area where i thought we'd all agree like, oh, well, you know what? Like people doing campaigns of tricking, maybe targeting black people, for example, and giving them the wrong date. You push that out enough and people will miss the vote date. They'll get it wrong. Yeah. Like you, it's the whole, you give a mouse a cookie thing. Like you can't give these companies like Facebook, Twitter that have their own vested interests and alliances and relationships with people on Capitol Hill and whatnot. Like you can't give them that sort of carte blanche to editorialize and add and remove shit wherever they want.

That's that's risky. I don't know all the details and everything, but yeah, I'm definitely always in favor of more more free speech. OK, more, you know you know speech it's less fact checking really you know like they're not removing anybody's tweets it's not their place to fact check and if you don't think they'll be removing people's tweets before too long they will and they already do by suspending certain accounts and getting rid of people so like yeah i'm i'm very and it's not just twitter it's like all of these sites and these basically technocracy companies that control the way the, you know, the free square is now speaking. That's risky.

So the current event is this. Trump tweeted out. It's really breaks down the two things. One, I am OK with them when I'm not. He said mail in voting is really susceptible to fraud and thievery and trickery. He also said everyone's going to get a ballot even if they're not registered to vote. Now, the second part, in my mind, is clear-cut. Not to you, it would seem.

But in my mind, it's like, ooh, he's going to convince people they don't need to register to vote. I find that to be uncool, right? You shouldn't lie about the voting process and stuff. The part about mail-in voting being susceptible to fraud i actually i'm i'm on the same team there it makes sense that it would be right like a lot less security so here in north carolina that happened it happened in 2018 our last election house of representatives right not some little bullshit you know like school district assistant federal representative house of congress Congress. The Republicans did it, but it could have been either side. It could be either side. They took thousands of ballots from

one county and threw them away. And because of that, they declared the election to be invalid when really the Democrats should have won like it you know you can statistically predict how the absentee ballots place would come out based on all the other ones but uh it's like the republicans won absentee ballots by 92 that's weird but if you were to guess they were like all the other votes then the democrats would have won and uh so that election became invalid they held like a midterm 2019 or something and the republicans won that and it's like huh it worked it worked now it kind of did work in that people are in jail now because of it like it's not a conspiracy theory worked that well though yeah like they found out who where the money went who the actors were and the people who did the physical part and

were behind it or in prison so my big thing is i think it's really short-sighted and foolish to give companies like facebook twitter instagram youtube reddit who are google who are if if it's 2020 and you haven't figured out how incestuous these companies are with people on capitol hill and with these politicians and whatnot like come, come on, get with it. Like these people have vested interests in certain things. And if you don't think they're going to use every bit of power they have to get that, and whether it means manipulating information or cutting things off or stifling people, shadow banning, whatever, it's just it's bad news.

It's bad news. I don't know enough about the voting thing to really weigh in. I don't know how fraudulent mail-in voting is. But yeah, it's not a good idea to give those companies this power. It can be. So on the voting thing, to shift into the topic, I'm of two minds.

On one hand, I feel like the Republicans always work to have lower voter turnout. They want to shorten the amount of time that you can vote. If the Democrats were in charge, you'd get a whole fucking voting month. Oh, definitely. Republicans want to slow it down and Democrats want to shorten the amount of time that you can vote like if the democrats were in charge you get a whole fucking voting oh definitely like republicans slow it down and democrats want to do like hey you don't even need id you get anyone can vote just walk on in even if you're not technically a citizen let me keep going so yeah so the democrats are always

like more votes are better because they do better under big turnout and the republicans are always you know tightening it down usually under the guise of fraud. But there really isn't any fraud. Trump came in, said they're going to get, they found like actually zero fraud. You said there was fraud, though. On the mail-in voting thing. Okay, so that's fair. Touche.

But I guess I was talking about people who weren't supposed to vote, not stolen votes. But anyway. Oh, so that's the thing now democrats want to make voting easier by doing this mail-in thing but i don't know that i agree with the democrats on this one because is the rationale fraud a corona thing yes where it's like okay but i don't know that okay well topically to me now here's conspiracy woody saying you're using corona to get something you've always wanted oh of course yeah yeah yeah so uh anyway i don't know i find it really fascinating i like to watch the chess of it now now the

democrats are using corona to make voting more convenient which is always in the democrats favor and the republicans, in this case, I think legitimately challenging the potential fraud. And that's where it is. You know, it's... So I thought, I don't know. I wanted to hear your take on it because I expected you to be on the other side of it

where you'd say Twitter, Facebook, all the Googles, they shouldn't be fact checking they shouldn't be inserting their two cents i firmly stand by that like you cannot allow these giant tech companies to be the arbiter of speech that's really fucking risky especially when what if the person who decides to fact check decides that's a little lie but i like that lie that's a good lie that helps what i want then if people don't think that's going to happen you're a fucking retard like obviously that will happen you're kind of winning me over these powers can have precedence right so sometimes i think like all right let's say let's say you love trump right and now you grant trump this power trump can

decide who's allowed to leave their front door or not. Right. With this Corona thing. It's incredibly Trump's power beginning to end. That might be cool. But remember, someday you'll hate your president. Someday it's going to be the equivalent of Hillary, not actually Hillary, but work with me. And you'll regret that you gave that power to the president when you liked him. that you gave that power to the president when you liked him. Exactly. And that's where I am. Even if right now I don't feel like Twitter and Google have bad intent,

you want to give them that power, right? Because someday they will. Basically, the way I would put it, do you ever want to say something to the left of Nancy Pelosi or to the right of Marco Rubio? If no, then awesome. Have these companies control speech. Have them control it because you're going to be sandwiched

between a couple of milk toast opinions that you're allowed to have and that'll be it. Right. And it's going to happen either slowly or very quickly. Who knows? But it's going to happen.

Jack Dorsey, that's the guy's name in charge of Twitter right now, right? Yeah. Yeah. Not you, but the listener might politically agree with Dorsey and think that it's okay to give him that power. But just wait. Someday there'll be a different guy with that job or something other than Twitter who's able to leverage this precedent.

And you'll be unhappy that now they're the arbiter of truth. I'm not very sensitive to any kind of what feels like encroachment or manipulation of our ability to speak freely and you have to look at the internet as the online public square that's what it is now that's where especially with shit like corona if you can't speak your mind on the internet talking about politics what have you like where where can you speak it's very news i don't have an answer because i what i want is for everyone to know the truth and then debate on how to make our real reality better. What I don't want is for everyone to get bamboozled by bad actors. And then we don't even deal with the same reality that we're trying to improve. The problem is I don't know how to get truth out there.

And you're winning me over that having twitter and facebook do it for us is probably a bad plan yeah yeah well i'm glad to hear that yeah it seems like a terrible idea to me these boards are constantly changing the investors are constantly changing and they're very influential people who are part of you know i just need a good plan i don't think it's having the government regulate it that's a scary plan and then you say oh the free market will will decide who says i used to be more on that team and over time it was like oh wait this doesn't fucking work at all because companies like facebook twitter youtube instagram google are no longer that incentivized by profit margins because they know there's no one who's coming

on their tails bing you think bing is scaring Google? You think DuckDuckGo is scaring Google or YouTube? Of course not. I only use Ask Jeeves. Well, it was Ask before it died, I think, right? AskDuckDuckGo. It was. I like when it was Ask Jeeves and it had that old-timey butler.

That was the best part of Ask Jeeves, is thinking about like, oh, this guy's going to answer about my potentially chlamydia i have but in a classy way yeah you know when i'm googling symptoms and things so i i did like that about ass jeeves google doesn't give you any any flair anymore all they'll do is like have a celebratory google doodle about someone who died in 1802 and basically did nothing it's like hey this guy fucking he invented artificial banana flavoring how's that i never use the google home page anymore it used to be

the google home page was kind of celebrated for how simple it was now i use my url bar and i have for so long i don't even see the doodles yeah yeah i don't really follow either oh saint paul is trending are there more riots more riots in the twin cities yes apparently yes my goodness i who who loots a vitamin store you know i always find the targets like can we just agree the targets don't make sense they're targeting whatever's convenient they're not trying to make a statement by taking out autozone of course not like that's the way it is but like i do it's like and you just know the employee of

the vitamin shop shoppe the day before this was like no one's gonna come here now they're getting all their fucking b vitamins and fish oil stolen i uh oh in ferguson i think it was ferguson they burnt down a wig and hairdresser shop maybe that sort of specialized for black women and everyone was like why would you take out that store that's like i just your people does that sound racist i don't know how to not to sound it but they look you're that's your own community you're taking out the owners were were black women like like you know they took out the black you wig they took out the black wig hairdresser place like why why why and it's because they're not a thinking mob

you know they're just uh impulsive wrecking stuff nearby angry at the world mob not really they it wasn't i remember i i think i even told this on the show when the ferguson thing was going down very good friend of mine carter i know you listen to the show Carter shout out he was like I'm working he was texting me at the time he's like I work at Ferguson and this whole thing is getting out of hand he went to work the next day and he

was like I came to work in my insurance agency whatever the fuck it was and I was expecting pretty much everybody to be there I was the only one i showed up at a door that i had to call my boss and that i could unlock with the passcode or whatever and you know what there is to eat in ferguson near me mcdonald's and you know what happened to that mcdonald's they burned it down and so i have nothing to eat here and then he literally

quit that job right after ferguson and moved to chicago because he was like this sucks oh well at least you got away from those people nonsense in ferguson but yeah yeah i don't know i'm out of here i'm going to atlanta i'm amused that st louis is like, really? Not here? Usually it's, we usually get something. Are we just going to sit through this whole thing and not participate? It's going to happen. It's going to, we were A plus better business bureau rated for rioting. St. Louis will pop off at some point and it'll probably be the east side that does it first we

watched that clip of New Year's in East St. Louis where it was just firing high-powered rifles into the air with no concern there's like cops driving by at some point even the cops know like this is like just to keep on fucking rolling I yeah I remember we watched that and i i learned about shooting guns into the air like so my i was wrong i thought shooting up straight was okay and shooting a gun almost straight up was almost as good it turns out that you have to really shoot straight up otherwise it lands hard and fast if you shoot straight up it doesn't land hard no right it's kind of like just dropping it off your route because there's no difference between shooting one a bullet straight up and dropping it from very high oh yeah but that makes that makes a ton of sense so let's say 90 degrees

is straight up i thought 80 was pretty good it is not 80 is shooting someone who's far. That's what 80 is. It lands and zoom. These gentlemen were not being careful about the angle. Yes, that's where I was headed. They were just randomly shooting towards the sky. I promise you, they were actually shooting things far away not dropping this uh i was doing this is probably a couple weeks ago at this point but uh taylor murka on twitch we were doing a just

chatting hanging out watching stuff stream and it was like deep it was some guy named uh guns and something else and he like goes and experiments and not experiments, but he experiences other ways of life, like in Russia, rural areas. And he basically went into this shithole area that looked like a paintball course. And everybody in the chat is like, oh, this is the grossest thing ever. This is awful. And I was like, oh, it's not nearly as bad as East St. Louis. And so I pulled up a video of that, and they're like, oh, my God, this is in America? Our country? And it looks like this my God, this is in America. Our

country and it looks like this. Yeah, it's just awful. It's sad what's happened to so many cities that were booming 60, 70 years ago when you think about it. Like Detroit, Paris of the West they used to call it. Really?

Literally look up Paris of the West and you will see it's Detroit. When did they call it? I'm not going to do that. That's a see it's destroyed I'm not gonna do that That's a trap Taylor I'm not googling fucking shit When did they call it the Paris of the West What year was that It was the year There's no way to know Kyle

There's no way to know I'm willing to wait I think it begins with the I like that Taylor's our fact checker now If I had to guess it would be like 1946 or something When they were booming with the automobile stuff I'm gonna go with

Covered wagons When they made a lot of horse glue How did I get started fact checking now? Woody seamlessly passes that oh yeah how did i get to the fact checking now the show needs it but they give it to us thank you anyway um yeah does st louis have a lot of just like empty grass lots where there were vacant houses do they knock it down and uh east st louis does st louis proper not as much but yeah on the illinois side lots of lots that haven't been mowed and you know as kyle's age they show very long grass yeah it apparently if you have an empty house that quickly becomes a drug den or a place where homeless people squat or like you know it's a's a real magnet for unattractive behavior.

But if you have an empty lot, then that's preferable. Yeah. So I got this house in East St. Louis. You better snatch this up, Taylor. Zillow. $12,000. Taylor, I'll go in

halvesies with you. Do you know what area this is? The fact that it's a $12,000 home, Taylor, I can only imagine if you open up the link, you can see Martin Luther King Drive

from the map. Not to mention you're right by fucking North 16th and Missouriouri ave yeah this is an investment taylor one it comes with a satellite dish i mean pretty cool place you know what that would be pretty far already mounted let's buy a house together for six grand a pop and see what we can turn it into in the closing cost in detroit it's built in 1900 that has to be a mistake uh in detroit they don't let you buy houses like this like a lot of people were just buying homes they had no intention of doing anything with hoping that detroit would turn around and now

they like you have to prove that you want to live there and turn it into a home looking at these pictures i can smell this house absolutely rancid you know what this smells it has a damp smell you know it does it's like black look at the payment look at the estimated payment 73 a month this house price per square foot this house is a notable upgrade from where my father was raised he would have he had it was about this size and like what it hit me when kyle said he can smell it this is this is yeah i can smell it i can smell the front yard i can smell the grass like i i know the neighborhood i bet i i can hear the bar across the street and um but his house wasn his house didn't have a yard like this. It was all of them touching each other.

Dude, this one's much better for $12,000. Little benefits of East St. Louis. They have some of the country's most renowned full nudity strip clubs. Full nudity? Do they serve alcohol? Oh, they do. They serve alcohol. That's the lowest standard

like there's titty bars and they tend to serve alcohol there's full nudity bars but they don't have alcohol st louis has combined the two st louis well because i'm fucking weird the two major cities in missouri are in three states collectively where it's St. Louis, Missouri, St. Louis,

Illinois, and then Kansas city, Missouri, and then a little bit of Kansas city, Kansas. But you want, you want pot. Now drive over the bridge,

go to Illinois. You want drive through liquor, guns and ammunition, drive on over to the Missouri side. We got you covered. And so a nice you know this is what multiculturalism means to be you know drive through or no it's not it's drive through liquor guns and fireworks is what it is missouri has a good combination

is it like a barn that you literally drive through the middle of the store or is it like a drive-thru window like a fast food restaurant? Drive-thru window. You go on the side that looks like a barn, and then you say, I want two boxes of 22, a handle of pop-off vodka, and a bunch of M80s. They're like, you know, M80s are illegal, right? And it's like, give me the M80. Here's your sparklers.

here's your sparklers in Kentucky they have the drive through liquor stores where you drive right through the middle of that motherfucker that's cool but they hand you the alcohol right yeah I mean you can get out but you don't need to

Woody what are you doing you gotta start drinking with all those rules around you. Take advantage. Yeah, you're right, Kyle. This second one is much, much better, but it's still awful. It's still awful. It's a $12,000 home. How many months do you think you and I could pay $36.50 each

before we're killed. Are you seriously talking about financing this motherfucker? Oh, you're right. Yeah, we wouldn't need to do that. I'm not getting a mortgage on a $12,000

house. How do you finance a $12,000? I wouldn't make money. And it's six it's six finance a twelve thousand i have six thousand dollars not to brag you know i don't need to toot my own horn but i also have i'm i'm well over six grand liquid so i can all right well i mean i mean, I need to move a few things around. I mean, if I get an extension on my taxes. Yeah, man, this house is ugly as shit, dude.

Looks awful. Yeah, it is. Now, if there was a $12,000 house like that in Colorado, then you'd chip in. You'd have to tear this up and just destroy it. You would. Look at how much mold there is on these walls. It's visible.

Bloody darn. Yeah. I think that's moss. It might be moss. Oh, look at the outside. Oh, God. Someone chopped a tree down and just left it. Is it in St. Louis? It might have just fallen down on the fence and he hasn't gotten left it. In St. Louis?

They might have just fallen down on the fence and he hasn't gotten to it. You're being kind of judgy. A little deep cut there. So I'm looking at like Colorado. I searched the entire state of Colorado and I made my maximum price $12,000. It's just plots of land. But several acres. You can get five acres in Blanco, Colorado, $4,000.

For $8,000 or $4,000? Four big ones. I'm out. Five acres. I can't handle four big ones. I mean, we could all chip in here, have ourselves a piece of land out in the Sunshine State. Florida?

No, Colorado. It's a Dumb and Dumber joke. Oh, I'm like... Lloyd, Jim Carrey's character, is picking up Jamie Presley or whatever her name is, and he's like, where are you heading? She's like, Colorado. He's like, ah, the Sunshine State.

And she's just like, ah. I love that movie. But yeah. I don't know if we want to go here. I was looking up the violent crime rate again. East St. Louis is blowing Guatemala and Nicaragua over here. East St. Louis is blowing Guatemala and Nicaragua over here. You got to go to Caracas, Venezuela before you get anything even close.

Property crime? Oh, my God. We're going to lose our cars night one. I didn't think of the cars. Yeah, definitely the cars. I was thinking of the home. Nobody's going to fuck with that place. Clearly they already have. They're not coming back. You can't steal property, Taylor.

It goes all the way to the middle of the earth. You goof. You can't steal property. You can't steal property. It doesn't belong to anyone. Yeah, that's what you think, bitch. We showed you. It does belong to us now stupid and native americans i like how you made the stupid comment politically correct stupid sat native americans

i'm a native i hate that i we call them native americans i'm a native I hate that we call them native Americans I'm a native American we literally are native Americans we were born in America and we grew up here yes that's how I got my first five jobs you and Elizabeth Warren sir your name's Taylor

we're not buying this my name is Chief Getting Job. Oh, man. Oh, speaking of the Native American accent, I've been playing Red Dead Redemption 2 on stream. i've probably played for like 10 11 12 hours total now this game is awesome i told you it is so fun pretending to be a cowboy it's really in depth and there's so much to do that it's kind of did it open too slow i've heard

that criticism it did open really slow uh but i interact with my chat so much and like i'm joking around with them it goes so fast like it didn't bother me but yeah this game is sick so much fun and it it's so in-depth it's almost bothersome where it's like i'll be trying to chase someone in the chats like you gotta feed your horse it's like are you fucking kidding me it's nice when your chat's helpful and like you said uh sometimes down moments in games are a good time to talk to the chat so like what might be boring gameplay can be a better show exactly where is it yeah and so i don't mind that at all if the game requires your full attention then the chat's not getting any of it yeah that doom was harder because of that because so many scenes in doom it's like are you ready bitch here's hard rock and death and

it's like i would realize i'm playing it and it's like i haven't talked in four minutes i'm just stressed i'm just anxious about you know chainsawing enough guys it's a great fucking game it's a very cool beat it no no i got maybe a third of the way through the the final boss is kind of lame but everything up until that is great i'll need to check that out so you played red dead 2 uh i know a lot about it i've watched videos of it i've watched people stream it uh it's made by rockstar i believe so it had you know they sort of borrow a lot from um from the gta series with the how in-depth it is and all that shit i've watched a lot of videos but i'm early in that game because i was thinking rockstar it's like gta and i just finished gta 5 where i can kill hundreds of

cops and people and then pay like 65 and be fine yeah i had no idea that behaving like an asshole in the beginning of this game there are law dogs waiting for me at every corner in the woods and they are way better with their guns than i am yep and so i'm getting very aggravated like i'll be in the middle of any mission and then you hop on a bridge and suddenly there's you know 15 sheriffs on the other side just butt fucking you so i need to i need to save up enough to pay off my bounty in the main area, which is $300, which in this game might as well be 1.5 in grand theft auto. That's how Skyrim,

that's how Skyrim could be. You know, you'd, uh, you'd go on a little rampage and then they'd arrest you. And then you're like, ah, you could pay this much money.

It'd be incredible. Some, or you go to jail and then you get, I don't know if you, I don't know if you ever played it, but like you go to jail and then you get i don't know if you i don't know if you ever played it but like you go to jail yeah oh you have that one opportunity to pick the lock you have one lock pick i guess you but hold in and if you break that if you break that then you literally have to watch the days pass for like dozens and dozens of days sometimes depending on how bad of a boy you were yeah but you can also just like get up and

pee not that big a deal in skyrim at least i haven't been taken to jail yet in red dead redemption 2 or no i have been but it didn't work that way i didn't have to wait that long so i saw an ad for um an elder scrolls online game i don't know what that is, though. Is there going to be a full story? Oh, that's been out for a while. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I guess maybe it's an expansion for it or something because it was like a...

I skip almost every YouTube ad, but I was watching YouTube on my television and it was like a three and a half, four minute ad, but it looked cool as shit. So I just watched the whole thing and it's like a bunch of like, you know, a guy with a big Viking helmet and some enormous blonde bitch and like eight other like just regular sword and shield guys like rappel down into this vampire cave and discover this like hidden city, fight a shitload of werewolves.

And then they face off against like a vampire lord. That sounds tight. Yeah, it looked awesome. It looked like a lord of the rings type scenario and it looked great and i'm watching i'm like please be this like a whole new elder skyrim 2 or whatever the fuck you know another elder but it said elder scrolls online or something like that i don't even know what the deal is with that like i tried elder scrolls online it's been out for a few or maybe i'm mistaking it for something else but i i definitely tried that

at some point and i lost interest almost immediately like with a game like skyrim or gta or red dead redemption 2 like i want to be the guy in that universe everybody else is an npc i'm the maniac doing my thing i don't want a bunch of other maniacs doing their thing that's not fun so they were trying to do this thing um and there's there was a subreddit for it called Skyrim Together, where they were trying to code Skyrim for co-op. And I think it turned into a money laundering scheme or something, where they took tons and tons of money from the public. Because everybody was like, yeah, that sounds incredible.

And these guys who were developing it just kept all the money and maybe just never even did it. So I don't know. But that would be cool, just co-op. Just like co-op Skyrim or co-op Fallout. But I've been told Fallout 76 has been improved a lot. Have you ever played a Fallout game? I played a little bit of Fallout New Vegas,

and it didn't suck me in. I didn't get very interested. Man, that's my favorite, probably my favorite game series. Definitely my favorite RPG. I played all of all of oblivion all of skyrim um i played fable and i played a bunch of other shit i love fallout i love the like the the backstory of that whole mythos you know the the vault tech company and and everything they were up to all that sneaky shit and i love the gameplay in new vegas it's miles ahead of the gameplay of fallout 3 where they added like the first person shooter aiming and

stuff and i like the perk system i like the whole doesn't hold up sometimes great games from 12 years ago you replay them and you're like i played it about two years ago and i modded the fuck out of it and it was a a ball. It was so fun. Uh, I really loved it. Uh, it was around the time fallout four came out. Um, so maybe a little more than two years,

you know, time flies. But, uh, I, I, I played fallout four, like vanilla.

Then I played fallout four all the way through, like modded to hell and back with like, I, I think I've still got maybe the screenshots of my, my character somewhere with giant titties. you know a game i you know i've been wanting to pal around with a little bit that i never have is the um the bioshock series everybody says those are awesome and i've never played any and so okay well shit dude that's a whole story. Like, like if you're going to get into that, like don't even watch any videos.

First of all, it's great. It's a really good story. It's a really good, um, like universe to be in with like, like it's sort of an alternate universe type thing. Uh,

you're in an undersea city that you discover. I'll kind of leave it at that. And, uh, there's three of them and they're great. They're legitimately amazing games. Yeah. Third one in the sky.

I think third one sucks. People said it's good. I haven't played the third one. It got, I think Kyle's in the minority opinion. So start with one. Basically. I don't think I am.

The third one's awful. No. Did you like it, Woody? I bought it and didn't play it the third one's awful so the first the first two are like really well linked and uh you know they're under the sea in the city of rapture and then the third one just goes off the rails with all this like alternate reality timeline uh time travel bullshit and it was promote it was a

completely different game than what was promoted they they really promoted this like oh you'd be flying on hooks in the sky all the time and doing all this crazy shit and it's like no that's just kind of like the cut scene mechanic just for the record it got 10 out of 10 on Steam, four and a half out of five on GameStop, and on Google, 95% like ratio. I believe they pay for those ratings. All I know is it is the worst of the Fallout games. Everyone loved it. What did Game Informer give it?

10 out of a 10. I think they pay for those ratings. When it dropped, I think oh what i think i was like neck deep in the in my minecraft world and that's why i didn't play it but i was very excited about it and just what i remember is like everyone playing it everyone in like my universe was loving that game and i don't know i feel like i found a lot of data to back up that opinion. I played it. Not a good,

not the worst of them for sure. I'm not saying it was a terrible game, but it fell short of the first two big time. Like, like it, like halo one, two, and three are all excellent. Each one is better than the last,

um, gears, gears, one, two, and three. Excellent. Story is great.

You feel for the characters. They got better every step of the way. I'm aware with Halo and Gears they kept making it. Is that a very hard campaign as far as campaigns go? Gears? Yeah, Gears. If you play it on hard... Well, any of those games you play on the hardest difficulty is quite hard.

Gears is a little more challenging because there's a... I'm thinking of Dark Souls. Dark Souls is the one people are like, Dark Souls is a very difficult game that I don't fuck with. Yeah, it looks too difficult to enjoy. Apparently when you die in it, you lose so much progress that it's like a brutal experience.

Yeah. I don't want that. I like dying and starting two seconds before I died. I don't mind a little bit of punishment. Have you considered the Lego games, Taylor? Because they do this. I was doing Red Dead Redemption, and I accidentally parked my...

Your wagon On the railroad And I was chasing someone Way far away Who parks on the train tracks Taylor And I logged it and everybody was like get back Get back there and I was like It's fine it's a game And then I see them

And I'm like oh oh Oh And then I ended up dying because they killed my horses because i left them on the train track uh i deserve that one but they only teleported me back like two minutes of game time not too bad if they would have teleported me back 20 minutes or something if i wasn't streaming the game that would be enough for me to be like fuck it no no i'm not replaying 20 30 minutes of gameplay to get back to that yeah so i i prefer they keep you real close to what you're supposed to be doing so i guess dark souls the gameplay is

really tough and the death is really brutal and i think wings of redemption is good at it yeah yeah i wouldn't doubt he is i mean that that's one of those games where like you you get timing down right where it's like this is where i step out here so i can shoot this one guy with a bow and then i step back and i know that because i've died 10 times here and then you step out again then you pop dodge again like that's my impression of it yeah yeah and you know and all right i just need to hit him 37 times before he hits me twice. Yeah, I've never played it.

I've watched a little bit of it, and it does look difficult. I've seen the speed run, the world record speed run, and that's just absurd. It's like, what are you doing with your life? It's like they're not even playing the same game. No, you're not. He beat a game that takes people a dozen hours and five minutes or something. He's jumping over maps and through the sky and finding all these weird glitches to like get through the i'm exaggerating with five minutes but it was quick it was like a 20th of what it should have taken him or something it was crazy fast i like to watch portal speed runs now the first portal

in particular i've i like that game and i've played through it. Call it 25 times. Like, like I know that game really well and I watched them speed run it. And I'm like, that's not even the solution the makers had in mind. You know, like you can see there while you're falling and they put a portal in some weird spot and skip the whole puzzle.

That's what they, it's all about like skipping puzzles and doing weird things and yeah i i played through that not too long ago uh me and uh my friend class beat uh i guess it was portal 2 because it's the co-op it's the co-op one yeah yeah yeah they get all tedious at the end by the end i was just like you want to do this one you want to do this puzzle i'll just sit here and you do the thing and and then I'll jump in. It was getting old. I did it with Chiz, actually, on a live stream.

It was a good experience. Chiz is smart, good at puzzles. We did it together. People rave about that game being incredible. It's really fun. I'd played it before. I was just bored by the end. We beat it in one session.

I don't remember being able to let one person leave. I felt like the nature of the puzzles was that you had to do something while I was doing this and it took two people to solve it. There are some puzzles though that one guy needs to go out there and wait until he sets up a whole thing

and then he pushes a cube through it and then the cube is going to come back to me and I'm just going to sit it on a lever. My whole thing is picking a cube up and putting he pushes a cube through it and then the cube's going to come back to me and I'm just going to sit it on a lever. Like my whole thing is picking a cube up and putting it on a switch and the other guy's the one who has to bounce around and do nonsense. I cannot play a puzzle game

like that on stream. I have my chat calling me a retard enough already. Yeah. I'm not dealing with puzzle games. No thanks. The first time i ever streamed portal it was so that i would get the opposite experience like all right i'm gonna try this portal game that i played 18 times let's see how i do

that's what i should do play portal by myself for hours every day my gut instinct is to fire one here to one puzzle i don't know and i'm like and that's all for tonight yeah i like portal it's a good time i think twitch has really helped me rediscover enjoying games like i just haven't been a big gamer for so long and like really i guess i can give a bunch of credit of that to grand theft auto 5 that is the most fun i've had playing a game and as far as i can remember my twitch they help me and sometimes in ways that i i just find myself incredibly grateful for like you know like they haven't been good at this lately but i'm like all right you know sand 203 east wing is that key worth a lot you know and they can look it up for me and

tell me or you know or i'll be like i i think i heard footsteps do you think you heard footsteps and they're like yeah that was metal there's a piece of metal under the door sill underneath you to your right and it's like thanks you thanks. We're working on it. It's a team. For every one person in there giving me good advice, I have a dozen with nothing but misinformation. Telling me the wrong things to do.

Did I hear someone? No? They'll all get on board. Where I'll be like, so am I supposed to kill the conductor of the train? Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Oh. All right. Bang! to kill the the conductor of the train yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes oh all right wasted waste it's like i'm i make up taylor i guess i wish we were shooting the same time you finished first and you raided me cool yeah and then i did this long conspiracy theory about how the st louis blues cheated and didn't actually win the cup honestly?

Enjoy your final raid, friend. You're like, I know he's kidding, but this is getting me irrationally upset. Was it? Or just a goof? I was more joking with the chat because they'll call me a retard. They make fun of me like nobody's business this is like a week ago or so i was doing like a just chatting watching like intervention or 90 day fiance funny stuff my 600 pound life with dr now that indian guy who does not play any shit dr now you know chis if we can get dr now on the podcast i'd fucking love it he would really whip my ass into shape but like they'll, they will give such bad information so often to me that it will make it

difficult to gain sometimes. But basically they were, we were watching all that stuff and fuck, I just lost my train of thought. We were watching. It was, it started with the Stanley cup thing. You rated me.

That's what it was. And like, they'll say, Oh, you're a fat headed retard. You're a moron. You suck at this game. And it's like,

who cares? Whatever. And then one guy started posting like wrong stats in the NHL playoffs and about the Blues. And I had to keep pausing and be like, no, that's not even the right stat line. It's fucking bullshit, dude. And you know it's bullshit. And then that unleashed a torrent where everybody's like, we got him, boys. We got him.

Those wrong hockey stats in chat to trigger tail and it did it embarrassingly it triggered me pretty good i'm like go back to calling me a dumb fat retard please stop posting the hockey stat oh mine was unrelated to that i asked for conspiracy theory ideas because we're going to do another one someday sometime i guess and uh your helen keller one was so good we brainstormed and they were like dude do the st louis blues cheated their way to the cup and yeah it was just a joy and i did the whole thing with like trumpy and like people are saying that you know they were the worst by the all-star break and then best at the spring is that even possible same players smart people saying that yeah i've never watched the sport i don't i don't

lots of good people that's just my people saying the blues never won yeah it was all it was filled with i heard and people are saying and yeah that's what you need unsourced i heard and people are saying are two of the best phrases for conspiracy that did get to me i was not not your comment but yeah they they'd been your chat got you yeah they got me with the blues stuff i'm surprised you don't like the uh the total war warhammer stuff more with all the like lore and backstory that shit has i love it it's just that like i'm trying to play more games that i can talk to the chat more and so like uh gta red dead redemption 2 games like that are very very much pointed towards that where you know i can that I can talk to the chat more. And so like GTA, Red Dead Redemption 2, games like that are very, very much pointed towards that

where I can look away from my horse for a second. Oh, that's a good suggestion. That's funny. Nice joke. Thanks for the sub. Whereas like I know the way that I play Total War Warhammer and I would be mute for minutes at a time. You can talk between games but like i mean

it's sometimes the the reason someone wins is their clicks per minute and and you have to be just so so focused and you're microing 12 15 different units and three or four of them have between three and five abilities yeah It's a lot to do. There's lots of different control groups, and it's a big fucking map. You're doing a lot of stuff. It's taxing. There's no time to do anything.

Most of the time, I don't have enough time just to do what I'm supposed to be doing, much less talk to anybody or look anywhere else other than the screen. More often than not? What? Are you still winning more often than not when you play online? Yeah. Oh, yeah, for sure.

Yeah. Nice. Have you hammered down a main faction you're playing with? I play three or five different ones. I'm pretty good with everybody. I'm probably best with Lizardmen or Dark Elves. They're both pretty easy to play. men yeah dark elves um they're they're they're both pretty easy to play uh but recently the um the green skins got a huge buff with the new dlc so the green skins are probably

i don't know about the meta but they're top tier for sure they're top three i'd say green is it always up what are the green green men are like the orcs uh like orcs and goblins goblins yep one of the the the new uh the new the new chieftain or general, I can't, lord, that they added to the game is called Grom the Punch. And he's so fat that he can't walk on foot. Usually you have mount options. So you can, for like 1,000 gold, you get this knight who has a magical sword, let's just say

well for two thousand you can put him on a badass horse and for three thousand he'll ride a dragon but with this new guy it's like no no no the only option is to wheel this guy around in a big wheelbarrow pulled by a bunch of hogs and and you see that little that little spire that sticks up next to him that looks like there's a flag on it that's actually a tiny baby night goblin who feeds him snacks while he rides around killing people and it's cool how do you fight what what's the what is his fighting style well he's on a chariot so he's just ramming into people with like spikes on the wheels and i think he's got a big battle axe in one hand and the little critter is like feeding him these big hunks of meat like continuously and he's just always eating as this little guy goes

and like tosses him a big like uh like chicken leg or something like that it's great it's hilarious i need a new gaming pc taylor do you have you thought about getting a new gaming PC? I know yours is also not cutting edge, right? Or maybe it is. It's not cutting edge. I was talking to a friend recently being like, hey, I should probably upgrade my 2060 to a 2080 or whatever it is, graphics card. And then he was like, no, for what you're playing,

this is going to do just fine. I don't listen to that loser. What you need is one of these. What is that? Oh, 1080 Ti? Yeah. he has a 2060 though i don't know which is better but 2060 is probably parallel at least oh yeah 2060 versus 1080 ti i don't know right me neither what's the new one coming out so the 1080 ti is the current new one the 3080 will be the next new one that I'd really like to have. But I guess if you go by past trends, it would come out pretty soon,

this spring or this summer, I think. But with Corona and COVID, you might expect it to be delayed. You might expect it to be manufacturing delays. And now it's like, well, if you told me, Woody, you have to wait till Christmas, I'd say, all right, well, that's too long. I'm not waiting that long. If you said, oh, it might come in June or July, I would wait that long. And I don't know what the answer is going to be because it's not a normal year. This is still much better.

The 1080 Ti is better than 2060. Yeah. Okay. I bet. I didn't expect Yeah. Okay. Quite a bit. I didn't expect that. Okay. Well, I guess I'll have to upgrade once that new one's available.

That might be the way to go. Yeah, I mean, it'll be $1,000. Yeah, I mean, whatever. Yeah. But, you know, games will run fucking good. I think there's a 2080 Super. I don't know what the deal is with that. I haven't looked into it. I'm so happy with my current system, this 2080 Ti,

that I'm not in the market for anything. There is a 2080 Super. And like you, I only do research when I'm about to pull the trigger. And I'm not 100% sure Ti or Super is better. Someone out there knows and thinks we're dumb. I think super's i think super's better but probably not better enough to justify me spending another 1200 or whatever it costs and then having this 2080 ti just sitting here i'm going to sell it

on ebay and deal with shipping there's no way to check impossible so uh but but yeah i google this one i'm really happy with my really happy with my setup right now. This thing runs so smoothly. It has no issues. Every game just about is maxed. I'm playing 1440. What's the curved monitor you have? I gave that and my last PC,

which has a regular 1080, not a 1080 Ti, to her because her gaming PC had broken down so she's saying who hers who's her is a kitty oh yeah i didn't keep up so so she's got the uh like the 3440 by 40 whatever it is that that big um you got it right 3440 by 1440p yeah and she's got that that monitor and uh like two more monitors hooked up to um a pretty nice 1080 system i don't know it was cutting edge when i bought it huh yeah i need a new pc i like it's terrible timing now the new cpus just dropped so i could

get them knowing full well i'll need a new gpu and I'll still be okay. That might be where I land Yeah, I could use a CPU upgrade. I think Tarkov is rather CPU dependent And it's getting me they made some CPU upgrades in the wipe that just happened this morning They did get a little more efficient, which we'll see how much that helps. I've only played two or three games It I was telling you I think maybe before the show, I felt like I was getting a lot of frames. I need to turn on the frame counter to see what I'm actually getting. But Reserve felt super smooth and it looked great.

Cool, cool. Yeah. So, do I have anything else on my agenda? I don't know. Oh, have you finished off Clone wars because you know they finally did the last season for disney plus i uh i watched it i felt like they pissed around it's like all right this is your final season hmm let's focus on anakin right like like okay maybe two Osaka episodes or whatever her name is. Four! Four Osaka episodes! Jesus!

Oh, there's Anakin! Oh, and he's gone. Okay, that was 30 seconds of Anakin and 45 minutes of Osaka. It was literally that. And I was just like, ah, come on. It's like she's getting involved with these other characters you don't care about. Before you knew it, it was over. And then there was like a clone

troop episode that went on for like, you know, it won't just be one episode, one off. It'll be like three episode stories or four episode stories that like tell the same thing. And it seemed like there was an Osaka I think I'm getting her right her name right there's like a there's like a four-part

Osaka thing a four-part clone trooper thing and then like two or three Anakin episodes and that was it I watch Clone Wars but it's been so long I feel like I've forgotten the details. It's got one of those catch-you-up kind of deals at the beginning of it, and I wanted to see how it looked. You know, it'd been so... I'm the same way. It'd been a really long time, but it was the...

They finally did the final season of the damn thing, so I wanted to watch it. Before you knew it, fucking Darth Vader's there, and that's getting... It's like, whoa! Hmm. All right, I guess a lot happened while we were with Osaka.

All right, it's a lot happened while we were with Osaka. All right, it's over. Oh, when Disney bought Star Wars, I was one of the few people who was kind of excited about it. I was like, you know what? Hey, you're not making movies otherwise. Fire it up. Let's see what we got.

Now, something about Star Wars. Everybody likes it and nobody loves it. and that's just how it keeps landing I don't like it I don't like Star Trek anymore either what's current on Star Trek I don't even know oh the Picard thing I haven't watched Picard

and the what's the fucking super lame one that that's like two seasons in? Discovery. Oh, Discovery is an abortion. Really? Discovery is disgusting. And then, yeah, Picard was just an abomination.

It's just so bad. It's so bad. You make me want to see it. Yeah, I'm at least curious about it. Watch it. bad. It's so bad. You make people want to see it. I'm at least curious about it. Watch it. Like, they just completely, first of all, it's convoluted

and their own storyline doesn't make sense when you really stop and like, wait a minute. Why can't the Romulans evacuate their own planet? Why do they need anybody else's help? Oh, they don't have enough ships.

Huh. Oh, but look, they don't have enough ships. Huh? Oh, but look, there's literally a thousand ships that show up for the battle. It's just ridiculous. They bring back old characters and literally torture them to death in one scene. Like a pretty beloved character from Voyager. Seven of Nines in it. I hope it's Neely. Does Neely get tortured to death?

That's Neelix, and no, he does not fuck and uh it it's just bad patrick stewart is too old like i didn't think i would have a problem with him being too old because it was like all right he'll play the he'll play the retired captain and he somehow needs he looked old in the 90s so he looks in the 90s so he looks decrepit well okay in the like twitter posts and such i see he looks a little older but roughly like i remember it dude he can't so so like even if patrick stewart is still kind of with it captain picard is long gone over the hill captain picard can't jog captain picard is long gone over the hill. Captain Picard can't jog. Captain Picard is always huffing and puffing in any action scene. Captain Picard is just a broken down version of his former self. Who does things that don't make any sense?

Like if you watched all of his shit before, all that next generation stuff, you're like, wait a minute, Picard didn't like Data. Data was like a co-worker. Geordi was Data's friend. They were like this. They were buddies. Picard didn't give a shit about Data.

And this, Picard's really dreaming about Data, having these weird dreams about Data because Data died in the last movie data and he defended him when he needed his help but he like you said they weren't they were co-workers there was a respect yeah but in this they make it out to be like this this like brotherly love story that they've got or like father-son thing almost that like he's he can't forget about data he can't get him out of his mind

and it's it's bad it's real bad there's a couple of terrible actors in it a lot of like one dimensional characters in it that are just hard to watch after five or six episodes of this shit the production value is great they're on location and it looks good. The ship battles look great. The ships themselves look cool. There are some cool actors in there, but the story makes no fucking sense. Not even a little bit. It's just bad. We'll see.

I wish I had watched it. I like a thing in Star Trek that I think I have a minority opinion. The Star Trek movies fucking sign me up. You know, it's like we've got some space pirates here is anyone good at base jumping and motocross because that's the skill set that'll solve this problem all right fine yeah yeah some fighter pilots in there play some rock music and we got ourselves a star trek movie and i'm like yeah sabotage rocket baby like i I'm jazzed. I have watched that scene where they play sabotage to bust all the mining ships up a hundred times on YouTube. It's on YouTube.

And I crank it up. That movie's so bad. I like the first one. I like the first Star Trek. I'll admit most people will agree with you, but I agree with me. And I like that movie fair enough Star Trek the one where he's like

tell our kids I love them you know as he's yeah that's the first one see what we're talking about you remember one scene from that one movie you watched a time or two a time the first Star Trek in particular was amazing now that also

i had to admit i like that one yeah it was it was fresh and it had been so long since they'd done anything that it really won me over and still i could i i would i would like if i watched it today they did both of the sequels they did a couple of things with the first one in particular. This is the reboot one. One, it had the stuff I enjoy. Like, literally, they're like space mining, base jumping, shooting up, like, to solve problems right at the start of the movie. But the plot line was actually clever and complex. It involved time travel, and it enabled them to sort of reset the canon in a way that fit the canon so they could tell more stories and the only thing that didn't make sense and i bet you never thought about this because i hadn't either so that romulan guy goes back in time right following spock okay Spock. Okay. Spock comes out in the time

of when Kirk's being born. Back in time, like 80 years or whatever it was. A long way. Then he destroys the ship that Kirk was being born on and kills Kirk's father and Kirk escapes an escape pod. Right? Baby Kirk.

Okay. He makes it to Earth, grows up, and becomes a grown-ass man so that he can very quickly get on board the enterprise and graduate from starfleet all that stuff where the fuck was the romulan while kirk was growing up stealing cars going to Starfleet getting all of his degrees doing that fucking competency test, learning to shoot a phaser fucking all those green bitches where was the Romulan during

all of those 25-30 years he was chilling out there in space waiting on Spock I just imagine him sitting there like time does not fly when you're just sitting here for 20 years, does it? That's the biggest plot hole in that movie,

but I admit, that movie is fun. I liked something new because it had been... I mean, did I mention base jumping? Because that was cool. Well, it was more like a halo jump. That was incredible. It was cool. And then Mr. Sulu pulls out some sort of flexi-foldy sword out of his back.

Like, holy shit. Why did they have that on board? I don't care because now he has a sword. Some guys were badasses. Not so good with Jeeps and mailboxes. I shave with this. Problem? It's like a folding katana.

Yeah, I don't know. Star Wars and star trek have just become abominations i when's the last time they came out with a new fucking property that was worth a fuck i mean even now they're they're they're spending like a billion dollars on avatar uh sequels that are supposed to be coming out i feel like i've heard about that for ages now he's making them all i think he's making them all like at the same time or something lord of the rings style i i liked avatar but i just liked it like seven out of ten it's it's weird that it became like one of the highest i think that what happened is they were one of the first movies to really do 3d well and people went to see it for that and now it's been funded and misinterpreted as like some star trek star wars marvel levels like uh platform 2009 or

something before that i think i think it appealed to a lot of demographics i think i think the same way star wars does like i think kids liked it nerds liked it old people liked it, and a lot of the characters were blue, so even black people liked it. They were like, I can get on board with this. I understand a minority being exploited for their natural resources. Let's go. Savage Americans liked it.

Well, they don't pay. They sneak in. Jesus Christ, I thought I was going to get in trouble. Anyway. Hey, yo-ha, hey, yo-ha. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know if i give a shit about that i mean like like i like that movie uh like tom cruise i can think of like three tom cruise movies that are better than uh avatar and deserve more sequels like minority report remember that movie like that

that's in the future where he's like a time cop where they can i need to see that again oh they predict murders before they happen and then he drops into the ceiling on a rope and he's like, stop before you kill that person. Tomorrow. They're like, what the fuck? How'd you know? And they lock him up forever. And Edge of Tomorrow, that shit was badass too.

That might be an answer to Kyle's question of when's the last time they came out with a good new property. I mean like a franchise. It won't be, you say? I'm hoping it won't be. Okay, so ahead of my head there's a sequel.

Yeah, maybe you're right. What's a good new property? Something that got a sequel that doesn't suck. Like, Bourne? Very liberal. That's old. Bourne was okay, but that's early 2000s right mission impossible is the biggest franchise going right now i bet i hear you that's the opposite of new isn't that from the 60s or something yeah yeah well it's but but you know the tom cruise led

mission impossibles or started in like oh one by that like that but if you use that yardstick i could be like well the marvel thing's the best new property going right now which is the opposite of a new property right like it's yeah yeah an original property i guess is that yeah would be the way to put it that something that somebody fucking screen wrote not based on some other john wick john wick has been popular yeah super popular they're gonna keep making them too yeah it makes a ton of money every time and they're badass they're great I've seen all three I like them all

it's new and it's not as big as some of the ones we talked about but it's big and it's I got one yeah yeah you're right I like that franchise they're making the fourth one right now I've only seen the first one Keanu's aging a bit for me as an action star like literally the actor I like that franchise. They're making the fourth one right now? I've only seen the first one. Shit.

Keanu's aging a bit for me as an action star. Like, literally, the actor is... Like, when Seagal was still making action movies, but he shouldn't have been, he just didn't move the right way. He had no athleticism, and they put him in athletic situations. He's still making action movies.

Keanu's not that bad, but also he's not, you know, he's not, uh, who's the Chinese stunt man. Who's actually an actor. Uh,

he does his own stunts. Yeah. Yeah. Um, Jackie Chan, Jackie Chan. I was going for Jackie Chan. Yeah.

Like Jackie Chan, you saw him do his stuff and it was like, shit, that guy moves like an athlete. That guy moves like a kung fu martial artist, genius person. Keanu, I just see age in the way that he moves. Keanu's 55, and he looks tremendous for 55. Yeah, his girlfriend's like the same age as him too, which is commendable uh he uh i don't know he moves really good with the weapons um and he does a lot of like mixed

martial arts in the in the uh in in the movies that's i don't know 75 legit yeah it's uh it's off i would say that's fair you know there's some nonsense but it's a movie i i guess i don't know i didn't notice the age on him he still runs pretty well that that's the telltale for me is like is how they run tom cruise great runner like he's known for being a great runner he looks good there's no way sly stallone looks okay running there's no way not. I'm looking at Keanu. He's a good 55, but I still see 55 in him. Like, does that make sense? Like, I don't know. He's half sneaky American.

That's what's doing it for him. Not to make it about me, but I feel like I'm a good 47. But you look closely, there's still 47 in there, right? Isn't Keanu, like, part Asian asian or that's what i just said i said he's half sneaky american oh i didn't see i haven't caught up with all your new terms yeah i actually didn't understand we're trying to be more pc around here he's partially sneaky yeah um he looks white oh the running thing look at his eyelids i thought it was interesting about um so what's will smith's son they're sneaky jayden maybe jayden yeah so will smith is trying to make jayden a movie star this is 10 six years ago something right and uh one of the first things

he does is he he sees his son run, and he's like, no. And he brings in a running coach. I think the guy might be an Olympian, or maybe he was on the Olympic team, whatever. And he's like, girls will judge you after one second of running. You have got to learn to run like an action star.

And they brought him in, and they did running coaches and taught him how to run. Well, Will Smith runs well. I don't know if he still does, but he always has. And I thought it was interesting.

Cause you're right. That run. It's a, it's a, it could be Usain Bolt. He is not going to be a star. Well, yeah,

but this is before they knew that. And, and, you know, he was just trying to set him up for success. Yes. After earth is this movie that Willith tricked a bunch of people into making about really yeah it's in the future and jay and his son plays his son in the movie and they have this like ridiculous accent that he tries to do for some reason that's like a made-up fucking accent

that's like a mishmash of all earth accents and the premise is that we left earth like a thousand ten thousand years ago or some shit and we live on this other planet but but on these other planets we've been fighting this like race of like animalistic aliens that are like these four-legged like werewolf alien monster things and uh we they they win the war against those things that we started of course and they've got one imprisoned on their ship that will smith and his fucking son are on for some reason and they crash land on earth where humans haven't been for like i said either a thousand or ten thousand years it doesn't make a fuck because they suggest that in a thousand or 10,000 years. It doesn't make a fuck. Because they suggest that in a thousand or 10,000, it doesn't make a fuck which,

because both are incredibly tiny numbers on the grand scale of time. Evolution has happened. Will Smith has this line. He's like, this planet has evolved. Everything on this planet has evolved to kill humans for the last 10,000 years. It was like, first of all,

nothing evolves. First of all, nothing really evolves that much in 10,000 years, all right? Like, it might get some more stripes. The years might get a little longer. But we're not creating any whole new races of animals. Second of all,

why would anything evolve to kill humans if there are no humans on Earth anymore, which there aren't. This movie sounds retarded. Will Smith breaks his leg. They crash land. Will Smith's got a broken leg. He's fucked up.

The legs, he has to like, tourniquet it, and the fear he's gonna lose the leg if he doesn't get the blood supply back down to the bottom part of his leg. Is there like space magic to fix that? The space magic is in the tail of the plane, and the boy's gotta go that? The space magic is in the tail of the plane. And the boy's got to go find the transponder

in the tail of the plane, radio for backup to planet Xenon bullshit, and get some help to come down. So his son is the star of the movie going on this mission through this Earth jungle avoiding the alien, which has landed with them and escaped, of course.

So Will Smith didn't even hit it that much no they tricked you they they offered will smith pulled it out from under you and gave you little weirdo jayden smith who can't fucking act an important detail we've left out is this movie came not so far after the footsteps of independence day that's how they you know independence day happened and will smith like, you know, I'm thinking about making another space alien movie. Studios are like, how much money do you want?

Take my money with the Fry meme. And then he's like, yeah, yeah, so one little hiccup. My son's actually the star. I mean, I'll be in it. You'll get Will Smith. You can market his Will Smith movie, but it's a platform to make my son a movie star someone paid for it i want to say they're one of the one of the part of the premise is that will smith and like anybody who the aliens are blind

and deaf but they can they're helen keller um but they can uh they sense your fear they can smell your fear that's it when uh when when a human is afraid they like smell the pheromones and they and they attack so will smith and everybody will smith is a super uber uber badass because he's one of the few who can cleanse himself completely of fear and and like Ninja Warrior the aliens, like hundreds at a time with a battle axe or something, because he has no fucking fear. And so the journey the son has to make is to master his own fear.

Yeah, very dumb. Super dumb! Super dumb! And you know what the worst thing is? I just looked it up. Jaden Smith is 5'7". R.I.P. acting. Womp womp womp.

Wait, wait. Tom Cruise. Yeah, I was going to go there. Actually, I think that it's one of the cliches. When you meet your favorite actor, they're shorter. 5'7 and white. They're better looking and shorter than you think they are. Jaden Smith isn't white.

Tom Cruise is, though. Yeah, that's true. Oh, he's successful. Touche. I want to watch that new Tom Cruise movie. The fucking Top Gun movie. Who's the really talented actor? I don't love so much. Maybe Jamie's something. He can sing. He can act.

He can probably do more. What's he in? Or she, Jamie? It He can sing. He can act. He can probably do more. What's he in? Or she, Jamie? It's a guy. He's a strong He's like a black action star. I thought Say it again. Jamie Foxx. Yeah, I think it is Jamie Foxx.

How tall is he? How tall is he? I don't know, but you can always subtract some height off of those guys in Hollywood. They're much smaller. It says he's 5'9", which means he's probably 5'7". I don't know why I thought I knew that. But yeah.

See? Short black. Big time star. 5'9 is not that bad. He throws some boots on. He's getting close to six. Is Jaden still growing? Those are some enormous boots. Well, he's 21, so

I don't think so. You'd have to be pretty late to puberty to still be growing at 21. I hit puberty at 19. I don't... Yeah, I... I was definitely done growing. Yeah. No, I was done growing at probably 19.

11 to 20 were some good years.'s how i hit eight and a half feet all right you want to wrap it up there yeah sure outros nope check out check out all the sponsors they're linked down below very good pka 493